#like halfway through the video i was like BRO HOW MANY SHOUT OUTS? and he kept going

[doctorcurdlejr]

supercut of timothee's shoutouts in the Nardwaur interview

[steve0discusses]

S5 Ep 14: So If You Put a Fraction Into a Duel Disk, the Card Explodes

We left on quite the cliffhanger last episode, so I’ll fill you in:

I did not get the haircut.

Like I seriously considered getting a Zigfried for a cool 3 or 4 minutes there, but then I decided to wait a couple of days and I basically forgot.

But, back to the arc finale, Seto has decided to walk, not run, to the Kaiba lab in order to fix the virus rapidly eating his entire company.

I just want to point out that Zigfried went through a LOT of work to get Seto Kiaba to go “uggggh” turn around, and pretend to calmly walk away. I’m used to Seto losing his nut kind of a lot and blowing things up but this season he’s like “be chill be chill be chill” so that the entire world doesn’t think he’s a spaz on TV.

And little aside about Seto’s design choices here, I fell down a hole of interior design videos, and can I just say: apparently these wood frame things on the wall are back in style? Good on you, 2002(3?) Seto Kaiba. Don’t think that current designers are painting them purple but...we’re halfway there to Yugioh fashion.

Meanwhile, Pharaoh decides to remind everyone that these stakes are hella low. The worst that happens is that Zigfried deletes the plane that Yugi needs to fly home...which would be an impressive virus.

Like it’s hard to tell if Yami even has a solid concept of “capitalism” and whether or not he cares about or understands the makeup of Seto’s company (which up till now has operated like a small country and not a business...which is a little more Pharaoh’s understanding. Either way...hard to tell if Yami would shed two tears for the loss of Kaiba corp.)

And, despite what I say in the caps, I feel like Leon and Zigfried are the first villains we’ve ever had that Yugi and Pharaoh didn’t unintentionally disclose that they are 2 people to. Zigfried and Leon are just...completely oblivious to how effed up Yugi’s bean is. They think that’s just a normal kid and lol no dudes...y’all got distracted by Seto Kabia but you have a literal Egyptian God just hovering around in the background and dating 3 people by accident.

Like when the show shelves the main storyline, it is very funny how it’s all “And we’re gonna put the Pharaoh crisis on hold--just put a pin in it. No one will notice this child is two nervous wrecks stitched together” and then Yugi and Yami just kinda hold it in and watch all patiently until it’s their turn to get off the bench.

(read more under the cut)

In the giant computer tower, Seto Kaiba shouts out a string of orders and numbers, admired the many sonar detector looking windows open on every monitor, and then sat down at his desk to like...check the firewall, I guess?

The virus is past the firewall. It’s um...it’s inside the firewall, pretty sure that was the point, but youknow, it’s a kid’s show so they’re just throwing out computer stuff that has no meaning to the writers of this show.

Mokuba thinks fondly of how Seto Kaiba has never screwed him over (which I mean...maybe not on purpose, ((except for that one time he did screw him over on purpose to get Gozaburo Kaiba to accidentally give Seto Kaiba the company, but you could say that was a grander scheme that he knew Mokuba would see through, which...)) but Seto certainly has screwed Mokuba over accidentally. At least once.)

And meanwhile, Yami fixes everything through card shenanigans.

So here’s the shenanigan this episode: I don’t go over cards here but this one requires a limited amount of explanation.

So every round the golden castle deletes half of Yugi’s cards. So he was like...I’ll just draw down to one card. They can’t delete half a card...so that means the card must delete one of the two cards on the field which means it must delete itself.

...which is like the closest Yugioh will probably ever get to abusing a glitch to do a speedrunning tactic like GDQ.

Anyway, like I stated in the title: there are no fractions allowed in Yugioh. If you do that to your priceless one-of-a-kind card you got from winning one of Pegasus’ murder tournies, it will irreparably bust the card.

I’m sure at least one of you will correct me with the proper way to insert a fraction into your duel disk. Cuz like...as I say multiple times so we never forget, I barely pay attention to this card game and I’m just flying by the seat of my pants.

I want to say Seto and Mokuba were in the hacker chairs for like...3 minutes maybe before they realized “oh...Yugi fixed it...” and walked the half a mile back to the duel arena.

and also, as I’m looking at Seto’s glasses here, I just realized...all of Kaiba’s team wears sunglasses all the time. Inside, outside, night, or day...

They haven’t outright said this...but what if those aren’t sunglasses?

Is Roland and that other Roland wearing fancy cyber glasses? They are, right? Because they wear them indoors?

Damn, they can’t take a piss without being on call with Kaiba Corp, can they?

Now the problem is...Yugi played all of his cards (he has two in front of him face down, but none in his deck) and after milling himself, this means he’s now basically a sitting duck for Leon to take the title of “King of Games.”

Leon insists that he defend whatever scraps are left of his card honor and not duel a person who is carrying no cards and Yugi was like “COME AT ME BRO THIS IS THE ONLY WAY I KNOW I’M ALIVE.”

