#like we still live together and are friendly we have no beef we’re both just sad that it didnt work out in the end

[opiumvampire]

this is long sorry but i wanted to make a statement for the press (treat tumblr like a public diary) and the children of divorce (mutuals)

i know that obviously i am heartbroken that joeff and i had to split and part of me is really angry that it had to happen that way but its not like its anyone’s fault. this is a no fault divorce. we love each other we just couldn’t continue the relationship. but i go home and i see him and we hang out and its normal but then i remember that the future we wanted is dead and THAT is a horrible feeling but the worst feeling would be not having him in my life at all and i am glad that we love each other enough to be friends and we were friends for so long before we started dating bc then we know that we can do it. im glad we’re going to be apart for a few weeks bc it is still really raw but ultimately it is for the best and we agree that we are soulmates just maybe not romantically. which sucks but the right person for us will be glad that we didnt force ourselves to stay together just for the comfort of familiarity. i just have to tell myself that it wasnt a waste of time and everything will make sense eventually even if it doesnt right now and i want to be mad but theres nothing to be mad about except sometimes life is unfair but you live it anyway.

[prue84]

National Treasure instagram: 8 September 2022

Fandom: BBC’s Merlin (post-canon, modern magic) AU AU: National Treasure Series: National Treasure instagram

Mandatory social post by Arthur Pendragon for the news of Queen Elizabeth's death.

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Arthur had been in close contact with the Queen since he returned - or, at least, since Merlin couldn't keep the world outside of his cottage's door anymore and had to allow people to get near Arthur (a crime, if you ask him!). Being Elizabeth the current monarch of the British Islands, Arthur always respected both her authority and her role in the kingdom (a kingdom definitely bigger than his own; it took him months to wrap his head around the fact she was ruling over a united Albion. And Merlin by then had still to touch the whole "Earth is round" and "English Empire" subjects). Too different and with a ridiculously crazy age gap for any chance to become close friends (literally children of two different millennia), they stroke a cordial rapport nonetheless and even enjoyed a couple of horse rides together (one on the shores of lake Avalon, no less). The picture captures a friendly moment between former King and current Queen during one of the private visits the Queen (with Prince Consort Philip) did to check the progress of the restoration work on the castle that has then come to be known as the Pendragon Castle of New Camelot. Queen Elizabeth officiated both the grand opening of the restored castle and the ceremony for the founding of the New Camelot enclave, but Arthur choose to celebrate Her Majesty's memory with a more private picture from his personal collection. For Arthur, the passing of the Queen is a sad day.

More about the AU (and ramblings about UK Royals) under the cut.

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Disclaimer I don't mean to express any opinion on the figure of the Queen nor Elizabeth Windsor's persona. I am Italian, so I don't hold any resentment toward the UK Royal Family, their role in the society, their flaws or crimes. Nor, at the same time, I'm loyal or feel drawn to them either. I'm not even a fan. Sure, I hear the news (unfortunately, media here are treating the funeral like you can expect - no matter that we're holding politic elections or that we aren't a British colony so she wasn't our queen - but media are enamored with the Royal Family and their shenanigans since Princess Diana) but neither I cheered nor I cried when the announcement was made. Since in this AU Arthur meets and has close ties with the Queen from his return and prompted by Bradley Jame's tweet, I just wanted to make a mock-post about the death, because I feel Arthur would. Arthur's opinion don't necessary reflect my own. He's a medieval king, after all. He almost respected Sarrum, why wouldn't he respect an old woman who seems more decent than the guy who tortured his sister? Sure, he might have some beef with how modern royalty works, but he'd ascribe that to "bloody modern times". Besides, the woman didn't bat an eye when her nephew and future heir married a "commoner": that's enough to get brownie points in Arthur's opinion.

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About the AU It's the 21th century and the existence of magic has been widely known since Guinevere, the last queen of Camelot, lifted the ban and had made Merlin her own advisor. With the centuries the myth of the Once and Future King has grown unchecked: Arthur Pendragon belongs to the category of the great people of history who the most have influenced the world, with the only difference that he will one day return. Magic, for a number of circumstances never verified (possibly a mix of abuse and industrialization), seems like having been drained, leaving only the passive one: charms applied to old houses or objects still works, but new charms cannot be cast and are ineffective. Immortality is a rare gift unavailable to most, but few people belonging to the world Before The Drain still live, the oldest of them born in the Late Renaissance age. Merlin, former wizard and oldest man of the world as the only one alive since the Middle Ages, is considered the world's grumpy uncle, that one parent who is a font of knowledge and tells funny stories about an otherwise serious topic like History but isn't willing to sit down and socialize with the youngsters (which means basically anyone, to him). Told to be always traveling, he imparts his knowledge almost exclusively through his blog, "Merlin's Cave". Unknown to all, though, Merlin has also a second identity under which he lives an almost ordinary life: Gaius de Bois, young professor of Medieval History at the University of Avalon, down-to-heart person, a professor much loved by his students, and, especially "nephew" of the Great Merlin. Arthur Pendragon emerges from the secluded Lake of Avalon and his return is made official by Merlin with a post on his Instagram, a photo about the two halves of a broken coin (with Merlin's and Arthur's profile) reunited. Arthur leads a quiet life, residing in Merlin's cottage on the shores of the lake, with his grumpy (not-so) former servant to protect him from meddlers and fanatics. To preserve and allocate the necessary resources to restore a conducive environment for him and his needs of Middle Ages man, he is given the title of National Treasure that grants him a monthly revenue, total coverage of expenditures and funds to restore the castle of Camelot – castle that Merlin has preserved by magically miniaturizing it and placing it in a snow-less globe. Merlin, through his social media and website, shares with the world the chronicles of how his king is adjusting to the modern times. Arthur is initially followed by paps and generally by the curiosity of the people: it's just Merlin's angry presence (and an endless stream of ordinances) that shelters Arthur from the frenzy although soon it becomes an ordinary sight to see the king going around wearing his armor and sunglasses. When Camelot is restored, it gets the status of Principality within the United Kingdom, a kind of enclave named New Camelot on which Arthur is granted absolute power: initially a city-state enclosed within the strong walls of the citadel, it grows when further lands and pastures are assigned to the principality to assure Camelot's self-sufficiency. Life in New Camelot, per Arthur's choice, doesn't reflect the innovations happened after the king's death, and the citadel will become a haven for people who wish to live a simpler life or simply unplug a bit from the modern times. With time Arthur will fully embrace the perks of modernity, thanks to Merlin (and his money) who spoils him, and he'll even get a driving license (against Merlin's will). But that's another story for another time.

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Notes I didn't know what Arthur would say (he would say something complimenting her and how he appreciated having to do with her? Something more formal?) so initially I decided to steal the purple heart posted by Bradley James on his Twitter. A last-moment change, right when I was in the middle of the posting, turned this into a simple "farewell".

Tec stuffs (aka Behind The Manip) It took me more time to search for pics than to make the manip itself. It's embarrassing. But find a Bradley pic that would work and then find a proper fitting pose for Queen Elizabeth wasn't as easy as it seems. Also. I meant to work on this as soon as possible but it's been an awful two weeks for me, starting with 27 hours of head spinning and then having hard time to sleep and... well, let's say I manip only during specific hours and I was in bed sleeping in those hours so... yeah. But I had to finish before the window closed on Monday, so here I am. Original manip is way bigger but it was scaled down to 1080px as that is the maximum size of the pics on Instagram. Instagram graphic made all by-hand, with much moving/copy/pasting and, especially, a wearying research to find out which font the website used. No template site. Since I created my own template (with a couple of tweaks, including not cutting a longer IG Story title), it won't reflect any future changes the platform might make (I have no intention of modify my template).

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Credits Bradley James at Pierrefonds, 19 June 2012. Photo taken by Yavannauk (yavannauk.livejournal.com - also here on Tumblr, but cannot tag). Queen Elizabeth in Windsor, 21 April 2016. Photo found at Royal Family Around the World (worldroyalfamily.blogspot.com/2016/04/queen-elizabeth-ii-and-prince-philip_21.html).

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Crossposted Livejournal: prue84.livejournal.com/90084.html Dreamwidth: prue84.dreamwidth.org/81859.html Deviantart: deviantart.com/prue84/art/8-September-2022-instagram-929982431 (instagram post) and deviantart.com/prue84/art/8-September-2022-photo-929983641 (photo)

[spine-buster]

The President Wears Prada (William Nylander) | Chapter 14

A/N: Thank you so much for the reviews on the last chapter.  I hope you guys like this one! :)  A quick reminder that I’ve set up a Ko-Fi incase you want to support my writing --> ko-fi.com/spine_buster .  Enjoy!

December 25th, 2019

Aberdeen Bloom was celebrating Christmas.

Siena was home from Ottawa, having finished another semester of law school.  Camden was the first one up, naturally, screaming at everybody that it was time to open presents.  The family had been to Midnight Mass the night before, a tradition Orla had the family do every Christmas since they were young.  After opening presents, everybody would shower and help her make the day’s big lunch before passing out in food and wine comas all over the house.  If all went well, Gramma Frances and Grampa Alistair would call and they’d all say hi in a short FaceTime.

“Get up!  Get up!  Get up!” Camden could be heard screaming from the hallway, his footsteps getting louder and louder.  “It’s time to open presents!”

“If he comes in here I’m gonna scream at him,” Siena mumbled into her pillow.  Aberdeen laughed from her side of the room.  

“Siena!  Aberdeen!”

“We’re coming!” Aberdeen yelled, not bothering to move.  

“Hey mom!  Can I finally try coffee?!” their little brother wouldn’t shut up.

The girls snorted, with Siena groaning as she stretched in her bed, unable to fall back asleep.  Eventually they got up and got ready, their little brother’s screams getting too annoying to ignore.  “He’s getting more annoying as he gets older,” Siena said playfully, running a brush through her hair.  

“Yeah,” Aberdeen agreed, “but at least he doesn’t jump into mom and dad’s bed like we did.”

“Remember that time you almost punctured dad’s lung?”

Aberdeen snorted.  “Remember that time you almost broke mom’s nose?”

“Maybe we should do it again for good measure.”

The girls finally emerged from their room, finding Orla in the kitchen pouring coffee.  Camden was dragging Mirza out of his room, Mirza playfully pulling him back in so Camden would slide on the floor.  The family hugged each other before Aberdeen opened a cupboard to get the Chips Ahoy cookies.  Camden snatched one right from her hands.  She chased him around the house.

Opening presents was always fun.  This year, Aberdeen was able to ask around the office for something for Camden, and she ended up with a Kyle Lowry Raptors jersey.  When he opened it, he automatically loved it and hugged it like he was five and it was his favourite new toy.  Aberdeen’s parents gifted her practical things – a chic new laundry basket and a nice throw she could use when she cuddled with Minerva and a bag of Doritos, and Siena bought her two new books she’d wanted to read.  To his credit, even Camden’s gift was cute: a mug that said, “Cat hair, don’t care” in fancy lettering.  

Once the gift giving was over and the family room cleaned of all the wrapping paper, everybody started to get ready.  Orla began seasoning the roast beef and Mirza began preparing the potatoes.  The kids showered and got ready so they’d look nice for photos and for their eventual FaceTime with their grandparents.  Siena stayed on the main floor to begin whipping up the trifle.  Aberdeen brought Camden to the downstairs kitchen with her to help with seasoning and roasting the Brussel sprouts and carrots.  

“So what are the Maple Leafs doing today?” Camden made conversation as Aberdeen sliced the carrots and he laid them in their tray.  

“Which ones?” she asked.  “It’s not like they’re spending it together as a team.  They’re all spending it with their families.”

“What’s John Tavares doing?” he asked.  Camden knew much more about sports than she did.  He found it genuinely cool that his sister was working for the Toronto Maple Leafs, even though he liked the Raptors a little bit more.  When she told him how she sat with Masai Ujiri at the Major Donor Gala, he freaked out and bragged to all his friends.  He was officially one of the coolest kids in school.

“Well, John and his wife Aryne just had a new baby in September, so this is their first Christmas with him.  I think they’re spending it at John’s house with both their families there,” Aberdeen explained.

“What about Auston Matthews?”

“Auston’s entire family came up from Arizona – they’re having a big family lunch like we are.”

“What about Mitch Marner?”

Aberdeen smiled.  “Mitch is spending it with his family, his girlfriend Stephanie, and his dog Zeus.”

“His dog?!” Camden’s face lit up.  “Mom and dad won’t let me get a dog yet.  They say I’m still too young.”

“Just wait,” Aberdeen encouraged him.  “Mom will eventually want to replace me and Siena with a dog, and dad will be too powerless to say no.”

“You think so?”

“Mhm.  What kind of breed do you want?”

“I want a German shepherd.”

Aberdeen laughed at her brother.  He always dreamed big, which was good for a kid his age, but a German shepherd would be bigger than him.  There was no way he’d be able to handle it out on walks.  “Aim smaller.  What about a corgi?”

“That’s your dream dog cause of their butts,” Camden furrowed his brows.  “If mom won’t let me get a German shepherd then I think I want a goldendoodle.  Greg at school has one and it’s really cute.”

“Why don’t you just get a regular poodle and cut its hair really weird like that lady in 101 Dalmatians?”

Camden started to laugh as Aberdeen sliced the last of the carrots.  She made sure they were all lined up nicely before starting on the Brussel sprouts.  “We can shave the Toronto Maple Leafs logo into its hair.”

“Exactly!”

“Then it can become the team dog!” Camden giggled, liking the idea already.  

Aberdeen and Camden stayed in the basement kitchen for almost an hour – enough time so that all the carrots and Brussel sprouts were sufficiently roasted and seasoned properly as Orla taught them.  When the carrots were ready to be brought upstairs, Aberdeen made Camden put on oven mitts and told him to grab the dish.  “Go run these up to mom,” Aberdeen said.  “And absolutely no funny business.  If these fall on the floor nobody in this family will forgive you.”

Camden did as he was told, going up the stairs slowly.  Aberdeen stayed down for another ten minutes, waiting for the Brussel sprouts to finish before putting on her own pair of oven mitts and bringing the plate upstairs.  By then, the roast in the oven smelled impeccably delicious and Aberdeen could already see most of the food on the table as she rounded the corner.  Before she could move any further, Siena came through and blocked her passage and sightline towards the front of the house, a look of panic on her face.  “Ab—Aberdeen,” she was staring at Aberdeen wide-eyed, like she’d just seen a ghost.

“What?  What’s going on?” Aberdeen whispered.

“Hey.”

Aberdeen knew that voice.  She knew that voice anywhere.  She’d be able to recognize it from miles away.  It was the voice that tortured and soothed her all at once.  What was it doing here?  In her house?  Her head turned quickly like she was in The Exorcist.  

And there he was.

William Nylander.  Standing in the middle of the family room.  Her family room.

With her mother.

Aberdeen was going to pass out.

“What are you doing here?” she demanded, almost dropping the plate of Brussel sprouts at her feet.  What was he doing here?  What was he doing here?  How the fuck did he even find out where she lived – where her family lived?  And why did he have a glass of water in his hands?  How long had he been here for him to have been offered a glass of water?  Why didn’t she hear the doorbell?  Why didn’t she hear a knock?  Why hadn’t her parents called down to her in the basement to let her know he showed up unannounced to their Christmas Day family celebrations and why didn’t they—

“Aberdeen!” her mother scolded her as she walked towards her.  “I know he’s a little early but that’s no way to treat the guest you invited.”

Aberdeen glared at William and then glared at her mother.  She was almost rendered speechless by William’s stupid grin on his face.  “I did not invite William to Christm--”

“Aberdeen, please, the Brussel sprouts,” her mother wasn’t having it, walking towards her and grabbing the plate from her hands, only to put it on the table.

Aberdeen looked at William, dressed in a nice pair of navy blue slacks and a fitted grey Ralph Lauren sweater with a collared shirt underneath.  He definitely looked the part of innocent-hockey-player-come-to-spend-Christmas-with-a-welcoming-Canadian-family, but he wasn’t fooling her.  Aberdeen looked back to see her mother disappear into the kitchen again.  Siena was already gone, too.  Good, it made it safe for her to cuss him out.  

“How do I look?” he asked, waiting for one of her famous retorts.

He wasn’t going to get one.  Not this time.  He looked too wholesome, but more than that, he didn’t deserve one for crashing her family Christmas.  “Seriously, what are you doing here?” she hissed as she stepped forward so she could get closer to him.  

“Better than spending Christmas alone,” he shrugged his shoulders, the playful grin still on his face.  

“I thought you were Skyping with your family,” she said, immediately regretting it.  She knew Skyping was nowhere near close to spending actual time, physically, with your family on one of the most important holidays of the year.

“I already did, while I was having breakfast and they were having lunch.  Six hour time difference,” he said.  

“Will, I’m serious, what are you—”

“I thought you’d need a friend here after everything that happened,” he said quickly, his tone serious.  His blue eyes looked into hers and every ounce of anger and shock in her dissipated.  “I figured you probably haven’t told your parents, and definitely not your brother, but I know you told Siena, and I just thought it would be nice for you to have a friendly face around beside your sister that…I don’t know…might make Christmas more fun.”

He knew her.  He knew he so well that she almost hated it, but mostly found it so admirable and so damn…cute.  He knew that she’d only tell Siena because Siena was the person she was the closest to in the world, and he knew she wouldn’t tell her parents because…well, because they didn’t need to know their daughter got sexually harassed at work.  She didn’t know what she was feeling right now.  “How do you even know where my parents live?”

That trademark grin came back.  “Don’t worry about it.”

“Aberdeen!  You didn’t tell me William Nylander was coming for Christmas!” Camden’s voice rang from behind her.  She turned around to see her brother with his arms crossed playfully around his chest.  “Would have been nice, you know.”

“I guess I forgot,” she said absent-mindedly.  She couldn’t believe this was happening right now.  She couldn’t believe William was at her house for Christmas; that he was going to be spending Christmas with her family because, well, it wasn’t like she could kick him out onto the street now.  

“Did you see I brought a dessert?” William said, his voice upbeat as he looked at Camden.  “I picked up some treats from a Swedish bakery in downtown Toronto.”

Camden’s eyes lit up at the words.  “Double dessert!” he screamed.  “Siena made a trifle!  You’ll like it.  It’s got strawberries in it.”

“Alright!  Everyone to the table!” Orla’s voice boomed throughout the house.  “Is the wine on the table?  Are there drinks?”

“Does everybody have a spot?” William whispered to Camden.

Camden nodded his head quickly before pushing William to the opposite side of the table.  “Mom sits at the head,” he pointed, “Siena sits there, dad sits there, I sit at the other head, and then Aberdeen sits here.”

“So I guess I’m sitting—”

“Right here,” Camden took out the chair for him.  

William took his seat.  Aberdeen slipped into her seat beside him, still staring at him like he wasn’t real.  Siena took her seat, then Mirza.  Camden last.  Then Orla brought in the roast, smelling absolutely delectable.  William’s eyes widened at how good it looked.  Everybody brought their plates forward and she put a few slices of the carved meat and gravy onto everyone’s plates – only then did the other dishes get passed around to fill up their plates: the Yorkshire puddings, the roasted potatoes, the Brussel sprouts, and the carrots.  

“Are you Catholic, William?” Orla asked as she sat down at her seat.  

“No ma’am.”

“Well, Christmas and Easter are the only two days of the year that we pray before our meal,” she informed him.  “So, congratulations.  Camden, why don’t you say a Hail Mary.”  William watched as everybody around the table except Mirza did the sign of the cross, though Mirza did bow his head in respect.  William quickly followed with his own sign of the cross.  He listened as Camden recited a Hail Mary.  When he was done, Orla spoke up again.  “Lord, we would like to thank you for bringing us together to celebrate your birth, and we would like to thank you for bringing us William today to celebrate with our family.  Amen.”

“Amen,” everyone said.

“Hallelujah!” Camden exclaimed, grabbing his fork.  Everyone else did too, while Mirza stood up to start pouring the wine in everyone’s glasses, save for Camden.  

“So you mentioned your family is in Sweden, William?” Orla asked, slicing her roast beef in pieces.  “Whereabouts?”

“Most of my family is there, right in Stockholm.  But I have a brother living in Chicago who also plays hockey.  My sister Jacqueline is also in Texas at SMU playing tennis, but she was able to get home for Christmas,” he explained.

“And where’s your brother in Chicago going?”

“He has a teammate and his family.  He lives in their basement,” William smiled. 

“Orla has a habit of wanting to feed the entire congregation, if you know what I mean,” Mirza smiled from across the table.  “Clearly Aberdeen knew, since she invited you.”

Aberdeen wanted to say that she didn’t, that he was hear because he somehow found their address and wanted to make her life a complete circus, but she decided against it.  It was Christmas, after all.  “Yeah, well when Aberdeen offered, I thought it was so nice, but I didn’t want to intrude,” William said from beside her.  She could have killed him right then and there.

“Intruding?  What are you intruding on?  The more the merrier.  And God knows I make enough roast,” Orla commented.  “Besides, it’s not the first time Aberdeen’s brought something home and said ‘Surprise!’.”

“We all love Minerva and she is a great cat,” Aberdeen said firmly before anyone else could say anything.  

Conversation flowed nicely.  William was a natural, Aberdeen thought, and she chalked it all up to his endearing charm – his best quality.  Well, at least to Aberdeen.  It was what attracted her to him in the first place.  That and the fact that he was so persistent.  But everybody seemed to take a liking to him, and despite being the only person at the table who knew what had happened between them, Siena was surprisingly calm, warm, and chatty.  Camden was an everyday 11 year old, asking William about the Leafs and if he’d met any Raptors and what playing hockey was like.  He made them smile.  He made them laugh.  He made them love him.  It was all so sickeningly sweet.

Camden cleared the dishes and Aberdeen cleared the food platters and Orla and Siena fetched the desserts. Mirza stayed to keep William company at the table.  Aberdeen watched as Orla scooped all the remaining leftovers into a Tupperware – Aberdeen knew she’d give it to William when he left, and now she was stuck thinking about how William was going to return one of her Tupperwares without anybody on the team or in the offices knowing.  It sent her head for a bit of a spin until Camden almost knocked her out with a swinging fridge door.  “Camden, get the dessert plates on the counter,” she ordered, and he did as he was told.  She got the trifle out of the fridge.

“Show him mine!  I was so much cuter!” she heard Camden exclaim from the dining room.  What was he on about now?

Aberdeen turned the corner.  And then she saw it.

William Nylander.  Sitting at the dining room table with her father.

Looking through her baby book.

Her heart dropped into the pit of her stomach.  “Dad!!!” she exclaimed.

William looked up at her, the biggest, goofiest, most sincere smile on his face.  “You were a cute baby, Aberdeen.”

She was mortified.  She thought about walking outside and freezing to death because that would be a better option than what was happening in front of her.  She set the trifle down on the table loudly, her jaw on the floor.  “Dad, come on!” she complained.  “I work with William!  He doesn’t have to see my baby pictures!”

“Well excuse me for wanting to show off my two darling daughters,” Mirza waved off her complaint.  “Besides, I can’t say no when a guest wants to see.”

Aberdeen glared at William, who still had that smile on his face.  “Oh, you’re gonna get it when we’re back at the arena.”

“Am I?” he taunted her.

“Look!  Look here!  Siena at four, Aberdeen at two,” Mirza diffused the situation, pointing to a new picture on the page.  “We sent copies of this one to Orla’s parents in Derry.  They had it up for years.”

Aberdeen knew exactly which picture Mirza was talking about.  She and her sister were photographed by a professional photographer, with Siena wearing a frilly yellow dress and Aberdeen wearing a pink one, equally as frilly.  They were both smiling at the camera while sitting on some sort of box, and both wearing small, dainty necklaces.  They were adorable, but William didn’t need to know that.  “These are evil eyes, right?” he said, pointing to the necklaces they were wearing in the photo, a small smile on his face.

“We say nazar.  It protects from the evil eye,” Mirza nodded his head.  “They’re very popular in Iran.”

“What made you come to Canada?” William asked.

“The revolution, mostly,” Mirza said.  “I was fourteen.  My parents didn’t want me to stay so they changed my name and I escaped the country.  It wasn’t safe for me anymore.  I went to Syria first – to Aleppo – and had all my documents processed there to become a refugee.  I came to Canada when I was eighteen in 1984.”

William was quiet and had a solemn look on his face as he listened to Mirza.  It was so unlike any other story he’d heard before, in terms of people’s parents at least.  He grew up with a lot of “My dad played in the NHL” or “My dad works in hockey” – never “My dad escaped a revolution”.  It was very new to him, and he almost felt ashamed at the lack of diverse stories his friends, acquaintances, and all the kids he grew up with had in comparison to this.  “And you chose Canada?”

“Canada chose me, I think,” Mirza smiled.  “Look at these pictures here,” he said, flipping to the back of the photo album.  When he reached the page, he showed William, and Aberdeen already knew what it was: the few pictures he had of himself growing up in Iran with his parents, some photos of him in Aleppo, and the first photos of him in Canada.  “That one was the year before I left Iran,” he said, pointing to one, “and this one…the month I arrived in Canada.”

William smiled.  He looked up at Aberdeen, who was already expecting his reaction.  “Sugo hat outfit,” he said, like it was a code language.  “Holy hell.  You weren’t kidding, Aberdeen.”

“Told you.”

“Sugo hat outfit?” Mirza asked.

“It’s nothing, dad.  William just has an interesting fashion sense.  Very European.”

Mirza shrugged, letting it go.  “Canada led me to Orla.  Led me to have this,” he motioned around at his house, “led me to my job, led me to be a father,” he nodded towards Aberdeen.  “Canada has been very nice to Orla and I, because even she had her troubles.  Literally.”

“Troubles?”

“Orla grew up in Belfast and Derry during the Troubles in Northern Ireland.  There was religious violence all around her growing up.  Catholics versus Protestants,” he explained.  “She came to Canada to escape it, too, in 1988.  And it brought us together.  We met in 1993 at our citizenship ceremony, married in 1995, and had Siena in 1996.”

William couldn’t help but smile.  Meeting your future spouse at your citizenship ceremony as you swore an oath as a new citizen of Canada?  “That’s the most Canadian thing I’ve ever heard,” he giggled.

