#like they kiss and then the whole letter thing happens and suddenly Kitty is over Yuri like that?

[allthingsfangirl101]

My Sister’s Fake Boyfriend–Peter Kavinsky

Dedicated to @hopeisoverrated​ for sending in the request!

What's worse than watching your sister date a cute guy? How about the fact that the guy she is dating just happens to be the only boy you've ever fallen for. Oh, and it's all fake.

When Lara Jean told me that she was dating Peter Kavinsky to fool everybody, I have never felt sicker. At that moment, I didn't recognize my sister.

                           ~•~

"What do you mean you don't really have feelings for Peter?"

"It's not that hard to understand, Y/N. Josh came around the corner with my letter in hand. I panicked and kissed Peter to avoid talking to Josh. Then, Peter and I got to talking. I want to keep Josh off my back and he wants to keep Gen off his. So, we came up with a plan, one that helped both of us."

"Don't you feel weird about fake dating someone?" I stuttered, nervously tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.

"Not really," she shrugged not looking up from her phone. I just hummed as I stood up and started walking out of her room. "Y/N," she stopped me. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," I stuttered. I quickly left her room before she could see the tears building up in my eyes.

                           ~•~

To give her the benefit of the doubt, Lara Jean didn't know about my crush on Peter. No one did. I suffered in silence.

I waited by the front door for Lara Jean to come down so we could head to school. When she was finally ready, we started to leave.

"Wait," I said, stopping her. "You didn't grab your keys."

"Because I'm not driving." She said, opening the door.

"You really have to get passed this whole too-scare-to-drive-thing. It's sad," I sighed as I followed her.

I froze on the front porch when I saw Peter getting out of his Jeep.

"You guys coming?"

I looked over at Lara Jean to see her shrugging. "What? He offered to take us to school. It's part of the whole couple thing."

She started walking towards Peter, but I didn't move. "Y/N," she sighed when she noticed I wasn't following her. "Come on."

"Actually," I stuttered. "I'll just ride my bike to school."

"What are you talking about?" Peter laughed. "Y/N, the school is like 15 miles from here. Just hop in."

I hesitated, really not wanting to be stuck in a car with my sister and my crush. I sighed, knowing I didn't have much of a choice.

The whole ride to school, I sat in the back and didn't tare my eyes away from the window. I took a sip of my Korean yogurt but froze when I saw Peter watching me in the rearview mirror.

"What?" I asked softly.

"What are you drinking?" He asked.

Lara Jean looked over her shoulder at me and sighed. "It's a Korean yogurt drink Y/N is obsessed with. She drinks one every morning instead of eating breakfast," she said before I could.

"Can I try it?" Peter's question caught me off-guard. I didn't realize I hadn't answered until Lara Jean sighed, turning back towards me.

"Y/N, just give him some," she whispered. I cleared my throat as I handed it to him.

I held my breath, laughing slightly when he looked surprised. "Wow," he chuckled. "That's really good."

My breath got caught in my throat when he turned around to face me as he pulled up to a stoplight.

"What will it take for you to bring me one of these tomorrow?" He asked.

"Tomorrow?" I stuttered.

"Yeah," he shrugged. "Didn't Lara Jean tell you? I'm gonna start taking you guys to school from now on."

I really needed to find a different ride to school.

                       * * * * *

It's been three weeks since Lara Jean and Peter started dating. Fake dating.

Since they started, they hang out a lot more. Which means, I hang out with them. For some reason, they don't like being alone so I'm always their buffer.

It was miserable.

Not because I was their third wheel, but because Peter made me feel like I wasn't. He constantly talked to me, laughed at my stories, and actually paid attention to me. Which was strange since I was usually known as the quieter Covey daughter.

Margot was the smart one, Lara Jean was the creative one and Kitty was the energetic one. I have always been the shy one.

The more time I've spent with Peter, the more I've started to fall for him. And I hated it. It got to the point where my heart ached just looking at him.

I walked in the door after a long dance rehearsal. I readjusted my dance bag over my shoulder as I headed into the kitchen, desperately needing to fill my empty water bottle.

"Hey, you."

I jumped at the sudden male voice. I turned around to see Peter smirking at me.

"Peter," I gasped out. "You. . . You scared me."

"Sorry," he laughed slightly. We stared at each other, not saying anything. I cleared my throat and opened the fridge. I winced when I tried to pick up our Brita filter.

"You okay?"

I gasped as Peter walked up behind me, slowly closing the fridge and turning me around.

"I'm fine," I said under my breath as I walked by him.

"Y/N," he stopped me. "What's wrong? Are you hurt?"

I blushed at the worry in his eyes. "It's nothing. . . I just. . . I had to get a new partner because Jeremy moved and my new one can't quite do the lift yet. He sort of. . . dropped me and I landed on my shoulder."

"Wait, he dropped you?" Peter said, stepping closer to me. "Who is he?"

"Landon," I said softly.

"Landon Oaks?" He asked through his gritted teeth. I nodded, slightly biting my lip.

"Hey, Y/N? How was dance?" Lara Jean walked in and grabbed a snack from the cupboard.

Before I could say anything, Peter spoke up. "Her dipshit partner dropped her and she landed on her shoulder."

She looked up at me with wide eyes. "Please tell me it wasn't your bad shoulder," she said nervously.

"Bad shoulder?" Peter asked, looking between the two of us.

"Y/N dislocated her shoulder at a competition last year. She didn't say anything and kept dancing. Dad realized it after during the award ceremony when she wouldn't move her arm. We rushed her to the hospital. She ended up needing surgery."

She walked over and started looking at my shoulder. "Where does it hurt?" She asked quickly. "There is a big bruise. We should tell dad and maybe. . ."

"I'm fine," I cut her off. "It's not. . . It doesn't even hurt that bad."

"Are you sure?" Peter asked gently. I looked between my sister and her fake boyfriend.

"I'm fine," I said as I started to head upstairs. I turned around in the doorway and added, "Please don't tell dad."

"Fine," Lara Jean sighed. "Just make sure you ice it now and put a heating pad on it when you go to sleep."

I nodded, trying to ignore the look on Peter's face.

                       * * * * *

I was sitting alone at lunch when I suddenly noticed a shadow. I looked up to see Peter smiling at me, sitting across from me.

"What are you. . ." I stuttered.

"Lara Jean had to meet with her teacher. Something about her English paper," he shrugged. I nodded, remembering her mentioning she needed extra help on her paper.

I went back to watching the video on my phone, sighing when I instantly saw what my coach was talking about. I was stiff.

"What are you watching?" Peter asked, taking a bite of his apple.

"Oh," I cleared my throat. "One of our numbers for competition has a duet between Landon and I. The one where. . . The one where he dropped me. Anyway, my coach filmed Landon and me yesterday so we could watch it and see what we were doing wrong."

I gasped, biting my lip as Peter took my phone out of my hand. I held my breath as he watched the video, a smile never leaving his lips.

"I forgot how beautiful of a dancer you are," he mumbled. I looked away, trying to hide my blush. I nervously tucked a piece of hair behind my ear.

"Him? Not so much," he added, chuckling softly.

"It's not his fault," I sighed, taking my phone back. "We weren't always partners. But my last one moved and his last partner quit. We kind of just got thrown together. We're still getting used to dancing with each other."

"Anything I can do to help?"

I looked up, my eyes wide. "No," I stuttered.

"You sure? I could help you get passed the awkwardness."

"How?" I asked, both wanting and not wanting to take him up on his offer.

"Well, maybe dancing with me will help you feel more confident about the routine. Then you can go and dance with him, feeling fine."

"I don't know, Peter," I stuttered. "It's not that I'm not comfortable with the routine, I just. . . I'm not used to dancing with anyone other than Jeremy."

"Exactly," Peter said, sounding a little excited. "You can practice getting used to dancing with someone else by dancing with me. I don't mind."

I opened and closed my mouth, not seeing a way out of this. "It's settled then," Peter nodded when I didn't say no. "I'll come by after school and you can teach me your routine."

                       * * * * *

At first, dancing with Peter was a disaster. I kept stumbling and couldn't teach him correctly. Finally, he pulled away and laughed.

"Y/N, breathe." He chuckled, rubbing my arms. "It's just me. Besides, this is what you're good at. Own it."

After that, I was able to somewhat calm down and teach him the routine. We ran it one more time, perfectly. As the song ended, Peter held me in our final position while we caught our breaths.

My eyes widened when I realized how close we were. Peter briefly looked down at my lips before looking back up at my eyes.

We jumped apart when we heard applauding. We let go of each other and turned around to see my dad and sisters watching us.

"That looked great, kiddo." My dad smiled as he walked over and gave me a high five. I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear, looking at Lara Jean.

"Since you were able to do it with Mr. Two Left Feet, you shouldn't have a problem doing it with Landon now." She smiled at me, causing me to nod.

"Wanna run it one more time?" Peter offered.

"No," I said a little too quickly. I opened and closed my mouth as they all stared at me. "I think. . . I'm gonna go ice my shoulder."

Without another word, I quickly walked inside.

"What was that about?" I heard Lara Jean wonder aloud.

"I don't know," Peter sighed.

                       * * * * *

After Peter's and my dancing, I've ignored him. I started getting a ride with our neighbor. I've been eating lunch in the library to avoid sitting across from him and my sister. I was the one who said Landon and I should get some extra rehearsal after practice every day. And when I did finally come home, I went straight to my room before Peter could stop me as he studied with Lara Jean at the kitchen table.

I walked in the door after the longest dress rehearsal of my life. The competition was this weekend and my coach was working our asses off. I walked into the bathroom, sighing as I took the tight updo out of my hair. I ran my fingers through my hair, my scalp instantly ached as my hair fell around my shoulders.

"Okay, what's going on with you?"

I jumped when Lara Jean appeared in the doorway. "What do you mean?" I stuttered.

She looked at me, seeing right through my question. "Come on, Y/N. You've been acting really weird lately. And it's not your normal pre-competition nerves. You've been avoiding me for weeks now. Did I do something?"

"No," I answered quickly. "You didn't do anything. I'm just. . . The competition is tomorrow. You know how I get. Plus with the whole "Jeremy leaving and Landon and I not clicking" thing. . . I've been stressed."

"And the whole "you and Peter" thing," she added.

"What?" I stuttered.

"Really, Y/N?" She sighed. "You're my sister. I'd have to be the worse sister in the world not to notice how jumpy and stuttery you get around him."

"It's nothing," I said quickly as I tried to leave the bathroom. She stepped in front of me, blocking me.

"Y/N, do you like Peter?"

"I said it's nothing," I said angrily as I brushed past her. Before she could say anything, I walked into my room and slammed the door shut.

                       * * * * *

I didn't go down when dad said dinner was ready. I stayed in my room instead. Usually this would concern a father, but my dad knew how focused I got the night before a competition. I usually spent the whole night in my room, getting ready for it. Packing my bag, setting up all my make up, steaming my costume and getting to bed early.

Lara Jean, on the other hand, knew I wasn't shut out in my room because of my competition.

I could faintly hear my dad downstairs doing the dishes as Kitty talked about school. Suddenly, the doorbell rang.

"Is that Peter?" My dad asked.

"Yeah," Lara Jean said, her voice sounding weird even from up in my room.

I held my breath as I heard the door open and Peter exchange pleasantries with my dad. I turned up my playlist of the songs my team and I were dancing to at the competition tomorrow, as I heard Peter and Lara Jean walking upstairs.

A few hours later, I took the risk of heading downstairs to the kitchen. I knew that Kitty would be taking her bath and dad would be in his room, binge-watching some medical show.

With my headphones in and my competition playlist playing, I snuck downstairs. I quietly and slowly started warming up the soup that my family had had for dinner.

As I waited for my food to warm up, I started doing my choreography around the kitchen, unaware that I was being watched. I was in the middle of the song where Landon and I break off and dance our duet. I closed my eyes and started doing the routine that Landon and I do, the one I taught Peter.

I turned around, gasping when someone stepped into my arms. I opened my eyes, instantly stepping back when I saw Peter smiling at me. I pulled my headphones out, taking another step back.

"Peter," I stuttered. "What are you. . . I thought you were with. . ."

"I was," he said as he reached up and scratched the back of his neck. I watched his nervous gesture as the microwave beeped.

"Lara Jean and I have been talking," he said slowly. I waited for him to finish his thought but he didn't.

"About what?" I finally asked.

"We decided that being in a fake relationship was just causing more pain than good."

"Pain?" I asked under my breath.

"Yeah," he chuckled, taking a step towards me. "But not who you are thinking is in pain."

I was about to take a step back when Peter reached forward and grabbed my hands, intertwining our fingers as he looked down.

"Lara Jean and I being together has been causing you pain." He looked up at me, studying my eyes, waiting for me to say something.

"No," I stuttered. "Why would you. . . Why would you think that?"

He sighed, sending me a knowing look. "Y/N," he whispered. "I know."

"You know what?" I asked, slowly.

"Lara Jean told me everything."

"What?" I stuttered, pulling my hands away from his. I turned around and walked across the kitchen to the microwave as I continued to ramble. "What are you talking about? Lara Jean is just. . . I mean. . . I never said. . ."

I gasped as Peter ran up, turned me around and instantly pressed his lips to mine. It took me a second before the shock wore off. As soon as it did, Peter pulled away. My lips were still pursed as he smiled, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.

"I'm so sorry, Y/N," he whispered, his hand still cupping my cheek. "If I had known sooner, I never would've. . . I never would've gotten into a fake relationship with your sister." He laughed as he annunciated sister. "Wow," he sighed. "I'm a major dick."

"No, you aren't," I said before I could stop myself. I bit my bottom lip, my cheeks burning from the way he was looking at me.

"So," he hesitated. "You don't hate me?"

"Of course not," I said, my voice barely above a whisper. "I don't hate you, Peter. I have. . . I've. . ."

Peter smirked as I continued to stutter. He reached up and cupped both of my cheeks in his hands. He waited a beat before leaning down and pressing his lips to mine. This time I didn't hesitate to kiss him back.

As our lips moved in sync, Peter let go of my face and wrapped his arms around my waist. I slid my hands up his chest, wrapping my arms around his neck.

He pulled away and leaned his forehead against mine as we caught our breaths.

"Y/N?" He whispered, his breath hitting my face. "Will you go on a date with me?"

I leaned back, nervously chewing on my bottom lip.

"I can't," I said, making his face drop. I smirked before adding, "I have a dance competition all day tomorrow."

He sent me a look before laughing as he pulled me closer to his chest.

"You Covey girls and your cruel sense of humor. I will never understand it."

[yetanotheremptypage]

Fic: Kiss Me Once (‘Cause You Know I’ve Had A Long Night)

Read on AO3

SUMMARY: Getting married is more tiring than it looks, but Lara Jean has Peter. Always and forever. (To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before movieverse; spoilers for TATB3)

No one had warned Lara Jean on just how much effort it took to get married. Not the planning— she was proud to say that she had helped plan two weddings prior to her own, so she felt confident in her ability to both get good deals and make it look like something she’d dreamed about at age 10. (And most years since then. But that was beside the point.) No, it was the actual weekend of getting married that she hadn’t been warned about.

Her dad and Trina’s wedding hadn’t been a big to-do, and despite being a bridesmaid, at seventeen, Lara Jean didn’t partake in all the bridal festivities. She did when Margot and Ravi got married a couple years ago, as the maid of honor, so she planned those festivities and had a great time. And most importantly, they happened well before the wedding itself.

Kitty, however, was her maid of honor—a decision made years ago in a three-way spit shake—and while Kitty respected her sister’s more eclectic taste, there was absolutely no way Lara Jean was getting married without an alcohol-fueled bachelorette party. Her younger sister was busy with grad school pretty much straight up to the wedding weekend, and Lara Jean’s bridesmaids were scattered across the country, so she made the decision to have her party two days before getting married. Which was… maybe not her best move.

She woke up on the day of the rehearsal dinner with a pounding headache and a glass of water and an aspirin already waiting on her bedside table. Peter had left for work, a half-day before school went on summer break. He’d gone to Stanford planning to major in history and figure the rest out later, but he took an education class on a whim second semester and absolutely fell in love with it. He got to work at an elementary school as part of the course, and he spent the whole semester talking all about the kids he worked with that day.

Now, he taught sixth grade history and absolutely adored it. In the spring, he coached the boys’ lacrosse team, too, which seemed to give him more stress than teaching. He’d tried to get her to apply for the vacant English position, attempting to bribe her with the chance to eat lunch together every day, but she loved working as an editor at the publishing house she’d been working with since junior year of college, so she declined. She was a little jealous that she had to go straight back to work once they got back from their honeymoon in Korea and he didn’t, but she’d get her revenge come the fall and he had to stay up late grading and writing lesson plans.

Both of her sisters joined her within the hour, equally hungover, to go over the list of everything left to do before she walked down the aisle at 5 PM tomorrow evening on a rooftop overlooking the city. Peter had joked they should get married on the Adler High lacrosse field. She’d seriously considered it for about thirty seconds, but getting married in New York felt more romantic. Not just because it was prettier, but because New York had become their home. It was where they lived together for the first time, where they’d become the people they were today. She wasn’t marrying the Peter she tackled on the track, or that she broke up with in the school parking lot (twice), or even the one she danced with in her dad’s wedding tent. It was only right they get married in the place they'd beaten all the odds on high school relationships. Because marriage was about stepping into the future, promising to grow and evolve for the rest of your life. Not about capturing the past.

And in order to that, she spent her day making sure the out-of-town guests arrived safely, checking over the venue, confirming catering, and praying to make it to the rehearsal—and, most importantly, the rehearsal dinner—in one piece.

Which she did. Barely. She did say “Peter Matthew Covey” when they practiced vows, but she was a little distracted by her little cousin, their flower girl, trying to eat one of the little wads of paper they’d given her to practice throwing down the aisle. (Peter didn't seem to mind, answering to "Covey" for the rest of the weekend.) Dinner was nice, family and friends appearing to get along and lovely toasts from her dad and Peter’s mom. But then Trevor whisked Peter away to their hotel before she even got to properly say goodbye, so she, much to Chris’s displeasure, moped the entire subway ride back to her Peter-less apartment.

He called her around midnight, though, claiming that he couldn’t see her on a voice call so it didn’t ruin anything. She complained about how much her feet hurt from the heels she’d worn and he told her about his day at work. When she woke up the next morning, it was too her alarm blaring under her ear, meaning she fell asleep on the phone. She didn’t even remember doing so, but she had both a ‘Night, Covey’ and a ‘Happy wedding day!’ text from Peter waiting for her when she woke up. Some things never changed.

Her dad cried when he saw her, and he gave her a letter that she was shocked to discover was from her mother. Margot hadn’t mentioned getting one on her wedding day, so she kept hers secret, too, and did her best not to ruin the make-up Gen had spent an hour on. She’d never expected to end college calling Gen one of her best friends, again, but she was immensely glad for it. Chris and Gen still weren’t close, but they’d agreed to a truce for the wedding weekend. Lara Jean still put her other college best friend, Zoey, in between them in the bridesmaid lineup, just to be safe.

Peter cried when he saw her, too, and when he said his vows. They’d written each other letters, to be shared once alone, and said generic vows instead, the same ones her dad and Trina had exchanged. They posed for what must’ve been thousands of pictures, Kitty and Owen trying to one-up each other in half of them, and then suddenly they were dancing their first dance to the same song they’d danced to the night they signed their new contract.

