#like the best I’ve ever seen was in umbrella academy and that’s just because that’s the style of representation I like best

[arcsin27]

So the sequel bait was a yoshi egg right. This is great because the best mario character birdo is closely tied to yoshi in lots of media iirc. But god almighty lord above birdo could be the best or the worst execution of a character ever and I am afraid

[umbrellalavender]

Umbrella Academy spoilers:

I’ve just finished the show.

I’m balling my eyes out on my sofa. Yet at the same time I feel so emotionally numb.

I enjoyed this season so much!

I don’t know if the ending was satisfying or not. I just don’t know. It made me feel something.

I was singing along to I Think We’re Alone Now just crying at the end. And I was screaming seeing all the characters back. And when Gabriel Bà was in it! (It might have been better if I watched it yesterday, considering that’s the day Pogo said?)

There were some moments that just really hit! Lila sending her family off to another timeline knowing that she’s going to have to sacrifice herself. Her and Allison knowing that their children aren’t going to have parents. And just seeing them on the field all happy made me cry so much.

I hate to admit that I wasn’t satisfied with Ben’s ending. I thought it would be a bit more emotional, but it just kind of sucked that he didn’t get that time with the others at the end. The effects when he was turning just made me laugh as well. Ben’s my favourite so I’m annoyed he didn’t get that time.

Also, I do kind of ship Ben and Jennifer. I’m not that familiar with MCR lore, but they remind me of the demolition lovers. When I think about them, I think about the ending of I Never Told You What I Do for a Living, “And never again, and never again, they gave us to shots to the back of the head and we’re all dead now.”

Umbrella Ben’s death hit me so hard! I was expecting this really emotional moment, but the lack of emotions in it really made it.

One: Ben was sent on this mission despite not wanting to go.

Two: They were made to blow up something with a living being inside. Ben didn’t want to blow up someone.

Three: Reginald shot Jennifer and his own son with no remorse what so ever. In front of his siblings!

Four: Ben and Jennifer’s body being the title card felt so brutal!

Five: Reginald wiped their minds so they wouldn’t remember what even happened to their own brother.

Six: He put the blame on his siblings! And gave that utterly shit eulogy! Somehow, that funeral scene found a way to become even more shitty, which is quite impressive!

Honestly, I think this was the best way to do it. There are so many questions around it too. Was Pogo aware of what happened? Was Ben? I get the idea that Umbrella Ben remembers being shot, but he probably wouldn’t know who killed him. Ben wouldn’t know that his siblings didn’t know?

I love Abigail and Reginald! It took me by surprise that Abigail was responsible for this and that she wanted the opposite to what Reggie wanted. Reggie had done all this to bring her back and she wanted to end it all. In a way, Reginald is quite similar to the children with his motivations and it really shines through this season. Colm Feore plays him so well! He’s funny and detestable at the same time.

I also really enjoy the subway system! I think it was a really cool way to show them travelling through timelines.

This might be controversial, but I enjoyed the Five and Lila situation. I’ve seen quite a lot of hate for it. But it made an interesting dynamic when they got back. And it also makes sense for the characters. They had been stuck jumping through timelines for 7 years.

I love that there are quite a lot of comic references in here. A small one is that I recognised who Jennifer was before her name was revealed because her name badge was the same design as the comics. Pretty proud of myself for that one!

But mostly that Klaus got to have his Hotel Oblivion story arc (it is Hotel Oblivion, right).

I have calmed down a little bit after writing this. It really feels like the end, you know? There’s no easy way to just bring the characters back in my mind and I don’t like that. I feel like after every season, I just feel smaller and smaller because of how many timelines they introduce. And this one is the same. It does a much better job at making me feel small. I still feel like there are many mysteries, which would be fun to delve into fanfiction for!

So, yeah. Long ramble about season 4. I enjoyed this season so much. And this show has meant a lot to me over the years. I can’t believe it’s over.

[rockinlibrarian]

Post-Umbrella Academy S4 Reaction Part Five, appropriately: On Love Triangles (spoilers under cut)

Man, that makes me feel compelled to add a Reaction Part to my projected six Reaction Parts, and then reorder them so Viktor's is seventh. Anyway.

So in this series of posts so far, we've had the Good, the Bad, and now we have the Incredibly Controversial. (We also had the Fandom and the Fix-it, but those didn't fit as nicely into that sentence).

I have a pretty nicely curated Tumblr dashboard. I only follow people I like, who have sensible things to say, and I try to avoid diving into tags and For Yous (which a remarkable amount of the time make no sense— when I do look at that feed, I see topics people I follow love that I have NEVER INTERACTED with. I tolerate these topics for the people I follow, why would I want to see more of those from strangers?).

Yet I have seen no middle ground on this next topic. Half my TUA mutuals are over the moon, half are positively livid.

And here am I in the middle feeling ACK.

I'm allowed to be in the middle, right?

Let’s dive into my opinions on (is this really a spoiler anymore here on Tumblr?) Five/Lila/Diego under the cut.

Yeah, it’s not my ship, and I would never have made the choice. I make no secret about my non-canon OTP, and Lila/Diego was the only CANON ship I ever found interesting enough to root for. I found Five and Lila’s best-frenemies relationship utterly delightful and I’ll miss getting to accept it as that and not the early stages of enemies-to-lovers. But from an in-story standpoint it does make perfect sense, even if it’s not a direction many viewers wanted it to go in.

Linking back to the Venn diagram I reblogged at the start of the Season 4 Discourse: “I liked it,” “It made in-universe sense,” “it made narrative sense.” Although, just to be annoying, the topic refuses to be sorted into even those categories nicely. Certainly most of us seem to disagree on which— if any of them— even apply.

Let’s take it one topic at a time. Viktor got a whole post to himself, so I need to give some attention to the other half of my favorite characters/OTP/most-commonly-POV’d babies, Five. You see, the most common complaint I hear about this plot development is that it’s totally out of character for Five. Five would never hurt Diego that way! Five is aroace! Five spent his life trying to get home to his siblings, he’d never give up and decide to stay in the subway! Since when would Five put romantic love over familial love?

I disagree. Maybe I’m wrong— many of the people I’ve seen making this claim have consistently written takes on Five that I very strongly adore. How could we disagree on whether or not the dude is in character here? But let me plead my case.

It’s true that Five is different this season, and not in a fun way. His feral-ness is one of the most delightful things about him in general, and it just…wasn’t there. But I think that’s a question for the “I liked it” portion of the Venn diagram (feral Five is so much more fun to watch than sad and tired Five) and possibly for the “narrative sense” portion (do you really want to abandon the the most popular qualities of a character just for the sake of realistic character progression?). It DOES make in-universe sense, because Five is depressed in season 4.

Think about where he is at the start of the season— and for the whole show before that. He spent his whole long, traumatic life obsessed with getting back to, with saving, these people, and all they have done in return is ignore him, yell at him, and blame him for things that weren’t his fault. Viktor my love not even you are an innocent here— sure you spent 17 years mourning him, but then when you finally get him back, you brush off or outright deny everything he ever confides in you, and then you abandon HIM for six years, and he was in the body of a minor at the time, he really could have used you by his side there! (My shipper heart insists his betrayal was the worst of all of them, and even platonically it very well could be).

These people he dedicated his life to turned out to not just be idiots (in his estimation), but they’ve gone and pushed each other— and him— away for six years. His whole life purpose had been to save them, and for what? For them to take it for granted, to squander their second (third, fourth…) chances at life complaining how life sucks and it’s probably Five’s fault? What did he do all this FOR, in the end? And what should he be doing with his life NOW? He’s lost his goals, his meaning. IT’S DEPRESSING DANGIT but it makes sense!

And then he ends up stranded in time. Again. But this time he’s with somebody else— an actual real-life friend instead of a figment of his imagination. He fell in love with Delores because they were partners alone in time— why wouldn’t it happen with a flesh-and-blood person, who can actually act in loving ways toward him? Okay, it’s his sister-in-law, but they’ve been lost for six years with no guarantee of ever getting back, she and Diego had already been on the rocks (I’ll get into her side of the thing farther down), and what does Five care about conventions like How to and not to act with one’s brother’s wife, anyway? He’s feral, remember? He’s not going to stop and say, “No, we can’t do this, it’ll hurt Diego’s feelings,” in this situation! They’re lost in time and all they have is each other!

And let’s examine the whole concept of Five in a romantic relationship to begin with. Obviously I’m not against the concept, because I ship him. It’s ridiculous on my part, because when I started reading TUA fanfic I honestly said, “Wow, it’s refreshing to have a character so impossible to ship as Five is— how many interesting GEN fics can this guy spawn?” and before I knew it I was shipping him with his adoptive brother. BUT. I have also fully embraced the popular headcanon that he’s ace (note: show-Five is not comics-Five in many ways, and this is one of them). Aspec, at least. (NOT aro: I don’t know how anyone can see the way he’s always talked about/treated Delores and not understand that he is absolutely a total romantic). Even in my shipping fics, he’s aspec— “Viktor-sexual,” I have called it even. He falls for his best friend, and his best friend only. And— if I can shamelessly quote one of my own fics here—

“Look, I was married to half a mannequin for thirty-some years, I may have a slightly different understanding of marriage than the average person….Yes, I said what I said. Delores is complicated, okay? There are facts, and there are truths. Facts are I created her out of the rubble of a department store and my own desperation. I know this, I do! But the truth is she loved me. She kept me alive, she lifted me when I would have given up, she fixed my mistakes but forgave me for them, she made me laugh and even laughed back at me. That's what marriage is to me. A partner through the twists and turns of life! It has nothing to do with desire and passion and sex.”

And that’s exactly what happened with Lila! They had become partners through the infinite twists and turns of a seemingly-impossible-to-escape life! I keep seeing “since when does Five think with his dick?” comments, but he WASN’T! It took nearly seven years of close proximity, you-and-me-against-the-multiverse partnership, and shared traumas to happen, and significantly, she made the first move. It absolutely holds up to my own personal headcanons of how Five interacts with romantic love.

And I feel like Five doesn’t really segregate different kinds of love. Romantic or familial, it’s all LOVE, right? We actually had this conversation in the comments of the above fic, “New World Symphony,” just days before S4 dropped: there’s a scene where Five completely confuses the others by explaining that he doesn’t think finding himself married to Viktor is weird because “you’re my brothers— that’s family; he’s my husband— that’s family too,” and JBD— who, I must point out, is not a Fiktor shipper— commented, “Aww, for Five, family is another word for people he loves.” And I thought that was a brilliant way to sum it up (funnily enough, I responded by referring to Five calling Lila “family” at the beginning of S3!). So when he finds the answer to getting home— is it really so hard to believe he doesn’t want to go back? Lila is family just as much as the others are, and LILA ACTUALLY SHOWS HIM LOVE, which is more than any of his adoptive sibs did for him for those first six years back. He was DEPRESSED in the real world, and now he’s HAPPY! Things change! Of course he dedicated his life to getting back home BEFORE, but like the first episode says, it was the Unbearable Tragedy of Getting What You Want! Now he knows better!

From an “In-show sense” standpoint. Maybe not from a “Narrative Sense” standpoint.

