#like i did what u told me yet u only made my life so much more stressful bc wtf do i do now???

[bunnihearted]

.

[maxivstappen]

congrats on 1k again mel 🤍 i'm so proud of u!!

i'm requesting for ur event: the lyrics "you make me wanna fall in love" from "juno" by sabrina, and the driver is oscar piastri

౨ৎ MAKE YOU FALL IN LOVE ‧˚. OP81

౨ৎ PART OF MY 1K EVENT & my short n' sweet series (not posted yet) ౨ৎ

summary — you said it was casual, but you both knew it wasn’t. he liked to tell people that he’s certainly not in love with you, so maybe you just had to make him fall in love.

a/n — thank you so much for your constant support ml🥹 im not too happy with how this turned out, but i hope you enjoy reading anyway <3 based on the song ‚juno’ by sab!

warnings — kinda smutty?? jealous!oscar, making out, very suggestive, hints of angst, english isn’t my first language, not proofread

It really wasn’t your fault.

You decided to keep it casual as to not get him into any drama, so that people know his focus was keen on racing - becoming a world champion and whatnot - and also for your sake, because the hate, if you weren’t used to it, really could become unbearable, and the last thing Oscar wanted was for you to have to deal with any of that, you were just way too precious to him for that. So the decision was made. No strings attached.

Stupid, right? No strings attached is something to settle on before being all the way into it. Because at that point of your relationship, there was no way to keep it casual anymore. The only way was to take a few things that had been said two or three times too often back. To leave it all behind and really only do those things for ‚urgent needs‘ . No more spending the night or cooking together or meeting up without the friend group or sneaking away from said friend group just so he could finally rip the dress you had been teasing him with all night right off of you. But he had other plans, he seemed to just keep going with it. Telling you how much he missed you every time he was back from the long weekends, repeating the same three words over and over again as he makes his way down your thighs, kissing every clothed and unclothed spot he could reach from under you.

The first time it happened it was simply an accident, at least that’s what you told everyone. At least that’s what you told yourselves. But your touch and perfume still lingered even after a week, so the next time you saw each other at a birthday party of one of your mutual friends, Oscar couldn’t keep his hands off you either. Confessions of being attracted were spoken out loud and the only thing keeping you from taking it farther was nothing more than a mental holdback. You were scared of the public. He was scared to see you hurt because of that.

After a weekend during summer break spent together you asked him to finally decide on where to go on from this. He blurted out that he’s not in love, so there was no reason for things to get complicated. Your breath hitched. Casual hookups was what he said. Friends with benefits, you chuckled, seemingly angreeing with him as to not make this situation any weirder, even if it hurt just a tiny bit. But he was right. You had a different idea of a perfect life than he had. Racing was his passion, being in the spotlight was part of the sport, and you couldn’t even handle having to hold presentations in class because you hated being the center of attention. You two were just too different.

So yes. It is his fault! Because if he’s really, after all these lovey-dovey moment shared, still not in love — like you admittedly were — then he should stop acting like he did. Why would he get you flowers every few weeks? Why would he gift you a whole vacation with your best friend including hotel, trips and things a sane person wouldn’t even ask for for your birthday, and the rest of your friends would only get a normal birthday card and occasionally whatever small thing they had wished for? If you were really just casual, then why did he treat you as if none of this was ever just casual at all? Why did he treat you like his girlfriend if he so confidently stated that he’s not in love with you just months ago?

He couldn’t expect you not to want him to fall for you too if he was the one who made you fall for him in the first place. As if the “casual” sex wasn’t enough already, he just had to do the most romantic shit for you as to not let you get over him at all. He wanted to play with your head, he made it obvious. Too many mixed signs, too many actions done but too little words said. Lucky for you and for him, two can play the game.

If he was sooo sure he’s not in love with you, which he just had to be, maybe you just had to make him realize his loss if he ever lost you. You had to make sure he knew that you were desired also by men who weren’t him, and since it‘s his fault you fell for him in the first place, he should be the one who has to face he consequences of not loving you back.

In other words, a little jealousy clearly wouldn’t hurt him.

You were getting ready in the bathroom of your apartment together with your best friend, “juno“ by Sabrina Carpenter playing in the background while you gossiped about whatever came to mind — including Oscar and you. It was a secret to everybody else, but not to her. She was the one you cried to after Oscar told you he didn’t have feelings for you.

You finished up your makeup with some lipgloss, and once you were final,y content with your accessories and outfits, you made your way over to your friend’s, jack’s, birthday. Everybody was there, including Oscar. And Lando. His only ally and his biggest rival. If that didn’t make him crack, then nothing would, but you decided to try, at least. Lando and you got along alright already when you had only just met, and he was the first man to point out that Oscar and you aren’t just friends, right?

So when you suddenly put your hand on his arm, slowly rubbing up and down his biceps, he was confused at first, and then caught up on your quick nod in Oscar‘s direction while holding eye contact with him. Lando didn’t mean to do him any harm, but as much as he loved his teammate, he would never be one to turn down an opportunity to mess with him like this, especially not if he knew it would, at last, make Oscar snap so he didn‘t have to listen to his hopeless whining about his relationship with you being oh so complicated. Just ball up and confess, man.

It was innocent at first. Just simple touches, your hand on his chest for just a tiny second because you needed something to steady yourself on as your reached behind him to grab your drink from the small table the couch stood in front of, or his arm around your waist when you all stood next to each other to take a round of shots. Lando was certainly amused and your best friend was winking and giggling at you the whole night, seemingly loving your plan, because Oscar was definitely reacting.

His blood was boiling and he wanted to punch that smug look right off of Lando‘s face. How dare he touch you when he knew that Oscar, his own teammate, loved you?

Oscar thought it was better like this. Playing pretend instead of facing the truth, and he was pretty damn good at doing so. He was sure you believed him when he said that he doesn‘t want your relationship to include anything other than moments of lust, he thought it was easier that way. He thought it would make things less complicated, thought he could live his life without having to put you in any danger, live his life without needing you by his side every second of his damned life if he just put some boundaries. Surprise! It only made things worse, plus apparently, guys seemed to think you were available now, thought they could have you like only he can. And it made him fucking furious.

So when you stood up to pour yourself another drink in the kitchen, he followed, of course not before shooting the other driver for McLaren a death glare. Lando sighed and leanded back in his seat, happy to see your man finally making a real move. He hoped so, at least. Oscar closed the door after entering. It was only you two now.

“Fancy another beer?“ You asked calmly, but the feeling in your stomach was far from calm. This could end in complete rejection, maybe he could see right through your façade and thought you were childish for doing this? But how could you not?! Oscar himself made you do it with his mix of signs every damn time you saw each other!

He shook his head.

The tension between you was palpable as he watched your every move, back turned to him. You felt awkward, but tried to ignore it. The light was dim, and you could still feel the bass vibrating through the floor and the walls coming from the speakers in the living room. Was music this loud even allowed at this hour?

You finished pouring yourself some more champagne when you saw him walking over to you in the reflection of the glass cupboard in front of you. You sucked in a breath, not daring to say anything, feeling slightly hazy from the alcohol you‘ve drunken in the past few hours already. His cologne became starker as he stepped closer to you, eyes closed as you let the familiar smell of him take over you completely. You only opened them again once you realized he caged you between himself and the counter, pressing himself against your behind. He started softly kissing down your neck behind your ear, almost tickling you with how light his lips felt against your hot skin. You wanted this, you wanted him. But his touch wasn’t nearly enough, you wanted all of him, and not just his body. Every yet so little interaction you had during the evening left you with butterflies going crazy in your tummy, yet he never seemed affected, not until Lando came into view. Did he really only want your body and not more?

“What were you doing with him, y/n?”

Nothing but a moan left your mouth as he gently bit into your skin, sucking on your sweet spot as you subconsciously rubbed up against him. You didn’t even want to reply, you just wanted him to keep caressing your skin with his mouth. “Tell me what you were doing with Lando, huh, baby? What were you thinking?”

“Oscar I-“

“Keep talking or I’ll stop,” he whispered as he made his way down your back and then back up your shoulder, kissing and mouthing at every spot. Thankfully your best friend had convinced you to wear the backless top, you thought.

You huffed. This felt so humiliating, but you couldn’t keep going like this, not when he makes you feel like this and then leaves like nothing ever happened. You lived a lie and it was time to stop.

“I was trying to make you jealous so that you would finally stop and do something!”

Oscar’s furrowed his eyebrows and stopped in his tracks, hands still on you. What were you talking about The tension came crashing down onto your body once again, his doing not distracting you anymore. You seemed to want to have this conversation, and Oscar could easily put some of his lust away in moments like these. You didn’t get a reply, the cue for you to turn around and face him. You were still caged between him and the counter, his hands steady on either side of you now as he leaned down to look at you. you couldn’t focus like this, not with him so close to you and with the alcohol running through your body like blood. You looked up at him with doe eyes, prettily batting your lashes even if your mascara was slightly smudged already.

“Stop what? Talk to me, please. I didn’t like seeing you with him,” he looked concerned. Worried even, worried about what he might have done wrong. He wanted to be with you, keep you as his, so why would you want to stop being exactly that?

“Why don‘t you love me?“ You whispered, tears forming in your eyes. You hated it, but it was inevitable. The confrontation was overwhelming you anyway, and being under the influence managed to make it a lot worse. Your hands were all shaky and so was your every breath as you anticipated his reaction, expecting rejection but still hoping for more.

“I- What? Why would you think that?“

“Maybe because you literally said so?“

“Uhm, okay fair point. Listen y/n,“ he sighed, and you could practically hear your heartbeat throbbing inside your chest. He thought for a second, but didn‘t say a thing. Instead, he grabbed your face and kissed you like never before, he kissed you with more than just passion, he kissed you with love. his fingers wiped away a tear that had rolled down your face, kissing and holding you as gently as he could. “Don‘t cry on me, y/n, please don‘t,“ he begged as he now kissed down your cleavage, leaving lovebites on your collarbones. “Was just being stupid, didn‘t wanna hurt you baby, thought long distance is too hard,“ he said something, anything to make you understand that the only reason he didn’t confess was because he was scared of his life not being compatible with yours, and not because he didn’t love you.

You smiled into the kiss once he reached your lips again. You‘d have to talk about it more tomorrow morning after taking some aspirin, you knew, after all, that you‘d go back home with him. It wasn‘t enough to make it official, you weren‘t boyfriend and girlfriend, but you finally had the guarantee that he felt the same way, that he loved you just like you did him.

Oscar swore himself at that exact moment, when he felt you smiling while his lips were dancing against yours, that he would never make you feel so unloved again. It wasn’t his intention in the first place, but seeing your beautiful eyes filled with tears because of him made his heart shatter, and he never wants to see you like that again, not if he was the reason for your pain. And even though you did have to make him realize through making him jealous, you certainly didn’t have to make him fall in love with you.

Because he already was.

౨ৎ general taglist / sns taglist ::

@norrisdriver / @1655clean

[totalswag]

love love love ur writing babes!!

maybee u could please do one where reader begs rafe for a darry ring, like the $500 ones u can only buy once in ur life and u have to submit ur id to buy it.. i want to know what ur thought process on how rafe would go about it? 🫣🫣🫣

promise sealed — RAFE CAMERON

authors note I don't think you guys realize how much it means to me when you compliment my writing. I hope you enjoy this request lovie.

summary rafe buys you a darry ring showing his love and devotion to your relationship.

warnings none

Rafe Cameron was not used to hearing "no." In his universe, money and power could sway any circumstance to his liking. So, when you casually mentioned a Darry Ring—an unique sign of eternal love that could only be acquired once in a lifetime—he became fascinated.

You were seated on the patio of Tanny Hill with Rafe to your right, his arm over your shoulder, watching the sunset from afar. The summer wind on your skin and the birds chirping made the moment feel especially pleasant.

"Baby have you heard of a Darry Ring before?" You blurt out, playing with Rafe's gold ring.

"I've heard about those rings," Rafe replied, and raising an eyebrow at you. "Why do you want one so badly?" He was curious and wanted to know more.

You took a deep breath, knowing that you needed to express your feelings clearly. "This isn't just any ring, Rafe. This is a promise. They only allow you to buy one in your entire life, and you must submit your ID to confirm it. It signifies that the person wearing it is the only one for you. Forever."

"Forever, huh?" he wondered, more to himself than you. His fingers tapped against the armrest, and you could see the wheels churning in his head.

You nodded, thinking he understood how much this meant to you. "Yes, forever." It's not about money, Rafe. "It's about the promise."

Rafe loves you more than anything in this world. You're his everything. He would do anything for you, literally. One thing he fears the most is losing you and breaking the promise of never hurting you.

Everyone sees how in-love you are with each other. The way you look at each other is like you two are the only people in the room. The moment you got together, friends started talking about your wedding day.

But as he saw the openness in your eyes, he felt something shift. You weren't asking for financial things; you were asking for a pledge, a piece of his heart.

As the rest of the night went on, the conversation about the ring stayed in Rafe's mind.

Over the next four days, Rafe found himself continuously thinking about the Darry Ring. Constantly on his mind going back and forth. One thing Rafe doesn't want to do is buy this ring for you then could do something that may hurt you; never in his life does he want to hurt you.

You asked him about the ring one of the days you were hanging out. He told you he was looking into it but never gave you a final answer.

He did research, learning about the company's ideology and the importance of the ring. He even read comments from other couples who had purchased the ring, and each story touched a deep part of him. He wanted this to be perfect.

Once Rafe came the finalization about the ring he started to search for the perfect one for you. Luckily for him, he's been saving up money for special things like this.

Rafe spoke with his sister, Sarah, about the concept of getting you the ring. She was quite excited about the ring. She assisted him with the design because you two hang out occasionally.

Rafe accepted that this wasn't only about you; it was also about him. It was about his willingness to venture into the unknown and truly commit to someone he loved. The Darry Ring's exclusivity was both scary and thrilling. It meant he'd always put you first.

A few days ago the ring was ready to be picked up on the mainland. He was so excited and nervous to see how the ring turned out; made sure it was perfect.

He decided on a simple yet intimate setting. He took you to your favorite spot by the beach, where the two of you had shared countless memories.

You were sitting on a blanket with food you ordered from a restaurant down the road. The waves hitting shore filled your ears. People talking amongst themselves, kids running on shore, etc.

"The sunset looks beautiful tonight, don't you think?" Your gaze is drawn to the sunset in front of you, with the waves gently touching the shore. 

"Not as beautiful as you" Rafe replies, kissing your cheek while reaching in his back pocket for the Darry Ring.

You could feel his heart racing thousands miles per hour with your back pressed against his chest. Frowning with concern before he spoke up again.

"I've been thinking a lot about what you said," he began, pulling out the small, elegant box from his pocket. "About promises and forever."

He actually got it.

Your eyes widened when you realized what was going on. Tears started to form in the corner of your eyes. Getting chocked up by the moment. Searching for the right words to say.

Rafe opened the box to discover the stunning Darry Ring inside. "This ring represents something to both of us. It's a vow that you're the only one for me, and I'm willing to commit to you for the rest of my life."

Tears slowly fall down your face; carefully wiping them off your face. Now your heart is beating thousand miles per-hour. Your entire body is on cloud nine.

“Wh-a-t did I get to deserve someone like you Rafe?” You cry, lifting your shaky left hand, allowing Rafe to slide the ring on your finger.

"I love you so much, sweetie. You mean the world to me. Our love is stronger than any other." You cut Rafe off by pulling him in for a long kiss, your arms gradually tightening around his neck and his hands grabbing you around the waist. 

It was the perfect moment that you'll cherish for the rest of your life. You couldn't take your eyes off the ring, admiring its beauty for the rest of the night.

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[uzurakis]

I’m not sure if this is the place to request, but I’ll leave it here. 🥹💪🏻 I hope you’re doing well! I really enjoy your work. Do you think the JJK men will ever be in a romantic relationship with someone? I sometimes feel they won’t find someone because of the dangers they face. Could you write a scenario where they love you so much but don’t want to get you in their life because you can get hurt being in love with them🥺🙏 (Please include Inumaki and Goji; I love the way you write him so much. Thanks!!! ♥️♥️♥���)

I DON’T WANT U GETTING HURT CUZ OF ME!

featuring: nanami kento. fushiguro toji. fushiguro megumi. gojo satoru

n. i’m doing well, i hope u’re too, nonnie. i don’t write for toge as i’ve stated in my rules, but i surely do write for gojo; so here it is ^^

NANAMI KENTO was meticulously grading papers late at night, the soft rustle of pages the only sound in his otherwise silent apartment. his mind, usually focused and disciplined, kept drifting back to you. he clenched his fist, pushing the thought away as he forced himself to concentrate on the assignments in front of him. “i can’t let them become a target,” he told himself repeatedly, jaw tightening with each repetition.

the pile of papers slowly diminished, yet the nagging worry in his heart did not. he knew the dangers of his occupation as a jujutsu sorcerer all too well. allowing you deeper into his life meant exposing you to those same dangers, and that was something he could not bear.

later that evening, he dropped you off at your home. his demeanor was more reserved than usual, his words carefully measured. “always be aware of your surroundings,” he said, his voice steady but lacking its usual warmth.

you looked at him, sensing something was off. “kento are you okay? you seem . . distant.”

he forced a small smile, though it didn’t reach his eyes. “i’m fine. just tired from work.” he glanced around, scanning the area out of habit. “remember to lock your doors and windows. and if you ever feel unsafe, call me immediately.”

though, you nodded, feeling a pang of concern. “i will. but, kento, you can talk to me, you know? if something’s bothering you . .”

the man looked at you. if the situation, if the life he chose had let him, he wanted to tell you everything, to let you in on the turmoil he felt. but then, the reality of his world crashed back in. “i know. thank you.” he reached out and gently squeezed your hand. “just . . take care of yourself, alright?”

you squeezed his hand back, feeling the tension in his grip. “i will. you too, kento.”

FUSHIGURO TOJI loved you more than he could ever express, but his world was dark and filled with danger. knowing this, he made the hardest decision of his life and left you in the dust. watching you from the shadows, his usual smirk was replaced by a look of concern and gloom. he kept his distance, observing you from afar, ensuring you were safe without revealing his presence.

fast forward, as you walked home from work, you sensed someone following you. your heart raced, but you continued walking, pretending not to notice. then, you heard his voice, low and rough, but unmistakable. “stay away from people like me.”

you froze, turning around to find the guy standing a few feet away, partially hidden in the shadows. “toji?” you whispered, heart aching at the sight of him.

he stepped closer, but not close enough to touch. “don’t search for me. my world . . it’s too dangerous for you.”

tears welled up in your eyes as you took a step forward. “why did you leave? you didn’t even give me a chance to understand.”

toji clenched his fists, the pain evident on his face. “i left because i love you, for heaven’s sake! because i know what happens to people who get close to me. they get hurt, or worse.”

“. . i can’t let that happen to you.”

he sighed deeply, his shoulders slumping whilst you were left with zero words. “it’s not that simple. every day i’m in your life, you’re at risk. the best thing i can do for you is to stay away.” he looked back at you, “just promise me you’ll be safe. stay away from people like me.”

FUSHIGURO MEGUMI often debated whether he should distance himself to keep you safe or savor every precious moment he had with you. this internal conflict left him feeling frustrated, and he struggled to reconcile his feelings with the reality of his dangerous life.

to protect you, megumi kept your interactions brief and guarded. he feared that his enemies might use you against him, and the thought of you being dragged into his world was unbearable. he knew you deserved a peaceful life, free from the horrors he faced daily.

later that evening, you approached him, sensing his uneasiness. “megumi . . is everything alright?” you asked gently, concern shown in your eyes.

he looked at you, his expression conflicted. “i, i’m fine,” he replied, though his sentence lacked conviction.

you stepped closer, refusing to be deterred. “fushiguro megumi, how many times i’ve said that you don’t have to hide from me? i can see something’s bothering you. now please, talk to me.”

megumi sighed, running a hand through his hair. “it’s not that simple. being with me . . it’s dangerous. the enemies could use you to get to me. i don’t want to see you get hurt.”

touching his arm, you reached out. “baby, i understand the risks. but i also know that i love you, and i want to be with you, no matter what.”

“but you shouldn’t be dragged into this. you deserve a normal life, without all this danger.”

“i don’t care about a normal life,” you said with all your will. “i care about you. and i want to be by your side, even if it’s not easy.”

“i just . . i don’t want to lose you.”

GOJO SATORU seldom joked and flirted like he used to, his demeanor growing more serious whenever he was around you. he often caught himself staring at you, lost in thoughts of a life where he could protect you without the constant fear of danger.

he was the strongest, after all, wasn't he? sometimes, he felt confident that he could keep you safe, that he could shield you from any harm. but a part of him couldn't ignore the nagging doubt; the countless enemies he had made, the unpredictable nature of the future. he could protect himself, but what about you? could he always make it in time when the clock struck?

currently, you both sat on the balcony, the city lights twinkling below. gojo's gaze was distant, his mind clearly preoccupied. you reached out, placing a hand on his arm. "satoru, what's wrong? you've been so detached lately."

he looked at you, those usually playful blue eyes now seemed duskier. "i've been thinking about us, about your safety."

you frowned, concern etching your features. "my safety? satoru, i know your job is dangerous, but we've talked about this. i want to be with you, no matter what."

"it's never that simple. i have enemies, powerful ones. i can protect myself, but . . what if something happens to you? what if i'm not there in time?"

trying to offer reassurance, you brushed his shoulders. "you're the strongest sorcerer, satoru. if anyone can protect me, it's you. but i also know the risks, and i'm willing to take them because i love you."

his expression softened, but the worry didn't leave his eyes. "i love you too, more than anything. but i can't help but think about the future, about the dangers. i don't want you to get hurt because of me."

"we'll face whatever comes together. i trust you, satoru. and i know you won't let anything happen to me."

he pulled you into an embrace, holding you tightly as if trying to shield you from the world. "i promise i'll do everything i can to keep you safe. but you need to promise me you'll be careful, too."

@uzurakis

[thepersonnamedsam]

hiii, love your stuff<33 could I maybe request a gen z reader blurb where after getting in a crash due to a mechanical issue everyone worries about her and she’s pissed because she felt seen as weak and vulnerable?? THANK U SO MUCH

life goes on

pairing: genz!driver x '23!grid and some seb cameo

summary: see request :)

word count: 2.1k

warnings: crash, blood, injury, anger issues, tears (idk if that’s a warning), media talks bad about genz!driver, foul language

note: thank you so much for the request!! i am not quite sure if i should write the genz!driver stories in a you pov or a she/her pov, what would you prefer, please let me know, ty :))

masterlist / taglist

It started with a bad day. FP1 was shit, FP2 was also not great. Her day was just not great. Free practice 3 was better, the car had finally responded to her again. In the first two laps, everything went smooth. She was already singing Smooth Operator in her head. But suddenly the car stirred, luckily she saved herself and didn’t crash, but she did retire from the session.

Her engineer and her sat together for Qualifying. She told him everything she noticed whilst driving.

„I feel like the steering wheel is not responding on time. It’s like it’s two seconds delayed, which is not good.“

He nodded and wrote it down on a notepad. „I feel like there’s nothing we can do, I can check with the mechanics, but qualifying is in two hours, which may not be enough time“, her race engineer told her. She sighed. The last two days were bad for y/n, she hasn’t slept good for at least four days. She nodded and told him that she’d be in her drivers room.

As qualifying started, she only got in one good lap before she had to retire. She was right, her steering wheel indeed had a slight delay. Which made turning corners very hard. She ended Q1 in P19, her worst result in qualifying yet. She was disappointed, in herself and in the car.

Her mechanics tried to fix the issue until the race started, but with no hope. She prepared herself for the race, knowing it would not be an easy one. She was scared, like scared shitless. She tried to call Sebastian during Q2, but he did not pick up. Opting for a quick text, she asked him to call her back as soon as possible.

Lewis heard what happened to y/n car during Q1 and wanted to comfort the young driver. With long strides he went to her motorhome. Her engineer just pointed to her drivers room as soon as he saw Lewis approach him. Three short knocks. Her head snapped up as the door opened. Lewis was standing there, looking pitiful and held his arms out.

„Are you okay, darling?“, he asked her as she nuzzled her head in his shoulders. She let her tears fall freely. Shaking her head she told him how she felt. „The steering wheel is delayed, which is so difficult to drive with and also dangerous. But my mechanics can’t fix it, they don’t know why it’s happening and a whole reboot of the system would take too long! I’m scared, Lewis. I don’t know what to do.“

His hand firm on her backside, he just held the young woman. Telling her to retire to not cause a crash would’ve been the best thing. Tell her to refuse to race. But he didn’t, knowing the girl and her ambitions. She would race, no matter what. She didn’t want to be seen as weak or even worse, girly.

She was girly, but not in the sense of racing. She was just as ‚manly‘ as the other drivers.

„I know that you will make the right decision about the whole situation“, Lewis told her. Oh, how wrong he was.

Q3 was finished with Verstappen on pole, as always, Perez on P2 and Leclerc on P3. Happy to see Charles starting this high, she went into the race with somewhat a good feeling. The first three laps were okay, she sank down to P20, DeVries overtook her with ease on the second corner, as she slowed down as much as possible to control the car. But the longer the race was, the more angry she got. It was not fair, the steering wheel was just not responding.

On lap 24 y/n’s car crashed. In corner eight, her steering wheel stopped working. Instead of a turn, the car just went straight into the pit wall. The front wing smashed against the wall, squashing it against her own car. Her head was spinning. What just happened?

„Red flag, the FIA just announced a red flag in corner eight. Seems like y/l/n crashed. Let’s hope she’s fine.“

Several team radios went through.

„Charles, y/n crashed in corner eight, there’s a red flag, be careful.“

„Lewis, there is a red flag.“

„Be careful, Max. You are approaching corner eight where y/n has had a crash.“

And many more. Everyone was concerned. What has happened? What did she do to crash her car like that. Was she responsive? Responsible? What was going on?

„y/n, please respond. The race has been stopped. What happened?“, her race engineer tried to speak to her, she was non-responsive.

„What the fuck, what happened?! Is she responsive? Are the medics on their way?“, Lewis was the first to address the situation. „We don’t know, we don’t see any medics yet, Lewis.“

And as Max pulled up to corner eight he hopped out of his car. He ran towards hers and yelled for her, to show him a sign that she was still alive, without a response. He was worried, he was always worried when someone crashed, but he was extra worried when she did.

