#like he does have debts but we dont know why

[gunpowder-tim]

ngl i have been listening to one eyed jacks a lot bc its on my jonny playlist (duh) and like i have 2 feelings -

1 his dad just wasnt there like he wasnt a horrible person or anything he just. wasnt there for him

2 trans jonny and like his dads not like saying hes his daughter but hes not saying anything to like be like oh yeh u r boy and then the first time he calls jonny his son is when hes fucking dying

[hauntingblue]

I loved this movie about nami and her ex situationship reconciling and also anti capitalism

[cassandraclare]

q&a

Alexa: Will we ever get to hear about Tessa's time in the Spiral Labyrinth? I think that would be so cool. 2) Why does Jem always say that the Carstairs owe the Herondales? I know that Jem feels that Will saved him when he was a child, but Jem saved will just as much as Will saved Jem. I'm curious if you have any more thoughts on that, like if it is just part of Jem's personality that he feels so keenly that he owes Will.

Sure, Jem saved Will just like Will saved Jem, but that isn't going to make Jem feel like he owes Will less, because indeed, that's not his personality (or Will's — Will would say the Herondales owe the Carstairs.) For Jem, this is a very pure feeling, that he will always owe this debt to Will and to the Herondales, and even though he wouldn't deny he also saved Will, he wouldn't qualify the statement — "The Carstairs owe the Herondales, though, you know, the Herondales also owe the Carstairs and so it's basically even but I'd still like to help out" because it would undercut the strength of his conviction. None of that means he doesn't know he did a lot for Will and Will's family too! As to whether there's more to Jem's belief that the Carstairs owe the Herondales than the obvious, we will have to see.

Anonymous:  THE SHADOWHUNTER CHRONICLES. I SEE YOU HAVE WICKED POWERS IN THE WORKS (NOT SOON ENOUGH).... FOLLOWING KIT HERONDALE AFTER 2012 ERA BUT HERES MY QUESTION.... YOU HAVE ALL THIS GAP BETWEEN THE LAST HOURS SET IN 1900S UNTIL THE 2000S WITH THE MORTAL INSTRUMENTS. WE, AS FANS DO NOT KNOW WHAT HAPPENED WITH THE CARSTAIRS ETC, SUCH AS AFTER CHAIN OF THORNS.... ...... YOU HAVE MANY MANY MANY GAPS HERE TO BE TRYING TO END THE SERIES..... SOOOO MANY UNANSWERED QUESTIONS WITH THE CHARACTERS. (AND YES IVE READ EVERY SINGLE BOOK).

Ack, the caps! Hello, friend. It is true that not every moment of every day of every decade has been described in a series, but that is fairly normal! We don't know exactly what transpires between Last Hours and Mortal Instruments (though we have many hints in the various short story collections, especially where it comes to the time of the Circle) — nor do we know what, for instance, was happening in the New York Institute during The Infernal Devices. With a big universe, you're never going to know what's happening in every place at every time. There will always be gaps; it's neither a bug nor a feature, more a natural consequence of the format.

I totally understand being like, "The Shadowhunter world cannot end with Wicked Powers, there are more stories to tell" but — whenever it all ended — there would always be more stories to tell.

princeash asked:

Hi Cassie!! So excited by the announcement! My question is, are we getting a Ash pov in tlkof?and could we maybe get a snippet of him 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 (also, I'm very happy about finally getting a release date and i dont mind waiting because i know you'll make it worth the wait!! 🤎)

Hello! We are not getting Ash's POV in TLKOF, unless something major changes. Ash is a bit of a mysterious figure for quite a while. Figuring out what makes him tick and what he's really up to is part of the fun. Also I'm working on not overwhelming people with so many POVs. :)

[nthspecialll]

When it comes to Abigail Marston leaving John in 1907, a lot of people throw mean comments at her, say that she was unfair for doing so and a lot of other things, however I think that people fail to consider the time that this game is set. This is not our modern day woman, this is 1907, and it might sound like I am stating the obvious but by the hatred that she gets it I think it needs to be said again.

1907!

Do you know the rights that women had then? Or the lack of. Women were bound to their husbands, they weren't allowed to own close to anything and were only allowed to vote in about 4 different states, some women that is. Women were seen as a servant to her husband.

It was also hard for women to earn money, the average woman over 16 working in a factory (as the majority was) earned 5-6 or 6-7 dollars a week, a week! Eggs on average costed 29 cents by the doz, a pound of round steak cost 15 cents and half a gallon of milk costed 15 cents as well.

What about rent? New Austin, which Blackwater and the surrounding area is in, is based of Texas which in 1904 had a rent per room pr month of 28 dollars.

So why would Abigail ever go through all of that? Because of John, because of Jack. Abigail stuck around John for eight years, practically begging him to fix himself, to become better because she knew that she was pretty much dependant on him, because she needs his support to be able to live and she wants to give her boy a chance at a better life but she can't with John constantly picking fights and literally putting her and her son's lives at risk.

A lot of people make it seem like she just suddenly took that chocie, but she didn't, it was a choice that most likely took her years not just due to the financial burden but also the social burden that comes with being a single mom in a time where pre-material sex was seen as a death sin. She could very well be killed merely for being seen with Jack and without a husband.

And not just that, but it was probably also a hard choice because despite of everything she loves John, she really does, yes she screams at him for going out with Saide but who wouldn't. "She won't allow him freedom," no she is scared he is going to die, for us it is easy to say "he isn't going to" because he is a main character and we can just redo if we die taking on twenty skinner brothers or whatnot, but it isn't like that for her. I want you to imagine that your partner/friend/parent told you they were going to fight a gang of who knows how many, you are going to be scared no matter how skilled that friend is because you don't want to lose them. John himself admits it is dangerous work by saying "we always find a way to almost get killed, dont we?" Which Sadie agees to.

Abigail took the choice to leave, putting herself in a terrible situation, not for herself, but for her son. She gave up her one true love so that her son could have a chance at life, have a chance to be better than her and John. It was not easy and it is not something we should shame her for, if anything we should praise her for putting her son before herself.

I love John, I really do, but I think it shows just how shitty of a father he really was, and that Abigail leaving was exactly the push he needed to get himself together, it was the wake-up call he needed. He knew how shitty women had it, he would have to realize how terrible he must have been for her to prefer that over him.

Now am I saying Abigail did everything right? No, she did not. Although I understand her fustrations with him doing bounties she has to realize she is not in a place to be picky about jobs. She did ask John to take on a huge debt for the farm and John is right in one thing "it is legal work that I can handle," and while the farm is taking some time to get up and running it is the best form of income that they have access to.

Now to talk about her annoyance with John going after Micah, it is understandable as it could trigger a decline to their former life of crime or just lead to straight up death. It is unnecessary, revenge is unnecessary, meaning that John is risking their entire life for "nothing." He argues back with "I am doing it for Arthur" but again, yes Micah killed Arthur but killing Micah wont change that, killinh Micah will not bring Arthur back nor put him in a better situation, it is revenge, it is not nessesary, it doesn’t do any good.

If John had died she would not only have lost her husband but also the farm, as women could not own property. I am not that knowledgable on debt laws in 1907, but I would imagine that in some way or another the massive debt John got would end up with her or Jack either way, putting her in a terrible situation.

@heavenlymorals made a similar post back in may 11th where they also explore and explain Mary Linton and Abigail in 1899, it is really amazing and also puts some other light on it.

Sources:

Rent, page 369: https://fraser.stlouisfed.org/title/annual-report-commissioner-labor-6306/eighteenth-annual-report-commissioner-labor-608452?start_page=370

Food, page 233: https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=umn.31951000014585x&seq=233

Wages, page 15: https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=nnc1.cu56779232&seq=15

[lynnthefrenchtoast]

The Tragedy of Qijiu; Analysis

aka: reason why Yue Qingyuan and Shen Jiu make me ugly sob

1. the things left unsaid

the most poignant part of the novel for this ship is this line: "Too late. It was already too late! Shen Jiu was no longer here. He would never again be able to hear Yue Qingyuan’s words, never ever.”

and again, in the character notes: "He (sy) is no longer the intended recipient of this favor. Yue Qingyuan will have to find his own closure, as the person he looks for behind the new Shen Qingqiu’s eyes will no longer return.”

READ THAT SHIT. READ IT. ISNT IT TRAGIC???

ygy and sj spent their whole lives since they were little kids with unspoken words between them, longing glances, misunderstandings and hidden affections. you know who else does that? THE MAIN COUPLE OF SCUMS VILLAIN: luo binghe and shen yuan.


