#like the concept seems cunty

[fearbehere]

there’s a lot to criticise about taylor swift but tonight she is like the christian god to me

[holymaccaronii]

uh so I forgot which post this was now but you know the one where you were talking about developing the lore and you attached that one eggman meme where he says ,"I miss my wife tails, I miss her a lot" or something like that, and it was said in reference to how AM is in your AU

Is it in reference about AM towards BE or Ellen, Benny, Gorrister, Nimdok and (somewhat because dude got slugged) Ted? I can see it being both because I swear you've joked(?) in some posts about them being spouses, but I can also see it being about those five if he were to see BE's five and miss his.

My pea brain cannot understand which or neither it may be, too much Madcom hyperfixating slaughtered my brain and then IHNMAIMS came along and finished it off

(p.s - is it agreed that Ellison made - or at least had some involvement since he voiced AM - AM so cunty in the game, like the way AM calls Ted sweetheart and baby screams cunty)

Oah an ask I receive about this au :,], I'll gladly answer what I understood was asked! This au is still a wip, thus why I keep mentioning everything as a 'concept' , so thing's may change later.

First off, this AU is based off the ending where both all the original survivors (except Ted as he gets slugged) and the two other allied mastercomputers die. It's basically a continuation of what will happen with the Luna colony and AM in his considerable solitude, BUT with the addition of my Ocs.

The eggman post made reference to a route where AM slowly gets convinced by BE's survivors to reconcile with her, as the story itself is divided into a prologue (that explains the background of the moon colony, how BE escaped to Earth, met AM and eventually kinda had a relationship going on with him before their eventual separation), and the main story (where the humans arrive, this route OR the others happen, each leading to a different ending).

[More yapping below]

AM feels jealous towards BE's survivors because of two reasons: they resemble his just like you said, and they are being treated just like he once was by BE. So AM basically has a mindset of: "oh these humans that look just like the survivors I spent 109 years torturing are living in paradise AND being treated nicely by my ex (that a part of me still loves), how can this hell possibly get worse".

I'm not sure if this explanation was clear enough, as there's SO MANY details I didn't mention for this to make complete sense, but that's the idea the au follows so far.

In conclusion: evil computer fumbles his only possibility of a romantic interest ever, gets replaced by 5 young humans (ALL WITH MOM/DAD ISSUES) that help their new mom get thru grief + are given the chance to live their biggest dreams and be free in return. After a few years the evil computer reaches out to them, n they are given the chance to either help him with his evil plan, help him get his 'wife' back or act against him.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk and thank you for asking :3c. If something still doesn't make sense feel free to ask!!

(Also YEA AM IS DEFO CUNTY AAHHH!!! I know that it may seem like my AM is mischaracterizing the original, but since his program gets corrupted in the au to the point of letting him express love a bit easier, I envisioned him as a cunty, stressed and sassy villain that still holds all his original hate inside ofc. Harlan was so real bc of those lines 😩)

[moldybonessmell]

The Umbrella Academy season 3 review post

I finally finished season 3 of tua even tho I've watched first two seasons first day they came out and oh boy do I have things to talk about-

To begin with, the things I like about new season:

- The way we finally dug into Allison's trauma and how she starts going psychotic is actually a good plot line especially the accent on how she just like any other Umbrella Academy people indulges in self-distructive behavior, she's really just like them

- Diego getting a kid as someone with the biggest daddy issues out there is a realistic plotline because having a kid (even if Stanley's not actually his) heals him in this regard tho he and Lila would get a kid anyway eventually but they really should've been more sad about Stanley thanosing out of the existence you know

- Five being the founder of The Temps Commission makes so much sense as he's the one with the power to travel time of course he's more powerful than it seemed

- Good music scenes. Music is what season 1 was incredible for and what I love about the show. In season 2 there weren't many scenes that caught my attention but in s3 it's definetely better. We got Klaus's death montage with "Crystallised" by The xx and celebration scene with "Another one bites the dust" by Queen + Luther on moon and "Friday I'm in Love" by The Cure these were really nice.

- The Oblivion Hotel is such a cool location and concept (a place for everyone) I like the change of place of action a lot, but the way it's a portal is kinda overused imo

- Lila and Five are still the best characters and carried the season

- Fei is such a cool chara with a distict character design (which most of Sparrow Academy lack tbh)

Now things I don't like:

- Ben being just a placeholder character is such a bummer because instead of getting angst and drama we got a mostly one-dimentional anti-hero who has a completely different personality from Ben. We got a tiny bit of his character when he admitted he just wants to be involved with everyone but it's really minimal.

I can't believe Klaus says "He's an asshole and he's dead to me" like WHAT DO YOU MEAN fuck no Klaus would not say that shit and he would not just give up on him. Yeah Luther says stuff like "I'm glad to see you even if you're different" or whatever but it's Klaus who've spent the most time with Ben.

The way literally any other actor could have played Sparrow Ben and nothing would change is lame af I hope in next season we will see more changes

- Same goes to my dear Grace who's just a placeholder for black hole worshipper like what do you mean we just got one phrase from Diego and that's it??? This whole bit with fake god and stuff really threw me off it didn't go anywhere

- The Sparrow Academy being one-dimentional characters in general like I get producers probably didn't have enough episodes to actually develop characters but holy shit are they boring.

Even if you want to make them just antagonists we had such cool villains in two previous seasons they were original and interesting (aka The powerless podcast-fan male manipulator Peabody and The Cunty Handler)

Also the way the fisrt Sparrows who died were the most annoying and cliche assholes makes them just filler charas

- How show tried to make us feel compassion to Reginald Hargreeves holy shit do I hate this guy- After Klaus realised his father was basically killing him over and over in his childhood instead of Klaus getting mad or upset and having a breakdown we got nothing.

He even came back to new timeline Reginald who's "nicer" for this asshole just to hurt him AGAIN

- Klaus mostly being a comic relief in this season is so fucked I love this character and in previous seasons we had a great look at his life and experiences but now he's just kinda there being high and that's it

"mm I guess he died a few times it's probably enough" - plot writers

no character development whatsoever is just upsetting.

And the amount of unnecessary traumatising aka Reginald training him was really not it, even if it's supposed to be a joke.

- Reginald being a two-faced ass like holy shit is this terrifying. Pogo was the one who gave Sparrows pills and now Klaus helped him to stop taking them and this asshole is taking advantage of naive and vulnerable Klaus.

It is in fact a good plot twist but bro I really did prefer Reginald being a cartoonish villian instead of actual pure evil like how does he have shitty motivation but still does just so much shit.

- The Umbrella Academy family having no improvement in their relationship. They still don't care Klaus relapsed, they still don't care about Viktor. All they care about is their own misery which is really in character but with three seasons out of the way and only one more left I would expect at least something you know.

- Viktor is still left out. Like bro the only compassion he had is only when he transitioned but this is it?? Bro's still waiting till someone comes and cares about him but not only this doesn't happen, he even gets rediculed by Sparrow Ben for that and called emo are you actually kidding me what's with all the hurt with no comfort???

It feels a lot like when you're mentally ill and your family kinda "walks on eggshells" to not trigger you but it's in quotes because they don't actually care. They act nice just because they think you're psycho and you would make less problems if they pretend. And this is very sad, Viktor is such a tragic character.

Okay that's it for now. If you have any thoughts please share in comments!

[curewimdy]

i think Sailor Moon's monsters tend to be more iconic than, for example, Precure monsters because you really can't go wrong with the hot lady+object/concept formula. like "cunty jigsaw puzzle catgirl" is just guaranteed to be a banger no matter what. but Precure monsters generally have to be large-scale and not humanoid because it's just better for the show's emphasis on physical combat and powerful punches and kicks -- you want to see those girls knock a modestly sized kaiju across a football field and you don't want the second graders in the audience to have to grapple with the implication of the Cures killing what seem to be sentient people, unless they're finishing off a midseason miniboss who is probably getting "purified" instead of killed anyway

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

yippie!!

ok so one day i was hangin out and thinking about how jinx and murie are both my favourite little sad wet guys in my two fave medias of all ever *And* at the same time SO far apart on the spectrum personalitywise

and it took me listening to this to flip the switch on the Autism Blender and want to just fucking mash them together like a coked up toddler making Slime out of fish guts and hayao miyazakis mothers ashes because thats what i do thats my job💅👌so theeeen it comes out pretty reminiscent of my first muriel au that also sprung up from a song i like, just- a bit to the left? like, moving along on the scale from The OG not liking violence and being involved in it whatsoever, to AU 1 where i pictured him going "yeah ok fuck it this is what i do i guess" and revengy motives to his whole thing that i now connected with him more thru the song lmao it just made me realize the vision of like. jinxies "murderingmurderinmurdering 💕fun✨" aspect + his potential desire to still do good things despite being doomed to be a machine made for destruction (ignore the fact of that desire being nonexistent in his canon form because of how he perceives himself as a thing unable to achieve performing any good ever under any circumstance) (but still refusing to actively cause harm as he isolates himself to prevent any situations arising that would lead him to do so) (ignore all that) (were yassifying him a little were allowed its fine ive already lost the plot here anyway were wildin) so a vigilanty type beat and also ~my axe is my buddy🥰 we both cry with the trees😔✊ /me & my axe will bring the devil to his knees (✿◕‿◕ )~ goes hard as phUCK

so then all that led to This new V.3 mutation where hed be actually having fun with it........ so I kinda start turning him over in my brain some more, forgetting about jink by now and at first I go Huh this is kinda. him but lucioey a lil bit. and THEN i go hm. Well this ground is awful soft n ready to dig

so with all that out of the way i can now present!: Brand New Vague Shadow of a Concept of an Idea that ill Never Do Anything with

and I really don’t know how to verbalize this very well at all mmjfdh but like. Ok bulletpoints activate

Muriel:

From a badass warrior tribe

Didn’t get booted out cuz theyre fine this time oopsie no genocide

Hes in there way chillin way awesome way good at fighting everybody loves him

Hes like. Way himboey in this one. SO jock. Smiles a lot <3 <3 <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

Like okay if i was actually serious about writing this I think id need a fucking lucio consultant because I really know zilch about that bitch but like okay you know how lucios kinda all scary n cunty and cunning and fancy and seems like hes got shit figured out. Until he *starts talking*? Muriel here is like that but hes just really fucking scary until he starts talking BUT not like normally where hes adorable just has resting bitch face, its just like. that part of him that came thru in the reversed ending at the very end, yknow. but make it less depressing ihjhsrfbjs hes like full letterman jacket highschool bully core total kurt & ram vibe, like ok youd see him on a battlefield ABsolutely WRECKIng some fools into a pulp with his bare bear hands and immediately after that he turns around like WOOOOOOO THAT’S what im TALKIN ABOUT LETS GO GUYS WHO WANTS A BEER *cut to him chugging an entire keg over his head with da boys around losing their minds* like think college frat but they raid villages for fun and profit. Pretty orc coded. Kinda thor coded. Actually exactly thorcoded wow that really is what I was going for. I was wondering why I couldn’t help imagining him with a australian accent, I guess that’s a mystery solved. anyway

Maybe his parents got killed in some other battle im not sure how to weave around that in detail yet BUT- ok so check this I thought ill have to give him some motive to wanna reach the devil somehow for,,.,,… something right. to make him fill an antagonist role So this might be stupid a lil I just thought of this and it needs to cook for sure but what if he just rolled up into vesuvia as the magic capital or something whtver, to figure out how to get to talk to the devil, cuz he just like, really wants his parents back cuz they got valhallad in some glorious combat, and they were cool and he misses them and they could fight some more cool fights together and pillage n chill jhbsfvjgzdc beCAUsE hear me out im rolling with the swap inversions opposites motive here right, so the thing that popped up in my head was- Lucio had the “I wanna kill my parents bcause I hate them and so I can rule and get what I want” thing goin at the start right, like that is basically what started it off he got his dad he didnt get morgha SO what IF I gave murie a “i wanna conquer this place and use it to get my parents back. cuz I missem :(” like fully turned it around idk IDK IT SEEMS MESSY IDK IS IT CUTE IS IT DUMB IT MAKES ME FEEL DUMB BUT IN THAT WAY THAT MIGHT MEAN THAT ITS ACTUALLY WORKING BUT I DONT KNOW *screaming with no air*

But overall yeah hes khal drogo but more noticeably himboey but not in a likeable way cuz were switching them so I cant make him likeable for myself hnjdgfgb leaning into popular dumb jock trope

UnLESSSS i DID combo it with murdermuriel au 1.0 some more and made their tribe like. Not murdery somehow like what would be the opposite of the og scourge roaming around ruining shit. well that was the og kokhuri but now I gotta do some fucking triple axels here to make it make sense so how the fuck do I make this version of kokhuri more warriory in culture than the original but still nice like robinhoody style jhbfsvhjbs this is falling tf apart might need to scrap it bc on lucios end itd be even harder wouldn’t it. Spartan cunts but they don’t kill people that’s a nono lmao

now im thinking some more about the aspect of lucio being, you know. a pretty shitty leader right, and how to incorporate that here, because i have no idea if im following an actual set rule here regarding whats swapped and how even, theres barely a theme im straight up just

but yeah so now i figure it could be murie tryna get his folks back because they were the actual defacto leaders of their tribe, he was just kinda still following along and doin his chores in being the uhh the face, the charisma, the one to kinda like. get the people on board easier with whatever decision they made for them and hyping it up as the best possible choice anyone could ever make and maybe even actually believing it too cuz theyre actually that tightknit and he trusts them with anything aw. is this too onedimensional or can i give my boy some good nice facking family relations at least in an alternate life ghhkjkfdh hes their pride n joy and can do no wrong but yeah the point is he himself hasnt actually made any decisions without them before, isnt very good at actually leading and strategizing and planning and knowing how everything complicated works and he knows it, so he sees his only solution in bringing them back to not let everything fall apart

SEE I BROUGHT IT AROUND I CLEANED UP NICE WITH OG LUCIO SETTING OFF FROM THE POINT OF FEELING LIKE HES THE BEST AT EVERYTHING AND SHOULD B RECOGNIZED AS SUCH AND TRYING TO GET RID OF HIS PARENTS TO GET IT AND MY BOY HERE ENDING UP EXACTLY OPPOSITE. GO SHAWTY GO SHAWTY IM SO SMART am i fucking up lulus backstory i feel like i am cuz im like wait what the fuck did he kill his dad for again. demonheart. deal. thing. whatd he wish. like he wasnt already running for count n shit yet he did want to climb up the ladder in his own tribe right i have no idea yell at me in comments thank you

I also don’t know if the first (last) scourge battle wouldve happened or nah

Lucio/Montag

Oh my fucking god what if I figured out an alternative L moniker for murie so theyd get to switch letters in their namesssssssss like lucio is a made up name he made it up so like UAGHASHG L.,,,...,, Lion ofthe,... south NO he HAS to be bEAR CODED AAFYFFHG BUT LUCIO HAD LEOPARD IMAGERY N SHIT RAAHAHHGH IM FITIN FOR MY LIFE HERE

Anyway he lives in a forest somewhere cuz his tribe threw him out fully voluntarily bc he sucks ass (or at least for their standards cuz I guess he would be way younger than 18 here for this) (Like a spartan type deal ur too weak we don’t want you *drops you off a cliff*  *but theres 4 feet of snow under it so he survives*  *that’s so fucking goofy hjbsfbj kinda suits him*) so uhhhhhh i don’t know where hed be currently chilling for an mc to meet him ever but yeah hes kinda Floki Vikings™ type of vibe at least visually that’s what came to mind first to picture him lol

look at this little blond rat bastard. adorable. becoming increasingly obsessed. picturing lucio with this exact hairline. moving on

and his thing is hes still insecure as fuck but worse at ignoring it and hiding it and hes a lil nervous bundle of sticks and always talking bc of it, kinda Bruno Madrigalesque type vibe julian but a pitch more pathetic who knew it could be done yknow? opposite of The OG The Mountain The Stone Cold Silent The Muriel The Scourge The Kokhuri The Third and also me when writing and not stopped in time

oh oh what if he was totes in denial that his tribe kicked him out and in his view hes on some super intense convoluted secret mission (lasting from. age 7 to now apparently) and as soon as hes done they’ll totally come back for him kdfsgjffd I thought it could either be his own copium or he took it from some last interaction with someone who took pity on him as a kid and wanted to give him some comfort, or something he misunderstood entirely

hm. They both have canid familiars idk what to do with that. muriel with two wolves tho. thats hot shit righ there if i do say so myself

oh now im toying with the idea of taking away muriels SUPPOSED YET UNCONFIRMED AS MY VERY CONTROLLED ACADEMIC STUDY HAS SHOWN COUGHCOUGHJHBSRGJBHF talking to animals buff, i dont wanna just take it and give it to lucio tho, but like. what the fuck else do i give him. astral projecting to tie into his ghost era? sounds dope actually alright lets do that lmao

ok its 1 30 am i hope this is comprehensible to anybody anywhere im zonking out now khbsfhbfk love u

@tetsuooooooooooo I've missed your essays, this was such a treat to log in to!!!

And WOW, thorcoded Muriel is not something I ever would have thought of on my own but oddly enough I feel like the AU you're coming up with could really work, goodness me. And the way you've inverted Lucio's character too!! I'd love to see how their interaction dynamics invert as well!

Always good to hear from you friend, hope you're doing well!

[kerubimcrepin]

Episode 31 - The Break

It will be so refreshing to liveblog an episode that isn't heavy on characterization or analysis, oh god, I am tired of typing words.

He is so sad and for no reason... I just want to wrap him in a heated blanket.

World's most serious case of Sads, finished off with an evil little glare.

I can imagine adult Joris doing the same thing to Kerubim even by Wakfu times. Just a cunty, unamused little gaze. I can see it so clearly. This will happen in season 4, mark my words.

Also, inside me are two wolves. One of them wants to say "perhaps it's unusual for Joris to not go hook line and sinker for whatever ideas Keke proposes", and the other wants to say "Joris and Kerubim having psychic vibe battles moment #5"

He is so unserious.

Joris loses this round in the game of mutual psychological manipulations.

(Guy who notices landmarks in this show voice) (Also, guy who, for some reason, has developed a parasocial relationship with this setpiece in a kids show voice) THE TOWER. THE FUCKING TOWER

I've already spoken on this topic, but Kerubim already being known to sell stuff and have strong opinions on the ethics of museums makes me so unwell. Especially with implications of the Crepin family being salespeople.

I am not going to elaborate. You've read my other posts. Just... yeah.

Can I get some love for non-Cra archers in this universe? The degree of unemployment must be hellish.

Also Lou has two swords, and Nella has two quivers. They are so normal.

Some may think that Kerubim is out of shape, but I will argue that this is his Farm Boy shape. His "not constantly on the road and fighting monsters while worrying about travelling supplies" shape.

He's still muscular, because Herding Animals is Serious Business, but he's got a bit of a gut going on, because there's no food insecurity, and the food he has is mostly meat and milk.

Considering old Kerubim also has the gut, — and is, notably, still very agile, — I think that this is just, like, Kerubim's natural shape when he's eating well and living like a normal person.

Sorry for overanalysing his body. I just wanted to talk about my "adventuring should be deconstructed as a concept and examined more closely, considering the multiple characters who had been ready to die "to become legends" about it. Like is all the trauma, food insecurity, and violence worth it, when the only way for people to truly respect you in this career, is to die in a cool way?" agenda.

