#like my previous post i was just browsing my stuff and i found this but then i remembered goncharov because they are mobsters

[brainmoss]

Is no one really going to comment on Goncharov's musical spin off (!!!) and it's hilariously spot on portrail of Andrei's and Ice Pick Joe's relashionship in just a few seconds of the background while Goncharov and Katya are dealing with their own stuff? 🤣

[faeriekit]

Health and Hybrids (XXV)👽👻💚

[I can't remember the original prompt posters  for the life of me but here's a mashup between a cryptid!Danny, presumed-alien!Danny, dp x dc, and the prompt made the one body horror meat grinder fic.]

🖤Chapter navigation can be found here🖤 Click to browse previous updates.

💚 Ao3 Is here for all parts 💚 (now featuring mediocre mouseover translations, only available on a computer)

Where we last left off... Tim pulls a fast one on Batman for their mutual benefit. Everybody giggles. Danny goggles.

Trigger warnings for this story:  body horror | gore | post-dissection fic | dehumanization (probably) |  my nonexistent attempts at following DC canon. On with the show.

💚👻👽👻💚

(Additional TW: I think this counts as a panic attack ngl)

On the one hand. The room Danny’s in has a killer view of the earth from the moon.

The wall is basically just one big window. Danny is also apparently permitted to mash his face into the glass and ogle the Earth from Space for as long as he wants until the stinky dad, whoever he is, finally emerges from the depths of the building.

Diana’s the only one beside him today. She looks nice—nicer than usual, in her armor and bright clothing rather than soft scrubs and hair net. She can push his chair without getting tired—she could probably fly and carry him too, if she had to, so. Danny’s maybe counting on her liking him if this stinky dad tries to be mean.

So. Diana (nice lady) and Danny (half-dead ghost boy) are quietly seated in a dim, peaceful board room, absorbing the early morning (?) space radiation when the door hisses open across the room.

In the doorway is a long, dark, shadow of a man.

…And the green guy!!

Okay, if the stinky dad man brought a friend to this meeting the same way Diana’s meant to supervise him, Danny feels like he’s been lawyered up for the sake of some kind of court trial. This is not fair. Danny wasn’t able to review his case with his legal representation before this.

Well. Danny fumes. Whatever. His lawyer is Diana, the most powerful living being he’s seen ever in his life, and she can totally kick the green guy’s ass. Hell, Danny could probably kick the green guy’s ass.

...You know. If he wasn’t. Sick.

The stinky dad guy looks a lot like the blob his kid drew him as. That’s kind of neat—his suit is all black with little to no variation, which sort of just washes out the colors Danny might have been able to see if his eyes were still good. He’s very quiet, which is nice, and he’s very not-trying-to-read-Danny’s-mind, which is even better.

The two sit. Danny’s already in a wheelchair, so he just lets Diana wheel him to the table. The lady sits beside him in the spinny office chair.

Hello, the green guy opens with, already toying with the edges of Danny’s aura.

Danny sends back an abundance of ass-kicking emotions.

…Alright then, the green man capitulates, the barest hint of bemusement quickly stifled.

Good. Danny is mean. He’s awake enough to be mad about other people touching his aura from any end of his personal bubble.

But then the green guy…says stuff to the dad guy? And it’s very? Quiet?

Explanations, the green guy says. The image of a sign language translator at a baseball game floats over to him, and—

…Oh. He’s translating. For Danny.

That’s…nice? Nicer than Danny expected, honestly? Most of the time, people are perfectly happy to misinterpret him. It was kind of the way of the world at this point. Getting blamed for stuff, getting accused of stuff…

Man. If they turn out to be indoctrinating him for secret war purposes, at least they’re going all in. Danny might actually. You know. Like it here. A little.

He squirms in his chair, and tries not to look at anyone in particular. Diana—the lady who’s been nice to him—makes as if to straighten his hair for him, and remembers at the last second that he doesn’t like to be touched.

And sure. Danny doesn’t want to be touched. By bad guys.

…But Diana’s been really nice to him, so. Maybe. He scratches at the back of his neck, and ducks his head down—and remembers to use his words. “Yes,” he consents verbally. He can’t make eye contact. But he can…let her. Brush his hair back. A little.

Diana asks something long and complicated—and the green guy presses an image of Wonder Woman asking permission, being kind, being gentle­—up against the edges of Danny’s awareness.

Danny nods at the floor instead of at the lady. It’s fine. She’s fine. It’s fine.

And her fingers carefully brush through the front end of his fringe, and Danny. Danny is so normal about it. He doesn’t even cry or anything. Not even in front of his friend’s stinky dad.

And she doesn’t do it like Mom did it. And she doesn’t ruffle his hair like Dad did.

But it’s. Nice. And she doesn’t pull.

…And she doesn’t hit.

Danny eventually leans back into his wheelchair. It’s a little bit embarrassing to be halfway in and halfway out, but. Whatever. The scary-looking-dad with the earsies on his helmet has his own teenager. He should understand what it feels like to get emotionally weird with your teen in a public place. If he doesn’t, well...he wouldn’t be a great dad, then, and his opinion would suck anyway.

Based on what Danny knows about the masked kid, Danny isn’t sure the guy would tolerate a bad dad. The teen seems kinda unhinged.

The man says something, and the green guy presses a number of translated feelings against Danny’s awareness: Greetings. Questions about Danny’s wellbeing. Curiosity, but not demanding.

“…Hello,” Danny says back, and. Waves.

The man waves back. He’s got little claws on his gloves.

…Like a cat? Is it to go with his ears? Danny wonders about the possibilities of the guy being cat themed. It’s possible, presumably.

So…they want to know how Danny’s doing? Danny shrugs, and he glances at Diana, since, you know, she could probably fill them in? She does speak their language. And she’s been here the whole time.

The lady leans in close to him, black hair falling out from behind her ear. “What do you want to say?” she whispers into her ear, hand covering her mouth from their watchers.

Uh. It’s up to…Danny?? Somehow??

Danny winces. “…Good?” he tries, unsure if the word he uses means okay or fine or well. “…Not…hungry?”

“Very good,” Diana agrees, a little louder. She looks proud. Being not hungry must mean a lot to her, then. It means a lot to Danny too—he can remember the sensation of his stomach rubbing against itself, friction pulling raw at his insides as acid ate at him.

It was. Bad.

It was bad.

Danny’s glad he’s not there anymore. Anyway, there’s a guy in the room who reads minds, and Danny doesn’t really want to share that memory with anyone ever; especially someone who could turn it back on him.

The stinky dad says something else, but he uses words too thick and long for Danny to understand. The green guy translates, pure conceptual recall brushing against Danny’s outer aura—Needs? Wants?

…Danny frowns.

Danny looks at Diana, who looks back at him. Wants, needs…? What?

“Do you need aniþing?” Diana whispers to him, which. You know. Mostly makes sense.

Does Danny…need anything? He has medical care, he has food, he has water, he has toys and brain teasers, even…he has people to hang out with, he has people who stretch his legs with him so that he can go back to normal…heck, he doesn’t even have to clean his own waste bag. There’s people who do that for him.

Like. What more could Danny ask for?

Danny shrugs. He just wants to heal up and run away. Maybe…maybe, if Diana is real and not just pretending to like him to keep an eye on him, she’d let him visit her later or something. Danny would do what Dani doe—did. What Dani…did. And he’d just go a bunch of places and come back when he wants to.

But. No. There’s nothing he really needs right now.

The pointy-eared guy and the green guy share a look and a couple quiet words. Danny flares his annoyance into the silence, but all he gets is a silent Apology/Apology, which isn’t answers.

Ugh. Danny leans over the arm of his wheelchair. This is kind of super boring; it’s more boring than it is frustrating, even.

The stinky dad guy says something else, and Danny feels the push and pull of something double ended tugging on the outer edge of his aura. Additional/information, giving/take?

Danny really wishes he’d brought a fidget toy or something. His nerves are ramping up but all he can do is contort his fingers together, feeling the strain in and the joints click as he pushes them together and twists them apart. They want…to ask him questions? No, they’re already asking him questions. They want Danny to…give them questions??

…Danny doesn’t really want to. Still, he probably…should.

“The…space station,” he says, using the wrong word for their big space building but not knowing the better one; “Is this…where…why is it?”

The black-caped dad grumbles something vaguely approving. A tablet pops out of the table—spooky—and the guy starts drawing on it, explaining all the way. The green guy simplifies more of the verbally complicated concepts for Danny as they go.

Anyway. So they’re in space because it’s their…job? Danny thinks? They do…fighting stuff. Which Danny knew. Because he’d seen them on the news.

But it looks like they do a lot of things—they clean up after storms, and chase regular bad guys and super-bad-guys instead of just big ones. And they stop bad aliens from hurting people on Earth.

The green guy shifts from a green-looking, pointy-headed, red-eyed form to a warm, brown, human skin tone. And even. Like. Human clothing.

Danny stares.

…And the guy immediately takes back his natural form, his body physically shifting and morphing, which, fair, but holy crap. He’s living, on Earth. He passes as normal, on Earth. No one snitches on him. No one’s selling him to the government for parts. No one’s trapping him in a cage and not feeding him.

This guy works here, and everyone lets him.

Danny shifts in his chair. He…he wants that. He wants that. He wants to pass as human and not have to worry about…about anyone getting rid of him. He wants to go back to school. He wants to hide, and never ever not ever be found by anyone or anything when he does.

“I want that,” Danny says. There’s no inflection. He feels dead. He is dead, but usually he doesn’t feel it. “What do I do for…that.”

Help/Searching/Finding? the green—alien—questions, but there’s nothing for Danny to find. He knows exactly where everyone he loves is—and unless they’re already fully formed in the ghost zone…

…Well. Danny has forever to wait and see if he’ll see his friends and sister again. Maybe he’ll find them again one day, in a world purely green and glowing.

He shakes his head.

The next question comes…softer. Gentler. The mental push feels more like a breeze than a gale. Friends…Home/family?

The question comes tinged with all sorts of sensations that Danny’s suppressed—warmth, security, happiness, oxytocin, fondness, pride and being the source thereof, warmth and love, love, love—

Danny’s sweating. He can’t stop. His hands are shaking faster than usual—he kicks the brakes off his chair with the heels of his palms, and jerks the wheels back, pulling away from the desk—

He’s halfway across the room before he hears the noise. It’s just. Noise. It’s Diana, carefully shushing the loud heartbeat churning in his ears, hands on his hand, trying not to cage him but trying to keep skin on skin contact. Her hand is on the back of his hand, and on his shoulder.

“It’s okay,” Diana whispers. Danny’s shaking. His whole body is shaking. “Shhh, sh sh sh. It’s alright, it’s okay.”

It’s not it’s not it’snoit’snotit’sNOT. His sister is dead. His friends are dead. His parents sold his captors the equipment to catch him and they didn’t care if he got hurt doing it and now they’re DEAD. They tore open his hometown down the middle just to catch him, they stole him—they took his dead parent’s things as tools to hurt him—they HURT HIM and there isn’t—he can’t—he can’t—

Something is holding him down, and Danny thrashes. He has arms, but they’re injured—he has legs but he needs a tail and he—and—

He cries into Diana’s arms, sobbing and wailing. It’s a miracle that the building stays together. She holds him tighter, and he cries even harder into her soft under-layers.

He wants to run away. He needs to run away. Someone is holding him, and he can’t even flicker through her the way he wants to; his core is already too strained just from talking.

Danny’s sick. He’s dying. He’s—

“Take a breath,” Diana whispers, calm and sure. She models it for him. Danny gasps in air. “Good. Lete it out slow. As bobbels in a straw.”

He tries to copy her he does and she’ll be so angry if he can’t do it right on the first try but she lets him try, over and over again, until Danny’s able to stop hiccupping and leaking tears and ectoplasm all over her and realize that she’s holding him like a baby. Like. Actually cradling him against his body armor.

…You know what. He’s too tired to even be embarrassed. Screw that. Danny leans all the way over her and goes completely limp. Someone else can deal with his him for a little bit.

