#like more than i did last time people were proper dicks about what happened

[quality-on-a-patch-of-awesome]

Opened Tumblr this morning to discover that I'm going to hate the newest episode of 911 and love the newest episode of Doctor Odyssey. Mixed emotions is an understatement

[atleastpleasetelephone]

Gentle On My Mind - Chapter 5

Initially set in 1967 when Elvis is filming Clambake. Feeling miserable and trapped after the Colonel banishes Larry and the spiritual texts, Elvis invites Gloria to keep him company through the last five days of filming. Gloria is an aspiring movie editor and more importantly she's a lot of fun. Will she be what Elvis needs to get him out of the depressive funk he's in?

Catch up with the other parts here.

Many thanks to @sissylittlefeather being my beta reader on this one.

Pairing: Elvis x OC - Gloria, a budding film editor.

Word count: 4.2k ish

TWs: Gloria's filthy mouth, angst, infidelity, blowjob, fingering, p in v sex, possessive kink, size kink, spanking, Elvis is quite dominant, think that's about it.

Elvis spends that afternoon’s filming trying very hard to concentrate on his lines and not daydream back to his lunch break, him almost dragging Gloria back to his trailer, both of them giggling like naughty kids and probably making what they were about to do incredibly obvious to half of the film crew. Going through additional takes of some of the opening scenes in the gas station, he fights the urge to think about the feeling of Gloria’s mouth all around him as he leant breathless up against the wall. Tries to forget for a few minutes the puzzle of what it was she’d done with her mouth and hands that had made him come so quickly right down her throat. Between takes, chatting to Shelley about how hot it is and whether that makes LA seem more like Florida, he repeatedly pushes the thought that this was the second time he’d left Gloria full of his come out of his mind. 

Gloria also finds herself a little distracted, her mind drifting back to the fun they’d had at lunchtime. But, as she walks back to his trailer at the end of the day, a little later than usual because she’d got so stuck into what she was doing, she reflects that maybe she’s actually learning enough to get herself a proper job. Or at the very least, enough to make those stuffy old men think that she knows what she’s doing. She bites the skin beside her thumbnail a little, thinking briefly about going back to San Francisco, and then her mind drifts back to Elvis in the trailer earlier, his hand over his mouth so everyone on the film set wouldn’t hear him moaning as she sucked him off. She’s pretty impressed with herself for somehow stuffing all of that dick into her mouth and down her throat, it’s definitely a record. 

“Where you been, honey?” 

Elvis is sprawled on the couch, taking up the entire thing. She looks down at him. 

“Got sucked into editing. I’m really enjoying it, I can’t believe how interesting it is when people actually let you do things rather than just making you get them coffee.” She picks his feet up just enough to give her space to sit down, replacing them on her lap. “Thanks for making it happen it for me.”

“No problem, Glory.”

She tilts her head to the side. “You okay?”

“Hmmm. You ever been to Hawaii?”

“Family vacation in Honolulu a few years ago.”

“Did ya like it?”

She nods, her hands resting on his shins. “Mmm yeah. Beach life. It’s definitely a nice vacation spot. But there are beaches here!” 

Elvis frowns. “Can’t really go to the beach here. Too busy.”

Gloria doesn’t miss a beat. “Not if you went in disguise,” she suggests. “Why don’t we sneak off now and go to the beach and get dinner there? Instead of just sitting in here and eating burgers again.”

Elvis is briefly completely baffled by this turn of events, and he’s about to say he probably needs to take at least one of the guys with him, and that he doesn’t know if there will be food he wants to eat at the beach, and that he really doesn’t go places that are so busy… and then he just doesn’t say any of those things and instead just says “okay.”

Gloria sits for a few seconds blinking in confusion. She had been expecting a little more resistance, but since she hasn’t got it she just pushes his legs out of the way and leaps up off the sofa. 

“Let’s go!”

***

They take her car, and he hides in the backseat as they drive off the set. Gloria has a hard time keeping a straight face driving through the gates, thinking of him in shorts and a denim jacket she’d somehow found for him to wear, lying down as flat as possible. Once they’ve got far enough up the road she pulls over and he gets out and into the front seat. She can’t help giggling at him. She’d jammed a baseball cap on his head and made him wear his shades too, and he looks successfully nothing like himself. He had complained a lot, looking at his reflection in the long mirror in the trailer, but he relented when she put her arms around him and kissed his neck and told him she thought he looked sexy. She wasn’t lying. Looking at him now, once the giggles have subsided, she thinks he looks really good. More casual than usual, which she likes. And he’s not wearing too many clothes. One of her main gripes with the movie, whenever she stops to watch a take or two, is that they’ve over-dressed him. Since it’s meant to be set in Florida, she’d have expected him in shorts and a t-shirt a bit more often. And more sensible shoes. She does have a soft spot for that all-denim outfit, especially remembering him changing out of it and giving her her first glimpse of the outline of that fucking huge dick, but it still seems an odd choice for the movie. 

“What’re you thinking about, Glory?” 

She shakes her head a little and looks over at him. “Your fantastic outfit.”

“I can’t tell if you’re making fun of me.”

“I like it.”

“Even this?” Indicating the baseball cap.

“Even that. In fact, you can leave that on later if you want, in bed.”

She starts to giggle again. Elvis shakes his head. “You’re unbelievable.”

“I know.”

He smiles as he looks across at her. She’s just put the top down on her car so her golden hair blows gently around her face under her sun hat. Her hazel eyes are shining with amusement and he watches her tanned arms on the steering wheel. She drives comfortably, seat back, keeping her eyes on what she’s doing but never looking remotely bothered by anything that happens. The car never jolts, the whole journey is a very smooth ride and Elvis wonders if he’s ever been driven by a woman who is this good at it. 

“God must’ve sent you to me,” he murmurs, almost to himself. 

“God?” She asks, spinning the steering wheel quickly as she looks for a space to park. “I’m agnostic, I don’t know if he’d have sent me. Probably would’ve wanted you to have a true believer.” 

She sticks her tongue out slightly in concentration as she backs the car up into a space. Elvis frowns slightly. 

“Agnostic?” 

“Hmm yeah. C’mon, we’re good, I’ve just seen a hot dog stand over there too. I bet you like hot dogs.”

“You don’t believe in God?” Elvis asks, following her as she bounds out of the car, barely stopping to lock it before she runs over to get in the line for the stand.

Gloria shrugs her shoulders. “Don’t think we can know so I don’t try. Maybe there is one, maybe there isn’t. Presumably I’ll find out eventually. Two hot dogs please, one with extra mustard.”

Elvis blinks at the heady mix of theology and fast food. He puts his arm around her as they walk down to the beach together. There are a lot of people, but none of them give him a second glance.

“I read the bible every day,” he tells her, somehow becoming deadly serious. “God is an important part of my life.”

She nods. “That’s cool. I wish I could believe in God but I just don’t have it in me. What about here?” She gestures to the bit of sand just in front of them. 

“Sure.” 

They sit down and start to eat. “You just believe in that white bearded guy up in the sky, or anything else?” She asks, with a mouthful of food. 

Elvis laughs and finds himself suddenly less serious again. “I’m interested in a lot of things. I’ve got this book which shows you how to calculate your number, and once you do that you can find out about your destiny and…”

“Numerology!” Gloria declares, completely interrupting him. “I love that shit.”

Elvis is immediately torn between loving her enthusiasm and being embarrassed by how loudly she just cussed.

“I’m a five, look,” she shows him the bracelet on her arm which has the number 5 hanging off it in the form of a golden charm. “What’re you?”

“An eight.”

“Oooooh we’re so compatible!” 

Elvis laughs. He finishes his final bite of hot dog and looks into her eyes. “Well it makes sense that you’re a five. It’s the number of freedom.”

“Yeah and I am still free from my panties, which I have to say is a very dangerous situation on this beach.”

“Oh. You could’ve brought a swimsuit.”

“Well no-one told me that!”

Their eyes sparkle as they tease each other back and forth, getting in a little play fight which ends with Elvis lying on his back in the sand, his cap knocked off, and Gloria half-sprawled on top of him. 

“Okay, so what are eights like then?” She asks, once she’s got her breath back.

“Great leaders,” Elvis replies, then giggles. 

“Oh, great leaders. I see. I’m just a mad impulsive girl who came to the beach with no swimsuit and you’re gonna be the president or something.”

He pulls her closer to him with the arm that’s currently wrapped around her shoulders. 

“It doesn’t look like I’m going to be the president right now, does it? No-one here has recognised me. Not one person.”

She puts her chin on his chest. “You’re in disguise.”

He huffs. “I was wearing a hat.”

They lie there for a while longer, talking about their respective numbers and debating whether Elvis wants to be recognised or not, and then he looks at his watch. 

“Think we should be getting back, Glory. The guys will be wondering where I am.”

***

Gloria notes the look of disappointment on Elvis’ face when he discovers that far from sending out a search party for him, no-one had even realised he hadn’t been in the trailer for the whole evening. 

“Can’t even pay people to give a shit about you,” he mutters, throwing himself melodramatically onto the bed, even though it's still early. 

Gloria kicks off her sandals and tries to dust the sand off her feet before getting onto the bed next to him. “I give a shit about you,” she says quietly, into his neck. 

Elvis is startled into looking down at her. He can’t see her face, buried as it is in the crook of his neck, but she sounds sincere. “I’m sure you do, honey.” He runs his fingers through her hair. 

She doesn't like his tone. It sounds like he’s dismissing her feelings, which had sort of snuck out of her when she wasn’t looking. She does give a shit about him though. It’s hard not to. 

“Well I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”

Elvis isn’t sure how to respond. He had thought that she just liked sleeping with him. But she has spent a lot of time listening to him over the past few days. 

“Um, thanks,” he mumbles, awkwardly. 

Gloria sighs quietly. Never mind her feelings then. Back to being her usual fun, sunny self. Only one day of filming left anyway. There’s no point in getting deep. 

***

The final day of filming is a busy one for Elvis, and he barely has a moment to himself. He looks longingly at Gloria from time to time, but there’s no opportunity to talk let alone anything else. He keeps thinking back to what she said about giving a shit about him. Running the conversation over and over again in his mind, he feels like he should’ve said something better than thanks, but once he’d missed his initial opportunity she had just started prattling on about numbers again. And not long after that she’d taken her dress off and he’d forgotten all about anything she might’ve said. 

“That’s a wrap!” 

Elvis sighs with relief at the words. It’s fairly late and he’s desperate to be alone with Gloria, on their final day together. Then he remembers the wrap party. There’s no way he’s going to get away without going, and probably staying for most of it. He doesn’t have any excuses. 

***

Gloria flits about the party, talking to anyone and everyone. She loves an opportunity to socialise, and this is even better because she’s making contacts in the industry too. Contacts outside of her daddy and his friends. And because no-one knows who she is, they treat her differently. With respect. She can see Elvis out of the corner of her eye, his flirting with Shelley getting almost completely out of control. She knows he’s trying to get her attention, but she doesn’t care about him flirting with actresses. After all, it’s not as if they’re going to be together after tonight. He’s going home to marry Priscilla. 

***

Elvis is pulling out all the stops with Shelley. Laughing loudly at everything she says that’s remotely funny, leaning in close to her when she’s talking quietly, carefully brushing a strand of hair from her face. Even going so far as to wrap an arm around her waist. Shelley’s enjoying herself but she’s not daft. She can see Elvis’ eyes flicking across to the pretty blonde on the other side of the room to see if she’s noticed what he’s doing. Shelley is amused that Elvis Presley is trying to get a girl’s attention, and in such a roundabout way. She decides to help him out a little. 

“Do you think it would help her notice if I did this?” She asks, putting both of her arms around his neck and looking up into his slightly surprised face. 

“Ah-I-I… I dunno what you’re uh… talking about,” he replies, stumbling over the words but putting his hands on her hips instinctively. 

“Ah come on, yes you do. You’re flirting with me to get her attention!”

“Oh no, baby, I wouldn’t do that… I-I-” 

“If you wanted to talk to me you just had to come over.”

Elvis looks away from Shelley’s amused face to see Gloria standing next to her. 

“Oh-Ah-I… honey, I jus’...” 

Both women laugh as Shelley removes her arms from around his neck. “See you later. Nice working with you again,” she tells him, giving him a kiss on his now burning cheek. 

“You looked busy,” Elvis tells Gloria, sheepishly. 

“I was networking.”

“Networking?”

“Yeah, you know. Making friends who don’t know who my daddy is.”

He nods. “I’m dying to get out of here.”

“Me too. Think you have to do a bit more though,” she nods at a man with a moustache making a bee-line for them. “Let me know when you’re ready to go. You can just come over and tell me this time.”

***

They finally get back to the trailer in the early hours of the morning. They’re barely through the door before they start pulling at one another’s clothes in an attempt to get them off. 

“I’m disappointed I was too busy filming to do this earlier,” Elvis pants, between frantic kisses. 

“Me too,” Gloria moans as he starts to kiss her neck. “And I hate that the party went on for so long. God, I thought we’d never leave.”

He unclasps her bra now that he’s taken her dress off. “When Bill started that speech…” he groans, then slides his mouth over her nipple. 

“The world’s longest, most boring speech, you mean?” She arches into his mouth as her hands find his belt and undo it. 

“Mmmm. Worst. Speech. Ever.” He punctuates each word with kisses that get lower and lower until his mouth is just above her clit. 

She squirms, her hands in his hair trying to push his head further down. He smirks and kisses his way back up her body again, lips finding hers. Moaning into his mouth, she grabs one of his hands and tries to guide it to where she failed to get his head to go. He chuckles as he pulls away from her again. 

“Needy little girl, aintcha?” He teases. 

She nods. “Been needy for you all day, big boy. Feel.” Finally managing to get his hand between her legs, she directs his fingers to run over her soaking pussy. 

He groans. “Bet ya ruined that skirt you were wearing earlier.”

“Yeah, it’s actually a great way to give yourself extra laundry,” she jokes. “As I’m sure you know, Mr. I Don’t Wear Underpants.” 

“Don’t do my own laundry,” he replies, before picking her up and putting her over his shoulder. “Right, you. Bed.”

Gloria squeals and kicks her legs and he gives her a quick sharp slap on the ass. She squeals again, in surprise and delight. Walking the few steps to the bedroom, he throws her down onto the bed so hard she bounces back up slightly. 

“Oooh Mr Dominant!” 

He shakes his head, trying to look stern but unable to keep himself from smiling. “It’s Mr Presley.”

She throws her head back and laughs uncontrollably. “Oh, is that what you want me to call you?”

Still giggling until she finds him on top of her, pinning her hands above her head, his eyes full of lust. “No, you know what I like you to call me. My needy girl.”

She moans a little at the name, trying to wriggle her hands free but unable to get away from his firm grip. “I want you… so bad… big boy,” she whines, arching towards him, desperate for more contact. 

“Think I might want to tease you a little first.”

She can’t resist trying it, despite what he just said. “Yes, Mr Presley.” 

He feels his dick get immediately harder at her words. He hadn’t thought he’d like it, usually people calling him Mr Presley made him feel old. But her cute west coast accent, her fluttering eyelashes and the slightly desperate tone in her voice have changed his mind. He leans down, kissing the skin just beneath her ear. 

“You can keep doing that.”

She bites her lip and rolls her body into his, now he’s that bit closer. “Yes, Mr Presley.”

He groans. Fuck. It’s going to be more difficult to tease her than he thought, if she keeps saying that. It’s going to be very hard for him to not just come in his pants. He kisses her again and then shifts so he can take the rest of his clothes off. Leaning back over her, he starts kissing gently down her body, enjoying watching her squirm trying to get him to move more quickly, deliberately stopping and peppering her with kisses just below her belly button until she’s groaning in frustration and begging him to move lower. 

“Please. Oh fuck. Please. I’m dripping for you.”

His eyes roll back in his head at the description and he decides to give her what she wants, spreading her legs with his palms and kissing her soaking wet pussy. She moans pornographically, hands grabbing his head as she grinds her hips up into his face, completely ignoring the fact that he’s only gently kissing her. He growls against her, vibrations making her moan even more loudly. Grabbing her hands and pulling them off his head, he looks up at her. 

“Don’t think my girl is doing as she’s told.”

She whines and wriggles. “I just want you to touch me…”

Shaking his head, he suddenly grabs her and wrestles with her until he has her over his knee. He brings his hand back and then slaps her hard on one ass cheek. She squeaks. 

“Feel like my girl needs to learn her lesson.”

Gloria rubs her thighs together, desperate for some friction. She’s so turned on she can barely stand it. She’s starting to wonder if she could just just come from him spanking her and calling her his girl. 

“Yes, Mr Presley,” she breathes. 

He bites his lip and tries really hard not to let on how much he’s enjoying this, though he’s sure she must be able to feel his erection digging into her. Slapping her ass again, he watches it jiggle and get red and listens to her moan and whine. Then he slides two fingers into her pussy. 

“Oh, fuck.”

Her head flops down onto the bed as she feels his fingers slowly thrust in and out, pleasure building inside her. Just as she’s starting to really enjoy herself he removes them and slaps her again. She screws her eyes shut and tries to control the noises that are coming out of her mouth as he continues alternating between touching her and spanking her. Eventually she completely loses control. 

“Oh fuck please Elvis please I want you so bad I’m sorry for being a bad girl.”

He chuckles and gently lifts her head with his other hand. “I better put ya out of your misery, huh?”

Her head flops back down again as he starts rubbing her clit quickly, pushing his thumb inside her, listening to the pleasured noises she makes as her orgasm builds quickly and then completely overpowers her. 

“FUCK.” 

If he thought her cussing on the beach was too loud, this was on a completely different scale. He puts his hand over her mouth as he gently rubs her through her high, shushing her. Her hot breath and mumbled curses against his skin. He doesn’t let her lie there for long though, he’s so desperate to have his fill of her.

“On your knees, baby.”

She gets up slowly until she’s kneeling on the bed, looking up at him expectantly. 

“No, not like that. Hands and knees.” He gestures at her to turn around so she’s facing away from him. 

He strokes her ass with one hand and his dick with the other. “All that looking at your ass made me want you like this.”

Her moans start off soft and soon crescendo again as he starts to push inside her. Groaning as he finally bottoms out, he pushes her head down onto the bed. 

“I need you to be quiet.”

She whimpers a little at the feeling of being so stretched in this position. “Yes, Mr Presley.”

Trying his best to hold it together at those words, his hands grip her hips as he starts to move inside her. She presses her face into the bed to muffle the noises she makes as he pulls almost all the way out and then slides in again, repeatedly. Elvis is driving himself crazy too, the intensity of the feeling of her all around his dick is almost too much. He gives up on moving slowly, his thrusts hard and fast now, making her body rock with each one. Her fingers dig into the mattress, trying to stop herself just collapsing on the bed with the force of his movements. He’s pounding her so hard she can feel tears gathering in the corners of her eyes. But it feels so good too. So good that she can feel her second orgasm building in the pit of her stomach.

Elvis is so close it’s almost killing him but he really wants to feel her walls squeeze him again. “Is my good girl going to come again?” He pants. 

“Y-yes… yes Mr Presley…” she pants back, getting up onto her forearms and pushing back against him with every thrust. 

His eyes roll back in his head and then all of a sudden he feels it, the squeeze of her walls around him as she falls forward onto the bed, only the force of him gripping her hips keeping her from collapsing completely. 

“Oh fuck,” he murmurs, and just like the last time it’s only one or two more thrusts before he’s coming too, deep inside her. Letting go of her hips they both collapse in a heap, breathing hard. 

He rolls off her and then pulls her into his arms, covering her face in kisses. She smiles and wraps her arms around his neck. Breath still uneven, he looks at her with grave seriousness. 

“Are you okay Glory? I don’t know what came over me then…”

Her mouth curls into an even bigger smile. “I’m great, thank you, Mr Presley.”

Wrapping a leg around his waist as she watches him cringe a little and blush.

“Oh God you’re never going to stop with that now, are you?”

“Never. Thought you were enjoying it. I know I was.”

He moves to kiss her neck. “Yeah I was,” he murmurs against her skin. “You sure I didn’t take it too far?” He looks up, his face worried. 

“No way. That was so hot. You can throw me around like that any time you want.”

She watches as his face changes from worry to a look that’s almost pride. Then it changes again to sadness as he remembers that “any time” will be over in a matter of hours. 

“Do you have to go back home tomorrow?” He asks, urgently. 

“I don’t have to do anything,” she replies. “But um, no I can stay, if that’s what you’re asking?”

Is that what he’s asking?

“Yes please. Please stay.”

***

Taglist:

Please let me know if you want to be added or removed:

@vintagepresley @arg-xoxo @from-memphis-with-love @msamarican @blursedblegh @returntopresley @another-identityofmine @eapep @everythingelvispresley @i-r-i-n-a-a @sissylittlefeather @arrolyn1114 @jhoneybees @cattcb @polksaladava @lookingforrainbows @jkdaddy01 @ccab @epthedream69 @lustnhim @elvisslut @pomtherine @that-hotdog

[celaenaeiln]

okay so spoiler but

dick beats the fuck out of bruce in batman 138 for drugging and hurting jason and i’m just like “damn you GO dick”

kinda reminds me of someone telling me that above all else, dick is a big brother

but what do you think about that?

OMG OMG OMG FR?!

DUDE I'M SO EXCITED TO READ IT!!!

Dick is chill with Batman on everything but the second someone hurts his family?

