#the thing is that theyre people with good humor. so i dont think theyd be upset at me asking.

[orcelito]

Less than an hour before the mcelroy selfie & signing

I'm a little nervous

[oryoucouldhavemine]

TOH Headcanon Dump Post

(Mostly the De-lights because i write them the most lmao)

Hunter:

Autistic

surprisingly tall but like in a lanky "towers over everyone" way except he has terrible posture

gets overwhelmed with sound, light, people, basically everything if it was unexpected he's probably overwhelmed

Darius is his dad but Raine and Eberwolf are like, honorary parents at this time. Eda and Camila are more like the really close aunts he always visits to me, idk i dont see Eda being a parental figure that works for him (Luz however that is her daughter fr fr)

has lots of scars from Belos trying to "teach him a lesson" about bravery and such and Hunter doesnt think anything about it until hes like changing and Darius does a drama queen dramamgic gasp, hand over chest while leaning against a wall for support

HATES tight clothing, its too restricting he enjoys oversized and loose clothes. in the human world, luz introduces him to skirts and hunter is like "WHY WOULD ANYONE NOT WEAR A SKIRT THEYRE AMAZING"

he also likes purses he thinks theyve gotta be magical or something

touch-starved but has loving friends and family who are here to help him through it

discovers fire trucks and engines in the human world and despises the boiling isles for NOT HAVING THEN WHY DONT THEY HAVE THEM THEYRE SO COOL????

Luz

ADHD + genderqueer (p sure both are canon)

SHE WOULD LOVE NEO/XENO PRONOUNS theyd have sm fun with chosing ones

Loves to dress masc and fem and soemtimes combine them in asburd ways but she always surprisingly makes the outfit work

wants a guinea pig farm. no, NEEDS a guinea pig farm. She wants to name them all after her favourite book characters and sew them tiny outfits to match she would KILL a man for a guinea pig farm

considera hunter her older brother and looks up to him a lot

LOVES her gf would also kill a man for her she is the light of her life. luz tries to do grand romantic cheesy gestures like writing amity poems or getting her a massive bouquet of flowers but something ALWAYS goes wrong (amity loves all the gestures regardless)

luz's favourite colour is purple (because of amity ofc)

she HAS to sleep either sprawled out taking up every inch of the bed possible or curled up and swadled like a little baby there is no inbetween

very tactile if luz isnt hugging someone there might me something wrong

im cutting this short i could make fifty posts about luz hcs alone

Amity

autistic + sapphic

npw that shes free from her mom, she LOVES to be imperfect, she gets happy whenever she fails a test or a spell because shes ALOWED to be imperfect now

she and hunter did NOT get along at first like even post-s3 they didnt mesh well but they both care for Luz they had to get over it (and now theyre practically ever apart)

admired lillith even more now, she thinks lillith is like, THE COOLEST person in the world but feels akward telling her

has poor circulation so she gets cold really easily

whenever shes stressed or worried, shell pull at two strands of her hair next to her face and like twirl or pull on them to ground herself

Gus

unlabelled he/they

brags about having gone to the human realm to anyone who will listen

considers himself an expert on human things despite barely actually knowing anything human

loves playing pranks but is literally terrible at them but everyone humors him and acts surprised (he knows theyre acting)

once took a human SAT just to see if he could and got a higher score than Camila got on hers and she calls him Boy Genius for it

like in Flyer Derby, hes really good at a lot of sports but he plays untraditionally. hes always underestimated by the other team but then ends up scoring all the winning points

hes a silly little guy love him

Willow

her comfort person is hunter, she feels strong all the time but it weighs on her and hunter makes her feel strong even at her weakest moments

she likes to knot and crochet! she picked it up in the human world and she finds it so calming and fun except it took her a bit before she actually got the hang of it (she made like five sweaters that had three arms but in her defense!!! she knows a lot of creatures and beings with three arms!!!)

works out! not necessarily to get strong but because working out makes her feel accomplished

amity has been trying out new hairstyles and Willow loves being Amity's pracitce head. You can barely ever find willow without some sort of fancy braid or bun hairstyle nowadays

she wants a horse. shes not actually sure what a horse IS but she wants one

super sweet to every new person she meets until they mess with her friends then she is the scariest person alive

Darius

OCD + gay

he discovers what drag queens are and becomes obsessed

"a place for everything and everything in its place" hehas harsh rules about what does where and gets easily upset if his system is ruined

he DESPISES "if you hate messes so much whyd you pick the messiest magic to learn" comments because how DARE you insinuate that abomination matter (PART OF WHAT HE IS!) is ANYTHING like mud its actually very disrespectful of you to think so he says

he and alador had a falling out in their later years of school and to cover up the hurt, darius will argue and tease him but deep down he really just misses him

at the start of him trying to care for hunter, he refuses to admit that he is like a father to him. anytime eda or raine call him a dad, he'll go out of his way to try and prove hes NOT (cut to five months layer when hes legally adopted hunter and they meecilessly tesse him)

acts like eberwolf is the biggest inconvience hes ever met but would kill anyone who tries to harm them (and hed rather die than tell them that)

does things in threes, he doesnt even notice he does it at this point but he'll like rub his hands together three times, tie his hair up with three twists, eat three waffles for breakfast, and when smth isnt in threes it feels verry OFF to him

Alador

queer + autistic

very fixated on his work, he needs to be constantly creating and if he isnt creating then hes falling behind and if hes falling behind its the end of the world

doesnt know how to properly show affection, his parents had been pretty strict and neglectful so he doesnt know how to properly show his kids that he loves and cares for them

NOT a tactile person at all. don't touch him and DEFINTELY dont touch him without permission. he has very few people who are exceptions (his kids and Darius) and even then there are limits

hates the feeling of showering so hes a bigger bath person despite darius telling him thats not an effective way to get clean

he has like eighty pairs of the exact same outfit because its the only texture he can stand

darius and his falling out was due to his parents telling him darius was dragging him down and he itched him in an attempt to make his parents proud. he deeply regrets his choice everyday (they fix their shit eventually)

he DOES have a favourite kid but he refuses to tell them such

Edric

bisexual + autistic + transmasc

this man gets NO BITCHES none zero trying to find a partner is borderline IMPOSSIBLE for some unknown reason

he runs on a schedule and if something breaks the schedule no matter how small it can ruin his whole day

vrry open with his emotions. he will tell you right away if youre bothering him or did something to upset him

WHY THE HELL IS SCHOOL SO HARD he despises english because why are all answers right and wrong he loves math because there is only one right answer but its still a tricky subject for him

dinosaurs

his biggest fear is dying alone he hates being alone its the worst thing ever

WHY IS MAGIC TRICKY AS WELL WHY IS EVERYTHING SO HARD? hes getting better though and hes really good at beastkeeping

clingy emotionally and physically he needs the constant reassurance that people are there and care for him and hes close to his sister and tends to stick to her like glue

Emira

bisexual + AuDHD + transfem

when she and edric were younger and realised they were both trans they just switched names and clothes and it took ten years for their parents to notice the switch

RSD [Rejection Senstive Dysphoria] she hates that she has it because someone can say smth as simple as "sorry i cant make it my grandma died" and she'll start thinking of a million different reasons why that person actually just hates her (shes communicated this with her siblings though and they do their best to commincate clearly back with her that no they dont hate her at all)

SO MANY BITCHES people fall at her feet they swoon when she walks by but NONE of them are her type its terrible!!!!

loves her little sister but doesnt know how to show her love through any other way outside merciless teasing

she loves her brother, she does, she just wants to be her own person outside him, to be able to turn around and not see him two feet behind her

loves english and the fact you can make any wrong answer right with enough arguing and debate. math is her least favourite subject WHY THE HELL IS IT SO HARD

has years of detention stacked up but has not attended a single day (she got suspended for a week because of it and was just like YAYYY FREE VACATION!)

will sometimes just sit in her dads workshop while he works and watch in silence because she likes hanging out with people but knows alador cant focus with sound. its both of their favourite times

Raine

lesbian + nonbinary

post-s3 runs a music therapy group where they teach people how to play instruments or how listening to music can greatly help their mental health

has been in love with eda since their breakup, they never stopped loving her and would watch from the sidelines with terror as wanted signs got hung up around the BI for years

doesnt mind dressing fem or masc but prefers the more androgynous outfits

has watched hunter from the sidelines and tried to protect them from a distance but could only do so much. post-HM raine goes out of their way to make sure hunter is safe

sees luz as a sort of step daughter and then promptly panics over that realisation for a whole day

gets flustered really easily like why is everything so embarrassing what the hell

very agile, can do backflips and stuff

Eberwolf

Unlabelled + he/they

COULD JOT STAND DARIUS AT FIRST darius and eber did NOT get along in their early years of being covenheads but then eventually learned they were both rebels and got closer now theyre kind of like begruding brothers

could kill a man in their sleep and has

loves being dirty, mud is so much fun why doesnt everyone roll around in the mud more?

has also watched hunter from afar for years, hunter used to be sent out on overnight missions into the woods and stuff and eber would follow along and protect hunter so he could focus on his mission and not random forest creatures trying to kill him

Most of these are based on my dadrius series and stuff so if you enjoyed these hcs uou should go read my fics (KaztielCS118 on ao3!!! used to be Im_Basically_Shakespeare but i changed it recently)

[turbotasthick]

✨Why Noface x bm is so sexy as a couple✨

(i am cringe, but i am free)

( Just an FYI: i know im silly, and i know very well this is a fictional character im doing this solely for fun and for the stupids 🥰 i dont care if its "cringe" or "stupid" i am free, mother fuckers.)

ANYWAYS.

Lets start with her backstory. Noface is an experiment conducted by the creator to be a weapon for the government. All her life shes only known how to fight, shapeshift, train, and FEED (FLESH). all her life shes been under the cruel guide under the creator until she gain her own thinking, and senses and became feral, insane. a monster set out loose into the world and the creator forgetting about her at some point.

now that ive explained her backstory let me explain why theyd make such a great team/couple/murder hobos together

1. THE SAME PROBLEMS

First. They both have a hunger for flesh and blood. Its both in their nature to eat and to feed on human flesh and they cannot seem to stop that.

Second. They both seem to have a longing for a connection. Weve seen bm yearn for a connection, or some sort of understanding- fuck weve even seen and heard him call several people fathers you cant tell me this fucker wants some sort of bond. While my girl, Noface (NOT THE STUDIO GHIBLI CHARACTER FUCKERS) also has seen relationships. Her victims- she cant seem to help but be curious about it.. wanting to *try* something as nice as that.

third. They both know what its like to be used constantly. Weve seen bloodmoon constantly go from person to person to be used by a tool. Noface has faced that same problem with one person for YEARS. I feel like they could relate, and empathize with each other with that problem. Even though they both wont admit it right away.

fourth. Theyre deeply embedded on their "purpose" Bloodmoon thinks killing is what theyre good for and the only thing he can do. that and it HURTS them to stop. honestly same with noface. She believes that shes nothing more then a monster who was destined to kill. To be used as a weapon either way.

2. GOALS

Theyre both animalistic monsters whos sole goal is to Eat, and hunt... ehe REVENGE on certain people.

3. PERSONALITIES

Both have wild, loud, and crazy energies. Thanks to that i feel like they could keep each other entertained and not be overwhealmed by the others snarky personality, or the others edgy, shocking humor..and the sass. I feel like their energies could compliment each other.

🥰 Thats it. thats the fucking post🥰

✨( Expect me dumping more at some point. maybe something about how they met, how they developed a fondness for each other, and how they ended up together in the end. Why? because i just have that autistic rizz no else one has )✨

[smoosnoom]

You write so beautifully.

