#like hell is other people he torments himself by objectifying himself in the eyes of others even if he is alone

[happy10thousandyears]

I feel like spending so much time thinking about 🪞 kinda made me immune to any disturbing media content (if it’s not visual). Like no matter the trauma depicted I’ve already spent enough time thinking about the marks it leaves on characters it’s like . Okay it can’t be worse than 🪞

[meanbossart]

So, not sure if you've covered this. But I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about the durgetash subtext? Are you pro or against? How do you treat the "relationship" / "partnership" between them? I'm curious to know how their interactions would play out hahah. (Im very pro Durgetash, cause... well. Yeah.)

First of all, obviously I'm all for people interpreting subtext however they wish to interpret it, and I think there's more than enough in the game to imply a canonical romance between The Dark Urge and Gortash; some of my favorite artists on here delve into that and I think both their art and theories are brilliant. Especially as the canon stands now, I think it's more likely that they DID have something going on rather than not, though I doubt Larian will ever confirm it one way or another to allow the player freedom with their avatar's background.

That said, in the lore I decided for DU drow they did NOT have a romantic relationship, although they did have a complicated one. My first impression upon meeting Gortash at his coronation (this was long before all the dialogue Larian added) was of someone who wanted desperately to butter me up to get his plans back on track. Yes, I do think he was happy to see the drow, but that's because he knew DU drow would honor their initial agreement (had his memories not been erased, at least) and was indeed more reliable than Orin - who clearly wanted to achieve things on her own instead of entertaining their alliance even before betraying her brother.

I did a write-up a while back on what DU Drow's perception and plans for Enver were here, but I would like to make some additions!

First of all I didn't clarify this, but when I talk about "love" in that post I did not mean the romantic kind. What DU drow had for Gortash was a tenderness that he could not bring himself to entertain in earnest because of his profoundly skewed sense of empathy and emotions. He did relate to Gortash, He did admire how he had lifted himself up from nothing and how he easily brushed off DU drow's attempts to get under his skin. DU could simply never admit such a thing or even recognize it in himself - had he been a more sane man they would have been dear friends, and there would be glimpses of that could-be friendship in how they interacted before. Gortash was probably equal parts annoyed and charmed by the Bhaalspawn's high eccentricity, his gaudy style and extreme bluntness and shamelessness- he thought he was fascinating enough to put up with his attitude, not to mention that he was reliable and got things done when he set his mind to it.

(More under cut)

Alas, DU Drow wasn't raised to entertain friendship or tenderness whatsoever prior to getting a clean reset to his brain - this doesn't change the fact that he is, by nature, a very intense man, and those emotions had to come out in one way or another. Hence his weird preocuppation with Gortash and how he made him feel. He is primed to become extremely conflicted in his feelings towards anyone who sticks around in his life as anything but a pawn or a victim, and Enver constantly tried to pose himself as a friend - arguably a even more baffling concept to DU drow than if he wanted to be a lover - because then he would at least be seeking out sex from their interpersonal exchanges. This is also why a lot of DU drow's focus when insulting/trying to torment him would have been sexually charged, besides a simple desire to shock and objectify himself and others as sacks of meat to be fucked and killed.

But Gortash grew up in literal hell, I think his capacity to withstand abuse from others (and swiftly brush it off) would have been extremely well honed, especially if it will ultimately get him what he wants. He never flinched at the guy's constant allusions to perversion and cruelty, likely rolled his eyes at it even lol. This would have been very disarming to DU drow and kept him coming back for more, and fostered (along everything else I mentioned) the admiration brought up in-game in that one letter durge writes to Bhaal. That letter would have been a very rare moment of clarity and introspection between DU drow and his father - perhaps the only entity he could ever disclose this kind of conflict to, much like a man having a crisis of faith is still likely to turn to the very god he's doubting for comfort.

I haven't yet decided how Gortash felt towards him, though, besides the aforementioned fascination mixed with irritation. I do think that after being tad-poled, when DU drow shows up in his coronation room looking so dramatically different from the man he knew (hair unkempt, clothes reduced to their practicality, shell shocked stare, the absence of his usual, lecherous grin) he would have thought what a shame that was, that this relentless beast he knew would never allign himself with someone beneath his caliber, often to the point of being unreasonable, had squandered his own ambition and was now in such meager company lol like he's got this half-elf girl just short of hanging onto his arm, this squishy wizard that he would have chewed up like hide in his teeth once, and the smug little elf? That's just his type, but the man Gortash knew had eyes for no one but his sister - regardless of how often he tried to warn him of her duplicitous nature. Ohhh what a mess she made of him, he wishes he remembered anything so he could at least say I told you so.

