#like there are plenty of things i do think are working

[enyaliuswrites]

➽ Just for Practice

Caleb x fem!reader Thank you @erensfeed for the idea and all the help she gave me!! Tysm nunnie! Hope this is a nice surprise for when you wake up <3 warnings: suggestive topics, mature, kissing (of course)

"Kissing? That’s what got you so worked up? Kissing is why you haven’t been eating my braised pork?" Caleb's lilac eyes fix on you like you’re crazy, a hint of something darker lurking beneath as he frowns.

"Ugh, I told you you wouldn’t get it." you groan, flopping onto your bed in frustration and avoiding his gaze, you didn’t want to see Caleb judging you.

Your high school graduation is just a few months away, but so far, every girl in your class won’t stop talking about the people they’ve kissed this year. Some have only had one kiss, others have had plenty, but out of all of them, you’re the only one who hasn’t had a single one yet. It’s not your fault—you’ve just never found yourself even a little bit attracted to anyone at school.

You didn’t even notice your appetite waning, your mind preoccupied with this. With graduation nearing, the last thing you wanted was to feel left out—missing out on bonding with your friends was the last thing you wanted.

“What’s so special about kissing?? It barely means anything.” his face twists into confusion and disgust, as if really trying to grasp why you’re making such a big deal out of this. Caleb silent mouths ‘kissing?’ before shifting his gaze back to you—just in time for you to throw a pillow straight at his face. But the pillow stops mid-air in front of his face, before dropping onto his lap as he leans back against the chair at your study desk.

“All of my friends have already had their first kiss. That’s like the only thing they’re talking about these days.” Your lips push up into a pout as you grab one of the stuffed animals nearest to you and hug it, allowing your head to rest on the plushie.

“And you’re jealous?” You choke on your saliva, coughing and hacking as your wide eyes meet his—one eyebrow raised and eyes heavy with disbelief. Caleb would’ve never guessed that his girl would grow up to be worried over something as minuscule as a kiss, especially a kiss with someone else.

“I’m not jealous! I mean like… It’s not like… Okay, maybe just a little?” your hands flail wildly all over as you try to defend yourself, but to no avail. Feeling a blush creeping onto your cheeks, you take a quick glance and see that Caleb's gaze has darkened.

“Do you even know how to kiss?”

“Caleb… That’s a stupid question,” you murmur, already knowing the answer. Caleb knew that too. “Why would I be so worked up if I—”

With his lilac eyes fixed on you, he tilts his head slightly, then leans forward. “Would you like to know how?” His words cut through your sentence, leaving your lips parted in shock as you prop yourself back up, still clutching the plushie to your chest.

“What? What do you mean?” your brain struggles to process his words, unable to fully make sense of them as you frown and watch him get up. Caleb's tall figure towers over yours as he steps closer, leaning casually against the wall, making you tilt your head up to meet his gaze.

“I can teach you then, Pip-squeak.” His body lowers, closing the gap between you two as your grip on the plushie loosens. You try to back away, only to find your back pressing against the headboard just inches away.

“I… I mean… does this count as my first kiss?” His right hand reaches out, gently caressing your cheek before softly holding your chin, guiding it towards him.

“Hmm. Think of this as practice.” Caleb's grip on your chin is soft and gentle, completely opposite from his hazy, clouded gaze.

“Oh. Oh…kay then-” you draw the ‘o’ out but as soon as the confirmation leaves your mouth, his lips brush softly against yours. With your eyes closed shut and brows furrowed, he slowly moves, capturing your bottom lip between his own with a delicate pull.

Your body sinks further into the mattress, plush pillows pressing against your back. The bed groans under Caleb's weight as he closes the distance between you, one large palm placed on your hips while the other rests on the headboard. You kiss him back, or at least you try to. You move your lips in the same motion of waves as he does, but everything feels so awkward and off.

Feeling quite embarrassed, and out of air, your intended gently nudges on Caleb's tank top quickly turns into desperate grasps before the kiss finally breaks. You felt like you’ve just ran a marathon—body burning up and your lungs out of breath as you pant, trying to inhale as much oxygen as you could while avoiding eye contact. Though it was harder than you thought, because Caleb was now on top of you, his smirk haunting you as your cheeks flush.

“H-hey! Don’t look at me like that. I told you I don’t know how to kiss…” Your voice grows quieter each passing second as it somehow ends up as a tiny squeak. The sound of Caleb's laughter fills your ears as you turn back to him, his knee now finds itself between your legs as his face hovers just above yours.

“You’re overthinking this, Pip-squeak. Just follow what I do.” Though his words are reassuring, that husky tone in his voice throws you off as he quickly captures your lips into a kiss for the second time. Caleb's lips move against yours in a soft, sensual way as you try your best to mimic him. Remembering what he did to you, you trap the soft fullness of his lower lip and gently apply suction to it. His hums of approval catch you off guard as you feel a subtle rumble of his chest—Caleb's hand snaking down to the small of your back, before pulling your body flush against his.

As if a flip has just been switched, Caleb's lips move frantically against yours, biting your lower lips then soothing the sting with his tongue. Your lips part at the sudden pain, allowing his tongue to delve into your mouth. Soft whimpers escape from your throat as Caleb explores you, tracing every corner and leaving an odd-yet-pleasurable feeling as he does so. Surprised, and a little scared, you push his body off of yours as you cover your mouth in shock, the faint apple taste still lingering in your mouth.

“Your tongue… Do you still use that apple flavored toothpaste or something? Because that’s all I’m feeling? Tasting?” Caleb grabs your hands, lowering it as a light chuckle leaves his lips.

“You’re a natural, Pip-squeak.” Completely ignoring what you just said as his thumb caresses your cheek and he stares at your lips, as if capturing them in a kiss with his eyes, “But I think you need a little bit more practice. What do you say?”

“Oh….Um…” Your voice comes out as uncertain mumbles and murmurs while his face only inches closer to yours. That’s when you realize how Caleb's body is pressed against yours, radiating heat—how heat crept up his neck and spreaded to his ears. How his lilac eyes were still clouded with a hazy and clouded look.

“I think you need more practice.” Caleb already had a taste of you and now he can’t get enough. Your scent seeps into his senses, impossible to ignore—like an addict chasing his next fix. He took your first kiss and now he’s going to take your every first. He was going to make sure of it.

A/N: Ughhh, this was quite hard to write considering I’ve never kissed anyone before. BUT. I have read many writings about kissing so I hope that’ll make up for this. Stay delusional ya’lls! (*´∀`*) Dividers by @omi-resources

[acid-ixx]

why do people who send hate messages have to hide through anons, LMAO. first of all, if anybody wants to confront me, or any other writers, then do so without hiding through the safety of anons.

secondly, i do post occasional updates about my writing progress because i don't want others to think that i'm abandoning my writing + i'm not the only writer here spamming the yan batfam tag??? and i don't do so frequently. i'm not calling anybody out, but it's not only me spamming tags with just answering random asks and posts unrelated to it, no?

and as much as i love to write, i have a life outside of tumblr and as prideful as this sounds, let's see how you can try to emulate writing a chapter more than 10k words because you don't want to publish a half-assed fanfic for others to consume.

i take my time, and if that time may take months then let me, because i don't get paid to write, and all the things i post in my blog are self-indulgent, not an obligation. there's plenty of other people out there who can produce works quickly, but not me.

thirdly, yes, i agree. there are more talented writers than me. they deserve more followers and i stand by that! my writing style is simple, very inconvenient at times, but it's what makes me comfortable, it's what makes me happy, but with your last message, it's like you're implying i don't deserve my own space in the writing community, especially in the batfam tags. there's no rules saying that just because i update slowly, then suddenly i'm undeserving of posting in the tags with updates in my work? seriously, anon, this sounds more like barely disguised jealousy and no offense, it's honestly pathetic if you think it hurts my feelings. if people don't like the way i write, then block me, unfollow me, confront me, do whatever.

before anymore hate is sent, i'll be turning off anons temporarily soon. and yes, i'll be posting this in the tags because i know i'm not the only author being targeted by hate asks, this is all for awareness. and to all those wanting to send hate, at least don't hide behind a mask of safety lol.

[harrywavycurly]

Absolutely loving killer Harry! I love how protective of us he is and how just caring and in love he is with us. Though has there ever been a time where he was the one where he desperately needed someone or us for comfort? Has he ever been that vulnerable with us?

Hiii lovey!! So I think 100000% Harry has had moments of insecurity and thinks he’s not enough for you and that’s sort of why he needs you to comfort him a bit! So I hope you enjoy this!!💖

Find all things Loving a Killer here✨

CW: Harry is a killer in this series but it’s only mentioned briefly and no details are given in this update about what he’s done.

Tag List: @umadirectioner @styleswithaseaview @sunflower-tia

Summary: Harry has a bad day and just needs you to comfort him a bit✨

It’s rare that Harry lets anyone see him at his lowest when the weight of all the horrible things he’s done rests on his shoulders and he feels as if he doesn’t deserve the happiness he’s found in life, the happiness he has all because of you. You’re the one person who has seen Harry in this state, he doesn’t bother putting up a wall with you because you know him too well and while he does keep things from you, such as what he really does for a living, he is actually very forthcoming with his feelings with you because most of the time it’s just him telling you how much he loves you and how you’re the best thing that ever happened to him. But something he’s learned in his years of being with you and especially in the years he’s been married to you is that it’s just as important for him to share how he’s feeling in the not so great moments as well as the happy ones, it’s what helps you understand him a bit more and get to see his more vulnerable side that he doesn’t share with anyone else.

That’s why having Harry’s head resting in your lap while you’re sat at the edge of the bed with him on his knees between your legs isn’t that shocking, you could tell he was feeling a little down the moment he got home from work a few hours earlier. You run a hand through his hair as he lets out a sigh and closes his eyes, the feeling of your nails lightly scratching his scalp making him relax the tiniest bit. He hasn’t said anything to you minus that he loves you but that was as he was getting ready for bed, he’s been silence since then even when he dropped to his knees in front of you while you were putting your lotion on and rested his head in your lap and securely wrapped himself around you and you don’t mind because you know he will talk when he��s ready.