I can't even begin to describe it. I'm super new to the ST fandom but I've had a few ideas and I was wondering if you had any tips on how to properly write the characters? Byler specifically, but the whole party for sure.

Oh, and superheroes. How does one even write about superheroes. Any idea?

Thanks, T

hello !!!!! im sorry for taking literally Forever to finally answer this ask, i hope i am not too late, or that this is still useful when u see this :)

thank u so much !! hmm me personally i am not even sure of how to write characters LOL but ! some things i think help when writing byler are maybe taking into consideration their personalities ! theyre multidimensional and fictional (obviously 😭) but thats amazing because !!!! u can take any facet of them and make it all the more exaggerated, a lot of scenes u see will fed up and rolling his eyes, u could emphasize in on that, or mike being so clueless, all of it is canon and u can have as much fun as u want with it :) there's no real way to write a character because they are all subjective ! do whatever u want with it !!! most likely people will enjoy it, there are so many enjoyable interpretations of them that u usually cant go wrong !!!

specifically for dialogue though, thats a little different !! i quite literally try to visualize and imagine the characters saying it, if the quote has any kind of words that just . sound wrong in their voices or just dont sound like something theyd say, even just by making a character too well spoken sometimes makes them sound out of character . an example could be just . mike being way too confident when he talks about his feelings, he's really articulate but he always includes "i don't know"s or "um"'s or just general stuttering ! i recommend just rewatching some scenes and seeing what words the characters tend to repeat :)

so just in general i think its good to go back to the source material and do some comparing-contrasting with ur work !!! and Remember that its fanfiction, u cant rly go wrong with it :]

and . superheroes . i have no idea 😭😭 i really aimed for humor with my own fic of superheroes, not much realism, so i didnt exactly focus on the semantics of it . but ! i did try to be creative with the verbs iused to describe the way they move, since theyre "super" u can have a lot more freedom with what they do to fight or move !!!!! it depends on what kind of approach ur taking i think ! something realistic verus something humor-based often contrast very much when u try to write them LOL

sorry if i wasnt a lot of help !!! and i apologize for taking so long to reply, it wasnt intentional at all !!! thanku for the ask :)

[fraener]

8/1/2024

woke up early this morning to the cool dawn air pouring in and golden light on the oak. i feel like elementary school this morning, and like i am looking at a stranger's work again. i think i can smell the sweet moldy back seat of the van right now. i am paying all the last of my dues and getting everything ready. f is coming to see me today, i think, and i feel weighty with emotion i cannot articulate. i am thinking about excitement, and when the last time i was excited was. i am mostly afraid these days. theyre often the same thing, i think, at their base element. i think f is going to keep the baby. i dont think either of us thought theyd ever be the first of our friends to have a baby(other than ella, of course, who i havent spoken to in years and years) but here we are. i forgot that things are easier and harder without therapy. i really forget myself in the worst of the emotion when im regularly attending and thus forget to see the good. i am afraid at night and excited in the morning. everything is coming around again with so much humor. the 5 oclock whistle is back, they took the papers down from the windows in the castle, the vibrations stopped, and now on the day i signed the lease termination the big lamp across the street finally turned back on(with ofc a much brighter and worse bulb). yesterday someone was playing flute in the park like that first summer, on lammas eve. im stressed out about getting rid of so much of my belongings, i still dont know where im going to put my big furniture, and im feeling left at sea by my family in so many ways. lately ive been letting myself be proven gently true in just how uninvolved and outside of responsibility my family can make themselves to be. i wonder how many peoples fathers simply flat out ignore texts and calls from their kids. i wonder how many peoples grandfathers ask that they dont express that theyre upset because it might be upsetting to someone else. i feel relieved, in a way, that i somehow am coming out from underneath the cultural burdens of being british. if i ever go back theyre going to hate me on that island. im listening to the sounds of morning traffic and a parking officer emptying the coins from the meters into a big sack. there arent any lights shining in the windows of my new apartment, ive never been without a street light, not once anywhere but colorado. i guess the closest would be at my grandmothers house, where the street light shone in a window parallel with my bed as opposed to crossing it. im watching the dew evaporate off of the black tin roof of the castle across the street. ill be living under a huge old walnut and a portly hawthorn, and on the other side in the shadow of a juniper hedge. plum trees, a big garden full of veggies, place to keep the little boat, a lawn, a porch...ducks and chickens next door. i think ill feel really removed from everything there so its good im applying to teach a few different places. i feel like i used to enjoy being online a lot more and i dont have any interest in it these days so theres a bit of a void socially. i think i might need to find another job, though. and friends, if i can. im glad i rested yesterday, its going to be very hot and busy today. i miss the city, ill miss it even more i think when i move back into bumpkin territory. now i can smell the sea.

[demadogs]

I've been rewatching s3 for the first time in a while and I know the popular opinion is kind of that Mlvn started majorly going downhill in that season but tbh I don't really see it. The only things that stand out are the fact that Mike is less interested in his friends than previously, and the scene at the end where El tells him she loves him and kisses him and he seems a bit confused, you know what I'm talking about. But other than that, it seemed like typical teen drama to me, the kissing, his reaction to the break-up, trying to make it right again, I have to admit those scenes all seemed genuine to me. In my opinion, if there was a shift then it was between s3 and s4 because while I can say that they were still pretty cute in s3, in s4 I'm over it. I'm not sure if you ever liked Mlvn but either way, what do you think?

i see your point. in s3 theyre not depicted that much differently than lumax, mlvn just got more of the spotlight. thats a huge difference in s4 when we see how much lucas and max really love each other. but in s3 i could see how people would still like them. the big thing for me tho was just having the comparison to mike and will. it wasnt just a silly humorous break up, it was that in comparison to a very emotional fight alone in the pouring rain. and i also think the comparison to el and max is very telling too. max had to enlighten her that theres more to life than stupid boys because ALL mike and el did was kiss. when did they ever bond over things they had in common? max had to basically teach her how to be a normal teenage girl and find her own style and be her own person and i think being with mike held her back from being herself.

youre right, there was a big shift from s3 to s4 and i think that shift was in s3 mike genuinely believes hes straight but in s4 mike is trying to be straight. theyre both making out not because theyre in love but because they think thats what theyre supposed to do but for different reasons. el, because she doesnt know any better and shes still very new to normal life, and mike because i think hes kinda convinced himself that he likes it because hes never even considered that he might not like girls.

i wouldnt call them toxic until s4 and i think this is entirely because mike knows hes gay now but hes suppressing it and in doing so, hurting el and will in the process. el because shes putting more effort into the relationship than mike is, and will because hes feeling like hes losing his best friend because he wouldnt call or write and didnt hug him. and again, the comparison to lumax in this season is very telling. we get a representation of genuine love and they werent even together this season but we can still see that, meanwhile mike and el were technically together the whole time but they werent nearly as genuine as lumax. if they were i would love them. and this goes back to what ive been saying about lumax being a wonderfully written couple, so if the duffers are capable of writing a relationship this good, why wouldnt they approach the shows “main couple” in this way if theyre endgame? dont they want us to like them?

i liked mlvn in the first and second season but i wasnt ever like obsessed with them or anything i just thought it was a cute young relationship. in s2 i noticed byler and liked the idea of it but i never even imagined theyd actually go through with it. by s3 i started to realize byler might actually happen because a lot of mikes actions and the film choices they made were questionable so i didnt like mlvn anymore because i believed mike was gay.

[dapperrokyuu]

For the ship bingo I'll give you multiple but if you only want to do one just pick the one you want to talk about most. Sharon x Reim, Ozecho, Amelia x Noé. I swear I've seen you post about Ace Attorney but if I'm making that up ignore this but Faraskye and/or Klapollo

Ask game is here!!!

Yes, I know Ace Attorney, Ive gotchu. Hella down to do more, so Ill do them all, lets gooooo- Under the cut so its not too much scrolling for people, lmao.

Sharon x Reim

Im definitely not against them, but I also didnt really. Need them to be a thing, haha. Could definitely see how some people think its out of nowhere, and if Im to be honest, Im pretty sure this occurred because Mochijun really wanted Reim to be happy, lmao. I also think this was intended to parallel Sheryl x Rufus, but be successful, lmao.

I could say that Reim's behavior in his Side Episode was a bit Weird(TM), as his calculative-ness could come off as, like, Not Being Able To Take A No, but I definitely do think its intended to be just a quirk of his; plus, concerning Sharon's personality, she would definitely hold her ground and not be taken advantage of if Reim was ever a Weird Person, so its honestly fine. The idea of Reim dealing with Sharon’s sadism is also extremely hilarious.

I have considered of the concept that Sharon may have married Reim because of Break, but I just. Dont want to think about it that way, lmao??? Plus, I think Sharon would have the sense not to marry someone just because of Break anyways. Adding to this, Sharon's subtle arc is how she was deprived of being a "normal person," but she embraces it and makes what she wants of it so that it isnt a loss to her. This would translate (for me) into Sharon ultimately not being able to have a relationship with someone who has no understanding of the Abyss and her experiences, so it would make sense that she would bond more with Reim and get closer to him because hes the one who understands most. Ultimately, there isnt too much on them canonically for me to be diehard for them, but it definitely makes sense and has tons of potential that appeals to me.

Also, the Rainsworth has relations with the king of the country, and as Lily would definitely be their daughter after a certain point, theyd have connections with the Baskervilles. Itll just be interesting shenanigans for both of them post-canon, lmao.

---

Ozecho

THEYRE GOOD. Thats all I can really say. Echo is like one of my top 3, and she deserves to be happy. And Oz is top 5, and he deserves to be happy. I think their appeal ties into the fact that they have an understanding of each other's situation, and with that, they can confide in each other. Oz can bring Echo into new situations and encourage her to be open, while Echo can be there for Oz's low moments. Overall, I think they can bring the best out of each other, romantically or not. Regardless, theyre very important to each other, uwah... I do enjoy Oz's flirtiness and Echo's bashfulness, its very fun and endearing, haha.

---

Amelia x Noé

Theyre very cute, theres just not much of them in canon. All we have seen of them is very surface level, and I think I get engaged when people have a deep understanding of another. Not that its either of their faults, of course, haha.

But regarding aesthetic! I dont know...Amelia can be a cute princess, with Noe as her prince.....which is pretty much how he was in Chapter 1, and could be how Amelia envisions him privately, haha. I do think Amelia's side of the relationship is very interesting, good for her for being subtly forward. Girl's got a GOAL. Theres tons of potential for cuteness and humor, tbh.

---

Faraskye

VERY CUTE. Its the whole "theres not much of them in canon," BUT THE POTENTIAL IS VERY LARGE AND INTERESTING. Like, when I thought about it, I thought it was a RARE rarepair that only Id think of, and I felt so big brain, lmao. "Ema would TOTALLY be into Little Thief, and she and Kay could bond over showing each other cool stuff and testing them," but people are WOKE, thankfully. Both also have their own fleshed out backstories, which feeds into the potential and interest. Both of their backstories are also family-themed, so I think they can bond over that as well. I think they would just amaze each other with their respective interest, itd just be so cute and sweet. I wanna see them interact again, ahhhhh- But bright and sassy together? The sassy one also getting brighter with the bright one? Bright one learning how to sass MORE due to the sassy one? Art.