[thefamilyeldritchabomination]

Chapter Fourteen: Mr. Pinstripe Suit Pt. 2

Hohenheim had somehow made his way behind both Dolly and Freddy with a less than amused expression on his perpetual frowning face. Van Hohenheim of Light was one of the greatest alchemists of all times and creator of the philosopher’s stone, being called something demeaning as a ‘DILF’ offended him deeply. Though his anger was geared towards Freddy for the objectifying comment, Hohenheim’s eyes were trained on the one called ‘Dolly’. That was the one Envy had been hovering over and frankly this made Hohenheim concerned, especially from what he experienced from Dante. Hohenheim had to figure out what to do before having to play ‘hide and seek’ with the monster he made. Dolly on the other hand was concerned by the older man that looked like a middle aged William and wondered just what she was witnessing at the moment. On the other hand, Freddy was mouth agape and grasping to form any sort of words to this situation. Though it was a few minutes, the silent panic felt like it had been hours, making Freddy wish Envy was there since they were the murder monarch of Amestris. After a moment, Hohenheim decided to finally break the silence.

 “Do you know who I am?” Hohenheim whispered, his face radiating the aura of tranquil fury. “No? I thought you were checking me out for the tiger beard, please don’t murder me..” Freddy looked like he was about to pass out from the adrenaline pumping through his body.

 “I’m Van Hoheheim, The Light Alchemist. You have a lot of gall to call me of all alchemists a ‘DILF’ and frankly it disgusts me that I would objectify like that.” Hohenheim angrily introduced himself, his tone dripping with some pent up rage.

 “Shit…Dolly save me…” Freddy looked at Dolly for immediate help like teleporting the hell out of range of the enraged super alchemist.

 “I am sincerely sorry about Freddy’s mouth, he sometimes doesn’t think his words through and can be insensitive at times.” Dolly decided using words would be a better course of action instead of teleporting out of there. “Can he not apologize on his own?” Hohenheim asked in a disappointed tone. “He can but it’d be a tidal wave of incoherent words, so this is the best you will get on the manner.”  Dolly glanced over to Freddy who was frantically nodding to what she was saying.

 “Then may I ask what exactly is your relation with the one you call ‘Envy’?” Hohenheim tightened his grip a bit on both Freddy’s and Dolly’s shoulder, clearly this is where Envy got their shoulder gripping skills from.

 “They’re a horrible gremlin that torments me daily that calls me Face Fur and spreads horrible rumors about me in my workplace.” Freddy didn’t hesitate to air his grievances about the horrid booger monster that made his life miserable.

 “Wait, you mean that monster hasn’t attempted to murder you yet? It's just been lightly teasing you this whole time?” Hohenheim was taken aback that this was the only thing Envy had done.

 “Wait what..” Freddy was trying to grasp at the idea that hell Envy put them through was considered ‘light teasing’ rather than torment. “That monster kills people, for fun. With how you behave, I would’ve thought you’d be dead a whole lot sooner than this.” Hohenheim gave Freddy a very puzzled look at the fact he was still alive and breathing.

 “That’s really cruel to call someone an ‘it’..Envy most certainly isn’t a saint by any stretch of the imagination, but they don’t deserve to be called an ‘it’.” Dolly gave a bit of a disgusted look at Hohenheim over that terminology.

 “I take it that you were given a different treatment? You really shouldn’t place your trust in a monster, I know this one all too well and all the horrible things this creature has done.” Hohenheim had a bit of an air of knowing everything about their broken child even after the abandonment. “Sir, I was in the front roll seat when Envy had their murder rumpus on the train. Trust me when I say I already know Envy has done some pretty bad things, but lately there hasn’t been any mentions of murders. Sure there maybe was some maimings in the paper, but no murders. It might not be much, but it's still something.” Dolly was getting a gut feeling this was probably the reason why Envy hated their parents even before becoming a Homunculus.

 “Are you telling me that Envy, the Envy that caused a horrific petrification plague to a village, hasn’t been murdering people as usual?” Hohenheim was now intrigued with this little news as his eyes caught movement and an angry glare that turned into panic. 

 “Hohenheim of light, you let her go, NOW.” Envy growled, dropping the disguised voice for their preferred one as Envy scrambled for a plan to get Dolly away from this situation.

 “Damn it Envy, what about me?!” Freddy wasn’t thrilled with being left to the mercy of a bigger asshole. “I thought you were attracted to him?” Envy kept their eyes on Hohenheim, not wanting to look away for a moment.

 “My preference isn’t jackasses. Please give me a little more credit than that.” Freddy narrowed his eyes in offense at his dating standards being questioned.

 “Fair enough, at least you have better taste in men than that.” Envy felt a bit of relief that at least Freddy did have a standard when it came to dating. 

