#like i don't mind romance and sex in my art
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i eat up a lot of asian gay content, and some of it is amazing, most of it is whatever, and i realise i mostly do it bc it has queer people in it. but i wish it had some meat on the bones if you know what i mean
#there are some very nice shows out there!!#but c-novels are my favourite for a reason#bc they're not *romance* novels#i can see why romance shows appeal to peoppe#but i could not care less about that y'know#anyways#bumi bumble#it would be nice if more queer cinematography wasn't necessarily romance-orientef#that'd really suit my aroace soul#like i don't mind romance and sex in my art#it's all cool#hope more of it has stuff besides it tho#this is why books > shows i'm sorry#also also#if only i read comics#ik there's a lot of queer comics#both eastern and western#but i just never got into that#i can read them just fine and enjoy them#i just don't feel driven to read them most of the time#sometimes i watch those damn romance shows and i get snapped back to reality by a character i am CONVINCED is aro#but they will get a romantic partner in the end anyway#and it feels BAD#okay#like#leave them be#why is this part of your romantic idea#i hate it
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do you have any fic recs?
yes!! so many!! please check the tags for each!
all time favorites:
way down we go: an absolute classic. werewolf harry, chronically ill utterly miserable draco, post-war in small town america. enemies to lovers slowburn with protective harry and hopelessly gay draco.
in hopes that you may drown: SO much of my art is based on this author's harry and draco. such a lovely fic. post-war, draco raising delphi and absolutely perfecting the stressed yoga mom vibe. harry is instantly smitten.
in our blood: about haunted houses, parenthood and growing to care for each other. I love this one.
you'll still find stone: arranged marriage. draco expects the worst and harry is an absolute sweetheart. angst but so heartwarming. (mind the tags!!)
ANYTHING by corvetteclaire! their blood link and in the mirror series are severely underrated and genuinely took my breath away. some of my favorite writing and plots.
inside grey eyes: so so beautiful. quite dark and yet exceptionally hopeful. all about draco's recovery from a nightmare situation and harry's unending support. (mind the tags!!)
anything by tessa crowley!! an absolute gem in the fandom with an impressive variety of works.
the mirror of ecidyrue series: perfection.
in your arms, rests my world: “You make me feel safe, Potter. You keep me safe.” yeah..yeah. (mind the tags!!)
anything by toxik_angel tbh..one of my favorites is infairitance even though it’s incomplete; fairy draco is a game changer
oxytocin: angst, angst, angst, and so much cuddling. slowburn in the best way possible.
Soup-pocalypse and The Great Curry Cataclysm: i read this some time ago but i remember adoring it.
Diffraction Patterns (I Don't Know How to Forget You): another incredible old read .
everything by beloved @rockingrobin69 !! this is one my favorites ever i never stop thinking about it
fluff/humor:
manlet: PLEASE read this one! so so cute and adorable and hilarious ft sweet giant harry and tiny angry draco and wickedly funny narcissa. will definitely open your eyes to small draco.
screw you: extremely funny and extremely hot.
like a star across my sky: SUCH a good fic! feels like a romcom.
title of their sex tape: as funny as it sounds.
flirt: really sweet. disaster flirty draco and awkward yet charmed harry.
married to a brute (ongoing): genius and hilarious
smut:
it beats me black and blue: absolute perfection. no notes.
let me roll it: so delicious. clueless mess draco and grumpy harry who hates everyone except draco.
his little something: size difference excellence
scenes of surrender: a combination of smut, love, recovery and caretaking
a perfect fit: hung harry and size queen draco
come up for air: veela draco
fawning for you: harry is completely obsessed with draco's videos. very cute, muggle setting.
burning the ground: creature fic
ongoing/other faves:
one elephant at a time (ongoing): i recommend this fic to EVERYONE. genuinely incredible. think yellow wallpaper, jane eyre, crush by richard siken, and the author mentions being inspired by my dark vanessa as well. so essentially a modern romance with a dark gothic backstory. every single sentence in this fic stands out to me. every characterization, every conversation, is just so honest and genuine. also!! draco has a cat called lady di!! and he loves to wear earrings! (mind the tags!!)
within the hollow crown: more of pre-drarry tbh. such an interesting plot!! harry grudgingly cares for an increasingly spiraling draco who is except under close and constant watch by the dark lord-every second of his sixth year. currently has an ongoing sequel.
imperfection (ongoing): another fic by robin! and another of my all time favorites, so so lovingly written and so tragic and lovely and heartbreaking. really digs into draco's psych and his manic mindset and constant spiral BUT there is light at the end of the tunnel and so much love surrounding him even though it's hard for him to see it. (mind the tags!!)
saviour series (ongoing): wouldn't necessarily call this drarry? more of a stockholm syndrome gothic novel type of fic but i recommend it all the same. the writing is truly extraordinary and the pacing is incredible. will leave you breathless. part one is complete. (mind the tags!!)
perspective series (ongoing): the original books with alpha harry, omega draco in gryffindor, and an adorable friendship dynamic between the golden trio and draco. really sweet, and super interesting. no romance as of yet but there are little moments.
tales of the potters: very interesting take on the arranged marriage trope! i recommend all of this author's works; they have a gorgeous way with words and their work really brings harry and draco to life.
the veiled boy (ongoing): one of the most intriguing recent fics i've read. really delves into character dynamics in such a realistic and refreshing way and draco is so endearing in it. every chapter has gorgeous illustrations.
never in extremity: reread this one recently. equal parts heartbreaking and heartwarming. (mind the tags!!)
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❝ every side of you ❞ — jjk
— SUMMARY: ❝Jungkook is a devil when he's fucking you and an angel when he's out of bed. You need his aftercare just like you need his tattooed arm choking you so hard.❞
— PAIRING: dom!jungkook x sub!reader
— TYPE: smut, fluff | non-idol!au, established relationship
— WORD COUNT: 1,201
— WARNINGS: PWP, curse words, rough sex, vaginal sex, choking, spanking, squirting, light dom/sub, degradation kink, mention of safeword, creampie, brief loss of consciousness, aftercare, pet names, dirty talk, unprotected sex, tattooed!jungkook
— NOTES: I'm definitely still freaking out over Jungkook's shirtless live on Weverse.
— RELEASE DATE: July 30, 2023
— CROSSPOSTING: ao3
Jungkook is a rough sex lover. You know better than anyone why this man is the biggest stereotype of a character written by an erotic romance author. No matter the time or place. Jungkook only wants his cock to be inside you.
The sound of your moans is like angelic melodies to him. The expression on your face when you reach the orgasm is more beautiful than any Renaissance art he could admire in a museum.
Jungkook loves having sex with you. Every day and every hour that you both could. Definitely.
For those reasons, you weren't surprised when Jungkook woke you up in the middle of the night for a quick fuck.
Or at least that was the initial idea. But just as he was addicted to feeling your pussy squeezing his cock during each thrust by his hips, you were addicted to the genuine pleasure his tattooed arm gave you during choking play.
“You're a whore, aren't you? You love being choked by me. You love when I don't let you breathe." He laughed listening to the sound of his balls hitting the skin of your ass as the speed of his thrusts increased. "Like it? How do you feel you shitty little bitch?
“So good, Kookie… I love it. You're perfect for me."
Your confession might seem adorable sometimes but Jungkook couldn't tolerate softness within sex. When he pressed his forearm to your throat hard enough to nearly hurt you, you muttered a strangled apology, aware that your mistake had pissed him off.
“That's not what I fucking asked." Jungkook slapped your ass with his free hand, the sight of your swaying ass cheeks causing spasms in his body. Holy shit, he really loved fucking you in doggy style. “I'm asking if you like being treated like the stupid bitch you are. You're my cock slut? My needy and dumb slut?
"Yes!" You moaned louder, the emotion of being degraded taking you closer to an overwhelming orgasm. "Please! Please continue! I'm gonna cum!"
"Such a greedy little bitch..." That snarky laugh came back, this time whispered close to your ear. He bit your right earlobe. "Wanna cum on my cock?"
Each thrust was like a walk in paradise. Or maybe a dance with the devil.
Jungkook understood about your body as well as a conductor could conduct an orchestra. It was no different for you. Your knowledge about the whole essence of his body covered in tattoos was something you acquired very well during all those years together.
So you knew why his hand left the soft piece of your ass to squeeze circles on your clit. He was gonna cum at any moment. He wanted you to cum too. You should cum around him, for him, with him.
"Such a fucking good pussy, holy shit!"
It was impossible for Jungkook not to feel numb from the feel of her pussy squeezing him, nearly crushing his cock because of deep thrusts.
It was like he wanted to break you in half. Hips colliding, his tattooed arm suffocating you, deft fingers rubbing your clit so hard and desperately.
You weren't shocked when an intense burning started at the bottom of your belly. It wasn't the first time that this would happen in a fuck with Jeon Jungkook.
However before you could warn him ahead of time, Jungkook was already increasing not only the speed of his fingers but also the pressure exerted on your clit.
There wasn't much you could do but scream when an orgasm flashed through your mind and a sizable amount of clear liquid squirted from your pussy onto the sheets.
You could hear your name escaping Jungkook's lips in a guttural moan and you could also feel all of his cum filling you in dense charges.
Swearing uttered by your boyfriend and the heat of his cum were the last things you were able to witness before your body gave out from exhaustion and you crashed into the wet bed sheets as you lost consciousness.
Jungkook was always a great boyfriend for you, at these times it was like he was written by Jane Austen. Romanticism was one of the characteristics you most admired about him. He was so soft and affectionate when you two was out of the bedroom.
The aftercare was essential for both of you. It didn't matter what he said or did to you in bed, after sex he became the classic "clingy boyfriend", always worried about you, your body and your mind.
"Are you okay babydoll? You scared me." It was the first thing your brain picked up on when you shook off the blackness of the fainting and opened your eyes.
The second thing you picked up was the fact that Jungkook was lying next to you. Both of you still naked and covered by a different sheet than the one on the bed when you have a squirt.
You might also notice that your skin wasn't as sticky as it used to be. Perhaps throwing it on the side table indicated why.
“I'm already fine, Kookie. Just relax." You failed to smile because you hissed in pain as soon as Jungkook's hands tried to pull you into a hug.
The slight discomfort in your body was enough to make Jungkook's overprotective personality worse; wide eyes and a devastated expression on his face.
"I hurt you babydoll? Why didn't you ask me to stop?"
“You didn't hurt me." It wasn't entirely true. Your skin was already lightly bruised, your throat was burning from the choking and your clit was still sensitive and painful due to the strong stimuli of Jungkook's fingers. However you also loved rough sex and therefore insisted on ensuring how satisfied you were after the situation. “It was perfect, angel. I promise. You know I would use the safeword if we had to."
Jungkook agreed as he hoped in his thoughts that this day would never come. He knew he would hate himself for the rest of his life if he ever hurt you.
“You were perfect babydoll. You're always perfect."
Circling your fingers over the patterns on his arm, you allowed yourself to smile at the praise. It was so sweet and kind. A complete opposite of the Jungkook you witnessed in bed.
You loved both sides of him.
"You like when I wet the sheets and my body slumped onto the mattress like a real doll?"
His cheeks turned red and your playful smile widened noticing his embarrassment.
"Shut up." He teased you in light chuckles. "I really got a worried after cumming seeing you fainting underneath me."
"I bet you got horny first." You teased again and this time he laughed louder rolling his eyes and nodding his head in affirmation.
"Fine! It was really a little hot. But I swear I still was worried."
This time you were the one who nodded.
Cuddling the heat of his chest, your eyelids began to close and the post-sex drowsiness expanded in intensity with each passing second.
“I love you my babydoll. You're perfect."
You chuckled and sealed your lips to the bare skin of his shoulder.
“Love you too, Kookie. Every side of you."
#jungkook scenarios#jeon jungkook#jungkook#bts jungkook#jungkook bts#jungkook smut#jungkook fluff#jungkook x female reader#jungkook x reader#jungkook x y/n#jungkook x oc#jungkook x you#bts x female reader#bts x you#bts x reader#bts x y/n#jungkook fanfic#jungkook reaction#jungkook oneshot#jungkook imagine#jungkook ff#bts scenarios#bts reactions#bts reader insert#bts fanfic#bts imagines#jeon jungkook x reader#jeon jungkook smut#jeon jungkook fluff#bts smut
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MDNI 18+
WHISPERED SECRETS Masterlist
Summary: After four years, your sister's ex-boyfriend comes back into your life. Can you keep your entanglement a secret? Will the guilt eat you alive?
Pairing: Sisters Ex Yoongi x Insecure F. Reader.
Genre: SMUT, angst, hurt - comfort, romance.
Warning: Explicit sex, fingering, Possessive Yoongi, swearing, reader is insecure, jealousy, punishment, unprotected sex, drinking, dirty talk, praising, degradation, spanking, spanking as punishment, teasing, hair pulling, arguments. Over use of the name baby. Squirting.
A/N: I just wanted to say thank you to everyone. I was so SCARED to post on here, not really knowing what I was doing. When I hit the post button, I wanted to delete it right away. I didn't expect anyone to read it, and when the first person liked it, I was so ecstatic. I want to thank all the readers, rebloggers, and the ones who messaged me.
SMUT! SMUT! SMUT! SMUT!
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“Yoongs, can you zip my dress,” you yell from the bathroom. You wait, wait, and wait. You can't hear him anywhere in the apartment. “Yoongs?”
“I'm here, sorry,” he says, turning the corner and entering the bathroom and finally helping you do up the zipper. “Look at you. That dress is quite….clingy.”
“You don't like it,” you smirk and look over your shoulder at him.
“Oh, I do,” he said, kissing your shoulder. “Why don't we just stay home tonight. I'll show you just how much I like it.”
“Mr. Min,” you gasp. “You can't miss this event. What will Joon think if his partner isn't there?”
Yoongi did it. He finally gave into Namjoon and has officially become a partner in Persona. His role at the company didn't really change that much. He still wrote, produced, and had his quiet little sanctuary. He just had to wear a suit every now and then for meetings. You couldn't believe it when he said that he was going to buy in and be a co-owner. You asked why he had changed his mind. His answers were always vague. You wondered if he had something up his sleeve.
You, you loved your summer art program and learned so much. It was a lot of work, but it helped you grow as an artist. You were nervous about the art exhibition at the end of your program. Yoongi showed up happily supporting you. Your friends showed up, and your dad showed up with his new girlfriend. She was nice, and you enjoyed getting to know her, and much to your surprise, your mom showed up. You found out your dad had given her an invite. Yoongi didn’t want to leave your side when she showed up and made sure to cling right to you. You told him softly that you needed to be able to talk to her alone. He left reluctantly with Lisa and Jimin, giving you the space that you needed.
You noticed your mom looked brighter and was actually civil to everyone. She had complimented your pieces and asked how your program went. She then apologized to you and said that she was proud of you. She went on to say how she started therapy and needs to learn how to love herself again so she can love you properly like she always should have. She told you how she always had a dream to travel and take pictures when she was young but never had a chance since she married young and then soon after had you and your sister. She's now taking your lead and is going to go for it. You hear your sister is upset about this, now your mom won't be at her beck and call anymore. You unblocked her that night.
Yoongi had asked you if you would now finally apply to go to school full time. You surprised him by saying no. He wanted to argue, but you wouldn't let him. You loved your experience, but you loved him more. WIth his new role and your whole workload, you didn't have much time with him. You loved your job, and you loved your office with the parking lot view that you now shared with Seungkwan. You were happy to just do your drawings for you. You think you might open an Etsy shop or some form of online store and try to sell them one day…but not now. You were happy, and he finally conceded.
“Fine,”Yoongi sighs and kisses you. “Go get a necklace, and I’ll help you put it on.”
You roll your eyes at him and enter your bedroom. You stop dead in your tracks and look at the bed. There was a plate with rolls on it sitting on the end of the bed. You stare at it in confusion.
“What's this?” You ask him.
“Early birthday present,” he calls out from the bathroom.
You take the top roll off the pile and plan on shoving as much of it in your mouth that you can. However, you don't….you can't. Upon taking it, you revealed a black velvet box. One much like your ring currently on your finger came in. You can't move. You feel frozen looking at it. Arms come and wrap around your middle. Yoongi plucks the box from the plate and turns you in his arms, lovingly staring at you. He smirks and strokes the smooth skin of your cheek. Slowly, he drops down onto one knee. It's real, you realize. This is really happening. He pops open the box, and you almost faint as you see what's inside. A huge square cut diamond ring placed beautifully on its cushion. It's huge…huge, you think it's bigger than the one your sister had worn all those months ago. Is this why he finally decided to partner with Namjoon?
“It's been almost a year since I found you again. I never believed in fate but that night when I saw you again. That night changed everything, ” he said softly. You could tell he was nervous by the way his hand shook just a bit. “I don't ever want to lose you again. Will you marry me?”
“Yes,” you say quietly. He slips the ring on your finger, and it's a perfect fit. Throwing your arms around him, the two of you fall to the floor. “I love you, I love you, I love you.”
“I love you too,” he murmurs against your lips. Pulling back, he gives you a questioning stare. “You really didn't know about this?” You shake your head no. “Hmm, Lisa and Jisoo came with me to pick it out. I guess I owe her one for keeping a secret.” You laugh and kiss him again.
Jisoo, Lisa, and Seungkwan all coo over how gorgeous your ring looks on your finger. The diamond sparkles and shines under the lights of the hotel lobby where the four of you gather.
“I can't believe you guys kept this a secret!” You exclaim, looking at them.
“I didn't know,” Seungkwan tells you.
“That's because you have a bigger mouth than me,” Lisa snarks. “I'm going to find Jimin.” Blowing you a kiss, she struts off and leaves Seungkwan pouting.
“I’m going to go find Yoongi. I'm sure he's loving all the conversations forced on him right now,” you tell your other two friends, hugging them goodbye.
Yoongi hates these events. Industry insiders all kiss each other's ass to get something they want. It might be a charity event, but social climbing will come first. It's the worst. Fake smiles, fake laughs. You've had to fake awe and excitement over some big names before, and Yoongi loves you for it. Supposedly…..you're charming. You spot him engaged in a conversation with two unknown men. They were good-looking, of course, and you silently cursed your boyfriend…fiancée for being in this damn industry. When you reach them, you slide your hand up his chest, smiling at his guests.
“Sweetheart,” he says and widens his eyes a bit. You get it….game on. “This is Choi Seungcheol and Yoon Jeonghan. They own Darling Media, and they're looking to partner together for future projects.”
“Oh wow,” you gasp and giggle. “It's so nice to meet you.”
“The pleasure is all ours,” Jeonghan says, taking your hand and kissing the back of it. You giggle again, and it seems to do the trick.
“Yes,” Seungcheol says, clearing his throat. His eyes definitely did a once over, and Yoongi definitely glared a bit. “We found a new, talented artist who we think would be an asset to Persona.”
“Who,” Yooongi asks the handsome man.
“His name is Kai. I believe that he is friends with Jimin. I’m surprised you haven't scooped him up already.” Seungcheol explains. You try not to laugh, and you feel Yoongi stiffen. Out of everyone trying to make it in music, they found Kai. This is the funniest thing you think you may have ever heard.
“The famous model and commercial actor?” You asked with an excited smile on your face.
“Yes, that's the one,” Jeonghan answers. “ We have some great ideas for him, but we would like him attached to the record company first. Then, we can talk…maybe about long-term contracts?”
“Oh, Yoongi, they have such a good eye for talent. Kai is so handsome and talented,” you gush. You feel Yoongi pinch your butt kind of hard. Ow!
“Yes, my love, they indeed do. Why don't you give me a call on Monday?” He ends the conversation by handing them a business card. As they walk away, you wave coyly at them. “You think that's funny?” Yoongi hisses in your ear.
“It's hilarious,” you laugh, and Yoongi takes your hand. He gently pushes you to move forward, and the two of you walk toward the exit of the room. He pulls you down the hallway and into a shallow alcove just tucked on the other side of a statue. Your back hits the wall, and he leans over you. Trapping you in the small space as he places his hands on either side of your head.
“I'm not writing for him. Your boyfriend will have to find another company,” he snarls at you.
“Yes you will,” you say, sliding your hands around the back of his neck. “You will write him a hit song and make him very famous.”
“I’ll write him the worst song I can think of,” he says, bending down and capturing your lips with his. “I'll tank his career.”
His hands are everywhere, and his mouth attaches to your neck. Your head leans back against the upholstered wall. You can feel your hair go staticky Yoongi though, he has no care in the world that you are in public and some important people could catch the two of you. His hands start to creep under your dress, hitching your leg over his hip when someone clears their throat. Whipping around Yoongi hides you behind him. You pull your dress down and pat your hair, trying to smooth the static. You look over his shoulder, and your eyes widen. It's Mingyu…with your sister.
“Sorry,” Mingyu says, blushing. “Umm, I…we were hoping that you would be here Y/N. Your friend Lisa said she saw you come this way.” At least he has the decency to look embarrassed.
“Yeah,...I…i'm…here,” your voice is small, and you think you sound stupid.
“Min Yoongi,” Yoongi says, holding out his hand professionally. Mingyu smiles politely and shakes it. You see Yoongi clench his jaw a little as his eyes fly between Mingyu and your sister.
“Kim Mingyu, it's nice to meet you again,” he says as he introduces himself. Mingyu looks at your sister, and so do you. She looks around at the room, staring at the different paintings on the walls. Basically, she's just trying to keep her eyes off of you and Yoongi. Your eyes sneak a peek at her finger. She still has her engagement ring on.
“What can we do for you?” Yoongi asks stiffly, pulling you into his side. Unconsciously, you let your left hand rest on his chest, and you realize just how tense he was. You see Mingyu nudge your sister, and she sighs.
“The wedding invite we sent you came back,” she said, barely giving you a glance.
“Oh,” you say softly. “Oh, umm, I don't live at my apartment anymore.”
“That's good,” Mingyu says. “It was an honest mistake. We pushed it back to next fall after we had a little…chat.” He gives her another nudge, and she opens her clutch and blindly hands you a wedding invitation.
“We would love it if you could attend,” her voice was robotic, like she practiced that over and over again.
You look at the pretty invite in your hands and then look at Yoongi. He gives you a slight shrug. You know that he will go along with whatever you want to do. Mingyu smiles gently at you. You think that he has good intentions, and honestly, you don't want to ruin this relationship for her. Looking back at her, she's staring hard. Her stare is burning a hole right through the ring on your finger. Mingyu seems to notice as well.
“Oh, what a lovely surprise. When's the special day?” He asks.
“Umm, it just happened today. We really haven't had time to talk about it yet,” you explain. “Thank you for the invitation. It really does mean a lot but…I don't think it's a good idea if I come.” You look at your sister and say her name softly. she looks at you warily. “I'm sorry I couldn't be the sister you wanted but you're my sister and I still love you. Mingyu seems great, and I'm happy for you. I wish you all the best.”
“Thanks,” she whispers. Her eyes look shiny, but she quickly blinks them away, and you wonder if you imagined it.
“Well, it was nice to meet you again,” Yoongi tells Mingyu, shaking his hand again. “We have rounds to make and then home to celebrate.” Yoongi brings your hand to his mouth and kisses it.
“Goodbye,” you tell them and once again walk away with Yoongi's hand wrapped around your own.
The door to the apartment crashes open as you two stumble in lips attached. You almost fall, tripping over your feet. Yoongi is quick to catch you. He pulls his mouth from your own and drops kisses onto your neck.
“Are you sure you want to do this right now?” He asks, worried you might be upset about seeing your sister.
“Please, Yoongi. I want you…more than anything,” you whisper into the dark room.
Reminiscent of that fateful night almost a year ago, Yoongi picks you up, and you wrap yourself around him. Holding on for dear life, as he quickly gets you to the bedroom…your bedroom…the one you share.
Dropping you on the bed, he dives for your neck again as you lie completely back on the bed. You welcome all his kisses and touches that he gives you happily. Wet, open mouth kisses start at your ear and slowly make their way to your chest. Yoongi nips at the exposed skin of your cleavage. His hands take the fabric covering your breasts and tug it down just below your breasts, exposing you to the cool air of the room. You run your fingers through his dark, soft hair and gently pull, earning a groan from his lips. You look at him, and he smirks up at you with a heated gaze. Yoongi sticks his tongue out, and as you watch, he starts to rapidly flick your nipple. You close your eyes and arch your back a little up to him. You are hoping that he will give you more than that.
“Look at me,” he demands softly.
You open your eyes and watch as he takes your peaked nipple between his teeth, giving it a slight tug. You feel that familiar jolt shoot down your body. You try your best to rub your lower half against him to find some sort of friction for relief, but he won't let you have it. He chuckles and moves away just enough that you can't find what you need.
You huff and push him backward. He has to catch himself from falling off the bed, earning a giggle from you. You guide him down to your previous position and straddle his hips. Your hands fly to the buttons on his shirt, undoing them as quickly as you could. Upon finally getting it off, you brace yourself on his chest and press your mouth to his. His hand goes into your hair, holding you to him. Your tongues dance together, breathing each other in. Souls connecting.
Your hips start to move on your own, barely touching the hardness still caged in his pants. Unfortunately, the dress stops you from opening your legs as far as you need to feel him fully, and you let out a frustrated groan. Yoongi's hands fly to your dress and lift it up over your hips, bunching it at your waist. He grabs your waist and presses you down so you can rub against him the way you need.
“You need me that much, huh?” he asked, letting out a breathless chuckle. You nod your head and press kisses to his neck. “I always need you too, baby.”
You sit up on him, trailing your fingers over his exposed chest. Yoongi hands gently rub your legs as he gazes up at you as you smile down at him. You stretch your arm behind you as far as you can to pull the zipper of your dress down. Yoongi reaches up and pulls the front of your dress down completely. Exposing you further to his gaze. Sitting up immediately, he sucks your nipple into his mouth, and his hand massages your other. Your head tilts back as you hold him to your chest. His hands wander around you and travel up and down your naked back before attempting to pull your dress the rest of the way off down your hips. Due to your position, he is unsuccessful in his mission.
“Lie down for me, baby,” he tells you when he pulls away from you.
You bite your bottom lip and do as he asks. You watch Yoongi undo his belt and fling it across the room. You hear it hit something and fall to the floor. His hands make quick work on the rest of his clothes before they tug your dress the rest of the way off. Kissing your calf, he drags his tongue across your leg and up your inner thigh. Lightly, he bites at the sensitive skin, licking the red marks that he leaves behind. Settling down between your open thighs, his fingers toy with the inner hem of your underwear. His dark eyes flicker up to you.
“Tell me what you need, Y/N. I'll give you anything you want,” He slowly moves your underwear to the side, and your eyes never leave his. “The wedding of your dreams.” A slow lick up your dripping pussy. “A home to call our own,” A kiss to your clit. “I'll give you the world if you let me.” His tongue starts drawing lazy circles around you. Your breathing starts to grow heavy and your eyes threaten to close but you don't let them leave him. “What do you want, baby? What do you need?”
“Just you,” you whimper.
Yoongi smiles at you and pulls your panties off. Diving back in between your thighs, his mouth is relentless on you. Tongue flicking back and forth on your clit as his fingers seek entrance into you. Your back arches as he is successful and pumps two fingers in and out of you. Yoongi sucks your clit into his mouth, moaning around you. Your hands fly into his dark hair and hold him to you. You hold the back of his head desperately, trying your damnedest to get him as close as you could. Pulling off you, his fingers still work their magic working your wetness out of you. His mouth attaches to your nipple for a quick second before giving your other breast the same treatment. Grabbing his face you pull him down to your mouth. Lips meeting in a chaotic clash of tongues. A kiss full of want and desire. A kiss of craving. A kiss of pure unadulterated neediness.
“I need you now, Yoongi,” you say quietly against his lips.
He stares at you for a moment while biting his bottom lip. Fingers massaging your innermost spot. Bending down, he kisses your lips once, twice, three more times. Yoongi pulls his fingers out of you, and he reaches down and takes a hold of himself. Tapping the head of his cock against your clit makes your neediness worse. Your hips start squirming trying to get him into you and it only makes him laugh quietly at you.
“You need this, huh?” He asks, sounding just as breathless as you. You nod your head eagerly.
Running the tip along your entrance, coating himself in your wetness, Yoongi starts to slowly roll his hips. Entering you slowly until he is fully inside of you. “I've always thought about you. I had always wondered what happened to you.” His hips start to move at a calm pace. “If you ever found someone who loved you,” you shook your head at him and pulled him down closer to you. He allows you to, and he brings his weight on his forearms. “You didn't ever love anybody else?”