The resemblance between young Keke in this episode and his older self is actually scary.

Say NO to alcohol, say YES to being a calcium-based lifeform.

I've never mentioned this before on this blog, but it's very likely that Kerubim is kind-of-sort-of accidentally implied to have an underbite.

It varies, whether he has his teeth in a normal bite, or an underbite, — and it is an art style choice, it happens to some other characters, albeit nowhere near as often as it does to Kerubim, — but, once you see it, and know what I'm talking about, you can't unsee it. Hell, it's on half the screenshots in this episode already!

Underbites are something that goes in families, which fits really well.

Because, like... yeah. That sure does seem like a family thing.

Together with the "pale-ish brown pigmentation around an eye or both eyes" thing, and the triangle-ish shape of their heads and snouts, Keke and Atch are the Bouba and Kiki of siblinghood.

Anyway, for transparency's sake, despite the underbite being one of Atcham's very notable character features, he is also sometimes drawn with a normal bite. Which might point towards Kerubim's underbite also being a genuine part of his character design, — instead of it being a case of animators liking the look of it a lot.

Personally, I like to think that both of them had been trying to fix his underbite his whole life by simply willing it away, and it's Not working.

If they actually realized they care about one another, and could be chill about it instead of immediately starting a Doomed Toxic Cottagecore Farm, Pangaea would reform.

Oh? You like Kerubim and Lou? Well, then, do you think Lou and Kerubim efficiently utilized girl power when they, Bontarians, went to their oh-so-hated Sidimote Moors and Brakmar, to conduct what they call a "slaughter-safari"?

This is not a Divorce Theory I usually subscribe to, but my funny crack theory is that she left him to go adventure around the world because he wanted to settle down and adopt a kid or whatever.

Truly, the possibilities of kerulou divorce theories are endless.

If they formed a polycule, Pangaea would explode.

I like to think that whatever Julith has going on is a cloak with a similar, but more complex enchantment.

This item is real, but I can't really find the sword mentioned by Lou moments prior.

I need to inject this image inside, intravenously.

...Anyway, you will never guess what my newest addition to the desktop wallpaper rotation is.

[loveregrown]

SHU FS2 CAME OUT. He looks balder than ever. I am not surprised nor entirely disappointed at his outfit being nothing to me, though it is a little saddening he’s following the same exact clothing trend he’s had in all his last cards. I like the unbloomed when it’s moving more but I like his little finger on head and his croissants naturally. Ugh, everytime I look at it, I strangely like it more. Why does this happen to me with cards! But also, why do the unbloomeds often eat up the bloomeds…?

The rose concept was already used on Hiyori you silly goose. Alas, they can share. But neither will be happy about it; he considered burning his shirt simply because Wataru said theirs matched.

I definitely like the fit more in 3DMV than in live2d, but it seems to often be the case with me so it’s only natural. But it doesn’t Always happen. Perhaps I was simply hating before. Or I am simply conditioning myself to it. The blue accents is very cute I love that shade so much. I like the coloured button-up a loooottttt & the red in the scr is so nice & I just I really like this outfit I do! & I like light colours so despite it being the same as his wedding tour 3⭐️ and his 4⭐️ in the wet Sena scout, it is pleasant nonetheless! It really is not awful, despite thinking he could have something far more unique, it was to be expected from how this round of feature scouts was going, where there seemed to be at most two categories of fashion, if not 3.

One thing I've been hating is the STUPID RANDOM STRIP OF FABRIC THEY KEEP GIVING THE 3DMV OUTFITS WHICH LIKE I GET BECAUSE IT'S PROBABLY BECAUSE THEY WANT TO DRAW THE EYES TO THE MOVEMENT OF IT A LOT OF THE OUTFITS SEEM DESIGNED WITH THIS PURPOSE BUT IT JUST LOOKS FUCKING STUPID SOMETIMES. LIKE. TOILET PAPER ROLL TUCKED INTO THEIR CLOTHES OR LIKE A STRANGE CURTAIN FOR THEIR ASS. OR SOMETHING. IT'S NOT RIGHT. But... well I suppose it works here. Especially since the cut of his suit is not at all a novelty but it's okay. But I was reminded of it seeing it in action in his spp... it is just nothing to me. The stupid piece of fabric I mean. it could be removed and I would not miss it. But I Understand It's Purpose therefore I do not despise it I just get find it silly.

What was the meaning of this. What’s wrong with you? Was there a need for roses on your flat arse. Embroidery on your behind. Though this sort of thing is awesome and cunty when done on like, jeans. And such.

He has a nice SCR… I like it a lot actually. SCRS aren’t always good & I never Purposefully get SCRS but it’s such a win to me when they are good because then I look at them & I smile. ☺️

Bwuh… I’m pretty sure Nito’s hair ribbon changes colour in scr to red too… maybe they both do… not okay. They look so, so good next to each other I should just die. I should just die.

It will never have the brilliance his FS1 holds, with it’s interesting silhouette which almost looks like a dress, and really fun boots, and the classic, stupid, gay, yet ever so fun Itsuki Shuu trademark hat on his head! But I am growing fonder of it the more I look at it. At least, everything ASIDE FROM THE BLOOMED. Which I don’t like. On the lower end of FS2s for me regarding bloomed illustration but points for everything else. You win this time despite objectively not being that good. I like the side of Shu it shows too. Even if his face looks stupid.

I don’t like his FS1 bloomed much specifically when it comes to his silly face & pose, but the outfit makes up for it. Do you notice how this is a pattern. But, either way, many parts of it are so dope, such as the spiral staircase, the dramatic element of the back of his outfit flaring up like that, the paintings on the wall and the chandelier. It’s all very grand. & if anyone deserves and should be expected to be grand, it is him. There’s a lot one can say about it really.

However, I like the lightness of his FS2. The romantic elements such as the shades used, the red roses, his ring. There’s a lot to be enjoyed here.

I haven’t looked at the full illustration for his FS2 yet but I am excited to witness it since often they coax me into liking the card more than when it is cropped/in actual card form. But his face in the bloomed, is stupid and gay. That is all. Otherwise, it’s Perce approved, all things considered. :-) but to be honest. It really does look like something you’d find at a mall. The outfit, I mean.

[gregoftom]

I JUST.

WHAT was normal about 4x01 AT ALL

(Also I'm holding the ambiguity of the disgusting brothers in my heart for as long as I can because <333)

Do they have NO CONCEPT of personal space?? (<3)

Can Tom be normal for five fucking minutes over Greg 'dating women' (he didn't know her surname >:3) AND ALSO he didn't know for sure that Logan has CCTVs like he could've played it off as a joke about the cameras but it just turned to "hey Greg, how did you two fuck? I need to know, you could be in trouble, don't leave anything out" and I just love that it seems like they're on a much more even playing field to the extent that Tom feels that to exert power over Greg he has to just lie about shit and say he can protect Greg from potentially imaginary dangers

And also

QGH I CANT FUCKING STAND THEM THEYRE ALWAYS SO CLOSE TOGETHER IALCJDDHDJDJDJDJDJFJ

HELP ITS LIKE LOOKING INTO A MIRROR JASJKASJAKSJ this was ME literally me when i first watched like holy fuck, i haaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhssssssssssssssssssssssnswhsnhwsnws. wsnwshwbsjwnskwnswkns. everything you just said is. yeah. agreed they are inSANE. what i love is like. how they are best friends. i will never shut up about how they like each other. they like each other's company. "i love you but i can't fucking stomach you" is a line that i think works for most relationships on this show like, loving somebody is shown as like. something that you just do. yknow? something that, although it's difficult and makes their choices harder, they can do it, right? but they find it impossible to like each other. i think greg and tom are the only people who actually like one another, save for willa and connor but like. lmfao the conwilla/tg paras are lelling since early season 1, so like. that just makes sense.

and tom is just so funny. and so is greg. greg is trying not to laugh at tom's cuntiness and tom is right out there showing how pleased he is when he's right about greg's date. they're ridiculous. just say you wanna go to bone town together! alone! good grief!!!!!!

AND YEAH GOD THAT SHOT IS. they. are so close it's actually gross like i'm SO. GRAGH!

here's some more shots that make me want to chew on exposed electrical wires:

[itchyeye]

Now I feel like I overpromised it a little since those are headcanons from a while ago, but I'll try my best! But before that, yes, that is the fic I meant! And I liked how they had Jon use an Artifact for the eye removal, since presumably, a regular one wouldn't have done the trick. Basically, and with the caveat that these headcanons are primarily built on the first 3.5 seasons and that they still didn't quite manage to capture every avatar experience, I had the impression that most avatars had to undergo a moment of death/rebirth to truly become avatars. Jon is basically the best example for it: He has the aptitude, and he's introduced to his position as an avatar for the Eye. Slowly, he develops powers, but he's still human enough, and it's only after the explosion, after explicitly choosing the Eye and coming back from the dead, that he truly became the Archivist. Sure, in the end, the rebirth element he shared with many other avatars was more thematic than an actual requirement (iirc Jonny also mentioned that at one point), but I also saw it as this life then basically being "borrowed" from the power they serve. We saw that with Daisy for example, who started wasting away in season 4.

Back then, I also assumed that the reason Gertrude died was because she chose death instead of the Eye, because I thought Elias's plan involved marking her as a "complete" Archivist for the Watcher's Crown (RIP to the Watcher's Crown as a concept, I thought it was a really cool name and I wish season 4 had delved more into it as a semi-red herring instead of having the characters assume it was off the table because Elias was in jail (I can't remember, did they assume that? I just felt like it only really came up once or twice, in Smirke's letter and maybe the finale where it's skipped over entirely as "yeah I tried that, it gave me near-omniscience, let's move on")). But I do love that the marking part was something specifically for Jon, that's very sexy.

