#like im not confident at all
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It's weird but like i don't think people get what it's like when you grow up with emotionally manipulative parents who gaslight you, that you have so much self-doubt that anyone, literally anyone, with ill intent could angrily, sternly, with conviction, start preaching in on you that the sky actually consists of whales and your panic brain response will be "omg i was so dumb all my almost 30 years of life, i thought the sky was atoms and air and was mostly colored blue but no, all my self perception is always wrong and you are 100% right and i'm breathing whales and i have no reason whatsoever to question you even tho I literally just met you 2 seconds ago"
#i told a coworker today that i actually dont trust myself at all#just that i have to trust what ive learned professionally bc animal lives are at stake#i am always asking people to look over my shoulder and i am triple checking myself#if not quintuple checking if thats the word#even in stress situations#like im not confident at all#im just good at stress and panic situations#im used to the discomfort of tjem#but i am not self confident#ignore me#gaslighting#manipulative parents#emotional neglect#c-ptsd#i am mentally ill
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bad youtube clickbait thumbnail that reads "I think I just had a therapy session with a DEMON???"
#gravity falls#gf nevermind all that#the book of bill#bill cipher#dipper pines#theres a tag now so im not gonna link all the context in the post anymore#i have no confidence this one is even funny i just wanted to draw them#we talk about this all the time but its endlessly funny that stump made a billford au and both of us have been like.#so mabel and dipper right? how are mabel and dipper how are they handling the situations. just fine it seems
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apollo’s confidence in court: oh my god i’m the worst lawyer ever my client is going to go to JAIL because i can’t even do my JOB
apollo’s confidence outside of court: i’m the only smart one here, i’m the most normal guy in the world and NO ONE is doing it like i am, investigations are EASY, klavier gavin wants me carnally
#ace attorney#apollo justice#klavier gavin#klapollo#ace attorney incorrect quotes#the last one isn’t even his confidence tbh it’s just a fact#he says it like he doesn’t ALSO want klavier gavin carnally though which he does#alternatively:#apollo at klavier in court: *sweats* he’s so hot and competent#apollo at klavier outside of court: um…hello….you are kind of really nice🥺👉👈#disgusting#im obsessed with them#preordered the new trilogy of three games i already own today😌#$60 of my very hard earned money right into that#and i cant even regret it im SO excited#all the extrassssss#PLEASE go look at the aa twitter account to see the art extras btw#they’re SO fun#apollo justice trilogy really being about 75% of my will to live rn
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love when men cry about body hair bc "it's hygiene" and yet 15% of cis men leave the bathroom without washing their hands at all and an additional 35% only just wet their hands without using soap. that is nearly half of all men. that means statistically you have probably shaken hands with or been in direct contact with one of these people.
love when men say that women "only want money" when it turns out that even in equal-earning homes, women are actually adding caregiver burdens and housework from previous years, whereas men have been expanding leisure time and hobbies. in equal-earning households, men spend an average of 3.5 hours extra in leisure time per week, which is 182 hours per year - a little over a week of paid vacation time that the other partner does not receive. kinda sounds like he wants her money.
love that men have decided women are frail and weak and annoying when we scream in surprise but it turns out it's actually women who are more reliable in an emergency because men need to be convinced to actually take action and respond to the threat. like, actually, for-real: men experience such a strong sense of pride about their pre-supposed abilities that it gets them and their families killed. they are so used to dismissing women that it literally kills them.
love it. told my father this and he said there's lies, damned lies, and statistics. a year ago i tried to get him to evacuate the house during a flash flood. he ignored me and got injured. he has told me, laughing, that he never washes his hands. he has said in the last week that women are just happier when we're cooking or cleaning.
maybe i'm overly nostalgic. but it didn't used to feel so fucking bleak. it used to feel like at least a little shameful to consider women to be sheep. it just feels like the earth is round and we are still having conversations about it being flat - except these conversations are about the most obvious forms of patriarchy. like, we know about this stuff. we've known since well before the 50's.
recently andrew tate tried to justify cheating on his partner as being the "male prerogative." i don't know what the prerogative for the rest of us would be. just sitting at home, watching the slow erosion of our humanity.