“Can I ask you something?” You look down at him as he mumbles his question into the fabric of your pajama pants.

“You can ask me anything you want.” You tell him as your free hand rests on the top of his shoulder so you can give it a small squeeze.

“Do you think you’ll always love me?” He knows he shouldn’t be asking you this while you have no clue about the horrible things he does and has done in the time you’ve known him but he just needs some reassurance in this very moment so he doesn’t really care how unfair he’s being.

“I know I’ll always love you.” You answer with a smile as you continue running your fingers through his hair. “There’s nothing you could do that would ever make me stop loving you.” Your soft and gentle tone lets him know you mean every word and Harry wants to smile but he can’t because of the guilt he feels knowing that he’s already done plenty of things that would make all the love you have for him fade away and turn into disgust and anger.

“I don’t deserve you.” He says with a sigh as his arms around your middle tighten almost as if he’s afraid that if his hold on you loosens even just the tiniest bit you’ll slip away from him. You feel the corners of your mouth drop at his words, hating that whatever thoughts he’s got swirling around in his mind are making him feel like he’s not good enough. You bring your hand up and place it on his cheek that’s not pressed against your thighs, you softly run your thumb over his cheekbone as your other hand plays with the hair at the back of his neck.

“Well I know you don’t hear this a lot but you’re wrong.” You watch as your words make Harry’s mouth twitch like he’s fighting off a smile. “You deserve me because I deserve you.” You swallow the small lump that’s forming in your throat as you look over at your nightstand that has a photo of you and Harry from your wedding day sitting in a pretty frame next to your lamp.

“No one can love me the way you do. No one can make me feel like I’m the most important person in the whole world the way you do. No one can protect me the way you do. So you saying you don’t deserve me is like you’re trying to tell me I don’t deserve the kind of happiness that I only get when I’m with you.” Harry’s eyes open as soon as he hears you sniffle and you don’t even have time to wipe away the few tears that have escaped before he’s sitting up making your hands fall into your lap while his come up to gently cup the sides of your face, his thumbs softly wiping away the tears for you.

“You deserve all the happiness in the world.” He tells you with as much softness he can muster as he feels his heart begin to crack at the sight of you getting upset because you just want him to know how loved he makes you feel. While he’s glad he makes you feel this way he also hates that a part of him knows the reason he goes so overboard with his love and affection for you is because he thinks maybe if he treats you the best he possibly can you won’t want to leave the moment you find out the monster he really is.

“And I get that when I’m with you.” Harry hates knowing your happiness is tied up in being with him because he knows there’s a small possibility that somewhere down the line he won’t be able to be around anymore, either because a job goes wrong or someone stumbles upon his preferred burial site that holds more than a few skeletons of his. “Is there something wrong that we need to work on? Are you not-”

“No baby there’s nothing wrong.” He says quickly stopping you from asking any other questions because he can’t stand the thought of you thinking you have anything to do with his mood this evening. “I just sometimes think this-this life we’ve made with each other is almost too good to be true and-and I get in my head about how one day you’re going to realize how fucked up I am and you’ll run for the hills.” His thumbs are still softly rubbing over your cheeks as he finally lets you in on the types of things that have been rolling around in his mind lately.

“I already know how fucked up you are Harry.” His eyes stare into yours as you bring your hands up and rest them on top of his. “You wake up before the sun rises to work out. You also prefer cold showers unless I’m joining you and force you to take a hot one. You are so organized I don’t even know where half our stuff even is. And you eat beans on toast. You’re an actual freak.” You explain with a small sniffle while you wrap your hands around his wrists, Harry appreciates your attempt at trying to change the mood of the conversation because he doesn’t know how much longer he can watch tears slip down your face.

“But you love me right?” He asks as he leans in to place a kiss to your forehead.

“I’ll never love anyone the way I love you so don’t think even for a minute that I’ll ever leave you okay?” Harry just nods as you give his wrists a squeeze and that’s when you notice his eyes have gotten a little misty. “I promise I’m not going anywhere.” You reassure him as you move your hands from his wrist and up to his face while his hands drop to your shoulders.

“Good.” You smile as you feel him lean into your touch. “You mean everything to me you know that right?” You give him a small nod as you hear the emotion in his voice. “I love you.” He says softly as you lean in and rest your forehead against his as a few stray tears roll down his face. “I’m sor-” Harry’s apology is cut off by the feeling of your lips on his in a sweet kiss.

“I love you too.” You mumble against his lips as his hands slip into your hair keeping your face close to his. “You don’t have to apologize to me. You didn’t do anything wrong.” Harry closes his eyes for a moment as you take your thumbs and wipe away the last of his tears while he take a few seconds to let your words sink in, ignoring the ever present guilt that wants to work its way up his chest and into his throat so he can come clean and just tell you everything he’s done wrong that would make you change your mind and demand an apology and probably a divorce from him.

But Harry decides that while yes he does unspeakable things and hurts people for a living, there’s a reason he walked into the cafe you worked at all those years ago and maybe it was because the universe or whatever it may be knew you were exactly what he needed in his life. He felt lost before he met you, just going through the motions of life with no real purpose until you came along and gave him one. That’s why he will always drop whatever he’s doing if you need him because your happiness is his main priority and it’s the same reason he’d leave and make sure you never saw him again if you ever do decide to be done with him.

He hasn’t ever loved anyone as much as he loves you and as he leans in and places a kiss to your lips he knows you love him just as much when he feels you pull him closer when you think he’s about to pull away, not wanting him to get too far but you have nothing to worry about because Harry isn’t going anywhere. The two of you are it for each other and he feels a sense of relief wash over him as that realization hits him, momentarily putting him at ease.

“You really think I’m a freak because of the beans on toast thing?” He teases once you actually allow him to pull away and you roll your eyes as he places little kisses to the tip of your nose and then both cheeks.

“Yes.” He smiles as you run a hand through his hair. “But you’re my freak.”

“Oh really? And here I was thinking you were my little freak.” He chuckles at the way your cheeks get pink as he leans down and gives you a quick peck making you smile when he pulls away. It’s a smile that makes Harry’s heart want to burst because it’s the smile you give him when he can tell you’re truly happy and that’s all Harry wants, he just wants to be able to make you smile like that for as long as he can.

[leighsartworks216]

Claw Machines

Sylus x gn!Reader & MC

Raven deserves the world and more and I need to heal their inner child so so bad and who better to help than MC?

Warnings: fluff, silly, growing friendship, arcades, healing their inner child, kissing, swearing, banter

Word Count: 1,678

Main Masterlist

The Raven Masterlist

First Love and Deepspace Masterlist

Second Love and Deepspace Masterlist

Third Love and Deepspace Masterlist

AO3

Tag List Form

Sylus was 'busy', but you're dead certain that was just an excuse to nudge you into bonding with Miss Hunter. When she'd called to invite him out, you saw the smirk that curled his lips. You'd glared at him when he said you'd take his spot. You'd even been tempted to ditch her, but you couldn't in the end, knowing how much she means to him.

The claw moves around the box, following the movements of the little joystick. She looks as if she's facing down a Wanderer, not a stuffed koala with a teddy bear. Her tongue pokes out of her mouth, head swivels to the sides of the box to make sure she's lined up properly, fingers tapping impatiently on the machine before she hits the button. The claw descends. Closes. And as it rises, the koala is stuck in its grasp.

"Yes!" Miss Hunter laughs giddily as she bends down and grabs her prize from the chute. She squishes its face, eyes shining brilliantly with glee. Suddenly, she turns to you. "Have you ever played before?"

You shake your head, appearing quite bored with the whole thing.

"Do you want to try it? I can give you some pointers!"

A relentlessly stubborn part of you wants to refuse. Stand around like her own personal bodyguard while she travels from machine to machine with tokens purchased with Sylus's card and a bag full of toys.

But... you're also curious. You'd peered through shop windows and seen kids with toys your whole childhood, without any hope of having one to call your own. You'd made peace with that a long time ago, aided in the fact you now have plenty of money to live comfortably, though you keep that money close to your chest. Now Miss Hunter's barging through that peace, eyes shining and full of childish energy. And you give in.

You step up hesitantly to the controls. She squeals in glee and stands right beside you, nearly leaning on your arm. "Okay, this is the joystick! You use it to move the claw around. And then when you're lined up with something, you push this button and it'll try grabbing it."

You quirk an eyebrow at her. She smiles deviously. "It's a lot harder than it looks, trust me."

You should have listened to her. She makes it look so easy; you have to wonder if she's somehow using her Evol to cheat. No matter what target you went for, it always slipped through. Sometimes in the most ridiculous ways - bouncing off the edge of the plastic surrounding the chute or flipping off into an unreachable corner. You're not usually one to give up on a challenge, but this is getting ridiculous.

Miss Hunter smiles apologetically at you after your target falls over, just out of reach of the claw. "Maybe this machine isn't calibrated well," she suggests, but it's a half-baked excuse. "Let's try another one."

So you do.

And another.

... And another.

It's agony. She'll take over, pleading with big round eyes and a pout that works like a charm on Sylus to play a round, and get a plushie on her first try. Her bag is almost overflowing. She considers asking for a second one, but she looks sorry when she says so out loud.

Another machine catches her eye and she dashes over like a child. You watch her go.

It's... confusing, contradictory, to see someone like her be so carefree and childish. Her life has not been a cakewalk, and she's been through things normal people would never recover from. Yet here she is, squealing and giggling with delight, while you stand amid the flashing lights and chiming bells, arms crossed and frowning.

You hate to think you could ever possibly be jealous of her. Jealousy was unnecessary when you had all the means to get what you wanted so easily. Still, it's difficult not to envy in some ways the ease with which she enjoys such simple things.

