#like not even kidding sometimes i tell a joke to just one friend and he repeats it and everyone laughs
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venoooo · 3 days ago
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457 / Inhun hcs <3
(These r set in nosquidgame!au)
- Inho genuinely thinks Gihun is the single most handsome man alive, and he *adores* admiring his face like it's a work of art (it is).
- Inho usually goes to sleep later than Gihun, but not because he's working or is busy. He purposefully stays awake a little later to have time to admire Gihun sleeping.
- If the games didn't exist, Inho would work as a police detective with Junho and Gihun would own a small business.
- If it hadn't been for the games, I hc their meeting would've been due to Gihun visiting the station to file a report on whatever burglar when he sees Inho. They would lock eyes and the attraction would have been immediate and mutual.
- Inho loves black coffee, Gihun prefers tea.
- Without paranoia, Gihun can sleep anywhere in almost any position, as opposed to his boyfriend, Inho, who suffers from insomnia.
- Though he tries to hide it, Gihun finds Inho's bad jokes hilarious.
- Inho gets cold easily, whilst Gihun is usually warm.
- The first people to know of their relationship were Junho and Jungbae, both on accident.
- Junho really likes Gihun as his BIL, because he can tell Inho's never been happier, and that he's genuinely cared for.
- They like to gamble amongst themselves + they play poker together a lot.
- The winning ratio is about 50 / 50.
- Gihun is a sorer loser than Inho.
- Inho has a surprisingly decent singing voice. Gihun found out about this when, one night, after a couple drinks, Inho performed for him.
- Gihun will sometimes just *remember* that he's actually dating Inho, and that he actually gets to kiss him and- holy shit, *he's dating Inho*.
- Gihun loves spicy food and can handle it well. Inho likes it too, but his tolerance for spice is fairly low.
- At one point in their relationship, Inho seriously considered starting to wear tall hats or even chunkier platforms to match Gihun's height.
- When they kiss, Inho doesn't stand on his tippy toes, Gihun tilts his head downward.
- Inho's greatest loss in life was his wife and kid, the second was Gihun's long hair.
- Inho has several moles on his neck, and Gihun likes to kiss and count them (especially at unfortunate times).
- Inho is very fond of Gayeong, and Gayeong likes him a lot too.
- She (Gayeong) knows Inho as one of his dad's "closest friends", but suspects there's something more to their relationship.
- Neither can cook to save their asses.
- Inho probably knows other languages / codes, and he teaches Gihun a few words so he can call him cute names without anyone noticing.
- Sanguine × Choleric temperament 100%
- Gihun is prone to sudden cramping. Like, they'll be walking and suddenly he'll clutch his ankle, crying in agonizing pain. Inho thinks this is hilarious, but would never laugh in his face for it.
- Their lucky numbers are 6, 7 and 8.
- They like cafe dates a lot.
- Gihun likes to take selfies of themselves a lot, but Inho absolutely despises photos.
- Inho gets easily jealous when Gihun talks to other men, while Gihun get's self-conscious when Inho does the same.
- Both are the "13 in 1 soap" typa guys.
- Gihun's stubble is one of the many things that drive Inho absolutely wild.
NSFW hcs?!?!? 🤯
- Inho has a very high libido. This is a result of being under constant stress and years of repressed urges.
- Gihun was a moderate libido, but won't hesitate to reciprocate as soon as Inho initiates.
- There's nothing more satisfying for Inho than 3+ hour long sessions of *making love*. He greatly enjoys foreplay and loves to drag things out as much as possible. Gihun, on the contrary, gets whiny and desesperate.
- Gihun isn't exactly an inexpressive man, but he sure brings out his most responsive side in bed. He's loud and shameless, and the faces he makes are downright obscene.
- This is one of the main reasons why they can't get touchy outside their home.
- Blowing and eating Gihun out is one of Inho's greatest pleasures.
- When Inho gets home from work, all stressed and tired, the first thing he asks of his boyfriend is to please sit on his face.
- Something they both want but would never admit to each other is Gihun wearing lingerie.
- Gihun has naturally well-sculpted thighs, and Inho just *loves* to fuck them.
- One of the things that can get Gihun off almost instantly is getting spanked.
- He also likes being choked and bittten and having his hair pulled.
- Gihun's cock is particularly sensitive. He'll get all swollen and red with the slightest touches, and he leaks *so much* pre.
- It's not so often that Inho likes to boss Gihun around in bed, but when he does, he'll make an absolute *bitch* out of him. So much that Gihun is shaking and limp for the following days.
- Gihun masturbates often, and more than once has Inho walked in on him.
- Inho wants Gihun to cum on his dick and his dick alone. So if Gihun tries to touch himself, he'll either cuff him or just restrain his wrists.
- This isn't my headcanon, but I read on twt (I think), that Gihun is canonically older than Inho (51 and 49). So Inho will be pounding him and suddenly ask "Does it feel good, hyung?" to an incoherent Gihun.
- They love to fuck in the shower.
- What places have they fucked inside their home? More like what places have they *not*.
- Once Gihun wakes up in the middle of a wet dream, he won't ve able to go back to sleep unless he gets off. This is why Inho has woken up to many pleasant surprises.
- One of the things that get Inho really going is hearing Gihun actually *sob* his name while he pounds him.
- Gihun can't really control his spasms once the pleasure starts building up. This results in several scratches down his boyfriend's back (HE LOVES IT).
- Dacryphilic Inho is real.
- Inho is a traditonal man, his favorite positions are missionary and doggy.
- Gihun's are cowboy / reverse cowboy, front face and g-whiz.
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meowyoi · 7 months ago
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every time i crack a joke in front of cis men and no one laughs i inch closer to committing horrible crimes
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nezuscribe · 3 months ago
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it's that same summer when you're at the gojo summer estate, the one near the sea. you're still teens, long before gojo became arranged!gojo.
your last encounter with gojo was something you brushed off. but gojo couldn't stop thinking about you. you were this puzzle he didn't know how to figure out. this war map that no matter how long he looked at it, none of his past strategies were making sense.
but the two of you go about your usual routine. he's with his friends, and you stick to yourself.
or at least you tried to.
gojo's mother, the lady of the gojo family, was an earnest and strict woman. everybody knew that she wasn't one for games or jokes. she rarely smiled and rarely, rarely, laughed. you, along with all the other kids, knew to bow extra low whenever greeting her. she seemed to carry more power than her husband, but she didn't seem to find an issue with that.
but for a woman who was so keen on tradition, she seemed to care about you a lot more than the other children.
when she spoke to you, her eyes softened. her voice was gentler, more caring. your sisters especially grew annoyed at this, trying to butter up to her even more, but she seemed to harbor this sort of kindness only towards you.
you didn't question this either. it must be some form of pity, but you appreciated it nonetheless. sometimes you pretended like she was your actual mom, but then you quickly shook that thought away, chiding yourself for thinking something so childish.
this sort of gentleness she had with you turned into her trying to include you in things. some days it would be having tea with you when the other adults were having tea somewhere else, or sometimes she'd plan a little dinner with you where you could get dressed up and act like a lady.
tonight, however, she seemed to think that the best way she could include you was to include you in the group of the other kids, a gentle and guiding hand on your protesting back.
"really, i like the library," you insist, but it couldn't be farther from the truth. you had been inside the library for so many hours that you could blink and those high walls filled with books would be seared into your vision.
"nonsense," she tells you, her blue eyes and white hair looking down at your form as she waves it off, "the kids are outside near the fire. they'd be delighted to have you."
you cringe a little bit, wondering if she was just as daft as her son.
but she had found you near the fireplace, trying to stick its warmth as you hunched over yet another book. she decided that enough was enough, you should be out with the other kids.
so you couldn't say much to the woman who was hosting your family to argue, letting her lead you outside the grand patio and into the overbearing fields that led out to the sea, you soon saw the fire crackling away, the sound of laughter filling your ears.
some of the kids who were facing the two of you nudged the other ones to turn around, looks of confusion on their faces as the noblest lady of the land led a quivering you closer to them.
the usual look of caring she had whenever she was with you melted away, turning to something icy as the two of you neared the group. her hand on your back was still present, but you wished that it could somehow push you deep into the ground where you could hide forever.
her eyes looked over the group until they fell on her son, gojo, and narrowed.
everybody's eyes bounced from you over to her.
"there should be room for one more, yes?" she asks, and all the kids quickly nod, moving over on the logs that they had created into makeshift seats as they scrambled to make space for you.
you wondered what it was like to command such respect from people, what it must be like to have people actually listen to you.
she nudges you forward a little bit and you glance up at her one more time, a sort of useless plea as she encourages you to sit down.
you take a deep breath, offering them all an apologetic smile as you slowly sit on a log, your legs cramming together to make yourself seem as small as possible.
you watched as she walked back through the patio, talking to a maid as she motioned over to your group, saying something you couldn't make out, and you looked back to the other kids, the ones you had barely spoken a couple words to, and wince.
"sorry," you say slowly, your hands fidgeting non-stop in your lap as you laugh awkwardly, wishing you could just drop dead.
you can see your sisters seething in the corner, rolling their eyes as they sneer. the other kids nod at you just as tensely, and you wonder how disrespectful it would be if you just went back inside.
you feel a pair of eyes searing in the side of your face, and you look slightly to your right to see gojo staring at you, his eyes slightly squinting, just as his mother did.
you swallow thickly, picking at your nails as you send him a small smile before looking back down at your lap.
you could still feel him looking at you, but you chose to ignore it.
gojo doesn't really know why his mother liked you so much, but he never truly questioned her. she treated you with a tenderness he never saw her treat anybody (aside from him) with. he sometimes saw the two of you sharing tea with each other, other times hearing her laugh whenever you cracked a joke. something unusual for both of you.
his eyes look at your face, taking in the way you duck your head to seem smaller than you are. your eyes avert any contact, teeth gnawing on your already chewed-up lips. gojo looks at your hands, at the way you pick at your nails. he looks at your dress and sees the way the seams are fraying, the initial shape of the dress looking a little bit unfitting on you. almost as if it wasn't made for you specifically. his eyes narrow in more as he pieces it together. the dress is a hand-me-down from your older sister. not because your family couldn't afford a new dress, of course not, but to remind you of your place.
he feels a sting in his chest.
slowly the conversation with the group goes back to usual, the other kids pretending that you weren't there. gojo could feel the arms of one of the girls latched around his, her body pressing into his side as she tried to get closer to him. he wanted to shove her away, but didn't want to make a scene right now.
one of the girl shifted the talk to the topic of couples, talking about how she saw this husband and wife in town the other day who seemed to actually like each other.
one of your sisters, mei, snorts, shaking her head at the idea.
"us girls either marry an old man or a slightly older one," her eyes look over to you, "there's no in-between."
everybody grimaces at that, her other sister, yume, shoving her shoulder roughly at the crude statement.
"what?" mei scoffs, sitting back up as she nudges her chin to you, "she is."
yume gives her a warning look, one that's clearly saying she's saying too much, but mei doesn't seem to care much. everybody stirs, their heads craning with the thrill of gossip.
gojo looks at you and wants to see what you think about all this, but you're so far in your own world that you don't notice the commotion that seems to be directed at you.
mei calls your name, trying to grab your attention, and your head shoots up, brows furrowed to see who needs you.
"right?" she asks, knowing you don't know the answer.
you look around again, wondering if she was just trying to be funny.
"what?" you ask finally.
"you have to marry someone older, yeah?" mei presses, her eyes gleaming as your confusion melts away into one of embarrassment, looking at yume to see if mei was really serious.
of your two sisters, mei was always the mischievous one, if you could even call her cruelty that.
gojo sits up slightly, his brows scrunching up together a little bit at the mention of this. nobody had heard of any marriage offers, especially this early. you were still underage. who...?
you scratch at your neck, heat rising to your cheeks at the sudden attention on you.
"it was just an offer," you say through clenched teeth, shooting mei a look as she just smiles smugly. she knew she'd never have to deal with this.
"who?" one of the guys asks.
"nobody," you say quickly, waving it off as you rub a hand over your face, wondering if you threw yourself on the fire if that would help.
"naoya!" mei says instantly, your eyes widening as she reveals this very secret thing that even your father was trying to keep hushed away. you feel your stomach drop, eyes stinging in embarrassment as gasps echo around the group.
"isn't he...?" one of the girls tries to do the math, seeing how much older he already is.
"i heard he wants children," another girl adds, giving you a look of attempted sympathy but it just looks like a wince, "like, a lot of children."
you shut your eyes, rubbing at your aching forehead. you look briefly at gojo, only to see him looking incredulously at you. he's the only one who doesn't seem to be talking in a shocked or excited tone.
everybody gets excited about a terrible marriage offer when it's not them who have to offer themselves up.
he's studying you, seeming to be the only one who sees the way your chest is heaving, as if you're struggling to breathe. or the glossy look in your eyes, the way you dart them away so nobody can see. gojo looks over at mei, at the way she looks satisfied for delivering her piece of gossip for the night,
at your expense.
he doesn't know why he feels the way he does, or why he drags the girls arm away from him as he stands up, shrugging his coat over his frame as everybody suddenly looks at him.
but he's only looking at you.
"i forgot to give you your blanket from last week." he says simply, his voice heavy and coarse, as if he hadn't used it in a while, "come with me,"
well, he never said he was good at lying.
but he puts a steady arm on your shoulder, helping you stand up as you shoot him a confused look, letting him lead you away as the silence behind you becomes defeating.
you wipe at your nose, sniffling silently as he leads you through the grassy field.
he glances down at you. this is the second time the two of you have been alone, and the first time he's ever seen you on the verge of tears.
"thank you," you murmur thickly, rubbing at your eyes with your palms as you laugh wetly, "she wasn't supposed to say..." you trail off, looking away from him in embarrassment.
gojo guides you up the porch, behind a long marble pillar where the two of you are away from the other's curious stares.
he's never been good at comforting people, but he's never wanted to more than now.
"she's right, though," you say through a stutter, arms crossing at your chest as if that's what gojo was thinking about, "naoya, he-" you can't finish the sentence, the reality of it too heavy for you.
naoya proposed a month ago. a marriage offer for when you turn of age. he was desperate to find a wife, but not too many women were desperate to make him their husband. but your father needed the alliance, and your father's wife needed you away, so they swiftly agreed to it.
gojo's hand still hasn't left your shoulder, and he gives it a small squeeze.
"i'm sorry about this," you motion to yourself, laughing humorleslsy, "i didn't mean to...gods, i just...i don't want to be his w-wife," you admit quietly, shaking your head as you hide your face in your hands, "i-i don't want to have his children."
gojo feels bile rise to his throat at the thought of that.
he's only seen you twice. why does he care so much about what happens to you?
"somebody else will come along," he says in a whisper, and you look at him through your fingers, dropping them to your side as you blink slowly, rubbing at your cheeks.
"no good man wants to marry me," you tell him quietly, without any trace of pity for yourself, something that was simply the truth, "if not naoya, then another variant of him."
gojo leans down slightly to level with you, his lips pressed into a thin line.
you don't know why he's so close, or why he looks more worried for you than anybody else has. you shrug him off of you, trying to collect yourself as you peer through one of the large windows that look inside the estate.
"you can get rid of that blanket," you mutter, eyes darting from the window to his stunning blue ones, ones that make your knees slightly weak, "i was going to knit a new one anyways."
you bid your farewells, nodding lowly at him as you find your way inside.
gojo watches your back, looking back at the group as he runs a hand through his hair, gripping at his white locks in frustration.
he doesn't know what he's feeling. he doesn't know why he wants naoya suddenly dead. he doesn't know why he's not going to listen to what you just asked him to do, or why he wants to hold onto that blanket.
gojo doesn't know why you suddenly infiltrate his every waking moment, or why he needs to see naoya buried alive just so that you wouldn't have to marry him.
he doesn't know the answer to any of these things. but he doesn't know if he wants to.
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lizziesangel · 2 months ago
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RAFE CAMERON ⟢ the language of roses
x FEM!reader ⟢ MASTERLIST
SUMMARY: your entire life rafe had been giving you roses in different colours, but you never knew what he really wanted to say
WORD COUNT: 3956
GENRE: fluff
CONTENT WARNING: english is NOT my first language, soft!rafe cameron, oblivious!reader
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rafe cameron was the kind of kid who never sat still. always running, climbing, jumping off something too high just to prove he could. but there was one thing he always slowed down for: you.
you didn’t know why, back then. it wasn’t like you’d done anything special. you were just the girl who lived two houses down, the one who tagged along on all his adventures because you were good at keeping up. you’d follow him through the woods behind the cameron house, across the sandy dunes near the water, and even onto the roof of the clubhouse his dad had built in their backyard.
but every so often, he’d stop, like he’d remembered something important, and he’d disappear for a minute or two.
the first time it happened, you were seven. you’d been playing hide-and-seek in the cameron yard, and you’d been crouched behind the garden shed for what felt like forever, waiting for him to find you. when he finally did, he was grinning, his hair messy and sticking to his forehead. in his hand was a single yellow rose.
“what’s that for?” you’d asked, wrinkling your nose.
“it’s for you,” he said, holding it out like it was no big deal.
“why?”
he’d shrugged. “just ‘cause. you’re my best friend.”
that became his thing.
when you scraped your knee climbing a tree, rafe handed you a yellow rose from his mom’s garden and said, “it’ll make you feel better.”
when you had to spend a week at your grandparents’ house and came back sulking about missing the beach, there he was with another yellow rose.
“what does it mean?” you’d asked one day, sitting cross-legged on his bed as he sorted through his pokémon cards.
“what?” he asked, not looking up.
“the roses. why do you always give me yellow ones?”
he paused, his hands stilling. “it’s just… you know. the prettiest one i could find.”
“oh.”
he’d gone back to his cards, but you’d stared at the flower on the bedside table, something about it making your chest feel funny.
by the time you were ten, the roses felt like part of your routine. if you had a bad day at school, rafe would show up with one tucked behind his ear, waiting for you at your front door.
“here,” he’d say, handing it over with a grin. “it’s magic. makes everything better.”
“that’s not how magic works,” you’d reply, but you always accepted it anyway.
it wasn’t just the big moments, either. sometimes he gave you roses just because. like when you’d meet him at the playground on a sunny afternoon, or when he’d knock on your window late at night to tell you about a new fort he wanted to build in the woods.
“another one?” you’d tease, twirling the stem between your fingers.
“yep.”
“what’s it for this time?”
“i dunno. just wanted to give it to you.”
you never questioned it. rafe was rafe. the roses were just part of the deal.
but one day, when you were twelve, something changed.
he’d been quiet all afternoon, which wasn’t like him. usually, rafe was the loudest person in the room, always cracking jokes or talking a mile a minute. but that day, as you sat side by side on the dock near his house, he barely said a word.
“what’s up with you?” you asked, nudging him with your elbow.
“nothing,” he muttered, staring at the water.
“you’re lying.”
he looked at you then, his blue eyes serious in a way that made your stomach flip. after a long moment, he reached into his bag and pulled out another yellow rose.
“here,” he said quietly.
you took it, studying his face. “rafe, what’s wrong?”
“nothing,” he said again, but this time, he gave you a small smile. “i just wanted you to have it. that’s all.”
you didn’t push him. instead, you leaned your head against his shoulder, the rose resting in your lap.
“thanks,” you whispered.
“anytime,” he replied.
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by the time you were twelve, the yellow roses were a part of you. a part of him. they showed up in places they didn’t belong—pressed between notebook pages, tucked into old shoeboxes, even wilting in jars on your windowsill. you didn’t really know why you kept them, but you couldn’t throw them away. they were yours.
but then, something changed, again.
it happened on a random summer afternoon. the sun was blazing, and you were sprawled out in the cameron backyard, sipping lemonade while rafe fixed the broken tire swing.
“you’re gonna break your neck,” you called out, watching him balance precariously on the wooden frame.
he rolled his eyes but didn’t answer. rafe never did listen to you when it came to stuff like this.
when he finally hopped down, covered in dirt and grass, he didn’t head straight for the lemonade like you expected. instead, he disappeared into the house without a word.
“what are you doing?” you shouted after him, but he didn’t answer.
a few minutes later, he came back, holding something behind his back.
“close your eyes,” he said, a grin tugging at his lips.
“why?”
“just do it!”
you sighed but obeyed, covering your face with your hands. “this better not be another bug.”
“it’s not,” he promised, laughing. “okay, open.”
when you did, he was standing there with a single white rose.
“what’s this for?” you asked, staring at the delicate petals.
he shrugged, looking almost shy. “just thought you’d like it.”
“but… why white?”
“i dunno,” he said, scratching the back of his neck.
you didn’t know what to say, so you just smiled and took it from him, your fingers brushing against his for half a second. you didn’t notice the way his cheeks turned pink, or the way he stared at you a little too long before turning back to the swing.
that was the first white rose.
after that, the yellow roses didn’t come often anymore. instead, you’d find white ones—on your doorstep, in your locker, or handed over with a casual, “here, this is for you.”
you never asked why.
by the time you were fourteen, white roses were the new normal. rafe had grown taller, his voice deeper, his confidence sharper. but when he gave you roses, he was still the same boy you’d known forever.
“for me?” you asked one day, twirling the stem of yet another white rose.
“who else?” he replied, grinning.
then came your sixteenth birthday. you didn’t expect anything big—just a day at the beach with rafe, like always. but when he showed up at your door, he wasn’t empty-handed.
“what’s this?” you asked, staring at the bouquet of pink roses in his hands.
he shrugged, but his usual confidence was missing. “birthday gift,” he said, thrusting them toward you.
you took them, your heart racing. “they’re… really pretty.”
“yeah, well. so are you.”
the words hung in the air, heavier than they should’ve been. you stared at him, your cheeks burning, and for the first time, you didn’t know what to say.
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by the time you were seventeen, things had changed. it wasn’t just the way you and rafe had grown up—it was the way he’d changed.
you could see it the moment he introduced her—lily, the new girl with the perfect hair and the perfect laugh and the perfect smile. she was everything you weren’t, and you hated how easily rafe seemed to fall for her.
but that wasn’t the worst part.
the worst part was that the roses stopped.
it was a sudden thing. at first, there were other flowers—a bouquet of daisies here, a random tulip there—but never roses. not the yellow ones you’d grown used to, not the white ones or the pink ones that had become a quiet declaration between the two of you. just... no flowers.
at first, you told yourself it didn’t matter. it didn’t. rafe had a girlfriend now.
he didn’t owe you roses anymore.
but you missed them. you missed the thoughtfulness, the friendship, the feeling that, no matter what, you still had a place in his life.
and then the your biggest fear came true—he stopped being your friend altogether.
lily didn’t like how close you and rafe had been. she didn’t want him hanging out with his girl best friend anymore. so rafe, being rafe, did what he always did when he felt cornered: he let go.
you didn’t get it at first. he’d stopped answering your texts, stopped showing up at the usual spots. at school, he’d walk by you without even looking up. you’d sit at lunch, watching him and lily from the other side of the cafeteria, and it made your chest ache in a way you couldn’t explain.
there were no more texts to plan beach trips or late-night talks. no more spontaneous hangouts. nothing.
you tried reaching out once, twice, even three times, but it was always the same—short answers, distant replies, the kind that made it clear he didn’t want to try anymore.
it was too painful. so you stopped trying.
instead, you focused on other things—other people.
it wasn’t like you didn’t have friends, but the friends you had before had always been people who had fallen into your life by default. you had never needed to work for them. they were always there, easy to hold on to. but now, as you walked down the hallway of your high school with a new group of girls—girls who wanted to be your friends, who made an effort to include you, to laugh with you, to spend time with you—you realized something important.
you were learning to let go too.
the girls were different. they were fun and supportive in ways you hadn’t realized you were missing. no one ever told you to back off from their boyfriends. no one ever gave you that uncomfortable look when you were laughing too loudly with one of the guys in the group.
it was easier, in a way. no complications. no unspoken feelings. just fun, carefree friendships.
but you couldn’t help but feel that gnawing ache in your chest whenever you saw rafe and lily together. it was like a quiet reminder that everything between you and him was over.
and then, one day, you saw it.
lily posted a story on instagram—a picture of a vase of flowers. they were bright and pretty, but there was something painfully obvious about them. they weren’t roses.
never roses.
they were daisies. lilies. tulips.
anything but roses.
you looked over at your new group of friends—laughing at something ridiculous, pulling you into their conversation—and for the first time in a long while, you realized something important: you were okay.
no, you weren’t fine. you missed rafe. you missed your best friend. but you weren’t going to stay in the past.
there was a part of you that hoped rafe would realize what he’d lost, that maybe, one day, he’d come back and apologize. but for now, you had other things to focus on.
and maybe that was enough for now.
