#like unless youre gonna talk to me about how you think the decision affects ME and not YOU... i dont care lmao

[hegrowth]

will most likely be remaking sometime in the next month or so. don't know if it will be before or after the new year, but I've been thinking about it and I'm at peace with the decision so if I want to then I will !

it may seem harsh, but if you feel any negative way about me remaking then you can go ahead and a) not say anything and b) unfollow me; making people feel bad about remaking, no matter how right you think you are, what their reasoning is, how inconvenient you believe it to be, or their activity level beforehand, is shitty. support your mutuals challenge 2k24. and yeah, I do still think about that stupid anon.

[anachronistic-falsehood]

Vash and Femininity: Trigun Stampede and its Themes of Bodily Autonomy, Exploitation, and Vague Gender Fuckery

alright sit the fuck down. we're gonna talk about THEMES

I was on Twitter- terrible idea usually, but a couple people I follow made some tweets that got me thinking about Trigun's overall themes, and here we are. So let's talk about some themes in Tristamp! And I'll take a couple looks at Trimax as well, just for fun :3

Let's look at how the showrunners utilize gender roles and exploitation of feminine characters to show how unhealthy Knives' obsession with his ideal of Vash is, and how horrific his exploitation of Vash and the Plants is.

Vash, from the beginning of Tristamp, is someone who cares about people's choices. When people kill others in front of him, he reiterates that whether someone lives or dies is not another person's choice to make. This is something he learned from Rem (a prominent female figure in his life). He refuses to kill people because that is not his choice to make. To kill someone is the ultimate removal of their bodily autonomy. They can no longer make any choices at all; they're dead.

Vash is also someone who has almost no choice in what path his life takes. He's constantly dragged around by outside forces, namely situations that are caused by Knives (which we'll get into later). Vash doesn't make things happen, things happen to Vash. The majority of events that occur are not his fault. He's pushed and pulled in a thousand different directions. His entire life is completely out of his control.

This can be seen as early on in his life as the Fall, something he had no control over and had no idea he even had a part in. Even later, in the ship with Luida and Brad, after he's been rescued from the desert, he's kept in handcuffs right up until he's shown to be of use to them and the Plant on their ship. After that, he could theoretically say "no, I don't want to go to other ships and heal their plants," but he doesn't. He's Vash. He's helpful and nurturing at his core, and these people have done so much for him just by letting him stay, so he'll do whatever they ask, no question.

This carries over into his adulthood. At Jeneora Rock, he goes to look at their Plant at one simple request, doesn't protest when he's dragged into a duel-- he doesn't take initiative unless someone's life is immediately at stake. He lets people tell him what to do and lets himself get dragged around by the wrist. He doesn't even pretend to have control over his life like Trimax Vash does, which I mean. Fair. Why pretend to have a grip on your existence when it's impossible to do anything without a gun pointed at your head?

Vash is a very passive character. He's nurturing, kind, gentle- he's a guy that fits a lot of very typical feminine character stereotypes. If you wrote this same story but made him a woman, I wouldn't bat an eye (but I would definitely be looking at it a lot more critically, what with the amount of stereotypically nurturing/motherly female characters in media already.)

This contrasts directly with Knives. He makes a decision and carries through no matter what stands in his way. He takes initiative. If Vash is a passive character, Knives is an active character. Wherever he goes, he leaves a lasting imprint. He makes shit happen! If outside forces make things happen to him, he'll go out of his way to make sure that particular force doesn't affect him again.

These two tweets I saw are what got me thinking about this originally. I just feel like here's a good place to put them as a segue into talking about episode 11.

Episode 11 is where a lot of this feminine imagery really just. Explodes in your face. IT'S RIGHT THERE. You can't dance around it if you try. And it kind of reaches a peak when the connection reaches 100%, the gate opens, and. well. THIS happens to the Plants.

Plants, in both Trimax and Tristamp, are almost always typically feminine-looking. Knives and Vash are the only two who are male or even masculine at all. Knives, as the most masculine out of all of them, is the one trying to take charge, and mould the world as he sees fit, to a degree that is detrimental to both him and everyone else. And Vash-- passive, feminine, kind and nurturing, whose Angel Arm in the manga always sprouts decidedly feminine-looking Plant parts-- is the one being exploited for Knives' plans. It's no mistake that they made the giant plant formation at the end of ep 11 look like a giant woman that almost resembles Rem.

Vash wants people to make their own choices and keep their autonomy when it comes to their bodies and lives. Knives is the exact opposite. He wants all Plants to become independent and he uses Vash to achieve that goal, without asking what Vash wants or even knowing what the Plants themselves would prefer. He exploits Vash for the soul purpose of trying to make these Plants have Independent Plant babies. He's completely incapable of seeing that his choices are not for the greater good! He thinks he's saving them, but none of his actions are for the good of anyone but himself. He’s just violating them for his own gain.

They're really leaning into gender roles for these guys, but in a way that screams "HEY, LOOK AT THIS! ISN'T IT FUCKED UP? LOOK AT HOW FUCKED UP THAT IS. LOOK AT THIS, AND BE UNCOMFORTABLE, AND KNOW THAT IT IS FUCKED UP."

Because it is! It's so extremely fucked up. They're using this imagery and these roles, something that makes most of us intrinsically uncomfortable, to drive home how unhealthy Knives relationship with his ideal of Vash is. That's the point. We're supposed to be uncomfortable with this.

Now of course there's some nuance to it. Like, you could see Knives as somewhat of a feminine and/or queer-coded figure as well, ESPECIALLY if you look at some of his panels in the manga, which could in turn lead to themes about infighting and control within marginalized communities, but that might be something for another post. :3

And there's definitely different ways you could take this! Vash, with all this feminine imagery, could be either transfem or transmasc coded, depending on what way you'd rather see it, which could lead into themes of how people outside the norm constantly face a lack of bodily autonomy and are exploited for purposes outside their boundaries. We could also look at Wolfwood and his lack of choice over joining the Eye of Michael and becoming the Punisher, and how masculine men (particularly men of colour) are often forced into violent roles against their will. If we look at Trimax, the exact same could be said for Livio/Razlo and people with disorders such as DID/OSDD.

There are many different ways you could spin these themes, some of which I don't feel personally qualified to discuss. If anyone who is qualified to talk about Wolfwood or Livio/Razlo or even other characters related to these themes, then god PLEASE add onto this post or make a post and tag me or something. I would love to read it!

Anyway, in conclusion: Vash is a feminine figure constantly taken advantage of and exploited and and he's so incredibly trans/nonbinary-coded that it drives me insane. Thank you

[verystrxxwberry]

We already have "Nevra as your boyfriend", so could you do Valkyon, Ezarel and Leiftan? Love your writing!! 💖

ELDARYA; Valkyon and Ezarel as your boyfriends

♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•.

𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭: Individual headcanons, fluff, sfw. ↝ 𝐂𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: We also have Leiftan’s hcs here, so I will simply do Valkyon and Ez in this post :). Thank you! It is a great compliment for me that you enjoy it. I hope you find this hcs to your liking! 

♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•.

VALKYON

At first he was very closed off to the idea of getting into a relationship, yet he found you interesting. Whenever you two talked about whatever came through your mind was enough to start a surprisingly absorbing topic to talk about. You found yourself enjoying his company after each long day, a company that with no doubt left you as relaxed as you haven’t felt in so long.

The same was for him. He found himself thinking about you quite a lot after each conversation. He had a smile on his face the next morning, remembering that little moment he had with you last night- He’d be zoning out as he thinks about it, ignoring completely his colleagues.

Valkyon is natural about physical language though the first days in the relationship he looked at your reactions to see if you were fine with him holding your hand, or touching the small of your back or whatever. He will always respect your boundaries, no matter the context.

He is way clingier in private than you would expect. He is a passionate lover, but will respect your personal space whenever he sees you are getting overwhelmed. Expect him to casually kiss the side of your neck, because your neck and shoulders are his favorite spots to kiss you. You’d get used to feeling his hand casually resting over your hip or shoulder constantly.

Don’t let him take his time to kiss you or you will end up making out for good long minutes.

The most patient man ever. He is so sweet to be real (bc he isn’t…). If you need comfort you are never going to lack it, if you need support you are always going to be cheered up to keep going unless it’s a bad decision. Valkyon knows you well enough to know that certain decisions will be the best for your well-being than others. 

If you are the type of person who truly does rant about your interests, he is the perfect partner for you. If he finds about any of your deep interests, he is gonna bring you stuff to stimulate the excitement they give to you (allow my adhd hyperfixation be mentioned here because valkyon should be my husband but he decided to die)

He may be protective, sometimes a little too much, but he isn’t the jealous type. He will advise you to get away from someone the moment he sees a toxic patron and how it affects you. Valkyon wants the best for those who he cares about. He won’t tolerate anyone disrespecting you.

No matter how tall you are, he is always going to be gentle with you even if his hands are all calloused from the amount of force he constantly uses for work. He is strong af yet he would never use that strength towards you, unless you want him to carry you around (which he will do by himself anyway)

He allows you to freely interact with Floppy, which adores you! You and the small companion are the two beings for which Valkyon would fight for until the end. He has a big need to protect you both from evil.

