#like hes obviously bit physically all to strong (though he does know because stuff like how to use a gun and running- he has a gun on him)

[ratsbanes]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SAKAGUCHI ANGO AND SAKAGUCHI ANGO!!! this is especially cool because I literally just got done with The Dark Era light novel, and read some stuff from Sakaguchi Ango... So it's perfect?

[bomber-grl]

hi! I’m the anon who sent the naruto headcanons and I wanted to say that I loved them! I was wondering if you could please do more of them, always with team 7 and how the act at the beginning of a relationship/how they keep courting the male/gn reader, maybe how they act when they’re feeling jealous. Thank you again!

Relationship + Jealousy Headcanons

Pairing: Characters x Gn!Ninja!Reader (teammate)

Character(s): Naruto Uzumaki, Sakura Haruno, Sasuke Uchiha

A/n : I’m glad you loved the first ones and I hope you enjoy these too :]

Naruto Uzumaki

Once you start dating he’s in between these two categories: clingy and shy

One second he’d be the hyperactive person we all know (and love) him to be

Going on about Hokage stuff, ramen or honestly anything that comes up in that empty brain of his

Then he’d suddenly become like weirdly self aware, stiff up, turn to you, and continue but with a blush and be more quiet about his interests than before

You could assume it’s him being insecure but he really just gets bashful sometimes

I mean cmon

He’s probs had a crush on you for years and when you get together- you’re like the only person who would even consider him as a potential partner (in his mind)

Especially with how people treated him

Gradually he does get comfortable again, I mean at one point you guys were friends and he was really open about everything

Well eventually it gets to that point again

Just that this time whenever he’s being bold, he turns to you all bashful and turns back away and continues rambling

He’s really stupid but in an endearing way

Naruto is obviously pretty strong, head on and stubborn- we all know that

So imagine some idiot bumping into you and spilling all your stuff

Well Naruto ain’t letting it slide and confronts the person

Whatever stage of life you guys are at, this will go sorta different

Yet weirdly the same-

If you guys are younger, like when team 7 is still the og team 7

Then he’d be stubborn and be really confrontational- going as far as insulting the person and ordering them to help pick your stuff up (whether they do it or not- I can’t say)

If you’re older/mid teens then he’s the same honestly 😭

No matter what he’d still have this “dumb” air around him and don’t think I’m saying it as a bad thing

Because it really is endearing

He’ll always have your back

This was all to say that he’s pretty protective of you

Not when it comes to fighting all that much cuz you probably have it covered (though he’d still be there)

But mostly just when someone disrespects you

Also he’s so sweet

He’ll try to bring you traditional gifts like chocolates or substitute that with something else you like

He’ll always present it to you bashfully and hope that you’ll accept

Despite the fact that you’re literally with him?? Hello?

Also please just indulge him when going to Ichiraku ramen for dates or lunch

Most times he does try to make it up to you if you don’t like those types of dates

Also when it comes to affection, it does take a while for him to fully accept it

He’d definitely be surprised by it and fluster a bit

Eventually he does like physical affection- quite a lot actually

He’ll specifically scout you out for a hug or even to ruffle his hair

Just do it, we all know how touch starved he is

Jealousy wise I’d imagine two different scenarios too

The first is that it’s super obvious that he’s jealous 😭

It’s all over his face and he’s being mean (?) to the person that’s all over you (or not, maybe just someone attractive that’s around you a lil too much)

He’d be pouting too

During this time Sakura or any onlookers at all really, would tell him to cut it out cuz of his more than obvious attitude (second hand embarrassment 4 them)

He’d be sort of immature too

Mocking the person and wondering if they’re really better than him

This is all obvious to you so you’d probably be the first to bring it up

Not that Naruto is bad at communication just that he didn’t think of it

The other way he acts is not jealous- that’s only because he’s oblivious to the other persons advances on you

So he’d be all chill w this person and nice and stuff

And this person is just confused on why blud is okay with it 😭

Sakura Haruno

She’s literally the best person to date ever

She’s also really shy when you start dating

Not like she’s afraid to be affectionate because she really does want to be, but sometimes she gets a bit bashful at the idea

When she decides to be bold and hold your hand or even goes for a hug -

If you even slightly tease her she’ll definitely give you a serving of her iconic punch- straight to the face too 😭

Scratch that, she’ll throw an uppercut

Despite this comedic scene, once you hug her back she’ll feel touched and it just becomes a sweet moment for the two of you

Most moments with her tend to follow the same pattern as above

Gift wise she’ll definitely be the type of person to make you sweet home made stuff or even goes as far as buying treats or stuff she knows you’ll enjoy

Shed be flustered when she gives it to you and maybe a bit tsundere if Naruto or Ino is there to tease her for it

She’d likely give it to you later in the evening when she knows you’re not too busy

Despite the fact that you’re lit together

And that’s when she gives it to you

The only way to react is being overjoyed at the gift and hugging her or giving her some affection, I don’t make the rules

And if you decide for this to be your first kiss? Inner sakura would definitely be there totally pumped up while irl she’s acting all like a “shy” girl 😭

After having been walked home by you and closed the front door, she would definitely celebrate the new achievement

Now when it comes to what Sakura expects of you, just be the bare minimum

I swear I can’t emphasize this enough, just be a decent person

Even though we all know she deserves more

Make sure to gift her stuff in return too, not just lousy stuff but something you know she’ll cherish

Doesn’t even have to be expensive just something you know she’ll like, even then it wouldn’t hurt for it to have been costly

She’s always thinking of you too

You’re on her mind literally every waking hour

She walks home after a busy day and walks by a stall/store window and sees something you might like? She figures it wouldn’t hurt to buy it

She’s deciding what to eat? She’ll go out of her way to get something you can both share/ something of bigger portion just to have an excuse to sit with you

Not even something she has to do since her presence alone is a gift

She’s so beautiful too

And when you tell her, either by just slipping up because you were too entranced by her- she’ll be super flustered and try to play it off as a joke or you being “weird”

She’ll definitely go to sleep thinking about it though

Twirling her hair and kicking her feet and all

Eventually dates are in order

I won’t lie, Sakura would definitely want you to take her out first

She’s not even opposed to taking you out for a meal and paying either

She just prefers for you to first

Whether it’s for reassurance or preference- well it’s really unclear

Anyways, you end up taking her to a nice restaurant with plenty of choices

She doesn’t mind if it’s a small or quiet one either

Just as long as it’s with you

I do think Sakura would be the jealous type, try to hide it, but then fail miserably

Let me explain

Let’s say a person comes up to you- or even someone you’re assigned to protect is being awfully flirty

Well she’ll be as calm as she can be but it’s so obvious with her harsh actions that she’s fuming

Inner Sakura definitely shows that too

She doesn’t blame it on you or anything so that’s good but she’d still be pissed

It’s super funny too because Naruto would be terrified of interacting with her because then she’ll just take it out on him

And Sai? Yea he doesn’t gaf, he’ll still approach her

Even if it ends in him be wrangled and Naruto joining in

Naruto just because he was nearby*

This behavior doesn’t stop until the person leaves

Afterwards Sakura just doesn’t like the person at all 😭

Sasuke Uchiha

Og nonchalant

Or not???

Really depends with him because he sort of has mood swings

On one hand he’s really focused on his goal of restoring his clan and yknow the whole Itachi bit

(Not really a mood swing)

But he can’t deny that you’ve captured his heart

Plus, with him and his behavior- you’re likely super stubborn or hella in love

Probably both

I mean you’re already dating at this point but nothing really changes much

He’s pretty straightforward but with information that’s private- he keeps it that way

It’s pretty sad (?) in a way

At first it could definitely come off as him not liking you point blank

But when you really think about it you know that can’t be the case

You’re like the only person he’s ever even slightly been nice to

Honestly I’d believe it if you’re the only one amongst the Konoha residents that has seen sasuke laugh or smile

Up to a certain point)

He may be cold and distant but he doesn’t mean to be

He realizes that too the more you go into your relationship

So he tries not to be so emotionally constipated and tries to show you in subtle ways that, yes, he actually does care

Quite a lot honestly

Not really subtle though because it’s a stark difference between how he normally acts

By the time sasuke has the courage to hold your hand- it’s by the time where couples would normally have been doing much more

Honestly really depends when you date him too

Because if your relationship starts at teams 7 era

No it didn’t, he’s too clouded by getting revenge to actually act on it

Maybe, just maybe during shippuden

Even then he’s extremely difficult and hard to be around sometimes

And if you’re together, his behavior could definitely be a dealbreaker and cause some fights in your relationship

Patience is definitely required if you wanna go down the sasuke route 😮‍💨

I know I said previously that sasuke is really distant for a good while even with you

but eventually, gradually, he does open up more

Like about his past, his motivations, private and more vulnerable stuff like that

Now without the angsty-ish hcs, interacting with sasuke affectionately also has varied reactions

More often than not he’ll be, what can best be described as, tsundere

You could try and hug him while he’s overthinking but he’ll just shrink away

- a reaction that shows you he doesn’t feel like being touched

Obviously it’s a boundary that’s respected by you but it could also cause you to feel upset too

Then, after he shrinks away you look up to him

more specifically his face

Immediately you can see blush dusted on his cheeks

He gets easily flustered by interactions like this, I mean I can’t even imagine how touch starved he is

Now comes the rare occasion where he’s fine with it

Even leans into your touch

It’s pretty rare but sometimes he’s just exhausted and craves your touch

What can I say

Jealousy wise he’s terrible

He’s extremely jealous but tries to act like he isn’t bothered by what’s happening at all

Might even distance himself even more from you if he feels jealous

Could even spiral to him overthinking and feeling like his attachment to you is a weakness

Which quickly disappears because then he goes over to you and yanks you away from the person in question

Also did I forget to mention? DONT TEASE HIM

I can emphasize this enough

Hugging him for the first time in a while and he accepts? Don’t say anything

Same with this

I know people usually like to tease their partners with “awww you’re jealous?” But that’s just antagonizing him

Causes him to trust you less too so a definite ‘not’

Also extremely possessive over you

Like he’s usually hostile to others for no reason but if you’re being targeted then he’s definitely pissed off

Especially if someone thinks they can even try to make moves on you

Definitely takes a lot of patience but just dont pity him I guess (?) 😭

If you’re caring or try to be sympathetic with him he’ll mistake it for pity so yea

He gets more comfortable as the relationship becomes more serious

[anghraine]

I finished TOS today :'(

From J's loathing of the series finale, I thought it would be worse tbh. It is not good, to be clear! Obviously the whole conceit of the episode is intensely misogynistic (and transphobic, though I think that was less intentional) and Janice is so completely identified with Gender while also being so mediocre that her characterization is somewhere between insulting and comically stupid, but with a bit of generosity there are some things I can find intriguing about it.

For instance, Janice's rage over Kirk leaving her for his career only for Kirk to be like "actually I left you because your internalized misogyny was incredibly off-putting" is phrased in a deeply cringy 60s way. Yet, J and I have both found this to be basically true IRL. Self-hating misogynistic women do make for terrible relationships and Janice is at Lady Macbeth levels of it.

I also found it interesting that Janice (in the body of Kirk) is so sneeringly mocking of the idea that a woman could possibly have physically gotten the better of a man, when the reality is that a) she knows perfectly well (as does the audience) that this is exactly what happened, and b) this has happened to Kirk numerous times before (I think on at least four unrelated occasions in this season alone).

On just an acting level, I guiltily enjoyed Shatner's performance of Janice body snatching Kirk apart from a few specific scenery chewing moments. There's this blend of his usual Kirk performance with hints that something isn't right that get stronger and stronger until he's such an obvious monster that all the crew except security are refusing to follow blatantly unethical orders and actively trying to use Starfleet protocols that allow them to remove a superior officer (it's a surprisingly good episode for Sulu and Chekov because of this, as well as for the ever-reliable Spock).

The earlier phases of Shatner-as-Janice-imitating-Shatner-as-Kirk have this kind of almost-but-not-quite-right uncanny quality that I thought was actually pretty well done. It's rather better than the guest actor's performance of Kirk-stuck-in-Janice's-body until she really gets going.

So, like, there's this wild moment when Janice is sweet-talking the awful doctor into helping her commit murder, and it's clearly coded as, you know, the evil tempting ways of women as Janice leans in both kind of seductively and kind of menacingly. But Janice is performed by Shatner throughout the entire scene, so it's ... uhh. Well. A lot.

Meanwhile, Kirk-trapped-in-a-lady-body is trying to prove that he is Kirk to Spock, who is basically willing to entertain the possibility but not at all certain. I was half-jokingly telling J, "I feel like a mind meld could solve a lot of problems here" when Kirk did suggest a mind meld with Spock via the incredible line "You are closer to the captain than anyone in the universe. You know his thoughts" which UHHHHHH and then Spock does mind meld with Kirk and is immediately convinced that this really is Kirk, but Kirk is played by a woman the whole time, so. Hmm. Plausible deniability?

I'm honestly reminded a little of my Shakespeare class's discussion of how Twelfth Night would have registered to audiences at the time, when Viola would be played by a boy pretending to be a woman pretending to be a man. It's complicated. Obviously this bad episode is no Twelfth Night, but ... well.

