#like yeah I'm making new friends at uni but...
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insistonyourcupofstars · 4 months ago
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Oh god, I miss my friends
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tiddiesoutwhenthetisout · 7 months ago
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not me curling my laptop charger wire the way you curl band equipment cords HAHAHA god i miss it
#i really said “okay big performance in the city square let's make this work” and i did but absolute fuckery of the manager just made me...#and she also used to complain about being an opening act-- like come on that's a nationally-renowned band and we're not there yet 😭#we used to fight a lot though so ack i really should have taken that as a red flag#but i was 14 and stupid 🤷‍♂️#being solo way better uM i shouldn't say this yet but i got a commission today audhauagah i don't even have a portfolio#fuck guys i'm so so so nervous from big changes in life because uM god i just came from actual hell with various things working to make me#kms#but uH we're uH not too keen on that anymore atm and uH it's probably going to all fuck up after i share that i have good news in life#but yk what#let's keep challenging god#i know he hates me#but we will not be defeated we will strangle him by the tie#AHHHH help me i want to get into music again pls pls pls pls pls#anyway back to my old band manager#she was known for being a shitwad in the scene anyw but i was young and stupid as i sais#and i defended her and rationalized her behavior because “we're friends right”#i'm starting to get why my mom is wary of people i get to know#i'm tbh a fucking idiot i would never admit that elsewhere (nah i do) uM my brain is bouncing off the walls#i took a bargain with 7pm coffee and look where it got me#i was also getting up there in my 5 days of uni absences agsgshags#DOES ANYONE ACTUALLY READ THESE I KINDA HOPE NOW NO ONE DOES#IM KINDA UHHH MY CHILD THERAPIST SAID UNCONVENTIONAL#I THINK SHE MEANT FUCKING CRAZY#sorry#oh yeah i walked tf out the band after that big performance set up just for us because i couldn't keep working with that kind of environment#other bands started flocking to recruit or proxy after i was let go by my famously fucked-up ex-manager LOL#but um i have issues so i'm not among them and i think they get the message tbh#appears and disappears#that is actually my brand
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perilegs · 10 months ago
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it's funny that now that i don't really have much about my body to be dysphoric about my brain makes up psychological dysphoria and it's so dumb
#''oohh only people who are attracted to men but are slightly scared of what they deem real men (not you) will be attracted to you''#''or those people AND chasers AND ppl who just see you as a curiosity to test out''#like how do i even unpack the bs my brain is throwing at me#yeah maybe some part of me believes that but the logical part of me knows it's not true#i think what's causing this is that i'm still kinda new at being stealth while passing#like yeah ive been going as leevi for the entire duration of uni and living as a man but passing regularly started happening to me after#i started t#now i only get misgendered the same amount as cis men with shoulder length hair#so like. it's happened once after starting t lmao#i think what's causing this (the psychological warfare from my brain) is the combination of stress#and me actually becoming friends with a co worker i'm not out to#listen ive been trying to hint at being trans but he was born a guy and lives as a guy so hes not very tuned out on this stuff#though his partner is nb and ive met them and they think i'm cis too which i think is hilarious bc i feel like#i'm v easy to clock for trans ppl#though idk im fagging it up quite a bit so it makes me pass extra well so#anyways#im a bit conflicted about the situation#im not going to outright tell him i think but i'm not going to hide it if it comes up#which i know i dont have to do but i want to#we'll probably go swimming together this summer so if that doesnt make him realize it hes a lost case and i dont#need to worry about it lmaoo#also i bought shorts that arent sport shorts and they looked normal on me so im literally unstoppable#but yea thank u for listening to me i just needed to ramble#leevi talks
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mywritersmind · 2 months ago
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THIGH HIGHS - LN4
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summary : In which Lando likes thigh high socks and his best friends sister far too much.
listen up : my first time writing full smut… oral, swearing, p in v, teasing, age gap!! fewtrell!youngersister!!
words : 1610
⋆。‧˚⋆
Lando knew to stay in Max’s room. He was told explicitly to stay put. But Lando has never been good at following directions.
The loud bang in the kitchen was what broke him. He walked down the hall, praying it was Max’s cat or maybe P came home early!
It was not.
Lando mentally swore at the sight. She stood on her toes, trying to reach a mug that was too high. One hand was braced on the counter as her foot popped up. Lando looked at the counter, ceramic pieces shattered on it which explained the loud noise.
He should turn away. He would have, if not for her little squeal as she finally got her fingers on a mug and hopped off the counter, looking directly at him.
It wasn’t her slow blink or the sight of her in a thin oversized shirt… though both those things had Lando close to losing it, It was her socks.
Thigh high, too tight, stark white… socks.
“Oh! I didn’t know you were here.” She smiles softly, turning around and bopping back to the kitchen island to finish her drink making.
She’s lying. Him Max Fewtrell were her teachers growing up, Lando sees right through her.
He clears his throat, “Uh yeah… I could say the same for you.”
She shoots him a small smile before looking back at her mug, the kitchen now filled with the familiar smell of hot chocolate. “Want a cup?” She asks, dipping the spoon in her mouth and slowly pulling it out.
He mindlessly sits across from her as she moves around the kitchen to make more, her hair bouncing behind her.
His eyes were glued to her as she slid around in those bloody socks. They were the same socks she wore all throughout highschool with her prissy little skirt and uniform top.
The same socks that she would flaunt as she draped her legs over the couch while Lando and Max were playing video games.
Lando knew she was in college now but that didn’t make the sight, or his thoughts, any better.
The completion of her outfit, a thin shirt that dipped right above the socks and made it clear that she wasn’t wearing a bra, did not help.
She slides a mug to him, smiling in that sweet and innocent way she always has. “Tell me if you like it. It’s a new recipe.” She sips her hot chocolate at the same time as Lando, her lipgloss being left as a kiss on the ceramic.
Lando nods, “It’s really fucking good.”
This makes her grin grow, biting her bottom lip to restrain herself, “Good. So, what are you doing here?”
Lando quirks a brow, “Max and I are filming later.”
She nods slowly, “Right…”
“Well what are you doing here?” He raises a brow, bringing the mug to his lips again.
“I’m on spring break.”
“And you’re spending it with your brother?”
“I just got back from cabo…” She says as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Her tan did hint at it though. “I go back tomorrow though.”
“Ah, uni… how’s that going for ya?” He leans back in his chair as she backs up against the countertop.
“Great. Minus the guys.” She sighs purposefully, looking around the room. “How’s the whole F1 thing?”
He smiles at her tone, nodding, “Good.”
“You know! It’s funny… Max gets to go all the time, yet I'm never invited.” She pouts, crossing her legs.
“You never ask.” He makes a point to look at her in the eyes when saying it.
“I’m asking now.” Something about her voice screams DONT CROSS! DANGER! GO BACK! But Lando just sits up straighter.
“Fine then, come to australia.”
She finishes her drink, hopping up on the counter so her head is hitting the cabinets now. Lando sucks in a breath as she looks at him, “Only if I get to stay in your room.”
Christ he might just fall off this bloody chair.
“Stop that.” Lando shakes his head, leaning back in his chair and gripping his mug a little too tight.
“Stop what?” She smirks, completely mischievous and faking innocence.
“Being a little shit.”
She scoffs, jokingly. Putting a hand on her chest and frowning, “You wound me, Lan.”
“You not getting enough attention at school? Guys don’t fall at your feet everywhere you go?” It’s bad but the most he can do to stop his words is a mental slap on his face.
“They do… You’re just more fun to play with.”
“I’m too old for you.”
“Don’t pretend like you don’t think it’s hot. Five years isn’t even that bad- Would it make you feel better if I said I’ve gotten with a fourt-”
“No!” He stops her, standing up and washing out his cup to busy himself, “It’s not just the age thing.”
“So you’d get with me if I wasn’t your best friend's sister?” He turns to look at her, her legs squeezed together and practically begging to be touched.
“I didn’t say that.”
Her shirt is riding up her thighs more and it makes Lando’s stomach drop. He licks his lips as she looks at him, “Lan.” she practically whines, “I need someone experienced.”
He shakes his head, his eyes still on her body as she rubs her thighs together, “I haven’t orgasmed in forever… at least, not from a guy.” He lets out a little sigh, walking closer.
“You can touch me.” She looks up at him, her eyes full of lust as the tightness in his pants grows.
“I shouldn’t.” He braces himself on either side of her.
“Then I'll touch myself.” It’s almost a whisper, but definitely a promise. She slips her hand under her shirt, making it pool around her thighs and teasing her cotton underwear.
Lando thinks he might be dreaming as she slips her hand into her panties, her breathing picking up as she leans her head back.
“Lan…” she whimpers, “Feels so good…” she locks eyes with him, his mouth slightly open as he watches her.
He watches her fingers move under the fabric, dipping farther as her moans grow louder. His hands slide from the marble to her thighs, just the outsides in an attempt to control himself.
He’s rock solid now, his hands gripping her legs and feeling the smooth fabric under his fingers. Her nipples are hard and poking through her shirt. Her eyes meet his again as he breathes harder, her hand slowly pulls away, dripping.
She’s holding it in front of his face, inching closer just for him to take her fingers in his mouth. She’s smirking wickedly as he sucks. “Good boy.” she whispers.
Her fingers leave his mouth with a ‘pop’ and just as he goes in to kiss her, she shakes her head and slips her hand into his hair, pushing down.
He watches her eyes as he dips down, pulling down her panties and replacing them with his tongue. She moans, loudly, at the contact.
Every doubt either of them had is gone now, replaced with pleasure and pure need.
She grips his hair as his hands hold her in place, his mouth sucking and linking as one of his hands moves up her shirt, grabbing her tit and making her moan louder.
Lando was in heaven, fucking her with his tongue and listening to her moan under his touch. That is, until she pulled him back up.
“Fewtrell.” He growled, neither of them done.
She pulled him closer, kissing him finally. She bites his lip a bit as he grinds into her, his hard length begging for attention. “Someone’s needy.” She teases as he kisses her harder, his tongue exploring her mouth while he fingers the top of her socks.
“Please.” He’s pretty sure it’s the first time he’s begged a girl for something.
“Please what?” Her breath is hot against his, “Use your words.”
“Let me fuck you.”
This satisfies her, a cheeky smile meeting him as his hands slowly pull off her shirt.
Her nipples are hard when he takes one into his mouth, her head falling back as he runs his tongue over it.
She reaches down and skillfully unzips his pants, moving her hand over his hard clothed dick. He’s throbbing, so sensitive to the touch he’s been waiting for.
“This for me?” She whispers as his head falls on her shoulder, her hand moving back and forth. He nods, unable to speak as she palms him.
He pulls off his pants and boxers, not even caring to get them off his legs before he lines up to her. “I don’t want you to regret this.” He whispers, out of breath and fully blinded by lust, but not stupid.
She looks straight into his eyes, “Fuck me, Lando.”
So he does, pushing into her and almost losing it straight away. He goes slow at first, watching her mouth shake and her head fall back. She grabs onto his shoulder, moaning loudly in the kitchen that’s neither of theirs.
“You’re so fucking hot.” She moans as he thrusts into her, biting her shoulder and kissing her neck, “Yes!”
He whimpers as she tightens around him, wanting to give her the one thing idiot college guys can’t.
She cums in a rush of heated breaths and her nails dragging over Lando’s skin. He cums seconds later on those snow white thigh highs.
He falls against her in a slump, her heart beating fast against him. She’s smiling still, running her hands through Lando’s curls and saying, “I’m definitely coming to australia.”
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codnasties · 4 months ago
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bull rider!ghost 👻
having an uni bestie that's from a small rural town as someone who was born and raised in a city has it's perks, like getting to experience things you had never experienced before. and i'm talking about going to a rodeo.
crowd roaring as a new rider sat on an angry bull and got tossed into the air as the animal bucked fiercely. the first few wild dudes that you had seen were interesting. you know, the attraction of something new that you had never really seen before. but after a handful of them it started getting a bit boring, but your friend was cheering on so loudly and seemingly enjoying that so much it would probably be rude to tell them that you weren't having so much fun.
trying to find some kind of entertainment, you told your friend you were going to go and get a drink, because at this moment a beer looked like it would bring you some semblance of entertainment.
but you were wrong, because as you make your way back to the rodeo grounds, your eye caught a rider that was different. he had a commanding and charming aura to him, something that impelled you to look at him. well, maybe it was more that just the way he carried himself.
it was the way those jeans seemed to hug those thick thighs of his, how, with the help of the chaps he was wearing, they left little to imagination, giving you a perfect view of his ass. and oh what an ass! and his shirt... the way his strong and built muscle seemed to flex and ripple with each movement that he made.
when you finally made it back to where your friend was sitting - which took you longer than the way to the bar because of adoring such a man -, this mysterious dude was now on the chute, lowering himself onto one hell of an angry bull.
while the rest of the riders had caught your eye, there was nothing but anticipation inside of you to see him try to tame that ton and a half bull. and he did not disappoint, the beast beneath him bucking trying to get him of.
it wasn't just the way he has holding on or how long those eight seconds seemed to last when it was him on the arena. it was the way his hips swayed trying to follow the bulls movements, the way the bicep of the arm he was using to hold on became impossibly bigger with the tension, the veins that were proptinding on the hand he had up in the air, the glimpse of tattoos on his forearm as the sleeve of his shirt got pulled by his muscles.
before you ever realised, the buzzer had sounded, indicating that the time necessary was over and that he could now get off the bull. and when he did, you became even more intrigued by him and how fucking tall he looked and how he, amazingly, had managed to keep the hat he was wearing on his head the whole time.
seeing how entranced you were by this one specific rider, your friend immediately gave you that information that you were unknowingly desperate to know. "his name is simon riley, but they call him ghost"
"ghost?", you asked them back.
"yup, because of the way he rides, breaks records and then fucking vanishes. the public doesn't really know much about him or his personal life. and it's also a know fact that is hard to even get to meet him and talk to him" they explained. "oh, an also he ghost every single person that he fucks'
"hmm interesting", you hummed, starting to get into your head that as much as this 'ghost' seemed attractive and got you horny just from looking at him, he was quite unreachable and maybe a bit of an asshole.
"yeah, the man's a beast at what he does", they exclaimed, cutting your thought process.
"i can see, you don't need me to tell me twice", you uttered back.
"and he's actually a cousin of mine! let me introduce you to him'" they gave you further explanation.
you couldn't help the immediate 'oh' that left you. because you actually had a chance to talk to this man an maybe, maybe try to cham your way into those tight jeans of his. because an asshole has his charm, you know?
₊˚ ✧ ‿︵‿୨୧‿︵‿ ✧ ₊˚
hope y'all enjoyed that, i just pulled this out of my pussy.
no smut just pure hornyness. anyways, save a horse ride a cowboy or sum
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the-offside-rule · 1 year ago
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Lando Norris (McLaren) - All Over Again
Requested: yes
Prompts: 5) "If I could, I'd like to fall in love with you all over again."
48) "I love our cuddles."
49) "Stay here tonight."
Warnings: none tbh
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Lando couldn't believe he was back in England, the familiar sights and sounds bringing a rush of nostalgia. He had done what he always did; gone for his morning run, ordered a hot chocolate to take away, and head on home to have his pre-made breakfast. As he strolled through the town, he couldn't help but wonder what had changed since he left for his racing career. Little did he know, he was about to encounter a significant blast from the past. He figured he may as well have a proper look around this time and so, he made his way up a side street, looking around and even spotting a few new shops.
Walking up a small street, off from his usual route, Lando's eyes widened as he spotted Y/n, the girl he had once been deeply in love with and even dated whilst he was in Formula 2. They broke up in 2020 since they both just didn't have the time and promised that if the opportunity every rose again, they would revisit it. Time seemed to freeze for a moment, and then, recognizing him, Y/n's eyes lit up with surprise and joy. "Lando? Is that really you?" She exclaimed, a mix of disbelief and excitement in her voice. He grinned. "Yeah, it's me! How have you been?" Lando asked as the pair embraced one another. "I'm good. Still on the hot chocolate or have you made the move to coffee?" She asked, pointing at the cup in Lando's hand. "I've never liked coffee and I never will. How's uni going?"
"I just finished up last year. I'm kinda just working for now until I have enough to move away." She replied. "Move away? What would make you want to do that?" Lando asked. "Well you tell me. Last I heard of you was you moved to Monaco. Very fancy." She joked. They exchanged stories, catching up on the years that had passed since they last saw each other. Laughter echoed through the air as they reminisced about old memories and shared new experiences. It was as if time hadn't dimmed the connection they once had.
Lando, felt some serious nostalgia. "I'm going to have to head now. I have some things to do. But good luck and it was lovely seeing you again." Y/n smiled. "Yeah, we should get coffee or something sometime." He replied and watched as Y/n walked past him. As she walked away, he couldn't help but think that maybe this was the time to revisit their relationship, and so, he turned and jogged back towards her to give a suggestion. "Hey, why don't you come over to my place? We can continue our conversation there." Y/n shook her head. "I have a few things to drop of to my mum's. I really can't."
"I'll come with you. I haven't seen her jn ages anyway." Y/n thought for a moment. Her mum would make such a fuss over Lando being back. She always brought Lando up, even to Y/n's last boyfriend. That conversation about Lando led to their break-up and since then she's always shrugged off any Lando conversations. "Okay fine." She said as Lando began to walk with her. "Do you want me to take something? Your hands seem full." Y/n nodded. "Please take the shopping bag. Its killing me here." Labdo laughed as he effortlessly lifted the back and hoisted it up over his shoulder. "Alright. Don't be such a show off."
Their break-up hadn't left a bitter taste, and they remained friends. The sun was shining, adding a warm glow to their amiable conversation. As they approached Y/n's mum's house, memories flooded back. Lando couldn't help but notice the nostalgia in Y/n's eyes. The door swung open before they even had a chance to knock, revealing Y/n's mum, who beamed at the sight of them. "Lando! Oh, it's been too long!" She exclaimed, enveloping Lando both in a tight hug. "Nice to see you too, Mum." Y/n mumbled as Lando grinned. "Come inside, I've just brewed some tea."
Once inside, the cozy aroma of freshly brewed tea filled the air. Y/n's mum ushered them to the living room, where memories of shared laughter echoed. They settled in, sipping tea and catching up on life. Y/n's mum couldn't help but glance between them, her eyes sparkling with curiosity. "And that crash in Germany last year. Dreadful." Her mum said. "It was Belgium, Mum." Y/n corrected. Labdo turned and smirked at her. "Thought you didn't keep up with F1." The last time he saw her, she didn't really. She only really watched it when she was with Lando. "I can watch it if I want." She replied, sipping her tea. "Oh, you two always made such a lovely couple. Any chance you're getting back together?" She inquired with a mischievous grin.
Y/n spat her tea into the cup, as Lando gave an amused glance towards Y/n. "No, we're just good friends now." Y/n explained with a smile. "Well, that's good to hear. I always hoped maybe one day you'll find your way back to each other." Her mum said. Lando's lips twitched into a playful grin. "You never know. We could probably..." Y/n interrupted, taking it as a cue to change the subject. "Well, Mum, we've got a few more errands to run. Thanks for the tea!" They bid Y/n's mum farewell, stepping back into the sunlight. "Smooth, Lando." Y/n couldn't help but roll her eyes at Lando's comment. "What?" Lando asked as if he didn't know what he had just done. "You always know how to keep things interesting," Y/n teased. Lando chuckled. "Hey, just keeping the possibilities open, you know?" Y/n shook her head, laughter bubbling up from deep within. "You haven't changed a bit."
Lando led the way to his new home. It was huge. Bigger than the one he grew up in and Y/n found that mental. "This is yours? Are you sure?" She asked. "Trust me, it's mine." He replied, opening the door. "There's a few boxes around the place. This is all just moving stuff. Don't mind them."
The aroma of spices and sizzling ingredients filled Lando Norris' kitchen as he worked diligently to prepare dinner for his good friend, Y/n. He hummed along to a tune playing softly in the background, feeling a sense of accomplishment in trying his hand at a new recipe.
Y/n walked around, a glass of wine in hand, looking at the photos that hung on the walls. From family photos to podium photos, she enjoyed looking at them. One in particular caught her eye. It was her at Lando's final Formula 2 race. They were all smiles and she couldn't help but feel the memories washing over her.
Just as Lando reached for a pot handle, a sudden hiss of pain escaped him. Lando winced, realizing he had touched the hot surface without protection. He quickly pulled back, shaking his hand in an attempt to soothe the sting. "Fuck." Lando muttered to himself, glancing around for a nearby kitchen towel. Y/n entered the room, drawn by the sound of his exclamation. "What happened, Lando?" she asked, concern evident in her voice. Lando winced, trying to brush it off. "Yeah, just a little mishap. I guess cooking isn't exactly my forte."
Y/n chuckled softly, gently taking his arm to examine the burn. "Let me take care of that for you." As Y/n tended to his burn, Lando couldn't help but admire her delicate touch and caring nature. His gaze lingered on her, filled with a warmth he couldn't contain. "Don't look at me like that." Y/n said softly, catching Lando's gaze. Lando smirked teasingly. "Like what?" Y/n rolled her eyes playfully. "You know exactly what I mean." He shrugged. "Have no idea what you mean." Rolling her eyes again, Y/n suggested, "How about I do the cooking, and you just help grab things when I need them?" Lando nodded.
As Y/n stired some pasta around in the pot, she jumped upon hearing music. "Oh, sorry. Too loud." Labdo mumbled as he turned the volume down on a speaker nearby. "Why are you playing Put Your Records On?" She asked. "I like it. You like it too last time I checked." Lando said, beginning to dance a bit. "Last time you checked was four years ago." Y/n replied. "Oh come on, you haven't changed that much." Lando chuckled. "You wanna bet?" She challenged.
Lando nodded, moving her hair across her shoulder and placing a gentle kiss onto her neck. "You like neck kisses, don't you?" Y/n found herself blushing and biting her lip to hide her smile. Lando's arms made their way around Y/n's torso, his chin resting on her shoulder. "You're playing a dangerous game, Lando." She said. "I know." Y/n set the cooking spoon to the side and gave in, turning and lifting her arms up around Lando's neck, swaying along with him. Soon enough, they were dancing, spinning and jumping around, carefree and happy. "Oh shit! The pasta!"
