#like i start off like oh i kNOW frank didn't draw this because it's so POLISHED look at this

[frankmillerturnonyourlocation]

related to last post: finally reading all star. my vendetta against frank miller has been reignited.

[elliesflower]

loser!!!!!bff!!!!ellie!!!!!!!! hc's

i’m just jumping on the loser!ellie train bc i actually love it and i feel like she’s such a loser despite her commitment issues like…she wants to believe in love so bad, SO BAD that she is actually a hopeless romantic deep down she literally can’t help it but it’s trapped under her awkward funny girl exterior. she's so me fr 😵‍💫

all these are sfw except for a lil sum special for you FREAKS at the end teehee so as with all my content, please 18+ only, mdni!!!

cw; afab!reader, smut (at the end)

♡ all her doodles of cat and dina hello??? she’d have a whole fucking journal dedicated to just drawings of you, every time you hang out she’d be discreetly letting her eyes linger on your face so that she can sketch you out later. and she’d smile while sketching you i know she would, her cheeks would get all red and maybe she’d even giggle she wants you so bad!!! 

♡ she’d be on patrol and see a beautiful yellow flower and immediately think of you, she has to pick it for her best friend, she HAS to!! she’d lose her balance on her damn horse trying to protect it from getting damaged while she rode back into town, but it’s worth it to see the smile on your pretty face 

♡ i feel like she'd follow you around. in any context. patrol? she's slightly behind your horse to keep an eye on you. walking around jackson? she's literally always right behind your left shoulder, letting you lead the way. party at dina's? she's practically glued to you the whole night, and when the liquor would hit she was a little handsy, pathetically looping a finger through your belt loop as she followed you to the bathroom, moving your hair out of your face when you'd talk to her, etc.. and of course the next day she'd get so sick when she recalled her behavior, feeling shameful and wondering if you were catching on (ofc you were).

♡ and she’d dream about you all the time oh my gosh! esp after hanging out with you all day she wouldn’t be able to get you out of her head when she gets home. maybe she’ll definitely even write your name with a little heart next to it in her journal when she’s recalling the day. her subconscious would manifest the way that you looked trying to play her guitar into her dreams that night

♡ speaking of guitar, she’d 10000% write songs for you. she wouldn’t tell you they’re for you, of course, she’d just play the most beautiful love song you’ve ever heard and play it off like it was nothing. but when she gets home she’d probably cry because she was too scared to make a move on you :( 

♡ i also mentioned this in a previous post but this bitch would love frank ocean, so i can see her falling asleep listening to thinkin bout you and crying bout you :( or imagine in a modern world her sketching in her journal while listening to ivy before she starts to cry because she's so frustrated by her own awkwardness, and the fact she can't ever seem to tell you how she feels :((((

♡ if you ever got into another relationship would be beating herself up over it, like why didn't she make a move sooner? and she wouldn't be able to help herself, she'd get extra moody whenever your partner was around, distant and clearly irritated. poor baby is just so bad at expressing her feelings that whenever you'd ask her about it she'd just throw it under the rug and say she's on her period or something

♡ but when you and your partner inevitably broke up, of course she was right there to be your shoulder to cry on. you'd show up at her house sobbing in the middle of the night, and i think it would take her aback, honestly, how she felt her own tears falling as she embraced you on her doorstep. she would be so emotionally connected to you, your tears were hers, and she wanted nothing more than to make you feel better. she'd throw out an empty threat to your ex, and it'd make you smile. she loves to see you smile, gosh she'd do anything to make you happy, she just loves you so much!

♡ she wouldn't. stop. with the fucking. dad jokes. she'd be insatiable, truly, like...you were starting to wonder if she was getting off on telling them to you or something. but really, she just wanted to make you feel better, any little thing she could do to make you laugh would make her feel like she did good enough for the day

♡ and you'd start to see her romantically after a while, how could you not? and why didn't you sooner? she'd be so easily flustered though, every time your hand would linger on her shoulder, or whenever you'd squeeze her even tighter as you watched a horror movie...her heart would start beating all fast and her cheeks would get so rosy. maybe her pussy would even throb when she noticed you bending over extra slowly while getting dressed one day. and of course you were doing it for her

♡ she wouldn't be able to contain herself when you kiss her for the first time. and of course you made the first move, you think a loser like ellie would ever kiss you first? she'd been so desperate for you for so long i really think she might whine into your mouth. she's a whimperer, really, she'd probably gasp when you shove your hand down the front of her pants and get your fingers moving over her clit,

"oh! oh m'god," she'd be pathetic, her jaw clenching as she whined into your shoulder while your fingers slid between her wet folds with ease. she'd cum so fucking fast you'd barely have time to blink, repeating your name over and over like a prayer as she made a mess of your hand. you've never seen her like this, lust clouding her inhibition and making her so desperate it was like she was brainless, grabbing your wrist and bringing your slick-covered fingers to her mouth to suck them clean.

"i gotta taste you," she'd whine, and she'd make sure you were comfortable on the bed before spreading your legs and eating you out like she was a woman possessed, literally drunk on the taste of your pussy.

"taste so fucking good," between kitten licks to your clit, did she even know what she was saying? "i love you, i fucking love you," of course she was confessing her love for you now, when she had her nose buried in your cunt, intoxicated by the sound of your moans and the feeling of your skin being indented by her fingertips.

she may be a loser, but she'd be your loser.

[kay-then-i-guess]

So, I had this idea as I'm getting close to finishing the Election arc of my Roleshuffle AU to go through my previous comic pages and point out everything I did wrong :) This is all for funsies, and I feel like my art has gotten a lot better with the Election arc. Plus, I think it's very important to go back and critique yourself to 1: see how far you've come and 2: to better understand where you tend to make mistakes. So, let's get critiquing!

Soooo starting off, I really didn't know how to make a comic. I had only done very brief, minor comic making before, so this was a completely new field of art that I wasn't used to. You can immediately see that problem in the first and second panel, since they. They aren't a panel. Nothing about them (minus the speech bubbles) indicates that this is a comic. I think the first would have benefited from each item being properly separated, and the other would have benefited from an actual image behind it; not a gradient. Speaking of the items, that's supposed to be Sam's hand at the top, and it is freckle-less (no clue why I forgot to add those lol). Some other consistency things that are weird is that L'manberg has no tower entrance, and there aren't any trees surrounding it in any other drawing. On notes of consistency, the sword there is supposed to be Techno's, but the design changed later to have a gold hilt. I guess that change never reached this panel, so now that just looks like a random sword stuck in the ground. Nobody's sword in the comic looks like that haha. Similar deal with Techno's crown: the spacing of jewels is not consistent with how I draw it in the rest of the comic.

Moving on! The next two panels of Connor aren't bad, per se, they just aren't good. (I'm mainly bothered by the fact that he doesn't have teeth in the first one.) Also, because I didn't want to draw hands and cut his arms off, it just looks like the framing of the panel is all wrong. Plus, I don't think I've seen anyone pose like that in real life. He looks like he's about to hug you, which is not the vibe I was going for. In both of these panels, we have what will become a reoccurring problem throughout: loooooong neck because I didn't draw a base figure before drawing the clothes. Connor's face should either be longer in these panels, or his shoulders should be higher. Either way, the neck does not look right. Another reoccurring problem you'll see is dull coloring/shading. I'm still working on this, to be frank, but these images all look rather dull. There's nothing unique about the lighting/colors, so it doesn't really pop like it should. Either I needed to add more dynamic lighting or be better at highlights.

Yet another case of long neck. Oh, and weird positioning on the facial features. The eyes feel stretched across his face instead of, well, where they should be. I also think in these opening panels I really fail to encapsulate Connor's personality. I was really banking on the fact that he's a silly little comic relief character in the canon dsmp, but his delivery is very dry/flat whenever I watch old clips of him. Therefore, in the early bits, he just seems a bit off because of the high energy I gave him. Next up we have a bad case of something that looked good in the sketch but did not come across after coloring. What I wanted to happen was his face to gain some anime-type shading that screams "oh no", but it just wasn't strong enough, so the end result just seems like I copied and pasted the same panel for no reason. Also, in the lower image, Connor's face does not look right. I can't really put my finger on why, but it's either because his eyes are uneven or that the facial features, once again, kind of stretch across the face.

aaaaand I originally wanted to go through the whole first part of my comic, but this is turning out to be very long. So that's a tomorrow project. Hope you enjoyed my critique!

[mysticmellowlove]

I just thought about this I don’t know how I didn’t before. Yan making us feel insecure, of course not on purpose but just by existing. Like, he’s just good at everything, it makes us feel like shit honestly. We like swimming and he’s able to do triple flips on diving boards. We want to try something new and he’s like mastered it. Drawing and painting? Oh he is fucking Picasso. Singing? I thought Frank Sinatra died asshole. Baking? He’s never even touched a cake pan and can make a wedding cake when we’ve lived for baking and had to get it through trial and error. Maybe he grew up with more opportunities and money than us so when we finally get money to start doing things we love we just feel outcasted because he just seems in a different world than us.

also sent by this anon!

Oh also this is the anon that sent in the feeling insecure by yan. I also wanted to add, he thinks he is impressing us like: “She will like me more if I’m more impressive” but it actually makes us feel useless compared to him and basically pushes us away because we think he could do better. Better with another who had the privilege to grow up with money to have years of experience. That’s all ❤️

warnings; self loathing, soft hours, yan male (but not really he just soft for you), gn reader

Sitting against his chest felt off today. Not because you were unhappy with him but because you just felt so out of place. His apartment was lovely, clean and manicured with all these wonderful sculptures. You know he had done them himself, he had told you as much when he saw your old sketchbook one day.

It was getting exhausting, to feel like you had to always compete with your own boyfriend. You loved him, you really did but you couldn't help it. You just wanted to be something in his eyes. A good painter, a good cook or baker, a writer, a gardener... smart... and yet he seemed to outplay you at every corner.

You knew he didn't mean it, he just wanted to show off and portray himself as someone who could look after you. Have fun with you, relate to you... but it didn't feel like that. Were you even really good at your hobbies to begin with?

His fingers threaded through your hair as he stroked over your scalp calmingly, his eyes fixed on the sports show on the TV. It had been another day of trying to show that you could stand on your own. Another day of him completely overshadowing you. The smell of baked bread, currently in the oven, didn't make anything better. You had found a recipe online and wanted to try it out but he had to get involved. He had basically taken over the whole process, essentially telling you to sit pretty.

You cleared your throat, you had to say something. Part of a relationship was all about communication, and you truly enjoyed spending time with him. It's just that things have gotten too much lately.

"Hey... can we talk?" There was a better way to say it but that's what came out, another fault of yours. He stilled his motion, his hand freezing in your hair as he helped you sit up off him. As soon as you got comfortable sitting next to him you looked over. As expected his face was stricken, eyes wide with alertness and his body taut.

"Of course, what's wrong baby?" You could hear the wobble in his voice as he looked at you. His attention and devotion weren't anything you could question, that was how much he loved you after all.

"Oh, it's not anything bad I just..." Your voice quieted as you looked at him, the sensation of admitting your feelings was overwhelming, to say the least. Still, he was patient, sitting and waiting.

"I just, feel as if you're trying to make me feel as if I can't do anything." Once again, not the best way to word things but to talk about your feelings you had to actually say them out loud. His eyes widened but before he could say anything you interrupted.

"Like, I just feel like every time I do something you're better than I am... and I just...why?" You felt yourself getting choked up the more you thought about it.

"Why not be with someone who's as great as you are?" It was like the world had stopped spinning. He looked at you stricken with regret and sadness. Gently he picked up your hands and held them in his grasp tightly.

"Baby, I would never... I'm so sorry." He knelt forward, his head going to rest on your chest.

"That's not what I intended, I was just trying to... I was trying to look good in front of you. I just wanted you to think I was worth your time." He said as he looked into your eyes, the eyes you knew to be happy and shining were now downtrodden.

"I just feel like you need to be with a man that can truly take care of you, someone that's the best for you... I'm sorry that I made you feel this way though." He admitted, his head shaking as he cuddled into you.

"You know I'd do anything to make you feel better, I promise..." He looked up suddenly determined.

"I promise that I'll think before I act." He said, his head nodding adamantly. You couldn't help the small smile that crossed your face, always so eager to please. You knew he wasn't doing it on purpose and now that you had communicated it to him... things would start to look up.

[angelynmoon]

Eddie starts writing Buck letters after Frank suggests it in Therapy, it makes some things easier, but harder too.

-

Dear Evan, (Eddie isn't sure why he chooses to write Evan rather than Buck, not yet, but it fits better, reminds him that this is important, that it needs to catch Buck's attention.)

I know you'll never read this, because I'm never going to send it. I need to apologise, maybe someday I'll do it out loud, but I'm sorry, I'm sorry I said you were exhausting, you're not, youxre fun and I know you'll be there, you're a safe place, not just for Chris, but for me too.

It made it easy to say that, because I knew you wouldn't stay mad, and I'm so sorry, you're not the one that's exhausting, I am, I know I amn I don't know how you and Chris put up with me but I'm so very thankful you do.

I don't know what I'd do without you, Buck, so thank you for having my back.

(Eddie doesn't sign the letters, not a single one of them, Buck knows his handwriting well enough, and since Eddie will never send the letters it doesn't matter. The letters go in a shoebox, like the one he keeps Shannon's letters in, like the one he keeps the pictures of Chris and the 118s celebrations in but this one is just for Buck, it's where Eddie tucked his happy little heart drawing to keep it safe.

Eddie doesn't think anything of it as the box fills up with more and more letters, each one baring his heart and soul more openly with each one. It helps, itxs everything he knows he can never say, can never change and it gets easier with each sealed envelope to keep from ruining what he and Buck have.

Admitting he loved her had ruined his friendship with Shannon, his father always told him thag men don't say that to each other the one time he said it to him and so Eddie hasn't said those words to either of his parents in years, but he tells Chrisn he can't help it because he needs Chris to know, needs him to know that Eddie will always love him, even when his kid doesn't love him.

Eddie doesn't blame Chris for that, Eddie doesn't much like himself most days either.

On those days Eddie writes to Buck.)

Dear Evan,

I'm glad you felt safe enough to tell me about Tommy, that you knew I'd support you. It really doesn't change anything for us, but, dear God, I wish it did, I wish I could tell you, wish it was that simple to say, that I felt safe enough to tell you.

