#like this is the drama where she had a miscarriage

[icarusredwings]

Baby Eveyln small update

Tw: Mentions of miscarriage, child loss, voices, mental illness, argueing.

Logan is starting to get worried. A little too worried. Some of the things he is saying make far too much sense, the way he holds the baby, becoming way too serious to be simply coping. If anything, Evelyn was making him cope less, forcing him to spend most of his time with her, taking her to the park, taking her to the store, and even to work. It was getting to the point where Eve was "crying" during class and began to freak out some of the students.

"..but.. Mr. Wade.. she's a toy."

"She's crying!"

The silence was loud to them, but not to Wade, who was now on paid suspension for two weeks to try to settle his mental state but now Wade couldn't even sleep without the doll. He didn't laugh as much anymore. He didn't take many merc jobs anymore. Hell- he didn't want to take any jobs at the moment, even bringing up the idea of being a stay at home dad. This, of course caused an argument.

"Wade, you cant be a stay at home dad if we don't have any kids! If you want to take a break thats fine, but you can't use her as an excuse, shes... shes plastic, honey. You need to realize that. Shes not real. You are making the crying on your own."

"I'm not! An-and she IS crying!"

"All she does is cry apprently! It's not healthy, Wade. Something is wrong!"

"She laughs too! S-she giggles at me! It's real! I-i can hear it!" He cries, still holding the doll in his arms, yelling back like a tired mother in a Drama who just found out her husband was cheating.

"If you don't want to be part of this family.. t-Then don't! Leave us alone! Go! She dosn't need a father like you anyway!" He screams, wearing nothing but his silk nightie robe and a pair of boxers... storming off into their room.

Slamming the door..

So, It leads him to consult an expert in Wade's manic depressive episodes. Vanessa. Wade mentioned them both taking parenting classes to see if they were ready for a kid but the way Wade was describing it... there may have already been one.. Infact that's why he called her here.

At first, he pitter pattered around the subject. Lightly implying, and then beat around the bush, beating the bush finally when she ignored the question, acting as if she hadn't heard. Logan knew already by her avoidance, but he needed her to confirm. To be sure.

"Were you... ever pregnant?..while with Wade, I mean.." It's a whisper, in the corner of some run down diner. He had bought her a piece of strawberry short cake and a coffee in hopes to soften things over, he himself a coffee and buttered pancakes.

"What? No.. why would you think that?" She says, but looks away, quickly taking a drink of her coffee, looking longingly out the window.

"...Ness.."

She glances at him with such wide eyes, frowning. "What is it, Logan?"

"I won't tell him." He states, watching as she swallows, looking around before whispering.

"...It would destroy him."

That's what Logan thought. An internal sigh washed over him as he glances down at the table. "I know.. but with Eve-"

"That stupid babydoll he carries around to torture me with? What about her?" She grunts, by now her eyes teary, begining to look at the ceiling, clearly angry that she couldn't have what she wanted, and yet Wade could play with the doll.

Ooh... that made sense as to why Vanessa wouldn't play mommy and daddy with him. His brows crease upwards, head lowering as he looks at her with such sympathy. "Yeah....Why didn't you tell me? I can put her up when you visit.. so.. It's not as painful..."

"He can't know. No one can know. If he found out, he'd-" Her throat tightens, cutting off as she took a deep breath, now staring at him in his eyes, serious and biting her tounge.

"...Promise me."

"I won't tell him... I promise." Taking a napkin, he passed it to her. "I just.. I need to know what's going on so I can get him help. By helping me, you're helping him." He whispers, letting things sit like that for a while, silently starting to eat his food, waiting patiantly.

Finally, Vanessa took a breath. "Don't let this be for nothing.."

"I won't...Do you know if anyone else could possibly-"

Vanessa gave him a glare. One that said 'Ive been engaged to this bastard for 10 years and you think he has a kid with someone else?'

So Logan nodded. "Got it."

But now this leads Logan to wonder... Did Wade deserve to know? It was his kid afterall...

[khaotunng]

Once again, just because Flower Of Evil did the amnesia trope in the last episode really well and heartbreakingly doesn’t mean anyone can pull it off🚬🚬

[merlinssassybeard]

'Ex' Husband Gojo

Tags- fem reader x Gojo, swearing, angst.

Synopsis: The reader had a miscarriage and her husband wasn't there with her to give her support and now she's mentally shaken. Y/n decides to divorce him and but things take a way different turn...

Gojo and reader are married for 4 yrs and love each other profoundly but a terrible accident happened with reader and caused reader a miscarriage and was going through a very bad time. Reader wanted Gojo there to help mentally and emotionally but he was busy with curses...

"Satoru", you began with a shaky voice.

Your husband Satoru Gojo had all your attention the moment you said his name.

You had called up Satoru to the Tokyo estate, your marital home, for 'an important emergency talk'. These words were enough for Gojo to run from his busy packed schedules to run home to check up on you.

"Hmm?", Satoru hummed indicating you he's all ears. Both seated opposite to each other in the kitchen.

"Satoru, i-", you hesitated but continued, " Satoru, i want divorce...."

At first, he was unresponsive, still processing whether the words he heard were real or some weak residual cursed technique from cursed spirits left on him considering he came right after finishing a mission.

"Divorce?" Satoru came to his senses, "is this... some sort of.. joke my love MRS y/n? Cus' I'm really not liking it!", he tried to laugh it off.

But this wasn't a joke.

Not for you.

You're done.

Done giving him all of everything you have and receiving none.

You had your head slightly bowed down, unable to summon the energy, the strength to look right into his eyes. "This is not a joke, Satoru Gojo.", "i cannot live like this anymore".

Satoru knew it was indeed serious by the tone of it so he's demeanor changed as well.

"Why is it so y/n?", he mumbled in his soft husky voice while extending his hand towards yours to hold. "Is it something i did? You know you can tell me. I told you beforehand marrying me wasn't going to be easy, you remember?"

Yes he is right. He did told you a bazillion times when you nagged him for marriage anytime and everytime you saw him breathing around you. He had told you enough times that being his wife and also in a conservative society isn't going to be a cakewalk. 'Once married, there is no way out of the marital bond since its a holy bond, blessed by the heavens themselves' or as they said, but you didn't care, at that time.

"Reasons don't matter.", you flinched your hands away from his approach and passed the envelope with the papers and got up. "You'll find my signatures in there. Please be civil. Don't want any drama."

Satoru didn't knew what to say since he didn't even expected such a devastating and mind boggling news either. He had just finished his mission overseas and had taken only an hour of rest before being assigned another 'clean up' duty (messed/botched mission by another sorcerer) and in the middle of it he gets your call for an emergency meet up at the house.

He has been working all around the clock and came home to see you, hoping to receive kisses or you expecting souvenirs, which he had plenty just for you. But instead he got this ..... a farewell?

Gojo stayed seated there, watching you leave the kitchen to the room. He stayed seated there for a moment wondering what did he do, where did he go wrong, did he go wrong? Are you alright? Is this a cry for help? Is everything okay with you?

He wanted to check up on you so he got up to head towards the bedroom where you were but stopped dead in his tracks when it hit him, the reason....

"Y/n", you heard the door slide open and Gojo calling your name.

He opened the door and saw you were.... packing? God, you're really not joking.

"Yes?", you gathered the strength to look up at him for the first time in months! Due to his 'business trips' and you swear to god you would have fell down crying as your knees went weak.

"Is it...", he stumbled to say further but he knew he had to confront you with this, "is it because of that thing we talked about? On the phone?"

You knew you will burst out crying in front of him if he talked any further and because of that you couldn't speak either, holding tight onto lips to avoid the tears.

"Uh huh mmmhh mmmhh" you nodded and tried to avoid eye contact.

Oh no! Satoru knew he messed up. But he couldn't just let you... leave!? How could he? He knows and you too, that you are the only person who makes him vulnerable to the point he acts like child, only with you. You are the only one who actually makes him happy and content with his life in this miserable shite world. No words describe your and his relationship. So just how could he just let you leave?

"Y/n. I get it. You want kids." He mumbles, "then we'll have kids! Okay?" He declared.

You looked at him, and when he said that he looked as if he's been held under gun point, reluctant, yet... determined?

No! Yes, you do want children but the role of a father cannot be forced upon a man! That way the child will only be a 'burden' rather than a child born out of love and acceptance.

"No need." You announced and turned your back to him and started putting your clothes in the bag. "My mind can't be changed"

Gojo was left puzzled. He is ready to give you what you had been asking the day you both got married, what his and your parents wanted and the entirety of the Jujutsu Society had a keen eye on.

"I can't let you leave y/n like this", he said not knowing what to do either.

"Okay, I'll put on some fresh clothes.", you replied unbothered.

"No y/n i I told you once you're married you can't!", Satoru tried to come up with some reasoning.

"How the FUCK i cannot?" You yelled right onto his face, throwing the dress in your hand on the floor, annoyed at everything and anything.

"You just CAN'T!", Satoru tried to hold his sanity together.

"I AM FUCKING LEAVING! Divorce or NOT!", You snapped at him and went to pick the dress up and put it in the bag.

"Listen y/n, we can't go with divorce, it'll cause a lot of talk in the family and there's more but we just can't...", he tried to reason with you calmly but you were not in the mood.

"Why do you suddenly want me in your life when from the past fucking 4 years all you have done is being out on your trips?" You sneered and mocked, "Announcing we're going to have kids! Wow! That's not how it works Satoru!"

Satoru now lost it.

"Then what IS IT YOU WANT!? Haven't i given enough? You wanted this marriage! Not me! But i went for it because it was you! Went against my family for you and kept you away from them but what do you care" (your in-laws are toxic and would love to dance over your grave)

"Thats because i refuse to be your whore! You called me up whenever you felt like it. Might as well be your wife rather than just be some whore you sleep with on friday nights."

You recognized what you just babbled out and its disgusting. Your hands involuntarily moved and covered your mouth. You couldn't ever fathom the words you puked.

It is NOT like that! Not at all! You love Satoru, you Have been for a long time! And to have him as your husband is a dream come true! But how could say such lowly things.

Satoru just stood there. It was like one explosion after the other. So that is it? You came to him... for looks? For money? For sex? Goddammit! Satoru wanted to laugh because women of his family warned him not to marry some average human girl, saying further that you'll rob him of his money one day. But he didn't and just stood there watching the horror in your eyes unfold.

Satoru saw you as the only person in his life that made him actually understand the definition of love. Especially someone human, a non sorcerer like you. Thought of you made him content and calm, knowing he has someone waiting for him...... but not anymore.

He rubbed his temple as he'd been without an eye covering this whole time and his head ached a little with all this drama unfolding. He smiled through and looked at you, "that's what you think of me y/n?"

"No-no Satoru! Thats not what meant! Ugh! I don't want the divorce anymore!-"

He interrupted, "ah its okay, totally okay. I'll sign em."

Gojo was awfully calm and collected and you knew that when he's like this he would explode like a volcano if irked.

"No i will not let you!" You screamed and pushed him and ran out of the room in a frenzy to retrieve the divorce papers and tore the sections with your signature into tiny unrecognizable trash.

Satoru walked into the kitchen and just stood there. "You can have this house. I'll have Ijichi send down some papers later."