EXCEPT

we get to watch them fix their misunderstanding. we get to watch binghe realize he was never hated for his heritage. we get to watch shen yuan realize he is saved from retribution for sins he never committed. this is a privilege qijiu never gets.

the worst part? they almost get it.

because yue qingyuan does, in (what he believes are) his final moments, try to communicate. it's the beautiful cliche "im dying so ill tell you everything" except its not beautiful because the person he needs to tell is GONE. he was gone the whole time and YUE QINGYUAN DOESNT EVEN KNOW:

2. YUE QINGYUAN'S SOULMATE IS DEAD AND HE DOESNT KNOW

is that not like INSANE???

like yeah, the person you love dying is tragic. but its even more tragic that they were so distant he cannot even tell shen jiu and shen yuan apart. he will never know his beloved is gone from the world; he is not even awarded the privilege to mourn

and he can NEVER know. sy is literally prohibited by the system from telling him. so happens is:

3. YUE QINGYUAN MUST FALSELY BELIEVE HIS SOULMATE REJECTED HIM FOR ANOTHER GUY

+

4. yue qingyuan fails shen jiu at each and every opportunity

can you IMAGINE? he got into cultivation to save his xiao jiu from the qiu manor. he failed. he became the leader of the sect to be a man shen jiu could one day respect. shen never respects him (even shen yuan canonically is like "dude wtf? this is the sect leader; shen jiu treats him so disrespectfullt?") . yue qingyuan tries to protect shen jiu from luo binghe - fails. tried to save him after receiving his two legs in the mail but failed and died trying. tries to save shen yuan - shows up too late and shen yuan gets poisoned without a cure. tries to take on debt for shen yuan - shen yuan wins the spirit stones. tries to fight mobei jun - fails and shen jiu falls into depression because he lost binghe due to his failure. tried to lock up a heavenly demon - succeeded! but that ultimately led to the birth of the even stronger heavenly demon who goes on to torture his beloved for a decade.

yue qingyuan is a man in power without the power to succeed at the one thing he needs to.

conversely, shen jiu, a little slave with no name or power changed his live. when yqy needed him, shen jiu selflessly stepped in danger's way and saved him successfully. yqy never repays his debt even though he tries so hard.

and then his xiao jiu falls in love with the young demon boy who wreaks havoc and kidnaps him and kinda treats him like shit. he fails at earning shen jiu's love too.

5. yue qingyuan never finds out that shen jiu loved him.

shen yuan likely believed yue qingyuan abhorred him. what shen yuan feels for yue qingyuan is likely a mix of "you betrayed me so i must hate you + you hate me so in return i must hate you. but in reality if you were to look close i dont hate you at all. but ill act like i do because i must hate you."

yue qingyuan though? there was no question. his feelings for shen jiu were always love and shen jiu will never know that, so there will never be a chance for shen jiu to change his mind, to not think "you do not hate me so i do not have to hate you, you love me so i can love you"

this kinda ties into the "words left unsaid" point EXCEPT at least shen jiu gets one time where he finds out how yqy feels. yqy never ever in any universe finds out. he thinks shen jiu is determined to never call him qi-ge again.

6. but even when shen jiu gets to find out yue qingyuan loves him, it is the most tragic way of doing so

i want you to imagine:

you love this person. you trusted them and they betrayed you. you hate that they make you feel weak so you place distance between you two. they look down on you so you respond in turn, with harsh words and harsher actions.

and then they die a horrific death- stabbed by ten thousand arrows- to come save you.

you realize they never meant to betray you, never looked down on you.

you were so mean and distant for nothing.

you cannot say sorry. they are dead. it is your fault.

shen jiu so eagerly wrote that letter to yqy, not because he wanted to escape torture but because he was so confident yqy wouldnt come.

he didnt come last time, so why did he come now!?

EXTRA

they are the epitome of the childhood friends to lovers & "i loved you all along" trope. they have seen each other in every stage of their loves and still, in their convoluted way, loved each other even with all the tension between them

golden retriever x black cat

yue qingyuan totally spoils shen qingqiu. if he tolerates that level of disrespect? yk damn well qing jing peak is never short of funding

shen jiu really is in desperate need of being loved. he like, is a character that claims he doesnt care to be liked but we all know its human nature to want to be appreciated and loved. "i dont need you to love me" "i love you" "oh"

the potential for a: "i dont need your pity" "its not pity i just care about you" or a "why do you even care?" "because i love you" or a (as catra and adora say) "i know you all hate me!" "i never hated you" dialogue drop

the potential for a deku -> izuku moment. i mean yue qingyuan literally canonically foreshadows it: "are you so determined to never call me qi-ge again?"

misunderstood x "i see past your mask" (ive written more about this dynamic in my lynaether post tumblr wont let me link but the in summary: blablabla human desire to be understood and human tendency to self sabotage and hide your flaws yada yada "i hold the ugliest parts of you up to the lie and dont even flinch")

FEEL FREE TO ADD UR EXTRA BULLET POINTS IN THE COMMENTS

[withonly-sweetheart]

all that money's tempting... gosh. re4 og leon tries to distract you from the one thing you think could solve all your problems. nsfw mentions (duh) below <3

idk if this is like noncon or wtv it doesnt feel like it to me but theres a part where theres a misunderstanding or shit idfk i dont care im just tired and want this OUT of my head please.

<><><><>

it's asking you to grab it, you swear. if money had a voice it would be high-pitched and whiney, whispering foolish promises into your ear. beside you, leon nods at the watch commander as he exits the room, reasons as to why being unknown to you.

your focus is on the money, the wads of cash stacked neatly on the simple brown table. you imagine it wavering under the weight, unworthy of carrying what could quite easily, you argue, fix all life's problems.

"what would you do with a million dollars...?" you ask, at first absentmindedly but then straightening up as the other two in the room toss their stoic gazes to you immediately.

"we never go there, rookie," leon hisses. "too many officers lost that battle."

"but theoretically-"

"no 'theoretically'," the other officer, one of leon's colleagues, spits. "you know better than that."

"she was just-" your training officer attempts to defend.

"you siding with her, kennedy?" the guy raises an eyebrow. "didn't think you were up for that life."

"the life of crime you came from?" leon seethes in reply. "i seem to recall your multiple violations and all the favors you called in." he frowns. "from me."

that shuts the asshole up pretty quickly, and you have to smother a smile as you gaze up, admiration twinkling in your eyes as you stare at his side profile. handsome and sharp. lucky you.

you suppose the only downside to the whole arrangement is the way he switches up, two different people forced to occupy the same body; and you'd rather have the calm one over the shouty one.

the officers' radios go off, the watch commander's voice coming through. he calls in an attempted break in somewhere near our units, and tells someone to respond.

you look between both of them, waiting for someone to make a move. leon crosses his arms and huffs, leaning back against the supporting column. the other officer rolls his eyes and grumbles something under his breath as he approaches the door.

"what was that?" leon calls out, sarcastically, if anything.

the only response he gets is the loud slam of the door, frightening some poor bird perched on the birdhouse stuck to the window. it doesn't flutter back, no matter how hard you stare.

"well?" you divert your gaze back to the money, at first, then to the man standing next to you.

"hm?" you ask, slightly in a daze.

"you asked what i would do with that money, but what would you?" leon scoffs. "after all, it's not like you to ask without a motive."

"does everything require a motive, officer kennedy?" you ask, teasingly, tantalizing his mind. he narrows his eyes.

"i asked a question, rookie."

a dreamy sigh falls past your lips. not the reply he was expecting. "i would pay off all that student debt, and buy myself a nice house. ooh, and a fancy sports car!"

leon snorts to this, and you turn to him with accusing eyes. "what?"

"i'm just saying, you've got a lot to live through if that's all you're hoping for."

"what part of paying off debt is useless?" you demand.

"i never said anything was useless." he shrugs.

you grit your teeth and turn away from him, but your eyes are once again drawn back to the money. you take a step closer, fingers itching to just pocket a few rolls, wondering if anyone will notice.

leon's arm acts as a bar across your waist, covered in black tactical gear, and his rifle slips from his other hand. the sound snaps you out of your trance, and you turn to glare at him.

"i wasn't going to take anything," you protest.

the corner of leon's mouth turns up. "oh, really? try fooling me twice, sweetheart. i know the look of a hungry woman when i see one."

"i'm not... hungry?" you tilt your head, confused by the metaphor.