She loved her friends, and her family, and Peter’s friends and Peter’s family, but she just wanted to sit and eat and laugh at Kitty’s speech in which she took full credit for the wedding. Instead, she barely left the dance floor, had to beg Margot to guard her food from being taken away, and smiled for even more “candid” photos. She did get to laugh at Kitty’s speech, though. (And Trevor’s, but Kitty’s was better.)

Once they’d been sent off to their hotel room and finally got to be alone, Lara Jean collapsed directly on the bed.

“You good, wife?” Peter teased, plopping down next to her.

“I’m so tired. I’m never getting married again.”

“Well I should hope not.”

“Just do me now. I’ll lie here, and you do whatever you need to do to make it all official, and then I’ll sleep for a couple of years. Wake me then.”

“Sounds romantic.” She turned her head to look at him, his teasing smirk so reminiscent of their younger years. He looked the same, really. But now he was her husband. It made her giddy. Suddenly, she wasn’t quite so tired.

He pushed his head up onto his arm and said, “How about, we get changed into more comfy clothes, I’ll pop that champagne over there, and we can read our letters and gossip about our wedding guests? And then maybe later we’ll do other stuff.”

“I love you, Peter Kavinsky.”

“I love you, too,” he said, and he kissed her, tangling his hands into the hair that she’d left mostly down just for him. She rolled onto her side to reach him better, and then just onto him, and their plans changed rather quickly.

They stayed up for several hours more than she’d intended, in the end both of them all but collapsing into bed. Peter wrapped his arms around her to spoon, and she shut her eyes, trying to remember this moment, always and forever.

“Night, Kavinsky,” she said, like she said every night, and he kissed her temple.

“Night, Kavinsky,” he replied, and it was the greatest thing she’d ever heard.

[mierinette]

day 08 - secret dating

you secret's safe and no one, has to know i’m your getaway.

tumblr month: @auyeahaugust

links: ao3 | ff.net

IT happens gradually, then all at once.

First, it starts with Mylene and Ivan. Wholesome. And, Alya and Nino. Perfect. Then, Juleka and Rose. Adorable.

But afterwards, it somehow extends further; to people outside of their class. Nathaniel and Marc. Kim and Ondine. Sabrina and some boy in another class. Even Chloé had gotten a girlfriend over the summer, with Kagami finally accepting her after months of the former's wooing.

By the time they all return to class, Marinette, to her complete surprise (and in some parts, horror), finds that the apparent theme for their return to class is romance— and as far as everyone else is concerned, she's the exception.

(Except that Marinette's not. Not really— though she can't exactly yell that truth into the sky or anything.)

Instead, she huffs, braves through the lovey-dovey atmosphere, and takes a seat.

Only for Alya to rush right beside her, Nino in tow, to completely rub it in her face.

"Someone looks a little sour today," she smirks, eyes bright with amusement. "Not liking being back to school?"

"I just don't understand what happened to everyone after the break!" Marinette complains, waving her hands around in evident confusion. "What made everyone so weird!?"

"Love," Alya shrugs, saying it almost too simply. "Everyone spent their respective summer together, and dating just came as the most natural step." She turns to Marinette, shaking her head. "And if anything, you're the weird one here! Girl, you're the only single one left."

Well, she begged to differ.

Marinette shakes her head, then points at a pair at the other side of the room. "What about Max and Alix? They aren't dating anyone either!"

Alya rolls her eyes. "They're not interested in dating, remember?" She points out. "It's their choice to be single. You're single because you have no choice."

"That's not true, I—!"

"You…?"

Marinette pauses mid-sentence, and after an evident battle with herself, finally heaves a sigh of defeat. "Nothing," she finally grumbles, looking down.

God, the whole superhero-secret-identity thing was increasingly becoming a pain to deal with.

And the whole  superhero-dating-superhero  thing made it all  that much  more complicated.

"So I'm right," Alya decides to settle their conversation, crossing her arms over her chest. Marinette can't protest, and she only nods, though her expression shows anything but agreement.

"Fine," Marinette exhales, taking a deep breath to calm herself down. "But it's not that easy to find someone to date! I'm busy, and I don't really know anyone else my age outside of here," she gestures at the school. "And as you said, they're all taken. So I guess I'll just have to wait!"

She hopes that's enough to get Alya off her case.

Her best friend did take more kindly to reasoning and logic rather than a straightforward I don't want to date (because I have a boyfriend), after all.

But to her soon-to-be-realized horror, Marinette's statement does the complete opposite.

Alya shares a glance with her boyfriend, who smiles and nods. "Glad that's the only reason you're not out dating!"

"... why?"

She slides a paper through the desk. The glaring letters, couples coupon!, instill in Marinette a feeling of dread she never felt even in previous battles with Hawkmoth and the akumas.

This can't be real.

"Because that means you can't say no," she grins.

This is a joke.

"Tomorrow afternoon, at the café we visited last weekend," she continues.

This is a misunderstanding.

"Nino's friend will meet you there."

This isn't what she thinks it'll be, of course.

"Have fun on your blind date!"

Damn it, Alya.

.

.

Ladybug stops outside Adrien's room, and knocks on the window.

He's barely awake when he walks over, but the sleep almost fades away immediately as they lock eyes. Instead, he beams and runs toward the window, unlocking it so she can enter.

"What are you doing, Milady?" He asks, eyes sparkling. "I thought we weren't patrolling tonight?"

"We need to talk," she instead says.

Adrien panics. "Wait," he begins to flounder. "If this is because you're disappointed that I'm me— that I'm Adrien Agreste, I promise that I can be better, please don't take my Miraculous, or even worse, break up with me, milady, I love you so, so, much and…"

"What? No," Ladybug's quick to shake her head. "I'm not breaking up with you."

She can almost hear the relieved exhale that escapes his mouth. "Oh, phew! That would've been a catastrophe…"

Ladybug feels a smile form on her face. "So, losing me is even worse than losing your Miraculous, huh?"

He's flustered. "I mean— I do take my job seriously! And I love being Chat Noir. It's just that… I can't lose you, either." Adrien walks toward her, then presses a kiss to her knuckles. "Milady, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me."

She flushes red, then looks away. "Same to you."

Adrien beams, then sits down, gesturing for her to sit next to him. "So what did you want to talk about?"

It's hard to decide what to say. So she decides to tell it to him straight.

"I'm going on a date with someone else tomorrow."

It's a terrible idea.

He panics, again. "Wait, so you're not breaking up with me, so… you want an open relationship?" Adrien looks almost scandalized. "I'm not sure how I feel about sharing you with anyone else…"

"No!" Ladybug interrupts, shaking her head vehemently. "It's just… for my civilian identity. My friend wants me to go on a blind date, and she can't know that about you, so…," She sighs, then looks down at her lap. "I had no choice, I'm sorry."

Ladybug's surprised when his hands come to hold her own. "Hey, as long as you know you're meowne," he smiles. "And I'm yours— I don't see a problem with it."

She's about to thank him, when he suddenly continues. "You know, this wouldn't be an issue if you just told me who you were…"

"You know I can't do that."

"But you know my true identity!" Adrien argues, gesturing to himself. "I don't understand why I can't know yours."

"I know because I'm the Guardian," Ladybug tries to reason with him. "That's the reason I know everyone else who holds it—"

"But I'm not like them." Adrien finally argues, sighing as the words leave his mouth. "We got our Miraculous together. We were partners, before we became a team of superheroes. I was here for you, with you, since the beginning. And… I thought you trusted me."

The last part comes almost as a whisper, but she can hear it loud and clear. Ladybug takes a deep breath and shifts, staring him in the eye. "I do trust you," she attempts to explain. "It's just… complicated."

"What is?!"

"I don't want you to be disappointed with me!" Ladybug finally shouts, shrinking back as her statement hangs in the air.

Adrien's at a loss for words, and before he can even attempt to respond, Ladybug tears her hands away and stands. When he gets his bearings, she's already one foot outside the window.

"I'm sorry," she only says. "I think I just… I just need to process everything." Ladybug smiles, though it's evidently conflicted. "I'll see you soon, Chat."

Then, without another word, she leaves.

.

.

Marinette paces in front of the cafe, thumbs twiddling together in apparent nervousness.

Her mind's full. She can't concentrate on the impending date at all— her conversation with Adrien, with Chat Noir, still as fresh in her memory, replaying in her mind as if it were a bad omen.

She yawns, a direct result of a dire lack of sleep. Marinette spent the majority of the night speaking with Tikki, seeking her advice on the matter; and her only response was, "listen to your heart".

Marinette knows what her heart says. What her heart yearns for.

She just doesn't know if she has the strength to say it.

When a stranger calls her, it takes three times for him to say her name until she notices.

"Marinette Dupain-Cheng?"

That was probably her date, then.

Holding back the intense need to snap at him, Marinette takes a deep breath. She smiles, then turns toward him.

"Yes, that's me. You're Nino's friend, the—?"

She pauses.

Everything seems to slow down and fade away. The world stills. Her mind stops.

All she can see is him.

"I— uh," Adrien scratches his head. "Yeah, that's me. Sorry, I had no idea this was a date, Nino just told me I was meeting a friend until a few minutes ago, and…," he flounders.

Now that was familiar.

"I'm just in love with someone else, so I don't think I can go through with this, I'm so sorry I made you come all this way—"

"You always did apologize too much."

Adrien looks up, evidently confused. "I'm sorry, have we met before…?"

"So you love me, but you can't recognize me at all, huh?"

"No way…"

Marinette smiles, and it's a mix of nervousness and excitement and fear and love and everything else all at once. "Hi, kitty," she begins. "I hope this isn't too disappointing, but…"

She can't say another word, because suddenly she's being scooped up and carried as Adrien holds her in his arms. He's beaming, and his eyes are almost overflowing with joy.

Marinette feels her heart full. When he sets her down, his hands never leave her waist.

"Milady," he breathes, burying his nose into her neck. "I love you— so much."

"My chaton," Marinette replies, full of care. Full of joy. Full of admiration and awe that this was truly happening. That the fates had worked completely in their favor.

"I love you too."

[blouisparadise]

Here is a list of amazing bottom Louis fics that were posted or completed during the month of January. Between the second month of the Bottom Louis Fic Fest and all the other fics that authors posted throughout the month, it’s clear that this was a great way to start off the year of bottom Louis fics!  Happy reading!

1) You Can Be The Boss Daddy | Explicit | 1641 words

This is just Louis being used and humiliated by his strong Daddy

2) Don't Pretend That I Don't Entice You | Explicit | 2086 words

“Speaking of which, he couldn't wait to get home to see him. They both worked long days and most of the time their days off didn't line up. But they made up for things like that when they could, spending hours cuddling in bed and talking about the randomest of things or ya know, having mind-blowing sex that left them sated and panting, heated limbs tangled together and breaths and scents mingling. Harry enjoyed those moments quite a bit, if he was going to be at all honest.”

3) The Sound Of Music | Explicit | 2602 words

Harry quietly makes his way down the stairs and into the large foyer, the marble floors are cold against his bare feet and he regrets not taking his slippers.

The tinkling of piano keys flirts its way to his ears and he turns his head in the direction of their living room. His mouth quirks sideways with a smile and he makes his way towards the music.

4) Letters From Boston | Explicit | 3316 words

Louis’s standing in the kitchen when he opens the first letter.

5) Starlight In Your Eyes Of Blue | Mature | 4434 words

Harry is in New York while Louis is back home at London waiting for Harry’s return. Unfortunately, Harry may be unable to come back home in time for Christmas and most importantly—Louis’ birthday. Louis can’t wait any longer to be in a bed that’s no longer empty but in the end it changes.

6) I Couldn’t Get Away From You | Mature | 5185 words

Suddenly in the heat of the moment, Harry’s eyes turned darker as he pushed Louis’ back more and more towards the wall. “Fine.” He plants his lips on Louis’ and begins to roughly kiss him, soon enough turning it into a make-out session.

“Fuck you, Styles,” Louis moans and grips onto Harry’s shoulders, hands trailing up to the taller’s hair and gripping that as well.

“We’ll see about that.”

7) My Kingdom for Your Graces | Explicit | 5257 words

Louis gets a last minute day off and Harry decides to surprise him with a visit. They proceed to do what lovers do.

8) I Think I'm In Love | Mature | 6019 words

Louis' a young man looking for love. Harry's a sugar daddy looking for a new sub. They meet through a dating app and decide to try out a relationship.

9) Daddy's Little Kitty | Mature | 7224 words

Harry Styles is a gentle master. But what happens when Louis pushes him to his limits?

10) There's More Than One Place To Call Home | Explicit | 8416 words

Harry never asked for much from his neighbors - he didn't care about barking animals during the day or loud talking during the night.

The only thing he needed was silence when he was writing. And that was the only thing his new neighbor wouldn't give him.

Deciding to confront the loud guy who lived next door, Harry found himself ringing his doorbell one night. And that decision just may be the best thing that's ever happened to Harry.

11) Cooking With Styles | Explicit | 9119 words

Anyone can cook— or so they say.

12) Watching The World Fall | Explicit | 11777 words

This segment has been going on long enough that Louis knows what’s coming before James starts in on it, trying to sell him on something he knows that Louis wouldn’t normally be buying. But there’s four cameras surrounding him, and an audience watching him expectantly, so if Louis wants to continue convincing people that he’s doing just fine, he’s going to have to go along with it.

“We have a whole host of single men backstage waiting to meet you, Louis,” James tells him. “We want to help you find love tonight, on Late Late Live Tinder. Is this okay? Do you want to play?”

It actually kind of makes sense that his first date after the break-up is going to be just as public as said break-up. Something like coming full circle.

“Alright, James,” Louis agrees, hopping down off his stool.

“Okay, come down to the stage,” James says. Louis can’t even tell whether the excitement in his voice is genuine or not. “Right now, come on down!”

13) We'll Be the Fine Line | Not Rated | 13443 words

Louis listens to Fine Line, and, drunk, he leaves a voicemail for Harry after months of not speaking. This reminds Harry of a time before everything fell apart, slowly, painfully, a time when the two of them were still in love. And he desperately wants to go back.

14) (You're Gonna See Me In A) New Light | Mature | 13631 words

A fake relationship au where everyone knows it's real but Louis.

15) Don't Know If I Could Ever Go Without | Explicit | 14140 words

“We’ve come up with a solid solution. You’re not going to like it.”

“What is it?” Louis narrows his eyes suspiciously, glancing at a visibly enthusiastic Liam.

“What if you pretended to be an Alpha?” Zayn suggests.

16) Something Wicked This Way Comes | Explicit | 16526 words

A regency murder mystery au where Louis is married to an earl and Harry is a detective. Hatchets are buried but not everyone is as they seem.

17) Keep It Sweet In Your Memory | Explicit | 17039 words

'How'd it go?' Harry pushes them into Niall's room and shuts the door behind him, so Georgia doesn't overhear.

'It was good. We just caught up, mostly... I may have done something a little stupid, though.'

And Niall's eyebrows are in his hairline at that.

'I mean. Okay, so I invited Louis out on Saturday.'

'Saturday? Your--'

'Yes, my bachelor party...' and then Harry has to explain himself, 'I just felt guilty. I think. He was like. Telling me he wanted to hook up.'

'He WHAT!?'

'No. I mean, not with me. Like. He wants to go out and meet people.'

'He'll hate that. He's too much of a romantic.'

'Yeah, well. Whatever his name was messed him up a little, it would seem.'

18) UN(RE)SOLVED | Explicit | 20873 words

The ghoul boys are back, but this time around there are some unresolved feelings involved. Harry is a skeptic, Louis is not. Watch them go on their ongoing investigation into the question: are ghosts real?

Or, BuzzFeed Unsolved AU.

19) The Way The Storms Blow | Explicit | 21649 words

Louis doesn’t have a habit of thinking about Harry’s dick.

That would be weird, seeing as they’re best mates, and they share a flat, and they’ve spent holidays at each other’s family homes. Their friendship hasn’t ever risen to a point where Louis should want to see his mate’s dick, and he’s happy to keep it that way.

Except, all that Louis can think about is exactly that. The size of it. The shape. The amount of people it’s been in.

Maybe it’s the tequila talking, or the fact that Louis’ just recently walked in to an eyeful of Harry taking turns on some slags that he’s never seen before, but. Louis’ mind can’t stop obsessing over the idea.

20) Hold Onto This Heaven (Of Yours) | Explicit | 25213 words

an ode to being too young, too sad, and too in love.

(aka: a college au, harry is a frat boy, and louis wants to know all of his secrets.)

21) Weightless | Explicit | 25330 words

He hopes that Harry still thinks of him. God knows Louis thinks of him every day.

Or: Harry is the best dragon racer the world has ever seen and Louis is an almost-vet who feels like he is carrying the weight of the world.

22) Creep | Explicit | 26092 words

Harry is a wallflower, louis is a sophomore brat with a heart of gold no one seems to notice, harry, a senior, is a musician in disguise. louis finds him in the music room, Harry performing his self written song Creep on a talent show. he steals Louis' heart and begins to stalk Harry on social media, finding out the boy is gorgeous inside and out, tattoos popping against his milky skin, unashamed of his amazing body.

a story of a boy with dark thoughts finding his way through the dark with his light guiding him.

23) Blue Lotus | Explicit | 29815 words

Note: This fic is Louis/OMC.

After the Second Rebellion and the dismantling of President Cowell’s regime, Louis struggles to make sense of life.

A post-Hunger Games AU.

24) You Contain In Your Eyes The Sunset And The Dawn | Mature | 38152 

Harry Styles was to spend six months at AT&T Inc. of all telecommunications companies in the world, also known as the largest one in its field. This was the biggest deal of his life; it will both improve his expertise in the domain and maybe secure the job of his dreams. There was only one problem standing in the way, and it came in the form of a stunning, irresistible and intimidating cat hybrid of the name Louis Tomlinson. In other words, his boss.words

25) We Can Go On Forever (When Everything’s Gone Forever) | Mature | 39421

Harry spent most of his adult life focused on either his studies or his books - 5 of which he has already had published before he was 30. Immediately after completing his dissertation, he was offered a lectureship at Cambridge University where he’s been for 2 years now.

This wasn’t the first time in his life that he had felt the incessant itch to know more about a subject by any means. However, this was the first time the subject had been an Omega.

26) Canyon Moon | Explicit | 40895 words

For as long as Louis has remembered, he has been promised to be mated to Harry, his best friend and the future pack alpha. But Louis’s heart belonged to the forest and to the hunt more than he could ever imagine it belonging to Harry.

Then Harry’s father dies in a violent accident, and Louis’s future alpha disappears on the wind.

An A/B/O Lion King AU

27) Strangers In Love | Explicit | 42207 words

Louis wakes up to find himself in a marriage with the last man he thought he'd ever end up with.

28) If You're Out There (I'll Find You Somehow) | Explicit | 55916 words

Harry looks so intensely into Louis’ eyes it’s as though he’s reaching in and touching his very soul. “I never thought… I never… I’ve been searching for so long, Louis, but I never gave up. I couldn’t stop, wouldn’t stop trying,” Harry says, bottom lip trembling as he strokes the backs of Louis’ knuckles. “I just knew that if you were out there, I’d find you somehow.”

OR the story of how one man’s love changed the world.