You eyes widened, "what..... papers?"

"Separation papers", he replied.

His gaze went around the house randomly and said, "since you don't wanna be a-" he stop and looks at you but continues.

"Since you do not wish to be a 'whore', you're free from me. I don't want chaos in both of our families so im suggesting separation. Yeah? Works in favor of both of us"

You were shook. You knew what you were doing when you brought the divorce papers but you didn't expected it to become so real.

"I'm leaving now. I'll send for my things so please don't throw my things just yet! Haha." Satoru was throwing jokes at a moment like this.

Damage has been done.

You ran out as soon as you saw him leave. You kept saying that its not what you meant and there's more to it and what not. But he just wore his blindfold and got into the car.

You saw him shut the door on your face and uttered his last words as your husband to you....

"Congratulations, Ms y/n. This'll be the last time you'll see me and when you think you're ready for divorce, lemme know!"

Part 2

Series masterlist

[demonshauntingthedoves]

Rotten

Pairing : Alcoholic/drugaddict Jungkook x female reader

Summary : Jungkook wiped the thick tears on her cheeks while his own slid down. The blood. It wasn't just blood, it was the life you both had created and he had destroyed just moments ago. He had overdone it all. In the daze of anger and alcohol. He had fucked up, he knew. It was your birthday and he had given you his rotten gift.

Warning : Unhealthy Angst, Violence, Physical abuse, slapping, kicking, cursing, arguing, mention of alcohol and drugs, drug abuse, no smut but very slight tension, they have a baby, implied miscarriage, implied killing, Jungkook is insane but tad bit emotional at the end.

WordCount : 2139

Main Masterlist

It was starkly dark, the room was unlit except for the faint glow of the television which casted across the room.

The colours from the screen flickered over your glistening eyes, lashes droopy, deprived of sleep. You rubbed your eyelids with the back of your hand, smearing more of your mascara.

You sat there on the pathetic couch. Your face seemed solemn but you were anything but.

You were enraged.

Absolutely enraged

The only thing that refrained your nerves from bursting was the little baby tucked on your lap. You stroked her little hair as she blithely slept after fisting on your milk. She was the only thing that kept you sane at this point. So you kept her close instead of putting her in the crib.

You sighed heavily, shoulders slumping down making the thin strap of your camisole dangle down your shoulder blade.

Your eyes darted around, falling on the round dining table at the other end of the drawing room. Faint light fell on the tulips, gloom casting on the poor blooms. The candles remained unlit, their purpose and your hopes of having a special candle light dinner going in wane. The food was untouched, by now, cold and covered and so was the cake you had baked with so much love. If this could not depict your ruined dinner, then you didn't know what could.

It was your birthday and you had planned everything down to the last detail. It was a very special evening. You wanted everything to be perfect for the little celebration. You had adorned your babygirl in a cute black dress much similar to your shimmery one and then you had waited in utter excitement and anticipation.

Awaited for your husband's arrival so that you could finally celebrate together.

Waited for Jungkook.

Yet, as the time ticked away, your previous eagerness simmered. Before you knew it, the clock had struck two and Jungkook still hadn’t returned home.Your special day was gone, leaving no souvenirs except the hopelessness grating your insides.

You didn't worry, didn't panic because you were very much aware where he would be. Not like he worked late office hours, he didn't. He didn't need to work in the first place, simply because his parents stuffed his back pockets well. He was a spoiled son. Absolutely rotten. So much that you knew he would be rotting in some high class club, completely and utterly wasted, to remember your birthday or even remember you.

Devastatingly or not, you knew that he didn't care. He didn't care that it was your special day, didn't think it was worth enough to not forget. And you knew he’d forget, so the prior day, you had reminded him, begged him to be present at least this one night and still he wasn't. You were a fool to think he’d prioritize you over his addiction.

You had called and texted him too but they were unanswered, finally your patience had run out and you had thrown your phone and thrown your dress off too.

Anger dripped from your heart. Sad tears stuck to the tip of your lashes. You had never felt so betrayed and you had never welcomed the urge to confront someone as much as you did now.

You neither ate nor slept. Iseul didn't go to sleep either, busy mingling with her toys and engrossed in the drama that played on tv and waiting for her father too. It was later, you decided to put her to sleep when her head nodded off a few times. You resisted to fall asleep, not before the fury of frustration burning in you was extinguished.

You were so done with him, you had always brushed off his mistakes but not this time, you were determined to confront him, even if it made your heart gnawed with unsettling feelings.

It was 13 past 3 when you heard the rustling of keys and door opening. The unpleasant smell of alcohol diffused in air as his dark frame walked in. He just stood there like a black shadow. Instead of questioning him the very moment, you just glared at him as he began to saunter around the room, not sparing you a single glance. Here you were yearning for an explanation, for some sort of apology while he didn't even intend to acknowledge you.

Your eyes stung and throat burned, yet you remained silent, quietly observing him, hearing the jarring of drawers being open and closed in haste, as he rummaged through each of them. Coal black locks tousled and fell all over his face, making him look more grotesque.You clutched the remote and increased the volume, to blur the noises he was making.

He murmured something and you heard it but didn't respond. He murmured again, louder and deeper this time turning his head to you, so he did notice you.

“ I said switch it off “

Why should you though?

You ignored him, glaring at the screen, finding it more interesting than listening to him.You tried not to flinch when he moved closer and bent, snatching the remote and shutting it off before throwing the remote back on the couch.

You silently gasped at his audacity, agitated beyond, you gently laid Iseul down and shifted to get the remote back, stubbornly switching on the tv.

You’d push his buttons too, like he was pushing yours.

In the periphery, you saw him swirl to you, felt his sharp eyes bore into you and next thing you knew the screen blackened. Seems like he ripped the cables off.

You blinked, blinded by the darkness, clutched the arm of the couch. Couldn't look but felt him loom closer. Gulped the tension, gulped the scream when he yanked you up to him. You winced at the feel of his cold rings digging into your skin. His face hovered over yours. Your nostrils grimaced at the heavy smell of liquor and sweat. The fact that he could stand without stumbling, even after being so intoxicated was beyond you.

“Why didn't you put her in the crib?” He rasped, voice sending chills, spurring goosebumps down your body.

“ Coming home at 3, reeking full of alcohol, you see it's you who needs to give an explanation, not me.” you hissed with exhausting anger, you hissed again when cold fingers cupped your chin, tightening and squishing your cheeks.

“Don't talk to me like that, you know I hate it.” Jungkook spat in his drunkenness, clearly on the brink of losing patience.

“ And I hate it too when you do this, you knew it was a special day, but still you fucked it up.” Your eyes glistened, beyond frustrated, fed up with him and his gall to argue with you instead of apologizing straight away, he wasn't regretful at all.

“ I said I fucking hate it when you talk like that.” He gritted lowly, heaving and sniffing, hands trembling with rage.

You tried to wiggle out of his grip, squirming and tripping in your movements but he tugged your face even closer. You stilled when you felt his nose and lips brush yours, fire stirring within you, he thought that you’d let him have his way with you after spoiling your night.

He had to be depraved to think that.

With all your might, you jerked his hand away, making him steer behind. You circled and turned the lamp on, you needed to take Iseul to another room before Jungkook did something rash.

Your hands were about to reach for her but instead retreated towards your hair, which were harshly pulled, wrenched from your scalp, you let out an ugly cry, it was painstaking.

Jungkook harshly whirled you to face him, tattooed fingers clutching your neck in a merciless choke hold. You saw nothing except white dots in your vision due to the strangled throat and agonizing hold on your hair.

“You fucking bitch. You hid my MD, didn't you? You knew I would look for it so you purposely hid it. Fucking give it to me or I swear-” Jungkook gurgled words out, struggling to handle his restlessness.

“I don't- I don't know about it. Leave me.” You whisper shouted at him, gripping his hands that held your throat and hair.

It was just minutes before he returned from the club and he already wanted to indulge in more substance abuse.

Fucking addict.

And over that, Jeon Jungkook had sunglasses on, that too in the middle of the night. How could he see through the shades in so much dark?

Intolerable piece of shit.

You were insufferably annoyed. Even though your knees were trembling from exhaustion and fear, you kept your stand.

“You bastard, you think I'll touch your filth. You’re crazy, really. And wearing those fucking glasses-”

You tried to remove those, trying to swat them off his eyes, ended up doing it with more force. It looked like you slapped him, barely though.

When his eyes met yours, you clearly saw that he had taken the offense. You froze.

“You hit me.”

His breath grew shallower, jaw clenched, deranged eyes piercing through yours dreading ones.

“How dare you fucking hit me?”

He swung his hand and slapped you hard, tugged at your hair with another hand and dragged you and swirled you to throw you in the other corner of the room, which had to be where the dining table was, you gasped in pain when your abdomen hit the side of the table, tears springing in your eyes. You clutched the spot which hurt and fell on your weak knees.

A choked sob escaped your lips as you tried to scramble further in the corner. But a strike came again, when Jungkook got to you. He wasn't done. The slap was far more harsh and hurting, making your ears ring, making your head whip in the direction of the floor.

He wasn't done.

“I told you I hate it when you talk to me like like that, question me like my fucking father.” he growled and kicked your cowering stomach. Ones, twice, thrice and you were out. Unconscious.

He panted heavily looking at your almost dead figure but his mind occupied only one thing. Needed to get it, rushed to take his next dose before he went insane. He searched everywhere, even looked around the stupidly decorated diner. Found a little wrapped thing beautifully sitting on the table, ripped it open with trembling fingers in anticipation, felt his heart beating.

Felt his heart stop.

All adrenal rush disappeared.

All the haze diminished.

In his hand was a little device, the two thin lines gnawing at him.

He turned to stare at your disheveled face, tried to resist the urge to look down there, tried to pretend that it wasn't something his rotten head was assuming.

But the faint blotch of blood on your unclothed inner thigh said it all.

What had he done?

Jungkook felt nauseous, not the kind one feels during sickness but the kind when one feels like dying.

He had drowned. Sunken himself willingly. He was already engulfed in guilt and it would never leave him.

You would never forgive him.

Jungkook flinched hearing the wails of little Iseul. Her nighttime fuss. He quickly reached to cradle her in his jittery arms, swaying her a bit. Iseul was bawling uncontrollably, asking for her mother, as if she knew something bad had happened to her mother.

Jungkook robotically walked towards the table and sat down with Iseual. His back to your lying body. Didn't let the child look your way. He wouldn't be able to contain more guilt. If there was even a tinge of sweetness in Jungkook’s rotten heart, it went for his daughter. He didn't want her to witness the remains of his recklessness. Not even in her babyhood.

Because she would also hate him.

Jungkook wiped the thick tears on her cheeks while his own slid down. The blood. It wasn't just blood, it was the life you both had created and he had destroyed just moments ago. He had overdone it all. In the daze of anger and alcohol. He had fucked up.

Jungkook pathetically reached to open the lids covering food dumbly trying to find something for Iseul to eat. More tears shed down as he found himself looking at the cake. It was your birthday.

And he had given you his gift.

His rotten gift.

Which you’ll always remember in your darkest miseries.

And he will too.

He killed his own unborn child, didn't he?