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but still, you didn’t expect to see rafe cameron waiting for you after school.
the day had been uneventful—just the usual classes, the usual laughs with your friends, the usual reminder in the back of your mind that rafe wasn’t part of your world anymore.
but there he was. leaning against the wall near the parking lot, his hands shoved deep in his pockets, his hair a mess like he’d been running his fingers through it all day.
your first instinct was to ignore him. he hadn’t spoken to you in months. months. he’d chosen lily, chosen her rules, chosen to let go of everything you’d shared.
but something about the way he looked—lost, broken, sad—stopped you.
you stepped closer, hesitant. “rafe?”
his head snapped up, his blue eyes locking onto yours. for a second, he didn’t say anything, just stared at you like he couldn’t believe you were real.
“hey,” he said finally, his voice hoarse.
“what are you doing here?” you asked, your tone sharper than you meant it to be.
he flinched, but he didn’t back down. “i... i needed to see you.”
“why?”
“because—” he broke off, running a hand through his hair. “because i screwed up. and because i didn’t know where else to go.”
you crossed your arms, trying to ignore the way your chest tightened. “what about lily?”
he laughed, but it wasn’t a happy sound. “she’s gone. we broke up.”
“oh.”
you didn’t know what else to say. part of you wanted to walk away, to tell him it wasn’t your problem anymore. but the other part—the bigger part, the one that still cared—couldn’t do it.
“come on,” you said, jerking your head toward your car.
he blinked, surprised. “really?”
“yeah,” you muttered. “let’s go.”
the drive back to your house was quiet, the air between you heavy with things unsaid. when you got home, you led him to your room, just like you always used to.
he sat on the edge of your bed, looking around like he couldn’t believe he was there again. “you changed it,” he said, his voice soft.
“yeah,” you replied, sitting cross-legged on the other side. “it’s been a while.”
he nodded, staring down at his hands. “i’m sorry.”
“for what?”
“for everything. for shutting you out. for choosing her. for being an idiot.”
you didn’t say anything, letting the silence stretch between you.
“i missed you,” he said finally, his voice barely above a whisper.
you looked at him then, really looked at him, and you saw it—the boy you’d grown up with, the one who used to make you laugh until your stomach hurt, the one who always brought you roses.
“i missed you too,” you admitted.
his head snapped up, his eyes filled with something you couldn’t quite name. “yeah?”
“yeah,” you said, smiling faintly. “but you’re still an idiot.”
he laughed, and for a moment, it was like nothing had changed.
you talked for hours, just like you used to. about everything and nothing, about the way life had shifted and the things you’d both been through. it was easy, familiar, like slipping back into an old rhythm.
when he finally stood to leave, you followed him to the door, your heart heavier than you wanted to admit.
“thanks for... for letting me in,” he said, his hand lingering on the doorknob.
“you’re always welcome,” you said softly.
he nodded, gave you one last look, and then he was gone.
when you turned back toward your room, something caught your eye—a splash of color on your bed.
frowning, you walked closer, and your breath caught in your throat.
a single purple rose rested on your pillow.
you picked it up, your fingers trembling as you held it to your chest.
you sank onto the bed, staring at the flower, your mind spinning.
he hadn’t said it, but he didn’t need to. the rose said everything he couldn’t.
and for the first time in a long while, you felt like maybe—just maybe—you and rafe weren’t finished after all.
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by the time you were eighteen, you and rafe had found your way back to each other.
it hadn’t been easy, not at first. there were awkward silences, half-finished sentences, and moments where you both stumbled over how to act around each other. but slowly, the cracks healed. the space between you shrank. and before you knew it, you were best friends again, just like you’d been before everything fell apart.
except now, things were different in a way you couldn’t quite put your finger on. it wasn't different as in your roses changed from yellow to white, it was just... different.
rafe spent more time with you and your friends than he did with his own. he’d show up at your place unannounced, invite himself to girls’ nights, and make himself at home in your little world. your friends loved him—who wouldn’t? he was funny, charming, and could win over just about anyone with a crooked smile and a well-timed joke.
and then there were the roses.
at first, it had felt like slipping back into an old routine. rafe had always given you flowers—yellow for friendship, white for something deeper, pink for gratitude and love. so when he started showing up with four roses every time he saw you, you didn’t think much of it.
a pink rose, soft and sweet. a white rose, pure and delicate. a yellow rose, bright and cheerful. and a dark pink rose, richer, deeper, full of meaning you didn’t quite understand.
“what’s this for?” you’d ask every time, your voice teasing.
“do i need a reason?” he’d reply, smirking as he handed them over.
you’d roll your eyes, tuck them into a vase, and move on.
it wasn’t until one friday night, when rafe wasn’t there, that your friends brought it up.
you were sprawled out on your living room floor with your two best friends, abby and jen, eating popcorn and flipping through magazines. the absence of rafe’s usual presence was noticeable, but you didn’t mention it.
“so,” abby said, sitting up and tossing a kernel into her mouth. “are you and rafe, like... a thing?”
you blinked, startled. “what?”
jen raised an eyebrow. “you and rafe. are you dating?”
you laughed, the sound a little too loud. “no. what? no way. we’re just friends.”
“just friends?” abby repeated, her tone skeptical.
“yes,” you said firmly. “we’ve been best friends since we were kids. that’s all it is.”
jen exchanged a look with abby, then turned back to you. “okay, but... the roses?”
“what about them?”
“he gives you flowers every time he sees you!” abby said, throwing her hands up.
“so? he’s always done that.”
“always?” jen asked, her eyes wide.
“yeah,” you said with a shrug. “since we were six.”
both girls gaped at you like you’d just confessed to a crime.
“you’re telling me,” abby said slowly, “that rafe cameron has been giving you flowers for twelve years, and you’ve never thought it was weird?”
“it’s not weird,” you said defensively. “it’s just... a thing we do. it doesn’t mean anything.”
“it definitely means something,” jen said, crossing her arms. “guys don’t give roses to their best friends for over a decade unless they’re in love with them.”
“he’s not in love with me,” you said, rolling your eyes.
“babe,” abby said, leaning forward. “dark pink roses? those mean, like, admiration and gratitude, but also... y’know. romance.”
you opened your mouth to argue, but the words stuck in your throat.
“and white roses? purity. pink? love. yellow? friendship. he’s literally giving you every part of him in flower form,” jen added.
you stared at them, your mind racing.
“he’s... he’s just being rafe,” you said weakly.
“exactly,” abby said. “and rafe is in love with you.”
their words echoed in your head long after the conversation ended, and when you went to bed that night, your eyes drifted to the vase on your desk.
four roses. pink, white, yellow, dark pink.
you’d never questioned them before. but now, for the first time, you wondered if maybe—just maybe—there was more to them than you’d ever let yourself believe.
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your nineteenth birthday was minutes away, and you were already in bed.
well, technically you were sitting on your bed, legs crossed, scrolling through your phone while waiting for the clock to hit midnight. your hair was twisted into perfect curls, your nose strip was firmly in place, and your face was freshly moisturized—your skincare routine impeccable as always.
you weren’t expecting anything. your friends had already promised to make a big deal out of it tomorrow, and you figured the actual moment of your birthday would pass quietly, just you and your phone and a sleepy smile.
but then you heard the faint scrape of your window.
at first, you froze. was someone trying to break in?
“relax,” came a familiar voice, low and teasing. “it’s just me.”
“rafe?”
you slid off your bed, rushing to the window to find him perched on the ledge, one hand gripping the frame, the other holding something behind his back.
“what are you doing?” you hissed, trying to keep your voice down. “it’s midnight!”
“exactly,” he said, flashing that boyish grin that always got him out of trouble. “happy birthday.”
you blinked, completely thrown off. “you climbed up here for that?”
he shrugged, effortlessly pulling himself through the window and into your room. “you’re worth it.”
“you’re insane.”
“and you’ve got... something on your nose,” he said, his gaze locking onto the strip.
your cheeks flushed. you’d completely forgotten about your skincare situation.
“oh my god, i look ridiculous,” you muttered, turning away from him.
“no, you look... like you,” he said, his voice softer now.
you glanced back at him, narrowing your eyes. “what’s that supposed to mean?”
“it means i like you better like this,” he said simply. “no makeup, no filters, just... you.”
before you could respond, he brought his hand forward, revealing the bouquet he’d been holding.
“here,” he said, holding it out to you.
you stared at it, your heart doing a strange little flip. the roses were beautiful—soft pastel purple, deep dark purple, a single vivid red, and of course, the familiar yellow.
“rafe,” you whispered, taking them from him. “you didn’t have to—”
“yeah, i did,” he cut you off. “you deserve them.”
“rafe...” you started, but the words wouldn’t come.
he shrugged like it was no big deal, but the way he looked at you told you otherwise. “happy birthday,” he said again, his voice soft, his eyes searching yours.
you stared at him, your heart thudding in your chest. the weight of the flowers in your hands, the warmth in his gaze, the fact that he’d climbed through your window just to be the first to see you on your birthday—it was all too much and somehow just enough.
“thank you,” you whispered, your voice unsteady.
he stepped closer, his hand brushing against yours as you clutched the bouquet.
“you’re everything to me, you know that?” he said, the words tumbling out like he couldn’t hold them back any longer.
your heart stopped for a moment, then started again, faster, louder.
“rafe...”
he shook his head, his hands moving to gently frame your face. “you don’t have to say anything. just... can I—?”
he didn’t finish the sentence, but you understood.
“yes,” you breathed, barely able to get the word out.
he leaned in slowly, giving you plenty of time to pull away, but you didn’t. when his lips brushed yours, it was soft at first, tentative, like he was afraid you’d disappear.
but then you kissed him back, and something inside both of you broke free.
the roses slipped from your hands onto the bed, forgotten as you melted into him, your arms winding around his neck, his fingers tangling gently in your curls.
when you finally pulled back, your forehead rested against his, both of you breathing heavily, the world outside your room completely forgotten.
“happy birthday,” he whispered again, his smile so full of affection it made your chest ache.
“best one yet,” you replied, your own smile matching his.
and as he stayed by your side, your head resting on his shoulder, the roses scattered around you, you couldn’t imagine a better way to start a new year of your life.
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and for years, you kept them all—pressed between the pages of your favorite books, tucked into jars on your windowsill, little pieces of rafe that made you feel like the most important person in the world.
because to him, you were.
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rafesangelita · 1 month ago
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…SHERIFF!RAFE X FARMER’S!DAUGHTER!READER AU
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⋆𐙚₊˚🍺⊹♡
SHERIFF!RAFE X FARMER’S!DAUGHTER!READER who spend a lottt of time in the back seat of his cop car. they have an age gap that would raise all kinds of alarm if the people of the small town they resided in ever found out. sheriff!rafe is beefy, his muscles bulging through every shirt he wears. farmer’s!daughter!reader is too busy raising hell all around town in hopes that someone calls the police station so rafe can handcuff her and get her act cleaned up. “you can’t just go actin’ a fool whenever you feel like screwin’ i mean it!” he’s pulling her underwear up her thighs as she lays face down against his leather seats, completely fucked out. “whatever you say, dad.” rafe is groaning at her words as he uncuffs her. “yeah? i oughta’ take you home right now then and let him know about all the trouble you been gettin’ into.”
SHERIFF!RAFE X FARMER’S!DAUGHTER!READER who go on their dates in the next town over so they don’t run the risk of being caught by any locals. farmer’s!daughter!reader who teases rafe all the time, calling him an ‘old man’ and saying he’s a perv for entertaining her antics. “there’s a motel not too far from here.. just ‘sayin.” there’s a hint of a smile playing on her lips, the older man in front of her looking unamused. “you’re suggesting that i take you to a motel and you’re callin’ me a perv? get outta here.” despite his faux disinterest, they end up checking into the said motel for the night, his stomach slapping against her clit as he fucks her into oblivion on the dingy mattress of the cheap room. sheriff!rafe who actually knows farmer’s!daughter!reader’s father very well, both of them going all the way back to their high school days.
SHERIFF!RAFE X FARMER’S!DAUGHTER!READER who can’t stand each other sometimes. rafe is scolding her, telling her that she shouldn’t be wearing those ‘godforsaken’ shorts of hers since it draws a lot of the wrong attention. “you’re just mad because jj maybank is wondering what color panties i have on..” she’s leaning into the window of his cop car, his jaw clenching as he eyed the scruffy looking blonde who stood not too far away, shot gunning hot beers with his friends. “mad at the ‘maybank kid? please, darlin’ he’s a joke.” she’s laughing at his words, getting close to his ear before whispering; “i’m glad you think so, because i’m about to go over there and tell him i’m not wearing any..” that sets rafe off and it isn’t long before he’s slamming jj down against the hood of his car and arresting him for underaged drinking..
SHERIFF!RAFE X FARMER’S!DAUGHTER!READER who are such polar opposites, even they don’t understand how they work together. sheriff!rafe has a rough exterior, seemingly cold, closed off and never smiles, whereas farmer’s!daughter!reader is dancing on tables in bars she shouldn’t even be at, and being a little minx to see how many free drinks she can get out of the regulars. so much so, that rafe started patrolling around town at night so he could stop her from doing something stupid. and of course, without fail, he’s getting a radio call saying there’s been a report of a quote, unquote ‘young woman resisting arrest and assaulting an officer.’ and rafe is arriving onto the scene almost immediately, cursing under his breath when he see’s her being held down by at least four of his men in uniform.
SHERIFF!RAFE X FARMER’S!DAUGHTER!READER who eventually have to get serious with one another, both of them knowing that what they have is anything but casual. sheriff!rafe who doesn’t know how to go about it, so he decides it’s best to just be blunt. “so uhm— what do ‘ya say to moving out of your pop’s and living with me instead?” farmer’s!daughter!reader is staring at him from across the table at their favorite diner. “what?” she’s frozen, holding her knife over her plate of fluffy pancakes. “are you serious?” rafe is nodding as he takes a cigarette out of his pocket, placing it between his lips. “yeah, but this rowdy act of yours needs to stop. m’not gonna have you actin’ reckless if i’m the one taking care of you.” he doesn’t have to tell her twice before she’s nodding, throwing her arms around the grumpy sheriff before pressing kisses to his cheek.
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thinkingofausername · 7 months ago
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imagine being jason todd's friend.
he's big, protective, handy. he's got that messy hair with the streak and he's stupidly sexy when he smiles. god forbid laughs. he's sarcastic and sassy. his sense of humor is so ridiculous sometimes. he's incredibly smart. always ready to act, never holds back. he's loyal. he's incredibly caring, though he shows it in peculiar ways. he'd take a bullet for you any day, do you any favor, though he'll bitch about it for fun. if anyone lays a finger on you? they're gone.
imagine him sprawled on the couch, resting after a mission, dead tired, his voice croaky and rumbly in the best way, his hair messy from the helmet. imagine him fixing his bike, his hands working expertly, wielding tools with ease, some oil on his hands and/or face. imagine him being attentive at all times and putting his hands between your body and the edge of something so you don't bump into it. imagine him doing favors and not even telling you because that's just his way of showing he cares. imagine him being soft with kids and animals, dispersing fears. imagine him referencing books, giving you annotated ones, containing jokes he knew you'd laugh or scoff at.
his life is full of adrenaline, danger and confrontation but he'd never hurt you. it would destroy him if he lashed out. he wouldn't be above resembling a sad puppy if your friendship was at stake. so many of his relationships are shaky, filled with miscommunication and violence - if he had a stable friendship he would NOT allow himself to lose it. even though he'd consider himself a danger and contemplate distancing himself for your good, he doesn't truly want to be alone.
he messes with you all the time but you'd never doubt his respect for you. he'd support you in whatever you pursued.
he leaves the charm and dazzle to dick "pretty boy" grayson but the man is FINE. imagine him leaving the shower with just a towel, his muscles and scars on display. it's questionable whether he's comfortable in his own body but i feel like he's not fully aware of the impact he has.
imagine being his friend and attempting to resist falling in love.
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burytheruby · 2 months ago
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I N A P P R O P I A T E
𐬺𐬽𐬾❤︎︎𐬾𐬽𐬺
IN which Captain Price is your father, and your eyes are set on his lieutenant.
OR: you're down bad for Ghost, and your father isn't too keen on that.
MINORS Do NOT Interact.
Warnings: age gap, fem! reader, ooc, canon divergent tbh, little to no british slang bc i barely know american LOL. written from my phone please bear with me. also, do not get groomed, this is just fiction. WC: 1501
English is my second language, very self indulgent.
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"m'gonna marry him, daddy!" Captain Price used to laugh about that, when your eight-year-old self would cling onto his arm while pointing at the twenty-one-year-old man who had just been recruited. it used to be an inside joke between the unit task, your father was oh so confident that you'd get over your childhood crush.
oh boy was he wrong.
every time without fail, when the squad would gather at your home during their leave, you'd take peeks to the living room, kitchen, or wherever they settled to talk. this ritual continued well into your pre-teenage years, right before you turned moody and too shy to even come out of your room. that's when Price thought it was over, what he didn't expect however was how you'd be so damn adamant on having Simon come over almost daily as soon as you turned eighteen. he was a seasoned captain, he wasn't oblivious to the way you'd eye his lieutenant, how you'd give him the coldest beer when it used to be reserved for him, the way you'd come every now and then and sit right across from The Ghost to "join in the conversation and catch up." nothing escaped his sharp eye, not even the way Ghost would sometimes stare your way for a little too long.
"he's emotionally unavailable, princess." he'd tell you, dropping you off for orientation day at your dream university. "he's a good lad, but he's got his own demons to fight." and he'd sigh as you slammed the car door on him. he could never deny your wishes, though, as he created a woman who was too determined—too set on her track who did not know the word defeat. but you were also just a kid—or at least that's the mental image of you in his head, a little girl with innocent thoughts who simply found his comrade to be cute.
"yer young and beautiful, m'sure those college boys are dying for ye." your father would tell you, almost begging for you to enjoy these years and experiment.
"but i don't want a boy." you would roll your eyes, having started your second year of university certainly made you into a character. you were confident—rightfully so, your beauty outshined anyone else. "i want Simon." you'd repeat like a broken record, and if it didn't make him want to strangle his lieutenant. how has time truly passed, he remembered when you'd call Simon by the name of Ghost, the name everyone used instead of his given name. but you weren't a part of the task force, there wasn't really a reason for you to call him Ghost for reason other than his signature balaclava and stitched-in mask.
you soon turned twenty, you were not a little girl anymore. his team had joined later in the evening to celebrate you, bringing you gifts and sneaked in alcohol for later when your friends would leave. it wasn't until Simon's arrival that you suddenly disappeared, but Price isn't a fool. he clutched the now empty can of beer, stopping immediately as he felt Gaz's reassuring touch on his shoulder. you were not a little girl anymore, you were a woman. he repeated in his head, no longer glancing over at the backyard door as he focused on the conversation between his comrades.
𐬺𐬽𐬾❤︎︎𐬾𐬽𐬺
"thank you, Simon." you smiled as he helped you put the piece of jewelry around your neck. a beautiful necklace of the metal of your liking—the one you always used when you dressed up so pretty, so dolled up. he looked at your face, his mouth in a straight line yet his eyes full of unspoken softness for you. he hummed in response, his gaze falling back down to your neck, where the necklace laid so neatly right under your collarbone, before it touched your cleavage. Simon tore his gaze away, he refused to look at you that way—not to his captain's daughter.
your smile faded as you noticed his lack of eye contact, your hand grazing his calloused one with gentleness. his eyes landed on yours once more, one hand moving the stray hair out of your face as he admired you, how you had grown to be a gorgeous woman. "we can't, love, m'way too old for ye." is what he said to you—to himself, to stop the pounding of his heart and the ache of having you so close to him. you shook your head in rebuttal, the frown of your brows making you more enticing to the man who towered over you with ease. you were determined, and he liked that about you—among the many other things that piqued his interest.
"don't care, Simon, i said i'd marry you." too determined, maybe. he scoffed at your words yet couldn't help it as the ghost of a smile appeared on his usually stoic face. "and i don't care about what old man has to say about it, i'm an adult for christ's sake." you held onto his hand, the one that laid so gently on the curve of your neck, feeling your pulse on his rough fingers. your eyes roamed from his eyes to his cheekbones, the scars on his face that added to his charm, and his slightly chapped lips that seemed to beg to close the gap between you. Simon noticed your lingering eyes, and he cursed under his breath as his fingers squeezed your neck softly.
"eyes up 'ere, love." his voice took you out of trance, eyes quickly darting back up to his as you felt your cheeks burn in embarrassment at being caught. you smiled in response, your own eyes getting lost on his gaze. a deep shade of chestnut, one that conveyed a turmoil of emotions. surely, he couldn't just court his captain's daughter, it's just wrong. no matter what her sweet eyes silently pleaded for, he couldn't just give in—hell, temptation is too strong. rough digits let go of your neck, reaching down to your waist so tenderly that anyone who looked your way would know.
you couldn't help it, not when he always tried to make you happy, to give you everything you deserved, for treating you the way he just did. with a pull of his jacket, your lips clashed passionately, desperately, as if you were to disappear, like a prayer that had been heard, you clung to him with your arms around his shoulders as he held you impossibly close. you sighed between the kiss, pulling at his bottom lip playfully before you returned to the steamy friction of your lips. a want, one Simon hadn't realized how much he needed, how much he craved. you were a woman, one so, so perfect. "so gorgeous," he hummed lowly against you, letting go of reddened, puffy lips. his words sent a shiver down your spine, relishing on his words, the ones that were only for you, always you.
Simon has never been rough with you– he couldn't even imagine being so, not when you're holding onto him like a lifeline, like he's everything you've ever wanted. he doesn't complain when you bring him up to your face again, breaths mixing in the silence of the yard, so silent you have both forgotten of the people inside your home. "Simon," you gasp in a plead, a withheld plea as the backdoor opened. he pulled away from you in an instant, his hand still on your waist protectively.
"everything alright?" Price asked, and you could hear Simon curse under his breath. you just knew your father did it on purpose, he had that mischievous look on his face you had inherited, one you both used when you planned something. his eyes bore on the point of contact between you and his lieutenant, and Simon found himself forced to let go of you with a grumble. Price's eyes fell on the pendant hanging off your neck, letting out a sigh as he closed the door behind him and walked up to you.
"gorgeous pendant, hun." his eyes found their way to his lieutenant on your side, a look on his face that was no longer a warning– but rather a petition (demand, more like) to keep his treasure safe. do not break her heart. you could almost hear his thoughts, shifting under his gaze as you observed the interaction. Simon gave a curt nod, a wordless promise of affection and protection. "you should hurry, s'getting cold." Price said after a moment, giving you a smile before walking back inside.
Simon found your smile endearing, the way it reached your eyes and made your face bright. his hand returned to your side, giving a playful squeeze before making its way to the small of your back once more. "let's go inside, yeah?" he murmured against your ear, and you couldn't help but think of how neatly wrapped you had him around your finger, always getting what you want.
an unforgettable birthday.