“No, I've loved you since I was seventeen. I've always loved you, ” you tell him honestly.
Yoongi presses a hard kiss against your lips. His hips pick up in pace, fucking you into the matress. You pull away with a gasp, pressing your head back into the pillows. Your hands grab his sides, fingernails slightly digging into his skin. He moans at the feeling and buries his face into your neck. The sound of his hips slapping against our own echo throughout the room, his panting breath in your ear. It feels so overwhelming, loving someone like this, making love like this. Something you could only feel with him.
Yoongi adjusts both of you. He moves to sit on his knees and brings your own to your chest, holding them there. You hear him gasp as he slides in deeper, hitting all the spots that make you see stars. This may not be your favorite position, but the noises he makes are worth it. You'll start stretching every day for those noises. You bring your own arms around the back of your knees, taking over for him. Pulling them back just a little further and closer together.
“Fucking, shit. Do you feel how deep I am?” he moans, leaning back slightly, his thrusts never stopping. The change in angle makes his cock hit your sweet spot over and over again. “Do you need more?” he asks, he sounds like he's struggling himself.
“Yes,” you cry out. Your cries become louder as his fingers rub your clit quickly. The tightening in your stomach winding so tight your body is wanting to get away from it. You feel that familiar heat that starts to take over, your skin getting flushed, heart pounding in your ears. Your core starts to tighten around him.
“There you go,” he hisses. “Let go, baby, let go for me.”
You do. You let go, You finally let go of all the self-consciousness, all the self-doubt. You let go of every insecurity that you have ever felt. There's a high-pitched ringing in your ears. Your body tenses up. You've never felt this pleasure before so deep. So, deep inside of you that you think you might pass out. You feel like you're floating, and you're not coming back down. You think you can hear him reach his end as he swears, but it sounds so far away and muffled. You feel so…high.
“Breathe,” you can hear a voice. “Y/N, baby, breathe,” it's Yoongi. You snap back to reality, spotty vision clears, and your eyes land on him. His dark hair is sweaty and sticking up in all different directions. He looks just as dazed as you feel with his mouth agape. He's breathing hard. He can't look away from you.
“You….came really hard…uh,” he tells you and looks down. You look down as well, and your eyes widen. He is definitely wet as is the bed, and…you don't think it's from him. While it doesn't look like it does in the few adult videos you've seen, you know exactly what happened. Your hand flies to your mouth in shock.
“I'm sorry, that's gross,” you say, turning red. “Eww…I…” Yoongi dives on you, crushing you with a kiss.
“ I can't wait to make you my wife, damn,” he says, going in for more kisses. Pulling you up out of the bed as he flings you over his shoulder. Yoongi gives you a quick slap to your ass laughing. “You better believe that's going to happen more often. Let's shower.”
“Yooonnnngiiiiiii,” you screech happily. Yeah, you finally let go. You're going to give him everything.
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A/N: So, now that we have reached the end, I have an announcement. Thanks to the wonderful Anon who asked about drabbles, I had come up with a few ideas about the future of the characters. As of right now…….I'm about 4 loosely written chapters into a SEQUEL!!! However, I'm not super happy with the way it's going so….I think I will take my time and try to rewrite them.
Secondly, I was writing another story before I started the sequel. I have 6 chapters done on that one. I'm thinking I might drop a teaser to the Whispered sequel next week if I can get on a clear path of how I want it to go. So, everyone….stay tuned.
Tagged Reader:
@marimarvelfan, @unicornbabylover,@minghaosimp, @seoullove96, @iheartsvt, @babyitscoldoutside
#yoongi x reader#yoongi smut#bts fic#bts smut#min yoongi smut#yoongi fanfic#yoongi au#yoongi x you#bts scenarios#bangtan sonyeondan#bts#bangtan#bts min yoongi#bts yoongi#min suga#min yoongi#yoongi#yoongi fluff#suga#suga bts#yoongi scenarios#yoongi imagine
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The sun to me
Chapter XI. Keep.
pairing: hwang hyunjin x afab!reader
word count: 5.7k
chapter summary: a love so great it appears in the reflection of a tear, in the sound of hushed voices and three words exchanged between lovers that bring a deeper meaning to the thread that connects.
warnings: lots of kissing and sweet nicknames(again), multiple sex scenes, oral (f receiving), fingering, unprotected sex (again), choking, creampie, public sex (there's no one there), hyunjin is a bit possessive
~ Masterlist for the series
~ next part
🌹 Rose - true love, romance
The door slams loudly with the wind as Hyunjin's sneakers squeak on the clean wooden floor.
Isaac's head snaps from his newspapers as he looks up and sees the boy who's supposed to be staying at his house, seemingly in a rush as he looks around and scratches his head in thought.
"Oh, look who's here."- Isaac sighs with a warm smile, putting the newspaper down on the table.
Hyunjin lets out a chuckle, running his hand through his hair and smoothing it out a little.
"It's me, I'm here."- Hyunjin wiggles his fingers in a funny manner as Isaac motions for him to come closer.
"At least give me some time of the day and join me for tea."- he says. "Unless you're going to see your darling."
"Well, I was... I was actually gonna look for some paints I wanted to use today at her shop."
"Is she working now?"- Isaac asks and Hyunjin nods.
"Then, join me for a little while."
"Of course."- Hyunjin smiles as he sits down next to Isaac.
"So, tell me, how are things going?"- the older man asks as he pours a cup of tea for Hyunjin.
"Perfect. Almost too perfect. But I have this nagging feeling inside me, because I know at some point, I will have to leave this island and I don't think y/n would leave her garden behind, even for me. Besides, I would never ask that of her, I know how much she put into it and the flower shop. It's like asking her to choose between me and her precious flowers."- Hyunjin quickly shakes his head.
"You said once before you'd like to stay here."- Isaac remembers.
"I did, but I have a gallery to attend to. God knows what Charlie has done with it by now. It was always my dream to open up a gallery of my own and have exhibitions of my art there. To have people come in and admire my work as well as work of other artists whom I admire. It's all I ever dreamed of, a life of art."- Hyunjin talks with a wistful look on his face.
"And what is your dream now?"- Isaac asks and your smiling face, your warm hands, your sweet lips swirl in his mind instantly.
"Y/n. She's my dream."- he smiles and Isaac lets out a quiet chuckle.
"There you have it, the end to your dilemma."- he says and Hyunjin looks up from his cup to him.
"Listen, if two people are in love and willing to work on their relationship, nothing can come in their way and make them fall apart. I believe in both of you. As I came to know you, I realized you're both strong individuals with strong hearts that have endured hardships in their lives. What you need is a little warmness and kindness and if that's all you have for each other then there are no worries! You can conquer the world together so an ocean between you shouldn't mean a thing."
Hyunjin chews on his lip a little as he thinks about Isaac's words, a flicker of hope burning wilder inside him.
"Thank you, Isaac."- he smiles.
"No problem, son."
Hyunjin makes his way to your flower shop with a promise on his lips.
You're tending to your dear flowers, an unwavering smile on your face as you touch their petals and inhale the sweet scent.
Footsteps approach your shop and as they enter, you know it's Hyunjin, you have it engraved in your mind, even the sound of his footsteps ring familiarity in your soul.
"Hey, flower."- his arms wrap around your middle before you can even turn around to see his face.
"Hey, lover."- you melt into him instantly as he holds you tightly, inhaling your sweet shampoo and kissing your neck and shoulder.
"Did you wait for me too long?"- he says as he lets you go so you can turn around to face him.
"No, it's okay. I had to take care of some things around the shop anyways."- you say as you wrap around each other.
Hyunjin forgets to answer when your lips are closer to his and he gives into temptation, closing the gap between you and kissing you until you're breathless.
His hands grip at your waist as you hold the back of his head, fingers tangled in his soft hair.
"The shop is open, by the way."- you mumble as he presses you against the shelf, the flowers above you like a crown for the most beautiful queen.
"Mm?"- Hyunjin smirks, leaning in to kiss your neck.
"Anyone can come in."- you grip his hair a little as he kisses you harder.
"Mm."- he mutters against your skin.
"You'll have me tonight."- you chuckle and he leans back with a pout on his face.
"I want you all the time."- he says cutely.
"You have me, Jinnie."- you gently grab his face, caressing his cheeks with your thumbs.
"Always?"- he asks, something loving flickering in his eyes.
"As long as you want me."- you smile.
"Always it is then."- he gives you a big smile and you kiss him lovingly, unable to contain yourself.
Soon enough, Hyunjin is sat at his easel as you take care of your flowers.
He paints, his hand tireless as he creates yet another vision of you he had in his mind, capturing it on the canvas, to make it last forever, always etched in time.
When you finish with your flowers, you sit down and read your book next to Hyunjin as he paints.
Nothing could ever be better than sharing comfortable silence with a lover you feel safe with.
You feel more and more encouraged every day, Hyunjin's affection lifting you up to the sky and making you feel as if anything is possible.
One look at his smile and you know he feels the same.
Come evening, Hyunjin and you are at your house again, exchanging kisses and stories as the two of you sit on the couch all comfortable after dinner.
"Love, there's something I'd like to do."- he starts, his hand on your cheek, caressing you as you hold each other close.
"What is it?"- you ask.
"I'd like to paint you nude. Would you let me?"- he asks, voice low and a wave of electricity runs through you.
"Of course. I'd like that."- you smile. "Now?"- you add, chuckling.
"If you're comfortable, then yes."- he nods.
"Give me one more kiss and then I'll let you know."- you smirk and he smirks back at you before he leans in and gives you a passionate kiss.
Even the slightest touch drives you insane and makes you burn up for Hyunjin, and when he kisses you so ardently, you can't help but melt into him, arousal already pooling on your panties.
"Was that enough to convince you?"- Hyunjin jokes and you giggle in a haze.
"More than enough."- you say and the two of you decide to go to your room for the painting.
Hyunjin sets up as you slowly strip, feeling a bit self-conscious out of nowhere.
"What is it, my love?"- Hyunjin notices you struggling as you wrap your arms around your naked body to shield yourself.
"I just... feel a bit self-conscious. You can see everything."- you mutter and he gives you an endearing smile as he makes his way to you.
"I've already seen everything."- his hands are on your face as he makes you look at him.
"Yeah, but this is different. You'll have to stare at me as you paint me. And then you'll notice every blemish and-"
"And I will admire it and worship it."- he says as he kisses your forehead.
"Jinnie..."- you pout a little as your heart beats faster and he chuckles.
"You're my goddess, there's nothing I don't admire about you."- he smiles genuinely.
"Okay, if you say so. Sorry for being like this."
"You don't have to apologize for your feelings, darling."- he says as he takes you to the bed.
You smile and kiss his lips, his cheeks and his jawline.
"If you keep doing that, I will toss the painting out and just take you."- he smirks and you giggle as your face heats up.
"Okay, I'll be good."- you tease as you sit on the bed. "So, what position do you want me in?"
Hyunjin bites on his lip, as he lays you down comfortably into the pillow and puts your arms on either sides of your head.
He spreads your legs slowly, one of them falling off the bed to reveal your pussy to him.
You swallow as you look up at him, the tender touch is leaving you shivering and wanting more.
Your hair is splayed around your head like a halo, your lips parted as you look at Hyunjin with eyes full of love.
He almost gives in and lays his body on yours but somehow he comes to his senses, only leaning down to kiss you shortly.
"Beautiful."- he smiles and you chuckle.
Hyunjin sits behind his easel as you make small talk while his eyes travel from your naked body to his canvas.
Silence covers the room like a warm blanket as Hyunjin concentrates and you're melting into the bed, feeling so relaxed and comfortable that you almost fall asleep.
"Love? Are you sleeping?"- Hyunjin chuckles and you jolt.
"No, no, I'm here. I'm present."- you say and he lets out a little giggle before he gets up.
"Maybe I need to wake you up a little."- he states as he sits on the bed.
"Mm. How will you do that?"- you smile at him blissfully as he sits down next you, his hand on your knee.
You gulp as he slowly slides it up, fingertips touching your inner thigh.
His other hand is gentle on your breast before he squeezes it.
"H-Hyunjin."- you whimper as he touches you and plays with your nipple.
"You look so alluring right now."- he looks at you darkly, his fingers coming up to touch your folds, glistening with arousal for him.
Hyunjin touches you gently, getting you to breathe faster and lose your mind slowly as he plays with your clit and nipples.
As you get more and more wet, his fingers slip between your folds as he pushes only the tips in teasingly.
"Ah!"- you moan as he grips your breast.
Just as your eyes close, the stimulation stops and you whine as you look at him.
"Jinnie..."
"Sorry, baby, I have to finish my painting."- he smirks. "But as soon as I'm done I will give you all my attention."- he promises.
"Okay."- you pout a little but let him go back to the canvas so he can continue.
You're now fully aware of the breeze that's coming from the window touching your sensitive nipples, and the arousal dripping between your legs, and the way Hyunjin's eyes are dark and concentrated on you, mapping out every little detail of your body.
You thought you would feel scrutinized but you feel so vunerable in a good way, like you're only his and he loves every little thing about you, it's all for him to admire.
"Jinnie... Are you done soon?"- he can hear the neediness in your voice and he can't deny you the pleasure you crave anymore.
"Just a few more finishing touches but that can wait."- he says as he gets up. "My flower needs me, hm?"- he asks.
"Yes, I need you so much."- you whimper and before your brain can even compute what's going on, Hyunjin is on his knees, pulling you towards the edge of the bed, your pussy right in front of his face.
"Oh."- you let out a gasp and see him smirk.
Always gentle and taking his sweet time with you, Hyunjin surprises you as he dives in immediately, his lips attached to your lower ones as he kisses you, lower lip dragging on your wetness before he finds your clit and sucks on it.
"Ah! Hyunjin!"- you whimper at the onslaught of his lips and tongue making out with you as he holds your legs open, hands pressed in your inner thighs, leaving imprints on your skin.
The greedy, slurping sounds are sinful and arousing only resulting in making you even more wet as Hyunjin drinks from you, his saliva mixing with your sweet juice.
"Oh my god."- you whimper as his tongue works his way inside you and he laps at you like a man starved, and you feel his fingertips pressing on your entrance.
Arching your back off the bed, you whine his name loudly as he pushes his fingers inside your heat to his knuckles, working them together with his tongue.
You let out a broken moan at the stimulation as he gives it his all, sucking on your clit again and pushing his fingers all the way in, filling you up deliciously and finding that special spot inside you that makes you see stars.
You lose yourself in the pleasure, shaking and lifting up to meet his hand, your orgasm washes over you like a tidal wave, as you explode and release on his face and hand.
"Jinnie!"- you moan his name as he kisses you once more.
He hovers over you, his fingertips on your parted lips.
"Open up."- he says and you open your lips, letting him push his fingers in, and you lick at them, cleaning them up and tasting yourself.
The sight of you slightly choking on his bony fingers as you look at him like he's some kind of god makes his legs turn to jelly and his cock twitch in his pants.
"Good girl."- Hyunjin praises you as he pulls his fingers out, leaning down to kiss you sloppily, his tongue deep in your mouth, asserting his dominance.
You gasp for air when he pulls away, grabbing at his arms.
"I need you."- you whine.
"You need more, baby?"- he smirks and you nod.
"Yes, please."- you say quietly.
"Anything you need."
Hyunjin takes off his shirt as you admire his toned physique. He looks at you lustfully, sliding off his pants and boxers.
You lick your lips at the sight of his hard and leaking cock, made just for you to use as you please.
He tugs on his length a few times before coming closer to you.
"I wanna see you on top of me, my goddess."- he says, voice dark and low.
You sit up and give him a lazy smirk.
"Make yourself comfortable, lover."- you whisper, fingertips grazing his neck and collarbone.
Hyunjin sits up in the pillows, his whole body on full display for you as you crawl over to him.
Your legs are on either sides of him and you hover over his cock, your palms planted on his chest.
You slowly rake your fingers down, and he arches into you, his eyes fluttering and he looks at you with hooded eyes.
You can feel every shiver of his body under your touch and you know you have the same effect on him as he does on you.
You grab the base of his cock, running the tip over your folds.
"Please, baby stop teasing me."- Hyunjin whines and you giggle, teasing his length just for a few more moments, before you finally slide down on him, slowly taking his whole length, little moans spilling from your lips.
"Mm, that's it, my flower, take all of me in."- Hyunjin groans as he grips your hips and pushes up into you.
"J-Jinnie."- you cry out as he fills you up perfectly, it's almost too much and you grip his shoulders.
"Take your time."- he whispers, hands running up from your lower back up, then down on your waist, to your ass as he grabs handfuls of it, pulling you on him and making you grind.
You start moving slowly after you adjust and he observes you the whole time, holding your hips, his eyes looking into your soul, then to your parted lips, then down to your breasts, bouncing slightly as you take him gently.
He pulls you into a kiss, and it gets more heated the more kisses you exchange, your mind and body buzzing and screaming for more.
You start fucking on him faster, needing to feel him deep inside you, all of him, and he helps you bounce, meeting your movements with his.
"Hyunjin!"- you moan his name as he hits your spot.
"Ah, my rose, my beautiful rose."- he moans as he fucks up into you, driving you even more feral.
"I need you, I need you deep inside me."- you bounce harder, making the bed creak and Hyunjin grunts loudly as he digs his nails into your hips and lets you use him.
"Take me, my love. Take all you need. Devour me."- he keeps moaning as your hands wrap around his neck, something primal waking up inside you as you drip on his hard cock, using it for your pleasure and Hyunjin looks at you with eyes full of admiration.
You squeeze his neck a little, making him whimper as he grips your hips even harder, probably leaving bruises there as evidence of the passion shared between you.
"I- I can't hold it much longer, flower. I'm gonna cum."- Hyunjin whines.
"Cum inside me, lover."- you say and he gasps a little, hands on your ass, gripping it again.
"A-are you sure?"- he looks at you sweetly, with puppy eyes and his lips jutting out.
"Yes, I want you to fill me up, Jinnie. Make me yours forever."- you moan, your nails digging into his shoulders.
"Fuck, okay I'll make you mine forever."- he groans and fucks up harder into you.
Your vision blurs as you scream, throwing your head back and cumming all over his cock, his name on your tongue.
Hyunjin explodes inside of you before he can even control it, the feeling of his warm cum filling you up makes your eyes roll back in your head.
He grabs onto your breasts as you keep moving your hips on him, overstimulating him.
"Mm, y/n, my muse."- he whines and his lips attach to your nipple, sucking on the sensitive bud as you tangle your hands in his hair, gripping it a little, his cock slowly going limp inside you.
His arms wrap around you as he lays his cheek on your breast and you wrap your arms around him, caressing his head gently, running your fingers through his hair dampened with sweat.
The moment is sweet and quiet as you stick to each other, not wanting to leave the embrace that's full of safety and love.
Suddenly, you feel something wet on your skin and hear Hyunjin sniffle.
"Hyunjin?!"- you panic, grabbing his face and lifting it up to make him look at you.
Your heart breaks when you meet his eyes, big and glassy, hot tears sliding down his cheeks as his lips tremble.
"What's wrong?"- you're still in panic mode as he isn't answering, your thumbs catching his tears.
"I love you."- he says like it's been weighing on his soul, like he waited for an eternity just to utter those three words to you and now he has found relief.
A wave of warmness travels through you, hitting your heart with an explosion of love for the man beneath you.
"I love you."- you say sweetly, giddily, gently, like saccharine is dripping from your very lips and Hyunjin's face lights up with a big smile, almost as that of an innocent child, their soul still untouched by everything bad in the world, heart still pure and unbroken.
Hyunjin starts chuckling happily, his plump lips kissing you everywhere they can reach, making you laugh as you hold onto him and endure the loving agression of his kisses.
"I didn't mean to cry."- he shakes his head. "I'm just overwhelmingly happy."
"I know, lover. But, you can cry in front of me if you need to, don't worry about that."- you smile, holding his face in your hands like you're holding the whole world.
"Thank you, y/n, you're so wonderful to me."- Hyunjin almost cries again so he buries his face in your neck and leaves kisses on your damp skin.
"You don't have to thank me."- you smile as you kiss the top of his head.
The same night as your tired limbs tangle together and you find home in each other's arms, hushed voices repeat those three words until you both fall asleep, hearts full and eyes teary.
It's just around 5am when Hyunjin squints his eyes, tilting his head at you as you bring him a cup of coffee.
The morning air in your garden is crisp and welcoming after a warm night under the blankets with Hyunjin's body pressed against yours.
"Good morning, sleepyhead."- you chuckle, pinching his cheek and leaning down to kiss his forehead.
You're about to move away but Hyunjin is quick to grab you and keep you in place, his arms enveloping you as he buries his face in your tummy and whines.
You giggle, your hands on his head instantly, giving him pats and caresses.
He says something into you, sending vibrations through your stomach that tickle you and you laugh.
"What was that?"- you ask and he looks up at you, his chin still leaned on you.
"Why are we up this early?"- he pouts.
"I'm taking you to my last favorite hidden place here."- you smile.
"Oh really? I almost forgot you were my tour guide."- he smiles cheekily as you play with his hair.
"Your tour guide got distracted."- you smirk.
"The distraction was worth it, though."- he says and pulls you down for a kiss before he releases you so you can actually eat breakfast and drink some coffee.
Hyunjin wakes up after that, and the two of you prepare some picnic food and stuff you'll need.
"You're not telling me anything?"- he asks with a cute pout.
"Nuh-uh."- you shake your head and kiss his pouty lips.
"What if I bribe you with kisses?"- he asks and you laugh.
"I'd enjoy your attempts but you'll see it when we get there."
"Give me at least one hint. Cause I really feel like I've seen it all."- Hyunjin whines.
"Okay, we're using a boat. Delmar lent it to us."
"Oh? Who's gonna steer it?"- he asks and you smirk.
"I am."
"I didn't know you could do that."- Hyunjin gasps with a smile.
"Well, now you do."- you say and he shakes his head in disbelief before giving you a sweet kiss.
"Alright, lead the way captain!"- he salutes you and you laugh as the two of you walk out of the house.
You talk quietly on the way to the pier, not wanting to disturb the silence enfolding the sleepy island.
"I'm gonna need a little help."- you say as the two of you arrive to Delmar's boat. "I need you to pull the boat towards the pier."
"Okay, I can do that."- Hyunjin nods quickly, stretching his arms a little and rolling his sleeves up.
He grips the rope and pulls, grunting a little and you bite on your lip as you stare at his arms.
You let out a giggle and he turns to look at you.
"Am I funny?"
"No, you're hot."- you wiggle your eyebrows.
"Oh."- he smirks.
"But you're funny too."- you nod and he pouts at you jokingly.
"Okay hop on, captain, I can't hold this forever."- Hyunjin says and you laugh as you see him struggling a little.
After you're both in and moving, Hyunjin sits close to you as you steer the boat.
"What?"- you yell slightly over the loud sound.
"That's kinda hot."- he says and you laugh, shaking your head.
Both of you enjoy the view after that, and Hyunjin feels excited about where you're taking him.
"We're here."- you say as you slow down and a small island comes into view, even smaller than the one you just left behind.
After you successfully moor the boat and get out, you walk out to the beautiful and almost untouched beach.
"This isn't technically on the island, but it's one of the smaller islands surrounding ours that is uninhabited. There's only a few birds and insects here and of course plants."- you chuckle.
"So I thought I'd show you a place I discovered on my own, per se."
"We're completely alone here?"- Hyunjin chuckles and you nod.
"That's it then. This is Hyunjin and y/n's island. No one set foot here or they will be destroyed!"- he says, pointing at the sea with his brows furrowed and lips pursed.
You burst into laughter, smacking his arm in the process.
"Okay king Hyunjin, let's go find a nice spot to sit down and watch the sunrise."- you snicker, linking your arms together.
"Yes, my queen."- he smirks and kisses you as the two of you walk on the beach.
After you find the spot, you take out the blanket and Hyunjin snaps a few photos of the island.
"We could take a walk later?"- he asks and you nod.
"Mhm. After the sun is fully up. There's lots of woods here and I don't wanna get lost in the darkness. I mean, it's always darker amongst the trees."- you say as the two of you sit down.
"Okay, I don't wanna get lost in the woods either. Are you sure there isn't a serial killer hidden somewhere around here?"- Hyunjin adds and you laugh.
"Baby, this isn't a horror story."- you say.
"What kinda story is it?"- he smirks, scooting closer to you and wrapping his arms around you.
"A love story."- you answer.
"I like those kinds of stories the most."- he smiles and kisses you.
"Mhm. Me too."- you mumble against his lips. "Are we watching the sunrise?"- you snicker as he keeps kissing you.
"We are."- he chuckles and pats the space between his legs. "Come here, darling."
You sit between his legs and lean your back on his chest, your head on his shoulder as he wraps his arms around you, and you lay yours on his and play with his fingers, tracing patterns on his skin, fingertips touching the soft hairs on his arm.
He kisses your cheek and jawline gently, holding you tighter.
You watch as the sun rises, bathing the sea and your faces in a golden hue. Hyunjin closes his eyes for a moment, his mind turns the scene into a lovely painting, that the two of you belong in, one that people would admire and wish they'd had a love like you do.
You spend some time in that warm embrace before you move away as the sun moves higher in the sky and you take out some food and coffee.
Sketching together became one of your favorite activities to share and you try to sketch Hyunjin only to end up frustrated because nothing can capture his beauty.
He notices you frowning and huffing to yourself, so he looks up from his sketch of the beach.
"What's wrong, my muse?"- he asks.
"I'm trying to sketch you but you're too beautiful for my poor skills of sketching faces."- you say annoyingly and Hyunjin can't help but laugh.
"You are way more beautiful than me, my sweet flower. My paintbrush could never capture the perfection of you."- his hand cups your cheek and you lean into his touch.
"Sweet talker."- you smirk and he giggles.
"You love that."- he wiggles his eyebrows and you know he's right.
"I love you."- you say making his heart dance again.
"I love you."- he says it sweetly, moving closer to prove it with his kisses.
Your sketchbooks lay forgotten on the side as the two of you lose yourselves in each other, hands roaming everywhere, bodies craving to get closer and closer, lips stuck to one another's.
Hyunjin pulls you into his lap and you feel him under your wet core.
"H-Hyun-" - you whimper as he pushes his hips up into you.
"There's no one here."- he says, his lips relentless on your sensitive neck.
"I know, but-"
"I need you."- Hyunjin whimpers desperately as his hands grip you.
"I need you too."- you cup his face and kiss him passionately.
He slides your dress down to reveal your breasts, kissing them, licking and sucking on your sweet nipples as his hand travels between your legs.
You lift up a little to let him touch you as you throw your head back and moan quietly.
Hyunjin moves your panties to the side, fingers on your wet folds and pressed in to your clit, his movements driving you insane as you grind on his fingers.
As he leans back to look at you, eyes dark and hazy, your hands travel to his pants and you pull them down with his boxers just enough to reveal his hard cock.
You wrap your hand around him, thumbing his slit and playing with the pre-cum, smearing it on his head and down his twitching length.
"Mm, baby."- Hyunjin moans, biting on his lip as he leans on his hands.
You're so desperate to feel him inside you that you can't wait anymore so you lower yourself on him.
"Ah, y/n! So warm and tight."- he whimpers as you clench around him.
"Jinnie... My Jinnie."- you moan, arms wrapping around him, clinging to him as your emotions start wilding inside you, your body and heart burning up only for Hyunjin.
"Yours, only yours."- he holds onto you equally as desperately as you fuck into each other slowly.
You both lose yourselves in the moment, desperate for each other and Hyunjin is going crazy, every single movement brings him immense pleasure.
All the times he wanted to love, but found it hard to do so, with you it was so easy, it was easy to love you and every cell in his being screams your name as he flips you over, making you squeal in surprise.
"J-Jinnie!"
"I can't hold back, my love."- he pushes his cock back inside you and you take it, fitting him so perfectly inside your warmness, shaping around him and making it a home for him, forever only his.
"Don't hold back. Fuck me. Fuck me, Hyunjin."- you burn with desire and his eyes roll back.
"Ah, when you talk like that..."- he growls as he brings your knees up to your shoulders.
He starts pounding into you hard, harder than ever before as brings his whole weight down onto you, his cock hitting the deepest spot inside you where no one else has ever been before.
"Ah, fuck, Hyunjin, ah-" you moan and babble as you grip onto the blanket under you.
"You're mine, flower. Only mine."- he growls as he grabs your breasts, squeezing them and fucking you even harder.
You can't even form a sentence anymore as he fucks you senseless, the only word on your lips is his name.