A/N: Oh my fish! I can't believe I wrote something so dark and rotten on the second day of new year. My brain poops bad sometimes.

Well…it's very very unhealthy angst, I do know. I hope you like this deranged piece of my work. Let me know what you guys feel about it. (🫣)

Please do Like, Comment and Reblog.

[waynewifey]

aporia — b.w

part one : dear mr. wayne

part two: aftermath

part three: aporia

epilogue

sumary: aporia suggests “an impasse”, a knot or an inherent contradiction found in any text, an insuperable deadlock, or “double bind” of incompatible or contradictory meanings which are “undecidable”. [reference]

pairing: battinson/bruce wayne x reader

genre: drama & romance

warnings: mental health struggle, miscarriage, car crash, a lot of internal dialogue

word count: 2k

A/N: the more i write, the more i put myself in this story. i feel like this ‘you’ is so complex i can’t help but try to explain her further. part four will be bruce’s perspective on all of this + an epilogue. i’m so grateful for the amazing feedback given on the last two parts and for the new followers, thank you so so much. i hope you enjoy this. (also this gif??? HELLO???)

GOTHAM. USA.

— bargaining.

the uncomfortable silence makes you want to scream. she told you that was a normal reaction and they couldn't get rid of those moments, they were essential for your self reflection. the problem was being alone with your thoughts, even for just one minute. they keep deciding you won't recover any time soon. everyone keeps holding you like a cracked vase. even negligence was better than being put under the microscope.

"i don't know what you want me to say" you respond, your gaze anxiously shuffling between the objects in the room. the woman's eyes, however, don't ever leave your face. she holds that journal like a scientist analysing a mutation. like you're some weird thing.

"you should say whatever you feel like saying." that's what she always answers. dr. quinn was extremely stoic, even for a therapist. you still liked her, though, because her pragmatic approach helped you shift your point of view and see yourself from an outside perspective, which made you want to help yourself. after weeks of feeling extra irritable, still trying to forgive your husband for lying to you, you realised maybe everything was too much for you to handle by yourself. you wanted to go back to the real world but before that, you had to do this. a quick chat with your psychiatrist and he gave you the contact to harley quinn.

"i think i've been way too mean to bruce" your confession has her nodding, like that observation had been made sessions before and she was waiting for you to realise that. "he's been so supportive and helpful, but sometimes words just fly out of my mouth and i don't even mean them"

"do you think it's easier to blame him than to come to terms with what actually happened?" you can't answer, because this was all you've asked yourself lately. you were a coward, hiding behind his suffering to prevent confronting yours. it's easy to curse him, to reject him, but it's not what you want to do. lately it feels like you don't have any control over your emotions and actions. you thought maybe if you pushed away the last person that still cared for you, you could disappear in your loneliness and finally stop hurting. "y/n you've been through something terrible. the kind of thing we never think it's gonna happen to us. i know it doesn't feel real, but you have to face it that it is. the thing about trauma... you have to keep living with it. you have to keep going, because it doesn't go away. but this is your life and you don't get to stay on standby. you hurt the people you love because it's better than hurting yourself. you told me you feel bad about it, so why won't you change?"

why won't you? you don't even know where to start. it felt comfortable living in sorrow forever. horrible, but comfortable. again, it was in fact easier to blame him than to accept this was reality. but he's right outside, been waiting for you for two hours, as he has done twice a week for over a month. you weren't being fair to him. he didn't deserve this. dr. quinn sees the defeat in your eyes and sighs in a mission accomplished type of breath.

"think about this, okay? we'll talk on friday." you nod, as if you weren't already overthinking it.

bruce sees you before listening to you. he's created the habit to stay in the waiting room with headphones in, blasting loud music. he didn't want you to feel like he was prying on you. he also didn't want to listen anything you had to say about him. you had the right to be mad at him, given everything that had happened. he knew you didn't mean it when you bomb dropped the word 'divorce' every now and then. it would take you some time to get back to normal and he wouldn't rush you.

you walk to the car quietly and get into the driver's seat. he agreed to let you drive to and from therapy. the office was actually in dr. quinn's house, a little bit on the country side of the city, if you could call it that. it was a 50 minute drive with no traffic, roads empty enough for you to drift off in you thoughts. he watches you drive, eyes brightening up a little more everyday. he realised that trying to shield you from the world wasn't going to work out. you need to learn how to be on your own. he needs to learn how to care for you while away.

"i'm sorry," you caught him off guard, observing the curves of your face. he frowns at the unexplained sentence. you glance at him but look back at the road. "for the way i've been acting. for pushing you away. for being too complicated. i know you're trying to help… thank you for staying."

"darling, of course. for better or for worse, remember? i'm never leaving you. we're getting through this, together. and don't you worry about me, i'll be okay when you are too, alright? you're doing great, i can see how much you're working towards it." he holds out a hand for you and you take it, intertwining your fingers. his calloused palms are softer now, courtesy of the months without batman-ing. they still embrace yours entirely and warm the cold tips of your fingers.

"i love you" the sweetness of that feeling dominates your tastebuds and it's almost like the day you started dating. that innocent type of love that consist of the pure enjoyment of each others company. however, your attempt to savour the moment is ruined by a shape in your peripheral eyesight.

"i love you too" bruce's voice is muffled by the anxious thoughts taking over your mind. the panic starts to overflow. he notices your body getting stiff and the wheel looking loose on your hand. your breathing lost it's rhythm to creaking gasps. there's something wrong. your eyes are frozen in a vehicle. he's seen this van before. maybe not this one, but an identical one, in a security camera tape in court. it looks exactly like the one that took you. "baby, hey, hey. i'm right here." you don't pay any mind to the man beside you. you can't, not when your instincts are telling you to run. not when you can feel the gun getting knocked on your head over and over again. bruce is saying something. the tears are blurring your sight. this is too much.

he's calling you screaming at this point, tears are rolling down your cheeks and you still haven't looked away from the van. there's a bump coming up, the car is dangerously fast and you're not driving at all. he goes for the wheel but isn't quick enough. the tires wiggle, going in their own direction. the car changes lanes, getting in the wrong way of the street. another car is coming and the impact isn't light. your head is thrown forwards, the airbag covering your face. the windshield shatters and little pieces of glass get stuck in your hair. the crash isn't too bad, you're both still awake and only the front has been smashed. but you get out hyperventilating, falling onto the ground and weeping.

bruce gets out as well, only a scratch on the forehead. he has to kneel on the dirt to hold you up. for a while, he doesn't say anything. the other driver is standing, phone in the ear. he's also fine. the cars were the only damage. two other drivers stop by, offering help. you wish he could help you, but it seems as if there's something inherently wrong with you.

— depression.

the weeks following the accident were harsh. it took a while to get you believing in recovery again. you still weren't sure. somehow there was press at the site, so pictures of you crying next to a car crash made it to the papers. there's minor commentary online about you faking it for your husbands popularity. most of the netizens feel desperately sorry for you and have painted you to be their new princess diana, the comparison seems wild to you.

you only go online every three days or so, because you can't resist the urge to know what bruce hasn't been telling you. jokes on you, he's actually been a lot more transparent lately. you agreed that the batman would show up to the sentence of edward nashton, to pressure the jury with his presence. it worked and the criminal got life without parole. the lawyers said that your public presence impacted on his trial, as 20 years was the standard. you were just glad he wouldn't do that to anybody else ever again. the case got national and your family from outside the state, that you not-so-kindly kept in the dark, started making contact, victimising you all over again.

but things were getting better, gradually. it had been almost a year and it felt like that chapter of your life was finally being finished. you were trying to get your life back, including your driver's license. it was suspended for a while after the accident, so now you had to submit a bunch of medical records to prove that you were mentally fine to drive again. that's how you found yourself in bruce's home office, searching everywhere for your documents. you could've asked him where he put it, but he had just fallen asleep in the living room and you didn't want to disturb him.

in one of the desk's drawers, you find a folder with the local hospital logo on it. you open it, shuffling through the papers you've seen before. only one stands out, with "ob/gyn" on the top of the sheet. you wonder if there's anything helpful there. your eyes start reading the words one by one, listing the examinations they've done on you. the subject changes abruptly.

the ultrasound analysis reports the miscarriage of an unknown pregnancy to the patient's spouse.

you feel like you're about to throw up. the world starts spinning as you force yourself to continue to read.

the fetus was estimated to be in the development stage of the beginning of the second trimester. the miscarriage was most likely a result of several mechanical trauma. dilation and curettage was performed with the patient in a medically induced coma.

you try to remember to breathe in and breathe out just like dr. quinn taught you. you expect the tears but they don't come out. the panic doesn't come. it's suddenly so quiet. it's not like a hole has been punched through your chest, it's like you have no chest at all. it's like you don't even exist. you somehow sit down, your body does. you feel as if it's moving on it's own and you're just watching from afar. your thoughts sound so distant, so irrelevant. you can only think of the baby that had once been inside of you and you didn't even realised. you didn't have the time to love him. you've had him there, right there, the thing you wanted the most in the world and he was taken from you. everything was taken from you.

if a tree falls on a forest, and there's no one around to hear, does it still make a sound? it felt like your fall was silent.

[wangxianficfinder]

Fic Finder

Apr 2nd

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1. hi there, can yall help me find a modern au fic where wwx was kicked out of the jiang household and he started to spend his nights within his school premesis? i remember lqr, lxc and nmj being the ones to find him one night. thank you for yalls hard work 💐

FOUND? Where is home? by SpicyRamen_10969 (M, 80k, WIP, WangXian, Modern AU, High School, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Coming Out, Not Jiang Family Friendly, Supportive LQR, Good Sibling LXC, Fluff, Angst with a Happy Ending, JC Being an Asshole, Possible Smut?)

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2. Do you know fiction where wei ying travelled back to past but lan zhan feeling also travel back.

FOUND? 💖 Come Back to Me by s6115 (M, 9k, wangxian, time travel, fix-it, soulmates)

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3. Nsfw ask but this fic was one where wwx and lwj helps jc and lxc (jc was the one asking) how to have fun/ painless sex. They try multiple times but end up getting cockblocked or something of that sort @thatperson0-0

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4. Hi! I'm looking for a fic where during the Lotus Pier seige there is an array or something set up that protects it and results in a baby for WWX and LWJ that is about the same age as A-Yuan - they already know (can't remember how). As a result of that array, the baby, A-Yuan, and people involved can shift into animals. Thank you! @hpikachu2003

FOUND! 💖 Magical Marriage Ribbons Series by starandrea (Varies, 1m, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Accidental Marriage, Fluff, Happy Ending, Telepathic bond, Kink Negotiation, Family Drama, Magical Pregnancy, Dual Cultivation, Shapeshifters, Modern with Magic, Immortality, Yilling Wei Sect) has LWJ continuously struggling to vocalize nearly ANY of his sexual wants even well after wangxian get together

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5. looking for a fic that I thought I'd saved and hope i didn't dream it up... in this fic, I think wwx and lwj aren't tgt, but slept tgt? wwx finds out he is expecting, and instead of letting lwj know, he goes to the wens for refuge (I believe granny wen is mentioned in the description!) I don't know much else, other than it might be a modern au fic. thank you!