“I’m very surprised that you’re not attacking me on sight, Envy.” Hohenheim cleared his voice, a tad offended that he was forgotten for a little bit by his monstrosity.

 “I’m surprised too, but you know what Hohenheim, I’m right now in a good mood and I’ll leave you alone IF you let Dolly go along with the Face Fur as well.” Envy decided to use that magical thing Dolly does normally, talk it out, in hopes it would work.

 “The girl wasn’t joking, you really haven’t been acting like yourself…maybe you have been infected with a disease of your own making like super rabies…” Hohenheim, reasonably, was incredulous about the scenario and the oddly peaceful Envy had him on edge.

 “And this is why you don’t show kindness to jackasses, Dolly, this is usually how they react to any peaceful offerings I give.” Envy growled a bit at the reaction Hohenheim gave.

 “You did great though Envy! You’re using your words and that’s progress you should be proud of.” Dolly tried to reassure despite the odd hostage situation she found herself in.

 “My curiosity has been perked now. You may have the incredibly rude tiger man, but, I’ll be having a much more in depth conversation with the girl.” Hohenheim decided as he tossed Freddy to Envy to distract them long enough to haul ass out of there with a shocked Dolly being dragged along.

[weaselbeaselpants]

All you need to know about my sucky rewrite

Since the actual show’s getting greenlit here’s my sooperoriginal ideas of my reboot/rewrite/reimagine thing called “Happy hotELL”

The cast of “Happy hoteLL” are renamed versions of the Hazbin cast:

Charly, Vee (she’s nick-named “Vaggy” by Engel) Engel, Niftie, Hux, Alastair, Lord Satan and Lilian, Flim-Flam and JibJab, Karen Killjoy, Sir Pantsless.

The main villains would be human!archangels based on Estus Pirkle and Kirk Cameron.

The main demons under Charly all embody a deadly sin in how they ended up in hell: Engel = Wrath (hated himself and other people), Niftie = Envy (tormented people at school in order to impress a boy), Hux = Lust (stalked/objectified various women in his life), Vee = Pride (too proud to admit she made bad choices), and Alastar = Gluttony (for reasons already discussed here).

Setting

The “afterworld”, the setting our characters inhabit, is separated into three sections: HEAVEN which is where the Archangels rule and were “good” souls go; HELL, which is the main setting of the show and where the archangels swoop down to purge of all the “bad” souls that end up there; and LIMBO, a primordial pocket-dimension with no direct portal to through the other two worlds. Limbo turns out to be the place the archangels, the true rulers of Heaven, are hiding. The mortal or ‘human’ world is between Heaven and Hell and is accessed by similar means to how it is in Helluva Boss. 

Angels and demons which were never human are referred to as ARCHANGELS/OVERLORDS and CHERUBS/IMPS. Ascended/damned souls are those of people who’ve ended up in either Heaven or Hell.

Heaven and Hell both have class systems. Imps and Overlords and Cherubs and Archangels are SUPPOSED to rule over all the human souls in their care. But Heaven’s archangels have gone missing - abandoned their posts for the peaceful content of limbo - leaving human angels to rise up and over time dictate how Heaven is to be run and who gets redeemed....this is as bad as you think it is, as the human!archangels care only for their “purity” over everyone else and keep people who should be allowed into heaven out just for not being to their standards - like Vee. The Overlords of Hell are unaware of this and have been unknowingly doing the human!angels’ business for hundreds of years. 

>The implication that this system for disposing of evil souls has failed is made well before the second season twist because damned human souls (Alastair) have become overlords and exist in Hell without being purged as an open secret, even to Charly’s parents. The only reason the true Overlords oppose any of the human!Overlords’ reign is because it disrupts their order in Hell, not out of any sense of justice.

There is NO monotheistic deity in this world; angels and demons used to live in “pantheons”, aka tribes, across the earth where they created life and the ecosystems there as well - thusly, they became gods to the people of these regions too. Satan and Lilian are from what would come to be the Abrahamic angels. In time, other mythologies’ underworld counterparts - and even some benevolent gods - would have the power diminish on earth and they’d have to live in Hell if they didn’t want to be wiped out by the crusades the Archangel’s influence over humans. Understandably, a lot of non-Abrahamic angels and demons are NOT fond of this appropriation/erasure of their culture and want their own realm’s back, even trying to run their own redemption operation/afterlife control in secret or in limbo. (Imagine Charly meeting a Vivziepoped versions of Hades and Persephone or Oxhead and Horseface telling her to fuck off and her just being like “I KNEW someone had the same idea! I JUST KNEW IT! <3<3<3″)

ALL mortal souls are supposed to be sent to hell but a great many of them are KEPT from heaven because of the human!archangels. 

