#i started t | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

perilegs · 6 months ago

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it's funny that now that i don't really have much about my body to be dysphoric about my brain makes up psychological dysphoria and it's so dumb

#''oohh only people who are attracted to men but are slightly scared of what they deem real men (not you) will be attracted to you''#''or those people AND chasers AND ppl who just see you as a curiosity to test out''#like how do i even unpack the bs my brain is throwing at me #yeah maybe some part of me believes that but the logical part of me knows it's not true #i think what's causing this is that i'm still kinda new at being stealth while passing #like yeah ive been going as leevi for the entire duration of uni and living as a man but passing regularly started happening to me after #i started t #now i only get misgendered the same amount as cis men with shoulder length hair #so like. it's happened once after starting t lmao #i think what's causing this (the psychological warfare from my brain) is the combination of stress #and me actually becoming friends with a co worker i'm not out to #listen ive been trying to hint at being trans but he was born a guy and lives as a guy so hes not very tuned out on this stuff #though his partner is nb and ive met them and they think i'm cis too which i think is hilarious bc i feel like #i'm v easy to clock for trans ppl #though idk im fagging it up quite a bit so it makes me pass extra well so #anyways #im a bit conflicted about the situation #im not going to outright tell him i think but i'm not going to hide it if it comes up #which i know i dont have to do but i want to #we'll probably go swimming together this summer so if that doesnt make him realize it hes a lost case and i dont #need to worry about it lmaoo #also i bought shorts that arent sport shorts and they looked normal on me so im literally unstoppable #but yea thank u for listening to me i just needed to ramble #leevi talks

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spitblaze · 1 year ago

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considering how many transmascs were legitimately way angrier BEFORE starting T and have since calmed down significantly have we perhaps considered that maybe the reason so many cis dudes are angry and aggressive isn't because of testosterone but maybe. like. personal issues. unmet needs. a social climate that teaches them that there are only like three acceptable emotional outlets for men max and one of them is being angry and shouting

#spitblaze says things #source: i got angry SO easily before i started t #i had jokes about the list of things you could say to me that would make me rant and rave in a fury #i still have things that piss me off but im not like. to that degree #doin numbers

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hilacopter · 4 months ago

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tbh ryoko kui cooked with this one why is this the funniest image I have ever seen

#i have been looking at it for 2 days at this point #she is SMALL and LONG #the idea of actual cat-sized izutsumi butters my biscuits <- (g/t loving freak)#love the implication that marcille and falin own izutsumi in the modern AU because cat mom marcille is literally so real #she is 1000% a cat person. in the same way i am a cat person i think where i am good with them but annoy the shit out of them.#oh no. am i gonna start meshiposting now.#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #daydream hour #marcille donato #izutsumi

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rika-mortis · 3 months ago

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Bonus:

#fairly oddparents #fairly oddparents a new wish #fop a new wish #the fairly oddparents #timmy turner #denzel crocker #aj #fop aj #fop #a new wish #fairly odd parents a new wish #fairly odd parents #my art #fanart #I have plenty more ideas to draw for this au so hopefully I could get most of these done before my next semester starts #On one hand it's good that Timmy possibly didn’t become obsessed with finding his fairy godparents after witnessing firsthand what it did t #But at the same time it must sting for them to hear their former godkid outright deny your existence ngl #Also it's 5 am over here rn I really need to sleep oh god

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fungalnebula · 2 years ago

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What I love most about Gandalf big naturals is how much it eases my chest dysphoria. I can sleep without a shirt on now because of Gandalf Big Naturals. Knowing that the artist made the original image while recovering from top surgery and said the image was like a final parting gift from their boobs makes me feel even better about the image's effect on me. Men with big naturals makes me feel much more good about my body than those old posts on here that were like "trans men! Some men have pecs!!! So don't feel dysphoric <3". It's much more meaningful to see a hairy, bearded man with a huge H cup rack not letting his tits get in the way of his masculinity.