Long walks in the forest with him and sometimes Floppy as your tiny kid.

When it’s bedtime, expect him to be twice as clingy (even though it is quite overwhelming during summer because bro’s skin is FIRE :c). He interlocks his legs with you and wraps his arms around your body to make sure you can be warm.

He gives the best hair caresses and scalp massages ever!

Can’t sleep because of a nightmare? Hot chocolate time and cuddles!

He loves looking at you, no matter if you realize it or not. He admires your acts, your expressions, everything. God, your face, it is something he needs to check every second to make sure his mind remembers it perfectly. He adores you.

If you dislike something from what you are eating he is going to finish it for you (you can have his meal if you wish). He shares stuff with you without thinking twice, and even more when he knows that you will like it.

Valkyon opens up quite a lot with you and can get to be talkative with you as well, and that also includes the hidden humor Nevra and Ezarel mentioned several times to you. He has spontaneous comments that can make you laugh your ass off. But you didn’t expect that the jokes he had in mind were the typical dad jokes. You sometimes want to facepalm after hearing them, but seeing him laugh so much from it is contagious.

He has shelves with the gifts you give to him and other special memories about you which he looks to with so much love. 

His closet is completely open for you to pick anything you want!

Has a big blind trust towards you.

I recommend dating Valkyon, I rate it as 9/10. Would be a 10 if he didn’t die but anyway… he would spoil you with all his soul through the time you are with him.

EZAREL

He isn’t a really romantic person or someone who specifically searches for a serious relationship. At least that’s what he thought. It takes a long time for him to realize what he was actually feeling for you. And every time he thought about the term ‘love’ he shivered and tried to distract himself from his thoughts. But what the hell you were EVERYWHERE (that's why he teased you by telling you that you followed him everywhere -but it didn’t actually bother him-). He got his stomach checked by Ewelein and thought that you actually carried a virus with you, but then Ewelein told him “you simply like them, idiot.”

He almost made a whole drama from it, and even more when he couldn’t remove that feeling from his body. It took a looong time for him to get the courage to speak out loud his feelings to you. Until he did, all flustered and being a victim of your teasing, since you had never seen the elf blush like that until that moment.

The beginning of the relationship was quite… awkward. He doesn’t like physical contact, that’s a fact… but he wanted to have it with you, but he never had it with you before and he didn’t know how to start it. Ezarel stares deeply at you as he argues in his head whether to go and hold your hand or ask you first or simply leave.

The moment you asked he simply decided to hold your hand and look away, very nervous himself.

With time he gets used to starting physical contact, sometimes being so sudden that you would be the one getting flustered. And when you do start it… he melts but will never confess it. Though you can feel how he takes a deep breath and does his best to hide how his lips raised a little in a timid smile. 

You will learn about alchemy and some scientific facts which he will rant about, because in this relationship he will be the main talker and you’d be the listener. And no matter if he is always playing around, when it comes to your feelings, he won’t play a single bit with them. If you need to vent, he will be there. It is sometimes worrying how quiet he gets when you vent, as you are used to him actively participating in the conversation, but now he is genuinely listening to you with all his attention. He is known to be a good advisor even if he doesn’t know how to apply those pieces of advice to himself. Still he will be helpful.

Despite that, at first he used to be pretty blunt with his words. Ezarel is someone who never keeps silent with his opinion and he believes that everyone must be heard. If he didn’t like a meal you did, a handcraft you did, he’d say it simply, without considering how it would affect you.

Ezarel may be way too honest, but he has a heart and it almost broke when he saw that he was the reason why you got sad or insecure over something. He’d talk to you the moment he reads the environment. He doesn’t want to bring you sadness, he supports you in your hobbies no matter if you are new to them or more experienced. There is time to improve in any field and he doesn’t mean to be rude if he ever tells you that you should improve something.

He isn’t good at communicating with words, but he shows it with actions and sometimes even physical contact. As a way to show his support, his affection or something positive, he likes to kiss the bridge of your nose and sometimes the crown of your head.

He is smart, handsome, and he knows it yet when you compliment him, you boost his confidence in a way that he becomes the most arrogant creature in the world. (Nevra whines to you about it- “gods, your boyfriend is incredibly tiring, stop lying to him!”)

Your boyfriend is great and you know it. Ezarel is the peak of dark humor, and even if you stand dark humor, you would like to slap him more than once at the bad timings he sometimes has to spit some comments. Nevertheless you will be laughing so hard at 2 AM that Miiko will scold you both the next morning.

Bake something sweet for him and he will be on his knees for you. “Oh, my highness… give me that thing again…”- You baked him a simple chocolate cupcake.

Sleepy Ezarel is like a baby, and he is going to sleep on top of you, forcing you to caress his hair as he is almost asleep. Whenever you stop, he looks up at you with a little frown and says “never told you to stop…”

Sounds weird but he absolutely loves to sniff your scent and comment about how good you smell.

Ezarel is a big tease, and he flirts with you playfully just to see your reactions and tease you about them. He knows the effect his voice may have when he is basically purring for you -not like a cat, but he purposefully whispers to you with a husky tone just to make your heart skip a beat-.

Let’s say that when he found the news of you coming back from the crystal he decided to send you an anonymous letter that told you to meet someone at night. You were scared, but the surprise of being the owner of the letter made you fall more in love with him. Oh, he is taking you on his trip far from the city. 

If you want this angst, then let’s keep that you never knew anything from him once you came out from the crystal 🤫

Long story short, Ezarel started being a clumsy and awkward boyfriend but achieved to be one guy who made you feel a lot of emotions constantly. And luckily they were positive!

✰; remember to reblog and like to support my content, I hope you enjoyed it!

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

Hi. I read your post about being an "unreliable narrator" of your own life and I am having Feelings about it.

You said at the end to not respond with "relatable" if not friend/mutual etc. and so I am not doing that.

I am here to say Thank You, because you have given me a new way to describe an experience that I sometimes have.

Of course, my experience is very, very small compared to yours. I can pass as "normal" if I want to.

But still, you shared "Unreliable Narrator of Own Life", and so I would like to share "Executive Function Burnout" with you in return.

Thank you so much for sharing. Really. We are not the same, because no two people are really the same, but I see myself in you, and because I love myself and want myself to be happy, I also want the same things for you.

You are welcome to use "Executive Function Burnout" as a way to explain a thing.

I know words are hard sometimes (not always, but sometimes), so:

Executive = Decision Maker

Function = Capacity

Burnout = Used Up

I like finding connections between words, and translating complicated words into simple words.

I hope you have good rest, whatever that looks like for you. And I'm sorry I put so many words here.

Thank you for sharing. 💜

hey so. you nice about it so do appreciate, n think this problem caused by me not realize need elaborate what count as “say relate,” so that on me, n you tried respect that based on your interpretation, so am also gonna try be calm n nice about it

(tone tag is not mad. i think. well, if am mad it not your responsibility worry abt it)

by “don’t say relate” not just mean don’t say word “relate.” mean include saying anything that can be see as relating—say we similar, borrowing words, say see self in me, etc.

because often am describing level of severity that, unless you also go through, people don’t realize can affect that basic of thing. so people misunderstand to mean something milder. n that frustrate me because am try best to explain self as clear n work with communication disabilities. n history of be speak over by people…. for lack better term less severe in community.

now, don’t know how you (both actual you + general you for non mutuals) actually experience, don’t know how you actually understand. maybe you actually understand perfectly severity + actual experience. am have no way knowing unless know you more. and exact because have no way know unless that, n majority of people have met who do this don’t actually understand n experience, just ask people am not familiar with in general, not to tell me if they feel similar, if they relate.

to illustrate.

“burnout” very very. so very different from what am experiencing what am describe. have been very adamant in “do not call me burnout” because been repeat instances. if you not follow me for while, may not know that. n that okay not know! is why say “don’t say relate,” to prevent me see that.

& “executive function/dysfunction”, in way neurodivergent community typically think n talk about term, not describe what am experiencing.

n reason why say “don’t say relate” is, am can’t control how you feel. you (general you) can’t even control how you feel. can only ask you not do action. so ask you not do action. “relate all you want just don’t tell me.” kind of thing

again, do appreciate you be nice. n do appreciate you mean well, n want give me something in return. misunderstanding from miscommunication n that okay. hope you good day.

may borrow some of what wrote here into new post explain what meant by “not say relate if mutual / friend who experience this”, & why. please know it not target at you, you not only one, it something been thinking about do for while because it kinda unusual.