That's not your fault, though, don't even think it is, it's me, me and my stupid brain telling me that I can't ruin the best thing I ever had by telling him I love him and have for a while.

(And oh, that felt good, felt like a weight lifting off his shoulders. Eddie stared down at the words he'd written and smiled, just a little.)

I love you, Evan Buckley. (It still felt good, felt right, felt like the world wouldn't implode because he'd chance the words.)

I love you, Evan, I think I have since I realized you went under a firetruck to drag me to safety.

You asked me what I remembered about getting shot and I... I lied to you, Buckn I lied because I remember everything about that moment.

I remember seeing the blood splatter on your face and thinking that they could take my life as long as they spared yours, not just for Chris' sake but for mine too. I couldn't bare to watch you die, that three minutes and seventeen seconds felt like the longest moments of my life, it felt like I couldn't breathe, like a panic atteck but ten times worse and I knew that was what the rest of my life would feel like if you never woke up.

Is that love? If it is I don't understand why so many people want it. How can they go searching for something and give someone else the power to destroy them so thoroughly.

I didn't feel like that with Shannon, I loved her, yes, but I don't think it was the right kind of love, not the one she wanted, that she needed in order to stay, not the way I love you.

It's why I won't ever tell you, you wouldn't want to hurt me, not like that but saying something would change everything, it did with Shannon and I couldn't bare the thought of us changing.

You're happy, you're in love, Tommy's... he makes you happy, that's enough, that's what matters.

It's okay, Buck, I love you and it's okay you don't love me too.

(Eddie seals the letter, pens the date and slots it in it's place in the box, it's getting full, he might need to get a bigger box, but that's a problem for future Eddie, present Eddie has to get ready for work and prepare himself for Buck to gush about whatever date Tommy took him on over the weekend.

It should feel wrong, Eddie should feel jealous about Buck and Tommy because he was in love with Buck himself, but he didn't feel it, hadn't really felt much of anything since his parents took Chris back to Texas.

Chris hadn't called, Eddie understood, at least Chris was calling Buck, that was good, at least Eddie knew his son was okay, Buck had given his parents a list of stuff to follow for Chris, and they were adhearing to it according to the updates Abuela was giving him.

His parents hadn't called to check in with him either, Eddie tried not to let that sting too.

Eddie sighed, he was so tired, the house was so quiet that he couldn't sleep, he kept waking up and running to Chris' room, several times he'd had to stop himself halfway through dialing 9-1-1 to report his son missing.

He didn't know how to fix this, didn't know if it could be fixed and that hurt, it hurt almost as mucb as the fact that Chris had called his grandparents instead of talking to Eddie, instead of trusting him.

But Eddie had to try, he had to find a way to fix it.

But he was so tired of always being the one to fix things, why couldn't someone else fix it?

Why did it have to be him, because it seemed that no matter how much he tried he only seemed to make things worse.

Eddie shook his head and got up, he had to get to work, he couldn't be late, not when Buck would be so excited to tell him about his date, it was good that Buck was so happy, maybe it could rub off a little on Eddie, at least until he got home to his empty house.)

Dear Evan,

If you're reading this, then I'm sorry, I'm sorry that I won't be able to watch your back anymore.

I know you'll take care of Chris, I never once doubted that over the years, you love him like he's yours and he has been, for longer than either of us realized.

I..., I miss him, I miss you, I know neither of you are gone, but it feels like it, you both feel so very far away from men and you only seem to get further the more I hold on.

I'm sorry for being so needy, well it feels like I'm being needy.

I love you, Evan, and this isn't a goodbye, it's a see you later, much, much later.

It's a just in case letter, I write a new one every now and again, because tomorrow is never promised, not for you, not for me.

There's one for Chris too, and a couple for each milestone I might miss, I know you'll give them to him, they're in his memory box.

I hope, I hope you find happiness, that you find someone you can trust your whole heart to.

I'm sorry I was never brave enough to trust you with mine.

You love so easily, Evan, and you are so easy to love.

Falling in love with you, even when it hurt so much to realize it, was the best thing I have ever done after raising Chris.

It was so easy.

Thank you for letting me love you, even if I was never brave enough to tell you.

I'm sorry, I love you.

Thank you, Evan Buckley, for being so easy to love.

Goodbye.

-

A/n: did I kill Eddie? I don't know, Is Buck reading these letters after Eddie dies? Don't know that either. Am I going to add on to this? We'll see.

I'm sorry for the sad hours but this demanded to be written.

I need feedback, I started chapter 2 from Buck's pov but I'm trying to figure out whether this progresses to Tommy/Bucky/Eddie or if Tommy always knew there was an expiration date on his relationship with Buck, either way I'm going to try not to have character bashing... except Gerrard.

[m00ngbin]

hey......... itd be a real shame if you started ranting about the demolition lovers and the stories and lore behind the mcr albums.........................

OH MY GOD YES IT WOULD BE. SUCH A SHAME.

Ok so everyone already knows that mcr like originally started in September of 2001 because Gerard Way and his brother Mikey Way were living in New Jersey when the twin towers fell and Gerard saw it happen because allegedly he was meeting with Cartoon Network executives about a cartoon idea he had and he was like "this was super traumatizing I'm going to start a band where I can vent everything out through songs." (Great idea)

So he starts the band with his brother, (bass), Ray Toro, (main guitarist and backup vocalist), and Matt Pelisser, (drummer), (mainly Matt Pelisser), and in 2002 they release their first album, (MY FAVORITE), I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love. (Eventually Frank Iero, (backup vocalist and rhythm guitarist), joins the band but he wasn't there when they formed. He WAS featured on two songs in Bullets though, Honey, This Mirror Isn't Big Enough For Both Of Us and Early Sunsets Over Monroeville).

The first song they ever wrote, Skylines and Turnstiles, is about Gerard's feelings about 9/11. It's technically the seventh track on the album but yk. STILL THE FIRST.

Most of Bullets is ab the band members' lives growing up and their experiences watching 9/11 but it's also where they start coming up with the storyline for the Demolition Lovers. ANRJSHEKRJ I LOVE THE DEMOLITION LOVERS

Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge/Demolition Lovers

Ok so the Demolition Lovers storyline is a little confusing and mostly up for interpretation. MY interpretation is that in the song Demolition Lovers, (from the Bullets album), the Lovers are running away from unknown people in the middle of a desert, where they're both shot.

The Demolition Man dies and goes to hell, while the Demolition woman ends up in a coma. (I THINK SHES IN A COMA BC OF THE DRAWING IN THE LINER ART FOR REVENGE WHERE SHES IN THE HOSPITAL).

Then the Revenge album picks up where Bullets left off and we learn that the Demolition Man is told by the devil that if he goes back to earth and kills 1000 evil men he'll be allowed to see the Demolition Woman again.

Of course the Demolition Man is so desperate to see the Demolition Woman again that he says yes, so he goes back to Earth and Give 'Em Hell, Kid starts the story.

He starts in New Orleans and takes a train to an unspecified other place to begin the task. He's really remorseful about it, but he gets super drugged up to stay awake while he finds these 1000 evil men. Atp the Demolition Woman starts feeling kind of abandoned bc I guess she never realized that he had died and she has no clue what he's doing.

The next song, I'm Not Okay, is supposed to touch on how the Demolition Lovers' relationship was kind of toxic and ALLEGEDLY this was originally supposed to be the last song on the album, where it ends with the Demo Man's suicide. Obviously we knew that the Demo Lovers didn't have the most stable relationship but this song was supposed to highlight how bad it was

In the song Ghost Of You, the Demo Man starts reflecting on his actions and how much he misses the Demo Woman. At this point he's worrying that either he won't be able to kill enough people or he'll just never be able to see her again.

Jetset starts with the Demo Man finally getting out of jail and finding a new partner for his killing spree. She wants the relationship to be more, but the Demo Man is still hung up on the Demo Woman. (Obviously, if he wasn't he wouldn't be doing all of this.) Both the Demo Man and the partner are addicted to drugs at this point, the Demo Man mainly so that he can stay awake and cope with what he's doing.

In Hang 'Em High he starts doubting that he can go through with killing all of these people and starts thinking that if he fails, the Demo Woman should go on without him. In Fashion Statement/Deathwish, he regains his confidence and gets much closer to his goal. He realizes though, that even if he does succeed death will eventually bring the Lovers apart again.

In between Fashion Statement/Deathwish and Cemetery Drive the Demolition Woman gets out of the hospital and kills herself. (Helena doesn't technically fit with most of the story but I like to think that it's the Demo Man going to her funeral).

In Cemetery Drive the Demolition Man visits her grave and finally gets to 999 evil men. It's at this point that he realizes that he's been tricked by the devil. He'd killed 999 evil men, but since the devil made him a murderer, he was the 1000th.

In For A Living the Demo Man accepts that he'll never be able to see the Demo Woman again and kills himself. He finally reaches 1000 evil souls and so he actually IS able to reunite with the Demolition Woman in hell.

ARKAHSGFJS. I LOVE THE DEMOLITION LOVERS STORY SO MUCH YOU DONT UNDERSTAND I LOSE MY MIND THINKING ABOUT THEM EVERY DAY. Also like. Disclaimer you don't want a relation like the Demolition Lovers had. I didn't get super into it but their shit was FUCKED UP. Every time I see someone say that they wish they and their bf are just like the demo lovers I have a "hm." moment bc like. Did you even listen to ANY of the songs mentioning them?? Did you read ab their lore?? Do you know ANYTHING about them???

I'm not a gatekeeper or anything I swear I just don't think people should be saying that they want a relationship just like that

OH I TOTALLY FORGOT, during the Bullets tour era Gerard had a faux leather jacket that he wore so often and didn't wash that it literally disintegrated because of his sweat. I think most people know that but what they don't know is that there were TWO leather jackets that he disintegrated. One of them completely fell apart and the other one just lost one of the arms

THE BLACK PARADE

Ok listen I love the back parade but I'm not going to say AS much about it bc I spent most of my time hyperfixated on the Demo Lovers story and Danger Days so I don't know everything. (REMEMBER EVERYTHING I SAY IS AN INTERPRETATION DONT YELL AT ME IF YOU THINK SOMETHING ELSE)

Ok so the album starts with The End, where we learn about The Patient. He's dying and he probably won't be missed, and we get a reflection of his life and his fear of dying.

In Dead!, we learn about The Patient's diagnosis and prognosis. He has cancer and he doesn't have very long to live, maybe two weeks at the MOST. The first verse of the song, ("Did you get what you deserve? The ending of your life," (not said by him)), suggests that maybe The Patient is kind of a piece of shit and he deserves to die. The Patient is deep in denial atp, he's refusing to acknowledge that he's dying but he also wants it to be over.

This Is How I Disappear has The Patient reach out to a past lover, letting them know that they'll be the only one to remember him, and he begs them to keep his memory alive. It's mentioned again that this guy has done horrible things, but we still don't know what yet.

In The Sharpest Lives, we see The Patient start trying to distract himself from his imminent death by partying and drinking. He wrecks what's left of his life and it ends up dragging other people down with him.

After this song, he sobers up and goes to the hospital, where the rest of the album takes place

WTTBP is where he starts reflecting on his life again and accepts that his life is about to be over. Death comes, but in the form of his favorite memory: a parade The Patient's dad had taken him to when he was younger. The Patient's dad had told him that he wanted him to grow up to be a good person, (whoops), and that he can't be by The Patient's side forever.

I Don't Love You has The Patient desperately trying to break off his relationship with his current partner. He knows that his death will be painful for both of them and he doesn't want his partner to have to watch him rot away. (He's being selfless?? Shocker)

In House Of Wolves we get a description of how he sees hell, where he knows he'll end up. Despite everything he doesn't want to burn for eternity. He knows he's a bad person, but he spends the song INSISTING that a lot of people aren't better than him. (Dude🧍)

In Cancer, now that his treatment has started, he feels ashamed of how the chemo is making him look. His hair is falling out, his lips are chapped and faded, he's pale and gaunt, etc etc. He looks like shit pretty much. He already feels dead. He starts thinking selflessly again, trying to say goodbye to his loved ones in a short heartfelt way so that it doesn't have to be long and drawn out and painful. He doesn't want to leave them behind but yk. Life's not fair and he knows it.

Mama FINALLY gives us what he did, and guess what it is. War crimes. He was involved in a war where he committed terrible acts. Things so bad that even his own mother rejects and disowns him. At the point he's at in Mama, he decides to write her a letter where he admits that he's a terrible man and a terrible son, and since he's dying he would like it if they could reconcile and talk.

In Sleep The Patient says that he doesn't regret what he's done, but he wants to leave it all behind and end his life on a high note.

Teenagers is a song that doesn't really fit with the rest of the album, and I'm pretty sure Gerard Way says that it's not the most relevant to the story. There's a couple lines about how The Patient was an outcast in highschool, but most of the song is ab the system trying to control kids and get them to conform.

In Disenchanted, his life starts flashing before his eyes and he reviews it like a movie. He gets really disappointed about his life and how it's ending. He talks about how he could have changed things and that honestly his life was pretty worthless bc he just waited for death.

In Famous Last Words, The Patient is supposedly talking to a loved one, but he's not sure if he's dreaming it bc he doesn't know if he's dead or alive atp. Either way he has accepted that he's dead or about to be and he's at peace with it. (Or as at peace with dying of cancer as you can be)

NOW HERES WHERE IT GETS SUPER INTERESTING. THERES A SPLIT ENDING. Blood is the one that Gerard Way considers the ACTUAL ending, but they also wrote Heaven Help Us as an alternative ending that's technically just as correct as Blood

In Blood, The Patient chooses to stay alive, even though he knows that there's no way he's going to get better. The doctors and nurses that are taking care of him pity him and are only keeping him around for the money.

