#like srs- am i that fucking dumb?

[kingwolfie08]

short king real!!!

oh look- two drawings in one day. thats a first.

[krynutsreal]

my 'laughing it off to not cry' plan that I had used for 3 years of highschool has come to bite me back in the ass because now everytime I do cry or am close to I start instead laughing like a maniac um what the flip

[hauntingblue]

Evangelion movie hello

[the-one-who-died-at-the-end]

My hairdresser apparently has healing proprieties and/or dermatology degrees I was unaware of because he declared that I don't have psoriasis but "just" a light eczema, and when I tried to explain that I was diagnosed with it on my scalp and elbow he just shrugged and went like "Yeah but everyone has psoriasis on their elbow".

I want to scream.

[screw-fandom-urls-anyway]

Tag time

[zorosleftmantit101]

One piece men reacting to you telling them.

"-You make my heart feel warm"

Characters: Luffy, Zoro, Sanji, kid, killer, buggy, crocodile, corazon, shanks, ace, sabo, mihawk, smoker, Katakuri

A/N: Thought I should probably throw in some fluff a lil bit of crack.

I made Sabo a lil french man ❤���

C/W: fluff, Swearing, mentions of heart attacks, mentions of telling ppm to kts.

Luffy:

"Are you having a heart attack?"

Zoro:

"me?" Staring at you with disbelief.

"No Zoro the fucking wall... yes you!"

Growls and pouts at you being an ass but will pull you into his lap.

"You make my heart feel warm too~"

"What was that Zoro?"

"NOTHING I UHH TOLD YOU TO KILL YOURSELF!"

Sanji:

What are you gonna say at my funeral now that you've killed me.

"A loving partner and a strong fighter, Sanji will br forever missed"

Sanji

2004- 2023

Death by nose bleed/s

Kid:

"Yeah well your a shit."

Your sad cause you was just tryna be a cutie

Dw I got you come to me *licks lips deviously*

As your walking away all sad Kid yanks your arm so your sitting on his lap.

"I guess you make my heart feel things too, but dont go letting that get to your head!"

Killer:

"Oh cool didn't know I could do that"

He's not dumb he's just being a dickhead on purpose to get a reaction out of you.

Buggy:

"I do? I- uhhh I mean OF COURSE I DO I AM THE GREAT MPPH-"

Shut this man up with a massive smooch or a fist to the face your choice.

Crocodile:

"Is that so darling~"

His calloused fingers motion for you to come forward.

Walking towards him as he sits at his desk he pulls your hand into his brining it to his lips.

"Your so cute doll, one day im going to put a ring on this finger make you mine- make your heart only warm for me~"

Mihawk:

"Ok"

Corazon:

Grabs your wrist kissing it while smiling before twirling you and dipping yoy in his embrace

"Mm you make me heart bloom like the flowers in a thousand springs my love~"

You where ready to ravish the man right there if he didn't trip sending the two of you crashing to the floor..

Ace:

"Say on god"

Sabo:

"You flatter me Mademoiselle, my heart warms at your affection as well"

Shanks:

"Thats kinda gay"

Smoker:

"Oh thats nice umm you make my heart feel... umm..."

*proceeds to walk away out of sheer embarrassment*

Katakuri:

"Are you /srs or /j"

[pianostarinwonderland]

maybe skully isnt dead 🤯 [half copium half srs]

listen. ik ive been on copium for a while. ik we all are, ive seen twitter, tumblr, and everyone’s tags on my posts when they reblog

BUT PLS HEAR ME OUT. IM SO SERIOUS RN WHEN I SAY: if u wanna be technical about it, if u wanna stretch it out somehow, you can argue that the game never outright states that skully is dead, only that the skully we met was from hundreds of years ago.

“but mamsir pianostarinwonderland, how in the fuck can that be???? we HEARD that invisible kiss” LET ME COOKKKKKK 🔥🔥🔥 I SWEAR EVERYONE, I AM COOKING U JUST HAVE TO HEAR ME OUUUUUUUUUUUUUT— knocked out

Ok serious time, let me mansplain to you all the possibility of Skully being alive

Establishing first of all, Twst has kept Skully's nature vague

Simply put: we don't know if Skully is human. In his live 2D, Skully's ears are completely covered. Even in his illustration, we can barely see his ears. It's an interesting design choice. However, in his chibi (which wasn't revealed until Episode 5), we can see his ears aren't shaped like a fae, but are round like that of a human.