He'll tear the world apart.

Titans (2008) Issue #29

What matters to Dick the most in the world is his family. He goes absolutely ballistic when someone hurts them and that includes Bruce. And for all the crap Bruce said to Jason? HE DESERVES IT.

Dick is also fully capable of beating Bruce to bits because like Bruce said

Nighwing (2016)

"Your experiences since you went out on your own have made you more than qualified to be your own international strike force of one."

Actually I want to bring up something about the importance of family and the Roma culture.

For the Romani, there is nothing more important than family. In the medieval ages, they migrated from northern India to all across the lands to all over the world but primarily Europe where they were instantly popular. They were excellent metal-workers and basket makers and in a time when these were the most sought after commodities/talents ever, people were completely taken by them. However local guilds resented this type of competition, so they enforced economic punishments on them in order to monopolize customers.

This time period also experienced a lot of religious activities such as the protestant reformation so there was a lot of religious tension. Considering the Romani's fame and success in things like fortune-telling and how they were from another religion, the Church hated them and feared they would change the minds of "proper christians".

The church and guild worked together to push the Roma out of their society and threw vile stereotypes on them that still last to today. The Romani have been prosecuted for centuries.

Okay, why is this important?

It's partly because of these actions, even though the feeling already existed before, that the Roma culture stresses the importance and value of family. Because for them, it's the Roma vs the whole world. They started forming clusters after the persecution where all those who were Romani would be family. Found family.

Dick, being Roma, takes family extremely seriously. He cherishes them, loves them, and refuses to abandon them. He accepts all their mistakes and success because he loves them for who they are.

Dick is the legendary big brother everyone wants to have.

No matter what happens, he will always protect his family and the good. Even if the threat comes from inside.

So for as much as Dick adores Bruce and loves him with every fiber of his soul, he loves Jason just as much too and there's no way he's just going to let Bruce go for what he did to his baby brother. His baby.

Slay king.

Big Brother Dick's always got everyone's back.

[kit04kat]

Ranking the batfamily most to least likely to become a supervillian. (Plus all my ramblings about why I put who where [disclaimer, i have not read the comics due to me not having that kind of money]) I started thinking about this while reading a fanfiction where Dick, Jason and Tim were taken in by villians instead of Batman and it got me thinking. Anyways, let's get to the rankings.

1: Tim Drake. Starting off strong with our resident boy-genius with stalker tendencies. This may shock some of you, but I look at this human disaster and see a plethora of supervillian potential. You take away this man's adult supervision and the world may never be the same. What was happening with the league of assassins? And the fact that he tried to clone his best friend out of grief? Also I feel like we all skimmed over the fake uncle shenanigans too quickly. I once saw someone say something like Tim's moral code is copy-pasted off a house rules sticky note on the fridge and I agree.

2: Jason Todd. Seriously, we all saw this coming. Now, you might ask me, "but Kat, why is Jason at number 2? Didn't Red Hood already do the villian thing?" And to that I say, Ha! I am ranking them on supervillianiousness(???) Jason had his whole revenge plot and crime lord thing in Gotham but after that was done, he kinda settled out a little bit. So no, I don't think Jason has ever been a supervillian, just a villian, and after that he was more like an antihero/vigilante. That being said, I don't think he is incapable of being a supervillian, which is why he is number 2.

3: Stephanie Brown. Ok, I'm gonna be honest, I was really wavering on the order of the people in the middle. Also, I'm not gonna claim to know a whole lot about the adventures Steph has been through. That being said, I feel like she is just a tad bit more unhinged than the rest of the people in the middle, and therefore more likely to go insane. And if she had the proper motivation, she could totally be a badass supervillian. (Kind of reminds me of Jason in that way)

4: Damian Wayne. Alright, here's the thing. A lot of Damian's character development has been about him overcoming his heritage and learning that the things he learned with the league of assassins were bad. That being said, I don't think he will ever leave behind those ideologies as thoroughly as Cass and Bruce did. I think he sees the world in a lot more shades of grey than they ever will, and because of that, I've decided to put him forth on our list.

5: Barbara Gordon. I'm putting Oracle right smack dab in the middle. Not because I couldn't figure out where to put her, but because that's where she belongs. Listen, do I think she would ever become a supervillian? No, not really. However, if for some reason she had to become a supervillian, she'd be able to do it. If she ever turned to the dark side, it would be completely thought out. Calculated. And my girl doesn't do anything half-assed.

6: Duke Thomas. Now, Imma be honest, I don't know a whole lot about Duke, and I didn't really know where the best place to put his would be on this lineup. I put him in 6th cause I don't think he'd turn into a supervillian but he's more likely than the last three. He probably deserves to go further up the list, but oh well.

7: Bruce Wayne. I know some people will probably say he should be further up the list, but here is my reasoning. Batman's whole kinda thing is that he's always toeing the line. He's doesn't kill because he knows he wouldn't be able to stop. He is Darkness, Vengeance, the night, all that stuff. (It's why Batman needs a Robin) If he broke, he'd be broken. I don't think he'd be able to come back from that (I also disagree with myself a bit, cause there's no way his kill count is 0. I mean, he's been beating people up at night instead of therapy for decades) Anyways, that being said, man is stubborn and has been doing this vigilante stuff for a longggg time. I simply don't think he's gonna turn.

8: Dick Grayson. We are getting towards the bottom of the list here, to the people I think are least likely to become a supervillian. Dick has been through so much. With Renegade, Red X, Spiral, whatever was up with Ric, he took up the cowel and became Batman when Bruce was gone (which is something he never wanted to do), he's had so many of his friends die, family die, and that's not even all! He's been through a lot, but he's also the light to batman's dark. He's been through all that and still chooses to be good. There's no way he's ever becoming a supervillian (even if it is a very interesting plot in fanfiction)

9: Cassandra Cain. Last but certainly not least, Cass. I personally think she is the least likely to become a supervillian. She was raised as a weapon and taught to kill, but she has completely overcome that. She won't kill at all, much like Bruce, but she's also more emotionally sound. Her morals are strict, and she doesn't have to fight with herself to keep them. I love her so much, truly one of the best of us.

I'm gonna put Alfred as a honorable mention. He doesn't get to go on the list cause honestly, if he ever became a villian, it's over. He's have the world in his clutches before the week is over. Gotta respect him for having the patience of a saint.

This was so long! Anyways, feel free to add to this or tell me how you would rank them differently!!

[aingeal98]

Steph for the ask game?

three facts about them from my personal headcanons

-The first woman Steph was ever attracted to was Zatanna. She didn't realise this until later on when she was dating Cass and it clicked that it hadn't just been platonic girl crush appreciation

-She did actually die. The body they put in the ground was actually Steph. Due to reality warping from various villains she ended up in Africa with Leslie who admitted that she hadn't actually let Steph die but tried everything and saw her bleed out regardless. They were both highly confused how she was alive again and they never did fully confirm why.

-She has all the autopsy scars and long lasting damage from Black Mask's torture. She used to play the piano but when she came back her fingers didn't stretch the way they used to and the first time she tried it gave her a panic attack.

a reason they suck

They were created and written by Chuck Dixon, which often meant being a part of his shitty conservative propaganda. She was more of a victim than a perpetrator most of the time, but I'd love to have modern Steph reflect on that and be like "Damn that internalized misogyny was kicking my ass sometimes huh."

a reason they are great

What if the entire narrative was stacked against you, what if your writers and editors looked down on you for being a teenage girl and treated you as nothing more than a pawn in their shitty sexist manpain stories. And what if you survived and triumphed and became loved enough to carve your own narrative. What if people have come and gone from the "family" that once excluded you maliciously but you're still here and kicking, a core part of it now. They put you in the Robin uniform as a consolation prize before killing you but you're still here and you're clawing your part in that history with everything you've got. For everyone that'll say Damian is the fourth Robin there's someone who'll reply "Actually that was Stephanie Brown."

a reason I relate to them

Being an isolated teenage girl who feels a deep anger at the injustice of the world and doesn't quite have anywhere to fit in or fully vent that anger? I was literally two bad days away from going out on the street to fight crime when I was a teen. I tend to relate to Cass more because the specific mentality and issues she have resonate strongly, but Steph also has plenty of material for me to dig into.

(what I consider to be) the top tier otp/ot3 for that character

Stephcass. It's gotta be stephcass. I could give a million reasons but I've yelled about this so much on my blog already. They bounce off each other so well, they've got the backstory and angst and complex dynamic while also being funny and cute together. The accidental romantic narrative they created is so damn good it barely needs anything to canonize it at this point.

five things that never happened to that character that I believe should have happened

A proper go at being Robin. An apology from Bruce. A discussion with Tim about what they did wrong and an apology too. A long talk with Cass after she came back from the dead with (you guessed it) an apology from Cass. Getting to talk to preboot Jason about what it means to be a sacrificial lamb to give Batman manpain and hype Tim up as the perfect Robin.

five people that character never fell in love with and why

-Dean. Even if she hadn't gotten pregnant it would have never worked out. He was simply too old and for all Steph hates herself she would have realized it eventually

-Detective Gage, for exactly the same reasons as Dean.

-Jason. He died before she came along and by the time he came back it would never cross either of their minds to be anything but purely platonic. They can bond but neither of them appeal to the other romantically.

-Kyle Mizoguchi. He's sweet and they could be something but unfortunately she's in love with Cass at this point. Like the entirety of Batgirls is just Steph and Cass being in love and not realizing it. Kyle had the wrong timing.

-Dick Grayson. The hypothetical age difference isn't a problem for Steph. But obviously, it's an issue for Dick. If she were ever to fall in love with him in an alternate universe and confess he'd be highly alarmed to find out why she thought things were possible between them. It might actually be nice for Steph to get an understanding ear and a shoulder to cry on, someone to tell her that it's not her fault and those men were wrong, but that's all. For one thing Dick is not a scumbag who creeps on young girls and for another thing that's his little brother's ex. In no universe could this ever be more than a one sided crush.

[daddysfangirls-dc]

UnTamed Ch.16

Damian Wayne x OC!Female

Prev | Next

Asta pressed the fabric between her fingers. "It's soft," She said as she continued to rub the fabric against her skin. "of course, only the best," Damian said as he prepped her pain meds. She said she didn't need it, but he thought better safe than sorry.

"Who is going to be there?" 

"All of my siblings, father and Alfred, will be present. Although-"

"He won't be seated at the table. I know." She felt him remove the needle and put a bandaid on her. Damian took the fabric from her hand. It was a dress, a simple, long black satin dress.

Soft.

Taking her hand, he helps her stand up, lifts her arms above her head, and slips the dress on. It slips on easily and gently falls on her shoulders. She turns around, allowing him to zip her up. He kisses her shoulder. 

"Shoes?

"no, thank you. The dress is already too much."

"No, it's not. If anything, it's not enough."

"It's just dinner with your family. They've already seen me at my worst. Can't get any uglier."

"Astarea -" 

She turned around. " Don't. They're waiting for us. Let's go."

-

Correct. They were waiting. Bruce sat at the head of the table with Dick, Cassandra, and Jason to his left and Tim and Duke to his right. Asta and Damian sat to the right. As they sat, Alfred began to bring out the food. 

"Thank you," she said as Alfred put the last plate down. " I don't mean just for this. Thank you for caring for, healing, and allowing me to stay here. I know it couldn't have been -" Damian squeezes her hand, stopping the apology rant before it begins. " Thank you"

" You don't need to thank anyone here. You're family, and we'll always welcome you," Jason said. 

" I couldn't agree more," Alfred said as he disappeared into the kitchen, leaving them to eat. 

Asta held little to no Academics, surviving off of luck and animals' instincts. She could read ( not big words), count money, and do the basics as Eren taught, but not much. Just enough. So she knew she wasn't smart, very aware of her lack. Not a day in school being taught by another uneducated street kid, she knew what she needed to survive a day and nothing more. And this never really bothered her until she met Damian's family. 

They were all educated, obviously, with the conversations they were having about companies, investments, stocks, etc., but they also held manners and behaviors. She didn't know how to properly hold a fork and spoon or any proper table manners. Sitting amongst these fancy people was embarrassing, not knowing how to eat properly.

Jason saw this, and he was this. It was years ago, and there were fewer people, but he had been her at one point. He knew how she felt. And he knew how to make her feel better, even if just a little. Switching the hand, he held his fork in holding it in a fist, he hunched forward over his plate. Asta watched as he went from a proper man with manners to someone who had none and simply knew food. Don't waste it.

The others watched, confused at Jason's behavior, expecting Alfred to correct him; he did not. Asta picks up her fork in a similar fashion and eats. They understand now. They also changed their conversation away from work and money. Talking more about simple things like charities and family.

"Who are you?"

"Tim" Dick scolded him. 

"What do you mean?"

"you don't exist. Who are you?"

"I am Astarea, my friend calls me Asta" she said kindly not really understanding the question. 

"Where are you from?"

" Drake," Damian warned him. 

"I'm from here. Gotham. I was born here."

"no birth certificate"

Damian knuckles turned white as he held his fork tightly. She placed a hand on his wrist. "I was born in an alley to a homeless teenage mom. She didn't care if I had papers. Couldn't really afford them either."

"What happened to your mother?" Bruce asked. Asta started realizing this wasn't a dinner but an integration with some food. 

"She died when I was three-"

"You've been by yourself this whole time?" some were concerned, others were impressed.

" Oh no, no, no. um... A boy found me. A homeless boy, he took care of me until I was seven then I was officially on my own. Until I met Damian four years later. And I've enjoyed every moment since." She kissed his knuckles. Damian fought off the smile but couldn't hide his blush. Dick cooed at the sight of it. The others teased. Damian glared. He wanted to throw his knife and fork, but Alfred's presence kept him in check. 

" It's nice to work with someone who isn't completely incompetent," Damian said, trying his best to ignore his siblings. 

"Working with her?" Bruce was willing to look past or wait on something, but her being involved with their cases was not okay. 

"Gotham's Night Orphans," Damian jumped to explain. " It's a group of children and young adults in a crime alley and the Narrows. They work with each other to protect each other-"

"We find shelters and provide food, clothes, and medication. We've been recently trying to expand with -"

Then she remembered. Asta remembered she was planning a meeting with Red Hood and his gang to expand her own organization, but then everything hit the fan, and she forgot.

"So I'm guessing you're the one I was supposed to meet," Jason said  

" I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I am so sorry."

"What's happening now?" Duke asked. Everyone, except Damian, was confused as they watched Asta apologize profusely as Jason waved her off.

"It's alright, you've got a pretty good excuse for why you stood me up" Jason said 

"No excuse I should have tried to contact you as soon as I was able-"

"How about when you're ready we take sometime and have the meeting we originally planned, how does that sound?"

"I'd like that very much, thank you."

-

" Gotham's Night Orphan," Bruce said. Dinner had been far more productive than originally planned, learning more about her than intended but also still having more or new questions. The girl truly was an enigma, giving more questions than answers. At least they knew that she, too, was in the dark about her parentage. Hopefully, they'd learn more together. That's if she learned to trust them more.

"It's not a gang," Jason reassured him. " It's an underground organization run by kids. They do shelter, food, clothes, medication, hiding people-"

"Hiding people?" Tim looked back from the batcomputer 

"Yes, they hide people from their abusers and those who wish to take advantage of them." Red Hood and his gang did a lot of research on the group as they wanted to collaborate. Despite being mostly run by children, the group was well-organized and very effective. Definitely making changes in Gotham. 

"What does-"

"That's all I'm giving you. They're doing good work. Leave them be. " Jason said, putting his helmet on and hopping on his bike, peeling out of the case and leaving the others behind. His night had begun. 

-

"You need to rest," Damian said. He was already in bed waiting for her. Asta was sitting at the desk looking over her proposal for Red Hood and his gang. Now that she remembered, she was eager to get back on track and push the collaboration forward. She had rested enough in her mind, not that it was time to work.

Damian understood the feeling he wanted to work too, but knew rest was needed. And he'd rather rest with Asta than work. While Damian wasn't a part of the gang, technically, he did help Asta organize it better. He helped keep track of abandoned properties they could use and hide those reported missing. He also designed their symbols using his artistic abilities. He'd rather her rest and heal work could come tomorrow, or he could do it. 

"Astarea, please," she ignored him. He sighed, got out of bed, walking over to the desk. He took her pencil and placed it down. She began to protest. He ignored it, turned off the lamp, pulled her away, picked her up, walked her to bed, lucked her in, and joined her.

" I need to work. I-I need to help."

"And you will, tomorrow".

"I have a purpose here now," she whispers. He was too tired to ask her what she meant or discuss. 

"Even if you didn't, you'd always be welcome."

[humanitys-strongest-bamf]

"get me a damned matcha" | Chapter 10: March I

{{ Chapter 9: February I | Chapter 11: April I }} Chapter Directory

the fucking feels i had while writing this chapter kdfskjf

also i used "aniki" for isabel's references to levi because the english translation is "big bro" and i like aniki better so i'm going with that lol

if you wanna get tagged for updates, fill out this form here!

✧ pairing ➼ levi ackerman x fem!reader, college x coffee shop x roommates!au ✧ summary ➼ After you find yourself plagued with misfortune due to struggles in your personal and family life, you find yourself needing to move last minute. As a junior in undergrad with little money and little social support, you considered yourself lucky when you found a sublease that was close to campus and was relatively cheap. Unfortunately, it seemed that your roommate did not seem to be so excited regarding your presence. ✧ content/warnings ➼ fluff, slowburn, mutual pining, idiots in love, mentions of floche being a dick, mentions of grief, graphic (ish) description of a fire, the one bed trope because i'm obsessed with overused cliches ✧ word count ➼ ~5.4k

It's been much too long since you went on a first date. It was at some point during high school when you had met Zack, but even that wasn't really considered a blind first date. The two of you had gotten to know each other through school and things just kind of happened. 

This case with Floche was different. You barely knew him other than the fact that he was persistent.

You were fumbling around your closet, frustrated because you felt like you couldn't find anything acceptable to wear. A part of you knew that what you wore at home when not in your pajamas was fine. Just wearing a t-shirt and jeans to a casual first date was more than okay, but something nagged at you to wear a blouse or skirt.

You were acutely aware of the fact that you dressed differently around others when compared to being around Levi or when you were at home. You were also self-aware enough to know that it had to do with a huge sense of shame. 

You remembered all the passive aggressive comments that Zack would make towards you unless you dressed and acted a certain way. That, plus the distasteful comments your aunt would always give you, meant that you were much too preoccupied with your appearance.

Levi glanced up at you with a disinterested expression as you ran out of your room for the fifth time asking if a certain outfit looked okay. 

He was currently sitting on the couch, pretending to be on his computer typing something, his eyes flashing up multiple times as you were running around the house trying to get yourself together.

"Are you seriously going out with him of all people?"

As soon as you had exchanged numbers with Floche, Levi had the suspicion that something was going on between the two of you, although you never explicitly said what it was. There was an uncomfortable and undesirable feeling building up in his gut, but he couldn't quite pinpoint what it was. His mood had soured for the day as soon as he saw you getting ready for this supposed first date. 

It must have been because you were being more rowdy than usual. That was the only explanation.

"What is that supposed to mean?" you asked with a frown.

"Just thought you'd settle for better," Levi said nonchalantly with a shrug.

He figured the increased intensity of his grumpiness was due to the fact that he would now have to deal with you struggling with navigating a relationship on top of everything else that he had to deal with, especially if it was with someone like Floche.

Deep down, Levi knew that his logic was flawed and that there was an additional factor that contributed to his unease regarding your potential new boyfriend, but he really didn't want to spend the brain power thinking about it.

"And what is that supposed to mean?" you asked, your defensive tone increasing with each additional exchange. "He's been..."

It took you a second to figure out the proper words to describe Floche.

"...nice and sweet," you finally said hesitantly.

Levi looked up at you with a skeptical expression, immediately being able to tell that you were trying to convince yourself of that as much as you were trying to convince him.

He didn't know Floche personally, but Levi was generally good at reading people, minus a certain undergrad that decided to suddenly intrude upon his life a few months ago.

Floche was what he would call a stereotypical fuckboy, and stereotypical fuckboys had a habit or pattern of trying to woo someone before disregarding them as soon as they got bored—the "swine" of undergrad culture, as Levi would call it.

"What?!" you scolded, getting increasingly irritated with your roommate's judgy expression.

"You know he's just going to screw you over, right?"

You scoffed.

"And how do you know that?"

"He's a stereotypical fuckboy, what else is there to know?"

The frustration in Levi's voice was beginning to match yours.

Floche wouldn't leave you alone at the Rumbling despite you repeatedly saying that you weren't interested in him. The rational part of you knew that Levi's instincts were right. This date was a bad idea, but part of you wanted to give Floche the benefit of the doubt, as uncertain as you were about it.

"I can take care of myself," you finally mumbled after a few seconds of silence.

Levi stared at you before looking back down towards his laptop without responding.

He knew that. Of course he knew that. You were more than capable of taking care of yourself, but he couldn't shake off that uncomfortable feeling of you going out with someone like Floche. He legitimately did think that you deserved better.

He didn't know who exactly would fit that or what characteristics they would have, but it definitely wouldn't be someone like Floche. The fact that he was even thinking about this was increasing his agitation. He wasn't a matchmaker and it also wasn't his business.

He heard the metal of your keys clicking against each other and he glanced up from his laptop again, watching you open the front door and promptly step out without a single glance back towards him, shutting the door a bit more aggressively than usual.