She does. Diana just…holds him.

It’s nice. Mom and Dad used to do that for him, when Danny was still…more human, he supposed. More than he is right now.

Something else touches his hand. Danny looks blearily downwards.

The teenager’s dad gets to his knees and takes Danny’s hand—and he doesn’t need the translation to understand.

“I’m sorry,” the man says, over and over again. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

Danny blinks sleepily. What does his friend’s stinky dad have to be sorry for? He didn’t even do anything to Danny in the first place.

Danny won’t remember, afterwards, being wheeled back to his room for a nap. They must have wheeled him back, though, because the alternative is that Diana tucked him into bed like a baby, and that’s just kind of embarrassing to even think about for too long.

[rainbowsky]

Hey, I'm new here and i love your blog! I was wondering if the boys see couple\sexual edits of them together and if it makes them nervous but then it hit me that they probably aren't seeing what i see on western social media. Do you have any idea if those types of homosexual posts get censored in China?

Hi Yingyangorly! Thanks, I'm glad you're enjoying my blog!☺️

I have a huge long, like, ridiculously long post in my drafts related to this topic, hopefully coming soon.

But to answer your question, I think it's impossible that GG and DD would fail to see at least some of what's posted about them as a couple, whether sent to them by friends, family or staff, or whether stumbled upon or intentionally sought out/browsed by them. It's inevitable they'll see some of it, particularly things that get a lot of attention.

I talked about this a bit a while back. GG and DD have said in interviews that they have fake social media accounts (and of course they would - how could you go anywhere or do anything on social media without one if you were famous?), and this kind of discussion has happened somewhat in relation to fan comments, etc.

You can check out my previous post for more on that stuff.

As for sexual edits, etc., like any other content I've no doubt they've seen some of it - it's inevitable they would - but I doubt it worries them all that much. It's highly unlikely to ever impact them directly, because ultimately it's not really about them, is it? It's about the creators who make it. Any backlash is more likely to fall upon creators, not GG and DD.

And just as a reminder - it's not illegal to be gay in China, it's not illegal to post homosexual content, etc. Such content is censored on TV and other broadcast media, but not online.

Porn is very illegal in China, but that's mostly only selectively enforced. In fact, China produces a lot of porn and a lot of smutty fiction and all of it is illegal, but it still manages to thrive fairly well.

Explicit content of any kind is technically not allowed on Weibo but it's still out there - although most of it is pretty toned down and tame. Actual porn of sexual activity isn't ubiquitous there, but lewd fan art, fan fic, edits and memes can often be found.

All platforms globally have rules against explicit content, and they're just as poorly enforced everywhere. I suspect a lot of that is because social media engagement makes money, and sex sells. It's not really in the interest of platforms to completely shut down all such content - even if it was possible to do so.

The supertopic rules likely have more impact on fan behavior in this regard than the Weibo TOS does. Those rules forbid mentioning GG and DD by name or tagging their accounts, and forbid sexualization, pornography, feminization and fixating on body parts. However, that's only within the supertopics. Ultimately people are free to post whatever they want on their own accounts, and they do.

Given how many antis and solos are out there trying to take down the turtle fandom, the fact that these things manage to stay up for as long as they do speaks to how weak the enforcement is. There are definitely people out there who will report things that offend them.

This is, in fact, how the whole 227 thing got started. A bunch of solos decided to report an explicit fanfic to the government, and things spiralled out of control from there.

Could lightning strike a second time and another 227 be sparked from some of this explicit content? For a lot of complicated reasons I'm not going to get into here (it would be a very long post), I don't think that's likely.

227 was a special, very complicated situation that I don't think is likely to happen the same way again. Timing and a lot of the other factors that played into its blowing up the way it did - all of that is unlikely to align in such a way. Especially since everyone in C-ent is a lot more cautious and vigilant after 227.

GG and DD are both in good standing with the government (as is evidenced by their inclusion in government and nationalistic projects), and that's a factor that will have some influence. And no doubt they and their teams have learned a lot from past experience, and have already planned for how to protect them in various scenarios that could arise.

They also have the power to have content relating to them removed, to sue content creators, to shut down the supertopics if they want to, etc.. If they feel at risk, they have a lot of recourse. The fact that we aren't seeing this happening should reassure us that it's probably fine.

We have to realize that GG and DD are surrounded by highly skilled, highly paid professionals whose entire job is to protect them and their interests. They're both in a much safer place than they were 4 years ago.

I trust them to know what's best for them and handle their affairs accordingly. We as fans shouldn't waste time hand-wringing over things that are completely outside our control.

As for what's within our control - it's up to every individual to make our own choices about how we'll represent GG and DD online.

More on that angle if/when I ever finish that other post.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hi there, Steph! I have a little question about the way that you handle the (queued) reblogs of your previous posts. Obviously you usually reblog posts the next day but what about older posts from years back? Are they also still following some kind of rotation or queue or do you just go through your own post history ever now and then, looking for stuff that looks thematically/interesting?

Whatever your system is, it is working great for me! I found a lot of great fics and meta-posts from your older posts as well and I probably wouldn't have found those just by browsing on your blog. I am just curious to maybe get a little glimpse behind the scenes!

Thanks for all your great compilation work over here!

Hi Nonny!

So my NEW posts always get a "next day reblog" and a queued "final" reblog (usually with "queue" in the tag name), which usually posts a month or two later depending upon how long my queue is, so that the content is seen at least three times guaranteed.

Lately though, because I haven't been getting a lot of asks, I have been just... going through my offline file of my blog (a 384 page Text Edit document) by just doing keyword searches of whatever comes to my mind and then tag them as "filler content". I used to never do this, as many come to my blog because it's visibly updated daily. But lately I just haven't had the spoons or mental capacity to answer long asks and instead I just pick whatever comes to my brain. Mostly my "classic posts" (ie. posts that I received a LOT of feedback for in the past or posts that are STILL making the rounds years later and I happen to see it cross a mutual's dash so then I reblog) or if I see a topic is popular, I'll find my old meta masterposts about said topic and try to get new eyes on them, since I didn't realize until this year that not everyone knows I used to be more known for my meta writing. Many people like the rabbit holes they can end up in reading my meta. Sometimes I'll go on my art blogs (@stephratte and @stephdrawsjohnlock) and find some old art I'd like people to see. It really does just depend upon my mood in the moment.

I try to fill up my time-slots in my queue hourly between 8am and 4pm DAILY, so that my blog is ALWAYS active and a place people can come and be entertained. I like having a very active blog. In turn, though, that comes with the cost of me spending EVERY NIGHT going through my blog daily, FILING EVERY SINGLE POST on the aforementioned Text Edit Document, and then setting up the queue accordingly. And if I don't answer a new ask, I just randomly type whatever I'm in the mood to re-read on my own blog and search for filler content. It's a lot of work but I think it's worth it since I get a few comments that mention that they are happy that I am so active around here.

That said, I'm SOOOOO happy to hear that my older posts intermingled with my new ones are doing it for you. Like, you have NO idea how pleased I am to hear this, because the immense guilt I feel for NOT having new content has been eating at me for months. I just... DON'T have the energy these days to ensure new stuff all the time AND work on making new fic lists for each Sunday. I have a nearly-ten-year backlog of blog here, I should really take advantage of that.

Thank you so much for giving me that validation I feel I needed for it, and I'm happy you enjoy your time here! This is SUCH a kind comment, and filled me with sprinkles and sunshine. 💜🖤

[jo-harrington]

Standard Operating Procedures 1.02 (Eddie Munson x Store Manager!Reader)

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Summary: You get to meet Eddie's friends.

Previous Part: Standard Operating Procedures 1.01

Warnings/Themes: AU where the Upside Down doesn't terrorize Hawkins. Reader works at the Claire's at StarCourt. Eddie works at TapeWorld. Fluffy, silly, mutual pining, slowish burnish. Allusions to more of Eddie's trauma/shitty people being shitty that will probably come up later. Some silly, goofy "boys will be boys" moments with Corroded Coffin.

Note: I keep introducing new characters and I'm sorry. (I mean it's only 2 at this point...3? I't doesn't matter. It's my party and I will have a million side characters if I want to.) But Welcome to SOP 1.02, the second of what will be many nights out with Eddie and Store Manager.

I know I'm posting this one after Corrective Action, but it technically comes before it. I'm working on writing chronologically...it is just taking a hot minute. I'm like a Time Lord, my brain doesn't work that way. One day we will catch up to Closing Time and then it doesn't have to be mutual pining and cute friendship/early relationship stuff, it can be love and fluff and probably some more angstier angst and filthy smut.

Besides I just love their goofy little date nights. And I needed to write something fluffy and lighthearted since this weekend seems to be angsty chapter fest elsewhere in the fic world. (iykyk. I love it, I just need some silliness.)

You can find my masterlist here for more featuring our resident Store Manager and all of my other random Eddie Headcanons.

Please do not interact if you are not 18+.

Enjoy!

---

“What time are you off tonight?”

“Uhhh,” you looked up at Eddie as he jogged into the store, partially out of breath. You were halfway through a piercing, but couldn’t possibly be annoyed at his appearance; he was quickly becoming one of your favorite people, after all.

Besides, it was another long, busy day; you and your ASM had both been doing back-to-back piercings for at least two hours, and there was a practically endless line at the cash wrap. With the (unexpected) success of the store, you were allowed to hire some new associates, one of whom was currently training on the register.

You welcomed the distraction that Eddie brought.

“The regular time? Why?" you asked, then paused for a second. "And sorry, but did you run up here?”

“Escalator is out of order,” he shrugged, still panting. Then under his breath “fuck, I shouldn’t skip out on gym so much.”

“The smoking is probably not doing you any favors either,” you tutted in a stage whisper and he rolled his eyes. "Give me like...a few minutes to finish up and then we can chat? And I swear to god, just wait in here please and not near the door; my conversion really sucks today."

He held up his hands innocently before shuffling off to the side to browse. You watched him for another second--admired how handsome goofy he looked--and then you turned back to the preteen in your chair. 

“Ok…you ready? Just one more time. One…two…” The girl winced a little bit as the needle punctured her ear. “I know it hurt but it wasn't too bad right? And you'll look so cool!” 

The soft “pretty” that came from her when you presented the mirror to show her the finished product a few minutes later was enough to make you smile brightly. After a quick "thank you" she skipped to the checkout line to proudly show her new earrings to her father--a man who clearly watched too much Magnum PI if the mustache and Hawaiian shirt were any indicator.

Once the station was cleaned up and you checked in with the rest of your team, you turned your attention to your visitor. You grabbed some random accessory off of one of the fixtures as you approached him.

"Excuse me sir, I think I found exactly what you need to complete your look today," you said in the entirely too bubbly way you usually spoke to customers. The one that you knew, after Eddie confessed during lunch the other day, made his skin crawl a little.

"It's a customer service voice."

"It's creepy."

"Oh yeah? And what's that?" he asked, eyebrows raised as he turned to you. From behind your back, you revealed a dressup headband that had fluffy red hearts wobbling on springs on either side of the head. You stood on your toes and jammed it onto his head, unable to contain your laughter as he leaned back to catch a glimpse of himself in a nearby mirror. "Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, but I think this really works."

He turned back to you and fluffed his hair a little. Then he held his hands below his chin while fluttering his eyelashes prettily.

“So what’s up?” You asked once he took the headband off. “I thought you were off on Fridays.”

“I am,” he nodded. “For Hellfire. But...it's a special circumstance. There's an early screening of this new movie--Day of the Dead? Did you ever see Night of the Living Dead? Of course you have, it's a classic."

"Sure."

"This ones, like, the last one of the trilogy." He had admitted to you last week that Return of the Jedi was his (secret) favorite of the Star Wars trilogy and that the last movies in trilogies were, in his opinions, the best. "Anyway it's gotta be good."

"It does sound cool." You agreed.

"Well I'm glad you think so, because I asked Jeff to get an extra ticket..." he paused and you could see the nerves settle in. "I figured...you might want to join us? If you're free after work?” 