Let’s now try to discuss the state of Dilila, but more briefly. (This post is already 1800 words long). It made me sad to see what a mess their relationship had become in the past six years, and I thought it was kind of mean of the storyline to threaten to break them up, but after awhile, as we saw more of it, I had hope for them! I just rediscovered the “Into the Woods” soundtrack recently and suddenly they were reminding me of the Baker And His Wife— they needed to go Into the Woods--symbolically and literally—to be separated from each other, to learn new things about themselves, to yes even have an affair on her part— to appreciate what they had together, to rekindle their True Love. They needed to reevaluate themselves, each other, and their lives, and a separation would only help them to do so. (Now, when we talk about the in-characterness of it all, I DO question whether Lila was completely in character this season— but I mean, that’s part of it, IS she being herself? What does she NEED to be herself? She has to figure that out!)

And here’s where we get to the “Narrative Sense” problem, because that never had the chance to RESOLVE. Going back to what I said yesterday about the problem with The End— EVERYBODY HAD UNRESOLVED ISSUES, and SOME of them were too FRESH to be resolved! Who makes that narrative choice?!

I think narratively, it would work best if Lila and Diego reunited, appreciating each other all the more, and Five would let it happen because he’s primed to believe that being happy is too much to ask for, which is very sad but it works.

Except Lila never does make a choice, and Diego and Five die mad at each other.

Stupid ending.

But to be honest, maybe the writers didn’t want to make the choice because they couldn’t decide either. Narratively we’re rooting for Dilila, but from an in-show character standpoint, Lila and Five really are better for each other than Lila and Diego are. They’re on the same level. They understand each other in ways no one else can, being Commission Agents/murderers and having both been manipulated and betrayed by the Handler. They are matches for each other.

You know, I’m kind of annoyed by this fact. Five IS actually the better choice for Lila. I really want her to be happy with Diego but the facts are facts, she’d be happier with Five.

DANGIT I don’t even KNOW how to ultimately deal with them in the Summerland fix-it! I WANT Lila and Diego to reunite and also want Five to settle into a happy queerplatonic partnership with Viktor (I will DO MY BEST not to ship them in this fic, for the sake of everyone else who might want to read it, but that may be the extent of my best), but now I’m like is that really fair to Lila? UGH, RELATIONSHIPS!

I may settle for everybody taking a break from everybody while they work out their individual issues. (I did start writing a Diego and Kerry scene to immediately follow up the Five and Viktor scene I posted the other day, in which Kerry uses the Power of Autism to compel Diego to be introspective. Who knew.

“My brother stole my wife.” “Did she get free again?” “What?” “You said he stole her. Where did he put her?” “No, I meant he— they had an affair, he didn’t kidnap her.” “You said he stole her, but it sounds like she went with him because she wanted to, so that’s not stealing.” “It’s— why do you care?” “Because you’re not being accurate! He didn’t steal her if it was her choice to go!” “That—.” That made him very uncomfortable, was what that did. “Okay. My wife left me for my brother. That make sense to you?” She peered wide-eyed at him and started to open her mouth, so he added, “and yes she came back. Physically. But physically’s not the point.”

--snippet edited 12:46 ET 8/18/24 just because I actually wrote that final line and it gives the snippet more of a finished feeling so I had to add it. Anyway, so Diego ends up focusing on his issues with Always Being Second-Best at Summerland. If he learns to deal with his own insecurities, he could possibly even truly earn Lila’s love back! But first he has to deal with HIMSELF!)

Long story short, I did not hate this development, and the thing I liked least about it is tied to the thing I liked least about the whole season: if they'd only had time to resolve their issues before getting annihilated from existence, it wouldn't have been terrible! If THAT had been, then I'd be all for it!

I mean, mostly so. I'm still going to be a shameless Fiktor shipper, of course.

[angst-fairygodmother]

Darkened Hearts (The Umbrella Academy)

It’s been ten years of trying to move on. But when Reginald Hargreeves’ death sets off a snowball of events leading to the end of the world, you may as well throw in reuniting with an ex. But can Diego and Y/N set aside their difference and fix things, before the countdown ends and the world blows up the same way as their marriage?

CHAPTER 1: BAD IDEA

Word Count: 2293 Pairing: Diego Hargreeves x (fem)Reader Warnings: Drug references, references to canon-typical violence, canon-typical language Rating: T Cross-posted to AO3: here

A Sequel to Light Fingers

There were still days when your bare ring finger felt wrong, naked and exposed, or like a piece was missing. Today was one of those days, and you wished you knew why, the foreboding in your stomach heavy and almost painful. But you forced yourself out of bed anyway, forced yourself to put on your uniform and go to work for a double-shift and pretend that everything was just fine. 

~

“Hey Y/N,” one of the busboys called from where the rest of the kitchen staff were all crowded around the small television set, “Hargreeves. Isn’t that your ex’s last name?”

You frowned, setting down the cup you had been drying off and joining them. 

“The explorer and intellectual, perhaps best known for his controversial adopted children, The Umbrella Academy, was found in his home after a complete heart failure and cardiac arrest,” the reporter continued, reading from a sheet of paper. 

“Well damn, who knew he even had one of those?” you muttered, watching the images flashing on the screen as the woman continued on cheerfully, describing Reginald’s various accolades, glossing over or ignoring entirely his flaws.

“Authorities pronounced him dead on the scene, and the world now watches with baited breath for what happens next? Will the estranged young superheroes return for their father’s funeral, and will any of them claim his place as patriarch and headmaster of the once-famed Academy?”

You wondered if you should call Diego. What would you say? He wouldn’t want your sympathy, if anything he’d be glad the man was dead. But it seemed crass to suggest getting a drink together, for old time’s sake, to celebrate. 

You shook your head, forcing your eyes from the staticy screen. Probably best to do nothing. 

~

An hour or so later, the doorbell chimed as someone came in, despite the fact that the door should have been locked.

“We’re closed,” you called, not looking up from your task refilling boxes of sugar packets. 

“Y/N!” a familiar voice called dramatically. “I thought you’d be here, you workaholic you.”

“Klaus?” you startled, looking up to stare at him as he sauntered in. “What are you doing here?”

“Well. I was on my way to dear old dad’s funeral. I’m sure you heard that he croaked. And I thought, hm. I should bring a plus one, and who better than my best friend in the whole world who used to be married to my brother til he was stupid enough to let you get away.”

“That’s a long winded way of saying you’re trying to cause trouble on purpose.”

“No. I’m saying, don’t you want to see Diego? You can offer him...comfort?”

“I can’t do that Klaus. Diego and I have to stay out of each other’s lives.”

“Why?” his voice took on a whiny quality. “You’re like the only person he’s ever actually liked. I’ve never seen Diego smile before. Or since. Just when you two were together.”

You felt your resolve wavering before you swallowed those emotions back down. “It’s like...heroin.”

“What?” 

You motioned for Klaus to take a seat on one of the stools across from you, already pouring him a cup of coffee from the pot the staff had made to get through cleanup. 

“When a person gives up heroin, it’s because they know they’re addicted. They need it and rely on it, and quitting is acknowledging that’s a problem. It’s not healthy or safe or good for you.”

“Diego wasn’t safe? Did he hurt you? I’ll kill him if he did.” Klaus’s brows knit together, studying your face carefully. Despite his usual peacefulness, something in the way he said it made you believe him, and it sent a chill through you. 

“No. That’s not...stay with me here okay, please? Even once you’ve acknowledged those things and given it up, it’s not gone just like that.” You snapped your fingers. “Right? You miss it, and mourn it, and...crave it. But you can’t give into that feeling. You can’t let yourself surrender. So whenever you feel that itch, that hunger and heartbreak gnawing at you and determined to leave a hole in your gut you...chew a piece of gum or whatever instead. To distract yourself.”

“You replaced my brother with gum?” his eyes narrowed suspiciously.

You sighed, rubbing your temple. “No. I mean there may have been an attempt to with the cute girl from--” you shook your head, interrupting yourself. “It’s a metaphor Klaus. The point is that you can’t go back to the heroin. You can’t call it and check up on it and see how it’s doing. Or go to its father’s funeral and offer your condolences. You can’t apologize or say you made a mistake and gave up the best thing in your life and that losing it was the worst pain you’ve ever felt and I know it’s my fault and can we please please start over and try again.” 

You were near tears and turned your back to your friend to try and hide them. 

“With this conversation? Absolutely. I’m confused.” His voice had a teasing lilt that grated in the wake of how serious you were trying to be.

You growled in frustration, turning sharply back to him. “Clearly using a drug metaphor with you was a bad idea. I thought it’d help you understand but you’ve never willingly quit one in your life.”

“Hey! I’ve gone to rehab…”

“By force or for the convenience of a bed. And stole pills from the nurses’ station usually.”

“You’re being very mean.”

“You can leave whenever you want.”

“He needs you, Y/N. Not that he’ll ever admit it.”

“Klaus, please…” you sighed, closing your eyes. When you opened them again, he was gone, empty coffee cup the only trace he’d been more than a figment of your imagination.

~

Diego knew it was all bullshit, most of what Luther ever said was, but he couldn't stop thinking about it anyway. "It was personal" "someone with a grudge." And his own conclusions that there were no signs of forced entry or struggle. Not many people had both motive and means to pull it off: Reginald's five remaining children, only three of whom were in town and able to get to the Academy; maybe Pogo, although he'd never seen anything to think the chimp thought less than the best of the old man; and her. His ex-wife hated his father, maybe even more than he did, for everything he had done, directly or indirectly. And she was an expert thief, if anyone could get in and out undetected it would be her. He wanted to believe the coroner's report, to believe that at the end of the day Reginald was human enough to die of something mundane. But even if he did, Number One never would, and Y/N would be the top of his suspect list.

It would almost be for the best if it was her, if the other options were his siblings. That's what he tried to tell himself anyway as he threw a dagger to land between the eyes of a looming water buffalo. For the split second between when the blade left his fingers to when it thunked into place, he even considered how easy it would be to point Number One in that direction and let him go. 

“Diego, please. I’ve told you this already, but I’ll keep saying it until you believe me,” her voice rang in his ears, one of the few, failed attempts to sit down and work things out. “I wouldn’t have been sad if your father had been caught in the crossfire. In fact I probably would have gotten a pinata with his face on it. But I swear. On my mother, on my brother, on my father’s grave. Luther was not supposed to be there. And I never wanted anyone to get hurt.” 

Back then, he wouldn’t have doubted it for a second. But now…something just didn’t feel right. He was still contemplating the theory, turning it over in his mind like he frequently turned a knife in his hand, spinning it to the tune of the music drifting through, when a sound like thunder crashed and the room went dark. All thought of his ex and his father’s death left his mind in a rush as he rushed out to the courtyard, following the direction of both the noise, and the metal which all seemed to be suddenly magnetized toward its adjoining walls. 

~

It had been a few hours, but Klaus's words still plagued you. In many ways, he was right. You missed Diego, more than you could find the words for or even wrap your thoughts around. You had just pushed those feelings down further and further, a dammed tide as resentment and time became a wall between you. But there were still floodgates, and the mechanisms might be rusted to hell but a little grease could open them, in theory.

This was a unique opportunity. And you were concerned about what the loss, and the reunion with his siblings, might be doing to his head. It was just the nice thing, the right thing, to try and reach out.

It was a flimsy excuse, but you let it carry you and played it over and over while you toyed with the end of a sleeve and dialed the number on the old, faded post-it.

You almost hung up on the first ring, sucking a deep breath through your nose and steeling yourself when no one answered. 

The phone kept ringing, and you were just about to give up entirely when a voice you half-recognized answered.

“Hello? Who is this?” they asked.

