#like im still reeling from the lyrics

[chaoticlivingperson]

Listen i finally got some time to sit down and listen to TTPD and I'm at the 'the smallest man who ever lived' and HOLY SHIT Taylor really said I'm ending this man's life and DELIVERED AN AXE BLOW

[thepoisonroom]

why do none of you watch selling sunset when they have gay people behaving so so weirdly

[madelynraemunson]

i neeeed you to hear me out on this one okay. okay okay so the song is casual by chappell roan and its about like being super intimate w a guy but he still tells his friends you're just a casual fuck. like some of the lyrics are "i've heard so many rumors that i'm just a girl that you bang on your couch" and "knee deep in the passenger seat and you're eating me out, is it casual now?" so like. eddie munson. angst. and reader whos fed up with him being so cocky to his friends ab how he gets her off while he brushes her off. PLEASE hear me out 🫣

IM HEARING YOU ALL THE WAY OUT 😩😩🗣️

(as someone who dated a literal INCEL in high school who was charismatic to all and manipulative to none but me this fucking triggered me. i see you boo)

CW: misogynist behavior, adult themes, 18+ minors DNI

eddie sweetie, this isn't you :( but without further a due...

"If you have to go around telling people that you're a good person, you probably aren’t a good person."

incel!asshole!modern!eddie x fem!innocent!reader

WC: 1.3k words | part two here

Ever since you became exclusive with the ‘Town Freak’, your friends have constantly been ripping your ass a new one.

They were all so wrong about Eddie Munson. Because beneath the rugged, edgy persona he likes to put on every day (spewing his ‘Abolish-The-Status-Quo’ Manifesto atop an unsteady table in the cafeteria) lies a woman-worshipping gentleman, a soft, romantic, misunderstood love-sick puppy who would do just about anything to know you like the back of his hand.

Your dream boy.

"No one ever wants to date the nice guy," Eddie would say to you, alluding to himself. You’d constantly deny his claim. “But the jocks? The rabbits in band? The chess club dweebs? Oh yeah, without a doubt. Anyone but the freak."

It all made you think Eddie was created perfectly for you. That there was some sort of invisible string in the halls of Hawkins High, waiting for just the right moment to pull you two together. And when you two kissed that one day after detention, his hands snaked gently around your waist behind the rusty, faded bleachers out by the stadium, it felt like a match made in heaven.

“You gonna be my girl?” Eddie grinned into you, stroking your cheek, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear. “Mine and mine only?”

“Yours,” you whispered breathlessly to him before reeling him in for another blissful peck.

And soon, lonely afternoons in study hall turned into D&D campaigns with him and his friends. Mundane weekend errands turned into fishing trips with him and Wayne. And soon quiet, anxious car rides became karaoke and head-banging sessions. Once aimless and confused, lost in the melody of life, suddenly all the love songs were about Eddie. You finally found the one.

It all leads you to believe your friends were just jealous of you. True friends would be over the moon.

This afternoon you had a surprise for Eddie. Just last week, you lost your virginity to him and were still swooning over how caring and tender he was with you. Surely, that is the bare minimum for a guy, but the bare minimum is so hard to come by nowadays. Cookies for Discord night with his friends was the least you can do to show how much you appreciate your boyfriend.

After extracurriculars, you rush home to get the oven going, throwing down in the kitchen to make the best snickerdoodles Eddie will ever have. And after one last look in the mirror, fixing your flirty skirt and your plump glossy lips, you set off to Forrest Hills Trailer Park.

Eddie has his headset on so he doesn’t hear your multiple knocks at the door. You knew he would be home though, dude’s got nowhere else to be on a Friday night. Eventually, you decide to hobble out back, looking through one of the windows by the kitchen that he always cracked open just so he doesn’t hotbox the place.

“I’m right behind you, right behind you!” Eddie warns his friends as he nears them in the game. “Gonna need some backup from Gareth the Great.”

Since he’s focused on his electronics, you decide to shoot him a text message. Hopefully then he’ll come to the door.

Hi baby 💕 I brought you some homemade snickerdoodles :)

You can’t help but smile when you hear your custom text-tone go off. But, to your surprise, you watch as Eddie turns a blind eye, chucking his phone onto the nearby couch instead of answering your text.

What the fuck?

"Ugh. She's texting me again," your boyfriend grumbles to the boys as he proceeds with the game. "She's kinda annoying, to be honest. Gonna wait a while before I respond.”

You can’t believe what you’re hearing. Pressing your ear against the mesh blinds that separated you two from each other, you decide to listen in for a while longer.

“Don’t you think you’re stringing her along, Eds?”

Yeah, don’t you think? you think to yourself.

“Yeah, but… free pink,” Eddie sneers with a tsk and shrug. “However I want, whenever I want. She just makes it so easy.”

Eddie then starts to spill the details of taking your virginity, about how you were “chimping out” underneath him on his couch while Wayne was sleeping. What was a sacred ordeal to you was made to sound like a cheap, subpar experience to Eddie. His commentary sends the boys into a spiral, fits of hooting and hollering like it was the best stand-up bit they’ve heard in a long time. Resentment simmers within you. This can’t be the same boy.

“How’d you get a pretty girl like that anyway?” comes another voice in the call.

“Pretty fucking easy,” Eddie scoffs. “You just tell her exactly what she wants to hear. Just say what she says right back to her and the panties come right off. She’ll think you’re soulmates.”

The room erupts with virtual laughter, followed by obnoxious sound effects that the app enables users to send to one another. Your stomach begins to twist, the forbidden cookie dough you ingested just an hour prior threatening to make its way back up.

“HAHAHA,” someone in the chat cackles. “Eds will do anything for that roast beef.”

“I’ve always been keen on them deli meats. Am I right, boys?”

The snickering commences again. Eddie thanks the Discord guys as they extol him in compliments, encouraging him to write a playbook on how to get a proper lay. Eddie ends up shutting down the idea. But not because he thinks it’s fucked. No. It’s because he claims he doesn’t “have to try” and that you just “put out” at the drop of a hat.

The tray of Eddie’s undeserved cookies shakes in your hands as your body begins to tremble. You’re going to be sick. And just when you think it can’t get anymore twisted, it does.

“Hey, what do you think about that girl from math class with the fat ass?”

“Harmony?”

“Yeah.”

“God if she’s into me too I’d dump my girl in a heartbeat,” Eddie swoons.

Of course he’d gawk over Harmony. Outside of Tammy Thompson and Chrissy Cunningham, Harmony Heathers was next up to bat for the Queen of Hawkins High.

“She’s got fucking beanbags where her ass should be. I’d do just about anything for her.”

“And her.”

“Yeah and I’d do her.”

"I'd do her too," Eddie admits.

That’s enough.

You’ve heard enough to know that Eddie ‘The Freak’ Munson was just like the rest. Throwing the snickerdoodle cookies you made for him into the trash, you sprint back to your car and set off for your house, music blaring the entirety of the commute.

My friends call me a loser 'Cause I'm still hanging around

I've heard so many rumors That I'm just a girl that you bang on your couch

You slam the door to your room the moment you get home. And before stripping down and hopping into the safety of a warm shower, you send Eddie one last text.

Actually, you know what? It’s over. Don’t talk to me ever again.

Washing the grossness off of you was the only way you felt you could feel okay.

You wanted the remnants of Eddie OFF of your body. Hysterically sobbing, you attempt scrub off all the dead skin on your body with a loofah. Frustrated tears roll down your face.

I thought you thought of me better, Someone you couldn't lose

You wanted all the dead cells off of you. You wanted a new body. You wanted a new life.

And you couldn’t wait to grow newer, thicker skin. A new shell of you. It will be skin that Eddie can never say he touched.

You said, "We're not together" So now when we kiss,

Fuck Eddie Munson.

I have anger issues

You give the weird kid a chance, and then suddenly he acts like you’re the freak.

