#foreverinwonderland

[forevernwonder]

I first made a tumblr when I was 16. Pregnant with a 25 year old’s child. Absolutely terrified for my future.

Now I’ve made 31 revolutions around the Sun 🌞 the knowledge I’ve gained in the last 14 years gives me a slightly different worldview.

Surprisingly, I find myself to be incredibly similar to my 16 year old self… minus the ignorant faith I put in men who swore up and down to me that they were my friend for genuine reasons…

I know better than that now.

Some other changes:

- my grandma passed away from HepC complications.

- my mom suddenly passed away from depression.

- I got addicted to heroin and got clean. Currently have 10 years of clean time.

- the person I viewed as my soulmate left me for several other ppl / children.

- I’ve spent the last five years in an unhappy relationship that doesn’t serve me.

- I have two cats: a 2 year old male Siamese named Remy (aka Remington), and a 1 year old calico shorthair female named Maya (aka Little Miss, Miss Thang, Baby Girl, etc).

- I’m currently staying with my ex and our other two cats, two male shorthairs. A orange variety named Cheddar, and a beautiful tabby named Stormy-Daniels. We used to have their mother as well, her name is CocoBean MommaCat. But we gave her to my ex Elton’s daughter. As it was her cat originally before she got knocked up.

- currently working for the Timbers soccer stadium. Contracted to work at the NBA stadium on my off season. Which it currently is. I adore my boss. The first time I remember being excited to go to work. I can’t wait for our next season to start and I get to go back to work with my team…

- struggling for the last 4 years with feeling alone. I gained a bunch of weight when the world shutdown & I stopped working. It’s been hard to maintain friendships when I hate the way I look and don’t want anyone to see me.

- rediscovering my obsession with hip hop & music in general. After spending 4 years becoming addicted to YouTube, I’m finally back to listening to music daily. Something that brings me great solace. I can easily slide back into emotions I’ve bottled away.

Tbh I’ve just felt like I want to express myself.

I know the people/person I truly want to connect with wont see this, but it feels better to speak into the void instead of bottling it inside.

[andreakrischke-blog-blog]

Día 2. Vectorizando sintesis de juguete. #ForeverInWonderland #alice #draws #Design #dibujo #vector #illustrator

[galaxyclusters]

 Alice // deux ♥

[stonergirl]

foreverinwonderland replied to your photo: last night i dreamed about making out with lindsay...

You are such a badass, Kym.

but i wish <33

[whenpanicattacks-blog]

foreverinwonderland replied to your post: How can you love yourself when you absolutely hate...

you are a magnificent woman. you are stunning, and beautiful. don’t feel too badly about yourself, lady.

You are too kind, Alice <3

I'm trying~

[bis-aufs-messer]

ionblackhood hat auf dein Foto geantwortet: Bad mood. I’m up way too early. It’s raining....

“I fear that my soul’s chased the dragon down a rabbit hole Sadistic cycle we tumble down the rabbit hole.”

Listened to this only minutes before! :D

foreverinwonderland hat auf dein Foto geantwortet: Bad mood. I’m up way too early. It’s raining....

how early is too early?

8 is too early. Actually everything before 10 is too early..

meduzaproject hat auf dein Foto geantwortet: Bad mood. I’m up way too early. It’s raining....

hier scheint ja die sonne :O

saaaauerrei! Nur noch ein Grund warum ich dich eigentlich besuchen sollte! :O

[galaxyclusters]

Alice  (◡‿◡✿)

[caspiancircle]

foreverinwonderland replied to your post: I don’t know what the fuck’s been with...

I have the same problem with recalling dreams as soon as I awaken… And I am positive they are locked in my head. I just have to coax them out.

Yes! This is an incredibly precise statement. I want to learn how to coax them out.

[stonergirl]

foreverinwonderland replied to your post: woahhh

were you in your archive? i had a shit load of posts repost one time when i was working in my archive.

uuuuug yes...and it keeps doing it. what the crap man?

[galaxyclusters]

foreverinwonderland replied to your post: Read More →

mentally ill… i can’t stand to be viewed as a lesser creature because of my mind.

Neither can I. Really, we're on a different level of human consciousness and in that I see something beautiful. It can be quite horrifying, but it is still quite a wondrous experience. 

and I love you <3

[myindoorgardencenter]

Miss Lois - Day 7 of flowering

[stonergirl]

Tumblr Crushes:

nirvikalpa

oscardeegrouch

explicitsubstance

lucifelle

foreverinwonderland

howtofuckthepainaway

disgustinghuman

bitwisexor

tastefulsin

posting this because the sesame street icons :)