A demon is redeemed by either setting right a wrong they did in life or sacrificing their happiness for another. This is what happens to Vee at the end of the first season, which leaves Charly without a manager through season 2.

Satan’s backstory is a parody of Paradise Lost as he was the most beautiful angel in his pantheon before the others kicked him out. In revenge he took Lilian, their “first woman”, for his wife and rallied up an army which apparently ended with one mass-extinction event on earth.

There’s a section of Hell where demons who represent different vices/drugs live. It’s referred as “Viceland” and is treated like a kitty theme park.

Demons (overlord, imp, or damned-souls) can all be summoned by mortals who know their way with unholy magic. They’re summoned at really inconvenient times and for really worthless deeds and this would be a great source of comedy for the show and an excuse to get characters to the mortal realm.

Story

The first episode/pilot/episodes/minimovie/whatever would be basically the same as the pilot but with a few tweaks:

It shows a person dying, going to Hell, becoming a demon, and being purged (which the audience not quite knowing what just happened to him) with Engel happily takes the dead demon’s things once the dust clears. Then Charly and Vee’s limo pulls up to him and ask him if he’s interested in a “new gig”. Que title and credits.

Charly initially opens the hotel with the promise that it will be a place for vice and booze but lets it slip that it’s a front for rehabilitation. Once Engel’s story is picked up on by the network, Vee and Charly’s assistants (Flimflam and JibJab) attack Karen and destroy the news station.

It’s Engel - not Vee - who recognizes Alastair as the threat that he is - later it’s revealed that Engel was present during Alastair’s initial takeover and that his radio frequencies damaged Engel’s eye. Vee doesn’t believe him until she sees Alastair’s absorbtion powers, which is when she allows him to stay employed by the hotel to help take Alastair down.

Alastair stresses the need for Charly to keep him working with her a secret, ESPECIALLY from her parents. He’s technically a criminal in hell and he convinces Charly that her parents will be impressed with her bad deed once the jig is up.

The rest of Season 1 would probably be Alastair setting up the hotel while the main cast of demons become more aquainted with each other and the different levels of Hell.The end of season 1 would feature Alastair double-crossing Charly and consuming the hotel in his likeness while it’s hosting a demon’s ball - in the hopes of getting enough souls to reignite his takeover. Vee, Engel, and Charly manage to escape the hotel and Charly overpowers and defeats Al by destroying his microphone - thus releasing all the souls he’s trapped, and then destroys his physical form.

Season 2 would start with a face reveal of Satan, Charly’s father, as he forces her to eat Alastair’s heart which will put him under her control. She does, but Alastair’s conscience manifests inside Charly’s head and mocks her ideas throughout the season. Also in the opening Vee would become and angel and ascends for Heaven, leaving Charly to manage the now very popular hotel alone until Engel rises up to become her #2.

Season 2 would be more explorative, with more stuff featuring the demon’s lives as humans, Charly’s role in Hell, and even Vee in Heaven. We’d learn more about the way Hell, Heaven and Limbo work as Charly manages to redeem a couple more damned souls. At the end of the season, the demons discover a dead cherub with a message from Vee begging Charly for help. Charly first attempts to pass through the hidden realm of Limbo to get to Heaven, but Hux runs off with their means to get there, so instead she vomits up Alastair, the only other demon who knows how to get to heaven, and he assists them on the condition that he be granted amnesty once they return to Hell. In the end, Charly and co. discover Heaven’s corrupted state and realize the Archangels are missing, Vee looses her wings but ascends into a fallenangel, and they all escape the bloodthirsty angels due to Lilian’s interference.

The Overlords of Hell prepare for a new war with Heaven and Charly’s parents send her to the mortal realm for her protection. In the mortal realm, Charly and the demons disguise themselves and their base of operation as a bed and breakfast. Charly has trouble reeling in the overexcited demons who are out of place in this new time while also keeping Alastair, who has stashed away with her, from trapping souls. 

Halfway through season 3 Engel and the other motel staff find out Alastair’s human identity, which he was desperate to hide, and bring his now elderly human daughter to him. This causes Alastair to freak out and consume the bed and breakfast. Once Charly brings him to, his physical takes on that of a baby deer but his psyche and abilities are completely nulled.

While this is going on Vee, Hux, and Charly’s parents have their own adventures in Limbo where they meet the Archangels who have no idea how corrupt Heaven has gotten in their absence. It’s only through Hux and Vee that the main group is finally all reuninted in Hell where the finale takes place :

Engel and Niftie ascend into fallenangels and alongside Vee lead a brigade against the angels who now want to wipe out all the demons; Charly guilt trips her parents and the Archangels into taking action and combining their power to dismantle the angel’s weapons; Alastair comes back and personally takes out the main human!archangel and himself by throwing them into the center of Hell; big stupid happy lesbian ending fartjoke.

end

Characters

Charly’s relationship dynamic to her parents is flipped: her father, Satan (he doesn’t like being called Lucifer) LOVES her. He shares a lot of her personality and at worst doesn’t take Charly seriously or cares about her ambitions. Lilian, Charly’s mother resents her daughter. Lilian was hoping her daughter would bring forth the apocalypse but Charly doesn’t want to do that. It’s implied Charly’s optimism and need to help people comes from her father’s days as an Archangel, and her mother especially hates the angels for casting her out, which leads to her resenting Charly.

