#like i think that in the context of this being a tumblr post it's easy to misread iv and overinterpret iii

[a-third-attempt]

iv,

My grandmother Janet is 96 years old. The last time I visited, while drinking the traditional after-dinner gin and tonics, we got to talking about the treasures lying around her house. Somehow we settled on a particular needlepoint hanging on the wall.

She asked: Who made that one, does it say?

And I said: It says "Deedee".

And she laughed: I didn't remember making that one!

My brain wasn't working as fast as my tongue that night— perhaps on account of the gin— and I said: Wait, who is Deedee?

She laughed again, and explained. It was what her parents called her, and the name that she used until she went to high school. All her best friends, everyone who knew her from back in the day, they still call her Deedee.

And then she said to me: You know, Janet is not my real name either. Nobody calls me by my real name, because nobody alive remembers it. And I'm not telling anyone now. It is just for me.

iii,

I was studying abroad in Budapest when I received a facebook message from Rob. A friend, not quite 21, from college back home, saying: I have a secret to tell you, but I do not want anyone else to know. I don't even want to write it here.

I replied, Here is my address. Write it down and mail it to me. I will read it, and then I will burn it; and he agreed.

I left the house, went all the way to the end of the metro, found a convenience store, bought a pack of matches, and sat down in the nearby park.

The three sentences at the start of the letter were: I am transgender. I am a man. My name is not [what we once called him], it is Rob.

This much is no longer a secret, but the three pages that followed are not my stories to tell.

(Have you ever tried to burn a letter? With a match. It is harder than you’d think.)

It is common now for a trans person to refer to their "old" name, the one assigned to them that they no longer use, as their deadname. Rob did not use this language in the letter, probably only because he did not know it yet.

Some of the debris from the letter made it into a trash can. But most blew away into the Hungarian landscape, white flecks scattered in the wind.

ii,

I set my father into the ground in October. He would have been 71.

It was a whirlwind of a weekend, of a week, really. Gatherings every night, friends and family buzzing in the house all day, as if the collective strength of so many silent prayers might summon him, Christ-like, into our midst.

Flying was my dad's first love. I was born near the end of his distinguished career as a fighter pilot in the Air Force. He continued flying, commercially, for as long as I lived under his roof.

A fighter's call sign is what the other fighters call them over the radio when flying together. Pragmatically it is a mask for when enemies intercept communication. But to the squadron, there is nothing secret about this identity; it is more a name than their name is. My dad's call sign is— was— Bear. At the memorial gathering, that was the name that rang long after sundown, that echoed in the still desert air. 

Bear was rowdy, gregarious, and virile. Stories about his after-work antics sprang readily to the lips of the guests. Boozy, shirtless memories of he and his fighter friends, boys who aged but never grew up. And then, after the laughs and a moment's pause, they would add sincere praise about Bear the professional. Thoughtful. Whip-smart. Straightforward. Generous. Passionate.

This man they described was familiar enough, but deeply unrecognizable. He bore little resemblance to the temperamental and stern authority of my childhood memories. Even less to the man I knew on equal footing, after several medical emergencies brought an early and unceremonious end to a lifetime in the cockpit.

I would have liked Bear, I think, but I never met him— I knew him too late.

i,

There are many stories to tell of my father, the man-who-was-not-Bear. I never know which one to start with.

I once asked my mom if I could paint my nails red. I don't remember my mother wearing colored nail polish, it must have been a neighbor who I saw, and the idea enchanted me. And yet somehow, there was the bottle, right underneath the phone. It would have been so easy. But mom said no, dad would be furious. And we both knew that was the end of that.

I liked my hair long. My parents did not. They tolerated it, in the way that one tolerates such inconsequential teenage lashings-out. But the frequency of snide remarks would increase in proportion with its length, and roughly every 6 months I would give in.

(When I was older, I discovered that my hair actually would not get much longer than that. After about 9 months, I shed.)

And if I could see you, I would see these stories fall lighter on your brow than on they lay on my psyche. And I would be suddenly tempted to strike cheap, to scowl forty-five and let sympathy roll in. But it’s too… it’s dehumanizing, and it’s not even narratively right— it doesn’t describe the heft of the uncertainty he left me with, any more than a dumbbell thrown at your face conveys the weight of a blanket.

The household I grew up in was reductivist when not mechanistic, and my childhood gave but scant framework to understand the impact of a thousand unremarkable moments. Still, human, I could not divert myself from the creation of my personal mythology, grasping at any explanation for those forces of parental nature. Nor from this private, shameful conclusion: that this love is, perhaps, conditional. Not necessarily. But the threat was there, and I, conflict-shy, colored inside the lines.

Dharys was 29 when my father died. Or maybe he was 2. (...let's not think too hard about that one.) In any case, my father never met Dharys, and for this alone I still grieve. In the dark I wonder if he ever had these feelings about Bear— this bridgeless chasm between us, etched in time. The quiet, tugging sadness that I would never know him as he was.

Perhaps he never could have, I reason, hopefully. Tieflings learn young, after all, how to hide. Perhaps Dharys can only live because not-Bear has died.

Or perhaps he knew me too early.

* * *

A/N: The picture in this post was drawn by @parziivale; I'll be posting about it separately.

[wainswright]

Mockery… like how site used to use everything as a dunk?

[autogyne-redacted]

Let's Talk About Security Culture: Why Keeping Secrets is Cool and Sexy

It's a natural impulse -- if you love crime -- to want to talk about how great it is. And if you hate America, it's only natural to want to share your dreams for its future with the rest of tumblr dot com. It can feel brave and transgressive. And there is a drive to share your soul with the world at the heart of social media. Surely I should be posting the most concrete implications of my politics, right? This is the poster's curse.

Security Culture refers to a set of "best practices" developed over the past several decades, largely (in a US context) coming out of radical environmental groups as they faced intense state repression, infiltration and entrapment. If you're not familiar, there's some fascinating crimethinc write ups to give you a window into that world:

Much of it boils down to: don't talk about crimes, past or forthcoming with people who don't need to know about them, and be mindful of the possibility of surveillance and infiltration. And, we can support each other as a community in minimizing risks, with an eye towards enabling bold action rather than getting bogged down in fears and anxieties. The guidelines that make sense for AG-based trouble-makers are different from the guidelines that make sense for posters, but plenty of common principles apply. To speak briefly to our position here as posters:

First, it bears saying that long term anonymity is nearly impossible to maintain. Unless you've never accessed Tumblr without a vpn, and avoided connections with other ppl who can be associated with you/your location, and never shared pictures without scrubbing metadata, and a bunch of other 100% consistent steps, it's trivial for the state to know who you are.

Second, just because something isn't actively being prosecuted now doesn't mean it can't be prosecuted later. The priorities of the state change and a shift in power towards the right or a growth in radical action from the left can suddenly make it a priority to destroy anarchist networks or just find a few ppl to prosecute as examples (who probably weren't that plugged into larger networks before getting arrested). Advocating for specific anti-government crimes or declarations of intent to commit such crimes are likely prosecutable, and even if charges don't stick, they're an easy vector for legal harassment.