---

Klapollo

This ironically got the most circles from me, lmao-

Their tandem is REALLY good, for reasons that most people would commonly say, lmao. Theyve got the fun dynamic but then the deeper understanding that they can confide in each other about. Both are relatable in their own ways, but I would probably relate to Apollo more, lmao. I dont particularly need any ship to be canon, but this one should due to the depth and also it would be funny, lmao. AND KLAVER WOULD COME BACK TO CANON, IN ITSELF A GOOD THING, YEAH. Anyways, who wouldnt mind smooching either of them too, lmao, lmao, lmao-

Hope this was enjoyable, haha. Thank you! @torterrachampion

[intriga-hounds]

Prompt: No punctuation

this is actually from week 2, but i never shared it bc i hated this prompt!!! punctuation is my everything. 

anyway, i was unhappy with what i wrote, so i rewrote it from a new pov. the rewrite is at the top, the original is beneath. 

this is easily my least favorite thing i’ve written for this club lol

Revisit: Changed POV

Well the mall was open again today thank goodness I nearly committed infanticide about thirteen times during the shutdown and even while I was out I wasnt completely sure I didnt want to stop at Home Depot on the way home for duct tape and a shovel you know what I mean hahaha oh no you know I love Brynly and Jaxsen more than anything in the world I would absolutely never anyway as I was saying the mall was finally open again thank you Governor Newsom finally using some common sense and so I left the kids with Ryan to have a little time to myself but not all the stores were open so I had to sweep through real quick to see what was open so that I could plan the whole thing out luckily most of my favorites were open like Lucky Brandddd Nordstrommmm and Lululemon and I have been DYING to go to Lulu because I just started a hot yoga class in Huntington Beach that was supposed to be closed but has just stayed open anyway and you dont even have to wear a mask well anyway there was a line at most of the stores and just about every place was having a sale God there were signs everywhere 50 percent off this BOGO that basically it was a dream come true so I started at Lulu since you know thats my absolute favorite I mean I scoured the app the night before to look at all the cute new summer stuff and when I walked up there wasnt any line which was amazing but there was this girl like guarding the door seriously like actually guarding it like a bouncer she even looked like a bouncer like she was kind of you know on the heavier side and really mean looking but shes in head to toe Lulu so I know shes not actual security shes wearing like the spring 2019 Wunder Under tight and then she had that new Cates Tee Ive been wanting I mean it was MEANT for me it has the same name as me like Kate in a Cates Tee just has to happen so I go up to the doors to go in but Bouncer Girl stops me and is like maam did your appointment come up and Im like excuse me appointment and she goes oh yeah if you scan this QR code itll lead you to a webpage where you can join the virtual line to shop in the store the wait is about 30 minutes right now and Im just floored Im like 30 minutes and shes like yes 30 minutes there are a few parties ahead of you and Im just looking at her like wow I mean it was unbelievable I mean you could see into the store and it was basically empty and I told her that but she was just like yes thats because the store only has a capacity of 15 people according to the safety guidelines and I just was like really seriously that makes NO sense cant you just let me in when those people are done checking out and shes all no Im sorry maam theres a party of three who are next in the virtual line and I just start laughing in her face because that line isnt REAL and theyre not even HERE they wouldnt even KNOW I skipped ahead of them I mean I already know what I want anyway so just let me in I just want to pick up a few things and then she gets this tone with me shes like well these other parties just want to pick up a few things too maam were happy to have you shop with us but youre going to have to join the virtual line and I just cut her off there I was like whatever no forget it Ill just take my business elsewhere I mean obviously because if this is how they treat their customers why would I even go there just ridiculous and honestly Im still thinking about calling corporate because thats really wrong I mean Ive shopped there for years and most of the gals working there know me by name I dont even know who this girl was but she mustve been new because she just didnt have a clue and she was so rude because even as I was walking away she goes have a nice day with the fakest cheer Ive ever heard like I just know she thought she was so hilarious the next time I go to the mall Im going to see if the store manager is in because someone like that just shouldnt be working for Lululemon you know what I mean like theyre an established and really classy popular brand and for that price point they really shouldnt be abusing their regulars like this its just wrong but yeah anyway if you do go to the mall make sure you look out for virtual lines or whatever because it seriously ruined the whole trip for me

Original:

The mall was open again thank goodness Kate had nearly committed infanticide about thirteen times during the shutdown and even now wasnt completely sure she didnt want to stop at Home Depot on the way home for duct tape and a shovel mostly that was a joke to herself a little Wine Mom humor if you will after all Denise had said something similarly hilarious last week at Mom Group but it wasnt really something you could say to just anyone or theyd call the cops or something thankfully there would be no need for that the mall was open and Kate could actually leave the kids with Ryan and have some time to herself though not all stores were open most of them were including many of Kates favorites such as Lucky Brand Nordstrom and Lululemon some had lines to enter but others were ready and waiting for her their windows filled with giant sale signs and bogo deals slashed prices and numbers with percentage symbols it was altogether overwhelming Lululemon was first on her list as she had already scoured the Lulu app for cute new arrivals she was interested in trying on surprisingly there was no line just a plump girl in patterned 28 inch Wunder Under tights from last springs collection and the new Cates Tee in brick an aptly named top Kate felt since it was at the top of her wishlist but as she went to enter the store Wunder Under stopped her with a maam did your appointment come up appointment yes if you scan this QR code itll lead you to a webpage where you can join the virtual line to shop in the store the wait is about 30 minutes right now thirty minutes yes there are a few parties ahead of you Kate gaped at her this is unbelievable she said the store is practically empty yes thats because the store only has a capacity of 15 people according to the safety guidelines well cant you just let me in when those people are done checking out no Im sorry maam theres a group of three who are next in the virtual line theyre not even here so why cant you just let me in I just have a few things I want to pick up yes well we are happy to have you shop with us maam but youll have to join the virtual yes okay whatever I get it maam are you going to no forget it Ill just take my business elsewhere okay have a nice day yeah

Challenge from the book: punctuate the following sentence with only three semicolons

All that is is all that is not is not that that is is not that that is not that is all.

[let-it-raines]

Second in Command (Epilogue - Part Seven)

Summary: Life as the “spare to the heir” isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be when you’re the supposed screw-up of the family, but people don’t know what really happens behind closed doors.

Rating: Mature

A/N: You guys are totally going to be annoyed with me for how I left it on a cliffhanger when I totally didn’t have to except to show some character growth and how things change...which I guess is exactly the reason I ended it that way :D

Found on AO3: Beginning | Current

Tumblr Chapters: | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14| 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20

Epilogue Parts: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 

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“Can I come in, son?”

“Yeah, of course,” Killian answers automatically, the shock of his father just showing up at his door stunning him for only a moment. It’s not like he never visits. He usually just calls or texts first. “I didn’t know you were coming over, dad. Why didn’t you call?”

“Oh, I was visiting the kids and thought I’d drop by since I knew that the two of you had returned home.” His dad steps inside, squeezing his shoulder before leaning down to pet Indy. “Hello, darling,” he then greets Emma, kissing her cheek before wrapping her up in a hug. “How are you feeling today?”

“Good, good,” Emma insists, her eyes still blown wide as if she’s actually been shocked. He knows she’s still a bit rattled from the flight and her nausea. The same thing had happened when they went out sailing the morning of their anniversary, before the disaster of the rest of that day, and even though he had been wary of it, Emma insisted she was fine. She never said she wasn’t, but the green of her face told him otherwise. “How are you?”

“Kicking pretty high for my age.”

“You are not old,” she laughs, tugging on Indy’s leash. “Do you mind if I take Indy for a quick walk? Let her run around a bit. She’s been told she’s going outside, and I’m afraid she’ll freak out if she doesn’t get to go.”

“Of course, dear. I’ll chat with Killian, and the second you two come back inside, I want to hear all about how you’ve been since you left us to go holiday in the warm sunshine. I swear it’s rained for the past week.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Emma takes a step over toward him, leaning up and kissing his cheek, whispering that she’ll be right back before taking a step outside with Indy and leaving him with his dad.

“Do you want something to drink? Eat?”

“I’m fine.” His father begins walking to the living room, settling down into the recliner he prefers when visiting all while Killian sits down on the couch next to him, only a side table between them. “So how was your holiday?”

He almost chokes on his own saliva thinking of all of the things he absolutely cannot tell his father about their holiday as well as wondering if he should bring up the privacy issue just yet. He doesn’t know, is never truly sure about these types of things. He could have a nice, normal conversation with his father or it could turn into another tense, stressful one. He’s had enough of those for a lifetime, but he also knows that he doesn’t have all of the time in the world to fix this. He’s got fewer than four months, really.

“It was wonderful,” he finally answers, his lips ticking up on one side. It really was wonderful to get away with Emma and only have each other for awhile despite the disaster that was their anniversary. It got better, though. It wasn’t completely bad. They had the sailing trip and the takeout meal that was better than anything else they’d eaten if only for how comfortable they both felt. He felt his son move for the first time, which was bloody brilliant and most definitely his new favorite thing. “It’s a gorgeous island. Emma mentioned something about asking you to make our beaches like that.”

Brennan barks out a laugh, the wrinkles on his face all gathering together while his gray hair shakes the slightest bit. If Killian was a betting man, he’d guess his dad is getting his hair cut in the next two or three days, keeping up with his lifelong schedule of haircuts. “If only I could. That would be bloody wonderful. But I like the way she thinks.”

“She’s definitely a brilliant dreamer.” He trails off toward the end of his sentence, looking down at his hand and twisting his ring around his finger, his constant physical reminder of his lifelong commitment to Emma, as if he really needs one. “Can I talk to you about something, dad?”

“Of course.”

“I know, well, I know that things were different when I was a kid, that technology wasn’t as advanced, that I was a bit of a surprise child and that you were on the older side when I was born.”

“Well, why don’t you just call me elderly then, Killian? And you have absolutely no proof that you were a surprise child.”

His dad laughs when he speaks, but Killian isn’t finding a lot of humor in it, knowing that he’s likely going to upset Brennan with his words.

“What I mean is, I know you weren’t really, truly involved in my life. And I’m not blaming you or trying to make you feel…upset, but I need a very particular kind of advice that really only you and mum or Liam and Abigail can give. And I’m honestly not even sure you can give it.”

“What’s wrong, Killian?”

He takes a moment to collect himself, hundreds of words on the tip of his tongue but none of them feeling quite right. But he has to say something, so he might as well speak the truth.

“How the hell am I supposed to be a father in a world where I can’t protect the privacy of my wife and my child? There were, um, photographers who rented out a house and used scopes to take pictures of us on the beach. And Emma and I got into a pretty nasty argument about it. She’s worried…I’m worried about Andrew’s privacy. We want him to live a life as normal as possible. We don’t want photographers following him to school or to the park, and I just – I don’t know how to fix it.”

He’s been clenching his fist all while he talks, the tenseness in his hand almost painful while hot tears form in his eyes, every fault and every insecurity he’s had long before the fight with Emma coming back and assaulting his senses, making everything a dark, cloudy blur.

Brennan looks calm, secure, the blue of his eyes not changing while his eyelids rapidly blink, his brows furrowing and the lines on his face increasing. Has he said too much? Shown too much emotion? Asked for the impossible?

“The fact that you have very obviously beaten yourself up about this proves that you are a better dad than I ever have been.”

“That’s not what I meant, dad. I didn’t – ”

“I know, Killian. I’m not taking offense to anything. I was a poor excuse for a father for the majority of your life. I was focused on Liam, on my job, on the protocol and the way that my father raised Albert and me. All I knew was that fathers were not supposed to be close to their children, and as much as that hurt me as a child, I stupidly believed it. The fact that you have forgiven me is something I still can’t believe.”

He leans over and places his hand on Brennan’s knee, patting him before leaning back and wiping at his eyes. “I did it for me, but with the way you’ve worked to change, you deserve it.”