However, it's pretty hard to think he's human either, when we consider his "moshi, ne moshi" greeting in Episode 1 and its connection to the supernatural. Voiced, to be noted. Exactly what kind of creature he could be is currently unknown, but because this part was voiced, it's something we need to pay attention to at the very least.

In regards to his mortality, the only clue we're really given is Skully himself saying that he may never meet us except through Halloween, which implies a lifespan similar to a human or something similar. But Skully doesn't know how far into the future that the cast is from. Heck, does he even know of his nature?

Now, addressing that invisible kiss...

I feel like this is the main thing that told all of us that Skully is long gone. Heck, if you catch me in my right mind, I might just tell you that yeah, that should be enough proof that Skully is dead! Little signs from the dead such can manifest in similar ways to what Jamil and Leona sensed: hearing a kiss and feeling a kiss on your hand.

(unfortunately i'm not in my right mind so you're getting my dumb reasons why i'm arguing for otherwise)

However, if Skully is gone, I find it interesting that this is the way they decide to show it. We already know from the very first Halloween event that ghosts can manifest all year round in Night Raven College due to the high concentration of magical power in the area. Outside of that, they cannot be seen. If they really wanted to confirm with the audience that Skully is a ghost, they could have had him appear as such at the end, when they all returned to Night Raven College.

But they chose a scenario where people can draw a lot of conclusions from it: Is their senses getting fucked over as they wake up? Are they still reeling from the magic of the book? (though rationally, we know that Leona is not one to be easily stunned, so the first question is at the very least easy to dismiss)

I've also seen some people theorize that he's using invisibility magic during the invisible kiss scene. And well, while I find that funny, it makes me wonder if he could be some other kind of spirit that's not dead. Like an undead of some sort, which the residents of Halloween Town are. Heck, Azul's card line about Skully talks about how he seems to fit right at home with the Halloween Town residents. Again, we don't know Skully's true nature, but the possibility of him being a species that can turn invisible is interesting.

Moving on, we have what Dire Crowley stated about Skully

At the end of the event, Crowley tells us that he found Skully’s portrait while rummaging through the storage and shows it to us and the 11 boys who went inside the book

What he tells us is that Skully J. Graves is a NRC graduate from hundreds of years ago, before Crowley was Headmage. Note that he only was appointed for the position 100 years ago; the Skully we met is at least from around 200 years ago. During his NRC years, Skully got to share Halloween to NRC. It was a hit, and when he graduated, he spread Halloween all over the world in his travels.

I'd like to take a little detour first to discuss something that's been weighing on my mind: Some people have thought that Crowley is lying to us when he speaks about Skully and his achievements, but... I don't see why he would lie. For one, there is a decent chance that Crowley might not have gotten to see Skully. Even if he did, it's even more unsure if he was involved in Skully's affairs.

However, there's one main reason why I do think that Skully got to live a fulfilling life instead of facing an overblot that killed him or some other tragedy. I'd like to dedicate a longer post to this matter, but to make it concise, I think through Skully, Twst is starting to establish something new regarding their history. I think that historical teachings, folktales and stories, and rumors that are well-known tend to be lies or twisted truths. Whereas those that are obscure and not known are actually what occurred. Skully is called the King of Halloween who's done so much to spread the holiday to the world, yet not even NRC students, who should be the first to know considering that Skully is an alumna, know of him. Although there may be other reasons why that's the case, I like to think that at the very least, Skully's obscurity indicates that he did live the life he wanted and succeeded in working for a future that generations after him can enjoy.

Anyway, that actually isn't the main point of this section of the post, but I kind of want to air that out first. The main point is that Crowley only really said that Skully is a former NRC student from hundreds of years ago who traveled around the world to spread Halloween. But he never told us where he was buried or whether he saw his ghost roaming NRC. He never said anything about Skully being dead.

He probably said the hundreds of years ago bit, carrying the assumption that of course, Skully may have passed away. But we have to remember that we have long-living species in Twisted Wonderland. Fae that were students 200 years ago are very likely to be alive now. Crowley himself is a long-living creature, having been Headmage for 100 years. I think with that in mind, it's important for him to emphasize that Skully's gone if he really is. But he never mentioned it. Therefore, there is a good chance that Skully might just be somewhere else. That or Crowley just doesn't give a fuck where his alumni go, and I might be thinking too deeply about the absence of certain words. Honestly, that's a pretty good chance too.

