#like im not actively suicidal
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
hot take but i dont think sun is suicidal
i dont think hes the one with the worst mental health in this show either
besides eclipse (bc thats obvious), id say solar has the worst mental health
hes already killed 2 ppl (didnt want to kill either of them and one was on accident), is insecure about his own identity (asked computer if hes like the other eclipses, and i also bet montys... "teasing" didnt help), has no hobbies of his own, refuses to actually acknowledge his own issues, doesnt communicate to ppl and tries to "not be a bother" to others, never does anything for himself and only ever does when someone tells him to, and probably more.
but i'll analyze solar and his shit mental health later; i wanna ramble about sun
i dont think sun has ever been actively suicidal, mainly passive. in case ur wondering wut the difference is:
being passively suicidal is having thoughts and "wishes" but never actually planning to do anything. a lot of ppl will think "i wish i was dead" when in reality wut they need is a break and they have no real desire to die (this is a common thought process to have when ur burnt out or generally in a mental rut)
being actively suicidal is actually planning to do something and seeking out ways to harm urself with the intent of being severely injured or dying. this is an immediate emergency
sun never went out in search of ways to die. he never planned out ways he could kill himself. the time we heard him say "i wish i was dead" was right after he hallucinated bloodmoon and old moon taunting him. he was tired and he needed a fucking break, so he expressed that through saying "i wish i was dead". now u might be thinking "but birdcage, he did go out and do risky things knowing he might die" yes, that is true. but that does not mean that dying was his intention. he went out and did dangerous things bc he wanted to help, not die.
but if we return to the current moment; he is absolutely not suicidal. his mental health is deteriorating, yes. but from wut i can tell he hasnt shown any signs of suicidal ideation. for a while sun said he had pretty stable mental health. it was only until eclipse came back did his health really start to deteriorate again. then if u add on to how hes constantly being pushed to the side and ignored by his own family (im more than mildly frustrated by that) that is absolutely a disaster brewing under the surface. but does that mean hes currently, at the very least passively, suicidal? no. probably not. at least, from wut we can tell there isnt much to back up the idea that he is.
wut sun needs is to be acknowledged and let in on the happenings of the family instead of being ignored. he also needs to learn how to communicate better bc the severe lack of it is wuts going to cause the downfall of everyone in the show
#birdcage rambles#suicide#suicidal thoughts#i really felt like explaining the difference between passive and active suicidal thoughts is VERY important for this conversation#bc. from wut i could tell. sun was never actively suicidal#unless im missing something#it was always passive#sun and moon show#sams#tsams#the sun and moon show#sams sun#tsams sun#sun sams#sun tsams#sams solar#tsams solar#i think he still counts to be added in here since i talked about him briefly
165 notes
·
View notes
Text
TW: suicide mention
Reigen and Serizawa have some talking to do.
#i don’t think reigen is actively suicidal#but like with rusty i think he would take absurd risks without thinking about himself#learning to love yourself is hard#reigen has a lot of therapy to go to but i believe in him#serizawa would definitely understand#reigen learning to accept himself and be more vulnerable around the people he cares about is so important to me#im normal#and their mental health talks go both ways of course#reigen is there for serizawa just as much as serizawa is for him#they care about each other#mp100#mob psycho 100#mp100 fanart#serizawa katsuya#reigen arataka#don’t ask about the symbolism i tried to put in there#(totally ask about it)
870 notes
·
View notes
Text
i cant sleep is this anything
#cal.txt#spn#supernatural#spn shitposts#tfw#tfw2.0#garth fitzgerald iv#jack kline#dean winchester#sam winchester#castiel#jimmy novak#every friend group has#really all of them qualify for active suicide risk but PicsArt can only do so much#im pretty sure they also qualify for missing persons but again. much likes gods love PicsArt has its limits
26 notes
·
View notes
Text
personal growth is crazy because it seems like nothing has changed until you're crying because you don't want to die. you learn something about yourself that ten years ago would have actually killed you, and now you're thinking about what you can do to heal and make peace with it. nothing may have changed to you, but to the person you were however long ago, you are the "it gets better"