“I know!” Mirza smiled along with him.  “Orla married the mailman – I mean literally married the mailman.  You should have heard all the jokes we got from her friends when she got pregnant with Siena.  They never ended.”

Dessert and most of the afternoon continued as thus: retelling old family stories and recounting family memories as everyone devoured both desserts, with William explaining each of the Swedish pastries he’d picked from the bakery.  They called their grandparents in Derry just as they were finishing, with William politely staying out of view, and then everybody relaxed around the house.  William promised Camden he’d teach him some stickhandling tricks with the old sticks they had somewhere in the garage, “once my food baby has passed.”  Mirza and Orla sat on the couch, watching the Christmas specials on TV.  Camden opened and started to organize the pieces of a Lego set he’d received as a Christmas gift on the dining room table.  Siena, Aberdeen, and William went down to the basement to “watch Netflix”.  They got through one episode of Brooklyn 9-9 before Siena told them to sneak back upstairs into hers and Aberdeen’s bedroom for some alone time.  Aberdeen tried to say no but William was already up.  When he winked at Siena as a thank you, Siena immediately understood what attracted Aberdeen to him in the first place.

When he walked inside Aberdeen’s room, he thought that it was everything yet nothing he imagined all at once.  A small twin bed, a stylish comforter, a view pictures of her with friends strung along draped string and a corkboard above her headboard.  “So this is your room?”

Aberdeen nodded.  “Well, used to be just Siena’s room.  Then when the little monster was born we moved in together.”

“You didn’t care?  Didn’t demand a room in the basement?”

Aberdeen shook her head.  “I told you how close Siena and I are.  I actually didn’t mind at all.”

He sat down on her bed, looking up at some of the pictures she’d hung.  He recognized Kasha in one of them, and what he assumed to be other university friends.  There was even a picture of the family together, for what looked like one of Camden’s birthdays.  “You have such a nice house…” he started, looking around some more.  “A nice, like, home.  It’s very homey and just, like, perfect.  And your family’s really…warm,” he said, choosing his words carefully.  “They remind me a lot of mine.  Close knit and stuff.  You’ve all got each other’s back.”

“Yeah,” she agreed, sitting down on her bed next to him.  “Does it…I mean, does it make you miss your family?”

“Tons,” he replied automatically.  “Especially on days like today.  But it’s okay.  I know this summer when we’re all together it’s gonna be a blast.”

“I know…” Aberdeen began.  “Listen, I know you don’t like to talk about your feelings much, but if you ever do want to talk when you’re really missing them…you know I’m here to listen, right?”

William looked at her and smiled.  God, he got so lucky.  “I know,” he said.  “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.”

He paused, staring into her eyes before knowing he had to continue.  “Listen…I got you something,” he said.

“You what?” Aberdeen was flabbergasted.  As if enough didn’t already happen today.  He saw her baby photos for God’s sake.

“I couldn’t help myself.”

“I really think you could.”

He sighed and smiled, reaching into a bag Aberdeen hadn’t noticed was there and pulling out a wrapped box, a ribbon tied around it perfectly.  She had a hard time believing he wrapped it himself, but then again, he had a lot of siblings.  That was his excuse for knowing how to do a bunch of things that he had no other logical explanation as to why he knew how to do it.  “Merry Christmas, minskatt,” he said.

“I don’t have anything for you,” she blurted out, immediately regretting it.  

“I don’t need anything.  It’s fine,” he shook his head, pushing the box onto her lap.  “Open it.”

It was small.  Too small for her liking.  She gave him one last look before sliding the ribbon off and ripping the paper.  The box was neutral, which made her even more nervous.  She opened the lid.

Inside, she was met with a ring.  An evil eye ring made of yellow gold, with the centre of the eye bedazzled with a black diamond, circled by two bands of rich blue diamonds, and finished off with regular diamonds outlining and filling out the rest of the eye shape.  Her breath hitched in her throat audibly as she stared at it and took in its beauty.  She couldn’t believe William got this for her.  She couldn’t believe he…he…

“I hope you like it,” she heard William’s voice say softly.  “I know rings are…well, whatever, but…I saw it and I thought of you.  It…it went beyond when you told me your dad was Persian.  The blue…it sounds stupid, but the blue reminded me of your tattoo.  The waves.  Like now whenever I see anything blue I think of you and your tattoo and the waves and stuff, and…and—” he was rambling, and he knew it, but he couldn’t stop, “—and I just figured, I don’t know, you always wear nice jewelry, nice rings, and this can be part of it.  And it’ll protect you, according to tradition or whatever.  And maybe, I don’t know, every time you look down at your hand and see the ring, you’ll be reminded of me.”

Aberdeen took every word to heart.  She’d been looking at him the entire time, and her heart was so full by the end of his rambling that she couldn’t think straight; she couldn’t think of what to say, how to say it, how to thank him, how to truly express how much she loved it, so she did the only thing she could think to do.  The only thing she couldn’t do.

She kissed him.

It was slow at first, and it took William aback – never in a million years did he think Aberdeen would initiate any kiss, let alone a kiss on her bed while they were alone in her bedroom after he’d crashed her family’s Christmas celebrations – but eventually, and gradually, the kiss deepened and became more passionate, with William’s hand going lightly to her hip, and Aberdeen’s hand resting gently on his thigh.  They stayed like that for a while, just kissing on her bed, William absolutely basking in the feeling, as if a thousand lightning bolts were moving through his body all at once, having waited for months – six months – to feel his lips against hers again.  It intoxicated him as much now as it did that night in June so long ago; perhaps even more so now, now that he knew what her lips felt like but was denied for so long, only to be given the luxury again.  He was drunk on the feeling.  

It was only until William couldn’t help himself, when Aberdeen felt a slip of his tongue against her lips, that she was brought back down to earth, only for her to pull away quickly.  “Oh God,” she worried.  “I wasn’t supposed to do that.”

William half smiled as he bit down on his bottom lip.  “It’s not like I’m gonna tell anybody.”

She felt William’s hand on her hip move to hold her hand that was resting on his thigh.  He held it so warmly, still looking at her, and rubbed circles onto her hand.  His touch was so delicate, so tender.  So unlike other touches she’d experienced, other touches she never wanted to experience again.  “Will?”

“Hmm?” he licked his lips.

She finally met his eye.  “I…I never thanked you for going to Brendan about…you know…” she trailed off.  

His face shifted.  “Aberdeen—”

“No – please,” she interrupted him, looking down nervously at their fingers that had now entangled with each other’s on his lap.  She didn’t know why she couldn’t look him in the eye.  She’d just kissed him, for God’s sake.  “I never thanked you.  Or Pierre for that matter.  If you guys hadn’t gone to Brendan, I’d still have to be dealing with him, and…and I just…”

“Aberdeen, you don’t need to thank me for doing the right thing.  Anybody would have done the same thing,” William said.  “Believe me.  Any one of those guys in the locker room would have done the same thing.  Pierre and I actually made the decision to wait until after the holidays to tell everyone what happened so they wouldn’t get upset before Christmas.”

Aberdeen furrowed her brows.  “Why?  They…they’d get upset?”

“Are you kidding me?  Of course they’d get upset,” William said.  “Jason would have gone insane if he knew.  The guy has four girls.  Auston, Morgan, Kappy – everyone thinks you’re a bit of nerd or whatever, but they’d all go to bat for you.  And everyone’s gonna be really upset when they hear about it.  Actually, they’ll probably get mad at me for not telling them so they couldn’t whoop Ethan’s ass themselves.”

Aberdeen never considered that.  She knew the guys liked her well enough, but she never considered that they liked her enough that they’d be upset something like that happened to her.  She never considered that they’d be protective of her in that way.  For all that she was Brendan Shanahan’s executive assistant and on the administrative side of things, she never felt part of the team more than she did in this moment, in her room alone with William Nylander.  

“Can you…can you tell me something?” William asked as he watched her think.

“What?”

“Why didn’t you tell me…you know, what Ethan was doing?”

There was the million dollar question.  Aberdeen didn’t want to admit why.  She didn’t want to admit to William that the reason she didn’t tell him was because she didn’t want him to know, didn’t want him to get involved, didn’t want to endanger his position in any way with the team by him speaking up on her behalf.  She didn’t want to tell him it was because she didn’t think it was worth it.  But she knew she had too.  She took a deep breath and shrugged her shoulders.  “I didn’t think you cared that much,” she admitted softly.  “I didn’t think that it was…you know…worth caring about, even.”

It was William’s turn to furrow his brows.  He looked pained, physically pained, at the words that had just escaped her mouth.  “You’re always worth caring about, minskatt,” he said firmly, with no space to debate his tone or words.  “You’re always…fuck, Aberdeen, you’re always fucking worth it to me.”

She couldn’t believe the words that were coming out of his mouth; couldn’t believe how much conviction was in his voice and how much he meant each and every word.  Nobody had said those words to her before.  Well – no guy had said those words to her before.  She remembered Zane and how he refused to acknowledge how she wanted to become a writer.  She remembered how, a second after she told him, William said she’d make a great writer even though he’d never read any of her work.  To William, she was worth it; in every sense of the word, she was worth it.  She was worth late night walks back to her apartment.  She was worth sneaking into hotel rooms at night.  She was worth calls to Sugo and paying extra to get dinner long after they closed down.  She was worth sneaking around to get her phone number, and her parents’ address to show up for Christmas.  She was worth spending whatever amount of money on a ring that reminded him of her.  She was worth it.  She was worth it all.  

She moved closer to him again.

Closer.

And closer.

And…

“Aberdeen!” she heard Camden scream her voice down the hallway.  So he apparently knew they were in her room.  She and William moved at lightning speed not to be so close to each other.  She shoved the box into her bedside table.  Camden’s loud footsteps echoed down the hallway until they stopped outside her door.  

Camden at least had the knowledge to knock.  She’d yelled at him one too many times for him to forget.  “Come in,” she said, her voice still a bit shaky from what had almost just happened.  

He opened the door and stuck his head through.  “William promised he’d play some hockey with me in the driveway before he left,” he said.  

“William and I are talking right now,” she said quickly, trying to get him to go away.

“About what?”

“About work stuff.”

“What’s happening at work?”

“Camden.”

“Is Mitch Marner okay?”

“Can you give us maybe, like, five or ten minutes to solve this problem?” William asked.  “I’ll meet you in the driveway after that.  Practice your stickhandling so I can show you what to improve on.”

Camden nodded his head quickly and closed the door behind him as he rushed back down the hallway, yelling at his dad to open the garage and get his hockey stick.  William looked at Aberdeen and laughed as she let out a breath in one long sigh, giggling to herself before shaking her head.  “God…what am I doing?” she mumbled to herself.

“Realizing you’re worth it,” William said quickly, inching closer to her and kissing her again.  It was nice, and it was innocent, and it was beautiful, and it was lovely, but it was also wrong.  Aberdeen pulled back quicker than last time, but William didn’t seem to mind.  He knew this kiss was gratuitous – an extra gift.  “I can’t wait to see you on the plane to New Jersey wearing that ring,” he mumbled, grabbing her hand and holding it in his.

She stiffened for a second.  “I can’t wear that to work.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s from you.  Everyone’s gonna ask about it.”

“Have any of the guys, including Brendan, ever asked about any piece of jewelry you’ve worn before?” he deadpanned.  Okay, so he had a point.  “Besides, just tell them it was a Christmas gift from your parents.”

She shook her head.  “You underestimate how good of a liar I am.”

“You spent six months lying trying to convince yourself you didn’t like me.”

She blushed.  Okay, so he had another point.  “Touché, Will.”

He licked his lips, biting down on the bottom one gently.  “Why’re you so scared?”

“I’m not scared,” Aberdeen answered.  “I’m just aware of how inappropriate this is and how much I’m starting not to care anymore.”

William smiled.  And he leaned in again.  But before he could kiss her again – helping as best he could to get her to not care anymore – Camden’s voice boomed through the house again.  “Aberdeeeeen!”

She practically growled at another moment ruined.  “Camden!” she screamed out.

This time, he didn’t bother to knock when he opened the bedroom door.  He poked his head through again.  “Do you know someone who drives a black Porsche Cayenne?”

Aberdeen furrowed her brows.  As if she knew more than one person who drove a car that expensive.  “My boss does…” she said.

“Well, it’s in the driveway.”

Aberdeen’s eyes bulged out of her head.  She shot up from her seat and grabbed William and dragged him towards her closet.  “Is that—” he tried to ask.

“Quiet.”

“Is that Brendan?” he asked as she practically tore her closet door off her hinges to open it.  “What’s he doing here?”

“I don’t fucking know!” she exclaimed in one of those loud, frantic whispers.  “Do you honestly think if I knew he was coming sometime today I would have let you stay in my house this long?  Now shut up.”

“Aber—oooooowwwwww!” he protested as she grabbed the top of his head and pushed him down and into her closet like he was getting into the back of a cop car.  He belonged in a cop car, Aberdeen thought, for showing up at her house on Christmas.  “Aberdeen!”

“Shut up!” she said hurriedly, putting her hand over his mouth.  “If you value your life as well as mine you will stay in here and stay quiet until I come get you,” she warned, closing the closet door in his face.

“Who’s that now?” Orla asked as Aberdeen hurried to the front of the house, where she saw her mother looking out the window.  “We don’t know people who drive Porsches.”

“It’s for me.  It’s my boss.  Brendan Shanahan.  The president of the Toronto Maple Leafs,” Aberdeen informed everyone.  She saw Siena send a panicked look her way.

“Oh, did you invite him to Christmas too now and he just came late?” Orla joked.

“Is he here to see William?” Camden asked.

Aberdeen took a deep breath.  She felt like her heart was going to explode in her chest.  “Everybody listen,” she said loudly.  “Brendan cannot know William was here…is here.”

“Why can’t Brendan know about W—”

“I’ll lose my job, okay?” she said quickly.  Her parents’ eyes widened.  “Brendan doesn’t like the players, uh…he doesn’t…just please, please don’t ask me to explain.  Just take my word for it.  Just don’t mention anything and…please be normal.”  She knew Siena already knew.  And she knew her parents were good for it – though she’d have to explain to them in more detail later.  It was Camden she was worried about.  She looked down at him.  “You say a word about William being here and I take that Kyle Lowry jersey back and tell everyone at your school that you still sleep with Bubby.”

Bubby was the stuffed giraffe Camden got as a kid.  He slept with it religiously when he was small, but he didn’t still sleep with it, though it stayed perched on his shelf.  Camden grimaced but understood the ultimatum his sister was giving him – no kid would ever recover from that rumour being spread.  “Fine.”

Their doorbell rang.  Mirza moved to open the door.  He couldn’t even see Brendan’s face – it was obstructed by a giant basket.  “Oh my goodness!” he exclaimed, noticing it was teetering a bit.  “Let me help, let me help!” he said, taking some of the weight of the basket.  “Come in!  Come in!” he moved backwards, and the two men balanced the basket on the half-wall that separated the entrance from the front family room.  

Aberdeen felt like she was going to faint.  Brendan Shanahan was now in her front entrance while William Nylander was stuffed in her bedroom closet.  “You must be Mr. Bloom,” Brendan said, extending his hand to shake.  “And Mrs. Bloom,” he said once he noticed Orla, shaking her hand too.  “I’m Brendan Shanahan – I’m Aberdeen’s boss.”

“It’s so nice to finally meet you, Brendan,” Orla smiled.  “Aberdeen speaks so highly of you.”

He waved and smiled at Aberdeen.  Then he noticed Siena and Camden.  “You must be Siena,” he smiled at her, “and Camden.”  Camden nodded enthusiastically and silently.  “I don’t mean to intrude on your Christmas,” Brendan held up his hands slightly.  “I just – well, my family and I are on our way to my mother’s house in Mimico.  I’m an Etobicoke boy too, you see.  And when Aberdeen told me her mother was another Belfast lass, well, I had to see for myself.”

Orla giggled.  Mirza had a smile on his face.  “Irish too, then?  Well, with a name like Shanahan, how could you not be?” Orla quipped.  

“I don’t mean to stay long – we’re already late as is – but I just wanted to pass this gift along as a token of my thanks and gratitude,” he said, motioning to the giant wrapped basket.   It had an assortment of things in it that Aberdeen couldn’t make out because she was scared William was going to scream out from the closet or walk around the corner any second and then she’d be out of a job.  She knew Camden would take it all apart the second Brendan left, anyway.

“Oh, you didn’t have to do that, Mr. Shanahan—” Orla said.

“No no, I insist.  It’s the least I could do,” he said.  “I’m sorry for taking your daughter away from you so much and having her travel to every corner of this continent.  I know it must be hard on you as parents.”

“It is,” Mirza said, “but she enjoys her job very much.  She’s always letting us know about the cool things she’s doing or the cities she’s going to.  She feels very fortunate to be in the position she’s in.”

“We’re very lucky to have her as a member of the Toronto Maple Leafs team,” Brendan smiled warmly.  “Anyways, I’m so sorry for taking up your time,” he turned to leave.

“Don’t be sorry at all, Mr. Shanahan.  This is a very lovely gift, thank you.”

As he stepped through the threshold of the doorway, he turned back.  “If I want to drop by St. Leo and bring some of the boys, am I calling you?” he asked Orla.

“You bet your arse you are, because you’re not going to anyone else’s class but mine.”

Brendan smiled.  “I’ll call you to arrange something, then.  Have a very Merry Christmas.”

When the door closed, Aberdeen let out a sigh of relief.  “Was that harmless enough, Aberdeen?  Was it to your liking?” Orla asked sarcastically.

“Don’t.”

“Camden, go fetch mummy a card from the drawer in the kitchen so we can write a thank you note to Mr. Shanahan for this enormous basket full of…full of…” she stopped, eyeing the contents.  Suddenly, she jumped up.  “Oh Lord!  Oh heavens it’s a basket of Irish and British goodies!  And sweets!  Oh, bless that man!  Bless that man!”

Aberdeen didn’t care about sweets.  She thought about William in her closet and rushed towards her room.  She closed the door to her room behind her and opened the closet door to see him holding up her high school kilt, like he was examining it.  “What the fuck are you doing with that?”

He smirked at her.  “Can you wear this for me sometime?”

“Get out of there!” she ordered, snatching her kilt away from his hands as he giggled like the schoolgirl she once was.  She hung it back up in the back of her closet.  “You’re a perv.”

“Only for you,” he continued to giggle.

***

William held on to the Tupperware Orla had given him full of leftovers as he and Aberdeen stood on her front porch.  Aberdeen made sure not to get too close; partly because she had a feeling that at least one member of her family was spying through a window, but also, because if she got close to him, she didn’t know what she’d do.  

William had charmed her entire family.  Her mother invited him back for Easter.  Camden thought he was the coolest guy around.  Siena understood now why Aberdeen was so drawn to him.  And Mirza – well, Mirza just liked him.  Thought he was a good kid.  And he was a good kid.  Despite his upbringing and despite his job being one of the stars of the Leafs, he was just a humble, polite, guy when he came over – just a guy from Sweden who worked with Aberdeen.  Aberdeen thought that maybe that’s all he wanted to be when he was around her – just a guy from Sweden.  Not William Nylander, hockey star.  He certainly showed that he liked and preferred it that way.

“You’re coming to Jersey, right?” he asked.  She nodded her head.  “What about New Years?”

“I’ll be there,” she nodded again.  “Kinda sucks that we won’t get to spend it here, though.  I think this is the first New Year’s I’ll spend outside of Toronto.”

“Well it has to be extra special, then,” he smiled.  

Aberdeen bit her lip.  She didn’t know what that meant.  A part of her didn’t want to know while another part of her did.  “Will…” she began.

“Minskatt?”

“Why didn’t you ever move on from me?”

William was taken aback by the question.  The notion was absurd to him.  “Why would I ever want to do that?”

Aberdeen couldn’t believe his answer.  Was there really nobody else for him?  Nobody in Sweden that summer he could have had fun with?  Nobody in Toronto he could call?  She didn’t know why he insisted on his life revolving around just her when she’d barely given him anything the past six months, three of which were spent in two separate continents.  Was he insane?  Was she?

A car pulled up in front of the house, and Aberdeen knew it was his Uber.  He glanced at it before taking one last look at her.  “Have a good night, Aberdeen.  I’ll see you Thursday morning.”

She watched him get into the car, watched it pull out of the driveway and drive down the street.  When she opened the door and stepped back into her house, she saw Siena waiting for her.  “You’re fucked,” was all she said.

Aberdeen nodded.  If other people could see it, then she needed to start accepting it.  “I know.”

[hopelikethemoon]

a dance owed (Javier x Reader)

Title: a dance owed Rating: PG-13  Length: 2,000 Notes: After that rude little anon this morning, I decided to write some cute fluff for these two. Set about 2 months after “maybe forever” this is another little installment in the “maybe today, maybe forever” universe. (I’m gonna make a whole post for it later today probably). Yeah, I realize this scene technically took place way before when the first installment of this series but work with me people.  Warnings: None. Pure, tooth-rotting, fluff.  Dedicated To: @grapemama​ who has some of the best daddy!javi headcanons. 

Josie was entirely captivated by the red plastic flower Javier had plucked out of the table arrangement to give to her. She kept bouncing in your lap, waving the flower around — mostly to get her daddy’s attention. You brushed your fingers over the top of her head, smoothing her hair down before you pressed a kiss to the top of her head. 

“The last time I saw Danny,” Javier remarked to his father who was sat beside him. “He was riding the big wheel down the sidewalk.” He reached over and gave your knee a squeeze beneath the white table cloth. 

“It means a lot to your tia that you’re here,” The elder Peña remarked, before looking at you and Josie. “And it’s real nice that you finally brought your girls up here to let us meet them.” 

Josie squealed and babbled, keenly aware that she was now the topic of conversation. She bounced in your lap, tossing her flower on the floor as she grabbed at the table cloth, trying to stand herself up. 

“Here,” Javi said, plucking the flower up off the floor and tossing it back on the table, before he swept her out of your arms. “You should get something to eat while you can.” He told you, pressing a kiss to your cheek. 

“Those tamales look good,” You peered across the table at Chucho’s plate. 

“Javier’s tia makes the best.”

You scooted your chair back, resting your hand on Javi’s shoulder as you stood up, giving it three quick squeezes before you headed towards the row of tables that were still filled with food. The party was in full swing — guests laughing and dancing; eating to their heart’s content. Most of the children had already escaped out the side door to play outside, but some were still running around. It was hard to believe that in a few short years, Josie would be running around like them. 

You picked up a plate at the end of the table, looking over the options. 

“If you like chili, you should try the puntas.” 

You glanced up from spooning some rice onto your plate, offering the blonde woman across from you a kind smile. “I don’t eat beef, but thank you. It looks delicious, nevertheless.” You took a few steps further down the table, using the tongs to pick up two tamales. She followed you.

“So you and Javi…” 

You looked up again, lips drawn into a thin line. “Yes?”

“It’s just,” She wistfully looked past you and you followed her line of sight over your shoulder. Javier was in the midst of showing Josie off to one of his cousins, holding her up on his thighs so she could pretend to stand. “I never thought he was the type to settle down.” 

“You’re Lorraine, aren’t you?” You questioned with an arched brow. Javier had warned you that his ex-fiancé would be at the wedding, considering she was still close to his family. 

“Oh, yes.” She flustered, brushing her hair behind her shoulders with a nod. “It’s nice to meet you.” Lorraine offered politely. 

“Likewise.” You continued down the line of food, keenly aware of the fact that Lorraine was shadowing you from across the table. 

“It was just a surprise, you know.” She started when you paused to spoon some mole onto your rice. “Even his father didn’t know until two weeks ago.” 

Your brows furrowed together, “And?” 

Lorraine shrugged, “Everyone in town has been speculating about it. Why keep it a secret?”

“Don’t you have a husband and two kids to worry about, Lorraine?” You questioned with an edge to your voice, “I don’t give a shit what the bored people of Laredo have been saying about my relationship with Javi. Some of us have jobs that require us to keep our private lives private.” 

Instead of giving Lorraine the chance to respond, you offered her a curt smile before heading back over to the table with Javier. 

“You good?” He questioned as you settled back into your seat beside him. 

Smoothing your hands over your cotton sundress, “At least I don’t look like nursing home curtains.” 

Javier chuckled, draping his arm over the back of your chair, fingers trailing over the curve of your shoulder. “That’s my girl.” 

You shrugged, cutting into your tamales and taking a bite. “I don’t know what she was aiming to do. I get it, I’m sure she’s got some lingering resentment or whatever but…” You rolled your eyes. 

He scooted his chair closer to yours, leaning in to press a kiss to your bare shoulder, “I’m gonna go talk to her, alright? Clear the air and all that shit.” 

“Don’t be gone too long, I expect a dance.” You told him, brushing your fingers over his cheek. 

Javier curled his fingers around your hand, holding it in place as he turned to press a kiss to the center of your palm. “You’ll get your dance.” He promised, before looking towards his father and Josie. “And keep an eye on Pops, he’ll have Josie drinking Bud if we’re not careful.” 

“Get out of here,” Chucho laughed, waving Javier off. 

Unsurprisingly, Josie had her abuela eating out of the palm of her hand, just like she had Javier wrapped around her little fingers. Chucho was enamoured with her from the first moment the pair met. 

You hated that Lorraine had gotten under your skin, even a little bit. Yeah, it was true that Javi hadn’t told his father about Josie until right before you made the trip to Laredo. She was almost five months old, with her first tooth starting to come in — but her grandfather hadn’t known she even existed until two weeks ago. Chucho had been surprised enough to find out that his son was bringing his girlfriend to the wedding. He’d openly wept when he met his mother’s namesake, little miss Joséfina. 

“Are you having fun?” Chucho asked you as he tried to keep Josie from prying his hat off his head. She was bound and determined to pull it off, probably just to put it in her mouth. 

You nodded, wiping your mouth off with your napkin. “Everyone’s been so welcoming. And the wedding was gorgeous.” Josie turned her attention back to you, blowing raspberries at you — you could kill Javi for teaching her that. 

