#like man almost 4 years in and i honest to god just love her more and more every day

[wolfisland]

painting me and my wife because idk im insane

[deansmom]

The fact that the spn fandom is entirely incapable of a nuanced discussion involving Dean and the relationship with his mother shouldn’t surprise me as much as it did when I came back to fandom, and as much as it still does when I’m forced to see it with my own two eyeballs

Mary Winchester was a person before she was a mother, and I’m going to be so honest with you, I think by the time she died, John didn’t like who that person was. So I think when she died, he did what a lot of people do, which is put the person they lost on a pedestal. And that’s who Dean grew up hearing about, that’s what all of his memories of his mom were contextualized with, this person who didn’t exist. And so then his mom comes back and I think it’s very, very clear to Dean almost immediately that this isn’t the same person John told him about.

In the real world, we have no context to draw from and nothing to compare it to, the experience of getting a dead parent back and to be part of your life again. We can’t know how he felt beyond what we were shown in canon - So of course Dean is thrilled, but he’s also a Winchester and deeply traumatized, and tries so hard to make it seem normal and not internalize his complicated feelings about her and her being alive. He’s dealing with:

Grappling with losing the mother he was told she was and resenting mary for it because she’s standing in front of him

Realizing that John robbed so much from him by denying him the version of his mother who feels like looking in a mirror

The guilt of how and why mary is there

Trying to reconcile his feelings of resentment and anger that he knows should be directed at John, but John’s not there, so they end up getting directed at mary, and feeling bad about that

A deeply traumatized inner child who has his safe person back, and just wants his mom to hold him and tell him it’s going to be okay, but he knows that isn’t fair to ask of her

And meanwhile mary was dealing with

✨trauma✨ from being brought back to life

Having to confront her own failures as a parent (which is silly it’s not her fault she died but y’know, feelings tend to be silly)

Having to reconcile her toddler with the man in front of her who’s older than her being her son

Seeing so much of John’s worst qualities in both of them and recognizing the trauma of a shitty dad

The fact that they had this idea of who she was, and it’s nothing like her at all, and trying to understand why John would lie to them while also probably coming to terms with what looks like confirmation of her own worst fears about who she was as a parent

I cannot stress this enough: the last time her feet touched the ground, she had been married, with a new baby, and a 4 year old, she wasn’t a hunter, John barely knew about hunting, and it was the 80’s. She woke up in what, 2017 and her husband’s dead, her babies are grown men (again: older than her!!!) and the most prolific hunters in the world. Oh, also, angels? God? The afterlife?? Funny story! Like I’m sorry, you wanted her to have well-adjusted coping skills for that????

The Mary hate just gets me because she’s Dean in a different font, and so many of y’all hate her for such superficial bullshit that you could let go of if you took 5 seconds to think about the situation critically for both of them. The only bad guy here is, was and will always be John Winchester. John was there, but Mary tried her best. Mary tried to do what was best for them when she left, because she didn’t want to damage their idea of who she was anymore than she had. Mary literally died trying to save Sam from the destiny that heaven had written for him - John couldn’t be bothered to think about his kids.

And if you think that Dean ever genuinely hated Mary, your critical thinking skills need some work. The thing that prompts his speech in 12.22 is Mary saying to his younger self, “I only want good things for you, Dean. I'll never let anything bad happen to you.” So he says

I hate you. And I love you. 'Cause I can't – I can't help it. You're my Mom. And I understand...'cause I have made deals to save the ones I love more than once.

I forgive you. I forgive you. For all of it. Everything. On the other side of this, we can start over, okay? You, me, Sam. We can get it right this time. But I need you to fight. Right now, I need you to fight. I need you – I need you to look at me, Mom. I need you to really look at me and see me. Mom, I need you to see me. Please.

Translation: “you’re right. I resent you for not being the person I was sold, I resent you for your death being the thing that ruined dad, I resent you for being the touchstone for so many of heaven’s plans for us. I resent you because you’re here, and John isn’t, and it’s easier to hate someone tangible than someone dead. And if I hate you, it’s only because I can see so much of myself in you, and I’m so incredibly angry that John treated us the way he did. My whole world, my whole identity revolves around you being someone that you never were, and wrapping my head around that is scary, but when I pull my head out of my ass and look around, you were just a kid. And you did your best, you’ve always tried to do what’s best for me and Sam, and I don’t hate you. I don’t know if I like you right now because you’re a stranger, which is scary - but I love you. So please, mom, I’m sorry that I’ve been taking my bullshit out on you. Just… try. For me. Please.”

Anyways!!! You guys don’t deserve Mary.

[ananxiousgenz]

TPP HADESTOWN AU PART 4

ANOTHA ONE. i am so sorry guys, but the muse has possessed me and i literally cannot stop writing. this is no longer a flash fic. i am now a slave to the au. this time will be a direct continuation of part 3 because honestly i wanted to keep writing that but i also just wanted to post it so consider this a kind of part 2 to part 3 if that makes sense

tpp mutuals come get your juice!!! @smidgen-of-hotboy @ceaseless-watchers-special-girl @urjover @one-joe-spoopy @waters-and-the-wilde

when he said his name, juno heard it.

ringing in the background like the hum of a crystal wine glass.

the song.

when peter nureyev said his name, the song echoed with it.

"your name has the same melody," juno breathed, eye wide and searching for some kind of answers on the face of this strange, beautiful man. how could his name have the song of spring laced through it?

nureyev shot him a sideways look and took a sip of his drink. "so. what do you do for a living, lady who's going to marry me?" he questioned, leaning back in his chair and looking juno over with a gaze he could only describe as skeptical.

"oh! well, I work here at the bar with rita. she's over there. but you've met her already so I don't know why I'm introducing her."

rita gave a friendly wave from her perch behind the bar.

"I also, um. I, uh. I sing. sometimes. not all the time. i'm not bad at it. typically when I do sing, someone will give me a couple bucks. it's nice. oh, and uh, I can play guitar too, but I haven't done it in years, and to be honest, I don't really want to-"

nureyev cut juno off, looking away disinterestedly and downing the rest of his drink. "that's nice. so you're like all the other bar workers in existence. that doesn't exactly sound like something I'd want to marry."

suddenly, the butterflies that had been gradually building in juno's stomach began to unexpectedly drop dead.

"heyyyyyyy, that's not very nice, mista nureyev. mista steel isn't like all the otha ladies you eva met! he's a very supa awesome lady who I love workin' with and-oh oh oh! mista steel! you GOTTA tell him about that song you're workin' on! it's so pretty! and important! I'm sure mista nureyev would LOVE to hear about that!" rita cried, bounding off the bar and hustling over to deliver another drink to the table.

"oh, uh, yeah! I'm working on this song to bring spring back again," juno said, feeling mildly embarrassed that rita brought it up with this man who was still basically a total stranger. "it's not done, honestly, it needs a lot of work. but, when i'm finished with it, it will hopefully fix.....everything."

"wait just a moment." nureyev's brow furrowed and juno's stomach twisted at the sight. even when he was skeptical and defensive and bone-tired, he was still so damn attractive. gods, what juno wouldn't give to just kiss him right now- focus, steel, he's trying to talk to you-

"so you say this song will bring spring back again?"

"yup! at least it should."

"that's...." nureyev placed a finger over his lips in thought. "I haven't seen a proper spring in at least a decade, maybe more. the world has been so wrong in recent years... I shudder to think where it would all end up without the return of warmer weather."

"well, that's the idea with the song. I want to fix it. all of it. when the song is done it should put the world back on track. more sunshine, springs, falls, rain and flowers. you know. all the stuff that's just sort of been missing. maybe you could help me out with it!" juno grinned a bit sheepishly.

"and why would I want to help?" his eyes were cold, almost as cold as the biting wind and frost outside, but juno thought he saw the beginning of a thaw at the edges of his facade.

"because, mista nureyev. he's real good at makin' people feel like life is worth livin' again with that music of his. also, he makes the BEST chocolate cake i've eva had! and frannie agrees with me!" rita chimed in, cleaning the bar top as best she could with her short stature.

juno snorted involuntarily, marveling at rita's ability to constantly be focused on food. "it's true, I won a local competition a few years back for that cake."

nureyev's face had half a smile on it now, and the butterflies in juno's stomach turned into a hurricane.

"so you can make people feel alive again? that's quite a gift, juno. but what else can you offer me?"

"huh?"

"say, for example, if we were to get married. who would pay for the wedding rings? times have been hard, and gold is scarce. how would you do it?"

juno thought for a moment. "the rivers. they've got plenty of gold in them, and if my song works, they'll give it all to us for wedding rings."

nureyev's eyes glinted with something juno suspected was either curiosity or suspicion.

"what about a wedding feast? or a bed? good food and better beds are hard to come by these days. what would you do about that, juno?"

"the trees would take care of the wedding feast, and the birds would take care of the bed."

"with your song." nureyev cocked an eyebrow as though it was a question.

"well, yeah, of course."

"you talk a lot about that song. why don't you sing it for me?"

a wave of panic stuttered through juno's mind. "I can't. I told you it's not finished."

"you said you wanted to take me home and marry me, is that true?

a sly smile crossed nureyev's face, and goddammit it only made juno want him even more. "yes," he breathed.

"then sing the song for me, juno."

juno hesitated, then nodded in spite of himself. he shouldn't be doing this, he knew he shouldn't be doing this, but he couldn't help it.

he was in love.

and lovers need the spring like a flower needs sunshine. so he'd sing the sunshine back for peter nureyev.

he stepped back, breathed in, and let the notes flow from him like water from a faucet. the song flooded the room, hitting the walls and rushing back to his ears in perfect harmonies, and for a moment, he was back in that wheat field with benten, strumming guitar as he danced like a pheonix rising from the ashes, spinning around and around and around like he was the center of the universe.

and then the song ended. and juno was back in a shitty roadside bar, holding a perfect dahlia in his left hand, with peter nureyev staring at him now, eyes wide and sparkling.

"that's...... you...... how did you do that?" nureyev asked quietly, standing from the table on unsteady legs and taking the dahlia to examine it with shaking hands.

"i didn't do that, the song did," juno muttered as nureyev gently touched the immaculate petals of the dahlia, still damp with dew. rita beamed at juno from the bar and gave an overenthusiastic thumbs-up. juno just rolled his eyes again.

peter nureyev looked at him then, all of the previous frostiness gone from his eyes and something like amazement and love and hope spilling through them.

juno decided that he liked it when he looked like that. it made him feel like he really could fix the whole damn world with that song of his.

nureyev seemed to come to some sort of conclusion and slipped the dahlia into the buttonhole of his traveling coat. "so, what time does your shift end, my dear juno?"

juno thought for a minute. "uhhhh, the bar closes around 10. why?"

his eyes gleamed like a pair of stars as a smile twinkled on his lips. "didn't you say you were going to marry me?"

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

Going back to our roots here what’s your brutally honest opinion about lucaya and joshaya if you’re up for some throwbacks

this message physically aged me 45 years 😭

lucaya- like, it was obviously planned from the beginning, but here's the thing: their dynamic was tired as hell. you see it in every piece of media ever. they were BORING. also I just genuinely almost never liked lucas lmfao. there were a handful of lines throughout 3 seasons that got a laugh out of me- and it was always when he was playing the idiot or confused part, if they had just let him be the wannabe eric of the show it could have been amazing. as for maya, I definitely wasn't as attached to her as I was riley, she just kinda got on my nerves a bit, but Dear God Did She Deserve Better. the triangle was drawn out WAY too long. by the end of it both girls should have left lucas in the dust. we see the 'official' triangle plotline start on new years eve, and end in late september/early october. in no world should it have taken him that long, ESPECIALLY when he knew what a strain it was putting on the girls relationship. if he really cared he would have stepped back, like, literally, it is very very possible to have feelings for someone and not date them, oh my God. farkle had the girls fighting over him ONE time and was like 'hey no I love you guys too much to see you upset'. lucas friar you will always be hated<3

joshaya- I need to get this out of the way because I saw it so much: maya was not trying to date josh when she snuck into the college party. the college girls were not telling josh to date maya. one of josh's friends hits on maya and riley and maya said We Are In Eighth Grade. she's not delusional. the whole episode was how she wanted josh to stop ignoring her. there's subtext ladies!!! cory and topanga were practically raising maya since she was 5. even if it's not addressed too well on screen, you have to be aware that maya and josh have known each other practically their whole lives. considering how close josh is with cory, riley, and auggie, that tells us he saw the family on a regular basis growing up (he literally left his parents and took a train at like 4 in the morning just so cory could open his college letter with him). so josh and maya were likely good friends as children! what we see with his introduction to the show is he starts treating her more as a kid, as his niece's friend, and thinks her feelings are silly and she says No. I need you to take me seriously here. I don't want our friendship to change just because you're in college now. my feelings are not stupid and I want you to respect me. (also. side note. they never said josh's age in the show right?? because for him to start college when he did would make him older than he should have been based on the boy meets world timeline...like, I was kinda working under the assumption he skipped a grade or two in high school but everyone else was like Known Grown Man And Pedophile Josh Matthews Asked A Toddler To Go To The Movies As Friends lmfao). anyway. she asks him to respect her and he does!!! genuine shock and awe! lucas friar found dead in a ditch! lmao. their vague 'let's see how we feel in a few years' talk reminded me a lot of the cory/topanga yearbook quote scene, and they had great chemistry! it didn't feel like something I've seen a thousand times before. it's not like they promised to swear off dating and wait for her 18th birthday, she was basically dating zay by the end of the show. they just said 'we've known each other for a while, there's definitely something between us but this isn't the right time for us to explore it, so let's be friends like we used to' (see: what lucas should have done during the triangle). josh had a tiny bit of an edge to him, but with the dorky matthews heart, which tbh was exactly what maya wanted. I loved how maya acted around josh, it lead to some of her funniest and most open moments in the show. I loved how gentle josh was with her even when she was being annoying. I love a good childhood crush to actual lovers story! sue me! lmao I think if the show had gotten as many seasons as boy meets world they really could have been something special

[dont-blame-it-on-the-kids]

Haven’t read avatar tales or the lost adventures yet.

But I read (most of) the ATLA comics!

Spoilers

Approx Timeline Order:

Katara and the Pirate's Silver mid. Honestly. The pirates are cool and all but it didn't really add much for me. 4/10

Suki, Alone was actually a really good addition to the plot line! It explained a lot and it did a pretty good job in the short comic style. Wish Kyoshi actually showed up more for her tho? She had like one speaking line that was echoing what Suki was already saying then she was Gone 6/10

The Promise was boring honestly. Zuko was the bad guy again?? Only thing I remember is it started to shake up Aang’s “the four nations need to remain separate to be in balance” ideals. Establishes Yu Dao as an old fire nation colony and how life there has changed over 100 years. Also Katara being… soft about Aang’s promise to End Zuko even tho she fucking told him straight up in the show if he stepped out of line she would kill him. 3/10

The Search, god Ursa is so unwell and honestly Azula gets it from her 100% they blame Ozai but it’s also gotta be Ursa too. Azula having complete mental breakdown. The continued influence of Ozai on the kids and the fire nation was a good set up. Ursa literally putting Zukos life on the line to prove Ozai was intercepting her letters to home she wasn’t supposed to be sending anyway was insane. Giant face and memory stealing spirit who said she would only give out one favor but ending up giving out like four? Amazing. Aang’s negotiating skills 0% helpful. Serving me a PTSD milf on a silver platter who’s made some awful choices. 10/10

The Rift I’m going to be very honest I am so sad we didn’t get to see more of the acolytes in this one. (And I’m UPSET we didn’t see any older one of the original acolytes covering their tattoos in LOK that would have been an amazing plot point.) TOPH!!!! God Toph rocked in this one. And go Poppy for dumping Lao’s ass lmao, sad we didn’t see her tho. Gonna be honest I didn’t clock in this one that the valley was where RC was built. Basic story, cool bending, and possibly Suyins father?? Idk after seeing it I’d be convinced. CABBAGE MAN!!! My truest fave lmao loved the overt shots of him deciding to get Cabbage Corp up and running. It would have been cool if they mentioned that one in Imbalance tho as a facility. Also seeing Yangchen!! 6/10

Macha Makers iroh gets a crushhh and also spirits work with him like it’s after LoK b2? Very cool. It’s pretty good for one of the free comic shorts 6/10

Toph Beifong’s Metalbending Academy honestly not much happens in this one. Suki is adorable. We see a lava bender named Sun and we Never See them AGAIN 3/10

Smoke and Shadow this one FUCKED SO HARD my godddd my PTSD MILF on a silver platter. Azula being so unwell and Kiyi fucking nailing firebending poses she saw Zuko do once and escaped the cell with all the kids. Tom Tom is adorable. Mai and Ty Lee bonding moments my godddd 10/10

Azula and the Spirit Temple gosh this one was pretty good. Loved the spirit tho a hope to see more of that haunting thing if we ever get an ending to azula’s story. Azula having a spirit lead mental breakdown? 8/10

North and South oh god. This one was basically LoK b2 all over again. How many time are these guys gonna fight?? And tbh I ALSO don’t like how in LoK the south looked like a mini replica of the Northern tribe. So seeing the explanation of why and then it kinda just being allowed was not fun. I feel like they could have done something more than recycle a LoK plot line but okay whatever. 2/10

Imbalance 😒 talk about recycled plot lines. How many water benders are going to try to pit benders and non benders against eachother? Bad guy was almost cool. A good bit of set up for how Cranetown actually grew into Republic City, it would be nice if LoK incorporated the original spirits of that valley tho. Especially when the portal opened. Art was amazing and Toph going undercover then immediately blowing that cover was amazing. if the bad guy here or Any of the set up was mentioned in LoK and it was expanded upon here it would be better. Like if Amon referenced Liling as part of the reason the Equalists formed. I know this is the problem with pre-quils 4/10

Not in timeline order:

The Bounty Hunter and the Tea Brewer iroh redemption arch for the worst directing choices made for him in the show? Yup. Gives June a good ending. Actually kinda like the set up of the tea cartel. Over all a nice short story. 6/10

Lost and Found very short story about Toph being good with kids?? Very cute. 7/10

[boydepartment]

Pizza Parlor- Lee Felix: Chapter Four

Description: Y/n is a stressed-out college student who has no idea what she is doing with her life. She is always wrapped up in nostalgia and her friends seem to know exactly what they're doing. Feeling insecure one night she decides to go on an old website. Club Penguin. Little does she know; she would encounter a certain penguin who was also having a rough night.

