#like it's SO SAD. and to me a big part of his story is accepting who HE is. seeing himself outside of his deal w mizora or what his father
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fallingbyjuleecruise ¡ 8 months ago
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every day i think about the ansur plot in act 3 could've actually had emotional weight if larian studios gave a shit about wyll. damn.
#like the whole gauntlet is about expressing the type of heroism that wyll has striven for his entire life.#the way the quest is so prototypical in it's fairy tale sensibility of the honest and true hero awaking a dragon under the city and -#saving the day and he goes through this whole gauntlet that's a test of how well he ascribes to the ideals of balduran and his father -#and everything he ever clung to to validate himself to himself after being coerced into mizora's deal as a 17 year old kid and then -#he succeeds! he passes the tests! only to find that ansur (literally named answer) is an undead abomination you have to put down#like it's SO SAD. and to me a big part of his story is accepting who HE is. seeing himself outside of his deal w mizora or what his father#wanted him to be and the fact that wyll isn't allowed to have a big emotional reaction to the ansur situation is so annoying#in fact wyll doesn't EVER get to have an emotional reaction to anything bc larian studios doesn't care enough to flesh his story out -#despite giving him one of the most interesting ideas for a character in the game! like act 3 should be WYLL'S act! he's so tied into -#everyone important in that act that it's actually a crime that he's sidelined the most there and he doesn't have enough vocal fans -#that larian studios will ever care enough to patch his story or add anything like they did for karlach or astarion. it's so dumb.#and it sucks that the writers don't recognize wyll's abuse bc his abuser is a hot devil lady. what she does to him is sick. god.#anyway. whatever.#baldur's gate 3#my posts#.txt
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bunnis-monsters ¡ 4 months ago
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Please please please 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
Mermaid reader x merman, reader being courted by the mermannn, like, giving her shells, hunting big fish and like that!!
NSFW
A/N: Decided to post this little snippet tonight… you’re getting more merman stuff tomorrow lol… the mermaid pod one is coming and it’s short, but it’s more of me putting an idea out there to see if anyone wants me to continue than an actual story.
You raised an eyebrow as your newfound friend brought you yet another pretty shell, cooing and nuzzling against your leg.
It was the fourth one that day, and when you didn’t sound as impressed this time, he frowned, tilting his head and resting his chin on your knee.
The small deck by the beach had become your meeting place, where the two of you would hang out, swim together, and share gentle kisses.
You weren’t sure if he understood that kissing like that was for couples, but he obviously enjoyed it. And after you kissed his lips for the first time, he started bringing you gifts, expecting a kiss every time he came.
Before you could apologize for not being grateful for the shell he brought, he brightened up and swam away. You were sad to think you may have scared him away.
For the better part of the summer, he had been your only companion. It would break your heart if he had left for good because of your rude response.
But to your surprise, he returned within 15 minutes, the tail of a large fish in his mouth. He dropped it next to you, laying his head in your lap and purring loudly.
And it dawned on you then as he looked up at you expectantly, pawing at your bathing suit.
He was courting you.
Your face felt hot with both embarrassment and arousal. It wasn’t long before you slipped into the water, letting him tear at the thin fabric keeping your fat pussy away from him.
Every thrust felt like heaven, and he couldn’t stop crying out at the warmth your pussy exuded as it clamped down on his fat, slippery cock.
By the end of the night you were stuffed full of cum and being safely tucked away in a small cave where he’d been storing his kills.
Your love was so happy you’d finally accepted his proposal~
NSFW TAGLIST: @sunset-214 @strawberrypoundtown @avalordream @icommitwarcrimes @bazpire @im-eating-rn @anglingforlevels @kinshenewa @pasteldaze @unforgettablewhvre @yoongiigolden @peachesdabunny @murder-hobo @leiselotte @misswonderfrojustice @dij-ology @i8kaeya @lollboogurl @h3110-dar1in9 @keikokashi @aliceattheart @mssmil3y @spicyspicyliving @namjoons-t1ddies @izarosf1833 @healanette @lem-hhn @spufflepuff @honey-crypt @karljra @zyettemoon1800 @exodiam @vexillum-moeru @imperfectlyperfectprincess1 @buckoothecow @binnieonabike @enchantedsylveon @mysticranger575 @readeryn68 @danielle143 @kittenlover614 @filthybunny420 @annavittoria-mm @makimamybelovedwife @blubearxy @omglovelylaila
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vhaos-chaotic-writing ¡ 2 months ago
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Hello, Can I resquest, Transformers One, Yandere Sentinel Prime with a cybertronian reader conjux HCS
Oooh Sentinel Prime - lowkey, I believed I was gonna hate his guts until my very last breath. But I forgot I like fucked up characters that also have babygirl tratis (I mean - I am obsessed with Starscream, I understimated myself).(〃` 3′〃)
Yandere!Sentinel Prime (TFO) w/ Conjux Cybertronian!Reader (HCs)
WARNING: Yandere behaviour, possessive and obsessive elements, manipulation, psychological and emotional abuse, forced relationship.
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Sentinel Prime is definitely a manipulative, possessive yandere that is not afraid to punish his Conjux with psychological or emotional punishment types.
You were older than both Orion Pax and D-16, a miner too - a hard working one who was always kind and tried to remain positive to everything, even when the guards were kind of jerks and your teammates got hurt while working.
Sentinel met you one day he went down to the mines to just say empty words and promises that fooled enough his blind admirers to keep up working hard. The moment his optics met yours among the other miners... he felt like his spark vibrated.
Uh, how strange - he was sure he was definitely disgusted by any bot, no matter if they were femme, mechs or none, that were a miner.
But here he is, thinking about you and talking Airachnid's audials off about you.
Maybe now he understood what Megatronus said about feeling his spark sing whenever Solus Prime was by his side.
Sentinel Prime started to look after you, visiting you down in the mines and trying to woo you. And while you were quite flattered... something in your spark knew something was wrong. You didn't knew exactly what it was wrong - but everything pointed at Sentinel, one way or another.
You tried to be polite and paint an imaginary limit line between you and the false Prime - but Sentinel knew what you were doing. And he wasn't gonna have it.
"Hehe... oh, sweetspark - it's so funny how you think you can just reject my advances! You should be grateful I have my optics on you, dear! But... Oh, well, I wished we had an organic 'fall-in-love' story to later tell our sparklings! But you left me with no options."
You were... confused. And scared. But before you could even step back, you felt a painful kick in the back of your helm, soon everything going dark.
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When your optics onlined, you were met with a... new faceplate.
"Oh, thanks Primus! My love, are you okay?" The unknown mech asks as he gently craddles your faceplate with his servos.
"Where... where am I? What...?" You start to ask, blinking a few times before tilting your helm, staring with curiosity at the mech. "Who are you?"
The mech seems to smile a little bit more to then change his expression one to sadness. "Oh, my sweetspark - you don't remember me?"
The mech - Sentinel Prime - gently held your servo as both of you walked among the big, luxurious hallways of his home, explaining to you how you both were soon to be Conjuxes, him being a Prime and you were part of the guards. While on a mission against the Quintessons, you got hurt and your T-cog got taken, you nearly died! But your beloved soon to be Conjux saved you!
You just... accept it. I mean, you didn't remember anything (but something felt like missing inside of your system). But you didn't mind, you felt safe and loved in Sentinel's hold.
If Sentine Prime was not around because of needing to attend important Prime business, Airachnid is always with you - and she became a sort of... guardian. One who always followed you and kept Sentinel updated about you.
Sentinel blatantly manipulates you whenever you show any type of doubt or consideration on what he says or does. "My sweetspark, please... I nearly lost you one time. And I felt like my spark was going to die. I cannot lose you again, please. I love you so much."
It always works - after all, you don't know exactly who you were once are. Sentinel Prime is everything you have.
"Without me - you are nothing."
A few days after having woken up from your forced induced stasis mode, both of you became the Conjux Endura of each other, everyone on Iacon saw the event and celebrated. Sentinel Prime held you closely, snuzzling his helm softly against the top of yours, keeping one arm wrapped your behind and his free servo holding yours.
And you smile, preciously painted and adorned. But... something still, deep inside of your spark, knows something is wrong. But whenever you see at Sentinel's smile, you can't help but smile back and ignore that uncertain sensation.
After all - You've always been meant to be Sentinel Prime's conjux.
Everything is okay.
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(ノ*ФωФ)ノ Vhaos out!
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endless-ineffabilities ¡ 8 months ago
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The Bolter (part one)
Steve Rogers x f!Reader
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synopsis : Steve carries out his decision to return to Peggy, aiming to live out the rest of his days with her. But this means he's leaving everything behind - he's leaving you. Did he make the right choice? Will there be anything left with you to come back to?
in this chapter : Steve is about to walk out of your life, causing you to let go of everything you two have, and everything that could be.
📝 yes, the title is inspired by Taylor Swift's upcoming song The Bolter. In my interpretation and in this story, it is meant to symbolize someone who runs from someone or something. A potential relationship. A loved one. And the choice is not easy, one that may bring a lot of remorse or catharsis? Anyhow - Steve IS a bolter. In the beginning, at least.
themes/warnings : language, angst!!!, pining, unrequited love, Steve is kind of an asshole for leaving (but we love him anyway)
word count : < 1k
main masterlist ▪︎ series masterlist ▪︎ next chapter
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This is it.
This must be what true heartbreak feels like.
Steve, your best friend and the unrequited love of your life, has decided to volunteer to return the Infinity Stones to their respective timelines. Very noble of him.
But he also confessed that he plans to stay with Peggy, now that he finally has the chance.
They can have the dance that was stolen from them, decades ago.
Steve can be with his true love it seems. And that person is just not you.
Well, fuck my life.
"Doll," he smiles ruefully, both of your hands encased in his, "say something."
Say something, he says. What is there to say - I'm in love with you, I want you to stay with me? Don't leave me? I want you stay - for Bucky, for Sam, for Nat. For everyone. For me?
What can you fucking say that will ever be enough? In the 7 years that you've known Steve, you've grown to love him. As a friend, as family. Then, almost inevitably, as the only keeper of your heart. And he knows this.
But he's still leaving. Because, at the end of the day, Peggy is the keeper of his heart.
To you, Steve has always been everything good. Golden boy perfection, with a heart that would put a saint's to shame. Sunshine, laughter, companionship, standing tall and unwavering in his ideals. His gleaming red, white, and blue tendrils snaking their way into the very fibres of your being and taking root.
But now, all you feel is empty. You were angry, when he first told you, days ago. You had almost screamed at him, told him how unfair he was being. You made a long, drawn-out case for Bucky. How he doesn't deserve this. But really, you were making a case for yourself.
Stay, you had said.
He simply smiled, without any mirth. Not like his usual on-brand Steve Rogers gesture of sincerity. He smiled and it did not reach his eyes. He was sad, or maybe he pitied you. And that made you even angrier.
Until minutes later, when you finally broke down, and sobbed quietly in his arms.
"I hate you," you muttered against the creases of his shirt.
"I love you," he said back, and you hated him even more for it. He doesn't get to say that to you, in that way. Not in the same way he would say to Peggy.
Now, right before stepping onto the platform that will cause him to vanish from your life, he says it again.
"You do know that I love you, right?" His smile is genuine, if not a little nervous. He hoped you would be as accepting as Bucky, and send him off with just a rueful look. A gentle, final word. A sweet farewell that he can take with him as a reminder of all the times you spent together.
"I know," you breathe, relenting. Steve does not like that your eyes are glazed over, empty. Like you're not taking him in at all. You take notice of the resulting sag in his shoulders, out of character from the dignified stride he sported as he was saying goodbye to the others.
A big part of you wants to remain indignant. So what if he's hurt or uncomfortable due to your coldness? It serves him right.
"Come here," he whispers, and it comes across a silent plea. Come here? Will you, please?
You take just one small step closer, but he is already ahead, wrapping his arms around your frame. Your stony mask breaks as your cheek presses against his chest, away from his view. His chest plate glistens from your tears, but you don't have it in you to wipe them away.
When he pulls away to look down at you, his heart breaks. He cradles your face in his hands as you look up at him through wet eyelashes, and it's almost enough to make him consider staying.
But then you say, "It will all be okay, Steve." You gingerly pry his hands from your cheeks, giving them a comforting squeeze. "We will be okay."
You look behind you, where Bucky stands watching the exchange, and he offers an encouraging nod.
You take a step back, mustering everything that you possibly can, all the love you have for Steve, to give him one last genuine smile.
"Go get your girl."
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Read part two here.
The way I was making myself upset while writing this - god I love angst!!! ~~~
I was gonna keep going, make it even more brutal, but I'll save that for the upcoming parts. It will have some Bucky x reader as well 🖤
God Bless America('s ass).
oh, and let me know if you wish to be tagged!
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byunpum ¡ 6 months ago
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Back to you | Part 1
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Pair: Jake(human and avatar) x Neytiri x Human reader (trio couple)
Warning: None, i think kinda sad. More in future, maybe soft-smut in the future.
Note: I'm still alive after disappearing for 1 month. Ahh omg, it's been so long, I'm so sorry. A lot of things have happened, more good than bad. But we're back…and as I had posted. Here I bring you this story, based on my mini-series 'mama's boy'. Here I share with you how our characters are paired up. I hope you like it, and let me know what you think and if I should continue with the mini-series. Love ya <3
+Read 'Mama's boy' HERE+
AVATAR MASTERLIST| Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 (final)
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You were feeling uncomfortable in the metal chair, which was placed next to the bonding machine, which allowed humans to use their avatars. Since the routine expedition, Jake had not returned. Everyone knew he was alive, but where was he? No one knew. Grace had asked you as a favor to monitor him until he returned. You weren't complaining, but you had avoided having any contact with Jake. He reminded you of things…Not even 20 minutes had passed, when the machine made a noise indicating that it would open. You get up from the chair as quickly as you can, to assist Jake. You help him open the lid, finding a confused, sweaty Jake with a stupid grin that made your heart pound. “You won't believe where I am?” says Jake, as you let out a big sigh and shift your gaze to Grace.
“Oh my god…you're back!!!” shouts grace from her desk. Coming towards you, she was already releasing a machine to take jake's blood pressure. “Grace…I'm in” says Jake, the man was lying on his shoulders. He was still a little weak, you force him to drink water from a bottle. Taking his chin to make him open his mouth. While grace looks at him with confusion. “What?” grace continues to work on adjusting the machine on his arm. Jake had been so many hours without using his body, he could pass out at any moment. “Yes…they accepted me. I'm inside their home” jake, looks at you. “You're in the tree home?” you ask. You watch as he nods his face quickly. Grace takes jake's face in her hands, and gives him a warm smile. “I can't believe it…are you serious?!!!” grace was shocked. They had tried to get in, but it was impossible. “I'm with a girl…ahhh netyy ahhh” jake tries to remember and pronounce the name correctly of the girl who is supposed to help him adjust. “Neytiri?” you speak softly, but loud enough for jake to hear you. “Yes her” jake speaks up.
Grace looks at you quickly and she can see the sadness in your gaze. You change your face and mood, moving away from Jake, helping him to put his weight down. Turning away from them, you bump into norm who had approached you moments before. “Are you okay?” norm asks, touching your shoulder, but you push him away. Walking as fast as you could away from them, you wanted to get out of there. You felt short of breath and were wiping away tears hiding your emotion. She was fine. It had been so long since you had heard from her. On the other side a group of friends are confused, “What's wrong with her, did I say something wrong?” asks Jake, looking at Grace. The woman was still looking towards the exit, sighing deeply. “It's a long story…come on out of there you need to rest and tell me everything” says grace, helping Jake into his wheelchair.
Lunchtime came quickly, and the entire team was gathered in the dining room eating dinner. The group of scientists were very excited and focused on every word that came out of Jake's mouth. It had been so long since they had been able to have a connection with the Omaticaya clan. Even grace was giving him their undivided attention. Meanwhile you and norm were standing a little away from the group, eating the disgusting food. You couldn't help but laugh at the look on norm's face, you could tell he was very upset. You kicked his foot a little, “hey get that face away” you scolded him, but you saw how he snapped with his teeth. “I can't stand this… it's a very unfair” norm says. “Unfair?” you ask, as you put a mouthful of food in your mouth. “Yes, Tom has been studying for 3 years and I've been studying for over 6 years…and where am I? sitting here, doing nothing. In fact, if anyone in the whole RDA deserved to be with the omaticaya clan, it's you. You've been in pandora all your life…you're part of the clan” speaks norm annoyed, seeing how you interrupt him with your index finger. “Ah ah was…past!!!” you speak, lowering your gaze for a moment. Some memories come to your head, yes, it was very true what norm said, you were once part of the omaticaya clan…but it's been so long. Maybe… they have forgotten about you. “Norm…I understand your discomfort, but there's nothing we can do, the pretty boy was lucky to be accepted” you joke, seeing Norm's disgusted face. “Jake pretty boy?!!!! You have to be crazy” you laugh loudly, looking at the group of scientists who were still harassing jake. “Well…you were tom's girlfriend, that says a lot about you” Norm says, now he was the one laughing at you. “We weren't boyfriend and girlfriend…we just spent a few nights together” you speak up, laughing with your friend.
While you and Norm were still laughing, for a moment you see Jake look at you and give you a smile. You return it, seeing how jake makes a help signal with his hands. You laugh even harder, but you feel Norm pinch you “don't be fooled by the enemy” says Norm “Norm let me go!!!” you roll your eyes back. Norm could sometimes be very very annoying. But you were used to it, he had always been like that.
You remember when norm and tom came to pandora. Just for their studies, and you were the first to meet them. From then on… you had grown very fond of them. When the news that tom had been killed reached your ears, you were heartbroken, again…but you got over it little by little. But with the new member of the group, it wasn't very easy. Since Jake had arrived, he hadn't taken his interest in you, and to make things worse for you. Grace had delegated all responsibility for Jake's avatar to you, so if anything happened to him it was your fault. And the last thing you wanted was for a $20 million dollar avatar to happen to him, or else the RDA was going to kill you.
After the meal, and when everyone was about to go to their respective rooms. Norm had gone ahead walking as fast as he could through the cold corridors of the RDA. You were walking more calmly, plus you wanted to meet Jake. You felt you owed him an apology for leaving him alone. By pure chance you find him, you see that he was talking something with Quaritch. You look at him with concern, if you knew one thing, it was that quaritch never had good intentions, if he wasn't given anything in return. When you see both men stop talking, you decide to approach jake. “Hello” you speak softly, catching the man's attention. Jake turns around, with a small smile. Lifting his gaze. “I'm all ears” jake says. You had barely spoken to jake since he arrived, so you were a little nervous. “One question…ahh where did you leave my avatar?” you ask. “Your avatar? It's in a safe place” jake says. “Yeah, but what safe place?” you wanted him to be more literal, because his concept of safety might be very different from yours. “I'm sleeping in some kind of giant leaf…ahh I don't remember” jake speaks up, shuffling his hair.there was a short silence between the two of you, but you decide to speak. “You're in the big tree?” you speak. Jake can see your eyes light up for a moment. “Yes…that. There I am” jake can see you kneel down in front of him, and move much closer. Placing your hands on his knees. As if whatever you were going to ask him, you didn't want anyone else to hear. “And how did you see everything? Is everyone okay?” you ask. “Yeah…normal, there's only one who seems to be a bother and he's warrior…I don't remember his name” jake says and can see how you smile softly. “That's tsu'tey” you speak. “That same one, do you know him?” jake gets closer to your face, and you quickly push him away. “Ahh thank you for answering me…see you tomorrow” you get up quickly, and leave quickly. Before you continue walking to your room, you stop “By the way…sorry for leaving you alone when you wake up, next time I'll take better care of you” you apologize, and turn to continue on your way.