It seems he wasn't the only one that was pissed at the situation.

~~~~~

"No _____ today?"

"What?" Levi responded sternly as he glanced over at Nicolo, sounding oddly defensive over the innocent and casual question. 

"Just wondering since she's usually in around this time," Nicolo wondered as he wiped down his pastry counter. "Was curious when I noticed you didn't have a Matcha waiting for her."

Nicolo's comment seemed to bother Levi more than he was willing to admit. Levi immediately averted eye contact and went back to quietly working at his station. 

Nicolo's comment wasn't wrong. Levi did develop a habit of prepping a Matcha for you every day. It was always waiting for you by the time you arrived at the café. He even stopped charging you for it earlier last semester. It was a blatant habit to everyone except for Levi. 

The frown on Levi's face grew more and more apparent. He was rarely in a great mood, but he was much grumpier than usual today. He barely responded to any comments and was in his own head for the majority of the shift. He was even being rough and slightly aggressive with his drinks, when he usually handled his teas with great care. 

Something had clearly set him off before coming in for work today.

He heard the door to the café open.

"Hey look, it's aniki*!"

"Quiet down, Izzy!" 

Two people walked into the café that weren't regulars: a highschooler with red ponytails and a blonde male around Levi's age.

"You'll end up giving Levi a stroke with all the attention he's suddenly getting."

These two weren't regulars to the café, but they were regulars in Levi's life. They were what he had effectively called his found family. He had met Farlan in undergrad when he was in the middle of struggling with his lack of financial aid because of his good-for-nothing uncle. Farlan had dealt with something similar the year prior and was able to help him get something sorted out. The two of them had picked up Isabel a year or two later, with Farlan officially adopting her as a younger sister to get her out of an abusive household.

Levi meant what he had said to you all those months ago: not having a "family" didn't have to be lonely. 

He glanced down at his watch and saw that his shift was about over. He made eye contact with Farlan and nodded before walking into the employee storage room to take his apron off and clock out. 

Hanging out with Isabel and Farlan made his mood significantly better. After calming Isabel down, the three of them walked over to a diner around the corner to catch up. It had been almost a year since he had seen them last. Levi was just busy with his studies and time got away from him. It was one of the many things that he wanted to work towards changing.

The last time that he had seen either of them was last year during spring break. Since then, Farlan had been saving up to hopefully move into the city, and to get an apartment to help support Isabel when she went off to college, if that was the route she wanted to take. When they asked Levi what his plans were after graduation, he simply scoffed and mentioned that he didn't even want to think about prospects that far out, given how early he was into his graduate career.

Although both of them had significant life updates, when it came to Levi to talk about what had changed in the past year, he found himself unsure of what to say. He still lived in this cramped town and he still attended the same university. 

The only thing that really changed was you.

"Not really anything of significance," was all he said.

~~~~~

It was already 10pm by the time Levi got home. He had spent the evening hanging out with Isabel and Farlan, electing to go to a local arcade after grabbing dinner. It was late for him. He wasn't necessarily tired, given the fact that he never really slept anyway, but he rarely stayed out past 8pm voluntarily. 

Since it was so late, he was surprised when he saw someone in front of the door to the lobby of your apartment complex. 

Upon walking closer, he recognized their figure. It was you.

You were sitting on the steps leading up to the door, with your face buried into your knees. Your body was tense and you looked like you were shaking.

"What, did your dumb ass lock yourself out again?" he asked in a disinterested tone as he walked up to you.

You flinched as he stepped up to you and you looked up at him with a somewhat dumbfounded expression. Your eyes were slightly swollen and your nose was red. Your hair was messy and disheveled. Your eyes were wide, as if you were surprised to see him.

"Shit," you whispered as you immediately wiped away any stray tears. "Thought you'd be home already."

You found yourself out here because you weren't ready to see Levi. You thought he'd be home already, so you wanted to take some time to sit outside and gather yourself and make it look like you weren't sobbing for the past hour.

You didn't have to say what happened. He could already deduce that your date didn't go well. 

Levi chose not to say anything and just sat down on the steps right next to you.

"How long have you been here?"

"Not long," you said with a sniffle as you rubbed at one of your eyes. "Maybe like 45 minutes."

"Seems pretty long to me."

You slightly pushed against his shoulder with yours in retaliation for his retort. 

He was glancing down at you. Of course, he was curious over what happened, but didn't pry. He knew you. If you wanted to talk, you'd talk, whether he asked for it or not. It was incredibly annoying when the two of you first met, but it's one of the qualities he's come to appreciate about you. At least with him, you said what was on your mind.

"He blew me off," you spoke quietly as you looked down at the ground.

"Hmm?"

"Floche," you clarified, frowning. "He blew me off. And then not 10 minutes later, I find him on the phone, talking about I'm just-"

Your words trailed off as you felt your breath get caught in your throat. The tears were threatening to come on again.

Levi remained quiet but watched you intently, giving you time to gather yourself to form your words. Whether you were originally planning on telling him anything or not, he was there to listen. 

"-h-how I'm just a pity date," you whispered finally, burying your face in your knees again, almost as if you were ashamed to face Levi. "So I guess you were right."

Your voice came out muffled.

Levi wasn't surprised at this information. Those "I told you so" thoughts ran through his head. It had been less than 12 hours since he blatantly told you that Floche was going to do something to fuck you over—but he didn't voice that.

He watched you as you quietly cried, your face hidden underneath your arms. He felt an uncomfortable weight build up in his chest and he was almost tempted to even lift his arm in a vain attempt at comforting you. He didn't know if that would help or make it worse.

"I'm so fucking pathetic."

"What?" he asked after you finally spoke again.

"I couldn't even get this dumb sophomore to like me long-term. I don't know what I was thinking," you mumbled as you looked back up, using the sleeve of your jacket to wipe away the tears that had recently fallen. 

At this point, your cheeks felt sore and raw from how often you've had to wipe away the tears. You felt a headache rapidly approaching and there was so much pressure building up in your sinuses that you felt like your head was going to explode. 

"I think I was lonely and wanted to forget the shit that's happened in previous relationships," you muttered quietly. It was unclear if you were talking to Levi or yourself. "And of course that blew up in my face. It was dumb of me to think otherwise. It's just how things always are and always will be."

Levi didn't speak at first, but his eyebrows scrunched together at your comment as he looked at you with skepticism on his face. He wasn't sure what merit your comment had or what was going on through your head to make you want to say something like that.

Whatever you were referring to within yourself seemed irrelevant as to why your date fell apart to him. The only factor that contributed to that was the fact that Floche was a dick. Nothing that you did or didn't do was to blame. The fact that you spoke in such a fatalistic way confused the shit out of him.

"Well, what are you going to do now?" he asked in a matter-of-fact tone while continuing to look down at you. "Sit here all night?"

Your finger tapped on your knee as you remained silent, as if you were nervous to say what was on your mind. 

"Can you...can you stay by me?" you finally asked.

Levi scoffed.

"We live together, where the fuck am I going to go?"

"I mean here," you said with a frown. "Can you stay with me for a bit?"

Levi blinked at you a few times, as if he was genuinely surprised by the request. After a few seconds he cleared his throat and nodded.

You responded by shuffling a bit closer to him. Before you knew it, you found yourself leaning on him with your head resting against his shoulder. He was leaning back and propping himself up with his arms, which made contact with your back. 

Having him this close felt oddly natural. You just naturally leaned into him and he naturally drew you in. You didn't tense upon feeling him and he didn't pull away when you leaned into him. There was no tension or awkwardness. There was just...him—and that was exactly what you needed right now.

You took a deep breath, appreciating how unexpectedly nice it felt to be against him.

You mumbled something underneath your breath.

"What?" Levi asked.

"I wish more guys were like you," you mumbled as you twiddled your thumbs together.

Levi glanced down at you without moving, not really knowing how to respond.

"Even though you can be a bit of an ass."

He rolled his eyes and slightly nudged at you in protest. Given the fact that you were leaning on him, you were rudely removed from your comfortable position, although it was only for a moment, with you immediately falling back into your original spot.

If you weren't so caught up in your own head, you might've noticed just how closely you were leaning against him or the fact that he was leaning forward to be closer to you instead of leaning further back and away.

If you weren't so caught up in your own head, you might've noticed how comfortable you were around him, or how interacting with him no longer felt effortful.

If you weren't so caught up in your own head, then you might have been able to realize that you really wouldn't mind if you had someone like him be a bit more involved in your life.

Being around him was easy.

~~~~~

There was too much chaos around you. The smell of smoke and gasoline permeated the air. There was a ringing in your head and you couldn't actually hear anything. Your vision was blurry.

You vaguely heard your parents call out your name before everything faded to black. 

You took a sharp inhale and shot straight up in bed, heaving. Your pulse was going through the roof and you felt like you were drenched in your own sweat. 

You were in your bedroom. The lights were off and it was in the middle of the night. 

There was no fire. There was no smoke or gas. There was no one that called your name.

You looked forward with unfocused eyes as you tightly gripped onto the blanket.

It was the fourth or fifth time that you have had this nightmare within this one night alone. Every time you closed your eyes, you saw some vague scene that involved a plane crashing into a fire before everything rushed past you and left you standing alone. 

You weren't there for the scene of your parents' death, so the visualization was different every time. You could remember the dream in vivid detail every single time. You could barely control your shaking and you had lost track of when the tears first started streaming out of your eyes. 

Looking at the clock, you saw it was still early into the night: 1am. At this rate, you wouldn't last the night. You kept waking up every twenty minutes from the same nightmare and would wake up more and more distressed every single time. 

You didn't want to go back to sleep, but you didn't want to just be alone in your room the entire time either. While the nightmare had a weaker hold on you while you were awake, you still couldn't get it out of your head.

You sniffled and wiped away your tears for the millionth time that night. You weren't sure what to do. You couldn't focus enough to do any work or to even scroll mindlessly through your phone.

Someone shuffled on the other side of your bedroom wall and you glanced over towards Levi's room. He was awake. Of course he was awake.

Without thinking, you got up out of your room, grabbed the throw over blanket from the couch, and walked towards his room. You raised your hand to knock on his door.

You froze and hesitated. While you had gotten up from your bed and moved to this physical location without a second thought just a moment ago, now you were questioning why you were even here.

This is stupid. Why am I bothering him?

"What do you want?" 

You heard his voice and froze, realizing that he had heard and likely saw you fumbling around through the open crack in his door. You glanced inside and saw that he was sitting on his bed, reading.

You were kind of shy about what it was that drew you to his room and looked towards the ground, unsure of how to explain yourself.

Levi finally glanced up towards you.

"Spit it out," he said curtly.

"I..."

He had heard you tossing and turning throughout the past hour or two, so he figured it had something to do with not being able to sleep, although that still didn't explain why you were suddenly standing in his doorway.

"I don't want to be alone," you mumbled quietly. A part of you hoped that he didn't even hear you, but he did.

Levi blinked at you a few times, the frown disappearing off his face. Given the combination of the tossing and turning and how upset you seemed from just your body posture alone, he implicitly understood what was going on.

Even if it had nothing to do with the nightmares, you just weren't in a great state and he was able to tell.

"Come in," he mumbled and sighed.

You slowly scooched your way into his room.

Not wanting you to sleep in the chair, he scooched towards the edge of the bed and then patted his hand down on the opposite side. 

"Just don't get the sheets dirty. I just did the laundry."

If you weren't so distressed, you'd probably make some snarky comment regarding being careful to not get his sheets "dirty", but you instead just silently crawled onto his bed, wrapping yourself in the throw over blanket you brought over from the couch.

Seeing that you were settled, he shuffled and began to get up to go read in the chair to give you space.

However, before he could even throw his feet over the side of the bed, he felt you grab at his arm.

"Wait," you said quietly with uncertainty and a hint of fear in your voice, "don't go."

His eyes went from looking at your hand on his arm to your eyes.

"Please?"

An annoyed expression appeared on his face, although it wasn't directed at you for once. He silently cursed at himself as he laid back down, being pissed that he gave into you—but at the same time, he understood.

You just needed someone to be next to you.

It wasn't like you took up that much space anyway. He continued reading his book as you tightly hugged your blanket, struggling to fall back asleep. You were still scared to close your eyes.

His eyes flashed down towards your figure as he noticed you still shuffling restlessly.

"If you can't sleep, get up and do something."

He's fought with insomnia long enough to be able to tell when it was just a night where it was difficult to sleep and when it was a night in which he wouldn't be getting any sleep at all. Most of all, he knew it was no use tossing and turning in bed for the entire night��might as well get up and try to walk off some of the restlessness.

You buried your face into his pillow, frustrated. 

You were immediately hit with a mix of various scents: fresh laundry, the residual musky scent of his cologne from his clothes that smelled...smooth? You couldn't quite put words to it. It brought you a weird sense of comfort.

"I keep dreaming about my parents," you mumbled, your voice getting muffled through the pillow.

He glanced down at you.

"Yeah?" he asked, closing his book and putting it on his nightstand. 

"The way they died," you muttered, looking up from the pillow, although half your face was still buried. "I haven't really thought about it since high school, but the dreams kept on coming tonight."

You groaned.

"This has only happened a few times, but it's terrible when it does."

He watched as your eyebrows furrowed together into a frown. You were glaring at his headboard now.

"It's been years already," you grumbled. "You'd think I'd be over it by now, but I'm not and I hate that I'm not."

A part of you knew that the only reason that you were this emotionally vulnerable was because of the bullshit that had happened with Floche earlier in the night throwing your entire body out of whack when it came to emotional processing. Everything stung more than it would have otherwise.

Now that you thought about it, the few other times that you did have nightmares usually occurred right after you had a big fight with Zack.

"What have you done before?" Levi asked, nudging you.

"What?" you asked, finally lifting your face from his pillow.

"You mentioned this has happened a few times? How did you cope?"

You looked away from him, thinking for a few seconds over how to respond, or even trying to recall what you did previously.

"Nothing really," you finally said. "My...My ex didn't really want to deal with me when it happened, so I'd either sleep on the couch or just stay up for the rest of the night. Eventually it'd go away."

The frown on Levi's face returned upon hearing about Zack's behavior towards you when distressed. Not wanting to "deal with you" seemed like shit behavior at best.

"You said you lived with your ex before here?"

"For around two years," you said with a nod before pausing. "The more I think about it, the more I realize that it wasn't the best time."

"Living with them?"

You gave Levi a grim expression.

"He wasn't particularly the best boyfriend either."

An empty look appeared in your eyes as you recalled memories of your relationship with Zack. It had started out normal, but quickly evolved into a relationship that was controlling in which Zack was a combination of being a dick, negligent, jealous, and an unhealthy mix of other types of controlling behavior that could only spell out the word 'shitshow'.

"Whatever," you mumbled, your mood now considerably worse. You laid back down to try to sleep again.

"I journal."

Levi spoke up before you could fully lay back down.

You gave him a confused look.

"Or grab an ice cube. Worst case, I go on a drive."

It's been a while, but having recurrent nightmares wasn't an unfamiliar experience for Levi. He's dealt with them long enough and often enough that he was able to come up with some quick coping skills to help calm his mind down. It was similar to when he used box breathing to calm you down from an anxiety attack. He had learned all this through experience. He knew what you were going through—particularly when it came to the untimely (and to be quite frank, traumatic) death of a parent figure.

You remained silent as you laid back down, facing away from him, repeating what he said in your head as you drew circles with your finger on the sheets. Levi also happened to deal with the same thing. You weren't sure if it was just the universe playing an ironic joke on you at this point. 

You heard him get up to switch off the lights before coming back to lay down on the opposite side of the bed.

"Remember: if you can't sleep, go do something."

Despite the apparent persistence of your insomnia and the anxiety that would arise any time you closed your eyes, the knowledge of what Levi had told you, plus his consistent presence next to you, eventually did lull you into the calm of the sleep that your body and mind so desperately needed.

~~~~~

You were fast asleep and for once, so was Levi.

Levi's insomnia was generally relentless. This was the first time in months that he was able to stay asleep for more than 20 minutes, not to mention two hours. 

Even when he did fall asleep, he couldn't ever say that it was comfortable, but that's how he felt right now. He felt at peace for once and he found himself actively not wanting to open his eyes. He rarely got to fall asleep as well as he did just now and a part of him wanted to cherish it.

He was warm in a lulling and comfortable way that was cozy and pleasant. It was a strange sensation for him. 

He finally peeled his eyes open and completely froze once he realized there was another person in his bed.

Levi was momentarily confused as to where he was or who it was that he currently had his arm wrapped around. You were pulled up against him, with his arm wrapped around your waist. His face was buried in your hair, which smelled like your bodywash and the lotion that he usually got annoyed of smelling in the bathroom. It smelled oddly nice now.

His face flared up once he realized what was happening. He immediately pulled away, taking care to not accidentally wake you up. He cursed to himself, annoyed that he even let you sleep in his bed with him. 

He groaned as he began to sit up and get off the bed, rubbing his eyes with his hand to try to shake his nerves off. He should've just kicked you out once he decided to also sleep. 

He froze as you began to shuffle in your sleep, watching as you rolled over to face him. He looked at your face that was relaxed, with the stress from the former night and proceeding nightmares nowhere to be found. He held his gaze there for a few seconds.

Levi wasn't an idiot. He knew that he cared for you in some capacity now, although he wasn't entirely sure how he felt about that development. It just brought complications in his life that he didn't need.

It also didn't help that he wasn't entirely grossed out by the fact that he had woken up with you in his arms. In fact, the only part that did gross him out was that he technically did it without you knowing or prompting for it.

He felt heat slowly rising up into his cheeks again while looking at you.

You actually looked quite adorable when you were able to sleep peacefully like this.

Levi immediately planted his face into his hand upon having that thought, holding himself there in frustration. 

He peeked at you through his fingers, confused and irritated over the thoughts swirling around in his head. He vigorously shook his head after a few seconds, as if he was trying to literally shake the thoughts out of his head. 

Levi rolled over towards his nightstand and tapped on his phone to check the time: 4am. He had fallen asleep for around two hours and it was too early for him to realistically get up if he didn't want to be absolutely miserable the next day.

He sighed and got up off the bed, picking up the edge of the blanket and bunching it up so that it was bundled in between his body and yours so that he didn't end up accidentally cuddling you again. 

His sleep for the next few hours felt more typical to his usual nights: simply drifting in and out every 20-30 minutes.

When you finally woke up, Levi had already gotten up. He was next to you, reading in bed again. There was a cup of tea next to him, indicating that he had been up for a while—or at least long enough for him to brew the beverage for himself. 

"About time," he grumbled without looking down at you.

"Hmm?" you mumbled groggily as you tried to rub the sleepiness from your eyes.

"You were hogging the blankets all night," he said with a frown, blatantly ignoring the fact that you had technically brought your own blanket into his room. "Barely got any sleep. Get out."

You turned to look at him, matching his frown.

"Liar. I heard you get up and lay back down earlier."

You weren't completely awake for it, but you vaguely remembered feeling Levi shuffle around before laying back down. You knew in some capacity that he had actually gotten some sleep.

Levi stared at you with a blank expression.

"...Whatever," he eventually mumbled. "Think what you want."

He was caught off-guard by your comment. He wasn't sure what disturbed him more: the fact that he had you pulled up against him or the fact that you were somewhat awake while he was having those conflicting thoughts.

He was beyond irritated at himself. He let you into his room and sleep in his bed next to him because he knew that you were scared to be alone, and what made it more distressing was that he did it because he didn't want you to be scared or to feel alone.

Levi Ackerman couldn't deny that he cared about you—and he absolutely hated that he cared.

#: @levisbrat25 @gothgril69 @sckerman @berrijam @notgoodforlife @meowjaa @averysmolbear @roseofdarknessblog @bejewelledd @hhighkey @ayame236 @sad-darksoul @velouria17 @kamyru @l1zk4 @layenacreates @lamees004 @whoami-72 @highgoon69 @chaotic-on-main @levishotgf @nube55 @chosos-mascara @heichoucleanfreak @svftackerman

[verishere]

uh

um

uhhhhhhh

gimme a disastrous magical scenario. I have a wizard character whose job it is to clean up after other more irresponsible wizards

i need smth funny

Given I know nothing about how these wizards magic works, I'm going to use this as an excuse to talk about some from my world. Maybe they can also apply to yours, or at least give some kind of idea.

The dancing plague of 1518. That sounds like a fictional name, but no, look it up. That's real life history. Of course, I couldn't leave something like that alone, so I exaggerated it and stuffed into my world.

So the central plaza of this one kingdom had runes drawn all over the damned thing. Each one was applied to the bottom of a brick that would then be laid into the plaza floor, the culprit of course being one of the several workers involved in building it. Or at least, he was disguising as a common laborer instead of an extremely dangerous and also slightly unstable wizard. Now of course it wouldn't be applied to every brick, only the ones he held, but that just makes it funnier.

He sent his magic into the runes roughly 50 years after it was built. No one, of course, suspected anything of the plaza that entire time; why would they? Nothing had happened yet. And now suddenly if you step on the wrong square, you start dancing until you step off the plaza entirely. For as long as you remain on the plaza you will remain dancing, if you step on the wrong one. He also cast a larger spell over all the plaza so that once this effect activated, you cannot mark the bricks at all, or even move them or anything like that without magical means. You just had to guess which ones were safe and which one's weren't.

