#like some parents are shitty and i wouldnt put it past some parents to do this

[dolla-dolla-yeah]

@chrissamaxwell That is literally always my fear when I see new dolls being resold, or really any doll

Another girl at goodwill too soon

[unkat]

i am playing around with the idea of naturally ending chilchuck/his wife as a narrative, with a lot of headcanon interpolation of events. this is led by my fanfic brain which is looking at a different end game. i am marcilling it.

canonically he did not contact his daughters or wife for those years after she left. i struggle to imagine how it must feel for your life partner to let you disappear from his life and stopped contacting your shared kids at the same time, diving even more headfirst into his work that made you feel abandoned in the first place.

i think chilchuck thinks he is doing what is best for them by working hard on improving the respect for half-foots and not telling them about his work life. i can see him thinking that this is too much for them to worry about, so he can protect them by not disclosing anything but a censored version of events, minimizing the danger and death he faces whenever he leaves. i think before he started working in the dungeon, he was a lot more open about it with her, back when the complaints were just shitty customers.

but its not like she wouldnt notice, once he started advocating for higher safety regulations. like. what if each time he came home, he had some new frightening clause to add to his contract, and brushed off her attempts to get details as to why he put it there? and that feeling is not something their kids would be able to overlook once they get old enough to go from parent-child caretaker to parent-child friendship/advisor.

so yeah! when she actually meets his coworkers and realizes how much he has been leaving out about his life, its like he is a totally different person than the man she has been living with for the past 13 years. she has been lied to through omission, and he cant read the room that she needed him to trust her. so, she does something drastic to get his attention (and, very importantly, give herself fulfillment). and then he never calls, never writes, never reaches out for years of her life.

personally i think it would make sense for her to find something of her own, like a hobby or job, after her children have grown, and through that there could someone who can give her enough emotional support to fall in love again.

by the time he returns, he was a good man and great father, but a lousy husband, and she does not want to throw away the happiness she found without him. i think they loved each other for so long that it would be easy to fall back into that fondness after they both had a serious couple of conversations. but the ship to go back to how things were has sailed, and neither of them should try to go back to how things were. there is still love there, just in a different form than it was before.

i guess i kinda like the idea of growth that is staggered from each other due to their communication problems, if i had to make them lines moving in parallel. they fell out of sync understanding each other, and by the time they caught back up, they have missed the window to be as close as they were before. kinda a "right place, wrong time" by the time chilchuck has finished canon. i think there is beauty in the imperfections of damaged relationships, the fallibility of human nature, healing by falling apart.

could they have both been that loyal to the commitment and still work hard to fall back into love? i think its possible, but it should be as difficult as it needs to be for both of them to feel like this is a real change. chilchuck retiring might make that easier or harder for her- less stressful job, but he needs to actually put aside time for them and not fixate on his career, which would be hard if he is still a driving force behind civil movements on top of starting his business.

[hekkoto]

Do you really think anyone cares? Yo, Im feeling like shit and intoxicating myself helps only for short while so I guess I must push myself to focus fully on art and put my pain into this. So yeah, today Im doing 24h art challenge, I will be recording it so expect it soon on my YT (✧ω✧) subscribe to not miss it! https://www.youtube.com/@hekkoto I wasnt in such awful state or a very long time. I guess fact my meds and doctors costs a lot is killing me, especially that my future doesnt look too good. Actually if my parents would stop paying for my meds I wouldnt be able to afford it and... welp... I want black coffin and I want be buried in my wedding dress >XD I would love to be more positive but I have shitty past and no matter how hard I try stuff is still awful. Is it some stupid test to try out how long I can go like this? So yea, I gonna draw a lot I guess, record videos and stuff just to not think and not feel and if feelings will be super hard to handle I must pour it onto paper, not myself. Actually Im quite proud of myself I didnt came back to self harm yet. Tho border is thin ;D My husband told me to not make such long descriptions, just talk about art and thats all. But welp, its my little diary and my little story. Story I would call 'Neverending suffering'. It wont matter if Im popular or not if I will die. And I want share this story to help people like me, to show I understand this pain but I still keep going. Perhaps I will inspire someone to not die. Cause I never had anyone to listen or understand me so I was let all alone with my art as my source of strenght. Now I have my husband and its better, he understands most of my issues and supports me, is with me even tho its super tiring to deal with someone like me And I wanna thank a lot everyone who comments and likes, it really means a lot for me. You give me strenght too ^^ wanna support my evil dark empire? Im accepting souls on Patreon and Ko-fi! -> Hekkoto Huge thanks to all of my Patrons and people who donate <3

[nerves-nebula]

I'm sorry but I was thinking about TC being in the basement and my next thought was that what if that's where Vee is. Like Belos collected her as a stray right? so he might pull the whole "You gotta keep your presence scarce/secret or else someone might find you, and I don't want you to get hurt" as a way to keep her in the basement and sometimes throw down food and water bottles (when he doesn't have her doing chores or whatever).

BONUS does he still experiment on Vee like Vee had been in cannon? idk what Belos would experiment in this AU but that would be a horrifying position to be in, thinking you ran away to somewhere safe and then being stuck in this guys basement and being forced to perform tasks without really being able to leave.

Anyways you OP are so good at making interesting character dynamics, honestly inspirational <- I wanna be as good as you some day

OK OK okk so Vee in this AU is probably the kid least enamored by Philip, so she probably ends up in the basement/closets a lot of the time just cause she ignores him and hides from him, and he HATES that. But I also don't know how violent Philip gets with her, cause a lot of the time he just ignores her back. He's disappointed that his plans for her aren't turning out because it's harder to manipulate her than the others. (because her parents died instead of abandoning her, so she isn't as desperate for affection/parental approval. she knows what a nice family is supposed to be like and has just never really liked Philip even before her parents died)

I wouldn't put it past him to just have a little corner of the basement set up for her though. With like a shitty little bed and a rug and a lamp & desk or whatever. But I'm not sure if he'd lock TC in there with her if that was the case, because then TC wouldn't really be punished because he'd have company and entertainment and it wouldnt be all dark and scary.

im not sure what Philip is up to either, actually, so I'd say as a rule of thumb that he DOES experiment on her, IF I can figure out what he'd be experimenting with. otherwise, I'll just scrap that idea.

as for your compliment: STOPPPP YOUR GONNA MAKE ME BLUSHHHHHH afsdafsd;fdsafsdmf im really just remixing things ive seen before (irl and in fiction)

[irrelevaantidiot]

sorry for the fuckin vent but idk where else im supposed to put this bullshit

trigger warning, pls scroll past this post if u want, theres a lot of yucky/sensitive topics

man whenever i remember some shit i just start fuckin sobbing man

i had this friend, this friend was like a parent to me and then this fuckin asshole just,, ruined me. mf ruined me and i didnt see through that until like, what, a few months ago? ive had countless breakdowns when i remember the damage and one of those instances is right now hahh i fuckin hate this hoe sm. the worst FUCKIN PART is that they got away with it. and i just. man. i hope the road to hell is agony for this son of a bitch. i need to stop talking about the situation, nothing will come out of it. nothing will fix the wound. if i called this hoe out it wouldnt do shit. it'd be like putting a bandaid on a huge wound. the fact that she made me so ashamed and disgusted with myself that i nearly fuckin relapsed and almost tried to hurt myself. i fucking hate this. i really fuckin do. i have to live with the constant guilt. the constant fuckin guilt. i thought i was smart and didnt think i could be taken advantage of. but i was wrong. so fucking wrong. i fucking hate myself so fucking much right now. i wish i didnt become friends with this fucking degenerate. i wish i didnt have to live with that constant empty feeling in my chest, that huge fucking weight on my shoulders, carrying the damage that theyve caused me. i feel empty right now. i feel so fucking shitty. i fucking. god. i cant do this anymore. my old work is just awful relics, constant painful reminders of the shit i did because of them. when i see my old work i see a horrible person. i see degeneracy. it legit shit feels like a stab in the heart when i remember why they exist. i wanna fucking dox them. i wanna fucking HURT THEM. i hate how much i played it off as "i was just cringe" but no this son of a bitch hurt me so fuckin bad. i hate this. i fuckin hate them. god i fucking hope she dies.

update i wanna be a fucking mari kinnie right now.

[mapleshmaple]

sso!!!!

[tiktaalic]

here’s why #caskillsjohn stans can still win.

1) dean Does Not Share anecdotes but SAM is both bitter but also moved past it enough in his journey to casually be like “hey yeah our dad used to leave us alone for weeks at the tender age of nine” as part of his friendship conversations with cas which I believe in my heart just. have to like happen sometimes right?? offscreen??

2) cas binge reads parenting books for jack and ties back all these dry recordings of development phases with jokes about dean changing sam’s diapers and is like. hm.

3) (biggest reason) he didn’t actually get to kill his OWN shitty dad so the motivation is like 75% love for sam and dean fueled rage 15% his own daddy issues 2% He Will Get a Good Grade in Problem-Solving From Dean 8% sam and rowena will think he’s cool

re; last ask all that being said though I kind of just want him to Get Fucking Wrecked by somebody though and rowena doing it as a reflection of her own issues with parenting? also works. my real vote is for ellen shooting him in the past

i still come down on cas going #nokilling for john. i think he recognizes that he would not want john to care for HIS child jack and that starts him drawing the connections between john and dean’s Whole Entire Fucking Deal but i dont think he thinks of john as like, a person. he’s just dean’s fucked up backstory. i think if ANYTHING he’d give dean sad gay european eyes about john and be like. i cant find the comic. the one thats like lap straddling hey youre weird wanna kiss. except it s hey you’re deeply traumatized by your father wnat to kiss. also cas wouldnt kill his own shitty dad either. sorry. i do think. even in s15. he would love some recognition and pride if not love from his father so IF there was a chuck confrontation it would be very cas going you didnt love me you didnt love any of us because you’re a horrific selfish man and a terrible father and i am better than you if only on the merit that my son loves me and feels loved by me . double also dean would NOT be able to cope with johm murder by any of his friends and family. john is dean’s beast that he agrees to put outside but he will NOT let someone put him down. rowena would do it tho .easy. and she wouldnt care that dean was mad about it. ellen woul d probably not go to the extreme of killing maiming but i could see her shooting him in the leg or sthing just because shes mad and hes there and she knows it wont kill em. bobby. however. would kill john in a HEARTBEAT bury him in the front yard. easy

[reineyday]

some feelings abt touya and bnha 302 in general! (long post)

jesus this whooooole chapter makes me so so so sad for touya, like he's canonically a crier and i just have all these images now of him crying off to the side while enji looks at his other kids and gives them the time of day. knowing that he was/is a frustrated crier makes the fact that dabi cant cry cuz of his burned tear ducts that much sadder ohhman

one of the things i cant get over is how touya was SO shunned by his dad that when he went to go tell enji about his fire turning from red to blue, he says "i might be as awesome as shouto sooner or later!" like?? this boy is 13 and shouto is 5 yet he's talking like the brother that's eight years younger than him is better than him and thar it's just a fact. the sky is blue, enji wants to beat all might one day, and shouto is better than the rest of his siblings. nevermind that he's only five and just wants to play with his siblings (and dont even mention to me how shouto says he wants to play with "touya and them" cuz im gonna fucking cry abt it. like even though touya's accepted he's bottom of the ladder in this family, shouto clearly wants some sort of acknowledgement from his older siblings and especially his older brother. IM FVCKN SOBBN). enji has made it clear in this family that shouto was what he was looking for and everyone else is not as important, and i knew this from shouto's pov but it's kinda wild to see it implied so casually in touya's words.

"you'll be glad you created me! i just know it!" HOLY SHIT. god my heart. oh my fuck. literally all enji had to do was show up to the fucking mountain, and he couldnt even do that? what the hell?? your son asks you to go to the mountain, you tell your wife not to let him go traim but she said she couldnt stop him, and instead of going yourself to make sure he's okay and BECAUSE HE ASKED YOU TO COME (and with an actually valid reason, no less! fire changing colour is kind of a big fucking deal!!!) you just?? let him go and let him stay there??? my god the amount of times touya must have burned himself and the trees with tears in his eyes. ahhhHHH!!!

what kills me (and touya too soon?) was that we thought before the back story started that enji forced touya to train till he burned up. then when 290 came out--and definitely after 301--we thought maybe touya overtrained himself and burned up. and sure, he was definitely overtraining, but to find out that the burns that "killed" him started just bc he was crying so much he lost control and didnt know how to ease up on his flames? he was upset and literally trying to get himself to stop crying, and then he just set himself aflame and burned up cuz of all his emotions??? that HURTS. holy fuck.

i cant believe natsuo's feeling lowkey guilty for not socking enji in the face like he wasnt EIGHT???? and let's be real, enji woukdnt have fucking listened to natsuo telling him to talk to touya--he already wasnt listening when touya would straight up say "look at me" and when even rei said touya just wanted enji to look at him and notice him. listen, i know sometimes miscommunications happen in families and children are embarrassed to admit they want attention and so their parents remain unaware that theyre not giving their kid something they want, but touya was as clear as can be on MANY occasions, and even rei agreed touya needed the attention and enji just wasnt listening.

also i know there was discourse abt touya being sexist by telling natsu that "the women in this house are good for nothing" and mb it was partly diff translations cuz i feel like saying "this house" makes it specific to rei and yumi instead of all women everywhere, but even disregarding that--i think it's a valid thought for him to have when rei wasnt standing up for him (where he could see, at least) and yumi admitted herself that she was too scared to interfere and so just tried to fix things and keep appearances. i feel like based on what touya's seen from them, it makes sense that he has that opinion. (also gonna mention that i think rei's and yumi's choices also make sense and i think they were valid, seeing as how they were afraid as well.)

and poor natsu being woken up in the middle of the night (what was implied to be often enough, esp cuz it seemed they share a room and their futons are close) bc of touya's pain. that's a lot of emotional responsibility for an eight year old, and it is also so sad that at 13, touya didnt have anyone else to turn to but his kid brother. at 13, i remember being fully aware of the distinction in maturity between an 8 year old and myself, and it sucks that touya couldnt go to anyone but a younger child with all his pain. i bet yumi being too scared to interfere translated to touya as "she wouldnt help me" and thats another reason he didnt go to the 2nd oldest when he needed to vent. (also not related to this but how the FUCK was natsuo so tall at 8 years old? wh a t)

this chapter. this fucking chapter. my heart aches for touya, and it's just such a huge fucking shame he didnt get the attention and validation and support he needed. there must have been workarounds so that touya could safely use his quirk. there weere DEFINITELY better ways to support your son through a self-destructive quirk, ways that involved actually being there and seeing him. i feel like if someone showed him the attention he needed and talked him through how to better control his emotions (and by extension, his flames) and a positive and healthy way, he could have been someone so great. and if he ever learned how to set aside the way he felt infefior to shouto and saw that shouto just wanted to play with his cool older siblings, it might have been really beneficial to see that there was someone there who thinks he's cool and gave him attention just bc he was an older brother, who needed him when everyone else in the househild didnt seem to need him.