Stray Kids are idols, TXT is not.

Partial smau, mainly written.

Warnings for chapter 4: cursing, house egging, kinda scary reaction image??

WC- 2.1k back next

  masterlist  

                                                                                            ```

Song for Chapter 4: Not A Love Song – Austin Moon

Chapter 4: Late Night Talks.

                “OH MY GOD STOP YOU KNOW FOR A FACT THAT MORDECAI BELONGS WITH MARGARET NOT CJ.” You sat back in your chair and started laughing, currently you were in a heated debate on whether Mordecai should’ve ended up with Margaret or CJ in Regular Show.

                “CJ WAS SO NICE! AND SHE TOTALLY REMINDS ME OF YOU SO.” Felix said back, getting WAY too close to his surprisingly good quality mic.

                You gathered yourself from laughing, “MORDECAI DIDN’T DESERVE HER THOUGH, IT DOESN’T MATTER IF SHES BETTER.”

                “Okay what did MORDECAI DO?!”

                You almost fell back laughing, “FELIX, LITERALLY WHAT DIDN’T MORDECAI DO?!”

                Felix let out a small chuckle and thought for a moment, “okay you have a point…”

While talking more about the childhood show you got a text from Yeonjun, you were surprised he was still up, it was pushing 5am.

After he stopped replying you gave your attention back to Felix, “sorry about that my roommate texted me about our friends debit card.”

                “Is everything okay?” Felix asked.

                You let out a small laugh, “yeah he just texted me telling me our friend literally left his card in his own backpack.”

                “Tell me about your roommates.” He sounded so interested, it made your heart leap.

                “WELL! Yeonjun is a friend from highschool, he is really nice, kinda a weirdo sometimes though, then there’s Kai, he’s a real sweety, me and Yeonjun met him our sophomore year, and then Taeyhun we kinda just picked up off the street.” You let out a small laugh, “Beomgyu and Soobin are in our little group too, but they live on campus.”

                Felix let out a hum of acknowledgement, “wait a sec, you live with really smelly guys?”

Oh man, this was a big reason, aside from your awkwardness, that led you to getting no bitches. When they found out you lived with 3 guys they would run for the hills. So, that’s why you stopped even trying, it was less stressful that way too.

                “Yeah… you don’t think that’s weird, do you?” You were really nervous of his response; you weren’t trying to PERSUE Felix. However, the crazy thought had crossed your mind multiple times.

                “NO NOT AT ALL!” You heard him bump into his mic a bit, “you’ve known them since highschool, I don’t think that’s weird at all!!!” He was very quick to reassure you.

                “I am really relieved; a lot of people go running to the hills when they find out I hang out with all those weirdos.” Taking a sip of water, you went to open the steam icon, you and Felix got way off track from playing video games tonight.

                “I won’t, pinky promise, I was friends with a lot of girls in highschool if I’m being honest.” He spoke so smoothy, it still takes you off guard when you really think about it.

                “Are you not now?” You joked, not expecting this conversation to take a serious turn.

                “Not really, I mean I have colleagues but it’s hard with my job.” After Felix answered you felt immensely confused.

                “What is that supposed to mean? Are you like a male stripper or something?”

                Felix let out a loud laugh, “nonono! Although sometimes it does feel like it…”

                You joined him in laughter, still confused as ever but it was okay. Laughing with Felix always made your heart race over text or now on call. You couldn’t help thinking though if he had some weird Magic Mike job or something. Honestly with as much charisma he has you wouldn’t be surprised if he did work in a field like that. There was nothing wrong with that either.

                “Did you have a favorite game growing up other than club penguin?” He broke you out of your thoughts.

                “I played a lot of Toon Town and stuff, I was mainly a Nintendo kid too.” You smiled, remembering all the fun times you had when you were a kid. It was also as like Felix emitted the same warm feeling.

                He let out a loud noise of agreence, “I AM STILL A NINTENDO KID!! When my friends and I get breaks from working whether it be at a venue or hotel we always bring a switch! I remember this one time during one of our breaks my friend totally lost his shit… It was so funny.”

HE HAS TO DO SOME SORT OF PREFORMING! HE MENTIONED A VENUE… Hmm this was truly some puzzle that YOU wanted to crack.

                “That sounds really nice, my friends and I haven’t done that since highschool. It has mainly been movie nights and cooking dinner together.” You answered.

                “Hm! We do that too! I bake a lot.” This thought made you smile, he BAKES!

                Part of you felt that it was so easy connecting with him, “my grandma and I used to bake!”

                “Oh really? Do you have a favorite recipe?”

                You thought for a minute before answering, “definitely her cheesecake.”

                “Don’t let my stupid friend who likes Moshi Monsters hear you say that, I think he’d start begging you for a copy.” Even though you two were far away from each other it really felt like you could’ve been next to one another.

                “I wouldn’t give it to him anyways, he likes Moshi Monsters.” You joked, “oh! You mentioned you liked baking too! What is your favorite?”

                He clicked his tongue before answering, “probably brownies, the last time I baked cookies it was a disaster. And it was in front of a TON of people.”

                “I am so jealous I love brownies.” The thought of them made your stomach growl.

                Felix accidentally hit his mic again before speaking, “not to BRAG or anything but I am known as the brownie boy amongst my friends.”

                “Wooooow!” You teased him.

                “Oh shit! Whats your steam username?” Felix asked, now also being reminded of the goal.

                “Oh its-“ You were about to answer when you heard something at your front door, “um hold on a sec… I’ll be right back.”

You heard Felix say something as you got up from your laptop. Who on earth would be at your door this early in the morning? Hell, you shouldn’t even be awake after not sleeping all night. You walked to the door and checked the peephole, you saw three people standing outside dressed in dark colors. Okay what the fuck??

The next thing you knew one of them was digging through their bag and throwing it at your door! WHY WAS YOUR APARTMENT BEING EGGED!?

You quickly grabbed the bat by the door and slammed open the door, all three figures yelped and started running. Looking down you noticed one of them dropped something out of their backpack. You walked over and leaned forward to pick it up.

                “Samantha Heeler.” You read the name ID outloud.

This was Beomgyu’s girlfriend’s friend. Those fucking- there goes not wanting a strained relationship anymore. You huffed and went back inside, locking the door behind you. You slammed the ID on the island and immediately ran to your room. You grabbed your phone which laid on your desk. You quickly dialed Yeonjun until he finally picked up.

                “Y/n what is going on!?” He sounded somewhat annoyed but also tired.

                “TELL BEOMGYU HIS STUPID GIRLFRIEND AND HER FRIENDS EGGED OUR APARTMENT. I WOULDN’T HAVE KNOWN IF ONE OF THEM DIDN’T DROP HER FUCKING ID CARD WHILE THROWING AN EGG.” You were furious at this point, you walked out, completely forgetting Felix was on the call on your laptop.

                “Wait what!?” At this point he was fully awake. You hit the facetime button and he quickly accepted it; he looked like probably has a hangover. You showed him the ID and your egg covered door as well. He looked absolutely furious.

                “Fuck. Okay I will send like Kai or Taehyun back. I need to talk to Soobin and Gyu.” He hung up and you were left to clean up your door. Beforehand you took photos of the mess and the school ID. You squatted down and tried to clean up the eggshells, you were now tired, it being 6am now. Getting lost in your thoughts you were totally taken aback when something was thrown at your head. You touched your hair and felt the gooey substance, when you turned you saw the three girls again. They were laughing at the fact they just hit their main target. You were so close to losing your shit, but you already knew you had somewhat of the upper hand here. Yeonjun knew what happened, you had photos, it was fine. You simply just finished cleaning and went back inside. You mumbled when you walked into your room and slammed the door behind you.

                “Y/n?” You heard from your headphones. OH MY GOD YOU FORGOT FELIX WAS ON THE PHONE. You quickly rushed over to your desk and put your headphones on that now were covered in egg. Good going y/n.

                “Felix I am so sorry I totally forgot you were on the call you could have just hung up I wouldn’t have gotten offended or anything.” You were rambling.

                He let out a yawn, “it’s okay I promise, I wanted to make sure everything was okay. You’re home alone, right?”

You wanted to make a joke about him sounding creepy but held back, “yeah I am now…”

                “Gosh what is wrong with the area you’re living in?” Felix let out a soft laugh.

                “College town I guess…” You mumbled, letting out a yawn, “and my friend’s girlfriend hates me. I have to get egg out of my hair then sleep, I accidentally pulled an all-nighter cause of you again.”

                “WHAT Y/N DON’T DO THAT BECAUSE OF ME! THAT ISNT HEALTHY!” Felix got close to his mic AGAIN, you winced at the loudness but then started laughing. You thought he was so cute.

                “I’m sorry, I’m sorry you’re just nice to talk to… Things here have been a little complicated…” Your voice trailed off around the end, getting lost in thought, partially due to sleep deprivation. Felix let out a sigh.

                “I get what you mean, with my schedule and stuff, things have been complicated for me too…” His voice trailed off as well.

                “…It’s like talking to you is a breath of fresh air.” You both said at the same time.

                “OH!” You perked up now fully awake and fully aware that egg was STILL on you. Felix laughed what you presumed it to be from nerves.

                “I should get this egg out of my hair…” You let out a soft laugh now messing with it. He let out a hum of acknowledgement.

                “And please get some rest too… I should start heading to sleep too.” Shuffling.

                “Goodnight Felix.”

                “Goodnight y/n.”

---------------------------------------------------------------------- Taglist: @bloofairyfox @yellowroses-world @g4m3girl @forevrglow Taglist is always open! ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Authors note: Hiiii everyone!!! Surprise!! I posted again! I finished another two chapters today and I am in a very good mood so I figured why not lol! I hope everyone is having a good night or good day!! My ask box and dms are always open <3 Eat well today and tomorrow

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

[wellisntthatinteresting]

The Tortured Jiara Department #10

I’ve had this sitting in my drafts for at least a month. I really wanted to do 10 parts but I couldn’t decide which song would be our swan song.

In light of the trailer and other goodies we’ve been fed recently, I decided to go with a song that might fit season 4. And so here we are, with one of my fave cuts from TTPD (probably an unpopular opinion).

🎵Song

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)

💿Track number

11

👫Whose vibes are we picking up on?

Pfffft well we know it’s about JJ! On the first listen I knew Kie was our narrator

💕Lyric loves

“They shake their heads saying, "God, help her" / When I tell them he's my man”

“The dopamine races through his brain / On a six-lane Texas highway / His hand so calloused from his pistol / Softly traces hearts on my face”

“I can fix him, no, really I can (no, really I can) / Whoa, maybe I can't”

✍️Wellisntthatinteresting’s take

It looks like we’re in for a lot of angst this season (I’m here for it). And the more I see, the more I think Kiara will struggle with JJ’s behavior and that’s going to be a pretty important theme for her this year. She has gone to bat for all the Pogues but especially JJ when it comes to her parents. With JJ looking like he’s going off the rails a bit, Kie will struggle to understand why and more than ever feel a bit like it’s a lost cause justifying JJ’s actions to her parents.

This song isn’t the most Jiara by a long shot but I do think some of Kie’s season 4 feelings might be captured here pretty accurately. I also adore the “traces hearts on my face” line - I really feel like at the end of the day they are well matched and have that tenderness with one another but outside forces will definitely take their toll.

And if I’m being completely honest, this song’s vibe just screams JJ to me and has since the first listen. The twangy guitar, the almost country western feel, more breathy vocals…this one gets a 9/10.

Thanks for coming on this journey with me! T-minus 2 weeks until OBX4!

[queenmiarys]

The Royal Romance none Royal

Mini series: through hell and back

Face claims: Elyse Dufour as Olivia Nevrakis, Steven Strait as Anton Severus

Synopsis: Olivia falls in love with a successful businessman, everything not  as perfect it seems. 

Pairing: Olivia and Anton for now.

Rated M 

Warning: some chapters will contain domestic violence, Emotional abuse, NSFW (lemon) , 18+ Only

Most characters belong to Pixelberry , Amelia Rys, Juliana Beaumont belong to me.

Song inspiration : hell and back. 

Part 1: First impressions

It  was 5 am. Olivia hit her alarm and jumped out of bed "Ki,  are you going to work out with me today?"

"OMG, Liv really it's 5am." She says barely woke good, she barely opened one eye to check her phone 

"It's the best time." Olivia said. 

Kiara turned back over and covered her head with her blanket. "Get up ki, you've been begging me to start helping you to get in better shape,  so get  your lazy butt up, I'll give you 5 seconds.

"Oh God really Liv?"

I have my ice cold water ready, don't make me use it."

They got to  Piedmont park, and worked out for a good hour.

"Can we please go home?"

"Come on ki, to look this good you gotta put in effort, besides I know you have your eyes on a certain someone." She said with a wink. 

"Hmmm and who is this someone?"

"Really ki, don't think I haven't noticed your eyeing our new neighbor across the hall from us, I saw you checking her out."

Kiara rolled her eyes."I'm not even sure if I'm into girls or just sick of men."

"Ki, you'll figure it out you're only 20 in a few months, how about one more lap around and I'll treat us to a non fat Latte."

"You should start with a latte, but I need food,  that blueberry smoothie gone."

As they came around the last lap,Kiara noticed a man sitting watching them "Liv, I believe one of us has an admirer."

The man noticed they caught him staring, he placed his glasses on and walked over. "Hello beautiful ladies, sorry for just staring at you it's just rare to see someone so natural these days.

"I'm Kiara and this is Olivia." Olivia nudge her side, giving her an annoyed look.

"Well it's nice to meet you Olivia." He said as he brushed his lips across the back of her hand. "I know you don't know me but I would love it if you had dinner with me sometime, here's my number if you need some time to think about it."

"Ki, come on let's go." 

Once they made it to Olivia's car Kiara looked at her in disbelief. "Really Liv, you haven't been out in almost 3 years, look I know you loved or still love Drake, but just giving up is not the answer, you are only 20, and that guy is totally handsome and into you, at least consider it you deserve one night to be treated like a queen."

. 

Later in the week. 

Liv placed the paper with Anton's number on top of her desk, asking herself should she actually give him a chance. It was now Thursday and it had been 4 days.

She picked up the paper, staring at it for a while before finally deciding to call him. 

"You reached Anton, sorry I've missed your call, please leave a short detailed message at the tone and I'll return your call as soon as possible, And as always have a wonderful day." 

She hung up, and laid across her bed. 

3 Hours later. Olivia was half asleep when she heard her phone go off, Good Afternoon this Anton with tech support. How may I help you today?"

He immediately recognized her voice. "I'm so sorry I have my cell connected  to my work phone, just in case someone runs into problems and they transfer them to me."

"So what do you do?" 

She could hear him  yarning through the phone. "I'm the CEO of world tech, my family owns it."

'Wait you're Anton Severus?' 

"That would be me, wait you heard of me,?" She could hear him smiling against the phone."

"My father owns PC tech, I have an upcoming meeting with you next week to explain our brand.'

" Oh wow, I can't believe I didn't recognize your name, but I gotta be honest I expected Mrs.Nevrakis

She became quiet for a moment, and charged the subject, her mom died of stage 2 lung cancer, five days before her 12th birthday. "I'm so sorry I didn't mean to upset you, are you still there 

"Yes I'm here, it's okay my mom passed away a long time ago and you didn't know." 

"Again I apologize."

He yawned again. "Olivia I'm glad you called me, I would love to take you out sometimes, is that something you would like?" 

\

"Okay I'll love too."

"Perfect, send your address and I'll pick you up Saturday evening around 7, is that okay?"

"How about we meet up, I'm still getting to know you Mr. Severus, just in case you turn out to be some psychopath I will have a way home." Olivia joked.

He didn't say anything for a minute. " Very well then, I'm just glad you accepted my invitation." He yawned again. ..

"Good night, it sounds like someone needs to rest."

"You're right, I do, been up since 5 am."

"Wow, please go get some rest." They hung up and she turned to see Kiara standing in the door." How long have you been there?

"Long enough to know that you finally decided to call him." 

She threw a pillow at her. "I know when I'm not wanted. Kiara said while sticking her tongue out making a silly face. 

"Ki, wait since you're all up in my business, what about you, have you introduced yourself to the girl next door?"

"No, I haven't even seen her again." 

"Come with me Ki?"

"And just where are we going?" 

"To meet her, she's been here nearly 2 weeks now."

They stepped out in the hallway and walked to the women's door and knocked on the woman door. 

"Be there in a second." The woman called out. Once she opened the door wearing a yellow and white sundress. Kiara ran her eyes up and down her body sending chills down her body

She noticed Kiara checking her out and blushed. " Sorry to interrupt your day, we live across the hall and just wanted to meet you." Olivia spoke.

"That was so sweet of you to do, I'm Hana Lee nice to meet you, and you are?" 

"I'm Olivia and this is Kiara."

"Would you like to come in?" 

"Maybe another time, for me at least but perhaps Kiara might want to stay, I have an early day tomorrow. She nudged her side

—----------------------------

Saturday evening.

Olivia had got home and showered and changed into a sexy black and red dress, on que Anton texted the address,at the same time phone rong. 

"Hello?" Hey Liam, how are you?"  you want to meet Sunday?" Okay I'll be there." 

Another call came through. "Max what's up?"

"A little bird told me you have a hot date tonight." 

"Damn ki, she mumbled under her breath."It's just dinner 

"I'm happy for you, that you're getting back out there, for a minute there I thought I was going to sign you up for speed dating on tictoc  or something."  He laughed. 

"Max I'm a big girl, I can manage my own dating life." 

"Okay got it boss."

"Max it's after 7 let me get out of here, before he thinks I abandoned him." 

"Later Liv." 

It took her 20 minutes to arrive at the restaurant, it was a very  upscale Greek restaurant. 

"Good day Ma'am' I'll take your car and this gentleman will show you to your table Ms. Nevrakis

"Wait, how do you know my name?"

"Mr. Severus has brought out the entire restaurant for the evening for just the 2 of you." The man said

"Thank you." 

"Wow, fancy, all this for me?"

"What can I say, I really like you a lot Olivia." 

They sat and ate dinner and talked.

"So why did you buy this place for just the two of us?" She was curious.

"I take it you don't read teck today?" 