You sigh. You damn Sylus for having you take his place on this little playdate with Miss Hunter. Damn the machines and their stupid claws. Damn all the plushies that seem to hate you.

The arcade is relatively small. When you begin walking around the various machines, it's easy to keep an eye on her. After all, if something happened to her here, it would be your fault. And you don't exactly want a repeat of last time.

It's by pure chance you happen to glance over. Pure random chance that your eyes slipped onto a series of miniature claw machines, stacked 3-on-3 in an alley between the bigger machines. You would not have stopped if you hadn't then done a double-take to make sure you saw what you thought you saw. And sure enough, as you step up to the small machines, you see in one a tiny keychain in the shape of a crow.

It's adorable. Big eyes that take up half its body stare longingly out at the arcade, half-closed with an air of disinterest. A little white ruff wraps all around its body. Two little feet with three toes each stick out the bottom.

You glance around to find Miss Hunter. She's moved on to the Balance machines, where her skilled fingers shift the two-pronged claw to nudge the box off the poles. An employee already stands there, waiting to re-setup the machine, as they chat with familiarity. She seems safe enough...

After a moment of watching to make sure the employee doesn't try anything, you reach into your pocket and pull out the tokens she gave you earlier. You insert one, and a small LED display counts down a timer.

The joystick is tiny in your hand - you can only imagine how it would fit in Sylus's. You shift it over top the crow. After spending however long failing on the other machines, you don't have much hope, especially when these are designed to give the impression of being easier so people will want to try them even more. You push the tiny button, and the claw lowers. The crow is picked up, shifting slightly in its loose hold. It's carried to the chute...

A tiny jingle plays, similar to the one that follows Miss Hunter around every machine.

You... you did it?

You hesitate before opening the little hatch, as though you just imagined all of that and you're going to be woefully out of luck when you reach in to find it empty. But no. You reach in and your fingers touch soft fur. You pull it out. There he is - your very own tiny crow plush.

The crow's big eyes seem to stare up at you, unimpressed. But your mind says he's happy, free from his cramped little prison.

Footsteps approach and you're immediately back on alert. You'd been smiling without even realizing it, but that is wiped away for neutrality. Miss Hunter doesn't seem to notice, gushing over the prize in your hand.

"Awe, you won that! It's so cute!" She pokes its cheek with her finger, giggling. "I've never been able to win anything from these machines. How many tries did it take you?"

Something flutters in your chest. A feeling you'd only felt when Sylus praised you - pride. You really managed to do something she couldn't? It sounded impossible after seeing her win over and over again without fail.

You hold up a finger. She gapes at you.

"What? It only took you one try?!" She looks at the machines, and all the cute mini plushies within. She frowns, considering something, before pulling out a handful of tokens. "Maybe they made these easier, somehow? Let me try."

-

"Have fun?"

You dangle the toy in front of Mephisto. He stands in your lap, playfully pecking and nipping at it. He's careful not to damage or tear it - he's always such a good bird.

Sylus wraps his arms around you from behind the couch. His chin rests on your shoulder, large hands massaging your sides. He kisses your cheek. "You're smiling."

Your first instinct is to turn away, but he stops you. Fingers grab your chin and turn you to face him instead. Crimson eyes, smug and teasing, meet yours.

You sigh. You have to admit that it was fun, even if you'd love to be stubborn and say it wasn't. Maybe if you hadn't won anything, you wouldn't have to pretend you hated it. Unfortunately, the toy that dangles from your finger is evidence to the contrary.

"She's a menace on those machines," you say, voice low, like it's a secret.

He chuckles. "How many did she get?"

"I lost count."

You glance back at Mephisto and shift the toy to rest in your palm. He grabs it in his beak, cawing around the object in his mouth, and flits off to go put it with his little hoard. Or, well, you thought he would. Instead, he flaps off to his perch and, using his foot and beak together, manages to hang it by its chain on the end of it. They look like a matching set as he fluffs up and settles down to rest

Sylus kisses the corner of your smiling mouth. You feel exposed. How is it possible for something so small to catch your emotions off guard?

"I'm glad you had fun," he whispers sincerely. "If you'd like, we can go together sometime."

"We wouldn't win anything," you tease. You rub your nose against his, drawing out a soft look of love from his eyes.

He shrugs. "Then we'll steal one."

"How criminal. This may be your most dastardly scheme yet."

"Mhm. And I'll need my best man on the job to help me pull it off." He closes the small gap to kiss you. His thumb rubs over the ball of your chin. Another kiss and his hand shifts to your jaw. Another, then to your neck. He draws you in, over and over, languidly savoring you, like you have all the time in the world.

---

Tag List:

@the-golden-jhope @armycaratlover @sylusfluffymeow @cheesemachine44 @nyx2021 @angel-jupiter @thelittlebutton @pikachuzhc @pomegranatepip @cordidy @an-ever-angry-bi @thejysemongko @deusfoundry @that-lost-one

[odinsblog]

Please, just remember to use hand sanitizer afterwards. More helpful advice under the cut.

Among my friends, the questions asked were not the typical moralistic questions of whether or not you should punch Nazis. Apparently, they viewed this less as a moral dilemma and more as a moral imperative. Instead, the questions revolved more around how to punch a Nazi most effectively.

As a martial artist with a special interest in practical self-defense, I decided that I could help tackle some of these; to create a Nazi-punching FAQ, in other words.

Should I wait for the Nazi to punch first?

While some would advocate this as a way to avoid any criminal or civil charges, this is generally a mistake, as this will normally happen only when they outnumber you 6 to 1, because all Nazis are cowards who skulk in the dark like cockroaches.

From a self-defense perspective, it is of paramount importance to seize the initiative. If you allow your opponent to have the initiative, it puts you in a reactive state and at a severe disadvantage.

Preemption is thus greatly preferred and can be rationalized as long as you can articulate why you struck first and why this constituted legal self-defense. A sincere belief that you were under immediate risk of bodily harm normally suffices for this. Why did you feel you were in immediate danger? Because he’s a fucking Nazi, that’s why.

What’s the best way to make the punch count?

Contrary to popular belief, the most effective strikes are rarely punches. Unless you have trained in self-defense and are used to punching things (plenty of no-gloves bag-work, etc), I recommend AGAINST punching with a closed fist. While it can be a very effective strike, it also opens the striker up to injury — breaking the metatarsal bones in the hand is very common, as is damage to the wrist from poor alignment. For this very reason, most martial arts gloves also incorporate wrist-stabilization.

Instead, I would recommend open handed “power bitch-slaps” to get your point across, or better yet, go with a solid elbow. It’s the hardest point on your body so is nearly impervious to injury, and be sure to get your hips into the action for full effect.

How can I throw a punch without looking like I’m “Heil Hitler-ing”?

If you can get close enough, making it look like your “Seig Heil”-ing is an excellent way to make it look like you’re not a threat. I recommend the eyes or throat as targets while striking with a spear-hand technique.

If you’re worried about looking like a Nazi supporter to others standing nearby, make sure your punch is a left-handed one. It’s important to train the off-hand punches too, and this is a great reason why.

A left-hook cannot be confused with an alt-right.

Does the headbutt have a role here?

The head butt is an extremely effective and common technique that is best applied if you are British and/or a “soccer hooligan”.

This technique is also an excellent preemptive strike that I discourage only because it means you have to get even closer to the fucking Nazi to utilize.

What if you’re too short to headbutt the Nazi?

You can crouch slightly and explode up and into the underside of the chin, it’s a personal favorite headbutt of mine and doesn’t require being tall.

I’m short and have weak shoulders. Is it acceptable to kick a Nazi in the bollocks instead?

If you can find them, yes. Be aware that they’re likely to be tiny and withered if they have any at all.

While the groin is indeed a very tender area and a way to immediately get the full and undivided attention of any pussy-grabbing Nazi nearby, be aware that it’s also an area that all boys and men have been accustomed to guarding their entire lives (mostly from other boys and men who think it’s hilarious to hit their “friend” there when they aren’t expecting anything).

It should be viewed as a target of opportunity, but there are often easier ones presented.

How do you make it look accidental?

I recommend a trip and an “accidental” elbow. When you go to apologize and help him up, make sure to accidentally step on something. Preferably his groin, though that might look bad if on camera.

I do highly recommend, once again, to re-stomp the groin as a solid disengagement technique.

I have a multiple part question, just in case I am feeling especially giddy at the opportunity to punch a Nazi. 1) Can I punch more than once? 2) How much is too much? 3) Best technique for throwing multiple punches. 4) When I do get tired, can I rest & then resume punching?

These are all excellent questions, and require multifaceted answers. First of all, punching more than once is primarily a matter of situational awareness. Is the Nazi alone? If he has friends nearby, then the sniper method is best; hit him hard and fast, and leave quickly. See Richard Spencer’s excellent demos for examples of this. The same may apply if there is a local law enforcement presence, as they are unlikely to understand the nuance of the situation.

2) If the Nazi is alone, then punching more than once is more likely to be fully efficacious. How much is too much? Well, if he renounces his terrible worldview and makes a sincere pledge to turn his life around, you should probably stop.

3) The best techniques for throwing multiple punches? To be honest, flurries of punches are far more likely to result in abrasions, breaking your hand or damaging your wrist than a single shot would. If you can obtain a mounted position such as in MMA, you’d be advised to rain down elbows instead. If you can’t maintain a mount and still feel the need for multiple strikes, I recommend using a force multiplier. This can be any common object within easy reach. A protest sign, a rock, another Nazi… you get the idea.

4) Make sure to retain situational awareness before attempting this. It’s probably best to just go home by now, especially if there’s anyone nearby who may have misinterpreted your discussion and contacted law enforcement.

The fact that I am German makes me uniquely qualified for Nazi punching, since it potentially would confuse the to-be-punched Nazi that someone from the Vaterland would attempt to rearrange their facial structures. What’s the best way to take advantage of this?