"I'm gonna worship this pussy forever. It was made for me, made to take my cock."- he says and you whimper loudly.
"H-Hyunjin!"- you moan as you cum around his length, driving him even more insane when you clench around him so wetly and perfectly.
"Shit!"- he groans and pulls out, giving a few tugs to his wet cock and cumming on your breasts and dress.
Hyunjin takes in the erotic sight of you as you come down.
Your legs relax as you breathe hard, eyes filled with tears of pleasure.
Hyunjin catches his breath and his arms are around you instantly.
"Are you okay, my flower? Was I too harsh?"- he asks with concern on his face and you quickly shake your head.
"No, you were perfect."- you say with a smile.
"Yeah? So you liked it rough?"- he smirks and you smack his arm.
"Shut up."- heat rises to your cheeks as you try to hide from his cheeky smile.
"Aw, don't be shy now."- he says as he gently grabs your arms. "You can share what you like with me, I wanna fulfill all your desires, y/n."- he adds, kissing your cheeks.
"Mm. I wanna fulfill all your desires too."- you say.
"You already do."- he smiles and kisses you gently.
"I'm sorry I ruined your pretty dress."- Hyunjin adds when you part.
"It's okay, I can wash it."- you chuckle as he helps you clean up.
After the two of you are clean and dressed, Hyunjin leans on your chest and holds you tightly.
"Play with my hair!"- he whines and you chuckle at him and start running your fingers through his hair.
You enjoy the sweet moment before you decide to get up and round the island, as you walk and hold hands, the beautiful nature around you inspiring your souls and Hyunjin captures you surrounded by it's beauty on his camera.
You come back to the beach and sit once more to eat.
And you finish first, your eyes glued on Hyunjin's pretty frame.
You can't believe this man is yours.
Your hands can't help themselves as you reach out towards him and start caressing his cheek with your knuckles.
He looks at you with a mouthful of sandwich and you laugh.
"Cute."- you pinch his cheek and he whines.
"Is this a black onyx stone?"- your eyes fall to the necklace adorning his neck.
"I have no idea."- he says and you chuckle. "You like it?"
"Mhm, it looks pretty on you."- you say.
"It's gonna look even prettier on you."- he smiles, wiping his hands on a napkin as he's done eating.
"What?"
"I want you to have it."- he unclasps the necklace.
"You don't have to-"
"No, I want to, really. Please, I'm happy to see you wearing my clothes or jewelry."
"Okay."- you smile and lift your hair up so he can put the necklace on you.
"There. Beautiful. What's mine is yours, my flower."- he smiles at you sweetly.
"Likewise."- you smile back.
As you make your way back to the island, bathed in the sun and full of happiness, Hyunjin knows he'll soon have to tell you and burst the bubble the two of you fell into.
He'll have to tell you that he's leaving.
Taglist: @moonchild9350 @janepg @velvetmoonlght @hwanghyunjinismybae @jehhskz @laylasbunbunny @porangporangmeong @jeonginslefthand @sapphirewaves @simpforleeknaur @laughatdanger @lixies-favorite-cookie @linavc @quokkacidal @thisaintredwine @m00gyu @yaorzu-blog @skzfelixlove @tajannah-price1 @puccaaak @aft2rsexs @xxkissesforchanniexx @aprilmaejune77 @lilmeowneow @stayjinnie @astrobebba @danihwang882 @kaysungshine @nchhuhi @1810cl @chartrucewhore @babigriin @jisuperboard @alisonyus @minluvly @instantsoulnight @kkamismom12 @its-stayville-forever @s3ungm1nxxl0ve @painterhyunjin @lemonadeboun
#stray kids x reader#stray kids#stray kids smut#skz smut#skz x reader#skz fluff#stray kids fluff#hyunjin x reader#hyunjin smut#hyunjin fluff#hwang hyunjin smut#hwang hyunjin fluff#hwang hyunjin x y/n#hwang hyunjin x you#hwang hyunjin x reader#hyunjin x y/n#hyunjin x you#hyunjin scenarios#hyunjin imagines#hwang hyunjin#hyunjin series#skz series#the sun to me series
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Lancey or Lancey
Symphony Smut Series Day 5: Lancey Foxx's Lancey or Lancey
Lyric: Took her to Paris, she took her panties off
Pairings: Bf!Felix × fem!reader
Warnings: SMUT MINORS DNI, fingering, p in v sex, overstimulation, lingerie kink, Frottage, implied use of pheromone, dom!felix, sub!reader, protected sex, reader orgasms like 3 times, fluffy at the end (sorta), smut with plot
A/N: sorry for delaying day 5 everyone! I had to release my Christmas headcannons yesterday so I couldn't really post this. But we are back on track! So enjoy my urge for Felix to buy my lingerie, through this stupid oneshot.
THE SYMPHONY SMUT SERIES MASTERLIST
"Felix tell me you're kidding right now."
"Hmm." Your boyfriend put his finger to his temple, pretending to playfully think, "I think.... Nope!"
You could have screamed out loud right there. But instead of damaging your boyfriend's ears, you decided to damage his heart, by filling it with too much love, by hugging him almost to the point of his ribs breaking.
"I love, I love you, and I love you." You kissed every part of his face after every 'i love you'. His freckles, his nose and finally his lips, where you loved to be the most.
"I can't believe we're going to Paris." You slumped back on the bed, not being able to realise that you had Paris tickets clutched in your hands.
"Me neither darling." Felix leaned closer to you, encasing your waist in his arms, his grip sending tingles throughout your body, "Oh and I have a surprise for you."
"Don't tell me you got me lingerie." You rolled your eyes at him playfully, "Lix, for god's sake you already bought me so much crap."
"But this is special, I promise!" Felix scrunched his nose at you, before reaching over and taking out a box from underneath the bed.
"You hid it under my bed for how long exactly?" You raised your brow at his weird hiding spot, "Wait so this is why you were searching for your missing sock under my bed!?"
Felix chuckled, his deep voice pulsating throughout your body like electroshock. "You never clean the underside of your bed, so it became the perfect hiding place."
The box he held in his hands was about the size of a shoebox, completely covered in pink ribbons and lace and whatnot. It was pretty, you had to admit, but you were confused about whether Felix was getting you a box or lingerie.
"Open it princess." Felix nudged the box into your arms, "You'll like it, I promise."
You had often gotten lingerie as gifts from your boyfriend, with all of them almost becoming your daily wear. But he had never gotten you something like this.
"Liz is this-" "A lingerie dress? Yes princess, yes it is."
You stared at felix in awe, before snapping your head back to the white cloth in the box. It was pretty, made up of, what you assumed was white silk, with lace ribbons decorating the neckline perfectly.
"But, but, but, this isn't the surprise."
You looked up at Felix with confusion clouding your eyes, which made him chukle at how adorable you were.
"So the surprise is-" Felix said, in a hyperbole voice, "I get to fuck you in these in Paris."
"That's the surprise?" You scoffed, at how underwhelming it was, "We could fuck-"
"And you get no sex until we get to Paris and you're in this beautiful piece of art."
It was as if you got a slap to your face when you heard Felix's words echo through your mind.
"Lee Felix Yongbok." You glared at him, "Tell me you're joking."
"Nope." Felix leaned back against the bedframe, his shirt riding up slightly to reveal his abs, "Let's just say this is payback for making me love no nut November on purpose."
"So what is this then? Death by No Dick December?" You glared at him, as he sealed you tighter in his arms.
"Impatient aren't you?" Felix mumbled into your ear, rubbing his hand against your leggings, "Patience is a good virtue darling."
"Not when your dick is literally rubbing against my pussy."
A week passed and you were finally in the land of romance and love and roses and croissants.
A week with none of your favourite food in your mouth or in your pussy. Felix enjoyed it, the way you were basically on your knees for him, but you weren't a sore loser, so you kept the game up, with the help of your trusty vibrator.
But now, it was the real game.
After you enjoyed some nice croissants by a quaint cafe and petted a lot of stray cats, you headed back to your hotel, side-eyeing Felix all along the way who had not a clue about all the breakdowns you were about to have. Your cunt was itching to the point of destruction, and his dick was the only way of peace.
"Well aren't you gorgeous now?"
The room was more dimly lit than it was when you had entered it, the smell of lavender intoxicating you, courtesy to Felix's new perfume.
"Come 'ere." Felix opened his arms, as you silently walked towards him, the chill breeze from the open window giving you goosebumps. The material of the lingerie was thinner than you had anticipated, basically transparent, but then you reminded yourself that this was what Felix liked the most. And if you obeyed properly like his good princess, he would give you the medicine to your poor cunt.
"Fuck you're like a goddess." Felix's hands traced over your barely clothes thighs, leaving marks with his mouth on your collarbone, making you whimper.
"What do you want princess?" Felix chuckled. Teasing you was always fun, "My cock hmm? Use your big girl words now, come on. We don't wanna disappoint the city of love do we?"
"Ah fuck Lix!" Your voice vibrated off of the walls as felix squeezed the inner walls of your thigh, the desperation of him had been so high that even a tiny squeeze was already getting you wet, "Need your cock please!"
"Good girl."
He chuckles at how needy you sound, but at the same time, your voice has blood rushing to his cock while his head swirls with desire. He shifts his own hips, subtly pressing his erection against your ass. His eyes flutter at the minute pleasure. He grows more bold, and his hand rubs your hip before coasting up your side to your chest, giving your breast a gentle squeeze.
You whimper louder and squirm. He squeezes again softly while lowering his head to your neck to lay some tender kisses on the side of your throat. His palm leaves your tits and smooths down over your tummy in the direction of your panties.
Cautiously, he maneuvers his hand past the waistband and dips into your cunt. He cups your pussy, feeling the heat radiating off the area. A single finger slides between your folds in almost an exploratory touch. He feels your slick all over his digit.
He begins to use another finger, sliding the two up and down through your wetness. You roll onto your back, your breasts rising and falling as your breath gets heavier. Your thighs spread a little as if you subconsciously sensed his presence between your legs.
“I’m right here, sweetheart. I’ve got you,” he murmurs, his voice huskier with arousal this time around.
You cry out as his fingers brush against those same spots that brought you to the finish last time. Your hips twitch, and you grip his thighs as your peak rises within you. Moments later your cumming all over his fingers, sucking in a harsh breath as a second release courses through you, even more intense then the last.
His free arm keeps you secure against his chest while rubbing your side soothingly. The heel of his other palm roughly massages your clit as his fingers pump in and out.
As soon as you seem to be coming down, Felix lifts you up again, tugging your clothes off and moving your body around like a doll to get you in the position he wants. You were definitely more pliant after two orgasms, but you could also see how the weeks without pussy had been paying off. He was getting better.
He has you on your back now, thighs against your chest and knees hooked over his arms. Again, he had no patience to tease right now, so after pushing his sweats down to mid thigh, he takes his cock and slides it in you with no hesitation. He groans as your hole takes him in, your walls pulsing around him even after he bottoms out.
Your eyes droop at the stretch. It always felt so satisfying, having him buried balls deep in you. As close as he could possibly be. No fear of him leaving or pain of being separated. You whine and reach up to pull him closer.
“Perfect pussy’s made for me,” he grunts while snapping his hips, “Miss it every second I’m not inside it.”
“Lix” you whine, “Harder. Wanna feel it.”
He moans at your plea but indulges you, grabbing you harder, pressing your legs higher, filling you deeper.
He fucks into you over and over, stoking the flames within himself, trying to build to that explosion. You were so tight, so warm. He hums another low moan and whimpers softly as he feels it right there. He gasps softly before holding you tighter and muttering in your ear.
“Good… good girl,” he moans before his hips buck wildly and he finally releases.
You finish for a third time. You cling to him tight as the euphoria washes over you again. Locking your legs around his hips, you keep your face pressed to the warm skin of his neck as it goes through you. You feel the hot flood of cum he fucks into you. His chest is heaving now too as he recovers from the high.
He stays on top of you for a moment before pulling out. You cling harder upon losing that full feeling. He smiles at your desire to be close to him and gives you one more kiss before sitting up.
"Well-" Felix's deep voiced chuckle vibrates throughout your body, "That was fucking good."
"First of all-" you sleepily say, "Fuck you for depriving me of all that good dick for a week." You glare at him, "Second of all, I want more lingerie like this."
"Whatever you say darling." Felix shrugs his shoulders, supporting you a little straighter against his figure, "You know Paris does have really good lingerie."
Taglist: @ramenoil @mynameisniya150 @demigodmahash + whoever wants to be tagged the list is open!
#felix#lee felix#lee felix yongbok#lee felix smut#skz#stray kids#skz smut imagines#skz smut fics#stray kids smut#stray kids smut drabble#felix smut#lee felix yongbok smut#lee yongbok smut#lee yongbok#felix hard hours#felix hard thoughts#stray kids hard hours#stray kids hard thoughts#skz hard hours#skz hard thoughts#skz felix smut#stray kids felix smut#skz smut drabble#skz smut#stray kids smut imagines#felix smut fics#felix smut drabbles#stray kids felix#skz felix#felix × reader
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In the mood for...
Oct 27th
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1. Hiii, i have a request for the next ITMF: please recommend some lengthy canon divergence fics in which lan xichen gets told off for believing JGY over LWJ. Like the fact that he believed someone from another sect (especially the Jin) over his own brother is called out.
Ofcourse wangxian pairing with a happy ending for them.
Extra plus if it's not jiang cheng friendly or not jgy friendly.
Thank you 🙏
Discarded by teawater (E, 187k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Dying Lan children, Hurt/Comfort, YL WWX, Golden Core Reveal, Case Fic, Depression, Family Issues, Self-Esteem Issues, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Worth Issues, Angst with a Happy Ending, and it’s not always dark, POV Multiple, BAMF WWX, dubious morals in the Lan sect Feels, Pining, Grief, Fix-It, BAMF LWJ) if they don't mind a WIP
A Life Without Regrets by naqaashi (M, 163k, WangXian, JFM & WWX, JC & WWX, WRH & WWX, LXC & LWJ, LQR & LWJ, LWJ & NHS, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Crack Treated Seriously, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Murder Husbands, PTSD, BAMF WWX, Cultivation Sect Politics, Genius WWX, Cultivation Theory, Sentient Burial Mounds, Dysfunctional Family, Grief/Mourning, Angry WWX, No Golden Core Transfer, BAMF LWJ, Angry LWJ, One-Braincell WangXian, Idiots in Love, Requited Love, Requited Unrequited Love, Soft WangXian, Married WangXian, Soulmates, Not Cultivation World Friendly, Immortal WWX, Canon-Typical Violence, Not JC Friendly, Not Yunmeng Jiang friendly, not gusu lan friendly, Immortal LWJ) its not the Main Focus, but LX issues gets adressed
Twelve Moons and a Fortnight by stiltonbasket (M, 290k, WangXian, Humor, Slow Burn, Post-Canon Fix-It, Long-Distance Relationship, Epistolary, Love Letters, Family Feels, a-qing lives, teenage romance, Adoption, Romantic Comedy, Happy Ending, Weddings, Case Fic, Parenthood, Politics) link in #8 there's an epic scene where lxc calls himself (and the more toxic Lan rules) out, and dedicates himself to being a more proactive sect leader, set after canon.
Arrayed by FirefliesNLightningBugs (M, 5k, wangxian, angst w/ happy ending, LSZ found by LXC, LSZ keeps his memories, alive JYL & JZX, canon temporary character death, WIP) shows lxc slowly realizing that he did this and that was stupid from his pov, set post 1st siege of bm.
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2. Hello! IMTF fics that deal with self-discovery. Whether it be coming to terms with being queer or gender stuff or kink. Just grappling with identities and the social tumult that comes along with navigating them, purity culture, cisheteronormativity, etc. Just smth along those lines.
Thank you!!
KILF (Knits I’d Like To Fuck in) by ScarlettStorm (E, 168k, WangXian, Modern, Established Relationship, Porn, like in the writing and also as a plot point, onlyfans au, sex worker WWX, Fashionista LWJ, in this house we support sex workers, Fluff and Smut, they're horny and in love, mental health, therapy is good actually, Domestic Bliss, tender kink, Fiber Arts, autistic LWJ, neurodivergent WWX, switch rights, Nonbinary NHS, a soupçon of gender, get in losers we're introspecting about queerness, Genderfluid Character, Gender Exploration, perhaps slightly more than a soupçon of gender, Hurt/Comfort, past trauma, But They're Working Through It, aggressive mutual caretaking)
reports of my heterosexuality may have been exaggerated by sysrae (E, 8k, wangxian, modern, college/university au, getting together, straight boy LWJ, disaster gay WWX, heteronormativity, hockey player WWX, little angst)
Pride and Prejudice by sami (T, 3k, WangXian, Pride, Parades, Cats)
❤️ save a sword, ride a socialist by sysrae (E, 33k, wangxian, modern w magic, college/university au, fake/pretend relationship, single parent WWX, homophobia, light angst w/ happy ending, idiots to lovers, fluff)
without your new eyes by anaphoricae (E, 66k, WangXian, Modern, Didn’t Know They Were Dating, Sexuality Discovery, Self-Discovery, Literal Sleeping Together, (there is so much sleeping in this fic), mentions of WWX/others and LWJ/others, Drunk LWJ, Teacher LWJ, WWX is a… throws dart… computer scientist, No Angst, Jealous WWX, Flirty WWX, Eventual Smut, Bottom LWJ, Fluff, Non-Sexual Intimacy, WWX’s Love Language is Physical Touch, [Podfic] without your new eyes by anaphoricae by LadyEn)
this body is a gift for you by loosingletters (T, 1k, MXY & WWX, Trans Female WWX, Trans MXY, Canon Divergence, Gender Identity, Self-Discovery, Gender Roles)
The Sculptor by Eleanor_Fenyx (M, 27k, wangxian, LQY/WQ, LWJ & WQ, SL/XXC, modern, lavender marriage, period typical attituted and terminology, mute SL, queer themes, queer families, slow burn, getting together, intimacy, artist WWX, professor LWJ) autumn flower by ScarlettStorm (E, 78k, WIP, WangXian, Modern AU, no magic vague north american setting, transwoman wwx, transwoman lwj, Gender Experimentation, Angst with a Happy Ending, Gender Dysphoria, followed by gender euphoria, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, switch rights) Its trans fem lan zhan descovering herself and how to let herself be true to herself, and wei ying (also transfem) was a big part of cracking her egg. It's still ongoing and it's really good!
~*~
3. ITMF fics that explore wwx’s cultivation - canon dynamics, preferably not cql compliant please!
🔒 Ad Oblivione by Baph, HikariNoHimeWriter (M, 70k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, Temporary Character Death, Canon-Typical Violence, POV Multiple, Hurt/Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Identity Reveal, Golden Core Reveal, Cultivation World Critical, Not JC Friendly, Abusive YZY, Angst with a Happy Ending)
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4. Hello! And thank you so much for all you do!! I’m in the mood for a fic set in canon universe where wangxian start a friends with benefits kind of thing, where they start having sex without discussing their feelings.
Always Light My Way by cqlorphan (E, 27k, wangxian, Post-Canon, Getting Together, Friends With Benefits, to lovers, wherein dual cultivation may be counted as a benefit, Jealous WWX, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Pining while fucking, angsty sex, Versatile | Switch WangXian, Bottom LWJ, Service Top LWJ, Topping from the Bottom, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Coming Untouched, Dom/sub Undertones, the angsty sex happens in the beginning but they get past it dw, Oblivious LWJ, archer WWX, Smart WWX, Porn with Feelings, Panic Attacks, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dual Cultivation)
~*~
5. ITMF a fic similar to hyperballad by azuresummer please!
🔒 姻緣 | this marriage was always predestinedby saccharinings (E, 43k, wangxian, Cheating, Infidelity, not between wangxian, WWX is married and LWJ persuades him to cheat on his husband with him, Dark LWJ, A/B/O, Feminizing Language, Exhibitionism, Size Difference, WagnXian Have a Breeding Kink, Stomach Bulge, Possessive LWJ, Manipulation, WWX Wears Lingerie, Rape/Non-con Elements, for one part, Hair-pulling Kink, Alpha LWJ, Omega WWX, Mirror Sex, Vibrators, Phone Sex, Rimming, Edgeplay, slight choking kink, Light Bondage, Inappropriate Use of Gūsū Lán Forehead Ribbon, LJY’s Big Fat Crush on Milfxian, Pregnant WWX, WangXian Endgame, Spanish Translation) maybe. It has some common elements but ah no murder I think. A Wen does get screwed over.
~*~
6. Hey its for the ITMF.
"A harmony between qin and se" by alaceron is one of my all-time favourites. It'd be great if you could recommend some wangxian fics with household intrigue and scheming. Lwj being a simp as a bonus is even better!! (doesn't matter if wwx is a male or female)
~*~
7. ITMF fics where WWX and LWJ end up accidentally married. Or ones where they end up married because of political/economic reasons. Canon era fics are preferred but will accept modern era if it’s the “we got married for tax benefits but i’m actually in love with you” kind of trope. Mpreg only if it’s really good please.
a long time coming by syriala (G, 2k, WangXian, Getting Together, Pining, Accidental Marriage, except it's not so accidental, Supportive LXC, Fluff)
30 Days of Secret Marriage at Cloud Recesses by starandrea (T, 43k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Bunnies, Gusu Lan Forehead Ribbon, Accidental Marriage, Coming Out, Falling In Love, supportive family, Fluff, Happy Ending, the whole story is happy)
🔒 the world passes by but for me there is only you by beeswaxing (E, 82k, wangxian, canon divergence, fix-it of sorts, golden core reveal, accidental marriage, love confessions, horny teenagers, pining, fluff, everybody lives, first time)
play your love songs all night long by AlfAlfAlfAlfAlf, tardigradeschool (E, 17k, WangXian, Modern AU, Marriage of Convenience, Mutual Pining, Light Angst, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, One Big Happy Family, Sharing a Bed, (platonically for 13 years), Therapy, in the grand tradition of the untamed most of this is flashback, Pegging, Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, Romantic Comedy, Misunderstandings)
Only Fools Rush In by vesna (mrsronweasley) (E, 27k, WangXian, Modern, Woke Up Married, alcohol use but no sex happens while drunk, Mutual Pining, Getting Together, what happens in Vegas etc etc)
What If….. Jiang Cheng Understood? by ToxicAngel13 (M, 66k, WIP, WangXian, Ribbons, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, WangXian Get Married in the Cold Springs Cave, Protective JC, Confused WWX, Angry LWJ, Fix-It of Sorts, Good Uncle LQR, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, POV LQR, YZY Bashing, POV JFM, Not JFM Friendly, Hurt/Comfort, Protective NHS)
The Simplest Way Forward by harriet_vane (E, 70k, WangXian, Modern AU, Accidental Baby Acquisition,Kid Fic, explicit in much much later chapters, green card marriage (but not really), pining for your own husband, endless pining, Slow Burn, Happy Ending, Nothing else bad or traumatic happens to the baby, [Podfic of] The Simplest Way Forward by knight_tracer) LWJ is in love when they effectively get married for tax purposes, and WWX gets there, and of course there's lots of pining for your husband
🔒 Two Weddings and a Family Reunion by scifigeek14 (T, 36k, wangxian, canon divergence, shotgun wedding, politics, everyone lives au, fix-it, feelings realization, family feels, marriage proposal, marriage of convenience)
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8. Hello! I am new to the fandom, I just finished watching the drama and I want more!!! I have been recced to your blog for fic suggestions? May I please have suggestions for canon compliant stories that are mostly light hearted (no heavy angst please)? I really enjoyed the mood in the first part of the show when all the characters were energetic and goofy teens, so perhaps some fics set then? I want more of the world, clans, costumes, etc. World building is maybe the right word? Thank you so much!
It’s Only Time by etymologyplayground (T, 8k, WangXian, Epistolary, Post-Canon, Canon Compliant, It’s About The Yearning., Getting Together, Love Confessions, Cuddling & Snuggling, Humor) this one is tagged as Post-Canon Canon Compliant so I hope it's okay
Twelve Moons and a Fortnight by stiltonbasket (M, 290k, WangXian, Humor, Slow Burn, Post-Canon Fix-It, Long-Distance Relationship, Epistolary, Love Letters, Family Feels, a-qing lives, teenage romance, Adoption, Romantic Comedy, Happy Ending, Weddings, Case Fic, Parenthood, Politics)
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9. ITMF: No JGY redemption. Like, he has many choices or someone give him another path to take but he still choose the unforgivable one. I dont want it from JGY's POV. I want it to focus on WWX story like in canon i guess? Thanks!
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10. For itmf, I'm craving some angst with a happy ending fics! Established relationship wangxian where they fight and/or break up and both of them are hurting a lot, but they make up and get back together. Thank you!
🔒 Wish I could forget the taste of your skin and the feel of your hands pinning me down by KizuKatana (E, 63k, wangxian, WQ & WWX & WN, Modern Cultivation, weapons-grade thirst, Getting Back Together, Trying REALLY hard to not still like your Ex, but failing, BAMF WWX, BAMF LWJ, Canon Divergence, Case Fic, LWJ’s canonically big dick, sort of a ‘thirsting for your co-worker ex’ vibe, it eventually gets worked out, Mutual Pining, Guest-starring LWJ’s canonically poor communication choices after romantic cave encounters, novel canon relationship dynamics, basically this fic is about escalating sexual tension)
estuaries by vesna (mrsronweasley) (E, 34k, wangixan, modern, breakup/makeup, pining while fucking, single dad WWX, angst w/ happy ending)
Tempo Rubato by Spodumene (E, 108k, wangxian, modern, angst w/ happy ending, romance, persuasion au, separations, pining, miscommunication, depression, self-harm, reconciliation, smut)
💖 love wakes me by dea_liberty (E, 46k, wangxian, modern, angst w happy ending, childhood sweethearts, misunderstanding, famous LWJ, coffee shop owner WWX, found families, grand romantic gestures)
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11. (This part added to fic finder, fic might be decay by antebunny)
Also, if you know any fics with similar plot (like Wei Ying being forced to cleanse from RE for "his own good" and getting hurt instead), i would appreciate the recommendations! Thank you 🍁 @shellennium
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12. I am hoping someone has fanfic with
A. Wei Wuxian becoming miserable after marrying into the Lan sect, a bit of lxc/lqr bashing but with them eventually realizing they were wrong, also if Wei Wuxian tries to commit suicide it would be better
B. Fanfics in which wwx doesn't want to have children but is forced because he is lwj's husband
C. Wwx having a parental figure for the first time, I don't want it to be the Jiang parents but anyone else is fine
Also, no jyl or long lwj bashing, please
12A)
Practical Considerations by teawater, the_anthropologist (E, 97k, WangXian, JC & WWX, LXC & WWX, LQR & WWX, Arranged Marriage, Canon Divergence, Found Family, Spouses to Lovers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Politics, Scheming, Lán Elders are assholes, BAMF WWX, BAMF LWJ, eventually BAMF LXC, learning to make decisions, Learning Self-worth, Self-Esteem Issues, Sweet Wangxian, Domestic Fluff, Fix-It, JC is a big asshole, he improves somewhat but it’s open-ended, WWX learns to stand up for himself, Quote: Come Back to Gusu With Me, POV wwx, POV LWJ, POV JC, Golden Core Reveal, Teacher wwx, Golden Core Transfer Fix-It, Alcohol as a Coping Mechanism, Past Suicidal Thoughts, Post-Sunshot Campaign, WWX Protection Squad, Feelings Realization, WWX protector of the twin jades, Protective LWJ, Protective WWX, Protective LQR, Demonic Cultivator WWX, WWX is Loved, Married WangXian, Genius WWX, Everybody Lives)
Concord by Deastar (T, 41k, WangXian, Arranged Marriage, Gusu Lan Sect Rules, Depression, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending)
12C)
safe here with me by xcourtney_chaoticx (G, 3k, WangXian, Family Feels, Good Uncle LQR, WWX Goes to Gusu, Fluff, Childhood Friends, Friends to Lovers, Food Issues, Endgame WangXian)
Scars of Lightning by The_peregrine_falcon (T, 6k, YZY & WWX, WWX & WRH, WangXian, YZY’s A+ Parenting, Canon Divergence, Not Canon Compliant, Wen WWX, zidian, YZY is a bitch, Canon-Typical Violence, Blood and Injury, Major Character Injury, Heavy Angst, Lotus Pier, Nightless City, Young WWX, Muteness, Hurt kind of comfort)
藍色的花,紅色的蘭 {Lan se de hua, hongse de lan} by Admiranda, AshayaTReldai (M, 45k, WIP, WangXian, Orphan WWX, Friends to Lovers, Childhood Friends, wwx raised in the lan clan, softer lqr, Good Uncle LQR, Good lan clan, Good Older Sibling LXC)
🔒 crying like a fire in the sun by Reverie (cl410) (T, 10k, WangXian, SongXiao, BSSR/LY, Runaway WWX, Canon Divergence, Everyone Lives/Nobody Die, rogue cultivator WWX, Angst, Post Cloud Recesses, Not YZY Friendly, Happy Ending, BSSR is WWX’s grandmother instead of grandmaster)
Crimson leaves by barisan (T, 4k, WangXian, WWX & OFC(s), WWX Leaves the Yunmeng Jiang Sect, Rogue Cultivator WWX, WWX gets lesbian grandmothers, WWX learns about his parents, WWX is a Wen, (Through his lesbian granny but still), Getting Together, WWX Has a Fear of Dogs, Pre-Canon, Genius WWX)
All Things Belong by kuroi_atropos (M, 93k, WRH & WWX, WangXian, WN & WWX, WWX is a Wen, Abuse, Whipping, Manipulations, Warning: WRH, Smart WWX, Possessive Behavior, Warning: JGS, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Past Rape/Non-con, Society Level Victim Blaming, Victim Blaming)
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13. Hii, so I'm looking for fics kinda enemies to lovers but not exactly 😅 like one of them is reluctant to get together at first? Or at least it looks like it, like in All The Roads or The earthquake in the room, both the I highly recommend btw. Thanks a lot @akutamichan
baby let’s take the long way home by plonk (Not rated, 10k, WangXian, Modern with Magic, Abortion, Mpreg, With A Twist, Enemies to Lovers)
🔒 no certainty of doors between us by betts (T, 6k, WangXian, Modern AU, College/University, Roommates, Crack Treated Seriously, Drunken Confessions, Idiots in Love, dubiously consensual spooning, Enemies to Lovers, Sharing Clothes, Hurt/Comfort, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, wwx’s casual intimacy meets lwj’s touch starvation, wwx doesn’t know they’re enemies, lwj doesn’t know they’re dating)
varied my velocities by fantasiavii (E, 58k, WangXian, Modern AU, Ballerina LWJ, Football/Soccer player WWX, Enemies to Lovers, Top WWX/Bottom LWJ, Dom WWX, Angst with a happy ending, Internalized homophobia)
🔒 The Second Jade of Lan’s late but incendiary sexual awakening by KizuKatana (E, 41k, wangxian, First Time, LWJ’s Horny Grip, LWJ does not know what hit him, and yet somehow he still realizes it before WWX, canon wangxian dynamics, college AU, LWJ starts off annoyed at WWX, But quickly discovers both his competency kink and a caretaking kink, Genius WWX)
Documented Fact by Scrippio (T, 7k, WangXian, LSZ & LJY & OYZZ, Modern with Magic, College/University, Professors, Minor Injuries, Misunderstandings, Fluff, OYZZ POV, Humor) which features married Wangxian but everyone believes they're enemies.