"No sorry, but I believe my father does 

"Well I was on the cover 6 months ago, I have strange women wanting to take pictures and to meet me. I have this one who asked me to marry her, even though I know nothing about her, so for your sake I didn't want them heckling you." He said with a smirk. 

"Wow, I'm really enjoying myself here."

.

"Did you believe you wouldn't?"

"Honestly I didn't know, I went on a date a few months back and had a terrible time." I was left fronting a $100.00 dinner bill this guy climbed to have lifted  his wallet at home."

" That, sob I'm sorry, that happened to you."

"Would you like dessert ?"

"Love some."

After leaving the restaurant Anton offered to follow Olivia to make sure she got home okay.

"That's okay, I'm fine we live in a safe neighborhood." 

"Please,  I won't feel comfortable leaving you alone, even though it's only 11:00

She let out a sigh. " Come on, you can follow me.

Once they got to her apartment, they stood at the front entrance. " Would you like to come in?

"Sure I would love it if it would get me more time with you." He said, smiling down at her.

Once they entered, they were greeted by the door man, in order to use the elevator you had to have a pass key or a guest pass key, they reached the 22nd floor, and walked to her apartment 2203. "How about we can watch a movie or we could talk some more." She said nervously.

"We could do that, I won't try anything,  you don't seem ready for right now, but do you mind if I kiss you?"

"I suppose that would be fine, and thank you for understanding." 

He didn't say much, they made out and found a movie on Netflix. Before they knew it they were both sound asleep on the sofa when Kiara returned home at 3am. 

Olivia heard a noise and quickly jumped up on her feet. "Who's there to speak now?

"It's just us Kiara peeped from the kitchen, followed by Hana.

"What the hell are you two doing at 3 am?"

"I was just showing her around, then we went to this new club about 3 blocks from here."

Kiara smiled. "I assumed you had a good time, you usually don't bring a date home."

They didn't hear Anton but he was standing in the doorway." I'm glad to hear that this type of thing isn't normal for you either." They all jumped at the sound of his voice.

",Hello again Kiara right?. And I don't know your name. 

"I'm Hana, the new neighbor across the hall. Nice to meet you, and you are?" 

"I'm Anton." 

"Olivia, I'm so sorry I fell asleep on you, but I must say that's the nicest sofa I ever slept on." 

They all laughed. Well it's 3:30, lucky I'm off the weekends but I would like to get home and get some rest."

Well I'd better too, get home myself, nice meeting you."

Olivia walked him out and Kiara walked Hana to her apartment.

Once Olivia made it back upstairs Kiara was waiting. 

"So how did your date really go?"

"Ki, nothing to tell, he was a gentleman the whole time." 

"How about you and Hana?" 

"That wasn't a date, besides I don't even know if she's that way yet." 

"Good night Ki, I need some sleep if I'm going to meet Liam and Mia later."

"Okay love you, night."

"Love you more."

@choicesficwriterscreations @kingliam2019 @kingliam2019 @kristinamae093 @yaniradolton @luvquit @harleybeaumont @twinkle-320 @twinkleallnight @queenrileyrose @storyofmychoices @dcbbw @bebepac @cordonian-literature @mom2000aggie @tessa-liam @queenjilian @shewillreadyou @honey358luv @yolandawalker @ao719 @alj4890 @angelasreblogs @aussiegurl1234

[the-zapped-part-timer]

Penn Zerothon Day 4

I'm Super!🦸🏼‍♂️

My Ramblings: I love that Phyllis quietly downplayed the fact that she's zapping them to the Superhero World, she knows Penn will go berserk! His excitement is adorable and I adore the voice acting. I wish I could get that excited for things. Also we see that Phyllis does in fact live and sleep at the Odyssey. Interesting to see her outside, that would've been neat to see her out and about in town more often.

Very Boone to be using the woman's bathroom. Boone really doesn't ever mind wearing a dress or a skirt and if he's a lady, he's rolling with it! Love him for that.

If I had my dream since I was 6 come true, I'd bawl my eyes out!

Funny that only Sashi has an actual Superhero name. At least with Boone we get an idea,  but Penn? Left out to dry.

Wonder if the Super Dog is what got Sam Levine on Super-Pets? I know that's not how it works but it would be funny.

Captain Super Captain is a treasure, RIP Adam West. His force fields look awesome.

Always with the dramatic entrances, eh Rippen? This tells me that your hide out may be underground. Also was the car smashing really necessary? You didn't even throw them!

I love all the Superheroes just yelling their names out like overpowered Pokémon.

What an interesting sound when Larry first springs out of Rippen's suit... also I like expression when Rippen uses his new found super speed. Ya scrambled his brain cells, Rippen! Do you think he was ever embarrassed about having Sashi's powers? Probably thinking I have to take them not because I want but that she can't have them.

Larry almost killed an old man.

I will never be tired of the mystery behind Penn's superhero logo. The theories are endless! We got:

An 8

A dollar sign

Two awesome snakes just hugging

An 8, again

A stack of two donuts

A snowman

And my favorite, two awesome cookies hugging

Like where did you get "two awesome cookies hugging." Rippen? He almost sounds a little innocent here. Also how he said "snowman vibe" is so unbelievably sassy. Rippen really said "HEY" at Penn so annoyingly, I love it.

Penn's great wink is going to someone who desperately needs it.

My god, the remodeling kitchen story and the fact that Rippen's reading his mind? All the same info swirling in his brain? Amazing already. Probably a headache coming on and then BAM! RANDOM ITEM STRAIGHT TO THE DOME! His expressions, he's so confused. Comedy gold.

Also I need you all to do yourself another favor, when Captain Super Captain messes with Rippen's robo-leg wires and says: Captain Regular Captain! Look at his legs. Damn...

I love the idea of Rippen and Larry just getting arrested. We get to see Rippen's nice and simple suit, very stylish.

Just this out of context:

Rippen: To be honest, Larry, it feels better not to have you in my belly.

Larry: Really? I was starting to feel at in there. It was kind of cozy.

And we end off with Penn accidentally destroying the city. The day is saved indeed, mission accomplished.

~The Characters~

Penn Zero: Must have sucked that he wasn't super for most of it because you know, it was his dream since he was 6. But happy he learned that powers aren't everything, it's the inner self within that matters. I'm sure he will still never not freak out when they're zapped here.

Boone Wiseman: Doesn't do a whole lot but I do wonder what he's read in others minds that he didn't bring up. Would've like to see that as a gag. Unused potential.

Sashi Kobayashi: Poor Sash. I don't think her power is that bad, don't underestimate the power of smell! It can be so horrible for so many people sensitive to strong odors.

Rippen: This has been on my mind for years! The fact is he is not a supervillain in this world, no powers! My headcanon is that the villain is bitter about that an wants to steal everyone else's powers. Anyways, so close to winning but the power of teamwork saved the day, as always. I just need to know how this guy and the mutant parasite met!

Larry: Super helpful in this world, he can use his special power and not hurt anyone... hugs! I really like that he played a huge part in the plan and actively participated. He even pushed an old man! Evil points!

Dimension(s): Cool world but raises plenty of questions, mainly: what is the entire world like? Is everyone super? If everyone is super, are they really super? What's it like for people not born or accidentally turned super? Can you accidentally become super? I wanna know! Even the politics!

Forms: I like Sashi's because I like skunks, they're cute! Helps that the purple and green combo slaps. Boone's is alright, he looks good. Penn's... not a huge fan on the yellow to be honest with you. But still looks good, especially those two awesome cookies, hugging.

But Rippen's design is awesome! He's just a guy in a giant mech suit but so what? I like it. Larry's is also really cool! He's just a little purple man worm and apparently worms are my jam now so yay!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Fast and the Floor Rugs🧞‍♂️

My Ramblings: So, they've fought vampires before and of course Sashi kills them in the most slow and painful way imaginable... did she do this to Rippen, who we see a photo of as a vampire. Probably not, I think it's possible Larry did, as we see in the picture in that particular episode, I'll bring it up again.

Is Phyllis reading a romance novel? It's a nice deep red and says something with love on it. I can't properly see it. But good for her.

Penn and Boone didn't even make a peep when they saw Sashi, they both just smiled, but not in a joking way, more of a you look cute today kind of way. I like their smiles. But also I understand her threat, so far in these episodes, I notice a lot of the time we see Sashi last and the boys say something that can come off as them making fun of her. They're never malicious, I just understand her wrath.

There's that monkey obsession of Boone's flaring up.

Bikers! A good twist on the obviously Aladdin inspired world. Interesting to see a lot of evil or mean bikers in media when in real life, a lot of them are nice, some the nicest and most helpful people. Like Bikers Against Child Abuse. Anyways, Rippen's face when Larry vacuums his rug.

Is it a can of worms to bring up the hero being white in a predominantly non-white place? There's something about that, right? I mean, going back to Aladdin... it's certainly a subject.

I like the conflict at hand between Penn and Boone, I mean, Penn isn't entirely wrong but I still feel for Boone, he's trying his best. Probably hurts more considering this is his family's thing to be wise and helpful to the heroes and him failing at that... ouch. I understand both of them, I've been on both sides.

Trouble in bromance land? Yes, Rippen, actually! His little giggle before saying that. Also his expression and sigh when he realizes that Boone is stuck in the lamp. I like him face and voice, ok? And him scoffing at John DiMaggio biker like a peeved off teenage girl? Great.

It's so funny to see Rippen obey to being pulled over by a cop. Like he's evil but he for some reason respects the law... for a minute. He did that earlier with the carpet train, he just sat and waited impatiently while Penn just flew over it. Trying to be a kiss-ass to the cop while fruitlessly trying to find his license on the empty carpet. Until he realizes it's all pointless and he's evil. Shining gold as ever. Larry didn't even try to help or speak to the cop.

More good advice from Sashi, she's kind of like a Wiseman herself, lots of pep talks from her. Very good scene between Sashi and Penn. She didn't even wanna talk about Boone behind his back, that would've been easy to do but nope!

Why did Rippen have to use the pliers to to fix the lamp below the screen... by his crotch? With loud cranking!? Come on, you know that had to look a bit sus right?

Boone was ready to square up against Rippen so fast, if it wasn't for the fact he was a genie, I believe it would have been over for the poor villain. Boone seems tough he's just a bit cowardly, which is fine! Rippen is too! Too bad sass and pettiness got to Boone from a moody Rippen, an adult man.

To think, Sashi almost died because of Penn... as a monkey.

We adore Boone being difficult towards Rippen either on purpose or not! Gets worse for old Rip, Boone and Larry start to bond over baby nickels! Rippen is too much for me right now, I'm dying of laughter.

Do one of th bikers laugh at Penn's carpet and say "it's small"? I think so.

WILHELM SCREAM! Also Penn killed 3 bikers... not even a joke or a possibility that they survived. Nope! He got them, they're dead! Larry could've almost died we don't know, he blasted off to who knows where.

Awww, Boone being the team's anchor! Sounds mean at first but Penn brought it around. And putting a hand on Boone? I love them. I cherish this dream team. Too bad Rippen's gotta be a problem.

Boone? It's big brain time. Legit one of my favorite episode endings, he's so clever! He so easily manipulates Rippen and uses his own desires against him, even if that's not part of his mission! Great job, Boone! Everyone, clap for Boone! Just so subtlety twisting his words from "annihilate Penn Zero" to "I wish you would make Penn Zero expire", of course Rippen will say exactly what Boone said because he learned he needed to be so damn carful with his words like with the GPS and wanting peace and quiet! I feel bad for Penn, he must have felt so terrified at first. BUT HE TRUSTED HIM! And all that happened was him turning into expired milk! EVERYONE CLAP HARDER! Rippen just being like: alright kill him for real and Boone is like, nah, you already used all your wishes. Go cry about it, bitch!

And Rippen goes out in the funniest way imaginable! I need to clip this and talk about it forever!

I love Boone. I love this dream team. I cherish all of them. But Boone? This is your day! Shine!

I would have been pissed about the Sultan.

~The Characters~

Penn Zero: A low-blow towards his buddy but obviously some feelings he's had over time. Which understandable, I would be frustrated by that, I have been before. But glad that he felt guilty by that, it's good to be honest with your friends but coming off as a jerk doesn't feel good either. Just need to sit down and properly talk about stuff like that.

Boone Wiseman: Like what I said earlier, the ending was awesome, Boone, your a genius! But before that, the break up, I really felt for him, Like I said, it would crush me if my friend said that and that was my whole family's thing. Even though, technically we don't know that yet and sadly don't get that much attention as Sashi's family dynamic. Happy it all turned out right in the end and not in a way where it's like, why are you still friends. It's easy to mess that up.

Sashi Kobayashi: Sage advice from the non-wiseman, that's kinda been her role so far besides the bloodthirsty Sidekick.

Rippen: So damn funny! Like, I died. His raising anger and frustration is so good! The ending? Biggest and funniest L so far!

Larry: Not much to do but funny. This starts a good friendship between Boone and Larry, their bot so different the two.

Dimension(s): Desert... that's it. But the concept of how carpets are just motorbikes is good.

Forms: All great! Especially Genie Boone, I like his pointed ears! Penn's beautiful ponytail and Sashi as a monkey? Adorable. Biker Rippen and Larry ate hard.

[gingerpeachtea]

20 questions for 20 writers !!

ty for the tag @aaronstveit :D <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 13 so far

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 19,163

3. What fandoms do you write for? graceland, braindead, and whatever musicals have crawled into my brain like a parasite and won't leave. i used to write a lot more for aos but i've been slacking </3 daisy johnson i miss u!!!!!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? i already know exactly what these are gonna be lmao

sweet words and fevers (143 kudos, aos, quakerider) lose your faith in me (67 kudos, aos, staticquake) somewhere in the haze (43 kudos, graceland, mike sickfic) wrap it in gauze and light the way home (29 kudos, graceland, mike whump, 10 year anniversary fic :3) if i make it to the morning (28 kudos, graceland, mike/charlie/briggs ot3, mike whump)

5. Do you respond to comments? yes!!!! i looove comments i love talking to people about my fics!!! i love fandom i love community!!! peace and love on planet earth!!!!!!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? out of what i've posted so far, definitely trial by fire, because the point of conflict between mike and paige/their guilt doesn't really get resolved so much as just...they go on with their lives. almost all my fics are hurt/comfort but tbf leans more towards hurt/no comfort. HOWEVERRRRR i do think that once i post something's in your eyes then that will be the angstiest bc i just find the last scene to be really sad

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? not an option for me NEXT! jk it's pillow

8. Do you get hate on fics? naur <3 yay

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? yes. gay👍. if the characters are a man and a woman no they aren't. not to me. also it has to involve some kind of deep psychological issue or else i get bored LMFAO

10. Do you write crossovers? naur

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? not that i'm aware of !

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? nope, but i would absolutely be open to it if someone offered

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? no BUT there is a doc titled MIKEJOHNNY FOREVER where reese (@cemeteryklaus) and i planned out a co-written mikejohnny fic and even started it but she is lost to the depths of my google docs </3

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship? you absolutely cannot make me do this. if there was a gun to my head and u asked me this question i think id just let you shoot me

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? OH GOD. UM. to be so honest........ bus kids existence of all time :( just because SOOO much of it has to be rewritten since i started it YEARS ago and have changed soo much as a writer. i love her so much like that's my BABY that's my actual physical tangible child in a bassinet but....... goddd it's just sm longer than my fics usually are so there's so much to do and so little time </3 and even if i finish it the sequel is definitely not seeing the light of day just bc there's like three missing scenes i still have to write and have 0 ideas for lmao

16. What are your writing strengths? LOOOOOOVE a good metaphor. so sexy so fun to write etc shes my best friend. my silly rabbit. i also think i've gotten really good at showing and not telling :)

17. What are your writing weaknesses? keeping dialogue in character!!! the way i speak irl is so specific and strange and i usually tend to default to my own voice and then i have to go He Would Not Fucking Say That and fix it. also i am so violently indecisive, i usually have 9238642879845 versions of the exact same paragraph or phrase and i can never choose which one i like the most. 70% of the editing process for me is choosing between different versions of something

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? i don't know any other languages so i can't rly do this lmao. i like it tho!!

19. First fandom you wrote for? h*rry p*tter WE DONT HAVE TO TALK ABOUT IT!!!!!

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? FUCK um. okay so like. let me do one per fandom because i am so violently indecisive.

for braindead it's a no-brainer (hehe) it HAS to be when memories snow bc i LOOOOOVE giving characters my very specific issues and writing laurel's recollection of her finding abby's body and writing the last two paragraphs literally felt like unlocking something in my soul it was so much fun!!!

for aos, bkeoat (bus kids existence of all time) is so self-indulgent and every time i read it it's like OGH OGH OGH OGH OOGA BOOGA AWOOGA many consecutive shots to the chest etc etc and so on and so forth. bc i cooked it specifically to have that effect <3 but out of currently posted fics it has to be lyfim <3333 for the same reasons.

for graceland TRIAL BY FIRE!!! i'm so proud of it and it turned out basically exactly how i wanted it to and i just!!! aaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!! HOWEVER something's in your eyes will in fact be tied with it when i post it so. get scared

i don't know 20 writers so i'm just gonna tag a random number of mutuals: @emeraldelysium @dandelion-writes @the-sparkling-diamond-satine @jortspheus @wheelsup-sevenup @acerobbiereyes @cemeteryklaus @saint-ossifrage <3 and anyone else who wants to do this!! :D feel free to tag me if u do!

[thesinglesjukebox]

ZACH BRYAN FT. KACEY MUSGRAVES - "I REMEMBER EVERYTHING"

An old Jukebox fave meets a new country darling we apparently also kinda like...