„y/n! What happened? Are you okay? Please give me a sign!“, he tried it again, with no luck. He saw her helmet move, the flashy colours moving from side to side. „Ach godzijdank Ah, thank god“, he mumbled.

The medics arrived and ushered Max to the side. Taking her out of the car and laying her on a spinal board. Transporting her into the ambulance.

She was devastated. It was not her fault she crashed. But the media didn’t know that. They would accuse her of crashing yet another car. That she wasn’t good enough to be in Formula 1. They would report about her as if she wasn’t a human being and just something they could play with. They would talk about her like a doll. It was not fair.

Meanwhile on the paddock the talking began. Lewis was the most worried, he should’ve just told her to refuse racing. What if she suffered a serious injury? Like a neck or spine injury and couldn’t race anymore. It was his fault, that’s what he thought.

Lando was worried too, not really knowing what happened, he was just worried. She could be injured. The minutes went by without any news from her. They were hard for Lando.

Even Checo, who wasn’t usually a companion of y/n, was worried. He didn’t see what happened, but he heard from Max how the crash looked - bad, it looked bad.

„We hear from the medics; y/n is okay. At least that. Let’s hope the race will continue without another crash.“

Lewis released a breather, not knowing he heals so much air in his lungs. He was glad y/n was okay. He still felt bad, always feeling responsible for her. And now that she crashed, his head was spinning with gut wrenching thoughts and worry.

The FIA announced the green flag and the race continued without y/n. When she got back to her garage, her motorhome, she expected a angry team principal, angry mechanics and engineers, expect she was greeted with relieved sighs and shoulder droppings. Her engineer was the first one to embrace her. He told her how sorry he was and how everything was definitely not her fault.

She was still angry, no points, no race, no happy ending for that day. Everything was shit. She had a shit day that race. And it was not even her own fault.

Her team principal came towards her, gripping her shoulders hard and said: „I know this seems bad, it is, but we can fix it. I wish I could send you home, but media still awaits.“

So she waited, she waited lap after lap until eventually Max won the race. She waited until her PR got her out of the drivers room and took her to the media pen, where the post race conferences will be held.

Sky Sports interviewed the todays winner. So, y/n waited for Max to finish. She hoped he would never finish, that she would never have to face the camera and talk about the incident.

But that didn’t happen.

„Hello y/n, how do you feel? Everything okay, no pain?“, the nice interviewer asked her. „Uh, yeah, everything is fine“, she struggled with her answer, not believing herself that everything was fine.

„Can you tell me what happened? We just saw you crashing?“ - „Uhm, yeah“, she looked towards her media PR, what was she allowed to say? She shook her head - no bad words about her team. „I-, uh, I lost control of my steering wheel.“

The interviewer nodded. „We saw you retire from the race after Q1, having struggled already in FP1 and 2. Did you have problems with your steering wheel during them as well?“

She sighed. She was tired, her neck ached and she just wanted to be in her bed.

„I mean, kind of, yeah you could say I struggled with it during free practice.“

If she told the interviewer that she struggled with it during the whole yesterday and today, she would’ve bad mouthed the team.

„Last question for today, y/n. We asked Twitter for some comments, would you be so kind to make a statement to some of them?“

She really didn’t want to, knowing exactly what most of them had to say; women don’t belong in motorsports, etc.

„Sure“, she sighed. Her PR nodded, happy that y/n decided not to refuse.

„Alright, @motodports_2 said: That’s the second time this season that y/n crashed her car and we are only on the 7th race. What do you have to say to that?“

She closed her eyes, the headache creeping in like a madman with a desire to kill. „That’s true, that was the second crash of the season. And I am sorry for that, my team doesn’t deserve me crashing that many times during the season. I apologise.“

Sebastian was sitting at home, watching the race from his couch. He couldn’t believe what she was saying. The team doesn’t deserve a driver that crashes so much? Bullshit.

He missed her calls earlier that day, he wished he would’ve picked up his phone or at least called her back. But what she was telling to that interviewer was absolute bull.

Charles, who was next in line, also couldn’t believe the stuff you were telling Sky Sports.

„Okay, @maydrive says: The way y/n is throwing away her career in F1 with those shenanigans. Get a grip, will you?“, the interviewer read from the screen in front.

Charles was shocked, he never had to respond to any comments like that. How was she experiencing something like that?

„Uh yeah, thank you @maydrive for that. I will try to get a grip, and you are right, I am throwing away my F1 career like that, but I don’t want that, that’s why I will keep trying to get better“, her eyes were starting water. Just don’t let those tears fall, y/n. They want to see her cry, don’t give them the satisfaction of it.

„Thank you, y/n. Rest up and good evening!“

Her PR pulled her away and onto the next interview. After all that, she was exhausted. Exhausted and angry. How could they be asking her questions like that? Not fair.

Back in her garage, she let the emotions flow. Tears were streaming down her face, sobs were heard and her body was shaking. Her PR handed y/n her phone, leaving her again with a gentle pat to the shoulder.

Seb was calling her.

„Before you say anything, don’t let them treat you like that ever again. Not your fault, if you had problems with the steering wheel, it is not your place to apologise“, Seb interrupted her, before she could even sob into the phone. He heard sniffles. „Don’t cry, liebes dear. You did nothing wrong today.“

„Seb, I wish you’d be here“, she sobbed into the phone. It broke his heart. Comforting someone over the phone was hard, much more if the person being comforted was a teenager.

„It’s gonna be okay, life goes on, okay?“, he told her. „I just feel so weak and vulnerable. They hate me, they always find something wrong with my driving.“

„You are not weak! Who told you that?“, a voice from behind her sounded from the dark. Fernando Alonso stepped out of the shadow. Seb instantly recognised the older spaniards voice over the phone. Glad y/n was not alone in a time like this.

Fernando embraced her. Hugging her tight and firmly. He felt her heartbeat against his chest, beating like crazy. „Breathe with me, y/n.“

They were standing in her motorhome, embraced in one another. If a camera had noticed, headliners would say: Alonso and y/l/n dating confirmed? But there was no camera around.

She had her family here in F1. She belonged here, just as much as any other driver. She was not at fault. She was not weak or vulnerable. She was strong.

°°°

taglist: @ironmaiden1313 , @topguncultleader , @missskid , @gulabjamooon , @lovelyy-moonlight , @peachyplumsss , @mistrose23

[mandarinmoons]

lemme set the scene for u -

rossi’s wedding (please please can Derek be there 🥺🙏 idc if it’s the wrong time just please let him be there my hot choco)

anyways, shy little miss y/n is dating our fav boy genius and it’s about time to introduce her to the team, and when better to do it then when they’re all guaranteed to be in the same room together!

the team is very welcoming but also can be a bit touchy or overwhelming for reader cuz maybe she’s like spencer with the touching

uh if you didn’t think this was that boring and wanna do it you can change up literally whatever 😭 really just wanna see shy & awkward reader meet the team and spencer just stand there with an awkward smile supporting his gf as she fumbles over her greetings cuz uh that’s me

You smoothed down your dress as you looked at your reflection in the mirror. Dresses aren’t something you usually wore, but duty called and you pulled out your emergency fancy clothes from the back of your closet, something you never thought you’d have to do for a long while. But here you were, going to a wedding with your boyfriend and meeting all of his teammates, also his friends, for the first time. However, this was more of like a two in one deal. The only family Spencer had in his life was his mother and his team was like a second family to him, which made this whole ordeal more unnerving.

“Hey, are you ready to- woah…”

Turning around you saw Spencer’s eyes wide as saucers as he took in your appearance. A beautiful floral dress hugged you at just the right places and showed off your figure, a sight which was clearly adored by your genius boyfriend.

Walking over to him, you rested your hand on his cheek and tapped his chin, “Close your mouth or else you’ll catch flies.”

Spencer rolled his eyes as a chuckle left your lips and it was soon muffled by Spencer’s lips finding your own, pressing a light kiss to them.

Pulling back, Spencer’s eyes were still on you, admiring your beauty while your gaze lingered to the side and a light sigh leaving your mouth.

“I’m nervous…”

“I know, but you’ll love everyone, trust me.”

“You haven’t been wrong yet, so.”

Spencer chuckled as he pressed a kiss to your forehead, “And that day will never come.”

The drive to the venue was nerve wracking. Spencer gave background information on what everyone on the team was like as well as telling some of the funniest memories he’s had with each member. Hearing all the tales did help to ease some of the tension, but it would be a miracle if you’d be able to remember even the tiniest detail by the time you’d set foot in the chapel. Spencer may have an eidetic memory, but you’d be lucky to remember what you had for breakfast this morning.

Arriving at the destination, your shaky legs walked up the steps and Spencer’s hand rested on your waist to try and steady you.

The moment you walked through the door you heard someone gasp and the sound of heels running toward you filled your ears.

“You must be Y/N, it’s so nice to meet you!” a blonde woman you guess to be Penelope Garcia immediately comes over to introduce herself and you feel yourself freeze when she takes you in for a hug. You didn’t mind hugging, but when it came to someone you had just met 5 seconds ago, it was a bit much.

Spencer pulled Penelope off of you gently and told her you were a bit shy when it came to meeting new people and Penelope being the saint that she was, apologized right away and said she’d let you eat her piece of cake as a peace token.

Soon enough the rest of the team took notice of the woman Spencer brought along with him and with their interests peaked, made their way over to the both of you to see the new love birds.

Your breathing became a bit erratic as your space was filled with so many new faces that you didn’t know where to start and who to answer first. You didn’t mind meeting new people at all, but when there’s multiple questions coming from every corner you could think of, your brain shut down and your mouth dried up.

Spencer took notice of your change of behavior and excused both of you from everyone while he led you to the side.

“Are you okay?” Spencer’s hand rested on your cheek while his other hand was on your waist, his thumb gently rubbing over the fabric of your dress.

“Yeah, there’s just… so many people.”

Spencer nodded and brought you in closer as you rested your head on his shoulder and he pressed a kiss to the side of your head.

“How about you meet everyone one by one? Have some to talk to everyone a little so it’s not so daunting?”

“That works yeah.”

Spencer nodded and made his way back to the team with you by his side, taking a hold of his hand as if you were a child holding onto their parent’s arm on the first day of kindergarten.

Making your way back to everyone, you could see the concern written over their faces. You didn’t want them to think of you as this fragile girl who wasn’t able to be alone without her boyfriend and you hoped to God that they wouldn’t make fun of your behavior.

Later on as the ceremony was done and everyone had a blast dancing and chatting away, you managed to ground yourself and now here you were, chatting to the girls of The BAU about anything and everything. What had only been a few hours felt like you had known these girls for a lifetime.

The evening also included Derek and Luke taking turns dancing with you, Rossi sharing his famous pasta recipe and the highlight of the night being Spencer pulling you to the dance floor and trying his best to sweep you off of your feet with his dance moves. Knowing that he has two left feet when it came to dancing, it wasn’t hard to do.

“I don’t think I’ve seen you smile and laugh so much.”

“I guess your team is really good at bringing that out.”

“They really are.”

Looking to the side, you saw some of the members looking over at you and Spencer as you two slowly danced together and a chuckle fell from your lips as you heard Derek call out “Show her what you can do, pretty boy!”

Locking eyes with each other, you squealed as in one swift movement, Spencer dipped you and a second later his lips were on yours and from the side you heard everyone cheer.

“You really do have some moves, Doctor Reid.”

“You haven’t seen nothing yet.”

Taglist: @radioactiveinvisible @whoisspence @sreidisms @lanascinnamongirls @luvkatryna @sp3ncelle @iluvreid @khxna @keiva1000 @reidstheyfriend @hiireadstuff @pleasantwitchgarden @cynbx @kimm4710 @niktwazny303 @reidsdaisies @mindfullycriminal @cumulo-stratus @themarauderseraslut @gayfor-rosadiaz @gubsbuubs @multifandomsimp69 @chyozai @deppfanatic @potatovoyager @indyvelazquez

If you'd like to be removed from the taglist send me a DM or a message in my inbox

If you want to be a part of my taglist go here!

You can find my masterlist here!

Let me know your thoughts in the comments and like & reblog to support <3

[despairots]

#𝐀𝐍 𝐄𝐏𝐇𝐘𝐑𝐀 𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐌: YUTA OKKOTSU.

「 yuta okkotsu x male! reader 」

GENRE: fluff, just fluff :3 oh, and like a REALLY quick makeout but its really just fluff, i think a bit of angst tho?

CONTENT WARNING: swearing, violence, r! helps yuta with his injuries, i have no idea what the plot is anymore, r! is like kyouka from bsd and has her ability “demon snow”, rika doesnt like r! that much :,(, “demon snow” is somewhat like rika, so rika - yuta and “demon snow” - r!

AUTHORS: stop. changing. themes. *holds me by the throat and shakes me* no but seriously the more i change it the more i have to change my layout which i do NOT want anyways happy furina day!!! we luv u queen

there’s something that makes people believe you just lack emotions. maybe it’s the you didn’t react to people’s insult, or maybe it’s the way it looks like you’re always in a daze. yeah, you don’t exactly have anything going on in your head and yes, you’re always in a daze but somewhat, you’ve always gave off this rebellious energy, like something was attached to you that’s radiating this energy off.

so when yuta saw a curse behind you while assisting him, he wondered if that was the thing that was radiating off the rebellious energy from your “jellyfish aura” that his other friends would call it. just knowing you hid something below the facade you upheld was admirable, you always had this look that made people think your mind was somewhere else when you are aware.

and the way your voice shouted commands for your curse while you still held that alluring look before you switched your attention to him and helped him up when the enemy was being distracted by your curse, all he could do was stare when you asked if he was injured.

he knew rika didn’t like you holding him so carefully and— oh? you’re so close — making sure he didn’t fall to the ground while the both of you ran from the area. now, he’s watching you patch up his wounds so delicate that he’s convinced you’re afraid that you might hurt him.

yuta doesn’t know if he should speak, ask if you’re okay when he’s the one clearly injured, ask about the ring that’s on a necklace and dangling around your neck. he wonders if you were almost like him, that explains why he was so drawn to you. maki, inumaki and panda (plus gojo) already picked up that you caused him to be rather flustered.

the first time you two met was when yuta was first introduced to you. you had officially came back from your trip and his friends had wanted to throw you a party since they haven’t seen you in awhile. his friends often described you to be somewhat like a jellyfish, he was a tad bit confused by the wording but he understood when you walked into the classroom.

“welcome back, [name]!”

“kelp.”

you just had this look in your eyes when panda scooped you up and hugged you, the way one of your eyes closed when panda smushed your cheeks together and the small— and very unnoticeable — smile on your face when you realized you were missed made him blush.

“this is yuta, he’s new, so try not to overwhelm him. he’s delicate.” maybe when maki had said that, you started to treat him like some doll. always making sure your touches weren’t harming his already injured skin— and he could technically feel rika fuming — with the focused look on your face.

the one thing bugging him was the ring. were you already married or did you dedicate your life to someone else? although, he sounded awfully like a hypocrite right now. he was wearing the ring rika had given him.

“… what’re you thinking about?”

that was the first time he had heard you spoken in such a quiet, yet calm and alluring, tone towards him specifically. he was once told that you didn’t talk a lot and always kept to yourself, only allowing yourself to talk when on the battlefield.

he was shocked nonetheless, the tone of your face had caused him to jump a little and his cheeks to flare up. what should he say in this? should he tell the truth and ask if you were married? but you probably already figured that out by how hard he was staring at the ring.

“oh. um… are you married?” yuta asked timidly, averting his gaze to the ground, hearing the chair scrap and he’s wondering if the question was too insensitive. you only got up to dim the lights as a headache was starting to form before you sat back down infront of yuta.

you grabbed ahold of his cheek and turned to face it towards you, “are you?” you had shot the question back to him and let go of his cheeks, feeling his cheeks heat upon the hand on his cheek. yuta knew you were gesturing to the ring on his finger and he didn’t know how to respond.

he was married but at the same time he wasn’t, he’d seem unfaithful to rika but everytime you touched him, protected him, and now, talking to him, he blushed. and you had picked that up rather quickly.

you hummed, hands wrapping around the ring and looking down at your lap, “i was. he died though.” the way you said it so casually had caught him off guard, but your situation was similar to him aswell. yuta picked up the way your hand tightened around the ring as he stared down at his, fiddling it around his ring finger.

“the cursed spirit that’s always around you. what’s her name?” he looked back at you, blinking and suddenly, you just looked… too unrealistic? was that the right weird to describe you? “her name’s rika.” and you smiled. his heart started to pound against his rib cage when you held a soft smile, “you’d love her no matter what form, huh?”

he wondered if you were rika if she was a male and your sentence made sense to him. now, he wondered about your cursed spirit, “what about yours?” “yuta.” hearing his name come out your lips had him confused, were you trying to tell him that you didn’t wanna speak about it or—

“oh. oh!”

the cursed spirit was named yuta. you weren’t trying to call out his name, you were trying to tell him that the cursed spirt’s name was his name. you lightly smiled amusingly at his reactions, “i don’t think rika likes me very much… nor do i think yuta likes you.” it seemed that way. yuta could feel rika wanted to kill you and you could feel “yuta” glaring daggers at the boy infront of you.

turns out you two were the same.

you stood up from your chair before bending down to yuta’s height and placing a kiss on the corner of his lips. were you trying to die? did you want yuta to die?! no. honestly enough. like yuta, you would’ve loved your cursed spirit no matter the form aswell.

“i like you, yuta.” it was a simple confession yet yuta’s face blew up into red, hearing you walk away. “ah! w-wait!” he had grabbed your wrist and turned you around, wrapping his arms around you and buried his face into the crook of your neck before muttering words that made the tension from your shoulders to relax.

“i… i like you too, [name].” he pulled away and softly placed his lips onto yours. your hands reaching up to cradle his cheeks as yuta backed you up to a desk and helped you sit on top of it before going back to kissing you.

he was a good kisser considering the fact he has never kissed anyone before… well, technically, not a human being.

you pulled away, a string of saliva connecting the both of your lips until it disconnected when your hand was brought up to your mouth and oh, was that blush he saw? were blushing because of him? so cute.

“i don’t think they liked that very much..”

oh right!

[neptuneiris]

cardigan (epilogue) (1/2)

i knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired, and you'd be standin' in my front porch light.

pairing: modern!aemond × best friend reader!

summary: being in love with your best friend since high school becomes a strong and unavoidable feeling. until it starts to become more difficult when you get to college and the two of you, especially him, meet new people.

word count: 9.9K

previous part • next part

obviously i didn't expect this to be too long hahaha, even i was surprised, i didn't realize it was too much. so i decided to make the epilogue in two parts. thank u all so much por reading❤

Life in Highgarden could not have exceeded your expectations more.

At first you felt like you were supposed to when you came to live in a new city: terrified, anxious and nervous. You didn't want to feel lonely, but it was inevitable considering you know nothing and no one.

And when you arrive at your new dorm, you immediately loved it. Your room is bigger than the one at King's Landing and you have a beautiful view with lots of trees around and green grass.

Highgarden is well known for the fantastic flora and fauna. Everything is green, there are big trees and beautiful plants, there are even lakes and the weather ¡is perfect.

Yet you didn't have much time to get to know the city, because a week after you arrived, your classes started. And a week after you started your classes, you started your internship.

You met Arthur Winslow, the psychologist responsible of your internship, owner of a mental clinic for children, teenagers and adults.

He explained to you from the beginning that, once you were prepared, you would be present in cases of children and teenagers as well as adults to start your experience.

In addition, you would also support him in administrative things, such as his schedule, phone calls and so on. The pay is at a fair price, so it's perfect.

And as a result of Aileen and Sara not making it into the exchange program, you made new friends in your classes.

Although even if your friends had gotten in, Aileen would have chosen to go to Dorne and Sara to Winterfell, so you started talking to the people in your class.

They all came from different parts of the country, only a very few came from King's Landing and you didn't really talk to them much.

And after the first month passed, you just couldn't get any better.

You adjusted perfectly to your internship, to your classes which are wonderful and you also made good friends very quickly with whom you finally had that security to go around Highgarden almost in its entirety.

You went to many places, whether it was squares, parks, museums, lakes and even aquariums. Everything was so beautiful.

You took pictures, videos, made compilations with all your visits to upload to your Instagram, and even went out for fun on weekends to parties and bars with your friends.

You kept in touch with your friends at King's Landing and also let your parents know what you were doing by sending them pictures, videos and also talking to them on the phone.

Even Helaena messaged you by replying to one of your Instagram stories asking how you were doing and how you were doing at Highgarden.

Also her older brother messaged you, Aegon. He asked you how you were doing and also told you that he hasn't seen you in a while.

In truth with Aegon you did not speak much and fortunately neither of the two Targaryen brothers mentioned Aemond and for that you were grateful.

You were not thinking about him, not since you came to Highgarden and that is why you felt so at peace with yourself.

Despite being completely focused on your classes and internships more than anything else, you didn't lie to your friends that you had met and talked to a few guys.

You mostly met them at college parties, but nothing formal, it was all just hanging out.

You didn't have the mindset to really date, you didn't feel like you needed to and really a Highgarden guy didn't suit you if you were six months from now coming back to King's Landing.

You just had fun, experienced new things and officially started your psychology training.

And with the date getting closer and closer to return to King's Landing, you realized you didn't want to leave. Neither did Vhagar. At least not yet.

You grew attached very quickly to everything at Highgarden, even Vhagar with her walks in the parks and the view of the sunset when you took her for a stroll around the lake as well.

Everything was quiet and you felt at peace. However, you admit that you miss your friends and your life at King's Landing.

It's kind of a bittersweet taste to have to leave to go home. You definitely plan to come back because you've even grown quite fond of Dr. Winslow.

Until finally the date arrives and it's time to go back.

It was six months and yet it felt like it all happened in a matter of weeks. Yet you know you enjoyed every second at Highgarden and you don't feel like you wasted any time.

You immediately text your mom that you have landed at King's Landing and you also send a picture of your arrival to the group chat with Aileen, Sara and Ryan.

You call for an Uber and soon you find yourself arriving at the dorm with Vhagar in your arms.

The man driver helps you carry your bags up to your room, which you couldn't feel more grateful for, and as you enter that small space where you started your dependency, you feel nostalgic because you had missed it and happy because you are back.

And not long after you arrived, of course your friends would pay you an unannounced visit to welcome you back.

"You have to tell us everything.”

"And you have to show us the pictures you didn't upload to your Instagram."

"Did you meet cute guys?"

"How was your dorm?"

"How is the food?"

"We have to go to a party to celebrate."

You laugh as you notice the excitement in Aileen and Sara who are the ones asking all the questions while you and Ryan watch them with a small, amused smile.

And even though you didn't answer their questions, they still say they should get something to eat and drag you along with them to tell them everything.

Ryan takes them to a fast food restaurant in the middle of the university and soon the table is filled with fries, sodas, burgers, pizza and so on.

"You have to go one day, the program for the psychology internships are the best. The school is not that big, but the teachers are amazing, they even organize tours to many mental clinics of all kinds for all the students themselves. The only bad thing | could tell you about Highgarden is the food, it's not that good."

"Ugh no, dont tell me that,” says Aileen with a long-suffering face, "Don't make me change my mind about choosing Highgarden over Dorne if | get to go on exchange next year."

"But why would you want to go to a desert?” Ryan asks her confused, "Do you like to get your ass all sweaty?"

"Dorne is a place with incredible wonders and a lot of history, in case you didn't know,” she says seriously, "l've always wanted to see Sunspear."

"Just like any other place, genius. Besides, don't you know the temperatures reported in Dorne? It's like living in hell,” Ryan tells her incredulously. "l'm more supportive of Sara's idea to go to Winterfell where, if she's lucky, she'Il be able to go beyond the North and see the Wall. l'd rather do that than be dying of heat."

"So you'd rather be freezing to death?"

"Yes. A million times yes."

"And what about the parties?"

Sara asks you, picking up the subject and leaving aside for a moment Aileen and Ryan who continue arguing about Dorne and any other place in Westeros where according to Ryan it's better.

“They're not as noisy as here, but you still have a good time," you confess.

"Of course you have a good time,” Sara tells you mischievously, "All those guys you met seemed like they would really show you a good time."

You lower your gaze with a small embarrassed smile.

"It was just for the moment, that's all."

"And you didn't have any luck with any of them?"

You deny, looking at her again.

"I didn't want to. It wasn't...” You let out a sigh, "lt wasn't ideal."

"Oh come on, why not?” she asks incredulously, offended, "Didn't you get a good look at them? They were very handsome, Y/N. And they were just videos you sent us, I'm sure they were really hot in person."

You let out a small laugh, denying again.

"I didn't want to get attached to one of them, let alone start dating because | knew |'d be back here,” you confess, "And the whole long-distance relationships thing... it's not really my thing."

Sara grimaces and gives you a look of understanding at the same time.

"Well," she sighs, "At least you had fun with them."

"Not with all of them,” you clarify amused.

"But you did, so that counts."

After talking some more with Sara, since Aileen and Ryan are still busy debating... or rather fighting, you leave your part of the money for them to pay the bill while you go to the bathroom.

When you return, as you walk towards the table with your friends, a voice you know very well despite not having heard it in a while makes you stop as you hear your name called out.

"Y/N?"

And when you turn your head, a surprised Aegon Targaryen looks at you with a huge smile, standing with him is Helaena, apparently both of them having just arrived at the restaurant.

For an instant you panic at the thought that he's probably here too, but you're relieved to see that it's just the two of them.

"Is that you? Really?"

Aegon asks you amused, wasting no time in approaching you with Helaena following him and you also smile in his direction and shorten the distance between the two of you.

"It's been a long time since l've seen you too, Egg."

"Oh you little devil, you haven't forgotten how much | hate it when you call me that."

You both laugh and he wraps you in a tight hug that you reciprocate with the same affection, because even though Aemond was your best friend, you are still fond of all his brothers and nephews who have always been very good to you.

"Where have you been hiding? I haven't seen you for years."

He tells you incredulously, separating from you and you shrug your shoulders, already anticipating that you will talk about him. And even if you don't want to, you'll still have to.

"You know... here and there,” you say without much detail, shrugging your shoulders.

"Here and there where?" he asks you amused.