FOUND? Nothing but your heart by airinshaw (E, 21k, WangXian, Modern AU, A/B/O Dynamics, Implied Mpreg, First Time, Getting Together, Angst and Drama, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anal Sex, Whump, Breeding Kink)

FOUND? The Winner Takes It All by YilingSani (M, 46k, WangXian, Modern AU, Single Parent WWX, Old Friends, One Night Stands, No Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, PTSD, Panic Attacks, Forgiveness, Second Chances, Inspired by Mamma Mia! (Movies) Teen Pregnancy, Mpreg, mention of miscarriage, Birth Trauma, amniotic fluid embolism) although Granny Wen isn't in the list of characters but she features in the story?

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6. Hi i am searching for a particular fic but it seems to have disappeared on me so the storyline was that LWJ and WWX were married but WWX wasn't happy in the marriage and LWJ comes to know this by hearing it from some where that WWX said so when he had gone to a flower house/brothel and then LWJ calls upon WQ to confirm if what he heard was true which she does and so he makes a decision to go leave planning to head to Yilling or CR and when he was travelling he encounters XXC and SL but doesn't reveal his identity of being WWX's husband just says that he is a disciple of the Lan and the 3 of them work on this night hunt where out of 3 wishes one would be fulfilled, is a curse related to i think some sisters also JWY was the emperor and WWX's post was either a general crown prince or a marquis and after WWX comes to know about LWJ leaving asks LWJ's maids who go with LWJ whenever he visits CR if they know where has he gone— with him also going to CR in search for LWJ (unsure) and JWY in a scene tells WWX some thing along the lines of that it wasn't probably also LWJ's choice, was being pressured into the marriage or so. most likely was muti-chaptered don't remember much of it and was on ao3. Thank you. @1p1rose1

FOUND! 💖 Eat, Pray, Night Hunt by Itszero (G, 29k, wangxian, Arranged Marriage, Reconciliation, Getting Together, YLLZ WWX, Misunderstandings, Royalty, Historical Inaccuracy, Happy Ending, Fluff, Imperial AU, palace au, Dual POV, Fluff and Angst, Historical Fantasy, Xianxia but also court drama ya know?)

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7. Hi! I'm looking for a CQL!verse fic in which people can choose to tie a red string between them when they get married (sort of a soulmate au, but not really). When wei wuxian falls off the cliff to his death, lwj ties a string between them. when wwx comes back, the string is how lwj recognizes him. when the canon plot is over, lwj thinks he has to cut the string between them. i think this fic might have been deleted, though, but any help you can give would be welcome. thanks

FOUND! 💖 a trail of blood to find your way back home by blackelement7 (T, 19k, wangxian, JC & WWX, what if a soulmate string au, but without the soulmates aspect of it, a reflection on the nature of marriage, WWX is full of regrets, so is LWJ, Mutual Pining, Miscommunication, JC & WWX Reconciliation, JC is trying his best but words are hard and his brother is stupid, Siblings, Canonical Character Death, but it's just WWX, accidental 3zun feels, WWX as the most unreliable of narrators)

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8. hi! thx so much for your work in the fandom. i'm looking for a fic where wwx is a sect leader and towards the end of the fic (I think) he's at a cultivation conference where someone tries to set fire to his rooms and he and lwj go into a qiankun box. i think at the very end wwx summons a phoenix born from the flames of his burned rooms. thx so much!

FOUND? A Phoenix Rising - An Untamed Story by AitchNKay (E, 130k, WangXian, The Untamed (TV) Ending, Angst, Porn With Plot, Anal Sex, jerking off, Top/Bottom Versatile | Switch WangXian, junior ducklings, Oral Sex, Post canon, Not everyone is gay, Family is everything, so many feelings, Introduction of New Characters, porn with feeling, Friendship, Healing, Suibian/Bichen/Chenqing/WangJi, 3 weddings and a funeral)

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9. hello, thanks for your work!

i was trying to search for this fic where wwx from post-canon travels back in time and is in around the yllz time, he keeps doting on lwj and yllz (past wwx) gets a bit jealous but doesn't know what to name it. he refuses to believe that he married lwj in the future and the future wwx gets mad at him and tells him not to hurt lwj. can't seem to find it anywhere.

FOUND? From the Future for the Past by friedchickenlord (G, 27k, wangxian, time travel, fluff, humor, love confessions, pining, happy ending, denial)

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10. Hi buddy, I have one request. If you have came across a wangxian fic where Wei Wuxian is reincarnated and came to Gusu with Lan Wanji ( I think LWJ is the chief cultivator here) and realised that LWJ was getting marriage proposals from around the (cultivation) World a lot. And he propose to conduct a competition to find the most suitable candidate from the available lot while being secretly heartbroken that he could not have LWJ. I'm not sure if it's ABO or not. A-yuan also has an important role in this fic. Plz help..... @grrumpywoof

FOUND? a morbid longing by sunandseas (E, 24k, WIP, WangXian, Mutual Pining Misunderstandings, Porn with Feelings, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Omega LWJ, Alpha WWX, Bottom LWJ, Possessive WWX, BAMF WWX, Protective WWX, Hurt LWJ, Dark WWX)

is that the one where the suitors have to steal a token from lwj, and lwj gives it to wwx, but wwx thinks it was just the gusu jade access pass and was really sad about someone winning the token?? 🤔 (based on the comic about the witch's cat?)

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11. Hii, I'm looking for a fic. It was about wwx wished that he does not exist in the life of people he love, because of what happens with jiang yanli, jin ling, jiang cheng and everyone he loves. So he live, but not with his parents, jc,lwj and so on. And there's one time his parents come to an inn and met wwx, they dont know who wwx is because they never have a kid. But wwx and his father, has a similar face, so when he look at wwx, he feel like wwx is his kid that he never have.. I hope that u know this fic is, because I have been trying to remember where and what fic it is but I cant. Thankyou for your hard work.

Pretty sure #11 is a twitter thread by cerbykerby but I don't have a twitter account any more and thus searching is hard

FOUND? For 11, this is the cerbykerby fic unrolled

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12. heyy admins! i'm looking for a fic where wei ying's parents turns out to be alive. from what i remember they somehow escaped the burial mounds after many years and they learned about wei ying from people then they made their way to the cloud recesses and they stayed there a bit. thanks in advance! <3

FOUND? The Long Winding Road Home by Admiranda (T, 13k, CSSR/WCZ, wangxian, flash forwards, Time Travel, Post canon, WWX's parents come to post canon mdzs, not for JC fans, fluffy family reunions, mocking LQR to his face, mocking JC to his face, wild rumors abound)

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13. Hello, I was wondering if you could help me find a fic. It was a pacific rim and atla fusion au where I think wwx was transferred to the station lwj was at. Then they were attacked and wangxian were either forced or called to go into a Jaeger together to attack the kaiju. @xo-minx

FOUND? The Weight of the World by KouriArashi (T, 67k, WangXian, XiYao, Pacific Rim Fusion, Robots, Monsters, robots fighting monsters, Family, Romance, Developing Relationship, Angst, (but not about the romances), Hurt/Comfort, Politics, Happy Ending)

FOUND? Thunder's Coming Over Me by phnelt (E, 38k, WIP, WangXian, Avatar & Benders Setting, Pacific Rim Fusion, temporary character death (wwx's), Angst with a Happy Ending, Action & Romance)

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14. Hello ! First of all, THANK YOU for your hard work on this blog and WangxianFicRecs, I really enjoy my time on both ! :) This is a first for me so I hope I'm asking properly (otherwise, please, excuse me^^'). I'm looking for a fic I think was on a list in FicRecs last month but I can't seem to find it back... I just skimmed through it at the time and thought that it was great and that I would come back to it later... except I forgot to bookmark it and had not luck searching my AO3 history so far :'(. It was a Wangxian AO3 fic and the only thing I remember clearly is a sentence where Wei Ying thinks about the way Lan Zhan smells and says that he decides LZ's scent smells like love.

Aaaaand I'm sorry because I know this isn't much, but if by any chance someone happened to know which fic it is and I could stop racking my brain, I would be super grateful for that ! :)

I wish you all a wonderful day/night !

I was #14 in the April 2nd FicFinder. I finally went through all of February posts and found again the fic I was looking for! It was in fact in your Crossdressing comp and it wasn't about LZ smelling like love but LZ's kiss tasting like love 😅.

Anyway, here's the fic : only the dead (have seen the end of war) by comforting_monachopsis.

Sorry to have bothered you and thanks again ! ❤️

FOUND? only the dead (have seen the end of war) by comforting_monachopsis (T, 42k, wangxian, JYL/JZX, temporary amnesia, BAMF WWX, sad LWJ, grief/mourning, loneliness, mild gore, secret identity, loss of identity, identity porn, angst, humor, crossdressing)

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15. Hi!! For next ficfinder, can you help me find this two fic?

A) a fic where Qin su is the one that resurrected Wei Wuxian and she give him a detail instruction. I remember a scene where Wei Wuxian try to seduce Jin Guangyao so that he can get out from Koi tower. If I'm not mistaken, Qin su and Lan Xichen is best friend and Xichen really sad and disappointed at himself for not realising his best friend is long dead. There are also part where wwx try to sunburn Qin su face so it become unrecognisable.

B) a fic where Lan Qiren is mistakenly drink wine in his teapot and he is doting to Wei Wuxian and told about marriage arrangement that has been sign by Cangse Sanren and Lan Wangji when they are a little kid.

Thank you and Have a nice day😘 @chibiizzy

15A)

FOUND! The Tales of Despereaux (CH 1-23) by stiltonbasket (T, 50k, wangxian, LXC/NMJ, JC & WWX, JYL/JZX, JC/WQ, Canon DivergenceAdditional Warnings In Author's Note, major ships are listed but others might pop up!)

15B)

FOUND! 🔒 Who gave Lan-xiansheng alcohol?! by HeloSoph (Not Rated, 14k, wangxian, LQR & WWX, CSSR & LQR, CSSR/WCZ, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Canon Divergence, POV LQR, Drunk LQR, WWX is Loved, Jiāng Family Bashing, YZY Bashing, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, Engaged WangXian, Gūsū Lán Forehead Ribbon, Cloud Recesses Shenanigans, Character Death, Self-Indulgent, Wedding Planning, Fluff and Humor, Married WangXian, Good Uncle LQR, CSSR & LQR Friendship)

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16. Hi I really need help but there’s this wangxian fic where basically lan zhan keeps complimenting Wei wuxian and wwx tells him he has to give him notice before doing it so lan zhan gives him a time frame or writes him a letter etc. and i cannot for the life of me find it please help me find it 😭😭😭 @vilethot

FOUND! Content Warning: Romance by Ariaste (M, 5k, WangXian, BDSM, Praise Kink, nonsexual kink, which turns into sexual kink, wwx's canonical fetishes, Kink Negotiation, basically my ongoing mission to demonstrate to fandom that Kink Can Be Unbearably Soft Actually)

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17. Hi! How are y'all doing? for the next fic finder, I'm looking for a modern au, no magic, where fem!wwx goes to live with lwj after she turns 18 and her main goal is to get together with lwj so she's very shameless to the point that lwj has to tell her that he'll have to set rules if she continues like that, and asks if she's aware that he's a man

anyone knows it? I'm scared that it was deleted. Thanks! I hope y'all have a wonderful day!