[tojikai]

Hihi, i hope you been well!🫶

I was planning on getting another commission on permanent mark for my bday(august) and i was wondering if you could answer these what if’s/questions on what the commission could possibly be on for me to make a decision (im very indecisive 🕴️) if that’s okay with you :))

1. how would’ve it went if they talked about it/had a genuine talk when satoru and her broke up

2. If her and suguru got together instead of her and satoru (like they never dated)

3. If suguru and y/n actually got together after the break up and before the accident, how would he react and how would he react, if it was after the accident but before he broke up with rie

4. And if the baby was suguru’s…

5. If she decided to not tell or have satoru involved with the baby after she had it

6. If she choose suguru over him /got with him during the pregnancy and afterwards, what would gojo do?

7. If y/n and satoru were married instead of just dating, would’ve he asked for a divorce or open rs to be with rie, and if y/n was pregnant or had a kid with him at the time? Would he still break up with her or try to get with rie somehow?

8. If y/n hadn’t lost the baby😔

9. them seeing each other again after the last chapter

10. If Y/n agreed to the open rs when bro suggested it☠️

11. Years after the ending/a timeskip

12. If y/n was pregnant when they broke up(without them knowing)

Also out of curiosity, would you rather date pm or sundered gojo 😭😭

hiii, and oh we have the same birth month !! <3 advanced happy birthday to you~ I'd be happy to answer your questions :))

even if they talked, i think it would end the same way. bc yn's problem is the way she handles her problems and i thinkl it contributed a lot to what she went through. satoru and her had a talk when he's breaking up w her, the problem is he didn't tell her that he cheated. and i think, if he straight up told yn during that talk in the first chap, she would've done something worse to herself. pm!yn really has bad habits that contributed to the events when they brokeup.

tbh, if yn and suguru got together instead, she wouldn't have gone through that. in pm, suguru is THAT man. the only problem i could see arising from that would be her mother. she can be a bit of a judgmental, but it won't be that big of an issue. we wouldn't have permanent mark if suguru and yn got together instead of her and satoru LMAO

in both situations, i think satoru wouldn't play it cool at all. he will admit that he has no right anymore, but the point is his rs w suguru and how he broke a bro code. until it's not just abt that bc he still loves yn :'> it would affect his rs w suguru (their rs would be heavily damaged, i think all that would remain is respect for the time and memories they had, but other than that, it would be impossible for them to be close friends again.) and his rs w rie bc it'd be obvious that he still loves yn no matter how hard he tries to hide it or push it aside.

if the baby was suguru's, satoru would probably lash out on him. about how he betrayed him and their friendship. shoko would be surprised but ofc,she wouldn't think it was something impossible to happen. suguru and yn would probably co-parent since they're not really dating, they might or might not fall for each other completely :> satoru's not backing down too🥹

if the baby's satoru's? he would've found out still. maybe not right away but one day he will. unless she makes the baby wear contacts and dye the hair😭 his emotions will be all over the place.

he'd fight for yn. try everything until he cant anymore. but if yn says 'stop' he will. just keep in touch for their baby (if it's his) and pray that a miracle happens 🥹

he won't divorce her if they're married. at least not right away, he'd probably confess first and let yn decide. if their rs doesn't get better, he might. it's a different story if a kid is involved tho, he's not gonna sacrifice that bc of his past. he doesn't want his child to experience it, so altho yn may ask him for a divorce and he gets w rie, he'd still end up going back to them, working for another chance.

if yn hadn't lost the baby, she wouldn't have left, they will coparent while satoru's trying to get her back (sunder-ish dynamic, but here yn would be straightforwardly rejecting him. she'd probably even get in a rs w someone else even when satoru's trying to get her back.)

it would be bittersweet. yn all healed and probably moved on from him, and satoru still hoping that they'll fall back together. yn would most likely have the biggest growth (losing her dependent behaviour, losing her vices, mature, healthy, ✨business woman✨)

is this the one in the beginning? it's not really an open rs, but more of a cool off, but if she did agree to something like that uhm.. he'd end up losing bc yn is a "retired party girl" lmao it's actually very easy for her to get with someone else, she just chose not to bc she loves satoru but if they got into an open rs. best believe satoru would crack first bc yn would be drowning in her liquor to care. she'd be hurt bc she'd catch on that he just want to be w someone else, but she'd be doing what he wants to happen just so she won't completely lose him. in the end, it'd be easier for her than it is to him. not bc she doesn't love him but bc she'd be too numb to care anymore.

i think the answer in number 9 can also apply to this. just a lot of changes :>

she'd most likely lose the baby without even realizing that she's pregnant.

and for the last question LMAO, i would say i'd rather not date if those two gojo's are the last ones on earth HAHAHAH but to choose, i'd say sundered gojo😭its bc sundered gojo has a reason for his decisions (yk the rs issues w yn) than pm gojo who left just bc his "crushiecakes" is back in town😭

[klausysworld]

Hey! Could I request a Klaus x Reader where Klaus wants to do something that could get him killed and the reader is adamant about stopping him and when Klaus explodes and asks why they want to sabotage his plans, they tell him they're in love with him and couldn't stand to lose him?? How it ends is up to you but I've wanted to see this idea written for a while and your writing is so so good <3

I don’t want to lose you

“I’ll go in and ‘negotiate’ with Mikael for the white oak while you two go in and look for Elijah, father won’t have hidden him well and once he sees me he probably wont bother keeping Elijah. Y/n if you could stay here and watch Hope that would be great, right are we good?” Rebekah and Hayley nodded and discussed how they would sneak in, Klaus walked off towards his art room and i just kind of stood there.

Worry boiled inside of me at the thought of Klaus being right in-front of Mikael who has a white oak stake just waiting to kill him. I quietly made my way back upstairs and straight to where i knew he was

“i don’t think you having a chitchat with your homicidal stepfather is the best plan if i’m honest” i spoke lazily as i sunk down onto the chair in the corner and watched as he got his paints out onto his palette and picked out his brushes

“mm while thankfully nobody really requested your opinion on the matter” i rolled my eyes and trailed my eyes down him, his grey henley and dark jeans fit him perfectly if anything maybe a tiny little too tight as i watched his shoulder blades through his shirt and sucked my bottom lip

“still i think it’s stupid, i mean whatcha gonna do? it’s basically a suicide quest” his head was turned a bit so i knew he was listening, his hands tighter on the palette in his hand

“perhaps if you had a smidge of faith in me it wouldn’t be a suicide mission but an act of valour.” he sounded mad. that was good, it meant my words were affecting him and he would rethink his decision

“faith or not what’re the odds yanno? i mean you were running from him for what was it?..oh yeah a thousand years!” that seemed to do something as he dropped any artsy stuff and spun round to face me, his eyes were cold and his expression was angry, offended but i kept up my ‘does it look like i give a fuck’ face and stared blankly at him. He eyed me for a minute, his eyes darting across my face to catch any expressions i could be hiding, i was nervous. but he didn’t seem to notice that at all and viewed me as purely arrogant

“look love, i’m not entirely sure why you seem to think your voice has any sort of importance but it doesn’t so unless you actually have something nice to say u suggest leaving” i rolled my eyes but didn’t move to leave

“so you only want me around when i’m kissing the ground you walk on? maybe you should go on the trip it might be a little quieter without you around smashing all of your shit every time you throw a temper tantrum” my voice got harsher, i watched the emotion swirl behind his eyes

“who do you think you are!?” he practically growled as he got closer to me, i stood from the chair so i could get out of the room just incase he went full rage mode

“i think i’m the only person in this home with a brain! especially now that Elijah’s gone its like talking to idiots” his eyes bled into gold and he took long strides towards me, i stepped backwards until i was flush against the wall, his face just above mine looking down at me and his hands either side of my head

“what the actual fuck is wrong with you! i have a plan! i know what i’m doing, i think i should how to survive after what was it? ah yes a thousand bloody years! you don’t get to sit there as though you are high and mighty, you’re weak and pathetic, you are nothing so how daw you come here, insult me to my face and try to change the trip I’m about to take! it’s not a fucking holiday y/n! i know it’s dangerous but i’m doing it to save my oh so wonderful brother!” his chest was heaving as he huffed in face

“and what about you! Elijah’s going to be too weak to come back and save you if Mikael gets you and what if just murders you on the spot? You know that he would! Rebekah and Hayley are going to be too busy with your stupid brother to come back for you and i can’t do shit as i’m so fucking weak and pathetic! you’re going to die klaus, die!” tears slipped down my face despite trying to fight them back and i avoided his eyes suddenly finding the wall opposite much more interesting

“i’m not going to die y/n, you know that i wouldn’t let that happen i have to come back to my incompetent siblings and my daughter and you” i sniffed and shrugged

“you can’t just expect to walk out of every scenario untouched, you’ve faced your father before, you personally have told me literal horror stories of Mikael, i don’t want you near him” his hand came up to hold my jaw as i slowly looked back at him

“i’ll be right back, i can give you my word on that” i shook my head and let the tears fully stream

“i don’t want to lose you” i whispered, my voice breaking at the end

“i’m not leaving” he whispered back and went to kiss my cheek but i turned my head a little and caught his lips with mine, it was only a peck as he pulled away with a surprised look on his face and i gulped in the fear of his rejection. He hesitated before pressing his mouth back against mine, i brought my hand up to the back of his hand and pulled his closer as i pushed my tongue between his lips and poured my every emotion into this kiss, he reciprocated my passion and cupped both my cheeks.