"never mind. i think i'd retire early, if i had all that just saved in the bank. why spend my years wasting away, like i did in my youth?" he chuckles fondly, as if those years were millennia ago.

"you're barely forty," you deadpan. "you're not that old."

"compared to you?" leon's arm hasn't left its position, if anything pressing harder down onto your waist, forcing you back. there's a conflicted storm swirling in his eyes, unchecked by you. "i think i am."

"right... what are you doing?" you whisper.

"i see those eyes," he mumbles. "you can't stop thinking about it, can you?"

"the money? no, leon, gosh, i swear i wouldn't-"

"wouldn't you?" his voice is his own harsh whisper in your ear, backed against the table, the empty one that has no expectations except dreading what comes next, because what happens?

in the carefully planned sequence of your life, all the events that you'd prepared for, this is NOT one of them. never was supposed to be. and so because you've never studied anything like this, you freeze up.

leon feels you tense underneath him. "what's... wrong?"

"can you... uhm... get off me?" you say, voice squeaky. "please?"

"oh." leon blinks down at you, and the second time something seems to register because he clambers off, dusting his pants as a filler motion, trying to make the atmosphere casual. "s-sorry."

"n-no, you're fine," you say, reassuringly, but your voice is wavering. not out of fear, out of adrenaline. your body was preparing, it seems. it wants this. you want this, and you might've just ruined it.

you also never imagined anything happening here, in this drug dealer's home, where anyone could burst through the door at any given moment, but he's gotten enough blood rushing to your head that you can't stop the force of events that come tumbling next.

there's a whole list of words you have to describe him now, and they all fall past your lips as his fingers creep further down, duty long forgotten. you suppose that's the whole reason he's doing this.

for you, all for you, to distract you from ruining your life thinking you're going to fix it, when you'll only make things worse. besides, the desire for him is stronger than the desire for a nice life.

a life with him would be nice, you think, absently.

"oh, would it now?" he muses against your neck, damn fingers never moving any lower than they are, pressed taut from the force of your pants, against the lower skin of your stomach. "you wanna be mine forever?"

god, yes, you think, and this time you make sure it's just a thought. the last thing you need is for his inflated ego to get ahead of him.

"he was being so mean to you, baby," he whispers, and it takes you a moment to clear the cloudy thoughts and realize he's talking about the other officer. "never liked him anyway."

you nod your head for lack of a better response, immediately leaning back as soon as leon's other palm flattens against your inner thigh, sparking up your spine.

"you like that?" he says, low and breathy, just for you to hear. "what if someone was to come in, hm? what then? they see you all spread out like this, almost about to cum on my fingers?"

"yeah," you whine, and for the first time in a long time, you're really not ashamed of the sounds he elicits from you. usually sounds of dissent, now pleas for more. "need it, please."

you wait for his acceptance, for him to push you over the edge, just like he does every day out on patrol, except this time you know you'll like it. but it never comes, and you crack open an eye, panting.

leon blinks, and you swear that if he was a dog his ears would be twitching, because within a second he yanks his hand away, covering your arousal with his other hand, and you're confused for a moment.

you sit on the table as he stands to attention, facing the door. you don't realize why until the entire squad storms through, rifles aimed at the ready.

the watch commander raises a fist and everyone lowers their guns. "the neighbors reported loud noises and disturbing sounds. did you happen to hear anything?"

"... no sir." leon says, shaking his head in such an affirmative way that you can't help but copy his actions, bobbing your head up and down with a bright smile.

"we didn't hear anything," you add. "must've been a raccoon or something."

sergeant's eyes flick between you two, narrowing in suspicion. "of course. a raccoon."

"what else could it be?" leon says with a shrug.

"i have my suspicions." with that, he turns on his heel. and you think you're in the clear, about to let out a sigh of relief, when he jerks back.

"is something the matter, sergeant?" you ask sweetly. but his eyes aren't on you, thankfully. your heart plummets when you track his gaze to his true target.

"officer kennedy." there's an undeniable hint of irritation that is quickly overshadowed by the authority in his stance as he slowly turns around, eyes flitting to his waist.

"yes, sir?" leon's damn good at acting, but you're sure no musical will get him out of this one.

"what's in your hands?"

series masterlist

[flowerfreya]

Dr. Dad

part 1

This picks up where we left off from part 1. I am still learning how to link post and such so cut me some slack please lol

Pairing : Simon "Ghost" Riley / Reader

The reader is a 5th year resident that just had a baby with Simon who is an Attending. The reader does not want anyone to know that they are together until she makes fellow at the hospital.

He lets out a little smirk. His face turns serious for a moment. 

“My love know you don't have to come back to work so soon”

You sigh you knew that was coming. He’s been saying this since you told him that you were going back to work last week after you placed Bella into her bassinet. He was silent for a while just standing in the doorway of the bathroom. 

Looking at you. 

Assessing you. 

Trying to think of something to say to convince you not to do. 

 You had a relatively easy birth, having the birth of the baby at the hospital closest to your home and not the one you work at. It's not that you don't want anyone to know about you and Simon but , the relationship started when you were on his surgical rotation which is not allowed. You did let HR know about the relationship after you were off his rotation and the start date of your relationship officially is when you started your oncology rotation, which you really needed support for anyway.

When you fell pregnant you told Simon almost immediately. It was not an ideal time , you were a fifth year resident with little to no time on your hands , drowning in student loan debt, and you're barely making 60k a year. Simon on the other hand is an attending physician with over 6 years of experience in the field and 3 years working at the hospital. He was happy and together you let the medical director know about the relationship and pregnancy and those are the only people you told. 

When you started to show , there was a lot of rumors surrounding you.

It has to be one of the other residents , its the xrays tech baby , she always gets her patient pushed to the front 

You did nothing to dispel the talk, much to Simon’s disagreement.

“Let me say something”, he says one night after a 16 hour day. 

“You can say something , just don't say that your mine” you say 

You have an issue with being hyper independent, you realize that in fact a little to much. You love Simon but you let him know that you will be a working mom , you will be keeping your last name, and no one will know that you are dating Simon until you make Fellow , which is why you need to get back to work. 

Your mother was a godsend and also retired so when you called and let her know you were going back to work she didn’t try to convince you not to do it she just ask,“how can I help.”

 A knock on the door brings you back to the present. 

You sigh and proceed to unlatch the breast pump and hand them to Simon. He has a mini fridge and you dont trust these other residents to not fuck with your milk. 

Another this time harder and longer 

“One Second” you say brightly. While Simon glares at the door while towards it to unlock it. 

One of the 3rd year residents walks in and looks a little a pale. Lets you know that Graves is looking for you.

"Does he seem upset", You don't really care if he is but you would like to prepare how preppy you should act towards him. You firmly believe in killing people with kindness especially when it has to do with Graves who probably drinks Interns tears for breakfast , lunch and dinner.

"Is he bother you?", Simon ask. To anyone else it sounds like a normal question one of concern from a colleague. But you know he's worried he ask the question like it pains him from going to find Graves and tell him to lay off. No one likes Graves but he technically isn't doing anything wrong , he has the right to kick anyone out of his OR, to make interns scribe all his charts , and terrorize his residents until they rather to scut work then be in presence.

"Nothing that I can't handle" , you smile at him and then look to the resident that was sent to retrieve you.

"I'm right behind you", the resident turns and just about runs out the room.

You hand the milk to Simon and place a quick kiss on his lips, he makes an almost groaning sound and drags you back for another kiss , a deeper kiss with his hand tighting around your hips. You pull away with a little giggle, "I miss you too" you say , your eyes lowering that makes it known exactly what you miss.

You straighten your clothes back up , make sure that you don't look at tired as you seem and head out to another 4 hours of running around like you are fresh intern right from medical school and not a tired mom that just wants to sleep on the couch holding your baby.

[rnn11203]

The entire yumi-kiryu-nishiki thing in the end of kiwami makes no sense to me at all and makes me want to gag.... and RGG fumbled kiryu and nishikis story hardcore, so much in fact that they REDID it in LAD7 between Ichiban and Masato. The way Nishikis story is literally about Kazama and Yuko but they dont acknowledge it at all is insane to me. His inability to live up to kiryu, and his failures in protecting his sister… like rlly we just went no where with those plot points? His driving forces? I feel its barely touched on.