#guy who's very proud of how well he's handling things rn lol#anyways personal time:#but idk man i kinda remembered smthn from my past n#like. if it wasn't for how much effort i've put into my mental health n coping skills#n my support network now#idk id be in a much worse place.#so i'm gonna forgive myself for not really sleeping last night#n having a hard time with my bpd feelings n emotions#because fuck man! i'm doin really good actually!#growth doesn't have to be oh man i'm never ever sad anymore#it's just. idk i don't cry because i Wanna die anymore#sometimes i have an intrusive thought of suicide#and it makes me cry because i DONT wanna die. and i know those thoughts are not good or needed#but i'm not gonna beat myself up for having them. i'm just gonna be patient n gentle w myself#n give myself time#n everything will be okay(:#bc it is okay! it's in the past and i'm safe now. and i wanna make other people feel safe too#growth starts w baby steps. n that's why it's so hard to recognize in yourself a lot of the time#it goes slooooooowly. for me at least lol.#mine#despite everything i am happy because i know my life now is one i love (: and one im actively trying to better for myself
30 notes
·
View notes
Note
i guarantee you that any job you get outside of walmart will be an improvement. i was so scared of switching jobs but when i did it was the best decision i ever made. a different environment with different bosses can make a huge difference. it’s scary but so worth it, even if it takes a few tries.
thank you ;_; its nice / comforting to know its a little scary for everyone. me when i have to do it scared i suppose and plus i know if i dont take the opportunity now im just going to be stuck because even though walmart is soooo evil its been weirdly stable for me due to the fact that unfortunately im a very easily exploitable employee (<-- chronic overachiever guy). i keep getting told by coworkers too that i just need to take the leap because even they can see im being run into the ground
#ask#<-- not eating not sleeping eye twitching headache for 8 days levels of stress#i think its also just extra scary because i was kind of denied the ability to go to college by abusive parents#so like i dont even have a degree in anything which feels like a massive hurdle#but i just need to have like the confidence. im already so overqualified for my job as is#its like a waste of my work ethic to stay#NOT NORMAL for a job to make you actively suicidal and to have bosses that dont respect your boundaries ‼️
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
#alt title 1: yes im kinkshaming him#alt title 2: something never changes#(c692 spoilers)#you guys ever think abt how insane it is that amidst the holy war where every single new ally should be appreciated#casey was the only one who ludger still deliberately tried to turn against him by reminding her that he was the villain#whats even more insane is that he seemly didnt plan to fiercely resist her anyway altho he was also so close to achieving his goals#for his crimes of threatening countless lives via this war he was so readily awaiting for her judgment & letting her justice see it through#but she decidedly just didnt give it to him#altho ludger is not someone whos actively suicidal if his death is the outcome brought by casey it seems like he would gladly accept it tbh#because after all she is supposed to be his executioner... as she was three years ago#and more importantly because thats how 'the final problem' concluded: with the absolute defeat of evil#academy's undercover professor#academy's undercover professor spoilers
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#ok ramble time#classic this feels too intimate to share with anyone so everyone gets it#essentially last week there was a suicide on campus#he was not one of my students or in our department#I'm pretty removed from it#ans i really didn't think it affected me#but i guess it has#bc like i thought i was over#✨this✨#Like ok i have had active plans in the past#one of those this is how this is when this is where#just waiting for the final straw#but i clearly never did#and that plan would no longer work due to changes in circumstances and living arrangements etc#which is honestly probably for the best#bc i refuse to make a new one bc i know i do not want to go there#but im just TIRED and ANXIOUS#its not even the depression its the anxiety of living#i stay up until 3-4 in the morning bc i cant stand the idea of going to sleep#and i secretly hope each sleep will be my last#bc im not going to DO anything bc that would not be it#too many ppl care about me (unfortunately)#and then ive stopped eating (again)#and it's like idek if its bc i dont want to or bc i forget#its like i see myself self destructing but cant make myself stop#and I have not done anything physically stupid in quite a long time but ive started biting to stim#and i dont even know im doing it half the time it just helps#and skin picking. which none or this is the same as true s/h but it does scare me to a degree bc i dont mean to i just do it#anyway i don't expect anyone to read all of this i just had to get it out ot my head
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
omg Oathbringer (in universe book) is basically one of those schlocky inspiration porn how-I-got-sober memoirs. He made it.