We slowly parted, i kept him close and pulled his head down to rest our foreheads against each others

“please don’t do something stupid, i love you too much for you to die, it’s not fair” i mumbled with my eyes still closed, his thumbs caressed my skin and he gave me another small kiss

“we’ll think of a different plan okay? you come with me and lets talk to the others yeah?” i stilled when he didn’t say it back and tears filled my eyes once more

“right…yeah okay” i whispered and dropped my hands from his hair

“y/n?”

“mhm?”

“i do love you…i have for ages i thought you knew that” i breathed a laugh and shook my head

“you think if i knew that i might’ve done something sooner?” he smiled and chuckled before kissing my head

“i figured you were holding out on me love”

[the-oblivious-writer]

first and foremost, I want to say I greatly admire your passion and resilience. I think it's very powerful how vocal you are about the things you care about, and I am in no way telling you to stop spreading awareness.

the truth of the matter is people are dying. I am in support of Palestine; what Israel is doing is disgusting and inhumane. the occupation and withdrawal of resources within the Gaza Strip are sick, and I have no words for the people affected because I will never truly understand.

all of that being said, all of this talk and evidence of dior being a zionist is also sickening. I don't think we are using her age as a "lame excuse" for her actions, but I believe her age and maturity level play a part in this and a significant one at that.

Dior is a child; this is a fact. children are bound to make mistakes. I'm not saying that as a loophole to forgiveness; I'm saying we should allow her the time to educate herself and mature so she can speak about these things from an informed perspective. (if she does educate herself and chooses to hold an opinion that you disagree with, you obviously in no way have to support her, and I hope you stay true to your morals and make the decision right for you.)

From an outside perspective, she was uninformed when she made those posts, given she took them down immediately. You are not entitled to forgive her for these actions, nor do I think you should.

you say neutrality feeds the oppressor, and I agree with that statement to an extent. I am pro-Palestine, and I can also acknowledge the death on the Israeli side of the argument. In a certain light, some people may call me neutral. We are all mature enough to collectively say this issue is wrong. the death, occupation, and bombing should not be happening.

at the end of the day, we are all human and bound to make mistakes. i am not saying you must or should forgive anyone for their actions if they offend you. I do believe everyone deserves a little grace and understanding, especially when they are uninformed.

I agree, everyone is bound to make mistakes, but I still feel like her age is not a great defense. From what I've seen in her posts (her posts in general) she seems like a very down to earth, aware, person. 17 is young, don't get me wrong, and sure she's a child but let's remember she's not 5. I know a lot of you may see me as unapologetic with the way I'm discussing this, it's just a genuine struggle for me to find even the littlest sympathy or grace for people in these situations

What I mean by "lame excuse" is that it honestly is, and I understand I may never change your mind on that but for me it's truly become tiring. It's so overused and I'm so sick of it. Something I've always said is a child's never gonna learn to not touch the stove unless they get burnt, again I know I seem unapologetic to some of you but try to understand where I'm coming from

The only thing I have against Dior personally is her stance in all this

I'm incredibly disappointed in her ...I'm allowed to be disappointed at a child, right?

[valeriianz]

Trope Game!

tagged by @tj-dragonblade @notallsandmen @virgo-dream thanks guys! <3 (ive been so bad at these lately, so im gonna pounce on this before i forget! lol)

Rules: How much do these tropes affect your decision to click on a fic?

-10 -> very dissuaded

0 -> don't care either way

10 -> very enticed

nope -> if it's a hard no and you'd never click on a fic with that tag or or you ever have the tag blocked or you'd insta click out of the fic if it wasn't tagged

Bonus points for explaining the rating and whether it's conditional.

Age Gap: 0, neither here nor there. i mean... if you think about it too hard, dreamling has quite the age gap, no? but if we're talking modern and human au? i usually only read (adult aged, like 20 years old being the youngest) age gap fics by authors i trust and never go looking for it myself. it's not something im into and seriously skeeves me out otherwise.

Codependency: 3? maybe? not something i ever explored before dreamling (and patrochiles). i do like my ships to be equally dependent. but it kinda works for some dreamling. again, not something i actively think about. but if im reading a fic and i slowly discover that's the relationship, it doesn't bother me (just don't make it infantile, ya know?)

Enemies to lovers: 10. love that shit.

Enemies with benefits: 0. never actually read a fic with this trope. idk how to feel about it.

Fake dating/relationship: 5. when it's done right im a sucker for it.

Found family: 7. as someone who has her own family issues and would rather spend holidays with my friends, im into it.

Friends to lovers: 9. its easy and delicious and always slaps.

Friends with benefits: 0 unless they fall in love at the end, then more like a 4. i do also like the angst potential.

Hurt/comfort: 5. it's okay. personally i feel like it's overplayed in dreamling and i tend to skip it these days.

Love triangle: nope.

Mistaken/hidden identity: 1... im curious to read it.

Monster fu... relationship: 10. yeah im shocked, too.

Obsession, possesiveness, etc.: 7. i have a dark side and it wants to be fed from time to time.

Opposites (lke grumpy x sunshine, etc): 5. like hurt/comfort, getting a little tired of it. its fun for a meme but nothing i particularly care for in my fics.

Poly: -5. ive read maaaybe a couple fics with poly but im not into it personally and mostly avoid it.

Pregnancy: nope.

Second chance: 7! i wrote a second chance fic lol there's such a lack of this trope in dreamling. i really enjoy it if done right.

Sex to feelings: 8. honestly i just love exploring any and all ways my ship can fall in love. that includes falling in lust first ;) (also it's like, always hot).

Slowburn: 8. it's agony. im addicted.

Soulmates: 0. something i really liked when i was a young fanfic consumer. now it kinda gives me the ick lol. it never makes sense in the modern world no matter how well thought out it is.

(also, i feel like these answers could change at any time. but this was fun to do, and to read what my friends are into!) tagging... @magnusbae @mathomhouse-e @beatnikfreakiswriting

[orionsangel86]

Trope Game

Thanks to @marlowe-zara for tagging me. This one looks like it could be both fun AND controversial lol!

Rules: How much do these tropes affect your decision to click on a fic?

• -10 -> very dissuaded

• 0 - don't care either way

• 10 -> very enticed

• nope -> if it's a hard no and you'd never click on a fic with that tag or or you even have the tag blocked or you'd insta click out of the fic if it wasn't tagged

Bonus points for explaining the rating and whether it's conditional.

Age Gap: -5 depending on context

If its human. If the age gap involves one party who is either a child, a teenager, or a young adult, and the other party is much older, then I'm not gonna read it. If its a Twilight situation where a 200 year old vampire is grooming a teenage girl, I'm not gonna read it. If however, it involves an immortal billions of year old character, who looks like an adult human, and their lover is a consenting adult human, then age gap is meaningless. (Aka Twilight wouldn't have been creepy if Bella was in her fucking twenties or older okay)

Codependency: 3

I mean I don't really care if it's a theme or not, but codependency tends to be a huge element in the canon for most of my ships - see Crowley x Aziraphale, Dean x Cas, Nandor x Guillermo. etc.

Enemies to lovers: 7

Yeah this is good. This is fun. We love a good enemies to lovers trope!

Enemies With Benefits: 6

Prob wouldn't read a long fic about it but an under 5k porny one shot hells yes!

Fake Dating/Relationship: 4

I used to enjoy this in Destiel fics specifically where it was canonverse and Dean and Cas had to pretend to be a couple for a case. I loved that. But outside of that specific ship and context, I dunno if I'm all that bothered. Depends on the summary and the general context.

Found Family: 8

So long as we aren't talking Avengers fanfiction lmao. It works really well for those certain fics where loneliness is clearly a contributing factor in the protagonists issues.

Friends to Lovers: 9

I mean, its basically my fave dynamic in canon so of course I'm gonna love it in fanfic.

Friends with Benefits: 3

I mean, I'm a romantic, so I prefer fanfics to at least hint towards the pairing developing more, so if the fic is clearly just a friends with benefits trope with no hints for possible future development I might be turned off. If its a trope as part of a wider story arc though I'm all for it (love those GOmens fics where they've secretly been friends with benefits for centuries but they are both idiots who are also madly in love with each other - ooh same for Dreamling actually)

Hurt/Comfort: 9

I eat that shit up. lol

Love Triangle: -5

I'm not gonna read it unless the summary is really compelling.

Mistaken/Hidden Identity: 0

Meh, it's unlikely to swing me either way unless there are other tropes included to entice or repell me.

Monster Fu... Relationship: 4

I don't mind it. But only in certain contexts. It's not my kink, but I'm all for Monster Fucker fics where the trope could realistically fit the pairing. (Dreamling does this well actually, It's the first pairing I've come across in a long time where I think it works because Dream is canonically quite monstrous when he wants to be.)

Obsession, Possessiveness, etc.: 0

depends on context, summary, and other tags. I'm not that interested in this trope either way on its own.

Opposites (like grumpy x sunshine, etc): 9

I can't help it i'm a slut for this trope. Just look at GOmens, look at OFMD - then again its more like aesthetic opposites than personality opposites. There has to be a "meeting in the middle" ultimately.