"Well... at school, with my friends and also at my exchange."

“But I dont see you around our house anymore, not even on birthdays, you didn't go to the ball either," he says almost in a sad tone, "You don't talk to my brother anymore, do you?" he asks a little more seriously, "Since the ball happened and he didn't take you, I knew something had happened. It seemed strange to me since you always went together every year."

You let out a long breath, lick your lips and nod, not wanting to give more importance to that matter that already happened many months ago.

"Yeah," you smile a little, affirming, "Yeah, since then."

"Forgive him,” Helaena stands between the two of you, with a smile and a sorry look, "l told him clearly that he won't ask you about him if he sees you when you come back, but his mental capacity is so low that the idiot doesn't understand."

You can't help but laugh at this, while Aegon at her side looks at her offended.

"l only wanted to corroborate what you told me,” he says innocently.

"Corroborate?" Helaena asks him.

"Yes," he says at once, still offendead, "I didn't believe you. At least not much. The two of them were inseparable and to suddenly not be friends anymore... it was like when | found out that Jack and Rose never existed and it was just a fictional story for the Titanic movie, I couldn't believe it and i felt cheated."

"Shut the fuck up."

Helaena says to him with a bad face and then turns to you with the smile and the softest and most pleasant look so characteristic of her.

"l'm so happy you're back. I didn't even know you were back, if i had known i would have texted you and we would have gone for a coffee."

"Thank you, Hel,” you smile softly at her, "And no, i didn't say anything about coming back and i honestly don't know why. I was so sad to leave but at the same time i was desperate to be back home."

"And what about Highgarden?" she asks you excitedly, "l've always been looking forward to going there. The nature there is just wonderful. There are lots of aquariums, isn't there?"

"Yes, yes, everything is amazing," you assure her, "Except the food. That's my only complaint. Everything is too... healthy"

"Oh yes, i knew that already," she says to you in understanding.

"And where do you live now that you don't live with my brother anymore?" Aegon asks interested, "Did you rent an apartment for yourself?"

"No, no, i live in a dorm now,” you clarify, "Because of the scholarship i got a big discount, and with the money i got paid for my internship at Highgarden, i have a chance to look for another job around here for a month."

"Oh, great,” he nods, listening to you attentively.

"A friend of mine who works at a boutique nearby recently told me they're looking for female employees. She works part time, maybe you have the same schedule if i pass you her number and she gives you more information."

Helaena tells you with such confidence that you're thankful that the first day you've been back to King's Landing, she's already saved you from looking for a job.

The flower shop where you worked before is already full of employees since your quitting, Sara told you since she went to ask to let you know before returning to King's Landing.

And now Helaena has helped you with that.

"That would help me a lot, Hel. Thank you so much."

"Oh, it's nothing,” she says nonchalantly taking her phone, "I'II tell my friend and then I'll pass you her number, don't worry."

After talking and keeping up with both of you for a few more minutes, your friends call you to leave and that's when the three of you say goodbye.

They both tell you if you want to keep them company, but since you've already eaten and you also have a mess in your room that needs to be cleaned up for your return, you agree to go out to dinner next week.

And just as you say, that's what happens once you're back in your dorm.

Vhagar greets you and keeps you company as you start to get all your clothes, shoes, make-up and all your stuff out of the suitcases. You also get something in and start arranging your few pieces of furniture in different ways in your space, wanting to try something new.

You put all your clothes in your closet, not wanting to leave anything for later, that takes some time, also to sweep and rearrange everything as you had it in your small bathroom.

You even fill a basket with clothes that need to be washed and go down to the laundry room, really not wanting to leave anything for later knowing that you have busy weeks ahead of you because of college and you want to get everything ready.

You wait for the clothes to be washed and also to dry, then go back to your room and continue organizing everything.

Until the sunset starts to show through your window and realizing that you are not missing anything anymore, you can finally lay down on your bed with Vhagar and rest.

You pick up your phone and begin to entertain yourself with Facebook, Instagram and Twitter, letting the time pass.

Vhagar settles in next to you and you get more comfortable to start watching Tiktoks, entertaining yourself for another good time.

You think to yourself that maybe later you'll go downstairs to buy something from the vending machine and watch a movie or maybe a series until you fall asleep, sounding like an awesome plan for you.

Then you finally get up, grab your most comfortable clothes and take a bath. It doesn't take you long and you dry your hair, then you feed Vhagar and take money to go buy food and watch the movie or series.

When suddenly there is a knock on your door.

You watch it in silence, thinking confused that you are not expecting anyone. And you have no idea who it could be. You didn't agree with your friends that they would come here later if you've already seen each other in the morning.

You check your messages to see if any of your friends told you they were coming to visit you unexpectedly, but nothing.

So you go to open the door thinking that it must be one of your friends and they decided not to tell you about coming over, but when you open your door you didn't expect it to be your ex-best friend, Aemond.

You freeze the moment you see him, definitely not expecting it.

As his gaze lights up when he sees you and the two of you are face to face after what felt like an eternity of the two of you not seeing each other.

You unconsciously take a step back, surprised and confused, your lips parted, as he watches you intently, almost with a hopeful look, maybe because he's afraid you'll slam the door in his face.

But you don't move from shock because you didn't expect it to be him and you didn't expect to see him so suddenly after so many months.

And he… hasn't changed.

You know it's only been months, there's not much difference, but it's the same appearance since the last time you saw him. His hair is still short to your surprise and his clothing style is the same.

What you do notice are the muscles on his arms are more pronounced and you also get the impression that he is a little taller.

While you… what can you say about yourself? Really nothing.

The only new thing you've done is to start trotting in the mornings, also your hair is short below your shoulders when before you had it down to your waist and you've put more earrings in both ears.

And neither of you say anything.

The two of you are simply inspecting each other after a long time without seeing each other, you mostly feeling just as confused to see him here.

You really don't understand how he is here. Or rather how he knew you were already back.

He certainly couldn't have known, you still have him blocked from all your social media networks.

Then….?

You ask yourself but the answer comes to you in a second.

Aegon.

You think in affirmative mode. And also probably Helaena because the three of you met at the restaurant. But you know it was Aegon who must have told him everything.

You don't doubt that maybe Hel wanted to kill him.

When after a few more seconds, the two of them not speaking and just watching each other, you finally react, instantly feeling nervous, without really knowing why.

Also that little remorse comes to your chest for everything that happened between you and what happened the last time you saw each other, remembering everything you told him crying.

You hug yourself and bite the inside of your cheek, also as he is looking at you, remembering his girlfriend, the ball and also your birthday.

When he speaks first.

"Hi."

He says to you letting out a sigh afterwards, stirring in front of you, keeping his hands in his jacket pockets, which are movements you know he does when he's nervous.

Also his look tells you he's a bit worried and anxious, but he still stands tall in front of you, his lilac eye watching you intently and having a slight gleam in it.

And his sapphire in your direction… it looks just as beautiful and stunning as ever.

"Hi."

You answer him with your tone of voice a little lower and feeling a little uncomfortable, puzzled, but you also stand firm in front of him, feeling nervous.

You certainly weren't prepared for when this moment happened and you know he wasn't either, yet here he is.

"W-what are you doing here?"

You ask trying not to let your voice sound shaky, holding back.

He swallows hard and looks away from you for a moment while he presses his lips together, to look at you again with those nerves and that certain hope.

"Actually… I wasn't too sure about coming here," he confesses with a soft look in his eyes, just like his voice, "Aegon told me you had returned to King's Landing and I wanted to see it myself."

At this, you lower your gaze for a moment and bite your lips. Yet… strangely… you don't feel upset.

"He told me by accident and got a good punch from Helaena," he adds and you look at him again.

You don't say anything for a few seconds, just look away from him, swallow hard and let out a long breath.

"Well, it's true, I'm back. If that's all, you can go now…

"Y/N..."

He calls out to you this time hopefully, interrupting you in a quick tone, not wanting to waste the opportunity and clearly not wanting this to be over any faster than he wants it to be.

It's the first time you've seen each other in months and in all these months a lot has happened and he just… wants to try.

It doesn't matter that you in the end don't want to, that you're still upset and don't want to see him, because he will understand and he will finally respect your decision, but he wants to try first.

He doesn't want to leave without trying.

"I know you probably don't want to, because I know you didn't expect to see me and maybe you even want to kick me out…"

He says lowering his gaze for a second, sighing, and then he looks at you again.

"But I want to risk myself," he tells you honestly, "and I'll understand if you say no, truly," he assures you, "I just want to talk to you and after this, if you still don't want me to bother you anymore, then I won't go near you again, I assure you."

He tells you and you remain paralyzed again for a few seconds, listening to him and watching him with your lips parted.

"And if you want me to leave now, I will. But I just want to try…" he lets out a long breath, gathering his courage, "So…. may I come in, please?"

He asks you softly, watching you just the same and almost expectantly, stirring continuously where he stands, knowing full well that he is as nervous as you are, while you have no idea what to do.

Your mind starts thinking fast, considering what you should and shouldn't do.

But the truth is that nothing comes to your mind. You just have a quick, unexpected debate on whether to let him into your room or not.

Vhagar behind you barks twice, watching Aemond very intently, while repeatedly wagging her tail back and forth excitedly and looking very playful.

While Aemond in front of you watches her with excitement and some hope, to again focus on you, ready to face the decision you will make, either yes or no.

And finally after what feels like an eternity, you know that rejecting him is probably the best option, but for some reason… you can't find the courage to do it.

And not because seeing him now in front of you and having heard his words has softened your heart, but because you realize that your heart doesn't hurt like it used to.

Maybe it was all the time you stayed apart and you healed in Highgarden, helped by the change of air, your lifestyle and the new people around you, unconsciously overcoming everything that happened between you, that you don't feel that pain anymore.

However… you do feel a weight. A weight on your shoulders and in your heart.

And it is because of that weight that after considering it in depth, with your soft gaze, you step aside and open the door wider, allowing him the entrance to your room.

Aemond would be lying if at that moment he didn't feel as if he had just received the news that he won the lottery, because surprise overcomes him and also relief.

And not wanting you to take it back, he enters your room, thanking you with his gaze in silence, while you control your nerves and close the door, facing this.

He in an instant is already in Vhagar who eagerly and seemingly happily enjoys being in his arms and licks his hands and cheeks, making him laugh and give her kisses, caressing her.

You can't help but smile a little at the scene, but you are just the same neutral and firm.

When he watches you over Vhagar, he leaves another kiss on her head and sets her back down on your bed, now looking as if he has no idea what to do.

He honestly didn't think it would go this far. He thought you'd slam the door in his face.

But you're both here. Face to face with each other. And certainly with a lot of things to say that you couldn't say to each other before.

"Hmm…" he says, stirring and glancing briefly at your room, "Did I interrupt you with something important?"

He asks and watches you intently, to which you deny, crossing your arms.

"No," you answer softly, "I was just planning to go buy something from the vending machine downstairs and watch something, a movie or a series."

"Oh," he nods, understanding, "well, if you want, I'll go," he offers, "you haven't eaten anything?"

"No. You?"

"I haven't either. But I can go and buy some dinner for both of us, only if you want. There are many restaurants near here."

"Well…

You stir uncomfortably.

"Only if you want."

"Yeah, no problem," he assures you.

And again he leaves you alone in your room saying he will be back soon, making you sigh and sit on your bed with an almost terrified expression… not expecting or understanding any of this.

The fact that he's gone to buy food helps you mentally prepare yourself for when he comes back, having no idea how they'll start talking about everything that happened.

You don't even know what he will tell you first, but you calm down and use the time he has given you to not feel nervous and terrified.

You take a deep breath, you say that everything will be fine, that this shouldn't be awkward… or at least not too awkward and that if both you and he start to feel like it's too much, you can both say so.

And of course you don't want any of this to lead to a fight. It wouldn't be wise and it's totally unnecessary.

When after a few minutes, Aemond returns with Chinese food, soda and fries from the vending machine.

He actually buys you some of your favorite chips and has also ordered you the Chinese food exactly the way you like it. At this you just thank him and both of you settle into your bed.

You put Vhagar down, give him some of her food and the two of you begin to eat.

At first it did feel a little awkward, but then, as you talk about the food being delicious and ask both of you to pass such things around, the mood begins to lighten and it's like going back to when you both lived together.

The two of them are comfortable, eating, talking about anything and watching a movie, although this time there is no movie.

And he is the first to start a conversation.

"How was Highgarden?" he observes you attentively, his gaze soft, interested.

"Incredible," you answer without hesitation.

He nods, as the two of you put more pieces of food in your mouths and then you take a sip from your bottle of soda.

"You told me that's where the best psychology internship programs are, right?"

"Yes," you affirm, "When I found out I got into the exchange program, it was the first place I applied."

"And you didn't have any problems?"

"No," you observe him softly, "Because of my good grades they didn't deny me anything, they gave me one of the first places in internships for Highgarden and everything was a very fast process. And when I got there and met the psychologist in charge of me and his clinic… it was just amazing."

"Yeah," he murmurs, "yeah, I can imagine. And I'm happy for you."

He tells you honestly, with a small smile that you return. A genuine smile from both of us.

"Thank you."

"And how did it all go? What was that you were doing? Did you get to know all of Highgarden too?"

And you tell him everything.

You tell him how your first weeks were, how was your dorm, the university, the new people you met, your internship, Dr. Arthur, what you had to do and you even told him about some very interesting cases.

You also told him about the places you met, showed him pictures and videos. You tell him that you went out partying on a few weekends, all the while he listens to you and watches you with great attention, looking genuinely interested, and asking you more questions.

Until you have nothing more to tell him about your six months at Highgarden.

"What about you? Haven't you started your internship yet?"

You ask him interestedly.

"Yes, since April," he says, "Obviously it wasn't difficult. I'm going to my father's company and I got some of my friends to do their internships there as well.

"Oh," you nod, understanding, "and what do you say?"

"What do I say?" he repeats, letting out a sigh, "well, it's not as interesting as what you told me," he says with a small smile, "It's all finance, paperwork, computer programs and so on. But that's what I like and I've been doing very well."

"Yes," you murmur, looking at a spot in your room, "But it's interesting," you tell him, "I've always thought you'd end up like one of the characters in Succession, someday running your father's important company as a rich and powerful man.

He smiles softly and then looks at you, to which you also smile in his direction.

"Am I right?" you ask him amused.

"In fact yes, you are absolutely right," he assures you in the same way.

There's no more food except for chips and soda, so he then starts talking to you more about his life and everything he's been doing lately besides college and his internship.

All while you both stare at an unimportant spot in your room, side by side, eating junk food.

And you listen to him with close attention, really interested in wanting to know what his life has been like now that you are no longer a part of it.

He tells you about how he has spent more time with his family, he tells you about Daeron, Rhaenyra, Daemon and even his cousins and nephews, Jace, Luke, Joffrey, Baela and Rhaena.

He tells you how they all spent a small part of the summer on Driftmark, an island near Dragonstone where his whole family also has a property right there, but which belongs to his aunt and uncle Rhaenys and Corlys.

You knew about Driftmark, but never in your years of friendship with Aemond did he invite you there because all his family always organized anything in his huge mansion here in King's Landing or in Dragonstone.

He also tells you about upcoming birthdays and everything his mother has planned.

And in everything he talks about, he doesn't mention Alys at all, maybe for fear that you might get upset or uncomfortable and want him to leave, because you don't dare ask him about her either.

You just let him talk to you about the first thing that comes to his mind, both of you comfortable in your bed and still eating junk food.

When Aemond seems to have told you everything and you both stay in a comfortable silence, almost shoulder to shoulder, both of you watching your little room and just letting time pass by.

And that's when Aemond watches you with his soft gaze, while you continue to eat fried food, staring into nothing. He swallows hard and lets out a long breath.

"I owe you an apology."

You freeze for a moment, still looking at everything around you but him, surprised by his words and beginning to understand where this is going.

Unable to help yourself, you look at him and he looks at you with a look that is both serious and gentle, looking honest, only to look away, maybe because of nerves, and continue talking.

"I was a very bad friend to you," he says in a murmur, "what I did to you is something unforgivable, I know, something you didn't deserve," he admits, "I don't expect you to forgive me Y/N, I'm not asking for that, I just want to talk to you and that you listen to me, that….

"I don't want to listen to your apologies only if you say them out of pity, Aemond," you interrupt him, serious.

"What? No, no, this is not for pity, Y/N," he assures you, honest and desperate to clarify, "I never felt pity for you and you know it."

"I don't know," you mutter, "After what happened, you made me doubt if our friendship was genuine or because you wanted and were my friend for pity," you confess.

"Y/N…" he tells you in a sigh, sad, denying, "since you left… since we stopped seeing and talking to each other… you don't know everything I wanted to tell you, everything I wanted to apologize for even if you didn't forgive me."

"Aemond…" you call him cautiously, "you can't apologize to me just to make me forgive you and your girlfriend too, you….

"I broke up with Alys."

He interrupts you with the most honest and quickest sentence he's ever said in all the time you've been together, making you freeze once more and stare at him with your lips parted.

And he watches you with the most honest look, wanting to clarify that point as much as possible and that there is no doubt, even feeling proud to say it.

"I broke up with her days after you left the apartment, and that was the last time we saw each other," he explains, in a low, honest tone.

But even after telling you that, you don't feel entirely confident. That's why you lower your gaze and swallow hard as you consider how strong his relationship was.

"But if you go back with her, I don't….

"No, Y/N," he says to you in denial, "I'm done with her for good," he assures you, "I didn't want to and I don't want to have anything to do with her anymore. I don't care anymore, she's nothing to me and never really was in all the time we were together."

You listen to him surprised, attentive, breathing a little faster than usual, not understanding, while he then starts to tell you everything.

Everything he wanted to tell you since your friendship started to fall apart and the moment it broke.

"Alys managed to get my attention a lot when we first met. She led me to believe on our first few dates that a relationship could be good, healthy and loving. But when we finally formalized everything, she started to show herself as the real person she is when she already had me," he explains, "And I naively gave her everything she asked for, even money, because I was obsessed with her and the way she made me feel. She made me feel so unique, so wanted and so special that I-I just…" he lets out a sigh, "I let her hold me in the palm of her hand."

He brings one of his hands to the nape of his neck, ruffling his short hair with his fingers, feeling strange telling you all this, but also feeling it as a necessity for you to listen and understand him.

And you really don't have any problem, you listen to him carefully and let him tell you everything he wants to tell you, still feeling a little sharp pain in your chest.

"She would even tell me things she didn't agree with or like, either about me or my family, making me feel bad and upset sometimes, but then she would turn them into just a point of view and convince me that I had misunderstood her, when I hadn't," he explains to you, "She told me that my mother was very controlling after she met her, that my siblings, even Helaena, seemed very weird to her, and that Daemon didn't seem like a good person."

You are surprised to hear that and pay more attention, while Aemond feels ashamed of himself for telling you this, but it is the truth.

"In that instant I should have put a stop to her, I know. But like the fucking idiot I am, I kept letting myself be easily manipulated by her, because she kept telling me it was just her first impression and her views," he says in a low, sorrowful whisper, "She just had a long conversation with my father without looking bored. I even noticed she changed her attitude and looked more… kind. But only with him."

He says in a bitter tone, while you understand what he's going on about.

"And of course, how could she not be nicer to him," he says with a smile and a bitter look, "With her about to graduate, she told him about that and also about her internship with the man who owns the most important company in the country. She talked about everything she knows and her skills, almost telling him her entire resume so he would hire her."

Now you let out a long breath, must have imagined it.

You thought Alys had really fallen in love with him. That's what you always thought until today when he gave you the news that he broke up with her months ago and that there was no love in the relationship.

You always thought that no girl could reject Aemond for his personality and his looks, that no one could reject him for being him, for knowing him and in an instant wanting to know more about him.

Because that's how you fell in love with him, you didn't fall in love because of what he had and what he could offer you professionally and economically.

But that was just what caught Alys' attention, not his personality and his heart.

"It also happened that when I would talk to her about my classes or an important project that I had worked hard on and got an excellent grade, she would say that it wasn't enough and that I needed to work harder to earn my father's company. She discredited everything I did, telling me that I had to do more so that someday I could be the boss and both of us could run the company, talking about those kinds of plans and almost assuring me that it would be like that," he says seriously and bitterly, "She insulted my friends, saying that they only cared about parties, that they were alcoholics and did not care about their studies, that they were useless and did not contribute anything to me now and would not do so in the future. She also said that I should have more serious and professional friends around me."

He lets out a long breath, really at that moment with you by your side realizing more how really bad his relationship was, the kind of very nasty girl he had by his side and how very blinded he was.

"The same thing happened with you," he says to you, saddened, "Clearly you know because you heard that conversation."

You bite your lips, remembering how bad she made you feel with her words. And so does he, corroborating with her.

"I owe you more than an apology for that, Y/N," he tells you honestly, "You were right, a best friend doesn't leave her best friend aside and that time I didn't even defend you. I should have stopped her, I should have put myself firm with her… but I didn't." he says apologetic, sad and disappointed, "and I'm very sorry for that."

Then you realize that you can't accept those apologies, because it really hurt you a lot to hear that conversation and that he didn't stand up for you because of the way you are and what you like to do.

If things had been the other way around, you would have defended Aemond with all your might, because he was your best friend.

"She was the reason why I started to leave you aside on weekends, why I gradually left you living alone and also why I didn't take care of Vhagar anymore, because she doesn't like dogs," he says seriously and sighs, "She was also the one who convinced me to take her to the ball and planned everything so I would forget your birthday," he confesses to you, saddened. "She deleted messages from you that morning, she confessed it to me when I confronted her when I realized that your birthday had already passed and that even weeks later she made me stay with her so I wouldn't see you. She also planned that stupid two hour dinner with her parents to delay me so I wouldn't notice and let the whole one night go by."

You bite your lips again, not watching him, feeling the urge to cry remembering that day, your birthday, because he also made you feel so bad during and still after by not getting any explanation from him.

And all because of her. But also for him, because he wouldn't put a stop to it.

"And yet I was still with her…" he says in a sigh, incredulous and disappointed in himself, "Like I said, she had me exactly the way she wanted me to be, and she would convince me otherwise when she didn't like something or made me behave differently than she wanted me to."

He shakes his head, feeling annoyed with himself for allowing it, for having fallen so low, letting himself be moved by her as she wanted, making him start to think that his friends were less important than her, his girlfriend.

That she was more important than Y/N, his best friend, who had always been there for him in very good and very difficult times, leaving her and throwing away their friendship of years for a relationship of months.

"She knew exactly what to do and what to say to make me stay," he murmurs, "But Alys never loved me and never really cared for me. She only cared about me out of interest and wanted to be with me out of the same interest, which was all she cared about."

"Did you love her?"

You dare to ask him without observing him, with a thread of voice, while Aemond at your side watches you for a few moments in silence and with his eye wide open in surprise.

I didn't expect you to ask him that, in fact I didn't expect any questions at all, but despite that, he knows the answer.

He knows it since the last time they both saw each other.

"No."

He respond in a low tone but completely serious and honest, while you dare to observe him surprised, but with an almost expressionless gaze and your lips parted.

"At first I came to have a certain affection for her … but only at first," he confesses, "Then it became that obsession with how she made me feel, but nothing else. I never came to love her and I am very relieved by that."

You take your eyes off him, closing your eyes for a moment, letting go of a long breath.

"And after I didn't see you again and I found out that you had gone on exchange… you don't know how that made me feel, Y/N," he swallows hard, "I had lost one of the most important people in my life. life for a fucking relationship and my own behavior. I wasn't thinking, I was an idiot. And I just wanted to scream and break everything for losing you… for not fixing it sooner."

An ugly and huge lump forms in your throat, observing an unimportant point in your room, your gaze lost and your eyes beginning to fill with tears.

You really didn't want to feel that way, you didn't want his words to soften you up, yet…they did.

But you hold back as much as you can, while Aemond next to you feels the same thing that you are feeling, but he doesn't dare to do anything about it, realizing your state, wanting to give you your space.

When you finally take a deep breath and talk to him even without looking at him.

“I missed you a lot too, Aemond. I missed you throughout your relationship with Alys and after I left to Highgarden. I missed you even when you didn't even deserve it."

You confess in a low and honest murmur, completely drawing his attention, you saying nothing else for a few seconds, swallowing the lump in your throat and completely holding back your tears.

While he listens to you and watches surprised, not expecting that, since he thought that all this time you had been hating him. He even thinks you hate him now.

And yes, if it was something like that, there was hatred, resentment, anger and courage for everything that happened, but even so, you also missed it very much.

You missed him, but you didn't forgive him.

"You also don't know how much I hate myself for ending our friendship, Y/N," he tells you in a sad and regretful whisper.

When you look back at him.

“I cannot forgive you, Aemond. Not yet."

And your words are like a dagger in the heart, a wound that, despite the fact that it hurts, accepts and respects it. He certainly didn't expect you to forgive him, but telling him that you had missed him, too, lit a small spark of hope in him. But it was not like that.

And he really respects it.

He doesn't want to make the same mistakes again, and so he does, feeling less weight on his shoulders, relieved that there aren't all those negative feelings between you anymore.

Nor does he expect that after this, everything will be back to the way it was before, because it won't.. He knows it's impossible. And if everything really ends between you both, then he will respect that too.

That's why he nods in your direction, both of you looking into each other's eyes, a understanding look and a small, soft, closed-mouthed smile on his lips, letting you know he's perfectly fine with that.

"Yes, i know," he assures you softly. “It's alright, I understand."

You nod gently in his direction, also placing a small gentle smile and both of you take your gazes away from each other and immersing in a comfortable silence.

Comfortable because finally neither of you feels that weight anymore and everything seems to be… fine.

Both of you have already said everything you wanted to say.

Or almost.

Because in the middle of that silence, Aemond starts thinking fast, having an indecisive debate in his mind, telling himself that enough has been enough, that everything is fine between you now and he doesn't want to ruin it.

But his heart tells him to do it, that there is still more.

While you by his side take your bottle of soda and take a sip, comfortable, this feeling good, but also knowing that this does not mean that the two will resume their friendship.

But for the moment… you enjoy it. You enjoy the moment.

And that's when he speaks again.

"After you left King's Landing…

He starts and you watch him, getting your attention.

"Helaena told me something," let out a long breath, "Something that made me finally realize my feelings and that made me have a little hope, even though you were already gone."