He didn’t even have to do a horror on Leon, he just...played cards good? I skipped it, I’ll be honest, but overall Leon’s card honor was...saved? Maybe? I mean he also go destroyed when his competitor had not a single card in his duel disk so...

...Leon will have to work on his card honor off screen because he’s pretty well humiliated at this point.

But stumbling onto the playing field like he’s half dazed/daydrunk, Zigfried is like “You forgot I already won, bastards!”

Which is when we find out that Zigfried’s “delete all” virus failed to press “enter” and deleted basically nothing. Just like when my Mom attempts to send something in Gmail but doesn’t press “Send” and tells me that Google is down and broken.

Sorry my bro has informed me that he ALSO has had to help my Mother locate the “Send” button and I just...I know she absolutely did that but I’m in denial that this Riddle of the Sphinx has happened to her multiple times.

Honestly, the pep talk we get from Leon at the end to cheer up his bro was a whole lot of “we will pick ourselves up and we’ll do better next time. Together.” and sure you can translate that as “we’ll be honest next time” or you can translate that as “next time we will be not nearly as obvious about inserting a virus into their computer until it is done doing the job, bro.”

Just like Dartz, we didn’t really get a whole lot of retribution or closure when it comes to Zigfried. But, unlike Dartz, Zigfried didn’t do too much murder, so I guess this is fine. He tried to cheat in a card game...

...and I guess tried to delete Kaiba Corp but youknow...

...people let him have that. The police saw the ticket of “this man tried to delete Kaiba Corp” and they just...didn’t arrest him. The judge saw that ticket and didn’t put out a warrant. They just let Zigfried have this, almost like “better luck next time, ya?”

And then Roland clocked out for the day and went home, thus ending this arc.

Look at all these characters, most of which we never saw duel even one card.

We also got one shot of Mai for some reason although she was not in this arc.

AAAHHHH. Every time I’m like “the show is done screwing geography” we get another freakin geography spook!

But we went back to California in order to get a scene of these guys in an airport to get a flight to Japan...

which means Rex and Weevil just...were they shipped home by the Kaibas? Because way to ditch getting arrested by the American Government, hot damn. They are...literally terrorists who destroyed a Caltrain in a plot to kill everyone in the world so like...really surprised Rex and Weevil are in public...but maybe all the FBI were dead at the time so they just didn’t know?

Meanwhile, Duke has to go back to Death Valley and call a tow truck for his car, RIP.

I sure hope he got PTO during this stunt and isn’t going home to a pink slip.

I’m not sure of Dukes life or anything going on with Duke. I’m sure the thing about Serenity is him joking because we have all forgotten about that girl by this point...but also...is Duke...still living in the Tenderloin? The crime rate is very, very high and the ground isn’t solid, so it will liquefy if there’s an Earthquake, but it is one of the few places in the Bay Area that doesn’t light on fire every year. He has that going for him.

I just really hope Duke moves out of the Tenderloin one of these days, he needs a better life.

Meanwhile, Rebecca does one last crime.

This is like a post-epidemic reaction to a hug, but in 2002(3?).

I don’t think I’ll miss Rebecca too much. Wanted to like her more, but she was under-utilized, like most of the characters on Yugioh. Not even just talking girl characters here--most characters on Yugioh are super under-utilized, just Tristan Wallflowers doing nothing, but also being selectively OP as hell about very specific things they never, ever need to do.

Speaking of the devil:

Yugi...just saved his entire company...

But Mokuba is just has to make sure to make it seem like they owed Mokuba and not the other way around. Just in case.

So off they go on this massive plane. It’s probably more to do with the length of the trip as to why the plane is so big but also...

This plane is overcompensating.

But before we analyze that, lets close the book on Seto Kaiba’s very short therapy arc. Overall, it was a nice distraction, but I can see why people call it a filler arc, as it really doesn’t affect...anything going on in the major plotlines, which makes me think it could have been a movie or a game or something. But overall, it’s not bad, it’s just not what you’d expect if you were a Western audience.

Like I’m preaching to the choir, but typically, Western stories are entirely plot focused, and so our arcs always give or take away from that plot. But in a Eastern story arc, it may instead be character focused, where the climax is a character evolving or coming to some sort of cathartic realization, which this arc was, in a big way. We still had some plot, because this is a Shonen, but overall it was about characters, and specifically whether or not Leon and his bro would reconcile or change--which they did.

We did get to see a little more growth on Seto in that he...didn’t go bonkers and hallucinate during a card game. It’s been a while since we’ve had him not do that. Seto was very chill this arc, which makes sense, it was a very chill slice of life arc for everyone involved.

So, next we move on to the next one, which bro has informed me...is

still not Bakura.