The event of course ended when the reigning monarch came down to see what all the ruckus was about, thought it utterly rediculous, these people must be lying as an excuse to dance in public, or some kind of defamation against me, so he decided to prove that it must be a hoax. By stepping onto it.

Unfortunately, the king himself was a magic user, and a rather more powerful one than the wizard who'd set this whole thing up, so he of course broke the spells and replaced the plaza's bricks... after about 45 seconds of ballet in front of his assembled people.

Another one was when the same wizard as before cast a spell to change the perceptions of everyone in the entirety of the palace grounds of a different kingdom's monarch, some few centuries later. What he did was anyone who stepped into that palace would be incapable of percieving height properly. If what they were looking at was taller than them, it would appear half height to their eyes; if it is shorter than them, it will quadruple in height to their eyes. It does, of course, not actually affect anything physically. All it did was that anyone fortunate enough to watch got to see noblemen stepping as high as they could very carefully over a small pipe in the ground, or run away screaming when a spider approached. It should be mentioned this did not affect other people, if they saw someone else they were their proper height.

Another time this same wizard (he's a fun guy) some 1000 years or so after the last incident (some other people didn't think he was very fun, he had to be quiet for a bit) was sneaking up upon a diplomatic meeting between two kingdoms, who did not share a language. He cast a spell over the translator, causing her to perceive every word said by one side as a fart joke, and any said by the other side as a dick joke. As in, if one person mentioned someone named "James", then it would be perceived to her as a joke about James' well endowment. The sentence would remain unaltered in meaning, except that always if the subject of the sentence were a person the translator would hear a joke made about that person. So speaking to each other of course, they would address each other by name or by pronoun, and each and every time it was done, the translator always relayed the joke she heard as well.

Fortunately, two of the people there were magic users themselves, albiet extremely weak ones, and were able to eventually sense the magic in the area. It took some time though, and some pain. As in, almost a massive diplomatic incident that would have ended several trade routes and friendships.

I have more, I'm sure, but I can't think of anymore off the top of my head and I need sleep. Hope one of these at least gave an idea though!

[thejesusmaninred]

"The Widow's Connection." From Mark 12: 41-44.

Widows are nations whose husbands, which are the belief systems that create heroes and define their villains have died or abandoned them. The US, Russia, and UK are examples of nations whose primary causes for government have died or gone away. America is still not quite sure how to handle the abandonment of its principals since George W Bush created a false national emergency and shadow executive after he, Dick Cheney, Rudy Giuliania, Newt Gingrich, King Salman, Queen Elizabeth and Charles Mary and others perpetrated what we now call the 911 Al Qaeda attacks on New York City.

I would know, I found the datafiles containing the four pager numbers used by Dick Cheney to signal the aircraft it was "go time", while I was working at Cable and Wireless, and then Queen Camilla like the clumsy arrogant pachyderm that she is told the world on TV she knew about it, and that Charles was going to CW to roll some heads over it.

Russia has also long since been widowed, Queen Elizabeth did nothing for her people and her heir is no good. The Commonwealth of Nations was her responsibility and is now his. Neither was ammenable to minting the money needed to elevate the conditions of their subjects to proper levels and now billions are at risk. Russia is also a British property and nothing is being by the Crown to manage its government or activities and we know how that is going. The same thing is happening to every crown in Europe that is within the line of succession.

The Gospel Torah says God sits opposite the Crown. This means God teaches the duty of the Crown must be done in homage to the principals identified by the Church or the Seat is out of order.

From time immemorial, the crown of the Roman Empire which the UK is continuous with has been apostate in the ways of the Church because it does not put the last first. The Holy Roman Emperor need do nothing else if he or she manages the affairs of the kingdom from the bottom up. There is, as we have learned immense wealth and power to be distributed at the top if we follow this most golden of rules down below.

The poor are told by the Scripture to be meek and mild and not to cause too much trouble, to do as the state suggests and there will be rewards. But the truth is while a positive atittude does no harm, the Christ said the origins of one's salvation came from the proper management of the government. Self-respect is indeed a gold mine, but a properly managed environment is the deepest vein.

So now Jesus says the poor, who represent most of the polities on the planet, have the least have the right to ask God for the most. Since God listens to prayers, He wrote a Gospel, a Torah, and a Quran in response. These insist that the wealthy, who have the right to profit from the government must operate in a manner that provides everyone and everything with a way to live.

We know how to do this and create remarriages between governments and their people they are called constitutions and all the world's major governments have instruments with their constitutions that permit very liberal care for the poor and the environment. Jesus insisted we take advantage of them.

The US Gov according to the Constitution, can mint as much money as it needs to care for the poor and need never pay itself back. The King of England can mint as much money as he wants for whatever purposes he devises, and can do so in any territory for which he is Head of State. Failure to use this immense power to relieve poverty is an unforgiveable sin.

The Widow’s Offering

41 Jesus sat down opposite the place where the offerings were put and watched the crowd putting their money into the temple treasury. Many rich people threw in large amounts. 42 But a poor widow came and put in two very small copper coins, worth only a few cents.

43 Calling his disciples to him, Jesus said, “Truly I tell you, this poor widow has put more into the treasury than all the others. 44 They all gave out of their wealth; but she, out of her poverty, put in everything—all she had to live on.”

Two copper coins worth only a few cents = 4298, דבטח‎, divtach, "she was king and courteous from whin

The Values in Gematria are:

v. 41-42: Jesus sat down. "On this, he was not moving."

The Number is 14924, יד‎טבד, yad tved, ‎"you will lose a hand."

If your sovereign does not care, your nation will be lost. The Church does what no other insitution will do, it teaches of the importance, the means, the manner and the mandate that men must be caring. An apostate sovereign is the death of the ability of the Church to teach people how to live within the God's Grace.

Caring cannot be legislated it can only be taught. A sovereign that willingly obeys the Church is the only way to save mankind from sin.

v. 43-44: Jesus said put in everything. The Number is 13793, יג‎זטג‎ ‎ ‎, izitag, "this is an easy connection."

[the-firebird69]

We have three employers that did not pay you a full amount one of them is Bob borghetti the other is Blake hodus and he might even just send a check over and O'Connor and he might send a check over if we asked it's probably too late to sue for a little amount but she was embarrassing it was went so badly oh no it's 911 and bring it up again and Trump will be examined and O'Connor he was screwing around with Dave and you guys are all victims too is this idiot Trump. At Barber Getty and he's Trump himself and he's a loser he owes him about $800 and he keeps mentioning it he knows you owe it to me it doesn't help you you freaking s*** head and he says that too and he says all sorts of junk and he gets hit, and that's Trump getting hit, and also moving on to O'Connor he was supposed to get about $20,000 more over the few years he worked there same only three and a half years roughly and the check was wrong there's too much taken out for comp and other stuff. There's a few other things going on so and I move on to hodess give the last check but we're supposed to give him severance and they did not and it was Ben Arnold and Mac was mad and you don't really have to do it their payment was pretty good just like $8 too shy and that's odd people thought so it's proof if you have an account he had the account and do it and said we were set up and we should never blame him and we do and it's awful and he ran it and it says $8.50 he was wow that's really weird you know who Chris Boss is he just raised around to 8:50 from $800 I know what it means sore and you're not going to like it and it's coming from the max and I know it is cuz they keep telling me stuff. It's like Max proper so he got angry and he's not Tommy f so I had an argument with him he said you're running out of lives into the ground that's a big events it's a huge event and they tried to bring him up on charges cuz he was involved in 9/11 and they heard you question them and he said he was acting weird didn't want to hear it or talk about it and suddenly he said I want you to leave the room and what you said to him afterwards really shook him up you said I have connections with law enforcement and you'll be hearing from them and he did about 3 weeks later and they came to his house and said they want to hear about this conversation and it was the gang and he started talking smack and they said that's probably good and then he saw them as who they were and he said holy s*** and it was law enforcement and it's like a different division of Mac or something and they start to question him and he said I want my lawyer I said you don't get one in this case and they took him in and they questioned him and he was lying the whole time and he's a Mac wow it's a dick. Make a long story short it's happening again this s*** where they all suck and they all come down on him they all blame him and they're doing stupid things I want him out of the situation and he's going to be the suit of empires working on it he's clods will be out of here and they do have a system in their gross.

We're going to open this lawsuits there's several more most of them messed it up that's all did pretty good Bechtel did okay they're not paying him enough and we're going to seek extra wages O'Connor was paying him far too little and he was worth it and it proved it too we have to start doing this in Mac Daddy's the only one who knows this restaurant are cheaper than hell and stupid this is what the host nation does tries to squeeze the inventor and it doesn't work unwilling bill you don't want inventions than you are going to die. ... The guy is non-stop cuz has you tried to say I was on recording now you're not recording and it's admitting murdering policemen and he's going to get arrested and he's going to go to jail for real in the movie in the near future.

We have several other things to say and other lawsuits to bring up but these people are so cheap and it hurts and we want to show the wrong and the max do too and some people who are stuck here with them. What call dodos the same as we can't change we try and we just are not smart enough and so our son says nobody asks you to change yours and nobody told you that you had to get a bee when the sea is acceptable to him. He went to cooking school and you learned enough to do it. And he's a good cook he made those wings at Gators so they went down and tried it. Trump has been shooting prosecutors and judges and da to try and get out of court and he's going to go down his stuff's getting taken and he's getting killed this guy is a massive massive a****** and he's sloppy doesn't do the job doesn't understand he's not doing it I mean what a pig I can't stand him going to start lawsuits on him and that group lawsuits and we're involved he hasn't even know it's us he's so damn dumb and start suing for companies that we need and we need a few in we have major major lawsuits coming up and he knows about it there's some things he likes but we want to do this and he wants kit car companies that you crashed and he wants a lot of companies that you ruined John remillard and he's going to sue we know how to do it and we're going to get on it all you do is rack and ruin things his brother was a genius is a Satanist but he made life easier you make it harder you're a moron

Bitol and Goddess Wife

Olympus

[queerastronauts]

Prev asked me to share my thoughts so I shall. Sorry in advance.

I've been struggling with my relisten of/catching up with wtnv since what I've been calling Three Parters™, starting with episode 114, Council Member Flynn part 1. Some of them were okay, some of them were just boring, but overall it was a dip in quality that lasted for quite a bit. I'm apparently not the only one who dropped night Vale around this time, and I can really see why. Several of these episodes simply did not need to be more than one part. It was frustrating and uninteresting to listen to, and I ended up taking a break before coming back to the last episode of one of the three parters - a tale of love and horror - just as a breather.

I remembered people hyping up the episode Are You Sure? And was excited to get there, only to find out that it was actually quite hard to get the three endings to work. It also continued the trend of episodes that felt... Unexciting. Like yes, we're messing with time again, whatever.

The next two notable arcs to me are the Lee Marvin arc and the Frank Chen arc, both of which delt with similar material, in my opinion. I actually enjoyed Lee Marvin's story, and was hoping that it was part of an upswing in the writing; instead it turned out to be a hilly road, with still more ups and downs. I didn't enjoy the frank Chen arc, but at least it was spread out, and there were episodes I liked just fine in between. The podcast episode was funny, if plotless, and I liked that they didn't make the "Night Vale is real now" into a one off joke or a non canon episode. It Sticks With You (the going into the tree episode) and It Doesn't Hold Up were actually really good, like solid 8/10 for both, and the first even managed to scare me a little. But still, some episodes continued to disappoint. First Snow. Megan Wallaby is Missing. Even Team Having Fun, which is only two episodes before Silas the Thief (there's a Frank Chen episode in the middle). I thought the plane crash arc was too long, and could've been shorter - really a recurring problem now for wtnv. I lost patience.

The thing is - I don't know if the writing here is genuinely bad, or if it just doesn't excite me. I maintain that the three parters were as a whole bad, actually, but it's very possible that what came after was a return to form for wtnv and I just... Had been too thoroughly disappointed by that full year (!) of mediocre to terrible storytelling that I couldn't muster up the excitement I had had the first time I had listened to wtnv, or the second, or the third. Upon relisten this time I was wearing rose tinted glasses. I knew I loved huntokar before she was even a proper character in the podcast, and I was waiting for her the whole time, for example. That gave me a kind of excitement and impatience that combined into a thorough enjoyment of the first 113 episodes.

Silas the thief brought back that excitement. That twist at the end of part one - and oh how I dreaded that "part 1" at first, see above - singlehandedly brought back every feeling I'd had for night vale that first time I listened to the opening of "a friendly desert community where the sun is hot, the moon is beautiful, and mysterious lights pass overhead while we all pretend to sleep". I believe I gasped out loud.

Both episodes are phenomenal. They are an explanation for something I didn't need explained, but that didn't make me angry - in itself a feat worth mentioning. The character of Silas is built so we hate him but we want, need to know what happens next. His life was exciting! Exactly the kind of thing audiences love to know more about. And despite his belligerent nature, he clearly loves Cecil. That endears him to us even through the sexism and self importance. He's a dick, and I love him. Certainly not the first time that's happened.

Silas the thief made up episodes 195 and 196, and it could very well be just me, or it could be that the writing genuinely got better, but they haven't had a single flop since (note. I am currently at the weather of 204. But this is a pretty long stretch with no flops as far as I'm concerned). So maybe Silas brought back my excitement, maybe it really was just a herald of better writing to come. Either way, I feel like I'm finally walking downhill again.

Listened to Silas the thief yesterday. Still processing. Oh my god

[ratquesadilla]

3005 (chapter 4)

pairing: jake “hangman” seresin x fem! mitchell! oc

word count: 1532

ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/41505768/chapters/108910935

“it’s an existential thing”

a story where the return of north island's resident player leaves a girl with a lot of influence in a predicament.

chapter 3 - series masterlist - full masterlist

----

dogfight football. a game invented by my uncle and its legacy passed on through my father. tom would never admit it but my dad was far better than him at the game. dogfighting had always been my dads thing, in the sky and on the ground. even though pete didn’t teach me how to play, i had a knack for the sport just like him. 

it was always fun to surprise the new top gun aviators. i wasn’t exactly what they were expecting when they heard about a “surprise visitor to make the game more interesting”. they came in expecting someone like hollywood, and left with their ass whooped by me. a callsign-less “civilian”. 

i heard through the grapevine (bradley) that my father had sent out a last minute message, reporting the dagger squad to meet at the beach behind the hard deck as opposed to the base. i had a feeling that the aviators were gonna be subjected to my fathers favorite game, but i had no idea it would be so soon. usually the dogfighting on land happened on an off day, but i wasn’t complaining. 

bradley was an early riser, as were most of the people in the military, and i wasn’t. the only thing i loved more than my family was hitting snooze on my alarm. but today i was awake at almost the same time as him, eager to get to the beach and play some football. it was also the first time since his arrival that i’d gotten the chance the have a proper conversation with my brother. “long time no see bradshaw.” i said, walking into the kitchen and making a beeline for the fridge. 

“i could say the same for you, mitchell.” he replied, turning to face away from the coffee machine. “coffee?”

“i would love some. do you want eggs? im making bagel sandwiches.”

“sure, did you fuck hangman?” he asked, pausing before asking his question. seemingly unphased by the explosive question he just asked. 

“ok first of all, no callsigns in the house you of all people should know that. and second of all i did not sleep with him, we had dinner thats all.” i shot back, sticking my tongue out at him like i did when we were little. “also why do you care? you jealous?”

“never in a million years.” he scoffed. “i would rather stick my dick in a meat grinder.”

“ok well if you get to ask me a completely random question i get to ask you one.” i said, tossing the bagel into the toaster. “why was jake drunker than us on homecoming night when javy brought him to the house the other night?”

“drinking game.” he shrugged, completely unphased by the question.

“drinking game?” i complained. “hes a fucking navy pilot what drinking game leaves him drunk as a skunk?”

“one that involves you.” 

“excuse me? why am i involved in your childish dick measuring contests?”

“okay it wasn’t a dick measuring contest, phoenix and i just wanted to see how far he would go to get an audience with uncle tom. he came back into the bar talking about needing to earn your number” he said, putting emphasis on the “earn”. 

“so you made him drink until he was too wasted to stand?” 

“we didn’t make him do anything, he wanted to do it.”

“you are gonna be the death of me bradshaw.” i opened my mouth to continue speaking but the sound of the toaster finishing my bagel occupied my attention. we didn’t need to be at the beach until 9 so bradley and i had a slow breakfast. we took our time catching up, swapping stories from his deployments and my various experiences with drunk delinquents at the bar. i suspected that my brother purposefully bringing up hangman stories from when they were originally at top gun. he wasn’t overprotective or anything, but i think he was a little weary of what might happen between us. seresin was a notorious womanizer, in the years that they’d known each other he hadn’t changed. bradley wasn’t gonna tell me what to do, he knew that he couldn’t do anything to stop me, but he could sure as shit try. after all, knowing what to expect going in is better than getting crushed with 50 tons of unexpectancy. bradley also made it very known that if hangman hurt me, there would be consequences. 

as we were getting in the car he gave me the classic “be safe, don’t do anything stupid, give ‘em hell” speech, one that i’d heard from my father, my brother, my uncle, and pretty much every man related to me. “should we surprise them?” i asked. “i can wait in the hard deck and make my grand entrance.”

“god you do that one every time.” bradley droned. “switch it up for once. what about the ‘i’m not great at football go easy on me’ routine?”

“ooh i love that one” i exclaimed. “would they fall for it tho? i feel like some of them know what i’m capable of.”

“all the guys there see a pretty girl and lose all their judgement, you’ll be fine.” his statement was returned with various gagging noises.

“that’s disgusting bradshaw.”

“that’s just how they are i guess.”

“like you’re any better.” i replied, rolling my eyes as we pulled into the parking lot. i noticed hangmans truck almost immediately. blushing at the idea of seeing him again so soon. bradley took note of the redness in my cheeks and began teasing. pretending to call hangman over, or whispering the occasional “oh jake, i would love for you to tackle me with your big strong arms”. bradley bradshaw was a lot of things, but he was a child at the end of the day. we got out of the car and began walking towards the beach, immediately being greeted by a hyperactive bunch of aviators. my dad ordered the pilots at attention and began explaining the rules, and i occasionally butted in with my own questions. i was dedicated to my con, after all seeing the look on everyones faces when i turned out to be a secret dogfight football god would be so worth it. 

after explaining the rules my dad split us onto 2 teams, with hondo in charge of keeping track. the first team was natasha, fanboy, jake, my father, omaha, halo, and javy, and the rest of us were team two. bradley and i had been playing dogfight football since we were in highschool, individually we were amazing and together we dominated. over the years we’d created various plays and could tell what the other was doing with the slightest movement. i had never played with bob or payback before i had a feeling they were hidden aces. call it instinct. either way i could usually tell when someone had a hidden talent for the game. 

“you sure you’ll be okay angel?” a voice behind me asked, snapping me out of my obsessive analysis of the teams. “i wouldn’t want you to mess up that pretty face.”

“god i have no idea.” i said, putting on my best ‘defenseless’ face and bringing my hand to my chest. trying my best to look like the hopeless southern belle’s jake was used to. “i’m a little worried.” 

hangman made more cocky conversation and i simply nodded along, trying to tug on his heartstrings, until my father announced the start of the game. my team lined up, hangman and rooster taking their places at the front for the first handoff. 

——

i tapped out an hour into the game, leaving the aviators behind and making a b-line for the hard deck. the cool air hitting me in the face as soon as i opened the door, inviting me to the bar to make a drink to further cool me down. i looked out the windows facing the beach, seeing my new (and old) friends run around like a pack of dogs.

moments like this were rare. most of the people i’d grown up with were either dead or not living on north island anymore. seeing my brother and my dad getting along was a foreign concept after he’d pulled bradleys papers, but their playful competitiveness brought a smile to my face. their relationship was rocky, despite caroles efforts to keep them together. after her death bradley pushed away from everyone, creating even more of a divide between him and my father. 

as i exited the bar and took a seat next to penny on the deck, i realized i hadn’t thought about iceman all day.

it scared me a little, thinking about how easy it was to put him on the back burner.

to be honest, everything going on with hangman was terrifying. my entire life i’d attached myself to the people i cared about, and continually lost those people. first goose, then carole, and soon uncle tom. i lived in constant fear that i would be alerted of my father or bradleys untimely demise. 

did i want to spend the rest of my life with someone who’s life could be taken away in an instant?

[soulmate-game]

Curiosity Killed the Exorcist

“And then, see here? You have to be on the lookout for subtle signs like these. This indicates that he’s…” Marinette nodded as Tim continued explaining, pointing out various body language and other clues out on the Batcomputer. It had only been about six months since the Batfam collectively adopted the little ladybug into their menagerie of heroes, and started teaching her deductive habits and skills. She would not allow them anywhere near Paris on pain of death (some of them had already tried, and Bruce was still recovering from the bruise to his ego. The bruise on his ass from being teleported out of the city and onto the stone of the Batcave was gone, though) but she welcomed any help they could give from within Gotham’s city limits.

Usually, at least in the beginning, they did their mentorship at a distance over video call. But then Tim found out her identity, and Marinette made the excuse of wanting to meet with them in person to gauge their trustworthiness for herself and erase their memories of her identity if they failed her test— and, well, it all snowballed from there until she was teleporting to the Batcave every few days for detective lessons. She was practically a Bat herself, if not for her out of theme codename. And she found herself surprisingly comfortable with the thought of them being a… very eccentric extended family.