In Heaven Help Us, he DOES end up dying. Atp he's waiting in purgatory for the verdict on whether he's going to heaven or hell (it's going to be hell)

YAYY BLACK PARADE DONE

Danger Days

AKDOFHADORN OK SO THE STORY LINE FOR DANGER DAYS IS KIND OF CONFUSING BC THERES THREE: THE ONE FOR THE ALBUM, THE ONE FOR THE MUSIC VIDEOS, AND THE ONE FOR THE COMICS

DID YOU KNOW THAT GERARD WAY IS A COMIC BOOK ARTIST AND AUTHOR TOO?? HE WROTE A COMIC BOOK FOR DANGER DAYS AND HE MADE UMBRELLA ACADEMY AND PENI PARKER IN THE SPIDERVERSE MOVIES

So in the album, the first half basically talks about fighting in the desert and recalling the events of the Helium wars (The Only Hope For Me is You). Pretty upbeat.

Then in the middle of the album (Traffic Report) Jet Star and Kobra Kid are apparently killed, leaving Party Poison and Fun Ghoul alive?

The second half of the album deals with more serious themes of sacrifice, the "message", desperation, and, (obviously), sticking it to the man. Vampire Money is the only track set in the "real world," which gets proven by the use of their real names in the opening.

The EP, The Mad Gear and Missle Kid, contains three songs by this fictional band that the Killjoys would have listened to while driving around. The three songs on it are: 1. sex with porno-droids, 2. hooking up with older men in punk clubs, and 3. makes a reference to drinking juice while killing, which is what Val Velocity says in the comic. She might have been copying Party Poison but idk.

In the music videos, (Na Na Na and Sing), the Fabulous Killjoys run around the desert with The Girl, killing dracs. Korse eventually catches up to them and there is a shootout where the Killjoys get stunned and The Girl gets kidnapped.

Then the Killjoys go on a suicide mission into Battery City to try and get her back. They find The Girl who has been held by The Director and fight to escape. During the fight, Party Poison realizes that there are actually people under the drac masks, (one is implied to be Cherri Cola, who was played by Jimmy Urine (ew)), and he freaks the fuck out.

Korse kills him first, and the other three are also killed while trying to escape. The Girl is rescued, (by DJ Hot Chimp? I think?), and goes back out to the desert.

The Killjoys are wrapped up in body bags, but there was supposed to be another music video after Sing (which was cut due to budget issues), and Gerard mentioned in an interview once that he thought the Killjoys never really die because they would sort of spontaneously regenerate like in a video game or something.

There are three parts to the comics. The first is about The Girl, and reveals that the reason the Killjoys protected her was that they believed she was like a messiah. The Killjoys are all long dead by now. This group of teenagers, the Ultra V's, has decided to model themselves after the Killjoys, and the story talks about The Girl's interactions with them and coming to terms with her destiny. It's a coming of age type thing.

The second part talks about two android prostitutes from Battery City, and how they escape.

The third part has Korse as the main character, and reveals that he is gay and he has to hide this from Battery City officials. It's mainly ab him trying to get freedom and escape as well.

The Foundations Of Decay

NEWEST MCR SONG OMFG. It came out in 2022 following MCR's 6-7 year hiatus and URGAHDHFJS ITS SO GOOD. From just the lyrics

"He was there the day the towers fell

And so he wandered down the road

And we would all build towers of our own

Only to watch the roots corrode"

I think at least that part is about Gerard and a callback to why he started the band in the first place.

The whole song is kind of about the band and their history and everything and URGAJHDHFISSH I love this song so much you don't understand. It's very reminiscent of the Bullets era but it's a lot more mature I think.

NOW FOR MY FAVORITE SONG EVER OF ALL TIME: OUR LADY OF SORROWS

Our Lady Of Sorrows is on the Bullets album and it's the best song from any era imo. It's about how far someone will go for their friends and it's a really aggressive way of basically saying that you would die for someone and that you would stand with them against anything.

The song was originally a demo called Bring Me More Knives, and it only had Gerard, Ray, and Matt playing on it. Allegedly Mikey loved the song so much that he managed to teach himself to play the bass decently enough in four days just to join the band and play it.

Some of the demos from (mainly) the Bullets era were called the Attic Demos because they were recorded in the Matt's attic

Matt got kicked out of MCR in 2004, (just after the Revenge album came out), because apparently he was caught stealing. He was replaced by Bob Bryar, and currently Jarrod Alexander is the drummer for MCR

Oh I feel like I should mention that nothing was glamorous ab any of the tours or the band members while they were touring before the hiatus. These were like traumatized 20 something year olds touring the country and doing drugs and becoming alcoholics and it pisses me off so badly when people try to make that era seem so great. There was an entire chunk of the Life On The Murder Scene documentary about Gerard Way struggling with alcoholism and how his hygiene was so bad bc he couldn't take care of himself. That's part of what that jacket disintegrated. Ofc it was also bc touring is disgusting and you don't get a lot of chances to shower and stuff but nothing ab any of that is glamorous

Oh but they're all a lot better now I think. Obviously I don't KNOW bc idk any of the band members but from what I've seen they all at least look better

[tiglo]

Deathloop Slab only: Day 2 (technically 3)

So uh, I didn't write down what I did in game yesterday, and I was high as fuck so I hardly remember what I did either, so you'll just get the cliff notes

-I got the Flicker upgrade for Aether

-I got every base slab that I didn't already have

-I all but finished Space invader

-I finished Devouring of the Lambs and Lost in Transmission

-I got the unique sniper

Day 3

I wanted to finish Radio Silence as soon as possible today mainly for plot reasons but also because I wanted the purple quality PT spiker that tags enemies, the last of the horizon stations I need to do is the one in Karl's bay so I have to spend the morning in The Complex (I didn't try the wake up challenge again).

This trip to the complex was very eventful but I don't have the patience to give you a minute by minute transcript so basically I'd fuck up and fail stealth, successfully sneak away, then fuck up again for like 20 minutes. Anyway I only sent power to Karl's Bay since I don't think it does anything but unlock the Horizon doors.

I wanted to go to Karl's bay next but you can't go at noon for some reason, so instead I went to Fristad Rock to kill Fia again, she spotted me when I opened the door to her... round room thing. Which really showed me how useful that gun is going to be in this challenge. And I got Withdrawal which gives me power every time I get a kill while Havoc is active, it can basically make me immortal for an indefinite amount of time.

But in the afternoon I actually have three things to do Karl's Bay, first I collect the Earworm upgrade for Fugue which isn't really that good, then I find frank's fireworks to properly start The Ballad of Ramblin' Frank. Finally I go to the Horizon station and have a conversation with a past, present or future version of myself (the lore is weird, I might do a video/long tumblr post about it). I also collect the password and the tagging nail gun

I spend the Evening in Updaam, first going to the RAK and learning I need to kill every visionary but Julianna in order to get to Julianna to kill her by having another conversation with another version of myself (again, the lore and story is weird), finally completing Radio Silence. I then go to Otto's workshop to find it burned down, oh no if only I could have done something to prevent this tragedy from happening. Then I finally go to Aleksis' party to kill him again. tip for finding Aleksis: he is the only person at the party with two exemplar Limp 10s which are easily noticeable since they're orange. I turn off the chocolate tap to draw him into the cellar where I murder him and collect Zone which is a decent upgrade for Karnesis. Julianna invaded somehow even though I turned off invasions.

The next morning I go to Updaam again because I remembered that this game is about a time loop so I could just stop the fire before it happens, so I do that and comeback to Updaam again at noon to get the password for Franks fireworks and I collet Reach from Charlie by crashing his Among Us larp party. I go Karl's Bay, thankfully collect Discord from the collector and stealth kill him for the first time in my time playing this game, and sabotage Frank's fireworks to finish The Ballad of Ramblin' Frank. I go to The Complex in the evening and collect Ghost which is good for normal stealth gameplay but because of my current playstyle it isn't all that good. this was probably the shortest day I've played in deathloop, that might just be because I actually planned the whole loop that time

Thought's on Flicker:

I never used Flicker much in regular gameplay but it is actually very useful since it's like havoc but no one knows where you are, so outside of one situation it's better in general.

[cryptid-killjoy]

Delta loved when Frank expressed himself in ways like this, drawing in her blood. She didn't always realize it if it was on her back. Sometimes she'd see it later. Extra surprise gifts for later. How could she not love this man? So psycho for her and so damn cute. It was a winning combo.

After recomposing and letting Frank fix her shirt and wings she was too amused. Frank looked so handsome to her tonight. His grin over getting one over on Arthur even after death felt fitting somehow. She couldn't decide if it was a trick or a treat. It was probably both because it was great. She wasn't mad. For a moment she thought she should be, but she just wasn't. Maybe she liked showing off Frank won again just for old time sake. Maybe she liked when Frank teased Arthur for whatever reason. Maybe she just didn't give a fuck because she had too much real heavy shit in her mind to care about such a silly thing. Or maybe she just found it really damn funny Lil John was the one wearing her number one fan gear when Arthur seemed to be her little stalker.

Either way, she'd reply, "Yes, let's. Our guests are waiting."

Arthur would panic as expected by the couple who were both no doubt inwardly sniggering inside their heads as they walked closer to him. Every step was a doomsday closing in. Did Arthur know Frank had mind powers of some type? Sure. Did he know if it worked on ghosts? He was going to assume it did unstill he knew it otherwise. He tried so hard to clear his mind while he was trying to get his boner to settle and act natural all at once. The stairwell was too long to go rushing down for his prosthetic leg in time to look any sort of normal. But he couldn't think it through. He started to hop down steps in his haste and soon came to the realization as he heard the footsteps catching up behind him.

The more he tried to clear his head the more his thoughts raced the opposite effect happened. His head was filled with more thoughts than before. Everything he told himself not to think about came to the surface. He finally turned around and tried to stand in place on the stair and leaned like he was chilling there.

"Oh, hey guys! Fancy meeting you here of all places."

Delta stopped her feet. She watched as Arthur couldn't figure out where to comfortably fix his eyes upon either one of them. His nerves were on display. That made her grin all the more. The glace at Frank's pants and intenseness after on deliberately not looking there again, at least trying not to. He was having a hard time looking Delta in the eyes. So, of course she kept looking directly in his.

"Uh huh. Yeah, so weird finding us in our own home where we live."

She was cutting him any slack.

"Uhhhhhhhhh, right." He kept trying to keep his waistline turned slightly to the wall. He was hanging on a guard rail. "I was looking for you guys."

"So strange to find us in our own home where we live when you were looking for us."

"Heh. Yeah."

She kept right on his eyes making him all the more uncomfortable.

"Get on with it Arthur. Tell us what you were looking for us for." Still not once mentioning him standing around in the middle of a lengthy stairwell on one leg or questioning it.

"Oh uh right. Well, I'm only here for a night. I just really wanted to see you both. I've been waiting for this night." He started talking faster. "Remember when I used to get into comas, or anesthesia, or whatever and I'd manage to find you guys in death? Now I'm on the other side. It's trickier to find ways. Especially at your castle. Can't get in here."

"That's on purpose."

"Right." He stared for a second with a trying to read Delta wondering if he unwelcome or not and she gave no sign of him not counting when it came to her ghost protections. So the silence eventually was cut off by his own talking. He had to keep going.

"Well uh anyway. I keep trying to warn you and couldn't figure out how till today. I finally got in."

Delta rolled her fingers in a hurry this up motion.

"Right. Right. What I'm trying to say is there's disturbance in force."

Delta's brow went up.

"I mean there's people in Feral. Silas and the Evil Queen. She's in the swamps."

Delta's eyes narrowed. "Is that all? Just two?"

"You're mostly left with stray semi-immortal types in the depths like the pixies. But yeah, the queen's out at Skull Rock where your mother had her meetings. She was living out there with Silas. I thought you'd want to know about them."

She thought to herself, "We already have Silas." The Queen slipped under their nose.

Things Delta was realizing as he spoke. Arthur and possibly other Merry Men were still watching over Feral even after death. It was only now she was even realizing they were going by their Sherwood names in death when they were out there on the dance floor. She had to admit she hadn't thought a whole lot about the Merry Men since they left. Out of sight out mind maybe? But now that they were here it was giving her something to think about. Too much for now. She was trying to have a party. Maybe Arthur proved to be useful in the end too, not just for entertainment.

She stared at him after he gave the information, he'd been dying to give them all night. He had no idea they already had Silas locked up. Knowing the queen was out there was still helpful. She could tell he was looking for a thanks or a good job. Instead she changed the subject.

"Could have sworn I saw you earlier in the ball room with two legs."

"Me? Nah. What's a ghost need a leg for? Nah. Nah. Not me. Prosthetic ghost legs. Ha ha." He tried to play it off. His voice got higher pitched as the sentence went on.

He wasn't thinking this through. His leg was at the bottom of the winding stair. What then?

Delta looked up at Frank, "Oh, my bad. I must have miss seen."

Frank didn’t need to scour that pretty little brain to know how good Delta was feeling, her mumbles, her inability to say his name, her quivering mess of a body was loud enough. It was impossible not to feel cocky - heh heh - with his girl reacting like this. She might not have had anything else to compare it with but damn, he knew that she was enjoying this, same as he was.

His acid girl. She was melting him into her, even after they were finished, he was all over her, hands and fingers stroking the back, the wings, her upper thighs, feeling his sterile seed slipping out and pushing it back in so that they were one before they finally started to get dressed once more.

He spread the blood on her wings, before - in an almost overly cute motion - he drew a small heart on her skin with her own blood. “Art on art,” He admired his own little piece on her. She had made so many marks on him, so permanent - but he wouldn’t want to affect her perfect skin. Each scar, each freckle, each cut from the wings escaping - were exactly as it should be.

A smirk was across his face, his large eyes lingering on hers as he ‘lurched’ over her, forked tongue escaping his lips to lick at them as she bit on him so deliciously. “We both did,” He agreed. There was tension that he had needed to work off, as there always was when there was a lot of people in their space. He wouldn’t feel completely comfortable until things were as they were supposed to be. But this was a good amount of relief.

He ripped at her clothing carefully for her. Not with brute strength but with calculated rips, making it look as if it was intentional, and then the wings had all the space that they needed to come out, to spread the way that they should be. These beautiful goddamn wings, that he stroked and admired now, even while knowing there was an audience. A world of their own, acting like no one could see, no one could interrupt.

He’d been too in the zone to really tune into Arthur’s thoughts during his fuck session. He was inside of the most perfect girl alive, what kind of fool would he be if he spent that time figuring out what some bald-headed little voyeur was thinking? But now that the post-sexual haze was dissipating, he could tune on in.

