#like in about 40 minutes maybe
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if i just told you i love you would this world change
#witch hat tag#orufrey#these kinda suck lol i feel like i cant draw right now *irritated sigh* BUT I FEEL EMOTIONS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#if you are gay go watch good omens season 2 right now. NO YOU DONT KNOW THO!!!!!!!!!#i know being this affected by good omens is probably cringe. I dont care any more. the last 1 minute of good omens season 2 was#some of the most affecting acting i've ever seen in my life. sometimes someone acts with the force as if their entire career led to that#like during the credits part the very end im not even talking about before that. holy god#aziraphale i know everything about you. i know what you are feeling right now. i can see everything on your face. we're going to make it#ER.... NOT THAT THIS HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS POST. IT'S NOT SPOILERS !!!!!!!!!!!!!#I JUST FEEL THOROUGHLY CHANGED !!!!!!!!!!! SHIT GETS REAL FROM NOW ON.. LIKE IN GENERAL! IN MY LIFE!#tormented gay love tormented gay love TORMENTED GAY LOVE TORMENTED GAY LOVE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#btw the first 3 images were drawn earlier with an entirely different feeling and an entirely different mood.#Why do you keep pulling away from me?#It is because i love you that i do this#the lyrics from one of my japanese orufrey songs (A SONG THAT THE CREATOR LISTENS TO!!!!) led to feelings#“あなたが知らない私を残さず見ててほしいの” but i'm not translating it cause it just sounds weird. if with his eyes oru's asking “WHY don't you want#to let me in? to see all of you?“ those lyrics are like ”I actually want you to see every last bit of the parts of me you don't know“#oru you have no idea how much i want to lay bare my whole soul for you#maybe it's an alternate version of chapter 40. to me#i need to draw something really fucking good or i'm not going to forgive myself. i will not rest in this life#until i have made the orufrey that fully satisfies me nor until i have seen what the manga is leading to#NO STORY MEANS ANYTHING WITHOUT TORMENTED GAY LOVE AT THE HEART OF IT. THATS THE HEART OF THIS WORLD!!!!!#........... so Hi im normal :) haha *goes and finally makes breakfast*
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A Biltmore Christmas may be the first Hallmark movie to drive me to fanfic.
#hallmark#a biltmore christmas#time travel#WHERE IS MY POST-CREDITS SCENE SHOWING HOW MARGARET REACTS???#she was one of the best parts of the movie!#you need at least five minutes of her screaming for joy!#also clearly there was a conspiracy of people in the past who knew about the time travel thing so how did that work?#what about that bearded guy on the crew who was CLEARLY another time traveler?#(there is no way that facial hair came from 1947)#also where does the relationship go from there?#how do you adjust?#does tour guide riker help out?#so many unanswered questions can fit into the last scenes of that film and i need answers#also just overall: thanks to people who said this one was worth seeking out because my goodness what a delight#that movie oozed charm#i think maybe my true core fictional love is classic '30s/'40s film because i was digging that vibe#the banter! the patter! the zingers! the perfect blend of cynicism and sentimentality#some of the background stuff was too modern but also some was spot on#that guy who played claude looks like he was born to be a classic Hollywood film star#the leading lady did not fit the vibe at all but she had great chemistry with the movie's leads so i can see why they cast her#the old-timey writer dude was charming#the main lady might be a new favorite hallmark actress (there's only one other on the list)#(watched part of a different film with her in it and she seems to put some of that classic hollywood sass into her roles)#i wasn't sold on the male lead at first but the writing came through for him#when he sits in the chair behind her! when he's trying to guess her personality traits?#charming and absolutely spot-on for the vibe#(the fact that they cast hallmark regulars in the remake is hilarious and also sad because it looks so much worse than the original)#anyway great time had a blast will definitely be rewatching
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i was kind of afraid I would be a mean drunk but it seems like it just makes me unmask like I just tell more stupid jokes and info dump
#granted. i dont think i got drunk *enough* to tell bc i still remember it#but i have a pretty good guess maybe?#shout out to my sister for listening to me yap about Ponyo theories for like 40 minutes
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Cause Everybody Knows, He’s A Femme Fatale.