“Manners, little lady.” You laughed, sliding over into Javier’s seat so you could wipe her mouth off. She giggled, trying to stick the napkin in her mouth. “Are you good to keep her for a little while longer?” You asked. 

Chucho nodded, tickling her sides to get her attention. “We’ve still got to make the rounds so I can brag about having the prettiest granddaughter.” 

“She is pretty damn cute.” You grinned at her, brushing your fingertips over her cheek before bopping her in the nose. “Don’t give her any Bud.” You teased with a wink, before you headed across the dance hall to where Javier was still engrossed in a tense conversation with Lorraine. 

“Hey baby,” Javier’s eyes lit up when he saw you coming and he rose to his feet, wrapping an arm around your waist. “We were just talking about you.” 

“My ears were burning,” You remarked, brows rising upwards curiously. “All good things I hope.” 

Javier bumped his nose against your cheek before planting a kiss there. “Of course.” He promised, looking between you and Lorraine then. 

“I was telling him that it’s probably for the best that we didn’t end up married.” Lorriane stated. “I think we ended up where we’re supposed to be.” She laughed breezily, shaking her head. “I still just can’t wrap my head around the idea of Jav being a father.” 

“He’s a really good one too.” You answered, resting your hand on his chest. “But don’t be deceived, he’s still an asshole.” 

“Baby.” He clicked his tongue against his teeth, shaking his head. 

You grinned up at him, your fingertips toying with the bit of skin peeping out of his shirt. “You know it’s true.” 

His hand slid from your waist, giving your ass a quick squeeze. “I owe you a dance, come on.” Javier looked back at Lorraine, “Give Randy my best.”

“Good luck to both of you.” Lorraine smiled politely. “Josie’s a beautiful little girl.” 

Javier took your hand into his, guiding you out onto the dance floor. “I haven’t danced in years.” He confessed as he settled one hand at your waist, the other holding your hand against his chest. 

“That seemed like a tense conversation.” 

“Ten years later and she’s still sore about me leaving her at the altar,” Javier chewed at the piece of gum in his mouth a little more harshly then. “It’s good though, baby. Water under the bridge.” 

You curled your other hand around the back of his neck, playing with the hairs at the nape of his neck. “What did you tell her about Josie?”

“I told her we were dealing with some deep shit in Columbia and for her safety we kept it quiet.” He shrugged. “It’s not too far from the truth.” 

“She’s got your father wrapped around her finger.” You mused, watching as Chucho carried Josie around the room, introducing her to the long list of relatives and friends that were there. 

“Everyone adores her,” Javier told you with a warm smile. “And you.” 

You laughed, “Really?”  

“Mhm.” He hummed with a nod, swaying a lot to the music with you. 

“I think they’re just shocked.” You teased. “You go to Columbia, take down Pablo Escobar, and then come back with a baby and me.” Everyone had been so kind to you. His tia had spent a good twenty minutes getting to know you, his cousin’s new bride had been friendly — inviting you along to brunch with some of the other women in the family. 

Javier attempted to spin you around, before he gave up and pulled you back against his chest, both of you laughing at just how bad you both were at dancing. “Do you want all of this?” He questioned, glancing around the room. 

“So you and Lorraine did talk about more than just Josie and the past.” You weren’t exactly surprised about that. You chewed on your bottom lip and shook your head. “No. The only thing I want out of this is your aunt’s tamale recipe.” You quipped. 

“You’re sure?” He pressed, running his hand up and down the length of your back. “I always thought all little girls dreamed of getting married.” 

You draped your arms over his shoulders, rising up on your toes to press a kiss to his lips. “No, Javi. I didn’t sit around imagining myself getting married.” You rolled your eyes. “What did she say?” 

“Shit about how she figured I’d pull the same stunt on you.” His shoulders tensed. “Told me I was afraid of commitment — acted like not telling Pops about Josie was part of it.” 

You couldn’t help but laugh, “I hope you told her she was wrong.” 

“Course I did.” Javier chewed his gum with some force, his eyes flickering away from your face guiltily. 

“You’re such a dumbass.” You huffed, tugging at the hair at the nape of his neck. “Do you want to get married, Javi?”

“No.” 

“Neither do I.” 

“Good.” Javier sighed heavily. 

Your lips parted, ready to say something else, but Chucho interrupted you — holding Josie out in front of him. “Someone’s had an accident.”

She squirmed and giggled, seeming entirely unphased by the fact that she was a stinky little thing. 

“I’ll get her bag,” Javier said, pressing a kiss to your cheek before he headed towards the table. 

“You are so stinky,” You complained to Josie in a playful voice, holding her carefully as you gave her grandfather a sympathetic smile. “Sorry.”

“It happens,” He shrugged, looking towards Javier. “You’re good for him, you know.” Chucho told you. “Javier was a good kid, but he always wanted out of here. Never seemed content with anything.”  He shook his head slowly. 

A faint smile spread over your lips as he stared at Chucho. “We’re just taking it one day at a time.” 

“That’s all any of us can do,” He said wisely, nodding his head towards Josie. “When the two of you decide to give her a sibling, you better tell me before they’re half a year old.”

Javier stopped abruptly beside you, looking confused. “What?”

Chucho gave Javi’s shoulder a squeeze. “I was just telling your pretty lady that you’d best tell me next time you have a kid. Preferably before they’ve got teeth coming in.”

“I’m going to go change her,” You told Javier, dipping out of that conversation. You couldn’t blame everyone for being curious about your relationship. Marriage, babies, a future. That’s all they cared about, especially given that you were at a celebration — not a funeral. Even Danny’s new bride had probed you for information when you’d joined her for brunch. 

You and Javier? Didn’t do conventional. All that mattered was that you loved each other and loved Josie. Everything else? Eh. It didn’t matter.

[night-rise]

F.O.W.L’s PLAN

F.O.W.L... The fiendish organization for World larceny..

They live up to their reputation of being fiendish. A group of criminal masterminds with enough power, brains and resources to give people like Scrooge and Darkwing Duck a run for their money. They are a threat that have the capability to destroy the entire duck family.

Scary part is... that’s just what they’re doing this season..

Their sights are set on anyone connected to Scrooge McDuck and they have stepped out of the shadows to challenge them and destroy them once and for all...

But how?

What’s the plan? What plan can be great enough to challenge them? The Duck family have conquered shadow armies, an alien invasion and have defeated countless other villains.

This beautiful family is strong and is growing stronger with each new ally they meet. BOY’D is a freakin super robot now! And we have Lena! She’s already an army in one lol What could FOWL possibly do to match this families strength?

Well that’s what we’re here to find out! And I think I got something.. Something that very well could be the end of Scrooge and his family...

Hey guys! NightRise here with another head scratching theory that will have you up all night pondering

In my previous and first FOWL theory (which I would suggest you go read before reading this. It’s super short don’t worry lol) I talked about the connections between the Bounce serum and Fentons Energy Crystal. How they both could be related to a larger scheme because both are related to BOUNCING.

But how do these two things fit in with fitches journal? The thing that seems to be FOWLS main focus this season.

What’s the missing piece to this plan?

Well I’m here to kick start the many possibilities that is FOWLS plan and help you all see the connections. Maybe you’ll take something from this to help with your own theories.

Now I’m telling you right now that this theory is absolutely a stretch and has about a 50% chance of being accurate. For the obvious reasons being that we’re not even half way through the season yet and we still have so much more of FOWL left to see.

But because of the pieces that I found connecting so well together and the show going on a little hiatus (boo) I thought I’d go ahead and drop this off now.

It’ll be my final theory on this fiendish organization and I want to share it with you the good people so you have something during the break to think over and keep you up at night theorizing.

So with that VERY long introduction out of the way, lets rise into this:

I’ve been thinking a lot about the bounce serum and it’s capabilities. What FOWL was going to use it for and how they think it’ll help them rule the world.

But how exactly? How does bouncing help with that?

Black Heron said she wanted to use the serum to create super soldiers to cause mass destruction and chaos across the- ... (Why am I having Captain America flashbacks...?)

Anyway!

But the thing with that is from what I’ve seen the Bounce juice doesn’t really cause mass destruction when its consumed by a normal person. It just makes them bounce and invulnerable to fall damage. It didn’t create a shockwave of destruction or anything like that when they landed. So how is she going to cause destruction with it?

Bouncing is only good for escaping or surviving from high up places. How could it possibly destroy anything?

Well I got to thinking. What happens when we bounce in a second story house on the top floor? It creates a stomp. A loud BOOM!

Vibrations

And the higher we jump the greater that vibe is. So I got to thinking where would strong vibrations be the most effective and catastrophic?

UNDERGROUND!

Earthquakes!

According to an adorable red hatted nerd we know, Earthquakes are shifting plates that move.

But as also stated by another adorable duckling “who’s pushing the plates”

(Okay so you might already know where I’m going with this and like I stated previously this is what I meant by this theory being stretched and far fetched. But this was the ONLY connection I could make with this so please bear with me, you’re about to see the connections I PROMISE)

There are only one species I know that are capable of causing earthquakes with little to no effort..

The final piece that I think is in FOWLS plan is.......

The Terrafirmians!

I know, I KNOW it’s crazy. And some of you are probably already leaving but HEAR. ME. OUT. PLEASE. Let me SPEAK. Cause I’m about to explain why.

As usual I’ll try to keep it as brief as I can:

Terrafirmians, ancient rock like cretrues that live in a society deep underground. Not much different from the above ground civilization.

Their capability to move around the earth effortlessly is amazing. And they are incredibly strong. With little to no effort they were able to make a clean safe passage back to the surface for the Duck family in a matter of seconds. Their rock like exterior makes them almost impenetrable.

Honestly they would make the perfect soldiers for anybody.........

So why wouldn’t FOWL want them in their army? They certainly can find a use for them. One specific use in general:

To use the juice

The Bounce juice is an organic drink, so you can’t give it to an army of robots. And we’ve seen what happens when you give it to a normal person. Not much.

But the Terrafirmians with their already tough exterior (which was redesigned in this reboot series. From furry and plush to rocky and tough) would cause a lot of damage if they were bouncing around everywhere. Bouncing is how they operate. They bounce and crash into rocks. But instead of digging right through the earth they’ll bounce right off of it, creating vibrations.

That serum would be perfect for them. Perfect for FOWL. An impenetrable army that could cause so much destruction in an instant. It’s the perfect plan.

Think of the time gap between the two missions involving the bounce serum.

Why did Heron return after so much time had past?

For so many years she could’ve attempted to capture Beakley and get the serum information she needed. So many chances. Why wait? Why was FOWL so quiet for so long and then suddenly pick up where they left off DECADES ago?

What changed?

I’ll tell you what changed. The plan changed. The original idea they had for the serum.

When Heron was explaining the plan she didn’t really sound like she had all the pieces together. Just soldiers bouncing “here, there and everywhere”. It was messy and not well put together.

It sounded like a disorganized plan for an organization.

FOWLS original plan was incomplete and had too many errors. So it was unnecessary at the time. That’s why FOWL didn’t try to go after the juice the first time Heron failed to acquire it. They weren’t desperate. They didn’t need it then. They found it unnecessary.

So why is it now that they are trying to complete that mission? What makes now different from back then? Why is it now necessary to acquire the serum after all this time?

Because they found the final piece they needed.

The Terrafirmians

But wait! How are we even sure we’d see them ever again in this season? Well because we only saw 4-5 of them. There’s an entire civilization of these guys. Are we really not going to explore more of them? This season is all about Huey so why wouldn’t we go back to the first obstacle he faced in the series?

Think I’m crazy?

Remember what Bradford Buzzard said at the end of Double-O-Duck? “We’re going to take it from them. From right underneath McDucks nose” UNDERNEATH! That’s gotta be a clue.

Their FOWL base!! Its underground! They moved from a tower to an underground lair. WHY? The tower looked perfectly fine to me. It seemed to be working just fine. Why move underground? That’s another clue.

But how does Fitches journal (which was found UNDERGROUND) fit into all this? Well allow me to explain.

The Terrafirmians are a peaceful friendly tribe, that have no beef with surface dwellers. If they had a problem with them they would’ve showed up a long time ago. But they haven’t. It’s obvious they want peace.

This doesn’t fit in with FOWLS plan though. So they are looking for a way to change the Terrafirmians way of thinking. Take away their peaceful ideals. They want to corrupt them. Control them

Mind control.

They are looking for an artifact that helps with that. It’s become obvious that they are not looking to acquire every artifact in that journal.

If that was the case they would’ve been there to steal the Harp from the ducks or showed up after they left to take it. But they didn’t. Not a sign of them anywhere.

And they already have the third eye diamond. Found in their personal archives. (How that’s possible is full of theories that I will leave to someone else to work on lol)

But by the way it was presented in the episode Double-O-Duck, it didn’t seem like it was needed. Or important. Just a side project. Why?

Because they are after a SPECIFIC artifact. One that would help with controlling the Terrafirmians. That’s what Bradford meant by “The race is on”. The race to the final key they need. The final key like...

The Stone of What Was!

“STONE”. That’s already connected to the earth. There’s a chance this stone is with the Terrafirmians. Or it might be the case that this stone will help whoever has it find the hidden civilization that is the Terrafirmians.

Kinda strange they’re saving that one for last, don’t you think?

Could that be the final thing they need? Would that bring them total control? Who knows but it’s interesting that the creators of the series would save that adventure for last.

But wait, how does Fentons crystal fit into all of this? How would that help FOWL in anyway?

Well if my previous theory was correct, Gandra is already working on that solution.

See that’s the thing about theories everybody! When you do them, include everyone that applies to it!

Putting certain characters in scenarios that fit them. And that’s what I did with Gandra. Shes a scientist plus she has a connection with Fenton. Her and Fenton obviously are going to meet again. What else would she possibly work on?

She’s going to replicate Fentons experiment on a larger scale. Wrap the Terrafirmians in that same synthetic crystal, like clothing or Energy suits, to boost the power of their bounce.

The greater the bounce the greater the vibration.

FOWL is going to control an army of Terrafirmans, give them bounce juice and wrap them up in Fentons Synthetic crystal so they’ll be powerful enough to create INSTANT EARTHQUAKES!

But not in a city wide rage! Specific locations. FOWL said they don’t want to destroy the world. Just the Duck family. In fact they don’t want to destroy the world at all. But steal it from everybody else. What better way to do that then to have an army of earthquack making soldiers that can split up and target each individual family member and take them out unsuspectedly?

FOWL said it themselves they want to do things smarter. What’s smarter than an earthquake making army you can’t see coming that can take you out before you even know what’s going on? At anytime. ANYWHERE.

The very world itself would turn against the Duck family. It’ll be robbed from them!

They don’t call it “WORLD LARCENY” for nothing am I right?

Magica and Lunaris already tried taking the aggressive approach and failed. Now FOWL wants to do things more stealth like. In the shadows. Leaving no trail that will lead back to them. The charging head first method has failed multiple times so FOWL is trying something different.

Still think it’s crazy?

Well check this out:

What do you guys notice about this picture? For one thing it has every target that FOWL is after on it. But what else do you see? Where are they?

In the sky..

Now why would everybody meet up in the sky? Is it because maybe the ground is currently unsafe? Hmmmmmmmm?!

Brute force is not going to work this time. It’ll be a battle of intelligence. Lucky for us we have a duckling that can out brain all of FOWL

They might have an army

But we have a Huey...

I’m looking forward to seeing the outcome of this season. This hiatus WILL be the end of me I just know it lol but it gives us the fans plenty of time to figure this out. I’ll be looking forward to taking this journey with you all.

If I said it once this season I’ll say it again

BRING. IT. ON. F.O.W.L.

[spurious-result]

For MGS ask: 8, 15, 18, 38.

Ooooh, those are good ones. :)

8: Favourite little detail in a game?

I have a several of these I could mention (because seriously, the attention to detail in this series is TOP NOTCH), but I’m going to say the way that DD always hops out of the helicopter and immediately sniffs around looking for a place to pee before he’s ready to do anything else.  100% relatable.

I ❤ that dog SO HARD.

15: Quotes you think about most often?

Ah, lots of good choices here!  This will also not be a terribly original answer, but I do really love: “Life is worth living, even if it hurts you.  Even if you hurt in it.”

Both because I think it’s a really interesting insight into Snake’s character, and also a pretty profound way of looking at the world.  Sometimes you can find nuggets of good life advice in a video game.  So major props, for that particular bit of dialogue.

18: Most wtf scene?

Oh, goodness.  Really, the entire series is one big WTF moment in some ways, so lots of great contenders here. 

So, a story.  Mgs2 was the first Metal Gear game I was ever exposed to, back in the day.  My dad and I used to play video games together when I was younger, and we thought we’d give it a try - knowing nothing at all about the series or the characters, just that it looked like a stealth/shooter game of some kind, and we usually liked those.  

So we’re plugging along through the Tanker chapter, and everything is making a reasonable amount of sense.  Taking photos of this walking tank thing, terrorists hijacking the ship, etc.  All good.  The old Russian cowboy dude is a little trippy, but we can work with it.  

AND THEN.  Things take a turn, and it all gets SO MUCH BETTER.

Because it turns out, the Russian cowboy has a possessed arm!  With a different voice, and a British accent!!  And the arm... seems to have some kind of beef with us, for some reason??  There’s a history here, evidently.  We seem to know both the Russian guy, and the arm, but separately.

And I am FUCKING SOLD on the series from that point on.  

For real, what I have always loved about mgs as a whole is the juxtaposition of characters that are just, beautifully written/voiced and give me so many feelings, and the absolute batshit craziness of the plot.  You have to embrace both of those things to really appreciate the series in all its glory.  There’s nothing else like it.

(I would also be happy to expound further on other examples of this, if anyone wants me to.  Lol.)

38: Thoughts on the fandom?

I’ve been a fan of mgs stuff for a long time, but only recently began getting involved with the online fandom so I’m still a relative newcomer here. :)  But, my experience has been very positive overall.  Everyone I’ve met has been friendly, and the overall vibe seems kind and supportive when it comes to posting creative stuff - which is not always the case in every fandom, sadly.

Keep it coming, artists and writers!  I love seeing your work. ❤

[vgckwb]

P5R: Rebel Girl (A FeMC Story/P5R Rework) Chapter 34: A Fine Line Between Simple and Complicated

Saturday evening. Ann was wandering around Central Street. Ryuji had messaged her earlier about “Making it up” to her, but she didn’t know what that meant entirely. Still, Ryuji seemed earnest in his attempt, so the least she could do was make an appearance.

“Hey!” Ryuji called out. Ann turned around to spot him. “Over here!” Ann walked up to him. “So, are you ready?”

Ann was confused. “Ready for what?” she asked.

“For me to make it up to you,” Ryuji answered.

Ann stared at him. “What does that mean?!” she shouted.

“Urgh! Sorry…” Ryuji said. “I’m gonna buy you dinner, and we can just, you know, talk…”

“Oh” Ann said. “Sure, I guess…”

“Great!” Ryuji said. “Follow me.” Ryuji walked into a beef bowl shop. Ann followed. They took a seat next to each other, and placed their order. While they were waiting, Ryuji turned to Ann and asked “Well, what do you think?”

Ann seemed confused. “It’s a beef bowl place…”

“Huh” Ryuji said.

“What?” Ann asked.

Ryuji thought for a moment. “No, I guess that makes sense.”

“What?!” Ann asked again.

Ryuji sighed. “Nothin’. It's just… I dunno, I thought you’d be a little more excited. But really, you only get that way about desserts.”

“Oh. Yeah” Ann said. There was a bit of silence as their food got delivered. “Thanks,” Ann said, not looking up at who was serving them. They started eating. Ann then stopped and looked at Ryuji. “What’s all this about?”

“Huh?” Ryuji said, looking back at her, food in his mouth. He swallows what he has and answers “I just thought this would be nice. Just the two of us, you know. Plus, I needed my make it up to you for that comment I made last week.”

“I get that…” Ann said.

“So what’s the problem?” Ryuji asked.

Ann stared at him. “I’m just… not sure…”

“‘bout what?” Ryuji asked.

Ann remained silent for a bit. “Well… You’ve been acting a little weird.”

“How so?” Ryuji continued.

Ann looked at him. “You keep saying the right things, but you also say the wrong things. It’s tripping me up.”

“Oh” Ryuji said. “S-sorry…” He looked down.

Ann saw him saddened. “No, it’s fine,” she said. “It’s not really your fault. It’s just who you are.”

Ryuji looked up. “I get it! All I need to do is change myself!”

“NO!” Ann shouted. “No, you’re amazing just the way you are. You don’t need to change. At least not drastically.”

“Oh” Ryuji said.

“It’s just, sometimes, when I want you to be serious, you kind of change the topic, or make a joke” Ann said. “And while that is fine sometimes, I want to know what’s going on in your head, you know? We were inseparable in middle school. But now, it sometimes feels like you don’t want to try and get that back…”

Ryuji looked forlorn at Ann. He took her by the hand. “Hey” he said. “Is this about me deflecting from the painting request from Yusuke?”

“Huh?” Ann said, surprised and blushing.

Ryuji sighed. “It’s just that… things were getting serious. I don’t mind opening up to you because we’ve known each other for so long. But, for a moment, I forgot everyone else was there. And that scared me.” Ann was shocked.

Ryuji continued. “It feels easier to bare my soul like that to people I’ve known for a while, and can trust wholeheartedly. It’s not that I don’t trust everyone, but like… I don’t know. I don’t think they’d do anything to hurt me, but I’ve been burned too many times before to open up to people like that right away.”

Ryuji looked at Ann. “I can do that with you because I’ve known you for a while. And despite everything that happened with Kamoshida, I can still put that trust in you. So, I’m sorry if I’m a little awkward, or a bit hesitant. But I want you to know that the middle school kid you connected with is still there.”

Ann smiled. ���Ryuji…”

“So, should I not be here then?” they heard Ren ask.

Ryuji and Ann were alarmed. They looked up to see that Ren was serving them. “Ren?!” they both shouted in unison.

“Hi” Ren greeted them.

“You’re working here too?!” Ann asked.

Ren nodded. “Though it is a bit demanding.”

“How much did you hear?” Ryuji asked.

“Bits and pieces” Ren answered. “I was busy with the other customers.”

“Oh. I see…” Ryuji said

“But I will say, I totally understand what you said about being burned before,” Ren added, sitting down next to them, setting a beef bowl down in front of her. “It took a lot of courage for me to admit that I was a lesbian to you guys. Too many times, that has been a barrier for people liking me. That, and I guess my general attitude.”

“I see…” Ryuji said.

“So go at your own pace Ryuji,” Ren said. “We’ll understand.” She started eating her beef bowl.

“Woah! Aren’t you on duty?” Ryuji inquired.

“Huh?” Ren said, mouth full of beef. “Nuh-uh.” She finished her mouthful. “I just got done. Someone else just started working.”

“I see…” Ann said.

“Do the two of you wanna be alone right now?” Ren asked. “Cause I could move.”

Ryuji smiled. “It’s fine. I think all of the really embarrassing stuff was said already. Unless you want it to be the two of us Ann?”

Ann shook her head. “It’s fine.”

“Sweet,” Ren said. They finished eating their beef bowls, while also just chatting about different things. After they finished, they paid the other server and got up to go. “You go on ahead,” Ren said. “I gotta get my stuff from the back.”

Ann nodded. “Alright, seeya!”

“And thanks again!” Ryuji added. The two of them left.

Ren waved goodbye to them. She then headed back to pick up her things and go. One of those things grew a little impatient. “What took you so long?” Morgana asked.

Ren answered “Just some friendly conversation.”

Morgana pouted. “I wished I could have joined in.”

Ren smiled. “I’ll get you some tuna once we get out of here to make it up to ya.” Morgana perked up. Ren changed back into her usual clothes and headed out.

The next day, she got a message from Jose.

Jose: Hey.

Jose: I know things have been hectic lately with everything going on with Madarame.

Jose: But I was wondering something.

Jose: Would today be a good day to help me study humans?

Jose: I understand if you want to prioritize Madarame first.

Jose: But I want to get to work as soon as possible.

Ren: It’s fine.

Ren: I can come and help you today.

Jose: Really?

Ren: Yeah.

Ren: If I keep prioritizing Phantom Thief stuff, I’ll get too pressured too fast, and that won’t do anyone any good.

Jose: I see.

Jose: Meet me by Kosei.

Ren: Do you have a plan?

Jose: Sort of.

Ren: Well, I guess I’ll just have to go with it.

Ren: See ya soon.

Jose: See you there.

Ren put her phone in her bag and headed off. She made her way to Kosei and saw Jose standing by the gate. “Hey there Madame!”

Ren was confused. “Madame?”

Jose nodded. “I learned that that is a polite way of greeting someone.”

Ren chuckled. “We’re friends, so you don’t need to do that. You can just call me by my name.”

“Oh. OK. Hey Ren” Jose said.

Ren was still chuckling. “Hey Jose. So, what’s your ‘sort of’ plan?”

“Well,” Jose said, fishing through his pocket, “I have these tickets from the theater department to go see a production they’re putting on. I thought seeing a live performance would help me figure out humans better, but…”

Ren was curious. “But what?”

Jose sighed. “Most people who got them were talking about bringing a date, and I’m not entirely sure what that is. Would we be going on a date if I asked you to come along with me?”

Ren was surprised. She looked at Jose. “Um, before I answer that, how much about humans do you already know?”

Jose looked up. “Well, I know functions,” he explained. “I know how people do things. I’m just not aware of why.”

“I see,” Ren said. “So, do you know what a date actually is?”

“Well, based on what I know, a date is when two people hang out together and do something,” Jose said. “But I’m not entirely sure why…”

Ren smiled. “A date is something that happens between two people who are interested in each other romantically.” Jose was a little surprised. “So, I guess the question is, are you interested in me romantically?”

Jose thought about it. “I’m sort of aware about things like love and romance, but I don’t think I fully understand it.”

Ren chuckled. “Don’t worry. Nobody really does. It’s quite complicated.”

“Well, I know the basic idea of it,” Jose said. “But I don’t think I have those sorts of feelings for anyone.”

“And that’s fine,” Ren said. “You seem a bit young, so you might not have those feelings yet. Or ever. And that’s fine too.”