According to Bro, the next arc didn’t even air in the Japanese version of the show? Like he’s got a lot of spicy Yugioh headcanons so he could be wrong (He did tell me that he thought that Zigfried was Seto Kaiba’s ex boyfriend when he saw this as a kid which...that sure is a way to interpret this arc, and it probably wasn’t just my little brother who went down that thought tube there...)

(Bro Note: To be fair, I didn’t watch much of this arc as a kid.)

But he says the next arc was originally a movie. But they released it in the States as episodes to be part of S5, just to put more episodes in there. Which, if he’s correct, makes it seem like we’re getting like the Mulan 2 experience kind of shoved in between this arc and the next

But um..

according to bro it has virtually no card games.

.......

I’m so used to only capping 10 minutes an episode, what?

Anyway, until then, here’s the link to read the rest of these from the start in chrono order:

https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yugioh/chrono

I’m kinda itching to do a Season Zero, it’s been a hot minute--so those take a little longer to do, especially since I need to go to a different site I haven’t...checked out yet...I’ll be back...eventually? I just know that at some point in Season Zero they fight it out with yo-yo’s and I want to see it.

[imaginingsoftly]

Baseball Trivia Pt. 2 - Josh Anderson

Type: Y/N insert shorts, strangers to enemies-ish to lovers, series

Requested: No

Warnings: standard swearing

There was no fucking way. Y/N stared at Thatcher as he talked, but the words he was saying weren’t computing. No fucking way was Josh Anderson on his way to Vancouver. It was like fate had heard her think that they would never meet again and laughed as she sent Josh in Y/N’s direction. “Earth to Y/N, where the fuck did you just go?” She snapped back to the present, shaking her head and smiling at the mountain of a man in front of her instead of responding. Thatcher gave her another weird look before continuing. “We’re gonna have the end-of-summer barbeque at my place after the last day of training camp, and I expect you to be there. Someone’s gotta help me man the grill.” 

It was tradition. End-of-summer barbeques had become a thing beginning their sophomore year at BC, after the pair had become close during their freshman year. Almost eight years later it was still a yearly tradition, though now the barbeque was extended to the entirety of the training-camp team rather than just a few friends. “Took you long enough to pick a date,” Y/N retorted, slapping the bill of Thatcher’s baseball hat. “ I thought I was gonna have to have a barbeque all by myself.” Thatcher slapped the bill of her hat in response, and it turned into an all-out war. As an only child, Thatcher had become the closest thing she had to a brother, shenanigans included. It was refreshing to have someone to mess with who wouldn’t get upset when she roughhoused a little. 

Even while trying not to let Thatcher and his professional athlete muscles overpower her much smaller frame Y/N found her mind wandering back to Josh. There was really no reason for her to be freaking out as much as she was. It was one hook up. There were no strings implied, no numbers exchanged, it’s not like she ghosted the guy, not really. Thatcher had never really expressed any distaste towards her dating other NHLers, but it was different when it came to his teammates. They were like his brothers, and were therefore her brothers by extension. In other words, off limits. 

She really just needed to relax. He wasn’t even on the team when they got together. Everything would be fine. Josh was part of the family now, and she would follow his lead. If he wanted people to know they hooked up then fine, but if he wanted to act like a stranger that was even better. Thatcher was a little bit too protective of Y/N at times, and she religiously avoided getting into it with his teammates just to make sure she didn’t mess with team chemistry. Honestly, there was a chance Josh wouldn’t even remember her. It’s not like the guy had a glowing reputation anyway, and they had been drinking. It would be fine. Maybe if Y/N repeated it to herself often enough, she would start to believe it. 

Y/N sighed heavily, giving in as Thatcher managed to wrestle her into a headlock. “Seriously, Y/N, are you okay?” Thatcher released his arm and turned her so they were facing each other. Crap. Here comes the interrogation. “You’ve been on another planet since we started talking. What gives?” She shrugged. There was no way she was going there right now. 

“I guess I’m just tired, bro,” she said with a shrug, “conference play just started. I’ve got a lot on my plate.” Thatcher reached up to squeeze her shoulders, and Y/N struggled not to cringe at how easily he ate up her lie. It sucked to lie to him, but there was no way she was going to tell him about Josh, not without talking to Josh first. Her response seemed to placate Thatcher, and he gave up on that line of questioning after making Y/N promise to take care of herself. 

Keeping things from Thatcher was tough; he was there for her after her boyfriend of three years broke up with her halfway through their junior year of college, he drove her down to UConn the summer after graduation so she could begin her first internship as a college grad, and he’d been the one to welcome her to Vancouver with open arms after the completion of said internship. He was there for every important part of her adult life, and now the one thing she hadn’t told him was going to bite her in the ass. The universe was out to get her. 

Training camp would begin tomorrow, and in a couple of weeks Y/N would have to face Josh in the same backyard she was sitting in at the moment. There went any sleep she had planned to get before basketball was added to her workload. 