“Thank you, my boy.” His father smiles, settling back into his chair and crossing his hands together in his lap. “But this is not about me. This is about you and your family. So you don’t want Andrew in the public eye? At all? Is that what you’re saying?”

“I mean, we haven’t discussed it in serious length, but yes. I’m sure that Emma will be okay with releasing the occasional photo or having him join us when we go overseas so we don’t have to be apart from him, but I think we’re going to have to take a step back in traditions. And when he gets older, I think we may need to move somewhere much more private.”

The front door opens then, the alarm beep sounding at the same time that he hears the click of nails and the squeak of sneakers as well as Emma’s voice. He straightens up, fixing his hunched back and sitting against the couch in as much of a relaxed position as he can.

“Go find, Killian, girl, yeah,” Emma coos, her voice getting louder the closer she gets to the living room. And then she’s in view, Indy running in first and jumping up on the couch before getting down once she spots Brennan, less familiar people always more exciting than him. Emma walks toward him, sitting down in the seat Indy just vacated and reaching around him to tangle her fingers in his hair, stroking the strands. “What’s wrong? Your shoulders are tensed.”

How the hell does she always know?

“Killian and I,” his father answers for him, seemingly understanding that Killian wasn’t sure what to say, “were simply talking about how you two seem to be suffering from some privacy issues and are worried about your child’s future, that you want Andrew to lead a more private life than normal.”

“Oh,” Emma gulps, her hand stilling in his hair before beginning again, “well, yeah. I know that we all grew up differently and that my childhood isn’t really an option, but that’s what I want, what we want. We want him to be able to be a kid, you know? I don’t want him to be used to cameras everywhere he goes. I don’t know how we’d fix that, but that’s definitely my top priority right now. And forever probably.”

His hand finds Emma’s knee, thumb running back and forth over the material of her leggings while she speaks. He’s here with her, for her, consistently, and he hopes that she knows this.

“Why don’t you two give me some time to think things over? I’ll meet with security. We’ll work out some plans and ideas. You two should probably talk to Liam and Abigail. It’s not, well, it won’t be exactly the same. You have more freedom than them, and they’re not quite as private as the two of you. But they do have experience in all of this.” “Thank you, Brennan,” Emma sighs, leaning back into the couch and scratching at his neck, his eyes fluttering closed for a quick moment.

“Of course, but at the end of the day, above everything else, we’re a family. How you two feel is far more important than any sort of duty and tradition we have, even if I do ask that we stick to the important ones.”

“Actually, I have something else that I want to talk about.”

His head snaps to her, eyes searching for what she has to say, but she’s not looking at him, her gaze trained on the wag of Indy’s tail while her fingers tap over his on her leg, the hand in his hair having stilled.

“What do you want to talk about, love?”

She looks at him then, the smallest of smiles on her face that comforts him the slightest bit, before directing her gaze to Brennan. “I don’t want to walk out of the hospital all made up hours after giving birth. Kudos to Abigail. She is a badass woman for that, but that’s not what I want. Andy doesn’t need to be exposed to so many people as a newborn. I don’t need to be all dressed up when I’ve just given birth. I don’t care about tradition when it comes to this. This is what I’m doing, and I really feel like it’s the first step in taking a stand about him not being some kind of public property.”

He didn’t know she felt that way about any of that, nearly every word she said news to him, but he gets it, supports it. If that’s what Emma wants for this, that’s what they’ll do. He’s never quite understood that tradition anyways, and he likes the idea of a more private celebration with just them and their families while Emma heals and they adjust to the terrifying process of being parents for the first time.

“I’m not sure we can do that, dear.”

“What?” His head snaps over to his dad, trying to process the words. “You literally just said that how we feel is more important than any duty we have.”

“But that we need to stick to the important traditions, yes. New family members are an important tradition.”

“Brennan,” Emma grits, her voice strained as she tries to keep it friendly, “I respect our family and all of the traditions we have, but I am not some kind of human machine who’s only here to produce babies. Yes, of course this is a big deal, but it’s a big deal for us as a personal family, not as some part of the institution. You can still put the sign up, make any and all announcements you want. Hell, I’ll release a picture if we have to, but all I’m asking is that we’re allowed to leave and travel home in peace.”

“I agree, dad. I mean, really. Of all of the things we break and bend, of all of the things we change, surely you can let this one thing go? It’s not hundreds of years ago where people are faking pregnancies and paternities to keep the line intact, which was ridiculous then. I think letting family be family is the most important thing, don’t you?”

“Aye, it’s just…you’ll have to forgive me.” Brennan runs his hand over his face, visibly warring something within himself, the lines on his face stressing. “You were right earlier when you said things are different now. These are not things that I really went through with you, not as prevalent as you. Emma, dear, I’m sorry. I don’t…I shouldn’t have ever considered making you do something you’re not comfortable with. I love you dearly, and you and Killian know what’s best here, not me.”

“I don’t want to disappoint you,” Emma says, getting up from the couch and sitting down on the edge of the coffee table so that she can squeeze Brennan’s hand. “You are so brilliant, and you uphold this family so well. I know that I’m different, that it was difficult to accept me, but change can be good, you know?”

“I know.”

Brennan stays for a little while longer, hashing out a few more details with them before accepting a cup of tea and some food, finally listening to them talk about their holiday all the while scratching behind Indy’s ears, her eyes closed in bliss the entire time. It’s peaceful, relaxing, and he feels his shoulders loosen the longer the conversation goes on, Emma’s laughter and joyful voice sounding throughout the room. In the back of his mind, though, he keeps replaying the conversation, thinking of everything he said, everything they all said, and he’s amazed it all went as smoothly as it did, surprised that his father acquiesced to their private exit from the hospital so easily. He had no idea that Emma wanted that, and he wonders how long she’s been toying with the idea, how many late nights she’s spent worrying about bringing it up. He knows she didn’t just think of it now, that it wasn’t spur of the moment, and he tries to remind himself to ask her about it later, to make sure that there’s nothing else she’s hoarding inside.

She goes through enough, has gone through enough over the years, and she shouldn’t feel like she has to hold things back from him.

But he saves his thoughts for later, letting his dad leave and letting Emma take a nap, her eyes falling shut without her even laying down on the couch. He wakes her before she can get into too deep of a sleep, though, knowing that it’ll hurt her back, and helps her go upstairs to their room, ignoring the curses she’s muttering under her breath about him waking her up. While she sleeps, he goes downstairs to his office, answering emails and clearing out his inbox that he left alone while they were in Spain.

Summer is normally a slow time for them, June and July full of engagements while August is usually taken off to spend in Balmoral. Emma’s due in September, though, a few days after his birthday, and she’s not working after August begins. He is, though, doing his regular work and making a few short trips, making sure never to never travel more than three hours away in case he needs to be home.

But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have things to do now, organizing his files and reviewing the financials for Kidding a Goal until Indy comes walking into his office, her nails clicking against the wood until she’s staring up at him with her mouth wide open, tongue practically falling out of her mouth. He checks his watch and sees that it’s far past seven. He’s surprised she didn’t come and get him two hours ago.

“You ready to eat, my girl?”

That gets her tail wagging before she takes off, running toward the kitchen at such a pace that she’s probably there before he even gets up from his chair. Sure enough, she’s already waiting next to her bowl like the most well-behaved dog in the world, which is not something he expected when he and Emma decided to get a dog last year. But she’s done well, their training working most of the time, but Indy does have the tendency to lick his face when he’s sleeping. He’s not a fan of that.

But she’s his best bud and a constant companion on his runs, so it all evens out.

After feeding her, he hears footsteps coming down the stairs, Emma wandering into the kitchen with sleep-rumpled hair and pillow streaks on her face, her pajama top falling off of one shoulder. She immediately heads toward the fridge, grabbing a bottle of water and some yogurt before settling down on a barstool.

“How’d you sleep?”

She grunts in response, opening her yogurt and eating a large spoonful. “I hate being pregnant sometimes.”

“So not well then?”

“Nope. I felt like my guts were all being squeezed out, but do you know who’s not moving now that I’m awake and out of bed?”

“Andy.”

“Yep.”

She keeps eating her yogurt, quickly finishing it up before getting another carton. He should probably fix something for dinner so she doesn’t consume the entire yogurt supply in their fridge.

“Hey, sweetheart?”

“Yeah?” she mumbles, pulling her spoon out of her mouth and looking up at him, her hair deflating the slightest bit from when she came down.

“You want to tell me what that was earlier? With my dad. When did you decide you didn’t want to do the public announcement?”

“Oh, um, I first thought about it a few weeks ago, but it was really driven home after last week. Why? You have an issue with it?”

“No,” he laughs, leaning down across from her and propping his elbows on the counter. “I think it’s bloody brilliant, that you are brilliant. I like that you want to do things your way…our way. It’s very sexy.” “Oh boy, if you’re looking to get laid right now that is not happening.”

“Well damn. Now I have no reason to compliment you.”

“Shut up,” she groans, tossing her spoon over into the sink, the metal clanking. “But seriously, you’re okay with all that, right?”

“Of course. I want you to do what makes you comfortable. I’m not the one giving birth.”

“Damn right. I think I’m going to give your dad a heart attack though.”

“Aye, definitely. I know he’s trying and he’s being accommodating, but I could practically see the fear of breaking traditions rolling off of him in anxiety-filled waves. But he’s seventy-three. Some things just aren’t going to change.”

“So basically we hit the jackpot today?”

“Yep.” He walks over to the fridge, opening it up and seeing what they have left over from before they left. “What do you want for dinner?”

-/-

“Bloody buggering hell,” he curses, bringing his thumb to his mouth and soothing where he just jammed his finger on the wood.

Building a crib should not be this difficult, but it apparently is. He’s been following the instructions exactly, making sure that each piece is doubly secure, and he’s not sure how it’s taking this long. He should be finished, this crib should be made, and he should be able to move onto the shelves or Emma’s glider that she was insistent on them getting.

He’s spent more time in this room in the past month than he has in any other room in the house, June somehow running away with itself all while he’s been hidden away within these four walls. It took a month and a half for he and Emma to decide on a simple light gray, one that he’s pretty sure is also in their bedroom, but honestly, once they both agreed on the color (likely because they have agreed on it once before), he wasn’t going to say anything else. He did pick out the gray-ish blue that’s on the wall with the shelves (or at least where they’ll go once he gets to them), so he’s pretty proud of it.

Neither he or Emma are much one for designing, though they have gotten a bit more into it since the remodel of the apartment, but he’s pretty proud of how Andy’s room is shaping up, even if the lad will stay in the bassinet in their room for awhile. It’s a simple room, clean lines and clean colors. All of the furniture are different shades of white and warm browns, woods really, with natural accents. Abigail gifted them a large wooden giraffe along with some leaf and animal prints, so those are sitting in the corner waiting to be placed after all of this furniture is built.

His favorite part, though, is definitely going to be the little sitting area by the shelves and the changing table. He’s not under any impression that this is going to be a calm room, a place to relax, but he figures there have to be times when he’s rocking Andy back to sleep in that very spot, the shelves filled with colorful children’s books that’ll become routine reading one day as well as being filled with several stuffed animals and photo frames that he can’t wait to update with pictures. Of course, the cabinets below will be filled with the essentials, the things no one likes to talk about like diapers and nipple cream (that was something Emma did not want to know about, and he honestly doesn’t blame her), but they’re definitely still in the dreamy, picture perfect nursery phase where the messiness of a child isn’t quite a factor.