Tim was flipping to another saved video in the Batcomputer archives to show another example of his current lesson, when Tikki flew up to Marinette in a hurry. She was holding Kaalki’s glasses. The little kwami whispered something in Marinette’s ear, instantly making the teen blanch and force on the glasses.

“Sorry Timmy, gotta cut this short! I’ll come back tomorrow to make up for it! Okay? Okay! Awesome, you’re the best, bye!” She ignored all of Tim’s protests and rapid fire questions, instead opening up a portal and jumping through it as fast as humanly possible. The portal has barely disappeared before an all-too-familiar voice rose up from behind Tim.

“Maybe I’m still drunk, ‘cause I could’a sworn I just saw a portal closing in the damned Batcave, of all places,” the British-accented drawl was accompanied by the flick of a lighter and accompanying fizzle of a flame. Tim groaned, mentally making a note to ask how in the world Marinette had known that John “Annoying asshole” Constantine was showing up soon, and if he could be in on the warning next time. Bruce, cowl still off, walked over from where he had been sparring with Damian and crossed his arms. He had also heard Marinette’s hasty exit, and made a few mental notes of his own before focusing on the exorcist in front of him.

“What do you want, Constantine?” he grumbled. Any time the blond brit showed up, things only got far more complicated than he ever enjoyed. And he always gave Bruce a migraine, to boot.

“Two things actually, Batsy,” John held up to fingers as his free hand tucked his lighter away in his pocket. His unlit cigarette stayed in his mouth though, probably just for the familiar feel of it. “One; I’m gonna need you to tell me why there was a portal closing when I walked in, because I’ll be honest. The implications there are way more interesting than what I came here for in the first place.”

“None of your business. What’s the second thing?” Bruce immediately shot him down, but John was not one to be deterred. He never fucking was.

“But you hate magic! You make sure I know that all too bloody well every time I pay you a visit, so why the sudden change in heart? Huh?”

“Drop it, Constantine. What. Do you. Want?”

“Fine, fine. I need your help with…”

— * — * — * — * — *

A week later, Marinette was sitting with Jason and Damian in one of the manor’s sitting rooms, the three of them just minding their own business and silently enjoying one another’s presence. Even if two of them would never admit it. Jason was reading Jane Eyre for the millionth time, Damian was leaning against Titus on the ground as he sketched, and Marinette was embroidering a sunhat. Unfortunately for her, Alfred the Cat was currently asleep on her lap and thus holding her hostage.

Even as Tikki flew up to her ear in a panic and whispered, making Marinette prick herself with her needle. She hissed for a second but shrugged off the familiar pain, much more concerned with whatever news Tikki had given her. Damian and Jason were already on high alert from the second that a whispered curse had left her lips, and were staring straight at her and her kwami and Marinette frantically tried to find a way to get up without awakening the cat sleeping on her.

“Uh, what’s wrong?” Jason asked, feeling thoroughly confused and left out. On one hand, he knew that if they were in physical danger she would have moved Alfred the Cat without hesitation. On the other, he did not like the sheer amount of anxiety he could see her experiencing. Marinette’s frantic eyes shot over to him, pupils mere pinpricks and hands mouth agape as she tried to form some sort of plan.

“Uh— “

“Ah! You must be the fair maiden that the Bats are comfortable with using magic around them,” John goddamned Constantine threw the door to the sitting room open wide, making it bounce off of the wall and lightly smack back against his shoulder. He ignored it as he grinned at the three younger people in the room, waltzing in casual as anything. He wagged a finger at her playfully. “I’ve been awfully curious about you, ya know? Brucie boy knows a shit ton of magic users, but he never likes seein’ any of us do our thing. And to not only allow you to teleport without any apparent discomfort but to actively protect your identity from me? Now that’s a damn accomplishment and I really gotta applaud you for it,” he mockingly clapped his hands a few times. “So what’s your secret, huh? I won’t tattle.”

“No thanks. Kaalki, a little help?” Marinette carefully pushed Alfred the Cat off of her lap before diving into the portal that Kaalki whipped up for her, the entire process happening so fast that Constantine couldn’t even get out a proper “hey!” before she was gone and the portal closed. He just nodded, hooking his thumbs in his pockets.

“Ya know what? Fair. That’s fair.”

“Goddamn it, Constantine!” Jason threw up his hands in frustration. “Why the fuck do you have to scare away one of the only sane people in this family?”

“Part of my charm, little red riding hood.”

— * — * — * — * — *

“You know, I’ve been pretty damn nice not teleporting right over to you whenever you disappear. So why don’t you just tell me why you’re avoiding me now that we happen to be in the same room by complete accident, huh?” John asked from where he sat in one of Bruce’s lounge chairs sipping on a beer. Marinette mimed choking him, clearly fed up. He had been trying to have a conversation with her for the past three months, ever since that one time he caught the tail end of her portal closing in the Batcave. Three. Long. Months. And he hadn’t given up, because something about this little Parisian teenager intrigued him. She was sixteen, that much he had gathered from the Bats. But to be sixteen and not only in possession of the Horse miraculous but also clearly the Ladybugs, since he had seen Tikki more than once as well, now that was interesting.

Anybody being in the possession of more than one Miraculous was already cause enough to be keeping an eye on them, which was why he had been keeping an eye on the Paris situation and had pieced together on his own that the presence of Tikki meant that this little parisian teenager was none other than Ladybug herself. Now, that? That was a whole new level of concerning, especially since he knew firsthand that the old Grand Guardian was gone and passed his title down to— yeah, Ladybug.

After that deduction, his interest in Marinette had swiftly switched from curiosity to fuck-I-need-to-know-what’s-going-on-here. Because no kid should have to deal with that kind of weight, and Constantine always looked out for kids when he could.

But right then, Marinette was glaring at him. She had been just coming over for a normal “family” dinner with the Waynes, which she attended from time to time. And apparently they had decided to have Constantine already over so that they could chaperone a meeting between them that would hopefully appease the stupid british magic user enough that he left them all alone again until the next time he needed help.

“Believe me when I say, you’d rather not know,” she replied sharply, glaring Dick. He was the one who had convinced her to come despite her recent close calls with Constantine in the past few days. He studiously avoided her gaze. “I just would rather not cross your path, and there’s no reason for us to interact. Why do you care, anyway?”

“You see, now that is an excellent question!” he chugged the last of his beer and gestured to her with the empty bottle. “Normally, I wouldn’t give a flying rat’s ass. But I’ve put two and two together, since I know who Tikki is,” he nodded to the red and black Kwami. “And maybe I just wanna keep an eye on the new Grand Guardian to make sure she’s doin’ alright. That’s an awful lot of magic and responsibility that you don’t deserve, but I’m not about to try to take it away. Keepin’ an eye on you is the next best thing.”

“Try again,” Marinette shot back, crossing her arms. “You were interested in me before you learned about me being Ladybug.”

“I’m nosy, what do you want me to say? I saw a portal in Batman’s man-cave, I get curious. Sue me.”

“Well. I have Bruce and everyone else already watching out for me, so you can leave me alone now. If I need your help, I’ll make sure to ask every other magic user first before contacting you.”

“Woah, now what’s all this venom for?”

“Uh, maybe we should go and actually eat dinner?” Dick tried to step in, hands up. Constantine had stood up from the chair he was in, which was usually a cue to change the subject as fast as possible. “Before Alfred has to come get us?”

“Maybe I’ll be less venomous if you let the subject drop and leave me alone!”

“Context would be nice, though.”

“Seriously guys, let���s go! Food!” Dick was once again ignored.

“Context is the last thing you need in this situation,” Marinette’s voice was suddenly soft, her arms dropping to her sides. “We’ve had this conversation so many times in so many now-deleted timelines. Just drop it this time.”

“If those timelines are now-deleted, then I obviously don’t remember what’s so bad about telling me why you’re acting like I’m some hated family member you’re avoiding!”

Silence.

Pure. Fucking. Silence. As they all watch with front row seats as Marinette flinches at the word ‘family’.

Pure silence as Constantine’s shoulders drop at the sight of her flinch, realization slapping itself on his face.

“No.”

“See? I fucking knew you would— that this would happen. This always happens, you always hate finding it out, but you’re so— so stubborn!” Marinette was blinking away tears, digging in her pockets and bringing out Kaalki’s glasses. “You’ll drop it now, at least. You always do.”

“Now what is that supposed to mean?” Constantine rubbed his forehead, still trying to sort through his amalgam of emotions. Marinette just shook her head, turning to Kaalki.

“Do you mind showing Monsieur Constantine the way out, Kaalki? I’ll grab you a load of sugar cubes afterward.”

“No, wait, hang on a second!”

A portal opened up under him, making John “Stubborn Idiot” Constantine drop ten feet down onto the hardwood, polished floor of his house. His bruised tailbone would take a while to heal, but his frazzled mind was by far the more concerning development. He staggered to his feet, reaching for the nearest bottle of tequila.

“Ugh, fuck my damn life.”

— * — * — * — * — *

“Marinette..?” Damian nudged the girl with his shoulder, frowning. It was after dinner that same day, and as much as he hated to admit it he had grown to actually like having her around. She was a good friend to have. And seeing her slumped back on one of their sofas, sketchbook covering her face and not a single rambling conversation to be had or heard? It was very concerning. She just made a groaning sound to answer him, prompting his frown to deepen. “Are you alright?”

“I just can’t believe that such a sweet, adorable thing like you is half made up of Constantine’s genes,” Jason mused bluntly from the opposite couch, where he tossed a rubber ball up and down out of boredom. “But now I see where you get all of your Disaster Bi-ness from.”

“Shut uuuuup,” She groaned, chucking her sketchbook at him. He caught it in midair, replacing his rubber ball with it and tossing it up and down in the air. “I’m just frustrated. This timeline is still perfectly stable, so I can’t erase it. And I can’t exactly ask ‘hey, can someone commit a horrid atrocity that makes this timeline split from the main one so that I can erase it and we can start over from four months ago?’ because that would be horribly irresponsible of me. But seriously, Jason. If you’re gonna ever commit, like, city-wise arson? I’d probably condone it right now if only so I have an excuse to use time travel to get out of this situation.”

“Not committing arson unless you give me a better reason for it, Pigtails.”

“Damn.”

“But are you okay?” Damian asked again, seeing as she had completely ignored him.

“I’m fine, Damian,” she finally sighed. “And I know how this is gonna go. He’s going to totally ignore me now, until we meet during some magical crisis and he only interacts with me when necessary. Then he pretends we never met, we have a private little one-sided whisper-argument about how he will never make a good father figure and I would be better off leaving him alone, blah blah blah. Avoidance is a coping mechanism I guess I inherited from him.”

“Guess it’s a good thing I’m trying to bite that in the bud then, eh?” Marinette startled out of her sitting position, seeing John stumble into the room…

Drunk off his ass. But apparently still at least mildly coherent.

“I agree with deleted-me’s, I’m not gonna be a dad. Not me,” he tripped, landing on his still-bruised ass and hissing in pain before continuing from the floor; “So if you’re looking for another Daddy dearest, that ain’t me.”

“See, I knew this is how you’d—”

“Let me finish,” he interrupted. “I don’t know how long the booze is gonna last and I need it’s courage here. ‘Kay? ‘Kay. Where was I? Right. But I know magic, ya know. The kind that doesn’t rely on little bobblehead gods to do. I got— like, a million books. Shit ton of books. At my place. Ya can read ‘em. My books. At my place. But I ain’t gonna parent, but I can lend ya books. Maybe give magic advice. Teach a little. Little bit. Didn’t think I’d have a child, but apparently I do and she’s the fuckin’ grand guardian and a damn hero, and I don’t know how the fuck I was able to help make someone like that. But whatever, it’s not like the world’s ever fuckin’ been easy on me,” He pulled out a sample-sized bottle of whiskey from one of the pockets on the inside of his trench coat and chugged it. After a brief wince and hiss at the burn, he kept rambling. “My door’s open, is what I’m tryin’ to say. No guarantee I’ll be in any state to talk to when you walk through it, but it’s open.”

Deciding to steadfastly ignore the tears streaming down her face, Marinette just swallowed thickly and nodded.

“I, uh. I think I can work with that.”

John barely made it to the nearby bin in time to vomit into it.

— * — * — * — * — *

I hate my imagination sometimes, guys. I started imagining a convo between Mari and Constantine at like 4am and it wouldn't leave me alone until I got it down. but by the time I wrote it, I kinda forgot like 60% of the original convo and just winged it. And this was born. I 100% blame @multifandomscribette because their Bio!dad John Constantine headcannons are amazing and even though this isn't in that universe, those headcannons are exactly what inspired this. So blame them, lol.

[pynkhues]

What did u think their reactions were when they heard kendall nearly drowned/tried to commit suicide? I’ve been thinking about this for a week and i just can not imagine it. Like who told them? What did they say? Were they all together when they heard?just ???

This question lives rent free in my mind, anon. I love and respect the show's choice not to show us any of the immediate reactions, but man, a big part of me wishes we'd gotten to see them too.

I do tend to think they were mostly together when they found out, with the exception of Connor and Caroline. Given the framing of the episode and the lighting, I tend to think that Kendall's drowning in the pool at the same time the fallout of Roman's dick pic is happening, and given drowning only takes 10 to 12 minutes at most (with many estimates a lot shorter than that), Comfrey must've found him and taken him to hospital pretty quickly.

In that sense too, I do think Comfrey likely was the one to tell them, or - - god, y'know what? She probably called Greg, who told Tom, who told them. I've always thought it was the hospital who would've called, but this kind of makes more sense given the way the opening scene of 3.09 plays out.

As for the reactions, I think for Shiv and Roman there would've been a messy mix of guilt and hurt and deflection all rolled into one. They both have a reason to feel at fault after all, between Shiv's letter, and Roman delivering Logan's offer and pushing Kendall at his birthday party. I can see Roman trying to diffuse the situation with humour like he did in 3.09 and Shiv sort of shutting down / shutting people out.

It raises this interesting question though as to whether or not something like this has happened before. I think something has between comments characters have made across the seasons like Logan asking Greg to keep an eye on him and his worry in 2.04, and Roman's immediate worry and action in 1.08, although I suspect previous incidents were likely more drug-related, which probably would've informed their reactions too.

As for Logan - - I actually don't know. I think he would've swallowed any guilt and blame and shame he felt, although I do think you could argue him taking Kendall's kids in was probably a potent cocktail of emotion – a way to control the situation (and potentially Kendall / a way of forcing Kendall to see him when he was out of hospital), a means of remorse and comfort-seeking, a performance, a duty, who's to say? We saw so little of him in that last episode, and it kills me too that we really got no proper scene with Kendall and him in the aftermath of it too. It makes me so curious as to what their first scene together in s4 is going to look like.

I'm not sure though! What do you guys think?

[taestefully-in-luv]

Always You | JJK (Five)

Summary: you and Jungkook have been best friends since freshmen year of college, there’s a lot of unsaid feelings and tension but neither make a move. what happens when his friend Taehyung (also your crush) needs a fake girlfriend?

Pairing: Jungkook x Female reader, slight Taehyung x Reader

Genre: friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, slight slow burn, roommate au, college au, SMUT (starting ch2), fluff, angst (in later chapters) slight crack, lots of drama

Word Count: 12.1k

Warnings: Swearing, alcohol consumption, sexual tension (?) sad oc, mentions of sex, kind of over the clothes action, drama, heated dance session lol, slight memory of sex, hair pulling, back scratching, mention of boner, second chances (?)

Notes: Okay, first of all THAT 1st TEASER PIC!!! DID WE SEE THAT? *chefs kiss*. Anyway thanks for comments you guys leave I really love reading them!!! Remember to send an ask if you want to be added to the taglist or just want to chat about the story:) have a great week everyone!

Taglist: @mooniyooni @thisartemisnevermisses @giadalin @kookiebunny097 @cosmosjk @moonchild1 @just-jeon @anpanman-sonyeondan @starlight-night0 @yessii-i @apollukee @mikasaredscarf1 @kaye-rosales @bunnyjeonjk @dyriddle @seagulljk @hass-mich-los @peachy-skz0325 @wonusbitch

© taestefully-in-luv

Previous --- Next

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May

Gloomy: The dictionary may describe it as hopeless and despairing but really it should just be a picture of your sad, sad face.

1 month…yes, one whole month has passed since you last spoke to Jungkook. No text, no calls, no random show ups, nothing. Gloom. Gloom. Gloom. Graduation came and gone so quickly…you walked the stage with your friends minus two but honestly you can hardly remember the event. You tried your hardest to be as excited as everyone else but the feeling of gloom stayed with you.

By the end of the month you finally started accepting he isn’t coming back and right around that time you actually heard from him—Jungkook that is. He sent you a pathetic text that he’s moving out and will be by to retrieve his things. More gloom.

The next couple weeks after that are a blur, you recall the sound of movers throughout your apartment. You didn’t have the courage to speak to him…you didn’t have the courage to even leave your room if you didn’t have to. You were so wrapped up in everything you didn’t even consider that fact that you will have to find a new roommate to cover the other half of the rent.

Every day just dragged on, every day a repeat of the last. Wake up, drown in black coffee, scroll mindlessly through your phone and work your full time job. You called in sick too many days already so you have to go or you’re at risk at getting fired. The same day, every day. The same gloomy fucking day.

Jimin tried to call or text every day to make sure you were like, alive. He apologized over and over for not telling you as soon as he found out about the Taehyung situation but he felt that if Taehyung was going to tell you then it is best it comes from him and not Jimin. You can understand that. He also frequently would show up at your apartment to surprise you but you rarely let him in. You did feel bad though, he’s just trying to be there for you.

Jimin 6:04pm

Please let me in?

Jimin 6:05pm

Well…I have some take out for you babe, ill leave it on the doorstep.

Jimin 6:05pm

Call me sometime ok? Love you

Guilt would consume your body but you just couldn’t deal with human contact right now.

June

Around month 2 you finally felt okay to see people again—your close people that is—aka Jimin was finally allowed in, he made you take a hot bath while he cleaned up for you and made you a proper meal. The amount of instant ramen containers lying around the place was by far one of the grossest things he’s seen. The shit that was growing…he shudders just thinking about it.

He would come over every day after work in the evenings. He left day time babysitting to Trina.

“Girl…all this over a boy?” she would constantly say.

You also tried applying for job after job, but the postgraduation life is harder than you thought…at least for you. Jimin landed a job as a kids choreographer, Trina starts up at one of the local elementary schools as a kindergartner teacher and you? You’re still working at the bakery down the street. You applied for many entry level positions in the marketing field but failed miserably in interviews…which only further discouraged you and worsened your mood.

It was also around this time you decided to finally delete Jungkook off all social media and block his number. You refuse to hear from him at this point…not that he was reaching out or anything. You wonder what he’s up to postgraduation? No, you don’t want to know or care. You considered hanging up a picture of his face on your wall so you could throw darts at it but you decided that was maybe on the crazy side. Taehyung sends you weekly texts, asking about how your day/week is going. He updates you on his life as well, apparently he got the curator assistant position at the museum that he wanted. You still feel hurt over everything but you are happy for him. It’s funny, you feel so betrayed over that but Jungkook is the cause of your gloom.

Every day just drags on, you feel heavy everywhere you go. Even when you’re just at home in bed.

By the end of the month your friends somehow convinced you to go on a date—a horrible date at that.

He was awkward as hell, a bad kisser and would lightly…tap your ass in attempt to be sexy. It was a disaster, you don’t even remember what the two of you even talked about at dinner. You just remember his tongue being horribly shoved down your throat and his weird ass tapping habit.

July

Then month 3 finally came around. A month where the weeks went by breathing became just a bit easier. Yes, any and everything still reminded you of Jungkook but it didn’t hurt as terribly as the previous months. By the end of the month you even agreed to your first real social outing. You are hesitant, but you agreed…

“I don’t know guys…a birthday party? We like, don’t even know the girl?” you frown, nibbling on the flesh of your bottom lip.

You are sitting in the middle of your bedroom floor, clothes piling all around you as you try to decide on what to wear.

“You need to get out babe…plus it’s a friend of a friend, so it’s cool.” Jimin says holding up a rose colored crop top, motioning for you to nod yes or no to his suggestion. You cock your head to the side, deciding what pants to go with it.

“I have to say I agree with Jimin, y/n.” your new roommate Holly chips in, “Since I’ve moved in I don’t think I’ve seen you go out even once.”

“Also a party is the best place to find some easy dick.” Of course that’s what Trina has to offer.

“Yes to the crop top Jimin.” You point your head towards the shirt, “Okay don’t have to call me out like that Holly.” You glare at your roomie, “And Trina, we both know I ain’t ready for no type of dick.”

“So we’re looking for some pussy tonight?” Trina smirks, “Nice.”

You rolls your eyes, a chuckle escaping your lips, “Shut up.” you throw a pair of shorts at her face.

“But seriously y/n…Maybe Trina is on to something…” Jimin sits down next to you, crossing his legs in front of him, “Maybe this is a good chance to like—”

“If you say move on I will literally kill you.” You cut in, “There’s nothing to move on from!” you throw your hands up dramatically. “Taehyung used me, Jungkook wants nothing to do with me. And—”

“Then why aren’t you ready for any type of dick?” Holly puts in her 2 fucking cents.

“Because I don’t want to be associated with any boys! Jimin is the exception.”

“Somehow I don’t feel flattered by that…” Jimin puts a hand on your shoulder.

“When’s the last time you got off?” Trina abruptly asks. You turn your head in shock at her shamelessness.

“Trina!”