---Josh POV--------------------------------------------------

“So there’s no one in your life? No girl at all? Not even a hookup?” The questions were getting annoying, to say the least. It wasn’t the guys’ fault; they just wanted to get to know him. The problem was that he shouldn’t be doing this. He was supposed to stay in Columbus, live his life there until he retired and then move back to Canada. 

Josh shook his head. “No hookup. Although there was this one girl,” he said with a small smile, “she was something else. We talked for hours at the bar, and she knew so much about baseball and hockey history. We hooked up, and then she was gone when I woke up the next morning. No note, no number, nothing. And she was from out of town, so I couldn’t even try running into her at the same bar again.” All of the guys groaned sympathetically, and they finally let that line of questioning go. Truthfully, he hadn’t thought about that girl in months. She had been fun to talk to, and tough enough to dish back everything Boone and Seth had thrown at her, but it wasn’t like he wanted to fucking marry the girl or anything. Mostly, it was the fact that she had left that stuck with him. He was always the one leaving. The girls usually tried to hang around, maybe try to get more than one night. It was an asshole thing to think, he knew that, but damn it sucked to be on the other end of it. He didn’t even know where she lived. In all of their time talking he only learned she worked at a university. He didn’t even know if it was in the States or Canada. 

A tape ball connected with the side of his head, and Josh shot a glare at Bo from across the locker room. A middle finger almost followed, until he noticed video cameras catching the exchange. Josh waved at the intern behind the camera sheepishly. They would have had to cut that for their welcome back video if he hadn’t caught himself. Another tape ball came flying at his head, courtesy of Stecher, and Josh whipped that one back at his teammate with a grin. The guys were alright, even if some of them could be pretty childish. Even Hughes acted older than some of the guys, and he was the team baby. A body slumped down into the stall next to Josh’s, and he looked over to find Thatcher watching him. “‘Sup, Dems?” 

Thatcher smiled up at Josh, a shock considering the choice words he’d thrown in Josh’s direction after a particularly nasty dangle he’d put past the goalie at the end of practice. “Barbeque at my place this afternoon.” Shit. He’d planned on exploring the city, maybe finding a hookup tonight. “Non-negotiable, everyone comes,” Thatcher interrupted, almost like he knew Josh was about to refuse. “It’s a tradition. One of my college friends and I get together and man the grill. We’ve been doing it for almost eight years now. Bring yourself and your booze of choice if it isn’t beer or wine.” Josh nodded. Your goalie says you come to some end-of-summer party, you go to the party. Don’t mess with a goalie’s traditions or superstitions. Thatcher stood, punching Josh’s shoulder. “Everybody starts showing up around 4. See you then.” 

Thatcher made his way around the locker room repeating the same announcement, and it was met with shouts of excitement and reminiscing on barbecues of year’s past. Clearly it was a hit. Brock and Petey somehow roped Josh into riding to the party with them, promising that Josh would be happy he’d taken an Uber with them instead of driving himself. “The drinking is legendary,” Brock had promised, a solemn nod of agreement coming from both Petey and Stecher, who flanked Brock. Legendary parties were his thing. This would be even ground, and he could keep up. Bring on the drinking.

--Y/N POV----------------------------------------------------

Y/N woke up the day of the barbeque feeling sick as the Dropkick Murphys blasted on her alarm. It didn’t matter how many times she told herself it would be fine, running into the guy she had ghosted was going to suck. Hopefully he was as interested in revealing their hookup as she was, and it would never get mentioned again. 

She groaned as her alarm continued to scream the lyrics to Rose Tattoo, reaching up to swipe the alarm off her phone. Thatcher was expecting her at his place before he left for camp in an hour with a list of groceries for him to pick up on the way home. The desserts Y/N had prepared the night before were sitting on the counter when she stumbled into the kitchen for coffee, mocking her with their chocolatey stare. It was going to be one of those days. She caved, shoving one of the cupcakes into her mouth with a groan. If she didn’t get a handle on herself before she made it to Thatcher’s he was going to get suspicious. The last time she acted this strangely some poor kid from the Comets almost got punched for flirting with her. The guys had good intentions, but sometimes they took the caveman shit too far. 

With her coffee brewed and cupcake eaten, Y/N shuffled into the bathroom to get ready for the day. She washed her face and brushed her teeth on autopilot, debating if mascara were really necessary. The guys had seen her at her worst, and she didn’t really care what they thought about the sprinkling of acne on her jawline that just wouldn’t go away. It’s not like she was interested in any of those idiots. Well, any of the idiots that had been with the team before a couple of weeks ago, anyway.

A hat would be necessary, even if she was just going to be in Thatcher’s house until it was time to grill. Her nose would burn something awful if she didn’t wear something with a bit of protection, and the soccer games she was working that week would just add to the burn. Hat protection for sure. She slapped on an old BC Hockey hat, one she’d stolen from Thatcher, and looked into her closet with a sigh. The decision on what to wear took far too long. The guys loved to throw her in the pool, especially Brock when he got drunk, so her bathing suit needed to be reliable. The problem was that they also loved to take photos for their social media pages, and her most reliable swimsuits were also the least flattering. The black and white striped bikini was the most durable, but Y/N really wanted to wear the strappy midnight blue one-piece she’d gotten on a whim during a day trip to Seattle. Durability won out in the end, and the bikini was stuffed into her bag beside the pajamas that would inevitably find use when she didn’t want to go all the way home at the end of the night. 