and lastly, the fact that the chapter ends with rei saying that shouto is the family hero and that shouto will have to face dabi?? and it makes me angry that shouto has to take on that responsibility. that he was five and suffering for things he wasnt even a part of, couldnt be properly aware of, bc he was so young. he just saw that he was separated from his siblings and that his dad bullied his mom, then grew up shouldering enji's heavy goals and high expectations and abusive training alongside the barely-there memories of his older brother who died (i say barely there bc if natsu didnt even know shouto liked cold soba, shouto was definitely not around enough to have solid memories of touya before he "died"), and now he has to do the emotional labour of fighting his villain brother (who i bet shouto lowkey empathizes with when he thinks abt it late at night) as well as suffer the physical consequences of that agni kai. and it makes me angry that he has to do that, bc he's a Good Guy and he probably feels he has some sort of filial and familial responsibility. he's only 16. he just wanted to play with touya and them, and now he has to deal with this horse shit dabi's causing cuz his dad's an emotionally neglecting asshat who couldnt see past his dumb fucking ego until he saw shouto play with a bunch of kids during shou's remedial exam a decade after his eldest son burned himself to death. what the fuckety fuck.

lastly, since we saw touya burn uo the way he did... did he really just like... burn so much his jaw fell off, and that's how they found the jawbone? cuz holy hot (BURNING too soon???) damn that must have been painful as all hell. i wonder if next chapter we get to see if someone found touya at the park and helped him out and sorted out the jaw bone thing, or if we finally get to see if deku wakes up lol.

anyways this chapter hurt my heart big time, and i kinda wanna draw kid touya crying while being overlooked by his family to let out some of those feelings but we'll see.

and i still stand by my idealistic and naively optimistic hope that dabi gets redeemed and they soend some actually time together as a family (without enji. or at least, with an enji that has apologized to touya in seiza. like, forehead-to-floor apologize.)

does this hope sort out how dabi redeems himself, seeing as how he's murdered people in cold blood and shouldnt be excused for that bc those actions are also inarguably terrible? no. not sure how he could redeem himself for that kinda stuff honestly, but it doesnt mean i dont still somehow want the todoroki sibs to get along, cuz im weak for mending families.

also id like to send a huge kudos out into the world to rei todoroki for being firm for once and for also not running away from her mistakes like her asshole husband has been. i really admire and respect that. she was afraid and being abused, but now that she's been away from enji and has had time to heal, now that her and shouto are in the mend and she's seen that her eldest son is alive and a villain, she's a place where she can acknowledge that even though she was a victim too, she played a part in touya's emotional neglect and she's taking responsibility and that speaks to some incredible fucking strength. damn.

i hope one day that dabi realizes the same in regards to his mother and natsuo, who shouldered a lot of his emotional pain and suffered the consequences of his outbursts (even though his emotions are valid and his outbursts understandable, he still hurt rei and put a lot of pressure on natsu), and i also hope he sees that for all that he hates his father, his whole existence revolves around enji and it's a shitty place to be (and then he'll have ANGST abt it and that shit will be!! so good!!!)

yeah i think those were all my feelings. i had so many lol. their family situation is so difficult, i hope they all turn out okay and alive and healing.

oh i guess i also wanted to say that i kept calling enji an asshat and asshole cuz he was for sure, but i still think his redemption is valid and im glad he's taking those steps to be a better person by being a better father. i dont know if id want his family to forgive him for all that horrible shit he put them through (im personally hoping that no matter what anyone else does, natsuo will choose to to cooperate in the healing of his family as a unit but will never forgive enji) but i think it's good of people to try to be better than they were yesterday regardless of whether or not they get forgiveness. i dont personally like enji, but i dont hate that he's getting a redemption. i just hope it's a redemption that makes sense and forces him to put in the work, and isnt something like a death sacrifice for shouto or dabi. i want him to be alive and i want his redemption process to hurt like a fucking bitch while he forces himself to make better choices and be a better person, cuz redemption isnt supposed to be easy in the slightest. i GUESS all the crying he did in 302 was a good start.

anyways, if for some reason you read all the way down to the bottom--hello! and thanks for reading haha. cheers! :)))

[dirt-grub]

Dan and or chris for the headcannon thingy?

OKAY ONCE MORE FROM THE TOP CAUSE TUMBLR ATE THE LAST ONE

ahem.

Headcanon A: what I think realistically

Dan had a shit childhood and shit parents, and isn’t dealing with any of the issues spawned by that, hence why his life is kind of a disaster and his functionality as an independent adult is uh. subpar. 

Having grown up together and witnessed some of it secondhand, Chris knows not to bring it up too much with Dan. They both have an unspoken agreement and understanding not to approach certain topics with each other. They’re very good at reading each other, so Chris knows exactly how much he can actually get away with prodding Dan to act like a people for once, and vice versa Dan knows when to actually drop an argument when it gets into a serious place. Its incredibly weird for Elise to watch, and as incredibly close she is with Chris they have a very close bond that’s difficult for her to understand with how far back it goes. Also, in the beginning of Chris and Elise’s relationship, despite very vocally objecting to the entire thing when Chris was around, Dan begrudgingly gave Elise advice on how to speak Chris essentially, telling her what to avoid and what to talk about with him. He phrased it in a condescending way but we all know he was being a softie because he knows Elise makes Chris happy :,)

(also bonus every single roadtrip with all three of them ends up like this)

Headcanon B: what I think is fucking hilarious 

Dan is always visibly covered in cat hair. Trust me I’ve had a black and white cat before and you just can’t win. Whatever color you wear SOME of the fur will ALWAYS show up on it. You can always tell where Dan has been you just follow the trail

Chris’ gap/chip/whatever in his front teeth were the result of some dare. Based on a story from my childhood where we all dared a kid on my bus to lick the frozen bus window, and the bus jerked and he smashed his face on it and lost a tooth. Luckily irl it was a baby tooth but like that seems like a very Chris thing to happen even tho im sure its actually just genetic (also Brian if youre out there im sorry i laughed at you when you lost your tooth and im also sorry i stole your holographic staraptor pokemon card. id still have it if it wasnt for that miserable little troll bastard down the street who then stole it from ME a few years later. poetic justice i guess)

C: what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends

*cracks knuckles* i was born for this

Dan’s never slept a full night in his entire adult life, and has terrible nightmares constantly. His hypervigilance directly comes from his awful childhood, and Chris is his one single source of stability where most well adjusted people would have an entire complex system of friends and family to rely on. Chris is his ‘safe’ person -which I think is primarily an anxiety term but oh boy trust me is it a post traumatic thing also- The two have fundamentally different outlooks on the world and relationships, so theirs is pretty complicated, with Chris not actually realizing that despite the poor treatment, Dan has him on a pedestal in his mind that no one else has ever been privy to before. He has a damn shitty way of showing affection, but its revealed through his constant dependency on Chris and Chris alone that he holds him in incredibly high regards and would likely be devastated into complete nonfunctionality without him around. 

Chris has some self esteem issues with this and how it relates to his perceived importance in the lives of his loved ones. With Elise as well, he feels overshadowed by her talent and dependability, not realizing he’s the rock keeping both her and Dan grounded and relatively happy. Elise however is way better at communicating how much she loves Chris and genuinely both needs and wants him around. Also, I believe that Dan’s insane plots are some sort of an appeal to Chris in an outdated way- when they were younger they used to make those crazy plans together, as evidenced by the camp episode and mentioned a few times in passing (there was some line that stuck out to me in the gym ep along the lines of lets do it like old times, come up with a plan together) in Dan’s disconnected mind, he’s still in the past where Elise was never a participant in their lives and Chris and him were still immature and carefree, just the two of them against the world. In a misguided way, he thinks he’s inviting Chris to something fun and nostalgic every time he drags him along for something insane, not realizing in cases like the camp episode they were in the right and forced to fight back against something, and that stretching small grievances into huge meltdowns is an issue, the opposite of what would appeal to Chris now in his adulthood. Part of him is worried about him and that old bond being left behind if he doesn’t keep that very specific set of circumstances going. 

that got too long and psychoanalyzey lets move on HKDAUSL

D: would never work with canon but the canon is shit so I believe it anyway

TRANS TRANS TRANS T

this isnt as much a headcanon as an observation but dan has powerful new yorker energy (to me, the new yorker who never shuts up about new yorking). he just checks off a lot of the stereotypes and i wouldnt be surprised if the two of them had grown up around here instead of always living in cali like is canon. he checks all the boxes, rude, loud, opinionated, impatient, cant drive but complains about every other driver on the road, snobby in a weird despite living in a shithole apartment in a cesspool neighborhood, confrontational with complete strangers, colorful aggressive language, the whole thing. ive found personally that whenever im far enough out of state it is PAINFULLY obvious im from new york, given how im just naturally more aggressive in my speaking and mannerism completely unintentionally. Like, ive got a sailors mouth, i complain REAL hyperbolically, and until i noticed it it genuinley put people off who werent used to it HDUSALAS its just. the norm here. im not as angry as i sound lmfao i just talk real aggressive which is v dan

[planetjisungie]

misconceptions- l.jn

characters; gryffindor! jeno, slytherin! reader ft, gryffindor! mark

an; im making mark debut in every house, its what that man deserves 😔���🏻 also marks kinda a bitch in this but like we still love him. this is part 2 of the nct dream hogwarts series

jeno sat in the grand hall, watching you walk in alone. your hair was so silky, and you looked so delicate and soft. but that, apparently, was the complete opposite of who you were.

"bro i heard she like, hexed a bunch of first years and made them look stupid in the hallway. poor kids" mark uttered. the topic of conversation was conveniently you, and jeno was slightly confused about where this was all coming from. "and it’s definitely true?" he asked, turning to his blonde friend. mark shrugged. "its y/n, so i wouldnt put it past her. last year she got into a fist fight with kang miyoung"

mark was always gossiping, he knew all the rumours in the school, if you wanted to find anything out all you had to do was ask mark. he knew everything and it was sometimes scary. but it wasnt always true, like the time he spread the rumour that choi san had cheated on his girlfriend when it actually had turned out to be his sister. that was an awkward one. turning back to you, jeno tuned out the sound of mark droning on and on about the things you had apparently done. he watched you sit down away from the other slytherins, grab some pasta onto your plate before silently eating. he watched you drink your cup of water slowly, before going back to eating your food. he also saw how the other slytherins would glare at you, or point at you while laughing. something didnt add up. why would slytherins, known causing petty issues, mock someone who supposedly did just that? it really didnt make sense to him.

so the next day, jeno had heard crying down the hallways. being a gryffindor, he ran towards the sound, wand in hand in case anyone was in danger. what he wasn’t prepared to see, however, was a first year on the ground, holding his ankle while crying in pain. but that in itself wasnt shocking, what was, was you sat next to him, a gentle smile on your face while your wand had a green glow to it, seeingly calming the boy down. he had then noticed that you were using a pretty advanced healing spell, which was odd for a slytherin to know in the first place, especially someone like you. in fear of being caught staring, jeno just swiftly turned around, brows furrowed from the thoughts in his brain.

the next time jeno had seen you, he was playing hide and seek with the gryffindor boys in the forest. he was hiding behind a fallen tree, when he noticed a familiar head of hair, and the black and green robe flowing around you. getting up, he silently walked closer towards you, trying to see what you were doing. seeing a creature next to you, he squinted his eyes. you were knelt next to a unicorn, a large gash on its right side, your wand with the same green glow as when you were healing the first year. you seemed to be at peace here, just helping out. not noticing the small smile on his face, jeno turned and walked away before again, you could notice him.

the third time he had seen you, was not as pleasant as the last two. you were sat on the floor of an empty hallway, a white cat in your lap as silent tears fell down your face. jeno felt his heart break for you, he could practically feel the emotional pain radiating off of you. deciding to actually talk to you, jeno made his presence known, walking closer before sliding down the opposite wall to face you. looking up, your eyes widened noticing the infamous gryffindor heartthrob, the crush of all the younger girls. clearing your throat, you wiped your eyes of the tears, pulling your cat, mr snuggles (the return of mr snuggles) closer to you unknowingly. jeno flashed you a small smile, which you returned. clearing his throat, he moved his gaze from the oddly adorable sight of you cuddled up to a cat to the cold wooden floor. "im jeno" he introduced, causing you to scoff lightly. "im y/n, but you probably already know that" you said softly. surprised to actually hear your voice, it wasnt at all what jeno was expecting, causing his head to whip towards yours. he was expecting an arrogant, cold, high pitched bitchy voice, but was met with a quiet, gentle and melodic voice. by now he was almost certain that you had definitely been misunderstood.

"uh- okay wow i wasn’t expecting-" jenos rambling was cut off with your soft laughter, watching your head lean against the wall slightly and your eyes close, shoulders moving up and down in response to the sound coming from your chest. "i know i know, you were expecting me to be some cold, brutal and violent bitch, right?" you said, a smile now on your face which was a nice contrast to your earlier face of sadness and utter despair. "i mean kind of i guess" jeno shrugged and chuckled awkwardly. you let out a sigh before extending your legs from the crossed position, letting them stretch in front of you. "its fine, everyone just blindly believes any rumours that are spread. youre not at fault, the slytherins are" jeno looked up in confusion after you said this, evidently showing on his face, adding onto that the noise he lets out which couldnt be described other than ‘a jeno noise’. noticing his obvious inquiry, you layed back and closed your eyes.