#writeblr#warm up#ps edited so it is more clear where “half” of men is coming from:#15% literally don't even touch water#an ADDITIONAL 35% ''wash'' by just running their hands under water WITHOUT SOAP#15+35 =50%#like that is not washing ur hands. go back and use soap#btw the numbers for women are 4% never washing and 15% ''just water''#which is still gross but like. sooo much better yikes#ps i know we're all gay on this site but watching ppl ''correct'' my math on this has been wild#i have a learning disability im genuinely bad at math so i check EVERY time someone corrects me#but no they're just confidently wrong.....#182 hours is a week babes. 182/24 (number of hours in a day) is ~7.6#that's where i got that number from. also from rent we know there's 168 hours in a week.#ALSO btw if u read this and ur response is ''men are also struggling rn tho'' like babe you missed the point of it tho#this doesn't even make fun of men it's legit just pointing out that bigotry against women isn't founded#in anything men actually CARE about . like they don't actually CARE about ''being clean'' when they make fun of armpit hair#or they would be WASHING THEIR HANDS.#men pretend to be rollin' in cash and Apex Predators and instead they are trained to be lazy and unwilling to act in emergencies#i have never and will never make fun of men for asking for more support on important topics like DV and mental health.#this is so clearly not about men; it's about how common just being plainly misogynistic has become.#like they don't try to hide it anymore.
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How did your meeting go with the surgeons?
it was memorable
#sci speaks#the sci files#im glad i've done all the research. i feel okay. i feel safe and confident. and the doctors have all been really kind and helpful.#lots of good vibes. and they're moving me through the system so quickly. i'm glad it'll be dealt with so soon.#feels so crazy that this has been going on. right under my skin. and it's all explained now and i feel so much more in control.#i know whats going on!! with my funky body!! no more unanswered questions!!#i feel really good these days. optimistic. i feel like i understand myself a lot more and it means i'm better to myself.#but you'll all have to be patient with me. please be patient with me like i've learnt to be patient with myself.
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so I’ve been gaining a lot of insight into the animation industry recently, especially in regards to pitching & the creation of new shows. There’s a few ways to go about it.
First, there’s pitching to a studio. When you pitch, it has to be SHORT and CONCISE. You may write a lovingly detailed pitch bible that perfectly breaks down episodes and characterizations, and it might barely even get read. First impressions, first impressions, first impressions!
Most peoples’ first projects don’t get picked up. I’ve heard a few stories from directors that said they tried pitching a story they’d had for years, which got rejected, to then spend a week or even several hours in their car coming up with a new idea, only for that to get greenlit.
But that’s not the end of it. Just because a show gets greenlit, doesn’t mean it will ever get finished. There’s lots of things that can happen. Sometimes, unexpected major world events (like… a global pandemic) can cause projects to get chopped. Sometimes, a CEO change or studio merge means a single person can decide a project “no longer fits with the company’s brand.” Sometimes, the one producer that was rooting for your project gets laid off, and no one else cares enough, so it gets shelved. Sometimes, a streaming service decides to create an animation department, and then they decide they don’t want it anymore. Sometimes, the studio will be simultaneously be developing another project that was too similar to yours and they just didn’t think to tell you until they decide yours is the one with less potential.
On top of that, almost everyone in the industry is saying that “studios just don’t pick up original content anymore.” Studios want something they can franchise, something that will bring in money. New content is risky. Established fanbases are safer.
However! Studios can still be a very good thing. They can be unionized. They can provide better benefits and resources. They can have connections and infrastructure and a larger volume of workers. At a studio, you can divide the labor and produce more in less time. Longer episodes, longer seasons, more consistency in quality.
But this comes with all of the disadvantages of having more in the kitchen.
The alternative is indie animation.
With indie animation, you have total freedom. Full artistic control. It doesn’t even matter if your idea sucks ass, because there’s no one to tell you you can’t make it. You could make it anyway, and you can make it whatever you wanted.