He rambled on about his friends and how “Gareth got his license, finally, which is why we're really going out” and “Dave always screams at jump scares but it's hilarious.” Trying to convince you that they were good and cool, but you could guess what he was trying to say underneath it all.

They’re cool guys and I’m a cool guy. We're going to see a cool movie, so please don’t say no. 

After two Sunday afternoons and a handful of lunches spent together, it was still baffling to see how bashful he could become. How he still tripped up on his words and gave you every single opportunity to turn him down. To turn him away.

He told you some people were shitty to him for repeating senior year. And he worried about you finding out about some reputation he had. But even if you hadn't witnessed it yourself yet, it wasn't hard to put two and two together that, overall, people weren't very nice to him.

You knew you had been lucky; the only people to really bully you were related to you. But you still couldn't understand how people could be so cruel, especially to the absolute sweetheart in front of you who was currently rocking on his toes, and fidgeting with his rings, and avoiding your eyes as he just kept talking.

Eddie was funny, witty, cute, thoughtful, and probably hopped up on too much sugar all the time.

"...and I know it probably doesn't sound fun to go to the movies with a bunch of high school guys but--"

"No it sounds like a great time," you agreed.

"Really?" He had that deer-in-the-headlights look that you were secretly starting to enjoy. "It's not stupid?"

"No," you shook your head. "And I want to meet your friends. You kind of talk about them a lot. So it'd be nice to put faces to names."

"They might bully you for listening to Duran Duran," he warned.

Was he trying to get you to turn him down?

"Then don't tell them about that!"

"I might need to be bribed," he hummed cheekily, clearly unable to keep a smile off of his face.

"Gosh, you ask me to go to the movies with you, and now you're blackmailing me," you sighed. "Fine...I'll get you any sour candy you want. But you can't put it in the popcorn!"

He held out his hand to shake on it and you rolled your eyes as you slapped your hand into his.

He grinned and whooped in excitement, then ran out of the store. Before you could even blink, he was back and, in a move that made your heart beat a little harder in your chest, he leaned down and gave the back of your hand a very light kiss.

What?

"I'll leave you to your sparkly kingdom, your Highness," he announced with an over exaggerated, grandiose voice as he returned to his full height. "See you at 7." He then winked and ran back out.

WHAT?!

"My conversion Eddie!" You called after him once you got back to your senses.

The loud crack of his laughter echoing though the mall was just enough to make you forgive him.

---

“Ok so is this a date?” your ASM asked softly as she counted your register down before you left. "The last time it wasn't a date, but is it a date now? Movies? Sharing popcorn?"

"His friends are gonna be there. It's just...hanging out."

"Oooh, meeting some of his friends. Are you gonna sit next to him? Dark movie theater, perfect for smooching."

"Shut up. No it isn't perfect for smooching.”

"But you’re gonna sit next to him. You're avoiding eye contact, you’re nervous," she sing-songed and you groaned. "This is a date!"

Mindy was a former stay-at-home mom who got bored of being at home now that the kids were all in school. It should have been weird, managing someone almost a decade older than you, and you both voiced your concern during the interview that one would treat the other like some dumb kid. You because you were younger and didn't have as much life experience, and Mindy because she didn't have much retail experience and would be working with a bunch of teenagers. But you both agreed not to let that influence your treatment of one another.

There was mutual respect and trust.

There was also relentless teasing. On Mindy's part, at least.

"Ok, listen, I told you that he's great but he said this thing the first time we hung out."

"What thing? Why is this the first time I'm hearing about this thing?" she put her dollar-clenching hands on her hips and stared at you in a way that only a mother could.

You explained how he mentioned, specifically, that your first night out wasn't a date. How disappointed you were. How embarrassed you were that you would even entertain that idea and were now doing everything in your power not to think of him as cute and stomp all the hopes and dreams of your own mall romance into the dirt.

All of your insecurities about your non-existent love life laid out for her--and everyone else in the busy store--to hear.

And Mindy just snorted in your face.

"I don't think I'm that old, but you kids really need to stop overthinking things," she laughed and slammed the cash drawer shut. "Alright you're all set. Go have fun on your not-date."

"I really hate you," you deadpanned and turned to leave.

You were about halfway through the trek across the mall to the multiplex when you did exactly what Mindy told you to stop doing: overthink.

Eddie was worried you might not like his friends...what if his friends didn't like you?

They were younger, still in high school. (You were blatantly ignoring that you could say the same thing about Eddie.) And you had a younger brother who was still in high school. When you were still at home his friends thought you were stupid and old and gross, as kids do.

You drove your grandpa's old car--handed down when his doctor told him he couldn't drive anymore--you didn't listen to whatever new bands they were obsessing over, you didn't know all the cool young slang.

You'd think, working with a bunch of teenagers, that you would pick something up, but for as long as you had been given keys at your old store, you tried to keep a little bit of distance with the younger associates. It helped get them to see you in an authoritative light, to trust your leadership.

And it absolutely stunted your social ability.

And your brother and his friends could smell it like sharks smelling blood in the water.

It had never bothered you--they were little twerps anyway who you'd threatened to beat up when they got too annoying anyway--until now.

What is it that Eddie's friends would find cool?

You knew about the band, and obviously you both had been bickering over discussing music. He also told you about his Hellfire Club, which conveniently consisted of the same group. And while you couldn't really wrap your head around the mechanics of the game from the description--he had offered to lend you some of his books to help you understand--you did think some of the creatures and characters he described were intriguing.

And hell, you might not know a whole lot about fantasy, but you sure as hell knew about escapism. Maybe they all were looking for a way out of their realities too.

But that was probably too heavy a topic to talk about with a bunch of teen boys at the movies.

"There she is, late," Eddie's voice broke through your thoughts as you approached the mall entrance to the theater. You looked up to find the small group of boys leaning against the wall beside the box office.

You could do this.

Or pretend to, at least.

Besides, it was just Eddie. You could be cool for him.

"You said 7?" you argued. "I clocked out at 6:45!"

"Well we're gonna miss the previews," one of the boys grumbled good-naturedly, before breaking into a small smile. "Hey, I'm Gareth."

"The drum prodigy!" You exclaimed and his smile got a little bashful.

"Shut up," he muttered. "You haven't even heard us play yet!"

You quickly introduced yourself and Eddie clapped his hands on each of his friends' shoulders as he introduced them and gave you a little fact about each of them in a way only Eddie could.

"We have Gareth, obviously, the man of the hour with a real, legitimate drivers license," Eddie sniffled and wiped a fake tear from his eye. "Can't believe he's all grown up. But let the record show that I taught him how to parallel park."

"Dave, who, I have recently learned, can fully recite Edgar Allan Poe's The Raven from memory. Iambic pentameter and all that shit, right? Guess you only look dumb, huh, Davey."

"And Jeff, Jeffrey, Jefferson, my right hand man. Not just the peanut butter to my jelly, but both slices of bread too. Where in the world would I ever be without him? Actually, maybe I would have graduated by now."

They all smiled and greeted you; it was clear that they adored Eddie and enjoyed the attention of their fearless leader, even while swatting at him as he embarrassed them.

All except Jeff, who had given you a tight, cordial smile--a strained flash of braces--and then urged everyone to follow him in.

The three younger boys bickered about snacks while you all waited in line, Gareth and Dave turning to ask you your preferences every now and again.

Whenever they couldn't decide on something--jalapeños on the nachos or no, extra butter or extra salt on the popcorn, wait should we get the hot dog combo--Eddie would swoop in with a sharp "shut up" and play mediator, then turn back to you with the biggest, fondest grin and an eye roll.

It was cute.

He was cute.

It was heartwarming to see him with his friends. You hadn't been hanging out with him for very long at all, but it was nice that he liked you enough to share this, share his friends, with you.

Once you all had your treats, including the sour candy you had promised Eddie, you made your way into the theater, only for the boys to bicker, once again, about who was sitting where. They each had their preferences and argued over the pros and cons of each. Dave like the aisle but so did Jeff, and Gareth--a self-proclaimed movie theater expert--said the center of the theater had the best viewing and sound experience. Eddie just preferred the back.

"Because if the movie is shit, you can just throw popcorn at the people further up who are making out."

"Or just watch them and--hey!"

"Not in front of a lady, dingus!"

You just hung back and enjoyed the show while apologizing to the other moviegoers for blocking their way to picking their own seats.

"Well where do you want to sit?" Eddie abruptly turned to you.

"Uh, well." You didn't think you really had a choice in this; you were just invited last-minute. This was their outing. "I'm just a guest. Whatever you guys pick is fine with me."

"Do you even like going to the movies?" Jeff laughed, but there was a slightly annoyed undertone that you wondered momentarily if you were just imagining. "Or watching scary movies?"

"I mean, yeah, who doesn't like movies," you shrugged, figuring it wasn't really the time or place to be discussing your preferences in movies either. "And horror...well, my dad always said it was cursed or something, but it's fun, they're funny."

The lights started to dim in the theater and you swore you saw Jeff roll his eyes.

"Funny?"

What was his deal?

"Yeah, when something scares you and then you jump and it makes you laugh. Especially when it's lame and cheesy. And...it's like when you ride a rollercoaster, it makes your stomach go...funny."

They all muttered in understanding, but you still felt uncertain.

"That's an interesting way of looking at it, sweetheart. I guess we all just like to get scared shitless," Eddie grinned. He clapped his hand on Gareth's shoulder. "Alright, since we're here to celebrate Gareth the Great's accomplishments, he gets to choose."

---

About a half hour in, you needed to go to the bathroom and you shimmied past the boys, doing everything in your power not to get flustered when Eddie put his hand on your hip to steady you, with a soft "careful" so you wouldn't fall over onto the next row of people.

Not that he would be able to see in the dark theater anyway.

But you felt like...somehow, he would know.

You took a deep, calming breath of relief when you got out to the lobby of the theater and joined the line for the bathroom.

The movie was good, suspenseful.

Eddie didn't lie when he said Dave screamed at jumpscares. He also conveniently forgot to mention that he liked talking during movies. People nearby kept turning their heads to shush him when he got too loud, too excited, gushing over one thing or another to someone in the group.

"Guys did you see that?"

"That was really fucked up."

"Wait what happened? I couldn't hear what they said."

It was also just not helping any of your efforts to bury your attraction for Eddie when you shared an armrest and a bucket of popcorn. Your fingers would brush his when he offered to share his candy with you. Your breath would hitch during scary moments and he would knock his knuckles with yours and give you a shit-eating grin.

“Funny my ass.”

“Shut up, you’re the worst.”

You did everything in your power to ignore the electric tingles along your skin.

“Quiet I can’t hear.”

Then there was Jeff sitting on Eddie’s other side, who would make comments like that every now and again.

It’s not like you had enough time to get a good read on Jeff; Eddie had said he was working on his confidence on-stage, maybe he also needed it off-stage? Maybe he had a hard time meeting new people? Or...or maybe he was just a stand-off-ish kind of guy, broody?

Or maybe...

Or maybe he just didn’t like you.

You really hoped that wasn't the case, but it sure seemed like it.

You knew how it felt when there was one friend in the group that just didn't like you as much as they liked the others, how they went out of their way to make you feel just a little bit unwelcome. How everyone else would just shake it off, because you'd all been hanging out for years, and it was just good natured anyway.

But this wasn't that.

This wasn't your friend group; these were Eddie's friends, and you really hadn't given them a reason to dislike you. You wanted them to like you; you wanted them to...tell Eddie he wasn't wasting his time being your friend.

The other guys seemed nice enough.

Right?

And you really wanted to try, especially with Jeff, who Eddie spoke of fondest.

Of course, he spoke of all the boys fondly…but whatever happened that caused Corroded Coffin to break up—something Eddie seemed incredibly hesitant to talk about—Jeff had been there to build it back up again. And you could tell how proud Eddie was of his friend, how grateful he was to have him.

You didn't want Eddie's closest friend to have a problem with you, his newest.