Jake stood there confused, he thought you looked kind of strange. But cute…very cute. He could understand his brother now. Laughing to himself, he started on his way to his room. Although he must admit that he found it even stranger, that you knew the name of that navi. It was assumed that only people who have an avatar have had contact with the Omaticayas, and he understands that not all of them have. How did you know that?
The next day came quickly, and Jake had almost no time to wake up…because he had to get up early. Wiping his eyes, he was already sitting on the edge of the connection machine. “Good morning” you hummed, approaching him. You had a cup of coffee in your hands, offering it to him with some vitamins. “Good morning gorgeous” jake chuckles, as he can as norm makes a dirty face. “Here…you'll need this” you hand him the stuff. “And this?” jake asks. “It's some vitamins that will help your body not collapse from not eating all day and a coffee” you speak, as you practically force jake to take it all. Grace approaches you, accompanied by Norm. “Well, here's the information,” says Grace, showing Jake a screen. On it was all of neytiri's information. You come to Jake's side, looking at the screen with a warm smile. “Please don't disrespect her….y do not be a jerk” norm speaks, giving jake a dirty look. “You're just upset because I'm the one going on a date with the leader's daughter” jake says in a mocking voice. Grace rolls her eyes and tells you to take care of hooking Jake up. As jake lies down, you approach him. “ Advice…don't try to flirt with neytiri” you speak up. Watching as jake raises an eyebrow, and laughs a little. “There you go…and how do you know that?” he speaks. You now give him a big smile, but one of sarcasm. “I know why I say that” you speak, as you turn away from jake. “You should listen to her,” Grace shouts from the distance. “Good luck…soldier” you speak, being the last face jake saw to wake up in his avatar body.
And yes, jake should take your advice, you knew neytiri more than anyone. And yes you were hating the fact that he could be with her. It had been so many years since you last saw her, you didn't even get to say goodbye…nothing. The last time you saw Neytiri was when that tragedy happened at school. You sigh a little, as you begin to prepare the week's paperwork. But your thoughts are interrupted when you feel grace sit down next to you. “I have good news… a new project is coming out tomorrow,” says Grace. You look at her curiously. “Project?” you ask. Grace's face ascends. “Yes…we need to be closer to the clan, a place we are safe, but we can still get on with the project 'jakesully” says grace, watching you laugh. “I was able to convince the RDA idiots to have a bunker, where we can have a team, a small lab. i'm counting on you, right?” grace looks at you with a raised eyebrow, waiting for your answer. “Can I refuse?” you speak, feeling Grace hug you and press a kiss to your hair. “It'll be for the best… we'll have a great time, no personal space” grace jokes, as you groan loudly.
And as if by magic, within a week you were in the bunker in the middle of the jungle. Norm, grace, judy, jake and you. Although judy came and went from time to time to get everything you needed. Even though she used to get away so often, she was part of the team. You adjusted too quickly, it seemed to be comfortable. And the comfort you felt around Jake was increasing too, and very quickly. This seemed to be nice for grace, she liked to see you happy and excited about something or someone…it had been a long time since she had seen you like this. Watching from afar, as you wiped jake's face with a wet rag. “I'm not a baby” says Jake, as you wipe his eyes. While you hold your face with both hands. “Yeah but you're barely taking care of yourself…I know your avatar body is amazing, but you're here” you touch his chest and feel his heart. “Can you feel it moving? It's that fast for you “ jake jokes, watching you laugh and turn away from him. “That was the worst thing you've said so far” norm complains from behind you, as he sips his coffee.
You liked it when jake would go back to his body in the afternoon, and do his video documentaries. And you could listen to everything he had learned, plus he would also tell you everything he had done with neytiri. “It's just that it's hard to use the bow…it's” Jake would explain with his hands, you could see the frustration in his eyes and gestures. Neytiri could be very rude at times, but that was the way it was and he had to learn. “The trick is to put pressure on the back arm” you move, and show him the pose. “And boom…done” you joke. Jake shakes his head to the side, watching as you continue to explain how he should do things. Just like neytiri was doing, they were explaining almost identically. Jake leans forward and brushes a strand of hair away from your face. Tucking it behind your ear. “Thank you” you speak timidly, now pulling away. “Thank you for helping me” jake says.
Since you had gotten closer to him, he had improved so much with the lessons with neytiri. If she told him something, he would ask you as soon as he returned to his human body. And you answered him without hesitation, sometimes he didn't understand how you knew so much about the clan. Only grace and a few avatars were supposed to have had contact with the clan, norm could know some things. But you were an expert. And your advice is really paying off. Now jake was in his avatar body, he was holding the bow again, and he remembered what you had said to him. “Neytiri was asking you to put strength in your arms, so you will be more accurate in your shooting” jake remembered your words, he adjusted his stance. Neytiri was approaching him, but stopped short. When she noticed Jake's stance, she stood watching him. Seeing how the shot was perfect. “Well done” says neytiri, watching as jake smiles at her. She was wondering how he had improved overnight. But if she could tell, it was the technique jake was using…it was very similar to yours. Neytiri tries to distract herself and keeps walking towards the prey.
For a moment during the day, the two of them had sat down in a nice quiet meadow to eat something to eat…neytiri was minding her own business eating her food. But she could feel jake's gaze, he might change his gaze once or twice. But he would look back at her. “ What are you looking at so much?” speaks neytiri without taking her eyes off her fruit. Jake remains thoughtful for a moment. “That necklace around your neck” jake points to the woven necklace neytiri had around her neck, she touches it while looking at it warmly. “What is it?” jake asks, but he thinks he knows the answer. The reason he's asking is because the night before, when he came over to fix your hair. He could see you had that same necklace, he wanted to believe it was something grace gave you. But today he noticed the same one on Neytiri and was surprised. They were identical. “This…” neytiri holds her necklace tightly. “This is a memory of her” neytiri says, she stops eating for a moment. She could look thoughtful, like she was remembering someone. “Her?” asks jake. Neytiri looks at him slowly, you could see her little teary eyes. But she gets up suddenly, “Come on…we have a lot of things to do” says neytiri. Jake stands up behind her, and catches her hand to stop her for a second. “Neytiri…are you okay?” the boy asks. Neytiri squeezes jake's hand for a moment, looking down and taking a deep breath. “Yes,” she says. Starting to walk to a new route, but Jake could tell how she didn't let go of his grip and continued to hold his hand tightly. Jake didn't refuse at any point, neytiri is not very affectionate to say the least, and the fact that she was still holding his hand. It meant that she needs him right now.
That same afternoon, when jake and neytiri came home from training, they had lunch with the whole clan. And lay down to rest in their respective places, neytiri waited a few minutes to carefully lift her head and see if jake had finally fallen asleep. She had her home with her parents, being still single, neytiri could live with her parents. But right now, she had the task of training and taking care of Jake. So she had to be wherever he was. Neytiri notices how Jake is asleep. Getting up from her hammock, to walk carefully in the branches. Leaving the resting area, running carefully to her ikran. “sense…come on” says neytiri, climbing into her ikran quickly. flying away from the familiar tree, she hopes no one was following her, because she was heading to a place she only knew about.
Not far away, there was a very tall tree. Too tall to be anything but scary for anyone to come and interrupt. Neytiri leads Seze to a giant branch, which had a beautiful view of the jungle of Pandora. Neytiri climbs down from the ikran, stroking the creature's head, stretching a little. To approach the tree trunk, picking up a small bag. Now to sit on the edge of the branch. She sighs a little, looking at the scenery. Opening the bag, and taking out of it a piece of paper. Very carefully she unfolds it and laughs to see what was drawn on it.
A cute doodle drawing…on it were two girls. Neytiri laughs to herself, as she touches the paper wistfully. “I hope you never forget me…my Y/N” Neytiri speaks softly. Hugging the paper carefully, this was the only thing I had of you.
What do you think? should I continue? btw, If you want to be tagged, let me know.<3
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fieldofdaisiies ¡ 10 months ago
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Scars Like Mine
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paring: Azriel x Reader | type: angst | words: 3,3k | warnings: this story explores a little darker themes, like childhood trauma and fire, so please, read with caution. playlist: hurts | scars to your beautiful | beauty marks | stronger | fly with me
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“Where did you get those from?”
Azriel startles, both at the little voice talking to him and the soft touch against his hand. It is featherlight, almost like a gust of wind and feels so odd in a place like this. In front of him, is the barren landscape of the Illyrian mountains, around him the eerie war camp, frigid and somber. 
The shadowsinger’s gaze drops immediately and he‘s met with big, brown eyes that belong to a tiny girl, barely reaching to his knee. Her wings are tightly tucked in. She is wearing a dark blue wool hat that has a few holes in it, and a jacket that looks far too big for her small frame. 
Shock runs deep the moment he sees that half her face and also the exposed part of her neck is marred by scars, very similar to those on his hands. But despite those scars, there is a smile on her lips. One that seems so bright within the darkness of this camp. 
Azriel’s throat is all of a sudden so dry and constricts when he wants to talk. A cold shiver curls around his spine, and his knees tremble. What could have possibly been done to her? Where did she get the scars from?
Finally he crouches down, his hand still in the hold of the little Illyrian girl. He is nearly on eye level with her when his lips part to say something, anything, but she beats him to it.
“From fire?” Her eyes open wider, and curiosity sparks within the deep chocolate brown. Her lower lip, though, trembles slightly. “Like mine?”
Slowly, Azriel’s chin dips, his chest squeezing and his heart beating in a sad rhythm. He has accepted so, but hearing it out loud hurt. He feels tremendously bad for every child who had to experience a similar fate to what he had to go through and telling by the amount of scars she has on her body, the fire she had to face wasn’t a small one.  
“Do they still hurt?” She flips Azriel’s hand in hers, the back of it exposed now, and trails her little index finger over one particularly bad and deep scar. 
“Not that much,” Azriel says in a calm, soft voice. “Only in winter when my hands are so dry.” He smiles at her and the little girl nods, a pensive look on her face.
“Mine do too,” she finally says after a moment. “You need to put cream on them. My mummy always puts cream on my skin. I can ask her if she can help you, too?” Her smile widens a little, her eyes looking so hopefully that tears brim Azriel’s.
But the mention of her mummy—Azriel suddenly realises that the girl is all alone, in the middle of the war camp. 
“Where is your mother? Why are you here all alone?”
A cold breeze blows through the war camp, and Azriel notices that other than a few Illyrian brutes the little girl is completely alone (now with him, and he would of course protect her, but otherwise she is alone).
“Mummy picks up our laundry. I am waiting for her here. She is right in there.” Using her index finger, she points at the building behind Azriel and a breath of relief leaves the shadowsinger. 
Thank the Cauldron, she isn’t alone and her mother is close. Azriel’s tense shoulders visible relax, wings slouching to the ground.
The little girl drops his hand and looks at him in shock, eyes wide open, lips parted. “Careful!” she cautions. “Never drag them over the ground, there are pebbles and stones, you might get hurt.”
This is all it needed for a single tear to break the damn and slide out of his eye. Azriel releases a shuddering breath and says, “Oh thank you so much for the warning.” He quickly tucks in his wings, straightens up and smiles at her.
It is most definitely something her mummy has told her, and Azriel has to smile at the thought. A mother who truly looks after her child…
“She taught me how to fly when no one would,” the girl tells Azriel. “They thought I couldn’t fly with my crippled wing.” She lifts her right wing to show it to Azriel, the thin black membrane also adorned with the same scars that grace her skin. 
Azriel swallows thickly, his jaw clenching so hard it almost hurts. “But I‘m sure you proved them wrong.”
The corners of her mouth lift. “I did. I can actually fly really well.” A joyful grin spreads over her face and a kernel of pride blooms in Azriel’s chest — of course she can and of course she showed all the Illyrian fuckers that despite her wing being marred by scars it doesn’t stop her from flying. 
“Do you like flying?” he asks, still in his crouched position but now with his wings neatly tucked in behind his broad shoulders.
The girl shrugs and then inhales deeply. “I like it, but I‘m often not allowed to. Only when mummy has time.”
That makes sense. She is very young and letting her fly alone would be much too risky. Azriel nods slowly and braces his hands on his thighs. He makes a mental note to buy cream, although the mention of someone else taking care of his hands sounded so very wonderful. But obviously he could never accept that offer.
“What is your name?” the little Illyrian asks and brings Azriel back to the moment.
“Azriel,” he answers and likes that here in Illyria where somehow everyone knows him, she doesn’t know who he is. 
“I like this name.” She smiles and bounces on her toes, reaching for a shadow that curls towards her. “Do they have a name as well?”
Azriel has to chuckle at that. She is incredibly adorable and somehow talking to her, and her treating him like any other person and not showing a hint of fear, does something to his heart. And to his eyes. He clears his throat and says, “Unfortunately not. They are just my shadows.”
One of them now curls around her finger and it makes her giggle.
Azriel‘s gaze drops to her shoes. They seem a little too small and old and dirty. One is not fully intact, and it makes him sad. 
Quickly, he asks, “But, do you have a name?” in order to not overthink why she might be wearing those old shoes. It would break his heart.
“Of course, I do. My name is—”
“Elia!” A female voice calls and Azriel looks over his shoulder and is met with a female of beauty he has never seen before. You drop the basket with laundry you have held before and run towards him and Elia.
There is terror in your voice, and horror etched upon your features and Azriel quickly straightens up. He lifts his hands but you completely ignore him. All your attention on the little girl. “Elia! I told you to stay close to the building!”
You are so scared. So incredibly worried and terrified and Azriel’s shadows sense it, tell him.
“I don’t mean any harm or danger—”
“I don’t care. She isn’t supposed to talk to any Illyrian brute!” you snap and finally meet his gaze, your arm sliding around your little girl’s shoulders, pulling her to you. 
You have never seen a male of such beauty before and— he is the High Lord’s shadowsinger. But that doesn’t matter. After everything that has happened to you —to her— you can’t risk anything. Never, ever again. What has been done to you in Ironcrest—
Your breath catches, but before either of you can say anything, Elia opens her mouth. “He has scars like me, mummy.”
Your stomach could, and your throat works around a swallow. “I am very sorry to hear that,” you finally say and your gaze brushes his again. A cold smile is on his face, but other than that there is just empathy. No hint of cruelty, or 
“He also got them from fire,” Elia adds and looks up at you with her big brown eyes, her lips pouted. “Just like me, mummy.”
“Oh baby.” You brush your hand over her head and then turn to address Azriel again. “I’m sorry that this happened to you as well. And I’m sorry for snapping at you earlier. Thank you for keeping her safe while I was gone.”
Azrirl bows his head. He technically didn‘t do anything, Azriel thinks and says, “Nothing to thank me for.” 
“But there is.” The sincerity within his eyes is proof enough that you really mean and he can sense your gratitude. After what has probably happened to your little girl, no risk could be taken.
“Do you want to have dinner with us, Azriel?”
“Elia!” you reprimand with a chuckle. She and her big mouth. But she is so joyful and so hopeful and seeing your little daughter happy is the greatest gift the Mother could ever give you. She has finally met someone with scars like hers, and you would love to invite him, solely to thank him for looking after her while you were inside the laundry place. 
He didn’t mean any harm and was kind to her which is a rarity for Illyrian males up here. 
But he works for the High Lord, you doubt he has time for such mundane things as having dinner with you and your daughter. 
“I’m sorry, she is always so straightforward. I would love to invite you to have dinner with us to thank you looking after her, but I totally understand if you are too busy and don’t have time to– ”
“I would love to have dinner with you. Only if it is alright for you, of course,” Azriel interrupts you and smiles a little sheepishly. “But there is absolutely nothing to thank me for. I didn’t do anything.”
Still holding onto your daughter, you step a little closer to him, gaze honest and sincere when it locks with his. “You did. You made her feel protected and safe. She wouldn’t have talked to you otherwise.” You swallow, and mean every word you say. It is the truth. “And you made her smile and I will forever thank anyone who does so.” Reaching out, you grab his hand and squeeze it lightly. 
What has been done to her can never ever be changed again, but every day forward and every little smile on her face, cures a little bit of the pain. And whoever helps you two in going forward and bringing her happiness, has a place within your heart. 
Azriel now also closes his fingers, naturally curling them around your hand. He wants to say something, anything, just so he can look at you a little longer without making it seem weird. But he doesn’t have to say anything, Elia does the job for him. 
“And after dinner, you have to put my cream on his hands as well. Azriel told me that in winter his scars also hurt a lot.”
⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ˖
“Don’t, please, I can do that.” Your cheeks flush again at his closeness and how helpful he is. You are not used to behaviour like this from other Illyrian males and so you appreciate it greatly. 
Azriel places the plates in the sink and smiles at you. “Please, allow me to help you.” Lastly, he collects Elia’s empty glass, leaving yours and his own on the table, both still filled with a bit of wine. When everything is in the sink he collects a cloth and cleans the table. 
Dinner was wonderful and Elia asked Azriel many questions about his scars but also his shadows and if he likes to fly and what he likes most about flying. He answered each one of her questions, making your heart thrum happily within your chest. 
You know he didn’t tell her the real story about his scars, having seen the look in his eyes. Despite being grateful for it for sparing her the worst details, your stomach has been twisting and coiling since he started with his story. What could have possibly happened to him?
Elia didn’t want to go to bed when it was time for her (actually she stayed up even an hour longer than she is used to, but you allowed her to do so, loving how she thrived in Azriel’s presence, finally having met someone who shares the same past with fire as she does. 
She was almost asleep at the table, chin resting on her hand when you picked her up, cradled her to her chest. “Good night, Azriel, and thank you for sharing your story with me,” she said to the shadowsinger and smiled at him. 
Azriel said her in return, “Thank you for inviting me to dinner and remember all these scars are just proof of how strong you are.” This brought tears to your eyes. 
By the time you reached her room and laid her down she was already asleep. 
He sits down at the table again and you claim the spot beside him, a shy smile on your lips and a small jar of cream for his scars in your hands. 
“We are not from here actually,” you start and loose a long breath, lifting your eyes to meet his hazle ones. “Elia and I come from Ironcrest. After the fire, we fled. Ironcrest was no longer safe for us. My…my ex-husband wanted us gone, thinking I betrayed him and that Elia was not from him. It was utter bullshit, I would have never cheated on him, but his mind told him other things.” 
Your throat constricts as the memories replay in your mind and a shuddering breath leaves you. You close your eyes for a second and suddenly feel a soft touch against your hand. 
“You continue when you are ready,” Azriel whispers, his hand gently placed upon yours. Your lids flicker open and with a look full of gratitude, you meet his eyes and slowly bow your head. 
“Elia had to pay the price for it. I collected some last things for our departure when he set our house on fire. She wasn’t fast enough. I wasn’t fast enough. I wasn’t there fast enough. When I returned I saw the massive flames. It is all I can remember, and Elia’s cries. How she sobbed and wailed and how I held her and dragged her outside. And I–”
“But you were.” He squeezes your hand. “She wouldn’t be here today, if you had been too late. There is no blame on you. She got out of the fire before it was too late. You saved her. You, alone as a young Illyrian female, fled the camp and came here to give her a better life.”
His words…
Tears run out of your eyes and you flip your hand over, cradling it tightly and then lifting it. You bring his hand to your lips and kiss his knuckles. “No one has ever made me see the past like this. I’ve always blamed myself.” You swallow around the ache in your throat, tears tasting salty on your lips. “I should have stayed with her. Not left her alone.”
“You can’t always expect the worst and you arrived there in time,” Azriel breathes, stroking his thumb over the back of your hand, his own eyes glassy, tears visible in the corners of them. “You did all you could, and do so every day. Don’t be so hard on yourself, I know you are a great mother.”
Gratitude fills every fibre of your body, and through your tears you smile at him. “Thank you, and please,” –you have to chuckle– “this time just allow him to thank you.”