[6.57]

Nortey Dowuona: There are 3 white men I trust. Zach Bryan is one of them. Mainly because he doesn't attempt to append holier than thou posturing for internet brownie point, beg for bigots approval to make his crashing career successful or fuck around making bad Jeremih songs to appear ahead of the curve. He just writes honest, sincere songs about being a deeply flawed man who is consistently putting himself out there to be loved and to love back, despite the consequences or the punishment of pain, shame, loneliness, failure. Kacey thrives in the midst of these moments and within the turmoil, making a home for herself alongside him, despite it coming apart at the seams due to the aforementioned flaws. And as they sing the final chorus together, you feel the strained, flickering love that is leaning and diminishing, only one breath away from being extinguished. [8]

Jonathan Bradley: Imagine Zach Bryan two decades ago: this ex-military ne'er-do-well recording lo-fi country ballads on his lonesome out in Oklahoma would have been signed to Lost Highway and then lost in the thickets of Paste write-ups. Now he's number one on Billboard. Times change, but so do the hooks, and Bryan has landed on a good one, the way he and Kacey Musgraves wail "you only smile like that when you're drinking," lovelorn and desolate together. Bryan is a folk singer of negative space; he illuminates his glowing little melodies while the song surrounding him lives in that vast blackness stretching into the great plains beyond. [9]

Alfred Soto: Zach Bryan writes about blasted, blighted lives, and his workaday conviction elevates the occasionally staid material. Rotgut whiskey and Kacey Musgraves can't ease his mind. So he dwells in the shadow of memory. [6]

Michael Hong: Bryan's gruffness sounds great on his plain arrangements, but the thinness of Musgraves' voice on her solo take of the chorus makes the whole track feel stiff. The real gem off his self-titled album is with Sierra Ferrell, the plainness making their harmonies and its melodic simplicity shine. [4]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: I'll be honest: the first several times I only listened to this for Kacey Musgraves. The more I hear "I Remember Everything," however, the more I see how Kacey's diaphanous, hazy delivery only works because of how Bryan acts as a brusk, grounded foil. He seems like a perfectly pleasant, reclusive, well-therapized man, one who has earned the moment in the sun he's experienced this year. [7]

Ian Mathers: It is kind of wild to think that this guy is considered the same basic genre (and has hits on the same charts) as that Morgan Wallen fuck; chunks of this are not that far away from, say, Damien Jurado. I'm sure it's not Bryan's only mode (he put out a fucking triple album, for god's sake), but it works here. [7]

Thomas Inskeep: The music on the verses (especially the first) almost sounds like it's being played at the wrong speed? And what's with Bryan's mush-mouthed singing voice? Not to mention that this doesn't sounds like the duet it should be, just two singer's verses spliced together. I'd love to like this, but not much about it works for me. [4]

Leah Isobel: "I Remember Everything" is approximately two steps away from Pity Sex; even its flashes of humor bend toward flowery emo sentiment ("You're like concrete feet in the summer heat/ It burns like hell when two soles meet"). It's fertile ground, but the weepy arrangement and Zach's whimpery, crackling vocal oversell it a bit. [6]

Katherine St Asaph: Three things elevate "I Remember Everything" from the staid "see, this is real country music" ballads that it's not far off from. Zach Bryan's songwriting is carefully observed, and his muted voice suggests a low emotional ceiling -- making it extra powerful when he rips through it. And in turn Kacey Musgraves' voice, while still youthful and winning, is maturing nicely into a less tremulous Emmylou or Dolly. [8]

Hannah Jocelyn: There's this slightly late guitar strum at 1:34 (and again at 3:03) that's annoyed me all year, and I have to point it out because nobody else has. Otherwise, this is an above-average Civil Wars song with some pretty 7/4 verses, marred by a rushed production job -- the arrangement aims for gravitas, but you need lush Daniel Lanois or Gary Pacsoza production for that, not first-take-best-take performances. Yet if it's Zach Bryan or Noah Kahan, I'm taking Bryan every time. [6]

John S. Quinn-Puerta: Between this and Noah Kahan's ascendancy I'm convinced that folk and country will make it 2013 again through science or magic. If it means more duets, I'll take it! [8]

Tara Hillegeist: Soulful melancholy over gentle strumming meant to put the emphasis on the observed detail, the folksy reminiscences, of the singer's well-waxed lyricism is as much a posture as the cocksure drunkard's swagger, where country's concerned; it all comes down to whether you can back the pose up with a sincere enough delivery to match. Good thing Bryan has a voice like an old train engine run hard off homemade distillations, instead of something studio-smooth and syrupy-slick; it sells the vibe almost as well as the images his lyrics conjure up can manage, all by themselves. Musgraves' lighter touch doesn't shift the tenor of the piece so much as add another tone to the portrait being sonically painted; the flecks of sunlight and gold, coming in through the glass bottle you can all but hear, sitting not far from Bryan's hand. Indeed, she's the one to shed a little needed light on one of those ironic details that can give the rest of a song the kind of wry, bittersweet bite it needs to go down feelingly. For all that the song is a story told by Bryan's narrator, it's Musgraves' girl that's remembered early, lyrically, as the better tale-spinner of the two. So, naturally, when it's her turn on the verse, it comes out that the one time Bryan's narrator went so far as to imagine up a future between the two of them, she already knew he couldn't really mean it. A less controlled song would've found a moment to resolve that tension before it ended; "I Remember Everything" simply lingers in the revelation, and the melancholy, and the might've-beens, till the sun comes up and the unwise urge to do more than live with it passes. [8]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: He's just some guy, which is the point. And this is stately, well-struck, and a little bit boring -- "Dawns" did it better, and not just because Maggie Rogers is a much better fit within the Zach Bryan sonic universe -- but I still find it charming even through all of the tedious talk of authenticity and roots rock stardom. Much like everything he's done, "I Remember Everything" is self-conscious of Zach Bryan's place in the world -- the lyric is all lived-in small town signifiers, less a narrative or even a "Don't You Want Me" style point-counterpoint and more a slice of life, but everything else aims for grandeur. Kacey Musgraves is perhaps the crux of "I Remember Everything" -- unlike the rest of the guests (The Lumineers and a bunch of guys that sound like The Lumineers) on Zach Bryan by Zach Bryan, she's (a) made interesting music herself and (b) grappled with that same lyrical/musical divide in her own work. And yet the slight distance in her performance is what ultimately consigns the song to being an interesting curio rather than a barn-burner: the two sketch slightly different frames on the same moment, Musgraves remembering but Bryan desperately asking to be remembered. [6]

Brad Shoup: Maybe it's the sand or the "grown men don't cry" bit, but this feels like Bryan's Lana Del Rey homage: I'm kinda surprised the violins weren't boosted about 25%, or that the drummer didn't try something more martial. As soon as I realized we were getting a boy-girl duet about slugging down whiskey, I thought about Paisley/Krauss. But Bryan's not interested in that kind of operatic tragedy. He's more glum than maudlin, fiddling with the memory of a truck like the screwcap on some Kentucky Gentleman. Musgraves is the voice of reason, or maybe just exasperation; she can't caress the melody alongside Bryan because that would be commiseration. [5]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox ]

[chelleztjs18]

Hello you mrs. honey nut cheerio lefty eyebag who likes to eat pineapple on their pizza 😅

No no, my first one follows you. So you'll see my first account on your list of followers 🤔 but I post the incorrect quotes on the second one. I hope mine are funny.

This one blog with incorrect quotes, I see them post and use sources from like other shows or movies. I want to do some of mine like that. So maybe you will see mine pop up one day 😁

I think I haven't drank anything when it's new years eve. My friend and I would always plan something but then we change our minds and just do something else hahaha

Hahahahaha you slept during a movie??? Were you at the theater? Cause that would be a waste of money 😂 I'm the same way with Jurassic Park! I didn't mind the movies, but I just don't get the hype about dinosaurs. I haven't even watched the new ones with Chris Pratt. My best friend loves it though, but I am glad she didn't invite me to watch them.

You're such a goose. You even said 3 movies...then you listed 4! What am I gonna do with you.

But I love Rachel Weisz in The Mummy. She really was cute that time. And Iron Man 2 with Natasha..oof the scene when she enters the boxing ring 🥵

For my list, I am just going to give you the American shows/movies because there's a lot of filipino shows/movies that I would list but I don't remember their titles. I can remember the scenes but that's it 😅

1. Smallville - the scene when Lana Lang was all bad and was talking to Clark at the school pool area..

2. The Notebook - i love Rachel McAdams. She was so cute and her voice was so soft

3. Honey

Alright, 3 animated movies that you love.

-CuriousGeorge

Hi hi hi curious corn-punn!

Sorry for the late reply. How r u? How was ur last day of 2022? Also happy new year! I hope u had a good time. 😊🥳

Ah i see. So ur second tumblr wont show up on my folower's list? Im really curious now.. so far u have been funny n make me laugh since i talk with u. So im sure ur incorrect quotes will be funny.

What u doin now? R u hanging out with friends?

Haha im surprisef that u never get drunk on new years eve? Do u like to drink? Or u r not a fan of it?

Yes,unfortunately i watched that mocking bird hunger games at the theater. It was actually a waste of money either i fell asleep or not.😅

About the jurassic park movies, i dont mind about the dinosaurs. It was pretty cool cgi n robot stuff. The real reason i dont like the chris pratt's latest jurassic park and the one before it is the story wise.. the one before the latest one, i think it has stupid n bad ending. I meant the little girl push the button to let out the dinos out to human's world just because of sentimental feelings type of crap n risk people's lives all over the world.

Aaand the latest one, kinda show the aftermath of the stupid decission but i think doesnt really show the solutions of it, dinosaurs still roaming around n human r forced to co-inhabitate the earth. N the trailer kinda misleading as if the aftermath n might be resolved but in the movie they r more focus about something else, which are mutated giant freaking grasshoper. Ugh it's so horrible...i even got upset after the movie done n felt like my almost 3hours of life was wasted. 😅 sorry if i sound upset. I wasnt,i was just tellimg u how i felt that time 🤣

Haha yeah, i told u im generous n kind.lol. giving is one of my love language.😅

What r u gonna do with me? Just keep talking with me n dont stop if one day u already let me know who u r. 😊

Oh yeah rachel weisz in that movie looks so much better than the first mummy movie.. i was dissapointed that they didnt pick her in the third movie. She looks so bad ass on the mummy returns. N that accent, oh gosh.. i love accents..it's my weakness..women with accent r hot.🥵

N yeeess natasha in the boxing ring was so bad ass n hot even though i dont really like the black widow's hair on that one though but she still look god damn hot.😅

To be honest i dont know all of the movies that u gave me on this list 😆

But i saw that u like rachel mc adam too, so i bet u have watched Disobedience movie with rachel weisz and r. Mcadams?

Oh gosh another question with hard to pick answer.😅

1. Brave

2. Sing 2

3. All minions movies..😆

I would give u more than 3 but i'm tipsy so i cant really remember the movies right now 😅

Next question?

Cheerio! (Not the cereal one(

[wandringbark]

i’m so frustrated lol i’m sorry i just have to write this down and post into the void and i’m sorry i can’t find page break on mobile but

my sister has been through some really hard shit this year and i’ve been there for her—and my moms been there for her—as much as we possibly could, more than we possibly could, while fighting our own battles these last six months. it’s not that we’re expecting like… i dunno, like that’s just what you do for people you love. but its so frustrating because she just doesn’t see the good things, she only sees faults, even when we’re trying our best. and we’re treating that with all the care we can, again, we understand that she’s been through shit and she’s gonna act in ways that are frustrating. but that doesn’t negate the frustration, you know? our family isn’t perfect and absolutely nothing is gonna make christmas perfect like it used to be in 2002. of course it felt like everyone was more present, because everyone could be more present in 2002. i don’t know, that’s not even the point. i’m just trying so so so hard to make things better and act as an intermediary and i’m still evil and she still hates me. like, ok. cool. please take the computer i got you for graduation and the endless mediation of discussions and fights and staying up til 4:30 last night and getting everything taken care of and the two graduation lunches and the 300 i paid to move you out last minute and my first fucking car that i’m offering to give and all that despite the fact that i’m barely monetarily surviving—please take all that as like. tokens of how much i apparently don’t care about you. and okay. like, i get it!!! i understand why she’s acting like this! i get it!!!!!!! and it’s almost that that makes it hurt the most. idk, like. i understand that pain makes you act like this. and i’m hurting too but i can’t say anything about it. and i understand that. i understand all of it. but that doesn’t make the hurt go away not matter what i do. and then i feel selfish for feeling hurt. i just wanna sleep. but if i sleep or she catches me on my phone again when she gets out of the shower i’ll be the bad guy again. i just wanna go to work honest to god. ill run the library as a one man show if you let me go in rn

[gallusrostromegalus]

Hello, I love you. It is such a blessing to have readers like you.

1. The Postmaster-General pun came to me at like 3 AM and I was delighted at how well it explained both Yamamoto's competence at running an executive organization, but not a government and how a guy with no clan backing rallied an army and funds- Yamamoto got attacked as a postman by the clans, lost his patience, very literally went postal, and convinced his fellow postmen to join him.

Tsubaki is his first and only, and his deepest regret is fucking that up. Not just because she was the only person he ever experienced romantic love for, but in more practical terms, she was his co-commander, chief diplomat, sounding board and tbh did her honest half of the work founding and running soul society.

2. The Shihoin cat shape-shifting is an inherited trait- the Shihoin are cat people like Komamura is a wolf-person, but they all got cursed for poor behavior and largely lost the ability to use their cat forms and powers. The forbidden Kido Chika experimented with is them essentially prying up loose corners of the curse to get some of their abilities back. It's forbidden because it's a great way to piss off the Gods.

3. Kinroku is like if Capone had gotten operation paperclipped, and was instead consulted for his expertise in running a criminal organization to make the FBI better at enforcing the law. Kinroku is a man who knows what side his bread is buttered on, and makes the third division an incredible force against corruption. Honestly, he drafted most of the laws soul society operates under which is part of the reason it functioned as well as it did for so long. Definitely Yamamoto's beat hire.

4. Chigiri and Yachiru were friends before either of them got arrested because combat people need good medics and early medical research needed access to a lot of corpses to study. They've been friends for a long, long time.

5. Danjiro is 100% a have a beer and chill and very sympathetic to the poor kinda guy, and his big achievement as captain was getting major roads built all the way into the outermost districts, partly so the Gotei-13 could deploy At Speed and deal with warlords and hollows and wildfires etc. But once in place, the roads also served to level the economic playing field for a lot of the outer districts, opened up trade and really improved the overall quality of life for most people.

6. SHE SURE FUCKIN' DID. The Kuchiki hate to admit it, but the legendary speed and power of the Kuchiki captains all comes from her. She was such a robust and lively person she more or less saved the clan from genetic meltdown for almost a millennium.

7. Nobotsuna is a Kido master but more importantly, despite appearances he's quite a gentle soul and almost never gets truly angry or alarmed by other people's antics, so he's the IDEAL guy to have a chief psychopomp in a place where sometimes there are powerful and angry souls in line. Nobotsuna is such a weirdo he can match anyone's energy and then walk them back down, and he's such a goof he can make even the most frightened souls giggle.

8. Batsu'unsai however, was very much the administrative arm of the Kido Union and her skills as a financier ported over directly. She was also Not Above using her cleavage to distract people into signing on to agreements that were not necessarily in their best interests. I sorta ship her, Uhin and Nobotsuna in a poly triangle.

9. Entetsu takes a little while to come out of his shell properly, but the thing about him is that Entetsu used to be a travelling folk singer/handyman/rover and He Knows A Guy. Anything you might need done, he knows someone who is an expert at it, because he's travelled so much and met so many people and impressed them with his staunch ethics and beautiful voice that he can call them up and have them here tomorrow to fix this. He was the one to introduce Tsubaki to the rest of the dirty dozen, because he'd met her at the races last year, and she clearly knows How To Organize Things.

10. Otogawa does seem like a strange choice for any sort of commander given his terrible impulse control but: note that he invented a negative pressure pump. He's actually a genius but has the benign and near-sighted worldveiw of a lightly concussed duckling. A very Leonard of Quirm kinda guy, if you've ever read discworld. Otogawa got to be in charge of monitoring the living world because he was the guy who developed the first stable and reliable portals to and from the living world, as well as the technology to track the appearance of hollows when they emerge from the appendix dimension Las Noches is in.

11. Unohana is... A major natural disaster in her own right, yes, but she's not stupid. She's quite smart but uneducated and has ADHD so a moment of boredom can turn into a black depression in minutes so she's THRILLED to have the structure of marching orders and Yamamoto constantly giving her new things to play with.

To answer a timeline question someone else had: she had severely damaged her left lung in battle (possibly against Askin?), which is how the authorities were able to catch her in the first place. Chigiri is largely able to heal it... But listen Girl. If something happens to your left lung again, we're going to have to remove the whole thing and that'll fuck up your ability to fight so LEARN TO BLOCK.

And she does! She also learns how to read and command and do her own first aid and get pickier about her opponents and it goes really well until about a century later, when she's getting bored and is out quelling bandit activity in North 80 and unexpectedly gets into the fight of her life...

12. Uhin and Kinroku rapidly become friends through the shared commiserating of "I wouldn't be a gangster if the government actually worked". Also, every army ever in history steals each other's supplies. It's a good way to keep costs down AND fuck up your enemies. Amateurs think tactics, but wars are won and lost on Logistics. Uhin also was the co-commander of Danjiro's roadways project, and quite the gastronome, and passed the tradition of "good food, and lots of it" down to other 12th division captains, though this sometimes manifests in strange ways.

13. Actually I was thinking Sakahone smote that clan for trafficking, but I like your idea of "death cult" too- no reason it can't be both! Sakahone is a Kido guy first and foremost, and between his ridiculous power and the way he keeps failing to die means many of the others suspected that he was some kind of minor god that decided to get married and take up farming. Sakahone manages to live for an appallingly long time, all the way to his 2,222nd birthday before deciding he'd had enough and ended the short war with the Quincy in the 1800's by handing the post to his lieutenant, Jushiro Ukitake, and then exploding. Despite having two captains that look like they're on the verge of death, the 13th actually has some of the lowest employee turnover.

So, how exactly was the Gotei 13 formed in AEIWAM?

(The original gotei-13 captains might have canon genders but I'm going off vibes tbh.) (Here's a collection of Kubo's art of the original 13 so you can see what everyone looks like)

-----

It had started with the Clans.

Actually, it had started when Shigekuni Yamamoto was mugged for the fourth time in as many days, by agents of The Great Noble Houses, trying to influence the tide of their endless petty wars. You could hardly blame him for reacting as he did, somewhat literally blowing up with rage, and upon his return to his home office, rallying his fellow distraught men into a fighting force to stand up to the clans.

It had been quite a popular manuver for him, with the equally distraught and downtrodden citizens of the central rukongai threw their support behind him in short order. He was already well-known to them, and respected for his work. In a few short years, his meager forces had grown to rival the clans in power.

Then the Quincies had invaded the Spirit World, lead by some horrible creature known as Yhwach, seemingly Hell-Bent on conquest- which is where all of them would end up if The Archery Bastards kept shooting everything that moved and upended the balance between the worlds.