[81folklore]

lover - SCHUMACHER

pairings: mick schumacher x wordle!reader (fc: savannah delullo + pintrest)

summary: micks girlfriend always relates everything in her life to the three things she loves most; taylor swift, wordle and her boyfriend

authors note: this is probably one of the most niche things ive ever made but i absolutely love sav and her wordle content and i also love mick so why not put those together?? i dont even know how i thought of this but here it is😭

authors note 2: doesnt have all the pictures i wanted, but i needed this to be one part so i had to shorten it a bit. i ended up mainly using pintrest photos, but that was only because the sav photos i planned to use ended up being in posts i couldnt make due to the 30 picture limit. i actually think this is my favorite smau ive done so i hope you enjoy

masterlist

yourusername

liked by mickschumacher, jackdoohan and 12,728 others

and everytime i look at you, its like the first time

view comments

user11: beach being the wordle today was perfect pinned

yourusername: can confirm i was very happy

mickschumacher: good pictures...must be a pretty cool photographer😂

yourusername: ehh took some practice but he learnt from the best!😉

user82: you guys are so cute

user9: micks looking more and more like his dad everyday :')

user4: im so obessed with your tiktoks

user49: favorite wordle player

yourusername

liked by mickschumacher, estebanocon and 14,287

you got that long hair, slicked back, white tshirt, and i got that good girl faith and a tight little skirt

view comments

user55: officially my favorite couple

user20: dont know who i want to be more

user32: so so cute

mickschumacher: 💚💚💚

user2: i love that she always includes that days wordles in her posts

user72: and if she can, she will relate it to a taylor lyric and make that her caption

user60: and she always tries to match the pictures to the word

user46: are those his dads glasses☹️

yourusername

liked by carla.brocker, mickschumacher and 26,109 others

youre a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town🎞️

view comments

user8: micks smile AHHHHH

user92: im so obsessed with this post

user902: he looks SO GOOD

user65: i cant bresthe omg

mickschumacher: my favourite photographer

yourusername: my favourite muse

user7: I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

user51: no bcs you just dont understand

yourusername

liked by mickschumacher, jackdoohan and 31,273 others

✨i can still make the whole place shimmer✨

HOLY WHAT IS MY LIFE??? so much happened within the span of a night and im in shock. first, TAYLOR SWIFT?? next SWIFT WORDLE ANSWER?? ON THE DAY OF MY CONCERT?? then I GOT THE 22 HAT?? EXACTLY 10 YEARS AFTER THE LAST PICTURE TOOK PLACE?? also lets all appreciate how good both taylor and mick look!!!!

view comments

user4: YOU GOT THE HAT? IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU

user6: you deserve the hat so much!!

user67: what was your reaction to the wordle?

yourusername: i actually did it in the stadium while waiting for taylor, i started freaking out i was so happy😭

user13: love your outifts! did you make both of them?

yourusername: i made micks and he made mine☺️

yourfriend2: im glad you both had fun

yourusername: mwah 💋

mickschumacher: thank you for choosing me to go with you

yourusername: why wouldnt i take my favorite person to see my other favorite person??

mickschumacher: love you

yourusername: love you🩵

user5: the IT couple

user85: i love seeing mick getting involved with her interests :(

yourusername

liked by mickschumacher, georgerussell63 and 40,812 others

we could let our friends crash in the living room

tagged mickschumacher, lewishamilton, estebanocon, lance_stroll, sebastianvettel, georgerussell63+

view comments

user56: oh my god oh my god

user52: theyre literally living taylor swift lyrics

user75: i cant cope

user79: THEY HAD A SLEEPOVER?? WITH THEIR GRID FRIENDS??

user20: seb definitly spun the wheel in twister

user59: definitly had a drink with him aswell😭

lewishamilton: thanks for having us💜

yourusername: always welcome with us lewis🩵

mickschumacher: can i go where you go?

yourusername: can we always be this closee?

yourusername

liked by mickschumacher, lewishamilton and 29,819 others

and at every table, ill save you a seat, lover...

m, you mean more to me than i will ever be able to put into words. the love i feel for you is something so special it feels wrong to just say 'i love you', it doesnt do it justice. you are my entire being and nothing i say or do will even amount to the way you make me feel

3 years ago, forever felt scary, forever felt terrifying, but how can forever be enough now? how will i ever have enough time with you? how will i ever have enough time to love you?

i would say 'take me out and take me home' but no matter where you take me i will always be home if im with you🏠

tagged mickschumacher

comments on this post have been limited

mickschumacher: my favorite person

yourusername: 🫶🫶

mickschumacher: my one and only

yourusername: my lifeline

mickschumacher: forever with you sounds perfect

[fox-guardian]

[ID: A three-page doodle comic of OP, a person with glasses, hair in a bun, and wearing a bathrobe, sitting at a table drawing on a tablet with earbuds in. They are smiling calmly with notes next to them reading "listening to the sam playlist" "like 30 songs in". They reel back suddenly, confused. A note reads "country jumpscare". They calm back down again. "Oh it's about a breakup" they say. Their expression shifts to fear. "Oh." is written in larger bold text. The last panel shows them standing up, leaning on their desk, crying with "AAAA" behind them in giant letters surrounded by question marks with boxes of lyrics floating around them half-faded out. From left to right, top to bottom, they read:

"Oh, that'll have to do

My other half was you

I hope this pain's just passin' through

But I doubt it"

"And I'll dream each night of some version of you

That I might not have, but I did not lose

Now you're tire tracks and one pair of shoes

And I'm split in half, but that'll have to do"

"No, I am no longer funny, 'cause I miss the way you laugh

You once called me forever, now you still can't call me back"

"And I am terrified of weather 'cause I see you when it rains"