Third, it's worth thinking about heat as separate from prosecutability. There are modes of engagement that may not be directly criminalized but signal that you are someone worth watching. Some people choose to be public in ways that make heat unavoidable. But it's worth noting that heat isn't strictly individualized, that it persists over time but also is going to shrink over time.

It's easy on here, ime, to see yourself as a proud member of the crime fandom but not much of a content creator. And it's easy to feel like you've generated an amount of heat where you're locked into that role. But heat you generated 10 years ago is probably pretty well gone. Heat you generated 5 years ago has faded substantially. It's worth thinking about how the world might shift in the coming years and what doors you want to keep open.

The non-individualized nature of heat also means that leaning into the spiciest of anti-state positions will make it a bad idea for people who are acting out those positions end up tied to you. Loudly talking about how "more people should be doing [X/Y/Z]" unfortunately sets you up to remain distant from people who might be doing or thinking about doing such things.

Which brings me back to: keeping secrets is sexy. Not spelling everything out builds intrigue. You can lay out a theoretical position and leave working out the practical implications of that as an exercise for the reader. There's value in opacity. The poster's curse and the drive to confess are extremely convenient for the state, but we can resist them. We can hold dreams in our hearts that we refuse to offer up to the posting spectacle.

[pumpkinpaix]

Chapter Spotlight 8:

"'Censorship Made It Better': Anti-Fans and Purity Culture in English-Language Chen Qing Ling Fandom" by Abby Springman

Describe your topic/chapter in one sentence/one meme/140 characters.

Rejoice! MDZS has been cancelled!

What drew you to this topic?

When I got into CQL fandom and started lurking on its outskirts on Twitter, I started getting this weird sense of déjà vu. There was this bizarre similarity between the arguments I was seeing about the aspects of CQL/MDZS and their fandoms being "problematic" from a progressive, social justice point of view and the demands for censorship in American libraries that conservative groups were (and still are) making at an alarmingly increasing rate. In an attempt to make sense of this, I fell down what ended up being a really long rabbit hole, and, well, here we are.

Was there anything you were surprised to discover while researching?

I was surprised by the wide variety of fannish backgrounds found amongst members of English-language CQL fandom! I'm not used to seeing so many different "areas" of fandom intersect over a single piece of media like this. Some folks are primarily into the live action movies and TV shows side of things, some are mostly in bandom, some (like me) are traditionally a part of the anime, manga, and gaming contingent, etc. I think that's fascinating, honestly.

Did researching/writing your chapter change how you saw the text, the fandom, or the media? How so?

I didn't use the block button on Tumblr or Twitter for anyone in the fandom while I was working on my chapter. It definitely changed how I saw fandom on those platforms—literally. It really highlighted how much power social media algorithms have over what kind of content is presented to us front and center.

If there’s one thing you hope the fandom takes away from your article, what would it be?

I'll be thrilled if it makes people think about "problematic" content in less black-and-white terms. They don't have to necessarily agree with my conclusions! But if my words make even one person stop and think more about context before posting a reactionary comment, then that would be great.

If you were isekai-ed into MDZS/CQL, what sect affiliation would you choose and why?

The Lan. My existing skills are most likely to be applicable there (see: the library), it seems easy to find some peace and quiet when you need it, there are bunnies, and Hanguang-jun is there.

Chaotic one-sentence pitch to get your friends into MDZS/CQL?

My elevator pitch for CQL has historically been, "It's the adaptation of a book about a gay necromancer, except they can't actually show the gay romance or the zombies on screen."

What is one (1) book/media you would recommend to a MDZS/CQL fan? Tell us about it.

Strange Tales from a Chinese Studio by Pu Songling. It's probably the most accessible collection of Chinese stories of the supernatural available in English. If MDZS/CQL was your first exposure to traditional Chinese cultural beliefs about ghosts, exorcisms, and the like, this is a great introduction to the less xianxia-specific aspects. If that isn't the case for you, I still highly recommend it on its own merits!

Character you keep getting in those "which MDZS/CQL character are you" quizzes?

Wen Ning

Anything to say to potential readers of the collection?

Thank you, and I'm sorry—no, that's a joke. More seriously, I really am thankful for anyone interested in the collection. It's the product of years of hard work by many people, and I'm sure there's an interesting chapter in there for everyone.

(FAQ) (all posts on Catching Chen Qing Ling)

[anistarrose]

I want to make my posts more accessible, but can't write IDs myself: a guide

[Plain text: "I want to make my posts more accessible, but can't write IDs myself: a guide." End plain text.]

While every image posted online should be accessible in an ideal world, we all know it 1) takes time to learn how to write image descriptions, and 2) is easy to run out of spoons with which to write IDs. And this says nothing of disabilities that make writing them more challenging, if not impossible — especially if you're a person who benefits from IDs yourself.

There are resources for learning how to write them (and if you already know the basics, I'd like to highlight this good advice for avoiding burnout) — but for anyone who cannot write IDs on their original posts at any current or future moment, for any reason, the there are two good options for posting on Tumblr.

1. Crowdsource IDs through the People's Accessibility Discord

[Plain text: "1. Crowdsource IDs through the People's Accessibility Discord". End plain text.]

The People's Accessibility Discord is a community that volunteers description-writing (and transcript-writing, translation, etc) for people who can't do so themselves, or feel overwhelmed trying to do so. Invite link here (please let me know if the link breaks!)

The way it works is simple: if you're planning to make an original post — posting art, for example — and don't know how to describe it, you can share the image there first with a request for a description, and someone will likely be able to volunteer one.

The clear upside here (other than being able to get multiple people's input, which is also nice) is that you can do this before making the Tumblr post. By having the description to include in your post from the start, you can guarantee that no inaccessible version of the post will be circulated.

You can also get opinions on whether a post needs to be tagged for flashing or eyestrain — just be able to spoiler tag the image or gif you're posting, if you think it might be a concern. (Also, refer here for info on how to word those tags.)

The server is very chill and focused on helping/answering questions, but if social anxiety is too much of a barrier to joining, or you can't use Discord for whatever reason, then you can instead do the following:

2. Ask for help on Tumblr, and update the post afterwards

[Plain text: "Ask for help on Tumblr, and update the post afterwards". End description.]

Myself and a lot of other people who describe posts on this site are extra happy to provide a description if OP asks for help with one! This does leave the post inaccessible at first, so to minimize the drawbacks, the best procedure for posting an image you can't fully describe would be as follows:

Create the tumblr post with the most bare-bones description you can manage, no matter how simple (something like "ID: fanart of X character from Y. End ID" or "ID: a watercolor painting. End ID," or literally whatever you can manage)

Use a tool like Google Lens or OCR to extract text if applicable and if you have the energy, even if the text isn't a full image description (ideally also double-check the transcriptions, because they're not always perfect)

Write in the body of the post that you'd appreciate a more detailed description in the notes!