𐬺𐬽𐬾❤︎︎𐬾𐬽𐬺
made an entire account just to write this. i will be doing more, trust.
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littlelamy · 4 months ago
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could you do one where rafe and reader have known each other since they were kids. where they played pretend marriage and rafe has always believed it was real even when they were kids and some girl tries to come between that but it doesn’t happen.
love your writing
a/n: thank you so much! I hope you enjoy it! 💗🤍
rafe cameron had always been a part of your life. from the time you were toddlers, running through your backyard with imaginary crowns on your heads, to the moment you both said your pretend vows underneath that old oak tree. you were six, maybe seven, and it had been all fun and games—at least for you. rafe, on the other hand, took the "marriage" very seriously, even as kids. "you're my wife now," he’d say with a grin, tugging you along whenever someone tried to play with you. you always brushed it off as rafe just being rafe.
but now, as you stood at another one of toppers' parties, you noticed something had shifted. maybe it was the way rafe had been more possessive lately, a hand always at your waist, or the way he’d glare at any guy who got too close. then there was jessica—new girl, pretty, and definitely interested in rafe.
“so, are you and rafe, like, together?” she asked you casually one day at school, twirling a strand of hair around her finger. there was something smug in her tone that made your skin crawl.
“we’re just friends,” you said, even though the words felt wrong coming out of your mouth. were you really just friends?
"oh, that’s good to know," jessica had smirked, and you knew she had plans.
tonight, you watched from the corner of the room as she slid up to rafe, placing a hand on his arm and laughing a little too loud at something he said. your stomach twisted, but you told yourself it didn’t matter. you and rafe were just friends—childhood friends with a long history of playing pretend, but that was it. still, your feet started moving before you could stop them, weaving through the crowd toward them.
“hey, rafe,” you called out, slipping into the space between him and jessica like it was the most natural thing in the world. his eyes lit up when he saw you, that same boyish smile he’d always had whenever you were near.
“there you are,” he said, wrapping an arm around your shoulder like it belonged there. and maybe it did.
jessica’s expression faltered for just a second before she plastered on another smile. “oh, hey. i was just telling rafe we should go out sometime. get to know each other better.”
before you could even process her words, rafe chuckled. “yeah, i’m gonna have to pass on that.”
jessica blinked, clearly thrown off. “what? why?”
rafe’s gaze softened as he looked down at you, his hand absentmindedly playing with the ends of your hair. “i’m already married,” he said, his tone light but firm.
you froze, heart pounding. "rafe—"
"we got married when we were seven," he added with a grin, not giving you a chance to finish. "i’ve been off the market since then."
jessica laughed awkwardly, clearly not getting the joke. “wait, you’re serious?”
rafe shrugged, pulling you closer. “dead serious.”
it took everything in you not to laugh at the confused look on jessica’s face, but the truth was, you didn’t know if rafe was actually joking. he looked so calm, so sure of himself, like this was the most natural thing in the world. like he really did believe you were his wife, even now.
“uh, okay. whatever,” jessica muttered, clearly flustered as she backed away, shooting you a look before disappearing into the crowd.
you let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding, looking up at rafe. “what was that?”
he raised an eyebrow. “what was what?”
“you just told her we were married!”
rafe grinned down at you, his blue eyes sparkling. “because we are. or did you forget?”
you couldn’t help but roll your eyes. “rafe, we were kids. that doesn’t count.”
“it counts to me,” he said, his voice softening. “you promised, remember? you said you’d always be mine.”
your heart skipped a beat. “we were pretending.”
“maybe you were,” he shrugged. “but i wasn’t.”
you stared at him, unsure of what to say. all these years, you thought it was just a silly childhood game, something you both would laugh about when you got older. but rafe... he had never stopped believing it.
“rafe…” you started, but he cut you off, stepping closer so that his forehead nearly touched yours.
“you’re mine,” he whispered, his thumb brushing over your cheek. “and i’m yours. it’s always been that way.”
suddenly, the party seemed to fade away, the sounds of people laughing and music blaring becoming a distant hum. all you could focus on was rafe—his words, his touch, the way he looked at you like you were the only person in the world that mattered.
and maybe you were.
taglist: @namelesslosers @princessslutt @averyoceanblvd @iknowdatsrightbih @starkeysprincess @sixrosberg @anamiad00msday @ivysprophecy @wearemadeofstardust0
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tsukumomei · 7 days ago
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—PUPPY LOVE
ft. Sae Itoshi
summary: rin swears the new girl makes “nii chan’s face light up”. sae smiles more, and spends time with her like it’s no big deal. their parents don’t notice, but rin can tell she makes sae happier, even if it’s a little annoying. wc. 2.2k
a/n: just a cute fic I thought of cause of that one additional time of the itoshi brothers “nii chan’s frame of mind”
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Rin didn’t like her at first, not that he did now.
She showed up at the park one day, just standing there with her ball and staring like she wanted to join their game. She didn’t even ask, just yelled, “Pass it to me!” like she owned the place. Her voice cut through the sound of their cleats against the grass. Rin froze mid-step. No one talked to his big brother like that.
To Rin’s surprise, his brother’s gaze fell on her, and Rin could almost see the gears turning in his head.
Nii chan didn’t yell at her. He didn’t tell her to leave. He tilted his head slightly and nudged the ball her way with his foot. Rin frowned.
That was it. The first domino fell.
She wasn’t even good. She ran weird, her kicks were all over the place, and she tripped more than she scored. Rin thought nii chan would get annoyed, but he didn’t. He actually helped her. He showed her how to dribble and even taught her how to do some of the moves Rin was still practicing. It wasn’t fair!
Then there was the rainy day. Rin was sure they’d stay inside—no one played soccer in the mud, not even nii chan. But when Y/N showed up wearing her rain boots and grinning, nii chan grabbed a ball and followed her outside. Rin had no choice but to tag along. They ended up having the messiest, weirdest game of soccer ever, with Y/N sliding in the mud and nii chan actually laughing when she fell.
But what really annoyed Rin was how nii chan acted around her. His face was different. When Y/N was around, he looked... relaxed. And sometimes, he even smiled. Not his usual smirk when he wins, but a real smile.
It wasn’t like nii chan to be this way. Rin knew his brother better than anyone. Nii chan is the coolest, and he always looks ahead. 
But with Y/N, it was like he slowed down just enough to let her catch up.
One time, Rin saw them sitting under the big tree at the park. Y/N was talking a lot, waving her hands around and laughing, and he just sat there, listening. He didn’t even tell her to stop talking, which was weird because Sae hated when people talked too much.
Even at home, she was there sometimes. She’d come for dinner, and always ended up next to Sae. She’d laugh at nii chan’s jokes and he’d give her the last piece of karaage like it was nothing. 
Their parents didn’t notice, of course. Mom just said it was nice Sae had a “little fan,”and Dad said it was good for Sae to teach someone else; it would “build character.” Rin wanted to tell them they were wrong, but he didn’t know how to explain it. If only they saw what he did.
It wasn’t just about soccer. Y/N wasn’t like the other kids. She wasn’t scared of nii chan, and she didn’t try to impress him like everyone else. She just... acted like he was normal. And somehow, that made nii chan act normal, too.
Rin didn’t understand it fully, but he could tell Y/N was different. She was the only one who could make nii chan stay longer at the park, the only one who could get him to drop his guard. And as much as Rin hated to admit it, there was something kind of cool about that.
By the end of the summer, Rin still didn’t like how much time they spent with each other. 
But even if it was annoying, it wasn’t so bad to see nii chan smile.
Rin is eight now, and Sae is ten, and it was Valentine’s Day—the most annoying day of the year, at least to Rin.
When Sae opened his locker, chocolates and notes spilled out onto the floor. Rin, walking past with his own bag of books, stopped and stared. Even Sae’s friends, who were standing nearby, froze in surprise.
“Whoa! Sae, look at all this!” one of his friends said, picking up a pink heart-shaped box. “You’re like an idol or something.”
Rin looked around the hallway, noticing a group of girls peeking around the corner, giggling as they watched Sae. Rin rolled his eyes.
Sae didn’t seem impressed. He sighed, crouched down, and began scooping up the fallen chocolates. “You guys can take them if you want,” he said calmly. “I don’t really care.”
His friends’ jaws dropped. “Are you serious?” one of them asked, already reaching for a fancy-looking box. Sae shrugged.
“Yeah. Take them. I don’t eat sweets much anyway.”
Rin couldn’t believe it. “Nii-chan, you’re just giving them away?”
Sae gave Rin one of his usual unreadable looks. “What am I supposed to do with them? Keep them all? It’s just chocolate, Rin.”
Rin huffed, muttering under his breath. He might’ve been little, but he knew enough to tell that those chocolates weren’t just “chocolates.” The girls liked nii chan. They liked him liked him.
Later, when they got home, Rin peeked into Sae’s bag to see if he’d kept any of the chocolates. Sure enough, there was one. A small, simple box with a handwritten note tied to it.
“Why’d you keep that one?” Rin asked, pointing at it.
Sae looked up from his homework and shrugged. “She gave it to me in person,” he said. “It’d be rude to give it away.”
Rin squinted at him. Something about the way Sae said it made Rin feel like there was more to the story.
The next day, Rin noticed Y/N sitting on the stairs near the school courtyard, looking sad. She had her hands covering her knees, and her head was bowed. Rin frowned. Usually, she was cheerful and full of energy, but today, she just sat there, not even looking up when people passed by.
Sae noticed too. Rin could tell because instead of heading to class like he normally did, Sae turned and walked straight over to her. Rin followed, curious but pretending he didn’t care.
“What happened?” Sae asked, his voice calm but steady.
Y/N glanced up, her eyes a little watery, and gave a sheepish smile. “Nothing, I’m fine.”
Sae crouched slightly, his gaze dropping to where she was holding her knee. “Doesn’t look fine,” he said.
Rin leaned closer and noticed the scrape on her knee, smeared with a little blood. Her other leg looked bruised, too. 
Y/N sighed, looking embarrassed. “I tripped on the stairs earlier. It was so dumb. I wasn’t even running or anything. I just... fell.”
“Can you walk?” Sae asked.
Y/N shifted and winced as she tried to stand. “Not really,” she admitted, sitting back down. “My legs hurt.”
Without a word, Sae turned around and crouched in front of her.
“What are you doing?” Y/N asked, confused.
“Get on,” Sae said simply.
“What?”
“I’ll carry you to the nurse’s office,” he said, glancing over his shoulder. “Hurry up before we’re late.”
Y/N hesitated, looking unsure. “You don’t have to—”
“Just get on,” Sae said again, his tone leaving no room for argument.
Blushing slightly, Y/N carefully climbed onto his back, wrapping her arms loosely around his neck. Rin’s eyes went wide.
“Nii-chan, are you serious?!” Rin asked, sounding both shocked and annoyed.
“Do you see anyone else helping her?” Sae shot back, standing up effortlessly with Y/N on his back.
Rin scowled but didn’t say anything. He followed them as Sae started walking toward the nurse’s office, Y/N leaning her head against his shoulder.
“Thanks, Sae,” Y/N said softly.
“Don’t mention it,” Sae replied, his voice steady.
Rin trailed behind, muttering under his breath. “She’s so dramatic. It’s just a scrape. I fell yesterday, and no one carried me anywhere.”
But as he watched Sae carry Y/N, his brother calm as ever while Y/N’s face slowly brightened, Rin couldn’t help but feel a little jealous.
“Why does Nii-chan always go out of his way for her?” Rin thought, kicking a pebble on the ground.
By the time they got to the nurse’s office, Y/N was smiling again. Rin sighed, knowing that no matter how much it annoyed him, Sae was going to keep looking out for her.
Sae, as usual, looked calm, but Rin caught the faintest smile on his brother’s face.
Later, as they were heading home, Rin couldn’t help but ask, “Nii-chan, do you like her?”
Sae glanced at him, his face unreadable as always. “What do you mean?”
“You kept her chocolate,” Rin pointed out. “And you carried her to the nurse’s office. You don’t do that for anyone else.”
Sae didn’t answer right away. After a moment, he just said, “She’s different.”
Rin was still in elementary school, but Sae and Y/N were now in middle school. Even though they didn’t go to school together anymore, things hadn’t changed too much. Sae still came home every day, and most of the time, he’d be in a good mood. Rin liked it when Nii-chan was like that because it meant he’d play with him, and Sae would even show him new tricks.
But one day, everything felt... different.
Sae came home later than usual, and when Rin saw him walk through the door, he noticed right away that something was wrong. Sae didn’t say much during dinner, and when Rin asked if they could play soccer, Sae just shook his head.
“Maybe later,” he muttered.
Rin frowned. Nii-chan never said no to soccer.
Later that evening, Rin found Sae sitting on the steps outside their house, staring at the ground. Rin hesitated for a moment before walking over and sitting down beside him.
He let out a small sigh, his gaze still fixed on the ground. Finally, he said, “Y/N’s moving abroad.”
Rin blinked, confused. “What? Why?”
“Her dad’s job,” Sae replied. His voice was flat, but Rin could tell he was upset.
Rin tilted his head, trying to process it. “So... she’s leaving? For how long?”
Sae shrugged. “Probably a few years.”
“A few years?!” Rin’s eyes widened. “That’s forever!”
Sae didn’t respond.
Rin thought for a moment, then asked, “Did she tell you today?”
“Yeah.”
“What did you say?”
“I told her I’d miss her,” Sae admitted quietly.
Rin stared at him, stunned. It wasn’t like Nii-chan to say stuff like that. He was usually so calm and serious, never letting his emotions show.
“She said she’d miss me too,” Sae added after a moment.
Rin watched his brother’s face closely. Sae didn’t look like he was about to cry or anything, but there was something about the way he sat that made Rin feel uncomfortable.
“What are you gonna do?” Rin asked.
Sae glanced at him. “What can I do? She’s leaving, Rin. I can’t stop her.”
Rin thought about that for a moment. He didn’t like Y/N as much as Sae did—she was always stealing Sae’s attention, after all—but even Rin couldn’t imagine her not being around anymore.
The next day, Rin decided to follow Sae to the park after school, where he knew Sae and Y/N usually met up. He stayed hidden behind a tree, watching as they sat on their usual bench.
Y/N was holding a small notebook, and she handed it to Sae with a shy smile. “I made this for you,” she said.
Sae opened the notebook, flipping through the pages. It was filled with little doodles, notes, and memories of their time together—funny moments, inside jokes, and even some pictures she’d drawn of their soccer games.
“It’s so you don’t forget me,” Y/N said softly.
“I won’t forget you,” Sae replied, his voice steady but quiet.
They talked for a while, and even though Rin couldn’t hear everything, he could tell it was important. When Y/N finally got up to leave, Sae stood too. They said goodbye, and Y/N walked away, turning back once to wave.
That night, Sae was still quiet, but he seemed a little better. Rin sat next to him again, this time holding their soccer ball.
“She gave you something, huh?” Rin asked, glancing at the notebook on the table.
“Yeah.”
“Are you gonna write back to her?”
“Maybe,” Sae said.
Rin stared at him for a moment before nudging him with the ball. “Wanna play?”
Sae looked at him, and for the first time that day, he gave a small smile. “Yeah. Let’s go.”
Even though Rin still didn’t fully understand everything, he decided not to ask any more questions. If playing soccer could make Nii-chan feel a little better, then that was enough for him.
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bats-and-the-birds · 6 months ago
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I made a post involving young/feral/perceived cryptid Dick Grayson and someone tagged something about Barry Allen losing his mind when this terrifying child befriends his nephew and I have NOT stopped thinking about this since.
Because like, imagine you're Barry Allen. You've been doing this hero thing for a while, and you've seen a lot of things, but now your nephew has gotten himself wrapped up in this too, and goddamnit, you're worried because you know this life isn't easy.
Then he makes a friend - Ollie's boy, Roy Harper - and you breathe a little bit easier, because you know that however rough this life is, it's worse without friends. Besides, it's sweet. They're young boys, and they roughhouse, and tell stupid jokes, and play video games together sometimes. It's nice to see Wally just be a kid with someone that he doesn't have to hide from. And, yeah, sure, they get into trouble sometimes, pull pranks that go too far, get themselves in danger because they think they can take on something they can't, but it's still a net positive, because you need friends in this line of work, and that's exactly what they've found.
And you think about Robin. Not often, but you do think about him. Because you know nothing about him, and you don't want to, but he still has the face of a boy that's younger than your nephew. You wonder if he has friends.
But really, you don't think about him that much. You don't want to. He's freaky, and generally, thinking too hard about anything to do with the Bat is inadvisable.
Then there's a fight. A big one. You don't even really know who's fighting on your side until everything has cleared. It was basically the entire Justice League, no one dead, but a few injuried. And your nephew's there too. And Roy. And Robin.
No one really goes near Robin, ever. It was an unspoken rule, of sorts, and you're pretty sure it's just because everyone's scared of messing with Batman's little bird, though whether that was due to fear of Batman or the bird himself, you're not sure.
But Wally doesn't seem to know this. Wally doesn't seem to care. He runs up to Robin with a big grin on his face and grabs his hand, trying to tug him over to where Roy was patching up some injuries.
You notice that Robin doesn't go with him immediately. In fact, he looks confused. But if you know anything about your nephew, he's persistent, and eventually Robin lets himself be dragged over. Roy seems unconcerned, but you can tell that the other adults in the vicinity shift uncomfortably, unsure of what they should do, or if they should do anything at all.
It doesn't last long anyway. Batman calls for Robin and he bounds off, but you notice he stops and hesitantly waves a gloved hand at your nephew before he leaves. Wally waves back.
You don't think much of it.
Then, the next time you and Ollie catch Wally and Roy fighting something they shouldn't be, Robin's right there with them. It's the first time you've seen Robin without Batman in close proximity, and you think he looks just a little bit more human. He smiles sheepishly with the other boys when they're chastised for fighting things that they shouldn't, and you watch Roy ruffle his hair like there's nothing to be worried about. You're still worried.
You still don't think much of it though. Even when Robin's there with the two of them the next time, and the time after that.
But then, oh dear god, he's in your house. You don't actually notice him at first, for two whole hours, because it's normal to see Wally and Roy sitting on the couch and playing video games. You just don't realize that there's a third head in between them until you sit down in an adjacent armchair to see what they're playing, because Robin is just short enough that his head doesn't peak over the back of the couch.
You have to blink a few times to make sure what you're seeing is real, because nestled in between the two slightly older heroes in their civilian attire is Robin, sans his gloves, cape, and boots, but otherwise still in full uniform with his mask still firmly in place, holding a video game controller and laughing while Wally elbows his side to try to make him lose.
And you just sit back in your chair and stare, because what the hell are you even supposed to do in this situation? Your nephew has decided to make friends with Batman's goddamn son - the boy that you've seen sneak up on League members with super hearing, break a grown man's femur, and somehow fade into shadows in a bright yellow cape - and it worked. And now he's playing video games on your couch. And you don't know what to do about that.
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pucksandpower · 1 year ago
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Your Friend Steve
Max Verstappen x Reader
Summary: it’s finally me and you, and you and me … just us, and your friend Charles
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r/relationshipadvice
u/yourusername · 9h
My boyfriend (26M) and I (22F) cannot get a second alone!
The two of us have been together for a few years now. We met through mutual friends and really hit it off. He’s caring, thoughtful, and we have the best time together.
The issue is ... his best friend (26M) is ALWAYS around. And I mean always. We’ll be out to dinner and bestie will show up and pull up a chair. We’ll be cuddling on the couch watching Netflix and he’ll let himself in with the spare key and wedge between us. I swear this guy is like an overeager puppy sometimes.
The other day I came home with my boyfriend and bestie was there ... sleeping on MY side of the bed because he “got lonely” at his place. And don’t get me started on trying to plan a vacation for just the two of us. Without fail, bestie always finds out where we are and shows up.
I’m happy they’re so close and I’d never want to get between them or ask my boyfriend to pick. But his best friend is starting to feel like a third wheel in our relationship. I jokingly said to my boyfriend that at this rate, bestie will be part of our engagement and marriage too!
I could really use some outside advice. How do I kindly set some boundaries with my boyfriend’s overly-attached best friend? I want all of us to still be friends but the constant third-wheeling is getting to be a bit much.
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u/relationshipguru123 · 8h
Wow, this sounds really annoying and awkward! Hate to say it but your boyfriend needs to step up and set some better boundaries with his friend. As close as they may be, it’s not ok for him to let his friend crash your alone time constantly. It’s disrespectful to you and your relationship. If your bf won’t address it, you’ll have to be the “bad guy” and talk to the friend directly to give him a reality check.
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u/NeedMoreSpace · 7h
I feel you, OP! My sister deals with this with her husband’s best friend too. They even joked that the friend would be IN the delivery room when they have kids one day 😳 She finally sat down with her husband and told him that while she cares about the friend, she needs some lines drawn for their marriage’s sake. Maybe suggest setting one or two date nights a week that are just for you two? And no dropping in unannounced! Compromise is key.
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u/BFFboundaries · 5h
This behavior would drive me CRAZY! You need to put your foot down with your bf and tell him his friend’s constant presence is affecting your relationship. Then talk to the friend together to make it clear you just need some alone time as a couple sometimes. If they don’t respect reasonable space, it will breed resentment.
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r/relationships
u/DutchLion · 5h
Help! My best friend (26M) is cockblocking me without even realizing it!
I (26M) have been together with my girlfriend (22F) for a few years. She’s awesome — fun, hilarious, and crazy sexy. She puts up with my quirks and even likes watching sports with me. Absolute keeper!
The problem is, my best friend has NO boundaries. I love him like a brother but he has zero concept of personal space or alone time.
Just last night, my girl and I were enjoying some long overdue freaky time together, when who bursts through the bedroom door unannounced? Yep, my best friend. Turns out he “accidentally” made copies of my keys ages ago.
Before I can react, he’s jumped onto the bed between us asking what we’re up to. My girlfriend was mortified and hurried to cover up. There went the mood for the rest of the night thanks to Captain Cockblock!
That’s just the latest in a long string of intrusions. Double dates, surprise sleepovers in OUR bed, you name it. I’m going to have to lock down the apartment Fort Knox style to get any intimacy!
Don’t get me wrong, I would take a bullet for my best friend. But how do I politely tell him that constant third-wheeling is killing my game and giving me the most painful blue balls known to man? Is there a tactful way to set some boundaries so we BOTH stay sane and satisfied?
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u/CantUnseeThat · 4h
Dude, I felt awkward just READING this! Major props to your girlfriend for being so chill. You gotta have a talk with your boy and set some hard lines. A real best friend would respect that your relationship needs privacy too.
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u/Locks4aReason · 3h
Your friend needs better boundaries yesterday. Sit him down, tell him you get he’s lonely but he can’t just walk in whenever, especially when sexy times are happening! Maybe suggest setting him up on some dates so he finds fulfillments elsewhere.
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u/needabroboundary · 3h
As much as you love your best friend, your personal life with your lady should be a priority over letting him run wild! Have a man-to-man talk and make it clear you just need some couple time a few days a week. Offer to schedule some designated bro time to keep that bond too. Gotta compromise.
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u/needspace321 · 2h
Don’t feel bad about setting some hard boundaries, even if it bruises his ego at first. True friends will understand. Explain you just need some regular alone time with your gf. Offer a standing weekly bro night to keep the friendship intact too. You need to have that balance!
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r/AmItheAsshole
u/PrinceOfMonaco · 3h
AITA for wanting to spend time with my best friend and his girlfriend?
Some background — my friend (let’s call him M) and I go way back to childhood. We’re basically as close as brothers. A few years ago he started dating his now serious girlfriend (we’ll call her Y).
Initially, I’ll admit I was worried M would drift away and our bromance would fade. But much to my delight, Y is awesome! She likes the same sports, laughs at my jokes, and comes to watch our competitions. Honestly it feels like I gained a sister!