You are still watching him with attention, not having the slightest idea that it could be that what his sister told him, when Aemond looks up at you and looks into your eyes with his soft and honest gaze.

"She told me that you're in love with me."

Your hands become paralyzed first, you stop drinking soda and then your whole body is the one that is motionless, while you observe it with your lips between open, with your confused, attentive and nervous look at the same time.

You don't understand anything.

It's not like you told Helaena about it, in fact no one knows.

And it only makes you feel more nervous that Aemond is there, right next to you, acting completely normal about it, now that he already knows, continuing to observe you in the same way.

But you can't speak, you're still in shock, starting to feel like your pulse is racing too fast.

"She told me that you didn't tell her anything, that she just… knows," he says to you later, still in a soft tone, still making you panic.

You turn your gaze away from him, blink several times, starting to react from panic and nerves and hold your drink tightly.

"You should go."

It's all you say in a thread of voice, not daring to look him in the eye any more and you quickly get up from your bed, wanting to put as much distance as possible between the two of you.

You take Aemond by surprise, who stands up slightly, watching you worried, desperate and a little confused as you go to your door.

When his next words cause you to become paralyzed again, tensing up completely.

"I'm in love with you, too."

He says to you almost desperately, wanting to clarify as soon as possible, watching you attentively and cautiously, slowly getting out of bed to address you very carefully, not wanting to upset you more.

And he begins to explain to you with his soft tone, waiting for the moment so that he turns to you and can talk to you in the eyes, wanting you to see how very honest he is being with you.

"I don't know since when exactly, Y/N. It was probably before we graduated from high school," he lets you know, "That's why I asked you to live with me, because I certainly wouldn't have asked just anyone, and I-I… wanted to be close to you, almost all the time."

Your pulse continues to race, listening to his words carefully, feeling again the urge to cry, even without daring to look at him face to face.

"And all those dates, all those girls I went out with or flirted with at parties…" he sighs, "I told myself that I didn't get any further with them because it just hadn't worked out, when the truth is that I was fooling myself and it was me who didn't take them any further… because they weren't you."

He confesses to you and that's when you can't take it anymore and the first tears fall, starting to shake and with the realization starting to become clear to you as you hear it.

"And I wanted to repress my feelings for you with them, I wanted to fall in love with someone because I didn't want to ruin our friendship, Y/N," he tells you honestly, "And I know it sounds stupid and it's probably tired of hearing it already… but it's the truth. You don't know how much I was terrified of losing you, of losing our friendship because of feelings that weren't reciprocated… or that I thought weren't reciprocated."

Then slowly, Aemond, dares to raise his hand and gently touch your arm, turning you towards him very carefully and tactfully, needing to see you and needing you to see him.

And you let him.

Shaking, but you let him.

And his heart breaks the moment he sees you, with your sad, surprised face, your teary eyes and red cheeks, watching him as if he can't believe it.

"I wish I had known, Y/N," he says softly, watching you with all the love and gentleness in the world, "Because then Alys came, a girl with a personality I hadn't met before, pretending to be a good person and she made me distract myself from you by falling into her games."

You bite your lips, holding back the tears as much as you can, while he continues talking to you and explaining with all the sincerity in the world.

"And I know I was very selfish with all those girls and also with you when I saw you with that guy at that party, having a good time and having fun without me," he confesses with regret, "You don't know how upset I was and how terribly jealous I felt, Y/N. That was when I thought I had lost you for good and I hated myself not only for having ended our friendship, but also for never having confessed my feelings to you and realizing too late… what I lost for a person who wasn't worth it."

He lets out a long breath, biting the inside of his cheek and watching you with all the sincerity, love and affection as he says his next words.

"I love you, Y/N. I have always loved you. Just in the same way you love me…. or loved me," he corrects with a soft sad tone, "I was just too much of a coward to tell you and I didn't give you a chance to tell me either by going out and pretending with all those girls," he lowers his gaze, "I'm sorry."

Then, it's like you're living in a dream.

You don't know if it's real or not.

But you know it's real because of his touch on your arm and the closeness between the two of you, with him looking at you like that, being so terribly honest that it scares you.

It scares you because this is just what you wanted to hear.

This is everything you wanted to hear from him towards you, being just another one of your most pathetic and impossible dreams. But here you are. He has told you.

And that's exactly why you can't control it anymore and right there, in front of him, you lose it completely and the first sob escapes your lips, just as your tears are rushing down your cheeks.

You cover your face completely ashamed, crying, only you don't know if it's from happiness or sadness… or probably both.

But you know you cry because this is what you have been longing to hear for a very long time and you cry wondering why now, why now that things between you are no longer bad but not quite right either.

But mostly you cry because you feel confused.

Since you left King's Landing, one of your purposes was to leave him behind and forget, to undo those feelings for him. But you couldn't.

You still love him.

You love your best friend just the same way he loves you too, being something that was going on for a long time, simultaneously, but without both of you knowing it.

And you feel confused because you don't know if you should finally take this thing you've always wanted, you don't know because of everything that happened, even though he has already explained and apologized to you.

But you don't feel totally confident because he really hurt you so much.

And you don't know if what happened, will happen again and that's just what you don't want. You don't want him to hurt you again.

And Aemond, surprised by your behavior, yet he understands you and doesn't judge you.

That's why he wastes no time and pulls you into a gentle, firm and comforting embrace, letting himself be carried away by his feelings as well.

And you don't push him away. You let him hold you and lock you in his arms, just like you loved him to do when you lived together or saw each other during the day because his hugs have always comforted you and made you feel safe.

And that's also where you can let out your feelings.

He starts to comfort you too with soft words in your ear, stroking your hair with his hand, telling you that it's okay, that everything is fine, that this shouldn't change anything either, that you are the one who has the last word about the two of you.

As he continues to apologize for everything in soft murmurs, holding you tightly against him, not letting you go until you are well.

Until little by little, your sobs begin to decrease and you begin to calm down, sniffling your nose and still hugging him, taking all the time you need until your whole roller coaster of emotions stops.

Aemond doesn't let go, but does so slowly as you begin to stir, watching you intently and worriedly.

You bring your hands to your cheeks, wiping away your tears and sniffling your nose, to which he quickly runs his thumbs over your cheeks as well, still watching you with all that tenderness, that understanding and that affection.

"Are you all right, my pretty one? Do you need anything?"

You deny, again embarrassed, but at least feeling better and less emotional.

"N-no. I'm just… sorry, it wasn't m-my inte…

"Shh, no, it's okay," he interrupts you softly, "it's okay. This was my fault, I never meant to make you react like this. I should have been more careful with you."

"It wasn't that, Aemond," you confess, sniffling once more, "You took me by surprise, that's all. And I-I c-couldn't control myself, i-it was too much."

"Yes, I know, I know, pretty one. It's all right, everything's all right."

And again he pulls you into a soft, comforting embrace that you allow, now no longer feeling like those earlier hugs where before between the two of you there was the word friendship.

Now it's something more… something more intimate and more… honest.

And that's because both of you finally know each other's true feelings.

But still… after this, what you need is time. And that's exactly what you're asking for.

i couldn't tag many of you and I apologize if you asked me to tag you and I didn't, I could have missed your user but thank u so much for reading 😢❤

tag list:

@winxschester @namoreno @fan-goddess @lauftivy @bellameshipper @iloveallmyboys @barnes70stark @amazingnerd @yentroucnagol @helaenaluvr @almostpurplelady @lilitheal @targaryenmoony @dangerousstateofmind @summerposie

[ninoochat]

did mickey knew ian was gay before they hooked up? *cracks knuckles* alright sit down let's unpack this shit because yesterday for dinner ive had 4 snickers and im still not down from that sugar high. shutup

in 1x6 he's waiting outside kash and grab to beat up ian. why is he nervous? he beat up lip a few days ago, he beats up dudes on the regular. s1 ian isnt exactly intimidating (sorry ian). is he wary of linda because she has more balls than her husband? sure but he wouldn't be smoking and biting his nails. as a former smoker and nail biter, you don't usually do both unless you’re S T R E S S E D. he’s there alone this time. why did he call off his cousins? maybe stalking the store so much made him notice what was going on with kash *spits on the ground*. maybe he overheard when ian told mandy he was gay right outside their house in 1x3. i don't think mandy told him but she could have.

so back to 1x6. mickey cleans up (a little) and goes to the store to provoke ian. "i forgot the dip" no you didnt, you just needed an excuse to go back in because ian showed up. ian says to kash *burns sage to cleanse myself* "what, so you're just going to let him keep coming in here, and take what he wants?" uh oh actually, yes he will! oops getting sidetracked. mickey tells him "you know where i live if you have a problem". *gestures vaguely* if not gay then why everything? to me, this is textbook boy at school pulling on pigtails and running because he has a big crush. and i mean how many opportunities are there for a closeted gay kid in this neighborhood? ian is cute as a button, he's probably checked him out. "where's firecrotch?!" sir have you put much thoughts into that part of his anatomy? we know he likes redheads...

fast forward to 1x7, that scene (changed my life tbh). mickey's probably loving how fearless ian is. there's only so much grunting and physical contact he can take before he folds (ask ancient romans). he's about 16 in season 1, he's probably climbing up the walls horny and ian gave him the look™ (ian u big hoe) and yet i firmly believe he would have never made a move if he didn't know. hell no, no way! and risk having ian yell something with terry in the next room? with how terrified he is about his father?

what do you think? did he know or did he just went for it?

[lazycats-stuff]

Ok this one is mainly for Alfred but u could add batbros and batdad if u want, anyways i was wondering what would alfred (or any of the fam) do to stop BatToddler reader tantrum? Like i imagine the setting would be grocery shopping and Alfred's only getting healthy food including boring plain cereal and BatToddler is not having it and only wants sugar loaded cereal and starts whining and tearing up right there in the middle of the store, would alfred give in to those tears or find an alternative? I imagine batdad would give in and the brothers might even encourage it giving that they probably eat the same junk food

Oh my God yes! Anon, thank you for sending me this, this sounds so fun. Alfred needs love so this is Alfred centered, but I will put this in batfam since I'm to lazy to create a new page for the masterlist. It's a bit short, but my arm hurts.

Summary: Alfred has to make a deal with his grandson

Warnings: nothing really, (Y/N) crying, but it's short...

Alfred Pennyworth is a man of many talents. He may look like an ordinary butler to the public, but without him, the Wayne family wouldn't even function. He is the person who makes sure everyone eats, sleeps and somehow functions like a human being. Somewhat.

Some may find it tiring, but Alfred wouldn't have it any other way. He really wouldn't have it any other way at all. Of course, his grandkids so to speak were independent and didn't need anyone looking over them 24/7. That was until (Y/N) came as a baby.

Alfred nearly passed out when they got the call. (Y/N)'s mom abandoned him and just signed off her parental rights and Bruce had realized he had a kid. A baby, defenseless little creature who is untouched by the world. Untouched.

That's something that scared him.

But he knew that Bruce and him had to step up when it came to this little child. They really had to step up as caregivers. Of course, another problem was the press, pushing and prodding. Bruce hated it and told them that there were going to be consequences if they think about photographing his son.

If they did go out, (Y/N)'s face was covered by Bruce and or one of the boys who went with Bruce that day. Gotham citizens, the ones not included in the press, loved the little baby and were happy to him in public. Of course, that may sound weird, but the Wayne family is loved in Gotham and everyone just loves every single member.

In fact, the news of a new member, a baby member, broke the internet and Gotham in general.

Even Metropolis wrote about it.

And there was one thing that Bruce promised to himself. He would be present and he would try to balance everything. Batman, Bruce and the CEO of Wayne Enterprises. Alfred and the rest of the boys were more than happy to babysit and (Y/N) was never going to be at fault for love or affection. Never.

And Alfred made sure he is well fed. And also, Alfred made sure it was healthy. His grandson needed to be healthy. Of course, there could some sugar here and there, but not all the time. Sugar from fruits is more than welcome, but sugar like in cereal? Alfred had put a restriction on it.

At least for now. (Y/N) didn't need a sugar boost just yet. Only natural sugars while he is so young. Bruce agreed. They would introduce him to the sugars gradually. Bruce relayed that to his sons and every son agreed.

No processed sugar while he is so young.

3 years have passed since (Y/N) came to live them and life was going great. (Y/N) has started kindergarten and was happy. He loved his brothers a lot and his father, but he loved his grandpa the most. Bruce's working theory was the fact that Alfred cooked the most and often made tasty foods for (Y/N).

None the less, (Y/N) loved the others very much and that was undeniable.

One thing that Alfred loved doing was taking (Y/N) to the store whenever he could. (Y/N) was just in love with the activity. It was fun seeing new things and bright colors. Alfred enjoyed since (Y/N) held the list while shopping and he didn't have to worry about it.

Although there is one single issue. (Y/N) has a sweet tooth. A really big one, especially for a child his age. So Alfred often had to bypass the cereal aisle and aisles that contained candy.

It would not be a pleasant sight. But Jason and the others want cereal and they will lose their minds if they don't get it. So what does Alfred do?

He goes to the aisle, preparing himself mentally.

This could turn into a battle.

Alfred took a right and started looking through the cereal. He looked at some healthy cereal and (Y/N) was reaching for Coco Puffs. Alfred saw it and moved (Y/N) away.

(Y/N) didn't like that.

" Alfred. " (Y/N) whined and Alfred raised his brow.

" Yes, master (Y/N)? " Alfred asked as he put the healthy version inside the cart.

" Coco Puffs. " (Y/N) said pointing at the cereal. Alfred smiled and shook his head.

" I'm afraid that I can't get you that master (Y/N). " Alfred said and he sighed when he saw tears in (Y/N)'s eyes.

He picked his grandson up into his arms from the cart. " Master (Y/N), don't cry. " Alfred said as he rocked him.

" But I want Coco Puffs. " (Y/N) whined and some tears fell down his cheeks.

" Oh darling... " Alfred whispered and kissed his cheek, trying to comfort him.

" How about we make a deal? " Alfred suggested and (Y/N) calmed down a little bit and looked at him in curiosity.

" You will have to eat the vegetables I give you. "

(Y/N) opened his mouth to protest, but stopped himself. Did he like vegetables? No. But he did like his Coco Puffs.

" All of them? " (Y/N) asked quietly.

" Yes. I know you are not a fan of vegetables, but I need you to be healthy. " Alfred said as he kissed his cheek once again.

" And then I'll get my cereal? " (Y/N) asked and Alfred nodded.

" We got a deal. " (Y/N) said and Alfred smile, kissing his cheek again.

" Good. " Alfred says and puts the box into the cart. " You can have one bowl a day. " Alfred said as he put (Y/N) down in the cart's seat for children.

" Cross off cereal master (Y/N) please. " Alfred said and pointed at the word. (Y/N) crossed it off and smiled happily.

" Now, let me see what else I have. " Alfred said and saw what else is on the list.

" We have one more thing left and then we can go home. " Alfred said and patted (Y/N)'s head.

(Y/N) just nodded and kicked his little legs happily. Alfred saw that (Y/N) often glanced at the Coco Puffs and made sure that they were in the cart.

" They won't be going anywhere master (Y/N). "

(Y/N) let out a little humph and smiled none the less.

" I have to make sure. "

Alfred laughed at the response he got as he moved the cart through the aisles. " The box won't walk away anywhere. " Alfred explained as he put the last thing in the cart.

" Cross off this word please. " Alfred said as he pointed at the last word on the list.

(Y/N) nodded and crossed it out. " Good job. " Alfred praised his grandson and made his way to the cash register. This was not so bad like Alfred thought it would be.

And the deal was nice.

[sirenedeslily]

𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐌𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐀 𝐒𝐀𝐈𝐋𝐎𝐑 ‎𐦍 𝐜hristopher 𝐬turniolo

❤︎ ⸻ ❝ and when you get a taste, can you tell me, what’s my flavour? ❜ ꔛ 𓈒 *⊹˚

𝐢𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 the siren, cursed by the sea and feared by the world, never imagined love could find her—until chris did. in his eyes, she wasn’t a creature of the depths but a soul worth saving. their love, tender and fleeting, was a defiance of fate, a brief escape from the doom that lingered. but when the sea came for her, leaving only her lifeless body on the shore, chris was left devastated. consumed by grief, he could not let her go, forever haunted by her memory, bound to the tragic final moment where love slipped through his fingers.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠, yet another angst, death, grief and loss, graphic descriptions, no happy ending, fluff if u squint extra hard, murder (not too descriptive), cannibalism, little use of religious imagery

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭, 1.4k !

the sea had always been your sanctuary — the only place where the noise in your head dulled, where the weight of your existence didn’t press so heavily on your chest. it whispered to you, sang lullabies that spoke of ancient things, terrible and beautiful. you had known it as a mother once, in those distant days before you ever met chris, back when you believed the power inside you was a curse. the world told you as much. sailors spoke in hushed voices, warning of the danger your kind carried — the siren’s voice, the venomous kiss, the fatal call.

but then he found you. a boy so out of place on the shore, like some wayward sailor who didn’t belong on the sand. his eyes didn’t hold fear when they met yours, though they should have. you were dangerous; you knew that, and yet something in the way he looked at you made you forget. you felt like something else entirely when he was near — a girl, a soul, a human being capable of being loved. and in those fleeting moments, he made you believe that you were more than what the sea had made you.

you had asked him once, in the quiet hours of the night when the stars hung low and the moon bathed your bodies in silver light, what it was that he saw in you. his answer had been simple, too simple for the enormity of what it meant.

“i see you,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “not what you think you are, not what they say you are — just you. and that’s enough.”

that was the first night he kissed you. it was gentle at first, hesitant, like he was testing the waters, unsure if you would pull away, unsure if the world would let him hold you like this. but you kissed him back with a hunger that startled even you, like you had been starving all your life and didn’t know it until you tasted his lips.

you felt alive for the first time in so long, as if his touch had ignited something deep within you. his hands were warm on your skin, and when he whispered your name, it felt like a prayer. you kissed him like he was your salvation, like you could drown in him and be saved all the same. kiss me like a sailor, you had begged him once, your voice rough, trembling with need, and he had laughed, pulling you close, promising you that he would never leave, that you were his anchor, that he would keep you tethered to the shore no matter what storms came.

but promises are fragile things, easily broken by the cruel hands of fate.

that last night together had been so perfect it felt like a dream. you had lain in his arms on the sand, the two of you wrapped in each other beneath the blanket of stars. you talked for hours, your words flowing like the tide, easy and full of a kind of hope you hadn’t known before. you whispered about a life far from the sea, away from the curse that hung over your head. he spoke of places you had never seen, of cities filled with people who didn’t fear sirens, of a world where you could walk hand in hand without anyone looking twice.

“we’ll run away,” he had said, his breath warm against your neck. “somewhere far from here. i’ll take you where the sea can’t reach us.”

and for the first time, you had let yourself believe him. you had let yourself dream of a future where you weren’t bound to the water, where you could be free to love him without fear, without the shadow of death looming over you. you had fallen asleep in his arms that night, lulled by the sound of his heartbeat, a rhythm steady and sure as the waves themselves.

but the sea does not forgive its children for leaving. it never does.

when chris left the next morning, the sun barely cresting the horizon, he had kissed you like he always did, with that quiet intensity that made you feel like you were the center of his universe. “i’ll be back before you know it,” he promised, brushing a strand of hair from your face. “don’t go anywhere without me.”

and then he was gone, his figure disappearing into the distance, swallowed by the morning mist. you sat by the shore, watching the waves lap at the sand, feeling that familiar pull in your chest, the one that reminded you that you didn’t belong here. not in this world, not with him. you were born of the sea, and no matter how much you wanted to escape it, it would always call you back.

you didn’t see the sailors coming. maybe you had let your guard down, lulled into a false sense of security by chris’s love. or maybe you had always known this was how it would end. either way, when their hands grabbed you, rough and unforgiving, you didn’t scream. you didn’t fight. you let them drag you into the water, their voices harsh in your ears, accusing you of crimes you had never committed, sins that had been written into your skin before you were even born.

they didn’t care who you were. to them, you were just a monster. a siren who lured men to their deaths, a creature who deserved nothing more than to be drowned in the very sea that had birthed you.

when they were done, they left you there, your body half-submerged in the water, broken and bloodied, the life slowly seeping out of you as the tide pulled you deeper into its embrace. you felt the sea take you back, the waves cradling you like a mother returning for her lost child, and in your final moments, you wondered if chris would come back in time to find you.

but you knew, even then, that it was too late.

when chris returned, the beach was eerily quiet. the sun had long since risen, but there was no warmth in the air, only the cold bite of the wind and the taste of salt on his lips. he called your name, his voice trembling with a fear he had never known before, a fear that gripped his chest and refused to let go.

and then he saw you.

your body, still and pale, the water lapping gently at your feet, your hair spread out like seaweed on the sand. he ran to you, his heart pounding in his chest, his breath coming in ragged gasps. he fell to his knees beside you, his hands shaking as he reached for you, pulling you into his arms, cradling your lifeless form against his chest.

“no, no, please…” his voice cracked, a sob tearing from his throat as he pressed his forehead against yours. “please, don’t leave me. don’t leave me.”

but you were already gone.

he held you for what felt like hours, his tears mixing with the saltwater that clung to your skin. he kissed your lips, your cheeks, your hands, desperate to feel some spark of life in you, some sign that you were still there, that you hadn’t been taken from him. but there was nothing. only the cold, empty shell of the girl he had loved.

and then, in the quiet of his grief, something broke inside him. a madness, a desperation, a need to hold on to you in any way he could. he kissed your shoulder, softly at first, his lips brushing over your skin as if he could still be gentle with you. but then the hunger came. the need to consume, to make you a part of him forever. he bit down, his teeth sinking into your flesh, the taste of you filling his mouth — salt, blood, the sea. you were his now. his, in a way that death could never take from him.

and as he pulled back, his breath ragged, his heart shattered, he knew that he would never be the same. the sea had claimed you, but he had claimed you, too. you would live inside him, in the darkest corners of his soul, in the places where light could never reach.

the tide rolled in, indifferent to the tragedy that had unfolded on its shores, and the sky darkened as the sun dipped below the horizon. but chris stayed there, holding you close, his lips stained with your blood, his heart heavy with the weight of a love that had been doomed from the start.

and in the distance, the sea whispered your name, a lullaby meant only for him.

𝒊𝒏 𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒚 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒔𝒆 𝒘𝒉𝒐 𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒔𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒆𝒂,

who loved like waves,

and left like tides,

forever pulled

by what they could not escape.

𝒢𝜚 💭 ࣪ ✸ 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 ∿ matt’s been suffering so bad in my fics it was about time chris got his share of trauma :3 hoping this wasn’t too sucky and similar to my last stuff, i feel like i’m missing creativity

❝ 𝟐𝟐𝟐 ❞ 𝑻𝑨𝑮𝑳𝑰𝑺𝑻, @carvedtits @et6rnalsun @wovenribbons @flouvela @eternaldecisions @elizabebabe

❝ 𝟑𝟑𝟑 ❞ 𝑻𝑨𝑮𝑳𝑰𝑺𝑻, @l34n @sturniolossss @lovingregulusblack @cl1tlover3000 @mattslolita @mattssgf @le4hsblog @brvtall @mattscoquette @chratts-left-ball @jetaimevous @angelesqve @starlace111 @fawnchives @starkeyszn @etherealval @slut4chriss @star-yawnznn @nickmillersn1gf

© sirenedeslily

[apollo1three]

Hello! can I plz request the obey me bros with their children, you can choose if u want them to be their daughter, son or multiple. i just really wanna see them as like dads, like a scenario maybe when they learn to walk or say their first word you dnt have to if you don't want to! and if it's too much can i have just Beel Mammon or Lucifer :3

AHH MY FIRST REQUEST!!! I’m sorry for taking so long! I haven’t checked my dusty musty crusty a$$ inbox in a while ;-; also nonnie u don’t understand how much I love domestic, sappy, fluffy af stuff like this <3<3

Ofc I’ll do all of em, but I’ll do them in parts so you don’t have to wait for me to finish all seven ^^

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An unimaginable type of love (Lucifer x f!reader)

The demon brothers with their babies (1/7)

Demons are not born, he once told you; they manifest – either as a product of great sin or demonic energy. Demons do not feel the need to procreate, they cannot- they do not get pregnant, and they certainly do not give birth.  

So how is it that the Morningstar finds himself staring down into sparkling crimson eyes, reminiscent of the deep shade of his, with a softness akin to yours? How is it that he cradles a squirming bundle made from the love between him and his human wife?

With a life only ever dedicated to servitude, Lucifer would’ve never dreamt of creating a family of his own. Never in his time in the celestial realm would he have imagined small, fragile little arms, reaching out for him to hold them in his. Never could he have imagined the possibility of a being regarding him in the sentiment with which he had once regarded Him.

He eyes your sleeping form, snuggled into the comfort of the large bed, and he’s overcome with a fondness that words could not explain the level of. To be loved unconditionally by you, and to be given the most precious gift of all. What had he done to deserve such a thing? - something that was once an unfathomable idea - did he deserve it?

He cradles his daughter in his arms, stroking her little face, and the giggle she lets out is so precious, so much like you, and has him nuzzling his nose into her puffed up little cheeks. You had once light-heartedly complained to him about carrying her in your stomach for nine months, only to have her come out identical to him. Though he'd never admit it, your husband was proud of the notion (at the time, you swore you could see puffed up feathers behind his form), but it was irrefutable how the child carried herself with a poise that was undeniably like yours: a mischievous, yet endearing glint in her eyes that surely meant trouble in the foreseeable future. Lucifer didn’t mind, though.

He mutters, “my darling, what are you doing up so late at night?”, to which his only response is a squeal and few kicks of tiny feet. He tuts back, playfully. “So noisy, my love. Won’t you let your mother sleep?”

There’s a slight breeze from the open balcony, and he gets up from his side of the bed with your daughter rocking gently in his grasp. “Let’s go outside for a bit, come now.”

The way he carries her is careful, protective, and much more assured than the way he had first carried her after her birth. He wasn’t used to dealing with humans, let alone any living thing, in their infancy. Angels and demons did not have an infantile period, and it shook him inwardly the first time he held her, so small and breakable. You, a fully grown human woman, were fragile enough as is ��� but a human infant? It took some stern reassurance that the child he considered so small and breakable was his just as much as she was yours for his paranoia to waver.