“Answer her, I’m curious too.” Jimin squints at you trying not to laugh.

“It’s…” your eyes slide to the side, “It’s been a while.”

Trina shakes her in disapproval, “Damn girl, really? My fingers constantly playing DJ, you know what I’m sayin?” Trina goes in for a fist bump but you just push her hand away.

“You’re gross.” You laugh out loud, and it sounds like music to everyone’s ears.

“I’m just real babey.” She flicks her hair back with a proud smile on her face.

Having these 3 around has no doubt helped you deal with the loss you feel. You feel like you are still mourning the dead. How’s Jungkook even doing? You’re too afraid to ask Jimin. Too afraid that he’s doing amazing without you. He must of realized how much better off he is without you around and that makes you feel small.

“Fine…” you mutter under your breath…Jimin snaps his head to look at you, his sly smile growing as he watches you fiddle with a short mini skirt.

“Fine what?” Trina asks with a smirk.

“Let’s find me some dick tonight.”

“Hell fucking yeah.” Jimin claps his hands together, “Tonight is about you!”

“y/n makes her debut tonight! She’s hot, she’s single and she is ready to mingle!”

You can’t help but giggle, your hands bunching up the material of the mini skirt as you look down at it, making your decision.

“Let me get ready and we can get this night started!” you rush to your feet, all the sudden feeling excited for tonight. You are going to actually do your hair and your makeup—you even shaved. You are definitely breathing easier tonight and you have to take advantage of that!

“Let’s do shots as we wait girlies,” Holly shows a bottle of rum she had hiding behind her back, shaking it in excitement.

“Naughty girl.” Jimin winks, standing to his feet, heading towards the kitchen to grab some shot glasses.

You get ready quickly, but taking your time where it counts. You give yourself a once over in the mirror and you have to say you are impressed. Your black jean mini skirt sits right below your ass, while your tits pop in this rose crop top. You wear short heels, and simple jewelry with just the right amount of makeup that makes your features stand out, and you have to say you would kiss yourself if you could—you look fucking good.

“woooooo” Jimin and Trina whistle out at the same time as they walk back in your bedroom.

“I’d fuck.” Jimin says plainly.

“Same as fuck.” Trina says bluntly as she swallows down a shot.

“Yeah you look pretty y/n!” Holly smiles, not really on the same level of honestly as your other two friends.

You burst into giggles, throwing your head back in approval. “Thanks guys…..Lets fucking do this.” You walk towards Trina and grab her shot glass, and you take the bottle from Holly, pouring yourself a shot.

“Ready to fucking mingle.” You gulp down the rum, the burn only encouraging you, the warmth stinging your entire chest and you couldn’t feel more content.

This house was one of the bigger ones, it was full of people and more people and like, more people. You managed to swallow down 3 or 4 shots back at your apartment and the alcohol is definitely working its magic on you, the world just a little nicer.

The amount of people doesn’t even bother you like it usually would, instead you find yourself barging through the front door and making your way to the dance floor with your 3 friends trialing behind you.

The heat of the living room is already intoxicating you, the amount of bodies rolling and grinding makes you feel loose and free. Before you know it Jimin is pushing a drink into your hands and you hug him gratefully as you begin chugging it back.

“Woah slow down, we have all night—actually fuck it, I like your spirit tonight!” he chuckles lightly, his hands going to your waist, rocking you to the beat of the blaring music. Trina and Holly disappear into the kitchen to grab more drinks while you and Jimin dance to whatever b…t…ah, forget it, you forgot the band’s name.

“Are you having fun?” Jimin slurs out, his eyes barely visible as he laughs at nothing.

“So much fun!” you yell out over the music then you lean down into his ear and whisper, “Thanks so much Jiminie…I know I was a little difficult…”

“A little?” he teases.

Jimin’s eyes travel behind you before they are widening. You notice, of course. You are about to turn your head to take a look at whatever he is seeing when his snaps back to you in panic, his troubled smile growing.

“Let’s go find Trina and Holly, yeah?” he tries to usher you toward the kitchen and you oblige. Too drunk and feeling too good that his odd behavior goes ignored by you.

“Kay!” you smile, hooking your arm with his. “Letsa go!” you say like you’re fucking Mario.

The two of you walk to the kitchen, finding Trina and Holly playing a game of beer pong with two random guys.

“Hello my bitches!” Trina hollers over the thumping bass, as she scores a cup of pong, her other hand on Hollys lower back.

“Wait, gotta use the bathroom, be right back!” you slur into Jimin’s ear, he just nods distractedly as he watches the game, laughter erupting his body for probably no drunken reason.

You walk back into the living room and start heading towards the other side where the bathroom is. The journey to the bathroom is fun, you accidently bump into a lot of people but they don’t seem to mind as they will just drunkenly smile at you and you would smile back in your own drunken daze. You skim the room with a dopey smile on your face, just admiring the crowd. You are shocked with yourself…you missed people and you cannot believe it. You continue to observe when your eyes land on tattooed hands. The hands are grabbing a handful of ass on the dance floor. You know these hands. Your eyes travel from his hands to his strong arms to his face…it is hiding in the nook of some girls neck and you feel like someone knocked the wind out of you. Jungkook.

He is kissing on some girl, no doubt leaving bruises behind from his attack on her neck. His hands cupping this girls ass so tightly, he guides her hips into his. You watch as she throws her head back in pleasure and you see him smirk. All his signature moves. You are left speechless. What could you even say? Why does this hurt? Why does this make you feel fucking sick? Why does it feel like you aren’t supposed to be witnessing this? Well, you know why but god, why?!

“y/n!!” It’s Jimin, jogging up behind you, “Fuck, I was trying to avoid you seeing this…” he admit softly, “I swear I didn’t think he was going to be here tonight…he didn’t seem that interested when I asked him about it…”

“It’s fine Jimin…” you mumble.

“Does it feel weird? Seeing him with this girl…?” Jimin is obviously trying to get you to admit something right now but you are not in the right head space to even give it a second thought.

“Why should it? Plus I’m used to this…she’s just some random girl for one night.” You twirl the ends of your hair between your fingers.

“Oh babe…” Jimin glances down at the ground, “This girl…she…he’s brought her to every party for the last month…” Jimin sounds as sorry as you feel.

The same girl? That’s impossible, you scoff. There’s no way Jungkook is actually seeing someone. But that doesn’t stop your stomach from twisting and turning and making you feel fucking sick.

“What do you mean?” you finally slur out, leaning your frame on Jimin.

“He brings her and they leave together too…” Jimin holds on to you, “I haven’t really asked him about her though.”

“Whatever. Fuck him, right? I won’t let this ruin my night.” You smile coyly, draping your arms around your friend. “Bathroom please.” You pout theatrically, pointing your head towards the bathroom.

“Okay let’s get you peeing in peace.” Jimin laughs, guiding you towards the door.

Once at the door, you knock a couple times to find that it is empty, “I’ll wait for you out here.” Jimin assures you.

Once inside the small room, you bunch up your skirt and pull down your panties, squatting on the toilet. You sigh in relief as you pee, but the relief you feel in your body stops when you recall the way Jungkook held and kissed this random but not so random girl.

Why should it bother you? It’s about time Jungkook got serious! But why did he have to dump you to achieve that? And why did It have to be with someone el…

You reach for the toilet paper, ripping it after a few sheets and wipe yourself as you drunkenly sing a tune. So what? You can easily replace Jungkook too!

You stand up, pulling your panties up and your skirt down and take a long good look in the mirror. Your hair is still intact, your makeup is only a little smeared—quick fix, and your tits are still poppin’. This night is just beginning, you decide. A whole new wave of confidence begins washing over you.

“Ready!” You pounce on Jimin’s back, he stumbles forward while laughing wholeheartedly.

“Should we look for Trina and Holly again? They’re probably still playing beer pong!”

“Sure.” You smile, walking hand in hand with Jimin as you make your way back to the kitchen.

Hours pass and you are now outside on the back porch piss drunk with your 3 friends and a couple new friends. Nick and his pal that you can’t remember the name of—but you remember Nick. He’s really tall and has nice muscles covering his body, his light hair is messy and looks like you would have fun pulling it.

“And that’s why I think aliens are already here bro, like they are probably here at this fucking party bro.” No name friend finishes his point. Nick holds in his chuckle as his drunk friend rambles.

“Totally bro.” Then his eyes land on you. Fuck, were you staring? Oh well, it’s best to get to the point. You two have been making eyes at each other all night and it’s time to make the next move.

“Hey Nick, wanna grab a drink with me in the kitchen?” you inquire with a sly smile.

Jimin’s eyes widen before he’s smirking “Don’t be silly, wrap that willy.”

Trina and Holly laugh at Jimin’s words while you turn fucking red with embarrassment.

“Sorry about him…” You excuse Jimin, but you continue to smile slyly.

Nick grins with all his teeth as he takes your hand and leads you back inside the house. His hand is much larger than yours and you are already imagining what his beefy fingers will do to your vagina. God, what’s his dick like???

You enter the kitchen and you and him walk towards the cooler full of beers, he lets you stand to the side as he goes to grab them.

“Nick!!!!” you hear a familiar voice and you wince. Jungkook stands next to the cooler, his hand wrapped around the girls hand, but he briefly lets go of it to dap up your fuck for the night.

“What’s up bro!” Nick returns the handshake, a wide smile on his face.

They know each other?

“I thought you said you weren’t coming tonight?” Jungkook’s hand goes back to holding on to the girl.

“I wasn’t going to but,” he nods towards you, “Glad I did.” He winks. Jungkook’s eyes follow Nicks nod and when he sees you stand there awkwardly he goes completely pale. Your eyes meet uncomfortably, Jungkook let’s go of the girls hand without a second thought.

“y/n?” he questions with a pained expression.

“You know her?” Nick asks, totally out of the loop.

You shift from one foot to the other, not really sure what to do or say. So you settle for his name. “Jungkook.” It feels foreign on your tongue. Like if you said it 3 times in a mirror a sinister ghost would come to murder you.

Jungkook opens his mouth then closes it then opens it then closes it again.

“Baaaaabe,” the girl next to him whines, “let’s get out of here already.” She says, not even acknowledging your existence.

Jungkook shamelessly eyes you up and down, his shock is very evident as he looks at you.

You can’t help but smile a little, knowing you look damn good.

“Let’s go too, Nick.” You saunter to his side, grabbing a hold of his bicep.

That’s when Jungkook knocks out of daze, his brows crease as he looks between the two of you.

“Wait—you and Nick?” he asks, completely amused.

“Is that a problem?”

“Nope.” Jungkook looks fucking smug as he smiles, his hand going to grab the girls hand again. “See you later?” he asks you. You of all people! “Uh? Probably not?”

“I wouldn’t be so sure of that.” Jungkook winks, turning around to leave as he leads his girl out.

Nick just continues to smile, completely oblivious, “So cool that we all know each other!” he grips on to your waist.

“Wait, how do you know Jungkook?”

“We—”

“Wait, it honestly doesn’t matter. Let’s just get out of here.”

“My place?” Nick breathes into your ear, he pushes your hips into his crotch so you can feel his half hard cock.

“Why are you already getting hard?” you tease, leaning up to kiss his neck.

“Honestly, I can’t stop staring at your tits. And I am imagining all the things I want to do to them.” He confesses hotly.

The uber ride to his place is short, only 10 minutes and it goes by quickly as you two have one another’s tongues down each others throats. His hands traveling all around your body, he even manages to slip his fingers past your panties to feel how wet you are.

“Fuck I can’t wait to get you inside…” his rapid breaths fan across your face as you nibble on his neck.

“Gonna fuck me?” you whisper quietly, not trying to get heard by the Uber driver, but you could also hardly care if he hears you or not, he gets 5 stars.

“Want you to ride me.” He palms his cock through his pants as he imagines you bouncing on his cock for him.

“If you deserve it like a good boy.” You replace his hand with your own, rubbing him ferociously over his jeans. You haven’t felt dick in months and the feeling is driving you absolutely wild, you haven’t felt this needy in a long time.

The Uber comes to a stop, parking in front of an apartment building. He lets the two of you know you reached your destination. You and Nick giggle as you thank him and stumble out of the car as you follow him to his apartment. He would stop every few seconds to plant kisses on your lips and grab your ass with a tight squeeze. He groans and rolls his eyes back as he explores your body.

“Wait til we’re inside,” you breathe out, your voice silky as hell.

Finally, after a short, kiss filled elevator ride later you arrive at his front door. His lips never leaving yours as he pulls out his keys, fumbling with them until he finds the right one.

He pulls away for a second to unlock the door and desperately pushes it open to let the two of you inside. Your lips are already back on his as you two trip into the entry way of the apartment, you walk him backwards, until his back is against a wall.

The apartment is dark besides the living room TV, you take a second to pull back and admire Nick’s fucked out expression, the blue glow of the TV making everything feel surreal.

You dive back in to kiss him, he prods his tongue into your mouth, swirling it around with yours making you moan into his mouth.

“Hi guys!”

Your eyes shoot open, mouth still attached to Nicks. You push your head back, disconnecting from Nick and yank your head to the left where you see a wild Jungkook sitting on the living room sofa, his mouth full of the cereal he is eating. He is wearing the most shit eating grin you have ever seen on him.

“Jungkook?! What the fuck?” You spit out, totally fucking shocked. Like, obviously.

“Hey man…” Nick breathes out heavily, trying to speak properly, “I thought you would be at Vanessa’s tonight?”

“Nah,” Jungkook smiles, “Dropped her off and came home.”

HOME?

“H-Home?” You look between the two guys, what the fuck does he mean by that. This is Nicks place, right?

“Oh you didn’t know?” Jungkook nods his head toward Nick, “Nick here is my beloved roommate.”

“What the fuck…” you mutter under your breath, trying to understand the mother fucking situation. Were you about to fuck Jungkook’s roommate? Are you still going to is the real question?

“Wait, how do you two even know each other?” Nick starts to look antsy, “Don’t tell me she’s one of the girls you’ve fucked…come on bro, leave some for the rest of us.” He chuckles somewhat bitterly.

“No!” you’re quick to say. You begin smoothing out your skirt, then your hair. “We just…”

“y/n is my bestie!” Jungkook grins, putting the cereal down and standing up. He walks forward until he is making a triangle with you and Nick.

“Was.” You spit out harshly, crossing your arms across your chest. Nick just stands there confused as hell, looking between the two of you.

“Anyway, I should get going.” You turn your body to Nick, a look of apology on your face.

“What? We can just go to my room?” he slurs, tugging on his pants uncomfortably, his boner still apparent.

“Sorry, no longer in the mood.”

You pull out your phone to order an Uber when Jungkook takes your phone from you.

“I’m not drunk, I can drive you.” He offers. You push your head back in disbelief, how does Jungkook have the AUDACITY to offer that to you?

“Why the fuck would I want that?”

“So we can…” His eyes slide over to the ever growing confused Nick, “Talk.”

You haven’t spoken to Jungkook in 3 months and today is finally the day you are able to breathe a little easier and he just has to barge back in.

“Like I said,” You snatch your phone back from him, “Why the fuck would I want that?”

Nick shifts around uncomfortably, his eyes darting from you to Jungkook.

“Well, I am gonna head to my room…uh, bye y/n…it was nice meeting you…I guess…”

You and Jungkook both turn your heads toward Nick at the same time, eyes shooting daggers at him.

“Yeah, bye.” Jungkook dismisses his roommate, his jaw clenching.

“Nice to meet you too…”

Nick walks backward until his back meets his bedroom room, he looks at the two of you one last time before turning around to disappear into his room.

“I said, let me drive you home.”

“And I said, why the fuck would I want that?”

“y/n don’t choose now to be difficult.” Jungkook takes a step closer to you, his hands running through his dark, messy hair. His eyes shut in frustration, “I just want to talk to you.”

“And I don’t want to talk to you.” You take a step back, “Plus, how would your girlfriend feel if you took me home?”

Jungkook’s eyes narrow, his mouth setting in a firm line.

“She’s not my girlfriend.”

“Could of fooled me and like, everyone else.” You scoff.

Jungkook bites down on his bottom lip, not knowing what to say. While she’s not his girlfriend she’s also not not his girlfriend. It’s complicated.

“Can I please, just please, can I take you home?”

“No, Jungkook. The fucking audacity,” you scoff again, “You haven’t spoken to me in 3 months,” your voice fucking cracks and you feel like dying. “Don’t start now.”

“y/n…” he runs another frustrated hand down his tired face, “I didn’t mean for it to go this long…” “I don’t fucking care, Jungkook.”

You feel your chest begin to burn, and your eyes begin to gloss over but you won’t cry. You won’t give him the satisfaction.

“I want nothing to do with you.”

You stare at the phone in your hands as you begin ordering your Uber when he yanks it from your hands once again, he hides the phone in his back pocket and you snarl.

“What the hell Jeon?”

“I said I am driving you home so we can talk so that’s what we are gonna fucking do, okay?” he grabs your hand and begins walking you towards the front door. There’s something about Jungkook...you decide to listen. You watch silently as he puts on his shoes and grabs his wallet and keys.

“Okay…” you finally answer, your voice timid.

He said you guys are going to talk but the car ride has been mostly silent save the low radio playing in the background. Maybe it’s better this way, you think. You aren’t sober, that’s for sure but you also don’t think you are drunk enough to handle this properly. You decide maybe that’s also for the best.

“You sir, are a fucking asshole.” You speak up, your fingers playing with the zipper of your purse. The car smells like it always does, his fresh laundry car freshener and you get sucked into a million memories linked with this scent.

“I know.” Jungkook eyes you from the driver seat, you shiver from the running AC and so he turns it down, “There’s a blanket in the back if you want to grab it.”

“No thanks, don’t know where that’s been.”

“It’s clean, I promise.”

Your eyes go wide as you recall his last promise to you…”Just a few days. I promise.”

“Yeah, I don’t actually believe in your promises anymore.” You continue to pick at the zipper of your purse, your eyes never leaving the zig and zag of the material.

“I needed space y/n, fucking sue me.” He groans out, his fingers gripping the steering wheel tightly.

“Oh I wish I could.” You snap back.

You feel your chest burn and tighten again, your eyes slightly watering. You have to force them shut to keep from any tears growing.

“I called and texted you every day.” You whisper, his grip getting tighter on the steering wheel.

“I gave you a few days Jungkook. But I never heard from you until 11 at night one night telling me you are fucking moving out.”

“I know, that was…fucked up, I admit. But I had to do what I had to do and I just wish you would let me explain that—”

“No.” you cut him off, “You don’t deserve to explain anything.”

“You mean so much to me y/n…”

“Don’t.”

Jungkook pulls over on the side of the road, turning off the ignition.

“What are you doing?” you sputter out.

He clicks his seatbelt off his body and turns to face you, “Getting comfortable.”

“Why?”

“Will you look at me?” Jungkook tilts his head towards you, “Will you please look at me?”

“No.” you stay facing forward, your hands folded in your lap.

“y/n…please.” His voice sounds strained and you almost feel bad. Almost, but not quite.

You don’t need this…you don’t need him. Ouch, you feel pain in your chest as you think that…oh, the lies you tell yourself.

“Say what you need to say Jungkook, so you can take me home.” Your face stays neutral.

Jungkook sighs out, feeling almost defeated, but not quite.

“I…I am so sorry.” He finally says.

“About what?”

“Everything y/n.” his voice cracks and somehow you feel satisfied.

“You’ll have to be more specific if you ever want my acceptance”

“I know…the first thing I am sorry for is not telling you about Taehyung. That was…that was wrong of me—”

“No shit, but go on.” Your voice stays steady as you speak.

“I was worried about other shit, I was selfish and it’s taking me a long time to forgive myself…but I’ve thought a lot about it these last few months and—and…”

“Oh? You’re worried about you forgiving yourself? Shouldn’t you be a little more concerned about I don’t know, me?”

Jungkook frowns at your words, because well, you’re right. And he’s getting to that part but you keep interrupting him. But he lets you.

“Yes. I am most worried about you, of course.” He breathes out. “You have no idea what these 3 months without you have felt like…”

“Really Jungkook? If anyone knows its fucking me. I went 3 months without you too. You left me!” you start to lose your composure as you speak, your hands gripping on to your poor purse. “When I was going through a really hard time you straight up left me.” You whisper.

“Please believe me…I had my reasons. It was truly for the best y/n.”

“For the best?” you scoff. “You’re such an asshole.”

Jungkook winces at your words, he knows you mean them and that hurts him even more.

“Can you just trust me?” Jungkook blurts out.

Huh? You shake your head, disappointed he would say something so …well, ridiculous.

“Just stop, Jungkook.” You hesitantly roll your eyes, still shaking your head.

Jungkook licks his lips over and over, trying to figure out his next words.

“I really really,” he begins to lose it, his eyes darting all around the car. “just need you to trust me.” He blinks repeatedly, his eyes not focusing on anything in particular.

You, of course, do not believe your ears. Trust him? How could you possibly trust him?

“I just really…I really had my reasons y/n. And I’m sorry, but I just need you to just trust me, that I had my reasons and that I do care about you.” His voice is shaky and you’re uncertain how to take this information.

“I’m confused…” you begin, you tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “You want me to trust you? Even after you left me? Even after I ‘threw myself’ at you?!”

“You weren’t in the right head space y/n…you were vulnerable and…and you didn’t actually want me. You just were feeling used and rejected and needed something to make you feel wanted. To feel better. You wanted to use me for that and I couldn’t let you. But how much could I handle? You liked one of my friends, dated him…sort of, even slept with him and I had to be your shoulder to cry on when,” his breathing picks up heavily as he tries to speak, “it doesn’t matter.” He grits out.