I do also appreciate that the episode takes a very strong "just following orders is not an excuse" position, as does virtually everyone on the Enterprise except the security people. If the usual female cast members were more present, I think the gender stuff wouldn't feel as bad, tbh—I don't recall seeing Uhura at all, Chapel is hesitant but goes along with basically everything, the random woman on the bridge is just kind of scared where the men simply refuse to comply...

The conclusion is also just ambiguous enough to read the way I'm choosing to read it, which I feel is absolutely not what was intended, lol.

For context, a lot of Actual Janice's unhinged rage is driven by a mixture of what seems to be a very real glass ceiling in Starfleet + a distinctly authoritarian approach to power (J and I have long joked about half the cast of Mass Effect whining about "red tape" and we started going "RED TAPE!!!" as Janice transparently fumed about operating within an organization in which authority figures are actually answerable to other people and regulations exist around institutional power) + A Woman Scorn'd misogynistic tropes.

After Kirk and Janice are restored to their respective bodies and Janice is led away by the doctors, Kirk says, "I didn't want to destroy her."

Spock's last line in the show is his reply: "I'm sure we all understand that, captain."

Kirk responds, "Her life could have been as rich as any woman's, if only..."

And that's the end of the episode! And the show! And I was like "as any woman's, yeah, but she didn't want to only have the opportunities available to women, which is entirely fair even if she individually sucks." But since Kirk just trails off and wanders sadly away, there's no clarification of what "if only" refers to. I would guess that the writers intended something more like "if only she'd been happy with her place as a woman" or whatever, but I'm choosing to live in a world where it's more like this was a perfect storm of about five different factors and not specifying lets him wave vaguely at all of them rather than attributing her actions to any single cause.

Regardless, I'm sad to leave TOS behind. For all its warts (the godawful handling of nearly all female characters comes from barely ten years before Princess Leia blasted her way into cultural consciousness; the writing and direction is wildly erratic in quality; the characterization sometimes wobbles to serve the plots; etc), I've really loved it. I'm very fond of so many of the characters and feel I know them despite the wobbling. I love how the show uses color in such a vivid way (even accounting for tech changes that affect this, like the lighting making green command uniforms look gold), I love the willingness to try different things with angles, effects, light, stages, whatever. I love the worldbuilding-as-we-go that gradually coalesces into something familiar. I love the way it's episodic enough to watch in any order but kind of builds on itself nevertheless (it feels very right for "Amok Time" to long precede "Journey to Babel," for instance).

I even enjoy the glaring-to-a-modern-eye staginess. I'm so tired of glossy de-saturated sci-fi aesthetics that TOS being like "fuck it, let's try X" whether it succeeds or not is just very welcome. I've loved checking out different costumes, hairstyles, various little details that make it feel real in a larger (and brighter) than life way. RIP to TOS from the future: nobody's doing it like you.

[gothushi]

nikolai and/or Astarion…period feeding…both of you being constantly satisfied, you from the orgasms and him from the feeling of being full…

im going to literally faint.

this goes for both of them, but theyll totally be down for this, it’s one of their favorite things

nikolai just loves pampering you, loves to take care of you. so when you aren’t feeling well, he despises it. any sign of an ache or pain and he’s got this instinctual need to protect and soothe that makes him almost physically hurt if he can’t help. so ur poor cramps, ur back aching, ur muscles weak and sore, it all makes him pout a bit, makes him coo and pet over u and shush u as he makes u lay down.

he’d probably have a bunch of nice soft blankets down, muttering about not worrying about a mess, just relax. he’s got a little nest made up, and it absolutely reeks of u in the best way. (oh yeah, he loves tht ur scent is stronger on ur period btw) will make sure ur comfy as can be, maybe even has a heating pad/hot water bottle on ur front, behind ur back. keeps ur legs over his shoulders so ur not laying flat, easing ur back pain some. and ughhgf he just goes to town. he’s very gentle though, obviously ur sore and achey and it actually took quite a bit to even get u horny in the first place. his hands stay on ur hips and thighs, rubbing and kneading the soft flesh whilst he peppers little kissies all over. tries to build it up in a more romantic, intimate way but the smell of u is making his dick so hard it hurts, leaking, and his eyes are going out of focus here and there. so eventually he dives in. goes slow, moans like a pornstar against ur clit because good god is this the best thing he’s ever experienced, or what? it’s like his tongue has gained the sentience of his hands and is massaging you in ways u didnt know cld feel good. all the while he’s getting that delicious slick snd cum mixed with your blood. he gets greedier as time goes on, eating u out more fervently. he can feel his mood lightening, his body becoming satisfied not only with making u feel good but the feeding itself. makes him feel strong, fast. gets more growly and huffy against ur cunt too, drooling a bit but making sure to get every last drop on his tongue.

likes to flatten his tongue over ur hole and feel u physically leak onto him, makes him moan lewdly whilst his eyes roll from the taste and the rush he gets from it before moving back up to suckle at ur clit so u can cum again. will not be shy about parting ur thighs more and using his thumbs to spread ur cunt open, holding ur aching lips apart so he can get every last drop.

astarion my beloved boy. he’s also one who just gets so mad when u don’t feel good. like, he wants to make it better instantly, hates to see u suffer like that even if it’s a minor thing. if ur still traveling with the others, he takes over ur duties and stuff so u can just rest under a tree in the shade, curled up with scratch taking a nap. kinda the same if u’ve both settled down in a home too, does the chores u normally do, insists that u rest and stay where u are, keep reading ur book i’ve got dinner under control. very fussy this man is. again, probably enjoys a good nest. wants u to be comfortable so he finds what position u feel best in. i think he’d be the same in like .. going slow at first, more gentle and romantic turning more passionate and needy eating u out.

sharp fangs graze ur skin on either side of ur clit, his tongue peaking out to lap up a bit of slick. gets a taste of u and has to physically hold back whimpering between ur thighs. soooo many compliments too, cooing and soothing u sweetly between sucks, licks, laps. ranging from how good u taste, how sweet u smell to him, to how amazing and strong u make him feel from feeding. it boosts his ego to have u whining and crying, grabbing his hair and feeling unbelievably pleasured. he feels happier, stronger just as nikolai does when feeding. practically makes out w ur pussy, and unlike nikolai, astarion is a bit of a messy eater. he nvr used to be until u came along.. has blood and slick and cum smeared on his chin, coating his fingers because he can’t resist stretching u out some, suckling the mess off his digits with a huffed noise.

[ryuichirou]

I know you don’t write anything with Yuu/OCs, they’re included but not as the main. Sorta a warning.

how do you think the boys would react to a partner (Yuu/oc/other canon character) who DOESN’T masturbate or watch porn? Given that it’s slightly agreed upon that boys in an all boys school is absolutely getting off, what’s the reaction to the like one guy who isn’t?

I’ll also add another note, the partner isn’t ace or lacking sexual attraction, they just choose to not do that.

Guess what, a hc post today!

This ask is insanely old, one of the oldest ones that are currently in our askbox, and I really wonder if the person who asked it is still here, but if they are: thank you for being patient, for asking and for enjoying our stuff. I am sorry it took this long, and sorry to everyone else who’s been waiting for months…

But enough of me apologising, let’s talk about this ask! As you already mentioned, we don’t really do Yuu/OC stuff, so I wrote in a way that was easier for me: by mentioning our specific ships. I hope that’s okay with you.

And just like you stated, the person in question isn’t ace, so I am not touching this particular aspect at all in this post.

Anyways, let’s roll…

Riddle – obviously, he isn’t surprised, in fact ,he is almost offended that it’s presented like it’s a big and shocking thing. This is just the right thing to do to him – why would anyone want to masturbate or watch porn anyway? Why would anyone desire physical intimacy until marriage? Sounds highly inappropriate to him! I feel like Riddle would probably get shocked if he heard that his potential partner does masturbate or watch porn… especially if it’s someone he has some respect for, like Trey, for example.

Ace – “Yeah, right! … Wait, for real?” type of reaction lol I feel like he is someone who would instantly start asking a lot of questions, trying to figure out why wouldn’t someone who doesn’t lack sexual attraction watch porn or jerk off. He would instantly start teasing, egging his partner on; if he is feeling especially douchey, he might even tell everyone about it. Is it because he himself watches so much porn that this is the only way he can process not wanting to watch it? Maybe. Anyway, he broke Deuce’s “no watching porn and no jerking off” streak once like this. If it’s serious though, he might accept it after a certain point. Not with Deuce though, he can’t let Deuce feel like he’s better than him…

Deuce – surprised, but also a little embarrassed about himself. He would feel like this is very inspiring, but also very humbling – he could never manage to not masturbate for longer than a couple of days… He is a mix of insecurity and supportiveness. If someone like Jack states that he doesn’t do such things, Deuce would feel such a strong urge to also stop doing that, even if he isn’t asked to, just because it feels weird to do it when his partner doesn’t. It’s like it’s cheating somehow if only one of them does it. He is a bit of a mess… very conflicted young man that overthinks it a lot.

Trey – if it’s someone like Riddle, he’s not surprised at all. A tiiiiny little bit concerned, but not surprised: he is actually smart enough to know that it’s not absolutely mandatory to masturbate or watch porn to even be healthy, but for some reason he also frames it as “well those people are special/their own kind, I’m just a normal guy” in his head.

Cater – his reaction would be similar to Ace’s, but he wouldn’t be as much of a douche about it. When Ace starts asking questions, it’s obvious that even though he is shocked, he is kind of mocking or at least teasing, but Cater has more curiosity…or is it nosiness?? Anyway, he could get somewhat obnoxious about it, but he isn’t super close with anyone to the point of having an actual opinion. To each their own?? I guess.

Leona – he couldn’t care less; as someone who is too lazy to jerk off a lot of times, he isn’t completely shocked that there are people who aren’t into it. He would get sooomewhat surprised if it’s someone from his own dorm though, like Jack or Ruggie; he might tease the latter a little bit for that. What, are you storing sperm now? Are you planning on donating it later? But nothing more than that.

Ruggie – he does think that every single guy in NRC jerks off every now and then, so he would be mildly surprised to hear that someone doesn’t, and probably won’t believe them anyway lol But it’s not like he would care much. Even if it’s his partner, it’s none of his business, but if it’s Leona we’re talking about, Ruggie would think that he is just trying to stay pent up until they have sex… or that he is that lazy that even jerking his wiener is too much work for him at this point.

Jack – his reaction would be somewhat similar to Deuce’s; he would probably be slightly surprised, but then impressed, and then somewhat embarrassed of himself. It really might urge him to stop masturbating himself; he already isn’t a huge fan of himself doing that, but his body is too demanding and causes him problems if he doesn’t jerk off every now and then… I guess that would make him want to have sex more often lol If Jack and Deuce decided to stop masturbating together, they’ll just end up hooking up endlessly.

Azul – he isn’t super into sex or masturbation, so he wouldn’t think it’s a big deal, UNLESS he really wants to use it as a leverage. For example, he might be a little bummed out that Jamil isn’t really interested in those things because now he can’t really use it against him…which is a bit messed up thing to even consider about your partner lol In general though, it’s even better for him if his partner doesn’t masturbate. He gets jealous and he is very controlling, so I can see him as the type to get kind of pissy that his partner masturbates… he is lucky that neither Jamil nor Idia really do that all that much…

Jade – it depends. In general, he really doesn’t care, so if it’s never mentioned, he won’t even think about it. But if his partner makes a point about it, then Jade is going to get interested. For example, if Idia states that he doesn’t really watch hentai for anything other than artistic value and doesn’t jerk off, that would automatically make Jade want to make him want to masturbate somehow. Maybe with cunningness, maybe with mushrooms, but he really wants to see what it takes to make that person reconsider, just because it sounds like a taunting, I mean challenge.

Floyd – same thing, but with a bit of a different flavour. Of course he’s going to want to make someone like Riddle (who is very righteous and principled about not masturbating) jerk off, of course he is going to bully him into that, of course he is going to have fun with it. It’s not like he cares all that much, but if it comes from a place of insecurity and he can sense that, he is going to take advantage of that.

Kalim – somehow… Kalim feels too wholesome to care. I think he is one of the people who would just think that it means that he and his partner would get to spend more time having fun together!! <3 Maybe it’s difficult to talk about Kalim because we only ship him with Jamil, and their situation is too unique… does he even think of Jamil as of someone who would masturbate? Does Kalim even think about those things at all?

Jamil – similarly to Kalim, he would think that no masturbation = more sex, but unlike Kalim, he would hate that lol For some reason, Jamil’s potential partners are all clingy and annoying, so he actually wouldn’t mind at all if someone like Kalim or Azul left him alone for a change and jerked off in their respective rooms. He might even encourage that, maybe even while acting all sweet and caring, secretly hoping that he would get some “me time” in return. He is such a good boyfriend, that Jamil <3

VIl – he respects personal choices like that, and he always tries to be very mature about it. He might get concerned if it’s with someone like Rook because Vil knows how he gets when he is pent up… but he would never really judge anyone for not masturbating or not watching porn. He would be very pleasantly tickled if his lover who doesn’t masturbate jerked off on his pictures though…

Rook – he wouldn’t get surprised because chances are, he is already aware lol He also doesn’t judge, and he finds abstinence to be romantic and poetic, even if it’s just a matter of “I’m not feeling it”. But he is also a strong believer of accumulating lust until the actual rendezvous. He and Vil are similar in this regard… but if it’s someone like Idia, who, once again, just doesn’t want to masturbate, I can see Rook being incredibly (sickly) sweet about it, which would still feel creepy somehow.