Naturally, the three of us started hanging out constantly. I know me and M have always valued bro time together. But now Y joins our gaming sessions, I ride along on their date nights often, and I will even crash in their guest room after late nights! It’s been pretty great.
Or so I thought? Lately I’ve noticed them acting strange and tense around me. They barely react when I barge into their room or surprise them by their cars after work. Sometimes they pretend to be “busy” if I try making plans last minute.
I can’t figure out why though? Just the other day, I popped by to say hi only to have M rather sternly tell me I should “call before visiting from now on.” And I could swear I heard Y whisper about needing “boundaries” … whatever that means!
I’m starting to feel hurt they suddenly seem fed up with me! AITA here? Am I missing something? Someone help me decode these mixed signals!
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u/needboundaries101 · 3h
YTA. I know you value your friendship but your total lack of boundaries is overbearing. Your friend is trying to set reasonable limits without damaging the friendship but you’re oblivious to all hints. Surprising them and inviting yourself along all the time is inconsiderate. Give them space!
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u/respectrelationships · 3h
Soft YTA. I get you cherish the bromance and her friendship too. But constantly crashing date nights, unannounced visits, etc is cockblocking to the max! They likely feel too awkward to bluntly tell you that they need alone time too sometimes. Tone down the clinginess before you do permanent damage!
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u/flying_solo · 2h
NAH but only because you seem genuinely unaware your behavior is an issue! Most people would have picked up on the hints by now. You should DEFINITELY be calling ahead before visits or tagging along to closed plans. Give them a chance to say no thanks. Gotta let your bro spread his wings too.
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u/threesacrowd · 2h
YTA. You would lose your mind if your best friend was this invasive during your dates! When they make excuses or leave early, that’s NOT an invitation to join them unasked and uninvited next time! They’re just too polite to be harsh so I’ll spell it out — you have to give them personal alone time without taking offense.
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charles_leclerc
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Liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername, and 1,273,948 others
charles_leclerc happy third anniversary to my favorite couple ❤️
View all 3,085 comments
maxverstappen1 thanks, mate!
charles_leclerc i’m going to pick up some dinner from that italian place we all like and i should be at your place in around 20 minutes
yourusername we really appreciate that, charlie. but you know … it’s our anniversary and we would like to celebrate alone
charles_leclerc i totally understand! that’s why i’m taking the food to go so we can celebrate alone with just the three of us
maxverstappen1 yeah but we want to ✨celebrate✨ you get me?
charles_leclerc you want me to stop and buy some sparklers?
yourusername what we’re trying to say is that we want to celebrate … in bed
charles_leclerc even better! your mattress is so comfortable and we can put some netflix on while we have a sleepover together
landonorris they’re literally spelling it out for you in black and white 💀
pierregasly mon ami, they’re trying to say they need some adult time tonight 😏 maybe skip the visit this once
danielricciardo how do i say this nicely … max and y/n are clearly desperate for uh, anniversary cuddles without you as the little spoon!
lewishamilton someone rescue my man charles from himself before it’s too late. praying the two lovebirds to get to celebrate properly tonight 😉
charles_leclerc of course we will all celebrate properly! i have champagne
roscoelovescoco read’s the room’s 🙄
f1wagupdates i can’t tell if charles is trolling them or if he genuinely doesn’t get it 😭
charles_leclerc what is there to get?
yourusername i give up 🤦‍♀️
yourusername … what flavor popcorn do you want for our sleepover?
charles_leclerc white cheddar, please!
3K notes · View notes
saythenametotheworld · 4 months ago
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Backburner | k.mg (18+)
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There is a rule of thumb for casual relationships: do not fall in love with the other. Yet with Mingyu, it felt easier to watch the world burn than to stop yourself from falling for him.
one | two | three | four | five
Genre: friends with benefits, smut Pairing: Kim Mingyu x afab!Reader Warnings: angst, explicit content (18+) Notes: 21k words. Part 2 of the Heartbreak Hotel series, but can be read as a standalone fic. Listening to Backburner by NIKI. Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know them personally and do not claim they would ever behave like they were portrayed in this story.
Playlist: Backburner by NIKI, Say Don't Go by Taylor Swift, Another You (Another Way) by Against the Current Taglist: @scoupsjin @iarayara @gaslysainz @silvermist002 @ssmebody @katfaceu
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It was midnight, and what was usually a quiet evening was shattered by the persistent ringing of your phone—tucked inside the drawer of your nightstand. You shifted from your comfortable position on the bed, laying on your back to stare at the ceiling, your ringtone still playing and making the nightstand buzz faintly.
“You gotta be kidding me,” you muttered, groaning as you moved to grab your phone. The backlight made your eyes sting. Squinting at the words on the screen, you recognized the unique caller ID: ‘R18+++’ 
One week of nothing and here he comes, calling you in the middle of the night. The audacity.
You shouldn't pick up. You were mad at him after all. But what if he had something important to say? Even if he didn't, would it really hurt if you pick up?
Not you trying to justify the desire to talk to him.
“Hello?” you answered, against your better judgment (or not).
“Hi…” said Mingyu from the other line, his voice more dragged out than usual. Deeper. Lonelier. “Did I wake you?”
He did. “No. Not at all.”
He hummed on the other side. “Can't sleep? What were you thinking about?”
“Nothing important,” you sighed, sinking deeper into your soft pillow. “What’s up with you?”
“Me? I was just working on this paper,” he replied. You could hear him groaning as if he was stretching his limbs. “This course is kicking my ass.”
“Professor Jung?” you asked, remembering how he often complained about the same professor.
“Yeah. He’s the worst,” he chuckled but there was no humor in it. “I’ve been staring at this screen all night, trying to make sense of it. You know when you read the same line over and over, and it still doesn’t click?”
You hummed in acknowledgment, shifting on your bed. “Sounds like every assignment I’ve ever done.”
He let out another laugh, soft and hollow. “Right? This one’s on some theoretical nonsense. I keep typing, hoping something’s gonna make sense eventually, but it’s like... whatever. I’ll probably just wing it.”
You could hear the faint tapping of keys on his end as if he was still half-distracted by the work in front of him. But something felt off, and somehow, you knew exactly what it was. He didn’t really want to talk about the homework, he was just stalling. The words were just filler—something to pass the time, to keep the conversation going.
“Maybe I’ll just email the professor and tell him the universe swallowed my homework. Think he’d buy that?” Mingyu joked and you could hear the smile in his voice.
“Probably not,” you replied with a soft smile of your own, but your mind was elsewhere now, sensing the unspoken heaviness behind his casual complaints.
“Yeah, I thought so,” he chuckled followed by a soft groan and the sound of him falling back on his bed.
Another pause settled between you, and this time you didn’t wait for him to fill it with more empty chatter. “Wanna come over?” you asked instead, and he was quiet for a moment.
“Well… yeah, I’d love to. I mean…” he paused and then chuckled. “If it’s alright.”
You rolled your eyes. Of course, it’s alright. You'd always taken it in stride when he ghosted you and returned like nothing happened. Sometimes you wonder if he was genuinely oblivious or pretending not to know. “Sure. You know where I’ll be.”
After hanging up, you let the phone slip from your hand, staring at the ceiling. You weren’t supposed to do this. Mingyu was someone you should’ve been keeping at arm’s length, a complication you couldn’t afford. The smart thing would’ve been to ignore his call. But you didn’t. No matter how much you tried to keep your distance, you would always find yourself waltzing back towards him. 
You thought about how easy it would be to send a quick message, tell him not to come, maybe even block his number if you really wanted to make a clean break. You should. A single text, a few words, and it would all be over. Your fingers hovered over the screen, but you didn’t type anything.
Then the knock came, gentle but firm, and you abandoned all protests, tossing them aside as easily as you tossed your phone back into the drawer. You didn’t hesitate as you crossed the room, your hand already reaching for the doorknob.
When you opened the door, there he was—tall, tousled hair, a lopsided smile, as if he wasn’t entirely sure you’d actually let him in.
“Hey,” Mingyu said softly, standing in the doorway like he’d been there dozens of times before—he had.
“Hi,” you replied, your heartbeat picking up pace, louder now that he was here, standing in front of you.
Without another word, he stepped inside, scooping you up by the waist like it was a habit, crashing his lips into yours. For a split second, your mind screamed at you to stop, to push him away, but your body betrayed you. 
You kissed him back, letting yourself sink into the feeling. His hands moved to your back, pulling you even closer, and any remaining hesitation crumbled as the tension between you both sparked to life.
He was completely unaware, lost in the moment, and you let him be—because pretending felt easier than confronting the truth. It felt easier to let him kiss you like this, to let him believe everything between you was simple—as if you weren’t standing on the edge of something much heavier.
Mingyu pulled back just enough to look at you, brushing a stray lock of hair from your face with a grin. “Is Mina here?” His voice was teasing and light.
“You wouldn’t be here if she is,” you replied, breathless, your words barely forming as you watched him tug his sweater off, the urgency in his movements sending a fresh wave of heat through you.
For a moment, you stood there, watching as his sweater hit the floor, your heart racing against your better judgment. Here you go, again. You could stop it right here—send him home, tell him you don’t want to see him again even if that was a lie. Again, you didn’t. You reached for him, pulling him back toward you, his lips meeting yours with a kind of hunger that made you forget everything else.
The door clicked shut behind him, and with it, any resolve you thought you had.
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“Wait, hold up. Let me just—” You made a rolling gesture with your fingers, trying to gather your thoughts. “—roll it back a bit. I think I went straight to the intense part.”
Seungcheol’s calm demeanor didn’t budge. He leaned back. “Didn’t feel intense to me.”
“Yeah, well…” You shifted in your seat. “I should’ve started by telling you how we met, right? Or how we even ended up in… this kind of arrangement.”
He nodded. “Context would help.”
You paused, sipping your water. “Okay, so… I first met Mingyu in freshman year. Second semester, to be exact. We had one class together—gen-ed history. I was late the first day.” You smirked, remembering how rushed you’d been, shoes squeaking against the floor as you slipped into the back row, heart pounding from running across campus.
The only available seat was next to Mingyu. You didn't notice him at first because the room's quietness was the first to catch your attention.
You tugged his sleeve. “Hey, sorry to bother you.” You told him your name. “I just came in. Did I miss anything important? I feel like I did.”
He glanced at you, brows slightly raised. He looked half amused, half confused. “I'm Kim Mingyu. And… yeah, you missed a bit. Professor gave us five minutes to pray for the diagnostic test.”
“Pray?” you’d repeated, your disbelief clear, eyes wide as you stifled a laugh. “How hard could a gen-ed diagnostic exam be?”
Very hard. 
You cringed at the memory of that test and how you didn’t know the answers for most of it. Mingyu was grinning beside you, walking in easy strides. “Still think you didn’t need those five minutes to pray?”
You rolled your eyes, but there was no bite to it. “Alright, fine. I’m humbled. But you don’t have to be so smug about it.”
He chuckled, sliding his hands into his pockets. “I’m just teasing. Anyway, don’t worry about it. The test won’t affect your grades or anything.”
Before you could respond, another classmate who overheard had stopped to join your conversation. “Actually, it does count. It goes straight into your record.”
Mingyu snorted, clearly doubting it. “No way. It’s just a pre-assessment.”
“The professor said so herself. You probably didn’t hear because you left too soon.” She looked at you with a sympathetic smile. “But hey, I bombed it too, so… you’re not alone.”
You felt a strange sense of closeness with her, but mostly, you were trying to process what that meant for your grades. “Great,” you muttered, but you weren’t sure if you were saying it sarcastically or just in defeat.
“I'm Mina,” she said, offering her hand for a shake.
“Nice to meet you,” you chimed, shaking her hand and telling her your name.
“I know. See you around!”
When Mina walked away, you expected Mingyu to say something mocking, but instead, he just laughed lightly. “Guess I should’ve prayed too.”
Over the next few weeks, Mingyu became someone you interacted with mostly during class. You’d sit near each other by default—mainly because the two of you are often the last ones to arrive, you being late most of the time. You exchanged quiet jokes when the professor wasn’t looking and sometimes teamed up when group discussions were required. But outside that lecture hall, you led entirely separate lives.
In the hallways, you'd pass by each other every now and then. He’d nod or smile—never stopping, never lingering. Just a brief acknowledgment as you walked in opposite directions. Sometimes, you’d give him a quick wave, or he’d send you a lazy salute with his fingers.
During class breaks, when the professor let everyone stretch their legs for a few minutes, you’d talk. Mingyu liked to complain about how boring the lectures were, though his grumbling always seemed exaggerated, more for humor than actual frustration.
“Think I might pass out,” he’d groan, letting his head drop to the desk dramatically. “I don’t know how anyone stays awake for this.”
“You’d stay awake if you actually took notes,” you’d tease back, scribbling in your notebook as you spoke.
“Ah, but see, that’s what friends are for,” he’d reply, flashing you a playful grin. “You can lend me yours later.”
“You’re lucky you’re funny,” you’d retort, shaking your head with a smile.
But that was it. When class ended, he went his way, and you went yours. He wasn’t someone who crossed your mind outside of that classroom, and you suspected it was the same for him. Mingyu wasn’t a constant presence in your life, just a classmate who made lectures slightly more tolerable.
There was a comfort in that distance. He was easy to talk to, someone you didn’t have to think too hard about. No expectations, no complications. Just small moments of shared boredom, passed with lazy smiles and half-hearted complaints.
For a while, that was all he was—someone who filled the pauses between lectures. That is until the night of your first off-campus party for the semester.
The music pulsed around you, louder than it needed to be, vibrating through the floor and into your chest. You were seated at the edge of the crowded party, a half-empty cup of something strong in your hand, watching as your ex-boyfriend paraded his new girlfriend around like she was a shiny new toy. Every touch between them felt like a jab. You couldn’t care less about him, not really. But watching him be all giggly and touchy with her after he’d cheated on you with her, no less—yeah, that was annoying.
You took another sip from your drink, trying to keep your irritation in check. It didn’t help that they were standing close enough that you could hear snippets of their conversation—his low, stupid laugh and her breathy giggles.
“Someone’s pissed.”
The voice came from beside you, startling you out of your thoughts. You turned, finding Mingyu standing there with a half-smile, hands tucked in his hoodie pockets as he glanced over at your ex and his new girlfriend.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you replied, though your sarcasm was clear.
Mingyu raised an eyebrow, amused. “Come on. I’ve seen you shoot daggers at them from across the room.”
You sighed, leaning back in your chair and staring into your cup. “I’m not pissed. Just... annoyed.”
His eyes flicked over to the couple again, then back to you. “I get it. Ex-boyfriend?”
You hesitated but nodded. “Yeah. Not that it matters. We broke up ages ago.” You bit your lip before adding, “But he cheated on me with her. So, you know... watching them be all gross together isn’t exactly fun.”
Mingyu winced in sympathy. “That’s rough. Sounds like he’s not worth the headspace, though.”
“He’s not,” you said quickly, and you meant it. “But it’s still annoying.”
He snorted. “I don’t blame you. If it makes you feel any better, they look like a bad reality show couple.”
You couldn’t help but laugh at that. “Yeah, they kinda do.”
Mingyu shrugged, leaning a little closer, his voice dropping. “If it’s bugging you that much, want me to help you take your mind off it? We can head somewhere else, or... just stay here and make fun of them quietly. Your call.”
You hesitated, glancing at your ex one more time, then back at Mingyu. The idea of staying here, stewing in the background while they flaunted their new relationship, made your stomach turn. Maybe leaving was the better option.
“Actually,” you said, standing up and finishing the last of your drink, “let’s get out of here. This party’s boring anyway.”
Mingyu’s eyebrows shot up, clearly surprised but pleased. “Alright. Lead the way.”
The two of you slipped out of the crowded party and into the cooler, quieter night. The noise faded behind you as you stepped outside, the crisp air was a welcome relief from the stifling atmosphere of the party. You hadn’t really thought about where you were going, just that you needed to leave.
“Any place in mind?” Mingyu asked, falling into step beside you, hands still casually tucked into his pockets.
You scoffed. “I don’t know. This was your idea.”
He shrugged, glancing at the sky briefly before turning back to you. “We could walk a bit. Sober up.”
“I barely drank.”
Mingyu nodded. “Okay, fair. If you want, I’ve got some soju and beer at my place. Not much, but it’s better than whatever was in that cup you were drinking.”
You glanced at him. There was no pressure in his tone, no hidden motive—just a suggestion. Still, something about the idea of going to his place made your heart beat a little faster.
“Exactly how many ulterior motives do you have right now?” you asked, narrowing your eyes at him in mock suspicion.
A grin spread across his face. “For now, zero,” he replied, showing a zero with his fingers.
“For now?” You rolled your eyes. “Better keep it at zero.”
Mingyu winced with a mock-hurt expression. “Do I have to make promises too? Man, this is a lot of work.”
“Kim Mingyu!”
“Okay, okay,” he laughed, raising his hands. “Come on. It’s this way.”
The walk to Mingyu’s apartment wasn’t long, but the conversation between you was comfortable. He was funny, as always. By the time you reached his door, your cheeks were red and slightly hurting with how much you were laughing.
His place was a studio, small and cozy with a few mismatched pieces of furniture. It was tidy, except for the couch, which was covered in a pile of unfolded laundry.
“Oh, crap,” he muttered, laughing awkwardly. “I forgot about that. Let me just—”
“Oh, it’s okay. I don’t mind at all,” you said, waving your hand dismissively.
“Nah, there’s nowhere else to sit,” he insisted, kicking off his shoes and quickly tidying the couch.
While he put his clothes into a basket, you took a moment to look around. The tidiness of his home was unexpected. You rarely judge people’s living spaces but it was surprising for a man to be this clean. Then again, that was just the stereotype speaking.
Mingyu grabbed two beers from the fridge, tossing you one as you settled onto the now-cleared couch.
You raised an eyebrow, inspecting the can. “You promised me soju.”
He chuckled, opening his own drink. “Well, you told me to keep my motives in check, so soju is out of the table.”
“You’re no fun.”
As you sipped your drinks, the conversation flowed easily. You talked about class, made fun of the test you’d failed, and joked about the people at the party. But somewhere between the laughter and the quiet moments, the atmosphere began to shift. The space between you felt a little smaller, the eye contact a little longer. It wasn’t forced, just... there.
At some point, Mingyu’s arm stretched across the back of the couch, his fingers brushing against your shoulder. You didn’t move away. Instead, you leaned into him slightly, the warmth of his presence comforting.
“I think you should go,” he said softly, his voice barely above a whisper.
“Wow, okay. There’s no need to shoo me away. I’ll go,” you scoffed, offended. You stood up instantly, reaching for your jacket but he grabbed your wrist.
“No, I don’t mean—” he paused, sighing as he looked at your annoyed expression. “I’m sorry. Come sit. Don’t go.”
You didn’t answer, instead, swatted his hand away and put on your jacket. Mingyu stood up, taking your hand and squeezing it.
“Please,” he sighed, holding your gaze.
You were exasperated. “What’s wrong with you? Why are you acting so confusing all of a sudden?”
There was a glint of hesitation on his face. “Can I be honest?”
You retracted your hand and crossed your arms over your chest. Then you raised an eyebrow, urging him to speak.
Mingyu leaned back slightly, his expression shifting to something more serious. “I have at least six ulterior motives.”
You raised an eyebrow, curiosity piqued. “Six? What are they?”
“Are you sure you want to find out?” he asked back, but it didn’t seem like a question to know how curious you were. Somehow, it sounded as if he was asking for permission.
You held his gaze, feeling the warmth radiating from him, the air around you charged with an intensity you couldn’t ignore. Time seemed to slow as you considered his question.
Finally, you broke the silence, your voice steady but low. “Yes.”
Before you could think about what came next, he leaned in, closing the distance between you. His hand slipped around your waist, pulling you just a little closer. There was no hesitation this time, no second thoughts. The tension that had been building all night finally found its release as he leaned in, his lips brushing yours in a tentative kiss.
You kissed him back, slowly at first, as if testing the waters, but it didn’t take long before the hesitation melted away. You know where this was going—but whether it was just the alcohol, the moment, or something more that drove you to do this, you didn't know. But for now, it didn’t matter. All that mattered was the way Mingyu’s lips felt against yours, the quiet hum of desire building between you as you let yourself get lost in the moment.
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Your fingers drummed rhythmically on the table, eyeing Seungcheol as if trying to gouge out his thoughts. His head was tilted slightly, thinking about your question: ‘What do you think happened next?’
“You became friends with benefits,” he said with certainty.
Your fingers stopped abruptly. “Really? You didn’t think we’d started dating after that?”
He shrugged nonchalantly. “Did you?”
“No,” you replied sheepishly. “But you seemed so sure that we were gonna be friends with benefits.”
“I had a hunch. It didn’t seem like your connection was building up to a romantic relationship just yet.”
You scowled, confused. “What do you mean? You didn’t think our connection was romantic?”
“Not at all. You were just friends. There was nothing that hinted any romance until the night you went to his flat.”
“Ah, I see what you mean.”
Seungcheol nodded, not smiling but he seemed pleased with himself. “So, what happened next?”
What happened next? You and Mingyu became friends with benefits, that’s what happened. Despite that arrangement, Mingyu was thoughtful in ways that made it hard to draw a clear line between what was casual and what wasn’t.
At university, nothing changed. You were still just classmates—maybe not even that close. You’d smile at each other in passing, maybe sit near each other in a lecture like usual, but that was it. To anyone else, you were barely acquaintances. But behind closed doors, it was different—passionate, fervent, and surreally euphoric.
Soon after that first night, you moved your rendezvous to your place. Your apartment was bigger than Mingyu’s tiny studio, with enough space for both of you to comfortably exist, though most of the time you didn’t bother with space. Whenever he came over, it didn’t take long for his hands to find you or for you to pull him in. There was something magnetic between you, like a spark that kept reigniting no matter how many times you tried to cool it down.
The passion was always there, and you were always eager to touch each other. Sometimes, you wouldn’t even make it to the bed—his lips on yours, your hands tugging at his shirt, and before you knew it, you’d be tangled in each other, the sheets forgotten. Other times, when the heat had subsided, you’d lay there talking, conversations flowing easily about anything and everything.
It was odd, in a way—how effortless it felt when you were alone together. You could laugh, joke, and even sit in silence without any discomfort. Yet, in public, it was like nothing existed between you. Mingyu never brought it up, and neither did you. It was easier that way. You weren’t together, after all—just two people who couldn’t get enough of each other when no one was watching.
Sometimes, the heat was so consuming, that it blurred the lines between passion and affection. And yet, after the fire died down, there was always this: Mingyu, showing up with bread that you loved, like it was the most normal thing in the world.
“You’re here already?” you asked, surprised to see Mingyu standing in your living room, browsing your bookshelf like he had all the time in the world.
“Hey, beautiful,” he greeted, flashing a smile as he carefully returned a small ceramic bear to its place.
“How did you get here so fast? You texted me like ten minutes ago,” you said, dropping your bag on the sofa as you walked toward him. 
“I was nearby,” he said with a casual shrug, wrapping his arms around your waist. His lips met yours in a soft kiss, the familiar spark flickering between you. When he pulled away, he said, “I picked up some bread on my way here.”
“No way, is it the same ones you brought last time?” You couldn’t hide your excitement as you reached for the bakery bag he’d left on the coffee table.
He nodded, looking pleased with himself. “Yep, that’s the one.”
You sat in the living room that afternoon, talking over warm cups of chocolate and bread. You barely paid attention to the football game on the TV, giggling and pawing at each other, feeling cozy despite the cold weather outside.
At some point, Mingyu’s hands moved to your shoulders, and you sighed in contentment. “Thanks, I needed this,” you murmured, closing your eyes as his skilled fingers worked through the tension. It was one of Mingyu’s many skills, massages.
He leaned closer, pressing a kiss to your bare shoulder. “We should take this inside.”
