#like hes still a reckless little shit who likes self sacrifice;; too much but not rly when it comes to fights

[haomnyangz]

i dont think ive ever talked abt this here but forever obsessed w/ the difference in aerrow vs carver fights 1x01 nd 2x08

like in 1x01 aerrow has literally just been knighted and has never fought in a one on one Real Fight which shows by the way hes just yeeting himself on the offensive like the child has no concept of Defense in that fight hes just angry

and hes still angry in 2x08 but hes not letting it make him reckless all his movements r Calculated and Seasoned and also way more defensive which is expected since he fought A Lot in between these episodes

and ALSO he can only do his fancy little move in 1x01 bc carver pisses him off but 2x08 hes just doing it for the drama of it all for the cameras dahling

its good choreography choices brent

[makeste]

I like Bakuguo but his attitude is starting to really piss me off. He's talking about Daku as if he's just ~crazy~ and as if he isn't partly to blame for Deku's toxic self-worth issues. It's infuriating to watch. If Bakuguo doesn’t admit out loud and in front of his friends that his bullying of Deku played a part in Deku's current destructive state and if he doesn’t verbally apologize and reaffirm Deku's worth then I can no longer like Bakuguo's character or Hori's writing.

tbh I don't really know why this is the discourse of choice for people all of a sudden, but this is already the second ask I've gotten about it, so I might as well address it lol.

I think fandom is conflating fanon!Deku and canon!Deku here again. fanon Deku is of course much more sensitive and woobified and has much shakier self-esteem. fanon Deku is the one that turns evil in so many AUs because of Kacchan's bullying. fanon Deku is the one that actually jumps off the roof in so many fics, as opposed to fishing his notebook back out of the pond a few minutes later grumbling about how Kacchan needs to think before he speaks or else he could land himself in serious shit one day if god forbid anyone actually does take his cruel words to heart.

and just to clarify before I get any further, I am not saying this to excuse Kacchan's actions in any way, because what he did was still completely terrible and unacceptable and WAY over the line, and what's more he knew it, too. the bullying was still shitty and horrible and awful, and definitely impacted Deku and made him miserable. I fully acknowledge that, and that Kacchan has a lot of atoning to do for it. this is not a "Kacchan did nothing wrong" post.

but that being said, I don't think canon Deku's reckless self-sacrificing nature actually has anything to do with the bullying. I think they're two completely separate things. canon Deku actually has pretty decent self-esteem in spite of everything Kacchan did to him. canon Deku doesn't think he is useless. canon Deku had a wholeass fight with Kacchan less than 10 chapters into the series in which he explicitly spelled it out for Kacchan that he had a lot of worth, and was going to prove it to him. canon Deku was persistent in wanting to become a hero and hoping and believing that he could find some way in spite of being quirkless. canon Deku never let go of that dream even when no one else supported it. I don't think he would have even given up on it after being told no by All Might, tbh -- we just never got to see how it would have played out because of everything that happened with the sludge monster shortly afterward. but he's not the type to ever give up on something that easily, and we've seen that. canon Deku never thought he was useless, but rather wanted to prove to everyone else that he wasn't.

the drive that Deku has to save and protect others even at the expense of his own safety is something entirely separate from that. he doesn't break his body for others simply because he has no self-esteem and thinks that his own life isn't important. he does it because he can't stand the thought of someone else getting hurt, and knowing that he could have done something to prevent it. it's as simple as that. like, Spider-Man has the whole "with great power comes great responsibility" thing, right? and he doesn't have low self-esteem; he simply believes that if he has the ability to help someone else, then he has a responsibility to help them. it's a personal creed. and Deku is based on Spider-Man. his philosophy is based on that philosophy, which was one of Horikoshi's core influences and is one of the core creeds in superhero fiction.

Deku is self-destructive not because he doesn't value himself, but because he is literally physically incapable of standing back and doing nothing if he knows that he can do something. he's the type of person who sees a car speeding towards someone and leaps in to push them out of the way. NOT because he wants to get himself fucking pancaked by a speeding car, but simply because he can't sit back and watch the other person get hurt without taking action. his body moves before he can think. and that's where the whole "doesn't take himself into account" thing comes in -- the fact that his thought process simply stops at "get them out of the way of the car", and never extends beyond that to "hey, and maybe I should try to find a way to do this that doesn't involve me getting hit in their place." to him, that's simply less important than the first priority, which is getting the other person out of the way.

and regarding that last part, while that may seem like a self-worth issue if he's prioritizing everyone else above himself, I think what it actually is just selflessness taken to extremes. like for instance, when a parent sacrifices themselves to save their child, them placing the child's life above their own isn't necessarily because they don't see themselves as having value. rather, it's that they love the child so much that they place their well-being even above their own. and that's what Deku is like as well. except that in his case he cares about EVERYONE, and so is willing to sacrifice himself for anyone. and that selflessness is his defining character trait, and simultaneously the most admirable and the most terrifying thing about him. it's both his greatest strength and his greatest weakness, which I think is fascinating to explore.

but anyway, so that's also why we never really see anyone thoroughly chewing him out for this behavior either. because the thing is, it is admirable how selfless he is. it's just that there's also a reason why most people are at least a little bit selfish. and that's because too much selflessness will ultimately and inevitably wind up getting you killed. at some point you either have to learn when to put the oxygen mask on yourself first, or else find yourself a loyal group of friends (or classmates) to watch your back, and make sure that mask gets on you when you need it. and maybe help you land the plane too while they're at it.

anyway so that was a lot of rambling, but basically it all boils down to three things:

when Deku berates himself for being useless (for instance at the end of the War arc), he's doing it out of frustration for not being able to push the others out of the way of the metaphorical car. that's the kind of uselessness he can't stand. the sitting-back-and-doing-nothing uselessness.

Kacchan's bullying was terrible, and it might have indeed played a part in Deku's choice of the word "useless" as a way of berating himself in these instances, but he is not the one who gave Deku this mindset of taking himself out of the equation. that's something that was already inherent to Deku from day one. (but that said, Kacchan has a lot of things to apologize to Deku for anyway, so if he wants to add this to the list I certainly won't stop him. he gets mad about Deku's suicidal attitude because it worries him, but that doesn't necessarily mean that he doesn't feel responsible for it. people underestimated his feelings of atonement before 284/285, and I think they're still underestimating him now.)

and lastly, one last important note, which is that Deku's current "saving" mindset isn't wrong, just as Kacchan's "winning" mindset was not wrong either. the lesson to be learned here is NOT that being selfless and wanting to save other people is bad. rather, it's the fact that he's trying to do it alone that's got him all fucked up right now. basically when you think about it, selflessness is really just selfishness on someone else's behalf. which means that in order for Deku to be saved, it isn't necessary for him to change his outlook or his selfless attitude, even if it is pretty crazy lol. rather, all he really needs is a good group of friends who are willing to act selfishly on his behalf in return. protecting each other through mutual selflessness lol. teamwork as self-preservation. hence why the U.A. kids are here now.

anyway so yeah, I think that's everything. sorry this got so long and out of control lol. this is just a very specific nuanced thing that's hard for me to express, but which I feel is very important when it comes to Deku's character. Kacchan didn't unleash Depressed Nomad Deku on the world (or at least not in this respect). but that being said, he and the others will hopefully be the ones to nudge him back on the right course again.

[shepherds-of-haven]

I'm obsessed with this dark!Shepherds AU?? Could you tell us more about it? Or in a head-to-head fight, which Shepherds would win against their evil counterparts or vice versa?

Hi there, good question! I haven’t really given that much thought to the dark!Shepherds AU, but I imagine (if we’re making it very similar to the Justice League scenario) something happens to make the majority of the Shepherds snap, and they turn against the Autarchy and instate a form of governance based solely on power and domination. They think they’re doing what’s right by preventing conflict and protecting the world from demons, just like the Justice Lords felt when they took over the world. That being said...

Dark!Blade: Dark!Blade isn’t all that different from teenage/young adult Blade, who was perfectly comfortable with the idea of assassinating and killing people for his cause, and because he firmly believed it would lead to the greater good. Dark!Blade would be like that, but even colder and more ruthless than his past self. He would rid himself of all personal attachments, such as friends, family, and romance, believing that such feelings made him weak and hesitant, and made himself vulnerable to his enemies in the way that the Autarch was made vulnerable through her sons. 

In a toe-to-toe combat situation, it’s hard to say who would win. Both have razor-sharp killing instincts and battle tactics, but I’m probably going to give it to Dark!Blade, because he would be willing to fight dirty (taking loved ones hostage, threatening kids or bystanders) and Blade would sacrifice himself willingly for others while Dark!Blade wouldn’t. So I’ll give it to him 90% of the time!

Dark!Trouble: I really can’t imagine a dark version of Trouble, not in the whole “bad Justice League” sense. I suppose he already walks a fine line between light and dark as it is; his relentless good, altruism, courage, and compassion make him a hero, but there’s that edge of temper, rage, and darkness (especially in his past--he was a criminal and killer-for-hire too, after all) that colors it as well. Like, now it’s fine for him to beat the everloving shit out of an asshole like Lazu Reen, but that could tip over to someone who’s not so black-and-white bad, too--he could turn that hatred towards an enemy who is more nuanced, like a politician who ultimately serves the people and does good, but who happened to make Trouble an enemy by personally slighting or hurting a friend, something like that. Trouble’s sense of loyalty tends to override his desire for justice in some ways, and I could see him supporting someone like Blade or MC to the end if they framed their endeavors in a way that could still be read as “good”. Like, yeah I had to kill this group of people, but it was for the greater good! And he’d be like “alright, I trust you!” He’s got your back even when the whole world turns against you, until there comes a point when he just can’t stand it anymore--but by then, he probably already did a lot of bad out of love of his friends.

If it were a death match between Dark!Trouble and our Trouble, I’m betting our Trouble would win, purely because Dark!Trouble’s desire to live would be just slightly lessened by the weight of all the deeds he committed. I don’t think he’s truly cut out to be bad, so our Trouble would probably win... 

Truthfully, though, if we’re following the Justice League formula, I could see Trouble being the one dying to trigger the domino effect that leads to the Shepherds turning bad. Like the Flash (I’m pretty sure it was Wally West in JL), in a way, he’s one of the hearts of the Order that bridges them to the civilian population and vice-versa. If he were killed, I could see them falling into the path of darkness (with a lot of other factors involved, too).

Dark!Shery: we already know that Dark!Shery and Shery are one in the same, lol. I don’t think Dark!Shery would be so much like the bad Justice League; I think what would be dark about her would be her indifference, her total passive indifference to their quest for domination “for the greater good” and their thirst for revenge. Dark!Shery is more just personally angry, aggressive, loud, forceful, and selfish, but I don’t see any world where she sets out for power or world domination. If anything, I see Dark!Shery (in that AU) being petty and mean, ripping lollipops out of kids’ hands because she feels like it and not batting an eye at seeing a beggar collapse in the street. 

That’s not to say drunk Dark!Shery is like that, I’m just taking her badness to an extreme in an AU where all of the Shepherds are bad!

In a fight, Dark!Shery would absolutely win, lol. She doesn’t have any better combat abilities than our Shery, but her sheer rage would be terrifying and would lend her crazy strength, lol.

Dark!Tallys: Tallys, too, already walks the edge of the path to darkness a little bit, I think. Obviously she’s chosen the good side, but in a different world where a demon promised her revenge for her fallen family and an opportunity to burn the Autarchy down, I think the younger her would have taken it. In a dark!AU where Trouble was killed or something, I think she would be like, “okay, fuck it” and give in to that doubtful, vengeful side of herself and just go apeshit on the world. She would be one of the people spearheading the plan to take over the world. She’d give lip service and say she was doing it for the greater good, but another part of her would revel in the blood and chaos. It wouldn’t heal the wound in her heart, though, and would only make her even more twisted and angry. 

In a head-to-head first, I’m going to give it to our Tallys 60% of the time. Part of the thing that makes Tallys so effective in battle is her ability to sever herself from her emotions and maintain a cool head; she can detach herself from personal feelings and analyze combat with cold clarity. I feel like dark!Tallys would be easy to taunt into a rage, or she would let her hatred and thirst for blood cloud her mind, so I feel like our Tallys would have the advantage most of the time!

Dark!Riel: I say this in complete seriousness: in a world where Riel decided to turn evil or fall to the dark side, everybody is already fucked. He would absolutely be the most effective and terrifying villain out of the entire cast. He will rip, slash, and burn entire countries with the easy ruthlessness of an accountant making budget cuts. He knows a dozen ways to starve, lay siege to, and lead public campaigns against the enemy. He would be the scariest Autarch the world has ever seen. If you think he’s mean to his enemies like Ebert now, wait until he has no moral code holding him back...

It’s difficult to imagine a battle between Dark!Riel and our Riel, but I’m going to guess the utter dispassionate cruelty and lack of compassion in Dark!Riel would win 90% of the time. Our Riel has a little less edge than Dark!Riel, so for that reason, I think he would lose. And so would the world...

Dark!Chase: I feel like Dark!Chase is very similar to our Chase, just colder, more ruthless, and bloodthirstier. He’d take genuine pleasure in torturing and killing his enemies, and I think he would cut out the flirtatious aspect of his personality in favor of a crueler and more sadistic sense of humor. He would also probably be batshit insane, like, somewhere on the Joker’s level but not obnoxious; in fact, quieter and calmer and deadlier, like you could never really know what he was thinking. People would be afraid to look into his eyes. I think it would take a lot more to push him to that point than the others, though; but once he tipped over that cliff into darkness, there’d be no going back or remorse for him. He’d love to kill his enemies with a kiss and a smile.

In a fight between our Chase and Dark!Chase, I feel like it would be 50/50. Dark!Chase would be more reckless, unpredictable, and have even less of a fear of death than our Chase does; our Chase would have the edge in terms of strategy. So yeah, I think it would be 50/50!

Dark!Red: I can’t even imagine what Dark!Red would be like, lol. I just can’t imagine him being truly evil or ruthless without feeling guilty about it. I guess I could only imagine it if, like, he messed around with some spell and it robbed him of the ability to feel love or empathy?? But even then, I feel like he doesn’t have any inclination to go around conquering the world or hurting people. He mostly just wants to chill and read his books. I feel like he’d be the only one out of the group (besides probably Trouble if he’s not already dead) to be like uhhh guys what’s going on here, this isn’t like us?? He’d probably defect and lead a small underground rebel force with Pan and Neon. OMG and he’d be the one to figure out worldwalking and travel to our Blest to get our Shepherds to fight his because they’d be the only ones to stand a chance at taking down the evil versions of themselves!!! OMG!!! IT ALL FITS WTF. 

Dark!Ayla: I could see Ayla Hulking out and becoming full of rage, but it’s difficult for me to imagine her doing something like supporting the death of innocents or using dirty-handed maneuvers to conquer the land. She’s also among the most independent of the Shepherds, so I feel like she’d be the most vocal of their opposition... it’s realllly hard for me to imagine her casually killing anybody except for scumbags who hurt other people, like murderers and kidnappers. In a war between different political factions or a bid to conquer the world, I just don’t think she has it in her--no matter how angry and aggrieved she was at whatever turned the rest of the others bad.

I think she would either be on the good side, such as supporting Red’s rebels, or vocal enough among the bad guys to have been killed as a dissenter; she might not be around by the time our Shepherds made it to the dark dimension. But if she was, I’m pretty sure our Ayla would win against her 80% of the time. Our Ayla still has the courage of her convictions and the scrappy desire to survive no matter what; dark!Ayla probably wouldn’t. 

Dark!Halek: Also hard for me to imagine Halek turning truly evil; I feel like, if something bad were to happen to turn the rest of the Order bad, Halek would give himself more to grief instead of rage and revenge. He most likely would remove himself from the situation rather than try to take over the world; they would probably have to go hunting for him in the wilderness, kind of like when Luke was a hermit on that blue milk island in Star Wars (spoilers I guess?). I guess dark!Halek would be sort of tired and indifferent Halek, not able to go up against his old allies; our Shepherds might regard him as a coward, but he wouldn’t be evil like the others. 

Our Halek would definitely beat that Halek in a fight, but they’d probably have no reason to fight in the first place!

Dark!Briony: did any of you ever watch the Flashpoint Paradox (another DC movie about the Justice League--well, the Flash--finding out about a really evil parallel universe)? There’s a scene in it where Dark!Wonder Woman--Queen of the Amazonians and waging a war against Aquaman and the Atlanteans--like, beheads Aquaman’s wife Queen Mera and holds her head up to Aquaman like “fuck you”. I won’t link the gif because all of the violence in that movie is pretty gruesome, but that’s how I feel Dark!Briony would initially be. Super strong, running through the enemy army like a knife through paper, annihilating whole forces and landscapes with just her fists, and not giving a shit just how many people she’s killing. I feel like there’s already a tenuous grasp on her emotions in our Briony; beneath the happy-go-lucky, sweet exterior, she feels so much and loves so much that there’s also the ability for her to snap. It wouldn’t take that much (a few more Nathes) to unhinge her and decide to hurt the world as much as it has hurt her. I think she would sort of black out into an all-consuming, heartbroken suicide run where she just decided to do everything in her power to create as much destruction as possible, to somehow soothe the destruction in her heart. 

