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rustycottoncandy · 2 months ago

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I am alive.

Had I killed myself two years ago, I would not have the life that I have now. I would not have the friends I have now, the characters I'm working on now, nor many of the memories my brain holds now. I wouldn't have met my youngest cat, my boyfriend, or my current friend group. Gee.

Had I killed myself, I never would have started my journey to learning guitar. Many of the things I've crocheted would still just be balls of yarn and my art journey would never have continued to improve.

I got a new painting today. My first painting. And I got it in a very surreal way. My boyfriend, my cousin, and I went for a walk around seven hours ago and, on our way, stumbled upon a painting that seemed very old. We all really liked it and we joked about keeping it since it didn't belong to anyone anymore. People around here leave stuff on the streets when it's too big to put inside a trashcan, for garbage trucks to take them away. I liked the idea of keeping it, so I asked my dad if we could bring it home and he said that we could.

My boyfriend picked the painting up - a painting as wide as I am tall - and the three of us formed a line and walked back home with a big ass painting and the calmest pace you can imagine. And I found it SO FUCKING FUNNY. I was giddy about it. Fuck, we didn't have any paintings at home! We haven't had any until now!! And I was going to be the first person to bring a pretty painting home - which was going to go, guess on whose room? That's right, mine!

We arrived home and, after they left, I spent who-knows-how-long cleaning it. I took a LOT of dust off of that painting. It was fun.

Today was very surreal, precisely because of this. Had I killed myself two years ago, I wouldn't have lived this. It feels weird to think about it. Had I killed myself, I wouldn't be typing this on the chair that I'm sitting on, inside the room that I call my own, on the desk I use to do most of my table-requiring tasks. No. I would just be a rotten corpse. Either that or a pile of ashes.

I want to have children in the future. There's a specific name that I absolutely adore, Alice, which I would love to give my future child if it's a daughter. I've been thinking of writing a sort of diary directed to him, her, or them that I could begin now and hand to them on their 15th birthday, as that's a gesture I would have loved myself. And I will, when I get myself to buy a diary.

It isn't often that I think about my future. It isn't often that I think about whether or not I want to have children, where I think I'll live or would like to live, what my first job might look like, or what life will be like when I grow old. Thinking about it every now and then, though, helps me realize how far away said future is from the present. How many years I've got ahead of me. I've got so, so much to live and so many memories to make. And I'm looking forward to seeing all of them.

My life wasn't over when I was 13. It sucked, but it wasn't over. I wasn't meant to die yet. And it still isn't. Fuck, I'm only 15. I'm only 15 and my life has changed so much already. And it has changed for the better - and it will keep changing. Nothing's ever going to stay the same. I'll feel crappy again someday soon, but things will get better after that like they already have.

Fuck.

I'm glad I didn't kill myself.

Last year, I went to two concerts with my father. One of them was a Mother Mother concert, and the other one was a Mägo de Oz concert. And I loved both experiences SO MUCH!!! Especially the Mother Mother concert! I practically hear their music religiously since that concert! It was really fun and I remember having dinner at a Burger King after it with my dad. I got a T-Shirt, too, and him to agree on it being a good band.

I got my grandma into Mother Mother, too, this very summer! I showed their songs to her and translated their lyrics to Spanish and we spent an entire damn night theorizing about the lyrics of their songs and what each piece meant.

I also got into an abandoned house with a couple of cousins! And an abandoned factory, too :D!

I made a lot of friends this year, too, and still keep friendships that I have had for a very long time! I've now got a real-life friend group that I hang out with every now and then (we're doing a Secret Santa tomorrow, actually!) and a partner who I couldn't possibly appreciate any more than I already do. I'm anything but alone now!!

I wouldn't have lived all this if I had killed myself. Oh, and guess who's two months away from completing an entire year of being clean from self-harm? :3 I promised myself I would buy a bat plushie if I made it through the entire school year without self-harming and I'm looking forward to reblogging this post with that plushie one day.

I'm glad to be alive.

#my stuff

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internetgiraffekid1673 · 5 months ago

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Milo Johnson Through the Ages:

This is post number 6 for The Cross Roads, and the last of our main characters! The Cross Roads is my little pet project of a crossover between Milo and the Phantom Tollbooth, the Wizard of Oz, Peter Pan, and Alice in Wonderland. It focuses on all the main kids from those stories going to the same high school and going on whacky adventures through their various Magical Otherworlds.

More info about the AU, additional notes, and non-formatted drawings under the cut. Here are the posts for Alice, Wendy, John, Michael, and Dorothy.

Chicken Scratch Translation (in the order the boxes should be read):

[The Lands Beyond Era. Age: 10. Source: MS Paint pieces by Alice Lidell & Dorothy Gale]

[Notes: While he was quite apathetic and malcontent at this age, his adventure would open him to the possibilities of the world and permanently change his personality.]

[Lovable Outcast Era. Age: 16. Source: Sophomore year back-to-school selfie]

[Notes: Liked by just about everyone, but he has some quirks that keep people from getting close, like his extreme enthusiasm, occasional depressive episodes, and habit of talking about magic like it's real.]

[Insane Teacher Era. Age: 27. Source: School Staff Photo]

[Notes: He's a kind and competent elementary school teacher who is also so enthusiastic that most students are convinced he's nuts. He's basically a male Valerie Frizzle.]

AU info:

The source materials I am drawing from for this AU are: the book for Milo and the Phantom Tollbooth; the 1939 Warner Bros movie for The Wizard of Oz; both the Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Alice Through the Looking Glass books; mostly the Disney movie for Peter Pan, but with elements of the stageplay and the book as I see fit. This is mostly due to my familiarity with these source materials, but there are a few other canon-welding/writing reasons too.

This is a modern AU taking place sometime between the 90's and the 2010's.

The story will be just about evenly split between slice-of-life high school adventures and a fantastical plot that will take them through all the Magical Otherworlds seen in the original stories.

The school is 7-12. At the time of the main plot, Alice and Michael are 8th graders, Milo and John are sophomores, and Dorothy and Wendy are seniors.

The story takes place in rural Kansas, U.S.A., somewhere around Dodge City (as you may have guessed from Milo's T-shirts). While the original events of Alice in Wonderland and Peter Pan still took place in England, both families moved to the same area in Kansas sometime after the events of canon. Milo, was initially from some random suburban town in a different U.S. state. This decision was made for a number of reasons, first and foremost being that I am not British, I'm American, and writing in America will be much easier for me. Secondly, it had to be Kansas because my characterization of Dorothy has her very attached to her home and farm, and they'd literally never move unless they were forced to. Third, the original events of at the very least Alice in Wonderland had to still take place in England, because. . . well, if you've never read the books, let's just say Alice is very British and Wonderland is her creation, and we'll leave it at that.

There will be ships in this AU: Dorothy x Wendy and John x Milo (what were you expecting something straight? This is tumblr!). Dorothy and Wendy are both sapphic, although they're still figuring out where they are under that umbrella. John is gay and Milo is aspec. Since this is the Milo post, I finally did my deep diving into his character, and decided he is asexual and demiromantic. These identities will be respected in his ship. Alice and Michael will not be actively shipped with anyone, but Alice is pan and Michael is the token straight.

These information files exist in universe! Who assembled them? Great question, hopefully I end out writing the damn thing so ya'll can find out. >:')

Additional Notes:

Thanks so much for sticking with me through this art series. It's not the last of The Cross Roads by any stretch of the imagination, but any art I post for them will now be a bit less organized and a bit more "I had brainrot and doodled the kids."

On the ages: So. I based all their ages and the relative time they had their adventures on the Darling's ages, because they're siblings and are spaced out in canon. I decided that the initial events of Peter Pan took place 5 years before The Cross Roads main plot, when Wendy had recently turned 12 and John and Michael were just shy of 10 and 8 respectively. 5 years later puts them at recently 17 and about to start senior year, recently 15 and about to start sophomore year, and recently 13, about to start 8th grade. I do believe Michael's age is incorrect on his post, since I hadn't done all the proper math quite yet.