Tag the post as "undescribed" and/or "no id" only if you feel your current, bare-bones description is missing out on a lot of important context

When you post it and someone provides an ID, edit the ID into the original post (don't use read mores, italics, or small text)

Remove the undescribed tag, if applicable. If you're posting original art, you can even replace it with a tag like "accessible art" for visibility!

And congrats! You now have a described post that more people will be able to appreciate, and you should certainly feel free to self-reblog to give a boost to the new version!

[plow-and-propose]

Orange Flags (found in any post but especially ones about politics)

We don't always have the time and/or energy to do our own research, so here are some things to watch out for:

No sources. Obviously this doesn't 100% guarantee that the post contains misinformation but it does mean you can't easily verify it. Is OP right? Wrong? Outright lying? You don't know!

Contradicting sources in the notes. Again, doesn’t necessarily mean that OP is wrong, but you should absolutely do your own research before sharing if several different people are providing contradictory evidence.

'Unreliable' sources. What constitutes as unreliable depends a bit on context but be especially wary of unsourced screenshots (could be taken out of context), clearly biased sources (e.g. 'Nationalist News of [Country]' type newspapers), and second hand sources (e.g. a different, unsourced tumblr post).

Minor mistakes. Like an incorrect statistic, an exaggerated number, or a omitted detail - something fairly small. Maybe OP just misremembered or forgot about this one thing, but it could be a sign they've made an error or lied about something far more major.

Urgency. Obviously there is a lot of reason for urgency when dealing with crises, but if a post gives you the vibe of go go go there's no time to explain share this give money do it now don't think about it go then OP may not have stopped to check their sources, or even be actively using urgency to mislead you.

And lastly here's a tip: if you're not sure, save the post as a draft. More information might become available later.

Stopping the spread of misinformation is hard. We all want to help and sharing posts feels like a very quick and easy way to do it. But it's also very easy to share the wrong thing by mistake. Try to stop and think.

Source for this post: my own experience. These are things I've picked up over many years of being gullible online. I highly encourage you to take the time to educate yourself about how to stop the spread of misinformation.

[lukolabrainrot]

Calm theory anon here.. I've been busy with life but I checked in and I want to share some thoughts I have been having. Pictures are just a moment in time. I can look at a picture and think wow this couple really looks happy and you can look at a picture and say 0h wow there is sadness in their eyes I wonder what happened. People interpret differently and that's the beauty of everybody having their own mind. So you've seen a lot of photos, right with Nicola and Luke this summer. And we've seen twice now where people have misinterpreted situations. One pate gate people assumed that Luke didn't mind the photos, and that was due to the pictures we got. Later on someone put the photos together and a different story was told. Another circumstance the Nicola and JD picture we didn't get the photos in order and what happened assumed that she was just hugging him. As More pictures dropped we seen that they were actually taking a photo together. That's two times now that we've misinterpreted a photo. And that's fine because we all say this is theory. No one knows what actively going on. Not any of these big creators on Tumblr not any of these big creators on TikTok not any of these big creators on Instagram not any of these creators on Twitter. Not one of these people actively know Luke or Nic. All they're doing is taking a set of photos and likes and assuming situations. But as we've already established, there is something called misinterpretation. so anything you see or read can be a product of misinterpretation. Guys feelings and love aren't easy things to understand. Think about the last time you were in love. I was so confused and the feelings were scary. It was the best and hardest thing I ever dealt with. But imagine someone from the outside that doesn't know you trying to understand your feelings for each other. That's just impossible. Luke and Nic are people. They are dealing with feelings most of us have never dealt with seeing as I believe they are soul mates. I truly feel they will find their way.

💯

Ok I am going to say a few things, and I know my comments are going to blow up probably, but I need to get this off my chest:

Me, and NONE of the other creators on SM, actually know L and N, or any of the people in their lives. We are all coming to our own interpretation based on PUBLICLY AVAILABLE INFORMATION. None of us have some special inside scoop into L or N's life, and no one should take our word as gospel! I share my opinions on what I am seeing, but I can't definitively say what is going on BTS, or predict the future. I think because we have a lot more questions than answers, we just want to know what is going on BTS. But we are never going to know that full story, and we have to be okay with that. We need to just let them cook, and see what happens.

I have mentioned this multiple times, but my background is in psychology and studying human behavior. I have also mentioned how ~70%-90% of human communication is non verbal. And L/N's non verbal cues speak VOLUMES and is the reason a lot of us are still here. I've talked about this a LOT on here, so feel free to scroll through my page and see my thoughts.

But it was all PR, right?? It wasn't. IMPOSSIBLE. The end.

I try to look at the FULL picture of ALL the publicly available information I have before coming to my interpretation. Yes, I have had a few little freak out moments, but I try not to fixate on a single moment in time, or a single post or interaction on SM. I try to look at everything in context of the bigger picture. And if you look at the larger picture, a lot of the information is pointing to L/N being a lot closer to getting together and going public at some point in the near future. This is my opinion though of course, and it is alright if some of you don't share my opinion.

I think a major reason I decided to start this blog is because I was having a lot of thoughts that I wanted to share around L/N and try and put a psychological lens on what might be going on BTS and what we saw during the PR tour. Another reason I started the blog though is because I have NEVER seen a connection like L/N, or seen people respond so positively to two people just interacting with each other. I am a VERY jaded person, and do not think super highly of the human species. I also have never believed in soulmates, but L/N are the closest example I have ever seen in my life. Yes I don't know them. And yes, I KNOW it sounds sappy. Trust me. I NEVER thought I would end up here today shipping two celebrities I have never met. But watching the way these two publicly interact almost felt like I had run into a unicorn or fairy in the wild. And by THAT I mean this. It is SO rare to see two people publicly show their affection and love for each other the way L/N do. Humans aren't great at it. Period. So I think we fell in love with the way they love each other (at least I know I did) because it is so rare to see, and makes us a little more hopeful. And that, and ALL the other publicly available information I have seen, is why I am firmly sat. I want to see how this movie ends, because I feel like when the PR tour ended, the movie stopped partway.

Lastly, if you do not ship Lukola, MY BLOG IS NOT FOR YOU. Also, if you find yourself spiraling over every new piece of information, this shipping space is probably not the healthiest thing for you. I feel like ultimately, shipping should be fun and not taken too seriously since we're just fans and we don't actually know these people. If you find that you are getting really stressed and not having a lot of fun anymore, it is definitely valid to take a step back. And it is fine if you have a different opinion than me or someone in the comments, BUT PLEASE BE RESPECTFUL. I am going to start blocking more people who are trolling in the comments. Ya ain't slick, people can see you 👀

[st4rrygrl]

The blatant lies in plagues (@/blood.plagues) "explanation" and more allegations. (Part 1)

While reading plagues explanation on @/seireitonin's post, multiple people found the inconsistent lies on both his text messages and also the posts that his friends made to defend him. This post will be separated into multiple points.