When that wouldn’t work, I think she would come back to her senses a little and start to slowly realize how fucked up and evil the things she’s doing (and the people around her) have become. It would be slower than someone like Ayla or Red, but gradually I think she would start to nurse a secret doubt in her heart, and if someone like Red was still around, he’d be able to convince her to start working for the good guys in secret, as their mole within the dark!Shepherds. However, I feel like cleverer minds like Blade, Lavinet, Chase and Riel would find her out, and she’d probably be executed for her treason.

In a fight against Dark!Briony and our Briony, I feel like it would depend on what stage of her development she’s at. If it’s still full rage mode, Dark!Briony probably wins like 80-90% of the time!

Dark!Lavinet: I could see Lavinet turning evil, but it’s sort of hard to imagine because she takes her duty to serve the people so seriously--it’s difficult to imagine what would need to happen to make her forget that, or to make her think she knows what’s best for them, even if that means doing bad things. It would already be so easy for her to do that in our world that she’s very conscious of it, so it would take a lot for her to fall into darkness. However, it’s still possible, and I could totally see her agreeing to be installed as a figurehead Autarch in order to maintain order and peace, slowly becoming more callous and ruthless over time. She would totally execute the old guard loyal to the previous Autarch and make their heads roll publicly to instill fear and respect for her reign. She does have that streak of ruthlessness in her; in our world, it’s reserved only for her enemies, but in that world, she’d slowly start to view everyone as her enemy--even past friends!

In a fight between Dark!Lavinet and our Lavinet, I would guess that our Lavinet would win 90% of the time. In that AU, I feel like Dark!Lavinet would let others do the fighting for her, and she would get used to ruling and being behind the front lines; in a way, she’d lose her fighting edge, something our Lavinet still has in spades. So in a direct combat situation, I think our Lavinet would win! In a game of wits and politics, I’m not sure--I would give that one 60-40 in favor of Dark!Lavinet!

[softer-ua]

i can't be the only one who wants izuku to get fucking pissed at his situation, at all might, start questioning what the fuck is going on with OFA.

because if you're going to trust a fifteen year old with something like OFA and bind them to the life of a symbol, you do not get to withhold information. deku was not told he'd be dealing with an enemy like AFO when he got the quirk, nor was he told that basically its whole point was not fighting some vague concept of evil, but fighting a very tangible very dangerous villain. he wasn't told that up until all might, inheriting this power was guaranteed suicide, and even after all might you only have a vague chance of survival. to be offered such a life altering "gift", Izuku should have been warned of everything. from the start. and if not then then from the very moment izuku started seeing vestiges, or at least when AFO resurfaced. WHY IN GOD'S NAME WOULD YOU HIDE ANY, ANY BIT OF INFORMATION ON A QUIRK THAT IMPORTANT?????

no because, if you look at it cynically, All Might took this kid who had nothing and who looked up to him as effective god. He took this kid who he knew had no sense of no self-care or self-preservation. This extremely reckless kid who he saw putting his life at risk three times (sludge v1, hanging on to AM as he jumped, sludge v Katsuki) within 24 hours. He picked this kid who he knew would give everything (because Izuku had "nothing", and therefore nothing to lose) and "gifted" him with a ticking time bomb. Of course Izuku is willing to break himself if it means using OFA to max potential. So much of his self-worth is based on OFA. He's said time and time again he isn't sure if he deserves it, that it's a borrowed power. If you've taken this kid and given him everything practically overnight, of course he'll go to self-destructive lengths to prove himself worthy of it. Who'd want to go back to being nothing after all?

And this is a logical conclusion. Someone like Izuku, someone like All Might probably used to be in his youth and still kind of is, they're perfect to be put on this kind suicide mission. They're a perfect vessel. Sure they're heroic and brave and selfless, but most importantly they're willing to die for the cause. OFA the quirk knows this. Literally two seconds after Katsuki sacrifices himself telling Deku not to do shit alone, Deku renders said sacrifice useless by doing exactly what Katsuki warned him not to😭 And the quirk and vestiges encourage him. They don't give a shit about repercussions and Deku's chronic pain or possible arm paralysis. They just want to beat AFO. You go son you break those arms 🤠

Doesn't it all feel a little bit exploitative?

Look at it like this. A kid is born with no power. This kid wants to be great, but the world says he can't. He meets his hero, and the hero says he can't either. Then the kid acts heroic, but reckless. The hero sees an opening. This kid is good and doesn't care one bit about his well-being? Jackpot! He offers the kid a deal. Great power, an extraordinary gift at surface layer. But one with so many more hidden strings attached that hurt and break and haunt the kid, that he was never warned about or taught how to deal with. But he can always give it to someone else! Can he, really? Can he go back to being nothing? With a personality like his, well nope. And that's why you pick the overly selfless reckless ones. The ones that will feel indebted to you to a ridiculous degree.

Isn't it like dare I say... like a deal with the devil?

As we progress more and more into the lore of AFO and OFA, I can really see why Katsuki's started to view it as a cursed power. And with how wildly different from expectations (at least mine) + far more nuanced the Todofam drama has revealed itself to be compared to what it seemed upon first intro, I'm inclined to believe there's more to the OFA story than clean cut, young bro good guy vs mean big bro oppression.

TL;DR - All Might is the metaphorical devil jr who gave Izuku a passed down deal, and neither he nor broccoli boy read the fine print.

Bakugo’s ghost sent me this ask 💀

Lol but seriously, these are all excellent points and I’ve been sitting on this ask until I had time to answer it because you’re absolutely goddamn right

This shit is explotive af, and I’ve got a suspicion as to why

I don’t think Deku was a random choice, there’s a layer of fate/mystic woven into the bnha world that gets over looked.

Sir had insane fortune telling abilities that were never once wrong about anything except when it came to the 2 OFA users fates. Deku even specifically says he’ll smash any fate in his way, and I think on some level he knows he can because he has a different destiny.

The vestiges break him from Shinsos hold, meaning the can have some level of control over Dekus body. You think AM noticed every time something like that happened? AM didn’t even notice Bakugo internalizing all the blame for his retirement even after watching his mom force him to apologize for it??

“I keep forgetting that your still a child” AM, sir, this is the third time you’ve admitted out loud that you were just gonna let Bakugo suffer his own fate 💀 please stop indicting yourself and at least pretend you care about Bakugo outside his relationship to Deku jfc

Also what are the chances you get nine random holders and none of them turn out to be corrupt or at least too self serving to die for the cause??? Slimmer than the pages bnha is printed on.

There’s something pulling some strings here, and I think it’s the true power of First users quirk.

What would be the point of transferring a quirk if that’s it’s only power?

What would be the point of this quirk being essentially password locked?

What would be the point of this quirk being able to forced on to someone?

There’ wouldn’t be any.

But what if that’s not what the quirk is?

What if the quirk is actually passing something along, and that’s why it’s dna based, it’s the transfer of an integral part of them.

Something that would change a person if forced on them but would possibly eradicate someone if stolen. Something like a souls desire? That could be a dangerous thing to give to someone else especially if it’s something they didn’t want, now they suddenly have to?

Then you give this quirk a strength enhancing quirk?

Now it’s got some juice, how much stronger did it get? Can it sense others with a similar goal, can it make its host gravitate towards those people?

Is the firsts quirk purposely finding exploitable heros, like Nana AM and Deku. All people who were/are willing to give up everything for the cause. How much of the first is in there, how much sentient power does this quirk have?

We know that Nana gave up her family, her child, for the cause. AM never bothered cultivating a family and pushed away Sir and anyone else who is anti him dying, and now we’re seeing Deku do the same.

Deku who had no friends to begin with, a dad who’s out of the picture, and an already slightly strained relationship with his mom?

Is this quirk capable of learning? Does it know that having people you care about slows you down from sacrificing yourself?

Does this quirk compound with the other users goals make the drive stronger each time?

Idk but there’s a glimmer of hope that Deku isn’t doomed to be a glorified meat puppet, and it exists in the form of Kacchan.

No one else had someone so deeply rooted to them, who could fight right along side them. Bakugo is an outlier in this story, almost the exact opposite kind of hero OFA wants, his connection to Deku breaks the cycle.

Deku would never give up on Katsuki, and even if he tried Endeavor will start coughing up ice cubes before Bakugo lets him. He couldn’t leave Deku alone when he was convinced he hated him, there’s no way he’d do it now.

Dekus story will be different from the other users that’s for sure.

[kaizokuou-ni-naru]

The Voyage So Far: Alabasta (Part One)

east blue (1 | 2) || alabasta (1 | 2) || skypiea || water 7 || enies lobby || thriller bark || paramount war (1 | 2) || fishman island || punk hazard || dressrosa (1 | 2) || whole cake island || wano (1 | 2)

(this is a repost, i deleted the first version of it by accident cause im Idiot)

the entry into the grand line is such a great sequence. it feels like such an ending- a triumph after they’ve spent pretty much all of east blue struggling to make it here, and at the same time the beginning of a new adventure, the biggest yet, one that has yet to end a solid two decades later. they all look so happy to have made it here- it makes me smile.

whiskey peak is one of my very favorite short arcs, and i think of the whole first half of the baroque works saga its the one that hits and maintains a tone best (almost certainly because its so short, admittedly, but still). i love the repeated shots of the moon, the reveal that the cactuses are actually covered in graves, the way everything seems far too good to be true at the start and the sense of suspense that creates.

zoro’s extended fight scene in whiskey peak is so great- it’s so creative and so dynamic and the odds are stacked so high against him and yet he’s clearly having so much fun. i do miss this sort of scrappy, improvised fight, cause its largely absent from later one piece but its SO much fun to read- zoro cutting holes in rooftops for people to fall through or shoving ladders to the ground as bounty hunters try to climb them.

i’m a huge fan of fight scenes that use the environment to their fullest, and this is such a perfect example of it. it makes the fight feel a lot more real and exciting, in my opinion.

i’ve never liked zoro and luffy fighting at whiskey peak, its always struck me as frustrating and contrived and kind of out of character for both of them, but i will say that i do like how on the same page they are even when they’re trying to kill each other.

the entire first half of the baroque works saga basically serves to introduce and endear us to vivi so we’ll be invested in the alabasta conflict, and that starts here in whiskey peak, when we get our first glimpse of her actual personality rather than the act she was putting on as miss wednesday, when she bites her lip hard enough to bleed in order not to break down at igaram’s apparent death.

watching robin’s actions with the added context of later one piece is one of the great joys of rereading alabasta. she does a fantastic job of appearing to be crocodile’s most dedicated and capable and dangerous employee while quietly but consistently sabotaging his efforts; saving luffy, sparing pell, sparing igaram, not telling crocodile anything about the strawhats despite meeting them here at the very start of the saga.

little garden has some really cool and striking panels that really put the scale of things on the island, the dinosaurs and giants alike, into perspective, and i love it.

i’m a huge fan of the depth of in-universe lore one piece has. just having little details like this, quotes from books written in-universe, go so far towards making the world feel like a real and wondrous place with mysteries to be solved and details to be uncovered.

i still think sanji is firmly at his best when he’s being a sneaky bastard, and i will never cease to be delighted by how thoroughly he manages to fuck crocodile over with nothing but a phone and some quick thinking not once but twice.

i really like dorry and brogy! for minor characters who’ve only appeared in one relatively minor and inconsequential arc so far, they’re not only very fun and memorable but also leave a hell of an impact on the story, not only in usopp’s new dream of eventually visiting elbaf but also in how they and their crew just keep coming up, first in enies lobby and then even further down the line in dressrosa and whole cake island.

i’m really excited for when we eventually get to reach elbaf, because this plot thread has been so thoroughly and subtly built up over such a long time that i can’t wait to see how it ends.

this is one of my favorite little moments to really drive home how much the strawhats care about each other. they all fell asleep on the floor rather than leave nami alone.

the whole introductory scene to drum is a really good summary of who vivi is as a person and how she contrasts with luffy, and it’s something i’ve written extensively about in a past meta. here ill just settle for saying, vivi is chronically selfless, and always the sort of person to sacrifice herself for others, and these traits which save the strawhats here are the exact same ones that bring her and luffy to blows later on in alabasta.

a good thing to remember when writing characters is that traits aren’t really inherently good or bad, they’re just traits and can have positive or negative consequences depending on the situation, and i think oda is really good at this. vivi’s selflessness, usually a positive thing, becomes reckless self-sacrifice when she’s pushed to her breaking point.

‘kindness begets kindness’ is a pretty consistent theme throughout one piece, though luffy is most often on the other side of it. someone (rebecca, law, tama, etc.) does something for him without really expecting anything in return, and gets paid back a hundred times over. this is a case of the opposite- luffy helps someone offhandedly, and is later saved by their gratitude.

i think luffy wearing his fingers bloody as he climbs the drum rockies is the only time one piece has ever made me cringe back from the page. this sequence is absolutely brutal, and it’s so well-done.

the way luffy decides chopper should be his crewmate is precious, and also reminds me a little of his recruitment of sanji (ironically, given he’s talking to sanji about chopper here). in both cases he sees someone do something good without even really knowing the full extent of their abilities and makes a snap decision that they are awesome and are gonna be part of his crew, no matter what they have to say about it.

i really, really enjoy the way the drum island flashback is set up, with the cutaway right as luffy is about to punch wapol’s lights out. the cut back to that punch finally hitting when the flashback ends is by that point infinitely more satisfying, since you’ve just read chopper’s backstory and therefore have a deep and abiding desire to see wapol eat shit.

hiriluk’s final speech is definitely one of the best and most memorable quotes from one piece, and effectively the crux of one of its biggest themes. one piece is all about inherited will. all of our main cast and a solid percentage of the supporting cast bear the legacy of at least one forebear on their shoulders, from kuina to corazon to otohime. the entire setting of the story is defined by roger’s legacy.

all those people are dead, but they’re sure as hell not forgotten- how can they be, when their legacies are actively shaping the world as a direct result of their lives and influences?

i really, really like the use of flags in one piece. flags are how you declare loyalty or war in equal measure, and flying a pirate flag is a declaration that you’re choosing freedom, come what may, over the laws of the world government. it’s just a really excellent running motif, and a great symbol of what one piece’s definition of piracy means.

this scene is also one of the ones that gets even more extra weight behind it when you know luffy’s full backstory with sabo, which i love.

chopper’s recruitment scene sums up one of the reasons luffy is really great. he just doesn’t care about a lot of things other people would normally take notice of. occasionally that gets him in trouble, but other times it leads to him responding to a situation exactly right, like here. chopper is listing off all his insecurities and reasons he can’t go with the strawhats, and luffy just flat doesn’t care. he wants chopper on his crew and he knows chopper wants to be on his crew, so as far as he’s concerned, there’s no issue at all.

it really is wild that the will of D is named this far back in the story, and has consistently been referenced and built up ever since in very slight ways, through comments by characters like robin and corazon, and yet we still know basically nothing about it.

and a toast to a new crewmate!!

continued in the next post, which covers alabasta arc proper.

[phantaloon-books]

(some) Riordanverse characters (bc I never read TKC) and which Hogwarts House I think they would be in

Warning: this is a long one

Nico: the dude is definitely Gryffindor without a doubt. Like Sorting isn't about some traits and some characteristics, it's about core personality. He may have gone through some of the roughest stuff when he was 10-12, and he was resentful and bitter, but he was brave and bold af throughout everything he did. From learning about his powers, to using them relentlessly despite knowing how exhausted he is afterwards, to his willingness to do whatever is necessary to do what has to be done, because it has to be done. You can't change my mind that he's Gryffindor lol.

Grover: Do I even need to explain why he's Gryffindor? He's a satyr, and even if we're shown strong satyrs, they're not really supposed to be brave fighters. Yet he is one of the strongest, bravest nature spirits we've ever encountered in the Riordanverse, and one of the bravest in general. Like he's so passionate about doing what is good, he's a hero, and the only thing he doesn't match with common Gryffindors is that he's humble and as far from arrogant as could be possible, but it doesn't take his courage away.

Hazel: She's Gryffindor, and core personality-wise, she and Nico are very much alike. They don't ever think about themselves, like Hazel really always does what has to be done, no matter the cost, I mean she literally died preventing Gaea to rise the first time, and she freed Thanatos while believing he would take her back to the Underworld. She's brave af, and she has one of the most strong willpower we've seen in the Riordanverse. She's a passionate hero, and she's the closest thing to a real knight in shining armor.

Lester: I'm gonna place him in Gryffindor because I don't think he fits in in the other houses lmao. That said, as Apollo he's very shitty, but as Lester, he's one of the most courageous people. He's grown so much, he's so willing to actually do stuff now, and sacrifice everything to do what's right, including his life, even if he doesn't know he's gonna survive. Hell, he really went most of TTT with an incredibly painful wound that nearly turned him undead, and he cared more for the future of Camp Jupiter than his own life. Additionally, he's a bit arrogant and cocky, but he truly means well, I love Lester so much.

Clarisse: Look look, all I have to say is that no one could have pulled off less than half the stuff Clarisse has done, she's so Gryffindor it hurts. She's reckless and impulsive, but she's driven by her passion to do good, even if she's the daughter of war, and was bullied by her own father. She's daring, she's bold and she is the hero. She's also arrogant and thinks she can solve everything by herself, something characteristic more of the canon Gryffindors in the books, rather than what the fans have shaped. In fact, she's very much like Gryffindors in the books, who are actually very rude to other houses and think they're the best. Still, at heart, she's in this house.