Y/N’s drive to Thatcher’s was relaxing. She lived in the middle of the city, fond of the ability to walk down the street to the grocery store or the bars, but Thatcher’s place was right outside the city, on a quiet sidestreet that better resembled a neighborhood in her hometown. She stopped at their favorite coffee shop on her way out of the city, picking up another coffee for her and a breakfast sandwich for Thatcher. It didn’t matter how many times the nutritionist told him to knock it off, Y/N knew he relied on those sandwiches to get him through morning skates. In no way was Thatcher a happy camper in the morning. His attitude rivaled even hers. Thatcher was waiting outside when she arrived, sitting on his front stoop like she had missed curfew or something. 

“You’re late,” Thatcher called as she opened her door, “and you’re gonna make me late for camp if you don’t hurry it the fuck up.” Y/N raised her middle finger in response, leaning back into the car for the desserts. Thatcher appeared behind her to help carry things, and Y/N had to slap his hand away from the trays when he tried to reach for a cookie. If he ate one now, he’d eat them all by the time the actual party started. She’d learned that lesson the hard way. Y/N placed the breakfast sandwich on top of the tray of cookies Thatcher was carrying, and he leaned down quickly to kiss her cheek. “You’re the bomb, bro, my saviour.” Y/N rolled her eyes. He was so dramatic about his breakfast sandwiches. 

Y/N finally managed to get Thatcher out the door and off to camp with a promise to get the backyard ready for that night, so long as he grabbed the necessary groceries on the way home. It was their agreement since they’d both settled in Vancouver; she brought dessert and got the house ready for guests, Thatcher bought all the food and alcohol. Everything was ready for the night, really, with the exception of the grill. It looked like it hadn’t been cleaned since she cleaned it last summer, so Y/N grabbed all of her cleaning supplies with a sigh. She needed a clean grill if they were going to make burgers tonight. That was non-negotiable. 

---Josh POV--------------------------------------------------

Brock and Stecher were far too loud when they were tipsy. Petey was fine, if anything even more quiet than normal, but the other two were borderline obnoxious. The pregame had begun the moment everyone rolled up to Brock’s place, and Josh had to admit he hadn’t expected it. Pregaming a team party was a little weird, but hey, he was with a bunch of fellow hockey players. They didn’t always do things that made sense. Herding them into the Uber waiting on the street outside Petey’s apartment was no easy feat, and Josh felt himself sweating a little bit as the responsible one of the party. This never happened. He was always the one being herded.

The ride was long, as apparently Thatcher lived outside the city, and Brock kept Josh entertained with stories of barbecues past. “I think the worst, though, was that time Jake almost drowned.” Stecher started laughing, and Josh stared at him uncomfortably. A teammate almost drowning was funny? Brock must have caught his expression, because he hurriedly continued. “He wasn’t actually drowning, he was just so drunk that he sat in the shallow end and yelled for help. It came up to like his chest.” Stecher roared with laughter again, and Josh joined in a little bit. That must’ve been a sight.

Thatcher’s house was far too nice for a bachelor, a moderately large home that was built for a small family and not a single hockey player who basically lived on the road. It was homey-looking, covered in gray wooden shingles and boasting a wrap-around porch Josh envied. It was perfect for sitting with a small group of friends. He could only imagine the inside, if the outside was any indication. The landscaping and yard decorations gave away that Thatcher hadn’t decorated the place himself. The inside probably looked like a design catalogue vomited on it.

Cars lined the long driveway and the street in front of it, all Range Rovers and fancy sports cars guys who didn’t know how to spend their money splurged for. Josh caught himself as the wave of negative thoughts continually rolled over him. These were his teammates, not the enemy. Those thoughts weren’t helpful. 

Josh was pulled out of his line of thinking by the stopping of the Uber, and he was the only one to thank the older guy driving as they all piled out of the car. Petey led the way into the house, though Stecher made his presence known with a shouted hello as he brought them through a hallway that indeed looked like a design catalogue and into a bright and airy kitchen. The cabinets were white, as were the countertops, though most of the walls were covered in some kind of dark teal tile. 

Thatcher was slumped on a countertop, flicking the bill of the baseball cap on the girl in front of him. He laughed when she raised a middle finger at him, flicking the hat again. The girl mumbled something under her breath that sounded suspiciously like a threat, in a voice that sounded vaguely familiar. She reached up and smacked Thatcher’s hand when he went to flick her hat again, and Thatcher laughed harder as he swept three beers off the counter and walked back outside through the accordion doors to his left. The girl shook her head after him, though the moment was broken when Brock stumbled into the room behind Josh. 