And it was hilarious.

‘Not only dreaming. He’s one bit of friction away from cumming his pants,’ Frank replied to Delta, a smirk on his face as he looked in that direction as well. He could feel through Arthur that he hadn’t actually seen anything inappropriate on Delta, but oh, he caught that his dick had been sighted. Good. That just made it all the more funny.

He ran his fingers through Delta’s curls, adjusting them so they were less messy, and then bent low to kiss the top of her head. And then loud enough to let Arthur hear - “Shall we return to our guests?”

In the hopes that he would scramble around and try to get himself together. Shuffle down the stairs on his ass to try to get his other fake leg or something. There was some joy in the aardvark’s misery. But he couldn’t help letting out a chuckle, an outward expression of how much he was enjoying making the few hours that Arthur was here into something so … diabolical horny.

[the-firebird69]

We see that a lot of people are up to trying to build this lawn mower car and they have kids for Jeeps kits and their little bit big and that's what they say they're too wide seven inches is not what you see it's more like a foot and a half lighter and you're too big so they want to make them small and it's too hard I don't want to cut it in half and put it back together it's fiberglass and they're about 2 ft long er and that's too long so going back to the drawing board and found that old Jeeps real ones have a body that kind of fits but they don't want to use the lawn mower if they already have an old Jeep but the whole Jeep doesn't work and it won't work so they're taking the old Jeep body off it's about a foot wider and it's about a foot and a half longer and I have to lighten it up and they're going to put the 50 gear in and they're trying to move the controls around and they're going to try to put jacket on the engine in a couple other things they need they have to put a alternator in for lights and stuff and then they've got a car and a lot of people will want one but there's only so many jeep bodies and they're really are not many of those they're very rare and collectors items and even the kits are very rare. Frank Castle Hardcastle is selling a kit manual and it's online but he's going to go to the leaders and ask if they want the plans a lot of these stupid lawn mowers in California and Florida everywhere these dumb lawn mowers and the cars don't work and the car is sucked into repair but the Briggs & Stratton motor it's easy to fix and you can get new ones. So they're going to sit down with us and look at the plans and we want to sell the plans to them and we have a couple other ideas we have kid cars and we have the chassis if we sell them to chassis we want them to make the kit car and they'll turn around and make military but no that's not really going to help them and we want them to understand that if they make military they'll probably end up paying them regular colors painting them but getting them the chassis is another story we don't think we can get them out there but they can get them out there and we can sell them and put them on their ships oh that's a good idea we're going to sit down and meet with him tonight tell them to f off too while we're at it LOL and they need these vehicles and they have small four wheel drive trucks and they need the small four wheel drive trucks a lot of them and you just put a pickup truck kit then we have molds and we'll sell them the molds you really need like hundreds now you need thousands of bullets thousands of molds no we can sell the millions so it's going to be a big deal

Frank Castle Hardcastle

I'm going to get on this right now because they're loading up and we want this chassis to be used for something and we were talking to the max a little bit they say go ahead with it cuz we didn't know what you're saying you need someone to stop these clones or get in there a little they're proving it now and they're making suggestions

Duke Nukem Blockbuster

Helping us die but at least it won't be from seeing around farting and doing nothing and hurting our own people

Bja

Yup

I see it too get going on it get going on it I started doing it and everybody loves it

Brad I want those kids and I want them here now he says there won't be a kid we're going to get you the molds cuz we can't get you the kid but you have tons of s***** boats and their crap and that's what you can use and I looked over and I said wow they're right there they have the strands in them and just had some carbon I know how to do it too and you have the steel and other stuff motors you can melt down and that's the holes are okay you might want to use those and he says no you're useless and say what about for fishing it says oh yeah we can fish with those inland and you need tons of that so I'm going to rephrase it we can't use those there's a lot of fibers that stuff around though pools and stupid s*** like that Jacuzzis you can't use the jacuzzi but we can use the motors for hot water and for pumping water so we're going to get on that and take all these jacuzzis part and it's perfect

That was Brad and he's thanks his friend and he says you're welcome and they're going to be all right they're going to do a whole bunch of this kid stuff and there's a ton of Jacuzzis and it's high quality high purity fiberglass and there's a ton of covered steel too carbon steel huge amounts of it and they've got a few buildings to dismantle but really the stuff stinks there's a huge number of things they can do right now and this is one of them they need transportation regardless for a whole bunch of reasons they need to move things around and these lawn mowers have little trailers and you can take the trailer and painted the color of the car or Jeep or bronco so they want that too and they have a whole crap over these Ride along mowers there's probably 700 trillion of these dumb lawn mowers singing there and they all work and just California alone we're going to send the kid and the molds and you can take all the lawn mowers to Australia if you had to and they like it

Thor Freya

Olympus

[itwasthereaminuteago]

|| Bleeding Heart ||

Pairing: Frank Castle X female reader

Rating: E 18+

Tags/warnings: period pain, period sex, period hangups, unprotected sex, thigh riding, Frank's a big caring hunk of love.

A/n: I had already done a Matt 'period piece' so it was time for Frank, plus I'm very sore atm and need this 🥺

As he watched you get ready for work from the bed, it didn't take long for him to notice that something was wrong. Of course he knew you loved your sleep but the way you reluctantly dragged yourself from the covers and trudged between the bedroom and bathroom, he could see you were in pain from the way you carried your body. When you necked a couple of painkillers that just confirmed it.

"You're staying home today."

You turn around blearily, "wha?"

"Phone work and tell them you're not comin' in."

"I'm fine!" you protest, if slightly pathetically.

"No, you're stayin' here with me."

"Frank I can't just-"

You see the grit in his expression. "Do it or I'll do it for ya."

You roll your eyes and do as he asks, secretly relieved you could have some time to rest. Frank tells you to put your pyjamas back on. He throws back the covers and you crawl back into bed and lay on top of him, your thighs on either side of one of his, burrowing your head in the space between his neck and shoulder.

"Where are you hurtin'? Is your back sore baby?"

You hum and nod, melting into the big warm mass of his body as he starts gently rubbing and kneading his hands into your lower back, and its not long before you're dozing off in his arms.

You wake yourself with your own moan, suddenly very aware of hot, wet throbbing between your legs as your hips absently grind against something firm.

You crack open an eye and things start to come back into focus. Frank's looking down at you, a sly smirk on his lips.

"Nice dream, huh?" He teases. Your cheeks suddenly feel hot and you bury your face again so you don't have to look at him. You didn't really know why you felt embarrassed about it, he'd seen you a lot more desperate before, maybe it was just because you felt a bit more vulnerable on your period.

"Aw don't stop on my account. C'mon, I know it feels good." His huge hands press into your hips and encourage you to keep moving against his thigh and you can't suppress the little noise that escapes you as you let your body move for him, pressing up off your hands to sit up. '''sides, you told me orgasms were good for the pain, remember..." He coaxes you to continue chasing your sleepy high, one hand on your ass and the other sliding up underneath your shirt over your back.

You nod, "I did, they are... oh-" you start moving your hips faster and Frank keeps holding you steady against him. You can feel his cock pressing against the front of your hip and try sneaking a hand down to brush against him but he stops you.

"Nah, don't you worry bout me, you take what you need sweetheart. Be a good girl f'me."

As soon as he starts with the praise you are gone. You close your eyes as you move, drawing ever closer to release, your fingers curling around the sheets. Frank loves seeing you like this. If he could pinpoint what turns him on the most it would be this switch, the moment where you swung from feeling a little self conscious, to unabashedly taking control of your pleasure with both hands. You take hold of his arm, guiding his hand to your breasts for him to caress, squeeze and pinch. He touches his free hand to your neck, his thumb stroking along your jaw towards your chin. His cock twitches as he only barely has to brush over your lips for your mouth to drop open obediently and your tongue to flatten against it. Your lips close around his thumb and you suck between your rising moans. He feels you squeeze around his leg, your movements becomingly increasingly erratic as you crest. When he flexes his thigh muscles beneath you it's all over, shuddering, gasping and whining his name as your orgasm floods your body with endorphins and you feel the warm release of slick and blood as you ride his thigh, gradually slowing the roll of your hips and breathing heavily with the effort.

"So fuckin' beautiful," he muses, stroking his hands down your sides as you come back to him, your eyes dark with hunger as they meet his. As you lay off to the side of him, your hand creeps it's way up his thigh.

"You feel better? Can I do somethin' else for ya?" he asks, even though your arousal is still written all over your face as you nod. But even so, you look a bit unsure.

"I- will you-" you stutter, the words just won't come out. Frank has to say it for you.

"I'll fuck you baby, is that what you need, huh?"

You dip your head. Years of ingrained shame winning over something that should be perfectly natural - is perfectly natural.

"it's all... the blood and everything, you don't have to -"

He stops you right there, with lips soft on your forehead then on your own, his eyes kind. "D'ya think I care about the blood? Anyways, that's what we got a shower for." He gets up to retrieve an old towel from the laundry basket, spreading it on the bed. "Where d'ya want me angel?" he asks, peeling off his sweatpants.

You just stare at him for a beat, until your brain catches up with what he's doing.

"Don't care, just want you." you respond, base desire kicking in and mesmerised as ever as his cock springs up and smacks against his stomach.

He chuckles and pats the towel. "C'mon and lay down then pretty girl."

You shimmy off your ruined underwear leaving it on the floor before you lie down on the bed. You keep your knees pressed together and Frank runs his palm slow up and down the outside of your thigh reassuringly. "Hey now, you're not gonna be worried bout any of that in a minute," he leans forward kissing you deep, his talented tongue distracting you from any residual self-consciousness as he slips his hand between your legs to spread them apart and settle between them. "Let me take care of you." he says, sitting back to rub the head of his cock teasingly over your clit before he's pushing it down between your slick inner labia to press against your entrance.

"Frank!" you whine as he stays exactly where he is. Impatient and horny, you hook your leg and your arms around him taking him a little by surprise as you pull him sharply forward into you. Sometimes in your haze of lust you forget just how big he is, and this is one of those times. You cry out at the initial burn and Frank grits his teeth as your cunt squeezes him like a vice. It feels like you're splitting apart as his cock spears all the way inside, bumping against your cervix.

"Shit baby, fuck! Slow down..slow down." He's full of care and concern as he remains still until he feels you relax, and it makes your heart jump.

You reach up to run your fingers through his hair and he noses your cheek. "M'sorry, I know I'm greedy."

He shakes his head and smiles. "I just don't wanna hurt ya. You good?"

The discomfort quickly gives way to the warm, satisfying sensation of having him so very close to you. "Yea, I'm good," you answer, tilting your hips and moving slow, experimentally, letting go of a deep sigh as the long drag of his cock stokes the heat within you again. He takes over, so gentle with you this morning, he knows exactly what you crave when you're like this, sometimes knowing what you need even better than yourself. He's the full spectrum and it constantly has you pinching yourself to check you're not in a dream. He could rail you rough and raw on a rooftop without breaking a sweat, or be so intimate making love to you with such tenderness like he was now.

You reach up to kiss him as he rocks sweetly into you. "Did I tell you I love you?"

He smiles, "every day baby."

"Well, here it is again. I fucking love you."

He chuckles, tracing the side of your face with his fingers. "this you gettin' all soft on me?"

You give him an incredulous look, "I'm always soft on you Castle."

"Mm, I've got the scratches to prove that ain't so..." he grins as you playfully push at him. "I fuckin' love you too sweetheart."

He keeps up the fluid, languid roll of his hips, pushing little addictive gasps of pleasure from your throat. "Love you," he repeats, "so much." his softly whispered words only adding to the growing tendrils of bliss spreading their way throughout your body. The intensity of the feeling ramps up as he lifts your leg higher and drives deeper, you tilt your head back and close your eyes, exposing your neck for him to shower kisses along as he hits the perfect spot within you.

"mm yeah, oh there, oh fuck Frank, right there..."

"That feel good honey?"

"S'good, s'good!" you moan and not-so-silently pray that he never stops making you feel this way, feeling his smile against your skin and the promise that he'll do his best if you'll do the same.

You're asking him if he's close and the truth is he's losing his mind over how you feel. So hot, tight, and slicker than you've ever been but he just nods and tries to focus on you. He knows you're just teetering on the edge, arching and pushing up against his body and ready to come apart.

"mm Frank..."

"I've gotcha." he growls, the rhythm of his thrusts steady as his fingers slide down between you to your clit, circling tight and raking your moans higher. You pull him impossibly close and he feels you tense and coiled underneath him for an instant, your body taking everything he can give you, and then, the sweet release happens. And god damn, the sounds you make and the way your pussy clenches around him, you make him want to live in this moment for fucking ever as he groans and spills inside you. He doesn't quit until he's sure you've had enough, until the shivers of your pleasure start to fade and you're telling him okay, okay.

After a quick shower you're both back in bed, and there's nothing but the soft hush of your breathing for a long while. Then, the gentle sounds of his lips kissing every bit of you he can reach. And then, giggles that quickly rise to laughter as his scruffy stubble tickles against your sensitive skin.

"Feelin' any better doll?"

You're curled up with his arm draped over you, idly stroking your lower belly.

"So, so much."

"Alright. Gonna look after ya today, anything you need you just holler, I'll come runnin'."

He's always such a big soft puppy afterwards, and it makes your heart melt. You ruffle his damp hair and he retaliates by kissing you almost breathless.

"Can we have pancakes for breakfast, hm?" It's a pointless question as you already know the answer, but you love how his eyes light up when you mention it.

"Hell yeah, you know I ain't ever gonna say no to that." After one more kiss he's throwing the covers back and you're watching him walking about butt naked in the kitchen except for your waist apron, making coffee and mixing batter with a wink thrown your way.

"I fucking love you Frank."

"I fuckin' love you too."

.

.

Hi! If you enjoy my fics please consider reblogging, it means that others get to enjoy them too! I also love to hear if there's anything in particular you liked, please comment! Thank you so much for reading 💕

[alyssalenko]

Get to Know the Blogger

I was tagged by my precious @starsandskies and @briarfox13 thank you so much!

