#like sir who are you
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Idc if my husband and I are on the rockiest of rocks , I am telling him about the boob grab
#beyond the sea#black mirror#s6#spoilers#i’m squealing#like a pig#like ya so called friend tried to finger f!ck me#and he’s so bold to say he’s a better man for her#like sir who are you#that’s my husband 🤨#and I don’t even like the husband but there are lines ya don’t cross
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Crocodile finds a strange stray cat an 11-year old Nico Robin (AU where they met 13 years earlier. Robin's been on the run from the World Government for 3 years. Crocodile's 27 and has not set up base in Alabasta yet)
It seems like I have become possessed. By some sort of demon.
Bonus:
#My art#One Piece#Nico Robin#Sir Crocodile#Y'all the OP brainrot is BAD#According to an SBS Crocodile would absolutely spoil his child rotten if he had one. *We all know how Robin's childhood went*#Scary mofo who does not know how to parent a child but boy does he have the spirit + Child who has never had proper parent in her life#They'd make. An absolute disaster of a duo. This AU concept is so fucking funny to me okay#But also sad because I would fucking die for baby Robin she deserves the fucking world#This poor girl has never been spoiled in her entire life AND NOW PAPADILE IS HERE TO SPOIL HER#You know it's funny. I know 11 yo Robin should LOOK older than 8 year old Robin. But Crocodile is a fucking giant so she's still baby sized#Also I just had too much fun drawing Robin looking as pathetic as humanly possible lmao#She's a like a wet kitten in the rain 😭
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pov your ex held your collection of thrifted spoons hostage for over a year (not entirely his fault, they got mixed up in his things during a move and you did not realize it, though he did adamantly deny that he had them) and reached out to your roommate on instagram nine months post break up after being thoroughly blocked for several months just to ask if you were still roommates and then to very cryptically reveal that he had in fact found the spoons (among other, mystery items that he did not reveal and you also have no idea what they are) in his car that he had not driven for a year cause he decided to make the worst financial decision of his life and buy a tesla and then tried to coordinate a meet up to drop off said spoons and mystery items which you did not want but you do want your spoons so you told him to either mail it or show up to your place of work when you were not scheduled only for him to entirely miss the point and still try to see you, then you reveal that you do not want to see him so he finally says that he will put on his big boy pants and mail it (though him actually mailing it is entirely unlikely) and also aparently hes gotten a perm since the last time you saw him and it looks terrible
#anyone relate? no? just me? sigh#not a tag#from saph#for anyone whos asked oh why did you and brad break up#well you see#^^^^^^^^#you all have my expressed permission to use this as a fanfic plot if you would like please tag me in it i want to see it if you write it#hE HAS ALSO REQUESTED TO FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM AGAIN SIR PLEASE YOU TRIED TO BREAK UP WITH ME OVER TEXT
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HOT, SINGLE, UNSTUDIED SPONGES. 3000 NAUTICAL MILES AWAY. Come sail the distance and read Tiger Tiger!
#tiger tiger#ludovica bonnaire#remy bonnaire#jamis arlesi#This comic has been on my radar for *years* and I only recently - finally - sat down to read it. And by god is it amazing.#I don't want to spoil anything! But if you like amazing art and character writing *and* high seas adventure? READ TIGER TIGER.#If you asked my who my favourite character is I could not tell you. I truly like them all!!!#I even like the sleezeball who has less charm than a dead rat. He's *my* darling little rat man. With every disease.#A special shout out to my lad (he is the lad of all time) Jamis Arlesi.#Who - upon walking into frame makes me go 'Sir! Is your bosom too heavy? Do you need a new bra? My hands are free on Thursdays!'#And Ludo! My lass! I love her dearly! Every page made me more fond of her.#Book smart and uses it in very good ways! Naive enough to think it is all she needs! Learns a lot and stays kind through the horrors!#I could go on and on but...you...the person reading this...you *are* going to read it - aren't you?#So I'd hate to spoil you any more! Go read Tiger Tiger! Do it! For the sea sponges!#Rumour has it they are also freshly divorced. It was messy. Sea sponge needs a distraction. That could be you. Distracting that sponge.#You wont know until you click that link and start reading!