It's interesting that Nishiki himself doesnt view kazama personally at all (thati know of)(in game at least) if he so strongly feels that kiryu is his better half than why doesnt he feel any way towards kazama? At most kazama is just an obstacle in his way towards the seat of chairman. Yet kazama himself feels like hes a guidance figure for nishiki?!?! In yakuza 0 nishiki tells kiryu that he doesnt have to do any of the stuff that hes doing to appease kazama, that hes fine being himself and that he doesnt owe kazama anything. It’s interesting that he clearly doesnt feel the debt that kiryu does.

The only real scenes we get with kazama and nishiki are in the Tojo headquarters. Where nishiki and shimano expose the missing 10 billion. Where kazama looks at nishiki in scorn and nishiki stares back, smug? It feels almost playful. Cheeky even. Later, nishiki attempts to snipe kazama. He describes the experience as his hands couldnt stop shaking, because he knew deep down it was wrong? Because he held some sort of affection for him?

I dont think so. I think it was thrilling. That he wanted to and always had wanted to. I always liked to think that Nishiki found out what the orphanage really was. A place where kazama dumped his guilt. This is more headcanon territory but i like to think that nishikis family was wealthy and comfortable. I think part of his greed stems from feeling like he deserves it. Maybe he does in a way. But i think finding out about the blood on kazamas hands just made him think of kiryu. How kiryu called that man his father. The man that killed his birth parents. And yk what? I think what bothered him the most that he knew kiryu wouldnt have even cared. That it would always be kazama, above all else.

Who did kiryu care about more than anything else? Who was he putting above everyone? Even himself?

Kazama.

(Secretly…. I love kazama… but dont tell anyone!)

[sunfiltersthroughwillowleaves]

who would read a fluffy xianle quartet fic with added fluff and maybe a lil more fluff

includes: shi qingxuan convincing mu qing to crossdress with him, a very awkward sleepover where everyone in the xianle quartet invites their best friends and he xuan and shi qingxuan see each other and start making reparations, feng xin and mu qing teaming up to try and win the heart of the crown prince only to also fall for the ghost king, homophobia in the heavenly capital, and much more! (if it gets written idk if i will)

i might just start planning out the sleepover at paradise manor below the cut...

ok so mu qing, after crossdressing with shi qingxuan, invites him

xie lian's like "ok i guess i cant invite sqx who do i invite?" he ends up inviting ling wen, who is relieved for a break, and yushi huang, bc she did help them overthrow the government last time i guess

feng xin has no friends. he invites pei ming in the end because why not

hua cheng invites he xuan because yin yu said no, and hua cheng has no other besties

so the party is xianle quartet, the remaining Cancers, shi qingxuan, and yushi huang

pei ming has the wonderful idea to play spin the bottle, shi qingxuan agrees bc at this point he knows mu qing has a crush on xie lian and hua cheng

xie lian has no idea what spin the bottle is, but shi qingxuan goes first bc hes kinda besties with everyone here (except the ghost king), lands on yushi huang, gives her a lil peck on the cheek. pei ming goes "hey! thats not how you play! you have to kiss them on the lips actually!"

he is ignored.

next is hua cheng, who spins, and thanks to his incredible luck, lands on gege! kisses him on the lips and hands it to he xuan.

he xuan does not spin the bottle.

next is pei ming, who spins it and lands on ling wen. the immovable glare she affixes him with is enough to make him back off. she leaves the circle and goes to sleep on one of the couches at like 11 (there are many couches in paradise manor bc hua cheng needs something to kiss xie lian on)

pei ming complains that he gets to spin again because he didnt kiss anyone, but no one listens bc no one wants to kiss him lol

next up is yushi huang, who lands on pei ming. she starts by wiping off his cheek with a wet towel, her lips barely making contact with his cheek, then wiping off her lips with a different towel. pei ming is very embarassed and red.

then we got feng xin, who is very scared. he lands on he xuan. uh oh. he walks a lil closer. then a lil closer. he kisses his own hand and pats he xuan on the shoulder. the glare that he xuan is wearing is very very very scary. he is very scared. like hes about to pee himself. but at least. he managed it. pei ming doesnt comment surprisingly.

mu qing is next (of course they sat next to each other guys), who lands on xie lian. oh no oh no oh no. he leans over. kisses xie lian very very quickly on the cheek. he is very very very very red and blushing.

yeah mu qing will get murdered if he falls asleep at the sleepover.

now it's xie lian's turn. everyone wants to kiss him for different reasons except he xuan, so of course that's who he lands on.

xie lian knows this is platonic except hes not really friends with he xuan??? and also the tension between he xuan and shi qingxuan has been physically (whats the touch version of audible?), so hes very nervous.

"you dont have to do it if you dont wanna gege"

"yes he does!" shouts pei ming

xie lian kisses his finger and taps the Supreme on the cheek.

yeah, he xuan's debt is getting increased for that.

ANYWAYS might update this later bye, lmk if youd read this

[intertexts]

OK HI. HELLO ROS <3 standing in ur doorway like this 🧍 listen i will read worm eventually i just have so much HAPPENING. ALL THE TIME RIGHT NOW. AND DONT HAVE THE TIME. and also jrwi has me in a chokehold u know how it b. ANYWAY. i need u 2 tell me as much about new haven wards as u can without like major insane spoilers for worm. little spoilers r ok. i watch/read everything with a few lil spoilers 2 look forward to anyway <3 i know nothing abt the universe of worm (<<has barely made a sizeable dent in it but god i will i prommy) but i wanna know what exactly nhw is about. how does the universe work. how do the powers work. what is the situation with the nhw how and why are they working together where did they all come from!! gimme the nhw lore!!! as much as u can!!!!! looking at u with the biggest saddest wettest eyes rn pls pls pls infodump abt nhw 2 me!!!!!!!! ros pls 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

HIII HI HI WHISKEY <333 UR INSANE FOR ASKING THIS. BTW. literally insane. grabbing u so hard by the shoulders there is a crazed look in my eye. anyway. FIRST i am tagging @stuck-in-the-ghost-zone here also!!!!!! bc it is his au as much as mine & i am NOT qualified 2 talk abt nhw mark n such. augh.

ok. ok. ok. new haven wards. putting the cut here.

so the basic movement of worm is that powers are from trauma. ridiculously simplified, but that's the base of it-- if you have superpowers, you have them because you went through traumatic events so severe to you specifically that it broke ur brain a little bit. the powers manifest in some way as a reaction to the traumatic scenario. (it is also more complicated than this. playing the spoiler card.) OR secret second option u put urself into indefinite debt to an extremely shadowy and ominous.... organization? person? shadow government branch? conspiracy? and get superpowers in a can, with like, a 10% chance they'll backfire and mutate u into some fucking terrible inhuman shit and then they'll completely memory wipe you and brand you and dump you off somewhere. not really relevant here. because the main way of getting superpowers is to be violently traumatized, cape society in worm tends to be grittier, more violent. there's more villains, the heroes are less shiny marvel or dc and more making whatever moral compromises they need to get the best outcome possible. at one point one of the main heroes in the city worm takes place in tells the sixteen-year-old protagonist "i don't care, there's a kill order out on them, just put a bullet in her brain if you see her, it's fine" and then a while later goes "yeah i'd vote for a kill order out on you guys too," directly to her face. worm is always going "hey, wouldn't it fucking suck if superheroes were real?". there are many horrifying and inhuman and violent threats. sexual and racial and physical violence aren't swept under the rug. these seventeen year olds are sent to crime scenes where flayed and gutted corpses are suspended from the ceilings because they're heroes! ^_^ but this aint about worm this is about the new haven wards!!!!! [wards are the child soldiers junior hero branch of the main syndicated/unionized hero organization, w/ placement in every major city alongside regional protectorate headquarters]

>key things for this au:

--william wisp changed his last name to bell when he moved to new haven (where his brother david lives :) and joined the wards, for another layer of anonymity ^_^ (he is. severely paranoid about his identity & privacy. <- also a Big and Heavy thing in worm/parahumans world. it's a Big Fucking Deal to unmask a cape regardless of their alignment)

-dakota never got the mechanical heart & biomedical augumentation so didn't meet mato cole at that time! he's still dakota damascus :]

-virion... idk why he's still virion & not vyncent actually. probably just because that was the name his parents gave him? we can't change it now though nhw virion & canon vyncent r two different guys to me...