~*~
14. This account is a treasure!!! What I’m looking for are the post WWX resurrection fics that address Wangxian age gap. Can be fun, kinky, healing, basically anything. @feanarotherindion
Help, My Dad Is Fucking Someone My Age!! by sweetlolixo (T, 3k, WangXian, LSZ & LWJ, Canon Divergence, Humor, Crack, Fluff, Romance)
~*~
15. I recently read fic While covered in mud by merthurlin. And I really love badass Huaisang who takes matters into his own hands earlier in the story. Is there any more fic where Huaisang went into Burial Mounds like that? Or just awesome badass scary Huaisang in general. I have huge need to read some badass Huaisang who will get recognized for his mastery too.
Story-Shaped by lingering_song (T, 13k, NHS & WWX, wangxian, Post-Canon, Chief Cultivator LWJ, Inventor WWX, Found Family, NHS needs a new hobby, And apparently that’s spoiling his Wei-Xiong, Mentioned Character Death, Alcohol, Protective NHS, WangXian Endgame, Not JC Friendly, Not particularly gentry sects friendly overall tbh)
💖 demons run when a good man goes to warby Miranda_Aurelia (T, 20k, wangxian, LWJ & NHS, JYL/JZX, canon divergence, angst w happy ending, NHS & LWJ friendship, not JGY friendly, dark LWJ, revenge, (presumed) major character death, not LXC friendly)
The Lost Cause by KouriArashi (T, 18k, JGY & NHS, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Murder Bros, NHS is a boss bitch, JGY is a hot mess, Everybody Lives, except the people who suck, (lookin at you JGS and JZN))
The Threads of Fate by WaitForTheSnitch (E, 78k, WangXian, WIP, Time Travel Fix-It, Canon Divergence, Not Everyone Dies, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Cloud Recesses Shenanigans, Good Uncle LQR, Protective LWJ, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, Pining LWJ, WWX in WWX's Body, JC & WWX Reconciliation, is it reconciliation if WWX doesn't know they were estranged?, Oblivious WWX, WWX Deserves Better, WWX Deserves Happiness, Siblings JC & WWX, Supportive JYL, Protective NHS, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Comic Book Science) If the requester doesn't mind a WIP, the frequently updating The Threads of Fate is another good one that features a brilliant Nie Huaisang.
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16. itmf for fics where lan wangji is very forward? in terms of flirting or expressing his adoration/ attraction for wei wuxian
can be canon or au or even modern au!
(just no side jc/wq please)
🔒Tangible by apathyinreverie (T, 2k, WangXian, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Canon Divergence, Fluff, Humor, Possessive LWJ, First Kiss, Getting Together, the library scene)
Tripped at Every Step by brooklinegirl (E, 28k, WangXian)
dream of a funeral; hear of a marriage by defractum (nyargles) (T, 36k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Happy Ending, Domestic Fluff, First Time, Fluff and Humor)
loveliness by orphan_account (T, 1k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Pining, Teen Romance, Getting Together)
body and soul by TooSel (E, 41k, wangxian, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Marriage Proposal, Everyone Lives AU, Cultivation Sect Politics, Yílíng Wèi Sect AU, Adoption, Smut, Friends to Lovers, Angst with a Happy Ending)
💖 Echo, Murmur, Dream, Here by bluerainmist (M, 51k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Universe Alteration, the yiling patriarch survives, Angst with a Happy Ending, Catharsis, Slow Burn, Drama, Getting Together, Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Melancholy, Love, Mutual Pining, Reunions, Love Confessions, Eventual Smut, Blow Jobs, Anal Sex, Switching, Grief/Mourning, fucking while pining, Implied/Referenced Torture, Self-Harm, golden core transfer, Playing fast and loose with worldbuilding, Battle Scenes, Canon-Typical Violence, Canonical Character Death, implied / Referenced suicide attempt, Sect Leader WWX, YLLZ WWX, Yílíng Wèi Sect)
❤️ Standing Engagement by x_los (M, 18k, wangxian, misunderstandings, accidental engagement, sunshot campaign, golden core reveal, accidental relationship, WQ lives, everyone lives au, Mojo’s post)
Give Me One Good Honest Kiss by thunderwear (T, 1k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, First Kiss, horny LWJ agenda, LXC is suffering in LQR’s name, [PODFIC] Give Me One Good Honest Kiss by thunderwear)
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17. ITMF where WWX agree to come to gusu in exchange of wen remnants protection. I want WWX accept the lan condirion to lock him up. I want him to live lifelessly/aphatic/just living because he is nit dead yet. Or maybe like in Always walked a very thin line by tucuxi.
Bonus if LWJ/LXC/LQR managed to make WWX scream at them and tell them whats wrong with him in anger. Thanks
The Forsaken Jade Statue by SaiaiSaiko (Not Rated, 7k, WangXian, Curse Breaking, Curses, WWX Goes to Gusu, Dark Gusu Lan Sect Imprisonment, Seclusion as Imprisonment, YLLZ WWX, Older LWJ, Older LXC, Cursed LWJ, petrification, Hopeful Ending) Wei Wuxian in 'Seclusion' for the Wen's protection and stumbling over Lan Wangji cursed to be a statue
~*~
If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***
#wangxian#mdzs#wangxian fic recs#i'm in the mood for a fic#the untamed#wangxian fic search#wangxianficfinder#long post
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Peggysuave's Masterlist
All of my fics are x AFAB!reader (reads like an ambiguous OC for my Feyd fics), include explicit sexual content, most are fairly dark and explore complex and morally grey relationships, some include dub-con/non-con themes ‼️
Finished ✅, Ongoing ✏️, Ao3 only 🔺
Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen | Henry Creel | Ominis Gaunt | Roman Godfrey | Ghostface | Frank Morrison
-> RELIC 🌌
✧Dreams are messages from the deep ✧ A woman from the unknown comes to Feyd in his dreams and his nights become his days as he flees to the dreamscape to escape the nightmares that haunt his waking hours. [Lucid Dreaming, Vulnerable Feyd, Female Rage] Series Masterlist ✏️
-> PREYD 🩸
Feyd calls his pet to his chambers for a monthly feast. [Dub-con, blood/period kink, knife "play", 2.2k] ✅
-> NIGHT CRAWLER 🍼
Feyd-Rautha welcomes a nocturnal visitor in his chambers, who is plagued by the symptoms of her artificially induced condition. [Dub-con, lactation kink, breast feeding, 9.7k] Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 ✅
-> HERE COMES THE SUN 🌞
Feyd-Rautha is the center of attention for an entire planet, but it counts for nothing because his favorite concubine isn't paying attention during the fight. How dare she ruin his birthday? [Jealousy, Mutual Pining, Marriage Proposal, 6.8k] ✅ Part 1, Part 2
-> HOLY SEED 🙏
Feyd so badly wants to plant his seed deep inside his wife's belly. [Breeding Kink without Breeding, Switch Feyd & FMC, 2.5k] ✅
-> THE ART OF EMPATHY 🪴
After the fall of House Harkonnen, an innocent poison flower is planted in their evil heart to teach them the art of empathy. [Bene Gesserit FMC, Soft!Feyd, Redemption, 6.3k] ✅🔺
-> KALEIDOSCOPE ⚔️
In a fight for freedom or death against the na-Baron Feyd-Rautha, his woman figures out how she feels about him. A poor devil wrapped in the skin of a beast. [Gore, Blood for Lube, Mutilation, Public Sex, 2.7k] ✅🔺
-> KINKTOBER 2024 🤤
Feyd-Rautha edition. Based on this prompt list. ✏️
-> CARDINAL SIN ✝️
You follow a trail of corpses to the rainbow room and find a bloodied angel. [Blood & Corpses, Fucking in the Rainbow Room, 4.2k] ✅🔺
-> YOU & ME 💑
“There's a second facility…” Dr. Brenner wheezed. “And what's inside of this facility?” “A woman… One woman.” “What is she capable of?” “…Anything.” Henry’s eyes blazed up with fresh hope. Greedy, frantic wicked hope. “I need to have her.” [Stockholm Syndrome, Quantum Physics, 37k] ✅🔺
-> HURTS LIKE A DISEASE 💔
An apathetic sociopath meets an insecure overthinker with anxiety. After an embarrassing incident at the cafeteria of Hawkins Lab, a man named Peter Ballard takes morbid fascination in your displayed insecurities and anxiety, because like him, you don't seem to fit in with the other humans and society. From now on, he wants to study and observe you. Unfortunately, you agree. [Mental Illness, problematic relationship, 55k] ✅🔺
-> LOCKED UP, CAN'T GET YOU OFF MY MIND ⛓️
When Dr. Brenner came to the conclusion that 001’s powers were uncontrollable, he decided to dispose of the useless subject who was proof of his failure as a scientist. Isolated in a cell on the minus third floor of Hawkins Lab, 001 is locked up to rot and be forgotten. You are hired to be his prison guard, his nurse, his orderly, responsible for 001’s health and well-being. The full-time job goes well for many years, until eventually your morals start crumbling away… [Power Imbalance, Forbidden Romance, Switch!Henry, 41k] ✅🔺
-> RUNNING IN THE NIGHT 🌃
You are a master of lucid dreaming, able to create all kinds of wondrous things and go on the most fantastic adventures in your sleep. One night, you receive a mysterious call in your dream. From then on, you find your mind being invaded by an uncanny, clingy, pushy intruder night after night, who tries to convince you that he is not just a product of your imagination, but a real person with telepathic powers. [Lucid Dreaming, Toxic Lovers, Jealousy, 50k] ✅🔺
-> OH, ASHES... 🌪️
On a stormy day, the ashes had whispered to you for the first time. Like shadowy fingertips, their call for help had ghosted over your heart and mind. Now, three years later, you finally fully accepted the quest that had been given to you – To liberate the ashes’ home dimension from the plague that had infested it, by summoning the surprisingly human parasite back to its own birth realm and taking him under your wing. [Burnt!Henry, Modern Setting, Master/Servant, 44k] ✅🔺
-> PEGGY'S PETER PÖRN COLLECTION 📚
A collection of smutty oneshots. Every chapter is a complete story. Porn with plot, porn with no plot, plot with porn, but there is always porn! <3 There will be dark themes, kinky shit, AUs and madness. So, beware! Warnings for each chapter. [BDSM, Stockholm Syndrome, Sex Toys, Angel!AU... 104k] ✅🔺
-> MILKY EYES 👁️
The unseeing gaze of the mysterious boy named Ominis seems permanently glued on you, and as weeks turn into months, you feel like he begins following you around the castle. Between unease and anger, you feel something else, so you confront him in a deserted hallway after dark. OR: Who the hell is Mark Markson? And what does his cabbage have to do with it? And most importantly, why are you and Ominis clapping cheeks all across Hogwarts? [Strangers to Lovers, Ambiguous Encounters, Dominis, 81k] ✅🔺
-> SAW YOU DANCING FROM ACROSS THE ROOM 💃
You are at a party, minding your own business, when suddenly you're being rudely scolded from behind. It turns out, the host of the party himself is scolding you and you have no idea why. Insulted and confused, you try to avoid him for the rest of the nigth. It doesn't go well. [Extremely dub-con, Dead Dove, Choking, Spanking, 6k] ✅🔺
Please beware, the fics below this point are REAL old and shitty in comparison 😔
-> LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DO 🔪
Danny Johnson is your best friend. But little do you know he wanted to be so much more than that from the day he first met you. Eventually you say something that gives him the final straw - He will make you love him back, one way or another. [Dub/Non-Con, Best Friends Trope, Jealousy, 11k] ✅🔺
-> BUNNY ON THE RUN 🐇
You're just an average girl who likes reading smutty fanfictions about dangerous psychos and serial killers and all of sudden you find yourself face to face with a serial killer in real life. Luckily, fanfictions have perfectly prepared you for situations likesuch. [Dub-Con, Knife Play, Anal Sex, Outdoor Sex, 4k] ✅🔺
-> TAKE A DIRTY PICTURE FOR ME 📸
An accidental boob slip gets you into a heated up situation. [Dub-Con, Non-Consensual Voyeurism, Light Bondage, 9.5k] ✅🔺
-> MIRROR MIRROR ON THE WALL 👊
Frank and you are college freshmen and roommates but not only do your personalities clash, you end up getting into heated disputes on a daily basis. One day you come home late and catch him red-handed masturbating. Unfortunately, Karma is a bitch and Frank gets his revenge on you just a little later. [Room Mates, Accidental Voyeurism, Hate Sex, 11.5k] ✅🔺
-> A FRENZIED ENCOUNTER 🏔️
You spawn in a place that you've never been to and encounter a man that you have never seen before. But he is not who you think he is. When he finally gets a hold of you things get more heated up than you ever imagined they could. [Dub-Con, Knife Play, Blowjobs, Playing Chase, 6.3k] ✅🔺
#feyd rautha#feyd rautha harkonnen#feyd x reader#feyd#feyd x you#feyd x oc#dune fanfiction#dune part two#dune part 2#dune#dune 2#feyd smut#austin butler#peggysuave fanfics#peggysuave masterlist#peggyao3 masterlist#henry creel#stranger things#henry creel x reader#henry creel x you#peter ballard#ominis gaunt#Ominis Gaunt x Reader#hogwarts legacy#Ghostface#ghostface x reader#danny johnson x reader#frank morrison#frank morrison x reader#dead by daylight
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You know, the more I think about it, the funnier I find the concept of Monkey D. Luffy /& Boa Hancock (especially paired with Aro-Ace spectrum Luffy and Aro-Ace spectrum Hancock) just for what it must look like from an outsider's POV.
For the record, personally, my favorite Luffy ship is Zoro/Luffy - also with Aro-Ace spectrum Luffy, that's basically non-negotiable for me, I don't care whether he's sex-favorable or sex-repulsed, but he's definitely ace. It is so funny to me to think about Luffy's incredible pull with aro-ace spectrum folks. People who once thought "sucks for you fuckers obsessed with sex and/or romance, I'm built different" (Roronoa Zoro, Koby, Trafalgar Law, Boa Hancock, Bartolomeo, etc.) find themselves fascinated by this little rubber man, who regularly declares war on the government and can swallow a roast chicken whole. Some of them are happier about this than others. Some of them WISH they just wanted to fuck or marry him, that would make more sense than this shit.
But, okay, back to Luffy and Hancock (as a friendship or queerplatonic situationship, whatever, doesn't matter). Like, let's pretend this is some kind of Modern College AU (Luffy is probably not IN college, tbh, he's just there to hang out with his friends and for any food anyone makes the mistake of leaving out). You are on your way to class and you see this woman walking down the street and she is - hands down - the Most Beautiful Woman In The World.
Super tall, with incredibly long, muscular legs in shockingly high red heels, a short skirt, artful cleavage, a waterfall of sleek black hair, beautiful face, striking makeup, gorgeous jewelry. Looks too old to be an undergrad student. She looks like if a martial artist became a supermodel. Walks like that too. The phrase "please step on me" comes to mind, but not to the lips, because that's sexual harassment, and also this woman looks like she could stab you through the heart with a kick and her shoe heel, killing you instantly.
She sees someone and her entire face lights up. She runs forward (how is she running in those shoes) squealing in excitement and embraces this guy you didn't even notice before, shouting about how much she missed him, and kisses him on the lips. He is... uh... three-quarters of her height at the tallest. A real Mr. Short King.
Wow, he has a babyface. And a scar on his cheek and on his chest, which you can see because he's wearing an open button-up, in eye-searing rainbow colors and decorated with monkeys, and jorts with fur at the cuffs. And mismatched flip-flops on the wrong feet. And a straw hat on a string around his neck. It looks like he hasn't brushed his hair today. It is impossible to judge his looks because his outfit is too distracting. Now the Most Beautiful Woman in the World is blushing bright pink as she clasps one of his hands in both of hers. Mr. Short King is using his other hand to pick his nose as she talks.
They walk hand in hand together over to where an incredibly expensive-looking bright red car is parked. Mr. Short King opens the driver's door for the Most Beautiful Woman and she apparently nearly swoons at this chivalry. She climbs into the driver's seat and he gets into the passenger's side (Luffy cannot legally drive and also cannot actually drive). They drive off together. What the fuck kind of Roger-and-Jessica-Rabbit-ass Sugar Mama relationship did you just witness?
Boa Hancock keeps a photograph of Luffy as her phone background and also on her desk at work. Everyone is always like, "Is that your... son?" And Hancock is like, "No, that's my number one choice of future fiancé! Isn't he sooooo handsome?" And people can only be like, "...Okay, but why are there police lights in the background? And something is on fire? It kind of looks like he's in the process of being arrested..." And Hancock responds dreamily, "They didn't catch him! He climbed into my exercise duffel bag and I carried him out."
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Eisenhower don't give a fuck
Barbie dolls: Dave Lizewski x gn! Also superhero! Reader
Word:3.1k
Summary: you're also a hero and find out Dave (your boyfriend) is kickass and flirt with him to see his reaction
Warnings: you have daddy issues now, you don't like orange popsicles, based on the second movie so if you haven't watched that it's probably not going to make sense, I'm not suggesting you should watch it bc I hate the romance plot in it but you do you, also insinuated that you're apart of the lgbtq+ and or an extremely passionate ally, feeling unloyal even though you aren't cheating, lots of sex jokes and mentions, you think you're weird and annoying, Marty and you are mean to each other in the friend way yk
Request: seriously stop going through my stuff
Dating Dave was actually quite enjoyable. You could geek over comics together. You sat with his friends during lunch. You scribbled in his notes before returning them, little hearts around the corners. You shared almost everything with each other. The key word there: almost.
Was being a real-life superhero easy? Fuck no. But it gave you that adrenaline rush you got from flirting with Dave so how bad could it be? Not to mention you got to prance around town in your very extremely awesome outfit. You liked it, a lot. You liked people following you on your socials. You liked seeing yourself on the news. You liked helping people and seeing the relief on their faces. You like hanging out with Kickass and all the others in Justice Forever.
Remembering Tommy were a bit of a drag all things considered, but you loved sitting down and hearing about all their life experiences. In fact, a couple of their nuggets of advice actually made you change your day-to-day.
You loved talking and working with Doctor Gravity. He made you laugh and was amazing at his side gig. He’s probably saved your life a thousand times already.
You quite enjoyed talking to Insect Man. In your free time together, you felt like you were able to shed your walls and talk to him about anything. In fact, you went with him to the pride parade in town and helped him organize a local protest.
You were often paired up with Night Bitch because according to Colonel stars and stripes: you had complimentary personalities. You liked being paired up with her because you actually grew to be friends.
Battle Guy had his funny moments. You two seemed to get along but he appeared to be quite attached to Kick-Ass. Which you didn’t mind because you had your own attachments.
To be quite frank, you had already mentally adopted Colonel Stars and Stripes as your father figure. You weren’t sure if he was aware of that. You did however know he called you peanut so maybe he did know.
Sometimes when you asked for advice from him, it sounded like something Juno would hear from her father. It sounded like a dinner, shared over the wooden dining room table, that you helped make even though you couldn’t reach the kitchen counter. It sounded like a movie with ice cream while you were decked out in his band t-shirt even though it was for an adult and you were nothing of the sort.
Every time he told you you did a good job after a night of moderate crime fighting, you felt like he just hung up your stick figures on the fridge. Though you doubted he thought of it that way. It wouldn’t be the first time a random male authority figure became your only source of validation.
Though on the Kick-Ass note, he was strange. You’d mutter an inside joke to yourself, and hear a snort come from Kick-Ass. You just assumed he was quite perceptive. When you two were left alone, there was this strange tension floating between you two. It felt like deja vu. It felt like when you visit an art museum, see a familiar face, can’t place it, and then find it in the mirror the next morning. You just hadn’t gotten to the next morning yet. He made you feel weird. You felt like you should run away from him and hide behind Dave.
You felt unloyal just knowing there was weird tension between you and Kick-Ass. Even though you apparently got along quite well. You laughed at the same jokes, even the same words in some cases. You liked the same movies and comic books. You even thought he was just as funny as Dave. Which you hated because Dave was very important to you.
Every time you laughed at Kick-Ass’ jokes you felt your heart squeeze at the thought of Dave sitting at home thinking of you. After every laugh, you both sighed heavily like you could feel the weight of something returning to your shoulders. You assumed he was thinking of his homework or some shit. It wasn’t your business but you were positive it wasn’t hypothetical infidelity.
You avoided pairing up with Kick-Ass. You didn’t even stand next to him. You didn’t want his vibes getting onto your skin. Alas, Colonel Stars and Stripes didn’t pick up on your subtlety, pairing you two together again.
Though this time was different. You two had just been wandering around, waiting for some crime to catch up with you. You mentioned your favorite movie of all time and Kick-Ass dropped possibly the best thing you had ever heard.
“Oh my god, my partner fucking loves that movie.” Ah, see most people don’t normally enjoy learning someone has a partner, you, on the other hand, loved this new piece of information. You stopped walking. Kick-ass turned back around to probably raise an eyebrow, you can’t see.
“You have a partner?” You asked, already feeling your lips peel into a grin. Kick-Ass shrugged.
“Yeah? Is that so unbelievable?” He asked, slapping his hand onto the side of his thigh. You shook your head.
“No, It’s not unbelievable.” You said. You skipped, literally, ahead. You were beaming the rest of the night. You still tried to ignore Kick-Ass during the other meeting though now with the new information you were slightly less abrasive.
One night, alike many other nights, Dave knocked on your door right as you were getting ready for bed. You raised a brow at his appearance. He was missing his glasses, and nacho cheese was smeared over his face, primarily over his eye and mouth area. Though it wasn’t in his hair or on his clothes.
“Dude, you have to stop eating so messy. It is not a good look for you.” You said, pulling the door open further.
“Someone threw nachos at me, which I am quite upset about. I wanted to kiss you once I got over here but now I have to clean my face.” Dave said, shrugging his backpack and jacket off to drop them by the door. You snorted, making the corner of Dave’s mouth tip up. He left for the bathroom. You stood in the doorway and watched him, committing the image to your memory so you could think of Dave while you were on the hunt for misbehavior. Dave glanced at you from the corner of his eye before squeezing them closed again to scrub his face with water. He pulled his head back, blowing water away from his mouth with a huff.
“Could you get my glasses and extra shirt out of my bag?” Dave asked, dipping his head back to the sink. You spun around and headed for his bag. You thought for a moment, which pocket would Dave put his glasses and extra shirt in? Of course the biggest one. You zipped it open. You paused when you were met with a plastic bag covered in red font repeating ‘Thank you’. You furrowed your brows at the sight of green peeking through the white. You pulled on the loose knot, staring down at the very iconic Kick-Ass green covered in nacho cheese. You paused and thought back on it.
Kick-Ass laughed at the inside jokes that you only made with Dave. Kick-Ass had a partner who had the same favorite movie as you. Of course Kick-Ass made you feel some weird tension because he was your fucking boyfriend. You never ever heard Dave talk bad about Kick-Ass. They had the same favorite comics, movies literally everything. You finally reached the next morning.
“Holy shit.” You whispered, glad the sink was still running so Dave couldn’t hear you.
“They should be in the front pocket, baby,” Dave called from the bathroom. You retied the plastic bag and zipped up the big pocket as fast as you could. You brought Dave his glasses and extra shirt and pretended you had no idea the whole night.
However, on the next mission, you volunteered to pair with Kick-Ass. Kick-Ass gave you a questioning look. You shrugged. Eventually, you two were off, once again wandering about. You knew you truly shouldn’t but you wanted to fuck with Dave a little.
“Hey, Kick-Ass? You said you have fucked nerve endings right? You can’t feel when people hit you?” You said, balancing the edge of the sidewalk, your arms stuck out on either side of you. Kick-ass was walking next to you, his hands clasped behind his back.
“No, you can’t slap me,” Kick-Ass responded, taking one step away from you.
“No, I was just wondering if that made it hard for you to have sex. Like does that fuck with those nerve endings?” You said blatantly, keeping your eyes on the sidewalk so you didn’t fall. Kick-ass sputtered, making you grin.
“What? No. I mean, No that’s none of your business.” Kick-Ass said, taking another step away from you. You snorted. You stopped and dropped your hands to your sides.
“You sure? ‘Cause I could help you out with that. There’s a public restroom right around the corner. Or we could just use the alley.” You said, taking a step closer to him. Dave held his hands up in surrender, leaning away from you.
“I have a partner. I am dating someone. They sexually gratify me perfectly. I am seeing someone, who I love deeply. I am severely committed.” Kick-Ass said, squeezing his eyes shut. You snorted and walked away from him, completely ignoring the fact that now your face was hot from him confessing his love.
“I’m just fucking with you Dave, don’t take me seriously. I would never fuck in an alley, that’s like STD grand central station.” You said, balancing on the edge of the sidewalk again.
“Sorry, wait, what’d you call me?” Kick-Ass asked. You kept walking, though now you thought back on your words. You grimaced when you realized you called him by his real name.
“I called you a bitch.” You said. Well done, that was perfect. No notes. Kick-Ass met your pace, walking beside you. He leaned his head to the side, trying to make eye contact with you.
“No, you didn’t. What did you call me?” He asked. You shrugged.
“You called me Dave. Why did you do that?” You stopped and met his eyes. You shrugged.
“I think we actually do need that alley now, come with me.” You split off to the nearest alley, pulling Dave into the shadows. You glanced around to make sure no one was around before yanking your mask off.
“It’s me, Dave.” Kick-Ass gasped, taking a step away from you. He spun around, his hands on his head.
“Oh my god, I’ve slept with a real-life superhero.” He muttered. He pulled his mask off, dragging his hands through his hair.