I will tag @shretl @charlatron @slothssassin @bardofheartdive @foofyschmoofer @hunnybadgerv @a-shakespearean-in-paris @liaorban @randomlygeneratedstring @natsora @ooachilliaoo @gugle1980   @illusivesoul @seigephoenix @spaced0lphin @citadelsushi @soldiermom1973 @kenshi-vakarian7 @darth-salem-emperor-of-earth @samfishers @badwolf626 @thefrostyshepard and anyone else who wants to play!

1: Why did you choose your url?

When I read Frank Beddor's The Looking Glass Wars I loved that he spelled Alice 'A-L-Y-S-S' and so when I created my first Shepard without my sister her name was Alyss. I fell in love with Kaidan and dreamed up their happy ending--they got married and she became Alyss Alenko. XD

2: Any side blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them.

I have 2 RP blogs my sister made for me but I never really got into them because they were her characters based off me rather than my own.

3: How long have you been on tumblr?

Since December 2012, but I really started using it in February 2013 when my sister and I were upset about the refs during the Superbowl.

4: Do you have a queue tag?

Nope. I don't queue my posts. If I am here there may be posts, my blog is dead if I am not.

5: Why did you start your blog in the first place?

My sister actually made it for me because she was here and wanted to have an easier time sending me funny posts.

6: Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

Oh, it’s my commission from the amazingly talented @soddingcloudgazer of my Mirialan Jedi Knight and her LI Doc. I honestly just love the way she draws Doc and I like seeing those two so happy and in love--and you can just feel the sexual tension of him trying to keep her with him instead of letting her run off and do something dangerous.

7: Why did you choose your header?

Because my darling @starsandskies did an amazing job bringing a soft and sexy moment between Alyss and Kaidan to life and I love it too damn much?

8: What’s your post with the most notes?

I have two because I didn't think it was fair for me to count one as my own when it is @mrnicholas's art of my Thanemancer Taye Shepard. The other is an edit/photo manip of Cullen Rutherford

9: How many mutuals do you have?

I don’t know 😅

10: How many followers do you have?

929. I block every suspicious blog so I like to think they’re real people... but who knows?

11: How many people do you follow?

604 but I am slowly trimming it down.

12: Have you ever made a shitposts?

I don't think they count as shitposts? So no?

13: How often do you use tumblr each day?

I check it once or twice per day. Sometimes more, depending on my mood or if I have a new fic or edit to share.

14: Did you ever have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won?

Nope. I make it a habit to be as nice as possible because we all come here to escape.

15: How do you feel about ��you need to reblog this” posts?

They make me irrationally angry? I put what I want on my blog when I want. It's a mess but it's my happy place.

16: Do you like tag games?

I am totally happy to do them as I get to learn more about my followers/my mutual and even get to flush out my OCs

17: Do you like ask games?

Of course! I tend to get the best prompts from them!

19: Do you have a crush on a mutual?

Nope. I love them though, they are amazing!

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Seventy-Eight

Words: 3k

Warning(s): explicit language, violence, substance abuse

Tag List: @unknownoblivion  @edwardtriggerhandzz  @haileynicoleseavey17  @cierrasixx19  @oskea93  @mgkobsessed  @sharon6713  @itsametaphorbriansblog  @miriampraez  @allie-mcginn @xpoisonousrosesx  @rebeccaphillips14  @nicholeh7 @lilmou5ie  @tamedhearts  @divaanya  @6ixx6ixx  @ratedrkohardychick91  @floregrohlssard  @oldschoolimagineblog  @thanks2pete  @abaldboi  @liith-ium  @caos18blog  @ytwahsog  @scarecrowmax  @random-internet-user-4471  @solohqrry  @sparxx27  @kaitieskidmore1  @cruecifymesixx    @meetthesixxter   @sublimeprincesswasteland  @arianareirg  @girlnight-terror

@fancywasmyname1  @teller258316  @ggorehorror  @blowinmeupwithherlove  @xrosegoldwolfx  @mylifeisjustafeverdream  @redlipscrystalskies14 @str4nge-haze @reigns420 @sixxseconds2love @leatherandheels @dogmom2014 @allyouneedislove-mp3 @n0-self-c0ntro1 @viinceneil

LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED

"H-Hi." Deana tries to keep her composure upon the sight of Nikki freshly off-stage. 

He looks more pale than he was before heading to play, his sweat cloaked body shaking slightly. 

His mother, her dark hair curled and bright red lips tugging into a sappy smile as tears bubble in her eyes.

Even without probably knowing the whole story, Axl and the guys know Nikki doesn't have a relationship with his mom, and the nightmare about to take place has them slowly leaning against the wall of the hallway, quietly looking down, uncomfortable with getting caught in the middle of this. 

"What are you doing here?" Nikki asks, confused, more than likely questioning if its a hallucination from mixing too many drugs or not. 

"I made the arrangement." Doc states chipperly, stupidly thinking Nikki would be happy. "An early Christmas present." He adds. 

"I wanted to see you," She tells her son, taking a few steps closer, "I wanted to see both of you...I've already missed out on so much." She explains, looking at me. "I-I know the timing is off, but I really wanted to talk to you." 

"No, the timing isn't off--" I try to assure her. 

"--Don't waste your breath, Viv, she's just gonna ask for money and then disappear for another ten years." Nikki scoffs, brushing past her. 

"Frank--"

"--That's not my name." He snaps to her. 

"It's the name on your birth certificate, Frankie. Frank Ferana. It might not be as glamorous as 'Nikki Sixx' but--" 

"--It's Nikki. Legally. It's Sixx. Legally. It's her last name. Legally." He refers to me and she clenches her jaw. "And any kids I have are gonna have that last name. Legally. I'm not 'Frank', or 'Frankie', and I'm certainly not a fucking 'Ferana' so don't even start that shit."

"You're still my baby." She tells him, trying not to cry. "I came all this way to see you." She adds, wrapping her arms around him. 

I see the glimmer of a little boy in his eyes, for a split second, then it's quickly pushed aside and replaced with that of an angry, abused, hurt, scorned, abandoned dog. 

And he's going for the throat in a moment the second she says:

"Oh, my Frankie." 

He's shoving her off of him so hard she nearly goes to the floor. 

"That's not my fucking name!" He screams at her, throwing his bottle of Jack at the ground at her heeled-boot covered feet. 

He's storming off, Doc following after him, and Fred takes a breath and goes to Deana, to politely usher her out. 

"That's fucked." Izzy mumbles, shaking his head slightly, going to their dressing room and I walk behind them. 

"Nikki--"

"--Who the fuck do you think you are?! Huh?! Who the hell are you to bring my personal life front and center for every God damn body to see?!" 

"I didn't realize you and your mother weren't on good terms." Doc tells him, honestly. 

"You think I'm this fucked up for the hell of it?! You think I'm this way after growing up with parents who gave a shit?! Really?!" Nikki laughs humorlessly.

"Nikki, I'm sorry, alright?" 

"No, you're not, you don't give a shit and you never have, you're just another greedy fuck getting his rocks off from the money in my pocket but I'm done!" He yells, turning to walk away. "You don't know what's fucking best for me, you don't care about me, you don't care about the band, you're not my fucking father and you sure as shit aren't my manager anymore so just go get fucked, Doc, you're fucking fired!" He calls. 

"You're not fired." I assure Doc, wanting to go after him, but not able to bring myself to. 

He doesn't want to talk to me about it. 

I am surprised to see Axl rub his forehead and roll his jaw before stalking past me, Nikki's way. 

"Where you going?" I ask him. 

"I fucking hate my mom." Is all he says as he goes by. 

I didn't know what exact issue Axl had with his own mother, but I'd later find out it was because her horrible judgment in men and what abuse she'd allow him and his siblings to endure from those men, along with her forceful hand in religion that she and Axl's stepfather enforced brutally on their kids.

"Did Doc really not mean to set that up?" Steven asks me when I get into their dressing room. 

"No, he didn't." I reply. 

"Is Nikki gonna be okay?" Tansy asks quietly. 

"I don't know, Tansy." I roll my eyes and she furrows her brows, slightly. 

"Do you even care?" She asks me and I look at her. 

"Tans--" Duff starts. 

"--No, I mean, really, Vivian. Do you even care?" She cuts him off. 

"Excuse me?" I ask, practically seeing the dullness in her eyes of a mixed-drug high.

Without a doubt coke and smack.

"Of course I care, Tansy. Just because he and I are separated doesn't mean I want him to suffer."

"Way to take one for the team by sleeping with Duff, then, because surely that is the one thing that has to be done to prevent Nikki's suffering." She states. 

"What I do and who I do it with is my business, Tansy." I tell her, crossing my arms. 

"Sure doesn't sound that way when everybody on the same floor as you can hear nothing but, 'ahh, ahh, Duff, ahh!'" She mimics moaning. 

"Maybe I'm staying under Duff so much because if I don't, you'll take it as an open invitation, and there really are some people you don't have to try to sleep with mandatorily based on their wallet size, Tansy." 

"Just like there are some people you don't have to sleep with based on whether or not they're gonna be big rockstars or not." She shoots back. 

"Wanna be the pot or the kettle?" I ask. 

"I want you to stop adding fuel to the fire and then acting like your hands are clean while smiting all of us." She outbursts. 

"Smite you for adding to his problems? Offering him drugs when he's already going down hill? Letting him think screwing another woman is okay--not even screwing her, having an entire relationship with her." I correct myself. 

"Given the circumstances of your marriage, he needed an escape." She says next. 

"Given the circumstances of your new-found smack-induced courage, you act like you need my fist to knock your teeth out." 

"Viv--"

"--Then you'll really be laying on your back to get work." 

"But at least I do work. What do you do? Aside from spend Nikki's money and sleep with his friends?" 

"I'm not killing him like you and Sparkie have been with your junkie bullshit." I manage to keep myself from having an outburst, more concerned with Nikki's crisis with his mom. 

"Not yet, at least." She mumbles as I'm walking out. 

"Where you guys going?" Tommy asks as we head to leave for the bus. 

"Um… about to pack our stuff up and head out?" Izzy replies.

"No, no, no, just because Nikki's parade's been pissed on doesn't mean ours has to be." Tommy suggests to them. 

"Yeah, c'mon it's our last night hangin' out for a while." Vince points out, two groupies already under each arm. 

"I was gonna check on Sixx." Slash explains. 

"I'm fine." Nikki shows up, his hands on Slash's shoulders, tightly in an aggravating manner, making Slash chuckle as he twists away from him. 

Axl isn't far behind, he and Izzy looking at the invitation to hangout with the guys one last time on this tour, hesitantly. 

"What the hell," Izzy shrugs. 

"So glad you said that, man, because we have a special surprise." Nikki grins, beckoning them with his finger. 

"Stevie, c'mon!" Duff exclaims from behind me, Steven exiting their dressing room with Tansy behind him. 

"You good?" He asks Nikki. 

"Yeah." Nikki assures him. "I have a present." He adds, leading the guys to the double doors of what I assume is a bigger room. 

Sure enough, he opens the door, and at least ten girls are lined up, naked, asses up, thick lines of coke down their spines. 

Nausea nestles it's way into my stomach, but Tommy, Vince and Nikki look as if this is their promised land. 

Even Steven looks slightly off-put by the brazen display. 

Complete disinterest cascades off of Duff, a heavy puff of cigarette smoke leaving his nostrils with the huff of his unamused breath. 

"Who's first?" Nikki asks. 

Naturally, the guys look to their "leader," and Axl reluctantly rolls his eyes and walks over to the first girl. 

It's like he refuses to acknowledge she's naked, his main focus is the line of coke on her back. 

He snorts one-eighth of the line before deciding that's enough. 

I don't blame him--the way his fingers hold at the bridge of his nose makes me wince because I know it probably burns like a bitch. 

"Boo!" Tommy disappointedly calls to Axl as he walks out. 

He's had his party. 

Izzy follows. 

"More for us." Nikki shrugs, smirking. 

He looks at me directly in the eyes, heavy black liner sharpening the contrast of his hazel eyes as he keeps my gaze, spitefully unbuckling his belt and he starts unlacing his pants, making his way to the girl Axl was at earlier. 

He is not…

Duff's snatching me out of the room only milliseconds before Nikki enters the girl in sync with snorting the line up her skin.

That was that.

It's a bittersweet draw to an end, "thank you" and "damn, I'm gonna miss you" seeming to be on everyone's lips as hugs and high-fives go around between all the boys once we get back to L.A.

I rub my lips together and smile softly as I hand Fred my purse to put in the car, sighing softly, smiling when he looks down at me. 

"See ya later, kid." He tells me and tears swell in my eyes as I wrap hug him tightly, taking him off guard a little. "Don't kill each other...not even over that dumb shit he pulled tonight." He says, referring to the groupie cocaine platter. 

"I'll try." I mumble, wiping my eyes quickly before stepping up to say bye to the guys. 

Steven and Slash are pretty easy, but Axl just stares at me for a moment before reluctantly wrapping his arms around me and hugging me tightly. 

"I'm sorry I was an asshole this entire trip." He mumbles lowly in my ear. 

"I'm sorry I almost got you kicked off." I reply in the same low tone. 

"You're one of the reasons they took us in the first place." He states, pulling away to look at me, cupping my face in his hands, grinning. "You're gonna keep up my lie that we're siblings, right?" He asks and I chuckle. 

"You guys are gonna make it big and I need a meal ticket so of course." I shrug and his smile grows wider. "I love you." I tell him. 

"I love you, too." He assures me, kissing me on the cheek, giving me one last squeezing hug before heading to their bus. 

Izzy looks at me for a moment. 

"Izzy." I say to him. 

"Viv." He acknowledges me and steps to the bus. 

Just before Duff can tell me 'bye', arms are locking around my waist, and pulling me against the person they belong to. 

"Izzy?" I ask after a moment. 

"We're not friends." He says, pulling away to leave, leaving me and Duff. 

"Um, I'll see you later?" I offer and he rubs his lips together, his eyes over my shoulder, and I look to see Nikki and a woman that we'd picked up from the airport, getting into the car. 

I turn back to face Duff, biting my tongue to keep my tears back. 

"You can stay with me tonight." Duff offers. 

"Really?" 

He just smiles down at me. 

I inhale the familiarly comforting scent of cigarette smoke as we walk into Duff's apartment, dropping my bags and running to the bedroom, face planting into the mattress, exhausted. 

The weight of Duff's body laying on top of me making me laugh, his own chuckle further making me grin. 

