#like this years surprisingly was better than last years but like i spent it alone in the psych hospital so it very much still was BAD lmao

[fmle-drven]

Till death do us part

Simon Riley x F!reader

You and Simon tie the knot, and what better fashion than a gothic cathedral

Kinda dragged off towards the end. I lost inspiration lmao

The day is here. The day you finally marry the love of your life. The day you become Mrs, Simon Riley.

You and Simon didn’t have the most romantic story by any means. You met Simon at a pub one night. He and his team were celebrating a highly successful mission and you. Well, you were sitting alone at the end of the bar after an extremely devastating day. Your long term boyfriend had broken up with you and you had lost your job.

You twirled your drink with the straw and stared at the liquid creating a tornado. Deep in thought, your eyes swollen from the tears shed throughout the day. You were 3 shots deep, and 2 margaritas in when you hear the blokes laughing and cheering from the other end of the bar. Looking up from your drink, the room vibrated a little bit while you stared at the bunch. You must have not known how long you were staring, but definitely long enough for one of them to walk over to you.

“May I buy you another drink miss?” The man asked.

You slowly drew your eyes from his feet ALL the way up to his masked face. Your eyes widened at the mountain standing before you. Your mouth gaped open but you quickly snap out of it. Your eyes narrow in on his as it’s the only thing you can see.

“I’m good” you say sharply as you swivel back around to your drink.

“The names ghost.” He continues, holding out a hand to greet himself.

“I said….. I’m…….. good.” You repeat through gritted teeth. You did not want any man to even look at you, let alone talk to you. You wanted to be left in alone, in your own pit of sorrow.

“Suit yourself, I’m only in town for the night. Wanted to make it worth my while. Especially with a gorgeous thing like yourself.” He says, a slight slur on his speech.

You just about had enough with today. The liquor making you feel the anger bubbly warmly in your chest. You grab your drink firmly and smash it on the ground at his feet.

“Shut the fuck up” you spit as you get out of your chair and storm out of the pub.

“Lovie, wait!” The man calls after you but you’re already out the door. Walking in the rain back to your flat, stomping the entire way.

The next morning you lay in bed, staring blankly at the wall when there was a knock at your door. Rolling out of the bed and slowly making your way over to the noise. Opening it annoyed, your met with the masked man once again. He was holding out your purse, looking down at the ground.

“You forgot this at the pub last night” he says softly. “ I’m quite sorry if I had upset you. I just thought you were so pretty and I-“

“Thank you. Do you want a tip or something? For bring it back?” You cut him off, snatching the purse out of his hand and reaching for your wallet.

“Not necessarily, just wanted to do the right thing. Have a lovely day miss.” He almost mumbles and turning away.

Your eyes soften. He wasn’t like the other guys, he wasn’t like your ex. He was just being nice.

You let out a soft sign. “Wait, sir. Here” you hand him your phone to put his phone number in.

“I owe you a tea or coffee. I’ll text you or you can text me the next time you’re in town.i owe you one.” You gave him a sweet but pitiful smile.

“No need to call me sir. The names Simon.” You could tell he was smiling ear to ear from the crinkles around his eyes.

The next time you see him, instead of coffee or tea he suggests dinner. From there, you grew to really like this mysterious masked man. He was kind, smart, cheeky, and surprisingly fun. Your love only grew the more you two spent time together. From movie dates, to the mind blowing sex. You can’t believe this amazing guy gave you a chance after your first and second interaction.

Simon purposed to you in the kitchen one Sunday morning. You two had been together for nearly 3 years and he couldn’t take it any longer. You had to be his, forever. You were cooking breakfast and sipping on your coffee. Blabbering about work and how your coworker wasn’t doing anything right when all of a sudden you see Simon crouch down out of the side of your vision. And there he was, a beautiful black and emerald ring, in a vintage gothic box he said the words “marry me.” It was never a question, it was always a statement.

Here you stand, a year and a half later. The most beautiful cathedral you had ever seen. Your sister is putting on your black tiara and matching black veil. Your makeup done to perfection. Emerald eye shadow to match the ring Simon had given you, long hair curled and swept across your back, black roses held tightly in your hands. Your dress was long sleeved, laced, and a train that dragged as long as the aisle. You looked like a queen, his queen.

The doors to the cathedral opened, and there stood all your friends and family looking at you in aw. At the end of the aisle was a tall and handsome Simon. He stood in all black, next to his mates and colleagues. The organs rang throughout the tall room and you knew this was finally the beginning of your life.

When you exchanged vows, you surprised Simon with a tattoo on your ring finger that read “till death do us part.” Simon gasped, as he presented his ring finger with the same tattoo.

And it was true, till death do us part. As Simon was your counter part. You two were sent to each other, and you’ll be sent back to where ever you were created, together.

[malaak]

man my life has definitely gotten significantly better these past few years but I've yet to have like. a good birthday lol I think it's just bad timing bc it's late March and things don't start getting better for me mentally until may ish

[lovexjoe]

Unspoken

Part 1 

Synopsis: Jack and Y/N have been best friend for years. She recently ended her 2 year relationship, due to moving to Atlanta for a better job opportunity. What’s going to happen when she stays with Jack for a week ?

Warning: fluffy, angst?, language and smut🧎🏽‍♀️

Y/N POV 

Great!!! I finally found an apartment for myself, but I have to stay at a hotel for a week due to maintenance. I sighed as I begin to search the internet for a hotel suitable to my needs. Currently I’m at Jack’s house, cause he offered to let me stay the weekend as I sorted myself out. Moving to a new state is draining. I left a lot of my things back home as my mom said it’s good to just start fresh. So I packed what I needed and hopped on the plane. I left so much behind, even my 2 year relationship. Surprisingly, I’m okay and even happier that it ended. There wasn’t a spark between us. He treated me well, but the relationship over all was boring. I guess I kept it going for so long, because it was better than being alone. 

“Alright what’s got you so stress? You been glue to the computer since you woke up” Jack says as he sits down next to me on the couch. 

“The apartment won't be ready for another week and I need to find a hotel beca-” 

“Hell no! Come on, you know you can stay here till it’s ready. I’m not taking no for an answer either. Now can you stop stressing before you explode. That vein on your forehead is serious” He starts his usual teasing. I laughed and playfully shoved him. 

Arguing with him was useless. It was his way or no way. I finally close my laptop and enjoyed whatever tv show he was currently hooked on. He stretched out his left arm and placed it on the back on the couch. I crawl into my usual spot: snuggled up with a blanket. 

“I missed you. I know you’re stressed but I’m happy to finally spend some time with you this week.” Jack says honestly. You were taken aback but also happy as well to be here with him.

“Me too”

Jack’s POV

She takes her usual spot on the opposite end of the couch, I so badly want to pull her close to me. As selfish as it sounds I hope her apartment takes an extra week so she could stay longer. And those god damn PJs she wears is gonna end me. She could wear a turtleneck and I’d probably still have the same reaction. 

I had met her through Druski as she was working with him for a while on video concepts and managing his social media. As soon as they linked up, she got his account to gain a million followers within a month. Thats why Jack put his full trust in her when it came to his social media. He’ll give her a heart attack here or there when he posts some random video of him trying to dance. Keyword is try because he looks like he’s glitching half the time. 

~~~~~

They indulge in a few episodes together before both of their stomachs start grumbling. Jack grabs his phone to open up UberEats. She gives him an insane look. 

“Jack you already ordered UberEats for breakfast, do you ever actually cook?” She arched her brows at him and he just looks at her cause lowkey she ate him up with that one. 

Oh yea forgot to mention, she got attitude that could last a lifetime and he fucking loved it. 

“You know I can’t cook!” He tried to justify but she’s already up and headed to the kitchen scanning the pantry and fridge for a simple meal. 

“Alright since you insist on me staying here for a week, you have to learn how to cook to at least survive.” She points the wooden spoon at him which causes him to laugh and throw his hands up in the air. 

“Goddamn Gordon Ramsey when did you even grab that!?” 

“Mmm don’t worry about that, give me a cutting board and knife stat! We making the world’s simplest meal. Pasta!” 

Pasta? Yeah no, he has spent his entire life over and under cooking pasta noodles. He watches her work the kitchen like a natural, pulling out ingredients he didn’t know what was what but he  tried his hardest to pay attention. She started with washing, then cutting then cooking. When it started to heat up in the kitchen, she tossed her hair up in a messy bun and in that moment Jack swore his heart could burst outta his chest.  He was trying his best not to stare inappropriately, but she was down right beautiful. 

Her ex was an idiot for letting her out of his sight, but he had to thank him because he’s not letting this chance pass up. There’s been multiple times throughout their friendship that her previous relationship and his hookups were not too fond of what they had. Which caused a few months of silence here and there. It use to kill him that he couldn’t reach out to her or hear her voice. She’s the reason why most of his hookups never lasted. Even during sex he wasn’t fully present, always distracted. 

As she finished up the tomato basil pasta, she turns around bumping into Jack not realizing he was so close to her. She felt so small around him, he looks down at her and smiles. 

“Hi” he says as he looks into her green hazel eyes that complimented her tan skin. 

“Hi…” she wish he would just kiss her, but she probably wasn’t what he even wanted. This man has the whole world at his feet. Why would he want her? They both stood there for a few extra seconds, just admiring their favorite features of the other. 

He swore she bite her lip 

She swore he was staring at her lips 

Kiss me already they both thought.

The sizzle of the pot reminded her she needed salt, so she purposely pushes up against him to grab the salt 

“Excuuuuseee me” she says innocently causing him to blush. 

“Smell yummy, thank you seriously” He says as she hands him his plate. As she makes her plate last, but Jack grabs it and heads over to the dinner table. Pulling out her seat for her, she happily sits as he grabs them some wine. 

“Oh my god, this is amazing!” He hums enjoying all the flavors that melt in his mouth. She’s really getting brownie points right now cause once his tummy is full he is a happy camper. 

This could be them, she thought. If only he wanted her. 

This could be them, he thought. If only she wanted him. 

After a few glasses of wine and enjoying the food together. Jack knew she was gonna crave something sweet because anytime he took her out dessert was always a must. He took her plate and nods his head for her to follow him.  

He grabs a bowl, vanilla ice cream, sprinkles, chocolate drizzle and whipped cream. Instantly her smile appears on her face, he still remembers her favorite toppings. How could he not though? He remembers everything about her. They both assisted each other is building the sundae. 

“Time for the finale!! Whipped cream!” She shakes it up and hands it to him to do the honors. Jack holds down the nozzle but it was stuck. He shook it one more time confused cause he literally just bought it when he told Y/N to stay at his crib. Yes he fully stocked the house and made sure it was squeaky clean before she got there. He even went to target and Ulta and stocked up on products she’d like or needed for the guest room. 

“This thing is stupid!” He holds the nozzle facing Y/N and it shoots out straight onto her neck and face. They both looked shock but Jack was trying so hard to hold his laughter in. 

“Oh you little shit!” They both busted into laughter. 

The wine definitely taking effect as laughter filled the air. Their stomach hurting so much from being full and the happiness that overcame them. Grabbing a towel, Jack pulls her close and the two still having the giggles. She wasn’t in control anymore because she couldn’t believe the words that was escaping her mouth. 

“Lick it off of me….” Jack freezes. Is he dreaming? Is she fucking with him? Wouldn’t be a nice joke but the way she was looking at him she’s lucky she doesn’t get bent over this island right now. 

“Are you sure?” He looks into her eyes wanting to confirm because if he starts god only knows if he’ll have the strength to stop. 

“Yea….make me your dessert.” She wipes some whipped cream off her neck slipping her finger in his mouth to suck it off. The need growing between them as she felt his tongue lick her finger dry. His lips meeting her neck, licking up all whipped cream on her as her moans escape her mouth. 

Fuck. He thought this was it, she’s gonna get eaten up tonight, he had to taste her. He was hungry for it. His hands caressing her face, as their lips finally meet. They both dreamt of this moment endless amount of times, but nothing….nothing could compare how this really felt. The little sounds she makes got him bricked up and aching. It’s almost as if she knew what effect she had on him cause her hand begins to palm him through his joggers. He groans into her mouth, causing a certain wetness to form in her panties. She never knew Jack had an aggressive side to him, she always teased him of being vanilla. 

He picks her up and sets her onto the island. Slipping her shorts off and spreading her legs. No panties? Fuck, her pussy glistened from her wetness under the lights. She closed her legs, starting to feel shy. 

“Nuh uh, open those legs for me. Lemme see that pretty pussy.” Oh god she loves this. He gets on his knees, kissing her lips, taking in her scent causing her hips to buck. 

“Jaack please don’t tease,” she feels his breath on her as he laughs, knowing exactly what he was doing. He takes her clit into his mouth, slowly sucking and swirling his tongue. He was so fucking handsome and with your pussy in his mouth made him even hotter. Working his tongue up and down your folds, you lift you hips slightly to ride his face. 

Fuck fuck fuck 

Jack couldn’t believe how fucking beautiful you looked under the island lights. Everything about you just amazed him. He works his movement with yours as he sees your body tensing up. 

“Fuck Jack, I’m- fuck I’m gonna cum!” In that moment he slips two of his fingers in, curving them upwards pumping them in and out. The only thing that could be heard was your cries and the wetness of your pussy. His fingers were big and long you could only imagine what he’ll stretch you out to. He pulls you close to him, placing little kisses along your cheek and neck. He lets you ride out your orgasm from his fingers. He only just begun with you, but he notices the slight sheen of sweat that covered your body. 

“You have no fucking idea how long I’ve wanted you.” He places a soft kiss on her lips. 

“Jack I need you, please.” She reaches into his jogger to pull him out. His tip already leaking with precum. Teasing him, she rubs his length between her wet folds causing him to groan. The lust that filled both of their eyes as they watch his tip play with her clit. Jack slipped in not being able to handle it anymore. 

Y/N lets out a soft cry not realizing how big he really was. Her back was cold against the marbled island, but the way Jack started pounding into her she couldn’t possibly give a fuck about anything 

“Jaackkk” she cries out throwing her head back

“I know it’s big baby, you can take it. Be good for me and take it.” His thumb starts to rub circles on her clit as he continues his ruthless thrusting. She was drunk off of his fucking. Not a single thought was running through her head besides the fact that he felt so fucking good and was deep.

“Look at you. Such a good fucking girl taking me. So beautiful baby.” He whispers his praises into her ear, till he feels her clenching him tightly. His free hand grabs the back of her hair firmly to make sure he was looking at him as she cums. 

“Mmm fuck, where do you want it?” She better answer quick cause those hazel eyes looked fucked out and he could barely hold on. 

“Inside me! P-please please” 

Jesus Christ 

He nods as he increases his speed, hitting a new spot for her causing her to come undone. She couldn’t even stop the babbling. 

“I love you I-I love you Jack.” He kisses her passionately, emptying himself deep inside her. 

“I love you too.” He says out of breath. 

He picks her up carrying them to his bedroom. She was completely out of it, her eyes closed and sleep slowly taking over her. He couldn’t imagine this moment any better. It happened so naturally. He tucks both of them in pulling her closely. She was his. He was hers. Thank god for that fucking apartment delay. 