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ok but the amount of people hating on mixed ppl bc of kendrick’s diss like— my brother in christ you are MISSING THE POINT. he’s not hating on drake for being mixed he’s hating on drake for being so insecure about being biracial that he overcompensates and does weird shit like collect hip hop heirlooms and pretend that he’s a gangster rapper just so he can ”appear more black” while still appealing to his white audience
#ppl who are like ’but kendrick sir you are married to a mixed woman ☝🏽🤓’#LIKE YES#THAT��S NOT THE POINT#it’s not about being mixed it’s about being CONFIDENT IN BEING MIXED#.txtpost#kendrick lamar
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Hi I was wondering if you know of any good resources to get good vintage names that aren’t typical and boring (Fred, Edward, Alfred etc)?
Some of the names in the Santa letters are certainly peculiar and it made me wonder what kind of names those “vintage baby names” lists are leaving out 😜
Thanks! And happy new year 🎊
One place to get a good general overview of what names were like in a certain era is the Social Security Administration's lists of popular names that go back to the 1880s. The further down the lists you go the less common they get. However these are still all names that had at least a few hundred occurrences, so you're not going to have any Gloyds etc..
I personally always try to find names from primary sources (newspapers, census, vital records, etc.) as you're more likely to come across unusual names that don't make the top 200 lists.
Also keep in mind that name popularity varied greatly by location. Just because there were a bunch of Juanitas in Tulsa in 1930 doesn't mean there were that many in Boston.
Honestly if anyone is working on a specific project and needs names from a certain location/era (i.e. you're writing a novel that takes place in London in 1627) feel free to message me and I'd be happy to work with you to compile a list from primary sources. I love this stuff and will use any valid excuse to spend an evening digging through 17th century baptismal records.
#if you buy me a coffee I might even make you a simple custom name generator#I do this for myself all the time because I'm a party person who really likes spreadsheets#names#history#historical fiction#writing resources#asks#@sir-sleepalot#writing reference#character names
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Crocodad AU where immidiately after having left Dragon and his baby boy Crocodile finds an 11 year old Robin. And while he's 100% only recruiting her so they can make a beeline for the Poneglyph and Pluton in Alabasta by the two of them... Crocodile accidentally sorta kinda adopts Robin.
At this point Robin's been running for her life from the Government for three years so her deep trust issues and fear of betrayal are starting to take root in her little heart. Like perhaps they haven't taken fully over yet, and being still a child I'm sure Robin might've still had that genuine hope that she could find a safe place to stay in. But I'm sure the though of "what'll he'll do with me once he gets what he wants?" would be nagging at her at the back of her mind. Meanwhile Crocodile's struggling between the pain and hurt he's already gone through and given him his trademark trust issues, as well as the aftermath of The Dragodile Divorce. But he also has his Fresh Paternal Instincts and probably misses his baby. So when given a small, scared child who is running for her life, being chased by the very same Government that'll want his son dead if they ever find out about him... Yeah that might fuck with your brain a little
You know this post was supposed to be just that first paragraph and just a few footnotes from the following two paragraphs. And then I kept on Having Thoughts. And I kept on writing them down. And oh no what happened when did this post get so long (Look I was going to either kept on writing my Additional Thoughts in the tags or I just put them in the actual fucking post)
Like considder this: based on this one SBS, we can kinda tell that if Crocodile was given a chance to raise a child, that child would be a spoiled little shit, right
So in this scenario, where Crocodile's looking after lil Robin, would he be kind of torn? Unsure how to feel about her?