You went about your business in the bathroom, staring at your reflection for an extra long second, practicing your smile so it wouldn't seem too customer-service-y or artificial--your well-practiced mask that had always gotten you ahead at work--in case that was why Jeff had a problem. Did he think you were fake?

You just wanted to know the truth.

And you didn't have to wait long to find out, because on your way out of the bathroom, you saw Jeff waiting by the entrance of the theater. His arms were folded across his chest and he tapped his foot impatiently.

"Everything...ok?" you asked hesitantly.

"Yeah," he replied, with that same strained smile he gave you earlier. "I just wanted to talk really quick."

"Oh...kay," you agreed. "Listen, if I did anything wrong, or to offend you, I'm sorry. I know I can be too much someti--"

"Why are you hanging out with Eddie?" he interjected, cutting right to the chase. You frowned and cocked your head to the side in question. "Why are you being nice to him?"

"Why shouldn't I?" you asked in return. "He's a nice guy. He asked me to come to the movies with you guys. I’m sorry if it was just supposed to be your time together—”

"Not just now," Jeff looked around nervously, as if he was afraid to make eye contact. "He came to practice the other week excited that you agreed to go out with him and that you were cool and he was nervous and he hasn't shut up about you ever since."

Your heart got stuck in your throat. Obviously he had to tell his friends about you if he invited you to go to the movies, but...he hadn't shut up about you?

"But he's been through a lot and he doesn't deserve whatever...whatever scheme you have planned by hanging out with him. S-so this is your chance to let him down now, before you really hurt him."

You were quickly brought back to reality.

Jeff was staring at you now, expectantly. All traces of nervousness gone.

"Why would I have a scheme? Why would I hurt him?" you questioned.

"Because you're not the first pretty, popular girl to hang around with him, only to make him feel like shit afterwards once they get what they want."

Oh.

Oh no.

"If you're trying to score some cheap weed or something--"

"I'm not."

"--Or like...get some sort of laugh at his expense with those girls you work with--"

"Jeff."

"Just know that it really hurt him last time," he concluded. "Like really broke him down, on top of everything else, and it took everything I had to get him back. He's my best friend; the closest thing I have to an older brother. And he's the best guy I know. I can't stand to see him get that way again because someone else was too selfish to consider his feelings."

Your head was spinning, trying to put all of the pieces together.

And it was only making you incredibly sad for your friend.

"So..." Jeff took a breath and straightened his shoulders, as if he would step in your path to block you from entering the theater if you didn't give him the answer he wanted. "Tell me the truth. What do you want with Eddie?"

What did you want?

What didn't you want?

"I want to be his friend," you began. "I don't have that many people here, Jeff. I left home for the first time ever, and I'm kind of alone and it's scary. I don't really hang out with the people I work with because I have boundaries. And Eddie has been one of the only people I've met outside of work, technically, and he's been one of the most welcoming people so far.

"I want to eat junk food with him, and listen to his corny jokes, and get to see his favorite places in Hawkins, even though he swears up and down that it's a shit hole. And hurting him is the very last thing I want to do. But pain is just a part of life, and as much as we want to, we can't just...stop him from getting hurt at every step of the way.

"It's really admirable that you came out here to try and protect him, Jeff. I'm glad he has a friend like you. And hopefully now, since we'll have an understanding, we can be friends too," you finished with a smile.

Jeff hesitated then relaxed, the need to be Eddie's protector pretty much vanished. He wrung his hands together for a moment before sighing.

"Yeah," he agreed slowly. "I think we can be friends… Even though you're old." He grinned mischievously.

Low blow.

"Ouch! Thanks, I'm not that much older than you guys.”

"I mean, you're old enough to buy alcohol, right?" he asked expectantly.

"I'm not buying beers for you guys," you deadpanned.

"That makes you old."

"...still not buying you beer."

"Well, shit, you're not only old, you're lame too," Jeff laughed. "So...let's go back in? Before Eddie sends a search party."

"Hey, does he tell you guys not to fall into the toilet when you go to the bathroom too?"

---

Once you got back to your seats, Eddie hemmed and hawed about how the two of you missed the "best part," which he theatrically reenacted for you with Gareth and Dave after the show was over and you headed back into the mall.

He also couldn't shut up about it as he walked you back to your car in the employee lot. The other guys left, Gareth proudly showing off his new license by driving the other guys home in his mom's station wagon.

"The blood, the flesh," Eddie gushed, creepily running his fingers over your neck and shoulders, giving you the chills as you swatted at him. "It was so gross!!!"

"I'm sorry I missed it. Guess we're just gonna have to go see it again."

"We should do a group zombie costume for Halloween; it would be so cool. We could go trick or treating; the people around here don't really care how old you are. Scare all of the kids with some blood and guts. What do you think?"

"Sounds fun, I think you guys would look great!" You agreed.

"No, I meant you too," he insisted and then immediately backtracked. "Shit...unless you don't want to. Or you had another costume planned. I mean Halloween is months away but..." He continues rambling and you shake your head and stop him.

"Hey, I just figured it was something you'd want to do with the guys," you explained. "Not...me. Who am I? Not part of the band, not in Hellfire Club."

"Why wouldn't I want you there," he smiled, a little bashfully. Not the full, world-moving smile that changed the topography of his face, but a quiet one, one that made him look deceptively innocent. One that you hoped deep down, a little, was just for you. "With me--with us?!"

You couldn't get your hopes up.

You really couldn't.

“I-I mean, the guys all really liked you,” he continued. “I’m sure they’d want you there too.”

"I really liked them all too," you began. "They were cool...so if the guys are ok with it...and we don't do some stupid costume contest at work--they do things like that you know? Corporate sends out a stupid contest for a pizza party and...

"A-anyway, yeah I'd like to be part of your zombie group costume."

"Really?" he asked, similarly to earlier when he asked you to the movies.

"I mean...I might need to be bribed."

Eddie fell to his knees theatrically as you reached your car and you giggled, earning weird stares as people walked by on their way to their cars.

"Oh Queen of Glitter Kingdom," he began, one hand grabbing yours and the other over his heart. "I, your faithful servant, do promise to provide you with whatever sour candy you desire, as much as you please, from the collective treat buckets of the Hellfire Club if you deign to grace us with your presence during Trick or Treating this All Hallows Eve.

"Too much?" he asked after a short pause.

"Maybe," you tilted your head back and forth in consideration. Maybe too much, but that was part of what made him...him. "But I accept your most tempting offer."

He kissed your hand again before jumping to his feet with an excited yelp.

And once again, that thought returned:

How could anyone purposefully hurt a sweet nerd like Eddie?

"See you Sunday sweetheart?" he asked, wet eyes glistening happily.

"Yeah," you agreed. "See you Sunday."

---

Next Part: Standard Operating Procedures 1.03

Sales Associates (AKA the tag list): @gaysludge @storiesbyrhi @tayhar811 @spookybabey @word-wytch @maidenofartemis @dreamlandcreations @wickedbelle @blue-eyed-lion @aysheashea @blue-mossbird @abibliophobiaa

If you weren't given hours this week (if I forgot to tag you), I'm really sorry, we're just tight on payroll. I'll make sure you get a shift next time. ;)

(GUYS JUST LET ME HAVE THIS BIT!)

Let me know if you'd like to be tagged in future installations of the Store Manager Verse.

[invisible-key]

Sick in Public - part 3

This is an indirect continuation of my Sick in Public series – it can be read without reading part 1 and part 2. While the previous two parts represented a blog post Bernie has written to describe his experience with vomiting on a bus, this part is about a new character, who found inspiration in Bernie's post and tried to recreate it herself. ;)

Kinks: emetophilia, stuffing for emeto purposes

OCs: Emily (pic)

Word count: 1.7k words

Warnings: slight nsft (mentions of arousal), detailed description of vomit

===================

My name is Emily, and I am an emetophile.

I’ve been fascinated with puking for as long as I can remember, but only after leaving for college and getting my own room away from my family, I have found courage to experiment with self-induced vomiting.

I’ve been following the blog of this one digital artist who draws a lot of emeto and asphyxiation stuff. But occasionally he makes a post about himself vomiting irl as well. Recently, he wrote a post about his true experience of throwing up on a crowded bus and it’s given me brain rot. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. The image of chunks of vomit reflecting back onto my skin as I puke on the doors of a bus was living in my brain rent-free 24/7. I was obsessed. I needed to feel it.

I’ve never had the courage to make myself vomit in public, but it’s one of my biggest fantasies. Nobody would suspect a thing. When people see a petit, innocent-looking 19-year-old girl get sick on a bus, they’re not going to assume that she is a gross degenerate who gets off on making a public mess. They are going to think she is very ill and feel sorry for her, maybe even comfort her. Something about the idea of deceiving people like this made my brain tingle.

The important question was: how do I induce nausea inconspicuously? I went to the internet to research ways to induce vomiting (this search itself made me excited to puke right now). I saw a picture of mustard dissolved in water and it kind of looked like orange juice so I figured it might be a sneaky way to make myself sick in public.

On the designated day, I took an empty 0,5 L bottle, added three teaspoons of mustard in it and filled it with water. I put on a light orange dress with a pattern of white flowers (hopefully I’ll be able to wash vomit stains off of it).

I wanted to fill up my stomach as much as possible, so I cooked a vegetable soup and forced myself to eat the whole pot. I was starting to feel a little queasy from fullness, but I didn’t give in until I swallowed the last spoonful. My belly felt heavy and tight. It became visibly round and protruded from under my dress.

After the large meal, I hopped onto a bus headed for the shopping centre. I sat at the back of the bus, away from people, so that they would not realize that the orange juice smelled like mustard. When I settled down, I opened the bottle. I took a sip and grimaced. The taste was revolting, but I tried to supress gagging because I had to remain inconspicuous.

I was only able to down half the bottle, the taste was just too much. My mouth started salivating a little and I gagged into my palm. A bit of acid came up to my mouth, but I swallowed it back down.

The bus ride took ten minutes, during which… nothing happened. I was queasy due to the gross taste, but it didn’t seem that I was going to vomit. My fantasy of feeling droplets of vomit reflect back onto my skin off the doors of a bus was not going to become a reality.

Oh well. If I’m already at the mall, I might as well buy a new summer dress.

I got off the bus and made my way towards the entrance of the mall, feeling water sloshing inside my heavy stomach. The disgusting taste lingered on my tongue, and I felt a bit queasy and lightheaded.

I entered the mall and headed for my favourite clothing store. As I was browsing dresses, I still felt nauseated, but at this point I didn’t think much of it. I became more interested in shopping than in throwing up. I found a delightful light green dress with a pattern of white flowers that I was sure would go great with my red hair, and I made my way to the changing rooms to try it on.

Suddenly, I was overcome by a shiver followed by a cold sweat.

No – no way that I’m going to vomit NOW…

But there was no mistaking the feeling as my throat tightened and my mouth filled with a large amount of saliva.

I basically threw away the dress and ran out of the store. I emerged at the central plaza of the shopping centre. In the middle of it was a small fountain surrounded by benches. I knew where the bathroom was, but I could tell that I was not going to make it there.

I stopped halfway to the fountain. I was shaking and my legs felt weak. My heart was pounding in my chest, and I felt a little dizzy. The time has run out. I leaned forward and put my hands on my knees.

“Egk – guuuurh – cough!”

I gagged and retched, and a small amount of brownish water came out my mouth and fell on the tiles below.

“Cough, cough…………”

I’m not vomiting that much yet, maybe I can still stop it… I tried to supress the nausea by sheer willpower, but my belly convulsed forcefully, putting pressure on my overfilled stomach, which sent a large amount of undigested soup up my oesophagus. A waterfall of puke spilled out of my mouth and splashed noisily on the tiles underneath. The puddle was light brown with visible pieces of vegetables. It didn’t look all that different from the soup I had eaten. This thought created a mental image of me eating puke, which made me shudder and immediately retch again in disgust. A small, rather chunky wave of vomit made its way to my mouth and I let it spill out. A piece of vegetable stayed lodged at the side of my tongue, tickling my throat, which stimulated my stomach to spew uncontrollably. “Uuuuuuuuurrrgh!”  – splash, splash! The intensity of this heave put tears in my eyes. I could barely catch a breath, and I was swaying on my weak legs.