~~~~~~~~

Y/N woke up feeling satisfied and definitely sore. Some of their friends were suppose to be flying in today to vibe for the next two days. She looks at the sleepy man next to her and smiles. They really had some nasty sex last night when just prior to that they were just best friends. She places a soft kiss on his forehead and decided to make them breakfast. She picked out some boxers and one of his t-shirts and got to work. As she was making them pancakes and eggs, the door bell rang and it was probably Druski since he had the earliest flight. She opens the door to see a girl, who looked like a super model holding a duffel bag. 

“Y/N, right?” 

“Uhh yeah…I’m sorry who are you?”

“I’m Jack’s girlfriend….”

Part 2? 😌

TAGLIST 

@dyttomori @harlowcomehome @itsyagirljaz

[the-mountain-flower]

The Exiled and The Outcast

Chapter Ten: By The Way, Thank You, For Saving My Life

At midday, Dainix took maybe a full minute just staring at the large, wooden doors of the library that he’d spent so much time in for the past sef. The room full of wood and paper and information, and it was only the day after his near encounter with his demon form.

Paper can also be damaged by water. Did that make him feel better or worse?

Worse. It only emphasized how delicate it all was.

Gods, he didn’t want to go in there. He’d held it off for this long, but it was over a day and a half since he’d done any of his research. And if there was any chance he’d find something, he had to try.

The door felt heavier to open than it had before. The old shelves loomed around him, their fragility distressingly obvious.

And…

And Falst was sitting at the desk Dainix usually used.

Approaching closer, when Falst didn’t react to his presence, it was clear he was actually sleeping, his head laying on top of a still-open book on the desk.

To his left was a small pile of more books; on his right two more that looked like they were sorted into categories. Most of them lay in front of a small “X” scratched into the wood, a couple more in front of a similarly scratched question mark.

Dainix couldn’t help but smile. He had known Falst liked the library, but this was his first time seeing him there.

Dainix pulled up another chair and grabbed the cushion from its seat. Then, gently so as not to wake the sleeping ferin, he slid the book from beneath Falst’s head, replacing it with the cushion. Falst murmured softly, but didn’t wake up.

It was kind of adorable, actually. He seemed like the kind of person who slept lightly, though for different reasons than Dainix did. So he looked surprisingly peaceful, resting deeply like that.

Strangely comforted by the presence- he spent too long alone nowadays- Dainix picked up the book he’d left off on a day and a half ago, and sat down next to the chair he’d brought over, and began to read.

It was the first time in a while that Falst slept without any nightmares, or at least none that he remembered.

Instead he dreamed about a pillow, which was weird, even by dream standards, since he hadn’t slept with a pillow beneath his head in years. It sort of just appeared out thin air beneath him, the absolute softest thing he’d felt under his head, and it made him very happy to sleep with.

He enjoyed a peaceful rest-

…Wait…

Falst bolted upright. He was sitting in a chair, in front of a wooden desk with… a cushion?

He hadn’t done that.

His books were on the desk, where he’d put them last night. But he didn’t remember stopping… had he fallen asleep while reading? But then why was there-

“Did you sleep well?”

…Oh. Damn it.

Falst’s face flushed with heat as he turned his head to face Dainix, who sat maybe a few feet away.

He’d seen Falst asleep.

First of all, it was dangerous to sleep anywhere that was open and visible. Even if he woke up easily- except this time apparently- he was most vulnerable when unconscious. It was dangerous if anyone found him asleep, especially that deeply.

But Dainix had.

And where most people would take the opportunity to try and get rid of Falst, instead he’d put that cushion under his head.

He’d… gone out of his way to make Falst comfortable. Why?

Even now, Dainix looked at him with more warmth and care than Falst knew how to react to.

“You okay?” Dainix asked when Falst had taken far too long to respond.

“Oh! Y-yeah.” Falst turned away to try and hide his definitely red face. “Thanks. For the cushion, I mean.”

“It’s the least I could do.”

What was that supposed to mean?

“I don’t think I ever thanked you.” Dainix said.

Falst startled. “What?”

“For last night,” Dainix put his book down, “You saved my life. I don’t know if I could’ve gotten out of there without your help.”

“Oh.” Right, I suppose I did do that. “Don’t worry about it, it was nothing.”

“No, really.” Dainix leaned forward, placing a hand on the Falst’s own hand, the one that was resting on the wooden desk. With the lack of the lava-like veins, came an equal lack of hesitation. “Thank you.”

If Falst thought the glow from the fire beneath his skin looked warm, he was proven wrong the second he saw the warmth in Dainix’s eye. The way he looked at Falst… his words could be nothing but genuine.

“You’re welcome.”

Falst didn’t know how long they sat there in silence. It could’ve been moments, it could’ve been days. His gaze was warmer than the coziest campfire, and Falst wanted to never look away. Freeze this moment in time and relax in Dainix's presence…

Falst cleared his throat, but didn’t remove his hand from beneath Dainix’s. “How are you feeling? After all that?”

“Oh. Um, not great, but… better than yesterday. I mean, I’ve been in plenty of life-threatening situations before.”

“Monster hunter does sound like a pretty adventurous career choice.”

Dainix laughed. “Yeah, it is. But I was never on my own. I’ve always had teammates, and we got really good at working together at that kind of thing. I don’t think I could’ve gotten out of there on my own, and I thought I was done for. Plus, the whole drowning thing was especially hard for me. Which I think is why I… you know.”

“Was a little bit on fire?”

“Yeah, that.”

“Never had risk of drowning in the desert, huh?”

“I mean… not usually, no. But most Ignan settlements, we get our water from underground oases. Little pockets of water gathering together over time, inside an environment where it’s otherwise so rare. They’re usually hidden from sight, it can take a while to find exactly where they are, much less a way in. And we always have to be really careful because… the ground above it isn’t always stable.” His hand held onto Falst’s a little tighter now.

“You fell in.”

Dainix nodded. “Right over the water. And I know how to swim in theory, but I’ve never actually done it before.” He paused, breathing deeply, like he was trying not to relive the moment. “I was fortunate. The others were able to get me out of there, and my dad was able to get me breathing again with… um, I don’t know what you’d call it in this language. The chest pushing-thing you do if someone isn’t breathing or their heart’s stopped.”

Falst’s confused expression was probably a bit comical. “What are you talking about?”

“You know? Like this?” Dainix removed the hand that was on top of Falst’s- which was fine, Falst wasn’t disappointed- and put it on top of his own, intertwining the fingers, and pantomimed pressing down rhythmically on thin air. Falst couldn’t help but smirk.

“Are you messing with me?”

“No! Did no one ever teach you that?”

“No, obviously. But keep trying.”

Seemingly to realize how ridiculous he looked, Dainix laughed and leaned back to his former position. “I can try and teach you sometime. The point is that I’ve got issues with water and fire now. Just four more elements to go, I guess.”

Falst didn’t miss the way Dainix smiled when Falst laughed at his joke. Not that it meant anything, and Falst certainly wasn’t going to overthink it.

“Anyway, what about you? How’d you even find me there?”

“Oh. I heard the collapse.” Falst replied. “First time something like that happened while I’ve been here. Went to check it out when I heard someone yell, and got worried. By the way,” Falst took the two books he’d gone over that were in front of the question mark he’d scratched onto the desk, and handed them to Dainix. “Not sure if either of these’ll be helpful, but you can check.”

“What?” Dainix accepted the books with a confused expression.

“These are some of the ones I’ve read before. Neither of them write about demons specifically, but there are a couple stories that seem similar.”

Dainix gave him a surprised look for long enough that Falst started to worry he’d done something wrong. Maybe he hadn’t wanted-

The next thing he knew, Dainix had wrapped his arms around Falst in what was the first hug Falst had gotten in years.

“Thank you.”

It… really wasn’t that big of a deal. He just… it was only fair. Dainix had been sharing his food with Falst. He was helping Dainix get out of the castle sooner.

Even if Falst really didn’t mind his presence. Even if was so much less lonely now that he had company. Even if it Dainix was actually kind of pleasant to be around.

It was probably the warmth of Dainix’s embrace that made Falst’s cheeks flush. “Don’t mention it.”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Is CPR common knowledge in Aurora? Or just in Dainix's experience since his dad has medical expertise? Who knows (except Red probably)

By the way, "CPR mouth-to-mouth=kissing" is something I hate SO much, so plz none of that, thank you

Remember to drink water, eat food, take your meds (if applicable), and get enough sleep. Love you all, and have a great [insert time here]! <3

[painted-doe]

WIP word search, part 2: the word-searchening

Got tagged again by dear @writethewolvesaway and I had so much fun with the first round that I decided to go again! Especially since you guys were so encouraging about Lagniappe... enjoy :)

My keywords were: whisper, bleak, yellow, glass

whisper From an untitled (but almost complete) Sambucky fic in which Valentina shows up, activates some latent Winter Soldier programming that causes Bucky to doubt his hard-won autonomy, and angst ensues.

“And let’s not kid ourselves, Sam Wilson’s not much better. Guys like him, they want a fixer-upper. They want the satisfaction of repairing something. But you… oh, Sarge, how long until he realizes you’re just way, way too broken for him to fix? Honey, I’m trying to help you. I’m here to offer you something.”

He spat on her expensive leather boot. She didn’t flinch. “A life as your little wind-up killer? Like I said. Get. Fucked.”

“A purpose,” she said, unruffled. “A real purpose, working with people who respect you for what you are. Who don’t expect you to be anything more than what you are.”

Her fingers found his chin, played sweetly with the divot there. He jerked his face away but she clung tighter, dug her thumbnail into the soft skin of his lower lip.

“Isn’t it hard?” she whispered. “Aren’t all those expectations just so goddamn heavy? People keep telling you to get better, get with the times, make amends. Make amends for being hurt all those years. Isn’t that wild?”

“Nobody’s telling me shit,” he hissed.

“Sure they are.” She smiled. “I get your therapy transcripts. I like to read them over breakfast.”

bleak From the same untitled fic as above.

Sam shook his head. "God, Shuri’s going to be devastated, she was so sure she’d…”

“I know. I know.”

“Don’t you think she’s going to want to be part of this?”

Bucky looked away. The low sunlight turned his dark hair to gold, flopping over his eyes. It was getting long and shaggy, but somehow still looked good. Everything looked good on Bucky. It was deeply unfair.

“She has the right to say no to us, at least,” he said at last. “It’s her work we’re messing with. Fine. I’ll call her. You work on tracking down the red book.”

“And de Fontaine? We have to figure out what she wanted, why she--”

“Don’t bother. We know. She said she was here to pick something up.” Bucky looked up at him. Jaw clenched, eyes big and bleak and vulnerable in that way that made him look like a scared child, and Sam’s heart twisted hard. “She wants the Winter Soldier.”

yellow Another snippet from from “Lagniappe”.

How could Sarah look him in the eye? Let alone allow him around her boys? Didn’t she know? Didn’t she know how deep the stains were fixed in him?

But she slid her hand down his arm in a friendly way, the metal one, and she smiled. 

All the angels he'd ever seen in stained glass had been fair-skinned and delicate and golden-haired; none of them had ever looked like solid, dark Sarah Wilson in the woodsy yellow sunlight. But here she was, brighter than any of them.

glass Yet another from "Lagniappe":

Those days of evaluations before the pardon had been mostly spent in windowless concrete rooms being interviewed by shrink after shrink. Being asked the same questions again and again in different ways to see if they could trick him into answering inconsistently. Having white coats repeatedly read off the list of trigger words that no longer sank hooks into his brain but still set his whole body trembling and sick, only to give him humiliating orders to see if he’d follow them: Stand on one foot. Sing me “Happy Birthday”. Drop and give me twenty. The only pleasure he’d taken in those sessions was in telling them to fuck off.

Jimmy Woo had hovered at the edges of those hazy shitty days. He was surprisingly high up the ladder of authority for such a young agent, and Bucky knew he’d often been in the other room, watching him through one-way glass or through the lens of a security camera. Sometimes Woo had been the one bringing him little paper cups of terrible black coffee, or styrofoam-wrapped sandwiches that tasted no better than their packaging, or, once, mercifully, a cigarette. For all his awkward glibness, the guy had been clever and respectful; he’d let Bucky go through it all without being restrained in mag-cuffs, and he’d looked him in the eye like a human being when he spoke to him. For a g-man, Woo had been all right.