You sit there…speechless. He wasn’t wrong, was he? You were feeling lost and rejected and used and you just wanted something or someone to feel better and who better than your best friend? But it’s also his fault you needed things to work out with Taehyung in the first place!

“Jungkook—”

“I’m not done.” He breathes out, his hot breath reaching your skin.

“I needed some space to think. But I realized I couldn’t properly think things through if I saw you every day, so yeah, I moved out. I’m sorry…” He runs a hand through his hair, a light chuckle makes it way past his lips “Then I met Vanessa.”

“I don’t want to talk about your little girlfriend.” You turn to face forward in your seat, your eyes glancing at the stop sign ahead.

“I told you, she’s not my girlfriend. But it is complicated.”

You continue to look straight ahead, your heart racing in your chest. The subject of “Vanessa” making you feel anxious.

“Complicated how?” you gulp.

“Don’t worry about it.” He laughs to himself, you turn your head to look at him.

“Are you serious, Jungkook?”

“We fuck y/n.”

“But it’s more than that right?”

“Yeah…” Jungkook bites down on his lip.

You look at him bewildered.

“Do you like her? Love her?”

You grip your purse in your lap, waiting for his answer. How would you feel if he answers yes? Are you brave enough to endure that answer? And if he says no? should you be happy? Should you feel relieved?

“No.” he closes his eyes, he folds his hands in front of him. “It’s complicated.”

You sign in relief—oh. Relief is the emotion you are feeling. Why? Why should it matter?

“Why are you telling me all of this?” you whisper.

“I want to be friends again, y/n.” he says softly, his eyes searching yours.

This is madness, how the hell could you save this friendship? Your face scrunches up and the first couple of tears slide down your cheeks, you shake your head as they continue to fall.

“You don’t know how this makes me feel…” you cry out. “I don’t even know how it makes me feel.”

You miss him, so fucking much and he’s right here offering himself to you. But you ‘re so hurt.

“y/n…I know I hurt you. But you gotta believe me when I say it is the hardest thing I have had to do…you understand that right? I had to do it…you understand right?” he begs.

“You were so quick to abandon me, Jungkook.” You drop your head into your hands, the tears uncontrollable now.

“I…” Jungkook begins to panic, his own eyes glossing over. “Fuck, I’m so sorry. Please y/n…I can make it up to you.”

“Things would never be the same, you get that right?” you bawl into your lap, your words coming out broken.

“Please baby, I just need you in my life again…” Jungkook admits, his own words choppy. He reaches his hand to touch you, to his surprise you don’t flinch. His hand cups the back of your head and he begins to massage it softly.

“I have missed you so much and nothing I mean nothing can replace you.” He hesitates to continue, “trust me…I have tried.”

You sob into your hands harder, the weight of his words crushing you.

“I’m sorry Jungkook but I…I don’t believe you.”

Jungkook’s eyes widen as he absorbs your words, his mouth falls open in shock. Don’t believe him?

“What—what do you mean? What are you saying?” his panic filled voice makes your stomach churn.

“I reject your offer. Now please take me home.” You lift your head and stare straight ahead. “I’m serious.”

Jungkook face twists into a bewildered expression, he doesn’t believe his ears. You…reject him?

“Wait—”

“I said take me home now.” This time you snap your face in his direction, the cold look in your eyes piercing his very soul.

“Okay.”

Hopeless: the dictionary describes it as without hope ; despairing. But in reality, it’s just a picture of Jungkook’s poor, poor face.

Jungkook parks in his designated spot in the lot of his apartment complex, he reverses in because why the hell not. So extra. His drive home was silent… not even the radio on a low volume keeping him company, just complete silence. He turns the car off but doesn’t make a move to get out, he just continues to sit here in his car and sigh out dramatically every 5 seconds.

He’s so confused and lost on what to do. He bangs his head against the steering wheel a few times just for the hell of it, he just…he didn’t think you would reject him. But honestly? Can he blame you? All he’s done lately is be selfish and mess up over and over again. But he wishes you could just trust him but he also wishes he could just tell you the truth. Maybe then you could understand his position and you wouldn’t be mad at him anymore. But he has to wait.

Jungkook’s head is still banging against the steering wheel when more thoughts of you bombard his mind. His breathing picks up and he starts to sniffle, he doesn’t want to cry but you just…you don’t want anything to do with him. He balls his hands into fists and hit the steering wheel over and over causing the horn to go off a few times but he doesn’t care he’s so upset, he just….

When Jungkook saw you tonight for the first time in 3 months he swears his heart actually stopped. He swears it raced so quickly that it just stopped. He let go of Vanessa’s hand so quickly because he wanted to rush to you and hug you close, he wanted to just feel you. Not having touched your skin for the last 3 months…he doesn’t want to imagine even another day.

A few tears slip past his closed lids, he chuckles darkly as he recalls you and Nick. He thought, wow, the universe is cruel and also hilarious. His fucking roommate? He shakes his head, laughing again but his lips remain downward. He feels so fucking helpless right now. But he deserves this, he deserves to feel this pain. He did this to himself and he’s fully aware of that.

Jungkook thinks of your face, he thinks of your smile, he thinks of your eyes and he cries harder, his tears landing on the steering wheel and sliding down landing on to his lap. Yes, he feels like all hope is lost but he knows he cannot give up. He will win you over again one day. He lifts his head and wipes his tear streaked cheeks with the back of his hand and breathes out steadily.

“y/n…” he whispers to himself. Your name leaves his mouth in frustration. He won’t give up. He can’t.

~~~~

“And they were roommates?!” Jimin shouts, a banana half sticking out of his mouth, Trina gasps and whispers “Oh my god they were roommates.”

“Yeah, it was a total shit show.” You bang your head against your breakfast table. Holly rubs your back as she sits next to you.

“Then what happened?” she pries further.

“Yeah what the hell happened y/n!” Jimin yells out.

“He asked to be friends again…and I totally rejected him. Maybe I was too harsh? He was so sad guys…it makes me think…I might agree to kind of being…friends?”

Jimin shuts his eyes as a frown decorates his face, he places a hand on his hip and he inhales a sharp breath, “Listen…you’re both my friends and of course I want you to be good again…but he hurt you …bad.”

“I know Jiminie, but his reasons…” you bite your lip, “Never mind.”

“Well, I don’t like it.” Trina butts in. “He fucking left you, remember?”

“Yes Trina, I fucking remember—”

“Then fucking act like it!”

“Trina relax,” Holly intervenes. “They have a long history, right? It’s hard to just forget about everything…”

Jimin stands from his chair, hands on both hips. “Fine, if we are doing this…then you better actually try. Don’t half ass shit, if you’re going to be friends then don’t be an asshole to him, don’t make snarky remarks…I know your ass.”

Jimin has a good point, you haven’t actually thought about how you will act.

“I’ll be a good girl.” You raise your right arm to salute him.

“Fucking smart ass.” He rolls his eyes.

“Are we serious right now?” Trina shakes her head, “You moped around for 3 fucking months y/n. You cried every time you even thought of Jungkook…which was a fucking lot.” She points out, “Listen, you stayed strong when you talked to him in the car. Don’t break just because you feel bad for the dude because he’s fucking pitiful. He doesn’t deserve your pity girl. He’s an asshole!”

“Trina, be nice.” Holly says sternly, reaching forward to grab on to Trina’s hand. Trina visibly relaxes and nods her head towards Holly and smiles softly.

You and Jimin share a look. Are they….?

“You…” You slam your eyes shut, Trina’s words ringing loudly in your ears. You know she’s right. “I’ll think about it some more. For now, I gotta get ready for work.”

~~~~

“Doesn’t Hazel look so pretty here?” Adam shoves his phone in your face as he gushes about his girlfriend.

“Yes dude, she’s so pretty.” You deadpan. “Now can you please put the brownies in the oven? We’re low.”

“Wait wait…here’s one of us together at the park.” He nudges his phone in your hands, you roll your eyes but you take it.

The two of them are sitting on a park bench, she’s leaning into his frame and they both have wide smiles on their faces. They seem so in love. And you know they are because fucking Adam reminds you every 20 seconds.

“Their love makes me sick.” Jade walks over, her hands patting down on her work apron, her tone is bland but she still tries to smile. “Like, we get it.”

“Who loves who more?” you begin with a toothy grin, “Adam to Hazel or Lenny to the sugar cookies?” you laugh while pointing at said Lenny stuffing his face with the reject cookies. Jade and Adam chuckle while they stare at him.

“Hey guys, really?” Lenny says with his mouth full. “You know I feel bad when we throw them away.” He pouts, crumbs decorating his lips.

“Lenny I catch you eating fresh ones all the time!” Adam points out.

“Sometimes they’re a little ugly…” Lenny reasons, “So I…”

“You don’t have to explain my guy, you just really love your cookies.” You hand Adam back his phone as you head towards the walk in freezer to take out the brownies yourself. You load up a tray and stick those suckers in the oven.

“You’re useless Adam.” Jade sticks a piece of gum in her mouth and chews obnoxiously “U-s-e-l-e-s-s. Useless.”

“You’re always so mean to me Jade what did I ever do to you?”

All 4 of you shoot your heads up when you hear the bell go off on the door of the bakery, its loud chime signaling the arrival of a customer.

“Oh.” Jade says while popping a bubble. “It’s your usual customer y/n.”

You tilt your head towards the front of the store to get a look at who she is talking about, and yup its him. Your most consistent customer who orders the same damn thing every single day. 2 oatmeal raisin cookies and that’s it.

“Can someone else just take care of him today?” you whine, “I’m not in the mood to argue.”

“You know he’s just going to ask for you…” Lenny says stuffing his face with another cookie.

“God damn it.” You huff out, you grab two gloves from the box on the counter and begin walking towards the front of the store.

You reach the front counter and take in your enemy—you mean, your customer.

“And what do I owe the pleasure Mister Oatmeal Raisin?” you raise a brow towards the man. He’s only a few inches taller than you, his hair is a sandy color today and you hate to admit it looks good on him.

“You know you could just call me by name.” the man sways side to side with a smirk on his face.

“I like Mister Oatmeal Raisin.”

He has been coming to this store for the last couple of months and you two…don’t necessarily get along swimmingly. He complains a lot and is a total smart ass. And you? Well, you’re not much better.

“Well, I’ll have my usual.” He smiles, “And you know the drill, please make sure there is a normal amount of raisins and not a million, I don’t want 8 raisins a bite. But one every now and then.”

You roll your eyes extremely dramatically, pressing the buttons on the screen for his order.

“Sir yes sir.” You salute towards him, “How could I not know the drill?”

“That’s the spirit.”

You spin on your heels and head towards the back to heat up his two cookies. You carefully select one cookie with barely any raisins and one cookie with a million, just like he didn’t want. You cackle to yourself as you place them in the baggy, feeling beyond satisfied.

“How haven’t you gotten fired?” Adam crosses his arms over his chest as he watches you, “And how hasn’t he complained about you? You do this every time I don’t get it.”

“He likes her.” Jade says plainly while scrolling through her phone.

“As fucking if!” you scoff, “He wants nothing but to annoy me!” But you can’t help but smile.

“He literally only asks for you every time you’re in.” Lenny reasons, “but you shouldn’t like him back…he likes the worst cookie on the menu. Sugar is where it’s at.”

You laugh at your coworker while walking back up towards the front of the store, reaching the counter.

“Your cookies!” you hand him the baggy with an evil smirk, “I hope you enjoy them.” You wink.

The man opens the baggy and inspects each cookie and with his own evil smirk he winks back at you, “Are we serious right now?” his sly smile doesn’t leave his face as he begins to complain, “You are such a brat.”

“$4 Mister Oatmeal Raisin.”

He hands you the cash, you put it away quickly and with a wide smile you gesture towards the door for him to leave.

“Min Yoongi.” He shakes the bag of cookies in front of him, “Not Mister Oatmeal Raisin.” He turns around and starts walking towards the door but before he exits he tilts his head to look at you one last time, “See you tomorrow…y/n.”

You feel a harsh blush creep up on your cheeks, or your whole face actually. Maybe your whole body. You feel taken aback he knows your name but then you remember you have a god damn name tag.

“Uh…yeah.”

“See you tomorrow…y/n.” all 3 of your coworkers mock in a deep voice.