The thing is, making animation is hard. In my production class last semester, the average maximum animation one person could make in that timeframe was 30-60 seconds, and that’s not even counting background design, sound design, or cleanup/color. To make a 5 minute animated short, you should probably have at least 5 people.
And it is CRUCIAL you have a production manager. Ideally someone who’s not already doing art for the project. Most projects without a production manager will fall apart pretty quickly. Once the adrenaline and impulse-fueled motivation wears off, you need someone to hold you accountable and enforce deadlines and proper time management.
Speaking of time, that’s also hard to get. The more people you have, the more likely schedules won’t line up. Most people will have school, or other jobs.
And it costs MONEY!!!!!! You either have everyone work for free and volunteer their time & energy, or you establish a business as a proper indie studio, with people who may or may not have experience on how to handle paying someone else’s salary. And the money has to come from somewhere, so you have to rely on crowdfunding like patreon or kickstarter. (This, by the way, is why I could never fault an indie animation for releasing merch with their pilot.)
And like, maybe you wanna do a series, and all your friends agree to volunteer their labor and time to make the first episode, but it was unanimously not sustainable. Deciding not to produce a second episode until you can raise enough money is not being suddenly greedy, it’s attempting to compensate people rather than expecting them to be continuously taken advantage of.
You have to consider your output as well. There are some outliers like Worthikids, who afaik does all his animation himself, and afaik can work on it full-time thanks to his patreon subscribers. And he still has only produced a total of 30 minutes of animation (for Big Top Burger specifically) in the past 4 years. This is an IMPRESSIVE feat and this is with using a lot of 3D as part of his pipeline!!
Indie animation also has the complication of being more accessible for fandoms. When you’re posting your Official Canon Content on youtube, it doesn’t look a lot different than the fandom-created video essay in the sidebar next to it. What’s canon vs what’s fanon becomes less distinguishable. The boundaries are blurrier. When the creator is just some guy you follow on twitter, it’s easier to prod them for info regarding ships and theories and word-of-god confirmation. They don’t have a PR team or entire international tv networks to appeal to. And this is when creators get frustrated that their fans snowball and turn their creation into something they don’t recognize (and no longer enjoy) anymore.
So it’s tricky.
Thankfully, the threshold to learn animation is fairly low nowadays!! There are TONS of resources online to learn it on your own without forking over a couple hundred thousand to a private art college. There are conventions and discord servers and events where you can network, if you know where to look.
I know it can seem discouraging in the face of capitalism, but I think that’s all the more reason why it’s so important to BE DETERMINED about animation!! We’re already starting to see the beginning of an indie animation boom, and I think it’s a testament to humanity’s desire to tell stories and create art. Even if there’s no financial gain, we do whatever it takes to tell our stories anyway.
#animation#2d animation#indie animation#long post#not 100% sure why I made this post#all this to say: I’m still not sure what direction I want to go towards for my own show#ngl!! i think im confident i could get people to like my show. i think I could find an audience#i have some experience at this point getting people to like my ocs#its just a matter of MAKING the damn thing
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fucking hate this guy I want to make him cry so bad.
#my art#Im not 100% sure i could make them cry except p3 dude. i am 100% confident i could make him cry.#postal#postal 2#postal dude#postal 2 dude#ive been drawing him for like 2 months and ive hated all of them. im almost done with a more elaborate one i like way better#i drew this other one with like a full fucking background and i didn tpost it because i hate his face :( im trying to fix it its not workin#rws#p2 dude
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in my AU where satou got isekai'd:
+ OMAKE🌸⬇️
because the mans always surrounded by clichés and WHAT is more cliché than this genre??? (゜∇^d)!!
writing a fic for it atm thats titled
"My Average CRUSH Turned into an ISEKAI PROTAGONIST: That Time I Became the Overpowered Heroine & Followed Him to Another World!!"
if that gives you context for the scene LMFAO
#kuriko is sooo cute i was losing my mind drawing this#in all the like... 10 hours... it took me#hopefully the fic isnt so hard teehee#not to out myself as an isekai enjoyer or anything#but i watch a LOT of them (💀) so im confident in my ability to make a passable spoof#saiki k#isekai#comic#saiki kuriko#saiki x satou#dirtbag's saiki k vault >:)
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Covers for A Game of Thrones, I (Jon Snow) II (Daenerys Targaryen) III (Tyrion Lannister) IV (Catelyn Stark) V (Ned Stark) & A Clash of Kings, I (Arya Stark) II (Theon Greyjoy) III (Sansa Stark) IV (Davos Seaworth) V (Bran Stark), drawn by Ken Sugiwara for the Japanese paperback release of A Song of Ice and Fire.