“Y/N!” Brock yelled enthusiastically. He threw his arms around the girl from behind, and the laugh she let out made Josh freeze. It couldn’t be. “Babe,” Brock continued, “you’ve gotta meet our new teammate. He’s your kind of player. Likes to hit things.” Brock began to turn the girl around by the arm still slung over her shoulders, and Josh almost shouted at him to stop. He knew that laugh, and the girl attached couldn’t be here. Their eyes met, and Josh saw the panic he felt reflected in her eyes.

He was so fucked. 

[chappedandfadedvds]

Jan 21st, Thursday 23:44

He felt his eyes bruning as he watched the game get closed by Lucas beside him. 

It was late and for the last hours they had been constantly talking. 

Right after dinner with Kes and Isa, to talk about the weekend and them arriving tomorrow. Lucas was already looking forward to have his friends over. They would visit Antwerp for the first time, unfortunately inmidst the pandemic, which therefore menat that they’d only get to see the trip from the station to Jens’s place. Maybe another time, it would be a little more exciting. 

Still, the sole fact that Lucas could hug his best friends tomorrow, was enough to forget about the rest.

And then at around nine the two both had bid their goodbye and switched towards the large group chat on discord, for some good ol’ Among Us.

Jens had been a bit wary as Lotte had joined them to talk to Isa, but fallen asleep halfway through the conversation. She had rested her head in his lap, as she had made herself comfortable. His blanket covered her whole and her breathing was even. He had brushed through her her for a while until he was with his friends.

Because it was loud and chaotic and constant talking and yelling over each other, especially as they were busy playing. Jens had been worried that it would wake his little sister. But she seemed to really be out of it. Hadn’t even moved, when Sander had screamed at Milan’s betrayal two games in.

Amber had voiced her adoration at the sight of the´m three huddled together on Jens’s bed. He silently had agreed to the serene bliss that showed on the little video on the screen in call.

With Lotte sleeping on one side, her head buried on his stretched out legs and Lucas to his left, pressed against Jens, it really looked domestic. The younger boy’s head fell onto his shoulder every time that Jens was taking control of the player. They were too many for the lobby anyway, so they had decided to switch back and forth between games at the start.

However, as the energy had subsideded and a pleseant weariness had made them all agree to stop for tonight, the group was still in call for a little while, just talking, checking their phones. Some already ready to go.

„Guys? Do you have like a minute left?“ Jens voiced, with Lucas turning around in curiousity. The same one that was instantly displayed by all of his friends given him their full attention. It was a bit fightening to suddenly be faced by complete silence. „I just wanted to tell you something real quick.“

Like whiplash, Jens was quickly swamped by everyone giving him words of encouragment to continue. It was hard to distinguish between the voices cracking over the speaker.

„Alright.“ 

„Of course.“

„Take your time.“

„What’s up, Bro? Spill.“ That last one, definitely had been Moyo.

„So. I know that I had been really distant, especially over the last couple of weeks. And thank you so much for sticking with me. I know I can be a dick. I didn’t mean to ghost you all. I just needed time to figure myself out.“ 

Sander looked as if he wanted to say something, but Jens just went on. He couldn’t stop here, or he would decide to defer this onto some later date. But he had promised Lucas to change, and this would be one of the steps to take. 

In all honesty his friends at least deserved that.

„This really means a lot to me. Especially since I havent really talked about everything that is going on. I promise you to do that, not today though. I hope you won’t be mad. But uhm, I actually meant it in the cabin, when I said that I will raise Lotte on my own.“ Jens paused for a second, his gaze dropping to the sleeping figure in his lap. He knew he had made the right desicion back in december. „So Today I got my court date to see the judge, who will hopefully grant me the complete guardianship over her. And I‘m really nervous.“ Jens ended and exhaled. He said nervous and it was the truth. On one hadn how his friends would react and if they would accept it. 

It certainly would complicate future plans. He couldn’t just spend a couple of weeks with them on trips, or go to spontaneous parties, or stay out after school, just because he felt like it. He knew it would change their dynamic. And he was afraid that he would loose his friends along the way.

„Wait, what? Why didn’t you tell me earlier?“ Lucas asked, simultaneously confused and surprised. It took Jens a solid minute to figure out the reason. Right, he hadn’t told the younger boy about it yet. 

„Because we were busy with other stuff.“ 

He realised to late, that this could be falsely construed. The whole voice chat was already in a struggle of wheezes and laughs as Jens quickly tried to take control back. „Calm the fuck down. With dinner. Jesus. Honestly. It was dinner preperation.“

„Yea. Only work and definitely no time for dick with this one.“ Lucas added unhelpful to the situation. It was a clear reference to the song they had listened to. The one that anybody else obviously haden’t and therefore could only worsen the glee in their eyes. There were high screeches and gasping lungs fighting for dominance on speaker.