Anyway, I slotted the other 3 in between them. Alice actually had her first adventure a little earlier than everyone else to account for the fact that Looking Glass is already Time-Skipped from Wonderland. She went to Wonderland when she was 7 (a solid 6 years before the plot), and went to Looking Glass Land when she was 9 (4 years before the plot). Everybody else had their adventures in the year in between those two. Milo had his adventure while he was 10. Dorothy was 13 when she went to Oz, and is one of the oldest kids in her grade.

Other time events include Milo moving to Kansas about a year after his adventure (4 years before the story), the Darlings moving a year after that (3 years before the story), and Alice moving a year after that (2 years before the story). I do have plans to explore the intermediate stages as their group forms, and how they ended out clocking each other as fellow magical interdimensional travelers.

I made up Milo's last name because he doesn't have one in his original book or movie. That's why it's so boring and unassuming. I didn't want to get too crazy with it.

Dodge City Kansas' mascot is actually the Conquistadors, but this is my universe, and if I say it's the Twisters for comedic reasons, then it's the Twisters. Also, Milo is specifically wearing a shirt bought from their baseball team.

I have also updated all previous posts in the series to have links to all other posts. Let me know if I need to make a masterpost.

Unformatted Drawings:

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adarkrainbow · 1 year ago

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Long ask. Bear with me, please.

I'm still thinking about what counts or not as a fairy tale.

To be honest, I think the only pre-requisites for something to become a fairy tale in pop culture is for it to be a popular fantasy children's story in public domain. And kinda look like a fairy tale, too.

In your opinion, which work would be considered a fairy tale if it weren't for copyright?

Let me give, my examples

C.S. Lewis' Narnia books, especially the first one, The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. If Alice in Wonderland and Wizard of Oz are considered fairy tales, especially in crossovers, Narnia should be too as it shares many themes, plot points, and character archetypes.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. It literally uses all fairy tale archetypes and cliches under the sun, even if it ditches magic for extremely soft sci-fi. Willy Wonka is like Frau Holle or that fairy godmother from Toads and Diamonds, the four brat children are like those siblings and step-siblings who are always magically punished, and even as a child I knew Charlie Bucket was Cinderella but with no focus on romance. He's the youngest sibling that always is magically rewarded.

It is quite funny because I had the idea to make a post about this subject specifically! But since you asked I'll drop some elements of my planned posts here - it can be a good introduction!

Now if you ask me, "fairytale" can't be everything and anything, but that's probably because I come from France where "fairytales" are literaly a literary genre first, and then a category of folktales and legend, and we have specific categorizations different from other countries (again, the merveilleux/fantastique divide for example which determines the French approach to supernatural and fantasy, but is absent from English literature if I am not mistaken).

I... personally do not believe any "popular children story" would be a fairytale. Else that would make the first Harry Potter books a fairytale, or the Winnie the Pooh stories a fairytale or Despicable Me or the recent musical Troll movies fairytales. I think the inherent decision to make something "for children" fairytale like is bad because, again, fairytales were not originally meant for children and thus should not be limited to a child audience.

From my point of view, a fairytale needs to be either a folktale that hold itself in a specific format that makes it separate from legends and myths (the type of local folkloric stories told by old storytellers to children in the countryside for example - but with a clear plot, clear characters, and beginning and ends, separating it from vague legends ; and with a minimum religious element, to separate it from myths for example). I do not like to think of Greek myths as "Greek fairytales". For example, to take an example of the folkloric fairytales of France vs the legends: we have in Bretagne the belief in "les lavandières de nuit", "the night washer-women", ghostly, otherwordly apparitions of women washing clothes at night, and you should never help them else you'll end up dead or with your arms broken. If someone simply tells you what I told you above "It is said there are ghostly women who wash linen at night...", this is more of a "legend", like ghost stories, or "Oh, this is a fairy mound haunted by fairies!" or "It is said a monster lives in this cave". But if you actually tell the story of a specific peasant boy with a specific name, who due to specific reasons ends up meeting these women, and either escapes or falls to their fate, we already are closer to the folktale and thus the "fairytale of Bretagne". But this is all obvious, as these kind of fairytale-folktales were those collected by Grimm and Jacobs and Moe and others...

And then you have literary fairytales, which are stories meant to evoke or imitate the folktales described above, and can derive in many ways (be more "literary") but still identify or present themselves or link themselves to these folktales. These are the Perrault and d'Aulnoy and Andersen fairytales for example. This category can be pushed further with what we call in French "contes détournés" - you could call them "fractured fairytales" to take back a common English term, that is to say all the parodies and rewrites and deformations of fairytales, sometimes for humoristic effects, other times not. Modernization and expansion of fairytales are part of that, so to speak. But we stay in a domain where the story is presented or follows the code and format of fairytales, while also explicitely avoiding, pointing out or reversing the common tropes and rules.

But where the Narnia books and the Dahl books enter, we reach a domain that is not fully fairytale but rather a crossroad between three genres deeply intertwined. "Fairy tales" (or rather "modern fairytales") ; "Fairytale-Fantasy" and "Children fantasy".

Children fantasy is basically any modern children story (by modern I mean deliberately fictional and written as fiction) that involves magic and the supernatural. And these stories can be influenced by fairytales, since it is something children are very aware about, but not always. Peter Pan, just like the Oz books, are "children fantasy" - a form of fantasy for children primarily, or rather a form of children stories that step into the fantasy realm. Pinocchio is one of the oldest "children fantasy", as in a work primarily aimed at children, but with magical and fantastical elements in it.

"Fairytale-fantasy" however is a term usually given to a subgenre of fantasy works that, instead of taking inspiration from epic sagas (epic fantasy) or horror works (dark fantasy) or other things ; takes inspiration from fairytales and folktales. The same way Tolkien was the father of "epic fantasy" he was also the father of "fairytale fantasy" through his Hobbit novel, and also other works (his Tom Bombadil poems, his Farmer Gilles of Ham novel).

The thing is that "children fantasy" and "fairytale fantasy" are deeply interconnected since both can draw source from fairytales and folktales to build entirely new stories. As a result there is a frequent overlap. The Oz books belong as much to "children fantasy" (one of the biggest success in terms of magical series of children-book) as "fairytale fantasy" (they were a pure deconstruction of typical fairytales, explicitely playing with fairytale codes, and later becoming an "American fairytale" classic). The Narnia books are also part of this crossroad, as they are "children fantasy" (they are a traditional fantasy story with epic tones, but for children and teenagers), while also being "fairytale fantasy" (taking inspiration and paying homage to several fairytales and folktales). They all belong to this category of works which are not fairytales per se (since they are not of folkloric origins, nor were they meant to be faithful rewrites or perfect pastiches of traditional folkloric fairytales), but definitively works of fiction based upon fairytales, inspired by fairytales, and mant to take fairytales into the "next step" of the world of fiction.

The main difference between "children fantasy" and "fairytale fantasy" would be as such. Children fantasy, while sometimes inspired by fairytales, is not always tied to fairytales and can be completely fairytale free. For example many of Roald Dahl stories do pay homage to fairytales and are inspired by his fairytales (his witches in The Witches, his giants in THE BFG, Wonka and his factory, the Giant Peach, etc...), he is part of the "writers of modern fairytales". But you have also lot of children stories with magic that do not involve any fairytale reference. Children fantasy can be inspired and allied by fairytales, but is not defined by them.

On the opposite side, "fairytale fantasy" is defined by fairytales - but not by age. Yes some of the most famous "fairytale fantasy" works are for children: the Oz books or the Narnia books. But just as many are for adults and definitively not for children. Neil Gaiman wrote a Coraline for children, but his Stardust is definitively for adults. The movie "Legend", while one of the most iconic fairytale-fantasies, is for adults.

So, I think the real way to point out what a fairytale is, is to look at the format and intentions of the author and of the work, to see if it fits the literary fairytales of old. There needs to be a conscious emulation, pastiche or imitation of traditional fairytales, there needs to be something that make it feel like a fairytale, and not like a story inspired by fairytales. But honestly... this is deep down really, really hard to draw a line as it mostly comes to personal definitions and appreciations. The genre of fairytales is vast and blurry, as it covers traditional European folktales and a specific short literary genre first, but was then expanded to cover other literary works and non-European folktales - and so the lines are... muddled.