1) Talking to minors inappropriately.

"The only other supposed proof of him being 'flirty' was towards adults who consented."

This is from one of his friends posts made to address the situation, while *some* of the images in seireitonin's post were taken out of context, there are MANY examples of plague making sexual jokes towards minors, even if they aren't moderators or his friends.

One of these examples was already posted by @/t4tesmuu (you can check their reblog for more information, it's really insightful.) and @/insomniac-shado.

The translation for the message was "Are you a guitar or why do i wanna grab you by the neck". Even if this was a joke, it's completely out of pocket and genuinely disturbing. There is no reason for an adult man to be talking to minors this way even if its a joke.

More screenshots down below. Some of the screenshots will say "yesterday" but the actual timeline would've been somewhere in July.

Keep in mind that turtle, cass, ? and Moew are all MINORS. There were more situations, specifically with one of his mods who is FOURTEEN but the channels and messages were deleted, I assume out of fear.

There is literally no world where talking to minors sexually or inappropriately even as a joke should be accepted. Some of the conversations we saw in his server that are now deleted were genuinely scary. It's insane how people will defend his behaviour because either he hasn't done it to them, or because he tells them it's okay because he "asked for permission". Again, if you have to ask permission to make a joke, then there's no reason to make it. I'd argue there's no reason for plague to be interacting with minors as friends either way, because of the major power imbalance. Many minors will see his behaviour and think its normal because they look up to him.

Again, there's no reason for him to make these jokes just because his humor is like that. If you can't control the things you say around minors, then you shouldn't be around them at all. All of this could've been avoided had he made his server 18+ or just.. kept his distance with minors. There are many more screenshots that I have, but due to tumblrs 10 image limit per post, you can ask for them in DMs.

And again, I'm sorry, but i can't state this enough, there is NO REASON for him to make these jokes. it doesn't matter if they're friends, it doesn't matter if they consented to it, because at the end of the day, MINORS CANNOT CONSENT. He could've just not made those jokes in the first place. I don't know what was going on in his head before sending these images. As an adult, you shouldn't even feel the urge to make inappropriate jokes towards/in the presence of minors.

To anyone who's going to defend this behaviour by saying "but minors make sexual jokes all the time!" there's a big difference. Plague is an ADULT directing these "jokes" towards his minor "friends". There's really no way i can explain it to tell people why it's wrong because it's literally common sense. Plague is incredibly immature for acting this way and doubling down on it instead of admitting his mistakes and deleting the server entirely.

Many of his friends in their borderline ai generated statements have mentioned that these jokes are "private", which is a fucking lie lmfao. You can literally find all of these messages in his server unless he's taken them down by now. There are probably so many more that we missed because plague just loves deleting chats and channels out of fear that people would take them out of context. No amount of context that he can give can explain WHY he wants to make these jokes so bad. It's so fucking easy to just.... not make a vore joke to a 15 year old.

2) His "Dark and Sexual Humour"

- Plague has admitted **multiple** (and I mean a lot like at the LEAST 20 separate occasions) times that he has "dark and sexual" humor. Some of his humor includes being weirdly obsessed with black men for some reason??? as I am not black, I got my friend Laila (who is black) to offer their statements on the images below.

"Hiii so im here to speak on the whole plague and his weird obsession with black men. This makes me feel like im a fucking joke to him, like "i head cannon toby to send pictures of black men while someone is venting" what the fuck plague. I am black and I take HUGE FUCKING OFFENSE to this?? like are we seriously a joke to you plague?? nothing is funny about fetishizing black people, like this is seriously so offensive and heartbreaking because genuinely what was going through your brain when making these jokes. And don't even blame this on your "dark and sexual humor" when this is just straight up racism?? The way you find black men literally just existing so funny is odd to me, and its really odd you did this stuff ONLY with black men. you could have chosen german or white men to make fun of, but NO you decided for black men to be the butt of your "dark and sexual humor". Also you joking about saying the n word??? Like thats not something to even joke about even if you meant "nitro". Like fym "I pause trying not to say the n word"...?? Plague be so serious with yourself, you aren't funny at all. Saying something like that is **EXTREMELY FUCKING OFFENSIVE TO THE BLACK COMMUNITY JOKE OR NOT PLAGUE.** ANYONE that tries to defend this is definitely not fucking black like I don't want to hear ANYONES say on this unless your black. If you're not black you get to have ZERO say on this. Plague, please leave the fucking internet and never come back you walking biohazard."

I also want to say that if you are NOT BLACK then you don't have a say on this. It is not your place as a white/non-black person to decide whether or not these "jokes" are racist. Stay in your lane because it had nothing to do with you. It doesn't matter if it was just a joke, it's still offensive and disturbing.

- Another thing he's done is just straight up say a homophobic slur towards lesbians. This was on August 10th, of THIS YEAR. This happened THIS MONTH. There is no way to explain yourself for this one, it's not funny, nor is it amusing nor does it fall under "Dark humor"; and you can't say you were "ignorant" either. Using dark humor as a way to shield yourself from being outed as a fucking freak will harm you in the long run. A statement from one of my friends:

"Hey, i wanted to talk about plauge saying a slur towards lesbians. Plauge is a boy, BOYS CANT BE LESBIAN, he should never even use that word at all. As a Lesbian, people shouldn't use those types of slurs, since it's only used to harm someone. If the slur has been said once, it sure has been said MULTIPLE times. Lying about others saying unreclaimable slurs while you say unreclaimable slurs is kinda crazy, since you were being so confident about!! Plauge is NOT a child, he's an adult. He should know better than to do these type of things, especially since he has a big following and most of them are minors. He should NEVER say slurs that he cant reclaim, even as a joke, because that's just offensive. There is no excuse. His 'dark and sexual humor' means NOTHING."

Also, for the uninformed people, bisexual people CANNOT say derogatory lesbian slurs. It's a very simple concept that is easy to understand. If you're not a lesbian then you can't say slurs against lesbians. I don't know how his friends are defending this because it's literally insane.

There is literally no way plague could justify these things. Borderline racism and homophobia is NOT dark humor, plague. the only way to get out of these is if you formally apologize and delete your social media presence. like please be honest with yourself, there is no way you could explain yourself for these other than you're legitimately dense and stupid.

3) Spreading lies about people.

- When a group of people first *tried* to come out with this information, plague immediately shut them down and started spreading fake allegations about them. He said that they doxxed people, they tried doxxing him, they sent gore to people, they make nsfw jokes towards minors (they're all 14), that they're n@z!s, and that they say slurs they can't reclaim. All of these are obvious lies, he got these accusations from one of his moderators who told him MULTIPLE times that it wasn't them, and that they were talking about other people. Despite this, he KEPT spreading this even after they apologised to him. When seirei came out with her post about this, he blamed it on that group of people while saying the same stuff about them and when someone corrected him, he didn't respond or elaborate.