Lotte briefly shifted, but nothing else.

Jens watched and waited. He could see Amber’s and Moyo’s wide eyes, while Milan, Jana and Robbe were clutching their stomachs. Sander only shook his head in feigned dissapointment as he grinned.

„Alright. Glad you all are having a great time.“ Jens pouted, despite the amused smile that gave him away.

„Sorry.“ Milan said, the laughs finally started to abate, only the occasional giggle slipped up.

„When’s the date?“ Yasmina chimed in. An angel, if anyone would have asked Jens. Everyone’s attention swiftly back on Jens, who pulled his phone out to check the mail once more. He definitely should write it down somewhere. 

„On the nineteenth of February. So a little under a month. Alex, our lawyer, tried to get one as soon as possible, because of the urgency with my mom. But yeah. That’s not that far from now, I guess.“

„Do you know, if it will be a hard to win?“ That was Zoe , Senne next to her, both rather calm inmidst the chaos his other firends displayed. He always felt a little like talking to parents, when they looked at him like this in unison.

„I don’t think so. We had all other potential adults sign a waiver and I’m eighteen. The only uncertainty could be financials, but that is unlikely. I have the house and inheritance and my father’s allowence. Still, it could go wrong.“

That’s what caused his nervosity in the first place, the sheer possibility that something could take Lotte away from him.

„No, it will be fine. I’m pretty sure. You have always been great with Lotte.“ Robbe stated acsolutely assured of his words, while Jana nodded in agreement in the video next to him.

Jens felt his heart ease up from tension. He was so thankful for his friends. Most of all Robbe. How had he deserved to find his best friend and keep him over all these years?

Even if everyone would leave at some point, included Lucas or anyone who would follow, Jens was frighteningly sure, that Robbe and him would stick together til the end. He couldn’t even place the reason for his strong belief. His best firend has just always been there next to him. The one constant in his life, since they met in first grade. 

„Robbe?“

„Yes?“

„I love you.“

Jens watched with great joy the face of his best friend, that brightened up into the brilliant smile that always lifted Jens up as well.

„Bro!“ Aaron declared, immediately accompanied by a stunning choir of awws and oows.

Lucas laughed next to him, his head resting again on Jens’s shoulder. He loved the weight. It meant that he wasn’t alone.

„I love you too.“ Robbe replied, still cheerful and grinning, yet certainly confused at the out-of-the-blue confession. Nonetheless both their declarations absolutely genuine in intent. Jens pondered if he ever had said these words on their own, and infront of others on top of it. But he just had felt right to say them out loud.

„Okay. Good night, everyone. Thanks for staying.“

„JENS! NO! You ca“

The audio of Luca screaming into her mic cut off, as Jens hit the red button to end the call. Quite pleased with himself. He knew that his friends weren’t satisfied with him just leaving. But it just was too funnny not to.

„So what do we do now with her?“ Jens said, pushing the laptop away, before lokking down at Lotte.

They settled on letting her sleep with them instead after Jens had suggested to carry her over. But of course Lotte had woken up from this and not the shouting voices minutes before. She had complained until Jens had told her that she could stay, to which she had asked for a goodnight kiss by both of them, before she sprawled herself across Jens’s side of the bed.

Lotte was back asleep not a minute later.

And though Jens rather would have had liked Lucas and him alone on their first night together after a week, he guessed that that would be some unfortunate part of his life now. He had said that out loud. And Lucas had only laughed on his way out to the bathroom, followed by Jens’s grumbling voice.

„Oh shut up. As if you hadn’t thought the same.“

__ __ __ tagged: @odi-et-amo85, @tayspots

[lunatic-fandom-space]

Im about to finally watch that NC review of The Wall after watching a bunch of videos about it and Im just gonna put my thoughts during it in this post

Okay I just checked this review has 85k dislikes, 22k likes and 1.5 million views Im scared

I also havent watched actually watched The Wall btw, but I did watch Folding Ideas video if that helps

Oh god I really liked NC in like 2019 and even the beginning of 2020 and his greeting is giving me vietnam flashbacks

I hate Dougs voice already

Okay a bunch of shit is happening

Now theyre just showing clips from the original movie but as a horrible montage with fire edited over it

Dougs face makes me uncomcortable and I hate looking at it

Hes singing again goddamnit

Thank god, an ad

He stopped singing again thank god

What the fuck is that

I hate those giggles theyre awful

Why is Doug Walker a vampire

The costuming is straight up awful what is the budget on this

The cg is so bad and outdated why did they even bother

What are these dance moves

Theyre mentioning twitter now???

I just watched that 3 musical minute sequence and I have no idea what Doug is even trying to say

He spat out a bird? Huh??