Overall, I will admit that I fell a bit into the trappings of extrapolating things a little too narrowly, so that when canon followed up with specifics, my headcanons fell apart (for example, I was also pretty interested in how Orsinov's partner, whose granddaughter gave a statement about the Calliope, managed to escape the Stranger and thought there'd be a big reveal, but that never came. Which is fine, because apparently it's possible to escape your avatarhood and we don't need a specific statement for that), but I guess my general assumption still remains that before passing a certain Threshold, you can still escape that power, but once someone becomes an Avatar, there's no turning back and their existence will forever be bound to the power they chose to serve. It just feels less impactful to me if you can just "change your mind", even if "technically" you'd have to pay a high price.

yesss i also liked that jon had to use an artifact for eye removal. and i like that it still didn't work 🥰 also this fic isn't normally a flavor i go for in the sliding scale of dub/noncon but i love the concept sm, i love annabelle being cunty in the front row, and i love love love love love jon seeing the adoration in elias' face when he gets his eyes back. it's a good fic!! i enjoyed it nwn

i thought you were right about rebirth not being necessary because it jogged my memory for the s4 q+a so i went digging to find the word of god on the matter and:

ALEX You’ve mentioned that previously that in order to assume their full powers as an avatar, a death seems to be required. Does it make a difference that the death used to the fuel The Archivist’s transformation? Was that of another avatar? JONNY I don’t feel that a death is necessarily required to become an avatar? What is required to become an avatar is always active choice. ALEX Yes. JONNY You need to make an active decision to finally cross that threshold. ALEX (whispers) Because drama. JONNY And death is a very good motivator for that sort of decision. You know, that prospect of death is very scary and it’s such a… powerful categorical thing that… in the many cases, it is going to be the catalyst.

MAG 160.02 - Season 4 Q&A Part II

but i agree with you actually i think jonny contradicts his own lore?? death and rebirth is pretty obviously a necessary factor in becoming an avatar of fear. i think you're right on the money, i just posted a little collection of the "feed what feeds you" theme and it is made very clear in canon across all the entities that if you serve a fear, you need to feed it, or else it feeds on you instead of feeding you. daisy is a great example of this! jon is as well. so yes, i totally agree with your interpretation of their life being "borrowed" from their patron. that's exactly how i've always understood it to work as well.

re: the watcher's crown. it is mentioned in smirke's letter, but none of the details are mentioned. only the resulting sky that can look back:

I have been dreaming again, Jonah. The same every night for months, now. I imagine myself a boy again at Aspley. I awake, cold and alone in the dormitory. The sky outside is dark, and I see no stars. I light a candle, to better see my way, and step down the silent corridor. The master’s rooms are empty, the fire in the kitchen is dead. Eventually my steps lead out into the courtyard. It is so quiet that the sound of my feet upon the grass is painful to my ears. I stop, and look up at the sky, that empty black nothing, and I see the edges of the horizon becoming a dull white. I cannot understand what I am looking at. And then the sky blinks. And I awake. I am not a fool. I know well enough what this dream is likely to mean, and I warn you again, that if you have any remaining ambitions to use our work, to try and wear the Watcher’s Crown, you must abandon them! Not simply for the sake of your own soul, but for that of the world! I have always had the utmost respect for you as a man of dignity and learning. Do not allow yourself to fall to this madness.

MAG 138 The Architecture of Fear

from how this is phrased, it sounds to me like smirke knows the mechanics of the ritual. "to wear the watcher's crown" sounds to me like marking yourself with all of the fears. but what i don't think smirke knows is that it must be The Archivist who does this, because of their function as an avatar. they are already a catalog of fear. i see a lot of talk about how elias was a coward for not marking himself but he is not The Archivist. he is a servant of beholding (arguably its most powerful) but he is not The Archivist and he could never be. that is not his role to fill. he needed his Archivist to fulfill the watcher's crown, he couldn't do it himself.

sorry that's irrelevant to your point i just have strong opinions on elias-related things.

back to the red herring tho, i personally think that keeping all the details of the ritual a secret until 160 was perfect. 160 is my favorite episode and i think the reveal could not have been better. personally on my first list i figured out about halfway through s3 that jon was being marked by every single fear but i had no idea it was a ritual. it never crossed my mind. so i'm a huge fan of the fact that the watcher's crown was lowkey and under the radar for all of s4, i think the payoff was incredible. YMMV ofc!

but yes i agree it's extremely sexy that the marking was especially for jon 🥰 elias couldn't do it himself. he needed jon to do it. he needed to craft him into a god and he did. he honed him as a tool to bring the ceaseless watcher forth into the world and rip apart its weft. that's so 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

overall tho i agree with your assessment of there being a threshold/point of no return. i think that there are basically five (5) categories of alignmet/association with the fears:

Witness

this is ofc the most common category for people in general who have ever interacted with the fears but specifically for statement givers. lots of statement givers had something terrible happen to a loved one or a coworker or a friend and they come to tell the institute about it. their lives are touched by the entities of fear but they are not directly eaten by them. witnessing these events could lead them to being marked and they can become victims eventually after their initial escape.

Victim

self explanatory i think! you have a run in with an entity of fear and it gobbles you right up.

Monster

this is where the tier system breaks down a bit but basically there are things like the distortion, the creature that lives in the ming vase, the man upon the stair, who are all more than victims but less than avatars. leitner describes them really beautifully in MAG 80:

The books are, I think, their essences in a purer form. The other things that stalk us, from what I know of them, they have varying wills of their own. All in service of the thing they’re a part of, but not directly controlled by the mind beneath them. At least, inasmuch as these entities have something we could recognise as a mind.

Avatars

these are fully realized avatars that have consciously chosen their alignment with their patrons! simon, peter, elias, jude, arthur, etc.

Entity-Aligned

this is the loosest category and one that includes many of my favorite characters. mary, gerry, basira, gertrude. they're all marked by the fears, their lives are really quite controlled by them, but they have not made the conscious decision to become avatars. gertrude sort of straddles the Avatar and Aligned category because she was, of course, the archivist.... but she wasn't really. she had the formal position and she got the powers that come with it but she didn't serve the eye the way that the position really warranted. tumblr user sm0kebreaks has a great post talking about how gertrude was a crap archivist.

so i think that if you are entity-aligned but have not yet passed the point of no return and decided to become an avatar, you can break your alignment

melanie, for example, had her alignment with the slaughter broken when jon removed her cursed bullet and she broke her alignment with beholding when she gouged out her eyes. personally i think that cutting the bullet out of her shouldn't have worked tho, since she was making the conscious choice to keep it inside of her and she wanted the slaughter to continue to give her its power so like. to me that makes her an avatar, not aligned.

but maybe she was saved by her beholding alignment! maybe because she had a contract with the institute, another power couldn't fully claim her. wow. that would be like the tenth way jon saved her stupid life.

[synesindri]

Bestie I want to hear your thoughts today about adamnick

hehehehe yey <3 i'm about to talk too much

What made you ship it?

i just really fucking like the concept of vessels. i think it's so neat. i want to know so much about everybody who ever said yes and why they did that and what kind of experience they had and how they feel about it afterwards if they survived. i think they should be weird, i think they should feel barely human and have a hard time relating to people except each other anymore. nick is such a cornerstone for my understanding of vessels and angel-vessel dynamics and adam is such an interesting guy who has had so many things happen to him, and i was rotating them in my mind separately for a long time before eventually going "what if i rotated them in my mind together?" and now here we are.

i think i landed on them instead of nick/jimmy or whatever other options for a few reasons, one being that lucifer and michael are weird about each other so their temp vessels might as well also be weird about each other (albeit differently), another being that neither of them has living ties to the world anymore whereas jimmy does, and another being that the hints of their personalities seem compatible to me? like obviously we don't know a ton about either of them from canon (esp only s5 canon) but nick uses his two seconds of screen time to be DEEPLY sincere but also kind of an even-tempered sarcastic bitch, and adam uses his to be skeptical and cunty but also strongly motivated by a desire to be with the people who deserve his love and to do Right. those are similar enough that it made me feel like there could be some chemistry there that would manifest in, well, the dynamic i ended up giving them lol

as usual i'm on the fence about whether i ship them or if i don't ship them and just write about them fucking sometimes lol but i think what got me started on feeling like it is legitimately a ship to me (and not just two shells of guys who need to reconnect with their own bodies somehow) is that adam is dead but not anymore, and sarah is dead, and that's complicated. the mental image of adam lying in bed next to nick having a quiet flashback to being killed bloody in a way that is in some ways similar to how nick's wife was killed bloody did something to me. there is a lot of tension for adam about whether nick has room in his head to care about adam anymore after having loved and lost so spectacularly at least twice, and inevitably that becomes a question about "am i wife stand-in" — and my answer to that is generally, no, but kind of. and that's a bit ugly, but it's also hard not to think of it as shippy, when i consider it that way. What are your favorite things about the ship?

(this hinges on the fact that they are an extreme rarepair made up of characters i like a lot who have very little screen time who never met each other in canon so i can kind of do whatever i want 😂) i have an inexhaustible need to play with situations that are simultaneously grim, mundane, and gentle, and holy shit are they the perfect set of dudes to enact that. they're SO not the main characters; they get to make it up as they go or they can decide to just sit down on the ground and rot; it's all up to them; there's no pressure and they have no real reason to care about anything anymore, and yet.