He dips his chin, the shadows around him that have been calm before, now swirling quite vividly around their owner. 
Azriel reaches out the hand that is not held by yours, and uses his thumb to brush away some tears and then tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “You are allowed to thank me, but only if I am allowed to say that Elia most definitely has the best mother in all of Prythian.”
You close your eyes when new tears start to bubble up. You want to shake your head at him, but his palm is placed against your cheek, his thumb stroking over the damp skin. 
“And most definitely also the most beautiful mother in the entire world.” His smile brightens and there is so much honesty within his eyes, you really believe him that he means it. It does something to your heart and to your soul, starting to glow deep within your chest. 
Your cheeks heat, probably also turning bright red and so you need to change the topic. 
“Now let me take care of your hands.” You let go of one of his hands so you can reach for the small jar. Azriel also lowers his own hand, humming in approval. 
“And while you do so, maybe you want to tell me the real story of what happened to them?”
Sadness and pain passes over his face replacing the former lightness. He says nothing for a long moment. You give him time, the same he gave you before, and unscrew the jar, scooping up a bit of the cool cream with two fingers. 
Gently, you apply it to the back of his hand, softly starting to apply it to the rough surface. 
“My step-brothers thought it would be interesting to test my Illyrian healing powers. They held me, poured oil over my hands and set them on fire. When my father’s warriors arrived, it was already too late, the damage has been done.”
Shock knocks the breath from you. How could people be so cruel? How could your own family do something like this?
“I am so sorry.”
“It is alright,” he whispers. Azriel enjoys the soft touch of your hands and what you do to him too much to allow himself to dwell on past memories and those haunting experiences. He wants to revel in the feeling of your hands on his forever. 
“But it isn’t,” you insist. “It never is. I hope they paid for it?” You lift your gaze to meet his, and move on to his other hand, gently taking it into yours while beginning to work a bit of the leftover cream into his skin before scooping up some more. 
“They did,” he assures you and releases a long sigh, visibly relaxing in his chair. “Your hands work wonders.”
A little giggle leaves you, letting your fingers glide over his, intertwining them for a split second. “I assume you need to come here more often then?”
“Is this an invitation?” With a small smirk on his lips, Azriel raises his brow at you. 
“I’m sure Elia would appreciate it greatly.” You smile at him. 
Azriel leans forward a bit and your breath catches, heart hammering against your ribcage. For most part of your life, you have feared males, avoided them like the plague except for the male you one day had to marry but who is now your ex-husband. It is different with Azriel. You like being near him despite not even really knowing him. But you like to be in his presence, to talk to him, to touch him. It is something new, and something that surprises you but it is a welcome feeling. You like it. And he even has the bonus that also Elia likes him and feels safe and secure in his presence.
“And her mother?” Azriel says in a voice that is an octave lower, almost like a velvety brush against your skin. “Would she like to see me again?”
You grin at him, some tears having dried on your cheeks by now. “She would love to see you again.”
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tags (crossed-out I couldn't tag) : @juulle987 @marimorena06 @danikasthings @younxii@nightcourtwritings @mrofontaine @lunalilyf @whor-3-crux @tired-all-the-time @anni-was-here @ummmmmwat @azbracadabra @j-pendragonx @hollyismentallyillhelp @famousbasementpainter @bsenpai @lena-davina @red-highlady @thesugatoyourtae @azrielsbabyg @aroseinvelaris @moony-thoughts @wrensical003 @cherryjain17 @moonfawnx @crushedcloudsx @devilsfoodcake22  @valeridarkness @azrielscertifiedslut @mulansaucey @cynicalpotato95 @hanasakr @high-bi-andreadytocry @eerievixen @feyretopia @moonlightazriel @randomness-it-is @brekkershadowsinger @eliieee23 @girasoli-e-sorrisi @illyrianvalkyriecarynthian  @kennedy-brooke @highladyofillyria @theworthlessqueen @marina468 @topaz125 @illyrian-dreamer @azriels-mate123 @eos-princess @courtofjurdan @a-frog-with-a-laptop @insufferablebookaddict @callmeblaire
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satxnsupreme666 ¡ 1 month ago
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You don’t need to be alone anymore: Agatha Harkness/Agnes x fem!reader
Masterlist
Requested by: @midnight-lestrange
Summary: You´re a lonely witch who was never accepted in any coven because everyone was afraid of your dark powers, you got used to live alone for many centuries, but when you meet Agatha in Westview you fall in love with her, you´re scared of getting attached to her so you try to ignore her, but Agatha never gives up.
Words: 7k+
Warnings: Angst but fluff in the end.
Author´s note: Hi, this was a requested story, I do not know if I should tag the people who requested at the time, I want to be respectful, so I am not sure if I should tag them, I will try and do it since it was their request and their idea and if any of the people who requested back at the time now feel uncomfortable being tagged, please let me know and I will delete the tag.
This was one of the first stories I wrote three years ago, I had posted them on Tumblr on my old account, but due to my mental health, I had to take a break from Tumblr and the toxicity and hate that had suddenly increased, I deleted all of my stories and my old account, now I have decided to upload them again here on Tumblr and also on Ao3.
Again, as this was one of the first stories I wrote for Agatha Harkness is a little bit short, I will be uploading the rest of the stories from time to time, I have to edit them and make sure they are legible enough and with not a lot of grammatical errors.
I hope you like it!
If you enjoy, could you comment, like or reblog? it would help a lot really ♥️
Taglist: @midnight-lestrange  @eliscannotdance
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Doing everything on your own wasn’t a big deal for you, passing all your life alone had made you stronger, you didn’t need anyone in your life and you were alright by just being on your own.
At least that was what you kept telling yourself at nights when sometimes the only thing that you needed was a hug.
The feeling of a hug someone had gave to you felt so far away, almost like a dream as if it was something unreal, dreaming about the feeling deep down you craved the most.
But then just as the thoughts of needing comfort came to your mind they quickly vanished too.
Now that you were trapped in Westview playing the role Wanda had given to you it wasn’t too hard.
The fact that Wanda had given you the role of a lonely girl living by herself and from time to time having to attend to Dottie’s meetings wasn’t a hard thing to do, it was not far from who you really were, so it was not a big thing to do.
Eastview was a really grey and kind of a sad place to live in, it had been some centuries ago when you arrived to the town, by the time you first stepped in, it wasn’t even called like that, and it was a really good thing that there were no other witches around when you arrived.
Witches were afraid of you because of you dark powers, and not just a few witches, centuries ago you had looked for a safe coven to be part of and at first, they all had accepted you with open arms but just as soon as they saw your powers, they became afraid.
Being the daughter of a witch who had practiced dark magic for most of her life well, you had inherited dark magic as well, you were not sure how that was possible but it had happened and you couldn’t get rid of your magic.
You really didn’t understand why all of the other witches were so afraid, you were not a bad person and you thought that you could help people even if you had dark powers, but your opinion didn’t matter to them, they just wanted you away from them and that hurt a lot.
Going from coven to coven with high hopes that maybe in the next one they would help you control and understand your magic, but none of that happened, no one wanted you near, so you just accepted your faith.
You realized no one would ever be there for you and no one would ever stand up for you, so you decided that you didn’t need someone and that no one would ever hurt you or abandon you again, this time you would ignore everyone.
Two days ago, when Wanda arrived at Eastview you sensed her magic and before you could even understand what was going on, everything changed, your house and your clothing had changed too and, in your mind, there were pictures of a different life you had never had.
You quickly understood what was going on, someone was trying to implant fake memories but your magic was stronger than this new magic, so this didn’t get to you.
Wanda’s magic hadn’t affected your mind but it looked like it had affected all of the inhabitants of what was now called Westview, you found it interesting how this could have been possible? You brushed the thought off maybe it was not so bad.
The clothes were pretty cool and maybe a little change in the town wasn’t so bad, you just had to play along the memories that were supposed to be real and you even got a new name as well as everyone, but you were a bit curious, had the personality of your neighbors changed as well or did it remain the same?
It was kind of late and you wanted to rest, and according to your new memories and the calendar tomorrow you had a meeting at the club so tomorrow you would find what else had changed.
Now you were just waking up and the weather was nice also you will have a meeting with other girls so now you would know what really was going on, feeling quite excited to know what else was new you prepared yourself for the day and after getting everything done and giving a final check at yourself in the mirror you left your house, walking down the street you already knew where you were walking as if there had been always this club and you had attended hundreds of times, yes it was weird but at the same time interesting.
Arriving at the club you noticed that just three women were sitting in the poolside benches but you were sure the others would arrive at any moment, so you just sat at one of the chairs that formed kind of a circle.
One thing you noticed was that the other residents had a dim red light around them, if you put enough attention you would see it around them that’s how you know they were being controlled.
When everybody start to arrive at the chairs you noticed they were walking behind Sarah and they were talking to her as if she was a celebrity, so her role was to be in charge of everything and the other women just followed her, you found this funny, Sarah was usually nice to you but sometimes she could be a little mean to other people but actually she was not that bossy so you didn’t mind, still you wanted to know more.
You were looking at all the other women and how some of them were acting far from how they really were, some of them used to be really nice and now they were just like some kind of mean girls, one of them was really shy when normally she would be making everybody laugh, you were so focused on examining everything that you didn’t notice some sitting right next you.
Now you just learned that Sarah’s new name was Dottie and everyone wanted her validation, even though you found this funny you were not a person who would usually express how you were feeling, it was something you had learnt to cover over the years.
The meeting kept going mostly with Dottie speaking all the time you were really not paying attention until you heard someone at your side
“This might help a little” Your heard someone saying that beside you and when you turned your head to look at the owner of the voice you saw a woman with dark-brown hair showing you what it looked like a small alcohol container, you were trying hard not to laugh but her comment had been really funny, you just looked at her and tried to ignore her quickly putting your attention or at least you tried to, back at Dottie, but what it was interesting is that this woman didn’t have the red tint around herself, also you had never seen her, but you tried to ignore that fact too.
After 10 minutes later you heard the same voice of the pretty woman whispering again
“Really, how is anybody doing this sober?” This time you had to bit your lip not to laugh, she was really funny, but you had to maintain a serious face.
You noticed this woman was eyeing you by the corner of your eye, she was looking at you, she was trying to see any type of reaction at her words, she was interested and just as you notice the red mist around the people, she had noticed the same and she could see that you didn’t have any, and by the time she was entering the club she felt a strong magic coming from the place, it was dark but at the same time she didn’t feel any type of danger coming from this magic.
When she noticed you sitting in the chair, she became aware that the power was coming from you, it was strong, how could Wanda not notice it? Well, she was immersed in her own made up world so it would be hard for her to notice there was something different around this town.
She wanted to catch your attention but you seemed like you were not interested in her at all.
Finally when the meeting finished you saw Dottie walking towards you and you wondered what she wanted, maybe a little help with the organization of the talent show, you noticed that the two women next to you were still sitting there, the woman who said the funny comments and the other one, now you could see the other woman you realized she had been the one who had changed everything in the town, you could feel her power and the same red mist that emanated from her.
“Sweety would you like to help decorating the place?” Asked Dottie, you nodded you really didn’t have anything else to do and this was quite interesting.
“Hey Dottie I can help her to decorate the place, many hands can do better things than just a pair” The humorous woman said winking at you, deep down you were laughing internally but physically you just sighed and kept looking at Dottie
“Great, now my favorite girl won´t be alone, right?” It was curious, Sarah the real person, when she first met you she wanted to get close to you, she wanted to be your friend but of course you didn’t want that the story of someone leaving you would repeat again, so you just acted cold towards her and in the end she decided to distance herself, but now with the new personality, Dottie treated you like when she first met you.
“ OH, her favorite girl huh? Why is that, are you two, you know?” Said the dark-brown haired woman with a smirk in her face, Dottie just rolled her eyes at her
“Now Agnes that doesn’t concern you” So her name is or more like her role was to be Agnes, you thought, who was she really?
“So now that Agnes offered, you two can deck out the garden and I will make sure that everything concerning the chairs and the tables is in order” You nodded saw that while Dottie was leaving the woman that was next to Agnes followed Dottie.
You were about to leave to go to the place where everything was supposed to take place and you felt a hand on your shoulder.
“Now darling I think we have a lot to talk, don´t we? We really don´t have to decorate anything it was just something Wanda-“ Agnes pointed at the woman with the red hair before speaking again
“Wanda made Dottie say, I think she wanted to talk to her alone, you´ll see there will be more people decorating, now I need to talk to you, let´s go to a more private place away from Wanda, shall we?” So now you understood that she knew you were aware, you saw her stretching out her arm, it looked like she wanted you to link her arm with hers, you were not about to do it.
“Let´s go to a different place but please do not link your arm with me, we can just walk side by side, but that´s all, alright?” You started to walk towards the exit and you didn’t see Agatha squinting her eyes to look at you, she was curious, you were a little different, and she wanted to know what was going on with you, how had you ended up here in Westview and how you had dark magic.
Agnes placed herself next to you, she was a little taller than you and she eyed you again, she didn’t understand why you were such a serious person.
“Maybe we could go to my house darling, no one will interrupt us there, is that alright with you?” You just nodded you really didn’t have anything to lose.
Agnes guided the walk you just followed her through the streets, her house was not so far from the club.
Arriving at her front porch she opened the door and let you in first, you found this very cute and charming from her part but you were not about to say that to her you also tried to hide the slight blush that appeared in your face.
She smirked she could swear she had seen you blush but she decided not to say anything.
Agnes closed her door and she saw you standing there in her living room, you looked lost.
“You can sit darling this will take some time” You nodded again and decided to sit in one of the couches, just when you sat down Agnes went to what you guessed was the kitchen, you took a deep breath and tried to stay calm, rubbing your hands against your dress trying to soothe yourself, being around Agnes who is a really pretty woman you couldn’t help but to be nervous, although you were pretty good at hiding what you were actually feeling, when you heard her footsteps coming closer you sat straight and put on your serious face.
“Here you have sweetheart a glass of cold lemonade, I did it myself” She said handing to you the glass, you took it from her and took a quick sip, it was great.
“Thank you” You said without looking at her, she waited some minutes, waiting to see if you were going to say something else, but when she realized you were not going to say something else, Agnes sighed.
“Alright I can see you´re a quiet girl, but that´s alright I have a lot to say for both of us” She said looking at you all the time, you just nodded and finally you stared at her, now that you were looking cautiously you noticed how pretty her blue eyes were, she was really pretty and her power was really strong you could sense it, you felt drawn to it, maybe because her powers were like yours, both of your came from dark magic.
Agnes sat herself in the couch in front of you, never taking her eyes off you.
“My real name is Agatha Harkness, buttercup, and I´m a witch but I´m pretty sure you already know that, I can sense your power, is strong, really strong and I can feel the darkness coming from you, but I´m curious dear, I don´t feel any danger coming from your magic, what is it? Who are you? Just a few witches are brave enough to embrace the beauty of dark magic”
You were lost for words, she was not afraid of your magic, she was interested and everything she had said about dark magic was simply beautiful, no one had ever spoken about dark magic like her, you felt something breaking inside you, you wanted to tell her everything, suddenly you just wanted to tell her so she could hold you, denying yourself a simply thing like a hug for centuries now was taking its toll on you, you just wanted someone to hold you.
Agatha never stopped watching you, and she could swear that she saw you struggling with your own thoughts, you were not a threat and she could feel that even though you had dark magic you wouldn’t be able to put someone in danger, you looked so broken but you hide it behind that cold mask, Agatha had seen all of this by just looking at your sad eyes.
The feeling didn’t last longer, you quickly composed yourself and took another sip of your lemonade.
“My name´s y/n, and it is not my fault that I possess this dark magic, it was my mother´s fault, she was pregnant when she started to play with dark magic, and I´m not sure how but my mother told me that when I was born, dark magic was already running through my veins”
You told her trying to act as if that hadn’t doomed you to be alone for the rest of your life.
Agatha was surprised, she had never heard of someone who had been born out of dark magic, this was strange, how could you have dark magic within you but at the same time you were not interested in your powers, you seemed as if you despise them.
“Have you used them to obtain something? Dark magic can be very powerful dear” The pet names she was calling you were too much for you to handle, no one had ever called you like that, and you were dangerously liking the way she was talking to you.
Should you tell her that you didn’t know how to use your powers? No one taught you how to use them, all the witches were afraid of you.
“I´m not interested in my powers” You told her looking right into her eyes in order to make her believe that you were telling the truth.
Agatha of course didn’t believe you; you had a great power within you, how could you not be interested in it? This was unbelievable, but she realized that you were not going to tell her the truth, so she had to try something else, Agatha sighed again and she placed her hand under her chin, examining you.
“Alright, then how did you arrive here? Did you feel Wanda´s power too?” You just blinked, so you were right she didn’t live here, she arrived after Wanda came here, you couldn’t help but feel disappointed.
This look didn’t go unnoticed by Agatha and just kept staring at you.
“I already lived here; Eastview has always been a peaceful place to live” You simply answered not wanting to keep talking, you stood from the couch and Agatha was confused, then how a powerful witch like you had ended up here?
“I think I should leave; the talent show will be ready in a few hours and I think this woman Wanda wants all of us to be there”
Agatha quickly stood and placed herself in front of you touching slightly your arms and you tensed.
“Hey you know, maybe I could help you with your magic, I know a lot about dark magic, we can work together, I can help you to develop more your powers, I can be your mentor” Agatha said with a genuine smile, that was what you had wanted the most years ago, if only someone had offered you help, you hesitated for a moment, you really wanted her help but what if in the end she just leaves like everyone did?
Agatha sensed your hesitation, now she really wanted to help you but she couldn’t understand why you couldn’t accept, what was stopping you?
“Thank you but no, I´m really good on my own, I really don´t need the help of anyone” Once again you were hiding behind that cold mask.
Agatha wanted to insist but she didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable so she decided to give you time to think.
“Alright, then I will see you at the talent show angel”
“See you there Agatha” Agatha gave you a half smile why wouldn’t you let her help you, with a confused look on her face she went to the door to open it for you, you thanked her and stepped out of her house, however Agatha couldn’t stop thinking about you, the way you looked so sad but at the same time so strong, what had happened to you? She had been interested in Wanda´s magic but now you just had drawn her attention, she wanted to get to know you better.
Some hours later you decided to go the talent show, you had never attended to one and even though you had seen real magic in action you were excited for this, it was something new.
Arriving at the place you saw some of the women who had attended to the club already sitting in the chairs, seeing some chairs in front a table that were not taken you sat down there waiting for everything to start.
Putting your elbows on the table you placed you chin on your hands, and minutes later you heard someone sitting next to you, turning your head a little you saw it was Agatha, she smiled gently at you and you waved your hand a little.
“Are you ready to see some dumb fake tricks darling?” She asked winking at you, you just nodded for what it felt like the tenth time in the day.
You noticed Agatha kept looking at you, her glance was so intense that you were afraid she would burn a hole in your face.
By the time the show started you saw Wanda on stage accompanied by a tall man, you didn’t know who it was.
“That’s Wanda’s husband, Vision, dear” Agatha whispered in your ear and your body shivered, this time you couldn’t hide your reaction and Agatha noticed it.
“This is boring, wanna see some real action there darling?” You couldn’t answer because you saw Agatha moving her hands and smoke purple emanated from her hands and quickly you saw what she had caused on stage, you really couldn’t help but laugh, this was really funny and even if you wanted not to laugh you couldn’t help it.
Agatha found it so cute the fact that you were trying to cover your laugh with your hand, she saw the movement on your shoulders and she smiled, she thought your laugh was so sweet and she wanted to make you laugh more.
You couldn’t ignore Agatha; she was a really funny person.