end ID]

~~~~

i cannot emphasize how out of place this song feels in the playlist up to this point genre-wise, and it's been feeling like a "this is what sam would listen to" kinda playlist the whole time so im. hello?? hello. god please fucking hello

edit: oh yeah the song is Stick Season by Noah Kahan

edit edit: in my sleep deprived state I forgot to add my disclaimer that I suck at identifying genres. I have been told this song is Folk. not country. my point still stands it was Very Different from Everything Else.

[bitterbutblue]

kokomi my love

when she loved me ☆ kokomi x reader

~ the amount of sad fucking relationship reels i got last night made me sad so now im projecting fuck u isntagram reels algorithm u made me CRY AT NIGHT

inspired by twenty five twenty one, 500 days of summer, u know the drill. if u guys want a full twenty five twenty one inspired long fic (with chapters) i am also down to write one.. i will cry writing it though

song: when she loved me - lyn lapid ~

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────

The summer she fell for you, she wishes to never think about again. Whenever a specific song comes on, she wants nothing more than to go back in time but also wants to destroy the very stereo the music is playing from. She finds herself haunted by her own movements, how they mimic yours and how she still thinks about what you would do before she does anything.

"Don't throw it-"

Laughter rang through the empty violet forests as you threw your head back, uncontrolled and raw. She found herself smiling at the sight of you, so loose and so happy. She couldn't help the laughter that began bubbling out of her own lips as she covered her mouth with her hand, doubling over. She didn't know why she's laughing so hard, she didn't know what was so funny but seeing you so unbridled filled her with giddy she hasn't felt since she was a child.

"That was ridiculous." She giggled and the way you grinned at her had her smile softening- the previous laughter dying on her lips as she feels an overwhelming wave washing over her. It felt like a lyric of a song she doesn't know the tune of, but it's a lyric she can hum from the beats of her heart. It felt like a way back to a home she has not yet entered, it felt like you. You finally composed yourself, running a hand through your hair as the beam of moonlight lit you up like an angel in the night.

"Nothing wrong with that, right?"

You walk up to her, picking up the jacket that had been laid on the ground, used as a blanket to sit on and dusted it off. You wrapped it around Kokomi, buttoning it up snuggly for her as she fit her arms through the oversized sleeves of your jacket, the warmth from the jacket and heart causing her to overheat from an overwhelming feeling.

She has that moment in a picture frame in her heart, like a photo album that had been abandoned and recently found, still dusty but holds a fortune of memories that warm you up. Except this photo album was cold, desolate. Found in a junkyard, memories of strangers and who they once were.

"Nothing wrong with that."

It's a sickening feeling in her gut, churning and spinning and she orders for Gorou to turn off the damn stereo as quickly as possible. He just obliges, not saying anything. She throws down her quill, shaking away whatever memories she has of you. Her eyes dart over her desk, with papers once organised but now strewn all over the place, a lingering memory of the evening you tidied her desk for her hits her hard and fast before suddenly fading into what it was- the past.

"You can't live like this."

A soft voice echoed through the chambers of her desk- she looked up, bleary eyed and you just sigh. You walked up to her, wrapping your arms around her from behind her chair as she leaned into your touch, visibly exhausted. Her shoulders sagged downward, her head resting against your chest as she let out a breath she didn't realise she was holding in.

"I'm doing just fine."

"Really?"

You nestled your head on top of hers as you took one of her hands into your own, interlacing your fingers together.

"It's late. Let's go home?"

''I can't." She mumbles, eyes closing as exhaustion finally settles in between her bones, filling themselves in every crevice and every little nook and cranny of her body.

"Yes you can, darling." You whispered, squeezing her hand softly "They can't have their leader collapsing on them from exhaustion, can they now?"

Like a siren's song, she found herself drawn to your voice. She couldn't even stop herself from nodding as she moved subconsciously, her body just following the sound of your voice as you led her out of her office.

The next morning, she found her office tidied. Her papers organised into a neat stack with sticky notes labelling which papers are which. She picked up the note on her desk and she felt herself grinning ear to ear as she readthe contents on the paper.

Good morning, my love! I organised your desk for you, hope that's okay. If you need anything just text me, love youuu <3

Her desk has been a mess since that day. She had no energy in her to organise her notes or to sort her files. She finds it too difficult to do now, her lack of energy every day being too much. Getting out of bed is hard enough, and she's really not in the mood to have to clean everything when she function with it being a mess just fine (albeit a little harder to get through).

She hasn't had the time or energy to go home, to take the walk down the desolate and empty streets just scares her now with the build up of what has happened. She finds herself taking another way, a route where she won't have to relive the worst of it all.

"Why?"

The broken expression on your face had her swallowing in guilt.

"I'm sorry."

"You say that every time-"

You turned away, taking a shaky breath in as you tried to calm yourself down and Kokomi just stands there like a coward.

"This is exhausting, Kokomi."

She looked down, fidgeting with her fingers as she drops her work bag onto a chair, unsure if she should approach you or not.

She should've approached you that night.

You instead turned around angrily, facing her again and the pained look in your eyes had her looking away now because it ate her alive, knowing that she caused you this much pain.

"Couldn't you just let me know earlier? You keep disappearing on me, I keep worrying about if you died out there or not-"

"I will-"

"You said that last time."

She looked down.

"I'm sorry."

"Stop saying that."

She found herself not going to bed that night, sitting at the kitchen table as she listened to your muffled sobs through the door.

When Gorou tells her it's late, she just nods. The last thing she needs is to lie in an empty bed and feel the coldness of the night wrap its arms around her as an attempt to comfort her or to soothe the once-sharp pain, now faded into a dull thud with each thump of the heart. When she sleeps, she tucks her head into her arms, the hard wood digging into her elbows but the minorly uncomfortable pain is better than having to be overly consumed with her thoughts in the comforts of a bed.

She wakes up to a cup of tea in front of her and for a minute her heart leaps until she's hit with reality once more. She sees Gorou's handwriting and just wishes it was yours for a split second.

Kokomi, take care.

She screwed her eyes shut as she took a deep breath in, refusing to let you see the tears behind her eyes. You just stood opposite her, looking down at your shoes as tears fell down from your face and onto the ground.

"Was this my doing?"

The silence was broken by her shaky question as she finally brings herself to look up at you and she can feel her chest caving in again at the sight of you.

"It's not your fault."

Your voice was strained, as if you were using every atom in your body to try to make yourself sound as put together as possible.

"We've just grown so apart with all that's happened."

She has to stop herself from shaking, the entire world seems to be trembling until she realised it was just her.

"I don't want to say who's right or wrong. There isn't a right or wrong."

The evening chill that once held memories of cuddling under the stars is now just a sharp pierce through her skin, a blade running itself through each crevice of her beating and bleeding heart.

"We're making things difficult by blaming each other."

She bit down on her lower lip, trying to hold in the sob.

"You and I, we still care a lot for each other."

The words in her chest build up like word vomit.

"Did we have to come to this?" She whispered

"We were already coming to this."

She gasped when she felt a tug on her jacket, looking to see you buttoning up her jacket once more- your eyes filled with unshed tears as your trembling hands slowly slid each button through slit. A shaky gasp is let out as you tried not to sob, but it comes out choked as a tear falls and she couldn't stop herself. The shatter of her heart rang through the night as she feels the tear fall down her face, hot- burning a mark on her skin. She bit down on her lower lip once more, trying to stifle the sob but it still comes out and hearing your silent cries only made it harder for her to hold it in.

The dam breaks fully when she feels you pull her into a tight hug, and she knows this is the last time she'll feel your arms around hers like this so she holds on tight. The dam breaks and she sobs, loud and messy. The way you trembled had her feeling like she was going to shatter any minute. She held you as close as she could, arms tightening around your waist and hoping that maybe for the last time you two could just become one again.

"Let's not put ourselves through this again." You said softly, and she could feel your tears seep through her jacket- the jacket you buttoned for the last time.

She could only nod as she lets out a loud sob for the last time, and maybe the last thing you remember of her is the way she cries.

"Goodbye, Kokomi."

[luvhughes43]

tornado warning | nico hischier x reader

summary: every summer nico comes back home to Switzerland and resumes his fling with yn even though she knows it’s not good for her.

lyrics: "don't understand how quickly we get right back in our rhythm without missing a step, and logically the last thing i should have on my mind but i want you there sometimes"

"i guess maybe thats why im lying to my therapist, i keep saying things like "i never saw him and we never kissed"

word count: 1.1k

you and nico were kind of a thing before he moved to the us for hockey. it was the average high school relationship, hand holding and late night talks on the phone. it was never supposed to be how it is now. you weren’t together, but every time off-season hit, Nico was back in Switzerland and you were suddenly calling out for him and he was there, every single time. 

Don't understand how quickly we get

Right back in our rhythm without missing a step

And logically, the last thing I should have on my mind

But I want you there sometimes

he had just gotten back in the country less than 24 hours ago, and your mind was already reeling with how quick everything was already going. he was in your bed shirtless, arms slung around your waist as soft music played in the background. you could feel the rise and fall of his chest against your side, and you could feel his soft hair against your fingertips as you let them brush across his scalp.

“Ni?” you whispered, unsure if he had already fallen asleep.

“Yes?” he replied groggily, not bothering to move so he could look up at you.

you debated on asking him what the two of you were, what you were even doing. you knew that when he inevitably left you again at the end of the summer you would be a wreck, and despite yours, your friends, and your therapists advice, you couldn’t quit Nico. 

I guess maybe that's why 

I'm lying to my therapist

I keep saying things like 

"I never saw him and we never kissed"

your lovely therapist knew all about your relationship with Nico. It was a topic that came up regularly during your hour-long sessions. 