29) “If I Cut Out a Heart...” | Explicit | 66225 words

Stripper au! louis is a stripper who’s known for his huge ass. he works at a club owned by harry and everyone wants to fuck him. eventually louis has sex with each of the boys, separately and perhaps eventually all together in a big gang bang. lots of focus on louis’s big bum (even twerking, jiggling, etc.)

30) You Smell Like | Explicit | 185369 words

The one where Louis is the Alpha’s mate and everyone is aware of it except for Louis and Harry. Go figure!

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

You can find other monthly roundup fic rec lists here.

[quickspinner]

My Favorite Inspiration

Here’s my entry for the @lovebugs-and-snakecharmers event! The prompt was snuggles/cuddles and forehead kisses. I hope you enjoy  @blue-bell-rising !

“Oooh,” Luka said, halfway up through the hatch to Marinette’s room. “That’s not a good face.”

Marinette moaned, turned her chair back to the desk, and flopped down on it, burying her face in her arms. “I can’t do this, Luka,” she groaned. 

“Well, I don’t believe that for a minute,” Luka said, coming the rest of the way into her room. He slipped off the strap of his guitar case, and laid it gently on the ground, and then went to Marinette, laying a hand on her back and rubbing it lightly. “You absolutely can do it.” 

“You don’t even know what I’m talking about,” Marinette grumbled, turning her head enough to peek at him with one eye. 

“I don’t need to,” Luka leaned down to give her a cheeky grin. “You can do anything you put your mind to, I’ve seen it. But go ahead and tell me what’s giving you trouble.”

Without lifting her head, Marinette reached out, slapping blindly on her desk for a moment, before her hand finally landed on a loose piece of paper. She grabbed it and held it up.

Luka took it, straightening up to read it, though he kept one hand on Marinette’s back. “Junior Design Contest,” he read, “Sponsored by Teen Vogue Paris.” He snorted. “See? I was right. You absolutely can do it.”

“I can’t,” Marinette moaned, still face-down on the desk. “I’ve been trying for hours. Nothing is working. Everything I come up with is terrible and derivative! Unoriginal! It’ll be so bad that not only will the judging committee laugh themselves stupid at my proposal, they’ll probably pass it around in the industry for laughs and I’ll be blacklisted and then it’ll end up in classes for young design students as an example of what NOT to do and—”

“Whoa, whoa, breathe, Marinette,” Luka reached forward and stroked her cheek with the back of his fingers. “Come on, sit up and look at me.” 

Marinette let out a heavy sigh, and then did as he asked, leaning back until she was slumped in her chair and pouting up at him. “Luuuukaaaa,” she whined. 

“Hey.” Luka reached down and turned her chair around, and then pulled it back with him to the chaise so they were sitting knee to knee. “Okay, you’ve had your little pity party,” he teased. “But you and I both know that Marinette Dupain-Cheng does not back down from a challenge. Is this contest really something you want to do?”

“Well...yes,” she sighed. “I mean, the derby hat contest was cool but it was pretty small-scale. Teen Vogue Paris, there’ll be hundreds of designs submitted. If I could make the top ten in a competition like that, it would really mean something. But I’ve been so busy, I didn’t find out about it until yesterday, and I really have to crank something out if I want to make the submission deadline. And I’ve been trying but I’ve got nothing!” She ended in a wail, throwing her hands up.

Luka smiled to himself, and took her hands. “Marinette, I’ve never known anyone with a mind that works like yours,” he said seriously, cradling her hands in his. “You’re smart and creative and fantastic under pressure. I know sometimes when you’re on a short timeline, it can feel like you have to get it right the first time and you can’t always let your creative process work itself out. But you need to just take a breath, and let it happen. Forget about the deadline for a little bit. You can’t make a plan to meet it until you know what you want to do. You’re trying to jump to step seven and you need to start back at one. Just let the ideas flow for now.” 

Marinette gave him an uncertain look. 

Luka moved his hands up to cup her face and leaned forward to kiss her forehead tenderly. “Whatever’s going on in here,” he whispered against her skin, “It’s going to be brilliant and amazing.” He kissed her forehead again, and then her nose. “So just let it come out, give your imagination some room to breathe. Don’t edit yourself. You can sort it all out later.” He sat back. “Will you come take a walk with me, maybe talk it out a bit? I’m a good listener.” They both smiled at that.

“Well…” Marinette sighed. “I guess I’m not getting anything done here, so...sure, let’s go for a walk.” 

Luka grinned, and waited while she got her things together and tucked her sketchbook under her arm. He strapped his guitar back on, and together they went downstairs and out into the sunshine. Luka smiled to himself as Marinette took a deep breath by his side. She slipped her hand into his and he could feel some of the tension leave her. Luka laced their fingers together. “Anywhere in particular you want to walk?” 

“Anywhere’s fine,” Marinette shrugged. 

“Okay.” Luka gave her hand a little tug to get them started. “So, tell me about these ideas that you decided wouldn’t work.”

“Well, at first I thought—“ 

Luka listened as she listed ideas and dismissed them just as quickly. There was one, though, that she kept circling back to, and the smile on his face grew slowly as her words flowed faster and her step got bouncy and her eyes lit up. “There we go,” he murmured to himself, and allowed a satisfied smile to settle on his face as he concentrated on guiding Marinette through the streets, tugging her around obstacles and out of the way of hazards. 

Suddenly he realized they were near the Liberty and had to laugh at himself. He’d led her there automatically. “Think you’re ready to start sketching?” he asked the next time Marinette paused for breath. He nodded to where the boat could be seen in the distance.

“Oh. Oh!” Marinette blinked, just as surprised as he’d been. “Yeah, that would be great actually.” She giggled and Luka grinned. 

Rose and Juleka were hanging out on deck, so Luka and Marinette went below and curled up side by side on Luka’s bed. Luka got out his guitar and occupied himself with it as Marinette began to sketch.

“There,” she sighed finally, putting her pencil down and stretching her fingers. “I can work with this. It’s enough for the proposal, at least, and I can keep refining it after submission so that I’ll be ready if I make the first cut.”

“Will you hit me if I say I told you so?” 

“Absolutely.”

“Okay,” Luka chuckled. “Then I won’t. Even though I totally did.”

Marinette dug her elbow into his ribs. Luka winced away and grabbed her hand, and in the ensuing struggle, Marinette’s sketchbook slid from her lap, bounced off the edge of the bed, and landed on the floor.

“I got it,” Luka grunted, shoving her hands away. He leaned down and reached out one long arm to snag the book from the floor.

“Thank you, Luka,” Marinette said gratefully, but when she tried to take the book, Luka didn’t let go. She looked at him and found he was staring down at the sketchbook. 

“What’s this?” he asked, turning it towards her. The pages had flipped when it fell and it was now open to a design for a jacket with a very familiar blue and pink lightning bolt down one sleeve, a scattering of pink and blue stars on the other arm, and triangular details along the shoulders that echoed the shoulder piece of his stage costume.

Marinette groaned, trying to snatch the book back from him. “Oh, no, that was supposed to be a surprise.” Luka let her take it reluctantly, and then slipped his arm around her waist.

“I really like it,” he said quietly, nuzzling her cheek. “Can I see the rest of it?” 

“What makes you think there’s more?” Marinette said lightly, and Luka chuckled. He pulled her over his leg to sit her in front of him so he could wrap his arms around her waist.

“Please?” he said, resting his chin on her shoulder. “I’m sorry for ruining the surprise, but I’d really like to see what else you have. It looked awesome.”

Marinette sighed, and pouted a bit, but she opened the book and turned it to the next page so he could see the back of the jacket. It had Luka’s name on the back in pointy letters, and the kitty section mask logo, personalized with a blue horn and his lightning bolt over the eye.

“I was just playing with some ideas for merchandise that I wanted to show you guys,” sighed Marinette, “But I got so into it and started adding all these details, and I decided to keep it back and try to make it for your birthday.” She groaned. “Ugh, now my whole plan is ruined!”

Luka squeezed her tight, and she leaned back against him and let her head fall against his shoulder. “It’s not ruined,” he said in her ear. “I love it, Marinette, I really do. Now I get to be excited the whole time you’re making it. Have you started yet? Can I go shopping with you?”

“I haven’t started yet,” Marinette replied, amused. “And no, if I let you go shopping with me you’ll end up paying for something and I’m not going to let that happen.” 

“It’d be the least I could do when you’re going through all this work.”

“I knew you’d say that.” Marinette elbowed him, more gently this time. “It’s a gift. That’s not now gifts work.” 

Luka leaned around her and curled a finger under her chin, turning her face back up towards him. “It’s enough of a gift that you even thought enough of me to create something like this, let alone make it for me with your own two hands.” He kissed her forehead tenderly, almost reverently. “You’re going to do great things, Marinette. I’m honored to be even a small part of it.” 

Marinette turned red and spluttered, dropping the sketchbook in her lap as she covered her flaming cheeks. “Luka! How can you just say things like that?”

“Because they’re true,” Luka said, grinning, letting her face forward and hugging her close again. “Now come on, tell me more.” 

“Well,” Marinette sighed, picking up the sketchbook again and turning back to the front view. “I guess since the surprise is ruined I might as well ask what you’d prefer. Do you like Juleka’s star on the other sleeve? I know how close you are so I thought maybe—but if you don’t like it we could just leave that sleeve plain...I think two lightning bolts would be too much though—”

“I love the stars,” Luka smiled, resting his chin back on her shoulder. “I love that you thought to put Juleka’s symbol on it for me.”

“And for the color of the jacket itself, do you think white, grey, or black? I could do it in blue but I don’t think the details would stand out so much…”

“What were you thinking?” Luka asked.

“Well, I know you don’t wear a lot of white, but—” Marinette went on about the pros and cons of the different choices, more thinking out loud than asking his opinion, but her face began to redden as she slowly became aware that Luka was cuddling closer and closer, curling around her, his chin still on his shoulder, his arms tight around her waist, his chest pressed against her back. 

“You’re so amazing,” he said, and the genuine admiration in his voice was enough to render her speechless. Marinette meeped quietly and turned in his arms, burying her face into his shoulder. “Aw, come on,” he teased, moving one hand to rub it along her back. “It’s the truth, I should be allowed to say it.” 

“Well, what about you?” Marinette pushed back, looking at him with a determined pout. “Does that mean I get to compliment you until you can’t talk?”

Luka laughed lightly. “Go ahead,” he teased, rubbing his nose lightly against hers. “I don’t blush as easily as you.” 

“Oh yeah?” Marinette never backed down from a challenge. She turned to gave him fully and got up on her knees so that her face was level with his. Luka sat back slightly, leaning back on his hands, the amused smile still on his face. Marinette planted her hands on his shoulders.

“You’re a great listener,” Marinette began, “And you’re a great brother. I know you’re always supporting Juleka and watching out for her.” He continued to look at her placidly, though there might have been just the faintest bit of color in his face. She wasn’t sure. “You’re an amazing musician. Kitty Section would fall apart without you.” Okay, that got some definite color, and a slight change of expression, like he wanted to deny that last part. That gave her an idea. She licked her lips and adjusted her position slightly as she prepared her next attack.

“You’re always encouraging everyone around you. You welcomed Adrien when he showed up. You’re always complimenting the other band members and when you have criticisms, you’re so thoughtful about it that nobody minds hearing it from you.” Okay, she was closer to the mark. There was definite color in his cheeks now. “You’re a natural leader and you do it so gently no one resents you for taking charge.”

“Marinette,” he said, looking away. “That’s—“

“True,” she insisted. Time to go in for the kill. “And you inspire me,” she told him, a slow smile growing over her face. “You always encourage me and give me a safe place to create. No matter how stuck or frustrated I am, you make me feel better. You’re kind and selfless and you always know what I need. So I think your mind is just as brilliant as mine, even if it maybe works a little bit differently.” She leaned up and kissed his forehead as he’d done for her, and Luka made an inarticulate noise, pulling her to him so he could bury his now very red face in her shoulder.

“I win,” Marinette said cheekily, giggling as she moved her legs out from under her to settle more comfortably into his embrace.

“You forgot something,” he mumbled from her shoulder.

“Yes?”

“I have Jagged Stone’s personal designer making my birthday present.”

Marinette laughed and put her arms around him. 

[cynicalrainbows]

The Next Best Thing Chapter 10

Next chapter!

Comments always very welcome and encouraged please!

(And Cathy will mellow towards Anna soon, I promise! Just...y’know, friendship politics are complex when you’re 7.)

Just as Cathy suspected, they hear all about the sleepovers Anna has been on with her friends back in Germany: Greta, who has a swimming pool in the garden that a hedgehog drowned in, and Greta’s Vati had to get it out with a stick, and Hedda, who’s Mutti let them make chocolate crispy cakes for supper, and Sofie, who has an older brother called Mortiz who let them stay in the room while he watched a scary, scary film about a clown that lived in the drain (until Sofie’s Mutti saw what they were watching and gave them popsicles in exchange for promising not to tell their own parents).

It all sounds amazing, except that nothing like that will happen at Anne’s sleepover, Cathy knows.

Anne’s family doesn’t have a pool. Also, Anne’s Mum doesn’t let them in the kitchen (Jane lets Anne bake with her sometimes but the sleepover isn’t at Jane’s house, so that’s no good), and although Anne has an older brother (called George), he doesn’t live with them.

(George lives in London. Cathy has never seen him but she knows that he goes to the Royal College of Art, which is like a school you go to when you’re grown up.

It sounded quite exciting when he first went because it sounded like he was going to paint pictures for a king or a queen, and she and Anne wondered if maybe they’d get to visit him and meet a prince or a princess….but it’s actually nothing like that at all.

Not only does George not paint pictures for anyone even a little bit royal, he doesn’t paint pictures at all.

 Instead, he makes sculptures, which are like people made of clay, except Anne hasn’t seen any of them apart from a picture of one she saw by accident that George had sent in a letter.  Anne said that the clay person didn’t have any clothes on at all, but that she didn’t really see it properly because her Dad saw she was looking at it and snatched it away and made her go up to her room.

She and Cathy giggled all day at the thought of George spending all his time in London making things like that (it’s more evidence that grown ups are really very strange) but Anne’s Mum and Dad don’t find it funny at all, Anne says.

They do lots of cross sighing about waste of money and terrible life choices and utterly obscene whenever Jane asks about him or when he sends them a Christmas card.

 The cards always have pictures that aren’t in the LEAST bit Christmassy on them- once, there was just a photo of a dead cow in a tank- and Anne’s mum and Dad sighed and shook their heads and then put the card in a drawer. 

Once, Anne snuck one out for Jane to read to her because George’s handwriting is too scrawly-small for her to decipher.

 Happy Holidays and all that jazz to little sis, don’t let them grind you down, and tell Janey thanks for her ceaseless efforts to try and smooth stuff over, stay cool x

She thinks Jane left some bits out because the card was full of writing, written all smudgy like the pen has been pressed too hard into the page, that would have surely meant more words. 

But Jane just says the rest is grown up stuff that she shouldn’t worry about.

George hasn’t sent a card for a while though. So chances of him being around to let them watch a scary clown film are low.)

It makes Cathy worried that the lack of older-brothers-with-scary-films and/or swimming pools is going to make Anna turn up her nose at Anne’s sleepover- but she seems just as excited as they are when they’re talking about it.

She shows them both where she’s made a little tally of days to tick off until Saturday in her News book (because the sleepover is sort of like news- it’s news-before-it-happens) and after a while, Cathy gets caught up enough in planning the pillow fortress they’ll make that she stops thinking about how annoying it is that Anna talks about Germany All. The. Time. and thinks about how much fun it will be instead.

Because it will be fun.

Even if Anna is there.

Or maybe because Anna will be there because annoyingly….Anna does have some good ideas.

Sometimes.

And as much as she doesn’t want to, as much as she wants to just hope that Anna goes back to Germany one day soon (or at least to another school)...she actually finds that sometimes, she’s really glad Anna is at their school and not at another.

It’s Anna, after all, who has the idea of excavating the big bit of rock that’s sticking half way out of the school field to see if it’s a dinosaur bone that they’ll be able to sell to a museum for lots of money.

(They don’t get very far, because they have to use twigs instead of proper little trowels and brushes but it’s still exciting to think that maybe that IS what it is and to talk about what it would be like to be famous.)

And it’s Anna who teaches the whole class ‘Feur, Wasser, Blitz, Sturm’ which they get to play instead of normal P.E, and they spend the hour flinging themselves flat to avoid the ‘feur’ (which means ‘fire’) and scrambling up the climbing ropes to escape the ‘wasser’ (which is water), and Cathy thinks it’s a thousand times more fun than having to demonstrate again and again that no matter how hard she tries, she cannot do a cartwheel OR stand on her head for the hundredth time.

So.

Having Anna at the school isn’t ALL bad.

Still, it’s very confusing, and Catalina, for once, is no help at all.

She is in fact annoyingly insistent on telling her that she is to always be ‘nice’ to Anna, and she reminds her lots of times that while she doesn’t have to play with Anna if she doesn’t want to, she is absolutely not allowed to stop Anne from playing with her or from ever discouraging Anna from playing with Anne and I mean it, mija.

She actually looks quite stern and serious when she says it, and it’s a bit uncomfortable to have Catalina look at her like that, so she promises that she won’t.

Still.

It is very confusing.

*

The days drag until the weekend but eventually, Saturday comes.

She’s so excited she can’t finish her breakfast, so excited that she can barely sit still.

(She’s going to a sleepover like a- well, not a grown up but like one of the older girls at school, like one of the characters on television. It’s breathtakingly thrilling.)

Catalina walks her to Anne’s parents house and reminds her about brushing her teeth and saying please and thank you, then hugs her so tightly that she nearly can’t breathe.

‘It’s going to be strange not having you in the flat tonight, mija.’

Cathy thinks that’s a funny thing to say when not all that long ago she was never in the flat at all- but before she can say it, she realises she sort of understands what Catalina means. 

It’s exciting because she’s going to stay at Anne’s house ALL night….but also, she realises now….that means she’s not going to be sleeping in her own room.

The thought of sleeping somewhere else- now that she’s thinking about it- is strange. 

Not bad exactly, but...different, and she realises that her bedroom in the flat has become her room rather than her-room-at-Catalina’s-flat without her even noticing it. 

She wonders, if she was to sleep in the bedroom of her old house now, whether that would feel like going home or whether it would feel strange. 

She wonders if somehow, by some bit of magic or maybe a genie, she was able to sleep in her old bedroom and have everything back to how it was- Mum and Dad in their room down the hall and all her old books, the copies that Catalina didn’t buy back for her, and the clothes that didn’t fit anymore and that got left behind when she was having to pack her things and the toy farm that she didn’t really play with anymore but that she missed the shape of all the same….she wonders if it would feel normal.

Would it feel normal or would she find herself missing Catalina kissing her goodnight and making sure to close the curtains so that there isn’t even the tiniest gap that a scary face could peep through?

 (Catalina once asked her what constitutes a scary face.

 ‘Like a monster, mija?’

 She said no because monsters aren’t real obviously but that not being real doesn’t also mean that they couldn’t look through her window if they wanted to and that monster or not, any face looking through her curtains in the dark would be a scary face.

Catalina nodded and said that since the flat is on the fifth floor, she can see how anything at all looking through her window could be rather disconcerting and that she will make sure to always shut her curtains specially tight to keep out any and all mysterious faces.