Alex: I'm in a huge dilemma about where to put them, but I reckon they'd fit pretty fine in Gryffindor. Not only are they daring and courageous, they're proud of who they are, but not in a too full of themselves kind of way, rather in a 'I am who I am, and if you can't accept me, fuck off' kind of way. They can get carried away rather easily though, and very arrogant, thinking they don't need anyone else, when they do in fact need some company. They are one of the kindest and at the same time most ambitious characters we've met, but they are brave beyond understanding in a very personal way, thus, Gryffindor.

Percy: I think it's fair to say he'd be Hufflepuff, because loyalty is literally his fucking fatal flaw, and he is the kindest sweetheart to all those who deserve it, he goes out of his way to help those who need help, whether that be mortals, halfbloods, gods, magical creatures or even his own enemies. He's too good for this world, and even if he's grown a bit bitter, he always looks to fight justly for what is right, and never loses faith in others. That, and the fact that he turned down immortality so that the olympians were more inclusive of minor gods, and their children were treated better. He's just a lovely soul, he's like 80% Hufflepuff so that's enough for me. All that and he's stubborn as hell.

Jason: Hufflepuff. Just, undoubtedly Hufflepuff. Like he seems to be this cold and self centered hero with a superiority complex (bc of all the son of Jupiter stuff) but he's the softest guy there is. Not only is he hardworking, open minded and kind, he appreciates justice but he doesn't seek for revenge or anything, he makes sure people are treated fairly and wants everyone to be accepted. Proof of that is how he continued Percy's job of including more gods, and made sure Nico felt comfortable with who he was. He truly has a heart of gold. (He deserved better btw)

Meg: God I can't decide between Hufflepuff and Gryffindor, but I think I'll go with the former. She's so strong, my baby, she's faced so much wrong, but she's still so kind and understanding of others, especially those who deserve kindness. She puts up such a hard facade, but she's so patient and warm and inclusive. She's brave and strong (as strong as the big three kids, if not stronger), but she's also so loyal to her beliefs despite how she was forced someone else's beliefs for years, so I'll keep her in Hufflepuff. Also, she's stubborn af, and she can be lazy, so that settles it.

Will: I KNOW some people will say Will could be in other houses that are not Hufflepuff, BUT I won't have it any other way. Will is literally the warmest person ever. He is kind and sympathetic and enthusiastic and patient and inclusive. Like Helga Hufflepuff would take one look at him and lose her shit screaming "mine". He's the guy who saw the son of Hades so many people were scared of and immediately grabbed his hand and transfered him some warmth and didn't let him go ahead and get himself killed. He's also the one who everyone loves and likes, so much that Clarisse gets along with him and he can calm her down. He's the ideal Hufflepuff, you can't change my mind.

Magnus: I mean, what else can you expect from the son of the god of summer? He's literally a guy who heals others with warmth. He's also the guy who spent years on the street with the most difficult situations, and accepts every single person the way they are. He's inclusive af, and tolerant of everything. He's the guy who's closest include a deaf elf, a Muslim valkyrie, and a black dwarf, and he's dating a genderfluid person. Yes he's brave, and he's kinda smart, and he's ambitious, BUT none of those qualities overpower his Hufflepuff nature.

Piper: Kinda debated whether Gryffindor or Ravenclaw fits more, but in the end I went with Ravenclaw. Even though she isn't a fighter, she's very very brave, yet her bravery isn't compared to her wits. Like others in the PJOverse, she wins her fights by outsmarting her opponents, but unlike others that's one of her strongest traits. She's witty and creative and a little on the negative side, she really struggled to work in a group rather than by herself. On another note, she's able to keep calm in crazy situations and come up with the craziest most unthinkable solutions (I'm talking borderline ridiculous) that always somehow work. She's not booksmart, but she knows so much about everything, and she's lifesmart you know?

Reyna: Why are some of these so hard? Deeply debating whether she'd be Ravenclaw or Slytherin. In the end I'd go more for Ravenclaw though. Reyna's smart as hell, she's strong and sharp, and she always sees the best way out of a situation. She's witty and observant, being able to keep her cool in battle and lead others in the best direction. She's always looking to grow, and she prefers to do things on her own, but she's a great leader. She has some Slytherin qualities, and she's not learning as learning oriented as others, but she's definitely Ravenclaw.

Sam: Let's face it, Sam has the only active neurons in all of MCGA, she's definitely Ravenclaw. I'm gonna be honest though, I've only read MCGA once, so I can't remember much of their personalities, but Sam is witty and clever, pretty much the only one who can come up with competent plans, while the others rely mostly on luck and whatever plan they can cook up in 5 seconds. She's loyal and true to who she is, and she's extremely courageous and proud of who she is, but her sharpness is what she stands out for me, which is why I put her in Ravenclaw.

Annabeth: I know the obvious option is Ravenclaw, but I genuinely think she's also Slytherin. Yes she is booksmart and wise like Ravenclaw, but her personality matches Slytherins' ambitious, cunning and resourceful nature. She's smart as fuck, but she's calculative, she always finds a way to end up winning, and while she does so by outsmarting her opponents, she wouldn't need to outsmart them if she weren't so competitive. I feel like there's this 40/60 odds on Slytherin rather than Ravenclaw, but it's that small difference that counts. Plus her leadership skills are so powerful that people don't ask, they just know she's the boss.

(Also just picture the sweet and loyal Hufflepuff boy with the strong and cunning Slytherin girl, like it should be as opposite as it is with Poseidon and Athena, but they're so cute)

Leo: Idk what you can expect that's not Slytherin. This boy is the embodiment of ambition and determination. Reminder that not all Slytherins are bad btw (I'm slytherin myself), but like he's life smart and cunning, and he can analyze situations faster than anyone else. He's charismatic and talented, and there's no one to stop him from triumphing. I don't have much to say, I just know he'd be in Slytherin.

Rachel: She's kinda a difficult one, and I struggle between Gryffindor and Slytherin, and tbh I'm still not sure. But I think I'd place her in Slytherin, because even if she's brave af (especially since she was a mortal fighting in a war out of her power), her main trait is her determination. When she's set on something, she gets it done. You can't tell her she can't do something, because she will find a way to do it. She's kind, and she's only a mortal, but she still has incredible power unlike any other. I don't think I can really name it, but I think she'd be put on Slytherin with much difficulty from the Sorting Hat.

Luke: Where else could Luke possibly go? On the meaner side Slytherins have created themselves, Luke would be part of those misled by who preceded them, by those who want to take advantage of their mistreatment (bc let's face it, Slytherins are mistreated by both students and Hogwarts staff), and turn them cold and bitter. Luke is ambitious and manipulative, being manipulated himself, and it comes easily because of his natural charisma and talent. He's very freaking determined and cunning too. He'd fit right into Slytherin, but he'd be viewed as one of the rotten lot.

Thalia: I don't have much to say about this, but Thalia is the girl whose fatal flaw is their desire for power (or smth along those lines), just like most Slytherins. She's ambitious, she's smart, she's truly talented, she stands out between the rest, and she knows it, and she actually kinda likes it.

(Also I put Annabeth, Thalia and Luke in the same house because they're all kinda similar, even if their beliefs and postures are different.

Frank: Ngl I'm having more difficulty with Frank than anyone else. I'm kinda torn between Gryffindor, Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw. I literally can't choose. He'd fit perfectly in any of them lmao, I just can't decide where he'd go. You decide this one yourself.

Please keep in mind, this is my personal opinion and my take on the characters, and not all of you will agree, and that's fine! You can let me know what you think (kindly please, don't come at me), and if you want to, send me an ask on a character you want me to do the same as these (as long as it's not TKC, I'M SORRY I haven't read those) go ahead, don't be shy!

[vashtanazgul]

bucky barnes zodiac

A/N: I’ve been working on this since December and I’ve been too scared to post it, but it’s Bucky’s birthday and I love him, so here we are. I’m new to astrology, so I hope I’ve gotten things right. Header made by the wonderful Sam.

James Buchanan Barnes

Bucky

March 10th, 1917

Pisces, Snake

Birthplace: Shelbyville, Indiana

Birthtime: unknown

Bucky has a very water-heavy chart, with four houses being pisces and two being cancer.

Bucky-boy is very close to my heart for a variety of reasons, but one of them is that we’re both pisces (he a March pisces, me a February pisces).

Pisceans are known for being adaptable, which is shown several times in his limited screentime, both in Civil War and Infinity War/Endgame. Post Winter Soldier, he took off and stayed out of the Avengers sight enough to build somewhat of a life. He had an apartment (which I still don’t know how he paid for), he had a small collection of belongings, and he had his journals. In Infinity War, we see Bucky living a relatively simple life as a farmer; then, while he may not have liked it, he picked up the fight again and worked easily with his new vibrainium arm. Endgame only got him a few minutes of screentime, but from what we saw, he knew Steve’s plan to make Sam, a man who he’d had confrontation with in the past, the new Captain America, and from what we’ve seen of the Falcon and Winter Soldier so far, I think that Steve expected him to be Sam’s wingman.

Pisces are also caring and understanding, not worrying about where you come from but who you are. This is represented in his friendship with Steve. When they were children, the world was not so accepting of Steve being the little sickly fella that he was. Bucky didn’t give a single fuck. Steve was a fighter who expected people to be good and Bucky was drawn to that idealism, which could also be an aspect of him being a pisces. (Authors note: Steve is a cancer, and as I said before I am a pisces like Bucky; my best friend is also a cancer. Interesting.)

Pisces are often artists, and while there’s no MCU evidence of Bucky being artistically inclined, we know Steve was, so that also could have been a draw. And it wouldn’t be a stretch to imagine Steve making Bucky help him with art, and pisces love to help the people they love.

Pisces is also known for self-pitying, dramatic, self-degrading behavior. Bucky says to Steve in Civil War “I don’t know that I’m worth all this,” referring, of course, to Steve splitting the team and becoming a war criminal. Bucky doesn’t say much in the films, but what we see in his face speaks volumes. He’s often sad, desperate, filled with self hatred. He firmly believes he deserves to be punished for the things he’s done, even if he’s not responsible. He remembers every victim of the Winter Soldier and has tears in his eyes as he tells Tony this. The boy has an infinite pit of self loathing. He hates himself more than most of the other Avengers hate themselves.

He’s determined to atone for his sins, however, and a pisces can find energy and motivation in their pits of despair. This is also in line with what we’ve seen for Falcon and the Winter Soldier. I’m betting he’ll have a bit of reckless self-sacrifice, too.

His birthdate of March 10th, 1917 indicates that he’s got keen observational skills and understands people easily, which leads to true, long lasting friendships. Steve Rogers, anyone? This seems to be something that’s picked up in a lot of fanfiction; authors will write him as distant to most, but intensely close to a select few. 

1917 is the year of the snake in Chinese zodiac, and oh boy does this sound like my boy. “You keep most of your feelings to yourself, but when betrayed, you are a fearsome enemy.” I’m thinking specifically of the scene in the FatWS trailer where Bucky has the gun pointed at Zemo, but then drops all the bullets. Dramatic little shit, I love him.

Now let’s break down his name with some numerology. James Buchanan Barnes. I wish I knew why he was named after the gay president, but I’m not sure we’ll ever know. I’ve googled this a lot and can’t find any evidence of anyone at Marvel comics ever explaining it. I’d assume it might be a family name; I have a cousin who has his mothers maiden name as his middle, which is the traditional custom. Modern fans could interpret this as proof that Buckaroo is gay or bi. Either way, he doesn’t seem to use his legal name, favoring Bucky even as an adult. He corrects Zemo without a second thought; “My name is Bucky.” So, Bucky Barnes it is.

2+3+3+2+7+2+1+9+5+5+1

40 

4

Bucky’s number is 4 and let me just quote this whole thing for you because I think it’s spot on.

“Dependable, faithful, stubborn, cautious, organized, loyal, sensible.”

I 100% believe these to be traits Bucky has. We saw all of them in the First Avenger and reason (and hopefully good storytelling) leads me to believe that he’ll show these traits again in FatWS. I guess we’ll find out next week.

Do you agree with my interpretation? Yell in my inbox either way.

Happy birthday, Buck. 

💗💗💗

[bookwormsid1015]

BNHA: Midnight Clouds

A CloudNight Oneshot

The wind combs through his hair gently, and Oboro lifts his head to greet the darkened sky. With the sun long forgotten beyond the horizon, all that remains is the faint chill lingering in the air and the silvery brilliance of the full moon above him. Up here, where the sky is endless, the air is colder, and yet it’s also much easier to breathe. Nothing can touch him so long as he remains on his cloud cruising above the shining city of Musutafu, not even his invisible fears and anxieties.

Today had been a particularly taxing day, with his teacher drilling the importance of quick time reactions in himself and his classmates. Oboro’s head still aches from where a baseball had struck him, and although the cut it left had been reduced to nothing but a small red blotch thanks to the nurse’s efforts, Oboro can still feel the ache of it just above his right eye. It was nothing more than a standard exercise, one where he and his classmates had to utilize their quirks to react to having balls thrown their way, and yet Oboro can’t help but think back on it pensively. While his friends Yamada and Aizawa were able to pass the exercise with little to no issue, Oboro struggled so much more, especially since all he could think about was the wellbeing of his peers.

“It’s good that you think about others before yourself, but that type of thinking is dangerous in hero work,” his teacher had told him sternly after class. “If you want to become a hero, you need to figure out how to balance your will to save others with the need to save yourself. You can’t save anyone if you can’t look out for your own skin.”

Those words struck a chord with Oboro. It resonates in the back of his mind, even after the school day ended and he was allowed to go home. It followed him all throughout his time studying, eating dinner with his family, and even as he played video games with his friends.

In the end, Oboro decided to take a flight, just to take his mind off things.

He’s always been that type of person, Oboro supposes. Ever since he was little, he never had much thought for his own wellbeing and instead focused on others. He remembers being no older than six, getting beaten black and blue on the playground for standing up to a bunch of bullies for harassing a kid he didn’t even know. He remembers playing sports in middle school, and somehow always coming home with a sprained ankle or bloody nose, having taken a ball to the face whenever he’d try to save his teammate. He remembers his online friends laughing at him, people jokingly calling him “meat shield” since he never failed to sacrifice his own avatar for the sake of others. It’s always been like that. Self-sacrifice is second nature to him; it’s part of the reason why he wanted to become a hero. Where else would such recklessness be celebrated?

Oboro utters yet another sigh, and cold air rushes to greet his lungs. He’s happy he’d brought a jacket and a pair of goggles with him, in addition to his cozy plaid blue pajama pants and white tee shirt. As amazing as his night flights are, it can get pretty chilly in the air, especially at night.

Oboro glances down from his cloud, and to his surprise, he finds himself cruising through a familiar neighborhood. Kayama only lives a few blocks away from him-- the close proximity of their homes is part of the reason the two became such close friends-- and Oboro’s azure eyes widen slightly at the figure sitting cross-legged on one of the tiled roofs.

Kayama is sitting on top of the roof of her house, her back facing him as she stares up at the dark sky with her glittering cerulean eyes. Her short black hair falls in spikes around her shoulders, and she’s clad in Tinkerbell pajama pants with bunny slippers and a black tank top. Her thin black glasses sit on the bridge of her perfectly angular nose, and Oboro finds himself entranced by the strange stillness surrounding her. For as long as he’s known the girl, she’s been this bright, glowing ball of energy, flaunting her glory everywhere she goes without a hint of shame. Seeing her so still, so quiet and thoughtful just catches his interest somehow, as if this sight that he’s seeing is akin to a wildlife photographer honing his lens in on a majestic deer. 

Before he knows it, Oboro is directing his cloud down to her.

“Hey, Kayama!” Oboro calls to his senior, and Kayama jolts in surprise at the sound of his voice. She turns around to look up at him, and Oboro flashes her a bright smile as he descends toward her. “I wasn’t expecting to see you out and about this late at night! It’s rare!”

Kayama smiles and tucks a stray raven lock behind her ear. Her hair, Oboro notes distantly, is more of a deep indigo color instead of true black. “It’s not being ‘out and about’ if I’m just chilling on my own roof, Shirakumo,” she replies. “Besides, I could be saying the same thing to you.”

Oboro shrugs and his cloud disappears beneath him with a small pomf. “Fair point. Mind if I chill with you for a bit?” he asks, already walking over to her. The red roof tile is cold beneath his bare feet, but Oboro doesn’t pay it much mind. Kayama is his only center of attention right now.

The older girl utters a pleasant laugh. “Sure, sure. It’s nice having some company every now and again,” she says, and pats the roof tiles beside her. Oboro wastes no time in plopping down right next to her.

For a long moment, neither of them say anything. They just look up at the infinite dark sky above them, and Oboro revels in the beauty it has to offer. The night sky isn’t completely dark, he notices with awe, but instead it’s bright with the stars twinkling distantly and the full glow of the pale full moon shining down on the world like a flashlight. Clouds also drift lazily in the heavens above them, and Oboro traces their shapes in amazement as he notices them fade between grey and white, depending on their proximity to the moon.

The night is full of silvery brilliance, and Oboro breathes it in contentedly.