-ashe is the unluckiest fucking guy in the world!!!

their powers are a little different from canon both bc of the ways powers work just being different frm how they do in pd & also because of the "they're always a reflection of the worst moment of ur life that you're just dragging around with you reminding you of it" thing. <333

wibby / whisperer is a breaker/shaker (<- power classifications meaning he has another form he shifts into, and also an area of effect] in his breaker form (crackling white-blue energy) he 1) can control how corporeal he is, or *how* corporeal he is, from "walks into the brick wall" to "doesnt notice there's a brick wall and goes straight through it", to "goes incorporeal to stick his hand in a guy's chest then resolidifies to instakill him" w/ some tradeoffs. & 2) shape/control energy manifestations in a fairly wide radius around him, where the power of the shaped energy is in proportion to the amount of recent death in the area-- if there's a ton of casualties in the area, he can do a lot more than he could in a peaceful small town in the middle of nowhere. the situation with his trigger event was him. growing up socially isolated and half convinced he was going crazy and everyone else Also thought he was fucking insane (deadwood is still haunted!! more haunted :]) for years & years + the loneliness + frustration + unsureness if he's actually the one just. losing it or if it's all really real + the constant feeling of being in danger, that the town is bad and malicious and out to Get you. anyway. he fell, take that as ambiguously as u do for that in canon, didn't die, but was severely injured & couldn't move. just laid there for maybe a day or so in the woods that wanted to kill him. anyway he triggered when he was found! the catalyst was not "the place that's been out to get me my entire life finally succeeded" but the helpless incandescent frustration of "actually nothing i ever do is going to make you understand. i've been trying for so fucking long to make you See It but you won't!!! you never will and you just think i'm crazy or stupid or making it up for attention even though it has such obvious fucking consequences and is manifestly Real!!" he was recruited to the wards by miss g herself, who was like hahahhahaa this kid could be a Really Fucking Big Problem if he doesn't have an eye on him!! ^_^ he never wanted to be a hero, and still doesn't, really, but he's terrified of accidentally hurting people & deadwood is like a weight around his neck and maybe things will be better if he just gets out of here. for a while they're not, of course. he just feels like. y'know. he's another sick thing that crawled out of deadwood, and his powers make that obvious. the way they interact with recently dead shit makes him sick!! living with david is awful-- a big, lovely, lonely high rise apartment, an older brother who barely bothers to speak to him, calls to their mom through the walls going "why is he here? why would you send him here? can he like, go anywhere else?"

virion sol / imprint is a trump (meaning his powers interact With other capes powers.) he can copy powers by touching other parahumans-- the copied power is just as strong as the original, whatever the original is, but he doesn't have an innate sense of how to use it; he can easily be overwhelmed or overstimulated by powers that involve a ton of sensory input, or accidentally loose cannon something he wasn't expecting and can't easily control. regardless, this is a fucking insane power to have. it's so cracked. like within the parahumans-- world, this is something so rare, especially being able to copy the full strength of the power. the very few examples in canon of something similar, the copied power is always inferior. his situation was similar to canon-- the greats were a team of independent heroes, & were like, extended family to virion. he grew up unpowered, but in the cape world-- so many aunts and uncles teaching him security, standard protocols, how to fight capes, how to run cape business and independent team business, how to handle guns and tasers and safely run background checks. y'know. a family's worth of professional knowledge. he never really wanted to be a cape, anyway, he was more than happy to do all the unpowered stuff at home that needed to be done. occasionally he came with them on patrol n stuff or snuck out to watch them. the greats' long term goal was prying out the lich, an extremely heavyweight warlord who had control over most of the city. virion's father struck a deal with the lich-- virion knows as little what the deal was For as he does in canon, but he double crossed the entire team. virion snuck along to the confrontation with the lich (setup) & watched his father turn & murder all of them. still not sure if he did it all himself or just watched as the lich's minions did it, but the way they knew all their weaknesses, how efficient and brutal and unexpected it was-- it was his dad feeding the information. virion stays frozen in shock and horror & hidden during all of this. can't do anything to help. is fucking useless, despite all he knows and has done. for the first time in his life, he wished he had powers, that ram and min and everyone could have taught him how to have and use their powers like they taught him everything else. he triggered watching it all happen. after this, he went on the run, terrified that someone would Know that he saw, that they'd be coming for the loose ends, that his dad would come back for him. all he has of his family is a couple piecemeal things he could grab before he ran-- ram's favorite revolvers, a holy medal of alphonz's, some of his mom's sturdy jewelry. anyway, he ran, moved to a different city, new haven. started figuring out his powers, started targeting specifically other capes who were up to bad shit-- minor to mid league villains, the occasional local hero who would Look squeaky clean, but after their sudden death dirty secrets would come out, etc. all very low-key, very subtle. none of the disappearances or deaths looked related. during this period he is SO fucked up. he is so fucked in the head. he's incredibly hypervigilant and paranoid and jumpy (good at looking unbothered and still clocking every single sound and movement and always facing doors and windows), mired in the grief and guilt and horror at. watching his entire family slaughtered and life shattered in a night. sleeps for no more than two hours or so at a time. even on top of the lich and his dad... what he's been doing puts an even bigger target on his back. doesn't have time or heart for anything but the dirty work. is dissociating through the periods of time where he's not actively hunting someone down or on the job. silhouette is the one who puts the pieces together-- of course he's on the protectorate (hero organization) radar. sure he's only been targeting bad guys, but how clean each one was? how well covered they all are? how whoever this is has allegedly killed at least almost two hands' worth of capes in cold blood by now? sets off alarms, if you're looking!!

anyway, silhouette tracks him down, says hey, i know who you are, i know what happened. you're just a kid. you join us, and you'll gain the resources and skill to be able to get revenge. aren't you tired of running? now... virion took to this fast and well when he did, but. before it all, he was just a teenager. despite the family business, he was just some guy! he helped his mom cook and got help with schoolwork at the kitchen table and his cool aunts took him out for lunch. he never wanted this or expected it. and of course he doesn't trust the heroes farther than he can spit, but... it's something. it's better than this. anything has to be better than the way he's driving himself into the ground. & also, of course. if silhouette can find him. anyone else who's looking for him can too. (i don't think he's even registered on the radar of anyone. his dad didn't actually survive the lich, obviously, & he was the only other one who really knew abt virion + nobody knew he triggered. he's just. so fucking paranoid.)

dakota damascus / failsafe is a thinker/mover. he 1) has a precognitive sense of any pain that anyone in a radius around him will feel in the next short amount of time. this is-- varyingly difficult to block. he can't just Choose not to feel it, although the intensity of the feeling, again, varies. mostly proportionally to how severe the pain actually is, or how many people are hurt, but, with time, he can dull or sharpen it + follow the threads of it to discern Who exactly is in pain, rather than just an ambient sensation. 2) is VERY fast & has matching enhanced cognitive speed. these two abilities work SO good together, both in combat situations & also just day to day patrolling. man. i love dakota. anyway, he triggered young-- he was out with his parents (maybe 7/8) and they got caught in an attack by siberian-- a genuinely indestructible, incredibly powerful villain who can just,,, run her hand through a concrete foundation like it's butter & collapse buildings, or scoop out peoples insides in a heartbeat. and also likes to eat people, like, raw and bloody after dismembering them. whatever level of ultraviolent shocking horror u are imagining. double it. anyway. they got caught in the scene of this attack, dakota got separated from his parents in the panic and stampede and rush to get out-- he's seven! it's terrifying levels of panic and claustrophobia and people shoving and trampling and he's not gonna leave without his parents!! of course not!! he triggers from the fear and the disorientation and the panic & he can't find them & he's trying to fight the crowd but he barely comes up past their knees & there's awful sounds of fighting & he's close enough to see her... things are doubly disorienting with the echo of the agony from everyone who gets Fucking Siberianed. he sees most of the fight. um. a while after she's driven away and it's finally finished he finds what's left of his parents. there's a beat in worm, during an encounter with siberian and the Big Heroes, the prime force equivalent, where they just.. give her a victim to chew on because it makes her happier and less of a nightmare to fight. which is something i think about frequently. anyway, after this things are kind of loose, similar to canon. he does the same shit. it's also quieter and you can feel less people hurting the higher up u are. yk? OH GOD. YEAH. at some point after this we still have not hammered it out. he confronts the slaughterhouse 9 (the supervillain group that attacked/siberian is part of) about it & gets his face slit open (half chelsea smile style) & makes a deal to either kill a guy in [n years] or that guy will kill him & several hundred other people!!!!!!!!!!!! dakota damascus killing a man baked into the bones of nhw!!!

anyway he & cat still fell. he underwent a second trigger event when this happened, actually-- the panic and desperation of that situation + the way it echoed his first trigger, etc. this is also super fucking rare, btw. there are very few second triggers & it is almost Never good. (u cannot trigger more than twice + a second trigger is always a refining or an improving of the intent of the original trigger) so that's where the speed etc. came from. tide found him, gave him. a better support system (low bar!!) + a real purpose in joining the wards. i have a lot of feelings abt this.

ashe / auxiliary / muse is also a shaker/breaker!!!!! his backstory i cannot talk too much about because it is Big Spoilers. but he is a fucking powerful telekinetic (around when he joins the wards, having not really used his power in years, he has an upper weight limit of a couple times his body weight & a fairly large radius of effect). he also has a breaker form that only triggers in certain situations & if he really really pushes himself to breaking w/ his powers-- when he enters it, he loses lucidity, for the most part, & starts warping and stretching and breaking space-time in strange, dreamlike ways-- the pavement melts, or everything gets bouncy, or cars and concrete chunks and things with no business moving float slowly around like balloons, or he pulls and crumples reality to move without really moving.... it gets Real fucking bad, real fast. ANYWAY. he eventually sneaks out one night, walks to a gas station to get. snacks. it-- okay, i'm fucking linking mac's post, i CANNOT summarize all of this concisely. go read that. so. that's ashe's deal!!!!!!!!!