Really to him, as much as he knows this is real, as much as he sees the physical proof, feels the physical proof (which holy shit is it incredible to be able to feel his son move), it’s still difficult for him to comprehend that in two months he and Emma will have a child. It’s something they’ve talked about for years, something they were planning on, but it’s difficult to put into words just how much love he has for his son.

And his wife.

She’s a rockstar in every sense of the word, and if he doesn’t mention it enough, Emma sure as hell will. He loves her fiercely, and that love is another thing that he can’t quite put into words. He honestly doesn’t understand men who moan and groan about their wives constantly. If anything, he finds it disgusting. Yes, you’re going to have disagreements with your significant other. That’s natural when you decide to spend your life with someone who has their own wants, needs, and opinions, but at the end of the day, his wife is his best friend. If there’s anyone he wants to spend time with, it’s her. No question.

If the answer to who your best friend isn’t your spouse or the person you’re marrying, he doesn’t understand why the hell you’d bother getting married. His mates are great, but they’re not Emma.

Maybe he is a bit of the cheeseball that Emma always claims him to be, but he likes it that way.

He’s definitely going to embarrass his kids. All of the time. He can’t wait. He’s got a few years, but he can’t wait.

“You know we can hire someone to do this, right?” Emma asks, a bit of laughter in her tone that makes him roll his eyes. His best friend, most definitely. The teasing is just a small part of that.

“Aye, but I’ve started it, and I intend on finishing it.” “Okay, but the crib doesn’t need to fall apart while there’s a baby inside of it, and the glider doesn’t need to fall apart while I’m sitting on it. That’s, like, a double disaster, and I know you lived by yourself for a long time, but I’m pretty sure you’re not capable of that anymore.”

“Oh, really? Because I was just going to make them as unsafe as possible so that I could live by myself again. I miss being able to stretch out in the bed.”

“You’re so funny,” she teases from the other side of the nursery where she’s putting away the washed clothes in the closet, organizing them by size. He swears they have enough clothes to last Andy for the first two years of his life, and that’s not counting the piles of things he knows David and Mary Margaret have at their house. “I think I may have bought him too much stuff. I don’t even think I own this many things.”

“You don’t mess your clothes up multiple times a day.”

“Good point.”

“I tend to make those.”

“Eh. Debatable.”

“Not at all debatable.” He turns back to the crib, looking at the instructions to see if he can remember where he left off before Emma distracted him. “Shit, this is impossible.”

“I can call my dad, babe. It won’t be a problem. He’s a bit handier than you.”

“Please, I am plenty handy.”

“Okay, well being handy with me is not the same as being handy when it comes to building things.”

“If we call your dad, he’s going to take over. I want to do some of this myself.”

“I will tell Dad just to help. Come on, babe, you love spending time with my dad.”

“Only now that he doesn’t give me the scary speeches anymore.”

“Yeah, I bet those were a lot of fun.”

“I mean, it’s been a solid half a decade since I’ve gotten one, but he still shakes me to my core.”

He hears Emma laugh, snort really, before she makes her way over to him, slowly settling down on the floor next to him and waving her hand until he gives her the instructions. She looks over them while looking at the crib, her eyes continuously darting between the two.

“You put part G in backwards. That’s why nothing after that is fitting.”

“Bloody hell,” he curses, reaching over and taking the instructions from her hand and checking to see if she really did just solve his problem, “how did you see that when I’ve been staring at it for the past hour?”

“Fresh eyes, my love. Fresh eyes.” She leans forward and kisses his cheek before falling back against the wall. “And that’s exactly why calling my dad and asking him to come over in the morning will be a great idea. I bet Mom will want to come too, and she does a mean job with a power drill.”

So Emma calls her parents who agree to come over in the morning. On top of moving, they’ve also begun to change around the hours of the pub, opening it earlier and letting Will close it out at night. And it’s because of this that they show up at eight in the morning, he and Emma both still asleep when their doorbell rings. Emma groans when she hears it, burying her face into his chest and making it impossible for him to get up without disturbing her. He can feel Andy summersaulting around in her belly, and he smiles to himself knowing that she’s going to have get up. She can’t sleep when he’s moving around like that.

He can’t sleep when Emma’s basically running marathons in bed, but that’s not something he’s going to voice out loud. He can get up and sleep in a guest room if he needs to. Emma can’t get up and walk away from the person who’s running marathons in her stomach.

There’s two human feet inside of her. That’s pretty weird if he thinks about it too much.

Okay, so really weird.

Slowly but surely he gets out of bed, letting Emma flip over into his spot, and heads downstairs to open the front door. David and Mary Margaret have a key, but they never use it, always waiting for either he or Emma to open the door for them, which he appreciates after one too many times having them walk in on he and Emma.

“Hi,” he greets, opening the door and ushering them inside. “Emma’s still asleep, but I’m sure she’ll wake up soon. Do you guys want some breakfast?”

“We ate at home, sweetie,” Mary Margaret greets, giving him a quick hug before David does the same. “So Emma said you guys were having some issues in the nursery.”

“I believe that it was more like Killian not being able to put together a crib in under three weeks.”

“So funny, Dave,” he bites, rolling his eyes and locking the door. “I did eventually figure it out. I just think this mid-July heat is obviously getting to me. Or maybe nerves. I’m not too sure.”

“Well, let’s go help then. We’ve got to be at the pub at two, but I think we should be able to get things done.”

After he fixes himself some coffee, not nearly as wide awake as David and Mary Margaret, they head upstairs and begin working in the nursery, assembling the shelves and drilling them into the walls in half the time that it would have taken he and Emma had they done this by themselves. So maybe help isn’t all bad. Before Emma even wakes up, they have the shelves installed and pictures securely nailed on the wall. There are books already being stacked, stuffed animals and knick knacks being placed, and all of the fun nipple creams and breast pumps being placed in the cabinet.

They’re working on the glider when Emma finally wanders in, her hair falling out of its band so that half of it spills down her back while the other half is piled on top of her head, and she’s got her glasses on, something she only does when her eyes feel too puffy to put her contacts in.

“Hey, sweetheart,” David greets, finishing tightening the screw he’s working on before getting up to embrace Emma. “How are you feeling?”

“Rough today. I think the little dude’s a giant or something because he crushes my lungs and my bladder at the same time. So I can’t breathe, and I have to pee. So, yeah, it’s fun.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Thanks, dad. It looks fantastic in here. You guys have done so much. I feel like we’re not going to have anything to do in the next two months if we finish all of this.”

“That’s kind of the point, love.”

“Yeah,” she yawns, covering her mouth, “I know. Mom, do you want to come and rest with me in my room? My back hurts today, and I just can’t sit on the floor in here with you guys.” “Of course, hon,” Mary Margaret answers, walking away from the closet and stepping over to Emma before she rubs up and down her back. “Are you sure you don’t want Killian to join you? David and I would be fine to work on our own.”

“No, it’s fine. I bug him all day, and I’m kind of thinking that you can paint my toes for me or we can watch movies or something. It’s been awhile since we’ve done that.”

“Text me if you need me, love,” he tells Emma, his eyes tracing over her in a bit of concern. It’s difficult watching her be uncomfortable or miserable on some days when he literally can’t do anything about it.

“Yeah, babe, I will.”

Emma and Mary Margaret walk out of the room, their voices fading away as they walk into their bedroom one room over, and he’s left with just David who promptly gets back to work finishing building the chair. Music plays in the background, an eighties’ playlist he thinks, and it doesn’t take longer before the chair is completely together and he’s sitting in it testing it out. It’s comfortable, probably one of the best seats they have in the house, and he can definitely understand why Emma insisted on this one after shopping around a bit.

“How does someone so small have so much stuff?”

“My child is twenty-eight years old, we don’t even live in her childhood home anymore, and I swear things of hers still pop up all of the time.”

“That’s likely because Emma leaves everything all over the place.”

He folds his hands behind his head, closing his eyes and rocking back and forth while Cherry Bomb plays in the background, which is definitely not a nursery appropriate song. Or maybe it is. Who needs Mozart when you can have The Runaways?

“So is Emma like that every day?”

“Like what?” he asks, popping an eye open to look at David who’s sitting against the shelves, which can’t be good for his back. God, how old is he getting if his first concern is for someone else’s back?

“Exhausted.”

“No, not every day. She’s usually got a hell of a lot of energy, even if there’s always a nap. I think she had a restless night. She’ll tell me like it is, though. If she’s having a bad day, she’ll let us know.” “What about you?”

“Well, I don’t have a baby crushing my lungs and my bladder.”

“True,” David laughs, running his hands through his short hair. Killian swears it’s gotten more gray in the past year, the blonde nearly disappearing. David is only fifty-two, so he’s not exactly older. Hell, if it weren’t for the wrinkles on his forehead and the gray hairs outnumbering the blonde, he’d look much younger. “But I remember being a dad for the first time. It’s terrifying, so you’re allowed to be scared.”

“I am. It’s…” He reaches up and scratches behind his ear, his hair getting long enough that he knows he needs to get a haircut soon. “Emma and I try to make sure that we keep up our normal routines, that we have our normal conversations without talking too much about the baby, but it’s kind of hard, you know? It’s like we’ll be talking about going out to eat and two minutes later we’re making a list of middle names or speculating if he’s going to look more like me or Emma.”

“I know. But it’s an exciting time, Killian. There will never be anything like it, and if you want to talk about the fact that you’re having a kid, you should. You and Emma have been together for so long, and I really don’t think your relationship is going to struggle if you’re not sitting around making references no one else understands for hours on end.”

“Oi,” he protests, resisting the urge to pick up the toy elephant next to him and throw it at David, “that is your daughter you’re mocking, and she can still kick your ass.”

“Trust me, I know. Who do you think raised her to be like that?”

“Mary Margaret.”

“You’re walking a thin line.”

He winks at David, his lips ticking up on the right into a smirk. “I know. You and Mary Margaret did such a good job, still do such a good job, and even with all of the times you’ve messed up – ”

“ – which is a lot more often than even Emma has probably told you.”

“I just…you’re a good dad, Dave. To Emma, to me. I hope I can do half as good as a job.”

“You’ll be great, Killian.” David smiles at him, something genuine, and Killian’s reminded of how much David really has impacted his life in all of the best ways. “I promise. And as much as I love you, I do love my little girl more, and she’s going to be amazing. She’s always…she’s never been too open to a lot of people, but the people she loves, she loves so fiercely, you know? And she’s already doing so well at being a mom. She’ll call me at nights, and I can just hear the happiness and excitement in her voice. At the end of the day, that’s all you want, you know? For your kid to be healthy and happy.”

“Yeah, I know.” He smiles to himself, thinking of how happy he is. “Also, how dare you imply that you love your own daughter more than me. I thought I meant more to you than that. I thought we had something special, man.”

“I can still give you hell. I’d watch yourself.”

He and David finish up in the nursery for the next few hours until David and Mary Margaret have to go to work, leaving after the three of them eat lunch down in the kitchen, Emma staying upstairs for a nap. When the Nolans are gone and he’s finished eating, he heads upstairs, bypassing the nursery and walking into their bedroom where Emma is sitting up on the bed watching TV.

“Your toes look nice,” he compliments, grabbing onto her big toe and moving it back and forth. “Do you feel any better?”

“Yeah,” she sighs, twisting onto her back and scooting up the bed, “it’s just one of those days, you know? I’m not usually this miserable.”

“I know, but it’s okay to have bad days, love.”

“Come here,” she tells him, crooking her fingers and motioning toward him before she turns on her side and wraps her arms around her pillow. He does as she asks, kicking off his sneakers and crawling up into the bed, the mattress moving against his weight until he’s pressed up behind her, his knee stuck between her thighs and his arm wrapped around her waist while the other rests above her head. This is how she’s been comfortable lately, and he can’t say he minds. “Did you guys get a lot done?”