“Uh. Hi. I’m looking for Diego Hargreeves. I’m a...an old friend, and I heard about his father…”

“He already left. I don’t know if he’ll be back for you to leave a message.”

“Oh. That’s okay. Am I speaking to one of his siblings then?”

“Yes. This is Luther Hargreeves.”

‘Shit,’ you couldn’t help thinking. ‘Of course it would be the sibling you most wanted to avoid.’

“Oh. I...I’m sorry for your loss then. I won’t take up any more of your time…”

“What did you say your name was again?”

“I...didn’t. I’m Y/N…”

“Y/N? As in--” you hung up the phone in a panic before he could finish his question and then sat, staring at the phone as if afraid it would, or daring it to, ring.

He had already left. He hated his father and that house. There was no reason to linger now, so he would have wasted no time. He was probably back at the Lion (you briefly considered calling there too, but Al was terrible at forwarding calls in the best times) or out on patrol.

You scrubbed your hands tiredly over your face and laughed bitterly at yourself. The whole idea had been so stupid.

~

Klaus rushed to follow his brother as he walked off. This day had been a laughable disaster, and it was probably a good thing that Y/N hadn't come after all. But he still wanted to do something. He missed happy Diego (he missed all of his siblings, Diego especially. Other than Ben, he had lost track of all of them a bit, or maybe more aptly lost himself. But this wasn't about him. It was about doing something good for once, and fixing Diego and Y/N's relationship, for them).

As he climbed into the back of the car over protest, he made a comment, something flippant and off-color and out of nowhere that he forgot as soon as it left his lips, and smiled when Diego cracked a smile in spite of himself. That was good, that was a start. 

They turned down dark side streets in silence while Klaus gnawed on a hang nail and tried to think.

“Hey, about what you said to Allison, the failed marriage thing,” he started suddenly.

“I don't want to talk about it Klaus,” Diego growled. “Just tell me where I'm dumping your ass so today can finally be over.”

“It's just…it felt like projection. And I'd know all about that. Do you want to talk about you and–”

“No Klaus, I just said I don't want to talk about it. Not now, not ever. It's over. It's done.”

“But–” Klaus yelped as Diego turned a sharp corner and he was nearly knocked into Ben's spectral lap. He gritted his teeth as he sat back upright. The direct approach was out then, time for plan B, in this case standing for Breakfast. Or maybe it should be D for Diner? W for Waitress? 

Not long after, they were parked down by the water, Diego doing something that involved a lot of staring and brooding, which was not unusual, but left Klaus uncomfortably alone with his thoughts, which were not being very productive. The only remotely helpful thing he remembered thinking was that the diner would be closing soon, and if they didn’t get there, it would all be wasted, take two, and he wouldn’t get a third try.

Klaus heard the vague crackle of Diego's bootleg police scanner but decided not to pay much attention to it, since through the closed door he couldn’t hear what exactly was said.

“Diego, thank you for joining us, we have decided on…drumroll…” he tapped tapped a rough pattern on the back of his brother’s seat, “wwwaafflllles.”

“I’m gonna drop you off at the bus stop. I gotta get back to work.”

Klaus's heart sank. And then somehow sank again when Diego slipped his old mask on, a sure sign there was no chance of changing his mind.

So much for a reunion.

[urchintoast]

I was tagged by @colettebronte and @fayes-fics! Thanks for thinking of me darlings!! 🫶🫶🫶

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

17

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

40,668

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently: Bridgerton and Fellow Travelers. But I’ve also written for The Umbrella Academy, Star Trek, Harry Potter, MCU, and Kingsman (though I don’t have any fics on ao3 for the last 2)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Ooh by Kudos?

It’s Not Saturday with 565

I See You with 452 (ooh this one’s moved up! TUA had been my top 3 for the longest time!)

Blush with 416

The Last Man with 415 (very close!)

His Everything with 410

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to! If someone made the effort to leave a comment for me, the least I can do is thank them for taking the time to read my silly writings 🥹 I have a lot of kudos/likes but the comments are rarer and mean the world to me 🥹

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably Milk? It’s in Hawk’s pov and I just find it very hard to not be angsty in his voice. Idk.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I love happy endings (don’t we all? 😜) so I tend to write happy endings for most of my fics. The absolute cheesiest is Pebble, although the relief in Fear is a great pay off in my opinion.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I did. I had some really mean comments a few years ago and that’s why I took such a long break from fic writing. A few people told me that my fics made no sense and told me to stop trying. It’s taken me a while to build my confidence back up after that, and I’m still really struggling with writing smut again after that.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I used to write some mlm and omegaverse fics but as previously mentioned, got some hate on them and stopped. Currently no, at least not that I’m comfortable sharing yet.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I’ve never written crossovers, though some AUs are fun!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of 🤔 hopefully it stays that way! Please don’t steal! 🥺

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not that’s been published, but with friends in discords over the years we’ve written some fics for ourselves. Always befriend authors, you get the best riffing!

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I can’t pick just one!! Ummmm. Nope, I can’t even pick just one for each fandom lol. I like different ships for different reasons, I can’t choose just one!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I’m determined to finish it! But right now Surprising seems like it’s not gonna be finished any time soon, just cause it’s been a published WIP since May, and then life happened and I just lost inspiration for it. Hopefully my muse will return soon once work and things settle down 🤞

16. What are your writing strengths?

Oh this is hard. I’m so critical of myself. Umm I’ve gotten some nice comments about funny dialogue so I guess that?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Besides finishing them? Length. Smut.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Please just have the translation available at some point (like a footnote) so I don’t have to open a new tab to look up what they’re saying because then I get distracted and forget that I was reading something lol

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter is the first one I published on ao3. No clue what the real first one is 🤷🏻‍♀️

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

I don’t really have a favorite? I’m pretty proud of them all for different reasons. Ease My Mind cause it was omega/omega and I’d never seen anyone do that before. Surprising because it got me back to writing. I See You because it’s the longest fic I’ve ever finished. Milk because I was the first one on ao3 to write for that pairing!

Really I could go on and on about why I’m proud of each fic 🥹

Thanks for tagging me!! 💗

[nosolaceofastraightanswer]

here’s my ALGAMATION post of s1e1 of the umbrella academy for the mass rewatch extravaganza. i have little posts too that are more standalone but whatever. i will post them separately. also sorry i watched the ep hours ago but had to have Family Time but i’m back and the days not over yet in my time zone sooo

first off, there’s a lot of memories here cus i haven’t rewatched since i did originally and that was like. a whole life ago for me. i mean it was before quarantine i was a different man.

that dance scene is amazing. i’m trying not to rehash all the things people have said a million times so here’s my review for the sillies: best dance goes to viktor because I Dance Like That and it is just as bad as that actually but it’s like a Vibe you know?? it’s the movin and groovin i can get behind. allison is best dance cus she did prop work, dancing with your fathers urn is iconic but she WORKED that boa.

idfc what you guys say about pogo i love him he’s the skrunkle. his little glasses???? bro.

viktor is So Small like he’s just a little guy. he’s a pathetic wet cat if i’ve ever seen one.

agnes, queen, ily. pls get a raise. i don’t remember her that much but i remember liking her romance storyline.

the istanbul not constantinople fight scene is just iconic and it reminds me of my brother cus i remember him thinking it was really cool.

QUOTES I ENJOYED:

pogo: your father loved you in his own way

viktor: that’s the problem 💀💀💀💀

five: “i know how to do everything”

klaus “no, it’s too late for eggs”

“because ya listen” area quinquagenarian (yes that is the real word wtf) loves his family, more at five (get it cus he’s #5 lmao)

okay gn guys!! ily and i’ll see you tmrw for ep2!!! i love this event sm. i gotta read what everyone said!!!!

[alagaisia]

Okay after some reflection I gotta say I was not as blown away by the season 2 soundtrack as I was by season 1

It’s not season 2’s fault! The music is good. But season one just had scene after inspired scene of perfect choices

This post was originally going to follow the formula of “S2 music was good but nothing can compare to” and one great scene from S1 but I couldn’t pick one favorite.

The motel fight scene with Sunshine, Lollipops, and Rainbows??

The department store fight scene with Don’t Stop Me Now???

The donut shop fight scene with Istanbul????

Run Boy Run?????????

[rebelumbrella46]

Okay, regarding the spoiler-free reviews I've read... (MINOR SPOILERS AHEAD)

-Luther: He finally gets a more relevant storyline. Yes! Although I didn't like his character in S1 (mainly because of the way he treated Klaus), he was still more of a key character in that season. In S2 i grew fond of him, but he didn't have a relevant story compared to the other siblings and was treated more like a supporting character. So I'm ready to see him get his own time in the spotlight and get some love that isn't from Allison.

Diego: He is one of my favorites and has been since S1. I liked his story with Lila last season and it seems that we will see them together again, so that's great. However, I am concerned about a review I read about his story "not really going anywhere by the end of the season"

Allison: Apparently, Allison has a darker storyline this season. I'm ready for it. Because so far we've only gotten a glimpse of the dark side of Allison's powers and how she sometimes gets carried away by them. One of the reviews says that she will face Viktor with some pent up grudges. I am totally in favour. Ever since he slit her throat, nearly killed her and destroyed the world in the timeline Claire lived in.

Klaus: What i'm looking forward the most this season, is his storyline (not just because he's my favorite), but because he was so underused in S2. Based on the comics, he's one of, if not the most powerful member of, the Umbrella Academy, and we haven't seen much of that. But I've read that Klaus has one of the best stories this season. And I'm dying to see it (No pun intended)

Five: I haven't read much of Five in the reviews except for one who said he wanted to retired, which is understandable. Considering the trailers, I don't think they're going to leave him in the background, I think his story is more of a secret and that's why there isn't much information about him in the reviews.

Viktor: I'm relieved to read that his transition was well done, reviews say it comes naturally and doesn't feel forced, which I feared it would. I really want to see what he's hiding from Allison to make her so mad. And also very excited to see how the siblings react to his coming out.

Ben (Sparrow Ben): Like Five, there wasn't enough of him in the reviews. Honestly, I don't think we'll see him interact with all the siblings. I don't know what his story will be, but regardless, I'm excited to see Justin H Min have a more individual role this season.

Sparrow Academy: Reviews say that aside from Ben and Sloane (who has a romantic history with Luther), sparrows aren't explored enough. I don't know how to feel about it, on the one hand it makes sense, there are so many to explore each and not enough episodes. It would take time away from the main characters (Umbrella Academy) but I also feel a bit disappointed because I think there was a lot of potential in characters like Fei, Alphonso and Jayme and their backstories.

Reginald: Apparently Reginald shows up more this season, which I'm really looking forward to seeing. Because even though he's a terrible father and the cause of so much trauma and trouble, he's a fascinating character to watch. I read somewhere that Klaus tries to see the good side of Reginald this season and it blew my mind.

A few more things I wanted to point out is that some reviews mention that there isn't really a villain this season other than the Kugelblitz and that it leaves a void that is felt after The Handler's magnificent performance last season. I have also not read any reviews in which the Commission is mentioned. Stan's character is supposed to be cool! And that this season has a more emotional impact than the previous ones.

In conclusion, I am even more excited to see the new season than ever.

[dialovers-translations]

Diabolik Lovers DARK FATE ー Tsukinami Prologue

<- RETURN TO GENERAL PROLOGUE

ー The scene starts in the classroom

Yui: ...I think I’ll stay behind a bit today and get some studying done after all. 

Female student C: I see. It’s a shame but tests are coming up, so let’s both try our best. 