She likes that Catalina never tries to use adult explanations to make her not be scared of things, she never tells her that she’s being wrong or silly, even when she knows it is, a bit.)

‘Will you miss me?’

(She wonders suddenly if Catalina will enjoy having the flat back to how it was, if it will make her miss not Cathy but her old life.)

But Catalina nods emphatically before the worry has really had a chance to take hold.

‘Of course, querida. But you shall have such a wonderful time and tell me all about it tomorrow, yes?’

She nods.

‘And you’ll be able to give Anne her birthday present too.’

(She refused to make a card for Anne- although she normally would: card making still makes her feel a bit sick. But she’s proud of how fancy her writing inside the shop brought card looks- all in joined up writing and written with Catalina’s special expensive heavy fountain pen. And she’s proud of the wrapping paper- green with little red dinosaurs all over it- and of the green ribbon it’s tied up with (and of how she managed to curl the ends with scissors all by herself) and she’s most proud of the present itself.

It’s hard picking out presents for Anne, just because she gets new toys a LOT. 

(Kitty does too but she often doesn’t play with them because according to Kitty, Pink Kitty would be sad. For some reason, she prefers hunching up in the playhouse Jane made her out of a fridge box with Pink Kitty to riding in her tiny pink electric car. 

Neither Cathy nor Anne can understand this.)

Anne doesn’t have loyalties like that- she likes getting new things. 

Not just for her birthday or Christmas- last year, Anne got a big new dollhouse for no reason at all and it was the best surprise ever because it just turned up one day in the playroom without a word being said. 

It did spoil it just a tiny bit that getting the dollhouse meant she didn’t get anything for her birthday a week later (because apparently only very greedy little girls would have expected another present after getting the dolls house, according to Anne’s mum) but the dollhouse itself was still excellent, with its lights that turned on and off and all the furniture that matched.

It does make it hard to choose presents for Anne though, because she has so much stuff.

Still. She’s very proud of this present.

They’re standing on the doorstep for all of this, and they haven’t knocked yet, so it’s a surprise when the door opens right up and Catalina gives a very little scream and puts her hand to her chest.

‘Catalina! And Cathy! How are you both?’

Jane is standing in front of them, smiling delightedly, and there’s a small pink Kitty-sized figure holding onto her hand. 

Cathy waves at her and Kitty hides her face in Jane’s skirt.

‘Anne will be so happy you’re here, Cathy! And-’ Jane lowers her voice slightly, turning to Catalina. ‘It’s so good to be able to say thank you again. For-….’

‘Oh it was nothing-’ Catalina waves her hand, and with it, waves away all the scariness from last week. ‘No trouble at all.’ She cranes her neck a little to look behind Jane. ‘Hello, Kitty.’

Kitty presses herself further into Jane, whimpering until Jane picks her up.

‘Can you hello nicely to Catalina, Kitty-Kat?’

It does not seem, from the lack of response, like she can.

‘She isn’t scary!’ Cathy adds earnestly. She’s trying to be helpful but both Jane and Catalina smile as if she’s said something funny, and then Jane’s smile fades.

‘Sorry, she’s just going through a-’

‘It’s completely fine-’ 

‘Strangers are just-’

‘Honestly, don’t worry-’

‘We’re working on it-’

While they’re talking, Kitty risks peeking out at them all- and then stares, transfixed.

After a moment, they all follow her gaze- to the necklace Catalina is wearing. It’s a little silver tiger on a chain- one of Cathy’s favourites and she can see immediately why Kitty is taken with it too.

‘Do you like it, Kitty?’

Kitty flinches back at Catalina talking to her directly- but then pauses before burying her face in Jane’s neck again, as if she’s weighed up her options and chosen to keep looking at this new and wonderful thing.

She nods solemnly, not taking her eyes off it.

‘Would you like to hold it?’

She nods again.

‘You don’t have to-’ Jane interrupts. ‘It’s kind of you to offer but please don’t feel like you have to- We can look with our eyes not our hands, sweetheart.’

‘Oh it’s alright, it wasn’t at all expensive.’ Catalina unclasps the necklace and takes it from around her neck. ‘And I’m sure Kitty will be very, very gentle.’ She pauses. ‘Won’t you?’

There’s a little pause- and Cathy wonders if Kitty has exhausted her communicative powers for the day, maybe she isn’t even going to nod anymore. 

Then- ‘Yes’ Kitty replies, in a very tiny voice. 

She looks up into Catalina’s face for the first time and, when Catalina nods a Go Ahead nod, holds out a hand to gently stroke the tiny tigers little head.

‘Good girl.’ Catalina keeps hold of the chain, but holds it loosely so that Kitty can thoroughly investigate the silver charm with her own small fingers.

She turns it over and over, looks into the tiny face and mews experimentally and then gently strokes it with her forefinger like she’s petting a very tiny cat.

After a moment, she leans back and whispers something to Jane, who smiles and shakes her head.

‘I don’t know, darling. Why don’t you ask Catalina?’

Kitty’s voice is tinier than the tiger. ‘What’s it called?’

Catalina smiles at her. ‘She doesn’t have a name yet. I never thought to give her one.’

Cathy opens her mouth to correct her- it’s true Catalina never gave her tiger necklace a name herself but only because Cathy asked her the same question when she was around Kitty’s age.

She’s just about to tell Kitty that the tiger's name is Stripey, when Catalina gives her hand a quick, tiny squeeze, and she knows, just knows, somehow, without anyone saying anything, that she shouldn’t say a word.

‘What do you think would be a good name for her?’ 

Kitty hesitates for a moment, thinking hard. ‘Silver Kitty’ she says at last. Her voice is a tiny bit stronger.

Catalina nods decisively. ‘Then Silver Kitty she is.’

‘Give her back now, Kitty Kat’ Jane says, and Kitty reluctantly lets go.

‘What do we say to Catalina?’

‘Thank you.’

‘And thank you for the excellent name.’ Catalina says, scooping her hair out of the way to fasten the necklace back on.

Jane is smiling and blinking a bit too much. She sets Kitty back on her feet so that she can help Catalina fumble with the tiny clasp and Cathy catches her whisper.

‘-first time she’s- ever since- thank you so much-’

Catalina murmurs a quick ‘You’re welcome’ back, and then raises her voice slightly and says they should probably let the girls get started with the sleepover and Jane says yes, yes, she’s sorry to have held them up and would Catalina like to pop in for a cup of tea at her own house next door, and Catalina says yes, that would be lovely-

-and then Anne is pulling open the door wearing a new tshirt made of very shiny green fabric that is almost like scales and Catalina is giving her a last kiss goodbye and Anne is grabbing Cathy’s hand and pulling her inside, to where there is already music playing and the tempting smell of birthday cake.

[rhub4rb]

Me, Just me

Prologue 1 2 3 4 5 6

-_-_-_-

The silence at the dining table after Marinette had come clean to her parents was almost choking. Marinette couldn’t bring herself to look at her parents, instead focusing on the pattern on the tablecloth, dragging her finger along.

“For how long has this been going on, Marinette?” Asked Sabine. Marinette could tell she was trying to go for an encouraging tone, but there was a slight edge to it. An underlying, current of anger, hidden beneath the surface, that had Marinette shrinking in on herself.

“…A month.”

In a short, almost non-existent moment, the world seemed to still as the Dupain-Chengs took in the information that they had just been given.

A month where their daughter had been alienated. A month where she had felt completely alone. A month where she didn’t feel like she could go to her parents, because she believed her feelings was her responsibility.

And almost as soon as the world had stopped, it had started again, as Tom stood from his chair and enveloped his little girl in a tight hug, lifting her from her seat, and briefly, Marinette wondered if it was to comfort her or himself.

Marinette slept a little easier that night.

With the decision that Marinette would transfer school, being in class suddenly felt easier. Maybe it was the knowledge that it wouldn’t be like this forever that calmed her down. Or maybe, for the first time since this whole Lila mess started, Marinette looked at the situation from outside. She’d done what she could.

Marinette chose to speak with Master Fu about it that day too. She knew there was no way she could trust in Alya or Nino again, but she felt it would be wise to hear him about it before another Miraculous would be needed again.

For now, though, she would only look at her classmates and Lila with disinterest as she enjoyed her lunch alone.

 -

Master Fu’s place had always been rather relaxing.

That made sense though, what with it being a massage place and all. The green tea placed in her hands helped too.

“So, what is it you wish to discuss with me?” Master Fu asked.

Marinette looked hesitant. She wasn’t sure what Master Fu would think, she just knew she wanted him to approve of her choice.

“Master Fu, what- what would you do if people were being used,  and you warn them about it, but they won’t listen to you? If they turn against you and hurt you, because they think you’re wrong.” Marinette asked. “…would you stay and continue trying to help them, or would you remove yourself from the situation?”

Master Fu hummed in thought, Wayzz looking worriedly between his holder and Marinette.

“Selflessness versus selfishness. In an ideal world, the choice of being selfless would be best, but…” Master Fu looked at Marinette, her tense posture, her fiddling with her teacup. “It can burn you out, and if you hold a great responsibility, that could be dangerous. We are not meant to only think about others, but ourselves too.”

Marinette let out a sigh, visibly relaxing, and took a sip of her tea.

“May I ask what brought on the question?” Master Fu looked at her patiently  as she started to fiddle with her cup once more.

“I’m transferring to a new school… or that’s the goal at least.” Marinette looked down at her tea, seeing her reflection mirrored back at her. “Things haven’t really been going well and I… I’m just really unhappy, and frustrated and-” She let out an agitated sigh. “I was almost akumatized, and I don’t want to be risking it by being at a place with people that make me feel miserable.”

Master Fu and Wayzz shared a worried glance at the girl’s explanation. She was right, the risk of her becoming akumatized was not worth it in the situation.

“Then I believe you have made the right decision on the matter.” Master Fu said.

“Surely you aren’t alone.” Wayzz said, and Marinette knew that he was thinking about Nino.

“I’m not entirely sure…” She admitted. “There’s someone in my class who’s… aware of what’s happening, but I don’t think he knows the full extent of it.”

“Have you talked to him about it?” Master Fu asked.

“He believes that we shouldn’t do anything, let the situation solve itself but… it’s been a month and it’s only getting worse.” Master Fu nodded in understanding.

“That brings another issue though.” Marinette said, her eyes narrowed, calculating. “Rena Rouge and Carapace, I don’t think I can trust them in battle again.”

Master Fu hummed.

“I trust your decision, and if you believe that Rena Rouge and Carapace are unfit or untrustworthy, then we must find others to wield the Miraculous when the situation arises.”

Wayzz looked saddened by the information, and Marinette felt a little bad about it, but she knew that she couldn’t fight beside Alya and Nino again, especially if they trusted Lila over her.

“Would it be possible for us to do meditation?” Marinette asked. “I don’t know how long it will take for me to find a new school to attend, and while I’m calmer about the situation now, I’d like to have a few techniques, just in case…”

“Of course.” Master Fu said.  “That would probably be for the best. Come by every Wednesday and we can work on your meditation.”

After that, the invisible weight Marinette had been carrying felt a little lighter, if not just slightly.

 -

When Marinette came home, she looked at her room in thought.

There was a lot of pictures. And not just of Adrien.

Pictures of her and Alya, the class, Kitty Section. So many, and in all of them Marinette looked to be smiling. Now the pictures left a bitter taste in her mouth.

So Marinette started cleaning. She took down every picture, every note, every drawing that reminded her of why she felt so awful lately and put it all in a stack on her desk. She changed her computer desktop to a quote by Vincent Van Gogh, and then she took out a notebook and a pen.

“What’s the notebook for, Marinette?” Tikki asked.

Tikki had been as supportive of her holder as she could, especially after what happened with her near akumatization.

“It’s for letters, I want to try something.” Marinette said, as she climbed up and out to her balcony, Tikki following behind her.

Marinette sat down on her chair and looked out at the city as the sun was setting. She took a deep breath, opened her notebook, and started writing.

Word after word, Marinette started to feel lighter, addressing every single classmate, some letters only being half a page, and others, Marinette felt, went on page, after page, after page.

By the end of it, almost all of the notebook was full, and the sun had completely set.

“Do you think I made the right choice, Tikki?” Marinette’s voice cut through the quiet.

“I think you deserve as much happiness as everyone else Marinette, and if you have to change schools for that, then I think that’s the best decision you could make.” Tikki replied.

“Thank you, Tikki.” Marinette kissed her Kwami’s cheek before climbing back inside her room.

She still had so much to do before she could leave.

-_-_-_-_- 

@kaydenth3gayden @uninspired-writer @kuroko26

[naromoreau]

Dunkel AU: Late night delivery

Ok so I wrote this super self indulgent smut thing in the Dunkel AU cuz I had to go at Sharky even here. Yeah.

Tagging @deputyshitlordsantana (I couldn't have done it without your help!! ❤️) @deputyoneill @starsandskies @absurdwanderlust and @far-cry-all-the-time bc I used your girls!

----------------------

“Better luck next time, sweetcheeks,” Santana quipped, palming Becca’s ass while Lila plonked the entire Hurk vs. Roosevelt file on her desk. It fell with a thud. The fucking thing was huge.

“C’mon you guys! Two outta three?"

“Nah, babe. We’re out of here. Your lucky break is over,” Julie chimed in grabbing her perfectly tailored coat, “time to learn how to aim.”

Becca groaned, slouching on her chair. “I know how to aim, thank you very much,” she fretted at Julie, glaring at the dart board, “is that fancy Dunkel shit I can't tolerate-- makes me feel all weird.”

“Speaking of which,” Kat intervened grasping the half empty bottle of expensive bourbon, “it’d be a shame it goes to waste-”

“It’s not juice Kitty-Kat,” Daisy pointed out, scoffing, while grabbing her purse.

“Let the girl speak, Daze,” Santana said, slurring slightly, and falling on Becca's lap.

Kat cleared her throat. “As I was saying, it’d be a shame to see Pappy Van Winkle here go to waste so,” she drawled with the flash of a grin, “what if we finish this at the bar at the corner and have some more? Dunkel pays.” Katherine’s eyes glimmered. She pulled a black card out of her pocket and held it high, between middle and forefinger.

Becca’s second groan got lost in the hubbub.

Everyone readied, sauntering to the elevator door. Santana stood up not before planting her lips on Becca's, defty tongues all wet and hot.

“There, something for the night,” Santana said with a smirk, adjusting her skirt and waving her goodbye.

Fucking tease.

“Thank you very much, Miss Rossi,” Becca yelled from her desk, beckoning at them with a sour smile.

Slowly, the grin ebbed away. She opened the binder and fiddled with the papers, trying to find the letters in dire need to be corrected.

“Mister Dutch Roosevelt.”

Becca started typing, droning on the following paragraphs in her mind. By the time she finished twiddling with the kerning, her mind was in the gutter.

Fucking Santana and her ridiculously plump lips. The thought of certain incident involving both of them on a particularly crammed supply store room three weeks ago, sent a jolt of pleasure that landed between her thighs. She pressed her legs, sidestepping the need to moan. But really. The floor was deserted, and there was not a single soul who could catch her while going at it.

She bunched up her pencil skirt passed the suspenders of her garter belt and drew a shaky hand to her center. Soaked. She stood, still throwing concerned glances to her surroundings. Maneuvering expertly she unhooked her panties from the garter belt and got rid of them, flopping back on her chair.

She found quickly her clit, alternating between rolling it hard and fast and dipping in and out with idle strokes. Her free hand unbuttoned her silk blouse, yanking down her bra. The fabric bundled under her heavy breasts and she didn’t lose a second rolling her nipples with avid fingers. She was getting there, her walls clenching by reflex under a hard rub of her nub, and fucking Christ if only fucking Dunkel would be useful for once. Where was the man when she needed his dick?

She bit her lip in utter ecstasy and her eyelids fluttered open. Next thing she knew she hollered her lungs off.

A man was standing in front of her desk, cheeks flushed and slack jaw.

“Who the fuck are you!?”

Granted. It was a very disrespectful and gamely way of greeting a stranger. For the other hand, she’d been giving him a free show when the only thing he’d had to do was clear his throat. Cough. Anything.

“Uh, m-mailman, Miss,” he said while she tried to compose herself and arrange her scruffed attire.

“What? What happened to Beanie?”

“He uh, he’s going to college ‘cuz he’s all smart and shit, and-and this gig ain’t ‘nough for him anymore,” the stranger blabbered.

“And when on earth deliveries have been so late? Who let you in?”

He took off his blue cap, ruffling his hair. She arched a brow. He was quite handsome. Chestnut hair, grey eyes, really good looking. Her cunt throbbed and she gnawed the inside of her cheek.

“Yeah, sorry ‘bout that, I’ve been hella busy all day helpin’ my cousin movin’ in and y’know how those things are--” he said shrugging, “thought I could just-y’know flip this shit before the day died. They were real good downstairs.”

Becca’s heart galloped when her eyes fell to the front of his pants. A very noticeable bulge straining the blue fabric.

“I-I mean I’m sorry, ” he said, in an awkward slur, shuffling in his spot, “I’m--I’m just tryna make a few bucks ‘mkay? Didn’t wanna disrespect, I mean you gotta do, what you gotta do right?”

“What’s your name?” Her voice was almost hoarse as she made her way to him.

As predicted, his eyes took her all in. He gulped. “Name’s Sh-Sharky.”

“Well, Sharky,” she said taking a step closer, brushing his chest with her hard nipples, her breasts fairly screaming for attention, “I got a problem here.”

He looked down at her, parted lips and hooded eyes. “Yeah? Uh, wh-what’s that?”

“That your arrival was very inconvenient and now, I wonder, can you help me?” She tipped her head up, smiling at him.

“Buckled the fuck up and ready to hit it,” he outright blurted out, dropping his satchel and placing eager hands around her hips.

When she slithered her arms around his neck, he leaned closer trying to repress a wide dumb grin. She angled her head for a kiss and after a minute to sort noses and disposing of his cap, they kissed. He hummed. No, it was more a groan-like rumble that went straight to her cunt and she opened her mouth, allowing his tongue slide against her lips, coaxing a moan from her.

“Wait, wait,” she mumbled, pushing him slightly.

For a second he looked as a boy who was just told Christmas was cancelled. “What gives, shorty?”

“Relax, mailman, we’re gonna switch the party to that office, see?”

She signaled Dunkel’s office, with a big, comfy leather couch, just waiting for them to desecrate it. He allowed himself to be shepherded in, as she pulled him by the hand and pushed him on the couch.

Things went very frantic at speedlight. Soon there was a heap of haphazardly thrown clothes laying around. His cock was already throbbing between her thighs, as his fingers played with the fabric of her garter belt, the only piece of clothing he’d begged her to keep. “See uh, I’m more like a, a Mc’Donalds kinda guy y’know?, never thought my wheels could take me to uh, fancy dine-o-rama land, so I’d like to enjoy the full experience,” he’d said and she’d chuckled doing what he asked.

“Oh fuck, shit!” He bristled, suddenly, “You have any wraps? I’m-- I mean I wasn’t hoping to--” He blushed to his ears while she stood from his lap with a smirk.

“It’s ok boo, I got you.”

She fumbled through the stash of condoms, grunting when she found the box empty. Fucking horny bitches. She included.

“Oh fuck it,” she said, straddling him again, “I’m game if you are.”

His eyes blew wide open. “You sure?”

“Fuck yeah.”

