#like without him we are just a fuckin Disaster

[that-sarcastic-writer]

Mind Games (2)

Direct cntinuation to Mind games (til we lose control) (takes place before lost time)

Ben/Soldier Boy X Supe!Fem!reader

Summary: Herogasm proves to be a disaster for everyone involved, but at least you and Ben still have each other at the end of the night. Takes places during the Herogasm episode but like I did my own shit

Warnings: explicit sexual content, minors dni, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it mfs), p in v, shower sex (pls don't try to recreate this, SB has super strength, your man does not, you might break sum), oral (f receiving), fingering, multiple orgasms, creampie, dom!Soldier Boy, praising kink, Ben calls her mean things a lot (but she likes it), choking, hair pulling, spitting, Soldier Boy cause mf is a warning on his own, typical canonical violence for this show, no use of y/n, Violet isn't her real name, just a nickname.

WC: 6.9k I'm so sorry

A/N: WHAT DID I TELL YALL MFSSS. Took me 2 years to revisit it but yk what it's fine cause every year is Soldier Boy's year. So yeah here we are. I will warn yall im not too good at writing action/fight scenes, like it made sense in my head but idk if that image translated well into the scene. I only know how to write smut im sorry. But to my Ben/Jensen girlie's, this is for you. I'll see yall in hell <3

Gif is not mine I found it on Pinterest

Universe masterlist | I no longer have a tag list so if you'd like to keep up with updates follow @midnightreadinglibrary

Fucking Herogasm. Christ, you didn't remember the last time you were here. Funny, the last time you went to a Herogasm party it was coincidentally with Ben. And it was in fact the last one you ever went to. It never felt right to go back without him. 

"Fuckin' Herogasm," Butcher laughed and shook his head, glancing back at you with intrigue, "You ever been Violet?" 

Your lips curled up a bit and you licked your lips slowly, glancing at Ben for a second before you found two pairs of curious eyes on you. 

"Yeah, every year for like ten years." You responded, and you were met with a look of disbelief from Hughie, and even Butcher had a slight glint of surprise in his eyes. Perhaps they didn't take you as the orgy, drugs and depravity type of supe, not that you blame them, that never truly was your idea of fun. But you weren’t entirely innocent either. "I'm serious. You can ask Ben if you don't believe me." 

Both men gave Ben a long glance and he laughed, shrugging at you. 

"She ain’t lying, I took her to her first one, in 74' was it? Should've seen her, such a pretty doe-eyed lil’ thing, with a face like hers she fooled everyone." 

"Oh, yeah, you showed innocent little me all the ropes. It was very educational." You rolled your eyes, trying to hide the small grin on your face, and Ben had one of his own. 

For a moment you forgot neither of the other two men quite understood whatever was going between you and Ben, so you missed the uncomfortable look on their faces. 

"Oh, I showed you a hell of a lot more than just the ropes, sweetheart." 

"And I'll show you both the barrel of a gun if I have to endure another second of your trip down erotic memory lane. Can we focus here?" Butcher groaned, looking both annoyed and disturbed by your relationship, like a parent who was tired of keeping his two horny teenagers in line. 

You exchanged a look with Ben, eyes big and lips pursed as you tried not to laugh and you gave him a look of having just been scolded. He simply rolled his eyes and half paid attention to Hughie and Butcher as they went back and forth about who was going in first. 

You, as always, just stood there and observed, absentmindedly twirling your knife between your fingers as you listened to them agree that Hughie should go in first so you could be in and out as quickly as possible. In between your own priorities, Ben being the main one, you had almost forgotten why you were here in the first place. Despite the fact that you were picking off Payback's members one by one, you quickly realized this wasn't for you, or Ben and his plot for revenge. No, it was about Butcher getting his. And the two of you were simply there to make it happen. 

You had begun to wonder if this was all there was to it, a means to an end, and in reality neither you or Ben had much of a chance to make it out this revenge mission alive. But if there was something you knew for sure, it was that you would die before you let anything happen to Ben again. Deep down, you hoped he would do the same for you. 

"I'm gonna go check the area before we go in, make sure there aren't any surprises." Butcher announced after a minute or two of waiting, Hughie not being back yet. He started walking, but not before turning to glance at you both with narrowed eyes, "And you two behave, last time I left you cunts alone you broke a bathroom." 

You did a mocking salute to him and snorted when he rolled his eyes at you, grumbling something you didn't quite hear as he began to walk away. He was out of your sight pretty quickly and you could already feel Ben's intense gaze burn on your face. You ignored it at first, but when he stood in front of you, eyes never leaving you, you had no choice but to look at him. You stopped your fidgeting and you looked up at him expectantly as you leaned back against a tree.

"I don't need to read your mind to know you want to tell me something, what's up?" 

"What you said back at the motel, did you mean it?" He questioned, leaning close to your face as he placed a hand beside your head. You stared at him for a second, trying to dig in your mind for whatever it was that he meant. You found his green eyes and you realized. 

Ah. The three fucking words. 

"Seriously Ben?" You groaned, your head falling to the side with annoyance, but more of all you wanted to avoid his gaze, avoid the shame of having confessed your deepest feelings, knowing feelings wasn't something either of you ever talked about let alone ever admitted to. Because feelings meant vulnerability, and vulnerability meant weakness. And weakness wasn't something either of you would ever admit to.

He grabbed your chin, grip tight as he forced you to look at him, "Did you? ‘Cause I meant what I said, all of it." 

Your face softened and your lips slightly curved into a tiny smile. You never wanted to search his mind without his permission, it was like a line you never liked to cross, but you didn't need to this time. Just by looking into his eyes you always knew. You could tell a lot by looking into someone’s eyes. You searched his eyes for any kind of deceit or even manipulation, but you didn't find any. You knew what he meant, and coming from him, it meant everything. 

"Yeah," You sighed softly, "I meant what I said." 

"Good." His pink lips curved into a satisfied smirk as he squeezed your face and leaned down, capturing your lips into his own. It was slower, no rushed and desperate touches like before, but he still kissed you hard. There was nothing gentle about it, but was there ever anything gentle about him? 

His tongue slipped into your mouth as he dropped his hand, resting it on the column of your neck. He pressed his armored chest against yours, pretty much pinning you against the tree. His mouth was so skilled, like he knew exactly how to take your breath away in seconds, he knew you that well. You would never allow a man to have this much control over you. But it was always different with him. Your hands found his long strands as you explored his mouth, and you pulled hard. You felt him groan against your mouth and he squeezed your neck in response. You gasped, the sound quickly fading into a soft moan. He pulled back and watched with amusement the look of pure ecstasy on your face as he squeezed your throat. 

"You fucking slut, you still get off to me hurting you, don't you?" He bit his lip as he released your throat, thumb brushing over the skin he knew would bruise, just like everybody else's, even if it was for a little bit. 

You inhaled deeply, the short lack of airflow making you dizzy, but in the most delicious way possible. You opened your eyes, finding his green ones and god you wished nothing but to just ditch the mission and go somewhere where he could take you, over and over again. 

"Are we here to get revenge or are we here to get your dick wet? ‘Cause I'm getting some real mixed signals here." You mumbled, breath heavy and he chuckled. He leaned down, pressing his lips to your jaw before he moved them to your ear. 

"I'm gonna fuck you so hard I'm gonna break a hell of a lot more than just a mirror." He coaxed. The way he spoke in your ear made you rub your thighs together and the pool forming in your panties was impossible to ignore. It was embarrassing how quickly he could pull you apart and do with you what he pleased. "When we get back. Now pull yourself together, we're on a mission." 

And just like that he was standing a few feet away from you. He was looking behind his shoulder, almost as if he could hear someone. And of course, just in time for you to somewhat regain your composure, Butcher came back. Though it wasn't before you locked eyes with Ben one more time as you tried to control your breathing, and the cocky bastard winked at you, lips curled into a shit eating grin before Butcher actually approached you both. 

This motherfucker. 

"All clear. The twins are in there. You shouldn't have a problem going in," He said to Ben, but then looked at you, "You, though, you might get some attention. Pretty girl, dressed in black leather and strapped with knives, that's some BDSM shit if I've seen one." 

"Okay and?" You frowned, now standing by both men.

"Just stay close to him, people might recognize you and approach you. Do what you can to keep a low profile. You might have to get your hands a bit dirty." He looked between you and Ben. You stared at him with a small frown at first, but when he raised his eyebrows at you, you quickly realized what he meant. 

"Wouldn't be the first time." Ben commented with a chuckle when he caught on. You looked at him, slightly unimpressed by his lack of discretion but you simply rolled your eyes. 

Butcher sighed heavily, clearly done with your antics by then and he simply motioned you off with an unimpressed expression, "Off you go, ya dirty cunts." 

"Looks like you might get your dick wet after all." You commented to Ben as you both headed off to the house. 

He chuckled, shooting you a glance as you stood in front of the door. You were both eager to get this over with, you more than him. It was one thing for him to be able to face the assholes that betrayed him, and you were happy to do it with him. But the idea of being around dozens of supes, in an environment where there were no rules, no respect and no boundaries, made you uneasy. You didn't know if you could handle that many voices all at once. It had been a long time since you had been around other Supes, let alone that many, and you had made that decision for a reason. 

Almost as if he could feel the anxiety radiate from you, you felt a large hand fill your own. Confused, you looked down and saw he had intertwined his fingers with your own. "There's nothing to be nervous about, sweetheart, it wouldn't be the first time we do this." 

"I haven't been around other supes since…" You inhaled deeply, your throat slightly closing up at the memory. The last time you stepped foot at Vought Tower, when you realized you couldn't do it anymore. Ben looked at you, eyebrows slightly knitted into a frown, "It's been a long time is all." 

"Just stay by my side, nobody will lay a hand on you. I'll always protect you, remember?" He gave your hand a slight squeeze and the calm yet assertive ring in his voice made you feel almost at ease. Almost. 

You stayed silent, needing all your energy and focus to keep the dozens of voices beginning to infiltrate your mind one by one. The sound of Ben speaking as a very naked man opened the door sounded far, distant, you didn't catch much of what they said. You only knew to move when you felt Ben tug you along. Now the sound of your racing heart was almost as loud as the voices. So fucking many people here. So many Supes. So many voices. All at once. It was deafening. It disgusted you, to have to hear every passing thought these depraved beings had. You didn’t realize you started digging your blunt nails into Ben’s gloves.

It didn’t hurt, but your enhanced strength definitely made him feel the tightening grip of your shaking hands. He stopped and looked at you with a twisted frown.

“The fuck is wrong with you now? You look like you saw your father.” 

You eyes snapped up to find him looking back at you with both confusion, and his version of concern. You opened your mouth but you could only stammer but no words actually came out. You couldn’t think. It was so loud. Your lip quivered ever so slightly as you felt your chest start to grow heavy. Ben saw the look on your face, the way your eyes were frantically looking around the room, your jaw wound up so tight he thought you’d break it. The last time he saw you like this was when you first joined Payback and didn’t have full control of your abilities. 

“Stop that, right now.” He gripped your shoulders hard, really fucking hard, enough to make you shift your focus on him for a moment. You looked at him with wide eyes. “Hey, I need you to focus. Get your head under control. I need you to have my back here, okay?”

“I… I don’t.. I can’t get them to stop. They won’t stop.” You said, so close to being on the verge of tears. “There’s so many, I can’t get them to shut the fuck up. I--” 

“Hey,” He shook you ever so slightly, leaning in close to your face. “The fuck did I just say? Get. yourself. Together. You used to tune ‘em out, remember? So tune them out.” 

You breathed in, your chest rising as you tried to drown out the noise, focus on his face, on his voice. But you couldn’t. You hadn’t been around this many people in nearly a decade.

“I can’t. I just can’t. I can’t be here. I’m sorry.” You shook your head frantically and tried to slip out of his grip but he didn’t let you. 

“I need you here. Just—hey,” he grabbed your jaw, looking out of the corner of his eyes to make sure you weren’t bringing in too much attention before he met your teary eyes. “Just look at me. I’m right here. Remember you used to tune everyone else out and only focus on my voice, hm? Focus on my thoughts, okay? It’s just you and me, fuck everyone else.” 

You stared at him, the green in his eyes seeming more and more green the longer you looked. You even saw a ring yellow in there. His voice. His thoughts, they had always calmed you, centered you. The voices grew more and more distant the longer you looked at him. You listened to his voice as his thoughts became your own. Until only the sound of his voice was in your head. Your breath was shaky as you closed your eyes, a laugh of relief leaving your lips.

He held your face for a little longer, his deep frown less harsh as he watched your face slowly visibly relax and the tension left your body.

“Are we good?”

“Yeah, we’re good.” You exhaled deeply and nodded at him, feeling like you were slowly regaining control of yourself. “Let’s go find the terror twins.” 

You walked around this house for what felt like hours. But it didn’t help that you were being stopped every five minutes by every naked Supe you walked by. Ben was anything but amused.

“I swear to fucking Christ if one more of these slimy jizz-covered fuck faces asks you to use your knives on them I will actually shove my shield up their ass.” Ben grumbled with a look of disgust on his face.

“They’d probably like that.” You had to bite your lip to stop yourself from laughing at the death glare he shot you.

“Eat shit.” You actually snorted this time, and you were full on giggling when he started mumbling curses at you as he walked off. 

You ultimately decided splitting up was probably the way to go, the house was way too big and had too many rooms, you’d find the twins quicker if you each went your own way. Ben was reluctant at first, a bit apprehensive to leave you on your own after you almost broke down earlier. But you reassured him you were fine and perfectly capable of going on your own. You ultimately realized you made the right choice. You didn’t know exactly when or how but out of nowhere you heard a loud blast in the next room and you were launched right through a wall from the blast. Pain immediately started shooting through your body at the impact. You were a Supe, sure, but you weren’t Soldier Boy, you weren’t fucking invincible. You bled and you felt pain like any human. 

It took you a good minute to understand what the actual fuck had just happened. And when you did, you almost forgot about the throbbing pain going through your body. You pushed yourself up to your feet, stumbling and holding on to walls as you dragged yourself through the rubble and burned bodies. Your jaw slightly fell open at the sight of this much mayhem. You didn’t believe in God, but fuck were you praying to a higher power for Ben to be okay. 

You managed to stay on your feet despite the pain. It would go away eventually, in a day or so, but the first few hours were brutal. Still you pushed through, determined to find Ben. You stumbled into a hallway, the walls were falling apart and chunks of cement were all around the floor. But what caught your attention was the sight that fucking American flag and blonde head of hair you had grown to despise. Your heart stopped, you were frozen. You held your breath as you realized fucking Homelander was here. And he currently had Ben pinned to a wall.

This was such a bad fucking idea. You could die a very agonizing death. A bad idea indeed. 

Adrenaline kicked in, you sprinted and with a bit of momentum you landed on Homelander’s shoulders. You were surprised he didn’t hear you coming.You were thankful he was preoccupied with Ben. Your nails dug into the side of his temples and you used all of the energy and power you had coursing through your veins, and sent that straight to his brain.