”To be fair I also had this reaction when I found out about you.” You said, shoving your mask into your belt. Dave spun back around to you, gripping your face with both his hands.
“God, you gorgeous pain in the ass. I love you so much.” He pulled you closer to him, resting his lips against yours. You reached out and tugged him closer by the green fabric pulled over his stomach. Dave groaned into your lips, slipping his hands under your arms to hold onto your back. He pulled back just enough to whisper to you.
“Stars and Stripes is going to kill us,” Dave said. You nodded against him, pushing your lips back against his.
“Stop thinking about him, think about how we’re totally going to fuck in these costumes.” You muttered. Dave’s hand found the back of your head, holding you still while he slipped his tongue past your lips.
By the time everyone did meet back at the base, you and Kick-ass were stuck together like glue. Colonel dismissed everyone, but Kick-ass’ hand shot out for Battle Guys’ arm.
“Hey Coronal, we have bad news.” You said. Colonel turned around looking between you three.
“You haven’t started selling drugs have you?” You shook your head.
“We all know each other, in real life,” Kick-Ass said. Battle Guy jerked his arm out of Kick-Ass’ hand.
“No, the fuck we don’t. I know you,” Battle Guy pointed at Kick-Ass. “Don’t know who that is.” Battle Guy pointed at you. You made a mental note to add a middle finger to Marty’s birthday card. Colonel grimaced at Battle Guy.
“Language.” Colonel pinched his brow as he looked between the three of you. “How long have you known this?”
“I’ve known since yesterday, Kick-Ass found out today. Battle Guy is apparently still behind.” You said. Colonel sighed.
“Do you hate me?” You asked, making Colonel raise an eyebrow.
“Why would I hate you?” You shrugged, feeling everyone’s eyes turn to you.
“I don’t know. I was just checking because-“
“Oh my god.” You heard Battle Guy say. You glanced over at him to see him wandering away from the line you three had formed.
“What!” You responded, following him with your eyes. He dragged his hands over his head.
“I just figured out who you are.” He said, dropping his hands to his sides. ”I recognized you from your daddy issues.” You scoffed at Marty.
“You recognized me from my daddy issues? You know what-“ You said, your voice raising. You pointed your finger at Battle Guy. Kick-ass’ hands shot out, pressing either one to you and Marty’s chest.
“Okay, okay. No fighting, there’s no point.” You sighed, dropping it. You faced Colonel again. He hummed.
“Do you know what we call this?” Colonel said, waving his hands around at you three. You shrugged, glancing at Dave to see if he knew.
“No?” Kick-ass muttered.
“Loserville party of one?” Battle Guy asked. You huffed, looking around Dave to glare at Marty. Kick-ass reached out and lightly pushed your head back.
“Not my problem. C’mon Eisenhower. Let’s allow these doofuses to solve this on their own.” Colonel replied, tugging on Eisenhower’s leash. She quickly pranced after him. You waited until you heard the door slam shut before tugging your mask off. You turned to Marty, sticking your finger in his face again.
“Fuck you, Marty. I’m setting your birthday present on fire.” You said, huffing and turning away from Marty.
“Yeah, that wasn’t necessary. We talked about how we don’t bring up parental issues anymore, Marty. There was an entire family meeting about it.” Dave said, pulling off his own mask. Marty huffed and yanked his off.
“I didn’t listen during that meeting and you know it,” Marty responded.
“Still.”
“Whatever Marty, just don’t talk about it again.” You said, pulling your mask back over your head and leaving the building.
Marty did apologize the next evening at Dave’s house. You, Marty, Todd, and Dave went over to Dave’s house every day to hang out because the time at school you had together just wasn’t enough.
You and Marty were sat outside, eating the popsicles you stole from the freezer. Dave’s dad banned everyone from eating them inside because once Marty dropped one on the couch. It's been forever sticky. So there you two were, sitting on the steps of the back porch in the dark. The dull and faded light from the living room stretched out through the glass sliding door.
“I actually am sorry, about the other night. I know sometimes I am a dick. I don’t know why I’m like that. I just am.” Marty said, taking another bit of his orange popsicle. You hummed.
“I’m the same way. Sometimes I’m just weird and annoying, I don’t know why. Just am.” You said, chomping into the blue popsicle you were holding. Marty hummed, licking down the side of his hand at the streak of melted juice. A quiet moment went by where you stared up at the dark sky and ignored the very loud sound of Marty slurping.
“For what it’s worth, I don’t think you’re annoying,” Marty said, biting into his popsicle again. You paused on your popsicle, looking over at him.
“Really?” Marty nodded, glancing at you from the corner of his eye.
“I mean weird, for sure-“ You shoved Marty’s shoulder.
“Oh fuck off.” You laughed, shaking your head at him. Marty snorted. You continued with your popsicle, though now your lips were tilted up.
“Also when I said Loserville party of one, I was talking about you,” Marty added, taking another bite out of his popsicle. You rolled your eyes.
“I know!”
“Just checking, 'cause you never laughed,” Marty said, tilting his head back to catch the runaway bit of popsicle.
“Yeah, it wasn’t funny.” You both sat in silence as you paused in eating your popsicle to watch Marty and his messy eating. He pulled back and glanced at you.
“So do you actually think of Colonel Stars and Stripes as your dad?” He asked, chomping again. You scoffed. You shoved his shoulder again, making him rock to the side. You finished your popsicle, licking the wooden stick. Marty was maybe two bites from finishing his. The glass door slid open. You turned back. Dave smiled at you.
“You guys coming in soon? We’re about to set up our next board game.” Dave said. Marty turned back, nodding at Dave.
“Yeah, baby.” Dave hummed and took the four steps from the door to you. He leaned down and lightly pecked your lips. He pulled back, his tongue darting it between his lips.
“Blue?” You nodded. He hummed and left, sliding the glass door behind him. Marty waited a moment, watching Dave retreat to the coffee table through the glass. You watched too although for different reasons.
“How long is Dave?” Marty asked. You gasped, smacking the last bite of popsicle out of Marty’s hand. It flipped in the air and leaned in the grass with an unsatisfying ‘thush’.
“Hey! What was that for?” Marty said, sadly looking down at the orange popsicle bite now covered in green grass.
“Potty mouth.” You said, standing up. You picked your popsicle stick off the step. Marty stood up after you, joining you at your side.
“It was ass anyway,” Marty muttered. You nodded, dragging open the glass door.
“You picked orange, I’m not sure what you were expecting.” You said, throwing your stick into the garbage. You and Marty joined Dave and Todd at the coffee table to start the game. You greeted Dave with a kiss and settled onto the floor next to him. Marty sat across from you and wiggled his eyebrows at you.
“I’m not answering your sick question dude!” You responded. Dave worriedly hummed.
“What’d he ask you?” Dave asked. You shook your head and patted his cheek.
“Don’t worry your pretty head about it.”
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Crashing On Crush. JJK 4 [m]
crush!Jungkook x reader
Genre: smut; series; romance; angst
Words: 4.9k
Synopsis: What happens when your first encounter with your crush is Jungkook seeing your ass?
Warnings: alcohol consumption; protected sex; oral sex (f. receiving); praising kink; mention of passed harassment
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Jungkook left a few minutes after because he had to wake up early the next morning. You were disappointed because after sharing such an intimate moment, you would have liked him to stay. You have felt so close to him. And you had the feeling that your connection disappeared with his absence. You have felt so alive, and the next moment you are completely alone, and not so much alive. It was kind of terrifying how your mood changed because of him: you were beyond clouds when he was next to you, and completely in the darkness when he left. This emotional rollercoaster made you cried that night. You were too lost in your own feelings. You felt closer to him and at the same time so far away.
The whole next day, you kept making mistakes at work, your brain overthinking the last night. You were thinking about Jungkook and wondering if he were thinking about you too. The possibility of it not being the case and of you being just another girl he had fun with squeezed your heart.
That's why, heading out of the art gallery, you thought like you could finally breathe. The pure fresh air of Seoul filled your lungs like it was your very first breathing. That's when you saw him, leaning against his black Mercedes.
Jungkook smiles at you when he notices you. A genuine smile, that makes you smile equally. A pure wave of happiness wraps your body and you wish you could jump in his arms. Once again, a little word with huge meaning starting with 'L' pops in your mind and warms your heart.
"What are you doing here?" You ask him, trying to not sound as cheerful as you are
"To see you"
The simple but so sweet respond attacks your heart. It should be illegal to be such a flirt.
"I was thinking I could cook for you"
"Oh, you know how to cook?" You tease him
"Are you questioning my cooking skills?" He replies, a brow lifting up suspiciously
Jungkook's smile is so pretty. When he smiles, he looks like the happiest man alive and, oddly, seeing him happy makes you happy too. You realize that you want to make him happy.
"Prove me wrong then" You say, opening his car door.
———
You didn't know what to expect from Jungkook's apartment but it surely looks like him: a big living room with a huge TV screen, a large black leather couch, some paintings on the walls ; a modern open kitchen and a dark wood diner table making the transition between the cooking area and the living room. You see some photos of him, his family and his friends. It's like Jungkook has brought all his memories from his brain and materialized it into his place. You feel good here, at peace, like in a cocoon, protected from the outside world. It's the same feeling that when he wraps his arms around your frame.
As Jungkook washes his hands with soap in the kitchen sink, he speaks up:
"Do you want some ramyeon?"
You immediately burst into laugher and Jungkook follows you.
"I mean, real ramyeon but if you want that, I will love it too"
"Real ramyeon is okay" You say, blushing
Jungkook starts boiling water in a saucepan and grabs two packs of Shin Ramyun, the less spicy ones after you told him that you were sensitive. It doesn't take long for the noodles to be ready and you two sit down at the dinner table.
The conversation goes smoothly. You talk about you two, your childhoods, the things you like and don't like. You just get to know each other. Despite being unlabeled, it looks like the beginning of a relationship. Few memories of how it started with your ex-boyfriends come back to you and you realize that what you are leaving now with Jungkook is like that, but way better because you get along on so many things. You laugh at the same jokes, you are upset about the same things, you care about the same subjects. However, you don't want to rush things. It's been a long time since you were in a relationship and you want to take your time. You don't have to put a name on what you and Jungkook are.
"Do you have nicknames?" You ask him at some point
"Actually, I have a lot of them: JK, Kook, Kookie" He pauses and a sparkle of playfulness brightens his doe eyes "Daddy..."
"Jungkook!" You blush and choke at the same time, which makes him laugh.
"You can call me whatever you want"
"What's your favorite nickname? And don't say Daddy" You ask him, genuinely wanting to call him by a name he likes
Jungkook takes the time to think and then, gets a tiny closer to you. When he talks back, his voice is way deeper and you feel a change in the air around you.
"Call me yours"
You don't understand what happens next because in just one second, your lips are on Jungkook's. He grabs your waist to pull you closer, basically putting you on his laps. Your hands are in his smooth, long hair. Your kiss is messy, eager and your panties gets quickly soaked. Then, Jungkook pulls you up and leans you on the table, the tableware pushed aside carelessly. The cold and hard material in your back contrast with the fire in your body and the softness of Jungkook's lips on your neck. His hands struggle to unbutton your pale yellow blouse and he is too impatient to wait. With a sharp movement, he pulls over both sides, causing all the little buttons to pop and fall around you.
"Jungkook!" You scold him
"I'll buy you a new one"
He even seems amused and kisses your breasts. It's enough for you to forget about the ripped clothes. Jungkook sneaks a hand on your back and undoes your bra. He quickly takes off both your messed up blouse and your bra. Then, he cups your boobs with his large and warm palms and takes the time to admire your picked nipples - caused by the cold air on your burning skin and your horniness. His mouth dives onto your nipples and he rolls his tongue around it, sucks on it and gently bites it. The simulation of this sensitive zone causes you to moan his name. You tell him to take off his shirt - honestly, who will say no to sneak on his perfect body?
You flick his firm chest and abs. He is way too handsome with no shirt on. But Jungkook doesn't give you too much time to enjoy the show because he unzips your black slacks and slides them down with your panties. Completely naked, you feel his glaze on you and you blush when he licks his lips, ready to eat you out.
"You are so beautiful" He whispers before he kneels down to kiss your pussy.
A choked whimper escapes your mouth. Feeling Jungkook's lips on you, and especially on your wet pussy, is electrifying. A wave of arousal washes over your body. He eats you out like a starved man. You feel your juice mixed with his saliva dripping down to your ass and your pussy clenches on nothing until Jungkook hears your silenced prayers and enters you with two fingers.
"Oh my god!" You exclaim at the sudden and delightful stretch
"I love how tight you are, babe"
You barely hear his voice because his mouth is glued to your clit but the pet name drives you crazy. You're losing your head, trying to grip the corner of the table not to lose your sanity under these perfect tongue flicks. Jungkook enhances the pace of his fingers, hitting your g-spot every time. You can't take it any longer and you feel your orgasm building up in your body so fast that you can't even tell Jungkook - not that he needs you to speak because your walls around his fingers getting tighter tell enough. You scream his name when you reach your climax, spams of pleasure all over your body.
You look literally fucked up and it's what Jungkook wanted. Seeing and even feeling your pleasure makes him horny. He can feel his hard cock completely squeezed in his pants, it's uncomfortable. You naked is a view he wishes to see everyday. At this thought, he can't help but caressing his dick through the fabric of his clothes and he kisses your inner thighs, he even bites them gently. The contact of his teeth on your sensitive skin makes you flinch. He knows damn well how to use his pretty mouth... He ends up sucking on your inner thigh skin to leave a mark. He loves thinking that you're his, even if it's just for a moment. His possessiveness doesn't just turn him on, it does the same to you. Someway, you are proud he wants you the same way you want him, and you do want to be his. And you want him to be yours.
You are out of breathe, slowly reaching down on Earth after being beyond clouds. You don't think straight and that's why your mouth speaks without consulting your brain.
"I want you" You hear your raspy post-orgasm voice says
Jungkook kisses you, some of your juice mixing in your mouth with your and his salivas. He leaves you just a few seconds and comes back with a metallic square packet in his hand.
"Are you sure?" He asks you
"Yes"
You have no doubt. You want Jungkook. You want to feel the closest you can, you want to feel him in you.
He kisses you, more gently than before, almost in a romantic way, before taking off his pants and underwear. The sight cuts your breathe: his cock is already hard. You can't deny that a new wave of wetness shakes your pussy. You wonder how stretching will his thick length be, you know he will fill you completely.
He puts the condom on, and gives himself a few pumps before placing his body closer to yours, right between your opened legs. The few seconds you have to wait to feel him are like torture. The emptiness of your pussy and the beautiful view of his hard cock so close to you makes you shiver in an impatient horniness. You're losing your mind, but it's even worse when Jungkook takes his length and slides upon your dripping pussy. You moan and then whine in pleasure when you feel it rubbing your swollen clit, causing a spam in all your body. His hard cock on your sensitive bud is the most delightful thing in the whole world.
"Jungkook, please" You beg
Once again, you don't know how much you are turning him on with your plea. "What a good girl", he thinks when he finally enters you. Slowly. Making you feel each inch stretching you and causing your mouth to open. It's so big, painful. It's so good. You don't really know if it's his cock or the realization of him filling you up but you are, once again, on the edge of your orgasm. However, you want this delightful sin to last as long as possible. That's why, when he is deep inside you, all his thick dick swallowed by your cunt, you put a hand on his firm abs to stop him from moving. You need to control yourself and take deep breathes. He is standing up, having the greatest view of your entire perfect body. Even though his position makes him dominant, on the inside, you are shaking everything in Jungkook. You could ask him anything, he would say 'yes'.
"You're so good" Jungkook says in a raspy voice before pecking you, this small gesture squeezes your heart with sweetness
When you begin to whimper from the lack of the now needed sliding, Jungkook gets the message and starts bumping. He begins quite slow but enhances the pace at each single bang. Your breasts bounces at the same rhythm and it's a call for him to grab your boob with his tattooed hand. His skin is even hotter than yours and the feeling is so damn good. His touch is like a delicious burn on your skin. His left hand keeps you in place while he penetrates you again and again. He enters you with all his length each time, hitting your g-spot. The pace is the perfect one: just providing the good amount of pain before it's unbearable. But what is unbearable is the arousal growing even bigger in your body.
"Oh my fucking god!"
"You're taking me so good, Y/N. So fucking perfect"
His head spins by the amount of pleasure. It's the pleasure of stretching your tight pussy but also of being the one in you. He keeps telling to himself how beautiful you are and how perfect your pussy feels around his cock, just like you were made for him. He wants each pounding to remind you that, at this moment, you're his and he's yours. There is nothing in the world but your two bodies being one.
He leans down to kiss you messily. You grab his hair and moan his name in his mouth. How can you survive so much pleasure? It's not just his perfect cock, Jungkook exactly knows how to move. He seems to know what you like, what you want and he gives it to you at the exact right time. That's why it's the best, best, best sex in your life.
"Are you so wet just for me?" His voice is full of cockiness and it makes you crazy, even his possessiveness creates a wave of arousal between your legs and makes your walls clench around him. "Answer me" He orders, giving a slap on the side of your ass, tightening your pussy even more and Jungkook mentally notes that you like that.
"Yes! Yes!" You repeat the only words you manage to say
"You're such a good girl" You can hear his smirk in his breathless voice, and it's fucking hot
You are so close, his cock stretching and pounding your dripping cunt. Jungkook feels your pussy clenching and he smirks. His inked hand leaves your breast to rub your clit, tightening your walls even more. It begins to be hard for him to enter you smoothly when you're so tight.
"Oh my god, Jungkook!" You moan, fighting to keep your eyes open just to see his face full of horniness and his messy-fuck hair sticked on his forehead. He is so perfect, so handsome. His puffy lips are slightly open and you swear that when he looks into your eyes, you can see his soul for a second.
"So fucking tight" He says with his jaws clenched, trying to not cum before you "Cum for me, babe. Cum around my cock"
His puzzling possessiveness towards you pushes him to fuck you harder. Eyes closed by the overwhelming wave of arousal, you have no idea that Jungkook is still watching you. So beautiful with your face torn by pleasure. He wishes to be the only one to witness it, the only one to provide you such an orgasm. And in fact, you've never cummed this hard. You get choked up, unable to make any noise, when you feel the most alive than you've ever felt - you don't even know if you're still on Earth - but Jungkook keeps fucking you through your orgasm. The overstimulation is almost too painful. Almost.
"Please, please" You groan
You don't know if it's for him to stop, to continue or to urge him to feel how good cumming right now is. Anyway, just a few poundings are enough for Jungkook after your little begging to fill the condom.
You are both panting and sweaty. Jungkook almost collapses on you and your burning skins melt into each other's. You feel so... overwhelmed. You don't even know what you're feeling right now except that you want to feel him closer. Not physically because you can't be closer than that - especially when Jungkook is still inside you - but emotionally. Your shaky hands - caused by the orgasms or your emotion - caresses his sticky hair. Jungkook throws his strong arms around you and rests his head on your breast, listening to your pounding heart. The feeling of your fingers playing with his black strands is soothing, he likes it. No, he loves it. He has never felt like this, in complete peace. He knows he is where he is to be.
You're happy Jungkook can't see your face because two big tears escape your eyes for an indeterminate reason. Well, actually, deep down, you know the reason but you're not ready to accept it just yet. Thankfully, you have time to dry your eyes before Jungkook lifts his pretty head and kisses you. A real, beautiful, perfect kiss. A kiss that says everything, every truth of the world and even more. Or is it your imagination because of your foggy post-amazing-orgasm brain?
Jungkook straightens up slowly and pulls out from you. The void between your legs is unpleasant, like a piece of you is missing. He grabs your hand to help to get off the table. Your weak and shaky legs abandon you but Jungkook's quick reflexes prevent you from hitting the ground.
"Wooh, easy cowboy" He laughs, kissing your temples
Why does he have to be so cute right now? Your legs are not the only part of your body to be weak at this moment: your heart is too. And his bunny smile, his adorable doe eyes and his scrunched nose are a huge threat.
You try to push this thoughts away and concentrate on stabilizing yourself. When you feel like you won't directly drop, you carefully let go of Jungkook's support.
"I should go take a shower" You say with a still raspy voice
"Sure, I'll give you a towel. And a t-shirt" He tells you playfully, glancing at your yellow once blouse.
You try to clean yourself quickly to give way to Jungkook but you still take the time to appreciate the smell of his body wash. It's not the usual strong and manly scent but a sophisticate amber and lemony fragrance. You realize it's perfect for Jungkook: mannish but soft at the same time. Okay, your brain is definitely not working well if you think his body wash is a mirror for his personality...
Out of the bathroom with the clean oversize black t-shirt and a pair of boxers that Jungkook gave you, you see him cleaning the diner table dressed only with his underwear. The mesmerizing view makes you blush. You don't say anything to enjoy the show a little longer. But Jungkook eventually notices you and gives you a genuine smile.
"You can choose a movie while I go shower, if you want"
He says that so naturally. Does that mean he expects you to stay over? Not that you complain but last time he left, so you kind of supposed you'd have to leave too. You are in fact really happy to stay and to spend more time with Jungkook after this intimate moment. Does he feel like something changed too? It was not only the sex but the few minutes after, while you were pressed against each other. You know what aftercare is but it was more than that.
———
"What are you doing this weekend?" Jungkook asks you
The movie has been going on for almost a hour now. You were surprised - but so happy - when Jungkook sat next to you and pulled closer, his arm around your shoulders. The fact that you smelled the same kind of made your heart beat faster. Silly, you thought. It was so good that you didn't want to think it was anything more than after-sex moment because if Jungkook decided to not see you again, you knew it would hurt you.
But now, he is asking for this weekend. So maybe, just maybe, he wants to see you again. Maybe to start something more serious?
"I have a thing Saturday. But I'm free Friday night and Sunday" You try to control your smile. "What about you?"
"I was thinking we could go to the Lotte aquarium. Have you been there?"
"Never" You answer, remembering that Suzi and you always talked about visiting it but always ended up doing something else. "I'd love to go"
You bite your lower lip to prevent you from asking "Is it a date?".
"Great" Jungkook smiles at you with his cute bunny smile, relieved that you agreed to go out with him. "What are your plans for Saturday, if it's okay for me to ask?"
"One of my friends is graduating from high school"
"You have young friends!" He jokes
"Yah, I'm not that old! You, on the other hand, can't say the same" You tease and he looks falsely offended
"Come on, Y/N, I'm like three years older"
You don't really think before kissing Jungkook. It's only when you pull your lips apart that you realize that you got carried away by the flirty situation and that you might have crossed a line.
Seeing the panic in your eyes, Jungkook reassures you by kissing you. Himself can't get enough of your pretty lips. Being with you, watching a movie, having you in his arms seems so natural to him. As it's always have been like that. He doesn't know why, and he doesn't even try to understand. He just wants to enjoy it.
And he does. All night. You sleeping in his bed is a blessing, almost a dream. That's why he wraps your body with an arm: he makes sure that you won't disappear. He can't deny that this fear comes with old demons that he tries to push away.
———
"Jongseob!" You scream your friend's name like a proud mom
He is wearing his high school uniform and, something unusual, he has styled his caramel hair - and yes, he has been punished for dying his hair. However, you can't yell at him when he is this cute.
"Noona!"
He immediately jumps at you and you notice that he has grown since the last time you saw him a few month ago.
"I'm so, so proud of you" You tell him, hugging him tightly. "I have something for you"
Jongseob grabs the bag you hand him and takes a look. His almond eyes sparkles and his lovely smile gets bigger. He looks genuinely happy to discover the new video game he told you about and a full box of donuts from your favorite coffee shop.
You are moved to see him happy. It's a drastic change from your first encounter and each time you think about it, your heart is painfully squeezed. It was three years ago. Suzi had sent you a text to tell you that she would be late. Grumbling, you decided to start shopping for the weekend party without her. You were strolling in Myeongdong when you heard some strange noises coming from a narrowed alley. A small group of high schoolers were having fun. Or that's what you thought at first. But watching carefully, you noticed that four of them were, indeed having fun from bullying a younger boy. You felt panicked, sad and angry. You didn't think a second before rushing toward them and yelling at them. They might have think you were crazy.
"If you touch him again, I swear to God that I will make you regret being born" You told them
It was not really your threat but the fading amusement that made them leave. When you turned around, you saw this scared but cute boy. You hugged him tightly and told him that he'd never be alone again. After that, you both sat at your now favorite coffee and you payed him a donut. Since then, Jongseob is like your little brother. You really, purely love each other. And you are so, so proud of him: he is more confident now and he graduates with special mention.
You can see in Jongseob's eyes that he is also thinking about your first encounter. Both of you have watery eyes now. He's never told you that he thinks you're his guardian angel. You helped him so much that he made a promise to himself: he will work hard and will give everything you want. He will take care of you the same way you took care of him. You're the person who knows him the most, like a big sister, his Noona.
You let him go join his classmates and you sit on the bleachers to follow the graduation. Pride brightens your eyes and warms your heart. When the headmaster calls 'Kim Jongseob', he stands up, takes his diploma and looks for you in the crowd. When his eyes meet yours, he waves at you with his certificate, a perfect sign of success after all he's been through.
"Noona, I'm not a kid anymore" Jongseob complains when you hand him a hot chocolate
You roll your eyes. After the ceremony, you invited him at the coffee shop and ordered the usual: a hot chocolate for Jongseob, a latte for you and two glazed lemon donuts - you told him to bring back home the ones you gave him earlier.
"Yah! It's not because you're not in high school anymore that you can't drink hot chocolate. Come on, I know you love it"
With a sigh, Jongseob gives up the protest and takes a sip. The sweet flavor makes him forget why he wanted anything else.
"I'm so proud of you"
"Stop! You said that a hundred times today"
"I know but it's true"
You can't control your emotion. Like you said earlier, you look like a proud mom and you are not going to be sorry for that. Moreover, you know that Jongseob is secretly happy to know how you feel about him, his own parents are not very supportive.
Jongseob's phone rings and he immediately jumps on it. He reads the text, blushes and answers. You squint and wait for him to put down the device. Jongseob notices the suspicious and amused expression on your face.
"What?" He asks, blushing harder
"Don't you have something to tell me?" You take a sip of your latte, trying to act detached while you're dying to know all the details
"There is this girl, Jiwon, she is so pretty and nice. We-we talk, that's all"
"You like her?"
"I-I think"
Jongseob is too cute when he is shy. He is a good guy, you have no doubt that Jiwon will see it too. You are also happy that he found someone, a friend, to talk to. After being bullied, it was hard for him to trust other people and you were the only one he talked to. But you have noticed a slight change in him: he is more open to others and, even if they can't be described as 'friends', he spends some time with them.
"What about you, Noona?"
"There is this guy, Jungkook, he is so pretty and nice" You tease him and Jongseob gently slaps your arm to make you stop. "I'm kidding! But for real, there is a guy. I don't really know what we are"
Actually, you are glad to talk about Jungkook to someone. You know you can talk to Suzi but she is too implicated so Jongseob can help you see things differently, especially when he doesn't know Jungkook.
"What would you like you two to be?"
It's a simple question. And yet, you never thought about it. When you're with Jungkook, you feel so good. He makes you happy, alive and it's more than just sex. The physical attraction you've had for him for months became something deeper when you started spending time with him. It's also scary how such a short time was enough for your heart and your brain to be full of Jungkook.
"I... want him" You whisper "I feel alive when I'm with him. I don't know how to explain but I want to be with him"
"What are you wanting for?"
You look at Jongseob with a surprised and confused look. He looks so confident - you don't know that it's thank to you that he can be.
"Go tell him. You have nothing to loose. And honestly, if this Jungkook guy doesn't want to be with you, he sucks"
Jongseob's cute smile gives you courage. He gives you a 'go girl!' look. You grab you bag, kiss Jongseob on his chubby cheek and waves him goodbye.
———
The bus ride allowed you to organize your speech. You feel so fucking stressed. Your heart beats loudly in your chest. You know that it's not easy to lay yourself bare and confess your feelings but you also know that you shared something real with Jungkook. You can't be the only one to feel this way, he must feel it too.
You arrive at the closest bus stop to Jungkook's. You place your hand on your crazy beating heart and take a deep breathe. It's okay, nothing can go wrong. You walk to his building and you are surprised to see him, standing up next to his Mercedes. You are ready to call him out but you throat goes dry when you see a girl hugging him.
What the hell?
You are close enough to hear them talking. But this can't be happening. It's all a misunderstanding, like in movies. The girl took him for someone else, or Jungkook is going to push her away. But no. The ground is opening under your feet, swallowing you. However, it's even more painful when you hear what they are saying.