You opened one eye, pretending not to understand. “Take what inside?”
Mingyu chuckled, his lips curving against your skin. “Well, if you want to do it here, that’s fine too but we should probably turn off the TV. I don’t feel comfortable having my idols watch,” he replied, making you turn to face him.
“Your idols?”
Mingyu shrugged and then nodded towards the TV where the football game was still on. Scoffing, you grabbed a throw pillow and hit him with it. You both laughed about it for a while, but eventually decided to lock yourselves in your bedroom.
Later that night, you stirred, the quiet glow of a laptop screen pulling you from sleep. Blinking, you realized Mingyu was no longer beside you. He was sitting on the floor, his back resting against the bed, fingers tapping rapidly on the keys.
Reaching out, you squeezed his shoulder. “What are you doing?” you asked, your voice thick with sleep.
Mingyu paused, turning slightly to kiss your knuckles. “Go back to sleep, baby. I just need to finish this.”
“Can’t it wait till morning?” you mumbled, burying your face in the pillow.
He shifted closer, wrapping an arm around you. With a soft shush, he ran his fingers through your hair. “Shh, it’s okay. I’ll be done soon. Just sleep.”
You sighed, eyes fluttering shut as he kissed your forehead. At that moment, it seemed so normal, so typical of him. But you didn’t realize at the time—it was a sign that Mingyu had trouble sleeping through the night.
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Mingyu had a quiet way of making you feel seen. It wasn’t grand gestures or romantic proclamations, but in the little things he did—thoughtful acts that slipped under the radar until you realized just how much attention he paid. One time during class, he came over holding a tiny ceramic bear, almost shy as he handed it to you.
“What’s this?” you asked, turning the figurine over in your hands.
“I noticed that your bear family didn’t have a dad, so,” he said with a small grin, watching as your eyes lit up in recognition. 
It was such a simple thing, but the fact that he remembered your collection, that he’d thought of you—it left you feeling touched.
“You didn’t have to do this,” you murmured, smiling. “But thanks.”
“It’s a grizzly, not a polar bear. Is that okay?”
“Are you kidding me? It’s perfect,” you giggled. “He’ll have to take up the responsibility of taking care of kids who aren’t his though.”
Mingyu shrugged, though there was a quiet satisfaction in his expression. “He’ll be a good stepdad to them. I can vouch.”
“You barely know the guy,” you laughed, playing along.
It wasn’t just gifts. Mingyu had a habit of taking care of the little things in your life without even asking. Like the time the lightbulb in your bathroom had gone out. You didn’t mention it to him, but the next time he came over, he had a replacement bulb in his bag. 
“Didn’t realize you were an electrician now,” you joked as he stood on a chair, screwing in the new bulb.
He laughed. “Just figured you’d forget to buy one.”
“I wasn’t going to forget,” you protested, even though he was right. “But… thanks.”
It was like that often with him—effortless, natural.
“Alright, let’s see,” he said, stepping down from the chair and reaching for the switch to test if it worked. When it did, he let out a satisfied hum. “There you go. Good as new.”
“How much for your labor, good sir?” you quipped, wiping away the tiny beads of sweat forming on his forehead.
The grin Mingyu gave you was menacing, shamelessly checking you out in your tank top and shorts. “I’ll have you know I do not accept monetary fees.”
You knew what he meant and he made it especially clear when he casually pressed his palm on your left boob. You just scoffed and swatted his hand away. “I see you work pro bono. Thanks a lot.”
With a teasing grin, you walked away. In the kitchen, he cooked dinner while you sat on the counter, munching on an apple. You found it amusing that the wok he used was something he had brought from his own flat. It's been in your kitchen for a while now. Today, he brought his own kitchen knife.
“You might as well move in at this rate,” you teased after he warned you to be careful with his sharp knife. “What’s next? A drawer for your clothes?”
He raised an eyebrow. “I’ll consider it.”
“You might as well do since you’re here almost every day,” you jeered. “You should bring your own toothbrush too.”
“Ah, that reminds me.” He moved toward you, placing a kiss on your cheek as he rummaged through the paper bag resting on your lap. From there, he fished out two toothbrushes, holding them up like a peace offering. “Look. They came in pairs.”
You laughed, shaking your head. “I use an electric toothbrush, you know.”
“Then keep it as a backup,” he shrugged, still grinning. “Or don't. It’s not a big deal.”
You’d joked at first, but eventually, you started using the toothbrush he brought. It felt like a small connection, something that tied him a little more closely to you, even if neither of you talked about it.
And he remembered everything. When you ordered food, he always knew exactly what you wanted without asking. “Chicken katsu with extra sauce,” he’d say, already placing the order. He’d put on music that matched your mood perfectly, like the playlists you loved but never had to mention. Even the book you had been reading—he remembered the title, asked if you’d finished it yet.
Those little moments kept piling up, making it harder to separate the physical nature of your relationship from the real deal. Every time he remembered, every time he took care of something small, you wondered if maybe this wasn’t just friends with benefits after all.
But then there were moments of uncertainty that made you question how much you really knew about him. Sometimes, in quiet moments, he would zone out, lost in thought. You vividly remember one evening when you were curled up together on the couch, a movie playing softly in the background. You had been laughing at the antics on-screen, leaning into him, when you glanced over and found him staring blankly at the flickering light of the television.
When he slept over, you’d sometimes wake up to find him staring at the ceiling. His face was relaxed, but there was a tension in the way his jaw was set, a hint of a furrow in his brow. You reached out to touch his face, hoping to draw him back into the intimacy you cherished.
“Mingyu?” you whispered, your voice thick with sleep.  He’d blinked, as if waking from a dream, and he turned to you then. For a brief moment, you saw a flicker of something vulnerable in his eyes before he masked it with a smile. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I was just… thinking,” he replied, his voice trailing off. You could see it in his eyes—something was weighing heavily on him, a thought he was wrestling with that he didn’t want to share.
“About what?” you prodded, trying to gouge out something—anything that he’s willing to share. He shifted slightly as if the question made him uncomfortable.
“Just stuff. Don’t worry about it,” he said, a noncommittal answer that only left you more curious. He pulled you closer in a warm embrace. “Let’s go back to sleep.”
The way he shrugged it off felt like a wall going up between you, and for a moment, the warmth of his embrace dissipated. You didn’t push further; you never wanted to pressure him. Instead, you closed your eyes, though you couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off.
You wanted to know, to understand what made him so distant at times, but every time you tried to get closer, he would slip away like sand through your fingers. You had asked about it in passing, and while he always deflected your inquiries with a joke or a change of subject, it left you wondering if there was more to his silence. You didn’t want to overthink it; after all, it didn’t happen often. Or so you told yourself, hoping that with time, he would open up.
But instead of that, Mingyu disappeared, leaving behind an emptiness that echoed in the spaces where he once filled your days with warmth and laughter.
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“Are you keeping up?” you questioned, raising an eyebrow at Seungcheol who seemed to be quite slow at processing what you’d just told him.
“Yeah, of course. Though, I’m not gonna lie. I’m a little lost,” he admitted, arms crossed and holding his chin. “If you don’t mind, can I ask why he disappeared?”
You smirked, standing up at once. “I’m gonna need a drink for this.”
Seungcheol’s understood. “By all means.”
Mingyu’s disappearance wasn’t sudden or unexpected; there were signs you hadn’t recognized until he was gone. It began with him replying late to your messages, then not replying at all. You’d see him in class, and when you approached, he didn’t avoid you outright but dodged your questions and made excuses to avoid conversation. Eventually, he started sitting on the opposite side of the lecture hall, far from you and even missed a handful of classes.
You were upset, not just because he chose to stop seeing you but because he didn’t give you any warning. You had been easing into it, getting used to the idea of something more. But when he left so abruptly, you felt foolish.
Still, you had to come to terms with the fact that there was no commitment between you—what you shared was temporary, and he was free to walk away just as you were. It didn’t change the fact that his action was a total jerk move.
“It’s okay. We were just fooling around anyway,” you told yourself after almost two weeks of silence. You forced a smile at your reflection in the mirror. “That’s right. You’ll be fine.”
You tried to push Mingyu out of your mind, diving into a busy social life—going out with friends and meeting new people. At one party, you were in the midst of flirting with a cute guy when you spotted Mingyu across the room. A wave of warmth washed over you at the sight of him, but you played it cool, pretending to be engrossed in your conversation. 
“So, are you always at Jinwoo’s party?” you asked, trying to sound charming but feeling more like a dork.
“Only when there’s free food,” he replied, a little too eagerly.
You forced a laugh, trying to play along. “Well, they do have snacks... and drinks.”
He leaned in closer. “You know, I’m really into snacks. Like, I could talk about snacks all night.”
Your stomach turned slightly at the sudden wave of ick. You couldn’t tell if he was serious, or just saying it to be funny. What the hell does that even mean?
You caught a glimpse of Mingyu from the corner of your eye, leaning against the wall, arms crossed, watching the exchange with an amused expression. Heat rushed to your cheeks as you realized how embarrassing this was—Mingyu was listening, and you couldn’t bear the thought of him hearing you flounder like this.
“Right, snacks. That’s... cool.” You shot him a tight smile, glancing around the room in a bid to escape. “Speaking of snacks, I’m gonna go get me some more. Excuse me,” you smiled and slipped away from the guy, the weight of Mingyu’s gaze following you as you headed outside.
“Wow, that was awful,” Mingyu said, appearing beside you just as you stepped into the cool air.
“You,” you spat, glaring at him.
“Hello to you too,” he replied, a playful smirk tugging at his lips.
You narrowed your eyes at him, crossing your arms. “What’s your opinion on people eavesdropping on other’s conversations instead of minding their own business?”
“I wasn’t eavesdropping,” he teased, though the grin on his face suggested otherwise. “I can’t help it if you guys were loud enough for me to hear, can I?”
“That doesn’t change the fact that it’s none of your business,” you replied smartly, looking away with a frown.
Mingyu’s laugh was deep, the kind that made your stomach twist in a way that was all too familiar. “Alright. I’m sorry. How about hanging out with me so you need not deal with all those lame guys?”
“Pretty sure you’re much much lamer,” you scoffed. 
He called your name softly, a teasing smile playing on his lips but his eyes were more serious than before. You failed to ignore the way your heart began to race. “Lighten up. I missed you, you know.”
You raised an eyebrow. “Oh? Do you now?”
“I did.” Mingyu’s gaze flickered to your lips for a split second before he grinned again. “I missed you so much, I thought I’d go nuts.”
The confession caught you off guard but your annoyance was stronger. You scoffed, struggling to hold back and trying not to just go ahead and smack him. “Then you shouldn’t have ghosted me like that.”
His smile faltered slightly. The air between you shifted again, the playful banter fading into something heavier. Mingyu didn’t respond right away, and the silence that followed wasn’t awkward—just filled with something unspoken.
After a long pause, he finally nodded. “Yeah, you’re right. I’m sorry about that.”
You smirked, looking away and fixing your gaze into nothing. He should be sorry, it’s only right to be. But the fact remained: you were not in the kind of relationship where you could hold him hostage for something he was allowed to do. Yet here you were, feeling more hurt than you were allowed to be.
You let the silence hang between you, thick with unspoken tension. It went on for a while before it was broken by the sound of people clambering out of the main door, their drunken laughter echoing in the cool night air.
“Wanna get out of here?” Mingyu finally asked, breaking the spell.
“Took you long enough to ask,” you replied, striding toward the street with him following closely behind.
As you were passing by the parking lot filled with cars, Mingyu suddenly grabbed your hand. “We’re not walking to your apartment. That’s like a mile-long hike.”
“What?” you asked, confused but still allowing him to lead you toward a black SUV.
He opened the passenger door and gestured for you to get in. While he rounded the car to the driver’s side, you glanced around the unfamiliar interior, a fleeting thought crossing your mind that maybe this wasn’t his car. But as soon as he slid into the seat and turned the key in the ignition, you relaxed a little.
“Please tell me this is yours and you didn’t just steal it.”
Mingyu chuckled, his smile easing some of your lingering unease. “Why would you think that?”
“Because last time I checked, you didn’t have a car,” you replied, watching him navigate the vehicle out of the parking lot.
“Oh, this is my dad’s. He’s letting me borrow it while I’m staying with them.”
You blinked, surprised. That was the first time Mingyu had mentioned his family or anything about his life outside of university. Naturally, curiosity sparked in you.
“You moved back to your family’s house?” you asked, hoping to finally get some insight into where he’d disappeared to.
“Yeah, had to,” he said casually, his gaze fixed on the road ahead.
“Why?”
He hesitated, fingers tightening on the steering wheel for just a second before he shrugged. “Just some stuff came up. Nothing major.”
There was something vague about his response, and you could sense the conversation wasn’t going to go any deeper. He’d always been good at deflecting when it came to his personal life.
You nodded, accepting the explanation without pressing further, even though the curiosity still lingered in the back of your mind. It was frustrating, but at the same time, you’d gotten used to the fact that Mingyu shared only what he wanted, and nothing more. Maybe it was just his way of keeping distance—emotional distance, that is.
When you arrived at your apartment, you barely had time to take a breath before Mingyu’s arms wrapped around you, pulling you into him. It was like being caged, but in a way that made you feel safe, wanted. You couldn’t explain how much you had missed this—missed him. His warmth, his touch, the way his presence alone seemed to fill the space around you.
As you moved together from the living room to the bedroom, it felt inevitable, like gravity pulling you into his orbit once again. You knew you were letting yourself fall, diving headfirst into the abyss of passion and euphoria that was Kim Mingyu. And yet, even knowing that, you didn’t stop yourself.
You couldn’t.
“You missed me, didn’t you?” he whispered as he took your breast in his mouth.
Yes, you wanted to scream out, but all that ever left your mouth was a lewd moan. And when he heard that, he slid a hand under your dress, moving down to your hips and slipping inside your lace panties to put pressure there. He caressed your sex slowly, and then urgently in circling motions while his kisses trailed up from your breast to your neck, nipping at the supple skin before they found your lips.
Your hands had a mind of their own, greedily removing his jacket, and then running your fingers on the firm muscles and warm skin underneath. As the pleasure grew, it clouded your brain and you clung your arms around his neck in fear that your trembling legs would collapse under you.
“Lie down, baby,” he rasped in your ear, pushing you gently towards the bed.
You let yourself fall on the mattress, bouncing slightly. You watched as he undid his belt and kicked off his jeans before moving to undress you out of your dress. You saw how he ogled your body with those beautiful lustful eyes before he hovered over you and traced the outline of your face with his fingers.
“Do you have any idea how amazing you are?” he whispered. He slid a finger into your mouth and you sucked it, making him exhale sharply and dive in to kiss you feverishly.
You were almost breathless with desire, your skin prickling with anticipation of what was about to happen—of what Mingyu was about to do. You could feel him against your thigh, hot and hard, so you spread your legs open, welcoming him.
And then with one push, he was filling you—stretching you in the most exquisite way possible. His body pressed against you as he thrust in and out in a rhythm that sent ripples of pleasure through every single nerve in your body.
And all of a sudden, he stopped, leaving you momentarily confused. He stood up and said, “Come here.” 
Without a word, you obliged, walking toward him in a haste. He then spinned you around so you were facing the full-length mirror in the corner of your room. “Take a good look at yourself.”
You saw yourself in the mirror; messy hair, flushed cheeks, and your lips swollen from kissing. You could see him in your reflection, standing behind you with fire in his eyes. You watched as he reached for your breast, while his other hand cupped your sex, collecting the slick in his hand before bringing it to his tongue.
You gasped at how hot he looked, and seeing your reaction made Mingyu grin. Without warning, he pushed you back on the bed, lifted you by the waist so your ass was sticking out. Then he pressed your face on the mattress before you felt a sharp, delightful pain on your buttcheek where he smacked you with his palm.
“Oh, Mingyu!” you cried out.
He leaned down to whisper in your ear. “That’s not loud enough, baby.”
“Mingyu, please!” you begged, needing nothing but to be filled again.
Once again, he pushed his cock inside you, making you whimper in the most obscene manner.
“Fuck,” he grunted. His fingers dug hard into your hips as he thrust deeply and vigorously. Your hand held onto the sheets, pleasure so intense that you couldn’t think anymore—you couldn’t even see your own naked, sweaty self in the mirror in front of you. But you could hear the sound of bodies slamming into each other again and again and a breathless moan that must have been coming from your own throat.
When the ecstatic high engulfed the two of you, he loosened his hold of your waist and your legs felt so weak you could barely hold yourself up. So you collapsed on the bed, followed by Mingyu, panting beside you with a satisfied look on his face. 
“How was that?” he said smugly, knowing damn well how wonderful he made you feel.
You just laughed, snuggling into him as you put off washing up for a few more minutes.
The heated passion gave way to a quiet intimacy as you both settled into bed. The sound of rain tapping against the window filled the silence, soothing and rhythmic.
You chatted lazily about random things—music, classes, friends—until you finally gathered the courage to ask, “What happened to you? Where’ve you been?”
“I’m really sorry. I got busy with school and stuff at home,” Mingyu replied, his tone casual. But you could sense something unspoken beneath his words, as always. “Did you miss me?” he added, trying to keep it light.
You had missed him. A lot. But you weren’t about to admit that. “Barely. Didn’t even notice you were gone.”
Mingyu chuckled, clearly not buying it. “Is that why you were out there flirting with every cute guy you meet?”
You raised an eyebrow, grinning. “You seem to know an awful lot about me. One might think you’re interested or something.”
He laughed softly, the kind of laugh that made your stomach flutter. “You’ll find that I am, in fact, very interested,” he said with a quiet conviction. And suddenly, the air between you shifted again, filled with tension—desire mingling with uncertainty.
“Say,” Mingyu began, his voice lowering as he tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear. “Do you want to be exclusive?”
Your heart raced at the word. “Exclusive…? Like—”
“Like not sleeping with other people,” he clarified, though that wasn’t quite the question you were about to ask.
You were about to ask if he meant dating. Thank God you didn’t.
“Oh…” you trailed off, unsure how to respond. “Why?”
Mingyu shrugged, his tone still casual. “No reason. It’s okay if you don’t want to. You’re free to do whatever you want. But… it’d be nice, don’t you think?”
There was no reason to say no. The truth was, you’d stopped considering other guys long ago, the moment this thing with Mingyu began. Still, his offer made your heart race—both giddy and nervous. But there was no way you’d let him see that.
“I don’t know. Doesn’t seem like a fair deal,” you quipped, hiding behind banter.
Mingyu narrowed his eyes at you, curious. “Wait, what does that mean?”
You shrugged again, refusing to elaborate, though it didn’t really mean anything.
“Hold on—what?” He sat up, feigning shock, and flexed his arms dramatically. “You don’t think this is a fair deal?”
“Where?” you teased, squinting at his muscles like you couldn’t see them.
Mingyu grinned and started flexing even harder, pointing out specific muscles like they were on display. “You seriously don’t see this? Look closely and tell me this isn’t a fair deal.”
You giggled, reaching for him with your toes. Grinning, he grabbed your foot and pulled you toward him. The sudden tug made you squeal.
“Come on, baby, take it back.” He leaned down, hovering over you, eyes soft. “Take it back while I’m still being nice.”
“I didn’t ask you to be nice,” you taunted, your coy smile daring him.
Mingyu chuckled low in his throat. “You’re extra beautiful when you’re naughty, did you know that?”
“No idea,” you replied, grinning as he leaned in, capturing your lips again. When his hand cupped your boob, you pulled away from the kiss and pushed him off. “No.”
“Aw, fine,” he sighed in defeat, falling next to you on the bed. Quietly, he settled behind you, wrapping an arm around your torso and sliding his other arm under your head. “Get some rest.”
He didn't say much after that, but there was a warmth in the way he pulled you closer, an unconscious act of intimacy that made your chest tighten.
It hit you then—how much you’d come to crave moments like this, not just the passion, but the feeling of being with him, of having him there with you in the silence. You’d never felt this way before, not even with past relationships, and the realization made your heart race. You were falling for him, had already fallen. It wasn’t the way he teased you or the way he kissed you, but the quiet moments in between, where you felt like he saw you, really saw you.
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It had been a long week. Between schoolwork, dealing with your chaotic schedule, and pretending like everything with Mingyu was still as casual as it used to be, you were exhausted. The tension gnawed at you—this thing between you two was starting to feel like more than it should. It wasn’t something you were ready to acknowledge yet, but it lingered in the back of your mind.
You walked into your apartment after a particularly grueling day, half-expecting the silence to greet you. When you walked into the kitchen for water, you found a small plastic bag filled with food on the table. Next to it was a tiny ceramic panda bear, about half the size of your palm.
You blinked, trying to process it. It wasn’t there this morning. Mingyu must’ve stopped by.
You walked over to the counter, looking at the items. Inside the bag were a couple of your favorite snacks—nothing big, just the kind of things you liked to nibble on when you were too tired to cook. There was no note, but the panda felt like something only he would give you. It was cute in an oddly sentimental way, like he knew you’d smile at it.
You heard a knock at the door and quickly set the bear back on the counter, hurrying to open it. Mingyu stood there, casual as ever.
“Hey,” he said, flashing you that familiar, easygoing grin.
“Hey,” you replied, smiling back. “Did you stop by earlier? Or do I have a creepy psychopathic stalker who’s obsessed with me and thinks it’s romantic to leave food for me at home while I’m away?”
Mingyu laughed heartily. “What are you gonna do if the creepy psychopathic stalker was me?”
“I’m calling the police,” you told him, closing the door to his face. He didn’t stop you, nor did he knock for about thirty seconds after you closed the door so you opened it again. “Come on in, then.”
“I was in the area so I thought I’d drop by and surprise you but you weren’t home,” he explained, kicking his shoes off at the foyer.
“Snacks and a panda?” you asked, raising an eyebrow but smiling. “That’s quite a combination.”
Mingyu shrugged, a soft laugh escaping him. “I saw it in this shop near campus. And I figured if it was you, you wouldn’t leave it alone in that shop.”
“I don’t go around adopting every bear figurine I see, Mingyu,” you snorted, picking up the panda again.
“Maybe, but since he’s already here, you should have it up there with your little bear family,” he beamed, taking the panda from your hand and placing it up on the shelf with the rest of your bear collections. “She can be their Chinese aunt.”
“Because she’s from China?” you asked and saw him nod his head. You both laughed. “I’m sure they appreciate you making their family bigger.”
“Thanks for saying that,” he smiled, not the mischievous kind of smile that he usually sported, but a sincere one—as if he was touched by your statement. “I’m glad I could make them happy,” he added, staring at the bear family.
You stared at him for a moment, something warm and unfamiliar swelling in your chest. This wasn’t just some casual fling anymore, was it? You tried to play it cool, but the way he just knew—the way he quietly showed up in your life, making you feel special in small but wonderful ways—made it harder to keep pretending you didn’t care. You could only hope he’d open up to you and let you into his world. That way, you could love him properly.
“Thanks,” you said softly. “It’s cute.”
“Yeah?” he asked, turning his gaze back at you. “You’re cute.”
You rolled your eyes, though your heart skipped a beat. “Shut up.”
Mingyu chuckled, leaning against the wall, watching you with an unreadable expression. It was like he wanted to say something but was holding back. You were holding back too, both of you toeing the line of something you could not bring up.
“I’ll make you dinner,” you offered, trying to fill the silence.
“You don’t have to,” Mingyu replied, but you were already walking toward the kitchen, grateful for the distraction.
The rest of the evening was spent with each other’s company, sitting together on the sofa with your head resting on his chest as he absentmindedly stroked your hair. The silence wasn’t awkward or strained; if anything, it was soothing, the kind of peace that made you feel safe and whole.
It is in moments like this that you realize you need not fill every moment with words. Being with him like this was comfortable and nice.