You weren’t sure if it would even tickle. You tried using your shock powers on Ben once, a long time ago, just to test out how it worked on Supes with enhanced strength, he said it felt like being electrocuted. And right about now you were praying Homelander felt something, enough to stun him at least. You could kill an average Supe if you used enough power, but you weren’t so sure if you were strong enough.

You held on, but you were struggling, commanding your body to release this much energy was mentally exhausting but the sound of Homelander groaning in pain made you smile the slightest bit. The shocks of electricity weren’t going to kill him, but it sure did hurt, and it stunned him. Nobody’s brain was invisible afterall. 

“Hurts, doesn’t it motherfucker? Your body may be indestructible but your mind can only take so much before it breaks.” You spat. Sparks were coming from your fingers as your eyes flashed bright purple. “It’s fucked when its you being held down against your will, huh?”

He screamed, stumbling around as he attempted to grab at you, but this wasn’t the first time you tried to fry someone’s brain off while on their shoulders. You gasped when you saw his laser eyes go off as he screamed, leaving indents on the wall. This split second of distraction was enough to make your focus falter, and it gave Homelander the opportunity to find a grip on you. You cried in pain when he grabbed your ankle and tossed you off. 

You landed fucking hard, it knocked the air right out of your lungs. You coughed as you attempted to get up, but Homelander was grabbing you and pulling you up by your neck before you could blink. He held you up in the air as he levitated so you couldn’t find a way to escape. He held you at arm’s length so you couldn’t reach him, either. The way his empty, ice cold eyes stared you down with evil glee as you gasped for air was terrifying. 

“I always knew you were a fucking bitch. I should’ve killed you when I had the chance. Matter of fact, I’ll do that right now.” Your eyes widened when his eyes gleamed bright red. 

Out of the corner of your eye you saw Ben behind Homelander, with a grin as he grabbed Homelander’s cape and pulled down, and he pulled really fucking hard. Your body collided with the ground roughly, landing on your side with a pained cry. But you still saw Ben throw Homelander around by his cape, and had you not been mere seconds away from death, you would have laughed at the comedic irony. You were in and out of consciousness, an aura surrounding your vision. But in between your delirium you could see Butcher and Hughie had arrived, and the three of them were taking on Homelander. It wasn’t long before the three of them had Homelander pinned down. You could feel yourself fade, your muscles give out and your mind shut off. You hadn’t used that much power since you were in Payback. 

You heard indistinct voices and shouting before everything went black. 

“The fuck are you waitin’ for? Blast this cunt!” Butcher shouted and Ben grunted.

“I can’t! Just—Fuck.” His eyes found you in the corner, bloodied and passed out. You couldn’t run away and you wouldn’t survive the blast, he knew that. “You—kid, take her, and get out here. Now!”

“No fucking way!” Hughie shouted back, and Ben felt the urge to blast him instead. 

“Do what he says, take the fuckin’ girl and go!” Butcher shouted at Hughie, catching on to what Ben was trying to do. But before any of them could do anything, Homelander blasted his lasers, screaming as he overpowered the three of them while they were distracted. And just like that he was gone. 

The three men sat in silence, in defeat. They had a chance and they blew it. Ben knew it was mostly his fault, he shouldn’t have hesitated. But he refused to ever let you get hurt. In silent anger he glared at both of them and he stood and walked over to your passed out body. He clenched his jaw as he picked your limp body and carried you. He made eye contact with Butcher and Hughie and it took all of his power not to shoot both of them in the face. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your whole body ached, and your head was founding. It was unbearable. You winced in pain as you began to peel layers of clothes off your body. God it fucking hurt. You closed your eyes as you attempted to hold back tears, only snapping back into reality when you felt Ben trace his fingers over your back. He noted every bruise and every cut. He knew they would heal, sure but it still made him seethe with anger. 

“What the fuck were you thinkin’, taking on Homelander like that? Did all the fucking pills you take for your psychosis fry all of your neurons or what?” He was so angry, and he never was exactly kind with his words. You always knew that, but it still hurt when he talked to you that way, especially when you had only been trying to help him. 

Your back was turned to him, so he couldn't see the hurt frown on your face but he did notice you huff at him and move away from his touch, refusing to look at him. 

“Okay.. Hey, no. I didn’t.. I didn’t mean it like that. Fuck.” He bit his tongue, squeezing his eyes shut with regret of his choice of words. You kept your back to him as you continued to undress. He groaned. “You would have died. And it would have been on me. I couldn’t live with that, is all.” 

“Well, I was passed out so it would have been a quick death, if that's of any consolation to you.” You answered shortly as you stripped down to your underwear. You don't think he understood that you stopped caring whether you lived or died a long time ago. 

“Okay, could you not be a bitch for two seconds?” He sighed, already annoyed by your attitude. 

“No. If you want a girl who doesn't talk back to you, go find Countess. Oh, wait, you can't ‘cause she sold you to the Russians. Guess you're stuck with me.” You answered with even more spitefulness, just to tick him off a little bit more. You didn't need to read his mind to know he was beyond pissed. You weren't exactly in a colorful mood, either. Your back was still turned to him as you tossed your bloodied gear in a corner. 

He breathed in deeply, pitching the bridge of his nose, “Violet, look at me when I'm talking to you.” 

You turned around with exasperation, your eyes open wide with a ‘what’ expression as you motioned your hands around passive-aggressively. 

“I didn't mean what I said. I know you were trying to help me… And I know that you can't always control your powers. I sometimes can't deal with my own head, I can't imagine having to deal with everybody else's.” Ben wasn't one to apologize. He was actually allergic to the words I'm sorry. You knew that. But you knew he at least tried to apologize using other words. So you listened. You knew he was having a hard time, too. “But I'm not really one to talk. I think I'm the one that's fucked in the head.” 

Your lips slightly parted at his words and you looked at him with a tiny bit of sadness. You never asked him details of what happened to him. Sure, you could look, but you never wanted to dig through his mind without his permission. He'd tell you if he really wanted to. But you didn't need to know everything to understand that what he went through messed him up. And it messed him up a lot. What happened at Herogasm was proof of that. 

“Do you want to tell me what happened at Herogasm? Don't make me look through your head, I don't want to.” You sighed softly, ultimately giving in, like you always did. Your delicate fingers dragged over his vest as you absentmindedly began to take off his gear. 

Ben stayed silent for a long time. He didn't think he even knew what happened. You were down to the last layer of the top part of his suit by the time he opened his mouth. 

“I blacked out. I don't.. I don't know what the fuck happened. I was talking to the fuck twins and then nothing. Next thing I remember is the burned bodies and the place was all fucked up.” He breathed out a little unevenly, a frown knitted deep on his face. He looked down at you when you stayed silent. “I didn't mean to. You believe that, right?” 

You did. But did he? 

“Of course I believe you.” You pressed a soft kiss to his lips, hands flat on his chest. He brought one of his hands to the back of your hair, holding your head in place. After a few seconds, you hummed, parting your lips slightly. “Can I ask you a question?” 

He nodded. 

“Why didn't you kill Homelander? You had a shot. Why didn't you take it? You would have done the whole fucking world a favor.” 

Ben stared at you with confusion. Did you really not get it? Were you that clueless or was he just that bad at showing his devotion for you? Probably the latter. 

“You saw what my blast did to the house. You wouldn't have survived that. I should have, I know, Butcher won't stop fucking reminding me. But he has nothing left to lose. Can't kill two girlfriends in the same week, y'know?” 

Your mouth fell open with indignation and you shoved at his chest, but deep down you felt warm at the fact that he chose you over his mission, for once. You still pretended to be angry at him, though. “Fucking prick.” 

He brought his lips to your jaw, leaving blunt kisses and you pretend to hate it. But the smile on your face was inevitable. 

“Wanna shower now or what?” He eventually said. That was the reason you were in the bathroom after all. 

You nodded. You could use the hot water on your bruised skin. You finished stripping, Ben just watched you with a perverted grin and smacked your ass before he stripped himself. 

He got in first, turning on the water and letting it run until steam began to fill the small space. He knew you liked it boiling hot. He didn't mind. You got in and immediately went under the shower head. You moaned in relief, the hot water running down your tense muscles, alleviating the soreness on your body. Ben watched you with a surprising amount of patience as he stood behind you. He leaned down and pressed his soft lips behind your neck, licking along the skin before he moved down your neck to your shoulder. He rested his hands on your hips, squeezing the skin as lightly as he could. You had enough bruises for one day. 

“I'm gonna take care of you tonight, m’kay?” He mumbled against your skin before he made you turn around. 

He crashed his lips against yours, rough fingers gripping your jaw as he slipped his tongue into your mouth. You whined, already craving more. When he kissed you like this, you just couldn't help yourself. 

“Need you, please.” You were breathless against his lips, your blunt nails digging into his chest desperately. He gave your bottom lip a small tug as he pulled away. 

He made you stand in front of him, his back to the shower wall as he slowly sank to his knees. Your eyes followed him longingly.

“C'mere.” He pulled you towards him, his eyes were full of greed as he made eye contact with you while he directed you to rest one of your feet on his shoulder. 

His eyes stayed locked with yours as leaned forward and licked a long stripe from your hole up to your clit. He wrapped his lips around the bud and sucked. You gasped, instantly pressing your hand against the damp wall to keep yourself up. Your mouth fell open in delight as he dragged his tongue around your sensitive clit. 

“O-Oh. Shit. Shit, Ben.” You whined softly, your free hand falling to his wet hair. He held your hip with one hand, steady vice grip holding you in place as he pushed his tongue into your hole. You swore the cry you let out was heard in the entire apartment. “Oh, my God. Fuck. That feels so good.” 

Ben hummed in approval as you wrapped your fingers around his hair and held his face against you. As if he would go anywhere. He happily kept his mouth on you, head moving up and down as he worked you with his tongue, his nose brushing your clit with every movement of his head. To say that you were so close was an understatement. You could feel your leg start to give out under you the longer you felt that heat build in your stomach. Ben was more than happy to assist you with that, too. His free hand grabbed the underside of your thigh and forced you further against his mouth until your leg was dangling over his shoulder. His other hand stayed on your hip, vice grip holding you upright effortlessly. 

His tongue found your clit one more time, and the emptiness it left was replaced by two long fingers pushing into your cunt. Your eyes rolled back as your mouth fell open in a silent cry. You leaned your forehead against the tile as you dug your nails into his scalp. Fuck, you didn't remember the last time a man ate you out, let alone ate you out like this. It felt so good you wanted to cry, you didn't even remember the pain in your body, all you could feel was pleasure. 

“Feels good, doesn't it sweetheart?” He spat into your clit as he fucked you with his fingers. If the shower hadn't been running the lewd sound of his fingers dragging in and out of your wet hole would've been so loud. But he could still hear it, and fuck did he love it. He took a second to look up at you. Such a pretty little thing when you were so close. “Oh, you wanna come don't you? Mhmm, yeah, you do. C'mon, gimme what I want. I know you can do it.” 

His tongue was back on your clit, he licked harsh stripes as he slipped his thick fingers in and out of your cunt with urgency. The sounds of him licking and sucking on your clit were almost as filthy as the sounds coming out of your mouth. His fingers fucked you without mercy, there was not a single thing gentle about his touch. It was rough and relentless. Just like he was. And it had you seeing fucking white before you even realized. 

You squeezed your eyes shut, lips parting in a silent cry as you held his face against you. But it wasn't like he'd go anywhere, if anything he kept his tongue on your swollen clit and his fingers never stopped. Tears formed in your eyes as your thighs shuddered. And when he didn't stop you were pulling at the ends of his hair to pull him off you. He groaned at this. Quite unhappy to be leaving the warm place between your thighs. 

“I wasn't done.” He looked up at you with a frown. You took in a deep breath, blowing out a small laugh as you grabbed at his face, weakly attempting to pull him back up.

“You can be down there all you want later, I just..” You swallowed hard, somewhat regaining your composure as he stood up to his full height. You pulled him down by his face and kissed him, and you kissed him fucking hard. And the taste of yourself still left on his tongue made you need him even more. “Just need you, okay?” 

“Need me where?” He grabbed your jaw, fingers sprawled out over your throat as he held your face back. He stared you down, malicious eyes full of greed as he waited for your answer. And he wouldn't give you anything until you did.

“Inside me.” You muttered through gritted teeth, almost delirious as you rubbed your thighs together with anticipation. He didn't look satisfied. You breathed in deeply, the aching need between your legs unbearable. “Need your cock, inside me, right now, Ben.” 

He lifted his eyebrows up in satisfaction and gave you a simple hum before he switched positions with you, without a word pressing your front against the shower wall. 

“I fuck you once and you're already acting like a pathetic whore? Okay. But you better fucking take my cock like the good fuck doll you've always been, hm?” He kicked your legs apart with his knee, his back pressing you further into the wall as he pressed the head of his cock against your entrance. You took a deep breath. “Yeah, you're gonna take this cock like a good lil’ fuck doll.” 

You gasped when he pushed himself inside with a snap of his hips, but it quickly turned into a moan when he pushed himself to the hilt, hips rutting against your ass. You dug your nails into nothing as you closed your eyes, taking in the delicious feeling of his thick cock stretching your walls.

“What a tight fucking cunt.” He grunted, gripping your hips, not wasting any time. He barely gave you time to adjust. “So fucking wet. Just for me, huh?” 

You were nodding against the wall instantly, pushing your ass back against him as he fucked you without mercy. You felt his lips on your shoulder as he leaned over you. The lewd sound of slapping skin was drowned out by the shower running but you could hear it clear as fucking day. 

“Yes! Mhmm feels so good.” You moaned softly, mindlessly reaching behind you to touch him, any part of him. Your fingers found his beard as you ran your hand over his face desperate to feel him, then you found his hair, and you latched on for dear life as he drilled into you. 

“Yeah? Like how my cock feels in your guts? You missed it, didn't you?” He pressed the side of his face into your head, allowing himself to close his eyes and soak the feeling of your nails on his scalp, he could even feel the faintest bit of electricity shooting through your fingers. He fucking loved it. 

“Yes! God yes.” You couldn't even describe how much. 

Ben smirked at this as he wrapped his arm over your chest and his fingers found your throat. He forced your head back, making you look at him. 

“Open your mouth,” He ordered, he held his finger to your pulse as he felt the fast rate of your heartbeat. You did as he said, and with a huff he spat in your mouth. “Slut. Swallow it.” 

How he could so easily break you down to nothing and treat you like no other man could, truly was beyond your understanding. But your mind didn't have to understand it. Your body just did it. You felt a pool of wetness seep through you at the damn near animalistic groan that rumbled in his throat. 

“You're such a good fucking girl.” He spat, pressing his lips against yours in a messy filthy kiss. You could barely keep your mouth open, not with the way he was so determined to make you fall apart for him. “You're my good fucking girl.” 

“I want to come. Please I—fuck.”  Your words were broken as your whole body burned up, and it wasn't from the hot water. 