"I'm so tired." I tell him.

"Me too." He replies, and I turn over underneath him, wrinkling my nose.

"You stink." I say. 

"I think I smell pretty sexy." He grins, teasingly. 

"No." I shake my head a little, scrunching my face to my shoulder when he tries to kiss my neck. "Go shower." I giggle when he tries again. 

"Come shower with me." He counters. 

"I don't feel like it and I don't stink, so--ew, Duff!" I squeal as he takes his shirt off that reeks of sweat and rubs it all over my face and hair. 

"What about now?" He asks and I pick up the pillow above my head and start hitting at him with it.

After a few hits are gotten in, he's getting off the bed, stretching. 

"You coming?" He asks when he walks to the bathroom. 

"I guess." I reply, following after him. 

Once I get out and have one of Duff's shirts on, I go to the kitchen to grab some water before bed, the quietness of the apartment allowing different thoughts to invade my mind. 

I can't help but wonder what Nikki's doing. Is he high? Is he drunk? Is he even still alive? They leave in a few days for Japan but I honestly don't believe they should go. They need help. 

I think at this moment everyone's just trying to see if they can get away with pressing at them a little more without anybody snapping. 

But by the looks of it, Nikki is pretty damn close to snapping, and Tommy anf Vince and Mick aren't far behind at all. 

Nikki. 

My heart tightens in my chest, remembering last Christmas, how he sat curled under our tree, shooting up. 

He'd get strung out, then lay underneath the tree and stare up at the lights for hours. 

"Are we gonna buy a Christmas  tree?" I ask, looking at the empty living area. 

"If you want to." He calls to me from the bedroom.

"I want to." I reply, going into the room and getting in bed while he follows. 

"Yeah?" 

"Yeah. You know, homey-ness and stuff." I add. "Especially if I'm gonna be here longer." I add and he falls beside me. 

"I'll get a tree tomorrow." He assures me, kissing me chastely before yawning and getting comfortable, and I turn off the lamp and lay down, too. 

He goes to sleep in no time, but two hours later, in the early hours of morning, I smile to myself in the dark room, Christmas lights from the street shining into the window, lighting up the room and cascading a comforting dim light over Duff's sleeping body next to me. 

Reaching over, I run my fingertips softly against his cheek, pushing blonde strands of his hair out of the way, his eyes slowly blinking open slightly before a small tug of a smile pulls his lips slightly. 

"Sorry." I whisper, not meaning to have woken him up. 

"It's okay." He says quietly, closing his eyes again. "I love you, Vivian." He adds, his eyes staying closed, but he grabs my hand that's on his cheek, and presses a kiss to my palm, holding my hand when he's done. 

I snuggle closer to him, laying still and closing my eyes, too, while I reply, "I love you, too," the way I wish I would have done to Nikki all these years. 

Years later, while on what I presumed to be his deathbed, he told me that simple moment was what made him feel sure that I was the one. I took everything he had done up to that point with stride. But thinking he was going to die, reflecting on everything that could have been between us but never got to be, and hearing him tell me, "there's a ring I got you years ago when we thought we were gonna be together, but I never gave it to you. Mandy never knew about it. Linda doesn't know about it, but it's on my closet shelf and I don't want to go without giving it to you," broke my heart more than anything he could've done up to that point.

NIKKI

I turn over, seeing the silhouette of the brunette I picked up at the airport, her sheet-covered chest rising and falling with each breath. 

A part of me feels irritated because her perfume is contaminating Vivian's side of the bed that still smells like her. 

I've been reduced to plucking Viv's clothing from drawers or from in the closet and smelling it. That makes me sound like a fucking stalking creep, but it's the truth. 

How the fuck did we get here, again? 

Oh, right, me not able to keep my dick in my pants, and the woman I didn't keep my dick in my pants for, didn't keep her mouth shut.

I sit up, walking to the bathroom to piss. When I'm done I look at myself in the mirror and feel a little impressed. 

I don't look as bad as I thought. 

Well, kinda. 

I splash water on my face, wincing at the dark circles under my eyes. 

I end up staring at myself for God knows how long, remembering how Vivian would wake up and come in here to get me back in bed if I left her for too long because she didn't like sleeping by herself. 

I smile a little, slowly closing my eyes, feeling her touch across my back, the softness of her lips pressing to the skin of my spine before her cheek presses to the same place before she sleepily mumbles out, "come back to bed." 

Opening my eyes, for a split second, I see her. Standing behind me, green eyes peering at me over my shoulder, the feeling of her holding me...it's gone in a flash. She's gone in a flash. 

My nose burns with the oncoming tears cooking up in my eyes, and I erase them quickly with another splash of water to thr face. 

[keepmeinthedark]

Growing Pains || A Marlene McKinnon fanfiction

Chapter Two - Hogwarts

Chapter One here

Finding the confidence to ask someone if she could sit with them was proving to be a lot harder then Marlene originally thought. Especially with the thought of her fight with her sister so clear in her head.

Marlene was overreacting, she knew it but she didn't care. Steph lied and her and she hated being lied to. Steph knew this.

They had both been brought up in what Marlene thinks was the right way. To respect others, to not take the purity of others blood into account, to be kind and fair and brave. That Slytherins were anything but, that Gryffindor was the house that every member of their family was apart of and that was for a reason.

But surely she knew better then this? Maybe if her sister was in Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff she would be less mad. She didn't want to be mad at Steph, for she was the only person on this train that she knew. She didn't think about making friends on the train, she had just assumed she would enjoy the ride with Steph and her friends and then start actually putting herself out there to her own year once sorted.

Luckily she was able to find a carriage of her own, at the very front of the train, next to where the prefects were. She took her seat and a deep breath.

Now what?

She hadn't really packed anything in her bag that could be used as entertainment. She expected that she would have people to talk to for the train ride.

She sighed and looked out the window, this was going to be a long journey. And the train hadn't even taken off yet.

It was about twenty minutes before the train took off and then another ten minuets for someone to join Marlene.

A small plump boy, draw coloured hair and baby face entered the carriage. "Umm I hope you don't mind but could I sit here?" he asked quietly.

Marlene had to stop herself from jumping with excitement, he was clearly someone who would be in her year and she could use the company.

"Oh yes! Of corse, please take a seat," she beamed. "My names Marlene, Marlene McKinnon."

"Peter Pettigrew," the boy replied, shaking her outstretched hand and sitting in the seat opposite her. "Are you a first year too?"

Marlene nodded, "Yes I am, I'm so excited. Aren't you? Oh I can't wait to be sorted and start classes," she rambled, slightly bouncing up and down in her seat.

Peter smiled, "So am I. What house do you think you'd be in?"

"Gryffindor probably," she replied, trying not to sound as confident as she actually was. "My whole family has been Gryffindor, only makes sense. What about you? Are you pureblood?"

Peter nodded, "My family has been mixed and matched. No real legacy for me, although I'm hoping to also make Gryffindor."

Marlene nodded and politely smiled, trying not to let it show on her face that she thought he would rather be suited in Hufflepuff in her opinion.

"Do you have any siblings?" she asked, she didn't want to sit in silence with Peter. She had to make friends somehow and this seemed as good of a time as ever.

Peter nodded, "A sister, Beth her name is. She's a year younger then me. Have you?"

Marlene hesitated. Really she should've known that Peter would ask back but it still caught her off guard. She had just told Peter that her entire family was Gryffindors, but Steph in fact wasn't a Gryffindor at all.

Still, she was her sisters. And it wasn't like she expected Peter to actually make Gryffindor, he probably would never notice.

"I have one older sister, a younger brother and two younger sisters."

"Wow, big family you've got there."

Marlene let out a little laugh, "Yeah, I guess... But I like having a big family. I love my siblings as I know you must love your sister."

Peter nodded, "Yeah, definitely."

Marlene and Peter continued talking throughout the ride and rode the boats to the castle with two other girls.

Just the sight of the castle made Marlenes stomach grow butterfly's, it was everything she ever dreamed of and walking into the great hall for the first time was surly a moment she would never forget.

"When I call your name, come forward and I will place the hat on your head. When you've been sorted please join your house table," Professor McGonagall said, before pulling out a scroll and speaking the first name.

"Black, Sirius"

Black, Marlene had heard of that family before, all Slytherins, all purists, all arseholes. She narrowed her eyes as she watched the black haired boy take his seat up on the stool. This one would be obvious.

"GRYFFINDOR!" the hat shouted and the hall went silent.

Marlene allowed herself to glance back at the Slytherin table, where Sirius' family were, ready to welcome him with open arms. Now all sat with their jaws open and eyebrows raised.

Looking back at Sirius almost broke her heart, he looked... scared.

Marlenes eyes didn't leave Sirius for the majority of the sorting. It wasn't until she hear "MacDonald, Mary" that her head shot back to the front. She should be called up soon.

Mary was a small girl, with beautiful brown skin and was wearing a black hijab. She walked up to the stall and sat down, it didn't take long for the hat to yell "GRYFFINDOR," causing the hall to applause while Mary joined her house.

"McKinnon, Marlene."

For whatever reason, Marlene decided to wait a total of three seconds before actually moving, as if she was scared that there were two Marlene McKinnons in her year or perhaps if she misheard the professor and went up before her name was called.

She sat at the stool and faced the great hall. Only then did she feel so incredible small. So many eyes all staring up at her, waiting to see where she'd be placed.

She found Stephanie easily, she was sat at the Slytherin table, close to the edge of the table, as if she was getting ready to welcome Marlene into the house.

"Oh god please not Slytherin" she whispered.

Not Slytherin? Pity, I reckon you'd do rather well there.

Marlene had to stop myself from jumping too much. Of course the hat talked, she had been told this. She had been told every little detail about the sorting ceremony but now that she was here she was terrified. Steph being a Slytherin had completely caught her off guard. She just wished the hat would hurry on and sort her already.

Getting impatient are we? So Hufflepuff will never do.

Well you've got that right, she thought. Just please say Gryffindor and leave me be.

Gryffindor? You have bravery yes but also creativity and wit and, if you use it correctly, intelligence. Perhaps Ravenclaw is more your style.

Ravenclaw? She hadn't thought of herself as a Ravenclaw before. Always Gryffindor. She had to be Gryffindor.

You don't have to be anything the hat spoke again. Here all you have to be is yourself and you are not a Gryffindor

Marlene could feel the hat move on her head, she knew what was coming.

Wait, I'm not-

"RAVENCLAW!"

Marlene didn't remover much of the feast from then on. Instead she sat at the Ravenclaw table sulking. She looked like a fool.

Of corse Peter had made it into Gryffindor, along with Sirius, Mary, three other boys and a girl with red hair. She had never envied strangers more.

She couldn't keep her eyes off the Gryffindor table, they all sat there talking and laughing with their prefects. The Ravenclaws around her tried to get through. Also sorted into her house were two other girls, Emmeline and Hestia. And two boys, Caradoc and Benjy. Their prefect, Frank was currently answering every question her four housemates could come up with.

"It's a small batch this year isn't it?" A girl said, taking a seat next to Frank. "Hi, my names Pandora. I'm head girl," she said, shaking each other their hands.

"Small as in number or height?" Frank joked.

Pandora laughed and shoved him "Oh shut it Longbottom, Merlín knows how you got prefect you can't go abusing your power by bullying first years," she laughed causing the others around them to laugh along.

"Anyways, we better go off to bed. Before everyone starts clearing out and we end up losing one of you. Follow me firsties," Frank said loudly, getting up from his seat.

The five first years followed him through the castle until they had reached Ravenclaw tower.

Marlene had to admit the Ravenclaw common room was beautiful. Frank lead them down the staircase and sat the five of them on the blue sofas by the fire.

"Right, well this is it! Umm just a few ground rules that Ravenclaw house has had for a while and a few insights of other houses and all that.

"Firstly, you're welcome to borrow any book only condition is that you give it back. A rule that I'm pretty sure all houses have are parties are allowed but Hufflepuff usually take care of Halloween because they're closest to the food, there's a ball every year right before the Christmas holidays, although only forth year and above are allowed, sorry guys and parties for such events such as birthdays we say third year and above are allowed to host those. Like no offence yall are cute but nobody knows who you are or care about the fact that you're turning twelve so-" he shrugged.

"Boys I warn you, don't go up to the girls dorm by your own will you will regret it. Ummmm what else is there...? Okay if I think of anything else I'll tell you but until then, follow me youngsters," he quickly jogged to a door under the balcony, down a corridor leading to two stair cases.

"Ladies, follow those stairs up to the first door and you will find your dorm room. You'll find that your things have already been sent up for you. Boys, follow me," and with that he, Caradoc and Benjy were gone.

It was Hestia that lead the way to the dorms and immediately jumped on the closest bed. Emmeline then took the middle one leaving Marlene to take the one furthest from the door.

The three girls unpacked in silence until Hestia spoke up, "You're quiet," she said, looking at Marlene.

Marlene just shrugged, "I guess."

Hestia didn't respond but Marlene caught her and Emmeline sharing a glance.

"Well, I was thinking about going down to the common room. Maybe we could get the boys, try to know each other a little better. You two up for it?" Emmeline then asked.

Hestia nodded smiling but Marlene shook her head, "I'm actually a bit tired. Might go to bed early after writing to my folks," she lied. Really she had no intention in writing to her parents until she could properly talk to Stephanie.

The two girls nodded and left the dorm, leaving Marlene on her own.

She sighed and got changed quickly before getting into bed.

"This isn't so bad," she told herself. So far Hogwarts was nothing like she expected but it wasn't all bad. Could've been worse definitely.

With that thought in mind, Marlene turned off the lamp and slowly but surly fell asleep.

[renee-writer]

A Braw Day Arc Two Chapter 1 A Very Scottish Wedding

As promised, a second arc to A Brawl Day( with Braw spelled correctly). We start with a wedding.

She stands, in her gown. White with accents of plaid. She had agreed to his request for a Scottish wedding. She wants to see him decked out as the Viking warrior that flows through his blood. Wants to see Boyd in a kilt. But mostly because neither had the wedding they wished for the first time. Her and Frank had married at the registrar, he and Mary had also eloped with Jane already on the way.

She wants all the finery, the to do of being a bride. His traditions are more fun then her staid English one's so… She smiles even her corset is plaid, tucked high on her thigh. She feels a bit warm at the thought of him taken it off. They have been celibate over the last month to make tonight special.