If you read this far and you're a writer, consider yourself tagged! Even if (like me) you've been tagged before! Your words for this round are: guard, break, true, left

[callofdudes]

Coping platonic Simon x Reader

Summary: Everyone copes differently. You convince Simon to come to the bar for a drink.

A/N: A little thing that me and @itsscromp made up and I have official turned into a little thing. That ended up being a lot longer than I'd first expected.

CW: Alcohol, there's a lot of alcohol, this is platonic but there's like a flake of iffy stuff.

Word count: 4.3K

It wasn't uncommon for the 141 to go out drinking after a mission or spent the coming days indulging ones self. Throughout the years working as a team you each had come to learn of the others coping mechanisms. Gaz hid. Drowned himself out in music. He'd sleep and read to drown himself from the real world and usually would dissociated for a few days before seeking Price out for help. Johnny was similar. He'd write his feelings out on paper and workout until he flopped down in bed and couldn't move. His muscles pulsing a burning until he passed out from exhaustion. Price his himself in paperwork. It didn't help most times, you'd often come into the room seeing him coax a bottle of a scotch to his lips. His desk would pile high with distractions he'd run himself out.

You would rarely ever see Simon. He didn't talk. After missions Simon went mute and wouldn't acknowledge anyone for nearly a week. No one knows what he does for sure but they can speculate. Some say he hides his pain with pleasure, others say he drinks until he can't see. Others think he just lays in bed like a corpse. And most of it was true to see degree or another.

But you hated seeing your lieutenant like that. After debriefing he'd escape off to his room and wouldn't open the door until someone knocked to give him food. You always remember knocking and seeing the look in Simon's eyes when he saw you. Like he wanted to talk and reach out but he couldn't. It broke you.

So you decided surely anything other than what he was doing would be better. The first time you'd tried Simon had actually agreed. You'd knocked on his door and when he opened it, you looked into those eyes. Almost lifeless compared to how you could make them shine with one of your stupid jokes. "I'm going for a drink, you want to come?"

Simon paused. He still didn't stay anything, but his stance shifted. "I'm going to go waste myself at the bar. You should come."

Surprisingly, after Simon closed the door, he opened it a few minutes later with a sweater on and proper jeans. He followed you out to the car and ever since that has been your thing.

After debriefing you'd take a day to just sort yourselves out alone before meeting up at the bar and talking shit out until you felt to tired to continue. Sounds horrible but it was better than what you had been doing.

Tonight was no different.

Simon was quiet on your way to the bar. Price would drop you off before his meeting with Laswell and pick you back up when you called. You thanked your captain when he dropped you at the front door and the two of you walked inside. You were familiar faces. The bar wasn't exactly full on the late Wednesday night so you and Simon took the empty corner as usual.

Simon examined the room. His posture straight and gaze never remaining focused on one thing for too long.

You placed your hand over his and garnered his attention. "Try to relax." His eyes flickered around him in one last moment of contemplation before committing to facing the bar counter.

You ordered for the two of you and the ritual began. You usually would start. Something inside you would tick and a passing thought would breach your mind enough to put it into words. Simon nodded softly when you spoke. He swished his drink, hypnotized and calmed by the slosh and swish of the liquid. His mask remained fixed on his face while he visually interrogated the glass.

"So. Johnny invited everyone down to his place for leave. Have you given anymore thought to his proposal?"

Simon shook his head. He itched at the hem of his mask, wanting to tear it off and shove it further up all at the same time. He wanted to drink, to indulge, but his mind wanted to fight, to hunt the danger.

"Simon," you squeezed his hand, "It's ok." You looked around the bar. Hooded figures and quiet chatter. Loud clinks of glasses. You'd be lying if you said it didn't make your skin crawl and the hairs on your nape stand on end. But Simon was downright Stonehenge.

His eyelids fluttered briefly. "No. I haven't." He replied. If was barely a whisper. A secret carried on the breeze drifting from the main door. It was something so small and so forced you'd have missed it completely had you not been listening.

"Ok. That's alright. Have any plans at all?"

Simon shook his head, then quickly replied with another weak "No."

You nodded and took a sip of your drink. The warm liquid settled along your throat. The smoothness glided along your tongue in a way you couldn't explain. The zingy burn it left behind once you'd swallowed was worth the taste that followed. Simon examined you and finally gave him. He pulled up his balaclava and brought the glass to his lips.

The first few sips of bourbon always got Simon feeling more comfortable. He'd relax a little more and his voice would grow a little clearer.

His eyes were heavy. Shifting around the bar, lingering on you and then down at the table. You'd come to learn that you shouldn't bug Simon about his drinking. If he was on his seventh drink, asking him to stop would make him upset. It was the only way you could get him to cope in public. Around you where you could assure his safety.

He placed down the cup and rested his head in his hands. His shoulders hunched and he breathed out deeply. "I feel like shit." It was barely there again but you heard. You placed your hand on his shoulder and massaged the tension from the muscle. "Let it go. I'm right here. Just let it all out." Simon's hands turned to fists and his hands tightened on his mask. War clashed in his mind. His lips quivered and his molars ground against each other. "Do you ever just want to stop?" He took the cup in his hands and pulled up his mask. Without a thought he downed the rest of the glass and pushed it up the bar.

"What do you mean stop?"

"Give up. Go home. Retire and put this damn job behind you? It's fucking impossible. I love what I do. I crave it, live for every second. But what in the hell am I doing with my life??"

You frowned. He motioned the bartender over and motioned for another drink which was quickly brought to him. He placed the cup to his lips and drowned himself in the liquid. The cup was empty before you could speak.

"Simon, where's this coming from?"

"I'm tired of feeling like shit. It's like an addiction. You serve and you serve, being brave for your country and fighting to protect your home. And in return it destroys you. Chest candy and trauma. You can't put it down once you pick it."

You placed your hand over Simon's before he could motion for another drink. "Simon. You are one of the most capable soldiers I know. This is a hard job and it comes with its downs. Even if it costs everything we save hundreds, thousands of people from losing."

He looked at you with tired eyes. His tear line was red and irritated. Simon motioned another drink and swished it around. "I just want to do something right in my life." He murmured and choked back the alcohol. You looked down at the beer in your hand and placed it down. You turned your chair to face Simon and took his hand in both of yours.

"Ghost- Simon…" He looked at you. Stone cold sober. These words were spilled from trust, not his blind drunkenness. "I know. You want to prove yourself but you don't have to. Everyone already knows the Ghost. The Soldier who barreled through a hundred men and came out with a single wound. The man who is so big and has the stealth of a panther. You're the Ghost."

"Yeah. Exactly my point."

Simon turned back to the table and grabbed another drink. You both were quiet. Simon drank one cup after the other until you'd lost track of your tab. Simon always offered to pay for what he drank but it didn't make you feel particular. You felt sad watching Simon push more alcohol. You looked down at the bar and sighed. "You know. I care about you a lot Simon."

"I care about you so much. And you don't have to try to prove anything to me. Not to Price, or Johnny or Kyle. We all love you. We all care for you."

Simon rubbed his chin and placed down yet another empty cup. "I'm not in the right place right now. I just need some time."

"And that's ok." You slid closer and rubbed his back soothingly. You ran your hand over the back of his hood and back down. "Everybody has bad days Simon. And I know that a lot of big emotions can overwhelm you, they can overwhelm everybody. Sometimes you can't avoid those emotions. But it's not good to sit in them either."

He looked at you and then down at your hand on his. He bent over and laid his forehead on top of your knuckles. He rested on your hand and allowed himself to relax there. Just with you.

"I know the real Simon. I know it's hard but I don't want you to hide him from me. Don't try. Because I like Simon. Simon Riley is my friend. Alright?"

It took a minute but Simon nodded. He groaned tiredly. His stomach was buzzing with the warm alcohol. He shifted his head and looked up at you. "Are you gonna drink that?" He asked, lazily pointing at your beer.

You chuckled. "Yes Simon. But if you want one you can order one." He hummed.

Your back pocket buzzed, alerting both of you. You quickly pulled it out and looked at the number. "Oh…"

"Simon I'm so sorry I just have to take this call. That's ok? I'll be right back I promise."

Simon sat up and nodded. He watched you get up from the bar and walk to the entrance and outside. He watched the door for a while before turning back to the empty glass in front of him. It felt like instinct when he raised his hand and the bartender was at his side.

"Rough night?"

"You have no idea."

"I'm sure things will work out."

Simon hummed and picked up the drink. His eyes lingered on the door a moment more before sparing himself indulgence.

You stood outside. The evening chill ran down your spine and settled in your feet. "Hey, what's up?" You walked the length of the sidewalk and peered into the window while you talked. Simon hunched at the bar, as if something was pushing his head down. Like an unforgivable beast was pressing its weight on him and allowing him to drown. You turned away and tapped your foot anxiously.

The phone call took a lot longer than it should have. What you thought would have been an emergency was really just a check on, followed by thirty minutes away from Simon. When the call ended you looked back inside. Simon wasn't in hia chair. "Shit." You muttered.

You walked back inside and searched the bar's main area, but you couldn't find him. "Ghost?" You looked back outside, and then around again. And then you noticed him walking out from the bathroom. "Oh thank goodness. I thought you'd run away."

Simon didn't say anything. He looked down at you, his mind tumbling with man thoughts. "You look like you've had a bit to drink."

"Nah, I'm not fuckin' drunk." He muttered.

"Then why are you swaying like that?"

He frowned. "I'm not swayin' you're just short. Mmmmakes your eyes bad."

"Sure buddy, sure." You gently took his hand and guided him toward the front door. "Come on. Let's get you some water and then we should probably get you back home and into bed."

He watched you, his feet planted in the ground at the front entrance and he looked back at the bar. "I want to stay."

"Hmm?"

"I want to stay. Y/N, I want to stay. Please?"

While this had been your idea. There was a difference between a slightly drunk Simon, and very drunk Simon. And while you knew this wasn't going to end well, it had to be done.

"Simon, while I understand, I think you've had a little too much to drink, and as your friend, I'm trying to look out for you. I'm here to keep you from doing anything stupid, ok?"

Simon grimaced. He didn't seem happy to hear that. He wobbled over to you and reached out for you. His eyes were drowsy and heavy lidded. "I'm your lieutenant… that means that you need… you need to…" He groaned. His hands found your biceps and the rest of his body followed suit. He slumped against you and breathed heavily. His chest pounded like he'd just climbed a mountain. He rested against you for a minute, not moving, not speaking. His body was like putty.

"Don't feel good…" He finally groaned. He squeezed you tighter, barely giving you room to take his arms. "Ok, off to the bathroom then." You pulled him along, giving him time to stumble his feet along in your direction. He groaned when you reached the bathroom. You pulled him inside and with heavy resistance managed to pull him into an empty stall. He fell to his knees and slumped against the toilet. "Oh no- Simon don't let your face touch it." You cringed and gently pulled him back. You pulled his mask up over his nose quickly. He hiccuped and groaned. His body heaved and you had to look away when Simon coughed up vomit. He panted, attempted to get up, but his lunch had other plans. He gagged and arched over the toilet again.

"Simon…" You almost threw up just from the sounds. Your stomach churned and you had to try and focus on something else.

When Simon was done he fell backwards and slumped against your side. "Y/N… smelling colors…" His breathing was heavy and his body was exhausted. "Simon. Ok come on, let's get you hydrated. See if the bar has any water." Because that sentence had been said before. You pulled him up as best you could and helped him walk with you. When you left the bathroom some patrons were watching, those that weren't drunk off their asses giggled and whispered. You helped Simon back over to his seat and coaxed him to sit down.

Simon grabbed your arm when you turned to the bartender and asked for water, which he thankfully brought over to you. The cool cup of water was pushed over to Simon. He examined it before picking it up and downing it like alcohol. "Do you feel better buddy?"

He slumped against you. His eyes fluttered and he looked up at you. "You have two heads…" He practically giggled at this discovery.

"Simon," You chuckled, "Oh you're so drunk. But your mood seems better eh?"

"I'll ring Price and get us home."

Simon watched you. He frowned and tapped your arm. "I don't know why you're laughing. Are you laughing at me?? Did I say something wrong?"

"Simon…" You sighed. "No buddy, you know I would never laugh at you. Ok? Why would I ever laugh at you?"

"But you laughed…" He whispered.

You attempted to stop yourself but you could only chuckle at how Simon was acting. "I've just never seen you this drunk before. I thought it was funny. It's alright."

He groaned but managed to stay quiet for a moment. He laid his head down on the bar and looked up at you with soft eyes. "Hey…"

"Hmm?"

"You're my friend. You know that??"

"And… and sometimes when I bug you I don't mean it. I'm only playing, but if I ever go too far and hurt your feelings just let me know… ok?"

You smiled. "Thank you Simon. You're my friend too. And I know you like to play and joke around. But if that's how you show your love for me, bring it. I feel the same way, if I ever tease or push too much you can tell me. Not that I don't think you will. Because I feel the same way about you."

Simon grabbed your hand again. His warm, gloved hand tightened around your own as he spoke. "Shh, don't tell Johnny ok? But you're my favorite sergeant."

"You leaned close. "Your secret is safe with me Simon." You rubbed his arm. "But I think it's time to go home. Do you want to go home?"

Simon shook his head. "No… I want to stay with you. I won't let you out of my sight. Ok??"

"Alright. We can stay only a little longer. Then we'll go?"

Simon nodded and thanked you with a huff. He looked back over the bar and pointed lazily at the guy. "Can I have more??"