I startled when I felt a hand on my arm. I flinched and looked in that direction, while I was still coughing and gagging as the aftereffect of the last wave. Through vision blurred with tears, I recognized a tall man. “Are you alight, miss?” he said in a kind and soft voice. “Let’s sit you down, okay?” He took my hand and lead me to the bench at the base of the fountain.

As soon as I sat down, saliva started filling my mouth once again. I was breathing rapidly, and my heart was pounding in my ears. I was covered in sweat, my belly muscles hurt, I was trembling with sickness, and I just wanted this to be over. I tried to breathe deeply to soothe the nausea, but it wasn’t working. My stomach contracted and more vomit shot out of my mouth, staining the bottom of my dress and splashing on the tiles underneath.

“Huuuuurk!!”

I felt the stranger’s gentle hand caressing my back as I gagged and coughed up forgotten chunks of food from the depths of my throat.

I tried to breathe deeply, for the nausea was overwhelming. There were tears in my eyes, my whole body was trembling, all I could do was breathe. Breathe in, breathe out…

I looked up at my saviour. „Th-thank you…“ I strained through my tense throat, just before a massive wave overtook me. My stomach contracted painfully, and I lurched forward, a watery projectile shooting out of my mouth. It went on for longer than I thought possible, water after water making its way out of me without a break. When it finally ended, I felt a bit dizzy. I tried to breathe, the outside world felt distant, and the only thing I sensed was the hand on my back. When I managed to catch my breath, I opened my eyes and noticed that the puddle of vomit in from of me was HUGE. I was worried that the people might suspect something… But what could they possibly suspect? Nobody is going to assume that an innocent-looking girl overate on soup and then took an emetic to make herself violently sick in a mall.

The man kept rubbing my back, which felt comforting.

“What happened to you, young miss? Why are you so sick? Should I call an ambulance?”

I shook my head dizzily. “No, i-it’s fine…”

I barely managed to finish the sentence before I coughed up another mouthful of bile. It did not shoot far so basically all of it landed on my dress.

I breathed and breathed, and then my stomach contracted again, straining heavily to get just a little bit of water out.

I breathed in and then I started to feel better. The sweet after-vomit feeling of relief washed over me and made me feel light and ecstatic. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the pleasant feeling while the man kept rubbing my back.

When I opened my eyes, I looked down at the massive pool of vomit on the floor. I thought that this huge amount of water and all of these chunks of food came out of my stomach, and it turned me on. My panties were completely drenched, but I wasn’t sure if it was from arousal or if I had pissed myself due to all the straining. Maybe both.

I decided that I should leave before the cleaning staff shows up and starts yelling at me.

I smiled softly at the man (probably didn’t look that charming with pieces of barfed up leak lodged between my teeth). “Thank you for your help, I feel better now. I will leave now. My dad is at the parking lot, he will take me home,” I lied, because I didn’t want to inconvenience the man any longer. I got up and made my way to the exit on weak legs. When I got on the return bus, I sat next to the window and I closed my eyes. I smiled. I did not end up spewing chunks onto the bus door, but it turned into an exciting experience nonetheless.

===================

Disclaimer: This is a fetish story and as such meant to be fiction and not an inspiration for irl deeds. Do not try this "at home". (Also pls don't try to make that mustard emetic, I'm not sure how safe it actually is and I heard that it might not be safe for people with diabetes or a heart condition etc.)

[tikitania]

Mailbag Time!

I need a distraction from watching the vote tally roll in…and my inbox is overflowing…(Update: it's gonna be a sh*t sh*w in this country for a while.) I have just found the ballet talks in tumblir and in telegram and wanted to ask if you could recommend good telegram / instagram account with ballet reviews? I know Catherine Pollak and Irinaba, though unfortunately I havent been able to translate Pollak's telegram posts. I also wanted to ask if you know if Iraínaba has ever said something about May Nagahisa? I by the way totally agree what you said about her in your previous post, but at least you can find there some videos. Telegram is somewhat of a tough nut to crack. I pay for the upgraded version to access English translation. Once I find an interesting channel, I hit the "find similar channels" and browse for more. Overall, it's easier to come across bootleg Bolshoi videos rather than Mariinsky. I blame the St. Petersburg ushers. Telegram Dance Writer's World (Vita Kholopva) Russian ballet writer, lives in Paris, writes about ballet from across the continent but mostly POB. Zapiski Baletomana Alina Ballet - Bolshoi Videos (also on IG but more videos on TG) Natashik_b - Bolshoi Videos (also on IG but more videos on TG)

-----------

Following up from one of your previous posts - seems like Khoreva is okay for now. She’s scheduled to do Odette-Odile on 11/30, so it seems like they’re just being cautious with her workload. Yes, I hope she's taking it easy. I also wish she would stop posting so much. I feel the more I see her clips on IG, doing pirouettes with her characteristic grim-faced determination, the less I care about her stage performances. I find those vids cringe. There. I said it. ------------

I’m not going to name names, because it might be hurtful. But I’ve started following some vaganova students on the TikTok, and oh my, I wasn’t aware of the extent they go to to stay lean. Many of them post frightening “what I eat in a day” and they repost stuff that would be even triggering to write on this post.

I know it’s normal in that world, but I didn’t know the extent of it. I honestly thought that they were so skinny because of all the exercise + clean eating. I just wasn’t prepared for that level of undereating I saw.

This is really sad, yet unsurprising. The school regularly weighs these girls and kicks them out if they fall outside their norms, so I feel like ED's are baked into their training in implicit ways.

____________

Is it just me or is sofia Valiullina having a splendid season at the bolshoi this year?

I love this! And, yes! She's dancing beautifully. ---------------

I’m confused about vaganova castings. Do teachers assign roles? Or do they hold auditions. Can roles be given and taken away?There was a picture of Natasha furman rehearsing the bunny in fairy doll, but Yasmina Aziz danced it on stage, while Furman did something else. So far there have been three different girls performing the Fairy doll. Do they alternate based on merit? Injury? Vibes? I'm under the impression that students are selected for roles.

--------------- Favouritism: Now that Tsaradiske has a girls class, graduating this year, I’m afraid there is going to be favouritism where he gives all the roles to his class rather than Julia’s graduating class Maybe? I mean…who really knows what's going on behind the scenes. I really wish he didn't have a girls class, though. I was generally unimpressed by the exam last year. I think a lot of people remarked that his style is not suited for the Mariinsky. --------------- Do you think Maria Khoreva would be appreciated more in an European company? Probably. She has a big name and genuinely seems to love dancing abroad. I mean she gushes about her experiences with other companies, so I could definitely see a path for her outside of Russia.

----------------- Diana Vishneva... She's always speaking about her love for Vaganova and about the importance of her teacher Ludmila Kovaleva (and she's also the only one to get a perfect score at vaganova). Do you think that D.Vishneva will eventually move to teaching at Vaganova, becoming a new Kovaleva? Or Maybe take Nikolai Tsiskaridze place and become Rector? No. I don't see that happening. She's got her own creative projects. Tsikaridze is only leaving Vaganova to become the AD of the Bolshoi. I don't think he'd leave for anything less. ---------------- Opinions on Isabella McGuire Mayes? I like her as a person, and i think her tips on technique are quite perfect and right to the point, she's also quite honest on some things regarding the reality of ballet. I like her instagram and youtube videos, and regularly listen to her podcast. However i'm iffy on other things, like when she recounts some of her stories, I've watched most of her videos, past and present, and found many inconsistencies regarding her history, injury's, stretching journey, turnout journey, eating habits, experiences and even opinions on other dancers... etc. sometimes inconsistent, let's say that. I love her. She's a great online presence! I don't think it's fair to litigate someone's memory or impressions, which are far from ironclad. Could you recount memories with 100% accuracy. Do two people recall the event the exact same way. I say this because in my professional life I deal with a lot of testimony and inconsistencies are the norm. In my personal life, I've misremembered a ton — or at least, my memory doesn't always sync with the memories of others. ------------------- I have a question regarding the logic of vaganova's student selection. Obviously they look for medium/tall lean girls, with archy feet, hyperextend knees', natural turnout, etc. And clearly all the girls they pick already have ballet and rytmic gymnastics training. But at the same time i wonder if it's correct to limit their dancers to this, like i would love to see a vaganova trained class filled with random girls and just see what vaganova can produce without selecting the best and most blessed from the start. Logics of ballet selection part 2: Since they look for these natural talents, they must also realise that these genetics are part of some of the dancers downfall. Hyperextened knees are SO prone to injury, not to mention what high arches archy feet do to the tendons etc. Excessive flexibility and hip mobility also means a decrease of muscular strengh. Combining this with overtraining and malnutrition, young dancers are just putting their bodies through hell. Not to talk about what amenorrea does to the body, like osteoporosis, low bone density (increased stress fractures) etc So why? why is it so? is it so necessary? or can greatness be achieved in other ways. Their approach will likely never change. That said, your thought experiment is interesting…but there is an established aesthetic and I don't see this changing much if ever. -------------- Did you see that bolshoi is touring the mariinskii 2 with Romeo and Juliet? We will get to see Sofia Valiullina, Elisabetta Nallin and Yaroslavna Kuprina back in St. Petersburg! Yes! This will be so interesting! -------------- Do you know why Jaden Grimm (the American who graduated vaganova in 2023) is leaving Mariinsky? I had no idea she left. I don't really follow her. We can only speculate as to why, but I'm sure her next steps will be announced eventually.

[colorisbyshe]

hi!! i’m so sorry for liking old discourse posts i just forgot why i was following u and looked through some tags and found some good posts there. also the stuff u reblog these days is really nice so i’m not planning on unfollowing or anything hehe

sorry i isn’t dare to go off anon even tho u probably know who i am based on recent notifs anyways. i’m shy lol

it’s fine!!! i don’t mind when old posts are liked or reblogged, at this point they rarely recirculate in any meaningful way unless someone with like 10k followers brings it back

i stand by 95% of the stuff i said before with most of the 5% i don’t just being how i said it. (i made a lot of concessions to placate people that i wouldn’t do now, lol.)

so truly no worries about going through old content. it’s still representative of this blog i jus t don’t think it’s a pressing issue to talk about in that a. everyone has already made up their minds and b. those who haven’t are going to… actually listen to reason?

i’ll say it here tho for new followers: this person is referencing ace discourse posts because i quite strongly believe cisgender, straight people and cisgender aroace people do not belong in lgbt spaces and that holds especially true when aromantic and asexuality have been watered down to include people who do want to date and do want to have sex, respectively.

I do not believe aphobic opppression is real—I think everything described as aphobia is either rape culture/misogyny, ableism, misdirected homophobia, or is just interpersonal discrimination which is BAD but not oppression—and that even if it were, it would not make cisgender straight people or cisgender aroace people belong in LGBT spaces. Because experiencing oppression does not necessarily mitigate your role in the oppression of others.

I believe strongly in aces forming their own community, though I will say there is little incentive for them to do so considering my previous point. There’s no laws to protest, no funds to raise. So you end up with spaces just based on including everyone and catering to any possible feeling which ends up forming harmful, contradicting rhetoric.

All this said, I won’t be arguing any of these points. I have tags you can browse—ace discourse, hsdd, ace history—and again I stand by most of what is said there. If anything seems incongruous with things I currently say, assume I’ve changed my mind or message me off anon for clarification.

Otherwise… yeah. Welcome new and old to the fact that I, years ago, discussed ace discourse and did more research than any of you, therefore I know more than any of you and don’t need to talk about it at length. I know where I stand, y’all know where you stand.

Follow harder, unfollow… be free with yourselves but not with my inbox.

No need to apologize for interacting with old content either. Unless you’re arguing on it. Then get blocked.