#a song of ice and fire#asoiaf#asoiaf art#jon snow#daenerys targaryen#tyrion lannister#catelyn stark#ned stark#arya stark#theon greyjoy#sansa stark#davos seaworth#bran stark#valyrianscrolls#a game of thrones#agot#a clash of kings#acok#asoiaf official art#i have been trawling for the highest quality resolutions i can find of these but#ken sugiwara does not have any sort of social media presence i could find#and all uploads of the covers are either pics or the same lowering quality images each time#if i can find better hd images ill replace the pics in this...#anyway just wanted to aggregate these because i dont think ppl know how about the theon one#im relatively confident on all of these characters except maybe davos but all the forums i could find either didnt mention this book or#was the One Comment going thats davos.#so like. i think its davos.#grace post
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so interesting to me how we've heard phil's perspective on meeting dan for the first time but haven't heard dan's at all (aside from the mr. burns comment lmao 💀). like i wonder if dan would agree with phil and describe himself as being confident, or if he was also nervous and either was good at hiding it and/or phil didn't see it through his own nerves
(slightly unrelated but i just realized this so i'm gonna put it here: dan and phil are COWARDS because why have they answered two different questions about first impressions and only talked about their impressions when meeting irl.... like why are they still withholding their first impressions of each other online (¬_¬))
#granted im sure they've talked about this privately so like. phil would know how nervous dan was/wasnt bc im sure dan has told him#but we've heard phil say he was nervous and we've heard phil say his opinion of dan was that he was confident#but dan hasn't said shit abt how he felt!!!#and im also not saying it couldnt be the case that dan was confident. but like. im sure we've all been in situations where we're so nervous#ourselves that we don't realize the other person is just as nervous yk 😭 and ik if *I* were dan I would be scared shitless but maybe he's#just better than me idk#dan and phil#phan#d&p#wordvom.txt
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I love giving robins little knee and elbow pads. safety first ♥️ (lets him get back to chasing serial killers and super villains)
#dc#mine#batfam#robin#jason todd#im sticking to this design for robins 1 and 2. after that. who knows#robin 1 had briefs for a time tho. he insisted#first time dad bruce was like well he seems so confident about it he is the gymnast here#also robin 1 tears off the knee and elbow pads at his earliest convenience and batman has to pick them up all over gotham
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Maybe i do think wrapping someone i love up in a blanket and holding them for hours would fix me it’s whatever though mind your own business
#wlw#wlw mood#sapphic#sapphism#lesbian#do NOT mind your own business let me make you into a blanket burrito#so we can CUDDLE#your girls been going through it but pretty sure this would solve all my problems#don’t ask anyone else’s opinion because im realllyyyyt confident okay#im gay and i like sleeping
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this place is so fruity
#ive had this in my drafts for MONTHS#im not really that confident in how the pose looks so I settled on stopping here#I wish I got to see them interact more but it was so exciting to see Franziska being nicer and a little conscientious since the last game#i knw the main idea in the games is to help ppl we barely know and go thru all this trouble than just dismiss it bc we dont think#its worth the effort but theres also the way this shapes how characters interact and develop relationships with each other#even though i know maya and franziska are like strangers to each other given how theyve barely talked to each other in canon#using what the game tells me abt them and thinking abt how they would interact in a believable way than what they already have#is something i really appreciate abt the ace attorney series. in canon these guys only ever have a reason to interact bc of#circumstances that force them to. canon is a suggestion to me and if smth fanon feels believable to me i could not care less#aa#ace attorney#doodles#my art#myart#franmaya#maya fey#franziska von karma