- After seirei came out with her post and deleted the tiktok videos, plagues minions went out and made multiple tumblr posts "debunking" the allegations and essentially calling seirei ableist when that wasn't her fault, it was the anon's fault. They blamed her for "mishandling" the situation (which literally just means they didn't want her coming out abt this) and said that she was irresponsible and immature. They also just straight up said that seirei admitted that the situation was "petty" about this situation with no proof or evidence, so it's safe to say that they were lying about this as well.

- 2 specific people who had been part of this situation got ran off of social media due to the constant harassment from one of plagues moderators, Asher. One of these people was TWELVE. They harassed a TWELVE year old off of social media because they spread lies about them. That is genuinely disgusting behaviour. They lied about them making fun of asher getting groomed, which never happened, nor do they have proof of. Asher also made a video on tiktok where they basically dissed one of the people in the caption and people shit talked them in the comments. It's hard to tell whether or not he told asher to do this, but considering he made a server just to shit talk the people he doesn't like (specifically the people who are vocal about this) I wouldn't be surprised.

My final statement: there will probably be another post about this in a few days with MORE screenshots and evidence. if people want, I'll make a reblog with more screenshots. I'm aware that this is all discord drama but the things that plague and his company are doing and defending are NOT okay and shouldn't be left unchecked. These people have harassed and lied and gaslighted so many people that its genuinely terrifying. I will not be taking this post down nor will I hear any "explanation" about this. We have all the context we need and won't take this down.

Also, about plagues ridiculous conspiracy theory that everyone who's being vocal about this is the same group of people, I just wanna let people know that this is NOT true. A lot of people are working together to gather more evidence, and those people all have different experiences with plague and his server. Just because they're all cooperating doesn't mean it stems from the same people. The fact that there's 60+ people messaging seirei about this already proves that there's a lot of victims of his immature behaviour.

The only plague can make people let go of this is if he deletes his entire social media presence, including his server. If you're gonna defend this behaviour, just know that you're defending a legitimate freak. You will be blocked if you try to spread misinformation.

[katyspersonal]

Guys oh my gosh hgbghgg I am a GENIUS! I've finally figured an explanation for, at the first glance, unreasonable vitriol towards Godrick in the fandom! I should have became a psychology professor for this one but don't let me get ahead of myself ok so:

Like.. This can't be the fact that Godrick literally steals peoples limbs to attach to himself, right? Rykard does a similar thing - consumes people and makes them a part of his body, as all those arms sticking out of him are those of his victims. Also both of these characters appear hard to take seriously upon introduction; "i cOmAnD tHeE KNEEL" and "tOGETHAAAA" are equally silly xd But Rykard is really loved, right?

The difference between the two might happen because Rykard is that cool badass rebel against oppressive system, whereas Godrick willingly perpetuates it. But that can't be this piece, and this also can't be Tarnished-hunting. Because another character who simps for the Golden Order and is racist Tarnished-hunts is Morgott, who is also very loved. Adored, even!

I thought maybe Godrick hit the 'disrespecting women' nerve upon insulting Malenia, which is already a sore topic in the fandom? 🤔 But this is likely not true. Not only he himself is definitely not an incel, since Grafted Scions (his children) exist, but also it is all likely an insecurity. Godrick had that line where he called Malenia and Miquella "rank and malformed" when Godrick himself could be considered a disgrace ( 🥁 ) for the Golden Bloodline with his frail, weak build. He has large insecurities that he takes out on other discriminated people, so that certainly wasn't her gender. Again, many other loved characters also disrespect us for who we are, he isn't outstanding. Nor it is him being "pathetic" for escaping the battle he could not win in disguise or kissing Malenia's feet in apology: the 'pathetic old man' is ABSOLUTELY one of the favorite men types on Tumblr and Twitter! The girls (gender neutral) LOVE the 'pathetic old man', that vibe could not have provoked the hate.

Finally, it can't be the authors intention. Miyazaki confirmed Godrick to be a sympathetic character. So, you should feel bad for his situation of continuing the glory of that imposing bloodline that he is not fit for, and NPCs that dislike him are either within their own right to do so, or straight up hypocritical (like Kenneth). Subtexts, media literacy and so on can't be used as an arguement for why Godrick would be intended as repulsive character.

So... Yeah, it seems like there is no real reason for why Godrick should always be singled out, only brought up as a laughing stock, always brought in negative and mocking context in polls and headcanons compilation and bring his fans being seen as weirdos by an effect, right? Whatever reasoning might be the first responce is very easy to debunk! I think I've finally found an actual reasonable and sympathetic explanation as to why fandom dislikes and bullies him so much more than any other character that explains EVERYTHING! I am going to go under cut as this is the result of long, meticulous thinking and this post is already getting long, so here it is:

💫🌺 S K I L L!!! I S S U E!!! 💕🔥💫

[anghraine]

I've been moving and navigating further departmental nonsense etc (my pseudo-dissertation got approved for defending, though! l o l). But it was interesting to see the Worst P&P Takes poll I reblogged accumulating more results and the general tenor of responses in the notes.

I mean, the results are definitely to be expected if you're familiar with the side of Austen fandom doing a lot of the reblogging etc. But still, interesting!

Many Tumblr polls specify that they're asking about personal preferences that may be irrational—favorite/least favorite, coolest/most annoying, or something like that. This one, though, asked for the worst interpretation of P&P, not the most annoying one—and the current leader is "Darcy is never really proud, he's just shy and probably has anxiety" against some very steep competition on the Bad Takes front.

I was thinking about why that seemed a kind of tediously predictable choice even though I agree that the take is wrong, and realized that while I do disagree with the shy Darcy interpretation and I particularly disagree with the specific formulation where he is never proud at all, it ultimately feels to me like a failure of nuance rather than just completely wrongheaded like some of the others. And this is probably my fundamental difference with a lot of Darcy takes I see!

In my opinion, a character who is introverted and who feels awkward in various social situations and who doesn't like common social activities and who has to work himself up to talking to his crush and who is repeatedly suggested to behave very differently in contexts where he's more comfortable being interpreted as shy and anxious is not that big of a leap.

Yes, it's important that he is actually fundamentally confident and haughty, that he makes his personal feelings of discomfort other people's problem, and that he thinks he's such a unique and special butterfly that he doesn't need to even put in an effort outside his personal social circle. But it's a misreading that is easy to follow (and long predates the 2005 P&P, as I've mentioned before!).

The additional misreading that a shy and anxious Darcy is also never proud at all is a much more drastic leap, and in my experience, condemnations of shy Darcy interpretations rarely differentiate between "Darcy is shy as well as arrogant" and "Darcy is shy rather than arrogant" as interpretations (although their basic arguments are quite different). But even that as the worst possible misreading of P&P when Darcy is not even the main character is ?????????