Get close, speak German, click your heels in the Prussian manner as, with a slight bow, you bring your forehead down on the bridge of his nose. It could be an accident.

Okay, I’m done punching this Nazi. What’s the best way to disengage without risking a counterattack?

Well, if he’s still conscious, I’d utilize the advice of Master Ken, and always re-stomp the groin. If he’s unconscious, the same advice applies.

(source)

[dalishious]

Hi, hope you're doing well!

I had to unfollow you/block a lpt of tags for a while until I beat datv but I'm so happy to be back. You're one of the first da blogs I followed, and I see you've gotten a lot of argumentative people at the moment, but I just want to say I think that you're great, and I appreciate the candid way you answer people.

Just a quick question, you said Taash's rivaini route had a lot of bullshit? I've just beaten the game for the first time and that was the route I chose so I was wondering if you could elaborate?

Thank you!

Disclaimer: A lot of this is written from a personal place. In no way am I trying to discredit anyone who feels differently. That even includes Trick Weekes, when it comes to the gender stuff at least. And please keep hatred of Taash out of this post; as I say in the end, I do still really enjoy Taash as a character!

The player first meets Taash when still identifying as a woman. However, Taash soon comes to realize they are not a woman; they are non-binary. While most of this answer will be quite critical of Taash’s story, there are positives I would like to acknowledge first. For example, I do think that the dialogue options surrounding the acceptance of Taash’s gender is fairly good. I like that you can be encouraging but not pushy about them exploring their identity further, when the topic first comes up. If you play as a non-binary character yourself, you are able to relate to Taash on a personal level, and provide them with a sense of kinship outside that which they seek from the Shadow Dragons, (who apparently double as both abolitionists and queer support group?) The game makes it clear that Taash’s gender is not just player-reactive; if the player chooses to avoid Taash’s personal questline, Taash still later on announces they are non-binary and use they/them pronouns now, with a game notification letting you know they went and embraced that with the help of Neve and Harding. And while some people have criticized the use of terms like non-binary as “not being fantasy enough” for their tastes, I personally think it’s perfectly fine to be overt like that, instead of dancing around the topic. I saw a post on a recommended Facebook page from some cis person who said they learned a lot about gender diversity because the game went out of the way to be so blatantly inclusive. Yes, there are a moments I can agree are kind of cringe, but lord knows there’s plenty of cringe in other regards as well with the writing, so it’s not like it’s exclusive to Taash’s gender writing. Overall, I think it’s a good exploration about someone stepping outside of a binary view of gender, except for one glaring problem: It is so very, very, white.

Trick Weekes, Taash’s writer, is non-binary themself, but they are also a settler living in the colonial project known as Canada. And that has very clearly influenced their perspective on how they think gender and culture works. With Taash’s writing for the Rivaini route, Weekes paints a picture that their gender journey must come at the sacrifice of their cultural identity, as if the two must be distinctive, separate things. What’s worse, is how binary the cultural identity aspect to Taash’s story is; ironic for a character who is supposed to be about stepping outside a box like that!

Not once, not twice, but three times, Rook is forced to choose to convince Taash if they should be Rivaini or Qunari. The first time, there is an option to say “why not both?” But that option is not present the second or third time the dialogue prompt comes up. The one that hurt me the most is when Taash is clearly having a breakdown over who they want to be vs. who they were raised to be, and the only way to try and console them is to make them pick a singular thing to identify as.

I also think it was a hugely missed opportunity, in choosing to have a bunch of Tevinter humans be Taash’s only source of learning about gender diversity. We know from codex entries that they talk to the Shadow Dragons about that topic, but apparently no one else? Why not have Taash consult a Rivaini Seer for advice, or hell, how about adding more qunari characters who aren’t just standard brutes to mash buttons against in a fight? So, in limiting the scope of this knowledge to just Tevinter humans, Taash is only getting more reinforcement that gender comes before any other cultural identity.

As a Two-Spirit person, I cannot stress enough that gender and culture do not exist in two separate vacuums. They can overlap and/or can be essentially under the same umbrella. So, when Weekes writes about Taash struggling with cultural identity and gender identity at the same time, I can understand that feeling so well. But I cannot understand the written approach Weekes takes. The message I received was “your gender is more important than your culture.” Which again, I must stress is such a white colonial idea of queerness.

I do really like Taash despite these shortcomings from Weekes, though. Just like how I really like Sera despite Kristjanson’s bullshit in Inquisition. I’m not about to hate on a character just because there are certain parts of their writing that I think should have been handled better, when there are more parts that are really fun about Taash. They are so refreshingly autistic-coded in a way that doesn’t punish them for being so, for example.

[fandom-susceptible]

100% agree, but addition: it's not even just that he killed Ibis.

Terry knows exactly what sort of person Claudia is. He's totally fine with letting her kill all sorts of magical creatures for her spells. He even assists her with finding them and takes an interest in how they work. I truly think his reaction to killing Ibis was because he's never killed another elf before, not because he has a moral objection to killing things for power.

Plus, the thing is . . . it goes deeper than that. Claudia was shown being perfectly honest with him about everything from the beginning - to the point that it makes her uncomfortable in Season 7 when Aaravos begins to urge her to lie to him. She's had the plot of eliminating the elves and dragons ever since season 3; that didn't go away after Viren died. She explicitly was trying to get him back so they could then go take revenge on everyone. It's not even about some twisted "defending their kingdom" anymore, she's fully just planning on vengeful genocide.

And Terry's fine with that.

He only balks when it's Aaravos doing it. As long as Claudia was acting of her own volition, he was fine with the murder, with the genocide, with the bloody vengeance she wanted on the world. Not just fine with it, actively supportive of it!

His softer side that everyone focuses on highly distracts from how dark he really is as a person. Legitimately, right up until he finally left her, I was half-convinced he wasn't even real. One of my close friends (who isn't on tumblr) came up with the theory that he's a magical figment of Claudia's imagination given form. Even the "true of heart" plot didn't disprove it to me; he's what remains of her childhood innocence, then. That theory only sort of breaks apart after he leaves her - but then again, the Season 7 "loss of innocence" meta plot was heavy handed, and we've seen with things like Ava and the shadowhawk arrows that plenty of enchantments, once cast, are just cast. The mage doesn't need to actively maintain them.

So I'm still not fully convinced Terry is even a real elf.

If he is, we can't excuse how fucked up he is underneath the nice facade. I have the same problems with him as I had with Claudia in the early seasons; their cuteness and sweetheart surface is distracting people from how truly dark they are.

Claudia was always going to surpass Viren as the villain of this show. We saw early on that Viren is a coward. Viren hesitates. Claudia doesn't. The second Aaravos got access to her instead of Viren, the old man was getting tossed aside like a dirty rag, even before we knew about Leola.

I lowkey think that Terry is a similar character. He seems like a lighthearted character now, especially since that "Zuko here" scene and attempt at a redemption arc, but I think when it comes down to it, his priority is Claudia and making her happy. I don't think he gives a flying fuck what happens to the rest of the world. Why he's so dedicated to her and cares so little about everything else, I don't really know. It could be just pent up resentment for the world that rejected his identity as a man, but he doesn't come across as projecting that particular anger at the entire world, just at his home village somewhere in the Uncharted Forest. Or it could be he has his own ulterior motives and he, like early seasons Claudia, has convinced himself he's true and right and therefore he has no guilt on his conscience, leading to spells perceiving him as having a "true heart". Most adults have something in their past they regret, even if it's small. Maybe Terry just doesn't, until for some reason Aaravos changed the game for him.

I don't know. I don't think I'll ever trust Terrestrius, but it will be interesting to see how the show takes him if Netflix lets us have a third arc.

"Terry is pure of heart, it is what allows him to see the map"

Ibis from the afterlife. A.K.A the guy he murdered:

[lazysoulwriter]

Fences & Flowers. - Joel Miller.

Summary: (Y/N) moves to her late grandparents' farmhouse, seeking solace from the overwhelming pace of city life. Determined to transform the land into a flourishing farm, she is met with unexpected curiosity from her neighbor, Joel Miller. Their first encounter is anything but smooth, filled with teasing remarks and a palpable tension. But when Joel returns to make amends, their dynamic takes an unexpected turn—one that leaves them both questioning the sparks between them.

no outbreak.

The house stood at the heart of the land, a quiet, sprawling estate that had been in her family for generations. (Y/N) ran her fingers over the worn wooden railing of the porch, feeling the age of the place, the weight of its history. It was hers now. All of it—the fields stretching beyond the horizon, the small grove of trees lining the dirt path, the barn standing stubbornly against time.

She inhaled deeply, letting the scent of earth and open air settle into her lungs. This was why she came here. To escape. To breathe. To build something that was hers.

The transition hadn’t been easy. Life in the city had been suffocating, the constant noise, the endless pressure of expectations she no longer cared to meet. Here, she would set her own pace. Here, she would make her own rules.

Her first order of business had been tending to the few animals left under the care of an old farmhand who had loyally remained despite the years of vacancy. But today, she had something different in mind. The truck she’d driven up in still held boxes of belongings, but nestled among them were the delicate seedlings and flowers she’d brought with her. She wanted color. She wanted life.

Digging her hands into the rich soil, she let the earth crumble between her fingers before carefully pressing down around the base of a small cluster of lavender. It felt good to work with her hands.

She was so focused on the task that she didn’t notice the figure approaching until a shadow loomed over her.

“You know, that’s not how we do things around here.”

Her head snapped up, startled. The man standing in front of her was tall, broad, with streaks of gray running through his dark hair. His arms were crossed over his chest, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.

“Excuse me?” she asked, wiping the dirt from her hands onto her jeans before standing up.

Joel Miller had seen plenty of newcomers in his time, but none quite like her. She was young—too young, maybe, to be taking on a farm this size alone. And she was beautiful. Not in the delicate, untouchable way, but in a way that made him pause, made something unfamiliar settle in his chest.