“I just don’t know what i’m going to do about this, like… we always fall back into how things were, and i just don’t know if i can do it anymore,” you went over your dilemma for what seemed like the hundredth time. your therapist nodded her head slowly as she listened to you once again reiterate your issues. 

she set her pen down against her notepad before looking into your eyes, “be honest, have you seen him since he came back?” she questioned and you tried to still your fidgeting. 

“No, i never saw him. I’ve just heard from friends who’ve seen him around,” you lied smoothly, shifting a little on the couch you were sitting on. If your therapist knew you had kissed him too… multiple times… you knew what she’d say. she wants you to move on but how can you when Nicos at your doorstep and is asking for you? you just can’t seem able to get over him.

I think he's onto me every time I say

"I'm over that son of a bitch"

“I am so over him,” you slur to your friends who all give each other side glances. you’ve been telling them the same thing for years, and it seemed like Nico had a sixth sense when it came to you trying to get over him. Every time you declared you were over him, he was calling or doing something to pull you right back in.

“yn honey, why don’t you-” your friend started but you eagerly cut her off.

“no like seriously this time, how dare he come back to me! like he thinks he can just come back into my life every damn time!” you practically shouted, getting up off the couch to really make your point clear. You pointed in the directions of each of your friends and continued, “next time he calls, guys i swear just take my phone and block him because i am never, and i mean never! talking to him again!” you slurred your words and your friends just nodded at your new attempt to rid yourself of Nico.

not even a minute later he was calling your phone, your ringtone blaring through the material of your jeans as you urgently fished it out. “yn who is it?” one of your friends asked as she moved to stand next to you. 

a goofy smile took over your face once you saw Nicos contact. The rest of your friends didn't even need to peek at your phone to know who was calling. “i’m just going to answer it,” you giggled a bit, pulling away from your small group of friends.

“yn no! you just said you were never going to talk to him again!” your friend jumped off the couch and rushed over to you, trying to grab your phone out of your hand before you accepted the call. 

she was too late. you shielded your phone from her and quickly accepted, smiling into the phone once you heard Nicos voice on the other end of the call.

“Ni!” you giggled into the call, all of your previous sentiments ignored the second you heard his voice asking for you to come over. all of your friends watched you walk out the door and into his car, all of them groaning when you two drove off.

I'll drive you home

You drive me crazy

But that's not gonna stop me

I'll call you out

You call me "baby"

it was nico’s last night in switzerland before he was catching a flight back to jersey. you were driving him home after a late night at your apartment, not having the urge to turn him away when he called saying he wanted to properly tell you goodbye.

“you drive me crazy, Ni” you sighed, watching him unbuckle himself out of your passenger side. 

“what are you talking about baby?” he asked, seemingly unaware of the effect his words had on you. 

“I’m not your baby” you admitted softly, turning around so you can face him full on. his brow furrowed at your words. you desperately wanted to say something to him, bring up your feelings or how conflicted you were about this whole relationship-that-wasn’t. but you guys were never the ones to sit and chat about all your feelings, so you let it all go. 

“I’m sorry, i think i’m just tired” you tried laughing it off but it sounded a little strained. 

“well we had a busy night,” Nico laughed as you felt your face heat up, turning around so he could face you properly too.

you smiled at him, painfully aware that this was the last time you’d be seeing him in months. you felt the lump grow in your throat, and you painfully swallowed it back as Nico reached for the door handle. 

Nico opened the door. he halfway outside before he seemingly realized something and leaned back inside, kissing you softly on the lips over the middle of your console. 

he pulled away too soon, and then you sat watching him walk away. The lump in your throat getting more painful with every step he took. you had no idea how you were going to get him out of your mind this time.

[tonydaddingham]

oh god OH God right so crowley's comment about the richard curtis film? just hit me that he's possibly (probably? im assuming crowley is talking about screenwriter credits here) talking about the ending of four weddings and a funeral (bold choice) and i am reeling bc if im reading into this correctly neil really is letting the narrative punches fly

so i dug through the yt archives to find the ending that id all but suppressed in my memory (andie macdowells acting in this brings me out in hives, crowley is such a hero for making it through this film) and-

right fuck it let's just basically do a basic transcript of it:

carrie: "i just wanted to check you're okay, not busy... killing yourself or anything, but you're fine so... i shouldn't have come to the church this morning. im sorry-"

charles: "no, no, wait- it was all my fault, i- i- im the bastard here! and it definitely sorted out one thing; that marriage and me are very clearly not meant for one another... sorted out another big thing as well- there i was, standing in the church and for the first time in my whole life, I realised i totally and utterly loved one person, and it wasn't the person standing next to me in the veil, it was the person standing opposite me now, in the rain."

carrie: "...is it still raining? i hadn't noticed..."

charles: "the truth of it is that i loved you from the first second i met you... you- you're not suddenly going to go away again, are you?"

carrie: "no... i might drown, but otherwise no!"

charles: "okay, okay, we'll go in... but first! let me ask you one thing... do you think that after we've dried off, after we've spent some more time together, you might agree not to marry me? a-and do you think not being married to me might be something you'll consider doing for the rest of your life?... do you?"

carrie: "...i do."

okay so now that you and me, reader, have had to suffer through that, i am just in shock that this, this, is the scene to which crowley is potentially referring. im not saying that he takes it as absolute inspiration for his romantic scenario idea, bc i think he is just covering for what is his own personal fantasy... but boy is it potentially insightful. as ive said before im fairly certain that whilst he was fascinated and amused by aziraphale, i certainly don't think he fell in love on the Wall like he would like to think, in retrospect, that he did.

so let's board this train hurtling along the rails of that particular thought (ie stick with me), crowley really seems to be deluded as to the love story he and aziraphale share... to the point that in ep2 when he makes the curtis remark, we can infer that whilst he may have been subconsciously reconciling his actual feelings of More with aziraphale for a long time, and only fully accepts and declares them in ep6, he's looked over their history as being more than it actually is. because this script? is not even close to what happened on the wall.

like, first of all - aziraphale is not at all andie/carrie (a divine mercy, truly). aziraphale is not passive, however much he plays into it with his damsel-in-distress syndrome, and certainly is not dim and virtually silent. aziraphale always has Things To Say. and crowley, until ep6, does not wax lyrical about his feelings, his innermost thoughts, and certainly not as 'poetically' (see: cheesy af) as a curtis script. in his playful moments he is an outright dork, but not like this.

now this bit? im going to be fanciful and fanfic-y, and very clumsy in how i put this across... but replace the context for a moment:

charles: "no, no, wait- it was all my fault, i- i- im the bastard here! and it definitely sorted out one thing; that belief and love for god and me are very clearly not meant for one another... sorted out another big thing as well- there i was, standing on the wall and for the first time in my whole life, I realised i totally and utterly loved/believed in? one person, and it wasn't the person standing in front of me when i fell, it was the person standing opposite me now, in the rain."

im not going to double down on the red bits, because it is ridiculous, but the vague idea? insane! insane to intimate that he replaced the void that was his belief system, the divine love he now lacks after falling, the betrayal he feels from god, with aziraphale! goodness crowley, this is not healthy, my guy! and then:

charles: "the truth of it is that i loved you from the first second i met you... you- you're not suddenly going to go away again, are you?"

no, i don't think you did, crowley bud- but you are definitely lonely. and lonely not even in the sense of isolation, but lonely in the sense of lack of purpose, possibly guilt and shame, and the inability to understand (or accept that you do understand) why you're currently in the position you're in. but aziraphale is not the replacement for that.

he's not there to fill the spaces where you're barely holding yourself together. you literally end up spending millennia apart in between your run-ins, and get along with it just fine... or maybe aziraphale does, but do you? is why you do the things you do, did what you did; because of this fear?

(when did i suddenly start addressing crowley directly, ah well i cba to rewrite)

charles: "okay, okay, we'll go in... but first! let me ask you one thing... do you think that after we've dried off, after we've spent some more time together, you might agree not to marry me? a-and do you think not being married to me might be something you'll consider doing for the rest of your life?... do you?"

the arrangement? aziraphale be in crowley's company all the time, stop him feeling lonely and make him feel wanted, but not commit to anything more than crowley can handle?

all im saying is that i hope noone dares show crowley the confession from julia roberts in notting hill without giving him a bottle of talisker and a litre of häagen-dazs first 💀

[irusanw4]

Gonna listen to every single Jhariah song in his music playlist on youtube. Thoughts on them as I go. This might be rather repetitive lol

Debt Collector was very funky. It got me wigglin in my chair

Needed a Change of Pace is fun, I like its vibes. I like the whoa thingy in the chorus a lot it's very satisfying. Also the visual effects are odd /pos!

Knives Are Dangerous, Kid, So Cut The Theatrics starting strong. OOH THE SECOND VERSE SOUNDS REALLY NICE. OOOOH. I'm loving the sound of this a lot. Ok song over that fucked hard

PRESSURE BOMB!!!! time! Jaw dropping 480p pahsduiohasdjasd! Oh man this looks so cool and sounds really funky! BOY UR HAIR S ON FIRE ok no moer ig. Why are there so many zppers on his pants. Chorus osunds soooo nice ::) I like the way it swings back and forth? If that makes sense. I'm also done fixing my typos. OOOOH what's this..? MARCHING BAND BEHIND HIM AND THE MARCHING BAND SOUNDS OOOOOOOO nooooo not ur scooter ::(!!

SPLIT! is that chonny jash reference. OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH IM LOVING THIS ALREADY. OK THIS IS AWFUL CCCC OF HIM BUT ALSO IT FUCKS SO HARD! Is that braille. OOUGH PRECHORUS ILY! AUGHHHHH CHORUS STABBING ME I LOVE THE WAY THE WORDS ARE SAID!!!!!! Dude these lyric videos are so creative?! Ok that was AWESME

Whose Eye Is It Anyway??? I've heard good things about this one I think. TEH WAY MY JAW DROPPED AT THE CHORUS?!??!?! Is that French. THE WORDPLAYYYYYYYY ILY WORDPLAY ILY WORDPLAY!!!!! ok so we're 7 songs in and ww might be losing his place as my second fave artist when I'm in a cj mood??? OUGH CHORUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I could def see myself getting into a specifically Jhariah mood from what I've seen!!! That song was AWESOMES!!!!