"Kookie, I need you" The girl says in Jungkook's chest
"I'm here, I'm not leaving you"
Each word coming from his mouth is a dragger in your broken heart.
He wraps his arms around the fragile girl's body, an awful reminder that he's done the exact same thing to you just a few days ago.
"I love you" She says
Please, don't. Don't say it.
"I love you too"
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#bts#bts fanfic#bts smut#bts jungkook#bangtan sonyeondan#jeon jungkook#jjk#jjk x reader#jungkook#jjk smut#smut#kpop smut#female reader#x reader
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Hi everypony!
My kofi is ko-fi.com/captainzigo if you enjoy my art, consider leaving me a tip! this is otherwise entirely a labor of love so,,,
you can also send a request with your tip! but if you choose to do so, please read the disclaimer later on in this post**
my non-art blog, where i accept asks is @snapewife-divorce-lawyer and my reblog-spam blog is @3amgaypotion also i am on bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/captainzigo.bsky.social
that's a bunch of pictures of my oc(/ponysona) Prickly Pear. she's a cowgirl
Frequent/noteworthy questions below the break
**on donations made to me:
i still dont take commissions currently, but if you send a request with a donation, there's a 99% chance i'll do it. and that remaining 1% i'll probably just ask you for a different request. if you send me a request with a donation you are not sending me a commision. you are making a donation, and i might do you a favor as a result. you do not own the resulting art. and I am under no obligation to complete it or to do it in the way that you like. you do not need to make a donation in order to make a request. i talk more about it here
hello mutuals!
If you are a mutual, DM me for an invite to discord server and subsequently to minecraft server
on sending me asks:
any asks you send me should be like Strongbad emails. one paragraph. no attachments. unless you are sending me refs.
in any interactions, please keep in mind that i am a stranger on the internet and act accordingly.
unless I have explicitly said otherwise, you can safely assume that I do not count you amongst my friends. it is nothing personal, it is in fact the opposite.
why am i like this?
i am autistic. i say this because representation matters, but also because i would like to ask that you please be very frank with me. i don't even really need your patience. just say what you mean and we will get along fine.
can you draw my ocs?
you most certainly can draw any of my ocs. i'd love that acually. tag me
on (re)posting my art:
do not post my art on other platforms. do not repost my art period. I don't really exist on other platforms since i deleted Twitter. So if you see my stuff on other platforms, it's not me. except for my bluesky.
transformative works are obviously allowed, at least here in america where i live. but if you want my blessing, please keep them SFW, and try to keep the spirit of the original artwork
is my blog SFW?
im in my twenties. i keep my blog SFW (as i define it) as a strict rule.
i do not consider the fact that sex exists, that some people enjoy it, or some innuendo to be NSFW. i also do not consider swearing, even as tho a sailor might, to be NSFW.
are NSFW interactions ok?
in short: no. while i have no aversion to to that sort of thing, and often actually enjoy it, i keep this blog SFW. the intention behind my art is to be SFW even when it might be skirting the line. in general, and especially, specifically with mlp, i do not wish to have NSFW interactions on the internet. please respect this boundary.
on shipping:
in my opinion, all romance real or fictional should be between people who are similar in age, doing age appropriate things, not closely related, and all with mutual consent. i am not interested in witnessing or interacting with anything outside of these parameters.
on my blue hair and pronouns:
i am a trans woman. i am also bisexual. i am also poly and demi since im listing things. i am out online becasue i know how important it is to know that you aren't alone.
do i take constructive criticism?
NO 🖕👹🖕 FUCK YOU!!!!!!! GET BLOCKED IDIOT!! unless you are a marginalized person who feels i have unintentionally made you uncomfortable somehow with my art or otherwise. in that case i am sorry and you do me a great favor by calling me out. OTHERWISE FUCK YOU DUMBASS IF YOU DONT LIKE MY ART GO DRAW YOUR OWN 🖕🖕🖕🖕
“i hate bronies”…
i don't necessarily hate you if you self identify with that label. i like to make myself off-putting to keep creeps away. i talk about it more in this post: https://www.tumblr.com/captainzigo/744131513208176640/when-i-say-i-hate-bronies-in-my-header-its
brony?
i don't hold a lot of nostalgia for old brony stuff. infact it's quite the opposite. i was a child when the show came out, and more than that i was a girl. i am not a brony.
do i like g5?
i like all generations of mip including the new stuff. gen 4 is just the one i grew up with
why is my header aurora, bori and alice from the best gift ever?
well that would be because i hate them like a mother hates a child. like the sun hates the moon. like sickly victorian child hates the slightest morsel of bread.
on flurryheart:
i often draw stuff about cozy glow x flurry heart. this is with the understanding that cozy glow spends about a decade turned to stone. nullifying the age gap.
🤓☝️ i think you mean effect, not affect
i am dyslexic. i spell stuff wrong all the time and i type weird. please don't bother correcting me. wooptydoo your brain is wired normally. sending you a medal.
on my username:
i've had the same username since i debuted on the internet. zigo is the name of an oc i made that i dont really talk much about anymore. zigo is a fine enough nickname, and at least one person calls me that irl.
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thanks for complying with my request sir!! anyway can i ask for the same headcanons but this time for hsr? namely for welt, jepard, dan heng, jin yuan ?? 🥺🫠💞
❀Sexual headcanons about Welt, Gepard, Dan Heng and Jing Yuan❀
DNI: minors.
!!Warnings: hair pulling, pet play, praise/humalitation, romantic, play with chest, handcuffs, bondage, breeding kink, oral sex, sex in the bathroom and forest, semi public sex, mirror sex, corsets (lol).
Welt.
Oh, Mother of God... I don't know who he is. He will probably be whatever you want. Dominant? Certainly. Submissive? Also good. But I guess he's more on the submissive side.
He is a little conservative in his views, so he likes more vanilla sex. But he absolutely doesn't mind trying something new and trying it if that's what you want.
Very romantic man! He loves to make you sexual surprises, just like from some popular romantic and erotic films or books.
He loves to praise you. Of course, he is pleased if you also praise him, he appreciates it very much and it excites him. But there's something more to him praising you. It excites him insanely, especially if you somehow react to his words.
Bondage kink~. I'm sure he would gladly be bound for you and let you do with him whatever your heart desires. Moreover, it will look wonderful in a bound state~.
He is quiet in bed. Sighs, heavy breathing, rare quiet moans and whines, but nothing more.
He has sensitive nipples (I've seen too many art, you won't convince me otherwise). So his nipples quickly become hard from almost any touch and movement, which makes him moan louder than usual.
I'm pretty sure he's never been bottom. So he was very interested in this experience and when he finally felt your cock in him... He immediately came from the sensation with a loud moan, which surprised the two of you.
He loves to hold hands during sex! It's so sweet and romantic, given that he likes the slower and more gentle pace, it makes the process even more enjoyable for him.
He is an adult male, so most likely he may have a breeding kink. He realizes that he won't get pregnant. But ... It's not bad to imagine, it's not bad not to dream, my dears.
He has good eyes, sorry, they are so beautiful (God, I admire them every day). And since he's sensitive, considering you're his first partner in his role as a bottom, he often starts rolling his eyes with a low moan—. I'm a simp, sorry.
He's insanely tired, so give him a massage sometime, starting gently on his torso and then taking it to something sexier, that'll probably relax him the best. Especially if it will be in the bathroom, in hot water and next to you.
Gepard.
Sub. Most submissive sub. He's just so obedient and timid and wonderful, just like a kitten. He's also probably a virgin, but I'm not sure about that.
Ahem, this brings me to the idea of pet play. Well, he's a Gepard anyway, so... He's a big cat, but unlike a cat, he's very obedient... And doesn't mind at all if you put him on a leash, hehe.
Pull him by his hair. By those beautiful blonde hair, he will moan at the top of his lungs with his beautiful and hot voice.
Kink for praise, especially if it somehow concerns him. For example, his muscular and lean body, pretty face, or his actions or words in relation to you (or to himself, if you want a show, hehe).
He's shy, like, very shy. He was focused all his life on preparing for the army, that he did not think about any romance or anything like that.
Everything you bring to his life is so new, but so interesting! So he is more than willing to try any of your ideas, even the most disgusting and perverted ones. Although some, like threesome or something like that, I suppose he will refuse. He wouldn't want anyone else involved in this.
Sex in the alleys~. Especially during his breaks or patrols. If you pull him into the alley at this time and quickly do what you want there, Mr. will come out of there afterwards completely shabby, but with such a blissful expression on his face, as if he had just been blessed by God himself.
He has great stamina, for obvious reasons. Like, really big. If you have too, then he is at your service, you can have fun with him until your stamina runs out.
I guess he likes to please you. Well, that is, oral sex, of course. He will gladly suck you off if you so wish or even if you do not wish. He just may have such a mood and desire.
A kind of kink for humiliation? He doesn't like humiliation as such, but... You know, he's a captain after all, and he kind of has to be such a cold, calculating man. But, if you tell him to say or do anything that goes against that description, it will be so humiliating and hot for him. Something like, for example, feminization or light humiliation.
An addition to the past is also if you put him in front of a mirror. And you will force him to look at his expression while you do something with him.
Dan Heng.
He is probably a sub. I just see him as such, all the cold guys in my mind are definitely submissive in one way or another. But at the same time, he will be the dominant if you want, but he will not offer it himself. He's a virgin, given his past, this shouldn't come as a surprise.
Just like Welt, he is quite quiet in bed, but he is talkative. That is, he quietly groans, whines, whimpers, breathes quickly and speaks, and this all happens often, but quietly, obviously.
Prefers soft sex rather than rough. He likes to be praised for his actions, calling him a good boy, but he never says it.
Although he also doesn't mind being humiliated if you're into that sort of thing. But still praise him sometimes, he needs it :(.
He loves to ride you. He just really likes the feeling of your cock going straight into him while he grabs your chest/shoulders/belly and so on. And he loves looking at your face with a look of pleasure underneath.
Handcuffs. Fuck, Dan Heng is in handcuffs, this is a divine sight. His hands are behind his back or above his head, handcuffed, constantly rattling from the sound of metal from each other, mixed with his moans and sobs...
Archives~. Well, or his bedroom, lol. While he is adding something to the database, approach him discreetly and take him right there and then, it will be one of the most intense orgasms that he has ever experienced.
Loves hickeys and bites on his body! It is on the body, where no one except you will see it. His thighs, torso, arms and so on. He just loves to share something so intimate with you that only the two of you know about.
He loves sex in nature. There is something so intimate and loving when you fuck, for example, in a forest or a glade and so on. Especially if it happens at a later time.
(Spoilers for the 1.2 main story!) His Imbibitor Lunae form... His pretty horns are just pulling, dammit. I want to fuck him by pulling those wonderful horns, making him arch his back with a moan and fuck... This man so hot :(.
I once read that the best cure after having a nightmare is oral sex (Although this is obviously nonsense, I suppose...). But you imagine it with him... He wakes up in the middle of the night when he once again dreams of a sexy man with boobs, heavier than watermelons, who wants to kill him and you gently suck him off, gradually calming him down.
Jing Yuan.
He... I don't know, it's a tough decision, really. I believe he is a switch, more leaning towards the dominant side, but again I'm not sure about that.
Who really has experience is him... After all, how fucking old is he? Nobody knows this, so we can only guess.
His corset is ಥ_ಥ. Fuck, I love men in corsets, and men in general. But! Imagine~. How do you fuck him while pulling on that corset while pressing on the bulge in his stomach while he grabs onto anything~.
His hair—. (Don't say you've never been tangled in his hair.) He just loves when you pull on those wonderful, long, snow-white hair. Especially when you pull that ponytail over your arm and fuck him like that.
He prefers a rougher and edgier tempo, as well as sex in general, more rough and edgy. Although of course, slowly and carefully is also good for him!
He loves missionary, or missionary-like positions in one way or another, because he loves to put his legs around your waist while you thrust into him.
Random headcanon, but ever since there was a meme about him being a literal Disney princess because of the amount of animals and birds that surrounds him, then imagine that you are fucking, and a finch sits on him and looks at all this, breaking all its worldview.
He loves kissing during sex, and kissing in general. Especially deep kisses, with tongues and all! He'll never miss a chance to kiss you like that, even if he has to do 360 degrees, he'll do it.
Squeeze his hands over his head. It doesn't even matter if one of your arms can't wrap around his two. Just do it. He finds something insanely sexy and funny about your display of dominance.
#dom male reader#seme male reader#top male reader#a!writes.#sub character#hsr x male reader#honkai star rail x male reader#welt x male reader#gepard x male reader#jing yuan x male reader#dan heng x male reader#sub hsr#sub honkai star rail#hsr smut#honkai star rail smut#welt x reader#gepard x reader#dan Heng x reader#jing Yuan x reader#🥀a!praise kink#🥀a!humiliation#🥀a!hair pulling#🥀a!breeding kink#🥀a!dom/sub#🥀a!semi public#🥀a!riding
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Can I Stay? (A Baekhyun Story) Part 22 [FINAL]
Pairing: You x Baekhyun
Rating: M
Word Count: 13.9k
Warnings: toilet humor. Over consumption of alcohol.
Author’s note: Thank you so so so so much for staying with me throughout this story! I can’t believe it’s over. I’ll cry forever.
A romance between two adults with an unspecified age difference between them, an English story that uses the word Noona for lack of another word in English that carries the same feeling, if you don’t like this, then don’t read this story.
Can I Stay? Masterlist
Tag: @his-mochi-cheeks
You stood before the mirror scrutinizing your own reflection for any obvious evidence of this forbidden act you’d just taken part in.
Somewhere within the stall, Baekhyun had been busy with cleaning up and putting himself back together; just as you had done moments earlier. You heard the soft grunts and slightly annoyed grumbles coming from behind that closed door, “—a bathroom — of all places — we aren’t kids hiding from our parents.”
“Uhh…” he called out in a low voice. “I gotta take a piss.” There was just a touch of a slur in his syllables, “you don't mind, do you?” His question was mostly mumbled, but you heard the clank as he lifted the toilet seat; not waiting for your response.
“I think we are well beyond that sort of modesty, Baekhyun.”
“Are we?” You heard the stream hit the water in the bowl. “At least we have that.”
You leaned in closer to the mirror and touched over the dark red spot on your neck; pulling your own hair over the skin in an attempt to hide it.
Whenever you moved, so did your hair and the hickey showed up again. You reached for your small bag, remembering the touch-up makeup you’d brought with you. You tried your best with it, but the spot he’d made with his teeth would be one of his more lasting works. You could practically see all of his frustration from this evening with the teeth marks he’d left in your skin.
The toilet flushed as the stall door pushed open and Baekhyun emerged still zipping up and fastening his belt buckle.
“You know, I have a key to the penthouse in my pocket right now but you wanted to fuck dirty in a satellite bathroom on the third floor.” You heard hints of sarcasm. He was washing his hands. He was lifting his collar and tying his necktie, looking into the mirror as he re-did everything your filthy rendezvous had undone. His fingers flew up to the top of his head and he coiffed his remarkably still perfectly styled brown hair.
You rested a hip against the bathroom countertop and leaned your head against the wall beside the light switch, feeling just a tad dizzy from the copious amounts of alcohol you still had in your system but doing your best to focus on the many clues about something this man was haphazardly tossing in your direction.
You were having a bit of trouble gauging his mood. He seemed to be acting just a little bit prickly. It didn't feel like he was just drunk, this was something else. Leftover frustrations from being teased all night perhaps? A side effect from the three-hour boner? Was this pampered prince too good for kinky bathroom sex? As far as bathrooms went, this was a pretty nice one. There were warmed, rolled-up hand towels in wooden trays from IKEA, tasteful art hung on the walls, and on the other end, faceted mirrors lined the wall there that had given you a multi-angle view of what you looked like being fucked by your secret boyfriend. There was some sort of a fragrance that was released on a timer up in the corner. You’d heard the device squirt at least once while you’d been in here and now it didn't even smell like sex anymore. And it wasn’t as if you’d dragged him in here. He walked over here himself. Hell, he probably sprinted.
You watched his pretty side profile in silence as he did things like run a fingertip over his eyelid; wiping something imaginary there, or run his hand below his pouty pink bottom lip all while looking into the mirror at his own stunning reflection.
His eyes were blinking and he was not making any grand gestures or rushed movements in your direction and after a few breaths in and out and after a few more, quite excessive smoothing motions with the palms of his hands over his already neatly tucked shirt, he moved again to tug at his belt buckle, then moved his fingertips toward his own necktie that he pulled with an artists precision into about as straight a line as humanly possible and you were watching him with a building sensation that this man was, very obviously bothered by something you had, or hadn’t done.
”Baekhyun?” you said with all of your remaining unasked questions flipping up the inflection at the end of his name.
He inhaled a breath and only looked into his own eyes, blinking them slowly once. Then twice. On this third blink his eyes opened and his eyelids fluttered just enough to show you how much he was holding himself in a carefully barely controlled state. He was deliberate with it — with making a point to avoid your eyes entirely.
This pretty man had settled himself into a fit.
You were sure it wasn’t the sex from earlier. The sex had been amazing. He had liked it, you were sure of it by his giddy excitement at having his very own sex tape saved into a secret, password protected folder in his phone. He’d even made it a point to disable any sort of cloud back-ups that might have inadvertently saved it anywhere else. He’d gone through big gestures of saving yours in the same way. Double locked and very strong password protected. Some acronym of some code sentence he’d made up on the spot and you hoped to God you’d both still be able to remember it when you sobered up.
No, no, this was something else; something you simply could not ignore and from beside him on the countertop you could see the occasional notification popping up on his cell phone screen. It had been placed on silent but it was very much alive and very active. From where you stood, you could see the occasional pop-up message telling him he had been receiving text messages and they seemed to come one after another in rapid succession. Some even at the same time.
You pushed away from the counter and took a few steps; feeling either too drunk or too entitled to look away from his phone screen and in the mirror you caught the movement of his eyes as he watched you approach his phone. It was very active. You saw names popping up again and again. Summaries of text messages filled with laughter and images displayed in tiny thumbnails.
“What is all that?” You peered down at it and heard a slow sigh come from deep within your boyfriend’s chest.
“Group chat,”he said as he reached a finger out and touched his phone screen, “the guys,” not bothering to move the phone away from you or conceal it in any way; instead, he was reaching out unlock it, to bring it to the forefront of your vision so show you everything and to bring all of this nonsense up for you to see. “They’re making jokes and memes…to tease me…about you.”
The chat moved quickly. Tons of laughter and childish ribbing at his expense. An occasional picture with words written on it. You saw an image of a weeping man pulled deep down into the throes of despair coupled with some words embedded in the picture about a high-five from the love of your life followed by more raucous laughter from several people who all talked at once. An occasional question directed right to Baekhyun asking about where he even disappeared to. Someone saying he was off crying in a corner. One more noticing that you had vanished as well and you crossed your arms over your chest knowing deep down that the longer you both stayed gone at the same time, the more suspicions amongst your friends and co-workers would grow.
There was no more delaying it. You both knew it. This desperate need you both had succumbed to had been temporarily satisfied and unless you wanted those suspicions to become rumors and those rumors to be backed up with coincidences or worse, facts you both needed to come up with your next move so you could rejoin the others at the party and it really needed to happen sooner rather than later.
Something about his quiet observation of your face and the way he kept his tongue motionless well inside of his closed up mouth despite the half blinking you saw in his eyes and the way his eyebrows twitched up on his forehead had you hesitating to say what really needed to be said.
We should get back to the party.
We’ve been gone for too long.
Someone might notice.
Someone might find out about us.
Instead of speaking you cleared your throat and grabbed your bag, taking one step away from where he stood; one step that brought you closer to the door and further from him.
He didn't say anything but his eyes watched you and oh there was a darkness that grew inside of them.
Why couldn't you just speak to him? Something shameful and dirty had a hold of your tongue and you could feel a growing guilty feeling beginning to take your mood with the words of your plan for escape sitting on the very tip of your tongue refusing to come out.
You couldn't just leave him here. After bringing him in here to fuck and then leaving him behind once you’d been satisfied. It felt so far beneath you to do; not to him. Not with that silent pout you saw on his face the further your feet moved you away from him, the more it grew.
You couldn't stand it.
You spun around, facing him once again and his eyes widened marginally when you took another step toward him, reaching your hand up to reach around his shoulder you placed a palm over the back of his neck, pulling him into you as you leaned into him.
You kissed him. You pressed your lips over his and you let your lips part into his mouth as you kissed him without any hesitations or reservations, you kissed him.
He kissed you. He pulled you into his mouth and took a step into you, molding himself into the feeling and the shape of all of you until both of his arms wrapped tightly around your waist and you were pulled into his chest; into his firmness; into his open mouth. Baekhyun kissed you back deeply and he kissed you back slowly.
All the while you hoped and wished that your lips and the warmth from your touch might soothe every worry that had tried to take hold inside of his bothered chest. You wished he could have been so easily soothed with a few kisses, a few touches, a few reassurances.
He pulled away from you first and with his lips pulled tightly in between his teeth he inhaled a slow breath well into his lungs through his nose.
His forehead rested against your own and his arms still tightly encircled your waist, holding you here with him for a few moments before the itchy question that had been bubbling beneath the surface of him finally broke free. You heard the inhale before he spoke.
“How much longer do I have to be your secret? I hate it so much.”
Of course this was it. You’d had a feeling this was coming. He’d given you hints that he didn't really enjoy all of the hiding and scheming to keep your many sins under wraps. Even his unrestrained delight to find out you’d so easily throw away years of your career just for the chance of staying with him forever had told you that this man was not the type willing to keep his love hidden for very much longer.
You moved your hands over the back of his neck, threading your fingertips into his hair and you closed your eyes, steadying the rush of nerves that spiked at the very thought of the others finding out about the two of you.
“Soon. We won’t have to hide for much longer. I promise,” you spoke through a whisper and you felt the tip of his nose brush over your cheekbone before his soft lips pressed kisses into the softness of your cheek.
“Just not…tonight. Not when we’ve both been drinking and we disappeared together for so long.” You felt the pull of his lips against your skin. It was a smile. You felt the wetness of his teeth as he smiled. “It would be so obvious what we’ve been doing,” you complained.
“Soon, when?” He asked with a whine. There was a playfulness in his words that wasn't there before; before you gave in and promised him this all would be over soon.
“Monday. Monday we can ride to work together and you can drop me off on your way up to your new office. We can even hold hands if you want to.”
”Super early on Monday morning before anyone else gets there?” There was a petulance in his voice as he continued the sulking act. He knew you well enough to know that you always arrived well before any others from your team and probably before anyone else on the entire floor did. Lately though, with him occupying your heart and your bed until the very last minute, you’d tended toward wandering in later and later.
“We could sleep in a little. Maybe stop for coffee first. We could be a little late.” The alcohol really seemed to be doing a number on you. As you daydreamed of what might possibly come on Monday morning you couldn't fight the giddy feeling building up inside of your chest. Baekhyun had pulled his face back so he could look into your eyes as you told him so many of the sweet promises he’d wanted to hear.
“What if I kiss you goodbye at your office door and leave you behind to answer all of their questions?” He was giggling. It felt manic. His kind of happiness was the most contagious kind. The trembling in his chest shook you and made your own laughter break free. This feeling was more than intoxication. It was a new kind of hopeful happiness that you wished would never end.
“Monday,” he said after a while and on his lips he wore the sweetest smile with his pretty pink lips pulled tight and his eyes curved. “It’s only four days. I can act pathetic and lonely and single for four more days. If that’s what I must do—”
His words were cut off by the steady hum of a phone on vibrate that was ringing. You heard the sound echoing out inside the tiny room and both of your heads turned toward the sound of the buzzing on top of the bathroom countertop. He dropped his hands from around you and reached for the phone holding it up to his face for a few milliseconds to read the name on the screen.
He was pressing something and holding it up to his ear as he angled his torso away from you, at the same time holding his index finger up to his lips to let you know that you should not speak if you wanted the secret of this relationship to remain intact.
“Yeah, what?” He said into the phone with a gruff, put-out tone. You could hear the sound of another voice on the line, a man who’s intonation sounded like he was asking a question. The casual, super familiar tone you heard from both men told you this was a close friend of his. The finger he shushed you with told you that it might be one of the close friends sitting out there at the tables near the dance floor. One of the members of the teasing group chat who hadn’t stopped flooding his phone with messages since you’d given him that co-worker worthy, platonic high five.
“I’m taking a shit, why? What do you want?” He angrily barked into the phone and you swallowed the surprised hiccup that caught you off guard with his insane choice of an excuse for his absence. You had to lay a hand over your mouth to keep yourself silent through the shock and you’d just barely moved fast enough, thankfully, to keep yourself from being heard by his caller.
Your eyes were wide on him and you felt it then, again, just as you had genuinely felt it while you watched him with that rowdy group of young men earlier. The sudden and genuine shock at this version of Baekhyun that you honestly had no idea even existed until you’d witnessed him interacting with his friends had you questioning everything you had thought about him until now.
He was listening to his friend talking; nodding his head every once in a while. Silently agreeing to something without using his words. Maybe he was too drunk to realize the person on the other end of the line couldn't actually see him.
“Yeah, yeah, I’ll be there in a few minutes.” Baekhyun had taken two steps further into the bathroom and pushed the bathroom stall door open. He noisily flushed the toilet and moved to the sink to turn on the faucet, pulling the phone down from his ear and waving it next to the sound of the running water for full effect.
He’d hung up the call and turned off the water before looking up into your surprised face with a passive expression on his face.
You watched him in silence for a few breaths before his eyes glanced emptily around the room a few times as if to question what your curious reaction was all about.
You shook your head back and forth before you spoke. “Who even are you?” Your brows were furrowed and you looked directly into his brown eyes as you asked the genuine question. You were honestly very curious about what sort of new surprises you would learn about this crazy man in the future.
You heard him scoff and he lifted his hands in front of him, palms up as his eyes looked between the two.
“I am a single, lonely, pathetic loser who has just given himself a killer fucking alibi for where he has been for the past half-hour.” He said this with his chin pointed toward his right hand. Clearly indicating the side he represented. When his focus shifted to the other hand which he held out in your direction he nodded in your direction before he spoke with a single lifted eyebrow above one eye.
“Where have you been for the past half-hour?”
This silly man believed himself to be too clever for his own good. You shrugged and scoffed with a quick and dismissive eye roll. You would show him how to craft a perfect alibi while also keeping your dignity intact.
“Darling, I am drunk and this place is huge. I got lost.” It sounded so simple because it was simple. It was also plausible, as out of character as your drunken behavior had already been so far… You pulled your cell phone out and opened the group chat with a few of your favorite coworkers and teammates and you quickly typed out a text message, ignoring any typos you saw your impaired fingers produce.
“I thought the [arty was on the 5th floor I’ve been up n down this hotel so many times. did they move the party????? someone help meee :(“
You showed him the message and nearly instantly, and as if on cue, the replies began to pour in.
“Omggggg ma’am lmao”
“lololol miss manager is lost”
“search party for mis manger nobody has any more fun till we find her”
“She’s so cute drunk”
“Third floor! We are on the third floor!!”
“Stay where you are I’ll come save you”
You looked up into Baekhyun’s shocked face and your lips pulled into a self satisfied smile.
“You are so cute drunk. Who is the one who said that? Is it a guy? Dani sounds like a guy.”
His pointy fingertip was touching your screen as he tried to scroll back up and get closer look at the names and pictures of the people in this group chat and you specifically did not dignify his silly questions with an answer. Instead you locked your phone and put it back inside of your bag; turning your back on him, you raised a hand to unlock the bathroom door.
You poked your head out first. The coast was clear and in the far off distance you could hear the thump thump thump of the party that was still going on. “You go right and I’ll go left?” you asked behind you.
Baekhyun’s head poked out beside you, just over your shoulder and he turned his head quickly to the right and to the left, scanning the area for witnesses. You had already done this part. He didn’t need to also do this part.
“If you go left, you’ll get even more lost.” He said in a serious voice and you felt him give you a solid push through the doorway at the same time as he reached down and grabbed ahold of your hand. He started walking toward the right, pulling you along with him.
“Baekhyun,” you whispered from behind him, wiggling your hand to try and get him to release the tight grip, “Baekhyun, I wasn’t really lost.”
You pulled back against him harder, and stopped your feet from moving forward, “Baekhyun, that was a lie, remember?” It took some urging but he eventually felt your resistance and turned back around to look at you. There was a sudden change in his face as he closed up his eyes and threw his head back. His lips pulled into a wide and beautiful smile and he had a moment of realization.