(i also just. personally get a lot out of writing them. idk it's like...it's good for me to think about them as two facets of one being, not really understanding each other in a way that can always be put in words but that coordinate well, who hold each other up and help each other find little nice things to hold onto in a life that might feel aimless. good for my relationship with age as well, how people are different and the same at different ages) Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

i think my most unpopular opinion about them is that they are shippable 😂

[besidesitstoowarm]

"Doomsday" thoughts

i'm realizing i forgot to mention my WIFE freema agyeman in last episode. i'm so sorry baby. i can't wait for s3

anyway this episode fucks severely and kind of reminds me that a lot of diehard ten/rose shippers don't like. GET what makes them work, bc they don't get what makes rose work. i think i've said it before that not only do moffat haters not understand his era, but davies lovers often don't even really like it for the right reasons. or like, reasons that are based on the text instead of the tumblr interpretation of the text. this isn't to disparage davies likers or ten/rose shippers or whatever, just make sure you're remembering the episodes as they happened and not as 1080p gifsets you reblogged 8y ago

anyway! this was a great finale to s2 and to the rose era in general (i'll make a season retrospective w more detail). it's just some goddamn great doctor who, davies is masterful at weaving deep and impactful character work into the classic balls-to-the-wall insane doctor who shenanigans. let's explore, shall we

i love the idea behind the "genesis ark" like tell me that doesn't sound like something that already exists in dw canon. calling back to needing rose's touch bc humanity– the human ability/desire/habit of crossing boundaries, inherently filling every space, colonizing to be less generous– has a power to it. the bit as well about "cybermen will remove sex and class and race and creed" is a critique of centrism bc our differences make us human! they're beautiful! the great equalizer is horrific, imposed violence

i'm sorry if this seems homophobic but i don't think a straight person could have possibly written the dalek-cybermen interactions in this episode. "the daleks have no concept of elegance" "this is obvious" sorry it's just pure cuntiness on a level i have never seen a cishet achieve. i'm not stereotyping davies as just "sassy" or whatever he's deeply talented in all facets but bitchiness is indeed one of those facets

continuing the anti-establishment theme, yvonne walking into the cybermen hell saying "oh god, i did my duty" is deeply telling. the cyberman she becomes crying an oil-slick tear and fighting back saying "i did it for queen and country" is kind of sad and kind of horrifying. it's about the layers

rose gets to flex w the daleks by telling them what she did as bad wolf. "i met the emperor....and turned him into dust" yes!! yes!! get their asses baby!! "both sides had secrets" all the time war seeding is so tasteful and delicious. it works as both bread-crumbing info that will be revealed eventually and as background worldbuilding should they decide to never get into the nitty-gritty. they obviously do in "the end of time" for one and then eventually the 50th but davies plays it just subtle enough that if they never did get deeper into it, i don't think it would have felt like a cocktease

i love the pete-jackie stuff sorry. i love stories about people finding/refinding/etc love in their 40s. they're not the version of each other that they each know but they're close enough and they do love each other. their big hug made me emotional

and of course. the ending. what is there to say about the ending that hasn't been said a hundred million times already. murray gold is a fantastic composer and he CRUSHES it. the fact that ten was ready to sacrifice rose without her consent (which he will later do to donna! themes!), the fact that she fought the narrative and refused until tragedy took over, as it inevitably must. bad wolf bay. "i love you" "rose tyler, –" as tears drip down his face. oh i am just so sick. they were codependent and unhealthy but you really can't deny how much they cared for each other, and even tho i KNOW they meet up again and get their "happy" endings i just. oh it hit. phenomenal acting on both parts, incredible score, oh it just destroys me. a beautiful end for the season and for rose

side note, i did not recall that "runaway bride" was the next story. i totally forgot that we get the season-long gap before seeing donna again. i can't wait to get back to donna, she brings out the best in ten (being divorced and a pathetic wet beast)

season retrospective up soon!

[ungirthed]

the kisses in atla are actualyl good and cute and wish we could have seen that in action for LoK. also never wish to pin down sexuality cos thanks to the europeans that's when they made stuff that already sucked worse.

maiko with

"i'm bored" "i know" "i'm hungry" "so?" "so get me some food" "sure"

first of all, theyre pissed at each other. and even when they're annoyed they have to touch each other and be in each other's business and be strange and misunderstood but together. she didn't even say "get me some food" that pissed and zuko was irritated but still. he'll do it.

people say they wouldn't work and i don't really get that at all...maybe that ppl don't see It for them (which is fine!) or maybe because fandom wars of things that aren't real (which is stupid).

you can't disentangle their livelihoods and nationhood from their conceptions of self and the way they live. and i think that they are the most likely people—who growing up under, accepting, and/or being a footsoldier of imperialism, colonialism, and fascism and whatever political-economic system they have based on the falseness of ordained rights—could change or at least be open to it. also theyre teenagers. nothing about them lends to intelligibility with regards to their future besides their ages. usually the swiftness of the characters liking each other would make me laugh but it feels nice to be with them and the way they relate to each other.

when zuko said "i don't see it that way" in boiling rock, mai didn't even respond. she was pissed because he left her a note without saying goodbye and she loves him but she wasn't mad at his thoughts. his beliefs. that she must have known he always had. that she may have felt but allowed herself not to—which is a failure in itself and something she will have to atone for forever. they all will.

from what i have seen there seems to be some idea that mai is just a bitch? i guess? but zuko's character shows just how real these people are and how conflicted he is. he's complex but i thought it would be harder to connect to him because i hate everything harmful in this world but you can tell there's so much in him that's just very sensitive, intense, and good. good IN the dark because the dark is light too.

to me i dont think he could be with mai if she couldn't accept that or if she mocked it. her yawning the first time we see them with each other reminded me sm of iroh. at first i was like bitch wtf (after i laughed lmaooo)??? but then i laughed more cos like she obviously did it on purpose. he's not doing well. he never is but he's really not doing well. i was looking forward to the both of them anyway but i didn't want it to be like she's some cunty unfeeling gf and i feared that my fears would be cemented. but it was the opposite!!!

"i don't see it that way" and i think mai is starting to not see it that way too. if she even ever was connected to herself for long enough to think on what that means. her non-response and the fact that they were still talking to each other was such an important signifier. she had nothing to say because that's how they are it seems. the truth is something they need and zuko is genuinely a terrible liar and cannot keep his insides...inside lol. and even though she seems to have a tight lid it's not dishonesty she has a problem with at all. it's the consequences and with him the consequences will never be injurious. it hurts like hell to have someone leave you, break up, have this mission they feel they need to do but harm?

i'm so tired but i love them lmao

which is why i guess i got kinda confused when i saw something about mai not being a person outside of zuko. i REALLY like her character. she could be my favorite if she had a bigger role but i definitely liked her the moment i heard her. that's such a different way to introduce a female character that looks so dark and stoic...she just complains. and her voice is so beautiful lmao but like. she sounded miserable in a funny way. and the comics are really uh interesting (lmao) but it made me like her even more. she's very cool, very funny, very real.

learning how upset and scared she was for/at azula to put an apple on her head to set on fire. knowing that zuko is a sensitive boy who looooves his mom and her love and didn't want mai to hurt because he's a human being seeing another human being in distress so he pushes her to safety. (his "girls are crazy" made me laugh sfm. WE ARE.)

what i really loved was when azula decides to fuck around with her baby brother. i literally said "OH SHIT" irl because that's just such a fucked fucking thing to do. and mai's pause had me thinking she would try something else because you could tell that she didn't appreciate that and was calculating some other way to get what azula needed to finish this bullshit. and in another ep when mai gives azula the Look after she gets up to tend to ty lee bc azula was upset that no one was making out with her...mai makes it sound easy like she's fine with it but it isn't, she's not, and she's tired of all of this bullshit. she wasn't tired or angry enough but she got there.

i looooove love love love love when she says "helping the jerk that dumped me" #1 bc shes making fun of herself and him #2 because it helps her realize what the fuck is going on. i laughed bc she's dragging herself, betraying her imperial lover4life "best friend", and ruining her life in the process. it isn't really over a boy. it's over one of the few things she gives a single shit about because she was given a reason to care.

her scenes are heavily with zuko but that's because, narratively, atla being majorly his story she is in his life. that's how this stuff works. the world does revolve around zuko because the show is also about this amazing character. so the people in his orbit are about him. azula is a person outside of zuko but he is central to her life so he is why her character exists. they dont strip mai of her personhood but to us as a viewer watching the main characters worlds esp the other half of the protagonists (i call him a protag sorryyy) we know mai through zuko. i don't think being a girlfriend to the show's second main character and being introduced via that lens means you are nobody without them. that's a big part of her story tho! but he is not the reason i like her. i like her because i relate to her.

being different is hard especially if you've lived through abuse. being called melancholy and weird, resrved, intense can get really frustrating. having people misunderstand your interests and outlook. and then just being fucking depressed. i saw that the voice actress said her character is depressed (and probably anxious) and it makes complete sense now. that void in you, that need for serotonin, lack of joy in anything, turning yourself off so you can just exist for once. and having oppressive forces always telling you what to do. how to think act talk feel. even how to love. and fucking hating being told what the fuck to do.

everyone's got it all fucking together but the girl who pretends at having it together gets scolded for it but also for ever even thinking of falling apart. she doesn't have to leave those strange gloomy parts of herself behind with zuko and shouldn't with anyone (i know ty lee accepts her so much tho!)

she's not boring in the slightest. she's fucking cool and carries stilettos. fashion icon! but like when things get brighter she can have more interests, a say in herself, a say in her life. she has a safe haven with zuko because he's also all those things that she is too (but very open and honest). being different and unhappy and wanting something more when the world youre in cannot give it to you. for mai she accepted it (mistake. a bad one) and for zuko he just couldn't do it.

when he tells her that he wasn't himself she listens. she knew what he meant. i'm assuming she's felt what it's like to simply not be able to do This anymore. to hold on.

and she does like other people. i mean when zuko asked about that boy when he was being a pussy and jealous during The Beach i was surprised she didn't say "i don't think about him at all" but her reasoning was i don't know him so how can i? that's a different response than simple dismissal over someone you don't know to placate your boyfriend. she's not gonna do that anyway lmao but idk it was so interesting she displayed no hatred. how can i feel for him when i don't know who he is? but not you're the only one for me zuko pls cry some more! thank god