I do not hesitate to say that "Over the Garden Wall" is actually a modern fairytale, as seeing the show made me literaly feel again the same kind of feeling I had when I first discovered fairytales. But I can understand why people would consider it "fairytale fantasy" rather than a "modern fairytale" because it was made with the intent of it being a children show and fantasy show first and foremost. Dahl stories are definitively "modern fairytales" - but the fact they are set in "modern day" and a grounded reality where the supernatural is not supposed to exist can disqualify them from being traditional fairytales ; or the humor and parody and play with the fairytale codes can also create a distanciating humor that make them fairytale subversions or pastiches or parodies rather than fairytales. Pinocchio has everything that fits a literary fairytale - but its format also evokes old "story-cycles" like the Reynard adventures or Gargantua ones, and its lack of simplicity and uniformity, or rather its long, flowing nature can also disqualify it from being a fairytale and rather make it a fairytale-inspired fantasy....

Honestly the narrowest definition you can have of "fairytale" is: printed works that explicitely designate themselves as such, from collected folktales (Grimm) to literary fiction written to emulate and imitate them (Andersen). This is the most narrow definition you can have. But then, one can expand to include all folktales that inspired fairytales ; or on the other side, one can push into the literary direction, to include stories that do not have the fairytale format, but that were so heavily inspired and shaped after fairytales, and gained such a popular influence and widespread presence, that they became "modern fairytales". But then this also opens the door to questions such as "What is a myth?" or "What about literary myths?" (like Faust or Don Juan or Frankenstein, all those famous "literary myths" as we call them in French).

As you can see by this convoluted answer, it is not a clear-cut question and nobody can truly answer it. Everybody will have a different opinion, and there is no real limit. The question mostly defines in how the work label itself. Perrault and Grimm and Andersen works called themselves fairytales, so there is no doubt about it. But take Neil Gaiman's Stardust - an iconic of fairytale fantasy, and yet Gaiman refers to it as a "romance in Faerie", evoking more the genre of fantastical and supernatural romances (medieval-meaning of the sense) like "The Well at World's End" and others - and the work is also very inspired by fantasy fae stories with a vague proto-urban fantasy feel to it, like "Lug-in-Mist". Same thing with the movie "Legend" which is definitively inspired by fairytales and a fairytale-fantasy, but was sold as a "fantasy movie" or even "heroic fantasy" movie first and foremost. Meanwhile the Oz books were intended by Baum to be a "modern, American fairytale" - even though their novel format and their franchise nature removes the idea they can become as "traditional" as the folktales he meant to imitate...

I'll stop there for now, but long story short: It's complicated, and when in doubt, don't hesitate to refer to intermediary terms like "children fantasy" or "fairytale fantasy", which clearly evoke modern fictional works and can highlight a difference with classic literary fairytales or folkloric fairytales, without rejecting the idea these "modern fairytales" aren't fairytales in their own right.

#question #fairytales #what is a fairytale #fairytale fantasy #children fantasy #literary fairytale #folkloric fairytale #i honestly don't know what i am writing

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ljsmiths-thenightworld · 2 months ago

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FORBIDDEN TALES

An Interview with novelist L.J. Smith, found using the Wayback Machine. Originally posted on nightworld.net (🛑 which is definitely no longer a fan site)

L.J. Smith is the author of nine bestselling novels for children and teenagers, including the two series The Vampire Diaries and The Secret Circle. The first volume of her latest series The Forbidden Game, is in bookstores now.

Q: Why did you decide to write novels for young adults?

A: I decided to write for kids when I was a kid. I knew the kind of books I liked to read and there just weren't enough of them. Nothing to do but write them myself. I'd been telling myself stories ever since I was four or five, and writing them down was just the next step. I suppose the real question is: Why am I still writing YA books, since I haven't been a young adult for...ahem!...well, quite a few years.

Could be arrested development. I must admit that I still read classic children's books, and get a lot of pleasure out of it. Books about fantasy, magic, and the supernatural just excite me, and I love to read them and write them. I'd like to write books for adults someday, but I hope I never grow up completely!

Q: How did you get your first book published?

A: I finished The Night of the Solstice the year I got out of college. I'd been working on the book since I got the idea for it in high school, but the writing went slowly because I was busy studying psychology. Besides, everybody told me that I could never make a living being a writer, so there was no hurry!

I took my book to a professional typist (I didn't even have a typewriter in those days, much less a computer) and she got very excited about it. She said it was the best manuscript she'd seen, and she had a friend who was a literary agent, and asked if I was I interested in being agented.

I was. Very. Of course, it still took some time to get the book sold -- for one thing, I had to cut it by a hundred pages! But eventually Macmillan bought it, and my fate was decided. I loved writing and I knew I had to keep doing it.

Q: What is your educational and professional background?

A: I got my BA in Experimental Psychology from the University of California at Santa Barbara (great school! great beaches!) I have two teaching credentials from San Francisco State University, one in elementary education and one in Special Ed. I've taught kindergarten and special education, and enjoyed both -- but now I'm writing full time. Every fall I get very nostalgic about teaching, but writing is more fun -- and it pays better.

Q: Who are some of your favorite writers?

A: This is a tough one. There are so many, but I really tend to like the classics. I adore Dickens' characters and his playful, whimsical prose. I love Jane Austen's gentle satire, and Mark Twain's dry wit. I read Steinbeck, Alice Walker and Toni Morrison when I want to cry. For sheer escapism I like fantasy or science fiction -- Tolkien and C.S. Lewis and H.G. Wells. Or detective stories, like Dorothy Sayers' Lord Peter Whimsey series. And -- please don't laugh -- when I'm sad, I cuddle up in front of the fire with L. Frank Baum's Oz books or Laura Ingalls Wilder's Little House on the Prairie books. They always make me feel better.

Q: What advice would you give a teenager who wants to be an author?

A: WRITE! Write, write, write. And read, read, read. Those are the two most important things you can do.

Write all the time -- write in a journal, scribble down ideas on napkins at McDonald's, spend a boring class scrawling poetry in your notebook (Okay, maybe that last isn't the best advice, but I admit it worked for me.) Write anything and everything you like, and don't be critical of yourself. Just let it come out and worry about whether it's good later.

Write when you're feeling something; when you're mad, or in love, or in pain. The passion will come through. And write about what you know, write about your own school, your friends, your take on the world. Teens often think their own lives are boring -- they want to write about exotic places, weird people, things out of their experience. But it's best, especially at first, to write what you know. It may be hard to expose your most private self to other people, but that's what writing is about. And the ring of truth is unmistakable.

Reading is the other important thing. Read all you can and read a variety of books. You'll absorb all sorts of good things, grammar, vocabulary, plot structure -- even if you don't realize it. Try the classics, and keep trying them as you get older. Some things that you think are really boring and stupid right now will suddenly become interesting as you mature. A little light goes on in your head and you say, "Oh, so that's why everybody likes Chaucer, wow."

Q: Is there anything else you think will interest teenage writers?

A: I've babbled on long enough. But I think it's great that Writes of Passage is giving kids a forum for their work. This kind of encouragement is just what teenagers need. Good luck!

#lj smith backlog #lj smith #backlog #interview #lj smith interview

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kitxkatrp · 1 year ago

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Cry, sender wipes tears off receiver's face with their thumbs. (Alice)

She couldn't seem to stop crying. It was like her whole world had shattered down around her.

"T-Tell him to give Oz back...tell Vincent to give Oz back..."

She needed her Oz. She couldn't have him ripping up Oz. It didn't matter what she had said to him, he had crossed a line.

#{ Alice Baskerville: Glutton of Meat Canon-ish Verse }

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ecargmura · 6 months ago

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Pandora Hearts Volume 6 Review

Reading through this chapter got me happy because both my favorite character and my second favorite character make their debut! Yes, my faves are Leo and Elliot! I think this is where the story starts picking up, not because of my bias, but because Oz finally gets the character development albeit slow.

Chapter 23 is basically where the last chapter of the fifth volume left off. To summarize, it’s basically Break’s death flags waving at him. Also, it’s nice to see Reim and Break’s friendship and what Sharon means to Break. Oz was a little sh*t to Break, being surprised that he got friends. Haha, continue being one, Oz. So, yes, Sharon is now saved.