Mingyu shifted slightly, one hand holding your shoulder as he reached for his phone on the coffee table. You glanced up at him, watching as the light from the screen cast soft shadows across his face. You’d memorized every detail of how he looked by now—the sharp lines of his jaw, the way his eyes crinkled when he smiled, that playful smirk he always wore. But tonight, something about him felt different. His dark hair, slightly disheveled, framed his forehead just the right way, and you couldn’t help but think of how soft it looked—how soft it felt the mornings you ran your fingers through it when he was half-asleep. He always looked good, like some kind of casual perfection, but right now, with his face relaxed in the glow of the phone, he looked almost unreal.
You’d thought he was handsome the day you met him—he’d always had that charm that caught you off guard—but now, now that you’d spent nights tracing every inch of him, mornings laughing at how messy his hair could get, and afternoons like this where he seemed so unaware of how much space he took up in your thoughts... it hit you all over again. He wasn’t just good-looking. He was beautiful in a way that made you ache a little, like your mind couldn’t fully comprehend that someone like him was sitting here with you.
His voice broke through your reverie, a gentle reminder that this wasn’t some dream you’d conjured up. He really was here. “Ah, I almost forgot. Exams start tomorrow. Are you ready?”
You pressed your lips together in a tight line, suddenly reminded of the real world. “I’ve gone through all my notes, but I’m not sure,” you muttered, the conversation feeling trivial compared to what was really on your mind. You weren’t thinking about exams. You were thinking about how, with him beside you like this, nothing else seemed to matter.
“We could pray,” he snickered. “For our grades.”
You rolled your eyes. “As if you have to. You’re gonna ace everything and graduate with flying colors.”
Mingyu chuckled. “We’re freshmen—ages away from graduation.”
“Yes, but if you continue at your current pace, you’d really graduate with distinction.”
He hummed, kissing your forehead. “You think too highly of me. I like it more when you used to call me a himbo. Less pressure.”
Without thinking, you let out a soft sigh, turning to look at him. Really look at him. His focus had shifted back to his phone, his long fingers casually scrolling through whatever app he was on, but there was a subtle tension in his jaw, like maybe he was thinking about something too.
“Let’s go to bed. I’m tired,” you said, nuzzling into his shirt.
Mingyu sighed, pulling you closer as he placed his phone down. “Sorry. I have to be home tonight.”
“Oh.” You didn’t mean for it to sound so disappointed, but it slipped out anyway.
Mingyu rubbed the back of his neck, clearly sensing the shift. “I just have to help out at home tonight. My parents…” He trailed off, leaving the explanation half-formed, and you didn’t press him for more.
“Right. Of course,” you said, forcing a small smile. “You don’t have to explain.”
There was an awkward pause before he kissed the top of your head again, his voice soft. “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”
“Yeah, sure.” You sat up as he rose from the couch, the warm space he left behind feeling a little colder already.
Mingyu grabbed his jacket from the chair, glancing at you with a small, apologetic smile. “I’ll text you.”
You nodded, watching as he left, and once the door clicked shut behind him, the silence of the room felt a little too loud.
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“He’s just busy with exams,” you told yourself, sitting in your living room with your elbows propped on your knees, chin in your hands. You stared at the bears on the bookshelf, speaking to them as though they could somehow offer an answer. “Or maybe he had stuff to take care of at home.”
It had been four days, and you hadn’t heard from Mingyu. He texted after he left your apartment like he said he would, but after that—nothing. The last thing he mentioned was that he was spending time with his father. But then, radio silence.
“He should at least check in on me, right?” you muttered, leaning back into the sofa. “It’s been four days.”
Just as you were spiraling further into your thoughts, your phone buzzed in your hand, making you sit back up with a jolt. Your heart raced at the thought of Mingyu finally texting you, but your excitement died down as quickly as it came. It was just Mina.
Mina: otw to pick u up. U ready?
“Oh, shit,” you cursed, bolting upright. You scrambled to your bedroom, throwing on the first outfit you could find that was semi-decent for a party.
You spent the next five minutes getting ready, knowing Mina lived nearby and would be here in less than ten minutes. By the time you heard the knock on your door, you were almost done with your makeup, except for the lipstick that you decided you’d do in the car.
“Coming!” you called out, rushing to slip on your shoes as you headed for the door. But when you flung the door open, it wasn’t Mina standing outside.
Mingyu stood there, his hands tucked into his hoodie pockets, wearing the faintest of smiles. “Hi.”
“Mingyu!” you exclaimed, gripping the doorknob to resist the urge to leap into his arms. “What are you doing here?” 
 “I thought I’d drop by. Is now a bad time?”
“No! I mean, yes—kinda! I’m going to Hoshi’s party,” you rambled.
Mingyu nodded, a flicker of realization crossing his face. “Ah! I was supposed to go there too. Should we go together?”
“My friends are already on their way to pick me up,” you said quickly, wincing. “Come inside for a bit.”
You pulled him in by the sleeve, shutting the door before Mina could catch you in this whirlwind of confusion. Mingyu was here—after four days of nothing—and suddenly, all those unspoken thoughts came rushing back. Why hadn’t he reached out? What was going on?
“You said you’re supposed to go to the party?” you asked, trying to keep your voice steady.
“Yeah,” he answered, walking closer and resting his forehead on your shoulder. His sigh was long, deep, and heavy. Much heavier than you expected.
“Is everything okay?” you asked, placing a gentle hand on his back.
“Yeah, it’s just… I’ve been exhausted these days,” he confessed, sighing again. He wrapped his arms around your waist. “Let’s just stay like this for a while.”
And you did. You let him stay there, gently stroking his back in hopes that it would bring him comfort from whatever it was that was bothering him. It was as if you could sense the weight of his worries pressing down on him.
In that silence, your mind raced. You wanted to ask what was wrong, but something in his demeanor urged you to hold back. Instead, you focused on the rhythm of his breathing, the steady rise and fall of his chest. He needed this comfort, and for now, it felt like enough to be there for him. You didn’t move, not even when you heard the first series of knocks on your door. You just stood there, giving Mingyu the warmest hug you could offer.
When the second knocks came, followed by Mina’s voice calling your name, Mingyu pulled away. “Is that your ride?”
“Yeah,” you replied softly, almost in a whisper.
He smiled at you, tucking a few strands of hair behind your ear, lingering for a moment—thumb gently tracing the line of your jaw. “I’ll see you there, then.” 
“Alright,” you whispered, leaning in to place a chaste kiss on his cheek. “I’ll go first, okay? You can stay for as long as you need.”
“Thanks,” he said, kissing your lips softly.
In the car with your friends, your mind was preoccupied with thoughts of Mingyu. Is he okay? What happened? Why did he seem upset and sad? Where was he these past few days?
“Where’s Mingyu these days?” Mina asked, tugging on your elbow to get your attention. “You guys are close, right?”
“Huh?” you asked, surprised by the question. What you have with Mingyu wasn’t a secret, but you didn’t openly tell other people about it. Whenever someone noticed that you seemed close, you always told them that you were friends. And in a way, you were.
Mina tilted her head slightly, confused. “Was I wrong? I thought you two got along.”
“Oh, yeah. We’re friends.”
Mina said, “I haven’t seen him around campus in a while. Is he okay?”
“I think he’s fine, yes. Why’d you ask?” you replied.
“Well, something happened a few days ago,” Mina said, hesitating. She turned to Jill, your other friend who’s driving. “Jill, tell her what happened.”
You met Jill’s gaze in the mirror briefly. “Lea and I saw him getting slapped outside the campus.”
Your heart ached. “When was it? Who hit him?”
“It was probably his mom,” said Lea, glancing at you from the shotgun seat. “She looked like it and Mingyu got in her car after. Luckily there weren’t many people there and I think only a few noticed. But he seemed really depressed at the time.”
You leaned on the backrest of your seat, crossing your arms over your chest as you wondered about Mingyu. Is he having problems at home? Is that why he was upset?
“You’re worried. You must be close,” Mina said, probing for answers about your relationship with him.
“He’s my friend. Of course I’m worried.”
When you reached the party, you were stuck with your friends for a while, playing a round of drinking games with other people. When that was over, and you’d managed to slip away unnoticed, you searched the crowd for Mingyu.
You leaned against the wall, holding a half-full cup of punch, scanning the crowd. You spotted him nearby, talking to a group of friends, his usual easy smile lighting up his face. You smiled too, watching him. It was almost effortless with him, how he could make everyone around him feel comfortable. You’d noticed it before—Mingyu was always the life of the party wherever he went. 
But then you remembered what your friends told you, and the smile faltered from your lips. How much pain was he hiding behind those sweet smiles? Were they fake the whole time? Or were they real and was he only able to smile this much outside his home? What was going on with his life? With him? At this point, the most fitting question would be, ‘Who is he really?’
You were about to join him when you noticed someone approach him—some girl you hadn’t seen before. She was tall, pretty, with perfectly styled hair and an outfit that screamed confidence. She touched Mingyu’s arm lightly, leaning in to say something that made him chuckle. It was a small, polite laugh, the kind he gave when he didn’t want to be rude, but that didn’t stop the knot from forming in your chest.
You tried to ignore it, reminding yourself that it didn’t mean anything. But when she took another step closer to him, her fingers lingering on his arm, you felt a strange tightness, a familiar sensation that crawled under your skin. 
Jealousy.
Jealousy was a strange thing. You had never felt it before—not like this. The idea of losing him, even though you weren’t “together,” made your stomach flip. 
Mingyu’s eyes flicked over the room, and then they landed on you. For a split second, you thought about looking away, playing it cool. But the look in his eyes, the way his face softened when he saw you, stopped you in your tracks. He smiled—his real smile, the one that made his eyes crinkle at the corners—and the knot in your chest loosened a little.
Without a word, Mingyu took a small step back from the girl and made his way over to you. You tried to act casual, leaning against the wall as if your heart wasn’t racing.
“Hey,” he said, his voice warm and familiar. He stood close, the heat of his presence drawing you in.
“Hey,” you replied, trying not to let the relief show on your face.
“Enjoying the party?” he asked, leaning in slightly so you could hear him over the music.
“Yeah, it’s fine,” you said, shrugging. “You seem popular tonight.” You couldn’t help the slight edge in your voice, even though you tried to play it off as a joke.
Mingyu raised an eyebrow, clearly catching the subtle tone. “You mean her?” he asked, tilting his head toward the girl who was now talking to someone else. “She’s just being friendly.”
“Friendly, huh?” you replied, taking another sip of your drink. “Looked like she was being a little too friendly.”
Mingyu laughed softly, stepping even closer. His hand brushed against your arm, sending a familiar warmth through you. “Did you know I like my women territorial?” he teased, but his tone was gentle.
You scoffed, trying to hide the sudden rush of embarrassment. “Go find yourself someone territorial then,” you said, bumping your shoulder against his when you pushed past him.
Mingyu chuckled, turning to grab your wrist and stop you from leaving. “I don’t need to find one.” He tugged you towards him, hugging you from behind and planting a sloppy kiss on your cheek. “I have my territorial girl right here.”
You rolled your eyes, but your heart fluttered. “Get off me. Why are you doing this in public?” you chided, shaking him off but not putting in any strength to actually get away from him.
“Oh, is this not allowed?” he asked and you were about to fire a retort when you caught your friends’ gazes from across the room. You felt your cheeks flare, looking away to avoid Mina’s teasing grin.
“Get off.” You pushed him away and straightened your clothes.
Mingyu chuckled heartily, tugging your shoulder so you’d face him. He was smiling softly, a softness that made you feel seen in a way that was more intimate than anything else. “Don’t worry. I’m yours exclusively.”
You stared at him, trying to read what was on his mind. You wish you could, but it was impossible. 
The words hit you harder than you expected. Exclusively? He must be talking about the fact that you were exclusive fuck buddies. You wished he wasn’t, but you’d rather not have false expectations. 
“I know,” you said, your voice quieter now.
For a moment, neither of you spoke. The tension hung in the air between you, thick and unspoken. You didn’t need to say anything more. You both understood.
“Mingyu!” shouted someone from across the room. You both turned your heads in the direction of the voice and saw a guy waving for Mingyu. “Come on, man! It’s your turn!”
Mingyu chuckled, waving back. “You guys continue without me!” he shouted back. Then he took your hand, fingers lacing through yours, and gave it a small squeeze. “Wanna ditch?”
You shrugged.
“Come on. I know you want to leave and go for burgers right now.”
You felt a smile tug at your lips. “Did you just read my mind?” 
“No, but I have a manual in my head with your name on it, and that information is saved here,” he replied, pressing an index finger to his temple.
“You’re so obsessed with me. Aren’t you embarrassed?” you quipped, pushing off the wall and walking toward the door, feeling the familiar warmth of Mingyu’s presence right behind you.
The night ended in your apartment, as expected. In the heat of the moment, you set aside everything—your confusion, the questions, everything. There was only you and him in this moment of passion. Once more, you let yourself spiral into the momentary distraction of pleasure. And when the high slowly dissipated, you found yourself in the warm bathtub, with your back leaning on Mingyu’s chest.
“Are you staying?” you asked softly. “Over, I mean. Or do you need to go home?”
“I’d love to stay,” he replied. “Is that okay?”
“Of course it is.” You closed your eyes, content with his answer. “I don’t even want you to leave,” you blurted before you could stop yourself.
Mingyu chuckled lightly. “I don’t want to leave either. I wish I could just stay here. Forever, if that’s even possible,” he said and it left a bitter taste in your mouth.
“Oh yeah? Then why do you—” You bit your lip, feeling vulnerable all of a sudden. You weren’t used to confronting things like this. You looked up to meet his gaze, looking into his eyes. “Where will you disappear next time, Kim Mingyu?”
For a second, his expression shifted—just a flicker of something in his eyes, something you couldn’t quite read. “I’m not going anywhere,” he said, his voice filled with a quiet certainty. “Not unless you want me to.”
Your chest tightened. His words were simple, but the weight behind them hit you harder than you expected. How long had you been waiting to hear something like that? To know that, at least for now, he was yours, and he wasn’t going to slip away without warning like he had before.
You swallowed hard, trying to find your voice again. “No. I don’t want you to go.”
Mingyu smiled, that same easygoing grin that always seemed to make everything feel okay, even when it wasn’t. “Then stop worrying,” he said, his thumb still tracing those soft circles on your skin.
He didn’t make a promise, and maybe you should’ve asked for one. Because even though he stayed for a while, it didn’t stop him from fading away all over again.
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You were at Mina’s apartment, sitting on the edge of her bed while she packed her things. Beside you, Jill was cradling a bag of chips, pointedly refusing to share.
“I still don’t get why you’re moving out,” Jill grumbled, slapping your hand when you reached for a chip. She shot you a glare and continued, “Can’t you just tell your parents you don’t want to live with them?”
“Asian parents,” Mina sighed, shaking her head. “You wouldn’t understand.”
“Exactly! I don’t understand why they’d move to another state just to follow you here,” Jill said, incredulous. “That’s some next-level parenting!”
“They moved because they can’t stand being away from their daughter,” you chimed in, swiping a protein bar from Jill’s stash. “Also because they can.”
“Yeah, and that’s why it’s so confusing,” Jill scoffed, gesturing toward Mina. “My parents love me too, but they wouldn’t move out of their hometown just to keep me close. Are all Asian parents like hers? Do they really want their grown-ass kids living at home?”
You shrugged. “I’m not sure, but it happens more often than you’d think.” Your mind briefly wandered to Mingyu, remembering how he’d moved back in with his parents.
Before you could say more, music blared from outside the bedroom, cutting through the conversation. You looked up to see Lea entering the room, a towel draped over her shoulders like a makeshift cape. She carried a speaker in one hand, which she promptly set down on the nightstand.
“You say!” she belted, voice dramatic as she launched into the opening lines of a Hamilton song. “The price of my love is not a price that you’re willing to pay!”
The three of you groaned in unison.
Mina rolled her eyes, standing up to shove Lea out of the room. “Get out, nerd,” she said, feigning annoyance but unable to hide her smile.
“She’s sad. Let her grieve,” you teased, glancing toward the door where Lea continued knocking persistently.
Mina sighed and switched off the speaker, silencing the music. “She’s just overdramatic, that’s what she is. It’s not like we won’t see each other anymore.”
“Maybe you won’t,” you said, shrugging. “Who knows? Some people like to disappear and not say a word. Only to show up out of nowhere and act like nothing happened.”
Mina crossed her arms over her chest, tilting her head slightly as she observed you with a hint of suspicion in her eyes. “Where is this coming from?”
You shrugged, glancing at Jill who was giving you the same look. The chuckle you let out was awkward and defensive. “Nowhere. I’m just yapping for no reason. You know me.”
“Yeah, we know you,” Jill said, grinning playfully. “We know you’re hiding someone up at your apartment.”
“WHAT?” you exclaimed, backing away and laughing incredulously. “No. When did I ever! You’re crazy," you denied, snorting.
“Uh-huh? Then why haven’t we been invited there in like, six months already?” Jill interrogated.
You looked away. “I didn’t know you guys were keeping count.”
“Who is it?” Mina pressed, a teasing smile on her lips.
“No one,” you said briskly. “We haven’t talked in like, a week.”
“Oh, is it over before we even found out who it was?” Mina asked, appalled.
Before you could respond, Lea’s voice rang out from outside the door, full of flair. “You’ll be back! Soon you’ll see! You’ll remember you belong to me!”
Yeah. Mingyu will be back. Like always.
You went on with your life, like always. You’d learned to adapt. Classes came and went, each lecture merging into the next. On the first few times that Mingyu would disappear, you used to be distracted. Now you just went on as usual. Each day passed in a blur of classes, late-night study sessions, and the occasional laugh with friends.
“You still haven’t told us who this mystery man is. He’s not a professor, is he?” Lea questioned while you were at a cafe one evening.
“No! What the heck?” you said briskly, shaking your head at the ridiculous accusation.
“Is it Mingyu? You guys seem... close,” Mina teased.
“No,” you lied, blatantly.
Mina nudged your elbow. “Then why won’t you tell us?”
You hesitated, glancing down at your plate. “It’s just… it’s complicated.”
“Complicated how?” Jill asked, leaning in, her eyes glimmering with curiosity. “He ghosted you, right? You’re better off without him.”
“Yeah, I guess,” you said, but the words felt heavy in your mouth. You could not bring yourself to tell them that he’d done this before, and that he’d be back. When he does, you’d take him back like you always did.
You didn’t want to tell them how much you craved his presence, even if it was a source of confusion and pain. The idea of him laughing and teasing you again, the thought of being held by him, being one with him in body and mind—it all felt like a drug you couldn’t resist. How could you tell your friends that? They’d kill you if they can’t kill Mingyu first.
Mina reached out, squeezing your hand. “You deserve someone who’s all in. Not someone who just pops in and out of your life.”
“I know,” you nodded, appreciating their concern. You know they were right, but you still wanted to wait for Mingyu.
Just as the ache began to dull into a familiar rhythm, you were in the library, buried under a pile of textbooks. The quiet hum of studying students surrounded you, but you were in your own world, focusing on an assignment.
“Hey, stranger,” said a familiar voice that made your heart race. You looked up to find Mingyu and your stomach flipped as you caught his eye. He looked goofy—exactly as you remembered. “Missed me?”
“More like I forgot what you looked like,” you retorted, trying to play it cool.
He laughed, that warm, infectious laugh that always made your heart flutter. “Oh, come on! You know you missed my face.”
“Not as much as I missed your annoying habit of interrupting my study sessions,” you shot back, though you couldn’t suppress the smile creeping onto your face.
Mingyu grinned, leaning closer. “I can’t help it. What’s more interesting than me?”
Your heart swelled at his playful confidence, and for the first time in weeks, the tension in your chest eased a little. “A lot of things, actually,” you teased, trying to keep the atmosphere light.
“Lies,” he said pouting as he slid on the seat next to you, scooting so close that your shoulders were squeezed together. “So, any plans tonight?”
You rolled your eyes, but inside, you felt the warmth of his presence filling the void he had left.
Mingyu started to integrate himself back into your life seamlessly. He would swing by your apartment with snacks, distract you with silly anecdotes, and make you laugh until your sides hurt. You need not mention that most of these nights were spent with your limbs tangled underneath your sheets—half his weight pressing on you, your fingernails digging into his skin, as your moans blended with his soft grunts, creating a beautiful melody that made you lose your mind.
One afternoon, you found yourselves in the park, lounging on the grass under the fading sunlight. “So, what’s new with you?” he asked, propping himself up on his elbow to look at you.
“Not much. Just the usual—classes, studying, hanging out with the same friends,” you replied, your gaze drifting to the clouds above.
He raised an eyebrow. “Just that? No wild adventures? No spontaneous trips?”
You laughed softly. “You’re my wild adventures, Mingyu.”
Mingyu’s expression shifted, his playful demeanor softening as he studied your face. “I’m sorry for disappearing like that. I just needed some time to take care of stuff,” he explained, playing with the ends of your hair. “I wish I didn’t have to.”
His words hung in the air, and your breath caught in your throat. The way he looked at you made you feel special again—loved even. You could feel the warmth spreading in your chest, a blend of relief and yearning.
“I’m glad you’re back,” you said softly, your heart swelling with hope.
“I know,” he replied with a teasing smirk, but his eyes were sincere. You stayed like that for a while, just staring at each other, not quite understanding what your eyes were trying to tell each other, but content nonetheless.
“I should go,” you said, sitting up. Mingyu followed, holding your hand and resting his chin on your shoulder.
“Go where? I was hoping we could hang out again tonight. How does steak sound? I’ve gotten good at it recently.”
“I am tempted, but maybe next time. I made plans with the girls.”
“Can I sleep over tonight, then? I don’t wanna go home,” he pleaded.
You winced. “Mina’s sleeping over tonight.”
“Didn’t she sleep over the other day, though?”
“Yeah, well. She doesn’t have an apartment anymore. It’s a long story.”
Mingyu gasped playfully. “Is she moving in with you?”
“No, not really. But she’d be sleeping over sometimes.”
“Not your friend cockblocking me.”
You threw your head back laughing. “Dumbass. Go away.”
As the days turned into weeks, you settled back into the regular rhythm with him. Mingyu seemed lighter, more carefree. Every moment felt precious, as if you were both making up for lost time.
But behind the lighthearted moments, you could feel it—the underlying tension that often accompanied Mingyu’s presence. You pushed it aside, choosing to savor the time you had together instead of dwelling on what might come next.
Then, one chilly evening, it happened.
You’d heard somewhere before that one should expect disappointment. That way, the said disappointment would hurt less once it comes. They were only half-right.
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“What’s your opinion so far?” you asked, watching Seungcheol lean back in his chair.
He shook his head slowly. “I’m not really in a position to comment.”
“It’s fine. I don’t mind. I’m the one asking.”
He hesitated, choosing his words carefully. “I think you’ve got yourself stuck in an impasse. And honestly, it’s a frustrating one, because you knew what was going on, you didn’t like it, and you knew exactly what you could do to get out of it.”
“And your point is?”
“My point is, you could have spared yourself the trouble. You could have chosen differently—confront him, walk away, tell him to leave if he’s just gonna keep doing what he’s doing,” he replied.
You shot him a teasing smile. “Notice how you’re listing all the things I could have done, instead of what Mingyu should have done?”
There was a flicker of realization on Seungcheol’s face, clearly caught off guard. “Oh…”
You chuckled softly. “Exactly. That’s because people generally don’t trust men to be capable of picking up after their messes.”
“That’s actually a good insight,” he admitted with a nod. “So what happened after that?”
“You know what happened. It’s where I started when I told you this story. He called me after a week of radio silence, complaining about his annoying professor. Then I invited him over, we had sex, and we fell back into the same cycle of pretending like nothing was wrong. With him. Or with us. Then he vanished again.”