(aside: i like kiyoshi a lot for being serious and stoic but also not. shes' probably not as funny or playful but i love a bisexual bad weird tall bitch. her empathy weighing with the necessity of what is to be done. an individual in a crowd. idk i just like girls like that. and i think kiyoshi is exemplary of the type of person mai could become. all the things that make you different and off to others because you hate pretense and feel a lot become a strength.)

i also love that she lets ty lee hug her. yea personal space but whatever with your close friends you put up with shit. that "clumps?" thing was my faaaaaavorite. first of all cos theyre cute together gotta find some art and fic but also she was playing along. when she asks ty about the circus...did anyone else ask ty lee that? and mai actually being annoyed when ty lee makes fun of her with the makeup.

she is a very full human being living in a place where being an empty miserable shell is normal and they live like the tiny town in footloose. i forgot what katara told the man who killed her moms about himself that was so spot on. just about how EMPTY and unreal their lives are. how they don't know anything at all. they're tiny tiny men. that's what theyre living in and all the people who got out one way or another seem to have that problem: being different.

every time she defies azula even if it isn't to her face. when mai's fed up she cracks a joke at her own expense. if someone gave her some mao she'd def sit and think on it ;) i don't think it's fair to say she had no knowledge of things that her "nation" did but she is a teenager and a sad abused one whose conception of herself is so tied to all the order their environment dictates. the only way out of it was to paper over and try to have people understand her through the necessity of being walled off.

i think as the show goes on the problem is that the characters all feel and know they have to change. what used to work no longer works. they, every single one of htem, are living as abused kids and are trying to make that abuse work. some can never ever make up for the wrongs and probably dont want to, some will always have to attempt but can make an amazing life with that. in the fire nation, mai will always be bored because she's miserable and that misery is part of the fire nation's existence.

we didn't spend a lot of time with her but they made a character people really liked and connected to. whose motives are weird, human, and will forever need to be atoned for. looking cool while kicking people's asses > and having a best friend fuck up her own life cos u inspired her and she loves u then u go 2 prison and then the world is kinda free so she joins a girl gang and gets a gf (i made that up)

in the end mai is with zuko (the series finale group scene is one of my fav scenes in the series and i wish we had more and less of that kiss where i had to watch 2 5 year olds kiss with dramatic ass music omfg) but if she didn't want to be there she wouldn't be. ty lee isn't there. and yes suki is there and we could say it's the couples but suki has been fighting with them (and she and zuko are friends! i mean that's mostly after in the comics but whatever). so they want to be there. mai wants to connect with people and see what they have to do! and a big part of that is being with zuko and caring about what he cares about but her own interest herself. what are her interests? i wish we had gotten more time to see her hobbies or who she was. that isnt because they made her about zuko but simply the structure of the show. now i could expect more but considering they made a character who is relegated to girlfriend and, in typical atla fashion, wrote something solid is good to me. that's why i can like them a lot.

i don't think mai has also ever really lied except if she needed to. i have to go back and check but it strikes me that she's actually honest. i think this bitch is so cool!!!

the beach = ember island

[malorisaurus]

I checked out the audiobook of Most Ardently from my library, and I am listening to it now. Like most of these types of adaptations, I just can't seem to remove myself from analysis to enjoy the book as comfort entertainment. It isn't so much that I can't separate it from the original material (which I was fond of growing up). It is fine for me to acknowledge that Oliver Bennett and Elizabeth Bennett both exist on their own timelines—Oliver does not detract from Elizabeth. I have unfortunately seen some of that in community reviews.

With that said, Pride and Prejudice is not simply a romance. It is a satire, and often quite funny. I would have loved to see an adaptation that maintained the criticism of the social norms instead of replicating them within a wish-fulfillment fantasy—those social norms were worthy of being critiqued and I think that this book would have been better for it. I can't help but wonder if that is why the characters were aged down in the book. Because Oliver is only just exploring his identity and does not have the benefit of experience (he comes across as rather naive), Oliver himself is not in a position to critique the world he inhabits. It would have been less believable if he was 20 and facing spinsterhood in a few short years as a closeted trans man perceived by the world as a woman with no inheritance or independent wealth.

Additionally, it doesn't sit quite right with me to keep rewriting hetero stories as queer; I sympathize quite a lot with POC who don't identify with rewriting stories with inserted POC characters and instead long for new stories to be written. Similarly, I don't necessarily want to infuse the past with coming out stories. Heck, I maybe am too into Foucault to be all in on coming out as a modern concept. I want stories of queer joy—particularly trans joy—but I just don't know that regency England is where I am going to get that unless it is explored in a contextual way. Perhaps I was just too into Radcliffe Hall and Patricia Highsmith in my early 20s and am now just too sad and cunty to get pleasure from things. But I suspect that it has more to do with the fact that I found Oliver's trajectory to be alienating.

I had this problem with Bridgerton as well: I simply had too difficult of a time watching how that show handled race without questioning where all the opulence and wealth came from (hint: the money came from the slave trade and the opulent decor from orientalism). I mean that and I just did not enjoy the plot at all, lmao. But anyway, like, I know I am annoying! People just want to like their shows and have a nice time! But this is the brain I have, and I am stuck with it.

[manicdragondreamgirl]

I haven’t had chemistry since like 2008, and I’m also an idiot who likes to make my friends upset, so I rated the periodic table in order to tilt my friends:

Hydrogen - this is like your childhood friend who has always been with you more or less and always will be down to get a drink and chill even tho you haven’t spoken in years. Solid bro imo 7.5/10

Helium - always down for a good time, even if probably created Alvin and the Chipmunks which in some places is considered a war crime. 4/10

Lithium - Gives me bitchy vibes and is flammable as fuck if I remember. Skinny bitch with an attitude 3/10

Beryllium - idk this sounds like a sailor moon villain lol for that it can have a 6/10

Boron - more like BORONG amirite ha ha wait no seriously I have no idea lol 5/10 clean neutral rating

Carbon - *screaming* 2/10 I will not be taking questions

Nitrogen - cool cool cool tight tight tight 9/10 Nitrogen just is the cool hot chick you wish you were

Oxygen - kid who takes up all the glory for the group project even tho you did all the work, 4/10 for natural charisma

Fluorine - lol what are you knockoff chlorine lmfao bitch 3/10 reminds me of the dentist

Neon - I can vibe with this boy for his contributions to signs which cause my eyes to scream 8/10 modernized Art Deco thanks you

Sodium - 10/10 this is me and I won’t be taking questions next element

Magnesium - magnesium is a close relative of magnificent and therefore I think the case is closed folks 9/10

Aluminum - 10/10 for providing a home to my Diet Coke addiction I’d be dead without you

Silicon - 6.9/10 :smirk:

Phosphorous - This has a very soundly name and it’s welcome to do that but idk, not a fan, seems like he’d be smelly, 2/10

Sulfur - 1/10 pretty sure that dog farts are purely comprised of this and as such if I was leaving negative ratings I would

Chlorine - 7.8/10 for being in pools so we could swim without brain eating amoeba in the south you a champ

Argon - he seems like a nerd jk this guy has a good color 9/10 for just being himself

Potassium - I hate bananas and this word gives me the physical sensation of biting into one but only by thinking of abstract letters and making them into something which we can nutrientise from bananas and to me that shit is bananas, b a n a n a s — 3/10 for making me sing hollaback girl thru adhd word association

Calcium - hm my brain went to mega milk so you get a 2/10 today bud I don’t make the rules

Scandium - pretty sure this is fake lol what’s next faxdium, e-Mailite and copinium? 5/10

Titanium - this song’s a banger and also is the only thing that lets me wear earrings 10/10

Vanadium - if your erection lasts for longer than like idk it’s supposed to then don’t take vanadium wait what do you mean it’s not an ED treatment 4/10

Chromium - decent bloke shame the browser eats all your memory 5/10

Manganese - if a weeb tries to tell me how to pronounce mayonnaise one more time... 1/10

Iron - excellent tool against the fey, in your blood, what a bro, 10/10 this bitch slaps

Cobalt - has a powerful energy; I respect him. 8/10

Nickel - if I had a nickel for every time someone made this joke lol 5/10 he’s doing his best

Copper - taste bad 3/10

Zinc - isn’t that the dude in the green tunic and white tights who saves premcess Lelda or something lol 7/10 those games are good

Gallium - seems like a prick 4/10

Germanium - sounds like a child pronouncing geraniums which are superior 3/10

Arsenic - bad vibes coach 1/10

Selenium - isn’t this just sailor moon lol 10/10 love this bitch

Bromine - farmine wherever you aremine - 9/10 I love a good bro

Krypton - he’s okay I guess 5/10

Rubidium - yet another Steven universe villain who will be redeemed I imagine 4/10 seems a bit dull

Strontium - I feel nothing when I see this lad’s name and that seems like a shame 1/10 I don’t like it

Yttrium - this is an atrium in Yharnam, or something 8/10 would love to sit in one and make contact with higher beings

Zirconium - oh wait THIS is the sailor moon villain from the dead moon circus! 9/10 I enjoyed that arc

Niobium - seems sassy, I like that in an element 7/10

Molybdenum - I hate this one, rancid. 1/10 for making me have flashbacks to difficult Ancient Greek vocabulary there is no fucking way that sound combination is anything but Beta and Delta borking and then Latin being like oh imma steal that

Technetium - 6/10 decent name but seems a bit forced

Ruthenium - 5/10 kindly old lady element I guess lol

Rhodium - 10/10 this ain’t my first rhodium babee this lad has good vibes what a name what a king

Palladium - 10/10 for making me think of paladins

Silver - 12/10 I’m breaking the rules for this silver is the best it is so cool and also it is the other best tool for dealing with supernatural creatures when iron has failed you highly suggest Even if I am extremely allergic to it going into my ears...wait hold on