Jose looked up at her. “But isn’t the usual process of romance to find someone to marry and have children with?”

“Well, that’s certainly a very common end result” Ren answered. “But it doesn’t have to be. We’re Phantom Thieves after all. If we just accepted everything society has given us, we wouldn’t be doing what we’re doing.”

Jose thought about it. “I guess you’re right. Those shadows told me that humans were destined for chaos and despair, while you guys told me that wasn’t true.” Jose nodded. “So, I just have to fight for what I believe in.”

“That’s the spirit!” Ren said.

“So, I’m guessing if you were to come with me, it wouldn’t be a date,” Jose explained. Ren shook her head. “I see. Would people think it was?”

Ren was shocked, but not entirely surprised by the question. “Well, I don’t think so. There’s a very apparent age gap between the two of us.”

“Yeah, but in magazines you see like 50 year old business moguls going out with 20-something models, right?” Jose asked.

Ren was shocked again, and this time she was entirely surprised. “That’s… different…”

“So, it would be a ‘no’ then for people thinking we were dating?” Jose asked. Ren nodded. “Alright. But would you like to go together anyways?”

Ren smiled and said “Sure.”

“Great! It’s the least I could do after borrowing that cloak from them” Jose said. “Follow me.” Jose led Ren into Kosei’s theater, Jose presented the two tickets to the ticket taker and they let him and Ren inside.

The theater department was putting on a production of Cinderella. Ren really enjoyed the play, but couldn’t stop blushing as she remembered the dream she had about Sumire a little while ago. Once they were finished, the entire auditorium gave them a standing ovation. Ren looked at Jose, and she could tell that he did like it, but was confused about this part.

Once they left the theater, Ren turned to Jose and asked “How did you enjoy the play?”

Jose had to think for a moment. “Well, I really liked the story. And I liked the way the performers acted it out. But I’m still wondering something…”

“What is it?” Ren asked.

“Why is it that people tell these stories in the first place?” Jose wondered. “Not just on the stage, but through movies, books, games…”

“Well, you enjoyed it, right?” Ren inquired. Jose Looked at her and nodded. “That’s why.”

Jose was surprised. “So, people do things for their own amusement? I see. To be honest, a lot of other creatures do those kinds of things as well. I just thought that humans might have had a bigger reason.”

“What makes you say that?” Ren asked.

“Well, the person that put me up to studying humans in the first place believes that humanity will serve a greater purpose” Jose told her.

“Huh. Well, that seems like a bit of a tall order…” Ren said, nervously. “But maybe it’s not that humans are inherently better than other species. It’s just that we learned how to use these instincts to make something better.”

“Huh. So, it’s a form of magic” Jose said.

“Well, not in the literal sense” Ren explained. “But if you want to think of it like that, then sure.”

Jose went back to thinking. “I’ve been learning in class as well. Whenever I’m arranging flowers, they all start as individual flowers. But by the end, they become an intricate, delicate art piece that inspires many emotions from it. You’re saying humans are like that?”

“Well, they can be,” Ren said. “Unless they’re like Madarame.”

“Right,” Jose said. He grew determined. “I want to fight for the best of humanity. To see it become more than the sum of its parts.” He faced Ren. “And you’ll be there to help, right?”

Ren giggled. “Of course.”

“Great! I can’t wait to get started!” Jose shouted.

I am thou... Thou art I… Thou hast acquired a new vow...

It shall become the wings of rebellion that breaketh thy chains of captivity.

With the birth of the Aeon Persona I have obtained the winds of blessing that shall lead to freedom and new power

Aeon-Jose: Rank 1

Jose settled down a little. “By the way. That Cinderella character seems a little familiar…”

Ren lightly chuckled. “Another name for Cinderella is Cendrillon.”

“Oh. Like Sumire’s Persona” Jose replied. “That makes sense. She reminded me a lot of Sumire”

“Yeah,” Ren said, blushing, thinking about her dream again.

Jose nodded. “Thanks for coming along.”

“No problem,” Ren said. “Seeya later!” Ren started walking out.

“Bye!” Jose waved back. Ren smiled and left.

Ren took another shift at the beef bowl place later that evening. It was a little busier than yesterday, but Ren managed. Once her shift was over, she again made herself a beef bowl and sat down to begin eating.

“My, they were working you hard tonight” said a friendly voice. Ren turned towards it to find the street orator she had noticed on Central Street from time to time. “Were you the only one working?”

“Uh, yeah” Ren answered. “It’s kind of how they do things around here.”

“Well, they should fix that,” the man said. “A young lady such as yourself shouldn’t have to do all of that by yourself.”

Ren took a bite of her beef bowl. “I can manage,” she told him.

“Ah, my apologies,” the man said. “I didn’t mean to underestimate you. I just think that anyone your age should have better working conditions.”

“I see…” Ren said. She sighed. “I’m sorry.” The man was slightly taken aback. “You were just looking out for me. I’m not great at talking with people I don’t know too well without complicating things for myself…”

The man smiled. “It’s alright. We’re all prone to making mistakes from time to time.”

Ren smiled and looked at him. “You know, I really like your speeches whenever I get the chance to hear them.”

The man rubbed the back of his head. “Why thank you. It’s not every day I get to hear that.” Ren continued eating. “Say, why don’t you come help me out sometime?” Ren looked up. “You’re an earnest girl, and you’re hardworking. Plus, you seem to have a fair amount of confidence in you. I could use someone like that helping me out.”

Ren swallowed another bite. “What’s in it for me?”

“Ah ha ha ha ha ha!” the man laughed. “Well, of course I would compensate you. But you might also learn a thing or two from me.” Ren was curious. “You told me yourself you weren’t great at talking to people you’re unfamiliar with. As a politician, it’s my job to do just that. Maybe by observing, you can learn something.”

Ren smiled. “I’d like that.”

“Well then, it’s a deal” the man said. “If you could just give me your information, I can contact you on nights I need you.”

Ren got out her phone. She began setting up his contact info, when something occurred to her. “Oh yeah. What’s your name?”

“Ah ha ha!” the man laughed again. “I completely forgot about that. My name is Toranosuke Yoshida.”

“Ren Amamiya” she replied.

After they exchanged information, Yoshida looked at her and said “Thank you for the beef bowl, by the way. I look forward to meeting with you.” Ren smiled.

Yoshida took out his wallet and handed her some cash. Ren was confused. “Um, I thought you already paid for your meal.”

“I did,” Yoshida said. “This is for your meal.”

Ren looked at the cash. She looked back at Yoshida. “Thanks.” Yoshida simply nodded and walked out of the restaurant. Ren finished her bowl, paid, and headed back to get her things. Once she had everything, she headed back to Leblanc for the night.

[serendipityjxmn]

I Hate You, Park Jimin!

Chapter 16

Words Count: 2.7k

TW: Brief smut moments!

Link to Chapter 15

Link to Chapter 17

The sun had rose so high that Saturday afternoon it’s getting slightly warm although it was Fall. I sank on the floor in the living room, feeling exhausted and slowly wiped the sweat beading on my forehead with the back of my hand. I had been busy doing house chores since early morning and I thought my morning had been pretty productive. I did my laundry, even threw in my bed sheets and stuffs, swept and mopped the floors, dusted the few furnitures I have and even made breakfast for myself this morning.

I frowned when my thoughts suddenly went to Jungkook. I hadn’t seen him at all for the rest of the week except our short encounter at the locker last Tuesday. He told me he’d meet me later at the cafe that day but turned out he didn’t show up at all that day. And the next day. And the next day as well. He didn’t come up for work at all for the rest of the week. I asked Kyung Hee eonnie and she said that he’d been taking leaves due to personal family matters. This worried me a lot and had been a source for Jimin’s grumpiness this week.

I glanced at my phone. Now that he appeared in my mind... I miss.. Jimin. He hadn’t texted me at all yet today. He usually sent me a good morning text though. Perhaps he was busy today. I pouted slightly.

And I had no idea how Yoo Nara’s name suddenly popped in my mind. She had been acting weird lately and I had no idea how to react to that. She had been civilised earlier during our first meets and ever since the incident of her bumping into my shoulder, she had been shooting glares and scowling at me during the few moments where we had unfortunately locked eye with. I suspected it had much to do with my relationship with Jimin.

Yesterday however, I had bumped into her when I was heading for the restroom. She was already inside, washing her hand when I entered. She looked up at me and her expression immediately turned nasty. Almost instantly though, she changed her expression to smirking. She shook her head as she exited the toilet with a sinister smile plastered on her lips.

Honestly, it had me weirded out. I sighed and decided to pull my thoughts away from depressing things or people.

I spent the rest of the day studying some chapters for a few hours before settling myself on the couch and flipping through Netflix channels. The night had just settled in when my phone buzzed. I glanced and felt my heart leapt from excitement when I saw Jimin’s name on the screen. God, the simple thing he does that makes me feel all butterflies.

Jimin: Have you had dinner?

I was already halfway sprinting to my bedroom to change my shirt.. just in case.

Kim Hana: No.

Jimin: Be at your place in half an hour.

I replied almost instantly.

Kim Hana: OK.

I squealed in excitement as I roughly pulled my wardrobe door open. I changed into a simple blue short pants and an oversized white T-shirt. I brushed my hair and even put on some lipstick. Jeez- Hana. Calm down girl.

The door rang half an hour later. I opened the door and immediately my mouth went dry at the sight of Park Jimin. He was wearing black turtleneck with leather jacket on top as well as ripped jeans. He looked... delicious.

“Hey.” He smiled his megawatt smile and I felt the rapid beating of my heart immediately.

“Hey.” I replied and stepped away to let him in when I noticed he bought food for me.

“Thought we could have dinner together?“ he said as he placed the plastic bags on the kitchen table.

“That would be perfect.” I said and he grinned at me. He turned around to shrug his jacket off his shoulder and placed it on the chair before turning around towards the sink to wash his hand. I had no idea what washed o ver me that I took a few steps towards him and hugged him from behind.

He stiffened for a few seconds perhaps due to shock because this was definitely not something I did to him a thousand times but immediately relaxed when I buried my cheeks against his back while my hands lay flat on his chest.

“Miss me that much?”

I only hummed in response and he chuckled. He clasped his hands around mine and gave me a tight squeeze before I realized what I was doing. Oh God- am I Kim Hana? I gasped and immediately dropped my hands. He smiled in amusement when he turned around to see my red face. I looked down.

“You’re so cute when you’re shy.” He said as he stepped towards me and I instinctively took a step backward. “Don’t be shy though, I like you jumping on me.”

I flushed crimson. I was about to head back towards the kitchen table when he blocked my path and stepped even further till I had my back against the countertop, caging me. He had both his hands beside me and I gulped from the close proximity. Sure, we’ve been.. intimate but I was still shy and everything was still new to me. And of course, it does not help that Jimin’s so ridiculously good looking he made me catch my breath all the time.

He didn’t say anything and just leaned forward until I felt his lips against mine. I immediately drowned in his kisses, soft and moist, with only slight urgency. I felt his hands went to my waist and I whimpered at his touch.

He groaned and suddenly the pace of his kiss escalated. He kissed me deeply and my breath grew shorter as I gasped for air in between kisses. His hands moved towards the small of my back as he pressed himself towards me. I moaned when I felt his crotch, hard against mine.

He then moved his lips to my neck and I shivered when he bit it lightly.

“Jimin-“ I was already a hot mess.

“Hmm?” He hummed, his voice low as he continued to place wet kisses on the crook of my neck. I gasped from the sensation. Oh God- are we gonna have sex in my kitchen?

“Jimin-“ I called him again as my hands went to lay flat against his chest. “The food will get cold,” I said as I pushed him slightly.

He lips stopped attacking me and he regarded me for a moment. He smirked when he saw the mess that I was in. “Okay.” He said and pushed himself off me. I let out a huge breath I didn’t know I was holding. I cleared my throat.

Then suddenly, without warning Jimin leaned in to plant a soft kiss on my lips. “I missed you too,” he whispered and I froze. My heart couldn’t possibly beat any faster than it did right now. My legs were slowly turning jelly. Jimin and the power he had on me and he wouldn’t know for the world.

“I’m sorry. I just can’t resist kissing you. It doesn’t help that you have the most adorable reaction either.”

I flushed further. I cleared my throat again and pushed him slightly to head towards the kitchen table while he chuckled behind me.

“So, how’s your day?” He asked me as he gently took the hair that fell down on my face and pulled it all behind. I melted at his thoughtfullness.

“Productive. I did house chores, mostly.” I smiled at him as I unpacked the food.

“But your house is sparkly clean all the time anyway.”

“Because I clean.” I retorted.

“Well then maybe- I should go and lie down on your freshly washed linens.. in the bedroom..” he said, voice low and seductive near my ear. “Care to join?”

I stilled. God- he’s so flirty I sometimes had no idea how to react other than freezing. I smacked his arms. “Pervert.”

He laughed and I swear it’s the most wonderful sound ever.

“What about you? What did you do today?”

He didn’t answer immediately so I looked up and saw him frowning.

“Jimin?”

“Huh?” He looked up as if from a daze, eyes finally meeting mine.

“What did you do today?”

His brows furrowed further. “Um- nothing.” I frowned at him and he knew I was dissatisfied with his answer so he quickly said, “Nothing really. I woke up noon, watch tv, and nap again and here I am.” He said and before I could say anything, he already made his way towards the living room, carrying the food.

I was still frowning as I followed after him and sat on the floor beside him. He was already flicking through the channels of Netflix.

Was he hiding something? I thought. Then I shook my head. Maybe he didn’t want to share or talk about it and I shouldn’t pry about it unless he wants to talk about it. So I didn’t press him further.

“What’s your favourite food?” He suddenly asked. He had finally settled on letting Good Doctor series playing on tv but he toned down the volume a lot the show was almost mere flashes of pictures.

I smiled at him as I took my first sip of the beef braised soup. Ummpph- this is heaven. “What’s so sudden?”

He shrugged. “I just realized I didn’t know your favourite when I wanted to buy food just now.”

“Actually, this.” I jutted my chin low slightly towards my soup of braised beef.

His eyes lit up. “Really? I made a good choice then.”

I nodded. “And this is really good. What about you then?”

He didn’t answer immediately as his brows knitted, thinking. “Hmm.. I don’t think I really have one. I eat everything.”

I just nodded at that. Food are something easy to fix for guys.

“What’s your favourite color?”

Hmm this is easy. “Blue.”

“Me too.”

Oh? That’s cute. I sipped my soup. “So how long have you known your annoyingly handsome group of troublemakers?”

He raised one of his eyebrows, his expression bemused. “Annoyingly handsome group of troublemakers?”

“That’s what Ah Young usually says.”

He smiled fondly before answering. “Ever since I was a kid, I guess. For Taehyung’s case,” he added. “We’re family friends. His father knows my father.. my mother knows his mother.. you know how it is.”

I simply nodded. How the rich world works- it will always be a wonder for me.

“And then Taehyung met Hoseok hyung back during Second Grade.. And he was already close with the rest at the time. And then he introduced me to all of them.”

“Taehyung’s really friendly.”

He shrugged. “I guess so. If it wasn’t for him, I might have no friends at all.”

I raised a brow at him. “Why would you say that? I told you everyone likes you.” Seriously, Jimin and his lack of self confidence. Jeez- who would have thought. The way he sauntered at college.. one would think he’s the cockiest jerk alive.

“It’s just the face.” He scoffed but when I I opened my mouth to rebutt, he suddenly chuckled.

I frowned. What’s he laughing at? “Something funny?”

“Just thinking that.. we’re kinda doing things backward. You know.. sex before getting to know each other’s trivia.” He smirked at me.

I reddened at this. How could he say the word with such ease?

“Do you have any sex kink?” He asked suddenly and I choked on my soup.

He laughed at me while I frantically clutched my chest.

“Can you not say those things so easily?” I glowered at him.

“What? I’m your boyfriend. I need to know what you like or you might think of running away.” He was done eating and now had his hand propped under his chin, his expression amused.

“It’s not like I’m dating you for s-“ My eyes widened, my hands flew to clamp my mouth immediately, realizing the word I was about to say. Jimin’s shoulder vibrated as he tried to contain his laugh. Jeez- he loves teasing me so much! I gulped. “S-something physical.” I managed to finish. ”You could be the worse in bed and I would still like you.”

“Really?” He asked, one of his eyebrows arched at me. “So you don’t like me only for the sex.. or my body?”

I gulped slightly but then shook my head. Does he really need all these assurances?

“At all?”

Jeez. He’s infuriating. “Yeap.”

“Huh,” he huffed. “So you like me huh?”

“Yeap.” I blurted out.

“Since when?”

“Since-“ my eyes widened. “No, no I’m- it’s um- it’s a slip of a tongue I don’t like you,” my eyes blew further, “I mean, I don’t hate you like, maybe I like you a bit-“ I was ranting by now.

And suddenly my words were sealed when Jimin crashed his lips against mine, surpressing all of my words. Damn Jimin and his way of silencing me!

I was lost in his kiss almost immediately.

He deepened the kiss, his tongue hot and hard exploring my mouth and I squirmed when I felt his hands went towards my thigh. He moved forward and leaned closer and my back was pressed against the sofa feet, his hands on either side of me.

I could hear his breathings getting heavier and I was pretty sure mine was too.

“Jimin-“ I moaned when his lips went to suck my neck. Fuck- my head lolled to the back and Jimin seemed appreciative with the access and he wasted no time attacking me with wet kisses and I moaned louder. God- I could already feel the wetness pooling down there. His hands that was once on my thigh already went up higher towards my waist, my stomach and now they were tracing the line of my breasts over my shirt.

“Shit- ah Jimin-“ I whimpered when I felt his crotch dangerously close to mine. I was about to push him aside so I can sit astride him when he suddenly pulled away from me.

I opened my eyes and saw him sitting casually beside me, smiling bemusedly at me.

“So tomorrow- at my place.”

Huh- what? “What?” I asked, almost inaudible as I struggled to catch my breath. Damn it- I was in such a mess, panting heavily, cheeks flushed and fucking hardened nipples but he seemed so at ease as if we didn’t just had a hot make out session. I glanced down at him - nope, he was affected - confirmed as I saw the growing bulge beneath his pants.

He seemed to notice where my gaze landed at and cleared his throat. “Our study session.”

Oh. I flushed even further, biting my cheeks. Maybe I can try to turn it into something else.. or plan a revenge seeing how he made me feel bereft tonight.

“Oh and anyway, you’re going to meet my, as you said annoyingly handsome group of troublemakers tomorrow.”

I- what?! “Me?” I almost yelled at him. “I mean- what- why?”

He chuckled at my reaction. “Because they haven’t stopped pestering me about meeting you, saying things like.. hiding sister in law.” He smirked and playfully grazed my chin.

I went pale. I wasn’t ready. I so wasn’t ready to meet his bunch of annoyingly good looking group.

“I’ll pick you up tomorrow okay.” He said and then stood up.

In a daze- still trying to wrap my mind about meeting his friends tomorrow- I staggered as I tried to stand. He caught my waist immediately. A fond smile plastered on his face.

“I wouldn’t sweat about it. They’ll love you.” He placed his fingers on my chin, trying to make me look at him.

“Or more like you’ll break their neck if they don’t.”

He laughed. “That may be right too.”

I smacked his arms then proceeded to wrap my arms around him too as we made our way to the door.

“I’m going now. Good night and dream of me.” He planted a soft kiss on my head and left just like that.

Leaving me horny.

Fuck.

Link to Chapter 17

200830 9:00PM

[mememanufactorum]

Halo 2 quote starters

* FEEL FREE TO SHARE AS YOU PLEASE, NO CREDIT NEEDED. CHANGE PRONOUNS OR ANYTHING ELSE AS DESIRED.

-The Heretic-

“This has gone on long enough. Make an example of this bungler.”

“The weight of your heresy will stay your feet, and you shall be left behind.”

“You know how expensive this gear is?”

-The Armory-

“Hey, take it easy!”

“Careful, you’ll pull a tendon doing that!”

“Fine, but don’t come cryin’ to me when you rip your leg out of its socket.”

“This is important. You should at least look at me when I’m explaining it.”

“Look, just ‘cause the brass kisses your ass don’t mean I will.”

“Look at me when I talk to you.”

“Are you listenin’ to me?”

“Would it help if I said please?”

“When are you gonna tell me how you made it back home in one piece?”

“Well, he’s in a particularly fine mood.”

“Nobody’s sayin’ much, but I think something big’s about to happen.”

-Cairo Station-

“You told me there wouldn’t be any cameras.”

“You told me you were gonna wear something nice.”

“Folks need heroes, to give ‘em hope. So, smile, would ya? While we still got something to smile about.”

“You’ve drawn quite a crowd.”

“If they came to hear me beg, they will be disappointed.”

“We’re lucky to have you back.”

“I’m sorry, but we’re gonna have to make this quick.”

“You look nice.”

“I need a weapon.”

“Check your targets and watch the crossfire.”

“They’re in standard formation: Little bastards up front, big ones in back.”

“As soon as that door opens, let ‘em have it!”

“I don’t believe it! They’re retreating! We won!”

“This is bad! Real bad!”

“Just a friendly reminder: Bomb.”

“If this thing goes off, I am NEVER talking to you again.”

“Tell your friends I got enough ammo for all of ya!”

“Come on, is that a weapon or a flashlight?”

“How much time was left?”

“You don’t want to know.”

“I know what you’re thinking, and it’s crazy.”

“So, stay here.”

“Unfortunately for us both, I like crazy.”

“Just one question… What if you miss?”

“For a brick, he flew pretty good!”

-Outskirts-

“Any idea what it means?”

“Hey. Wake up.”

“Talk to me. Should I start CPR? What’s going on?”

“Blink if you can hear me.”

“If they didn’t know we’re here before, they do now!”

“Oh man, I love the beach.”

“I hope you packed a suit.”

“I don’t think they expected us to be here.”

-Metropolis-

“It blew right through us!”

“You had your chance to be afraid before you joined my beloved Corps. But to guide you back to the true path, I have brought this motivational device.”

“When I joined the Corps, we didn’t have any fancy-schmancy tanks! We had sticks! Two sticks and a rock! And we had to share the rock!”

“Usually the good Lord works in mysterious ways. But not today!”

“If God is Love, then you can call me Cupid!”

“They’re tough, but they ain’t invincible.”

“He never gets me anything.”

“Oh, I know what the ladies like.”

“That’s quite a welcome party.”

“Who’s in charge now?”

“See this look?! It’s terror!”

“Did I give you permission to bitch?!”

“I don’t think it’s stopping, get your heads down!”

“That thing is really starting to PISS ME OFF!”

“It can’t go any further this way. We have it trapped.”

“That’s right, you mothers! Run!”

-The Arbiter-

“How much further must we heft this baggage? Any cell will do.”

“Why not toss him in with this lot? They could use the meat.”

“Ultimately, the terms of your execution are up to me.”

“I am already dead.”

“Do you know where we are?”

“Even on my knees, I do not belong in their presence.”

“They would use the faith of our forefathers to bring ruin to us all!”

“What use am I?”

“That armor suits you, but it cannot hide that mark.”

“Their lives matter to me. Yours does not.”

“Warriors, prepare for combat!”

“Be silent and swift, and we shall quell this heresy without incident.”

“We have the element of surprise… For now.”

“That was the last of them – but there are more ahead.”

-The Oracle-

“That stench… I’ve smelled it before.”

“Close your jaw or I shall bind it shut!”

“Come out so we may kill you.”

“We should have brought weapons to burn these bodies.”

“We’ll never break through this!”

“May our Lords guide you.”

“We shall not forget your sacrifice.”

“Keep your blade handy.”

“Take my blade.”

“Turn, heretic.”

“Who has taught you these lies?”

“More questions? Splendid! I would be happy to assist you.”

“Unfortunate. His edification was most enjoyable.”

“Why do you meddlers insist on using such inaccurate verbiage?”

-Delta Halo-

“I don’t care if I have the clearance or not.”

“Where’s our target?”

“Until I can move and fight, I’m going to keep a low profile.”

“Hang onto your helmet!”

“Mind the bump.”

“Could we possibly make any more noise?! ...I guess so.”

“If I were a megalomaniac – and I’m not – that’s where I’d be.”

“I heard that, jackass!”

“Transcendence, huh? More like mass suicide.”

“You always bring me to such nice places.”

“They don’t seem to consider us a very serious threat. Boy, are they in for a big surprise.”

-Regret-

“Wait, go back!”

“I’d need to make a thorough survey to be sure.”

“I wish I had more time to decipher these inscriptions.”

“Well, they were nice enough to bring us a ride.”

“Sorry, were you trying to kill something?”

“And people say I’ve got a big head.”

“Oh man, he’s SO dead.”

“Oh, great! We’re gonna ride another one of these death traps!”

“Man, look at the size of that thing!”

“Guards! Remove this vermin from my sight!”

“You dare to interrupt my sermon?!”

“Surely you can do better than that?”

“Perhaps you underestimated me, no?”

“This is not your grave… But you are welcome in it.”

-Sacred Icon-

“This is unprecedented… Unacceptable!”

“Are you questioning my decision?”

“Politics… How tiresome.”

“We have always been your protectors.”

“These are trying times for all of us.”

“Why? Looking for a little payback?”

“Let’s see if you fare better.”

“Stay in the shadows, wait until it loses interest, then strike the beast when its back is turned.”

“We must hold this camp until reinforcements arrive.”

-Quarantine Zone-

“I hope you know what you’re doing.”

“Forward, warriors, and fear not pain nor death!”

“No matter, they will die all the same.”

“Steel your nerves, we’re not turning back.”

“I grow restless without a target.”

“Ignore the braggart. Ready yourselves.”

“That fool! He’ll alert them to our presence!”

“Look on the bright side, if we’re lucky, they’ll shoot him down.”

“You know, your father never asked me for help either.”

“We got trouble.”

“How you doin’?”

“A bloody fate awaits you and the rest of your incompetent race.”

-Gravemind-

“What… Is that?”

“I am a monument to all your sins.”

“Relax. I’d rather not piss this thing off.”

“Kill me or release me. But do not waste my time with talk!”