‘She’s ours, Lu.’

(Fatherhood. Such a human experience, and he had only you to thank for it.)

Ushering to the Devildom fireflies, she blows raspberries that makes him want to litter his daughter in even more kisses. So he does, far more unreserved than if it were in front of you (while he loved you and trusted you with his heart and soul, showcasing such unabashed doting was still awkward for new to him). So disgustingly affectionate; the past him would’ve laughed at the notion of such outwards display of emotion directed towards anyone or anything – a hit to his pride, to the very thing he embodied. But to the him right now, such a thought never even crossed his mind.

“Do you see that, my love? Aren’t they pretty?”, he smiles softly, tenderly, eyes creasing at the corners. He pokes at her mouth, now endlessly razzing. “Alright, who taught you to do that? Was it Uncle Mammon? Belphie?"

To the him right now, his pride was in the form of his beautiful wife, and his darling little girl.

“Daddy will always protect you two, I swear on it.”

Absentmindedly stroking her head, a thousand thoughts run through his head. He contemplates heading back inside as the wind picks up, worried you might be getting cold. You’ve been all over the baby since she arrived (and even before then, too), insisting that her crib be placed in the both of your bedroom (much to Asmodeus’s chagrin, adamant that your old room would make the most beautiful human-realm-esque nursery) – while your motherliness was extremely attractive (or rather, all of you), and despite your daughter being an unusually well-behaved little thing, you deserved some quality rest.

He heads back, moving to lower her into her pink-embellished, Avatar of Lust™, crib, but freezes.

“Da..da!”

His movements are miniscule, microscopic, as he looks down at the cooing and giggling tot.

“Say- say that again, darling.”

“Dada!”

Time seems to slow, and he’s overcome with so much fondness, so much love.

“Haha! That’s right, here’s Dada..!” He practically throws her up into the air, accompanied by more squeaky giggles, and if anyone asks: no- his eyes don’t water (it’s merely the brightness of the Devildom moon).

Amidst childish laughter, she says it once more.

He lets out a shaky laugh of disbelief. His eyebrows are furrowed, and there's an uncharacteristically toothy grin on his face. Slowly, trembling hands (a fault of the temperature, obviously, despite him once mentioning the immunity of demons to things as 'trivial' as the weather) press his daughter's small body to his chest.

His daughter. His. His daughter. His wife. His brothers. His family.

It was then that he realised, although perhaps he had always known, that the love he felt for you and the life the two of you had created was different from His love. It was unconditional. The sort of love that allowed him to understand Lilith, the sort of love that he would gladly die for, kill for, be destroyed for. The sort of love that was once unattainable, unimaginable, was now closer than ever.

Lucifer wanted to share this moment with you.

“M-MC!”

[cheegu3]

Enhypen - the glory (part 11, finale)

summary; after rejecting one of the most popular boys at your new school, you soon realised that you'd done the gravest mistake of your life; these weren't ordinary boys, and now they were set on making your life a living hell - heavily based on the kdrama with the same name

warnings; yandere themes, kidnapping, domestic violence, sexual assault accusation,

genre; yandere

wc; 10k

pairing; enha x f.m reader

note; longer note at the very end, thank you so much for reading and going on this journey with me for my full-length series, love u !!🤍🤍

masterlist

You remained frozen in your spot until the car's sound slowly disappeared. What broke you out of your trance was the raspy, struggling breaths that came from the floor a few meters away.

It took a long time to unglue your shoes from the hardwood floor; it felt like you were stuck to it and would stay like that forever, unable to move out of fear. When you eventually succeeded, you turned bit by bit to face Jake.

His sluggish eyes had never left you. They were begging silently for you to make a choice - save him or leave him?

It seemed like he had already guessed what you would choose. More fresh tears slowly slid down his paling skin and his eyes finally looked away when he started sniffling again. 

You watched him, feeling very conflicted on the inside. You wondered if he felt bad for everything he had done, if he would change if you saved him, or if he would continue the same way as before.

There was also some fear on your part. Why were you hesitating about a life? It was your bully, but it was still another person like you. Playing God wasn’t something that was right, was it?

So why did you want him to die? All you saw when looking at the writhing, pathetic struggling human on the floor was Jake; you couldn’t see another person who deserved to be saved, who was empathetic and kind and sweet.

And that scared you. What would Soobin think of you if you told him that? He had already expressed how he thought you were changing. This wasn’t like you. The old you would’ve rushed to call an ambulance, heart drumming in your chest with adrenaline and panic at the thought of someone dying in front of you and knowing you could’ve changed the outcome.

But the new you? Didn’t feel much when looking at him except for very small pity. He hadn’t even betrayed his friends yet he would get killed by them - the ones he probably cherished and trusted most. The worst part was how Jungwon hadn’t even hesitated. Nothing was behind those eyes when he delivered a killing blow to his best friend of years.

Just like the tears running down Jake’s face, you were aware of time running out. Then, you made a choice.

You walked out just in time to see the ambulance near in the distance - technically you hadn’t saved him, but you gave him and God the choice of whether to survive the trip to the hospital…or not.

You refused to change into a heartless person. That wasn’t who you were no matter how much they’d hurt you.

*******

You had three days to think of something. Three days was a very long time in a case like this, but also not enough time.

Standing out in the cold you watched the ambulance leave and took out your phone. No taxis would come out to that place especially not at that hour. So you did the only thing you could think of - call your dad.

‘’ Y/n! Oh, I was so worried about you. ‘’

You scoffed, ‘’ Yeah, right. I need you to do me a favor, it’s the least you can do after going behind my back. ‘’

‘’ Okay…what do you want me to do? ‘’

‘’ Come get me. I’m at Soobin’s cabin which is about an hour or two from the city. I’ll text you the address. ‘’

You hung up before hearing his answer. Being curt and stern would probably make him more likely to do it since he could feel you keeping a distance and being cold. Maybe he thought you’d soften if he followed through, but he couldn’t be more wrong.

Waiting for your dad took too long, so you hesitantly turned back towards the cabin again. You wanted to go back, bask in the warmth, and maybe even rest since you had rejected sleep many times during the long day. However, the closer you got to the cabin, the more your brain started showing the scenes that would await you if you entered; the blood and the memories accompanying it.

Before you had even made up your mind, your feet seemed to have dragged you to the door on their own. Taking a deep breath first, you then pressed down the handle and pushed it open.

You didn’t step in yet and your eyes had been squeezed shut. It was between the cold winter outside and the potential murder scene inside.

You opened your eyes. Instinctively they went to the pool on the floor, but you forced yourself to look away. The door was now locked and you went to the second floor, too uncomfortable to sleep on the first since that’s where the events unfolded. 

Then you waited; tossed and turned while waiting both for your dad and for your body to fall asleep. It was hard. The house was eerily quiet, to the point you could hear every single creak the wood made when the wind grazed the cabin. 

Eventually, the exhaustion won over the paranoia. Your head fell back against the soft mattress and you slept soundly, looking more peaceful than when awake, and you continued to do so until your dad found you.

Just like when you were a kid, you were carried to the car. You woke up due to the sound of the rain pattering against the roof, but quickly fell asleep again with a smile on your face as you thought of how happy it would’ve made Soobin if he knew you finally got some rest.

*******

You woke up the next day feeling restless and antsy. You felt like you had no one to turn to and get support from or conjure up a plan with. Right then it looked like you’d spend the three days becoming more and more mentally tortured as the time was running out.

Then you’d probably show up at the doorstep, no plan or defense; you’d surrender and hope for the best - that they’d let you and most importantly Soobin go, unharmed. 

Slowly you rolled out of bed. Like always when getting dressed, you avoided looking in the mirror and if you did, you never let your eyes drift to the ugly scars. If you did, it was almost like it triggered the pain all over again. Your arms would start to itch terribly, and you could feel the burning spreading like wildfire all throughout your body again.

The door opened and since you had put on your clothes already, you dared to look at the door through the mirror. You saw your dad peeking in, an ingenuine smile on his face. Then you caught a glimpse of yourself too, you looked so tired and like you’d been drained of life and happiness. You supposed it was true, you couldn’t wait for it all to be over, for you to finally get peace again.

‘’ Going to school today? ‘’

You were about to glare at him, but then your frowned forehead softened. You had nothing better to do anyway, so why not go? Would they actually go to school when they were busy holding a hostage at one of their houses? You doubted it. They had never cared much about education anyway.

You grunted at him and when he left you packed your backpack full of the books you had neglected. When you’d get to school, you feared that the teachers would question you about why your grades had been falling and why you didn’t do your homework.

Aware of the fact that exams were coming up soon you had considered studying with Soobin. The circumstances just never seemed right. New things, new burdens always seemed to pop up, leaving little room for ordinary things.

You left, walking past your dad wordlessly, and then ran to the bus, almost missing it by a few seconds. The universe must’ve really wanted you to go to school today. The bus was pretty much empty. You took a seat near the back of it and rested against the window.

The whole ride, you had your eyes closed, in between sleeping and being awake all the way until arriving at school. Pushing past the other students you managed to be one of the first ones out. You hurried to walk to the school, up the stairs, and finally to the classroom. The less people, the less anxiety.

Only when you sat down in your seat could you relax. Soon enough the room filled as more students streamed in and took their own seats. The spot where they sat were empty. You looked out to the corridor and didn’t see them there either, but who you did see however was Jiyun. 

She didn’t return your wave or smile. She just continued walking, her head down so she couldn’t see you.

You grimaced and felt very offended. Sure, you hadn’t expected to make a friend, but you had at least thought she’d be polite. What was even weirder was that as you kept following her with your eyes through the glass facing the hallway, she turned quite abruptly and walked right into your classroom.

You cowered back, cautious of her unpredictable and almost erratic behavior. Walking right up to you, she looked determined. She leaned in and whispered in your ear.

‘’ Come with me to the library. ‘’

Jiyun saw how your eyebrows raised, forehead frowning when you weren’t immediately convinced, ‘’ Why? ‘’

‘’ Just, please. Do me a favor! ‘’

You stood up and followed her reluctantly out of the classroom and into the library that was on the same floor. It was empty because all the students were waiting for the first class to start. Jiyun found your hand at some point and dragged you through the maze of the bookshelves.

Stopping at the corner at the very far end from the entrance, she finally turned to you. Something flashed across her face; guilt, sadness or was it pity?

Your gaze started flickering, ‘’ Jiyun, what are we doing here? ‘’

‘’ I’m sorry. ‘’ 

You watched in confusion as she started unbuttoning the first buttons of her shirt, she threw the fabric off of half of her shoulder with so much force it almost ripped. Then she pulled out her ponytail but not all the way, followed by smearing some of her makeup.

‘’ Jiyun? ‘’ your voice grew more concerned, more exasperated.

No response. She picked up a book and you gasped as she hit it hard against her face. You tried to pull it out of her hands and were instead met with a slap to your face.

‘’ I have to do this. ‘’

‘’ What…’’

You ignored her and tried to reach for the book again that she had managed to hit herself with more times since you were distracted by the stinging feeling on your cheek. Fear could be felt in the pit of your stomach as things were slowly starting to get pieced together.

Red marks had formed on her face now, sure to be big bruises in a day or two. When she noticed you moving towards her in the corner of her eye, she gave you an apologetic look before kicking you hard in your stomach. You fell over and groaned, clutching your stomach and gasping for air. 

‘’ Stand up. ‘’

You managed to get to a standing position with the help of the closest bookshelves that you could claw yourself up with. She looked completely disheveled when you turned to her. You were about to ask again - why are we here, why are you doing this? 

Before you could, she had already turned again, heading right for the hallway. You started to follow her but were left frozen in your spot. A loud shriek ripped from Jiyun’s throat. She fell to her knees in the middle of the hall and sobbed loudly.

People ran out of the classrooms wondering what all the noise was about and quickly the space had been filled to max capacity. One girl crouched down next to her while a teacher cleared a way to get through.

‘’ What happened? ‘’

‘’ She-sh, she hurt me! ‘’

You stared at her in bewilderment, until it turned to despair and you felt a stomach-dropping feeling when with a shaky hand she pointed at you. All heads turned to you, but you only had eyes for Jiyun on the floor.

Betrayal…again? However, can you really betray someone if you never had any loyalty to them?

The panic flared up inside your body. You took a few steps back towards the people, eyes wide and filled to the brim with tears. 

‘’ Y/n? What did she do? ‘’ the teacher said behind your turned back.

‘’ She hit me….she al-always bullies me and sometimes she, ‘’ Jiyun faked a hiccup in the middle of her even faker crying, ‘’ She touches…’’ her voice died out and it had the dramatic effect she must’ve hoped for.

The crowd gasped and next they murmured about how they had noticed how her clothes looked like they’d been roughly handled. You didn’t look at any of them. You knew they had already collectively decided to condemn you and believe Jiyun instead.

‘’ Y/n, is this true? ‘’

Your throat felt dry, too dry to even speak. You tried clearing it, but it almost caused you to feel like you couldn’t breathe and kickstart a panic attack so you shook your head. First gently and then more violently, almost until you got dizzy. 

‘’ Come with me to my office, ‘’ she sternly said.

You felt her hand wrap around your arm in a tough hold. You were dragged past the people whose words hurt you almost physically as well as mentally. After hearing all that they said, you ended up in the chair in front of her desk with an expressionless look on your face.

You felt empty. There was barely any room for anger; it was more of an acceptance that had come after the initial horror. It was them. They were behind this 100%, and it was what Jiyun had warned you of in the bathroom. 

You scoffed sarcastically. You never would’ve done that to another student, even if it meant them going even harder on you, even if it meant more burn marks. She had sold herself easily.

‘’ Is this funny to you, y/n? ‘’

It wasn’t the fact that you had slipped up and forgotten where you were and what situation you were in. It was more that you had hit rock bottom, who gives a fuck attitude? 

‘’ I’m going to have to call your parents. And, ‘’ she slid a pile of papers across the desk. 

‘’ You will be suspended immediately. Leave your badge and all other belongings at the check-in area. ‘’

You threw your head back, ‘’ Of course. ‘’

‘’ Excuse me? ‘’

‘’ You won’t even let me defend myself. It’s just guilty until proven innocent, hm? ‘’

‘’ We have received more reports from other students claiming to have witnessed similar events, ‘’ the teacher irritably shot back.

‘’ And let me guess, their names are Jungwon, Heeseung, Ni-ki, Sunoo, Jake, Sunghoon, and Jay, right? ‘’

Even with your eyes closed, the lack of response was a response in itself. You smiled while looking at the ceiling and crossed your arms nonchalantly. 

‘’ Well fuck you guys then. This has always been a shit and unfair school who have done nothing when it came to defending me. But you’re always so eager to please these kids born with silver spoons in their mouths, fucking hypocrites. ‘’

The teacher gasped and you heard the others in the room stand up to see who the disrespectful student was. You turned and didn’t look back. You meant every word you said and you had waited so long to say it.

They wanted this to crush you and sure, it had made you finally lose it. But for the future, if you won the fight this was a blessing in disguise. 

*******

After coming home, your dad bothered you with a lot of questions which you ignored completely. The door was slammed in his face like usual and he stared at the wood with regret and shame again, wondering why his daughter refused to talk to him even though he was trying so hard.

That night, you slept well. You cried yourself to sleep, letting everything you had been keeping in for who knows how long, just get out. It felt like a huge burden had been taken off your shoulders, you felt lighter and slept like a baby.

The next morning, you had a plan in mind - to see your mom at the hospital and then Yeonjun. You technically had two more days left but since you didn’t have a school to go to anymore and Yeena was unreachable, these were the two things you wanted to do the most.

The staff at the hospital gave you dirty looks when you told them your name and said why you were there. Walking past some while taking the elevator, you caught a few words here and there. They seemed to judge you, calling you a bad daughter for not visiting when your mom had been there for so long.

You didn’t care. It was a private hospital that treated snobby, rude, and probably at some times undeserving rich people. It was no wonder the staff would be similar. With a head held high, you stepped into the elevator and flashed them a smile. They turned away and looked uncomfortable.

‘’ Your mom’s room is on the 16th floor. In the VIP section. ‘’ you saw in the mirrors on the walls how they looked you up and down.

‘’ Did you pay for this? ‘’

‘’ No. ‘’

They didn’t ask any more questions and just led you to the room, leaving afterward to give you some privacy. Your mom looked more vibrant than the last time you had seen her.

Sitting on her bed, she was looking out of the window at the beautiful view. Her cheeks looked less hollow like she had gained some weight and her skin looked less pale.

‘’ Hi, mom. ‘’

Her head whipped around and her face lit up, ‘’ Y/n! I’ve been waiting for you. ‘’

You sat down on her bed and let her pull you into her arms. She kissed the top of your head and rubbed your back as if you were the one who was sick.

‘’ How have you been, honey? ‘’

‘’ It’s okay. Not much has changed since last time. ‘’

She looked concerned and you felt bad for letting a frown form on her warm face so you leaned into her touch and smiled comfortingly.

‘’ It’s fine mom, I’m doing well. ‘’

‘’ And Soobin? ‘’

You hesitated, ‘’ What about him? ‘’

‘’ Is he doing well? Last time I saw you two, you were hiding from someone. ‘’

‘’ He’s…fine too. They weren’t anyone important mom, stop worrying. ‘’ 

She nodded and leaned back. Her eyes were still set on the horizon outside, the big skyscrapers outside accompanying it.

‘’ I like it here, ‘’ your mom sighed contently, ‘’ But I want to go outside with my daughter. ‘’

Your smile turned sorrowful. ‘’ One day. One day soon we will do that. ‘’

Only a half-smile pulled at the corners of her lips.

‘’ Do you really think so, honey? ‘’

‘’ Of course, ‘’ a tear rolled down your cheek.

‘’ I would take you to that park near our old house, the one you used to play so much in. Do you remember it? ‘’

The sheets ruffled as you angled your head to look at her. The light shining through the windows made her look so much like an angel, just like it; she beamed with hope, love, and warmth.

‘’ I do. ‘’

‘’ You didn’t have many friends so mommy always played with you ‘’ she looked at you when the fond memory came to mind, ‘’ But what did I always tell you? ‘’

‘’ There’s nothing wrong with being alone in this world, ‘’ you whispered thickly, holding back more tears from spilling.

Although it was a sweet memory for your mom. You had always suppressed it because it always reminded you of the grim future that followed that moment. Nothing changed. Ever since birth you had, had few by your side. Never did you fit in, never did you have genuine friends. Never understood, never loved.

You buried your face into your mom’s hospital gown. She hummed and put her arm around you to bring you closer. You stayed like that for a while, just relaxing under her wings. 

When it was time to go, you looked back at her one last time and promised to visit soon with Soobin by your side. You hoped that the next time you’d see her would be the day of her discharge.

*******

You knocked on the door before you changed your mind and turned around. The sound almost made the silence after seem even more deafening than before. No movement could be heard on the other side so slowly you turned, ready to leave disappointed.

‘’ Y/n, is that you? ‘’ a weak voice mumbled, stopping you in your tracks.

You stared back at the door in disbelief. It had been so quiet that you were questioning if you’d imagined it or not.

‘’ Yeonjun? ‘’

The lock clicked and the door creaked open. It revealed Yeonjun who looked like he’d been through hell. Not only did he have dark circles under his eyes, disheveled hair and was wearing the same clothes he was when you saw him last; but, you could also see all the trash in the back. It looked like he had purposefully ruined his room.

Papers, books, clothes, all laid crumpled up or torn on the floor, right next to the bags of snacks and cans of drinks.

‘’ How- ‘’ you licked your lips, unsure of what to say. ‘’ How…are you doing? ‘’

He chuckled sarcastically, ‘’ What does it look like? ‘’

You chewed on your lips.

‘’ I’m sorry. About everything, and I should’ve come to check up on you sooner. ‘’

Yeonjun stared at you for some seconds in silence. Then he nodded, a fake smile ghosting over his lips briefly before he went back to looking sullen.

‘’ How’s Soobin? ‘’

He must’ve noticed your hesitance because his eyes suddenly widened, looking a lot more interested and lively than earlier. 

‘’ Has he hurt him? ‘’

‘’ Jungwon? No, I don’t think so, ‘’ you truthfully said.

‘’ Then what? ‘’

‘’ Soobin brought me to your cabin. I- um…came up with the idea to bring Jake there, luring him and making him give us some information. ‘’

He crossed his arms, making you speak faster in nervousness. 

‘’ Well, things went wrong. Jungwon stabbed Jake- ‘’ his mouth opened and his eyebrows twitched. ‘’ Then they took Soobin when they left and told me they’ll give me three days. ‘’

‘’ Before what? ‘’

‘’ Not really sure. I think they were threatening to hurt Soobin. ‘’

His tongue poked the inside of his cheek and you cowered away, ready to get yelled at. Again, he stayed quiet. It was a bit different from the first time you’d met him when he was confident and replied rapidly and sharply. Now he seemed to need some time to think over what to say.

Or calm himself. You finally dared to look at him after he was silent for a few minutes and to your horror, you noticed his hands were shaking. 

‘’ Yeon- ‘’

‘’ None of this would’ve happened if you just listened to me from the beginning. ‘’

You didn’t raise your voice even if you felt like his harsh words were unfair. There was some truth to them. You could’ve still been friends with Soobin without dragging him into the mess. He nagged you about how little you were sleeping, while he himself looked tired all the time. Yet, his face would light up any time he saw you and he was ready to drop everything to help you.

You didn’t deserve him. Hot tears filled your eyes, making Yeonjun turn blurry. You turned your head away in shame, ‘’ I’ll get him back, ‘’ you mumbled before walking away.

He didn’t stop you. It seemed like you were alone in the fight again. It was then and there that you made the rash decision. Your feet moved on their own, bringing you to another doorstep.

You rang the doorbell and waited. It took some time for the door to be answered. A lot of noises came from the other side but around three minutes passed before someone actually opened it.

A familiar face greeted you, ‘’ You’re here already? ‘’

You nodded, not having any energy to smile and certainly no energy to hear any mocking. Thankfully it was Sunoo who opened the door, with a curious Ni-ki standing just a step away.

‘’ Are you…okay? ‘’ the taller male asked. ‘’ You don’t look so good. ‘’

You were swaying from foot to foot, deeply affected by the conversation with Yeonjun. Your eyes barely grazed over the two boys, they kept wandering aimlessly.

‘’ Will you let him go if I come in? ‘’

‘’ Yes, ‘’ Ni-ki hurried to press out before Sunoo answered.

He moved to the side and you walked in, again without looking back. Hands reached for your jacket and you let them take it off without a fight. One, or both of them put their arms around you, you think it was Ni-ki, while Sunoo held your hand instead.

They lead you through the familiar living room and kitchen, finally ending up in the garden. At the end of the garden, Sunghoon stood by some rose bushes. He raised his eyebrow when he spotted the three of you, a smile tugging at his lips.

‘’ It hasn’t even been three days. ‘’

‘’ I know, ‘’ you weakly said, ‘’ When can I see Soobin? ‘’

‘’ I will take you to him now. ‘’

He turned and Ni-ki and Sunoo let go of you. Instead, you followed Sunghoon who seemed to disappear into the bushes when he took a step forward. You blinked in confusion, not sure what to do. A small scream erupted from you when you were tugged forward by the arm.

On the other side of the bush was an entrance to a bunker. You looked at Sunghoon who gladly boasted, ‘’ We all have a bunker in our backyards, in case enemies come. ‘’

You hummed, obediently climbing down first when he opened it for you. Of course the rich would be saved first in case of an emergency. You scoffed scornfully under your breath. 

It was a very big bunker that looked fit for a family like Jungwon’s. The first section was a long hallway and it had different doors which you assumed were bedrooms for every family member and more.

Sunghoon led you through the tight hall into an opening in the middle before the hallways continued. It was a leisure room; beanbags, a pool table, a boxing machine, and even a TV with controllers that Heeseung and Jay were playing with were there.

Jungwon sat a bit away from the other two, on a beanbag in the corner pressed against the wall. He watched them but didn’t engage and because his seat was facing the entrance to the hallway, he was the first to notice you coming.

He looked surprised. His eyebrows raised and his mouth opened when he stood up, ‘’ It hasn’t been three days. ‘’ he echoed what Sunghoon had said.

‘’ I know. I didn’t have anything to do, ‘’ you shrugged casually.

He must’ve thought you were stupid. Heeseung and Jay looked over their shoulders to glance at you briefly and then turned back almost instantly to their game. Jungwon however, crossed his arms and tilted his head, a frown had formed on his face.

‘’ You had nothing to do? That’s it? ‘’

You nodded, determined to pretend like you weren’t about to faint from the fear. It was best to act like you were completely nonchalant and unfazed by what you had witnessed him doing not that long ago.

His frown turned into a joyous smirk, ‘’ Did you go to school? ‘’

‘’ Yes. ‘’

Your head turned when Heeseung chuckled darkly. He didn’t turn around so you all watched his back, waiting for him to say something.

‘’ And? Did you have fun? ‘’ he drawled.

‘’ Yes, ‘’ you said, this time a bit more hesitant.

‘’ Were you expelled? ‘’ Jay chimed in.

You didn’t answer this time, but judging by their shared looks and smiles on their faces, they knew.

‘’ I’ll show you where you will sleep. ‘’

‘’ Sleep? ‘’

You stared after Jungwon who walked down the other hallway. He didn’t stop and say anything, he only turned once he had reached the end and opened a door. You ran there because he looked very impatient.

It was a small room, about the size of a prison cell. It was cozier than one though, with a proper bed and a desk but it didn’t have much else in it. Covers and blankets were on the bed. The walls were blank and empty, void of any personality. 

‘’ Why do I get my own room? ‘’

Jungwon seemed amused, ‘’ I guess it will take some while to release Soobin. In the meantime, you’ll be here, with us. ‘’

‘’ No! That was not part of the plan at all, ‘’ your voice got louder.

‘’ Maybe not yours. ‘’

He started stalking towards you, making the only space that was furthest away from him the bed. You crawled back on it, all the way until your back hit the wall. Your hands tried to push him away and even claw at his exposed forearms.

He was still indifferent, only looking down at you after having crawled on top with a dissatisfied look on his face. That same look - like you were just a disobedient child.