“Shut up guys!” you whine into your hands, “Can we please just get back to work!”

~~~~~

A few weeks later

The drive to Jimin’s is a quick 7 minutes but you did take a little detour. You decided to stop at the pizzeria that’s on the way and grab a hot pizza for the two of you.

“Hehe.” You look over to the steamy food sitting in the passenger seat.

Jimin has been such a great friend to you all this time and you feel like you’ve never really thanked him…so, tonight you two are going to have a fun night in—he just doesn’t know it yet.

Who doesn’t love being surprised with food?

You pull up to Jimin’s apartment complex and after driving in circles you finally find a parking spot. You grab your purse, your backpack, and the pizza and make your way up to his apartment.

You knock on his front door a few times but get no answer. Maybe he’s not home? No, you definitely hear music coming from the other side…so, you decide to call him.

“Hello?”

“Jimin~ let me in!” you sing into the phone.

“You’re—you’re here?”

“Let me in already!” and with that you hang up and wait patiently outside the door.

A few moments pass before the door is opening up, when Jimin really registers that it’s you he’s kind of closing the door until only his face is shown through the crack.

“Ummm…yes?”

You quirk a brow at the boy, “What do you mean ‘yes?’ let me in!” you begin walking forward when a panicked Jimin opens the door wider to let himself outside and shut the door behind him.

“y/n…why are you here? Did we have plans tonight?” he looks down at the pizza in your hands.

“Not exactly…” you admit, “But I figured we could have a night in.”

Jimin frowns. Fucking frowns!

“Or not?” you say awkwardly.

You hear some sort of banging on the other side of the door and then it clicks.

“Oh? You have someone over?” you smirk.

“Uhhh…no. Nothing like that.” Jimin’s eyes slide to the side as he tries to think of what to say next.

“Babe—”

“Jimin!”

The door is being swung wide open and your eyes travel from some horrendous toes socks to some tight jeans to a striped t shirt to yes, Jungkook’s surprised face.

“Oh.” You both say at the same time.

You and Jungkook stare at one another for a few moments, neither of your eyes leaving the other when Jimin clears his throat.

“Sorry y/n. Jungkook is already over…” he gives you an apologetic smile.

“Is it just you two?” you ask quietly.

“Huh? Uh, yeah.”

You glance down at the pizza and think to yourself. You and Jungkook may not be friends but you can be civil? Yeah, totally! You can definitely be civil! You already bought this fucking pizza so you and Jimin are going to eat it! And you guess, Jungkook too.

“Okay, let me in.” you start shoving your way past Jimin, you watch as his and Jungkook’s eyes go wide.

“Maybe you didn’t hear him, but I am already hanging out with him?” Jungkook sputters out. He awkwardly moves to the side anyway to let you through.

“I can be civil with you Jungkook. Plus, I don’t want this pizza to go to waste. So let’s eat.” You walk through, nudging the pizza box into Jungkook’s hands, he takes it while looking at Jimin with shocked eyes.

Jimin just shrugs and follows you inside.

“Yeah, let’s eat.” He says nonchalantly.

Jungkook is left at the door with the pizza in his hands as he is left completely dumbfounded. He is malfunctioning.

“Jungkook?” you call out over your shoulder, “Hurry up, I’m hungry!”

“Yeah, Jungkook hurry up!” Jimin smirks, he isn’t totally sure what’s going on but he kind of likes it.

“So what were you guys doing before I got here?” you shove an entire slice of pizza down your throat, the sauce getting left behind on your lips.

“I was teaching Jungkook some of my dance moves…we made a bet that he couldn’t learn the entire routine in 3 times…and—”

“Let me guess, he fucking learned it.” You laugh.

Jimin groans, his head thrown back as he begins nodding his head ‘yes.’

“So annoying! What can’t he do!” Jimin throws the pizza crust in the box and Jungkook immediately picks it up and eats it.

“Pshh, I could name a few things.” You point out bitterly. “But we won’t get into that.”

“Yeah, please don’t.” Jimin pleads.

“I’m curious…what is it you think I cant do?” Jungkook quirks a brow at you and your eyes darken in his direction.

“You really want me to?” you take a napkin and wipe your lips, “It’s nothing nice.” You admit.

“Oh then yes, please don’t.” Jungkook is quick to say.

“Yes, please don’t.” Jimin begs again.

The 3 of you are sitting on the living room floor, maybe only 30 minutes or so has passed by and it’s not too awkward. But it’s not necessarily comfortable either. Jimin looks between you and Jungkook constantly, waiting for someone to crack but neither of you really speak to each other. Both of you really only communicating with Jimin.

“So Jimin, are you going to show me another routine?”

“Why? So you can prove you’re the master of everything again? No thanks.”

“Jimin, maybe you can show me a few steps?”

Jimin smiles awkwardly while Jungkook is quick to burst out laughing. You snap your head towards Jungkook and raise your brows at him.

“Why is Jungkook laughing, Jimin?”

“Umm…” Jimin smiles softly, “You aren’t the most…”

Jungkook laughs harder as he watches Jimin trying to explain.

“Aren’t the most…?” You tilt your head towards the boy.

“C’mon y/n don’t make me say it…” Jimin drags out his words in a whine, he plays with his fingers, looking around the room awkwardly.

“Just say it Jimin.” Jungkook chuckles out.

“If you’re trying to say I’m a bad dancer, we all know that’s not true!” you defend once you catch on, you pout at the boys.

“Well…”

“You have both told me I am a good dancer!”

“Well, you know how to move. But steps…following a routine…that’s different. You aren’t very coordinated.” Jimin finally admits, a sheepish grin on his face.

“He means you can roll your hips but your feet are clumsy as fuck.” Jungkook says, still laughing at the situation.

“Shut up.” You glare at Jungkook.

“No, he’s right.” Jimin begins laughing as well, he looks at you and smiles. Well, if Jimin is saying it…maybe it might be true. It’s not like you didn’t kind of know. But still!

“Fine, whatever. Don’t teach me then.”

Suddenly, Jimin’s phone is going off and he rushes to the kitchen to answer it. You and Jungkook eat your pizza in silence, awkwardly catching one another’s gaze.

“So—”

“Don’t talk to me.” You cut in. Jimin isn’t here so it’s not like you have to be totally social with Jungkook.

“Oh.” Jungkook dramatically slumps his shoulders and pouts. You watch him as he throws a silent fit like the baby he is. “Okay.”

Jimin walks back into the living room looking annoyed, he stands between you two and throws a hand on his hip.

“I have to go down to the front office, there was a mix up in packages…I shouldn’t take too long…” he bites down on his plump bottom lip, “Please be civil while I’m gone. Jungkook…” he looks at the boy then at you, “y/n…” he warns.

“Sir yes sir!” you salute towards your friend with a straight face.

Jimin only narrows his eyes as he looks between you two.

“I’m serious…” he says.

Then he is putting on some shoes and heading out the front door, the soft click making you shudder. You’re alone with Jungkook.

A few minutes pass and you both awkwardly just sit there, sometimes catching the other looking. You finally huff out and accidentally giggle.

“What’s funny?” Jungkook’s curiosity getting the best of him.

“It’s just…I feel like we’re Jimin’s divorced parents and we’re trying to be civil for our child.”

Jungkook stares at you with scrunched brows, then looks away while a chuckle escapes his lips.

“Yeah. You’re right.”

You only nod your head in response. You two go back to the awkward silence.

You aren’t used to this…this awkward and odd silence that lingers between you two. It feels so fucking suffocating you almost wish you were on total talking terms so you didn’t have to endure this shit show.

“You know I could…no, forget it.” Jungkook bites his nails as he speaks, “I…”

“What?” you don’t mean to snap at him, but somehow even talking with an attitude feels better than not talking at all.

“I was going to say…I could teach you some steps…then you could surprise Jimin. He’s been working on a salsa piece…I can teach you some? Then maybe he will stop talking shit on your dancing.” Jungkook laughs awkwardly.

“Wait—he talks shit?!” somehow this doesn’t surprise you in the least.

“Only a little.” Jungkook shows you how little with his pointer finger and thumb. “But uh, want me to show you?”

“I don’t even want to talk to you, you think I want to dance with you?” you raise a brow in amusement. You forget this boy has all the audacity.

“Dancing doesn’t have to have any talking.” Jungkook states with a sly smile.

“So you’re just going to show me the steps?”

“Precisely.”

You don’t know why, but this sounds better than actually speaking and/or just sitting in miserable silence. And maybe, just maybe you have a desire to be close to him.

“You think I could learn in time before Jimin gets back?”

“With me as your teacher? Definitely.” He fucking smirks at you and you can’t help but feel that feeling in your stomach. Not necessarily a bad feeling but a fucking feeling.

Jungkook stands to his feet and extends his hand out to you for you to take.

“Here, stand up.”

Your eyes travel from his hands to his eyes and you blink lazily at him…wait, you’re really doing this? He stares down at you and he smiles softly and it creates a warmth in your chest that you’re trying so hard to ignore. You can’t.

Even so, you hesitantly begin to reach up to grab on to his hand, once your skin touches his you feel it. The burning. You should be used to it but right now, the fire is raging and the heat is almost too much. But you let him close his hand over yours as he helps you up.

You’re now standing in front of one another, in complete silence again. But this time it’s not awkward—no, it’s a different type of tension. Your hand lingers in his, neither of you brave enough to let go of the other. Jungkook looks down at you and you up at him, and you feel a million things. But the number one thing you feel is pain. You slowly pull your hand back and break eye contact with him, your head dropping low.

“Show me already.” You whisper.

“Shh, no talking.” Jungkook quietly demands. “Only speak with your body.” He puts some music on the speakers and smirks at you.

Jungkook steps closer to you and you stay grounded in your spot, you can feel the heat of his body begin to radiate and warm you. One of his hands find yours, he weaves his fingers through your own and puts one hand on your hip, he looks down at you to warn you this is how he will guide you.

“Just follow me.”

“You said no talking Mr.Jeon.” you say almost under your breath as you stare into his eyes. Jungkook rolls his head back with a smirk on his face, he looks at you and nods.

He puts his left foot forward and steps with his right foot in the same place at center, then puts his left foot back again. You try to copy his moves but even with such simple steps you step on his feet. He looks up at you disapprovingly. You only smile at him.

You two continue to try these steps until you finally manage to understand them even just a little bit. Jungkook brings your body closer to his as you two move your hips to the music while following the simple steps. His chest flush against your own, his heart beating so loudly you can feel it. Your heart isn’t any better. You start to finally get the hang of it, the music slowly taking you to another place. Jungkook moves his hips to the beat so flawlessly and honestly? You’re doing pretty fucking good if you do say so yourself.

Jungkook’s grip on your hip tightens as he grinds himself closer to you, you feel lightheaded as you two dance to the song. Your breathing getting just a little heavier and you feel lost and pathetic but you’re too immersed in the dance to care. Jungkook finds his head falling into the crook of your neck, his hot breaths fanning against your sensitive skin and you find your hand skimming up his back until you have a handful of his hair. You lightly tug on his locks and Jungkook quietly groans. You don’t know if you’re even doing the right steps anymore, your feet moving all around the place, but somehow it’s working. You’re still following his lead and you’re sure the dance looks somewhat okay. All you care about is how both of your hips move to the beat of the music and into each other. You two are so in sync its driving you nuts.

Jungkook lifts his head and watches as you close your eyes and he closes his own eyes, his head falling forward, your foreheads close to touching. You feel so dizzy, so light and airy, so fucking great like you’re floating. You can’t help but feel the heat creep up your entire body, you feel sweat start to build as you two move. You tighten your hands around Jungkook’s neck and pull him down impossibly close, until his forehead is touching yours. Your harsh breaths mingling with his. You get dragged into the memory of when he had you pinned to his dorms mattress, you recall how his lips left kisses all along your throat, his hot breath reminding you of the past. You think of how he rolled his hips into you effortlessly then as well, you think of how you scraped your nails down his back as he thrusted into you. God, you need to think of something else but Jungkook is filling your mind.

Jungkook’s breathing picks up again, as does yours. Your memories making this dance that much more sensual. You remember the way Jungkook nibbled on your ear as he let filthy words spill from his mouth when he fucked you. God, you should not be thinking this but his body feels so good. God, you should think of anything…literally anything else. You remember how he held you close much like how he is right now. You two continue dancing to the song that is soon coming to an end. You know exactly how it feels to have Jungkook inside you, moving and stilling. You know exactly what it feels like to come all around his cock. God, you need to stop. You need to slow your breathing. God, you…you…you...he continues to guide you along to the music when you feel something hard poke against you. Oh. Oh. OH. Hard. He’s hard.

Immediately, you pull back and take several clumsy steps backward. You blink at him with wide eyes when you realize that maybe he was recalling the same memories as you. Your wide eyes concerning Jungkook.

“Okay, that’s enough lessons for today.” Your harsh breaths don’t go unnoticed by Jungkook, his own breathing quite unsteady.

“Right.” Jungkook mumbles.

You two stand around for a few moments, just taking in the experience you just shared.

You still feel…how do you feel? You just shared a hot dance with your best friend? Wait—ex best friend? You don’t know. The memory of his body moving with yours, his skin touching your skin, his breaths on your neck, his hair balled up in your hands. God, it felt so good.

But so wrong.

“Umm…thanks.” You finally say.

Jungkook perks up at the gratitude, even if it’s somewhat forced. His frown turns into a small smile and you can’t help but smile back.

“I miss you y/n.” Jungkook instantly regrets it by the look on your face. Your expression turning hard. “Sorry I—”

“No, I miss you too.” You answer honestly. “But this doesn’t change anything.”

“But why not? Do you really not want me in your life for like, ever?”

Jungkook’s questions settle deep within you. The depth they hold…it’s too much. You wonder? Is this anti-Jungkook thing permanent? Or are you just trying to teach him a lesson?

Jungkook rubs his temples as he thinks, he sighs out instead of talking more.

“Not forever.” You finally say. Jungkook looks at you, a sliver of hope flashes across his face.

“But when?” he asks softly.

Yeah y/n. When? You know you both can’t go back to how things use to be but maybe starting over? God, you don’t know what to do! You know someone like Trina will be disappointed you became friends with Jungkook again so quickly, but you know someone like Jimin would be happy his two friends are back to being on okay terms. Why are you trying to please everybody? What do you want?

“Will you ever give up?” you say a little more lightly.

“No…” he says under his breath, his eyes focusing on the TV. “Not until you agree to be my friend again.”

You look at Jungkook with disbelief written all over your face, this boy has the fucking audacity once again. You’re amused though.

“Excuse me?” you say, cleaning your ear out with your point finger. “I didn’t catch that.”

Jungkook looks into your eyes, his eyes are large and doe like and it brings you back to every moment ever that he has given you this look.

“You’re stuck with me until you love me again.” He says more firmly.

“Who said,” you look at him with soft eyes, “That I ever stopped loving you?”

Jungkook smiles, he fucking smiles. His adorable bunny smile that makes your heart race.

“You still love me?”

“Only a little.” You jut your lip out, “I mostly hate you.”

Jungkook only frowns for a second before he is smiling again, “That’s fair.”

The two of you stand in comfortable silence for a few minutes, you sway back and forth wondering what you want to say to him—you miss him, of course but…

“Let’s take it slow.” You finally break the silence. You miss him more than anything and it might be worth it to have him in your life again, “You aren’t going to be a priority in my life anymore.” You crack you knuckles, the sound filling up the room.

“I know,” Jungkook feels his heart twist at your words but at least it’s something. “We can go however slow you want y/n.”

“You are on—”

“Thin fucking ice, buddy. I know.”

You exhale a shaky breath, thinking about how to go about this, “We can text every now and then, I’m not sure I want to hang out with you quite yet.”

“Okay.”

“Maybe a group hang out first…”

“I’d like that.”

Jungkook reaches over to grab your hand but you pull back, “That’s a no from me for the affection.”

Hurt flashes across Jungkook’s features but he softens up as he nods his head. “Noted.”

You wonder if you’re making the right decision. This wasn’t easy, you know? This actually felt quite hard. But somehow you feel like some weight has been lifted off your shoulders, like things maybe just maybe will be okay.

“I won’t push myself on you, I promise.” Jungkook sits back down on the floor, crossing his legs.

“Just be yourself, Jungkook.”

“If I wanted to be myself I would be hugging you right now but that’s apparently off limits.” He jokes.

“One hug.” You open your arms timidly. You feel one hug can’t be too bad?

Jungkook widens his eyes in pleasant surprise. He stands to his feet again and opens his own arms.

“C’mere.”

You watch in disbelief as he grins with his arms wide open, expecting you to go to him! And you do. You fucking do.

His arms wrap around you, he pushes you into his chest and you feel so fucking good. So warm, so cozy. His scent making you feel dizzy again, his warmth causing you to heat up. You lean back and look at his content face, he honestly looks so fucking content. Like, this hug is everything to him. And maybe it is, but you don’t know that.

“Uh, am I interrupting something?” you both snap your heads toward the front door to see Jimin standing there with a package in his hands.

“I can come back later?” he smirks at you two.

“No no no no!” you drop your arms from hugging Jungkook and take a few steps back, “We were just—”

“We made up, Jimin.” Jungkook says calmly with the softest smile you’ve ever seen on him.

“We’re taking it slow!” you rush to say.

“Oh?” Jimin winks, he walks forward until he’s in the living room joining you two. “Does this mean you will be joining us this Thursday at Jungkook and Nick’s place?”

“Huh?”

Jungkook shifts on his feet, “Yeah, uh, me and Nick are having a small get together on Thursday…you can bring whoever you want…but you’re definitely invited.”

“Before I answer that…Jimin how did you not know about Nick and him being Jungkook’s roommate?”

“Listen! Jungkook is always HERE! I never go over there! The few times I was there Nick was never home okay?!” Jimin whines obnoxiously.

“Okay, whatever. And Jungkook, I said—”

“You said group hang outs.” Jungkook pouts.

Oh. You did say that. But this soon? And is she going to be there?

You chew on your lips before answering, “Okay. But I’m bringing Trina and Holly.”

“Oh bro, Trina is not your biggest fan.” Jimin cuts in.

“Yeah, I know how she is I already anticipated that.” Jungkook shrugs, he looks at you with a small smile.

Okay, starting over? Taking it slow? Can you and Jungkook do this? You look between the boys and smile,

“Okay. See you boys on Thursday.”

[semischarmed]

Temptation

-Wednesday- 

I love him so much. God I love him. And he’ll never know. Maybe it was a curse from a past life or something. To live like this, tantalizingly close to him but unable to act. I knew he didn’t see me that way, but that didn’t help any in my situation. 

Take today for instance, he just came back from the gym today soaked in the lingering smell of sweat. It was probably residual perspiration on the clothes he was carrying back or some other thing in his bag. Still. The smell. Goddamn. I could have died and gone to heaven on the spot. I tried to sneak a whiff of Connor, but all I could pick up was whatever soap and cologne he used. It was earthy, woodsy. Like cut cedar and fresh rain. It’s the Connor I always smelled, since he did always keep himself quite clean, and it’s a wonderful scent in its own right, forming the basis of my idea of Connor and the scent I associated with him. But damn. This paled in comparison to the hints of musk and workout sweat I could glean from his clothing. He reeked of pure man and it’s such a shame he covered that up. God I hope he doesn’t do laundry anytime soon.

He must have picked up on something, cause not a moment later I got a “Oh dude! I’m so sorry, this stuff probably reeks haha. I’ll get it washed up so it doesn’t stink up the place” he laughed politely. Fuck.

“Sure, you do you” I stated back, mentally cursing at his propensity for cleanliness.

You’d think the ROTC guys wouldn’t give two fucks about their smell but I guess Connor was an exception. Then again I don’t really know what they did, so maybe it was normal for them. In any case, he definitely did laundry tonight, and I definitely lost out on a good jack off.

-Friday-

So, weird thing happened last night. Connor looked tired as fuck, but he went out. The man must have been running on sheer willpower alone cause he had some kind of training day earlier today too. He collapsed in his room at like 8. Yet there he was an hour later- eyes bloodshot, hair tousled. Maybe he wanted to let loose or something? Still pretty weird. I mean, the guy was practically a saint. It’s odd enough that he went out for drinks, but even odder that he went out dressed like he did. Still I could definitely get used to a more experimental Connor. 

He was also a little looser when he came back. Gave me a pat on the shoulder and a wink. Something about “keeping the room safe” or something. I couldn’t concentrate enough to tell what he was actually rambling about. His breath was drenched in alcohol. I feel like I almost got drunk off the fumes alone when he spoke. No surprise when he had no recollection of any of it after he woke up from his nap. 

Total guilty pleasure, but the messy look was kind of hot on him. Never seen my friend so disheveled like this, he was always so prim and proper. It’s kind of nice to see him knocked down a few pegs. 

-Tuesday-

Connor let out a cute yawn before scratching his pits. He gave his scratching hand a quick sniff before settling into a satisfied smile. My dick jumped a little. I feigned ignorance when he regarded me, asking me if I saw that. “I… uh…no. Definitely not.” 

“Sure dude.” Now fully aware of my stare, Connor continued scratching at himself. “You’re seeing this now though, right?” He ran a hand over his stomach, gently feeling through his defined abs. I kept replaying the event in my head, drooling the delight I just witnessed and at a little daydream of me coming up to to feel this new side of Connor with him. In my daze, I barely noticed my roommate inching closer.

Plus, did he seem… bigger? Though I can’t say I’ve ever seen the guy without a shirt on so I guess I just never noticed. Regardless, this version of Connor was fucking hot. Looks like he’s got a tat too. Hot. 

“Baby if you’re gonna keep looking, you might as well have a taste.” He laughed warmly. I couldn’t believe what I just heard. In my stunned state, I couldn’t do anything beyond stare at him in disbelief as a vascular hand that seemed larger than it should be guided mine around his perky ass. God what a nice ass. I still recoiled out of the sheer absurdity in the situation. Try as I might, I couldn’t wrap my brain around the idea of this Connor. It’s like he was two different people. Well, I definitely liked this version of my friend more. I’m still drooling over what just happened.

“Another time, then,” he chuckled before walking to his room. 

Weird. Connor never really shut his door other than to sleep. Guess he was tired or something. 

-Thursday-

Well shit, I totally misread all of that. Today, I thought I saw that same glint of intrigue in his eyes and decided to risk it. Conner was just sitting in his boxers eating cereal and I was just standing there, a few feet behind. I couldn’t help it. My hand instinctively reached out and the cupped the outline of his ass. Perky. It was cute and compact and plump but definitely had a bit of muscle behind it. I regretted the action immediately. 

“…The fuck dude?” He gently whispered. It was more bewilderment than anything. Fuck. He was incredulous and I couldn’t blame him. Anger raged inside him, I could tell. But neither of us knew what to do in the situation. We stood there, staring at each other for what felt like hours before I relented.

In shame I could barely stammer out a shameful “s-sorry” before I slunk back to my room, bright red. 

I fucked up.

-Monday-

Okay. Scratch everything I just said. Connor is fucking with me. He’s got to be. He strode around the apartment half naked, humming a quiet tune to himself. Sure. Fine, I guess. Whatever. But as soon as he noticed me on the couch working on an essay, he walked over and gave me a hug from behind. Oh my god that hug. Connor was a lean dude, but I swear his muscles were fucking bulging, like they were barely contained in his skin. He wrapped those thick pythons over my shoulders and chest and I just about melted on the spot. I’m pretty sure I moaned a little too. Who wouldn’t? Wrapped in his warm embrace, surrounded by this man- I was his for that moment. I tensed up on the spot. I knew he didn’t swing that way, so I don’t know what he was trying but there was no way I would fall for what I could only assume was some kind of trap. 

He spoke in a tone laced in sex. It set me off in a way I didn’t expect. This was a side of Connor I’ve never seen, a tone of Connor I’ve never heard- an experience of Connor I’ve never had. It was a Connor I never knew I needed.

“I’ve seen the way you look at this body. You’re not very subtle.” In the faintest of whispers, he leaned in until his lips were barely touching my ear. My dick was already rock hard in anticipation- I was practically bursting at the seams and I’m sure he had a great view of it. “Just say the word and ‘Connor’ is yours”. 

With a control and a willpower I never had before, I refrained from kissing this boy- from putting myself all over him on the spot. I mentally cursed at my friend. ‘What the fuck are you playing at Connor?’ 

His hot, damp breath caressed my ear in its own embrace as I stood my ground, unmoving like stone. “Got to hand it to you, bro, you put up a really good fight. It’s okay. I love a good fight. Makes victory taste all the more sweeter.” The feel of Connor’s thick, defined fingers running through my hair and wet, slimy tongue across my cheek. He rolled his body forward, so the pulse through his abs would be felt across the back of my neck. From this spot, he was downright imposing. His guns went in for another caress- this time wrapping across my cheeks and around my chin.

“You know I love you bro… This body’s straight as an arrow. But it’s my body- I’ll go gay for you if you want”. What the fuck. Oh god I got a bit of his sweat on my cheek too. My eyes fluttered, body entrapped in a spell of my own hormones reacting to my friend’s advances.

Connor broke me. I shivered on the spot, leaned up to the man, moaned an “Oh fuck…Connor I-I need you. I-” before he cut me off. “Well bro, kind of looks like you still got some work today- you have fun with that.” He laughed coldly. He was fucking with me.

That whole exchange was really fucking weird, cause just a few hours later, it was back to pure awkward silence between us. Like a flip of a switch, the every energy he exuded around me could only be described as “uncomfortable”. I wanted to talk to him, to speak with him about earlier, to tell him I wanted him the same way. Something about those eyes read differently though. They read the same Connor I had been used to until recently. I decided to hold my tongue. Something about this situation wasn’t adding up.

Also I’m pretty sure this kid needs to see a doctor or something. I swear the guy doesn’t sleep- he’s out every night and then I see his tired ass drag himself to class every morning. Rushing a frat? Weird drugs? Could have been a host of things. 

-Tuesday-

Now 4 days since the incident last week. Thankfully he hasn’t brought it up- nor has he brought up whatever the fuck yesterday was. If it was even real. I sweat and stumble over my sentences in every conversation I make with him. I flash back to what he said to me. God, this was all too much. Every time I try to focus myself, focus on whatever he was talking to me about, I couldn’t help but think of the Connor that visited me yesterday night. 

Maybe, maybe it was just a hallucination. Maybe I dreamed it all up. I was working on an essay for hours. The whole encounter could have easily been a dream. He’s been going out every night too, so it’s not like he could have been speaking to me that coherently. Still. That didn’t make it any better. Whether or not he knew it, Connor was a demon in my life. 

I shamefully admit I totally jacked off to that little exchange from yesterday after he left. Grabbed some used Connor-scented garments off his hamper and exploded all over myself in a Connor-themed session. Nothing like the exquisite gym-soaked clothes from a week ago, but it was enough. It was still Connor. My eyes rolled up to the back of my head in pleasure as I took a breath, basking in the afterglow and the scent of forest and earth and faintest lingering musk of Connor in my nose. Connor was everything to me and, hallucination or not, I committed yesterday’s events to memory. 

-Still Tuesday-

Shitshitshit. Definitely not a dream. I caught the son of a bitch. In the dead of night, I caught him sneaking in from a dark corner of the room. Like a figure manifest from the shadows itself. He was holding some silver figurine in his hand, reciting some odd words, before he lunged at the sleeping Connor. He gave my roommate a quick sniff before scoffing. “Bro you have to stop cleaning all your nice smells away… With that the stranger pulled at the corners of Connor’s mouth. I watched as my roommate’s skin was forced to accommodate the man’s muscular calves. 

I watched as the stranger pulled Connor every further up himself. Damn, even in the dark I could tell the man was ripped. When his head finally slotted into where Connor’s skull would be, and Connor’s face was stretched being pulled, I saw the immediate change in my friend’s demeanor. This was the guy who’s been fucking with me recently. This was why Connor looked so buff lately. I couldn’t see the man who jumped inside my best friend, but I could never wipe that smug smile he wore through Connor’s face. 

The smell that originated from inside Connor, the same smell I experienced a week ago. God I loved that scent. It permeated throughout the room. Best friend concentrate. Like a humid, musky, grime that clung to the very air and decorated my nostrils. I never wanted his scent out of me again. I felt like I was inhaling Connor himself, regarding a newly discovered private part of my friend.

My stomach churned in a mix of anticipation and horror. Sweat beaded at my temples. Gotta admit, this was kind of hot. I had to figure out what I was gonna do about this. Self-preservation kicked in and I fled to my room, taking special attention to ensure I did not alert the man inside Connor. Not like he’d notice anyways- dude was feeling himself up almost immediately after he slipped inside. 

-Wednesday-

It’s like clockwork at this point. The “other” Connor came back early in the morning from a wild night out, before passing out on our couch as I was finally able to speak with my friend. Impossibly tired eyes looked back at me. He gave a weak grimace. “Must have passed out again….Uh.. can I help you man?” My heart sank. Could I really tell him this? My poor roommate. “No, uh.. do you want any breakfast?”.

I could tell he had meant to say yes. He motioned as much, before staring at my face and turning away. Fuck. He was definitely still put off by last week’s advance. I honestly don’t blame him. “N-no. I got it. Thanks.” 

I grimaced awkwardly before shrugging and walking to fix myself some breakfast. This would complicate things. And I couldn’t do that to Connor. I needed to find a way to fix this without him knowing. Evidently, his body being used and worn out like an evening jacket was taking its toll on him. Despite whatever we were going through, he was still my friend. And I couldn’t in good faith add more to that burden. 

“Hey, one of the guys from the gym’s coming over for dinner, that cool?” 

“Yeah man, I’ll just order some extra pizza,” I said back, sighing internally in relief at some semblance of normalcy.

-Still Wednesday -

I met Connor’s gym friend. To be honest, already forgot his name. He gave me a wink when he shook my hand and I couldn’t stop staring all dinner. I think even Connor picked up on it. He looked almost jealous with all the attention I usually gave him being directed at the stranger. The stranger asked to use the bathroom, and I wanted to let him know how to get to it, but he seemed to already know the path.

“Hey bro, is it cool if I stay the night?“ I nodded automatically, lost in deep thought.

There’s something peculiar about the Connor’s gym friend. And I didn’t notice it until I was already in bed. Then hit me like a brick. 

That fucking smirk. 

-End-

If anyone knows who this guy is, please let me know… for.. uh.. research purposes.