You eyed the bartender who looked at you instead of Simon. "He can have an iced tea. No alcohol." The bartender nodded and walked off to do his thing. Simon watched and waited. He perked up and smiled when the drink arrived. He looked at you and thanked you with a whisper before taking the drink in hand. "You're the best."

"Of course, bud."

You rolled your eyes when Simon downed the cold liquid, humming when his stomach got a taste of something new.

"Y/n…" Simon slumped and pushed the iced tea away. "I'm not good."

"Oh? Do you want to go home now?"

Simon nodded.

"Alright. That's ok. I'll call Price and we'll head home."

He groaned. "Can I hold your hand??" He asked as if he wasn't already close enough. "Yes, you can." You held out your free hand while you dialed Price with the other. He held your hand firmly and pulled it closer to him. You could feel his heavy heartbeat and the way he cradled your hand against him like paper.

"YN? How are things going?" Price asked when he finally answered the phone. "We're ok Captain, but Ghost is ready to head home."

"You do realize how late it is, correct?"

"Yes sir. I apologize. I got distracted and I didn't watch the time. Or Ghost."

Price sighed. "Give me fifteen minutes."

"Thank you captain."

"Mhm."

He hung up the phone swiftly, leaving you to run your hand down Ghost's back. He melted at the soft touches.

"Oh... Bloody hell Y/N. I feel like shit. Don't know any sergeant who'd want to see their lieutenant acting a fool." He muttered under his breath. He shuddered out a breath and pressed your warm hand to his face. It was bloody adorable.

“Hey it’s ok to let loose once in a while, believe me price does the same." You reassured him. You rubbed his shoulder and met his gaze. A soft haze of warm alcohol swimming in his eyes.

" I trust you... Family I never had y'know? You always seem so happy and it makes me feel human again. Like I matter. So don't think of going away…" He slumped against you and heaved.

"I'm gonna hang on to you so you can't go anywhere." He dropped your hand and clung to your arm. His hands gripped your bicep. "I wanna go home now…"

"Alright Simon." You patted his head. "That's ok. Price will be here soon."

"I'm tired and I don't feel good again." He muttered.

"I know Simon, you're doing good, once we get home we can get you into bed."

Simon clung to you until you saw Price pull up in the truck outside. After paying the tab you coaxed Simon from his chair and helped him across the bar. "Y/N…"

"It's ok, one foot in front of the other." You walked into the cool night and saw Price waiting on the sidewalk.

"Bloody hell you two."

Simon groaned when the wind hit him and stumbled to flip his hood on.

"Come on, get in the truck, I'll take him."

Price walked up to Simon and attempted to move him but Simon pushed him off and clung to you tighter. "Can't. He won't budge."

Price huffed. "Simon, come on soldier. You can let them go for two minutes."

“No I said I’d never let them go." Simon pushed away again and wrapped his arms tighter around you. "See??"

Price massaged the bridge of his nose and sighed. "Simon, I really don't want to do this."

"I can't let go…"

"Simon- you can hug or whatever in the car. I just need to strap you in. Please, it's late and I don't want to be in this parking lot longer than I have to." He coaxed one of Simon's hands up and pulled him gently away from you. “Fine but y/n is coming with me."

"I'm right behind you bud." Simon let go and followed Price over to the car. You kept close distance and opened the door for Price.

The larger man helped Simon up and lifted him up into the seat. Price did up his seatbelt and secured him into place. "Good man." He patted Ghost's chest and shut the door.

Before you could hop into your seat Price cleared his throat. He motioned to your pocket and raised an eyebrow. With a sigh you pulled out the receipt and saw Price's eyebrows twitch at the tab.

"Goodness. In the car, I'll get you home and into your bunks. Make sure Simon has some water at home and whatever else he needs for tomorrow morning."

"Yes Captain."

You climbed in and smiled when Simon looked over at you. "Are you all good Simon?" He hummed. Once your seatbelt was secure Simon leaned to the side and rested his head on your shoulder.

Price looked up into the rearview mirror and sighed. "I don't know if this is better for him."

"I know this captain." You looked at Simon who muttered incoherently into your shoulder. "But I can't leave him in his room all alone. Goodness knows what he'd do. What he is doing. I want him to be able to at least release his stress around someone who can help. To talk if he needs to. Not bottled up in his room with his own bad thoughts."

Price nodded. "If you both are willing to keep up on it."

You nodded and held Simon's hand until the car came to a stop at base. You looked down at Simon and smiled. "We're home."

Price opened the door and helped Simon back out. He practically wrestled with Simon until the taller one was on his own feet. You came back around and hooked Simon's arm over your shoulder. “Thanks price I’ll take care of it from here."

"Uh huh, get some sleep sergeant."

"Uh- yes. Will do. Come on Simon, let's get you to bed."

You walked into base and the place was silent. All the lights were off and doors were closed. It was way past lights out for everyone. You felt a little bad keeping Simon out so late.

"I'm tired. But I don't want to sleep." Simon grumbled.

You opened the door to his room and helped him inside. "You need to sleep , Simon, you're tired."

"Mmmnoo."

“Then why are your eyelids droopy huh?" You set him down on his bed and try to push him back into the sheets but his hands remain firm on you. "Simon, come on, lay down."

"I'm not tired! It's just a thing…" His eyelids fluttered and his soft irises faded away, blocked by heavy eyelids.

"Y/N I said I'm not tired. Trust me. I know what I'm doing..." He held onto you tighter in a last ditch effort to keep himself awake. His eyes closed for a moment before he shot his head back up. You smiled softly and pushed him down into bed. "Alright Simon. Do you want the mask off?" Simon nodded softly, his eyes fluttering closed again. You struggled to pull it off while he clung to you, but when you did you laid the balaclava on the nightstand. "Sweet dreams, ok?"

"No... I'm not gonna sleep…" His hands claw against your biceps and down across your forearm. His grip loosened as his muscles gave out and his hands fell away. Gloved fingers slipped and fell at his sides. His eyes closed and his head rested peacefully back against the pillow.

You grabbed the hem of the blanket and pulled it up over his shoulders. “Goodnight my friend." You whispered. You ran your fingers through his messy hair and exited the room.

You yawned and walked to your own room where you fell down onto the mattress and felt your body relax. And you also passed out.

[anabdaniels]

Flufftober 2023 with Agent Whiskey- Day 4- Age regression

Paring: Agent Whiskey x AFAB!Reader

Word counting: 790

Rating: Teen and up audiences

Warning: The following work contains brief mentions of body shaming and mean behavior towards kids.

What was that phrase? Old wounds don’t hurt anymore? You couldn’t disagree more with it. More than ten years had passed since the last time you had seen your progenitor (calling him father was certainly too much) and you were sure that all those bad things he had done to you didn’t affect you anymore, until that afternoon. Somehow, he had found out where you worked and had just shown up there, once again telling you how ungrateful you were for having extinguished any contact with him. Years ago, you would have spent three hours fighting him, but nowadays, having such a calm and comfortable life for so long, you just ran to your car and drove home.

Once back at the ranch, you finally had come out of the survival mode and started to feel all those horrible memories of your childhood hit you hard, all those times your progenitor made you feel like the worst kid in the world just because you asked for a second explanation about something or couldn’t have the best grade on school or because he thought that was fine to say to a seven-year-old that she needed a diet.

Usually, you wouldn’t disturb Jack with these things during his office hours, but everything was hurting so much at that moment that you didn’t even though before calling him and telling him what happened.

When he finally got home, Jack felt like his heart was going to explode with the idea that you’ve passed through such a hard moment alone. He walked upstairs, imagining that he’d find you in the bedroom. He opened the door slowly, unable to contain a smile when he saw you curled up on the bed with your teddy bear, already realizing that you had entered your little space and absolutely not surprised by it.

Calmly, he leaned by your side, caressing your face and kissing your forehead, smiling warmly when you looked at him with puffy red eyes, looking desolate.

“Are you okay, honey?” when you simply let go of your teddy bear and moved between his arms, Jack had the only answer he needed to know that you weren’t okay at all. He snuggled you and kissed the top of your head, caressing your back gently. “Do you wanna talk?” he asked quietly and your answer was just shaking your head negatively.

Patiently as always, he kept caressing your back and cuddling you, observing when you tried to move your hand closer to your mouth to nibble your knuckles as you always used to do in these situations, but he stopped you, aware that most of the times you ended up hurting yourself accidentally. Jack couldn’t hide a soft smile when you pouted after his impediment, and then he opened the nightstand drawer and grabbed your pacifier, giving it to you promptly. You let out a happy noise and took your teddy bear back before nestling yourself even more between his arms with a good amount of excitement, looking at him with a soft expression, not surprisingly feeling better just for being close to him.

“Easy, baby. You’ll break your old cowboy like that.” He chuckled while accommodating you better with your head lying on his chest. You mumbled something, still with the pacifier in your mouth, making Jack raise one eyebrow. “Haven’t we talked about speaking with the pacifier?” he questioned sounding really much like a father. You nodded and took the pacifier out of your mouth before repeating what you wanted.

“Can take a nap?” you asked quietly in a slightly slurred speech.

“Of course, my little angel.” He answered calmly while patting your head.

“Thank you.” You placed your head better on his chest “Love you, daddy.” You said softly while closing your eyes and putting the pacifier back in your mouth.

“I love you too, my pretty baby.” Jack answered in a gentle tone and kissed your forehead, resting his face on the top of your head while holding you tight and caressing your back.

Ten minutes later you were already asleep, Jack kept caressing your back and appreciating the weight of your upper body on his chest. He knew that you’d probably still on the little space when you woke up, but he didn’t care, on the contrary, he was really happy with the fact that you felt comfortable and safe around him to act like that. You needed paternal love and life had taken him the chance to give someone all the fatherly love he had many years ago when he lost his unborn baby, in the end, both of you had the chance to have what you two always wanted, and it was more than enough to make Jack truly happy.

Flufftober masterlist

[susansluvpage]

How many children did David Jones really have ? I know he had four daughters via marriage but, now I have heard he had an illegitimate sons and maybe another daughter too! There’s a story about a boy who hung around David, that looked just like him. Would have been born early 80s. There is also a girl in Boston claiming to be his daughter.So wondering how many children he really had? Also a story about him having a son in 1987 named Sean mother lived in Indiana . Sorry to burst everyone’s bubble but David liked the ladies a lot. Including when he was married. Oh! I get in trouble on social media when I tell the truth. Some of his fans want him to be a saint, he wasn’t. People that knew him well knew about his womanising and his behavior when he got drunk. David was a fantastic special man, extremely talented and very intelligent, masculine and loving. but he had problems in his personal life. Many stories have come out about his affairs when he was married since his death. He complained himself that his romantic relationships were not good later in his life. He also had a drinking problem. There are many printed stories about his drinking problems. Micky even wrote about it in his book. I truly cared about him and wish life had been better for him. Found articles now that admitted he was separated from his third wife for about two months and heading for another divorce right before his death. He even said in a December 2011 interview that his marriage was tumultuous. He was not happy then.His wife admitted she was abusing him mentally and physically. Annabel talked about it in her podcasts. She also talked about his drinking problem. Breaks my heart to know he went through that, he didn’t deserve to be treated that way. Yes, David is my inspiration for the Rockstar Romances I write. They are mostly fiction and fantasy books. Adults only. Getting ready to publish my third book soon. Have two on Amazon already. Sorry to those people that don’t want to know the truth about David. Wish someone who knew him well would write a true story about his life. David really never talked about his sex life or drinking problems in his books, didn’t even mention his arrest for DUI. Or the car accidents he had. Thank goodness he was not hurt in those accidents. I know he suffered through many other serious injuries and surgeries in his life. He was active so he had accidents, His jaw, broken bones, back issues. His third wife even cracked his ribs with a shoe. It’s all so heartbreaking to know he suffered and was in pain. I really wish I had been there more for him. I hadn’t seen him for the last ten or so years of his life, my own life had so many ups and downs back then. Probably a good thing I didn’t see David when his wife was abusing him. Think I would have done what his own daughter Annabel wanted to do. As a police officer I seen so much domestic abuse, surprisingly many men were abused but would be reluctant to admit it. Guess had to do with a masculine macho thing to admit they were being abused by a woman. Oh well, have to get over this subject. Can’t stand people hurting each other or themselves. But it hurts to know someone who you cared about was going through it. I know David was know angel himself but he didn’t deserve it. I knew his relationship with his wives and girlfriends kept breaking up, usually they broke up with him. Was his drinking the cause? Unfaithfulness? I know Anita had an interview about her divorce but I can’t find the article that people told me about. I can only go by what Annabel’s podcast said and other sources. All I know is I do miss him and cared about him. Can never forget the time we spent alone together, it was along time ago. I wish I had told him about my darn emotional empathy before. I knew him better than he thought I did. But we were friends over the years. Really don’t know if anyone is even interested in my writing about this. David may have been only 5’3” but he was very masculine and not small all over. Wish there was a way we could save are memories besides photos. Love to all!

[kumeko]

A/N: For the @aerith-zine! I’m a greedy person and wanted to write all of Aerith’s relationships. Well, almost all of them.

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…

i.

Elmyra was hot. Aerith stood on her toes, leaning against the bed as she timidly pressed her cool hand against her mother’s forehead, her skin slick from sweat. No, not just hot, she was burning up. People weren’t supposed to feel like this, right? People weren’t supposed to be lying on their bed, looking as pale as a ghost, their brow furrowed with pain.

For once, Aerith’s connection with the lifestream was of no help here. The voices only told her what she already knew, leaving her with the same sense of helplessness she had at the train station a year ago, her mother’s arms wrapped around her weakly. Elmyra had found her then.

Who would find her now?

“That feels good,” Elmyra slurred, leaning into the touch as she stirred out of her fitful slumber. “Nice and cool.”