He groaned when your foot temporarily had some room to move and you pulled your leg up to knee him in between his legs. It didn’t really have the effect you wanted it to. Instead of pulling away, he knew what you were trying to do and fell forward, putting all of his weight on you instead.

You huffed as you tried to lift him off of you to get away but it was impossible, he didn’t move an inch. Into the crook of your neck, you felt his hot breath on your skin as he laughed. It was followed by a clicking sound and something cold and tight around your wrists.

You moved them but they weren’t able to move very far, something clinked when you pulled them too far away. When Jungwon finally drew away from you and laid on the bed, you realized he had handcuffed you to the bed. 

‘’ Jungwon! Uncuff me now you- bitch! ‘’ you growled at him.

He gave you one final look of cockiness and amusement before turning his back on you and ignoring your screams and insults. You kicked against the blankets like a little child and screamed your throat hoarse. 

‘’ No, no! Don’t you dare leave me here! ‘’

The only response you got was the sound of the door closing and the key turning in the lock. It stilled you completely. You stopped fighting and relaxed, knowing that energy should be saved for later.

Staring at the ceiling now you began to regret your decision. It was too impulsive and not at all thought through. You hadn’t even considered that they might stop you from leaving. You sighed and closed your eyes, which made your thoughts redirect to Soobin. Why wouldn’t they just let him go? When you imagined him confined to a small room like this somewhere down there, you almost started to cry out of guilt. Whatever they’d ask of you to let Soobin go, you’d do it, without a doubt.

*******

Sometime after laying there and just daydreaming about past memories and the future again, you fell asleep. When you woke up you had no idea what time it was since the room had no windows. 

You could hear noises coming from the wall next to your bed so you shuffled closer to it and put your ear against it. The sounds became clearer. Was that someone crying? 

‘’ Hello? ‘’

It became quiet. Then, you heard something moving on the other side. A voice made you jump in surprise, ‘’ Is that you? ‘’

‘’ Jake? ‘’ you breathed, ‘’ You-you’re alive? ‘’

He giggled, maybe detecting the small concern in your voice, ‘’ Yes, thanks to you. ‘’

You opened and closed your mouth a few times, not sure what to say. Jake continued talking to take the burden from you.

‘’ I got here yesterday after getting treated at the hospital. They said it wasn’t too bad. ‘’

‘’ Why would you come here after they stabbed you? ‘’

‘’ Well…I thought they had taken you. I wanted to help you, return the favor and stuff. ‘’

‘’ But it didn’t go well I’m guessing? ‘’

‘’ No. Clearly not, ‘’ he said jokingly, ‘’ They didn’t accept me back but thankfully they didn’t kill me either. ‘’

You weren’t sure why you asked the next question or why you even cared, but it was like he made you feel pity for him. Like this wasn’t the same guy that had bullied you.

‘’ Have they been giving you food? ‘’

Jake didn’t see it as you being kind and thoughtful, he thought you were concerned for your own health, ‘’ Yeah. They give us food if you’re worried about that. Water too. ‘’

You hummed, chewing on your lip. 

‘’ How will we get out? ‘’

‘’ I’m not sure we will, y/n. ‘’

Neither of you said anything after that. The words felt heavy; enough so that it sent both of you into deep thought. You stared at the ceiling again, there wasn’t much to do in there anyway.

Just then, someone knocked on your door. They didn’t listen for a response and you waited anxiously as it unlocked and was pushed open. Heeseung stepped in with a tray of food and a bottle of water.

Jay peeked in for a moment and then disappeared again, shortly being replaced by the face of Sunoo. You rolled over on your side, feeling horrendously like a zoo animal. 

‘’ Hey, princess. ‘’ 

Heeseung sat crosslegged by the bed and opened the water. Despite your body language protesting, he helped you sit upright and poured water into your mouth. Your eyes drifted from your bully to the tray of food he had placed on the bed.

He snickered when he noticed it and brought it forward. Taking some chopsticks he loaded food into your mouth which you gladly took even though you were dying on the inside from humiliation.

And that was it. Once the food was eaten and the water drunken, he left and locked the room again. You stared wide-eyed at the door after. Were they doing it on purpose? Limiting social interactions to use it as a tool? You would’ve thought they’d be eager to talk to you now that they had you all for themselves, out of sight of everyone else.

Like on the bus, you remained between sleeping and being conscious again; occasionally turning your head towards the wall where Jake was on the other side and then staring at the door.

The next time the door opened, you assumed it was nighttime. Jay had been the one tasked with giving you food and water instead of Heeseung, but you still saw Sunoo in the background. He came in fully and sat on the foot of the bed. His eyes carried compassion and guilt in them, which were trained on you the whole time you let Jay feed you.

‘’ What time is it? How long have I been here? ‘’

You tried initiating a conversation to test your theory of them purposefully avoiding talking to you for too long. Jay stopped his movements. He looked annoyed and almost glared at you.

‘’ Hours. ‘’

‘’ How many? ‘’

You were ignored. Not even begging silently to Sunoo helped you. He stood up which caught the attention of Heeseung and Sunghoon who had now also joined your room, although only in the doorway. 

At the sound of shuffling footsteps behind him, Jay’s head snapped around. Sunoo stared back, a fearful expression on his face as he met the slight glare his friend directed toward him.

Their temper had always been short when it came to Sunoo. No one got scolded or watched as closely as he did. He never contributed anything to plans, he was more dragged along and forced to submit.

‘’ Where are you going? ‘’ Heeseung’s low voice warned.

He felt uncomfortable under the spotlight. All of you had your eyes on him, watching him closely; inspecting him, maybe even judging him. A grimace took over his fear, he instead felt rather pathetic.

But at the same time, Sunoo had more reason to be afraid of them now. They had killed Jake for stepping out of line, and he was terrified they’d do the same to him.

‘’ I-I was just- ‘’

‘’ Just leave, ‘’ Sunghoon waved him off, and the almost disgusted scowl on his face was hard to miss.

You released the breath you didn’t know you’d been holding in when he turned back again. What did they want? And what were they going to do? Not knowing was somehow worse than if you knew they would hurt you next, at least then you could prepare. It reminded you of the gym, that first time they had pressed the hot iron against your skin.

You had no clue what would happen when you walked into that room, similar to how you’d felt when you walked into Jungwon’s house, and every single time they stepped into your room so far.

Do they want to talk this time, taunt you, just see you, make a deal, kiss you or is this the time they take it one step further? Those were anxious thoughts that always filled your head when almost all of them had gathered now. At this point, it almost immediately kicked your fight or flight in when you heard the lock turn; just like Pavlov’s dog, you had been trained to recognize the sound and your body reacted autonomously. 

‘’ Hey. ‘’

You raised your hung head and looked at Jay. The two of you seemed to try and read what was on the other’s mind, but you had no luck.

‘’ Do you not want to see Soobin? ‘’

A humorless scoff left your dry lips, ‘’ He’s not dead yet? ‘’

His eyebrow raised, your reaction was quite unexpected. You sounded exhausted, almost like you had given up already. It was a shame, they hadn’t even toyed that much with you yet.

‘’ Do you wish he were? ‘’

‘’ No, ‘’ you firmly pressed out through clenched teeth.

‘’ Then you better be on your best behavior, ‘’ he smirked before standing up.

You watched through the corner of your eye how he walked away with the others and relaxed when the sound of the door closing echoed. 

You began to think less and less that they would let either of you go. Despite their fathers being close, Soobin’s dad wouldn’t have anything to say if his son came in between his boss and the company’s future. 

Time was running out in all ways. The election was fast approaching, on top of all the other things that were burdens for you. 

*******

A lot of time had passed until you opened your eyes again. You assumed you had been sleeping because you couldn’t remember what you had daydreamed about. What had woken you up was a lot of noise on the outside.

The more you were waking up and shaking the grogginess off, the louder and clearer the sounds became. They were shouting and you could hear thuds, sounds of furniture moving and banging.

You sat up straight. Footsteps approached your door. With your heart in your throat, you stared and waited. It went quiet, then the lock slowly clicked; with a creak, it was pushed open. You almost pressed your eyes shut out of fear but didn’t have time.

‘’ Yeonjun? ‘’

‘’ Hey. Sorry I was late, ‘’ he casually said, ‘’ Sunoo told me where you were. ‘’

You were about to say something else when a stranger pushed past him. More people poured in, shining their bright lights at you so it took some time to adjust to it. You heard what sounded like a radio, and your head snapped up.

‘’ You’re here to help me? ‘’ you choked out.

They looked down at you with polite smiles. One of them helped uncuff you and get you on your feet. You followed them wordlessly out of the room. When they led you past Jake’s room you couldn’t help but glance in.

He was sitting up on his bed and people were helping him too. He saw you and grinned widely, looking like a little puppy.

‘’ Soobin? ‘’ you looked back at Yeonjun who was following you.

‘’ He’s safe. He was in one of the rooms near the entrance, ‘’ he assured you.

The area you had been in just a few hours ago was completely destroyed. The TV had fallen and the chairs and tables on the other side had been knocked over. 

‘’ Where are they? ‘’

Yeonjun couldn’t hold back the smirk that spread on his face, ‘’ You’ll see. ‘’

You frowned and climbed up the ladder, wondering what he was talking about. As soon as you were out, you had your answer. All six of them were being led away in handcuffs by police officers in the same uniform as the ones escorting you out.

Your group waited for your bullies to leave so you let your eyes wander while standing there. It didn’t seem like there had been an altercation above the bunker so they must have all been below ground. 

Next, you turned and your heart almost stopped. Two people stared back at you, both equally as taken back and so moved by seeing you that they had tears in their eyes. You ran over there, straight into his arms.

‘’ Are you okay? ‘’ you mumbled into his chest.

He sniffled and laughed. You only cried harder, knowing how much you had missed hearing that laugh.

‘’ Yes, I’m okay. Are you? ‘’ he pulled away to look at you, and seemingly satisfied he pulled you in to hug you even tighter.

‘’ Hey, asshole. When is it my turn? ‘’

Soobin rubbed the back of his neck and you saw his cheeks turn red before he released you. Yena had never looked that animated before. She was beaming and had even let the tears drop shamelessly. 

You returned her smile and hugged her carefully. Her hold around you tightened and you felt her chest heave. You rubbed her back soothingly and cried too, mostly because you felt sorry that hadn’t believed her.

You both pulled back after some time and wiped your tears. She genuinely looked like she loved you. You felt like you had to say it, ‘’ I’m so sorry, Yena. ‘’

Her eyes narrowed, ‘’ No! Do not apologize. ‘’

You laughed and accepted defeat because she genuinely looked really angry like she wanted to punch you for even uttering those words or thinking them. 

A hand touched your arm. You turned around, knowing who it was already. A shy Jake greeted you, his anxious eyes darting to Yena and Soobin several times.

‘’ Hi, ‘’ he sheepishly said.

‘’ Hi. ‘’

‘’ I just, um- ‘’ he looked really uncomfortable so you gave him a reassuring smile which seemed to relax him a little bit. 

‘’ I want to apologize for everything. ‘’

You blinked at him.

‘’ What? ‘’ you all three said in unison. 

‘’ Well…I don’t want to blame the others. But I think being in that environment with really bad people influenced me. I’m not perfect, which is why I want to apologize so hopefully I can change, and become better.’’

‘’ I- oh, that’s nice. Thank you. ‘’

He nodded and laughed a bit awkwardly. Trying to move past you he was stopped as you pulled on his sleeve. You weren’t sure if you were making a mistake you’d come to regret. However, you said it anyway,

‘’ We can keep in touch if you want. ‘’

Now it was his time to blink at you in bewilderment, ‘’ What? Are you sure? ‘’

‘’ Yeah. I might move away from the city anyway. ‘’

You handed him your phone which he stared at for a few seconds before he seemed to snap out of it. He gave it back and this time he had a genuine smile on his face as he left. Yena and Soobin immediately ran up to you.

‘’ Are you crazy? Why would you do that? ‘’

‘’ I don’t know, ‘’ you groaned, ‘’ Trying to give people a second chance? ‘’

Soobin shook his head, ‘’ What would you do without me? ‘’

You laughed loudly and hugged him again. Pressed against his chest, you soon pulled away slightly to look up at him.

‘’ Soobin? ‘’

‘’ Yeah- ‘’

His words were knocked right out of his mouth as you stood on tiptoe to press your lips against his. Yena squealed with joy and gasped when she noticed. There was so much love, so much desperation and yearning in that kiss you had waited so long for. When you both looked at each other, he was glowing with happiness, he could feel what you were trying to tell him.

*******

Yeonjun had explained it about a thousand times since you left Jungwon’s house that night. However many times he kept doing it, it was still surreal to you and Soobin. What he had done once you left was quite simple, but not something any of you had thought about before.

He went to social media and the press. Turned out your bullies thought you’d never go online with it all because it was too big of a thing, they probably only thought that if you did that you would write some letter exposing the bullying. Those that released letters like that never gained much attention, they were always buried under the other hundreds of letters.

And if they thought you’d attempt to go on social media with the scandals of the company abusing their staff and being corrupt; they assumed you would post it, and they’d track you down before it gained traction.

Yeonjun was smarter than that. He went anonymous and made sure he couldn’t be traced at all. With his hacking, he released the most important files - the photos, texts, and evidence that were the most important. He had organized them when you all thought he was locked up in his room because he was distressed. No, that had only motivated him further, pushing him to his limits to get revenge for his friend.

It took a lot of time for it to get attention on social media, so he copied and sent it to every news outlet he had done research on that wasn’t connected to the company. Naturally, they freaked out. They tried looking everywhere for Yeonjun, but he wasn’t at home.

It was crazy, something out of a movie almost. You felt so lucky that it took off online the way that it did because it was a bit of a luck game. Some must’ve tried the same things you did, but it never got highlighted.

You suppose this was the universe’s way of giving back to you after so much pain and misery. All the fighting, tears, and work for the revenge you so badly wanted to get; had not been in vain.

You leaned your head back against the seat in the car after Yeonjun had retold his story again. He said that the evidence led to a warrant for their arrest and that they were being detained while they investigated.

*******

The sounds of heels clacking against the marble floor echoed down the hallway. You already knew who they might be, the mothers of your bullies. So you made a run for it, scared that they would confront you.

Escaping into one of the corridors to the side that led to smaller courtrooms, you pressed yourself against the wall while holding your breath. The heels went past you and then disappeared completely. 

Soon, you started to hear two voices. It sounded like an older male and…You leaned closer, the voice became clearer. It was your lawyer that you had recently hired in case your bullies or the company tried to get back at you. In hushed voices, they angrily conversed.

‘’ You said you could wrap this up. ‘’

Your lawyer released a short, tired sigh and you could almost picture him rubbing his nose out of frustration.

‘’ I would’ve been able to if they didn’t take it to the media. With everyone’s eyes on us, I can’t do much, people have protested! You’ll have to accept the punishment. ‘’

Silence filled the area for a short period. Then a low hum sounded from the older male. You suspected he was from Jay’s dad’s company from what they were saying. It meant that your lawyer was affiliated with them. You rolled your eyes - of course, your luck would have it that way. 

But at the same time, it didn’t seem to matter. The lawyer couldn’t soften the blow of the angry citizens and keyboard warriors at home, nor could they dodge the bullets of the workers’ unions that demanded a punishment. Jungwon wouldn’t get quite the same punishment the company would, so maybe they were talking about that and not why you were there today.

‘’ And the girls? ‘’

You straightened up and swallowed thickly, almost choking on air when you were mentioned. 

‘’ I’m not sure what will happen to her. She hasn’t asked for the case to be reopened. ‘’

Your eyebrows knit together. Reopened? They weren’t talking about you. Who were they talking about? Shuffling closer to the voices as they became even more cautiously hushed, you hoped that they would explain it further or at least say enough for you to decipher it yourself.

‘’ I probably won’t have to worry about that then. We paid them a great deal. ‘’

‘’ And even if she went through with it, she wouldn’t have gotten much justice, ‘’ your lawyer filled in.

You waited with bated breath for them to continue, but a long time passed with neither of them saying anything. Then you heard the sound of shoes moving and you hurried to turn the corner, your heart beating loudly in your chest.

‘’ Miss? ‘’

You froze. Turning around, you could only assume you looked like a deer caught in headlights. It was evident that you had heard something you weren’t supposed to. Your lawyer stepped away from the older male and put a hand hovering against the small of your back to make you move.

The two of you walked back to the courtroom, and immediately after retaking your seats outside it, he questioned you.

‘’ What were you doing? ‘’

You bit your tongue, ‘’ I was just resting and I…accidentally heard you. ‘’

He hummed and put his arm to rest behind you on the bench. It served its purpose. Intimidated, words slipped out of your mouth without him having said much.

‘’ I-I didn’t hear much. I swear! ‘’

He looked disappointed, but also amused; a small smile played on his lips. He leaned in and this time it felt much more intimate. 

‘’ Are you going to tell anyone? ‘’

‘’ No, ‘’ you shook your head vehemently, ‘’ But…who were you talking about? ‘’

‘’ Sunghoon and Jay. ‘’

Your eyes widened and he looked equally surprised when studying your face and seeing that you had no idea what he was talking about.

‘’ Didn’t you get the files? ‘’

‘’ Yes? ‘’ you said in a small voice.

Maybe Yeonjun had left that detail out.

‘’ The reason they were at the police station was to pick up a report that was filed against them by their former girlfriends. ‘’

‘’ Why? ‘’ 

You had a bad feeling in your stomach, and you could’ve probably guessed right then and there what it was about. It was just hard to imagine those two in particular doing something so heinous, so evil.

Then again - they were friends with Jungwon, the devil himself and evil reincarnated. You supposed it takes one to know one and they were all bad in one way or another.

Your lawyer licked his lips, glanced back to see if anyone else was around, and then casually whispered, ‘’ Domestic violence. ‘’

‘’ Wha- ‘’ you felt at loss for words.

‘’ It was dismissed, naturally because of their connections. They had photos and texts but it was all swept under the rug. ‘’

‘’ How is that even possible? ‘’

‘’ Money is power, miss. ‘’ he looked away, but his smirk was still visible, ‘’ It can do anything you want it to. ‘’

‘’ That’s immoral. ‘’ you angrily burst out, quite loudly.

Immediately a hand found its way to your thigh, warning you to keep your voice down. 

‘’ That’s life, ‘’ he bit back.

His attention was turned to the front again, firmly letting you know he was done talking. You almost felt like a kid around him, despite your ages not being that far apart. You obeyed him, but with a sour taste in your mouth, he reminded you of someone.

‘’ The break is over. Court is in session again. ‘’

People moved into the courtroom. You kept your head down, but could almost predict that Jungwon and his lawyer brushed past you in that moment. When the last few people went in, the guards closed the doors and the sound of it echoed in the silence.

‘’ What do you think the ruling will be? ‘’

He ticked his tongue. You were sure he already had an answer despite not giving it right away. Maybe he was sparing you the pain for a bit longer.

‘’ I think it won’t be a harsh punishment. ‘’

‘’ But, he will go to prison, right? ‘’ he didn’t answer, ‘’ Right? ‘’

‘’ There’s nothing I can do to change it, miss, ‘’ he explained calmly, ‘’ The others were already just put on probation for the kidnapping charges. This is how it works with Chaebol families. ‘’

‘’ He killed someone! ‘’

He glared at you, and your voice quietened down a bit. However, It didn’t do much to quieten the anger you felt inside.

‘’ They will claim it’s involuntary manslaughter, maybe even spin it into negligent homicide. ‘’

‘’ Manslaughter? That must be prison time. ‘’

‘’ Most of the time, you can pay a fine, especially when you’re a first-time offender and a rich, well-known person like Mr. Yang. ‘’

You sighed and your whole body slumped down in the seat. Doubling over you buried your face in your hands and almost tore out pieces of your hair.

‘’ I don’t understand… ‘’ you mumbled to yourself, over and over.

Your lawyer looked at you with pity. But he was quiet. From time to time he went from looking at you with concern, to checking his watch curiously. 

You weren’t sure how much time had passed before the door finally opened again. The people were unusually quiet, so you almost missed them passing by. You only noticed when heaps of shoes passed by right in front of your field of view.

‘’ Y/n, the trial is over. ‘’

Slowly you raised your head, ‘’ What was the verdict? ‘’

‘’ I’ll go check. Stay here. ‘’

He stood up and pushed past the stream of people. Close to the entrance, he stopped by what looked like Jungwon’s lawyer from where you were sitting. A visible grin spread on the man’s face, and when your lawyer turned to you, you already knew you wouldn’t be happy with the news.

‘’ No jail? ‘’ you said defeatedly.

He sighed, ‘’ No jail. He just has to pay millions in fines. ‘’

‘’ That’s nothing to a guy like him. ‘’

‘’ At least he and the other guys have been suspended. Are you still going to go to that school? ‘’

You hadn’t thought about that since you yourself got suspended. What you wanted most maybe seemed like something out of a fantasy - to run away to the countryside and finish school there with Soobin, away from the city and the places that only brought forth bad memories.

Your dad would most likely never accept that. But you had considered cutting all ties with him anyway, so it didn’t really matter. If you didn’t live too far out, you could still go and visit your mom every weekend and walk around at the places you actually liked.

‘’ I would suggest you move, miss. ‘’

‘’ Why? ‘’

‘’ Although they have been disciplined and they no longer have the same power they used to because of the company having fallen apart, it doesn’t mean they won’t give up on you. ‘’

‘’ I think they will now. They have lost a lot. ‘’

‘’ Take my advice. I’ll stay in touch, ‘’ he said and then stood up.

You gave him a rather sad smile, but it still carried a lot of gratitude and had more lightness to it than the previous fake ones you had given him in the beginning. You supposed this was as much justice as you and the other victims would get. It wasn’t much, but it was something.

More and more people passed by, unnoticed by you. Remaining glued to the bench you kept thinking over your future. 

*******

6 months later

You shared your thoughts with Soobin about what you wished life after the storm would look like. As always he fought hard to make your wishes come true. He brought you out to his aunt’s house in the countryside and promised you shelter there for as long as you needed.

Going back to the city hadn’t happened many times. Mostly because after you had moved out there, tragedy had struck the peace, disrupting it once again. You almost burst into tears any time you thought of your mom. They had called, telling you that she had passed away. The timing was suspicious, to say the least. Soobin had been there to comfort you after everything; after the confirmation, the funeral, and whenever you felt like your heart was breaking.

But, you knew your mom was at peace now. The crying had become less frequent when you realized this. Free from feeling like a burden on her family, and free from the hold your bullies had over her.

Maybe you could’ve seen it coming. That if you fought back, they’d remove your mom like a piece from a chessboard. 

All in all, you had started to feel happy. You took everything day by day, and gradually it got easier. The stress you had felt from living in the city, constantly harassed and bullied by them, and also under surveillance had disappeared. You felt lighter, looked more radiant. Looking back at it you’d been living in constant survival mode. Therefore it felt a bit weird that you were free now.

You and Soobin were sitting on the train for your first trip into the city in a long time. Summer was fast approaching. As you stopped seeing your bullies, the scars gradually stopped itching. You didn’t care about the stares you’d get when out in public, you freely wore short-sleeved shirts. Soobin was always there to hold your hand or distract you by saying stupid stuff whispered into your ear when he saw them.

And when you turned to him, everyone else disappeared.

*******

*******

taglist; @peaceout97blog-blog, @ayadikreino, @beoms-sugar, @keikeu, @sunghoonnsupremacy, @lilyalone, @sweet-kisses-and-bloody-screams, @eunchaesmileyface, @nunugget, @seunns, @nshmrarki, @huening-ly, @espyluvsyou, @yncel, @loserwithnofriends, @enha-stan, @binchanluvrr, @ariek-divad, @obsessed1with1straykids, @yizhoutv, @taeyongzodiactwinkiri, @w3bqrl, @elleashn, @nuriicata, @yevene, @manasasugarbaby09, @jend3uki

*******

Hey my loves, if you made it this far woww ur crazy bc this is really my longest chapter and written thing on this blog I think I’ve ever done??!! 

Now, this chapter might be confusing or disappointing which is why I’m here to explain it to ease at least some of y’all’s minds (I hope)

First Jake - yes, I did ‘’ revive ‘’ him lol, or decide to not kill him even tho I had planned otherwise, after everyone’s opinions changed. It’s honestly super interesting to see how people’s opinions can change just like that, because of one chapter, one scene and & perspective change, super cool!! Some of you will probably believe he’ll have a full character redemption arc and some still hate him and alwaysa will, never believing a guy like him will change.

Yena, now Yena’s interesting. I always struggled with her character. Do I make her actually betray y/n or not? Do I make her die (bc yes I was very adamant on one of them dying, even Yeonjun was considered, after heroically saving his brother and the girl he liked, he’d die thinking of his friend LMAOO). In the end I settled on her warming up to y/n which I personally found was pretty sweet since before meeting her she was literally a copy of her brother - cold, dark and mean.

Also, at the end I did reveal a pretty big thing abt Sunghoon & Jay. I know the placement is weird and so is the random scene where I bring Jiyun in (maybe?) in all honesty I had forgotten abt her lol and I had also forgotten abt the dirty secrets those two were hiding. That’s why it got crammed in at the end bc I already had my set scenes I wanted to write.

The conclusion might frustrate some, I get that. My simplest explanation is that they were in reality just a bunch of high schoolers. They weren’t some evil masterminds and I think that makes it more realistic. They were spoiled kids who expected their parents to clean up after them every time and thought they were untouchable that’s why the taunted y/n and Soobin by handing them the evidence right in their hands. DUMB !!! In the end though, the punishments they got didn’t make it as ‘’ easy ‘’ as them finding her and the whole thing going down at the end did.

I do believe she got a happy ending even tho it definitely didn’t seem like it with her mom dying and her barely getting any justice lol. But I guess again, it’s a matter of perspective. What she wanted most maybe wasn’t revenge, but freedom that she had always craved. Plus, their jealous assess probably see it as revenge bc she got swept off her feet by Choi Soobin himself.

I love open endings, although this was only a ‘’ semi-open ‘’ ending. Maybe some of you think, like I pitched at the end that they will try to follow her and not give up. Others, would think they’d let her go no matter how painful it’d be - could they perhaps find a new obsession in the city instead?

And also I would say that although my masterlist says ‘’ heavily inspired by ‘’ I only think it ended up being a little inspired by but yeah can’t change it now lol so sorry if u were expecting my girl to pull off such moves like the mc did in the glory.