“Of course, you do. It just feels so good, doesn't it?” He squeezed your throat harder, only choked out sounds could leave your mouth as he slipped his other hand to your swollen clit and rubbed harsh circles. 

Your orgasm hit you so hard you didn't realize it until you were shaking violently, your eyes rolled back into your head as you fucked yourself on his cock. Not that he ever stopped. He moaned loudly at the feeling of your wetness seeping on him. The wet sound of his cock slapping against your cunt made him want to come, too. 

“Fuck. Fucking Christ Violet. C'mon, make me come. Fuck yourself on my cock just like that. Be a good fuck doll for me, that's it.” His hand left your throat to pull at your hair. He dug his fingers deep into your scalp as his face fell on your shoulder. With a deep grunt he held you down on him. “Fucking take it, that's it, girl. Just like that. Fuck.” 

You could feel your mixed releases slip down your thigh. You sighed deeply, allowing yourself to close your eyes in ecstasy as he pressed his lips to your jaw. You hummed softly, reaching behind you to run your fingers through your hair. 

“I never want to leave this cunt. Feels so fucking good.” He muttered against your skin. 

You laughed softly, eyes still closed, you breathed heavily, “You're gonna have to eventually.” 

“Like fuck I am.” 

Both of his hands were on your hips and he turned you around. You whimpered softly at the emptiness he left you, but it was quickly replaced by choked out gasp when he grabbed both of your thighs and effortlessly hoisted you up around his waist. Your back was pressed against the tile wall and he slipped his cock inside you without a warning.

“Ben—” 

“You wanted my cock inside you? Well you better fucking take all of it. Every fucking inch ‘til I say so. You want it, don't you?” He spat, already fucking into you like you were nothing more than a toy. He held you up by your thighs as he kept them wide open so he could take as much as he wanted. And that he did. “Of course you do, this cunt is all mine to with as I fucking want. That ain't never gonna change.” 

What a long fucking night you were going to have. But you'd take a million of this over another day without him in your life. And this? This was all you ever wanted. You didn't need anything else, just him.

[little-miss-dilf-lover]

May I ask for a request of tangerine x reader who works with Tan and Lemon. Idiots in love type. And on a mission one takes a bullet for the other or does something stupid during a mission to keep the other safe? and then when they are in the clear they get into a big argument about how stupid the other was and like all the yelling and arguing leads to slipping out a love confession. You can choose who gets injured tan or reader.

Also, I could totally see Lemon in the back just watching them argue sipping on some water that isn’t poisoned.

hii sunshine! love love love it! thanks for requesting, hope you like it 💌 @thewinterv I combined this with your request, hope you don’t mind 🤍

HONESTY HOUR.

tangerine x implied fem!reader

word count. 792

warnings. couple blood mentions

Missions were always complicated with Tangerine. Not because he’s difficult to work with or unskilled, but instead it was your feelings towards him that made working with him so tricky. Confusing feelings pertaining to the unspoken, unacknowledged connection between you.

And because of that, you never knew where you stood with each other. You each knew there was something there, a spark as such, but neither of you would dare speak on it. These repressed emotions have been marinating for far too long, the approaching expiry date much like that of a ticking time bomb. 

Today's mission was particularly challenging: you and Tangerine were tasked to retrieve something —you still were unsure of what exactly— while Lemon retrieved the other. You’d all often split on missions, though today two diversions were needed, and without a moment to think on it, you found yourself following after Tangerine. 

In hindsight, it may have been stupid – the current bullet wound in your lower arm acting as a giant looming ‘I told you so.’ As soon as you and Tan were rushed into a trap —a setup— it all kind of went blank, and you fought on autopilot without a single comprehensive thought. 

You were hardly aware that you were hit until Tangerine noticed it – the trail of blood leaking from your arm and on the floor in an inconsistent pattern. 

“What the fuck have you done?” Tan yells, eyes widening as he rushes over to you – jumping over the small pile of dead bodies.

“I don’t know,” you shout back, looking down at your arm in panic. “I don’t know.”

“Oh fuckin’ hell,” he continues his yelling for some apparent reasoning. “God, this is a fuckin’ disaster,” he says, moving a hand to cover the wound in your arm, his palm firm over the small hole – trying to apply pressure. 

“It’s starting to hurt,” you wince, tugging your arm away. The adrenaline beginning to wear off.

He holds onto your elbow with his other hand, keeping you still and stopping you from pulling from his attempt of help.

“Keep bloody still, man,” he furrows, eyes narrowing at you for a brief moment. “Knew you should’ve gone with Lemon.”

“Well if I did, you’d be dead. So you’re welcome,” you retort, eyes squinting at him in that same frustrated way.

“Yeah, well too late for that now, ain’t it.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” you snark, snatching your arm away – holding over the wound in the same way he did. “Don’t have to be such a dick to me all the time, okay? I’m trying.”

“You never fuckin’ think. You always throw yourself in danger and I have to come and bail you out,” he scoffs, staring you down. 

“I never ask you to.”

He chuckles, the sound amused. “Oh, come off it.”

“I don’t need you to treat me like I’m a little princess,” you retort once more. “I don’t need your help, okay? I’m fine on my own.”

“Well maybe that’s our fuckin’ problem then,” he says, voice far calmer now. 

“What does that mean?” you ask, tone softening like his. “What do you mean?”

He shakes his head, exhaling heavily. “Forget it. I don’t care anymore,” he scoffs. “We gotta get back to Lem and get you sorted.”

And as he goes to leave, walking past you, you grab a hold of his arm to halt him. “What do you mean by that?” you question, eyes darting over his face.

“Nevermind.”

“No,” you tug his arm, extending your neck to meet his eyeline. “Tell me.”

He sighs, purposely avoiding your eyes. “I care about you, alright?” he confesses, speaking almost reluctantly. 

You move to stand in front of him, making him face you – forcing him to look at you. You smile faintly at him, the softness in your eyes silently prompting him to say what else he was thinking.

“I like you, okay? I don’t wanna see you hurt,” he admits. “Happy now?”

You nod sincerely, smiling at him. “That’s why I always go with you… sounds stupid, but I want to make sure you’re safe.”

“Yeah?” he says softly, a faint grin lining his lips. “So what’re you saying?” he chuckles, pushing you into a confession like you did him.

“I’m saying,” you pause. “I’m saying I like you.”

“You do?” he takes a step closer.

And before you have a moment to reply, you hear footsteps approach, the presence snapping you from this little honesty round with Tangerine. “Oi, there you fuckers are,” Lemon shouts, spotting you both. “Got shit to do, now chop chop.” And when he sees each of your faces, he can’t help but laugh. Both of you looked so guilty. “About to finally do it, weren’t you?”

I fear this may be total ass

[axolotlbottle]

❝Like father, like son❞

Art done by my bestie @jester0jpeg !! We both made our own versions / lore of the postal dudes & postal series!!

Postal dude 1 with his son (little kid-postal dude 2! Who we call "the postal kid!").

We actually gave them names, too! (Sorry, they're not P names, but I could care less. Feel free to call them Postal dude and Postal kid if it bothers you that much).

PD1's name is Michael Toddhunter, and his son's (PD2) name is Aster Toddhunter (hehe get it? As in "disaster").

Preface: This takes place AFTER the first postal game. This is an AU of sorts, so just erase the ending of the game + a bunch of other things, and have Michael fuck off somewhere, nobody ever knowing his identity so he gets away with everything. That was a "TLDR" explanation of it. We could maybe explain this better on a different post in the future.

Anyways! Here's some lore we have about them:

Michael is the Command Sergeant Major for U.S army's RI Arsenal. Yes, he did serve in the army before going postal in the first game. Don't ask how he got up to that rank because god knows I don't know either.

He and Aster live in the Quad cities, Illinois, aka some fuck ass midwestern region of cities that only gets some attention from the John deere company that hogs the area. Fuck john deere.

Michael is a single dad. He somehow managed to win all custody over Aster. He doesn't talk about his ex-gf.

They live in a house that's next to a trailer park, so they're not exactly dirt fuckin' poor but they ain't buying branded food either. They're still trailer park trash without living directly in the trailer park though.

Michael has tried to give Aster some sense of normality (sorta) but Aster clearly is not cut out to be a normal child. He's very rowdy, violent, and bullies the neighborhood kids (if you get the reference, you're cool).

Michael calls Aster "My little wild thing" (reference to Aster's favorite book; where the wild things are).

When Aster was 5, for Christmas, Michael gifted him a black cat he bought for $10 at the pet store ( he didn't question it). Michael cruelly didn't think the cat would last long, but that cat might as well outlive him. Aster named the cat "Kostroma" and has shoved his dad's guns up it's ass and used it as a silencer to shoot at beer bottles in their backyard. Kostroma hasn't died (nor appears to be scarred or traumatized), no matter what Aster has put him through. He's like some weird immortal cat (who surprisedly loves Aster as much as Aster loves him). Michael and Aster don't question it.

Aster loves uncrustables. His addiction literaly is grape jelly uncrustables. He has to have one once a day or else he'll start wreaking havoc in the neighborhood.

Michael brings Aster to work sometimes (usually when Aster gets kicked out of school or is being too insufferable for the neighborhood). He can't help it, and it's not like anybody can give him shit for it.

That's all we'll share for now!! Hopefully we'll post more in the future!! Me and my bestie have been working on this since like late May, and we plan to continue to work on it >;). I'll leave ya'll with this doodle I did of Kostroma cat.

[lvrsturniolo]

“a boy two boys who are jacked and kind..”

‘Slim Pickins’

dividers by @bernardsbendystraws 💓

It was one of those random afternoons where you, Matt, and Chris were just hanging out at their house(Nick had just gotten back from a space camp meeting and was taking a nap),scrolling through TikTok and tossing around ideas for what to do. Chris was laying sprawled across the couch, scrolling through his For You Page, while Matt sat at the table pretending to be interested in something on his phone. You were sitting on the floor, back against the couch, doing the same thing until Chris suddenly sat up.

“Yo, have you two seen that one TikTok trend to the Sabrina carpenter song?,” he said, grinning like he just had the best idea ever.

“The Juno pose one? Cause I’m not doing that if that’s what you’re thinking of.”

The boy giggled softly. “No, no. It’s the one to- I think the songs called slim pickins?”

You squinted at him. “What’s that?”

He flipped his phone around to show a video of some dude lifting his girlfriend onto his shoulder.

“Absolutely not,” Matt muttered from across the room without even looking up.

Chris rolled his eyes. “Don’t even start. It’s not like you’d be the only one lifting her. We’d do it together. Team effort.”

You laughed, looking between them. “You seriously think both of you could pull that off? You’re barely strong enough to pick me up in general, let alone on your shoulder.”

Chris was already hyped. “Nah, we got this, it’ll be both of us together;piece of cake! We’re stronger than we look, right Matt?”

Matt raised an eyebrow. “Speak for yourself.

“C’mon,” Chris said, nudging you. “You in? It’ll be funny. Worst case, we drop you and it’s great content.

“Worst case, I break a bone and you’re paying my hospital bill,” you shot back, but honestly, it sounded kind of fun.

Chris clapped his hands together, leaning down and kissing you softly on your forehead. “Thank you baby, it’ll be fun I promise.”

It took another ten minutes of you and Chris trying to convince Matt, but when he saw you giving him those eyes. The begging eyes,he finally caved. “Fine, but if this goes south, m’blaming both of you,” Matt grumbled.

“Yeah, yeah,” Chris said, dragging you both to the center of the living room where there was more space. “Alright, so here’s the plan. You get in the middle, we both squat down, and then we lift you up. Easy.”

“Easy for you to say,” Matt muttered, shaking his head but moving into position anyway.

The first attempt was a disaster. You couldn’t stop laughing long enough to actually get steady, and Matt kept losing his grip.

“Bro, hold her fuckin legs higher!” Chris yelled, adjusting his grip on your thigh.

“I’m trying! She keeps moving!” Matt shot back, struggling to keep his balance.

“Guys, I swear if you drop me—” you started, but you were laughing too hard to finish the sentence.

By the third try, you were all red-faced and wheezing from laughing so much. Finally, Chris and Matt managed to get you up on their shoulders at the same time, and you threw your arms out like you were on top of the world.

“WE DID IT!” Chris yelled, spinning in a circle while still holding you up.

Matt looked up at you, smirking despite himself. “Not bad, huh?”

“Alright, alright, you proved me wrong,” you said, laughing and holding onto their heads for balance.

You all stood there for a second, just laughing like idiots and feeling way too proud of yourselves. It wasn’t perfect, but it was your kind of perfect.

“Alright, one more time for the TikTok,” Chris said, already setting up his phone.

Matt groaned. “You’ve gotta be kidding me! Why weren’t we filming before?”

“Come on, Matt,” you teased. “For the content!”

And honestly? It was worth every awkward, giggly attempt.

Mel speaks~I know this is shit but I tried 😋😋 I loveeeee Chratt so much

[officer-sebastian]

*Sebastian huffed and squeezed his way through an unexpected number of scientists and other employees through Sector E’s halls. Giving quick “excuse me’s” and “pardon me’s” as he kept rubbing shoulders with lab coats. Sebastian figured that this stretch of the Science Team must be clocking out for a late lunch, he’s never seen any sector’s halls so packed before, unless you count the highest level of top-side customer service and protection from the general and oddball public.*

Christ al’mighty Ah’m jus’ tryn’a git ta mah shift, y’know, th’shift that keeps y’all from actin’ like dogs without horses.. Clearly it ain’t helpin’ much, Jesus.

*After a few more left turns, the checkpoint position he had been assigned comes into view, another guard tapping his fingers on the desk and perking up at the sight of Sebastian.*

“Christ, Seb, what took you so fuckin’ long, eh? Was ‘bout to just clock out and leave this place hanging.”

*Sebastian just chuckled* Yeah, yeah, mighty sorry ‘bout that. Fer some damn reason th’halls were packed full of them lab rats an’ Ah could hardly git past. Go take’a piss an’ then cool off on yer lunch, Pauly, Ah got it from ‘ere.

*The guard scoffed and crossed his arms* “Whatever. Thankfully those old cronies only now just took lunch, what ever reason you’re filed under checkpoint over here, you’ll be glad to know it’s practically empty now. Have fun staring at the wall.”

Yer too kind. Ah take it ya prob’ly scared ‘em off an’-

*There was the faintest rumble between under their feet. Several lights from down the hall suddenly flicker and blow out, the emergency lights immediately turn on, painting the metallic walls an eerie red. Sebastian goes quiet at that, steadily eyeing the darkened hallway and listening close for anything suspicious.*

*Officer Pauly swallows audibly, eyes still on Sebastian* “The hell was tha-“

*BUZWARN* Warning. Power Outages Detected In [SECTOR E]. All Affected Personnel Please Be Advised.

*BUZWARN* Warning. Unauthorized Biological Forms Detected In [SECTOR E]. All Non-Disaster Response Personnel Evacuate Immediately.