To Take For Granted. It/its and they/them pronouns fire emoji fire emoji fire emoji!!!! I like the instrumental in this first part! Ooooooh this is getting funky /vpos! Ok this took a few but I'm liking it a good bit now ::3! OUGH WHAT IS JHARIAH I JUST INSTANTLY TEARED UP AND MY JAW DROPPED AFTER THE SONG CAME BACK IN!

Not So Bad, it's seeming funky. sorry i'm still reeling from the end of to take for granted lols. like this one ::3 thinking I need to take a break after song 10 so I don't die of awesome music tho

The Great Tale Of How I Ruined It All is starting super strong I love it so far! I like how he pronounces words, even when I only process half of it I can usually figure out what the syllables I struggled with are from a little logicing out ::3. Oooooooooooh DUDE THIS IS SO GOODS???? I HAD TO TAKE A SECOND TO JUST LISTEN NO TYPIGN OUGH THE DELIVERRY FOF THE LINES this is??? OUGH! I love this song for sures

And now I take a break from Jhariah so I don't keel over dead. This'll resume after I've had some stimming time.

[thewizardprincessau]

hey. dont cry. dissection of the passerine animatic + the accompanying character study ok? ok.

tldr: my son chun tao she is so fucking ill

Honestly Passerine is THE Chun Tao song. To me. bc it fits really well with his religious guilt, but i also like to recontextualize the chorus to instead be him talking about eri. they were the one really pulling the weight during the early days of their friendship, and chun tao feels a lot of guilt for that

but first! the animatic! it centers around chun tao's guilt for eri being so sweet to him despite him being a stoic ass cold bitch. i actually color-picked the palette from the album cover of eurus (that passerine is from) and slapped on a noise filter to achieve that same grainy effect. it looks nice 2 me.

eri is represented in a distinguishing yellow, someone bright and unique to chun tao, while he himself is colored in the same white as all the other details in the background. While making him the same color as the lyrics helped establish they were His thoughts, him blending in w everything else while eri has their own unique color is his way of putting eri on a pedestal, viewing them as more important than he'll ever be. they're the monarch and he's just their prince consort. that's how he always thought of it.

i dont have much to say about these frames in particular but here are their corresponding parts in the study! theyre just meant to establish their relationship w one another before leading up to the next part, where he sees eri as this blinding light, but just cant let go of that one sign of weakness they had shown him during their wedding. a small glimpse of a them he didnt quite understand yet, and never made the effort to.

at some point, chun tao Snaps and berates eri for trying to get so close to him. at first i wasnt sure if his mindset made.. sense? but connecting the dots from earlier, it DOES make sense if you see it through the point of view that he sees eri as someone above him. chun tao isnt someone who deals with people and he's used to impersonal business relationships and he thought this would be another one of those which is why he's so shocked, caught off-guard, even offended at eri threatening his status quo. brother hates vulnerability, and it terrified him that someone was trying to get through his walls, so all he could do was lash out.

im not absolving eri of blame either though.. i think they still had some wrong in not immediately recognizing chun tao's boundaries. they were so eager to be her friend, they dont realize they might come across as overbearing. and they were, in a sense, but chun tao does also realize its unfair to them to take their innocent gestures of friendliness with so much malice. they just have conflicting ideas on the world, and it clashed, and no one's totally wrong but no one's totally right, they were just coming from their own places.

In here chun tao watches as eri reels back and apologizes for all the things she had shouted at them at. but it's also the same moment chun tao realizes that she does Not know much of anything about eri at all. it's very faint, but there's the outline of a sobbing younger eri staring straight at the screen, supposedly at chun tao, like a reminder of the eri she never got to meet herself. one that was hurting just like her. and that younger eri still resides in the one standing before her crying too, she just never got to see that side to them because she never bothered to figure that side to them out. (AND the "your" is intentionally written twice, like its referring to both eri in the present and eri in the past. by failing to understand them, chun tao feels like he's failing both eris.)

as mentioned earlier, chun tao gets mad at eri for having a "perfect life" and thinks theyd never understand her. but. the thing is. chun tao isnt LETTING them understand her. she keeps pushing them away. and she realizes it was presumptuous to assume they would understand her, because well. she.. doesnt even know what eri's Been through atp. she just assumed eri's life's been perfect because theyre so composed and chipper, but she didnt know who they were a couple years ago at all. she thinks that bc eri's secret relationship is lovey-dovey that their love is perfect, but chun tao didn't see their toxic yuri of a start and that they face a lot of problems as a couple too. chun tao thinks that bc eri is so well-loved by the public that thats that, but she remembers that people gossiped AND gossip hard about them bc of their status as a non-sorcerer. they were dehumanized and alienated by the public too, just like her. and this realization hits her HARD.

he then tries to make an effort to be more involved in eri's life after this point, reconciling with them and becoming their best friend. okay tbh the scene described in the character study is NOT the same as the one pictured in the animatic but i HAD to get a hug in there somewhere.

the last two scenes are a BIG flashforward to ursa's creation, where chun tao is panicking hard about eri literally dying to create their homunculus baby. also ursa is drawn in white but has eri's yellow present too, showing how he's a combination of them, their little kid :D

the whole lyric bit of "but i cant shake this feeling that i was only pushing the spear into your side, again and again and again" is supposed to represent chun tao feeling like a thorn on eri's side causing them pain. he scolded them for being nice to him, and they went on to sacrifice their life in a dangerous ritual to create their son and uphold tradition, but he just feels so so guilty for all of that. he cant shake the feeling that he's a source of their pain and suffering, and it eats him up alive.

-----------------------------------

ok ANYWAY moving on to the CHARACTER STUDY NOW!!!!!!!!!! just parallels and stuff w the writing

guys im a fucking feature writer of course im going to start and end with the same phrase ("chun tao is not a people peson, and his family knows this very well"). chun tao refers to two different families in the opening and closing segments: in the first he refers to his biological family, and in the second its about the family he found and made in quiro. both his families knows he struggles with social interactions, and his bio family (his cousins) make fun of him for it, so he goes on to detail how he views social interactions as a system, a formula he understands. his family in quiro instead tries to HELP him get better at it, and he instead recognizes that social interactions are something personal that require heart and genuine investment (shown in how he notes that ursa cares about him deeply), even moving past his frozen style of speech with the mention of jokes. tldr he's fucking cringefail at socializing and his bio family called him cringe but his chosen family said he's cringe but free. what

Perfect life/love/reputation. At first he hates eri for having these "perfect" things and thinks theyre sooo happy because of it, but later on realizes that their life isnt perfect and neither is his, but he finds joy in what he has anyway :)

the repeated mention of chun tao saying he'd never fall in love with eri bc he's so stuck in his rigid view of romance, but later comes to love eri as his best friend AND love his found family too :'3

chun tao wondering earlier if she should try to emulate eri's pleasantries, and ends up doing so later down the line! both lines have the same structure with the "quick greeting + smile despite being tired"

"Ahia" is Chinese for the eldest brother and it's also used to refer to children to know their birth order. Chun Tao calling Ursa this is an acknowledgement of him going to be a big brother soon! tbh in my head thats what the meeting eri called for is about but its just my headcanon (<== SAID THE ONE WRITING THE STORY)

ALSO i dont have screenshots to show but eri is only intentionally mentioned by name in the flashforward, to show how back then chun tao only saw them as THE princess/monarch but eventually comes to recognize them as eri, his bestie :3

oh my god i. think thats it? good god. might add onto this if i remember more but. thank you for entertaining my insanity why is this 1400+ words I NEED TO EAT BRUNCH

[person4924]

i'd LOVE to hear explanations to why you assigned which folklore song to which character (not that i need to be convinced that u're right, i already know it, but i love hearing people's opinions about taylor swift songs and their connections to fictional characters)

Yes! i would love to explain (this is going to be really long)

this is me trying - remus lupin

i feel like this could be any one of them, but mostly remus. "i've been having a hard time adjusting, i had the shiniest wheels, now their rusting" in my head, when he first came to hogwarts he still had hope and was excited, because he was magical and he still had a lot of energy to do his work, but then eventually he got burnt out and the prank happened and everything came crashing down. "and my words shoot to kill when im mad, i have a lot of regrets about that" i hc that he has anger issues, and would blow up on his friends a lot and obviously that would be triggering to sirius, so he would have a lot of regrets and self-hatred because of it. "i was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere. i fell behind all my classmates and i ended up here" again with the hc he was ahead of his class for so long and then he eventually fell back and lost hope after the prank "its hard to be anywhere these days when all i want is you. your a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town." i feel like this could be after the prank or after sirius gets put in azkaban. with the azkaban its hard because everyone hates sirius black, "they were a deatheater, who betrayed their best friends" so it would be hard when remus knows that sirius is innocent. and i think that one winter sirius stayed with remus and his mom in remus's hometown and they went to the movies, so it brings back up memories from that winter. there are also more lyrics that remind me of him but those are just the big 4.

mirrorball - james and pandora