#femme fatale Jonathan is ✨babygirl✨#this is their 6 pm date at the ritz where his sad boy charms combined with flirty shit he learned from his now dead lover (who he killed)#woe Nancy and makes her fall for him more#and yes he did walk in like that he’s a femme fatale he can do that#it’s the slutty slutty tuxedo o was talking about (took me a few minutes to figure how to make it that way but obviously I did)#*I#it’s slutty by standards of the 30s and 40s (he gave the finger to tux etiquette)#I would like to thank my beloved mutual Dearie (@musicalchaos07) for reblgging a post about the dynamic of a man who is a femme fatale#and a lady who is a film noir detective and putting jancy in the tags#this masterpiece would not exist without it so thanks again!#description is the chorus from femme fatale by The Velvet Underground (just changed her to him)#maybe I’ll draw all the characters in this au for my historical au week 👀#stranger things#jonathan byers#nancy wheeler#jancy#film noir jancy au#sketch saturday
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g*lmar rly has to be the best skajrim character on the real like even if you don't like him he just is . literally The best one i think......... on dat note i also imagine that he and ulfr*c despite being fairydust BFFs for lyfe genuinely have the worst communication skills ever seen
#text#but i already talked about how g*lmar is weird about ulfr*c anyways#literally jubilant and feeling special cus he's the only person ulfr*c actually trusts and speaks to outside of formal conversations#he's a very manly man too (like N*loth) for wanting to just control everything... well actually having ulfr*c under 'control' is enough 4 -#- him. unlike n*loth who wants to be above everything that moves. literally not about him tho#i hope that other st*rmcloaks develop a habit of going to hide downstairs in the palace whenever they can tell the vibe between -#- g*lmar and ulfr*c is off because they're gonna be yelling at each other and throwing shit around for 40 minutes in a few seconds#i don't believe they'd fight insanely often but being at an active war probably gets them heated more. Often than usual; and their -#- conflicts are never resolved. i feel like they just don't talk to each other for a good 2 days and act like nothing happened#they're way too manly and prideful to actually let the other one 'win' so they just don't say anything ever post-arguing#Tbhs g*lmar actually really likes that ulfr*c is so unstable and harrowed because it makes himself feel very good and reliable -#- but he has his limits 😂LMFAOO i bet sometimes he gets really tired of him being so traumatized. very rarely but he does think about it#i'll have to desribe that a bit better later tho... don't know how to word it atm#but maybe he wants to punch him or something BYE. no...... 💔savage as hell#he likes it in a very general sense of ulfr*c's personality especially between them but doesn't like it when it causes them to clash#this might just be mostly ulfr*c's doing cus i doubt he's actually talkative about his past issues and Troubles (torture mayhem) and -#- can't communicate anything about it or set boundaries when needed. he just gets mad or very avoidant. No fixing that tho#well it's just shameful to him so he'd rather do nothing than even admit anything to anyone Everrrrr#why does his life suck so bad LMFAOOOOOOOOO#their nasty musty mutualism .. leeching off your traumatized Bff so that he can make you feel good by saying he needs you in particular#while U pay him back with some support.......SOME#Oh well#that zero communication between some sk*rim characters looks yammy as fuck to me. A;lways. ALWAYS#nelvas is power dynamic induced...... g*lmar&&ulfr*c trauma-caused... elituli Um😂 t*llius doesn't even know any hobbies she has#bye this is why they're serving so hard
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I think my fieldwork is going to be a lot easier than my last location in many ways, but that it's going to be a misery of my own design.
For example, I get to work from home Fridays, but I have spent all of Friday not working and have a bunch of stuff due and minimum hours to meet every week.
#my instructor was like 'careful not to put too much time into this location. 40 hours a week should be fine'#meanwhile i'm worried about getting 32 hours to meet minimums because i'm irresponsible#i have maybe spent 40 minutes of today on fieldwork#the executive dysfunction/anxiety should get overridden soon for me to finish the bare minimum#but that still ain't gonna be an 8 hour day
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So there was an attempt.