I mean, for one alternative (not even the one I voted for!), the idea that Elizabeth is an author avatar Mary Sue seems a far worse misreading of P&P than basically anything to do with Darcy at all. The center piece of the entire novel is Elizabeth's epiphany of self-knowledge about her own shortcomings that do not particularly resemble Austen's at all, but were ethically a concern for her, and she's a complex, interesting character in general whom Austen correctly regarded as a major achievement. Inverting that into Elizabeth as an improbably perfect, reality-warping self-insert is deeply wrong and frankly pretty misogynistic as well.

(ngl though, it's a little funny to see such a blatantly terrible reading of Elizabeth rank so far behind the shy Darcy votes. I've gotten "does anyone actually think/say that?" so many times on my posts about Austen fandom's prioritization of Darcy's character development over Elizabeth's and yet...)

And even just going with the Darcy-centric misreadings, the idea of Darcy as a "bad boy" seems easily the most absolutely wrong take on him. His pride is at least complicated and the finer points can be fairly debated and it's a quality that actually changes somewhat throughout the novel, and you can have discussion over what happened when, whose testimonies should be weighted more, etc. But there is no point at which "bad boy" isn't utterly wrong for him. However, there's definitely a tendency in some wings of the fandom to find the idea of Darcy being misread too favorably more objectionable than him being read too unfavorably, regardless of the particulars, so it's not a surprise.

I suppose you could argue about what "worst" means in the context of variously bad interpretations. Like, is an interpretation that is about a fairly trivial aspect of the book but extremely wrong about it "worse" than an interpretation that is pretty bad but at least comprehensibly so about something very important?

[saltydkdan]

Salty i wanna get into Baki which one do you recommend,the manga or the anime?

Oh you just woke up the fucking beast (I'm so sorry).

I LOVE this question, and as a recent Baki fan myself, I can tell you that getting into the series as a Western consumer can be rough if you don’t have a basic guide to know what you’re getting into…. so that’s what I’m gonna make this post (TEEHEE).

This series has gotta be one of the most insane shonen- actually no- one of the most INSANE PIECES OF FICTION I've ever experienced, and I NEED more people to check it out. Like, LOOK AT THIS SHIT DUDE.

Baki out of context somehow even puts Jojo's Bizarre Adventure to shame. The way I usually pitch it to people is that Baki is as insane as people THINK Jojo is before they read it. Shit is just... MAN LMAO. OBAMA IS FUCKING IN THIS.

Unlike more popular stuff like Dragon Ball and Hunter x Hunter, a lot of this series has just never been officially localized, so knowing where to start, and even how to support the series, is a hard task if you don’t know what you’re doing.

Thankfully THAT’S WHAT YOU HAVE ME FOR. This Tumblr post is gonna be your one stop shop for how to get into Baki as an English speaker (and it’ll give me some space to ramble about one of my latest favorite series).

But uh before we get into the nitty gritty, wanna put some trigger warnings for the series for those who may want to know. Listen, I know how some of these are gonna look to the average person, but this series just be like that sometimes, if you can’t take stuff like this trust me it’s insanely valid. You’ll understand if you choose to take the plunge.

SERIES TRIGGER WARNINGS:

Animated Blood/Violence, some animated gory imagery, Incest (???), Nudity, Urine stuff, Bigfoot/Animal Violence, Death, Uncomfortable looking muscles, and one instance of sexual violence (offscreen)

If you are comfortable with all that (and again, valid as fuck if you aren’t) then let’s talk BAKI!

First off, Manga or Anime?

You would think that either would be fine, but my personal recommendation for Baki as a beginner, is to watch the anime over reading the manga. Simply put: The anime is a lot more widely available and accessible in English speaking territories, and is fairly easy to support officially with its current iteration.

For whatever reason, the manga just never really took off in the West when compared to other series, so it was only ever officially released in English a handful of times, and they only ended up publishing the first few volumes. Theoretically, you can read the first few books to start, but the entire series all together is legit longer than One Piece at a whopping 1,203 chapters, so you are gonna run out of material real quick. The fraction of officially available manga barely scratches the surface of the series.

Even if you’re stubborn about reading the manga and want to try reading fan translations, they come with their own separate batch of issues. Plenty of fan scans you can find online range from wildly outdated, to generally being poor quality at best. There’s even some fan translations that just straight up make shit up and don’t even properly translate the original script. Adding in extra dialogue and slurs randomly to make the text seem way edgier than it actually is.

Full disclosure, I wanna cut through my bias here and say that there are indeed some great scans available on the internet if you look hard enough, especially for the more recent content! But they aren’t super easy to track down with how the series is formatted, and you may accidentally find yourself reading the story out of its proper order.

The watch/read order of Baki is a bit of a toughie for new people, but is actually pretty simple once it’s explained. The story of Baki is split up into multiple different series, kind of similar in format to Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure. Though instead of “Parts”, Baki is split up into completely different manga and TV series. This is why many fans get confused initially, especially with the watch order, because it isn’t laid out in an easy to understand way at first glance.

The most well known series are currently streaming on Netflix, but those aren’t the ones you wanna start with. Nope, the story of the Baki anime actually starts way back in 2001, in a TV show that isn’t streaming officially online. Now if you want to watch out of order, I’m not gonna stop you. You can do whatever you want, by all means, but you’re gonna be missing some VERY important story context, and some characters just won’t hold the same weight.

So if you DO want to watch in order, come with me my friend. Let me show you-

BAKI’S SUPER COOL AND NOT AT ALL CONFUSING WATCH ORDER:

Baki the Grappler (2001) (24 episodes)

This is the original 2001 anime adaptation, the very start of serialized Baki anime. You’re gonna wanna start here trust me.

This series isn’t streaming anywhere officially online, but you can find it… places. Seek it out, trust me, because otherwise you’re gonna pay way too much for out of print DVDs on Ebay. Thankfully though you have options! The series is both subbed and dubbed (as well as every series I discuss from this point forward.

This show is the very start of serialized Baki anime, the very beginning of Baki Hanma’s story. Although it’s not in the way you may think. Despite this being the earliest point in the Baki timeline, it’s actually an adaptation of a later story arc from the manga.

Now I know what you’re thinking, “Didn’t you just say this is where I should start? Why is it adapting something from later in the story?”, and yeah it’s valid to be confused. While yes this is the first ever Baki anime, for some reason the staff behind it made the decision to move this later arc up a bit from the original manga. In my honest opinion, I feel like this is actually a great decision.

As you will see as you watch, this honestly FEELS like this should be where the story begins. The escalation of power and storytelling from this point onward feels very natural, and you won’t miss out on anything or spoil yourself whatsoever on later events.

This is the de facto best starting point.

Grappler Baki Maximum Tournament (2001) (24 episodes)

This is effectively the second season of Baki the Grappler. For whatever reason they decided to title it something else, and while this is the norm for the series later on, this name change is weird because it adapts an arc from the original manga just like the first season of anime I just talked about.

Whatever lol.

Anyway this series, much like the previous, isn’t officially available as of now. So your best option is to SEARCH for it. SEARCH on the INTERNET. Or y’know. The good ol’ expensive out of print DVD on Ebay route.