“It does?” Aerith leaned closer, pressing both of her hands now against Elmyra’s skin. If it could help, just a little, she’d do anything.

“Yes.” Elmyra’s gaze was unfocused. She smiled weakly. “Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. It’s just a little fever.”

Nothing about it felt little. For the months she’d known her second mother, Aerith had seen her as a powerhouse. Unstoppable, stubborn, and strong, it seemed like nothing could keep her down. Yet, now she looked frail as she lay on the bed.

“I’ll get you medicine,” Aerith whispered, already looking around Elmyra’s immaculate room for money. It would be expensive, but maybe she could work it off. She could sell more flowers. She could—

A hot hand reached up, tousling her hair and jolting her out of her thoughts. “It’ll be okay,” Elmyra repeated gently. “It’s nothing serious.”

Her mother had said the same. Her mother’s grip had been just as weak. Aerith reached up, squeezing Elmyra’s rough hand. “It isn’t?”

“Yeah. Just need some sleep.” Elmyra smiled reassuringly, but that only made her feel worse. “A little rest, a little food, and I’ll be right as rain.”

“You promise?” Aerith asked softly, biting her cheek to keep back her tears.

“I promise.” Elmyra’s eyes fluttered close, her hand slipping away. “Just…a little…nap…”

Aerith’s throat closed. She grabbed her hand tightly, terrified. Wake up. Don’t leave me. Please.

But she couldn’t say the words, couldn’t voice her fears. She’d said them to her mother, and her mother had spent her last hours comforting her.

If her second mother did that, she wouldn’t rest. She wouldn’t recover. And Aerith would be alone again. Clutching Elmyra’s hand, she swallowed down her fears. “Okay.”

Aerith gently set Elmyra’s hand on the bed and repeated, “Okay.”

She had to focus on what she could do. There were flowers outside, they would keep the sickly smell out of the air. There was food in the kitchen—Aerith could make something simple.

This wasn’t like the time at the station. This time, she could do something about it.

ii.

There was something hilarious about watching Zack build her a wagon. Maybe it was just how big his sword was compared to the tiny hammer in his hands. Yet, for a SOLDIER, he seemed more comfortable with the hammer than he did a blade. In another life, he could have been any man from the slums, armed with a cheerful smile and disarming charm.

“This is going to be even better than the last one,” he crowed, looking triumphant as he hammered in the spokes for the wheels. Zack glanced at her, his eyes bright. “Don’t you think?”

The man was fishing for compliments and Aerith refused to let him have it so easily. “You say that every time.”

“And I mean it every time,” Zack replied, not looking the least put out. Despite his easy-going attitude, he could be surprisingly stubborn.

Still, two could play that game. Aerith rested her hands on her hips and huffed. “I’m starting to think you’re not doing your best.”

Zack waggled his brow and smirked slyly. “Maybe I’m just finding excuses to see you again?”

He was just teasing. She was pleased, nonetheless. Fighting back her blush (she couldn’t let him know he won), she retorted, “Maybe I’ll leave you for someone who actually knows what he’s doing?”

Not that he bought it for an instant. “Aww, don’t say that. I’m doing my best here.” Turning the wagon right-side up, Zack presented it with a flourish. “See? Isn’t it awesome?”

“Hmmm…” Aerith circled the wagon, pretending to appraise it. It was much better than before, she had to admit. With a white base, gold trim, and waist-high handles, she could actually carry her flowers around easily. The real prize though was the pink ribbon around the wagon. It wasn’t the same shade as her own ribbon, but she recognized the finishing touch for what it was.

“So, what do you think?” Zack asked again, his smile growing broader as though he’d read her thoughts.

Aerith stroked her chin, bending down as she inspected the wagon. Peeking up at him, she teased, “It’s acceptable.”

“Acceptable?” Zack’s jaw dropped and he clutched his chest. “Fine, I’ll—”

A buzz from his pocket cut him off. Aerith’s heart sank as her gaze flickered to his phone. Another mission. Another time he had to leave.

“Always with the bad timing,” he muttered, glaring at his phone as he pulled it out.

It buzzed again in response. When he didn’t press anything, she raised a brow. “Aren’t you going to pick it up?”

“I don’t want to. It’s like they know I’m having a good time and want to interrupt.” Zack sighed, shoulders slumping as he finally accepted the call.

“A good time,” Aerith repeated, warmth spreading through her chest and down to her toes. It was a strange feeling, like she was floating and sinking, and she wondered if being with Zack was always going to be like that. Smiling while he was here, lonely when he wasn’t—he left her unsettled with every visit.

Bending down, she picked up a flower and pressed it against her nose.

Somehow, she didn’t hate that feeling.

Zack’s frown grew deeper as he listened to the call, before finally hanging up. He glanced at her, then at the wagon, and rubbed his neck. “I have to go. Wish I didn’t but…well…” He gestured at himself. “Part of the job.”

I wish you didn’t either. The thought surprised her. Aerith smiled into the flower before holding it out. “Here’s your payment, good sir.”

Zack accepted it gracefully and tucked it into his ear. “And here I was hoping for a kiss.”

Aerith giggled. “Maybe next cart.”

iii.

Aerith didn’t get many visitors at her church. She certainly didn’t get repeat visitors. Yet, if she had to guess, she wouldn’t have expected it to be the ex-SOLDIER who had crashed through her roof days ago.

And she definitely wouldn’t have expected him to be standing at her door awkwardly, with a hammer, nails, several boards, and the most contrite expression she had ever seen. She felt bad just looking at him, like she had kicked a puppy, and she hadn’t even said anything yet. Still kneeling next to her flowers, she looked up at him with a teasing smile. “Did you get lost again? At least you didn’t crash on the flowers this time.”

“I’m not—” Cloud cut himself off. Brow furrowed and lips pressed into a straight line, he looked like a grumpy stray cat. Clearing his throat, he mumbled, “I’m here to fix the roof.”

Aerith blinked, surprised. “You’re what?”

“Fixing the roof,” he repeated, avoiding her gaze.

“You are?” Somehow, that was even more surprising than the fact that he had returned. As fun as their date had been, she hadn’t expected to see him again. Perhaps he had liked it more than he had admitted.

“Yeah.” His ears turned red as she studied him and he quickly crossed the church. “So I’ll go do that.”

She could only watch as he awkwardly escaped into the back room, practically bounding up the stairs to the roof. It wasn’t long till he was directly above her, his blonde hair poking over the hole as he arranged himself.

There was something nostalgic about the way he laid a board across the hole, in the way he swung the hammer with the same ease as he had swung his sword. It was the second time she’d seen a SOLDIER who’d looked better with an ordinary tool than a weapon. Part of her wondered if they were all like that.

Aerith giggled. Maybe the SOLDIER program was just raising a bunch of carpenters.

Cloud looked over the lip of the hole, confused. “Why are you laughing?”

“Nothing, nothing.” She waved away his question, her shoulders still shaking at the thought. “You’re better at repairs than I expected.”

“It’s just a roof. Anyone could do that.” Despite his words, he sounded pleased. Despite his blunt honesty to others, he was entirely dishonest with himself.

What a mess of contradictions. Aerith wanted to untangle them all, to unravel him and find out what made him tick.

Can I meet you again?

She wondered how he’d react if she said that. She wondered how she’d react if she said that. It was a bittersweet feeling, her heart moving forward, old loves making the way for new. Aerith plucked a flower, twirling it between her fingers. “Should I repay you with another date?”

There was a loud clunk and a louder curse as Cloud accidentally hammered his hand.

iv.

Aerith wrapped her arms around her knees, curling into herself slightly as she stared at Midgar. They were so far from the city, it was just a green speck in the horizon. Soon, they wouldn’t even be able to see it anymore.

Soon, they’d be in places she couldn’t even imagine.

She glanced above her, at the night sky. They had been travelling under its bright blue twin every day. Her mom and Zack had been right—she could handle it. Yet, the sense of fear refused to leave. They were finding out more about the Cetra, more about her people, and she wasn’t sure if she was ready for the answers.

“Something buggin’ you?” Barret asked, startling her as he sat down next to her.

Aerith stiffened, trying not to shout. Everyone else was fast asleep and while they were safe enough, these woods were full of monsters. A single loud noise, and they’d have to fight for their lives as they searched for another safe spot to rest.

Calming down, Aerith smiled weakly. “Nothing. Couldn’t sleep?”

“Nope.” Barrett sighed, raising his head as he stared longing at Midgar. “Just missin’ Marlene.”

That was a feeling she understood. Aerith squeezed her legs, remembering her mom.  “Me too. I wonder how mom’s doing.”

“I wouldn’t worry too much about her.” Barrett patted her back, his hand heavy and warm. “Elmyra’s a tough cookie. She’s doin’ just fine.”

“I know, it’s just…” Aerith rubbed her knee, mulling over the right words. “After all that’s happened, and we’re so far…”

“I feel that. I keep wondering if leaving Marlene behind was the right choice.  I guess we just have to hope.” Barret smiled lopsidedly, squeezing her shoulder. “Is that why you’ve been distracted the last few days?”

“Huh? What do you mean?” Aerith blinked, confused.

“You haven’t sounded like yourself.” Barret rubbed his chin. “We’ve been through a lot, I know, but even for that…”

“Oh.” Aerith rested her chin on her knees. “I…”

I’m scared.

She wasn’t sure of what. For what. Was she scared for herself, for her safety? Zack had left home like this and he had never returned. Her mom would be left alone. Her mom could die alone. And what about what those scientists had said about her?

“I’m homesick,” she lied, not wanting to delve any deeper into those thoughts. “That’s all.”

v.

“How are you holding up?”

After travelling with her companions for months now, Aerith wasn’t the least bit surprised when Tifa sat down next to her, two steaming cups of tea in hand. Maybe this was what friendship was like—knowing without being asked if someone else needed help or a kind word.

She could only hope she had given the same love and support back.

“Okay.” Aerith gratefully accepted a cup, wrapping her fingers around the warm ceramic. The sweet scent of chamomile soothed her.

“You sure?” Tifa prodded gently, looking down at her cup. “It’s okay if you aren’t, considering, well…everything.”

Aerith automatically glanced over her shoulder to where Cloud was sleeping, still knocked out from whatever control Sephiroth had over him earlier. A shiver ran through her spine as she remembered him bearing down on her, his sword high in the air, his eyes blank.

But that hadn’t been him.

That hadn’t been his fault.

“It’s fine,” she repeated, shaking her head. “It wasn’t like he wanted to do it.”

“He didn’t, but that doesn’t mean you have to be fine with it.” Tifa reached over, squeezed her knee. “It must have been scary.”

Aerith chuckled weakly. “Fine, it’s not fine. Happy now?”

“It’s not about me,” Tifa protested, sitting back. “It’s about you.”

Aerith’s laugh was real now. “You know what, I’ll have Cloud fix up my entire church. To make up for it.”

“The whole church?” Tifa joined in, snickering softly as she bumped shoulders with her. “I saw the place. I’m not sure if he’s up for it.”

“Then he’ll just have to do it again.” Aerith smiled as Tifa laughed in disbelief. Raising her cup, she took a sip, letting the warm tea carve a path through her chest and into her belly. Her mom had always said it was easier to think with food inside. She had been right. “Thanks, Tifa.”

“Anytime.” Tifa smiled warmly. “You should get some rest. I’ll cover the watch.”

“Sure. And…” Aerith gnawed her lip, her fingers tapping softly on her cup.

Her mom had also said it was better to talk things out. Other people could see the paths she couldn’t take. If she told them about the temple, about the white materia, perhaps they could help.

“Tifa—”

“Hmm?” Tifa hummed, tilting her head slightly to indicate she was listening. Her gaze was focused entirely on the unconscious Cloud.

If she told them, they’d all go with her. Cloud might attack her again. They all might have to fight him again.

It might not go as smoothly this time. Someone could die.

This was her burden to bear. Aerith shook her head. “Make sure you rest too.”

vi.

It wasn’t a surprise when her mom visited Aerith’s church, cleaning the benches every so often, sitting there for an hour or two as she gazed absentmindedly at the flowers. It hadn’t been a shock either when Cloud had spent his nights sleeping in the pews, firmly keeping one foot in the grave despite the life coursing through his veins.

Aerith had expected that after she’d died.

What she hadn’t expected was for a whole gaggle of people to invade her church on an almost weekly basis now, tearing up the floorboards as they widened the area for the flowers. Her mom took charge, as always, guiding Marlene and Denzel as they tried to plant new seedlings. Barret and Cloud were left with the heavy lifting, taking aside boards, clearing up debris. Tifa handled the cleaning, Yuffie the odd jobs, and Vincent…

Well, he was there, and that counted for something. Aerith wasn’t sure what, but it counted for something. She stood in the center of her old home, invisible to all as she took in her old friends.

“Whatcha thinking?”

Well, invisible to all but one. She glanced over her shoulder as Zack nimbly stepped beside her, his expression curious. Aerith gestured around them and laughed. “I guess I can’t call this the abandoned church anymore.”

“It never was,” he dismissed, shaking his head. “You were always here.”

“I guess I was.” Aerith watched as Cloud leaned against the wall, wiping the sweat from his brow. He couldn’t see her anymore. None of them could. “I didn’t think they’d all come here though.”

“Why wouldn’t they?” Zack walked forward to the buster sword in the center of the flower patch, running his hand along the hilt. His eyes lowered, his smile tender. “They love you.”

Aerith clasped her hands behind her, slowly walking forward. “They did,” she agreed.

Zack looked at her over his shoulder. “They do.” He raised a brow. “Why else do you think they’re here? To remember you.”