Lastly, we have the scene where Jack Skellington gets shot down but survives it

Here's where it gets a bit more into speculation, but you're going to have to hear me out.

In the movie, Jack Skellington gets shot down by the military for impersonating Santa Claus. When the Halloween Townspeople watched it, they all despaired, and the mayor started declaring to all that Jack has been blown to smithereens and proclaimed him dead.

But that's not what happened: we find Jack landing on an angel's statue, alive and definitely not blown to smithereens.

And considering that Skully is still very much twisted from Jack Skellington... do you think the writers are pulling a similar move? Making us think that he's dead, just as the townspeople thought he was dead, only for us to learn eventually that he's alive.

This of course depends on what happens eventually in the sequel. From the way things are proceeding, what happened in the Lost in the Book with TNBC is events prior to the movie, and we could very well have the sequel be set during the movie events. (If you ask me, I kind of doubt that actually. I feel like Skellington got inspired by Skully's love for Halloween, enough to stay true to his identity as the Pumpkin King, which would mean the movie wouldn't happen the way we know it. So if anything, I feel like TNBC 2 would focus less on the actual movie and more on the side games where Oogie takes over Halloween Town and even kidnaps Santa and other people, but I admit, that's a stretch, especially considering that we will get Santa giving Halloween Town a taste of Christmas)

Of course, this post is really just to let some of my copium out. Rn, it's still safe to assume that yea, Skully's dead. And though I am coping hard for Skully to be alive, with the way Twst treats the dead, it's not exactly a bad thing. Ghosts continue to stay in NRC like they're living people. They honor the dead, and let the dead live among them. And even if he is in the afterlife and not stuck in the mortal plane, I have faith that Skully did live a fulfilling life that may have been forgotten but clearly changed the world. :'D

[alexxncl]

‼️NIGHTBRINGER LESSON 46 SPOILERS‼️

masterlist | all lessons | season 3 | lesson 45.1 | lesson 45.2 | lesson 47

i'll probaboy be moving my baby sister into college when this queues up 🥲 sob sob

slight lesson 76 spoilers

we love to see more of a lighthearted lesson

ah yes, siblings 🫶🏽 levi is me, i am levi

i also love the fact that luci, mams, levi, and simeon are all working together to help mammon

it's clear how much they all adore him even if they're shitheads sometimes (read: most of the time)

anyone else having war flashbacks to cocytus? no? just me? kay.

see now they're just making up words bc what are we talking about 😭 also love how they didn't bother to make a 2D CG picture for it bc it's never gonna be mentioned in another lesson after this point

...i'd have to kms

imagine every step you take leads to a blood curdling scream...everybody's dying idc

"dear, sweet henry 1.0" my ASS

homeboy didn't even remember you when y'all were trapped in that made and had to get charmed by asmo 😭

...unless that was his way of telling levi to make new friends, just like the way he left levi in the anime bc levi had no friends outside of henry

but i also wanna see the full extent of mammon's power 🧍🏾 the devs need to stop giving us cut scenes every time my man steps up to fight a monster

that's hilarious actually

imagine some lower level demon actually ended up getting eaten bc they couldn't beat the monsters and the "research" was all in vain

leave it to me to read too far into things 🤞🏽

example x of mammon being lucifer's favorite and most trusted brother

regardless of how dumb mammon thinks a task is, he'll do his best to get it done as perfectly as possible if it means keeping up a good image for lucifer or making lucifer happy. lucifer knows this despite rarely, if ever, admitting it to himself, mammon, or anyone else, and that's why he trusts mammon with serious shit when the situation calls for it

granted, the speech mammon is giving probably wasn't orchestrated by lucifer, but the way it goes still reflects on him and diavolo, and mammon knows better than to make his big brother and the future demon king look bad in front of who knows how many people

MAMMON SIMPS HOW WE FEELING????

they absolutely would've fucked backstage if he wasn't up next for his speech /srs

they fucked in the back of class and they'd do it again BOP BOP

also mammon's speech being "get off your lazy asses and go touch grass" was easily the best idol about this lesson. 10/10 writing

about the first screenshot, why is nobody in-game verbally commenting on simeon wearing his angelic clothes ??? didn't he stop wearing them as soon as he fell from grace in the og timeline ?????