“Oh shit, that’s right,” he laughed hard and pulled his hand over his belly as he did it.
Oh no.
Ohhhh no.
This man was not in his right mind right now.
”Baekhyun,” you urged in a more serious tone, trying your best to keep all hints of amusement off of your face. You could feel your own smile fighting you. He was so drunk and he was so adorable, “Baekhyun, not tonight. Not tonight, okay? Monday. Remember?”
You pulled your hand out of his and he looked down at his own empty hand with a small frown before he nodded his head up and down twice.
“Not tonight,” he repeated, showing you that he was here now and he fully understood what you were telling him. Until his eyes found yours again and he inhaled a quick breath to speak again.
“Tonight!” he said excitedly and his lips were parted and your stomach dropped as you flattened your lips and closed your eyes in frustration.
“Not tonight.” You said feebly but he was excitedly tapping you on the arm. Clearly worked up enough about something to be having trouble getting the words out in order.
“No, no. I know. Not tonight for that. Not that, but tonight — tonight, my friends, the guys, my boys,” he was moving as he gestured with both hands as if they held onto something in the empty space in front of him, “and your girls,” he moved his hands to hold onto the emptiness on the other side, “my boys and your girls,” his face dropped and he lifted an eyebrow, “are having an after party tonight. Tonight, tonight.” He lifted a hand and pointed his finger downward.
Clearly his words weren’t fully cooperating with him and he’d resorted to using his hands and arms to pantomime his meaning. It worked though. You followed wherever his hands moved and you relaxed with the faith that he would behave himself just enough to keep things under wraps until Monday. He was also very excited about whatever he was trying his best to tell you about right now.
With one hand he reached out wide to the side and he closed his eyes up and shook his head. “After-party,” he said, “round two,” he lifted two fingers up with his eyes still closed.
”My party,” he placed his palm flat on his chest and swayed on his feet, “my going away party — Junmyeon said your girls told him. My boys have been invited. We are all going — tonight.”
“They are,” he lifted both hands and intertwined his fingers in front of his face, “they are all together now.”
After he finally got the entire message out he giggled quietly to himself.
“Woooo,” he breathed through his mouth, making a little sound as he did it, “I’m drunk — hitting me now. Fucking tequila.”
He smiled that breathtaking smile right at you before he turned and left. You noticed he took a right turn at one of the hallways ahead of you and you were thankful that in his drunken mind he knew the layout of this hotel enough to be able to find a different route back to the party.
You counted to twenty inside of your head before you took the first step and it only took you a few moments before someone grabbed you by the arm, linking a warm elbow within yours with a cheerful smile on her face. There was another girl on the other side, equally as warm. These were your people.
“We found her!” They both cheered in unison toward a much larger group of people who all lingered on the outskirts of the now, winding down party. “Round two! Round Two!” A noisy chorus rang out and you were not once let go of someone’s tight grip on you as you were steered quite deliberately out of this hotel ballroom, into an elevator that moved down to the street level and out of this building entirely.
From the murmuring around you, you gathered that Baekhyun’s cousin owned a swanky bar up the street; easily within walking distance. Spirits were high and the group of people was larger than you thought would be able to fit inside of a single bar. Worries were hushed and Baekhyun assured everyone that he texted his cousin and the bar was completely ours for the rest of the night. There would be food and alcohol and music and even, “An open mic should anyone wish to serenade someone special,” one of Baekhyun’s noisier friends said with a dramatic wink of his eye that earned him a hard smack on the back.
You had no idea who anyone was. There were just so many of them. You did hear someone calling one of them Junmyeon and you knew this had to be the one who had called Baekhyun earlier. There was also a Minseok who was shockingly pretty for a man, and Jongdae who was the loudest of all of them. If you had thought Baehyun’s best friend Chanyeol had been loud, apparently you just hadn’t heard Jongdae’s volume yet. There were some others who were much quieter, and one with striking, large, very expressive eyes who hadn’t said a single word since you’d seen him. He did give you a sweet smile and a little nod of his head which put you at ease. You were certain he was a delight on his own, but with this group, he probably just couldn't be bothered with competing against the other very loud, very chatty members of the group.
Swanky seemed like not a grand enough word to describe this place. The word “bar” was such a vast understatement it hardly even deserved to be used at all. This place was the highest of high end; the kind of place without a name on the door, without a listed phone number; with a strict clientele of only the city’s most elite visitors. You were sure most of the people who walked by that door on the street level had no idea what kind of beauty and opulence lay just inside. They would never know either.
The moment you stepped inside the fragrance, the lighting, the shimmer and glimmer and the air even, all enveloped your body entirely in what could only be described as the kind of warmth you feel coating your skin when you slip into a hot bathtub. It was like slipping out of your bra and restrictive loathing and slipping on a silk nightgown that expensive smooth fabric that glides against your skin.
You were all ushered toward a large table and one by one, people sat down. Baekhyun was sidetracked by a beautiful woman who pulled him in for a tight hug. She spoke to him in joyous up close whispers and he replied in kind with giggles and smiles, grabbing his hand and shaking it, giving him a sweet kiss on the cheek. You were unprepared to face the hot surge of jealousy you felt deep inside your chest and you had to look away from this exchange. You focused instead on keeping the sweet smile etched onto your face. Your hands were shaking and your feet moved as if the floor was covered in super glue, but you kept that smile up for long enough for you to find a spot to sit at the big table.
Your just clear enough mind fought very hard against your heart and pulled your legs to sit down in the empty seat between Sandi and Marci before you could linger too long on the empty one beside where Baekhyun was headed, on the opposite side of this enormous table.
You didn’t need to feel the warmth of his body beside you.
You didn’t need to be reminded of how good he smelled.
Dishes of food arrived and fresh drinks were passed around and the small waitstaff was overly attentive and polite. The delicious food did more for your mind than any fake smiles did. You could feel your blood clearing the more you ate and as the food went in, you kept your focus on the food in front of you, on the drinks in front of you, on the company of women that sat on either side of you for long enough to get a handle on it. For just long enough for you to trust yourself enough to look up and across that table at the pair of dark brown eyes that you could feel watching you at this very moment. As he ate, as he laughed, as he talked and joked, as he drank; those eyes always found you. You were right to put some distance between you both.
The air in the room shifted then as the hum of the A/C sounded out suddenly and you felt a slight chill in the air. It was probably because you were sobering up some and the heat from the liquor wasn’t warming you from the inside anymore but you could feel an alarming sensation from below your revealing dress as the chill puckered your skin.
Oh no. Your stickers were long gone. A weird self conscious thought invaded your mind and you pulled out your cell phone to send the quickest discrete text message to your boyfriend. You kept the phone below the table as you did it and you gave it a second before you saw his attention drawn to the phone in his pocket.
His hands moved below the table and you watched the tick of his pupils as he read your message. There was a quick movement of his thumbs and your phone vibrated once, telling you he had responded to your question. He did not look at you at all but was well into a long discussion with the men who sat around him.
“Can you tell that my stickers are gone?”
”yes.”
He answered you so very quickly. He didn't even look up to verify that he could actually see your ice cold nipples poking straight out, ruining the luxurious look of this dress. This wouldn’t do. You rose to your feet and excused yourself for the bathrooms; all the while crossing your arms over your chest as you rubbed hands over your bare forearms in some attempt to warm yourself up. You needed a first hand look in the mirror. Maybe someone had a suit jacket you could borrow. With all of these charming young men surely one of them could sacrifice theirs for a lady with a chill.
You had to walk past his end of the table to get to the bathrooms and you noticed he shifted his weight a bit as soon as you began moving; all while still not looking at you. He continued carrying on with his friends; laughing and joking as if you were of no interest to him at all. If only you could borrow a tiny bit of his self control right now, you might not have been watching him so intensely.
He stood up on his feet the moment you came right up to his side on your journey through the room.
In a swift motion, Baekhyun, stood on his legs and he removed his blue suit jacket, then he turned it around, leaned over to where you stood and placed it right over your shoulders as you walked by and the moment the warmth and the smell of him landed over your back, coating you entirely in the heat you’ve been craving since you walked into this bar, your feet stalled their forward motion and you actually froze in place.
Not him though, the action was smooth as hell. Just as fluidly as his initial surprising movement started, he continued the motion and spun back around in a circle, sitting down seamlessly, effortlessly, and very quickly as if he had never even gotten up in the first place.
But he did. He did get up. He did give you his warm jacket with all of his body heat and scent and he did it right here. He put it on you himself with his own two hands.
And everyone saw him do it.
He did that in this room full of people — people who had been drinking all night, people who knew the both of you, people who, at least half of which, knew of his intense crush on you. The room erupted into a drunken cacophony of hoots and hollers and you could feel the blood rushing straight up your neck and warming the skin of your cheeks.
“Shut up. She was just cold.” You heard his complaints clearly as he was obviously trying his best to quiet down the excitement he had just caused, “You guys are so dumb.”
You forced your feet to move. Gripping the lapel of his jacket tightly around your shoulders you took another step and then another, moving quickly away from the noise and chaos he had just caused, towards the sanctity of that bathroom that you so desperately needed right now.
After a few quiet moments your phone buzzed once.
“Sorry,” was all his text message read.
You opened it and read it but you did not reply. Instead you used the toilet, washed your hands, used your ice cold hands to cool the hot skin on your face as you gave yourself a quietly whispered little pep talk about what you should be doing with your eyes while you were out there. You decided that you would strike up an intense conversation with Sandi about her love life. You would be engrossed enough to hear about her escapades to keep your mind off of the handsome man who sat at the end of that table ignoring you while his very attractive “cousin” or whatever the hell she really was to him, giggled at his jokes and gave him free appetizers, and told him about a girl she was going to set him up on a blind date with and called him Sweetness in a saccharine tone. Did she think she was a southern debutante?
You derailed your own pep talk with the pain you felt in the palm of your hand. You were squeezing down so hard you saw little half moons pressed by your fingernails into your palm.
You took several deep calming breaths. You recognized that you were acting ridiculous. Self awareness is the first step to recovery. You reminded yourself of this mid-calming breath and when you emerged from that bathroom and stepped out into the hallway you noticed that much of that chaos and noise from earlier had settled down. You could hear voices, some excited shouting and some groaning and it sounded like the group had finished dinner and had moved on to some sort of game. Knowing this group, it was likely a drinking game; hence the over the top groaning and cheering.
A quick peek around the corner kept your feet from moving forward because Baekhyun’s chair was empty. Had he left for the bathrooms as well?
Your shameless curiosity drove your legs to move in the other direction because your ears picked up on a familiar voice, just off a corner from where you stood.
It was his voice for sure. He was chatting and there was a word attached to a statement in a woman’s voice that gripped you so tightly to hear it said out loud.
Fiancé
She said the word fiancé.
Only the word and its meaning was skewed and broken because she was speaking to him quite obviously, about someone other than you.
“I saw your fiancé the other day,” she said. You felt a spindly pins and needles sensation slipping up the back of your spine.
He responded in a low voice. You couldn't make out what he said. It was some sort of low, rough tone.
“Oh really? That’s not what I heard.” She replied in a cocky, confident tone and you heard him clear his throat. Was that a nervous, caught sort of throat clearing? Was it annoyed or denial? Your lungs burned and you felt as if there wasn’t enough air to clear the anxious buzzing happening inside of your skull.
Fiancé? You felt a dizzy, sinking feeling inside.
Had Baekhyun been engaged to marry someone? Someone he loved, maybe? You could not help the way your neck craned to get closer and the few steps you took as you closed your eyes, begging to be able to hear what he was saying to her. The sounds of his clear yet quiet voice, at last, broke through the noise.
“last year — bullshit — excuse for a mother — my life is mine — can think whatever they want — drove me to a point — almost gave up — ”
You only got bits of it but from the little you had to work with you could tell right away and with the realization came an instant shame that covered from the over of your head down straight into your chest. This wasn’t something he had chosen. It wasn’t something he wanted any part of. Someone had been forcing him into it. And at some point last year, during his lowest point it seemed, fueled by some personal crisis, triggered and hopeless, desperately awful in every way — he called it all off.
Something so huge had happened in his life during that time and you had no idea about any of it.
You felt an acrid taste in the back of your throat. You took a step back and away from this and quickekend your steps further once you were sure you were out of earshot.
This isn't something you wanted to overhear about him like a sneaky jealous girlfriend who just couldn't stand the idea that every single bit of his mind was occupied only with you. You pulled the suit coat tighter around your shoulders as you moved. You felt dirty and unworthy of the sweet warmth he had given you as you did it. It was an awful feeling; knowing you had overheard something like that; something he likely didn’t want you to know about.
You wanted him to tell you all about his past, no matter how painful it was, but with his own two lips. You wanted him to share his past pain with you just as you would share your own past with him; but only when you both were ready for it and only on each other's terms.
Your stomach ached with the idea of leaving this to fester. Leaving this guilty feeling to sit inside of you without speaking to him about it; without apologize to him for your blatant jealous, shameful eavesdropping.
You had found a small nook just off of that hallway and you stood there chewing on your thumb nail and you waited.
It didn't take very long before you saw the first glimpse of him. He wa heading back to the table and you reached a hand out, touching his arm from where you were hidden inside of your little hole. He actually flinched and yelped out in surprise when you touched him.
“Jesus,” he was holding his chest as he whispered.
“Can I talk to you for a second? Just for a minute, please.” You recognized the serious tone on your own voice and it had you cringing for how ridiculously bad you felt about this. His face shifted instantly. He was overcome with a look of genuine concern and worry and he nodded his head, looked once behind him and made a motion with his hand toward another area of the bar. It was a space just off the kitchens where he led you to and once you followed him back there you found him leaning against the wall with his arms folded over his own chest in a fully protective stance. His eyes were full of worry and you realized that your choice of words, the ‘can we talk’ thing must have sent a jolt of panic through him; as it would have sent through you.
The second you came close enough for his whispered words to reach your ears you saw the small step he took in your direction. He lifted a trembling hand to reach out toward you and on his lips was the beginning of a pleading apology.
“I’m sorry about the jacket — ” he began. You lifted a hand and shook your head to cut him off.
“This isn’t about anything you did. I owe you an apology and I need to say it now or it’s going to destroy me from the inside.”
Your quick words closed up his mouth and his shoulders sagged as he his face ticked to the side in confusion. His didn’t speak but his eyebrows furrowed and you caught the stuttered breath that caught halfway inside his throat as he tried to breath through it.
“I overheard your conversation just now with your cousin. It was not my place to hear it. I was dealing with some imaginary jealousy about how friendly and how familiar you were with her and I heard you two talking and before I could stop myself, I was listening to what you both spoke about. I’m so sorry I did that. It was awful of me to do. I feel as if… that was your private … life .. and if the tables were turned and you had done what I did, I might be upset about it. I’m so sorry, Baekhyun.”
He was motionless throughout your entire confession and apology and when you were done speaking you inhaled a deep breath and held it as you anxiously watched his face for any signs of what he was thinking about what you had done.
You saw a wave of motion move through him and he turned away from you for a moment as his hand ran over the length of his face. When he angled himself back in your direction his brown eyes sat heavy and deep within your own and he looked at you with a pull of his chin upward.
Before he spoke he licked his lips and his face twisted into the smallest grimace.
“You didn’t need to ever tell me that you heard that—” He started speaking. A clear upward inflection in his words that signaled very plainly that he wasn’t finished speaking with this one phrase. You couldn’t help yourself though.
Your nerves had your hands shaking and your voice trembling. “It was wrong of me to list—” you interrupted him but as soon as your words left your lips he raised a hand to stop you from speaking. You knew you were wrong. You knew you were moving out of turn and his quick hand and with the tight way he closed his eyes, instantly stopped your silly tongue from moving any further.
“Stop, please—“ he begged quietly and you bit down on your lips to keep yourself better behaved.
“You— didn’t need to tell me this…you could have gone the rest of our lives never mentioning that you knew this until one day it came up and I told you — I told you how painful it was, how hard it was for me at the time and you could have just pretended not to know and acted so surprised to hear that yes, I was being forced to marry someone I don’t know, against my will, my entire life and future being stolen from me because of disgusting greed and how very fucking close I came to not even existing at all anymore because of that pain—”
“I would have told you about this. Absolutely, and without a doubt, I would have told you everything, but you — you — instead you — instead you have given me honesty. You chose, for me, to be so very gracious and beautifully true to me and save me the years of the indignity of believing something about you that isn’t true.”
“Do you realize how insanely unparalleled you are? Do you have any idea how high of a standard you set?”
“How can I ever compare to you? I think I would have listened and I wouldn’t have even felt guilty about it. I wouldn’t have told you I heard anything. I don’t feel like I deserve you at all, but goddammit I love you so much I feel like I’m going to cry.”
His heavy words pulled your arms down from your chest and they hung lifelessly by your side. You felt pulled in every way, down into this carpeting that covered the floor below your feet. You had to close your eyes and drop your face and you slumped and sagged deep on the inside under the immense weight of all of this.
“You don't have to be so quick to forgive me,” you whispered and you heard the movement in front of you when he took a step. You noticed the shadow of his arms moving around you a second before you felt the warmth of his embrace as he circled himself around you, pulling your shoulders inward with the pressure of his hug; he pulled you firmly into his chest; tucking his face into your hair just over your shoulder and the breathe he inhaled from here trembled and shook.
“There is no part of my life that I want to keep private from you,” he spoke directly into your ear and you stumbled backward with the force of this embrace. “Let’s just think of this as a fortuitous event. Now I don't have to lie to you or come up with some stupid excuse for why I’m too much of a coward to answer my mother’s phone calls.”
“I don't think that’s cowardice, Baekhyun. You don't want to be hurt. Anyone would avoid pain if they can help it.” You could feel the relaxation in his limbs as he loosened the tight hold he had on you. You used this opportunity to lift a hand and lightly tap along his arm, urging him to let you go. The crisis had passed and you were lucid enough to know that this sort of embrace was definitely not something co-workers did, no matter how much they had had to drink that night.
The food you’d both had earlier had really done some wonders for your resolve and self control because he let you go quietly and took a step back, leaning against the wall with his arms firmly crossed but much lower over his chest this time.
This time, it wasn’t to protect his heart from whatever potentially damaging word you might need to tell him. Now he took on a much more relaxed posture that looked almost too casual. He had a slight grin on his lips and his eyes had a bit of mischief that always, always put you on some level of alert. You knew this look. It was never good news.
“So you were jealous,” he said with a little head shake, “of my cousin?” With the second part of his question he sneered and lifted both of his eyebrows with a forced look of disapproval but just enough self serving amusement for you to understand that he was more much more flattered than creeped out by your ill-placed jealousy.
You rolled your eyes and you were certain much of the disgust he should have felt when he thought about a close relative was displayed all over your face. Why did he look so amused by you?
“She’s very touchy — calls you Sweetness — ugh, kisses you on the cheek and hugs you so tight with her,” you motioned with your hands over your own chest, “body pressed all up against you. I couldn't tell if she was actually a close family friend that you just called a cousin who obviously wants to sleep with you, or a real, honest-to-god first cousin.” A new thought occurred and you inhaled to keep going, “ugh, or like one of those fourth cousins, twice removed; the ones that you're legally allowed to marry and make babies with even if it is technically still gross.”
His eyes narrowed, with that smile still firmly planted in place on his lips and he looked up and away from your face. He was silent for a few seconds too long and his eyes trailed up over the top of your head. He was doing some intense thinking. Some genome math. Some heavy generational calculating. You did not like the looks of this.
“Actually, I think she might be like a third cousin, now that you put it that way. Pretty sure, legally, we would be allowed to get married and make tons of babies. The genes are technically far enough apart. It would still be kinda weird though... I mean, for me. I don't know how she would feel about it.”
A sound broke free from deep within your chest. It was a disgusted grunt and you threw your head back and released it from deep within you as you turned around; giving your back to him so you could walk away from this ridiculous man. You ignored the teasing little ‘he-he-hes’ that broke free from his mouth. You were done. You were finished with this conversation, if he was going to admit out loud that technically she wasn’t even close enough of a cousin to be illegal to marry — and how dare he one-up on your reasonable and vague number of babies by making it “tons of babies” — you didn’t want to hear any more. Not only was your jealousy justified, but this man was gross. Not legally gross, but technically gross.
You were walking away. You could hear him calling after you as you did it.
“But hey, I’m young and single right? I’m single and lonely and pathetic for the next four days, right?” The sassy, sarcastically delivered quip stopped you in your tracks and you instantly turned back around, took three quick steps toward him so you could look right into his face. Just so you could see the look in his eyes as he dared to say such a thing. He seemed to physically recoil to see you return so suddenly.
You did not say anything; all you did was look at him but it seemed to elicit a strong reaction from him. His jaw snapped shut and his laughing, teasing expression shifted and turned extremely grave and serious with your unexpected and sudden return.
“I’m sorry. I was kidding. It was a joke.” He said the moment he was able to inhale a breath to speak, he gasped again, “joke — j-joke. Please don't hurt me.” He whispered nervously and you balked at the suggestion that you would dare resort to violence. All you could do was shake your head in disbelief. All you could do was lay a hand over your chest at the audacity of this man and after a few moments of neither of you moving, you simply turned and walked away.
You returned to your seat at the table alone; although, still wearing his blue coat. The color complimented the shimmering sparkle of your pretty dress perfectly and it was warm and it smelled like him. You wiggled into your seat and Sandi and Marci each handed you a drink. One had beer and the other was smaller and had liquor. Were you really up to another round of this?
It didn’t really seem much up to you because another game was starting and you were up. This game was two truths and a lie. If your falsehood was sniffed out you had to drink and if you were safe with your lying skills the rest of the group had to drink. It was pretty cutthroat and the choice of the lie had to be unanimous and made within a 30 second timer. Phones were forbidden, even though these lies and truths were so personal there was no way someone would be able to google for an answer. Still, you were up first and you pondered for a few moments before you spoke. You picked something very safe. ‘I have never been on a rollercoaster. I am in my 30s. My first pet was a fish.’ Nothing risky and nothing incriminating but strangely enough the two options outside of your age had started quite the heated discussion. You smiled cryptically as even Baekhyun seemed genuinely torn between the rollercoaster and the fish option and when the timer on someone’s phone rang out the group scrambled and chose the roller coaster as your lie.
You shrugged and told them your first pet was a puppy and everyone groaned and drank their shots.
The game was fun and the further it progressed the more intense the discussions grew. There was analyzing from all perspectives and the truths and lies grew bolder and harder to believe.
The drinks were being thrown back at record speed and soon enough you felt the familiar buzz of the alcohol coursing through your system. Jongdae’s lie had been that he didn’t know how to tie shoes and there was much shouting as all of the men around him pointed out his perfectly tied shoelaces. Someone else mentioned how they saw him personally tying his daughter’s shoes the other day at the park and he was easily snuffed out. Baekhyun was up next and he lifted his finger to his lips in thought for a moment before he spoke out.
“I have a diplomatic passport. I own the hotel we were just at. I am in love with someone from work.”
The gasps were loud and came from all sides of the table at his scandalous words. Each one seemingly of equal intensity and you did you best to keep your expression neutral as you lifted your beer and took the smallest sip. The bottle in front of your mouth hid the tiny smile you had there and the discussion around the table seemed to be truly torn. All of the men believed the lie was about the hotel. There was much discussion about how much Baekhyun had to travel in his life and how that hotel had no mention of the Byun name on it. The men never even once questioned the phrase about Baekhyun’s work crush.
The women on the other hand seemed to fixate on this one. ‘I’ve never seen him interact with anyone except for Sunny, who he was training so he had to interact with her, and Miss Manager. Who else would it possibly be? He’s just too busy with actual work to be in love with someone. Unless he just never said anything and kept it to himself. I wonder who it is.’
Eventually the men were louder and pushier made their decision stick; doubting Baekhyun’s ownership of the hotel and you had to smile widely simply because you could not stand knowing exactly which was the lie and being powerless to say anything out loud about it. You simply sat here with your beer in your hand, relishing in his little confession hidden within this game.
They were all wrong. You had to take a shot as well and his eyes were on you as you did it. Those lovely eyes shot tiny little hearts in your direction and you hardly even felt the burn of the strong liquor going down your throat.
“The diplomatic passport?” Junmyeon asked Baekhyun noisily, demanding answers and Baekhyun just smiled and looked down into his drink.
“Wait, so you own the hotel? No way.” Marci asked him across the table and Baekhyun nodded his head once and lifted the beer to his lips.
“I don't believe it. They’re all lies. He’s lying about all of them.” Her tone was petulant; made sulkier sounding with the amount of alcohol she had consumed and he leaned over toward Marci with his own cell phone in his hand.
“Marci, look up the number of the hotel. You can watch me type it.”
Marci took the challenge personally and began reading numbers out loud which Baekhyun carefully typed into his phone. On the last number the entry changed to a saved phone number with the name of the hotel and he placed the call on speaker so everyone could hear. The phone rang exactly once before a polite voice answered.
“Mr. Byun, What can we do for you tonight?”
”Sooyoung, can you let me know how many empty rooms we have left tonight? My friends need somewhere to crash after the party. Do we have enough for,” he lifted his hands and counted each head at the table. You ignored it when he skipped you and you hoped to God these drunk people weren’t paying enough attention to notice that neither you, nor he got counted. “Ten more?” He said after counting. A typing sound echoed over the stunned and silenced group and after a few moments the woman returned to the line. “We have enough, Mr. Byun. I will get them ready for your friends. I’ll place the room keys under your name at the front desk, sir.”
He thanked the woman and the table erupted in more of that familiar chaos of cheers and applause. You noticed that Junmyeon (I am a Gemini. I love rabbits. My blood type is A), the man who sat right beside Baekhyun had a puzzled look on his face and he lifted a hand to count the heads at this table, coming back not quite with the same number as Baekhyun had counted and puzzling over it while looking down at his own finger.
“Wait a minute,” Marci called out noisily. “If you own the hotel, and you don't have a diplomatic passport,” she gasped out loud and covered her mouth with wide eyes as the pieces slowly began to fall into place for her, “then who are you in love with from work?”
The attention of the girls was back on Baekhyun, but suddenly the group of men all jeered in her direction, clearly covering for him. “Hey, don't ask that,” someone said admonishingly. “A man’s gotta have some secrets,” someone else said.
“I thought it was pretty obvious already,” Kyungsoo, the quiet man with the big eyes abruptly spoke out in a smooth and low voice that could not have been more unexpected seeing as how he hadn’t said anything at all since his round of two truths and a lie (I like cooking. I have three dogs. I own six pairs of the exact same pants.)
“Let’s play truth or dare then,” Marci spoke up, quite put out with being told to zip it by this group of pushy men when she was clearly way too invested in this love story to let it go. If there was one thing you knew about Marci it was that she loved the gossip. All gossip. Any gossip. She was a sucker for it all. She was in this for the drama.
The of girls all cheered and you braced for the possibility of having to drink a lot more alcohol if you ended up being dared to do anything too risky, or possibly anything at all involving Baekhyun.
The next game was up. Minseok emptied his beer bottle and placed it on its side in the middle of the table and gave it a good spin. Sure this game wasn’t spin the bottle, but everyone liked the randomness of selecting the next victim in this way. As if pulled by some sort of act of fate the first spin landed on you. All at once, everyone’s face turned to look at you expectantly.
“Umm…truth, I guess.” You said, fully prepared to lie through your teeth if you had to.
”Do you know who he is in love with?” Marci wasted no time at all and the entire table erupted in rabid laughter. The laughter from the men’s side of the table was more intense than anything you’d heard from the group yet.
You steeled yourself; put on your best poker face, the one you used during business meetings and negotiations and you shrugged your shoulders with a slightly disappointed frown.
”I do not,” you said. The disappointed groans from all around were intense. Baekhyun’s eyes never left your face, not even for one second and you reached forward and grabbed the bottle to spin.
Tonight was not your night. The bottle landed on Baekhyun.
The noise was deafening and Baekhyun sat there with his eyes closed up tight in defeat with the smallest tense smile on his face.
“Truth or dare, Assistant Byun.” You said. You knew it was your part to ask, being the last one to spin the bottle.
“Truth,” he said, opening his eyes to look into your face.
Your mouth felt too dry and you sipped a little of your beer as you pondered the kind of question you could ask him that would satisfy this insane group of people but wouldn’t give anything away.
“Ask him who he loves. Do it. Do it,” Marci, Sunny, Dani, everyone was begging you to do it. The pressure you felt in this very moment was astounding. You had to inhale a slow and careful breath just to be able to stand this. The only silent one was Sandi beside you and you looked toward her just as she looked away from you.