Will post the transcript of it here eventually, for those curious about my thoughts but prefer text over video and/or dislike my voice (can't blame you, especially with the bad audio quality)
#Fairly Oddparents#Fairly Oddparents a New Wish#fop anw#Flor talks#I guess ???#was supposed to post it earlier that week but something unexpected (in a good way) came up irl#on that note I hope it's not too late to promote the show on neflix...#(I say despite having no subscribers meaning I'll be lucky if this vid gets more than 100 views)#(tbh if it gets 1k views in like a month or two I'll consider it a success; even then it feels like way too high an expectation)#I love how I thought this would end up being 30-40 minutes long#why am I surprised at that point I've seen the lenght of my posts#on that note; if you thought I was annoying before this is about to get worse#I have the power of video editing now#granted it needs some work#btw I have NO idea why the background is so low quality#it's the same 'base' pic as my channel header and it looks fine there#maybe it's a size thing ? 🤔
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i really cant say shit about music tastes considering im regularly subjected to my own, but for the love of fuck if a blorbo is based in a music subculture, plsssssss take an afternoon to tour that subculture at least a little when making your blorbo playlists trust me i promise you theres good shit out there beyond what little from fringe genres that filters out into the top 40s from the last decade
#mochi rambles#yes this is about ashton lmao#every time i see a playlist tagged for them i get excited about maybe finding something fun and new#and every time i am disappointed because its all top 40s stuff#and like yes i like a lot of that music too there's a reason its the top 40s#but also finding blorbo music that you vibe with in their cannon genre is so much fun???#like i already knew a ton of punk music because ive listened to punk music for 20 years#but man did u know theres a whole subset of pubk music that is just queer punk#and TRANS punk???#and there is SO MUCH of it????#i didnt until last year and let me tell you i am better for it#and i got really into witch house and synthwave for a hot minute because that is just Essek in my head#but i stg if i never saw tswift bastille or hozier on a fan playlist ever again itd be too soon#pls there are more than four songs to choose from
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WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE WORD "ASBEL" SHOWS UP IN MY OUTLINE DOC 1,840 TIMES?????????
#2hcb1#wips#it's almost like he's the main character or something 😅#but like. jesus. that's 2% of the total word count on that one#funnily enough my second word doc w more of the actual fic in it also averages out to be 2% asbel. bro is secretly milk 🥛#2% isnt a lot really but im mostly just imagining saying the word 'asbel' aloud 1840 times in a row. how long would that even take.#ok i tested it it's about 9 min 40 sec at 180 words per minute 😂 but it's only *2* minutes at 900 wpm what a steal!#*presses play* ASBLASBLASBLASBLASBLASBLASBLASBLASBLASBLASBLASBLASBLASBLASBLASBL#maybe i should count how often his name comes up in the game so i can feel better about myself?#actually i take that back my fic probably uses it more bc that's how prose works#the game can just show him doing stuff i have to specify w words who is doing what#maybe if you counted every time his name shows up in his own dialogue bubble tag. that's akin to 'asbel said' in fiction right?#i am. rambling. it is. late. goodby
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Guys I’m so sad. I didn’t even get half way through my coffee before I had to leave my house for the bus </3 it’s times like these that I wish I could drive </3333
#⁂ chef evaluation#✧⁑ cookie cutter#it’s not that serious lol I’m just being dramatic…as usual#maybe if I had gotten up earlier I would’ve been able to finish it#I do in fact sleep for like 30 more minutes after my alarm goes off#no I will not stop doing that#yes I will continue to complain about how early I have to get up#WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND ENJOYS GETTING UP AT 5:40????#CERTAINLY NOT ME.#okay ramble over gonna try and read something before class lol#maybe rot…or try again. probably try again.#not to worry though! rot I’m coming for you soon be ready
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hi it’s my birthday tomorrow