THERE'S ALSO. MARK. ASK MAC ABOUT MARK i have typed this entire thing out on myfucking phone keyboard i literally Cannot keep going. help. and also their mark stuff is so fucking good its so. auuuhhgh. AND ALSO DAVID BELL. WHO WORKS FOR THE ORGANIZATION THAT SELLS U SUPERPOWERS IN A CAN W A CHANCE OF GETTING TURNED INTO AN UNRECOGNIZABLE MONSTER AND DOES HUMAN ABDUCTION AND EXPERIMENTATION. AND JADE AND X AND ALLEN ARE THE FREEDOM CITY WARDS AND GRAYSCALE SHAKES OUT EVEN FUCKING WORSE THAN IT DID IN CANON. YEAH.

SO. YEAHG. THATS. THATS THE MOST OF IT. um. yeah. theyre a dreadful little polycule they are. So fucking clingy they r traumabonded. like little trembling chihuahua puppies. separation anxiety and all. virion and dakota share a comfy old victorian house in a suburban neighborhood maybe a fifteen minute walk from the protectorate hq. wibby starts out living w/ david and eventually just... all his stuff moves over to their place. their clothes r all mixed up they know each others blood types they're all sleeping together on the couch. eventually their house gets blown up. they all get various flavors of nightmare & are 1 million shades of debilitatingly mentally ill but like-- it works. they r good for each other. theyre good together. do not separate them. etc. i'm not even gonna fucking START talking abt their dynamics other than that but like. i mean. if you want a repeat of THIS u can always ask!!!!!!!

[chateau7afra]

Folklore in Fargo

Spoilers ahead, Sailor.

One of the things I loved about Fargo this season so far, is the incorporation of Folklore, suberstition and God. We meet Ole Munch (Sam Spurrell) in the first episode. He seems to be a regular hitman of sorts at first, who is set to kidnap the main character Dorothy (Juno Temple) He comes across a bit excentric and the way he talks and dresses seem very anachronistic. We also quickly learn, that Dot is not the regular homemaker and loving mum, she seems to be. Munch and his handyman set out to kidnap Dot, but fail miserably, because Dot is setting up traps and generally fights back, like a tiger. Munch's handyman gets killed in the process. We also get to know Roy Tillman (John Hamm) who was the one who sent Munch on his mission. We're not sure yet why the right wing cowboy goes through so much trouble just to kidnap the young mother. Because Munch failed the task, Roy is refusing to pay him, which sets off a rather bleak storyline in which Roy and his son Gator (Joe Keery, my love) try to put an end to Munch and vice versa. The most intriguing thing about Ole Munch is the ritual he performs at the Tillman Farm. He kills a goat, covers himself in it's blood and leaves a message for Roy over his Daughter's beds. The whole shebang is very occult and seems heathen. And then there is also the flashback to Wales in 1522. See now, this is where it gets really weird. And where I had to start googling some stuff.

In the flashback scene, we see a character, dressed in what seems to be clothes of the lower class, entering a house full of upper class people who are in mourning, dressed in black and weaping. We have a funeral on our hands here. The poor person looks like Ole Munch. Is it him? Is it an ancestor of his? We dont know! On the belly of the deseaced man, which is laid out in the house, a plate with food is situated. When Munch enters the house, there is a tense energy in the room. Munch walks up to the dead body and consumes the food offered on the plate in an almos animalistic fashion. The people in the room gasp, some of them disgusted, some of them afraid. Or both. Before Munch leaves, he gets two silver coins. Which must have been a lot of money back in the day, I did not research that. But we clearly witnessed some sort of ritual happening. It turns out, sin eating was a practice rich people took part of in Wales, Ireland and England in the 1600s. A willing poor person was invited to literally eat the sins of the deseaced person, so they could be welcomed at the pearly gates, with a clean record. All the sins are transferred, to the person who ate the food. A grewsome fate for people at the time, but hey, a mans gotta eat. The world is bleak, so I don't go with the rational reason in fiction, ever. I like to think that Ole Munch ate so many sins, that he became a spirit, that can not die, who is forced to wander around the earth forever, and for some reason chose america. His very beautifully written monologues would suggest that. They almost sound shakespearian.

But how does this play into the bigger theme of Fargo S5? Well, if you think about it, the whole season is about unpaid depts and consequences. Dot ran away from Roy and the farm, because of the ongoing domestic violence Roy inflicts on her. In Roy's book, she owes him, because she made a pledge to him, when they got married. Even though it's very clear, that Dot wasn't so much older than his own son Gator, when the vows were exchanged. Ole Munch sees a debt not paid, because he didn't receive paymant for "eating the sin" of kidnapping Dot. Dot's mother in law, who is a very rich lady played by the brilliant Jennifer Jason Leigh points out "What is the point of being a billionaire, if you can't get someone killed.", while on the phone with an ex-president, apparently Bill Clinton, if I remember right. The show tries to say, we never got over the sin eating, because with money and power, you can pay your way out of any circumstance, be it kidnapping or murder. There is always going to be someone who needs the money more than their soul. And there is always going to be someone who takes advantage of that.

Roy Tillman, quotes the bible a lot. He thinks of himself as a right and just man, as a leader, even though he likes to bend the law to fit his own agenda. He does not give a flying fuck about the law of the land as it is "dictated by washington" and funds a right wing militia with taxpayer money, to actually kill democracy from within. He is the law of the land. These scenes sent shivers down my spine and reminded me vividly of January 8th.

Anyway. All of the storylines in this show are so amazing and worth writing about. Go watch it, you won't regret a second.

[zuureleena]

i drew the mercs, miss pauling, admin, and my tf2 oc on the plane to uni 😭

i did all of these a week ago and completely forgot to post them HAJAHAH miss p, the admin, and a rlly simplified ver of my tf2 oc miss lynn!! (zoey lynn hehe + js rambles abt her) under the cut

IM ACTUALLY REWORKING HER DESIGN RNNNN bcs i made her on the sims 4 LMAO and realised how much better and concise she looked, but i really wanna try and make her look like someone you'd js see irl? sooOOo tryna make her also recognisable from silhouette alone and blahablahblah tho she isn't the kind of character that would rlly make too much of a difference in the tf2 universe

i js wanted to make a loveable character LMAO who'd have more of an impact on the relationships and kinda the story?

i liked the idea of miss p having an extroverted bestfriend who's also her wingwoman bcs miss pauling is obvs an awkward lesbian mess who needs help in the love department, and vice versa bcs zoey is into scout and miss pauling is js so glad to have him move on n realise that they r better as friends!! and that he needs to be with someone who isn't annoyed by him 24/7 (IM SORRY, LWNAKS MY SELF-INSERTEDNESS GOT IN THE WAY HAHAHAHA I CANT HELP IT) also, i haven't rlly thought of any orientation for zoey... i'm thinking of her js being a het woman or js whatever u wanna interpret her as!! cuz her sexuality isn't a core thing abt her

she's an absolute harbinger of chaos who'd do anyt for money and some company (this girl has been hella lonely n stressed out of her mind and i'll explain why in an oc post🤭🤭) and even tho she never outright admits it, she does enjoy the freedom of violence she gets to have as a mann co assistant 😭 (which will ALSO make sense when i explain her background to u guys later on)

and bcs of her long experience w shady bosses and asshole customers she's had to deal within all the jobs she's had, she catches onto the administrator's whole thing with the australium fairly early into the job, but she's in tooooo deep now and is like "damn. do i get myself out of this fucked up job (that i am fucked up enough to actually enjoy) or do i stay bcs i literally have everything i've ever wanted....shit." like,, she did say she'd do anyt for money but at the cost of what 😭 [also MAN i wish we got that final comic so i can js make zoey's suspicions make sense??!?@ but in a way it js works bcs it's js this massive mystery that we don't even know of ourselves???? so likeee, im js assuming its smth rlly dangerous or smth bcs helen literally goes to the most insane lengths to get australium and finish off her final... thingy.. that uh DEBT is it... i forgot what she called it BUT WHATEVER BUSINESS SHE HAD TO ATTEND TO B4 SHE DIED QOABJASH]