Because on one hand, this strange child would have the potential to not only ruin his plans, strip him of his Shichibukai Privileges by outing him and his plans to the World Government, but also put his son in grave danger by extension (if she found out about him having been involved with the Revolutionaries and/or having a child). But on the other hand, his paternal instincts could make him want to spoil this poor little girl rotten. But only because he needs to (perhaps literally) buy her trust so she'll behave. No other reason, he doesn't feel sorry for her one bit, no sirree. (But maybe he did feel sorry for her, since his son could very well end up exactly like her. Poor little thing) (Which is why he needs to nuke Marijoa out of orbit as soon as possible, no matter the cost, and this child can't get in the way of Crocodile protecting his son) (But also this is a child. Like how bad could she be. Besides all he really needs to do to win her trust is be nice and make her feel safe, right?)
Of course, while I'm suggesting Crocodile could have some parental instincts, realistically, he hasn't actually spent any time being, you know, a father to a child (looking after his newborn for an unknown though short amount of time aside), so it's possible he wouldn't even know how to parent Robin even if he wanted to, would he? (Like taking care of a newborn and an 11 year old kid aren't the same either) So if he was kind of just emotionally flipflopping between No Trusting Ever and It's Just A Kid for God's Sake, Crocodile trying to be nice to Robin to make her feel safe and then telling himself to stop being so soft and vunerable... Yeah that would make for an absolute mess of a relationship. (Not to mention, let's be real, dude's a scary motherfucker too, and a bloody giant compared to itty bitty baby Robin. He could keep on accidentally scaring the shit out of Robin (who would be On Fucking Edge To Begin With) by just Being Himself. Like for example, can you fucking imagine if he caught Robin trying to cheer herself up with a little "dereshishishi" only to tell her to stop because "it was stupid"? 'Cause I can imagine him doing that, and boy howdy would that make Robin feel bad)
Or who knows, maybe Crocodile was just Born To Be A Dad, maybe he just Fucking Gets It. Like Crocodile is canonically pretty good at manipulating people to do what he wants them to do (see: how he played Vivi like a fiddle), so knowing Robin's position and understanding how she feels, maybe he COULD completely nail how she needed to be treated. Not being too familiar but still making her feel safe and happy, knowing exactly when to be stern and when to spoil her, etc. Dude just goes off and wins the Dad of the Year Award while being a deadbeat dad himself. The only thing Crocodile would have to worry about then would be making sure HE doesn't get too fond of her. And certainly that could never happen, he's so in-touch with his own feelings and so grounded, he's not a softie, get outta here. Or maybe he does but never realizes until it's too late and good luck backpedalling on those emotions now dumbass
Alright so, the reason I went on that whole rmble is just that like. I'm so interested in the relationship Robin and Crocodile already have in canon. I'm so facinated and curious about how the two feel about each other, considdering they did spend 4 whole years of their lives together as criminal business partners, though neither ever trusted the other. A partnership that was only ended because Robin betrayed Crocodile, out of her own trauma. (God, I want to see these two "reunite" so bad, I want to know how they feel about each other now after the timeskip and Robin joining the idiot in flipflops who foiled Croc's plans)
My question here is just that... if they had met 13 years earlier, would things have been different? Especially if Crocodad Real? Because as I mentioned in the begining, Robin would've been on the run for only 3 years by this point, as opposed to 16 years before running into Crocodile. Simultaneously, this would be before Crocodile went onto spend an entire decade all alone, slowly losing his marbles in his emotional solitude. They'd both be emotionally traumatized, yes, but would it have been as bad in this scenario? Like I did start this post kind of joking about Crocodile adopting Robin, and for clarity's sake I don't think they'd have like a father-daughter relationship nececarily. But it would be a strange relationship still, because we'd have two broken people, both struggling to trust anyone. One who had lost her mother and her only friends, leaving her all alone and afraid while running for her life. The other a father who had just given up his son whom he probably missed dearly. Both having these holes in their hearts from loss of family, holes that could not be filled with replacements. But could they find comfort in each other anyway, because they still as people occupy similar roles to their respective loved ones? If they both could just get over those trust issues?
Okay I've been going off on the Emotional Side Of Things for this AU Concept, THERE'S PLOT TOO
So if Crocodile did pick Robin up like 19 years ago, that should be before he set up base in Alabasta, long before he had built is homebase and financial empire etc.