*GARBLED BUZWARN* Warning. W-Warning. Security i̴̜̒̚͠n̵̢̫̞͍̍̆ ̵̢̦͈̜̏̂̑̉[̶̨̰̹̟́͛̑̓S̶̢̰̤͛̀ͅĖ̵̟̲̌Ć̴̥͍̣̞́̐T̴̯̿O̴̻̮͚̅Ṛ̵̠̟͍͒͆́̄ ̵͔̓Ḙ̷́̏͘]̷̧̪͗̎͗͋ ̵̠̝͌͜͝R̵̖̼̰̬̅̍e̴̱̔͒̌p̷̡̙̥̜̊͆õ̸̻r̴̗̤̀̽̏̇t̶̨̧̺̫͠ ̵̞̻̲͑̑́̐T̷̯̰̘̦̍̒̌ơ̴̼͔̿ ̵̘̣́[̶̖̰̓̇̓Ḁ̸͓̞̿̂̔̌D̷̞̫̣̻͗͗V̴͓̿A̸̢̻̤̘͂N̶̳̙̫̊͂C̷̜͎̆E̴̙̘͛̉̈̕D̷͙͕̜̹́͝ ̴̠͖̗͛͝ͅB̷̲̞͊̊͗Ḯ̸̘Ợ̵̩̒̏̇L̸͉̖̒̄̆̉O̵͇̅̀͘͝G̶͓͇̊̓̽Ḭ̴̦̥͕̌̌̊Ç̷̓A̴̮͉̩̋̀̀ͅL̶͎̈̆̇̚ ̸̗͕͌R̴̨̰̋̾͝È̷̺͕̏̓ͅS̴͕͆̚E̴͚̩̫̍̀̆͜͝A̷̼͋̃̍R̸̤̳͑̚C̴̩͕̼̬͠H̶̥̤̓ ̴͖̦̱̈̓͂̈͜C̶͙̿̒O̶̼̖̳̼͆M̷̠̖̬̦̽̾P̵̠͕̰̈͂̇L̸̝̀E̴̺̮̱̊̈̑͠X̵̛̗̹̂]̷͍́̃͑́ ̷̬͈̬͖̋͆Ị̸̛̩̲̦͒̅m̷̦̠͋̇̃͠m̵̖͕̙͉̿̚ë̸̬́̋͌d̴͈̹̝̀i̵̤̔̈́à̴̟͇̍̓͌t̸̲͍̦͒̽̄e̵̠̽̈́̇̈́l̶̰̍͜y̷̡̧̘̒̏̈́̈

*The two security guards listened in shocked silence as the automated comms buzzed in and out, the emergency lights flicking at the same time. Sebastian persed his lips in a straight line, taking a deep breath and suddenly pushing Pauly into the checkpoint box*

“THE HELL ARE YOU-?!” *The guard began to shout in protest, before Sebastian tossed him inside and shut the door. Pauly gets up immediately, pounding on the glass* “OI ASSHOLE! The fuck do you think you’re doing?!”

*Sebastian snapped his fingers and put one up to his lips* Quiet. Ah’m goin’ ta check it out. It ain’t lookin’ good on our department if they go an’ lose two men on th’job. Ya sit tight an’ wait it out fer me, ‘kay?

*The guard sputtered a few times at that response, gesturing his hands wildly before sighing and giving up any retort, having known Sebastian long enough to know arguing with him like this is fruitless* “If you go and get yourself killed I won’t be there for whatever shoddy funeral they give you. It’ll be all your fault down to the grave, Seb.”

Thank ya, kindly, Pauly. How ‘bout we go an’ git’a beer with th’boys if Ah make back it in at least 3/4s? Ah’ll make a’bet with ya. *Sebastian clicks off the safety of his pistol and checks the magazine while he talks*

“Wh- Pfft, fucksake, Sebastian. Fine, whatever, I’ll bet. Quit wasting time.”

*Sebastian nods and runs down the hallway, making a salute with his pistol before turning around completely*

[f10werfae]

With lumberjack Henry what would happen if he did catch her playing with herself since it was mentioned in the one where she gets waxed that she's not allowed to?

Lumberjack!Henry catches his shy!short!Wife fooling around without him

A/N: Just a fun drabble for you guys:)

Disclaimer: 18+ / Lumberjack!Henry Masterlist

“Bunbun, what are you doing?” Henry rasped walking into the living room of their spacious cabin, his shy wife caught like a deer in headlights, her hips still slowly rolling against the plush couch pillow she was using to relieve herself. Her lower half was totally bare, her upper body covered by a thick velvet winter sleep jumper; one that she had begged Henry to buy for her once she saw the design of it and of course her grumpy lumberjack Henry caved in.

“S-so tingly, I-I’m sorry, help, please?” She rasped out, one of her hands reaching out for him, her newly painted nails glimmering in the fierce light coming from the fire. “Don’t know sugar, thought we had an agreement, whose pussy is this?” He questioned mockingly walking over, his middle finger coming down to softly rub on her little nub, a wet spot clearly visible onto the blue pillow. “S’yours, b-but you were busy, So I took care of it! Y-you said I needed to be more i-independent” She whimpered holding onto his wrist, her clit slowly grinding against his singular finger, chills running down her body.

“When I said be more independent, I mean when choosing what fuckin’ movie to watch, or choosing what you want to eat. Ya know I love lookin’ after you baby, you wouldn’t take that away from me wouldja?”

His mouth pulled into a frown, his brows furrowing, his eyes watching intently as his babygirl gasped thinking she had hurt her husband’s feelings; God forbid she ever did, she’d spend days crying and apologising on his lap. “No, Never! Y-you can help me now Hen” She stuttered out getting rid of the pillow, tugging on his arm gently as a giddy smile formed on her lips watching him adjust her body to the way he wanted to take it.

“W-wait I wanna see you” She whined realising her ass was facing towards him, her face looking at the arm of the chair, his hands splayed onto the small of her back; his hardened cock brushing against her from behind. “Bad girls don’t get to choose baby, now when I take your pretty ass from behind, wan’ you to bite that pillow you apparently love so much”

“B-but my thingy has been on that!” Y/n gasped still seeing the wet spot on the soft pillow in front of her, “Shoulda thought about that before you used it then bunbun, isn’t that right?” He growled right behind her ear, his belt buckle hitting her thighs as he roughly pulled down his work trousers and heavy duty belt.

“Mmm sorry h-hen, p-please let me see you” She whimpered wiggling her ass onto his boxer covered cock, hoping it was helping to persuade him; of course it didn’t the only time it mattered. Instead of replying back to her, he rewarded her with one hell of a spanking, and a glittery purple plug up her backdoor.

He would make sure she’d spend her time lookin for him, rather than wasting it on some stupid fucking pillow

-

taglist tags (not accepting new @, library blog for new users @f10werfaes-cosy-collection ):

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[fullofgutsndopamine]

What’re You After (Some Kind Of Disaster)

or: you and hasan are rivals for trivia night. Until one day, you come up with a plan.

tw/cursing, drinking

one of four miniseries

more hasan here

Thursday’s became your favorite day, easily.

cheap beer at your local pub, walking distance, and a chance to nerd out with your fellow classmates over a basket of too greasy fries.

everything would be perfect.

if it wasn’t for the other team.

the other team is everything you hate.

to begin with, when it’s a subject one of them know, they all have an elaborate hand shake they do, some kind of loud cheer and high fives passed around the table, clapping each other on the shoulders-

and they always looked over at your table, smaller, but crowded, elbow to elbow with your friends, poured over the piece of paper with the questions on them-

they were polar opposites, acted like this was some kind of event they stumbled into, by accident and oops became the top team.

they were cocky, and your team was determined to knock them down a few pegs.

You come in early to steal their table.

it’s petty, at the very least, but part of a strategy you and your best friend Sarah, spent the week planning. Anything to throw them off their game, to confuse them.

you walk in straighter than usual, shoulders squared, ready to proudly take the table in the corner, right by the trivia hosts stand-

and the son of the bitch is already there.

you can’t remember his name. you try to not remember your enemies name, but if you thought really hard about it, you could swear it was something with a ‘H’. Henry, maybe? No, that’s not right. it was a name you hadn’t heard before-

you get into the threshold of the door and his eyes meet yours with a smirk, sets his pen down and takes his glasses off, eyes narrow as he picks up his drink and takes a sip.

bastard.

you duck your head and walk to the normal table, about to text Sarah to abort the plan, when you slide into the seat, ready for it to be over-

“were you trying to take our table?”

you jump when you hear his voice, fumble with your phone, don’t want him to get the satisfaction of seeing your face red-

“Why would we want your stupid fuckin’ table?” you call back, not looking at him as you open a text to Sarah: “it’s not the table that’s making you win.”

he laughs, appears at your table, “That’s right. it’s skill.”

“skill is putting it generously. cheating, is the running theory-“

“You all think we’re smart enough to cheat? flattered, truly. This seat taken?” he asks, pulling out the wooden stool but not sitting.

“is-is this your fucked up way to try and psych the opposing team out?” a smirk falls on your lips and you hope it covers for the red on your face, “are you all threatened by us?”

you try to ignore the hurt evident on his face.

“Oh, just like trying to steal our table, yeah?” he pushes the stool in. “Good luck tonight, you all will need it.”

and he stalks back to his table.

okay, so you sort of feel like a dick, yes.

he seems the most reserved out of the table, like he accidentally stumbled into this group of people. sure, he shares the high fives and whatnot, but when they huddle together, the rare times they do, he always seems on the border, on the outside looking in.

you turn in your seat, ready to offer the seat up again but his glasses are back on the crook of his nose and he’s poured over a book-

luckily, the rest of your team meets up before the guilt can really eat at you, something for later tonight, when your seconds from sleep, to keep you up, is when you’ll remember this-

Annie slides in across from you.

“So,” she begins talking right away, picking up your glass of water and drinking immediately without asking. Annie talks a million miles an hour, loudly, and everyone else is simply along for the ride, “I did some research on pen names, but like, fuck, what an absolute rabbit hole that was. Did you order food yet?”

she continues talking, mostly about ordering food for the table, and your half listening as his table fills in behind you. (Was it an H on second thought? is it? wade?)

“those bastards are going down.” is the first thing Sarah says when she comes in, her book back is overflowing as usual, and she has three different pens and two pencils in the bin of her hair- “i brought my lucky charm.”

Annie groans comically, “Sarah, they already don’t take us seriously. they’re going to take us less seriously if you take your stupid fucking glass elephant out-“

“hey!” Sarah narrows her eyes, “we don’t talk bad about him. no disrespect. Here, now he’s pointing at you. Look of shame. take that in, babe.” as she turns it towards her.

“this is why they don’t take us seriously,” you groan, rubbing your forehead, “Henry or wade or whatever the fuck- saw me try and steal their table.”

“Henry?” Sarah says at the exact time as Annie says: “William?” with disgust.

their heads whip around to the other table, catch him looking at you and they duck further in their seats before turning to you: “His name is Hasan-“

“are you fraternizing with the enemy, you son of a bitch?” Annie says immediately, and her voice is loud enough you throw a used napkin at her in hopes it doesn’t draw more attention to her.

“i’m not fraternizing with anyone. keep your voice down, jesus christ.” you groan, “he just saw i tried to take the table and talked to me, briefly.”

“Spill.” Sarah says immediately, “Did he say anything that we could use against him? Did he admit to cheating?”

“The complete opposite,” you sigh, tearing at your napkin, feeling like a dick again. “He asked to sit down and i all but shooed him away. He looked like a beaten dog.”

Annie and Sarah look at each other from the corner of their eyes, a shared look with a smirk.

“what?” you groan, “i hate that look. what?”

annie and sarah both lean in at the same time, almost hitting heads with you, “listen. we have an idea, okay-“

Sarah interrupts, “and listen to the whole thing before you shoot it down.”

“Ask him out.”

You snort. it’s loud, and ugly, and if your mother was here, she’d grip her necklace and glare at you about how ladies act in public-

“Yeah!” Annie says, “Listen. Okay. you ask him out. distract the other team so he’s so lovesick or busy or whatever that he misses or the team falls apart.”

you shake your head, “y’all are out of your god damn minds-“

“Hasan!” Annie breaks from the huddle, waves him over, “cmere.”

“Annie, no. you son of a bitch-“

Hasan was drawing in his notebook, wasn’t paying much attention to his small group, narrows his eyes, but obeys, stalks over.

“If you all want a truce, i already tried to make one with this one here earlier,” he teases, jams his thumb at you. “and the answer was a loud no.”

“That’s only cause they wanted to ask you out for a drink after,” annie takes the lead, “to celebrate”

“celebrate?” Hasan smirks.

“either way it goes, a drink on us.” Annie insists.

his eyes narrow, not sold yet.

“How about this, if you win, you two get a drink together. our treat. if we win, we’ll leave you and your team alone.”

he snorts, “didn’t you win a certificate last week for longest running streak of not winning?”

“dick.” you say gently under your breath, but he doesn’t hear it.

he shakes his head, “yknow what? deal. I could always use a drink.”

and he sticks his hand in the middle of the table, annie going for the shake but he ignores it, shakes it off, ducks his head so he’s looking at you: “it’s a deal, yeah? c’mon.”

you hesitate long enough for annie and sarah to both kick your shins under the table and you sit up a little straighter, swallow all the pride you have: “it’s a deal.” as you tighten your hand around his.

he doesn’t see the smirks and shared glances the three of you share.

[bonefall]

what cats are still prayed to and revered by the clans besides firestar or skystar? i fuckin LOVE the patron spirits thing you have going on in this rewrite, it’s so cool to see what cats are worshipped and why

There's a lot of them! I don't think there could ever be a "comprehensive list" without just listing most of StarClan. See, most cats will typically value their own family over others, leading to the patrons "waxing and waning" in popularity over the generations.

But here's some of the ones who are pretty consistently popular!

Thunderstar = Justice Comeuppance, fair judgement, and mercy are also things he can be invoked for. Remember that a Patron gains its power from belief. Much like how Saint Michael was once a patron of healing as well as war, associations for BB!StarClan cats can shift over time.

Bumblemumble = Speech, Diplomacy She became less popular in the Chivalric Period, but was a favored patron for Pinestar to invoke. She never totally went away, even though her name has become "Bombolmlemlaan," 'Sentence-Tonguetwister,' over time. (Her name is also used in reference to "being tongue-tied." Fitting that she's a bit hard to translate into English!)

Acorn Swoop = Prra A Clan culture-specific value. Perfect timing, promptness, coincidences of good planning. Arriving in the nick of time. Acorn Swoop is a good example of how cats can wax and wane as well; when Hallowflight dies (he is alive to the current arc in BB), RiverClan will probably prefer invoking him over Acorn for a while.