“There is much talk, and I have listened through rock and metal and time. Now I shall talk, and you shall listen.”

“We have much to do!”

“You know nothing about containment! You have demonstrated a complete disregard for even the most basic of protocols!”

“If you will not hear the truth, then I shall show it to you.”

“They’re beefing up their patrols. Stay sharp.”

“The path is broad, and we shall walk it side by side.”

“Be glad! A reward for all your toil and all your sacrifices in the year at hand.”

“There are those who said this day would never come. What have they to say now?”

“Look on the bright side: For now, they seem much more interested in killing each other.”

-Uprising-

“Let’s just throw them over the edge.”

“Where’s the fun in that?”

“So, you’ve come to save your friends!”

“They have shed our brothers’ blood… And for that, they must die.”

“So much for a stealthy advance.”

“Bah! Over so soon?”

“Long have I waited for this!”

“...And yet I live.”

“What vulgar taste. Even as trophies, these weapons are useless.”

-High Charity-

“Your pal. Where’s he going?”

“Not a very original plan, but we know it’ll work.”

“No enemy has ever withstood our might.”

“Arrogant creature. Your death will be instantaneous, while we shall suffer the progress of infinitude!”

“We exist together now… Two corpses in one grave.”

“This crisis will not be the end of us.”

“If you will falter, know this… One final effort is all that remains.”

“I can’t go with you.”

“Don’t make a girl a promise… If you know you can’t keep it.”

-The Great Journey-

“I know a way to break those doors.”

“A day’s rations says I can do this in one cut.”

“You don’t like me, and I sure as hell don’t like you.”

“I just happen to have a key.”

“Hey, bastards! Knock knock!”

“Ha, ha, that’s real funny. I’m still shootin’.”

“What, do I have to spell it out for you? MOVE!”

“Are you trying to get killed? Gimmie some room!”

“Not another word!”

“If you want to keep your brain inside your head, I’ll tell your boys to chill.”

“Go ahead, do your thing.”

“You want revenge? Well, here I am. Come and take it.”

“Just like the rest of your race, cowardly and weak.”

“A lucky hit. You shall not land another.”

“Silence fills the empty grave now that I have gone.”

“My mind is not at rest, for questions linger on. I will ask, and you will answer.”

[rayshippouuchiha]

I came out of Endgame with tears in my eyes and my heart filled up to the brim with absolute seething rage.

Even as I write this now my hands shake with some sick mixture of sadness, rage, and bitter disappointment.

So I preface this by saying that I am emotionally compromised and some of my views might shift with time and distance.

But, for better or for worse, this is my first rage flushed take:

I am so disappointed and so angry that after all of the tension, all of the build, all of the time and sweat and tears, all of the loyalty, we were rewarded with this.

Endgame had its high points, I’m not saying that it didn’t.  There were some genuinely funny moments and some heart rending ones as well.

Every single second Tony Stark was on screen was flawless as always.  Robert Downey Jr. once again proved why he and he alone was suited for the role of Tony Stark and the task of carrying the majority of the MCU for the past 10+ years.

That’s not to say that the rest of the cast wasn’t good.  All of the actors all obviously brought their A game and then some when they were allowed to by what I loosely call a script.

So yeah, there were some highs.

But when its comes to Endgame’s low points?

Its low points were subterranean.

They lowered the bar and then they dug underneath it.

Again I’m writing this basically fresh from the theater and with my emotions still high so do forgive me if this is a bit jumbled around or if I ramble a bit as I cover some of the real issues I had with the film.

So, first thing to address was the overall tone of the film.

For this to be the much glorified Endgame, the “battle of our lives”, there was, in my opinion, a distinct lack of true tension in this film.  Instead of a fraught, nail biting, tension filled ride, Endgame is more of a ... brisk jog through some vaguely sticky situations.

Instead of playing the story straight and giving the situation the gravity it deserved, the narrative went out of its way to put humor that served no other purpose than to ruin what tension had been previously built.  And, in my opinion, the tone of the film suffered for it.

The humor and jokes were humorous, I’m not saying they wasn’t.  I genuinely laughed out loud in the moment.  But I also feel that, with the majority of the comedy that was wedged into the narrative, the film suffered for it.

Now let’s move on a bit to the actual plot of the film.  Again, forgive me if I bounce a bit:

Jeremy Renner was breathtakingly heartbreaking as Clint Barton.  Renner was finally allowed to stretch his legs a bit in this film and he proved that, had he been given the chance, he would have given us a Clint Barton to take our breath away.

Watching with Clint as his family died helped to set what should have been the tone for the majority of the film from there on while reminding us of just what was lost and just what was at stake all at the same time.

Chris Evans brought heart to his portrayal of a Steve Rogers who seems both lighter and more weighted down in this film than ever before.

Scarlett Johansson’s Natasha finally showed more emotion than “head tilt”, “lip purse”, and “arched brow” and it was beautiful.

The brief flash of friendship and affection between Nebula and Tony was perfect and heartwarming as well.  Nebula was magnificent as the “feral space cat desperately in need of softness and a friendly hand” when placed side by side with a slowly withering Tony Stark who is, even at his lowest moments, still kind to this alien cyborg he doesn’t know but to who he owes his life.  They flowed together with an onscreen chemistry in their few moments side by side that felt organic and aching.

Together Tony and Nebula embodied a truly important life/plot point of “meet kindness with kindness and kindness will be your reward”.

Moving forward in time hearing Tony vent his anger and his pain and his distrust at Steve was cathartic in a lot of ways.

As was watching Tony rip the arc reactor from his chest and slap it into Steve’s hand.

In this moment Tony is handing Steve his metaphorical broken heart and leaving someone else to, for once, try and pick up the pieces.

But then, unfortunately, things go rather steeply down hill from there.

With Tony out for the count in a hospital bed the others hunt down and execute Thanos with basically a hand wave and all hope for the stones is lost.

Until deus ex rat-ina unleashes Scott Lang from the quantum realm and the logic of the film takes a sharp left turn.

Scott Lang was missing for 5 years.

To him it was 5 hours.

To which I say, why did Janet van Dyne, age during her stay in the quantum realm?  If, according to the MCU canon, every year in our world was roughly only an hour for Scott Lang, then why didn’t Janet come out of the quantum realm only 30 hours older instead of 30 years?

I feel like the answer is probably “because” but yeah maybe I’m just fuzzy on my Ant Man so if I’m wrong then just ignore that bit please.

Also, just a side note, I adore how it’s been 5 years, Wakanda is very much an ally and still up and running, and yet Rhodey still don’t have working legs.  But alas, racism.

Moving on. 

So with the main villain dead and Tony Stark having solved time travel in his living room, because I stan legends only, we’re now subjected, and that is the very word I’d use to describe what happens next, to what is called a Time Heist.

Cute.

Also Bruce Banner and Hulk have now merged Steven Universe style despite Hulk being scared green-less 5 years ago.  But that’s all good, Bruce smoked a ton of weed, they meditated, went on a cleanse or whatever.

Either way Bruce finally did that character development that everyone had been shouting at him since Avengers 2012 and accepted Hulk as part of him and they’re now Dr. Hulk which was … something that happened?

A thing that they chose to do.  The direction in which they set their narrative wheels and then powered full steam ahead and plowed us right over in the process.

But yeah, Time Heist!  That’s the way to go, the only way apparently.

Because going back in time to stop the Snappening isn’t an option due to reasons that are explained and still look and feel paper thin but probably just honestly boils down to “Russos”

Our intrepid heroes will now split up and surf through time Bill and Ted style to collect the Stones from different points in history.

Yay.

So the rest of the film is basically that, a big old jewel hunt through space and history where the Russos attempt to fool us into thinking their plot points are cohesive and cool by donkey punching us repeatedly in our nostalgia-sacks.

We’re treated to, in no particular order, such hits as:

“Ah 2012 and the invasion of New York only not as interesting but Tony Stark is very much an ass man, but then we been done known that.”

“The Ancient One and her still very distracting skull vein coming at you right now”

“LOKI YOU LITTLE SHIT”

“The one time I envied Scott Lang because, for a split second, he got to be inside Tony Stark”

“Let’s watch Tony Stark simultaneous take a Hulk to the face and have a small cardiac event all at the same time but from different angles”

And let us not forget

“Tee Hee Hee us white bois just had to find a way to make sure Captain America say “Hail HYDRA” but it was for “spy reasons” so weren’t we clever???????”

Yeah boys, great job.

So edgy.

(Although as a side note I do agree, Steve Roger’s ass really is America’s ass and I’d like to thank him for that. Personally.)

But then, of course, Endgame would not have been complete without:

“Steve Rogers stares longingly and creepily at Peggy Carter from behind a window, further backing up his one defining character trait in the MCU which is the inability to move on.  Also she doesn’t look up at all despite being a trained spy and all around badass who probably should have noticed the 6 foot slab of American Beef staring at her from less than a foot away, dark room or no dark room.”

And then my personal favorite:

“Tony Stark sees Howard Stark, the father he described as “calculating, cold, he never told me he was proud of me, never even told me he loved me” but it’s all good cause Tony’s a dad now so looking back all he sees are the good times with his emotionally neglectful and abusive father who says there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for his unborn kid and now they awkwardly hug while I try not to scream “FOOTAGE NOT FUCKING FOUND HOWARD AND NO THAT ONE 3 MINUTE VIDEO DOESN’T COUNT YOU SHIT” at the screen and explode in pure rage.”

Joy.

Truly a scene that was necessary and fit the narrative of Howard Stark’s personality and was needed for Tony to uh get closure or grow as a man and a father or something …

It totally wasn’t yet another excuse to give a canonically abusive father screen time in a way that seems genial and sweet in an attempt to give them a bit of redemption that they neither earned nor deserve.

But yeah, whatever, moving on.

Also Rhodey remains an absolute gem and he and Nebula get shit done.

Only oops, not so fast.

Because apparently the only one who is going to run into the whole “two of you can’t exist in one place at one time without consequences” rule is Nebula who, despite her bitchin orange stripe/badge of character development, managed to like synch up with her past self?

Because she didn’t turn her bluetooth/quantum entanglement function off I guess.

Either way Orange Stripe Nebula, O’Snebula as I call her, has accidentally air dropped all her files into OG Nebula’s mental iPhone.

So yeah now big old Past Grimace knows what’s up.

Ooops??

So shit goes down and then Past Grimace is like “you need to Trogan horse this shit, least favorite daughter” so OG Nebula does because “daddy issues”.

Dr. Hulk puts on the gauntlet and Kentucky fires his arm bringing all the people lost in the Snappening back to life now, 5 years after they got dusted.

Which is … honestly a recipe for disaster in so many ways.  What about the people, like the guy in Steve’s support group, who have started to move on?

What about the people who have remarried, have built new lives?

All of that’s ruined now.

It’s fantastic all those people are alive again but jobs, housing, food, healthcare, government, all of it is back in massive disarray across the universe.

And bringing those people back does nothing to bring back the people who didn’t die in the Snappening but died from causality instead.  All the deaths caused by suicides, by car/bus/train/plane/ship/etc crashes, by a lack of first responders, by the civil/world/interplanetary wars that probably raged across the universe due to entire governments disappearing?

All of those people are still dead.

The Snappening killed half of all life in the universe.  Causality probably killed another good ¼ after that.

And Dr. Hulk’s Un-Snappening saves none of them.

This isn’t a true solution, it’s a shitty band-aid.

But yeah, Russos so….

Moving on.

Yadda Yadda Yadda, plot plot plot. OG Nebula goes undercover, Past Grimace ends up in the future, there’s some fighting (which was admittedly BAD ASS), shit happens, and Tony saves the day like we all knew he would.

YAY!

Despite the massive rambling up above I’m not gonna plot out the entire movie right here though a lot will probably get covered coming up because here’s where I get down and start talking about the various character arcs too.

Because what a wild fucking ride those were.

Okay to take it from the top Scott Lang’s arc was fine.  Beyond my questions about the quantum realm his was clear cut and fine although I do wonder at his luck at being, apparently, the only Scott Lang in San Fran to go missing.  Well either that or he was staring at some other Scott Lang’s name instead of his own and in that case “awkward”.

Bruce’s arc was … look I could have done without all of the cringy Dr. Hulk stuff that they played up for laughs.  If they were gonna brush Hulk being terrified under the rug they could have found a better way to do it besides just erasing the duality between Hulk and Banner with a hand wave.

But yeah, Russos.

Carol Danvers was beautiful and magnificent and completely brushed aside.  Yes she was out in the universe handling shit, yes I know they did that so they could focus on the core Avengers, etc etc etc.

But it’s a damn shame that Carol Danvers, and her glorious haircut, was reduced to being the sorely needed and totally badass cavalry and last minute ace in the hole when she should have, logically, been a part of the vanguard.  Honestly I have thoughts on why Carol’s entire character should have been saved completely for the next phase of the MCU instead of introduced so late in this one but I digress.

O’Snebula was a perfect shining bionic light and I love her.

Gamora is now alive in the future but at what cost?  Not that her life isn’t worth something on its own, it totally is and she deserved the loophole resurrection 10000%.

Shit’s gonna be awkward though cause she doesn’t love Quill, she doesn’t love the Guardians, doesn’t really know O’Snebula or the universe she’s been thrown into.  She doesn’t have the memories or the experiences or the character growth and even if she does go back to her family she’ll never be the same person.

Now her and Quill’s relationship, if they ever have one again, will be reduced down to Quill going “you fell in love with me once you could do it again despite us no longer having the shared experiences that bonded us together”.  Same can be said for the rest of the Guardians as well.

Guess we all know what the plot of GotG 3 is gonna be about.

And that brings us to the story lines that really and truly upset me.

Which is basically all the rest of them.

Natasha/Clint’s combined story-line, Thor’s everything, Steve’s … Steve, and then finally Tony.

Now the Natasha/Clint story-line started out promising.

Clint’s rage and pain was obvious, his heartbreak poignant.  His decision to use all of those to cut a bloody swathe through the criminal underworld was both Dramatic(™) and understandable.

Natasha’s love and grief for him, her desperate attempts to hold onto what she has left by throwing herself into her new job, was a perfect demonstration that Natasha Romanoff is very much not a robot.  She was exhausted, frayed at the edges, and she had tears in her eyes, over Clint.  And then she pulled herself together, slipped her mask back on, and pushed her way forward.  This was all excellent.

It was also a nice narrative callback/parallel to have Natasha be the one to go out and bring Clint in from the cold.

Natasha plays touch stone, plays stability, for Clint and for many of the others.  For the first time Natasha is truly portrayed as a person all the way down to the core instead of some witty quips in a catsuit.  Plus her eyebrows finally came back from the war and her hair looked good again.  So there was that.

Clint and Natasha’s arc comes to a climax on Vormir as they search for the Soul Stone and Red Skull, the Nazi cockroach that he is, gives them the same spiel he gave Thanos.

To get the Soul Stone you must give up the life of the one you love the most. A soul for a soul.

Narrative wise this is consistent, we all knew this would happen as soon as they started searching for the Stones again.  It was obvious.

It was also obvious that Clint was the perfect sacrifice.

He’s got nothing left, his family is dead, he’s already lost the people he loves the most, he’s spent five years being a borderline monster.

And he is also, without a doubt, the thing that Natasha loves the most.

Clint was ready and willing to go, ready to die for the blood on his hands, ready to sacrifice himself for the chance that his family would be saved.

Ready to lay down on the wire and let Natasha walk over him for the sake of everything.

Clint dying made sense, was narratively sound, and heartbreaking.

All of which are only a few of the reasons why Natasha’s death was such a goddamn betrayal.

Instead of following along with the narratively sound death of Clint Barton, an Avenger that’s been ignored for most of the films as is, the Russo brothers instead chose to fridge Natasha.

Clint dying would have been the perfect mirror to Gamora’s death.

Gamora was a daughter unwillingly sacrificed by her father to destroy half of all life in the universe.

Clint would have been a father willingly sacrificed by a friend to save half of all life in the universe, his own sons and daughter included.

But no, we didn’t get that, instead we got a gratuitous scene of Natasha Romanoff, the Black Widow, splayed angel like and bloody on the rocks below.

Instead they fridged the Black Widow, the only woman of the original Big Six, because they couldn’t bring themselves to fridge a man.

So Clint gets the Soul Stone.

Such a fitting end for the Black Widow right?  Dying in a man’s place, mourned on screen by a circle of men, but ultimately set aside rather quickly.

I understand why Natasha wanted to be the one to go, I understand that she didn’t want Clint’s family to lose their husband/father and that her true family was the Avengers. I get that.  It doesn’t mean I enjoy or agree with the decision they made any more.

It doesn’t make me any less tired of watching female characters die for the sake of men and their families.

Natasha Romanoff sacrificed herself for the universe and her family and that deserves respect even if I absolutely hate it as a narrative choice.

Oh and what about the absolute NERVE of the Russos to have that awesome Lady Power Battle Strut happen but only after they killed Natasha, one of the Big Six?

Bitter? Me? Nooo.

Now, moving on to Thor.

Thor.

Oh my actual God, Thor.

The levels of disrespect Thor, Chris Hemsworth, and the fans were shown with this character arc/story-line in Endgame is breathtaking.

The absolute, shameless disrespect.

They turned Thor into a cowardly, drunken slob who has spent the last 5 years ignoring his responsibilities to what’s left of his people and instead has spent his time drinking, sulking, and literally yelling at kids over PSN??

Endgame’s Thor has the bullshit reasoning that he needs to stop trying to be who he thinks he should be and instead be who he is.

Which flies completely in the face of literally all of his character development from Thor all the way to Thor 3 and then Infinity War.

The entirety of Thor 3 was Thor’s hero’s journey culminating in him finally being the king he was always meant to be.  Finally maturing and stepping forward to lead his people.

I am supposed to believe that Thor, depressed and guilty or not for not killing Thanos when he had the chance the first time, just abandoned his people like that?

I’m supposed to believe that Thor would piss all over everything the majority of his family and friends died for?

I’m supposed to believe that Heimdall, Loki, countless soldiers, and The Warrior’s Three and Lady Sif (I guess), all died to protect Asgard, died for the people and for Thor, and Thor just what? Turns his back on all of that to become a drunk?

No, Thor wouldn’t do that.  Thor should have been down there beside Valkyrie working those fishing vessels when Bruce and Rocket came calling.  If Thor had any hesitance to join them it should have been, “I can’t abandon my people, I am needed here.”  He should have been fiercely guarding the tiny fraction of Asgard that’s left.

Thor’s depression and guilt was valid. Don’t mistake me on that. But they played it for jokes.  They made him a caricature of depression, made him “gross” and incompetent and the butt of the jokes, and in the process diminished what should have been a painful and poignant arc for Thor.

Instead we got Big Lebowski Thor, bathrobe included, who does stand up and fight yes but, in the end, gives up his crown and just fucks off to space to have petty pissing competitions with Peter Quill so he can?? find himself?? despite finding himself in Ragnarok already???

Thor’s entire arc in Endgame was shallow, mishandled, and disrespectful to the character, to Chris Hemsworth, and to the fans.

You, we, he, all deserved better than this.

Now we get to Steve.

Steve Rogers, Captain America himself.

I’ve had a lot of salt about Steve’s character and actions in the MCU but, all of that aside, he deserved so much more than what the Russo’s did to him in Endgame.

Hell he’s deserved so much more than what’s been done to him since post-CA:TFA.

But this is about Endgame specifically soooo….

Steve’s shown leading a support group in the beginning of Endgame, is shown talking about moving on and moving forward and learning to let go. Which is wonderful.  It sounds like the exact character development we’ve all been waiting for for Steve.

Which is, of course, the exact moment when Steve goes “nah just kidding, we don’t ever move on”.

Which, given the circumstances, is pretty fair.  If Steve was only thinking/talking about Thanos and the events of Infinity War.

But of course he wasn’t.

CA:CW should have been the end of the Peggy Carter saga for Steve.  He mourned her, he was finally moving forward, he’d kissed Sharon, he threw everything away to save Bucky, he gave up his shield, etc etc.

But no.  Endgame finds him right back there, clutching that goddamn compass, and making moon eyes at a woman who we all thought went on and lived a life without him, got married, had kids, and generally existed outside of Steve Rogers.

But no.  The Russo’s had to take that away from us too.

And yes yes I know I know multiverse or whatever but still.

Steve steamrolls his way through Endgame with skill and determination.  He picks up Thor’s hammer, finally worthy, which how??? Why???  (perhaps because he’s no longer keeping secrets??? Or maybe that’s just my salt talking? Who knows? Not me?)

And then he fights Thanos head to head.

(Although him wielding the hammer brought up an entire separate set of issues cause I’m pretty sure Mjolnir doesn’t actually summon lightning. Ragnarok pretty much said that the lightning has always been within Thor.  Mjolnir was just a control accessory.  But, you know, Russos *jazzhands*)

And then, in the end, he insists on returning the Stones on his own.

Only he doesn’t come back like he was supposed to.

Instead we’re given old Steve Rogers.

Because Steve returned the Stones and then ….went and found Peggy Carter and got married and lived an entire life with her ignoring everything he would have known was going to happen to her and around the both of them or something???

Or maybe not if the multiverse thing holds up but then who knows any more???

But then how did Old Steve end up right there by that lake on that day at that right time if he’s technically from a different multiverse???

Either way Sam gets his shield and the mantle of Captain America, which was fantastic, and Bucky more than likely knew Steve’s plan all along but the best read I really got on him was basically “eh” so he might well have been happy for Steve too.

But still, instead of finally achieving peace and continuing to learn to live in the future with Bucky and Sam and the remnants of the Avengers, his family and the life he’s built there over the past years, instead of putting the shield down because he’s learned to let go in the now, Steve only puts the shield down because he chooses the past.

He chooses the past over all of that and all of the people left who love him. Sure the argument could be said that he knew they’d be alright but still.

There is a deep well of dissatisfaction inside of me as to how Steve’s entire ending arc was handled.  Why did peace only come to Steve after Tony and Natasha were both dead and then was only found in the past?

No disrespect to Peggy Carter, I adore her, but were the relationships he had in the future worth so little that the past was the only place he could find happiness?  A past with a woman that he knows loved him but still moved on and found happiness outside of him, lived a full and happy life without him?

Steve didn’t get a character arc so much as he got a character circle.  A character loop.  He went right back to where he started.

Endgame erases all of the character development Steve underwent post-Avengers.  Just brushes it all under the rug.

The Russo’s stole the character development Steve Rogers spent a decade undergoing to give him their version of a happy ending.

They robbed him and us both of every bit of growth and forward motion Steve has underwent and I will never forgive them for that.

And now we get to Tony Stark.

Anthony Edward Stark.

The Iron Man.

Tony’s arc is, was, the longest and best developed arc in the entirety of the MCU.

It’s spanned 10+ years and has been nurtured and hand fed by Robert Downey Jr.

If Endgame got one thing right, one thing at all, it’s how they handled the majority of Tony’s arc.

From him laying the smack down on Steve once he was home, finally venting his emotions and his anger, all the way to him solving time travel before tucking his kid into bed, and then building an Infinity Gauntlet on his own even though Thanos committed genocide to get the one he had.

Tony Stark’s arc was glorious and expected and sad.

I think that my one almost complaint is that Tony stopped for 5 years.  On one hand he deserved the rest, deserved the chance to find happiness.  He was hurt and tired and he’d faced his demons and been left bleeding out with the death of half the universe weighing on his shoulders.

He deserved to just stop for a while.

On the other hand stopping is not something Tony has ever been good at, just like Pepper said.  A part of me thought Tony would be working, frantically, to find something, anything, to turn back the hands of time.  To track Thanos down. To get the Stones and then to get everything else back.

To get Peter and all of the others back.

But that’s not the route they went and I’m … okay? I guess, with that.

Tony was validated and vindicated and everyone would have finally listened to him.  It only took the death of half of the universe to do it.  But he was too tired, too hurt and untrusting to keep pushing.  I can respect that.

But of course once an idea worms its way inside Tony can’t let it go.  So he solves time travel on the fly and sets out to save the world.

Again.

His one stipulation is that he will do anything, everything, he has to in order to keep what he has now.  His wife Pepper and Morgan, his sweet little daughter.

So of course he doesn’t get to do that either.

After all of the blood, sweat, suffering, and mental illnesses, Tony doesn’t get his happy ending.  Not really.

He gets to rest, yes, but he loses out on everything he wanted to do with his kid.  In the process of saving the universe he becomes the one thing he never wanted to be for Morgan, a distant father.

A face on a screen, stories, memories other people have.

No matter how many holograms or inventions or whatever Tony left to Morgan, it’ll never replace him.

Morgan got 5 years with her father.  She’ll spend the rest of her life hearing stories about him, about how much of a hero he was.  And hopefully, with Pepper and all the others behind her, Tony will remain a hero to her and will not, instead, become her version of Captain America.  An untouchable symbol that Morgan will never live up to.

So, in the end, Tony sacrifices once again.

Watches the future he wanted crumble to dust in his fingers, lightning scorching him from the inside out as infinity rips him apart.

And he dies there, surrounded by some of the people who love him best.

His best friend.

His wife.

The son he almost had.

And, despite all of that, it is very very fitting that his death was at his own hands.

Thanos could take out half the universe, he could traverse time and space, he could humble Thor, terrorize the Hulk, rip Steve Roger’s up, survive shield and hammer and so much more, but the one thing he couldn’t do?

He couldn’t kill Tony Stark.

The only thing that could kill Iron Man, could kill Tony Stark, was his own heart.

Tony Stark takes the Infinity Stones in hand knowing how this is going to end, knowing that Stephen Strange set him on this path years ago.

Because didn’t Strange warn him?  Didn’t Strange tell him outright “I’ll let the kid and you both die to protect the Time Stone”?

Tony just never expected it to take a few hours and then 5 more years for Strange’s promise to finally be fulfilled.

So Tony does it knowing that after everything he’s been through, all of the pain and the suffering and the battles, it was only enough to have earned 5 years of happiness, 5 years of his dream.

5 years of being the father he always swore he’d be.

Tony Stark takes the Infinity Stones and dies for the entire universe, for his family, for his daughter.  Dies knowing that he’ll be doing the one thing he didn’t want to do, swore he would never do.