Seungcheol nodded quietly as he refilled your empty glass. For some reason, the gesture felt like a pat on your shoulder. In your mind, you thought that maybe this was his way of comforting you. That is—if he cared at all.
“That was the first time we fought,” you added, smiling bitterly at the memory.
At that point, you’d recognize the cues. You’d had Mingyu memorized and knew exactly from the way he was beginning to get detached that he was about to disappear again—late replies, making excuses and avoiding you at the campus. The thought of being abandoned by him once more struck a chord in you. Before you know it, you were confronting him, demanding to be heard.
“You’re doing it again,” you said, just as he was reaching for the doorknob.
Mingyu stopped, looked back at you, and blinked, confused. “Doing what?”
You gestured at him at the door. “This. The avoiding, the excuses.” Your voice was sharper than you intended, but you couldn’t hold it back anymore.
He shifted, clearly uncomfortable. “I’ve been busy—”
“Stop!” you interrupted. “Just stop it! Don’t lie to me, Mingyu. You think I don’t notice? You’re pulling away, and you always do this right before you disappear!”
Mingyu sighed, backing away from the door and facing you fully. He uttered your name—softly, pleadingly. “Come on, baby. Let’s not do this right now.”
“What? Am I supposed to just take it in stride while you disappear to God knows where without so much as a word? No. We’re doing this right now,” you demanded. The corner of your eyes began to sting with the tears threatening to fall. 
He reached to touch you but you recoiled, and he could only clench his fist then withdraw his hand. “I’m sorry.”
“Is that all you have to say?” you asked, appalled.
“I don’t wanna make excuses.”
“Who said you have to?” you asked quietly,  your voice unsteady. “You just have to be honest.”
“It's easier said than done!” he snapped, exhaling sharply as he held your gaze. You could see the hesitation on his face before he looked away and ran his fingers through his hair in frustration.
“What do you want from me, Mingyu?” you croaked out, trying to steady yourself on your feet. “Why do you keep doing this to me?”
“I don’t mean to hurt you,” he said defensively, reaching out again but you backed away.
“But you do! And I feel like absolute shit because… because…” The words got stuck in your throat. How were you supposed to explain the constant tug-of-war inside you? The feeling of wanting more but being too scared to ask for it? “Am I just someone you use when it’s convenient? Someone you need when you’re lonely, then toss aside the moment you’re done?”
“No! Don’t say that!” Mingyu growled, grabbing you by the shoulders and pulling you into a tight hug. You tensed at first, but then you felt it—the way his arms wrapped around you, not in anger, but in desperation. “I care about you. I care a lot about you.”
The force of his hold spoke louder than anything he’d said. His grip tightened slightly, but it wasn’t suffocating. It felt… conflicted, as if he was holding onto you for dear life but didn’t know how to tell you why. You felt his breath, unsteady against your hair, like he was battling with words that refused to come out.
But it wasn’t enough.
You stiffened in his arms, resisting the urge to melt into his warmth like you always had before. “Mingyu,” you whispered, your voice barely holding together, “if you care about me, why won’t you just be honest?”
He didn’t let go, but his grip faltered, his fingers loosening just enough for you to feel the uncertainty. His silence stretched on, filling the air between you, but he still couldn’t say it. He couldn’t give you what you needed—a promise, a reason, something to hold onto.
“Go,” you said, your voice raw with pain.
Mingyu faltered, his arms falling to his sides, his eyes pleading as if you’d just said something he wasn’t ready to hear. “Please…” he whispered, reaching out again.
You turned your back on him. “Just go, Mingyu,” you repeated, voice cracking as you struggled to keep your tears at bay. “Go. I can’t do this right now.”
With your back turned you didn’t see him linger by the door, hand hesitating on the knob. You didn’t catch the sadness clouding his eyes, the way his fingers twitched as if to reach for you one last time. And you missed the way he looked at you—torn, broken—before he slipped out of your life once again.
And with Mingyu gone, he didn’t see your legs give out beneath you. You collapsed onto the living room floor, where the two of you had spent countless hours together, making memories that now felt like they belonged to a different time. Your sobs filled the silence of the empty room, the weight of everything crashing down on you, and for the first time, you let yourself break at the place where you had once felt whole.
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You went on with your life, almost mechanical now with its repetition. Classes, study sessions, dinners with friends—it was all about keeping your head above water, distracting yourself from the void Mingyu had left behind. You had been through this before, so in some twisted way, you were used to it. He always came and went, and every time he left, it hurt less. The only difference was that this time, you weren’t sure if he’d ever come back. 
You missed him in the morning. Your eyes searched for him around campus all day. And your soul ached to be held by him at night. Your friends noticed your distracted state, and they had asked once but didn’t press on when you’d hinted that you didn’t want to talk about it. They figured that, eventually, you'd open up. In the meantime, you stuck to your routine, pretending everything was fine. And in a way, it was. Your tears eventually dried up and the restless nights decreased. The pain had dulled, and you were starting to accept that maybe this was for the best. 
But it seemed like fate wasn’t done toying with you yet. One evening, you were lounging on the couch with Jill, Lea, and Mina. You were halfway through a movie you’d been meaning to watch, a quiet evening like so many before when your friends had kept you company so you weren’t left to your sad thoughts.
Then your phone rang. At first, you thought it might have been a mistake, that you were hallucinating when you saw Mingyu’s nickname on your screen.
“R18 plus plus plus? Who’s that?” Mina teased, noticing the name flash on your phone. “A fling?”
“It’s no one,” you muttered, still staring at the screen.
“Aren’t you gonna pick it up? It’s kinda loud, love,” said Jill, motioning to the TV.
You stood up, heading to the kitchen to answer the call. You knew you shouldn’t, but a part of you—the part that still hoped, still craved his presence—wanted to hear what he had to say.
“Hello?” you answered, your voice shaky.
“Hi.” The voice on the other end was unfamiliar, and they said your name uncertainly.
“Yes. Who is this?”
“This is Dan. Your number was on the phone so I called. Can you come to the bar downtown? It’s right across from 00 University. The owner of this phone had a little too much to drink. Can you come pick him up?”
For a moment, you couldn’t speak. Mingyu? You hadn’t heard from him in weeks. “I… yeah, I’ll be there,” you managed, glancing at your friends. “Give me twenty minutes.”
You ended the call and stood, grabbing your coat. Mina raised an eyebrow, but you avoided her gaze. “I have to go,” you said quickly.
“Now, now. You’re not ditching us for Mr. R18 plus plus plus, are you?” Mina teased again, but you weren’t in the mood for jokes.
“R18? Is that a booty call?” Lea chuckled.
“It’s not what you think, guys.” You sighed, offering a quick, apologetic smile. “I’ll be right back.”
Without waiting for their protests, you rushed out the door, your heart pounding. You were confused and surprised. Mingyu drunk and alone in a bar? This was so out of character for him. He’d never done anything like this before.
When you arrived at the bar, you spotted him immediately. Slumped against the counter, his head hanging low, he was a mess. His hair was tousled, his eyes half-closed, and his cheeks flushed with alcohol. The confident Mingyu you knew was gone, replaced by this hollow, drunken version. You approached him, appalled at the sight of him looking wasted.
“You must be her,” asked the bartender. 
You nodded, glancing at Mingyu. “How long has he been like this?”
Dan sighed. “A few hours. He was drinking alone, staring at your number. Said he wanted to call, but wasn’t sure if he should.”
Your heart twisted at that. He wanted to call? He was thinking about you? But then, why hadn’t he?
“How much did he drink?” you asked, eyeing about a dozen bottles of beer in front of him and hoping he didn’t drink all of those by himself.
Mingyu stirred at the sound of your voice, his head lifting slightly. He tried to focus on you, but his eyes were hazy. He mumbled your name. “...is that you?”
Dan gave you a sympathetic smile. “He’s all yours.”
“Yeah, it’s me.” You sighed, wrapping an arm around him, trying to lift him to his feet. He leaned heavily against you, his body sagging.
He whispered your name again, slurring the syllables, and for a moment, something inside you softened. But no. You couldn’t do this again. Not like this.
With a struggle, you managed to get him outside. “Kim Mingyu, you’re gonna have to pull it together, or I’ll leave you here.”
Mingyu groaned, trying to straighten up. “I missed you,” he mumbled, his words barely coherent. He stumbled, reaching for your face but missing, his hand landing on your shoulder instead. He rested his head on your shoulder, taking a deep breath. “Missed you so much.”
You winced at the words, unsure of what to feel. Did he mean it? Or was it the alcohol talking? “Come on. Let’s get you home.”
In the cab ride back to your apartment, he kept trying to pull you closer, his head resting on your shoulder, his breath warm against your neck. Every time he said your name, it felt like a knife twisting in your chest. How could he hurt you so easily, and yet make you feel so needed at the same time?
When you got him inside, your friends were still there, their faces full of questions. Jill stood first. “What’s going on?” she asked, though the answer was obvious.
“He’s drunk,” you said simply, guiding him to the couch. “I’m sorry. Can we call it a night? I promise I’ll explain later.”
They exchanged looks but didn’t argue. Lea gave you a quick hug before leaving, followed by Jill and Mina. “Text us if you need anything,” Mina said quietly, her eyes lingering on you as if she wanted to say more.
Once they were gone, you turned to Mingyu, who had collapsed onto the couch. He was mumbling your name again, his eyes barely open.
You knelt beside him, brushing the hair from his forehead. “You’re a mess, Mingyu.”
He smiled lazily, his hand reaching for your face. Then he chuckled. “Dan, you bastard, what did you put in my drink? Why am I seeing things?" he drawled out the words.
“You’re not seeing things,” you chided, albeit softly, as you pushed his hand away.
You sighed, pulling away from his touch. You started to help him out of his jacket, his body warm and damp with sweat. As you worked, he kept trying to pull you closer, his hands wandering over your body, his lips trying to find yours but clumsily landing on different spots in your face.
You swatted his hand each time, and pushed him away as much as you could. You stripped him down until he was left with only his boxers. Afterward, you gave him a blanket and were about to leave when he grabbed you by the waist.
“Stay,” he whispered.
Just like that, the tears you thought had dried up started welling your eyes again. You stood there, letting yourself get enveloped by his warmth again. If only he could stay like this—open, vulnerable, needing you. But deep down, you knew this wasn’t real. Tomorrow, he’d be gone again.
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The morning light filtered through the curtains, soft and gentle. You stirred awake, feeling a familiar ache settle deep in your chest. The first thing you did was rise out of bed and go to the living room. Mingyu was still asleep on the couch, his arm draped lazily over the edge, his chest rising and falling in slow, steady breaths.
Quietly, you walked over to the couch. You sat down on the floor next to him, folding your legs beneath you. Your eyes traced the familiar lines of his face, softened in sleep. He looked peaceful—vulnerable even, like he wasn’t the same man who’d disappeared for weeks without a word.
How many times have you told yourself not to expect more? That he wasn’t yours to keep. He was only yours in stolen moments—when the world outside didn’t exist, and it was just the two of you, tangled in each other. But those moments were fleeting, like a breath you couldn’t quite hold on to.
You sighed, brushing a loose strand of hair away from his forehead. “Damn you, Kim Mingyu.”
What if this time was different? What if, just once, he stayed? Hope was a dangerous thing. Every time you thought you were free from him, he pulled you back in, sometimes with nothing more than a look, a word, or the weight of his presence. 
Mingyu stirred, his eyelids fluttering open slowly. His gaze found yours almost immediately, bleary but aware. For a long moment, neither of you said anything. You just looked at each other, the silence heavy with unsaid words, with everything you were too afraid to admit. The hurt. The longing. The quiet hope that maybe, just maybe, he wanted you as much as you wanted him.
His eyes lingered on your face, as if he was trying to read your thoughts. You felt exposed under his gaze, like he could see through the walls you’d built to protect yourself from him.
Then, without a word, he reached for you. His hand, warm and tentative, cupped the side of your face, and you leaned into his touch instinctively, closing your eyes for a second as your breath caught in your throat. When you opened them again, his gaze was intense, searching.
His lips brushed against yours, soft and familiar. Then, his grip on you tightened, and you found yourself sinking into him. For a few moments, it felt like nothing else mattered. The pain, the confusion, the nights spent wondering where he was—none of it existed here.
You knew this wasn’t safe. Letting him back in, letting him hold you, kiss you—it was a cycle you couldn’t break. But you didn’t pull away.
He guided you to the bed, his hands sliding over your skin with tenderness, as though he was afraid you’d slip away from him. You weren’t sure who needed who more in this moment—whether he was seeking comfort from you, or whether you were the one hoping he would stay, if only for a little longer. Maybe it didn’t matter.
Your clothes fell away slowly, piece by piece, until there was nothing left between you. His touch was familiar, yet it felt different somehow—softer, more cautious. You shivered as his lips trailed across your collarbone, your breath hitching in your throat.
He then lay on his back, guiding you to straddle him. You’d miss everything about him these past few weeks, but you didn’t know how much you longed for him until he was deep inside you. It hurt a little, but you didn’t falter, you just stayed there for a second, adjusting to the stretch that you hadn’t felt in a while.
Mingyu sat up, his hands supporting your back as he pressed his forehead against yours. “You okay?” he asked, his lips ghosting over your skin. You nodded, moving ever so slightly. Mingyu kissed the side of your head. “Good girl.”
You didn’t reply, too caught in the moment to think beyond the feeling of his hands on you, and his manhood inside you. Soon you were breathless on top of him, grinding rhythmically, back arching with each motion. His hands were as strong as they had always been, gripping your hips as he guided your movements. You did not contain your moans, knowing Mingyu preferred hearing them—that he loved hearing you.
Just as you were nearing release, Mingyu shifted your positions, pinning you underneath him. He stared into your eyes for a moment, caressing your cheek before he kissed your open mouth. And once again, he thrust into you. The room was filled with soft sounds—quiet breaths, gentle whispers of each other's names. Everything felt slow, like time had stretched out just for you two, giving you space to exist in this fleeting moment.
There was no rush, no frantic urgency. Just two people, tangled together in a slow, deliberate, and passionate sex driven not solely by lust but by something more powerful. 
Love. You felt it in his every push, every kiss, and every touch. It was different this time. His hands lingered longer, his lips sought yours more often, and the way he whispered your name—it wasn’t just desire. It was more, and you felt it deep within your chest, like an ache that had finally found its release
And when it was over, you lay together, his arms wrapped around you, his heartbeat steady beneath your ear. You traced lazy circles on his chest, feeling the rise and fall of his breathing. His body was warm, his presence grounding you in a way that made you want to believe he could be yours.
“I love you,” he said suddenly, his voice quiet but clear.
You froze, your hand still on his chest as the words hung in the air. You weren’t sure if you’d heard him right. Slowly, you lifted your head to look at him, your heart hammering in your chest. “What did you say?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
Mingyu’s eyes softened, a faint smile playing on his lips as he repeated the words that made your breath catch. “I said, I love you.”
Your heart swelled, but with it came a surge of doubt. Could you believe him? Could you trust these words from the same man who had vanished from your life without a second thought so many times before? It felt like standing on the edge of a cliff, one step away from free-falling into something that could either break you or save you.
You wanted to say it back. The words were on the tip of your tongue, but they felt too heavy, weighed down by all the times you’d convinced yourself that this moment would never come. Instead, you settled for leaning up and kissing him, slow and soft, your lips lingering against his. Maybe this kiss could say what you couldn’t. Maybe it could be enough to bridge the gap between hope and reality.
When you pulled back, you looked at him again, the uncertainty gnawing at your chest. “Do you really mean that?” you asked, your voice smaller than you intended. “Or are you just saying it because… because of what just happened?”
Mingyu’s eyes darkened with something unreadable. He reached up, cupping your cheek, his thumb brushing lightly against your skin. “I mean it,” he said, his voice rougher now, like the words were harder for him to say than he let on. “I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t.”
His eyes were heavy with exhaustion, but there was something else there too—something softer, more vulnerable. He didn’t say anything. He didn’t need to. You both knew what this was, even if neither of you was ready to admit it.
You pressed another kiss on his lips, your hand cupping his face. Maybe this time would be different. Maybe.
Or maybe not.
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Seungcheol’s eyes stayed locked on you, you could see curiosity and concern written on his face. You just stared right back, keeping your lips tight.
“That’s it?” he asked, his voice soft, almost disbelieving.
You nodded. “That’s it.”
He blinked slowly, clearly not satisfied with your answer. He’d been so engrossed in the story that neither of you had noticed how late it had gotten. 
“It can’t be,” he murmured. “What happened after?”
You let out a breath, shrugging as if it didn’t matter. “We talked. Well, fought, mostly. I asked him what he wanted—if he’d finally commit.  In the end, he didn’t pick me. After everything, I thought he would. You know confessing his love and all that. But… meh.” You rolled your eyes. “That’s how it went.”
Seungcheol leaned in, his eyes narrowing. “So you walked away?”
“I don’t wanna go into details anymore, but yes I walked away with my dignity intact. I mean,” you paused to laugh. “I couldn’t keep letting him do that to me, could I? I had to stop it. I was better than that, though it took a while for me to finally grasp that fact and walk away.”
Seungcheol nodded slowly, but there was something unsatisfied in his expression. “Well, good for you. You deserve that. You deserve better.”
“I know,” you chuckled, but the laugh felt forced. “It’s funny, looking back. I acted so stupid for him. But I’m just glad it’s over now, you know? That chapter is closed.”
He tilted his head, his brow furrowed in thought. “That’s good. Although I dare say, your storytelling is a bit, I don’t know… anticlimactic?”
“Is it?” you asked like it wasn’t something you already felt too. You forced a shrug. “Maybe. But that’s how it went. Things kept circling back to the same pattern and this part is basically the same. There’s only so many times you can replay the same argument, you know? I just skipped it,” you added with a forced smirk, hoping it would distract him from prying any further.
Seungcheol observed you for a minute, and you wondered if he could see right through you. Seems impossible. He didn’t really know you until today, and you were a pretty decent liar.
“Right,” he said, his tone softening, though the doubt hadn’t entirely left his face. “What’s next then?”
You blinked. “Huh?”
“I mean, who’s next?” he clarified, leaning back in his chair. “Kim Mingyu is not the only guy you’d ever dated, is he?”
You let out a short laugh, but it was strained. “No, there were others. But it’s late, Mr. Choi. The lady needs her sleep.”
He shot to his feet, his face immediately contrite. “Ah, of course! I didn’t mean to keep you up.”
“I’m sure you didn’t. If you want to hear more, you can ask the front desk for me. Tomorrow’s my day-off so I have time. We can also discuss the fee you promised,” you said, smiling and then narrowing your eyes at him. “That is, if you haven’t forgotten about it.”
“I remember.” He smiled. “Good night then.”
“Thanks for listening,” you said with a small wave as you turned to head toward your room.
As you made your way back to your quarters, thoughts of Mingyu swirled in your mind. You’d lied to Seungcheol. The ending between you and Mingyu wasn’t anticlimactic at all. It had been messy, filled with bottled-up anger and days wallowing in misery. But you’d never admit that to Seungcheol. Sharing a failed romance with a stranger was one thing; baring the ugly truth of just how miserable and pathetic you felt back then? That was something else entirely.
At the time, you thought he’d finally let you in. He did, for a moment. Mingyu had opened up about the weight of familial expectations, how it crushed him to follow a path that wasn’t his. He talked about the people and dreams he had to leave behind. And he confessed that the reason he couldn’t choose you, after all this time, was that same fear—that one day, he’d have to turn his back on you too.
“You don’t have to,” you said, placing a hand on his arm. “I’ll be here. Wouldn’t it be easier if you had someone to rely on?”
He’d smiled at you then, a smile filled with gratitude and maybe something like love. “Thank you. I appreciate that.”
And so, you stayed. And Mingyu? He stayed the same—thoughtful, goofy, always consistent. Sometimes, he’d come to you in low spirits, and you’d let him lean on you in silence, even though he never fully shared his feelings. You fell deeper in love with him, slowly realizing that everything felt emptier, harder without him. You barely noticed time fly by, but you did notice that Mingyu no longer disappeared. He no longer detached himself from you. He was there all the time, even on days when he didn’t feel like himself.
Freshman year passed and you went up with him at his family’s estate to spend the break. He lived in a big house but his parents weren’t home the whole time you were there. It was nice to get a glimpse of his life, of the place he grew up in and the person he was before you met him. You spent time hanging out, making love, and being each other’s support system.
But despite how wonderful it was, despite the burning passion, the cloud of uncertainty loomed over you while you were there. The happiness you felt was so overwhelming, it scared you. It felt too good to be true, like the calm before an inevitable storm.
This storm would come earlier than either of you expected. And it came in the mail.
“What is it?” you asked, wrapping your arms around Mingyu’s seated figure. You tried to peek into the letter, but he put it away.
“Nothing important,” he replied, holding your arm and rubbing it as he looked up at you. He smiled at you and then pressed a soft kiss on your lips. “Where were you?”
You pointed at your head, wrapped in a towel. “In the bath,” you said, straightening up and walking toward the bed to undo your hair.
“You were gone for an hour.”
“Yeah. I was actually waiting for you to join me,” you said, not hiding your disappointment.
He groaned. “Oh, man. You should’ve told me.”
You grimaced. “No, you should’ve looked for me when you noticed I was gone.”
He tucked the envelope in the drawer before jumping in the bed with you. He pinned you down, making you squeal. Then he started peppering you with kisses all over your face. When he caught a whiff of your neck, his expression immediately shifted from goofy to naughty.
“I’d love to do it in the tub, but the bed isn’t such a bad idea too,” he lilted, undoing the ribbon of your robe.
“The bed is the best place to do it, dumbass.”
Mingyu hummed in satisfaction. “I love it when you talk dirty to me,” he said, making you laugh. 
That afternoon was spent being one with each other too, like the previous ones. When you fell asleep, Mingyu was beside you, his head leaning on your chest while you play with his hair. But when you woke up, it was already dark and the spot where Mingyu laid was cold.
You pushed yourself upright, wrapping your robe around you as you padded across the room, calling out his name. “Mingyu?” The sound echoed back in the silence. You checked the bathroom, the living room—every corner of the house, each step feeling heavier than the last. No sign of him.
You tried his phone next, only to find it sitting on the nightstand. Thirty minutes passed, then an hour. Your calls for him became more frantic, though still unanswered. It was only when the housekeeper returned that she offered some explanation.
“He went out earlier, ma’am,” she said, smiling kindly. “He didn’t say where, but I’m sure he’ll be back soon. Mr. Mingyu would never leave you alone.”
Right, he wouldn’t. Yet that wasn’t reassuring at all. This housekeeper might have watched Mingyu grow up, even took care of him during those years, but she had no idea what Mingyu had put you through. Still, you wanted to believe in him.
The hours passed, and the next morning came. He hadn’t come home yet. You waited until the evening, and the following evening on the next day, and the next, and the next. Still no Mingyu. The house felt hollow without him, as though the walls themselves knew something was wrong.
It was on the fourth day, when your frustration turned to desperate curiosity, that you found the letter tucked away in the drawer of his desk. Your fingers trembled as you unfolded it—an acceptance letter to a university abroad.
He hadn’t mentioned this. Was he planning to leave? Had he already left?
You’d looked for him and asked everyone at his house for help but no one seemed to know where he went. They even had to contact his parents and you didn’t really expect them to know either, but it was frustrating to hear them say it.
“Have you checked his flat, ma’am?” the housekeeper asked.
You blinked. “I thought he moved out of his flat?”
The housekeeper shook his head. “No, ma’am. He’s been living here again, but that place in the city still belongs to him. Maybe he’s there?”
It wasn’t like him—not anymore. Ever since the two of you had gotten closer, you thought the days of him pulling away without warning were over. You had let yourself believe that, anyway. But now, you felt the creeping sense of something breaking, something final.
You commuted back to the city and went straight to his flat. You hated this feeling—the waiting, the uncertainty. It felt like standing on the edge of something crumbling beneath your feet.