When the tricks and Vision’s act ended you heard him saying he needed a volunteer and Agatha was faster than anyone to make a comment
“Are you sure you don’t want an audience volunteer named "my husband Ralph?” That cracked you up, and this time you laughed, hard, she was hilarious and the other people who heard her laughed as well.
Agatha heard the sound of your laugh and her heart melted at the sound, she looked at you and saw the way your eyes squinted when you were laughing, she had never seen someone so beautiful but with a lot of sadness at the same time, she wanted to do something, she wanted to see you happy and even though she had met you some hours ago, she felt something warm growing inside her chest.
“Darling, you have a beautiful laugh” When you heard that you instantly froze and stopped laughing, your face became serious again and you cleared your throat.
You just turned your head a little you look at her to give her a shy smile
Agatha smiled back at you with a sad smile, you were so beautiful why were you trying so hard to hide yourself? Why didn’t you want to be seen?
When the talent show ended and everyone else clapped you decided it was time to leave, standing up from the chair Agatha stood up as well
“Hey darling do you want me to accompany you to your house?” She asked while trying to grab gently your arm, but you stepped back a little
“No, it’s alright, I can walk alone, have a goodnight Agatha” You said in a rushed you didn’t want to spend a lot of time with her, you couldn’t let yourself get attached to her, if she decided to leave she wouldn’t even think about you, so it was better to evade any other type of interaction, she was just here because of her interest in Wanda���s magic, and she could leave any time, you were not about to fall for a woman you had just met.
Walking alone through the street you arrived at your house, once again the loneliness and sadness took over you, talking to Agatha felt so risky, you didn’t want to end up with your heart broken, she was just so sweet and you couldn’t stop thinking about her.
Agatha wanted to be close to you she wanted to help you with your powers, but you just pushed her away, she felt disappointed because she really wanted to help you one way or another.
Later that night you noticed Westview changing again, and once again the furniture and the decorations changed too, it was a nice change and you notice right away the era had changed you were pretty sure now it was the 70´s, you had already passed through that time years ago.
Days kept passing and Agatha tried to talk to you, she would always come to your house just to ask if you were doing fine, you weren’t sure how she had discovered where you lived but maybe she had just asked Wanda where was your house, of course Wanda knew where everyone was.
During her quick visits, sometimes she would give you little gifts, one day she gave you flowers, you still blushed at the memory, that day you couldn’t stop thinking about her, she looked so pretty with her straight hair you had seen her passed by your street riding her bike, you had been looking through the window thinking about how things were going on Westview and what had caught your attention had been the sound of the bell in her bike, when you saw her you smiled, whenever she was near you felt happiness but that was something you wouldn’t let her know.
After the first time she passed riding her bike in front of your house, then minutes later she passed through again and you laughed, you were sure she knew you were in the window, 10 minutes later again she passed again and this time she waved her hand at you just to disappear again on the other side of the street, you waited another 10 minutes because you thought she would pass again but this time she didn’t and you felt disappointed so you walked to your couch to take a nap or at least to try, but when you had placed yourself in the couch someone knocked on you door, you went to answer the door and this time you couldn’t hide your smile, Agatha was standing in your door with a bunch of flowers in her hands, you looked at them and they were so pretty.
“Hello angel, I was on my way to my house and I decided to bring you these, I hope you like them dear” Agatha handed the flowers to you and you took them, Agatha saw you biting your lower lip and she smiled too, little by little she was starting to see a change, she just wanted to make you smile and wanted to be near you, and this was what she started to do.
“Thank you seriously, you didn’t have to but I´m glad you brought this to me, they are really beautiful” You said while smiling, a genuine smile, for the first time you didn’t feel like hiding and Agatha was glad that she could finally see you smile.
“ I wanted to baby girl, now I have to go back to my house to make sure everything’s in order, see you later sweetheart” Your heart melted, you really liked when she called you like that.
You laughed at the memory of that time when you had gone into town to buy some things you needed, and how weirdly it had been that Agatha had bump into you, you couldn’t help the smirk in your face that day.
“Hey sweetheart isn´t amazing that we just met again? I didn’t know you were coming to the- uh, to the grocery store, I came here for some things as well, you know things to prepare dinner”
That day you walked side by side with her, you felt really comfortable around her and that day you realized how much you had fallen for her, how couldn’t you? She was so sweet, she treated you right and she was always making you laugh and just with her presence you didn’t feel the need to hide again, you really wanted to express to her how much you loved her, how much she had captivated you.
After that day full of quick glances towards each other, shy smiles and gentle brushes against each other you realized you loved her, a lot.
Agatha brushed her hand against your hand and even you could feel her fingers touching yours, it was such an innocent move that left you yearning for more and what made you feel happier was the fact that Agatha didn’t even buy a single thing, she just helped you put things into the shopping cart at the same time she said funny things that cracked you up, she had completely forgot to actually buy things, she had done it on purpose, the fact that she had bumped into you that day on purpose made you feel happy, she just had wanted to spend some time with you, and for the first time in your life you felt loved.
But the feeling didn’t last longer, when you said your goodbyes and you came back home, all the memories of the people you had loved, your mother, your sisters of the coven, your witch-friends, they all had abandoned you, they had forgotten about you, no one ever helped you, you had to learn to stand up for yourself because no one would have ever done it for you, you learned how to stay away from everyone because deep down you knew everyone would leave you.
You really wanted to be close to Agatha, you wanted to hug her and to kiss her, but what if she in the end just leaves you like the others? You wouldn’t be able to bare another heart break, you couldn’t and you wouldn’t, but the feeling of loneliness for centuries that had never gone away, it felt like it was coming back everything at the same time, you couldn’t bare it anymore, you wanted to be loved but at the same time you were just so afraid of the many what ifs.
It had been three days since Agatha and you had gone shopping together and since that day you didn’t dare to leave you room, you couldn’t control the way you were feeling you just wanted to cry, you wanted to yell to break things, finally someone showed interest in you and you kept pushing her away, you couldn’t help it the constant fear of being thrown away didn’t leave your mind, you were not happy being alone but it was the only thing you could do in order to protect yourself, you kept saying to yourself how good you were just in your own, but deep down you knew you craved for a hug or just a simple touch of hands, you wanted to hold Agatha´s hand you wanted to tell her everything but the fear you felt didn’t let you.
Agatha was worried about you; had she crossed the limits? She couldn’t guess but she was worried, you hadn’t left your house in three days in a row, and you usually went for a quick walk, it was not that she had been spying on you, well, maybe just a little, but she wanted to know if you were ok, she worried about you a lot, and she had fallen for you, she knew you were just broken and she wanted to help you fix the broken parts of your heart, she was just waiting to be sure that you were not afraid anymore, and she had thought that the shopping day had been the right path, Agatha thought that you were finally opening yourself a little, but now after three days of not knowing anything from you she couldn’t help but to be worried sick.
So of course she became worried sick when she hadn’t heard anything from you, the first day after the shopping, she waited for you at the sidewalk, she knew on Mondays you always went for a quick walk, but after 30 minutes of waiting she realized you were not coming, it was strange, maybe you were running late but after waiting 15 minutes more she decided to go home, she would look for you later.
Agatha started to walk towards her house when she saw Dottie walking to the direction, she was coming from
“Hey Agnes, when you see your girlfriend can you say hi to her for me? I really like her but now that she’s so smitten by you, the only person she talks to is you, Agnes I must say I’m kind of jealous, you’re a lucky woman Agnes, please say hi to her for me”
Agnes was dumbfounded, she was not expecting Dottie to say that to her, but at least she was happy that someone had said to her that she could draw your attention, with that she kept walking to her house with a big smile on her face, she couldn’t wait to tell you how she felt about you.
The second day she went to look at your house again, but the feeling that something was wrong took over her, she knocked on the door and you didn’t answer that was something strange, whenever she visited you, you didn’t make her wait too much, she stayed there for over twenty minutes more and even though she wanted to enter to make sure you were alright she didn’t dare to do it, what if you were mad at her? Or what if you thought she had crossed the limits? Frowning she decided it was better to leave, maybe think about what could had gone wrong between the two of you.
She wanted to see you so bad but now you were nowhere to be seen, no one had seen you left your house, of course Agatha asked the neighbors but they told her the same, that you hadn’t gone left your house.
The third day she felt something different in the air, she could sense something was wrong and of course she could sense your magic in it, she had to go look for you, there was something wrong she was right, leaving her house in a rush she almost ran to your house, this time she didn’t knock on you door, Agatha simply used her magic to open it and when she entered a hit of dark magic almost made her step back, it was strong, your magic was really strong.
Looking around your living room she didn’t see you in there and all the lights were off, the room was eerily silent, and for the first time in her long life, she was scared, scared that something had happen to you, quickly she went upstairs and in the middle of the stairs she notice something there.
Scrunching down a little she saw some type of vines, they were completely black, she followed the vine and they ended in a room and she supposed it was your room.
She took a deep breath preparing herself to enter, she reached for the doorknob and frowned a little, Agatha opened the door in a hasty movement, she had been preparing herself to fight whoever may be hurting you, but she had not prepared herself to see what was in front of her.
Inside the room there were many vines around your body, you couldn’t move and you had tears streaming down your cheeks, she gasped, you were trapped under your own magic, you were lying in the bed but the black vines were all over your body and some of them were even hanging on the walls and the ceiling, she wanted to cry, she couldn’t believe you were doing this to yourself, taking her hand to cover her mouth and walked towards you.
Agatha crouched down on the floor near your bed and she placed her hand on your forehead.
When she touched you she could feel all the sadness and sorrow you felt, all the pain that you had been hidden through all the years, all the loneliness and fear you were feeling all the time, it was too much pain and her heart clenched, you had passed through horrible things alone, now she understood why you were so afraid, you had been abandoned by everyone in your life, she wanted to help you, she would never leave you, she would never leave you alone.
Agatha used her magic on you, purple smoke covered your head, and she could see that it was working, slowly all the black vines started to disappear and the ones that you were trapped in disappeared after some minutes of her using her magic on you.
When you opened your eyes again you saw Agatha staring at you with a concerned look on her face, you felt the soft touch of her fingers in your temple, you were shocked, you had been trapped on your own memories that you didn’t notice your magic had reacted at your feelings, the vines were protecting you from the outside.
Blinking a few times, you stood from the bed to throw yourself at Agatha, you hugged her putting your arms around her neck, Agatha caught you and she placed her arms around your waist, now the two of you were on the floor, hugging each other.
You were sobbing you couldn’t contain the tears that kept coming from your eyes, you were in pain form all the things that happened to you, but at the same time you felt happy, Agatha had saved you from yourself, she cared for you and what she had done meant the world to you, while you were trapped in your memories, you could feel Agatha´s magic, helping you, her magic was calling you to wake up, and what you felt was love.
Agatha soothed you while you cried, she gently stroked your hair and she placed a kiss on your forehead, you were hiding your face in her chest and for the first time in many centuries you finally felt the warm feeling of a hug.
When you calmed yourself a little you separated yourself from Agatha to look at her eyes, oh how beautiful her blue eyes were, without thinking twice you leant and kissed her, she captured your lips on her own, and she kissed you back, it was a soft kiss, she wanted you to feel all the love she felt for you, Agatha pulled you closer to her, she wanted to feel you, she wouldn’t never leave you.
Breaking the kiss to look straight into her eyes, you smiled you wanted to say many things to her but you were lost for words, you opened your mouth but closed it again, you didn’t know how to start and before you could say something to her, Agatha lifted your chin and gave you a soft peck on your lips again.
“Oh angel, I just felt what you feel all the time and I caught glimpses of your memory, I know what you had been through and I´m really sorry that they were afraid of you, but please let me help you, if you let me, I will make sure to always be by your side, guide you and teach you about your magic, like anyone else have done it before, let me hold you and care for you, I promise to never leave you, please let me be in your life doll” You wanted to cry again, but this time out of happiness, everything she had told you was real, you could feel it, she was offering you what you had craved for a long time, you have never felt as happy as how you were feeling, Agatha could be your home, something you had been looking for a long time, and now this was your real chance, you could have it all with Agatha.
“I want to be with you, I have fallen for you quite deep, and what I feel for you is pure, I tried to push you away because I was scared but this time, I won´t make the same mistake” You rested your head on her chest again hearing the thumping of her heart, Agatha was amazed by you, she was mesmerized, she had never felt the urge to be with someone and now she just wanted you to be with her and she wanted to hold you so much, she would never hurt you and she would make sure that you always feel loved, kissing your forehead again she stroked you back with her hand.
“I know honey, and now you won´t need to push me away anymore, I will be with you and no matter what I will always be there for you, I want to make you happy and I will make sure to always show you how much I love you, you don´t have to hide anymore”
You felt safe in her arms and you knew this was the start of something beautiful, now you didn’t feel scared, for once in your life you felt brave enough to let someone love you and you were going to love her just as deeply as you knew she loved you.
You lifted your head an Agatha saw you had a beautiful and real smile on your face, she liked seeing the real you, now you wouldn’t need to hide your feelings, not anymore, you knew your feelings and you were safe with her, and she would never do something to hurt you, how lucky you really were, she couldn’t take all the memories again, but you were sure with time all these memories wouldn’t hurt as much, and with her help one day all the memories wouldn’t hurt and affect you anymore, finally you had found your home and your place in the world, and that place was with Agatha, finally you felt at peace, you were sure Agatha will make you fix the broken pieces of your heart, Agatha would never leave you, you wouldn’t have to be alone again.
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nicka-nell ¡ 4 months ago
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omg ur taking requests!
can you do some angst to fluff with Atsumu, Iwaizumi, Suna, Kuroo, Ushijima, and Sakusa (I’m sorry if they’re too many you can choose whoever you want to write about from these characters, I luv all of them soooo much)
Can you make it like really really Angsty in the start. Like the characters doing something they’ll regret a lot and then they spend a lot of efforts making up for it? Please make it fluffy in the end, I can’t handle sad endings 😭
Also please don’t include anything with infidelity or mentions of it. My boyfriend of 3 years cheated on me last month and I’m having such a hard time.
Thank you for considering my request. And there’s no pressure to accept, I don’t mind at all.
Hi! yes I am taking requests right now. 😇 First of all, I'm so sorry that you had such a negative experience. But tbh, you're better off this way. Nobody needs such an ass cheating on them! 😔😤 My ex did that too, with my ex-best friend btw. I also had a hard time but quickly felt better because I realised that it's a waste of time to cry over such a dick. I hope you don't lose hope in a healthy relationship based on trust. There really are good people out there and I hope you find someone who can appreciate you. Sending you a lot of hugs and kisses. 🤗💚❤️‍🩹
And for your request. I've written three stories for Tsumu, Iwa and Suna. Unfortunately they got a bit tooo long for my taste, so I only made these 3. I hope that's okay. I really had problems making it super angsty (urg, I need more practice for angsty stuff 😵‍💫). As you wished, I didn't include anything with cheating (even though I had a few ideas haha.) and I also added a trigger warning before each story. I think Iwa's and Suna's in particular might be a bit darker... so you can decide on your own if you want to continue reading it or not. Anyway, I hope you still like it, and thanks for your request. Stay healthy! 🥰💚
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Regretting their actions
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Pairing: Atsumu x, Iwaizumi x, Suna x reader
Warning: angst to fluff, break-up (Atsumu, Suna), mention of abuse/anger issues, mention of blood (Iwaizumi), mention of abortion, mention of drugs/pills (Suna)
Part 1 | Part 2 (End)
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tw: mention of break-up
You met Atsumu when he came to his brother’s onigiri store for the housewarming.
The two of you got along well quickly. And it wasn’t long before he kissed you at a party, looked at you with his cheeky grin and said, “Tastes better than a victory.”
More things happened that night. Not just simple kisses and when you woke up next to him in bed, he asked you, still sleepy: “You’re my girlfriend now, aren’t you?”
You’ve been together for several years now and were thinking about moving in together soon when Atsumu’s career suddenly took off. He was traveling abroad more often and had less time for you or looking for an apartment.
And then it happened…
You scroll through the apartment search app for something suitable for the two of you, lying on the bed while missing him terribly. You close the app to go to your messenger, only to realize that you were the one who last texted Atsumu... two days ago… Two blue check marks indicate that he has read your messages but has not replied. Your fingers hover over the keypad of your phone and you think about writing to him. Maybe he read your message during training and didn’t have time to reply. Maybe he just forgot about it afterwards... maybe...
“Hey Tsumu... I know you’re busy but, I hope you’re doing well. Love you.” you type into your phone and send the message with a strange feeling in your stomach. It doesn’t take long before you see under his name that he is online. The gray check marks next to your message turn blue, but instead of replying, you see that he went offline again. You swallow a big lump down your throat, your heart feels heavy. Maybe he can’t answer you right now... you try to convince yourself again.
Several hours pass as you sink your head into your pillow and try to stifle your tears. Atsumu’s sports t-shirt is in your arms, which he had given you before his trip abroad. Time passes and suddenly you hear the ringtone of your phone as a message arrives. Your heart hits loud against your chest as you reach for your phone and see your boyfriend’s name. But your joy quickly disappears, the lump in your throat gets bigger and you can’t breathe. 
>> Hey... listen, I think it’s better if we end the relationship… break up. I don’t know, but I just don’t have time for it. I’ll see you around. <<
It feels like a slap in the face. As if this is a poor joke. You want to write to him, ask him what this is all about, but your tears blur your vision. The only thing you send is a “really?” but the message is no longer read. It remains on one gray check mark.
Two days go by and you still think it was all a bad joke, but every time you read his message, you feel like throwing up. Has he really dumped the whole relationship? By a shitty text message? You open your Instagram account and enter his name almost as if on autopilot.
Another slap in the face as your tears run down your cheeks again. His bio no longer says “Best setter and proud boyfriend” but simply “Setter MSBY Black Jackal”. All the pictures he had with you on his account have been deleted. Instead, you can only see advertising photos or private photos of him. The last eight pictures are of him, Hinata and Bokuto dancing and having fun with fans in different bars. Atsumu grins at the camera as if he doesn’t care about you at all. As if your relationship meant nothing to him.
You text him some more times, leave him voicemails because he never answers your calls. But after a few days, you let it go. It only frustrates you even more to see how little this relationship actually meant to him. For days, you cry yourself to sleep, what doesn’t go unnoticed by Osamu. After all, he sees you three times a week when you help him out in his store. When you tell him what has happened, he is also speechless, because Atsumu has really pissed him off with all his raving about you. So why would he break-up with you out of the blue? Osamu can’t see you as devastated as a heap of misery. So he also tries to find out the reason for the break-up between you and his silly brother. But when he calls him, Atsumu only faces him coldly on the phone. “Did she tell you to ask me? Leave it okay? I think I just realized that I don’t want a relationship.”
Two months go by and somehow you still can’t believe that your relationship just fell apart. Osamu tries to distract you somehow, but it doesn’t help because he reminds you too much of your idiot ex-boyfriend.
Nevertheless, you are grateful to Osamu for swapping your shift with his coworker’s shift so that you can open the store with him in the morning. That way, you avoid running into Atsumu, who is more likely to be in the restaurant in the evening as soon as he returns from his stay abroad. You’re not ready to face him at the moment.
Just as you’re about to finish work, you remember that you wanted to show Osamu a video on your phone. “Look, the new trailer for the second season of this soccer series is out. Shall we watch the first episode together on Saturday after work?” you ask Osamu as he approaches you and looks over your shoulder. He rests his hand on the counter next to you, his chest almost touching your back, but he keeps his distance from you respectfully. You are both focused on the trailer, not hearing the doorbell from the store.
Atsumu is tired. The flight was delayed, and he hasn’t been able to sleep properly for weeks. How could he sleep well with all the partying and Hinata as his roommate, who spent the night in the hotel calling his friends from Karasuno. At least that’s what he tells himself… that this is the reason for his sleepless nights. But this thought vanishes when he steps into his brother’s store hungry, actually only wanting to eat a few onigiris and then go home. Into his apartment. His empty, dreary apartment. But as he walks through the door of the store, it feels as if someone has hit his chest with full force, knocking the air out of him.