Epel – while hearing that from someone like Floyd and Rook would surprise him on many many many levels, even if he hears that from anyone else it would be somewhat surprising. He started jerking off even before he discovered porn… so not wanting to do that at all feels strange to him. He won’t make a big deal about it, but he might suddenly remember about it and ask questions similar to “but why?” or “not at all???” every now and then.

Idia – he believes that dating is overrated, sex is overrated, masturbation is overrated, but also Idia is still a gooner at heart, so abstinence from porn would probably prompt a discussion about how eroge and hentai are actually art and should be appreciated no matter what. Just in case. That being said, he doesn’t care about his partner not masturbating, until he remembers that the majority of his partner options are super horny guys, so them not masturbating for any reason would only mean that he is going to get more heat from them. Please feel free to jerk off more! It’s good for you! It really is!

Ortho – he also wouldn’t be surprised… but he will act surprised! He will play this “whaat, but don’t all boys masturbate???” card, even though he knows that it’s not true. He just really, really wanted to say this line, okay? Anyways, he’ll only comment on that if he feels like his partner’s vitals show that he needs to jerk off asap! But he’ll suggest his help in that case anyway~

Lilia – he should know better with how old he is and how many kinds of boys he’d seen, but he would still get surprised. The all-boys school setting is such a classic to him, and he knows that even the most pure and chaste ones still have dirty thoughts every now and then… Similarly to some other guys, he’ll play it as “aww, you can’t do it without me? It’s okay, I knew you’d get lonely <3”…

Silver – this boy doesn’t get why he should be surprised, so he probably wouldn’t be, but I have an inkling that he might say that the person should do it every now and then because otherwise you’d get sick. Where did he learn it from? Lilia, of course. But then he’d go “ah, but if we’re doing it anyway, it shouldn’t be a problem”. Where did he learn that from? Lilia again, of course.

Sebek – another one who would fully consider it a norm, but once again there is some nuance depending on who we’re talking about. If it’s Silver, then it’s “Of course you don’t, that would be disgraceful!”, while secretly seething a little bit because now he feels like Silver has the upper hand between the two of them, because Sebek himself is having a hard time holding back sometimes… And if it’s Malleus, then it’s “Of course my liege wouldn’t!! <3” but also simultaneously getting extremely embarrassed because now he can’t help but think about Malleus doing things to himself… If it’s someone like Idia though, he might actually gain some respect towards him because of that. Sebek’s mind works in interesting ways lol

Malleus – I don’t think he would care that much, frankly. It’s not like he is super into masturbating or watching porn himself, but he also is aware that this is something that is natural and expected – Lilia has taught him that. So he could be miiiildly surprised, but ultimately it just means that he and his partner would be more pent up when they’re together, right? At least in Malleus’ head, and that feels like a very good thing~ If it’s someone like Sebek though, I feel like Malleus would think that it would be beneficial for Sebek to masturbate every now and then – this boy is too pent up.

[blush-blush-imagines]

Reference from Brooklyn 99, how would some of the boys react if we just said "If I run and leap at (Name), he will most certainly catch me in his arms" and then proceeded to run full force at them while they're carrying stuff. (You can just ignore this if you don't understand this or don't want to do this.)

I was given 'some' and immediately ignored my own rules and did 'all', that's fun.

Still, finally cracking down and writing all *checks notes* 2 requests I've gotten.

(Please feel free to send in requests, I'd love to have more to work with)

Nimh

Oh it is such a rough thing for poor Nimh.

Problem A), the call alone is a little jump scare to him, and now his heart is freaking out

Problem B), he’s now faced with the dilemma of either dropping everything, or letting you eat shit on the pavement. He’d like neither to happen, but he’s not dumb enough to think he could do both

He eventually commits to catching you, but that just leads to

Problem C), he is not very strong and he can barely hold you

Give him the courtesy of keeping a foot on the ground to balance out your weight, yeah?

Volks

You joke about it sometimes before you ever commit to the bit

And every single time you do he insists to you that he will make zero effort to catch you

But you know Volks very well at this point.

And you know, among other things, that he is a dirty fucking liar

So you can only imagine your personal childlike glee when you finally do it and he does, in fact, catch you without hesitation 

He insists it’s because if you fell and like, broke your elbow or something, that’d be terrible. Medical bills and all that.

For his sake, you’re ignoring that his face is growing redder by the second. 

Kelby

No hesitation 100% of the time

First of all, holding you is extremely easy for him, but also he just finds carrying you to be romantic as hell

Oh he’ll cringe if he happens to be dropping something heavy, like a weight, but he still goes for you, that’s his priority

Still, he likes looking for opportunities to show off, and carrying you around like it’s nothing is prime show off material.

He might even get in a couple squats. He knows they go appreciated.

Eli

It’s a coin flip with Eli

Though if there’s a chance you’d genuinely injure yourself he’ll probably catch you

But it’s fair game to just let you crash if it’s carpet or grass. Because he thinks it’s just a little funny. 

He also occasionally makes you pay the ‘catch tax’ 

It’s 5 dollars to at least partially make up for the drink that just died on the ground for your goofs.

Anon

Really, shame on you, you should know better.

He makes no attempt to catch you

In fact, he finds the way you end up crashing into the wall kinda funny. 

Like watching a cat really fuck up a jump.

Beyond the fact that he’s kind of a stickler with his physical contact to begin with, a lot of the things he carries around are very easily breakable

So yes it’s rude, but frankly he’s not about to shell out 1000 dollars for a new laptop because you thought you could make a goofy point- because you couldn’t.

Garret 

Garret doesn’t even miss a beat

He’s got you held up in one arm and whatever it was he was holding cradled in the other

While he thinks that it was certainly an odd thing to do, it was pretty cute.

Not hard to do. He thinks most things you do are cute.

Gives you a little kiss and gently sets you back down

Don’t get overconfident though. If he’s holding an animal, the animal gets priority. They’re more fragile.

He still feels really bad about it though. You think he might cry

Dmitri 

Dmitri also goes for the catch every time

It adds to his suave and romantic charm, obviously.

However, as the type to prioritize romance over basic logic on occasion, he’s also prone to forgetting that he’s often holding his drink of choice

No it’s fine that his foot just got doused in hot coffee, no he’s not getting a third degree burn

Appreciate the romance, he’ll go see someone about it later

Ichiban

Like Anon, Ichiban hesitates, because if he’s holding something, it’s likely expensive. 

However, unlike Anon, he makes the fatal mistake of still trying to catch you

And it worked maybe once. He’s still riding that high though.

He can handle it!

…But also this case of shenanigans that he has never told you to stop doing has cost more in equipment that either of you are ready to admit out loud.

You may or may not have pitched in to replace several cameras, controllers, and lavaliers 

William

He tries very very hard to get you to stop charging him before contact is made

It’s a flurry of paperwork, because he does catch you

Says it’s the least he could do as the doting boyfriend he is

Though he does awkwardly dismiss himself from in after a moment. 

While carrying you around is quite romantic, he won’t disagree with that, but also those papers were kind of important and he should get those together ASAP. 

People have pets in need, and they can’t get it without the information getting where it needs to be.

He promises to give you a good cuddle once it’s all sorted, however.

Myx 

There’s a very direct correlation between what exactly he’s holding and how okay he is with dropping it to scoop you

Electronics? Hard no, those are pricey to replace

Instruments are also frequent victims, and it depends on its fragility.

He tried to catch you with his leg once, except all he actually did was end up kicking you in the gut on the way down

He apologized about it for fifteen minutes straight. 

But if it’s something sturdy, he has no problem with chucking it straight down and scooping you up into a whole ass cuddle. 

Stirling

Oh please don’t do that outside 

He’s fine with it inside and at night. It’s very attractive, even. Smooth and charming as he sweeps you off your feet before you can even make the jump.

But in the middle of the day it’s very bad for both of you

He can’t hold his parasol and you at the same time, it’s not happening 

So get ready to either hit the deck or get caught on fire with him, depending on how much time he gets to think about it

Scale

He screams at first

There’s a loud clatter of knives, but he’s got you!

Scale insists very hard that he did not shriek like a little baby at you almost impaling yourself on his knives

Instead he scolds you over it

I mean come on, you spent an entire afternoon to keep his assassination deadline on you years away

What’s the good in wasting that, he could’ve done better things with his afternoon if you were gonna die a couple months later anyway

Sven

Puts no thought into whatever he’s holding, he just tries to hold you on top of it

It’s very uncomfortable every time, why do you keep doing that

It also doesn’t register to him that it’s his need to multitask it that results in you injuring yourself

He starts doing it to you to prove a point, and thinks he’s doing it better because he doesn’t get hurt

He has not realized it’s because you actually drop everything to catch him

But it’s still fun, and you kinda don’t want to ruin it for him.

Cole 

He doesn’t even flinch

It’s like he anticipated you’d do this exact thing

And unlike some of the other boys he doesn’t even think when he drops whatever he’s holding. 

Unless it’s something on the more… incriminating side. At that point he dodges you, dodges any questions, and quickly dismisses himself from the conversation entirely.

Sure it’s entirely possible there’s a shattered plate of hot food at his feet now, but that doesn’t matter because you’re here, being contently held in his arms

He uses it as an excuse to keep holding you

Poe

It what fucking world do you think he could hold you?

He drops his coffee and his school papers

Luckily they don’t damage each other, but w o w that was a close call

But beyond losing his morning caffeine and having to gather his work back up, you’ve hurt his wrists and also your entire body

No one has won here.

He also just. Literally can’t hold you. He’s a tiny frail goth boy, he crumbles if he’s holding anything heavier than 20 pounds. 

Once you’re back on your feet, he asks if you could at the very least help him gather up his papers. They’re worth like 20% of his grade. 

Cashew

Already a bit on the twitchy side, when he notices you speeding like a bullet train, he squeaks.

What exactly do you think you’re doing??? He’s been relocating his books all afternoon, you can see that he’s holding like, 8.

But, visibly cringing, they hit the floor, because he knows that he can’t hold them and you at the same time

One of them falls wide open, pages down. He tries not to think of the potential folded pages and boxed corners. 

Especially because of how pleased you look!

…But the second he can set you down he’s on the ground checking for damages.

Seth

Seth is the absolute king of the ‘casually carrying around hazardous objects’ club

But unlike everyone else in said club, he has no qualms about chucking whatever it is on the ground and scooping you up. 

This has resulted almost unanimously in making more hazards and chaos, but he hasn’t fussed about it once

He gets to give you a lil snuggle and it has the potential to cause crime. It’s a win-win for him!

You are an accessory to arson now though, so watch out, yeah?

Logan

Man goes into bullet time

It’s just a race to him to see if he can free an arm before you inevitably ‘plink’ off him and crash into the floor

Like. He does it, no real problems

But he immediately sets you down and scolds you for it

Because that was dangerous! What if he got hurt? What if you got hurt? What if he was holding something breakable, or bringing his fire axe somewhere?

All of those sound awful! 

Still, he ruffles your hair and plants a little kiss on the top of your head. He isn’t mad, he just wants to make sure you’re being safe.

[dearweirdme]

Hi anon who sent me an essay.

I'm not gonna post your whole ask, because it's clear you have not spend any time reading my blog. Most of your ask does not apply to me, and it does not apply to many of my followers, so please go and send stuff like that to places it does apply to.

There is one part of it I'd like to adress though, because you are pretty wrong about it, so let's go through that part together for a bit.

Through out the years, Jimin and Jk have found solace in each other. They’ve depended on each other and been there for each other.

Yes, as have all members. I agree that Jm and Jk have established a great bond. You are however mistaken if you think they do not share that closeness with others. Jimin and Hobi, Jimin and Yoongi, Jimin and Tae... all very strong bonds. All very evidently strong, and Jimin has even mentioned and specified those bonds as being special and important to him. Namjoon 'Hoseok is always nr 1 to Jimin'. Jimin who knows Yoongi will always pick him. Tae and Jimin being soulmates. Jk and Tae (shiping aside), Jk and Namjoon, Jk and Hobi, Jk and Jin. All very strong bonds, and all persons Jk finds strenth, comfort and solace in. All members have their preferences amongst members for different things I believe. I agree that Jm and Jk are close and share a lot of time together. They have found solace in each other, but they are not the only ones they find solace in.

Jimin has always been the first one to run to Jungkook when he felt Jk needed him (but i honestly cannot say this about Tae towards Jk). Jk has always run to Jimin first when he wasn’t ok.

You are being very selective here, and also very dependend on situations we have seen. And more importantly... you are presuming to know exactly when Jk wasn't feeling okay. What you do here, is take a few easily identifiable moments in which something happened and it was obvious that Jk was feeling off. You do not take into account that Jk's feeling off (and this goes for all members really) was probably not always showing (at least not in full force). I think all members probably had many moments in which they had to "act" as though they were fine. It is actually my believe that for some of their 'tougher' moments Tae and Jk were actually seeted together, or joined each other more. Festa 2022 for instance, Mama 2018 was striking, Golden Disk 2020, the 2020 Grammys. You take some moments when they were physically unwell and take that as evidence of them always running to only each other, yet you fail to realize that physically unwell can perhaps be less impactfull than being mentally unwell. Being mentally unwell does not always obviously show though.. so how do we know? How can we place any value at all on which member they go to first when feeling unstable if we are probably not even always able to identify when that unstableness occurs.