As they settled on the couch to watch a movie, Lando wrapped an arm around Y/n, feeling the warmth of their shared history. The prompts echoed in his mind, and he couldn't resist expressing his emotions. "I love our cuddles." He admitted, a genuine smile on his face. Y/n snuggled closer. "Me too. It feels like we never missed a beat." Lando looked up to her, the look of a lovestruck puppy in his eyes. "Stay here tonight." He asked. "Lando, I have work tomorrow." She replied. "You're acting like something is going to happen." Lando said, wiggling his eyebrows. "Oh shut up." The pair began laughing. As the laughing quietened down, they found themselves leaning in, centimetres away from eachother.
Y/n swallowed the lump in her throat as Lando looked between her eyes and then down to her lip. "Alright, but only if you promise to make breakfast tomorrow, and I get to teach you how to cook properly." Lando grinned. "Deal." And with that, he leaned in and closed the gap between them, Y/n kissing back into his lips.
The movie faded into the background as they continued their kiss, both missing the feeling of the others lips on theirs. "If I could, I'd like to fall in love with you all over again." Lando whispered between kisses. He could feel Y/n smile against him. "Maybe we can take it one step at a time, starting with breakfast tomorrow morning." Lando shook his head, lifting her up off the couch and walking towards the door. "Or we could start now and just start where we left off."
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luvismenu · 5 months ago
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here i go — pjm one shot
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pairing: childhood friend!jimin x fem!reader
warnings: lots of scream (movie) references, virgin!jimin, teasing each other, smut.
summary: your virgin bsf wants to have a look at your boobs and you.. let him.
note: kind of like a bday + spooky szn special !!
wc: 2.2k+
♡ — permanent taglist: @https-mei @ari420sstuff @blaricee @jksctrl @blluee28 @jkvias @wnteraezz @whoa-jo @wobblewobble822 @jkslvsnella @clxssy1997 @nikkinikj @kayleesaltzmann @rrosiitas @naurnonope @lola75111 @somehowukook @redcherrykook @parkinglot-nights @deluluisdasolulu @minghaosimp @hyeon-yi @ririkookiemonster @svtrighthereworld @jmscaffeine @trinityxsope @taetaecatboy @butnotmontana @joyofbebbanburg @elinaki92 @sweetmimosa28
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“hello? who—”
“hello, ___. what's your favorite scary movie?”
“w-who are you? that's not funny, i swear i will c-call the cops—”
the voice on the other end laughs, the voice effect slowly dropping, revealing the familiar sound behind it. you immediately relax.
“fuck you.”
“come on!! it's spooky season.”
you roll your eyes.
“let me in, sweets. it's cold outside.”
you scoff and hang up, heading to the front door. you swing it open, glaring at the figure standing there.
“you're an asshole, you know that? you could've gone to prison!”
he steps past you, grinning, as he pulls off his gloves and jacket, his laugh barely under control. “y-you should've heard yourself!”
“seriously, jimin, that wasn’t funny. i almost peed my pants,” you grumble, closing the door and turning to him with your arms crossed.
“aw, poor ___, scared of the least scariest character ever.” he mocks you, sticking out his lower lip in a fake pout, then heads straight to your living room.
“what!? a serial killer is scary! especially if he's after me,” you follow behind him, still fuming. “and by the way, did you get a new number?”
“yep,” he says, collapsing onto your couch. “and you know i can't pass up an opportunity to scare the shit out of my favorite loser.”
“why am i even friends with you again?” you ask, plopping down next to him. he quickly pulls you in, wrapping an arm around your shoulder.
“hmm, lemme think.” he pauses for effect. “maybe 'cause we've been neighbors since birth, went to the same school, same uni? oh, and probably because i'm the only guy who knows every embarrassing detail about your life. yeah, that’s gotta be it.” he nods
you shove him playfully, laughing. “you're so annoying. i hate you.”
he chuckles, “oh come on, sweets, you know you love me.”
“whatever,” you mutter, but a small smile betrays you.
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“so, you got a boyfriend?”
“why? you wanna ask me out on a date?”
“maybe. do you have a boyfriend?”
“no.”
“you never told me your name.”
“why do you want to know my name?”
“because i want to know who i am looking at.”
“boo!!! casey had zero survival skills,” jimin suddenly exclaims, making you flinch.
you’ve watched the scream movies with jimin ever since you were kids. he loved them, but you were never a big fan. still, he insisted you’d watch at least one every year during “spooky season.” eventually, you got used to it. it doesn’t feel that scary anymore when he’s beside you.
your arm is linked through his, and your head rests comfortably on his shoulder as you continue watching the movie. the tension of the scene doesn’t bother you much, maybe because you’ve seen it too many times, or maybe because jimin’s presence keeps you calm.
well, except for the moments when he randomly yells at the screen and scares you half to death.
“so, you thought you’d climb through my window and have a little raw footage?"
“no, no. i wouldn’t dream of breaking your underwear rule. i just thought maybe we could do a little on-top-of-the-clothes stuff, just to make it pg-13.”
“you are a tease.”
“he doesn’t want you!” you boo at the screen, making jimin chuckle.
he glances at you from the corner of his eye, smirking. “___, why don’t we have a pg-13 relationship, huh?”
you scoff, rolling your eyes. “yeah, no, i’m not flashing my boobs.”
“but you’ve seen my dick!” he exclaims, his voice almost accusatory as you pull back, ready to fire back immediately.
“that was because you were proving it’s not small!” you remind him, your eyes narrowing.
“let this virgin have a look,” he pouts dramatically, sticking out his lower lip like that will convince you.
“i never asked to look at your dick when i was a virgin!” you shoot back, crossing your arms. he opens his mouth to counter, but before he can get a word in, you cut him off. “that doesn’t count. you were the one who showed me. i said i never asked for it!”
his lips twitch into a small smile as he tries one last desperate attempt. “pretty please, ___?” he pleads, giving you the full force of his puppy eyes.
you scoff, a small laugh escaping despite yourself. “fine!”
his eyes light up, and he sits there expectantly, waiting for you to pull your shirt off. you hesitate for a moment, your fingers lingering at the hem, but eventually, you tug it over your head, exposing the light pink bra with a small bow in the center.
his gaze drops instantly. he licks his lips. “pretty bra,” he murmurs
“thanks, pervert,” you joke, he's smirking like you just gave him the world’s weirdest compliment.
his grin widens, not even the slightest bit ashamed. “can i take it off?”
you bite your bottom lip, feeling your heart race as you nod. his hands come up, gentle and slow, as if he’s savoring every second. his fingers brush along the edges of your bra and trace the sides of your breasts, making your breath hitch.
then, with a quiet click , he unclasps the bra.
“okay?” he asks softly, his eyes meeting yours, giving you a chance to change your mind.
you swallow hard and breathe out, “okay.”
he hooks his fingers under the straps, sliding them down your arms and letting the bra fall away. his eyes darken as your breasts are fully revealed to him. the sight of your soft skin and perked nipples leaves him speechless, his chest rising and falling a little faster now.
“oh fuck...” he breathes, like the words slipped out without him realizing.
you feel the heat spreading through your body, an ache growing between your legs as you watch his reaction. the way his gaze lingers on your chest, the hunger in his eyes. it makes your core throb.
“touch me, jimin,” you say without a second thought. the words leave your mouth so easily, and the moment they do, he’s on you, not wasting a second. his hands cup your breasts, the warmth of his palms sending shivers down your spine as he starts rubbing your nipples with his fingers.
you squirm under his touch, your eyes fluttering shut when he rolls your nipples between his fingers, pinching them just enough to make you gasp.
“does that feel good?” he asks, his voice low.
you nod, biting your lip. the answer comes in the form of a soft moan when his mouth closes around your right nipple, sucking gently and teasing it with his tongue.
you glance down, watching the way his lips wrap around you, and it makes you dizzy with pleasure.
“sorry, couldn’t resist,” he mumbles against your skin, pulling back just enough to grin before trailing kisses along your breasts.
you let out a shaky breath, overwhelmed by the way he’s touching you. “are you sure you’ve never done this before?” you manage to ask between gasps.
his lips curl into a playful smirk. “love it too much?”
“i hate you,” you whisper, but the amused smile on your face tells a different story.
he chuckles softly and moves up to kiss your neck. “can i fuck you, ___?” he murmurs against your skin, his lips brushing your pulse.
“yes.” the word slips out of your mouth almost too quickly.
but then it hits you, and you pull back slightly. “w-wait, are you sure? i mean, do you really want me to be your first—”
he cuts you off with a kiss, his plump lips pressing against yours.
“mmmh...” you hum into the kiss, melting against him as his lips move against yours. it’s everything, soft, warm, and somehow exactly what you didn’t know you needed.
he pulls back just enough to meet your gaze, “i wouldn't have it any other way.”
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“why do you even have condoms?” jimin asks, positioned between your legs as he rolls the condom on. you’d told him they were in your nightstand, so now the two of you are on your bed, getting ready.
“uh, because i don’t wanna get pregnant?” you reply. “plus, i’m not the virgin here.”
the corners of his mouth lift into a teasing grin. “damn, there are actual people who wanna fuck you?”
you raise an eyebrow, matching his playful energy. “yeah, and you’re one of them.”
he chuckles, shaking his head. “touché.”
then, with a serious expression, he grabs your hips. “alright… here i go”
you burst into laughter, the words catching you off guard. “h-here i go? jimin, we’re not in kindergarten!” you laugh uncontrollably, and he frowns, making you laugh harder.
“shut up, i was just letting you know!” he glares you.
you try to stifle your laughter, barely holding it together. “right, right. sorry... you got this, champ!” and just like that, you lose it again, dissolving into more giggles.
he rolls his eyes dramatically, trying to look annoyed. “you’re turning me off, you know.”
you grin, glancing down between his legs. “so why’s your junior still standing, then?”
he blinks, surprised, before laughing along with you. “junior?” he echoes
“okay, okay, my bad,” you say, catching your breath.
“for real this time… here we go.” you give him a mischievous smile, and he shakes his head, biting his lip to hide a grin.
“you’re impossible,” he mutters under his breath, but his hands slide back to your waist, steadying himself.
the playful mood shifts into something more intimate as you relax into the bed beneath him. with one slow, deliberate motion, he pushes inside you.
he groans at the feeling, his hands tightening on your hips. you gasp softly, biting your lip as the warmth spreads through you.
he moves slowly at first, soft gasps and low moans falling from his lips with every thrust.
“fuck, you feel so good,” he groans, his hips starting to pick up speed. the sound of skin against skin fills the room, and it has you gripping the sheets tighter, trying to hold onto something��anything—because he’s driving you insane.
“jimin— y-yes, fuck!” you manage to stammer, though the words are slurred with pleasure. it barely even matters. all you know is that he feels fucking amazing inside you.
he grabs your legs and lifts them onto his shoulders without missing a beat, the new angle making his cock hit deeper.
“mmh, you're so fucking tight, baby,” he rasps,
as if you weren’t already lost in pleasure, his fingers find your clit. he starts rubbing it in slow, deliberate circles, all while his hips keep thrusting into you. the sensations are overwhelming; his cock filling you, his fingers working you.
you gasp, whimpering uncontrollably. every thrust, every rub, every movement sends shocks of pleasure through your body, leaving you trembling beneath him.
“j-jimin—” you choke on your own words, barely holding on as the intensity builds.
“that’s it, baby,” he groans.
you cry out, feeling your orgasm crash over you. your body tenses, back arching off the bed as you cum hard, soaking his cock. the pleasure is so overwhelming it borders on painful, leaving you gasping, crying, and writhing under him.
“so fucking pretty,” he breathes, mesmerized by the sight of you falling apart beneath him.
watching your cum drip down onto him only pushes him closer to the edge. with a few more frantic thrusts, he groans deeply, burying himself inside you as he spills into the condom.
his movements slow down, but he stays inside you for a moment, catching his breath. you lie there, panting and basking in the afterglow, bodies still pressed together.
“holy shit,” you whisper, heart pounding in your chest.
he chuckles softly as he pull out, “yeah... holy shit”
“are you sure this was your first time?” you chuckle breathlessly, your chest still heaving as you try to catch your breath.
he laughs along with you, the sound low and a little shy now that the heat of the moment has passed. “yeah, pretty sure,” he murmurs, rubbing the back of his neck. “unless i’ve been sleepwalking through sex.”
you giggle, “well, you didn’t exactly perform like a rookie.”
“natural talent, i guess.” he grins, but there’s a flush creeping up his neck that makes you laugh even more.
you both lie there for a moment in comfortable silence, the room filled with the sound of your soft breathing. there’s no awkwardness. just a weird sense of ease, like this was exactly how things were supposed to go.
“so… you got a boyfriend?” he breaks the silence, glancing over at you with a playful glint in his eyes.
you smile to yourself, and speak up. “why? you wanna ask me out on a date?”
“maybe. do you have a boyfriend?” he asks, with a teasing smirk playing on his lips.
“no.” you reply, meeting his gaze.
for a moment, you both hold the stare, and then it breaks as you burst into laughter, the room filling with the sound of it, light and carefree.
“so i did great, right?” he asks
“mmh, not bad,” you hum, pretending to be unimpressed, though the smirk on your face gives you away. “maybe a solid 8 out of 10.”
his jaw drops dramatically. “only an 8?”
“you lost points for saying ‘here i go’.” you tease, biting your lip to hold back your laughter.
“oh, come on!” he groans, covering his face with both hands. “i’ll never live that down, will i?”
“nope,” you say smugly, shifting closer to him on the bed.
he drops his hands, a grin spreading across his face.
“okay, but seriously sweets… you’re amazing.”
“you're too, jimin”
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star2fishmeg · 5 months ago
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can you share some of your Luke recs?
Of course! I may have gone a bit overboard but I just love love love all these fics and their authors so so much. I highly recommend all these writers and their blogs, from the nsfw to the sfw, I couldn't stress how highly I respect and recommend them enough:
≡ᴍᴇɢ's ʟᴜᴋᴇ ʜᴜɢʜᴇs ғɪᴄ ʀᴇᴄs
—SMUT
♥ again by @hhughes (you can find her on @bedsyandco now I think) ➥ I frequently find myself going back to this one, the way Cami has written it is just so addicting and it's so hot.
♥ the mortifying ordeal of being a 20 year old virgin by @theemporium ➥ This series is hard as hell, literally love it. Each chapter is just divine and I love Luke and reader's dynamic, it's so juicy and with every new chapter, I think I literally heel click and do a jig.
♥ escape from la by @eyesthatroll ➥ Another one I go back to often, still think about it to this day actually, I just picture it vividly and it gives me butterflies every time.
♥ locker room by @lucijawriteswords ➥ Words cannot describe how much of a chokehold this one has on me. Angry Luke is so hot and I can't stop thinking about the imagery and I want this so bad.
♥ those sleepless nights - @wineauntie ➥ I present to you; my bedtime story. Sleepy smut is just so yummy, you know? And I just wanted Luke wrapped around me after I read this, I now go back to it when it's some silly hour of the morning.
♥ stress reduction by @goldfades ➥ Bro I cannot begin to explain how many times I've read this one. Short and sweet and so sensual, I want it. You'll literally read it and feel something.
♥ risqué reflections by @sweetestdesire ➥ This is the place for filth and I'm a loyal customer. This fic had me doing deep breaths and GOD it's so yummy. Read it once and then went back because the buzz it gave me.
♥ the green eyed monster by @puck-luck ➥ Jealousy has never looked hotter on a man. I remember reading this one morning before uni and yeah let's say I wasn't thinking about my class that day. Andy went all in with this and Jesus it was hot as fuck.
—FLUFF
♥ he's been a bit of a jerk by @rowdyluv ➥ I've never liked the winter more, I need Luke to come find my lonely ass and kiss me too. This was too cute honestly and the second part is just as good. Recommend reading them back-to-back.
♥ too tall by @toasttt11 ➥ Anything to do with height differences has me in shambles and this was so cute. I just love the image of Luke standing in the kitchen at 12am like a deer in headlights.
♥ uh oh by @be4chywritez ➥ The Curtis-Luke rivalry will always make me giggle and even funnier with the sneaking around trope, I adored this and the locker room scene. The whole thing is so cute and lighthearted.
♥ jelly on a plate by @wineauntie ➥ I dislike the process of flying so this was a really comforting read and I love it so much. It's adorable and reassuring at the same time and if you're not a fan of flying, I really recommend having Luke with you in spirit.
♥ my princess by @lvrhughes ➥ No because this one's fun and fresh and adorable. Something about drunken nights will always get me, especially when it's one looking after the other. Filled my heart with warmth.
♥ caught by @ifimdreaming ➥ Love this one a lot, it's funny and cute. It perfectly portrays siblings having an argument and Trevor making an appearance will always be funny. Luke is just too cute and love me protective Luke.
♥ kiss her you fool by @withwritersblock ➥ Tooth rotting fluff, friends to lovers and just pining and that's my cup of tea. Loverboy Luke has you aching for him to be honest and you'll wish you were y/n and so much touching that has you tingling.
♥ "are you awake yet?" blurb by @bedsyandco @hhughes ➥ I wish I had this in my life, honestly. Read this and you wish you did too. It's so sweet it makes me kick my feet and twirl my hair, run laps around my room, go through my Luke Pinterest board. I love the way Cami writes Luke.
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yeonmuse · 6 days ago
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SYNOPSIS — Park Sunghoon doesn’t usually like involving himself with those at Chaconne academy, but when he finds out his little sister’s music teacher attends and she starts getting a little too close she forces him to let his guard down. Now he’s gotta juggle new people and new emotions entering his life and she’s got to face her past in order to hold tight to him and her future.
ᥫ᭡ f!reader x Park Sunghoon ── 𝒢enre. Uni au. fluff, angst non idol enha. feats. ot7 [reqs are closed] ᝰ.ᐟ 𝓁ibrary 🎻
⍣ �� AUTHORS NOTES . Strong angst themes, slow burn but mostly fluff. I’m not sure where this idea had come from considering I have 4 unfinished series out right now but I wrote this in 4 days so lets fucking go i guess??? Includes Choi Yeonjun, Bae Jinyoung, Kim Sunwoo, Jung Wooyoung, Shen Ricky, Xu Jiaqi and Asaya Jurin. Wc is 4.1k
PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4 | ENDING
“I can't believe you ditched us for Choi Yeonjun and his friends.’’ Jake complains, slamming his bag onto the chair nearest to him.
“What is he talking about exactly?’’ Sunghoon asks Jay who had only been a few steps behind.
“Yeonjun told everyone how he found you in Jurin and Jiaqis dorm and you all watched movies together.”
“It’s Choi Yeonjun, he's always saying shit.”
“Yeah but as much as he talks everything he does say is always true, so spill.’’ Jake had been quite adamant on having his friend explain ditching them last night.
“Not like I purposely tried to bail, Parents forced me take Yoari to give some things to her music teacher and she wanted to stay late that’s it.’’
“Wait wait backtrack, your sisters music teacher is one of Yeonjuns friends?’’
“You say that like it’s some sort of bad thing?’’ Sunghoon retorts
“Just wait for it.’’ Jay immediately shuts Sunghoon down before looking at Jake as if he’d been waiting for something.
“Have you seen the girls Yeonjun hangs out with?”
“And there it is.’’
“Is that all you think about?’’ Sunghoon rolls his eyes as Jake continues to go on about it.
“Look, all I'm saying is I don’t know how he does it but every girl I've seen him hang around is beautiful. If I'd known you’d be hanging around with them I'd have ditched Jay and his cousins to see the music teacher myself.”
“As if they’d have let you in.’’
“Well if you want to meet her that badly she’ll be back tomorrow, if Jay and his cousins are still down.’’
“I’ll let them know, we’ll be there.’’
-
This was the first time you’d be stepping foot back into the park residence in what felt like forever. You’d be happy to be getting back to some sense of normalcy or at least what you thought would be normalcy until the door swung open and you didn’t see Sunghoon or Yoari on the other side, but some guy you hadn't even known. You were more than sure he had to be one of Sunghoons friends. You vaguely remember him being one of the guys that stood with Sunghoon once the two of you had collided with each other, a day you cringed at any time you thought about it.
“Uhm’’
“Jake will you let the girl in and leave her alone.’’ Jay screams from the staircase, making your stomach twist in knots as you realize it wasn’t just Jake that was here.
“All i did was open the door?’’ just as quickly as he’d opened the door he’s snatched away and there stood Sunghoon.
“Sorry.’’ There was an underlying undertone to his voice that gave you the sense that the apology was for much more than just Jake, but you’d decided not to look too much into it. In all honesty his friends weren’t that bad. You'd gotten to know each of them, including Jay's cousins, and they’d all occasionally talk to you every now and then when you crossed paths in the hall or when they came down to retrieve something from the kitchen. Sunghoon on the other hand got a weird feeling any time he’d found you talking to one of them or Jake had attempted his not so subtle flirting here and there, but he tried his best to shake the feeling.
Eventually when they were all gone– as hard as Jake fought to stay and talk to you more, that left you and Sunghoon alone. Something the two of you had not been since the day he’d ignored you. He found you packing up your things getting ready to go when he stopped you.
“Can we talk?’’ Three words that for some reason made you absolutely nervous.
“I wanted to apologize?’’ His sudden apology makes your brows furrowed in confusion.
“I judged you too soon. I thought you’d be like them, like the others that go to chaconne, so I ignored you. I lumped you into a category i shouldn’t have because I didn’t know you.’’ Sunghoon couldn’t help but cringe at his own apology, saying it out loud he realized how stupid it may have sounded.
“Oh.’’ Your lack of words made his stomach sink, he wasn’t sure if he’d fucked up even more with the apology or if you just thought he’d sounded as stupid as he did.
“It’s okay, I get it. You’re forgiven Sunghoon’’
“You forgive me? Just like that?’’
“I mean yeah you were a jerk but I do understand that you're usually cold to everyone so I didn’t think much about it after a while.’’ Though he should be grateful you accepted his apology, something about your words stung, you thought he was cold?
“Once JurinJurina and Jiaqi explained it to me I no longer took it to heart. When I see how you interact with your sister and what you do for her I realized you're not just this big asshole or anything, I don’t know why you don’t really talk to anyone but I understand you have your own reasons.’’