FOUND! tell me what's your motive by sweetlolixo (E, 7k, wangxian, F/M, Modern, Genderbending, Female WWX, Male LWJ, Penis In Vagina Sex, Dirty Talk, Oral Sex, Breeding Kink, Masturbation, Size Difference, Stomach Bulge, JYL and LWJ best friends agenda, Older LWJ)

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18. Fic Finder: I'm looking for a fic where LWJ is cursed to his young child self. In Yiling, WWX sees a Lan boy with the forehead ribbon surrounded by people, and then he recognizes child LWJ. Child LWJ refuses to leave the nearby inn because he's waiting for his uncle and brother, who do not come. WWX waits with him and says he was a student of LQR, but LWJ doesn't believe him because his uncle did not teach when LWJ was young. Eventually WWX convinces LWJ to go to the burial mounds with him, and he writes a letter to LXC but he isn't sure if LWJ will recognize his brother as an adult.

Thanks in advance!

FOUND? I think this fic is the deleted "Staying close to you" by Venon. I couldn't find it on the wayback machine but I have a copy.

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19. Hi! I forgot to bookmark this time travel fic and the only thing i can remember is he came back during lan qiren’s class and he cried and suddenly fainted?? thank you!! @gideonmorningstar

FOUND? Wish Me Luck by Starlight1395 (Not Rated, 164k, WangXian, Fix It, Time Travel, Angst, PTSD, Hurt/Comfort, Flashbacks, Nightmares, Slight fluff, Implied Sexual Content, Lots of tears, cannon levels of blood/violence, Minor Character Death, secondary character death, Sibling Bonding, semi mild smut, mild Self-harm)

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20. hello!! i’m looking for a thread fic on twitter. lwj is feral alpha who’s been checked into a rehabilitation centre. i don’t remember exactly but there was yiling in the name. wwx is his assigned omega social worker who is the only one who can calm him down and the only one lwj listens to. i can’t remember all the details but I remember wwx giving lwj a rabbit and donkey soft toy. wwx would also play chess with him occasionally. lwj’s episode was triggered by his uncle’s discussion of getting him a mate. eventually lwj gets loose, wwx gets pregnant and gets in trouble for it even though there was some foul play. wen ning is also an alpha at the centre and wen qing visits him occasionally. thank you so much 💖 i never got to finish it and i really want to know how it ended!!

FOUND! come closer (i might not bite) by celerydragon (E, 4k, wangxian, WIP, A/B/O, Medical AU, Feral Behavior, Drama, Pregnancy, Unplanned Pregnancy, Mpreg) is being posted to ao3 now / this the original twitter thread for the rest of the story. unfortunately the thread is broken in a few parts so i’m glad the writer is starting to move it to ao3

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[livi-in-digital-circus]

Here are some songs that I think would match Ragatha/Miss Agatha and Jax/Jackson in your AU!!!

Ragatha/Miss Agatha:

- the grudge by Olivia Rodrigo would work with her and her terrible fiancé, especially after what he did to her baby. I think it could also work with her and Jax after she slapped him.

- Diet Mountain Dew by Lana Del Rey would work both Ragatha and Jax. It fits their will-they-won’t-they narrative.

- Bigger Than The Whole Sky by Taylor Swift. This song reminds me a lot of Agatha’s miscarriage and the horrible feelings that came with it. It’s the moment where everything in her world fell apart.

- Lose You To Love Me and Single Soon by Selena Gomez. The first one would work with Ragatha’s regrets over her past relationship with her ex, while the second one highlights a happier ending for her. It’s her new start with Jax, specifically her getting ready for the dance with him!

Jax/Jackson:

- Dancing With Our Hands Tied by Taylor Swift. I feel like this matches the dance scene, before everything fell apart of course.

- teenage dream by Olivia Rodrigo. This song would probably reflect the aftermath of Agatha’s coma and all the pain Jackson went through after finding out. Although this isn’t canon to the story, I feel like this would fit his 18th birthday party without her.

- Love You Down by Ready For The World. This song would resonate a lot with Jackson’s one-sided crush on his brother’s teacher and the dreams he had about her.

- Colors by Halsey would definitely work with Jax’s dreams about his past. It summarizes all the people and all the feelings he ignores to avoid feeling anything.

Anyways, I hope you enjoy these choices :D. Your AU has been one of my favorite TADC AUs I ever read. The amount of emotion, drama, and romance was captured perfectly without feeling OOC. Keep up the great work Livi!

AAAAAA THANK YOU SO SO MUCH 💕

I don't know why I didn't think of adding more Taylor and Olivia songs to my playlist, but I actually had those two Selena songs somewhere in the back of my head while making it!

I'll listen to all the songs when I get home from school in 10+ hours (it's past 1 AM here lol)

I would also like to take this opportunity to explain some of the Korean songs on the playlist:

Prologue by aespa is about feeling immature and not ready for adulthood, to me it fits Agatha perfectly because even though she has been an adult for some time, she still has the heart of a teenager and has trouble dealing with some adult issues

Checkmate by Xdinary Heroes is about feeling confident because of a won game, I relate this song to the moment when Jax's attack on Ragatha during their stage play was successful

The Ugly Duckling by YENA, well I interpreted the song's lyrics much differently than it should be interpreted, I relate it to Agatha's miscarriage due to the lyrics being about trying to move on after a horrible event and there is also a child mentioned so-

War of Hormone by BTS is a very controversial song which that has been accused of considering girls playthings for boys, basically Jax's attitude towards Ragatha before she almost abstracted

Doll by (G)I-DLE, the title says it all, it perfectly describes how Ragatha was treated by Jax and how she's fed up with it

Quarter Life by TOMORROW X TOGETHER is another song about finding adult life kind of hard and trying to go on despite you already screwed up a lot of things, every time I hear this song I think of Jax and how he feels after remembering his former life

Lonely Boy by TOMORROW X TOGETHER is a breakup song that in my opinion fits how Jackson felt after losing Agatha

Happily Ever After by TOMORROW X TOGETHER (yeah, it's my fav boysband lol) is the song I had in mind while writing the last chapter, even though it's upbeat it tells about how cruel life is and that there's actually no happy end, just like in the story :D

And thank you for enjoying my AU! At first I thought it would fail as it has no drawings (I'm really terrible at drawing + I can't do digital art) and focuses more on writing, but the amount of support and love my work has received in these few months makes me incredibly happy 🥺

[discluded]

Build Jakapan, Daemi's Poi, and other individuals stepping forward

I like my peace, but this situation is very serious and deserves to be documented clearly for the international/English-speaking fanbase, which was my original goal of archivism on Tumblr. Some of the posts have already been deleted and others will be washed away with the sands of Twitter time.

Please do not talk about this in terms of "drama" or "tea" because that does a disservice to the victims and people here on Tumblr who may have lived through these experiences watching you treat their trauma like nonsense.

I have no stake in this and do not claim to know the full truth. However, rather than seeing everyone vague about what's happening, I want to provide an account of what people on Twitter are seeing above the noise. I will try to keep this post updated with important developments when appropriate.

My only ask is please don't comment to my inbox about this post. I understand your anger and hurt, but I need to take care of my own well-being. Make a dummy account if you want to talk about it; I will not censor the comments section of post as long as you are reasonable and not victim-blaming.

Finally, please be kind to each other, including Pond (as long as he is doing the right thing) and [Jan 23 update: lmfao fuck Pond] the other actors in BOC given that Poi specifically said she hid this from the cast, and also especially fans who loved Build and were blindsided. There is no "deserved" to be upset, people who invest their love and free time into something are allowed to be hurt... the only thing that matters about a person's integrity is how they choose to act with this information.

tw: domestic violence, intimate partner violence, abuse, threats, photos of bruises, rape, miscarriage

On approximately Jan 19 2022, right after the BOC line-up announcement), Daemi announced they would be breaking up as a writing duo, which prompted fans to speculate about the future of Kinnporsche season 2. Daemi as a writing duo is made up of two members: Yok and Poi.

In the next day or so, Poi insinuated that Build had stolen the idea for 4 Minutes from her and given it to Sammon, who then helped cut her [Poi] out of involvement in the new series. Build responded to this by publicly crying and issuing a statement, going above BOC's management. Pond was with Mile in Pairis at the time/flying home and responded to Instagram comments that they would investigate fully before issuing a statement.

Approximately the next day, on Jan 22 2022 local time, Poi came out with a statement and chat logs with proof that she used to be in a relationship with Build, and he had cheated on her, financially manipulated her, physically abused her, and threatened to kill her.

The original translator is a ManUtd fan and had no involvement in the fandom but took the time to do the translation since it was blowing up on Thai twitter and known fandom translators were not doing them. They then deleted those tweets after being harassed by Build's fans, but has continued to tweet about the situation.

(please click on the image for the full translation of the chat, I stacked them to save space)

Here is an additional Thai summary of Poi's claims and an english translation of that.

Some people noted that in the original IGS where Poi references this abuse on approximately Jan 19, she used stock images from Pinterest. Those claims included that she had a miscarriage due to the fact he had hit her so hard. Poi again confirmed that she had a miscarriage and noted she had hospital documents to back up her claim. She also addressed the comment that she used stock images due to the fact that Instagram is a visual social media.

Poi also confirmed that the legal process was already started. Given her history with the BOC cast, she might have also felt the need to get the story out of accusations of her lying and starting "drama" about the situation by posting her chat logs and photos.

Subsequently, Build shared messages that Poi had sent him regarding a situation with a sponsor in an attempt to make her look like a "crazy" woman, but incriminated himself and deactivated on Jan 22 2022 (possibly temporarily).

During this time, additional people came forward about being a victim of Build. One Thai fan came forward about knowing another of Build's former girlfriends, who was the victim of gang rape. However, the OP is getting permission from this individual to tell the story first and so the story may not be released to the public. Update Feb 10: Most likely false. (leaving text here for honesty that this rumor existed and debunked)

Another one of Build's ex-girlfriends, who was previously silenced and shamed by his fans, confirmed again that she was physically assaulted by Build 8 years ago.

I will not add the tweets with evidence of Build cheating on Poi/involvement with other women while supposedly dating one of them as while cheating on a partner is bad, it is a personal indiscretion and not a crime unlike the situations highlighted above.

As for the fact that both authors in Daemi sexually harassed other actors in KPTS, I am not excusing those actions. People, notably WOMEN, should not have to be perfect victims to be believed. You don't have to like Poi or approve of her past actions to think she does not deserve to be abused.

Additionally, if you believe that Poi's past actions are indicative of her character, I want to clarify why people were upset with him in summer 2022 since that was not documented on Tumblr either. Having bad opinions online is not a crime, but they do show a pattern of behavior from him from attitudes to actions. Build's comments/attitudes from that situation are consistent with his abuser behavior that is documented above. (1) (2) (3) (4)

Any additional documentation from past victims will be a link to the reblog since I will run out of image space on Tumblr. I will not document things like BOC suspending Build for the time being since those are widely seen and have an English translation.