Now the thing is, while we don't know when, where and how Crocodile learned about the Ancient Weapons, Pluton specifically and how the lead on it would be in Alabasta... Considdering Crocodile did once upon a time aim to become Pirate King, it would make perfect sense if he had learned about Poneglyphs during his past adventures, as he would have needed to get the Road Poneglyphs to find One Piece. And while the World Government did bury the truth about why Ohara had been burned down and why Robin had been given her bounty (remember, the WG claimed it was because she had sunken a fleet of battleships, which she had not, it was because she could read the Poneglyphs), considdering this is a Crocodad AU specifically, you could totally make an argument Crocodile could've learned about what actually happened to Ohara from Dragon and co. So, just to make this AU work, you could just assume Crocodile learned about the concept of the Ancient Weapons from Dragon. And who knows, maybe he overheard the truth about why Robin had been given her bounty from Dragon too (maybe Dragon was able to get intel from Garp in secret) or while going to Marijoa himself to attend a Shichibukai meeting or something IDK.
Maybe he learned about Pluton being in Alabasta before finding Robin by accident, and maybe they made a beeline for Alabasta the second Croc recruited Robin. Travelling takes time and the guy would've most likely had to find an Eternal Pose to Alabasta just to get there (also canonically Robin didn't enter the Grand Line until her 20s so they should've met in West Blue probably, since that's where Ohara was) Or maybe Crocodile had to haul Robin around for a few months while looking for That Missing Piece of Information that would lead him to Alabasta. (Imagine the two travelling from like island to island, library to library, Crocodile trying to find that leads while Robin's just so excited about ALL THESE BOOKS (she's helping too with the research) (but to her, research is playtime, so she's just having the time of her life) (Also, notice how Crocodile's Theoretical Child is a fucking loser ass nerd? Yeah Crocodile would encourage Robin reading and studying, surely. And that would be fucking cute))
But like, once they set sail to Alabasta...
Sure, Crocodile could try to do it The Slow Way that we know he tried in canon, building trust and creating his little empire etc. But also, in canon, Crocodile couldn't have jumped into action head first because without Robin, even if he had found the Poneglyph he couldn't have read it and found the location of Pluton. Crocodile choosing to do it the slow way may have been partially because he didn't have much of a choise and it could've felt like the smarter move long-term.
But in this scenario, he already has Robin. Yes, he could do it the slow, secure way.
But what'd be there stopping him from infiltrating Cobra's palace and kidnapping him (in the night, when nobody suspects a thing), demanding Cobra to spill the beans lest Crocodile kills him and/or his pregnant wife* (*Vivi was born 10 months after Luffy so depending on how long it's been between Crocodad leaving Luffy behind and this scenario... Yeah either the wife is there, still pregnant, or there's a newborn Baby Vivi)
Like it'd be a risky move but depending on how ballsy Croc's feeling and how confident he feels in being able to kidnap the king without being noticed... Yeah he could probably do it. And I'm sure he'd have no problem killing Cobra either, if anything it'd be required if he didn't want the Government to find out he was out to find Pluton, and god knows Cobra would tell on Crocodile if left alive. I could see Crocodad being maybe a little iffy about killing Baby Vivi though (it's not like the newborn baby could report him to the WG anyways), but if nothing else, he just needs to be able to pull off the bluff of his life to convince Cobra to do as he's told. And we all know Crocodile's good at convincing people.
The only question is, how would Robin take that?
Watching Crocodile go into Full Murder Mode, hearing him say he'd kill a pregnant woman/a newborn baby if he didn't get what he wanted? Like yeah, I'm sure 11 year old Robin would be fine with that, that wouldn't make any alarm bells go off in her head at all, it'd be fiiiine. IT WOULD NOT BE FINE, SHE'D BE SCARED SHITLESS. That fear of "what will he do with me when he gets what he wants"? Well, Robin may not have found the answer to that question in particular, but she certainly found the answer to the opposite question, and it's not good
So say Cobra, kidnapped (perhaps with Baby Vivi) by Crocodile in the night, guides the two to the Poneglyph under the tombs. Crocodile puts Cobra out of his misery because he's not needed anymore. And he asks Robin to read the Poneglyph for him.