[whilomm]

Hey, so this is kinda off the wall, but I need to find a roommate but I'm so anxious about it, did you use a certain website? Or like do you have any roommate finding tips?

oh yeah i was super nervous about it too bc of previous bad experiences (with college apartments that were auto-matched), i guess my tips would be from someone whos only done this manually Once:

worth a shot, straight up ask if any of your friends need a roomie. sometimes things line up! didnt for me atm (aside from one friend who said "oh maybe in like 2 years but maybe not")

try and keep in mind that if it doesnt work out its not Forever if that helps you not freak out as much. like, maybe yall stay to the end of the lease and split, or if yall have to split before than eh youre just starting the matching process over again. getting that thru my head helped me lmao

as for websites, yeah there are a ton of specific roommate matching sites you can use, personally I just used facebook and posted in a couple of local groups with a lil thing about myself and I got some matches p quick. I live in a largerish city tho (austin tx) so if you live somewhere smaller there might not be AS big of a pool. facebook as a whole sucks of course but the groups here and there are useful!

I posted both in a more general group and a queer housing group, and i said a lil more about myself in the queer group, but you can also use your post to explicitly or gently filter out ppl you dont wanna live with. personally i did purposefully mention being autistic offhandedly just to hopefully filter out ppl wholl be cunts about that (made a lil comment about "im autistic and a super picky eater, so i wont eat your food lol"), you can explicitly say you dont wanna roomie who has pets/smokes/etc, stuff like that.

(oh, also, if you have a long abandoned facebook acct/need to make a new one, that can sometimes look a lil sus so maybe straight up say "i dont use facebook but i can give you one of my other socials if you want to snoop")

look around the website/group for examples from other people on what to include (max rent, apartment layout prefs, area, whether you already have a place picked out or not and if you'd be willing to apartment hunt w someone, timeframe, etc)

and of course actually say a lil about yourself in the listing. I know thats nerve wracking and all but eh, people wanna have a vague idea of you beforehand. List some of your hobbies/interests, normal boring stuff like that.

talk about how clean you are. and how clean you want your roomie to be. neat freaks and gross ppl may be Incompatible. "i can keep the common area clean but my rooms gonna be a mess" was my thing, and roomie is sameish, which works out!

make a listing, in multiple places if possible, and both see who contacts you and browse other peoples listings. this is defo a time to get over that fear of being the first to say hi! if someone lists a super sweet set up at a good price tho and gets 20 likes dont be surprised if they dont respond lmao, might have a waitlist going

(OH YEAH and if u havent used facebook in 10 years be aware on mobile theres a separate messaging app and you might miss ppl messaging bc of the stupid "pending" tab or whatever. a lotta ppl in the group specifically also commented "messaged!" on posts ig to just say "HEY CHECK THE OTHER STUPID APP IF IT DIDNT GIVE YOU A NOTIF", i found it REALLY easy to miss messages for a bit)

SCAMS EXIST! be cautious, dont just send ppl a "$500 deposit" off the bat, make sure you meet people IN PERSON and preferably talk to whoever you're gonna be renting from (like the leasing office if its an apt complex, or just the landlord) first before signing whatever someone on facebook sends u

as usual meet ppl in person in public places like coffee shops and tell ppl where you're going espec if you're going to look at the rental etc etc, same safety rules for meeting anyone from the internet

if you got any responsible adults in your life (like parents/family/friends who have more experience renting) just talk shit thru w them. maybe they can literally help u look at any contracts if you're not used to reading them, or maybe just chat w them about how shits going so they can just be like "oh yeah that all sounds normal they sound cool" or "YEAH THATS A RED FLAG".

oh yeah, make sure you READ YOUR LEASE. i know we all just Agree To The Terms And Conditions all the time but yeah contracts should be read. even if you dont read every word at least skim it, make sure u read the big things like the money numbers (and stuff like uh. how much notice the apt requires on move out. recently fucked over by that! 🙃). check for extra fees and numbers that are different than discussed. dont just sign whatevers put in front of you!!

think about how much Stuff you have. are you moving out for the first time and have Jack Shit? well, you probs wont have conflicts like "whos couch do we keep?" which is nice. do you currently live on your own and have p much all your own furniture? might be a lil issue if your roomie is also established! just st you gotta work out with your roommate, and if nothing else you could always get a cheap storage locker to set aside shit you dont wanna get rid of til you know its gonna work out long term. if its st important, maybe say it in your listing. personally i noted in my listing "i got a big ass couch i dont wanna get rid of" and my roommate specifically contacted me like "oh yeah the couch is chill" so all twas fine 👍

and like. try to talk shit out w your roomie when issues arise instead of letting shit boil over. gotta get good at this myself!

sorry for being long and disorganized but those are just a few of the things that popped into my head lol, +anyone else w more roomie searching experience has any advice on the matter feel free to chime in! im not really an expert or nothin but also feel free to ask more questions, i can at least try to answer!

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Had a conversation with someone today about browsers, and it made me decide to write a post about a thing many people have written posts about before, and I saw those posts for a long time and largely ignored them, but then one day I decided to follow their advice, and it was so much quicker and easier than I’d expected. It turns out everyone’s right: it really is a good idea! Really! So here is my post to be that person telling everyone to: switch to Firefox!

Most of the posts I’d seen about it before focused on the way it’s the only browser that doesn’t mine and sell your data, which is of course important. Dating mining by giant corporations is evil for many reasons, I understand that as a broader issue. But to be really honest, on an individual level, I don’t care all that much whether Google knows what I’m doing on the internet. For quite some time, I never cared enough to bother switching browsers.

But then I did, and learned there are a lot of advantages besides the data privacy. Mainly, Firefox is so much faster. All else equal, on the same machine with the same capabilities, Firefox will open things quicker and more cleanly and easily than Chrome. “Cleanly” is the best word I can think of for the interface – it doesn’t bombard you with ads and widgets the way Chrome does. It’s not constantly pushing stuff at you.

In terms of extensions and stuff, it can do everything Chrome can do and some things Chrome can’t. It can import your bookmarks, browsing history, and saved passwords so quickly and easily. I’d seen before that it could do that, but had assumed it would be a whole process, hadn’t realized it would take literally thirty seconds.

So that is my PSA to say don’t stick with inferior browsers for too long like I did, just due to being used to it. You can import all your stuff into Firefox and it’ll be just like what you’re used to but better. While I’m at it, here are some other applications on my laptop that I recommend:

For the video and audio player: MPC-BE. It’s open source (open source means “free, but in a really good way of community and collaboration”, so you get the free stuff and don’t even have to feel bad for benefiting from the labour of the people who created it without compensating them, though it’s nice to donate if you can), and it’s so, so much better than the default Windows video player. You can customize everything in it to work with your keyboard. I have it set up so I can play/pause, go in or out of fullscreen, go to the previous or next file, and go forward or back by 5, 10, or 30 seconds with one key each. You can set it up to not have the bar at the bottom appear on the screen when you pause it, which makes taking screenshots so much easier.

It can open almost any video or audio file type, including plenty that the default player won’t play. It’s good to have VLC downloaded as a backup, because I’ve come across a couple of file types that MPC won’t play, and I had to use VLC to play those ones, VLC will play anything at all.

Also, you can have more than one video/audio file open at a time. The default Windows player doesn’t even let you do that, which is absolutely ridiculous. Download MPC-BE and change your default video and audio players to that, it’ll make your life better.

Audio editing: Audacity, obviously. Well, it should be obvious, though I actually didn’t start using that until somewhat recently. I found it a bit difficult to work out the controls in it, so instead of taking ten minutes to learn it, I was cutting up audio in my video player. Last year I finally took the time to learn to work Audacity, and it was so worth it. It’s not complicated, it only took about ten minutes to figure out. And now that I’m comfortable with it, it’s so much easier than anything else.

Video editing: NCH VideoPad. This the only software on my computer that I’ve paid for (besides Microsoft Office, I guess), and usually I try to find open source versions of stuff I want. But I’ve tried a bunch of different video editors, and just haven’t found any free ones that work nearly as well as VideoPad. I found myself editing a video in one program, exporting it, then importing it into a different program that has features the first program didn’t have, so I could use those too. VideoPad eliminated the need for that, it’s one program that does everything I want it to.

VideoPad isn’t expensive, and what I really like is it’s a one-time fee. Fuck the software subscription system, if I’m going to pay for something like that, I want to actually own it and get to keep it forever. I think VideoPad does have a subscription system, but it also has an option to pay a one-time fee to buy it outright, and that’s what I did. I paid for it once quite a few years ago now, and that was a very good purchase, I’ve gotten great use out of it.

For downloading: Jdownloader is an excellent way to get video and audio files off the internet. Doesn’t work every single time, but it works for a lot. I have used it so much in the last few years. The “allow right click” browser extension can be pretty useful too.

For screen recording: ShareX. Lightweight, fast and simple program that does everything I need it to, for free. Sometimes, if Jdownloader fails me so I try a whole bunch of other options and still can’t work out how to download a file, I find it can be easier to just play the whole thing while recording my screen.

For conversions: Media Mobile Converter. There are plenty of internet programs that do this, but I found it was really worth downloading a program that will let me do this right from my computer, so I can convert multiple files at a time. I use it most often to convert video files to mp3, like if I download a song off YouTube and just want the audio. But it’s also nice for taking video or audio files that are in weird formats, and converting them all to mp3 or mp4. Occasionally I’ll get an mp3 that’s too old for Audacity to read, so I use this convert it to wav and then it works no problem. It’s a useful tool to have on hand, and again, open source.

This has been a PSA about the pieces of software that make my life better.

[forabeatofadrum]

And it is another Friday!

This week is very much about catching up on fics that I am reading. As I said, since I read the entirety of the Heroes of Olympus two weekends ago, I lost track of the fics.

“But Yuè, didn’t you also read Trials of Apollo this week?” Yes, yes, I did, but I spread that one more evenly, so I had time to catch up on fics.

Okay, okay, I did read some new stuff, because I am me, and I am a wreck after a *cough* certain moment in the Trials of Apollo. And what do I do? I look up fancontent. I was scrolling through Finn @agentsnickers​’s blog and I found out they wrote for even when i’m far away, i’ll hold you in my heart, which is about Nico finding out about [REDACTED]. I am so sad, but it was a good fucking fic. I also read picking up the pieces, also by Finn, because it caught my eye. I loved this one too.

But now to the catch up! I finished When It’s Right, It’s Right by @cerriddwenluna, and actually a bit earlier than others. Gwen posted the full fic on S&C before AO3! I loved how Gwen managed to sneak so many “swipe left” jokes into this fic.

Another Valentine’s fic I needed to catch up on is @rockitmans‘s Blaine Anderson vs. Valentine’s Day. As I said in a comment, I love Blaine being a nervous wreck! This was very sweet.

We are going back in time to another holiday: Christmas. I still have festive fics to read. Last week I started Scenes from December by @spaceorphan18 and I finished it this week. I was crying by the end of it. This was a good fucking fic.

And just in time for this post, @nausikaaa/@wellbelesbian​ updated blow on the tinder, a fic where Natasha gets Turned instead of killed. I did not expect the romantic Malcolm. I really enjoy this fic.

As usual, here are the tags on my personal blog, for if you want to browse:

Klaine fics (klfics)

Brittana fics (bsfics)

general Glee fics (glee fic)

Whoniverse fics (dw fic)

Check, Please! fics (omgcp fics)

Simon Snow series fics (co fics)

general fic tag (fics)

original writing tag (writing)

Oh, and how was Trials of Apollo? I liked it. I really liked the character arc that Lester/Apollo went on. I liked all of the characters, to be honest. I also liked that they split the huge group of characters over the 5 books. Oh, and I liked Will/Nico, and all the other casual queer rep. I do wonder how long this entire universe can go on. Every series starts with “surprise, there is a bigger threat on top of the previous supposedly biggest threat!” and the last book seemed to hint to another series. I have some more thoughts but then we’re getting into spoiler territory. After all I have a lot to say about [REDACTED] from [REDACTED] and the aftermath that followed [REDACTED].