Poly: -3

Sorry, I'm a monogomous bitch and I like my ships to be the same way (except for those slutty slutty vampires actually)

Pregnancy: -9

Usually a hard nope. But I didn't give it a hard nope just BECAUSE there was that one Dreamling fic that I read which actually worked really well because it was technically a magical pregnancy that didn't include any actual biological childbirth, no one was actually pregnant, no ones body changed to accomodate a baby, and no one had to go through the process of physically pushing a baby out of their body. But yeah pregnancy and childbirth of the human kind are complete nopes for me. I will not read pregnancy fics - whether mpreg or regular preg or anything else. I don't wanna hear about pregnancy, or labour, or anything like that. its just a huge squick of mine.

Second Chance: 0

Meh. Its not gonna influence me either way

Sex to Feelings: 4

This is alright. Friends with benefits that develop feelings yeah? So like what I was saying above. But it was overused in romcoms in the early 2000s so Its gotta be compelling to pique my interest.

Slowburn: 6

I like it, but I like it when the pacing is decent. If its glacially slow I might get bored. If its slow burn because the fic is 600k words and they only get together in the last 10,000 words I'm likely to get annoyed with it. It's gotta be real good at keeping the story interesting, keeping the drama going, and keeping the sexual and romantic tension on point.

Soulmates: -8

I don't like it. This is all those soulmate AUs where it'll be something like "you are born with a tattoo of your soulmates name... etc" I dunno why it just doesn't compell me and I prefer stories where the characters come together despite the odds.

Tagging: @so-i-grudgingly-joined-this-site @tickldpnk8 @just-cosmere-fan @academicblorbo @notallsandmen and anyone else who wants to play. No pressure though!

[mongrel-mage]

Something that I wish I'd known about before starting testosterone was how differently I would feel socially. While I could talk about what happens now that I pass and whatnot, what I specifically mean is the emotional downsides of being perceived as male re: my relationship with other people. Growing up being socialized as female, I took for granted the amount of physical affection I was free to give and receive. I could greet my friends with a hug. We could lean against each other, link arms, hold hands, fix each other's hair or clothes or a hundred other little touches that nonetheless conveyed emotional closeness. There was so much platonic affection that I never thought about. It was the same with family members. I could hug them, cuddle against them, express the need for affection.

I almost never get hugged anymore, not unless I ask for it, and more often than not it is assumed that I'm only doing so because there is something wrong. I've had my grandparents ask me if it was still okay for them to hug me, to kiss me on the cheek. I don't feel like I can hug my friends as a greeting or a farewell for the fear of being seen as Less Of A Man. What used to be an oasis of human contact is now a void. Not only that, but think about how often women/femme people are able to compliment each other. "You're so pretty," "you look great," "love that color on you," and so many other things. When I presented as female, I was the recipient of compliments from friends, family, sometimes people I didn't even know. That hasn't happened a single time since I transitioned.

The only sort of emotional and physical affection a man is socially allowed to receive is from an intimate partner. Nobody else, or you're somehow Less Of A Man, you're perceived as gay, you're called any variety of shitty things.

Masculinity includes emotional starvation. There is a great post that I'll link that talks about this more eloquently than I can, and I want to give credit where it's due (will include a transcript below the cut).

Does this mean that I regret my decision to transition? Absolutely not. Does it mean that I wish I was still perceived as a woman? Hell no. But the potency of this loneliness took me by surprise, and I think that it's something that we need to talk about more.

[Tumblr user skaldish]: Still bothered by the US cultural idea that men can only be non-romantically intimate with one another in war-like or competitive circumstances.

[Tumblr user skaldish]: I'm pretty quiet about the fact that I'm a transman usually, but holy shit I need to tell you about the culture shock I'm going through because it's blindsiding me.

There's a huge sense of social isolation that comes with being perceived as male, because now people are subconsciously treating me as a potential predator. All strangers, no matter their gender, keep their guard up around me.

It made me realize that there is no inherent camaraderie in male socialization as there is in female socialization--unless, of course, it's in very specific environments. And the fact that I don't amnbiently experience this mutual kinship in basic exchanges anymore is an insanely lonely feeling.

You know how badly this would have fucked up my mind if I had grown up with this?

[Tumblr user skaldish]: It's 4:30 am and I'm mourning the loss of a privilege I didn't even know I had.

[Tumblr user skaldish]: Anyway, I'm going to figure out how to navigate this. Don't know how yet, but I'm gonna.

[Tumblr user azaloset, in a comment]: If you figure it out, can you share your insights? This is a fundamental as to why I'm in the closet.

[Tumblr user skaldish]: Absolutely, because it's an extremely sticky issue.

Frankly, this is something I would've never understood without living the experience.

It's now blatantly clear to me that most cis men probably experience chronic emotional malnutrition. They're deprived of social connection just enough for it to seriously fuck with their psyches, but not enough for them to realize it's happening and what's causing it.

It's like they're starving, but don't know this because they've always been served 3 square meals...except those meals have never been big enough.

This deprivation comes from all sides of the aisle, by the way.

In the case of women: When I'm out in public and interact with women, all of them come across as incredibly aloof, cold, and mirthless. I have never experienced this before even though I know exactly what this composure is--the armor that keeps away creepy-ass men.

As someone who used to wear it myself, I know this armor is 100% impersonal. Nobody likes wearing it, and I can say with absolute certainty that women would dump the armor in favor of unconditional companionship with men if doing this didn't run the risk of actual assault. (Trust me when I say women aren't just being needlessly guarded).

But I only have a complete understanding of this context because I've experienced female socialization. If I hadn't, I would've thought this coldness was a conspiracy against me devised by roughly half of the human population. Even now, with all that I know about navigating the world as a woman, I'm failing to convince my monkey-brain that this armor isn't social rejection.

And as for male socialization? Again, it seems taboo for a ma to be platonically intimate with men for reasons I have yet to fully understand, but I think it boils down to a) the fact society teaches boys that it's not okay to be soft with one another, and b) garden-variety homophobia. Our media only shows men being intimate with one another when they're teamed up against a dire situation, and I'd bet real money it's a huge reason why men gravitate toward activities that simulate being teamed up against an opposing force.

But men are not machines of war. Yes, testosterone absolutely gives you Dumb Bastard Brain, but that just makes you want to skateboard a wagon down a hill or duct-tape your friend to the wall, not kill someone.

The human species looks so much colder standing from this side.

I can see how men might convince themselves that their feelings of emotional desperation is personal weakness as opposed to a symptom they're all experiencing from White Imperialism. Because this human connection, this frith, is as essential for our wellbeing as water is.

So sick. How sick. I want to destroy this garbage.

[teaandinanity]

Tropes Game

Rules

How much do these tropes affect your decision to click on a fic?

-10 → very dissuaded 0 → don’t care either way 10 →  very enticed nope → if it’s a hard no and you’d never click on a fic with that tag or or you even have the tag blocked or you’d insta click out of the fic if it wasn’t tagged.

Bonus points for explaining the rating and whether it’s conditional.

yoinked from bendingsignpost because I went OwO and placed under a cut because it wasn’t short to start with and as per usual I have talked way too much

TROPES:

Age gap: I'm gonna give this a 5 in favor because I am HUGELY into mayfly-december romance and the normal flavor of age gap usually won't send me screaming into the hills unless there's other factors (and tags) sending it spelunking into squicksville.

Codependency: 5 in favor when it is unhinged fantasy soulmates shit. I also really enjoy fiction where characters have matching baggage and trauma that interlocks. If it's set in the real world this gets creepy very quickly.

Enemies to lovers: 5 again because I like it when it's done in a specific way - where there's plenty of interaction and respect before any feelings crop up and once they do one or both parties are enraged about it - but I so often see this as allo bullshit where I just want to scream 'STOP KISSING HIM HE'S A FUCKING REPUBLICAN.'

Enemies with benefits: -10, I am insufficiently allo for this.

Fake dating/relationship: 1. This tag by itself is like a sprinkle of pepper. It's nice but I'm not ordering dinner based on that.

Found family: 5. I quite like it but I will generally not read things purely on the strength of this tag.

Friends to lovers: This depends ENTIRELY on the characters in question. My default for this is honestly probably like -3 in isolation but a friend and I have OCs who fit this (hi Tina!) and that is like 10/10 A+ love it EXACTLY my shit. Obviously. Since OCs. Anyway if there's a bunch of hesitation to take the step because of course they love you but do they LOVE you and speaking up will change things and what if it's not GOOD change and-- that's the good stuff. I just want characters to suffer and this is often too simple and fluffy for me.

Friends with benefits: -10 unless it's paired with one-sided or mutual pining. I am not allo enough for this.

Hurt/comfort: 10. Gimme. Make 'em earn that happy ending. Make the stoic ones display vulnerability and I will be fully helmo.gif about it.

Love triangle: -10. Hate it. HATE. I actually skipped one of my fave fics in one of the fandoms I'm in for Literal Months because it had two pairings tagged for the PoV character and I was like 'absolutely the fuck not' until friends told me 'no really you'll like it it's not A Triangle.'