Sparrow Heart = Loyalty and Fidelity. This BURNS her a new one, btw. Many of the other spirits as old as her have begun to lost touch with their mortal lives, but she didn't join Clear Sky because she loves him. She didn't serve him for his own ends. She wanted his power, and in death she's been reduced to his eternal stooge. She craves his throne. (And I have to leave it there until we find out what the next few arcs have in store :3)

Speckletail = Protection Against Natural Disaster Storms, deforestation, pollution, whatever. Speckletail is invoked to defend Clans against oncoming doom, because girlie took out a bulldozer and the battle culture is obsessed with that

Stonefur = Winning the War/Losing the Battle An important god for lost causes. When you aren't able to win, he is invoked to make your death mean something. Needletail, for the first time in a long time, requested for StarClan to call down his strength.

Blackstar = Redemption And change in a better direction. Said to be reflected in frogs in particular, how they go from tadpoles to full creatures, associated with wetland health thanks to his ambitious Bog Project.

Sundrown Patrol = Directions Most of them are not dead yet. Feathertail is currently the only one in the role and protects travelers generally, but eventually her and her Cohorts will comfortably divide up the cardinal directions. Feathertail is South (Towards the Mountain), Tawny is West (Towards the Ocean), Bramble is North (Towards the Lake) and Crowfeather is East (Into the Wilderness).

Leafpool = Clarity Leafpool Moonpool is one of the most popular young spirits. In difficult situations, she is invoked for StarClan to see your sins and understand that you are trying to find the holiest way through them. The Firekin family is going to be a very strong pantheon eventually.

Palefoot = Bodies that Can't Be Recovered/Closure Anon suggestion that is canon now. Palefoot was murdered by Batear for killing Fenneldust and shoved into a bog where his family would never find him, because Batear was not allowed to go to ThunderClan to sit vigil for his best friend. When someone is lost and can't be buried, Palefoot is often invoked for comfort. He is actually sort of displacing Turtle Heart, who used to function in a similar way. She is being pushed into a more specific role for Lost Parents, not bodies or closure in general.

In addition, Dark Forest Spirits are also powerful... and thanks to the fact you have to use a direct line to get to them, quite capable of granting strength without holding back. They have no StarClan to answer to if they blessed the plans of the wrong cat.

So they can do curses for you, if THAT is what you're seeking. A whole lot of these cats tend to provide various types of revenge lmao... "We serve Vengeance here, sir."

Batear and Fenneldust = Retribution Evolved from a mix of how Batear's target went BEYOND his victim to deny closure to the family, and also the Fepfr which he was named for, Long-Eared Bat, which in Clan culture is said to have a modest song of mourning for every bat wrongfully killed. Fenneldust actually LOVED that he was willing to be so spiteful for her, and followed him to the Dark Forest. So if you want, you can call for them to cause pain to people who wronged you. If your case is bad though, they'll fuck with you instead. They aren't MALICIOUS spirits though... just mischievous.

Mapleshade = Revenge If you want your target to DIE, you give her a call. She is ACTIVELY malicious. She will stop at nothing to kill someone she agrees should go, even going as far as to fight a Fetcher to drag the target down with her. If you're just miffed at someone and want them to get karma, you talk to Batsy and Fenfen. If you want BLOOD, you talk to Mapleshade. But be prepared, because she is just as dangerous as that implies.

Cloudberry and Ryewhisker = Secrecy An obvious one, but one of the gentler requests of the Dark Forest. They will help you hide forbidden love from your Clan, and can be prayed to when you're having a close call and may be discovered.

[infinitethree]

Given the nature of the information they're dealing with, the decision was made to drag Vio and Lucid into the mix as well.

Aster is relieved that Daz agreed to do so. He’s even more relieved that because Lucid is involved, they can't meet in the secluded bunker of the Council HQ.

It's a dual-purpose meeting. Firstly and most importantly, they need to share the information they learned about the Showrunner. 

Not just the new stuff– though those bombshells are, of course, the driving force of this. The older information that the Council is aware of will have to be shared, too.

Secondly, though…they need to figure out how to free Innit.

Regardless of Daz’s stance on the matter, leaving Innit trapped isn't an option.

For one, it's unimaginably inhumane. Innit clearly just wants to be able to do basic things. Its willing to be enchanted with loyalty to be able to do something as simple as look where it wants to and read books.

Daz and Innit being forced to stay together like that is a recipe for disaster, too. Innit can't get therapy when it doesn't have a voice, after all.

Plus its already proven willing to punish Daz. If it decided to go nuclear…what could they really do to stop it, bar putting Daz in a coma?

So, yeah. Innit deserves to be free, and Daz deserves to have his head to himself again.

…Even if that’s a bit hypocritical for Aster to want for him.

Their chosen gathering place is the Welcome Wagon. It's meant for discussions, there aren't currently any people in the rooms upstairs, and all four employees are a part of the meeting.

The first matter of business is to give Vio a brief rundown of Daz, the Council, and associated information.

Daz is the one who starts the main topic, and he does so by projecting a drawing of the Showrunner on the screen.

Raine’s style is immediately obvious, at least to Aster.

Deadly serious, Daz says, “This is the Showrunner. What we knew as the Scribe– that entity is someone else entirely. Their name was just…borrowed. Aster and I– we met the Showrunner.”

Aster adds, “Innit, too.” “Are you seriously still– this is fucking important!”

He snaps back, “Can you stop being petty for like five seconds? Its presence there was kind of a big deal! The Showrunner likes your admin half, asshole! We can't ignore that fact!”

Daz glares at him a moment, then turns to the others. “The bigger piece of info is that Time isn't real.”

Day, Vio, and Theo all look incredulous. “They’re very fuckin’ real, don't say shit like that,” Theo tells them. It’s a warning, because to Theo that kind of disrespect is liable to earn the wrath of a god.

Since Theo is not only a mythology buff but has met several gods…if anyone has reason to be twitchy about that sort of thing, it's him.

He is the that started the knock-on-wood trend of assuring Time that any potentially negative thing is said without any negativity, too.

“I'll humor this if you can explain who the fuck we've done– everything for. If you can't, I'm walking out right now,” Day warns. 

It’s clear he’s not kidding about that.

Aster takes a deep breath and says, “The Scribe, apparently. The Showrunner claimed that Time was just a ‘sockpuppet’ to be used as the Scribe needed.”

He grimaces. “Which, I mean…if the two of them are working together, and the Showrunner is the one behind the questions and Observers…”

Theo suddenly straightens up in a way that Aster realizes means he’s actually using his head. When he wants to, Theo can be smart…he just generally doesn’t bother to want that.

“Are you fuckin’ sure the one who was chatting with us was the Showrunner? Not the Observers, but the fuckin’-- the other shit. You two must know what I mean, yeah?”

Daz’s expression is grim. “There’s no doubt in my mind.”

A soft hiss escapes from Theo as he slumps backwards. He scrubs a hand down his face and looks to Day.

“They fuckin’-- first time we heard them, you remember what they said? We fuckin’ pointed out that Time would be pissed, n’--”

Realization visibly washes over Day as he finishes, “And they laughed. That we ‘weren’t supposed to know’, but it was still funny that we’d try to get Time involved.”

“Fuckin’ shit.”

That’s a sentiment that Aster can fully get behind. None of this is remotely fun to learn, and in fact radically alters what they assumed were core facets of their lives.

Lucid looks stricken. “What are we even supposed to do with this info, anyway?”

Rolling his eyes, Daz tells him, “You? Nothing. But given your position and how big of a deal this is, I can’t justify keeping you out of the loop.”

There’s a long beat, and then Daz adds, “And I wasn’t going to bring anyone else to the Council rooms. If it’s not a full secret from you, it’s pointless to shut you out.”

Aster sighs. “Yeahhhh. The Council HQ is kind of special to us.” “You’ve always hated how it looks,” Daz scoffs. Aster rolls his eyes and tells him, “Yeah, well, it’s grown on me. Kind of hard for it not to, with how much time I spend there.”

“This is so fucking weird,” Lucid mumbles.

Raine pats his shoulder and tells him, “You’ll get used to it. They fight constantly.”

“For fucked up reasons, apparently,” Khons reminds them.

“Do I want to–” “It’s literally none of your business,” Daz hisses at the admin.

Lucid shrinks down in his seat, hands raised defensively. “Okay, not asking then!”

Daz scrubs a hand through his hair as he swipes the screen to show the next image. “This is the Showrunner’s domain. I have no fucking idea how useful knowing this will be, but I’m not leaving something like that on the table.”

Aster studies the art piece for a moment. It’s very close to what he remembers– Daz’s memory and Raine’s skill are an excellent combo.

He says, “The seats seemed like they stretched forever. A few were occupied, but only two were clearly taken. The figures had different levels of definition and the Showrunner called them ‘representations of the audience’. I’m…guessing those are Observers.”

With a nod, Daz confirms, “If I had to make a theory…the more clear they are, the more frequently they show up.”

He reaches up and smacks a hand on one of the solid ones in what seemed like the VIP section.

“One of these two is probably the new one who’s been an asshole.”

Aster grimaces. “Speaking of Observers…” “There’s no need to bring up–”

Ignoring the bastard, Aster continues, “Innit needs to be given a body. Keeping it there goes beyond caution and into inhumane. It fucked up, yes, but– shit, didn’t all of us do that, too? Half of Sanctuary are war criminals in some capacity!”

Theo immediately argues, “It’d fuckin’ attack Lee, wouldn’t it?”

Aster shakes his head. “No. It– Theo, I spoke to it. I saw a– a timelapse of its entire life. Before the Observers came, the only people who knew about it were Dream and Daz. Both of them hurt it deeply.”

He gestures at Daz, continuing, “You’re asking a fully sentient and sapient person to be trapped with someone who tortured it for three years. Daz didn’t just ignore it, Theo– he shut it out entirely. He trapped it in a room and left it to rot.”

“It put me in a coma because I refused to kill a child,” Daz snaps. “A child it still hates!”

“I believe it wants freedom more than it wants revenge,” Aster argues.

Day’s arms fold across his chest. “How can we trust that? How can we trust it won’t try anything?”

Aster stares him in the eyes. “It said it would willingly be enchanted with loyalty, as long as I was the one it was bound to.”

The room is quiet.

“Day– you know how bad Daz’s enchantment was. The fact that it wants freedom so badly that it would be the one to suggest that…”

Daz tells them, “It couldn’t feel it. It’s never had any senses beyond sound and sight.”

Hands thrown wide for emphasis, Aster snaps, “And you think that isn’t fucking horrifying?! It wants to choose where to look, Daz! To be able to listen to the music it wants or eat or walk outside!”

Aster huffs at that.

“The reason I got on this topic is because Innit has at least three Observers it considers friends. I saw them as animals with a silvery-lavender swirly color–”

Vio sighs softly. “Same as the portals. No wonder you realized the connection.”

Sneering, Daz corrects, “No, this dipshit didn’t put the pieces together himself.”

Choosing to ignore that particular jab, Aster continues, “And, again; the Showrunner likes Innit. They sure as fuck don’t like Daz, but they– literally gave his admin half headpats. And squished its cheeks.”

He points out, “As cynical as it sounds? We have a person who the omnipotent ruler of time and reality is fond of. That same person is, as most of this room just heard–”

“I fuckin’ heard it too,” Theo tells him. “Fuckin’ Observers love it back. Enough to ask for it to be treated fuckin’ nice.”

Aster nods. “Either we have someone with all that weight behind them on our side, or we make an enemy out of all of them.”

“Innit wants to see Sanctuary burn,” Daz tries to tell them. “It fucking hates every single person here, and none more than Lee.”

Eyes narrowing, Aster argues, “Pretty sure it hates you the most, actually.” “Yeah, well– I’m used to dealing with it.” “It’s proven willing to make you suffer, and forgive me for not wanting to see what a full mental break looks like from you.”

Daz opens his mouth, but Aster cuts him off by turning back to the others. “One way or another, Innit will be freed. I haven’t just been seeing Daz’s past– I’ve been seeing the future, too. And Innit was sure as fuck walking around there!”

The bastard looks alarmed. “What? When the– why the fuck didn’t you say anything?!”

He folds his arms over his chest. “I didn’t exactly want to get into it.” “You know full goddamned well that’s not good enough. Answer the fucking question, Aster.”

Uhg, there’s no way he’ll let this go.

Reluctantly, he admits, “...At some point in the future, Daz and I get together. And, uh– I saw Innit at the wedding. It…handed Daz over to me, actually.”

Daz takes a deep breath, and guessing what he’ll say, Aster rolls his eyes and adds, “And Day handed me over to you, before you get pissy.”

“Excuse me?”

He shrugs helplessly at Day’s bafflement. “I desperately wish I were making it up. The idea of getting together with Daz, of all fucking people–” “Says the one who apparently gets fucked by me.” “Really? Really?”

Like a lightswitch, Daz flips his personality to a much warmer one. Unfortunately, Aster can tell the difference– there’s too much of an edge of malice in the way he smiles as he drapes his arms over his shoulders.

Cooing, Daz asks, “What’s the matter, baby? Worried you’ll think too hard about it here?”

He feels his face heat up despite himself. “First of all– I haven’t actually seen anything, just enough to know that– that happens. Second of all, get your hands off of me before I break your arms.”

Pouting at him, the fucking sociopath he apparently marries says, “But, Star…despite claiming you hate it, you’re getting all flustered.”

Aster gets a split-second flash of a warm giggle from Future-Daz of, “My sweet, snuggly Star!”

He grimaces. “I’m pretty sure I suffer a psychotic break to actually be interested in you.”

And he sees himself yet again, this time sitting in the Swords and Shields training hall. He’s next to Future-Theo, who seems like he’s really looking at Future-Aster for the first time in a long time. “...If it’s not too weird n’ personal, uh…how did you know? That you, y’know– fuckin’ liked him.”

Future-Aster seems to need a while to gather his thoughts. “Once I got closer to him, I started seeing all the things that were…really good. His quirks stopped being annoying and started being charming. I would get excited to come home, not because we did anything all that interesting but just because…I liked spending time with him.”

There’s a soft, fond smile as Future-Aster absently runs a thumb over what looks disturbingly like a bite mark on his shoulder. “I don’t really even remember what it’s like not to love him. He’s…he’s everything to me. The world feels brighter and happier now that I wake up next to him every morning.”

Future-Theo opens his mouth, but is interrupted by Future-Daz coming into the room.

The moment he clocks Aster’s lack of a shirt– which is how he usually works out, it’s annoying to have them get soaked with sweat– Future-Daz turns bright pink and demands, “Star, why are you– where is your shirt?!

Instead of a normal, reasonable answer, Future-Aster just grins and leans back. “I forgot you bit me, sorry.” “You don’t look sorry at all.” “And you don’t like you hate seeing me like this, soooo–”

Future-Daz huffs, hands going to his hips. “You’re– you’re the worst.” “Mm-hmm.” “Awful. Just, just terrible.” “Indeed.” “A jerk who likes making fun of me and making me embarrassed.”

Future-Aster reaches out and tugs his significant other into his lap. “And yet you still like me.”

Despite another, somewhat sullen huff, Future-Daz doesn’t argue that point.

When Aster is back in the present, Daz is staring intently at him. That faux-flirting is gone, though he’s still got his arms over his shoulders. “What did you see?”