Robin, who has spent the last little while, be it weeks or months with Crocodile, him having become her "guardian", the thing keeping her safe. Crocodile, who has now shown how cold blooded and cruel he can be. Robin, who might be scared out of her mind. Of him.
And the Poneglyph says Pluton, the thing Crocodile wants, isn't there. It's in Wano.
What's she going to do?
EDIT: I wrote a sequel post, enjoy
#Moon posting#OP Meta#Sir Crocodile#Crocodad#Nico Robin#THIS POST WAS AN ACCIDENT. I DON'T KNOW HOW THIS HAPPENED. WHY DID I WRITE THIS. WHAT DEMON POSSESSED ME#I'm sure someone's written this already right#Right#Surely this fanfic already exists#Please tell me it exists#I dunno what to tell you I am not immune to a Juicy AU#Anyway on a more wholesome side of things: Robin accidentally calling Crocodile ''dad'' and he just inhales and swallows his whole cigar#Nearly chockes to death. Gets burns on his throat.#Robin feeling less alienated because of her DF ability because Croc has seen weirder AND is made of sand himself#If anything if they're literally by themselves then Robin being able to literally lend a hand to Croc at any time could be extremely useful#Like. In regular life situations. 'Cause Croc only has one hand. And Robin as many as she wants. Perfect duo.#(Also if they were travelling on like a small ship then it'd probably be built for a Tall Motherfucker like Croc right)#(Robin's ability would just make the ship more accessible to her and Croc would find that independence good)#Robin still gets a codename because Croc can't have anyone realize who she is. Maybe she even wears like a mask or summin' in public#If Crocodile's openly trans and the news of him transitioning recently broke out. Like. No avoiding that convo eh#Baby Robin's like ''...I read in a book once that some reptiles can change sex but I didn't know crocodiles could do it too''#''💦.../Humans/ can't do that normally either''#''Hmmmm. Weird. I don't think being a girl would suit you though'' // ''...I'll take that as a compliment''#I just. I think they could have really cute interactions if they warmed up to each other after a little while#And I'm Extremely Normal about that
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#mine#doctor who#dwedit#doctor who unleashed#david tennant#catherine tate#dw spoilers#ok i got around to watching the dw unleashed episodes and omgggg#mr. dt sir i love you so much#he looks SO OFFENDED when catherine's like 'you were talking too long' lmaooooo
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my man my man
#he’s like an ex who keeps posting to get my attention#sir you have it#faye spills her guts!#charlie bushnell#luke’s cabin#luke castellan
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these are fun
#ok im finally watching DRP2 and Cinder and Wyldfyre's beef is so funny like sir you are (presumably) an adult and bullying a teenager#ive seen some takes that Cinder is a teen which i giggle at bc when i first watched DR i thought he was genuinely like 50. old ass man#go to bed grandpa#i changed my mind tho he must be a youngish adult but hes just kinda fucked up. like yeah Cinder maybe you do need ur beauty sleep#hes grown on me though. who is this DIVA#ninjago#dragons rising#my post#ninjago kai#ninjago lloyd#ninjago harumi#ninjago wyldfyre#ninjago sora#ninjago vania#ninjago arin#ninjago roby#harumi jade#princess harumi#lloyd garmadon#kai smith#kai jiang#princess vania#ninjago cinder#i forgot to tag him oops. its what he deserves#lego ninjago#amelia isn't funny
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Went to apply for a job, midway through I learned that the person hiring is someone I respect very, very much in my field (who I have never spoken to), then saw the application site was closed (How Did I Miss the Deadline for this Really Cool Job!!!!) and then saw that it was the website's fault and that they were taking applications through LinkedIn DM's. So I did the premium trial & sent my reel in, and they told me they're sending it to recruitment/leads and that it's a good reel!!!! And then the person I have respected for years sent me a friend request!