He sees Osamu leaning towards you with a sense of familiarity. What’s going on there? And why does it bother him so much that you giggle and look at Osamu, who returns your gaze with a nod and a smile before turning to the door? His brother winces when he sees Atsumu. As you turn around as well, your smile disappears.
You look at Atsumu as if you’ve just seen a corpse, before packing your bag and saying goodbye to Osamu with a “See you tomorrow.”, only to walk past Atsumu with quick steps. You don’t even give him a glance, knowing that if you locked eyes with him, your tears would run. You would want to ask him questions upon questions. Why did you break up with me? Why am I not enough for you? Why did you lie to me for so long? Why...
As you walk through the door, you accidentally bump into him. This nudge, which was actually rather gentle, felt so painful. Why does it bother Atsumu to see you standing so close to his brother? Why does it hurt him that you stared at him with those empty eyes, as if he were a stranger? No. Worse, as if he were someone who had hurt you. Why does he have the feeling that he couldn’t make a sound if he opened his mouth now? The answer is simple, and even Atsumu seems to understand it by now as he looks from the now closed door over to Osamu, who stares at him with an indifferent expression crossing his arms in front of his chest. “So this is what someone who has realized that he doesn’t want a relationship looks like? Ya look like shit.”
Oh, how Atsumu would love to punch Osamu in the face. “Why are ya touchin’ my girl?” is bitter on his tongue, but he has no right to say it out loud. After all, he was the one who turned you down. The blonde Miya suddenly realizes how incredibly stupid his action was.
Back then, Atsumu had not expected to be traveling abroad so often. At first, it was only temporary stays. Nothing that would damage a relationship.
But the last few times in particular, he was sometimes away for several months. You kept telling him on the phone that everything was okay, but every time he called Osamu, he said that your eyes were sometimes red when you came to work and that you looked tired and sad.
Atsumu knew he was the reason. That you’d probably be better off without him. After all, you’re a great woman, someone who would find a new partner quickly.
You didn’t deserve to be sad all the time when he was gone. You should be happy. After all, a smile suits you so much better than a sad expression.
Atsumu would concentrate on his career. It would be difficult for him at first, but he would manage without you. He had to… for your sake.
So his mind was made up when he read your unanswered, concerned messages. If he texts you now to say that it’s over, being an ass to you, you’ll be able to forget him quickly… That was what he thought. 
But it wasn’t that easy. Your puzzled messages, your crying voice on his voicemail, broke his heart. Yet he tried to cover it all up with parties and his dear fans. He convinced himself that he was fine. Only to arrive home, see you and realize what an idiot he was, how much he missed you.
And now it’s Atsumu who reaches for his phone and texts you message after message.
Atsumu 8:02 PM: Hey babe, no.. hey Y/n. I know I have no right to text you. But please… let’s talk. I fucked up. Damn, I fucked up so hard that I don’t even know how to start… shit…
Atsumu 8:12 PM: Please… please answer your phone, babe…
Atsumu 8:44 PM: I know I’ve fucked up. I know I hurt and disappointed you. Fuck, I know I was an ass. Yk, I thought I was doing the right thing. 
Atsumu 9:34 PM: Fuck… please answer me… I still… damnit. 
That was the last message you received from Atsumu before you put your phone away and tried to forget him. Why is he doing this to you? Why is he stirring up your feelings again?
But Atsumu doesn’t think about stopping now. He runs to your house, to the apartment building and rings your doorbell. Once, twice, he rings so often that you can’t ignore it. You are about to tell him to leave through the loudspeaker system, but he interrupts you.
“Fuck baby, please open the door. I’m… I still love ya, okay? I always loved ya. I - shit, can ya even hear me? Fuck…” he curses agitatedly and presses the bell next to your nameplate again several times.
But instead of letting him in, you go down to the entrance of the apartment building and open the door with an expression on your face that Atsumu has never seen before. What is it? Anger, sadness, despair? Everything somehow.
“Say... are you kidding me? Do you think that’s funny?” you ask him, bewildered, still standing in the open doorway. Of course, you wouldn’t just believe him. Atsumu could have guessed. Your reaction was completely understandable. But he has to do something to show you that he’s serious.
“No, no, I don’t. I’m dead serious. Please let me explain,” he says, and starts to tell you that he thought a break-up would be best for you because he’s not good enough for you. Since you were obviously so sad about him leaving so often and he didn’t want to be the reason. He tells you that he thought he could get over you, but that he had to realize that you are the most important thing to him. Something… someone he doesn’t want to lose. With shaky hands and a still agitated voice, Atsumu takes out his phone.
“I wanted ya to hate me so that it would be easier for ya. But believe me, I... I couldn’t forget ya. Look, you’re still my wallpaper. All the photos of the two of us are still on my phone, all the memories-“ he is about to unlock his screen when his phone falls out of his hand and drops to the floor. Atsumu seems to be completely overwhelmed right now, as if he doesn’t know what to do. Should he bend down, pick up the phone, should he keep talking to you or hug you? He doesn’t know.
”Baby, please, please, I’ll do anything. Please gimme a chance. I’ll talk to my agent about not takin’ so many jobs abroad. I will be with ya more often. Always write to ya and call ya in the evening when I’m not at home. Let’s look for an apartment so we can move in together. Please, please, I would do anything. Please believe me that I love ya. Please..." he begs in a voice that becomes more and more brittle with every word. His eyes are full of emotion and his hands, which have unconsciously reached for yours, are trembling terribly.
“Two months... two months you ignored me, treated me like a piece of trash.” You say in a low voice as you search for eye contact. Atsumu has never felt so scared. Only now does he realize that the love of his life is standing in front of him, and that this might be the last time he’ll see her again, the last time he’ll touch her skin. But then again… Atsumu was an ass, so why should you forgive him? No, he can’t think like that. After all, you loved him. And if you love him as much as he loves you, then maybe there’s still hope.
“I know, and I know I can never make it up to ya. I know it’s not done with an ‘I’m sorry’. I’m the dumbest, most idiotic ex-boyfriend you’ve ever had. But... I’m stubborn too. And if that means chasin’ after ya for 10 years, drivin’ to yer apartment every day to ring the doorbell and tell ya I still love ya, wishin’ ya a good night every day, nice dreams and telling ya how important you are to me... I’ll do it. Every damn day, if it means there’s still a little hope for us.” He answers you hoarsely, keeping eye contact, hoping that you see how honest his words are.
You sigh, bend down, and pick up his phone before handing it to him. Atsumu doesn’t know what to do with all this. His face grimaces as if he’s expecting the worst. “Then... you shouldn’t lose your phone... if you want to write to me every day,” you answer him, a weak smile on your lips. Atsumu’s sorrowful expression suddenly changes and you see him looking at you with hope.
“Does that mean ya...” the blonde Miya can no longer contain his emotions as he leaps forward and pulls you into his arms. His embrace is so tight that you can barely breathe, as if he’s afraid you’ll slip out of his hands. Firm, but quivering. His whole body is shaking and you’re sure you’ve just felt something wet on your skin. Tears? Is Atsumu crying? “I promise to be a pain in yer ass every day. To text ya, to call ya, to be there for ya. Even in yer sleep. Okay? I love ya... I love ya so much...”
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tw: abuse, anger issues, mention of blood
You’ve been with Iwaizumi since your school days. Back then, as a little flirt at school, Oikawa and Matsukawa mainly teased Iwaizumi for having a crush on you.
But in the end, many were jealous of the perfect couple who waltzed together on the dance floor at the prom with loving looks on their faces.
You were inseparable. Even Iwaizumi’s stay in America for his university didn’t affect your relationship. So it was no wonder that you got married after his return and were the perfect happy couple.
At least for the first few years.
The stress of being a coach for the Japanese national team is weighing on Iwaizumi’s mind. He normally handles stressful situations well, but he is under pressure.
If the team fails to perform in the next few games, he will lose many sponsors and possibly even his job.
Iwaizumi is constantly on edge and you feel like you have to walk on eggshells around him so you don’t provoke him.
More often, he has sudden temper tantrums, shouting at you about things that aren’t worth mentioning. “Damn it, I told you I need this one shirt for today. Why isn’t it clean?”
And once, when you stumbled with your words and asked him whether it might not be better to take a break as a coach, he was so angry that he almost hit you. But he managed to hold back and just sighed before going out for a beer in a nearby bar.
You don’t want to admit it to yourself, but right now, you’re really scared of your own husband.
Today was another training match between the Japanese national team and the Indonesian team. The team’s performance was better, but nowhere near good enough to shine. You watched the game on TV and run through your imaginary list in your head already, of potential trigger points for Iwaizumi. You don’t want him to get upset. The laundry is done; the house is clean; the food is also ready and in the fridge. Did you take out the trash? You chew nervously on your lower lip as you walk to the kitchen and let out a relieved sigh. That’s done too.
You are just closing the lid of the garbage can when you hear the key in the lock of your front door and Iwaizumi comes home with a surprisingly normal, “I’m home, my love, smells good in here”. Your shoulders relax immediately, a smile is back on your lips as you walk cheerfully into the hallway to greet Iwaizumi.
“Hello darling! How was your day?” Iwaizumi hugs you and leans down so you can kiss his cheek. “Let me eat something first. My day has been really exhausting,” he sighs, watching you nod and turn around to warm up the food for him. Your husband hangs up his jacket, puts down his bag and is about to turn around to follow you when he stumbles against a nearby vase that you had placed as a decoration for the fall changeover. The vase swings, loses its balance and falls to the floor in pieces.
“Shit!” You hear Iwaizumi curse and immediately run to him, anxiously hoping that nothing has happened to him. But luckily, he is unharmed. “Wait, I’ll clean up the broken pieces, you eat-“ you’re about to say, but Iwaizumi interrupts you loudly. “Always this stupid bullshit you put up. Shit, I could have hurt myself. If I miss now, that’s it for my career!” he shouts and stomps past you. You turn around hastily and apologize. “That wasn’t my intention, really,” you say, before realizing that it was a mistake to talk back. Iwaizumi turns around, his eyes ferocious and angry like a wild animal as he takes a step towards you. Your heart is beating restlessly and you are suddenly afraid.
“Not your intention? Admit it, you’d be happy if I got rid of the job!” he shouts, noticing how you start to tremble and shake your head. But Iwaizumi doesn’t seem to be in his right mind as he takes another step towards you. “Go clean up the mess! Make yourself useful!” he says through gritted teeth as he looks at your anxious and puzzled face. You know you should move, but your body doesn’t seem to listen, too scared to move a finger. And then it happens.
Iwaizumi grabs you by the hair and pulls you towards him. You cry out, weeping bitterly as you hear his voice again. “Are you deaf?! Get going!” he shouts, before pushing you away with more force than necessary. You lose your balance, stumble over your own feet as you fall and hit your head on the edge of the stairs in the hallway next to the broken vase. Your head hurts terribly, something warm flows down your face, sticking to your hair and making your vision suddenly completely different. It gets smaller and smaller before everything goes black in front of your eyes and the sounds around you stop completely.
Iwaizumi is abruptly perfectly sober and only now understands what has just happened. What he has just done to you, the woman he loves more than anything.
His eyes are big as he stares at his hands, which start to tremble in front of him.
Panic spreads through him as he looks at you. At your motionless body, at all the blood under your head.
He doesn’t know how he did it. His memories are hazy, but he can still remember trying to wake you up, in vain.
He had taken off his shirt, pressed it on your head injury to stop the bleeding and somehow managed to call an ambulance. Iwaizumi can’t remember anything else, just the one question from the paramedic who put you on the ambulance stretcher and took you to the hospital. Since Iwaizumi was your husband, he was allowed to drive with you.
“How did this happen?” the paramedic asked, as Iwaizumi answered quietly, “I don’t know... I really don’t know.”
It’s now been some hours after the accident and your head had been stitched up. Thank God it wasn’t as bad as it looked at first.
You’re still in the recovery room, Iwaizumi next to your bed on a chair, his hands folded in his lap as he hangs his head in bewilderment, looking at his wedding ring shining on his ring finger.
What happened? What has become of him? He still can’t believe what he has done.
He looks at his hands again, opens them, starts to tremble, clenches them into fists and realises how he lets out a frustrated sigh, which he had been holding back, as warm tears roll down his cheeks, soaking the fabric of his trousers.
In his mind, there’s only your shaking body, that frightened look, your screaming, and then this unbearable silence.
When you open your eyes, your head throbs a little and you have to squint through the bright, clinical light. “Where... where am I?” you say quietly, looking around the room and noticing that you’re lying in a hospital room. Next to your bed is none other than Iwaizumi. But he looks different. Broken… He shrinks at your words and looks up at you. You see his red eyes and how he hesitates whether it’s okay to take your hand in his. Iwaizumi gets up from his chair, wants to close the distance to your bed but his legs collapse and he falls to his knees when he suddenly starts to... cry? 
“Haji- me...” you say, still feeling exhausted. “I’m... god I...” Iwaizumi doesn’t know what to say, doesn’t know how to look you in the eye. He takes a deep breath, regains his courage before peering at you. Carefully, he grasps your hand, checking if you are afraid, but you don’t seem to pull it away. Maybe because you’re still too tired. Awkwardly, he strokes the back of your hand before resting his forehead on it and closing his eyes briefly.
“I’m a terrible husband. I’ve done everything I shouldn’t have done. Instead of carrying you on my hands, bringing a smile to your face and protecting you from everything that would harm you, I’ve done the exact opposite. Instead of being happy to see me, you’re just scared of me, aren’t you?” he says in a shaky voice and looks up at you again. You are calm. Just stare at him with a hurt look.
“I.... I can understand if you want a divorce. If you don’t want to be with a monster like me anymore. I really can’t even blame you. But... please let me tell you one thing. When I saw you lying on the floor like that, the world collapsed inside me. I was afraid of losing the most important thing in my life. And the most important thing is not my job, no, it’s you. And I’m ashamed that I’ve forgotten that. I am disgusted with myself and I know that is no excuse. What I have done is unforgivable. But please... if there is still a bit of hope, then I will try to do everything I can to be the man you fell in love with again. I want to be your Haji-bear again. Your place of peace, and your favorite person. I will go to anger issues therapy, behavioral therapy. If it’s better for our relationship, I’ll step down as a coach and see if I can find a job as a volleyball coach at a school. No matter what, I would do anything.” Your hand becomes wet as his tears land on it. His words move something inside you. You want to believe him, you don’t want the relationship to end either, but everything that has happened so far will not pass by without damage.
“I need time, Hajime... If you really mean it, please grant me the time...” you answer him and notice how your words seem to tear him apart. But at the same time he seems to want to make the best of the situation. He lets go of your hand and stands up just to sit back down on the chair next to your bed, looking at you determinedly, his eyes still red and swollen. “As much time as you need. If it means we still have a chance...”
A few months pass. Iwaizumi has passed on the house to you and moved into his parents’ house to give you the space you need. He goes to therapy three times a week and tells you about his progress. He is still coaching the national team, but his assistant coach is taking a lot of the work off his hands and the volleyball team seems to be playing better again.
Just like when you were at school, you’ll find a letter in your letterbox once a week. Back then, Iwaizumi always told you a bit about his week and wrote it down because, funnily enough, he was too shy to talk to you in person. Only that in his current letters he writes that he misses you, but hopes that you are doing well at the moment.
He meets you in public places, goes out with you, so that you gradually feel more comfortable with him again, that you can see his progress in therapy and don’t just think it’s empty words.
Six months have passed since the incident. You are standing in the bedroom, changing the sheets, when Iwaizumi comes through the front door of the house. “My love, I’m home,” you hear Iwaizumi’s calm voice. Coming home from his therapy session, he hangs up his jacket in the hallway as your voice lets him know where you are. 
Iwaizumi puts the flowers he bought for you on the kitchen table before he sneaks into the bedroom and sees you trying to unfold the sheets to put them on the blankets. With silent steps, he reaches around your waist to throw you onto the bed with him, wrapped in the covers that were in your hands earlier. Screaming, you laugh in unison with his chuckle as you look into each other’s eyes. “Hajime! Don’t scare me like that.” you laugh softly, while his hand gently tucks your hair behind your ear. Iwaizumi looks at your forehead, at the small scar that is left from your injury, before leaning forward and giving you a kiss on that spot.
“I’m sorry, but that was just so tempting,” he says, closing his eyes as he pulls you closer and just relaxes in bed with you. He strokes your back and kisses your forehead once more. “Hajime... what’s going on? Why are you so clingy suddenly?” you laugh, but Iwaizumi doesn’t join in the laughter, instead answering you seriously.
“Today, six months ago, I almost lost you. I’m just grateful that nothing happened to you. Thankful that you gave me another chance, even though I showed my worst side.” You can’t think of the right words to answer him, so you just smile, snuggle closer to him, and close your eyes. Safe in his arms, with his pulsating heart at your ear, you fall asleep.
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tw: mention of abortion, mention of drugs/pills (without consent) 
Suna and you were just friends for a long time. Even if the others saw you more like a couple.
You were the only one Suna didn’t mind when you sat next to him and pulled out one of his earphones to listen to music with him.
You always had the same route to school and if one of you came to school alone, you knew immediately that the other one must be sick. 
With graduation, you mentioned that you might want to study abroad. That time, Suna had a weird feeling in his stomach for the first time. As if he was afraid of losing you.
That was the day he realised that he felt more for you than just friendship.
The same evening, he asked you to come over and watch a movie when he yawned in a very clichéd way to put his arm over your shoulder and pull you closer to him. He didn’t know why he was so nervous, but he just was.
A number of things went through his mind. What if you don’t feel the same way about him as he does about you? Will you still want to study abroad? Would you end your friendship with him if you didn’t feel the same way?
He tried to block out the questions and then, with his usual calmness, asked you if you could imagine anything more than a friendship. Luckily for him, you said yes.
From that moment on, everything was perfect. You had created your own little world over several years. You studied, and luckily not abroad. Suna was successful in volleyball, so you were both able to buy an apartment together quickly.
Just the two of you. Your friends were there from time to time, but in the evenings you were always alone at home, arm in arm, in the quiet flat without any noise or other people to disturb you.
Until one morning where you look at the little piece of plastic in the bathroom, stunned, when the two red stripes tell you that you are pregnant.
You hadn’t spoken to Suna about having children yet, but you’ve been together for so long now and everything is going well that you assume he would be just as happy as you are.
You thought…
When Suna comes home, you’ve already prepared a little surprise. There are a pair of baby shoes on the table in the living room, the pregnancy test in front of them and a little balloon with “Best Dad” written on it. You can’t help smiling as you see Suna walk into the room when you call out “surprise”, looking a little shy in his direction. But Suna’s reaction differed from what you expected.
Almost disgusted, he looks in your direction. “This better be one of those stupid TikTok pranks, right?” he says, and your smile disappears abruptly. Your stomach turns and you feel sick. And not because of the pregnancy. You stand there irritated, only able to utter a quiet “No... it’s not a joke”, confused by his negative reaction. “No? What week are you in? Tell me you can still have an abortion...” he says, annoyed, as he walks towards the table to see if there is any information about the week of pregnancy on the pregnancy test. 
“What?” you say in bewilderment, still looking at Suna, who throws the test on the table in frustration before starting to massage his temples. “We’ll go to the gynecologist tomorrow, okay? Get rid of it. A child means responsibility. You have to look after this thing all the time, you’re no longer flexible and it’s noisy too... I just don’t want that.” 