And now here you were, in front of his door, heart pounding as you knocked. You didn’t expect him to answer. But, he did.
Mingyu stood there, looking disheveled, dark circles under his eyes like he hadn’t slept in days. The sight of him was both a relief and a frustration, all the hurt and confusion swirling inside you.
“We need to talk,” you said, pushing past him into the apartment before he could say anything.
He closed the door behind you but didn’t move. “I know,” he muttered, his voice hoarse.
You turned to face him, crossing your arms. “What’s going on, Mingyu? You disappeared. Again. After everything we talked about. After you said you didn’t want to keep doing this.”
He ran a hand through his messy hair, looking anywhere but at you. “I’m sorry,” he said, but there was no conviction in his voice.
“That’s it? That’s all you have to say?” Your voice cracked despite your efforts to keep it steady. 
Mingyu finally looked at you, his expression torn, like he didn’t know how to put what he was feeling into words. “I don’t know… I needed time. I couldn’t—”
“You always need time, Mingyu,” you interrupted, your frustration boiling over. “You say you don’t want to do this alone, but then you push me away every chance you get. Do you even want me in your life?”
“I do! I’ve never wanted anything else! But I can’t… I—” he paused, running his fingers through his hair. “I can’t keep dragging you into this.”
“You’re not dragging me, Mingyu. I’m here to stay! But if we’re gonna keep having this… if you’re gonna keep doing this to me, then what’s the point?” you asked, the words heavy with your anger and frustration. “I’m sick of this, Mingyu. Aren’t you?”
His eyes widened, and you could see the conflict in him. But he didn’t answer. He didn’t say anything, and that silence hit you harder than anything else.
You swallowed the lump in your throat, taking a step closer to him. “If you don’t want me, just say it. Tell me to go, and I will. But if you want me to stay…” Your voice faltered as you searched his face, desperate for any sign. “Tell me to stay, Mingyu. Say it.”
For a long moment, the room was filled with nothing but the sound of your uneven breaths. You waited. He opened his mouth to speak, then closed it again.
“Mingyu, please…” you pleaded, holding back your tears. “Just say ‘don’t go,’ and I won’t,” you added, shaking your head.
Mingyu reached for your face, staring at you with tears in his eyes. Then he pressed his forehead against yours as he sobbed. “I’m sorry.”
Your heart sank, the answer clear even though he never spoke the words. You took a shaky breath, nodding to yourself. “Okay,” you whispered, wiping away a tear that rolled down your cheek. “I get it.”
You backed away and then turned toward the door, your chest aching with every step you took. But before you could reach the handle, you stopped, glancing back one last time, hoping—praying—that he would say something, anything, to stop you.
But Mingyu stayed silent. And with that, you walked out with finality in your stride.
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To say you were a mess after that was an understatement. You were a wreck—miserable and sad, wandering through the days like a ghost of your former self. You ran to your friends, crying in their arms for hours, the kind of raw, gut-wrenching sobs that left you breathless. You thought you’d only cry about it for a few days and get over it. But it went on for a whole month.
Some nights, after too many drinks, you’d find yourself dialing his number, the alcohol loosening the grip of reason in your mind. “Mingyuuuu,” you’d whine into the phone, your voice slurred and pathetic. “I love you so much! Take me back!”
The next morning, you’d wake up to the shame of your drunken confessions, staring at the ceiling with the weight of regret pressing down on you. You’d replay the conversations in your mind, cringing at how desperate you sounded, wondering how you let yourself fall apart so completely.
Your friends did their best to pull you out of the darkness, but every attempt felt futile. You’d join them for outings, but you were barely present, laughing too loudly at jokes that didn’t register or staring blankly at the world around you. One night, they dragged you to a party, insisting you needed to have fun. But there you were, clinging to your drink, watching everyone dance and laugh, while the memories of Mingyu spun in your mind. Once the reality set in that he was no longer there to ditch the party with you, you stumbled to the bathroom and locked yourself in, sobbing into your hands as the beat thudded through the walls.
Even the simplest tasks became challenges. Your studies slipped away; assignments piled up, and your grades plummeted. You’d sit in your lectures, staring at the board but absorbing nothing. Friends would express their concern, but you brushed it off with a half-hearted smile, not wanting to burden them any more than you already had. 
Eventually, you hit a breaking point. On one particularly dark day, you sat alone in your room, surrounded by empty cans and bottles and crumpled tissues. The realization hit you like a freight train: you couldn’t do this anymore. You weren’t just grieving—you were drowning.
In the haze of your despair, you made the impulsive decision to skip the semester and move back home with your family. The thought of facing another day in the city without Mingyu felt unbearable. Packing your things felt like burying a part of yourself, but it was your only option. Every corner of your apartment did nothing to help your move on anyway.
You took one last look of the place where you made the most memories with Mingyu. And as you closed the door, you hoped it would also close that chapter in your life.
Your parents welcomed you with open arms, concerned and confused by your sudden return. You pretended everything was fine, but they noticed the shadows under your eyes, the way you flinched at the slightest mention of your time at university.
In the quiet of your old room, you often found yourself staring at the ceramic bears on your nightstand, remembering the small joy of building a family for these inanimate decors. Your friends tried to reach out, but you brushed them aside, too ashamed to admit how far you had fallen. They understood, giving you the time and space that you needed, knowing you'd be back once things were all better.
And as the weeks passed, something began to shift. The sun shone a little brighter, and the weight of your grief slowly lightened. You spent time with your family, rediscovering old hobbies and connecting with friends who reminded you of who you were before Mingyu. Slowly, you started to feel like yourself again. You laughed more, shared stories, and realized that life still held moments of joy, even in the absence of him.
One day, while cleaning your room, your eyes caught your little bear family, focusing on the grizzly and panda Mingyu had gifted you. Their faces seemed more cheerful now and you felt a bittersweet pang in your chest. 
Where could Mingyu be right now? How is he? You had no idea, but you wished he was in a better place than before. Somehow, you wish you could at least extend a hand to comfort him, even as a distant friend.
Then an idea came. You picked up the grizzly and the panda, memories flooding back—of laughter, of warmth, of love. But you knew that holding onto them was holding you back. And right now, you didn’t really need them anymore.
You wrapped the figurines carefully in bubble wrap and wrote a short note:
“I’m sending these with a happy heart and I hope that instead of bitterness and sorrow, they will bring a smile to your face, just like they did when we first met them. Thank you for the memories. Know that I do not regret meeting you, and if I had to do it again, I would. Although, maybe I’d make better decisions then. You’ll always have a space in my heart, Gyu. I hope you’re in a better place—both in your heart and mind. Love, me <3”
As you dropped the package off at the post office, you felt lighter, liberated. The storm that had raged within you had dissipated, replaced by the gentle promise of new beginnings. You smiled to yourself, knowing that while the past would always be a part of you, it no longer defined you. You were ready to embrace whatever came next. You’re young, you have a whole life ahead of you.
And if you happen to run into Mingyu again in the future, you hope he will be in better circumstances. Whatever he was going through, you wished he’d get over it and be genuinely happy.
[fin]
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hyperions-light · 2 months ago
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woAH I heard people are hating on Neve which is super cringe! Neve positivity time!!
I am in love with her because
1. She has an impeccable sense of fashion, she never misses, could make a paper bag look good
2. Docktown sucks so bad, like major Kirkwall vibes, and she loves it SO MUCH
3. If you give money to the people asking for it on the streets in Docktown, sometimes Neve will check in with them and make sure they have a place to stay it’s so sweet !!!
4. She cannot cook at all. Only eats fried fish. Boils her coffee. Zero domestic skills, completely perfect
5. She loves Bellara so much, she’s such a good friend ;-; She finds all her serials and helps her try to work out the mysteries! She gets her goat cheese! She comes to Cyrian’s funeral ;-;
6. If you wander around Docktown with her in your party you can stop and talk to her regular contacts and she will check in with them <3
7. She works alone because she’s scared that the people who try to help her will get hurt =(
8. She’s not afraid of Spite and she refuses to see Lucanis as a monster or treat him differently, even after he almost kills Illario.
9. She helps Taash figure out their gender stuff and she is so supportive and helpful <3
10. The WAY she talks to people who are hurting… like even though she’s so cynical, personally, she never tells people to give up on others, she’s never sarcastic or scathing when people are in pain. I took her on Taash’s final mission last time, and her voice ;-; She wanted to help so badly, but she couldn’t do anything. She reminded them that everyone was there for them. She loves SO much, so intensely.
11. She does not expect anyone to help her, and especially if you don’t save Minrathous she’s skeptical, but she’s so thankful for Rook’s help when they give it. She’s so fucking lonely, man! She thinks she has to do it all herself, because everyone else in the world and especially in Minrathous has shown her over and over that they don’t care about the people she loves, the people like HER. She’s not rich, she’s not famous or powerful or well-connected, she’s just using what she has to try and help people!
12. Manfred canonically doesn’t like nicknames, but he lets Neve call him ‘Fred
Neve Gallus, the woman you are <3
Edit: When I posted this someone immediately made some rude comment so here’s some more stuff to love about Neve Gallus!
13. She investigated the mystery of the candlehops and she was so serious about it! Just like the wisps in the Lighthouse!
14. When she was a kid she didn’t know what she wanted to be when she grew up and she HATED it lol
15. She got her best coat as a gift from a grateful client!
16. She keeps her tiny little apartment because they gave her a good deal on the rent and she doesn’t want to lose it
17. Halos keeps trying to give her fish for free but she insists on paying him <3
18. That joke she made to Lucanis about having an extra leg if he needed one lol
19. She misses the sound of the ocean, and sometimes when she wakes up in the Lighthouse she hears it for a moment
20. The way she explains everything so patiently to Taash about Tevinter and Docktown and the way status symbols work; the way she is always trying to use her skills to help the other members of the team!!
21. How she makes sure to check up on that kid whose father was doing demon summoning stuff and make sure that he’s alright ;-;
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imagining-in-the-margins · 4 months ago
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Your Specialty (S.R.)
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Summary: Spencer sees his significant other comforting a child and it makes him wonder. A/N: Written for my best friend on her birthday. Couple: Spencer Reid/GN!Reader Category: Comfort Content Warning: Minor self-deprecation, implied difficult childhood, crying Word Count: 1k
MASTERLIST
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Spencer loves you every day. There is never a doubt or a hesitation. With each glance, he finds something new to add to the ever-growing list of reasons why he is right to love you.
But there are some moments where even he, in his seemingly infinite wisdom, is unable to put into words the way he feels when it comes to you. In those moments, all he can do is silently soak in the unknowing.
It was a quiet moment, all things considered. There was no more bad guys to be caught, no more bloodshed to be had. Still, there were tears, as there usually were when you were around.
It wasn’t your fault. You just have a way about you that makes people feel… loved. Sometimes for the first time.
Spencer peers through his open office door to find you. You are on your knees, eyes locked with the young boy standing in front of you.
His small body shakes with incoherent sobs. He is held steady only by your gentle hands cupping his face. Despite the sight, you are smiling. A calm, subtle curve that holds him up in another way.
From where he is, Spencer can’t hear your words. But he can still feel the relief. He finds himself mirroring you both, with deep inhales fighting against the knot his throat. The air comes out warm and trembling.
In that moment, as he watches you comfort something small, he is a little boy again. He is the one lifting his arms in a silent request to be loved in a simple way.
And he can feel it. He feels your arms as they wrap around the little boy and lift him gently from the ground.
The feeling is almost too much, but he doesn’t look away. He watches and waits patiently for you to let the little boy go.
He waits for you to notice, to quickly come to him before your own trembling hands are noticed by the boy being carried away to what Spencer still hopes will be a happily ever after.
Spencer watches you the entire time. His own mind races, struggling still to find words to explain the feeling in his chest.
He’d almost gotten it when you interrupt the thought with a laugh.
“What is it?” you ask.
Any eloquence vanishes and is replaced with a stammer.
“You’re uh… you’re good at that,” he says. "Comforting kids."
Somehow, it sounds better than it did in his head.
Unbeknownst to the depths of the compliment, you glance over your shoulder to see the boy still watching you.
You recognize the same expression on your lover’s face.
“Kids are easy to love,” you answer.
He accepts your humility. He meets the modesty with his own typical self-deprecation.
“You should’ve seen me as a kid.”
Beneath the words, you hear the uncertainty. That stubborn, relentless fear that there is something rotten to be found in his heart.
You narrow your eyes as you inspect him. His shoulders square under your scrutiny. You look at him, carefully reviewing each wrinkle and freckle. You tilt your head to look at him in another way.
And you find nothing at all rotten.
“I would’ve liked that,” you tell him in earnest.
Emboldened, but still afraid, Spencer dares to take another step forward.
“What do you think you would’ve said?” he says like it’s a joke.
This time, your pause is a couple beats longer.
You look at the man in front of you and try to imagine him with teeth too big for a tiny frame. You imagine unruly curls and thick, crooked glasses perched over innocent eyes.
You look at the man you love and you see it. A small boy staring up at you in his oversized suit. Always trying to be both smaller and bigger than he was meant to be.
“I’d tell him,” you say, unsure of your own words, “that he’s strong and clever, and he shouldn’t have to try so hard to prove it to everyone.”
Spencer sucks in a breath that betrays his aloof demeanor. The words hit him like a swift blow to the stomach. But even with the pain, he hopes you’re not finished.
You’re not.
“I’d tell him that I know he’s trying his hardest, and sometimes things are bigger than us and…”
You bite your tongue to stop tears from welling. You breathe in sharply, reaching up to place both palms against his reddened cheeks. You laugh as they shift towards a goofy grin despite tears.
“I’d tell him that everything’s going to be okay,” you say confidently.
“Oh,” he chuckles; a sad but necessary sound.
"Yeah."
Gentle thumbs wipe each droplet that manages to spill from big golden brown eyes. The same as you had moments before, you catch what you can of his sadness and turn it to comforting warmth across his cheek.
Spencer bites his lip, looking down at your feet before daring to look at you again. Because when he does, he loses his breath and his sense once more.
“I, uh... I think he would’ve liked that,” he confesses.
“I know,” you whisper with a genuine remorse. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there.”
Spencer accepts the apology but refuses to stay in the past any longer.
“But you’re here now,” he says quickly.
“Yeah, I am,” you laugh in return. “Good luck getting rid of me now.”
But letting you go is the furthest thing from his mind. In fact, he pulls you closer until there is nothing but atoms between you. Strong arms embrace you and his clever words muffle against your hair.
“I wouldn’t even dare to try.”
Together, you settle into the silence. You share your warmth without restraint. Just two bodies swaying in a simple and symbiotic embrace. You enjoy the comfort, the company, the lack of need for words to describe it all.
And once you feel he’s had his fill, you sigh against his shirt.
“You know, I’m going to get through to that little boy eventually.”
Spencer halts his step as he starts to laugh.
“Is that a threat?” he asks.
Without moving from your place against him, you smile.
“Watch out, Dr. Reid,” you hum. “I’ve been told I’m good at this.”
Spencer accepts the warning with a smile.
“Yes," he chuckles. "Yes, you are.”
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(Tell me what you thought of this fic here!)
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shybluebirdninja · 2 months ago
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Brood Alert
Summary: Logan locks himself in the bathroom for two hours after seeing you laugh at a joke some random guy made.
Pairing            : Logan Howlett x Gf!Reader Note                : fluff
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You and Logan had just gotten back from dinner with some friends—one of those nights where everything felt relaxed, easy. You were still smiling, replaying a dumb joke someone made at the table, one of your friends—a harmless one, really, just a joke about the waiter dropping a spoon.
But Logan? He wasn’t laughing.
By the time you stepped inside the house, kicking off your shoes and tossing your jacket onto the couch, Logan had already disappeared down the hallway. You heard the bathroom door click shut.
Frowning, you padded across the wooden floor, glancing toward the closed door.
“Baby?” you called out, tapping on the door lightly with your knuckles. No answer. You jiggled the knob—locked. Seriously? You sighed, already getting the feeling he was in one of those moods.
“Babe, what are you doing in there?”
Nothing. No response. Just dead silence.
You pressed your ear against the door. The faint sound of water running, then stopping, then… silence again. The air inside the hallway was stuffy, stale from the day’s warmth still lingering.
You rubbed your temples, already exhausted by the impending drama. You could almost feel the pout from the other side of the door.
“Baby, don’t tell me you’re brooding in the bathroom.”
More silence.
This man had fought wars, torn through enemies like paper, and yet here he was, barricading himself in the bathroom because of a joke. A joke! You could picture him now, sitting on the edge of the tub, arms crossed, his signature scowl plastered across his rugged face. He was such a baby sometimes.
“Logan. Come on, babe.” You groaned, leaning against the doorframe, looking down at your mismatched socks. “What are you doing, reading a novel in there? Taking up a second career as a bathroom model?”
More silence.
“Alright. I’ll give you another five minutes before I’m breaking this door down.”
Nothing.
You pushed yourself off the door and wandered back to the living room, grabbing the blanket off the couch. As you plopped down, pulling the soft fabric over you, you reached for the remote. TV it was, then.
Forty minutes in and you couldn’t even focus on the show—your mind kept drifting back to Logan’s ridiculous behavior. Sulking in the bathroom because he thought you laughed a little too hard at some guy’s joke.
Time ticked on. You checked your phone. It's been two hours. Are you freaking kidding me?
Finally, you stood up and marched back down the hallway, irritation bubbling up inside you. Two hours had passed since he went in there. Two! You weren’t sure if you were more angry or amused at this point.
“Baby,” you banged on the door, harder this time. “Get your ass out of there or I’m calling Charles and telling him his big bad Wolverine has been locked in a bathroom for two hours ‘cause he’s jealous of some guy’s bad joke.”
You heard a low grunt from inside. Something clattered—probably a bottle of shampoo—and then footsteps.
The lock clicked, and Logan finally swung the door open, looking every bit like a grumpy bear disturbed from hibernation.
He stood there, shirt rumpled from sitting too long, his hair all tousled and wild. His expression was somewhere between annoyance and guilt, arms still crossed, shoulders tense.
His eyes, though? A little sheepish. He knew he was being ridiculous, but Logan wasn’t exactly known for admitting he was wrong.
“You done?” you raised an eyebrow, trying hard not to laugh at his stubborn face. He didn’t answer, just grunted again and turned, brushing past you and heading toward the kitchen without a word.
You followed him, shaking your head. “Logan, babe. Are you seriously mad because I laughed at that guy’s joke?”
Logan grabbed a beer from the fridge, the bottle making a soft hiss as he popped it open. He took a long drink before finally speaking, his voice low and gravelly.
“Wasn’t just the joke,” he muttered, leaning against the counter. “The guy wouldn’t shut up. Kept lookin’ at you like he had a shot.” He frowned, his brow furrowing deeper as he set the bottle down on the counter with a soft thud. “Ain’t like I’m jealous. Just… he was annoyin'.”
You bit your lip to keep from laughing. “Oh my fucking God, babe, the guy was just being friendly. It wasn’t that deep.”
He glanced at you, his eyes narrowing a little, like he wasn’t quite convinced. “You were laughin’ too much. Don’t like it.”
You walked over to him, standing on your toes to kiss his cheek. “You’re such an idiot, you know that?”
Logan grumbled, but you could see the corners of his mouth twitch like he was trying hard not to smile. “Yeah, well…”
You tugged at his shirt, pulling him down to your level, your lips brushing his ear. “I only laugh for you, big guy.”
That finally got him to crack a smile—barely. He let out a rough chuckle, shaking his head. “You’re a pain in the ass, babe.”
“Yeah, but I’m your pain in the ass.”
He took another swig of beer, his arm coming around your waist, pulling you close. “Damn right you are.”
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blue-jisungs · 9 months ago
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hi omg I loved all ur “u sleep with plushies” for each svt unit, may I req a hhu ver ??? all of the other units were so cute😭💗
you still sleep with plushies ♡
author's note. thank you hehe!!! it was so fun to do, sorry it took so long tho:(
vcu ver && perf ver
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┆彡 SEUNGCHEOL [ 승철 ]
he never considered it a problem?
like he’s been at your place a couple of times and noticed the plushies, thinking it’s just really cute :(
i mean come on, some of his members heave weirder habits (like sleeping with their eyes open…)
so when you asked him if that bothers him, seungcheol was offended that you even thought!!! about it!!!
however . . .
when he does sleep at your place, you two all cuddled up and comfy
and then… he wakes up only to see your back
okay, it happens… maybe you were uncomfortable
BUT THEN HE SEES YOU’RE CLUTCHING A TEDDY TO YOUR CHEST!!! INSTEAD OF HIM!!
he’s so sulky, good luck with that …..
you explain that it’s just your comfort plushie and that you cuddled it out of habit :(
so cheol insists that he can be way better than it and begs you to let him stay one more night to prove his point ☝️
and he kinda does, he becomes your new giant, warm and loving teddy bear <3
┆彡 WONWOO [ 원우 ]
wonwoo noticed before you could tell him
well, you really thought you were slick when you didn’t bother hiding them because you hoped he’d think they’re there for the aesthetics
or when you two went shopping and your eyes widened upon seeing a cute plushie:(
yeah, he knows
but he thinks it’s really cute, especially if you have that one specific plushie ever since you could remember and you always sleep with it
so not to make a fool out of yourself in front of his friends, you don’t take it with you when you go on a trip with them
after whole day of fun, it’s time to sleep in the cabin
and wonwoo notices that you’re constantly squirming around, unable to fall sleep
and you confess that it’s because you didn’t bring your plushie:(
so he offers to be the plushie for the night, reassuring you that he doesn’t mind and you can cuddle him as much you wanna
and that may have been a risky decision because ever since…… well, he is one of your plushies now ^__^
┆彡 MINGYU [ 민규 ]
you decided to invite your boyfriend over and share a secret with him
mentally, you got ready to get teased about it
but you when mingyu entered your bedroom he didn’t even notice the plushies 🧍‍♀️
he was just happy that u let him in your personal space and looked around your room with hearts in his eyes, like a kid in a candy store
"so you don’t mind the plushies?" you mumbled, plopping down on your bed and holding one for emotional support
"the pl– oh? ah, baby…" he groaned and swore his knees got weak; you’re just too cute for his own good
he doesn’t mind, at all - which you’re kinda surprised but happy
he does get pouty if you cuddle a plushie to sleep instead of him >:T
sometimes will spray his cologne on your (or his) favorite one so you could feel like he’s here when he’s out having schedules ☹️
might steal a one or two to his apartment, esp puppy ones 💔
┆彡 VERNON [ 버논 ]
i mean we all know nonnie, he’s really chill about everything (welp, except bugs but—)
so when you were facetiming him once and you noticed your plushies are on camera, you started panicking
"yo, what is it? did something happen?" he asked, noticing something’s wrong
"yeah… no… well…" you stuttered, not sure how to answer "did you see that?"
"what? that big spider behind you?" he stuttered and soon after laughed upon seeing your scared face "sorry, it was a bad joke… hey, don’t get sulky…"
"i meant my plushies…" you mumbled and pulled one closer
"oh them? yeah, and? you always have them. say hi to gerard by the way" vernon nodded
what.
there’s no gerard in your collection but later on you realised he meant (plushie name)
like really,, he doesn’t care in a way that – he doesn’t mind you having them
he does care about them, though :(
will put a blanket on them if he thinks they’ll get cold or carefully reads all the corners of the internet before putting them into a washing machine:(
masterlist <3
taglist. @mirxzii ,, @primoppang ,, @l3visbby ,, @nicholasluvbot ,, @planetkiimchi ,, @weird-bookworm ,, @slytherinshua ,, @kazmura ,, @laylasbunbunny ,, @mon2sunjinsuver ,, @eternalgyuuu ,, @rubywonu ,, @haecien ,, @mine-gyu ,, @nonononranghaee
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