Her hair and Jane's are decorated with thistles and forget-me-nots. She will carry the same. The wedding party is simple, just them and their children. Her mum will escort her down the aisle. She smiles down at her soon to be step daughter.

“You are quite lovely Jane.”

“Thank you. You are beautiful Mam Claire.” She hugs her carefully to her side.

Her mum comes in. “The lads are ready. Lord you are both so beautiful.”

“Thank you. Is he nervous?”

“Yes but he will be fine once he sees you. Ready? Jane, Boyd is right outside the doors to the sanctuary. Recall a slow march?”

“Aye Granny Beauchamp.” She smiles at the little girl with affection. Gaining both a son and granddaughter today. They all step that way. They bagpiper, playing the Wedding song, fires Claire's blood. The doors are opened and Boyd takes his sister's arm and they step out. A soft ‘ahhh' greets their appearance.

Claire holds her mum's hand as the bagpipe changes to the wedding march. They step out.

He knew she would be lovely. But she takes his breath as the bairns take their places one on each side of him. Her hears the soft sound of awe from their guests. The white dress, his clan's colors around her waist, the flowers worked through her curls.

She is as equally awed. Jamie of the jeans and t's is now Jamie the Highland warrior. The kilt, the white linen shirt, the boots, the tarden tucked over his shoulder, the sporeen, where she knows their rings rest, a blasted sword on his side. She feels a bit faint at the sight of him. Her mum's hand keeps her steady.

They make it to him. Her mum kisses her hand before placing it in his. “Who gives this lass to be married to this lad?” Father O’Brien asks.

“Her son and I do.” She takes a seat next to Mary who smiles at her through her own tears. To see Jamie as happy as she was when marrying Alex…

“We are gathered here..” After the good Father welcomes them to the ceremony, he turns the service over to the couple. “Jamie and Claire have their own vows for each other. Claire?”

She tightens her grip on his hand. “I wasn't looking for you. I thought I had this all under control. Didn't think I needed anyone. But as you pointed out, there is a difference between want and need. I want you Jamie. I want you as my husband. I want you as Boyd's daddy. I want to be a grand step-mam to our daughter. I want to have a child with you. I want to grow old with you, see our grandbabies. Hold your hand until God parts us. I need you Jamie more then I have ever needed anyone before. I love you more then I ever thought possible. You fill a spot in my life and heart I never knew was empty. I commit to be a partner, lover, co-parent, friend, and anything else you need.”

“Oh Claire! I love you so much. God alone knows what I did to deserve you. To deserve the opportunity to be a daddy to sweet Boyd. My life was my job and my daughter. A good life but not a complete one until I saw you. It was like a bolt of lightning. I was gone. Yours from that moment on. I promise to be you and Boyd's protector, supporter, champion, for as long as I draw breath. You will have my name, my clan, my body. To you, my wife, I promise to be a lover, a partner, a helper, a friend. To always have a listening ear. To always be who you need. I love you.”

“Now the couple wish to also be joined in the auld way.” Father O’Brien says. Boyd steps up, and as Jamie had taught him, binds their wrist together with the Fraser colored cloth.

“Repeat after me,” Jamie instructs. She does. “You are blood of my blood, bone of my bone. I give you my body so us two may be one. I give you my spirit until our lives be done.”

Her mum is on the verge of tears at that. What they do next has her freely weeping.

“The Fraser's aren't just combining as a couple but as a family.” The priest says. Then Jamie bends down by Boyd.

“I also take you, Boyd Samuel, as my son. I will be the dad and friend you need. To remind you of my promise,” he pulls a small sheathed knife out of his sporeen. “It is t skin-do. The smallest knife a Highlander carries. As you get older, and with your mum's permission, I will teach you how to use it.” He places it in his hand. “I love you son.”

“Oh wow! I love you too da.” The entire congregation is in tears by this point. Then Claire carefully kneels by Jane.

“Jane Kathleen, I know you have a wonderful mum. I will never take her place. But, I want you to know, that I will always be here for you. As a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, for advise, hugs, well, whatever you need. You are so much more then my step-daughter. So, I give you this,” She open her hand to a small diamond necklace. “to remind you that you are as much family as Boyd is.”

“Mam Claire!” she lifts it up as they both cry. “will you put it on me?” She does and they hug. She stands back up and Jamie places the rings, silver and gold bands with thistles over them, on the bible. They are blessed. Placed on each others fingers.

“It is my pleasure to present Mr. And Mrs. Fraser and family. Kiss her Jamie.” He does with passion as a cheer arises.

[sirro85-blog]

Humans are Space Orcs

Part 5

Kneeling on the floor of the shuttle beside Kovac's body Wolf ripped open the medical kit and pulled out the TPAK needles and looked at the laminate instructions. He couldn't hear Panther over the screaming in his own head. Grabbing the first of the needles he unscrewed the cap and pressed his fingers into Kovac's chest, counting ribs, pointing his finger at the appropriate site he put the needle against the skin and pushed, it punctured the skin and drove into the muscle, once it was secure he drew the needle out and made it safe, nothing happened he checked the instructions again. Tissue embolus, snatching up the syringe he drew air into it and connected it to the needle. He depressed the plunger and when he detached the syringe he was rewarded with a prolonged hiss of air. He repeated it on the other side of the ribcage.

Knickers who had been trying to ventilate Kovac looked up with relief as Kovac drew a shallow breath. He drew two shuddering breaths and his breathing again started getting shallower.

Becca stared at the shuttle as it landed, behind her susserations passed through the unit as the whisper repeated themselves. "Kovac is dead?" "Kovac is dead!" Kovac can't be dead" "Kovac isn't dead!" "Kovac is dead" "Kovac..." "The Major..." her hands shook and she fought the urge to vomit. Her mouth was dry, her eyes burned, she had a metallic taste in her mouth and the tip of her nose seemed to tingle.

The doors to the shuttle opened, Wolf stepped out, a bound and gagged Flet chained to him and Panther. Gray, Ocampo Hemming and Richards stepped out. Then came a stretcher, beside it was Petra pale and tired looking. On the other side was Knickers who was staring at the Major's face till she stepped aside to let Dana and Staff King assess him. Then she looked up till she found Becca's face in the crowd.

"Massive left sided pneumothorax with resultant lower right atelectasis, hypovolaemic, query 2 minute episode of apnoea, sats 97 on 15 litres" Petra rattled off as Frank ran alongside the trolley.

Becca could still hear Petra talking as the doors swung shut on the med-bay. Wolf appeared at her side and gently steered her away from the crowd of soldiers into the side room. She managed two more strides before her knees gave way. Wolf guided her into a chair as she opened her mouth to scream and no sound came out. Trembling violently she felt Wolf's arms wrap tightly around her.

How long she they stayed like that Becca didn't know, but eventually she looked up to see Sergeant Panther, Captains Dorman, and Gillespie sitting in the room, standing leaning against the wall were Sergeants Fluke and Webb. Becca realised she was squeezing Wolf's arm with both hands, her nails had dug deep enough to draw blood from his wrist. Her fingers ached as she unclenched them. Wordlessly Panther poured her a glass of rum and passed it across, Becca downed it in one.

The door opened and a sombre looking Dana walked in, she looked at Wolf and then Dorman before crossing to stand infront of Becca.

"He's stable, we've repaired his lung but during the surgery...His heart stopped, he was down for nearly a minute. We'll have to run some tests when, if he wakes up."

Becca nodded numbly and tried to speak, she cleared her throat and tried again. "Thank you Dana, where's Frank?"

"Draining his last bottle of Courvoisier XO, I don't think he liked the part where the Major died." Dana's tone sounded angry.

"The problem with being the sort of man that earns love and loyalty like Kovac is people get upset when you die on them." Dorman said calmly, "I keep telling him he should try being unlikable like me."

"Does that mean I'm in command as senior officer?" Asked Gillespie, he winked at Becca and then Panther, "I think I'll reinstate prima nocta."

"Alright but Panther would break you little man," Becca said with a half-smile.

The officers began to talk and laugh, Dorman sent out the sergeants to talk to the men.

"She blames herself," Wolf said looking after Panther, "he was shielding her when he took the bolt."

Two days later Staff Sergeant King was glaring at the Major as he blew into a tube, "until I discharge you I am your commanding officer, I am emperor, king, high priestess and the Lord thy God, you can charm me all you want you mangy Scotch git, you are recuperating properly and doing your exercises."

"I'd tell you to get your oral fixation examined Frank but if blowing on this tube ten times a day will make you happy I'll do it. I will not be waiting over a month to heal naturally, now give me the AHMs so I can get on with my plan or I'll convince Angie to sneak me some, you know she'll do it too, and she'll take Petra down with her."

"If you have any kidney function left when this is all over I'll be amazed. Once this is resolved, I want you to come in for physio and a full medical check up."

"Once this is done I'll even let you check my prostate," Kovac grinned again.

The following morning Kovac laid in his bed while his officers sat around the room, Kovac asked about the prisoner.

"She seems willing to listen to us, I think she believes we can be manipulated." Dorman answered.

"I get the impression she is a little startled by the effectiveness of our raid and her capture. Our success has her worried."

"A huge success if you discount the Major's little problems," said Becca with a sneer.

"Everyone makes a fuss, i got injured. Hardly a fault of the mission, overall it was a complete success." Kovac replied.

"A complete success!? You fucking died!"

"Everybody makes a fuss," Kovac responded drawing a laugh from the others, Becca scowled.

Humans have a strange tendency to react to situations at a seemingly disproportionate level, small splits to their skin or a small shock can leave them "literally dying" an example of hyperbole. Kovac needing to be resuscitated on the operating table meant he said the injuries he had sustained, weren't ones he would reccomend.

The only thing bigger than a human's flair for the dramatic is a human's ability to down play something.

Kovac entered the room where the hostage was held, she eyed him as he crossed the room and as he sat in a chair she spoke.

"Major Radovan Kovac, formerly of the United Nations Galactic Defence Force then of the Galactic Council Defence Force and now leader of the human mercenary unit known as the Dark Horses, born Glasgow, Scotland in the year..."

"Impressive, you're Lorastayil claimant to the position of heir to the throne of the Flet Imperium, current prisoner to Major Kovac and judging by the speed of your heart, terrified of me no matter how calm you pretend to be," Kovac interrupted.

"My heart rate?" Lorastayil asked.

"The clip on your nose is taking measurements for us," Kovac raised a hand to silence the Flet. "Listen Kitty, we had a plan, it was simple, we use you to get to the rest of the royals and then we take all four of you out, we slip away into the darkness and watch as the rest of the royals fall apart trying to claim the top spot on the rubble, it would work. Believe me, I know how to topple governments I've done it before and Wolf, he's done it even more than me.

You know Wolf, he's the one that makes your heart skip a beat every time he glares at you, he has that effect on people."

Lorastayil stayed silent but her eyes never left Kovac's face, "however," Kovac continued, "while I'm sure pulling our plan off correctly would have been an end to this I'm not sure we would have achieved it without some losses and I've already lost one soldier over this, I'm not prepared to have another die to keep me alive, ironically it took dying to formalize my thoughts on this."

"The Flet Imperium," began the Flet.

"Oh do be quiet, the "Imperium" is barely two systems across and the only reason you get to keep it is because nobody wants it, everytime you've gotten expansionist the GCDF has slapped you down with one hand. You're a rogue state and the royal family makes you an easy mark to the sort of units that Wolf and I used to run, if I didn't care about collateral damage I'd break your little civilisation to teach you a lesson."

The Flet glared at Kovac and the Major held her gaze, "I have a plan however, one that keeps you alive, keeps my soldiers alive and puts an end to this."

Struggling to contain her anger Lorastayil stayed quiet for a few seconds before asking, "and what is this clever plan?"

"You take me back to Venita all the way to your capitol Genetry, we walk into the Royal Palace and you give me over to the Queen as your prisoner, you earn your place as heir apparent and the royal family win public support, I'm executed and my men are left alone. Now my men won't be happy about this, but because I'll do this voluntarily it'll hopefully take the edge off enough that they don't seek revenge."

"You'd die willingly?" Lorastayil asked her tone doubtful.

"No, not willingly but I'll accept it, better me than one of my men, that's the trick of being in command, my duty is to them, my leadership is the service I give them." He gave a sigh, "do you accept?"

"I have a choice?"

"Of course, I could always torture you till you agree to my first plan and we break your civilisation, not much of a choice but a choice none the less."

Kovac couldn't have successfully moved Lorastayil onto a shuttle secretly without assistance from Wolf, it appeared that Wolf was fully informed of the plan because as Kovac boarded the Shuttle I witnessed the two pause, shake hands solemnly and then part with a nod. An interaction I had never seen between the two of them before.

Unlike the human home planet, the Flet planet of Venita had developed as almost entirely a rainforest, since industrialisation much of the planet's growth had been cut back but it still retained it's verdant appearance. Even the capitol city of Gentry had a lot of green spaces. And in the centre, shining in the sunlight was the Royal palace, it's direct translation to human would be "glass" although the building was built from quartz.

Kovac walked with his head held high, for all appearances enjoying the view of the rain wet building gleaming in the sunlight. Kovac looked out of place in the light, bright building, wearing dark military fatigues his booted feet rang loud as he walked down the hallway. Around him walked his guards, soft footed and silent, despite their height and mass being greater than the human's they seemed diminished by him, or perhaps that was only my perception.

They paused before the great door to the hall, Lorastayil suddenly intense as she stared at Kovac.

"Do you want to die human? You seem at great ease."

"No, no I don't, I wish this could have worked out another way." He looked around, "it's beautiful here," he remarked absently, "I don't want to die but none of us choose how we die, even those poor souls who take their own life do so as a symptom of a disease often as not, the only thing you get a choice over is how you face your death. I'll stand on my own two feet and look it in the eye thank you." He gestured to the door, "shall we?"

The Flet Imperium is a culture devoid of much of the trappings of power that other civilisations cultivate. Pomp and ceremony; grandiose displays of power and privilege are not seen in the Flet royal court. In brief order Lorastayil was welcomed back, Kovac introduced and sentenced to death.

Kovac grinned up at the Queen and with a sudden movement had darted past the two large Kitty's that were nominally his guards.