Now-General Shigekuni Yamamoto, the unfortunate bastard to whom the task of defending the largest city in the Spirit world from invasion had fallen, needed some muscle.

Why me, of all people? Surely there were others more qualified? He wondered, staring at the latest round of reports from the meager handful of his men that remained. Or perhaps everyone smart enough to actually do this is also smart enough to realize it was a lost cause and had thrown their lot in with one of the Noble Houses, and I am on a fool's errand.

Even just a handful of warriors with sufficient strength could break the leading edge of the Quincy line, and let the small army that remained slip behind them in to cut the Quincies off from their supply lines. It was just that breaking the wall of archers required at least a dozen of him.

"Word from lieutenant Sasakibe!" Shouted one of his soldiers, sprinting in the door and thrusting a letter at him. "Sorry sir I just remembered how important it was that you heard from him as soon as possible."

"You did as I asked." Yamamoto nodded, opening the letter. He had needed to stay- both to recover from his injuries and because if the Quincy got much closer, using Ryujin jakka to create a wall of fire around the city might be the only way to hold them off- and he had tasked Chojiro Sasakibe, his Longest and Dearest friend, with finding him the strongest warriors in Soul Society.

He took the scroll and opened it, reading the neat but excitably slanted handwriting within-

Dearest Shigekuni,

I am relieved to report I have found a dozen extremely powerful warriors per your request! I went on a hunch a friend of mine had, and found a concentration of MANY powerful warriors that would be willing to aid our cause, but twelve among them are particularly standout candidates. Given the rapid advance of the Quincy Army, I have included a teleportation spell to their location at the end of this scroll so you may meet them immediately.

"Incredible!" Yamamoto laughed. "Is there nothing this man cannot do?"

I do beg of you though- Please, reserve your judgement of them until you have seen their capacity.

"Ah." Yamamoto sighed. "...of course there's a catch."

Their circumstances are... complex, and this has made many of them rough and peculiar to speak to, but I swear we will not find better warriors, at least not before the Quincy advance reaches Seireitei.

I await your arrival, Chojiro

Yamamoto unfurled the scroll a bit more to see the edge of the teleportation spell that would activate when exposed to sunlight. "Sir?" asked the young soldier.

"It seems Sasakibe was successful in finding me the assistance we need, but they are apparently a queer lot." Yamamoto rumbled, thinking. "There is a teleportation spell- How close did you say the Advance was?"

"Not more than a week out, sir."

"Hopefully less than two hours then." he grunted, standing up and carrying the scroll to the courtyard of the building he operated from- it was a place used to the many comings and goings of a large and complex organization, though the little Shrine to the God of Messages and messengers had been somewhat neglected of late. Yamamoto took a moment to sweep the leaves out of the shrine and bowed to the statue within, thanking it for delivering Sasakibe's message and asking for help delivering him to his friend.

"Any orders while you're away, Sir?" The soldier asked.

"Someone clean out that shrine and make it a proper offering. The last thing we need is for communications to go down." The General nodded.

"Yes Sir!" the soldier saluted.

Yamamoto unfurled the scroll and with a flash, vanished from the courtyard.

---

With the same flash, he appeared somewhere... foggy.

"Shigekuni?" a familiarly crisp voice asked somewhere in the ether.

"Chojiro?" Yamamoto called back, and the vague shape that might have been a rock in front of him stood up, arms open. He laughed, and embraced his friend. "Good job! How did you find them so fast?"

Sasakibe's warm smile suddenly stiffened into a grimace. "...Promise you will not be angry?"

"Chojiro?" Yamamoto frowned.

"See, I was asking my friends- only the most trusted of them, I swear- how to even go about finding warriors with everything scattered to the wind of late, and well- One of them suggested that only things that are powerful are widely feared, so look where fearsome things are to find powerful ones."

Yamamoto squinted at his friend, then around them at the dense fog, the strange rocky cliff beside them, and the distant sound of angry voices.

"Chojiro." Yamamoto asked, hands on his shoulders. "Where are we?"

Sasakibe pointed up behind Yamamoto where characters had been carved into the stone cliff.

The Nest Of Maggots

"Chojiro."

"Yes, sir?"

"This is a prison."

"Yes, sir."

"This is a prison for the kind of filth that even the most bitterly factious clans agree is a danger to have wandering around. The kind that they already tried and failed to weaponize against each other. This is a prison for Monsters."

"...Yes, sir." Sasakibe sighed. "-But, is is not monsters we need?"

Yamamoto was silent for a time, thinking of the swathes of pointless destruction- salted fields and burnt villages- of the senseless loss of life- slaughtering soldier and civilian alike down to the last man, woman and child- of the cruel and twisted powers of the chosen favorites of Yhwach.

"Monsters to fight monsters." He shook his head. "What is this world coming to?" Yamamoto sighed.

Sasakibe looked away, unable to meet his friend's gaze. "Still, beggars can't be choosers." Yamamoto nodded. "Show them to me."

--- All twelve "Most Dangerous" of The Nest's prisoners had been herded together into something approximating a straight line in the middle of the rocky cavern that housed the prisoners here, though some of them were already beginning to meander, and one woman near the end of the line had, rather rudely, decided to remain seated in Yamamoto's presence. The lineup was... less than impressive. Two of the women looked like they belonged on pinup posters rather than death row. One of the men looked like a washed-up Sumo, another like an ashtray that had been cursed to roam the afterlife as a human. On one end of the line was an ancient and decrepit old man, and on the other was a- Yamamoto wasn't actually sure if they were a man or a woman, but in another life, they had definitely been a cat.

"These are the most powerful fighters in the Spirit World?"  He muttered to Chojiro.

"These are the most still-alive-est fighters in the Spirit World." Chojiro clarified.

"...Fuck it. " Yamamoto sighed under his breath, before stepping forward and addressing them properly.

"I am General Shigekuni Yamamoto of The Seireitei. I don't know how long you've been in this hole-" Yamamoto paused, sensing that something was off.

None of the Prisoners were looking at him. In fact, the all seemed very dedicated to looking everywhere but at him. Some were inspecting the stalactites, others were examining the grit on the cave floor, or staring into the metaphysical abyss somewhere just over his shoulder, and one man had pulled his very silly straw hat down in front of his face.

"-Alright, what the hell is going on?" Yamamoto growled.

There was a general unenthusiastic sort of shuffling and a distinct lack of answers.

"Remember everyone!" The man next to the cat-in-human-form spoke up while examining his fingernails. He looked more like an accountant than someone who belonged on Death Row, but the others perked up and paid attention. "-We are not to speak to any guards of visitors until our representative arrives and has given us permission to do so." The others nodded and resumed looking anywhere but at Yamamoto.

"...Representative?" Sasakibe lightly growled at a guard, whose complexion went from 'ashen' to 'deathly'.

"They um. Well. They've gotten rather close to one of the other prisoners, but she's no good in a fight, so we left her-" The Guard sputtered under Sasakibe's withering glare.

"-Miss Tsubaki was waiting at the Primary gate last I saw her." continued the man who looked like an accountant and that Yamamoto was becoming increasingly sure was armed, despite allegedly having been searched and denied any tools in his confinement. "...I say to no-one in particular." He added.

There was a moment of silence.

Yamamoto struck the tired-looking, gray-haired young woman beside the accountant, sending her stumbling back, but the accountant and the sturdily-built blonde man beside her stepped in to catch her, the rest of the line snapping to attention, eyes fixed on him with utter rage.

"Now that I have your attention-" Yamamoto started again, the gray-haired woman coughing as the sturdy blonde helped her back to her feet. "-As I was saying, the Spirit World is being invaded, and you're all being conscripted to-"

"Yachiru!" Snapped a young woman behind them.

Yamamoto turned to glare at the interloper, but instead found that the gaunt-looking woman that had remained seated had somehow apparently teleported and tackled Sasakibe to the wall behind them, one arm pressed to his throat, slowly choking him. Apparently-Yachiru's other hand had put some substantial holes in his abdomen and she paused from where she was about to stark licking Sasakibe's blood off her fingers to look at who had spoken.

"Don't eat that! You don't know where it's been!" Said a waifish young woman in threadbare prisoner's robes who could not have been taller than 4'10". She was quite striking, with large, dark eyes, sharp cheekbones, and a long aquiline nose. She took Yachiru's bloodied hand and dragged her back to the group. Yamamoto tried to keep his pace even as he walked over to check on Sasakibe, who immediately sat up and waved him off.

"...Thirsty." Grunted Yachiru- She might also have been beautiful, with her pale, round face and smooth black hair, were it not for the haunted, carnivorous look in her eye and her apparently literal bloodthirst. She stopped halfway back to the group to give a wet, hacking cough that made Yamamoto's skin crawl, and spat out a gob of bloody phlegm on the floor.

"You'll feel better when you get Minazuki back." the young woman reassured her, helping Yachiru sit back down, the others taking seats on the stone floor as well, in two neat lines behind her, the Human Cat behind one shoulder, the Accountant behind the other. "Is everyone else alright?"

"Kinroku definitely did not tell the guards to go get you." announced the man from behind his straw hat. "Also the mean old man hit Chigiri."

"I understand. Do you need assistance, Chigiri?

"The Old Goat has a sucker-punch like a rocket but I'll live." grunted Chigri, rubbing her abdomen and waving her hand interrogatively at Yachiru, who shrugged in reply.

"Despicable Behavior, hitting a medic." the human ashtray sniffed disapprovingly. Yamamoto could feel the Reiatsu of the group now, previously held in check, now starting to unfurl and growl and snarl at him.

"You BASTARDS-!" Yamamoto snarled, lunging towards the young woman, who instinctively made a fist in front of her chest, grabbed it with her other hand, and swung her whole body around, slamming her elbow into his eye socket and nose, and he stumbled, falling to his knees. It wasn't that hard a hit, not compared to what he was used to, but there was genuine killing intent behind it, much like the heel she struck into the side of his head, knocking him over the rest of the way in surprise. Miss Tsubaki's large, dark eyes were full of rage as she glared down at him, grinding his head into the floor under her toes. "Ah." He said, finally recognizing her from images in the intermittent news bulletins. Tsubaki was a middle daughter of one of the most powerful of the Noble Houses who had suddenly vanished from public view the year before. The rumor was that she had been imprisoned by her father for dangerous activities like 'Going Places' and 'Writing Letters' or even 'Having Opinions'. It was apparently true, but if she'd managed to organize the dirtiest dozen of the Maggot's Nest, he was beginning to understand her father's choice of internment. "Miss Tsunayashiro, I presume."

"I am her, and I am here in my capacity as their Union Representative. This means you do not talk to them. You talk to me." She lightly snarled, removing her surprisingly sharp-heeled foot from his temple and sitting seiza in front of the group. "Now what is it that you have brought us here to discuss?"

"Your friends are getting conscripted." he glared, slowly getting up and standing to address her. Returning the blow to a civilan, no matter who her family was or how hard she hit, was beneath either of their dignity, but a little looming was alright.

"We're getting hired." She corrected him. "With proper contracts and compensation."

"Shut up or else." He snarled, reconsidering the value of his dignity.

"...Or else what, exactly?" She asked.

Yamamoto bristled, and slowly drew his sword. Tsunayashiro's gaze flicked to the blade, following it's gleam as he brought it up to her throat, tipping her chin up with the point. "-Or you will all die right here." Tsubaki closed her eyes, sighed deeply and opened them again, gaze fixed on his. He could feel her pulse through Ryujin Jakka's blade.

...Steady as a rock.

"Alright." She spoke evenly. "Strike me down."

Yamamoto blinked.

"We are already on Death Row, General." She explained slowly as though speaking to an idiot. "None of us have families to speak of, or to speak to, for you to threaten. We're already cold and barely allowed to sleep and starving and in constant pain from broken bones or missing organs or untreated injuries. We are all already doomed to die or suffer gross abasement. You, however-"

She slowly stood up, neck sliding a bit on Ryujin Jakka's blade, drawing a trickle of blood.

"-I've been in here for the better part of a year, I believe, but news trickles in. Guards leave to replace soldiers fallen on the battlefield. Rations dwindle as farmland is overrun or destroyed. Political prisoners are freed and returned home as more popular heirs and scions are killed. You, General Shigekuini Yamamoto, need help with this war, and need it badly, to come here for it." Tsubaki continued, stepping forward and pressing a bit more into the blade, the trickle running more strongly, down her throat and into the folds of her thin Yukakta, staining the fabric bright red.

"So go on. Strike us down." She spoke softly. "Spare us the Humiliation of a Public execution or the horrors of a lobotomy, and doom yourself."

Yamamoto, quite possibly for the first time in his life, hesitated.

"If you cannot do that, sit down and negotiate like a civilized person." She said. The blood stained her entire breast now, but she did not flinch or waver.

Slowly, glaring and refusing to break eye contact, he withdrew his blade, wiped it down and sheathed it. Teeth gritted and heart unexpectedly racing, he sat. Lady Tsunayashiro followed, head still held high, though that may have been so Chigiri could lean forward and press a pad of torn robe to her throat, stemming the bleeding as she bandaged it, muttering curses.

"We're being invaded by an army of mutant humans called "Quincy" who can shoot arrows made of pure reishi, which can obliterate a soul entirely. They're lead by some monster called Yhwach, who seems hell-bent on conquering the entirety of the Living and Spirit worlds, and is apparently capable of killing small gods and Kami." Yamamoto explained, trying to stress the depth of the situation. He'd never been in a labor negotiation before, and was hoping they'd be more reasonable if he made an emotional appeal. "Kill enough of the archery bastards and live, and I'll have all your crimes pardoned."

"What a shame, what a shame." clucked the old man at the far end of the lines. "You young people just don't know how to handle things..."

"Hmmm..." The person who was definitely at least spiritually a cat pursed their lips. "Oh, uh- Chika Shihon." the bowed their head. "-It's a good start, but I'm gonna need a hell of a payday, seeing as nobody will hire an ex-criminal, even a pardoned one, and about forty more people need to die before my family will consider taking me back in."

"As well as some form of protection from political reprisals, or there won't be an opportunity to spend any of that payday." said Kinroku the Accountant, rubbing his nose like he was going to push up a pair of glasses he wasn't wearing.

"Paying criminals? Surely, you can't be serious!" Sasakibe scoffed.

"I am serious, and my name is Tsubaki, not Shirley." The representative quietly smirked at him. "Well, General? What price are you willing to offer for the salvation of all of Soul Society?"

"I want to see some proof before we talk price." Yamamoto glared at the Death Row From The Dumpster before him.

"Fair enough." Nodded Tsubaki, turning her head to address the group. "After me, who would you all say is the weakest fighter?"

The group considered this for a moment.

"Strongest is easy, its Yachiru, even with the missing lung." waved the pinup girl with the eyepatch and pigtails.

"Give Uhin some credit!" Protested the other pinup girl with the tits that were individually larger than her head.

"That's sweet of you to say Batsu-" Uhin the Giant in the back row laughed, patting the second girl's head. "-But also holy shit, no. Yachiru could disembowel me and strangle me with my own intestines before I could get off the mark! No offense little man, but I think it's Furuoki." He said, patting the straw hat of the man in front of him.

"Really?" Tits McGee pondered. "I was going to say Nobutsuna."

"I was gonna say me too." announced the human ashtray with a rough and reedy voice. "I hate fighting." "Yeah, but you hit like a fuckin' rockslide. Yeah, it's Furuoki." Agreed eyepatch.

"Mr. Otogawa-" Tsubaki addressed Furuoki the hat man. "-It's rather dark in here, would you please let in some light?"

Furuoki blinked at her, confused.

"Show the old man you can punch a hole in the ceiling." Yachiru translated for him, wetly.

"Okay!" Furuoki chirped happily, getting up and walking a few feet away.

"MORE!" yelled the group.

"Over by the guard tower!" Encouraged the large and rather jolly looking man, save for how he seemed to have lost both his lips and most of the front of his mouth, but had only bothered to replace his missing teeth with gold ones, giving him a permanent lipless grin.

Furuoki walked over towards the guard tower until the guards approached him and told him to back up, paced a bit until he found a suitable middle ground, and squinted up at the ceiling.

"Sir-" Sighed the head guard walking towards Furuoki as frowned at the ceiling. "Sir that's half a mile of solid rock and twelve different magical wards above you. It's not gonna work."

Furuoki instead dropped down on one knee, aimed, and-

A dazzling blue-green light and a noise like the roaring fires of Hell Itself erupted from his fist as he punched up towards the ceiling, vaporizing the stone above him and making all 12 wards chime and tinkle like glass as he broke through them. As the mushroom cloud of dust dispersed, sunlight began to filter in through the hole, at least 100 feet in diameter. The top third of the Guard tower seemed to have evaporated as well, and the guards were scrambling to try to control the panic.

"Is that enough?" Furuoki called.

"...Is it, General?" miss Tsubaki asked.

"...Ten Thousand Kan?" Yamamoto tried.

"That's fine dear, please come sit back down." Tsubaki waved.

"I am surprised, general." She smiled at Yamamoto in a way that reminded him uncomfortably of they way the post office cat would smile at the mice. "Ten Thousand Kan annually per individual is a very reasonable offer."

"A one-time payment of Ten thousand Kan to be split between the group." he growled.

"No." She shook he head. "You're offering us annual salaries, individually."

"The hell I am."

"Then we will enjoy watching the collapse of civilization through the new Skylight Furuoki made us." She replied, unconcerned. "You may have noticed, General, that there is a war on, and this is an exceptionally safe and secure place to be. Make it worth leaving."

"-Two minutes ago this was a frozen hellhole you were all starving in." he glared.

"Ah, but the view and property value has improved substantially in the last two minutes!" She smiled, unconcerned with his complaints. "There is no punishment you could mete out that is worse than remaining here, General, but you are not an advancing army of superhuman mutants, and there are MANY things the Quincy can do to us that are worse than remaining here. You are in a most unenviable position."

Yamamoto grimaced. "You're sure this is the best there is?" he muttered to Sasakibe.

"We could also try swearing loyalty to one noble house and hoping the other four don't try to kill us before the Quincy do." Sasakibe grunted, hand over the puncture wounds in his guts. "I don't like it either. but I like our other options even less."

Yamamoto sighed. "...Five thousand Kan Annually per individual."

"Ten thousand." replied Tsubaki.

"Seven thousand."

"Ten thousand."