Yui: Yeah! Thanks for inviting me though!

( Okay. Guess I’ll grab my stuff and head to the library. )

ー The scene shifts to the library

Yui: Nobody’s here...

( It’s a little lonely like this, but I should be able to focus and get a lot done. )

*Thud* 

Yui: I’ll get my assignments out of the way first...

*CRASH*

Yui: ...!!

( That scared me. Was that...thunder just now? Even though the night sky looked so pretty earlier... )

( I might have messed up by staying behind. I...didn’t bring an umbrella with me either... )

Haah...Just my luck...

*CRASH*

Yui: ...Eh? What...? A power outage...?

...That nearly gave me a heart attack...Wait...

???: ...

Yui: ...!?

( He startled me...I didn’t know someone was standing there... )

( I don’t think I’ve ever seen him before...? )

( Not many people attend this academy, so I can recognize most students’ faces, even if we’re not necessarily in the same class or grade... )

???: ...

Yui: ( Oh no. Our eyes met because I kept staring at him. )

G-Good evening...

*Rustle rustle*

Yui: ( T-Time to get back on track and look for the resources I need for this task...We have to search for an English book and translate it, right? )

*Thud*

Yui: Which book to choose...? Um, I’m pretty sure that around here...

ー Yui walks over to the other side of the bookshelf 

Yui: ( Maybe I should go for Shakespeare or something? I just hope it’s not too difficult... )

( Aah, there it is. I might be able toーー ) 

*CRASH*

Yui: Kyah...!!

*Thud*

*Thud thud thud*

Yui: ( ...! Oh no! I bumped into the shelf which is causing the book to...! )

ー She closes her eyes

Yui: ( It’s falling down...!! )

...Eh...?

ー Yui opens her eyes again

???: ーー Everything alright?

Yui: T...Thank you very much. 

( He was standing quite a bit away from me earlier so...How? )

???: Are you harmed? 

Yui: No, I’m fine.

???: I see.

ー Carla moves away

Yui: Ah, I’m so sorry. I’ll pick it up.

???: Here you go. 

Yui: Thank you very much. 

???: Macbeth, huh? Do you like this story? 

Yui: Ah...Yes.

???: ...Hmph. The irony. 

Yui: ...Excuse me...?

( This guy is really intimidating... )

???: I would like to ask something. 

Yui: ...!! Y-Yes? 

???: ...They say that fear stems from ignorance. In which case, do you believe that one’s fear will also disappear if one gains knowledge?

Yui: ...C-Come again...? 

( What is he asking all of a sudden...? )

( In short, we’re scared of things we don’t know... )

( So if we learn to understand them, we might no longer feel scared...? )

???: What is your answer? 

Yui: ...One might be somewhat less scared when no longer ignorant. 

However, I doubt that instinctive fear will disappear so easily. 

???: How would you describe instinctive fear?

Yui: Um...This is just an example, but I believe a lot of people aren’t too fond of snakes and such. 

I’ve read once that this is because snakes were the natural enemy of humans back in the distant past when we were still living up in trees...or something like that. 

I believe that these kinds of fears are inherent to our human nature, even if those concrete experiences no longer remain in our memories. 

So I doubt it’d be so easy to get rid of those fears...

???: I see. For example...You would make the same case for fear of Vampires. 

Yui: Eh...!? 

( Why...? Why would he mention Vampires...? )

???: ...

Yui: W-Well...I’m not sure. 

???: ...

Yui: ( Does he know something...? )

???: Hmph...You gave me a rather fascinating answer. I shall keep it in mind. 

Yui: Excuse me...!

???: Well then, if you’d excuse me now.

ー Carla walks away

Yui: Ah...! Wait...

( He left... )

What was that guy just now...? 

*TIMESKIP*

ー The scene shifts to the hallway

Yui: ーー The rain still hasn’t lifted...What should I do? I don’t have an umbrella. 

( I figured it’d stop raining by the time I finished my assignment... )

Haah...

???: I finally found you...

Yui: Eh? 

( H-He was standing right behind me, yet I didn’t notice... )

???: Hey. What were you doing till this late? 

Yui: Eh? 

???: I’m asking where you were?

Yui: D-Doing my homework at the library...

???: Hahー ...Homework, huh? You’re surprisingly serious. Geez...

I figured I would be able to track you down in no time given how intense your scent is. 

However, the rain covered up your smell, so I couldn’t quite pinpoint your location. 

My sense of smell hasn’t adapted to this world yet. 

Oh well. I suppose I should be grateful it’s raining when you’re this close to me. 

After all, your stench is horrible. Hehehe. 

Yui: Wha...!? 

( What is his problem? ...Stench...? )

???: You don’t feel anything yourself? Personally, I think this whole campus smells like shit.

Yui: I-I don’t smell anything...

???: Heeh. Nothing at all? I mean, I guess that makes sense. 

They do say that your nose gets used to scents when exposed to them too much, making you unable to smell them.

Besides, you’re completely covered in the stench yourself as well. Hehehe. 

Yui: ( ...This guy is really mean. )

ー Yui tries to leave

???: Woah there, where are you going? It’s pouring down outside. 

Yui: ...Leave me alone. 

???: Hehe. Did I hit a raw nerve? My bad. But the rain will lift in another five minutes, so why not wait a bit? 

Yui: Eh?

???: I have a great nose, you see. Although like I mentioned earlier, I’m not in tip-top shape just yet. 

However, the rain will lift. 

Yui: ...

???: Well then, I’ll leave it at that for today. Bye-bye. 

ー Shin leaves

Yui: ...What was that just now...? 

( I keep on running into strange individuals today...As if I’m dreaming or something. )

ー The rain stops

Yui: Ah...

( It stopped raining...Just like he said... )

Time to head home...

ー The scene shifts to the rooftop

??? 1: ーー Good grief. I can’t believe that silly girl is the one we’re looking for. 

??? 1: I have no idea who decided to put the heart of the daughter of the Demon Lord into her. 

??? 2: ...

??? 1: Nii-san?

??? 2: For now, we should praise ourselves lucky that she is still alive. 

??? 1: Well, I guess it was worth coming up with the whole Great Britain backstory. 

I don’t think we needed to take the roundabout route though. 

Mertz: Shin-sama. As I explained to you the other day, this school has ties to Karlheinz-sama. 

Without going through the trouble of filling out all the extra paperwork, our plan could...

??? 1: Shut up. Who do you think you’re talking to? I’d appreciate it if some measly Vampire wouldn’t take to me so casually. 

Mertz: ...My apologies.

??? 2: Did the various procedures go well? 

Mertz: Yes. 

Your enrollment as transfer students who are returning to their home country from Great Britain has been officially approved. 

At present, I believe it is highly unlikely that your true nature has been found out by that man. 

??? 2: I see. Then we will abuse the Lunar Eclipse to get our hands on the woman. 

??? 1: We’ll strike while those Vampires are all shaken up, right?

Mertz: I have arranged a manor which they will not be able to find as well.

??? 2: Yes. 

??? 1: Will we return to the Demon World once we’ve gotten our hands on her, Nii-san? 

??? 2: No. I believe there are still some things we need to investigate here. 

??? 1: ...We’re gonna kill those Vampires?

??? 2: That is part of the plan as well. However, I need to know why Karlheinz has decided to keep the woman with Founders’ blood running her veins within his grasp. (1)

??? 1: Couldn’t he just simply look up to it? 

??? 2: We do not know that yet. At one point or another, we will need to get to the bottom of it, and expose his true intentions. 

For the sake of the Founders’ future. 

??? 1: I see. 

Mertz: Well then, shall we get going? 

??? 2: Yes.

*TIMESKIP*

ー The scene resumes in the classroom

*Ding・dongー Ding・dongー Ding・dongー*

Yui: Phew, survived another day...There. 

ー The class grows restless

Yui: Hm? I wonder what’s wrong with everyone? 

Female student A: Hey, check this out! Look, the moon...

Female student B: Ah! Could it be the Lunar Eclipse? 

Yui: The Lunar Eclipse...Right, it’s today, isn’t it? 

( I’ll take a look as well! )

ー Yui walks over to the window

Yui: Waah...!

( The moon is bright red...I’ve never seen it like that... )

It’s slowly fading into the shadows...

( Even though I know the logic behind it, it’s a strange feeling somehow... )

...How pretty...

Homeroom teacher: Oi, Komori!

Yui: Y-Yes!

ー She rushes over to the teacher’s side

Yui: What’s wrong, Sensei? 

Homeroom teacher: My bad. The Principal is calling for you. He wants you to head to the special classroom pronto. 

Yui: The Principal? 

( ...I wonder why? The special classroom is in an entirely different wing of the building, isn’t it? )

( Why do they need me there? )

*TIMESKIP*

ー The scene shifts to the special classroom

*Knock knock*

Yui: ーー Excuse me. 

ー Yui enters the room

Principal: Hello there, Komori-kun. (2) I’m sorry for making you come all the way over here. 

Yui: Ah...!!

??? 2: ...

??? 1: Hey there, so we meet again. 

( I-It’s those two guys...I met the other day!? )

Principal: I’d actually like to make a very earnest request. 

Yui: Y-Yes. 

Principal: These two gentleman are called Tsukinami Carla-kun and Tsukinami Shin-kun. 

They’re brothers who have recently returned to Japan from Great Britain. 

Yui: ( ...Now that he says that, our teacher mentioned something about that the other day...I see, so these two guys are. )

Carla: I’m Carla.

Shin: Once again, the name’s Tsukinami Shin. Nice to meet you!

Yui: I’m Komori Yui. 

Um, so Sensei. What is it you’d like to ask...?

Principal: Aah, I’d like to put you in charge of these two. 

Yui: Eh...!? 

Principal: They have lived in Great Britain for a long period of time, so they’ve not quite accustomed to the Japanese ways yet. 

They personally insisted that you’d take this role, so would you please accept?

The principal from their school back in Great Britain also asked me to treat them well. 

My job is on the line here! So please, I’m begging you!

*Rustle rustle*

Yui: S-Sensei! Please...Raise your head. 

Principal: Then, can I leave them in your hands?

Yui: There is one thing I’d like to ask...

Carla: What is it? 

Yui: ...Why me? 

Shin: Isn’t that obvious?

ー Shin creeps up on her 

*Rustle rustle*

Shin: We took a liking to you. 

Yui: ...Uu...

Shin: What? Not what you wanted to hear? 

Yui: That’s not it...I just don’t understand why it has to be me...

Carla: You were the only option. 

Yui: ...!?

Principal: So, what do you say? 

Yui: Y-Yes...

Shin: Okay! It’s settled then!

Yui: Eh...!? 

Shin: ーー Say, why don’t you stop complaining and just nod your head? You wouldn’t want to get hurt now, do you?

Yui: ...!!

Shin: We’re behaving here on purpose, you see? We can’t exactly afford to rip you to shreds right here. 

Now obey. You’ve let those Vampires toy around with you like that...plenty of times, haven’t you? 

We know very well that they’ve had their merry way with you. 

Yui: Who exactly...are you?

Shin: Hehehe...

Yui: S-Sensei!!

Principal: ...I-I’m sorry! You know the circumstances so...I’m leaving the rest to you!

ー The principal runs off

Yui: Ah...!!

Carla: Hmph. What a selfish prick. 

ー Shin moves back

Shin: Oh well, whatever. Those guys are the easiest to manipulate after all. 

Aah...I guess you belong in that category as well. Hehehe.