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Just a girl who wants to be her mother’s daughter in the ways that matter
#Such a tenacious go getter & the smartest woman ik#Has NEVER looked back at a man twice. Knows she’s beautiful & that attention is guaranteed. Never desperate for male validation ever#The best fashion sense ik. She’s the epitome of classic & vintage#Doesn’t gaf what others are doing / is always tunnel visioned on her own goals#A mega workaholic and like. Maybe I’d rather balance but still she’s still an overachiever#I feel im becoming more and more like her by the day but still I have some work to do#Need to be more focused & to stop entertaining little boys fr#I just want to move w the unshackling confidence & elegance she seems to emanate effortlessly#I swear that woman was born that way!!!! So unfair for the rest of us mortals#Why does no one talk about the psychological torture that comes w having a naturally gorgeous genius mother#I’m dying over here I just wanna be like her but im pushing that boulder up the hill all the time#Meanwhile she’s always just On#HOW#Just an eldest daughter having a crisis about her mother who is also#The eldest daughter out of her and her two brothers#I need to journal about this I need to meditate#How to manufacture the drive that your mother was simply endowed with at birth#Not even joking I just got off my internship and now im sitting on a swing under the late May sun having a crisis about this
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once again i was fueled with coffee (did not sleep the whole night) but this time i doodled college au to cope bc ofc i did (also did not feel like sleeping wooo)
#self insert#cross!sans#epic!sans#mblue art#cm#m rambles#(that tag is needed bc hoo boy u can tell i did not get sleep and is fueled by caffeine)#(do not be like me!!!!!!!!! do not deprive urself of sleep 💀💀💀)#(get a good 6-7hrs a day if u can. if 4-5hr works better for u then im not forcing u to sleep more 😤😤😤 as long as u rest well 😁👍)#(AND HYDRATE... if ur reading this try to take a sip rn 🥤)#campus au#(college au scenarios will be tagged that heehoo)#not colored just lines bby 😎😎😎#idiots to lovers type shit where they both confide in epic n he's just chillin#waiting for the time when these dummies will finally confess to eachother themselves#(look i think it's rlly funny seeing cross be all cool calm collected in public but when he talks to epic abt his crush)#(he goes insane with a million different flustered/blushing emojis)#( 'they told me good luck on my test and gave me the nicest smile ever how was i gonna live after that' goofy ass. idiot /aff)#( 'DUDE THEY GAVE ME A MOTIVATIONAL NOTE. IN /PINK/ PAPER. ON CHOCOLATE. DOES THIS...... 😳' guys i love silly dorky cross to bits so much)#(man fucking explodes w his simping n epic just goes LMAO but he's v supportive for his bruh 💪😤)#(on the other hand my sona thinks he's sooo cool and awesome and smart and honestly fucking charming HHELLO THE TIMES WHEN HE LAUGHS AND)#(AND SMILES HELLOOO MR HANDSOME I MEAN WHATT)#( 'stars if he likes me back i wouldn't know what to do with myself. fucking EXPLODE? YIPPEE CONFETTI??' lots of flushge )#(going ueueue at big bro epic bc they got a super massive crush on his bestie but)#(but the head is entertaining 'what-if's BUT i think kuya epic knows how to steer the thoughts away from those and smack em w teasing 😎✨)#(ultimately distracting and successfully reassuring them 😎😎😎)#(tsundere mblue no way not in here im down bad astronomically full on simping my guys)#(he might be a dumbass sometimes but he's my dumbass) (ok i'll shut up now fr)#anywayz campus au is the my highschool au but we're all adults and more tired yippeee
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curious 2 know: how many books have yall read that you consider, like, actually perfect? like, 10/10 no notes wouldn't change a thing perfect
#was talking with my friends and they were all like hmm idk maybe 1 or 2 and i had to say confidently 20#books#bookblr#rb bait#reblog bait#reading#<-ig lol#to be fair to my friends most of them dont really read a lot but only 1 or 2 was crazy to me#also feel free to name them bc im always looking for more perfect books yk
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