They have always in their own way protected each other and been there for each other when it mattered the most. Emphasis on “mattered the most”.

See the above. Your "in their own way" and your "mattered the most" are your thoughts about this, not actual factual thoughts.

This isn’t about going snowboarding or together, or going for concerts, or being cuddly, or hugging each other at concerts while vibing to songs.

Sure.

With Jimin and Jk, it’s always been them two showing how much they value each other by showing for each other when it MATTERED. Jk falling on his back during AHL, Jimin being the first one to run to him and tell him he was cool.

Okay.. what does this say about the relationship between other members when they react when someone falls down?

Jk crying about missing his mom, jimin being the one who finds him and tells him it is ok to cry. Jk being sad and going to the bar alone, jimin being the only one who realizes that jk is not around and goes looking for him. Jk feeling sick and collapsing after concerts, Jimin being the one who doesn’t leave his side. Jk choosing to spend a majority of his downtime with Jimin (nights). Jk choosing to give only Jimin a birthday present until he is called out by the other members. Jk doing things for Jimin that he doesn’t do for anyone else.

Again selective. BTS members care and take care of each other. Jk cries easily, Jimin to a lesser degree as well. They get comfort more often in general because of that. I have a few examples for you to ponder on.. Jm comforting Tae when he cried on and off stage and in Bon Voyage Malta. Members taking care of Jin when he had his hand injury. Tae drying Jk's tears. Jk clinging to Tae as soon as he arrived in BV season 1. Jk wanting to be roommates with Tae at their house. They all (!) comfort each other, if those moments you mention mean something.. then what makes them different from all other moments (and there's plenty!).

Jk himself saying that Jimin is the one who knows him the best. Jk himself saying that Jimin gives him the best comfort. This isn’t about looks, skinship, or friendly hangout (the things u taekookers hang unto to prove ur ship).

Ah, anon! You're talking about quotes from 2014/15 here. It very much shows how Jm was being a hyung to him. That says nothing about how their relationships evolved from then. They were also very clear about Tae being the person who helped Jk out of his shell, which is not something to be ignored, since that takes a lot of trust and closeness. You will find that members' answers will vary from time to time. From various instances though, it becomes clear that Tae and Jk do have a knowledge about each other that other members do not. The other members were for instance not aware about the text Yoongi sent to Jk and Tae.. but Tae and Jk did know about them getting that text. Tae and Jk know more about details in their lives, like Jk knowing exactly how tall Tae is and correcting Jm. Like Jk knowing Tae had his nails done. Like Tae being able to easily summ up things Jk likes. Like Jk knowing Tae's favorite food and whether he has beer in his fridge.

This is about Jimin and Jungkook being each other’s number one person when it matters most. They have proven this time and time and time again but y’all continue to look away. Y’all look away from the fact that at those moments when it really matters, Jimin and Jungkook just somehow find themselves at each other’s side ALWAYS!

You don't get to decide which moments matter most. They are importnt to each other, I absolutely agree, but there certainly is no ALWAYS! at play here.

Jk will choose to play games with V, will choose to interact with him more on stage, will cling to him during concerts, will seemingly smile at him more, but at the end of the day, Jk will choose to spend hours on end in Jimin’s room.

Again a selective use of moments. Just because it is mentioned that Jk hangs out in Jm's room doesn't mean that's what always happens. They are talking about a specific period, so you should use this moment only when it comes to taht specific period as well.

At the end of the day, Jimin is the one who Jk will openly sit his ass down for, for hours watching and missing. At the end of the day, Jimin is the one Jungkook will gravitate to when he is done goofing around with his friend and bandmate. If you don’t get this by now, i’m afraid you never will.

Ofcourse I never will, because it is just not true and evidently so. I very often hear that Jm and Jk treat each other differently... I think the only way in which they do, is that they spend more time together than they do with other members (except Tae). So there are more moments of them together, which to some (jkkrs) makes it seem like they're in a relationship (quantity above quality). But when you look at the way they act with others (quality) there is not actually that much of a difference. Jm will hug and comfort anyone. He is physically close with many members.

Jk will cuddle easily with Hobi, Jm and Tae. He is an emotional person, so he needs comfort often.. and many members will give him that. Jm being one of the main comfort givers, and also his close friend, means it will often be Jm.

So where do Tae and Jk differ? Tae and Jk though do treat each other different from other members. I have not seen Tae talk about any member as often as he does about Jk and I have not seen Tae touch any member the way he touches Jk. Tae touching Jk is exploring, calming, it's long in daration, it's intimate, it's without it meaning to be playfull or edgy or funny. Jimin does not touch Jk the way Tae does, and neither does Jk let anyone else touch him like that. When Jm and Jk touch there will very often be with a humorous undertone. Their moments are shorter in duration. You will see Tae and Jk basically hang on each other for minutes.. but Jk and Jm less. Those moments are usually shorter. When Tkkrs talk about Taekook no space couple... it's because Tae and Jk do sit next to each other more closely than Jk and Jm do (in general). Jkkrs also say this about Jk and Jm, but when you compare those moments they're different. It's posing for pictures, it's standing aside each other. It's not the relaxing into eachother Tae and Jk do. So look for the quality of moments and not the quantity. Jk will way more often search for where Tae is than he will with any other member. Even when Jm hangs of him, Jk will often focus on Tae (I cannot proof this though, because there simply is too much footage in general). Jk leans into Tae's touches and will usually not pull away, with Jm he does though (not in a "I hate it way" just in a "I need my personal space" way).

Jk does not look at Jm like he does at Tae. We've talked about this live (watch at 9:17), but that stare lasts 6 seconds! People brush past this so easily, but 6 seconds is super long to stare in someone's eyes. Seriously try staring directly into someones eyes for 6 seconds and see how that makes you feel.

The ease with which Tae and Jk get physically close without even flinching is really something.

(excuse the edit, I'm lazy today). I have no explanation for Tae and Jk at Dream premiere. Jk's flustered nervousness, Tae's pride... the way they look at each other... this was a moment for them, and I cannot come up with a platonic reason for why that would be.

All of the above is so much more than anything between Jm and Jk. And it's not like these moments are the only ones like this, it's an ongoing thing throughout many years.

[0perfectimperfections0]

Yo, I know I might be one of many people who ask this but I was wondering. Will get any lore expansion on the Everett family in the book you’re working on? I’m asking because the family has me really intrigued, especially Greyson. I know he’s one heck of a jerk, to say the least, but he’s a rather interesting jerk and I want to know more about him. I especially want to know how on earth he became that way despite his father, Henry, being quite a decent person, at least upon first impressions. I don’t expect any spoilers, though. I know you might want to save that for later. I just confirmation on when we can expect to see more of the Everett’s. Hope to hear from you soon! Keep up the great work!

You're actually the first person to ask about the Everett family. Which isn't surprising to me since I didn't make them a main focus point for the first book. The second book, "Blind Stitch", will give them more screen time like chapter 5 does, but most of the lore for Greyson Everett will be revealed through my Shell-Shock series.

It's just a matter of trying to figure out how to incorporate said lore into the Stitch series, because I really want to.

Greyson Everett is different as far as antagonists go, and I intentionally made it that way. He doesn't necessarily have trauma, he hasn't been abused, he wasn't set to unrealistic expectations, none of that.

Greyson's grandpa used to work at the World Trade Center (twin towers) and died when 9/11 took place. Yes, 9/11 will have an impact on the Stitch series and Shell-Shock, so if any of you are uneasy about that bit, consider this your warning. There won't be flashbacks or anything like that, just a general explanation of why Greyson initiated Henry's idea to start a doll company and why Louis exists.

The reason I don't have Greyson as a victim of trauma or anything like that is because of the way I have him treat Lou. Greyson is obviously abusive to him both physically and psychologically. And the message I'm getting through with that is that generational abuse and trauma have to start somewhere.

Greyson simply has strong political and world views, shaped by his family upbringing and 9/11, that drive him to simply believe that the way he treats Lou is the only proper way.

Not everyone that is abusive needs a tragic backstory, because it has to start somewhere. Some people are just cruel and don't deserve the "I was abused" card, and that's the hidden message I'm writing within the series.

As such, Greyson won't have a redemption arc or anything of that nature.

For background (I don't know how much you noticed in chapter 5 of Blind Stitch) but they live in Georgia. I can't remember the specific city, but the Everett's and the factory are located there.

I also did research on the actual UglyDolls line and that's how I built the rest of my fictional world around the factory. It originally was established February 14th of 2001, just months prior to 9/11.

In my story, Henry is the one that founded the company itself and was making it for the purpose of creating and producing dolls. He made sketches of potential doll designs, and Greyson helped him with most of the work.

Technical stuff aside, the first dolls weren't actually conscientious (alive). The first actual prototype couldn't walk or talk or any of that.

It wasn't until after 9/11 (spoilers so I won't go into detail) that Greyson started a secret operation that Henry didn't know about to create the microchips that would bring the prototypes alive. And this in turn would mean the regular dolls would be sentient as well.

I swear it makes sense once you know the full plan 😂 right now it probably sounds chaotic, and it kinda is. But I've got some sound plot based on my research of programming, AI, and all that stuff.

There are fictional elements to these stories, obviously, but a lot of the specific information I use is actual sound research.

Yes, I spent like 2 hours researching the step-by-step process of how to make a microchip 😂 which is why in my short story "Reunited" is really long. All that information he tells the dolls about their microfibers, microchips taking 4 months to make, all that stuff, that was research.

And the light colours are also accurate, but not specifically for when something is learned. Microchips are made out of silicon, which can be multiple colours, but whichever colour it starts out as affects what colour it ends up being after being exposed to light or thermal annealing.

I still have to do more research on it, but the reason why Lou's eyes are blue ties in with his microchip and the colours that are reflected when the microchip is exposed to light.

https://opg.optica.org/oe/fulltext.cfm?uri=oe-22-25-31545&id=306286

The above link is for those of you that want to read through an example of one of the many articles I use to attain this information, but don't feel pressured to 😂

Anyway, I'll stop rambling. I have to go to class anyway.

[velvet-gloom]

Persona Ships and a Moment in a Thunderstorm

These are just some ships I like, no hate to your favorite if I leave it out. This unedited textpost was getting pretty long anyway so I’ll probably just do another one eventually

Ren and Makoto: The storm hits in the evening while Makoto is at Leblanc with Ren, and it’s bad enough that he absolutely refuses to let her walk home (the call to Sae is awkward, but she does agree it’s better for Makoto to stay put). They throw on some old kung-fu movies in Ren’s room and she grabs him for safety every time there’s an especially loud crack of thunder (she’s totally not scared though, how dare he think that). Then the power briefly goes out and she clings to him so tight he’s convinced he broke a rib. The next morning, Makoto wakes up early and puts her time as Ren’s kitchen assistant on their roadtrip to use, making him coffee and breakfast as a thank-you and a reminder that it’s okay to have his friends do nice things for him for a change.

Aigis and Makoto (P3 Makoto, obviously): The storm wakes Makoto up sometime around 2 or 3 in the morning, and he goes downstairs to stretch his legs a little, even if it’s just to walk around the first floor. Aigis is down there, looking out the window at the storm and thinking to herself. Makoto doesn’t say anything, he just sits next to her and shares the moment until she asks what the sensation of rain falling on you is like. He racks his brain for a good answer before giving up and just saying “wet” with a shrug. Aigis talks about how that’s another thing she never would have wondered about before meeting everyone in SEES, never pausing to give rain a second thought. Makoto asks if she wants to go outside and just spend time in the rain, enjoy it even if she can’t feel it, but she says she has a much better reason to stay inside as she holds Makoto’s hand (Makoto of course being completely willing to go outside with her for a casual walk, unphased by the pouring rain, strong wind, extremely poor visibility, and deafening thunder because he’s just built different). They don’t say much after that, but it’s more than enough to have a little bit of extra time together as they watch the lightning dance in the sky.

Chie and Yukiko: Not together at the time of the storm, but immediately after Chie texts Yukiko asking if she wants to walk around town and see how much damage it did. Yukiko loses it when they see a tree branch thrown through an empty car and Chie makes a joke about it looking like a giant steak skewer. It really doesn’t look like one and Chie knows it’s not funny, but she’s too busy staring at Yukiko and smiling to point that out.

Kanji and Naoto: Post-P4G where they’re both living together, Kanji digs out a bunch of old board games and they take some time to heal their inner children. Kanji doesn’t even remember where half of them came from, they were just in one of the boxes when he moved. He found the box and started reminiscing about being a kid and getting them but never having anyone to play with, and Naoto half-jokingly suggests they play to pass the time. He’s embarrassed, but does actually take her up on it, and she decides she’s all in when they make it a competition to see who can win more. They play all the ones that work with two players and it’s actually pretty close, but Naoto still ends up winning. Then they probably start making out once they run out of board games

Sumire and Akechi: They’re curled up on the couch watching Featherman together when the storm starts (credit to @maze-of-my-design’s reblog of my incorrect quote for that putting that image in my head) and keep watching together until the power goes out right in the middle of a big climactic episode at the worst possible time. Sumire has candles so they light a few for visibility and spend some time talking about random stuff and enjoying the atmosphere. Eventually Akechi complains about feeling sore and Sumire realizes how much he physically carries his stress and insists that he let her give him a back massage. She’s not a professional by any means, but she knows the importance of taking care of your muscles and this human angst pit has knots in his back that have probably been there since birth. Even with Sumire just kinda winging it, Akechi almost leaves his body from how much it helps, which lets her know she should definitely do it again. Then they just keep cuddling until the power comes back on while talking about Featherman plot holes.