He stroked his cock before pushing in, sliding easily into her. Her eyes screwed shut. Fuck. It was a very tight fit.

“Oh shit, shit!” He whimpered.

Becca whined, lust rendering her speechless. Then she gasped under a torturously slow roll of his hips, and threaded her fingers in his hair. She was desperate to start moving, bouncing on that mind-blowing pressure but he held her in place.

“Gotta go real slow, babe or I’ll bust in two secs,” he gruffed, taking a mouthful of her breast.

She nodded, arching into him and rocking gently as every nerve received the overload of sensations of his teasing tongue and dick.

He was brushing the edges of what she could take, every thrust more forceful than the last one. His groans and moans grew louder as she played her own tricks.

She lifted her ass, dropping down on him, giving a slow grind when his hips collided with hers, feeling his cock twitching inside her.

“Oh fuck, you feel amazing, shorty, so fucking tight,” he breathed on her lips, “makes me want to ask--”

“What?” She panted, through the hard pounding.

“Is this-fuck--a one time only thing?”

Becca kissed him, sucking his breath away. “I don't know, are you gonna keep delivering to this building?” She moaned while he pulled her down hard on his lap, angling his hips.

“Yeah.”

“Then I, oh shit, I think-- I think we can work something out. Now stop talking.”

There was a silly grin on his face at her words and he thrust with renewed efforts. The endline was just around the corner and when his thumb found her clit, she shattered into a tailspin of pleasure.

“Oh yesyesyes oh fuck, please!” There was a whimpered babble leaving her mouth as an electric volley wrecked her whole, the rolling waves expanding as she clenched around his cock.

She strove to ground again as he now slammed furiously, moaning in her neck. “Imma come-”

He intended to pull out but in the flick of a second Becca remembered the couch and the subsequent mess she would've to face if--

“Inside, come inside me.”

He groaned as he bottomed out, digging his fingers into her hips and spurted into her.

After a moment he kissed her again. It’d been a really productive night under her terms, but when she stood the reality cracked a little.

There was a big, soaked stain on the carpet just beneath the edge of the couch and on the furniture itself from when she finished just seconds ago.

Becca groaned for the third time that night.

“Oh fuck it,” she said, “this office should already be signed as biohazard as it is so...” She shrugged.

[i-breathe-therefore-i-read]

To All the Boys I've Loved Before Series by Jenny Han

To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before is the story of Lara Jean, who has never openly admitted her crushes, but instead wrote each boy a letter about how she felt, sealed it, and hid it in a box under her bed. But one day Lara Jean discovers that somehow her secret box of letters has been mailed, causing all her crushes from her past to confront her about the letters: her first kiss, the boy from summer camp, even her sister's ex-boyfriend, Josh. As she learns to deal with her past loves face to face, Lara Jean discovers that something good may come out of these letters after all.

*What I thought: 3.5 out of 5 stars

read: 6/19

Don't hate me but I thought this was just an alright book. I've read better contemporaries. Did I think it was cute? Yes, mostly. Did I find Lara Jean overreacted to everything? Yes, yes I did. She could have handle things so much better with Josh if she just was open about it like she was with Peter and their whole fake relationship. 

I like the family dynamics. I like how they banded together to help their family grow instead of stall because of the loss of their mother. I like how Lara Jean and her sisters are half Korean because hey that's me!

I liked the idea of Lara Jean's letters getting out but who puts the person's actual address in them!?! Things could have been avoided! But I must say it made things interesting that she did. lol

I really like the growth of Peter and Lara Jean’s relationship but I wanted more. The ending of the book was just blah to me. I don’t know....it could be because I watched the movie first and enjoyed it. The book didn’t live up to my exceptions of what people said about it. 

Lara Jean didn’t expect to really fall for Peter. She and Peter were just pretending. Except suddenly they weren’t. Now Lara Jean is more confused than ever. When another boy from her past returns to her life, Lara Jean’s feelings for him return too. Can a girl be in love with two boys at once?

*What I thought: 4 out of 5 stars

read: 6/19

I found this better than the first book but I think it was because I liked the love triangle in it. lol Peter who? I loved that a boy from a past love letter popped up. I felt more with them than I did with Peter and Lara Jean. Peter was kinda of a jerk in this one and I was rooting for Lara Jean to dump his butt. lol I was mad when she made her decision in the end but I can understand why. 

My favorite character was Stormy. She was a hoot. I’m only hoping I can be like her when I’m her age. lol

I still like the Covey family. They fight but they’re over it so quickly. Not my family, we hold grudges. lol 

I really like the idea of their tag game. It seems like such a fun thing to do!

Overall I thought it was a cute story. I felt that the story progressed more than the last book. Here's hoping the movie comes out soon.

Lara Jean is having the best senior year. And there’s still so much to look forward to: a class trip to New York City, prom with her boyfriend Peter, Beach Week after graduation, and her dad’s wedding to Ms. Rothschild. Then she’ll be off to college with Peter, at a school close enough for her to come home and bake chocolate chip cookies on the weekends. Life couldn’t be more perfect! At least, that’s what Lara Jean thinks . . . until she gets some unexpected news. Now the girl who dreads change must rethink all her plans—but when your heart and your head are saying two different things, which one should you listen to? 

*What I thought: 3 out of 5 stars

read: 6/19

Man I was somewhat disappointed in this book. Honestly the author should have just ended it with the second book. I mean there was cute moments but it did nothing for me.

Likes:

Lara Jean trying to find the perfect chocolate chip cookie recipe. I mean I liked how passionate she is towards baking.

Prom. I just loved that whole scene and what happened after prom. My heart exploded 

I love how their dad wants the girls to keep up with their Korean heritage

Genevieve who? So glad all that drama is gone.

I really appreciate Lara Jean and Chris’ friendship. They’re so different but they’re the best.

I liked that John Ambrose McClaren made an appearance. I still think he got cheated

Love the relationship between Lara Jean, Kitty, and Trina

Dislikes:

Why is Kitty written older than the 11 year old she really is? Don’t get me wrong, I love Kitty but she didn’t act like a kid her age is supposed to act. There was times I forgot she wasn’t the same age as Lara Jean because of the way she was written.

I really hate Margot. I didn’t like they way she treated Trina just because she wanted things to stay the same. Hello, you’ve been gone for 2 years! Things change. Also challenging your dad when it comes to your boyfriend. That was just wrong.

Lara Jean being so pushy when it comes to the wedding. Like it’s not your wedding? Ideas are appreciated but forcing your ideas onto people is not.

The whole drama when it came to going to different colleges. You know things could be solved without all the heartache with just talking. With how they handled all that, I don’t think they’ll make it through college together. Sad but true.

[plusultrabitchez]

Rooms on Fire Chapter 19: Engagement Party

*beep*beep*beep*

"Noooooo..." you groaned as you moved from your warm and cozy spot in Hitoshi's arms to hit the snooze button on your alarm. You had a long day ahead of you and you weren't quite ready for it. You and Hitoshi had been out very late last night for a mission you were both working on, and lucky Hitoshi got to sleep in. You, on the other hand, had plans to meet Ochako for brunch then help with a ton of wedding planning errands then help her get ready for her and Midoriya's engagement party later that evening.

It had been 2 months since you and Hitoshi made up and a lot had happened during that time. Hitoshi's career had blown up so he was working more than ever now and you two even got to work several missions together. He had also moved in. The two of you were surprised how natural it felt living together and combining your belongings. Cat was instant buds with Binx, Salem, and Hades. You and Hitoshi decided to get a larger bed since all three kitties and Hades liked to sleep with the two of you. However, Hitoshi wasn't the biggest fan of when he came home late from a mission and Hades was in his spot on the bed and refused to move. Trying to move a 90lb pitbull who kept wiggling out of his grasp without waking you was impossible. You kept reassuring Hitoshi that Hades would warm up to him eventually, but he had trouble believing you.

*beep*beep*beep*

"Shuuut uuup." you smacked your alarm clock again, but used too much strength and broke it. "Fucking shitbags." you grumbled crawling out from under the covers. Hitoshi was a deep sleeper and was still passed out. You looked over at him sleeping peacefully with Cat on his pillow snuggled in his hair and Salem crawling up to take the space your body occupied. "You lucky bastard." you said as you leaned down to kiss his cheek. A soft smile formed on his face even though he was still asleep. You were about to die of a cuteness overload. You got your phone and snapped a photo of sleeping smiling Hitoshi surrounded by purring cats. Your heart was so full of the love for them.

You went to the bathroom and turned on the shower. You loved the big tub your bathroom had, but you loved the shower just as much. It was roomy, covered in dark stone, and had several shower heads. After a few minutes, the whole bathroom was like a steam room because of how hot the shower was. You got undressed and climbed in letting out a satisfied sigh as the hot water rained down from the showerhead relaxed your sore muscles.

"Mind if I join you?"

You jumped as you heard Hitoshi's question causing him to laugh. "Sorry gorgeous I didn't mean to scare you."

"It's okay Tiger, and no I don't mind." You said turning around to look at him.

Hitoshi yawned and gave you a sleepy smile as he stepped into the shower. He winced when the water hit him. "Jesus, why is it so hot?"

"I like to practice burning in hell." You joked as you turned down the intensity of the water. Hitoshi laughed and joined you under the water giving you a hug and kissed your wet hair.

"Not that I mind, but what are you doing up so early? I thought for sure you would sleep in." You said as you got some shampoo and started to wash your hair.

"Didn't want to miss this view." he said looking you up and down and giving you a playful smack on the ass. You giggled and threw some suds at him. He chuckled and got to work washing his own hair. "Honestly, I got up because I have a hard time sleeping when you're not in bed with me."

This tugged your heartstrings. "Awww..." you gave him a quick peck on the lips and he rolled his eyes. "It's okay, same with me. When you're out late on missions I can only fall asleep if I take something." You said stepping under the water to rinse your hair. Hitoshi smirked and bit his lip as he watched the suds wash down your plump backside. He was suddenly splashed with more suds. "Enjoying the show tiger?"

Hitoshi chuckled. "Yeah, I really am. Thank you."

The two of you finished your shower and talked about the day ahead of you. While you were with Ochako, he would be with Midoriya and Iida helping them with groomsmen stuff. Hitoshi was the best man and you were the maid of honor so it was also up to Hitoshi to plan the Bachelor party and you the Bachelorette party. The two of you had come up with an amazing idea that you were going to reveal at the party later.

"How do you think they'll react?" You asked Hitoshi as you slipped on some black skinny jeans and a fitted black shirt.

"I think they're gonna freak out." Hitoshi replied while he sat back on the bed watching you get dressed.

"Good freak out or bad freak out?"

Hitoshi ran his fingers through his hair and smirked. "Depends on how tipsy they are."

You laughed. "That's fair." You walked over to Hitoshi and climbed into his lap to straddle him. "Are we crazy for doing this?"

Hitoshi brushed a strand of hair out of your face. "Oh yeah. We're fucking nuts for doing this."

The two of you laughed and exchanged sweet and playful kisses before you got up and put on your shoes.

"Okay Tiger, I'll see you at the party tonight."

Hitoshi waved lazily. "Bye gorgeous."

"Love you!" you called running down the stairs.

"Love you too!"

.

.

"I can't decide! Hydrangeas or Peonies?" You and Ochako were at the florist trying to decide on centerpieces.

"That depends on the color I think." You said as you sipped on your third large cold brew of the day. You guys had been at this for hours. The first stop you guys made after brunch was the venue to go over the linens and place settings, then you went to the place she was ordering invitations from to go over some changes, now you were here at the florist and had been for at least 2 hours. Ochako had changed her mind about six times on what type of flowers she wanted in the centerpieces.

"Well, the color scheme is white, blush, and gold, but I don't know if the pink peonies are too pink, but I don't want just plain white flowers." Ochako scratched her head in frustration.

"Let's just spray paint them gold and call it a day." You suggested in a monotone voice and chugged more coffee.

Ochako laughed, but you were dead serious. Usually, you were incredibly patient, but your lack of sleep and the headache that the overwhelming flowery smells was giving you was making you cranky. Your phone started ringing and you excused yourself to step outside.

"Oh my god, Toshiiiiiii..." You whined as you picked up.

"Wow, wedding errands going that well huh?" He laughed.

"Dude, I had no idea there were so many different tablecloth materials and I also don't get why they're that important. And don't get me started on the huge matte vs. gloss debate. Why the fuck does it matter if the letters on an invitation are sparkly or not?"

Hitoshi let out a hearty laugh as you ranted. "Wow, you do not like wedding planning huh?"

"It's.....not my thing." You chuckled. Hearing Hitoshi's voice was improving your mood tremendously.

"At least you have cake tasting to look forward too."

You huffed. "Not anymore. We had to reschedule to do that next week."

"Awww, I'm sorry. Look on the bright side, in a couple of hours you'll be able to see your incredibly handsome boyfriend all dressed up and may even be able to sneak off somewhere for a little alone time."

You laughed as you could hear the cocky smirk on Hitoshi's stupidly handsome face. "Some alone time huh? What are you hoping for a quickie in the bathroom or something?"

"I would not complain."

"Mmm can't say I would either." You both laughed. "So what's up baby?"

"Well, I wanted to give you a heads up."

You quirked your eyebrow. "Heads up about what?"

"Well, Midoriya just informed me that Bakugou will be at the party tonight."

"Ah....I see." You replied. There was a moment of silence. "Are....are you going to be okay with that?"

Hitoshi sighed. "Eh, judging by how our last conversation went, I don't think there will be any issues. We're not friends or anything, but we kinda came to an understanding and I think we can be civil."

You nodded even though Hitoshi couldn't see you.

"I know you wanted to talk to him and smooth things over, so tonight might be a good time for that." Hitoshi said. He wasn't thrilled about you being alone with Bakugou, but that was just because of his personal jealousy. He would put that aside since he trusted you 100%. The two of you did partner together for a long time so he had just accepted that you two would likely remain friends. As long as Bakugou didn't try any more shit, he would be fine.

"Yeah, I'll try to talk to him later tonight. I just don't want things to be weird between us since we all have the same friends. And, I mean, I did knock out several of his teeth last time I saw him."

This made Hitoshi crack up. "God I'm still bummed that I didn't get to see that."

You laughed. "Well if he ever tries shit again, I'll make sure you're around to see round two."

"You're the best girlfriend."

.

. Ochako and you were the first people to arrive at the restaurant. The party was going to be held on the rooftop bar overlooking the city. It was a beautiful clear night and the perfect temperature outside. You had set up a little table up front for gifts and to display pictures of Midoriya and Ochako throughout the years. You smiled looking at the pictures. They were so freaking cute together. You walked over to Ochako who was nibbling on some appetizers and gave her a big hug.

"Are you okay (Y/N)?" She asked. "Yeah, I am. I'm just so happy for you and I'm so thankful I get to be here on this journey with you." You both held each other for a moment and smiled. Upon releasing Ochako your fixed her hair and gave her a thumbs up. She was wearing her hair down and a long sky blue dress. She always looked so ethereal and you couldn't wait to go dress shopping with her. You knew she would be breathtaking in whatever dress she wore. You weren't feeling a dress so you decided to wear a gray suit with a black lace bustier and black heels. You felt way more comfortable in pants anyway. You wore your hair is soft waves and minimal makeup. Just a simple cat eye and basic contouring. (Reference photo: https://media.vanityfair.com/photos/5c0068301ceb5465bb016bf6/master/w_768,c_limit/Year-in-Suits-2018-SS02.jpg )

The two of you got some drinks while waiting for the boys and guests to arrive. Ochako got some Rosé and you got a Manhattan. "You look like a badass businesswoman." Ochako giggled. You chuckled. "That's what I was going for. Stone cold badass bitch." "You definitely achieved it." The two of you looked over to see Hitoshi, Iida, and Midoriya arriving on the rooftop. Iida was wearing a navy blue suit with a white shirt and navy tie. Midoriya was in a dark emerald green suit and tie with a black shirt, and those damn red shoes. Hitoshi was the only one to not wear a tie. He was wearing his black on black suit and it looked so good on him.

"Wow Ochako, you didn't tell me all these handsome fellas would be here." You said as you checked out Hitoshi and winked at him. Hitoshi smiled and gave you a sweet kiss. "God, you look so beautiful." He said quietly as he lightly caressed your cheek. "Thanks Tiger." You wrapped your free arm around his waist and took a sip of your drink. "You guys look great." "Thank you! The two of you look quite wonderful as well!" Iida said as he waved his arms around. Midoriya walked up and gave Ochako a hug and a kiss. "You look so pretty Ochako." Ochako blushed and giggled. "Thanks Deku."

"Kubo, I applauded your suit. It's quite unconventional, but an interesting choice." You smiled. "Thanks Iida." You walked up to him and straightened his tie which was disrupted with all his gestures and pinched his cheek. "You look sharp!" A light pink dusting appeared on his cheeks and he cleared his throat. "Um thank you Kubo." Hitoshi laughed at his friend's reaction to your compliment.

After about 20 minutes guests started to arrive. Most of class 1-A was there, along with other friends, and of course Ochako's parents and Midoriya's mom. All Might was unfortunately out of town and unable to make it.

You and Hitoshi were chatting with Mina and Kaminari when you saw Kirishima and Bakugou arrive out of the corner of your eye. Kirishima waved enthusiastically as he hurried over to say hey. You made eye contact with Bakugou for a split second before he looked down at the floor and made a B line for the bar. You furrowed your brow and looked up at Hitoshi who noticed what happened. "I think it may be time for that talk." You said quietly. Hitoshi nodded. "Yeah, go ahead (Y/N)." "Now, are you sure you're alright with this?" You asked. Hitoshi kissed your forehead. "Yeah gorgeous, I am. You go smooth things over and let me know if you need anything." You smiled and gave Hitoshi a kiss. "Thanks for being so awesome. I love you." He smiled sweetly at you. "I love you too."

You made your way over to the bar and walked up next to Bakugou who was staring at his drink. "Can I have another Manhattan please?" The bartender got to work making your drink and you leaned against the bar and faced Bakugou. "Hey there." He looked at you out of the corner of his eye and grunted in response. You chuckled and ordered two shots of Tequila. You nudged one over to Bakugou, but he didn't take it. "Come oooonn. You know you want tooooo." You said in a sing-song voice. Bakugou fought the smirk that was creeping onto his face. You put your arm on his shoulder. "All the cool kids are doing it." He chuckled and blushed. "Ah! There he is!" You cheered. You clinked your shot glasses together and took the shots. You picked up your drink and tugged on his sleeve. "Come on." "What?" Bakugou gave you an apprehensive look which made you chuckle. "Don't worry, I just want to talk to you for a minute. I promise I won't punch you." He smirked. "Alright fine."

You led him over to the edge of the roof that was devoid of people. You both leaned up against the railing and looked out overlooked the city. You took a deep breath and opened your mouth to speak. "I'm sorry (Y/N)." You looked at him in shock. He looked back at you, not with his normal scowl, but with genuine guilt and remorse. It was jarring, to say the least. "I was an asshole. I had my head up my own ass when I told him all those things about us." "Holy shit. Is this the real Katsuki? Apologizing?" "I was just so...angry and....jealous." You sighed heavily. "Why though? Katsuki, you're the one that ended things between us." You said softly. You weren't mad, you just wanted to get to the bottom of things. Bakugou pinched the bridge of his nose then threw back his drink. "Because I..." he gulped and then looked you in the eye. "I care about you (Y/N)." "Like 'I hope you don't die' care or like 'have my babies' care?" You were defaulting to humor because you did not know how to handle this. " 'I wish I was him' care..." He said quietly. You took a deep breath and threw your own drink back. "Fuck dude. Is that why you called it off?" He nodded. You were both silent for a moment.