Final update update as of Feb 10, 2023: Updated on the false allegations about rape and this being debunked since it's important. Please do not ask me for updates about him; I don't care about him, he makes me miserable, people whose careers I do care about don't have to deal with him anymore. Please do not make me responsible for your mental health.

Jan 28, 2023: Build has left BOC. At this point, there's nothing else I can provide as context in English that will change people's minds so let's respect that this will be processed in a court like it should have been in the first place. Take care of yourselves friends.

Final notes: Genuinely fuck Pond.

Jan 25 2023: link to the latest post with evidence from Poi and Mynk

Jan 23 2023: Kind anonymous provided IDs which have been added. Clarified position on Pond, with link to latest comment. I have more posts with translations from Thai twitter and will update another day.

Please take care of yourselves and your mental health. 🙏

[dollanganger-in-the-attic]

Ok so about Cathy’s bloody accident in Petals - I’m 99% sure it was a miscarriage. I’ve missed my period for 3 months in a row a few times and when I finally got it, it was just a regular period if a little heavy. I’ve also never heard of a D and C being used for anything but an abortion

First off i want to preface that a lot of people have interpreted that scene as a miscarriage and i think thats totally fine either way. Art is meant to be up to interpretation!

However, i am of the opinion that she did not have a miscarriage so thats why i’ll be sharing points to support my view.

First: Cathy asks Paul straight out if she had a miscarriage and he tells her no. He kind of even seems shocked that she was think that would be kept from her. I think the scene where he assures her that she did NOT have one is meant to clarify the ambiguity to the reader, so thats how i have interpreted it.

Secondly: A D&C can and is done for reasons other than miscarriage/ abortion. Im not a doctor but i did work in hospitals, and i did chart for a patient who had a d&c for something unrelated to a miscarriage. Cathy wasn’t only having period problems, she was malnourished, poisoned, and traumatized so she would probably need more intervention than the average person. Plus its a fictional story and you know VCA likes to ramp up the drama ;P

Third: I’ve read several versions of the Petals on the Wind manuscripts and each time the “accident” is present it is always clarified later on that she never had a pregnancy from her time in the attic- so i dont think it was ever intended for her to have had a miscarriage.

If anyone has any counter arguments or opinions lmk! Lets discuss, it seems to be one of the more interesting mysteries of the story

[tovesaiko]

Sometimes I think about what the real Jiang Li's life would look like of she went to live with the Ye family as a child and it makes me sad.

Despite her father claiming she wasn't ruthless enough Ji Shuran didn't have to accuse A'Li of pushing her and causing her miscarriage. She could've just let her go to Luoyang and be raised by the Yes. She would be out of the picture and she could easily manipulate her husband to completely ignore his daughter even without labelling her as a criminal. Out of mind out of sight.

And A'Li? She'd grow up with her good-hearted second uncle, smartass cousing, drama queen of an aunt and loyal third uncle who doted on her mother so I'm pretty sure he'd dote equally on his niece. What a life that would be! And, with Luoyang being so close to Huaixiang she might have still met and befriended Xue Fangfei, especially since we know the Ye family had a shop in Huaixiang before magistrate Xue was accused of corruption and the town was mismanaged by Feng Yutan. They would most likely have some dealings with the magistrate.

Anyway dreaming of a happier AU where both women are safe and sound 🥺 (Fangfei doesn't marry Yurong in this one somehow. Maybe Jiang Li convinces her not to don't look into this one too closely 😂)

[anhed-nia]

BLOGTOBER 10/2/2024: THE STRANGER WITHIN (1974)

I wish I had made this the first movie of the season, because it was an ABC Movie of the Week from October 1, 1974! I really enjoyed this weird thriller about how Barbara Eden gets pregnant despite her husband George Grizzard's vasectomy, and her increasingly bizarre behavior suggests that something more than infidelity is afoot. Screenwriter Richard Matheson adapted his own 1953 novelette Trespass, and I have learned that a novelette is longer than a short story and shorter than a novella. I did not know this.

Roe v. Wade was codified the year before THE STRANGER WITHIN came out, and the film is full of casual but surprisingly frank remarks why a person might need an abortion. Barbara Eden had a traumatic miscarriage not long ago, which motivated George Grizzard's vasectomy, and his suspicions about her mysterious new pregnancy are threatening the integrity of the marriage, and then she starts getting sort of sick or something--so it's clear that a person might be reasonably entitled to end a pregnancy based on various quality of life issues for the child and the mother. I wonder if it was a big deal for Barbara Eden to choose to do this movie where she and her costar regularly and openly discuss abortion with no moral quibbling. I wonder also if it was a big deal for ABC to show it, at the dawn of legal abortion.

Anyway, soon the couple has bigger problems than family planning, because Barbara Eden becomes hypersensitive to sound, and she needs the house to be ice cold, and she makes weird paintings, and she eats pounds and pounds of salt with scalding black coffee, and she craves information which she absorbs through her hands, rubbing and touching and feeling everything in the library. The couple gets Bob the hypnotist (David Doyle) involved, and it seems like hypnotism is a really great job if you are a gigantic busybody who immediately asks and won't stop asking probing personal questions, even if people beg you to stop. Anyway, Bob has one of the best lines of dialog I've heard all year: "Why do people always assume that anything from outer space is horrible?"

THE STRANGER WITHIN is not a perfect film; it's an obvious ROSEMARY'S BABY knockoff with a little EXORCIST sprinkled in, and for a movie that is only 75 minutes long it has a few too many long scenes of Barbara Eden wandering aimlessly in nature as she communes with whatever knocked her up. But it's intriguing and entertaining, and it seems like everyone enjoyed making it, especially cinematographer Michael D. Margulies whose pedigree includes John Cassavetes' MINNIE AND MOSKOWITZ, POLICE ACADEMY, DIRTY MARY CRAZY LARRY, and of course, THE BABY. Night scenes are illuminated by dramatic pools of light and splashes of saturated color, which heightens the drama even of exposition and repetitive bickering; it's just a fun movie overall. Recommended for viewers who assume that anything from outer space is horrible.

[madwolfxiii]

Season 3 of Bridgerton. Holy shit. I loved it. As a fan of not just the show, but also the books, I am excited with some of the changes they are throwing in. But everyone on the Bridgerton fb group I am in are not. Should I be shocked since it's people on fb??? But I just had to share my little rant review that I posted in the group for all of the people being salty. Spoilers below!

What can I say about those final 4 seasons of Bridgerton except WOW. And it's a good wow. I was upset that it was split up but the season was still amazing. Romancing Mr. Bridgerton has been my favorite of the books (so far). And I feel like they really did it justice. They had the main story beats while still doing something different.

Moving onto the Francesca stuff. You know what. I am actually excited about the change to Michaela. At first when people were spoiling it I was just like, why do they have to do that? I feel like genderbending an established character is just lazy. But I can forgive it because I think it would definitely make their story interesting! Now I could be saying this because I haven't finished her book. I started it before watching season 3 and just got to where John died and Francesca had her miscarriage. So I am not so invested in her and Michael as people who have read the book and may consider it their favorite. But I can see why people would be bummed with a major change to their favorite couple.

But I HIGHLY disagree with everyone saying that the show will be unwatchable now. It's still the same story. Just Michael is Michaela and that will just present more obstacles for them. I do realize a big part of Francesca's storyline is her infertility and wanting children. That really doesn't need to change just because she falls in love with a woman. She can still have that struggle. They can show it during her marriage with John before he dies. Maybe they really struggle to get pregnant then they do and he dies and she loses the baby. Michaela can help her through that and they fall in love and maybe adopt!

But before I hear the "well their relationship can't be public because it wasn't allowed back then." Are you really looking for historical accuracy with Bridgerton? Mixed couples were DEFINITELY not allowed back then but the Queen is poc. Bridgerton is presented as like an alternate timeline to history. The real Queen Charlotte was not of color. None of the couples in the books are mixed. But Shona created this world where it is accepted in earlier times then real life. Not without scrutiny and struggle, obviously, as we see in Queen Charlotte when skin color is commented on throughout the season. But some people are okay with that inaccuracy but put their foot down with a main couple being a gay one? On the topic of them being accepted and being able to be public, well that may be part of the storyline and maybe the Queen helps them out. In the novelization of Queen Charlotte, her and George knew about Brimsley and Reynolds and they were okay with it. I'm sure the Queen would have found a way to let them be together if the story wanted to go that direction. Sadly we never found out what happened to Reynolds.

Also people are saying that Michael is supposed to be one of the hottest love interests and their book is the steamiest. Uh it still can be. Michaela looks pretty hot to me and I am as straight as they come. If seeing two girls be intimate on screen makes you uncomfortable then that's your problem. I am ready to see Franny get down and dirty with her lady love.

Also I totally saw Benedict as bi since season 1. He always came off as a little bi curious and I was so happy that he finally accepted it. Good for him for having a threesome. The only complaint I had about that particular storyline was how we would be watching some Whistledown drama then it would suddenly cut to the threesome. It was sort of jarring, as hot as the threesome was. But I thought it was cool seeing Benedict explore his sexuality because like I said, in actual history that was not allowed. But Bridgerton isn't following actual history to a T. It's paving its own way and I am fine with that. With the mention of the masquerade ball next season, Benedict will FINALLY get his love story. Maybe Sophie would be down for a threesome. Who knows.

Also to all the people STILL saying Polin was unconvincing...you need your vision checked because their love and their happy ending had me in tears. I was really happy with how well it did follow the book while also changing it up enough to make it interesting. Because if I want the beat by beat story of the book, I will just read that again. That's the thing people. WE STILL HAVE THE BOOKS. They are not going anywhere. This show will not "ruin" them.

[fistfuloflightning]

you’re so right about Nienor and Mablung, and your art of them is so sweet ❤️ can I hear your thoughts on them?

Thank youuuu @serregon!!! 🥰 And ohhh I have lots of thoughts about these two!!! Be prepared for brainmush and me jumping around from headcanon to AU synopsis under the cut lol

Her years in Doriath are their cutesy era, before they’re both scarred from Turin’s jackassery. Mablung fell first, he admired her strength and resilience and her blunt way of talking which was so unlike most of the Doriathrim he knew. Nienor wasn’t far behind, since this kind buff marchwarden took her under his wing and encouraged her to talk freely with him, so unlike all the Doriathrim she knew. It was nice to have a confidant to share her problems and worries with and who would in return be able to share stories about her father and brother, neither of whom she had ever met.

Still unsure if I headcanon Morwen secretly teaching Nienor how to read and write while in Dor-Lomin, or to have Mablung be the one to teach her in Doriath. (and then she has to relearn it all over again in Brethil :P ) Either way, Mablung was her teacher during her years there, and was the one who taught her how to fight and how to move like an elf (which she used to great effect when she snuck along with Morwen’s bodyguards and even the elves didn’t notice her). His epithet is the Heavy Hand, which I take as he was skilled at fisticuffs/heavier weaponry (aka me indulging in my headcanon of Nienor preferring hand axes to fight since her teacher favored brute force and she’s referred to as the ‘likeness of Hurin in woman form’ and I’m think tall buff axe-wielding woman lol).