"That's not how this is supposed to go." Yamamoto grumbled.

"And yet, this is how it's going." She smirked. "There is also the matter of the political protections!"

"DAMMIT!"

---

Half an hour later, terms had been reached.

Full pardons, Ten Thousand Kan, annually per individual (plus expenses), and political protections in the form of employing them as commanding officers on the condition that they "-Don't get killed, and prove you're smarter than a sack of hammers and at least half as useful."

"No for real, I'll forgive the old man the gut punch, lemme do something so you're not bleedin' all over my contract?" Chigiri sighed, watching Sasakibe write up the contracts.

"I'll trust my body to keep my guts on the right side of my skin over someone's dirty socks." he sighed. "Or do you have something else on hand?"

"Minazuki." Muttered Yachiru, leaning heavily on Chigiri.

"Oh right! I keep forgetting she does the fish thing." Chigiri perked up. "Yeah tell the guards to go get her sword, it turns into a... fuckin' whatsit, the big flat fish? Turns into one of those that can heal anything."

"Again, I trust my own faculties over any sort of Healing Halibut." Chojiro groaned.

"Stingray." Yachiru muttered, wheezing a bit. "Minazuki is a stingray."

"Alright, back in line everyone- I need you all to confirm your identities and what crimes you need pardoned, and to sign your contracts." Sasakibe sighed, standing up with the contracts and handing the first to Yamamoto.

"Shigekuni Yamamoto, Dereliction of duty and Mail-tampering, among other assorted sins." He said, smirking a bit at his own joke as he took the contract.

"Thank you sir." Sasakibe sighed, shuffling the pile of folders containing the files of the dozen criminals, and stepping up to the first one.

"Chika Shihon-" He read off, matching the drawn portrait to the person in front of him- Chika was a rather handsome young thing, with warm bronze skin and short, soft white hair. It was the gleam in their yellow eyes that made Sasakibe worry. "- Sentenced to lifetime imprisonment or death for staging a clan coup, twelve counts of fratricide and... dabbling in forbidden Kido?"

"Oh, like you've never had a family dinner that got out of control!" Chika huffed, indignant.

"I'm more curious about the Kido, actually." Yamamoto said, peering over his file.

Chika beamed and Sasakibe got as far as a choked "NOT HERE-!" before they vanished in a cloud of smoke. When it cleared, they were still wearing the same excited expression, but now as a small white house cat.

Sasakibe and Yamamoto stared at the cat for a moment, then at each other in a mutual expression of I can't believe we've been reduced to asking these freaks for help.

"Well, when you've got thumbs again, please read your contract, then sign and initial all the indicated areas, and swipe your blood across the bottom." Sasakibe sighed, bending over to hand the kitty their contract. "Remember, these contracts are legally and magically binding. Betray us, and die immediately."

"Next is- Kinroku Izuhara-" Sasakibe was interrupted by one of guards appearing with the confiscated personal belongings of the prisoners, including an entire bundle of swords under his arm.

"I understand not giving us our weapons until the contracts are signed and the seal is placed upon us, but may I have my glasses back?" Kinroku asked, voice crisp and arch. He was certainly the least ragged-looking of the group, his graying hair still neatly trimmed and face clean-shaven.

Yamamoto held out a hand and the guard placed the appropriate glasses in his palm. "Trade you for whatever you have that's kept you so clean-shaven it's making my mustache itch." Yamamoto glared.

Kinroku smirked, and produced a piece of bone that had been exquisitely sharpened into a razor's edge.

"This is a human bone." Yamamoto observed.

"Unfortunately, poorer quality than the bones of pigs or cattle in terms of holding an edge, but it's done it's job." Kinrku nodded.

"...This says you're on death row for ...Tax Evasion?" Sasakibe glared at the file as the blade was traded for the glasses.

"Yes. I made an unfortunate miscalculation regarding the loyalty of my men, so I am glad you are taking adequate precautions." Kinroku muttered, cleaning his glasses on his robe, holding them up to the dim sunlight filtering through the hole, and frowning, disappointed.

"Men?" Yamamoto asked. "You've had experience commanding armed forces before?"

"After a fashion." he said, signing the contract and biting into his thumb to finish the deal. "You've heard of The Vipers of the southern reaches?"

"The decentralized bandit gang that disbanded a few years back? I thought their leader had died?" Sasakibe frowned.

Kinroku smirked at him.

"...Oh, for fuckssake." Sasakibe groaned.

"Chigiri Shijima." Yamamoto read off, having already moved on. "...What the hell kind of charge is Aggravated Medical Research?"

"Can't make an emergency field medicine manual omlette without breaking a few bones. And causing a few disembowelments. And poking out a few eyes." She explained.

Yamamoto slowly arched an eyebrow at her.

"I PUT 'EM ALL BACK!" Chigiri protested. "...Eventually."

"Read. Sign. Blood." Yamamoto sighed, handing her the contract.

"For real though, your man okay? I can have those stitched in under a minute." Chigiri pointed her thumb at Sasakibe.

"That's some fast-acting painkillers." Sasakibe noted.

"What painkillers?" Chigiri asked, genuinely confused.

"...I'll take my chances with the halibut." Sasakibe winced, turning to the next man in line. "Danjiro Obana?"

"Yeah!" Grinned the sturdy-looking blonde man, all smiles and friendliness now that an agreement had been reached. "Lookin' forward to workin' with you guys!"

"...Imprisoned for cannibalism?" Sasakibe asked, horrified.

"IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!" Danjiro hollered, voice echoing around the cavern.

"How do you accidentally consume human flesh?" Yamamoto glared.

"Well- okay it wasn't an 'accident' per se, but look, that Ise Clan guy locked me in the family mausoleum to die, and understandably, I got the munches, and the coffins were fulla, eh... post-sapient jerky?" Danjiro explained. "I really don't know what he expected to happen. Really surprised when he opened up the door a month later and I gut punched his spine out though. I don't regret that one bit."

"You know? That's fair." decided Sasakibe, handing him a contract. "Read, sign, blood."

"Yessir!" Danjiro saluted happily.

"Furufoshi Saito?" Yamamoto asked the young woman with the purple pigtails and eyepatch that was next in line.

"I DID NOT 'KIDNAP' HIM, HE'S MY HUSBAND AND THEY'RE ALL A BUNCH OF PRICKS!" She roared.

Yamamoto blinked at her, then leaned over to read "Accused of Abducting and 'Deflowering' the eldest son of the Kuchiki clan' on her file. "...Care to elaborate on that?"

"I found poor Kyoga-kun half-dead on my doortstep after the battle of River Bo- he still had spears in him, the poor thing! So like a sane and reasonable person I took him in and nursed the sweet thing back to heath and- well, a beautiful man in my bed, grateful to me for saving his life and offering me his eternal love and gratitude- How could a girl resist?" She sighed, hearts in her remaining eye.

"-and since I'd carried him over the threshold into my home we were basically married already, so it wasn't wrong of me to ride him like a pony or violate his warranty like that! He loved it! He loves ME! AND I LOVE HIM! It's just that the rest of the Kuchiki clan are a bunch of snobs with no sense of romance." She sighed, melancholy, then looked up at him, chewing her lip in nervousness. "...You haven't. heard anything about him?"

Yamamoto considered her story, and the few times he'd met Kyoga Kuchiki- a delicate young man with a sense of romantic grandeur and when he'd seen the boy recently, he had been lying facedown on the floor and sobbing, in quite some distress over being separated from his beloved-

"...Daddy Bear?" Yamamoto asked, bewildered.

"MY LITTLE BABY BEAR REMEMBERS ME!" She shrieked with joy, "Is he alright? I've been so worried, he still wasn't over that septic infection and the war keeps getting closer-" She demanded, grabbing Yamamoto by his Kosode and shaking him for answers.

"-As of last month, he was distraught over your absence, but otherwise hale. The sooner the Quincy are dead, the sooner you can see him again. Read, sign, blood." Yamamoto said, detangling himself from her and putting the contract between them.

"Ah, Ever-turbulent but true runs the course of Love." sighed the charred man beside her. "Nobotsuna Shigyo, at your service." he introduced himself, bowing politely.

"I'm Batsu'unsai Katori- We were arrested and imprisoned for roughly the same incident and it may help to be introduced at the same time." Said the woman with the exceptionally large breasts beside him. "Um, I'll need my glasses back too- Oh, thank you!"

"The sight of sunlight is so strange after such time." Mused Nobotsuna. "Even before our imprisonment, the Lady Katori and I were leaders of a secret underground society!"

"It was less of a society and more of a Polycule that got out of control-" Explained Batsu'unsai. "Once I discovered by spiritual powers, I moved in with the great sage Shou Dokutsu, and began hanging out with and then dating other people with spiritual powers and they started bringing their partners to my district and pretty soon there were so many of us that the easiest way to house everyone was to start developing the extensive underground cave systems in the area."

"We manufactured many fine magical artifacts, so called ourselves The Under-Wares!" Said Nobotsuna.

"We actually called ourselves The Kido Union, because in addition to the magical tools, we formed a united labor front to keep the clans from exploiting us." She explained, and Yamamoto began to understand her interruption.

"I am the wise Loremaster of our people!" Said Nobutsuna.

"He's a stablehand." Batsu'unsai smiled.

"But the clans did not like that they were no longer able to exploit and abuse us now that we had allied in great numbers, and war came to our peaceful nation of Shou's Hole!" he said, with genuine sadness.

Yamamoto and Sasakibe looked back at Batsu'unsai.

"It actually is called Shou's Hole." she sighed. "He just wanted it so badly."

"I wore them down!" Notbotsuna grinned.

"Still, the clans did not like that they now had to pay to have magical labor done and that we would outright refuse their more barbaric requests, and eventually I think it was the Shibas that mounted an all-out assault on us. Last I heard, most of the Union made it out through the other exits from the caves, but Dokutsu-san and most of our heavy hitters stayed at the primary entrance to buy time. Nobotsuna and I were the only ones to survive the assault, and Hiraku Shiba had us thrown in here." Batsu'unsai sighed.

"Prick." Spat Nobotsuna. "Oh sure, when a head of one of the so-called 'Noble' houses goes around decapitating people and burning them alive it's considered 'honorable combat' and 'keeping the peace', but when I, a man whose family tree isn't a fucking wreath of incest, retaliates in a decidedly less lethal fashion suddenly its 'treason' and 'making up a spell called Penis Blast is a war crime'!!"

"-What kind of blast?" asked Sasakibe.

"He can demonstrate it for us on The Archery Bastards. Read, sign, blood." Yamamoto said, thrusting contracts at them.

"Entetsu Kumoi." Read off Sasakibe as they came to the bald man who was nearly as wide as he was tall, with the exposed gold teeth. Entetsu looked up from where he'd finished putting his glasses back on and arranged his hairless brows into something that indicated that he'd be smiling politely if he had lips. "Imprisoned for your participation in the riot at the Windroad House, where you..." Sasakibe frowned at the file. "-Attacked and killed one hudred fifty-seven town guards with a brick, and mounted an assault on the local Dyamo?"

"Always morally correct, hittin' cops with bricks." Nodded Entetsu. "-Specially ones comin' t' kill just because some people are out havin' a good time, doin' no harm to no-one."

"The Windroad House is a Bar in the 3rd district famous for it's ah. Exotic. Cabaret performances." Sasakibe explained to Yamamoto, who didn't get out much.

"You were. At one of these performances?' Yamamoto asked.

"Ah, nah- just gotten off the job and had nipped down to the pub across th'way for a pint when I saw the pigs kick in the door an' start dragggin' the ladies out and I thought 'well that ain't right', so I started throwin' bricks until I were on me last brick and then I hunted them down wit' that last brick until there were none left." he explained. "Then I thinks, 'well, there's only none left until more come from the station', so's I made me way up the road to the station wit' me brick and had me a little hogslaughter up there too, see?"

"...And you just. kept going?" Sasakiba asked.

"So's I did! Right up to the head hog's trough, though by then it were well early in the mornin' and I were tired an' had some dozen spears in me back and me brick had fallen apart, so's I dinna get hims haunches fer ham." Entetsu sighed.

"Persistence! Very good quality in a captain!" Grinned Yamamoto, handing him the contract. "You know what to do by now."

They turned to the rather comely young man with the straw hat. "Furuoki, was it?" Yamamoto asked, feeling something that wasn't hopeful, per se, but these were strong people, and deeply insane and they were agreeing to help him, something that made his heart race with a delirious sort of mania.

"Yes. I am Furuoki Otogawa." he nodded.

"-And you're imprisoned here for- ecological terrorism, defiling holy a holy site and creating a dangerous magical device?" Sasakibe asked.

"What?" asked Yachiru, getting back to her feet and leaning heavily on him. "You told me you were in here for Jaywalking?"

"I thought I was?" Said Furuoki, frowning and tipping his head with confusion.

"It says here you constructed a device over the Tenjo no Ganbo waterfalls to, ah- 'suck up the carp in the pool at the base of the waterfall and launch them, at speed, up and over the waterfall'." Sasakibe read off and looked up to see Furuoki staring into the distance, eyes watering.

"They wanted to get to the lake at the top so badly they were swimming up the waterfall, but they kept falling down and getting hurt!" he sobbed, overcome with emotion. "I just made a chute to safely carry them to the top and gently toss them in the lake! how is that a crime?"

"-because when a carp makes it to the top of Tenjo no Ganbo falls, IT TURNS INTO A DRAGON! YOU MADE HUNDREDS OF DRAGONS SUDDENLY APPEAR! THOUSANDS BEFORE THEY COULD DISMANTLE THE DAMN THING!!" Sasakibe shouted.

"Ohhh." Furuoki said, nodding. "-I'd wondered where all the dragons had come from. I still don't see why that's a crime though?"

"Gods help us." Groaned Yamamoto.

"Dragons tend to be. Kinda destructive." Yachiru spoke slowly, her voice still rough and hollow-sounding. " 'specially to little villages."

"Oh." Furuoki said quietly, horrified.

"Don't worry, I'll deal with them once I get my lung back and bust outta this joint." Yachiru reassured him as Sasakibe handed Furuoki his contract.

"You wont be 'busting out' of anywhere, miss-" Sasakibe suffled the papers to open her file. "-Yachiru Unohana! You're obligated to serve General Yamamoto in exchange for your freedom, seeing as you're imprisoned for- for-"

Sasakibe froze, staring at the file. "-That has to be a Mistake."

"What?" Grunted Yamamoto, sizing the woman up. According to the group, if Furuoki who could rip this heavily fortified prison open like an ant's nest was their weakest fighter, this sickly-looking woman was their strongest.

"The file says she's imprisoned for killing ten thousand people!" babbled Sasakibe.

"Oh, no, that isn't right." grunted Yachiru, and Sasakibe sighed with relief.

"-Should be closer to twelve or fifteen thousand." She clarified, and Sasakibe went white.

"Read, sign, mark with your blood at the bottom." Yamamoto sighed, thrusting the contract at her.

"Uhhh... can't." She said, staring blankly at the contract, then slowly looking up at Yamamoto.

"What do you mean 'can't'?"  he growled.

"I can't read." she said.

Sasakibe hid his face in his hands, groaning with pain, while Yamamoto turned on his heel and threw his hands in the air, silently beseeching any available Gods for help.

"You get what you pay for, General." Called Chika, having changed back into the clothes they'd arrived in- garish red-orange and black ninja garb of the Shihon clan- and tying their sword back onto their gaudy belt.

"I am paying all of you a frankly OBSCENE amount of money, I don't think it's unreasonable to expect basic literacy!" Yamamoto snapped.

"It's okay girl, I'll read it to you and then you can have Minazuki back, okay?" Chigiri volunteered, wrapping an arm around her illiterate compatriot and walking her back to some seat-height rocks.

"Let's just get this over with." Yamamoto sighed, glaring at Tsubaki, who only smiled serenely back at him. "Uhin Zenjoji?"

"Present, sir." Beamed the enormous man who looked like a professional Sumo wrestler- there was fat, lots of it, but underneath, an unsettlingly steady grace and power to his movements.

"Your file says you're imprisoned for Smuggling, Murder, Bootlegging, Murder, Trafficking, Murder, More murder and... one hundred seventy two violations of The Migratory Bird Act?"

"The only two I will dispute are the trafficking and migratory bird charges-" he said, delicately holding up two fingers. "-firstly, it's not trafficking to move refugees from the clan wars out of danger without giving the aforementioned clans a cut. I'm no pimp."

"And the birds?" Yamamoto glared, intrigued more than anything.

"A man may have his hobbies and his charitable works!" Uhin said, touching his hand to his chest in faux-impassioned speech. "I collect and breed rare and endangered birds- the world would a sadder place without their songs. So I have- well, had- an aviary up in the mountains where they could be propagated in peace." Uhin sighed.

"Huh. Something nearly bordering on sanity." said Sasakibe said, offering Uhin his contract.

"Got any of them- whatsit- the big kicky bitches?" Danjiro asked.

"Cassowaries?" Uhin asked. "But of course! Delightful little creatures."

Yamamoto decided he didn't hear that, actually, and turned his attention to the final member of the dirty dozen.

"Hello young man!" the decrepit old man creaked cheerfully. "I am Saizo Sakahone." he was bald, liver-spotted, missing teeth and had a spine that bowed like a fishing rod with something much too large for the boat on the end of the line.

"Sakahone like the province?" asked Yamamoto, remembering the western area he'd traveled through recently.

"...In a manner of speaking, I suppose?" Saizo grinned. "Though it's rather the other way around- my lovely wife, may she rest in peace, managed to bear me no less than sixteen beautiful daughters, and they bore at least a dozen granddaughters and so on- Why, by my one thousand one hundred and eleventy-eth birthday, I had somewhere over fifty thousand descendants! So I am not so much named after the province, as the province is named after me!" he chucked.

"...by the Gods." marveled Sasakibe.

"Look, I love my sword too but at least I take it out of the scabbard sometimes." sighed Yamamoto. "What're you in for, family man?"

"O-ho! Now that was quite rash of me, I'm afraid. Yes-" Saizo nodded, rubbing his gnarled-oak hands. "-but as you say, I am a family man and there is nothing I despise so much as someone who does violence to children. No, no, nothing more vile in the world than that..."

Yamamoto felt Sasakibe go stiff beside him, and glanced over. Sasakibe tipped the file closer for his friend to read.

"-The total annihilation of the Uchimaki clan?" Yamamoto asked.