“Aye, it’s almost all finished.” He moves her hair off of her neck, placing a kiss there before resting his chin on her shoulder. “It just needs your finishing touches, I think.”

“And we have to unpack all of the boxes that are in the guest room and put them away in the closet.” “That too, but we’ve got time, Emma.” She hums, and he can feel the vibrations as well as Andy moving around under his touch, the movements following how he taps his fingers. “Has he been active today?”

“Not since I woke up, but he always responds to your voice.” “Yeah, he recognizes me?”

“Of course, you talk so damn much. How could he not?”

He turns his head and presses a kiss against her jaw, biting a bit just to tease her. “You are not a very nice woman, my love.”

“Oh please, I’m, like, the seventh nicest person you know.”

“Seventh?”

“I figured it was conceited to put me at number one.”

“Possibly.” He moves his hand against her stomach again, snaking his fingers up under her pajama top so that he can feel the warmth of her skin. “So he really does get more active when I talk?”

“Yeah, it’s pretty weird to think about, but it’s true. He likes when you talk. I think it’s because you’re a much better story teller than me.” “I mean, obviously.”

“And that he’s probably just glad to hear someone else besides me. Imagine being stuck with someone for nine months. Good God.”

“Well, I’m stuck with you for forever. Good God.”

She groans and curses him under his breath before she scoots over and turns in his arms, slowly but surely moving to face him. “Don’t be an asshole. Also, so I was talking to mom today, and she wants to be called Mimi. I think Dad wants to be called Papa, which I like as long as that’s not what you want. I know that’s what some kids call their dads.”

“Aye, it’s what Lizzie calls Liam, which is weird since Alex doesn’t do that. But I’m okay with dad or daddy, so David can be called Papa.”

“Yeah, I kind of like it. Mimi and Papa. And then your parents are Gammy and Grandpa, right? That’s what Alex and Lizzie call them.”

“Aye, but I know Mom didn’t want to be Gammy. It’s just what happened. She says it makes her feel old.”

“Your mom is not old.”

“I know, but considering your parents are barely fifty while my parents are in their sixties and seventies, it doesn’t help.”

“I’ll tell my parents to get older then.”

He smiles at her before closing his eyes and settling into his pillow, letting his head sink down into the softness. It’s calming in here, the lights turned off and curtains closed while the ceiling fan hums a steady rhythm above them. He could fall asleep like this even if he’s not the biggest fan of naps, always somehow ending up groggy when he wakes up, and it doesn’t help with the way that Emma is playing with the hair at the nape of his neck, her fingers scratching into his scalp.

“Are you working tomorrow?”

He pops an eye open, looking at Emma and smiling when her nail hits a particularly sensitive spot on his neck. “Aye, I’ve got the Investiture ceremony at ten. Why?”

“Just wondering. I was thinking we could go somewhere. Just us. Maybe take Indy to Berkshire and let her run around, spend some time outside.” “We can do it in the afternoon, if you want. I think the weather is supposed to be nice.”

“Yeah,” she sighs, leaning forward and sliding her lips over his for a brief moment, “I think that would be nice.”

The next day after he’s finished with the ceremony, he hurries home, changing out of his suit and into shorts and a t-shirt, slipping a baseball cap onto his head and grabbing something to eat for lunch while Emma does the same, her hair falling out of the back of her hat in a long ponytail. They’ve got all day, but the afternoon’s weather is pleasant enough that he’d like to go now so they can stop by a café for dinner, even if that’s the absolute last thing that Thomas will want them to do.

They want their privacy, but they should be able to go out to dinner.

So he and Emma load up into his car, letting Indy sit in the backseat with the window rolled down so she can feel the mid-July breeze blow through her fur. It doesn’t take long to get to Windsor, pulling into their parking garage less than thirty minutes later, and instead of going inside like they’d usually do, he hooks Indy up to her leash while Emma grabs some water bottles and they head to the private gardens, avoiding the visitors wandering around on tours.

As much as he prefers the spring, mild July days are near the top of his list of favorite things. Everything is brighter, more pleasant. The grass is actually greener, the flowers contrasting against their background to create a landscape of whites and shades of purple, while everything is covered in a clear blue sky, only a few white clouds scattered throughout. New life blooms, and he gets to be the one to appreciate it, to revel in it. England can be so dreary sometimes, the weather somehow reflecting the moods of most people on their morning commute to work, so he appreciates when it’s not. He’s always loved the outdoors, and if there’s any complaint he has about his home, it’s the small private garden that they have to themselves. He’d like something larger, more space to run around, and sometime in the future, he and Emma plan to spend more time in Bucklebury so that they have the privacy.

That’s what they’ve decided on since returning from Spain last month. There’s been more lengthy, draining discussions with his parents and their security team than he’s ever wanted, and as much as he feels like they haven’t really accomplished anything, he knows it’s a slow process. Of course, there are drawbacks to every positive. They’re still going to have to spend most of their time at Kensington. It’s closer to their work, to their families. Hell, Emma’s parents just bought a house so that they could have the ability to spend time with their grandchild, and now they’re going to move away from them. It’s less than an hour drive, but it’s not nearly as close as they currently are.

But everyone understands, and they don’t plan on moving any time soon, not until Andy’s a bit older. They want to be near all of their loved ones when he’s younger, and they’ve spent so much time working on their home, making it exactly how they want. It’d be difficult to leave full time, so it’ll be nice to have the option of both.

It’ll be even nicer to give Andy the most normal life that they can possibly give him.

Emma whistles next to him, her fingers between her lips, while Indy runs back to them from where they let her loose. She was about five seconds away from jumping into a pond full of fish, and as much as they’d usually let her swim, they don’t need to have a wet dog with them for the rest of the day. So she runs back to them as quickly as she can, her legs leaping in the air with her black and white fur bouncing the slightest bit. He’s convinced that she shouldn’t be able to be that quick, but she’s still just a young dog, less than a year old, and though her legs will get longer, he doesn’t think she’ll ever be full of this much energy again.

If she is, he and Emma are definitely in over their heads.

With the dog.

He’s going to choose to not think of what it’ll be like with a toddler than can run and a dog that he can run after.

After she calms from her almost pond dive, Indy walks along in front of the two of them, occasionally wandering off the stone path to sniff around in the plants, nearly tearing up several flowers until they call her back to keep walking. They stay wandering for a little over two hours, not caring where exactly they’re going or if they’re circling back around in the same spots. Indy and Emma get tired around the same time, so they settle down onto a stone bench with a patio cover that’s next to another small pond.

In the distance, he can see the Chapel where they were married, the steeple rising up above the other buildings and stone walls, and he smiles to himself thinking of that day. In the grand scheme of things, he knows that when it comes to he and Emma, as important as it was, they had so many smaller, inconsequential days that he holds just as fondly in his heart.

But that was a pretty damn good day.

He stretches his arm out over the back of the bench, wrapping it around Emma’s shoulder and tangling his fingers into the ends of her ponytail while she leans her head on his shoulder, the bill of her hat hitting him in the chin for a brief moment. He’s glad she suggested them getting away from London for a little bit, for suggesting that they change up the routine and spend a day enjoying summer, especially since they’re missing out on Scotland with the rest of the family.

A month in the same place as everyone is likely a bit long, anyways. He loves his family, but that’s a lot for anyone.

“I love you, you know?” Emma asks out of nowhere, her gaze never falling away from the rippling of the water in front of them, a fish leaping up out of the water while the lily pads float around.

He squeezes her shoulder, rubbing up and down her arm and kissing her head even if she can’t feel it through the hat. “I know. I love you too.”

[clarste]

Speaking of characters who have a tendency to be seen as massive jerks by a rather significant portion of the fanbase, are the Watatsuki sisters nicer than what many people thinks? SSiB and CiLR really seemed to give a different picture of the two.

Well, “nicer than people think” is a pretty fuzzy criteria. Also I’d have to say that the overall attitude towards them seems much more relaxed than it was a decade ago, when even mentioning them could start a flame war on certain forums. Incidentally, SSiB is over a decade old now, wow. Also WaHH started only a year after it ended? That can’t be right...

Anyway, I’d say that they aren’t cruel or sadistic. You have to remember that in SSiB when facing the protagonists they were up against invaders to their world who’d cause who-knows-what harm. And not only that, they were being suspected by their superiors of being allied with those invaders, so they had to put on at least a little show. Given those circumstances, the fact that Yorihime was even willing to go along with this crazy “spellcard duel” that Marisa proposed kind of shows how open-minded and good-humored she is about this sort of thing. Ejecting them into the vacuum of the real moon and watching them die wouldn’t have been all that unusual under those circumstances.

And while Toyohime threatened to disintegrate the entire forest with her mega-fan, she didn’t. Not even a little bit to show she was serious. I don’t know for sure if it was just a bluff, but to me that says it’s something she didn’t want to do. She just wanted Yukari to back down and not entertain thoughts of revenge.

That said, “not a murderous psychopath” isn’t really what we mean by “nice” is it? It’s certainly gotta be more than that. Well, as we see in CILR, they did adopt a human once. And like a child bringing in a stray cat, they kept it a secret Mommy (Eirin), knowing they’d get in trouble. And when he said he wanted to go home, they confessed to Eirin suggested that they kill him so he wouldn’t reveal anything about the Lunar Capital. Of course Toyohime was horrified at the thought of killing the human she’d raised and fed for three years. And Yorihime too. They were both too “kind” for that. So they got Eirin to come up with a plan to release him into the wild safely.

Which is basically how you should view their attitude towards all Earthlings. The Watatsukis may be kind, but it’s the kindness of “kind to animals.” Hey, they love rabbits too, don’t they? Their fundamental premise is that they are so superior to us that merely letting us live is a mercy. “We could kill you, and that’d be easier, but we’re too kind for that.” But we’re not equals, we’re pets. Just like the rabbits they enslave on the moon, giving them pointless tasks “to give them something to do.” Did they ever ask the rabbits how they felt about this? Of course not. But they adopted so many because they just love animals.

So that’s the level of “niceness” I’d say they’re at. Again, they aren’t cruel, and they won’t hurt people for no reason. They don’t hate humans, or Earthlings in general. But that’s because “hate” is something you reserve for equals. You don’t “hate” rats or centipedes in that sense, at worst you’re just disgusted by them and wish you’d never have to see them. But the cute ones, like humans or rabbits, well, they’re so cute! How could you even think of hurting something so adorable? Even as you deny them their freedom or agency.

Toyohime is a woman who’d catch a spider and toss it out the window rather than kill it. And humans are spiders.

[gweyson]

Min Jung A2, A15, B8, B16, C1, E4, E8, F7, G1 and G4, and Caleb A4, A19, B2, B10, E1, E2, F1, F11, G5 and G6?

A2: alignment are they? Chaotic neutral, lawful evil, et cetera…

either neutral or lawful good !

A15: Is your character observant?

yes but not as much as she thinks she is.... she honestly gives herself too much credit

B8: Is your OC considered funny? Do they believe they’re funny?

shes got the kind of humour that youre either gonna think is hysterical or youll hate it with every fiber of your being. shes in the former camp

B16: Does your OC like to be the center of attention or more in the mix?

she likes to be in the mix....its easier to keep an eye on everything there.....like as amazing as she is unfortunately the attention has to be shared around :/ shes big enough to admit that :/

C1: Does your OC have a moral code? If not, how do they base their actions? If so, where does it come from, and how seriously do they take it?