"i know they said the end is near but i'm still on my tallest tiptoes spinning in my highest love, shining just for you." i think that during the war, dora and james were really stressed out and scared, but they felt like they had to stay calm and collected and be the one everyone could count on and they still had to be perfect for everyone and their partners. "i can change everything about me to fit in" i think that both of them are masters at masking, panda can change everything about themself (and did) to try and fit it, same with jams, they both had to mask so much and all they wanted was to fit in and be loved "im still a believer but i don't know why. ive never been a natural, all i do is try, try, try." i think this one kind of explains itself, but james and dora both always believed that everything would end up okay, it would all work out in the end, for them and their friends, and they both always did, no matter what. even when it was so clear it wouldn't end up okay, they still believed. and the natural part also goes back to the masking and how they've both never been naturals at anything and had to try really hard for everything people thought of when they thought about them. someone thought they were smart and grades came easily to them? no, not at all, they had to try so hard for all of it.

my tears ricochet - reggie (it said dora too but ive decided its more reggie than dora (its still very dora tho too))

"I didn't have it in myself to go with grace. And you're the hero flying around, saving face. And if I'm dead to you, why are you at the wake?" he didnt have it in him to die as a deatheater, following voldemorts orders (with grace), he didnt have it in him. and the other 2 lines are him talking to sirius. saying 'youll be known as the hero and i'll always be the villain. if you hate me, why are you standing at my grave?' because once sirius saw that reggie got the mark they said they hated him and they didnt see him as a brother anymore (they were lying) "and i can go anywhere i want, anywhere i want, but just not home." i think this one is kinda self explanatory "And I still talk to you (when I'm screaming at the sky) (1) And when you can't sleep at night (you hear my stolen lullabies) (2)" 1: once siri found out that reg had gotten the mark, they said they hated reg and didnt see him as a brother (they were lying) but of course they stopped talking to reg, so reg would stay up at the astronomy tower and talk to the sirius star as if it was his sibling (and before he went into the cave) 2: i hc that when ever their parents would curse siri or lock them in the basement, etc. then reggie would find them after once they went back to their room and would sing siri to sleep "you had to kill me, but it killed you just the same. cursing my name, wishing i stayed. you turned into your worst fears" um this is also reggie to siri, basically saying 'you had to kill me (by not helping me), but it killed you all the same (the guilt of not being able to help reggie, kill them).' you turned into your worst fears: when siri was in azkaban they convinced themselves that they did do it, it was easier that way, and in turn they turned into their worst fears, their parents, someone who lied and hurt people, a horrible person.

hoax - regulus black

"Screaming, "Give me a reason" (1). Your faithless love's the only hoax I believe in. Don't want no other shade of blue but you. No other sadness in the world would do (2)" 1: james was the only person regulus confided in with his plans with the cave and james told him "no. your not doing that no. theres other ways, you can join the order, you can do anything. no." getting more and more desperate. regulus screamed "give me a reason! give me a reason i can't james, there isn't one, this is the only way i can help" 2: regulus didn't believe in love, but james love was the only hoax he believed in, he didn't think true love existed, but james's was the closest one could get to true love "you know the hero died, so whats the movie for? (1) you knew it still hurt under my scars, from when they pulled me apart. you knew the password, so i let you in the door. (2)" 1: when james died, he was the hero in reg's eyes 2: 'you knew the password, so i let you in the door' when reg first met james it was first year and they got introduced by siri on the train, and as a defense mechanism he would be mean and rude to everyone he met and so he was to james, but james being the nicest person in the world saw straight through him ("they see right through me, can you see right through me? i see right through me") and so he consistently talked to reg and he "knew the password to the door" and the door symbolizes reg's defense mechanisms and emotional barriers, so he let james thru them

invisible string - lilydora

"and isnt it just so pretty to think, that all along there was some invisible string, tying you to me?" it's basically canon that dora is incredibly romantic, and would always find rocks they think lily would like and give them to her and would definitely have said this to lily at least once, when they were playing with her hair in bed "gold was the color of the leaves when i showed you around centennial park" during the summers the entire group would go on camping trips to cornwall and during one of the camping trips just them two would goto a park and walk through and people watch. also just this entire song is about them but i just chose the two that are easiest to explain

the 1 - marylene

so first i hc that marylene dated in like 3rd or 4th year. and that marlene liked mary first from 2nd year thru 3rd year, but eventually accepted nothing was going to happen but then towards the end of 3rd year, mary started to like marlene too (once marlene was over her) and then one drunken night at truth or dare it was revealed that they both liked eachother (marlene being liked and mary being like) and so they decided to try and date, but it didnt work out and they broke up, and eventually moving on to their respective partners. so it was like right person, wrong time, which is what i think this song is about "but we were something, dont you think so?" i think that mary probably said something like this to marlene at some point, once they were both in other relationships and they were talking about when they dated saying like 'we were something weren't we? too bad it didn't work out' "but it would've been fun, if you wouldve been the one." this is more something that went unspoken between the two, 'it would've been fun if you would've been the one, your my best friend, why couldn't we have been more?'

cardigan - wolfstar

i feel like this has been widely accepted as the wolfstar song "vintage tee, brand new phone (remus) // sequin smile, black lipstick (sirius)" "And when I felt like I was an old cardigan, under someone's bed, you put me on and said I was your favorite" basically remus felt unloved and whenever he would, sirius would tell him hes loved and would make him feel loved. "But I knew you, playing hide-and-seek and giving me your weekends" the one winter break when they both stayed at hogwarts for it and they would play hide in seek around the castle. "you drew stars around my scars" THIS ONE. this one is so widely talked about, sirius drew stars around remus's scars. figuratively and literally. BUT with that being said, sirius has scars too. i think that once when sirius was bored they drew stars around moony's scars and it became a thing for them, whenever one of them was feeling insecure or anything, they would draw stars around eachothers scars. "cause i knew you stepping on the last train." the last time they got on the train to go home from hogwarts, they knew eachother, more than they would've expected when they got on the first train to go to hogwarts in first year. "The smell of smoke would hang around this long (1). 'Cause I knew everything when I was young. I knew I'd curse you for the longest time (2)." 1: i think that one time siri gave remus their (leather) jacket becaue remus was cold, and from then on remus just kept it, forever. and no matter what rem did to it, it would always smell of cigarettes, even when sirius was dead. 2: remus knew everything when he was young, he knew he'd love siri till the day he died, and he would always curse sirius for that, why did he have to love them? no matter what, he would always love sirius black, and he would always curse them for it.

the last great american dynasty - marlene mckinnon (ik it said lily but i changed my mind)

"they say she was seen on occasion pacing the rocks, staring out at the midnight sea" thinking about regulus (that was my attempt at a joke) "and in a feud with her neighbor, she stole his dog and died him keylime green" this is the most marlene thing ever "there goes the loudest woman this town has ever seen, i had a marvelous time ruining everything" marlene was the louded, most opinionated person anyone knew, and they had a marvelous time ruining everything.

exile - jegulus

"so step right out, there is no amount of crying i can do for you" whenever reggie would open up to james, he would cry himself to sleep. "i never learned to read your mind (you never learned to read my mind). i couldn't turn things around (you couldn't turn things around) cause you never gave me a warning sign (i gave so many signs)" james is bon iver in this and reggie is taylor (the parenthesis). as close as james got, he could never read reg's mind, he could never fully see throught the mask he put up. and as hard as james tried to stop reg from going in the cave, to turn him around, he couldn't. and as many times reg tried to talk to james, to give him a sign, james never thought he was serious (sirius), he thought he'd changed reg's mind. he hadn't.

seven - sirius black

"and thought i can't recall your face, i still got love for you." once sirius got put in azkaban, faces started to get blurry. they remembered people who they loved with everything but they couldn't remember their voices or faces, just blurry memories of laughter and happiness. "and ive been meaning to tell you, i think your house is haunted. your dad is always mad and that must be why. and i think you should come live with me and we can be pirates, and then you wont have to cry or hide in the closet." james 100% said this to sirius at some point in 1st or 2nd year, when james was still innocent and didn't know what was really going on. the closet part could be taken literally like how sirius would hide in the closet and try to get away from their parents, or it could be taken as they had to go in the closet and hide their gender and sexuality from their parents.

august - just the marauders era in general, or it could apply to any of the ships

"but i can see us lost in the memory, august slipped away into a moment in time." with the hc that they went to cornwall every summer starting in 4th year, they would go in august. and they would always look back on those memories. "back when we were still changing for the better, wanting was enough, for me it was enough. to live for the hope of it all." back when they were still young and hopeful and just living for the fun of it, not worried about wars or death, just being kids. and this entire song just gives cornwall vibes, and shoutout to grant chapman also.

illicit affairs - jegulus

"Make sure nobody sees you leave. Hood over your head, keep your eyes down, tell your friends you're out for a run. You'll be flushed when you return." SECRET JEGULUS SECRET JEGULUS!! james would do this like twice or 3 times a week and say he was out for a run for quidditch "you showed me colors i couldn't see with anyone else" james showed regulus hope and love, two things he's never seen before (except from sirius, but its different). "look at this idiotic fool you made me. you taught be a secret language, i can't speak with anyone else." regulus never really knew how to express love, until james, he would always express it in the little things, and james knew that so they kinda developed their own love language "and you know damn well for you, i would ruin myself a million little times." i dont have much reasoning for this, it just gives jegulus vibes idk

mad woman - all the girls

in my head, all of the girls (girls just meaning like dorcas, marlene, mary, pandora, emmeline and lily, so using it loosely since not all of them are girls but i couldn't think of another word) were all very angry, like they just had anger seeped into their bones, because of all the discrimination and pressure and expectations put on them, just like how i believe all AFABs are build with pain and sadness built into their bones. so i just think every lyric of this song describes that pain and anger they all have.