Leaving them behind.

Tony Stark brings us full circle as he stands as both equal and mirror of Thanos once again.

Man to Titan.  Good Father to Bad Father.  Life to Death.

Tony Stark picks up the weight of the universe and then he dies making sure that it has a future free from the same fear that has haunted him for a decade.

A warm light for all mankind, sent to sleep, to rest, knowing that finally everything will be okay.

And all he had to do was die for it.

So, I’ll close this out saying this:

This was written in one solid push after my first viewing and Endgame was dissatisfying for me as you might have guessed.  I am disappointed and angry at so much they chose to do to end out this iconic decade of cinema and to close out these character’s arcs.

There were a lot of points and little details I didn’t get to cover in this and perhaps a lot of points you might not agree with me on.

That’s okay.

Because, no matter what, there is one thing I know for sure.

We, I, will always have Tony Stark and the lessons he taught me.  The pain he endured and shared with all of us.  The bravery and strength he inspired in so many of us as we watched him struggle with physical and mental illnesses on screen.  As we watched him obsess and stress and love and grow.

I have never loved a character more than I love Tony Stark.

I have never been impacted by a character as much as I have been by Tony Stark.

I’m not sure if I ever will again.

So, Tony Stark is Iron Man.

He always will be.

And he saved more than just some fictional universe.

He saved a lot of us along the way too.

And we’ll always love him for that.

[qqueenofhades]

Okay ONE MORE because I'm needy. “Ring the bells that can still ring. Forget your perfect offering. There’s a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.” For Garcy or Asher/Maria.

The Engineering & Aerospace Technical and Industrial Summit’s keynote opening address is held in the New York Hall of Science, and starts four minutes past nine AM on April 28, 1972. Maria is in the audience with the others, Lockman lanyard around her neck, notepad and number-two pencils at the ready. As promised, it’s a notably international gathering. President Nixon’s groundbreaking visit to China in February means that a group of student engineers from Beijing have been granted permission to attend, and they sit together in a self-contained huddle, with wary glances at the others. There are Mexicans, several Brits (instantly recognizable as they moan about the quality of the conference-supplied tea) and a decent selection of Western European intelligentsia. There are also some who may well be from the other side of the wall. Maria has heard snatches of German, something that might be Polish, and other Eastern Bloc languages, though nobody is dumb enough to openly speak Russian. The fact of this being conceived as a showpiece for the promotion and exchange of advanced American technological prowess means that it is also a possible target for the Soviets. There are a few ordinary-looking men in plainclothes, occasionally wandering up to random delegates and making friendly conversation, who Maria suspects of being CIA.

The keynote address is dull, but Maria takes dutiful notes. There are three more days of panels and papers to go, and the morning proceeds as you would expect. Weedy men in badly fitting suits struggle with their slide projectors, and drone on about bogglingly obscure minutiae in commercial combustion engine design. Even some of the other Lockman delegates are yawning, but Maria pays intent attention, and not just because it’s her job. She’s good at this, she knows she is, and she translates some of the more obtuse mathematical formulas into plain English before she hands them over to the men, who are supposed to understand better than she does, but don’t actually. Shocking.

Lunch is held in the cafeteria, a not-terribly-appetizing selection on offer, and Maria wrinkles her nose at whatever is pretending to be beef stroganoff on her plate. As she’s trying to decide whether she wants to eat it, a voice says, “Excuse me, is this seat taken?”

She looks up with a start. She thought it would be one of the Lockman engineers, but it’s not. The man is tall, lean, a few years older than her, and wearing a trim blue blazer, a tie, and slacks that actually fit. He does not have one of those disagreeable mustaches; he’s clean-shaven, and his hair is thick and dark and prone to flip over his forehead. His eyes are dark too, lively and intelligent, and his strong nose suggests southeastern Europe, as does his accent. The badge around his neck reads Jugoslovenski Aerotransport. JAT, the national airline of Yugoslavia. He might be into those very engines.

Maria is surprised – yes, there is open space at the table, but there are spots at other tables too. Presumably he should be sitting with the rest of JAT, as she should be with the rest of Lockman, but she makes a small gesture, inviting him to set his tray down. He does, swings his long legs over the bench, and examines the dismal culinary prospects without relish. “Do you think they’ll make us eat this the whole time?”

Taken aback by the fact that he has read her mind, Maria laughs. It feels like something for which she should have asked permission, though from who she has no idea. “I hope not.”

“I hope not too.” He speaks English well, mostly fluently, with the careful intonation of someone who has learned it out of books. “I’m sorry,” he says. “I am sitting down next to you, and I have not introduced myself. Asher Flynn.”

“Maria,” she says by reflex, glancing down; his name is indeed printed on his badge, though it strikes her as slightly Anglo for someone from Yugoslavia. Not that it is her business why he would have any kind of name at all. “Maria Tompkins.”

They shake hands, and he nods to her, having evidently also read her badge. “You are with Lockman? That must be exciting. They work with NASA, yes?”

Maria nods back, though she cannot help be wary of why this man has chosen her to chat up and immediately seemed interested in her employer. They choke down the gluey stroganoff for a few moments, and then she says, “Isn’t Yugoslavia a communist country?”

This is rather skip-the-formalities with someone she’s just met, and Asher Flynn looks surprised. “Yes,” he says, as if that was obvious. “Well, mostly. Tito is no friend to Moscow, though, and we are officially non-aligned. We’re the only country in Eastern Europe where you can travel abroad without an exit visa, and emigrate if you want to. Those poor bastards in the USSR, they need a passport even for domestic travel, they have to request leaves of absence from their hometown council if they plan to be gone longer than thirty days, and they can’t leave the country. I wouldn’t want to live that way.”

Maria notes the elegance of this answer, how he seems to be responding to the real question (are you a Soviet spy?) hidden within her first one, while never letting on that he is. Or maybe it’s just her imagination, and he’s gotten this a lot from suspicious Americans, inclined to mistrust a dark young man with an Eastern European accent and an interest in spaceflight technology. Maybe that’s why he goes by Asher Flynn, if the name is easier for the West to trust. Maria takes a bite of bread (stale), and says, “So that’s where you’re from?”

“Yes. SR Croatia. Zagreb.” He doesn’t seem offended by her asking. “You?”

“Texas.” She bites her tongue on asking if he knows where it is. Just because she couldn’t find Zagreb on a map doesn’t mean he can’t. “Houston.”

“Houston,” Asher says, nodding. “Yes, yes. Where they launched Apollo 11. Were you there for that?”

Maria looks at her plate. She can feel the stroganoff revolting, threatening to come back up and taste even more vile this time, and swallows heavily. Asher cannot know that he has stepped directly onto her most vulnerable sore spot, her most enduring wound, and she tries to concentrate until the urge to scream and run backs down. He can sense at once, however, that something is wrong. “I didn’t – ” he says. “Sorry, is that – ?”

“I – no. I wasn’t there.” The words are dredged out of her like leaden anchors. “There was – there was a family emergency. My son, he – ” God, no, no, no, she is not telling this man she just met, she is not doing it, she is not throwing it onto him, and yet she is. “My son actually – my son died that day. It was – a bee sting, a bad allergic reaction. He – he didn’t make it.”

Asher blinks like she’s hit him. There are any number of things he could say or do in response, not least some screaming and running of his own. Then he reaches out and pats her hand; his own is large enough to cover it, if he held on, but he doesn’t. “Please forgive me,” he says quietly. “I did not know, of course, but I am very sorry. You may tell me to go away and eat my lunch somewhere else, if you would like.”

“I – no.” Maria is determined not to crumble, not to sit here and cry in the middle of the cafeteria, and she might do that if he left. “No, it’s – ”

He’s still looking at her, pensive, considering. Then he says, “What if we throw away this mess, and go get a sandwich? I heard New York has good sandwiches. The next panel I want to attend is not until two o’clock.”

Maria tenses. “Are you just – because you feel sorry for me?”

“I do feel sorry for you,” Asher says, simply and unpretentiously. “But I was going to ask if you wanted a sandwich before you said that, so it’s not why. There is a shop on the corner. It would take only a few minutes. If you would like.”

Maria supposes there is something to be said for the fact that he took the dead-son bombshell and his next move to is to seek out more of her company, to see her cracks and her ruins and somehow find them -- well, not beautiful, but not dead, unbearable, disqualifying. She can give into it, she’s never going to see him again, and the stroganoff is disgusting. She pauses, then says, “Okay.”

Asher smiles – it’s unforced, natural, dazzling, and her insides do something strange – and gets to his feet, once more nearly tripping over the bench that has not been made with the interests of a six-foot-three man in mind. He strides at her side as they leave the cafeteria, as Maria recalls the warning against walking alone in New York and then decides that after all, she isn’t alone. The sandwich shop is not far from Shea Stadium, bedecked with graffiti, and the 7 train rattles overhead on its elevated tracks, felonies presumably being committed aboard. It looks seedy, but Asher ducks inside with easy confidence, strides up to the counter, and orders them both a New York sub special, opening his wallet and carefully counting out cash to pay before Maria can offer to go Dutch. It’s hot and greasy and possibly the most delicious thing she has eaten in her life.

She looks at her watch when it’s done, decides to get back so she can serve as Lockman stenographer for the afternoon sessions, and Asher escorts her back. As he regards the Unisphere with a slightly ironic expression, Maria asks, “Is this your first time in America?”

It’s rich of her to be asking, since she’s a newcomer to the city herself, but she finds herself wondering. He nods. “Yes,” he says. “I can’t say that New York’s impressed me very much.”

“Is it different back home?” Maria has no idea what Yugoslavia is actually like, other than presumably Soviet Union-lite. The American imagination does not encompass much social diversity (or quality of life) over there in the Red parts of Europe, those oppressed and faceless millions bereft of the freedom and luxury of the West. “Better?”

Asher shrugs. “Every country has its problems. It was devastated by the war, the Nazis occupied it and turned it into a puppet state – it used to be the Kingdom of Yugoslavia, but the last heir to the throne fled in 1941, and the monarchy was abolished. That’s the year I was born, so I don’t remember, but Tito rallied the Partisans and the anti-fascist forces, and they fought to drive the Nazis out. Then he became president of the republic, and he separated from Stalin fairly quickly. But my mother was born in a farmhouse with dirt floors, in a poor and rural country that was still essentially in the nineteenth century, and now she lives in a nice rent-free apartment in Zagreb. She can go on vacations to the seaside and to cafés with her friends, her health insurance is paid for, she has a television set and a washing machine and likes to read Žena u borbi and watch soap operas. I can even take her to Paris, Milan. I don’t think that is so bad, no?”

Maria glances sidelong at him. The way he speaks about his mother makes it sounds like he loves her, and is proud that she has a comfortable life. Maria wonders what Asher is leaving out, what sacrifices are made for this, but then, is it any less than the sacrifices made in America, this increasingly strange land that they all accept as the norm? She looks at this dirty city, the trash blowing in the gutters. Remembers the pictures of burning TV sets and prostitutes and homeless people in suits sleeping in the street. She says, “No, it sounds nice.”

They reach the fairgrounds, and go inside. Asher gives her half a bow, old-fashioned, oddly charming, before he returns to the JAT contingent, and Maria finds herself inexplicably reluctant to see him go. In her defense, he was polite and well-dressed, gracious about that inadvertent emotional minefield, interesting to talk to, not from around here, and saved her from having to eat the cafeteria food. Out of nowhere, she wonders if he’ll take her to lunch again tomorrow, if she could induce him to do so, but that seems manipulative. She could even ask, but that – no. She doesn’t want to give the wrong impression. Not when, as she already has to remind herself, they are never going to see each other again.

[ezmodo]

Volume 7 Shorts - Sleepover 1 (V7E2)

“Things were looking bleak for Team RNJR…”

Ruby’s tone was low and ominous as she leaned forward from the edge of her bed. She commanded the attention of the entire room. 

Penny’s attention at least. Yang and Nora were focused completely on their video game on the other side of the dorm room, bumping shoulders aggressively as they battled. Though sitting with Penny on the bed opposite of Ruby’s, Blake and Weiss were equally distracted.

“What then?” Penny asked. Her fists clenched in anticipation as she leaned forward to match Ruby.

“Penny, stay still!” Weiss squawked indignantly from behind her.

Penny squeaked out a tiny ‘oops’ before hurriedly unclenching her fists and sitting up straight. Weiss huffed and set back to brushing Penny’s hair while Blake went back to work on her nails.

Penny chided herself internally. Ruby and her team went out of their way to have a slumber party just for her. She was even getting the princess treatment! She’d never had her nails painted before and if she wanted her hair changed she’d usually have to ask her father to design and machine a new set for her. Penny endeavored to be a better slumber partier.

“Nothing was working,” Ruby continued. “Ranged weapons didn’t put a scratch on it and even Jaune’s new sword-sword, Crocea More, only made the Grimm angrier. Ren had just gotten thrashed and the beast was charging him! Nora tackled him into shelter under a nearby house, but it didn’t care. I fired round after round into its back,” Ruby mimed each shot, “but the Grimm ignored me. It reared up, brought its giant hooves down, and--!”

Ruby jumped up on the bed with her hands braced above her for effect. She paused dramatically and if Penny would have held her breath had she the need to breathe in the first place.

“It stopped! Its rear hooves were firm on the ground but its front half floated in the air! I jumped down to get a better view,” Ruby continued her act by leaping from the bed to the floor, “and that’s when I saw him. Standing between his friends and certain death, Jaune stopped the Grimm’s charge dead with brute strength alone!”

Before she could rise to her feet and cheer, Blake and Weiss each placed a hand on her shoulders to keep her seated. Penny couldn’t help but wiggle eagerly in her seat. Ruby certainly lived an exciting adventure after Beacon.

“It was noodle against demon horse noodle!” Ruby said as she continued acting out the struggle. “The odds were against him. With two tons of evil Grimm pressing down from above-”

“There is no way this ‘demon horse noodle’ weighed two tons,” Weiss said, cutting Ruby off. “And what kind of Grimm is a ‘demon horse noodle’ anyway?”

That was a good question. Penny scoured her memory banks and couldn’t find any Grimm that she would classify as a noodle. She could imagine a Grimm horse easily enough, but a horse noodle? Maybe it was like a centipede with hooves? Specialist Schnee would almost certainly know.

“It must have been a new type!” Ruby argued. “Back me up here, Nora.”

Without turning away from her game, Nora responded. “Yup. Half horse, half noodle, all demon. Big as a house.”

Yang snorted derisively, eyes still focused on their game. “Okay, sure. But two tons? No way. Ol’ Vomit Boy might have beefed up a bit since Beacon, but even I couldn’t lift two tons over my head.”

Nora laughed. “Aww, that’s okay buttercup. Being third strongest of the group is nothing to be ashamed of.”

The game paused with a cheery tone and the room fell completely silent. Weiss and Blake’s movements stopped briefly and they shared a quiet sigh before continuing Penny’s pampering. Ruby mumbled a quiet ‘oh boy’ before Yang looped a not-so-friendly arm around Nora’s shoulders.

“Third, huh?” Yang asked, and Penny thought she saw a faint flickering of flames coming off the blonde’s long mane. “Who are you putting at first place in this little fantasy of yours?”

Nora forced a loud laugh and likewise looped an arm about Yang’s shoulders. “You know there’s only one queen around here.”

They were on their feet in an instant, hands locked together in a tense grapple. Penny glanced from Ruby to Blake to the girls locked in mortal combat. What was happening?

“Oh yeah?!” Yang grunted as she tried to force the shorter girl down to the ground.

“Yeah!” Nora returned with a snarl, not giving an inch to the taller girl.

“Put your muscle where your mouth is, short stuff!” Yang hissed.

Mouth muscle? Did she mean her tongue? Did she mean..? Penny thought Nora was ‘together together’ with Mr. Ren. And wasn’t Yang likewise with Blake? Would their partners mind? Was that something friends did to compete? She’d have to ask Ruby.

“You, me, arm wrestling. Best two out of three. Winner take all!”

Oh. That made much more sense.

“Arm wrestling?” Nora snorted, stepping back. “Puh-lease, buttercup. If we’re doing this then we’re going to settle it once and for all. We’re going to the gym to hit the weights.”

Yang cracked her knuckles. “Fine by me. I’ll show you who’s the strongest. We just need a witness. Who’s down?” she asked, turning excitedly towards the others.

“Pass,” Weiss and Blake deadpanned in unison without so much as a glance away from their current task.

A contest of strength sounded sensational, but she needed to hear how Ruby’s story ended. “I am a little...indisposed?” Penny offered apologetically. It would be rude to interrupt all of Weiss and Blake’s hard work.

“Looks like it’s up to you, Rubes,” Yang said with finality.

“Uhhhhh….” Ruby stalled, looking to the others for help.

“Oh!” Penny interrupted. “I would like to hear the rest of Ruby’s story, if you don’t mind.”

Ruby sagged in relief and mouthed a silent ‘thank you’ her way. Penny preened - she was glad to be of service. She did want to hear the rest of the story, truthfully. Ruby was a wonderful storyteller.

Yang clicked her tongue and turned towards the door. “We’ll be back soon. That is, if Nora can even walk after I’m done with her.”

“Pffft!” Nora answered, following her rival. “You’ll be dragon your sorry butt back here in no time.”

Yang froze before she reached the door. Turning back, she stared Nora down for a long moment before bursting into laughter.

“Dragon?” she guffawed, throwing a friendly arm around Nora and pulling her towards the door. “That’s a good one.”

Nora laughed merrily along with her, returning the side hug as she pulled the door open. “I’ve been holding onto that one.”

Before they could make their way out, Weiss shouted after them. “Hold it you two!”

The laughing girls stopped and turned back to the heiress, eyebrows raised.

“You can’t go out looking like that!”

Both girls looked down at their clothes. Tank tops, short shorts, and bare feet. Excepting the last, it seemed like standard gym gear to Penny. Not that she’d ever gone to a gym.

Nora and Yang shrugged in unison. “It’s after midnight. No one’s going to see,” Yang said.

They turned away and headed out of the room chatting amicably, the aggression from just moments ago completely forgotten. “I can’t believe they’re going to galavant across campus dressed like floozies…” Weiss grumbled as the door swung shut. Ruby and Blake laughed quietly at that.

“Soooo...where was I?” Ruby asked, settling back onto her bed.

“The demon horse noodle,” Penny beamed, excited to hear the rest of Ruby’s tale.

“Right! Noodle vs noodle, battle of the century,” Ruby’s eyes narrowed briefly before she giggled. “Or like five seconds. Jaune ended up flat on his back, so naturally I, as team leader, had to swoop in to his rescue…”

[capcarolsdanver]

Home

Request: hiiii !!! I loved your one shot "the endgame" about Brie. Could you write another one, still about Brie and her non celebrity grilfriend. Something maybe cute and fluff (and loooong if you can, don't hold back :p) about maybe, they move to a bigger house and they have to make choices about their home, the furnitures and rooms in their home leading to talking about their future together maybe ? thaaaanks :p (from @starslazyandcosy)

Pairing: Brie x reader

A/N: This one took me way too long to write, and I’m not even sure I’m 100% happy with it. I always seem to struggle writing for real people but I definitely went through major writer’s block this week. Hopefully will have some more stuff out soon! Let me know what you think!

“I’m home!” You announced as you walked through the front door of the house you and Brie shared.

“In here, babe!” You heard Brie shout from the lounge room. You put down your bag and your keys and went to join her. “How was work?” She asked as you sat down next to her on the couch.

“It was okay,” you replied as Brie pulled you closer to her so she could kiss you. You returned the kiss and pulled back to smile at her. “Have you heard anything about the house yet?” You asked nervously.

Though you loved the house you and Brie shared now, the two of you had decided a while ago to go on the hunt for something new. After all, Brie had lived here well before you two got together and you both wanted to take the step of buying a house together. Not to mention, you both agreed that you wanted a bigger house to be able to house more guests and Brie was set on setting up a home gym so she could still train while she had time off from prepping for movies.

You’d found a house in Santa Monica that you both absolutely fell in love with the moment you saw it. It was much bigger than the house you lived in now, with 3 guest bedrooms instead of just one, plus there was plenty of room for Brie’s home gym and much more. You had immediately put in an offer for it and were anxiously waiting to hear if it had been approved.

“Not yet,” Brie sighed. Your shoulders fell and Brie placed a comforting hand on your arm. “We’ll find out soon, though. They said we’d hear from them by the end of today so it should be any time now.”

“I think that makes me even more nervous,” you chuckled quietly and Brie laughed too before she pulled you into an embrace. You felt yourself relax into her body as you let her hold you and rest her head on top of yours. “God, I hope we get it. I don’t know if we’ll find another place I’ll love as much.”

“I know, Y/N. Me too.” Brie kissed the top of your head and relaxed into the couch more, pulling you almost on top of her. You stayed there for a while, holding each other until Brie’s phone began to ring, making the two of you spring up. She quickly reached for her phone, shooting you an anxious glance before answering the phone and holding it to her ear.

“Hello?” She greeted. She grabbed one of your hands with her free hand, holding on tightly as she talked to whoever was on the line. You watched her intently, unable to read her expressions or her half of the conversation as she talked. “Really?!” She suddenly exclaimed and locked eyes with you. “Okay. Yeah, we will. Thank you so much.”

She hung up the phone as you sat in anticipation.

“Well?” Brie put her phone aside and looked at you with a slightly shocked expression on her face. “Brie?!”

“I think we just got our house.” You screamed with excitement before jumping on top of Brie.

“Are you serious right now!?” Brie laughed with absolute joy, wrapping her arms around you and offering a wide grin.

“Dead serious.”

“Oh my god,” you laughed before clinging onto Brie and kissing her passionately.

------------------------

“Well. It’s emptier than I remember.” Brie looked over at you before rolling her eyes.

“Yeah, no shit Captain Obvious,” she chuckled.

After the offer for the house was accepted and all the paperwork had been filled out, you and Brie were the offical home owners of your new house. You had been given the keys and so the two of you found yourself standing inside your house for the first time since you had first seen it. Of course, the house was fully furnished then and so the rooms seemed a lot more spacious now that they were completely empty.

You watched Brie idly walk around the empty living room with a soft smile on her face.

“You know, I kinda completely forgot we actually need to get stuff to put in every single room,” you laughed as you took in the space around you. Brie chuckled before gesturing to a spot near one of the walls.

“My couch is gonna look perfect right here,” she grinned. You sent her a displeased expression.

“Brie, please no.” She turned to you with her mouth slightly open and her brow furrowed.

“Hey! What’s your beef with my couch?” You playfully roll your eyes at her.

“Stop fooling yourself. We both know that couch is the most uncomfortable thing in the world to sit on.”

“But it was the first piece of furniture I bought when I moved out on my own.” She pouted at you and you sighed and made your way to her, placing your hands on her waist and giving her a sympathetic look.

“I know, babe. But this is a brand new place that we have together. Don’t you think it would be nice to start fresh and choose our furniture together, too?” Brie looked down in thought for a moment and then met your eyes again, the pout remaining on her face.

“Hmm. I’m not making any promises but I guess I’ll consider it.” You leaned closer to her and met her lips with your own, immediately wiping the pout from her face as she smiled into the kiss.

“Thank you. That’s all I need to hear,” you said softly, grabbing her hand and pulling her to continue walking throughout the house. You walked down the hallway and glanced into every room.

“So, we’re setting these all up as guest bedrooms, right?” You asked Brie. She shrugged tentatively towards you.

“I guess. For the time being, anyway.” You nodded at her in thought and peered inside the room you were walking passed.

“Well moving day is next week, so we better get some furniture shopping done, huh?”

“Damn, you really want to get rid of my couch that fast, huh?” Brie pouted again and you laughed at her, stopping to give her a kiss on the cheek.

------------------------

The task of picking out furniture for your entire house ended up being easier than you’d originally thought. Thankfully Brie was taking some time off, and you had managed to take the week off from work too, otherwise you could imagine it would have been a bigger challenge getting everything organised.

Moving day had come along pretty quickly, and there was a team of people from a moving company helping to deliver and set up all the furniture you had chosen together. It was like the house was coming to life right before your eyes, all the different furniture and some art pieces you and Brie had purchased complimenting each other really well as they were all set up in their respective places.

Brie was standing near the dining room, towards the open glass doors leading out to your back yard and looking around the place in awe. You could only imagine she had the same incredible feeling as you did about the place you could now call home.

“This is all a lot more exciting than I thought it would be,” she said in quiet amazement as you approached her. Her eyes danced with absolute joy and you felt a grin take over your face.

“I know. Can you believe this is all ours?” You vaguely gesture around you at the house, shaking your head in disbelief as you and Brie stood together.

You could have sworn you saw tears forming in Brie’s eyes, but before you could really take notice, she offered you one of those smiles that make you fall further in love with her, her eyes crinkling at the sides as she pulled you in by your waist. She rested her forehead against yours for a moment, quietly giggling, before tenderly kissing you.

You smiled into the kiss, which was quickly broken up by the sound of someone awkwardly clearing their throat. You and Brie looked towards one of the movers who gave you an apologetic smile.

“Sorry to interrupt. Uh, do you mind showing us which furniture you want in which guest room?” He threw his thumb over his shoulder in the direction of a few other guys, all standing with boxes and parts of what you assumed was bedroom furniture.

“Oh yeah, of course!” Brie happily replied. She removed her arms from around your waist and made her way over to the guys, disappearing with them down the hall towards the guest bedrooms.

You sighed contently as you stepped through the doors to the back yard. Much like the house, the yard was also a really good size. You and Brie had wanted a pool, which you got. The hot tub you also got was just an added bonus. Brie already had two dogs before you started dating which you absolutely loved, and you thought the yard would be perfect for them too.

You were pulled out of your thoughts by another mover who had been setting up your large outdoor table. He had obviously finished what he was doing and began heading back inside before stopping near you. He offered you a kind smile.

“This is a great house you’ve got yourself.” You nodded in agreement, the smile yet to leave your face. “I’d love to move to a place like this one day, it’s a really nice house for a family. Do you two have any kids?”