Chapters 24, 25 and 26 all revolve around the Lutwidge Academy. I love how Chapter 23 was all Break and his death flags and suddenly, Chapter 24 is just Oscar going “LET’S GO VISIT ADA! HERE, WEAR THESE DISGUISES AND TAKE THIS UNDERGROUND PASSAGE WITHOUT THINKING TOO MUCH ABOUT THE CONSEQUENCES!” And then they suffer the consequences hilariously as Oscar also wears a school uniform but does a terrible job of not being conspicuous.

These three chapters are also important for Oz’s character development in a sense. He already had a a bit of a self-sacrificing, “I don’t care about myself” sort of personality and it got worse once Jack took over his body, developing an even greater inferiority complex and even an identity crisis. That was why he avoided Ada, despite wanting to see her again, because he believes that she doesn’t remember him all too well and that he still looks the same while she got older. Fortunately, Alice was one of the factors that allowed him to realize his worth. He once told Alice that she’s fine the way she is, and Alice repeats that to him.

I think the biggest factor that allowed Oz to stop thinking that he’s worthless is his encounter with Elliot and Leo. Before, he wanted to meet them because they were playing a four-handed piece that sounded just like the music box melody. Then, Oz and Elliot meet with terrible first impressions as Elliot did the unthinkable: spoil Holy Knight, Oz’s favorite book series with the reveal that his favorite character Edgar dies. Elliot hates people like Edgar who are self-sacrificing and care little about the people around them as he believes people like him are selfish. That’s Elliot’s impression of Oz before he finally got through to him and helped Oz realize that he has worth and that people love him for who he is and not because he’s Jack.

Elliot and Leo have so much chemistry. They’re always seen together, yet they bounce off of each other so well. Elliot is hot-blooded and isn’t afraid of speaking his mind while Leo is like his handler of sorts, but also scolds Elliot whenever he gets too out of hand. I love their little bickering relationship. While they squabble with each other a lot, Elliot and Leo do care a lot about each other. While Leo is the one who puts Elliot in his place, Elliot is also protective of Leo as he’s seen protecting him from fatal attacks twice. Though, Leo’s status as a competent servant is questionable. Basically, these two are beta Vanitas and Noe.

This is also where the Baskervilles are finally introduced. The members of Baskerville are interesting. Lottie is a baddie. Doug and Fang are interesting too. However, I can see why Lottie is on the cover for this volume. She stood out the most with her eccentric behavior, to her chain and to her being one of the factors of the glaring flaw in Oz’s personality.

I also remember that this is where the anime starts to diverge from the manga. I remember some scenes in the manga were changed in the anime, though my memory is very vague. I think once I get to around Volumes 7-8, I’ll rewatch the anime. Other than that, I think I did a good job not gushing too much over Leo for this review. I’m not sure when I’ll get to Volume 7 since I’m going to move to a new house with my family, meaning I’m going to have to stop buying manga for a while. Let me know your thoughts about this volume!

#pandora hearts #jun mochizuki #manga #manga review #review #oz vessalius #elliot nightray #leo #lottie #doug #fang #ada vessalius #ecargmura #arum journal

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sunnydaleherald · 9 months ago

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The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Wednesday, June 5

WILLOW: I mean, he said he was gonna wait until I was ready, but I'm ready. Honest. I'm good to go here. BUFFY: Well, I think it's nice that he's not just being an animal. WILLOW: It is nice. He's great. We have a lot of fun. But I want smoochies! BUFFY: Have you dropped any hints? WILLOW: I've dropped anvils. BUFFY: Ah, he'll come around. What guy could resist your wily Willow charms? WILLOW: At last count, all of them. Maybe more. BUFFY: Well, none of them know a thing. They all get an 'F' in Willow. WILLOW: But I want Oz to get an 'A', and, oh, one of those gold stars.

~~BtVS 2x15 “Phases”~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Everything's New (Buffy, PG) by badly_knitted

Poison Blossom (Cordelia/Lilah, M) by MadeInGold

You’re an Angel (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by Lilacsandorangeblossoms

What could have been What is (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by Lilacsandorangeblossoms

Feed me or feel me (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Desicat

[Chaptered Fiction]

[Ukrainian language] Forward to Time Past//Вперед у час минулий, Chapter 45/67 (Buffy/Spike, E) translation by Uraniya

Hero, Chapter 2/3 (Buffy/Willow, M) by Xyex

Infinitely, Chapter 55/? (Willow/Tara, M) by Laragh

In the Company of Witches and Slayers:, Chapter 57/200 (Willow/Tara, E) by VladimirHarkonnen (TheLightdancer)

[French language] Recommencer, Chapter 15 (Buffy/Faith, M) by Friday Queen

Reunion, Chapter 3 (Willow/Tara, Buffy/Spike, T) by riah alice drake

[French language] Do as Romans do, Chapter 31 (Dawn/Spike, T) by OldGirl-NoraArlani

Spike Has A Girlfriend, Chapter 8 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Spikelover4ever

Morning Stretches, Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by CheekyKitten

Early One Morning, Chapter 54 COMPLETE! (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by all choseny

Deliverance From Destiny, Chapter 24 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Ragini

Stomping on butterflies, Chapters 2-3 (Buffy/Spike, 18+) by Blackoberst

Early One Morning, Chapter 54 COMPLETE! (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by all choseny

[Images, Audio & Video]

Artwork: Well, who do we have here? (Buffy/Spike, worksafe) by lialivingart

Artwork: leanin’ in (Spike, worksafe) by yarboyandy

Crafts: my handmade kiss the librarian mug! (worksafe) by melaniemoth13

[Reviews & Recaps]

ReWatch: Angel - S3, E7 - 8 by kimannebb

PODCAST: HELLMOUTH HOMOS: The Yoko Factor/Primeval by Fear Queers

PODCAST: Episode 59: Fear, Itself (W/ Samantha Marr) by Gym Was Cancelled

PODCAST: Is That My TA or a Bush? (S4E8) by It Stakes Two

[Fandom Discussions]

[About AtS writers making Angel decide to turn back the day he was human] by nicnacsnonsense

Gunn’s whole trajectory with always piss me off by initiumseries

as excited as I am to see Wesley, it is weird that this show got rid of Doyle by nicnacsnonsense

I feel like the scooby gang never took accountability for how Faith turned out by there-are-many-ways-to-smile

It’s really interesting to me that Buffy tells Faith the girls are all potential slayers “just like we were” because she and Faith never knew they were potentials by reality-schmality

It’s actually a little f* up, that they just assume Faith with take over for Buffy so she can live a normal life by there-are-many-ways-to-smile

I never noticed before but it’s weird that Willow thinks she’s being the bigger person by letting Cordelia be upset with her and Xander like she wasn’t apart of the affair by there-are-many-ways-to-smile

What If: Jonathan died in Earshot by nightshade, multiple posters

Okay, what is everyone’s absolute least favorite episode? by queenrosybee

Did Harmony ever have a soul? by Kilomech

Theory: The First manipulated Willow into resurrecting Buffy by LiviaDruzilla

What's your favorite metaphor or symbolism from Restless and why? by jonaskoelker

I think there are only 6 times in the whole series where we see Buffy not wearing earrings, only 4 of which are SMG and all in the first season by diehardnick

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

PUBLICATION: Top 18 best Vampire TV shows of all time ranked by fans [BtVS #1 - AtS #6] by Coveredgeekly

Submit a link to be included in the newsletter!