Yu and Marie: If it’s during P4G, Marie definitely decides it would be fun to run around in the rain and Yu has to sprint after her to make sure she doesn’t get swept away by a flood. It’s exhausting, it’s stressful, and he’s smiling and laughing by the end of it because he got to spend time with Marie. They end up seeking shelter in the Shiroku Pub until the storm ends while Marie bombards the patrons with questions. If it’s after P4G, the thunderstorm is happening because Marie and Yu were too comfortable during sleepy morning cuddles so Marie summoned the storm to prevent them from having to go to work (that one might be less in character but it’s also hilarious so it’s going here).

[pinksilvace]

Fern guides their mutuals and followers through Cats 1998 as if we're all sitting on the same couch watching it and I'm shouting out stuff: 3/?

shaking you by the shoulders it's about the SUBTEXT this is SUBTEXT you've got to trust me on this one I swear

7: Grizabella the Glamour Cat

OKAY OKAY OKAY NOW WE'RE COOKING!!! We're moving along with Plot #1 (Grizabella) and getting hints about Plot #2 (Macavity)!!! Wahoo!!!

Unfortunately, the beginning of this scene is cut off in the official clip, so I'm going to drag a few pics from this recording as well since it covers all the same bases:

Starting off strong with a Psychic Moment (TM) so we know Something Big is coming

Bombalurina always does this sort of haughty walk past/around Grizabella, since Bomba's 100% on Team Demeter and Grizabella (maybe) represents stuff that Demeter wants to detach herself from. I will say, this production is quite a bit more aggressive than 1998, but I like this portrayal a whole lot too!!!

One of the big and obvious things to notice is how the kittens are physically protected from Grizabella (and moreso her past/what she represents). In 1998, this happens more in the form of the older cats pulling the kittens (Mistoffelees, Jemima, [who Skimble does physically restrain], Electra, Etcetera, and Victoria) away from Grizabella.

Another kitten moment - Plato and Tumblebrutus convince Pouncival to scratch Grizabella (in this recording it's just Tumble convincing him) and are reprimanded by Munkustrap. This is definitely one of my favorite background moments.

First, it shows off a dynamic consistent throughout the show: everybody takes care of everybody. More specifically, there isn't a specific assignment of which adult takes care of which kitten or who is closer than whom, and however much I'll reference ships and siblings and whatnot throughout these posts, I can only think of one canonical relationship; the rest change production to production, even in replica performances. Hell, they change cast to cast. The one exception is that of Coricopat and Tantomile, who are almost undoubtedly siblings/twins. Even the thing going on between Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer is left vague. TLDR, I enjoy how everybody bears some amount of responsibility for the kittens in this community model.

Second, this is one of those parts that calls into question Plato's age. He's in the same nebulous area as Mistoffelees, Mungojerrie, and Rumpleteazer, where he primarily hangs out and has interactions with the kittens but spends more time on his own than most of them. This is where looking at the RCCL performace coincidentally comes in handy for this analysis; the interpretation of Plato's character in that one has him older and more responsible. I've seen versions wherein Plato essentially acts as a third protector, and that's a neat way for his character to progress! Anyway uhhh I like him and he's pretty :3

THIS, THOUGH??? THIS IS THE IMPORTANT PART. Demeter reaches out to Grizabella, gets skittish, and rushes off to seek comfort from Bombalurina.

SO. Obviously, with all of the lines she sings, Demeter is familiar with Grizabella - if not on a personal level, then at least at a level distinct from that of the rest of the tribe.

What gets me. What GETS ME. is that Demeter only acts strangely (and stands out in general) whenever events have to do with one of two cats: Grizabella and Macavity. Most fans I've come across elect to go with the theory that these relationships are connected, especially because Demeter appears to have some sort of trauma associated with each of them. Their appearances also affect the tone of the Jellicle Ball in relatively similar ways, the main difference being that fear of Macavity translates to disgust of Grizabella.

Other folks have pointed out before that some stagings of this scene have Bombalurina (and sometimes Munkustrap) physically turning Demeter away from Grizabella, presumably for her own well-being.

Somewhat similar to what I pointed up above, this number establishes one of the few gender norms recurring through this show: the female kittens are guarded/protected/turned away, but the male kittens are left comparatively unsupervised. Considering that the only male kittens are Pouncival, Tumblebrutus, and Plato, one could argue over whether this is a gender norm in this society or whether there are other reasons for this. For instance, it is possible that Plato's older age and taller stature grant him independence, or that Pouncival and Tumblebrutus don't have solid guardian figures in the tribe.

Personally, I think it's more likely the choreography was directed with the mentality that the female kittens have a greater need for protection - which, considering the implied content of Macavity, Grizabella, and Demeter's stories, might not actually be wrong in-context.

So, it's obvious that Demeter wants to talk to/about Grizabella, even if she brings up apparently bad memories. She turns away from Bombalurina of her own volition. Whatever memories are stirred up, the badness of them likely does not have to do with Grizabella herself, lending credibility to the idea that she's connected with Macavity.

Tottenham Court was, historically, somewhat of an entertainment district in a poorer area of London. Allegedly (as in, I've only seen this stated in Cats circles and don't have time for further research at the moment), it was also strongly associated with prostitution in Eliot's time. "The Rising Sun" and "The Friend at Hand" are local pubs.

Essentially, the lines Demeter sings imply that Grizabella was a cat of the streets that hung around seedy areas, and that she eventually became so wretched as a result that even humans wonder how she's still around.

Some earlier lines - those that Grizabella sings about her appearance - are from a different poem of Eliot's and are used to describe a prostitute.

All in all, one interpretation of all of this is that Grizabella fell from grace by being "in kahoots" with Macavity. At this point in the show, the other Jellicles don't chase her off, but she is clearly not welcome.

I'll talk more about Demeter's deal in the Macavity section.

Electra loving Munk moment :3

[warmhealerr]

Big and not terribly interesting DND chars rambling sorry, but I do find it compelling how central the theme of Gender has become to the Gnome family. I am not just talking about at least two of the siblings being trans (though it is not to be ignored of course), I mean how much of their pain and the tragedy surrounding them is informed by both maternal and paternal families' expectations.

Mother says draconic blood runs in the girls of the family only (untrue, but she doesn't know that) and as such girls are especially important and strong. Father says he is proud of owning the family farm, being his own father's son, and his grandfather's grandson, and his great-great-great grandfather's great-great-great grandson. Neither mother nor father are outspoken dismissive bio essentialists, but their proud, "gendered" heritage and the way they try to nurture its greatness sets up their children for failure, as they all end up at odds with what they deem they are expected to be. Inherent traits and extreme bad luck further fostering insecurities. Zilkon didn't look like the average cis male deep gnome for a while (not bald before BG3) and he was proud of that, he liked standing out. He didn't want to be the eldest son crumbling under the responsibility of his heritage and his physical appearance was the only thing separating him from this depressed mess he had become trying to live up to everyone's expectations, the "strongest". He never let them down but he never got a break to exist for someone else. Mischkit wanted to be a big strong actually useful and beloved by everyone man so bad, especially witnessesing Zilkon's failures, because deep down it was just too hard to admit being a woman to himself and others especially in a family where being a woman had shifted from being grand to being pitiful through Oulmat's birth and their many sisters' painful deaths. Oulmat is nearly always worrying about being eaten alive and stepped on because she's always felt like a weak little thing, being born without draconic heritage and bad with learning the Weave, the promise of "every girl" in her family. She's always been outperformed by men, who supposedly should've been weaker. Even though her family would try to reassure her she only ever grew more scared and bitter and subconsciously A LOT of her issues whether her self perception or how she interacts with the world have stemmed from her failing what she expected she should achieve. The only men she has no issues with are Zilkon and Baltumal, who when you look at them are GNC both in presentation and what she expects men to behave like. She DOES have issues with Joufos' transition too, as he basically abandoned the "sacred woman" role to be just some damn guy, yet another man on top of her with everything she was promised, though she keeps that bitterness on the inside (or tries, it does slip out). Joufos has obviously gone through the hell of gender being an openly trans man, who's spent his childhood with girl if not "powerful womanhood" forced down his throat when he wanted none of it, as he aligned himself with his dad and Mischkit's performance of masculinity. His transition was supported by everyone of course, but gender is a very bitter deal to him. He isn't particularly wise, but sometimes, he notices a bit more than everyone else how generational gender roles have shaped his family despite them saying otherwise. This isn't even discussing all the dead fucking siblings (5 of them, this family is a castle of bones) and how they've both suffered and contributed to the problem individually.

All in all it's the kinda parents that expect a new baby and immediately start planning everything based on gender despite saying they don't care, and when the child actually is here you can tell how the family's perception and desires around the kid's "gender" affects the parenting style drastically even with no hard nos around gendered stuff (as I am currently witnessing with my family raising my own little brother).

I'm not a big fan of gender essentialism nor assigned sex being the focus especially in fantasy, but I really can't look at all these characters and their problems and pretend Gender isn't the thing they should bring up at a group therapy session, neither do I want to erase such an interesting implicit source of conflict as the writer. To think all this started because I gave Joufos funny pink hair and I was like "This guy is trans and the pink hair is a draconic thing" nearly a year ago.

[alovelyburn]

Rambles about the Millennium Falcon Arc Part 2

You know, I really should have just tacked the Griffith stuff here onto the last one, but it was so long.....

Anyway as a result this is a bit of a transitional piece that covers Griffith’s establishment of his Apostle inner circle as well as Farnese and Serpico’s backstory. Ahoom.

Oh and headsup for discussion of... incest I guess? Eh, you know what I mean, if you’ve read Berserk you know what they’re like in this part.

Rambles about the Millennium Falcon Arc Part 2

1. So, one thing I forgot to mention, is this kind of subtle heart theme that turns up in Neo/Femto’s stuff, like Femto’s entire chest reflects it as well...

With his chest muscle area resembling a biological heart which then heads down into a series of stylized hearts. It’s interesting – the heart theme I assume is a call to his role as the King of Longing – it seems analogous to Slan’s dildo corset. Things that represent them. I have to look closer at Ubik, Conrad and Void to see if they have anything similar.

 Anyway, back to Griffith scaring the hell out of Kushans.

 2. I love how Griffith just kind of waltzes over there and kills this guy. It does remind me of an old conversation I witnessed where people were arguing that Griffith in his current form isn’t a good swordfighter anymore because he doesn’t have a bunch of swordfighting feats. I think that’s a little silly though, like okay he came back to the world and just left all his skills behind, sure.

3. So, because Miura never really broadcast what Femto/Griffith could do (and sometimes showed things quite subtly, although obviously not right here), I’ve seen a lot of confusion over this and people just kind of forgetting some of the things he can do, I’m going to try to keep track of his demonstrated abilities. None of them have official names obviously but this one I call “Immunity to Violence.” Specifically physical violence, because it appears that physical weapons just don’t connect with him at all – he doesn’t block them or dodge them they just never touch him. I wonder if this is the issue Guts ran up against in recent chapters.

Guts definitely got closer than like, the arrows but that could have something to do with the amount of force or the fact that Guts was closer to begin with?  Who kooooows.

Yeah, I’m sure that the dozens or hundreds of arrows that just fell out of the air and landed roughly the same distance from him all at once was a coincidence, cool. I mean, obviously this guy doesn’t even believe it, it’s just such a silly thing to say.

4. I don’t remember whether I’ve talked about this before, sob. But I often think about like, why some apostles’ human form have an actively bestial look to them, like Zodd, and some are just entirely human looking, like Locus for example.  And then you also have some people in the middle like Grunbeld. There’s a few things that could explain this.

-They could get more bestial over time like vampires in some vampire mythos will tend to do.  I don’t really think this is it, though, in part because Grunbeld is quite a young Apostle but he still looks partway to Zoddville.

-It could be that their “human” form as an apostle is not necessarily what they looked like in their human life, like it could be that it reflects something about them or their desires. This is probably more likely than the first, and someone like Wyald is strong evidence for that because his actual human form was a frail old man while his Apostle human form was, well, Wyald.

-It could be that they just don’t all walk around in full human or full awakened forms all the time. Maybe if they go fully into their human form they look like they did in life, but some of them choose to live in a mid-transformed state. This is the theory I like the best, because it explains a number of things, such as Grunbeld being obviously too tall to be human. It’s also probably correct, because you do see Rosine stop at different points along the human to apostle scale.

That really had nothing to do with anything but anyway.

5. Locus is one of those characters I wish we had more information on. But I also wish we had more information on.... people who have powers but aren’t mages or seemingly otherwise magical. Sonia is the obvious first example – a seer, a medium, a telepath, just kind of out of nowhere. In the Grunbeld novel, they have another character who had some kind of psychic or mystical oracling ability, and then we have this mention by Locus.