epiphany - the war

"keep your helmet, keep your life son. just a flesh wound, here's your rifle" i feel like this is kinda like dumbledores attitude towards everyone in dumbledores in his army thing. like basically saying 'oh thats not that bad of a wound (their trauma and nervousness towards the war) and then handing them a gun (or wand in their case) and telling them to fight. "'doc i think shes crashing out' and some things you just can't speak about." i feel like this is how a lot of them felt as they watched all their friends die, when they find their body on the battlefield, or the hc that sirius found james and lily dead on the floor, some things you just can't talk about. "only twenty minutes to sleep, but you dream of some kind of epiphany. just one single glimpse of relief, to make sense of what you've seen." i like to think that when one of them died they would all meet up as ghosts or wtv and become ghosts at hogwarts and play pranks for eternity (its canon stfu) and they would visit whoever else was still alive in their dreams and they would visit mary every night (once she obliviated herself) and she would think it was so weird how these people (who seemed familiar) kept coming to her in her dreams.

betty - wolfstar/the prank

"the worst thing i ever did was what i did to you" this is the only thing sirius could think to say to remus other than im sorry "i'm only 17 i don't know anything, but i know i miss you" even though sirius knew this was the worst thing they could've ever done to remus, they missed him like hell. and even though remus wanted to and tried so hard to hate sirius, he never could. "the only thing i want to do is make it up to you" sirius tried so hard to make it up to remus in every possible way, saying their sorry, letting him yell at them, doing all remus's homework, they were willing to let remus hit them, anything.

peace - dorlene

"I never had the courage of my convictions. As long as danger is near, and it's just around the corner, darling. Cause it lives in me. No, I could never give you peace" marlene could never give dorcas peace, they couldn't ever be still, could never stay in one place, have a family, they just couldn't, they would never be able to give dorcas peace, but dorcas loved them anyway. "And you know that I'd swing with you for the fences, Sit with you in the trenches, Give you my wild, give you a child" dorcas wasn't a violent person, they liked to keep peace and be nice to everyone, unless there was a reason not to. but they would do anything for marlene. anything. give them a family, throw as many swings as possible, anything. "family that i chose, now that i see your brother as my brother" marlene's family were a bunch of shitholes, so they found their own family, dorcas's. dorcas's mom was their mom, their brother was their brother.

omg thats it (this totally didnt take me 3 days)! it was fun to write though, thank you so much for asking

[hyuckmov]

hiii moon anon here i have a lot to say but first off: i've been analyzing the title song settle down and i've been listening to it over and over again and is the story gonna parallel the lyrics itself?? "and i don't seem to be having any effect now" like thats… oooh the angst is gonna be delicious. i hope you take this as a compliment when i say this but the whole fic takes me BACK to 2013-2015 YOU KNOW THAT ERA HAHAHA the tropes, the ambiance, the CHARACTERS!! side question: is mark or jisung gonna play bigger roles? or did they just act as plot devices for reader and haechans development. would not mind either way but given the concept of the story i can totally imagine reader coming back and just wreaking havoc on the band. sorry i love mess lol. maybe i'm delusional or maybe its the fact that it's haechan but it makes me more understanding of the character?? i trust you when you say that there's more to rockstar hc than meets the eye, and especially from his perspective it's pretty realistic that he has his guard up when it comes to really connecting with people, and we see his walls slowly crumbling down by the end too. and even in the earlier parts of the story i didn't expect him to have his sweet moments?? i honestly expected him to be worse but god him calling her PRINCESS has me on my knees i will defend reader's choices with my life because i'd do the same, i'd probably still go to the concert by the end she's so much stronger than me helppp (tho DISCLAIMER i would not be doing this for just any man its bc its haechan why i am easily swayed by the little things,,, just like reader), but i liked how she decided to take a step back this time, especially when at that point haechan is basically offering her what she has always wanted, but knowing his past actions it won't be truly easy to hang onto every word said. this is the culmination of every mixed signals and rejection that haechan gave her, and the build up to it is veryyy well done. also im still reeling from reading the fic i felt sooo many emotions and dk how to fully articulate it yet,, maybe i'll come back when i do. i even made a playlist of my own w songs that reminded me of the fic to help me move on (at least until pt 2 gets posted, cant wait tho!!)

MOON ANON.... when i say my jaw dropped.... my heart rate actually spiked i can't believe you wrote such a detailed review and theorized this makes me so happy especially since you basically inspired me with this idea !!!! giving you a huge hug rn 🫂🤍 

omg ngl this fic encouraging people to listen to settle down makes me so happy because it's one of my favorite songs 😭 it makes me feel so honoured to know that you are analysing the lyrics and anticipating the plot like that really means so much to me !!! i definitely picked it because it had themes i wanted to explore throughout the song...but the lines kind of contain both hyucks and readers pov hehe so i'm excited to explore that in part 2

i take that as a DEFINITE COMPLIMENT i was so invested in that era it was so formative for me... hence a lot of the song choice in my playlist too... i don't know if i genuinely nailed the idea of rockstar in rockstar haechan (because truly...what is a rockstar...) but i did want to give it that 2013 band on tumblr vibe lmfao so i'm so glad you brought that up !!!!

AAAA the band still definitely continues to play a role... they have stuff to work out but i've thought about their characters a lot and i definitely want to show more of their opinions on haechan and reader (it wouldn't be a rockstar au without that). someone else i want to add in is jaemin because ngl reader needs someone purely on her side

i hope i'm not promising too much with haechan HAHA i'm not someone who likes to give too much backstory to characters so i'm just putting it out there: i'm not going to explain that he's this way becaue he was cheated on before or he had family problems etc. i just want it to be genuine layers of his character and personality that's put to the test (love making it hard for myself LOL)

i'm so relieved to know you still managed to feel for his character and appreciate the softer sides of him and a bit of his struggle... i was worried i promised a super terrible character with the preview and people would be disappointed he ended up being so gentle with reader 😅

and her standing him up at the end!!! i'm glad you thought it was justified but at the same time recognise she probably was going to...it really could go both ways and idk if i'm still going through with my original plot arc !!! we will see :)

this was already so articulate omg once i appreciate it sooo so so so much that you shared such a detailed review with me, it literally blows my mind and i will reread your ask again and again !!!! omg and if u want please share your playlist with me too!!! i want to see what songs there are that give him vibes ~~

thank you sm again...you are too nice to me ily!!!!

[cosmicallyavg]

3 questions:

Which part of writing do you struggle with most?

Do you listen to music while you write? If so, share a song that’s been inspiring you lately.

Do you prefer to write AUs, canon divergence, or canon-compliant fic?

which part of writing do you struggle with most?

hmmm a lot of times i struggle with opening/closing lines? like i have the idea of how i want the story to start/begin but writing that grabber line is always so hard!!! and for what!!! like especially the opener, you want to reel your readers in, so for me i put a lot of pressure on myself to come up with something really good. as for the closer, theres less pressure? because the reader has already made it to the end, i don't need to worry about hooking them, but you do still want your ending line to leave the reader wanting more, while also feeling as though the story has been concluded in a successful way. but every time i struggle with both of them 😩😩 but everything in-between usually comes pretty easily as long as im having a good writing brain day

do you listen to music while you write? if so, share a song that's been inspiring you lately.

sometimes i do, sometimes i dont? it depends on how my brain is functioning on that particular day. like today im writing and am listening to music just fine, but some days my brain cannot handle coming up with words while also hearing different words in my ears.

as for songs that are inspiring me right now 👀 love in the dark by adele is the song that im using a lyric from as the title for the fic im working on 👀👀👀 the whole song itself is also sort of inspo for the fic but it's mainly just the one lyric

do you prefer to write AUs, canon divergence, or canon-compliant fic?

i like to write stuff that is ambiguously canon divergent and canon-compliant???? like.. this could take place in canon but more than likely it didnt. that the canon story could pick up just fine right after where my fic takes place because it doesnt introduce anything that doesnt align with canon? if that makes sense??? so i guess in a way that just means my ideas are 100% canon divergent, it's just that in my head they are canon-compliant because i said so kjdfhskjdfhjdsf

fic author questions <3

[essiekuko]

faking it til u make it is so real. i may not even be that tall at 5'6, but i jst pretend like im tall yk. i live in a place where ppl are naturally very tall. and i love just being tall ig, fashion models are tall, and they're my icons. plus, being tall basically means u can 3at more than shorter ppl, so to kind of make up for e4t1ng, i just remind myself that im tall. i 4te like straight after my 24h f4st, and i f4st3d so nobody can tell me nothing. at least i hit 24h lmfao. and its not even that serious as time goes on. i had under my usual safe intake of 800cal, cause i had 750cal, and thats prettyyy normal for me. and ik its not going to give me a big wg. im content with how things are going for me, i've finally found my balance point. if i have something, like a m3al, i practice 0m4d, which is what i just did. i only have something to 3at after a day and a day is my minimum of f4st1ng, it helps me, cause my body empties everything out, keto happens, and yea my body just sits around waiting for f00d. its not like im g41n1ng. but obv, u cant stay in the same place for the rest of ur life, and i have my goals of increasing my f4sts length, one at a time. yk, you'll have to f0rce f33d me if u ever want to see me 34t1ng :3

the difference between 3dtwt and 3dblr for me is like. my first introduction to 3d social media was 3dblr, and on 3dblr, there's not a large community here, people tend to keep to themselves and because of that there's not a whole lot of content to see. plus the insane censoring u have to do to bypass getting termed. so i had to work with what little content/info/tips i could get on 3dblr and teach myself everything abt it. then i go onto 3dtwt for the first time, just to see what the hype is. i dont like twt generally, because its so complex and the user base is so big u feel like u get no space to urself, and also due to the large amount of content being so overwhelming. i taught myself all the little 3d keywords like "h0n3ym00n ph4se", "0m4d" and all the abbrev. of goals like cw, gw, lw, etc. i interpreted it how i wanted, taught myself the meanings, and just used my own opinions on what they could mean. and im glad i have 3dblr to fuel my 3d, cause i got to teach myself and not be handed all the tips on a platter to my disposal if i had 3dtwt, i had to make my own tips. and yeah, i taught myself my own rules, and it gave me the sense of control i needed. besides, twt is so confusing, so i keep to myself on that website anyway, in my own little corner, avoiding all the big heated topics and what not. like a ghost basically, i come and i go