“Ever notice how expressive the sky is?” Oboro finds himself saying. “Like, I know it’s just oxygen and shit, but I just like to think weather is just the sky showing off it’s different feelings. Like, sunny days are when it’s happy and full of energy, while rainy days are when it's feeling down and wants attention. Nights like this are my favorite, though. It’s sleepy, but at the same time it wants to see how us little people are doing.”

Kayama glances away from the sky and back at the teenage boy beside her. Her lips quirk up into a smile, and Oboro quickly realizes with a grimace just how lame he sounded. “Gah! Ignore me, I dunno why I said that,” Oboro rambles, his face heating up in embarrassment.

Kayama just laughs. “No, no it’s okay. Don’t worry,” she assures him with a gentle pat on his shoulder. “I never thought of it that way. I don’t usually look at the sky and look for some hidden meaning; I just take it for what it is.” She flashes him a glowing smile, and Oboro’s heart seizes up in his chest. “I like that about you, you know that? You have a refreshing perspective on things.”

Oboro chuckles awkwardly. “Do I?” he asks.

Kayama nods her head. “Totally do. It’s nice.”

They sit again in silence, though this time, Oboro’s attention isn’t on the sky above. Instead, he sits there for a moment, just watching her as Kayama turns her attention upward. The silvery brilliance of the moon illuminates her high cheekbones, the curve of her nose, and highlights her full, plump pink lips. It reflects silver in her dark hair, and her blue eyes glimmer under its elegance like twin sapphires. Here, under the moonlight’s kiss, she looks like a goddess, even more so than usual.

It’s common knowledge that Kayama is beautiful. In fact, Oboro is willing to go as far as to say she’s one of-- if not-- the most beautiful girl in UA. There’s just something so wholly compelling about watching Kayama strut her stuff down the school halls, her chest puffed out and chin held high, walking forward without a wink of hesitation nor shame. When she speaks, it grabs his attention, and when she looks at him, his heart forgets to beat. Even Aizawa and Yamada-- who clearly have different romantic tastes-- agree that Kayama is undeniably attractive.

Sometimes, it surprises him that he’s one of her closest friends.

Kayama turns to look at him, and all thoughts in his head die the second her stunning blue eyes fall to his azure ones. “Shirakumo?” she asks, and her smile suddenly turns mischievous. “Why are you looking at me like that? If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re checking me out.”

Steam literally explodes from around his ears (damn his quirk) as his face turns fifty shades of pink. “NO! Nope, no, nuh-uh! I wasn’t doing anything like that! I was… uh…” he turns his brain around in a panic, looking for anything else to say. “I was just thinking about class today! Haha, yeah! Just kinda got lost in thought and stared off into space!”

“Oh?” Oboro isn’t too sure if he’s imagining the hint of disappointment in her voice or not. “Well, how was it? I know Hokiko-sensei is a real hardass. Or he was when I had him last year, anyway.”

“Yeah, he was. He…” Oboro redirects his attention away from the beautiful girl sitting right next to him down to his hands clasped together in his lap. He utters a heavy sigh. “We, uh, well, we did some exercises today about quick time reactions. Basically, he threw shit like baseballs at us, and he assessed how quickly we would react to them. It was supposed to be an easy class, but I got knocked around more times than I would’ve liked.”

“Why?” Kayama asks, her cerulean blue gaze becoming thoughtful and serious.

Oboro shrugs. “We were all getting assessed simultaneously, so while I had to make sure I wasn’t getting pelted by baseballs, I also had to make sure my classmates were doing fine. Ya know, and vice versa,” he explains.

Something clicks together in Kayama’s stare as realization washes over her pale face. “Let me guess: you were so preoccupied by your classmates that you forgot to look out for yourself?” she guesses, and Oboro balks at the accuracy.

“I-is it that obvious?” he whines.

Kayama’s laugh is somehow reassuring. “It’s obvious because I know you, dummy,” she tells him, and lifts a hand to gently flick his forehead. “It’s how we met, after all. Don’t you remember that time when we were in middle school? Some girl was making fun of me and you came over to chase her away? Even though we didn’t even know each other?”

Oboro’s chuckle is shaky, and he can’t help but cringe in hindsight. “I must’ve looked like a white knight or something… Ugh, and they called us boyfriend-girlfriend for the longest time after…” he recalls with a shudder.

Kayama laughs. “Yeah, it was a little weird, but it was also super sweet. It takes guts to help a person out like that, especially if you’d never met them before.”

Oboro turns to her fully, his smile wide and hopeful. “Then you agree with me, right? Me looking out for everyone else isn’t a bad thing?” he says.

Oboro’s confidence wavers at the clear disapproval in the other’s eyes, and Kayama redirects her attention back to the dark heavens above them. “That’s the thing, Shirakumo. Society has conditioned us to believe that certain traits are black or white, when in reality, they’re a moral grey,” she tells him sagely. “At times, anger isn’t always a bad thing, and while envy is an ugly way to feel, it isn’t always derogatory. They can help us cope with situations that are unfair to us or hurtful to others. In some ways, even kindness can be bad. Unhealthy even. It’s always the good people who are taken advantage of.”

Kayama turns to face him, and Oboro’s heart stills as she offers him a gentle yet firm smile. “There is no good or bad when it comes to our feelings and habits. You wanting to help others can be helpful, but if it comes at the cost of your own health, then it’s definitely not something you should be brazen about.”

Oboro sighs deeply and runs a hand through his cloudy hair, his expression crumpling into a grimace. “I know, I know, it’s just… I don’t know,” he mutters. “Ever since I was little, people have told me the true essence of being a hero is putting others’ needs before my own. And it always made sense, you know? Like, I know you’re right, and I know that my habits aren’t healthy, but…” Oboro utters a resigned sigh. “I don’t know what else to do.”

Kayama scoots closer to him and places a gentle hand on his shoulder. “You’re too down on yourself, you know that? I know you, Shirakumo, and I know that you have all the tools you need to become an amazing hero. The only one who doesn’t see it is you,” she tells him, and adds with a small laugh, “Besides, Aizawa and Yamada look up to you, you know? You don’t know it, but you’ve been a really good influence on them. Especially Aizawa.”

Shirakumo lifts his head and turns to face her, his azure eyes wide with disbelief. “Damn, Kayama, how do you do it?” he asks, his words taking the other aback. “You always seem so confident and self assured. When you’re serious, you can spew some amazing wisdom, while I…” Oboro looks away with a sigh. “I’m all about the fake stuff. I’m not even confident most of the time, I just… force myself to act and say things I don’t even completely agree in. It makes me feel like such a fraud.”

Kayama’s smile doesn’t waver in the slightest. “What can I say? Not all of us are perfect, besides…” the light in her eyes dims a bit. “If you really think I was always this way, then maybe you are dumb.”

Oboro scoffs, though his lips betray a smile. “Gee, thanks,” he says wryly, causing the other girl to laugh.

Kayama stands up and stretches her arms over her head. Shirakumo pointedly turns his attention away as her tank top lifts just a bit, exposing a glimpse of her toned stomach. “All this talk about insecurity is kinda draining. Come on, ” Kayama extends a hand out to him, “my mom made cookies earlier. There should be enough left over for you and me to split.”

Shirakumo stares at her hand in awe, temporarily taken aback. Usually, Oboro is the type of guy to keep his insecurities and fears hidden. He wants people to know he’s reliable and helpful, and he wants to be this pillar of reassurance for those around him. And yet, whenever he’s around this girl, he just feels more… vulnerable. Like he can finally look at these hidden parts of himself-- parts that he’s disgusted with-- and somehow feel just a little more content with them. Looking at Kayama now, Oboro can’t help but realize just how amazing she is. Not only is she beautiful and smart, but she’s confident and reliable; she genuinely cares about the people around her, and while her mannerisms are a little weird, creepy even, it also makes her so much more… her.

And Oboro wouldn’t change her for the world.

“I love you,” the words stand at the edge of his tongue, the temptation to risk it all becoming more and more overwhelming by the second. “You make me want to be better. You inspire me. I want to see you become an amazing hero, and I want to be beside you when you finally achieve your dreams. I love you.”

But he doesn’t.

Instead, Oboro reaches up and takes her hand. “Your mom makes the best cookies,” he says with a smile. “My mom has been asking for her chocolate macadamia nut recipe, by the way. Think she’ll be willing to share her secrets with me?”

Kayama laughs as she pulls him to his feet. Although he’s several inches taller than her, she doesn’t seem bothered at all having to smile up at him. “Maybe, maybe not. No promises, though,” she says. Kayama turns around and clambers down to the edge of the tiled roof, where she steps onto her window sill. She smiles back at him. “Come on! I managed to get my hands on one of Bon Jovi’s limited edition albums, the other day, and I’ve been waiting to listen to it with you!”

Oboro laughs as he follows her lead down to her window. “Immaculate taste as ever, eh, Kayama?”

Kayama’s giggles are music to his ears, “What can I say? It’s a living.”

[theloyaltyofthewolves]

stray kids

one of you asked me if i could talk about why i love stray kids on my old blog. i know it’s about three months too late, but if ur still out there anon, this one’s for you.

it’s been five years since i stumbled into the world of kpop. i started listening in 2015. which is crazy. you know how long ago five years was? bts hadn’t even won an award in 2015. b*g b*ng was still together in 2015. twice and ikon won rookie of the year, nct hadn’t debuted, exo had just begun their rise to fame. 

it’s been a fun five years. i have loved many different groups. i have watched them sprout, grow, blossom, followed several of them to stardom. some of them, i’ve broken up with. many of them, i still check in with from time to time. i’ve watched several of them disband or go into hiding. i still listen to their music, i still watch their old fancams. 

this is all to say that stray kids are different. they always have been and i knew that right away. i was sitting in my dorm room, five thirty am, headphones on while my roommate slept, watching the 2018 MAMA awards. you know the performance. we all know the performance. two years later, and it’s still their best performance. not just because they won rookie of the year, not just because of bluesung. but because they threw absolutely everything they could into it. sure, maybe the show was a little sloppy. maybe there were mistakes, maybe they were a little bit awkward, maybe the vocals weren’t perfect, maybe they couldn’t fill the whole stage. but they were giving it everything they had. and the thing abt live streams, live performances, is that shit like that shows. you can dose up music videos with as many special effects as you like. you can edit the official recordings, slip in some autotune, crop some angles, blur some skin as much as you want. but you cannot fake desperation. you can’t fake passion. 

to this day, i have never seen a performance like that. not from a rookie group, not from a veteran. i didn’t even know who the hell they were, where the hell they had come from, who they belonged to, what their names were, but i could feel their desperation across six thousand miles of ocean. in an industry overflowing with glittering diamonds, these kids were broken shards of obsidian. they were raw. they were unpolished. they were sharp. they had cut themselves open for this performance, they were bleeding all over the stage. 

i will always have a weak spot for underdogs. for the kids who fight tooth and nail just to be there, who come out with scraped knees and bruised knuckles. the kids who force themselves into places they don’t fit into, stages too clean for them. the kids who make a scene just by showing up. who come in hot, burning, running their mouths. talking way bigger than they are, way bigger than they have any right to be. the reckless hubris of youth, the kind that turns heads. fucking look at us. fucking pay attention. we fought to be here, we survived, we’re staying.

that is what stray kids is. an experiment, a test. eight wolves just coming into their own. they’re messy and they’re ragged and they’re scrappy and they’re real. they can’t be handled the way that other groups have been built to be, they can’t be air-brushed into perfection. the thing about a company ceding control the way it has is that there is no reclaiming it. there’s no picking up the end of the leash once it’s been dropped. stray kids are self-made. they built themselves with their bare hands. it’s their blood, their sweat, their sacrifices. their music, their dream, their voice, their sleepless nights and empty bank accounts. their fire, their heart, their honest-to-god love. yes, they have been confined within the limits of jyp and yes, they are still chained to the performative nature of being an idol. but they have pulled the boundaries far further than any group that has come before them. their own terms, their own music, their own limits. stray kids are the new standard. 

and then there are the members themselves. i could spend another four thousand words talking about why i love them individually. but stray kids are more than the sum of their parts. they always have been.

all idol groups love each other. i cannot imagine there is any other way that they survive. the pressure, the expectations, the fame, the stress, the exhaustion, the bullshit, the objectification, the subjugation. being worked to the bone, run like a racehorse, treated like a commodity instead of a human being. it’s a version of trauma bonding, it really is. your teammates become the only people who understand what you are going through, who can relate to you, share your burden. they are also often the only ones looking after each other. keeping each other safe, keeping each other healthy. friends, if not family. allies, if not friends. teammates rely on each other, that is universal.  

but stray kids’ bond runs deeper than that.

we like to talk like it was fate that they found each other, like they stumbled into one another and it all just fell together and everyone was happy and the river ran smooth and the blood was sweet like honey. we like that, we think there’s something holy in it because it rings like destiny and we like that. soulmates, meant-to-be’s. 

that’s not what they are. i wish i could get it stapled across my blog in big bold letters. it’s not a coincidence. it’s not a miracle. it’s not an accident. stray kids are not an act of fate, they are an act of love and that is what makes them so fucking special. 

it’s not luck that got them this close. it’s not destiny. stray kids put in the time. they put in the effort. they looked at each other and they decided this isn’t going to be an accident. love takes work. love takes sacrifice. love takes patience and selflessness and respect and effort. it’s not one and done, you don’t just fall in love and everything falls into place. choosing to love someone, committing yourself to someone, devoting yourself to someone – never mind seven other people – is a big fucking deal. it has to be done consciously. it has to be done on purpose. you have to look inside of yourself and say this is more important. these people are more important. i will put them first over everything.

it’s the millionth time, but i’ll say it once more for the people in the back: stray kids practice active love. love as an action, love as a verb, love as an act of defiance. on purpose, on purpose. i’m going to love you on purpose. i’m going to take you for everything you are, all your flaws and all your strengths, all your dreams and all your fears, all the stones and scars and ghosts that you carry. i’m going to love you for all of it. the good and the bad. 

losing teammates is a bitter and terrible loss. it must haunt them restlessly, follow in their footsteps and shadow their shoulders, whispers in their ears at every turn. wounds like that don’t heal right on their own, so they have stitched themselves up with parts of each other. it’s why they never stray too far, are never more than an arm’s length from each other’s sides. it’s why chan doesn’t let the kids out of his sight, why they are always so on-edge when they are not eight, why every time one of their teammates is returned to them, he is subjected to a full check-up by seven worried faces. they all have it, that obsessive tic. they reassure with their hands, with physical touch. tangible. it’s not enough to see, they have to feel each other under their fingers. reassure that we are here, we are together, we are eight and we are still alive. they are terrified to lose one another so they bind themselves tighter, lean on each other harder, love fiercer and bloodier.

it’s an act of resistance, love like that. screaming into the endless void of hate and emptiness, loneliness and despair, failure, defeat, grief. even after all this time. all the heartbreak and the devastation, everything they’ve lost, all the tragedy. to get back up, to put on a brave face, to take a stand with your chin up and your arms outstretched: these are my people. my heart and my soul, my blood and my bones. you cannot take them from me, you will not take them from me, i will cherish them to my death, i will protect them to my death, i will love them to my death. practicing active love because they want to be together, because they will be together, because they are better when they are together--that’s brave. that is bravery. that is an act of rebellion and it is the most human thing one could do and it is the reason i love them more than anything. because they love each other on purpose, and because somehow in this world of chaos and violence and hatred and fear, that is enough.

you kiss me with your mouth wide open like you're not afraid of swallowing poison. i taste the good and the bad in you and want them both. we call this bravery. - anita ofokansi

[lloftvlly]

MysMe Characters in a Zombie Apocalypse Headcanons

Here I go again. I like zombie moves/shows and mysme so I figured I wanna combine them. 

All the headcanons under the cut because this became long! 

Yoosung

Scared boy ™

Yet shows strength when he has to protect you

Cries as he runs away from zombies

Also cries and/or gags when he sees the gory stuff

Builds contraptions to keep zombies out of your camp / hide-out

Which never rly work... but it’s the thought that counts

Always compares every situation to video games he played 

And can sometimes even come up with useful plans due to his experience with post apocalypse setting video games

But whines a lot about how “this is way harder than it looked like in xx game”

Ready to die for you and thus ends up doing unnecessary dangerous stuff, so the group has to often stop him to do the dumb thing.

“I’m not a child anymore I WANT to protect MC TOO!”

Weapon of choice: a sword like his favorite video game character even if he’s clumsy in using it. So he ends up reaching for a simple gun when he finds himself in a dire situation. 

Knows recipes of post apocalypse type foods and cooks for the group.

If you’re bitten by a zombie he falls into complete denial and firmly believes you won’t turn because he can’t accept you leaving him like that. 

Jaehee

You didn’t expect it but she suddenly turns into a very capable apocalypse warrior

When she doesn’t kick ass, she researches about the outbreak and comes up with theories to potentially one day find a cure

Keeps the group organized even in chaotic times

Always able to come up with plans when the group finds itself in dangerous situations

Call herself your sidekick but it feels more like you’re her sidekick

Doesn’t trust any new people at all, if someone wants to join your group they have to get through Jaehee first (and most times don’t manage to do that.) 

Scavengers from outside groups always underestimate her and then end up getting their ass kicked. 