If you read this far (again) I love you, & even if you didn’t read this whole chapter bc it’s a LOT or you still felt the ending was poopie bc I’m a student who rushes things - thank you, from the bottom of my heart ! I’m excited to see what new projects I will want to do <333

[astermath]

nemesis; part two.

pairing: carmen berzatto x fem!reader

summary: with carmen reworking the restaurant, you’d think his mind would be far too occupied to even think about anything else. yet he can’t shake the guilt from what he’d put you through a month prior. after some talks in therapy, he decides to take a leap of faith and see if he can talk it out with you. he not only wants to convince you that he can be better, but he's got an offer for you too. one you truly can't refuse.

♡ landing page ♡

word count: 4.9K

tags: carmen being unsure about his feelings but trying to be better episode 3265742, letting reader in a little more, APOLOGIES!!!, cursing ig, carm goes to therapy yippee, syd being the absolute realest, regular font below!

notes: sorry this took literally forever omg, I lost my carmen muse for a bit but we are SO back baby. I missed him so much and so sorry if some things don't follow the canon completely (I've been watching season 2 on and off bc I've been so busy lol BUT my fics never follow the canon completely anyways),, hope u guys enjoy and let me know if you'd like a part three ;))

lmk if you'd like to be added to the tag list for further carmen berzatto related content! comments and reblogs are highly appreciated!

Carmen’s life hadn’t known a moment of mental rest in ages. If you asked him when he last sat down with his thoughts or acknowledged his mental anguish, he probably would have said he couldn’t remember the last time. If ever.

With plans to completely revamp The Beef and everything that came with it, now his feelings should be the last thing on his mind. Renovation plans, unforeseen costs and a completely new menu, sure, he could worry his ass off about those, but feelings? Absolutely not. Good thing he was usually so good at suppressing those anyways.

So why was it that he couldn’t shake the thought of what he did to you?

Why, every time he had a moment to himself, would he be overtaken by this intense feeling of guilt? He didn’t even have to be alone, just a second of quiet and the image of you crying in distress would intrude on his thoughts.

It was getting to a point where he’d told his sister, Natalie, about it. Well, not all of it, he wasn’t even sure if he knew all of it. Just that he knows he hurt you, and that coming to terms with what he projected onto you might be a good first step in understanding himself better.

Or maybe it was something more along the lines of “I gotta talk my shit to some people”. Probably that.

To his surprise, it was actually helping. Besides the group therapy sessions where he’d talk about Mikey, the business and his future, he was talking to other people in his life too. Even told Sydney about you, kind of on accident. The words just seemed to… Flow out. It was probably the exhaustion doing its thing.

“I guess I just felt like,” he kept his eyes on the floor he was sweeping, “she was doing it all to fuck with me. I don’t even know where I got the sick idea that she had some obsession over me, but it— it drove me at the same time. It’s like her being on my heels at every aspect of culinary school just made me want to try even harder.”

“Maybe you painted her in that light because you knew it was a good way to keep pushing yourself.” Sydney spoke almost absentmindedly, sweeping the other side of the room. She listened to everything he said in the meantime, and though what he was telling her was a bit worrying, she was glad they got to have talks like this. Carmen often doesn’t like to bring up his past like that.

“Huh,” he paused sweeping for a moment, “yeah… yeah, maybe. Or maybe it was something else.”

Sydney wasn’t even sure he knew what he was referring to. It sounded like something entirely different, like a crush, but what kind of person treats their crushes like that?

Probably an overworked, pressured, overachieving culinary student with a dangerous need for validation. But she wasn’t about to tell him that.

“So yeah, I visited her restaurant, and… It just felt the exact same as back in New York, you know? Like she was rubbing it in my face again, and— and I know that sounds insane, or conceited, but I just can’t let it go. It’s like the thought of her is stuck to my brain like a stubborn piece of gum.” He wanted to smack himself for that stupid analogy, but what was said was said.

“So how’d you handle it?” Sydney’s head perked up, some of her braids now draping over her shoulders.

“Handle what?” Carmen became more and more uneasy the more he talked about you. Like his chest was tight, it was uncomfortable, but not in the way he was when the health inspection came by, it was different. Weirder. Unfamiliar. He didn’t like it, because he didn’t understand it.

“The talk with her.” She emptied the last bit of dust into the trash bag.

“Oh,” his mind took him back to the parking lot a month ago. The way he could almost taste the tears of your skin from how close he stood, he could hear the shakiness of your breath and the profound desperation in your voice when you apologized to him, when you really had no reason to.

If it was still so clear in his mind, then what must it be like for you?

“Carmen?” Sydney snapped him out of his oncoming train of thought.

“Yeah? Sorry, I— Uh, I don’t know it was…” He runs a hand through his hair, suddenly finding it in his best interest to look anywhere else but her face. “Bad. It was— It was bad.” He looks a bit shameful when he meets her eyes. “I fucked up. I like, went all New York boss on her. And then I just… Left.”

His colleague just stares at him for a moment. She knew what he was like when he snapped like that, but that was with his staff, people he liked. So how badly did he snap on you, a person he’d been resenting for years?

“I’m gonna go take out this trash, and uh… Head home.” She lifts the grey plastic bag she was holding. “But uh, Carm?”

“Yeah?”

“You got issues, man.” She has a bit of an awkward smile on her face, but he knows she means it. He knows she’s right. She usually is.

He nods, silently, letting her words sink in. He did have issues, everyone knew that, but most people didn’t just say it. That’s why he liked Sydney, she was so real, so honest. She was so good for the business, for the kitchen. And maybe her saying that to him was all part of grounding him in the reality of it all. Of his issues, just that they existed.

“Heard.” he says. His voice comes out raspier than he expected, like he’s struggling to say it.

“Goodnight, chef.”

“Night.”

He’d thought about what Sydney said the entire night. He does have issues, he knows that, he’s just mad at himself for letting everything get this far before seeking help. It scares him. Because it reminds him too much of Mikey. Or what he heard about him when things got bad.

He doesn’t want to make the same mistakes his brother did. Lock people out of his life just because it seems easier, because it’s better to minimize the damage than to figure out why you’re doing damage at all. And yes it’s uncomfortable, yes it’s scary, terrifying even. But he keeps being reminded of how it must feel for you.

It’s something he’d never considered before. He always thought he had you all figured out, all fake smiles and backhanded compliments to distract him. It never occurred to him to just… Ask. It was always just easier to assume. It fit his view of you and it kept him going, even if it was at the expense of ever getting to know you at all.

He’s hoping he can change that with a few text messages and a long, probably uncomfortable, talk over coffee. Just hoping, trying, that’s really all he can do. He’s well aware of how bad he is at communicating, but he has to give it a shot. For you, at least.

He stares at his phone screen for far longer than is necessary, continuously rereading the messages he’d typed. His eyes keep flicking to your contact, making sure he sent it to the right person. The only thing you two had texted about before was a time and place for him to try your new restaurant. His heart aches at the exclamation points and emojis you’d sent; you were so excited, and he drove all that excitement straight into the ground.

He closes his eyes and shuts off the phone. His chest hurts, like he’s been holding his breath the entire time. Maybe he has. You could have that effect on him, making it harder to breathe. He always wondered why he had such nervous reactions around you specifically. He always figured it had to do with your one sided rivalry, but it feels… Different. More complex.

Your eyes are finally peeled off your computer screen when numerous phone notifications alarm you. Truth be told, you’ve been trying your best to keep yourself occupied as much as possible. That usually helps when you get waves of emotions like this, keeping busy, distracting your mind from overthinking.

Ever since your last encounter with Carmen, you’ve been so on edge. Always trying to do something, anything, so you wouldn’t have to think about what happened, why he acted like that to you. Because you know if you did, you’d just start blaming yourself again, and you’d be back to square one.

Your eyebrows raise at the name of the contact. You were sure he’d blocked you, or at least deleted your number after last time. He was avoidant like that, and frankly, you weren’t sure if you wanted him to talk to you again after that anyways. Maybe it was just to drive the point home, make you feel even more worthless.

Still, you were curious. Even if it was just to cuss you out even more, at least you knew what to expect, right?

[carmen]: hey, I really want to talk to you about what happened last time.

[carmen]: well

[carmen]: I want to apologise

[carmen]: but I can’t do that like this

[carmen]: I’d much rather do it in person

[carmen]: if you’d let me

[carmen]: meet me at odette’s tomorrow around 10? coffee’s on me, I just want to talk

[carmen]: please

The last message was sent minutes later than the rest, while you were reading them. He was desperate for an answer, and though you wanted to hear him out, to talk to him, something in you felt off about the whole thing. Like he was just doing this to clear off his own guilt, only to then ditch you just like he ditched you after culinary school. Because you’re rivals, apparently. That’s what you do.

But then there’s something else in you too. The part that’s still nostalgic about New York with him. About the glances back and forth when you were timed on preparing certain things, about the way he’d stare at you when you got feedback, the ignorant bliss you lived in. When you still believed he might have liked you just a little.

That part of you takes the upper hand when you reply and take his offer. Your heart is in your throat, nerves overtaking you already and you weren’t even with him yet. He had that effect on you sometimes, making it harder to breathe.

You wondered what that meant.

Carmen sits alone at a booth, all the way at the back of the café he’d chosen. It’s rather quiet, as most Mondays are, yet at the same time, it’s so loud. Loud in the way he hears the clinking of every spoon against porcelain cups, the crinkling of a napkin and the not so subtle ticking of the clock above the entrance. 10:06. You were late.

Suddenly he's filled with more regret than he's ever felt before. He's not ready to see you again, only to be reminded of how he made you cry, and of his own tumultuous emotions and shortcomings that lead to this moment. It's surprising how fast the emotions he associates with you changed; he's not angry anymore, he's scared, guilty, nervous. He wants to see you so bad and yet he feels like you'd be better off never talking to him again.

It's too late to make a run for it when you finally walk through the door. Hair a little damp from the rain, just a bit disheveled from what he could only assume to be rushing over to the café. And that same angelic smile you offer to the barista that greets you, the same one you'd offer him every morning, whether he looked at you or not.

He had no choice but to look now.

Your smile falters into something more nervous, a little melancholic, when your eyes meet his across the café. Though you knew he was going to be there, something in you feels surprised to see him again. Maybe it’s because he isn’t yelling at you or throwing insults at your head this time. Or maybe because he’s actually looking you in the eye. Since when did he get so good at that?

You sit down across him, taking off your coat and putting your bag besides you.

“Hey.” You smile again, much more awkward this time.

“Hey.” He returns the same thin lipped smile.

It’s quiet for a few seconds. Carmen swears the whole café has gone silent in that moment, leaving the two of you to listen to the sound of your own breathing and heartrate picking up. You’re not sure where to look, not being used to being in such an intimate setting with him.

“Do you want a coffee?”

“Sorry I was late.”

You both talk over each other, and the urge to chuckle about it overtakes you. Carmen can’t help but smile as well. You seem nervous, and somehow that puts him a little more at ease. Like he’s not the only one who’s in their head about it.

“Sorry, I, uhm, yeah— I would like a coffee.” You scramble over your words. “Please.”

“Sure,” he nods, “and no worries.”

“Hm?”

“That you were late. I haven’t been here that long either.” He lied. He’d been there half an hour early, cursing himself for letting him sit along with his thoughts for that long and psyching himself out into almost leaving.

You both order and another heavy silence sits between you two. You both know why you’re there, what needs to be talked about. Yet neither of you know how to bring it up.

You’ve lived most of your lives believing this version of each other you had in your minds. Because it kept you grounded. Because it was easier. He never let you in and for the longest time, you were at peace with that. You could have a slightly distant view of who he was, your classmate, your rival. And he could do the same. Keep you out, pretend you were there to keep him on his toes, to always try to outdo him.

Those facades of each other don’t work anymore. The real world has forced you to reconcile with each other, whether you liked it or not.

Your coffee gets brought to your table, and both of you feel this urgency to say something, anything, at least.

“The pastries here are good too, if you want to get one.” He finally broke the awkward silence. He can start with talking about food, something he knows. If all else fails, resort back to that.

“I haven’t tried a pastry besides my own in a long time. Maybe I could learn a thing or two here.” You admit. He knows that feeling. He’s not nearly as adventurous with his food choices as he wants to be, but as a busy chef on the brink of a new entrepreneurship, it’s usually beef sandwiches and frozen meals.

“I think yours were better though.” He takes a sip of his coffee.

“Huh?” You look up, realizing you were avoiding eye contact by staring into your cup.

“The danish I tried at your place. It was fire.”

“Oh. Right. Thank you, we make everything from scratch.”

“I could tell.” He takes another sip. “I guess I— I kinda forgot to tell you that. In the heat of it all.” He huffs to himself. “Food was so good it made me upset.”

“Upset?” His word use frustrates you. Upset is when they forget to give you your sauce with your order. What happened back there was not upset. That was rage. Wrath. You raise an eyebrow and he realizes he said something wrong.

“Well, more than upset. Listen, I— We need to talk about what happened.” His blue eyes peer into your own. They’re almost distracting enough to avoid you noticing his fidgeting hands.

“I’m listening.” You lean back slightly in your seat. You’d played nice with Carmen all your life, given him every chance to return it. Now it was his turn to try.

"Right." Of course he has to talk. It's his fault, isn't it? He's the one who snapped-- why did he even imply you'd have to explain yourself? He runs a hand through his hair, and there he goes again, eyes darting across the café to find something to focus on as he sought out the right words. You'd almost find it endearing, how bad he is at this, if it wasn't so important to you.

"You don't do this often, do you?"

"What, like-- meeting up for coffee?"

"Talking about stuff. Your feelings and shit." You hid your slightly amused smile behind your coffee cup before taking a small sip.

"Oh. Yeah, no, I-- I don't. Not until recently." He takes a deep breath. Just like they had told him to. “I’ve been going to this therapy thing my sister recommended. S’not much, but… It’s a start. Talked about the restaurant, my brother—“

“Your brother?” Your eyebrows raise slightly.

“Yeah, my— my brother. Mikey.” He looks a bit surprised. He’s come to the shattering realization that he’s never told you anything about his personal life, ever. You don’t even know about one of the most important people in his life, his main drive. You’ve known each other for so long yet you know so little. “I never told you about him?”

“You never told me anything.” You answer curtly. “We never really… Talked, you know?”

“Yeah— yeah, you’re right. I just thought… Wow.” He smiles, more out of shock than anything. He feels so stupid. How immature is it to be feuding this much with a person who doesn’t know anything about you?

“I guess I really don’t know much about you either.” His fingers rake through his messy curls again. “Makes me feel like even more of an idiot for going off on you like that. Like I had you all figured out.”

“Yeah, that was uh... That was something." The mood shifts a little. His smile fades as soon as he sees the melancholy in your eyes return. Of course it wouldn't be that easy for you to forgive him, to feel better about all this. "You know, I never knew you thought of me like that." A small smile graces your features. Somehow it's sadder than the expression you had before.

"I mean, I knew you didn't like me. I was pretty much at peace with the fact that you were never going to like me, either. But I never thought you hated me that much." You sniffle, trying your hardest to blink away any oncoming tears. "Like your life, your entire career, would have been easier without me there at all."

His heart aches at the sight of you, all teary eyed and trying to be brave. You're much braver than him. Sadness is a much harder thing to express than anger. He's starting to figure that out more and more.

"I don't hate you." He starts. He sees the confusion contort your features, and he knows he's not making any sense. "I mean I did-- I did hate you. Or, maybe not you, just... The fucked up idea I had of you. And-- and that was on me, that was my own fault." He feels an urge to touch you; to rub your back, hold your hand, anything to comfort you. It's tearing him apart to know that he's the cause of all this.

"But why?" A single tear rolls down your cheek, leaving a wet streak on your skin in its wake. "Why did you think that about me? I-- I get that we had a little rivalry going but jesus Carmen, did you really think I spent my whole culinary school career trying to outdo you?"

"To be honest... Yeah." He feels ashamed. So ashamed. He hopes the waitress doesn't walk by and listen to any of this, see you crying, and make you feel even worse. "Cooking was always just... My thing. If I was good for anything, it would be that. So seeing you do so well at something I'd started to base my whole existence around, it made me jealous, so fucking jealous." He meets your eyes, even if it's hard. You have to know he's being sincere.

"And it's-- it's unfair, it's so unfair to you, I know, and I'm really fuckin' sorry. I'm trying to work on myself, on everything, and I hope I can prove that to you." His face has that red tint you recognize whenever he's nervous or stressed. You can tell this is taking a lot from him.

"Is that really all? You were just jealous?" Your voice is quieter, fragile almost.

"I don't know. I wanna think it's that simple but I really don't know. There's a lot I don't understand about me, or you, or us. My mind doesn't know how to react when I see you anymore I think, now that things are different." He takes a deep breath, like saying that took a physical toll on him. "You have this-- this weird effect on me, and I don't know how to cope with it. I think it was just easier to be mad at you than to be anything else."

Anger is easier to express than sadness. The easiest out of all emotions, actually. Sometimes a little too easy.

You look to the side, wiping your cheek with the back of your hand. You huff out something close to a laugh, and though he’s caught off guard by it, he doesn’t mind it. Even if you’re laughing at him, at least that means you’re not crying.

“You’ve got issues Berzatto. You know that?”

“Yeah. I’ve been told.” He smiles, and it’s heartfelt this time. Not nervous, or sad, or awkward. He’s happy to see you a little more at ease.

“It’s just really crazy to me.” You trace your finger over the edge of your coffee cup as you talk. “I spent so much time in culinary school looking up to you. And then I find out you were always just trying to keep up with me.”

Carmen’s eyebrows raise a little at your words. “Looked up to me?”

“Yeah, like… Your drive, your passion, it’s so impressive. Always looking to improve, to do better, it just— it inspired me to do better too. As cheesy as that may sound.” You smiled. “S’why I opened up in Chicago, you know.”

“Really? Huh.” He leaned back in his seat.

“Because I wanted to work with you. Or for you. Either would have been fine with me.” You sigh. “I like owning my own place, but… I don’t know, for some reason I always imagined us working together.” You smiled. “Is that stupid?”

“No,” he replied quickly, “no not at all, I— I totally get that.” He’s quiet for a few seconds, and you can practically hear the gears turning in his head when he stares at you for a moment.

“I mean you’re a remarkable chef, really, like— insanely remarkable, and, well, we’re revamping the restaurant completely right now. We need people— more people, new people, and so, I was wondering— or I’ve been thinking—“ He stops himself from losing his breath from all his rambling, before he freaks you out even more than he already has.

“I want you to come work for us at the Bear.” He puts his hands together, as if he’s about to beg. “Please.”

You can almost hear yourself blinking out of confusion. There’s suddenly no more loud silences, no, the café seems dead quiet for once. All you can do is stare at him, wait for a laugh, because clearly this was a joke right? There’s no way Carmen Berzatto, chef supreme, arch nemesis of yours, would want you anywhere near him, let alone work in his own establishment.

“I’m sorry?”

He feels stupid already. You had every reason to say no. He’d been the biggest asshole in the world to you, he’d kept his distance all his life, and now he expects you to be his employee. Or, well, colleague, more so.

“I’m uh— we’re redoing the restaurant entirely. New equipment, new staff, new everything.” He swallows; the thought of everything that needed to be done arises for a moment. “We need people that work hard, who know what they’re doing and who are passionate about it. And I barely know anyone who’s better at what you do than yourself.” He pauses, waiting for you to stop him. But you don’t.

“So I’m asking if you’d work for me. With me. It won’t be anything like old days, if anything I— I need to learn from you.” He scoffs at himself. “Could take a thing or two about how to communicate with my staff.”

You smile, and he genuinely thinks you’re about to start laughing at him. You chuckle, but it’s not mean, it’s honest. Cute.

“You know, you have great timing.” You grin.

“I do?” the smile on his face reflects the hope he feels.

“One of my chefs wants to take over the place for me. Well, has been wanting to. I haven’t had an exact reason to say yes to her yet.” You shrugged. “Guess I do now.”

“…Is that you saying yes?”

“It’s definitely not me saying no.” Your eyes meet his, and there’s something between you both that’s different now. It’s not like there’s a switch that’s been flipped. It‘s more like this conversation was the turning page of a new chapter.

“I’ll think about it. I want to see it first. Maybe talk to some of your staff.” Carmen’s chest strains a little when he thinks about you interacting with Richie. Then he’s reassured when he thinks about you interacting with Sydney or Marcus. You’d fit in well, you have great feeling for people.

“Yeah— yeah, I get that. Totally. I can arrange that. Uhm, we’re renovating right now, actually, it’s all really kinda wild, but if you wanna stop by, chat with Syd, or Nat, or talk about the plans, let me know. I’m sure they’d love to talk to you.” He’s not lying, you seem like you’d get along well with them. Especially Sydney. Your thinking processes are very similar to each other. And to his.

Carmen gets the bill, even though you try to pay for it.

“It’s just a coffee, just let me get this one.”

You let him have this one, simply because you can’t argue with him after the conversation you just had. You’re in too good of a mood after his proposition too.

He walks you to your car, hands in his pockets when you reach it. It’s cold outside, and his breath comes out in visible puffs of air. His nose is a little red, but you think it looks cute.

“Thanks for coming, by the way,” he starts, “I know you didn’t have to. Like— after how I acted to you. But— But I really do appreciate that you’re givin' me a chance here.” He’d always been confused about how positive and faithful you were in people. He never thought he’d be grateful for those exact features too.

“No worries, I… I had a good time. I’m glad we talked.” The keys jingle as you fidget with them. Among them is a keychain in the shape of a cherry, he recognizes it. It reminds him of how little you’ve both changed. And how much.

“Yeah.” He sighs. Relieved, almost. “Me too. But I’ll let you leave, might wanna tell your chef the good news.”

“Good news?” You quirk an eyebrow.

“That you’re selling them the business.”

“I haven’t decided yet, Carm.” You scoff. But he can tell you have, you look too excited about it all to not have your mind made up yet. It excites him too. Scares him a bit as well, but what’s a new chapter without a bit of tension?

“Right. Sorry.” He huffs. “Just text me when you wanna head over to see the place. It’s uh… It’s a work in progress, but it’s getting somewhere.”

“I believe you. I’m looking forward to it.” You lean back against your car a little.

“Yeah. Me too.”

“See y’around?” You unlock it and walk up to the driver’s side.

“Course. Uh, don’t be a stranger.”

You grin, leaning down to get into the vehicle. “Never with you, Berzatto.”

He watches you drive off, standing in the cold for far longer than any sensible person has any business standing there. But he feels good. He feels warm.

He thinks about what you said to him before you left. You were right, you were never a stranger to him. You were always like a constant in his life; whether you were actually present or not. And even if he didn’t know that much about you, which he was insistent on changing, you were never a stranger.

Never with him.

tag list <3

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[ssahotstuff]

Hiii! Would you be able to write a Hotch x female reader smut where he has an innocence kink ? Maybe virgin reader as well?

This was so much fun to write! Let me know if I should do a part 2 about reader touching Aaron for the first time! 🥰

Warnings; innocence kink, virgin reader, first time, oral, fem receiving, fingering, unprotected sex, cursing, phone sex kinda, dirty talking

Word Count: 5.9k

Aaron was well aware of the fact that you had never been touched. You had sheepishly told him during a heavy make out session one night months ago, but you had given him the okay to take your virginity whenever he saw fit. The opportunity hadn't arose for Aaron to make it special for you yet, so it hadn't came up, but he was aching to touch you. Given the fact that he'd be the only man to ever have his hands on you, it made his head spin—but the effect you had on him was dizzying nonetheless.

He often thought about using his mouth to spread you open, how you would taste writhing under his touch. He'd day dream about giving you your first orgasm, what you'd look like coming undone under the mercy of his tongue. He'd fuck his fist to the thought of you naked and ready for him, his cock throbbing at the image of him slipping into you, going as slow as possible as he gently eased into you. He'd lost count at how many times he'd had an orgasm thinking about giving you pleasure for the first time.

Aaron had decided he'd try to initiate things when he came home. He was still away on a case for now, missing you terribly. He'd just gotten back to his hotel for the night when he decided it wasn't too late to call you, sitting down on the edge of his bed with a heavy sigh as the phone rang in his ear.

"Hi baby," you greeted him, thrilled to hear his voice. You'd been thinking of him nonstop, and you were happy he'd called, even if it was only for a few minutes before bed.

"Hi, sweetheart. I hope it isn't too late, I just couldn't stop thinking about you," he admitted, the heat rising to his cheeks when he realized how bad he had it for you—he was absolutely smitten, as in love as he could possibly get with no chance of slowing down any time soon.

"You can call me whenever you want, you know that," you assured him, just thankful to hear his voice. You worried more than usual when he was away, often afraid of what might happen to him, and not being able to stop it.

"Tell me about your day, don't leave anything out," he asked, and he listened happily as you told him about the mundane parts of your day and how work had been. Your evening had been more than uneventful as you'd spent most of it on the couch, glass of wine in tow, thinking about the man that you loved. You'd been ready to give your body to him for longer than you wanted to admit, but he'd been waiting patiently for what he thought was the right time. You told him you were ready whenever he was, and until he decided it was perfect, you'd be happy to wait.

Aaron was having a hard time holding back with you. Every time you were in his bed, he wanted to give himself to you in as many possible ways as he could. He'd already decided when it happened, it would be all about you—he'd spend the entire evening making sure you knew what real pleasure was before he ever did anything selfishly. Getting the privilege of touching you was a reward enough in his eyes; if he had anything to say about it, he'd be the only person to touch you in your life—he wanted forever with you.

"Any chance I'll get to sleep next to you soon?" You asked him, holding your breath for the answer; you knew sometimes it took a while to finish up on cases, and you didn't expect this to be any different.

"I hope we can wrap things up in the next day or so. Having you in my bed has been on my mind heavily," he chuckled, and you quickly started to piece together that his words had more than one meaning.

"You can have me whenever you want," you breathed, anxious to hear what he had to say back. Sometimes Aaron didn't pick up on your flirtiness, or if he did, he wasn't sure what to do about it. That wasn't the case this time—he had heard you loud and clear.