"i dont exactly fit in with the slytherins. my focus has always been to help others, to share what i have to those who dont. the slytherins obviously didnt like that, and i quickly became a misfit, so they started spreading awful rumours about me. no one usually bothers to check if they’re true or not, so that resulted in me not having any friends" you sigh after explaining practically the whole reason of your mental torture at hogwarts to the gryffindor across from you. jeno once again felt his heart break, and a small pout formed on his lips. "how comes you were put in slytherin then?" he asked. you groaned and opened your eyes. "stupid slytherin parents. i didnt get sorted, they work for the ministry so i was basically forced into slytherin to carry on shitty family tradition bullshit" you snorted, head lolling onto your right shoulder. jenos eyebrows raised. so you were basically not a slytherin yet put in slytherin and people practically bullied you for it. sounds pretty tough to him. "and you couldnt speak to dumbledore about it? im sure hed do something" he said, now genuinely concerned about you. shrugging, you reopened your eyes. "i dont realy care anymore, let the people think what they want"

after that day, jeno watched you a lot more closely. he would see how your nose scrunched up when you saw something you didnt like, or when your tongue poked out when you were focused. he sat across the room from you in potions, so when slughorn announced that you two were going to be partners for the Amortentia potion, he couldnt exactly say he was disappointed. despite the obviously sympathetic looks from people around him, he smiled as you pulled the chair next to him, sitting down carefully.

the lesson began, and you and jeno quickly started working on making the potion, working together efficiently and getting it done to the T whilst also having a little bit of fun. leaning towards the pot, jeno moved at the same time as you to smell what was supposed to be the scent of your crush. immediately catching a strong whiff of jenos apparently overpowering cologne, you leaned back, coughing and covering your nose. "jeno, stop wearing so much cologne" you choked out, trying to inhale fresh air. meanwhile, jeno smelt the scent of lavender and cotton, turning to you in disgust, not at the smell itself but the pure strength of it. "unlike you, i dont douse my clothes in lavender essential oil, jesus christ woman" he lifted his hand whilst staring into the pinkish liquid. "i dont think we did this right" you said, before slughorn came up to you with a delighted look on his face. "oh well done, this is perfect!"

that day lead to a lot of confusion between you and jeno. opting not to ask him about it seeing as he never questioned you, you just sat in silence out on the grass, staring up at the stars. you had snuck out of the castle to sit on the land around it, seeking some sort of relaxation. what you hadn’t expected, was for the black haired boy to somehow find you, sitting down quietly on the grass next to you. "so..." he started, before sighing and looking down. he knew he liked you, how could he not? the way you were completely different to how you were said to be, how you didnt blame others but the slytherins for being mean towards you, and just how kind you were in general. whilst most people would veer away from you, he was the complete opposite, finding himself attracted to you like a magnet. smiling slightly, you turned to face him. just like him, you had found it hard not to fall for him. in the times where people would doubt you, or just be plain rude, he actually came and spoke to you. jeno was the first one who cared about you, and not just the rumours that drifted around, he talked to you when no one else would.

that night, you two had a whole sobbing session, confessing to eachother and apologising for things you didnt even need to apologise for. needless to say, when you walked into the hall hand in hand the next morning, with grins that hurt your cheeks, it definitely put people in a daze.

[im-the-punk-who]

Now, we don’t have time to unpack all of that 

i’m seriously...so tired of being alone lmao. and i know everyone is - we’re all alone right now. but my alone-ness started before the pandemic - in fact i was just starting to be ready to climb out of it when this whole thing hit, and i’ve been stuck in a place i’m ready to move on from with no real way to do so. 

Steve got all the friends in the breakup. all but maybe four friends have either stopped talking to me completely, or only in that vague facebook way when i ask directly for help. I’ve lost probably 90% of the personal connections I made during the last five years. And I can’t make any new ones, not only because of the pandemic, but because i’m terrified of...what will happen when I inevitably fail again. I know i’m not good at making and keeping friends. It wasn’t ever something i was taught how to do, seeing as i never stayed in one place long enough to have them when i was growing up. i learned to be alone, and depend on myself. i learned that trusting other people was how you got hurt, and ostracized, and hurt, and hurt. 

and i really have tried? i have tried and tried and tried to tell people this, to make them understand that to be my friend means to accept this, to TELL me when i’m not being a good friend, or when i’m going too long talking to them. when they feel ignored. when i do something insensitive. 

and yet all i get is ‘oh no i would never do that to you, i’ll never leave you, well I love you and i understand and i think youre great.’

and it’s. god it’s so disheartening because then when i DO inevitably fuck up, push things to far because i get hyperfixated and nothing else matters- not even the boundaries of the people i care about - i’m the bad guy. i’ the one who didnt listen. im the one who didnt care. i’m the one who left, who was too insensitive.

and i’m not saying i am not or wasnt those things. i was. but i try - god i always fucking TRY to explain at the outset that i am like this because i have no frame of reference to be anything else. that i am trying but i need HELP. i dont need understanding, and while compassion is nice and love is great, what i need sometimes is a slap over the head.

and yet every time i get this. ‘i’ll never leave you’ - at this point i’m so conditioned to losing people that say this, I accept that at the point someone says that to me, the relationship is over. 

Steve said that to me six months into when we were dating. I knew the night we got together we weren’t going to work. but for three years i hung onto the hope that if i tried hard enough to change myself, that if i hung on that the kinks would iron out. i was fucking stupid. i was really, really fucking stupid. i wish i had been more honest, and open, and i wish i hadn’t tried so hard to insist that it was just trauma, or immaturity, or that we would grow into being able to cooexist.

The sun peeks over the horizon in a futile attempt to catch a glimpse of the night sky that is now retreating in its presence, for no two things so entirely opposite could ever coexist in the same place at the same time.

I wonder how that escaped our notice for so long.

i’m obsessed with trying to grow and fix and heal and try. i fail, but i am always trying. steve excels at accepting themselves for who they are. their flaws are their flaws and they are okay with that. 

like i said. this wasn’t news to me in 2016, and it sure as hell wasn’t news in 2019. 

i am feeling abandoned and hopeless and now, without a way forward since any funds and all the work i put into myself over the past 8 years - believing if i was successful enough and i could at least hold up my financial stability as proof that i was different (from my siblings, since my parents always said the reason they would never loan me money was because my siblings were all deadbeats who had never paid them back a dime) - believing that if I at least had that, i could accept that personally i was a failure. that it wouldn’t be a failure if i had something to balance the scales. i am dreading the emotional response when my credit score - which was finally consistently in the high 700s and low 800s, plummets to 680 because i have maxed out every source of money i have trying to stay alive and keep my pets alive, with vet bills and a roof over out heads. it seems small and inconsequential and it shouldn’t matter so much. but it does. that number represents years of sacrifice. that number represents the fact that i was getting somewhere. that i had value i could measure(which may seem unhelpful, but it was. it was beyond helpful for my self esteem and confidence to know i had assets i could use to help myself and those i cared about.)

and now i’ve lost both and i know the mountain is not unclimbable and i know the path i have to take and i know i can make it. but it also means i know the rocks i will stumble on, i know the caves that smell like death i will have to shelter in. i know the cold and damp i will endure. i know how many times i will stumble and fall and bleed and cry and scar. i’m fucking tired, and i’m alone, and knowing it gets better doesn’t make it any easier. knowing how to make it better doesn’t make it any quicker or less painful. and there is still that pesky thing called personal relationships that i will once again have to put aside to stabilize my financial life. again. 

i am bitter. i am trying not to be. but i am. i’m so fucking bitter that i am never going to get an apology, or even an acknowledgment of the fact that the hurt went both ways. that i am going to be the bad guy to people who said (not just steve) that they would love me and would understand and would support me. that i did not even warrant an explanation to their disappearance, as if my sins themselves were explanation enough. as if i know what i did and am the only one at fault. i still see pictures of steve alongside the people i still think of as my friends and they look happy and like they are at least not alone, and i have not heard from anyone since before the start of this year. 

no matter what i do it always leads to the same outcome.

I am so goddamn fucking tired. i am trying not to panic. i am trying so hard to be conscious of the patterns i will fall into. of the patterns i fell back into with steve. i am writing everything down in the hopes that if i survive this i will be able to track myself better. to be more aware of myself. 

sorry means nothing if you don’t change your behavior. 

sorry isnt what i want. it’s never what i want. i want to see that no one will go through what you put me through. what we put ourselves through. 

i am feeling very alone, and i wish i had something to hold onto, someone i could talk to who would understand. but they’re all gone. i dont want to open up to anyone anymore. 

and i know this wouldnt be as bad if i could make some new friends, if i was working, if i had something i could do to throw my focus into. i’ve always been great at distraction.

anyway my plan is to get super drunk on shitty beer in the true fashion of my alcoholic family lineage because i’ve given up on healthy coping mechanisms. those didn’t work, so at least these ones feel better. 

[livelovemusic0996]

This is not my typical post. I usually don't do this but I am literally disgusted but some people on this site.

Don't get me wrong I am not on a specific side of Bluelives matter or blacklives matter. Both sides have done wrong. Both sides have their good and bad. But to say law-enforcment lives don't matter wtf are you people saying. Cops risk their lives Every day to do one of the hardest jobs out there. First responders have it rough and hardly get any pay for it. I know there's bad. I know, but they aren't ALL bad.

It's easy to see all the bad cops out there. It's easy to see the bad situations and brutality that come from the select few officers who are shitty people and a disgrace to the badge. That's all they play on the news. It's all we see in media. We've got the homophobes. The natzi. The macho power hungry pricks. The men who harass black people for looking suspicious the trigger happy fools who shot to soon or to fast. I get it. However those select few are not the rule they are the exception.

They don't show the officers picking up children from the trunk of a car who got kidnapped. They don't show a mother sobbing over the killer of their child finally being arrested while the officer hugs her. They don't show an officer stepping in to break up a beating on the street or helping find the old man with alztimers who wandered outside while his very concerned loving daughter or son made dinner.

They don't show a shoot out over a simple traffic stop or the hate spewed in the faces of so many officers who never once did anything to anyone just simply wore the uniform. They don't show a gun being pulled by all races or the white cops pleading for the black man to put the weapon down that they dont want to shoot. (Which has happened don't believe me go on YouTube and watch bodycam footage.)

They don't show after a shooting the cops who just had a loaded gun pointed at their face running to apply gauze packs and quick clot to the gunshot wounds until ems arrives. They don't show the white cop saving the pregnant black woman who's husband was working and a man broke in her house and held her hostage. They don't show the cops looking through snow rain and storms for the little boys and girls who went missing from their homes. They don't show them rushing to the scene where three young children are holed up inside their bathroom and the child is begging officers to get there to help because their daddy came home drunk and is trying to kill mommy. They don't show them rushing to a scene to help someone when just earlier they had let loose a nasty string of hate at them for previously doing there jobs.

They don't show the emotional break downs when you loose a partner or close freind on the force or find the body of a child you searched weeks for. They don't show the nightmares and therapy sessions over finding broken mangled bodies of men women and worst of all children. They dont show the backlash and hate you get for having to shoot the "innocent" black, white, Hispanic, Asian man who previously held up a gas station, shot the worker and wouldnt drop their weapon. They don't show broken battered bodies of officers after a riled up mob, drugged individual or someone three times their size gets a hold of them.

They don't show the multiple different cops all of different race, sexual orientation, and faith standing side by side doing the job right.

No sir. The media is all about showing every cop who did it wrong. They are all about division and past mistakes. Brutality toward color, queer, low income families. Thats all theu show. Dont get me wrong it happens. We know. It's a disgrace our brothers and sisters act that way. Disgusting. And sometime it is covered up. Disgraceful. Totally understandable to why there is hate toward those selected ones.

The truth is there are bad cops. They are asshole racist homophobic peice of shits who don't deserve the badge. They need to be snuffed out and extingushed but only from the job. They are out there we all know it however they don't deserve to die for it. Their partners or fellow cops shouldn't be blamed for it either.

And I can guarantee this no one is willing to see it this way right here: Not every black man or mexican on the street is a gang banger correct? Not every Christian is a judgmental asshole. Not every Muslim/Arab is a terrorist. Not every person who doesn't support LGBT is a homophobe. Not every person who owns a gun will be a murderer. Not all kids on the street become drug dealers. Not all black boys in low poverty areas with no daddy around will turn to gangs. Not all stereotypes are real. There are plenty of people who are a exception to the bad stereotypes out there and cops are no different.

They have families who love them. They have children they tuck in at night and read stories to. They have husbands and wives who pray to whatever higher power you believe in they return home safe. They have fears and favorite foods and shows and movies. They have backyard barbeques and birthday partys and hobbies. They have parents who begged them to make a safer career choice while they told them if they are gonna go out of this world then atleaste it's protecting people.

They freinds who worry everytime there's a report over the radio who will come home tonight. They have brothers and sisters on the force who just like them are good and kind and want to nake a difference not be there for a power trip and gun. They went through extensive training being tazed tear gassed and hardass testing to get where they are.

They are black, white, Hispanic ,Asian multirace, Christians, Catholic, Muslim, Jewish, atheist, Gay, Straight, Bisexual. They love movies and shows and junk food. They love vacations and their kids school plays. They love holidays and their families. They are human too and instead of hate and horrible stereotyping teach your children everyone on this earth is human. They deserve respect. They deserve love. They deserve appreciation. We all do. Every single life on this earth matters. Stand up against cops who do their jobs wrong. Stand up for stricter laws and regulations for cops who are on the bad end. They are out there I won't deny that. But Stand up for what's right. Do your research before accusing a cop on the street. Look up body cam footage. Don't look at cell phone videos who dont show the whole thing. Don't harass the officers who have done nothing but serve and protect like the oath requires. Don't make art of slitting cops throats and burning poliece cruisers. Don't spread the hate further. Be the exception. Stand for what's right. Maybe if everyone was more concerned with that than the hate things would be a hell of a lot better.