OH AND YEAH, zoey hates how bossy the admin is and is an ass abt it at times, and the admin wants zoey gone so badly bcs shes an annoying little shit (which she is and honestly, her and scout can be annoying shits tgt <3) but miss p always convinces her to keep zoey BAGAHAHA and they do get things done much faster w zoey there sooOoOOo 🌝🤭

i mean she does try to kill both miss p & l anyway but still, she can't deny that they r both good at what they do

BWOSBQJS BYE I DONT THINK ANYONE IS GONNA READ THIS AHAGAH BUT THANK YOU IF U DID 😭 I HAVE SM ABT ZOEY AND I RLLY WANT HER TO BE LOVEABLE AUGHWGS

[thornswoggled]

my pilot chapter reaction in a nutshell

i really enjoyed this first glimpse into what TAMB might have been, but at the same time im grateful that we didnt get it. its a testament to how strong yamazakis commitment is to crafting a strong and compelling character-focused narrative that we went through seven (!) drafts to get where we're at. this first draft is tonally confused, unsure of its direction, and provides little room to wonder where the story might go from here. its almost perfectly suited to be a one-shot... which might be well and good when youre pitching ideas to a publisher, but feels strange compared to the long and winding narrative of character progression we currently have

so the initial backstory for chise being sold is a lot weaker. reads like a fanfic trope, feels like a "my mom sold me to one direction" story. i think its more important for chise to have put herself into a stupidly dangerous situation of her own accord - one day id like chise to fully appreciate the gravity of auctioning herself, seeing as she has only enough shame about it to avoid telling her peers. theres little room for speculation for this chise, who is sold to a loan shark to pay off debt. how does a japanese loan shark get in touch with a british mage, anyway?

this chise feels like... how should i put it? you know in middle school, those chapter books you would read about sassy girls going to like, vampire school and stuff? do you get what im going for here? shes sort of like that. she feels like the protagonist of a young adult novel series called something like "High School SUCKS 🩸🧛‍♂️... Volume One of the KNIFE to Meet You Chronicles 😈😈😈"

we also see that chise is enrolled almost immediately in the college. first, let me say that i love this proto-isaac we got here. i can only imagine yamazaki decided it was too troublesome to draw, or just felt out of place. which is a shame, because i like isaac quite a bit and i didnt pay him much mind when the college arc was first coming out because his design is such a nothing burger:

just as in the final story, chise is the odd one out at school - a witch attending classes for alchemists. but because she wasnt a sleigh beggy in this version (yamazaki says in interviews in the same book that chise went through a few different versions of what made her special, including being a 'specter in human form'), its unclear why shes here. this part is particularly striking to me, because...

... yes, i dont think you belong there either! because you already have a teacher, and he seems to be teaching you a lot already. more than elias is in the final story, anyway. this chise is competent and already fairly-self assured. is she here only for the social aspect? i do appreciate that elias doesnt trail her to school, but it doesnt mean much given that theres no explicit reason for her to be there

moving on to elias. first of all, yuck:

thanking god and also jesus that chise doesnt use such deferential terms for elias in the final version. blegh

this elias is uncanny valley. while chise has more attitude and sass in this version, elias makes up for it by being goofier and more amiable. theres still a sense of him being strange and off-putting, but it doesnt seem that this elias is the 'mild-mannered child pretending to be an adult' that yamazaki says our current elias is. i cant imagine chise has much to teach this elias on how to be human - if he struggles with emotions, its harder to tell. which makes sense, given that she also states that her initial draft of elias WAS originally human. i love the way yamazakis loose sketches for these panels end up making him much more expressive:

he has a sense of humor! can you IMAGINE him trying to make this joke land in the final story. chise would be like (jesse pinkman voice) "............. okay"

i cant help but wonder if, given several more decades of chises influence, maybe elias could somewhat embody this pilot personality

all that said, theres a significant difference in the dynamic between these two, and its that elias has never made any sort of indication that he intends for chise to be his wife:

i think this is a huge issue, and it provides little room for their relationship to grow in a way that feels compelling. in the final story, chise knows almost immediately what elias expects of her (or... what she THINKS he expects of her... she wont learn that his view of marriage is uninformed til later), and it colors how she regards him. which must be confusing for elias, considering he has little idea of the implication behind his words. elias is just as handsy in this draft as the final, but without the pre-established expectation of "youre gonna be my wife," coupled with elias not necessarily needing chise to teach him how to recognize his own emotions, this becomes a will-they-wont-they student-teacher romance that i frankly have zero interest in. not to yuck any yums but i just dont like that at all

despite it all, the heart of their dynamic still remains the same, and the goal of this series remains the same as the final:

even with badass punky chise and goofball elias as our protagonists, this is still a story about two people from opposite sides of the planet coming together and acknowledging their growing interest in one another. the desire to understand each other more is still at the core of these two. im just glad it was refined into what we got

and finally...

badass action girl knife-wielding chise you will always be famous. i love her so bad. thats all

[swiftfootedachilles]

hiiii achilles!!!!!!! how are you today? i miss your gallavich hot takes so do you have something in mind? have a good day 🌷

well apparently my big gallavich hot take is them having a jewish wedding 😭

okay. hmmm, actual unpopular hot takes? i gotchu

i want more intersex headcanons (that are well-researched and not fetishizing intersex people!). i want more t4t mlm gallavich. and i DEFINITELY want more t4t trans!mickey nonbinary!ian gallavich. because amab people are just as transgender as anyone else even if they dont take hormones or drastically change their appearance or change their name. nonbinary people arent women lite and men lite, theyre nonbinary. and i think nonbinary!ian is so slay

ian does not enjoy bottoming. even when he consented to doing it with trevor, he didnt actually like it. he simply tolerated it

when staying with the gallaghers, ian and mickey are very brazen about their sex life and dont try to stay quiet or even close their door sometimes, BUT they wont fuck in common areas like the kitchen and living room unless it was on the couch and they were 1000% sure there was NO chance of any of the kids walking in on them. they wouldnt traumatize liam or franny like that (stfu s5 doesnt count bc they knew liam was too young to have memories yet 😭 (speaking of, why does nobody ever talk about the fact that liam was 2 years old for like 3 whole years 😭😭))

their "security" business as it is in the finale isnt very sustainable. it literally started as money laundering, and ian didnt know. i think he eventually finds out by accident thru kev or vee what mickeys original "security business" plan was, and he gets super pissed. but i think they could very easily turn it into a legal business. we see them starting to do that, by working with real dispensaries instead of the shady illegal one kev and vee have in the bar. nevertheless, id like to read more future fics where they grow or adapt the business, and even move on to a new business altogether! theyre not exactly the career-having type. i think change over time actually helps stabilize them

THEY NEED TO PAINT THAT FUCKING AMBULANCE. ITS STOLEN. WHY DONT THEY EVER PAINT IT ALL BLACK OR SOMETHING?? WHERE DID THEY GET THE NEW PLATES. DID THEY EVEN CHANGE THE PLATES?? the s4 writers would never let a scam have so many plot holes 😔 they wouldve SHOWED us mickey and his brothers getting new plates for the truck

ian gets a tattoo for mickey. youre telling me that after the surprise anniversary party, you think ian WOULDNT get mickey somehow immortalized on his body? WRONG. he definitely does. i dont think its his name over his heart. maybe something small on his wrist? or M on his ring finger💜 thats a fav headcanon of mine

they dont start a family until close to 40. the longer theyre married, the more they realize they have to catch up on. learning to live together long-term, paying off debts and bills, moving, vacations, reconnecting with old friends and family, being there for liam where theu couldnt for their other siblings when they were liam's age, watching their nieces and nephews often to gain more caretaking and parenting skills, medical issues, family emergencies. theres just a lot that takes up their time, and they become very comfortable being two before they ever try to become three

they nonseriously say shit like "i want a divorce" but they NEVER mean it. even when one says it as a joke or like in s11e3, the other will ask "did you really mean that? do you really want a divorce? do you think we'll ever get one?" and they end up having a rare super serious heart-to-heart about it. about what they think the future might hold - or at least, what they want it to hold. the longer they are with each other the more stable their relationship becomes. bickering is less common, big fights are less explosive and violent, and they learn to become comfortable with silence

[melkyt]

The most entertaining role swap has to be Gortash snd Astarion.