In my opinion, compared to the first season, this one feels a bit slower paced and a bit of a slog at points but HOLD STRONG TRUE BELIEVER. This season is the introduction to a lot of mainstay characters in the series. Many of which you will come to love, even if you don’t know it yet.

BAKI (2018) (39 episodes) (NETFLIX)

This is the modern adaptation of Baki. After the last series ended in 2001, the anime went on hiatus for 17 years before it was announced that it would be coming back with a modern coat of paint.

Contrary to what you may think, this isn’t a ground up reboot. It’s a continuation of the exact point they left off years ago, right after the Maximum tournament. The only thing that kind of sucks about this is that, at least for the English dub, they replaced most of the voice cast. Most of the new VAs do a great job, however you may need to get used to Yujiro Hanma having Shadow the Hedgehog’s modern VA from the games haha.

Thankfully, you can officially support this series easily via Netflix. Normally I’m pretty eh on Netflix as of late, but this being the only way you can support the show officially in the west, I personally recommend it.

Baki Hanma (2023) (39 episodes) (NETFLIX)

This is the most recent anime! It’s also on Netflix.

Me and my friends just got to this on our watchthrough together.

Anyway, this is my list! If after you catch up you wanna hop into the manga and read the fan scans, I’ve heard that you can start on Baki Hanma/Baki Son of Ogre (chapter 183).

Hope you enjoy the funny man punching show! Feel free to report back and tell me how you feel about it (positive OR negative)!

Like I said, I've been watching the series with friends on Discord every night or so when we're free and MAN. Baki is fucking AMAZING WITH FRIENDS. It just never slows down after a certain point, and it just gets stranger and crazier.

[it-lives-within-the-dark]

I really do love SBCL and I really feel like when you read the manga it SO blatantly in your face…but when I read Yana’s old blog it seems like she’s so dead set against Sebastian and Ciel caring for each other at all…that it’s like does she even see what she writers or and I just delulu… or are antis just cherry picking what they translate 😭😭

Hey Nonny!

Short answer:

I'm not familiar enough with Yana's old blog to make any judgements on what her intentions/feelings are for her story and characters based on her posts (not to mention, it's old - people can change their minds).

Long answer:

I go back and forth when it comes to authorial intent and death of the author. I've literally been on both sides of the issue. As a fan, it's easy to say that what the author intended doesn't matter and that my interpretation of their work is 100% valid, even if it's the complete opposite of what the author intended. On the other hand, I've been in the author's shoes. I took a creative writing class in college where one of our assignments was to write a short story and then the class would discuss it. Simple, right? Easy. Except I wasn't allowed to speak the entire time my work was being discussed. I had to bite my tongue for forty minutes while my classmates completely butchered my story, listen to them miss the main theme completely, focus on a random detail that meant nothing, and walk away at the end of class not understanding anything I tried to convey in my work. I never got to explain what it actually meant; all the little clues and details that they missed - nothing. And it sucked. A lot. But at the end of the day there was nothing I could do about it.

All that to say, I think it's up to you to determine what holds more importance: what Yana says in her old posts (keeping in mind the context in which those remarks were made - what year did she make those comments, and where does that line up in the publishing of the manga? - are you taking into consideration that she is a public figure and that she might need to watch her words so that she doesn't jeopardize her job? etc.), or how you personally interpret the work.

I also think it's important to keep in mind that there can be (and is) a difference in what you, the fan, want to see happen, and what you want to actually happen in canon. There's a tumblr post floating around that discusses this topic but I don't have it handy.

Sorry this was all a bit rambly!

[strangestcase]

i think the proship community is dangerous because it encourages the presence and participation of minors in sexually charged contexts (which often leads to them being taken advantage of. who would have guessed the adults defending loli would be a danger to kids)

No exactly, exactly, like… the thing w proship spaces is that they do have good points about media literacy in a vacuum, I think everyone should be against censorship and happily writing about whatever they want. The thing is that pedos will ALWAYS insert their abusive preferences into any political ideology (look up post-Nazi Germany) if they can get away with it— they’ve done it to the left, to the right, to progressives, to conservatives, they always work backwards.

I can’t stress this enough: anything, any ideology, any set of beliefs, can be a twisted into justification to interact inappropriately with kids/teens; anything can be a good reason to coerce a child into sex in an abuser’s eyes. And, as it stands, the statement “there’s nothing wrong with having taboo sexual interests”, true as it is , is FERTILE SOIL for pedo and pedo enablers to take root in. What should drive morality re:children and sex isn’t disgust, isn’t politics, isn’t aesthetics— it’s the fact that children can’t consent to sex because they simply aren’t mature enough to fully understand what it is.

The thing is . Children are intelligent and deserving of autonomy and freedom; taking advantage of their inexperience for sexual purposes is the opposite of giving children autonomy and freedom, but it’s very easy to spin it into a narrative of sexual freedom and children’s rights to have sex with adults (as if that ever happened magically On Its Own, lmao).

I say it very often that “ship discourse” is an incredibly bad way to discuss these sorts of things. Media literacy, censorship, and internet moderation are all very nuanced topics that you can’t divide into little sports-like teams. This sentiment I’ve seen reflected in a lot of other Tumblr users. I’m not anti or pro I’m an adult with a job etc etc . But that said I am immediately distrustful of proship spaces even if I agree with some of their points, much more than I am of anti spaces when I think they also make good points, and the reason is that proship spaces, as Anon says, have taken sexual liberation the wrong way and tend to either not care or be all for children interacting with adults in questionable contexts re:sex. Those spaces make it very easy to groom kids under the guise of kink/queer/sex positivity (which IMO is frankly insulting as a sex positive kinky queer). The end result is a community that is against pedophilia in theory but fails to protect children in practice.

The other reason I favor “antis” over “proships” is because proshippers are (in my experience) annoying as fuck and weirdly high and mighty about liking incest, as if it was subversive. A quick glance at the family tree of Greek mythology characters says otherwise.

[chaotic-neutral-knitter]

tumblr is a blessedly siloed website in that it's generally hard to track down what people are vagueing about bc you can't see their likes or who they follow and backreading someone's blog typically requires scrolling through a lot of unrelated stuff. Honestly? I love this because it saves me from the worst parts of myself.

but it does exacerbate a type of internet argument that I find particularly exhausting, which goes kind of like this:

Person A's dash

B: why do people love coffee so much? it tastes terrible

A: I love coffee

B: wow okay I guess it's illegal to dislike coffee?

A: uhhh no one fucking said it was illegal to dislike coffee?? tf?

Person B's dash

C: I love coffee!

B: why do people love coffee so much? it tastes terrible

A: I love coffee

C: fuck everyone who talks shit about coffee

C: coffee haters DNI

C: if you can't appreciate the bean, go to jail, do not pass Go, do not collect $200

B: wow okay I guess it's illegal to dislike coffee??