[fisherfurbearer]

fuck sam walmarts

and fuck management

I’ve had it. Left the store in tears tonight.

as some peoople probably/hopefully know. walmart closes at 6 pm on christmas eve. no one actually gets to leave at 6 becuase of shitty last minute customers. but it is what it is.

this. is really personal but im honestly SO close to just. killing myself? so who cares

basically. had a really really bad last few days. spent a lovely time with family (jessies family, his oma and opa and sister and parents and it was just a great time. theyre more family to me than most of my blood family) but it did make me Sad in Deep ways as we dont know if this is going to be our last christmas with his oma who isnt doing so good. and it just twisted me up a little but was othewrsiwse a great day. but then sunday i just...had a huge breakdown in the morning and decided to use my accomodation (i get 2 excused absenses a month) to cool down and gte myself together. slept a lot. woke up adn got a lot done, felt great, then i CRASHED really really bad, got really angry, lashed otu, took like...8-10 sleeping pills...theyre horrific things and im never doing that again...had to sleep for two days after that...felt horrifically sick, in pain, just awful. had repeating nightmares over and over. which has also been wearing me down recently. wasnt able to work monday either because i still couldnt stand and between the pills and the depression/anxiety and really just. felt like the world was ending.

decided sometime last night id just...try my best to make it in today, work my shift (really long 9-6, knowing i wouldnt leave on time nad htisis my first time working in 5 days now...which is rough...) and if i can get through this, i have another couple days off in a row after that (schedules fault, not mine...do feel awful i missed 3 days before that though...) and we can just. get back on track

today i DID go to work, jessie drove me in

i worked. a long time. im supposed to get a break every 2 hours and a 1 hour lunch

i gott my first break on timeish.

then i got my lunch 6 hours after i got in. at which time i got “locked out” for not taking my lunch and coudlnt do anything on the registers. i was supposed to get it 4 hours in. its christmas eve and excruciating and im still in pain and tired from my previous days breakdowns, but otherwise?? i did really good. i didnt mind at all that my lunch was so late. i was a little miffed, but its ok. i dont care, so long as i get it eventually. anyway they FINALLY noticed i was locked out and got me coverage and i ended my lunch at 4. things continued ok. worked on self checkout, met a lot of regulars i really like, prevented $200 of theft (HAHA WOW that was really really funny i love preventing petty theft. i prevent so much theft every week its my pride and joy) just did okay. then they had us close self checkout that took a little while. then at 5:00-5:10 or so i went to my Manager/Supervisor/”““People LEad” as walmart is now trying to call them, lets call her manager Y, and i told her i still need my break and will i get it before i leave. she said go to register 4. i asked again hey will i get my break though and she said yeah and i thought to mysel HAHA thats not going to happen but ok

really stupid that after bieng locked out the first time she couldnt give me my break before i openned a register with a line i cant get rid of

anywayy i did ok otherwise for a while

but at 5:25 or so i reminded a CSM “hey i need my break still can i get that?” and she just ssaid yeah well try to get someone and then more time passed so much time. i put through an ask on the register “assistance needed”. waited another 10 minutes. “assistance needed” again. starting to get anxious. its past 5:40. the line is so long. theres so MUCH NOISE. Its SO LOUD. the intercom keeps going off, no one is responding to me, i dont have a mat to stand on so my knees HURT,, im not doing okk

i switch my light to flashing/need assistance and start looking for someone to ask for help. its 5:45, i need my break NOW, i DESERVE IT for workng this long ass shift and they already missed several of my last breaks a week ago AND got me locked out today and im STARTING TO GET ANXIOUS PELASE I JUST WANT MY BREAK SO BAD

nnthgen a csm is passing by im about to lose it, so i tell her CSM J, please i really need my break now PLEASE and im starting to ccry and i try to tell her whats going on but she shushes me and goes and gets sometone

im full on tears at this point, im so strreesed out,,

manager Y and some other snooty manager come over andd. ffkcing. ask me whats wrong. im crying and i try to explain im really really stressed out, i havent had my last break, ive been trying to get someone for so long now, i just really need to leave im so sorry

and theyy just. fckkng

ffcking manager Y jjst ssays ok “ill give you your break” and “this is your last break” and i ssaid?? yeah i knoww?? andd she saidd “next time youre like this, just dont come in”

i quote that completeltyyy....i really lost it then...i cried som muchh

this isnt the first itme she said something like this to meee...

she asked me “why are you CRYING” When i had an anxiety attacki n the store once, when ic cloked in and couldnt get myself together,, she didnt give me time to calm down, she didnt listen as to why, she just said “why are you crying. this is a BUSINESS. you cant be CRYING Here.” and i just said ok ill go home bye and leftt

andd when i tried to get my availability changed from 7-9 to 7-6/7-7 because the random late shifts with 7 am shifts was messing me up really really bad and my doctor thinks i need to hcange it too, she just said “i cant do that. thisi sa BUSINESS.” and she wouldnt listen when i said i might have to quit because of this, this is for my health, im literally scheduled 7-2 every sunday in december, busiest day of the busiest month and you cant even chop TWO HOURS off my weekend availability????

andd i jjst

ive HAD IT with her

ive had ittt

im so ashamed and angry and anxious and i still havent stopped cryingg. she called me over to her again as i was leaving and she blamed me for it. she ssaid a customer was upset that i “Screamed” (ues i raised my voice a little but i wasnt screaming??? also the two customers i was attending to when this was going on and i cried were VERY KIND nad jjst said i was doing a good job and thanked me for being there) and called a manager over (but...csm J got them?? not a customer...??) and i cant be acitng like this, i cant do customer service when im stressed,, and d i should just STAY HOME If im going to be like that

then shee fufkcing toold me i DID IT WRONG, that i “shouldve called someone over” I TOLD HER I DID!!!!! I DID!!!!!!!!!! YOU NAIL INTO MY HEAD IM NOT ALLOWED TO LEAVE THE REGISTER SO I DIDNT, I DID EVERYTHING ELSE I COULD THOUGH!!! I REQUESTED HELP TWICE!! I TURNED MY LIGHT TO FLASHING!!! I TRIED TO CATCH A MANAGER WALKING BY TO HELP ME!!! N OONE LISTENED UNTIL IT WAS TOO LATE, I DID EVERYHTING I COULD!! yet she seriously told me to my face that “you didnt call anyone”, “you couldve turned your light to flashing” WHICH I DID and sshee jjst said that i made customers uncomfortable and i cant work like thatt and just stay hhome

ii stayed home sunday because i was having a mjor mental emergencyy.

i came in today because i was feeling better and i took it eaasy and ended up doing a wonderful job and mad eso many people smilea nd fixed so many problems that wouldve otherwise upset a lot of folks and i met my regulars and made old folks smile andd i prevented a lot of theft that no one else wouldve caughtt and i jjstt broke down after 9 hours and not getting a last break and all the chaos of register (WHICH BY THE WAY THEY KNOW I DONT LIKE REGISTER!!! I THRIVE ON SLE FCHECOUT!!! THATS MY JOB TITLE!! THATS WHAT I DO!!!! THEY KNOW THISS!!!!) and HER AVOIDING GIVING ME MY FUCKING BREAK and NOT RESPECTING MY FFUCKING METNAL DISABILITIES LJNASDKAJHDBASJSDNAJSNDKANSD

I JJST DONT KNOW WHAT TO DOO

i really want to die and i really want to never go back but i really loved my job i loved helpting people ii jjst hate her so muchhh and i feel GENUINE DREAD/SEVERE ANXIETY jjst SEEING her nnow

she doesnt CARE about anyone but herself shes a horrible peson i cant tell the store manager though cause she wont care either and manager Y has more clout than me so shell just twist my words and make me out as the bad guy as hte “CRAZY ONE” who cries and gets stressed (FOR COMPLETELY VALID REASONS AFTER BEING PUSHED OVER THE EDGE) even tthough i work SO FFRIKCING HARD and do SUCH A GOOD JOB and asdjanjsdhajshdas

i d ont know what to doo

i cant work another job because no where else pays as much or will let me do self checkout only, because being a cashier stresses me so muchh

ii...really wanntted to grow stuff and make preserves and sell bee products and work with folks raising heritage sheep and make more fiber art andd open a little stall at a local market and sell all that,, and offer more online and do customs andd stuff

i know i could mkae money that wa ybut i ccantt start it so sudenly and im too Broken to do it seriouslyy and i dont even want to HAVE to quit because of ONE PERSON But shes done this so many times now and this is the nfinfal streaww

i jjst dont know what to doo...

i cantt stop cryingg

i cant even enjoy christmas nnow. wanted to see my stepdad and give him his presernt and maybe be ok.

last christmas we had to move because our house was condemned after a fire. now im going to have to lose my job because of a horrible manager who doenst respect my metnal health or anything about me reallyy. and unfortunately im such a failure that i cant. do anything else and if i lose this job ill lse my animla sand i wotnt be able to do anyhtingg andd im jjust fucking trash

goddammit i dont know what to do. i really dont. hhahaaa. i just really want to end it. ive come so far and none of it fucking matters because of thiss fucking horrible manager.

[strawberryspeachy]

I have so many time periods in my life that were fucking miserable (my whole life so lol) but most of them im like

Man. I wish i could go back with the knowledge i have now and change shit

But my senior year of college still takes the cake. I would not repeat that fucking year given the chance. I legit for real am npt exaggerating at all when i say I HAVE NO IDEA HOW I GRADUATED. What strength i had. How did i do it??

I lost all of my friends. I lived with girls who made me feel worse about myself. My classes were super difficult and busy. My mom had finally admitted to me that she knew she was forgetting things.

I BECAME bulimic. That wasnt something i did before that year. Bulimic to the point where if i ate more than one peice or bread i felt guilty. Sometimes i coild rationalize to myself that i ate a healthy and appropriate meal but after 20 minutes id start panicking. That i HAD TO go throw it up. I HAD TO. if i didnt id regret it so i hadddd toooo

I didnt eat some days

And it went beyond the point of. All i have is my skinny body. It went to i hate myself and my life and i deserve to suffer. I dont deserve food. If i keep doing this maybe my body will fuck up enough that i die.

And speaking of death. It was the first time i fully tried to kill myself. I played with the idea before. Id do risky things on the off chance that id die doing it. Sometimes risky enough that i was surprised i even did it and got really scared afterwards thinking about ever doing them again. But id never made a plan. Got materials. And tried and fell asleep thinking id really never wake up. And i did it a couple times. And honestly i think i killed a part of me that year.

I cried all the time. I was just a zombie with a painted smile on my face so i could get help in class from other people. But i never actually smiled. And the second i walked in my room id start crying. All that bottled up energy released. And there was too much.

I used to fall out of my chair cause i was crying so much and id just roll around on the floor and then yell at myself to get my ass back in the chair and to keep studying. And i did. And id keep crying. And i kept studying.

And i took adderal several times a week. It wasnt even working. But it had a crack effect on me and would make me really happy and optimistic for no reason

I dont remember ever feeling confident in my studys. I walked into every exam terrifyed.

I was scared the entire year that i was gonna fail.

I was so out of it that i didnt even notice the stress permanently altered my apperance. Eveyone said i grew up. No the stress aged me. I didnt notice my hair fell out or how my chin seemed to grow. Or how my skin greyed

Theres no way to make thay year better. That was an awful year.

I have no point in this.

Just like that year and the two following it... which... issss 2014-2015-2016 to 2017

Like id completed three years of college. I had to graduate. I couldnt get out of that with a clear mind. And then coming home. None of my friends lived at home. I couldnt find a job. I took what i could get. I couldnt leave home. I had to stay for my mom. I had to and i wanted to.

Im thinking about it cause i could have immediately came to japan out of college. And i knew it then. I chose not to. I wanted to go home and be with my mom. And my family made that a nightmare. And watching her and taking care of her while she went downhill... i dont think ill be able to face those feelings... for many years to come. (I mean hopefilly not if i died while writing this id be happy) but theres really no getting around the fact that having completed my finance degree in college. My only choice was to end up as a server

My 13 year old dog died. My 18 year old cat died. My mom was shitting all over the house and refusing to sleep or eat. The woman who i hated so much that i went to work early and smiled while offering to stay later because “at least im not at home” finally died.

One day she told me she was gonna kick me out of the house (for the zillionth time) she screamed and yelled at me. And i went to work. And i came home and she was standing outside of the front door. I thought about continuing to drive and coming back later when shed moved. But for whatever reason i stopped and got out still hoping shed be gone by the time i walked up. She wasnt. She didnt even notice i was there. I was tempted to walk past her and go in. But i didnt. I asked her what was wrong. She said she could take the step to the sidewalk. And i helped her. And she rambled to me about how she thought shed be stuck there all night and how she didnt know what was wrong. The last time i saw her she had been screaming at me about how im a worthless spoiled lazy rude mean old adult acting like a baby. So. I really didnt have much sympathy to give her. I couldnt even talk. I was still mad. She thanked me. I said she was welcome. Thats all i remember. That was about 3 months before she died. If i went back to that exact moment knowing that information. I honestly dont think id change anything... she was.... so mean... so needlessly mean... im still mad about every time i was mad at her

Unlike my mom. Who i dreamed about this week. I had a dream that i was home just living my regular life in high school. And i did something. And my mom was yelling at me. And we got into an argument. Just one of those nonsense arguments that dont mean much. And in my dream i was like ugh my moms so annoying. And i woke up. And i miss her so much. What i wouldnt do to listen to my mom yell at me about something like taking too long to get ready. Or putting something in the wrong place. Or forgetting to do some chore she asked me to do. My mom with her fully functioning brain yelling at me because ive inconvenienced some plan that she has made for hersef that day. Thats shes fully capable of doing herself. And will do no matter what anyone says cause you dont mess with her schedule - you work with it.

I actually woke up and smiled. When you grow up do you ever think youll think about your parent full blown going off on you about something kinda dumb would ever make you smile...

Anyhow... that boy at work i like. I tried to be cute. He said he texts his friends back when he wants to when i pestered him about having not responded to my mesage. I was like

Oh thats the second time youve called me your friend! :) were friends :D

I just wanted a chuckle and for him to say yea yea were friends

But instead.... he said no. Were coworkers.

And i said you can be friends with your coworkers

Which led to a super long.... turned into argument...

Where he told me no. He doesnt need more friends. He only talks to me because he has to. He doesnt like me. He doesnt want to talk to me. He doesnt like when he has to talk to me. He has plenty of time to hang out with friends but not me cause im not his friend and he does not want to hang out with me. Dont ask him questions. Dont talk to him for more than a minute. He only said yes to hanging out with me because i was new to the country. His girlfriend didnt want him to and he decided he didnt want to after thinking about it. He wont change his mind. And he got really mad while telling me that his dumbass gf gets mad when i text him. And that he doesnt wanna talk to me out of work and at work only about work nothing else.

Most of that was unprovoked information. Like.. a quarter of it came from my “so were friends?” Remark. Another quarter of it came from my “coworkers can become friends” remark. And given half of it.... i brought up that he liked talking to me enough that he said he wanted to hang out with me - so you fan guess what quarter of the information came from that... oh sorry did i say quarters. I guess i meant thirds.

Extra shitty cause its a big jump from the boy who was engaging in actual conversation with me yesterday and moved so close to me that he was cms away from resting his head on me shoulder. Many times. Actually over the past couple days.

[koganelovesmcclain]

I texted her and said that I was sorry I missed her call and I think she is mad at me?

Edit ;;; for some reason the tags fucked up idk why

I missed a call from my granny because my dad was nearby. My parents hate her apparently (?) and I didn’t want him to yell at me.

She was probably calling me to sing happy birthday to me, like she has every year since I was born.

[comicteaparty]

June 3rd-June 9th, 2019 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from June 3rd, 2019 to June 9th, 2019.  The chat focused on Galebound by Respheal.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Week Long Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Galebound by Respheal~! (http://www.galebound.com/)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Remember, though, that while we allow constructive criticism, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic. Below you will find four questions to get you started on the discussion. However, a new question will be posted and pinned everyday (between 12:01AM and 6AM PDT), so keep checking back for more! You have until June 9th to tell us all your wonderful thoughts! With that established, let’s get going on the reading and the chatting!

QUESTION 1. What has been your favorite scene in the comic so far? What specifically did you like about it?

QUESTION 2. Why and how do you think Conan has some of his own memories sealed? What did Altiria see that caused them such distress? How does this factor in to why Altiria thinks Din’s plans won’t pan out?