Carla: Well then, let us get going. 

Yui: G-Go where? 

Carla: Do not play dumb. You are our attendant, remember? 

Shin: We gotta have you give us a tour of this Vampire-infested school, no? 

Yui: ( Don’t tell me...They know that the guys are Vampires as well...!? )

Carla: Shin, I will go take a look someplace else. 

Shin: Hmー? Really? I guess it’d be difficult for the two of us to go at once. 

You can go first, Nii-san. I’ll wait here..

Carla: No, you choose. 

Yui: Eh...?

Carla: It does not matter who you choose. Pick who you will show around first.  

Yui: Uu...

Carla: ...

Yui: ( I sensed this during our first meeting as well, but these two are incredibly intimidating... )

( I just don’t know what they’ll do if I try to fight back...I wonder if this is what you’d call instinctive fear? )

( ...Anyway, I better choose who to give a tour first. )

[ Choose Carla ] [ Choose Shin ]

Translation notes

(1) 囲う or ‘kakou’ literally means ‘to enclose’, but it is also used in the context of a King or an Emperor keeping a Mistress by his side. In Karlheinz’ case, he has not directly taken Yui as a Mistress, but he did drop her off with his sons. 

(2) While it may sound strange for the Principle to refer to Yui as ‘Komori-kun’ when she is a girl, there are actually two instinstances in which the ‘kun’ suffix is used. The first is amongst friends, when talking to a boy. (With ‘chan’ being the female counterpart). The second case is as a somewhat more casual/light-hearted alternative to ‘-san’ when a boss/principal/etc. is talking to one of his employees/students/etc. In this case, ‘kun’ is used for both males and females. 

[watchmegetobsessed]

Never Have I Ever - Harry Styles

this is very random and just a lil somethin’, bc i secretly dream about being on one of these shows and meeting one of my crushes lmao, not me pretending to be at an interview in my own kitchen, hah, not at all!

hi hello so im adding this after this was posted. i randomly turned this into a series so you can find further parts for this in the series masterpost!

word count: 1.8k

pairing: Harry x actress!reader

SERIES MASTERPOST

masterlist

“It’s so good to have you here, it’s been quite some time since the last time you sat in this chair, am I right?” Ellen asked with a warm smile as you nodded.

“Yeah, I’ve been busy, I guess,” you chuckle tugging your hair behind your ear.

“I mean, of course. You starred in two movies since then and even got nominated for an Emmy as well for your role in The Umbrella Academy!” she lists and the audience starts cheering on your successes. “Of course you’ve been busy, but I’m glad you had time to drop by for a talk. So, let’s talk about your upcoming movie. You’ll be co-stars with Zendaya and Finn Wolfhard, it’s a quite interesting cast.”

“Yes! I’m very excited to work with them, I just met Zendaya the other day and though I’M yet to meet Finn I’m sure we will get along well.”

“What was your first impression about Zendaya?”

“Oh, she is very sweet and funny, I think working with her will be more like just a fun activity,” you admit chuckling and Ellen nods in agreement.

“I bet. Alright. So let’s talk about quarantine, it was a rather huge part of the year, where did you spend it?”

“I went home to my family, so I quarantined with them in my hometown.”

“And what did you do mostly?”

“We played a lot of board games and my mom taught me to cook,” you admit with a shy chuckle.

“Yeah, we had the luck to see parts of that,” Ellen chuckles as a video of you and your mom in the kitchen appears on the big screen behind you. It was posted to your Instagram when she attempted to teach you how to make her famous meatloaf. “It seems like you are a natural talent in the kitchen.”

“Well, I haven’t burned it down, so it’s going fine,” you chuckle.

“Alright, and what else did you do? Seen any good movies or discovered some new artists in the world of music?”

“Oh, absolutely. I definitely watched everything I’ve been postponing and I got to listen to new music, so now I have a few new favorites,” you admit smiling.

“Have you been listening to Harry Styles lately?” she asks and you find the question a little odd and very… specific.

“I mean, yes, but it wasn’t anything new, I really like his music,” you admit truthfully. “He is a great artist for sure.”

“Have you been at any of his concerts by any chance?” she asks and you notice that the audience is getting a little excited over something, but you don’t pay too much attention to it.

“Not yet, but I hope it’s gonna happen one day.”

“Well, I think I can get you tickets to see him,” a voice speaks up from behind you and immediately, the audience starts cheering as your head snaps around and you see none other than Harry Styles standing behind you. Your mouth hangs open as you feel yourself blushing, he is so tall and handsome, dressed in a bright blue suit with a silver shirt underneath, smiling down at you widely as he walks around the armchairs to greet you.

“Oh shit, I was not expecting this,” you breathe out as you stand up and hug him shortly before he moves over to greet Ellen as well.

“’M glad you like my music, Love,” he smiles as he sits in the armchair next to you and you swear you see him wink at you.

“We thought you wouldn’t mind our other guest joining in,” Ellen explains Harry’s appearance.

“Not at all,” you smile shaking your head. Harry has been your celebrity crush for quite a while, but the two of you just never crossed paths, until now.

“’S very nice to meet yeh,” he nods in your way.

“Same goes for you.”

“Okay, so now that Harry is here, I thought that we could play a little game,” Ellen announces reaching for something next to her armchair.

“Oh man,” you breathe out earning a round of laughter from the audience. “Last time we played something you asked me the most embarrassing burning questions!” you whine thinking back how you had to admit that you sleep with your lights on when it’s raining outside.

“We’ll do something similar this time too,” she chuckles before handing out two round boards to you and Harry as well.

“Oh fo’ fuck’s sake!” Harry groans making the audience laugh again. “Not this!”

“I know you loved it when we played it the last time,” Ellen grins as Harry hides his face behind the board that’s now showing his I HAVE sign towards the cameras. “We’re gonna play Never Have I Ever, I think you both know the rules.”

“Yes, this is why I want to run away now,” you mumble under your breath.

“I’m going with yeh,” Harry smirks at you finally letting his board drop to his knees. Seemingly, the audience is enjoying your misery.

“Don’t be babies, it’s gonna be fun!” “For who? Not me!” Harry exclaims making everyone in the studio laugh. “Should’ve asked what we’re gonna do before I said yes.”

“Too late, Harry. Alright, let’s start,” Ellen announces as she takes her card in her hands, picking the first one and she reads the lines on it. “Never have I ever had a crush on someone I worked with.”

You huff as you turn your board so the I HAVE side is facing the camera, while Ellen has the same side showing, but Harry shows the I HAVE NEVER.

“Never?” you ask Harry.

“Well, what do yeh mean by working with?” he asks with narrow eyes as he taps on his chin.

“Anyone you had any relations with through a job.”

“Well then…” he sighs turning the board, earning some cheering.

“Okay. Never have I ever drunk texted someone and regretted it in the morning,” Ellen continues with the next question.

“Oh, too often,” you blurt out holding up the I HAVE side.

“What did yeh write?” Harry asks with a cheeky smile while he holds up the same side.

“Well, there are just too many, I can’t choose,” you admit laughing. “I often tend to write down my feelings when I had a little too much to drink and then send it without a second thought.”

“Then I better get yeh drunk to find out what yeh think about me,” Harry teases and you hear a loud “ooh” coming from the audience while you can only hope your make up covers the blush on your cheeks.

“I’d need your number for that to happen,” you say arching an eyebrow at him.

“That’s something we can easily fix,” he smirks.

“Okay, before the two of you go on your first date right away, let’s finish the game,” Ellen jokes and you both turn to her. “Never have I ever kissed someone I didn’t know.”

“What do you mean by knowing someone?” you ask to clarify.

“Let’s say you didn’t even know their name,” she adds and as you think about it, you hold up the I HAVE NEVER side first, but then flip it over.

“Oh, something popped into yeh mind?” Harry teases while he holds up the I HAVE side as well.

“I guess I just want to forget about it, but I can’t,” you admit chuckling awkwardly.

“Were you drunk or you just didn’t care to ask for their name?” Ellen questions.

“I’ve had quite a few drinks if I’m being honest. But I think he told me his name, I just didn’t catch it,” you admit.

“Poor guy, he is completely forgotten,” Harry chimes in shaking his head in a dramatic way.

“Alright, we have two more questions. Never have I ever had a friend with benefits.”

“This game sucks!” you snap as you hold up the I HAVE side, making the audience laugh. “You’re making me look like such a bad person!” you whine to Ellen.

“Don’t feel so bad, Harry is in the same shoe!” she chuckles and turning to the man on your right you see that Harry has the same side showing and a very cheeky smirk on his lips.

“How did it end?” you ask out of curiosity. You know how yours ended, in a horrible fight, because he wanted more, but you were in it just for the fun.

“Not in the best way, if I’m bein’ honest,” he clears his throat leaning back in his seat. “How about yours?”

“Same,” you nod chuckling.

“I guess it was a learning lesson for the both of you,” Ellen smirks before reading the last question. “Never have I ever ghosted somebody.”

“Shit,” you mumble, trying to hide your smirk as you hold up the I HAVE side. Harry thinks to himself before doing the same. Leaning forward he checks yours and your eyes meet for a moment.

“I think it would be an honor to anyone to be ghosted by yeh,” he teases you making you roll your eyes. “Wha’? ‘M telling the truth!” he chuckles.

“Wanna get on the list of my ghosted people?” you joke raising your eyebrows at him and he immediately holds his hands up.

“Would rather not.” He places a hand over his heart before smiling in your way sweetly. “Tha’ would break m’ heart.”

“Oh come on!” you chuckle feeling the heat crawling up your neck and cheeks as the audience lets out a soft “aww” at his words.

“Alright, thank you for playing, I think we found out some interesting things about the both of you.”

“Thanks for embarrassing us,” you add mumbling as you hand her back the board.

“It was a pleasure,” she chuckles. “We’ll be right back after a short break, please stay with us, we have more from Y/N and Harry coming right in your way, so stay tuned!” she announces as the crowd cheers.

“Friends with benefits, huh?” Harry asks smirking in your way as you fix your dress. You just shrug your shoulder trying to look casual when you feel so intimidated sitting next to him.

“Had to try it, I guess,” you admit.

“I get it,” he chuckles. “So, if I were to ask for yeh number, would I eventually be ghosted as well?”

You have to bite into your bottom lip to hide your growing smile at his attempt to flirt with you.

“We’ll see. You gotta ask for it first,” you tell him with a knowing smile, hoping to look flirty and light, not the nervous wreck that you truly feel like talking to him.

“I think my dressing room is two doors down yours, so expect me to drop by after this,” he smirks, making your heart skip a beat before Ellen starts speaking and the taping continues.

NEXT PART

[dream-a-little-bigger-x]

Quarantine Lovers | Charlie Gillespie

Requested by anon: Can we have a Charlie x reader where she is his secret quarantine partner and the cast keeps guessing who it is until Maddie names a famous writer and gets it right? Thanks!

Pairing: Charlie Gillespie x Female!Reader

Warnings: fluff

A/N: I’m not sure if this is what you wanted but i kinda like it haha

Charlie has always been secretive about his private life. It’s always been his one thing he promised himself. Work life and private life needs to be separate. Especially in the industry he’s in now. You and Charlie have been together for a couple of months now and nobody knows. It all started when he’d finished filming Julie and The Phantoms and came back to Dieppe from Vancouver. He went for a hike with one of his brothers when they found you sitting on a rock, clutching your ankle. 