A: uhhh no one fucking said it was illegal to dislike coffee?? tf?

Person C's dash

A: I love coffee!

D: if you like coffee you suck

A: I love coffee

D: everyone who drinks coffee is a murderer

C: fuck everyone who talks shit about coffee

C: coffee haters DNI

C: if you can't appreciate the bean, go to jail, do not pass Go, do not collect $200

A: uhhh no one fucking said it was illegal to dislike coffee?? tf?

Anyways sometimes you (B or C) will say something very normal and then you'll see a bunch of angry posting about that same topic, so you'll assume (reasonably) that people are responding to what you said.

But it's also entirely possible that there is a real person (D) standing behind you (B) that is being a huge jerk but all you can see is other people (A and C) responding to it.

Or it could be that the person (B) who seems to be defending the jerk (D) is actually defending a completely different position.

If you don't have the context for what someone is responding to, it's very easy to misinterpret what they're saying. And because everyone has a different dash, we are all working with different context. It's really easy to think that your context is universal and everyone else is being completely unreasonable.

So just, idk. The strawman you think people are arguing with might just be a real guy that you didn't happen to see. And vague posting is something that, by its very nature, is going to hit people who aren't the intended target. We are all working with different information and none of us have the complete picture.

[skyfallscotland]

@heartfeltletters-written asked me 💥 How do you feel about criticism? and it felt like something that needed its own post, so here goes: the hypocrisy of critics in modern fandoms, an essay.

Criticism. I don't like getting it or giving it when it comes to writing. I struggle to even gently give it to friends, even when they ask me what I think of their work. Writing is such a personal thing that we pour our heart and soul into and like you say, many criticisms aren't necessarily valid. By that I mean, there's a difference between "Amy you use em dashes a lot babe" (I do) and "This story would have been so much better if Remi were a virgin" (actual criticism I have received, lmao). 

Unlike traditional authors, we will never make money from this, we do it for the love of it and it's time we will never get back. For some of us, it's time we could be working on our own original manuscripts too. I don't think people who give the second type of criticism are writers, generally. They don't understand the craft and what goes into it. Whenever I post and someone says a chapter was short or they immediately ask when the next one is, and that's all they say, I die inside a little. I try not to take it personally, but it's hard.

Personally, I think fandom behaviour is getting worse and that flows over into our comment sections and tumblr asks. I have a whole other dissertation on this that we’ll call ‘the slow death of fandom as we know it: an essay’, but that’s perhaps for another post. I don’t know how welcomed that commentary would be. 

You said the word ‘entitled’ in your original ask and I think that’s spot on. People have become more entitled in general and downright rude (which is not restricted to online spaces, by the way). I write for ACOTAR, but you’ve never seen me discuss it here because no matter what you say in that regard, you can’t win. Someone will always attack you and I do mean attack. Even in regards to Fourth Wing, I don't talk about my opinions a lot outside of my own little bubble of friends and readers.

And that's the kicker to this whole conversation, really. If I were to criticise Iron Flame/RY everyone would jump down my throat (as has happened on other platforms), even though I'd never say it to her face. Do I stand by my opinions? Absolutely. But it would be rude to tell her them, unless asked. I’m not allowed to (validly) criticise certain elements of her story, a published novel, without being attacked for it, but those same people are fine criticising my work directly to me. Hypocrisy at its finest.

There’s a new influx of people to fandom spaces who are completely unwilling to integrate and completely unwilling to be kind. You mentioned those who criticised your work could have saved themselves the trouble and read the tags, but the thing is: they don’t want to. They can’t be bothered to take five seconds and figure out how they work, to curate their own experience, because that’s what half these people are like. They want an algorithm to do it for them, gods help us.

For me, personally, I'm my biggest critic. I also have raging generalised anxiety, so just posting on the internet is enough to send me spiralling (seriously, I feel sick just typing this out). It's very, very out of my comfort zone and I've been very, very lucky so far to have cultivated the readership I have, full of very like-minded people. Perhaps due to some of the darker content matter. But the second I get harshly worded comments, I get upset.

I don't say that to elicit sympathy, it's just a fact. I get upset about it the same way I would if you were standing in front of me saying it to my face, and for someone with depression and anxiety, that lingers. I'm getting better at laughing at them, but it's like when someone tells you they don't like you and your mum says "just ignore them"—not that easy, right? 

So yeah, I don't mind if you want to tell me I use a lot of em dashes, or that I've used a word incorrectly in context, but I don't need to hear how much you hate original character fic when you could just use your last remaining braincell the back button and continue on with your day. Just be kind, is all I'm saying.

[bignosebaby]

You know her

This little ape is pretty iconic on tumblr, having a niche popularity as a meme from the "and me" post that is around ten years old! That's a long time for this mysterious (and cute) face to circulate.

I get a decent amount of people both in real life and online asking me about her, which makes sense because as a big advocate for primate welfare I can tell you the golden rule is primates are not pets and should not be kept in domestic human contexts. People attuned to the inherent cruelty of keeping primates as pets and raising apes like human children are wary of images like this, because that is exactly what it looks like.

Good news! This baby (as with all babies with Silver Tree Nursery watermarks) is completely fine. Because she's a doll.

Many people know about reborn dolls-- The hyper-realistic baby dolls that look and feel like the real thing-- but not everyone knows that there are also ape reborn dolls. Silver Tree Nursery is a (now defunct) Facebook page for an artist named Gemma who painted and customized reborn dolls and specialized in apes. The artist behind this doll has done several orangutans as well as some gorillas and chimps. While the iconic "and me" model above is a little too cutesy to be perfectly realistic, some of her work is so realistic that it would fool me (if not for the handy watermark). Here are some more shots of this doll:

And some of the other apes she has done:

I'm not the first person to post this-- while searching for more pictures I found this tumblr post which seems to have been the big reveal for most people that these are dolls. However, I thought I would tackle 2 follow up questions:

Are these dolls ethical?

Well, yeah. Some might ask if these dolls encourage the idea that this is an acceptable way to treat primates, but personally I think that the very small community of primate doll enthusiasts is a non-issue especially when you consider the impact of social media accounts that promote actual primates being kept as pets and treated like babies. Frankly if you want to snuggle a baby ape this would be the only way to do it (short of working as a surrogate caretaker for orphaned wildlife) without seriously contravening the endangered species act. Still, being vigilant against primate exploitation content is important, so:

How can you tell the difference between super realistic dolls and real primates?

In this case it was as easy as following the watermark. Googling Silver Tree Nursery brings up the Facebook page of the artist who makes the dolls. In general, sourcing is everything. If you know where an image comes from you can determine what the larger context is and whether what is happening is good. Here's an example:

Is this a reborn doll or a real baby? The framing makes it look very similar to the Silver Tree dolls with the stuffed animal and baby blanket, but if you were to reverse Google image search the picture you would find out that this is Yakini, a gorilla from the Werribee Zoo when he was a baby in 1999. Reverse searching is your friend, and it only takes a minute.