“I mean, fancy little plants like those don’t stand much of a chance out here,” he continued, nodding towards the flowers she was planting. “Might as well be settin’ up a tea party for the deer.”

(Y/N) narrowed her eyes. “Well, lucky for me, I’m not taking farming advice from the first cowboy who wanders onto my land.”

Joel let out a short laugh. “Cowboy? Darlin’, I’m your neighbor.”

Her gaze flicked toward the fence line separating their properties. Of course. She’d seen his place in the distance, had noticed the way it was well-kept, the livestock thriving.

“Great. And my neighbor thinks I’m incompetent.”

“I didn’t say that,” Joel replied, the amusement in his voice not quite masking the interest beneath. “I just don’t see many city folks stickin’ around once they realize this ain’t all sunsets and slow mornings.”

She bristled. “I’m not from the city.”

“Really?” His tone was skeptical. “You just scream ‘never fixed a fence in your life.’”

She crossed her arms. “And you scream ‘grumpy old man with too many opinions.’”

That made him grin, a real one this time. “Fair enough.” He took a step back, nodding toward her work. “Just don’t say I didn’t warn ya when all them flowers disappear overnight.”

He turned, heading back toward his truck parked by the fence. (Y/N) exhaled sharply, watching him go. Asshole. A ridiculously handsome asshole, but still.

The next morning, she was back in the dirt, determined to finish planting, when she heard the familiar sound of boots approaching.

“Brought somethin’,” Joel announced.

She looked up, eyes narrowing as she spotted him holding out a small roll of wire.

“What’s this?”

“Fencing. For your flowers,” he said, as if it were obvious. “Figured I’d save you the heartbreak.”

(Y/N) stared at him, caught somewhere between annoyance and… something else. He had that same easy smirk, but there was an almost shy quality to the way he scratched the back of his neck, as if uncomfortable with the act of offering help.

She took the roll from his hands, her fingers brushing against his for the briefest moment. A warmth spread through her, unexpected and uninvited.

“Thanks,” she muttered.

Joel didn’t move. He glanced down at her, at the dirt smudges on her cheeks, the way her hair was falling from the loose ponytail she’d tied up in a hurry.

“Why flowers?” he asked suddenly.

(Y/N) blinked at him. “What?”

“You’re startin’ a farm, right?” He motioned toward the land behind her. “Why go through all this trouble for somethin’ that ain’t gonna feed you?”

She looked at the lavender, the small pops of color in the rich soil. “Because it makes me happy.”

Joel didn’t have a response to that. Instead, he let his gaze linger on her face a second too long, his weight shifting slightly forward.

For a fleeting moment, it felt like something was pulling them closer, like the distance between them wasn’t distance at all.

His eyes flickered to her lips.

(Y/N) sucked in a breath, suddenly hyper-aware of how close he was, of the way the air between them had thickened. Her heart pounded against her ribs.

And then—

He cleared his throat, stepping back like he’d just caught himself doing something stupid.

“Well,” he said, rubbing a hand over his jaw. “Don’t let me keep you from your… flowers.”

(Y/N) exhaled, forcing a nod, as if that moment hadn’t just changed something between them.

“See you around, cowboy.”

Joel scoffed but didn’t correct her this time. Instead, he shot her one last glance before turning away, his hands shoved into his pockets.

She watched him go, fingers tightening around the fencing wire in her hands, pulse still unsteady.

Oh, she was in trouble.

[lillified]

Greetings ! I just watched your animatic on Youtube and as a 2D animation student who wants to do storyboard/animatics as her job, this is the best thing I have ever seen. I don't know how I'll get to this but seeing your work just made me incredibly happy and hopeful. Kudos from a new fan !

thank you, this is a lovely message to receive! I really love storyboarding and direction in general, it’s an extremely understated but powerful part of film and all sequential media and I could talk for hours about it. I’m super grateful that I’ve been able to do it professionally!

that said, ETD isnt a great example of a production storyboard—because the animatic is the finished product, it’s a lot more polished in places than a production storyboard should be, and it’s obviously a lot more animated. There are other pros out there who do clean looking indie projects, but I hope I didn’t give the impression that clean and pretty or more frames equals a better board.

There are plenty of more mundane, fundamental areas I’ve found that could be improved with the finished project, in hindsight… that said, it was a great learning experience, and I think it was worth it to push my ability to “finish” a big project like that! even just planning out a piece like that is a good way to develop your creative muscles and push you outside of your comfort zone, if you’re used to working with other people’s scripts.

[randomfoggytiger]

Tiger, don't deny what was obvious: they took advantage of the characters to make out all the time. No fictional couple was as effusive in physical contact as they were. And that's because they didn't get along - imagine if they did… even with their real-life partners they weren't as affectionate and, of course, their partners didn't like it - it was nitid that Gillian's husband was uncomfortable, and then Tea, who was an actress and disguised it better, but wasn't very comfortable either. And the current partners of the two I'm sure also prefer their interactions to be every ten years and, better still, remotely. The level of "clinginess" with the other colleagues in the series, doesn't reach 10% of what they had with each other - Gillian, by the way, was very restrained, David who was the most clownish. I don't think they've had any off-screen involvement and never will, but to deny and minimize the chemistry and absurd sexual tension they have is impossible, damn! It's no wonder that they were one of the only pairs that to this day have sparked comments about whether or not they're together. Patrick and Lisbon? Castle and Beckett? Starbuck and Apollo? Bones and Booth? Olivia and Peter? None of them made it. Why are you always so reluctant to admit it?

Let me put it this way:

She also suggested Gillian be naked "cheek-to-cheek" with her newly-wed husband; and by all accounts got along with GA quite well! :DD There's no evidence otherwise, and plenty of evidence for.

Further, DD and GA themselves didn't see the big deal in Mulder or Scully's kiss, or even the appeal of their chemistry until years later (with the benefit of hindsight.) It was just, as they both stated many times, work to them. At best, friends; at worst, frosty coworkers. And having seen their bts interactions and outtakes (yes, FTF kiss included), their behavior matches that thought. Gillian's not the only person David felt up, and vice versa.

Don't know about GA's ex, but Gillian's said she's a difficult person to live with-- I think she and PM prefer to keep separate houses to this day, right? And that's not a knock on her, of course. (I think David, pre-Tea, said the same; and likewise for him.) Just an acknowledgement that, per her own words, her first marriage was rushed into and rocky because her strong personality misaligned with her first husband's. But it also didn't align well enough with David to tempt either to pursue a deeper relationship.

"Why are you always so reluctant to admit it?" Oh, I'm not. XDDD They had/have great chemistry, but they're not the only ones. If you look back to Old Hollywood, there are plenty of examples; and if you interview any actress, then and now, they'll all state that everyone always assumes they're in bed with or dating their costars. Lastly... maybe I'm too cynical, but standing across from another person reading the same lines five to six times in a row, breaking for lunch, and doing it again with lunch breath, day-in-and-out, five-to-six days a week, nine-to-ten months a year does not a romance usually further. Especially when neither is in the habit of communicating.

Everything must be taken in context: the idea that they were both drawn to each other but held apart by, *gasp*, forces against their will... doesn't add up, particularly when DD and GA had a window of opportunity here or there to act on if they wanted. They didn't; to this day, they don't really know each other well.

Also: "Gillian, by the way, was very restrained, David who was the most clownish"... I disagree. Combine the fact that she affectionately grapples onto others openly (example here) with the admittance that that she relied on DD to teach her the ropes in Season 1 (per her own words) and with our knowledge that she's naturally shy, and we can collect a few data points (then verify with footage from their red carpet events): David does the same thing he always does-- hand at back, arm on shoulder, head-tilt to the side, etc.-- because he doesn't change; and GA does what she always does-- lean in, reach out, tease, let him lean in so she can hear him (he's tall)-- because she doesn't change.

That's just who she is-- physically effusive-- and just who he is-- physically reassuring. It made for great tv... but, to be honest, nobody really talks about either of them anymore off of Tumblr (and maybe Twitter) except to remember/rewatch the "good old days" fondly or hope to see them again in some new MOTW or mytharc episode.

TLDR: they had fantastic, very rare chemistry; but they alone weren't the only tv/movie couples to be talked about (especially after the relationship resolved on-screen.) DD, GA, Tea, etc. are built different. And sometimes/most often, chemistry isn't all that will make a relationship work-- in my humble opinion, that's merely a fraction of the whole. :D

[teaguehq]

There's no doubt in my mind you made Calgary all the better, even if it's a beautiful city on its own. It was just better for having you there with me, not to mention we kept each other warm despite all the cold! And we found plenty of fun things to do together, thankfully. You know I'll always attend your premieres with you, and of course cheer you on in your projects! I'm already so excited for seeing Fantastic Four now that there's a trailer, and I know you'll have done an incredible job in that. Though that aside, you looked so handsome in the trailer too - no wonder they chose you for Johnny Storm when you're already hot and it's entirely believable you can set a fire all on your own! I know you've got promo coming up, so I'm just happy I'm not working for the moment and can travel around with you for it all. I'm so happy you liked being in Florida with me, and happier that you got the chance to visit and meet my parents. Though sorry about all their questions and their asking so many. You're only the second person I've ever brought home, so I know they were a little curious, if anything. Though it's no surprise to me that they like you! I know what you mean when I already miss Florida's warmth myself, though just means we'll have to go on a vacation soon. I love that you want to match costumes for Halloween, and you know I'd be all for planning that! Maybe the big costumes this year will be the Fantastic Four though, so I hope you're ready for that. Well, I'll say you don't have to worry about losing me, because I'm here as long as you'd like me to be. But I know I'd be lost without you too, so that feeling is definitely mutual, love. In that case, you can have me in your arms as much as you'd like, just putting that out there. You want to take me somewhere special? Now I'm wondering what you have in mind, though it's likely I'd like any date you take me on. Well, I had to show you some of my hangouts while we were there in Tampa, including some places that play live music since the guys and I have had gigs there before! I'm happy we had another chance to dip into the hot springs before my filming ended, since I did have the best time there with you. I had a feeling, though it's mutual since I can't ever get enough of you. And well, since you didn't know what I was planning for your birthday at the time, you know I had a lot more than just the hot springs on my mind for a post-filming celebration. Plus having a hot tub handy and enjoying it with you certainly felt like a great vacation. I can't help it since every time I think about being all yours, it just makes me smile so much. I'm not even close to being sick of knitted items, especially since they're made with your own hands. At least we don't have to miss each other for a little while, right? I know, and neither of us wants to hurt Bach's feelings, so better we let him believe he's the best cuddler. A friend for Bach? Will it be another dog just as big as Bach, or did you have something else in mind? I'm excited for visiting more Catacomb entrances since it seems like such a secret thing! I'll always protect you, never have to worry about that. It's a good thing you like it when I blush, since you make me blush so often! I don't know that I'll always be the sexiest of us when I think you are, without question. Now that filming's over, breaking in both our places will be an easier goal! Maybe after you're all finished with promo. Of course, and I love London too, so it's certainly not like you'd have to pull my arm if you wanted to visit there. And I'm happy being where you are too, so honestly, that sounds perfect to me.