Join the editor team :)

#btvs #buffy the vampire slayer #ats #angel the series #fan art #fan fiction #meta

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zannolin · 2 years ago

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4 7 AND 17!!!! -kai

HI KAI my beloved thank youuuu <3

4. Do you prefer writing multi-chapter or oneshot fanfictions?

oneshots full stop. okay well rolling stop. i love multi-chapters in theory but my god i hate the execution they take SO long to write and i have to keep so much straight and i have to pick CHAPTER TITLES and have you noticed how people are the worst about commenting on multichaps? if you post a oneshot people seem to be more likely to leave you a lovely comment with all their thoughts. post a multichapter and people won't comment 'til it's over or just leave a one-line comment like "can't wait til there's more!!" and it's like why did i even put in all this work if it was miserable to write and there's no joy in posting HUH. but also i do love when i have like one person i know is reading it and i have a reveal happening at some point or a crazy cliffhanger and i get to see their reaction to it. moth's reactions to the fey au were very fun back in the day. so yeah i'm a oneshot girlie but i keep writing ill-advised multi-chapters and telling myself "this time it will be different" (it is not different the best it gets is subreddits calling your fic "super underrated" which is not actually the compliment people think it is).

7. What’s a trope you love to write?

love to write a good college fic. found family, of course, is a big one. and hurt/comfort is my beloved.

17. Are there any writers and/or stories that you consider an influence?

writers (fic): @/rebelpeas, @/eirianerisdar, meri, laquearia, @/rarilight, @/blusandbirds, aknightley, YouAreInAComaWakeUp writers (other): maggie stiefvater, tamsyn muir, t kira madden, carmen maria machado, my sister, ann patchett, kristen arnett, edgar allen poe, lemony snicket, tolkien (obligatory), shel silverstein, probably wayne thomas batson unfortunately

stories (not book specific): the scorpio races, the secret life of bees, the twistrose key, the polar express (2004), fnaf, the oz books, home alone 2: lost in new york (1992), parallelograms by agrestenoir, pins and needles by mutterandmumble, national treasure (2004), the truman show (1998), the half of it (2020), frances ha (2012), the goose girl by shannon hale, the starcatchers series, the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe, the haunting of hill house (2018), mabel podcast, welcome to night vale podcast, alice isn't dead podcast, the odd life of timothy green (2012), moulin rouge! (2001), the spiderwick chronicles, over the garden wall (2014), the x-files, object 3921.0045.371, catalog entry by wrishwrosh, this one (well, one and a half) christmas musical production the church where i live put on (that i was in fun fact) that involved two characters reuniting after like 30 years that left an unbelievable impact on my 12 y/o brain, mlp:fim, and star trek....to name a few.

i feel like that explains both everything and nothing about my writing.

ask game!!

#answered asks #faebriel

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seewetter · 5 months ago

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Hm. This is both a good target of critique and a almost mythologizing criticism: Mary Shelley is not the "true inventor" of science fiction, even if the late Brian Aldiss argued for this idea. She is one of many voices that precede H.G. Wells and precede Jules Verne. In fact there's nothing wrong with praising Jules Verne for writing some superb and trailblazing sci-fi novels that are still remembered today or for praising H.G. Wells for writing a story so vivid that its radio play was believed to be a real news broadcast and caused a mass panic.

Like isn't Margaret Cavendish's The Blazing World from 1666(!), with its strong focus on the scientific exploration of another planet, science fiction -- hard science fiction, even? Isn't Taketori Monogatari (The Tale of the Bamboo Cutter) from the 9th or 10th century, written by an unknown author, with a child that falls from the Moon and is raised by the local community, similar enough to First Contact stories (like E.T.) to qualify (by some definitions) as sci-fi, despite the fae and magical elements (which we also find in Star Wars)? A True Story, written in what is today Syria by an atheist author includes groups of adventurers travelling to the moon and planets of our solar system, getting involved in alien politics of those celestial bodies... nothing to do with sci-fi?

Aren't medieval stories of the Brazen Head or ancient stories about the wild inventions of Archimedes (setting up hundreds of mirrors to protect a city from naval attack by burning them) technically science fiction? Isn't Alexandrian Romance, as a genre in Ancient Rome, totally sci-fi? With Alexander the Great exploring the skies in a hot air balloon (at the time didn't exist) and beneath the sea in a submarine (ditto).

I think it's interesting that the modern publishing industry keeps getting away with convincing us that one literary classic or another is the origin of the entire genre.

Like this goes for fantasy as well. J.R.R. Tolkien is the father* of fantasy*** -- and those asterisks are just a stylistic device I'm using to indicate that there's more going on. Tolkien did popularize fantasy, did cause a huge wave of ripoffs by mainstream publishing houses. His main contribution to fantasy isn't inventing it, though -- rather its being so comprehensive in amalgamating existing tropes within an existing niche genre and so good at expressing these tropes and making them all appealing that suddenly less skilled authors know how to appeal to much of the same wide audience that he appealed to.

Tolkien didn't invent giant spiders, not even in prose fiction -- Jeremias Gotthelf beat him to it by ~100 years -- and there are probably stories about giant spiders that go way back, not just in folklore and oral tradition, but also in fiction

He didn't invent adventure stories with goblins living under mountains, he was directly inspired by existing literature

Tolkien didn't invent adventure stories set in fantastical lands - not even with in published Western prose literature - his works were compared to Alice in Wonderland and there's lots of works of fiction that inspired Tolkien that can be seen in the same genre (Gulliver's Travels, Peter Pan, Wizard of Oz, the list goes on)

I need to stop myself from getting carried away (the back of my mind is like "and Sauron is based on that werewolf villain in what is clearly also a fantasy book that Tolkien read") -- the point is hopefully clear by now.

No genre exists in a vacuum. When Mame-Fatou Niang (the author of the screenshotted tweet) says that Mary Shelley "wrote what is still considered today the 1st science fiction novel" but follows up telling New York Times Books that they are continuing a tradition of erasing her, I find that to be kind of silly. Because there is clearly a tradition of not considering her the mother of sci-fi -- put differently, we could just as easily say that Jules Verne "wrote what is still considered today the 1st science fiction novel" and that there is a tradition of that. We could also say that Margaret Cavendish "wrote what is still considered today the 1st science fiction novel" and that there is a tradition of that, which would equally be true, because ever since Virginia Woolfe rediscovered Cavendish's work there definitely has been a tradition considering her the mother of sci-fi and fantasy.

The reality is that these genres are ancient and diverse. That they stretch back to when people first started fantasizing about inventing things (which must have been in the Paleolithic) or about things that weren't real (I believe this 40,000 year old statue to be an example of something that wasn't real then and isn't real now). We could view Plato's Republic as containing elements of fantasy when Plato wrote about Atlantis -- sure, it was a thought experiment, but he was writing about a non-real society in the knowledge that it wasn't real -- because even if there had been a real Atlantis and Plato knew about it, which I doubt, the story of Atlantis as told by Plato is meant to illustrate his philosophical ideas about all kinds of topics and the "real" Atlantis (if it ever existed) did not exist just for Plato to be able to do that. So its related to fantasy, its purpose is to make the reader consciously fantasize about something.

When we treat these genres as if they were invented by Mary Shelley, H.G. Wells and Tolkien, we do ourselves a disservice. We ignore all that is there, the wealth of human ideas and experiences. Even much of the folkloric traditions of the world is written with a certain tongue-in-cheekness that makes it clear the reader is meant to enjoy a fantastical story and not really assume it all to be real. Anansi or Ysbaddaden don't have to be real for people to get a kick out of their tales.

Mary Shelley didn't invent sci-fi. But she sure as heck contributed to it.

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withloveilya · 4 months ago

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books i read in october

So I started my internship in October and I was worried that I might not be able to read as much. However, I managed to squeeze in some time to read during my lunch break, after work, and during the weekends. I managed to read five books and they’re mostly short novels because they’re easier to read when I am swamped with work.

1. To Paradise by Hanya Yanagihara

I love Hanya Yanagihara’s writing style and I am currently in the process of reading all of her works. I got this book a while ago but was too intimidated by the size to start reading. Once I do start reading the book, it took me two weeks to get through this it because while I enjoy the writing, it is excruciatingly slow and I just didn’t feel excited to continue reading. I persevered and I ended up quite liking it.

There’s three stories in this book and each story is set in a different time period: 1893, 1993 and 2093. Although the character names are similar in all of the stories, they are not related to each other at all. Each story has different genres, but the message is similar which is love. I know love is such a vague and general message but it is more complex than that. Out of all the stories, my favourite is the last one because I grew attached to Charlie.