“Oh. No,” you said, a bit taken aback. “We actually aren’t even married yet.” You chuckled slightly and offered an awkward shrug.

“Huh.” The mover seemed slightly surprised by your answer. “Well, I guess there’s always time. And hey, at least you can always just convert one of those guest rooms into a baby nursery or something.”

He gave you a friendly nod before leaving you alone. You lost yourself in your thoughts for a moment before arms wrapped around your waist from behind and pulled you in towards a warm body.

“Hey, baby,” Brie breathed out. She placed a kiss behind your ear and rested her chin on your shoulder. You hummed in greeting, your hands coming to rest on Brie’s arms.

“The guys said they’re almost done, they just need to finish up in the bedrooms. Then we’ve finally got the place to ourselves.” You quietly hummed again, and Brie very quickly picked up on your sudden quietness. “You okay?” She softly asked, bringing her lips to your shoulder to offer a reassuring kiss to it.

“Mhmm.” You turned around in Brie’s arms and brought your own arms to rest over her shoulders. Her eyes moved across your face, at first with concern until she watched a soft smile take over your face. “I’ve never been better,” you whispered and your smile grew as Brie let out a laugh and pulled you in for yet another kiss.

------------------------

You stretched your arms with a satisfied sigh as you padded towards the living room. It had been a long day and you were glad to finally have the house to yourselves. Brie was already sitting on your new couch watching whatever was on the tv but looked over at you when you joined her.

“I’m so pissed off that you might have actually been right about my couch this whole time.” Her pout was back on her face and you laughed at her.

“See, I told you,” you shrugged. “This one is like heaven in comparison.” Brie playfully rolled her eyes at you and you looked at her with a smug expression on your face.

“Yeah, yeah. I get it, it’s amazing,” Brie deadpanned. You chuckled as she wrapped her arm over your shoulders and you shuffled closer to her to let her pull you into her side. You laid your head on her shoulder, and she rested her cheek against the top of your head.

“This is nice,” you mumbled contently and Brie hummed in agreement as a comfortable silence fell between the two of you. You both idly watched the tv for a few minutes before Brie spoke up again.

“So.. Did some of the movers also ask you if we had kids or was it just me?” She questioned. You lifted you head from Brie’s shoulder to look at her, forcing her to bring her own head back up too.

“Seriously? I thought it was just me!” You exclaimed. Brie chuckled and looked at you.

“Yeah, I guess this house could maybe give off a strong family vibe?” She shrugged. “I don’t know. I just know I loved it from the moment I saw it.” You watched her as she bit her lip in thought and seemed to daydream for a moment.

“Be honest, though,” you said, snapping her back to reality as she curiously looked at you. “When we first came here to look at the house, did you think maybe one of those guest bedrooms could one day make a pretty good baby nursery?” Brie paused for a moment to consider her answer.

“Well yeah. In the future, maybe.” She grinned slightly. “But you know I’ve gotta marry you first before any of that can happen.”

“Oh yeah?” You asked, a grin taking over your face in response.

“Of course, baby. You seriously think I don’t plan on marrying you?” She scoffed. “As if.”

“Well that’s good, because I definitely plan on marrying you. Soon, preferably.” Brie smirked at you.

“Mm, I like the sound of that.” She practically purred, leaning over to kiss you passionately. You melted into the kiss and she guided you to lay down on the couch, moving her body on top of yours. Her hands began exploring your body and she continued kissing you, the intensity increasing every second until you had to break from the kiss to catch your breath.

Her lips made their way down your jawline, kissing and nipping down to your neck and letting her teeth rake along the sensitive skin. You let out a soft moan and Brie’s hands gripped tightly to your hips as she lifted her head to look at you, unable to stop herself from leaning down to kiss your lips again.

“How about we take this to the bedroom? I kinda want to see how much that new bed can handle.” She raised her eyebrows playfully, earning a laugh from you, and she quickly stood up, pulling you to your feet and towards your bedroom for what you can only imagine was going to be an eventful first night in your new home.

[something-tofightfor]

He’s Not Here - Part 10

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Word Count: 4700

Rating: M (light swearing)

Author’s Note: I don’t own Billy’s character. I’m just writing this for fun.

Parts 1-9 can be found on my Masterlist (link in bio)!

Feedback is welcome - Always. I’d love to know what you think! Sorry about the delayed posting of this chapter... it’s a little longer than usual to make up for it. The night in question (drunk Billy) can be read about in the NSFW Alphabet’s “bonus” section (at the bottom). 

Summary:  You meet the Castles, Billy makes a revelation, and you remember something that acted as a catalyst for your current situation. 

** Takes place well before the events of Daredevil S2 and Punisher S1 **

Tagging: If you want to be added or removed, let me know.

@banditthewriter @breanime @obscurilicious @padfootagain @madamrogersstorytelling @ooo-barff-ooo @agent-bossypants@suchatinyinfinity @chibiyanai @songtoyou @doneobrien @ilkaeliseb @editboutique @marauderskeeper @delicatelilyflower @drinix @likethetailofacomet @king4thesirens @ymariejp @blah-blah-fuckit-shit @ethereal-heavcns @mr-robot-x @rageshots @shinebrightlikeafanbase 

In the five days since you and Billy had talked about what was going on between you, things had fallen back into place much more easily than you would have imagined. True to his request, you’d stayed in his apartment until Monday morning, (you’d gone back to your place to get clothes, toiletries and your phone charger, which had ended with the two of you in your bed for a change) and the time had been more than enough to show you that Billy had truly meant what he said. 

There were still moments throughout the days when you saw that Billy’s eyes would lose focus, his jaw would lock and even your touch wasn’t enough to draw him out of his thoughts, but you were getting less and less worried. Billy had gone to two meetings with his friend Curtis, a man that had been honorably discharged from the military after losing most of his leg in combat. Curtis’ meetings were useful, Billy had said, and it was a good way for him to get used to being back home by being around people that he was comfortable with.

“Hey.” His gaze was soft, a smile on his lips as he opened the door of his apartment for you, gesturing for you to come in. He’d finally unpacked, and the place was looking lived in again. “Have a good day at work?” Billy was in the process of finding a job, so he was at home while you were in the middle of planning an event for the same company that you’d been working for when you met Billy… and the irony was not lost on you.

“Yeah.” You set your purse down on his table and allowed him to tug you into his chest, arms going around you. “Yeah, I had a meeting with Emily and her father today. They’re excited to work with us again.” Billy hadn’t reacted at your use of the woman’s name, but you pulled back and looked up at him nonetheless, wanting to see if he had any sort of response. After all, she’s the last woman he was in public with.

“She texted me today, actually.” Billy leaned down, his lips brushing over yours slowly. “Wanted to know if I was interested in being her date for the event again ‘for old time’s sake.’” He shrugged, pressing his lips to yours more forcefully, one of his hands sliding up your back. “I told her that I wasn’t interested.” You stared at him, and for a moment he looked confused before smiling again - this one a brilliant grin. “She’s going to be so mad when we walk in together.” Oh. we’re going together? I hadn’t even thought of that.

“I can’t antagonize her, Russo.” You sighed and his lips met your forehead. “At least not until we’re there and we’ve already been paid.” His laugh warmed you, even as he let you go and you moved past him into the kitchen, taking in the different dishes on the stove and counter. “What time are they coming, Billy?” Even though it was the middle of the week, Billy had decided that it was time for you to meet his best friend in person - so Frank and Maria Castle were coming to New York City to have dinner with the two of you.

“They should be here in about 40 minutes.” He stepped behind you, hand grazing your waist as he moved to the stove, picking up a slotted spoon and stirring one of the covered pots. “Just enough time for me to finish this, and for you to get changed if you want.” His attention was on the food in front of him, and you moved to the edge of the room, leaning against the door frame as you watched his movements. He’s so focused. A smile tugged at your lips as he moved gracefully from the stove to the fridge and then back, bending down to open the oven. I could get used to this. As if he could sense that you were watching him, Billy glanced back at you over his shoulder, long hair falling into his eyes as he winked at you. I think I’m already used to this.

---

“So, Bill and I met about six and a half years ago, and we hit it off right away.” Frank and Maria were sitting across the table from you, Frank gesturing with a beer bottle in his hand. “He’s the best friend I could have ever asked for, you know?” Billy shook his head, looking down before he sipped on his own beer. “Maria loves him and so do the kids.” Billy was grinning, red in the cheeks and his neck. “Bill said that he had something to tell us, though.” What? You looked over at Billy and he met your eyes for a moment before clearing his throat.

“Yeah. Well.” Billy set his bottle down and casually reached over to put his arm around the back of your chair, his fingertips closing around your shoulder. “I… we…” He paused, and you turned your head to stare at him. He’s telling them? “We had a conversation the other day, and I wanted you guys to come over and meet my...girlfriend.” I guess he is. Frank’s jaw dropped and Maria’s eyes widened, but both of them stayed silent. “I don’t really have many other friends, and I know that you’ve spoken to her before Frankie, but…” He sounded unsure for the first time, and you bit your lip, waiting.

Frank and Maria had been friendly when Billy had opened the door, though they both looked surprised to see you lounging on Billy’s couch. Dinner had been a lot of fun, with both the Castles falling into easy conversation with you and Billy about a variety of topics. And the dinner Billy had made? It was perfect. Garlic beef tenderloin with mushroom gravy, mashed potatoes and roasted vegetables and fresh baked bread had seemed like a literal feast, but Billy had pulled it off without difficulty, and again you’d been surprised at what the man could do. And he did it to … for me? “Billy, that’s… wonderful.” Maria was grinning, reaching her hand over to grip Billy’s tightly. “I’m happy for the two of you.” Your blush matched Billy’s, but it was Frank’s words that really got to you.

“Finally picking quality over quantity, eh Bill?” Frank smirked, shaking his head. “I knew there was something different about this one.” He jerked his chin in your direction, shaking his head back and forth. “All those video chats and the letters? Never seen you like that before, Russo. Glad you didn’t fuck it all up.” That broke the tension, and all four of you laughed, Billy leaning over to kiss you on the temple. “Can I borrow her for a minute, though, Bill? Wanna talk to her about something.” Billy removed his arm and you stood, grabbing your beer and waiting for Frank to stand too. “Your balcony good?” Billy nodded as he and Maria stood to begin clearing the table and Frank led the way through Billy’s living room and over to the sliding glass doors.

After you were both outside, Frank was silent for long moments, elbows resting on the railing. You stood next to him, looking out over the city. Billy’s apartment was on the eleventh floor, so there were plenty of tall buildings around you, along with a ton of ambient noise. “Is there… What’s up, Frank?” The man licked his lips, shaking his head.

“Bill’s my best friend.” Frank’s voice was gruff. “He’s been with a lot of women, you know? I’m sure you do, you’ve been … you’ve known him for long enough.” You nodded. “He seems settled with you.” Oh? Really? “It’s… nice to see him relaxed.” Frank was silent for a moment. “What I’m trying to say is that he’s never introduced Maria to anyone. I’ve met a few of them, and they’ve all been...” He looked down, stomping his foot once. “Not like  you. Not at all like you.” You felt a warmth spreading through your body as Frank confirmed what you’d hoped was the case. “What do you know about Bill’s life?” Frank turned his head to look at you, and the expression on his face had changed. “About… his childhood, I mean?”

Of all of the questions Frank could have asked you, that was the one you weren’t prepared for. You took a deep breath and closed your eyes. “He… hasn’t told me too much, Frank.” There was no reason to lie to Frank, and you hoped that he’d tell you something more - giving you an insight into Billy’s life. “He got drunk one night when we were out, but this was before anything had happened between us.” You frowned. “He mentioned that he grew up in a group home. That he didn’t have a family.” You felt your eyes prickling with tears as you continued. “He told me everyone leaves him, and so he’s always been more willing to leave others.” Frank nodded. “He’s never known what it’s like to be loved without question.” Frank looked at you, still silent, and though his brow was furrowed, it wasn’t an unfriendly stare.

“Do you love him?” His question caught you off guard and you didn’t respond. “You don’t have to answer that, because I can see the truth on your face.” Frank stepped closer, the hand not holding his beer reaching out to touch your arm. “Don’t hurt him. And don’t let his insecurity hurt you.” Frank leaned in, talking quietly. “He cares about you. He wouldn’t have done this if he didn’t. Bill’s not the hearts and flowers and romance kind of guy, but he’s still got feelings buried under all of...this.” Frank gestured to his face before taking a long drink of beer. “Don’t make him regret this - or you. If that happens, I don’t think there’s any coming back from it for him.” Frank stood up, finishing his beer and then pulling you into a tight hug. “I want to see you around a lot, because you make Bill happy.” He stepped back. “He didn’t stop talking about you when we were over there.  He used your name.” Frank laughed, swallowing hard. “He had a picture of the two of you in his pocket all the time, you know?” I didn’t. Holy shit.

“I didn’t know he had it with him.” Frank nodded, the smile creeping back onto his face.

“Don’t tell him I told you about it.” Holding up one hand, you promised that you wouldn’t and Frank led you back into the apartment, where Billy and Maria were side by side, washing dishes. Her laughter carried across the open space, and you felt Frank relax next to you at the sound. He made his way over to where his wife stood, his hands going to her waist as he stepped behind her, kissing the side of her neck as she leaned back into him, still laughing. Billy looked over his shoulder at you and you tilted your head to the side, smiling. I’m definitely used to this.

Half an hour later, Frank and Maria had said their goodbyes - the woman hugging you tightly as she whispered “be good to him” in your ear, and Frank putting one arm around your shoulders as he stepped out the door. Once they were gone, Billy sighed, stretching his arms toward the ceiling and offering you one of his hands. Taking it, you let Billy lead you to the couch, where he sat and pulled you onto his lap. After you’d leaned you head against his shoulder, his arms circling your waist, he took a deep breath. “I’m sorry that I put that on you without warning.” His chest was rumbling as he spoke, and you brought one hand up, settling it on his shoulder. “I just didn’t know how to … I’ve never done this before.” He sighed. “I wanted you to meet Frankie and Maria, and I wanted to tell them… I wanted them to know that you’re mine...” He tightened his grip on you, and you felt his heart racing in his chest. “I know we decided that you and I were… but… I don’t know if…”

“Hey. Hey, Billy.” You sat up, looking into his eyes, which were filled with panic. “This was perfect. You caught me off guard, yes, but not because I didn’t want it to happen.” You shook your head. “I just didn’t think that you’d want to tell Frank so soon. I mean, he’s your best friend, and…”

“I talk about you in Curt’s group.” His voice was soft, and you froze. He does? “I’ve never used your name, but I talk about you.” He sighed, fingers stroking up and down your side. “I told Curt I need to get better and do better this time I’m home, and that I need to get myself back in the mindset that I’m not at war anymore… and that you’re a big part of the reason.” That’s serious. “It’s getting harder to come back home. Every time I go, I think I’m fine, but then when I get back here, everything goes to shit.” He sounded sad, but he was smiling, his eyes focused. “One of these days, I’ll tell you everything.” Everything? “I know Frankie took you outside, and I can only imagine what he said, but I hope he didn’t scare you away.” Leaning in, you kissed him, your hand moving to his cheek as you did so, and you felt him pull you closer.

“Billy, whenever you want to tell me about your life, I’m here.” Your forehead was pressed against his and he nodded once. Fuck it. “Frank told me that you kept a picture of us with you over there?” His soft laugh made his eyes crinkle at the corners but he nodded.

“I did.” He licked his lips. “I told you I wanted more before I left.” I didn’t believe him. I didn’t realize until just now that I didn’t believe him. “It was from the day we went to the Central Park Zoo.” That was from before we were… when we were just friends. “Do you remember when we took that?”

“I do. It was… your way of thanking me for taking care of you that night you got drunk.” He nodded.

“You stayed. You took care of me and you stayed and you didn’t try to take advantage of me - you didn’t want anything from me, and I wanted to do something nice for you that wasn’t at night.” He scoffed. “I was trying to prove to you that I actually did want to be your friend.” He tilted his head and nuzzled into your neck. “But really, it was getting harder and harder to see you in my place or yours without making a move on you, and I figured that if we were in public, it would be easier.” Humming at the feeling of his lips moving across your skin, you shifted your body, moving your hands to his hair and scratching along his scalp, closing your eyes.

“You kissed me that day, Billy Russo. So your plan didn’t work.” He laughed, nipping at your neck before he moved lower, tongue out and moving against your collarbone.

“Yeah, well, we got a good picture out of it… and I think that just maybe that picture was what got you to let your guard down with me.” You’re 100% right.

---

14 months earlier

“You know, you can walk next to me, you don’t have to pretend like we aren’t here together.” Billy’s voice was loud, and you immediately stopped, turning to look at him with a huge smile on your face. “I invited you here, I’d like to walk with you.” He made his way the final few steps to you, and you felt his hand brush against yours  as you fell into step next to each other, making your way through the zoo’s walking pathways. It had been Billy’s idea to spend the day together, and he’d brought it up a few days earlier, via text.

After the night you’d spent drinking together - when you’d had to help him home and into bed because he got drunk - he’d gone radio silent for nearly two days. You’d talked the morning after, seeing the surprise in his eyes when he woke up next to you, still dressed in his jeans and you fully clothed, his arm tight around your waist. He hadn’t questioned you; you thought he’d been too embarrassed to do so, and so you hadn’t mentioned the conversation you’d had, or the look in his eyes as he’d asked you to stay. He’ll remember it on his own, or he won’t. You’d cooked him breakfast as he’d done his own version of the walk of shame to his shower, jeans hanging low on his waist, hair messed from pressing against the pillow.

Even as you cooked, you felt an ache in your heart, because there was something familiar about moving around in his kitchen, about taking care of him. You’d never admit it out loud, but waking up next to Billy, feeling his arm around you and seeing those eyes when you first woke up had felt right… and that’s why the friendship hurt so much. But it’s also why you need to keep it this way, you reminded yourself as you’d flipped eggs onto his plate and added two pieces of toast and some bacon. Anything else is out of the question.

He’d come out of the shower looking much better and more alert, and though he was casually dressed in a pair of basketball shorts and a dark t shirt, he was all business, thanking you for taking care of him, for getting him home, and for making sure he didn’t pass out in the hallway or on the floor. Waving him off, you’d stayed long enough to make sure he ate while filling him in one some of the previous night’s details and then you’d left, giving him a quick hug. You’d waited to hear from him, and so on Friday night when his text had come through - ‘Busy Sunday? Wanna take you out and thank you for being so nice to me’  it was like a weight had lifted from your chest. You responded that you had no plans, but that it wasn’t necessary, and he’d sent back a short reply. ‘I want to. Be at my place at 11 am.’

And that’s how you’d ended up at the zoo with him on a chilly Sunday morning. He hadn’t told you where you were going until you’d arrived, and as you turned to him, a wide smile on your face, you’d seen in his eyes that your reaction was what he’d been looking for. “I know it’s a small one, but it’s close by, and since it’s cold, we can see everything pretty quick.” He actually thought this through. Before you could help yourself, you’d asked a question.

“Is this a date?” Though caught off guard, Billy didn’t flinch, shrugging his shoulders. You knew that if he hadn’t had a beanie on his head, he would have been running a hand anxiously through his hair.

“If you want it to be?” He sounded nervous, and so you’d smiled, ducking your head and stepping next to him as he’d walked to the ticket booth, paying for the two of you. The first few hours had been fun. You’d never been to that zoo before, and Billy pointed things out, talking about visiting with the Castles, about his favorite exhibits and about his life in general, asking you about your own past, too. The two of you had taken pictures of each other, enjoying the time you were spending together, enjoying the day… and it had been easy. You’d listened to every word he’d said, watched his every action with your heart pounding because as time passed, it felt more and more like a date. We’re out in the daytime. We’re doing something that’s not drinking or eating. This is… he wanted to spend time with me. More than once, he’d reached out to squeeze your hand, pulling you toward an exhibit, talking excitedly.

In the back of your mind, though, you were waiting for the other shoe to drop - for someone to recognize him, for one of his previous dates to call out… something, anything to ruin the time you were having and bring you back to reality… but it hadn’t happened that way. By the time you were in front of the grizzly bear exhibit, you and Billy had been laughing for long minutes, fingers twined together as you walked. It had been his suggestion to take a picture together, and you’d agreed without hesitation; after all, you had multiple pictures with your friends - how was one with Billy any different? Except you knew that you wouldn’t regard this one the same as you did all the others - no, this one was going to be special. You positioned yourselves so that the bears were visible behind you, and Billy had put his arm around your shoulders casually, pulling you closer to him. You could smell his cologne even through his jacket and you automatically wrapped an arm around his waist, getting closer.

It was easy. It was comfortable, and it was everything that you’d wanted it to be as you leaned into Billy, waiting for him to take the photo. “Alright, on the count of three, I want to see a smile on your face.” He was talking quietly, and you saw him looking down at you on the screen, biting his lower lip. “1...2...3.” His arm tightened on your shoulders and you couldn’t help but grin, staring at his phone. “One more.” You rolled your eyes but didn’t stop smiling, looking up at him and at the same moment, he looked down at you, a wide smile on his face. He got a picture of that, too. I know he did.  You were right, of course, and as he showed you both pictures, you felt that same uncomfortable ache in your chest again. Friends. That’s it. That’s all we can be. “I like these. We look like we’re having a good time.” His tone was still soft, and you nodded in agreement, looking up to meet his eyes.

“We are having a good time, Billy. You should send those to me.” He tapped on the screen a few times and you felt your pocket vibrate as he tucked his phone away, taking a deep breath. “Thanks.” You were still facing each other, staring for long moments until he turned away, looking at the bears with his hands on the railing, gripping it tight. “So what’s next for today? We going our separate ways after this?” Though it was only early afternoon, you didn’t have any reason to believe he had anything else planned for you and so you were surprised when you felt his arm go back around your shoulders, pulling you into his side. Oh, OK….

“I thought I’d take you to dinner.” He paused, “If you want to go, that is.” All day with Billy? This is… this feels like…

“This is a date. I want this to be a date.” You spoke for a second time without thinking, looking up at him and finding that he was again staring down at you, hat pulled low over his brow. He looked young and vulnerable, his beard dark across his pale skin. “And if this isn’t, then dinner definitely would be.” There was another pause and the next thing you knew, Billy had removed his arm from your shoulders, turning to face you completely and angling your body to face him. That done, he moved both hands up to your face and leaned down, closing the distance between the two of you.

“I’ve been waiting since the first night we met to hear you say that.” There was no taste of alcohol on his lips that time, and there was no hesitation in the kiss, either. Your mouth moved against his with ease, and you stepped forward, closing the distance between the two of you. Billy deepened the kiss almost immediately, tilting your head to give himself better access to your mouth and you felt something shift between the two of you.

You’d failed at keeping things platonic with Billy Russo, but in that moment, you didn’t care. When the two of you broke apart, you were both breathing heavily - his eyes were wide and dark, and your lips remained parted as you stared up at him. “I… was that OK?” There wasn’t a hesitation as you nodded, fingertips moving up to touch his cheek, and he closed his eyes, licking his lips. “Good.”

You didn’t make it to dinner until much later that evening.

---

[theonceoverthinker]

OUAT 2X11 - The Outsider

Hey everyone! Don’t even SMEE-k to me until you’ve read my thoughts on the episode below the cut!

Press Release Mr. Gold finds an unwilling test subject to see if a spell he has concocted will allow him to cross the border of Storybrooke – without losing his memory – and go in search of his son, Bae; Belle stumbles upon a vengeful Hook in the Storybrooke harbor whose main goal is to eradicate Rumplestiltskin; and Mary Margaret and David go house hunting in search of a bigger place to live. Meanwhile, in the fairytale land that was, Belle meets Mulan as the two set out to slay a fearsome beast called the Yaoguai, who has been ravaging the land. General Thoughts - Characters/Stories/Themes and Their Effectiveness Past What I like about this segment is the pair up. Both Mulan and Belle provide something that the other wants and while their story of “person with no experience befriends hardened mentor or friend figure with more experience while simultaneously melting her heart with friendliness and trust” is pretty simple and is about as predictable as these tend to go, Belle and Mulan are interesting enough that it works.

That having been said, Belle and Mulan don’t get nearly enough quality time together as they should, and it does hinder Mulan’s resolve to let Belle kill the monster and for a couple of reasons. First, Mulan has been characterized as really freakin’ stubborn thus far in the series and those scenes all take place after this one. Why would she be so willing to give in to fighting the Yaoguai, especially given all the love she has for her village? Second, Belle brings up the good point that she’s not a fighter but instead a researcher and Mulan doesn’t give her much of an answer to it. And when she does, Belle having something worth fighting for isn’t reinforced at any point in the episode, making her resolution weak. Also, Belle’s overall story is just weird. Is she trying to just prove that she can be a warrior? Is it about being a female warrior? Is the story about accepting magic when it’s light? Fighting beasts with kindness rather than violence? There’s a lack of clarity here and it’s makes Belle’s story here feel undefined and because of that, her defeat of the Yaoguai and resolve to go t Rumple afterwards doesn’t strike the powerful note that it’s clearly supposed to.

Finally, the approach to the hunters in this episode is weird. Why not have them on their side? Yeah, they’re douchey, but it’s not like in “The Girl in the Tower,” when Alice and the hunters had diametrically opposed reasons for wanting to go after the troll (Alice wanted to protect the trolls and the hunters wanted to kill the troll). Here, they all want to take the troll down. They also don’t establish the men as sexist, yet the episode tries to paint them as it later on. They’re just a weird blend of evil, but it does nothing to establish Belle’s conflict. Present I have a large problem with a lot of this segment. They’re trying to set up that Rumple is losing sight of getting back to Bae to deal out vengeance (“Tell me this is just about getting the shawl back” is a crucial line in the Rumple/Belle fight scene at the shop and it’s made to be a big point that Rumple doesn’t answer this) while not having established that as a conflict Rumple’s actually going through. His actions haven’t been excessive when this instance of dialogue happened, and they only get excessive after Belle is threatened and Killian goads him on. Even his interaction with Smee isn’t all that different from his interactions with the man in previous episodes. And I do recognize that they finally get to showing him act excessively aggressive, but the moment isn’t helped by the lack of appropriate setup earlier.