#luke.txt#Spotify advertised an audiobook of one of those for me. sorry man I like not being actively suicidal#drunkposting#the epigraphs in part one of Oathbringer being all like I hope this book brings you hope because I too have changed <3#im gonna pull a sadeas and tell Dalinar to shut uppppppppppp you stupid bondsmith
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
has anyone noticed the world is getting so much smaller lately
#ive been actively suicidal for many months now and it keeps getting worse#im not safe anywhere im not either working at or paying to be and even then anyone can hurt me at any time and i just have to take it#i don't even want to go anywhere anymore#my cat just died he had some kind of disease or maybe cancer and he was throwing up so much he just gave up on eating#and i kept telling them he was losing a lot of weight but they ignored it until he was skin and bones and dehydrated and jaundiced#and it was too late#and i want to waste away too but im not even strong enough i just keep working like always#the world is just so small now#this isn't like. a suicide note or anything ill keep living for now#but i am fucking desperate#suicide m#animal death#idk what else#im sorry to whiny ventpost but idk what else to do
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
doing shitty again wooo yay.
#personal#can my grandma shut the fuck up for once thank youuu#nothing i ever fucking do is good enough for her ! sorry for having a messy room even though you know im actively suicidal and -#-so sick i cant stand right now !#sorry for having 2 missing assignments ! two ! fucking two ! even thought you know i have depression ! im so sorry my highness !#sorry for having the worst fucking year of my life last year can you PLEASE stop FUCKING bringing it up ALL THE TIME#im not allowed to fucking have emotions near her . im not allowed to be anything but constantly happy im so fucking tired#im not allowed to have issues . im not allowed to not eat for 3 days without the passive aggressive ''look who's finally eating'' and the-#- speech on why i shouldnt have the problems i have . I KNOW . I DONT FUCKING WANT THEM EITHER.#she just expects me to be the perfect daughter after 14 years of abuse . you dont just fucking bounce back from something like that .#sorry ill be normal after this . ill shut up#ed tw#suicide mention
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Feeling very Ascension by Gorillaz ft Vince Staples at 2:18
#i need to solve a puzzle or some shit. god. fuck.#i cant concentrate on anything i cant fall asleep i cant stay asleep i cant stay awake i cant wake up on time#i hate depression 😒 and all the other things wrong with me yknow#i need to do something like. good for me. but its so damn hard to drag myself into doing that too#brain. stop being so foggy. please.#im even like. im eating im drinking water. i could probably like do some sort of exercise but everything makes me so tired.....#like even a walk yknow? i do my shift at work and im at 3% battery. i dont. i dont know what to do man#and i dont even wanna die about it???? im actively NOT suicidal for once#like are you kidding me??? ive been suicidal for like over a decade and for once#my brain is still popping up like have you considered killing yourself? 🤔 but im Genuinely not swayed by it at all#which is weird. and probably good. but now i just feel like. numb#stuck. stagnant. foggy. can we PLEASE cut through this fog and have some meaningful brain functions for a little bit. brain. cmon#i dont wanna die but i *do* wanna sleep for like. three days#i want a week off where i have NOTHIN to do#genuinely nothing to do. chores are done work is on pause i need nothing creeping in at the edges thinkin bout#ohhhhh you should be doing this instead..........youre wasting your time........do a task.....#but i cant i cant do a task. i cant. and its so frustrating and i feel bad about it#id feel much worse about it if my BRAIN wasnt as foggy as fucking SAN FRANCISCO#and i keep trying like. healthy ways of ''feeling something'' like hobbies i like or yummy food#nothin. does fuckin nothin. i get off and it gives me a Little bit of clarity Maybe. like#no wonder bad coping mechanisms happen yknow??? its an absolute fucking miracle i havent taken up smoking#anyway. i need to go to bed. tomorrows gonna be a long day. if you feel so inclined send me mental love or something. im fuckin tired folks.