In Doriath as part of her training, they would play tag in the forests, or their version of Marco Polo which was each of them imitating bird calls and trying to discern what was the fake bird and trying to find ‘it’. (And if kisses were used as forfeits, no one would ever know 👀. Morwen certainly wouldn’t, Nienor would make sure of that.)

Mablung and Nienor probably got near the point of considering marriage (there’d been more than a few close calls), but then Nargothrond happened, and then Glaurung… And if the next man Niniel fell in love with looked so much like an elf, she would never understand why that pained her every time her husband kissed her and it would feel wrong.

I have two different timelines going in my head, one is where Mablung safely got her across the Girdle into Doriath before they got ambushed. Melian managed to undo most of Glaurung’s enchantment (since I’m absolutely sure a Maia’s power could undo that of a created monster with nowhere the strength of one gifted with the ability to manipulate the First Music). Nienor gets her mind back, but Morwen is lost. She convinces Mablung to help her look for her family, and loyal and utterly devoted elf that he is, he does so. They hit the road and spend the next three years wandering Beleriand (and getting married along the way). They never find Turin, but they do find Morwen and they all move somewhere south, along the coast—but definitely away from all the trauma drama of the rest of Beleriand.

The other timeline: the exhausted remnants of the Nargothrond expedition are ambushed and Nienor flees into the darkness. Three years later, Mablung rides into Amon Obel as in canon, just in time to hear about the dragon’s death and that of Turin’s and Nienor’s. Frantic, he searches the river for her body. But to his shocked relief, he finds her alive. Heavily injured and suffering from a miscarriage, but his Nienor is alive. With her memory restored, she gladly goes with him even though she now feels tainted from her marriage to her brother. The only place she’ll be safe, Mablung reasons, is within the Girdle. But instead of returning to Menegroth, they settle in the Forest of Nivrim. Mablung just…never returns to duty. He lost Nienor once, nearly twice, and his devotion her comes before his duty to his king. And Thingol did give him permission to search for the children of Hurin—he just didn’t give a return date.

It takes Nienor time to heal from everything she’d gone through in the past couple years, but Mablung is literally made of time and he’s with her every step of the way, her hand seeking his like it did in the darkness of Glaurung’s spell. And without the sword of the dragon’s curse hanging over their heads and the world in a small moment of peace, they can finally act on the long-awaited promise they’d made to each other back in Doriath.

And when Thingol is slain several years later after screwing over the Dwarven craftsmen, Mablung is not there to die before the treasury. He has better things to do. Namely, his wife.

[prbni]

Queen of Tears: Random Rant

Idk how this rant will go but I'd just say they underutilized the chemistry and potential of Kim Soo Hyun and Kim Jiwon.

Starting

The show started with the banger. The comedic elements shrouding the angsty moments between a wife who loves her husband but can't express it properly and a husband who's just tired of everything and just wants to ends things with the wife without being crushed by her and his in laws.

Too many subplots

While I had my favorite supporting characters,too many subplots, villain plots and backstories kinda ruined what could have been an estranged but still in love couple rekindling the flame through communication. We saw a hint when Hong Hae In first time admitted to Hyun Woo that she was scared because of her tumor,prompting Hyunwoo to comfort her. This should have been the core plot, the journey where Hae In opens up bit by bit & Hyunwoo realizes he still wants to be the one who wants to be by Hae In's side. Yes, all of that happened but happened so fast because in the foreground something else was always going on.

Glimpses of Romance

So, you cast actors like Soo Hyun and Ji Won & then give them only one significant kissing scene in the drama while most other kissing scenes were just flashbacks from their dating era and honeymoon... Make it make sense. The drunk kiss of Hae In to Hyunwoo gave me goosebumps but doesn't count as a full fledged kissing scene.

The Yongduri bedroom scenes were good & the one where they spend time together in Hyunwoo's studio apartment was good as well. But we're talking about a married couple here. Villains got more screen time than they did.

Untapped Issues and Random Sequence of Crucial Scenes

The miscarriage of their baby 1031 & their polar opposite reactions to it caused their marriage to almost fall apart, yet this was never properly addressed. It should have taken a fold by fold in a sequence realization for Hyunwoo to how Hae In had pure adulterated love for him, how she was suffering beneath her tough exterior, how he doesn't actually want to let go of her to give their relationship another chance. But it took some stand alone, sequentially jumbled up scenes with Hae In learning Hyunwoo wanted to divorce her, losing her memories of it, Hyunwoo crying from guilt seeing her suffer. ALSO WHY CAN'T YOU GIVE MARRIED COUPLES PROPER HEART TO HEART TALK SCENES?! Hae In collapses, wakes up in the hospital and apologizes to Hyunwoo for making him suffer. Case Closed.

Why couldn't they talk about which word or what actions caused them to drift apart? Just Hyunwoo randomly mentioning one day that he used to cry alone that's why he started sleeping apart-like yeah the elements of reconciliation were put in, but they were so haphazardly put in, I kept losing track on how and why they reconciled.

Grand Ending

I feel like the beginning sequences & the ending sequence was written by one person, & the chaos in the middle was written by someone else. Ending was emotional but poetically beautiful. Loved how they tied the cinematography together. Alls well that ends well I guess.

[lifewithchronicpain]

I have been watching the Curious Case of Natalia Grace, mainly for the second season where Natalia actually gets to speak for herself. It is so beyond upsetting, do not watch unless you're ready to rage.

There is a Lot to the story but I will sum it up as best I can. Natalia is a Ukrainian orphan with dwarfism, specifically Spondyloepiphyseal dysplasia congenita. Because of her disability she would need many surgeries for her feet, and money concerns related to this is considered one potential cause for what was to happen. After being passed around, a family called the Barnett's adopted her.

According them, Natalia was really an adult that was secretly trying to kill them. If it sounds familiar it's because it's the plot of the movie Orphan. This poor girl wound up with an incredibly abusive family that eventually decided they didn't want her but because the mother was so concerned with her image, she couldn't be seen as getting rid of a disabled child. So she tried to pass Natalia off as an adult pretending to be kid, and after lies and faked drama the Barnett's actually got Natalia legally re-aged to 22.

Natalia was actually about 8 years old. Dental records, DNA tests, doctor's records, her own biological mother, who gave her up because she couldn't care for a disabled child, all say she was born in 2003 and was a child at the time of these events.

So Natalia was put in an apt at age 8, and Mrs Barnett forced her to tell people she was 22. Ableism and ignorance of little people plays a huge part here, otherwise no one would have believed her age was 22 nor would it have been legally changed. Even though neighbors thought she was young, they went with the lie and proceeded to view entirely childish behavior as weird and annoying. Because she lacked the fucking boundaries and sense of stranger danger of a typical 8 year old!!!!! They also said she said a lot of sexually stuff, and I don't know why I should need to explain to you what 8 year olds do when they hear things!!! An 8 year old with no adult, looking to anyone for company and just help. It's beyond upsetting to think of what it must have been like for her during this time.

Natalia was evicted after a year and moved to another apartment. Not too long after being there she met a family that recognized she was a fucking child, took her in, and called the goddamn cops. First people in Natalia's poor life to do something for her. She is still with them to this day, with what looks like a beautiful loving family.

The Barnett's were charged, the husband was ables to get acquitted in part because the judge decided her Legal age would stand, and he could only be accused of abandoning a disabled person and not a minor. Meanwhile no one could let the jury know she was really a minor when this happened. Huge miscarriage of justice and the wife was never taken to trial.

It's a hard documentary to watch, especially when you get a lot of the Barnett's story first without much dissecting of the facts. But then you do get Natalia's side, and the Barnett's lies are laid to waste. One of them being that Natalia had pubic hair and a period. She never did, the wife made her say it to the husband. I mean, there's a lot of fucked up shit that happened to Natalia that I have not mentioned. I'm also not getting into the drama within the Barnett family except to say the husband tried to blame it all on the wife, claims he was abuse and avoids accountability, and is the most pathetic excuse for a human being, honestly. The wife is no better, she's just a monster.

The thing that pisses me off so much though are the attorneys, especially this one guy that Knows Natalia was a child and acts like she has to take accountability for being a troubled child. Of course he offers up all excuses for his client.

And that's the rub, Natalia had her childhood robbed from her, then and now. She's not ever granted the view of her behavior as mitigated by being a child. They even showed one of her neighbors refuses to accept she was 8 and not 22, and she knows for sure because she was hussy and just knows how to put on an act. It just amazes me how quick we are to jump to the most negative explanation for something and ignore any evidence to the contrary.

I'm just glad Natalia was able to have a voice in this drama, and that she finally has the family she had always wanted.

[wangxianficfinder]

Fic Finder

~*~

1. Excuse me, but could anyone tell which Wangxian fic has Wei Wuxian as someone who works as a cursebreaker in a modern setting and meets Lan Wangji when his laptop got cursed? I really want to reread it again, please? @kaitou-cure-prism12

FOUND! Crossed Wires by stardust_and_sunlight (T, 20k, wangxian, modern cultivation, college/university au, meet-cute)

~*~

2. I'm hoping you can help me re-find a fic I read a while back. It was a WIP at the time, a modern AU, and it started with JZX calling in a favor from LWJ to help him find a good present for JZX's fiance's brother (WWX). LWJ researches WWX online and gets intrigued and also recommends that JZX give WWX a dizi. Thanks! @marbleglove

FOUND! The Trials of Purchasing Gifts for a Gremlin by MavisMelisande (T, 3k, XuanLi, WangXian, Modern AU, LWJ Has Friends, Social Media, Christmas Presents, POV LWJ, POV JZX)

~*~

3. hello, thank you for all your hard work! I was on twitter following this thread a few months ago then forgot and now twitter is glitchy but i rmb the author said she will poster on ao3! She has a small following then and it’s so hard to find it on ao3 might be incomplete I’m not sure but I really want to know how it ends cause it’s k wording me

- it’s about lan zhan writting to himself from a different universe? wei Ying dies or something in another universe and Lan zhan is trying it to prevent again

- high school setting

- no it’s not the space one!!

thanks in advance guys, you all the backbone of the fandom 💛 @meedorin

FOUND? 至少还有你 | in another life by nagiusagi (T, 16k, wangxian, modern, high school au, LWJ pov, heavy angst w happy ending, hurt/comfort, pain, hurt WWX, student WWX, student LWJ, letters from past, implied/referenced child abuse, character death (JYL), grief, misunderstandings, teenage wangxian, WWX’s hair ribbon, forehead ribbon exhange, pianist LWJ, parallel universes)

~*~

4. Hey I am looking for two fics !

I have searched many tags but i cannot find them

A) this is set in post canon where lwj and wwx visit a village for nighthunt I think but they find lwj's mother's family ? It was a oneshot ig

B) This is a modern au fic again a oneshot ig? The only thing i remember is that lwj was a fashion icon here and very sassy . Oblivious Wwx as usual ! i think wwx implied lwj like mianmian and later lwj talks to his brother and says " brother do i not look gay enough?" .I do not remember anything else . Also it had good friendship dynamics with almost everyone.No angst but again i can be remembering wrong . Also !!!!! Lwj wore heels ( it wasn't a genderbend fic )

4A)

FOUND? Gentian Seeds by yuyu_finale (T, 9k, WangXian, Thirteen Years of WWX’s Death, at first, Post-Canon, later on, Mentioned Madam Lán, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Found Family, but literally, some elements of character study, Soft WangXian) LWJ discovers his mother's hometown

FOUND? The Same Cloth by x_los (T, 8k, WangXian, Established Relationship, Case Fic, Aftermath of a Case, Family Feels, Family Drama, Family Bonding, Family Secrets, Clothing Porn, Worldbuilding, Government, Chief Cultivator LWJ, Married Life, Character Study, Post-Canon)

4B)

FOUND? Turn the Other Cheek by Minyoongiisacatuwu (E, 19k, WangXian, Unreliable Narrator, Modern, Oblivious WWX, Panties, LWJ flirting very hard, Rabbits, Rimming, Mutual Pining, LWJ is a top in a Thong, LWJ in heels, Fashionista LWJ, Friends to Lovers, Aftercare, Porn with Feelings, College/University)

~*~

5. Hello, I'm looking for a fic where WWX thinks he has a miscarriage in the burial mounds and then ends up giving birth at the end of the war.