Well, I want to show you all of my favorite places, and especially those we can dance! I'm smiling hearing you say that you love cooking with me, and whether it's in cooking classes or at one of our places, I know we'd have a great time and learn to make something new. I'm excited to fill up those cooking books too! Bentley definitely liked you, though I had no doubts at all that he would! I know the sanctuary appreciated the donation so much, and at least we got to interact with some of the other animals while we were helping feed them! You absolutely have a kind heart, love. I knew my parents would end up liking you, and I think they're so happy they've met you since I talk about you so much! I'm just telling the truth, you're amazing! Though you're making me blush saying I'm the amazing one. Do you really think your family will like me? Because I hope so! I'm all for visiting London and seeing them whenever you'd like to. It's a good thing I make you smile and make you happy then, since that's a reason for them to like me. You're welcome for the camping spot, and I knew you'd enjoy seeing the cattle and being on the ranch. Maybe cows are just like giant puppies around you, since they clearly wanted your affections! Turkey will be a lot of fun, although you know I'm all for any holidays with you. And we can spoil each other everywhere we go, no question on that. Now that I'm not working, you can wake me up that way as much as you'd like, especially since most days, we don't have an early call time. Or yet, I should say, since I know you have some promo coming up. Between those and the morning showers, I'm definitely becoming more a fan of mornings. No, you didn't scare me off at all, Joseph, and if anything, it means a lot to me that you're thinking about us in future terms. And I love you, and I'm so happy you feel the same way about me. Not to mention I feel so incredibly lucky for it, too. I want that with you too, living together at some point and getting married when the timing feels right for it. Makes me curious if you've thought of where we should live, like where you'd want a place together. I do love you, Joseph, and it makes me smile that I can say it now without holding back. Nothing I can say would scare you? Not that I'd test that theory, though saying I love you out loud was the scariest thing up until now! And I do want forever with you, and honestly, it makes my heart race just saying that out loud too, not to mention knowing you want the same thing. I'll kiss you as much as you'd like, that's a fact! well, no surprise when you linger on my mind in general, but I wouldn't have it any other way. I absolutely loved the decorations and the red theme, and well, I feel like I showed just how much I loved it with including it as part of the photo album I gave you! It just meant the world to me since no one's ever done that for me before. Christmas and New Year's with you was incredible, and it was fun getting to spend both of them in New York. I bet you'll end up playing the mandolin beautifully too, and we'll have to start in on the lessons soon! I really did love your gifts, and that necklace is honestly my new favorite. Plus we'll definitely have to plan the cruise soon since it'll be a lot of fun! The kiss in Time's Square was so memorable, and well, I don't doubt in the least that all our New Year's kisses will be that memorable, too. I'm happy you liked the idea of Devonian Gardens before we had to leave, albeit a week earlier than I'd said in honor of your birthday! I have a feeling you liked it, but did you enjoy the cabin I rented for that week along with your other birthday gifs? It was difficult to keep from you, I can say that! And well, you're stuck with me since I don't have to film anything for now, so I can take care of you while you're having to work. | @josephafq

i feel like it's easy to appreciate calgary more because i'm here with you, yeah? but you're right -- aside from the cold, it's a nice city and we've really had a great time and have done some fun things together! and you know i feel the same way about you, love, that anything is more fun with you at my side. i'm glad you love attending my premieres, because i love having you on my arm so much, and it means the world that you're so supportive. you're making me blush a little right now saying that, and i'm glad you think it ends up being special, love. i'm glad it might be a little bit before i work again, so i get to spend as much time with you as possible. and i was very glad for your time off for the holidays as well, because i loved getting to go to flordia with you! the warm weather there was gorgeous, and i almost hated to leave to have to go back to the cold! i like the idea of dressing up in halloween costumes that are popular at that time -- i'm sure we can have a lot of fun with that, i just know i want to match with you! i'm glad to put your mind at ease, love, but i'll admit i have those same kind of worries too, you know? i know that i would be lost without you, so i'll do anything to make sure i don't lose you. i'm glad being in my arms is so comforting, love, and i love having you in my arms so lucky that, yeah? i love your clinginess, honestly, and love that you love mine too! i have been thinking about new dates to plan, i really want to take you some place special that just shows you how much you mean to me. and i loved the something fun you had planned while in tampa, i had a very good time and you know you're the most thoughtful man on the planet, right? oh, very much so, because i love the hot springs there so much and i love going to them with you! i'm glad we'll get to visit them again before your filming is over! and i love recreating everything we've done there together as well, i can't get enough of you, though i'm sure you already know that, yeah? i'm glad that you're on board with staying at the hot springs a little longer so we can truly take advantage of them, and you're right, it would be the perfect post-filming celebration! i'm glad you always love hot tubs with me, love, and we've had a lot of fun in them, haven't we? i love hearing that i made you blush by saying that, but it's the truth, the best feeling is knowing that you're all mine, and it's safe to say that i love being all yours, love. i mean, as long as you're not sick of my knitted items, i'll make a ton more for you! i'm glad that you always want to be near me, like i do you, and i miss you so much when we're apart. i especially miss having you in my arms! it's good that we don't let bach know that we like each other's cuddles better than his, it might hurt his feelings. though speaking of bach, i've been wondering, do you think he looks lonely? because i was wondering if maybe we should get him a friend. i'll reach out to jamie and let him know that we'd like to meet up with them and visit some secret catacomb entrances, he'll be shocked that i'm asking! and thank you for saying you'll always hold my hand, love. it's my favorite when you blush, i hope you know that. but i really do think you're the sexiest, part of why i can't keep my hands off you, love. plus, i'm glad you think i'm so sexy and all, but you'll always be the sexiest of us. i love kissing you every morning too, love, it really is the best way to start the day. i love sending you off to set with plenty of kisses! i'm looking forward to breaking in your place a little more in new york as well, and of course we've still got some places in my apartment as well that we need to break in! yes, wherever you are, i'm happy to be right alongside you! and i'm glad that's mutual, love, and thank you for saying you'll always be willing to visit london whenever i'm missing it. though i've been feeling good, lately and just happy being where you are.

it's sweet that you wanted to take me to one of your favorite spots in new york -- and honestly, the dancing with you was the best part of the night! i'm glad you're all for taking more cooking classes, love, and i know we'll have a fun time with cooking new things and filling up those books. plus, i just really love cooking with you, you know? it's sweet! it was so fun getting to meet bentley, and i have a feeling he liked me, do you think he did? and i'm glad that i was able to donate a little something to the sanctuary, as well as help out with some things while we were there too. though you're making me blush saying i have a kind heart. it was a little scary meeting your parents, i'll admit, but i am so happy they ended up liking me. and now you're really making me blush saying your'e with someone who is as amazing as i am, when you're the amazing one, love! once you're done filming, we'll head to london for a little bit so you can meet my family -- and they really are going to love you. anyone that makes me smile as much as you do and makes me happy as you do, they're going to love. and thank you for taking me to such a great camping place, i loved it so much, and i had fun seeing the cattle. also, i didn't realize that cows could be like giant puppies, you know? i'm glad you're all for going to turkey, love, and that you're as excited as i am about all the holidays that we've got planned. i love the idea of seeing the world with you, love, and can't wait to spoil you at every place we go, as well as have you spoil me! i'm also very happy i can wake you up in the way i like as many times as i'd like, given it's my favorite way to help you start the day! well, it's tied with our morning showers because i love them with you and agree that i'm liking mornings better as well. first let me say that i'm glad i didn't scare you off, because i was really worried. but yeah, i do love you, i love you a whole lot and i've wanted to tell you for a while now. and i do think about us living together and getting married at some point -- which is a little scary because you're right they are big things to say, but i wanted you to know that i'm thinking that, and that i want that with you. and you love me too? just getting really emotional with you saying that i'll have you know, and it makes me feel better you've known for a while too. nothing you could say would ever scare me though, just putting that out there, alright? god, i'm so glad that you want forever with me too, owen, i can't even put into words how that makes me feel. and you're right, neither of us have any reason to be scared since we're on the same page. you'll kiss me all the time? lucky me! oh, i really will always enjoy those favors, love, and i'm glad they tend to linger in your mind as well, that makes me feel very good. it makes me so happy that you loved all the decorations i had done at my place, love, and of course i had to do a red theme since it's your favorite color after all! i'm glad our christmas together was a good one, same with our new years! i can't wait to start mandolin lessons with you, love, i'm really excited and hope i end up playing it decently! i'm glad you feel spoiled by my gifts though, love, and it makes me smile you're never taking off that necklace! plus, i love that you're excited about the cruise because i know we're going to have so much fun on that ship! oh, i loved kissing you in times square as well, i'm so glad you were my new years kiss, and look forward to you always being my new years kiss. and going back to devonian gardens before we leave calgary sounds like a brilliant idea, love. i'm pretty happy you're stuck with me for a while, honestly. and exactly, i'm happy when we can take care of each other, i love taking care of you. and you always make me feel happy and safe, there's no doubt about that. || @teaguehq

[fuck-customers]

We have a new hire at work (relatively new, she's been here about 3 months and is still the newest) and and I think the phrase is she was hired for her "soft skills," she's super friendly, nice, easy to get along with, everyone really liked her at first but the problem is she doesn't do her job. At all. She just uses the equipment herself or sits and plays on her phone while the rest of us are fighting for our lives trying to help customers, answer the phones, and keep up with the paperwork.