His words feel like a thousand stabs. Never have you seen Suna act like this before. You anticipated that he might be a bit taken by surprise and perhaps not be able to deal with the situation at first, but Suna seems to have a very clear opinion on the subject. He doesn’t even seem to be willing to talk. But abort a child? Let Suna’s and your baby die just like that? You can’t do that. You don’t want that. 
The two of argue. Suna’s look gets progressively angrier. Yours sadder until he decides to leave the house with a “Do what you want, maybe it’ll die anyway”. Now you’re home alone with his painful words. You stand rooted to the spot in the room for several more minutes until the strength in your legs finally gives way and you slump to the floor, crying bitterly. The night, you spend alone in your bed, without Suna. He doesn’t answer his phone and doesn’t reply to your messages. You don’t hear from him the next day either, and he hasn’t come home. Thank God you get a message from Osamu, who texts you that Suna is with him and that you have nothing to worry about. But how are you supposed to stay at home without worrying if your boyfriend doesn’t get in touch with you and you’ve been arguing for days? You are scared. Afraid for the baby, afraid for the relationship and everything you two have built up.
Another day passes. You lie in bed, tired and lacking in energy. Nevertheless, you pull yourself together and get up, go to the bathroom to get ready for the day and don’t notice when the front door opens and Suna walks in. “Baby doll, I’m at home... and... I’m sorry...” you hear Suna’s voice and walk out of the bathroom. Even though you had a fight, you are still happy to see the man you love so much again. With a somewhat sad smile, he stands there, a bouquet of flowers in his hand as he approaches you.
“I’m really sorry. I behaved like an ass. You took me by surprise with the news and somehow... I don’t know. What do you say you sit down now? I’ll make us a drink and we can talk about all this. About the baby, and what happens next?” You can hardly believe his words. What has Osamu done in the last few days to make Suna suddenly do a full turnaround and be willing to talk to you openly, without shouting about becoming a parent? You make a mental note to thank Osamu later, before nodding with a smile and sitting down on the sofa in the living room.
But what you don’t know is that Suna went to a friend, a doctor, who gave him two pills before he came home. Pills for an induction of abortion. You have to take one now and the other two to three days later.
Suna knows that you wouldn’t take these pills voluntarily.
So he makes sure that you are indeed sitting in the living room before he takes out a small bag containing a pill, puts it in the grinder and turns it into a fine powder before mixing it into your iced tea.
He takes a deep breath, putting his smile back on as he walks towards you in the living room, where you are already waiting for him with happy eyes.
Without saying much, he hands you the glass, sits down next to you and watches you.
“I know it’s all so sudden and I could have said it differently. I really took you completely by surprise with the news,” you say quietly, looking at the iced tea in your hand, unaware that an abortion pill is floating there.
Suna listens attentively as you talk about how you first had to understand what a pregnancy means, but that your overwhelm quickly turned into joy because you are looking forward to holding a mini version of the two of you in your arms in less than 9 months. You talk about all the beautiful things that are going through your head, while Suna continues to listen to you, his eyes constantly focus on the tea in your hands and you.
He keeps looking at you as you raise the glass and press it to your lips, ready to drink the poison cocktail, when he realizes what he was doing. What he’s trying to do here.
Panic strikes him. His green eyes widen as he literally knocks the cup out of your hand. It falls to the floor with a loud thud. “Don’t drink that!” he says in an unsteady voice and looks at you in horror.
But you don’t understand anything, only shake your head.
“I don’t know what’s gotten into me. I... I think I just made the worst mistake of my life,” Suna says, looking back from you to the broken cup. You don’t understand what’s going on and tilt your head, asking him if everything is all right. But when Suna continues talking and tells you what was in your tea, your world collapses. You are shocked that your own boyfriend wanted to do this to you. “I was overwhelmed. I... I know that’s no excuse. But when I heard you talking, I realized that -“ Suna wanted to continue, but your voice cut him off, your words silenced him.
“Let’s break up,” you say, and unlike before, unlike when you argued a week ago, your voice is determined now, your eyes full of pain and betrayal. Those green eyes that used to mesmerize you are now looking at you desperately. “What?” Suna whispers softly, followed by a “No, wait”. But you interrupt him again.
“You just wanted to give me some drugs without my consent so I’d lose the baby?! No, Rintarou… I’m breaking up with you. That... no, I can’t do that.” Abruptly, you get up from the sofa, ignoring the hand that tries to grab you before quickly slipping into a jacket and a pair of shoes just to leave the apartment. Suna wants to run after you, but his legs won’t move. His mind and heart are screaming to run after you, to stop you and tell you he’s sorry, but his body just won’t obey him. When he finally manages to get up, you’re already gone.
Still wearing his slippers and without putting on a jacket, he eventually runs out to check out all the places you love, all your friends, to see if he can find you somewhere. But no matter where he looks, he can’t find you. You don’t reply to messages or phone calls. The mechanical voice of your voice mail greets him directly. “Shit, shit, shit!” he yells as he stands in the park where you two had your first official date. The surrounding people look at him. Some with an irritated look, some as if they were pitying him.
Without really knowing where to go, your legs automatically led you to the bus that goes to Kita’s home.
Kita was one of your best friends back then. And you knew that if you went to Kita and told him not to tell Suna that you were there, he wouldn’t tell his friend either. And that’s exactly what Kita did.
You were in Kita’s guest room when you heard Suna’s voice in the hallway.
He sounded shattered, broken, as he begged Kita to tell him where you were.
This went on for several weeks, until one evening Suna rang the doorbell again, trying to talk to Kita in a voice you had never heard before.
His voice was so thin, so fragile, as if a heap of misery was speaking out of him.
Kita tells him once again that he doesn’t know where you are when you hesitantly open the door, thinking about going downstairs and listening to what Suna has to say. But for now, you just listen to the conversation.
“Please, Shinsuke, I know you know her location. Please, just give her this. Please...” Kita sighs, followed by a soft “ok...” before the front door closes. Your best friend’s footsteps creak beneath the floor as he walks up the stairs, looks at you a little twisted and hands you a large package.
You know that you demand a lot from Kita. It’s not easy for him to lie to his friend either. Eventually you have to talk to Suna.
Alone in your guest room, you spend almost half an hour looking at the unopened package at the other end of the bed until you finally decide to open it. When you see what’s inside, surprise catches you. Multiple emotions flow through your body without you even noticing how your eyes suddenly turn glassy. Small letters and several items are in the box. You take out the letter that is on top of all the other items.
“My love, I don’t even know where to start. I can’t apologize for what I did. Nevertheless, I want to tell you that I’m sorry. I was confused and scared. Our relationship has always been perfect so far and I thought it was great that it was just the two of us and that no one else disturbed our privacy. I was afraid that when we had a child, we would argue, have no more time for each other, and grow apart. I was selfish and didn’t think about how you would feel. I wasn’t thinking about our baby. The thought that we were both going to be parents hadn’t crossed my mind at all. But every time I walked past those little shoes you had placed in the living room, I couldn’t think of anything else but seeing our child standing in them. How it tries to move around in it, sometimes falls down because it loses its balance and seeks shelter with its beloved mom. I regret every second of what I’ve done, every word I’ve said. Hurting you was the last thing I wanted to do, and yet I did it. I am sorry. I am so terribly sorry.
I did some research. Did you know that it is currently very difficult to find midwives? You should probably start looking very early on. My team colleague gave me the number of the midwife he and his wife had at the birth of their two children. I also have three other numbers. You might want to give them a call. There are also birth preparation classes in our town. I have also put a brochure in the package for you. You don’t necessarily have to go there with your partner. With me… So... if you want, you could also go there with Kita, even if I would be happy if we both did it together. But I can understand if you don’t want to.
Are you eating enough? You should pay particular attention to your diet during pregnancy. A lot of women suffer from a vitamin deficiency during pregnancy. But you have probably already discussed this with your gynecologist. Anyway, I’ve written down a few recipes for you that are rich in vitamins. I admit that Osamu helped me a little with this. Oh, and on the back are some things you shouldn’t eat during pregnancy. Raw eggs and products containing them such as ice cream, mayonnaise and so on... you should not eat them, because the risk of salmonella infection is high. Peanuts can contain aflatoxins, which can also harm the fetus... but as I said, I’ve put together a list for you. In case you didn’t already know all this already. There are a few other things in the box. Maybe you’d like to take a look.
I hope you are doing well. I hope the baby is doing well too. Have you thought of a name yet? Do you know whether it will be a boy or a girl? I’m sure there’s already a little bump on your belly. I... would really like to be with you right now. Would love to hold you in my arms and stroke your tummy. I know I made a mistake that can never be fixed. But if you’re willing, if that’s what you want, I’d really like to be by your side again. And if not as your boyfriend, then as the father of our baby. I would like to do couples’ therapy with you so that we can find our way back to each other… So that you can trust me again. Because in all of this, I was the problem and never you. But only if you want it too, of course. I know it may be hard to believe, but I love you. So much that a life without you scares me. I am sorry…”
You’re crying bitterly by now as your tears blur the ink on the letter before you put it aside and look in the box. Next to a small onesie for babies, there is a note with the telephone numbers of midwives, a small book with recipes, the brochure he had mentioned and another box containing photos and memories. Pictures that Suna had always secretly taken of you at times when he thought you looked extra pretty. You always found the photos embarrassing, but for him they were beautiful to look at. Because they were moments when you were just being you, not smiling for the camera or doing anything else to disguise yourself.
There was also a necklace with shells on it in the box. You made it for Suna when you were on vacation in Croatia. It turned out incredibly ugly, yet Suna wore it proudly during the whole vacation. You’re touched that he still has this ugly necklace. Little notes that you wrote to each other at school are also in there. So many more memories from the past. Where had Suna hidden this little box in your apartment so that you never noticed it?
You hastily get up, open the door and run down to the hallway as Kita comes out of the living room and looks at you questioningly. “Is everything all right? Do you need to see a doctor?” He asks concerned, but you just shake your head, wanting nothing more than to see Suna, talk to him again. He asks you if you are absolutely sure, but your determined nod is enough for an answer. So he grabs his jacket and car keys, driving you straight to your ex boyfriend, to your apartment. He doesn’t want you to take the bus in your current state.
Suna is sitting in the living room. In front of him on the coffee table are various reports on pregnancy, parenting and more. His head is leaning on his hands as he takes a deep breath. Have you opened his package yet? He wonders, unable to think clearly, when he hears the key in the door lock and runs into the hallway as if stung by a tarantula. His eyes are wide as he looks at you, standing rooted to the spot in the doorway, not knowing how to react.
“Shinsuke... Drove me here...” you say. “I opened your package.” You continue, watching Suna swallow hard, still not moving an inch from the doorframe. “How are you, the baby?” he asks quietly, almost absent-mindedly, as if he can’t believe you’re really standing in front of him. “Good... can... can we talk?” you ask and watch him nod, having trouble sorting out his feelings. You take a step towards him, clearly seeing the dark circles, the red eyes, the slightly thinner face, as if he has lost weight. And on closer look, you can see his whole body trembling.
“Is everything you wrote in your letter true?” you ask him, trying to keep your voice as calm as possible, even though you’re at your wits’ end. “Yes, yes all of it. I’m sorry for everything... I want nothing more than to see you happy. To see our baby happy. And if you want another partner by your side to be happy, if you don’t want me in your life, then I will accept that.” Suna whispers, knowing that if he were to speak even a little louder, his voice would fail and he would cry. You take another step towards him. “What if I want you? Want to give it another try?” You have barely spoken your sentence before you hear a bitter shuffle from Suna, which he seems to have been suppressing the whole time. His shaky hands carefully reach for your face before he presses his forehead against yours and says softly, “I would wish for nothing more than that.”
Although you hesitate for a second, you finally put your hands around his back and stand with him in the doorway for a while. Neither of you says a word. Both of you let your tears run until Suna releases you at some point and gives you a kiss on the forehead. “You shouldn’t stand for so long. You’d better get some rest,” he says in a somewhat steady voice before helping you out of your jacket and leading you into the bedroom, where he pushes the sheets aside so you can lie down. 
“Rin, but I’m not tired at all...” you say, even though you are exhausted, but Suna lies down right next to you, pulling you close while his free hand moves to your stomach. “I know... But... let’s just lie here like this for a moment, regain our strength before we talk... Talk about everything, our future, how I can make it up to you, our little baby… Agree, baby doll?” He whispers tiredly. Yet you also notice how all the crying is slowly making you a little tired. “Agree, Rin.” you smile weakly, snuggling closer to him as you both fall asleep arm in arm, his hand protectively on your baby bump, your hand on his.
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inbarfink ¡ 1 year ago
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Okay, so I already wrote a bunch of stuff about how that scene, although it is really sweet, is also kind of a Bad Sign for Simon - how he refuses to learn the Obvious Lesson from the Winterworld adventure (that being the Ice King again is probably a really really bad idea). But I want to talk about it also a little more about what it means for Fionna’s character as well. 
Because while sitting around and wallowing in self-loathing is probably bad for Fionna, especially after being told that she shouldn't be allowed to exist, and Simon is right to try and get her out of her funk. It's also still worthwhile for Fionna to have some introspection about the Consequences of Her Actions. Because she and Cake really did not consider them at all at first. They have a sense of morality and an instinct towards heroism, but they also tend to kinda forget the fantastical worlds they visit don’t exist entirely for their fantasy and have kind of a Protagonist-Centered-Morality fallacy. 
Most obviously you can see it in the market in Ooo. How Cake, in her excitement, damaged and hurt and even killed
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A bunch of innocent marketgoers without even noticing. And then Fionna immediately jumped to Cake’s defense against these ‘weirdos’, who were actually just normal kinda-righteously-angry Oooian citizens.
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It’s actually very similar to the whole Winterworld situation. Fionna’s assumption that she’s automatically the hero and protagonist of the story and black-and-white view of the situation and her tendency to kick ass first and ask questions later meant that she just recklessly injured a lot of innocent people.
(It might’ve been worse actually cause at least in Winterworld she was at least manipulated by an evil Wizard)
Fionna and Cake clearly have a great potential for heroism, but they do need to be a bit more considerate of the situation and people around them. And it does make sense considering that from their perspective - they’ve been living a very ordinary life up until now (and Cake was literally an animal. A very clever animal, but still not bound by the same standards of morality as the talking animals in Ooo). Action and adventure and fantasy stuff has been purely the realm of daydream and video games for them - and Fionna literally speaks about it in these terms.
(also, Fionna's Main Character Syndrome was undoubtedly validated when God literally told her that she was created to be the main character of her universe)
So yeah, it takes them some time to really process how to be heroes - they need to grapple with questions that Finn and Jake already kinda dealt with seventeen years ago. And actually a lot of those; how to resolve a situation without necessarily using violence, when does a 'villain' actually deserve sympathy and kindness, the importance of the larger context of any given conflict... their confrontations with Ice King all played a big part in that. It was never just him, but he was still a very major part.
And for Fionna and Cake right now, learning these lessons require some amount of personal introspection. So while it was a sweet attempt at comforting, I dunno if Simon’s little ‘the only problem with that universe is that this Alternative Me was terrible because he didn’t even acknowledge or remember Betty as the love of our life and the light of my entire universe’ thing is actually Good. 
I’m not quite sure Simon is the best person to teach Fionna and Cake heroism 101, because he is so focused on the Crown Quest as the thing that brings back Meaning to his life, and because his fatherly instincts just kinda go “Sad Young Person???? MUST GIVE COMFORT!” and also on account of the kidnapping.
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I’m sure Fionna is going to become the heroine she dreams about eventually, it’s just going to be a bumpy ride. The best we can hope for is that they accept Simon’s comfort, that she doesn't start believing that she is nothing but an Error for the entire universe like the Scarab claims, but don’t necessarily listen to all of Simon's his words either.
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vidavalor ¡ 29 days ago
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The Movie
The most important thing is that he's gone.
If you're feeling sad that it's not the full season and would like some reassurance about the rest of the story being movie-length, though?
Based on where the story is now? They can absolutely do this in 90 minutes. Would it have been more fun if it was the whole season? Of course. But they can do this in 90 minutes-- and do it well. I think there's actually less to go in the plot in the present than we might realize. How so?
I'm pretty sure the next part of the story has never really been plotted to be Supreme Archangel Aziraphale. The end game seems to me to be a bit more they all have to overthrow Heaven to save Aziraphale and that's how they save the world. Meaning, that was Satan with the coffee in The Final 15 and Aziraphale's fall is the plot. The kickoff here in the movie would be the same as it would have been if we had a full S3: the audience gets the hinted at 2.06 twist revealed in full right near the start when they see Aziraphale get to Heaven and be thrown to Hell by The Metatron. The other characters then quickly learn what's happened to Aziraphale. They band together to challenge Heaven--that's the whole Powell & Pressburger's 'A Matter of Life and Death' trial & how it fits into things.
Aziraphale won't accept a verdict that's just for him and not Crowley as well and the process of all of this winds up exposing and overthrowing The Metatron and Hell, freeing the demons. (Gabriel gets his suit back and is their lawyer, you just know it lol.) By coming together to save Aziraphale, the characters fix Heaven/Hell, which then saves Earth and permanently stops the threat of Armageddon. The remainder of the time is wrap up where Crowley & Aziraphale work through what's happened and then head to the South Downs.
All of that stuff in the present that I just said can actually be done inside of an hour, tops. Especially because no one has to set up the characters and story like they would if this were a stand-alone film. They can just dive straight in. That still leaves at least a half-hour--if not a bit more, depending-- for flashing us back to whatever we need to see that supports what's happening in the present (The Vavoom, 1941, probably Jane Austen, likely one or two other things we don't know we need to see yet). More than likely? This is a series of scenes like the S1 cold open more than it is a longer, single-era, flashback minisode. I don't think anyone would complain about another cold open-like sequence? 😊
The movie can work. For perspective? Look at the chart below.
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We are at the Big Twist that is The Act II Climax & it's really almost fully done already. All that's left in that Big Twist is to just overtly tell it to the audience because The Final 15 already did all hinting the set up work for it.
As you can see, we're really just moments away from everyone regrouping for the big, final push of the story-- the Act III Climax/overthrowing Heaven-- before we're into the South Downs Cottage ending. This is one of the reasons why I think that S1 showed us Monday-Sunday of The Last Week of the World: Round One with Armageddon being stopped on Saturday but S2 revealed we were watching The Last Week of the World: Round Two... but then stopped the season early on Friday morning. S3, imho, has always been going to pick up within hours of where the 2.06 cliffhanger ended and show us the mirrored Saturday & Sunday of this week that we still have out there.
They won't need to set up at the start of the film where characters are years later because the S2 story we were watching was always written for S3 to pick up basically right where the S2 cliffhanger leaves off. S3 was always going to continue directly the story of S2 rather than come at the story from a place of a dead stop of years having gone by. I think the best way to look at the movie might be as if it is really the S2 finale. Think of it as if S2 actually has 8 episodes but we've only seen 6 of them so far and we're still awaiting the last two.
Each season of the show, in and of itself, follows that above Three Act Structure, even if the overall series of Good Omens is also following it for its overall story as well. Think back on the last two episodes of S1, which would then be similar in some structural elements and in pacing to this movie.
The Act III Climax in S1 is Armageddon being stopped in Tadfield. That will be overthrowing Heaven in the movie. The Obstacle that followed in S1 as a result of stopping Armageddon and which led into the wrap-up conclusion was Heaven & Hell coming after Crowley & Aziraphale/the body swap plot. When Crowley and Aziraphale solved those obstacles-- in short time, as this is part of the wrap-up-- we then left them dining at The Ritz on Sunday afternoon. These episodes were a very clear-cut example of what an Act III in Three Act Structure within a season looks like and it is likely-- structurally-- going to be very similar to what the model for the finale movie will be. The pacing will be a lot alike, just with some flashbacks in the mix.