I get that Belle isn’t super receptive to Killian’s speech about Milah and Rumple’s evil nature because of the gun, and I swear I get that, but what is the point of telling Belle all of this if she’s not going to change her mindset in any way as a result of this, especially when she’s the one who the audience is supposed to connect with, is generally framed in the right, and is being told about two characters who have established a level of sympathy? Killian’s definitely taking things too far, but we as an audience know that his words about Milah’s death are true and Belle refuses to react to that, making the scene entirely pointless. I understand that the theme of the story is that “when you find something worth fighting for, you never give up,” but this is never challenged and especially as Belle is learning that Rumple murdered someone, that would be the perfect time to challenge that sentiment. But instead, she just leaves the situation at: ”Because his [Rumple’s] heart is true. And yours [Killian’s]? Yours is rotten.” Again, this makes Belle’s doubling down feel so much weaker than it should. Insights - Stream of Consciousness -The town line is glowing! The hell?! -Rumple, wipe that SMEE-rk off your face! -”It’s [Smee’s hat] always brought me good fortune.” You have a very warped perspective on “good fortune.” -It’s so weird seeing such an optimistic character like Snow deliver a eulogy, but when you think about it, she’s probably the best person. Her eulogy is all at once a celebration of Archie’s life, a validity of the sadness of the other townspeople in attendance, and an encouragement to keep on living while keeping Archie in their hearts. -I feel so bad for whoever’s job it is to make tombstones in this world. Between Archie, Rumple, and Killian, they must’ve gotten so fed up with all of the resurrections. I imagine they are like the Cabbage Merchant in Avatar: The Last Airbender! -Bitter segue, writers from the funeral to Archie being tortured. Bitter segue. -Archie, just say “he came to my office one time.” -How does Killian know Archie is a cricket? I’d imagine that Cora told him, but how does she know? -We’ve got our start of the Captain Beauty BROTP here...I love what this is going to turn to, but this is awkward af… -I don’t think I’m ever going to be over the fact that Belle defeated Captain Hook with a fucking BOOKCASE! XD -I am pretty sure that right after that scene in the library is where the hug blooper (i.e. My favorite blooper ever) took place! Update: OH MY GOD, IT TOTALLY WAS! -Rumple, what the hell are you wasting time on? You literally just got what you wanted! -”You expect to defeat the fiercest creature in the land with a book?” No, but give her a case full of them and you might be surprised! XD -Belle’s gambit in that wagon scene was weird. Did she know they were going to push her off the wagon? And if she didn’t, then why lead them the wrong way? If she wanted to go on her own, then why not just leave on her own? -Do platonic relationships have food, because Swan Believer’s is totally Pop Tarts. -Grumpy makes so many good points in his speech to Snow and Emma. Like, the fandom loves to infantize him, but there’s a reason why he’s as in-good with the Charming family as he is: He considers things that no one else will and for the most part, he backs that information up. -”We’re a bit homesick.” My previous point having been said, I’m sad that they don’t really acknowledge this point all that much to my memory. That also having been said, why wouldn’t you want to stay here? I’m with Isaac! Indoor plumbing is the best! -Belle is amazingly inquisitive and I love her no-nonsense approach to learning about Rumple and Killian’s beef with each other. -Rumple, especially considering what happens to Milah in roughly three seasons, fuck you for lying. Now I get it narratively-speaking and it makes sense for him as a character and I get that it’s a half truth. But still...fuck you for lying. -Also, as I said back in my review of “The Return,” I like how to a point, for as inquisitive as Belle is, she reaches a point where she won’t push an issue any further, and I like how moments like that subtly show the differences between Belle and Bae. -Damn, Killian. While I don’t know if you know who that scarf will lead Rumple to, that was EVIL! -I almost hate to make this comparison, but Rumple has a very Kylo Ren way of dealing with his anger (Breaking shit). -”And this is my fault.” Belle, this is so the opposite of your fault. Like, no. This blame game just doesn’t work. -”You’ll cast some spell that gives me no choice?” ...Just play the fucking Rumple irony clip here, okay? -Smee, why can’t you talk? RAT got your tongue?! -Belle rocks. It takes serious balls of steel to walk into an invisible portal, especially over water. -Batten up the hatches, Belle! -Archie, more like “Aren’t ‘chu glad to see me?!” ...They can’t all be winners. -Wow! Seeing Henry call Archie’s answering machine just to hear his voice just breaks my heart. That’s too real! Hell, Henry hasn’t even changed after the funeral. That’s too sad for words! How is this one moment the best part of the episode?! -”It’s just four people and a dalmation is a lot.” Snowy, baby, you have no fucking idea what’s to come! XD -”We could get our own place.” Jeez, Snow! Also, this is another point that’s brought up, but not really dealt with, not even really in the Season where they do get a house. Hell, at least suggest buying a house for all of them to live in together! The Swan Jones house had more than enough room for all of you! -So, Snow’s scene makes no sense. First, she poses that they should move out and then she talks about how they should take the chance for a fresh start that Storybrooke gives them. -”That doesn’t belong to you.” Belle, never change! XD -”It’s just ahead.” This line is the best segue ever! XD -”What makes you think his son wants to be found?” Oooh, with the Killian and Baelfire episode’s information in hindsight, that stings so badly, both as a point on Baelfire and Killian’s characters. Killian of course knows Bae wants to avoid his father after what went down with the portal, and Killian feels the same way about his own father after his abandonment. -Thank you, Killian for telling Belle the truth! Like, I get why this doesn’t prompt any change in Belle because of the gun he has on her, but yesss!! -”He will do anything to hold onto his power. Why do you think anyone who’s ever gotten close to him has either run away or been killed?” -Belle, do not destroy the town to save it! This isn’t “Man of Steel!” That monster is fire and the town is wood! I don’t need to read a lot of books to know that this is bad! -Mal, that was one badass curse! -Wait a sec. Belle left an injured Mulan in the path of a beast without letting anyone know this? -I’m looking at the David and Mary Margaret material, and I feel like if you mix the Season 2 energy with the Season 6 timing and context, this subplot would’ve been so much better. -”Unless we don’t want the same thing.” WHAT IS THE POINT OF THIS LINE? -The Cricket Believer hug soothes my soul!!! -”I knew it.” I’m going to be generous and give this line the benefit of the doubt that it was meant to be a joke. -Belle, why are you going on about how you can make Rumple powerless in front of his enemy?! -”What you’ve done cannot be undone.” Suuuuuuuuure Rumple. XD Arcs - How are These Storylines Progressing? Rumple’s Redemption - So, while I don’t think the episode made this come through effectively at all, the lesson of prioritization does hold through for a while, especially at the start of the next episode. Killian’s Revenge/Redemption - Well, Killian definitely gets his revenge! This I felt was also well done because it was effectively set up that Killian was going to go after Rumple’s love in order to destroy him throughout the episode. Favorite Dynamic Swan Believer. It honestly frustrates me that this has to be put down as my favorite dynamic. Now, that’s not because I don’t love Swan Believer. I fucking love Swan Believer, but when so many interesting dynamics are going up against each other, one of them should be theoretically higher than what amounts to a side story! But yeah. Emma’s struggling with and eventual comforting of Henry as he grieves Archie is really good. It’s a great continuation from what we got in “The Cricket Game,” as this is another aspect of motherhood that Emma has to learn if she wants to truly be a mother, and in addition to just generally comforting him and validating his feelings, getting Pongo is a big step (Or would be). That’s not only a cool thing, but it’s a motherly commitment for herself as she and Henry will be taking care of him together (Or would, if Archie was really dead). Writer I am so disappointed. Goldberg and Chambliss were freakin’ legends for me going into this episode, with prior episodes having such a strong thematic presence. How did they drop the ball this badly? Like, there is just no sense of story structure in either segment and it tarnishes what has the potential to be two great stories. There’s no cohesion between the individual scenes and what we’re supposed to be taking away from them. Motivations and framing go out the window and while some of the individual character moments work, little else does. Apart from plot, nothing else changes, and that’s not what a story should ever do. The writing itself is shallow, playing the “tell, don’t show game” to say what the character’s problems are, but not showing how those are problems. Rating 4/10. This episode’s sole saving grace (Aside from great acting, set design, and music, but those are practically givens on OUAT) is it’s fantastic individual character moments, for any sense of cohesion in the delivery or understanding of his story is nonexistent. Belle’s character isn’t shown to grow from any of her experiences (In either story), Rumple’s actions are weak for what the story is trying to make them seem like, and the nuances of Killian’s motivation, while given time to be presented, are completely ignored. As for the flashback, the same lack of cohesion applies as to exactly how Belle is supposed to learn what the episode is supposed to paint her as learning. Additionally, the time spent with the Charming family adds up to nothing. Flip My Ship - Home of All Things “Shippy Goodness” Rumbelle - Something I find so interesting is how Rumple hates fairies, but Belle is so much of the closest OUAT gets to a fairy fangirl outside of Nova. She’s shown to be friendly with Blue, to the point of making her Gideon’s godmother and teaming up with her on more than one occasion and is much more welcoming at the sign of using light fairy magic in her quests. Also, in terms of the episode itself, Rumple and Belle get a lot of cute moments. Their initial scene in the shop screams of puppy love, their hug after Belle’s rescue is so nice, and before Belle’s shot, hers and Rumple’s farewell is utterly beautiful. Grumpy Beauty - I LOVE these two together! Everytime they share a scene, it’s so tiny, but it tells so much about how much they value each other and their emotional supportiveness of one another. The connection to “Dreamy” itself is just great and helps to reinforce when “Dreamy” encourages Belle to join the hunting party. Millian - So it all comes to an obviously dark place, but you really feel Killian’s fervor for Milah all throughout this episode, from Killian’s excitement at the prospect of his revenge to the more leveled way he speaks of Milah to Belle to the fact that he kept Milah’s scarf despite knowing better to the way he so quietly enflares when Belle says she died to the way he tries to goad Rumple into killing him, and to the wide-eyed venom at the town line. The character work here, both as a shared effort on the part of the writers and Colin’s acting, is sublime. ()()()()()()()()() Writing negative reviews are both the absolute worst ones to write, especially when you’re expecting a good episode. They’re easy to construct because it’s easy to explain why something doesn’t work as opposed to why it does, but fun to put together? Not at all. No one wants to see something bad unless it’s something for jokes like “The Room,” and I’m at the top of this list. I remembered loving this episode, and it honestly hurt to see that it wasn’t nearly as good as I built it in my head it to be from memory and nostalgia.

I sincerely hope the next one is better.

Thank you for reading and to those at @watchingfairytales. Season 2 Tally (96/220) Writer Tally for Season 2: Adam Horowitz and Edward Kitsis: (29/60) Jane Espenson (17/50) Andrew Chambliss and Ian Goldberg (24/50) David Goodman (16/30) Robert Hull (16/30) Christine Boylan (7/30) Kalinda Vazquez (10/30) Daniel Thomsen (10/20) Operation Rewatch Archives

[telltheworld-phff]

Chapter 45, part II: Wisdom

It took Carol a few minutes to close her mouth and come out of her shock. She never imagined she’d have to play host to a prince and a princess. She closed her eyes and tried to calm down. They were just people. Like anyone else. She had already met The Queen, for God’s sake, although nor her or Harry knew it was going to happen in that day. But now… oh, now she knew that they were coming and she was fan-girling and fidget-y and nervous and all she wanted was to grab her bag and run home to hide.

“Carol?” Harry tried and she didn’t listen.

She started pacing around in the kitchen, with a knife and a bell pepper in hand and it was almost funny.

“Carol?” Harry called her a third time and gave a gentle shake to see if she’d answer him.

“Yeah?” she said opening her eyes and looking at him.

“Are you ok?” he asked confused.

“I… Kind of. I guess. I don’t know.” she said and looked at him hoping she’d get the answers she needed in his eyes.

“You’re going to like them. They’re nice people and friendly and you’re going to meet your favorite prince. So it must be Friday, right?” he tried to joke.

“OH MY GOD.” she screamed and run out of the kitchen towards his bedroom and he followed after getting the knife and pepper from the floor where she had dropped them. She had opened her side of the chest of drawers he had given her – where she kept more clothing than she’d like to admit – and started throwing it all out to find something to wear. “OH MY GOD.” she kept saying and Harry decided it was best if he didn’t make himself known.

“I’ve got nothing to wear. I’m going to meet Carl Philip and Sofia and I’ve got nothing to wear.” she searched around in the pile on the floor.

“This is a bloody disaster!” she said. “A fucking nightmare. I have to go out a buy an outfit. Do I even need a hat?” she was fully out rambling.

Harry watched her freak out for at least five minutes before he stepped up and tried again to calm her down. It took him longer than he expected, a shower together and a quickie in the middle to Carol start to behave like herself. She did have what to wear and she got ready before him. She came back to the kitchen and started again to make dinner, this time wearing an apron above her clothes so she wouldn’t get tomato sauce on her white shirt.

She was midway cooking dinner when the doorbell rang and Harry asked her to join him on welcoming their guests. At this point he was pretty much playing house with her and was going to proudly introduce his girl to a friend. And he saw himself doing this lots and lots of times in the future. Carol took three deep breaths, and a huge sip of wine, and took off her apron to join him.

Harry opened the door and greeted Carl Philip loudly. Sofia was standing behind her husband and shyly was watching them who looked like two teenagers in a party.

“It was about time you came to London, you prick.” Harry said while he gave his friend a weird handshake and a hug.

“Someone has to work. Not everyone of us get it easy like you, Wales.” Carl Philip answered in his almost non noticeable accent.

“As if...” Harry said and looked at Sofia. “Still trying to figure out what you saw in him Sofs.”

Carol looked at him surprised to hear the nicknames. He had never told her about it. But to be honest she almost never asked him about Royal things.

“Well… I’d take a long time explaining, Hazza.” she said hugging him and Carol saw how petite she really was. And how sweet her voice sounded.

“Let me introduce you to my gir…“ he stopped and looked at Carol and she discreetly shook her head. “Friend.” he said and she saw the kind of disappointed in his eyes. She almost regretted stopping him. Almost. “Carolina. This is Carl Philip and his wife, Sofia. But you already know that”

Carol blushed furiously at that.

Sofia looked interested between Harry and Carol and was the first to speak.

“Nice to meet you, Carolina.” she said and offered her hand for a handshake.

Carol shook Sofia’s hand, trying to hide that her own was slightly shaking, and did a small curtsy to her.

“I can say the same, Your Royal Highness.” she answered politely.

“Oh...” Sofia was surprised. “There’s no need for that kind of formality in here. But I appreciate that.”

Carol smiled and then greeted Carl Philip in the same way before the couples went to the living room of the cottage. Harry had prepared a few snacks and chosen a bottle of wine. They sat on the living room a chatted for a while.

“I can’t help but ask, due to how you greeted us, Carolina, that you have a certain knowledge about… us.” Carl Philip asked after the basics were talked about.

“Well… I know more than most in my country for sure.” Carol answered and shrugged.

“That’s interesting.” he answered. “But one would think it is because you’re friends with Harry.”

“Nah… I knew it before I met him. But he does help me sometimes.” she said and jokingly patted Harry’s knee.Out of habit her hand stayed there and she caressed it. She was seeking reassurance from him. It didn’t go unnoticed by Sofia who smiled discreetly.  “What I didn’t know was that you guys were friends. Because you have never been spotted together.”

“Yep… Royal Watcher” Harry answered when he saw Carl Philip’s surprised expression and the non spoken question.

“Well, darling, it’s what everyone assumes. That we’re not close. But we are. We were just careful to not let people know because we have to follow precedence and stuff. But all the Royal Families are connected somehow and everyone knows everyone. But Carl Philip and I we are friends for a while now.” Harry answered while pouring more wine in Carol’s glass.

“The non official parties are the best part, though.” Carl Philip just shrugged.

“Really?” Carol was curious.

“Yes. But since we have some traditions to follow, we don’t really talk about it. But Hazza and I go way back.”

“I bet you two wreaked havoc in the past.” Sofia said after sipping on her glass.

“Oh the troubles this redhead have made us go into.” Carl Philip laughed and held his wife’s hand. “But now I’m a family man.” 

“I know.” She said. “And you better be.”

“Remember that time when your father scolded us because we left in the middle of the night with no PO’s to go to a club in Stockholm?” Harry laughed and everyone joined him. “He started saying things in Swedish and I didn’t understand a damn thing. He did call my father and my grandmother after that.”

“What happened when you got here?” Carol asked.

“Grandma made my father ground me. Well... as far as grounding goes for princes.”

He and Carl Philip laughed hard at it and both girls understood it was an inside joke.

“What are you cooking Carol?” Carl Philip asked after he stopped laughing. “It smells delicious!”

“Minced beef stuffed peppers, with salad and rice. I had to think of something quickly.”

“That sounds great for us, don’t worry. It was with so short notice. Do you need any help?”

Carol didn’t answer at first because what could she say really? A princess was offering her help in the kitchen. If she said yes would she be breaking any kind of protocol? But this wasn’t a place for protocols because Sofia herself had said so when she arrived. If she said no, it would be rude. And one can’t be rude to a princess. Can they?

“I’d love some.” Carol answered getting up but bringing her glass of wine and taking another sip. Sofia did the same and they both went to the kitchen.

Everything was under control, Sofia noticed. The rice was ready, the salad too, she had made two sauces for seasoning and while the brunette checked the peppers in the oven Sofia looked around.

“What do you want me to do?” Sofia asked cheerfully.

“I think you might enjoy some bread, because of the tomato sauce of the peppers. Would you mind cutting them?” Carol said after she took off the kitchen mittens.

“Of course not.” Sofia answered and watched as Carol moved flawlessly in the kitchen. She knew where everything was and she owned it. It was home for her, not only the cottage inside a palace but the kitchen. She was way more relaxed here than she was in the living room.

“Harry looks so happy.” Sofia said while carefully cutting the slices of bread.

“Does he now?” Carol asked sipping more wine in an attempt to change the subject.

“He does. He’s way more relaxed and easy going than the first time I met him.” She answered.

“How was he like when you met him?” Carol was curious.

“You know… it wasn’t easy for me too, to meet a prince and date one and then meet princes and princesses and kings and queens. I lived in the real world just like you. But Harry… we met a few years ago, and he made me feel included and accepted. And that wasn’t easy to have, due to a few choices I made in the past.”

Carol only nodded. She knew what Sofia was mentioning.

“And he made me feel welcomed from the start. But there wasn’t this sparkle in his eyes. He was sad, but he used his non ending jokes and puns to cover it. Today’s the first day I really felt he’s relaxed and comfortable in his own skin. And it clearly shows it’s because of you.” Sofia finished cutting the bread and organized them in the basket Carol had given her, and she decided to give sometime for Carol to understand what she meant. So she put the basket on the nicely organized table and came back to the kitchen.

Carol looked at Sofia and sighed. She took a deep breath and the Princess noticed Carol was about to open up and didn’t want to interfere.

“You know… Harry and I. We… We’re not dating.” Carol said barely above a whisper.

“You’re not? Are you sure?” Sofia asked arching an eyebrow. “Well… it looks like it, they way you both behave. And he’s clearly in love.”

There it was.

The feeling she knew Harry felt for her, the one that she was denying she felt for him, but that she saw whenever he called or texted or tried to make her comfortable at his house. Harry loved her.

He showed her everyday how much he loved her. He showed it when he called her everyday to listen to how her day was, he showed it when he made time in his packed schedule to be with her, he showed it when he arrived at her door with ice cream and cookies, when he held her while she was crying homesick. He showed it when he supported her after successful meetings and when he scolded her and said she was acting like a brat. He had shown her so much love in these four months since her moving to London (and if she was to be really honest, since way before that), than she had saw in years of her previous relationships. He not only showed her, he showered her in love every single day.

And that was the problem. Even though she was trying (not much, because of the fear, but she was slowly starting to try) to let go of her past and make her subconscious understand Harry was a different man and that he wasn’t going to play with her feelings, she couldn’t.

Every time she stopped to analyse where she stood feelings-wise for him, this overwhelming sense of doing the wrong thing took the best of her and she gave in to her fears.

“I know.” Carol sighed and Sofia was polite enough to let her take her time to finish the sentence. “I know he’s in love. And right now I’m feeling bad with myself for giving him hope.”

“You don’t like him?”

“It’s not that. It’s… complicated.” Carol said trying to finish the conversation. But Sofia was a very determined person.

“Carol… every relationship is complicated somehow.. It’s in the core of it.” She said and sat on one of the stools in the kitchen.

“It’s that I have this fear of relationships due to previous experiences. And the fact that he’s a prince isn’t making it any easier.” Carol finally said turning off the oven and heating the rice so she could serve dinner.

“About your fear of relationships it’s understandable why you’re afraid of letting go and living the romance with him. But let me tell you something, everyone’s gonna make you suffer. One way or another, in different levels. Some are so bare minimum that one can’t even say its suffering. You just have to set apart the ones who do it in purpose and the ones who do it unconsciously. And the ones who are willing to make an effort to no let it happen.” Sofia said and looked at her warmly and smiled.

Carol felt so well in that moment. She deep inside knew she could trust Sofia and she knew she was just trying to assure Harry’s happiness would last. She wanted her friend happy.

“Thank you.” she whispered approaching the stool where Sofia was sitting. “Thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome.” Sofia said and held Carol’s hands in both hers. “Harry deserves to be happy and to have the family he have always dreamed of. And you’re the one he thinks he’ll share it, then I gotta give a little help if it is needed.”

Carol gasped and laughed.

“Well… Let’s not get carried away Sofia. He’s a Prince.” Carol said.

“So?” Sofia shrugged.

“So that I’m not suitable enough to be a duchess. He’d be better off with an aristocrat lady that was groomed for it her whole life.”

“Oh, for God’s sake Carol… what’s with this inferiority problem you’ve got?” Sofia said. “Let me tell you something. You don’t have to be suitable for his grandmother or father, you don’t have to be suitable for any head of government. You have to be suitable for him, to be his partner. To have his back. To hold him if so needed. You have to be, in your own way, the person he imagined his life with. And believe me, you are this person. I have never seen my friend so happy before. Harry was born into this, Carol. He knows about this system. He knows how hard it is, how consuming it is, how one will never be suitable and approvable to everyone. And believe me, princes around the world won’t bring someone into this overwhelming environment if they don’t think that person is the person for them. If he’s willing to bring you to this he both believe you’re the one for him and that you’re the one who’ll stick around and face this whole new world together with him. If he didn’t think so, you wouldn’t be at his house on a Friday night cooking dinner for him and his friends. Because this is his sanctuary. His safe place. The place where he can be himself and around trusted people.”

Carol listened carefully to what Sofia said and she knew it made sense.

There was a truth right before her eyes that she wasn’t seeing until it was pointed out for her.

“What you should really think about it whether or not you can handle this. There will be tons of people who’ll criticize you. And they’ll go hard and  unconscionable. They’ll talk about and have opinions about it either in your clothing, in your work rate, in your friends, what you do in your free time, the choices you make for your future children. Those people could even be in his family or in his inner circle of friends. But at the end of the day will be you and him against the world. Doing what’s best for your family and work. Having each other backs and doing the best you can in the situation you have. Knowing that if you fall, he’ll be right there for you and vice versa. Or you don’t think Harry would be there?” Sofia asked finishing her wine.

“Oh, for sure he would. Putting cushions on the floor and all so I wouldn’t get hurt.” Carol said and smiled.

“So there, my friend. You’ve found your soulmate. Don’t let exterior obstacles get into between you. That’s my advice. After all, I’ve been there and done that. I know how you’re feeling and the doubts you’re having. I still have members of the family that don’t like me, most people in my country don’t like me, the press is ruthless and unforgiving but I know that at the end of the day I’ll have the man I love and my son at home, cooking dinner, putting little Alexander to bed and being together. That’s what matters to me. That’s what I wanted., that’s what I’ve fought for.”

A small tear rolled on Carol’s cheeks and she didn’t let it turn into full on crying. Because she knew she wouldn’t be able to stop it.

She cleaned it and asked Sofia if she could get a hug. The Princess was more than happy to hug her new friend tightly.

“Thank you.” Carol said, they parted before the boys entered the kitchen to fetch another bottle of wine. Carol said dinner was ready and Harry promptly helped her with the serving trays to the table. He poured wine to everyone, Carl Philip put on a playlist and they had an amazing dinner together. Harry was constantly asking about Alexander and was enjoying the little mischief the little boy was doing. They ate a dessert made by Bernard and only said goodbye when it was almost midnight and Sofia said Madeleine had babysat for way too long.

They shared hugs and exchanged phone numbers at Harry’s door.

“Whenever you’re in Sweden, do call me, Carol.” Sofia said after they said goodbye.

“I’ll do. Thank you so much Sofia.” 

“You can thank me with an wedding invitation.” she whispered jokingly. 

Carol smiled while they waved goodbye to their friends with Harry side hugging her. She allowed herself to not worry tonight. She allowed herself to feel this growing feeling inside her. How it made her warm, how it made her powerful. How it made her happy and safe.

Harry closed the door  when their car was out of sight and asked how she was feeling.

“Great.” she answered.

“That’s good. That’s good.” he kissed her temple. “Why don’t you go and take off these heels and prepare a bath? I’ll be loading the dishwasher and cleaning up.”

“I’ll help.” Carol said and he soon interrupted her.

“No you won’t. You cooked for us, set the table. I’ll tidy things up. Prepare a bath and go rest.”

“But I don’t want to have a bath by myself.” she said and pouted.

“Oh babe. You aren’t going to. I’ll be up there in a minute.” he said and pecked her lips.

“Well… I’ll wait for you then.” she said before climbing up the stairs.

A/N: So here’s the chapter. 

I was going to make a small dinner and then make Carol have this conversation in Sweden (where she’d go for work), but I honestly think they should be together NOW. So, our amazing princess gave Carol the little push she needed.

Next chapter is Carol’s mom’s wedding and I am planning it to be beautiful.

Hope you enjoy it.

Special thanks to Vania and Bruna who read and re-read this chapter over and over and heard me complaining about how I couldn’t get it done. But now, it’s here. woohoo!!

xoxo