“It’s because of Yoari.’’ He didn’t know why he felt the sudden need to spill his guts but the words spewed from his mouth before he could even register he’d said them
“What?’’
“The reason I don’t like talking to them. The reason I don’t trust anyone at Chaconne.’’
“It’s because of Yoari?” you’d tried your best to seem as if you understood but ultimately failed as Sunghoon saw right through you.
“Yoari used to be bullied, the kids at school bullied her because she was different. Because she didn’t act or dress the part of a rich family's daughter. You wouldn’t think young kids would be so stuck up and snarky, but then you go to enough parent teacher meetings and meet the older siblings or parents and you realize where they learned it all from.’’
“You lover her a lot don’t you…?’’ It was obvious to anyone that Sunghoon loved and cared for his sister and only wanted what was best for her. Though you yourself didn’t know what such a relationship was like you could understand his love for his younger sibling. He absolutely cherished her.
“There's nothing wrong with not trusting anyone Sunghoon, but you shouldn’t keep them all lumped into the same category. In all honesty I'm nothing like anyone there, not to sound cliche or too manic pixie dream girlish. I’m nothing like you or Jurin, or Jiaqi. I’m not even sure how I got into Chaconne but I know whatever my dad did to get me in he busted his ass to do it. I took this job with your sister because I could use the money, I'm not rich like the rest of you, never have been that well off. I’m just someone trying to make ends meet while attending a school I know will be good for my career in the future.”
“I don't know how much you trust me yet nor do i know if you’ve entirely warmed up to my being here, but i’d never hurt Yoari, Coming here and teaching her is always the highlight of my week. Seeing how she interacts with you and how much you smile and laugh around her is better that the money itself.’’ You weren't sure how you let that last part slip out but it had been too late to take it back. Though you yourself had felt an internal panic, Sunghoon felt a flutter in his chest at your words.
“She loves you. Yoari, she talks about you all the time, even when you're not here she's practicing and playing new things to show you when you come back.” Sunghoon tries his best to change the subject and move on, wanting to quickly dissolve the flutter in his chest.
“She’s absolutely adorable, i’m convinced she didn’t even need me since she’s damn near a pro.’’ Both you and Sunghoon laugh at your words. It was the first time you’d seen him fully let his guard down and laugh with you, something you’d find yourself hoping you’d see more of because without realizing you’d already found yourself wanting to be closer to him.
-
Your weeks had grown longer, long enough for you and Sunghoon to have gotten a little close and you’d stop by to see him and Yoari even on the days she hadn’t had any lessons. The two of them had become accustomed to you coming over by now, Yoari practically considering you more of a mother figure than her own mother as sad as that was but unfortunately her parents were never home. They hadn’t always been that way though, they had used to be a tight knit family until the money and the offers started flooding in, then they became less of a family more so now just strangers living in a house together.
Of course you realize the absence of their parents every time you’d come over, you only ever ran into them a handful of times, enough to have gotten to know a few things about them and finally put a face to the people that had hired you. Though you would never bring it up to Sunghoon or Yoari, having had a mother that was no longer part of your life you knew what it was like to feel the absence of a parent.
“Sunghoon! Are you done now you can’t have yn forever? I want to show her what I learned for my recital!”
“I thought you told her you wanted it to be a surprise?” Sunghoon responds, a look of pure amusement in his face as he recites his sister's words.
“But what if she gets sick again or she gets kidnapped by vampires or something.” Sunghoon forced back a laugh earning a glare of warning from you, making him clear his throat instead.
“Yoari no sickness or vampires could keep me away from your recital i'll be there. Promise.”
“You really promise?”
“Cross my heart and hope to die.” You put your pinky out at which Yoari smiles before locking her pinky with yours. The moment Yoari leaves the room Sunghoon is finally able to laugh at which you respond to by hitting him in the chest.
“Stop teasing her.”
“Vampires?”
“We watched the boy who cried werewolf together okay?” Sunghoon throws his hands up in defeat, a chuckle spilling from his lips once again at his sister's panicked monologue.
“You’ve never watched a movie with me?’’ Sunghoon jokes, but there was an underlying tone in his voice that gave away his true feelings.
“That’s funny cause I recall watching four disney movies with you when you and Yoari came over to my dorm.’’
“Last time I checked it wasn’t just the two of us that day you’re starting to make me think you only come here for my sister.’’
“Wellll.’’ At your response he scoffs and turns his head to look out the window, while he pretended to be hurt and offended as best as he could there was a hint of a smile on his face.
“How about Saturday then? They’re playing spirited away in theaters and it’s one of my favorites. I'd plan on going alone just to catch a break, but if you would like to join?’’ you weren’t sure what to expect from Sunghoon, there were often times where he’d let his guard around, but there were alos times where he hadn’t. You were never sure what to expect from him , but having gotten closer to him lately he had let his walls down just enough for you to have picked up on a few of his habits. The way his eyebrows would knit together when he was holding back his words or when he’d get confused. How his mind would drift off elsewhere and he’d stare into space when he was deep in thought, exactly like he’d been now. He’d taken so long just to think about it you started to regret asking, not expecting him to agree to actually being alone with you, but then he did.
“Yeah, Let’s go together. It sounds fun.’’
-
“You’re going on a date with Park Sunghoon?!”
“It’s not a date Jurin, we’re just going to see a movie?’’
“Alone? Without Yoari? Just the two of you? Together?’’
“Yes? I’m not understanding why that's such a big deal just two friends hanging out?’’
“A guy that didn’t talk to anyone other than Jake and Jay before you came here? Now he’s greeting me and Jiaqi in the hall, having conversations with Yeonjun and the guys, and going on movie dates? What kind of voodoo magic did you use on him for him to suddenly be interested in other people.’’
“Maybe he’s just decided that he can’t avoid people forever, there's only like 50 people at the school he’s going to have to get to know others eventually.’’
“You really don’t get it do you?’’ Jurin and jiaqi share a quick glance before looking back at you.
“Yn you have some sort of effect on him that I don’t know how to explain. Whatever relationship you two have, whether that be intimate or strictly platonic, he’s different than he was before. You weren’t here long enough to tell the difference but he’s not how he was before you started teaching his sister.’’
“He’s human guys, some people just change.’’
From the moment you’d been told to the moment you left your dorm you could only think about how hellbent Jurin was on proving to you that you’d somehow changed Sunghoon. You hadn’t known him long enough but in your eyes you felt they’d simply been overreacting. You had been completely lost in thought when Sunghoon arrived, honking his car horn to force you from your own overthinking and snap you back to reality.
“Not even gonna open the door for me?’’
“Will you get into the car.’’ You chuckle at Sunghoons mock frustration before slipping into the car and pulling on your seatbelt. For the most part the drive to the theater was full of comfortable silence. The sound of music playing silently in the background as a filler ambience.
By the time you’d arrived the theater had been bustling with families, couples and groups of friends all lined up waiting at the food courts or making their way to their destined theater.
You and Sunghoon on the other hand had made an immediate B line for the theater, having made the executive decision to get snacks beforehand, knowing that the theater snacks had definitely not been worth the price. By the time the two of you had settled into your seats and the lights dimmed in the theater there had only been a few of you settled in for the film.
Sunghoon found himself in a hard place tonight, rather than watching the movie he found his eyes drifting over to you and the way your eyes had been locked to the screen. He’d found himself admiring the way your eyes lit up at most of the scenes, how you smiled when your favorite character had shown up on screen, or the faint laugh that spilled from your lips as you covered your mouth not wanting to disturb others. He was starting to realize small details about you that he hadn’t before. The freckles scattered sporadically across your nose, the small dimple beside your lips when you smiled, the way your nose scrunched up unintentionally when you’d been overly focused or lost in thought. He was beginning to realize that he was completely fucked. He didn’t know when you became someone so important to him, important enough for him to be sitting here alone with you right now, something that he wouldn’t have done a month ago.
The only thing he wasn’t entirely sure about, was it such a bad thing to let someone else into his life? He’d spent so much of his life being cautious about who he hung around or who he’d introduced to his sister, yet you’d come into his life like a meteor striking the earth. You’d somehow found your way in and changed everything about himself he was completely sure he’d never change.
You on the other hand couldn’t seem to recognize that he’d been staring, so entranced by the movie you’d seen hundreds of times that you’d failed to realize he was completely taken by you in that moment.
For you the evening was absolutely perfect, despite neither of you having talked the entire time, you were simply just happy with watching a movie you’d loved with someone that had now become so special in your life.
“Ugh i absolutely love ghibli nights.’’ you rambled on about the movie and the other showings that would be happening the following week, and Sunghoon listened attentively, as if he’d miss an important detail if his mind drifted off for even a second.
“Do you want to go see the others?’’ The question had slipped from his mouth before he himself could even think it through.
“Really? You want to watch the others?’’
“If you want? Since you like them so much and i’ve never seen any of them.’’
“Should we bring Yoari next time.’’ Sunghoon felt every wall he’d built come crumbling down at the way you looked at him with your big doe eyes. He’d wanted to say no, that it should be just the two of you. He wanted to be selfish and tell you how he wished you could hang out just the two of you without his younger sister, but he just couldn’t bring himself to say it.
“She’d love that. Perfect opportunity for her to wear her dress she’s been begging mom and dad to let her wear out.’’
Eventually the two of you had arrived at the Park residence and Yoari was the first person to greet you, running into your arms with the enthusiasm of a golden retriever. Trailing not too far behind her was her mom who didn’t seem too happy.
“Yoari, Park we weren’t done talking.’’
“But yn is here?’’ Sunghoon glanced back and forth between his angry mother and Yoari who was now clinging to you as you held her in your arms.
“What’s going on?’’
“I’ve been trying to get her to practice for her recital for an hour now, but she refuses, she was supposed to be in her room but she heard the two of you come in and now she refuses to listen.’’ his mother babbles on angrily, meanwhile Sunghoon tries his best to calm her down.
“Ari, it’s not nice not listening to your mom, you know your recital is important you should have practiced.’’ You lightly scold her not missing the pout that forms on her face.
“Mom yells too much, I'd rather practice with you. I like it better when you’re here.’’ You’d completely seem to miss the way Ms. Park's eyes narrowed upon hearing her daughter favor you over her.
“Ari, I understand , but your mom just wants what's best for you, it may not be me you practice with but i’ll be proud either way.’’ you respond sweetly, brushing her hair back from her face, and the pout immediately lifts from her face.
“Really?’’
“Really. You’re amazing kiddo, but if you keep not listening to your mom i’ll have to make you practice 50 sheets instead of learning a song.’’
“No! I’ll listen I promise.’’
“That’s my girl, go apologize to your mom.’’ placing her on the floor you watch as Sunghoon steps to your side and Yoari runs over issuing a quick apology to her mom.
“Can I go play with yn now?’’ Her mother was left with no choice but to say yes, watching bitterly as the three of you made your way up the stairs not missing the banter between you, her youngest and her eldest son.
“What about me? How come you only want to be with yn?’’
“Because she plays dolls better than you.’’
“You heard her Park, you’re a terrible doll player.’’
“I am not?’’
“He used to make them wrestle.’’
Ms. Park's eyes trailed the three of you as you walked up the stairs and disappeared out of sight. It hadn’t gone unnoticed by her that the three of you were starting to spend an awful lot of time together. At first she had simply been happy that her kids were happy, but then they began to pay attention to her less and give you the attention she had lacked. She didn't realize it but it bothered her. A newly hired girl meant to be nothing more than her daughter's music teacher had turned into much more. Yoari only ever talked about you and her friends, she’d talked about you so often that one of the parents at Yoaris school had gotten you mixed up as her mother. She didn’t like how fast the three of you had gotten close and how much her daughter idolized you. She also didn’t miss how vibrant Sunghoon had become around you, usually he’d stay to himself in his room unless he was out with friends or spending time with Yoari, but even he was different. She absolutely envied the fact that a random girl could come into their lives and do all the things she’d been trying so hard to do with her family. Though she knew that firing you would only cause an even bigger ripple between the three of them than there already was.
After an hour of playing dolls with Yoari and then another thirty minutes of trying to get her to go to bed you and Sunghoon had been halfway out the door when Ms. Park called out to you, a sweet smile on her face in contrast to her very conniving train of thought.
“Yn sweetheart mind if we talk? I realize I haven’t taken much time to get to know you since you started working here.’’
“Oh? Um sure?’’ you share a glance with Sunghoon who simply shrugs as the two of you make your way into the kitchen.
“Have a seat, Hoon would you mind putting on the tea?’’ she asks Sunghoon to which he agrees before turning back to you.
Sunghoon wasn’t too sure what game his mom had been playing suddenly pulling you into the kitchen to “get to know you” but he could tell by her tone that she had been up to something. Her usual networking tone, the voice she used at work when she was negotiating or simply wanted to get information out of someone.
“So yn, tell me about anything important about you that you feel I should know.”
“Oh um okay?’’ you weren’t sure where the sudden interest in you had come from but you told her a few minor details about yourself, in all honesty as your boss and nothing more there wasn’t really much you felt the need to tell her.
“What about your parents? I’d love to meet them one day.’’ there it was, the one question that made your heart sink in your chest. There was a flicker of hesitation in your gaze, one that didn’t go unnoticed by either Sunghoon or his mom.
“Well, my dad owns a restaurant back home, he’s owned the place for six years now.”
“And he’s okay with you pursuing music so far away?’’
“He supports me a hundred percent, he always has. He worked so many late night and morning shifts just to buy me my first violin. Every recital or performance he has documented somewhere at home. Every song I've ever written he’s stored away. He always wanted me to pursue my dreams and be something greater than he and my mom were.’’
“And your mom? What about her.’’ the long awaited question you’d seen coming a mile away, but you had hoped she wouldn’t ask. You’d tried your best to control your expression but it was evident in the way your face contorted at the mention of your mom, that it was a touchy topic.
Sunghoon felt the atmosphere go tense and he thought back to one of the earlier nights when you’d first started teaching Yoari, the night you’d shut down at the mention of your family.
“Mom it’s getting late, I should get her back to the dorms before curfew.’’
“I guess you’re right, i’ve already pried too much.’’ she turns to look at you with an endearing smile. “Sorry for keeping you so long.’’
“Oh- no it’s okay Mrs. Park.’’ you respond, voice slightly shaky as you stand from your seat and Sunghoon makes his way to your side.
“Goodnight” you nod your head as a final goodbye before making your way towards the door. The entire drive back to your dorm was dead silent, but Sunghoon wouldn’t dare say a word.
🔖 @jwonistic @bubblytaetae @pkjay @heesallure @planetmarlowe @dreeki @butterflywonz @lillotus17 @squiishymeow @river-demon-slayer @sol3chu @st4rryst4r @firstclassjaylee @right-person-wrong-time @riribelle @gaytron3000 @heesunghooney @i03jae @blackhairandbangs @sunooqvrlsx @addictedtohobi @enaile23 @ivyvioletcarson @kristynaaah @starbyeol1512 @tinyteezer @jkslvsnella @brianashiftz @starbyeol1512 @miuwonis
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wynn-43 · 2 months ago
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the moments in between
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series masterlist
part 4 !!!!! bang chan x gn! reader wc: 3574 warnings: panic attack, in depth (ish) description of a trauma related panic attack, anxiety, physical touch, chris is a sweetheart as usual, lovely and fluffy, reader gets a miagrane, sleep issues, platonic (...?) affection, slight angst, complex emotions, they have abath together (with bathers on), adorable soft fluff :) a/n: sorry this took so long, lifes been hectic and i'm starting uni soon ive been busy lol
“Ooh that feels nice.” Chris mumbles as you gently stroke your fingers through his freshly washed hair.
“You like it?” You chuckle as you look down at where he’s situated on the floor in front of you.
“We need to do this more often.” Chris murmurs as he leans into your hands.
“Hold your horses. We haven’t even started.” You say, giggling as he whines when you move your hands.
“Okay so, once you're out, gently dry your hair with a towel.” You start, opening the tub next to you. “Microfibre, or anything generally soft is preferred.”
“Then, once it’s somewhat dry, you put in a leave-in conditioner.” You continue as you spread some leave-in-conditioner on your hands.
“You then apply it to your hair, you have to like, comb it through.” You murmur as you gently comb the product through his hair.
“Then…” You mumble as you pick up the bottle of gel, squeezing some onto your hands. “You put the gel on. And then you have to scrunch it.”
“Like this.” You say as you gently scrunch his hair, careful not to accidentally pull it. “Until your curls are more defined.”
“Then you scrunch it again with a t-shirt, or soft towel.” You hum, repeating the process with an old t-shirt.
“You can then let it air dry, or if you want more defined curls you can use a diffuser.” You finish, patting his shoulder to signal that you’re done.
He turns around, still on the floor but now facing you.
“As much as I appreciate you showing me, I will absolutely never be doing that.” He says sincerely and you groan.
“Chrissss! You have to take care of your hair!” You whine as he giggles.
“Can’t you just do it for me?” He gently rests his chin on your knee and you inhale sharply. 
“I won’t be here everyday.” You sigh, trying to ignore how your stomach somersaulted at the touch.
“Then move in with me or something!” He playfully whines, his words carrying a sense of unspoken sincerity as he presses his chin into your knee slightly.
“And give Mia more to gossip about?” You laugh as he groans.
“Let them gossip! We know we’re just friends! That's what's important.” He says as he looks up at you with pleading eyes and you try your best to ignore the sting of his words, choosing to unpack that later.
“I-” You start, looking down at his puppy-dog eyes. “I’ll think about it.”
He giggles cheerfully, sitting up on his knees to hug you and gently nuzzle his face into your stomach, making you giggle.
‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊✮‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊
The next few weeks flew by in a blur of persuasions and packing, and before you even processed that you agreed, you were sitting on the floor of your new room trying to construct a bookcase.
“I’m so glad you agreed to move in!” Chris chirped, his excitement infectious as he carried the final box inside.
“Still not sure how you convinced me.” You tease before scowling at the still-disassembled bookcase before you.
“Do you need help?” He asked, giggling at your growing frustration.
You turn to give him a petty glare, huffing as you turn back to the nonsensical instructions.
“Yes.” You concede, making him burst into laughter at your exasperation.
You roll your eyes at him and throw the instruction sheet in his general direction as he sits behind you.
He quickly looks over the sheet, immediately looking confused.
“Okay yeah, this doesn’t make sense.” He murmurs, looking between the sheet and the shelf.
“I KNOW RIGHT!” You exclaim as he tries to hold back a laugh.
“I vote, we use common sense and guess.” You say, on the verge of giving up.
He looks at you, humour and mirth evident in his eyes. “Okay, sure. You lead the way. But if it breaks, it’s not my fault.” 
You huff again as you stand up. “Let’s do this.”
“I can’t believe that worked.” Chris said an hour later.
“I know right!” You respond, proud of your handiwork.
“Do you want my help putting stuff away?” He asks, admiring the bookcase.
“Uhh… Can you help me put books away?” You ask, looking towards the 4 stacked boxes full of books.
“Yeah! Any particular order?” He asks, already turning to the boxes.
“Just by series or author.” You reply, turning to start to put away your clothes. 
“Let me know if you need help reaching the top.” You giggle as he gasps.
“Hey! I’m helping you here.” He scolds lightheartedly.
“Right, right, sorry.” You pause. 
“I’ll just get you a stepstool.” You say before erupting in a fit of giggles at his exasperated expression.
“Maybe I shouldn’t have let you move in…” He grumbles as he puts the books away.
‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊✮‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊
It had been a few months since you’d moved in with Chris and all was going well.
You sat on the couch reading a book when you heard the front door unlock. 
“Hey.” You murmur, looking up at Chris from your spot cuddled up on the couch.
“Hi.” He whispers tiredly as he puts his bag down and takes his shoes off.
“Long day?” You ask quietly as you put your book to the side.
“Yeah.” He mutters as he rubs his face.
“Anything I can do to help?” You ask softly as he walks over to you.
“Yeah, but I’m worried it’s weird.” He whispers as he sits on the other end of the couch.
“Hey, I won’t judge you. I promise.” You murmur as you offer him a soft smile.
“Can you just like…” He hesitates. 
“Hold me?” He whispers as he looks away.
“Of course.” You reply, holding your arms out for him to fall into.
You feel your heart flutter at the look of relief on his face as he snuggles against you, his face pressed against your stomach as you gently run your fingers through his hair.
“Do you wanna talk about it?” You murmur after holding him for sometime.
“I don’t think so.” He whispers in reply.
“If you ever want to, I’m here.” You mumble, continuing your gentle ministrations on his fluffy hair.
“Even if I cry?” He murmurs, his voice thick with emotion.
“Especially if you cry.” You respond and you swear you feel him breathe a sigh of relief.
‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊✮‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊
A few weeks later
You felt absolutely shattered, your eyes burned from the lack of sleep and your limbs were heavy with an ever-present ache. Once again, you struggled to sleep last night, the insomnia and nightmares winning out despite your many attempts to avoid them. Choosing to do something productive rather than wallow in your complicated emotions, you decided to make pancakes for you and Chris.
You were onto the final few pancakes when you heard someone softly padding into the kitchen.
“What’cha cooking?” Chris asks, his voice heavy with sleep as he came up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist, careful to avoid the hot pan.
“Pancakes.” You hum simply in response, focusing on the task at hand.
He nuzzles his nose into your shoulder as he slowly wakes up.
“This okay?” He mumbles against your shoulder.
You hum affirmatively, trying to maintain your focus.
“How’d you sleep?” He asks as he holds you close.
“Yeah, okay.” You murmur, the lie feeling thick in your throat. “How’d you sleep?”
“Fine, I actually fell asleep early for once.” He mutters as you flip the pancake.
“So like… what. 11:30?” You tease, allowing your attention to shift from the pancakes slightly.
“Heyy! You should be happy for me, you’re the one always telling me to sleep earlier.” He whines, trying to hide his giggles.
“Fine, fine. I’m glad you slept well.” You hum, moving one hand to squeeze his hand where it wrapped around your waist.
He nestles his face in the crook of your neck and you freeze, your stomach turning uncomfortably and nausea rising in your throat.
He pulls back immediately upon noticing your discomfort.
“Not okay?” He gently asks, removing his hands from around your waist and despite the chaos in your mind you mourn the loss of his body against yours.