Though he could answer this in a dozen ways, he chooses the pettiest he can think of. “You being easily embarrassed and down bad for me.”

Ignoring the way Daz splutters, he shoves his arms off and turns to face the others again. “Anyway. It doesn’t actually matter if you agree or not. Either you cooperate, or I use the wish I’ve earned via seeing Daz’s bullshit and grant it a body myself.”

Lee finally speaks up. “Ignoring all of– that? I think we should do it. It’s fucked up to keep it locked up like that. If I’m the one supposedly in danger, I should be the one to decide if it’s worth it or not. I think it is. Innit doesn’t have to like me– the server is plenty big for both of us.”

Breathing a sigh of relief, Aster smiles fondly at his charge.

Then Lee continues, “And I don’t think it’s fair to make it be enchanted, too. It sets a really nasty precedent and would erode trust in not just Lucid, but everyone who had a part in that. Myself included.”

It’s an extremely good point. Aster nods, brow furrowed. “It– the idea of doing that makes me really uncomfortable.”

He gestures at Theo, who seems unsure. “You’ve got oceans of blood on your hands. I don’t think Innit was right, but I think it felt it was justified.”

“Lee was fuckin’ six,” Theo tells him. “It felt a baby admin, one who could control them because he’s a Dream. Unlike with Day and Lucid, who Daz did not trust–”

“Wait, you didn’t trust us? Then why did you let us undo the loyalty? Especially if you knew about code already,” Lucid interrupts.

Daz, visibly annoyed, snaps, “We could track your coding. If you had done anything we didn’t like, I’d have ruined you.”

Despite the admin’s doubt, Lee nods. “He can do that. He’ll correct my work when I’m not even showing him my console and when I didn’t even think he was paying attention. It’s freaky.”

That little side path resolved, Aster continues, “Daz was way less willing to hurt Lee. Innit, freshly betrayed, deeply traumatized, and desperate to die, went on high alert because it saw Lee as a threat.”

Theo repeats, “He was six!”

Aster responds, “And when Daz was six, he decided to rip out the parts of him that were ‘bad and wrong’ because his brother is a fucking monster. Again, I’m not saying Innit was right! It was a fucked up thing to do! But it was also a trauma response. For trauma that has only festered in the meantime, because unlike Daz, Innit has been alone.”

As much as he hates to do this, he appeals to the one who will hold ultimate authority in this matter.

“You know damn fucking well what isolation does to a person. You’re debating condemning someone to a fate very literally worse than death because you don’t like that they fucked up. Let me remind you that you fucked up pretty damn bad, too. And, again– if all of you refuse, I’ll use the wish on this. Having the memories of its life in my head is bad enough, but knowing I’ve abandoned someone in those conditions…I’d never be able to live with myself.”

He can tell Daz is seething, but for once he doesn’t care.

The bastard is wrong about this. Whatever punishment Innit may have deserved– what its gotten has far outstripped that.

Vio says, “Aster has a point. I know this is a touchy matter, but leaving Innit in there…that’s not acceptable. Not only would we incur the wrath of the Observers and likely the Showrunner, but we have no guarantee that it wouldn’t find another way to escape. We can extend a hand, or risk Innit being free with no reason not to raze the server to the ground.”

Day scrubs a hand down his face, which has a sour expression. “...If we’re doing this, its getting put into therapy with Iatros, too. And I want it nowhere near Summer Hills.”

There’s a sudden, bitter laugh from Daz. “Oh, wow. That’s actually– actually an interesting idea.”

The bastard grips his shoulder with more force than Aster was aware he was capable of.

“It proposes that it could live with Aster. If its so fucking attached to him, and Aster is so goddamned determined to go forward with this stupid fucking plan– surely he can open his shitty little house to that thing, huh?”

He considers where would even work. “I– there’s literally nowhere for it to go. I’m willing to have an extension or something, I guess?”

Daz’s fingers dig into his shoulder. Voice a low, dangerous hiss, he warns, “If you can’t keep it in line, I’ll personally make your life a living hell.”

A shudder goes down his spine. Daz’s wrath is not a small thing, as proven by him killing his ex-mentor in cold blood and destroying him the worst way he could.

“And you should try group counseling with it. Maybe you’ll be less of a fucking sociopath when you learn to at least tolerate a fundamental part of you.”

Flippantly, and forcibly removing Daz’s hand from his shoulder, he adds, “If you want to do the whole song and dance about me getting on your good side? Maybe be less of an insufferable bastard, first. Your trauma is valid but your responses to it sure as fuck aren’t.”

Getting into his space, he growls, “I should be at your throat for the fact that you’ve spent three fucking years conditioning me to hate you. I should be furious you’ve actively abused my trauma to make sure you never had to deal with yours! You’ve refused to actually let yourself heal because you’re a coward, Daz.”

Daz’s eyes thin into slits as he snaps back, “I don’t need your preaching, considering you–” “I’ve fucking told you, I had no idea it would be like this! I also, shockingly, didn’t realize exactly how broken you actually are! I was sure you’d hate me for not taking the offer. It’s a wish that can bend the laws of reality, and I thought you would be mature enough to recognize that even though it sucks to have someone know more than you wanted…that you’d agree it’s worth it.”

He takes a step back and scoffs, “Fuck, at times like these, I can see why the Showrunner hates you. You’re a selfish asshole who only seems to do good things when it’s convenient for you.”

As he turns on his heel and stalks out, he finishes off with, “Lately, I wonder if I was right to take your hand at all.”

Aster knows he’ll regret those words later, in one form or another.

But he’s also sick and tired of Daz kicking him in the dick because he’s pissed that he’s lost control.

At no point did Aster ask for any of this! He hates having to be the one to drag Daz kicking and screaming into a better place! He hates seeing his past and the trauma that have shaped him into the paranoid bastard that he is today!

A lot of the time, he kind of hates seeing the future, too. It only makes their current relationship feel worse, because Aster can see that Daz is capable of being good to him.

Even something as simple as the two of them watching a movie together feels so fucking bittersweet, because it’s clear they do eventually come to love each other.

Yet, right now, Daz hates him. Whatever his actual feelings before, right now they’re at the lowest they’ve ever been.

…There aren’t many times that Aster has seriously considered the benefits of getting drunk. The idea of losing control of himself gives him hives.

But, honestly, the chance of shutting off his own heavily leashed anger and resentment for the night sounds amazing.

This’ll be fun to discuss with his therapist. The poor Puffy has no goddamned idea the shit he’s kept bottled up until now, but it’s beyond time that he start doing so.

[obitv]

villain william revenant au? did i hear anyone ask for a villiam/ashe au? no? well. you're getting it anyway

the first time you meet william wisp, you think there's a dead body on your couch.

a leap in logic for the average person, maybe, but when your dad... does a lot of work you don't want to think about, and then there's a pale, bloody, not moving boy getting blood on your favourite couch, you think you might be allowed make those leaps.

the screaming probably isn't as excusable though. not that you screamed THAT MUCH, ok, but. you did a little. and dropped your bowl of pasta that you ahd been planning to sit on that couch and eat. and that's how, surprise! you found out the corpse was actually a totally normal beat up kid who forgot to blink at you for a solid minute.

in his defence, you were also staring at him. you hadn't even realised mark had come home yet, and bringing random kids back with him was- definitely a new one. you keep getting stuck on the same though -- he's on my couch. your pasta is all over the floor and there's a stranger in your home but the most important part of this to you is that fucking couch and you can't get your mouth working enough to form words.

when you're standing there, eyes locked with this kid and pasta on the floor, that's when your dad finally comes in. obviously you screaming had startled him, because he looks a mix of frantic and pissed off like you've never seen from him. but when he slams the door open and you both snap your heads over to look at him, he just sighs and drags a hand down his face.

"fuck's sake... ashe, go back to your room. now."

it takes a few seconds for what he said to register with you. however, you've only been awake for 15 minutes and all 15 of those were spent trying to stay awake long enough to make the pasta you dropped, so even after the words sink in you're still just opening and closing your mouth without any sound by the time the boy speaks up.

"is this your fucking house?"

mark turns from lightly glaring at you to sending daggers at the boy. "you keep your fuckin' mouth shut, kid. ashe, go, now."

"no, hey! you can't just randonly bring me to some fucking house and not tell me? when you said you 'knew a place' i could stay until mal got back i figured you meant, like, a lair! a wave-cave! not a- are we in the fucking suburbs?"

"no, no, we ain't fuckin' doin' this right now! ashe, go to your room."

you watch this verbal tennis with a growing interest. you really, really want to ask what's going on, but- you haven't seen mark this pissed off in... a long time. and besides, if this kid is telling the truth, your dad offered to let him stay here, so. you'll get your chance to ask questions later.

you still need to go get breakfast, anyway.

-

a few hours later, when you're in the middle of throughly blasting your brain out with every speaker you own, your bedroom door creaks open. now that you're awake, and the blood's been cleaned off his face, you get a much better look at him.

and, because your life is a disaster, you realise that he's kinda cute. still dead-looking, even when hes walking, but there's... an appeal there.

you also think you might be finally losing your mind.

he goes to talk, then winces as he seems to register the music you still have on blast, whoch is when you also register the music and scramble to turn it down. and try not to blush. try really, really hard not to blush.

"hey, uh... hey. sorry for... scaring you earlier. and being in your house... wa- your dad didn't tell me anyone else lived here. or where here is. i- i'm william? william, that's me! you don't have to tell me your name or anything, but i. wanted to apologise. because i'll be staying here for a couple days, until my mentor is back. uh. yeah. sorry. again."

you do not know how you are supposed to respond to this. briefly, you wonder if you've watched any anime with this premise.

"uh. cool." and you give a thumbs up. you sit there, you stare this kid, william, who has probably been yelled at by your dad for the last few hours which you KNOW is terrifying, and, again, is cute, and you give him a thumbs up. and an attempt at a smile that feels a lot more like a grimace because you don't know how to be smooth to save your life. "i'm ashe, by the way. i'm not used to- having people over. or talking in general."

he nods, and smiles at you. just a small quirk of the lips really, but you count it as a win that you haven't immediately scared him off. "yeah. sick. i'll... go. now. nice to meet you, ashe."

it is unreasonably difficult to slow your heartbeat down again after he closes the door. you, ashe winters, are so fucked.

[imnotoverlyobsessive]

10 characters in 10 fandoms

Tagged by @alexagirlie (love you 😘)

In no particular order—

1. Timothée Chalamet. “But Maggie, that’s not a character, that’s just a dude!” Yes I know, shut the fuck up I love him

2. Katara. She’s a bamf.

3. Lee from Bones & All. Honestly if he ate me I wouldn’t even be mad about it, at least I’d get to look at him as I died and also his lips would touch my skin which is miracle regardless of the context

4. Eddie Munson from Stranger Things. He’s yummy, okay, don’t @ me

5. Laurie Laurence from Little Women, bc he’s a total drama queen and I love him for it, also AmyLaurie is what got me into RPF to begin with and none of my fics would exist without it, soooooo

6. Paul Atreides, my delicious disaster boy. How I love him.

7. Hal from The King, yes I know he’s based off a real person, but he’s a murderous drunken king and I’d like to have his heirs thanks, next king is Jewish cause I fuckin said so

8. Daenerys Targaryen, bc she’s the queen we should’ve had.

9. Stiles, my beloved

10. Simon Waite from Harrow Faire by Kathryn Ann Kingsley, here is a fanart I asked someone to do for me, you can view her linktree here

Tagging, uhhhhhh @softhecreator @cocoamoonmalfoy @boomhauer and if anyone else wants to you can consider this your tag and just say I did it lol

[pugs-cats-bb-8]

Persona 5-The Daybreakers

This has never been dubbed into English, it is subbed through. Just letting people know.

I love Morgana 🤣🤣

They have to go down to the train station to access Mementos? I thought they entered from above. So they just disappear into thin air?

So this takes place sometime after Yusuke.

Why does Ren look pissed and disinterested?

I love the shot of them getting in.

Ren drives like I do. 🤣🤣

I can drive the cat. No, I can't.

They make Akechi even prettier 🥰🥰Also his eyes look more red here.

This dude looks like Wonder.

I know that beer brand 🤣🤣

Pink chalk?

Yusuke's friend looks like a wet puppy.

Does the game ever ask "Why don't they go to the police"? Like I know it's established pretty early on that the police aren't going to do anything (the game's words, not mine) and that's basically why the Phantom Thieves exist.

Ren is pretty 😍😍 And basically stalking that dude. Way to take tips from your boyfriend🤣🤣

I've never seen Ren wear a cross-body bag. Minus that uh, fashion disaster (IMHO) of a collab with a tourism thingy.

Damn, he really pissed... and hot.

Ren looked normal for a frame. Is this an AU? Like Ren's harder than usual.

Why does he react like he forgot Morgana was there? 🤣🤣

My man is risking his ass using Leblanc. Like I remember reading about this on the Wikia but really. I like how they weren't concerned about using Leblanc. Like really, especially cause Ren could get kicked out, property could be damaged, Morgana could get hurt, Sojiro could get hurt if he walks in. Not to mention it's just plain rude to be that careless. Ren has balls.

Where'd the panic light come from? They don't have Futaba yet. Iwai!?

If it wasn't Makigami? then who was it?

It was his brother, Yusuke's wet puppy friend. 😲😲

He's the leader? I thought he was the lackey😲😲 I thought the older dude was the leader.

That transformation was uh...

Where'd the bloody Oni come from? I thought we were fighting Mitras.

Add in the onion bird.

Ren is badass 😍😍🥵🥵

If Arsene's gonna get more lines. I would love it if it got dubbed. That's part of the reason I kept him. 😋😋😋😋

I like how they do baton pass all athletic and dramatic.

Long legs 😍😍

What I wouldn't give to be his position. 😍😍

"The arrogance in your heart. I stole it". (I accidentally flipped it although I think it works better the other way). It reminds me of a line from dancing. "Did you enjoy the show? Well, until next time". 🥵😍

Although, it sounds like intil to me. Same thing happened with Ippon Datara. I thought it was Ippon Tatara. In my defense, I had to learn what his voice sounded like.

Wait, this dude is a Mementos Mission. He's a combo of 2MM. 6/18 you get The Phantom Thieves vs. Burglary Ring. The story matches up halfway and the dude's name is Makigami but it never mentions him having a brother. It's even the same shadow. Fake-Man Show in 3rd sem has a brother that he abused and he says the same thing as his shadow disappears.

Morgana's dopey face. Maybe because I have it paused? 🤣🤣

Pretty girl in the crowd.

Just hear a random cat and find a key and a note 🤣🤣. That's how we got some of our cats. Minus the key and note.

He's kinda cute. Why does he look like a mix of Akechi and Natsume? But add in wet puppy.

😍😍😍🥵 Fuckin' gorgeous shot. Reminds me of when Morgana's floating away at the end/near the end of 5.

They went straight into Kaneshiro, without Makoto? I wish the game did that. 🤣🤣 Maybe it was near Kanoshiro to begin with.