Most of all, Gandalf Big Naturals helped me love my body the way it is instead of hating something that's a part of me. Of course I still want top surgery but the fact that I can live with my own big naturals until then without wanting to guillotine them off is really important.

#losers lament #gandalf big naturals #I queued a drawing of Gandalf big naturals where he has a hairy chest and that one's my favorite #since I started t I've been growing chest hair and I really like how my cleavage looks with the hair #so when I saw that picture i knew that I would be able to keep the love for hairy big naturals #instead of losing them forever when my own hairy big naturals get removed #and it's like I'm giving them to him #I love the way gender expression has progressed on this webbed sight

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ftmfranknfurter · 7 months ago

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Another reason why forcemasc is so appealing, especially to mlm transmascs is that so much of the time in our relationships with men, they want to feminise us. It’s almost a cliche that every transmasc has had a bad relationship with a “bi” dude who discourages then from taking T and tries to make them use they/them or she/her pronouns. It’s nice to imagine a fantasy where someone wants us to actively transition, who finds the masculinity hot, who romanticises the changes on T.

And I can only hope that this has made more transmascs have higher standards and realise that there are people who do will love you and find you attractive because you are masculine and not because you’re their idea of a hot tomboy.

#just some thoughts I had while scrolling #I know my ex didn’t want me to start t and it gave me so much dysphoria I only noticed in hindsight #autoandrophilia #forcemasc

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keiscorner · 5 months ago

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2:53 am

"kei." no response. you know tsukishima has to get up early for work, but the window across from your bed is open, allowing the night breeze to creep in and sting your face. you could get up yourself, but that's what husbands are for, right?

you twist around, trying to wiggle out of your husband's grasp so you can take a better look at his sleeping face. he has an arm wrapped firmly around your waist, the other supporting your neck to, in his words, 'protect his ears from your constant complaints about your sore neck in the morning'.

"honey?" you poke his cheek, smiling to yourself when he grunts in response. tsukishima has always been a light sleeper. you lay in silence for a few seconds before he finally lets out a sigh, opening his eyes to look at you.

"what do you want?"

you muster up your biggest doe eyes, knowing that he hates getting out of bed just as much as you do. "close the window for me?"

"no. you do it."

you sigh dramatically, gesturing at his arms wrapped firmly around you. "i would love to, but someone is holding me hostage, so i think you're going to have to do it."

tsukishima rolls his eyes, untangling his arms from your body. "problem solved." he holds back a smile when you frown and pull the blankets away from him, turning your back towards him. you're so cute. tsukishima would do anything you ask of him without hesitation, but he can't help but tease you a bit first. he'll never get tired of your reactions, and he loves that he can be a little snarky with you.

you sigh again, this time louder and more pointed, pretending to shiver just to show your husband how cold you really are, and how cruel he is for not helping. "if only someone could hold me right now...", you trailed off.

"ok, do you want me to help you or not?" he finally gives in, getting up to reach for his glasses. you win, as usual. you turn back to face him again with a smile as bright as sunshine, and despite all of the years you've been together, his heart still stops for a second. wow. okay, maybe he is obsessed with you, but he can't help it. you've clearly worked your magic on him, considering the fact that he's getting out of the bed for you when he has to be awake in a few hours. he goes to close the windows with a firm click, walking back to his side of bed.

"kei...since you're already up...", he looks back to see your guilty smile, an empty mug in your hands. "please? last thing, i swear." he give you a look that reads, "you're lucky i love you." (you know you're the luckiest person in the world.)

he takes your mug and you hear his quiet footsteps making their way to the kitchen. he comes back, handing you a mug full of warm water. once you take a sip, he takes the mug from you again, placing it on your nightstand.

"i poisoned that," he quips, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead before finally lying down and snaking his arms around your waist, pulling you in closer to him. the only reason he hates getting out of bed is that he has to let go of you, but he doesn't need to say that. he's sure you already know.