She was supposed to help manage the workload, but not only does she not help, she adds to it because we have to take time to train her on tasks she then proceeds to totally ignore unless you specifically say "answer that call" or "register that customer," then she'll do the task exactly once and never again. And none of us are managers so we'll get yelled at for bossing her around if we tell her what to do every time. This has happened in the past, we are literally not allowed to tell anyone else to do tasks, only how to do it or we get reprimanded if a boss hears.

Every single member of our department and some people outside our department have noticed and commented that she's friendly but she doesn't do anything even when calls are going to voicemail and customers are waiting, and I know at least two people in the department have submitted official complaints that she's getting paid for not working and it's tanking our whole department's numbers.

Yesterday she was actually talking to a customer for once (while using the equipment herself) and she said "yeah I'm new but I really like it, everyone is super nice, like really really nice" and now I'm torn between being impressed that no one's been mean to her despite our intense and justified frustration, and feeling awkward that she thinks we're so friendly when actually everyone is furious at her and complaining about her behind her back and wishing she hadn't been hired.

I'd feel better about the whole situation if she was snobby or rude about it, but she's not so I just feel kind of guilty like we're being gossipy high school bullies or something. But we're not! Nobody hates her personally! We're just drowning in work and want her to do what she was hired to do instead of being dead weight!

I heard through the grapevine management's put a trace on her employee account after the most recent complaint was filed and they are going to compare her completed tasks against tasks that went undone during time she has no logged activity for the next week (I feel like they should already have that information though? Every single thing you do including picking up the phone gets logged to your employee ID. She's here 3 months. There should already be plenty of data?) and if they determine she actually isn't working (she's not) they'll "take action," whatever that means.

I'll feel bad for her if she gets fired because she seems genuinely unaware there's a problem, but come on. It's been months. You've been trained. If everyone else is running around like crazy and clearly stressed out, and you're sitting there playing on your phone not doing anything, shouldn't you be at least a LITTLE aware you should be trying to help out with what you were hired to do, and that people will notice and get irritated if you don't?

Posted by admin Rodney

[johannestevans]

genuinely don't understand many other self-published fiction people's approach to marketing, which seems to take its cues from like. people who sell self-help books, or like. fucking do drop shipping

your goal is to find the people who like work like yours and connect them with it.

i think it's really difficult for people to envisage this because they're just poisoned by commercialism & capitalism as exists today, where every company is basically trying to strongarm, manipulate, and trick every single person in the world into buying their product

it's not just stupid and impossible from a marketing perspective, even for whatever garbage they might be shilling, but it's particularly misguided to do for a piece of fucking art or entertainment

and part of it i suppose is just like. a lack of identity but also a desperate fear of rejection

in order to meaningfully think about who will like, love, identify with, crave, and otherwise want to engage with your work, you have to meaningfully think about the people who won't

and that's scary bc a lot of people want to be vulnerable by creating art but don't want to be perceived or judged

and certainly don't want to be rejected, or receive negative reviews, or have people say "egh, it's not my thing", as if that's going to be the immediate death knell on their career

but it's just like. the thing of "i must try to make everyone in the world buy my book" will lead to MORE rejection

idk man. who are you? what's your work, like, about, at the core of it? what are the problems in it? what's the pathos, the core tragedy or core comedy, the meaning? what makes it entertaining? what makes it fun, or miserable, or horrifying? why did you write it? that's why people will read it

what's funny is that i talk to straight people all the time who can't do this, and they think that the way i do it is just by being like. hey boys, i'm a homosexual crippled jew, and my work is about that. and then i sell my books to my fellow disabled gay jews and such

which, sure, a bit

but what my work is actually about is like. trauma and trauma recovery. making peace with the many limits of your body and your relationships, and the limitations placed on you by your scars or your circumstances. fucked up monster sex, which is itself radical acceptance of the horror of our bodies

a lot of gayjew cripples and trans folk identify with that shit because… you know. of fucking course

but a lot of other people do as well, my work is in many ways informed by my identity, but the core themes aren't

many people DON'T like my work bc it's not plotted or structured traditionally

"what was the point?" many disappointed readers ask. "there's no actual STORY here," many complain. "nothing happens," many understandably grumble.

any jew or homosexual will tell you - there's no story. there's just suffering, and then you try to make it better, and then there's more suffering.

but you try to make it better, and it gets a bit better. you take your painkillers, you put balm on the wound. you fall down - maybe someone pushes you down. doesn't matter. get up again.

and for a lot of people, that's fucking dull as shit. where's the adventure? where's the fucking stakes?

and that's fine. there's plenty of books written for those people, they're just not written by me. i'm too busy doing my thing. and what i'm also too busy doing is selling my work to people who actually WANT it, rather than trying to trick people into buying it who won't.

part of the horror of meaningfully looking at your work and going, "okay, who is this for, and who is it NOT for?" is like. not just accepting your limitations, but also having genuine faith in your work. some people won't like it, but some people will fucking adore it. and you have to lean into it

and mostly stop paying for fucking facebook ads. jesus wept. what's wrong with you.

[rebelliousstories]

Puppy Love

ValenFics

Relationship: James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes x Reader

Fandom: Marvel

Request: No

Warnings: Fluff

Word Count: 861

Main Masterlist: Here

Marvel Masterlist: Here

Summary: Bucky was a skirt chaser in the 40’s; this is just a fact. Bet you never heard about this tale from the era though.

Consider Donating: Here

1942

You would think that someone as smooth and cool as Bucky would have trouble getting a date. He had been with plenty of dames, charmed dozens of ladies. So why was he having such a hard time with this one girl?

This one girl in question; Rebecca’s totally swinging friend. There was a major problem with it too. Rebecca refused to help him land a date with her because she was her friend. Any time she would come by their apartment, he tried to be there to welcome her in.

Sometimes he thought that she was interested in him. If Bucky let her into the apartment to hang out with Rebecca, she would brush her hand across his chest as she passed. When he would walk her and Rebecca to the door after they were done, she would press a kiss to his cheek.

James would offer to walk her home, talking the entire four blocks back. If he saw her in town, he would offer to hold her shopping, or walk her around. Bucky would just so happen to find out her shift at the diner that she worked at and would bring her flowers on her birthday.

And each time, he thought that this might be his chance. This might be the time where he could ask her out. But then, the other instances happen. She would ignore him when she came in, going straight to Rebecca’s room and promptly shutting the door. Other times, if he offered to walk with her and hold her shopping, she told him that she was just about to head home anyways, or that she really did not have much to carry.

It was these times Bucky questioned whether or not she was as into him as he was into her. Because each time that he thought she was, and was about to ask her on a date, something would happen to disparage that. He just could not take it much more. Which is why he was currently on his way to her apartment that he had walked her home to a hundred times before with flowers in his hands, and an open heart.

Knocking on the door, Barnes waited patiently for it to open. Instead of her, it was her dad. A big military man that stood eye to eye with the boy. As steady as he could, Bucky started. “Hello, sir. My name is James “Bucky” Barnes. Is your daughter home?”

“What if she is? What do you want?” The squinting of the father’s eyes, Bucky had come to know with his experience, was rarely a good sign.

“Well, um… I want to take her out on a date, sir.” He stated, subconsciously straightening his back, and pushing his shoulder behind him.

“You’re the Rebeccas’s older brother, right?” He said it like he was interrogating him.

“Yes sir.” Bucky stated, feeling the heat a bit.

“Daddy, what’s going on?” Her sweet voice drifted into the room. Coming out from her bedroom, she wore a red button down top with cap sleeves, and a matching red skirt. Her cardigan on top was black, but covered in red and pink hearts knitted throughout. Safe to say, Bucky was glad her father spoke first because he was speechless.

“This young man has come to ask you on a date.”

“Bucky?” She asked, finally noticing who was standing there.

Shaking his head, James cleared his thoughts. “I was hoping that I might be able to take you for a walk through the park, maybe some ice cream. I’m aware it’s too short of notice for the dance hall tonight but I figured, this would be the next best thing.”

As she walked closer, he could smell her perfume more clearly. It was such a beautifully clean scent, with just the barest hint of vanilla. Bucky struggled to keep his wits about him as he watched her.

“You brought those for me?” She pointed at the small bouquet in his hands. It was not much, but at least something.

“Of course. Pretty flowers for a pretty lady.” Bucky smirked, passing them over. Meanwhile, her dad stood there with a sour look on his face. Noticing this, he retreated just a bit after passing the flowers, while she put her hand on his shoulder gently.

“Daddy, don’t scare him. Bucky is a gentleman. He’s Becca’s big brother. If you should trust anyone with my safety for an evening, it’s Bucky.” The way she advocated for him nearly made the man blush. “Let me go put these in water and then we can go.”

After she left, her father leveled the younger man with a look, and held out his hand. Once Barnes had slipped his into the shake, her father gripped tight, and shook hard. “Treat her right, or I make sure that you have to move out of town.”

Feeling thoroughly terrified, but trying not to show it, Bucky nodded. “Yes, sir. Understood.”

“Ready to go, Bucky?” Coming back in, she had also grabbed her purse on the way. Released from the handshake with her father, James held out his arm towards her.

“After you.”