Respheal

In Altiria and Conan's defense, Din's plans fall to pieces if a butterfly crosses his path unexpectedly

RebelVampire

I accept the canon that Din can be tripped by butterflies

RebelVampire

I also accept a canon where Din starts yelling at the butterfly that it's 5 seconds too early and totally off schedule

Respheal

Yes

RebelVampire

Crack theory for #2: Conan was Felix all along. He doesn't know cause of the memories being sealed. and as Din befriends Conan, he will be torn between killing the friend hed come to love and the enemy he hates most in the world.

MJ Massey

Maybe the real Felix was inside us all along

RebelVampire

sorry Din, you've got felix germs inside you

1) the scene where Pascal shows up on the bridge to fight them. The look on everyone's faces is too priceless. And then everyone gets to have a nice chat and we get to see Pascal is just a great boy whose murder pants were a little too tight. 2) The memories are probably sealed for his own protection by someone who loves him. Cause why would anybody want to have to remember Felix? Altiria probably saw that Conan was the one true nobleman who was set to conquer them all. And that Din can't backstab conan so easily because of that.

Kabocha

MY FAVORITE SCENE! Is that one where Conan drowns after Alty tries to take him as a bri--- Wait that wasn't canon? Dammit, Conan! Realistically, though, I think it's currently the one here, starting at the end of Page 151: http://www.galebound.com/comics/2783990/151/ There's just.... a lot of weight. Pascal wakes up, and instead of really freaking out about nearly dying, he comforts his brother. You can learn a lot about Din and Pascal's relationship from these panels alone, and it's... something. (To me, it reads as Pascal being the one who buries a lot of his emotions - he never got a chance to really expect much out of life as a magician, before Din did what he did...)

Kabocha

Why does Conan have memories sealed... For... plot... reasons. You know, maybe Alty saw Conan's parents doing something. Maybe his parents are old enough to have been involved in the War of the Blind Kings--- What's that you say? No? :'D But on a serious note, one must wonder if Conan did something that necessitated his memories being sealed. A birth secret, perhaps? Maybe Conan's actually a part of the Gale that someone stole and put in a human body to learn the suffering of those under the system, to help give agency and consciousness to the arbiter of the Obligation. ...Hm. (Because right now, the Gale just... exists.) Alty, being a daemon, wouldn't like this naturally, right? If Conan's part of the Gale, she has a vested interest in making sure he returns to the cycle as he is. Anyway, Altiria's just expecting Din to get so judgemental that he misses everything going on in front of him. It nearly happened already with Pascal.... Rather than explaining things, he expected Conan to be another nobleman, and simply just hoped he could take care of things.

tl;dr: Conan ain't human, Din doesn't learn from his mistakes

Respheal

Hahaha that also addresses the question of why Alty didn't just tell Din (Communication, what's that?). Something that wild....Din wouldn't believe it even if (or perhaps especially if) Altiria just told him

Some things you gotta see for yourself xD

Or maybe they just wanna see Din faceplant

Kabocha

Well, that, and if Conan's even a fragment of the Gale, then that leaves him open to manipulation by magicians... Conan: I give command Din: I follow command.... BY USING YOU Conan: noes

Respheal

>:D(edited)

Kabocha

Also for the title, it makes sense? The Gale is bound....

Jo Michelle

Oh gosh, the end of Chap 5. YES. I was trying to figure out my favorite scene, but that would totally be it.

RebelVampire

tbf altiria could just believe both. that din wouldnt believe her and that she loves the idea of din faceplanting

Jo Michelle

Wait. If Con is Felix with the memories locked away, then, Conan's like "nice Light" in that section of Death Note SPOILERwhere he forgets about the book and is genuinely helping the police....END SPOILER ..... Oh no. Felix. What trap have you set for the world as soon as you get your memories back? This actually works well with my "Conan turns into a sociopath" theory..... jess sayin'

RebelVampire

i like this twist

that its cause felix has an awful plan in store

Kabocha

I dunno, I'm personally a fan of Conan being the Gale in human form.

Jo Michelle

Maybe he is, and he's also lost his memory of that?

RebelVampire

he can be both

Jo Michelle

He's the "power of the hurricane?"

https://genius.com/Frank-wildhorn-jack-murphy-and-ivan-menchell-hurricane-lyrics(edited)

That was a REAL reach there.... but, lyrics from the Death Note musical, sung by Light.

Don't underestimate my ability to reference three different things at once, and make a crack theory for Gb.

RebelVampire

Felix realized he was a part of the Gale but that the time was not right for the Shadowlord. So he sealed his memories, de-aged, and became Conan so that once the seal broke, it would be time to become the Shadowlord, merge with the Gale, and bring true destruction upon this land.

Kabocha

Bwahahahaha! The Dusk is an unjust land. The Gale can end it all peacefully with the power of the Shadowlord. It all comes tumbling down, tumbling down, tumbling down~

Respheal

To reference a crack theory from the GB server, if Din is destined to become the Shadowlord, I love the idea of Conan being the Gale

I'm a sucker for that sort of dichotomy

Kabocha

You say "Crack theory," I say "I've seen this before"

Jo Michelle

well, then, I feel obligated to copy/paste these lyrics:

I'll bring the rain

I'll bring the wind

I am the mighty hurricane

The human stains

And all their sins

Blown away

I'll bring the pain

So be afraid

I will bring the power of the hurricane

Conan's new life song?

Respheal

>:D

MJ Massey

I stan Conan as a Gale piece

MJ Massey

that would explain why he has no memories

maybe he's not Conan at all

Respheal

Okay before I gotta get to work I'll answer the questions, too because why not 1. Favorite scene....I tend to like scenes where the onion layers of a character get peeled back a bit and you get to see who they really are. For...well, kind of both Conan and Din, this is after the Pascal Incident™, when the dust is settling and the shock starts to wear off. We see Din as he is, a broken and terrified man stuck in an unfair and cruel system, backed into a corner. Conan, a young man thrown in a situation way out of his depth, but also a dutiful person willing to admit and correct his mistakes.

RebelVampire

#ConanDidNothingWrong

Respheal

http://www.galebound.com/comics/2681466/125/ http://www.galebound.com/comics/2683677/126/ <- these two pages specifically(edited)

Well not knowingly xD

......I'm going to avoid answering question 2 because my powers of bullshittery are weak and of course I know the real answer But Conan being the Gale.....well, trapping something that powerful in a human body would probably wreck havoc on that person....Wiping that person's memories as a result is plausible (edited)

RebelVampire

the real answer to number 2 is that Altiria realized that the entire comic is just a DnD campaign cause they were able to see the real life person who is controlling Conan. and they saw Conan's stat sheet, compared it to Din's, and realized Din got shitty rolls. cause Altiria is controlled by the DM.

Kabocha

But Alty's comparing a Magician to a Nobleman... Noblemen generally have a pretty good charisma modifier

RebelVampire

i feel sort of bad im the only one who picked a not super sad scene

im sorry for choosing to be happy everyone

Jo Michelle

I think you're in the wrong webcomic if you want happy....

SPOILER What did Altiria see that caused them such distress? END SPOILER

Okay. Here's what I think. Alty discovered that Conan's already signed a contract with Ursula, and they're like, mortal enemies with her.

Respheal

SURE

Jo Michelle

Instead of losing his voice, he's lost his memories until he can make Din fall in love with him.

And we all know.... that's never gonna happen.

RebelVampire

you lost be at din

this does not suit my conan/pascal ship

Jo Michelle

But, see, if he had his memories, all he'd need to do was tell Din to, since he's still got his voice.

no, see, this is why Con's doomed to fail.

Since, we all know that would never happen.

And when Ursula gave him the contract, she's like, "see, I even left you your voice to use as a Nobleman."

Respheal

> Contract Confirmed, Conan is a Warlock

.....or a Magical Girl

Jo Michelle

A MG who's doomed to fail.

Because, of course he is.

Kabocha

...Conan is Homura?

Jo Michelle

That doesn't feel quite right as a fit.....

Okay, but which ever one he is, his transformation into the Gale or Shadowlord will be when he gives into despair, and realizes his hopes were doomed from the beginning.

MJ Massey

why not both a warlock AND a magical girl. two times the tragedy

Respheal

>:D

I am okay with this

Kabocha

Everyone is doomed

Sarai

ok there have been a lot of great scenes in Galebound so far, but i think the one that always jumps out to me is where I first jumped into the comic, when Pascal snuck into the Inn during the dark hour

For me, that scene is what shifted my opinion from "oh this is neat i wonder what happens next" to "DANG SON THIS AUTHOR MEANS BUSINESS"

MJ Massey

I think that's my favorite scene too

Sarai

also i think i found it on a thursday or something, because by the time i caught up there was a new page Din in all his yellow magician-y glory, and Pascal in the middle of a swear XD

Jo Michelle

"You kiss your momma with that mouth?" Oh, yeah. She's dead. Never mind.

Respheal

That wouldn't stop Din from threatening Pascal with soap

MJ Massey

it's more like "would you kiss ME with that mouth? how dare...!"

Jo Michelle

oh that's just weird.

MJ Massey

that Din expects brother kisses?

Jo Michelle

I feel like Din is definitely one of those "do as I say not as I do" parenting styles.

RebelVampire

Din: Don't sell out magician children to the Nobleman. Pascal: But- Din: Do as I say, not as I do!

Kabocha

"You can't seize the means of production without being NEAR the means of production!"

Sarai

oh shoot i realized i never answered the second question

as far as theories go, i don't really have any I haven't been given enough information to really form an idea other than conan's dad leaving, him getting sick, and then his memories disappearing, are all connected somehow

OTHER THAN THAT i'm just along for the ride

Jo Michelle

Oh, they're connected. Felix definitely poisoned him.

A side affect was losing his memory.(edited)

Sarai

o-oh.....ok

But why tho

Jo Michelle

Does Felix need a reason? Other than he's Felix?

Sarai

you got me there

I was thinking it was something magic-related, not necessarily a mundane childhood illness or someone else's doing

Jo Michelle

He used a magical potion.

Sarai

but really, all i know for sure is that i'm young, dumb, and a complete sucker for sick fics

Jo Michelle

A memory destroying potion. Getting sick was the side affect.

Sarai

or sick cannon, as it be

Jo Michelle

He needed to destroy his memory, since Conan knew ...... something.....

give me a minute.

Sarai

he walked in on felix SPOILER getting pollinated by a flower daemon END SPOILER

HE SAW TOO MUCH

Jo Michelle

That'll give anyone an automatic sickness and memory loss.

Sarai

maybe that's why altiria was so mad

Jo Michelle

But, for real..... I think Conan knew something about a BIG baddie's plan, and Felix gave him a memory blocking potion.

Note, for real should have been written "for real" ..... since I know things. :puffer:

Sarai

oh yeah, i forgot you weren't a lowly pleb like me XD

Jo Michelle

:puffer:

Sarai

you patreon people with your fancy spoiler privileges and early scripts

Jo Michelle

For real though, I actually don't know why or exactly how he lost his memory. I have guesses, but nothing's confirmed.

So I'm going with memory potion.

And he knows SOMETHING big. I'll bet that's why Alty freaked out too.

HE KNOWS A THING THAT MUST NOT BE SHARED.

Respheal

This is true, even patrons don't have the exact details yet

Muahahahaha >:3c

Jo Michelle

I'll bet it's the secret to bringing down the Gale, but that would also destroy the world.

And Alty's like "nope. No way."

"Your memory's a ticking time bomb."

Sarai

I'm assuming.....we'll be revisiting that moment from childhood at some point, right?

Respheal

I do sometimes describe Conan as SPOILER a time bomb END SPOILER ....

Uhhhhhhh

Probably not in full flashback form unfortunately

Jo Michelle

I'm RIGHT. My theory is now confirmed.

Conan has a secret hidden in his childhood memories that could destroy the world. And Alty figured it was better to make sure it's never revealed.

Respheal

"Not again"

Is a thing Alty yelled

Jo Michelle

Wait. WHAT?

Mahotou

http://www.galebound.com/comics/2529569/086/(edited)

Jo Michelle

.........

Mahotou

c:

Jo Michelle

I have no idea what to make of this.

Mahotou

i have fears

Respheal

:3c

Mahotou

c,:

Jo Michelle

Well. I'm just gonna assume Felix managed to do something REALLY horrible to the dang ocean and Conan knows how he did it, if he'd only remember.

When in doubt, I always blame Felix.

It's worked so far.

Respheal

That's fair

Sarai

one fear

Jo Michelle

To be fair, if something destroyed the ocean, that would definitely hurt the Dusk, sooooooo RIP Conan. The world needs its ocean more than another Nobleman. Sorry. No hard feelings?

AND. Felix, after nearly destroying the ocean went off to face the Gale, and ....... well...... he's had a bit of a revolving life ever since.... :puffer:

I lied. Felix didn't administer the memory potion. It was Conan's mom. To protect the world.

Felix was happy to have his son learn how to wreck havoc and destruction on the planet.

Sarai

i know we've slandered her before but it always feels so wrong

Jo Michelle

I'm not slandering Conan's mom. Just saying she made a hard choice between her son's memory, and the world.

Felix is the one who made her have to make such a choice.

Still totally his fault. He just left her to deal with the aftermath when he left to take on the Gale.

Kabocha

You know how I said Conan is the Gale? Maybe people tried this before. What could a lone nobleman with a daemon fragment inside him do... ...enrage Alty, that's what.

Jo Michelle

WAIT. Was that what happened when he got sick?

Felix was inserting a daemon into him?

Respheal

Having a literal hurricane stuffed into a child's body would probably have that effect(edited)

Jo Michelle

In the eye of a hurricane

There is quiet

For just a moment

A yellow sky

I was twelve when my mother died

She was holding me

We were sick and she was holding me

I couldn’t seem to die

I couldn't resist

Kabocha

What daemon hell has Felix wrought...?!

Respheal

Oh

Oh that song

Mahotou

Is felix systematically destroying the world one element at a time? Ocean, Gale, .. what next. Fire?(edited)

Respheal

Oh shit Conan was twelve at the time(edited)

Kabocha

I mean

Jo Michelle

Wait. WHAT?

I thought he was like, 7 or 8

Respheal

No that's when Felix left xD(edited)

Kabocha

@Mahotou if he's taking the elements... ...then. that explains where his heart went

Is he trying to make captain planet

Mahotou

negative captain planet

reverse captain planet

Kabocha

He wants to start dusk on a rotation

Mahotou

If i change the gale, i can get the world spinning

Kabocha

He's getting captain planet to make all of dusk habitable

Although everyone will freak out at their newfound nights...