Generally speaking I find Berserk’s worldbuilding quite fascinating and well thought-out, although I do think there’s a shift in the kind of world this is meant to be between the Black Swordsman arc and the Lost Children arc. @Chainusser has discussed how the basic components of the world seem to have switched from the middle ages to somewhere approaching the renaissance, for example – Miura loved his anachronisms, but I do think that’s true. But that’s only one of the changes really – we also started getting oracles and psychic girls out of nowhere which honestly maybe shouldn’t bother me since the witches also came out of nowhere, but I do kind of want to know what their relationship to the world is. Are all their visions sent by the Godhand the way the blind priest in Conviction’s were? That’d be pretty uh interesting.

5. “The wind whispered that the world had begun to change.” I love the way the world starts to warp itself in response to Griffith’s presence or even just the approach of a time when he’ll be present. It happened in the Golden Age, and it continues to happen. It’s one of the things that makes me think the reincarnated Godhand of a given millennium is meant to change the world for its next era – the world literally starts to prime itself for major changes.

So what do you think the chances are that Raksas is actually the one who takes out Griffith? Can’t say it wasn’t foreshadowed if so.

I love this bit a lot – the brutality and chaos caused by the Apostles and the casualness with which they present it.

One of the things I like about this whole sequence, the whole thing from Griffith’s arrival through the Apostles kneeling before him is... the sheer carnage that they cause when they arrive, breaking down gates and decimating dozens of fighters in a handful of seconds. Because it does underscore the strength of the army Griffith ends up commanding but also the brutality of them, which contrasts beautifully with the more controlled and civilized way they behave once Griffith gets his talons on them.

I also like... how freaking menacing they look back there.  Now this is kind of interesting, too:

6. “That’s the Hawk of Light. The savior of the world. Or perhaps...”

Schierke’s first appearance. I think it’s interesting that she refers to Griffith as both the Hawk of Light and then on the next page as the Hawk of Darkness. She also reflects some uncertainty as to what he is and what he is there to do – the savior of the world, or perhaps...

One of the things I notice about the way the mystical types perceive Griffith  -- and I’m not going to claim this is universal because I’m ultimately just referring to the ones I can remember – is that they don’t tend to refer to him as an inherently malevolent force but rather as a confounding force that creates... chaos as a byproduct of his existence. Here I’m thinking all the way ahead to Elfhelm, where the people Guts talked to about Griffith perceived the monsters and destruction he created not as an end to itself but as something done in order to accommodate his creation of Falconia but I mean we’ll get into that more later I’m sure.

Anyway the point is...

 Schierke obviously finds him distressing and dangerous – I think at some point he’s actually called dreadful? Maybe that was a fan translation. But it does make sense considering one of the first things he does is start burning down powerful witches. Even so, he does have this air of ambiguity to him as is appropriate for one whose actions may cause suffering or salvation.

Also, Master of the Sinful Black Sheep (Apostles), King of the Blind White Sheep (humanity). I’ve seen it suggested that the latter is the Holy See specifically which I guess would work as a messianic reference, but I do think it means humanity as a whole since his deal is that he’s leading all of mankind into one nation under, well, him.

7. The destruction, the violence, and the beauty that shines through it and overrides it, it’s very appropriate to Griffith, don’t you think?

I wonder if every incarnated Godhand becomes the master of the Apostles or if it’s just part of Griffith’s specific thing. Better than that, though, I wonder if there were Apostles when the last Godhand incarnated.  That might seem like a somewhat random question, but this is something I’ve been thinking about for a while now: when Void’s Eclipse is shown there are no apostles anywhere. And the name Apostle in itself suggests followers of something or someone – a messianic figure for example. Also, we’ve never met an Apostle older than Zodd, and he’s only 300. Now obviously there could be older ones out there we’ve never met, but it is interesting isn’t it? It wouldn’t be farfetched to suggest that they are, well, Apostles of Griffith specifically and that this specific form of human-turned-demon may have been created specifically for this era.

Okay so lemme talk a little bit about Griffith for a moment.

I always say NeoGriffith is my favorite of all the Griffiths – and he is. He is the embodiment of all the things that draw me so powerfully to Berserk – the embodiment of the questions raised by the worldbuilding, and his enigmatic nature is incredibly intriguing to me: what does he feel? Is it anything? How does he feel about his situation? Does he have regrets? Is he happy? Is he capable of happiness? Does he find Falconia satisfying, or does he miss the people he lost? Obviously that One Scene, you know the one, seems to imply that he does miss them and does harbor some regrets. But at the same time he also implies that he doesn’t feel that way until the transitional period between Moonkid and NeoGriffith, thus implying that on a day-to-day basis he’s fine.

NeoGriffith is, like I said, an enigma. I’ve seen people say he comes off as a bit robotic, going through the motions of fulfilling the things Griffith wanted to do for no particular reason other than that Griffith once wanted to do them. I’m not sure I’d go quite that far, but there is a certain emptiness to him and it’s hard to say whether it’s because he himself is empty or because honestly most of what he does amounts to going through the motions because he lives on a stage and he is in a constant state of performance. He does show hints of reactions from time to time that seem genuine – the smile as he walked away from Rickert after being rejected comes to mind – but most of the time it’s like he’s semi-sleepwalking through life, and the thing is that does make sense because ultimately Griffith as he is now is a fundamentally different kind of being than he was as a human.

Also, Miura once commented that he wrote Griffith as someone who didn’t talk about his mental state, which does imply that there’s something going on there beyond what’s immediately evident – especially since that was a response to someone noting that he seems like a secondary protagonist after his reincarnation. So he wasn’t talking exclusively about Griffith’s emotional and psychological issues during the Golden Age. There’s something happening behind his placid surface.

But all that said.... he does lack a lot of human Griffith’s charm, and sometimes it’s difficult to believe that it’s the same person – although, in fairness, it isn’t really.

But all that said as well, I will note that it’s actually pretty hard to tell how much like Hawks Griffith he really is, because when we knew Hawks Griffith we saw him through Guts’ experience, and Griffith was never “normal” about Guts. My point being its entirely possible that from the outside – from the perspective of people who weren’t the best friend Griffith was in love with and confided everything in – the personalities would not be as visibly different as they are to us.

(In fact I’d say that’s probably the case.)

Miura once said that Griffith’s return to the world was the beginning of his and Guts’ relationship as adults. So that’s interesting, too.

And now on to Farnese and Serpico!

8. The relationship between Serpico and Farnese is kind of awkward to write about, because of the Serpico/Farnese relationship being weird and because as a result I’m going to have to talk about incestish-tinged emotional relationships. But here we go.

In one of those quotes posted on Twitter, Miura talked a bit about his unwillingness to do that anime thing where someone is really strong but has a skinny body, so he felt like Serpico’s formidability had to come from his speed. I don’t think he directly mentioned Serpico’s wits, but I do think that not unlike Griffith, his mind is one of his stronger assets, and so is his ability to play pretend. I mean I can see why some people consider him to be a Griffith type even though as I’ve said before I don’t really think they’re that similar.

Anyway, for a small kid without money, developing those skills – learning how to defend himself without brawn, learning how to outsmart an enemy or let them think he’s helpless and then snap out at them becomes key to his survival. He still kind of uses that strategy – appear meek and weak and then unleash when necessary.

But even though the skills in question end up helping him later in life, when he was a kid it just made things more difficult – he talks about having to bear the pride that his mother put on him and having it stripped away daily. It seems like her insistence that he remain prideful tended to force him to his feet when he was attacked but instead of saving him, it made his tormentors even more cruel, and the beat him down until that pride drained out. And then he’d go home and have it pushed onto him again. It’s another thing he has in common with Farnese later – the weight of “family” expectations that he can never live up to. That, really, he doesn’t even want to live up to.

I guess his mother had “consumption”, aka tuberculosis? Because I don’t know that untreated advanced cancer would have allowed her to live long enough to end up burning on the stake whereas TB may give you a few years. Plus she was having coughing fits.

It’s interesting to me how this idea – the dream that is a burden – keeps coming up, particularly in reference to these poverty-stricken people who are meant to try and raise themselves up to nobility. This makes sense because in the kind of society we’re talking about here, it’s almost impossible to actually achieve that feat, so trying to do so is like trying to run on quicksand. In Serpico’s case he isn’t really allowed to let go of that and try to build a life inside the world that he actually inhabits instead of the one she dreams of him entering.  

It’s a bit different with Griffith because he’s... Griffith, I mean he’s built different. But even he found it burdensome by the end. Serpico also lacks Griffith’s unrealistic charisma and I’m not saying this to bag on Serpico I’m just saying that he lacks the Griffith option of turning his enemies into followers, so all he can do is try to survive them.

Enter Farnese.

Yeah she did think that. I mean I guess the thing is, at this point in their lives they’re both needing something the other can provide. Farnese, living in this loveless house, neglected and ignored, is desperately looking for someone to love her and pay attention to her – thus the progressive set of animals she tries and fails to bond with which is a whole other issue. But I do think she initially took him in for the same reason she picked up all these animals. If he hadn’t taken to her, I’m honestly not sure what she would have done. Thrown him on the pyre too? Kicked him out into the streets? Probably something like that.

But that doesn’t happen, because Serpico has basically been primed for this moment by his mother’s insistence that he aim to enter noble society. ...he’s also been primed for it by the events of his life as a poverty stricken kid who has to support his dying mother and himself, and is constantly getting beaten half to death for it. For him, as ill-tempered as she is, Farnese is a savior of sorts – she takes him off the streets and out of the cold and gives him a better life, and because she does he is able to afford a caretaker for his mother, thus lifting that off of him as well.

The fixation he develops on her as a result of that reminds me of Casca’s fixation on Griffith, or Farnese’s fixation on Guts – though it manifests differently because Serpico is a different person. But, you know. As a result of this person upending the world they felt trapped in and showing them a new way of life, they develop this devotion to that person. Although I will say in Serpico and Farnese’s case, in many ways she didn’t free him so much as give him a more comfortable cage.

9. The way Farnese treats Serpico is, you know, completely abusive. It’s also odd because there seems to be very little motivation behind it, and it’s not as though she doesn’t care about him. I think one big thing is that at this point in her life, Farnese is still in the habit of trying to control everything that she feels threatened by or is afraid of – not to say she’s afraid of what Serpico would do to her but rather she’s afraid of being emotionally invested in someone who doesn’t invest back.

Which brings me to what I think is the primary reason she does this: as a test of his devotion. It’s something people with a fear of abandonment do sometimes: push people to see whether they come back. How much do you love me? If I say this thing, will you forgive it? Do you love me enough to overlook how mean I am? Do you love me enough to not get mad when I hurt you? Do you love me enough to stay when I tell you to go?

If the target leaves, it just confirms their fear that they’ll always be left behind. But at least it hurts less if they know it was their choice.

And if the target stays... it’s not enough. It’s never enough, because they always think the next thing will go over the line and they’ll be alone again.

Serpico recognizes that isolation and loneliness in her because he lived with it in his own life. I imagine too that part of the reason he sticks by her so hard is because of what he did to get there: he failed his mother – left her alone and unable to fend for herself, with only a caregiver to spend time with. He chose Farnese instead. Having made that choice, he can’t go back without making it all worthless.

Which isn’t to say he doesn’t love Farnese or that he wants to abandon her, I don’t think that’s the case at all.

Something ghastly compelled her – it’s the fear though, isn’t it? Farnese is afraid of a lot. And her way of staving off that fear is to try to control it and if she can’t control it, then she tries to join with it. A fire can’t burn its own flames. Lightning can’t strike itself. If she keeps dancing with the storm, then it can’t sweep her away.

Editorializing moment but while I understand what’s going on here, it’s also the only thing I have a hard time with. I’m an animal person, idk what to tell you.

I like how Miura let the reader and Serpico come to understand Farnese bit by bit together. Not that you could tell from how I frontloaded info oops.

But the fact that she’s willing to burn her beloved keepsake because of an offhand remark from her father speaks volumes. She’s chasing his shadow, trying to be seen. Trying to win affection from a rock. Basically.

Serpico understands her, though, because even if they come from different places and had different experiences, they know the same pain. They both lived in isolation and loneliness in their childhood. They both spent most of their time afraid. To bury that fear they surrounded themselves in walls that obscured their core selves from the world – even though to do that left them cut off from the things they wanted to reach for, alone in the cold.

And I think this – this moment when he comes to truly understand her and chooses to stand with her even when she tries to push him away – its really the moment when their relationship started developing in the direction that it did. For better or worse. ...mostly worse, really, at least until later.

And the reason it’s mostly worse is this little catch in the road. Because the thing is I... this is a I guess a controversial topic, but for me it was always very obvious that Serpico and Farnese were kind of... I mean, look, I’m not trying to make a statement about children having romantic feelings for each other (although I mean, they do – I remember when I was in like 5th grade people talked about who they had crushes on all the time, they even “dated,” idk, do people not do that anymore? I HAVE NO IDEA, I DON’T KNOW ANY CHILDREN) but I am saying the relationship between them is... romance...flavored? And I mean, I guess some people have a hard time seeing/accepting that because they’re siblings but like, they didn’t know that at first, and Farnese still doesn’t know. I’ll bring up some other stuff in a minute but first let’s just say... their being related changes the trajectory of their relationship in a way that neither ever fully adjusted to.

 And we’re about to get into all that in this next chapter I guess!