[mimzywhimsy]

The Bowens Problem: Breakups, Feuds, and Narrative Tension

Think about your favorite wrestling feuds in AEW. I'll name a few of my own from recent memory; MJF vs. CM Punk, Swerve vs. Hangman, Mariah May vs. Toni Storm, and Daniel Garcia vs. Jack Perry. I also like whatever the fuck The Elite have had going on, but that's a whole separate post.

What makes these feuds great? Three things come to mind: Pacing, History, and Character Work.

I'll start with the easiest: pacing. Groundwork needs to be laid. Foreshadowing. Length of time, to really establish the relationship. Rushing a feud is like jacking off to relieve sexual frustration; it might get the job done in the end, but is it really satisfying? Would MJF vs. Punk be as good if we didn't have them blatantly ignoring each other for weeks before meeting face to face on the mic? Would Mariah May's betrayal be as gutwrenching if we didn't follow her efforts to gain Timeless Toni's trust?

The Acclaimed's breakup feud is good when it comes to pacing. Max Caster has been calling himself the Best Wrestler Alive on TV for many months now, and we've seen how his attitude change has slowly worn down on Anthony Bowens' last nerve. How The Acclaimed just aren't winning matches when it counts anymore; something's been off. They've been more and more out of sync in the ring, and Max has only gotten more abrasive and egotistical. Their breakup was hardly a surprise, for this reason.

Next, history. All the feuds I've listed above have this, to one extent or another. MJF's history as a rabid fan of Punk's as a kid. That autograph signing picture. Mariah May following in Toni Storm's footsteps, career-wise. Jack Perry's history as a fan-favorite babyface and his subsequent fall from grace intersects neatly with Daniel Garcia rise from tough midcard heel to beloved, dancing face.

The Acclaimed also have plenty of history: we've been along for the entire ride, witnessing it. Their rise from an obscure Dark tag team to one of the most popular and well-known acts. They fought their battles together, even when the going got tough. Suspensions and ill-times injuries couldn't break them up. They had fire in their eyes and a clear-set goal to be Tag Team champions, and they achieved far beyond our wildest dreams.

So, what's my problem? This feud practically writes itself, right? The breakup of a beloved tag team is a classic trope. Max and Anthony have always portrayed themselves as a Heel-and-Babyface duo who balance each other out, so their roles for this story seem well defined.

....But is that really the best way to go about it?

Enter the third element: character work. Specifically, I want to talk about tensions.

If Max is a clear-cut heel and Anthony is an obvious face, it makes sense- but it's also boring. In other good feuds, even if there is clearly a "good guy" to root for, nothing is ever black and white. Think of MJF's inner vulnerability, and Punk's underlying cruelty towards him. Mariah May's love for Toni that she tries so hard to deny. Daniel Garcia's inherent violent nature that he has to fight against to literally not kill Jack Perry. Swerve is dangerous, and he broke into Hangman's house, but then Hangman burned his childhood home down.

Do not boo me- do NOT boo me for being right, when I say that out of the two, Max Caster has been doing much better character work. It's in his music, his indie work, and (more recently) his work on AEW.

He's especially good at creating tension by showing the warring dichotomy within himself. He has a huge ego, but only to cope with his poor self esteem. He's a sleazeball player who wants love and is afraid of ending up all alone. He never shuts the fuck up, but who is he if he's silent? Sure, he's embarrassing himself in the ring- but is he more delusional than any other wrestler that refuses to give up in the face of hardship? Stubbornly sticking to an idea arguably led to The Acclaimed winning championships. Hell, he refused to stop scissoring his partner, and look what that led to!

Max Caster is an AEW locker room veteran who clearly loves to big league and bully his lessers. He's super awkward and doesn't seem to have many friends. He thinks he's better than everyone else. He's his own worst enemy and harshest critic. He's rich, and pretty, and powerful, and successful. He's the loneliest and saddest guy in the world.

He's a multidimensional, fleshed-out character.

Anthony Bowens is....a good guy? I struggle to figure out anything about him besides for the fact that he's a Great Athlete and Nice Guy who is good at a lot of other things like modelling and baseball. He does and says all the right things. He speaks at colleges and attends charity events. He lives in a cute West Hollywood apartment with a cute husband. He's openly gay and proud of it, but isn't in your face about it like those other more annoying gays! He's not The Gay Wrestler, he's just a wrestler...who is gay....and nice...and talented.

Do you see my problem, here? Anthony Bowens does not bring any tension to the narrative.

He's flatter than Charlotte Flair's pancake ass. He's so focused on being picture perfect that he fails to provide any substance for me to sink my teeth into.

But the thing is, he easily could! He checks all the right boxes and says all the right things- but isn't that just the slightest bit calculating and manipulative? If the image he broadcasts to the world is so perfect, then doesn't that imply that it might be fake? He wants to keep doing the Scissor Me Daddy shtick despite it getting stale, why? The money? The merch sales? Would a good guy with nothing but good intentions cynically do a segment with the Costco Guys and fucking Jericho?

No hate, I'm not trying to smear Bowens' name here! We're in the middle of the feud, so maybe he'll surprise me. I think that Caster's appeal in part comes down to how willing he is to be vulnerable and messy. It might benefit Bowens to do a little of the same.

[scribbles97]

Hello!

I hope your "something stupid" actually turns out to be very fulfilling - even fun.

As for a prompt . . . I immediately thought of what makes me anxious and wondered if you could do something with "supporting a loved one through dentist-visit-anxiety."

Or, perhaps more fun might be dealing with a post-dental-work-loopy loved one.

Hugs.

Biggest of hugs to you! I don't think the below quite matches what you were probably expecting but it's where the muse wanted to go... Thank you for the distraction!

Gordon’s foot hadn’t stopped tapping the whole drive across the city. He’d been restless since Virgil had gotten up that morning, up and down from the sofa in the apartment adamant that he didn’t need to nap. 

Virgil knew he had probably spent the night clock watching, waiting for the moment that they could leave the apartment and head to the hospital. Moreover, he understood his younger brother’s anxiety. 

He had been back to the hospital plenty of times since he had been released, and had eventually been comfortable enough to go to his rechecks without a brotherly escort. He’d had bloods, scans, and physio for months, and it had all very much finally paid off. 

Until one of the screws in his leg had come loose and started causing discomfort. 

It had been a concerning turn for all of them, each afraid that any form of regression would send Gordon further back from his return to duty. When they had been so close to having him back, it felt like another blow that they would be forced to struggle to stand from. 

The doctors had assured Gordon that removal would solve the issue, that the procedure would be straightforward and his recovery prompt. 

Then they had told him about the anaesthetic. 

Gordon hadn’t been able to sit still all week, and with his leg aching his usual outlet of the pool had been a no go. Instead, his nervous energy had flooded the entire house setting both Scott and Alan on edge. Their eldest brother had tried to take control of the situation, only to tip Gordon over the edge and set them both off in a screaming match. Alan had tried to distract him with video games, only for Gordon to get further frustrated when he couldn’t bring himself to focus on the objective. 

It had been John that had pulled him from the Island, taking him to the apartment on the mainland and keeping him company. Being the person he was, John had been able to let the nervous energy wash over him without picking up on any of it. He had been able to sit and listen to Gordon’s inane rambling about twenty different subjects and respond appropriately without losing patience. 

“You’ll come right down to the theatre with me, right?” 

Virgil looked over to his younger brother as he swung the car into an available space. 

Gordon knew the answer. It had been the first night after he’d been told of the anaesthetic that they had all sat and planned what would happen that day. Grandma had been the one to pull the strings with the hospital staff, whilst Scott had arranged for a sizable donation to seal the deal. John was waiting for them at the apartment, on hand if extra support was needed.

“Right down to the theatre,” He assured with a certain nod, “and then I’ll be observing until you’re sent to recovery.”

Gordon nodded as he swallowed, his fist tapping lightly against the open palm of his opposite hand as he took a slow even breath. 

Reaching across the centre console, he squeezed his brother’s shoulder, “I’ll be right with you the whole time.”

“This is stupid.”

“Not stupid.” He countered, shaking his head, “There’s nothing to feel stupid about here.”

Gordon swallowed again, “It’s gonna make me better.”

“Doesn’t make it less scary.” 

“No, but means I’ve gotta do it.” 

Virgil pressed his lips together, not really having an answer that would make things better.

“Thanks for being here.” 

Virgil shrugged, “Wouldn’t be anywhere else.” 

Gordon’s smile was small as he rested his hands on his legs, each breath controlled and steady as he started down at his feet. They all knew he’d get through it, as stubborn as any of the rest of them, and as determined to get himself back to where he had been. They’d all sworn to be there to support him through it all, through the big things and the little things. They’d do anything he asked of them if it made even the slightest of difference, not just to Gordon but to the rest of them. 

Scott taking control, Alan’s distraction, John’s listening, it was all their own ways of coping too. Each of them had their own memories and nightmares from seeing a brother in a coma, the thought of him going back there, back to the hospital for any procedure had set them all reeling. 

It was Gordon’s anxiety that had given Virgil the excuse to tag along for the day, but it was as much for the rest of the family as it was for their resident fish. 

“I think we should go out at the weekend.” Gordon started as he reached for the door handle, “We could bring Two over and go to that steak place on the beach we like.”

Virgil smiled in agreement as Gordon stepped out of the car, following his little brother’s lead as he pulled the key from the ignition. Shutting the door, he followed Gordon towards the hospital entrance, falling into step with him as easily as normal. 

“I’ll organise it whilst you’re snoozing,” He offered, knowing it would be a good distraction for everyone, “but I’m not liable if Scott picks the place you’re banned from for desert.” 

Gordon laughed softly as he looked up to the hospital entrance, “Tell him it was my idea, I’m sure he’ll change his mind then.” 

Slinging an arm across the broad swimmer’s shoulders, Virgil nodded, “You ready?”

Gordon rolled his shoulders under his arm before he nodded slowly, “Got my bro with me, I’m as ready as I’ll ever be.”

Together they walked into the building, both thinking of the weekend, steak, and their family.