2. Our Tethered Skates by Naadhira Zahari

I finished this book in 30 minutes or so because it is very short. It only has 100 pages and the writing is fairly easy to digest as it more suitable for kids and young adults. The premise is similar to The Wonderful Wizard of Oz and Alice in Wonderland because the protagonist is transported to a magical kingdom called Verglas and she is declared the warrior Verglas had been waiting for.

There’s a lot of missing plot points because of the length of the book but I enjoyed it nonetheless. The shortness of the book also made it hard for me to formulate my thoughts about it. I think this is definitely a book that younger me would have appreciated more.

3. Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson

I am in the quest to read all of the books that have been adapted into my favourite films and Bridge to Terabithia is the first on the list because I remember the pain I felt watching it as a child a little too well. I was curious to see whether the book is better than the film and I have come to the conclusion that I love both of them equally. I love the film as it is a part of my childhood. I love the book especially because reading from Jesse’s perspective made me understand more how he navigates his loss and grief.

I have always loved reading children’s books that deal with heavy topics, and while I have never experienced the loss of a dear friend, Jesse’s narration of the tragedy made it easy for me to understand the depth of the pain he felt. His disbelief, denial, anger and eventual acceptance is what made the book authentic.

4. Minor Detail by Adania Shibli

Yet another short book but it left such a profound impact on me. The book is a fictionalised account of a real life tragedy in which a Palestinian Bedouin woman was captured, raped and murdered by Israeli soldiers in 1949. After reading this books, I was left astounded and grew obsessed with this minor detail so I looked up the article about this crime on Haaretz. “I saw fit to remove her from the world” is what the platoon commander wrote in his report about this incident and I am just angry by the way he decide on things as though he is God.

The book has two different parts and they’re told by different narrator from different times. The first part is told from an Israeli platoon commander’s perspective during the 1949 tragedy. I find it fascinating the way the author writes from his perspective because he narrates his daily routine and the atrocities he and his squad committed in such a detached and indifferent manner. The second part is set in present day Ramallah. The narrator is haunted by the report on the crimes and ventured on a long and dangerous journey, driving past checkpoints to the place where the atrocity was committed. This part is fascinating to me because of the way the narrator describes life under occupation. She tells of the checkpoints and the regular bombing as if they’re minor details in her daily routine. For Palestinians, that is their reality.

This book was definitely hard to read but it was important for me to read it so that this minor detail is acknowledged and remembered. So that the minor details Palestinians have to live through is understood.

5. Mornings in Jenin by Susan Abulhawa

This was certainly one of the most heartbreaking books I have read. I felt all kinds of emotions while reading but the most prominent are hatred and sorrow. Yes, I have been passionate about the situation in Palestine but I had little to no knowledge about the Nakba and the subsequent conflicts afterwards. This book didn’t just educate me. It also made me understand what it is like to be a Palestinian. I’m not saying I understand completely what it is like to be in their circumstances, but reading from these characters’ perspectives has made me realise their reality.

The story revolves around the Abulheja family and what their life had been in the village of Ein Hod, how their lives changed when they were banished by Israel and had to live at a refugee camp in Jenin, and the subsequent conflicts that alter the Abulhejas’ lives. It was a difficult read, as I expected, but I enjoyed reading it nonetheless.

#book #books #bookblr #reading #bookworm #read #what i read #book reccs #book recommendations #book review #wrap up #book blog

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booksandchainmail · 2 years ago

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Pale 2.9

So excited to see the Forest Ribbon Trail.

oh gods i love this opossum. do the animal companions always talk, or that a opossum-specific trait

It was a kid, no older than eight, possibly younger, with messy blond hair, a jacket, a top, and bare feet.

oh no. Do boon companions always appear as humans, you'd think someone would note that on the instructions! Is that part of why you're supposed to ask not remember?

she wore an adult-sized t-shirt that came to her knees, black. It was printed with ‘I have class, I have sass, I scream at own ass’.

I love this opossum

“In the practitioner and Other sense, not the ordinary sense. You’ve never bled or tasted blood?” “I have. Both,” the girl said.

welp. don't think we have any details on what that means

“What story is this? All things Other have some roots in the annals of man,” the baby opossum said. “Fairy tales, fantasy stories, myths, religions, and urban religions. There are no original stories. So I ask you… what kind of story is this? Don’t jump to the obvious answer. Give me a good answer and I’ll tell you something you should know.”

Hmm. My first thought is Little Red Riding Hood (traveling through forest with a wolf at the end). But also, in more general terms, classic fairy tale story: you go on a journey, have an animal companion to aid you, pick up strange tools that will help you later, and face down a monster at the end. I'm also reminded of the Babylon sequence from Diana Wynne Jones's book Deep Secret, but I don't think that's what they're going for.

It's also really hard to tell how much of what's going on is normal for the Forest Ribbon Trail, and how much is about the animal blood fuckup (I checked the instructions and there were no notes about what happens in that case). I do not trust the roadside opossum though.

I thought it would be more cut and dry but it’s only constant confusion, a strange place with strange people.

well now I am thinking Alice in Wonderland

“Curiouser and curiouser,” Avery said. “That’s it, right?” “A bit of Wizard of Oz, with the yellow brick road, or the Path. A lot of Alice in Wonderland,” Avery said.

hey!

There was a giant doll head, the girl who carried the other opossum, the normal man, and the whispering cat.

Cat... cheshire cat? or maybe cowardly lion? who else is in Alice in Wonderland: Mad Hatter, March Hare, Dormouse, Caterpillar, Queen? Or is the thing that isn't supposed to be here whatever's causing the thumping?

This is the second reality you have to face, as part of your journey along this trail. The world is bleak, terrible things happen, and you cannot fix it, whether you are a thirteen year old girl or a master practitioner in her seventies.

hmmm. People keep talking as if the coin is the object that lets you bring some of the Lost back, but the instructions in the Extra Materials say that's the skull. Not sure if this is authorial error, or if Avery is misremembering and the Others are cuing off of her.

She was supposed to come to terms with something about herself, like Alice and growing up, or Dorothy and the idea of home. Every single trap so far had been marked by indecision. Hesitation. Even her boon companion evoked it.

yeah! character development

A glamour, to bring out her best self. But to capture it, she needed to chase it first. Mark it like warpaint, worn after the battle. After she was sweaty from a game well played. After she was brave. After she was noble. It stressed that she had to decide who and what she wanted to be, then solidify it.

brave and noble...

“Nicolette Belanger?” Avery asked.

oh shit

“The gimmick. The opossum. It plays dead even when it doesn’t mean to, fainting. Deceives when it doesn’t mean to. It says the opposite of what it means to, but it can deceive well enough to bring a token item into the Wolf’s negotiation.”

oh... so when she said she didn't like the name Avery gave her...

#booksandchainmail reads pale #pale #wildbow #this one got long

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chl0writes · 3 years ago

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The Sarah Characters’ Music Taste.

Apparently I’m addicted to writing headcanons.

GIF’s are NOT mine.

—

Billie Dean Howard.

Billie Dean is definitely not a fan of modern music.

I’ve said it before and I will say it again, if Billie Dean lived in England, she would be an avid smooth radio listener.

Older music reminds Billie Dean of her younger days. Back when she was carefree and nobody knew her name.

Billie finds jazz incredibly soothing, artists like Peggy Lee, Louis Armstrong and Billie Holiday.

There are vintage record players in almost every room of the house the pair of you share. You would always bring Billie vinyls home if you see one you think she might like when you’re solo shopping.

Slow dancing to vintage music late at night is what you and Billie love to do most.

Your own music taste is incredibly versatile. You like all genres from house music, to jazz music. You definitely earn a few eye-rolls from Billie when a club song comes on shuffle.

Lana Winters.

In regards to her music taste, Lana is still very much stuck in the 60’s.

Lesley Gore, The Beatles and Aretha Franklin are some of her favourites.

She does however, like Hozier. She likes the messages behind his music. Take Me To Church is one of her favourite songs, ever.

She does quite like Lana Del Rey and you often tease her about how alike they look. Lana doesn’t see it. Okay, maybe she does a little bit.

Like Billie, Lana too owns a vintage record player.

Cordelia Goode.