#had to redo this since someone left a comment that bummed me out a lot#well… didn’t HAVE to but I didn’t like seeing the notification#guess I could have just deleted their comment… shit… didn’t think about that#hey uhhhh please don’t be mean to me about my birthday. I’m just a sad lil guy 🥺#I already dislike my birthday. I hate feeling older. like I’m wasting my life.#it’s already usually an afterthought since it’s Christmas Eve#but with my mom’s surgery it’s even more of an afterthought and I’m so stressed and I have to take care of my bros and I’m just not great 😬#like… what do I even want to do tomorrow?#I’d love to just sleep in and eat junk and maybe go see a movie#but I have to go drive 40 minutes to see my mom and if I try to cut the visit short I’ll just feel guilty#so… I guess I’m spending my birthday watching my mom shake and cry in pain 🤷🏻♂️#which can be okay! I mean not okay but I can 100%… well… 85% live with that. it’s okay. it’s just a day.#but fuck does it hurt when people just ignore it or downplay it or make jokes about my birthday this year#people don’t have to care about my birthday. strangers online don’t have to care. it’s whatever.#and I’m not even mad at anyone in particular. I just… yeah.. I just can’t take negative jokes about it right now.#I’m trying not to be specific! I don’t want to be mean! nobody is being mean to me! it’s okay!#im just a sensitive baby that just wants people to be nice to him for the next 24 hours#…. I’m sad!#I think I’ll just be mean to everyone tomorrow#…. lol like I could do that. pfffttt I’ll bend over backwards for my family and I’ll be glad to do it. mostly.#it’ll be okay#days are 24 hours. I’m sure I can squeeze some good stuff in between the bad. that’s life babyyyy#and I love you and I appreciate you to no one in particular and I’m sorry I’m so sensitive#my mutuals are great#you’re all great. unless you aren’t. but we won’t talk about that.#ok you can ignore this#text
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going to the V&A on a day when taylor swift is performing: MISTAKE
#the logic was that 'oh its a monday so itll be quieter than the weekend. most families wont arrive till later too!'#i forgor about the swifties#also did not realise just how spread across the museum the trail is#everywhere i went. a queue#shout out to the staff tho that were very helpful to me navigating through spaces#bc god knows the access points were not left clear#anyway. was worth it nonetheless#nyxtalks#i mean. maybe its just been like that the entire time the trail is up. or at least for the last week or so. i can only speak on today#it was bad#ngl friends. even if she was my most specialest artist in the world i would not queue up 40+ minutes per exhibit for that#ppl were getting like. 5 seconds and then shuffled on. at like 14 stops.#i probably got almost as good of a look just trying to get past the other way#nightmareeeeeee
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Less than an hour before the mcelroy selfie & signing
I'm a little nervous
#speculation nation#havent had any caffeine bc ive been having too much of that lately. and it's a shorter day.#so im a bit sleepy. but at least the active nausea is better than it was a bit ago#(waking up so early several days in a row And having them be such physically strenuous days is. hard on the body.)#anyways. yeah. the mcelroys.#i mean ultimately theyre just some guys. but im not good at talking with strangers Anyways#and ive enjoyed their stuff for a good bit now. so. it's intimidating.#but i know theyre nice people. and ultimately all i Really need to do is give them what i want signed and take the pic#but there is opportunity for brief conversation. and i want to try asking them if they remember an anecdote from when my sister saw them#it was a good bit ago so i'll preface it with 'this might be a bit of a longshot but'#the anecdote being that when my sister asked for an autograph for 'Fanny' Clint started writing 'Best Fanny'#before travis was like 'uhhh maybe add a comma there' hfkshfkd#ultimately it WAS such a small moment. and actually thinking about it i dont know if i want to ask them actually.#bc if they Dont remember. which they likely dont. well then that's awkward for all of us.#...but also even if they dont remember it's still a funny story.#and if they Do somehow remember i can be like 'Hello i am that Fanny'#the thing is that theyre people with good humor. so i dont think theyd be upset at me asking.#and maybe theyd even find it funny. even if they dont remember.#i can give no guarantees that i will even try to do this bc i might end up so petrified in the moment that i cannot do it#but i will try my best. aughhgjhg i wish i wasnt passively nausous rn!!! not making it easier!!!#and somehow it's now 40 minutes away AAAAAAAAAAAGH
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Hyperfixating on your own writing can be so funny because while you neglect everything else (like being active on tumblr, I'm sorry!) you find yourself in some kind of trance and when you emerge from said trance for a moment of clarity you find yourself 211 pages and 34402 words into the story.