"I was born a shepherd, my boy. My people have been herding cattle over the hills of my province since there were cattle and hills to herd them over. When rot and madness like that turns up in a line- you need to cull backwards at least three generations or it'll set root and spread through your whole herd." he sighed. "What a shame, what a shame, but it had to be done, or they would have learned to turn a profit, treating children like that, and then we'd never be rid of it."

"I saw the crater. Half a mile deep and three times as wide." Said Yamamoto, mustache trembling. "I thought the wrath of the Gods themselves had descended upon them."

"Hm." Saizo nodded, jaw trembling a bit with palsy. "Hm, yes. That's what it felt like."

"Would you like to feel it again?" Yamamoto asked.

"No." Saizo shook his head, but slowly straightened up as much as he could- he must have been close to seven feet tall before the scoliosis set in- flexing his hands and rolling his neck, the power held withing that body starting to come off him in shimmering golden steam. "-but if that's what it takes for me to go home again, then I will be the tool of the Gods once more."

Yamamoto offered him the contract, and did not need to give him instructions.

Behind them, there was a quiet but extremely invasive wet noise and Yamamoto turned to see Unohana unsheath her... well, it lived in a scabbard but it was a muddy green and unusually gooey for a sword. Minazuki bubbled forth from her scabbard, trilling faintly as she solidified and formed into a mottled green cyclopean stingray, large enough to swallow a man, nuzzling at her human affectionately.

"Huh. She does seem to have an exceptionally intimate bond with her Zanpaktou..." Sasakibe noted, then flinched as Minazuki's mouth opened to reveal a fleshy interior of writhing tentacles and strange glands. Without hesitation, Unohana shed her prisoner's robe, which was apparently the and stepped inside to be swallowed with a sigh of relief.

"Very intimate!" grinned Chigiri at Sasakibe's shoulder. "My offer to stitch you up is still on the table, unless you want to develop a similarly intimate relationship with a fish."

"Never did care for seafood..." Sasakibe muttered.

"What about Tsubaki-san?" Furofushi frowned. "Where's her contract?"

"I came here for fighters." Yamamoto shook his head, turning to Tsubaki. "But you are right that The Maggot's Nest is a secure fortress in it's own right. The war is no place for a pri-"

He stopped, staring. Tsubaki had sat down and was rubbing her feet, fingers laced between her toes. She glanced up at him, then down at her feet, smirked, and sat back, wiggling her toes. "No, I agree, the front is no place for a Princess, but it is very much a place for a Diplomat, isn't it?" she asked.

Yamamoto blinked. "I have been thoroughly disinherited from any political position I may have inherited, so I am no princess." She explained, rolling her ankle with a smirk. "-and you are, if I may make an estimation based on my training as a Lady Of Society and now that all of our contracts are signed and bonded, terrible at negotiations."

Yamamoto shook himself, trying to pretend he hadn't been staring at her arches. "...I thought it went fine? Nobody lost a hand."

She smiled, and walked up beside him, lacing her arm with his and gently patting his hand. "My dear. If bookies had been allowed to lay bets on this encounter, the odds of me losing my head would have been considered a sure thing, and the odds on my being able to convince you to properly hire us and pay us, I agree, an 'obscene' amount of money so slim that anyone who took my side would now be a very rich idiot."

Yamamoto squinted at her, trying to translate that in his head.

"...You've conned me." He glared.

"Quite badly, I'm afraid." She smiled.

"You've conned me, but you can con say, that idiot that runs the Omeda clan or the obnoxious boy with the cock's comb that follows Yhwach around even worse." He tried.

Miss Tsubaki smiled, and laced her fingers with his.

"I'm going to have someone much smarter than me write up your contract." he nodded. "Sasakibe? Can you get us home in a-"

Yamamoto turned to see his friend, standing with his robe open while Chigiri knelt before him. Yamamoto blinked in bewilderment, and then realized the woman was stitching his wounds up at speed, her face close to his navel to focus on her work.

"...Hurry?" Yamamoto asked.

"Boss if I go any faster I'm gonna sew his bellybutton shut." Chirigi replied, not looking up.

"She is almost done, sir." Sasakibe winced. "Please don't interrupt her work?"

--- It took a good half hour to get everyone together to leave- clothes changed, signed out of the Maggot's nest and their custody turned over to Yamamoto, Nobotsuna trying to smuggle his "pet" Salamander out, several other prisoners saying tearful goodbyes to Tsubaki and her taking their information down 'for later', Minazuki trying to eat the salamander, and further mayhem while Sasakibe finished drawing the teleportation circle but soon they were lined up, and as the spell activated, Tsubaki gripped Yamamoto's arm rather firmly.

But in a flash, they were returned to Headquarters, Tsubaki blinking from the bright sun.

"General!" the soldier saluted. "Good to see you again! No news from the front, but we have received word the Shihon clan has made an alliance with the Fon clan as the advance approaches their homeland."

"HAH!" Shouted Chika. "Either cousin Genki pulled his head out of his ass or whatever cousin they're on now has good taste! Mingyan is a BABE and a half."

"Nice digs, very nice." Nodded Danjiro, looking around the courtyard. "...Looks really familiar for some reason. Never been to Seireitei, but I swear I've been in a building just like this?"

The other criminals looked around the courtyard, frowning and muttering about how it DID look familiar, and not at all like barracks.

There was a distressing hurgling sort of noise behind them and Minazuki spat out Yachiru Unohana, who tumbled out, nude and covered in slime. She rolled to the foot of the shrine, and sat up, blinking at the statue inside.

"Hey-" She called, voice still low and a rough but the hollow wetness had gone. "-Why's the military got a shrine to Yatagarasu?"

The others looked at the shrine and then around the building again. The orderly layout, the way the men were fit and professional but not precisely military, the extensive filing and sorting system visible through the open doors, Yamamoto's confession to Mail-tampering, the shrine to the Messenger of the Gods...

"You know, I did think it was rather strange that you were able to rally a small but apparently quite fast and very loyal army without the aid of any major clans." Tsubaki sighed. "How very industrious of you, Postmaster-General Yamamoto!"

[sunshine-on-my-mind]

Fresh Start

Andy Barber x Plus Size!single mother reader

warning: Fluff, mentions of divorce, mention of accident (DJ spoilers), Age gap, single mom reader, love for chocolate milk.

words: 1,066

a/n: this idea just popped into my mind and i just love meet cutes!! so here it goes. hope y’all like it. Andy is so cute omg.

DO NOT REPOST OR STEAL MY WORK

reblogs and comments are appreciated <3

PART 2 here

(made the moodboard)

next part

Andy Barber was no longer the same man after everything that happened, neither did he have the same life. After the accident, it took quite some time for Jacob to recover and till that time he was there with him and Laurie like a pillar. When he recovered, all of them decided that it’s better to take a fresh start but Andy had realised he could no longer stay in Newton, he couldn’t stay with Laurie and pretend everything is fine. It’s true he loved Jacob more than everything and it will hurt him to stay away from him but it’s probably better that way. Jacob understood that, in fact he too thinks it’s better if his parents separated, it will be less toxic. Laurie understood her mistake and apologised a lot and she too agrees with them. They separated their ways, got divorced.

Andy moved to a different town but he will always stay very much in contact with Jacob. His son will visit him at least once a month. He is in talking terms with Laurie, they both want Jacob’s well being. This town is Andy’s fresh start. He is trying to build his career again. But to be honest he isn’t sure what he is looking for. Neither in life nor in the supermarket he is at the moment.

Maybe some juice? he ponders the question he asked himself when he hears his name from an unknown voice. “Andy!! Andy wait.” he turns to see a woman, probably in her mid twenties, calling his name. what he notices later, is a little girl running towards him looking for something, and almost bumps into him. The woman reach them soon and stops beside the girl. “how many times have i told you to wait for me and not run in the store?” the girl has her attention somewhere else, her eyes at the chocolate milk displayed in the freezer. Andy looks at them. The woman now meets his gaze. “Sorry, my daughter started rushing here as soon as we entered the store. I’m sorry she almost bumped into you.” Andy chuckles, “it’s no problem”.

Before she could say anything her 4 year old daughter speaks “Ma, ma i want chocolate milk i want chocolate milk please. please.” She gives the little girl a look. “please ma.” she pouts. “hey no pouting missy, fine you can get chocolate milk, on one condition.” the girl looks with hopeful eyes. “If you promise to share it with me.” (y/n) winks. the little girl giggles and tries to reach for the milk when Andy, who was admiring their interaction with a smile on his face, reaches for the chocolate milk on the top shelf to give it to her. “Here you go, Andi i presume?” she takes it from his hand and nods with a smile. “you know my name?” she asks, he bends down a little to reduce the height difference. “yes, i do miss.” Andi looks amused. “and can i tell you a secret? it’s my name too” little Andi gasps and puts her little hands on her mouth. “wow” she says.

(y/n) chuckles and looks at Andy. “Oh my god, sorry it must have been weird to see a random woman calling out your name like that. “ Andy looks at her, really looks at her, she is beautiful, radiant, gorgeous.“well it was kinda surprising at first but now it seems like a pleasant surprise.” he says with a charming smile. (y/n) smiles back. “I am (y/n) and this is Andrea, well Andi” she introduces themselves. Andy moves his big hand in front of little Andi for her to shake it. she shakes it with her little hand. “I am Andy, Andrew Barber, nice to meet you both.”

“Are you new here?” (y/n) asks while they move towards the billing counter. “Yes, just shifted two weeks ago, you stay nearby?” Andy kicks himself mentally for sounding eager “sorry, didn’t mean to pry.” (y/n) informs it’s not a problem and that they lived nearby. They make small talk, (Y/n) shares little stories about how life is in their town. the town is pleasant and beautiful, has many children’s parks which her daughter loves. Overall this place has been kind to Andi and her. The school is nice too. Andy listens to her with a constant smile on his face. Andi too listens, holding her mother’s hand and swinging it gently, happy she got her chocolate milk.

But Andy wants to talk more, to know her. wait is she married? with someone? he can’t assume anything just because she hasn’t mentioned anything about a significant other. Maybe it’s too soon to say anything but Andy has a feeling that these two can a part of his fresh start, he is not in a rush though, which is a good thing. Little Andi is a charming kid and Andy wants to know her more too.

“Listen i am new here so, if not a problem, would you and Andi maybe show me around a little?” he says, trying to hide the nervousness. “Sure, we stay a little busy during the week though, maybe on Saturday, if you are free?” Andy nods. “Done.” They exchange numbers. Andi pulls her mother’s hand to say something. (y/n) bends down and Andi whispers in her ear, loud enough for Andy to hear, “I like him Ma, he is nice” Andy smiles and so does (y/n).

Andy offers to drop them home in his car, but (y/n) informs it’s really close so they usually just walk home. “Are you sure? it’s won’t be a problem.” she smiles, “yeah Andy, we can walk, thanks for the offer.” Andi looks a little upset at that, as if she wanted to go together with Andy. “Alright miss Andi, i’ll see you on Saturday then.” she smiles but motions him to bend down. he does and she whispers, again a little loudly, “ma is single.” Andy can’t help the chuckle that leaves his mouth. He didn’t expect to feel relieved with the new information but he does.

“Andi come on sweetheart we gotta go now.” she quickly holds her mother’s hand again and waves “Bye Andy!” he wishes back the same. Andy and (y/n) share another look as they smile before going their ways.

Andy seems hopeful about the future. This will be his fresh start.

[whiteqnn]

Pairing: Corpse Husband x Fem! Reader

Summary: Sean invites one of his good friends - Y/N - to play with him and the group. She has a lot of fun with them, but at the same time is too oblivious, too nice, and too pure to notice that one particular Among Us player has taken a liking to her the moment he heard her voice...

Notes: Hello everyone! This is the very first time I’m publishing something bigger in here, I’m honestly still figuring out how Tumblr works, even though I’ve had this account for quite some time now 😅. That being said, please don’t expect anything super impressive. I tried my best though just so you know. 🥺

A/N- It didn’t turn out as I expected, but I really hope at least some of you find it enjoyable :(

Y/C/N - your channel name

part 2

part 3 

part 4 

part 5 

PURE [1]

“Did you guys find anybody?” Felix asked, as the number of players still showed just 7 of them. They could just start now, but the game would be way more fun with a full lobby. 

“Yeah, Lily’s joining. I just texted her the code, so she should be here at any moment.” Sykkuno replied after receiving a text message from the said girl. “Oh, and Corpse also said he’d be joining soon.” 

“Great. Anyone else?”

 “I think Jack was also bringing someone, right?” Dave asked.

“Huh? Oh yeah, I have one coming, she’ll join us in a few” the asked man replied at the same moment Lily’s character appeared in the lobby. 

“Who you’re bringing Jack?” 

“Y/N” he said, causing Felix to gasp in shock and yell into his mic:

“How the fuck did you manage to convince her? I’ve been bugging her about this game for the past week and she always had some excuse!” 

“What can I say, my charm is irresistible” Jack replied nonchalantly, causing everyone in the lobby to laugh at his fake deep voice.

The number of participants changed to 9, as a little black astronaut with horns on his helmet appeared in the lobby. 

“Corpse, you’re here!” Rae’s character ran up to the man, circling him excitedly. 

“Hey man!”

“What’s up, Corpse?”

“Hello everyone” his deep voice sounded out “Sorry to keep you waiting.”

“All good man, we’re still waiting for one person.” Felix reassured him “Sean, why is she not here yet? Are you sure you’ve sent her the right code?”

“Of course I am!” he all but shouted at Felix “And about that, she just texted me to give her a few more minutes and that we should start without her.”

“We can just wait, right?” Lily offered, earning a few hums of approval from the others.

“I think it might take a little longer than a few minutes, she has some problems with her microphone.”

“Who are you guys talking about?” Corpse asked, completely unaware of who Jack was referring to.

“Wait, Jack, you mean Y/N from Y/C/N?” Sykkuno asked suddenly, only then realizing why this name sounded familiar

“Yeah, the one and only” Jack replied, a smile evident in his voice.

“Oh my god, I love her videos!” Rae exclaimed at that “She’s so funny and sweet!”

“Yeah! Her new video is so freaking cute, I wish she’d upload more often.” Poki agreed. 

“Right?” Jack said, clearly very proud of his friend. “But don’t let that sweet demeanor fool you guys cause she’s one of the best players I’ve encountered in this game.”

“That’s true, she’s a secret big brain genius” Toast confirmed, making Pewdiepie gasp once again. 

“wHAT??YOU TWO PLAYED WITH HER?!” Felix’s offended voice boomed through everyone’s headphones “HOW DARE YOU. HOW COULD YOU NOT INVITE ME?!” 

“That’s for not inviting me to your latest Cringe episode!” Jack was quick to respond, making others in the lobby laugh at their mini fight. 

“Oh, so that’s where I recognized her from!” Sykkuno nearly shouted when he finally put two and two together. “I can’t wait to meet her, she seems like a really nice person.”

“She is! When she got impostor for the first time she refused to kill me” Toast explained, earning himself a couple of Aww’s from his friends. “So we just ran around the emergency button until I called the meeting and voted her off.”

“Yeah, only to be her first victim in the next game.” Jack all but giggled, clearly very amused at the memory of Y/N going into a full berserk mode. No one except for him and Toast knew how good she really was at this game... 

“She’s basically the wolf in sheep’s skin” Felix concluded with a chuckle “Very soft wolf, however.”

“She’s like the complete opposite of Corpse, both in voice and personality” Jack suddenly said, making Felix laugh wholeheartedly at something only two of them understood at the moment. 

“I don’t know how should I take that” Corpse admitted with a chuckle. He remained silent for most of the conversation since he didn’t really know who the guys were talking about. But he would lie if he said he wasn’t intrigued by this girl at least in the slightest. Although he heard about her channel, he hasn’t seen any of her videos, so he didn’t really know what to expect. But hearing what gamers like Sean and Felix said about her, he knew he’s not gonna be disappointed once the girl joins them in the game. 

“Imagine Corpse and Y/N talking.” Felix said suddenly with a seemingly very amused voice.

“Imagine Corpse and Y/N both being Impostors” Toast said, which resulted in many of them shouting over each other at how crazy that would be. 

“Alright, now that you mention this I start fearing the moment two of them meet” Jack confessed with loud laughter following the sentence. Corpse chuckled deeply under his breath, at the same time glancing at the questions his audience was asking him in his stream. He could hardly read any, as there were quite a lot of people asking, so all he saw was just a bunch of comments moving at the speed of light in his chat. He wouldn't say it out loud, but he was slightly nervous, seeing the growing number of people watching his stream. It was still a rather new thing to him, and he feared he'd say something inappropriate, or just make a complete idiot out of himself. 

"At least no one can see me..." he mumbled under his breath after muting his microphone. 

"Oh! Y/N just texted me! She's joining the call right now!" 

"Fuck yeah!" Felix shouted excitedly "Just so you know Jack, I won't forget that you two played without me."

"Uh-oh. Is that a threat? Are you threatening me now?" 

"It's a warning" Felix replied, receiving a series of gasps from other players. "If I get impostor, you're the first one on my list."

"Okay, everyone heard that! You know who to vote off when I'm dead!" 

"It's so cool to play with someone new, I wonder if she's as good as you guys depict her" Sykkuno spoke up, but before anyone could answer his question, a new character popped up in the lobby.

*** 

"Hi everyone! I’m sorry I left you just like that, but this stream would be completely useless without me being able to answer your questions. Fortunately it wasn’t anything serious, I just had to readjust my mic and go through the settings to find what was wrong. Took some time, but here I am now!” Y/N chirped into her microphone, smiling apologetically at her webcam. At the moments like this, she really appreciated how supportive her audience was. No one was hating on her when she had to get off the stream for a couple of minutes, and everyone was just so understanding that it made her heart melt. Perhaps her audience wasn’t very big, but it felt almost like a second family to her. 

“Anyway, as you already know from my twitter, today I’ll be playing Among Us with my friends and their friends! I can’t wait if I’m being honest, last time I played this game was so much fun, and there was only a few of us.” she admitted with a genuine smile on her face. “Let’s just text Sean now so we can get into the lobby...”

Y/N: Ready to play with you guys ^^

Jackaboy: Great! You got that mic fixed already? 

Y/N: Yes, everything is fine. I’m sorry you had to wait so long.

Jackaboy: It’s all good kiddo, no worries. I’ll call you and send you the code in a sec. 