Mahotou

#SAVETHEPLANET

D:!?

WHAT A TWIST

FELIX IS UPSETTING THE WORLD TO SAVE IT

Respheal

Irony (edited)

Kabocha

Gotta crack some eggs to make a cake

Jo Michelle

Eh. That's just cause his mom told him one time that he couldn't live in the Shadow or the Galelands.

And he doesn't like being told "no"

Mahotou

aaaand we're back to the normal slander. ;D

Kabocha

No, Felix's DAD told him no

Jo Michelle

Sure.

Kabocha

Felix has daddy issues, because his dad disappeared for years....

Mahotou

we haven't talked much about Conan's grandparents. makes me think about them now lol

Jo Michelle

It's a whole legacy of being horrible fathers.

I mean, they ARE Noblemen.

Mahotou

and then what of the mom's side. how was she raised?

Kabocha

His father had a reason though: international business

Jo Michelle

Oh. I see. One of those guys who destroy some other country for cheap labor. Yep. Sounds like a Nobleman.(edited)

Kabocha

She was arranged in that marriage

Jo Michelle

Oh, yeah. She didn't have a choice.

Sarai

heck even in non magical families abuse gets handed down through the generations - i wouldn't be surprised if Felix had an equally bad relationship with one or both of his parents

Kabocha

Oh, she might have had a choice

Jo Michelle

What, you think anyone would choose to marry Felix?

Kabocha

It might have been to improve her own circumstances... Or because Evenheim was closer to Cymaria... Or.... [Makes up bullshit about Felix's parents]

Oh, I was talking about Felix's mom

Not his wife

Jo Michelle

Oh, I thought we were talking about Conan's mom.

Mahotou

@Jo Michelle only if he's ... some how... not Felix?

xD

OH me too i thought we were talking about conan's mom too(edited)

Jo Michelle

I stand by the "some parent or person forced her to marry Felix" theory.

Kabocha

But what if she LIKED Felix

Respheal

gasp

Jo Michelle

What, LIKE Felix?!?

Mahotou

SLANDER?

Kabocha

Alternatively, she could be like... Charlotte Lucas, who married, but arranged Mr. Collins' day so he was out of the way...

Jo Michelle

You realize that if she actually cared about Felix, him leaving would be even more painful. I prefer to think of it as a relief to her.

She got a happy few years with her son and no Felix.

Kabocha

Maybe she liked the idea of Felix, but he was actually really annoying and overbearing

Felix wanted a life in the clergy

Jo Michelle

Oh, I'm sure he was super annoying and overbearing.

Sarai

don't forget neurotic

Everything had to be done just so

Jo Michelle

Oh yeah. She had to do it exactly the way he said.

Sarai

"no conan, you can't plant the lettuce 2 inches apart they must be 2 1/2"

Jo Michelle

"yes papa."

-Get's measuring tape from house to make sure-

See? Why would anyone marry that out of choice?

Definitely an arranged marriage. Or something like it.

Sarai

wait res, how many years ago did felix and celia get married

Kabocha

I hope we don't run into anyone worse than Felix

Respheal

Uhhhhhhh

24 I think

Yeah

Sarai

ok so not marriage of convenience then

Jo Michelle

:puffer:

Sarai

just running through all our options here

Kabocha

In this week's chat: All the Felix hate

Jo Michelle

And @RebelVampire isn't even here to defend the jerk.

Mahotou

There s so much slander happening lol

Respheal

Mostly about Felix xD Which is....fair....Based on what we know so far of him, surely he isn't up to anything good

Darkhalo4321

Hey

Felix is a good dad deep down i am sure...

i refuse to believe otherwise

Jo Michelle

Oh, yeah. Leave his kid to plant and morn his mom alone. But he's a good dad deep down, so it's all good. It's all good.

Kabocha

He had neighbors

Darkhalo4321

He was in good hands.

Sometimes a good dad lets better people raise their kids.

keii4ii

I'm walking in and am somewhat confused by the whole room just BURNIN' with Felix hate

insert 'pizza guy walks into a room on fire' gif

Respheal

Keiiii

Felix is just a very polarizing character.....for someone who hasn't actually shown up yet lol

keii4ii

Dedicating the following emoji to Felix tonight:

keii4ii

I bet some of the characters would approve of the Felix hate though

RebelVampire

Felix is gonna turn out to be a great dude and @Jo Michelle is gonna eat a hat out of frustration when that happens

im saving all my felix propaganda for the felix question thats later in the week O_O

Kabocha

Hahaha!

The basis of Felix hate really hinges on two pages

http://www.galebound.com/comics/2432399/059/ And http://www.galebound.com/comics/2674968/123/

http://www.galebound.com/comics/2683677/126/ this page also maybe helps, but I don't trust Din to see things well under duress

keii4ii

^ Same (No offense, Din.)

RebelVampire

you couldve left that at "I don't trust Din"

that's all that needs to be said

RebelVampire

QUESTION 3. At the moment, who is your favorite character? What about that character earns them this favor?

QUESTION 4. What do you think will happen once Din and Conan reach Cymaria? Will Din’s plans unravel, or will the two manage to slay the queen? What will be the consequences of either path?

RebelVampire

3) Felix who is the best character who is trying to save the world. It's definitely not Pascal. It's not like Pascal is the best dresser and basically is the dude that gets the short end of the stick throughout the comic. Not to mention Pascal definitely isn't just adorable or anything. Plus, Pascal isn't even the most reasonable of the characters who is filled with surprises yet just wants everone to be alive and happy for his parties. 4) Everyone will sit down for tea. Realistically? Din's plans will fall apart because of whatever reasons Alty knows. Plus, I think Din overestimates his skills as a magician and underestimates the difficulty in killing a monarch, not to mention a nobleman. and thus Conan and Din will be in jail or wanted men or something. And then Pascal will become an accomplice and they'll all flee Cymaria trying to outrun their wanted posters and searching for Felix to punch him in the face. So ya know, Galebound will just be the most epic fantasy road trip, maybe with bank robberies. Honestly, does anyone actually think Din is going to succeed? I feel there isn't anyone who has faith in him.

Jo Michelle

I was called OUT last night.(edited)

Fave Character? Definitely Pascal. Most intriguing character, as in, onion layers of emotion I'm anticipating seeing stripped away? Din.

Reach Cymaria? Oooohhh, that's a good question. I think the queen is secretly super evil, and actually working for scary grin lady in the prologue. But she's also super smooth talking and smart, and will trick Conan into listening to her, poor sap that he is, and get him to turn on Din. MAYBE, Conan will even start to think he's falling in love with her – but then find out she's been using him, and make him even more upset, when he realizes he almost cheated on Lucie for this person.

RebelVampire

Lucie couldve been Conan's mistress at least.

Jo Michelle

OH no. I don't see her being okay with such an arrangement.

RebelVampire

tbf we havent met the real lucie yet. maybe shes secretly a gold digger who knew conan was a prince all along and just wanted that sweet evenheim gold

Jo Michelle

Hum. That's a good point.

And I already said what I think of Conan's judgment with women, so I guess I can't fall back on "but Conan wouldn't have loved her if she wasn't good."

Okay. Point made. Fine.

RebelVampire

the one good thing din did for conan

saved him from proposing to the wrong girl

Jo Michelle

Re: Felix is a Good Dude: I'm just using the Sirius test:

Sirius shook his head and said, “She’s got the measure of Crouch better than you have, Ron. If you want to know what a man’s like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.”

.... You want to know the measure of a Nobleman? Ask a Magician.(edited)

There's no reason to hide your true nature from a person who has to do literally whatever you tell them to.

RebelVampire

but the only magician we can ask is din and din is a biased source who is basing his hatred on info that is years out of date

Jo Michelle

Eh. How an adult treated you as a child is not a bad estimate either.

I'm not saying he couldn't have changed. Just that I'm gonna have to see some darn good evidence of that change.

In Din's case, he was in the inferior position as both a Magician and a child.

To be fair, full disclosure – I don't think Felix is the worst person ever. Heck, he might be pretty typical of Noblemen. I mean, his treatment of Din could be totally normal. But that doesn't make it any better, or excuse him one bit.(edited)

RebelVampire

thats fair. i more think its better to assume neutrality and give benefit of the doubt that he isnt the same person. which gives room also for him to be far worse too, but hey gives him a chance

i will point out though that conan barely didnt anything wrong on purpose and din hated him on principle

din is himself not the best person XD

Jo Michelle

Din is what Felix made him.

Felix, and others.

Din was a lost, confused, hurting, traumatized boy.

But let's not forget who, at least, contributed to that.(edited)

RebelVampire

Din is also an adult now and in charge of his own choices though. And his adult choices are garbage. If Felix had been abused and locked in a closet, would that excuse the choices he made? XD

Jo Michelle

Oh, I'm not excusing Din now. That's the problem with pain and trauma – the way it spreads.(edited)

BUT, the person with power here is still Felix.

Even if Din is responding totally wrong, the people with the power are still the Noblemen, so the greater responsibility for ending the violence still rests on them.

It's like the moral equivalency fallacy of [spoiler blocked for those who don't want to think about politics] SPOILER of white supremacists and anti-racism bombings, such as in South Africa. No, killing innocent people isn't right and will just produce more pain and suffering, but the two aren't equivalent, because of power. END SPOILER This is why I judge Felix more harshly than Din.

RebelVampire

That's fair.

I can't take the same path cause I don't think all the evidence is in order. Cause we haven't met Felix, don't actually have a factual account of what he even did to Din, and so forth. So while I can agree that Felix can be judged more harshly via power in certain contexts, I think its unfair to cast judgement at the moment.

Kabocha

Question: How do we know that whatever Felix and Din's interaction was, that it wasn't like... Self defense?

It was clearly BAD, but Din was a child

Jo Michelle

That's also fair. But, for me, the burden of proof will be on Felix.

RebelVampire

yeah thats another reason i dont trust Din's account of everything and label him a biased source. Cause he was a child at the time of whatever happened just by the context clues

cause kids dont generally have all the info to a situation.

cause adults dont tell

also cause they have kid brains

not to mention were expecting din's account to even be accurate after years

and memories are faulty

even when trauma is involved

which again

Felix may be the most awful person in the world

I just pass no judgement based on Din's account

as far as im concerned, din is no better than the boy who cried wolf right now

which acually is a better analogy then i intended. cause his hatred of conan really damages his case against felix.

which inevitably makes me sorry for Din if Felix is as awful as he thinks

Din is undoing his own case

Jo Michelle

No, Din is just proving my point about power and Noblemen in general. I recently heard and wrote down a great definition of racism: Prejudice + Power to enforce your Prejudice = Racism That's why oppressed people can be prejudice, but not racist. So, sure, Din is prejudiced against Noblemen in general, and Felix in particular, but that's mostly from experience. Conan seems to be his first encounter with a Nobleman that didn't confirm his expectations.

RebelVampire

i think this convo is going a bit too political at this point so im gonna reign it in

Jo Michelle

Okay, sorry.

RebelVampire

no its fine. im just reigning it in before it goes too far to real world.

cause at this point were touching on a very sensitive, relevant real world topic.

and thats inviting chaos

Jo Michelle

Should I spoiler hide that last comment?

RebelVampire

nah cause when i archive it, itll be visible anyway.

Jo Michelle

ah.

Really?

good to know.

RebelVampire

yeah. someday i will address that if i get a real website for CTP, but right now things are just archived as plain text.

At least we can agree that Pascal is the best

I mean umm...Felix. Yes. Definitely not Pascal.

Pascal the angel

Respheal

The abuse of greatness is when it disjoins remorse from power

Not gonna lie, I didn't expect this story to touch on some real world problems when I first started writing it x'D this was just going to be a road trip(edited)

RebelVampire

tbf you overthink anything too much and you can put real life themes on it.

which is whats supposed to happen

it is the mark of good fiction

Respheal

Yeah, and it...worked? x'D but I do realize that because these Very Real Themes are a part of it now, I have to be able to handle those themes respectfully.(edited)

I will answer question 3 in a bit and make you all mad that the answer is Felix (edited)

....actually nvm I should answer based only on the current canon ahahaha

RebelVampire

yes pick Felix O_O

i cant pick felix cause hes not in the story yet

maybe someday

Respheal

Felix actually is my fave, but yeah he's not in the story yet. Although he has clearly had a huge impact on it so far. He's like a massive object and every other character is sucked into his gravity well

If I had to pick from current canon (which is like the boys and Altiria).....that's a tough call

RebelVampire

obviously altiria since they can just drown everyone

Respheal

You're right. The only sensible choice

I am actually struggling to pick so let's go with that

Kabocha

3. At the moment, who is your favorite character? What about that character earns them this favor? Altiria! I'm sorry, Alty's natrually quite salty. It just flows out of them seamlessly... Altiria seas and knows all in the world, for Altiria is all water... Water we waiting for, we should all cheer for our water god! 4. What do you think will happen once Din and Conan reach Cymaria? Will Din’s plans unravel, or will the two manage to slay the queen? What will be the consequences of either path? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA Conan's gon' die. Unless they opt for an infiltration - Din only has to bring Conan to Cymaria... Right? I guess it depends on how that command's interpreted

RebelVampire

maybe they never make it to court. maybe they stop at burger king on the way but pascal wont let them leave until he gets all the toys from the kids meal

and nobody told him you didnt have to buy the meal to get the toy

MJ Massey

4. What do you think will happen once Din and Conan reach Cymaria? Will Din’s plans unravel, or will the two manage to slay the queen? What will be the consequences of either path?

I think they'll intend to slay the queen but then find out she's not the true villain. She's actually pretty cool, but it's the royal vizier/high priest/magician who's the REAL villain. They'll team up to try to stop them, but the queen will inadvertently die in the process and it turns out SPOILER she was Felix the whole time END SPOILER

Jo Michelle

SPOILER Not gonna lie, I didn't expect this story to touch on some real world problems when I first started writing it x'D this was just going to be a road trip END SPOILER

I thought the same thing, friend. We all did, I think.

Respheal

As for question 4......well, we're not even all the way through act 1 so of course things are gonna hit the fan

RebelVampire

the bigger question is how can galebound end happily

Jo Michelle

Things, huh? :cornytea:

Kabocha

The bigger question is: CAN it end happily

Respheal

That is actually a good question

Kabocha

I posit the following: No.

MJ Massey

I agree

no way Res is gonna let the cast off that easy

RebelVampire

everything will turn out fine. then a rogue meteor will come and crash into the planet, pushing it out of orbit

Jo Michelle

I'm trusting in Res's enjoyment of the end of "Speak".... it's literally the only evidence I've got going for my hope in a "happy" ending...(edited)

Kabocha

@RebelVampire This isn't Final Fantasy!!