Gortash being taken by Cazador and Astarion being taken by Raphael. Now would they go the same would Astarion be the one who escapes or would he serve Raph 200 years later? There is less keeping someone with a devil then with a vampire but it comes down to who they are.

We know that Astarion tried to rebel only to be locked in a crypt so he would escape early on, and Raph would not chase him, as the devil did not chase Gortash. So he would be going about his life in Baldur's Gate, using his standing as magistrate and gathering power. I am not sure he would turn to Bane, but eh would turn to a god that would give him power without explicitly pledging his loyalty, though if he did escape the hells through the help of a god, then he would farther their goals just as he would take it as a debt owed i think.

Gortash, on the other hand, would be trapped by magic of being a spawn but just as determined to get away. I do not think he would give up either, biding his time and trying to find any work around to the power Cazador holds over him. He would try to turn to the dead three but Mephistopheles is a much bigger player then Raphael, and no god wants to deal with that based on shit Mephisto often pulls, so they are not about to take the soul from the archdevil. So Gortash is stuck much like Astarion was.

Now comes Durge, Astarion is not much of a planner, he is much more impulsive then Gortash who built his empire, I feel likee Astarion acts and asks questions later.

Durge is a strategist, moving one step at a time, forward towards a goal. We see that unlike Orin he does not act on impulsive kills, carefully taking out those who threaten either gortash' plans or their own. This would be the same with Astarion if he does support one of the dead three. But i think it would be slower, I dont think Astarion would immediately approach Durge until he becomes a target in the way, and the bhaalist goes after him.

I dont know why, but I feel that Astarion would not see or care about the assassin until its too late and end up with a dagger at his throat. He would make several bad decisions, not looking into the future and that lends him in hot water with the cult and thats why Durge corners him but I think Bhaal or the butler would have him hold his hand, it would be easier to have the network inbplace with a familiar face (if Astariong is not a follower of the dead three.)

If he is a follower, even on the surface level, it is enough, and Bane directs his eye to the elf and bids him to make a deal with threats or promises, whatever works best for getting him to do what they want. Durge is becoming the leader and mastermind of this little endeavor, the grand design, but it is less mutuals with a shared vision and more their gods demanding obedience in their vision. Druge does not mind, but Astarion resists the chains. In the early days, it is a tense relationship that becomes a situationship, gremlins with benefits xd

Then Durge still gets tadpoled, meets Gortash in the aftermath, and a vampire spawn with a cunning eye. Just as defensive and on edge in the first days post nautoloid but with a clear goal of taking down Cazador but not opening up about his situation to durge for a while. He is the kind of man who believes he has to do everything himself, and he will be damned if he is to trust a total stranger to do this for him.

Durge figures there is a revenge plot and a kill in the future, so they bug Gortash about it endlessly xd.

All in all, fun little roleswap au. I would end it an a polyship between gortash/durge/astarion hehehhehehe

[sadcharactersrmykryptonite]

Sandray and why they are the The good thing at the wrong time, or the right person at the wrong time.

So i have read a lot of amazing meta on this series, especially the ephemarilty squad and it has made the viewer experience so much better. A big thank you to those people.

This post is technically not a meta nor am I claiming this is something groundbreaking. I just wanted to get my thoughts out.

Only friends has been an experience and my favourite couple is sandray. I know it will only give me pain but i am a masochist.

After episode five, I have seen a lot of people start to put blame on either sand or ray or Boston ( who is at 80% fault). But in this series we can't just easily put them in a blame box. It's way to complicated for that, as emotions are.

Ep 5 is from the perspective of sand while ep 4 was from ray, from these two eps we realise how different they are, how different their experiences are.

Ray is not exactly a mature person or even a put together person like sand. And we know why, he has self esteem issues, depression and is an alcoholic due to childhood circumstances. And he does not have a supportive network. And we can't blame the friends group because they are twenty something college kids who have no idea of the seriousness. Case in point, how they wave off rays talks of being a burden and continues to enable his bad habits. He is an incredibly messy character, with clear trauma and we have given enough points, explicitly told through the narrative. We are supposed to feel sympathy for him, we are supposed to feel empathy for him. We should root for him to become better.

Compare that with Boston. Boston has been given implied issues, acted out brilliantly by neo. Now whether they are some deep rooted issues from his childhood or parents or others, we dont know. Cause we are not explicitly told. We are supposed to be see him as the antagonist.

In the case of ray, we have given reason to believe that mew is not a great friend to ray as he claims to be. So we are not supposed to root for them so then who should we root for.

Enter sand, who's practically perfect, put together, mature and hot. But the problem is sand is not a put together person, at all.

Sand juggles between jobs, he takes care of the debt of his mother and is a good son. But he's in need of money and he has told that he will do anything to get more money. Aka his illegal plum business.

Ep 5 gives us mote depth of his character. And from the outside he looks cool, calm and collected, inwardly sand is an emotional person, who's driven by his emotions. Now from the first eps we were led to believe that ray is the emotional drunkard looking for trouble. He's not. Ray is driven by his trauma, his addiction, his thoughts, not his emotions.

Sand on the other hand is quick to anger, sarcastic to the point that someone has probably tried to punch him and has a rigid moral sense. And he wants to take care of stuff. And he falls fast. But he doesn't know how to deal with them.

Sand has gotten hurt before by way of top. And he keeps his emotional walls up. Ray is lonely, he wants to connect. And a lot of people have said that he doesn't know to connect but he does. Everything he does with sand is that, he's forging a connection.

Ray was the one who initiated every one of their interactions, even if it was done in an annoying manner. And sand doesn't give a rigid boundary he immediately gives into ray.

And this connection has already been formed, entirely initiated by ray and its strong. To the point that sand has fallen hard and has already given a designated time for ray.

But they are not in the same page. Sand has told ray that he wants to just be FWB and ray has agreed to that. And while we have seen clear signs from both of then that they like each other, I don't thing they are getting it. There understanding level is clearly marred with their issues, sand with being a second choice and ray with everything.

But they have shown that they can communicate. So why are they not communicating now. Because sand has put up the boundary of FWB. No amount of mooning and looking sad is going to tell ray that he wants to be boyfriends. He has to be explicitly told and sand has to do that.

Ray should also be clear with want he wants. Verbally. But both of them are not in a place of mind to do that. And that is surprising, because we could have expected that from the put together one. Expect sand is dealing with his issues and is unwilling to try , because of the threat of heartbreak and is letting his emotions get the better of him.

On the contrary, in rp 5 , ray seems more calm. He is actually trying, he's connecting with sand with doing the things that he loves. He's falling for sand and I think he does know.

Even after being drunk and high he has the werewithal to open up a conversation, he gave the chance to sand to try. But sand rejected it. That was a big chance and if sand had taken that chance, they could have talked about their current situation. That's what's so heartbreaking about it, because the possibility was there. I mean look at him here.

He clearly wanted him to talk to him.

Expect sand didn't take it, his problems prevented him from doing it, his emotions which were going overbroad prevented him from thinking rationally.

And ray took that rejection, personally. We can easily infer what went through his mind from what we already know ," I am a burden, I am a jinx". "I have tried my best but it's not working, So why should I try more", aka the devastating happy birthday.

Ray was rational at that moment, and dare I say mature, especially considering the scene that happened just before that. Ray was able to think above his emotions and give a rational way out of that predicament. But sand rejection triggered his trauma and he went back to square one.

There was a beautiful post about different types of understanding in this series. That's what is happening here, different types of understanding. But I can't find that post.

At that point both needed to understand the other but there individual issues left them unable to do it. And it's not anyone's fault. It's not a blame game. It's the reality of trauma situations.

How trauma and mental health issues can create problems, can make situations seem bigger then they actually are. How it made two people who are compatible with each other be reluctant to go further.

They can be the perfect couple the audience want them to be. But at this point of time , they are the right person at the wrong time archetype.

And they will remain if they don't communicate. Let's hope by the end of the messiness they both have some clarity on how to go further. And give the audience an emotionally charged story.