I'm beside myself!!
#Honestly?? I'd love this job but to have this professional who I've really admired for years tell me my reel was good enough#to send forward to people in this company#If they tell me I need more experience or more professional development I won't even be mad!!! I'd be like you know what sir!!!#You sure as Hell Know Better Than I Do!#I legitimately owe so much of my success to what this person very generously provided to students at affordable prices. So much!!#I'm sure the friend request was to prevent me from having to stay on premium to speak with them but STILL!
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i watched the doctor who tv movie (1996) to avoid watching eurovision and why did so many of yall say it was bad that was the most fun ive had watching a film in i dont know when
highlights for me:
• the goo snake
• the master lying about things in insane fashion
• motorcycle right into the tardis void
• the tardis interior like wow what we lost
• truly unethical levels of camp
#hes like the son i always wanted#sir???#you just met that boy#very convincing tactics#doctor who#8th doctor#doctor who 1996#eighth doctor#classic who#back on my bullshit
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Inktobertale Day 3: Coffee
I think Ink's the type of guy to be like "Hmmm, I'll just have a hot vanilla latte... well, now that I think about it, maybe I'll go for the caramel macchiato instead... but a mocha frappe sounds good too... ARGHHH I can't decide!!! You know what, I'll have the whole menu!" and then leaves without paying when he sees how high the bill is.
Inktobertale challenge and Ink belong to Comyet Nightmare belongs to Joku Ccino belongs to Black-Nyako
#doodle#undertale#utmv#undertale au#inktobertale#inktobertale2024#ink sans#ccino sans#nightmare sans#idk how nightmare ended up here tbh#like i saw saw the prompt and i knew that i wanted to draw ink at ccino's cafe#and then nightmare just showed up#like please sir who invited you#how dare you just randomly show up in my drawing :/#also can you tell that i hate drawing backgrounds#sigh#ceci art
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gem appreciation and hermit tours
+ bonus itty bitty xisuma
#hermitcraft#geminitay#smallishbeans#rendog#xisumavoid#mcyt#fanart#gem is such a delightful menace and it's so much fun#also i really like how rendog literally actually has dog ears on his avatar#thank you sir that rules#i totally respect folks who would rather have just normal human avatars#i just think extra features are fun to draw and it's rad when someone is like “yes this is explicitly something i think is neat”#wandering mask art
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So I’m watching a video of Coalecroux moments, and it included a few scenes from the live shows. And I’m eating while watching, and it’s fine for the most part.
And then it got to the scene where Kremy was retelling a joke that Gideon told a while back. For those unfamiliar (like I was), the joke roughly goes;
“What’s the difference between three cocks and a joke? Kremy can’t take a joke”
Which that in of itself made me laugh, but then I made a mistake of taking a bite when Richie, in Kremy’s voice, said “That’s true”, and I fucking choked on my food when Andy paused, turned to Richie, moved his sunglasses down, and looked at him with such a “what the FUCK did you just say?” Look. And the camera zooming out to show Mikey and Derek giving Richie the exact same look was just the fucking Cherry on top.
How did I not know about how unhinged Richie is in these live shows, I was screaming with laughter from these few clips omg.
#also for those who don’t get the ‘Kremy can’t take a joke’ joke#he’s saying that Kremy can’t take a joke but he can take someone’s dick#(as in sex)#and the fact that Kremy said that it was Gideon telling the joke has some. interesting connotations.#like sir how do you know that#legends of avantris#once upon a witchlight#ouaw#kremy lecroux#gideon coal#coalecroux
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#Sir for an emotionless being who is supposedly indifferent to other humans why are you touching your lips like that#while staring yearnfully into the soft sunset 🎤 sir stop running away and answer the question SIR 🎤#lbfad#lbfad edit#canglan#lbfadedit#dongfang qingcang#love between fairy and devil#cang lan jue#clj#dylan wang#wang hedi
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