RebelVampire

thats just what res wants us to think

felix is the meteor

Respheal

A sufficiently large meteor might kick the planet out of its tidal locking therefore eliminating the extreme focused heat that fuels the Gale

RebelVampire

ya know i was mostly just joking, but then res came in and said that

i think this is as good as canon

Kabocha

ominous chanting

Respheal

If this were Final Fantasy the eclipse planet would come crashing down but right before it hits--surprise it was a giant dragon's prison all along so it's death by dragon instead of by meteor

RebelVampire

and felix was the imprisoned dragon?

which is where hes been all this time

Respheal

Yes

Kabocha

...So it's not Final Fantasy, it's Fire Emblem

RebelVampire

Fire Fantasy

well just combine them

Mahotou

Final Emblem

RebelVampire

Fire Fantasy V: The Final Emblem

Jo Michelle

Felix is a dragon. I can live with that.

RebelVampire

ok so its been approved. Felix is a dragon canon is a go.

can sleep on his pile of gold and kidnap princesses

and eat them

Jo Michelle

Like Conan's mom. She was a kidnapped princess.

Respheal

......So Conan's part dragon now?

RebelVampire

yes

see

Jo Michelle

Confirmed.

RebelVampire

this canon gets better and better

conan is gonna wake up one morning and wonder why he can breathe fire

Jo Michelle

That literally happened in a kids book I read once.

Kabocha

reads chat

...So Conan is a Manakete, which explains why Dusk time seems so weird to him if their solar cycle is............ rapid

It's not that dusk is fast, it's that Conan is old

WAIT CONAN IS GRIMA

Respheal

You caught me

Jo Michelle

I need to see a Conan art with dragon fire or wings now.

Sarai

There was a story I read where dragons took human form and could only access their dragon form through a magic device passed down through their family

I'm not saying conan's pocketwatch lets him turn into a dragon but

Mahotou

Are these hypothetical dragons... daemons?

Respheal

They probably would be

Mahotou

xD more Conan Hybrid Theory

Sarai

But important to note, in that story only full-blooded dragons could transform

Half-dragons ended up with horns and tails and lizard-like ear flaps

RebelVampire

conan hasnt hit dragon puberty yet. din is in for a nasty surprise

Sarai

BUT since we're talking about Conan, I'm gonna say he's my favorite right now, in an answer to question 3

I'm in love with Pascal and the sun shines a little brighter every time I see him, but Conan is one of the few characters I can point to and say "hey, he thinks like me!"

Mahotou

#relatable

Sarai

We have a strikingly similar way of processing things and making decisions, and I don't see that a lot in fiction

Especially fantasy

Jo Michelle

Good job Res!

Sarai

That's why I couldnt get mad at him for the Pascal Incident™

Its exactly what I would have done

Jo Michelle

That's fair. .....

Kabocha

(guys I think the inside jokes are escaping)

Jo Michelle

which ones?

I mean, other than Shadowlord.

Felix is the worst

Kabocha

The SHADOWLORD CANNOT BE CONTAINED

hybrid theory

conan is secretly going to end the world... etc

................... Carry on

Jo Michelle

Okay, I see your point.

RebelVampire

oh man if were basing fave character on who we relate to the most, idk who to pick

maybe lucie for me cause shes the character who is just back at home not getting involved with all the adventures

Respheal

yet

Mahotou

what's lucy going to do when she finds her best bud is missing? for two/three dark hours(edited)

Kabocha

Rebel, how do you handle spoiler tags in archives?

Jo Michelle

Well, that would be Checkers.

RebelVampire

they are visible as plain text

Respheal

I'm okay with that being visible, I'm half saying it out of humor xD

RebelVampire

cause there just isnt a good way to do them in regards to tumblr's setup

@Mahotou im gonna repeat a thing i said on the server for in regards to what lucie will do: just assume he went and pulled a felix and get herself a new boyfriend

Mahotou

OH NO

xD

looking at the questions, I don't know who's my fav as a character. but I like Pascal as a person c:

sweet boy cant catch a break

that's like his description too or something

Respheal

It is xD

Mahotou

too good for this world. cant catch a break

xD

oh and for question 4. What if! Conan got kidnapped by the Cymaria Court and he gets a WHOLE OTHER view of this situation? they try to convince him of their side away from Din.

Mahotou

I think i got this idea from Fire Emblem. Birthright/Conquest

two sides of one situation O: dun dun dunnnnn

Jo Michelle

Ooohhhh

That would be a twist.

Mahotou

# NOW who's the bad guy? Conan technically has limited information but he DOES have experience with the magic and obligation on magicians. and the weird amulet

but what if truths are twisted? Who should he side with O: dun dun dunnnnn

... he'd prolly wanna go home to his Lucie and forget this lol(edited)

RebelVampire

semi off topic, but arcein. arcein is the bad guy.

if they talk like a villain, smile like a villain, and do creepy vague shit like villains, theyre probably a villain

Mahotou

/subvert expectations OH LETS MAKE HER THE GOOD GUY XD

300 year old spirit thing with creepy grin in an amulet. was trapped like a Genie when she tried to do a good but it did a bad/

Wish we knew more about her in canon. She could be a fav character O:

Kabocha

gotta wonder how many people in galebound are actually good guys

and Din's just the one who wants to burn the world

Sarai

conan is a goode boye

and so is pascal

he tried to be mean once boy nearly put himself into an angst coma

enshogirl

The Good: Artemis (#1 good), Pascal, Conan The Bad: Din, Felix, Altiria and The Ugly: Arcein, King Cymaria

Respheal

Altiria as bad? xD

RebelVampire

i mean

i dont think you can say altiria is good either

Respheal

I guess for the most part I consider daemons to be neutral(edited)

RebelVampire

thats fair although from a story perspective she has attempted murder of conan on her book

Respheal

Truuuuuue

enshogirl

I don’t trust her

RebelVampire

QUESTION 5. What has been your favorite illustration in the comic so far? What specifically about it do you like?

QUESTION 6. How do you think Pascal will adjust to being both deaf and cut off from magic? How will he wind up helping or hurting Din and Conan? Ultimately, do you think Pascal’s life will be better or worse for what happened?

Kabocha

For question 5... http://www.galebound.com/comics/2449333/064/ THIS PANEL Holy shit Res really pulled off magic with this one!! I just love the energy and the sense of Din's sheer power here. In retrospect, you have to wonder if it was amplified because he was really following two commands at once? As far as Pascal goes... I think Pascal's honestly going to adjust. He's adaptable, and strikes me as the type of person who takes life as it comes. So this sort of outcome might actually be a bit freeing in some respects... ...Although in the meantime, I'm sure there'll be lots of worrying about what he's good for, what'll happen to him, and such... He's no longer useful to anyone as a magician, really.

(That is to say, I'm looking forward to Pascal fostering kittens. That's clearly what he's got to do with his life after this!!)

MJ Massey

I feel like Pascal has strong strangling hands

Jo Michelle

I CAN'T choose a page! Or an illustration. But it would definitely be one of those in the end of chap 5 ... ALL THE FEELS THERE.

MJ Massey

so he's going to become a pro strangler

Jo Michelle

Although I'm kinda super partial to the illustration that's going up for today It's so heartbreaking and pretty, okay?!?

Actually, I think Pascal is going to go through a quarter life crisis, buy a muscle carstrong horse and take off on a road trip across the Dusk to "find himself."(edited)

Freedom, baby!

Jo Michelle

But I'm kinda in love with Din's half lit expression from this page: http://www.galebound.com/comics/2771099/147/(edited)

Respheal

Quarter life crisis

Jo Michelle

I mean, he's not quite at a quarter life, but..... he's getting there?

And I LOVE the body language in this one: http://www.galebound.com/comics/2780569/150/

Especially Len. My new favorite side character. The adult this problem child needs.

Kabocha

As far as head canons are concerned... All we know at the moment is she was SHOCKED that Din did what he did.

Jo Michelle

Oh, you know I can build an entire life history from a face shot and three paragraphs about Felix. I've got way more about Len here.

Kabocha

https://tenor.com/view/tea-shade-goth-halloween-gif-4637758

RebelVampire

5) For favorite illustration, I gotta go with Pascal gets his butt beat #1 http://www.galebound.com/comics/2369956/040/ The lighting on this is really great. Plus I really like the slanted angle it has going on. I think there's something about that choice that really makes you empathize with Conan. Cause much like the angle is expressing something is kind of not right in terms of the balance of the world, this is the first time extreme magic is at play. So it really puts you in Conan's shoes where you're like "Is this happening my life is a lie" 6) Deaf I think he'll go with easily cause I think for Pascal that one will be easier to roll with the punches for. Magic? That sounds harder if you've basically relied on it for most of your life. Cause at that point I'd think it'd be an instinctual thing that's gonna hurt when you try to fire blast someone but forget you cant actually do that anymore. Pascal's life will probably be better. He can chameleon into the crowd now and party all the parties. As for helping or hurting Din and Conan, I feel like hurt might be more likely. Just cause Pascal is kind of a distraction for Din. Cause Din was doing okay but everytime Pascal showed up he had to change his plans. Which I guess is me saying Pascal is Din's bad luck charm.

Jo Michelle

Oh, yeah, that's a GREAT moment. It's actually one of those that came to mind.

Respheal

I'm still really happy with Conan's expression on that page

Jo Michelle

Oh yeah. "Shi--" just hit the fan there.

RebelVampire

i think everyone's faces looks there. one of the few pages where im like "Din isn't that bad a dude" O_O

RebelVampire

overall i like any page that's a double spread for illustration. cause while mobile design is the way to go, it means theres less and less double spreads going on. so when i see them i squee

Respheal

I enjoy doing those pages, too xD Ironically they tend to be faster to make since they're just 1-2 panels, so I try to go more all out with it >:D

Mahotou

5. Favorite illustration? well i have one that got me rolling back into doing art after a huge time away from it. break-my-heart its pascal's face here (second to last panel) : http://www.galebound.com/comics/2592094/101/(edited)

my fave pics are very emotional i think

Sarai

that page also features Din angrily buttoning his waistcoat as he tries to glare his brother into silence XD

Mahotou

http://www.galebound.com/comics/2639011/115/ oh and o boy this one. the whole page.

RebelVampire

i counter your sadness with hilarious pascal http://www.galebound.com/comics/2484303/072-5/

Sarai

that one is great

Mahotou

6. How do you think Pascal will adjust to being both deaf and cut off from magic? I think, not being a Magician will be ok for Pascal. He may enjoy using magic or be good at it but he can only use it when commanded so I don't believe he'll feel totally lost without it. And maybe he can be sneaky and Queen Cymaria will attempt to command him because he's supposed to be a Court Magician but then he'd be liek nahh and she'd be surprised and TeamGrump can get the upperhand. O: but also now he has to have the amulet always with him too. He has to always be touching it or else he'll start dying again so i kinda feel like this physical object may be troublesome. (but i'm sure he'll be a smart cookie and thing of something to keep it in place.) How will he wind up helping or hurting Din and Conan? hmmm. well he's MORE of a free spirit now, as he's outside the Obligation. and he's always been a ninja (good climber --> (roof boy: http://www.galebound.com/comics/2358585/032/) so he can be helpful by going on errands. but heeeee wouldn't notice if he was being noisy... so he's losing stealth points. Deafness... he'll probably miss his hearing but I think he's a talented learner and will come up with hand signals between himself and friends/Din and also practice lip reading. @Rebel: He can chameleon into the crowd now and party all the parties. but he cant hear the music at the parties now D: i've just made myself really sad.... Ultimately, do you think Pascal’s life will be better or worse for what happened? Better because he won't have the Obligation around. ... or... or worse because he now has to have this amulet so now instead of the Obligation being a part of his life, he now has to care about this amulet for liek... the rest of his life. and he has be careful to always be touching it in some way. Maybe that's ok tho. and life will be fine and the brothers will just take care of each other.

woops that was a loaded #6.

i think i rambled but i won't edit this xD

keii4ii

@enshogirl 's listing of Artemis as #1 good does make me think, though (and I agree with the sentiment )

I like Artemis a lot, almost weirdly so, and I'm starting to see why

This is a story where you can't trust anyone -- I mean Pascal may be a good boy, but you might not be entirely safe around him. So having someone you can trust is meaningful, even if that someone isn't a human X'D

and that says a lot about the story truly being a web of schemes!

Jo Michelle

It's totally true. You really can't totally trust Magicians.....

But then, they can't even trust their own brains and motivations....

Respheal

That's a good point, @keii4ii I wish I enjoyed drawing Artemis more, because she is important to Conan as a character. She's the lodestar of stability and sanity for him in this quest into the unknown

......what are those reacts lol

I feel like you read that as me being like "it'd be a shame if something happened to her :3c"

Jo Michelle

Oh, no, I was thinking about Conan.

Respheal

Oh hahaha

Jo Michelle

How a horse is the only person he can find stability and relational safety in.

Kabocha

@Respheal don't you dare take that horse's boy away from her

Mahotou

XD Club "Keep Artemis Safe"

RebelVampire

QUESTION 7. Which characters do you enjoy seeing interact the most? What about their dynamic interests you?

QUESTION 8. What do you think Din’s ultimate plans are? Is it killing Felix or is there a bigger story to his ambitions? How does killing the Queen of Cymaria even factor into them? What even motivated his plans in the first place?

Jo Michelle

Character interaction dynamics. Hum. I mean, we've only really seen Din, Con, Pasc, and Alty. But, I've got to say, I really like the Din/Alty dynamics. They know things about Din, and the way they tell him what's what is good.

And the Din/Pasc. The way they care about each other as brothers, but also bicker about stuff. That's fun.

Basically, I think I really like character interactions that draw out Din's emotions and force him to say and do things that reveal what's going on inside.

. Speaking of. Din's plans. I mean, he's out to kill Felix for sure. That 16YO Din wasn't acting. That was seething rage there. But I think his end game is to bring down the system somehow.

But I don't know enough about it to really say how he might be going about that.

MJ Massey

Din and Pascal have an interesting dynamic I want to see more of, both in flashbacks and in the present day

like how did Pascal get involved in everything and trying to kill Conan? Are he and Din on good terms or no?

Sarai

Pascal with anyone quite fankly

Considering the characters that have been introduced, his nature of pure sunshine conflicts so hard with everyone we've seen him talk to

But he just.....keeps on going

Respheal

Pascal's fun to write interactions with because he's good at keeping people just a little off balance--he talks fast, hops between topics, and just his overall sunshine demeanor bewilders xD I like to think Conan and Din play off each other well.....in, uh, better circumstances, maybe.