You can hear your heart race as you lean to turn the stove off, each echoing beat spiking your anxiety as your thoughts spiral.
“Uh. No sorry.” You mutter, trying to ignore the familiar sensation of your breath catching in your throat.
“Hey, hey. It’s okay, don’t apologise.” Chris whispers as he notices the tears in your eyes. “Can I touch you?”
You nod hesitantly and as soon as he pulls you close, tears begin spilling down your face as you see memories of them flickering in your mind.
“You don’t need to apologise, it's okay.” He murmurs, gently tracing invisible circles along your back.
“You’re allowed to have boundaries, and I’m sorry for crossing them.” He affirms as the invisible circles he’s tracing turn into little stars and hearts.
“Thank you for telling me, I’m really proud of you.” He affirms, gently pulling you back to wipe the tears from your eyes.
“You are so strong. And incredible. You deserve the world.” He pulls you back into his chest, holding you close as you bawl into his shoulder.
“Do you want to go sit on the couch?” He gently asks after some time, when your sobs had eventually turned into hiccups.
You shake your head, sniffling as you pull back and wipe your eyes.
“Thank you.” You murmur before turning towards the stove where the half-finished pancake lays. “But there’s still one more pancake.”
He pulls you back into his chest, resting his face in your hair as he holds you close.
“We have enough pancakes. Do you want to go set the table? I’ll clean this for you.” Chris murmurs softly before gently guiding you away by the waist.
You simply hum in response, too emotionally exhausted to say more, before going to set the table.
Chris appears at the table minutes later, bearing two plates of pancakes, one lovingly decorated with your favourite toppings.
“You okay?” He asks softly as he places the plate down in front of you.
You nod, scared that speaking will release the floodgates of your emotional turmoil.
“I’m really sorry. I should’ve remembered that you don’t like neck stuff.” He mumbles as he sits beside you.
“No, it’s not your fault.” You start, hoping that your voice sounded stable. “I overreacted. I'm sorry.”
“You didn’t overreact. You’re allowed to have emotions.” Chris states as you busy yourself with your pancakes in an effort to distract yourself from your overwhelming emotions.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” He asks softly a few minutes later, and the concern in his voice sends a pang to your stomach.
“Yeah, just tired. I haven’t been sleeping well.” You mutter, trying to ignore the nausea in your stomach.
“Oh, I get that. Do you want to talk about it?” He gently enquires as he starts to eat his pancakes.
“Um. I don’t know.” You reply, unsure.
“No pressure. But I’m here if you want to talk.” He murmurs, gently nudging his knee against yours, making you giggle.
“Uh.” You start after the two of you sit in silence for a while. “I just keep getting nightmares, and it takes me ages to get to sleep.”
“Wanna cuddle?” He asks, somewhat jokingly and you almost choke on your pancakes.
“Oh my god. Please don’t die.” He says, patting your back as you recover.
“We don’t have to. But if you think it might help, it could be worth a shot.” He murmurs as you consider his proposition.
“Okay.” You reply, desperate to try anything.
“Really?” Chris exclaims excitedly and you laugh before collecting your plate and putting it at the sink.
“Now?” He asks, immediately standing behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist.
“Sure.” You hum, and you're caught off guard when he picks you up, carrying you to his bedroom.
“Chris!” You scream before the two of you erupt into giggles.
“Cuddle time!” He exclaims before dropping you on the bed, immediately shuffling in behind you.
He immediately pulls you to his chest, wrapping his around your stomach and pressing his face into your hair.
“This okay?” He asks gently as he holds you close.
“Uh, yes but-” You begin as you turn around, shifting so that you’re facing him.
“Hi.” You whisper, caught off guard by how close your faces are.
“Hi.” He whispers in response, and you swear you see his eyes flick to your lips for a second.
“Can I uh- lay on your chest? Heartbeats make me uh, calmer.” You mumble, struggling to avoid making eye contact with how close your faces are.
“Of course.” He murmurs back, smiling as he shuffles to lay on his back, allowing you to shift yourself into a more comfortable position.
“Thank you.” You mumble, immediately feeling sleepy once you rested your head on his chest.
“Always.” He murmurs, softly brushing the hair off your face before pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. “This okay?”
You hum and nod, trying to ignore the swirl of emotions in your stomach as your heart rate quickens- grateful that you were listening to his heart and not the reverse.
The two of you lie there for a while, you listening to the gentle thump of his heartbeat as he softly runs his fingers through your hair.
“I still can’t sleep.” You mumble sometime later. “Like I’m sleepy, but I can’t sleep.”
“Do you want me to sing to you?” He whispers. “Didn’t you say that gentle touches on your arm makes you sleepy? I can do that.”
You hum in consideration, too exhausted to be flustered by his sweetness. “Yeah, like gently tracing on my arm.”
“Like this?” He mumbles before gently running the tips of his fingers down your arm.
You nod, already feeling sleepier.
“Want me to sing too?” He asks gently and you hum in response.
He starts softly singing one of your favourite songs as he continues his gentle tracing on your arm. You feel yourself slowly drift to sleep, encased in a soft blanket of his affection, as well as the comfort and safety he brings you.
Later, a while after your breathing evens out and he hears your soft snores, Chris stops his soft singing and gentle tracing, instead pressing a soft kiss to your hair and looking down at your sleeping face.
“Love you bug.” He murmurs before closing his eyes as your soft snores lull him to sleep.
‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊✮‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊
You could vaguely hear Chris’s soft footsteps as he tiptoed into the room.
“Hey love. You okay?” He asked softly, sitting down next to where you laid on the bed.
“Yeah.” You mumble out, voice hoarse from your medicine-induced nap. “My head hurts less.”
“I’m glad.” He hums, brushing your hair out of your face and looking down at you sweetly.
“I need to shower.” You murmur, trying to sit up before you're interrupted by a sharp pain in your head.
“Woah, woah. Take it easy.” Chris mumbles as he helps you sit up. “Is that a good idea?”
“Probably not. But I didn’t yesterday, and I need to wash my hair.” You whisper, blinking to try and wake up fully..
“Do you want me to help?” He gently asks and you hum noncommittally. 
“Whilst I appreciate the thought, I don’t think I feel comfortable with you seeing me naked, let alone touching me naked.” You whisper, the mixture of pain and exhaustion making you too honest for your own good.
“We can wear bathers.” He murmurs and you look up to see that beautiful, genuine smile on his face.
“I- yeah. That would work.” You mumble, glad that the room was still dark and that he therefore couldn’t see you blushing.
“Shower or bath?” He asks, gently rubbing a soft circle on your hand with his thumb.
“Bath… Please.” You murmur as he smiles at you, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead.
“Do you want me to leave you to get changed whilst I run the bath?” You nod in response, rubbing the sleep out of your eyes and standing as he runs off.
10 minutes later, you walk into the bathroom, immediately surprised by the ambiance in the room.
“I put candles up so that the lighting wasn’t too bright.” Chris whispers from behind you, startling you.
You turn around, shocked to find him shirtless in swim trunks.
“Do you want me to wear a top?” He asks, stepping back.
“No, it’s fine. I just forget how buff you are.” You murmur, admiring his physique as he blushes.
“Oh hush, get in the bath.” He shushes as you giggle at his fluster.
You sit down in the bath, sighing at the warmth.
“Is the temperature good?” Chris asks from beside you.
You nod, humming contently as you feel your headache relax again.
“Okay, how are we going to do this?” He asks gently, as you sit there with your eyes closed.
“Can you just help me wash my hair?” You murmur, squinting your eyes open slightly.
“Yeah, of course. Where are your products?” He asks, looking around.
“Just there, would it be easier if you got in with me?” You ask gently, grateful for his decision with the lighting as you open your eyes.
He freezes, inwardly glad he chose warm lighting so his blush was less obvious.
“Are you okay with that?” He asks, distracting himself with gathering the products.
“Yeah.” You hum, trying to remain nonchalant about the intimacy of the situation.
“Okay.” He says as he places the items on the shelf next to the bath.
He then gently slides in behind you, and you situate yourself so you're sitting in between his legs.
“This okay?” He asks once the two of you are comfortable.
You nod, untrusting of your voice's ability to mask your fluster.
“Okay, so what do I have to do?” He asks, picking up the bottles from the floor.
You slowly guide him through each of the steps, explaining each part of the process.
“Then I do stuff after but I can do that myself.” You finish as he hums.
“You sure?” He asks, whispering so as to not aggravate your aching head. “I’m happy to help.”
“Uh, sure. If it’s not too much trouble.” You murmur, trying to ignore the odd fluttering of your heart.
“You’re never too much trouble.” He hums as he starts to lather the shampoo on your hair.
“Thank you.” You mutter, glad he was behind you and unable to see your flushed face.
“That better?” He murmurs after he washed the conditioner out of your hair.
You hum sleepily, the ambiance of the soft light of the candles and the gentle trickling of water combining with Chris’ gentle washing of your hair lulling you into a blissful state. 
“Don’t fall asleep just yet.” He whispers gently as he cradles you against his chest. “Almost done, then you can go to sleep.”
The gentleness in his tone makes your heart ache ever-so-slightly and the shift in positions rouses you from your trance.
“Okay.” You hum before moving to get out of the water.
“Wait, let me get out first.” Chris says, steadying you before he stands.
He wraps his towel around his waist before he carefully helps you exit the bath.
He gently wraps your towel around you before sitting you down on the stool next to the vanity.
“Now, how do I do this?” He asks once you're situated.
“Just a leave-in-conditioner. It’s in the bottom drawer.” You say, trying to ignore the chill biting at your legs as he leans down and grabs the container.
“This is how you always smell so nice!” He murmurs upon opening it, making you giggle.
“Do you remember how to do this?” You ask, looking up at him.
“Yep.” He responds before gently brushing the product through your hair.
“Okay done! Did I do it right?” He asks as he puts it away.
“Yes, you did.” You reply, giggling slightly.
“Great! Okay let’s get you back to your room.” He murmurs as helps you stand up.
Later, once the two of you have changed out of your pyjamas and you’re snuggled up in your bed, Chris comes to check on you.
“Need anything?” He asks, standing beside your bed.
“Uhh… I think I’m good, thanks.” You murmur as you slowly feel yourself getting sleepier.
“Okay, feel free to call me if you need anything.” He whispers as he presses a soft kiss to your forehead. As his lips gently brushed your forehead you feel your face warm with a deep flush, grateful to the shadows of the room for concealing it.
He began to walk towards the door, careful not to make too much noise.
“Wait.” You whisper as you hesitate, your heart pounding at the thought of asking for more from him.
He turns, looking concerned.
“You okay?” He asks warmly.
“Yeah, just uh…” You mumble, flustered.
“Can you hold me?” You ask in a whisper.
He simply smiles, moving towards the bed and slipping under the covers, gently wrapping his muscular arm around your waist, holding you tight.
“Always.” He whispers, pressing a soft kiss to your hair.
This is a work of fiction, based entirely on my personal perception of him, and does not reflect his actual character or actions.
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sneakyparsnipslicer · 1 year ago
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Power Play
It was never meant to have happened, but in all fairness I'm glad it did. I do have an unspoken duty of care after all.
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I'm Gavin, 22, studying at Uni for theatre. Friends have always said I've got an uncanny talent for acting, able to hide how I'm feeling, telling the most convincing lies, but despite that I do have an earnest care for my friends and for some that's a big deal.
So, it all happened one Friday night, some of the girl friends were hosting a house party. Alcohol, music, conversation, the usual. My friend Janice had asked if I was free earlier and invited me. I hadn't seen her all week so the chance to catch up is always welcome. I put on my best clothes and headed off to the house which thankfully wasn't too far from my own place. I brought along some Amaretto for the party and got to mingling with others. I arrived quite early so there weren't too many people around and I got the chance to meet the partygoers and meet up with Janice.
'Hey Gav, glad you could make it! Got some pretty big news!' whispered Janice excitedly in my ear.
'Really? What is it?' I asked eagerly. She waved her left hand in front of my face, a gold ring on her finger. My jaw dropped.
'Tina proposed to me, we're getting married in the New Year!' she cried. I smiled and hugged her. Tina was a friend of ours and had confided to me in secrecy that she had a crush on Janice, and over the space of a year it looks like they'd both hit it off really well.
'Congrats, that's awesome!' I cried. 'Is Teen here tonight?'.
'Yeah she's just over in the other room, I'll go get her' said Janice, and she made her way through to the kitchen. I sat down on the sofa and waited a while. More and more partygoers arrived and as the night went on I forgot about Janice and Tina.
Getting progressively tipsy and humming along to 'Tainted Love', someone slumped down on the sofa next to me.
'Fuck them lesbians' sighed a voice. I opened my eyes and looked to my right, there sat a guy that looked about 30 with a bottle of Budweiser in his hand, shaking his head.
'What's up?' I asked, looking to him in concern. The guy looked to me and shrugged.
'Same fucking story everywhere I go, I see a cute girl, magically they're gay. Swear every fucker's gay these days' he said, taking a sip of his drink. I didn't say anything, took a sip of my drink and looked across the room. I could see past the crowd by the doorway was Janice. She was consoling Tina, who was crying. We caught eachother's eyes and I tilted my head subtly to the guy next to me, she nodded and kissed Tina on the head. I understood the situation.
'So how about you my man? You smashing some puss tonight?' the guy asked, looking me up and down. I turned to him and smiled.
'Nah mate, I'm more for the buss!' I replied, winking. The guy almost spat his drink out.
'Fuck off mate, you ain't gay!' he said laughing. I sighed.
'Oh sorry, were you expecting something more like this?' I asked, dangling my wrist and swiping the air camply. He laughed again, looking at me in disbelief.
'For a moment there I could've sworn you were straight' he said.
'Well you know, not all of us act camp, I like what I like but keep it on the down low' I replied, to which he nodded. I felt like I needed to move this along.
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'Say, do you work out?' I asked, looking to his arms. He looked and flexed his right arm.
'Ah, you like what you see?' he asked smugly, grinning. I nodded and took another sip of my drink. He chuckled softly.
'You know, I've never tried a guy before' he said quietly, leaning in a little closer.
'Might be your lucky night' I suggested. He started nodding and bit his lower lip, taking a good look at me. I could have cackled at how easy it was to get him invested.
'What do you say we go find somewhere quiet to… break some new ground?' he asked, chuckling. I could have suplexed myself from the eye roll I wanted to do, but I had to keep my composure and giggled.
'Well, my place is just down the road, should give us a chance to get to know eachother better' I smiled. He drank the last of his drink and stood up. I happened to catch sight of his bulge as he offered a hand to lift me up, predictable. I tenderly placed my hand in his and he hoisted me up onto my feet, grinning.
'Let's get going then!' he said, heading off out of the house. I followed behind him, giving Janice a quick thumbs up and a wink as she nodded understandingly, mouthing the words 'Thank you'.
We returned to my place, him squeezing my ass and getting excited all the while. I unlocked the front door and invited him in. As soon as I was done locking the door, he made his move, pinning me to the door and burying his nose in my shoulder blade, taking a deep sniff.
'Mmm, you smell good!' he said. I rolled my eyes.
'It's Playboy' I said passively. He pulled his nose out.
'That's what I'll call you! Playboy!' he said, smiling maniacally.
'Sure thing, umm' I said, looking to him for a name.
'Just call me Daddy you cocksucking bitch!' he growled, pinning me further into the door and kissing my neck. Daddy, how fucking predictable. I could just see how this was going to go down. He pulled away and exhaled, stroking my chest.
'I'll bet you're a right little slut aren't you, Playboy?' he asked, fiddling with my shirt buttons, slowly revealing my chest.
'Oh for sure!' I grinned, moving in to kiss him. He hesitated but proceeded to kiss me back. I moved my hands behind his shoulders, embracing him. I could feel his dick pressing against my leg, he was totally enjoying it.
'Fuck me!' he said, dazed.
'Don't you mean fuck ME, Daddy?' I asked. He started laughing and moved his hands down to my thighs.
'Didn't think I'd ever be doing this with a guy, it feels so good' he said, looking into my eyes, amazed.
'Well, let's enjoy this then' I said, taking him by the hands and guiding him to my bedroom.
We got into the room and he thrust me down on the bed, biting his lip.
'Alright, strip down Playboy, nice and slow' he said, stroking his own crotch. I sat smirking as I kicked off my shoes and undid the last buttons on my shirt, taking it off and throwing it away. I went to unbuckle my belt when he stopped me.
'Come over here, I wanna try something' he said. Walking over he turned me around and began to unbuckle my belt whilst his cock was grinding against my butt. Always so cute when first timers try to be all freaky.
'You like that?' he asked, resting his chin on my left shoulder, watching as he pulled my shorts down.
'Yes Daddy' I said breathily, trying not to laugh. He dropped my shorts and began rubbing my butt through my boxers with his hands.
'Oh that ass feels so good Playboy, can't wait to explore it!' he whispered.
'I sure hope Daddy's packing tonight' I replied. With that he turned me back to face him, pulled me into a passionate kiss and carried me over to the bed, laying me down on it. Getting on top of me, he looked down as I looked back up at him. I began to pull at his shirt and he took it off, revealing his muscular chest, I'll admit it wasn't half bad. Then I began to unbuckle his belt and pull his jeans down, which he kicked off and there we were on the bed in our boxers.
'Open Daddy's pants!' he ordered, and I nodded, slipping them down his thighs. His dick sprung free, big and girthy, just how I like them.
'Ooooh, Daddy's got a big one!' I remarked in surprise, looking at it. He placed a hand under my chin, lifting it up to face him.
'Suck it, Playboy' he said, and so I began to do so, placing it in my mouth and beginning the blowjob. As it went on, his face became more strained as he tried not to shoot his load.
'Shit, you're good!' he moaned, looking to the ceiling. Eventually he stopped me and turned me over, pulling my boxers down.
'Alright Playboy, going in!' he chuckled. I could have cackled there and then, but I had to withold on the irony of that line. He began to spread my ass cheeks and inserted the tip of his dick, which slipped in easily. Even he was shocked.
'Damn, I thought you'd be tighter!' he said.
'C'mon Daddy, I'm a whore remember? Don't ruin this for yourself' I replied, massaging his leg. He nodded and continued to ride my backside, shaking the bed doing so. I'll admit this guy fucked with feeling, and as it went on and he reached climax, he wasn't aware of what else was going on.
When he finally came, sweaty and panting, he whooped in amazement.
'Wow Playboy, that was amazing!' he laughed, pulling himself away, but he soon realised he couldn't remove his dick from my ass.
'What's the matter Daddy? Too balls deep in me to let go?' I asked, turning my head to look at him. To his horror, his hands were beginning to sink slowly into my back, his pelvic region already sunk furthest into mine, and our feet had merged.
'Yo, what the fuck's going on?!' he shouted, but he couldn't pull himself free, he continued to sink into me as I began to cackle.
'You just fucked your way into a whole lot of trouble my guy!' I replied, laughing as he struggled.
'Let me go you fucking freak!' he roared as our legs were fully joined and his arms had sunk in.
'You upset my friends tonight, 'Daddy'. The lesbians you were moaning about, they just got engaged and you just had to come along and ruin their day' I said coldly as his back and shoulders sank in, him yelling out for help.
'And for the record, the name's Gavin. Suits me well considering how many homophobic, misogynistic pricks like you I've been gathering up to stop my friends being harrassed' I explained. By now the guy's face had melted into the back of my head and his screams became more and more muffled. Eventually he was fully sunk inside me, his added mass stretching me out and I began jerking my own dick, getting off my bed and spunking a few heavy loads on the carpet, excising myself of him. I looked at the pool of cum as it began to dry into the carpet.
'That's all you ever were, just a stain on society's carpet. Thanks for the muscles though' I said, cracking my neck and massaging my new musculature, reaching for my clothes. Though I thought to slip on the guy's jeans, they fitted me pretty nicely.
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Making my way back over to Janice's place, most of the partygoers were filling out of the house. I went back in and found Tina and Janice, their faces lit up.
'Gav! Did you take care of that bastard?' asked Janice hopefully.
'Hey, I'm wearing his jeans aren't I?' I asked, turning to show them off 'Plus he filled me out a bit'. Janice shook her head, but smiled.
'I don't know how you do it, but thank you' said Tina, bowing her head. I pulled them both into a hug.
'Forget about him, he won't be bothering anyone anymore. Nobody messes with my friends' I said, looking to them in admiration.
'You're definitely gonna be the Best Man at the wedding, you know that right?' asked Janice. I folded my arms and rolled my eyes.
'And here I was hoping to be Chief Bridesmaid, oh well!' I sighed, shrugging. Janice and Tina began chuckling as I turned my attention to cleaning up the empty bottles and beer cans that the guests had left.
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httpsdana · 2 months ago
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i’ve read the post saying you want new names and diferent prompts besides de lazy morning ones so i came to say jealous balde, that’s the only thing on my mind, it doesn’t matter the prompt or anything just jealous and protective balde
Art Class ~ Alejandro Balde
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・❥・prompt list
・❥・masterlist -> part 2
・❥・who I write for
・❥・a/n: sorry for not posting much uni has been stressful. a Marc Casado fic is gonna be written soon <3
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“Art class?” Alejandro raised an eyebrow. “Since when do you love art?”
She shrugged, a smile spreading across her face.
“I thought I could learn something new,” she said, making him chuckle.
“I’d love to see how that goes,” he teased, prompting her to punch his shoulder playfully.
“Oh, shut up. I'm totally gonna slay that,” she said confidently, making him hum in mock agreement.
“I’m sure you will, cariño.”
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“How was your first class?” Alejandro asked when his girlfriend stepped into the house.
“It was amazing. I even made new friends,” she said, her smile lighting up her face.
Alejandro smiled, brushing a strand of hair away from her face.
“Did you? Tell me about them,” he urged, his hand gently cupping her cheek.
“Well, first of all, there’s this guy-”
“A guy?” he interrupted, his eyebrows furrowing.
“Yes, a guy. His name is Sergi. He’s been taking art for a while, and he’s really good,” she said casually, not noticing the jealousy flickering in his eyes.
“Is he now?” Alejandro said, his jaw clenching ever so slightly.
“Yeah. He even suggested helping me after classes if I wanted to,” she nodded, walking into her room with her boyfriend trailing behind her.