“Hey, are you okay?” his voice made you look up. You offered him a polite smile, trying not to show your pain or the fact you were thinking ‘Holy crap, attractive”. “Yeah, just threw my ankle a little bit on the rocks over there,” you pointed to a few feet behind the boys. “Was waiting for it to blow over and I could go on, but I’ve been sat here for…” you checked your watch, “About half an hour.” You chuckled at your own pathetic behavior. “I used to be really good at these hikes, you know?” Charlie then chuckled too, mostly at how endearing you were. 

“Can you stand on it a little bit if we support you?” Patrick, Charlie’s brother, asked then. 

“I’m not sure…” The two guys walked up to you, each taking a hand of yours to pull you up, and then wrapping one arm around your waist. You could go like that for about a kilometer until your foot began to throb again. “Can we take a break?” you squeak. Charlie and Patrick placed you onto a tree trunk very gingerly and took a seat next to you. 

“Are you from around here?” Charlie then asked.

“Yeah, I live in Moncton with my best friend,” you replied with a smile, glad he’s distracting you from the pain in your ankle. 

“No way! We live in Dieppe!” The excitement on his face was the most adorable thing you’d ever seen.  Your eyes and smile widen at this, not necessarily at the fact he lives kind of close, but at the excitement on his face. 

“Cool! I have family in Dieppe, so I know my way around there,” you told them. Charlie and Patrick nodded their heads at this, not entirely sure what else to say to this stranger they just picked up from a rock in the middle of nowhere. 

“So, what’s your name?” Charlie then asked upon reminding himself of this fact. “Y/N Y/L/N,” you replied. 

“Charlie Gillespie, and this is my brother, Patrick,” he introduced himself and his brother, who gave you a little wave. The wind suddenly picked up, and you knew exactly what that meant. 

“It’s going to rain soon. We better get going.” Charlie and Patrick nodded their heads agreeingly and helped you up from the trunk. 

“Get on my back,” Charlie then suggested. “It’s going to go quicker than you hopping along with us.” You hesitated for a few seconds, but then decided you agreed with him. Patrick helped you jump on Charlie’s back, and the three of you continued your walk down the trail, chatting about your lives the whole way down. 

You found out Charlie was an actor and had just finished filming about a month ago, and you told him you were a screenwriter. Your most recent work was on Outer Banks and Season two of Umbrella Academy. You talked about your hopes and dreams and agreed the industry you both were in was a tough one.

From that day on, the two of you have been pretty inseparable. You became really close friends and spent a lot of time together before he finally asked you out on a first date. Then came more and more dates, and then came March 2020. Quarantine. And since Charlie had been spending most of his nights at your place since your best friend was with their parents, you both decided to quarantine together. 

No one knew about your relationship. Not even his friends from the cast of Julie and The Phantoms. Only his family knew, and that’s all that mattered right now. No one knew you two were spending lockdown together at your place, and you could keep it a secret for a very long time. Charlie liked it this way, though the cast had been texting and calling non-stop because they knew he wasn’t home in Dieppe. 

When September 10th hit, and he could finally show you the work he’d done on Julie and The Phantoms. 

“What do you think, Baby?” he asked every five minutes when you were cuddled up on the couch watching it together. 

“Stop asking me that question, Char,” you giggled and pressed a kiss to his cheek. You were fine for most of the show, chuckling at the ghost jokes or pretty much anything Reggie did, bopping your head along to the catchy songs. And then Unsaid Emily hit. “Oh, no…” you whined as the music started to play and on-screen-Charlie started to sing the sad song. The Charlie next to you chuckled, endeared by your investment in the show, and wrapped his arms tighter around you whilst kissing your head multiple times. “HOW DARE THEY END THIS LIKE THAT?!” You screamed at the very end, making Charlie love you even more. Afterwards, he listened to all of your theories and your predictions for season 2. 

Thus far, quarantine is going really well at the Y/L/N-Gillespie Quarantine Residence.

The couple of weeks after the release of Julie and The Phantoms, Charlie had to do a lot of zoom calls for interviews. Sometimes even multiple a day. You made sure you were never in sight during those interviews, sometimes even leaving the house for a walk, but today, you decided to stay home and work on a script for an episode of season 2 of

Outer Banks.

You were sat on the sofa with your laptop and all your notes while Charlie was doing his interview in the bedroom. You could hear him talk to his castmates and the interviewer, and you often had to pause your writing because you wanted to hear what he was talking about.

“Where have you been spending quarantine?” the interviewer asked. Most of them said home with their families, and even Charlie said ‘home’. This answer melted your heart just a tiny bit.

“That’s a lie, Charlie,” Madison said with a giggle. “Charlie has a secret quarantine partner and doesn’t want to say who!”

“I am spending time with family, exploring Dieppe. I don’t know where you get your information from, Mads.” Though Charlie was a good actor, he couldn’t hide the fact he was lying to his own friends. Even you could hear how flustered he was.

“OK, I wanted to start with a couple of the fans’ questions that they sent in,” the interviewer continued, either ignoring the banter and the big piece of gossip they could get out of this, or not having heard it. “Someone asked who you’d love to work with on a next season.”

“Actor wise, I want to do scenes with Cheyenne Jackson,” Madison replies, “I didn’t get to do any scenes with him this season, but he’s really talented and I’d love to work with him. And I also have a writer that would be really great to work with on our show and that’s Y/N Y/L/N. She worked on Outer Banks and Umbrella Academy, and I loved the episodes she wrote.” Charlie’s face at the mention of your name is priceless. His eyes widen first before his mouth curled up into a smile, though he tried to hide it from his castmates and the interviewer. 

Madison and Owen glanced into the camera knowingly but decided not to say anything and continue with the interview. It’s when that interview was done, Madi, Owen and Jeremy called Charlie in a group FaceTime.

“It’s Y/N, isn’t it?!” You heard Madison scream from Charlie’s phone as he walked into the living room where you were working. He gave you a questioning look, as if asking for permission to tell them. You simply nodded encouragingly.

“Yes, okay, fine! You figured it out!” The three on the other side of the line cheered loudly, making you chuckle slightly. “You want to meet the cast, Babe?” he asked you whilst making his way over. You patted the spot next to you for him to sit down, and he obeyed, showing you the screen of his phone.

“Hey, guys!” you greeted with a wave. A chorus of ‘hi’ and ‘hey’ meets your ears. “How’d you figure it out?” You asked them, placing your laptop on the coffee table to get more comfortable. You tucked your feet underneath you, placing your elbow on the back of the couch and gliding your fingers into Charlie’s long, lockdown-hair.

“First of all, I follow you on Instagram, Y/N, and I saw the two of you tagged the same location on the same day once, and your last pictures kind of look similar. So, I had a bit of a hunch, but I wasn’t sure, and when I mentioned you in the interview, he got all flustery and happy and I just knew!” You gave the girl an impressed nod.

“We literally just hung up on the interviewer when Madi texted us ‘IT’S Y/N!!’ in all caps,” Jeremy added with a smile. Defeated, and a little embarrassed, Charlie groaned and hid his face in the crook of your neck, seeking comfort.

“We won’t tell anyone, Char. We’re just happy for you,” says Owen with a smile, “And us, because now Madi won’t be texting us non-stop with all her theories on who your quarantine partner is.” All of you chuckled a that, except for Madison, she glared at her blonde-haired friend through the screen.

“You all wanted to know!” she snarled.

All of you chatted for a couple hours until Charlie and you got hungry and decided to prepare dinner.

“It was nice to meet you, Y/N! Hopefully we’ll see each other soon IRL!” Madison said with the biggest smile on her face.

“It was nice to meet you too, guys! Ooh, by the way! I loved the show!” you complimented.

“Of course you did,” said Owen with a suggestive wiggle of his eyebrows.

“Bye guys!” you waved at them, completely ignoring Owen’s statement. Charlie hung up the phone and put his phone on the coffee table before turning to you. “Madison would be a good detective,” you pointed out with a grin. Charlie glared at you, which just made you giggle and kiss his lips. At least now you didn’t need to keep it a secret from his friends. Almost like a weight off your shoulders.

Taglist: @hannahhistorian92​ @marinettepotterandplagg​ @thequirkybookaholic​ @parkeret​​ @lukeys-giggle​ @gingerxarmy​ @lovesanimals​

[number5theboy]

I’ve seen it mentioned by people before about how weirdly easy it seems for the siblings to just accept Five as a master assassin and it’s been giving me thoughts. Because in the comics he obviously has that whole being spliced with serial killers thing, but that’s not a thing in the show. And there’s also really not a lot of implication that the commission gave him a bunch of training or skills.

The show fandom tends to act as if his skills comes from 40 some years of experience, but he was actually only an assassin for a few years. Before that he certainly had to develop some serious survival skills, but that would really be more about foraging and shelter. All the fighting for survival he did was Five vs. the elements, not Five vs. enemy combatants.

So that seems like it would imply that most of his abilities in that area were developed before his time in the apocalypse. Which all goes to make me wonder just how ruthless of a fighter he was as a kid, and what his siblings saw in him that make them totally willing to accept him being an assassin without any need for more explanation???

I mean, there isn't a lot of implication, but Five straight-up calls himself a "trained assassin" and Lila asks the Handler whether Five is "the best assassin the Commission's ever produced", so the training he definitely got at Commission. The reason he's so good, the best, arguably, and I've talked about that before, is that the assassin skills were just building on the world's most solid base of survival skills. The fights that aren't straight-up ordered assassinations he approaches with a mindset more akin to 'I will survive, and I will do anything it takes to do so' rather than 'you will die, and I will do anything it takes to do so'. It's the attitude that got him through the apocalypse, and if that now includes killing people, something he's already familiar with from the Umbrella Academy days, and gets trained in more precisely by the Commission, then so be it. I don't really think most of these skills were carried over from his childhood, necessarily. He's just quick to adapt, an ability repeatedly highlighted in the show.

As for why it barely fazes his siblings to learn that he is an assassin? If you just go Ockham's razor, it's because the writers needed the plot to move forward, and if all the characters constantly question the guy who narratively is mostly in charge of moving the plot, you're not getting anywhere. They got the reasonable doubt out of the way when Vanya didn't believe him about the apocalypse, so having that beat of doubt and disbelief repeated ad infinitum would have made Season 1 boring. Fun fact: if you go off the show canon, Vanya, after 2 whole seasons, technically still doesn't know Five is an assassin, because she was never present when it was discussed.

If you look at it from a character perspective, I don't really think it's because he must've been a merciless killer in his childhood already. The only time we see him fight as a kid, he is very clearly the least overtly violent of the five kids (Luther throws a guy through an upper-storey-window, Diego stabs a man in the chest, Allison rumours one to shoot his friend in the foot, Ben slaughters a room full of people, and Five hits someone. With a stapler.). This is, of course, in service of the Istanbul (Not Constantinople) twist at the end of that episode, contrasting Five then to Five now, a ruthless little war machine. I think the foundations of what Five could become were there, the behaviours shown were all things that later became amplified, but he was not especially vicious or cruel.

The way I interpret their ready belief is that they know that Five is not a liar. He's many things, but he is, and always has been, very straightforward, very arrogant, very scientific and very self-centered. He doesn't lie, he doesn't embellish, he tells things as he sees them, no matter who he's talking to, and he has a grip on what he's doing. He did it with Reginald when he was small, and that directness hasn't changed when he comes back. His siblings probably were thinking along the lines of 'what does he have to gain by making this all up?'. Klaus straight-up didn't care whether he was telling the truth or not, he was just along for the ride, and then he got kidnapped and found out the truth the hard way. Diego saw someone he loved die because of Five, and a trail of bodies is a good indicator of whether someone has made enemies or is making everything up. Luther heard Five's entire story - and believes him - and Allison is the last to learn about it while her brothers are already convinced of Five telling the truth.