"Time passed within the labyrinth. The two saplings beneath the snowy drift became bent and entwined as they grew. And before they knew it, trees begin to extend their branches beyond their miniature garden... bearing curious fruit.”

Farnese uses Serpico as a shield between herself and the obsequious social climbers trying to cling to her skirt. That’s the thing, like she’s obviously snubbing them but as soon as we move away from her and see what people are saying about it...

No one cares about her. No one’s talking about how sweet or intelligent she is or how charming or how beautiful, it’s just gdi I want to marry into her family. And I mean look that’s probably because the only thing of the above that they can attest to is her looks – she won’t talk to them so it’s not like they know how bright she is or even what her personality is like once you get close. But knowing that must be a turnoff for her when she has Serpico there at her side. Besides if she marries into some noble family isn’t that the same as staying there? Wouldn’t she just end up alone in a house again?

And okay here comes the uhh incestish portion of this treatise.  I know it’s a touchy subject, and I’ve had some disagreements with people who don’t believe there was anything particularly romancey going on between them, but I’m going to state it and back it up, and by the way it’s not like I want them to get together ok, it’s the same thing I always do: just look at what’s on the page and take it for what it is.

Okay so the point about them that I most often see is that Farnese only asked to run away with Serpico because she was desperate to escape the arranged marriage, not because she had any particular romantic interest in Serpico himself. I’m here to say that’s incorrect and here’s why:

First – the way she treats him, the way she whips him and then gets noticeably excited by it, and the sexualized way in which her interactions with his bare skin are presented are extremely reminiscent of her reaction to whipping Guts back in the day... which was very obviously because she was attracted to him. ...and to whipping, I guess. Also....

Second - Serpico is aware that she’s into him before the arranged marriage thing comes up, he’s just kind of ignoring it. In the guidebook there’s this one bit where it says that she uses her actions toward him as an outlet for her feelings and desires. Which makes sense because the more she loves the more she fears, and so she lashes out and she gets possessive and she tests and she hurts him in order to reassure herself or comfort herself, or vent the things she wants into a more “acceptable” form if you consider whipping your servant and biting him acceptable I guess, I mean uhhhh it’s not but you know, maybe it’s more socially acceptable than having a relationship with an underling even if he is titled.

Sometimes I feel like the way Farnese treats Serpico is the way some weirdo Griffith haters think he treated Guts, lmao. You know like the people who are all, yeah he had feelings for Guts but obviously he was super-abusive. Like I don’t know if they have whipping headcanon going on or what. Anyway.

More on that in a second, but first...

The juxtaposition here is really cool – Look at the way the page is constructed with the panel layout of the bottom a reflection of the top, emphasizing the way Serpico and Farnese’s experiences and relationships with their defining but absent parents are similar and different. In Serpico’s case, his mother is mentally absent – because she’s so sick, he grew up in a state of parentification. He had to fend for himself. Farnese is the same way – she grew up in a gilded cage instead of a hovel and the streets, but even so she was left to raise herself, emotionally abandoned, and each of them were ultimately subject to the demands and expectations of those parents which forced them into roles they wouldn’t otherwise have taken on.

And this expression – the same face she had on when her father told her to throw away her beloved bunny doll. Parental relationships can just be like. Needles under your skin, I don’t know.

Okay so like, Farnese doesn’t know they’re related, you know? She isn’t asking him to do this just so she can escape – she has feelings for him, Serpico was already aware of that. That being the case, and knowing how terrified she is of abandonment or rejection, and the fact that to issue this request is to defy the orders of the father she’s been chasing all her life... imagine how hard it was for her to ask him this.

I don’t really think that she’d made this request if she weren’t in love with him, because it’s too big a risk. If it were like that – if all she wanted to do was escape – there’s no reason she couldn’t have just said let’s leave, fuck this place. She didn’t have to frame it as a romantic overture. But the fact that she comes out with this now, right after her father announces that he’s betrothed her to some guy she doesn’t know, is also pretty telling. It’s her last chance to try to say what she hasn’t been saying before it’s too late.

 And I think...

The shock and pain on her face when he rejects her speaks for itself. I just think after all they’d been through together, and everything she’d thrown at him without his complaining, and all the times she tested him and found that he was always still there with her... she didn’t... expect him to reject her. This ultimately sets her off into a frenzy because...

Remember, when she hurts, or is afraid, she tries to control it, and then she tries to merge into it. It’s just the same as when she feared the burning outside her window and fought it by throwing torches on the pyre, or when she was afraid of the storm so she went out and started dancing with it, destroying things. I think... the fact that her father is trying to oust her from the house, that the person she thought returned her feelings rejected her (which to her mind means she’s now trapped into this marriage), she feels like it’s burning her down, so she expresses her pain by burning everything else down too. And that’s why....

She is able to calm down when Serpico saves her, and holds her.

The thing is, when she tried to initiate a romantic relationship with him and he turned her down, she probably registered that as the end of the road basically – the thing that finally drives him away from her. But when he saves her, when he still cares about her and stays with her, she’s able to regain enough security and stability to stop her rampage. But the thing is...

Remember she is a person who is terrified of rejection. The fact that she never brings it up again doesn’t mean that her feelings changed. It means that she is never going to take that risk again, because she barely survived it the first time.  Also honestly, when someone rejects you, leaving it alone and not bothering them about it is probably the right thing to do, you know?

I think Serpico’s feelings are a little more difficult to read, in part because he’s so masked up all the time. But in an interview Miura does refer to him as analogous to Andre from Rose Versailles, which is telling if you know the story because he’s the attendant who loves Oscar and stays by her side even though he has no reason to believe he’ll ever be able to be with her. It also got into Miura’s theory on romantic ideals – the three types of man that he believed women would dream of, in Farnese’s case being the faraway one that she longs for (Guts), the one who sticks by her side (Serpico) and down to earth guy with money who woos her (Roderick). It’s also mentioned elsewhere that Serpico has “special feelings” for her, which could mean anything really. And their relationship is described as having the “outward appearance of a mistress/servant relationship, but....”

NOW, LISTEN. I don’t want anyone walking away from this thinking I want siblings to hook up, lmao. It’s not that, it’s just that I think that... it’s important to register where these characters are coming from because we’re about to go on a long journey with them, and one that both challenges and changes their dynamic. If we can’t recognize that Farnese and Serpico have this kind of like emotionally incestuous thing happening, or that those feelings never quite faded (at least up to this point in the story), then a lot of things later make less sense.

And the other thing is... Farnese has no idea that this is even an issue. She doesn’t know Serpico is her brother. To her, he’s just a guy she loved who rejected her. So this story looks very different from her angle than it does from Serpico’s or the reader’s.

Anyway, moving along.

It’s interesting to me how Serpico... is like “yeah maybe this is where she’s meant to be!” Because the last time we saw her burning things with that look on her face, he recognized it as a coping mechanism – pushing people away. But at the same time, I think at this point he was probably just relieved and pleased that she had found something, since they were no longer able to be as close as they were. The distance that came up between them after he rejected her means that he can’t warm her the way he used to, even though he’s still there at her side.

Somehow I forgot that the people they were burning weren’t even pagans, they were like... Lutherans basically, yeesh.

This is like the final boss in Serpico’s life. Sorry that’s kind of callous but what I mean is, he’s been running from his past for so long, struggling with his feelings about his mother who was ... not a good parent but through no fault of her own. And he had that... caretaker’s curse of half-wishing she’d die, and at the same time still loving her, and hating her. He ran from it really – has he even stayed in regular touch with her?

...yeah, Lutherans. It’s tragic though because it’s not like she even had the capacity to understand or decide to join this other sect, not that it’s okay to burn people for being Lutherans anyway.

This is such a heartwrenching moment. The thing is, it seems cruel – it is cruel. But she’s trying to protect him. In this moment, surrounded by the Holy See’s knights, what can they do?

The scene of the burning there, that’s from when Farnese burned her beloved worn down bunny. Because her father told her to, and she ultimately... chose to follow his edict rather than holding onto something she loved.

So. Farnese tells him to burn his mother – the broken down thing that he still loves – and he does it. So he can follow her, at the expense of losing something he held onto until now.

The metaphor of fire that keeps coming up in Berserk – fire that keeps the dark back, fire that marks the presence of a true leader. For Farnese, fire means a way out of the cold that she’s lived in her whole life. Serpico lived inside it with her, and they gave each other warmth, but as long as they were trapped inside the world defined by others – the Vandimions, the church, they would never truly be able to thaw. Serpico seems to recognize this drive in her  - the way she’s drawn to Guts’ light, ironically enough, given that he is so dark.

It foreshadows, too, the way Guts will change their dynamic as Farnese develops her feelings for him, and Serpico... deals with that.

All right, well, that was longer than I expected. Just proves I can bang on forever about literally anything because I never thought that much about Serpico’s past before.

You know what I have thought a lot about though? The Beast of Darkness, which is coming up next time same hawk time same hawk channel.

[trans-clown-catgirl]

desire and ghost for your lil rodent dude? o^:

oohoohohoho ok so Desire: so. first n foremost i wanna point at smth in zidian's original image

Skeletons aside- his core objective is to learn how to resurrect people. he has no idea what his next goal in life will be past that, and it's what pretty much all his free time is spent on, with only a few exceptions because he at least has some concern for his mental health despite... everything. he's definitely open about it, he's approached people before in the effort to get there, but he's definitely not open about that whole necromancy part, because that's obviously incredibly taboo. he'll only share that if he determines you're probably ok to tell that to.

as for what he would do to achieve it, he's... already done a lot . like way too much. first off he can't really practice resurrection on animals because they're nowhere near as complex as people, and getting your hands on fresh corpses without killing people is uh. difficult. so instead he goes graverobbing, digs up the oldest corpses he can find because he would probably not be able to stand looking at a mid-decay corpse, and tries to resurrect them. skeletons. he tries to resurrect skeletons. you know, try to get them to a living state. needless to say, not a good idea! because trying to regenerate an entire body off of just the bones, no organs or tissue or muscle or anything, is very difficult. so it's just necromancy. of course, seeing how that failed multiple times, he looked for ways to amplify his magic abilities- and unfortunately, there's no real way to do that permanently without years upon years upon years of practice. without some sacrifice, at least.

so, he sold his soul. to who or what exactly i haven't exactly thought up all that hard, but part of the deal was that he would have to carry it with him at all times and protect it- the gem containing it is very very durable though, and has some magic protection added on top of that, so it's nigh unbreakable through brute force. it does have a toll on his energy, though- he needs to constantly refuel himself via magic, and his mental health has deteriorated a bit since he did this, being more prone to obsession, intrusive (usually destructive) thoughts, alongside strong emotions and states of complete emotional blankness alike. it did boost his magic quite a bit, though- the skeletons he resurrected were no longer mindless and aggressive, and started actually acting civil, to some degree; they still can't talk, and mostly talk in low groans, but they're definitely sapient, and as mentioned before, just kinda chill in his basement and play poker because now it's not really ethical to re-kill them.

he's very corruptible- one of the people he's around, who helped him both carry out the process of selling his soul and adjust to his new state of being, also sold her soul, and has gone all the way in on the whole spirit fuckery stuff, to the point where her body has changed quite a bit physically, now only having one black eye with bright green pupils. she's a cat btw she's insane and tries to bring out the worst in zidian because she thinks he should cut loose and have some fun in life for once which to her means enabling all his worst traits .

despite all this, and all the unhealthy behaviors, he does try to keep himself kicking, capable enough to do what he needs to do- after all, if he dies, how is he gonna make up for his previous mistakes and resurrect people, bring them back from what would have otherwise been a bitter end? he has to keep going, no matter what. he does definitely overwork himself, but i do at least need to clarify he's not constantly exhausted and overworked, he can have fun and often does in his own strange ways, but it's not exactly infrequent for him to go to unreasonable lengths for progress.

oh yeah he also gets away with graverobbing by using illusion magic to scare away anyone who might try to stop him, usually by tricking them into thinking the spirits in the graveyard are pissed at them for approaching their land, eyes popping out of the ground and walls and all, he will make you experience The Horrors if you wanna stop him . usually he does that to uhhh whatever the fantasy equivalent of cops is . anyways sorry for the massive wall of text let's go on to a simpler one

Ghost:

so the reason he's trying so damn hard to learn necromancy is. he used to be in a guild, he was his group's cleric, the dedicated healer and all. he COULD hold his own in a fight, but couldn't really handle stronger opponents the way something like a dedicated fighter such as a barbarian or paladin would. that part's not relevant, what IS relevant is that one of his teammates died during a raid, and he tried his damnest to heal them- he tried again, and again, and again, he put all of his mana into it, every little drop of magic essence he could muster, but it didn't work. they were gone. he couldn't do anything about it. he joined to save lives and support others, but never really processed the idea that he could fail to save someone, and that they'd be gone as a result. it wasn't really his fault- no healer can reasonably be expected to be perfect, but it got to him, it got to him bad. he stopped showing up to expeditions and raids and the sort for some weeks, which is understandable considering he just saw someone die right in front of him despite how hard he attempted to make sure it didn't happen, and eventually he just quit outright, never ever touching the guild business again until he could figure out how to resurrect people and prevent it from ever happening again. the sight of someone's life leaving them right in front of him and the inability to stop it still haunts him to this day, and it's what drives him forward- he wants peace. he desperately needs peace, and he's completely convinced that once he can undo death, he'll finally have it, once there's no more flaw in his ability to save lives, he'll finally be at peace. so he thinks, at least. whether it will ever happen is uncertain.

but yeah that's his ghost fucked up huh didn't expect the rat to have trauma DID YOU i like him he's been bouncing around in my brain

[erigold13261]

Random HC. Yinu hates rock music bc it physically hurts her ears, and sounds like noise. (Sensory overload) She is the first one to X B2J in the audition, and doesn’t consider B2J to be music makers.