FOUND? Impermanence, Transience, Permanence by Best Bepsy (BepsyGray) (E, 39k, wangxian, canon divergence, unplanned pregnancy, mpreg, gore, sunshot campaign, assumed miscarriage, medical procedures, childbirth, golden core reveal)

~*~

6. Hi! I'm looking for a fic where wwx is a single parent to lwj's child. They knew each other in school and were friends, but wwx disappeared after yzy kicked him out. Wwx has been sending letters to lwj to tell him about their child but lwj never saw any of the letters. The meet again after some years and lwj gets to know his child and it turns out that it was lxc who intercepted all the mail and destroyed it before it could get to lwj. I think lxc was angry that wwx was stringing along his brother and disappeared without a word, but didn't realize that wwx had snuck into the house to see lwj one last time. Thanks!

FOUND? Nothing but your heart by airinshaw (E, 21k, WangXian, Modern AU, A/B/O Dynamics, Implied Mpreg, First Time, Getting Together, Angst and Drama, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anal Sex, Whump, Breeding Kink)

~*~

7. I was wondering if you can help me find a fic. It was so long ago I'm ngl. I remember it was stormy and the cultivators had to seek shelter or they saved someone. In return that someone a 'fortune teller' could show the future. I remember I think Qiren was wary. She showed the future to the previous generation like cangse sanren and lan qiren. I think she also showed the future to Wei wuxian generation. It might have been in Portuguese or spanish maybe. It could have been in english. @whitewoodwalker

~*~

8. Hi, I'm looking for a certain fic where Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli send Wei Wuxian to Gusu after the end of the Sunshot Campaign because they're worried about him. WWX really doesn't want to go and I think they end up drugging him?? He is in a really bad headspace for part of the fic. @noxgold​

SIMILAR Swordless by WithBroomBefore (G, 32k, WangXian, Established Relationship, Canon Divergence, WWX goes to Gusu, Golden Core Reveal, Trans Character, AFAB LWJ, philos) and "Rescue" by the same author also has some similaritis

FOUND? but I think you're looking for if i had the strength by agloeian (M, 16k, wangxian, post-sunshot, hurt/comfort, getting together, fix-it, tgcf style gods, mental health issues, recovery, accidental baby acquisation)

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9. Hi could you pls help me find a fanfic I read about wangxian in which Wei Ying was stoic and lan Wangji was shameless I thing Wei Ying grew up in Gusu in that fanfic it was basically a personality switch au

I this one was a deleted fic but I can't remember the name rn 😓

FOUND? Uno Reverse by A_flower_in_the_snow (M, 62k, wangxian, lan WWX, OOC, role reversal, not JC friendly, not Jiang friendly, time travel fix-it, WIP) Deleted but can still be found in wayback machine. The author goes by xinXiniieboo currently afaik.

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10. Plz help me i'm looking for a fanfiction And all I remember is a time travel on another fanfiction named the rise of the divine oracle 😭😭it was like after they dead they were sent to the past to try and change there future with madam yu being to be nice to see ying

well rise of divine oracle was by Blak_Salt and is on ffnet and ao3 but is post canon not time travel (tho an excellent fic). I wonder, is ur time travel fic the one where post canon everyone dies so wwx tries to send himself back in time but it messes up and goes too far - prior gusu lectures, and it makes him sickly and he doesn't actually consciously remember the future. Instead events trigger memories from the future that he (& everyone else) thinks r visions. Madam yu becomes nice.

This probably fits here too:

whateverweilanlovechild: #12 haha i believe you are looking for the fic I wrote. I'm sorry to inform that it's discontinued and only 2 chapters are there as of now

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11. Hello mods!! I've been looking for a very specific fic for a while now but I can't find it with the usual tags. It's wangxian, post canon and mpreg, where LSZ, studying the gold cores, tries to help WWX form a new one by dual cultivatition (with LWJ) but instead accidentally gets him pregnant. I hope you can help me and thanks in advance! @jenaerith

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12. Plz help me 🆘  im looking for a time travel fanfiction was about the wy an lz who time traveled to the past from the original fanfiction named "the rise of the divine Oracle” @bunnychwan​

whateverweilanlovechild: #12 haha i believe you are looking for the fic I wrote. I'm sorry to inform that it's discontinued and only 2 chapters are there as of now

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13. Hello, (this is not a WangXian fic but a Xichen fic) I Think it was set in modern world. It was some kind of party and the OC's was an adopted foreigner who is a designer for clothes. Xichen then invited her to like some kind of stargazing that night that's all I remember about the first chapters but like in the middle of the plot(?) He found out that OC needed him that's why she accepted his proposal

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Hi, I just want to find a fic it's about a Xichen x OC set in Modern world (I think) Oc was an adopted rich heiress or something but she is a designer(?) They met a party and Xichen asked if they could go on stargazing(?) Then Fast forward to the middle of the story, Xichen and Oc are in a relationship then Xichen found out that OC needed him to marry her inorder for her to adopt the kid she was set to adopting.

FOUND? His Mistress, His Wife by PhoenixLumen (E, 26k, LXC/OFC, wangxian, check all the tags from the work before reading, smut, porn w feelings, porn w plot, modern, attempt at humor, BDSM, bondage, bottom LXC, submissive LXC, brotherly bonding, businessmen, safe sane and consensual, implied/referenced child abuse & neglect, multiple pov, strong female character, marriage proposal)

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14. This is a bit of an obscure one but I'm trying to find a fic: I don't remember if it was time travel or something else but something happened that led to Lan Zhan having to immobilize Wei Ying like Wen Qing did to him after Qiongqi Path, despite Wei Ying telling him he wouldn't survive it if it happened to him (again?) and then when they meet again they have to deal with the fact that Lan Zhan did it anyway. I can't remember the context so hopefully someone recognizes it anyway @vulpestars

FOUND? If You Forget Me by DivideTheSorrow (Not Rated, 189k, WangXian, JYL/JZX, YZY/JFM, WIP, Time Travel, Fix-It of Sorts, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Build, Relationship(s), Canon Divergence, Eventual Happy Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, POV Alternating, Original Character(s), Angst)

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15. Hello, I'm looking for a fic if you have the time.

It's during the yiling patriarch era, not sure if it was during the war, it feels like it but the burial mounds and the wens are involved so I'm not sure. Wwx basically gets an Infection and is forced to amputate his leg. The wens do the amputating in (not sure) the burial mounds. Another Wen creates a wooden prosthetic leg for him.

Later, I think it was on the battlefield which is why the exact timelime is confusing me, wwx gets shot with an arrow in his prosthetic. Jin zixuan is there, gets worried and wwx is forced to reveal that he lost a leg. Or it could've been just a foot idk.

Thank you and goodbye.

FOUND? we’re starting at the end by Miss_Enthusiasimal (M, 92k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Time Travel, Canon Divergence, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Golden Core Reveal, Burial Mounds, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Starvation, emaciation, Cannibalism, Self-Harm, Amputation, Suicidal Thoughts, Sunshot Campaign, let JZX and WWX be friends club)  

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16. Hi, mods! Pls, Im looking for a fic (Modern AU) in which WWX (still alive) left LWJ (for now reason) & he goes mad, desperatedly looking for him in different men who look like WWX, but ends up killing 'em all during sex (it's BDSM, kinda gore, dark/obsessive LZ), until he meets real WY in a pub w/o knowing it's him (he introduces himself as Moxuanyu, but doesnt have Mo's appearance) & both end up together, sharing the same kink. LXichen, WQin & WN show up briefly, only 'cleaning' LWJ mess. TYSM @einherjermineord

FOUND? Dead Ringer by Regency_Bunny (E, 7k, WangXian, Modern AU, Dark LWJ, Dark WWX, Dark WangXian, Dark LXC, Murder, Sadism, Masochism, no kink shaming in this household (this is not your average healthy bdsm this is actual murder), Identity Porn, Doppelganger, Obsession, somnambulism, Minor Character Death, Mention of torture, Choking, Lan typical unhealthy relationships, identity theft, reference to suicide, Drunk LWJ, Date Rape Drug/Roofies, Knifeplay, LWJ Swears, Happy ending (for some), Mildly Dubious Consent, Mention of illegal domestic imprisonment (not WangXian), Future murder husbands in the making) i just finished reading it and the description is on point <3

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17. Hello!! I was looking for a certain fic where Wei Ying turns into a child by accident and the juniors take care of him.I can't find it anywhere :( I hope you could help me with it!! But if you couldn't find it then a fic with similiar content can help too 😚 @for13years-i-play-inquiry-foryou

FOUND? most likely grow by cafecliche (T, 14k, WangXian, Age Regression/De-Aging, Character Study, Post-Canon) Easily the most famous of the fics with that description.

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18. Hii <3 I'm looking for this fic where wrh kidnaps wwx and is all nice to him because wwx is some kind of phoenix and well he shows wwx that the Jiangs are being killed and well wwx goes crazy and actually turns into a phoenix and the ans take wwx and imprison him because they know he is dangerous as the phoenix is wwx but not quite. @thatperson0-0

FOUND? Breathing Firestorm by ladyshadowdrake (M, 110k, wangxian, angst, fluff, captivity, creepy WRH, no non-con, dreamsharing, politics, people making the best decisions they can, epic length, mythical creature WWX, canon-typical violence, dark, happy ending)

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19. Hii I'm looking for this fic where wei ying and lan zhan form some kind of bond that makes them read each other's minds and feel how the other feels and in the end they try to sacrifice themselves to some kind of fight but instead they end up forming the same bond with meng yao, nie huaisang, jiang cheng and wen ning

FOUND? We Can See a New Start by  preciousbunnynoiz (M, 127k, wangxian, time travel, fix-it, soulmates, angst w/ happy ending, PTSD, hurt/comfort, communication, check all the tags) 

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20. For FF, I can't recall if it was time travel or not, but the scene I recall: CR arc, WWX refusing to copy his punishment texts in the library. He confessed to LWJ that he wasn't planning to complete the copying because the punishment was unfair. He said something like: it takes more than 1 to cheat (I think it was the cheating bit) but I'm the only one being punished. And that opened LWJ's eyes for the punching JZX scene. Can't remember where it went after but I really want to read LWJ's realization again. @mreisse

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