[emwritesfootball]

Her Majesty's Men 6 | Mason Mount

Word Count: 1,317

Warnings: an almost kiss and Declan hooking up with someone

- - -

Two Weeks Later…

Your doorbell rings unexpectedly, and you find yourself begrudgingly answering it. You gasp in surprise when you find Mason standing on the other side, looking at you shyly.

“Decs is asleep,” you say by way of a greeting, unable to keep the disdain out of your voice.

“I know,” Mason replies, giving you a small smile. “I was hoping you’d wanna go to the Eye with me today…?”

You give him a look. “Really?”

“Yeah.” He huffs out a laugh, running his hand through his unstyled hair, which makes you realize that this is the first time you’ve ever seen him without his hair unstyled in...forever. “So...come out with me?”

And that’s how you find yourself on the London Eye at sunset, sitting across from Mason. The two of you have made a day of being tourists in London, exploring all that the city has to offer. There’s a part of you that’s happy Mason didn’t make it as a footballer, loving the opportunity to get to walk through London completely anonymous. You’d been preparing yourself for fame-by proxy ever since Declan had announced his dream of becoming a famous footballer to your parents one rainy spring morning, and for a long time you’d thought it was going to happen.

“So, what’s next?” You asked, curious. “Dec is so secretive about the future and I’m not sure if it’s because he knows and doesn’t want me to worry or because he doesn’t know and knows I’ll worry.”

“Well, Stonesy’s got plans - big plans, apparently. He knows how popular we are, and he wants to expand us. He’s always talking about taking us on tour, but we need funding. There’s rumours he’s planning some sort of fundraiser but there’s no definite answer yet. Stonesy’s...not the best when it comes to figuring out the logistics. I was doing the books for a while but when I saw all the holes in the financials and told him about it, he wasn’t happy and got the bartender on his side and she’s now doing all that. I’m not sure what she’s telling him but he seems more optimistic about it than before.”

“So, assuming everything gets off the ground, are you going with them, then? Is Dec?” You felt a pang of something, wanting to reach out and hold Mason’s hand - or kiss him.

“Dec is more a part of this than I am. Me? I want out of this life eventually. Yeah, sure, I make almost as much money as I would’ve made if I’d been able to sign a contract with Chelsea - or a Championship club on the slower nights - but I’d like to, I don’t know, coach or something. I still wanna be involved in the world of football however I can be. Tarzan Ty has plans to open his own football academy with his money and I’d love to be a part of that. For right now, though, until I get a clear handle on my life, I’m just gonna be Money Mase.”

You didn’t overthink it this time, placing a hand on his forearm. “Oh, Mason, you’re so much more than Money Mase - I hope you know that.”

Mason gave you a soft smile, the action making your stomach dip. “Thanks.” His gaze flickered from your eyes to your lips and he leaned down.

You were about to let him kiss you but you placed a hand on his chest, stepping back. “Mason...we can’t.”

“We can.”

“You’re my baby brother’s best friend, Mase. We can’t.”

“But we want to.”

You swallowed hard, biting down on your bottom lip. “Yes, we want to, but that doesn’t mean that we should.”

“Fine.” Mason ran a finger down your cheek and you sucked in a breath. “But we are going to kiss someday and when we do, it’ll take your breath away. Okay?”

“Okay,” you breathed, nodding.

***

“All right, all right, all right. Tonight’s the night, lads!” Stonesy clapped his hands together, rubbing them like some sort of shirtless, ripped movie villain. “The investors are here and they are primed and ready for you. Show them what we can bring to the rest of England, and maybe the world!”

“God, he’s corrupt with power,” Tarzan Ty mumbled under his breath as he finished rubbing the contour into his abs to define them just a little bit more.

“He’s just got a vision,” Declan defended, buttoning up the trenchcoat.

“Yeah, a demented one.” Jacky Boy growled, rolling his eyes as he reached for the umbrella.

Mason stood silent, reading the room. Declan seemed to be the only one blinded by Stonesy’s smoke and mirrors, but Mason didn’t know how to tell him otherwise. Declan had thrown himself into the flashy world of male entertainment, trading the screams of a crowded stadium for the cheers of horny women, and Mason didn’t know how to get him out. Mason knew he wanted more out of life, but Declan seemed content to just live in this world. A part of Mason wanted to just let Declan be, but the other part - the part that was slowly falling for you even though the two of you hadn’t even kissed yet - wanted to save him. “Hey, Decs, can I talk to you?” He asked, placing a hand on his ex-teammate’s arm.

“Uh yeah, sure. Now?”