"I also realize you were right." You quirked your eyebrow at him. "At the party. You said if I actually cared about you I would let you be happy. You were right. That's why I swallowed my stupid fucking pride and told mind fuck the truth." "Thank you. For doing that." He huffed and looked away. You put your hand on his cheek and turned him to look at you. He was clearly angry with himself and if you knew Katsuki, he was beating himself up worse than anyone else ever could. "Seriously Katsuki. Thank you." You traced his cheekbone with your thumb. He closed his eyes and unclenched his jaw slightly relaxing. You always managed to calm him down.

"That's why I wanted to talk to you. I wanted to tell you that I forgive you and to thank you for coming clean to Hitoshi. I know that wasn't something that was easy for you and it means a lot." He nodded and mumbled a "you're welcome" as he was melting into your hand. He allowed himself to savor the feeling of being close with you again before placing his own hand over yours and slowly pulled it away from his face and held it gently. "So do you want me to stay away from you two now?" He asked as he gently ran his thumb back and forth on your knuckles. You chuckled. "No. I actually wanted to see if we could still be friends." Bakugou looked up at you surprised. "If you want to that is! I know it may be awkward, but I mean..." you trailed off knowing he would get what you were saying.

He nodded over to Hitoshi who was chatting away with Kirishima and Kaminari. "What does he say about all this? Is he going to punch me again?" You chuckled. "Don't worry about Hitoshi. We talked about it and he's cool with it." Bakugou scoffed. "I don't buy it." "Katsuki, he knows you're important to me." Bakugou's expression softened. "I mean, come on. We've known each other for a long time, we partnered for almost 2 years, yeah we fucked a lot, but you also saved my ass in battle more times than I can count and vice versa."

He furrowed his brows. "Hey! You never had to save me! I-." You placed your finger over his mouth. "The Fujita bust." He was quiet before huffing. "Okay...one time." You cracked up laughing. Seeing you laugh made him smile and chuckle a bit. He realized he was still holding your hand and sighed before he let go. "So we're cool?" He asked. "One more thing." Bakugou rolled his eyes and groaned. "God woman, you fucking talk a lot." "Shut up. You love it. And I know what's going through your head and I can't let it keep up." He quirked his eyebrow. He both hated and loved how you instinctively knew what was going on in his head. It was great in battle and theoretically great in a relationship if he didn't pussy out. "I don't regret what happened between us." "Really?" He asked quietly. He felt like a weight lifted off of him. "Yeah. I mean I had fun, didn't you?" He smirked as he looked you up and down. "A lot of fun babe." You laughed and punched his shoulder. "Honestly Katsuki, I think you were what I needed at the time. You were, and are, a great friend and you were a great lay." Bakugou got cocky. "Better than mind fuck?" You laughed and shook your head. "Sorry babe. You were amazing don't get me wrong, but he does this thing with his tongue and fingers that just makes me-" Bakugo laughed and shoved you gently. "Shut the fuck up I don't wanna hear that." "Well then you shouldn't have asked." You both laughed and smiled at each other. "So are we good now?" You asked. "Yeah. We're good." You gave each other a hug and held each other for a moment before letting go.

"Your ass looks great in those pants by the way." He said into your ear.

"Aaaannnd there he is. If you keep that shit up, Hitoshi and I will take turns punching you."

"Bakugou chuckled. "That's fair. But just let me know if he is ever up for sharing because I could make that work." "Ooooh yeah, I uh-yeah no, that'll never happen."

You and Bakugou rejoined the group and you assured Hitoshi that everything went fine and would fill him in on the details once you got home. The party went on, a bunch of sweet speeches were made and people started to trickle out. You told Midoriya and Ochako to tell everyone who was invited to the Bachelor/Bachelorette party to stay behind for a special announcement.

The Bachelor party consisted of Midoriya, Hitoshi, Iida, Kirishima, Sero, Kaminari, and Bakugou.

The Bachelorette party consisted of Ochako, you, Mina, Tsu, Yaoyorozu, and Jirou.

Hagakure and Ojiro couldn't make it since they would be on their honeymoon during that time.

You clinked your glass to get everyone's attention as you kicked your heels off and climbed onto a chair so everyone could see you. Everyone laughed at your struggle.

"Alright, so everyone knows that I'm the maid of honor and Hitoshi here is the best man. Normally the Bachelor and Bachelorette parties are separate so the dudes can look at tits and the chicks can look at dicks and no one feels bad."

Everyone laughed and cheered.

"But we're all pretty comfortable with each other and the idea that Toshi and I came up with was too good so we're combining the parties."

Everyone murmured in confusion as Hitoshi and you smirked.

"I know what you're thinking: That won't be any fun. I won't be able to let loose. Bullshit! We'll have our own events, but we can party and celebrate and tear up the town."

You paused and took a sip of your drink. "And that town.......is VEGAAAAASSSS!!!"

Everyone erupted with cheers and "Hell yeahs" and fist pumped.

"We're taking all you bitches to an all expenses paid 5-day vacation to Las Vegas and we're going to have an awesome time."

Everyone spent the next few minutes cheering and thanking you and Hitoshi for such an awesome trip. You then split off into two groups, the guys and the gals so you could go over travel info and your separate events. As you walked by the guy's table to join the girls Midoriya stopped you.

"Umm Kubo, what are you girls going to be doing?" He asked nervously. All the guys looked at you curiously including Hitoshi. You hadn't revealed to each other the separate events. You smiled sweetly. "Oh yeah, just a bunch of spa days and a yoga retreat where we can talk about our changing bodies."

"Oh wow, okay that sounds nice." Midoriya looked relieved whereas the rest of the guys, fully aware of your mischievous tendencies, looked confused.

You laughed evilly and gave Midoriya a devious smile before smacking him over the head. "No Midoriya! I'm going to take her out to party at clubs, I got her pole dancing classes, you're welcome by the way, then I'm taking her to Thunder from Down Under to get a bunch of giant Australian dicks shoved in her face."

Midoriya went white as a ghost while the rest of the guys were wheezing with laughter. You put your hand on Midoriya's shoulder and smiled. "I'm going to ruin her Midoriya."

Hitoshi realized something and immediately stopped laughing. "Wait, you're taking her to the Thunder from Down Under so that means you're also going to also have giant Australian dicks shoved in your face."

You gave Hitoshi a sweet and innocent look. "Yesssssss."

"(Y/N)!" Hitoshi said in a "what the fuck" tone.

You turned around quickly and ran to join the girls. "SORRY SWEETIE! LOVE YOUUUUU!"

The guys were now laughing at Hitoshi who eventually started laughing too and shook his head.

"God she's a spitfire isn't she?" Kirishima chuckled as he slapped Hitoshi on the back.

Hitoshi smiled as he watched you from across the room. "Yup. I wouldn't have her any other way."

[aswithasunbeam]

Hey! I love your fics soo(get it Soo) much! Could you please make a fluffy A Winter's Ball/a night in Morristown Hamliza fic?I'd really appreciate it.

Ha! I love that! And I’d love to do more fluffy Morristown stories!! They’re one of my favorite things to write! I actually wrote a really long piece set in Morristown over on my AO3 account, which you might not have seen as I haven’t cross-posted here on tumblr. It’s called “A Winter’s Romance” and the overall vib is pretty fluffy, though there is some angst thrown in for good measure :)

Here’s a link and an except from the first chapter, if you’re interested!

[Read on AO3]

February 1780

“Is this your shirt?” Tilghman asked, digging through a pile of clothes that had yet to be laundered. His jacket had been discarded, his breeches were half undone and the shirt he had on had been untucked. All in all, he looked like a disheveled mess, which was unfortunate, as the dancing assembly was to start in less than an hour’s time.

Hamilton looked over at the bright white linen in Tilghman’s hands and shook his head. Not only was the shirt too large for him, but his clothes had all been mended and washed too many times to look that white. “Must be Mac’s,” he suggested as he yanked fresh breeches over his hips.

Tilghman frowned, looking around the room with an intensely puzzled expression. “What’s happened to all my shirts?”

Hamilton tried to stifle a laugh. “Would you like to borrow one of mine?”

“Yours would make me look like a chubby giant,” Tilghman refused.

Hamilton did laugh this time. “Just wear the one you have on, then.”

“This one smells.”

“Well, I don’t know how to help you,” Hamilton said with amusement as he pulled on his uniform jacket. He ran his hand over his chin and considered shaving again.

“I want to look my best. Do you know who just arrived in town today?” Tilghman’s eyes lit up with excitement. Hamilton shook his head, and his friend continued, “General Schuyler’s daughter, Elizabeth. We met some time ago when I was negotiating with the Six Nations. She’s twenty-two, now, and still unattached. She’s supposedly visiting her aunt, Doctor Cochran’s wife, but it’s obvious she’s on the hunt for a husband.”

Elizabeth Schuyler. The name conjured the image of striking black eyes and a warm smile. He’d met the young lady some time ago when he was in Albany trying to pry troops loose from the greedy hands of General Gates. General Schuyler had invited him to dine, although most of his family was away. Elizabeth had been at home, however, and she had more than upheld the Schuyler reputation for hospitality. He didn’t remember the conversation exactly, but he remembered laughing a great deal.

“And you’re hoping to oblige her in her quest?” Hamilton asked. Tilghman had just turned thirty-five that Christmas, so there was something of an age difference, but he doubted it would prove much of an obstacle if the girl was willing.

“She’s a lovely young woman,” Tilghman replied diplomatically. Hamilton took that to be a firm yes. “She’s traveling with Catharine Livingston. Aren’t you acquainted with her family?”  

Kitty Livingston’s name hit him like a swift kick to the abdomen. He’d been utterly infatuated with the beautiful heiress when he’d boarded with her family before he’d started at King’s. He’d gone so far as to write her a love letter. She’d rejected him in no uncertain terms. He was still trying to disentangle himself from Cornelia Lott after his disastrous meeting with her father. The prospect of a night with both Cornelia and Kitty made him feel vaguely ill.

“Ham?” Tilghman prompted.

“Hm?” He hummed, pulled from his thoughts. “Oh, yes. I’m very well acquainted with the Livingstons.”

“You wouldn’t mind entertaining Miss Livingston a bit, would you? Just so I might have the chance to speak with Miss Schuyler alone?”

Hamilton met his friend’s hopeful eyes and found himself nodding. What was a bit more humiliation and misery, after all, if it might bring his friend happiness?

~*~

Lively music and a roaring fire greeted Hamilton and Tilghman as they entered the hall where the dancing assembly was held. A table was set up in the corner with what passed for a feast in these conditions: two pots of stew, assorted root vegetables, and a very meager chicken that had already been almost entirely consumed.

“Colonel Hamilton,” Cornelia’s high voice came from just behind him.

He turned and saw that she had been waiting by the door. “Miss Lott,” he replied, bending low and pressing a kiss to her outstretched hand. “You’re looking well.”

“Oh, I’m very well, Colonel.” She gave him a tiny, hopeful smile. “I hope you are, also. I’ve missed seeing you the past few weeks.”

“I’ve been…very busy,” he said vaguely.

She nodded rapidly, clinging on to the excuse like a lifeline. “I thought you must be.”

An awkward pause followed as he searched for something to say. He didn’t want to raise her hopes, and he was still too embarrassed and stung to tell her about his humiliating meeting with her father. And what good would telling her do anyway, he thought; knowing would only cause a rift between her and her father. As he was standing there staring at her, the band struck up a new song.

“Would you like to dance, Colonel?”

“I…” He hesitated. If he danced with her, she’d think there was still hope for them. The only way forward he could see was to break her heart. Being cruel now would be kinder in the end, he told himself. “No, Miss Lott.”

Her whole face fell. She blinked at him, as if waiting for him to take it back, or to explain.

“I’m sorry,” he told her. Then he turned away.

He felt like a monster.

He spotted Tilghman, McHenry, Webb, and Richard Meade standing in a group near the food and he made his way towards them. Mac slapped him on the back companionably when he stopped beside him. Tilghman shook his head. “Poor Polly. Looks as though you’ve just torn her heart out.”

He refused to look back. Plastering the same fake smile he’d been wearing more and more of late, he said, “You know how it goes.”

“Onwards to the next conquest,” Webb laughed.

“That chicken didn’t make for much of a feast,” Hamilton commented, desperate to change to subject. The conversation mercifully turned to dreams of feasts after the war.

Tilghman tugged at his sleeve a few minutes later.

“Mrs. Washington is done speaking with Miss Schuyler and Miss Livingston,” Tilghman whispered, his eyes focused somewhere to the left. Hamilton followed his gaze and saw the two young ladies were standing by the fireplace, speaking quietly to each other.

Hamilton nodded for his friend to go first, and followed a pace behind as they made their way to the girls.

“Miss Schuyler, how wonderful to see you again,” Tilghman proclaimed as they approached.

“Colonel Tilghman,” Miss Schuyler greeted him warmly. “I did not know I’d be graced with your company tonight.”

Tilghman bent low to kiss her hand.

“Might I present Colonel Hamilton? He’s a dear friend of mine,” Tilghman added, gesturing back to him without turning around.

“I had the pleasure of meeting Miss Schuyler when I dined with her family in Albany,” he stated, bowing and kissing her hand as well. When he stood, he found her dark eyes scrutinizing his face. He smiled tightly at her, sure she didn’t remember the meeting. She must have dined with the whole Continental Army by this point, with Philip Schuyler for a father.

He turned his attention to Kitty. “Miss Livingston,” he greeted, bowing to her this time. He then introduced Tilghman, who repeated the ritual.  

“Did you have a pleasant journey?” Tilghman asked, his eyes glued to Miss Schuyler.

Hamilton turned his attention to Kitty. “It’s been quite a while since we’ve last spoken.”

Kitty nodded, her eyes tracking over his uniform and lingering on his rank insignia. “You’ve done well for yourself since then, Hammy,” she noted, smiling warmly at him. “I’m very glad to see it.”

He thanked her softly. Glancing to the side, he saw Tilghman had fully engaged with Miss Schuyler in conversation about her travels from Albany. He smiled and held out a hand to Kitty. “Would you care to dance, Miss Livingston?”

“It would be my pleasure, Colonel,” she agreed. As he lead her towards the dance floor, she leaned in to him and added, “I see Colonel Tilghman has wasted no time in staking a claim for my dear Betsey.”  

They shared a smile as they positioned themselves to join the dance.

~*~

His breath created a great puff of white smoke in the frigid air as he leaned against the porch rail. The music from inside was still audible, but dulled by the closed front door. There were torches glowing along the walkway that provided fairly good light, but hardly any warmth. Still, a moment of solitude was well worth braving the bitter cold.

Miss Livingston had quickly found dancing partners, lovely and eligible as she was. Cornelia seemed to have departed the party shortly after their talk. Tilghman was happily monopolizing Miss Schuyler. Everyone inside seemed paired off and content, leaving him free to slip outside.

He missed John. He missed having a dear, loyal companion, someone with whom he could talk and laugh. Someone to drive away his darkest thoughts on these cold, lonely nights.

He may as well get used to being alone, he thought harshly. No man was ever going to consent to having him for a son-in-law. Cornelia’s broken heart would be a warning to him to never attempt to love again.

The music swelled suddenly, then dulled again with the sound of the front door closing. He turned to see Elizabeth Schuyler stepping out onto the front porch. She smiled at him.

“Are you well, Colonel? I saw you stepping outside, and I was concerned.”

He forced another smile. “Quite well, thank you. I was just a bit warm from dancing.”

She nodded, then stepped closer to him, leaning against the rail as well.

“It’s a beautiful night,” she commented mildly, her face turned up towards the sky.

He followed her gaze, looking up at the nearly full moon and the bright stars dotting the dark winter sky. “Yes, it is,” he agreed. “Though it is terribly cold.”

She laughed. “I’m from Albany. I’m quite used to the cold.”

“I wish I were,” he replied.

“I suppose you never had to deal with these kinds of conditions in the Caribbean.”

He nodded, then his brow furrowed. “Did you recognize my accent?”

“No,” she said simply. She glanced over at him and smiled again. The expression made her eyes sparkle, he noticed. “You mentioned you were from Saint Croix when you dined with my family in Albany.”

He cocked his head to the side, surprised. “I didn’t think you remembered.”

“Of course I do.”

“It’s just, I know you must have dinner with officers all the time,” he tried to explain, hoping she didn’t think he accusing her of being rude or ill-mannered.

“That is true,” she laughed. “But you made an impression.”

He laughed as well. “Is that a compliment or an insult?”

She gave him a considering look. “I suppose we’ll find out,” she said coyly.

He grinned and nodded.

A companionable silence followed, their attention turning back to the still winter night.

“Did you really come out here because you were warm from dancing?” she asked suddenly.

He looked back at her, and found he wanted to answer honestly. “No. I’ve been feeling a little low of late. And, due to some unfortunate circumstances, I had to hurt someone’s feelings tonight. I suppose I’m simply not in the merry-making spirit.”

Her expression was compassionate. She reached out a hand tentatively, laying it lightly on his upper arm. “I saw you standing out here from the window,” she told him. “You looked…lonely.”

“So you came to keep me company?” he asked.

She nodded as she removed her hand. “You can tell me if I’m intruding.”

He shook his head. “I’m enjoying your company,” he assured her.

She smiled again. A moment of silence followed, before she began to speak again, easily changing topics. “I was speaking to Mrs. Washington earlier. She was telling me about her work with the sick and wounded soldiers, and she promised to take me with her on one of her visits. I do hope I can make myself useful while I’m here.”

“I’m sure the men would appreciate your assistance,” he told her sincerely.

“Is there anything else I could do to help? Mrs. Washington told me you would know best what needed doing.”

He felt a flicker of pride at the compliment from the dear old lady. Considering a moment, he asked, “Can you knit? Sew?”

She nodded.

“We always need hats, mittens, scarfs and the like. And many of the men have clothes that need mending. That would certainly be a help.”

Her eyes dropped to his hands gripping at the railing. “Do you have any mittens, Colonel?”

He looked down at his chapped hands and shook his head. “I had a pair, but they wore out last winter. I haven’t had the chance to replace them.”

“I’ll knit you a pair first,” she said decisively. “From what I’ve heard, your pen is our country’s best hope of winning this war. Whatever would we do if you developed frost bite?”

“I’d be most obliged to you, Miss Schuyler.”

“Speaking of frost bite, I think perhaps we should go back inside,” she suggested. She chuckled as she looked at him. “Your nose has turned bright red with cold.”

He nodded. She turned and pulled open the front door, light and music pouring out. Looking back at him, she made a little motion with her head to urge him on. As he followed her inside, he felt a smile stretching his face again. A real smile.

Well, he thought, that was just…so inconvenient.

[sincerely-yours-always]

Diary thoughts:

Seeing her name in your most recent reposts makes me laugh and cry at the same time. Why you keep the act up, and why I still follow you just to see the same things over again are the same question....

I don’t want it if I can never tell when you’re telling the truth or lying anymore. If I have to beg you to leave someone alone. If I’m constantly finding new ways you keep her in your world. And why if you want her in it so badly, why you wouldn’t just leave me alone ?