Having lived in New Orleans her entire life, it’s no surprise that Cordelia adores jazz.

Your Supreme loves Motown music. She loves to have it playing while she’s in her office working.

Anything Marvin Gaye and anything Stevie Wonder.

Delia didn’t ever really like Fleetwood Mac. However, between Misty’s constant playing of the band and your adoration for them, she has grown to be quite the fan. Seven Wonders is her favourite, obviously.

I Put A Spell On You by the Hocus Pocus cast.

Bette & Dot Tattler.

Criminal by Fiona Apple.

They have such different music tastes.

Bette prefers artists like Peggy Lee and Ella Fitzgerald. Dot is slightly more modern in her music taste.

Bette absolutely loves Disney songs. Dot thinks it’s childish but you have caught her humming a cinderella song on several occasions.

Sally McKenna.

Sally is definitely a rock chick, which comes as absolutely no surprise.

Nirvana, Fleetwood Mac, Meatloaf- if it’s rock she is all over it.

You introduced her to the Arctic Monkeys which is one of your favourite bands. You always say the song Arabella was written about her. She cries.

Sally adores Amy Winehouse.

Tear You Apart by She Wants Revenge.

Sally definitely has numerous band t-shirts that she sleeps in. You love buying her new ones.

Audrey Tindall.

Yellow by Coldplay is Audrey’s song. There is absolutely no room for arguing about it.

Audrey is a huge fan of the British Anthems like Sweet Caroline and Come on Eileen.

Alice, Alice, who the fuck is Alice?

Taylor Swift STAN.

Definitely has that playlist saved on Spotify, ‘songs that get British people turnt’ and honestly, you get it.

Is a huge fan of oldskool R&B like Mary J Blige etc. It reminds her of her teenage years when she used to go clubbing.

She cannot cope with sad songs. It has to have a good beat, otherwise she will not enjoy it. Besides Yellow, Yellow is life.

Ally Mayfair Richards.

Honestly, doesn’t even listen to music that much. Which is so weird to you.

Knows a LOT of kids songs, like Disney and stuff because of Oz.

You once heard her singing Nicki Minaj when she thought she was alone, which was highly entertaining to you.

Wilhemina Venable.

Wilhemina has always been a fan of music. It helps block out her thoughts.

She would be absolutely mortified if anybody (especially you) found out that she liked Taylor Swift. Like, a lot.

Classical music helps her to relax when she is working. You love to tease her for this.

Wilhemina plays piano too, and it’s your favourite thing in the world. You always make her play for you and she loves to learn your favourite songs.

50 Shades of Grey soundtrack.

Everybody Wants to Rule the World is one of her favourites.

Still uses CDs.

Secret Metalhead.

Her playlists on Spotify have definitely all got purple aesthetic pictures.

#american horror story #sarah paulson #sarah paulson x reader #ally mayfair richards #billie dean howard #audrey tindall #lana winters #ahs asylum #ally mayfair x reader #ahs cult #wilhemina venable x reader #billie dean x reader #headcanon

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fivekrystalpetals · 1 year ago

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#it literally never occurred to me before that she's not even included in the “happy ending” au. like. genuinely what the fuck though TT_TT#she can't even be happily alive in a different universe??????

oh i so agree that if VIncent could have a redemption after all the shit he pulled in the series, Noise could totally have had one too. imho "Redemption by death" (if it was what Rt. 97 meant for Noise) doesn't work for Noise, bc to my eyes she hasn't really done anything that criminal/messed-up/ irredeemable as was projected upon her by the narrative, compared to the other more problematic characters.

btw I didn't include this scene in the main post but...

This was Break's retaliation at Sharon's abduction--brutally stabbing Noise twice out of nowhere. And, this was before he even knew the Baskervilles were immortal/healed fast.

Granted Break always goes overboard when Sharon or Reim are involved so this reaction isn't surprising or uncharacteristic of him; but what I find unfair to Noise is that Vincent, who is the actual mastermind behind Sharon's abduction, just goes completely scot-free, even gets a hug of forgiveness in the end; while Noise, who was simply following Vincent's orders and technically a scapegoat/his personal punching bag on whom he can take out his "frustration" as he wishes, is made out to be a villain for whom death is the only redemption,,,

Plus, to think we got an entire chapter about Noise in Rt 96/97 yet not a thing about her; cuz of course, her memories all revolve around Vincent smh. What about the reason she became a Baskerville, what about her life before she turned into a Baskerville?? Her likes, dislikes, anything personal about her?? She seems satisfied enough with the pieces of memories she recovered in the end so she can depart in peace, but hey I think I will never be satisfied by Noise's arc or ending ever. I don't know one thing about her to be very honest; say, I don't even know her real name??? Was it Zwei or was it simply a name given to her by the Baskervilles?? idk

okay but Noise aside, for your tags that I quoted:

it literally never occurred to me before that she's not even included in the “happy ending” au. like. genuinely what the fuck though TT_TT#she can't even be happily alive in a different universe??????

yk, there is one more character who fits in this exact scenario who is not included in the everybody-lives-nobody-dies-au and not even in the hundred years later: The Intention of the Abyss (😭😭)

This is from the happily ever after au, annnd Gil doesn't seem to know the Cheshire cat at all! Not even Alice?? They merely say the cat must belong to a "guest"??? Why not Alice's sister whom they maybe rescued from the Core of the Abyss and she gets to hang out with them in the real world as she always wished??? Not even in a "everything-works-out" au?? idk

Then, of course, in the hundred years later scene, where Oz and Alice have been reborn and have found their way to each other, and now to Gil, but no signs of the Intention at all!

It makes me really really sad, especially when the Intention was a child who was more or less imprisoned within the Abyss since birth for no reason (than her biological father's "experiments"), whose only wish was to see the world outside, and on realizing how her wish led to disastrous results on the world and her sister's suicide, tore apart her memories, drove herself mad and her wish changed to wanting to be destroyed, nothing more. And yet, I don't get to see her in a happy situation in an alternate universe or hundred years later??? Is it that impossible for her to find happiness??

And, honestly, I think it's the same reason for Noise as well as the Intention not getting a proper closure bc once Jack took the center stage of the series' main villain, the narrative became highly unclear where the Intention, Noise (and the rest of the Baskervilles) stood on the "villainy" scale. In the hindsight, it's true that the Jack reveal was done remarkably well; at the same time, the "initial" antagonists were swept to the side and their character arcs became rather confused and contradictory, at least, to me.

I haven't really written anything about Noise but Retrace 97 compelled me to write something about her because, by god, of all characters, Noise died the loneliest death ;-;

Break died surrounded by his friends and family. Oscar died after seeing off his kids. Even Fang got a chance to apologize to his family as he was dying. (Elliot's is another matter--but at the least, he got a conclusive death. He wanted to be the one to crack the mystery of his family's serial killing which he did and he died next to his best friend and his big brother. His death continued to be grieved by people who cared about him up until the end.)

But Noise? Yes, Oz was there while her body was breaking apart but..... he was not there for Noise--he was there for Echo. And, Ada came all the way into the Past Sablier to be there for Vincent.

But... Noise.....??

to be honest, isn't that how it's always been? Right from the beginning, nobody was ever there for Noise... this poor girl who became an anomaly because she couldn't control her chain properly, who became a Baskerville but could neither fully become one nor return to being a human either, who couldn't even sleep because her chain might take control of her body and go on a rampage, who was locked up in an underground cellar, this girl who forgot her own name because her mind was so Noisy...

In spite of all her suffering, she still used to have a kind heart before she lost all sense of self. She still looked out for Vincent in whatever way she could:

You can actually feel the loneliness radiating off her in this panel; she doesn't feel included anywhere--she is still in the dark while Vincent has been pulled out into the light by his new friends.

Yes, it is toxic of her wanting to keep Vincent to herself and trying to kill him as soon as he finds new friends in a if-I-can't-have-you-then-no-one-can way.... but both her heart as well as her mind were already completely broken at this point. All she remembers is that slight feeling of protectiveness that got twisted to being possessive over him; she wanted to continue taking care of him in her own way even if she forgot what their original relationship was like.