Keeps an organized list of how many zombies and how many people (in self defense) she has killed. She feels guilty for the people side of the list, even if it was in self defense every time. 

Makes you feel the most safe when you are on errand runs together.

She sees and hears EVERYTHING so no zombies or people can approach you unnoticed. She’s just always really alert.

Weapon of choice: her own martial arts skills and if necessary uses a machete to assist her.

Always tired, yet always on top of her game when the situation requires it. 

If you’re bitten she wants to make the last moments for you as comfortable as humanly possible, while she closely stays by your side. She’ll act tough to not show her own pain and will not show you her tears because she wants you to see her strong in your last moments to make you feel at peace with leaving her behind. 

Jumin

Leader of the group even though he never signed up for this

The group just suddenly decided he would be the most level headed for that position and for Jumin it would be too much trouble to decline

Negotiates with other groups you meet on the road and often gets some good trades for supplies done

Surprisingly is a good fighter when he has to put down a zombie or two

Really knows how to shoot a gun and land a head shot after the other for some reason ( he probably had private shooting classes before the apocalypse for fun) 

Sighs yet composed when blood gets on his fresh white shirt

Where does he get all these clean white shirts from? 

Way too clean for someone who lives in a world that ended.

If he has to kill other people who seem to be a danger to your group he will do so without hesitation and zero regret, they had it coming. 

Weapon of choice: a simple yet powerful handgun

Sometimes makes questionable choices and tries to control the group too much to keep track of everyone. 

He means it well for everyone’s safety but it can be too much.

But when you tell him he does things wrong he gets soft and is willing to listen to you when you advice him on doing things differently.

This is making you somewhat of the right hand of the leader. 

If you’re bitten he gets too emotional about it to asses the situation and you end up being the one comforting him because he loses his fucking mind. 

Zen

Looks bomb even after 5 days on the road without a shower

Still somehow manages to hold a somewhat proper meal plan

And gets enough sleep cos “his skin needs it”

Protects you always! And never lets you out of sight if he can avoid it.

Gets way too comfortable with shady strangers you meet on the road

But if someone of these strangers becomes a danger to you, doesn’t think twice before cutting their throat

On supply runs he brings back shampoo, beer and magazines instead of things like canned food and water

He avoids fighting whenever he can to keep his hands clean, but if he has to do it, he’s very capable and smooth

Weapon of choice: a katana 

Looks like a beautiful warrior when he fights

His long hair gets in the way sometimes and can cause zombies grabbing at it but he WON’T cut it EVER. Sacrifices are to be made in the name of beauty. 

The members of your group all somehow rely on Zen for emotional support in rough times because he knows just the things to say to make everyone feel better and never stops being positive even after the world was literally ending.  

Nothing seen of this positivity however, when it’s about Jumin. 

Yes, he is not okay with Jumin being the leader but also doesn’t do anything about it, even if it causes him to nag sometimes.

If you’re bitten he will blame himself forever for not protecting you better and go on a rampage to kill every zombie within a 10 mile radius to let out his frustration. One of them hurt you, so all of them must die. 

Seven

Runner of the group, meaning he does most of the supply runs, goes out to clear roads and check locations and safety thereof 

Somehow became always that guy of the group everyone looks at when they discuss about needing a member to do something that’s ridiculously reckless. Because “its Seven, he’ll manage.”

And will do everything the group asks from him, because what does he have to lose?

Most reckless of the bunch but also luckiest of the bunch, always gets away completely unharmed no matter what dumb risky thing he does. 

Still you worry about him a lot for his lack of self-preservation, but don’t tell him you do or he’ll get mad at you. 

Boy knows all the little secret pathways, hideouts and escape routes.

Also comes up with clever inventions he can make out of random junk he finds. It really helps out the group

Zombie puns all day everyday “ Zombodie had to do it.”  “That’s a no-brainer” “You undead all your good work” “Don’t outbreak my heart.” 

Tries to avoid killing or fighting off zombies to save his energy for other things. He’s more into being stealthy when he has to get shit done. 

But when he has to, he will be pretty good in getting rid of a handful zombies.. :

Weapon of choice: a wooden baseball bat with nails sticking out of it.

He likes it, it makes him look badass

Tries hard to avoid getting emotionally attached to you or anyone in the group because you all could die at any moment and there’s no point.

But slips into caring too much about you and the group anyway 

If you’re bitten he will have an emotional break first but then quickly start to think of ways to save you, no matter how. And if he has to chop off the infected body part to see if it works he will do so. 

Saeran [ Unknown ]

Not part of your group but always knows where you all are and what you are doing.

Instead belongs to this other surviving group that ordered him to keep an eye on yours.

Comes out of nowhere when you’re in a situation where you can’t defend yourself from a group of zombies to save your ass.

But will be gone again before you can even thank him. He only did it because he needs you alive anyway.

At least that’s what he tells himself. Although he starts caring for you for some reason. 

And really wants to bring you back to join his own group instead of sticking with the RFA.

You get very interested in this masked stranger but your questions remain unanswered because he keeps his distance to continue to watch from afar. 

Casually uses zombie blood, skin and guts to camouflage himself when he has to walk through herds of them. 

He is a skilled assassin who was trained to get the job done.

Weapon of choice: a simple hand knife in close range and a full-on automatic rifle for when it’s about killing many zombies at once.

Will use either of the weapons not only on zombies but on other humans, with the same lack of hesitation, if they piss him off.

Biggest kill count of them all. 

If you’re bitten he won’t even think twice before grabbing a sharp tool to chop off your infected body part if it’s in a location that can be removed. If it’s not he might wait for you to turn and keep you as a zombie pet. 

V

The original leader of the group who mysteriously vanished about 10 days into the outbreak.

It’s because he’s been infiltrating the other mysterious group to gain information on them just to find out his ex is the leader of this other group.

Thus is stuck between two groups and because of that became a solo-surviver without really a group to belong to.

Elegant fighter. Will knock down 5 zombies gracefully without a single drop of sweat.

Sometimes picks up helpless stranded survivors on the streets and allows them to travel with him and protect them until he finds them a save community to join.

Weapon of choice: a makeshift wooden spear with a blunt end for humans and a pointy end for zombies.

Pacifist who will never kill another human, even if they tried to kill him first.

But never hesitates even a second before killing a zombie.

Probably saved your ass from the distance a few times without you knowing.

Leaves water and food on your hideout doorstep in secret when he knows your group is low on supplies because he never stops taking care of all of you from the shadows. 

If you’re bitten he will be by your side and do everything in his power to make your last moments comfortable. Unable to end your pain while you’re still alive and yourself, he will wait for you to turn before he can eventually kill you. 

Rika

Leader of this other group and still goes by the name savior.

Her group has a questionable pyramid scheme: They are basically a apocalyptic cult who believes that this end of the world is a sign for them to build their new society.

Somehow mastered to build the most powerful survival group in a safe locations with strong walls.

Is interested to bring in people of your group if they are useful to her.

Especially interested in Seven, since he got the brains she could need to further build up her own little society behind her walls.

And will sacrifice everything for her cause, especially the lives of people working for her.

Uses force to make people stay and work for her. Will kill her own “believers” and turn them into zombies if they astray from the beliefs she forced onto them, then have them in cages within their walls to show them off to the other members her community as an example of what happens when you go against the grain. 

Especially uses Saeran as her most active tool in whatever mission she plans.  

Weapon of choice: Her charm and manipulation tactics.  

Legit thinks life after the outbreak is better than before and the apocalypse is somehow a gateway to paradise. 

If you get bitten she locks you up to see the process of a human turning as a sort of experiment. 

[thesummerstorms]

Rev Recaps: Hard Contact (Chapter 2)

CW: None except some mentions of series-typical past violence.  LONG ASS POST beneath the cut.

TL;DR Recap:  Darman meets Jedi General Arligan Zey, Jedi Commander Bardan Jusik, and his new squad members. This blogger loves Zey entirely too much. The gurlanin are introduced and exposition happens. Jinart is vague. 

So this is the chapter where we first meet Zey, who is honestly one of my favorite characters, and Jusik... who is not. That said, Jusik is actually pretty likeable in this first introduction, probably because he’s not on screen long enough to be vaguely perfect and lecture people.

We actually hear from Zey before we see him. The quote itself is before he technically takes command of the RCs (they’re still in stasis) but is otherwise pretty standard fare for a Traviss novel. The one thing that got me to highlight it is that the attribution lists Zey not as a General but as “Jedi Master Arligan Zey, intelligence officer.” Raise your hand if you really want to know what Zey was doing before the war. 🙋‍♀️

Anyway, we’re back in Darman’s point of view again. The commandos are being briefed for their mission in a glorified fridge as “Fleet support”. 

Yeah, you kind of understand why the Nulls flipped out about going into stasis if not waking up because you were reconditioned in your sleep is apparently on the table. (I still have questions about how the Kaminoans could AFFORD to deliberately kill as many soldiers as this book seems to imply, but I’ll save it for later.)

I don’t know why this description of Zey tickles me so much, but I enjoy it. Zey, sit down and stop pacing, you’re making the commandos nervous. Also, he was probably actually better suited to taking Etain as a Padawan than people thought...

Anyway, Darman watches Zey’s Gurlanin contact for a while and then.Atin shows up and everyone is very focused on his scarring (which is still fresh at this point.) We know in retrospect that he got the scar when Vau cut him open, but the hell if I know how that timeline works out. It’s three months post Geonosis, the squad has been chilled down and then just woke up on Ord Mantell, and apparently Vau stuck his nose in there somewhere before this meeting.

Zey: “Padawan, stop. You’re embarrassing me.”  I don’t know, I just really love Zey, okay? But also, again, it’s been three months since war broke out, but for all that Darman’s thrown off by the terms of address, Zey feels fairly... comfortable/practiced at this?

Zey gives all the needed exposition on Qiilura, which I never spell right on the first try, and on Ghez Hokan. 

I think “Death Squad” is meant to be “Death Watch” here, especially given Hokan’s characterization and the mention  of being so violent that it’s a surprise this other violent group kicked him out. If it was clarified somewhere else that something else was meant, I’ll accept it, but in the mean time I just need everyone to reflect on how embarrassing and cruel you have to be to be kicked out of Death Watch. Because Hokan lives up to it,

I... I am pretty sure the commandos speak Basic. Just saying. Jusik is awkward as fuck, so I choose to willfully misinterpret this as “Jusik has another emotional outburst which leads Zey to have to pause in embarrassment, again. Dar misinterprets this as emphasis.” Darman already has some really weird, Kaminoan-taught ideas about Jedi so-

Zey briefs them about the military base, which Etain knows about on planet, and also the very specific anti-clone bioweapon being developed there, which she does not, and lets them know Fulier has been out of contact for “some weeks”. (Etain also doesn’t know there IS a war or a clone army, and the weird ass timeline here is a whole rabbit hole so I’m just gonna move on.)

We get to one of my favorite moments in the chapter:

“The situation is Nemoidians.” *is confused when Omega does not immediately understand his pithy comment* Zey also stares at Niner expecting discussion, which Darman finally provides because he’s worried Zey will feel embarrassed otherwise. Nemodian stereotypes baked into the setting aside, it’s a pretty great little piece of characterization.

Seriously, what the hell did Zey and Jusik DO before the war???

I don’t know, again, I just like the characterization here. Anyway, the commandos talk shop a bit, Dar notes that Atin’s wound is still “weeping” and has to hurt “like fire”. :( 

“Darman was embarrassed for him”. Dar then does some tech talk which leads Niner to decide he’s the demolitions guy. He notes that he “was happy to have the demolitions role”. Which I guess makes sense since commandos are cross trained for all the potential roles, but I wonder if he did that with Theta Squad too.

Okay, but again, I have so many questions about back story here. Jusik is a maverick or intended to be one from the get go, but ... why is he so protective of Fulier’s reputation as to become defensive when the Gurlanin starts talking shit? Is it just because he sees Fulier from afar as a kind of kindred spirit? Or have he and Etain and Fulier and Zey run missions before? 

Jusik’s line to Etain in Triple Zero about “I know you well enough now” [to sense her pregnancy] makes me think they probably weren’t close friends, and Zey’s reunion with Etain at the end of the book is “remarkably formal” from Dar’s pov, including calling each other “Master” and “Padawan”, not by names. But she also doesn’t ask who he is, so it’s possible they have worked together, I guess?

Anyway, Jusik breaks the news that they only have eight hours until the hit Qiilura. I’m resisting the urge to check my copy of Essential Atlas on this one, because KT has a history of not thinking about hyperspace travel times and that prior knowledge bugs me. Then we cut to Etain, who is hiding in Birhan’s barn, being vagued at by Jinart.

I’m super biased of course, but I’m interested in Etain’s relationship with Kast Fulier, so this passage just feels like a weirdly... dispassionate description to me, coming from Etain, Kast’s likely orphaned Padawan, who is alone and afraid with out him, and as we’ll later find out regards Kast as the “only person who’d shown her kindness” other than Darman. (Paraphrasing).

From a Watsonian perspective, you can probably make the argument that Etain is, if not in shock, still dealing with a lot of mental trauma and stress in a short time, and responding accordingly. But it bugs me a little that Etain’s thoughts about this person who would have been her whole lifeline in the order are so neutral to even slightly negative, especially when you compare it to Jusik’s slight line the chapter before. 

And  especially when you consider that these faults are also Etain’s exact faults that are also sometimes her strengths. Reckless compassion, a bit of self-righteousness, impatience, and an inability to walk away when she could do something about an injustice.

And especially when you compare it to Niner (and Dar and Fi)’s never ending praise and affection for and memories of Kal Skirata later in the book. And you can’t even make the case that it was purposeful/Etain’s relationship is more strained than theirs, because again, it gets so little development/mention (plus paired with the “kindness” comment.)

You know I’m biased if you’ve been on this blog long at all, but it bugs me.

Again, this is just to say... people give Etain a lot of shit but “ ...or get a data transmission out in her stead. She still had a mission to complete, if only to justify Master Fulier’s sacrifice.”

I still don’t 100% understand how this scene actually played out, practically speaking, especially as everyone addresses Kast Fulier as a Jedi MASTER, not even a Knight with the courtesy title of Master, but a Master in his own right.

We get some more info about Hokan, which still tracks with what you’d expect of a Death Watch drop out, and also again shows that Etain was pretty fucking exhausted/traumatized before Omega even gets there.

Again, people give her some shit about her break down or moments of inner turmoil at various places in the book, but if she’s been there since before the war was declared, she’s been dealing with all of this, largely alone, for at least 3 months now. And this in addition to the attempted assault last chapter.

Anyway, the chapter ends with Jinart vaguing, but it’s just ~foreshadowing~ so it’s not super important to anything.

My big take aways for this chapter are that I love Zey and I really need a prequel to this novel, to be honest. 

[thataveragewriter]

Can you please do Zombieman head canons if he had disciple who’s super shy, sweet, and soft spoken a totally cant fight for shit who only has the power to create bubble shields and is just scared of fucking everything XD (I think it’d be super cute if he was so protective of them!) your choice if you want to make it platonic or not!

A/N; aaaaah its been a loong while! I love this guy man, especially since i finally decided to read the manga. I hope ya like it!!

Zombieman Protective head cannons – Platonic & Romantic

Platonic

Being the disciple of one of the most renowned S-Class heroes, you were quite the contrary to your master. Unlike Zombieman, you were the soft-spoken, shy assistant that followed him around in every death-defying mission. Despite your small stature and timid nature, you were determined to be your master’s shield, to protect his life even if it meant your life would be at risk.

Zombieman however… didn’t agree with this sentiment of yours. After all, he agreed to take you under his wing, which meant he’d take care of you. The nihilistic male was skeptical at first when he heard of your appeal of becoming his disciple. You just didn’t seem to be the fighter sort of hero nor did you give off any heroic vibes.

You quickly proved him wrong by saving his undead ass him from getting crushed by a demon leveled threat. It was purely on impulse which prompted you to move, forgetting that he was called ‘Zombie’ for a reason you rushed to save him from certain death.

After that incident, Zombieman saw you in a new light. Despite your lack of combat skills, your sheer determination to save people in the sacrifice of your own life was enough to call you a worthy hero.

On the battlefield, Zombieman swore he’d keep you safe. He’d make sure you don’t do anything reckless like last time, he’s supposed to keep you safe not have you as his meat shield. He’d lightly scold you for not listening to him but your natural instinct made it hard not to go and protect him. Despite your fear of literally everything bad.

“[Name]! I told you to get back, I can handle it!” He said as a barrier of bubble formed in front of him, protecting him from the critical hit.

“I’m sorry but this is the only time I won’t follow your orders!” you yell back as you form another layer of reinforced bubbles to cover both of your sides.

Zombieman smirked at your uncharacteristically disobedience. “You better cover me then, I’m going for the kill”

From this point on, Zombieman considered you an equal. Someone he could rely on, more than the other heroes. If anyone were to pick on you or mock you, he’d come to the rescue.

As you were in a lower class than your mentor, you had been the subject of ridicule by some of the other ‘heroes’. Being the disciple of an S-class hero meant, you followed Zombieman in every one of those tedious S-class meetings. It was always uncomfortable to hear the comments from the other heroes and you would cower behind Zombieman whilst nervously clutch onto his coat.

He knew tatsumaki would not appreciate someone of lower class to be in those meetings, as she deems them inept, yet Zombieman couldn’t help but snap when she made a direct comment about you.