And for a moment, she could hear it—hear Marlene telling Denzel about the pretty flower girl, hear Elmyra tell Barret about the time she had a fever, hear Cloud remembering about fixing the roof and Tifa recollecting their shared tea. They all said her name, reverently, mournfully, softly, their expressions bittersweet.

Aerith did not need to be remembered. It was not something she had asked for. Not something she had wanted.

No, what she had desired was something simpler than that.

“You know, when I died, I realized how many things I wanted to say.” Aerith gripped her dress, her head bowed as she stared at her feet. “How many wishes I wanted to tell, how many things I left unsaid…it was stupid. I should have just said them.”

Zack wrapped an arm around her. “Me too.”

She leaned on him, shoulders shaking. “I wanted Mom to never leave. I wanted you to stay. I wanted to see Cloud again. I wanted to talk to Tifa more.  I wanted to see Marlene grow up and tease Barret about it and—I just wanted them all to be happy.”

“You know,” he whispered, gently coaxing her to raise her head. “I think they heard that wish.”

Blinking away her tears, Aerith watched as her friends, her family, worked.

Aerith couldn’t hear what they were saying. But she could see their smiles, see the way they looked at each other. For all the pain, they were happy. For all the loss, they were here.

And for all the things she had never said to them, they had heard her most important, selfish wish.

Don’t forget me.

[edogawa-division]

ARB Birthday Special 2023: Yuriko Kuromiya

~~ December 22nd ~~

“Death is not the opposite of life, but a part of it.”

Login Lines:

“Forgive me, I’m a bit too busy to stay and have a chat. So please make it quick.”  

“A gift for me? Christmas isn’t for another few days…hm? It’s for my birthday, oh it appears I forgot all about it again. Thank you for reminding me.”

Voice Lines:

“Once again, it seems like my birthday has come around and surprised me. I suppose that I never truly celebrated it growing up, so it makes sense that I would forget all about it. Of course, nowadays I have two gremlins who love to celebrate it for me.”  

“35 years old…goodness if you had told me 15 years ago that I’d reach this age I would’ve laughed in your face. …Father’s death sent me spiraling so badly that I took job after job, each one more dangerous than the last. A small, dark part of my mind hoped that one of them would do me in. *chuckles softly* Yet here I am still alive and a mother to boot.” 

“Several of my old mentors called today to wish me a Happy Birthday. Some of them even sent gifts surprisingly. None of them could be said to be the most generous of people. Master assassins aren’t usually the type.” 

“It’s been oddly peaceful lately with no sort of trouble coming from either Kaoru or Kanra. *sighs* Why does that stress me out more than if they were causing chaos? Goodness, I never thought I’d appreciate being born with white hair. I just know that if I had any other color I’d be going gray early.”  

“Speaking of going gray early, You’ve been surprisingly quiet, Kaoru, not even a peep coming from inside your lab, something that is extremely unusual coming from you. So I ask what have you done? …Kaoru, the words “hidden project” do not give me a sense of comfort. Don’t believe giving me a gift is going to distract me. We’re coming back to this Kaoru.” 

“Oh, this is quite elegant, Kaoru. You made this? …What did you do? Only you would turn a watch into a deadly defibrillator, Kaoru, but you do know I don't exactly need it to be dangerous? I suppose I’ll add it to the other “tricks” I have up my sleeve then.” 

“There you are, Kanra. You’ve been pretty quiet recently as well. Want to explain to me where you’ve been? Uh, huh, something tells me you’ve been doing more than that. Oh? Let’s see it then. I can only imagine what you got me to spend so much time saving up money for.”   

“Kanra, where did you even get this? Let alone even afford this?! Even at their cheapest, these still run a person $10,000 easily. You’ve been doing what? That is extremely dangerous, and you could’ve gotten hurt. The point is Kanra, you shouldn’t be fighting anyone for money, let alone in a cage fighting ring. You’re not getting off the hook that easily. You’re grounded, Kanra.”

Kaoru Lines:

“Happy Birthday Yuriko…what do you mean? Oh, so just because I was quiet, that means I did something. Well, if you must know, I've been working on a project of mine hidden on the coast of Edogawa’s portion of Tokyo Bay. Don’t worry about it, Yuriko, but if it makes you feel better, I was working on this for you, too.”  

“You bet I did, and guess what? You know my Spider Bites, right? They function pretty similarly. Just press the dial on the side, and it fires a dart that delivers an electrical shock strong enough to disrupt the cardiac system. I know you don’t need any weapons to be dangerous, but better safe than sorry. Think of it as a hidden trick up your sleeve no one will ever expect!”

Kanra Lines:

“Happy Birthday, Yuriko-san! Oh, just out and about, you know. *smiles* I have no idea what you’re talking about. I’ve just been here finishing up your birthday cake. Anyway, I got you something for your birthday! It took me a while to save up for it, but I managed to get you this!” 

“Well about that…I might have spent the last few weeks in an illegal cage-fighting ring. What? Not like any of them could ever beat me! Fine, I’ll stop going out to do cage fighting for money. Now let’s have some of the cake I made you! ...Fuck.”

[burninghorizon]

So last night I went to the mental plane, it was surprisingly easy, but I will say I was incredibly tired and in pain so the act of shutting off my mind's connection to my body was pretty... I want to say smooth like it was lubricated, like being in pain readied me for it. Anyway, I see why reality shifters find this so enticing, it's quite a visceral experience, and definitely feels real. I had a first person view and everything was so tangible, I spent the first minute or so just walking around touching things, the sensory experience was more visceral than bilocation, but not as vivid as a lucid dream astral projection(I miss doing those...)

Anyway, I was in a large sunroom, full of plants. And I wasn't alone, although in a sense I was. There was the other me there. I know her, the version of me that has untangled herself from all the trauma. She's mature, confident, disciplined, independent. Meanwhile I'm a tangle of anxieties and fears running the same loops of traumas in my mind like how a footpath gets worn into the ground by years of people walking it. We're the same person but also not. This isn't our first time meeting. We talked for a little while but it wasn't really a conversation. You know how when you and someone else are on the same wavelength so you happen to say the same thing at the same time? Yeah, it was that. Except she's wonderful and I'm a mess, and she says things I need to hear and I say things because I need to make them permanent in my mind, like a brand.

Eventually I felt my body relax and I drifted into dreamless sleep.

This is probably what reality shifters are experiencing when they think they're actually going to another physical reality. The subconscious mind is excellent at processing and correlating information, something the conscious mind has varying degrees of success with. I suspect the subconscious mind doesn't need rest the way the conscious mind does because it's in a constant state of zen. I remember when I was doing my daily zen meditations I felt so well rested all the time and I was only getting 6 hours of sleep, not because I was under-sleeping but because I was going to bed and just waking up after 6 hours and I felt fine. But anyway, the objectively better version of me is in my mind because my subconscious knows how to be that person. And the reason that all felt so real was because it was basically a dream state.

[elvenbeard]

omg i wanna know more about vince's arasaka ex-boyfriend! he looks cute! hope he's not a dick. but then again you gotta be a certain level of dick to survive in arasaka so maybe im setting myself up. do the other co-workers know or was it a hush-hush thing?

AAHHH!!! öashdfafd thanks so much for asking!!! BETTER BUCKLE UP, this is gonna be long and angsty xDD

(putting his not-100%-polished or canon appearance here again cause I like having pics with my long posts XD)

Okay so... his name is Shou, like Vince he is half-Japanese, but he actually grew up and spent the majority of his life in Japan. He comes from a similar background as Vince, too, corpo-family with ties to Arasaka, excellent education, good grades, a little bit of an outsider even, but he never intermittently left the corpo world like Vince did. He got his entry-level position job at Arasaka fresh out of university and has been (outwardly) loyal and obedient ever since, rising in ranks in no time.

He's roughly 10 years older than Vince, and in 2074 gets transferred to Night City from Tokyo, to help with the expansion of the Counterintel department there. Technically he's on Jenkins' level, experience- and skill-wise, but since everything works a bit differently in Night City, for the time being he ends up a part of Jenkins' team on a level with Vince. It would've been Jenkins' duty to show Shou the ropes actually, but he delegates the task to good old Agent V instead, and that's how they first properly get to know and work with each other.

Let's just say, there is definitely an instant curiosity/interest and base-level of attraction from both sides XD Vince and Shou work well together, share a lot of common interests, have similar ambitious personalities, (both of them are a little bit of a dick, really), and inevitably they also spend a lot of time together. The one thing that Vince is most interested in though, that Shou always seems to avoid answering directly, is why he volunteered to come to Night City from Tokyo. Most people V knows that are striving to rise to the top would wish for it to be the other way around. Shou is always like "I wanted a change of scenery", "I wanted to broaden my horizon", "It looks good on my resume to be in the teamlead of this project" and so on, but none of that feels 100% genuine and so Vince keeps his walls up and tries to maintain a professional distance, despite really liking him otherwise. Emphasis on "tries", cause Shou is not making it easy for him either xD

Some time passes, Vince is still adamant about not wanting a relationship with a coworker (also because he is low-key worried if he lets someone into his life too closely, they might discover he's in contact with Jackie and leaking very classified company secrets to him now and then). But still, one evening Shou and him end up alone at a bar together and one thing leads to another...

Initially their relationship was definitely more on the hush-hush side, not because they were ashamed of it or anything, but because Vince didn't want to be blamed with treating Shou favorably over the others in his team because he was sleeping with him. As time went on though the others definitely caught on, and there was a little bit of drama and bad blood, but nothing they didn't know how to deal with. They had to make it official towards Jenkins and the head of the department at the time soon-ish after becoming a thing anyway though, to not run into problems on that side either, but it went surprisingly smooth. Vince actually was very very happy at the time and wouldn't have figured to ever find someone he'd click so well with that he started to imagine a long-lasting future together.

Long story short though... It never came to that. I mentioned in the lore post that their relationship ended abruptly and bitter, and yeah. Let's just say, Shou hadn't come to Night City for a change of scenery, but as part of an elaborate plan he'd been setting up for years to get out of Arasaka for good, make a bunch of money in the process, and disappear from the face of the earth. Fuck off to somewhere where they'd never be able to track him down, the Soviet Union or something like that. He hadn't planned on genuinely falling in love with Vince though.

Aware that Vince was (apparently) very loyal to Arasaka, he also knew it would need some effort to convince him to come along with him, leave everything behind for good and start over somewhere new. So, what's his idea here? Make it seem like Vince is leaking info to a competing corp by messing with his computer and files. He abused Vince's trust to basically force him to come with him, cause at the press of a button he'd be able to notify Jenkins of Vince’s “betrayal” and he would have no other choice but to run away. Vince figures this out accidentally, and just briefly before Shou can set him up in a way so that there would’ve been no turning back. Since Vince is *actually* leaking company info, just not to a corp but his best friend whose safety he’s now also extremely scared for, he kind of has to make a choice between “run away with the love of my life” and “run to Jenkins and tell him about the setup before Shou can go through with his plan”. And he ends up choosing Jenkins out of loyalty to Jackie.

Let’s just say… the ensuing chaos did not end well for neither Shou nor Vince, but at least Vince walks out of it somewhat alive. Shou never felt in the wrong btw (and really, he was not wrong to want to get himself and Vince out of Arasaka asap). He did what he did out of love, genuinely convinced it was the only thing and the right thing he could've done. Best, most loving intentions, worst possible execution.

(one day, when I have Vince in NPV format, be ready for gut-wrenching VP of all of this. I'M NOT OKAY ABOUT THEM. Also, imagine the very awkward convo with Kerry later on that starts with "So, I told you everything about Louise... now how did your last relationship end?")

[johnmurphysgirl]

Edit by @irresponsibear

Title: PSYCHO – JOHN MURPHY

THE HOURS FEEL LIKE DAYS. If it weren't for the guards coming to check on her every couple hours, she's afraid she'll run out of time. Ainsley Ashter has spent the last five years in Solitary confinement. The silence alone was enough to drive anyone mad, let alone someone like her. Five long exhausting years spent staring at four walls, with nobody but herself for company. Even the guards wouldn't speak with her unless they had no choice. 

Not that she blamed them. How do you look at someone who murdered their own parents brutally, with nothing but the metal post of her bed, and her bare hands? The easiest answer? You don't. 

She heaves a sigh, half laying, half sitting on her cot, her elbows propped up so her head rests in her palm. Her other hand simultaneously pulls at a string located on the thin blanket. Any time now, she'll be pulled from her room, and dragged down the corridors until they reach the air lock. From there, she'll be locked inside until Jaha presses a button, and then she'll be sucked out to space. A supposed instantaneous death awaits her. 

Keeping busy is the only way Ainsley knows to keep the demons at bay. Well, as long as she could. She's in the process of pulling one of the strings in the threading loose, when she hears the thudding of boots hitting just outside her cell. The door squeaks open forcefully, followed by four guards entering quickly. Each looking more nervous than the next. 

"Prisoner 179, turn and face the wall!" The guardsman, Walker, shouts leaving no room for arguments. 

Ainsley does as she's told. She knows the inevitable fate that awaits her, and there's not really any sense in fighting it. At least now she'll find out what it's like to die. If there's anything on the other side; if there were some truth to May we meet again. 

God, she hopes not. 

"So, what are my chances of having a last supper?" Ainsley mutters sarcastically from her position facing the wall, but not one guard dared to answer her. It's easy to assume it's because they are all afraid that she'd lash out, but the truth is; she accepts it. Her destiny. 

Guardsman Nikolas is surprisingly the first person to approach her from behind, albeit a little hesitant. Ainsley doesn't even have a chance to react, before he's shoving a needle in the side of her neck. The effects of the sedative work quickly as the world around Ainsley blurs. The last thing she remembers is the stinging sensation of something on her wrist. 