“And what did you tell him?” he asked curiously, watching her every move as she replaced her shirt with one of his hoodies.
“Nothing,” she shrugged, dropping onto the bed with a sigh. Alejandro was about to protest, but she cut him off.
“Are you gonna keep asking questions, or are you gonna cuddle me now?” she asked with a pout, still blissfully unaware of the jealousy flaring within him.
His frown softened slightly before he joined her on the bed, pulling her closer until her head rested comfortably on his chest.
After laying in silence for a while, Alejandro spoke up again.
“So…this guy Sergi,” he started, making y/n chuckle.
“What about him?” she asked, finally catching onto his jealous tone.
“Is he hot?” he asked, his tone dead serious.
“Hot?” she repeated, laughing.
“Yes. Is he?” he asked, more seriously this time.
She decided to tease him, enjoying this side of him.
“I mean…he’s alright,” she shrugged, making Alejandro sit up quickly.
“Alright? So he’s hot?” he repeated, his expression a mix of disbelief and annoyance.
“Yeah, I guess. But you’re still hotter than him, definitely,” she teased, earning an eye roll from him.
“Yeah, whatever,” he muttered, getting up and walking out of the room.
She shook her head, following him into the kitchen, unable to stop smiling.
“Ale,” she said softly, stepping closer to where he stood drinking water.
He hummed but didn’t turn to look at her.
“Alejandro,” she repeated, moving closer still.
“Sí?” he murmured, still avoiding her gaze.
She reached for his shoulder, gently spinning him around.
“Are you jealous?” she asked, her hands wrapping around his neck.
He huffed and rolled his eyes, but his hands instinctively rested on her hips.
“Of who? Sergi? I know you’re mine, and you know that too,” he said, his eyes flicking between hers and her lips.
“I was thinking about accepting his offer,” she said nonchalantly, making his grip tighten. “You know, like him helping me because he’s really good.”
“Shut up,” he muttered, leaning down to press his lips against hers, cutting her off mid-sentence.
Before she had the chance to kiss him back, he pulled away.
“I bet I’m better than him at drawing anyway,” he murmured against her lips, his warm breath brushing her face.
“Mhm, I doubt that,” she whispered, making him chuckle.
“When’s your next class?” he asked casually, raising an eyebrow.
“In two days, at 3,” she replied, curious about where he was going with this.
“Great. I’ll pick you up, and we can go,” he said, earning a laugh from her.
“We?” she said through giggles. “Since when do you care about art?”
“Since my girl started taking classes with a guy who seems extra friendly,” he said, sarcasm lacing his tone.
“I love this jealous side of you, you know?” she said, stepping closer, her hands pressing gently against his chest.
“Yeah, don’t get used to it, princesa,” he teased, his lips curling into a playful smile, though a hint of jealousy still lingered in his eyes.
“I think I already did,” she pouted, making him shake his head with a chuckle.
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my taglist: @barcapix @paucubarsisimp @spidybaby @mxryxmfooty @n0vazsq @joaosnovia @ilovebarcaaaa @f1lover55 @jajajhaahaha (lmk if you want to be added!!)
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sirhamburrger · 3 months ago
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chihiro (k. yukimiya x f!photographer!reader) when i come back around will i know what to say? // not today, maybe tomorrow
in which kenyu just can't seem to muster up the courage for a proper goodbye. wc: 743 || cw: light angst, yukimiya is afraid of rejection, lowkey you are too, there will be a part two to this because like cmon there has to be || header from bllk light novel || dividers from @saradika-graphics
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kenyu doesn't know how he's going to break the news to you.
after all, how does one masterfully announce to one's best friend that they're leaving for a live-in football training program lasting approximately nine months, starting tomorrow? and then tell said best friend that he's been in love with her since the first day of middle school?
it's simply not done.
so he keeps his mona lisa smile on, muscles aching, as you're guided to snap photos of him from every angle. you always tell him seeing people take close-ups of your best friend is a little weird, but you seem to be having a lot of fun doing it yourself. too much fun, in fact. he fights the urge to break into a grin despite himself.
“okay, that's a wrap for today!” the shoot director calls out after what seems like an eternity. “see you all next time.”
kenyu stretches his sore limbs, letting out a quiet sigh of relief as all the staff members go around saying their ‘good work today’s. but he doesn't feel the usual post-shoot euphoria. this is his final shoot with you, and possibly the last time you will ever see each other.
“hey, ken?”
he jogs over to where you're sitting before your computer, tongue poking out cutely. smiling softly, you gesture for him to take a seat beside you, then turn back to the screen. “look at these pics of you! they're the best ones yet.” 
and they are. the lighting is perfect, as are the focus and contrast, bringing out the subtle charm his fans love so much.
“you really know just how to make me look good, huh." he chuckles, crossing his arms. "i'm glad they let you take the wheel on this one.”
“you'd think that they'd never let a photog intern actually do any of the fun stuff, right?” you say almost breathlessly, strangely, as you begin to upload the photos to a hard drive. “but i told them this was my last shoot with you, so maybe that's why-”
wait. what?
how do you already know about his leaving for blue lock?
“look, i… i'm sorry i didn't tell you earlier.” you look back up at him, and he thinks he sees tears glistening in your eyes. 
what the heck is going on?
“i didn't want it to affect whatever you have going on right now. you're so successful and happy. but it's a really good opportunity for me. y'know, for my portfolio and all. job experience, too.”
his mouth goes dry.
“how long is this... thing going to be for?”
“nine months or so. i'm only coming back to school for uni entrance exams. other than that, all my school stuff is going to be remote.” you let out a shaky breath, clenching your fists on the table. “which means - i won't be able to see you for a really long time. i leave tomorrow.”
kenyu feels a lot of things in this moment. happy for you. broken-hearted that you're leaving. but most of all?
he feels like a total coward for not telling you first, so you wouldn't have to feel so bad about it.
“we'll keep in touch, though, right?” he takes your hand in his, holding back tears of his own. “this isn't going to affect us. i won't let it.”
“yeah.” you give him a sad, watery smile. “i suppose so.”
your phone rings, and you tear your gaze from his face.
“i should go.”
“okay.”
he watches you silently as you pack up and walk towards the exit, watches you wipe the tears from your cheeks - and he knows now is his last chance.
“wait!”
you turn around, red-rimmed eyes wide -
“i love you.”
a beat passes between you. then another. and yet another. then you're running towards him, and for a moment he thinks you're going to wrap your arms around his neck and press your lips to his and oh gosh he's not ready for this but he's more ready than he's ever been in his life -
but you don't.
you squeeze the life out of him, but you don't kiss him.
his heart sinks.
"love you too, ken."
and even if those words are kind of what he's always wanted to hear from you, they really aren't. because you just don't mean them in the way he so desperately wants you to.
oh, he really feels like a coward now.
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bllk masterlist || general masterlist
© sirhamburrger 2024
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thebibliosphere · 2 years ago
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Hi there, ive come from your post about ADHD and emotional disregulation, firstly thank you so much for putting it into words, its such a complicated part of how i deal with emotions and i havent ever been able to articulate how to why.
Secondly, in that post you mentioned how you've used stress as a motivator and how eventually your stress regualtion broke, i was wondering if you'd be willing to talk about that? (If not, its not a problem)
I feel like the same thing has happened to me but until i read your post i had no idea that something had... snapped? I suppose? I struggle with motivation all the time and in the past id have a week or a few days left and id be able to suddently push myself very hard to complete whatever it is before the deadline, just barely making it in most cases. However now it seems that i can't find that motivation anymore, deadlines come and pass and i can't being myself to work on anything, and i just end up spiralling into shame and guilt. That motivation was the only thing that I was able to rely on sometimes for things like uni, and i conviced myself that it was just me growing lazy or trying to get out of responsibility as to why the "last minute panic-mode" doesnt work anymore.
Again, if you don't wanna tackle this can of worms or if it's something youd rather not post online i totally get it, its no biggie! thanks so much for making the original post as well, it means a lot
Hello friend, thanks for the message. I'm sorry you're also dealing with this.
The good news here is that I've already talked about this using the rubber band analogy my therapist gave me. (Stress is like a Rubber Band)
If you don't have the mental bandwidth to read all of it now, the tl;dr is "stress is like a rubber band; it can stretch to hold numerous things in place when you need to, but if you do it too often or keep adding more and more strain under the band, the elastic eventually becomes brittle and snaps, taking your mental and sometimes physical health with it too."
I've been in intensive therapy for this for roughly three years now, and trying to piece my brain back together after my last bout of stress-induced productivity gave me a total mental breakdown.
It's... odd not being able to use stress and having to actively avoid it to avoid a relapse. But it is doable. Medication would help, but alas, I've got weird health issues and am unmedicated at the minute.
(And just in case that sparks anyone to go, "Oh, you do all this unmedicated! Wow, that's so inspiring!" as sometimes parents do to me on here as they then tell me they don't want to medicate their kids, I've unfortunately also written a post about what that kind of success looks like from an unmedicated perspective and the kind of suicidal ideation I deal with on the regular because I cannot take meds. It is not pleasant reading, but it is necessary for some folks, specifically anti-med, "if you just tried harder" people.)
A book you may find helpful is Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle, by Emily and Amelia Nagoski. It was very validating for me to read about other people going through the same things, and made me feel less of a "this is a personal failing on my part" and more of a "Oh okay yeah, no stress literally breaks people."
It helped soothe some of my own internalized "I just need to try harder" and helped cement me on the path I was already going down with my ADHD therapist toward changing how I view myself and how I manage my ADHD.
I hope that helps! If you've got more specific questions or I didn't touch on something in my old post, I can try to answer them :)
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ichorai · 1 year ago
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hell, yeah ; roman roy ; part six.
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pairing ; roman roy x f!reader
synopsis ; pain was an old friend for the both of you.
words ; 13.8k
themes ; angst, fluff, drama, slowburn, childhood friends to lovers
warnings / includes ; depictions of mental and physical abuse, major character death, heavy angsty shit, sexual jokes and general foul language, business talk, roman is so in love, connor gets a bit of spotlight for this chapter </3
a/n ; sorry i'm taking so so so long w this series! uni keeps getting in the way of my writing HAHA but i hope you guys enjoy :)
series masterlist. main masterlist.
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Bidding wars had never really been fun for you. It was always emails upon emails, calls after calls, Logan yelling, Gerri scrambling, negotiations, bargains, deals—it was all too much.
But this… even you had to admit, this was fun. 
Maybe because it was the first time you were working against Logan and not for him. And being around the Roy siblings reminded you of your childhood—a time where the four of you got along for the most part, even with the bloody noses and scraped knees and the yankings of hair.
Buying Pierce had been something you were starkly against while you were working in Waystar, but with this new thing that the Roy siblings were crafting, you had complete faith that Shiv, Kendall—hell, even Roman, would keep the news station’s values in check.
And, though you weren’t entirely proud of it, there was a thrill, a rush of adrenaline, when the four of you raised your bidding price to a healthy ten billion as a closing offer, knowing there was no way Logan could ever consider outbidding that.
Nan Pierce accepted with little pushback, much to Logan’s fury.
Your godfather yelled at the four of you through the phone later that day, but there was no fear sitting within your stomach, like there usually was when he got angry. No, you were laughing. Kendall and Shiv and Roman—they were stifling their own smiles down at the screen, too.
That night, you stood on your balcony, a lit cigarette loosely balanced between your fingers. You weren’t at all a smoker—in fact, you hadn’t had one ever since you joined Waystar. It was an unprofessional look, in a sense. Not something you wanted to be associated with. 
The goddaughter that smelled of cheap cigarettes. Wasn’t that an unattractive thought?
But you didn’t have to worry about that anymore, did you? Honestly, you weren’t quite sure yourself. You’d just assumed you were no longer part of the company, but knowing Logan…
He always had something up his sleeve. Maybe he’d wait until the siblings lowered their guards to snipe you in the back of the head. Or lure you back with meaty bait. 
You took a short drag, faint grey wisps falling past your lips as you breathed out. 
“You smoking now? Doing a little smokey smokes?” came Roman’s voice from behind you, making you turn your head with a slight grin. “Since when?”
“First one since I was a little baby teenager, I think,” you replied. Roman leaned onto the balcony railing beside you, shoulder pressing flush against yours. “They taste disgusting. Here—”
You took a drag—a longer one, this time—leaned forward until your lips were just a whisker away from his, and blew the smoke into him. He inhaled deep before jerking forward to kiss you, nose nudging yours in his fervor.
“Yeah. Fucking disgusting,” he mumbled against your lips, as if wanting to propel you into something more than just kisses. 
Your eyes lit up with amusement, but you pulled away, leaving a lingering kiss on the side of Roman’s nose. The cigarette wasn’t at all used up, but you put it out on a small ashtray you had taken with you. 
“I just wanted to try,” you said. “Was wondering if I’d like it after all this time, now that I have the freedom to.”
There was a curious glint to Roman’s molten eyes. “And do you?”
“Nah. Like I said—they taste disgusting.”
“Some people like disgusting,” he off-handedly said, and you shot him a pointed look.
A breezy laugh, lost to the wind. “Yeah. I might know someone.”
“You’re a goody two-shoes, you know that?” he commented snidely, but his eyes were far too soft for his words to strike harsh. “But it’s good. We need someone like that. The company, I mean.”
“I know,” you whispered back. “I’m glad we’re doing this.”
“Yeah,” Roman said, his hand lacing with yours. He began tugging you back inside. “Me too.”
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Connor wanted the four of you to come to his wedding rehearsal at a fancy restaurant downtown—he texted you multiple different addresses, each text telling you to disregard the last one. Then, he called you (called Shiv first, but she was on the phone, passive-aggressively bickering with Tom), and told you exactly where he was. Apparently Willa wasn’t very happy with the venues they’d booked. He sounded sad—it was always easy to tell when he was sad.
And so the four of you set off for him, though not without Roman’s constant complaints. Spending some quality time with their eldest brother was the last thing the Roy siblings wanted to do—they had far more pressing matters at hand. 
Sandi and Stewy, for one. They wanted to veto the acquisition for more dollars squeezed from Matsson’s hand. Roman was starkly against the idea, not wanting to blow more bullets into his father. Shiv and Kendall were far more willing to listen, though Kendall eventually backed down. It was appealing, you had to admit, especially because you hated Matsson’s guts, but you wanted to put business aside for the moment. Spend some time with Connor—after all, he was going to get married soon. If that ever ended up happening, that is.
Once inside the restaurant’s halls, you caught sight of Willa hurrying down the wide staircase by the entrance, looking a bit frazzled. 
“Oh, hi!” she said, slightly breathless. “So you’re here now, huh?”
“Hi, Willa,” you greeted, embracing her with a loose hug before stepping back. “Are you… going somewhere?”
“You standing up my big bro?” Roman quipped from right behind you. He was joking, but Willa only frowned. “Are you okay? Did something happen?” 
There was a nervous laugh from both parties.
“Oh, yeah! Yeah, yeah, I’m just—I’m having a little drink. Away.” 
Both you and Roman spared each other confused glances.
“Is the dinner rehearsal thing over? He still up there?” Roman asked.
The blonde fiddled with her phone, nearly dropping it. “Oh, uh, the rehearsal isn’t—it’s not done, no.”
“You’re leaving your own wedding rehearsal?” you gently questioned.
She smiled, though it came off only sad and tired. “I think they can manage. I’m not vital from here.”
Roman squinted at her. “Yeah, well… I mean, normally the bride is generally considered—correct me if I’m wrong—I think the bride is pretty vital in a wedding. Don’t you think?” 
“Well! Yeah, but… I should go, though. Have a think about it all. I’m in a bit of a fuzz.” She laughed again, though it looked like she wanted to cry. 
Nodding, you said, “Take care of yourself, Willa. Let us know if you need anything.”
She pursed her lips, eyes soft with appreciation. The two of you had never been quite close, but there was a mutual understanding between you. To be the pedestals of Roy men, the unnamed crutch, the woman on the arm. 
With that, she hurried away. 
“Fairy tale wedding, huh?” Shiv said, eyebrows raised. “Should we even go up? Seems like the rehearsal is over.”
“She said it wasn’t,” you replied, shrugging. “We should go see Con.”
Roman crossed his arms. “Yeah, Shiv, we really should. Why? You got something better to do than see your own brother before his wedding?”
“No, it’s just—we’ve got quite a lot to discuss, that’s all.”
It was Kendall’s turn to query, “What? Sandi and Stewy? They’re baiting us. Just let it go, Shiv.”
“I think they could really help us! We overpromised on Pierce!” she hotly defended.
“It’s a mind game,” Roman agreed with Kendall. “Just—fuck ‘em, okay?”
The redhead looked at you, but you shook your head. “Let’s just go see Connor, okay? We can hash it out after making sure he hasn’t got a gun barrel in his mouth.”
“Sure. Fine,” Shiv said, though it didn’t seem all that fine to her, judging from her pinched expression.
The four of you traipsed up the stairs, spotting Connor instantly—alone, surrounded by near-untouched platters of expensive food.
“Found him,” Roman sarcastically commented, pointing a finger at his oldest brother, who cracked a fond smile.
“Finally,” Connor said. “Took you guys long enough.”
Roman gave him an embrace from the side, saying, “Hey, bro. Hugsy.”
To the other side, Kendall patted his shoulder, another hand thumping on his chest. Shiv only barely leaned down to hug him, telling him, “Dad screwed us.”
“Yeah,” the eldest said. “I heard. But look at you guys—the Rebel Alliance.”
You were last to give Connor a hug, squeezing him tight, pressing a chaste kiss to his cheek. “How’s the rehearsal been?”
A non-committal noise slipped past his lips. “Been good. It’s been okay.”
Roman made a strange, wincing sound, sucking air through his teeth. “Sure. Yeah, I believe you.”
Keen to change the subject, Connor surveyed his siblings—and you—with narrowed eyes. “So this is how it is, huh? Battle royale. Me and Dad on one side, you guys on the other?”
Strange, you hadn’t quite recalled Connor being so in with his father’s business plans. And… the fact that Logan hadn’t shown up to the wedding rehearsal at all.
“You okay, man?” Roman queried, genuine concern slipping over his features. He was always one to wear his heart on his sleeve. “We bumped into Willa on the way in. She seemed all…” He drew up his hands to his face and shook his fingers about.
Pointedly, Connor dropped his gaze down to the table. Untouched food left and right.  “Yeah. It’s alright. I think it’s fine.”
“You sure, Con?” you asked, slipping into the seat beside him, Roman on your other side. 
“Yeah, well, I guess she just—she stood up to do her speech, and then she froze. Said that she couldn’t do it.” There was a laugh, dry and unpleasant and somber. “Then she went to the bathroom for forty minutes with her so-called friends.”
Roman wrinkled his nose and squinted his eyes at nothing in particular. “Oh, no, no, that’s—that’s totally fine. Don’t you worry about that. Just toss her another ten grand—or a snowmobile. Teeth-whitening vouchers.”
Unhappy with the meaning behind his brother’s words, Connor pushed himself away from the table, heading off to speak to Willa’s mom. 
Tossing a glare in Roman’s direction, you sighed out, “Was that really necessary?”
“What? It’s the truth, isn’t it?”
Slumping into the chair across from you, Kendall huffed out, “This is so fucking weird.”
“Do we regroup at my place?” Shiv asked, still standing, impatient to leave even though they’d just gotten there.
Tilting his head, Roman incredulously said, “Shiv. Come on. He’s… he’s looking a little rough. Don’t you think?”
“Well, sure. I’m sorry that Dad fucked us and I’m sorry that we’re late. But we do need to decide fast.” 
“The Sandi and Stewy deal?” you queried.
Shiv let out a frustrated exhale. “Yeah.”
“Well, I think we’re already decided, no?” Kendall said, lifting a shoulder in half a shrug. Roman nodded in agreement.
“Are we, though? They made some pretty compelling arguments.” Shiv tapped her foot against the hardwood floors impatiently.
Glancing over at Connor, who was trying his best to console Willa’s mother, you bobbed your head, hesitant. “It could potentially ruin Matsson. The deal. I’d like to see it.”
Groaning a little too loudly, Roman said, “Sandy’s just a greedy little bitch. She’s got her hand up the ass of the carcass of her dad, and Stewy’s just coming along for the ride. Can we not do this right now? It’s a fucking—it’s a packet of horseshit.”
Trying her best to stay calm, Shiv perched herself on the edge of the seat next to Kendall. “Okay. And what if I want to talk it through? This would help us.”
Kendall arched a brow. “I think we should just rise above it.”
“Yeah, okay, but maybe Dad is not on it like he used to be—and maybe he’s underplayed his hand, and the board are all just hand-fucking-picked Japanese plastic cats just waving it through,” Shiv argued.
“It doesn’t hurt to try,” you added, trying your best to sway Roman by nudging him gently. He merely rolled his eyes and prodded you back, but said nothing more.
It was then that Connor came hurrying back, carding a hand through his hair. He tiredly sank back down into his seat. “No luck. Still incommunicado. I just really hope she’s okay.”
“I’m sure she is,” you told him, rubbing a hand over his shoulder. “She just needs space, is all.”
“Yeah.” As if he’d flipped a switch, Connor straightened and plastered on a smile. “So, what do you guys say? A little bit of karaoke?”
All three siblings grimaced. 
“Or would it be possible,” Roman began, scratching at his jaw, “to do anything other than that, in the entire universe?”
“I think karaoke sounds nice,” you offered. Honestly, you weren’t too keen on doing karaoke when your mind was abuzz with a million other things at the moment, but it was Connor, and he seemed so down about Willa at his own wedding rehearsal, and you just couldn’t bring yourself to say no to him. It was like kicking at an already-wounded puppy.
Connor grinned. “Nice! One in the bag. Come on, you guys. Don’t leave us hanging.”
Shiv looked near ready to bash her head against the table. Kendall was glancing down at his phone—texting someone.
Roman rolled his eyes and groaned again, even louder than before. “Ugh. Fine! We can drink, though, right? I’m not listening to you sing sober.”
Clearing her throat, Shiv said, “Well, I just, we kind of have—other engagements right now—”
“Oh, sure. Everybody’s busy,” Connor crooned. Though, if you looked close enough, you’d see the unmistakable hurt in his eyes. Why didn’t his baby sister want to spend time with him?