Mistaken/hidden identity: 7 I think? Not an automatic read but I do enjoy it substantially.

Monster-fucking relationship: 9 hell yeah like I'm into monster-fucking but then you add RELATIONSHIP where they probably have misunderstandings and feels? Yes absolutely.

Obsession, possessiveness, etc.: 10, as long as it's not presented as normal and fluffy. Like. Healthy people don't do this. It's just that I do not want characters to be healthy I want them to be INTERESTING and obsessed with each other.

Opposites (like grumpy×sunshine, etc): 5 I guess? But it definitely gets a multiplier if they Get Each Other better than anyone else in spite of that surface opposites thing.

Poly: Varies wildly. If I'm really into the characters individually and also their dynamics as a group, this can be a major plus - like, there have absolutely been things I've read where I was like 'WHY are you two getting het married when Character C is right there and you both have two hands' - but at the same time I hate love triangles and all other affection geometry so this is not a COMMON experience. More typically, I am here for my OTP and in that case this can make it down to Nope. It's very hard to figure out what this tag would be in isolation because it's SO heavily dependent on other factors!

Pregnancy: This can honestly run the gamut from Nope to +5, because I have read it and thought it was sweet and read it and thought it was hot and irl the idea of being pregnant makes me want to give myself a DIY hysterectomy. So yeah.

Second chance: -8. This is not a Noope but it is a hard sell. I've skipped fics I wound up really liking due to a 'getting back together' tag. I think one of them I skipped more than five times in sort-by-kudos and then other people's bookmarks and browsing the author's works (because I loved their other fic) before I finally said 'FINE I will try the green eggs and ham.'

Sex to feelings: Normally? -10 or a hard Nope. If one of them is pining and the other is an oblivious moron who just doesn't KNOW they're pining yet? That's excellent and I will eat it with a spoon directly out of the carton. But like. I am not allo enough for this without feelings. SOMEONE better be having them or I'm gonna back right out of that.

Slow burn: 10, yes please, give me Yearning.

Soulmates: I'm gonna give this like an 8 because I LOVE it in theory but I have also seen it done badly (as a shortcut that removes the need for buildup or communication of any kind, for example) like. A lot.

Arranged marriage: There's a range but this probably averages out to like -2. Mostly because as an aro-ace person this sounds like a horror movie and even if the rest of the tags pinky promise it's gonna be soft and end happily part of my hindbrain does not believe them and is just facing the sky to more fully unhinge its jaw and shriek, AAAAAAH!

[pixelkip]

Ok serious post time. I don't like making posts like this but it's kind of a few months coming.

Hey guys so. I might start posting most of my hazy stuff exclusively to tumblr as much as I hate to say it. This isn't for sure that I'm never interacting there again but. Probably not touching it mostly

Just 1 or 2 people in the discord community I feel like. Mega fucking uncomfortable around for stuff that, while it's been mostly resolved I guess, still was super upsetting at the time and has caused me a lot of anxiety seeing them around again to the point of it being a serious detriment to my mental health.

Especially cause hazy river is still kind of a big hyperfixation to me and has honestly affected me so much. I'm deeply attached to it and that's not changing. That discord community too has been a huge part of my life for over a year now and I wish I didn't feel like I had to stop interacting with it for the sake of my own health, but it's becoming increasingly obvious that I do.

The thing is I don't WANT to care that someone who makes me uncomfortable is back in a space I'm in. I'd rather just accept it and ignore it and continue interacting there as normal. That's what I've been telling myself is the mature thing to do and its what ive been trying to do for a while. But my anxiety doesn't seem to agree on that front. Not just in a "ew I don't like them" way but in a causing me actual panic attacks way.

I'm very open to anyone asking what this is about and why i feel like this, I'd be glad to tell you IN TUMBLR/DISCORD DMS NOT PUBLICLY, but I wanna say a few things first

-youre free to do with this information what you wish, but I take no responsibility for anything YOU do with what I tell you.

- preferably don't start drama PLEASE. If you know who im talking about or if you even think you know, don't. Start. shit. Even if you ask me and I tell you. Don't. Start. Shit.

- UNLESS you have a good reason like theyre actively doing something shitty, don't put anyone this is about/might be about on blast publicly. I would prefer people truly learn from their mistakes. And if that somehow does happen, idfk take it up with that community's mods

- I'm not shaming anyone who is friends with or interacts with anyone I'm referring to. As long as you don't cross my boundaries, and you dont encourage/defend what they did if I tell you, and you dont try to let them contact me, or generally try to get them involved with me I don't care.

- don't contact anyone else that might be involved about it either. I might be ok telling people how I feel about this but others might not. I don't wanna be the reason anyone gets pestered over something shitty that happened to them.

- if you are reading this on my tumblr dot com, I assure you it's almost definitely not you I'm talking about whose the reason I'm making this decision.

Ok finally here's the part where I'm gonna be pretty blunt:

If you do contact me cause you wanna know why I feel this way, I apologize in advance if it makes you uncomfortable around someone you may have interacted with. Cause if you ask, I'm telling you. No sugar coating, no "but it's ok" for any reason. Me still not fully having healed over what happened doesnt mean i wish anyone involved any ill will. But I'm not gonna pretend I wanna be amicable or friendly with or even forgive who did this either. Wanting to move on =/= forgiving. If you insist on defending what they did while I'm actively telling you why it hurt me, that's just rude. And I will probably block you.

Block button is at the ready and I claim 0 responsibility for hurt feelings or possibly viewing ur mutual differently as a result.

TLDR: I'm probably fucking off from most of hazy discord bc I'm deeply uncomfy around someone who came back there some time ago, feel free to dm me and ask about it cause telling people why honestly makes me feel less alone about it, but please please don't start drama and don't think I'm responsible for anything that happens as a result of me telling you what someone did that caused me a lot of pain.

Sorry for the long serious post, I'm hoping to be able to do more fun stuff in the future.

In the wise words of the queen ass 2 over herself, thank you (for listening) and I love you.

[yanderelovlies]

✨Galaxy Anon ✨ here!

*sees requests are open and slams hand down* Vivi! I want a order of that one prompt that I made that time of reader in love with Joseph and Joseph dates them only for reader to find out Joseph only done it for peer pressure, reader saves him and dies, reader recarnted and Jack appears through tape and tries to win reader love but reader knows it’s Joseph and refuses. Optional if Jack finds out later or when they meet reader again immediately if he finds out reader old identity years from years ago when he was Joseph. Angst and Fluff endings included. * fixes table* sorry for the rash action it’s just a rare opportunity for me. But take your time on this one I know it’s a long one. That’s also why you don’t have ten requests from me right now lol.

Vivi don’t make me cry! You’re gonna make me cry waterfalls!

Yeah I felt the same, I felt there was something maybe it lacked but nothing to that degree that it had a fucking hashtag. I hope so too and we gotta respect sauce decision not to go after those people since they don’t want that and wants to leave it behind.

Pfft that would’ve scared me since unless they looked and acted so good and sweet I wouldn’t ask since I be petrified to seem stupid.

Makes sense, old habits die hard and I’m living proof of that. Happy to make your goal achieved!

I felt more it was like I couldn’t talk to my mom about it and I was very naive so I wondered what happens on social media and I got into my first serious phase fandom that time and wanted to talk to people about it. Yeah I made some mistakes and glad they never truly bit me in the butt to this day though it could’ve have easily been otherwise. Same we both swimming in our tanks, with horrible memory that fails us.

Oh yeah, I heard of those friendships. They sound bad and unfortunately knowing how long you been friends for until breaking it off yeah I can see why it take a toll on you. Yeah I’m glad you rejected it though you need to stay away if they’re affecting you that badly. I can feel you on friend trouble just I was the expendable one. It felt more like I was an outsider looking into a group of friends rather than my own. It really affected me later in life and why I was so scared and even clingy to people I made friends with online since I was scared to be forgotten. Vivi you’re making me blush awww!

Galaxy my love you can send as many as you would like I don't mind 💕 I'm having a bit of writer's block, and seeing everyone's prompts really help me 💕

Would you like some hugs?? I love giving hugs 💜.

IT HAD A HASHTAG?! THE FUCK?? I don't like that at all. Aaahhh poor Sauce! Criticism is one thing, but to make a hashing??

She was one of that cool teachers who was strict when she needed to be, but most times she didn't care as long as your work was done.

Oh trust me too. 💕💕

Young me took advantage of the that I didn't have parents around. Along with my older siblings being bad influences. I saw things a child shouldn't have, and other unfun things. It never bit me too hard, but it did leave an impact. Also it's a good thing we have a spacious bowl! .....I think.

I know that feeling too well. When we got out of high school we had plans to move in together, but thanks to bad decisions I had difficulties getting a job to help pay for it. So without talking to me they got the apartment,and moved one of their brothers into my place. After that it never felt like I was their friend anymore. I was just watching them have fun. I have to remind myself that people don't wanna talk to me 24/7. I haven't balanced it out yet but I'm getting there. Being forgotten is my second biggest fear. It gives me panic attacks.