"You know, I have read something of your culture and your laws, something the humans have known for Millenia 'know your enemy' a concept not respected by your finer military minds." Kovac stopped several feet from the throne, his guards closed in but hesitated to restrain him.

"For example, I know that Flet instinct will always be to trust in your claws not your hand held weapons, which puts the two guarding me at a disadvantage, while they are still suppressing the urge to resort to claws, I can instinctively fight with anything, in my reach...ask me about a pineapple sometime." As if to illustrate this point Kovac moved.

He sprang to his left into the nearest guard knocking it off balance, he butted his forehead into the side of its jaw with enough force to cause rotation of the head, the Flet spilled it's weapon and stumbled back. Kovac snatched up the dropped power lance but knowing he lacked the appropriate number of limbs to fire the weapon didn't pause in his movement but instead threw it hard as he could at the second guard who was still fumbling with its own power lance. The Kitty stumbled back and Kovac followed up with a flying knee to it's sternum knocking it flat.

As suddenly as he had moved he was still again, Kovac spread his arms wide as more guards converged on him.

"You see when I say I know you, I know you, so when I say I demand trial by combat, I know you are obliged to meet my demand and decide my fate inside the 'ring' as it were."

The Queen watched Kovac and gave a silent yawn, the Flet equivalent of a smile. "You may think you know us Major, however the demand for trial by combat is only something I'm obliged to honour if you are a subject, and that little display was designed to provoke me, provoke my anger but not all Flet are slaves to their rage." She raised two arms and then with another silent yawn gestured at her guards, "kill him."

Kovac backed up quickly out of the semi-circle of approaching guards, Lorastayil was watching him as more guards entered. Kovac produced a small curved blade, seemingly from nowhere and looked at the Flet heir.

"You know I rather liked the idea of meeting death while standing, but what I think I've always known is I'm going to go out kicking and screaming and fighting all the way." He looked around at the guards who were raising their power lance and I saw his weight shift.

Shots rang out, not the muted pop of a power lance but the sharp crack of human rifles. Several of the Flet guards dropped to the ground, Kovac was already moving towards the nearest Flet when Captain Wolf led the assault on the rear of the guard unit. From my vantage point of multiple awarenesses I saw Captain Becca kneeling just inside the entrance to the hallway and taking aim at the Flet queen. Sergeant Panther flanked by Barbie and Buckets closed in on one of the heirs, rifle shots ringing out everywhere.

Kovac my have been wrong about the precise laws and customs of the Flet but he wasn't wrong about their instincts, caught by surprise many of the Kitty guards dropped their power lances, instinctively wanting to use their own claws when provoked. Those that held onto their weapons were still slow in responding with fire themselves.

Kovac had already attacked the two nearest Flet his karambit knife slashing open throats and major blood vessels as he burst through the circle.

Captain Dorman led his troop in through the side entrance and more shots echoed through the hall. Kovac grabbed Lorastayil and forced her against a wall, the larger being letting the smaller human manhandle her. Their frantic conversation lost to the gun battle.

Moments later the hall fell silent, as the last Flet fell, two humans were down but both were moving, Petra and Angie moved between them and Sergeant Webb organised a stretcher team. Captain Becca began shouting orders and Sergeant Panther led the soldiers of 2 Troop out of the great hall.

Wolf reached Kovac and looked down at the dead Lorastayil, "She declined my offer of peace," Kovac said with regret in his voice. Looking up at his captain Kovac gestured around, "I thought you understood my reasons for not doing something like this?"

Wolf pulled Kovac across the hall his men closing in around them, "Oh I did, but the idea that a man was willing to lay down his life for the protection of his soldiers, well I have this feeling that sort of man is the sort I'd like to keep alive."

In the distance explosions boomed out as Captain Gillespie's mortar unit laid down sporadic fire across the military barracks.

"Your men were in agreement when I told them what you planned, apart from Staff King, he says he's saved you enough recently and stayed behind."

They hurried onto the extraction ship and as Captain Dorman counted his men back on Kovac looked around at his soldiers, his expression unreadable.

Captain Becca approached him and the ship went silent as she reached him and then punched him in the face.

"You bastard! She screamed, I nearly lost you and the first thing you did in response was try and get yourself killed!?" She drew back her fist again but Wolf and Panther restrained her, men laughed and Kovac pinching his bleeding nose approached his officers.

The time for awkward thank yous was later, they were still in Flet space now.

"The Frell sent us pass codes they...happened to have," Dorman said to Kovac's unasked question. "Once we were inside their airspace they have almost no security."

"Major have we started another war? What will happen next?" Gillespie asked, loud enough for the soldiers to listen in.

"Maybe, but I don't think so, I think the political powers will enjoy the loss of a faction from their halls of power and I think that whoever finally claims the empty royal throne, they'll be slightly grateful to us for getting them there and if not...they'll think long and hard before they decide to fuck with the Dark Horses again."

The End.

[type2diabts]

Pairing : Jay × Reader

Genre: fluff

Warnings: None

Word Count : 2,165

Written by: https://suga-kookie-s.tumblr.com/

   It was a Monday, a boring, stupid Monday. You hated the day of the week and everything about them! You open your locker with a roll of your shoulders and a sigh. And a note slipped out. You smiled immediately, the lined paper was folded a few times and had been stuffed through the slats of the metal. Your smile widens as you crouch down and pick up the note.

   Every.

   Monday.

   You open the note and read over it with the smile still on your face:

_You better call life alert because I've fallen for you and I can't get up._

    You snorted, the notes were always filled with cheesy pickup lines- they never failed to brighten your Monday. And of course as always, no signature or way of knowing who was the sender of the little note. You stood up while stuffing the note in your always at hand notebook, it was filled with all the other notes from the previous Mondays. You sigh and smile a little as you slam your locker shut behind you. You glance over and meet eyes briefly with Jay. You snapped your attention away because, yes, even though you thought it was a little ridiculous for yourself to consider someone a "bad boy" what else was there to call him? You hadn't ever talked to him, he was someone everyone considered reckless, wild- a rantipole. The few friends you had here in the new school never wanted anything to do with him. One of the girls even warned you against him. She'd said: "stay away from him. He's bad news."

   When you asked her why she barely had an excuse. Your friends would shrug and say "he always gets into trouble."

   So you'd taken their advice, although you had somewhat of a fascination with him. You'd seen him get in only a few brawls since you'd been here. Whereas more often you had seen him create uprisings and arguments during class- taking a small disagreement and turning it into something bigger. It was almost like he playing a game. Seeing how many people he could get on his side before he showed how truly the subject even mattered to him.

    At one point you'd seen him laugh after getting the whole History class into an argument about one of the smallest of things and he'd said to them, "Well- don't _you_ feel like fools?" The whole classroom went from yelling to silence in seconds, "Getting into arguments about something so petty and because _I_ simply told you to- tsk tsk." He planted his hands on his hips with a grin, happy the attention was all on him, "You see... I don't even care about the subject, and today you learned that-"

    He was about to keep ranting before the teacher screamed at him to get down. And then of course... he was kicked back to detention. What he created was almost like... small rebellions. Never anything dangerous. The only time you personally had seen him get in fights is when someone tried to overstep their boundaries- when they tried to see _just_ how far they could push him. And that's when things got ugly...

   You glanced at him again to see him still staring as he slammed his locker shut. As he walked past you caught him smirking at your timidness, which in effect made you a little embarrassed. You waited until he passed before letting out a small sigh. 

   You gasp, when expectedly you were yanked forward and then slammed back into your locker causing you to cough. You looked up at a tall boy with wide eyes. You recognize him immediately too. _Mason_- one of the biggest bullies in this entire school. He picked on anyone and for no reason.

    Mason growled, "you need to learn to stay out of my way." He yanked the backpack off of your shoulder and tipped it upside down so that most of your books and pens fell out. Before he dropped the bag altogether.

   You gapped at the bag and scoffed, " _Excuse me_ ? I wasn't in _anyone's_ way- YOU need to back off." You rolled your eyes, your sass coming out as an automatic response.

   The boy laughed, "got a mouth on you, don't-" he was cut off when he was yanked away by the back of his shirt. You gasped and looked over at whoever had separated the two of you. And you are even more confused when you see Jay- the intimidating school ruffian.

    You stared at him as you saw him lean closer to Mason and growl, "You _stay away_ from her."

   Mason laughed, a sparkle in his eyes from the challenge that Jay presented, "or what?" Mason persists.

    Jay snickered a little, "Or you regret it. Just like anyone else who messes with me does." He smirked an expression that said, _duh you've seen the fights._ You'd seen those fights too. Anyone who got in a quarrel with Jay never came out on the good end of things.

    Mason yanked away from him, "whatever." He mumbled as he slammed into Jay's shoulder on the way of pushing past him.

   Jay only scoffed while grabbing Mason's arm with a death grip, "I heavily advise against doing that-" he said glancing at his own shoulder, "-again."

   Mason stared at him for a second, you think he was processing his next move. Did he want to get in a fight with Jay? He did he want to take his advice and leave it? But finally Mason pulled his arm away while slipping around Jay and leaving quickly. You looked around at the ring of people who had emerged to watch the fuss. Jay watched him leave with an amused look before crouching down and shoving your stuff carelessly back into the bag before standing back up.

   You stepped forward to him, "Hi-" you said awkwardly and he turned his attention to you with the same amused look, like he was surprised you could actually speak, and you continued, "Um... Thank you for-" you were cut off when he pushed the bag into your hands and walked away. You watched him, shocked, as he slipped around you light on his feet not bothering to say anything. The people moved out of his way instantly as he walked down the hall. You let out a soft puff of air and twisted your lips. Not knowing exactly how to feel about... _anything_ that just happened.

   You took in a breath and looked down at the sloppily put together bag in your arms. You didn't understand why Jay had helped you, and you looked at where he had left in the crowd with curiosity. You released a long breath before zipping your backpack up and slinging it back on your shoulder.

   You started towards your next class, knowing it would start any minute now. And by the time you left your locker all the people that had gathered to watch the commotion had disbanded and gone to class. You walked down the halls as the last bits of people scattered into their classrooms, and you did the same.

   Staring at your shoes you rushed in and sat down quickly, you began to unload the books for this class from your backpack and soon after your teacher began talking. You could hardly pay any attention to the speech your teacher was giving. Your mind was still more than curious about the boy who'd helped you, yet- you knew nothing about. You opened up your notebook and the little note from this morning slipped out and onto your desk. That caused a new thought to come into your head. Who was sending them?

   You opened the small thing and read over it again- causing you to smile.

   "Miss y/n?" You snapped your attention up to your teacher, "I would like your head _in_ this class, not in the clouds please."

   You smile, "Yes sir, I'm sorry!"

   He sighed exasperatingly and went back to whatever he was talking about. You still couldn't pay attention- you did try of course! ...for 30 seconds. Until your mind was somewhere else again.

   You glance to your left and freeze when you see Jay. Never before having realized he sits _right_ next to you in this class. And there you went- your mind looping back into confusion and curiosity with the boy sitting next to you.

   He glances at you quickly and you snap your attention away. You heard him sigh softly as he went back to whatever he was doodling on his page. He had written little things here and there, along with small doodles scattered about. You smiled a little at the doodles, you never would have guessed he'd be the doodling type. And you wondered what else about this boy you didn't know- what was he like under the intimidating stares, snarky remarks and rebellious acts?

    You tilt your head to the side when you see something more than familiar on his little page of doodles. It was the same cheesy little pick-up line that was written on the note in your hands. You gasp, not realizing it was out loud until Jay snapped his attention to you and your teacher stopped in his speech.

    " _Y/n_" your teacher's annoyed voice met your ears and you jumped a little.

    "Yes, sir." You said directing your attention back to the teacher.

    And he continued to give you a short lecture about paying attention and this was "your final warning". You agreed, but of course, once again you weren't listening. Which was funny because normally you paid good attention in class. But today your mind was spinning with questions, and you let it spin because, to be frank, you didn't feel like listening today. Especially now. Your mind spun in loops, excited about this new discovery.

    You watched the hands on the clock closely- willing time to go faster. And now of course of all times it felt as if it was moving in slow motion. But, as soon as you heard the bell ring you jumped and looked at Jay.

    He didn't look in your direction, he only began putting his books in his backpack. You pushed yourself out of your seat and placed the note from this morning on his desk in front of him, "You are the one putting these in my locker." You said matter-of-factly.

   He raised an eyebrow and looked at you, no emotion evident on his face before out of nowhere he laughed a little, "Okay- Detective. What if I am?"

   You knit your eyebrows, not expecting the response you got from him. You'd thought you would need to draw the confession from him and you hadn't expected you would get it so easily, "oh... Well- I don't..." You sigh and twist you lips squinting at him before you smiled a little, "Well then- I enjoy receiving your notes. They make me laugh."

    He smirks a little and leans back in his chair glancing around at the classmates slowly filing out of the room, "I know. I brighten up your Mondays, and in effect, you brighten up mine. Two birds. One stone." He directed his attention back to you as he stood up and your eyes followed him as he was still looking to you, he poked you in the cheek softly and said, "you have a cute smile."

   You were surprised at how warm your cheeks were now, and at the flutter you felt in your stomach, and you laughed awkwardly. Not sure what else to do. You hit a mental wall- unsure, again, of what was happening.

   "Now. Should we get something to eat? or-" he looks at you, the smirk widening as he raises an eyebrow, "do you not go out with, what your friends refer to as, _bad boys_?" He said, making little quotations with his fingers at the words "bad boy".

    You raised an eyebrow, a little confused at who you were seeing now. He was completely different then what you'd seen in the hallways, "So- to get this straight you are asking me out?" You said a little perplexed at the whole situation.

    His smirk widened and he nodded, "Yes I am."

    You laughed a little, "Well." You looked at him, your curiously about him growing and you laughed a little, "in that case then sure. Maybe we should go get some food."

    He smiled, the same mischievous sparkle in his eyes, "good." He placed the little note from this morning back into your hands gently along with another note as he slipped around you.

    You smile and open the second note, giving you a time and location that was labeled "FOOD" in all caps. You laughed a little while slinging your bag over your shoulder. You were finallygoing out with what everyone considered reckless, wild- a rantipole. You couldn't help the cheeky grin on your face at that thought.