“Come on,” Kendall said with an urgent hand slanting over Shiv’s shoulder, phone gone for now. “Let’s give him a drink.”
Clapping his hands, Connor stood up again. “Great! But—not any of your stupid places. Somewhere fun and real and—away from all the fancy dance. A real bar with, uh, with chicks, and guys who work with their hands in grease—sweat dripping down their backs and blood all over their hair.”
“I don’t like these guys. They sound like a medical experiment gone wrong,” Roman piped up, slinging an arm over your shoulder.
“Sounds hot,” you said with a genuine laugh. “Let’s go.”
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The bar itself was atmospherically ambient, the lights warm and unharsh, the chatter light and friendly, the television playing a football match at a soft volume. You smiled—it’d been a while since you stepped foot into an actual bar full of people who weren’t aristocratic assholes.
Normal people doing normal things. What was that like?
Roman, on the other hand, looked particularly uncomfortable, shoulders stiff and expression taut. He was only here for his big brother, but his saint-like kindness only wore so thin.
Kendall ordered drinks for the lot of you—whiskey on the rocks for himself, a sealed soda for Shiv since she didn’t trust anything from the bar’s “tainted” nozzles, a fancy beer for Connor, a vodka tonic for Roman, and a strawberry margarita for you. He snorted when you asked for it, rolling his eyes to the side. 
“You and your strawberries,” Kendall said, before heading off to call the bartender. You weren’t quite sure if his expression was fond or derisive. Perhaps both.
You sat beside Connor, peering over his shoulder, where he was staring at the screen with heavily knitted brows.
“Is that—is that Willa?” you asked, eyes widening upon seeing him zoomed onto a map with a tiny blue dot. “Are you tracking her?”
“Jesus, Con,” said Roman, laughing his high-pitched laugh. “That’s low, even for you.”
“What? I have her location shared,” the older brother said, earning quizzical looks from the three of you. “It’s a factory setting.”
Shiv made a noise of amusement. “It’s not.”
“Well…” Connor’s eyes darted back down to his screen, zooming in impossibly closer. “I’m reassured she’s definitely not on her way to Cuba.”
From his other side, Kendall appeared, hands shoved deep into his pockets. “Well, her phone isn’t.”
Connor decided to ignore the comment. “She stopped moving, so… I guess she found a spot she likes.”
“Sure!” crooned Roman. “On another man’s dick.”
The rest of you sighed, and you shook your head. 
“On a much bigger, nicer, harder, younger dick, is all I’m saying,” Roman reassured his eldest brother, patting his shoulders.
“Can we not?” Connor softly said, though he was smiling down at Rome. Even though his words hurt, just the fact that he was there for him cheered him up just a little bit. “Okay? I’m feeling—I’m having certain anxieties, alright? I want to have a good time!”
Once Roman muttered a quick apology, you bumped him off to the side so you can press up next to Connor again, staring down at the blue dot, still unmoving. “I’m sure she just needs a breather. It’s a big deal, y’know. Marriage.”
“I know,” said Con, sucking in a deep breath. There was a profound sort of loneliness to his eyes. “I just thought—I thought it was enough. All of it. It was enough for her.”
“It will be,” you said, nudging him. “Eventually. Just give her time.”
The drinks came then, and you hummed contentedly after taking your first sip. ���Fuck. Why don’t they ever have shit like this at the fancy events we go to?”
“Because it’s diabetes in a cup,” Roman replied, but he plucked the glass from your fingers to snag a sip for himself. “It’s literal sugar water. Barely any alcohol in here.”
“Well, I’m not looking to get wasted,” you said, before snatching it back, shooting him a half-hearted glare. “You drank so much!”
“Nuh-uh, there was barely anything in there to begin with!”
“Roman, it was filled to the brim two seconds ago, what are you talking about?”
Before the two of you could divulge into a round of childish bickering, Connor abruptly straightened in his seat. “Her dot is at an aquarium supply retailer. That doesn’t make sense—is that a drug thing?”
Kendall cleared his throat. “No, I don’t think so.”
“You sure?”
Roman snickered. “It is. It’s a drug thing.”
“Maybe she’s getting a pet fish,” you unhelpfully supplied. “A little pre-wedding gift for the two of you?”
Frowning, Connor said, “Now she’s at a dry cleaner’s.”
“Probably getting her panties cleaned from the new dick’s cum,” quipped Roman. The absurdity of the statement made you laugh unexpectedly, but you quickly quietened when Connor stared at the two of you in horror. 
“What’s wrong with you?” he asked, as if he were a parent scolding a naughty toddler. 
“I’m not saying it’s your cum! Your cum, I’m sure, is very washable.” Roman droned on to an incredulous Connor some more, but your attention was drawn to Kendall, whose phone began to ring, and he quietly excused himself from the bar to take the call, face twisted into unmistakeable dread. You briefly wondered who he looked so anxious to talk to, but the thought was quick to banish from your mind entirely when Connor prodded Roman in the shoulder and said your name.
“Okay, that’s enough from you. Y/N, can you tell him to stop? Tell him to stop.”
“Stop it, Roman. Don’t talk about your brother’s cum, you weirdo.”
Rubbing his palms together, Roman shrugged the matter away entirely. “I’m starving. Anything to eat in this shit shack, or what?”
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By the time Kendall came back, the rest of you were crowded into a small booth with a dingy little light hanging a little too low over the table. There was a platter of cheesy nachos in the center, which Shiv eyed with distaste. Roman was still looking over the menus, sarcastically wondering aloud from which creature they’d clipped the wings off of.
“Who were you talking to, Ken?” you asked. “It wasn’t Frank again, was it?” 
Kendall’s eyes darted from your face down to the floor. “Uh… no. No, it was—it was Stewy.” 
Something about his demeanor screamed that he wasn’t telling the entire truth, but you kept quiet, watching him with just barely narrowed eyes. 
“Oh, great. What the fuck does he want now?” Roman hissed, peering over the crinkled lamination of the menu he was holding. 
Kendall leaned forward slightly, regarding Shiv with a pointed stare. “Actually, guys, can I… can I show you something? On the comparables. It’s actually pretty fucking intriguing.” 
Your eyebrows rose a fraction. Just a few moments ago, Kendall wasn’t at all interested in Sandi and Stewy’s pitching. What changed his mind?
Nodding in satisfaction, Shiv added, “Yeah, see? It makes you think. Maybe Dad isn’t on it like he used to be. You know, he’s being pushed around by Matsson—hell, even by Kerry. Giving shows to his girlfriend? That’s just—it’s an embarrassment!”
Loudly, Connor exclaimed, “Fuck, she’s in the East River now! She’s in the—oh. Wait, no, she’s just on the bridge.” You popped a nacho in your mouth and glanced over at Connor, who was squinting down at his phone.
“Looks like she’s going on a little trip,” you hummed. “She’ll be fine.”
“Yeah, okay, not to be dicks, Con, but is it okay if we do a little breakout chat, just the four of us? We won’t be long, like—two minutes max,” Shiv said, expression serious and unyielding.
Rolling his eyes, Roman gestured to his oldest brother. “Hey, just—fuck it. Why don’t we fold Con in?” 
“Well, he’s not on the board, so—”
“Yeah, but he has a share. If the deal falls, he loses his payout.”
An incredulous frown pulled at his lips. “Excuse me?” Connor said.
“Oh, okay, so Shiv wants to get us mixed up in some drug deal that will fuck the vote tomorrow,” Roman told him, pursing his lips in an exaggerated fashion.
Holding her hands out, Shiv shook her head. “Uh, no. All we’re aiming for is a small delay. We all want the deal to go through.”
“Right,” you said with an amused snort. “Sure.”
“I, uh… I think I agree,” said Kendall.
Roman’s eyes widened. “Oh, what the fuck? Seriously?”
 “It’s just—looking at the numbers… it’s compelling.”
With a grand scoff, Roman shook his head. “It’s compelling? Wow. You’d find a bag of peanuts more compelling, Kendall.”
You placed a hand over Roman’s jolting knee. “Rome, why don’t we just hear them out?” His eyes met yours, hesitant and conflicted. “And think—wouldn’t it be fun? Fucking Matsson in the ass?”
“Yeah, I bet you’d like that, you freak,” he scoffed, crossing his arms.
“So you guys are just gonna force Dad to grovel?” Connor asked, mouth parted in surprise. “Oh, man. How long will a renegotiation take?”
Shiv’s lips twisted downwards, though it was more of a smile than a frown. “It’s a play. More money is more money, and that’s all there is to it.”
It was then that Roman’s phone, facing upwards on the chipped table, vibrated thrice. The screen lit up with a text notification. 
Dad.
All the siblings had seen it, and Shiv rushed to angle the phone towards her. Roman slapped her hand away, yanking his phone towards his chest. Hiding it.
“What the fuck?” Shiv asked, wary. “The fuck is Dad messaging you for?”
Roman stood frozen, reminiscent of a deer in headlights. “Uh, I don’t know. Why don’t you ask him? Stupid question, Shivvy.”
Kendall stared at his younger brother blankly. “You’re not gonna read it?”
There was a brief pause. “Yeah, I’ll—I’ll read the damn thing. Sure.” A swipe of his phone, a kink to his brows. “It’s just a check-in.”
“Oh, yeah?” Shiv said, skeptical. “A check-in? Oh, yeah. Classic Dad. He just loves to check in on us, see how we’re doing.” 
Backing down, Roman fessed up, “Okay, fine, I sent him a text on his birthday. Just saying, you know, happy birthday, sorry we missed it—”
“I’m sorry, wait a minute!” Shiv exclaimed. “You texted him first?”
Roman frowned. “It was his birthday, yeah.”
“We said no contact until he apologizes!” she angrily pointed out.
“Okay, so then never?” Roman shot back, scowling.
With a tilt of your head, you said, “It was just a simple happy birthday, right? That’s harmless. Right, Roman?” You pressed your foot over his, enough so he could feel the pressure, but not enough to hurt him.
“Yeah. That was it.”
“Nuh-uh. I want to see your phone,” said the red-head. 
A flicker of panic flashed across Roman’s eyes. “Oh, really? Show me yours, then! World’s biggest WhatsApp group of people sharing pictures of your snatch. No, thank you. Fuck off, fuck you.”
“Roman, come on,” Kendall said. “We have to trust each other.”
Memories of Kendall forcefully taking Roman’s phone from you in Hungary briefly crossed your mind. You pursed your lips. He’d been hiding things from you then, who was to say he wasn’t hiding things from you now?
Relenting, Roman tossed his phone onto the table, almost hitting the platter of nachos. He was growing angrier by the second, frustrated by his siblings' shoes pressing against his spine. “Fine, take a good look. I don’t give a shit. It’s just dick pics, anyway. He’s got a real taste for ‘em now.”
You leaned over to read along with Shiv and Kendall. It looked fine to you—since it was just a simple birthday wish, but they seemed much more harsh in their critique.
“This is more than one text, Roman.” There was a crease between Shiv’s brows.
“Okay. What is it? Two, three?”
Kendall rubbed the faint stubble over his jaw. “It’s a bit warm.”
“Warm? Why, what did I say?”
“Take care.”
Scoffing, Roman’s eyes rolled up to the dingy, low-hanging light. “What was I supposed to say? Happy birthday, hope you fall down a flight of stairs, shithead!”
“I feel a little bit weird about this betrayal, if I’m being honest,” Shiv said in a steely tone. 
“Betrayal?” Roman parroted, almost offensively. “The betrayal of happy birthday, Dad. Take care!” 
“You know what?” Kendall chimed in. “I’m feeling a bit betrayed, too.”
Upset, Roman just about slammed his phone back down on the tabletop. “Wow. Great. Fucking family guilt-trip fest.”
“It wasn’t that bad,” you said, pinching the space between your brows. “It’s not illegal to say happy birthday, guys. Relax, okay?”
Connor nodded. “It’s hard. It’s been hard on everybody.”
The five of you sat in silence for a bit longer. Has it been hard? Or did it just feel like it because all of you had been so accustomed to getting everything handed over on a silver platter? 
Finally, Shiv swallowed heavily and said, “You know that he advised Tom on the divorce? Gave him a Dad trick—went and spoke to every pit bull in Manhattan and tied them up. I got Mommed.”
You frowned. So much had happened in the past few months, you’d sort of even forgotten Shiv and Tom were heading for divorce. “Tom did that? Jeez… I’m sorry, Shiv.”
Roman blew out a breath, mildly relieved that the heat was taken off of him for a moment. “I mean, there’s probably one more horrible motherfucker lawyer around somewhere, but, uhm… that sucks. I’m sorry.”
Shiv refused to meet either of your gazes. She didn’t want to be reduced to… Tom’s ex-wife. A shadow of her mother. 
“Guys, I just feel like we need to stick together,” Kendall said, firm. We should push back, and we should all be on board. We squeeze them.”
Equally level, Roman placed his hands on the table. “Okay, but, we want to do Pierce, right? We want an out?”
“Yes. But just with a bit more money,” Kendall agreed. 
“Yeah, that’s the thing—I don’t think Matsson will go up in price,” Roman argued. “He won’t! I know this, because I’ve spoken to him. I really think he might walk.”
 Good, you wanted to say, but you bit down on your tongue.
Both Shiv and Kendall began poking fun at him for not calling Matsson’s bluff.
Exasperated, Roman rubbed his knuckles along his hairline. “Okay, it just sounded like he meant it.” He didn’t look happy with the prospect of blocking the deal. He wanted to be a traitor to his Dad without being a traitor. To have his cake and eat it, too.
Shiv and Roman fell into another argument about whether or not Roman cared over conflict—that he was scared of his own Dad and wanted to back down like a coward.
Quelling his riled-up siblings, Kendall motioned for them to quiet down. “Honestly, though, guys. I think going with Sandi and Stewy is the best thing for us to do. As a team.”
Shiv nodded in agreement. “It’s a play. Buys us a couple weeks and more money.”
“He’ll get it,” Kendall said, trying to sway Rome. “It’s what Dad would do in his prime.”
And was that the goal? To try and imitate the beast to scare him off? A moth with false eyes to ward away predators?
Roman squinted at nothing in particular. Then, he angled his face to look at you. You hadn’t at all realized that your features were immobilized in uncertainty. 
“What?” Roman asked, knee knocking against yours.
“Your Dad’s going to hate us if we pull this.”
Roman laughed, high and nervous. The idea made him nauseous. “Seems like he already does.”
“No, he… he loves you. All of you. But this is… he’ll hate that he loves you, sure, that’s always been the case. But this time… he’ll hate you if you’re the reason he can’t win.”
Something sick twisted within Roman’s gut. He seemed to go all pale and wide-eyed. 
“It’s just a play, though,” Shiv said. 
“Just a play,” Roman echoed, sounding unsure. “It isn’t real?”
Kendall nodded. Shiv, too.
“Fine. Yeah, fuck it. I’m in.” Roman caved, and the two smiled at him. You squeezed his knee. 
With a sharp exhale, Connor huffed, “God damn it. God fucking damn it! You ruined it. You ruined it all.”
Roman apologized, but it seemed to fall upon deaf ears. Kendall tried to calm him down by asking his brother what he wanted to do. After all… it was supposed to be his big night before the big day.
“I wanted to get married tomorrow,” he said, cross. “I wanted to spend tonight with my family and tomorrow with Dad. I wanted to get my fucking money out. But you guys fucked it!”
Feeling mildly guilty, your other hand came up to rub Connor’s shoulder. “I’m sorry, really. You’re an innocent bystander caught in the crossfire. What can we do to make you feel better, Con?”
Several moments passed by in silence as Connor thought about it. What did he want? A giant bowl of ice cream so large you couldn’t see around it? A perfectly-tailored suit from the most expensive store he could find? A vintage bottle of whiskey and a nice book to sit with? They all sounded appealing to him.
“I would…” he finally started, “I’d like to sing one fucking song at karaoke because I’ve seen it in the movies, and nobody ever wants to go.”
Roman just about banged his head on the table. You flicked at his ear, before turning back to Connor. “Karaoke. Yeah, we can do that, Con.”
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The room was illuminated with hazy shades of purples and blues, the lights hidden behind indents in the wall. It looked modern and sleek—an upscale to what was typically seen in the movies. Connor didn’t hesitate to make a beeline for the karaoke machine, fiddling with buttons and remotes and smiling to himself when he managed to get it up and working without asking for help. Shiv and Kendall wandered around cautiously. Roman was quick to toss himself onto the long, spacious couch, hanging off of the seats as if he were melting. You curled up beside him with a pleased hum, nose brushing over his lower cheek, scratchy with barely-there stubble.
There was a bit more dilly-dallying—Connor was concerned about Willa’s blue dot disappearing completely. The siblings were quick to brush him off, reassure him, tell him he wasn’t going to ever do better than Willa. The usual.
You sipped on a glass of champagne that Kendall handed you. There was more chatter—amicable and light and teasing. You poked fun at Kendall’s lame hat whilst Shiv plainly told Roman that his shoes were a size too large for his feet. That his feet were small and dainty and he would fall over if they were any smaller. More drinks, more giggling, more stories. You learned that fresh-faced college Kendall once puked on Stewy’s bed and cried at the foot of it after drinking too much. You told the siblings that you once slept with Angelina from accounting during your first year at the company, to which they responded with shocked snorts. There was a point where Roman grabbed your face and kissed you and kissed you until the rest of the siblings began faux-gagging, and Connor complained that it was like watching his siblings make out. Goddaughter-and-son incest, he’d said. 
It was fun, maybe. The closest to fun you could have with Roy siblings.
And it was gone in a second, like a candle snuffed in a hurricane. 
Logan was coming. Connor invited him because he loved him and he loved all of you and—
It hurt. Simple as that. It hurt to see the people he loved so… so torn.
The smiles melted away, and the laughter buzzed down. It was tense again. Family turned business once more. Connor finally put on a song to sing while he waited for his father to come, but your ears rang with white noise, so you didn’t quite register which song he was brokenly following along.
You were scared, you realized. Scared to face the man with the knife in his back. Roman worked his jaw and he complained some more. Not that you really heard what he said.
At some point, his phone began to ring, vibrating in his pants, pressed up against your leg. You raised a brow and scooched back so he could take it out to check. 
Logan. Dad. Of course. Roman’s hands shook, but only a little bit. Enough for you to see. Shiv grabbed it and hung up for him, not liking how long he hesitated. You stared at the black screen for a bit longer, your own fingers twitching.
Connor continued to sing. He finished three songs—maybe four—until the door creaked open. No knocks.
Colin came in first, then your godfather, then Kerry. He nodded, almost polite, with a casual greeting hanging in the air. It was eternally strange, the way Logan smiled at you. Warm, maybe. You didn’t know.
“Shit,” Roman said, almost amused, mostly… unprepared.
Chancing a glance to Shiv and Kendall, you noticed their stiff upper lips, their frozen postures. 
“Can we go somewhere else?” Logan asked, glancing around the large room. “These lights, er…”
Shiv shook her head in exasperation. A roll of her eyes. “We’re not going anywhere.”
There was little resistance to Logan. “Fine,” he easily acquiesced. With that, he took a seat in a velvet black chair, across all the siblings and you. Kerry jerked to sit next to him, which made Shiv recoil with a sneer.
“We won’t be needing you, Kerry. Thanks.”
Roman nodded. “Yeah, this here is a family fuck-fuck.”
There were a few glances around, Logan and Kerry looked at each other but neither moved. 
“Let’s get this figured out, and I can let you get back to your fun,” said Logan, ignoring them.
“Might be a wasted trip,” Kendall sardonically replied, tongue sharp. “Wanna give us a blast of New York, New York and fuck off?”
“I wanted to say something,” their father said.
Shiv retorted something else, and Kendall snickered under his breath. The buzzing in your ears grew louder.
“I guess I just wanted you there, a bit,” Logan said. “At my party.”
It was a play. Was it? Yes, of course. But if it wasn’t… 
But it was.
“Holy shit,” Kendall crooned. “Did Dad just say a feeling?”
“Well, you know. I thought maybe it would be nice,” said Logan. 
With exaggerated motions of his hands, Kendall exclaimed, “Oh, fuck! Now it’s all coming out! Oh, my God, Mr. Melodrama here! It’s like a fucking telenovela!”
Connor gestured between Kendall and his dad. “Come on, guys. He’s trying.”
Logan smiled, calm. “Y/N, dear,” he began. Your eyes snapped up to meet his and your spine seemed to grow rigid. “I had a lovely chat with your father. He was… surprised that you’re no longer holding Waystar together. Wouldn’t it be a shame, considering all the money he’s invested into the company? You’re setting millions on fire.”
The siblings all looked at you, curious. You swallowed, finding your throat painfully dry, despite all the champagne you’d been sipping prior to Logan’s arrival.
“If they expected me to stay at Waystar my entire life, they were always bound to be disappointed,” you responded, careful. “I won’t be tied down.”
A twitch of the old man’s mouth. Down or up or perhaps it hadn’t moved at all. “A shame. You worked so hard to compose acquisition branch details on Pierce just under a year ago. So much paperwork.” He shook his head. “And all of you—you knew I wanted Pierce ever since then. When I lost out, it wasn’t a good feeling.”
Fed up, Shiv finally leaned forward and hissed out, “I’m sorry, can we just cut the shit? It’s obvious why you’re here, Dad!”
Unsuspectingly, Kerry chimed, “Your father wanted to address the personal stuff and not just launch into business.”
Shiv’s jaw clicked. “Well, see, this isn’t personal, Dad. This is a business decision. This is about the money.”
Logan bobbed his head. “Look, you’re smart to ask about the money. You are. But Matsson—he won’t go there. You haven’t been around this, but I’ve got done a good deal and you’ll get enough to do whatever you want. I do ATN, you do Pierce. It’ll be a fresh start for all of us. It’ll make things better, and it starts there. All you have to do is… vote yes and support the deal.”
There was an uneasy shift next to you—Roman looked torn.
“You can separate the personal from the business,” Kerry offered. “Reset your dynamic as a family.”
Shiv snorted. “Oh, super! It’s gonna be just like how it used to—summer vacay and road trip musicals!” 
Hesitant, Roman supplied, “It just… it may be more complicated than that, dad.”
“I guess you’re still in the honeymoon phase,” Shiv told Kerry, cold and sarcastic. “Getting your own show on TV… amazing.”