“This is a meeting for S-class heroes. Not some sort of social event for low classed heroes, anyone with a sense of self-worth would know not to come in” Her harsh words caused you to fall in a pit of anxiety and glue your eyes to your feet. Your unease was not relieved as Zombieman stayed quiet. Her rambling went on until he snapped.

“If you’re going to preach about self-worth and respect, maybe you should learn to take your own damn advice” The usually calm nihilist, snapped with his brows furrowed in annoyance.

He knew you were deeply uncomfortable being around the other heroes but he also eased your worries with a smile and a ruffle of your hair and reassuring words. You were truly lucky you had a mentor like Zombieman.

Romantic

Zombieman would never have imagined himself falling for anyone. Until you approached him with a certain goal in mind.

The male had noticed you on a few occasions but nothing came of it. You however, admired the nonchalant S-Class hero for his calm composure in the battlefield and from afar. With little confidence you had requested being the hero’s disciple, to teach you his ways of combat and such.

Contrary to his outward composure, he couldn’t logically think of the risks of you being his student, yet his heart seemed to make the decision of accepting you. You were understandably ecstatic to be working with your hero.

There were times where Zombieman would zone out and watch you evacuate citizens whilst he was supposed to fight the monsters. He admired the gentleness you had toward the lost children and helped the elderly get to a safe refuge, Zombieman would often find himself smiling as he watched you work. You were an honourable hero in his mind.

But in this line of work, there are risk that always follows. When you were caught in between two tiger levelled monsters whilst protecting a child, you knew this was an inevitable doom you couldn’t escape.

When you were admitted to the hospital, Zombieman blamed himself for leaving you alone. He was aware of your lack of combat skills and swore he’d keep you safe yet he couldn’t.

He sat there by your side, softly caressing your unconscious hand. The usually calm male felt his world crumble slowly as you laid there in a comatose state. Zombieman had never felt his heart clench and hurt as much as it did in that moment. When he had found you, he could feel his heart physically stop beating. You were in a bloodied state with several definite fractures.

“[Name], Please forgive me. If I…If I had been there in time…” He felt your hand curl around his which startled the poor guy.

“I don’t blame you Z. If you hadn’t come when you did…I wouldn’t be here with you right now” you said with a soft smile, your weak hand giving him a soft squeeze. You could make out small tears by the corners of his eyes.

 “I swear I’ll keep you safe [name]. I won’t let anything happen to you, I… I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you” he said mournfully, his head gazing down at your hand.

“Z look at me, please” you said, his head slowly turned to look at you. You lifted your hand to caress his cold cheek and smiled your iconic gentle smiles.

“You saved me, thank you. You haven’t lost me yet, silly” you chuckled. In return Zombieman smiled a small smile, a warm sensation spread across his chest and his gut felt like it fluttered as he heard you laugh.

“[Name]… I want to be able to truly protect you. I wish we were more than mentor and disciple, I-“Before he could finish, you let out another small giggle. A soft red hue passed Zombieman’s pale face.

“I want to be with you too Z” you said, a smile still present on your gentle features. Zombieman let out a relieved sigh and leaned to peck your cheek. Finally, you found someone who gave your life meaning and encouraged you to become a better hero the same could be said for Zombieman.

[makeste]

Top 10 Favorite Deku Moments

so it’s Deku’s birthday today!! and since he is the best boy in the world and I love him, I am going to do one of those “top ten favorite...” lists for him just like I did for Kacchan back in April. these are going to be in chronological order, and the last two will be spoilers, so I’ll label them to make sure no one gets caught unawares.

happy birthday Deku. and this post turned out to be super long, like 4000 words, so I’m sorry, but you deserve it though.

1. “Most of the top heroes show signs of greatness even as children.”

okay so before I get started, let me just warn y’all upfront that a full four out of ten of these moments will involve Bakugou. I’ve said before that the relationship between Izuku and Katsuki is full stop my favorite part of the series, and this is absolutely still true, so yeah.

that being said, what makes this particular scene one of my favorites isn’t just that it’s an important moment between them (I’ll get into that relationship more two entries down); it also just so happens that this is the crucial moment which everything else in the series can ultimately be traced back to. this is the moment that inspires All Might to hand his power down to a quirkless middle-schooler, because despite being virtually powerless, Izuku proves that he has the heart and soul of a hero. he moves without thinking, without any kind of plan. it’s extraordinarily stupid, and incredibly selfless. it doesn’t matter to him that he has no way to actually fight this villain. it doesn’t matter that less than an hour ago, Bakugou was taunting him and burning his notebook. it doesn’t matter that he could easily be hurt or killed. the only thing that matters is that someone needs help. that’s it. it’s that simple. 

what makes Izuku a hero is that he is literally incapable of standing by and not taking action in moments like this. he acts on reflex to save others. his instinct in moments of danger and despair is to help, in any way he can. that’s the core of his character. and it shines through in this moment, and All Might sees it immediately, and it spurs him to take action, and from here on out everything changes.

2. “He didn’t utilize his full power. He just concentrated it into his fingertip...!”

fast-forward to the first day of superhero school, and our boy finds himself immediately in a tight spot again because his teacher is a stern and unsympathetic asshole whose way of showing consideration for his students is to mercy-expel anyone he deems not up to par. problem is, Izuku can’t actually use his new quirk without blowing himself up from the inside out, and he’s competing against what is probably the most gifted group of students U.A. has ever had. this is what is commonly referred to as “a pickle.” a jam. a quandary, if you will. if he breaks all his bones to pass the test, Aizawa will flunk him anyway. what’s a little green hero to do.

Izuku solves this problem in a typical Izuku fashion, meaning that his solution is somehow reckless, self-sacrificing, and frankly brilliant in its simplicity. rather than break all of his bones, Izuku sacrifices one (1) bone in order to launch a baseball into space, thus proving he can adapt his quirk to be useful without taking himself out and just adding to the problem. it’s worth noting that this is only his second-ever time using One for All, too. the fact that he has never had a quirk in his life up til this point and yet manages to control OFA to this degree on just his second go-around is damn impressive.

but what’s even more impressive is the way he simply outsmarts the test here. he calmly takes in the situation, thinks about the options at his disposal, and arrives at a logical solution that most people wouldn’t even have considered, because it involves intentionally breaking his own finger, which is an absurdly self-destructive thing to do just to pass a damn fitness test. but it works!! and it impresses the shit out of Aizawa too. and I just really love this moment because it’s such a perfect example of Deku both being smart and also just plain not giving a fuck and being the plussest ultra ever omfg.

3. “I can’t say much. But you should know this, at least...!”

so now we come to the second moment on this list involving Kacchan, and already there is a pattern emerging here: namely, that these moments of conflict and then reconciliation between the two of them inevitably end up being some of the most pivotal moments in the series. this particular scene comes on the heels of their battle in All Might’s first hero class, during which Deku soundly defeats Bakugou and makes it clear beyond all doubt that HE IS HERE!! and not going anywhere and Bakugou is just going to have to deal. Bakugou does a very poor job of dealing, however, and spends the rest of the afternoon super-quiet and caught up in his inferiority complex and convinced that Deku has been hiding this from him their whole childhood just to fuck with him.

most people, when put in a similar situation, would be all “fucking serves you right tbh” and just brush it right off. but Izuku doesn’t. or more accurately, I should say that he can’t. once again he acts on pure instinct when Kacchan’s welfare is involved, and this time it results in him blurting out his biggest secret -- a secret he was sworn to by All Might himself -- simply because he can’t stand to see Kacchan so miserable and he can’t bear the thought of him believing that Izuku really had been tricking him.

this is so extraordinary to me for a number of reasons. first and foremost, because Izuku’s altruism knows absolutely no bounds. he and Kacchan are on possibly the worst terms any two people could be on. he has absolutely no obligation to tell him this. but he does, anyway! just to make him feel better! second, there’s the fact that he doesn’t intend to do it, but it just comes blurting out. Izuku’s feelings toward Kacchan are complicated, as we know. and yet whatever the reason may be, Izuku demonstrates again and again that it’s a relationship he wants to hold onto, and he does his best to protect and preserve what little pieces of it he can. 

and lastly, this is now the second example of what will become a well-established theme in the series of Izuku going out of his way to save Katsuki. he does this again and again. he tries to help him after he falls from the log bridge. he rushes to save him from the sludge monster. he tells him about his quirk. he nearly fails their final exam because he goes back for him after All Might knocks him out. he runs into a forest full of villains to try and save him in spite of having two broken arms. he goes to Kamino with Kirishima and the others knowing full well it could get him expelled. and he fights him at night in Ground Beta even though they get into trouble for it later, because he sees how much pain Katsuki is in and he can’t turn his back on him. 

over and over again he puts himself in harm’s way for Katsuki’s sake, fully expecting no gratification to ever come from it, but doing it anyway. because he’s a hero, and because heroes don’t ask whether or not someone deserves to be saved. they just save them. this to me is the most incredible aspect of Izuku’s character. his heart is just that big. he is exceptionally, impossibly selfless and forgiving and good. and that’s just who he is. and Bakugou is lucky enough to be on the receiving end of that, whether he likes it or not, and ultimately over the course of these repeated encounters, he ends up changing for the better himself. and this moment in particular will, eventually, lead to the two of them actually reconciling for realsies when Bakugou finally figures it out and is subsequently inducted into the OFA Scooby Squad of Destiny. so yeah. this scene is so fucking important I can’t even begin. god I really went off on a tangent there. anyways.

4. “And Todoroki... isn’t you!”

so here’s another battle which highlights Izuku’s willingness to go to absurd and horrifying lengths to sacrifice himself for the sake of others. this entire fight is nothing short of ridiculous. Deku is ridiculous. let me break it down for you. Todoroki comes up to Deku before this fight and is all “hey I made a vow to never use my left side in battle because my dad only had me to use me as a tool to defeat All Might and he basically ruined my life.” in response, Deku says he’s aiming to become the strongest hero and so he’ll definitely win. he then proceeds to break his own fingers to blast Todoroki with repeated OFA attacks, all the while screaming at him that everyone is going all out and doing their best, and it’s arrogant and disrespectful of Todo to think he can beat their determination with only half of his power. 

Deku has absolutely zero regard for his own well-being in this fight -- by the end of the battle his bones are in splinters -- and his teachers observe that even if he does win, he won’t be in any kind of shape to move on to the next match. basically, he throws aside all of his own ambitions and even his own sense of self-preservation (if he even has one; it’s honestly debatable at this point you guys), all for the sole purpose of helping Todoroki realize that his power is his own and not his father’s, and to break free of the revenge-tinted tunnel vision keeping him from following his own dreams. the whole thing leaves Todoroki awestruck, and even though Deku eventually loses the fight, he gains a friend for life, and Todo fans everywhere are in his debt. 

real fucked up what he did to his fingers, though. but it just goes to show that nobody is perfect.

5. “I’m here to save you, Iida!”

I freaking love this moment you guys, and I can’t even explain why. except that who doesn’t love a good old-fashioned last-minute shounen save? Iida is seconds away from meeting his death at the hands of the world’s most annoyingly long-winded Ninjas Turtles cosplayer when Deku drops in out of nowhere and just socks the guy square in the jaw. it is satisfying as fuck. honestly that would have been awesome enough, but what makes it even better is that Horikoshi goes into some detail to explain that Deku didn’t just coincidentally happen to find Iida at the exact crucial moment, but actually used his Big Hero Brain to deduce Iida’s location through a series of shrewd observations and insightful hunches. and he turns out to be bang on the money, and that moment where Stain is reeling from the punch and Iida is looking up at him like, “Midoriya?!” and Deku sticks the landing in slow motion and says “Bingo!” in fucking English is just so fucking badass, guys. not to mention that this is also the debut of his Shoot Style on top of everything else. to sum up, this is one of the best entrances in the entire series, and just one of the coolest things Deku has ever done, IMO. you’re cool, Deku.

6. “You clocked me with all of your heart.”

yeah so you may at this point be sensing a pattern with some of these moments. yet again Deku does something stupid and risky because he sees Kacchan in trouble and all logic and reason immediately fly out the window. in this case it’s even more ridiculous, because Katsuki is not actually in any real danger at all, and by going back for him Izuku completely loses sight of what Katsuki got himself all beat up for in the first place. and yet he does it anyway! again! without thinking! like, he makes it maybe two steps away, and then he overhears Kacchan’s teary-eyed overdramatic and determined speech, and he immediately goes “oh fuck this I can’t do this” and turns back and grins maniacally at All Might before soundly punching the shit out of him. it is complete nonsense. there is no reason for it. Katsuki himself is furious when he finds out about it later. but does Deku care?? no, he does not care. and do I? no I do not because it’s the best and I love it.

7. “Let’s do our best, okay?”

this scene is feels city you guys. feels o’clock. zero dark feels. I almost put the “you’re next” scene here instead, but in the end this scene won out because (1) hug!! and (2) this is really the continuation of all of those emotions anyway, and it’s where the catharsis is at.

so let’s break this down since there’s a ton going on here. Deku is wrestling with the grief of knowing that All Might the hero, the Symbol of Peace, is gone forever. the pillar he and the rest of the world relied on to always be there isn’t there, any more. that sense of security is gone. and that’s a hard enough thing to come to grips with on its own, but put it together with the knowledge that he is the one who needs to step up now and fill those shoes, before he ever expected to, before he’s ready, and I can only begin to imagine how overwhelmed he must feel. and then on top of that!! All Might tells him he’s proud of him and relieved that he made it out of Kamino unharmed! and he tells him that he’s going to be there for him and that they’ll face the challenges up ahead together.

so for poor Deku, when you put that all together, we’ve got (a) that sense of loss, (b) fear and anxiety over the unknown difficulties to come, (c) various imposter syndrome feelings that he might not be good enough to handle it, (d) whatever misplaced guilt he may be dealing with for being one of the reasons All Might lost his power, however inevitable it might have been, and last but not least, (e) the deeply profound and humbling feeling of being loved and supported by the man he loves like a father, and knowing that no matter how scary things get, he won’t have to do this alone. so in spite of everything else, there’s that sense of relief and gratitude there too. he can do this. it will be okay. his dad is there.

all of that emotion, packed in one tearful hug. no wonder the kid is crying his eyes out. I would be too. in fact I did, and have no shame in doing so, and I would do it again. good job Horikoshi.

8. “This fight may very well have been a meaningless one... but...”

motherfucker did I not warn you there would be four different BakuDeku moments in this?? and that’s with me reining myself in too to be quite frank. that’s just how it is. it’s my list!! 

anyway, so I’m not sure whether or not an entire fight counts as a “moment”, but I’m putting it out there anyway because I’m incapable of narrowing this down any more than that. I could have an entire separate list of Top Ten Deku VS Kacchan Part 2 Moments and I’m sure I would still wind up leaving something out. I love all of it. the whole damn thing. it’s such a huge turning point for them both. they finally sort everything out. truth bombs being hurled left and right. it’s so good. agh.

but here are some of Deku’s highlights: (1) immediately shifting from trying to talk Kacchan down to fighting him outright with no hesitation once he realizes what the fight is actually about, (2) despite knowing how Kacchan feels, allowing himself to be just a bit selfish for once and get caught up in his own rival feels and trying to prove his worth as All Might’s successor, (3) complimenting Kacchan in the middle of the fight because of course he does, (4) openly admitting how much he admired Kacchan growing up and that he thought he was amazing, (5) getting so worked up that he loses control for a moment and jumps to 8% in one of the most badass moments of the whole series, (6) acknowledging to himself that even though he really shouldn’t, he kinda digs Kacchan’s rougher “I’LL KILL YOU, ASSHOLE” side anyway and emulates it without thinking when he forgets himself and that Kacchan is his image of victory, and lastly, (7) being a sneaky bastard and throwing a punch in with his shoot style knowing full well it will catch Kacchan off guard, which it fucking does.

Deku goes hog wild in this fight. he has a grand old time and even manages to achieve a new power-up, because he and Kacchan always do manage to bring out the best in each other, when they’re not bringing out the worst. you can’t watch this fight and fail to notice how insanely fired up Deku is compared to his usual fights. he is into it. he is ready and willing to throw down. he is here to kick ass and take names!! this is the impact Kacchan has on him. thirty fucking seconds into his therapy fight and Deku's maximum power output has increased by a whopping 60%. holy shit. mad lads.

it’s something not lost on All Might, who wraps things up by patiently explaining to the two of them how much they can learn from each other. and the whole thing concludes with the two of them becoming, as All Might puts it, “proper rivals.” that’s right, their rivalry is now officially approved and sanctioned by the motherfucking Symbol of Peace. well done, boys. these two are going to be absolutely terrifying when they grow up.