So, that was a test run? I don't know how to word it. It makes sense, given that Ren's not that confident when he starts. It does provide insight on what thiefy lengths Ren is capable of.

A-1 (Steak Sauce🤭) animated this? It looks amazing. What happened between episode 0 and 1? Come to think of it they did the opening for Radiant Historia too. Which also looks great and it's on the 3DS. I think they also did a couple of P3 movies too. So, why does the anime look like it does?

[cyrusthedragon]

If you're miraxus and bicksanna fan, STOP FUCKING SCROLLING, i need to share smth!

Foreword:

I've been thinking about it for a while now so hell I know I'm freaking delulu ok but here is the thing: I like thinking about miraxus children who can do horrible things just because they have a holy amount of magic and can't control it properly yet. They're just children (I like thinking about miraxus having three kids, first girl, second son, and third girl) and it's kinda normal for them, but the third one...

The youngest daughter, fuckin' smoothie of her parents, multiplied by each other, is a DISASTER with a big no-no for magic. No magic 'till your eighteen birthday, young lady.

And there are little elements:

Since the middle and oldest are powerful (sister with thunder dragon slayer magic from her father, and brother with satan soul from his mother), the third one has everything IN ONE. UPGRADED. The mix of satan/transformation magic (pretty powerful on its own) and lightning magic gave her almost unlimited stamina and all abilities to change her magic by, for example, transforming it into speed, and being herself like lightning.

But that's not what I wanna say.

What I do want to say is that what if one day, examining her own powers, little brat will go too far and fuckING BREAK THE SPACE AND TIME CONTINUUM, so there we have a situation my brain is thinking about a whole month for now:

Mirajane and Laxus are on their fully deserved vacation, taking a break from their children, leaving them in the care of Uncle Bickslow and Aunty Lisanna.

With older siblings everything is fine, they almost are grown-ups, so they can take care of themselves and just chill or even take a few missions to deal with, it's normal for them, they're pretty skillful.

So the only thing Lisanna and Bickslow need to be worried about THE THIRD LITTLE PIECE OF SH- the third ten years old babygirl, with the angelic face of her mother, and the fucked up attitude of her father, brat it is.

Older ones do usually go on missions together, so the youngest is just with her uncle and aunt, but, if Lisanna is Responsible and Careful, Bickslow... poor man is doing his best, especially with the fem version of Laxus, who just doesn't really care about pretending to be a nice girl since mommy and daddy are no longer around and can't scold her (mommy) or make fun of her (daddy) for being rude.

And thinks now she can do whatever she wants.

Matter of fact, she is doing whatever she wants.

And she really, badly wants to know how fast she can run from her auntie and uncle, using her lightning magic to speed her up.

Turns out, she can be really fast.

They can't even come close to her speed.

Not to mention chasing and catching her.

So fast that suddenly the guild changes in front of her eyes, the familiar faces of guild mates, uncles, and aunties become younger, and someone even turns into a child.

Master Makarov didn't change tho.

And now Auntie Aska is a child, as well as Uncle Romeo is, Uncle Natsu and Auntie Lucy younger and without their wedding rings, Auntie Erza too, and her momma is...HERE?!

She did not quite understand what had happened, but seeing the shocked faces of the people in the guild, silently staring at her as if she were an alien when she was pretty sure she was human...Told her that she accidentally did something she didn't mean to.

Something for what not just daddy, but mommy too will definitely officially ban magic on her.

'The fuck just happened?..' she heard that familiar voice and faced her own father, looking much, much younger than she ever saw him, and then her mother's voice answered quietly in that still shocked silence: 'I... don't think, I know... Who are you, baby?'

So.

Now her auntie Lisanna and uncle Bickslow need to bring her home from another timeline, cus she accidentally broke the laws of physics and Moved Into the Past Thirty Years Ago.

Without dragging her older siblings into that.

Otherwise, their parents would be really...really mad.

You don't want to see Mirajane Strauss and Laxus Dreyar mad.

You don't want to see Mirajane Strauss and Laxus Dreyar mad cuz you didn't keep an eye on their children.

Ouuff...

That's all.

Thanks for your attention. I JUST NEEDED TO SAY IT. NOW I'M FREE. FINALLY. *ugly crying*

Check the tegs

[resurrection-of-soul]

Flashback | PSYCHOBREAK 12

Writer: Akira (日日日)

Characters: Koga, Adonis, Kaoru, Rei

Rei: Kya~✰ Undead~♪ Do youw bwest~ Don’t wose~♪ Koga: I was hopin’ he’d show up, but… What the hell is that idiot senpai doing?!

[ For the best viewing experience, please read directly on my blog! ♪ ]

Time: The next day, the day of the "Flashback" live.

Location: The underground live house near Yumenosaki Academy

Koga: “♪~♪~♪”

Koga: (Damn it! I was tricked…!) (The hell’s up with you, Sakuma-senpai? Weren’tcha actin’ all cool yesterday, sayin’ stuff like, “I’m gonna give it my all tomorrow”!?) (So where the hell are you!?) (The start time we were advertisin’ in all the promotional materials n’ such has already come n’ gone!) (So even though it’s just us, we still had to start the performance!)

Adonis: ……

Kaoru: ……

Koga: (Ughhh? It can’t be helped in Adonis’s case, he’s real meek despite his imposin’ looks!) (This is his first live performance, so he probably got overwhelmed n’ blanked out!) (But Hakaze-senpai- or rather, Playboy! You’re our senpai at Yumenosaki, ain’tcha? So why’re ya tremblin’ from nerves like a total newbie?!) (What was with that “I’m the kind of man you can rely on” crap?! Ya damn liar!) (Everythin’ 'bout this performance seriously sucks! UNDEAD’s the worst band ever!) (Guess I already knew this is how it’d go, though!? Whether it’s practice or whatever else, we fell short on aaall a’ that stuff! There’s nooo way some impromptu band’ll just crush the competition without even rehearsin’ once, right?!) (Of course we’re a fuckin’ mess! This ain’t some manga, after all! Miracles like that don’t happen!)

Koga: (Damn it, damn it, this is so embarrassin’!) (Sakuma-senpai’s even lendin’ me his power! If it still ends in disaster, ain’t it clearly cause I’m too weak n’ inexperienced?!) (I’ll end up puttin’ a black mark on Sakuma-senpai’s brilliant battle record!) (I don’t want that to happen! That’s why! I’ve gotta do somethin’ about this! I have to…!)

Kaoru: Calm down, Pup~ Relax, relax~ ♪

Koga: Haah!? Th-th-th-this ain’t the time to be calm! D’ya even understand our situation right now, ya damn playboy!?

Kaoru: First of all, could you at least try to understand that panicking won’t help? Sorry. It’s pretty pathetic of me to act like some know-it-all senpai now, huh… You’ve probably figured it out by now but, see, this is my first time standing on stage. And, well, actually performing on stage really is totally different from just watching from the sidelines, huh? I can’t breathe properly. The lights are hot and blinding. The sweat’s making me feel all gross and clammy. My mind’s filled with these sorts of trivial worries; I can’t focus at all. My heart feels like it’s skipping beats, and my limbs feel numb. It feels like I’ll just collapse if I don’t brace myself… It’s scary, isn’t it? The real deal. Standing on stage like this… I’m finally realizing that, even though it’s way late.

Adonis: Me too… I’m sorry, Oogami. It seems I’m just as nervous as he is. In the past, I used to do little dances with my mother, who was a singer at the time. In those days, I was young, carefree, and fearless: I had my reliable mother by my side. Without even thinking about it, I could naturally behave appropriately. Perhaps it was thanks to my mother’s guidance. She was the one who made me shine. But right now, I don’t have that guidance. I have to lead myself. It makes me anxious, and afraid… I feel as though I am lost in the dark.

Koga: That so? Guess I can’t be your guiding light, huh? It’s hopeless. Sure enough, without Sakuma-senpai around… I’m useless.

Adonis: Speaking of Sakuma-senpai… I just noticed, but isn't that him standing in the pit?

Koga: Ah?

Adonis: Talking to you guys helped me calm down a bit, so I am able to pay more attention to my surroundings now… Look, Sakuma-senpai is in the audience, waving a glow stick.

Rei: Kya~✰ Undead¹~♪ Do youw bwest~ Don’t wose²~♪

Koga: I was hopin’ he’d show up, but… What the hell is that idiot senpai doing?!

Adonis: It’s a mystery. However, he appears strangely pleased.

Kaoru: Th-that's so unfair, Sakuma-san! You’re also a member of UNDEAD, so like!? Get up on stage!

Rei: Ahaha. I know, I know. Wasn’t expectin’ to hear that from you though, Hakaze-kun. You seemed to be the one with the least motivation n’ sense a’ camaraderie out of us all.

Kaoru: Okay, whatever, just hurry up! C’mon, quickly! If you don’t do your job properly, I won’t pay you the commission fee, y’know?

Rei: Aw, geez~ You’re so hopeless, N*bita-kun³… You get all anxious and stawt cwying when mama isn't awound, huh~? Thewe, thewe ♪

Kaoru: …You probably didn’t know, but, Sakuma-san, you totally just stepped on a landmine. Don’t look down on me too much, ‘kay?

Kaoru: ―I’m not just a spoiled crybaby anymore.

[ ☆ ]

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Rei is likely mispronouncing UNDEAD on purpose here. It’s normally rendered in all-caps ENG, but here it was written not only in JP, but in hiragana as opposed to katakana (which is what's typically used for foreign words).

Rei says ganbae rather than ganbare, and makeyuna rather than makeruna. Children often have trouble pronouncing “r” sounds, so dropping them from words makes you sound childish. Combined with the mispronunciation of UNDEAD (You know what else children are bad at? Foreign words), he’s purposefully acting cutesy in an obnoxious, over-the-top kind of way. Ganbae in particular is somewhat infamous as it was popularized, for lack of a better word, due to a story about a middle-aged man shouting it at the top of his lungs while standing among a crowd of young girls at a PreCure show. So, yes, Rei is 100% being cringey and embarassing on purpose. I chose to render this as uwu speak because hearing a punk teen at a rock concert speaking this way would generate the exact same instinctive, visceral “wtf is wrong with you?” reaction from bystanders.

Yet another Doraemon reference. For those unfamiliar with Doraemon, Nobita, the main character, is an extremely lazy boy who constantly skips school and is unwilling to put real effort into anything. All this gives him a reputation as a dumb and frivolous person who can’t do anything without help, but he’s actually fairly intelligent, as well as kind and generous. (As a side note: Doraemon (who Rei has compared himself to on multiple occassions) is a magical wish-granting robot cat who came from the future in order to help Nobita onto a better path in life.)

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Avengers #298: DISASTER!!!

December, 1988

EDWIN JARVIS -- the last Avenger?!

WELL SOMEBODY HAS TO CARRY THIS BOOK.

Fuckin’ Thor.

Oh, I should contextualize that.

Last times in Avengers: Dr Druid, under the influence of Nebula Kang (who is later revealed to be Ravonna pretending to be Nebula pretending to be Kang. For some reason), manipulated events to get rid of Captain Monica Marvel and become chairman of the Avengers.

After a brief attempt to kill Thor with a dinobot, Druid and Nebula Kang managed to put Thor, She-Hulk, and Black Knight under mind control, so Nebula Kang could use them to get into a time bubble in time and find some big weapon that the Kang Klubhouse wanted.

Some Kangs interfere, breaking the Avengers out of mind-control. The Avengers fight Nebula Kang and Dr Druid, leading to the two to get sucked into a time hole. Like a plot hold, but in time. The Avengers go home and She-Hulk quits in shame for what she did under mind control. Thor decides this is a good a time as any to just totally dissolve the team and takes off with Black Knight to go do Asgard stuff.

Leading to an awkward situation where there’s an Avengers book but no Avengers.

DISASTER!!! about sums it up. It being Walt Simonson’s run on this book.

HEY OOOOOH!

That’s not nice but I don’t have to be nice.

His Thor work is still a contender for best run the character has ever had but his Avengers work... eugh.

And since I don’t have to be nice...

Its funny that the Mets win right as Inferno is getting into full swing. Hell may not have frozen over but New York is certainly going to something quite like Hell!

So an Avengers book without any Avengers means that its Jarvis’ time to shine again.

Just like how we washed out the bad taste of Avengers #200 with a fun Jarvis back-up story the following issue.

If you don’t recall, Jarvis fought a bully of the neighborhood who had damaged his mom’s groceries.

Speaking of Jarvis’ mom...

She’s amazing.

Ma Jarvis needs her stories.

And her stories are: wrestling and General Hospital.

The television stops working on top of the air conditioning not working. And when she tries to call someone about it, it turns out the phones aren’t working!

Mrs. Jarvis: “#@%*!!! The phone line’s dead! What the #%@!! is this? A @#!!* conspiracy?!”

Jarvis offers to assist and Ma Jarvis must be in a bad mood because she eviscerates him. Not literally but she says some hurtful things that would be hurtful if Jarvis didn’t take it all in good humor.

She points out that A) he kept wearing his eyepatch long after his injuries from Avengers Under Siege healed. And B) He’s unemployed because the Avengers folded. And C) the Avengers never bothered to teach him anything useful like television repair.

Now to be fair to Jarvis.

A) He probably just wanted to look as cool as he is. I say let Jarvis wear an eyepatch.

B) Yeah, jerk move of the Avengers to just disband on a dime like that. But he at least has a nice pension from them that’s supporting Jarvis and his mom.

and C) “They taught me self-reliance... and the true value of teamwork.”

She’s so grumpy!

Granted. No air conditioning and no tv makes Ma Jarvis something something.

Jarvis walks down the street and goes into the first reputable television repair shop that he sees.

Unfortunately, there’s an epidemic of television malfunctions today (probably because of Inferno) so all of the television repair guys are working overtime and haven’t found the problem yet.

Repair shop guy: “I dunno what’s goin’ on around here! Me? I’m thinkin’ maybe New York is finally headin’ into the toilet!”

Jarvis: “Colorfully colloquial but unfortunately, an apt choice of phrase. Mother will simply have to forego her afternoon’s entertainment. A daunting prospect.

So daunting that Jarvis decides not to go right home. He decides to take a trip to the Metropolitan Museum to “refresh my eyes and rekindle my flagging spirit.”

He is a man of culture.

But the subway train he’s on suddenly stalls, like the power has gone out.

With his people skills, Jarvis takes charge of the group of passengers and directs them out of the train.

I don’t know if you’re supposed to immediately leave a stalled train, honestly. Maybe Jarvis is actually pulling a boner here.

If you’re not supposed to leave a train during an apparent power outage, he definitely kinda gets someone killed.

A businessman type with a briefcase accidentally drops his briefcase on the third rail and since its full of merger information, he immediately grabs it and gets electrocuted.

The train is stopped but the third rail is still active oh geez.

Now everyone is panicking and one guy tries to run off in a panic but Jarvis trips him. Another tough looking guy takes issue with Jarvis taking charge.

Tough looking guy: “Back off, fancy pants! I’m gettin’ outta here and nobody’s stoppin’ me! Not even some guy in a silly lookin’ hat!”