“ok i have to set a good example for my siblings theyre young and need a good role model” *does anything* “fuck not like that”

E4: Did they enjoy school if they went to it?

she didnt hate it per se but shed never wanna go back lmao

E8: What’s one of your OC’s biggest regrets?

she regrets not doing anything when avery was being bullied when he was younger. realistucally theres not much she couldve done yknow but she still blames herself quite a bit

F7: What’s their “dream career” or job situation?

shed love to be a host on a shitty reality game show but that career doesnt have much longetivity and she doesnt have the patience for a hair& makeup team so shes doing a carpentry apprenticeship instead. she does wanna move on tp interior design at some point tho !!

G1: Is your OC close to their family?

shes closest with avery and caleb (she and avery used to be not super close but Plot(TM) brings them together) shes not close to the other sister they have (who doesnt have a name or design or personality but shes about 13). shes closer to her dad than her mum but shes still p close to both even though the mum is...not. the best. min jung is usually the peacekeeper of the house oops

G4: What kind of childhood did your OC have?

pretty average tbh, nothing much ever really happened to her (at this poijt in time anyway)

A4: Are they a pessimist or an optimist?

optimist! hes almost stupidly upbeat oof

A19: What instantly irritates them or puts them in a bad mood?

people cramping his style.............

B2: Do they get frustrated when lines at places like pharmacies, check-outs, delis, banks, et cetera, are moving slowly?

yeah jfkhvdfgkhj he doesnt like waiting around when he doesnt have to

B10: Does your OC find any “bad” or “mean” humor funny? Do they wish they didn’t?

hes laughed at avery behind his back a few times which he feels kinda bad about but, like, what avery doesnt know wont kill him right? he also laughs at edgy memes a lot which he cares less about

E1: Would you say that your OC is intelligent? In what ways? Would your OC agree?

hes slightly above average intelligence, which accoridng to him means hes the smartest most genius man to ever genius

E2: Which of the nine types of intelligence is your OC strongest in? Weakest? (Linguistic, existential, naturalist, et cetera)

im gonna say... logical-mathematical

F1: What sort of home do they live in now, if at all? How did they end up there?

he lives with all his family !! so avery, min jung, other unnamed sister, and their mum and dad

F11: What are some of their favorite things to do for recreation? How did they get into it? What part of it do they like the most?

ill be honest. hes nowhere near developed enough for me to know his hobbies djkfhgkjdd

G5: Did they go through any typical phases growing up?

he went through a phase where hed jsut cry over anything and everything that happened to him. i dont think thats a typical one but yknow

G6: Do they have any favorite childhood memories?

he avery and min jung would have water fights in the summer when they were younger ! ^__^ theyd get told off by their parents but that never stopped them

[bardofhopeclasspecting]

Mind doin bard of mind for me? Or Knight of Void, its your choice lmao

i can do both!!

bard of mind is a personal favorite of mine. 

bards passively destroy aspect/destroy through aspect. mind is all about judgement, unbiased truth, analytical thinking. 

SO a bard of mind would be one to passively destroy mind or passively destroy through mind. this bard would likely be a jokey bard, destroying truth with little jokes that they tell, not expecting anyone to take them seriously. their jokes would lean towards offensive, feigning ignorance or “i didnt mean it that way.” they know good and well what the joke would be read as, but dont put a damper on my party! its all in good fun. were all friends, right? the bard would be avoidant of any backlash from their shitty sense of humor (as most bards are, avoidant). this bard would love to mimic others to mock them. if youve got a fantroll whos a bard of mind, expect to type other peoples quirks while you make jokes at their expense. the bard of mind who destroys through mind would be the kind who asks the teacher about the homework that wasnt taken up. “what? she didnt say anything about it, so i figured she forgot. why not remind her?” the dumbass who makes every other student in the class hate them. they would the unconsciously be the teachers pet. a real ditsy person who has their thumb up their ass while saying “did i do that?” in an urkel-esque manner.

the challenge for the bard of mind who destroys mind would be to take things seriously. not sit on their ass all “hue hue, its just a joke get over it”. now, for the bard of mind who destroys through mind, they would need to wisen up to everything around them and listen to what people are saying. keep an ear out for the “hey, dont tell the teacher about this, so we can get an easy grade.”

now, the knight of void!

knights have a self perceived deficit of their aspect when really, they have more than enough aspect to go around. to shield their lack of aspect, they over compensate. to someone who doesnt know the knight, they wouldnt guess the insecurity. void is secrets, hidden, nothingness. 

having said that, a knight of void is hiding their supposed lack of void, using that facade as the shield to complete their knights armor. as with all knights, they will exploit their aspect. the knight of void exploits void. they take what others see as insignificant (nothing) and use it to their aid. they take the secrets they know and can help tuck them away or show them to the world. this knight is not above blackmail. “i know about that thing you did when you thought you were alone. i can keep quiet if you help me out.” they would be a somewhat-smooth talker, able to get out of a few tight situations, but not 100% of the time. there are some people who dont care about secrets being revealed after all. i can see them being a lawful evil (any lawful alignment really, but lawful evil would be most likely if i had to take an educated guess). a big scratch my back, ill scratch yours mentality. the knight would fear that knowing void, being handy with void would boil down to being good at nothing, knowing nothing. that thought would always be in the back of their mind, but in reality, theyre very talented/knowledgeable. they would probably have a niche hobby/interest that not many know of either because theyre embarrassed or its just never been brought up before. the fear of void being nothing would likely stem from past bullying they went through. the bullying typically revolving around the point of their worth. the big fear will be Am I Really Worthless? Am I Really Nothing? not many know of their fear because its so well hidden. 

the challenge for them would be to finally come to terms with void not always meaning nothingness. void is unknown. if it was a pokemon, itd be unown. theyd also have a time with realizing that being great with void is an asset and not a burden to always be forgotten, to be whisked away into the void of time since it is endless. 

sorry about the wait. thank you for coming here!

[cerealmonster15]

ddadds kids....

i like thinking about them as one big extended cul-de-sac family... [headcanons and stuff!]

imagine all the families spending the holidays together! i’m sure some celebrate things that the rest dont but theyd probs have one big generic get together during The Holiday Season

all of the kids are crammed together on one big “kid’s table” even tho like half of them are teenagers and there are more offspring than parents

someone always ends up starting a food fight,, usually ernest and lucien, or the twins [either pair. both pairs?? christie and christian vs hazel and briar??]

this was referenced in game once so amanda probs ends up babysitting a lot when she’s home from college for breaks+ during that short time shes still around before she leaves! she’d be  a cool fun babysitter, but tough enough to keep some of the more rambunctious kids in check ;p

[ernest voice] dad i dont NEED a babysitter!!! [hugo voice] son i want to know that i can be away for the weekend and come home to a house that isn’t on fire

ernest is probs really snarky to amanda when she babysits like “youre not the boss of me” and going out of his way to cause trouble, but amanda is Cool and probs gives him a run for his money with snark and idk shenanigans ensue and he probs secretly admires her and thinks she’s awesome but would rather die than let anyone ever find out

lucien looks like he might be fairly close to amanda’s age? they probs dont have all that much in common, but damien’s date revealed that lucien listens to mcr, and amanda made her dad listen to black parade, so I bet they could bond over some music tastes here and there

LET LUCIEN GIVE AMANDA A COOL GOTH MAKEOVER

amanda: pleeeeeaaaaassseeeeeee ;D??? lucien: no way. the goth lifestyle isnt for posers i think with enough pestering she’d get him to cave. he’d take great time and care while painting her nails to make sure he does it Right

amanda probs comments on how careful and skilled he does it like “wow you really take this stuff seriously” “uh obviously??”

once he finishes, amanda takes a pic, and then all the other neighbors see her and are bothering lucien to make them look cool too. he pretends to hate it but actually has a lot of fun and is secretly really happy that they think he’s good at what he does

amanda convinces lucien to do like, cool goth makeup videos and put them on youtube/instagram. she helps him with filming and doing photography of final looks and together they get a lot of followers. sometimes she’ll guest star in his videos if he needs a face model other than his own

amanda’s kinda freaked out by christie and christian at first but over time gets used to and sees past their “creepy twin shtick” and, much like her dad [in the joseph brownie date] learns to use it to mess with them and possibly other people

at first chris probably doesnt talk to amanda a lot and keeps to himself when she’s over, but maybe over time she’d adapt to him and learn a few things hes interested in and express gentle interest in those things to kind of help him open up to her more

chris gets quietly attached to her like shes an older sister

everyone in the cul de sac does. they love amanda

AND EACH OTHER

i want daisy to be involved with the carmensita and amanda girl band thing mentioned briefly during one of mat’s dates. that’d be adorable

you know what else would be adorable? allllll the cul de sac kids coming to briar and hazel’s softball games to support them. 

the kids going to each others’ anything to support them!! when theyre in clubs and activities that put on shows or performances or other sports games, as many of the neighbors that can make it are there

when they get older, they try to be more and more obnoxious to embarrass their neighbors in front of everyone, like making huge support signs and banners with glitter with a stupid yet supportive pun that one of their dads helped come up with, or printing their neighbor’s face on a tshirt or a giant cutout on a popsicle stick, shouting as loud as possible 

they def went to amanda’s actual graduation and PROBABLY ALL CRIED

a lot of this has amanda centric bc i Love Her, but also,,

maybe hugo and craig start going to wrestling matches together [+dadsona] so ernest sees a lot of the cahn kids. if amanda’s in town, she’s with them and in charge. if not, ernest is technically in charge, but secretly [not so secretly probably] the dads are counting on briar and hazel [briar, mostly] to keep things from falling to disaster for the few hours theyre out

they all like to take turns riding on the Giant Dog that ernest got in damien’s route [duchess something i think?] [a good component that should be canon in all universes]

“lets put river on him” “no she’ll fall off” “wheres the duct tape” “n o”

if enough disaster happens leaving these kids alone together, they probably get dropped off at another dad’s house to be looked after for a while. joseph volunteers to look after them but since he and mary are already looking after 4 and KEEP LOSING CRISH, they tend to try and ask literally anyone else

[not that theyre bad parents lmao but it’d be easier for all the other parents that just have One Kid]

i bet christian and christie love robert’s wild spooky stories. he probably makes up so much bullshit to fuck with any kid that’s listening

they’d carpool if they could fit enough kids in one car. it’s probably a 2-3 car carpool depending on who’s driving what size car and who needs to go where at what time

there are probably so many inside jokes[CUL DE SAC MEMES......] that are born at every cul de sac gathering. 

when amanda’s home from college, all the kids wanna be the first to tell her all about the SHENANIGANS she’s missed out on

river and crish are bffs once theyre old enough for human interaction. they Have To Be.

pranking each other in the school hallways plz, or just all around chaos. god help the teachers that somehow end up with 2+ of the cul de sac kids in the same class

ernest definitely sends his dog to poop on damien’s lawn outside lucien’s bedroom window / probably does the flaming bag of dog poop ding dong ditch when he knows lucien’s home alone and will be the one to answer the door

christie and chris like when briar and hazel pretend to be each other, so they get their hands on a pair of scissors and chris gives christie a terrible haircut. possibly briar and hazel try and help with the scheme and things just get Worse and joseph has to take his daughter to a Professional [or maybe one of the dads is really good with hair/has had their child do the same thing and is good with fixing a bad haircut ;p]

carmensita goes through a goth phase after she goes over to lucien’s to be babysat one day. mat does not know how to Deal bc this isnt the type of music hes used to playing but he loves and supports his daughter regardless and likes to hear her singing all kinds of music to broaden her horizons and strengthen her talent