or maybe this is a result of too many time soup shenanigans. maybe his body can't tell if he's human or still an angel

but it's clear that everyone's noticed something's off with simeon even if they haven't said anything to him verbally, which is why luke was so hellbent on mc asking simeon if he was okay. but nobody's outright saying anything bc this mf will deny any and every concern thrown at him with a smile on his face. he won't even tell mc what's going on, so lucifer had to step in

ending the hard bonus chapter like this was VILE but in the best way possible

[bearofohu]

it’s 1 am and im thinking about how truly insanely unfair the layton fandom was about marina triton while lmda was airing

i remember one of the most common complaints was ppl saying luke and marina had no substance to their relationship

like really. are you /srs or /j. did u watch the relic stone arc. did you see that shit rainbow dash

marina triton literally spent 10 yrs pretending to be in a cult to save her cringe man. 10 years. 10 years of her life spent in a cult to save him while he was cryogenically frozen. like holy fucking shit. kat would’ve never fucking found them at all if not for her

like the layton series is so infamous for reducing it’s female characters (barring emmy) to either Irrelevant Or Dead and the ONE woman we had that quite literally did the hardest thing in the name of love and some of y’all shat on her bc she didnt fit ur hc for luke or whatever

like yea we didnt get a lot about her but like we didn’t get a lot about fucking ANYBODY from the relic stone arc. it’s just a story that was too big to be told as a side plot in an anime for kids. it should be it’s own game

but even with how little we got from marina what we did get was fucking insanely girlypop and im sick of us pretending it wasnt. even worse acting like she’s just luke’s dumb bad woman love interest. like i’m biting you fr

[xx-slug-xx]

//rant where I just go off about the recent antis who have been going around. There’s been so many that I’ve seen, so it’s not about any particular users tbh. Like, my dash is filled with different antis and I wanted to say something about it lol

The recent rise of certain antis not knowing how to spell, using abbreviations for almost every word they type, and talking like they can’t be any older than 15 is really concerning tbh.

And when I say “taking like they can’t be any older than 15”, I mean they lack any sort of argument or desire to have one while using patterns in their text that is shocking similar to middle schoolers to early high schoolers using (all the way down to the slang, abbreviations, and punctuations). Everything boils down to “lol kys pedo 💀”. Like, do they not realize how dumb they sound? Do they not realize that every anon ask I get that sounds at all like this, I just delete it and move on with my day? Nobody takes them seriously besides the antis who are on the same wavelength as them, and that’s not something they should be proud of (they are proud btw). And they really think they are getting somewhere with it. Really it’s just annoying :/ I used to be an internet troll back in my day (13 to be exact lol), and what made it fun wasn’t the “hahaha I hate you” aspect of it, it was the debate. Well, for me at least. So I really don’t understand this whole thing that these new antis who have been showing up on my dash lately who have absolutely no point to be made, contradict themselves, and don’t even bother to look at anything other than a label someone uses. What do they gain from this? Like seriously. There’s no gain from my perspective when nobody is taking what you say with any seriousness and your just a minor annoyance.

I really am concerned though, and this is regardless of this new wave’s actual ages, because I’m not assuming that they are minors without proof of such (I have reason to have high suspicion that they are minors, but that’s not relevant) (and if they are minors, who fucking told them it was at all ok to interact with people who they think are pedophiles?). But like, do folks not realize that harassment with no real logic behind it just makes them look stupid when it’s done in this fashion? Like, harassment in general is dumb, but this is worse for some reason imo. I’m in awe tbh, like, /srs on this one. I’m concerned about people’s basic literacy skills and their ability to think about things rationally. If this wave consisted of people who had valid criticism and wanted to hold a debate about the topics at hand (which, personally, I love the antis who are like this because I love holding serious discussion on complicated topics), then it would be a completely different story. But there’s been nothing but stupidity clogging up my dash lately, and I’m kinda annoyed :/

I’m also waiting for the antis who have been perusing the proship tags lately to see this and say something lmao

[bangtan-junkie]

„then don’t read it“ where’s the logic in that? how am I supposed to know what you’ve wrote when i didn’t get to read it at first make it make sense. i can only comment on it afterwards which is what i‘ve done and if you can’t cope with the fact that you didn’t write anything new then that’s on you and not on me because i didn’t choose to be mainstream and write the exact same shit 10-15 other people have written. if you can’t take the things I’ve said srs then only because you know you have nothing to proof that speaks against my claim and observations otherwise you wouldn’t say dumb ass shit. get fucking going babe i can link you 10 or more fics with the same storyline maybe then you’d stop acting obvious

that’s what the synopsis is for silly, it tells you the plot before you start reading :) you said so much nothing babe. you chose to read it and then you got mad 💀 if you made it to the end, obviously you liked something in there lol

[childofwonder]

I’m having a problem again. /srs /hj

I cannot understand Will’s character motivation for all of season 3.