"I've got plans involving you and my bed when I get home. But I'm taking you out first, spoiling you as much as I can," his voice had gotten dangerously low, causing a shiver down your spine at the implication that it would be happening, and sooner than you thought.

"Oh? Sounds like I need to buy something to wear," you'd use any excuse to find something to look good for him in, and you'd spied a red dress at a boutique earlier in the week that was dying to be worn, and now you had the perfect reason to buy it.

"Something that's relatively easy to take off, I hope," he joked, but it caused the heat to pool between your thighs at the thought of him undressing you.

"I'm sure you know your way around a zipper," you chirped back, and he laughed, making you smile wide. It was one of your favorite sounds, and he seemed to be doing it more often with you around.

"I'll manage regardless. You know, I don't think you understand how special it is to me that you're letting me be your first," it was more than special to him—it was something sacred that he'd cherish forever. He thought you were the most incredible person he'd ever met—he hadn't been expecting you, but he'd fallen for you so quickly that anything before you seemed irrelevant. You'd been so accepting of him and Jack, loving the two of them unconditionally and becoming someone Jack could depend on as well. Jack had spent plenty of nights at your apartment while Aaron was away on a case, spending time with you, bonding. The two of you were close, and Aaron loved that. It filled him with so much adoration for you that sometimes he wondered how he ever lived so long without you.

"You know, it would make me really happy if you were the only person to ever touch me," you told him, met with a harsh gulp on the other end of the line. Aaron opened his mouth, but nothing would come out—he was stunned into silence, but his mind was running rampant. You wanted him forever, and that was hard for him to process at first. He'd never expected you to say it, although he'd known for a while now that you were what he wanted too. You were the perfect match for him, and he'd do anything in his power to keep you around for as long as possible.

"Do you mean that?" He didn't mean to doubt you—more than anything, he just needed the reassurance of your love, in whatever form you could give it to him.

"Of course I do. Honestly, Aaron... It's all I think about," you felt a bit bashful admitting it, but given your inexperience, when Aaron agreed to be your first, the thoughts of what exactly that entailed invaded your mind and wouldn't get out. In the shower, on the way to work—but especially now, when you were alone in bed late at night. Sometimes you'd think about touching yourself, but you weren't sure what would feel good, and you knew waiting on Aaron would be worth it in the long run.

"Oh, sweetheart... I've imagined it so many times, all of the ways I'm going to make you feel so good," he purred, and you found yourself nearly whimpering at his words, melting at his deep, silky voice and his promise to give you what you'd been craving for so long.

"Me too. I can't wait to feel your hands, what they feel like on my body. I can't wait to make you feel good too—I really want to touch you, Aaron," you were a soaked mess, and hearing him groan on the other end of the line wasn't helping any.

"Sweet girl, don't worry about me. All I want you to concern your pretty little head with is enjoying yourself. You've gone so long untouched...I can't wait for you to know what it feels like, to see what you look like when you have your first orgasm," you released a breath you didn't even know you'd been holding, more than curious as to what it would feel like. You had no doubt he'd be loving, careful with you, and you were excited to learn all of the ways you could touch him too. You'd done some research, so you weren't completely naive, and you were hoping he'd give you the chance to show him what you learned.

"Come home to me soon, please. I don't know if I can go much longer without you," you whined, knowing he couldn't help it, but you wanted him back so terribly, you were willing to go to Ohio to solve the case on your own if it meant bringing him back sooner.

"I know, sweetheart. Going to pick you up as soon as I get back, keep you at my place for as long as I can. I can't wait to kiss you...all over, every inch of you," he told you, making your toes curl up in anticipation at what was to come—you could hardly contain yourself.

"Wish you could feel me right now; my panties are ruined," Aaron's cock throbbed against the hem of his slacks, precum no doubt staining his boxers as he palmed himself without abandon, licking his lips at the thought of dragging his tongue through your center, watching your eyes roll back as he fucked you with his tongue.

"I'm dying to taste you, baby. Going to spend half of the night between your legs; I can't wait to learn your body," you could hear the desperation laced in his words, and you knew he was probably aching to be touched just as badly as you were.

"Been dreaming about tasting you too, Aaron. I want to try everything with you," Aaron was coming unraveled at your words, nearly ready to cum in his pants at the idea of your lips wrapped around his cock. He let his eyes close and pictured you on your knees, his cock in your hand as you looked to him to teach you what to do. He couldn't wait to show you, to guide you through everything for the first time. Your lack of experience was something that Aaron found himself pondering on often. You were gorgeous—plenty of people saw that. People should've been lining up to want their shot at you, and you hadn't hesitated to tell him you'd been asked out a lot, but no one had caught your interest like he did.

He felt like the most special man in the world.

Every time he kissed you, he wondered how he got so lucky. You were a godsend, and he was going to keep you in his life permanently, if you'd let him. He was addicted to you—he had to be careful at work or his thoughts would run wild, trained on you and the things you made him feel. He hadn't loved anyone in a long time, and he certainly hadn't expected it to come so easily. The words had rolled off his tongue the first time, and after a sweet but greedy kiss, you were telling him that you loved him too, and he could breathe a sigh of relief that you wanted to be kept by him.

"I'll teach you whatever you want to learn, sweetheart. I love you so much, all I want is for you to be happy."

He smiled when he heard your cute little breathless laugh on the other end, and he could practically hear the smile on your face as you spoke. These little things you did without even realizing it were Aaron's green light to fall head over heels for you, because it was obvious you were doing the same.

"I love you, Aaron. I've never been so happy in my life," you promised him, yawning into the receiver as you came to lay on the pillows, putting your phone on speaker.

"Sweet girl, get some sleep. I'll text you in the morning, I'm going to try my best to make it home to you soon," he wouldn't rest until they'd put this case behind them and he was on the jet coming back to you.

"I know you will. Sweet dreams, Aaron. I love you," he was quick to tell you back, hanging up the phone and laying back on his bed for a moment, staring up at the ceiling. He knew he'd have to go slow when he finally had you, or else he'd get ahead of himself. He was already going mad at the mere thought, what your soft, delicate body would feel like, the sweet taste of your arousal as he finally had the privilege of tasting you. The thoughts were overwhelming until Derek knocked on his door to tell him there was a break in the case and that they were needed with the Local PD.

✨✨✨

When morning came, your first order of business was to find something that would drive Aaron wild. You got dressed and drove straight to the boutique where you'd seen the red dress, not thinking twice when you swiped your card. You did a little more shopping, deciding on a lacy white bra and panty set that you knew would get him going, and by the time you stopped for coffee, he was calling.

"Hi baby," he nearly melted at your words every time you spoke, that was nothing new for him. He loved your voice, to listen to you talk about any and everything that was on your mind.

"Hi sweetheart. I'll be home in a couple of hours. If you want to be ready, I'll pick you up and we'll go out to dinner," Aaron had already picked the place—it was one of the nicest spots in town, and he knew you would love it. Afterwards, he planned to bring you home, make you as comfortable as possible before the rest of your evening began. He knew you'd been waiting far too long, and he himself had been bouncing off the rafters waiting for the night to come. In just a few short hours, he'd finally have you.

"I'll be ready. I can't wait to see you," you told him, but Aaron was equally excited to see you. If he could will the jet to go faster, he would—a 3 and a half hour flight seemed like forever when he knew you were waiting for him.

"I'm so excited, sweetheart. Remember, all about you tonight. I hope you're ready," you could hear the want in his voice, his eagerness to have your body, it made you feel like one of the most coveted women alive.

"More than ready," you assured him, wishing him a safe flight as he got ready to take off, leaving you to get ready, making sure every aspect of your hair and outfit was perfect by the time Aaron arrived.

You'd checked your appearance nearly a dozen times in the mirror when he knocked on the door, giving you no more time to second guess yourself. You felt silly for ever doubting yourself when you opened the door and saw Aaron's reaction to your outfit. The collar of his black dress shirt grew tight as he reached for your waist to pull you in closer, his lips brushing your jaw before he came in for a kiss.

"Sweetheart, I don't know what to say. I've never seen anything quite like you before," he whispered against your lips, his hand coming to cup your face as he let his eyes trail over your body once more. The truth was, you'd stunned him into silence—no one had ever went out of their way to want to look good for him, and it only solidified his thoughts that you were meant for him completely.

"You look so good, Aaron," you told him before kissing him again, your fingers on his collar, tugging him closer. He let his arms wrap around you, forgetting where you were momentarily as his tongue slipped into your mouth. You whimpered softly, which only made Aaron come closer, his hands roaming your body openly, hidden only by the darkness surrounding the two of you. It took everything in him to pull away from you, wanting to march you inside and undress you before you'd even eaten. With one last kiss, he led you to the car, moving the center console up so you could sit next to him in the middle. His hand found yours, holding it tightly as he navigated you through the city.

Aaron had chosen a ridiculously fancy restaurant, the two of you skipping wine and opting for water. You wanted a clear head and assumed he felt the same. His eyes never left you once, only briefly while he ordered his food. His hand reached for yours across the table and you took it happily, smiling back at him over the table. He was breathtaking in all black, your mind honed in on the idea of stripping him down, kissing every inch of his sexy broad chest and his long arms. You knew by the gleam in his eye that his thoughts were similar, and even though the conversation was light throughout dinner, the sexual tension was heavy and thick enough to slice with a butter knife.

Aaron couldn't stop thinking about how good you looked. He knew from the men who were shamelessly throwing glances in your direction that he was a lucky man, and he'd never do anything to jeopardize his relationship with you. He'd decided early on that he'd do anything he could to keep you, wanting you around more every time he saw you. That still hadn't changed—he craved your presence, uneasy if he wasn't around you.

By the time you left the restaurant, Aaron's palms were sweaty and his mouth was dry. The closer he got to his house, the harder it became to pay attention to the road and not to you—your hand was on his thigh, absentmindedly brushing against him, and it was making it difficult for him to concentrate. His free hand moved to your bare thigh, feeling your satiny smooth skin; he sighed to himself, wondering if you were this soft everywhere. He had no doubt that you were, and it was all for him.

Once you were finally at his house, he led you inside, opting to bring you straight to the bedroom. He closed the door gently behind him, watching you closely as you sat on the edge of the bed. He came to stand in front of you, silently reaching for your foot so he could remove your heels. He let them fall to the floor, his eyes traveling up your legs until he was looking into your eyes.

Aaron was feeling an abundance of emotions all at once. He was overcome with so much love for you that he wasn't sure what to do with himself. He was only a little nervous, but mostly because he was afraid you wouldn't enjoy yourself—he tried not to let the doubt creep into his mind and ruin the evening though. You were both consenting adults, and you wanted this just as badly as him—he knew that for a fact. He was especially eager—he had been since your phone conversation the night before, thinking about it long after you'd hung up for the night.

"You're so gorgeous, sweetheart. I can't keep my eyes off of you," he leaned forward to kiss you, holding your face firmly in his hands as your tongues tangled together; you were squirming in your seat at the thought of him using his mouth on you, buzzing internally at the fact that he wanted to taste you so badly. No one had ever wanted you like Aaron did; he'd went out of his way to show you from the very first day. Aaron was the type to shower you with compliments, to make you feel good about yourself in every aspect as if he'd spoken it into existence. You believed every word that came out of his mouth, trusted him beyond a shadow of a doubt, which was why you'd taken the chance on him in the first place. Unlike with other men, you didn't hesitate to give Aaron your phone number, and you actively kept in contact with him even before you were dating; he'd call you in the morning and before bed, just to let you know he was thinking about you. Becoming his girlfriend had been the easiest decision you'd ever made, and you were proud to be his.

"It's all for you," you told him, watching his cheeks redden as he grew bashful—it was always a sight to see; he often didn't realize how incredible he truly was, and you were quick to remind him. You loved getting dressed up for him, making a spectacle out of belonging to him. You knew he appreciated the effort, though you were glad to do it for him. He deserved someone who would go to any length for him, and you planned to be that person.

Aaron wanted you to be comfortable first. When he joined you on the bed, his hands came to your thighs, his fingers massaging your bare skin just below your dress. He began kissing you, first your shoulder, working his way to your neck; his nose brushed along your jaw as he came to your mouth, kissing you slowly, delicately. It was sweet, your strong, stern man taking things at a new speed, you knew it was taking all of his restraint not to undress you.

You found your way into his lap, arms snaked around his neck as the two of you made out like mad, his hands on your waist. He kissed you for a while longer before he pulled away, toying with the straps of your dress.

"Can I see you, pretty girl?"

You gave him a nod and decided you'd stand up and do the honors, letting him unzip your dress so it could fall to the floor. Aaron saw what you were wearing and found himself struggling to think straight. He wondered if you'd worn white just for him, something about the lacy set made it even better for him, because he knew you'd never worn anything like that for anyone else before. He didn't try to hide the effect you had on him, his cock throbbing wildly in his slacks as he looked at you.

"You're divine, baby. So fucking pretty," he groaned as you laid next to him on the bed, propped up on your side so you could see him.

"You like it? I bought it just for you," you said, earning a nod in response as he came forward to pepper your chest with warm, open mouthed kisses. It covered you in goosebumps, the sensation of his lips on your flushed skin.

"I love it, I think you look perfect, sweetheart." Aaron's mind was reeling now that he was touching you, his hands a bit shaky but overall, he felt nothing but love. He tentatively reached behind you to feel for the clasp to your bra, and after looking to you to make sure it was okay, he was undoing it and letting your bra join your dress in the floor. Aaron's mouth immediately latched on to one of your nipples, his free hand rolling the other between his fingers. You moaned, pushing your chest forward for him. He sucker your nipples until they were puffy and stiff, stopping long enough to pull back at look at you.

"Lay down for me," he instructed, putting a pile of pillows behind your head. You watched with wide eyes as he unbuttoned his shirt, tossing it aside before tugging his T-shirt over his head. Your hand made its way to his chest, feeling the sexy, scarred flesh as he turned towards you, his fingertips trailing up your thigh. He was nearly at your panty line, taking a deep breath as he hooked his fingers in the waistband of your panties.

"Can I take these off?"

You nodded, letting him undress you completely, trying not to be self conscious about being naked around him. Aaron couldn't believe his eyes; he'd never seen a human being so perfect in his life, and he planned to make sure you knew exactly how amazing he thought you were. He couldn't stop staring, his mouth slightly agape as he blinked at you, making sure you wouldn't disappear once he closed his eyes.

"Perfect, every bit of you," he breathed, ducking down to kiss your thighs. Aaron was certain he'd never want another human being again, not as long as you were alive. Every inch of you was spectacular to him, so much so that he was dizzy with lust—he found his gaze lingering on your core, glistening for him, just waiting for his touch. He sucked marks onto your skin, making you wiggle against the bed, letting out a breathless moan as he began to move upward towards your center.

Secretly, Aaron couldn't wait to corrupt you. Teaching you to touch him, and yourself eventually, sparking your curiosity for new things you could try together. He knew you'd get the hang of things easily, but that would come later. For now, he was focused on spreading your legs, getting you to open up for him.

"Relax, baby. I've got you, okay? If you need me to stop for anything, just tell me. I want to make sure there's nothing but pleasure for you," he lowered himself between your legs, the intoxicating smell of your arousal invading his nostrils and temporarily shutting down his senses. He let out a deep breath as he looked to you, laid out on the pillows, watching his every move. He was close enough to see your clit throbbing, your pussy clenching around nothing as he came closer. The heat of his mouth was enough to have you whimpering, your brain going white hot as his tongue dove eagerly into your center.

You hadn't expected it to feel so good. You had no doubt it would be amazing, but you'd vastly underestimated how much. You were a moaning mess, a few swipes of his tongue away from your first orgasm. Aaron knew you were close, and he was watching you carefully. He couldn't wait to see your face as you came, and then he had every intention of doing it again.

Your voice got caught in your throat, your legs shook even under the weight of Aaron's arms on top of them. The euphoria was overpowering, enough to leave you breathing heavily. You looked back at him, a satisfied smirk on his face; he'd stopped long enough to let you work through your orgasm and then he was back at it, lapping eagerly at your drenched pussy. He moaned into you, gripping your thighs possessively as his tongue swirled around inside of you, bringing you over the edge even quicker than the first time. This time, Aaron didn't stop to let you recover, he was sucking furiously at your clit as you rode out your high—you barely had time to bounce back before you were shaking again, a hum of satisfaction leaving Aaron's lips.

"You taste so good, baby. My sweet, innocent girl is making a mess all over my tongue," that was the last you heard from him for nearly half an hour— he stayed between your legs, giving you more than a handful of orgasms, clearly having the time of his life, so you didn't want to stop him. It felt too good, heavenly—he knew exactly what he was doing.

Aaron was so lost in the moment, starstruck every time he was able to make you cum. He was absolutely enthralled by you, obsessed with the way you tasted, wanting to stay between your legs for as long as he could. Your body shook as you came, and Aaron sighed to himself, so happy with the way things had been going so far.

"You're doing so good, sweetheart. I'm going to use my fingers too, is that okay?"

You nodded back at him, propping up on your elbows so you could watch. He was mesmerizing, and you couldn't peel your eyes away from him. His long, thick fingers teased your entrance, coating his digits with your arousal before he slowly slipped a finger inside of you. As soon as you got used to it, you wanted more, thrusting your hips upward as your orgasm rocked your body.

"More, Aaron, please," you panted, his eyebrow raised as he looked up at you.

"You're sure, baby? Tell me if it's too much," he carefully added another finger, staying perfectly still until your body was adjusted; once he realized you were okay, he began to pump in and out of you, his fingers hitting your sweet spot, driving you absolutely wild. Your chest heaved as he sped up slightly, his eyes trained on you to make sure it wasn't too much, that you were alright.

Aaron was still partially in disbelief that he was actually touching you—he'd almost came in his pants twice while going down on you, simply because you'd  it so much. Aaron had planned to spend all night  giving you the love you deserved, as long as you were okay with it. Now that he'd had a taste of you, he couldn't get enough.

"I want you, Aaron," you said finally, tired of waiting; you needed to feel him, experience what it was like to be touched by someone who loved you endlessly. Aaron gave you a nod, sitting up so he could finish undressing. Once he was completely naked, you wondered how he'd possibly fit inside of you—you hadn't expected him to be so big, but given his attitude, you weren't at all surprised.

"I'll go slow, be as gentle as I can. We can stop any time you need to," he reminded you, lining up with you as he took a deep breath. You tried to relax your body as best as you could, mentally preparing yourself to take him—you'd been slightly intimidated for a moment, but you knew he would take care of you, so that eased your worries tremendously. After what seemed like an eternity, he was cautiously pressing into you, easing into you inch by inch. There was a lot of pressure at first, but there was a lot of him to get used to. He stayed completely still, letting you take as much time as you needed; Aaron knew he wouldn't last long, not with the way you were squeezing him so tight.

Aaron let out a breath, looking at your body laid out just for him—he'd never felt so loved, never experienced anything like the sensation he was overcame with now. He saw his life with you, laid out like he was viewing a scrapbook. He saw a ring on your finger, and a house full of brown eyed children with your sweet smile. Aaron knew his future was with you, and you confirmed it every time you whimpered his name. It was melodious to him; he couldn't get enough of it, of you.

"You can keep going," you told him finally, and Aaron bit his lip harshly, nodding as he began to move. A soft smile rested on your face as his hips rolled into you, steady and precise. It wasn't long before he was leaning down, kissing you with every bit of love he had to give. He stayed close, propped up on his elbows as he took his time with you; you'd never seen a more patient, caring man, someone who would go out of their way to be so loving with you—you hoped he was around to stay. You wanted a life with him, to grow with him.

"How do you feel? Can you handle more?" He was hesitant to speed things up without your permission, but you nodded, kissing the corner of his mouth, bringing your hands to the back of his head to keep him near you.

“Feels so good. You can go faster,” you said, hushed and low, making Aaron kiss you hard on the mouth. You were doing so good, he was so happy things were going well; he’d been nervous that something would go wrong, but it had all been in his head. Now that you were here, everything was perfect.

He started to move faster, making him grit his teeth together as he buried himself deeper inside of you. You were experiencing something foreign—it was like love, but stronger. You’d never felt so connected to anyone, like your entire life had been leading up to Aaron and the happiness he could bring to you.

You were getting close, Aaron could tell by the way your breathing had changed; he took that as a signal that he could go a bit faster, and he was rewarded by you gripping the sheets, letting your eyes flutter shut as the buzz of pleasure took you over. Aaron was in love with the faces you made, how you looked so good when you came—he could hardly control his own orgasm, so he wasn’t surprised at all when he poured into you, groaning your name as his mouth connected with yours once more. His hand brushed your hair out of your face, his forehead pressed against yours as he eased out of you, his arms holding the majority of his weight as he positioned his body to cradle yours. His arms wrapped around you, pulling you closer to him.

“Tell me what you’re feeling. Are you okay?” You could hear the concern in his voice, but it nearly melted away when you leaned up to kiss him, your hands on his face. You couldn’t wipe the smile from your lips, your body buzzing with excitement, your adrenaline pumping.

“I feel great, Aaron. That was perfect—you’re perfect,” he blushed at your words, nuzzling closer to you than before; he was so warm, it was making your eyes heavy before you realized it.

“You’re the perfect one, sweetheart. This has been the best night of my life, I couldn’t ask for anything better,” he sighed, his eyes closing as he settled in on the pillow, kissing your forehead lightly as his breathing began to steady.

“I love you, Aaron. Thank you.”

He let out a breathless little laugh, snuggling closer to you than before, his body going still within seconds.

“I love you. You don’t ever have to thank me; I’m yours whenever you want.”

You were completely content. Aaron had made the night a memorable one, but you knew this was just the beginning. There was so much more in store for the two of you—and you couldn’t wait. 

Master tags: @wheelsupkels @periodtcevans @hausofwhores @criminallyobsessedcm @tojithesourcerkiller @fireworksinthesky

[deadpool15]

This is fucking bullshit. All of this is so stupid. I’m gonna kick his fucking ass. Me and Woo-Jin had been kinda on and off for about two years, at first it was fine because I wasn’t ready to settle down so it was all fun and games. But now I’ve been trying to slowly show him I’m ready for the real thing. Full on relationship, our parents had already met, with my parents practically becoming friends for life with his after agreeing to endorse his father’s campaign. His mother constantly telling me how much of a good daughter I am, and how she views me as her own.

Everything was slowly coming together until that fucking teacher arrived. Her nasty disgusting elderly ass decides to fuck my man. It seems like no one in this school realized Woo-Jin belonged to me. Not even him, well not yet. Storming through the school with my shirt slightly unbuttoned from the top leaving my sloppy tie on display just how I like it. It’s a style. Skirts were always a hit or miss for me, seemed no one in Korea understood the struggles of having a fat ass. My knee-high socks had fallen down slightly revealing a few of my tattoos. Shall I say baddest bitch at school for you. Yes, yes indeed.

I make my way up to our special classroom where I had told the man himself to meet me. Walking in the room I notice He-ra in there as well. Now before you say it that’s my bitch. Love her to death. But now isn’t the time for her and her constant back talk that I know she will give without explanation. “He-ra I love you so much babe, but I’m about to embarrass the fuck outta your bestie right now so can you please give us a minute. And I mean go to class not wait outside and listen this time.” She turns to me grabbing her things, “I wasn’t gonna listen to your guys speak, last time I tried to ease drop on you two felt like I was listening to unfiltered porn.”

Watching her walk out the room I see him sitting there smirking. “Stop that you make me sick. You piece of shit.” He motions for me to come closer as I was standing up still. Dropping my bag on the floor, I sit in the chair next to him only for him to grab my arm and push me into his lap. “What’s wrong, Cherie? And what are you gonna embarrass me with?” Pushing his hands that had landed on my hips off me, I sit firmly. Feeling the tension in the room. “When where u gonna tell me you are into old broke bitches now, huh? Miss me that much? You have your sluts acting out of order around me.” He tries to speak up but I place my finger on his plump lips. Causing him to slowly wrap his lips around my finger.

Wow can’t believe he is playing dirty right now. Two can play that game. “Guess your skills are getting old, it’s not working for you anymore is that it baby, is that why you are fucking old women now.” He removes his lips from my fingers and starts leaving kisses on my neck. Open-mouthed kisses are my fucking weakness and he knows this. “What did she say to you?” For a minute I couldn’t respond. I was lying through my teeth this entire time his skills always worked but I knew so did mine. “Kept trying to speak to me saying how worried she was about me since she has noticed me and you barely talk. She wanted to offer me a moment to let out my emotional side and show her how impacted I am now that you have moved on to someone new apparently. Messy ass teacher.”

Hearing this he stopped, “aww are you jealous, baby?” Seeing the mischievous smile on his amazing face almost made me crumble until I started to lean in for him to show off something I know would get me victory. “Is that a fucking hickey? Cherie you’re not serious right, no marks we talked about that. You have shitty guys leaving marks on your body to remember them.” He gripped my neck once he realized I was smiling, “Oo I didn’t even notice he was mainly focused on my bottom half when he did that, guess that’s my bad.” Chuckling and making my way to move off of his lap until he gripped my hips keeping me firmly placed glued to him. “No more of that, me and you that’s it. You only need me, how many times do I have to fuck you to prove that huh? Do you hate walking, is that it?”

“You’re sleeping around too, asshole. Get that dog under control and maybe I’ll let you have me. Any way you want it baby.” He smiles at me before unlocking his phone and pressing the camera icon. “What are you doing, sending her photos Woo-Jin? Wow you truly don’t give a fuck about me do you. Such an asshole.” He wipes my tears before leaning in to kiss me softly. “Cherie I like you so much, actually I fucking love you. Everything about you. I’m not sending her pictures, two options ok. I could text her it’s over or I could bend you over this chair and fuck you til you’re begging me to stop and send it to her. But, something tells me you like the second option more.”

Leaning closer to bite his ear, I whisper, “how many rounds can you give me before next class, huh pretty boy?” He grabs my breast, before kissing my ear. “My next course doesn’t start until 4, it’s currently 1. Which means we have to test this theory, are you up for it beautiful?” Unbuttoning his shirt, while spreading my hands across his chest I nod. “Always up for a challenge, pretty boy. But can you handle it. I don’t move at that same pace as you’re used to now. Since you have downgraded to fucking the retirement community. Can you even keep up?” He pulls me closer kissing my hands. “Can I, handle you? Baby you’re not leaving this room til you tap out.”

“Say less, pretty boy.”