(I flipping LOVE the opening X scene so much! I wish we could replay it like all the other cutscenes)

But that makes sense! I always just took it as all the Megastars knowing to vote against any rock music, probably because of how Tatiana has talked about the genre. Though, looking back at things, it does make more sense that the Megastars voted on their own accord based on their own preferences. (I do know about the Zuke and Eve X thing that a lot of people have talked about).

Like okay, Yinu not liking rock because of sensory issues would explain why she is the first one to reject B2J (though it was more likely just because she had to be in the middle since her silhouette is not the most striking and having the X's start in the middle would have been the best visually way to go).

She also rejects them the fastest other than 1010. I did some math, trying to time out each rejection from the moment Tatiana finishes her sentence "Fellas, what do you think?" to the moment each red X sound is heard (couldn't go off visuals to make sure I hit my timer correctly).

I did this 4 official times, not counting the times I messed up and scrapped my data, and Yinu was definitely the fastest at .91 seconds. Then it would be 1010 at 2.57 seconds. Then Sayu at 4.11 seconds. DJSS at 4.84 seconds. And finally Eve at 5.23 seconds.

And honestly, to me, that makes a lot of sense.

Yinu is a child. Sure she likes being loud and stuff like that, but if she is unprepared for something like a live rock concert, it is going to distress her and make her very quick to reject B2J. And if she was overwhelmed just because she knows she doesn't like the genre (or at least the subset of the genre that B2J play) then of course she is going to be the fastest.

Next is 1010. Which is funny because they are supposed to be gentlemenly and kind, but are the only ones to actually cut off Mayday as she speaks (DJSS and Sayu cut her off right at the end of a sentence while 1010 cut her off right in the middle).

They are also significantly faster than the other artists, but not nearly as fast as Yinu. I would say that this is because they all have negative feelings of rock (from hearing Tatiana talk about it and Neon repeating it to them since he would back up Tatiana's word), but also because they are split as some of them do still like the genre just a bit. Honestly, I like to think Purl was the one to push the button to reject B2J, which is why it so rudely interrupted Mayday and was still pretty fast. Purl couldn't wait that extra 2 seconds (or 8 if they were gonna wait a whole 10 seconds lol) so they just pressed it themselves.

Sayu is next. And I would say the Crew (Sayu is not sentient at this time) are not struggling to decide on whether to reject B2J or not, but when to do so. They wait a moment. But they also really like cutesy hyper-pop kind of music. Stuff that could potentially be similar to rock but is a lot more upbeat and obviously more EDM. So their more dislike for rock makes them faster than DJSS.

DJSS on the other hand, I can see him as being a rock fan when he was younger (like disco rock or something, idk). He has convinced himself that rock is "no longer relevant" and put it beneath him though. There is no strong dislike or hate for it, but he sees themself and their music as better than that genre. Which is why they are ready to reject B2J, but also give more time with their rejection.

And finally Eve. She waits the longest and to the end (not counting Tatiana) to reject B2J. She probably doesn't hate rock at all, probably even played a bit with Zuke when they were together. However, she is more upset with Zuke and May as people (especially since Zuke is playing with some rando). She waits til the end, and when all Zuke can say is "tadaa?" she rejects him. She knows he is better than what he has stooped so low to become right now, and to her this rejection is probably a good wake-up call for him.

I obviously didn't time Tatiana as there is a whole conversation between her and Mayday after Eve rejects them. And it is obvious as to why she rejects them (she hates rock and was going to reject them anyway, but also the fact her skills as a musician were insulted even though May had no idea who she was beforehand). So yeah, we know why she rejected B2J and why it took so long to do so. She was, like how I guess Eve was doing, trying to give them some good advice on what to do next, even if that means never playing music again.

Okay, so sorry I hijacked your post to talk about all of this! I can definitely see Yinu being a rock hater, or at least a heavy rock hater. Things like industrial or hardcore rock is a definite no-go. And since that is probably the only rock she has ever heard then she would say she hates ALL rock. I am sure she can find a decent sub-genre in rock that she likes (like people who say they hate country and all they listen to is trash country).

Honestly, she probably had a rough time with Neo-Classical EDM (and EDM in general, at least stuff like Dubstep like Skrillex) as that could be pretty overwhelming at times (like have you heard experimental or glitch EDM? Yinu would HATE that, I love it though :3). So I can see her wearing some kind of ear plugs or headphones when she first started out. Once she got more used to playing with EDM she wouldn't need those as often.

But hey! When she does need them, Mama keeps some earplugs in her pocket. Also, I love the idea that DJSS has little child-sized noise cancelling headphones in their jacket pocket in case Yinu gets overwhelmed around them. :3

[crqelsummer]

I wanna know more about Elle. She's so interesting

Aoyama Elle, the only daughter to pro hero Twinkle (Aoyama Yuga) and fashion designer Aoyama Monica, is a character I currently chip away a little at every couple of days.

She, like most of the new Class 1-A, was always part of the original OHA cast from a couple years ago. She's probably changed the least since she didn't have much development prior to now.

She was born and raised in France, specifically in Lyon, lived there until she was about eleven. Elle ended up with a passport pretty early because Yuga (who I hc being white/asian himself) still mostly worked in Japan and had a residence there. It worked for her mother Monica (who was the designer of his silver age costume after he graduated UA and returned home + is a black french woman) too because her job didn't really keep in her one location primarily, but she mostly raised their daughter in France while Yuga would be away for work trips that required his Quirk in particular.

They did travel back and forth from time to time, so beforehand Elle knew some rudimentary Japanese. Yuga, being as busy as he was and still is, is a bit of a fractured person in Elle's memories though because he wasn't around as much. In some way, she and Kimiko can relate on this. Yuga never misses the big events, he refuses to, but there are slightly smaller ones that she sort of wishes he was at (Christmas in a handful of years, New Years in others, occasionally missing Valentine's Day and sending jewelry ahead of his arrival a week later...)

Elle started attending a Japanese boarding school in middle school because she'd proclaimed she wanted to specialize in hero work -- and wanted to attend Yuga's alma mater after she graduated. Obviously this was a pretty difficult task, she wasn't particularly fluent in Japanese at this point and it almost entirely uprooted her life. She could've pursued the course in Paris (another hc: almost every major city had a hero course similar to UA's, but some countries started the real work/hero licenses later on in university -- like in the US, Canada and the UK in some places), but UA would give her the fastest course to working in the field. And she just wanted to get a little more in touch with her father's culture, as well as closer to him considering she'd be able to see him work in person. So, she fast tracked to UA and just barely squeaked in through the physical entrance exam. I think in some vein even Aiko is pretty impressed she managed it.

Her Quirk, currently called Glamour, allows her to light her hands. Sort of like the first light baby, but she can only use it out of her hand because her mom has the Quirk of being able to create constructs of light out of her hands. Eventually it evolves that she can create semi solid constructs she uses as flashbangs, as well as some other evolutions I'm still working on. Considering some pretty big manga spoilers about Aoyama, I don't think she really gets much of Yuga's Quirk, if at all.

She's a really feminine person! I hesitate to describe it in any particular way, but the daughter of a fashion designer knows her stuff. Like this, this and this. She and Rin relate on this a lot, and while she can't really accessorize at school, off hours she uses the time to express herself more. I think Yuto likes this part about her too.

She absolutely refuses to stand by and watch though, which makes her a little bit of a liability. Her Quirk isn't very visibly destructive or physically strong, but she's loud when she disagrees and is willing to toss herself into danger to get others out. She's a little bit more of a rescue hero than anything, but she does her best. Will not to stand down until forced to.

Thank you for asking!! I'll have more later I'm sure <333

[inkscapedoodles]

You should share your silly little guy lore :D

KYAHAHAHA!!! You've fallen into my trap! Now y'all MUST listen to a patented Ink Ramble^TM once again!

Okay, okay, so!! Since the lore for this lad is relatively new and I still don't know everything about DSAF, there might be some things missing, but I'm gonna try my best!

They're a Spirit who's inhabited the Flipside for as long as it can remember, drifting between the different layers and watching life in the Real World go by! They exist throughout all the different timelines and endings (through temporal soul shenanigans that I will explain later), and can do that thing that Dave does with being able to see through Davetrap's eyes into the living plane, but in a way that's more like astral-projecting themself into a Fazbender's location to interact with other characters!

It acts much like your standard poltergeist, causing mischief and being spooky, but she's actually not inherently malicious. His behavior is moreso spurred on by boredom and lacking true purpose until someone starts causing problems for the restaurant. When this happens, they'll leave the Flipside and make a point to annoy whoever is causing havoc into having morals!

They're also a bit like Jack and Blackjack in the sense that they're "a soul separated from a body," but, the thing is, it never had a human form in the first place. Its ultimate goal is to get a human body to possess and "become a whole person!" However, when he's tried to find bodies in the past, none of them have quite stuck. There's always some force keeping her from staying in any one form for too long, like a repellent that's meant to get rid of pests. Or maybe there's just some tie that can't be severed between a body and a soul that was unfairly ripped away, such as with Fazbender victims...

Anyways, moving away from that sad stuff, onto the aforementioned temporal soul shenanigans! I'm taking a few liberties with this, cuz although we learn a good amount about the nature of souls from Henry's tapes, anomalies certainly can exist, with my lad being a prime example of such! They're not a clear soul of a child anymore, but I'd like to think that they started out as just a little, goopy thing floating around the Flipside, with no one to talk to or acknowledge their existence. Over time, they grew more saturated, yet not as dark as the souls that come from an adult's regret/deeper emotional palette. It does experience strong feelings, though, and has a portion of itself that came from the regret of witnessing the atrocities committed in various locations, but not being able to do anything about it. Without a body to act with and a weak grip on reality most of the time, it couldn't do much else but watch, y'know?

The main thing that causes them to travel through time and space, however, is the fluctuations in control it experiences with the large amount of energy it has in the culmination of its being. Confused yet?? Me too! Lol. Ahem, what I mean is that their soul has a large amount of energy contained in an unstable vessel. They obviously have no physical body to contain the power that they have, which I believe correlates to one's manifestation in the Flipside. I say this because we see characters like Peter and Steven who are still phone-heads in the Flipside despite being humans initially. It's an "if, then" statement imo. "If I was a phone-head in the real world, then I am a phone-head in the Flipside." Since the first part of this type of statement doesn't exist for my lad, they don't have anything to base their looks or strength/stamina off of. This fluidity of stability then causes temporal dissonance to occur, because, like Henry describes in his tapes, if a soul has enough strength (or strength in a given moment), it'll be able to move through time and space! Through this random movement which they can't control at first, they get pushed to different timelines and endings!!

Their behavior can change with each ending, too! I'm gonna use DSAF 3 as an outline to what they might do, mostly cuz there's more content to work with lol. Here are some exaples of how they may change!

•If the player proceeds with the Evil/Legacy Route, the Spirit becomes restless and upset, which leads to it appearing sometime after Dave's death and berating the player so that "YOU NEVER KNOW PEACE" after becoming a vessel for Henry. However, if a few other criteria (that I haven't figured out yet ^-^") are met, the Spirit will be sent on a journey of self-doubt and discovery that's prompted by the question: "Where did I, as a being that was never meant to exist, yet created by someone/something regardless, come from?" This causes it to learn about the Joy of Creation, leading to a line of reasoning that the monster person responsible for orchestrating all the tragedy across numerous locations must be their inventor, because this tragedy is all they've ever known. [I'm still working out the exact logic of this timeline, but I hope I got the general idea across!]

"SINCE I AM A CReated being and HENRY is a Creator, he must be my Origin..."

•When the player gets the neutral end, the Spirit is mostly just...disappointed. Sure, the player ran a successful restaurant and saved the modern image of Fazbender's, but that's nothing compared to helping free souls and defeating a great evil! They might encourage the player to chose a different path in order for something better to happen, but if the player doesn't listen to him, she'll either watch from the sidelines with a miserable attitude, or become a problem for the restaurant in order to spark a change of heart.

"YOU HAVE AMOUNTED TO NOTHING. how can you be proud? none have achieved their happiest day. it's all MEANINGLESS."

•For the Good End, the Spirit commends the player on their work to save everybody's souls and get closure! Yay! (Honestly, I still have to think about this route some more, but I do have an idea of how it all gets resolved.) At the very end, I can see the Spirit being content with everything going up in flames, even grateful that a few more people were released from suffering despite the fact that it can't follow them. However, this state of calm probably wouldn't last long, and they'd be shoved through time yet again so as to keep existing as they are instead of fading away like everything else.

"i cannot ASCEND with you all. I WILL WATCH AS IT BURNS AND SIMPLY REMAIN AS I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN. THOUgh...PeRhaps I was too harsh with some of you. Thank you. For all that you have done."

And that's nearly everything about this lad that I have so far! I hope y'all like my silly lil guy!!