I'm only telling the truth 💕

[khaleesiofalicante]

Okay now on to more thoughts. The situation with the kids is really screwed up. Because they seem to take sides. I mean Arthur full on takes David's side and doesn't want to go with Max and Lance does the same thing and I really believe that Max and David need to sit them down and explain that there are no sides. That they are both their parents and that they love them and care for them and they can't snap at either one of them. But I feel like they can't. Because Max believes that David hates him and David thinks that Max hates him. They have a very wrong impression of what the other feels or is going through and I feel like that's a huge obstacle to them being better co parents. ( I mean Max is basically missing a vital part that Malec is hiding).They don't communicate with each other and that's really messing up with the kids. Also, I need Lance and David ( and Arthur and Max) to have a Rafael/Alec and a Magnus/Max in TLND moment where they listen and explain and talk openly and get over whatever issues there are. They really need to do this for the kids. I mean, Max and David should also have a moment like that but that's just reaching for too much(unless it isn't??). And I really really hope Rafael don't know what Malec is hiding, please let Max at least have one support system! Speaking of support systems I can't wait to hear Jackson's opinion on everything that's happening and how he advises David. That should be really interesting. Last thought! I wish Lance would talk with Max about his fears, so Max can reassure him that he loves him more than life itself and he could never hate him(same with David, hope he throws that in too).

Okay, this chapter was great, it once again broke me, you are super talented and I hope you are taking breaks ma'am you've posted a lot chapters this week. We love to see it but take care of yourself!

the situation with the kids is a little (but not a lot) similar to TLND. for example, in TLND the issues was they over relied on the kids (Rafe) and fucked up their perception of love (Max).

The issues Arthur and Lance are dealing with is different. While Lance seems to have issues with acceptance from Max, the divorce didn't much impact AJ since he was too small. But we now see the post-divorce clusterfuck and the secrets and everything affecting everyone tbh.

I really want TLND type chats and closure in IALS too. But it doesn't fit this universe. It's not something they've ever done. In TLND, they had a family dynamic that got disrupted. So they just had to find themselves back to that - or build a new one.

in ials, mavid and the kids didn't actually get to be a family for a long time. they don't have dynamics. so they are all over the place. and figuring it out will be harder. and of course the 'not talking' bit doesn't help.

All this time max and david focused on the physical and social needs of the children. but now that they're older and are starting to make their own decisions, mavid will soon realize an intervention is necessary :)

And yay we're gonna finally see Jackson in the present timeline in the next chapter!! we might get some answers and context from him <3

and yes Lance TALK TO YOUR DAD.

[casspurrjoybell-17]

Hart and Hunter - Chapter 20 - Part 2

*Warning Adult Content*

Julian Hart

Next, I head down the street to Craft Essentials, where Danni Spelling welcomes me with a bright smile and a hand sign I used to associate with punks and rock concerts but which I've since learned represents the Horned God and is a used as a greeting between witches. 

"Julian. Blessed be." 

Danni is in their mid-thirties, has pale skin and closely shaved dark hair, is petite and pixie-like and gets mis-gendered so often they rarely bother correcting people even when they wear a shirt declaring their pronouns across the colors of the nonbinary flag. 

"Hi, Danni. How's the, uh... spell-craft business going?"

I glance around at the shelves stocked with tiny bottles of essential oils, colorful handmade soaps, scented candles, dried herbs, crystals, books and various other items and wonder if my question is insensitive.

The few customers I've seen in Danni's shop haven't seemed like big spenders. 

"Great," Danni exclaims.

"Ninety percent of my business is online, actually. The store is just a place to keep it all and make a few extra bucks on the side." 

As I glance around the shop again, it makes sense. Everything is arranged to make it easy to locate and identify and the labels include information like the item's inventory number and color, presumably to reduce the chance Danni would send the wrong one by mistake. 

At the moment, they're sorting small polished gemstones into neat little baskets on a table, arranged by color and size.

"So, what can I do for you?" Danni asks.

"You need a spell-kit or a candle? Something for focus and insight or clearing the mind? You got a big decision ahead of you, I think." 

Taken aback, I fail to hide my surprise and Danni laughs. 

"I'm psychic, like you, remember? I told you, I see auras." 

Danni had told me that, I recall but I hadn't believed them. 

They gesture at me.

"Your aura is all... swirly and agitated. 'Big decision' was just a guess based on what I've seen before. Am I right?" 

"Yeah. I already made it, though," I say, thinking of the land-bond and Danni grins cheekily.

"Maybe that's what you've told yourself but your aura says otherwise. So, not to be nosy but what is it? You finally gonna put a ring on that man of yours and tie him down?" 

I blink.

Whether their ability is real or not, Danni is certainly insightful. 

"Something like that," I say, smiling.

"But I'm actually here for another reason." 

Danni turns back to the table and continues sorting gems.

"Yeah, I figured. The cops were here earlier, asking all kinds of questions about the building, my relationship with Jeff... all that jazz." 

"What happened recently?" 

"I don't know. Like I told that dweeby detective... Halloran or whatever his name is... I hardly saw Jeff in the last few weeks before he died. I went over to talk to him about a new marketing strategy and he acted like he didn't know me. Then I saw him spending an awful lot of time next door with Steph and I figured maybe I didn't know him as well as I'd thought I did, either." 

"Lagrange was hanging out with Stephanie Wong?" 

Danni nods.

"Only recently, though. I honestly thought he didn't like her."

I frown as I infer two things. 

First, that Halloran is still using his glamour to affect how he's perceived and second, that he hasn't been completely forthcoming with the information.

Unless he just hasn't had the chance to pass the intel along.

"You told the cops all that this morning?" I ask. 

"Yeah and when they interviewed me at the station and right after Jeff died. Is it important?" 

"I don't know," I say, which is the truth.

"Hey, I know this is probably the last thing you want to do right now but would you mind telling me what you told the police? As much as you can remember?" 

Danni casts me a sly, sidelong look.

"While you're waiting for me to make you up that spell-kit, you mean?" 

I laugh.

"Sounds like a deal." 

As Danni selects various items from the shelves, wraps them carefully and packs them into a small cloth pouch, they recount their conversations with detectives Vasquez and Halloran while I take careful notes on my phone.

Most of it Dane and I already know but a few choice tidbits are new.

The revelation that Lagrange... or rather the skin-changer that had taken his place... had been friendly with Wong remains the most interesting point, however, and puts Stephanie at the top of my suspect list. 

With their story concluded, Danni puts the finishing touches on the spell-kit. 

"Okay... now a gem for you to concentrate on and ground your energies. Let's see..."

They take a step back and look me up and down.

"Amethyst. That's definitely your stone." 

"Oh, really?" I roll my eyes and laugh.

"Who'd have guessed?" 

"What do you mean?" Danni asks, sounding perplexed.

I point at my eyes.

"Are you color-blind?" 

Danni's expression flickers.

"Actually... yeah, I am. That's why I label everything so carefully." 

Mortified by my thoughtlessness, I roast in the instant broil of embarrassment.

"Shit. I'm so sorry. I didn't even think..." 

Danni laughs.

"Dude, relax. It's okay. People don't know unless I tell them." 

"Still, I shouldn't have assumed..." 

Danni waves dismissively.

"Don't worry about it. Anyway, what's with your eyes? They're not blue?" 

"No.... they're purple... like a bright, obvious purple." 

"Wow," Danni exclaims, leaning closer, their own eyes wide as they peer at mine.

"That's super rare, right? I can't see the red part of purple, so it just looks like blue to me." 

"So," I ask, my curiosity overcoming my mortification at last.

"If you didn't know I had purple eyes, why'd you say amethyst was my stone?" 

"Just something in your aura," Danni says.

"I thought auras were... um... colorful," I say and wince but Danni only smiles.

"So much of our language and communication is vision-based. Most people think if you're psychic, it means you 'see' things. You and I know better, right?" 

"Yeah," I agree.

"I mostly feel stuff... emotions, sensations, that sort of thing." 

Danni nods.

"It's the same for me. I may not 'see' colors but I feel them. When I look at you, I feel purple. 'Purple' is an in-between color. It can mean a perfect blend of things or it can signify the state of being caught between two options... uncertainty, a big decision. That sort of thing. When I look at you, I sense the latter kind of purple." 

They place the stone they'd selected for me and a card with instructions in the bag and tie it shut with a bit of hemp string before handing it over. 

"So, there you go... a spell for insight and clarity."

 Suitably impressed, I take it and fish out my wallet.

"What do I owe you?" 

"Nothing," Danni rests a hand on my arm and smiles.

"It's a gift. Just let me know how it goes." 

I thank them and prepare to leave, when a new thought strikes me and I turn back. 

"Hey, when you went to visit Jeffrey and he acted strange, did his... er... 'aura' look any different to you?" 

Danni nods.

"Yes, actually. Jeff's energy was always steady and settled... like a river in an old course. He knew what worked for him and he stuck to it. The last time I talked to him, he was all..."

Danni scrunches their face and waves a hand.