Cadmium - 2/10 sounds like a total douche

Indium - 8/10, i just think it’s independent and neat

Tin - 10/10 good ear sounds when involving rain and roof shapes and automatically reminds me of Nora Jones’s come away with me album which is also 10/10

Antimony - 7/10 decent protagonist good name all around seems rad

Tellurium - tell ur mom what? That’s so early 2010s league of legends humor bro 2.5/10

Iodine - strikes fear in my soul from having it poured on my wounds but this is why I have more pain tolerance than god 5.3/10

Xenon - I think this is a declension of Xena warrior princess which is a win in my eyes, 8/10

Caesium - kind of has a cunty Latin name, 4.5/10

Barium - yeah boss, bury’im! 7.5/10 I love a good mobster gag

Lanthanum - A bit pretentious on the Tolkien spectrum sorry bud 3/10 sounds like you’d be the dickwad elf everyone hates

Cerium - 6.5/10 I like this one, gives me a clean vibe

Praseodymium - the fuck who sneezed all their alphabet soup onto the paperwork and called it an element Christ we can’t keep doing this 1.5/10

Neodymium - oh my god what did I just say 1/10

Promethium - thank Christ we’re back to greek 9/10 Prometheus was a Chad I could get behind

Samarium - 5/10 gives me boring wizard vibes

Europium - 4.5/10 don’t rename opium chrissake can’t take these nerds anywhere

Gadolinium - 5/10 it’s a starship knockoff but it’s trying to be bold with the G sound

Terbium - 2/10 I don’t vibe with this one

Dysprosium - sounds like an antidepressant that has a lot of shitty side effects 3/10

Holmium - sounds like someone anxious asking their beloved to hold them 8/10 I like hurt/comfort fics

Erbium - you can’t just describe something as herby you daft bastard 2/10

Thulium - sounds like a spell I like it 8.5/10

Ytterbium - macguffin in a shite sci-fi show that gets highly overrated because BBC produced it and superwholock stans emerge and go utterly feral 1/10

Lutetium - bards are an element I agree 10/10

Hafnium - sounds like a river (my dog) sound and has a cute vibe, I’d offer it head pats 7/10

Tantalum - noooo you can’t be sad yuor so sexe haha 6.9/10 tantalizing

Tungsten - 10/10 this is a lad with history

Rhenium - 5.5/10 it’s ok

Osmium - 4/10 I wasn’t a big wizard of oz fan

Iridium - 9/10 sounds like iridescent and that’s in my top 10 favorite words and concepts

Platinum - 10/10 best Pokémon game

Gold - 7.9/10 all that glitters and all but it’s still pretty on some people, silver is better tho

Mercury - yikes 8/10 so it doesn’t kill me

Thallium - sounds like the brother character in a ps4 exclusive western rpg that oddly falls under the radar in terms of reviews and gets shafted at awards for no reason 7/10 I’ll support you tho

Lead - 2/10 that’s gonna be a no from me dawg pretty sure I still have lead in my hands from stabbing myself with my mechanical pencils

Bismuth - 6/10 sounds good in mouth and reminds me of biscuits for some reason, I’ll take it

Polonium - to thine own self be true so stop trying to act like the arts don’t influence science jk pretty sure this is named for Poland but hey that’s where we get the Witcher so you get a pass 6/10

Astatine - 1/10 I don’t even know what you are

Radon - 7/10 this motherfucker knows his shit and how to party, rad is right

Francium - I bring you francium...and I bring you myrdurdium... 7/10 for a good vine

Radium - killed the video star probably 9/10 I can get behind her

Actinium - as opposed to passtinium I prefer actinium in the voice of writing 8/10

Thorium - overrated Norse god 5/10 because lightning is still cool

Protactinum - sounds like some pretentious condom brand 4/10 wouldn’t do it with a dude who bought these

Uranium - I always thought she was a hot sailor scout 10/10

Neptunium - same for her I knew they weren’t cousins you couldn’t lie to me 4kids 10/10

Plutonium - sounds like a macguffin unfortunately 5/10

Americium - I read this with a pivotal letter missing and nearly died, 7/10 for the laugh

Curium - 10/10 gives me Curie vibes and also reminds me of curiosity which reminds me of—[old yellered before the association could set in]

Berkelium - what I shout when I want Burke (fam dog) to slaughter innocents and raze territories 2/10 world was not meant to know his commands

Californium - 1/10 California is cool with geography but probs could stand to chill with the ego sorry to my friends in Cali

Einsteinium - 6/10 it’s alright but we’re really running out of ideas huh

Fermium - 3/10 this one is porny

Mendelevium - 1/10 my brain didn’t like parsing this and I stand by my earlier statement of running out of good names

Nobelium - 0/10 you didn’t name any noble gases this cowards this gas can’t be a noble oh wait it’s NOBEL I take it back 5/10 seems an alright chap

Lawrencium - fear the old blood my sorry dead hunter’s ass I’ll never get back my life from the hours I spent trying to beat this lava shitting bastard 2/10 for being a boss who eats Taco Bell specifically before being challenged to have fresh lava shit with which to punish you for having the audacity to exist in his space

Rutherfordium - my god what a snob 4.2/10 I respect him a little but only because he sounds like a right lad

Dubnium - DROP THE BASS 10/10

Seoborgium - not sure about this one but it can have a 7/10

Bohrium - as an American English speaker this sound combination makes my pathetic throat become a black hole as I try to properly create the sound of it 10/10 I love when my body becomes a massive void in the universe

Hassium - lazy 2/10

Elements 109-118 can go fuck themselves I hate them all, collective 6.66/10 for their general demonic vibe

[adultswim2021]

Space Ghost Coast to Coast #85: “In Memory of Elizabeth Reed” | December 7, 2003 - 11:30 PM | S08E04

Happy 20th anniversary, Adult Swim. And, boy, what a momentous episode of Ghost do we have here to celebrate. There are a number of episodes where the guest is an event unto itself and this is truly one of them. Frequent punchline William Shatner is an absolute cunt... and a proper legend. His cuntiness and legendary status are two things that seem to be at odds with one another, and the Space Ghost crew have managed to come up with an artfully idiosyncratic episode to match Shatner’s weird-guy-ness. It’s a classic for sure, and important. But (making a “smug dipshit” face) is it funny?

YES! It’s FUNNY! I will admit though, the first time I saw this episode I didn’t quite know what to make of it. This is partially because I’m very much a Star Trek agnostic. I’ve never been into Star Trek. In the last few years I’ve watched most of the pre-Next Gen motion pictures for inane list-making reasons, and I enjoyed them to varying degrees, but Star Trek is truly not for me. I’m more of a... well, I’m not a Star Wars guy either. What’s the other one? Uh... Spaceballs. That’s it. I’m more of a Spaceballs guy.

But I feel like I’ve absorbed a lot of Star Trek lore through cultural osmosis. I vaguely understand that William Shatner has had some deliberately-paced choreographed fight scene on those rocks from Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey. When I hear music similar to the the music that Jim Carrey hums in The Cable Guy, I’m pretty sure whatever it is I’m watching is doing a Star Trek thing. And yes, I’ve watched every single Red Letter Media “Mike and Rich talk about Star Trek for 4 hours” video. But even today, after having picked up more Star Trek knowledge on my journey to the grave, I still have this nagging feeling of “I only sort of get this”.

Still, this episode has a handful of screamingly funny lines, and the episode ends wonderfully, with Space Ghost in his death throes, suffering the ultimate indignity of dying in front of William Shatner. There’s also the part where Zorak asks why everyone in Star Trek is black, and a part where Moltar nervously reads from his fan fiction (from a book labeled TARD WARS, hahaha). Shatner, who has a reputation for being arrogant and difficult, is as good a sport as one could hope. The show makes good use of his hammier moments, and only shits on him slightly in the process. The most notable moment is when Shatner says to Zorak “didn't you and I fight to the death?” to which Zorak replies “That sounds pretty dumb, man”. I’ve actually quoted this line many times. It’s one of the best.

Also, for those of you who like to track these things: the show features callbacks to other episodes and shows; the handimen at Zorak’s apartment are clearly extras from Sealab 2020/2021, one of the Leprechauns from Aqua Teen Hunger Force shows up, and there’s a poignant callback to classic Space Ghost episode “Banjo”. 

The title motif of this season is naming the episodes after Allman Brothers songs, and I always wondered about this one. Maybe I’m reaching, and it’s probably too disrespectful to be true, but I always thought that it was somehow a veiled reference to Shatner’s wife, whom he supposedly killed or let die. It’s simply too dark to be true, but it’s the first thought that immediately jumped to my mind when I first heard the title of this episode. Am I stupid for thinking this? Am I stupid because it OBVIOUSLY is a reference to that?? I simply do not know. I would like to know.

MAIL BAG

The big anniversary is upon us. What are your 20 favorite things about adult swim for 20 years going. Don't sleep on this question!