***SPOILERS FOR THE MANGA PAST THIS POINT***

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9. “...But you were there.”

okay so I have this indecisive kind of thing going on with whether or not I think All Might is actually going to die, and whether or not I want to see it happen. some weeks, like this particular week, I am on the side of BITCH DON’T YOU DARE because everything is goddamn sad enough as it is, Horikoshi, and I don’t need any more reasons to lie awake at night crying over fictional characters! but then there are other days when I think about how devastatingly, breathtakingly heartbreaking it would be, and for some reason I think, shit, yeah, he’s gotta do it. go ahead and hurt us good. make us feel things. leave no survivors. just fucking wreck our shit, go on ahead.

but then I read this scene again and think, there’s something so incredibly powerful about the fact that All Might started out the series believing he was going to die and being resigned to that fate and making preparations for it, only to be completely blindsided by the love he has for this boy and what that ends up doing to him. his love for Izuku gives him the strength to fight against fate. it gives him the resolve to look the grim reaper in the eye and say “to hell with this, I’m going to live.” it’s his reason to keep going. it’s his purpose. and god but that’s some powerful shit. characters saying “fuck you” to destiny? I am weak as hell for that, hell yes give me more. give me all of that.

and then Deku in this scene. pleading with All Might to keep living. “you have to live to see that moment, when I can tell the world, ‘I am here!’” promising him that no matter what happens, when the time comes, they’ll bend fate together. “without fail.” and just, holy fuck. when he says it, you really believe they can do it. because if anyone can figure out a way to conquer the inevitable, it’s this kid.

10. “Senpai... if I said that I would give you my quirk, would you...?”

last but not least, today just happens to be Mirio’s birthday as well, so it only seems fitting to end with this moment, which in the span of a single page neatly sums up why both of these kids are worthy beyond a doubt of being the next Symbol of Peace. Deku selflessly tries to offer Mirio his quirk, and Mirio instantly rejects him. doesn’t even know what’s going on, really, but just rejects the offer out of hand. “no thanks. then you would be the one subjected to this hardship.” and we can’t very well fucking have that, now can we. nope. not on Mirio’s watch. never mind that he just lost his quirk and his mentor within the span of the past twenty four hours. he wastes no time in coming to Deku’s aid in spite of that, assuring him that he did great and that everything will be just fine. so just smile already!!

but the fact that Deku was even willing to make the offer just once again goes to show how astonishingly good he is. he knows better than anyone what it’s like to be quirkless and powerless. he knows exactly what Mirio is going through. what’s more, Mirio is absolutely right that Deku did fucking amazing and totally saved the day and without him they would have all been screwed! but all Deku can see in this moment is how deserving Mirio is, and so he decides that in order to help him, he’s prepared to make what for him is the ultimate sacrifice. the power that All Might gave him. his dream of becoming the greatest hero. everything he’s worked for up to this point. he’s prepared to throw all of that away if Mirio just says the word. there truly isn’t a selfish bone in this kid’s body.

but Mirio says no. because Mirio is also selfless. in conclusion we had just better hope the two of them never wind up reaching a door together at the same time, because the ensuing battle of who holds it open for whom could singlehandedly bring this series to a dead halt. the ultimate stalemate. they are too good and we don’t deserve them.

so anyways, that’s it! happy birthday kid. and here’s one more for the road.

11. “Dear Midoriya...”

a story in three acts. character development. growth. god bless.

[thedreamsmith]

How (Not) to Seduce a Blueshirt (Chapter 4)

@atc74​ @alleiradayne​ @arrowsandmixtapes​ @captain-s-rogers​ for #OC appreciation day 2020

Warnings: Swearing, mild sexual situation 

Pairing: Jim Kirk x OFC

Chapter summary:  Jim is allergic to first dates.

For some reason, Bones had not been thrilled with his news. In fact, he had let out a stream of particularly foul expletives and pinned Jim with a glare that by all accounts should’ve set his hair on fire.

Even so, Bones had agreed to help him pick out something to wear to dinner. For all his CMO loved to jab him with hypos, he was the perfect Southern gentleman and he had the manners and fashion sense to match.

Once Jim had swallowed his pride and comm’d Bones, the good doctor had strode into his hotel room within ten minutes, taken one look at what he was wearing and ordered him to strip because ‘Good God man, you’re not going on a first date to a nice restaurant with a pretty girl wearing that.’

Personally, Jim had thought what he’d been wearing hadn’t been one of the worst getups he’d tried on before Bones got there, but he deferred to the older man’s judgement anyway.

Between the pair of them they had finally agreed on an outfit and that was how Jim found himself standing in front of the mirror, watching his reflection eye the dark jeans, white shirt and dress shoes that Bones had talked him into. They had compromised on the leather jacket, but only because Jim had threatened to reprogram every computer on the ship (besides Spock - he hadn’t quite figured out to rewire him yet) to address Bones as ‘snugglebunny.’

Mirror-Jim looked as nervous as he felt.

How had he convinced himself he could do this? He was a playboy hick from backwater Idaho. Reyne had a medical degree, no criminal record, standards…

It felt as though a metal band was squeezing his chest; growing tighter and tighter as the chrono ticked closer to when he was supposed to meet Reyne in the plaza.

The room was too bright, the hum of the city outside too loud and his reflection had gone blurry.

‘Lights at fifty percent.’ He managed to choke out, though his throat felt like it was closing over. ‘Bones…’

Jim spun towards his friend, stumbling as he struggled to catch his breath.

‘Think ‘m having an allergic reaction.’

And then Bones’ was gripping his shoulders, hands firm and steady as he pushed him towards the bed. He barely registered as his friend waved the tricorder over him once, twice. The frown lines on Bones’ forehead deepened as he checked the results then flicked his gaze back to Jim and the way his shoulders heaved, trying to draw enough oxygen in to stop the room from spinning.

McCoy drew in a deep breath before he spoke, his medical skills diagnosing the issue even as his knowledge of Jim Kirk insisted that this was highly unlikely.

‘Outta all the things you’re allergic to, I doubt that proper first dates are one of them. You’re havin’ a panic attack, Jim.’

Jim briefly interrupted his breathe in, breathe out, don’t-throw-up cycle to shoot a poisonous glare at his friend.

‘Just breath, Jim. You’ll be alright.’ Bones kept his hands on his shoulders, grounding him. ‘Hell, Ree was chattering about this date with my nurses the other day – had to shoo her from the medbay so they could get anything done.’

Jim raised his head a little, expression hopeful.

‘Really?’

‘Yes, really. So quit being an idiot and keep your head between your knees. I don’t need you passing out before you’ve left your room. I had enough of carrying you back to your room at the Academy.’

*

Reyne was already in the plaza when he arrived. She was in conversation with a couple of Enterprise crew members. He recognised the taller, darker of the two men as one of Bones’ best nurses – distinctive for the sleeves of tattoos that disappeared beneath the cuffs of his civvies. The other was fair haired and shorter, also sporting tattoos and the same Scottish earth accent as Scotty and Reyne. As the trio turned to face him, he placed the shorter man as one of Scotty’s crew, a brilliant electrical engineer he’d picked from the Academy himself. Ensign Josh Watt.

Ensign Watt smirked and murmured something to her that made her blush and laugh as she waved them off.

But all thoughts of Reyne’s friends left his head as she stepped around nurse Stephen, towards him. Laughter danced in her eyes, a few shades darker than his own, as she took him in. In a navy, knee length dress, her curves could’ve stopped ships at warp speed.

The artificial lights of Yorktown had been dimmed to mimic sundown, and the lamps overhead illuminated her ivory skin in a warm glow.

‘You look amazing.’ Oh great, Jim. Thirty years old and that’s the best he could do?

‘Not too bad yourself, Captain.’ He glanced up from his own shoes to see that Reyne was smiling, amusement still glimmering in her eyes as she stepped closer.

Bolstered by the knowledge that he hadn’t cocked it up in the first five minutes, Jim let his features slip into a crooked grin. With slowly-returning confidence, he grasped her hand, bringing it up to his mouth and pressing a lingering kiss to her knuckles.

Reyne’s eyebrows shot up but she didn’t pull her hand away.

‘I promised Stephen that I’d let you know that I’m armed.’ She delivered the line with such casual amusement that his heart nearly stopped in his chest with a painful thud. But she tightened his grip on his hand before gracefully looping her arm around his waist. ‘Don’t worry, I don’t intend to use it. I very much want to be here.’

Her grin was warm as she tilted her head to one side, and her height meant that she didn’t need to raise her gaze far to meet his eyes. ‘I want to be here, Jim.’

‘You’re terrible.’ He draped his arm over her shoulders, enjoying the warmth of her body tucked against his side.

Reyne shrugged slightly, the movement shifting his arm. ‘I only own one knife. If you think that’s bad, you should meet Stephen - he always has at least two on his person at any given time. Legal carries, of course. Although there was that Cardassian hunting knife he was looking at last shore leave…’

She trailed off as she registered the expression of disbelief that must’ve shown on his face.

‘My friends are weird.’

‘I think Scotty and Jaylah would take offence to that.’ They passed storefronts and restaurants; lit with strings of jewel-toned lights and orbs that floated above the heads of passers-by.

‘Scotty was exalting the virtues of deep fried mars bars and pickle sandwiches yesterday. I don’t think he gets a say in this.’

‘That seems fair.’ Jim laughed, feeling lighter than he had in a long while. ‘So I have to ask, where are you keeping a knife in that get up?’

Reyne’s gaze slid slowly over to him as a wicked smirk lifted the corners of her mouth.

‘A lady never tells, Captain.’

*

It was well past midnight by the time they made it back to the hotel that most of the crew were staying in. His face hurt from the grin that he’d had on for most of the evening and his fingers were tangled with hers.

Too soon, they reached her door and the conversation petered out as they both silently acknowledged the choice that lay before them.

‘I really enjoyed tonight.’ It would seem that his sparkling wit had failed him once again tonight. He fumbled for the right words to convey what he felt, a way to secure another night like this and maybe another after that. ‘I just mean, I had expected to, of course, despite the panic attack I had earlier.’

‘Panic attack?’ Concern laced Reyne’s voice, brows kitting together as she searched his face.

Shit. He hadn’t meant to say that. Quick, Jim, think.

‘Right, here goes nothing.’ He forced himself to hold her gaze, to watch for her reaction. ‘For most of my life, I’ve never tried particularly hard when it comes to dating. Usually all it takes is an introduction and my reputation does the rest but with you, that doesn’t work cause you just don’t care. You’ve never fallen at my feet and you want more from me than a quick fuck and some pretty words. And that terrifies me. I panicked ‘cause I don’t believe I deserve someone like you, Reyne.’

‘You’re right – I don’t care about any of those things. I said yes because you’re also the Jim Kirk who regularly attempts to sacrifice himself for his friends; who actually died to save a ship full of people he barely knew. I said yes because underneath the charisma and the recklessness and the batshit crazy, even without knowing you all that well, I’ve seen and heard glimpses of a heart of gold and an intellect to rival Commander Spock’s. My point is, you’re multifaceted, Jim; and are much more than you think you are. Plus, the package it’s all wrapped up in doesn’t hurt.’ A smirk lifted the corner of her mouth. ‘I’m aware you don’t have the best track record when it comes to long-term partners; but if you’re willing to try, then I’ll happily boldly go where no one else has before.’

Well, if that wasn’t an invitation then he didn’t know what was…

The sound of the Captain’s Oath falling from that mouth was downright obscene, but it was all Jim could do to lean forward, a silent answer to a question she hadn’t asked out loud. He closed his eyes, held his breath until he felt the warmth of her mouth against his. Reyne pressed slow kisses to his lower lip, lingering too long for it to be called chaste, but far too reverent to be lewd.

Jim found that it was nice to share a first kiss that didn’t taste of alcohol – that wasn’t fast and hard and needy. Not to say that there was no lust there, just that he was perfectly content to lean against the door of her room and continue this slow exploration of lips and tongues and teeth.

A whine escaped him as she pulled away; spots of colour high on her cheeks, lips ever-so-slightly swollen from the kiss.

‘You’re terrible for my self-control.’

‘Who needs self-control anyway?’ Certainly not James T Kirk. His grin was twelve kinds of filthy as he gazed at her with heavy-lidded eyes. ‘I might not be Uhura with her fancy xenolinguistics degree, but I’ve been told that I have excellent oral sensitivity.’

A beat of silence followed, before Reyne’s face crumpled and she doubled over with laughter, the sound rich and sweet and deeper than he had expected. Jim decided right there that Reyne’s laughter was his favourite sound in the entire galaxy and he would gladly make a fool out of himself just to hear it every day of their 5-year mission.

Dark eyebrows knitted together as she fought for breath, and she could already feel herself flushing to the tips of her ears. She thought back to the one time she had seen Jim shirtless in the medbay after an away mission – the man had a body made for pleasure and sin and even then, she had decided that no one should be allowed to be so goddamn beautiful.

‘And not just oral sensitivity,’ Jim pushed his advantage, never one to miss an opportunity. ‘Let’s not forget dexterity, flexibility, stamina-‘

The Many Virtues of Jim Kirk were cut short as Reyne grabbed the lapels of his jacket and yanked him down for another kiss – this one decidedly more heated. Her clever tongue flicked along the seam of lips before gently tugging his lower lip between her teeth, earning a low groan from Jim.

Jim tangled his fingers in her thick, dark locks, tugging hard enough to elicit a gasp from the doctor.

‘Is this your way of telling me to shut up? Cause if it is, you can tell me to shut up anytime.’ And Jim found that he was entirely open to this kind of positive reinforcement, especially when it involved a hotter than Hell medical officer and her unholy way of finding that spot on his neck that – fuck.

Reyne bit down and his hips jerked involuntarily. Her thigh was a solid presence between his legs, the seam of her jeans enough to produce a maddening amount of friction against him and dammit he was the captain of Starfleet’s flagship, not some overeager teenager getting to second base with a girl for the first time.

Her smile took on a distinctly naughty cast and he’d be damned if it didn’t go straight to his dick – like he needed any help in that department. A pleasant daydream of an unruly science officer in need of punishment, pulled up in front of her captain for insubordination filled his brain.

‘I don’t put out on the first date, Jim.’ Her voice was soft, a gentle reminder. ‘It’s late, I’ll see you tomorrow?’

‘Yeah, see you tomorrow.’

With one last smile and a quick peck on the cheek, Reyne tapped in her room code and disappeared into the darkened room, leaving Jim to sag against the wall.

She had him wrapped around her finger already.

He was in so much shit.

[the-prince-and-the-thief]

Proof of Bonds

//I promised that I would post the story behind why Akechi has those mysterious red gloves, and here it is! Hope you guys like it!

TW: Gore, Death. 

     “Just show him th….” Ren stopped himself. He let out a weary sigh. “Actually, if he’s on his way here, it’s already too late.” 

     “I beg your pardon?” Sae tilted her head, “You just said that he’s going to kill you. Are you really giving up now?” 

     Yes. Ren thought. He knew that Sae wouldn’t understand, but he couldn’t do it again. If she knew, perhaps she would be lenient, but… Ren just couldn’t watch Akechi sacrifice himself again. And he couldn’t be the one behind that door again. The last sounds he would hear being Akechi’s desperate wailing was more than he could bear. 

     “Just trying another plan,” Ren said, a slight smirk on his face. “If it works, everything will be fine. And if it doesn’t… well, it won’t matter anyway.” 

     Sae sighed, and stood up. Ren would not be convinced to change his mind, this much they both knew for certain. 

     “If you’re sure,” She said as she turned to leave, “Just… don’t do anything reckless.” 

     He gave her a quiet nod as she shut the door, but deep down, he knew that his “plan”, if one was generous enough to call it that, was recklessness personified. Still, he wanted to believe that he’d made an impact on Akechi. He wanted more than anything to believe that his feelings had reached the guarded, lonely young man that he’d spent nearly four years trying to save. And if he hadn’t… then at least he could try again. 

     Ren closed his eyes. The interrogation hall was dead quiet. He could hear the sound of high heels clicking against concrete. Of an elevator door opening. Whispers in hushed tones between Sae and Akechi. Then a request from Akechi to the cop. 

     Sorry for bringing you into this. Ren thought, remembering what Akechi would very soon do to him. I have a feeling that you’ll be fine in the end, though. 

     After all, if Ren were to meet his end here, then the poor cop dragged into this situation would also have time turned back on him. 

     As Ren opened his eyes, the door also opened. Just as had happened before, he and the cop entered the room. His wine-dark eyes were cold and empty, and his gaze, as he entered the room, seemed fixed on something far beyond this small interrogation room. 

     As the door shut, Akechi waited for the cop to turn his back to him. He took the pistol the man carried and shot him with it. 

     “Huh?! W-what are you--” 

     With two silenced shots, the man fell to the ground in a bloody heap. The smell of copper and brain matter was burned into Ren’s memory by now. 

     “...Thank you, for all of this.” 

     Goro turned the gun on him. 

     “That’s right, you and your little friends were vital to our plan. That’s what you were going to say next, right?” 

     That got the empty look out of Goro’s eyes. He stared at Ren, wide-eyed with shock, and gasped. 

     “H-how--” 

     “I can’t explain everything. Right now, we’re still in his domain.” Ren looked up at the man who held a pistol to his forehead without fear. “Just let me say my piece. After that, if you still want to kill me… then do it.” 

     “Very well,” Goro’s cold, monotone voice made Ren shudder. It was as though the young man wasn’t there anymore. Perhaps he wasn’t. People weren’t made to kill, after all. It was possible that to keep up his role, he kept his true self far, far away, protected from pain.

     “Let me just start with this- I know what you’re planning. You want that man to reach the top of the world, then ruin him, and enjoy that brief moment of power over him.” Ren carefully watched Goro’s expression. He looked not horrified but instead angry. “...Do you really think that the masses will care? If all of this scandal hasn’t destroyed him yet, why would one more sex scandal make the public hate Masayoshi Shido?”