"I don't know. I'd almost say frightened. He was all over the map." 

"Did you tell the police that?" 

"I mean... I mentioned he seemed different but I didn't get into the psychic angle. You know how cops are." 

"You'd be surprised," I say.

"Some are pretty open-minded. Anyway, this might sound strange but if you notice anyone else whose aura suddenly changes, could you let us know?" 

I hand over a business card and Danni takes it with a nod.

"Sure. I can do that."

Spell-kit in hand, I take my leave and walk back down the street towards to my car, where I see that Stephanie's shop is still closed.

I consider calling Halloran... telling him of my new suspicions and asking for his help... but I decide against it.

If Danni told him everything they told me, then he already knows. 

I sit in my car a while longer, hoping that Stephanie will show but after thirty minutes, I get hungry and bored and then it's time to pick Ingrid up from the college.

At home, I find Dane on the phone.

He's deeply absorbed in something, taking careful notes and after eavesdropping for a few minutes I gather he's talking to his mom about the land-bonding ritual.

I give him some privacy and help Ingrid carry Charlie the Cello over to Chloe and Grace's for her daily practice session. 

Later, over dinner, Dane and Ingrid talk about wolf things and entertain me with stories from their childhoods.

Seeing Dane relaxed and laughing is a nice change and I don't want to bring down the mood, so I don't mention the information I'd gleaned from Danni.

Tomorrow will be soon enough to discuss the case.  

With dinner concluded, Dane and Ingrid head out for a Run and Dane tells me not to wait up.

As part of the lead-up to the ritual, he needs to patrol the borders of the land he intends to claim every night and it will take a while. 

In the meantime, I catch up on some reading, do some adulting I've been putting off and eventually go to bed. 

Sometime later, I feel the bed dip and move over to make room for Dane.

When he crawls right over me, I mumble an objection and try to push him off.

As horny as I can be, I'm not actually always in the mood.

Rather than comply, though, he grabs my wrist in a vise-like grip and pins me to the bed, which is when it finally gets through my sleep-addled brain that the person on top of me is not, in fact, Dane. 

At which point, I awaken and stare up into a pair of bright purple eyes.

[huhhugh]

Ok, so I see alot of horseshit in the fucking notes of this post and let me just say, although this movie was quite well executed, ultimately the story is that ken was neglected and ignored by literally everyone around him and snapped before getting told to shut up and go back being stomped on, let's elaborate shall we?

In the beginning of the movie it is explicitly stated that "ken only has a good day when Barbie looks at him" and you could, if this were the real world, say that he was basing his life around Barbie to an unhealthy degree, but this isn't set in the real world it's set in Barbieland, a place where ken was made to serve functionally the same purpose as a tote bag, he is an accessory to Barbie by design so I would say he is basing his life around her as much as he was made to, but that she doesn't care about him, at all, not even as a friend (because I think alot of people see this as ken being mad about friendzoning) but the thing is you would not treat friends like she treats ken, for instance take a second to flip the roles of Barbie and ken throughout the movie, and suddenly it's super misogynist, and of course you could say that we only have one day to look at in Barbieland but the things we see are called out to be normal if not constant so I would say it's fair to call it a representative sample, ken is ignored and belittled constantly when he just wants to hang out with someone who, supposedly, enjoys his company (y'know like friends do) but Barbie is constantly patronising to him at every turn she thinks he is lesser and you see it in her every action, and as the movie moves into the real world segment we see her getting harassed instantly which, would not happen realistically because it isn't socially acceptable anymore and you would get in trouble for it, at most you would get quiet leering which while uncomfortable I can say as a woman myself doesn't even make top fucking 25 of my biggest problems that I experience, and frankly if being leered at is your biggest problem I'm putting you into one of two boxes either

A. Leering is triggering to you due to past sexual assault

B. Leering is a big problem simply because it makes you uncomfortable

And if it's A, valid you're chill, but if it's B, go fuck yourself if it makes you scared get stronger I'm sick and fucking tired of people just waiting to be helped, people don't help unless it's convenient, it's the sad truth so if you want something done, if you want to feel protected, protect. Your. Self. And yes this may not work for everyone and yes, I am, functionally telling you to get PTSD and move on but you don't get to look at me, an autistic trans woman with PTSD and DID and say people making creepy comments is The Big Problem Of Society, but I digress. Now let's move forwards a bit to where they get back and ken rules barbieland so lemme start with mojo dojo Casa house is in fact fun to say and I'm sorry you hate having a good time and he does in fact look neat and I am, once again, sorry you hate having a good time, and he specifically says something to the affect of (although I forget the specific wording) 'oh it sucks when it's you huh' because this is how ken was treated, he was the one begging for attention just to feel like he had worth and he was the one who is heavily implied to NOT HAVE A FUCKING HOUSE in the Barbie dream world, and when the Barbie's are being un-brainwashed they talk about various societal expectations (that I will add aren't exclusive to women but I'll elaborate in a bit) that they 'have' to confirm to, but the thing is yeah, it sucks and you end up on the outs but you can in fact break them and live, and I know this because I think all societal norms can go die in a fucking hole regardless of who they're about, if you abide by societal norms that hurt you that is decision you are making and I'm not gonna say that anyone but you is taking your agency. And the societal expectations for men are equally strict, men are (if they want to be considered 'good') expected to be emotionally available but not clingy, and open but not expecting help, supportive and feminist but not subservient, strong but not angry, and there are others but they slip my mind, social norms hurt everyone and, like any good ruling class seek to make everyone think it is everyone else's faults so they can't take a second to take down the actual architect of their suffering, and let me also say the ending where he was crying, if you listen you can hear the Barbie's making sounds of disgust as he goes to cry which let me just say, GO FUCK YOURSELVES, do you how goddamned often the message that '''boys don't cry''' is perpetuated??? FUCKING CONSTANTLY. And then Barbie is so goddamned condescending the whole time she's talking to him up there, its fucking nausea inducing, once again, take one goddamned second to switch the genders in this movie you goddamned blind assholes, and this isn't even touching on how, when you take the way they treat/talk about weird Barbie combined with how they treat/talk about ken shows that they just want conformity, the Barbie's are absolutely the fucking villains of the movie, and the moral the movie perpetuates is that there will always be an abusive power structure but hey, at least you can be top dog now.

In summary ken deserves better than he got, the only good Barbie is weird Barbie, and the true villain everywhere is gender essentialism and idealized normalcy being used to crush those who don't fit.

note: this take actually adresses some sensitive topics, including some that i didn't know how to tag, but may require content warnings - so just be careful

also, i had to post this early because for some reason tumblr kept deleting this specific post every time it was queued or saved as a draft

HOT TAKE TOURNAMENT

TOURNAMENT OVERTIME #182

Submission 527

the Barbie movie (2023) was horrible

[SUBMITTED JUSTIFICATION UNDER THE CUT - PLEASE READ]

Propaganda is encouraged!

Also, remember to reblog your favourite polls for exposure!

Submitted justification:

unfortunately this is a dead serious take of mine. that movie was a story of a horrible tragedy portrayed as justice. and the subtle violent radfem undertones were deeply uncomfortable. my reasons for disliking it are very complicated and personal, so I'm going to try and keep this brief and try to avoid saying anything too charged.

i understand liking it— it was a very fun movie! the way they did the practical effects and props and setting were all genius and very cool!

but.. the way they handled Ken and his struggles felt extremely minimizing, cruel, and violent. I've *been* the reject kid before. I *know* what that's like. I've been humiliated and degraded before for being too much, for having ADHD, for being autistic, for wanting to be included in friend groups that didn't want me.

ken's story is a *tragedy* of a person who dared to ask for love and inclusion, who dared to ask over and over until the only option left to him was to be made into a villain for it. and instead of realizing that maybe, just maybe, this was a cry for help... that maybe, this was the last straw in a long long long line of instances of horribly cruel social bullying and humiliation.... that maybe Ken never wanted to hurt anyone, that maybe he just wanted everyone to see how much he was hurting, that maybe he never wanted power or violence, but empathy instead.... instead of considering any of at, the movie has Barbie and her friends *laugh* at his suffering, and watch him on the brink of tears with the grim satisfaction of a bully that got away with it.

i came away from this movie thinking, what should Ken have done better to avoid this? what could he have done to be truly accepted? what was the "good" choice, if what he actually chose was actually so evil?

and the answer is, nothing. he was spending his entire life serving and worshipping a group that wanted him quiet, polite, and dead. from personal experience, this is the kind of friend group that would probably find it at best a personal irritant, if he had attempted suicide.

this movie was so hurtful. it really felt like they said "people like you are better off dead or behaving like perfect mindless dolls, because when you try to get what you want, you just bother the people around you." conform or else.

i know people get icky when people claim that misandry exists, but.... consider the plot of this same movie, if ken had been one of barbie's girl friends. or if ken had been a trans girl. or hell, even a trans girl egg. i just see people only praising this movie and... no one seems to acknowledge how unnecessarily, brutally cruel they were to Ken, and how little empathy he received both from the general audience and from the writers and Barbie herself.