I’m trying to comprehend it, I really am.

But like. Do you want to kill this man or do you want to run away with him?! The whole season I’m waiting and waiting for this man to kill Hannibal or run away with him and he DOES NEITHER.

Like he changes his mind every other second.

I HATE THIS SHOW. /not srs

FUCK YOU BRYAN FULLER /hj

I know the answer is both. He wants to kill him and run away with him, he would run away to prevent Hannibal’s death from someone else and then kill him himself. But then he’s also ready to watch the dragon kill Hannibal. WHICH DOESNT WORK BECAUSE THEN HE IMMEDIATELY GOES AND ATTACKS THE DRAGON TO SAVE HANNIBAL. AND LIKE WHILE THEY ARE ON THE RUN POST FALL ARE THEY STILL IN THIS LIMBO OF TRYING TO KILL EACH OTHER?! I DONT GET IT

I want to get it. I really want to get it. But it just doesn’t make sense. Not saying that Will can’t feel both ways about Hannibal but he really isn’t clear on it with himself or the audience. (THIS IS THE POINT RIGHT?!??! THATS HE DOESNT KNOW HOW HE FEELS???) PLEASE IM SO FUCKING CONFUSED. sometimes the fandom are really singular with Will like he only has one motivation. Usually people are like “he loves him, he doesn’t want to kill him.” BUT HE DOES WANT TO KILL HIM. FOR TWO SEASONS. LIKE YALL ARE MISSING IT OR IM DUMB? I CANT UNDERSTAND.

All this to say that I’m going to rewatch season two and three again.

But seriously. Will wants to kill him but can’t go through with it, right?? That’s the point. OR ELSE WHY ARE WE HERE? I refuse to misunderstand this show. I remember I was so clear about it when I first watched it and now it’s all murky in my mind. Eek

I don’t usually post these blog posts cuz I know they can be a little inflammatory. but whateva

I just want to understand the writing of season three better and this is how my thought process works.

Anyways, when I finish reading Red Dragon it’s over for you bitches (I’m going to be making so many blog posts comparing the show to the book. FRANCIS WILL BE A REALLY BIG FOCUS OF MINE. and Will, and Molly) (and Willy)

Sorry I just keep yapping at you, have a song suggestion for compensation (ITS SO HANNIGRAM CODED)

[prophet-stargazrr]

ー intro

hey. im cyrus, also known as cyrus de lys or my maiden name (not really. a maiden. but you get what i mean) cyrus akagi

heres some useless but interesting enough fun facts about me. feel free to scroll btw

im happily married. have been for like 500+ years. i love my husband so much & i will kill anyone who dares breathe on him wrong or even intend to do something to him /srs

technically the label is demiboy but im kinda questioning that rn. he/they/cosmo pronouns for me blehh

i also hold grudges very easily. i dont forgive easily & i will remember if you do something. i am petty & i am shameless about it. be fucking mad about it

im one of these giratina prophets or whatever. i also have abilities or powers from palkia & dialga so i can do alot of cool stuff. so yeah

im from sinnoh so im not white. dont go assuming im a white boy thats cringe ngl

i really like video games i play them alot too. so if you wanna talk about them or ask for tips or whatever feel free

i love astronomy. its my special interest & i know so much about it. please ask & talk to me about space & shit. please /nf

im autistic as fuck & i fuckin act like it. i use tone tags sometimes & i sometimes need them for context. i dont get hints or social cues they fly right over my head. please use tone tags /gen /srs

oh & also heres my dumb stupid trainer card

volcarona- gochujang [they/them] ー kirlia- danseuse [he/she] ー shaymin- geotjeori [they/them] ー weavile- buchae [she/her] ー mimikyu- seukechi [they/them]

send asks & i'll tag them with whatever. sometimes i'll reblog shit i find cool

[i-have-dots-in-my-brain]

ayup mates, its me (that one fucking guy that shows up in your fever dreams to offer you garlic bread then fucks off into the void) (i think you need to get a therapist btw)