Think about how little time it actually took to stop Armageddon once everyone was in Tadfield-- and that most of the finale was just getting characters who had already been set up earlier in the story to Tadfield for that to happen. That's about how much time it's going to take them to overthrow Heaven in the movie. We've actually already watched most of the set up in the story to get to that place in S2. Then, think about how the Obstacles part in S1 was the body swap plot... but how that same type of obstacle wouldn't exist in the S3 movie. Why?
Because this movie is going to stop Armageddon permanently by overthrowing Heaven & Hell. Unlike in S1, when Crowley and Aziraphale were still being targeted, they're going to be truly free for the first time ever by this same point in the S3 movie. So, what are the Obstacles then? Their own stuff. This is where we would get the scenes of two of them having the chance to fully talk through The Final 15 of S2 and, in the process, understand where everything went wrong and have the South Downs Cottage then be the happy ending.
There's plenty of space for this in the story because this is where it's all leading and the part about overthrowing Heaven and Hell-- that Act III Climax that sets up this ending? Going into the movie after where S2 left off, we're actually only a heartbeat away from it already.
This is all very do-able within 90 minutes, with plenty of room for things like The Vavoom and 1941. It might not be the full season that we hoped for but the story is in a way better place to wrap this up with a movie than most shows in this position would be.
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babyangelsky ¡ 5 months ago
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I know we're all still sweating over the first half of this episode (or I am at least) but since I'm feeling chatty today, I really wanna talk about Mut and Tongrak's conversation at the restaurant and how much I loved it. There are so many little moments that deserve appreciation and recognition.
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This is the first one. When the auntie comes over to sing Mut's praises, he doesn't look at her or at Tongrak, he just ducks his head. From what she says, we can gather that this isn't the first time he's brushed off compliments so it isn't that he's not used to praise. I think there's a little more to it.
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And look at Tongrak's expression after the auntie leaves.
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And the way he looks at Mut afterward. There's fondness there. There's respect and admiration. We've had small moments before this where the way Tongrak looks at Mut changes but this feels like the first time he really sees him. He's getting a clearer picture of who Mut is and what he means to the people in the village.
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And it's because of that that he looks genuinely surprised and a little shocked when Mut reveals that his father kicked him out at 15. You can almost hear him asking himself, "how could anyone ever do that to this man?"
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Mut talks about how he went to live with his aunt and started supporting himself relatively casually but there's a faraway look in his eyes when Tongrak asks why he doesn't go home.
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And he looks down because despite his tone, it hurts to remember why he can't go home. It makes him sad to remember why he considers the fishing boat only his father's instead of theirs, as a family.
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There's a defiance in his expression when he says that his father never takes back what he says and neither does he, and there was something about this specific wording and look that made me think that the reason his father kicked him out has to do with him being queer.
I have not read the novel (nor am I asking for spoilers) so I could be very wrong but this moment just read so queer to me. It unfortunately wouldn't be unheard of for a parent to kick out their queer child and for that child to cut ties with them because of it.
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The shift in expression when Mut asks Tongrak if he thinks he's pitiful is so tiny but it's so significant. It's like he's daring Tongrak to pity him and resigned to it simultaneously, like pity is a foregone conclusion. It tells me that Mut is used to being pitied. He says himself moments before this that Tongrak could ask anyone on the island for his story so I'm sure there's no shortage of people who do pity him.
Maybe that's why he reacts the way he does when the auntie praises him. Maybe for him it's rare to be praised for his successes without having it be qualified or run through the filter of his personal history.
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Even before Tongrak said a word in response, I knew what his answer was going to be. There's sympathy (and maybe even some empathy) in his expression. There's a sort of...I don't know how to describe it. Defiant kinship? that says, "why would I pity you?"
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He shakes his head and gives a firm, decisive no. He doesn't pity Mut. He may not say it, but his face says that he's very quickly growing to admire and respect the person Mut has made of himself.
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Of course he doesn't pity Mut. And hearing it makes Mut smile. A true, genuine smile that reaches his sparkly eyes and softens just a little bit when he says thank you.
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This conversation felt like such a big shift for them. I have no doubt they're going to continue to bicker and annoy each other and piss each other off but from here on I think and hope there's going to be an undercurrent of understanding to it.
Tongrak is open to learning more about Mut and although Tongrak isn't willing to reveal too much of himself yet, the desire to learn more is there on Mut's part, too. He's not gonna push though. He accepts Tongrak's answer of why he became a writer being only for the fun of it.
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And he does what no one else has before and praises Tongrak for it.
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Which Tongrak was not expecting at all because why would he when no one has ever complimented him before? For Mut to be the first means a lot, and so does the fact that Tongrak compliments him right back.
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Because I really do think that his compliment is coming from a place not only of respect, but from solidarity as well. We know that Tongrak doesn't want the people in the village to think badly of Mut for being affectionate with a man in public, and that moment also read very queer to me.
Queer people are like magnets and, in my experience at least, not only are we drawn to each other, we look out for each other. Tongrak doesn't give a damn what people think or say about him both because he's secure in who he is and because he's only a tourist, but Mut lives there. Despite his snark and snippiness, I don't think he wants Mut to have a hard time existing in his home.
Anyway! Those are just my few cents for this episode. This scene really stuck out to me and I wanted to talk about it because the whole time I was just:
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Fort and Peat did some beautifully subtle acting and I didn't want it to get lost in the horny shuffle.
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miley1442111 ¡ 5 months ago
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dinner revelations and reactions- r.cameron (part 3)
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a/n: this takes place in a au where the stuff that happens in the show doesn't happen :)
tropes: childhood bestfriends to lovers, enemies to lovers
pairing: rafe cameron x fem! reader, jj maybank x reader (dw, not for long)
(use of Y/n, and the nickname Bunny/ bun (but i promise not in a weird way there's a story to it i swear it's not just one of those weird smut things))
summary: rafe and you finally confront each other and it doesn't end as planned, neither does you night...
warnings: mentions of drugs and drug use and drinking, fighting, cursing, rafe is a dick, rafe's mental health, reader is going through it, smut (18+)(fade to black a little bit??) , kissing, alcohol, having sex while being drunk (?), drinking, kind of alcohol abuse, mentions of dead parents and sibling, rafe being jealous, rafe is also going through it (and I think that's it?)
not entirely proofread
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Rafe sat across from you, and you felt his eyes on you the whole time. He had no right to be affecting you like this, making you nervous, making you irritated, worst of all, making you feel anything. 
“So, Bunny,” Ward started. “How are your folks? I haven’t heard from them in a while.”
You felt your throat close, and an uncontrollable coughing fit started. Sarah hit your back and it finally stopped, but you excused yourself for a moment, not knowing what to do. You walked to the kitchen, a glass of water in hand, different to the strawberry daiquiri on the table, the one that Rose had insisted on making you. You felt yourself tear up as you thought about your lonely life. The past 3 had been the worst of your life. Coming home to an empty house, having to clean out their bedroom and everything else they owned, having no choice in how they went. A lot of your college friends ditched you at that time too, you didn't tell them what happened and you stopped coming out with them, so you drifted. It was so fucking hard. And explaining it would be difficult too. 
You hadn’t even noticed you’d started crying until Rafe had put his arms around you. 
And then there was the Rafe heartbreak. Your best friend and first love drifting away mere months after you moved to a whole new place, full of new people, and new ways to live. It was unfunny how upset you’d been, not leaving your room (except for going to school or for mealtimes), you almost broke your phone, you were so upset, and you got rid of anything (aside from the friendship bracelet you still wore) that reminded you of him. 
But for just a millisecond, you allowed yourself to enjoy him being there for you. 
Despite promising yourself that you’d never speak to him again when you turned 16 and he hadn’t replied in months, when big life events happened, you’d texted him. You’d texted him when your parents died, when you graduated with honours, when you got accepted into your dream college, and every single time, it always said that he read your messages. He knew what was going on, he knew you needed him, and he did nothing. 
You pushed him off of you and sighed. “Don’t try to comfort me now. That’s not fair,” you whispered, trying to stop yourself from crying. 
“Bun, please I’m-” he started, trying to take your hand, trying to make you look at him. To see the distress he was in, to notice the effect you had on him, to know that he still cared about you. 
“No!” you groaned, crossing your arms and moving further away from him. Thank god they had a huge kitchen. Rafe was always the focal point in every room, he drew attention in from everyone. His charisma, his smile, his looks, everything. Every time you entered a room he was in you were engulfed by Rafe, and it wasn’t fair. “Rafe, I don’t want your pity!-”
“It’s not pity-”
“Well I don’t want your help!” You finally stopped crying, the sadness easing but all that was left in its wake was rage. “I needed you, when I was a scared 15 year old girl in a new city, on the other side of  the country, I needed you when my brother died, I needed you when my parents died, I needed you when I was scared to move to college, I needed you when my first boyfriend and I broke up, and you weren’t there Rafe. But just because I needed you then, does not mean I need you now. You are exactly what is wrong with everyone on this island. You’re a prejudiced, privileged, piece of shit, asshole, drunk, with too much time and money on his hands. Get a job, work for something, for anything.” 
Rafe just stood there in shock. You pushed past him, rejoining the table.
“Sorry about that,” you chuckled. “My parents…” You paused and took a deep breath. “They died three years ago, sorry I didn’t call to let you know.” 
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Rafe sat across from you, and he had no idea what he was going to do. 
“So, Bunny,” Ward started and he rolled his eyes. Bunny had been a nickname Rafe had given you, and it had always bothered him when his dad used it, or when Rose used it, or when basically anyone but him used it . “How are your folks? I haven’t heard from them in a while.”
Rafe watched as your coughing fit began and he knew why. A sense of dread settled itself deep in his stomach and he sighed when you left to get a glass of water. He started getting up, then turned to Rose. “She doesn’t fucking like strawberry darquiri’s,” he spat.
He walked into the kitchen as quietly as possible, seeing how you sobbed with a hand over your mouth over the sink. He couldn’t help but feel partly responsible, and he hated seeing you cry. He felt you stiffen and quiet when he pulled his arms around you, then he held you closer as you started crying more. He’d missed you so damn much. He knew he should’ve responded, even after all these years, even when he fucking yearned to talk to you. But he’d made his bed and he had to lie in it. 
Losing you was one of the hardest things he’d ever gone through, and it wasn’t like his mom, where he could blame external forces, he was stuck with knowing that you being gone was his doing. That he’d driven you away at the ripe old age of 14. He loved you, and you’d left, but he just couldn’t see a universe where someone as lovely as you wanted him to stay, so he left. And he was stupid for leaving, and even worse for not apologising, but he was never known to go back on his word. As he held you, he thought about all the time his dad had said something, had hit him, and he thought about the fact that he could’ve talked to you. He could’ve called and asked for your advice, he could’ve heard your voice.  
And he noticed how your hands stayed on his body, not pushing him away, and he smiled. 
He felt awful for his behaviour. He should’ve been there for you when your brother and when your parents died. He knew he should’ve driven to fucking California and held you at the funeral. Let you cry on his shoulder. He should’ve been sending you supportive texts as you entered college, he should’ve been facetiming you asking about courses and classes, he should’ve been there to tell you that your asshole boyfriend wasn’t the shit. He remembered how he’d gone on a two-day bender when you texted him to say you had a boyfriend. He’d never been so jealous, and he hadn’t seen you in years. But he knew, he knew your spirit and he knew how beautiful you’d grown up to be. He knew your personality and your smile. It wasn’t fair what he did, but he knew this wasn’t about him. So, he just enjoyed being wanted by you, even if it was just for a few minutes. He didn’t deserve you in any capacity, but you still stood in the kitchen, his arms around you as you cried. 
You pushed him off of you and sighed. “Don’t try to comfort me now. That’s not fair,” you whispered. And the moment was over, but Rafe still had to try. 
“Bun, please I’m-” he started, trying to take your hand. He needed you to see him. He needed you to look at him, and look at the desperation in his eyes. He needed to explain that he hadn’t felt alive since you’d been gone, and having you here, being able to hold you? It had brought him back to life. 
“No!” you groaned, crossing your arms and moving further away from him. Fuck this huge kitchen, he wanted you closer to him, but he knew not to overstep. He stood at the sink and you paced slowly. Rafe was being driven out of his mind with these mixed signals. This wasn’t fair. “Rafe, I don’t want your pity!-”
“It’s not pity-” He tried to reason, his anger bubbling, but he took a deep breath to try and settle it. 
“Well I don’t want your help!” You finally stopped crying, the sadness easing but all that was left in its wake was rage. “I needed you, when I was a scared 15 year old girl in a new city, on the other side of  the country, I needed you when my brother died, I needed you when my parents died, I needed you when I was scared to move to college, I needed you when my first boyfriend and I broke up, and you weren’t there Rafe. But just because I needed you then, does not mean I need you now. You are exactly what is wrong with everyone on this island. You’re a prejudiced, privileged, piece of shitty, drunk, with too much time and money on his hands. Get a job, work for something, for anything.” 
Rafe just stood there in shock. You pushed past him, rejoining the table. He felt sick. No one had ever called him out like that, you had never spoken to him like that. He stood in the kitchen, and for the first time in years, he cried. He felt a genuine tear fall down his face and he knew he was fucked. 
-------------
You showed up outside John B’s place, wanting to find Jj. None of it made any sense, it never had. Rafe, your parents, your brother, everything. 
“Hey Y/n,” He smiled, opening the door. You pushed past him inside and to his bedroom. “Everything ok?” He asked, following you.
“Do you have something strong?” You asked and he smirked. 
“Yeah,” he reached behind you to a cabinet and produced a bottle of Polmos Spirytus Rektyfikowany Vodka. 
“What’s that?” You asked, looking over to Polish bottle. 
“95% abv,” he smirked. “Strongest out there.”
You uncapped it and took a large swig. Jj chuckled when you had no reaction. 
“Good,” he smirked, then took the bottle off of you and drank some himself. 
The night went on through a haze of alcohol, laughter, and a weird energy in the air, something you couldn’t exactly put your finger on. 
“You tired?” He asked, a smile on his face. 
You didn’t answer, just pressing your lips to his. His hands grabbed your waist as you pulled him down on top of you. You needed to forget, to be distracted for a few hours, for one night to not be inside your own mind. Jj could serve that purpose, and maybe more. You just knew you needed to stop thinking.
“A-are you sure?” He asked, pulling away for a beat as you pulled his shirt off. 
“So sure,” you nodded and kissed him again. He smirked as you desperately pulled at his hair. 
He pulled down your trousers and pants in one fluid motion and he groaned. “You’re fucking gorgeous. All of you.”
He smashed his lips onto yours once again. Next his pants were down and he wax putting a condom on, then he was inside you and fuck. He was big. 
“Jj!” you whined as he sunk into you. His forehead was already laced with sweat. 
“Yeah baby?’ he gritted out, using all of his self-control to give you a minute to adjust. 
“So big,” you groaned. 
“You can take it,” he grunted as he started to move. You were so wet, so tight, so perfect. He couldn’t get you out of his head, and this was a lot better than what he was imagining. 
-------------
You weren’t sure what time it was when you fell asleep, but you were fucking exhausted. You fell asleep with his arms around you, and you woke up the same way, with your head pounding and the uncontrollable urge to vomit.
What had you done?
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obx masterlist :)
navigation for my blog :) (criminal minds, obx, the bear, marvel, top gun, the hunger games, challengers :)
taglist: (comment to be added :))
@hockeybabe87 @maybankslover @anightlikethisss @linaaaaa654 @ijustwanttoreadlols @ihe4rttwd @sunny1616 @wearemadeofstardust0 @rafeecameronsbitch @drewswifeeee @lovegeorgia @houseofperfecttaste @ymnizuh
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mariclerc ¡ 7 months ago
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Petite sizes | cl16 & gr63
Summary: A girls' day out with your mom goes wrong, but your boys are always to the rescue.
Warning: mean words by reader's mom, Charles and George being supportive of you, a lot of fluff.
a/n: Hi guys! This is the first story/blurb in the "Poly!drivers" section, I hope you like it!! I accept suggestions and I would also like to know if you want a part two of this!!
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You walk through the door, kicking off your shoes and letting out a tired sigh. Charles and George are sprawled on the couch, watching one of Gordon Ramsay's many cooking shows, hearing your sigh, they both turned their heads to look at you. You had gone to the mall with your mom to have a girls' day out, but, as always, she made one of her discreet comments about your body and that hurt you a lot.
“Hey guys...” you say with a shy smile that didn't reached out your eyes.
“Hey gorgeous, how was girls' day with your mom?” Charles asked sweetly.
”Did you find anything nice?” now George asked softly.
You hesitate, a flicker of sadness crossing your face. You plop down on the couch between them, snuggling into Charles' side.
“Well, there was this one shirt I really liked, but... it didn't fit right.” you say shyly.
George reaches over and gently squeezes your hand. “Oh no, that's a bummer. Was it too big or too small?”
You shake your head. “It was marked as a small, but it was way too big... You know that I usually use small or extra small, but nothing ever fits just right.” You bite your lip, trying to hold back tears. “And my mom... she didn't help either. She just called me a crybaby for being frustrated and said that because I'm "so small" and "like a dwarf," I can't find clothes that fit.”
Tears well up in your eyes, and Charles pulls you into a tight hug. ”Oh mon petit chou, don't listen to her. You're perfect just the way you are, petite et adorable.” (my little darling) (little and adorable)
George kisses your forehead. “She's just being a silly woman. You're beautiful, no matter what size clothes you wear, we just love you just the way you are, darling.”
They both shower you with kisses and gentle words, their love and support washing away the sting of your mother's hurtful words. You snuggle closer to them, feeling safe and loved.
“Thank you both... I love you my babies!” you smile softly at them.
Charles and George smile at each other, happy to see you feeling better. “On t'aime aussi, mon amour.” (we love you too, my love)
“You are our little princess okay? And we love you so much baby.” George whispers.
They hold you close, their love a warm shield against any negativity. As you try to snuggle with them, a question comes to your mind.
“Ehm... Guys? I want to know something.” you say while fidgeting slightly.
“Anything on your mind, mon ange?” Charles asks as he raises an eyebrow. (my angel)
“Well... I was wondering... Do you guys like my small body? I know I shouldn't ask this, but doubts consume me...” You say a little blushing.
Charles and George exchange a playful look, a knowing smile spreading across their faces.
“Like it? Princess, you're adorable! We wouldn't have it any other way.” George's says teasingly.
Charles pulls you closer. “Your size is perfect for cuddling... We love being able to hold you completely in our arms.”
”And your small frame makes you look even more beautiful in our clothes... Just saying.” George says while nuzzling your neck.
You have a shy smile on your lips. “Really? Well... In that case... I'd like to wear one of Charlie's hoodies.” You pause briefly. “Because I feel comfortable in it... And it's warm!” you giggle.
Charles smiles. “Well, in that case, you can wear my hoodies baby! If they make you feel comfortable, you can do it, you don't have to ask permission for it, okay?” He says and you nod, George smiles too. Charles' throws his arm around you, leading you to the main room.
“And if it's a bit big, don't worry babe. We can always roll up the sleeves and make it extra cozy!” George says as he follows you both into the main room.
You laugh and blush a little bit, the warmth of their affection chasing away any lingering doubts. As you slip into Charles' baby blue hoodie, engulfed by its soft embrace and their loving presence, you know that you are truly cherished and loved by your two boys, exactly as you are.
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whateversawesome ¡ 1 year ago
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Let's Talk About Yor
Something is going on with Yor lately. Have you noticed it too?
Even though she wasn't in every chapter of the latest big arc (Wheeler-Yuri-Twilight confrontation), the arc started with her and ended with her and I think there's a reason for that.
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As I mentioned before, Yor is a very emotionally intelligent character. She surpasses Twilight on this, who struggles with his own emotions and the emotions of others too.