You received her message. You figure this one out. I’m out of ideas, she said to you with her avoidance. The woman wouldn't even look at you. She was suddenly extremely interested in something she pretended to notice on the drink menu on the table in front of her.
“Umm…Assistant Byun, do you want to tell us who you are in love with?” It was a dirty manager trick. You technically didn’t ask him to answer the question. Anyone who heard this question would see your good intentions as you presented them. You could play ignorance quite easily for the mistake with your words and Baekhyun lifted a single eyebrow and smiled easily. God, he was a pretty man.
“Not really,” he said, clearly answering the question with honesty and satisfying the measure of the truth aspect of the game while still revealing absolutely nothing, thanks to your creative evasion.
The entire table moaned and groaned out loud. Some shouted in your direction, telling you to ask more directly next time and you laughed and gave your easy apologies to satiate this group of absolute drunken maniacs.
Whenever Baekhyun or any of his boys remained in charge of the line of questioning, things went pretty smoothly. They really were a good group of friends who had his back. The first real bit of trouble came when Marci had the spin and her bottle landed on Junmyeon who sat chewing on his fingernails beside a glaring Baekhyun.
“Truth,” she shouted ravenously, “or dare.” She added as an afterthought. She was trying to influence his decision and as his lips formed the letter D you actually heard her growling in his direction.
He caved so easily. A timid, “Truth?” Came from his lips and Marci pounced instantly.
“Who is Baekhyun in love with? I know you know.” Baekhyun was moving fast. He had his hands on the trembling man. The entirety of his side of the table filled with men were holding in their laughter, holding their bellies that hurt from laughing so much, and many of them braced for something to happen. Every single one of them had clearly had too much to drink by now. They would all suffer dearly for the over indulgence tomorrow, but tonight was just too much fun to stop now.
Junmyeon’s eyes went wide with terror and Baekhyun had lifted a hand to lay over the back of Junmyeon’s neck. You thought he might even be gripping tightly into his neck where no one could see.
”You’re thirsty, aren’t you.” Baekhyun lifted a shot of liquor up to Junmyeon’s lips and Junmyeon nodded his head and quickly and quietly swallowed the alcohol that Baekhyun poured into his mouth.
Beside them both, Jongdae was down on the floor laughing and wheezing through the tears that fell from his eyes.
You couldn't help your own laughter. The evening had progressed to such a point and so many near disaster moments had been carefully avoided you found yourself laughing just as much as the rest of them. Your cheeks were sore and your belly was sore and Junmyeon was spinning now. His bottle landed on Marci and everyone screamed out loud in agony recognizing that the cycle was never ending.
Marci was too determined, as were the other girls who had joined in this quest to uncover Baekhyun’s truth even if they had to sell their souls to do it. Theories began to be thrown around. It had to be someone here. Otherwise those men wouldn't have been so protective of Baekhyun and his secret. The girls were on fire; eyeing everyone else suspiciously on your side of the table and the next major crisis hit when Sunny’s spin landed on the aloof and very exhausted Kyungsoo. He had already had so much to drink and you could see the fatigue with all of this on his face.
In his best attempt at it, he picked dare.
“I dare you to whisper into my ear, the name of the person Baekhyun is in love with.”
The table had gone silent. These men knew the threat that they suddenly faced and Baekhyun’s eyes watched his friend with genuine worry. He blinked quickly and you heard the smallest plea, “Kyungsoo,” he said quietly.
You had some sort of an idea about this man. If anyone could stand up to Baekhyun and the rest of these men, it was probably Kyungsoo. He had a quiet sort of authority that you didn’t think many people would question. It wasn’t that he was unkind toward his friend. The man simply had a definite limit and had clearly reached it.
”I can’t drink anymore Baekhyun,” His words were very slurred and slowed down. The man stood up and rounded the table to where Sunny sat with an elated smile wide on her face and you watched with your heart in your throat as a whispered exchange happened between the two of them.
Kyungsoo then stood up straight and simply walked back to his seat and sat down.
Sunny though. Sunny’s hands flew up to her mouth to cover her surprised gasp and her wide eyes flew around the table as her entire face turned pink with excitement.
On both of her sides the girls were tapping her, and begging to be let in on the secret. It really did seem as if they knew something concrete with how very stunned they all looked once they had learned of the secret name.
Across the table, Baekhyun stared ahead of himself without any focus.
Everyone was very drunk already. Maybe no one would remember any of this tomorrow.
The group of men had all gone silent and after a few moments of whispering between the girls that pointedly did not land into your ears, a strange silence fell over the room.
“Well?” you said rather unceremoniously and abruptly. You couldn't stand this anymore. The cat was clearly out of the bag and you needed to know exactly what Kyungsoo had told Sunny and what had that girl all flushed and bashful about. You needed to know what you were working with to know how to act about it.
You needed either some damage control, or some denial to be happening right now but none of them were telling you anything. They just looked into each other’s faces and down at the table in front of them.
Your question was ignored. It was very unlike them, but they did it.
It was Kyungsoo’s spin and he grabbed the bottle and gave it a good go. You watched that stupid thing come to a stop pointed right at you and you lifted your eyes to look at the man.
“Truth,” you said before he had a chance to ask. As soon as you spoke, he did too.
“How do you feel about Baekhyun?” When the man said he was tired, he really meant it. He wasted no time. You felt the heat of everyone’s eyes on your face and the longer you sat here with this question hanging in the air above your head the less you really cared that much about what you chose to do. You avoided all of their eyes as you deliberated.
If you answered truthfully, well…
If you drank to avoid the question, well…
You weren’t much for bravery. You grabbed your shot glass and downed the liquor. The moment the glass touched your lips the table exploded. Someone was shaking Baekhyun by the shoulders, pulling him violently back and forth and you could see the laughter on his face.
“She didn’t answer it!” someone shouted excitedly.
“That could also mean she hates him and is just too nice to say it!” someone else shouted with the exact same level of enthusiasm.
You truly began to feel a lot of the same fatigue that Kyungsoo had been complaining about. His head was down on the table now and his eyes were closed. You couldn't be sure he hadn’t passed out right here at the table.
It was your spin and you gave it a good go. It landed on Marci and she looked into your face with her lips pulled up tight in surprise. She gave you the tiniest hiccup as a response and you looked into her face; suddenly very, very tired of playing this game.
“Truth or dare?” You said to her. Her choice did not matter. You would get it out of her either way.
She picked dare and you shrugged, “I dare you to tell me who he is in love with. You can whisper it into my ear if you want.”
Marci looked nervously around the room. No one seemed to have any suggestions or offer her any help and so she just swallowed nervously and leaned into you.
You heard her small inhale up close to your ear before she whispered, “Baekhyun is in love with you.”
The sensation of hearing this whispered into your ear at a time like this, while being closely observed by every single person at this table who knew what you had just been told was like an out-of-body experience.
You were floating up above your body. You could see the top of your head, you watched the nervous way you reached out for your beer and lifted it to take a big drink of it. You could see yourself fidgeting with the napkin underneath the beer, tearing it into tiny pieces with your fingertips and rolling the bits into little logs that you dropped onto the table cloth. This whole setting was a mess and you had been the one to make the mess. Across the table, you saw Baekhyun as he sat there completely motionless with arms crossed tightly over his chest, his posture sagging low in his seat and his eyes watching your face intently. It didn't look like he was breathing.
The entire bar was so quiet you could have whispered and every single person at this table would have heard you.
You inhaled a breath and blinked slowly, pulling your eyes up to look into Baekhyun’s across this table. You still did not feel like you were inside of your own body; making these choices; saying these words. You were not involved in this anymore. This woman who wore your face and sat here in your spot was inhaling to speak and opening her mouth as she prepared her voice to say something.
“Byun Baekhyun,” you said. Ten stunned faces turned away from you and looked at Baekhyun.
“Yes ma’am?” He answered through clenched teeth.
Tiny gasps peppered throughout the group. It was like a tennis match, they were looking at you again. Faces were covered with hands; gaping mouths were hanging open; someone was making a wild whimpering sound and smacking someone next to them in excitement.
“I don't think it’s her turn to ask. Marci is the one who has to spin next.”
“Oh my God, shut the fuck up. Let her speak.”
“What the fuck is happening right now.”
“I am going to pee my pants.”
“Yes ma’am. He said, yes ma’am.”
“She said his fucking name. Let them speak.”
The rules no longer seemed to matter anymore.
Kyungsoo had lifted his head from the table and was watching you too.
“Are you in love with me?” You looked into his brown eyes, doing your very best to keep the tremble out of your hands. You had to shake your head a little bit to clear some of the heavy nerves that suddenly made your mouth go dry and Baekhyun did not answer your question right away.
”I thought you said not tonight.” His muttered response was cryptic and vague enough to bring more confused faces back to watch you for your answer. He was right. You had been the one to make this rule and you were the first one to break it. You’d always been very good at breaking all of your own stupid rules when it came to him.
“Baekhyun, are you in love with me?” The attention was back on him and he lifted both of his hands and rubbed them roughly over the length of his face.
Someone beside him poked him lightly on the arm, whispering something encouraging in his ear. Answer her. Tell her. Say it.
His eyes were closed.
When he inhaled to speak, a single earth-shattering word rang out.
“Yes,” he said.
He spoke it so softly; pulling his eyes back up, opening them and letting them land squarely inside of your eyes. He left the word to linger on his open mouth for a moment before he inhaled another half breath; just enough air for him to speak again.
“Yes, I am. I love you. Desperately.”
No one was moving. No one was breathing. Mouths and eyes hung wide open.
“Holy shit,” someone whispered under their breath. “This is insane,” someone else whispered to the person at their side.
The silence was going on for too long and someone cleared their throat. You hadn’t responded with any words to Baekhyun’s answer to your question and after much too long of everyone sitting shell-shocked it was Kyungsoo who moved first. He reached forward and spun the bottle in the middle of the table and twelve sets of eyes stared down at the spinning thing until it came to a clumsy meandering stop pointed directly at the man who had just shocked the entire room with his love confession to you.
“Baekhyun, I dare you to kiss her.”
The once silent table erupted in commotion again. There was an excited energy surging through every single person at this table and you had to close your eyes to block out the pinkness you saw in his cheeks as his friends all tugged at his sleeve, shook his shoulders, sent urging words deep into his ears with such intense insistence that he finally sighed out loud and asked his friends a simple question.
“Should I?”
Baekhyun was pushing himself away from his seat at the table. He was standing up on his two wobbling legs and he took several large steps in your direction.
Your eyes were wide as you watched him. You felt too surprised to do anything other than watch to see what he would actually do.
You hadn’t expected the speed with which he reached your side and you felt so caught off guard with his sudden close proximity that you stood up the moment he came up to you.
It all happened so quickly. You had stood to face the man who marched up to you and you gasped when you felt his arm slip around the back of your waist. He pulled you into him and you stumbled enough for his coat to fall off of your shoulders and pool down at your feet.
Your balance felt unsteady. You reached for his waist out of habit, out of that familiarity with the shape of this man and the way he fit so perfectly with your body. You wrapped your arms around his waist at the same moment as he reached up with his other hand and cradled your face in the palm of his hand and his eyes were down on your lips.
He leaned into you then. He kissed you. Right here with everyone watching.
He pressed his soft lips into yours and the gasps of shock from all around were drowned out by the loud pounding of your heartbeat inside of your ear drums. He tilted his head into you. You pulled his lips in between yours and you felt the soft wetness of his tongue as he slipped it along the surface of your teeth, biting down lightly on your bottom lip as he pulled away slightly, only to come back into you; deeper this time. Hungrier and more demanding. Definitely not something two people kissing for the very first time did. Definitely not the kind of kiss for a room full of witnesses.
Oh, you felt ablaze with this. You’d forgotten every single rule you’d ever fooled yourself into believing you could follow.
When at last Baekhyun pulled his mouth off of yours, you felt the trembling inside of your chest at this brazen act. Your hands felt shaky, your legs felt like you might drop at any second. You felt your breathing too heavy to settle easily and he rested his forehead over yours as he breathed just as heavily.
Your hand had wandered and you dropped your fingers from where they had threaded into his hair at the nape of his neck. With your bodies pressed up against each other’s and his heavy breaths fanning over your wet lips he opened his eyes and looked into yours and your lips pulled into the smallest smile. This kiss felt like the beginning of something. You felt an overwhelming relief surging through your chest and you watched his own smile slowly manifesting on his face. You leaned into him, placing the smallest kiss on that pretty smile of his. The man giggled softly when you did it.
“Jesus Christ.”
“Byun Baekhyun, you goddamn—”
“The son of a bitch did it.”
“He did it”
“A long time ago from the looks of it”
You had to turn your head away from them all; covering your mouth with a trembling hand you moved and you felt curious movement from his fingertips along your right hand that now hung limp by your waist.
He was lifting your hand. He was pulling at your ring finger there and you turned to look at his actions as he very steadily and carefully removed the diamond engagement ring you’d been wearing on the wrong hand all night.
He held it up in between his thumb and index finger and peered through the hole of the ring before he turned to you with his empty hand raised, palm up asking for you to give him your left hand.
You were out of any bit of resistance. You laughed and lifted your left hand and placed it carefully inside of his and he slipped the ring onto the ring finger of your left hand with the widest, cheekiest, most breathtakingly beautiful smile you’d ever seen.
You responded to that smile with a hopeless laugh of your own and you felt him lifting your left hand up in the air.
“What?!” their voices all shouted.
“They’re getting married?!”
“What is happening?”
“Oh my god I can't believe this”
”You’ve got to be kidding me. Since when???”
”Are you telling me we didn’t know anything about this?”
Chairs had fallen to the floor. Drinks were spilled and dripped messily all over the table and the floor. People were on their feet shouting. Some were screaming. Some were laughing and clapping. First in confusion, then in understanding and acceptance and the place was a thunderstorm of so much commotion that even the staff and chefs had come out from the kitchen to gawk at the strange occurrence that was happening out in their dining room.
“For the record, I knew.” Sandi raised a hand at last and the reactions were mixed. Some demanded to know how she would have dared to keep this big a secret for so long. Others were simply flabbergasted that such a big thing could have happened right under their noses.
Baekhyun was giggling. The unparalleled joy you saw in his face matched the elation you felt inside of your body as you laughed with him. Doing your best to answer whatever questions you could answer as tactfully and respectfully as possible and after much of the chaos and drama had subsided enough for you to manage to get a word in you raised your voice, calling all of their attention again.
“By the way,” you began with a smile as you turned to look into his joyful face.
Your next words sent them into a wild round of cheers and applause.
“You are all invited to the wedding.”
The End.
Thank you for reading. I love you all!
Can I Stay? Masterlist
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My experience with Fang
My story in all of this is not that important, it's mostly just a petty drama between me and Fang. Please aim your support towards @catatombi and others mentioned in the original doc in their post: https://www.tumblr.com/catatombi/756286505510666240?source=share
I suppose since I'm somewhat involved in this and the other side seems to misinterpret my issue with fang, I feel compelled to explain myself. It might be a bit jumbled up, because I'm writing this in the middle of the night and I'm a bit sleepy.
cw: mentions of self harm and suicide
So me and Fanged met in a discord server that we were both in for a while. We and a few other wonderful individuals were hanging out, loving each other's art, talking and other stuff. We weren't exactly close, but we enjoyed each other's company.
One day I decided to share a story I wrote for my beloved Red District au (aka Gang au) which included an abuse scene between Grinder and Lambert. I have represented the two before as them having at least a sexual relationship (to be honest I do not remember if I ever depicted them as specifically romantic, I may have, but I cannot tell) and at the time I was toying with the idea of dipping into the dark side of the pairing. I was not trying to make it look like it was an romantic act (which that's what romanticizing means by the way), it was a scene straight up from a thriller. I left appropriate content warnings above the story. Fang saw them and read the story knowing that it would make him upset, he told us as much (sadly I do not have the screenshot to prove it, I don't know if that server still exists tbh). I felt really bad for him afterwards and it made me question myself. He later on appeared in my pms and from my perspective insinuated that I romanticize abuse, which I do not believe I did. The pms in question: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1zYN84ZT1xIAsxrQ8WvdwSlwUviT7InoB I admit it's not the best look to draw nsfw art of an abusive couple, though I would like to make it clear, the dive into the dark side begun after I was already made those drawings, I did not made them with the potential abuse in mind. With the story, I was just experimenting with how realistic can this relationship become. The au had barely any debt at the time and I wanted to make something deep. I was never really given an opportunity to elaborate on that. At the moment of the pms, I was scared for Fang, because he reacted very strongly to that story and I was worried for him and ended up backing out completely from the direction I wanted to take. Him telling me that he had 4 panic attacks over my story didn't help in the slightest. It just made me want to agree with him more, so he would feel more comfortable. I don't want to hang this over his head, because in the end it was my decision to change things in my au to fit his preferences. It could be a lot darker than what I have now, but what I have now is also good, you know. However, I'm not sure how else to describe it, but I wish I was told at the moment "hey, it's ok, you don't have to feel compelled to change YOUR story to fit MY preferences, because it's not my story, it's yours and if I'm not comfortable with this, then I shouldn't get involved". But he didn't, instead he encouraged me to keep it "clean", because he thinks that Grinder is hot and therefore he can't be an abuser apparently (sarcasm). So... whoops. It's not something that breaks a friendship tbh. I just want to let everyone know that I wasn't romanticizing abuse, because Fang's friend in their responce insinuate that I do. I don't. It was Fang who implied it. I don't romanticize abuse, I don't condone it, I despise it. But at the same time I'm not gonna say that abuse doesn't have the highs that make the victim stay by his abuser. It can be about money, it can be about security, it can be about sex and romance too. Back then for Lambert it was for all of those reasons. It was because when there were no bad days, there were the good days, great days even. Days that would make him question his own sanity, make him think that "this isn't so bad" before reality hit him in the face with a crash. Sometimes I wish I could tell that story instead of the misunderstood cat boy and a wolf in sheep's clothing. The thing is that I wasn't doing anything wrong and Fang made me think I did. I guess it happens sometimes and I don't really hate him for it, tho I wish he didn't pm me that night. I hope he gets help he desperately needs and avoids the spaces that make him uncomfortable if he can.
What really broke off out friendship was the situation on Itaku. I was following him there because I thought of him as a friend and he makes lovely artwork. I knew that he made gore artwort, but I don't hate gore, so the fact that he was drawing it in general wasn't an issue. One day I scroll through the feed and BOOM, a graphic piece "assaults" my eyes. Made me squirm a little. Very well made artwork, but fuck, I sure wish I could consent to that view. There was very clearly no content warning, because if there was, I would be allowed to make a choice on whether or not I want to see gore. So I leave him a friendly comment, something like "Nice artwork, wish there was a content warning tho" and I thought that would be it. But instead it turned into a debate that ended with him blocking me on Itaku. The debate in question can be read here: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1z0rC4gxUOzfI_qUu9BRcThOufc_uF9np I was confused and angry when I learned about it, because I ended the discussion with "agreeing to disagree" and yet he still blocked me. And admittedly in the petty glory I decided to block him back on all my social medias. I wanted to unblock him the next day, once my emotions cool down, and propose a compromise. Anyway, I log on to see that Fang left me a message in the one place I forgot to block him at that left a poor taste in my mouth and made me think "this man is full of shit and I don't want to deal with him". He tried to love-bomb me at first, specifically mentions that he wants to be unblocked on my nsfw account, doesn't really mention the other places, really showing where his priorities lay. Then he tries to excuse himself, saying that the PSA he made wasn't about me, but it appeared directly after our debate, how am I supposed to not take that as vague posting? So that was the first lie. He then mentions my art again, saying that he's gonna miss it, not me, a friend, tho I guess, I feel very valued by that, thanks (sarcasm). He makes excuses again, he "warns" me that there are a lot of medias does the same thing he does, including cotl itself, which isn't true, because most do actually have content warnings these days, including cotl. Besides, semi-realistic gore and cartoony gore don't exactly hit the same way. So that's another attempt to deflect. He then talks about how he doesn't know what he did wrong, which I straight up just don't believe him. I didn't know about the vents yet, but most of the conclusions could be deduced from the discussion itself.
Refearing to the vent posts now (they're in the link above) I never told him to censor his art. Itaku has an option to put a content warning, which basically covers up the piece with "warning" written on top and the reasons that the author can add manually. Clearly the tags are not enough, so why not use that? The only reason why Fang wouldn't want to use that tool that he was given, is that it would most likely lower his views. The line "I'm not going to de-boost my content" confirms it. I did not want to block the whole gore tag because I don't hate gore, it doesn't give me PTSD or anything, and it can be cool and beautiful when done right. Gore tag includes a lot of variety and blocking it ALL would feel like a waste. But also if your art makes me - someone who can take the blood and guts pretty well - imagine some random person, who cannot take the gore and has no idea about blocking the tags, stumbling onto your art and being met with an image of a bloody spinal cord. If there is a tool that allows you to warn your viewers that "hey, this one is a bit graphic", if I click on it anyway, that's on me. It's my choice to view it and I can't blame Fang for it. Fang, by refusing to put up a content warning, strips me and other viewers of that choice. A tag is not gonna fix it. I'm sure that those who wanted to follow Fanged for his other artwort, would appreciate the content warning as well. I said as much in the comments. Looking at it from the other side, remember that story I wrote about earlier? What if I decided not to put up content warnings? Bet Fang wouldn't be very happy about it either. So it's fine for ME to get disturbed without my consent, but when it's Fang that sees something graphic by his own volition, then he's allowed to be upset and come to me with a critique? But when I do it, then I get hit with a block? Very classy. The killjoy thing is so stupid, self-depricating humor is a thing and I was aware that my comment might be taken as less than fun, so I was trying to make a joke about it, to break the tension. It wasn't supposed to be hostile in any way. He complains that I don't appreciate him bringing his panic attacks into the discussion which are not related to the topic. If that's not guilt-tripping then what is it? Also the tweet does confirm that he blocked me because he got mad about it. So yeah, sure, PSA not being about me, my ass.
What I took from all this is that Fang wants everyone to respect his boundaries, but he's not gonna respect boundaries of others for his own gains and he will try to deflect blame, because he can't handle criticism. I don't need that toxicity in my life, so I just kept him blocked. One would assume that's what he would want as well, since he blocked me first. The nerve taken to try and wiggle his way into my graces for my nsfw doodles baffles me. I didn't hate him though, not being able to take criticism is not really an evil quality. But I tried to get through to him in the most polite way I could manage and he didn't take it. If that's too much then I can't do better unless I say "You're right and I'm wrong". If I can't express my true thoughts without him taking it as a threat to his safe space, then I'm not going to sacrifice mine for him.
And that was it for me for a while. I wasn't going to talk about this situation at all, unless asked, and people did ask. Because guess what, Fang can say all he wants about how his vent account is private, but that's bullshit. If people can see it, then it's not REALLY private. If you want to have a private space to vent, get yourself a diary. The internet is not a private space, no matter how private you try to make it. But yeah, I learned that Fang was talking shit about me, which was funny at first, until a few months later I learned from Cata about what he did to them and the others. I learned that I was one of the people he cut himself for. He cut himself. Because of this. I can be snarky and passive aggressive all around through this post, but I cannot laugh this off. This is not healthy. This isn't something to laugh about or ignore. It's not about me, it's about what Cata and the others had to go through. Learning about the self harming thing didn't feel good at all and I can only imagine how they felt through out his abuse.
Even now I don't want to hate him. That's not to say that I don't think he's not dangerous. If you've read Catatombi's call out, you know about the suicide pacts, pushing boundaries and just hurting people around him in general. He's definitelly a danger to himself as well as the people he surrounds himself with. But even then, I can get mad and sad about it, but I can't really hate him. This callout is not to hate on him, but warn others against his destructive behavior. In the end what he really needs is to get off the internet, get proffessional help and touch grass. I'm not sure whether or not Fang is actually taking steps to take care of his issues, I really do hope that he does and I cheer him on for it, even if we can't be friends anymore.
And for those who ended up being his victims, even if it wasn't intentional, I hope they can find their peace as well. That is all I really want in the end.
Now excuse me, it's almost 5 am and I need sleep. Goodnight.
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We have a problem: why am I watching this sex scene again?
Ah. Sex scenes. You wild wild beast. The crossroad of many discourses and analyses and opinions and essays and now, here I am, a mere casual ww2 rpf fan, throwing my own hat to the ring. In this blog post I'm going to talk once more about sex scenes -- two in particular -- and why the eff one of them matters, making the ww2 rpf more compelling and the other did not.
Disclaimer: Whether or not sex scenes are needed in media in general or the right way to implement them across the vast spectrum of art is not part of this discussion. Please keep in mind I'm trying to complain about the writing decision in the small scope of the HBO War shows.
I have discussed the problem with the Crosby/Sandra plot line in a previous analysis here. But I think the problem with it requires another (and maybe a third) write-up. Here, I want to talk about why the tiny sex scene between Crosby and Sandra in episode 7 is a waste of screen time.
So, we have the sex scene in MOTA episode 7. It is somewhat explicit and it was clear it is consensual and that the people who are fucking is very into it. In comparison to other sex scenes in HBO War fandom, it doesn't exactly stands out to me with just the imagery of the act (of course this is a personal opinion, whether or not I find a sex scene hot or bad or corny or lovely or [insert adjective here] is not universal).
However, my problem with this sex scene between Crosby and Sandra is that it doesn't matter to the story.
After getting it on with Sandra, and then after she left him, Crosby never talked about this affair in anyway. Not over the narration, expressing some kind of sentiment over it, not with Rosie or any other guy, so me, the audience, have no idea what he think about it or how he might be affected about it. We didn't know what Sandra think or feel about it either because her scenes are about her spy works and that's it.
You might say: well he doesn't have to tell us how he feel if the show can demonstrate to us the same thing.
Yet, MOTA never did that. Furthermore, the show never portray the sex between them matters to the characters beyond getting their rocks off. And then, the sex doesn't matter to the theme of the episode nor the overall theme of the show either. It's just something that happened.
(Sad to say that maybe this sub-plot distracts me from the rest of episode 7 and 8)
This might be consider 'realistic'. In real life, people can have sex just for the joy of it. Which is true, but in a drama mini-series, the choices to include or exclude details must take in consideration whether what is on screen is valuable to the story the show is trying to tell. Why are they including this sex scene instead of the hundred other real life details that don't make the cut? We don't have a training montage for the pilots, we never learn how Quinn and Bailey get back to base from Germany, we never have the D-Day invasion sequence,...
Let's have a comparison to another sex scene.
In The Pacific episode 3, Sidney Phillips met Gwen in Melbourne and started a romance with her that ended in them having sex before he got shipped back to Pavuvu. Personally for me, it wasn't an awesome sex scene either. Both Gwen and Sidney were awkward, they kissed and the entire thing ended with him kissing her bare shoulder.
But what truly matter happened latter. When Eugene arrived in Pavuvu and reunited with Sidney, he asked Sidney about what combat was like. And to answer this, Sidney mentioned him sleeping with Gwen not to brag about his sexual conquest but to make a comparison with the brutal battles he survived.
Despite the fact that the two of them grew up together, in just a small amount of times, Sidney have been through things and done things Eugene hadn't. All of that (both combat and his brief romance with Gwen) had changed Sidney to the point that Eugene could not longer connect with him. There was now a chasm between them. Eugene looked at his friend and tried to understand him but couldn't. There were things that must be experienced to be understood.
And then, Eugene himself went through life-changing events. The war changed him so much that when he returned to Mobile, he once again couldn't connect with Sidney
Or his brother (who was in the Army and was in the euro theatre) -- another person who had gone through the war himself.
Both Sidney and Eugene's older brother had returned home before him while Eugene had just came back, fresh off the board with his mental wounds, and it showed the chasm had formed between him and these two men who supposed to shared this brutal experience with Eugene.
In fact his brother specifically mentioned how Eugene is still a virgin, which highlight further how he was 'missing out' on that particular experience that both these men have.
And this all started when we were still following H company and witnessed Sidney and Gwen having sex. That small thing compounded over time. It snowballed into all these differences and distance that Sidney would have with Eugene, and then Eugene would be having against his own hometown, his brother, his family, and his best friend. It served to show how war had did its number on Eugene in many ways.
The sex scene between Sidney and Gwen mattered to the story, it served a narrative purpose eventually.
Crosby and Sandra's sex scene did not. And to include it meant there would be less screen time for any other story line, leaving not just the sub-plot of Crosby's arc weaker, but the other ones as well. Overall, this creative decision left MOTA a weaker show in term of its writing.
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