★──────────★

A groan leaves her lips simultaneously while her eyes flutter open. Once her eyes adjusted, she took notice of people strapped to seats in some kind of dropship. Some were awake, and some still trying to shake off the aftereffects of the sedative the guards used. Some has even taken the liberty to stare at Ainsley horror-struck. Out of solitary for five damn minutes and she already missed the silence. 

"Prisoners of the Ark, hear me now." Chancellor Jaha's voice rang out, coming from a monitor in the center of the dropship. His head held high, and it was at this moment that realization struck Ainsley. He's sending them to Earth. "You've been given a second chance, and as your Chancellor, it is my hope that you see this as not only a chance for you, but a chance for all of us, indeed for mankind itself." 

She frowns at Jaha's words, not really understanding how it's a second chance when he's sending them to a radioactive planet that's been uninhabitable for nearly a hundred years. Yet they call her a psychopath. Ainsley can't help but see the humor in it, as she scoffs. 

"We have no idea what's waiting for you down there," Jaha continues. "If the odds of survival were better, we would've sent others. Frankly, we're sending you because your crimes have made you expendable." 

"Oh, for the love of God and all that is holy, really? Does he actually believe this bullshit?" Ainsley scoffs, letting out a bitter chuckle. "Me, I can see it. Others? Not so much."

 A few heads turn her way, but they are quickly drawn away by a guy yelling further down the dropship. 

"Your dad's a dick Wells!" 

Wells.. Wells Jaha? Wow. Seems like the Chancellor himself sent his own son to die. Ainsley isn't surprised that one sentence is enough to send the delinquents into a fit of laughter. 

Ainsley shakes her head, and goes back to brooding. Her eyes sweep over the delinquents, before looking back up at the screen. The Chancellor's face causes her to roll her eyes again. He really seemed to believe the bullshit coming out of his own mouth. It infuriates her, and she doesn't even know why.

 

"Those crimes will be forgiven," Jaha continues after a pause. "Your records wiped clean. The drop site has been chosen carefully. Before the last war, Mount Weather was a military base built within a mountain. It was to be stocked with enough non-perishables to sustain three hundred people for up to two years." 

"Spacewalk Bandit strikes again!" 

"Woo!" 

"Go Finn!" 

The shouts coming from various delinquents causes Ainsley's head to abruptly spin in their direction. Her eyes land on who she assumes must be Finn, the space walk Bandit, who is currently hovering in the air. It's stupid of him, to be doing something so reckless. Even she, who had been locked up for five years, knows exactly what will happen when they reach the Earth's atmosphere. 

He will slam against the wall. The force of the impact probably killing him on the spot if he's lucky. If he's not, well, he will suffer before he dies. Either way, the end result will be the same. Ainsley can't help but be curious about what will happen to him after he's dead. Is there an afterlife, or would who he is never have mattered at all? 

Finn floats towards the Chancellor's son himself, Wells Jaha, and a blonde girl Ainsley doesn't actually remember. Unfortunately, Ainsley can't hear the few short words that were spoken, but judging by the expression on Wells' face, it isn't pleasant. Finn is smiling, almost tauntingly, his eyes darting between Wells and the blonde with ease.

"Stay in your seats!" The girl exclaims in the direction of two young boys who thought it would be alright to float around like Finn is. 

The boys ignore the blonde's advice, and almost immediately following, the turbulence starts. It rocks the dropship with such ferocity that Ainsley is already preparing for death. That doesn't stop her from gripping her seat so tight her knuckles are turning white. The screams of the other delinquent fill her ears along with the slamming of bodies against the wall. Her heart beat so loud that Ainsley's afraid of it exploding out her chest. 

The crash jerks Ainsley's head so fiercely that it slams into the boy beside her, the pain enough to make both of them hiss and curse. His head jerks away from hers almost immediately as if he'd been burned, after realizing who she actually is, before he leans far enough away from her and closer to his friend. A deranged scoff escapes her lips. It doesn't take her long to be drawn to the bodies on the ground of the boys who wouldn't listen to the girl. Ainsley morbidly wonders if it would be frowned upon to study them, but figures most-likely it would be so she doesn't. 

Ainsley's seat belt retracts by itself. Ignoring the pang in her head, she stands from her seat and follows the moving delinquents towards the ladder to get to the lower level. Time to see if the remainder of the delinquents would die from radiation, or if this truly is their second chance. Ainsley climbs down the ladder as quickly as she can, and pushes her way to the front of the crowd growing by the doors. Ainsley ignores the whispers surrounding her appearance. It's only a matter of time before they decide she doesn't belong. 

"Stop! The air could be toxic," the blonde from earlier shouts, doing the same as Ainsley pushing herself to the front. 

"If the air is toxic, we're all dead anyway," the man states. He's wearing a guards uniform, but Ainsley doesn't remember ever seeing him on the Ark. 

"Bellamy?" A dark haired girl pushes her way to the front, confusion and awe lacing her features as she approaches him. It's like caution drifted out in the wind when she rushes forward and places her arms around him, his doing the same. 

"My God, look how big you are." Bellamy smiles affectionately. 

"What the hell are you wearing?" The girl takes a tiny step backwards, her nose scrunching up in disgust as she looks over his clothing choice in disdain. "A guard's uniform?" 

"I borrowed it." Bellamy reassures her. "To get on the dropship. Someone has to look out for you." 

Ainsley watches the scene with only mild interest. To be perfectly honest, all she wants is those doors to open. To finally know whether they all will end up like the boys upstairs, or if they'll live. 

"Where's your wristband?" The blonde demands towards Bellamy. 

"Do you mind?" The girl standing next to Bellamy glances at the blonde in annoyance. "I haven't seen my brother in a year." 

"No one has a brother!" 

"That's Octavia Blake! The girl they found hidden under the floor!" 

Ainsley whistles slowly as Octavia tries to lunge forward to get to whoever said that, her face red in anger. In all honesty, Ainsley hopes to see a fight. It doesn't come to one, because Bellamy doesn't let it. He holds Octavia back from the crowd. Bellamy, in not so many words, tells Octavia that they'll give the delinquents something else to remember her by. 

About how grand it'll be to be remembered as the first person on the ground in a hundred years. Ainsley probably should just stay silent, to just watch everything unfold without giving the delinquents any other incentive to not trust her, but where would the fun in that be? Besides, she doesn't exactly know how to keep quiet. Being in the sky box with nobody but herself to talk to, well, she can't stop herself from talking now. 

"It's ninety-seven, actually," Ainsley says, loud enough for all the delinquents to hear. The ones closest to her took a step backwards, leaving just her and the blonde in front of the Blake siblings. The whispers started again, though this time about her, and realization dawned on Octavia. Ainsley could see it in her face. The glare is wiped off and replaced by apprehension. 

Bellamy stares at Ainsley, albeit a bit confused. He can't understand how she could be as insane as others on the Ark have said. He looks over her facial features for only a fraction of a second to be more inconspicuous, and shakes his head. She looks seemingly normal. Her soft features give off an appearance of innocence, one that even reminds him of Octavia. This is a problem he'll have to address soon, but not now. For now, he reaches his hand up to the lever, and pulls. 

The doors to the dropship open slower than Ainsley would like, and she has to put her hands over her eyes to block the onslaught of the sun's violent rays. Once she doesn't have pink dots lining her vision, she takes her first look at their new planet. It's green. The most vibrant shade of green she has ever seen. The sky's the most beautiful shade of blue with white clouds at various intervals throughout the sky. She's pulled away from looking at the trees, when Octavia begins making her way down the platform. One foot plants firmly into the dirt below, followed quickly by her other foot. Octavia holds her arms out in a 'welcome home' gesture, taking in a deep breath. 

"We're back, bitches!" 

This is all that's needed for the delinquents to cheer and scream and race off the dropship, and around the vivid forest. All except for Ainsley. Instead of cheering around like a lunatic, she simply moves to the edge of the platform and sits down. She's filled with a nameless dread as she watches them run around in absolute glee. 

How long will it take before they cast her aside like she's nothing? It's the only thing that keeps her from enjoying the new world around them. Ainsley can already tell Earth is going to be a lot more pain than it's worth. 

What if, after all these years spent alone, she is as insane as everyone thinks she is? The years have not been kind. Her life has never been kind. So why the hell would it start now? 

Read it here

[forevernwonder]

I first made a tumblr when I was 16. Pregnant with a 25 year old’s child. Absolutely terrified for my future.

Now I’ve made 31 revolutions around the Sun 🌞 the knowledge I’ve gained in the last 14 years gives me a slightly different worldview.

Surprisingly, I find myself to be incredibly similar to my 16 year old self… minus the ignorant faith I put in men who swore up and down to me that they were my friend for genuine reasons…

I know better than that now.

Some other changes:

- my grandma passed away from HepC complications.

- my mom suddenly passed away from depression.

- I got addicted to heroin and got clean. Currently have 10 years of clean time.

- the person I viewed as my soulmate left me for several other ppl / children.

- I’ve spent the last five years in an unhappy relationship that doesn’t serve me.

- I have two cats: a 2 year old male Siamese named Remy (aka Remington), and a 1 year old calico shorthair female named Maya (aka Little Miss, Miss Thang, Baby Girl, etc).

- I’m currently staying with my ex and our other two cats, two male shorthairs. A orange variety named Cheddar, and a beautiful tabby named Stormy-Daniels. We used to have their mother as well, her name is CocoBean MommaCat. But we gave her to my ex Elton’s daughter. As it was her cat originally before she got knocked up.

- currently working for the Timbers soccer stadium. Contracted to work at the NBA stadium on my off season. Which it currently is. I adore my boss. The first time I remember being excited to go to work. I can’t wait for our next season to start and I get to go back to work with my team…

- struggling for the last 4 years with feeling alone. I gained a bunch of weight when the world shutdown & I stopped working. It’s been hard to maintain friendships when I hate the way I look and don’t want anyone to see me.

- rediscovering my obsession with hip hop & music in general. After spending 4 years becoming addicted to YouTube, I’m finally back to listening to music daily. Something that brings me great solace. I can easily slide back into emotions I’ve bottled away.

Tbh I’ve just felt like I want to express myself.

I know the people/person I truly want to connect with wont see this, but it feels better to speak into the void instead of bottling it inside.

[masterkirby]

How do I even

How do I talk, how can I

How to think about my deceased Mother?

I'm terrified of not having enough memories so I don't try to dig in my head for them because they don't come to the surface naturally, instantly. I quite often dream about her, but she's just there, as part of a family situation, just talking, laughing, whatever. No indication on part of my brain that anything, anyone, is amiss.

How can I think about her?

Round features, prominent chin, piercing blue eyes, thin, wavy and frizzy hazelnut hair,

always wearing a long skirt and that type of top that grandmas and aunties here wear, bought in this or that bazarek, ryneczek.

I kept thinking recently about this leather coat she'd wear, but couldn't find it anywhere.

She's been keeping me warm all these years after her death because I'm just going through her coats.

She was a bit taller than me, I never got taller then her, even when I stopped growing.

When I'd hug her, I'd put my chin over her shoulder, so soft and warm.

Dad would buy her chanel 5 during trips abroad, when he'd fly. I have her last bottle on my shelf and sniff it from time to time.

I don't remember her voice and can't find any recordings. I want to find one so, so, so bad. Her laugh, she would be so cheerful, a sun ray (despite her sun allergy)

Although I've mostly been pondering her melancholy over the years, having moved very suddenly to a country beyond the iron curtain, to marry and live with, basically, a stranger. They'd written letters to each other, my mom and dad, before meeting each other in real life. Dad was a uni professor who fled to the United States, she was a country girl, first in her family to go to university and she studied pharmacy. Dad's father was a professor at med school and somehow got them acquainted. Mom had a way of reaching people's private lives, or hearts. I still don't know and have no way of asking now how Dad got to her heart. Recently he told me, prefacing with a "if you've ever wondered how Mom and I ended up together", that they were both deeply heartbroken at the time. But that she was good to him and he wishes he'd been better to her.

So yeah, alone in a foreign country, no knowledge of the language, and her husband turns out to be... well, now we acknowledge he's on the autism spectrum but back then it just looked like anger issues, depressive episodes and spacing out (not caring about everyday stuff).

I remember surprisingly little about her from my childhood. What did we do together?

I remember asking her why she wears diapers (when I found her sanitary pads)

and her giving out food like kabanosy (where did she get those from??) during long car trips

And going to the supermarket with her

And the Polish food store (where we'd get Kinder niespodzianka and torciki wedlowskie)

And I think the video rental was nearby

I remember going to the Badzian family with her, where they had a TV (we didn't have cable) and Tereska and she were crying when the Pope died.

Tereska tried to teach me English before I went to kindergarten but didn't manage to (I acquired it at school but still have no clue how I survived the time before I knew any English).

We would go to the pool sometimes and that's how I learned how to swim, I guess. It was an outdoor pool and she'd love to swim using the frog stroke, always a dark one suit and a beige, wide-brimmed hat. She'd complain about having to shave specifically for the pool.

She never wore make-up so that was something I learned and unlearned on my own.

She had this silly szlafrok type gown, hot pink, over her regular sleeping gown.

I probably spent a lot of time with her in the kitchen. I remember making rice krispie "cake" together and brownies. She would often make ciasto drożdżowe and I'd eat out the kruszonka, both in baked and unbaked form. We also made flubbers and I'm sure she helped me with any school science experiment I had.

There was something with creating a rainbow on the windowpane.

She would love to make us kanapki for dinner which we would make by ourselves, as in she'd prepare various ingredients and we'd make ships out of them or whatnot.

I want to make an omelette like she did someday.

Another speciality of hers were oponki and she'd make them for everyone's birthdays. And the gołąbki and eggplants with cheese and zapiekanki. Her schabowe were the best I ate.