The dark-haired woman glanced around, seeming to shrink further into her seat.
“No?” Roman asked, his attention piqued. Anything to latch onto to make everything feel less—tortuous. “You’re not going to be on TV now?”
Shiv laughed. “Has he fucked you on that?” 
Kendall nodded. “That’ll happen. The fucking. But congrats on losing your betrayal cherry—”
“Enough!” Logan said. It wasn’t loud, but heavy with finality. Your pulse skipped a beat, scratching down your ribcage almost painfully. Logan looked tired. “I though you’d be interested in an apology, but that’s enough.”
Incredulous, Shiv held a hand out. “Wait, what? An apology? We missed that, I think.”
Logan fixed an intense stare over all his children. “Look, I don’t do apologies. But if it means so much to you, then… sorry.”
In all your years of living, you’re not sure you’ve ever heard Logan apologize before. Was it genuine? Was it real? There was a long, terse silence. Roman stared at his father with his mouth slightly agape. You wrapped your arms around your stomach and stared at the door. Connor was looking down at his shoes. Kendall aimlessly observed Logan, finding that the apology he’d yearned for so many years of his life seemed to fall incredibly flat.
Shiv just about glared at her father in a challenging fashion, lips pursing tight. “There is nothing you could say to me now that I would ever believe.”
“This deal push could be worth a hundred mil to us, Dad,” said Kendall. “How many sorrys do we get for that?”
Kerry was starting to say something, but Roman butted in, looking incredibly troubled. “What are you actually sorry for, Dad? Are we actually doing this? Because I think, you know… seriously, what fucked all of this was when… it all happened with Mom in Italy.”
Logan averted his gaze to the carpeted ground. “Yeah, okay. I’ve had certain thoughts about that. With the best of intentions, I got the structure of the holding company, and the ownership structure of the family trust. There is a lack of clarity, and maybe you got a—”
“Amazing,” Shiv deadpanned, cutting her father off. “You sure you’re not having a seizure?”
For the first time in a very long time, Connor raised his voice at his baby sister. “He’s trying, Shiv! You said you were interested in an apology!”
Shiv glared at her father again. In a less harsh tone, she asked, “Anything else, Dad?”
There was a long pause. You wondered if Logan was haggling for words. 
“Come on, Dad,” Kendall goaded. “What are you sorry for?”
It felt like bullying, almost. In a severely twisted way. 
Kendall continued on, “Are you sorry for fucking ignoring Connor his whole life?”
“Bit strong,” protested Connor.
“Hitting Rome when he was a kid?” Kendall pointed at Roman, who shrugged.
“Oh, no—I mean, everyone hit me. I’m fucking annoying.” 
You frowned at Roman’s words, wrapping an arm around his waist. 
“Having Connor’s mom locked up?” Kendall continued on. 
Something twisted in the eldest Roy sibling’s expression. “Can we not do a whole show trial here?”
Finally, Shiv hissed out, “Okay, what about advising Tom on my divorce? Yeah? I mean, that took effort. That was above and beyond.”
“Tom asked me for advice,” said Logan. It didn’t go past everyone’s notice how he ignored all the rest of the hurtled accusations. “I recommended someone he could speak to. You weren’t around. If you’d been around, I would’ve offered you the same advice. But I can’t help you if you don’t see me.”
Shiv was hurt. It was clear as day, even if she refused to show it. She built up a wall, a front, brick by brick, and spun her hurt feelings into a low-flamed fury.
“Bottom line is, if we ask for more money, Matsson walks. I know that.”
“No!” Shiv asserted. There was something firmer in her tone this time. Angrier. “You don’t know that! You don’t know him! You don’t fucking know everything! Just because you say it doesn’t make it true! Everyone just fucking agrees with you and believes you so it becomes true—and then you can turn around and say oh! You see? I was right! But that’s just—that’s not how it is. You’re a human fucking gaslight!”
The silence that stretched across the room was thin. You were afraid to breathe, and so you bit down on your tongue.
Logan nodded and nodded. The brothers were quiet.
And so you felt compelled to say something. Sick with nerves, but compelled nonetheless. “Matsson has been fucking the company since the very start of negotiations. It’s only fair if you… bite him back.”
Logan watched you. There was something in his eyes that seemed to soften, but it was near imperceptible. Maybe you were simply seeing what you wanted to see. “I can’t take that risk,” he finally said. “Look, I just wanted to get us all together. What you kids don’t realize… this is a good deal. The world likes it. It makes sense. But deals have a habit of disappearing because pricks like Matsson get pissed off or snubbed. This… this is fucking real.”
You turned your head away and stared at the door once more. You wanted to leave. Crawl into bed and stop thinking about it all. Beside you, Roman was biting down on his thumb. A nervous habit.
“Okay, I think I can speak for everyone when I say this… go ask him for more money, Dad.” Shiv narrowed her eyes at her father.
“Why?” Logan asked. Are you not satisfied with what you already have? was the unsaid, lingering question hanging in the air.
Kendall tilted his head up. “Just good business sense. Gotta make our own pile. Right, Dad?” 
“Yeah, I just have to listen to my gut. I just gotta go with what my gut says,” Shiv piled on.
“Oh, come on. Jesus.” Logan pulled at his face, tired. In a span of five, maybe ten minutes… he seemed to age a decade. Finally, finally, the nice mask slipped. He leaned back in the velvet seat and spat out, “You’re such fucking dopes.”
Roman’s nose twitched and he shifted so he could lean further into you. You let him.
“You are not serious figures,” Logan went on. “I love you… but you are not serious people.”
His eyes were glassy for a second, but you weren’t exactly sure, because he stood up and hurriedly strode out of the karaoke room the very next second. No goodbyes. Kerry followed close behind him.
The hazy purple lights were beginning to make you nauseous. 
Everybody sat in silence for a little while longer. Let the conversation marinate. Shiv poured herself a drink and smiled into the rim, expression victorious.
“How was it for you guys?” she asked the group. “Fucking Dad, that is.”
“Amazing. Just over too soon. I could’ve kept going,” Kendall admitted.
Roman abruptly stood up, scratching the back of his head uncomfortably. He made a noise of disgust.
“Rome, we’re kidding, man,” Kendall said.
He began to pace around, like a caged animal. “No, I know. It’s fine. It’s cool.”
Connor also stood up, shrugging on his jacket. “Well… I’m going home. ‘M tired.” 
“G’night, Con,” you said. He reached over the couch to give you a one-armed hug from behind. “She’ll come home. Willa.”
“It’s fine,” Connor said. 
Kendall arched a brow. “Really?”
“Yeah.” There was a nod and a tap of his shoe. “The good thing about having a family that doesn’t love you is that you learn to live without it.”
Shiv’s face crumpled. “What? Con, that’s not—”
With a shake of his head, Connor scoffed. “You’re all chasing after Dad saying, “Oh, please, love me, love me, I need love, I need attention!””
“I think that’s the opposite of what just happened,” Shiv argued. 
“You’re needy love sponges,” Connor pressed. “And I’m a plant that grows on rocks and lives off insects that die inside of me.”
Shiv laughed, Roman huffed, and Kendall stayed silent. 
“If Willa doesn’t come back, that’s fine. ‘Cause I don’t need love. It’s like a superpower,” he said. “And if she comes back and doesn’t love me, that’s okay too. I don’t need it. Thanks for the party.” With that, he stepped out of the karaoke room.
You jolted out of your seat, ignoring Roman’s questions as to where you were going. You rushed out the door after Connor, nearly tripping over your own feet in your haste.
“Connor!” you called out. The older man halted in the middle of the dimly lit hallway.
“What? I’m not looking for pity, Y/N—”
You shuffled forward the last few steps and put your hand on his elbow. “Con, I just… I wanted to say—” You shook your head and wrapped your arms around him. “You’re my brother. I know you are. And… even if you don’t need love or whatever you were on about in there… I’ll still love you anyway. Okay? I don’t need you to need my love. You’ll have it.”
There was a momentary pause before Connor jerkily moved to pat your back and hug you back. Loose, but solid.
“You’re just a kid. A kid with my kid brother,” he said once he pulled away, rubbing his palms up and down your forearms. His eyes seemed to be watery and tired, but he laughed right from his belly. “I love you, too, kid.”
“Yeah?”
“Of course.”
The two of you grinned at each other. 
“G’night, Con.” He let you go when you stepped back. “Big day tomorrow.”
“Yeah…”  Connor nodded. “Big day.”
He walked off, and you watched him go. When you heard the door open, you turned to see Roman peeking his head out.
“Hey, Rome,” you greeted. “I love you, you know that?”
His eyes roamed over your face, and he smiled back. It was lopsided and slight. “Mmkay. Yeah, me too, fuckface. You feeling okay?” 
“Yeah. Should get home.” You craned your neck to lean forward, affectionately pecking his cheek. “You coming with?”
He shifted his weight from foot to foot. Eyes to the ground, then to the walls. Not on you. 
“Not… not yet. I’ll come in a bit. Just need to grab something from my place first.”
His place was barren. Everything in his place, you had in yours. You probably had more of his clothes in your closet than his own. You regarded him with a curious look, but decided not to press further.
“Okay, Rome. You have the key. Just don’t jostle me awake when you climb into bed.”
He guffawed. “I’ll sleep on the floor then, your royal majesty.” 
“Thank you.”
“I was joking. Just so you know. You prick.”
“I know. I wouldn’t want you to sleep on the floor, anyway. A waste of body heat.”
He kissed you then, surging forward to chase after your lips. You hummed in pleasant surprise, but kissed him back with just as much vigor. His lips were a darker shade of pink when he pulled away.
“See you at home, Roman.” After a final pat on his cheek, it was your turn to walk off. 
Roman wrung his hands nervously. There’d been a text to his phone while you were out talking to Connor—from his Dad. He glanced back at the door, where Shiv and Kendall were still speaking to each other inside. He rolled his shoulders and began to slowly walk out of the building, careful not to bump into you.
He was going to go pay his father a visit.
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The top spot at ATN. Was it a tempting offer in it of itself or was it just tempting because his father was goading him to lick off the silver platter?
When he told you, and of course he told you, you just about blew up—in the most professional, stick-in-ass way possible—warning him not to take the offer with a strained voice and wide eyes. Not even consider it. ATN wasn’t where he wanted to be. His father was offering him a cyanide pill, obscured by a layer of fucking strawberries and cream.
The next morning, he numbly got dressed for Connor’s wedding. Got into the car after you, pinching your thigh once he clambered in next to you. His father called him on the way there, much to your dismay, telling him to come with him to meet Matsson, despite Connor’s wedding being literal hours away.
Roman turned him down. But he didn’t turn Logan away when he told Roman to fire Gerri since, apparently, he was beginning to lose faith in her. 
You were pretending not to listen to their conversation, but he knew you were. He could tell by the way your jaw seemed to twitch at the prospect of cutting Gerri loose. 
“Shit,” he breathed out once Logan hung up on him. “That’s fucking… bullshit.”
You drew your eyes away from the window, regarding him with narrowed eyes. “Don’t do it, Rome.”
Everything felt crowded and tense all of a sudden. Roman squared his shoulders defensively. There was a stinging quip on the tip of his tongue, but nothing seemed to come out other than a rather passive, “Mmh.” 
The rest of the drive to the wedding venue was silent. But your hand came to lace with his, and that made him feel just a bit better. 
Once there, about half a dozen cameras swarmed the two of you coming out of the car, taking several candid shots, much to your irritation. It was only expected, what with Connor being in the run for president and the whole wedding being a PR move, anyway. But you gave them a smile nonetheless, made a show of kissing Roman’s cheek and walked off to greet other work acquaintances and wedding guests. From the corner of your eye, you could see Roman trying to talk to Gerri with a rather terse look on his face. You tried not to pay him any mind. He was digging his own grave.
Half an hour later, the wedding planner announced for family and friends to start boarding the boat. The few businesswomen you were chatting to kissed you on the cheek and told you they’d see you soon. You waved them goodbye and made your way onto the boat. Kissed and hugged and congratulated Willa. She looked beautiful in her wedding dress, even if she didn’t appear all too happy wearing it. After a short conversation, you moved on into the boat.
It was lavishly decorated, screaming luxury and American patriotism. There was a concerning amount of blue and red strewn everywhere. They weren’t being very subtle, were they?
You made your way onto the second floor, greeted by Kendall in a pair of sunglasses.
“Hey, loser,” he said, nudging you in the side. “You look nice.”
“Thanks,” you replied, giving him a quick once over. “You look shitty. Hiding your terrible eyebags behind those shades, are you? Not doing a very good job, by the way.”
He seemed unfazed by your jab. “You excited for the wedding?”
“Neither Connor nor Willa seem too hot about it,” you told him with a mild grimace. On your way to the boat, you heard Connor yelling at his wedding planner about the cake being inadequate.
Kendall shrugged and pulled a nonchalant expression. “It’ll blow over. They’ll be fine.”
“I know. It just feels so… fake. All of it.” You jerked your head toward a frilly blue, red, and white banner. 
“Yeah, well, yours won’t be,” he said, scrutinizing you behind those ridiculous shades of his. “With Rome, I mean.”
“Wow! Yeah, well, we aren’t quite there yet, I think.” You laughed and rolled your eyes to the ceiling. “Besides, I can’t guarantee that you’re even invited to this hypothetical wedding. Who knows? I can never tell with you guys. You’re always five minutes away from ruining each other’s lives or being best friends.”
“I’ll crash your wedding if I’m not invited. It’s my baby brother, dude. I have to be there,” he said. You couldn’t tell if it was a joke or not. 
“Good to know,” came your lighthearted retort. “I’ll be sure to save a slice of cake for you.”
With that, you bumped your fist into his bicep and walked off. Then, you spotted Roman out on deck, phone in his hand. You stepped out just in time to hear him bark out, “Don’t listen to this if you don’t want to—but I’m not… I’m not, uh, totally okay with… are you kinda just being shitty with me, Dad? ‘Cause… your son is getting married, and you can’t fucking just keep expecting me to bend over for you and being cunty, so I’m just asking. Yeah—that’s the question, actually. Are you a cunt? Okay. Give me a buzz.”
There were a few seconds of silence after he hung up. You approached him from behind and slung both your arms around his waist, resting your chin on his shoulder. 
“Hey, fuckface,” he said. He sounded tired. Distressed.
“Hey,” you quietly said in reply. “I’m proud of you.”
“For calling Dad a cunt?”
“Yeah.” You huffed out a laugh. “I really am proud of you.”
Roman leaned back against you and hummed. “I just got on this boat and I already want to fucking leave.”
“That’ll break Connor’s heart.” 
“I know. I’m his favorite brother.”
“I think Shiv is his favorite brother, actually.”
The two of you laughed, and he didn’t bother arguing back. 
“Come on. I think Kendall and Shiv are looking for you,” you said, tugging him inside.
The two of you greeted the three other Roy siblings, where Connor was giving a rundown of his plan for Logan. 
“Okay, so the idea is that Dad will pop by, be dockside, and you guys will just be up here. I think that’s cleanest,” Connor told all of you.
Shiv pursed her lips and tilted her head. “Oh… okay. You really think he’s going to pop by?”
“I spoke with Kerry,” Connor said with a smile, crossing his fingers. “He’s hoping.”
With a nod of thanks, he gave you and Roman both a quick hug, before rushing back downstairs to be with his wife-to-be. 
“Well, someone’s gotta tell him,” said Shiv. “We should tell him.”
“We should,” Kendall agreed. Both you and Roman nodded. 
“Well, Shiv, you are his favorite,” you offered. 
The woman’s face regarded you as if you’d just stabbed her in the back. “No, come on—really?”
“He likes you,” Kendall insisted.
“Fine,” she sighed with slitted eyes. “I’ll be the wedding Grinch. Fuck you.”
The three of you watched her go with muted snickers. 
Then, Roman’s phone began to buzz. He fished it out of his pocket and let out an annoyed groan upon seeing Tom’s caller ID. 
“Oh my—ugh,” Roman hastily pressed on the green answer button, “Hello? Fucky-sucky brigade, how can I help you? Yeah?” 
You leaned onto the fancy leather couches next to Kendall, who was staring out the window, watching the gentle waves roil over the surface of the harbor. “Hey, Ken?”
“Mmh?”
“I’d invite you, you know.” 
Kendall’s eyes left the waters to look at you. “What?”
“To my wedding. Before I said I couldn’t guarantee you a spot—but I’d want you there.”
Something akin to gratitude flashed across his face. Before he could say anything, Roman’s panicked voice echoed over, and the both of you snapped your heads towards him.
“What?” he said into the phone. “Tom, what are you—?”
“What?” Kendall asked, immediately on his feet. “What’s happening?”
You followed suit, the two of you hovering over Roman’s sides. 
His palms grew white over the phone. “It’s—uh, Tom. Apparently Dad’s sick. Uh, what do you mean he’s sick? Sick, like—Tom? What’s going on? Are you still there?” 
“Where is he now?” you asked, brows furrowed. Roman could only shake his head, equally clueless, pulling the phone away so he could put it on speaker.
“Is he okay?” Kendall immediately asked. “Who’s with him?”
There was a lot of rustling and rummaging. It felt as if your heart had crawled its way into your throat. 
“It—it seems bad. Very, very bad. I’m so sorry to call you like this,” Tom’s voice crackled through.
“What?” you croaked. “What is it, though? Like, a fever?”
“Can you put him on the phone?” Roman asked. His voice shook and his brows were pulled tightly together. 
Again, Kendall asked the same questions, “Who’s there? Tom, what’s going on? What happened?”
“Ah—” You could practically see Tom scratching at his head. “He was short of breath and he went into the bathroom. And, well, uh, someone heard something and we were concerned, and they went in there.”
Kendall used his hands to gesticulate to nobody in particular. “They broke in?”
“They broke in, yeah. They had the key and they got in, but he’s not responsive.”
“Not responsive?” you parroted, eyes widening. This was far worse than just… sick. “Like—is he conscious?”
The brothers started to blurt out a multitude of questions, concerns exponentially heightened. 
“Is he talking? Can he talk?” Kendall asked.
“Is he breathing?” Roman’s shoulders were hunched over, as if he was trying to shrink in on himself. 
There was a brief pause. Uncomfortable and festered with fear. 
“They’re doing chest compressions,” Tom’s voice pierced through.
Your lungs seemed to contract in panic at his words. The room felt all the smaller. 
“Oh!” Roman exclaimed in a mixture of both shock and anguish. “Fuck.”
Kendall only pressed on with his queries. “Has his heart stopped?”
“I don’t know.”
“Do you guys have the machine on board? The heart thing?” Roman asked.
“The defibrillator,” you said, clutching both your anxious, wringing hands to your chest. 
How had the day turned on its head so quickly?
“Is Siobhan there?” Tom’s voice was patchy and unclear. It was hard to hear over Kendall’s barrage of frustration.
“No, she’s not,” said Roman.
“Karl said that maybe he’s breathing,” Tom claimed.
Leaning forward, you hissed out, “Karl isn’t a medical professional, Tom. Who’s trained in there?”
“The, uh, the people. The attendant. I’ll put you on speaker—here’s, uh, Karl, here—”
The older man’s voice buzzed through, “That captain has been informed. The cabin staff are receiving medical advice from their service.”
Both Kendall and Roman barked questions over each other. Faintly, you heard an additional third voice in the back of the call.
“Is that Frank?” you asked. 
Tom cleared his throat. “Yeah, so—Frank thinks you guys should speak to him.  And I can—I can hold the phone near him if you’d like.”
Roman bit down on his tongue, angry. “Why does Frank think that, Tom?”
“I guess if it’s a last chance, you know. I think it’s the last chance.”
A shudder and a glare from Roman to the phone. “What the fuck do you mean, Tom?”
“You think he’s gonna die?” you whispered, eyes stinging as you stared down at the screen, watching the seconds of the call tick by.
“He’s… he’s not in good shape. They’re doing chest compressions.”
“Well, should they be doing that?” Roman just about yelled at the phone. You placed a hand on his hunched shoulder.
Frank began talking again, “They’re getting advice, they know what they’re doing. But I think you should talk to him. I’m not sure he’s breathing.”
The two both spluttered angrily. In denial, in frustration, in utter devastation.
“We just heard that he was breathing two seconds ago, Frank. You shouldn’t be doing CPR on someone who’s heart is still going! What the fuck is going on, Frank?” Kendall gritted out.
“I’ll put you by his ear,” Tom said. “I’ll put you right by him. He’ll be able to hear you if—if he can.”
If you hadn’t been so hyperfocused on the call, you would’ve realized that your entire body began to simultaneously tremble and tense, like a plank of wood caught in a hurricane. 
“Uh, you might wanna get Shiv, so she can—” 
“Yeah, we’ll—we’ll get her,” said Roman.
“Okay, I’ll put you by him now.”
“Is he okay?”
“No, Rome, he’s not okay.”
“You can speak now. Go ahead.”
There was a blistering silence. Roman gestured for Kendall to take the phone first, but he shook his head. He turned to you, but you weren’t even looking in his direction, clamoring for your own phone to try and contact Karolina. Your hands seemed not to work in coordination with your mind, because you struggled getting your phone to unlock, and then struggled even more to open up the right app to get to your contacts list.
This left Roman to speak to his maybe-dead dad on his own. He hurried around the room, as if there was going to be a corner on this wretched yacht that would make this somewhat easier to say. He ended up crouching by the end of the leather couch. 
“Hey, Dad. I, uh, hope you’re okay. You’re okay. You’re going to be okay.” Was he reassuring himself or his father? “Because you’re a—you’re a monster, and you’re going to win. ‘Cause you just—you just win. That’s what you do. And you’re, uh… you’re a good man. You’re a good dad. A very good dad. Uh… you did a good job. No—no. I’m sorry, I don’t know how to do that.”
With that, Roman unceremoniously stood up and shoved his phone right into your palms, tugging away your own. “It’s your turn.”
Your shaking grew all the worse, but you put on a brave face and held it up to your face.
“Oh, uhm—hi, Uncle Logan. You, uhm… oh—I wasn’t prepared or this, you know, I would’ve… I would’ve, if I’d known, I wouldn’t have…”
It occurred to you that you managed to say absolutely nothing in the precious few seconds he had left. This sent you spiraling into another bout of anxious trembling. You only barely registered Roman’s own shaking hand on your side.