Jarvis: “This hardly seems the place to indulge in sartorial criticism, sir. Rather, seeking a rational solution to our mutual problem would be more beneficial! Brace up, everyone! The walk will not kill you but the panic may. Single file, keep in the center of the track! If you drop something, leave it! Follow me, now! Carefully!”

He leads the group through the tunnel until he finds an emergency exit and then leads them back up to the street.

Once again the day is saved by Jarvis.

He even gets kissed for being such a hero, by the lady he had saved from tumbling out of the train.

Said lady Glory Garsen seems really interested in spending more time with him. Really interested. Blatantly interested.

But Jarvis excuses himself for a pressing appointment. A pressing appointment that he doesn’t have because he’s just going to the museum to relax.

Not really sure what to make of the exchange.

Also, I’m not sure how old Jarvis is supposed to be and how old Glory is supposed to be.

Jarvis later dates Aunt May for a while. And he supposedly fought in World War II by lying about his age. And its the late 80s now. But also, he doesn’t ever seem to age, because he’s around a bunch of other people who don’t ever really seem to age.

Point being, I’m pretty sure there is a significant age gap here.

Anyway anyway, after excusing himself from her advances, Jarvis finds to his disappointment that the museum is closed. Physically closed. The doors slammed shut and nobody can get them open. The Fire Department is trying to break the doors down but haven’t had much progress with it.

Jarvis reflects that this doesn’t seem to be his day and muses about purchasing a gift for his mom.

Jarvis: “I wonder where I could purchase a pair of wrestling trunks?”

Geez, she’s really into wrestling, huh? Wait, would the trunks be for her to wear? Does she herself wrestle?

Hell yeah, Mrs. Jarvis.

Instead of shopping, Jarvis decides to visit the “cinema” for he has not had the time to go in years!

God damn, the Avengers, force this man to take more days off.

Wait, you’ve disbanded. Uh... enjoy your retirement, Jarvis!

Anyway, he heads to the Daily Bugle building in hopes that he can find a schedule of the local theaters but chances into another heroic moment.

Some bricks fall off some scaffolding, right towards a mother and her child.

Jarvis shouts a warning but then clumsy, normal photographer Peter Parker accidentally trips, grabs Jarvis’ arm, and pushes it so that his umbrella deflects all the bricks. Accidentally.

But Jarvis is not one to hold a grudge, especially since the totally accidental inadvertent assistance helped save the two bystanders from getting severely bonked.

Normal guy Peter Parker walks off but since Jarvis is looking to take in a movie at the local cinema, Peter suggests Roger Rabbit because “his wife’s a knockout!”

(Quickly checking and yup, Who Framed Roger Rabbit did come out the same year this issue did. That’s fun.)

Peter’s suggestion is one Jarvis can only agree with, after the movie is over.

Jarvis: “That young man was right! Roger Rabbit’s wife! My goodness! Such... ample... drawing!”

Jarvis, you horn dog.

He decides to phone home and tell his mom when he thinks he’ll be coming home, accounting for walking time because he has a bad feeling about getting back on the subway again.

But there’s already a line at the phone and it seems the phone isn’t even working! The cigar chomping guy at the phone complaining that nothing has worked right since AT&T was busted up.

(That’s another time stamp for the issue. That would have been about four years ago at the time of this issue. We’re learning stuff today.)

Anyway, the phone apparently takes offense to cigar guy’s abuse and lassos his neck with its receiver.

This is why people prefer cordless phones!

I love how unfazed Jarvis is by this. He just saw Roger Rabbit and that gives him the context to decide that things are just acting like cartoons today. So he’ll just follow cartoon logic.

Since Inferno seems not to be in full swing, that makes him one of the earlier people to realize that wacky demon stuff is just like cartoons.

So he just puts more money into the phone until the receiver lets go of the guy and jumps back in its cradle.

Because, why not!

Anyway, Jarvis isn’t fazed by all this nonsense but he also knows its not just another typical day. Since the Avengers are disbanded - THANKS, Thor - Jarvis decides to place a call to someone else.

He stretches the cord as far as it will go so the phone can’t attempt to strangle him. But when he dials the number, the phone insists he needs to insert $429.45 to complete the call.

Jarvis: “I see. Well, my technological friend, two can play at this game! Complete this call and I shall feed you all the change I possess! Frustrate that effort and I shall return momentarily with bolt cutters... and sever your receiver! You’ll never eat in this town again!”

Phone: “Click.... bzzzzzzzt... ring... ring... ring...”

Jarvis: “Ahh.”

He freaked that phone.

Later, a mysterious man enters a mysterious base in Brooklyn, mysteriously.

Look, this isn’t too much of a mystery.

Its a guy that Jarvis knows and Jarvis trusts. And its a guy carrying a circular object that can block lasers.

It’s the Captain America.

The whole point of slowly breaking Roger Stern’s Avengers roster was to put Steve Rogers back in charge the way nature intended.

Its definitely not the new Captain America. Why would Jarvis have his phone number?

Anyway. Jarvis doesn’t know what’s going on with the Captain America’s life so he keeps the message vague. Something is weird in Manhattan and people haven’t realized it yet. He requests this mysterious Steve Rogers shaped stranger meet him at the Brooklyn Bridge so Jarvis can Explain It All.

And the Captain America gets a firsthand experience with how screwy things are getting when one of the computers in his secret base starts moving around and shooting lasers at him.

Not things that computer was designed to do.

The Captain America throws his mighty shield and that right there is evidence this is Steve Rogers because that computer sure does yield. By exploding.

Mysterious guy: “I wonder if this isn’t precisely the sort of thing Jarvis was calling about. I think I’d better make that rendezvous and fast!”

Meanwhile, Jarvis chilling by the bridge.

When he hears an EEEEEEEEEEEEEK! and calls for help oh help.

And its Glory Garsen!

The woman from the subway who kissed Jarvis!

Small world!

She’s also stuck between two cars despite two beefy looking dudes’ best efforts. Because the small world is also a malevolent world.

Jarvis applies some more cartoon logic and gives one of the cars a good poke in the eye - or headlight, rather - and it pulls away.

Burly guy: “You did it! But... I don’t believe it! It backed off! All by itself!”

Jarvis: “Injury to the eye motif, my good man! Even the strongest willed individual will shy away from a pointed stick!”

That’s such a particular phrasing “injury to the eye motif.” Jarvis, have you been reading Fredrick Wertham’s book?

I saw that particular phrasing in Cerebus too but the arc in question came out later than this issue.

Imagining Jarvis reading either “Seduction of the Innocent” or Cerebus the Aardvark honestly floors me. But he did partake in a Who Framed Roger Rabbit that he really enjoyed so maybe I shouldn’t guess his interests.

Anyway.

Glory Garsen admits that it isn’t a small world. She’s been stalking Jarvis.

She’s damn tired of being single and she’s not letting a good guy walk away just because he’s shy.

Oh so it was shyness? Sure.

Look, even if the dating scene sucks, you shouldn’t stalk handsome butler types.

Then the day gets weirder.

A giant robot? man comes VARROM VARROOUMing down the road and tries to knock Jarvis’ block off.

Hey, its the guy from the cover. Except much greener.

And he THROWS A CAR AT JARVIS!

Yeesh. This guy must be evil. Hating Jarvis like that. For shame.

When Jarvis dodges the car, the robot dude grabs him and starts squeezing him TO DEATH!

Well, not to death yet but he’s trying.

But Jarvis SPAKTs the guy in the non-broken eye and the robot rears back and goes “WHEEEAAAPP! BEEEEEAP!” in distress.

But it doesn’t drop him and its clutching him so tight that he passes out.

BUT THEN!

BUT THEN!!

Someone mysterious throws a disc-shaped object and when the mysterious someone throws a disc-shaped object, the robot guy has to yield Jarvis to the ground.

C’mon, its obviously the Captain: “The first round’s over, demon. You aren’t related to an answering machine over in Brooklyn by any chance?”

Oh, so the thing that attacked the Captain America was the answering machine. Glad we cleared that up.

Glory Garsen drags the unconscious Jarvis to safety while mystery dude engages the robot dude.

And mystery dude gives a lot of pointers while he fights. Or... like, condescending pointers. Talking about how much the other dude sucks. “Your cornering’s pretty weak!” sort of thing.

The robot dude rips a manhole out of the ground to try to fight the Captain America but again he yields when bonked with a high velocity trash can lid shaped object.

Then the Captain America punches him in the face over and over until... the guy turns into a car.

Huh.

I guess it was the car that was trying to squish Glory and that Jarvis broke the headlight.

IT CAME BACK FOR REVENGE!

Inferno is weird.

Also, huh. It wasn’t so many issues ago where Thor was fighting a robot T. Rex that was more than met the eye. And now a car transforms into a robot mode and back again...

You a big Transformers fan, Simonson?

Jarvis shares the previous car incident with the Captain and tells him that there’s been more incidents like this around New York today.

Jarvis: “I couldn’t think of anyone more qualified to wrestle with such an emergency. But I do think that it might prove troublesome should this animated plague spread to every inanimate object in the city!”

The Captain: “So you think that I won’t be able to handle what’s going on by myself?”

Jarvis: “The thought never entered my mind, Captain. I merely suggest it might be prudent to enlist the aid of a few worthy friends as you have done so successfully in the past. Strength in numbers, sir. I could hold your coat. And besides, I would like to have my old job back.”

The Captain: “Pretty sly, Jarvis. I think maybe we’ve been electing the wrong man chairman of the Avengers all these years!”

Pretty sly, indeed!

But yes, Steve! Put the Avengers back together! Even if its the Worst Roster!

Also, he takes off his mysterious coat and hat and runs off. Just in case anyone didn’t get that it was Steve Rogers the Captain somehow.

Glory Garsen practically squeals over meeting the original Captain America.

But Jarvis gets melancholic because what woman wouldn’t prefer Steve Rogers over a guy like Jarvis.

Glory reassures him that she didn’t stalk him halfway across Manhattan to give up on him now. She’s still very insistent that Jarvis be her boyfriend.

She’s not looking for a superhero, just a man both gentle and courageous and dammit she thinks she’s found that in Jarvis.

So Jarvis agrees to date her. And they start dating.

It doesn’t look like she shows up all that often after this. And one wonders why write a story where a seemingly younger woman throws herself at Jarvis.

I mean, I know he’s a catch. You know he’s a catch. But why was this narrative conceived and executed?

We may never know.

And its maybe not the best sign for their relationship that Jarvis internally congratulates himself on saying a cool thing and can’t wait to tell his mom about it.

But whatever! Jarvis had a good day! A whole issue to himself. He fought a car twice. Fought a phone. Saw Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Set the wheels in motion for the Avengers reforming. Got stalked by a woman until he agreed to date her.

A good day for Jarvis!

Follow @essential-avengers​ for all the Jarvis content the Avengers provides. Even if it always falls short of how much Jarvis content we’d like. Like and reblog and comment, maybe. I love attention and feedback.

[1moreoffkeyanthem]

I love that everyone is coming to talk to you about fanfics, haha! Don't mind if I join in - tell us about your favourite style fanfic tropes. 😎

Fr lmaoooo idk where all this is coming from but I’m here for it!!!!

OH BOY DO I HAVE A LOT OF STYLE TROPES!!!

Okay so WEARING EACH OTHERS CLOTHES!!! God I eat that one up every time it’s so cute like I just KNOW growing up they had half their clothes at each other’s houses and constantly lost track of who owned what shirt and THEN!!! As they got older and weren’t the same size anymore (personally I’m a big boy Stan truther but it’s precious the other way too) and Kyle started absolutely SWIMMING in Stan’s baggy ass sweatshirts and Stan gets cuteness aggression lmao he’s just like awwww look how cute my super best boyfriend is in the peace love pine trees hoodie asjdjdkgfj

Calling each other “dude” romantically!!! Like other pet names come into play but dude stays bc it’s them

WHEN THEY HAVE THEIR OWN SECRET UNSPOKEN LANGUAGE like they’re always on the same wavelength totally in sync with each other!!! They understand each other like no one else, can read each other like a book, fully on the same side and will follow each other to the ends of the earth!!!

Okay okay we all know I STAY reading and writing style whump and PROTECTIVENESS!!! When they worry about each other constantly and get so freaked out when one of them isn’t okay I eat that shit UP every time I love them defending each other, physically or verbally, like no one fucks with Stan without experiencing Kyle Rage and vice versa!!! When Stan is the one to completely flip his lid and panic because Kyle’s hurt or in danger just AAAAA

On that note: TAKING CARE OF EACH OTHER!!! There’s a reason most of my stories have a “yep I injured the boys again” tag because I LIVE for the sweet sweet tender moments after an Incident where they’re patching up each other’s wounds all worried and Soft, talking each other through the pain and telling them that it’s gonna be okay bonus points if we get a tearful “I could’ve lost you” “you didn’t, I’m right here” GOOD SHIT RIGHT THERE!!!

On THAT note (sorry I’m just fucking insane) STAN CARRYING KYLE!!!!!!!!! Once again I’m a short angy Kyle/ big boy Stan truther and I looovvvvveeee a little bridal style carrying moment holy shit (I’m surprised I didn’t put any of that in my style week stuff lmao) like I am fully guilty of putting my favorite redhead in Situations JUST so I can have that, like I gave OrangeJuiceVerse Kyle chronic knee pain, diabetes, an ed, and Stan carries him so much lmfao someone put me in Making Kyle Suffer Jail

Ok another one I love is Kyle as the Voice of Reason! Like when he’s the go to guy, savior complex mom friend who just wants to take care of everyone! And boy howdy does Stan not make it easy lmao between him and Kenny (the disaster duo) that man is Exasperated

THEM BEING EACH OTHERS RIGHT HAND MAN!!!!! Fighting side by side, Stan and Kyle against the world! When they can depend on each other more than anyone else and trust each other with their lives. Stan would follow Kyle into a burning building and Kyle would pull him out! That trope is why I’m so feral about stick of truth like they gotta be on the same side or they feel like somethings missing (codependent bastards)

Stan playing guitar for Kyle/ Kyle reading to Stan!!! The domesticity ugh I love it

Casual cuddling oh my godddddd like even before they got together they’re always touching each other in some way and Cartman’s like it’s fuckin gay to cuddle at sleepovers you guys are 15 and they’re like fym it’s not gay to cuddle the homies? (It so is) best friends to lovers on TOP!!!

Them generally being huge simps like PLEASE why y’all staring longingly also in the same vein them thinking the other is the most beautiful thing in the world those two are DOWN HORRENDOUS

I also reeeaaaaly like when they’re kissin… and it starts off all slow and sweet… and then it gets more passionate… and suddenly Stan’s hands are tangled in Kyle’s hair and Kyle’s pushing him against the wall and they’re practically falling into each other desperate to be closer and whispering “I love you” into each others mouths and nothing in the world exists other than the two of them and

Lmao that’s some of my favorite style tropes I’m super normal about them obviously