So the way Yor works is by becoming aware of an emotion or a change within herself and then she reflects on that. Then, things happen to her and she reflects some more about that issue or emotion, which is usually connected to the things that are happening around her.
Example: Look at the chapters leading to the cruise arc. Fiona showed up and Yor started questioning her place in the Forger family. Everything seemed to be cleared out during that same visit, but then Loid went to a tennis tournament with Fiona and Yor kept thinking about this. When the tennis challenge happened, even though Yor won, this didn't make her feel better, quite the opposite. Finally, Loid reassured her during that date in the bar, right after he got kicked on the chin.
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That should have been it, right? Wrong. More things kept happening to Yor and she kept thinking about her place in the world, whether or not she should keep her assassin job until we finally get to that moment when she realizes her reason to keep on living and protecting is her family.
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I get the feeling we're now at a similar point in the manga. Somehow everything keeps pointing to Yor, specifically to Yor and her relationship with Loid. Look at what's happening to Yor and tell me what you think is coming:
1.That chat with her office friends about gripes, marriage and welcome home kisses.
2.The welcome home kiss that never happened when she got home.
3."The fight" she had with Loid, or more specifically: thinking about her husband while he was shot by Yuri. (Those sad eyes said a lot!).
4.That honest talk she had with Twilight where she tells him she wants to take care of him.
5.Her chat with Yuri, where her brother asked her if she loves Loid.
6.Meeting the Authens, a real marriage, and seeing them kiss. (The Authens' Theory here.)
See what I mean? If we take into consideration the way Yor grows as a character and the way she realizes things, then where is this heading?
It's clear Yor is about to realize she has feelings for Loid!
The way the story keeps pointing at a kiss with giant arrows is not a coincidence. For Yor, who is inexperienced, a kiss would mean true love and a real marriage (which is what she wants). If the almost kiss didn't happen at the beginning of the story (when Yuri visited) is because back then, the marriage wasn't real. Maybe they liked each other and a little more, but they had just met.
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Now about the first twiyor kiss...we'll you can read my theory on that here. And I'd like to add a little more...
I know I said I wanted it to happen in the movie, but I admit I was being waaaay too optimistic about it. Sadly, I don't think it'll happen in the movie. Like some of you mentioned, that moment belongs to the manga and I agree.
However, all that is happening with Yor is leading to that kiss. I still believe she'll be the one who takes that step and will be the one who kisses Twilight. I insist; it's part of her character arc, which is about gaining confidence in herself, becoming a woman, and feeling worthy of love.
At this point, she's on the verge of figuring out her own feelings and after that happens, she needs to accept them and then figure out how she wants to proceed. I believe it won't be an easy task for her. Knowing Yor, she won't want to inconvenience Loid and impose her feelings on him. She also won't want to risk what she already has: her family. So it will take a while and maybe a little encouragement (maybe from the Authens?) to get to the point of actually want to act on these feelings.
But it's coming.
806 notes ¡ View notes
janovavalen ¡ 10 months ago
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✧UNLOCKING MORE OF HER || percy jackson x fem!reader
part one!
part two!
part three!
part four!
part five!
summary: percy jackson’s first days on camp were hell to say the least—fist day and he got bullied, but when he sneaks away to be alone he finds an interesting girl in the forest.
word count: 3013!
warnings: small curses (literally like one word and it’s not really a curse but it’s considered one) reader is daughter of athena, sister of annabeth, horrid flirting, reader lowkey not felling percy for the first half’s of this story line.
a/n: guys, i def think im like dragging this out to be a slow burn to like don’t hate me HEHEHEHAHAHA
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when the day had just begun, percy was so nicely and beautifully woken up with his clothes being thrown into the wet mud by clarisse and her goons. they snickered as they threw us and made sure to twist their feet that laid upon them.
‘oh grate..yeah thanks for the painting on the shirt guys i’ll be sure to give you creds whenever someone asks where i got it’ percy pinter down at the first where his shirt laid that was once orange and was not poopoo brown.
clarisse seemed to be unhappy with the fact he wasn’t shaking in his boots and made her way over to him, shoving him into the mud right where his shirt was painted. grunting as he his the floor, percy looked up at the three of them.
‘dont think you're such a big deal just because you claimed you slayed the minotaur…i still don’t believe you did.’ she smirked down at him as percy kept his quiet, his eyes trained to look up at her.
sneaking she went to signal her followers to do more to his face—perhaps throw mud on it until they heard a stern voice speak behind them.
‘clarisse!’ she shouted.
percy pushed his led up with his arms that laid behind him in the mud, seeing it was y/n he felt the weight of the world set upon his shoulders. his face filled with red from the embarrassment that was unfolding. it just had to be her?
he wouldn’t mind criticism from grover or luke…or even annabeth? but y/n?
looking as she made eye contact with him, percy turned his head with embarrassment and she felt herself feeling a bit of pity for him. sighing with her eyes closed she folded her arms over her chest, her signature pose.
‘don’t you have places to be? other than pushing someone that’s not even your age into the mud to make yourself feel better at the fact nobody has paid attention to you since he git here? jealous are you?’ y/n looked clarisse up and down who scoffed and angrily as she bit the inside of her cheek.
‘let’s go.’ she demanded her goons who stood behind her. they shoved themselves past y/n who moved her shoulder before any of them could check her.
y/n turned to make sure they fully left them, she didn’t have the time to be pushed into the mud this morning unlike percy who shamefully laid down into the mud, accepting his fate.
y/n walked over to percy who looked up through his eyelashes and she looked down at him with only her eyes.
‘aren’t you going to get up? or are you going to sit there and look sad.’ she mumbled as percy looked around and scrambled his way up to eyes hight with y/n who stayed connected to his own.
‘i was going to get up…right when you walked in actually…’
she looked at his clothes as face before straightening her back and head. what percy didn’t expect was for her to reach out and rub the dry splatter of mud on his cheek that he failed to notice was there. his eyes followed her soft hand that rubbed at the hardened dirt. she looked at the rest of his face before humming to herself.
she didn’t say anything else to him, all she did was turn around and walk away from where percy stood. he was purely shocked, but nonetheless. he watched her walk away back to wherever she was really going.
that must have been a sign…it had to be a sign, today he would learn at least one thing about y/n.
ㆍ୨୧ㆍ
as percy swung his sword at luke who dodged and turned, percy grew to accept the fact that every time they dueled it was a never ending repeat of who will win and who will be shamefully walking away to their cabin.
if nobody could tell the one winning would obviously be luke…the one going back to his cabin, would be percy.
‘come on! you can do it—‘
‘no no i can’t!’ percy grunted as he dodged some of luke’s attacks, occasionally getting a good swing in on luke here and there.
‘yes you can! we’ve been doing this since you got here, come on!’ luke encouraged as he pushed his sword over percy’s. the two of them coming into contact as he twisted the sword making it look easy.
percy may get lucky just now? maybe it will finally happen—
‘luke!’ she called out.
percy immediately looked away from luke who saw this as an opportunity and swung his sword at percy making him stumble and fall.
landing right on his back, percy blinked in surprise as he exhaled.
‘oh!’ luke laughed. making his way over to percy who laid on the ground.
‘never take your eyes off of your opponent’ he mumbled to percy who rolled his eyes. luke laughed and pulled out his hand to help percy up who accepted the help and let out a small thanks.
just then he remembered who was actually there. his eyes turning to her immediately, y/n stood, looking at the two boys who looked at her waiting for her to speak.
‘uhm…sorry to interrupt your bonding, but luke your needed at cabin five. some teens are disagreeing and there’s a small fight bound to happen’ y/n warned luke who stood there and rolled his eyes at the immaturity shining though.
‘right…uhm—thanks for telling me n/n’ he placed his sword into its holder on his hip and started to walk but before he fully left he stumbled over to y/n, his hand on her shoulder.
‘oh and please y/n, take him to the bows and train him. i was supposed to but y’know…’ luke gave her a pleading look as she went to intervene but soon gave up when luke looked into her eyes for a bit longer.
percy watched the two of them, his eyes trained on luke’s hand that didn’t leave y/n’s shoulder. he felt his hand flatten against his jeans as he looked up and down at the two of them before clearing his throat.
y/n turned to luke who looked away into the distance as she sighed in defeat.
‘fine…but if this is a thing, i promise—‘
‘i’ll never see the light of day again. i know i know, you're the best!’ luke shouted as he hurried to cabin five.
percy looked at y/n who shook her head at luke.
she wore something more casual as of right now than he saw her in earlier. when he saw her last, she wore more loose pants and a sweatshirt. but now she wore washed out blue jean shorts and the casual orange camp shirt that said camp half blood on it.
her shoes were high top converse like his own, her hair in a half up half down like annabeth’s and her usual necklace full of earned beads to show off. clearing his throat once more in the awkwardness of him just looking at her, unbeknownst to percy, y/n did the same.
‘so—‘ just before he could say anything else she turned her heel and began walking. percy took this as a small sigh and hurried his walk to be right behind her.
‘uh-uhm, i just wanted to thank you for earlier, when you told clarisse and her goons off’ percy looked over at y/n who turned her head a bit to hid the small snicker that failed to be held within her—he succeeded at seeing another emotion from y/n other than serious, dark and mysterious.
‘yeah it’s whatever…don’t mention it’ she mumbled while they cut their way through small groups of people who stood and talked or groups of people who walked by.
‘yeah but i feel like i need to…and i still wanted to thank you for helping me out of the forest the other night? you never let me—‘
‘i’m serious…percy.’ she turned her face to him, her footsteps stopping as she turned her head to him. their eyes connecting, blue meeting (e/c) as she held their eye contact—‘don’t mention it’ y/n finished.
percy nodded his head as the two of them continued to walk their way to the bows and arrows.
ㆍ୨୧ㆍ
‘pick your bow, and get down arrows. get enough so that if and when you fail, you’ll have some to back it up’ y/n spoke boldly ad the two of them stood alone.
luke so happened to pick a day when most of the cabins would be doing other training other than bows and arrows. y/n and percy had the small place alone.
no others. just them alone. together.
‘i won’t fail—‘
‘they all say that’ she shrugged her shoulders as percy rolled his eyes and grabbed the arrows with his bow in hand.
once he got himself ready with the bow gripped in his hand and the arrow in his other.
y/n stood next to him, her figure not to far from his.
‘arms up’ she instructed. percy did just that. his eyes staying focused but his mindset focused on her—he didn’t know what it was but he found it a bit difficult to work properly and concentrate with her near him.
‘place the arrow on the bow and aim for the middle, if you can’t that’s fine, but i would be impressed if you ca make it into the middle’ she folded her arms over her chest like always as she waited for percy to shoot his shot at the red dot sitting on the target in front of him.
breathing out he looked to his backside where he was and mumbled—‘what if i can’t make it into the middle like you want?’ he asked. worried for her answer but ready for it.
she bit her lip a bit to make sure her answer was right. quaking up her eyebrows as she shrugged she began to speak—‘there are no what if’s…there are just doing. don't be worried about what others want from you. do what you want.’
she looked at him in his eyes as he looked down into the grass.
what could she possibly mean? how did that even answer his question…to be fair it answered some of it but not all of it. could her response be related to how she feels? could this be his opportunity to learn something about her?
‘okay…right’ he mumbled. she looked ahead while waiting for him to take his shot. percy prepared himself before pulling back his arms and shooting the arrow.
it flew into the air…it flew straight. could he get it? could this be his moment to empress y/n?
watching anxiously as time seem to slow he watched his arrow go straight, straight and soon straight into the dirt that laid behind the standing target.
‘hm…’ y/n mumbled making percy turn to her.
‘i almost had that! it must be the wind—‘
‘there is no wind today…it’s perfectly sunny, no clouds’ y/n looked up at the sky, prompting percy to do the same who of course did as he saw she was right. not a cloud in sight.
‘i—i wasn’t ready’
‘there’s more arrows…make yourself ready. there might come a time where your put up to something and you need to be ready’ she told him.
percy frowned his eyebrows once more and looked at her as he let his arms drop to his side—‘okay, what is up with you and these instagram superhero quotes or something? why do you keep telling me these things?’
‘telling you what things?’ she tilted her head a bit while looking at percy who scoffed.
‘might come a time, need to be ready?there are no what if’s—who says that?’
‘…me?’ she frowned, her eyes bows.
‘obviously you but why? why do you keep telling me these things?’ percy waited for a answer as he was only met with a small smile from y/n.
she walked her way over to him and fixed the beads on his necklace that laid atop his shirt.
‘your beads are in the wrong order…ones chipped?’ she changed the subject, of course. but she was talking, and that’s all the mattered in the moment.
‘i fell—‘
‘you were pushed?’
‘same thing.’ percy mumbled. y/n scoffed a bit while patting his heads over his neck.
‘you can get a new one y’know? if you're not happy with that one’ she looked him in the eyes before he nervously looked away and back at her.
‘i’m okay with it, it’s not like they’re gold or something’ y/n blinked at his response and hummed.
percy couldn’t help but look down at her own beads and saw the fact she had plenty…probably more than annabeth and luke. she had one that looked rare, the rest like the others. her and her shared at least two of them. he still had some time to go.
‘i tell you these things because somebody wasn’t there to tell me…we’re the same age i know, but that doesn't mean anything. i can still tell people things i wished were told to me’ she mumbled.
percy felt his eyes soften at her words and his hands loosen around the arrow that was once tight in his hand.
she wished someone told her the things he’d been telling here? could they be more similar in ways he didn’t know? just then it hit him. he learned something small about y/n. one down plenty to go.
‘wait—weren’t you supposed to train me today? i don’t think i’m well with an arrow yet, and i hear you're pretty good?’ percy tried to make y/n stay after seeing she tried to make her leave.
y/n had her back turned before she turned his way and looked him up and down—‘i couldn’t stay for long, i have others to train…i’ll train you tomorrow morning, i’ll tell luke he can have you in the evening. you better be ready, i don’t go easy’ she told while turning away from percy who stood his spot in the middle of the grass.
she wanted to see him tomorrow.
well…not like that. it’s for training but she didn’t have to offer it, but she did. so? this could mean something.
ㆍ୨୧ㆍ
‘it has to mean something right?’ percy stressed to grover who groaned while he threw his head back into the bed.
percy’s thoughts raced over and over, could she want to see him? did she want to see him? did she possibly want to know about him just as much as he felt the need to know about her? was this a prank? because if so it wasn’t funny.
after percy had found himself useless in forgetting about it at lunch he rushed us way to grover who had happened to be in his cabin resting. reading a book, with his pajamas on. his day was peaceful until percy threw himself into his cabin like a mad man.
he had been talking to grover about y/n for the past thirty minutes now, non stop.
‘i don’t know…maybe?’
‘but what if it doesn’t mean anything and she’s truly just trying to be a good friend right? wait….do you think she thinks of me as a friend?’ percy had a whole new possibility pop into his head.
‘maybe?’ grover mumbled while holding his head in his hands.
‘maybe? grover! maybe isn’t a answer right now, i really need your help and expertise! you know her right? your like twenty something so you definitely know her, how did she become your friend? how long did it take?’
‘like…two years? i don’t know, she’s reserved and very secretive, very stealthy too’
‘i know, it’s almost like she’s always around without me knowing which is kind of cool and kind of scary’ grover smiled and nodded at this before percy once more continued his speech.
‘but you didn’t answer my other question? how did she become your friend?’
grover wittingly looked up into the ceiling before letting out a breath as he thought.
‘uhm…i don’t know? i just…one day i guess she called me g for the first time as my nickname then after that she started to talks to me a lot more and joke with me?’
‘so, she didn’t really have a way to become your friend she just did?’
‘yeah i guess?’ grover shrugged as percy threw his head back into the bed, his hands over his eyes.
‘this isn’t helping at all grover!’ he whined into his hands as grover laughed and shrugged once more.
‘dude i don’t know im sorry! did you talk to luke?’
‘of course i did, he basically said the same things you're saying…’ percy sat up with a helpless look on his face.
grover felt himself feeling a bit bad and being unhelpful to percy and helping him understand probably one of the most hardest things to understand which was y/n.
grover let an idea pop into his head—
‘listen…she likes (f/f) and (f/c) try like…showing it off as you eat it at breakfast tomorrow and wear your one (f/c) jacket tomorrow, that might get a bit of her attention.’ grover explained while percy nodded.
‘—and if it doesn’t talk to her as you guys train, talk about new york, she’s always wanted to go. talk about anything that she might like…try to make tomorrow about her and maybe you might get five steps into her three hundred doors of being officially her friend’
grover explained slowly and lowly to percy who absorbed everything that he was being told. remembering everything he nodded his what and smiled a bit at grover.
‘thanks grove’ you really do help when you want’ percy teased him as he rolled his eyes—‘i help all the time don’t act like i don’t’ percy laughed making grover do the same.
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shinjiikar1 ¡ 1 month ago
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I've been trying to think about what I want to say about these first two episodes of Love in the Big City. I'm watching it slowly, it's a show that makes me want to sit rather than rush ahead, and it also hits a little too close to home to enjoy freely (I've only watched the first two episodes so far and my knowledge of the rest of the story is fairly vague so bear with me).
Go Young experiences two major losses. The parallels between these losses, what could have been vs. what can never be again was what particularly stood out to me.
Mi Ae represents a beautiful time that is forever lost. After she gets married, there's no one he can be fully himself with. He simply doesn't have another relationship on that level, platonic or otherwise, and that's truly such an isolating experience. Who do you call when you're in trouble? Who do you complain to? Who will always be your first port of call?
Often, youthful friendships are particularly intense, you're at a point where the world feels so enormous but you don't quite know what to do with it, or yourself yet. Everything still feels new and exciting. You meet people who understand you in ways you've never been understood and can't imagine it won't last forever.
And then you experience that loss for the first time.
Kim Nam Gyu experiences it too. It's clear early in their relationship that Go Young is overwhelmed and uncomfortable with the intensity of Nam Gyu's feelings (his expressions during the padlock and ring scenes in particular). He feels suffocated and anxious, he's not ready for it. So, rather harshly (at least the first time) he ends things. I've been on both ends, which makes it a lot easier to empathize with both of them. While I feel for Nam Gyu incredibly (especially as I read him as very neurodivergent), that discomfort is not something easily resolved, and it's only made worse by his inability to move on. But how can he when he also has no one else?
In the end, Go Young mentions that he missed out on what could have been a long and lasting love with Nam Gyu but I wonder if that's true. Would he have eventually opened up and reciprocated that intensity? Or would he have continued to wallow in his discomfort and let that resentment pile up even further? It's hard to say, but based on the way he behaves, I think the latter. He just wasn't in a stage of life to accept it yet, without the experiences he has with Mi Ae, and without Nam Gyu's death, would he have made it to that point before it became too much? He says he didn't really believe love was possible for someone like him, it took him a lot to get to the point where he even starts to believe it; I find it hard to imagine that he could've gotten there purely through a relationship with Nam Gyu at that stage, as sad as that might be.
Mi Ae offers a bit of an interesting foil here. She chooses loss, but the loss of her authentic self. She chooses the safe option, a stable relationship and job, pleasing her parents, following societal expectations. Maybe the guy isn't quite right, but in the end what seems most important to her is that security, and she's willing to take a loss to get it. As others in the tags have pointed out, Go Young doesn't have that option. There is no option that will (mostly) guarantee him security and safety that would even be remotely tolerable and grant him any degree of happiness. Perhaps he could have chosen to lose parts of himself to be with Nam Gyu, but that wouldn't have provided him the type of security Mi Ae enjoys. If something went wrong and it didn't work out, he could stand to lose even more.
I think that's something that a lot of cishet people fail to understand, and part of what these episodes have done so well for me. Really underlining how the queer experience differs and how isolating it can be (which I think is reflected in Nam Gyu as well).
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