Y/N: Perfect, thank you Sean :)

Jackaboy: Btw, everyone can’t wait to meet you ;-)Y/N stared at the screen for a moment, only now, seconds before joining the group, realizing how nervous she felt. From Sean’s tweets she saw earlier, she figured that the lobby was right now full of many famous streamers, those she wouldn’t even compare herself to. It’s not that she thought of herself very low, but... being among such youtube celebrities like them made her panic a little bit. She didn’t want to look like a complete fool amongst them. 

Playing or recording with Sean and Felix was something else because she knew those guys for years (and yet still sometimes found herself thinking how lucky she got to be able to call them her friends). She felt good in their company, not worrying about choosing the right words. But amongst the rest of the players, she knew only Toast and talked with Rae maybe once in her life... 

What if the rest won’t like her? 

Y/N cleared her throat, realizing that she was still staring at her phone like hypnotized and her audience was already asking her what’s going on. She quickly typed in the code Sean had texted her and readjusted her headphones, before joining the discord chat.

“THERE SHE IS” screamed Sean, making her grin from ear to ear, hearing how excited he was “Little wonderchild!”

“I think you meant little TRAITOR” Felix corrected him with a scoff. A silence settled in the lobby as everyone was waiting for Y/N to speak up.

“Um... hello everyone..” she said softly, almost inaudibly, a sudden wave of shyness taking over her. “I’m Y/N” 

“Oh, you were right about that Corpse thing!” replied another, also very soft and very sweet voice, and Y/N saw the image of someone named Lily pop up. “It’s like the exact opposite!” 

“See? Told ya. Everyone, meet Y/N/N, the little angel from Y/C/N.” 

“Hey Y/N!”

“Hi there!”

“Hey, what’s up?”

“H-Hi, so great to meet you, Y/N!” a very friendly sounding voice said, and a little lime astronaut with the name Sykkuno above it started running around her. “Can’t wait to play with you!”

“That’s so nice, thank you” she replied with a wide smile on her face, moving around his character as well. “I can’t wait to play with you too, actually with all you guys. It’s so great to be here with you.”

“Jack I swear she’s the cutest little thing I’ve ever heard. Where the hell did you find her?!” Poki all but yelled at the man, making Y/N giggle to herself and in-process loosen up a little bit. They all seemed like someone she’d happily be friends with. 

“Or rather, where do you get one?” someone else commented, making them all burst into laughter, Y/N included. 

“Guys, what did I say about that sweet demeanor...” Jack said after calming down from his fit “Don’t put your guard down just because she sounds like that!”

“Wait- what did you tell them about me?” Y/N asked confused, the tone of her voice making him laugh even more “Jack!”

“Don’t worry, only the good stuff” a very deep, low voice spoke up, leaving her taken aback for a moment. Her eyes widened slightly and she glanced at the name of that person, reading out CORPSE. Now that’s something she didn’t expect... 

“Corpse, mind your manners! You didn’t even introduce yourself!” 

“Oh, shit- yeah, sorry. Um, I’m Corpse, it’s very nice to meet you Y/N” he replied right after, making her lip corners curl up into a smile. 

“Nice to meet you too Corpse, you have a really pleasant voice.” she spoke sweetly, completely unaware of the chaos that was taking place in her stream chat. She didn’t even think of it the way her audience did, she just simply spoke up her mind, and being an incredibly nice person - turned it into a compliment.

“Oh- wow. I mean, thank you so much. I love your voice too, it’s really sweet” he replied, nervously chuckling at the end, before muting his mic. It was, however, enough for Felix and Sean to start teasing him, as the two immediately screamed:

“SIIIMP!!!”

“It’s the voice Felix, I told you he’d fall into her trap!” 

“Wait- he was just being nice, guys! Stop making fun of him” Y/N immediately defended the man, trying to speak up over the hysterical laughter of the other players. 

“Oh my god, but what if they both get impostors and they both pull the voice cards on us?!” Rae managed to yell through all the noise, making Y/N even more confused.

“Wait, what? What do you mean? I don’t understand.” 

“Don’t worry Y/N, that’s how I feel all the time around them.” Sykkuno seemed to be the only one who heard her question, as the rest continued their gabbing without giving her as much as a glance. 

“Alright, let’s start the game maybe. I might have a few old scores to settle” Toast cleared his throat theatrically, his astronaut coming face to face with Y/N’s. 

“Oh, you mean me? I thought I already apologized!” she replied frantically. “You gave me no choice Toast, I didn’t even want to kill you in the first place...”

“BUT YOU DID. IN THE VERY FIRST ROUND” 

“I’m sorry!” 

“Alright, enough! Toast, just don’t kill her right away, okay? Let her run around the map, fearing for her life for a moment.” Y/N gasped upon hearing Jack’s words, clearly sensing the smirk behind his voice. 

“Wha- Jack?! Since when are you against me?!” 

“Don’t worry Y/N, I won’t let them hurt you. You haven’t played with us yet, I’ll protect you.” 

“Oh, thank you so much Sykkuno! I’ll protect you too!” 

“Great. Another one simping...” was Felix’s last words, before the game began. 

Y/N sighed in relief upon seeing the word crewmate forming on her screen, but at the same time feared Toast’s inevitable revenge. She thought they'd already buried the hatchet, but it seemed that he was desperate to make her pay for the last time they played together. 

“Aw, Sykkuno was serious” she mumbled with a smile, when his lime astronaut started circling her white one, so she would follow him. “Okay, let’s do some tasks.”

They both made their way towards the medbay, Sykkuno patiently waiting nearby as she did the scan, then Y/N waiting for him to do the same. The moment his little character stepped towards her, a meeting was called by none other than Felix.

“What happened?” Rae asked.

“I called the meeting because I’m afraid of Jack” he responded, causing everyone to laugh. “Seriously though! Dude’s been following me around the whole time.”

“I was just making sure nobody kills you.”

“Yeah don’t go all Sykkuno on me!” Felix screamed, making the call erupt into even more laughter. 

“Alright, are we skipping?” 

“Yeah.”

“Guys, my life is in danger!” Felix wouldn’t give up. “Come on, show some support! Y/N? You played with him, you know his techniques!” 

“Sorry Felix” Y/N giggled, clicking the skip button. 

When the next round began, Sykkuno was quick to join Y/N on her way towards admin, where they both found Poki doing the upload. They did the card swipe and left her there, when the lights suddenly went off.

“Uh-oh. Let’s head the opposite direction, Sykkuno” the girl murmured, dancing around his character and heading towards Comms instead of going to Electrical. It was the easiest way to die, after all. 

Once they entered the room and waited for someone to fix the lights, Y/N could see another figure appear in the same location. She couldn’t recognize whose character it was, but upon seeing the horns on the helmet she smiled to herself.

“Hey there, Corpse” she said, walking up to the black astronaut, who was standing still in the same place as if he was just watching her and Sykkuno run around Comms instead of doing their tasks. 

They stood like that for a couple of seconds until Corpse turned around and ran away, and that’s when the first body was reported. 

“Oh no, Jack!” 

“Poor guy. He’s gonna haunt us now.”

“Where’s the body?” 

“Navigation” replied Rae, who was the one to find Sean’s green astronauts’ body “Didn’t see anyone around, but I’m pretty sure someone just vented right in front of my eyes...”

“Any suspicions?” Toast asked.

“Um, not really sure, it was the exact same moment the lights went off. I was doing tasks with Jack and then he just died. I only saw the vent close, nothing or no one else.”

“Okay, where are you guys right now?” 

“I’m in admin with Dave, we only passed Poki when we got there.” Lily’s voice sounded out, quickly being joined by Poki’s explanation.

“Yeah, I was finishing the upload when you guys came in, Y/N and Sykkuno saw it”

“Did you see her?” Toast asked, addressing his question towards the white and lime astronauts. 

“Yes, we were doing the card swipe before going to Comms. Corpse joined us for a moment and then left.”

“Yeah, I was on my way to fix the lights when I stumbled upon them in Comms, the body was reported the exact moment I left.”

“Can someone confirm this? I mean, did someone see you besides the two of them?” Toast continued his questioning. 

“I think I only saw Felix in Medbay.”

“Hmm, so no one really knows where you were this whole time. You could easily lure Jack into Navigation and kill him there. Is that what you did, Corpse?”

“Woah, that’s some serious accusation” Corpse replied in his usual, low and calm voice. “Where were you Toast? You seem the only one who still doesn’t have an alibi”

“Neither does Felix.” Y/N spoke innocently, and the mentioned man quickly started his explanation.

“Okay, I was with Jack at the beginning but he clearly can’t confirm this since someone snapped his fucking neck. We’ve split up in O2 after doing our tasks and then he must’ve gone with Rae. I just wandered around the map, escaping from the death.”

“Hmm, so not only were you one of the last people to see him alive, but you also admit to not doing your tasks” Y/N said, trying her best to keep her voice steady and stop herself from laughing. She was sure Sykkuno was doing the same thing, they both refused to do any tasks after the lights went off, after all.

“Yeah, but does that already makes me an Imposter? I’m just scared for my life, that’s all.”

“Y/N has some good logic, but I’m not really sure it’s Pewds. I mean, I saw him in Medbay and he really seemed to be just jogging around.” Corpse said, his voice almost immediately doing its magic, as people more or less willingly agreed to skip this round as well. 

“I think it’s Felix. I mean, I haven’t played with him yet, but I have this feeling that he’s just acting.” Y/N said to her chat after muting herself. She went towards Weapons to do another task, seeing Sykkuno’s little character follow her once again, but the doors were suddenly locked and his lime astronaut remained in Cafeteria. “Oh no, Sykkuno” she sighed with a pout on her face, deciding against waiting for him and risking getting her neck snapped. She finished her task in Weapons and moved towards another location, when suddenly Corpse appeared in front of her, coming right out of nowhere. 

“Oh- Corpse, you scared me to death” Y/N breathed a laugh, watching as his character stood still for a couple of seconds, before circling around her white astronaut. Y/N nodded her head with a smile, even though he couldn’t see her, and followed him in Shields, where they found Poki’s dead body. 

“The body is in Shields” Y/N replied right after reporting the body, only to gasp in shock when she realized more than one person was killed. Red crosses decorated not only Poki’s name but were also visible next to Dave and Lily. 

“What the hell?!” Felix all but yelled into his mic, obviously shocked just like everyone else who was still alive. 

“Now that’s... a lot of bodies” Sykkuno mumbled under his breath. 

“Alright, who’s in Shields? Y/N, you said you found the body there, which one?”

“Poki’s, Corpse was there with me” her reply was followed by his short and low hum. 

“Sykkuno, where are you? I didn’t see you anywhere since the last round.” Felix asked, clearly accusing the lime astronaut of being a murderer. 

“I was... doing the wires in electrical, Toast was there for a moment as well.”

“Yeah but I was only searching for the body, so I saw you maybe for a second” Toast replied, building even more suspicions around Sykkuno.

“But- guys, you know I wouldn’t kill two people in one round, let alone four of them.”

“No one says you did that, I only mentioned that you were nowhere to be seen. You could’ve been sabotaging the map for the other Impostor” Felix said nonchalantly.

“Guys, I-”

“It’s him! It must be him!” Rae shouted through her mic. 

“Sykkuno is 100% innocent, I can vouch for him” Y/N’s voice sounded out in everyone’s headphones “We were together since the start of the game and he didn’t kill me, even though he had quite a number of chances to do so.”

“Weren’t you with Corpse this time?” Felix asked suspiciously.

“I was! But at the beginning, I was with Sykkuno, until someone locked him in Cafeteria. That’s when we split up.”

“And you haven’t seen him ever since?”

“Well, no, but-”

“Then I can assure you it was only a matter of time before he’d stab you in the back” Toast concluded, making Sykkuno gasp in confusion.

“Wha- No, I would never do that! Y/N is our guest, I was just making sure she was okay!”

“Sykkuno, simping won’t save your life right now” 

“Wha- I- Guys!” he tried to stutter out some logical explanation “Y/N, don’t believe them!”

“I don’t, I know you’re innocent! C’mon guys, he wouldn’t do it!” 

“Yeah yeah, let’s kick him out. Corpse, who are you voting?” Toast asked, and Y/N could see the I voted sign next to his character. 

“I kinda feel like Felix tries to shift the blame onto Sykkuno. He didn’t even tell his location, and was already throwing accusations on someone else.” Corpse replied after a moment, making the smile widen on Y/N’s face. Someone was finally on her side! 

“That’s because he can’t even explain himself!” Felix exclaimed, voting as well. 

“Besides, I’m pretty sure if it wasn’t for whoever locked that door, Y/N would be dead as well!” 

“No, I told you I-!”

“Guys, we have ten seconds to vote. Rae?” 

“I think it’s him as well. He was acting suspiciously since we started this round. I vote Sykkuno”

“But..!” 

“No, Sykkuno...” Y/N whispered with a pout on her lips, when she saw the number of people who voted for her lime friend. 

Sykkuno was ejected. 

“Alright, I’m pretty sure it’s Felix. I saw Rae multiple times and she didn’t kill me, Toast also doesn’t act very Impostor like, but maybe that’s just one of his strategies... Corpse is with me again, I don’t think that’s him, I mean, he followed me around last round, but still didn’t do anything, and even vouched for me and Sykkuno when we were both clearly chilling in comms. It can’t be him... right?” 

 Dead body reported.

 “I just saw Corpse kill Toast, then vent!” Rae’s voice blared through Y/N’s headphones, as she looked in shock at the red cross next to Toast’s name. If not him, then..?

“What?” the accused man asked calmly “That’s a self-report, she’s trying to frame me. You guys can’t possibly believe her.”

“I believe her. I saw you enter the Electrical with Toast, then he’s suddenly dead” Felix said. 

“That’s because she vented in there and killed him.”

“No! I swear, Y/N/N you have to believe me!” she directed her words towards the girl who remained silent during their discussion, processing her accusations over and over in her head. “I was fixing the wires, Toast was doing another task, and then boom! I see Corpse snapping his neck!”

“How could you see that if the lights were off?” Y/N suddenly asked, making Rae cut her own sentence off “No one went to fix them, they were off the entire round.”

Silence. 

“It’s Rae, it must be her” Corpse couldn’t help but laugh wholeheartedly at how small was the mistake which completely blew Rae’s cover. “We’re voting Rae, right Y/N?”

“No! Guys, I mean, let me explain, I-!”

Rae was ejected. 

“Now that was something I didn’t expect. I would’ve never thought it was her, I even suspected that Sykkuno might really have been the other Impostor, but now... It’s just me, Corpse, and Felix. I’m clear, clearly, so it must be one of them. And since Corpse protected me for the past few rounds, there’s no other option than...”

Her eyes suddenly widened when the realization hit her, and she quickly turned around to speed towards the emergency button. Fortunately, no one was around to stop her from calling the meeting.

“Felix.” Y/N started, trying to contain her excitement and sound seriously “Where were you when Sean was killed?”

Neither Corpse of Felix said a word, as it was probably the last question they expected her to ask. Felix cleared his throat, however, and finally replied:

“Y/N, that was literally the beginning of a game. How am I supposed to remember what I did then?”

“Well” she said nonchalantly “I, for example, clearly remember the things you said even when we were in the lobby.”

“What are you implying?” 

“Wasn’t it you, who told everyone that Sean was your number one if you get Impostor?” she asked with a wicked smile on her face. Felix was dumbfounded, he obviously didn’t expect her to pull that card on him, hell, he didn’t even know how she knew about it since she wasn’t even in the call at the time. 

“FELIX” Corpse suddenly broke the silence, simultaneously breaking the said man from his train of thoughts. 

“Okay, first of all- YOU WEREN’T EVEN IN THE CALL WHEN I SAID THAT” he yelled through his mic, making both Y/N and Corpse laugh, as it only confirmed their suspicions. 

“See? You only proved my point.” 

“Oh, fuck’s sake- I was just joking okay?!” he tried to defend himself, but hearing how he couldn’t even contain his own laughter anymore, it was clear he already accepted the defeat. “It wasn’t serious, god damn it!” 

“You know what to do, Y/N” Corpse’s voice asked through her headphones, and surely, she knew exactly what to do.

“C’mon Y/N, that’s not fair! At least let me explain myself!” 

“Bye Felix” she said in an overly dramatic tone before Corpse voted as well. 

Soon enough, the sign VICTORY could be seen on her screen, which made her squeak and joy. This game was really fun, even though she was so scared of being killed first. 

“I knew it! I knew you would figure out it’s him! That son of a bitch who murdered me!” Jack basically yelled out, clearly very happy about the result. 

“Y/N, seriously now, how did you know I’ve said that?” Felix asked without even hiding his surprised tone.

“Let’s just say I might’ve stolen some of your viewers, Felix” she admitted, winking at her webcam, a new wave of comments landing on her chat. “Thanks guys!” 

“Okay, that is rude and not fair!” 

“It helped me win, so I’ve got nothing else to say” Y/N grinned from ear to ear, before muting herself for a moment to finally answer some of the questions from her chat, while the rest took a quick break to eat something or go to the bathroom.

She was halfway through telling the story of how she met Sean when she noticed she got a message from a private discord chat. 

CORPSE: That was really impressive :)

Y/N smiled to herself upon seeing his text and quickly typed out the answer. 

Y/N: Thanks!! I wouldn’t have done that without you though, you stood up for me and Sykkuno and all

Y/N: Also, thanks for protecting me from being murdered ^^

CORPSE: No problem, I knew you were innocent right away. 

CORPSE: Anyway, good game, Sean was right saying that you’re one of the best players

She couldn’t help the blush that arose on her cheeks, it was very sweet of him to say that, even though she didn’t actually do much except for exposing Felix. 

Y/N: I wasn’t an Impostor though, so you didn’t really see much :)

She watched the three dots beside his name, that signaled he was still texting. The chat was completely forgotten, but people seemed to quickly notice that small, shy smile on her lips, and the pink tint decoring her cheeks.

CORPSE: Okay, now I’m intrigued... 

Y/N: Maybe we’ll both be Impostors one day ^^

CORPSE: Can’t wait for that to happen.

Soon enough, they returned to the lobby to begin another game. Y/N glanced at her chat for a second, and the moment she returned her eyes to the game, her jaw basically dropped. 

IMPOSTOR was written in bold letters in the middle of the red screen, right above her name.

Corpse’s little character was standing beside her.