[marcianoliterati]

books reviews - june 2023,part I

I read a lot this month so on page 13 I decided to post in parts.

this includes:

A lesson in murder , by Verity Bright

A mistletoe moment , by Natasha West

A lesson in murder by Verity Bright

4 stars

(solid, entertaining, would read more)

is book 7 in the Lady Eleanor Swift mysteries. I haven’t read any of the previous ones but this one was free and sounded fun. These books generally don’t care if you read them in order anyway. I got this on stuff your kindle day, i was browsing around and it seemed interesting enough. 

Lady Eleanor is invited to her old school for a speech, and ends up staying to solve a murder, and to help as a boarding house mistress.it’s set in England in 1921. 

Lady Eleanour has recently inherited her family’s state after the death of her uncle, who was the one to ship her off to boarding school at the age of 9 after the death of her parents, and the school often felt like a stifling prison to her, but she survived and is not much a proper lady, despite the school’s best efforts. 

It is mentioned she has done some remarkable things on top of murder solving, like cycling by herself around the world. 

I’m not entirely sure what she means by “around the world” as europeans and other first-worlders tend to have rather skewed ways about things like that, but that is certainly an achievement, a woman cycling by herself in the 1920’s was quite a scandal.

It is labelled a ‘cozy mystery’ which seems to be a popular tag nowadays, though what exactly that means is vague. It encompasses a lot. It generally features little violence, with amateur detectives. 

Yes, like agatha christie, she is considered somewhat of a pioneer i understand.

Maybe it’s just the ones I’m drawn to, but a lot of them seem to include their characters living in small towns and getting around on bikes.

They can be a bit of a mixed bag, sometimes too wholesome, too interested in describing  the everyday world and it takes forever to even get to the murder part. Generally if nothing has happened at 25% i DNF unless i actually find the characters compelling, which is rarely the case.

Others are better and know to present the murder first, and then we see  a bit of the world until it is discovered.

This one presents the murder pretty much immediately, which i appreciated.

And it makes the victim known to the detective, something quite unusual, but it helps, giving her good justification to stay, to help, to decided to stay and help at the boarding house. Adding the personal angle helps here, which isn’t always the case.

It did remind me a bit of one of my favourite christies, a cat among the pigeons, which is technically a poirot story, but he doesn’t show up until about 75% , which is quite the risk but agatha christie knew what she was doing. 

It also takes place in a boarding school for posh english young ladies, and it has the girls trying to work it all out, it’s really well done.

I really enjoyed it, and if i find more books free or in Kindle Unlimited i’d certainly give them a chance.

I enjoyed the boarding school setting, thought it wasn’t too expanded on, but it was fun. Clashing of views,gossip,drama.

The main characters are Lady Eleanor, her butler who apparently accompanies everywhere, and  a cop they appear to have befriended. 

What I found most interesting, is that the MC, Lady Eleanor, is very much a walking portrait of ADHD. 

She has a lot of energy, is very curious, bad at staying still, chicken scrawl handwriting, disorganised, often engages in dangerous behaviour, had behavioural issues in school and so on.

And a decent number of the plucky girl detective genre have similar traits, such as being nosy, active, and incapable of staying put, though not as strong as here, it does make me wonder where does it come from?

Is there a particular example authors are copying? And from there more people copying these copies until it became an archetype?

Cause i do feel like i see this archetype often, though i dont know if there is particular example

Some of it makes sense, like the characters having money, so they dont have to work so they can spend their time investigating, and them being nosy and curious is necessary so they’ll want to find out more. And wandering around which serves to lead them to places and ovearhear things.

Kind of a chicken and egg situation.

It was a fairly entertaining and easy to read book, it flows well, it is decently paced, and does a decent job in the world building, especially about Lady Eleanor’s personal history, and her history with the school.

She is there to investigate a murder, but she also gets a chance to look into her own past, her family history, and her experiences at school, where she was very nervous to return.

The culprit is surprising, though i worry a bit about like,class issues i guess. And it has a heartwarming development as sort of epilogue. 

For fans of cozy mystery,boarding school stories, and apparently how adhd can solve mysteries, when we’re not too busy looking for the glasses sitting in our heads that is.

A mistletoe Moment by Natasha West

2 stars

(bit of a letdown, passable entertainment, a bit like fast food. Would not read again)

I’ve read several of her books, and I’m a big fan, they’re always entertaining, and idk, credible. A lot of romance feels performative, like this is a and this is b and now theyre in love, and i dont care cause it all seems so fake.

Which is why i like her stories, cause generally i do buy it, I can believe it, get involved,get invested.

This one however, felt a bit flat. It is a novella though, more of a one-shot, and it is fun, but it all feels a bit too quick, a bit underdeveloped. Entertaining, but also kind of shallow.

It takes place around christmas, starting at a party, where our main characters hit it off, but theyre separated and spend the rest of the novel, trying to find each other.

One of them was working the party while the other goes there for a work party. Neither is too happy, but it’s not a ‘you inspired me to change my life’ type of deal it is too quick for it. 

And it all feels a bit too contrived, the girl who just lost her phone and apparently doesnt have a cloud back up so the phone has nothing in it? Like i get oh i dont want a phone contract i dont wanna be tied down, but you can have a google backup on pay as you go as well?

Like, surely there were better solutions than running around the city? 

It all feels rather silly, and it kills my suspension of disbelief.

And this in story, i didn’t particularly like either of the MCs so i also have problems caring about what happens to them, i really only finished it cause it was very short.

[arbitrarygreay]

Continuing to try to put into words why Sanctuary's episodes are markedly different from WH13 and Eureka's, despite the surface level genre show elements they all share. And I think that it comes down to the fact that Sanctuary doesn't have much of an episodic structural formula, as most of their episodes are high-concept and relatively more unified. Eureka (especially as it goes on) develops a strong episodic structural formula (science project goes wrong, the cast investigates, gets caught up in the effects, a red herring cause/solution, project goes catastrophic, Jack has to physically implement a solution while accounting for additional obstacles caused by the project intensifying). Even when it does have your usual high-concept premises (bodyswaps, characters get stuck to an emotion, etc.), they exist within the framework of this formula. Warehouse 13 does not adhere to a structural formula much. Every episode is an artifact hunt, but the shape of those investigations varies quite a bit from episode to episode. In addition, the artifact's effects don't always dominate the plotting, especially as the show often has multiple storylines going on. Per my previous post, this doesn't matter in the watching of the show because the cast chemistry carries the day, but it does mean that the show doesn't carry a legacy for its episodes as much (as opposed to individual sequences/scenes). And then, for both WH13 and Eureka, the episode plotting is mostly just a stage upon which the relationship stuff is played. Sanctuary, meanwhile, clearly doesn't have much in the way of planned long term thematic character arcs. At most, there's the slow increase in Will's leadership responsibilities. But there's no sense of "here is how the character should grow", especially not for Magnus, who self-actualized a long time before the show begins. Instead, each episode is a focused unified premise and tonal exercise, to which the characters are servicing. Character development is more of "here's another facet to the character the audience didn't know about before", rather than the traditional case of "and now the character changes because of the events of the episode", as is the case with Eureka and WH13. So, the episode plots aren't about facilitating a change in the characters, and it's more about looking at how they react to these specific situations. In Sanctuary, they pick a movie (a specific tone/atmosphere/setup) that they want to emulate, and then drop the main cast into that. "What does the character look like through e.g. a survival horror lens? How does the character act if they were in a film noir story?" One might also compare this to fanfiction that deliberately does not seek to emulate the source material. "Sanctuary is like browsing FIMFiction" the galaxy brain take lmao. Sanctuary also likes doing extreme focus on 1-2 characters going through an intense gauntlet (and if the other characters show up in the episode at all, only on the fringes). Isolated character showcases. Quite striking. They strip away any elements that would distract from the premise they are focused on. (Obviously Eureka and WH13 have examples of this kind of thing, but the point is that it's very noticeable when they do it, as it breaks from their usual formula/tone.) Something that really sticks in my mind is how Sanctuary aired a found-footage episode (S01E11 Instinct) in 2008, while Dr. Who wouldn't get around to theirs (S09E09 Sleep No More) until 2015.

[zydrateacademy]

Current Activities in Baldur's Gate #1

Man it's been a while since I've had some stuff to say. I never left Tumblr, by the way. Just browsed and lurked my dashboard. Per my work schedule these days I spend my time at home actually playing my games rather than blogging about them. My previous spurt of all those "current activities" archives was mostly back when I was sharing a computer and playing games on Xbox. So my brother and I, depending on some variables, would be essentially trading depending on what we were doing.

But going from a 4-hour shift part time K-mart cashier to a just almost full time produce clerk leaves me less time to just post about my gaming ventures all willy-nilly.

Anyway, Baldur's Gate 3. It's good, it's great. I've spent the post-Early Access hours mostly in character creation and getting various ladies off the beginning nautiloid. There's so many classes and race combinations I want to try so another 30 hours post-EA and I still haven't seen the second act yet. This is typical for a Larian Studios game, same thing happened to me on DoS2.

Just this morning I discovered the hag's bog area which I never actually found in EA but it was probably there. There's just so many goddamn things to do.

I plan on posting some screenshots but this is a bit of a rush-post before a workshift. I need to look up what Tumblr's guidelines are on titties these days because one of my two main characters is rather skimpy. My asshole warlock tiefling who basically has ideations of nudism, but she is still a warlock so she has a skirt and belts to carry her stuff. And a hood because it's spooky and she likes spooking people. But in camp it's all nude and she doesn't give a shit. Weighs her down.

I do at least have a headshot of her that's SFW.

She's cool. Wish the runic tattoos were all over her body.

Because I've spent so much time in character creation, my next post will be more in-depth with my various characters and my general plans with them. This includes both Dibbe and Kiur Kenneth, two of my long-time characters I typically play on a variety of games. If there's a lizard available, I'm absolutely going to be playing Dibbe again.

Odd that I never thought to do so on DoS2.

Not everyone has a screenshot available because some of them are still on the crashing tutorial ship. I get this "mood" to play certain types and right now I'm all rogue and all warlock, but I really want to play a monk because I keep finding monk-adjacent gear... which is exactly the kind of thing that I did on DoS2. I kept finding off-class gear so I'd go roll a new character with that build in mind.

Anyway the absolute scale of the game is immense. Some people have been turned off by the DnD-nature of it, the fact you can only attack once and do one utility thing and that character's turn is over. Honestly it really is not different from the action points of Fallout/DoS2, and it bears decent similarity to Xcom. Same thing on Xcom, you only had two actions or so on that as well (with some buffs with gear, tech, levelups, etc). I'd hazard to say if you liked the old Fallouts, Wasteland, Xcom... this game is still adjacent.

I'll have more to say later. Perhaps after work.