Turns out she never really cooked before getting married so she had cooking classes, but I only know this from stories and pictures.

Zalewajka, rosół, pomidorowa z ryżem, which is interesting because her mom always makes it with noodles.

She had a small garden in the backyard but only really mint grew there from the times that I remember. But she kept a row of beautiful roses out front, just like grandma does. She loved roses best.

She was overall a very romantic and poetic soul, idealistic and dreaming. Open to people and experiences, well, mostly... She was a devout Catholic which is the reason we'd fall out when I was a teenager and young adult. It was hard hearing that pregnancies from r@pe should be carried to term... And that homosexuality is a disease and we should have compassion for those people but pray for their recovery... Yeah ...

This is always the part that makes me pause my reminiscing. As warm and hard-working and caring a person she was, I always arrive at this... confusion. That I can't help but remember her, in my heart, as somewhat cold and narrow-minded and hurtful.

I remember going to her with my problems (some school drama) and hearing that I should go to god for help. Or all our disagreements because I liked going out, partying, drinking alcohol, wearing skimpyish clothing, making out with people, and so on. When I once told her that I'm being bullied by this one girl, she responded that that girl has a tough family situation. I had hellishly low self-esteem for some reason as a kid and now sometimes as well. Always hearing to be modest and give way for others...

Or when they did a 180 on us when our trip to Poland was supposed to be a one-year sabbatical but turned into a "lifetime".

Her lack of trust in me hurt me deeply and I always couldn't help but compare it to the trust I felt from Dad (I have to ask him someday if it was illusory). And I guess I felt that lack of trust in her overprotectiveness. However horrible it sounds to complain, she'd sometimes show up at my middle school with, say, lunch, or something I forgot to take. Imagine my horror as a kid trying to fit in, in a school where people would regularly be bullied for lesser things. Or she'd try to recruit kids for her rosary circles... I cringe. It hurt to be the laughing stock of, well, at least a few classes. It was a big school.

Or she'd always volunteer to supervise trips and school balls and to go to every school year ending and beginning. I feel like crying even now for feeling... ungrateful. But it just wasn't what I needed as a growing person...

She'd once scolded me for not going to an extracurricular class and she'd never let me not go to school unless I was super sick. But she let me stay home a few days once in high school when my anxiety/depression was really kicking in.

I spent most of my middle school outside of home, if not school then roaming with friends, returning late at night. In highschool my views started forming, far from her own, and I was consumed by school life, building a social persona, dating, having (gasp) premarital sex (not that we ever talked about that). She was more and more into the church, spending all her time and worry on problems of the parish community. We grew distant.

I moved out for uni and she soon fell ill. There wasn't enough time to grow back together.

I don't know. I started therapy recently and I repeat to myself, like a mantra, a thing the therapist said:

Sadness isn't something we're born with. It always comes from somewhere.

I don't think my mom was ever a driving force for my sadness but I have been sad ever since I was a kid. What gives?

The therapist says I didn't have my emotional needs met. Maybe? But still, nothing that traumatic happened in my life until my Mom passed away so suddenly.

I wish I could talk to her about what she remembers about me as a kid. Maybe she could help provide the clues to my potential autism diagnosis. I'd want to hear more of her stories and thoughts. I'd love to hear her worries and troubles and be able to help her, as an adult in my own right. I'd love to get tips on running a household from her, cook and bake together.

I feel like I never really got to know her.

[doubleddenden]

I think I'm going to make little posts regarding town, character, and world building ideas for my fan region, Sorigul. Mind you im nowhere near close to the point of makimg maps or anything, but itll be nice to reference if and when i ever do.

Long text and no pictures below

The first town, for instance:

Hay Town- this and a couple other towns will be based a bit on where I spent a bit of my childhood, with Hay Town representing the smallest farm town angle.

It's what you think of when you think of a rural southern town- farms, trees, a small school for all ages to attend (irl these are common here, from kindergarten to senior year- in this case we can slightly adopt the Paldea method and expand a little further), a post office, some convenient stores, a gas station, a small diner, a creek, a train station, a few churches (we'll narrow it down to 1, but its quite common to see 1 every couple of miles), a cemetery, power lines, and some nosy and abrasive but otherwise cooperative and somewhat friendly neighbors.

Oh, and curiously, home of both the first gym you face, and the LAST gym you face, but more on that later.

Nothing really happens here usually- in fact, most tend to move from here to a bigger city for better job opportunities, or simply to get away from the sticks and hicks. In fact, you'll have a hard time finding a signal here, so some even leave just for that alone. This is such a nobody town that it's barely on the map- in fact, it doesn't even get MARKED as a town on the map until certain story events happen rather quickly.

This is one of those towns where everyone knows each other, so expect to be tattled on if old lady Jean sees you and your friends ditching class to go hang out at a pond. At the same time, it's an excellent place to hide from the outside world, since nobody has heard anything about this town on the outside. A few high profile members of regional society even relocated here, just to find peace from the hustle and bustle.

Speaking of friends, you'd have a small circle of good friends- you're in your senior year of school, meaning you and your friends will soon graduate and move on with your lives. You are more or less a neutral person- not a loser, but not exactly popular either. You blend in and get by, which some would argue is a nice position to take in school, while others would scold you for not trying putting yourself out there more. You have friends, you have enemies, a normal and average student- your grades depend on a small test you'd take that doesn't really affect much other than some dialog choices. Of course, your appearance and gender are up go you ideally- surprisingly nobody gives a shit about that stuff here in this fictionalized southern town, but they are pretty judgy of the fact that you're all but mute for the most part (standard Pokemon Protagonist syndrome, nothing new) and some might judge you for not wanting to inherit your father's farm.

But enough about that, your friends need SOME introduction.

To begin with, your very best friend you have known since you were babies is a guy named Dray- son of the 8th gym leader and former champion of the region, Clark. Despite coming from such a heritage... Dray is timid, shaky, and not really sure of himself. He's the bottom of the food chain here, spending a good chunk of his life being bullied or beaten up for his lineage. He does fine enough in academics, and of course excels in Battle studies and type matchups, but most still think he won't amount to much due to his anxiety and failure in practical battling exams. Still, he's your best friend for a reason. He considers you like a sibling, and always acts himself around you- that is, a bit of a jokester, kind hearted, a bit cowardly to ghosts and bullies but still brave where it counts, and someone you can count on to have your back in a fight or in your farm chores, where he's also worked most of his life with you. He has big dreams, dreams you and he both wished upon shooting stars to fulfill when you were little: that someday you'll both become the strongest trainers in the world, and show everyone that you're not just class nobodies.

Hannah, another friend, is a quiet, shy, reserved girl who also faced bullying for her pedigree- that being that her older sister is the CURRENT champion. Compared to your other friends, she only moved here a couple years ago to escape the paparazzi and targeted harassment from her peers- but your group still adopted her and look after her. She's rather gentle with Pokemon, preferring not to battle at all and considering opening a Pokemon Nursery someday- she has such a way with Pokemon that even aggressive sorts such as Tauros become soft and docile with just a touch. She also works on your farm with you and Dray, and you've had wonderful summers together with the Farm Pokemon. She is a target if bullying, but somehow Dray finds courage to stand up for her despite being scared- perhaps because he understands her situation. Although others wouldn't dare say it, Hannah thinks that Dray is one of the coolest guys ever, and that you have such a way with Pokemon that she thinks her sister will have fierce competition.

Your other friends will depend on the genders you didn't pick:

Tobias- the boy character- is an expert on Pokemon breeding and an overall cheery guy that believes in hard work- kinda has golden retriever energy, and is the mom friend. He's not much for battling, but he's a natural at understanding their diets, habits, egg groups, and even grooming habits. He's also a farm kid, but works on his uncle's farm across town. He's surprisingly popular among girl students, but is painfully oblivious to any all advances- but he does have eyes for one person (either you or Ruth).

Ruth- the girl character- is an expert Pokemon Rider. She's a tomboy that has already seen years of competition from riding Rapidash, Tauros, even Dodrio in a rodeo setting, and has even wrestled with Miltank and Grumpig. She's a cheery and upbeat person, and probably the most responsible of the friends in your group. She's also more than happy to explore the outdoors and is an excellent Pokemon tracker and berry expert. She's slightly better than Dray in practical battle studies, but not as good as you. Guys across the school think of her as one of the prettiest girls on campus, but she's kinda clueless and has tunnel vision for one person (it's either you or Tobias).

Brett- aka the non binary option- is perhaps the smartest person on campus and has most pokedex entries memorized by heart. They already have a position lined up as a research assistant to the town professor as soon as they graduate, and even has their own pokedex made for the local domestic pokemon and wildlife, although... they're not exactly the most elegant with Pokemon. Pokemon they study might often attack them, as they tend to forgo basic safety precautions to study them up close and personal- they're not actually all that bothered by it, noting that PLENTY of regional professors have gained their best research data from surviving a Thunderbolt or five. They're friendly to you and your friend group, but not quite able to hold back on slight criticisms that they notice. They also are a bit absent of social awareness, avoiding the vitriol and bullying of the school by simply just not understanding when someone is threatening or insulting them, and even has some afraid to bother because Brett will just expose and read their insecurities for filth for all to hear, and once made a bully cry by accident.

Ideally, you'd have a few different skin tone and even fashion options so that each character feels more unique, and you could assign a design to yourself and the other three characters. The rest would appear as students on campus.

The last of your friends is a rather atypical friend and another strange citizen- Professor Tiffany Poincienna, a once transfer student from the nearby tropical region (based on the Bahamas) that excelled in her studies so much that she actually graduated from school and college in her teens, and lives her life in Hay Town as one of the regional professors- this region has 3, and she's the newest and not as experienced, but still earnest in her work. Her field of study is actually that of the recent Armor phenomenon spotted in this region- and by recent, I mean less than a year ago did they surface in the Sorigul region after the mysterious appearance of strange temples across the land. She was simply sent here as a part of her training to document and observe how domesticated pokemon behave differently from wild ones, but her studies shifted when temples rose from the earth in nearby routes, all of which had a set of peculiar chips that affected certain Pokemon. She is committed to learning the mysteries of Armor Evolution and the purposes of these temples, but she is a bit unsure of herself due to her lack of experience. As a friend though, she's a friendly, albeit clumsy girl your age you've known since you were 10. She's aware of any and all gossip in the town (she claims it's for information purposes, but she is quite nosy), and teases you and the others for any romantic feelings you might have for someone- lovingly, of course. To that end, ever since she became a professor around the age of 16, you and your friends have served as her unofficial assistants.

Then of course, every school needs a bully or few.

Towards the beginning of the game, you'd have the option to choose the gender of said bully that would become a rival- the guise is that they're twins late for turning in their graduation papers and it would REALLY help Tiff if you'd help sort this out.

Liz- the girl- is a loud mouth that wants everyone around her to know how much better she is than them. Plenty would agree that she'd be the prettiest girl in school if she simply shut her trap. She doesn't care for formalities or social graces, and almost ran away from home to start her own Pokemon journey before legally able. She's the bully that even town bullies are afraid of, and most steer clear of her or face her kicks. She's more than taken her few swings at Dray and even attempted to harm Hanna, but strangely enough can't seem to bring herself to hurt you. She's a HEAVY tsundere when questioned about it. Strangely enough, she treats her pokemon like babies and refuses to let them lift a paw to help her traverse unless absolutely necessary, preferring to threaten a human to help her or simply doing it herself.

Lyle- the boy- is crude, rude, and has an attitude. During one of your first encounters with him, he told Dray to- ahem, "cease existing," putting it mildly. He prefers quiet, but do not mistake this for friendly or shy behavior- he's been known to beat the shit out of people for looking at him wrong. He's a talented battler and absolutely knows it, and anyone he beats he bullies for lunch money. He even has some teachers scared, only continuing to go to school because he got caught by the law for trying to run away from home. If he deems you weak, he will target you in school, out of school, and only stops when you're home- as seen with Dray and Hannah. Strangely, he either ignores you or purposely avoids eye contact with specifically you- if pressed, he'll shove you and storm off, but has never actually thrown a punch at you. He's rather lazy and would prefer his Pokemon do the traveling for him, and has even threatened to steal Pokemon from actual trainers, but he does treat them well and reward them for hard work.

Whichever one you don't choose has already run away from home to start a career as a trainer. Both are tough cookies who seem to have a soft spot for you, getting flustered rather easily if you beat them in battle. Their mother is the definition of trailer trash, and their father is absent and unknown.

However, speaking of fathers, let's talk about yours- Johnny, a farmer and former PokeRodeo champion. He's very sentimental and isn't quite ready to see you leave home- the Sorigul Region has a tricky government that raised the age requirement to be a trainer to 18 at minimum for various political reasons, but your Dad still sees you as his little buddy he'd take riding on his Mudsdale or tractor form Revavroom, his baby he taught to befriend and groom pokemon from a young age, his fishing buddy, his cooking assistant, and the light of his life after your mother ran off with a farm hand ten years ago. He's a bit judgemental and wary of those from other regions, and he's very wary of letting you leave home to go on some grand adventures to huge cities across the world. But, he does love you very much and has trouble saying no to you or your friends- unless it involves the temples or staying out after dark without telling him, THEN he puts his foot down. He's content with living a quiet life on his farm with the Pokemon he went on a journey with in his youth, and is glad to help show newer youths the joys of farm life- but even HE understands that you have your own life to live and will leave the nest someday, and to that end, he even prepared some Pokemon for you and your friends to take with you. These WOULD have been your first Pokemon, were it not have been for an incident in which you obtained your TRUE starters. He wanted to give you regional Johto starters, since he remembered you had a poster of them on your wall as a kid and found a reputable breeder for them.

More at a later date