This doesn’t stop Satan from being genuinely impressed with his daughter’s achievements and for Lilian to be be the panicked-parent when she learns that Charly has broken into Heaven at the end of season 2. 

The Royal Family is not actively malicious. They’re more like privileged jailers on the top of the Hell-foodchain. The most evil things about them are their apathy towards human atrocities (and their subjects pain, of course), their occasional bouts of sadism, and their genuine glee at the thought of destruction - namely the apocalypse, which Satan and Lilian speak fondly about like a married couple would their retirement plans.

After Charly shows her true form while taking out Alastair, the other Overlords and Imps (i.g. Karen and 666 News) start heaping praise on her out of fear that she’ll retaliate for all the mockery they made of her when she unveiled her plan. Charly is uncomfortable with this.

Engel is BAD at his pornstar/sexworker career. He tries to sell himself as a sass-master incubus but can’t achieve this status in the demon hierarchy because of his short fuse and violent nature.

Engel thinks he’s in hell because he’s gay and likes crossdressing. In reality it’s because he was a member of a crime family and a murderous gangster, named Anatole Slinkoff. The first people he killed were his father and brother as he was assisting a young-up-and-coming rival who would eventually become his boss.

Speaking of that boss, Anatole fell in love with him. On Anatole’s birthday he and the boss got drunk and he ended up confessing his feelings. The boss invited a sobered up Anatole back to his flat the following week and seemed to return his affections with a kiss...which was then followed by a fatal stabbing. Engel never got over the heartbreak/betrayal.

Engel starts off as a toxic enabling jackass who lives in denial and uses sex and drugs to cope with how unhappy he is with himself. In season 2 he becomes Charly’s #2 and builds a strong friendship with her. Also in season 2 Engel meets his father, brother, and mother who are also in hell for their crimes. His father and bro amazingly forgive him for killing them while Engel’s mother - a god-fearing woman who would beat Engel if she found him wears makeup or playing with dolls as a child - asks him for forgiveness, saying she’s the reason her family and he specifically ended up where he did. After Engel patches things up with them he tries to locate the souls of the people he killed and in the process finds out his old boss went to Heaven. At first Engel sets out to kill his boss and get revenge, but upon actually finding him living in fear in Limbo, he can’t bring himself to do so and instead chooses to just not forgive him.

Engel ascends/becomes a fallenangel in the final season when he meets an imp with a similar taste of humor and style. Rather than rush into a relationship as he’s done with every person he’s got with since he ended up in hell, Engel tells his new lover he wants to wait until he’s stable for a relationship, which triggers his transformation.

Molly doesn’t exist. Molly is instead the name of Engel’s feminine alterego and later the name Engel takes up as a fallenangel.

Vee, like Engel, also thinks she’s in hell for all the wrong reasons: She ran away from her controlling parents, thinking she could live on her own just fine. She could not. Instead she wound up turning to a life of crime and prostitution to support herself after a plethora of bad decisions and heartbreaks. When her parents sent word out all over the country, begging her to come back and that they were wrong, but she still refused. In the end one of her clients ended up strangling her. Her soul SHOULD have been one that went to Heaven but was barred off by the human!archangels for being a “thug”. Vee tried to get herself purged after her first few months in Hell, convinced that she deserved it, but Charly saved her and the blast instead only took out one of her eyes. Vee and her story are Charly’s main inspiration to open up the hotel.

Vee and Charly obviously have a romantic relationship from the start but Vee doesn’t see their love as anything serious. When Vee becomes an angel at the end of season 1/beginning of season 2, she rather cruelly leaves Charly without a second thought and discards their relationship is ‘passing sin’. It isn’t until she spends more time in Heaven, seeing the other angels’ being restricted (including her parents, who admit to actually being miserable in Heaven) and finding her rejection notice from the human!archangels that Vee realizes she does love Charly and that her redemption was always HER doing, not someone else’s.

Vee makes the unwise decision to confront the Archangels (whom she doesn’t know are actually human souls) about this treatment. They respond by locking Vee away and performing a “purification” on her which is like electroshock therapy. This sedates Vee into a mindless drone, much to the horror of the cherubs, angels, and eventually Charly and the gang.