Huh...
#if you find the page/word count ratio strange it's because it's a script#it means it's about 211 minutes long (1 page = 1 minute)#it's also episodic#maybe the pacing is shitty but I don't really care about that at the moment#but I managed to make each 'episode' 40-45 pages long! like a real TV episode script! I'm so proud of myself#úúúúúúúúúú!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't wait to finish it so I can show you guys!!!!#y'all are not ready for the amount of angst that's already in the story#even I wasn't ready for that!#(also pls marvel do something like this you'll get [even] rich[er than you are right now] I promise)
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about to project all my beef with hyper christian southern small towns onto cowboy anakin
#im talking meth heads im talking as many booze stores as there are churches im talking falling asleep to the sounds of coyotes#he is me i am him#<-#dont ask me about that when you read it#my period’s over now so i feel alive again#im talking falling asleep in church and never rlly feeling like you woke up#im talking being torn between giving into a fake version of you and leaving to start fresh#because its what you know and if everyone believes the same thing maybe youll feel like you fit in if you do too#every day being the same the trees get swept up by tornados and then they grow back#im talking being stuck but maybe its better to say god gave you a purpose so you follow that#despite the growing resentment#grasshoppers and washed up high school football players#this probably wont translate in the fic but itll be there#sweat and always feeling like its sunset HUMID AS HELL#there used to be an active crackhouse right across the street from the elementary school#i dont think its active anymore but#also a gun store across from a walmart#(in the town 40 minutes away)#📜.scrolls
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My brain is. Absolutely buzzing with fic ideas right now and last night I started on a new one because I felt like i had to at least get the premise down before I lost it, but now I'm nearly 6k words in and oh no I don't have time to get another longfic wip going.... I'm 140k words deep into two other longfics right now 😭 I want to get into it, but I have too many stories fighting for attention in my head and this won't end well if I hop between them all bc I want to finish something for once. Ahhhh!!! Darn you limited time.
#It's about to get so much more limited because I'm starting 6 day a week FFXIV prog on Monday#technically I started last night (so I was up until 11:30pm writing the first 2k words of this...) but we have today off bc I have a concer#and like. getting off work at 3:30 if i then have 3 hours of prog. an hour to make dinner. 30-40 minutes to walk/run/exercise#that's not enough time to get out many words of fic. not if i want to do other enjoyable things with my life#so my productivity is going to tank.#so far my daily average wordcount for may has been over 3k which is insane. but i haven't had raid in ffxiv this so far this month#so that means a lot more time to write. as in 3 more hours per night to write. not that i usually write for 3hrs#but still. you get the gist of it. it's also 3 hours i'm not sitting at my computer so it's easier on the body to sit at the comp and write#anyway for anyone who is reading these tags for a mysterious reason. 1) hi. 2) this is. you probably guessed it. a dmc fic#this one is based on the vergil time travel idea that spaceacerat proposed. there are so many ways it could go but-#-this is one that would take place right before sparda leaves so sparda is still there and vergil has to convince him not to go#the thing there is i'm not really sure how it would end...in my other time travel fic i DO have an explanation for how sparda died#but i developed it specifically for that fic and it would not work for a happy ending in this fic. which i'd like to have#that fic also takes place after sparda's gone so. y'know.#but yeah i...as i'm writing this i now have somewhat of an idea for an ending but it's. bittersweet? maybe? hmmm#but yeah! never underestimate my love for time travel fics it's my favorite trope of all time. has been since i met trunks dbz as a kid.#erurandomness#erubabbles
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