Call me dots or dot (not correct but when saying something belongs to me you use "dot's". idk why don't ask me)

My cara page (for art): https://cara.app/ihavedotsinmybrain

They/them she/her it/its ( welcome to the mad lab we do experiments with the funny goofy hjinks with the genders here)

TAG GUIDE : my art (self explanatory), dot's thoughts (mad ramblings) (extra note, there are two versions of dot's thoughts, the other one is with the phone version of ' so you can go look for that if you wanna see me posting from outside the comfort of my room and computer), dot’s travel journal (me on holiday), my persona (obviously just my persona) *prone to updates

dumbass who likes to draw ocs and shit. (posts like there is no tomorrow but also like i have all the time in the world) (oc x canon stuff also) (some fanart ig)

if you wanna find my (mostly serious) art, check out @dots-in-my-head (send me asks and dms on this blog) also i have started putting fandom stuff there too so if you want to get my fandom doodles you can look to there as well

still questioning sexuality but currently aro/ace? (idk i'm not in a rush lol) (i WILL dabble in the arts of questioning me sexuality on internet if you got problems with that shoo)

my loveley husband (@octoxxt, pls ignore this blog dude its embarrassing)

why do you need to know my age, ‘you a cop?

will not draw smut or NSFW bcs i will start howling with racous laughter and melt. (i don;t even read smut in fic dude what do expect me to be able to draw im a cartoonish obviously anime style inspired semi-realism but not really shitty doodle artist you put your hopes too high if you think i can draw a dick without making it look like a piece of middle school desk graffiti)

i've got a bit of a dirty mouth but everything is pretty vanilla . (i make edgy dumb jokes sometimes, but it's not my actual personality peace 'n love on planet earth okay) (any time i say i wanna kms IT IS A JOKE) (most of my posts are /srs i will mark it if its a joke i know the pain of not knowing if it was a funny joke or not i gotchu other autistic peeps)

please talk to me god i am lonely (i am serious about this i love it when people rb and scream in the tags it genuinely makes my day) (send me asks send measkssendmeaskssendmeasks—)

Absolute art machine(whether the art is good or not is a big question that i am not ready to answer) makes shitty animations sometimes idk.

Uses lol too much. Chinese, knows mandarin (translate the random messages for maximum brain damage) i don't know simplified but i do know traditional (please talk to me i need to practice my chinese reading skills) am i a furry? idk but if you're mad about it you can fuck right off (i have a couple ocs and my darling fursona)

am currently inbetween fandoms, fandoms i am (kind of) active in are hetalia, scp, dnd, genshin, pjo, bg3, apothecary diaries, jrwi riptide and csm (list is prone to updating because fandom is my support system) (you wont see my art for most of them but the brainworms are there and sometimes i let them take over)

old fandoms or the fandoms i lurk in (i visit them often): eddsworld, demon slayer, pokemon, vocaloid and wof. (also prone to updates as i remember stuff)

note : i am still in school and have a life outside the internet so stuff will be delayed (which is why i am only kind of active) (i go missing sometimes i am not dead life is just lifing for me)

Do not say anything about how cringe I am I know trust me (it’s a coping mechanism lol)

if you're concerned, you're very right to be. I am very incoherent (most of my life updates have actually devolved into cries for help, please talk to me)

also if you don't like my art or ships just leave(any critique about anything i make shoots a bazooka straight into my heart and behind the screen i crumble into a cartoonish pile of ashes and bones as i stare at the screen blurred by tears) (unless I ask for critique then i brought this on myself and i’ll walk it off don't worry)

(Both of my personas)

My flags (might be updated)

[talisidekick]

The incel to trans pipeline is real, huh?

I ............. really wouldn't know. I'm not celibate, I lost my virginity at um ... well ... lets just say before 18 and if I choose not to have sex, it's 1000% voluntary because my DM's are overflowing with horny to the point I generally don't know what to do (like wtf, I'm flattered but holy fffffffffuuu-). I don't even have an OnlyFans and I've been solicited for sex multiple times ... by women mostly (say you're gay and a trans girl and holy shit). I have a partner I'm married to (I love you), a girlfriend (I love you too), and a Dom (Mistress, if I wasn't supposed to say anything, I'm sooooo sorry, please forgive me). So uh ... yeah!

I find this ask hilarious because I know it's trying to be insulting but ...