[shinelikethunder]

seriously though, it's incredible how much of my "maybe titties again?" goodwill tumblr torched in 30 seconds through obnoxious UX alone:

i am browsing around in the android app. i see a post about disabling some new content filter. this is the first I've heard of it, even though my version of the app does turn out to have it - they put it in place before adding any mechanism to let me know it's there. strike one.

i go to settings > dashboard, the place where all the settings about what you do and don't see are supposed to live. no sign of it.

i go back to the settings menu. squint at it. see an unremarkable entry near the bottom called "Content you see" that isn't highlighted or marked as new in any way (even though i can't even visit anyone's blog anymore without having to actively tap past an FYI tooltip that can't be turned off, every single time, shilling weeks-old gift features that I've already used)

...oh, that's where my custom tag and keyword filters went. no prior indication they'd even been moved!

i have a lot of filters set up. like. a LOT. i now have to scroll past every single one of them, tag AND keyword, uncollapsed and unabridged, just to see whether there's another setting hiding underneath. on mobile! even the desktop site is more polite than this, jesus

just to recap so far: the only reason i even know to look is that i saw a random post about new content settings, and i would never have bothered with all that scrolling if i weren't crusty and paranoid about sites that hide vital settings in the depths of Menu Hell. i mean, that'd be crazy, right? surely listing all those filters with no collapse is a signal there's nothing worthwhile underneath them.

oh no wait, there they are!

it's not just one toggle, it's FOUR new settings!

all of them are set to "hide everything and never even let me know it was there"

even though there is a "blur" option that would've let me know that stuff was being hidden from me without actually showing it

even though i have, in the past, gone into every iteration of the adult content settings that tumblr has ever rolled out and affirmatively ordered it to show me the titties

THEY ARE NOT TOGGLES. EACH ONE OPENS A SEPARATE MENU SCREEN. every single one of the FOUR new settings needs like 3+ taps in the android app just to put it back to normal.

does turning on the catchall "mature content" setting cause the three more specific ones to default to "show" and let me pick restrictions as needed like a goddamn adult? NOPE, i have to go into the stupid little menu for every single one

it's almost like you didn't want me to find them and, having found them, wanted to make me pay as high an annoyance tax as possible to opt out of being nannied

the dashboard banner that eventually shows up, btw, says nothing about having been voluntold for additional filtering, and also just dumps you out in the general settings menu and leaves you to fend for yourself, with no indication of where this shit is hidden or what "this shit" even is. and that's downright friendly next to the link in the announcement post that's apparently been kicking people out of the app and onto web.

this is not how you get a rightfully mistrustful userbase to be optimistic about putting scarlet letters on their own posts. this is not how you convince anyone that it's just a courtesy, not a scarlet letter, or that it won't be used to punish and stigmatize you the instant the wind shifts direction.

in the most practical here-and-now terms, this is also not how you get people to USE the new content warnings on their posts! artists, especially, are hardly gonna jump to flag anything as mature if it means every single one of their followers - regardless of age, previous adult content settings, or whether they're in Apple's walled garden or not - has just been silently opted out of ever knowing it was there. (this goes double if it requires more than one sentence to explain how to reverse it. which this new setting seems almost deliberately designed to do.)

look, i want the titties back, okay? i would be delighted if this turned out to be the first step towards bringing them back. i know Tumblr is under duress from Apple that affects how they can do whatever they're doing here. but the way it's being rolled out sucks needless ass, and if they wanted my hope and trust, well, those are easier to muster up when I'm not going in grouchy about the frustrating UX of an app that's just taken hostile action against my prior explicitly-affirmed preferences.

[valriety]

SDV: Bacherlorette Baking HCs <3

Post Type: SFW, Fluff, Platonic/Romantic x Reader, Mentions of Family in Haley, Maru, and Emily.

Characters: Haley, Penny, Maru, Leah, Emily, and Abigail.

GN Reader (You/Yours) - slight baker!reader.

Here's the second installment of my baking headcannons for the romance-ables! This time with the lovely bacherlorettes. Assumes a baker!reader, but you can also just read these as general headcanons. Enjoy!

'SDV: Bachelor Baking HCs <3' can be found here.

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Haley:

Arguably the best at baking out of all the bachelors and bachelorettes. Not only is she a canon baker, mentioning it a few times most notably in her fourteen heart event and post marriage dialogue, but her background fits quite well into it too!

I imagine she’s been baking since she was little, but really grew into it after her parent’s left to travel the world. Owns an apron and an huge inventory of baking utensils, dry ingredients, and cookbooks.

Not only did she teach Emily how to bake, but she will also write down an alternative recipe for everything she bakes - specifically to give to Emily.

These alternatives will include detailed steps for the recipe itself, but also for any substitutions (raw diet, gluten free, sweeteners, etc) that can be made. She decorates them with stickers and keeps them in a little folder for her sister. 

Also gifts a lot of her baking to other villagers! Usually the default baker for anyone wanting a home-made birthday cake. She’s quite proud of this :)

Gets so excited if you ask to bake with her, may even invite you first! She’s very confident of her skills, and shows it in her work - she’s meticulous, down to the very last detail, balancing the flavours and placing the decorations perfectly.

She spends a lot of time on prep work with you too! When you go grocery shopping together, prepare to spend a lot of time browsing ingredients - she’ll inspect the fresh groceries closely, and only be satisfied with certain brands for everything else required.

If she has a crush on you, she’ll start making requests for the fresh produce she needs on the community bulletin board, especially the things she knows you’re growing that season, and when you come to deliver it, she’ll invite you inside to come help <3.

Absolutely elated if you gift her any of your baked goodies. 

If you get together, consider yourself set for life on the baking front. Somehow, she always manages to have something freshly made. Will work hard to memorise your favourites off by heart, and will work towards preserving her recipes for anyone dear to her heart.

Canonically her favourite cake is pink cake, but I reckon she also just likes most fruity cakes.

Overall Baking Skill: 5/5. The self proclaimed (but deserved), "Queen of The Bake Sale".

Penny:

Pelican Town’s best kept secret by far is the semi-unfortunate reality of this girl’s cooking and baking. She know’s she’s not good with it, but she just loves both so much, and you can see how eager she is about it, so everyone’s super encouraging. It’s very sweet, actually.

Sam is one of only people in town who actually doesn’t understand why everyone makes such a big deal out of it anyways. Truthfully, her baking isn’t that bad, I mean, she makes mistakes often, and things usually end up a bit burnt - but you can always eat around stuff. Elliot’s baking is the real enemy here.

She borrows a lot of cookbooks from the museum and will study them relentlessly. One time she accidently returned one with all her sticky notes still attached, but she’s one of the only villagers who borrows them anyways - so Gunther ended up suggesting she just leave them in from now on. Maru likes reading her notes in the books from time to time.

Likes a big range of baked goods and flavours, but especially likes eating whatever Leah and Harvey makes. Doesn't ask for anything from them often though.

If you like baking, she might ask you for help to make sure nothing goes wrong. You’ll figure out quickly that’s she’s actually got a lot of good ideas, and has most of the theory down pat - she’s just a bit unconfident about her skills, and has trouble executing her ideas into reality. Give her a push and some gentle encouragement, and you may end up making something really good together :)

If she has a crush on you, she’ll start recommending you her favourite cookbooks and asking about stuff you like so she can direct you to her favourite same or similar recipes for it. She’ll also ask you for help more often.

If possible, she hopes that she’ll be able to make something together with you that she can offer to Jas and Vincent (and later, Leo) as treat for studying so hard <3

If you do get into a relationship, she’ll keep at it, and may actually see herself improve slightly. She might deflect and start out by saying that she owes it to your help, but truthfully it’s entirely her own hard work, effort, and perserverance.

Overall Baking Skill: 2/5 Determination pays off!

Maru:

Love, love, LOVES anything tangy, zesty, or citrusy. Doesn’t bake though, and doesn’t know how to either, but not because she doesn’t want to - just because she never really has had the chance to. She’s got a lot going on, with working at the clinic, helping her father out, and with any personal robotics projects she has.

Demetrius is also a bit wary of anything that could supposedly “get in the way of her bright future”, so if there ever was a time she was interested in learning how to bake, it likely would not have received any of the interest she might have liked to receive :,(

If she ever has a craving, she’ll go to Haley instead of her friend Penny. Because whilst Penny has been known to cook and bake, she’s honestly just a bit bad at it. Maru would never tell her that though.

Would love to join you in your baking endeavours! As it turns out, like her brother Sebastian, she actually has a little bit of an affinity for it given the right direction.

If she has a crush on you, you’ll probably see an influx of letters in the mail from her describing the newest baked goods she’s tried or heard about, or she'll straight up just send you recipes.

She’d also probably memorise your favourites, and find herself subconsciously looking for them whenever she goes shopping for herself <3

If you get into a relationship together, and especially when you move in together, I could see her indulging in baking as a pastime more.

She tries not to make a big deal out of it, but she’s actually very concerned with your strenous lifestyle, and will often pack you small lunches with a slice of whatever she’s baked recently to ensure you’re keeping fed and hydrated during your long days on the farm.

Canonically loves rhubarb pie and strawberry. Would probably fall in love with you again if you ever combined them lol. 

Overall Baking Skill: 3/5! Baked good enthusiast.

Leah:

Honestly not really a big fan of baking, or even eating it for that matter, and she especially dislikes the super sweet stuff. If she does bake, she tends to prefer stuff with a floral essence, like poppyseed, lavender, or even rose!

Buys her ingredients as locally as possible, and has a few plots to herself in the community garden. If she can, she’ll forage.

Learnt extremely quickly not to bake with Elliot (RIP Leah)

If she has a crush on you, and on the rare occasion that she does bake, you’ll have first dibs.

She’s pretty similar to Haley in that she’ll want your farm's fresh produce to work with as well, though she’ll skip the bulletin board and go straight to you instead :)

If you get together, baking together might still be a bit of a non-event, but she’ll go above and beyond in making sure that you have everything you could need, providing you with some of her community garden harvests and forage <3

Overall Baking Skill: 2.5/5. Environmentally conscious!

Emily:

Sweet tooth - but has a few dietary needs and preferences! Living in a small town, the things she often craves often don’t come with alternative or substituted ingredients, so most of the time she’ll have to make them herself, or ask her sister.

Since Haley’s a picky eater, Emily took up most of the cooking in the house. Unfortunately, it’s a real struggle sometimes finding meals that both of them will eat, and she’ll often have to resort to cooking two of the same thing, making them both personalised to eachother’s pallate.

Haley knows this, and while she really doesn’t like cooking meals that much, she does genuinelly want to bridge the gap in her own special way; it’s why Haley taught her how to bake!

Emily certainly isn’t as good as her sister at baking, but she’s still incredibly talented - learning the basics incredibly quickly and having a real sense for how different ingredients interact with eachother.

Honestly, she could make her own recipes from scratch if she wanted, but she much prefers the ones Haley makes specifically for her. She always shows Haley whenever she uses one of her recipes too :,)

She’ll probably share the things she bakes with you before she even realises it’s something you enjoy - and when she does realise, she’ll be super excited at the possibility of having another baking buddy.

If she has a crush on you, she’ll go out of her way to ask you about your favourites, and will try her hand at making a version of it that you can both eat together.

If it’s not something she or Haley have made before, she’ll keep you updated on the process as they work it out. Will insist on feeding you, and will wink cheekily at you when she uses the same fork for herself <3

If you get into a relationship together, she’ll share all of her ingredients, recipes, and even cooking utensils with you. Will also look for cute shape pans or cookies cutters to gift you. 

Overall Baking Skill: 4.5/5. They are sisters, after all.

Abigail:

Never thinks about it honestly - she likes baked goods, but she just doesn’t see herself getting much out of making them. Has all the ingredients available to her if she ever changes her mind though.

Prefers things with dark chocolate or seasonal berries, and especially likes eating them with accompaniments like hot cocoa, whipped or ice cream.

Haley’s not really her crowd, but she always gets a custom birthday cake from her every year since she started offering.

She keeps an eye on Pierre’s inventory, so if something that Sam or Sebastian likes comes in or restocks, she can be the first to grab a few of them.

She keeps keeps them on her person when they go to hang out, so she can immediately give them one if they mention they’re getting a bit hungry. Doesn't make any sort of deal about it either, just holds it out to them. Neither Sam nor Sebastian knows why she does this, but they’re not complaining either. 

If you like baking, you’ll have to invite her if you want her to join you. She’s not good or bad at helping out, and will prefer if you take the lead for the majority of it. She will bring over the little extras or whatever you’re missing though! And as you serve up, she’ll offer to make you a drink or something simple to go with it :)

If she has a crush on you, she’ll start including you in her little Sam+Seb snack grabs, and if you ever mention needing something but not being able to find it in town, she’ll secretly get Pierre to special order it, by saying she’s heard alot about it in town recently, and they could turn a pretty big profit by being the sole provider! Is she lying? Yes. But, it’s for the farmer, so who cares <3

If you end up getting into a relationship together, she’ll make sure you’re always stocked up, mostly on general ingredients, but especially any decor. Likes buying you sprinkles or marshmallows and making you custom mixes.

She’s still pretty serious about the Egg Festival by this point, so maybe consider making her a few themed items using her mixes? She’ll love that.

Overall Baking Skills: 2.5/5. 'Decor Skills 100'.

A/N: That's it for these headcannons! Hope you liked them :)

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