G R O U P  T E X T between all the kids old enough to have phones

there are lots of memes. lots. of memes.

they take candid shitty photos of each other all the time and send them in the chat, and particularly amusing ones end up reused as reaction photos

lucien: [sends photo of ernest having just spilled cereal on himself with duchess in the background making off with a piece of pizza] ernest: fuck u carmensita: mood daisy: why are you having pizza and cereal for breakfast? ernest: dont tell me how to live my life amanda: lol tag urself i’m duchess

this is just something i like to do w/ my friends but they’d probs also stealthily take pictures  of each other when theyre out and about and send them to each other in secret like amanda’s out with her dad at the grocery store and spots lucien and damien in the dairy isle and is like FUCK,, she hides behind a stand of donuts or w/e and takes a pic of them and sends it to lucien w/ no context or like “lol hey” 

it becomes a war of sending pics of each other to each other/the group without getting caught. lucien and ernest probably act like they think it’s stupid but get so competitive about it

they all keep score and it probably also would extend to taking stealthy pics of cul de sac dads too Just Because

the dads find out about the competition somehow and like,,, secretly are so into who’s winning. especially brian and dadsona. sometimes they’ll try and serve as a distraction for their child to get a sneaky pic so they can win, but usually the kids prefer the solo missions

val comes and visits sometimes with cool stories. sometimes she brings her girlfriend, and amanda especially looks up to them like two cool older sisters [i dont remember if it was jacket pins or photography that val said her gf is into, but whatever it is i’m sure amanda would geek out about it with her]

christie and christian eventually grow out of their “creepy twin” thing but still have a more unique brand of humor/personality. the cul de sac kids are used to them by then, and will THROW DOWN with anyone that bullies them/ calls them freaks or anything like that, or anyone that picks on chis [and eventually crish] by association or for any other reason

THESE KIDS MAY ARGUE AND FIGHT AND STUFF SOMETIMES BUT THEY’LL STICK UP FOR EACH OTHER IF ANYONE OUTSIDE THE CUL DE SAC TRIES TO START SOMETHING W/ ONE OF THEIR OWN

i could go on forever making up headcanons or scenarios for these kids bc i love them and constantly crave more content about them but imma stop here bc it’s been over an hour and this is Long but anyway plz talk to me about these kids + the cul de sac as a whole. share ur headcanons,,,,, i l o v e the m ,,

[poshfather]

Hello! Was wondering how you imagine Stan and Craig's relationship to be (like who takes control, what they do together in their free time). Also just wanted to use this ask to say your blog made me like Staig even more! Thanks for all the amazing art (*´∀`)♪

aw thank you!! im glad!staig to me is kind of....messy LOL...theyre not the most stable couple. but to keep this answer short ill just talk about the more happier parts of their relationshipstan is definitely the driving force in their relationship... hes a hopeless romantic and craigs pretty indifferent to things so stan would be the one to organize dates.assuming hes only ever been with wendy beforehand, hed use that experience with craig at first and theyd be your average dates like movies and picnics in the park and ice skating. and of course craig would comply but he really wouldnt be that into it, and stan starts to realize that craigs not wendy and he needs to find stuff theyd both enjoy. so their dates would become kind of unusual, but theyd have fun like...theyd go throw rocks at cars together, or go mess with all the homeless people in south park, or just sit around and play video games for a while. and i think they could even find a balance eventually and indulge in stans romantic side sometimes. one of my favorite things i like to imagine them doing is like ...driving up one of the mountains and like camping out alone in the woods so they can just look at the stars cause craig loves the stars and stan would think it was nice too. and maybe theyd like try to spot animals in the morning or something. idk abfjdkand stan would love stripe and craig would love sparky and theyd bond over their pets too...affection wise i think the most theyd do for a long time is hold hands. cause even if in stans head he thinks hes this like. super awesome romantic guy, hes not bold enough to actually do anything and always pukes whenever he gets the chance. and craig of course gets annoyed and grossed out by that so hed rather just stick with the hand holding anyway until stan can deal with that LOL i also dont see craig much of a pda guy to begin with craig would never hesitate to put stan in his place but can also be really supportive and stan needs that...and stan would probably help craig open up a bit more and make him more willing to try new things. idk when they have their good days theyre honestly just a really laid back couple. and they have the same sense of humor so theyd probably joke around a lot. ....but if anyone wants to ask about the other dysfunctional side of their relationship id be happy to talk about that too

[varricttethras]

29-30-31 for all of them

im sorry this took so long anon i had to think about this one :’-)

“What do they find most attractive in others? Name at least one psychological and physical trait. (doesn’t have to be romantic attraction)”“Do they flirt often? How easily do they fall in love?”“What’s their love life like? Are they interested in anyone or in a relationship?”

sam - men in general set his gay little heart aflutter. but he thinks kindness is an attractive quality to have. beefy guys are his weakness and even more so if theyre shorter than him. sam is a Huge flirt and he can say some of the smoothest things but all his wits go down the drain when a guy starts flirting back and hes just like [WINDOWS ERROR NOISE] hes not seriously interested in anyone at present !

ripley - she’d probably find confidence attractive. she’d def think chubbier people, particularly girls, were cute as fuck because theyre nice & soft and whats not to like about that. she doesnt flirt unless shes in the mood to bed someone quickly. and weirdly enough if she actually liked someone, theyd probably never know it unless they looked close enough at her behavior towards them.

ruby - shes bi but she really likes girls. shes not too big on flirting and shes got a big gay crush on piper.

celeste - she loves big gentle tall girls!!! and its super easy to be taller than her because shes only 4'11. she flirts every now and then, shes not the best but shes very sincere and sweet about it! she’ll nudge sam and sign that she wants him to tell that cute girl over there that she thinks shes pretty. if a girl has spent a little time around her, she might grab her hand and hold it a little or just kiss her cheek out of the blue. shes single and ready to mingle ladies.

ash - positivity and patience are profoundly attractive to her. also muscles. muscles are hot. shes a godawful flirt and she knows it so she just keeps her mouth shut and sticks to the occasional innocuous compliment. honestly shes got a little crush on cherry but i dont think she even realizes it.

vex - people with good hearts or rebellious punk women are 110% Her Type. shes not really one for flirting, she feels like its inappropriate and puts the receiving party in an uncomfortable position. shes not quite ready to let anyone get to know her like that at the moment.

cherry - women with a good sense of humor are hot as hell. women in general are hot as hell. she flirts constantly. shes flirting right now. she’ll flirt with men even though shes not interested in them just because She Can. who even knows if she likes someone seriously (she does).

[moonprincessvhstapes]

word vomit -read if you please i guess

I hate being surrounded by people who probably think I’m a nuisance and can’t do anything right. I think one of the worst things for my self confidence has been becoming a drum major, and yet it’s afforded me some things I couldn’t live without. I’ve had people be down my back from day one criticizing my every move, and it’s never been people “I shouldn’t care about” it’s always the people who I thought would support me most. I thought things would be different from last year with how horrible a singular person treated me but now things are bordering on worse. At least last year there was a “villain” somebody with clear cut malicious intent that could be blamed and you could go “yep it was them” but its different this year. People who were supposed to come out of the dark with me ended up pushing me farther in while it feels like they get to leave. I get nagged on for everything. everything. I don’t understand. I’m one of band directors favorites, or at least I tell myself that because he’s also one of my favorite people and has helped me through a lot so i think i just want to think that. I’m president of my music honor society, I get nagged about that all the time even though im doing better than last years president. and a drum major, who is inept at being a leader i suppose. the one my band director used to go to all the time. Now I feel like ive been pushed out of the frame and i do nothing! And i think a lot of its in my head but my fellow high leadership nag me so much about every little thing and its like!! I guess i can’t do anything. Im a child incapable of individual thought and agency. And the worst part is theyre my friends. They arent bad people, they take care of me. Which is why i can’t and probably never will say anything.It feels like a circle of debt. How can i be unhappy with them when they buy me snacks, or drive me places. They’re more like extensions of parents at this point because i just get nagged so much. They argue everything i do or say. Im always wrong. Ill always be wrong, when am i not wrong? Ill never know. I make them laugh so they keep me around. Im like a court jester who they drag around and when im not making them laugh at a time that suits them im a fucking dipshit! That’s all I am.

And ive been pushed out and away from the one person who made my four years of high school bearable. It’s dumb but im super sad I dont hang out with my band director like i used to. Theres always so many people in his office all the time and i can never get a moment, but when I do it always boosts me up and im my happiest ever when im just hanging out with him. I feel empty when I make other people laugh, but my comedic qualities never feel soul sucking around him. Im happy to make him laugh!! He’s the true mentor I never had growing up. My parents christened themselves as examples of what not to do, though they still inspire me and have positive qualities and traits ill pick up. But my bd (band director) was the person I saw and said “I want to be like him when I grow up” and now it feels like im not special to him anymore. Like its stupid, hes a teacher ill stop talking to in essentially a month when i graduate but the thought of not having him around is unbearable. My band room used to be home but its not very much like that anymore. My bd is the best ever because I feel like he believes in me. He always tells me I need more confidence because he says he knows i can do more and be more. That means the world to me. I just couldn’t hurt him or break his heart though by telling him that the reasons my confidence is an empty shell of what it was because im in band right now and the people surrounding me. I just cant do anything right. I dont mind criticism, it is necessary, I understand it is, but everything. Everything is argued. I cannot do anything right, no good is done by me. 

And my friends can be under the guise of “we just want to help/we care/etc.” all they want but every time. every time i say or do anything. im never right. its grating and draining. theyre grating and draining. I bet if they saw this right now theyd just correct my grammar and disregard everything else, despite my writing this fervently with hot tears, because thats pretty symbolic of how things are for me right now. I think im not as effective of a leader as i used to be anymore either because theyve pushed me out of my spot. Not literally or even in the context of my band/clubs leadership. Like mentally and emotionally. Like i dont do things like i used to because im so used to being wrong or argued or something. I dont trust myself like i used to. WHich is why my bd always tells me to  be more confident but he doesnt know why im not. I cant do anything right. I dont want to hang around them anymore. 

They also make fun of me for my interests. theyre into cool and worldly shit like space and science but i like music. Music is the one thing im good at. Im of the best in our band and dammit i am fucking better then them at music but they still argue me on my music. i tried to give a presentation in english class about music in poetry one day and my one friend tried interjecting with music shit that they thought they knew but i ended up correcting them back DURING my presentation because i was talking to inexperienced people and i didnt want to spread misinformation. And yet they didnt interrupt anybody elses presentation. And like I cant like my anime or my art stuff without it being written off as stupid all the time. Like i use the term weaboo/weeb all the time and it never really bothers me except from them because anytime at all i mention something about anime/manga its immediately “Lol weeb” so i just dont talk about a very big thing that makes me happy. But they never shut up about space or science, and i listen because its noble, its cool to be into space and science, but the arts are just wholly less important i guess. I just live my life around them written off, useless. They “take care of me” so i dont talk back but if they knew how i really felt which theyll never understand, theyd know im just floating along. Its their world and i live in it i guess. I can feel them peeling away from me and just being friends with each other, and im not even mad about it. I hope it happens, theyre probably better for each other than they are with me at all and i hope i find people in college who will listen to me. 

i know its unfair to blame them for not understanding when i also say im not going to tell them anything, but theyve set a precedent in the past for not listening, its not like i havent tried. I just think things have run their course. 

I love music, my bd is the main reason i want to be a music teacher like him, the kids i teach at the middle school are also reasons i want to teach music. I just want to leave school already and then maybe i can start rebuilding myself into what i used to be. Just a humorous person who loves music.