“You were so—such a big role in my life. So important. And—and, and, I really couldn’t have done anything without your help. Thank you. For everything. I… I love you, Uncle Lo. Really, I do. And I love your kids like my own siblings, and—and Rome, I’m—I love him. I promise I’ll, uh, I’ll take care of him. I just—uhm, I can’t really, there are just so many things you…”
Your nails scratched over your chest as you heaved out a shuddering breath. Realizing you couldn’t finish, you made your way over to Kendall and handed the phone to him with teary eyes.
“Okay,” Kendall said with the phone by his nose, blinking helplessly at the ground. “Hang in there. Yeah? Uhm…”
“It’ll be okay,” Roman softly whispered to him.
“It’ll be okay,” Kendall repeated into the phone. “We love you, Dad. Okay? We love you. I love you, Dad. I do. I love you, okay? Uh—and… it’s okay. Even though you fucking… I don’t know. I can’t—I can’t forgive you.”
You sniffled and wiped a stray tear with the sleeve of your dress. 
After a few final words, Kendall handed the phone back to Roman. Tom’s voice crackled through again, asking for Shiv. 
“Ken’s gonna get Shiv,” Roman said, voice small and child-like. Kendall nodded and staggered his way out of the room.
There was more commotion on the other end of the line. 
“What’s going on now?” Roman asked. 
“I, uhm—there’s, I’m not so sure—” Tom’s glitchy voice replied. “I think he’s gone, Roman.”
“What?” you asked.
“I think—I don’t know, I think there might not be a pulse, they’re not—”
A few seconds passed, with only scuffling noises on the other end. Shiv and Kendall appeared through the doorway just a minute later.
“They think he’s gone,” Roman told his sister as he handed the phone to her. “They think he’s dead.”
“What?” Shiv asked, her eyes welling up almost instantaneously. “No! I… I can’t have that.”
Tom spoke a few words to his wife, telling her that he was putting the phone back by Logan’s ear. Shiv strode away to ramble to her father in a semi-panicked fashion. She called him Dad at first, which spiraled into whisper-cries of Daddy, and angry curses intermingled with a multitude of I love yous.
You tugged at your face, aching with all the tension you were carrying. Roman’s hand was on your arm, but he left your side half a minute later to take the phone away from Shiv, who seized up with incoherent noises through blurred tears. He hugged her, but she didn’t return it, frozen on the spot.
The siblings all asked him more questions. 
“Is he okay at all?” Kendall asked.
“He’s not okay, no,” replied Tom. “He’s not.”
Shiv sucked in a shaky breath. “Is he gone? Tom?”
A brief pause.
“They say his heart stopped and his breathing stopped, too. For a while, maybe.”
“Okay, but that doesn’t mean he’s dead, medically!” Roman asserted. “Right?”
You didn’t have the heart to tell him that it did mean exactly that.
“I don’t know,” came Tom’s calm voice. “They’re still doing chest compressions.”
Kendall began to order Tom around, then Frank, then Jess. Something about getting the best doctor in the world. The best airplane medicine expert, whatever that meant. He disappeared out of the room to go up to the deck. You took a seat on the couch and sank your face into your palms.
When Kendall returned, his face was solemn and set in stone. “Frank thinks he’s gone,” he said.
Roman sank down on the ground, right by your feet. Shiv took a seat next to you.
“Why didn’t you come and get me?” Shiv sniffled, looking up at her big brother. 
“I—Shiv, I did. We did,” Kendall said.
“No, but I was right out there. How long was it happening before?”
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m—I wasn’t thinking—” Kendall shook his head.
Roman drew in a sharp breath. “There was no time. I promise you, there was no time at all.”
Kendall took his little sister’s hand and repeated his apologies. The sight made more tears spill over your cheeks.
“I’m sorry, guys,” you hoarsely said. “He’s not even my dad.”
“No, it’s…” Roman patted your knee. “He was. He is. Kind of.”
“It’s just—on the phone Tom said that Kerry spoke to him. Quite a bit,” Shiv said, voice bitter.
“I don’t know,” said Kendall. “I don’t—we don’t know if he could hear us.”
Another sniffle. Shiv nodded a bit. “Yeah. I’m just sad, I guess.”
Roman shifted uncomfortably, looking up at his siblings and you with large, worried eyes. “Uh—do we know if he was on his phone at all? Like, if he checked his messages or anything?”
Faintly, you recalled Roman leaving a voice message for him. Right. Roman had called his father a cunt. And you’d said you were proud of him for it. Nausea pressed fervently against the inside of your stomach. Roman drew in a sharp, stressful breath.
“Rome, it’s okay,” Kendall assured him. “We’re okay. You did good.”
The words didn’t sit with you well. You did good—as if it were one last performance before the curtains closed. The circus monkey and the ringleader. 
“Yeah, I know,” he quickly replied. Roman’s expression crumpled. “I don’t know if—I just don’t know. Like, if I said… I just feel like I didn’t—did I even say I loved him?”
Kendall nodded. “I think so, yeah.”
“I’m pretty sure I didn’t,” Roman asserted. The grip he had on your knee tightened. “Do you know?”
“Ro, hon, I’m—” The words lodged in your throat as you reached out to brush your knuckles over his cheekbone. “He knows.”
“No, but I really don’t think I did—” Roman jerked away to lean closer to the phone Tom was calling through. “Tom, could you put me back to his ear for—ergh, fuck it. Never mind. I don’t know. Maybe just keep the line open.”
If Tom replied, you didn’t hear.
Instead, you glanced out the doorway, where you saw Connor speaking to some other wedding guests. He didn’t know.
“Oh, fuck. We need to get Connor. We need to tell him,” Roman said, following your gaze. “Can you do it, Ken? I don’t think I can. I mean, I could, I definitely could, I just—”
Kendall nodded solemnly, and stood up. Shiv offered to go with him, rising to her feet and drawing in a deep breath in a fruitless attempt to maintain her long-gone composure. 
“Thank you,” Roman said from the ground. He crossed his legs and leaned against the side of your shins. In turn, you placed your hands on his shoulders and squeezed reassuringly.
“I don’t remember the last thing I said to him,” you mumbled, voice filled with irritating tremors and warbles. “In that karaoke room. I don’t remember any of it, and I wasn’t even drunk or anything, I just—”
Roman pressed his cheek against your thigh, shutting his eyes. “I think you were okay. I don’t know. Maybe he heard us. And you have such a nice voice, y’know? Maybe it was good for him. If he heard it.”
The two of you sat in stuffy silence for a few minutes more. 
The three other siblings came to fetch the two of you sooner than you would’ve liked—whisking all of you upstairs to a more secluded room. Connor had tears in his eyes when all of you filed in, face wrought with anguish. “What happened?” he asked, sounding utterly devastated.
Roman apologized over and over again, but made no attempts to explain to him. Instead, he reached forward to grab at his oldest brother’s arm in a strange sort of semi-hug as Kendall filled Connor in on what happened.
“Well, actually, we don’t really know that he’s gone,” Roman asserted to the rest of you, drawing away from them. 
Both Kendall and Shiv began to clamor over the likelihood of Logan’s death. They seemed surprised that Roman was clinging onto such hope that he was alive. You watched Roman with such sad eyes that when he looked at you, he found himself growing even more upset.
“What?” he asked you crossly, brows drawing together. “Why are you looking at me like that? He—he could still fucking be alive! We don’t know! Are you going to trust, what, like, fucking Frank and Karl’s word on it? Don’t look at me like I’m crazy!”
“Right, well, you sound delusional, Rome,” Shiv tried telling him. You could tell she was trying to lay it easy on him and be nice, but it didn’t quite sound that way.
The siblings argued some more. Roman kept denying that Logan was dead, while Shiv gritted out that he’s gone. 
“All I’m saying is that we don’t know for sure. And—and until we do know, it’s just not a very nice thing to say, is it? So just fucking stop!” Roman yelled the last word out, and it ricocheted across the room like a bullet would. 
They all fell silent for a moment.
“Okay,” Shiv said. She looked to be on the verge of crying again. With quiet, reassuring words, Connor wrapped an arm around his little sister and let her lean against him.
“Roman,” you said, making his eyes snap to you. They were red and looked so tired. You were sure yours looked just the same. When you spread your arms as a non-verbal invite, he surged forward and buried himself into your embrace. The two of you held onto each other as if you were both lifeboats for one another in this vast sea of fucking nothing.
Kendall, disillusioned, went back to staring out the window.
“He didn’t want us together,” Roman choked out, forehead drooped onto your sternum. “He fucking—he told me to end it, and I didn’t listen, and I just never listened to him…”
Both your hands rubbed up and down his back. “I know. I know, Rome. I love you even if he didn’t want me to.”
Your words made Roman’s shoulders curl closer to his chest. Closer to you. “Fuck. Me, too, okay? Me, too.”
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Half an hour later, the boat began moving away from the dock, much to all of your chagrin. 
Hugo had also come into the room, acting as a liaison. He told the lot of you that the plane-folk were starting to draft a statement to release to the news. The siblings angrily called them to ask what was going on—which did little to sway them.
Not too long after, Gerri came in to offer her condolences. Her presence made Roman all the more turbulent, and he lashed out at her, telling her to fuck off. 
Shiv asked her godmother if maybe they could stay up in the air a bit longer to give everyone some more time to think—and Roman told her to fuck off, too. At that point, you stepped in to say that it’s probably best not to delay the inevitable. Thankfully, Roman didn’t tell you to fuck off at that.
“Just to say,” Kendall said once both Hugo and Gerri hurried off to answer calls and get more information, “every single thing we say and do today… it’s all going in the memoirs, going in the fucking congressional record, it’s coming up at board meetings, it’s going in SEC filings.”
“God, Kendall,” you said, pinching the space between your brows. “Your grief is not a fucking spectacle, okay? It’s not—none of this is meant to be a performance. You can… you can be a fucking human being for once, okay?”
“No, but, listen, I’m agreeing with you,” he said, holding out a hand. “If we tell them to circle the plane around to buy us time, then some fucking rumors start up, and we get crucified for being cold-hearted, or—I don’t even know. We’re highly liable to misinterpretation right now. What we do today will always be what we did the day our father died. So I’m agreeing with you, Y/N. We shouldn’t delay the inevitable.”
Nose flaring, Shiv shook her head in a frustrated manner.
“So, you know, let’s grieve and whatever,” Kendall continued on, “but not do anything that restricts our future freedom of movement.”
“Okay,” you whispered, nodding in agreement. “Okay, Kendall. We’ll be careful.”
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The siblings stepped out to discuss drafting statements themself, and you told them you’d arrange transport off the boat to the airport, where they’d be landing. 
Before you reconvened with them, however, you dropped by to see Connor one last time.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered with a frown that felt strangely childish, enveloping him in a hug. “I’m sorry your dad died, and I’m sorry I won’t be here to see you get married. Everything’s gone to shit and I hate that I can’t do anything about it.”
“It’s okay,” Connor said, rubbing your back comfortingly, not unsimilar to what you did with Roman. “It’s okay, kiddo. I appreciate you coming here to tell me.”
You pulled away, using the back of your palm to brush away your tears. “I got you, uhm—as a wedding present, I got you an oil painting kit. It’s not much, but I thought it’d be fun to try it out with you one day. I guess I just didn’t think—I thought I’d be able to give it to you after the ceremony, but… I don’t think I’ll be around. I’m sorry.”
Connor nodded, and smiled at you sadly. “It’s like you haven’t changed at all in twenty years, you know that? I feel so fuckin’ old.”
“Have a happy wedding, Con,” you told him. With that, you turned on your heel and headed off, breathing out a sigh of relief upon seeing a smaller boat right by the one you were on, ready to take you back to land.
One boat ride, one helicopter flight, and one private car later, you arrived at Teterboro Airport, where their plane touched down. Logan was announced dead at arrival. Roman balked and nearly puked up what little he’d eaten on the boat—you rubbed his back and told him everything was okay as he dry-retched nothing in the airport bathroom. There were already dozens of news reporters and journalists flooding the entrance-way for the impromptu press conference the Roy siblings were holding.
Before the sun was down, the news was spilled at the hands of Shiv. It was short and concise, over in no more than a minute. Questions, questions, and more questions—none of which were answered.
“Are we going to go see him?” Roman asked once it was all over. The plane was in view.
“Do we have to?” Kendall replied.
“I mean, he’s not going to be angry if we don’t,” Shiv replied. The rest of you smiled in silence.
Then, Kendall opened his arms, and the four of you leaned into a brief group hug. You kissed Shiv’s cheek and told her to get home safe. She nodded and took her leave. 
Roman jutted his head in the direction of the plane. “I’m gonna go see him. You coming, Kendall?” 
The oldest scuffed his shoe into the concrete pathway. “I’m gonna—I’ll watch him come down from here.”
“Okay,” said Roman. There was no surprise in his tone, but it lacked any sort of harsh judgment. 
“I’ll come with you,” you told Roman, taking his hand. “If you’re going to go see him, I’ll come with you.”
“Didn’t expect anything less,” he replied, eyes soft and sad. 
With a nod of goodbye at Kendall, the two of you left him to stand by the airport exit. 
“Do you think he would’ve been okay with us being together eventually, though?” Roman asked after a while, growing increasingly nervous as you neared the plane. Even now that his father was dead, he was still grasping for his approval.
There was a moment of contemplative silence. You wondered if you truly knew the answer to that, or if you were simply feeding into the kind-hearted caricature of a man Logan often didn’t live up to. 
“I think so,” you replied. Roman squeezed your hand. “I think he would’ve been proud of us for sticking together, even if he didn’t want us to at first. He would’ve respected you for it, eventually, because you didn’t take his shit.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.” You beckoned to the stairs leading up into the plane’s cabin. “You ready?”
“No.” Roman’s jaw squared. “I’m scared, I think. But I have to go see him. You don’t have to come, you know. You don't have to be so fucking good all the time. You can just leave if you want to.”
With a contemplative hum, you nodded once after barely giving his words any thought. “I know I don’t have to be here. I know it all, Rome. But I’ll come with you anyway. Anywhere you go.”
Roman raised your conjoined hands, kissed your knuckles in an appreciative manner, and led the way inside.
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teyamsgrl · 2 years ago
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Hi Jade! Do you think you'd be up to do Neteyam fic where he and the reader are sweet on each other but because she's younger than him and friends with Lo'ak he doesn't wanna go that route with her so he distances himself from her and he starts vetting available girls in the clan as a distraction and this makes the reader decide to put her needs first and she starts thinking about future mates since Neteyam isn’t seemingly worried about her. But then a rumor starts that either Lo'ak and reader are to be mates or someone else is courting her and this pushes Neteyam to stake his claim and make her his.
❗️MDNI ❗️
hi!!!! oh my goddddd this idea is amazing, everyone say THANK YOU ANON 🗣️ jealous and in love neteyam woowowowowo i'm dead already - also this gif is so fucking crisp and clear holy fuck he is so fine respectfully
p.s: sorry it took me forever to get this completed! had some writer's block along with uni starting again 🥲
just a distraction ✧ neteyam
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°˖➴ warnings: fem omatikaya reader, agedup!neteyam, dom!neteyam, jealous!teyam, younger!reader, sub!reader, friends to lovers, slow burn??, dirty talk, oral f & m receiving, missionary 😮‍💨 - paskalin: honey
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despite being lo'ak's age and his best friend, you and neteyam got along extremely well. this 'getting along' also included a lot of unsaid feelings and the romantic tension between you both was unbelievably visible yet neither of you ever said a word. your actions showed enough though; the extra long hugs, the touches as you pass each other, the undivided attention as you teach each other new skills, the looks you share throughout the day. you were so obviously in love with neteyam and you figured he maybe felt the same; that is until he started to avoid you a week ago. it hurt. it hurt so bad.
what made it even worse was that he was going around the village and chatting up all the girls, showing off and being touchy. it made your blood boil as you watched him because that should be you. as you watch him speak to kai'ra, a very skilled hunter, you start to snap out of it. clearly neteyam doesn't want you so why are you sitting here pining over him? what's the fucking point? sure, it sucked to accept that you would never be with neteyam like you had anticipated for a long time but there was no point in sulking about it. there were many other desirable men in the clan and you figured that you'd find the right one eventually.
"i heard that y/n is being courted, is that true, lo'ak?" neytiri questions as the sully family sits together in their hut eating an evening meal. neteyam almost chokes on the food in his mouth, eyes wide and jealousy rising in his chest. "yeah, by ät’uk and i think someone else too" lo'ak responds to his mother nonchalantly before continuing to eat. there are other men attempting to court y/n? what had he done? neteyam couldn't deny his feelings for you, they were almost overwhelming. it was hard for him to put distance between you both, but he felt that it was right due to the fact that you are younger and best friends with his little brother. this was clearly a mistake. the pit in his stomach was haunting, just knowing there were other men chasing after you had him anxious and on top of that, angry. neteyam set his bowl down and stood up abruptly, telling his family that he just needed some air and to walk by himself. he rushed out of the hut, turning left to head to where he knew you'd be; tree of voices.
you went to the tree of voices every night before eclipse to visit your late father, the visits always bringing you peace. just as you detach your queue from the tree, you hear someone approaching. you rarely saw others approach the tree of voices at this time of night, so you got a bit startled naturally. "it's just me", you hear that familiar voice you love so much. your heart swelled as he came into the light expelled by the tree, you had missed him despite his actions. "neteyam.." you say, nervously shifting to stand up and face him. "is ät’uk courting you?" he asks matter of factly, a glow of jealousy in his amber eyes. "uh... he has been trying, yes, so has tar'ete" you answer him, observing the way his nose scrunches at your words. "well, that's not gonna happen" he takes a step closer to you, now chest to chest. "and you get to decide that for me? that's funny, especially since you've been avoiding me" your tone is harsh, but it was true, what right did he have to state his opinion when he left you in the dust?
"look- i just thought that since you're younger and lo'ak's best friend it would be better to not initiate something with you, but" his hands move to grab your hips, butterflies fluttering in your stomach. "it was a mistake. i talked to all these other girls and i felt nothing, then i heard you were being courted and i just- you're mine and i won't let anyone else have you" he breathes out, pressing his forehead to yours and allowing his lips to ghost over yours. "i've always been yours, neteyam. it killed me to watch you with all those other girls.." you whisper softly, your own hands gripping his shoulders as though he could slip away any second. "i know, it was just a distraction. i'm sorry, paskalin.." the pet name effortlessly falls from his lips, said lips slowly inching closer to yours. you nod slightly, breath tickling his lips. before you can act first he presses his lips to yours, moving in sync with yours as though you had done this a million times before.
you hum into the kiss, hands running to weave into his braids as his tongue slips into your mouth, gliding along your own tongue. his hands on your hips pull them against his, bulge pressing against you and bringing more wetness between your legs. "neteyam" you whine out softly, grinding into his bulge and pulling out a moan from him. "y/n..." he sighs as he watches you sink to your knees, hands untying his loincloth from his tail that is swishing around in excitement. your eyes widen slightly as his cock bounces out of the confines of his loincloth, hard and leaking already. you lick the tip softly, his head falling back from the sensation. "wanna be yours..." you murmur, kissing along his shaft. "you are, i promise" he moans out as your mouth engulfs his tip, sucking and gradually taking in his entire length.
you start bobbing your head up and down, gagging slightly as his tip hits the back of your throat. "that's it, fuck..." neteyam's hands hold your head as he thrusts gently into your mouth, your mouth his to use. he moans as he continues, the whining and choking sounds turning him on even further. he pulls you off of him and you gasp for air, hand wrapping around his length to stroke him. "no- it's your turn, paskalin" he holds out his hands for you and you grab them, standing up and facing him once again. he is now the one to drop to his knees, hands swiftly removing your loincloth in seconds. he grabs your left leg, hoisting it over his shoulder so your glistening hole is on display. his arms keep you steady on one leg while he leans in, tip of his tongue gently flicking over your clit. you shudder at the touch and whine out his name softly, bringing a smirk to his lips. he leans in again and brings your clit into his mouth, suckling on it like there's no tomorrow.
neteyam moves downwards, tongue plunging into your hole and lapping at your wetness while he leaves marks on your thighs from how tight his grip is. "teyam-" you whine, hands holding his head not only for stability but out of pure pleasure. he hums against you, vibrations shooting through your body as his mouth continues it's assault on you. his one hand moves back to grab the plush of your ass, lightly spanking as he shoves his face further into you. "feels good" you squeak out, hips bucking into his mouth frantically. "yeah? wanna cum on my cock babygirl?" he mumbles between licks to your clit. "please yes" you gasp and lock eyes with him, allowing him to lie you flat on your back.
neteyam crawls over top of you, one hand beside your head as the other lines his cock up with your entrance. the pressure of his tip at your hole has you mewling already, hands reaching for his biceps as he begins to push in. the stretch is intense yet the most pleasurable thing you had ever felt, your back arching in an instant. his breath is shaky as he bottoms out, pulling away slightly to ram right back into you. he leans to press his forehead on yours as he settles on a rhythm, breath grazing your lips as your rock back and forth together. "shit-" he groans as your walls squeeze him on each thrust, his fingers pressing into the dirt below you. "oh eywa..." you whine, nails dragging down neteyam's toned back.
"so good.... you're mine, aren't you?" he hums, hips jerking continuously and causing squelching sounds to fill your ears. "yours, all yours" you moan, nails digging into his back further as your orgasm begins it's fast approach. "that's right- fuck, i'm close.. where do you-" "inside, please" you beg, legs tugging him in by the waist as you begin to quiver. "okay- oh babyyy.." he groans as he pumps you full, your own orgasm releasing simultaneously. both of your breathing is heavy as you come down, bodies pressed together.
"you're amazing" he whispers, hand stroking your cheek as he lies beside you now. "so are you" you whisper back, placing your much smaller hand on top of his, staring into his amber eyes. "be my mate?" he asks, other hand resting on your stomach. "yes, of course yes" you smile, throwing your arms around his neck and pulling him close. he chuckles and wraps his arms around you as well, his strong arms keeping you as close as possible. "all we need is tsaheylu" he mumbles, smirk plastered on his face. "are you saying you want a round two?" you giggle, kissing along his jaw. "maybe..."
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