Vee, in her purified state, doesn’t want to leave Heaven and go back to Hell. Charly, realizing the woman she loves is gone, tearfully tells her she won’t ask Vee to be anything she doesn’t want to be and that she loves her. This confession breaks through to the real Vee. Their happy reunion is cut short however by the human!archangels who rip off Vee’s wings, causing her and Charly to fall. It’s here though that Vee again ascends, this time into a fallenangel, and grows her own pair of wings and an angels’ weapon which she uses to kill Perkins, the head archangel and save the rest of the cast.

Throughout season 3, Vee and Charly’s parents turn the Happy Hotel into a refuge for human souls and imps while the angels and demons prepare for new spiritual warfare. Vee also tracks down Hux and multiple other “lost souls” in Limbo in her search for the Archangels.

Vee commands Hell’s army alongside Molly and Niftie in the show’s final climax and she gets a happy ending running a shanty motel in Limbo alongside Charly.

In life, Niftie was a teenager who tried to grow up too fast and gave up her hobbies and interests to impress her childhood friend (whom she was in love with). By following the lead of a more popular classmate, Niftie became a bully who ruled her school’s social status. Then she learned that her “teacher” had been in love with the same guy and he was returning her feelings - which drove Niftie into a rage and she tried killing the both of them on their senior prom night. She tried running them over with her car, putting the girl in the hospital, paralyzing the boy forever, and ruining her reputation at school (for saying she couldn’t drive when she did; not for the attempted murder). The boy she loved hated her, and the rest of the school bullied her until she gave in and took her own life in the bathroom.

The other demons are especially sympathetic towards Nifty. Charly finds it horrible that she end up in hell at such a young age. Hux is very protective of her. However, Niftie is more self-aware than she appears; she acts more childish than she actually is because she wishes she was still a kid, but does NOT like being treated like a literal child - especially by Charly and Engel. She only warms up to Charly when Hux abandons her and she’s forced to be an authority figure under Engel while the group stages things out in the mortal realm.

In the mortal realm, Niftie ends up coming across her old hishschool friend, now an old woman in a wheelchair, who believes it’s her fault everything ended the way it did. Niftie tells the lady not to feel guilty and instead apologizes to her - which ignites Niftie’s ascension into a fallenangel.

Hux was a moderately successful show magician. Heartbroken by being unable to woo a woman he loved with his success, he turned to drinking and took up relationships with women who worked under him  - all of these relationships were toxic and Hux would break their hearts and ruin their lives. When Hux arrived in Hell it was during a purge. He found his original sweetheart there but she, not him, was purged, cementing Hux’s views of redemption and justice...that there is NONE.

Hux is mostly apathetic and disbelieves along with everyone else in Charly’s plan UNTIL he finds out that one of the women he hurt escaped into Limbo. When the main cast tried to use their one passage to Limbo to get to Heaven in season 2, Hux takes the pass for himself.

In Season 3, Vee finds Hux enjoying his time in Limbo and calls him out for his selfishness. Hux introduces her to all the women he wronged, who DON’T forgive him, and also his new business in Limbo selling drinks that make people recall their past lives.

Together with Vee, Hux thinks up a plan to have the overcrowded souls of Hell and Heaven wait out the war in Limbo while simultaneously kicking out the Archangels so that they won’t notice the influx of souls in their realm.

Sir Pantsless is the show’s biggest buttmonkey and is constantly abused. He’s a tiny demon trying to ride off other Overlord’s success and who’s design is a wimpy, trying-to-hard version of Charly’s dad. In life, Sir Pantsless was a Victorian-era businessman who lived a long, happy life of abusing child-workers in factories and getting away with all his evil deeds. Charly’s dad even admits to keeping him out of the purge purposefully because he finds Pantsless’ pain amusing.

Themes and other stuff worth noting

If there’s a lesson I guess I’d try to push with the ending of this rewrite it would be, ironically, that neither Heaven nor Hell hold your true morality. It’s on you for making mistakes; it’s up to you to overcome them - you literally have to go through hell - to fix them! It also shouldn’t be up to Heaven and Hell how punishment/enlightenment works or why it’s worth anything.

This is NOT supposed to be an antireligion/antiChristian story. Not at ALL. It’s anti absolutism and anti religiousSUPREMACY story.  I know then that people will probably not want me basing this version of Heaven off Evangelicals, but like Viv, that’s the religion that closest for me to criticize. If I were Jewish or Hindu or Muslim I would so be about tearing their hypocrisies down....but I’m not. I know all about the injustices in those religions but I’m not comfortable tearing them a new one as a white Christian. My mother’s fam are recovering Christian Science-folk. Also, have you watched anything about Left Behind? It’s genuinely an eye opening experience when it comes to Americanized Christianity and even the lore of Hell and Demons in regards to the book of revelations.