I gotta do SOMETHING special, so I might as well do this. More thought could have gone into this, but I spent about an hour trying to come up with episodes or moments from 20 different shows and putting them in rough chronological order. I limited myself to one episode/scene/moment/joke/whatever per show so it’s not all Space Ghost jokes. So, here we go:

Sealab 2021: “I, Robot”. Adult Swim proved it could be brilliant right out of the gate with the stealth premiere of “I, Robot”, but for Sealab it’s all downhill from here. (2000)

Space Ghost Coast to Coast: Space Ghost stops in his tracks to reminisce about the time Bobcat Goldthwait said "crack a window". The entire episode “Kentucky Nightmare” is brilliant, but this moment in particular so uniquely captures my sense of humor that it’s inexplicable. The dumb look on Space Ghost’s face when he stops in his tracks. Goddamn. (2001)

Aqua Teen Hunger Force: “Mayhem of the Mooninites” I tried very hard to make this all be individual jokes or scenes or whatever, but this is another episode where the entire thing is just line after line and I can’t really pick. This, “I Robot”, and “Kentucky Nightmare” is like a perfect trio illustrating how good Adult Swim really was right out of the gate. (2001)

Home Movies: Jason casually reveals that his parents have no idea who Brendon and Melissa are and that he spends most of his free-time making movies with them. This is the episode “Storm Warning” which is overall one of the best episodes of Home Movies, but this scene is probably my favorite. Illustrates how simple and hilarious the comedy is on this show. (2002)

Tom Goes to the Mayor: the end scene in “Undercover”, where they’ve shoddily reversed Tom’s various unnecessary surgeries and called him “Taumpy Tears” to boot. Positively sublime. (2006)

Metalocalypse: Dr. Rockso’s music video. From the episode “Dethclown”. I was never in love with this show as much as the true fans were, but there were a handful of incredible episodes. This episode basically tells one joke over and over and it’s very funny. It really ends with a bang showcasing Dr. Rockso’s shitty music video that celebrates cocaine use. His singing voice is hilarious. (2006)

Assy McGee: I am the only person in the world that defends Assy McGee as being “actually pretty good” and it’s all entirely due to this one line: Assy McGee (a pair of naked buttocks with legs, whose ass functions as his head) is forced to attend a black tie event and is just milling around wearing nothing but a black bow tie. Through clenched anus he delivers the line “I can barely breathe in this penguin suit”. The whole show is worth it for that joke. I don’t even know what episode it is except that it’s from one of the first few. I might not even have the line exactly right. But, I remember laughing so hard. I may not have laughed at Assy McGee again. (2006)

Saul of the Mole Men: The opening theme song. And nothing else. (2007)

Tim & Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!: Jim and Derrick. I should pick something more user-friendly maybe, since this episode almost entirely relies on being familiar with Tim & Eric’s previous episodes. But goddamn, this episode is such a funny concept (which is basically Tim & Eric doing an alternate MTV-ified version of Awesome Show) (2008)

Moral Orel: “Numb”. When Moral Orel suddenly stopped being a quirky Adult Swim comedy and suddenly started doing episodes that resembled art films. This episode is a fucking masterpiece. I remember sobbing the first time I saw it. There are a few in season 3 that are like that, but this one is my favorite. (2008)

Check it Out! with Dr. Steve Brule: Terry Bruge-Hiplo reviews “Dumpster’s Children”. Another bit of comedy that I’d describe as “inexplicable” and “sublime”, and it all hinges on an old man’s mouth. Holy fuck. I don’t think I’ve laughed harder than this at a TV show since. (2010)

Delocated: The ending of “Mole”, an extended Face/Off riff where Jon goes undercover as the scary mobster Sergei. In the final moments of the episode he marries a woman, fathers multiple children with her, and only then is pulled out of the mission. The episode is a tour-de-force of comic acting by Steve Cirbus, who is graciously allowed to shine for most of the episode. But man, that ending is fucking wonderful. (2010)

Venture Bros.: The ending of “Operation P.R.O.M.” a flurry of emotions hit me when “Like a Friend” by Pulp starts playing. The scene is so well done and weirdly touching. Brock realizes that deep down he gives a shit about the Venture family and is genuinely terrified something might happen to them. And then he gets to slaughter a bunch of Zorak monsters, which is also weirdly sweet. It’s even touching on a meta-level knowing that Jackson and Doc tried many times and failed to include licensed music in the show. I love Venture Bros, but I think we’d all be better off if this were the series finale. Sorry. I had to say it. (2010)

The Heart She Holler: The first scene with Patton being taught the way of the world posthumously by his father on a VHS tape. The first season of this show is amazing, but that scene, especially where Patton does a little Japanese bow and says “oh, hot dog!” is just hysterical. Literally every time a hot dog comes up in conversation my wife and I quote it. Please, do not scorn her, it’s not racist when SHE does it. (2011)

Eagleheart: The All That Jazz inspired finale. “Paradise Rising” is mostly a masterpiece, and how it ends is so fucking incredible. Easily the most under-rated show on Adult Swim and I’m not just saying that because... you know (mimes dick-sucking) (2014)

Rick and Morty: I watched the first two episodes of Rick and Morty, thought it was good, but for some reason didn’t become a devotee until my wife made me watch the Mr. Poopybutthole episode. It’s still my favorite episode, I think. (2015)

Brett Gelman’s Dinner in America: The “Dinner with” specials are all really good, but goddamn, this one hits. Should be shown in schools. I am going to go to every grade school in my county with an AR-15 (to get past the guards, of course) and I won’t leave until they call an assembly and they let me fumble around trying to find it on vimeo and play it for the students. (2016)

The Eric Andre Show: Eric interviews Steve Schirripa. The bit where he has an intern dip his balls in Steve’s spaghetti sauce is hilarious, naturally, but I’m here to showcase the running gag where every time Steve complains how hot the studio is, Eric just wordlessly hands him an ice cube until Steve explodes. It’s one of the most childishly hilarious things I’ve ever seen. It’s perfect. (2016)

Million Dollar Extreme Presents: World Peace: The Pick-Up artist sketch. I’m mostly unimpressed with MDE, and all but a few Sam Hyde bits leave me cold. But this sketch is a crowning achievement. I mean, I think these guys suck politically and are more mean than funny, but their sensibilities yielded one really incredible piece of comedy. Okay, I laughed at the blackface sketch too. There. You dragged it out of me. (2016) Joe Pera Talks With You: This show is beautiful and I love every episode. But the episode “Joe Pera Reads You The Church Announcements” Wherein Joe discovers a new-to-him song and can’t stop listening to it, is one of the most joyous episodes of television I’ve ever seen. A gateway episode. I tell everyone to please watch this one first. (2018)

[rughydrangea]

Do I have a chapter due on Friday? Yes! (And do I have to teach and grade and moderate a discussion, the reading for which I have not yet done, before then? Also yes! Fuck everything!) And did I finish the new season of The Crown in two days? Unfortunately...

This show is so weird. Fantastically acted. (People. Wake up. Tobias Menzies is INCREDIBLE and deserves award attention! Though his performance really does make you regret the two seasons we spent with Matt Smith, an actor I like, whose take on the role was ‘smug’ and literally nothing else.) Episodic in a way that I contend is a huge problem for British TV in general (I have thoughts about this!). Fucking sumptuous. And, increasingly, weirdly uncomfortable, as we get into recent history. 

But this season may be its best? I love the first season because it was our introduction to a young woman who was fucking destroyed by an inhumane institution (abolish the monarchy and make these losers get jobs! I am an American and perhaps my position here is predictable, but yeah, monarchy is fucking stupid, toss them overboard!), and Claire Foy was so incredible at showing how this person became walled up into a monument, and just bit by bit lost her humanity. But this season has the twin focus of Thatcher and Diana, which it really needed.

I will be honest here. I was born in 1990. My first memory of knowing who Diana was came at some point after she died. I do not remember her dying, and it could have been months or years later that I came to be conscious of who she was--but she never existed to me except as a person who had died. The genuine personal tragedy of her death aside, British royalty simply meant nothing to my family. My parents are both Americans and journalists, people who were concerned with real news, not what a bunch of rich inbred foreigners got up to. I don’t care if it’s mean to call them that, they are literally sheltering a sex criminal, so truly fuck them (Charles, if you want to prove to us that you hate Andrew as much as reports indicate you do, send him over here to US federal prosecutors!). Which is to say, I have no real pre-conceptions of Diana here. And Emma Corrin is, it turns out, a star. She’s incredible. I wouldn’t say that I fell in love with the character, per se--she’s a child, at first, she’s so blank. But you see the way she gets swallowed up by this absolutely evil family, and all you can do is pity her, and admire her for what she was able to build out of that pain. 

As for Charles... yikes. I’ve seen people saying that this season exposes what an asshole he is, and on the one hand, absolutely, he comes across terribly. But if I were the real Charles I would be sending cash money to Josh O’Connor for making me seem a) human and b) handsome. This Charles sucks--but he’s so ruined himself that all he can do is ruin other people, and that goes right straight back to the way that his mother and father ruined him. The problem isn’t individuals (except Andrew! though like if I were Edward I would also be annoyed at how this season portrays me as an asshole twit. I mean, I’ll trust that it’s accurate, but nobody was thinking about Edward and Peter Morgan just aimed straight at him and honestly, I’m all for it! Though there was also the scene where Edward calls Charles ‘cunty’ which was fucking incredible), it’s this whole fucked grotesque mockery of sovereignty and humanity.

I guess this is why I don’t understand people who dismiss this show as royalist pablum. If you watch the show--these people suck! And yeah, specific things about the show are NOT GOOD (I will never get over the time we devoted a whole s2 episode to Edward VIII being a goddamn motherfucking Nazi and then in s3 we had to deal with Charles whining that poor Edward was just such a fucking BRILLIANT INDIVIDUALIST, like, were I Charles, that’s when I would have filed the libel lawsuit!), but I would argue that it’s less about fetishizing power as such than the myriad ways that people manage to come together to fetishize power, and the things and people they’re willing to sacrifice to maintain this bullshit ideal. Peter Morgan, like many writers who clearly has nobody to tell him ‘no! fuck off!’ frequently gets carried away (I did love the s4 finale’s reminder that it doesn’t matter how lowborn you are, you are absolutely capable of fucking the working class over to your heart’s content and that’s girl power!), but I do think that the kernel at the heart of this show hates the monarchy, and is committed to showing how it destroys everyone involved in it (and I think Margaret is probably the best example of that--a truly independent spirit whose life was ruined by these people over and over again but who can’t decouple herself from the institution because she doesn’t understand how to exist without it).

So, uh, yeah. I watched the new season of The Crown! British friends, I’m so sorry your tax money pays for these twits/criminals to live! But also Boris Johnson may be a bigger problem for y’all, frankly.