     “What the hell do you know?!” Glaring with murderous intent, Goro shoved the muzzle of his gun against Ren’s forehead. “You think you’ve got me all figured out?! You piece of shit!”

     “Goro, you’re being used. He’ll just throw you away when he’s done with you.” 

     “Shut the hell up!” The man screamed. “Do you think you can look down on me?! You’re just some piece of trash living in an attic!”

     If Goro was intending to upset Ren, he was bound to be sorely disappointed. If anything, Ren looked sad, like he was watching a family member writhe about in a straight jacket. 

     “We’re both being used. At least, I was.” Ren sighed, “You were going to say that this is where my justice ends. But, Goro… I’m not fighting for my justice anymore. I’ve already won that battle. I know you won’t understand what I’m saying, but I want you to remember all of this.”

     Goro clicked his teeth and experimentally tightened his grip on the trigger. Ren did not flinch. He had no reaction in the slightest. 

     “I already know that my justice will win. I was chained to hell itself, and I broke free. But I couldn’t leave you behind. All of this, it’s just a rigged game, and we got put on opposing sides.” Ren’s gaze was serious and unrelenting. Even the drugs he’d been given didn’t seem to be holding him back. “I’m not a pawn in this game anymore. I’m playing my own game, and I’m putting my bets on you.”

     “What do you mean…?”

     “I wish I could tell you, but I’m playing against a cheater. I’ve gone as far as I can go, but… we’re still here. I’m still on the chopping block. I… I’m sorry, Goro.”

     “Why are you apologizing? Are you mocking me?” Goro no longer seemed to know if he was angry, frightened, or saddened. His eyes quivered and darted about like they were looking for a way out.

     “No. I’m sorry. I thought that I had gotten through to you. I thought that I had made it clear… that things didn’t have to be like this.” Ren bit his lip and tasted blood. “I need you to do one last thing for me.”

     Ren pulled something out of the pocket of his school uniform— a pair of red leather gloves. His gloves, from the metaverse. He’d hidden them carefully before his arrest, just in case. He slid them across the table to Goro. 

     “Take this,” He pleaded, “If you take my life… if you aren’t satisfied with what comes after this… there’s an airsoft shop in Shibuya. You’ll find a door that shouldn’t be there. Unlock the door. I’ve given you the key to change your fate.”

     Goro took the pair of gloves. There was something in one of them, something hard. He pulled it out. A key in a deep, eerie blue. It seemed to glow with some sort of power. His eyes seemed to shine with a faint recognition. 

     “This is…” For a moment, Ren thought that Goro had truly remembered… but Goro shook his head. “...I see. Have you said your piece?”

     “All but one thing.” 

     Ren felt the muzzle press against his forehead again. It made his bruises throb with pain. 

     “Any last words, then?”

     Ren smiled at Goro, a warm, gentle smile. His gaze softened, and his eyes began to water. Ren didn’t fear death, not anymore. He had seen the other side enough to never fear it again. But this… these words? They were a weight he had carried for years, and he feared to speak them. 

     “I love you, Goro. I know you’ll do what’s right.”

     BANG!

                                                        ———

     With one pull of the trigger, Goro Akechi severed the only bond he’d ever had by his own hand.

     Bits of brain matter and misty blood splattered the walls. Some landed on his cheek. It sprayed his gloves in a fine mist. The thick, coppery scent of blood and exposed flesh filled the air, suffocating the detective. The warmth that Ren’s face had just moments before was gone, the life in his eyes lost, and he fell. He slammed into the table and bled in deep pools of crimson. 

     This kind of scene was something Goro had seen so many times before. He thought he would be numb to the feeling of blood soaking his shoes and socks, that he no longer would feel sickened by the unforgettable stench of death. Yet, his eyes stung. They blurred and watered. His throat tightened and burned as hot stomach acid forced its way out. He lurched over and retched, staring with empty eyes as blood and vomit intermingled on the floor beneath him. 

     “...Why?” 

     Why did he say any of that? Why did he have such unfailing faith in Goro? Why did he seem to read the detective like an open book? Why did he apologize? And why….

     “Why in the hell did you say you loved me?! Why were you looking at me like that?!”

     Goro clung to the table with all his might, lest his knees give out in him. He felt blood soaking through his gloves. The slimy, lukewarm texture made him nearly vomit again. 

     Drip, drip… water fell to the ground. Only then did he realize that he was sobbing. 

     He had to go. He had to. He couldn’t stay here. He placed the gun in Ren’s right hand and took out his phone. He couldn’t be seen like this, covered in blood, vomit, and tears. It would ruin the whole plan. As if he hadn’t ruined it already. 

     He didn’t remember what he was thinking as he escaped. He just ran and ran, through Mementos, through the train stations, to his lonely apartment. It all felt unreal like he was watching himself from a distance. The only sensation that told him this was undeniable reality was his agonizingly loud heartbeat, beating against his chest and ringing in his ears. 

     He ran into his shower, nearly forgetting to undress in his haste to be clean. When was the last time he felt this much pain after ending someone’s life? Not since the death of Wakaba Isshiki….

     No matter how many times he washed his hair, or how roughly he scrubbed at his skin, Goro still felt the stench of death stain him to his core. It felt like his body was rotting away before his eyes. He wanted so badly to scream, but he remembered the thin walls of his apartment. Someone would hear him if he did. 

     As the adrenaline slowly wore off, the pain set in. He had rubbed his skin raw and bleeding. His body felt heavy, ragged and worn. The ringing in his ears and the tunnel vision that had kept him going had begun to fade— replaced by the ring of his cellphone. 

     Reluctantly, he turned off the water and answered. The familiar voice on the other end seemed almost mocking to Goro.

     “I’ve been trying to contact you for an hour! Where are you?! Has the job been done?!” The voice of his father felt like a needle to the eardrum. 

      “M… my apologies. The job is complete. It seems the leader of the phantom thieves committed a… a murder-suicide.” The script he had so carefully planned fell apart as that warm, gentle smile lingered in his mind. “There was some cleanup that needed to be done on my end… I used the MetaNav to escape.”

     “Of course.” Shido’s scathing tone was like salt in his wounds. “See to it that any evidence is properly disposed of. I expect you to begin with the rest of the phantom thieves shortly.” 

     “Yes… certainly.” Goro had no energy to argue. He merely hung up the phone. 

     What Ren had said… he knew from the sound of his voice and from the determined look in his eye that not a single word had been a lie. That man had truly placed all of his hopes in Goro. He had loved him. He had been trying through every day they spent together to make that clear to Goro. And Goro repaid that kindness and love with a bullet between his eyes. 

     His time with Ren had truly been the happiest days of his life. He… he hadn’t wanted to kill him. But he always assumed that Ren would never accept the disgusting, broken man that Goro had become. He thought that he had to kill Ren before he could throw him away. 

     “I was so… so foolish.” He sobbed, “It didn’t have to be this way….”

     And if Ren had been right with all he had said, then what was any of this good for?! What had he killed his one chance at happiness for?! For a fleeting moment of power before he inevitably ended his own pathetic life? 

     That key. Ren had said to use that strange blue key, hadn’t he? 

     Goro threw on a shirt and pants, hastily buttoned them, and grabbed the gloves that Ren had given him. They were, he realized, the gloves he had worn as a phantom thief. Ren truly had given Goro a piece of himself, with the hope that Goro would do the right thing. 

     I’ll make this right.

                                                        --------

     In a dusty corner of Shibuya lay a simple airsoft store. The area itself looked like a gathering place for criminals, but in Goro’s state of mind, this only meant that he fit right in.

     Right where Ren had said it would be, there was a blue door, not unlike a prison cell. It seemed attached to nothing and like it would go to nowhere. But it had the same deep blue glow as the key he now held in his red glove clad hand. 

     Goro placed the key inside the lock. It effortlessly fit in, and the door nearly opened on its own. Where nothing had been before, there was a deep passageway lit in eerie blue.

     Taking a hesitant step inside, the so-called detective felt a wave of vertigo. His vision seemed to warp, and for a moment, he could not tell if he was moving at all. When his sight came back to him, he saw a prison cell in front of him. 

     It seems like where I belong right about now… He thought to himself. He moved towards the gate in slow, labored steps. A ball and chain weighed him down, he realized. Fitting. 

     Inspecting the area beyond the bars that contained him, he saw a being that wasn’t quite human. His large eyes nearly bulged out of his bald head. He scarcely thought the man could blink. He was lanky in limb but had a sturdy torso and a head that seemed too heavy for his body to handle. But nothing was as strange as the large, almost beak-like nose that jutted out far more than any nose reasonably could. The man was like an unsettling doll- resembling a human but just different enough to make one’s skin crawl. 

     If the long-nosed man noticed Goro’s confusion, he certainly didn’t make it clear. He grinned an unnaturally wide grin and gestured for the young man to pay attention. 

     “Welcome once again to the Velvet Room,” The voice of the man was nasally (as expected), but high pitched and somewhat gentle. Strange though the man was, his voice put Goro at ease. “I see you’ve borrowed a key once more. I trust that you’re here because you wish to change the path you’ve awakened to.”

     Goro opened his mouth, but the words wouldn’t come to him. He shut his mouth, then opened it again. 

     “I’ve been here before…?”

     “In another time, you visited me once before, guided by the Trickster.”

     Goro had absolutely no idea what he meant, but he at least gathered that the “trickster” he mentioned was probably Ren. 

     “I… I can’t remember.”

     “Indeed, another force has taken hold of you. Mind, body, and destiny all rest in the hands of that force.”

      Goro recalled Ren saying that they were being used in a rigged game. He wondered if this “other force” was the one using him…

      “Ren, he told me to come here. He said you could change this.” Goro’s eyes were watering again. He had never cried this easily before… what had Ren done to him? “Please… I’ve made so many mistakes. If there’s any way I can change any of that, or make up for what I’ve done— I’ll do anything! Just bring him back!”

     The unusual man’s expression did not change, but his voice softened, “...I believe humanity has limitless potential, and thus, the Velvet Room exists, between dreams and reality, mind and matter… if you truly wish to live up to your potential, then I will give you that chance. You have grown since your last visit. I sense a change in your heart.

     “Still, to break the shackles of fate is no simple feat. Do you truly wish to try again?”

      “I… I don’t just wish to. I need to. He trusted me to do the right thing, and I betrayed him. I destroyed everything I had… I want to prove that he wasn’t wrong to believe in me.”

     This seemed to satisfy the being that sat before him. 

     “Then let the wheels of time reverse. That key, of course, must return to its rightful owner… but the proof of your bonds will remain to guide you.”

     The long-nosed man snapped his fingers, and Goro felt as though his entire being was beginning to unravel. 

     Ren… I’ll fix this. I’ll repay your kindness. This is my vow. 

     Ren…

     I love you.

                                                          ---------

     “Now arriving at Shibuya station. Please gather all your belongings before disembarking.”

     Goro Akechi didn’t remember falling asleep. It was difficult for him to rest when he knew other people were watching. Yet, here he was, rubbing the sleep from his eyes in the middle of a busy train. 

     He looked down at his left hand. Cradled in his red-gloved hand was a note with the name of his next target--

     Wait. Red gloves?

     “When did I…?” He blinked. He could have sworn that he had been wearing black gloves when he’d fallen asleep… 

     He shook his head. I must have forgotten, he thought, But… where did these come from? I don’t recall purchasing them. 

     The bright red gloves didn’t fit his outfit, to begin with, so he probably wouldn’t have bought them. But the gloves felt important to him. Just looking at them filled his chest with a bittersweet, almost nostalgic feeling.

     “Someone must have given these to me,” he realized, “But I can’t remember who…”

     For now, Akechi didn’t have time to answer his question. As he disembarked the train, luggage in hand, he reminded himself why he had come to this city. The gift he had been granted. The chance to ruin Masayoshi Shido. 

     I can’t afford to make a mistake now. 

     He typed “Mementos” into the red-eyed app that he carried, feeling the waves of nausea ripple through him as he entered the twisted subway. 

     “Now, I believe this one was a subway driver, yes? This should be simple enough….” 

[orrianreaper]

sorry im going through all ur pages and saw the ask meme thing u reblogged (/post/190372681581/) djkhjkgh. if you're still up for doing it i'd love to know about paara!

There’s no need to apologise, I’m always up for talking more about my OC’s! xD Thank you for asking about my little Centurion!

Full Name:

Centurion Paara Ghostburn

Gender and Sexuality:

Female, and I’d say she’s possibly something along the lines of Demisexual, although I’ve nothing set in stone for her really.

Pronouns:

She/her.

Ethnicity/Species:

Asura.

Birthplace and Birthdate:

Rata Sum, 1301 AE. (If i’ve done my maths right anyway)

Guilty Pleasures:

Golem tournaments, honey roasted meats, any sort of kits that let you make little mechanical miniatures of things. She has one which is based on the charr tanks / dunerollers!

Phobias:

I’m not sure if she really has any specific phobias, she’s pretty hardy and doesn’t tend to get caught up in fears very much.

What They Would Be Famous For:

For stopping the overrunning of a Charr outpost from becoming a full-on massacre.  For being an Asuran Legionnaire within the Iron Legion, even having recently been promoted to Centurion by Smodur himself. For being a member of Reverie’s Vengeance, the Commander’s personal guild, which means being a key player in the deaths of the Elder Dragons thus far. For her studies and advancements regarding foefire ghosts for her Legion. She’s fairly impressive.

What They Would Get Arrested For:

Probably for starting some kind of fight with some Charr who made an arsey comment about an Asura leading a Warband. Or blowing something up, she does that a lot as well.

OC You Ship Them With:

I don’t romantically ship Paara with anyone currently, however she does have a platonic soulmate in the form of her second-in-command Ghosttorn (first name still pending.). They’ve got a very fun relationship, they love each other a lot despite the grief they give each other. Who better to call you on your shit than your bestie?

OC Most Likely To Murder Them:

If she calls him Fluffy one more time it might be Meri honestly. But in terms of actual murder, the only OC example I can currently think of is Ovidius Suneater pre-redemption. Ovidius was a childhood friend of Merianus who was inducted into the Flame Legion and became a high ranking Shaman, in order to try and get to Meri, Ovidius staged attacks of Reverie’s Vengeance. In particular, he attacked the Ghost Warband’s workstation, since the Black Citadel is a lot closer to Flame than anything else. Paara and her Ghost warband did Not take well to having Flame on their asses, that’s for sure.

Favorite Movie/Book Genre:

Probably action films, lots of explosions and gadgets even if she’d nitpick how impossible some of the devices are. She probably has a big soft spot for anything with a group or team of heroes as well, over solo protagonists.

Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche:

Hmm, I’m not sure on this one. 

Talents and/or Powers:

Paara was a spectrologist prior to joining the Legions, meaning she studied Ghosts, so she has a very large amount of experience with the undead and spectral creatures of many kinds. She’s also a talented Engineer, able to repair almost anything she comes across given the time, with the usual armoury of abilities on her belt that Engineers have.

On top of that, she’s plenty combat experienced and hardy as a result, having shifted to being a Holosmith in more recent years as the appeal of the sword and light projections really suited her front-line preferences. 

For Reverie’s Vengeance, Paara is essentially the Smart Guy of the group, and she’s more than happy about this.

Why Someone Might Love Them:

Paara’s brand of snark and self-confidence can be very appealing, she knows who she is and what she wants and isn’t afraid to be blunt about it. She likes to have fun and crack jokes, but she’s a fiercely determined person who will get what she wants or die trying. She won over the Gladium who now make up her own warband by that force of will and genuine talent. 

And she does genuinely care about people, again it was her Warband that taught her to put the merits of people over just technology, she’s a good team player and does her best to listen to others’ suggestions at every turn. She’s good at letting people feel heard. She’s heroic, she’s got self-sacrifice in spades and is always acting, never waiting.

Why Someone Might Hate Them:

Her self-assurance can easily come off as arrogance and narcissism. Her short temper can make her volatile, she can seem to flippant about serious matters with her propensity to snap out snarky comments. 

How They Change:

Before Paara joined the Legions she always had an obsession with them, since she was a child she loved their technology. However  it wasn’t until she started her efforts to join them that she slowly began to look at more of Charr society than just their war machines, and it was through her trials of trying to convince a Tribune to let her in that she learned to value what a Warband can actually be, what they can actually mean. She went from dismissing it, to the point she’s fiercely protective of all of her Ghosts and values them highly.

She’s also become more confident about her place in the Iron Legion with time, if someone wants to question why they should take any orders from some asura, she’ll snap that they should be taking their orders from a Centurion. It’s a bit of an ego growth, but also a confidence in who she is and that she’s happy where she is. She belongs in the Iron Legion, and god help anyone who wants to try and fight her on that.

Why You Love Them:

I love Paara for a load of reasons. She was my first Asura character, and my first Engineer, and Engie was the first class after Necro that I actively really enjoyed playing at the time. She’s one of my oldest gw2 characters, and she’s become such a cocky little badass that I can’t not love her. She’s got a fun, passionate temperament, and the reckless nature she has just makes her so much fun. I also find it hilarious my most Charr-like characters is instead a min-height bulky asura, and not either of my charr who actually grew up in the Legions, because that would make too much sense.