and its insane how popular it is. i search for 'honeymoon' first, so i can get to the honeymoon lyrics bot (i love the lyrics bots sm) and then the first search i get recommended is 'honeymoon ph4se' lmfao. and it makes me feel like, "honeymoon ph4se..... i havent heard that in a loooooong time.....🚬🚬🚬"

im surprised god knows i tried isn't a popular lana song. it seems like it would be, and i tend to like her more catchy songs over the slow songs you'd typically expect to be the underrated ones. i saw this reel a while back, where the scenario was of someone meeting a lana fan, and they're about to tell them their favorite lana song, and the person on the other end guesses with all of her most popular songs. and god knows i tried wasn't one of them?? i feel for that one sm and relate to it the most out of any main-era lana song probably (excluding aka because that's not considered main-era lana, since it's pretty obvious she went under a different name at that time)

the themes of music to watch boys to is so close to aka. i love the lana songs where she can still pull lore from what was sung in aka. music to watch boys to is so close to mermaid motel and the unreleased trash magic/miss america. and i love the lyrics in it too, like i've said before, there's deep meaning behind lana's lyrics that are short, small and simple. she paints a larger picture with just keywords

i've only rt like 3 different lana lyrics from the bots of aka, honeymoon and btd/paradise ep. and that's probably all i'll ever post, i only needed some simple posts to help decorate my page that i dont intend on rlly posting on anyway. even my ghost accs need decoration. that was my intention with my main, just having a pretty profile and pretty rbs to decorate my profile

OKAY SOMEBODY NEEDS TO START PAYING THAT ONE AUTHOR CAUSE THEY'RE CARRYING THE ENTIRE TAG 😭😭😭

i go check back on it like once a week and then i see consecutive posts all made day after day by the same person like......

they're gonna get tired of it soon others need to step up fr!! 😥

ok the THING abt 3dtwt is that, like, theres sm content and sm idk...easy romanticisation? and, like, with 3d ur obviously strugging, and u cant just lie to urself that ur not struggling and in some deep sh1t, and if anyones gotta know that, the first person to know must be u, the one with the 3d. i dont prefer 3dtwt bc posts are so simple to understand its almost like 3d content creators are explaining their tips to a child. theres pretty pictures and emoji headers everywhere, and someone who just realised they had 3d symptoms or a newcomer to the 3d community would appreciate that simplicity. but ik from experience 3d isnt that simple. its a disorder, everyones fvcked up, and some find beauty or solace in it to cope. im most likely just saying this cause i had to teach myself how to deal with my own disorder and the rest of 3dtblr was so distant, so the simplicty of 3dtwt isn't something i can appreciate bc i dont need it. im used to the mystery surrounding 3d posts, and the only reason why tblr 3d content gotta be elusive is cause of the terming and stuff. and it gets confusing and lonely, having a mental illness, so i like how hard it is to understand 3dblr, it just seems like i fit right in. the mass of content on 3dtwt makes it seem so much more inviting and welcoming, when in reality 3dtwt is more brutal than 3dblr. u gotta remember that 3d is a disorder, messed up and none of it is pretty. ofc both social medias romanticise 3ds, and i just personally like how tblr does it, cause it can tie into the dark coquette image that tblr is known for, like the famous tumblr girl image, and the mystery/stigma surrounding 3ds

2nd hand embarrassment is so bad

beat me and tell me that noone will love me, better than u do xx

omfg. yall.. im in some deep sh1t rn. im trying to sing all the aka lyrics i can before i face my problems lord pls

imagine being loud but not fvked up. and then being quiet and not fvked up. imagine just being not fcked up in general

ok theres a chance i had under 700cal today. like 600cal. but im not gonna act like i didnt 34t today lmfao.

the way i reply to nookazon reviews vs traderie reviews is lmfao. on nookazon i write out think pieces, cause ppl be writing heartfelt reviews. its like "thank u SO much for ur UNDERSTANDING, CARE, APPRECIATION" and then on traderie if u even get a message along with a review, i just be replying with emojis 😭

ok this is SO NOT ultraviolence....

i hv to say its not ultraviolence girl. call em up asap 😥

listening to 2010s pop, alt and r&b helps me feel older. cause when i was younger, all the teens in my life loved that music, cause it was what was popular in the 2010s, when they were teens and i was younger and looked up at them. now im a teen, nobody to look up to, so i go back listening to music they did. i need to know what it means to be a teen, since all the teenagers i've since met in my life have grown up, and left me behind the day i finally caught up to them, and realised they were already gone. i listen to the music that the teens i've known in my life liked, to feel like a teen too. and i've always liked this music cause i grew up with it being around them, now i've gotten to the age they were when this was popular, and i can enjoy it like they did now that i no longer have to look up at them, but directly eye to eye

it's making more sense why i post like its still the 2010s. about pop culture from over 6 years ago, that has already passed. maybe to feel like they did

[rinsoap]

˚ ༘ ♡⋆｡˚ ﾐ fukurodani and nekoma's favourite artists!

✿²˖ ࣪ ➣ includes : kenma kozume. kuroo tetsuro. akaashi keiji. bokuto koutaro.

note : PLS TELL ME Y'ALL SEE THE INFLUENCE THEY HAVE ON EACH OTHERRRR!!! im so obsessed with them :((((

KENMA KOZUME:

!!? mac demarco FIEND. he's listened to the entire nine hours of one wayne G, that's how serious he is. when the rumour that mac was gonna retire got big, he literally fell to his knees with his hands in his hair. he was so mad when he got big on tiktok oh my god i just know this mf is always complaining about the "tiktokification" of mac demarco like omg its never that serious.

his favourite songs by mac demarco are:

★ 20200819 she gets the gold star on the one wayne G album.

★ moonlight on the river on the this old dog album.

★ still together on the 2 album.

!!? after careful consideration, i have decided he is a consistent steve lacy enjoyer. he found him from 911 / mr. lonely by tyler, the creator and he's been a loyal fan ever since. let me tell you he was HERE for his 2021 era where he was smashing phones and testing the crowd bc why are you spending hundreds on a concert and you don't even know the lyrics to the artist's most popular song? gtfoooo 😭🫵🏽

his favourite songs by steve lacy are:

★ give you the world on the gemini rights album.

★ only if on the apollo XXI album.

★ infrunami on the the lo-fis album.

⌗ HONOURABLE SONG MENTIONS: thinkin bout you by frank ocean. about you by the 1975. better in the dark by tv girl. charcoal baby by blood orange. sdp interlude by travis scott.

KUROO TETSURO:

!!? he really likes mainstream rap so yeah, he's a drake listener... he's not too weird about it at least, he's just into music that hypes him up that's all!!! thinks drake won the beef solely based on vibes and intuition because he did Not keep up with it. let me tell you, he was shocked when kenma explained the beef in full detail with a powerpoint and a clicker 😭 it was a whole intervention.

his favourite songs by drake are:

★ summers over interlude on the views album.

★ 8am in charlotte on the for all the dogs album.

★ portland on the more life album.

!!? on that mainstream rap note, he is also a travis scott frequenter. of course him and bokuto made kenma and akaashi do the sicko mode trend with them in 2018 WHO DO YOU THINK THEY ARE?! he had a phase that quickly died out after a couple of months but it came back when SOS by SZA came out and oikawa played him open arms ft travis.

his favourite songs by travis scott are:

★ I KNOW ? on the UTOPIA album.

★ 3500 (ft. future & 2chainz) on the rodeo album.

★ STOP TRYING TO BE GOD on the ASTROWORLD album.

⌗ HONOURABLE SONG MENTIONS: REEL IT IN by aminé. backseat freestyle by kendrick lamar. riot by childish gambino. love sosa by chief keef. didn't cha know by erykah badu.

AKAASHI KEIJI:

!!? erykah badu elitist... tell me i'm wrong. and i get him!! this mf will be listening to green eyes like he was the one andre 3000 personally broke up with like BRO 😭 it is the perfect song to fuel his overthinking <3 he likes her more jazzy chill music because he doesn't like listening to anything crazy upbeat but bokuto makes him

his favourite songs by erykah badu are:

★ other side of the game on the baduizm album.

★ green eyes on the mama's gun album.

★ gone baby, don't be so long on the new amerykah part two: return of the ankh album.

!!? he doesn't listen to a lot of newer songs unless his friends make him, but one artist bokuto put him on is laufey. her fun songs aren't super overstimulating for him like most of the songs bokuto's has played for him and just like erykah, she unfortunately has the perfect discography for overthinking.... he likes to think he's branching out but most of what he listens to is just variations or heavy elements of jazz 😭

his favourite songs by laufey are:

★ i wish you love - live at the symphony on the a night at the symphony album.

★ trouble on the bewitched: the goddess edition album.

★ falling behind on the everything i know about love album.

⌗ HONOURABLE SONG MENTIONS: kiss of life by sade. champagne coast by blood orange. i know it's over by the smiths. poetic justice by kendrick lamar and drake. i fall in love too easily by chet baker.

BOKUTO KOUTARO:

!!? it would truly be a crime to deny that he is a hardcore waka flocka flame enthusiast. his alarm wakes him up with no hands at 6am every morning and he goes to sleep to wild boy. he even tried to negotiate with a tech guy at one of his big games so round of applause could play when he entered the court.

his favourite songs by waka flocka flame are:

★ rooster in my rari on the triple f life: friends, fans & family album.

★ no hands (ft. roscoe dash & wale) (single).

★ o let's do it (ft. cap) on the flockaveli album.

!!? the pop girlie equivalent to waka flocka flame... lady gaga. he just likes a lot going on in his music and that is Not his fault. he said that once and he was told to get into metal and he respected it... it just wasn't him. he immediately went back to his roots which were speechless and starstruck!! him and oikawa bond over their love for loud dance pop music for sure.

his favourite songs by lady gaga are:

★ justdance on the the fame monster album.

★ applause on the ARTPOP album.

★ telephone (ft beyonce) on the the fame monster (deluxe version) album.

⌗ HONOURABLE SONG MENTIONS: HOT TO GO! by chappell roan. shake back by kodak black. from the start by laufey. fantasy by mariah carey. big poppa by the notorious B.I.G..

[mbat]

im remembering a trans youtuber saying they didnt hear how 'im still here' from treasure planet is trans and i . am still reeling from that and that was months ago. how can one hear this song and NOT hear how trans it is tbh. every lyric is so trans. like it definitely leans transmasc and that youtuber isnt transmasc but still