Lotsa references to The Divine Comedy and Paradise Lost with the implication that these works are fan fiction to the demons of actual events with Dante never even making it out of Hell because he was too prideful. (Charly’s father has two faces in his wings/comb which are constantly chewing parts of Dante like chewing gum).

I know Viv says she’s hoping to get Weird Al to voice Lucifer. Personally I think a better unlikely but TOTALLY FITTING devil would be mah man Martyn Jacques of The Tiger Lillies. They even have a circus motif!

Engel probably claims his name is supposed to be misspelled on purpose. In reality, it’s cause he was drunk when submitting his resume to be an incubus and made a typo for his new name.

Vee’s human name is Marianna Posada. GET IIIIIT.

Alastair’s human name is Edward Hastings. Edward being the name of the American Murder Song which inspired my Alastair, while Hastings is the last name of the man who helped doomed the Donner Party.

[whimsicalworldofme]

Worth the Fight

Unsettling news reaches Ava about Ben and his imprisonment at the hands of the Republic and she goes to Poe with an unusual request.

Word Count: 1723

Content Warning: Mentions of death and torture (nothing graphic)

Despite her delirious joy, the voice in the back of Ava’s mind for two weeks kept pestering her about Ben. She couldn’t help it. She knew he’d been taken prisoner by the Republic. There were even briefs through her datapad that the Republic released on their news outlets.

               Where are you? She reached out to him as she watched Luke trying to teach Poe how to fight with wooden sabers. Her husband was fully enjoying his retirement, taking the first two weeks without missions to do anything he wanted and that usually meant spending all his time with his family while occasionally tinkering in his new workshop. But as she watched her husband and her son, she felt something was missing, even though he’d never been there, Ben belonged there, with them.

               Don’t worry about me, the gruff voice answered.

               Too late, Ava replied. She watched her son twirl with ease, wooden saber in hand. He moved like a master with that little wooden blade. Poe kept up well enough, but he was more of a blaster guy. His affinity for dance helped him in this situation though. You should be here.

               No.

               Ben wouldn’t say anything more than that, ignoring her questions, going completely silent. It aggravated her that he was being so stubborn. But that was Ben. He hid how he truly felt to keep himself safe and sometimes because he thought it would keep others safe too.

               What are you trying to keep from me?

               He wouldn’t say, not that she thought he would. But she found out that night, reading the end of day briefs from the Republic. The headline, “War Criminal, Sith Lord, Kylo Ren, to be Executed.” Ava nearly dropped her datapad, her heart hammering against her chest, throat dry, eyes burning with the threat of tears. R2-D2 who had moved in with them and spent most of his days shadowing Luke, booped at her as he watched her set her datapad down. The little old droid had been following her around the kitchen that night. He liked to help her when she cooked, carrying around utensils, mixing bowls, or even some physical cookbooks she’d found. A lot of times though he projected the a holo version of a recipe she found on her data pad, reminding her of times and what step she was on. All in all, Ava enjoyed having the little droid in the house. But now she didn’t relish having to tell him the news. That the son of his beloved Princess was going to be put to death.

               “It’s bad news about Ben,” she said glumly.

               R2 let out a slow, mournful “whooo.”

               “I can’t just let them kill him,” she pushed her hair back from her face. She pressed her hands to her cheeks and sucked in a sharp breath. Poe and Luke were in the workshop tinkering with Luke’s speeder, trying to make some modifications. “Don’t tell Luke, ok?” She turned her gaze back down to the little droid who beeped and shook in affirmation that her secret was safe with him.

               At that moment, Luke came into the kitchen, face smudged with grease and reeking of engine oil, his hair tied back in a ponytail. Ava had offered to cut it for him if he wanted but he insisted he liked it long. He even put little braids in it sometimes, not unlike Padawan plaits though he styled his into his hair, instead of letting them hang from the side of his head. He had two braids running along the sides of his scalp today, tying into the ponytail.

               “You all right, Mom?” He asked when he saw her and Ava wondered how horrible she looked, if her expression had given her away. “Hey R2,” he greeted his droid with a fond pat on the head.

               “I’m fine,” she nodded. “Just a little bit tired. How’s your speeder coming?”

               “It’s all right,” Luke smiled, pulling a cup down and filling it with water, gulping it rapidly down. “Jaina is going to come over tomorrow to help reconfigure the controls.”

               “Just Jaina?” Ava raised a brow, trying to hide her fears about Ben with her happiness at her son having a girlfriend. They hadn’t said it out loud yet, but Ava had spotted Luke holding Jaina’s hand around base when they thought no one was looking.

               “Mom,” he groaned.

               “I’m sorry,” she cupped his cheek and laughed. “I won’t push or pry.”