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
me: im a bi lesbian :3
exclusionists & radfems exploding into my space out of nowhere: "just call yourself sapphic oh my god" "kill yourself tra" "thats not a thing youre just bi with a preference" "get raped terf" "ew fucking bihet" "oh you poor lesbian with comphet </3" "cock sucker" "look at this fucking hetero bitch" "youre a lesbophobe, biphobe, and transphobe" "youre just a contributor to lesbians being raped"
me:
#just some of the insane shit ive for real been sent by these people#rape tw#suicide bait tw#suicide tw#bi lesbian#still insane to me exclusionists will yell horrible shit at me while calling me a terf#when terfs are also yelling the same horrible shit at me. like yeah i dont think yall know what a terf is#a terf is not ''person with a weird label i dont like that i heard an unsourced rumor (aka lie) about being made by a terf“#terfs hate me for being a nonbinary genderfluid lesboy bi lesbian asexual bitch with a multitude of other labels/genders/pronouns#and i actively denounce everything they stand for because i actually pay attention to their ideologies to know what im even arguing against#like lesbian separatism. theyre huuuuuge on that. exclusionists also love it though and pretend that theyre not siding with terfs on it#bilesbophobia#queerphobia
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
what even is the house md fandom anymore. what even is anything anymore.
#asclexeposting#house md#the fixation is actively dying and wow this fandom is odd (men-fixed /pos /nm)! love u guys <3#its just like. not much in the fandom sparks joy anymore. sorry sorry sorry#im scared to post this? sorry mutuals unfollow me if u want#raghh im feeling really weird (suicidal) today
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
it’s good to remember that constantly suffering does not help anyone. some level of observation/witnessing and remembering the dead is human and necessary, feeling grief and choosing to act on that grief by doing what you can to protest or fight against the genocide is good, but aimless spiraling over the genocide does not bring it any closer to stopping. if you’re so in despair about it that you feel paralyzed or hopeless or cannot act on that feeling, it just is not productive, and i really do implore you to recognize your limits. do not stop speaking up and do not stop pushing for a ceasefire and for palestine to be free but do also take care of yourself if you are in a position to be able to. you are more able to be loud and productive when you have access to hope and when you are more mentally sound
this is written with the nuance and understanding that palestinians do not have the privilege of stepping away for self care while they are being actively killed, but again, people who are in a position to care for themselves who do not and then spiral out of control do not magically put palestinians into a better position by doing so
#kiki was here#kiki.txt#this is why i continue to post somewhat normally between other things#it’s like a balancing act#i am very prone to suicidal spirals abt this stuff#like ive experienced severe activism burnout during prior crises#so im more aware of my limits now#like how far i can go before i have to put it down#so that i can come back and pick it back up#sorry for editing this post like twice#premature thought whoops
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
life is beautiful bc i didn't kill myself at 16
#suicide ment#<-jic#srry thinking abt how far ive come#i like. enjoy living. and im activity looking towards the future and i have plans and aspirations. like wtf#i never thought i would make it this far#i think it's hitting this hard cos im turning the age i thought I'd be dead by#lile obvs i still have issues. but im not actively suicidal!!!!!!!! :D
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
ive gotta be real im kind of losing hope for life
#it feels like it's only get worse and worse lately and i just don't know what to do man#its just like. swallowing me whole#the furure feels so fucking looming no matter what#i feel like a pathetic bum because i genuinely dont know that ill ever be able to take on longer than a 25 hour work week max#and because of how everything is im doomed to be forever dependant on someone covering so much for me#i don't feel like I'm ever going to be secure and i just. i have hopes for the future but any time i try to consider how i get there i just#it feels like everything falls apart#i know it's probably because it's 2 in the morning but i just don't have any faith in my life...#it's hard not to just. consider death sometimes i guess. I'm not actively suicidal. id hardly even say i passively am most of the time#it's just like... i don't fucking know how I'm going to make it out of this man. i feel so hopeless#...rant over
13 notes
·
View notes