... this was me casually pre-HRT, and this fake improvisation of a man never once had a problem getting laid or getting shamelessly hit on, and this ...

... dumb moron of a girl that is me now is somehow min-maxing her dating pool options despite being very cozy with what she's got right now. Like, I could maybe do a one-night stand once I have the confidence in myself but ... I've been threatened to be left drooling in the sheets of some very aggressive lesbians, and more than a few enbies have uh ... shared some vivid descriptions of how wrecked I'd be if we hooked up, and am scared.

I recognize this is kind of flexing, but like ... I'm transitioning for myself, and fully expected my sex appeal to tank and my options to go down, not sky rocket up where I'm genuinely terrified. I'm only 2 and 1/2 years in, without FFS or SRS/GRS. The FUCK am I going to be dealing with in 5 years?!? Or post "the cutening" of FFS?!?!?! ... or post SRS/GRS?!?!

So like, fuck you, but also ... fuck me, what is even happening right now?!

[protect-daniel-james]

Absolutely want a round of head canons.

What are some thoughts that have never exactly made it into fics maybe but that need to be out there???

Oh wow, I will try my best to remember some of them, the list is very incomplete:

Daddy Abramovich - there are so many headcanons about him, most of them will be in the fic I am constantly working on, but lets just say he had a bad time in the army service, he is a survivor in more senses than one, and he lives by the motto "God helps those who help themselves". He is, after all, an optimist. Even now, he feels (imagines, dreams about) like he will reunite with Sheva, and have an opportunity to explain everything to his poor little brain.

Sheva - fears being kidnapped by Daddy A. Uh, yeah, sorry, we are going right in. And what is more, he fears being convinced by Daddy A that he did nothing wrong, and falling for him all over again. What would he give for the feeling of safety and guidance he used to feel once in his company!

Unai - he (canonically) cheated on his wife, but I feel like he did that because he is so Confused about his Emotions and Feelings and Urges and Sexuality. Like, I headcanon him as feeling frustrated and never understood/appreciated/loved for his real self, always struggling with his sense of self-worth, searching for what he thought would be The Love (or, honestly The Pleasure) - until he realized that there was only Football for him. And Football is his Love. I never really included much of his previous affairs in the enfermo fics because they are a thing of the past - but they are definitely part of who Unai is.

Lampardverse - Frank Sr. wasn't as shitty father as Franko likes to see him as. He did good things for Franko. He often didn't know how to express his fatherly love - because, where would he learn it? - but he definitely did care about Franko (and still does care about him) and tried to give him a good life in the old fashioned "my son is my heir" mentality. He rarely (if ever) told Franko that he loved him or was proud of him, because he expected Franko to know it from the things he did for him. Obviously, Franko as a child didn't really understand this - and he saw how ... uh, loving Uncle Harry was with his boys, how much fun they could have, how Jamie Jamie cousin Jamie and Mark adored their dad (at least when they were really young, I think Mark guessed something was wrong later on) - and he missed this in his own life and his own relationship with his Father. Nowadays Franko tries to avoid any contact with his Dad, and it hurts them both - because his father thinks he might have failed as a dad, and Franko is clinging to the "my father yelled at me when I was 12 and I never got over that nor have I ever told him that it hurt me" mentality. They just both sit in their respective homes, sad and round and aging.

Ange - he is very experienced when it comes to (gay) sex. I imagine he was living it up in the 1980s. I mean, look at his hair and moustache at those times. That man's moustache tickled a few inner thighs.

Pippo Inzaghi - he does get jealous of Mone, and then feels bad because it's Mone, his little Mone. Mind you Pippo probably doesn't realize that for like 20+ years, little Mone has been calling the shots in their relationship. Pippo is a little dumb.

Anthony Gordon - he definitely tried to flirt with Eddie Howe, hoping to be the special boy once again, like he was with Lampard. Eddie was weirded out by this. Probably tried to get Gordon to talk to a psychologist (I don't think Anthony would be up for that, he definitely doesn't feel like being with Frank affected him in any negative way). Eddie has no time for this bullshit. I think he would ask Jason what he makes out of the situation, and I am sure they would both agree that they would have never thought Lampard to be a creep who preys on young lads but then again....maybe it's not a surprise at all.

Also have I mentioned that Franko and his cousin Jamie fuck regularly these days? (we haven't gotten there yet in the Lampardverse fics lmao)