RebelVampire

7) I'm gonna go with Alty and Conan. I like how their interactions always really emphasis Alty is basically just on Alty's side. Cause they arent remorseful for trying to kill Conan, and even imply a bit they can still drown Conan at anytime. Yet at the same time Alty is also the person willing to warn Conan that Din is basically a dumbass. So whenever they interact theres always this uneasiness. I think a lot may be a change in the power dynamic cause even if Conan can command Din, theres only so much you can do to stop the ocean. 8) Din's plans are basically Step 1- Kill Felix Step 2 - ??? Step 3-Profit. Which is my way of saying i think calling what Din's "plans" plans is misleading. Rather, I think he has goals and just vague ideas of how to get to those goals. Like a kid with a treasure map who is finding the X but forgot to bring a shovel or backpack to carry back the treasure. I agree that Din probably wants to bring balance to the system. But I also think in his crazed mind he thinks that killing Felix is the way its gonna happen. I think Din gives Felix waaaaay too much credit. Although, honestly, I can't figure why he needs to kill the Queen. Like certainly this frees him from needing to be a court magician there. But unless theres a secret command from them that says "nah bro don't kill felix" i dont see how overthrowing a monarch works in Din's favor at all.

Mahotou

7.

@jo: And the Din/Pasc. The way they care about each other as brothers, but also bicker about stuff. That's fun.

Basically, I think I really like character inte

ractions that draw out Din's emotions and force him to say and do things that reveal what's going on inside. yasss 8. Din seems like a focus one track person. He wants to kill Felix. and he's still trying to reach that even tho Cymaria has him doing other magician errands first. But sounds like he almost got the command he wanted: "Bring me the head of Evenheim's heir" http://www.galebound.com/comics/2764870/145/ but he found Conan before Felix? maybe he thinks he can work with conan to convince/trick conan into giving him commands he wants.

Kabocha

7. Which characters do you enjoy seeing interact the most? What about their dynamic interests you? Din and Conan, honestly. I got friggin BAMBOOZLED when I started reading this. I was like, "hey they're staying in an inn, some shenanigans are gonna ensue!" AND THEN NOPE, MURDER ATTEMPT. So, what I thought was gonna be a fantasy buddy comedy turned out to be very much not that. And I kind of look forward to seeing how Din and Conan progress from snarky strangers to friends... Assuming Din doesn't get killed first.

8. What do you think Din’s ultimate plans are? Is it killing Felix or is there a bigger story to his ambitions? How does killing the Queen of Cymaria even factor into them? What even motivated his plans in the first place?

Din has a plan? Ever since Conan figured out he was able to command Din, it's kinda gone to shit, so... I think Din's ultimate plan was probably to kill the Cymarian nobility AND to kill Felix. http://www.galebound.com/comics/2332038/022/ Although I guess Conan didn't tell Din to tell him the truth, so... Din's a very angry man, probably motivated by the inherent injustice in the obligation. I think if he could have anything in life right now, it would be that he could be a normal person. He got the slightest taste of normalcy as a child, and... Well. :\

anyway I just need to say @Respheal how dare you bring us in thinking comedy and break us all like this so far

Respheal

>:D

RebelVampire

QUESTION 9. What sorts of art or story details have you noticed in the way the comic is crafted that you think deserves attention?

QUESTION 10. Who or what is the Arcein that Conan saw? Why do you think she seemed to know Felix, and how did Arcein’s Ignorance come to be? Also, what do you think Myosotis is, and why does Arcein want it?

Jo Michelle

Q. 9: Res's foreshadowing is really great. Little details that you only notice on reread. And snatches of dialogue or character actions that suddenly are WAY different when you know what's really going on.

RebelVampire

9) The careful choices in wording because command phrases are super OP. Like I would super hate writing a main cast who are a nobleman and a magician cause one ill choice of dialogue and poof, there goes continuity. So the fact its done so well is nice. 10) I'm assuming the Arcein we saw was basically a Horcrux. I assume by the nature of being mythical, Arcein is connected to the Gale in ways we don't understand. And the Gale is like big brother and is watching everyone, especially Felix. Idk what Myosotis is, but I'm sure Arcein wants it to destroy all nobleman or something like that. If Arcein isn't the pure evil one in this comic, I will eat my hat.

Respheal

But she was so helpful in saving Pascal~ :'3

RebelVampire

for now

unless pascal is locked away in a tower guarded 24/7 but the most elite soldiers, i will never believe Pascal is completely and truly safe in that world

Jo Michelle

But that's not safety. that's isolation, which isn't safe or healthy for any human.

There is no "complete and true safety." Life is risk.

RebelVampire

well put artemis in the tower too

then they can be alone together

and safe

also i said safe, i wasnt necessarily aiming for healthy there O_O

Jo Michelle

But unhealthy isn't safe.

And humans need more relationships in our lives than just one other creature.

And relationship always brings risk.

Respheal

also the alleged horcrux is strapped to his neck

Jo Michelle

I mean, there's risk.... and then there's..... risk.

that dang price

RebelVampire

i feel like you just insulted artemis by called her a risk as a relationship

secretly artemis had like 10 sugar daddy horses back home and spent all their money

conan is also her sugar daddy

literally cause he probably gives her sugar cubes

also see, to deal with arcein you just gotta cut the tower off from the gale. make a huge bubble area of ignorance

Mahotou

9) I totally understand why Res insisted on using full color. those auras need to be noticeable and different from each other. And its really niceeeee. I love the use of double-spreads because to me it feels like the stretching of a moment aka time slows down and you can just take in the scene. <3 Also the "scene in the amulet" is really creepy and spooky and what does it all mean!? /o\ after all this time, i feel we should expect foreshadowing in almost everything. xD 10) Arcein isssss 300 years old according to Pascal so the amulet is.... HAUNTED [or Rebel's Horcrux theory]. Maybe Felix had the amulet before and maybe they spoke together/concocted a plan together. Or maybe they disagreed? I have NO idea what Myosotis is in her context. Googling it, its a forget-me-not sooooo i guess she wants to be remembered? big shrug she seems dangerous. just look at her grin.(edited)

Respheal

nyahahahaha >:D

There is a whole lot of foreshadowing, and I appreciate what Jo said about "details you only notice on reread" xD Because a lot of the foreshadowing, I'm aiming it to be like it was staring us in the face the whole tiiiiiiiiiiiiiime

Jo Michelle

That's the best kind.

Other than the Horcrux thing, I have about zero formed ideas or theories on Arcein myself. That's a whole giant ominous question mark in my mind.

Mahotou

And also the amulet is called Arcein's Ignorance. I believe it was named for how it disconnects an Obligated from The Gale (and thus be Ignorant of the commands) but... Was Arcein Ignorant about something too? I wouldn't put it past Res for double meanings. Did Arcein do something Ignorant by making this amulet?

Kabocha

People are ignorant of Arcein, therefore her price of "Forget-Me-Not" is... to make her known? Remembered? avenged?

Sarai

((Forget-me-nots also mean true love, so make of that what you will))

Jo Michelle

What if the amulet was made by a Magician and a Noble who loved each other, and wanted a way to have a relationship that was free from Obligations?

Kabocha

oh That... that could have happened in this world...

Mahotou

i like that sound O:

Sarai

As far as what the "price" is, maybe Arcien's broken the seal that's locked away conan's memories?

Not so that they'll come back all at once, but she's triggered a sort of chain reaction so that very soon, he's gonna start remembering things

RebelVampire

QUESTION 11. What do you think are this particular comic’s strengths? What do you think makes this comic unique? Please elaborate.

QUESTION 12. Where has Felix been for most of Conan’s life? Why do you think he left Conan, and will Conan and Din actually be able to find him? Assuming they do find him, what do you think would even happen?

Sarai

Before I leave for vacation: 11. Worldbuilding is definitely one of Galebound's strengths. The decision to make this a tidally locked planet (and actually develop how that would impact and affect all facets of life) was a really good one, and it really adds a unique flavor to the story. From the color pallete of the outdoor scenes to the inclusion of the dark hour to the plot, it was enough to catch my eye and make me want to know more my first time reading. -bows to Res-

Respheal

:'D

will Conan and Din actually be able to find him

It's also a question of if half of that set even wants to find him

Jo Michelle

Con: he's my dad and I don't care. Din: He's my No. 1 target.

Kabocha

Galebound's strengths... Well, the sheer growth it's had from its start. Both in art and storytelling... While I know the story was prepping for its first WHAM moment, the art really caught up with it in a way that helped amplify that imo. Res has improved an incredible amount in a comparatively short amount of time

...I'm absolutely terrified to see how much the art will grow in 5 years, especially as the story intensifies. I get the feelin' a storm's brewing... And it's not the Gale.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 13. What are you most looking forward to in the comic? Also, do you have any final thoughts to share overall?

QUESTION 14. What aspect of the Obligation system in the story do you find the most interesting? What about it specifically interests you? Alternatively, what horrible implications are you hoping to see or not see regarding it?

RebelVampire

11) I think the strengths lie in the question and answer formula. While there are a lot of comics out there, in my experience not all of them offer good material for theorizing. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but can make for dull convos when talking about the comic elsewhere. Meanwhile, Galebound has tons of questions, tons of info spread out in various places, etc. So you get to get out the magnifying glass and look around for the answer. 12) I sincerely believe Felix left for Conan's own good to help him with something. Not that I think Felix is altruistically out to save the world or anything for sure, but I do think Felix would want to save his son. As for whether Conan and Din finding, honestly, I think it's more likely Felix will find them first XD We've established Din isn't great at the plans so Din is gonna bump into Felix when he least expects it. And be like "I'm in my underwear right now I'm not even ready for this."

keii4ii

13/14 I'm looking forward to meeting that one character SPOILER who is both a Noble and a magician, aka Person Doomed To Juggle Chainsaws For Life END SPOILER

RebelVampire

13) I am looking forward to people reading the next chapter so the galebound fandom collective can gasp in the same way that patrons get to gasp. 14) my favorite aspect of the obligation system is just the fact that it plays on language and contains loopholes. so you can constantly find new ways to use and abuse it based on how something is worded or how far you push the system. cause that gives it a good balance of being powerful but still being bounded by consistent rules.

Respheal

Oh yeah, the next chapter's gonna be all sorts of fun xD(edited)

Kabocha

The obligation system is certainly easily manipulated for anyone who might be looking For loopholes. Din is dangerous because he was taught to think >:D

RebelVampire

"Din is dangerous" is a complete sentence.

Kabocha

FAIR.

For every time Din subverts an obligation's expectations, he also manages to hurt someone he cares about.

RebelVampire

good job, din. this is why everyone loves you.

Jo Michelle

Mostly to himself and to people who care about him, I think.(edited)

Kabocha

Today I learned: Everyone in Din's life is a masochist(edited)

Respheal

For putting up with him?

Kabocha

Yeeeeeeeep.

Respheal

I almost feel like I need to come to his defense now

I certainly don't condone his actions, but......boy needs an adult

And by adult I mean therapist

Kabocha

He won't get better if nobody gives him good consequences

At the very least, the Ocean could have been like, "Oh hey, KNOCK IT OFF" and smacked him

RebelVampire

tbf even with good consequences theres no gurantee.

Kabocha

Fair! I mean, let's imagine the Galebound discord is right, and Lenora (the King's Magician) had a chance to try to set Din right. ...if he's still after his goal of revenge after some grade-A mom-ish intervention, he's not gonna be easily deterred.

And now I'm imagining Din... "My name is Dinigo Montoya... You killed my father. Prepare to die." (Only we can't be sure if Din's father died at Felix's hands....)

RebelVampire

these are excellent points.

to change din, i think he needs to wake up many days in a row and find out his entire life is a lie

Respheal

He lies to everyone else, but doesn't realize he lies to himself, too

Kabocha

I wonder how many lies we'll discover he's told himself over the years.

It's gonna suck! Din had all these good things he threw away in pursuit of revenge... He really can't figure out how to appreciate the things in front of him until they're taken from him.

RebelVampire

the biggest lie he told himself was that his name was din. really he was felix all along

Respheal

That's some next level self-hatred there

Kabocha

Oh no... So, if Din is Felix...

Respheal

I'm assuming he's also actually ten years older

Kabocha

.... ... That makes him ineligible to be the Shadowlord, sadly...

Respheal

Because otherwise.....eek

Oh?

Kabocha

Felix is the creator of the Shadowlord.

Not the Shadowlord itself.

Sarai

13) What am I looking forward to? The answer to all of these questions really XD

There's so much we don't know, and I'm really looking forward to snapping up all the information about the plot and its mysteries as it trickles in

also clawing the tragic backstories out of everyone's cold dead hands

Mahotou

13) I saw a list of character names and chapter names. I"m excited to meet EVERYONE. Get to fall in love with some and get to violently LOATH some. some sweet sweet hatred on fictional character. I agree with Rebel: Meanwhile, Galebound has tons of questions, tons of info spread out in various places, etc. So you get to get out the magnifying glass and look around for the answer. Sweet mind games and investigation. THERES SO MUCH DEPTH I CAN SWIM IN THIS LORE FOREVER. xD

14) Aspects of the Obligation system? Din's sweet mindbending/word-twisting comprehension ability of commands he received. How far can it go? How far DID it go in his loophole finding ability? But also, what can they achieve together? Conan and Din. If they can work together then there's SO MUCH possibility!

Respheal

Hehehehe I've got all the chapter names (and a lot of the character names) in the wiki :3c They are subject to change until they're actually written (I've already merged a couple chapters together), but I like having those up as sort of a teaser(edited)

As with many things, I didn't really realize I was setting up sort of a question/answer format until I got some momentum going, but I really enjoy how that's worked out xD

Mahotou

(They tease me hard)

Respheal

I am looking for a gif to use as my answer to 13 xD But no such luck

So meh I'll just go with chapters: Ch 6, Ch 14, Ch 18 Those have some of the major turning points I'm most looking forward to :3c

And for question 14.....probably one of the more interesting things, from my perspective, is how the system came into being in the first place

-runs back into the spoiler cave-

Mahotou

LORE/ORIGIN STORY

:partypascal:

Sarai

14) the thing I like about the system is how simple it seems, yet how absolutely bone-chillingly horrible it is when you give it a little thought

It really is a wolf in sheep's clothing

Sarai

Like, when it was first introduced my first thought was "wow this is really constricting and an awful lot of angst over a magic system that can't be used that much"

But those implications hit you like a narrative 2 by 4

Respheal

If I manage to get the book published, that's the sorta quote I want on the dust jacket

RebelVampire

Actually I change my answer

I'm most looking forward to Felix

so we can learn hes not awful

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Galebound this week! Please also give a special thank you to Respheal for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Galebound, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: http://www.galebound.com/

Respheal’s Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/Respheal

Respheal’s Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/Respheal

Respheal’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/galebound