You don’t understand why it hurts me. Why, when I see she follows “my” playlist, the one you had made for me, and listens to it and thinks of you... how would that not feel like a knife in my back? Out of everyone in the whole world and out of all your playlists, why wouldn’t it bother me that it’s her listening to that one? Why out of everyone in the whole world was it her reposting your dd/lg and love posts? Why out of everyone she felt comfortable enough to take your hoodie home and wear it? That photos of you are still on her profiles when you so strongly didn’t want me to post or tag you on my own.

You were in my house, I was lying on your chest. You were snapping someone named kat and hiding your phone from me. You later tried to explain it was your friends gf, and it was private and just didn’t want me involved in their personal stuff. When all the photos and everything came out, you know what crushed me? That I didn’t know if I could believe you anymore. The thought of you flirting with kitty over snap while I laid on your chest a few inches from you... and then lying to me. How do I know what’s true or not? When you’ve admitted to hiding certain things from me, and lying the past few months... when you told me nothing had happened between you two before I saw that photo of you two kissing. When you told me you’d blocked her, to rediscover you guys following each other again several times... or more tumblr pages and reposts. The sight of that photo, all photos of you two... gave me this sick turning feeling in my stomach. Like I was stuck on a park ride nightmare and it wouldn’t let me off.

You act like regaining trust is my duty alone. Like i need to ignore all previous behavior and write it off as the past / you guys don’t talk anymore. But it’s not. It’s not my duty alone. You don’t like the thought of me trusting you. But how am I supposed to rebuild trust alone? How can I believe someone who keeps saying one thing, but actions don’t seem to line up? When if she really doesn’t mean anything to you and you don’t talk, why it seems so hard to not involve her in your life anymore?

You say that you didn’t leave me for another girl, that you left. For the 3 months before you left, I tried harder than I ever did in my life. I worked so hard on myself and to prove that I loved you and that I was seriously trying to come over... and in my mind, we were still trying? Still dating/daddy-baby girl? Still in love and trying to make it work? But you were on tinder and drunk making out with this girl and going on museum dates and who knows what else... and you don’t call it cheating because you didn’t believe that I was trying to come back and kept repeating we weren’t officially dating again until I came back. But to me? I was trying so fucking hard and you were kissing that girl and lying to me and who knows how much else you don’t tell me until I find it myself... and to me, you betrayed my trust. I sent you cute birthday gifts and so much money and tried to help you so much and that whole time... that whole time, you were playing me. You were out partying and getting drunk and doing whatever you did with this girl, and then got mad when I started asking questions. And I can imagine you getting mad now, if I tell you myself that I felt cheated, you would get mad and make me feel guilty for leaving countries and “leading you on” by dating you for so long (like doing long distance didn’t hurt/cost me too, and like you were the only one going through it, or like you didn’t try to break up with me like 10 times) and like somehow in this whole scenario... I’m the bad guy. All I did was love you with my whole heart and try to be honest with you in the throes of so much complicated life shit?!? For me - in those last few months- you broke my trust, my heart, the idea I had of you in my head. The thought that you were honest and loyal and were trying hard with me to be “team we”. You were Daddy. Mine only. And suddenly my mind was opened to the possibility and reality that you weren’t just my Daddy anymore. That you could and would be a daddy to other girls, maybe even this kitty girl. Because how do I know anything you’ve ever told me to be true, except for the fact that I wanted to believe you were true and honest and good? The fact that you still have her on snap and have hung out with her enough to give her your Spotify ... like what, was she in your car? Were you giving her a ride and she heard your music and liked it? Have you seen her more often than you’ve led me to believe?

How do I know anything or trust anything, Daddy? Why would you come back and say we should try again, when the one who stopped trying was you? Are you going to change your mind in 2 days time? Are you going to leave me again when you’re tired of committing to me? Or see her or others casually without telling me again? Are you ever going to have her actually blocked from you completely? Or would I still be begging you a year, 2 years from now? How can I love you so much and be so angry at you for lying to me like that?!? For pushing me to utter vulnerability and honesty when you couldn’t even do that about this girl? You had pushed me to the point I was willing to buy a plane ticket for the next week just to prove my love and commitment to you, and you... were doing.... I wouldn’t know what you were doing because you stopped talking to me. You want me to forgive and forget because “we all have our own demons and weaknesses”, because “you’re human”, because “you’re lonely”? I WAS LONELY. All I wanted was you!! I begged you in that letter, I would try calling, I would send gifts, I felt so lonely with you. How is it that you said you loved me so much and made me feel so fucking alone? Why would I send money and gifts and cards and letters, why would I send photos and call everyday if I wasn’t trying? Why was I blamed for everything? For getting mad about this girl and looking for things online, for getting mad about you not replying for 48hours... I sent flowers to your mom after your grandmas funeral. You made me cry in the bathtub on my own birthday. For leading you on? When I’ve been through my own trauma and shit and didn’t know what to do or how to come back to you without my family’s approval... and you bullied me. You refused to give me love or support, or get rid of kat’s photos until I had a flight date for you, and you made me feel guilty about not knowing. Like I didn’t love you enough, like I had kept you from fucking other girls and living your life. Like loving me was a boring duty that you were stuck with. You came to visit me on this trip I was so excited for, and all of a sudden you had this huge ultimatum that sucked the life out of me for the second half of your visit. All I had wanted was to be with you and hold you and hug you and cry and laugh and not think about how hard life was for a while... and it was every second day that you were asking me about when I was coming back and if I didn’t have a flight date, we were breaking up, and I didn’t know what to do. My anxiety went through the roof at the thought of losing you and I couldn’t think straight, how is anyone (let alone someone struggling with mental health) supposed to make a big life decision under that pressure in that time crunch?!? Like here, try and enjoy this time with this person but also make a quick decision which could result in you losing your family or losing the love of your life?! All I was asking for was some time to process, that I would still try, that the answer was no for now but you went home and what, rejoined tinder immediately and said yes to go hang out / go on a date with kat?

I’m crying so hard my eyes hurt. You may not understand why this girl is such a big deal to me but she is. I am not, NOT NOT not nOT going to do it. If she is still around and still has feels for you and you remain in contact with her through any means, I’m not doing to get involved with you again. And that’s big for me to say. Because I’ve repeatedly called you the love of my life... I don’t think you’ve ever called me that. But not even the love of my life is worth my mental health and I’ve worked fucking hard to get myself to this point, to where I can say that. I think this is what a boundary sounds like. You worry about our ddlg dynamics and trust not being the same... I’m telling you it won’t be if my boundaries aren’t respected. What’s in the past does not stay in the past. It affects me, still today. Your actions may be in the past but those consequences still continue to hurt me. And I’m not getting mixed up in some is it love - is it boredom triangle. My boundary is that she goes or I go. You guys have history and she wants you, and what you’ve allowed to happen between the two of you had hurt me. To deny that or ask me to dismiss it without acknowledging the hurt you’ve caused... well. I’ve said what I’ve said. I can’t trust someone enough to be little and vulnerable and safe with them, if I’m constantly unsure if I’m the only one / made to feel like she’s still in your life. You want me to trust you, I want to trust you. I’ve said before that I would gladly delete old flames if it made you feel like I was being reciprocal, and I will. But if I’m considering this yes and want to try and make it work with you, “team we”, she’s gone. Blocked. Idc if it’s Spotify, snap, tumblr, TikTok, a phone call, Facebook, insta, youtube, email, a group chat, messenger... I want to know you respect me, my feelings, my mental health, my heart, my loyalty and my boundary. Help me rebuild my trust not just with words but with actions, and I’ll do the same. I’m doing hard work with a lot of emotions/mental health/relationships issues on my own time and will continue to do the work and be a better me. But I cannot get over the breach of trust / this girl / you leaving without your help.

(And yes, I know this is not in light of being your partner. But, like, you were the one that made it that way? You dumped me, left me in the lurch to go explore and do whatever you wanted to do, and have now come back to say you miss / want me again — and I’m feeling a lot of anger I didn’t allow myself to feel initially. I’m kind. I’m gentle. I’m sharp and sarcastic. I’m smart. I’m quick on my feet. I’m pretty. I’m a great friend. I’m soft. I cry in movies and around dogs. I am.... so so much. And the way you made me feel so unwanted and shitty and replaceable, I will never forget. You were... you were my anchor. And I felt I was yours. Until you got tired of this anchor and cut them off as dead weight... because, in your eyes, it seemed right for the anchor and the boat. So the boat could go sailing and meet other boats and be free, but what is an anchor without a boat exactly? You did what you wanted and what you thought was right for you. Not me. Because what I was asking for - reciprocal energy, attention, support, answers, a call back..: you couldn’t give me. And so you did what was right for you, the sail boat, to do. You cut ties and left. And then you got an anchor tattoo after dumping me? Or was it before. I don’t even remember time that well anymore. I think it was after. No yeah, it was after. Like here is this little momento I’ll remember you by as I move on and leave you behind, little anchor. I cried for a whole week after you showed me. Like here, I’ve left you but look at how much you meant to me and how much we could be, but I’m leaving you and don’t want you, but maybe someday I will?? I couldn’t even say your name. I just cried daddyy... like somehow you would magically hear me and remember me. The way I grieved for you someone would have thought you died. I couldn’t eat or sleep, I would cry at random moments and I could barely leave my bed. I wouldn’t let anyone touch my ring or try to take it off, I’d just lay there curled up, rocking back and forth and grasping at the ring on my finger. I am keenly aware that I haven’t been your partner for a fucking long time... because just when I thought we were close or still trying, you’d remind me. Too little too late. You don’t have a flight date. I’m lonely and human and you can’t be jealous. I don’t love you the same way you love me and I’m sorry. The end.)

((These tumblr reposts simply cannot allllll be old posts. Like I asked you to block her at least 2-3 months ago at the minimum, I don’t think repost queues are that long. Not looking for a fight on that but it has been your answer for every single repost I’ve asked about and I’m tipsy and it’s pissed me off))

Now that that’s all off my chest, I think I can talk to you without crying or exploding with sadness and jealousy. Or maybe I’ll just tipsy nap.

[anonymous-wolf22]

Survey 8

Last time you were attacked by an animal?

Today, about 6 hours ago.

Are you paranoid all the time or just during the night?

Neither.

Have you ever dated someone without knowing their name?

No, why the fuck would anyone do that?

Has a stranger ever asked for your phone/cell number?

No.

Would you help a friend bury a dead body?

Yes. Depending on which friend.

Do you have bad posture?

Sometimes.

Have you ever spelled the word ‘grammar’ wrong?

No, I’m a fucking great speller.

If someone cusses/swears a lot, do you assume they have bad grammar?

No, you know what they say about assuming things, you just make an ass out of u and me.

Is there someone you are avoiding?

Yes.

Is there someone that is avoiding you?

.....

Would you only date people that have the same skin tone as you?

FUCK NO!!! Racist motherfucker.

Are your parents/guardians picky about who you date?

Heh, everyone is entitled to their own opinions, but not them. They can fuck off.

If you go to an all-you-can-eat buffet, how much do you really eat?

A lottttt

If you need to ask a question in class do you raise your hand?

Used to. That’s what like everyone’s teachers wanted them to do in school.

How about speak out loud?

No, we would’ve gotten in trouble for that.

How many times have you been engaged (if any at all)?

Just once, and it’s the best thing ever~

What do you think of the United States?

Ew, fuck. I absolutely hate it. Get me outta this fucking country now please.

Is the United States really the best country in the world?

Definitely not. My answer is a biased answer though.

Do you know where your femur is?

I...think so....?

Do you believe everything you read?

No.

Do you have to see something to really believe it?

Depending on what we’re talking about.

Have you ever gotten so dehydrated that you passed out?

Yes.

If your friend was being cheated on, would you tell them?

Fuck yeah. It wouldn’t be nice to let my friend get hurt like that. It’s easier to tell them sooner rather than later. 

Are you allowed to go off school campus to eat lunch?

Only when we were Juniors. That was the minimum grade for it.

Have you ever been called something and you didn’t know what it meant?

I think so, yeah.

Do you believe everyone is gifted with something?

Yes.

Are you sick and tired of life?

Eh, so-so.

Are you loving life?

Not really life itself, but what I have gotten out of being alive~

Have you ever been busted for underage drinking?

Have yet to drink.

Would you ever change your whole appearance?

If my boyfriend wanted me to, yes, in an instant.

Do you easily give into peer pressure?

No.

Do you have a picture of you and your lover kissing?

Not yet~

Would you become a mathematician if you could?

Fuck no, I hate math and I’m terrible at it.

Have you witnessed a fight at school?

Yes.

Have you ever wanted to grab someone by the throat and squeeze until their head explodes?

Yessss.

Anywho, what’s your favorite movie?

Suicide Squad 1 and Deadpool 1 & 2.

Any movies you’re just dying to see?

Lord of The Rings.

How’s the love life?

Fuck, best thing ever~

Do you have a messy signature?

Not really.

What color are your nails at the moment?

They aren’t colored.

When’s the last time you got a text?

Like 10 minutes ago.

What song is currently resonating through your ear drums?

Hold On - Chord Overstreet and Baby Don’t Cut - Bmike.

What’s your greatest fear?

Being separated from my fiance and dying alone.

How many hours of sleep did you get last night?

4.

Would you consider yourself morbid?

Yes.

Do you keep your nails long or short?

I have a habbit on chewing my nails, but I do want them to be semi-long.

What was the last thing you said out loud?

"She said 11 pm! Where did you get 9 pm from?!”

What was the last thing you stopped yourself from saying?

That I want to move to England.

Who was the last person to call you baby?

My fiance~

Does your name begin with the letter J?

No.

C?

No.

R?

No.

K?

Yes.

S?

No.

Do you need a shower at the moment?

No.

Do you use Bing.com?

No.

What’s the last thing you looked up on any search engine?

’Surveys | Bold what applies to you’

Have you ever considered a career as a porn star?

Nope.

What was the last lie you told?

That I don’t have a partner/boyfriend/fiance/SO

Do you remember the last thing you typed in a Word document?

Yeah, it was another survey that was private for my fiance.

How many pictures do you have saved on your computer?

Of me? None. Of anime/other things? Tons.

Would you consider yourself artistic?

Maybe.

Has anyone told you that you were a good writer?

Nope.

^Do you believe them?

Believe what?

What all do you have pierced?

Ears.

Are there any piercings your currently waiting to get?

No.

What color is your phone?

Gray. 

When was the last time you sneezed?

The other day.

When was the last time you shaved?

Last night.

What’s the longest you’ve ever had your hair?

It's at it's longest right now, halfway down my back.

Are you sleepy at the moment?

No.

What can you see through the window closest to you?

Barely anything, it’s too dark. But I kind of see my mailbox and G-MA’s car.

Have you ever just wanted a re-do on life?

No.

Who/what did you last take a picture of?

My cat.

Do you take pictures of yourself just for Myspace or Facebook?

No.

What were you like 5 years ago?

I was 16 and a major bad boy/play boy and emo.

10?

I was 12, and was very silent.

15?

I was 7 and in love with Usher.

Have you ever wanted a mohawk? A real, 2-foot tall, multicolored mohawk?

No.

When was the last time you spent over $10.00?

Oh, $10, I thought it said $10,000 lol. That would be yesterday’s groceries.

Take a guess - do you have more pairs of socks or underwear?

Socks.

Do you think you could hop on one leg to your kitchen without falling?

Yes, I have good balance - my cat on the other hand..... just knocks my books down as I’m writing this ;-;

Right now, are you wearing eyeliner?

No.

Are you better or worse off than you were two years ago?

Eh, better I guess.

As a kid, what was your favorite playground activity?

The Monkey Bars.

Who do you wish karma would bite in the ass?

My ENTIRE Family!

Have you ever given yourself a google diagnosis when you were sick?

Probably.

Could you (willingly) go ten days without touching a computer?

No, because that would be 10 days of not talking to my fiance.

Have you ever dropped anything in a toilet on accident?

I keep having a vague memory of dropping toilet paper in the toilet....but I don’t really know for sure.

BAM! Chocolate no longer exists. Do you miss it?

GIVE IT BACK YOU MONSTER!!!!!

What is the most annoying sound in your opinion?

Hmmm.... I don’t really know.

QUICK! Fill in the blanks: I wish that _______ would kiss me right now.

My fiance~

Who have you texted today?

My fiance.

Who did you last have over your house, why were they there?



...John, ugh. He was here to help my grandma with life insurance stuff, he works at State Farm and is a ‘friend’ of the family.

What was the last thing to piss you off?



Me. Cause I fell asleep.

Recently, who in your house has gotten on your nerves the most?



Shit, that’s a tie between my brother and my Mom.

What all has pissed you off today, if anything at all?


Not much, just the dogs that tried to bite me when I was riding my bike down the road today.

What does the 10th text in your inbox say?

That a new chapter to a fan-fiction book series I’m reading was released.

How about the 20th sent text?



Haven’t sent anything.

Out of all of your friends, who have you gotten in the worst fight with?



Hmm, probably David. When he had a migraine and told me he was going to lay down and I messaged him like 30 minutes later :( I regret it.

Who was the last person to have to deal with you having an attitude?



My Mom.

If you had $100, how would you spend it?



Is that enough to buy a plane ticket to England?

What’s something you would love to have happen right now?



To move to England and cuddle with my fiance.

You were given the opportunity to get a new cellular device, what do you choose?



Any phone, as long as I could text and send images to my fiance.

How nice of a person are you, honestly?

I'm nice, yeah. But piss me off and you'll be sorry.

What good things have happened today?



Me and my fiance talked.

Is there something you should be doing right now, besides this survey?



Eh, sleeping.

Who was the last person you made plans with?


My Mum.

How many days until your birthday?

I can't be bothered counting, but it's 5 months away.

How old was the last person you kissed?

Haven’t kissed anyone yet.

When do you usually get up in the morning?

Depends on when I go to bed. Varies from 2 am to 6 pm usually.

Where is your favorite place to be when you are sad?

In the dm’s with my fiance.

Do you have any nicknames?

K, (fiance’s nicknames for me:) Kitten, Kitty~

Who was the last person to make you smile?

My fiance.

What color is the floor in the room you are in?

It’s a carpet that’s like a dark-blue-gray-mix.

Have you ever been in a confessional?

??

Do you have blue eyes?

Yes.

Do you have red hair?

No.

Are you Jewish?

No.

Are you taller than 5’6?

Nope ;-;

Are you closer in age to a 10 year old or a 30 year old?

30.

Have you ever broken a finger?

Yes.

What color was the last car you were in?

Red.

Do you have a curfew?

I’m 22, wtf do you think??

Have you ever made out with someone who was just a friend?

Yep.

What month were you born?

July.

How long is your hair?

Halfway down my back.

Do you prefer baths or showers?

Either or.

What would you do if your parents died suddenly?

I can’t wait, I’d be celebrating.

How old will you be in 7 years?

29.

What is the closest holiday to your birthday?

July 4th, Independence Day.

Was today a good day?

Yeah.

What does your last incoming text say, who was it from, and how do you feel about that person?

It;s from twitch notifying me that a channel I followed has went live. And I feel nothing to them.

Did you have a New Year’s kiss?

No.

Are there any words that you cannot pronounce or that you pronounce incorrectly?

Yep.