               “I’m gonna go get a shower,” he blushed furiously before hurrying off upstairs.

               “Why don’t you go charge up, buddy,” Ava patted R2’s head as she made her way out of the kitchen towards the workshop. The little silver and blue droid booed and whirred his goodnights as he wheeled off. In the workshop, Poe was half hanging out of the front end of the speeder, his rear sticking out in the air, making her giggle.

               “I can hear you objectifying me back there,” Poe called out, laughter in his tone. He gave his hips a little wiggle just for her, making her laugh even more.

               “Can you bring the rest of your handsome self out here to talk?” She asked, standing beside the speeder, arms folded over her chest. Poe popped up and dropped to his feet. He too had smudges of grease and dirt all along his face and the front of his jumpsuit, which was his flight suit, now repurposed for working on ships, rather than flying them. His curls jutted out wildly and Ava couldn’t resist taming a few of them with a brush of her fingers.

               “You’re upset,” he stated before she could even say why she wanted to talk to him.

               “It’s about Ben,” she knew he wouldn’t be thrilled hearing that, but she had to do something. He didn’t scowl or roll his eyes, he didn’t even react negatively. He simply pulled a rag out of his pocket and began wiping off his hands.

               “What about him?”

               “He’s been sentenced to execution,” Ava bit her bottom lip trying not to cry. “He doesn’t deserve that, Poe. He deserves a second chance. Especially after all he did for the Resistance the last few months of the war. Sending all that information.”

               “So…what do you want to do about it? Jailbreak him, bring him back here, and re-raise him alongside the girls?” He paused, looking into Ava’s eyes for a long moment before gaping at her, eyes going wide. “Oh, maker that’s exactly what you want to do.”

               “Don’t you think he’s been punished enough?” Ava pleaded as Poe started putting away his tools, shuffling between the speeder and his tool chest. “All those years of torment from Snoke, all the agony of feeling abandoned by his parents, then the grief of what he did to his father, and losing his mother before he could make things right and say goodbye? Isn’t that enough? Isn’t what he did to help the Resistance in the end enough for him to deserve a better life?”

               “I don’t know, Ava,” Poe admitted, his hands on his tool chest, shoulders heaving as he sighed, head hung for a moment, shaking. “I feel bad for him when I think about when we were kids, when I remember he was my best friend. I feel bad for him when I think about how much Leia loved him and hoped for him to come home. But is it our place to say he deserves a second chance? Shouldn’t it be up to the Republic and the law of the people?”

               “They don’t know what he’s been through like we do,” she pointed out. “They don’t care. They want someone to blame and he’s the biggest target of them all.”

               “He killed countless people, sweetheart,” Poe shut his tool chest and turned around, leaning against it with his arms folded over his chest. “He tortured me, nearly killed Finn, who knows what all he’s done to Rey. It’s hard to trust him.”

               “He’s changed. He’s trying to go back to our Ben. The Ben we grew up with.”

               “How can you be sure of that?” Poe shook his head, wary and upset.

               He was gentle with her, never raising his voice or showing anger. Ava understood where he was coming from. She knew it wouldn’t be easy at all, bringing Ben Solo back into their world. But in her heart, she knew he needed for them to try. He needed his life to start again, not to die in a Republic prison, condemned by people who would never understand the hell he’d been through, what he’d overcome in those last few months, what was truly in his heart.

               “Because I know him. You know him too,” Ava laid her hands on her husband’s arms, sliding them down to find his hands, holding them tight. “We’re family, Poe. No one else is going to defend him.”

               Poe sighed heavily, swinging his hands slightly, in and out, running his thumbs along the backs of her hands as he mulled the situation over, not giving away his thought process. He licked his bottom lip, his head tilting to one side.

               “Leia wouldn’t have given up on him,” he finally conceded, shifting his weight from one foot to the other and heaving another sigh. “All right. We’ll go get him. I’m assuming you have a plan?”

               “Somewhat,” Ava nodded with a grin. She got on her tiptoes and pressed a soft, lingering kiss to his lips, making him smile and wrap his arms around her waist, his hands comfortably lower, pulling her closer into him. “Thank you.”

               “You’re welcome,” he smiled down at her. “It’s going to be a little weird, you know. Having Ben living in the guest bedroom. I assume that’s what you had in mind?”

               “Yeah, well we’ve never been conventional,” Ava chuckled. “But we’re family. And it’ll only be until he can be on his own safely.”

               “All right, well… you want Rey and Finn in on this? I can call them over for a family meeting.”

               “No,” Ava shook her head. “I think it should just be us. The fewer people the easier it’ll be to get in and out. We need a ship though.”

               “I think we can pull something together,” Poe grinned, an impish spark in his eyes. 

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