Just as Mason was about to respond, Stonesy cut in. “Let’s get out there, boys! Show these high-powered investors what we’ve got!”

~~~

“Was that...Victoria Beckham I saw in the crowd during our opener?” Jacky Boy asked, loosening the tie from around his neck. It was the only thing he still had on, besides his thong, his body slick with sweat after the ‘Raining Men’ routine they’d just finished. “Posh Spice - more like Sexy Spice, goddamn.”

“She’s one of the investors?” Tarzan Ty said, reaching for his hand drum for his classic Tarzan routine.

“Her and all of her lady friends,” Stonesy chimed in, smirking. “I pulled a few strings. You’re all welcome, lads. Just don’t screw it up.”

The only one brave enough to go near Victoria Beckham was Declan, the rest of Her Majesty’s Men watching in awe - mixed with a little bit of fear - as he sauntered over to her and took her hand, leading her onstage. Hot seats were a blur, Declan’s sole focus on Victoria as he gyrated his hips against her, fulfilling a fantasy for her.

When she cornered him at the end of the night, he was surprised. “You were...magnetic up there,” she murmured, a look in her eyes that had Declan pausing.

“I, uh, thank you. Does this mean that you’re donating?”

Victoria placed a hand on his chest, pressing him up against the wall. “Darling, I’m funding the whole thing,” she purred, nibbling his earlobe.

“Wow,” Declan breathed, chuckling nervously. “What does your husband think?”

“David will find out soon enough. For now, I’d like to have a little fun - celebrate my new investment, don’t you think?”

“Yes, you should celebrate.”

“With you.” Victoria dragged her index finger down his sternum, smirking. “I’ve invested in your little show, which makes you my investment...and I’d like to make sure you’re able to return dividends.”

“What about David? The man’s a legend, I can’t-”

“David and I love each other very much, but sometimes we need to have a little fun separately.” Victoria stepped back, giving him a sultry once-over. “So, Dangerous Deccers, what do you say we have a little fun?”

Declan didn’t hesitate after that, gripping her hips and pulling her into him. Victoria matched him, kiss for kiss, eventually taking charge. She was over twice his age, but that didn’t stop Declan from taking her to the back room, letting her lay him back on the futon as she proceeded to show him just how she planned on investing in him.

<< >>

[can-youimagine]

Always (Diego Hargreeves x Reader)

Summary: When everything falls apart, Diego can always count on you to make things right

TW: season 2 spoilers (under the cut), mild swearing, angst

Word Count: 1070

Masterlist

Diego knew he was in the wrong timeline. He knew that he couldn’t go back to his normal life. He knew that no one from April 1st was going to recognize him now. But, when he saw you, he forgot all of that.

“(Y/N)!” he yells before he realizes what he’s doing. “(Y/N)!”

You stop midstep and turn to him. You look around, but when you don’t see anyone familiar, you resume your walk back to your apartment. Once again, Diego stops you. This time, though, he runs in front of you. “(Y/N), oh God. I’ve missed you so much.” He embraces you in a hug, and you’re not sure whether you should hug him back or run away. When he starts crying, you have your answer.

“I’m sorry, have we met?”

He pulls away with the most pained expression on his face. Not having his father recognize him was one thing, but not having you, the woman who he loved more than anything who he was convinced died, recognize him hurt him more than anything.

He stutters out the beginnings of about a million sentences. “Are you okay?” you hesitantly ask, wishing that you hadn’t treated yourself to a donut and had instead stayed at home.

“It’s me, Diego, remember?” He was nearing the point of hysteria now. 

“I’m sorry,” you shake your head. “I don’t remember you. Could you give me a hint?”

“We’ve been dating for three years. We met right here. You-you-you, don’t remember me.” It’s not a question. He finally drops his arms, taking a step back. “I’m sorry to bother you. I just-you wouldn’t believe me.”

“I’m willing to try.” You feel entirely impossible for this stranger’s mental descent, and you almost owe it to him to hear him out.

“It’s a long story, and you have to get back to your cat because it’s nearly ten, and she hates when you are out too long.”

“How do you know about my cat?”

“I’m telling you, (Y/N), I know you.”

“Fine, if you know me so well,” you give in, “show up at my apartment at eight, bring my favorite flowers and a bottle of wine.”

You have never seen a person look more relieved. “Yes, of course! Thank you! I’ll tell you everything, I promise. Now get back to Lady Macbeth.”

“I’ll see you at eight, Diego,” you say before rushing back to your apartment.

You spend the rest of the day getting ready for your meeting with Diego. You are quite certain that you have completely lost all self-preservation instincts. 

You finally hear a knock at the door, right at eight o’clock. “Punctual,” you greet, opening the door for Diego.

“You always are.”

You nod. “And my flowers?”

“I know you don’t like flowers-smart of you for trying to trick me, though-so I thought, what would (Y/N) appreciate? Even if you won’t admit it, I know you love cheesy gimmicks, so I got you this.” He holds out a small box that contains artfully arranged skewers with candy bars that look like flowers. “I thought you would like a Reese’s Cup flower better.”

You take the candy from him. He is quite convincing. He’s either a very thorough stalker, or he’s telling the truth. “And the wine?”

Again, he holds up your favorite bottle. One that is way too expensive for you to justify buying for yourself. “So, can I come in?” You nod, stepping out of the doorway. He makes his way to your couch, patting the stop next to him for you to sit. “This is going to take a while.”

You pour yourself an overly full glass of wine before sitting next to him. “I’m sure I’ll need this.”

“I, shit, I should have thought about what I was going to say,” he says. “I-um-I’m from another timeline.”

Your eyes widen, but you say nothing.

He realizes that that may not have been the best approach and begins telling you all about the end of the world, the time travel, the Umbrella Academy.

When you start asking questions, his face falls.

“I-I don’t know,” he answers before sighing. “I knew you wouldn’t believe me. I’m sorry for wasting your time. I’ll just leave.” He starts to stand up, but you grab his arm, gently pulling him back down.

“You really must have loved me.”

“I still do,” he admits, still not sitting with you.

“I wish I could help you. I want to believe you. It’s just a lot, y’know?” Since he refuses to look you in the eye, you stand up, placing your hands on his shoulders. “I’m really trying, though.”

“You have no reason to trust me. You shouldn’t have even let me in.”

“No, I shouldn’t have, but generally when an unstable stranger carrying way too many knives hugs you in the street, that’s when you get murdered. Not when you invite him in for wine and candy.” When you get a small smile out of him, you grin. “Now, will you sit with me and try to fix this?”

He nods. “I’ll try.”

“That’s all I ask.”

He smiles again. “You are exactly the same in every universe.”

“I hope that’s a compliment,” you joke, loving seeing him smile.

“It is.” He sits back down with you, draping his arm over the back of the couch.

The silent invitation is more than enough for you. You sit next to him, laying your head on his chest. “So, what are you like?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, you seem to know all about me. What about you?”

He takes a deep breath. “Well, for one, I’m not much of a cuddler.” When you make a move to leave, he pulls you closer. “But, you are the exception to the rule.”

“Good. I was wondering why I ever dated you.”

He explains more about himself: his family, the boxing, his powers, everything. “Any questions?”

“Can you show me the knife thing?”

“Always the same,” he laughs. “What are you okay with me stabbing?”

“An apple work?”

“Perfect.”

You grab an apple from the kitchen. “Where do you want it?”

Instead of answering, he throws a knife, hitting the center of the apple. Impressed and mildly terrified, you set the apple down. “I gotta say, this is adding incredible amounts of credibility to your stories.”

“So, you believe me?”

“I’m starting to.”

[cogentranting]

So I’ve seen some complaints about the finale not having Klaus conjure a ghost army to fight the Commission. And I’ve seen some good rebuttals as to why maybe he didn’t (mainly revolving around his ptsd and the strain on him through the season). And while I think that’s a really good, valid point, I think there’s another reason:

He can’t yet. 

But he’s done it before. No. He’s conjured one ghost to fight for him, and two to hold him up. He’s talked to more ghosts before than that, but he’s never made more than two corporeal at a time. In fact, those two cowboys that caught him in the finale are the first time he is able to make more than just Ben corporeal. In this timeline that’s the most he’s ever done with that aspect of his power. So it’s not a safe assumption to say that he is capable at this point in the story of multiplying that by 100 or 1000 or 10000. Because logically that would be a much more significant expenditure of his power. 

But we saw him do it in the opening fight of the season. Yes. But in that season opener we saw all of them (minus Five and Ben) operating with significant upgrades to their powers and the way they fight and yet none of them have reached that upgrade in the main timeline of the season. Something about having Five present in the timeline this time around changed things so that they never learned how to push themselves to that point. 

Allison is the clearest-- we see Allison using her power again, but what she did in the opener was completely different. She wasn’t using mind control, she was actual using her voice to create a real physical effect (blowing up heads). And in the main timeline she hasn’t come close to doing anything like that, or even attempting it, much less doing it with the confidence shown in the opener. 

Luther- in the opener it’s not necessarily using his power in a new way (because what can you do with super strength that’s new?) but he’s learned to use it in a really effective way and taking a massive hit unscathed and we don’t see him doing anything similar in the finale fight. 

Vanya- vanya maybe has reached the level of the fight from the opener (she’s certainly closer to it than she was) but I might still argue that she doesn’t have the full control that she demonstrates in the opener, since the blast she uses to take out the army doesn’t require much finesse. 

Diego- He DOES take a big step forward with his power by stopping the bullets, but he ISN’T at the level from the opener. Stopping all the bullets and then just kind of throwing them off to one side takes much less control and finesse than what he did in the opener-- he took control of about eight different bullets coming from different directions, and instead of just moving them away from himself, he redirected them into individual new targets, hitting each one perfectly, while doing a twisty front flip off a car (compared to the intense concentration of the finale). 

So it seems safe to assume that Klaus is on the same page as the rest of his siblings and has not gotten his big upgrade yet. 

WHY did the writers tease their potential and then not have them reach it this season? I’m not sure. It seems like it’s an idea they’re planting to be paid off later (hopefully next season, not even later). 

My best guess at what that is: The Sparrow Academy is going to be a team closer to their peak potential. The Umbrella Academy mostly stopped pushing themselves to develop their powers pretty early on (possibly because of Five’s disappearance). Facing the Sparrows will be the impetus for them exploring their powers more deeply. But the beginning of season 2 was the best opportunity to give Five a glimpse of what that potential IS. Him having had that glimpse will be instrumental in getting the others to realize that they haven’t fully explored their potential yet (instead of just... concluding that the Sparrow’s are better than they are). 

[angst-fairygodmother]

Light Fingers (The Umbrella Academy)

Diego’s vigilantism brings him repeatedly across the path of a young cat burglar. But as he finds himself developing feelings for the thief, he begins to wonder if there’s more to her than meets the eye, and whether they’re really on opposite sides. And as their relationship deepens, it brings with it a plot involving his estranged adopted father, and threatens to destroy all of them.

EPILOGUE: A HOUSE DIVIDED

Word Count: 1451 Pairing: Diego Hargreeves x Reader Rating: T Content Warnings: swearing, references to violence (canon-typical), heavy angst  Cross-posted to AO3: here

Previous Chapter: Darkness Falls || Masterlist

A/N: Thank you to everyone who has stuck by me, read, reblogged, commented, messaged. I don’t know where I’d be without all of you (probably still back at chapter 3). While this is the end of Light Fingers, it is not the end of the story. I just need to take a little time and approach canon with care.

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A week of radio silence followed that night. As the days went by, you tried your best to return to your normal, to waiting tables and bantering with kitchen staff and trying to pretend you weren’t holding yourself together by a thread. 

Something immediately felt off as you entered the apartment one night after a double shift and dropped your keys by the door. Conjuring enough light to see and no more, you began creeping through the room. It didn't take long to see that all of Diego's things were gone - except Duncan, the dog snoozing blissfully on the couch. You weren’t surprised. After all, if he’d wanted to put things back together, or thought you could, he would have reached out before now. So instead he had quickly and quietly removed his presence from your apartment, and very likely walked out of your life without a word. The thought stung, that for all you had intertwined your lives, he was still able to remove himself in a day. 

The light on your answering machine was blinking, and numbly you hit the button and listened to Patch’s message. 

~

“Thank you for finally returning my call,” Eudora said exasperatedly, as she took a seat across from you in the little cafe the following Sunday.

“Sorry Dora,” you offered her a sheepish and regretful half-smile. “I haven’t really felt like seeing anyone lately. Besides, I didn’t want to put you in an awkward place. I know you and Diego were, are…”

“Close? The three of us all were. Why do you think I’ve been trying to reach you?”

You looked down, tracing the wood grains of the tabletop. “There’s no fixing this one, Dora. We’re...too far gone.”

“How? You two were good for each other. A blind man could see it.”

“Irreconcilable differences.”

“We both know that’s bullshit, Y/N.”

“I...made a choice. One Diego couldn’t agree with. We fought about it. And when he decided to walk out, I not only let him, I practically packed his bags. And in the end it turned out to be pointless anyway.”

Yesterday’s paper had contained an article about how the investigation into Reginald had been dropped for lack of foundation, and he’d been able to collect a substantial insurance payout for the warehouse, and the feds had offered an official statement of apology on top of everything else. You had scared a local alley cat with the tantrum that had followed reading that. Because of course, trying to take him down had cost you everything and he’d still won in the end. How else could it have gone?

“Why do I bother,” Eudora sighed with a frustrated gesture. “I should have known you’d be just as cryptic as he was.”

“It’s complicated, Dora, so it’s easier than trying to explain and sounding completely nuts. I wish I could tell you. But the details don’t really matter, just that I fucked up, big time, and I can’t undo it.”

She reached across the table to take one of your fidgeting hands in her own. “Y/N. Listen to me. I know you and I know Diego. It’s not too late for the two of you. I can tell how much you both still care.”

“It’s not about that,” you struggled to keep back your tears. “We just weren’t meant to be. Forcing it will only break things worse.”

You winced, the words sounding harsh and a little bit fake. But they were true, or at least that’s what you wanted to convince yourself of so that you could move on. 

“Besides, he came by when I was at work and took all his stuff. Doesn’t that pretty much scream final?”

“I’ve talked to him, Y/N. I’ve seen him. He’s really messed up. And I don't think he's eating much or sleeping at all if I'm being honest.”

“Why are you telling me this?” your voice trembled, heart breaking with every word. 

“You could find him, probably at the Lion,” she fixed you with a look and tilted her head to one side. “You could talk to him.”

You shook your head. “There's nothing left to say.” 

“You're really giving up that easily?”

You wanted to scream, or to somehow explain that it was anything but easy. But that it was the right thing to do. For Diego’s sake. He, and she, would understand someday, you had to believe that.

“Eudora, please.”

“Fine. If neither of you is going to fight for this, I guess I should just deliver you his message.”

Despite yourself, your heart leapt at the idea Diego actually had something left to say. And then it plummeted a moment later when you realized that whatever it was, he couldn’t say himself, he had to ask your mutual best friend to do it for him. 

“I’m sorry, that you’re stuck in the middle. You don’t...have to be our carrier pigeon. If you don’t want to,” you said sheepishly, shrugging slightly. 

“If I don’t, you wouldn’t communicate at all.”

“That might--”

“If you say it’s for the best, I will walk out,” Eudora snapped, making you reel back in shock. “I hate the cryptic non-answers, but at least it’s not full-on lying to me. So don’t start.” 

You swallowed down whatever you were going to say and sighed. “You said you had a message from Diego?”

“He asked me to give you these,” she laid a set of keys on the table. “Said the apartment was your home and he’d never dream of trying to take it in whatever divorce papers you end up filing. And that he picked up his things, which I know you saw. Anything he left behind, he said, is not important.”

You looked down at the keys, letting some of the tears you’d fought so hard against fall. 

‘He left me behind,’ you wanted to say. ‘He left us.’ But that wouldn’t be fair, or help anything, so you bit your tongue. 

“Y/N,” she sounded apologetic but you could tell she no more knew the words to say than you did. Instead after a moment, she carried on. “He also said that a gym is no place for a boxer, which I think was him trying to make a joke, and that at least if you keep Duncan, he’ll know there’s someone watching your back and making sure you come home.”

You couldn’t help your snort of disbelief or the bitter tone of your response. “As if I’m the one to worry about there, not him with his stupid vigilante crime-fighting bullshit. I only ever got involved in that because of him, for him.” Somehow, that was the thing that opened the floodgates and you began to cry in earnest. “Fuck, Dora. He’s going to get himself killed someday.”

She reached over to take your hand again, giving it a comforting squeeze. Silence reigned over you for a few minutes, while she let you cry it out and offered you quiet support. 

“He won’t,” she said, eventually. “We both know he’s careful, and insanely lucky. And…” she sighed, rolling her eyes. “I’m not going to leave him completely on his own. I’m in line for an early promotion, and then I’ll be able to have people looking out for him.”

You offered her a watery smile, almost laughing. “I don’t know what I’d do, or either of us would, without you.”

She shrugged. “Good thing you won’t ever find out.”

The rest of the conversation flowed naturally, as it always did, or nearly so. After a few stinted failures to start, you carried on as if it was any other coffee date. As you were paying your bills, the light caught the silver band still on your finger. You bit your lip, slowly sliding it off, its weight heavy in your palm despite how slim, how small it was.

“Eudora, can I ask one more favor?” you asked hesitantly.

“Of course, Y/N. What are friends for?” she said, offering you a smile.

You held the ring out to her. “Can you give this to Diego for me? And tell him that I’m sorry. And I still love him. No, actually, don’t tell him that. Just...that he should have this back, and I hope that maybe someday, I can be the person he saw who deserved it. Or something like that. I don’t know. It sounds stupid, doesn’t it?” You shook your head, swiping at more tears that were threatening to spill. 

She flashed you a sympathetic half-smile. “I’ll give him your message.” 

Your fingers shook as you passed the ring over to her, a heavy weight of true finality settling over you.