After a long day at work or of doing something physical what tends to hurt more? Your back or your feet?

My Legs and feet.

Do you have a smart phone? If so, what’s your favorite app?

Nope.

Who would you say is the overall best person you know, and why?

My fiance~ Because, I know everything about him, and I would die for him or kill for him, I don’t do that for many people.

If you had to choose between being a nurse or an English teacher which would you choose and why?

English, because I like spelling.

Do you have a specific gas station you usually go to? Or do you stop wherever?

----

How much older than you was the oldest person you have dated/had a relationship with?

I am 22 and he is 29~ You do the math.

Is anything stressing you out at the moment?

No.

What is your opinion on dating someone who already had a child/children from a previous relationship?

It doesn’t bother me, in fact, bring them on over :3 I love and adore kids, and can’t wait to adopt. Heck, my fiance already has a son and even though I have yet to meet him face-to-face, I already consider him mine~

Have you ever actually found a mascara that makes a huge difference for your lashes?

I don’t wear ANY make-up.

Would you rather have one or two great facial features that stand out, or have just an overall pretty face but have no special features?

Overall pretty.

Do you have any plans for Valentine’s Day? Did you do anything last Valentine’s Day?

No, just bought chocolate for da fam.

Do you check your horoscope daily? If so, did you relate to your horoscope at all today?

Never done it.

When you need to remember something how do you usually go about doing so?

Putting it on the calendar.

How would you describe someone that is your type of guy/girl?

My fiance of course~ Tall, strong, loves gaming, loves kids and the idea of a family, older than me, is a sadist~ Full on bad side, and is the Alpha to My Beta~

Have you recently accomplished anything that you are proud of yourself for?

Just avoiding death earlier today thanks to those doggos.

Are you still friends with any of your exes? Do you still communicate with any of them at all?

Yes and no. It’s complicated.

What is your opinion on people that shop at Sephora for makeup as opposed to buying makeup from the drugstore?

?

Do you live on your own or with your parents/a roommate? Do you think you’d like to live alone?

I live with my family currently. Can’t wait till I move to England though, then I will be with my fiance forever~

How often would you say you use Microsoft Word?

Only when I feel like it or need to.

How often do you typically change your bra?

I don’t wear bra’s.

What is the last online purchase you made?

Nothing.

Do you usually have bad symptoms around “that time of the month”?

I’m a guy ;-;

Is there anyone you have to see on a daily/weekly basis that you really dislike?

.....

Is your hair thick or thin? Would you say it’s easy to manage?

It was thin for awhile but now it’s becoming more thick. And it’s okay.

Have you ever had to deal with any type of long distance relationship, whether it be a romantic relationship or a friendship?

Yes, I’m currently in one. I’m in USA and my fiance is in England, like 5k miles away. (love you baby~)

Are you procrastinating doing anything right now?

Editing my next video to upload on YouTube.

How do you feel about being called sweetie/dear/honey/etc.?

I love it!

Have you ever had a thing for/relationship with a coworker? How did it end?

Don’t have a job yet.

What would you say is your worst habit?

Chewing on my nails or unintentionally avoiding my friends.

Do you have a place you go to a lot that you may be considered “a regular��� at?

Probably.

What is the weather currently like where you live?

It's calm and clear and cloudless. It's 12 am.

Do you have any plans for Mardi Gras?

Don’t know.

[paganinpurple]

MariChat May - It Was You - Day 2: Purring

Buy Me A Coffee?

Here, as promised, chapter 10! This leads directly into Waiting and Wanting which was the Rooftop Kisses prompt.

It Was You

<< Chapter 1     Chapter 9     Chapter 10     Chapter 11

Accidental Cuddling

As Marinette started to wake up all her mind could comprehend was warm and heavy. Whenever she normally woke up, Marinette felt cold. She had a bad habit of kicking her duvet away as she slept and so she would usually arrive on the conscious plain uncovered and chilly before grumpily grabbing for the edge of her covers and wrapping herself up like a burrito.

Today however, she was pleasantly cosy. Her arms still felt a little cold where they lay across her forehead and pillow but otherwise she was quite comfortable. At least in temperature she was comfortable. However her duvet had remained covering her was her number one mystery, but a close second was why it was multiple times heavier than it usually was. She shifted her leg to try and make herself more comfortable and awoke instantly, eyes snapping open, as it came in contact with another leg which didn't belong to her.

Marinette kept her eyes trained on the ceiling above her bed, desperately clinging to the hope that if she didn't look down, what she suspected couldn't really be happening. Even her spectacular level of denial couldn't avoid it forever though, and she found her head tilting and her eyes slowly moving to glance down at the blonde head of hair resting against her chest.

Although she remained perfectly still, internally Marinette was Freaking Out with capital letters. She remembered Chat not wanting to go home last night and her making a border-line humiliating offer to let him sleep in her bed. She had thought that would be as embarrassing as it would get. Clearly she had simply lacked the imagination necessary to see this chain of events coming.

A rumbling sensation against her lower rib cage took her by surprise and she gasped as Chat's hand, which had been lying against the mattress next to her curled up and around the back of her shoulder to pull her close.

She took stock of the rest of their current position and felt her face gaining more and more heat as she went on. She was lying sprawled out on her back with one leg bent and the other straight and Chat was lying between them, the side of his head using her chest as a pillow as he slept. His other arm was under her, lying tucked into the small of her back and he was honest-to-goodness purring.

She'd had absolutely no idea he could purr before. He'd never done it in the whole time she'd known him as Ladybug and as Marinette and she was certain he'd never mentioned it before. She tried to shift her leg again, to see if she could lever it under him to escape the suggestive position they were settled in, but not only was it difficult and awkward to do, it caused Chat to groan and the vibration against her ribs died. She froze, praying to any deity that would listen that he didn't wake up until she'd found a way to make this less mortifying for them both.

After a few moments of breathless panic, Chat's face relaxed again and he rubbed his cheek against her breast as if fluffing a pillow. She whined quietly, intimately aware that this was the most action she'd ever had with a boy and it was completely and humiliatingly unintentional. She felt the rumbling sensation start up again and this time it was accompanied by a loud purring sound from his throat.

Her arms began to ache from the way they were slung above her head but she was unsure what to do with them now that she had a boy slung across her. Hesitantly, she lifted her right arm above them and brought it down gently to rest on his back, just below his shoulder. His face began to move back and forth against her chest again and his purr intensified.

As she lifted her other arm over his head to rest it on his side, his head lifted off of her chest ever so slightly and pushed into her hand. She didn't dare move her hand away as he rubbed his hair against it until she realised he was still unconscious and all of his movements were still on autopilot. She dropped her hand into his hair fully and he relaxed back onto her chest as she started to gently scratch behind his cat ears. If Marinette had thought his purring was loud until now she was grossly unprepared for the machine gun motor sound which he suddenly produced as she manipulated his hair and ears with her hand.

Marinette suddenly found she was no longer bothered by their intimate position, instead choosing to enjoy Chat's kitty-like behaviour and running her hands along his spine and scratching behind his ears, both human and cat. In return Chat's hands gripped at her shoulder and back tightly and he continued to rub his cheek against her like an affectionate kitten would.

She went to work discovering all the spots he enjoyed being petted and quickly found that the nape of his neck was particularly sensitive, eliciting a cat-like noise of pleasure from him. She giggled at the sound and brought both hands to his shoulders before dragging them up and over his neck and into his hair to scratch. By this point, Marinette had all but forgotten that he wasn't actually an animal at all but a teenage boy, at least until his head turned and instead of continuing to rub his cheek against her, he was rubbing the front of his face into her breasts, his nose dipping into her cleavage.

Marinette squeaked and jumped in place on the bed, startling Chat who slowly lifted his face as if to look at her, eyes starting to blink open.

“Prin...cess?” he asked groggily around his purr and Marinette's self-preservation instincts jumped in to save her from the impending shame.

“What-!? Get off!” she screamed at him, shoving him from between her legs and to the other side of the bed, his purr halting instantly.

Chat just lay there on his side for a second or two, blinking as he tried to put two and two together and work out why he had been shoved so roughly. She could tell the exact moment he realised what had happened and his face and neck flushed scarlet to match her own as he stuttered out a hasty apology.

“Oh mon Dieu. I'm sooo sorry, please don't hate me. I didn't mean to- Oh Dieu, what did I do?” he sputtered.

“I-I don't know what happened exactly,” she lied, “I just woke up. You must be...I think you must be a cuddly sleeper.”

“What can I do to-”

“Can we just...not talk about it?” she asked, cutting him off.

“Deal,” he said swiftly, “I, uh, have to get going anyway. The person looking after me will be looking for me soon.”

“Okay,” she said in a flat voice, burying her face in her hands in mortification and trying to will down the heat that had bloomed across her face and shoulders. She didn't look up again until she heard her skylight close behind him and worried if she had ruined things between them irreparably by forcing the blame onto her poor kitty.

Buy Me A Coffee?

[ecotone99]

[HR] [SP] Don't hide, don't be afraid.

“3...2...1...Go!” The high, shrill voice shouted out into crisp Autumn air. A little boy ran, arms swinging at his sides, feet crunching in fallen leaves, breath puffing out hard. He saw a tree and dashed around it, then sat down, leaning against the trunk as he got his breath back. “Ellis, I see you!” a voice called out a moment later. “Your leg is sticking out.” “You’re so bad at hide and seek, Ellis! Why are you so clumsy?” the other boy laughed before continuing. “I heard you running through the leaves like an elephant.” “Whatever,” Ellis muttered in the petulant way of a small child. “Just wait, Travis. Next time, I’m gonna be so good you won’t find me in a million years!” “Oh really.” Travis snorted. “Whatever. Let’s look for Janet.” The two were walking off when a voice called to them. “Hey boys, it’s time for lunch! Where’s your sister?” “I’m right here!” A young girl wearing a Hello Kitty shirt erupted from behind a pile of leaves. “What!” Travis gasped, “You were right behind us the whole time?” Janet giggled.

A tear ran down Ellis’ cheek, and he began to sob uncontrollably. He didn’t understand why this memory was so vivid in his mind. He hadn’t thought about it in all the years since it happened. It wasn’t important, just another normal day from back when life was normal and a family could enjoy a beautiful Fall day in peace. Ellis turned his head to the sky colored like rotting meat, gasping and retching. Just an hour ago, everything had been alright. It was his father’s turn to collect rations. He promised his mother as always that he would come back safely. After about forty minutes, he returned empty handed, panting as if he’d run the whole way. Ellis and his siblings stared fearfully from the staircase while he spoke urgently to their mother in a hushed voice. “What happened?” “When I got there, they were packing up. Said they got word a band of...things...was sweeping through the city. Killing anything that moved.” “What!?” “We have to leave. Now. Grab some food and water and let’s go. There’s no time to pack anything else.” She stared at him for a moment, eyes wide, as if not wanting to accept what he was saying. Then she turned and swiftly dashed upstairs. Their father turned and saw the children watching. He walked slowly over to them and crouched down so his face was even with theirs. After a long sigh, he said, “I’m sorry, but something bad is coming. We have to go. I...I’m not going to lie to you. Life’s been hard these past few years, and it’s probably about to get harder. But...it’s going to be okay. We’ll pull through.” He held out his arms and embraced the three of them, kissing them each on the cheek. After a long moment, he pulled away and stood up. A tramp of feet on the stairs signaled the return of Ellis’ mother, carrying two bulging backpacks. “Alright.” She said. “This is everything I could fit.” Suddenly, a scraping was heard outside the house. The red-green light outside the windows was blotted out by a dark shape. “Oh my god,” Ellis’ mother whispered. “Shit!” said her husband softly, “We could try to go out the back door.” The sound of splintering wood. Something was thrust through the wall. Ellis’ father grabbed his mother’s arm and pulled her over to the kids. “We’re going to hide in the basement. Now!” He hissed. They ran to the basement door, pulled it open, and went inside. Ellis’ mother fumbled with the lock. “Walk down the stairs. Be as quiet as you can.” She whispered. They tiptoed down, hearts hammering when a board in the old staircase creaked. Ellis’ mother followed a few moments later. “We should hide behind those old refrigerators.” She pointed. The five began to move slowly in the indicated direction. They could hear heavy thuds from the ceiling above. Crossing the space of about twenty feet from the bottom of the stairs to the fridges felt like it took an hour. When they finally reached their destination, they began to slide in single file into the narrow space between the large metal boxes and the wall. Ellis was last. He took a step in the dark. Suddenly, a cacophony of noise filled the blackness. He had bumped against a metal pail holding two shovels that the family had used for gardening. Now it was upended, its contents spilled on the hard concrete floor. Ellis froze in place, holding back a scream. From above, a bizarre noise was heard, like a cross between an animal growling and an electronic music concert. The ceiling caved in.

Ellis didn’t know how long he ran but when he stopped, his legs collapsed under him. They didn’t burn, just felt completely numb and unresponsive. Spots of color danced before his eyes. He lay on the ground for a long time, breathing hard. When he finally got shakily to his feet, he almost fell again. He was dizzy and his stomach churned. He stared upward, sobbing. He could feel something wet and sticky on his side. Blood was splattered on his shirt. Pulling it up and looking underneath, he saw no wound. A lump grew in his throat and he finally keeled over, heaving into the dirt. He stayed hunched over for a few minutes with his eyes closed, not moving. When he finally opened his eyes, he saw something lying in front of him, spattered with his vomit. It looked like a piece of paper. Slowly, he picked it up with a shaking hand and held it to his face. Neatly typewritten letters filled the white page.

Dear Ellis,

I understand that what you’re going through right now is difficult. Believe me, I still remember and regret it. The fact remains that, however unfortunate, it is a necessary step in the fulfillment of your destiny. You see, you are meant to become more than human. More than you can imagine. I don’t expect you to understand this now, but remember: don’t give up hope. You will survive. I know you will. Let revenge motivate you if you want, although I am confident that eventually you will grow beyond such concerns. I offer you one bit of advice. Learn to be still. Learn to be silent. Conceal yourself so well even the darkness around you does not know you’re there. Do not hide. Hiding is passive and for those who are afraid. Instead, stalk the shadows without fear. Your time will come. Oh, and also, you might want to follow the creek north. It’s a few blocks to your right.

- Sincerely, a friend

Ellis dropped the note on the ground. Its contents should have perplexed him, but his mind was blank. Suddenly, he felt a light tap on the back of his head. He whirled around. Nothing was there. Wait. He saw something moving in the shadows of an alleyway about fifty feet away. A large, dark shape. For a moment, he just stood, staring. Then fear flooded into his brain and he dashed away. Discordant screeching came from behind, and he heard heavy thudding. It was getting closer. Still. Silent. The words flashed through his mind. Looking frantically around, he saw a small stream running beside him. After a moment’s hesitation, he dove into the shallow water, lying face down. He squeezed his eyes tightly shut and held his breath.

submitted by /u/virtual_cephalopod [link] [comments] via Blogger https://ift.tt/2LY8A1k

[booksbeyondimagining]

To All the Boys I've Loved Before (To All the Boys I've Loved Before #1), by Jenny Han

Publish Date: April 15, 2014 Published by: Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers Pages: 369 Genre: YA Romance My Rating: ★★★★★ (4.5 out of 5 stars)

Synopsis:

What if all the crushes you ever had found out how you felt about them… all at once? Sixteen-year-old Lara Jean Song keeps her love letters in a hatbox her mother gave her. They aren’t love letters that anyone else wrote for her; these are ones she’s written. One for every boy she’s ever loved—five in all. When she writes, she pours out her heart and soul and says all the things she would never say in real life, because her letters are for her eyes only. Until the day her secret letters are mailed, and suddenly, Lara Jean’s love life goes from imaginary to out of control.

My Review:

So, I've had this one sitting in my ereader for a couple of years now, and never felt like the right mood for it. But with the movie coming out on Netflix and seeing the trailer and all the posts about it on social media, the cuteness overload made me crave reading it to no end so of course I finally caved (despite having like four other books already in my currently-reading pile). This was fast-paced, funny and cute, with so much realness to it that I felt like the characters could easily walk off the page and into my life. I loved Jenny Han's writing style. It is very sharp and refined, but also full of life and beauty. The chapters are short, almost like small little vignettes into Lara Jean's life that all flow together to create a wonderful story, and the pacing is fast, pulling the reader along for the ride with ease. I enjoyed the tiny things that were mentioned throughout, little tidbits of Peter and Lara Jean's growing relationship and knowledge of each other. The sister theme was also very strong, and was beautifully written and felt so very real in every sense of what it means to have a sister. The whole thing just felt so down-to-earth and realistic in both the storytelling and the characters and had a way of making me feel happy no matter what. I thought Lara Jean was a great protagonist. She had me laughing out loud, cheering for her, feeling upset for her, and getting angry on her behalf. I'll admit there was times I thought she could be a little childish and naive, but I could also understand why she was so in those situations. Peter was surprisingly not what I expected based on what I've seen on social media - I thought he was going to be this perfect handsome gentleman, but he turned out to be such a regular teenager that it was kind of even better. Sure, he is kind and goes out of his way to make Lara Jean happy, but he also makes many mistakes and has flaws and can be an oblivious guy at times. They balanced each other well and I loved how natural their interactions were and every moment they spent time together was a bright point on the page. I think of all the other characters, though, my favorite had to be Kitty. She was such a snake. I loved how manipulative she could be, both for herself and for her sisters. And the way she spoke to Peter the first time she met him had me in tears. She is definitely a girl after my own heart. The dynamic between Margot and Lara Jean, on the other hand, was definitely both positive and negative, with a great relationship between them based on Margot's care for Lara Jean and Lara Jean's respect for Margot, but there was also the issue of Margot having a bit of a control issue over Lara Jean's life - constantly making suggestions about clubs and internships for Lara Jean to do, and also telling her that Peter wasn't good for her even though she barely knew him herself. These sisters don't have a perfect relationship, and that made for all the better a story and family dynamic. My only issue would probably have to be with Genevieve. She seemed to be a grade-A b*tch with no redeeming factor whatsoever. Her excuse for no longer being friends with Lara Jean? Kind of dumb. [SPOILER] She got angry at her for kissing Peter in seventh grade. (She also said it was at her house, when before it was said to be at a guy's house and they were alone so I don't even know how she found out about it? Plothole?) It's strange because he was the one who kissed her, and this was the second utterance of a guy kissing a girl where the girl gets blamed as though she had helped initiate the kiss in the first place. Why is Lara Jean being blamed for something she did not want to happen in the first place? [END SPOILER] Anyway, back to Gen - I just absolutely despised her and how her character was written. I couldn't understand just what Peter ever saw in her, and without a redemption arc, I felt zero sympathy for her. I think something more was needed in order to make her character feel more real, because as it was, she came off far too stereotyped and flat on the page. Oh, actually, there is one other issue I have - the ending. Ugh. Why do you play me like that, Jenny Han? [SPOILER] Where's my reconciliation moment between Peter and Lara Jean. I mean, there's obviously hope but I want an actual scene!! [END SPOILER]  Way to force me into reading that sequel.  Like I wasn't going to already. Otherwise, this was an excellent read. It was cute, realistic, and had me laughing out loud often. The characters are full of depth and life, and the writing is sweet and succinct. It is a fun and enjoyable story, with many ups and downs, and many, many moments to put a smile on your face.

Warning: this book may cause cookie cravings.