I actually wanted to talk about this panel too (Retrace 91):

(Let me just set aside the context that Noise is actively trying to kill Ada and Ada is trying to buy time by talking because I want to talk about their words.)

Noise says Ada shouldn't pretend like she knows everything about Vincent and Noise, which is true in a way.... Because, you see, and as much as I love Ada, I still have to admit Ada is selective in what she is trying to figure out. She wants to know more about Vincent, not Noise. She doesn't know (and probably never will) that Noise was once a good onee-san to Vincent and his only true friend when he was surrounded by manipulative adults. So, I don't think Ada is the best person to give an opinion about Noise and Vincent's history when she hardly knows anything about them?

Again, I agree with what she says. Not knowing everything is not a crime, you can always learn things later on; yes, it's true but this line:

You're being criminal by being judgemental without even trying to understand!!

--honestly, applies to Ada too? Because Ada is also being judgemental about Noise without understanding her at all. Ada (and Oz and others too, for that matter) believe that Echo is the 'kind' personality while Noise is the mindless killer personality that takes over Echo.

When, in fact, it's the other way round. It's because of the power of the Abyss (and so, indirectly her chain) that Noise started losing her mind in the first place. Her mind was filled with so much noise that she feared and had dreams of turning into a monster (idk if her mental deterioration was already present before her contract) but I do know Doldum/Duldee (Echos) was only making the matter worse. Yes, all the Echos tried to protect her heart by preserving some of her memories bit by bit but.... wasn't it also because of the chain from the Abyss that she has been suffering all along?

See, again, Ada doesn't grasp the full essence of Noise's words. Of course, she has no way of knowing unless Noise tells her but...

Noise doesn't mean here that Vincent and Noise are different because they are Baskervilles. No, she means they are different because they are the only ones who are not 'proper' Baskervilles, who are cast out from being both human and Baskerville, who are not included anywhere.

Noise was an anomaly because of her weakness to the Abyss and her inability to control her own chain. Vincent was an anomaly because he was a child of ill-omen (something that doesn't exist in Ada's timeline). And those are his words Noise repeats that since both of them were aberrations, it won't be wrong if they stayed together because then, for each other, they can be 'normal'.

Ada is really missing a huge chunk of context here. I agree wholeheartedly that Ada will accept him even if he is a Baskerville and a Child of Misfortune because she is a kind soul, she is gonna accept and forgive Vincent no matter what.

But I am not talking about Ada and Vincent here, but about Noise. The point here is that Ada doesn't understand where Noise is coming from. For Noise, Vincent was the only way she could feel 'normal', among humans or Baskervilles. She heavily related to him, she latched onto him as the only one who could understand her, she did everything, became everything Vincent asked of her; at her heart, Noise, like every character in this story, just does not want to be lonely anymore.

This panel actually made me feel so bad for Noise. Time and again, Ada stands up for Vincent, Oz stands up for Echo, but who stands up for Noise?

(btw, please don't take this in a wrong way. I love Oz and Ada, and I am genuinely amazed and touched at that they can still distinguish Echo from Noise, sympathize with Echo for being an unwilling accomplice and bear no grudge against her in spite of Noise having a major hand in Uncle Oscar's death.

I am just trying to look at the story from Noise's perspective and doing that makes me realize that most of the major characters have no idea what Noise really was like. heck, even Noise didn't know at the time of Retrace 91; she remembers the truth only at the time of her death (Retrace 97).

Because Noise, too, once was a sweet, caring soul just like the present and last Echo (Eko-chan, I will refer to her as that to differentiate her from other Echos). Bit-by-bit, Noise lost all she knew about herself the longer she used her chain and created more Echos. As I said, both Oz and Ada are judging her from what they see before their eyes, not knowing how shattered and sick her mind is at the moment. I can't blame them ofc because that's what I too might have to do when the person before me is actively trying to kill me,, but knowing the context and her backstory, her presence in the story exudes so much loneliness.)

See, you can feel the despair and tiredness already seeping into her. She starts to lash out and reject people around her, even those who care about her to some extent; she doesn't even know what she wants anymore.

She wants to meet Vincent to, she believes, kill him because he is not hers anymore. But what I think is she subconsciously still possesses the protectiveness of a big sister and knows Vincent is in trouble, that's why she wants to go after him to make sure he is okay.

She says the same here (Retrace 97):

...I've had enough. I'm already so tired...

You know, what's even sadder? Eko is not a different person. Taking away the context of a chain and the fantasy surrounding it, she is simply a personality created by the weak-minded Noise to take on her unbearable suffering (like Split Personality (DID) patients do). So when Eko says:

--and asks her to remember herself, Noise is, in fact, in a way, talking to herself. It's the last sane part of her mind that's realized that her body can't hold out longer, and talks to the shattered, tired and lonely part of her, tries to recoup some of her memories so she doesn't end up doing something she'd regret, like killing her only friend and so that she gets a proper closure in death.

To say, Noise has no one but her imaginary self to console and hold her during her final moments. She died as lonely as she lived. I am happy Echo dies in Oz's arms, but....Noise? ;_;

Annnnd, even in the Happy Ending that the author gave us--the Everyone lives/No one dies one from Retrace 104-- where is the original personality of Noise? 😭

(how I wanted to see a normal interaction between Zwei, Gil and Oz; her teasing Oz, "Echo is shy to come out and meet you, so you just have to deal with me today 😈")

Further, about Vincent and Noise--

Something Noise says about Ada (Retrace 91):

Vincent got close to you only to take advantage of you.... You were so carefree…so stupid!

Actually, her words apply to herself as well. Vincent was only using Noise as a tool to his cause because he thought she was a stupid girl who would listen to his every word.

But my question is: does he even remember Noise as that onee-san who used to look out for him? Did he know it and choose to forget? Or, did he really forget? He was even the one who gave her the nickname after she forgot her own. Is it possible he forgot who Noise was to him whereas he remembers even the traumatic events of Sablier (something Gil misplaced his memories of)? Or, did he purposely suppress his good memories so he can recall his days as a Baskerville as being full of pain so that it makes his planned death easier for him?

I don't know but there is an equal chance of him genuinely forgetting who Noise was to him and him knowing everything yet acting like he didn't. If the latter, it's totally messed up on his part. Because Noise forgetting herself doesn't mean Vincent can distort their original relationship? How could he cross the boundary and do what he pleases to a broken, amnesiac girl who used to be his big-sister-like figure once?

This is the reason I am kind of skeptical about Ada saying she would forgive Vincent for everything. Offering him forgiveness for his past mistakes that he committed as a misguided, manipulated child is perfectly alright; but his deeds as an adult? Sorry but Ada doesn't even know half the picture of what Vincent really is like.

Either way, her last thoughts for Ada and Vincent were so sweet and makes me wish she was around, at least, in the Alternate Ending as the cool big sister for the kids.

Another heart-breaking line:

I never wanted to hurt him. Not even if there was no place for me at his side

Why does everything have to be a love triangle? Why can't everyone be a huge fun found family so that nobody feels left out and lonely? I wonder what Noise would be like when she is not in captivity or despair-fuelled-killing-spree. I feel like she would be feisty and sharp-witted, a complete opposite of the shy Echo, and would be going around trolling and teasing the kids lol

Ending this with the panel here, because in spite of their rocky relationship, chatting with Vincent were the few times Noise genuinely smiled ;-;

#rereblog #noise baskerville #retrace xxxviii #retrace civ #intention of the abyss #alyss baskerville #neither of these girls have a proper name even???#noise doesn't remember her name #alice's name was shared between them and levi really named his child.... Intention wtf #and unpopular opinion maybe: but i really dislike the whole mystification of twins the two-souls-one-body trope every series #seems to use??? no??? they are two different people with different likes and dislikes and different personalities #i am you and you are me (and jjk uses this to simply kill off an abuse victim bc hey her i-am-you sister still lives on)#probs that's the reason we don't see the intention in any of the aus bc if alice is there #it's same as intention being there as well but i am not so in agreement there #even in the series it's shown how cheshire liked intention but not alice they are two different people what was the intention the girl #really like??? was she as cruel as vincent and jack make her out to be or as sweet as cheshire thinks of her? nobody knows

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