What

Bro the animation is so bad

This would literally be completely incoherent without the on the nose lyrics

"So long Oscar-bait song/smoke a bong and it'll feel less wrong" bro what

I havent even watched the fucking movie and even I know hes missing the point, how did I ever think his reviews were good

I didnt not need to see Doug Walker wailing about being Jesus while shirtless in front of badly edited stockphoto water

What is that

His acting is so bad and I still hate his face

Im not even halfway through

I just wanna go back to working on my AU while watching actually good longform reviews

I cant even read the comments bc I wanna focus on the review itself I hate it here

This frame is very blue. I love the color, but its kinda out of place and was probably not done on purpose

What now

What

Why

I wanna commit crimes

Have I mentioned that I hate looking at Dougs face

That was, without exageration, the worst sponsor Ive ever seen

ITS NOT OVER???

I too call the people I am writing a love letter to whiny and pretentious

Oh god

What in the world

I didnt think it was possible but Dougs singing voice just got worse

Dude they drew on his head with like, marker or something and I can see it smudge

He got all these people and all these props and had these wholeass songs written but he couldnt even brush his fucking teeth before going on Youtube

Okay theyre doing a full on twitter song

What is this shit

This is the most boomer centrist thing I have ever seen in my life

What the fuck was that

The eye imagery going on is geniuienly very unsettling and kind of disorienting but I cant really appreciate it bc its just so bad

What is that

AND AD THANK GOD

Back to the bullshit

What is that

The greenscreen looks so bad

Only 11 minutes lets fucking gooooooo

Doug Walker standing in that hallway doing a power stance is my new sleep paralasis demon

Dude what are they even doing

What is that squirrel thing on this random guys counter

I dont understand whats going on

What in the world is that furry nightmare squirrel in the studio

Why is the edgy cowboy furry OC lecturing me about The Arts

I legimately cant understand most of the words being said and I have no idea if its because my brain has been fried or because they just went with the first take of every line

This part of the review is usually praised as "the best part" so Im both intrigued and really scared

Oh god its another furry OC

Okay I actually quite like the design of the grey furry with the big hat and six arms I just really hate the way he moves, I think it would look better as a static model or preferably a 2d drawing

Another Ad!

I also like the black one with the white horns and red accents

Okay what the fuck is that

I mean the one with the way too many antlers is a bit better than the one before it but it looks like the designer kinda gave up at this point

This feels like an acid trip but in the worst way

I think this is the first thing Ive seen that had a dragon in it, that didnt make it better at all

I mean. i guess this is very impressive but why

I feel like every single voice actor for these creatures recorded the lyrics with a completely different mic

Hey, what the fuck

Well this sure is all happening

What

"Well, the movie ended on such an open vagueness that it only makes sense the the review end on such an open vagueness" hey fuckface, thats not how reviews work

Thank you musician guy who had no lines up until now (I think his name was Corey??)

All of this bullshit and for WHAT

Theyre singing the spongebob squarepants theme song

These 30 seconds where the most I enjoyed myself consecutively during this entire 40 minute video

I dont know how, but Doug Walker somehow manages to stay unlikeable even while hes shouting out a charity that probably does wonderful work

In conclusion, there is a total of 5 Things I Enjoyed in this 40 minute review:

That gray furry with the hat and six arms

That black furry with the horns and red accents and eyes

The shade of blue during that one very blue shot

The spongebob squarepants theme

Apparently Griff Taylor (the son of the musician guy, Corey Taylor) is a fan of NC for some reason and his dad pretty much did this for him, and I can appreciate that on some level

[riotwritesthings]

Only a Phone Call Away

WinterIron, E, 1.5k, phone sex, crack, humor | AO3

For the @winterironmonth​, NSFW Sunday, TROPE/AU: Sexting/Phone Sex

You caught me, all I do is write fluff and smut. And Crack. This is all Three.

-

Bucky is heading towards the gym when his phone vibrates in his pocket. He wiggles it out, still talking to Steve, and barely glances down at the screen, just to see if it’s important.

It’s from Tony, and it says ‘Waking up without your fingers inside me? Tragic.’

Bucky walks into a door frame.

Steve gives him a confused look, notices the phone still clutched in his hand, and quickly says “I don’t want to know.”

Bucky doesn't text him back, because he has a lot of shit to get done today and Tony can’t be encouraged. The flaw in this plan, of course, is that Tony doesn’t need to be encouraged, and in fact takes being ignored as a personal challenge. Bucky remembers this far, far too late.

By the time he finishes training Bucky had a whole slew of texts waiting for him, and he makes strangled noises as he reads through the list.

‘It’s really too bad no one is bending me over this table right now.’

‘I can sit without wincing and honestly it is a crime. Someone should take responsibility for this.’

On and on and on the texts go, that patented Tony mix of ridiculous and hot as fuck and Bucky’s face gets progressively more red until Steve rolls his eyes and leaves the locker room without him.

‘My mouth is very empty right now. Just putting it out there.’ says the last one, and Bucky can’t fully contain a groan because he does not need the reminder of what Tony’s lips look like wrapped around his cock right now.

‘Then go eat lunch you maniac’ Bucky texts him back, even though Tony is currently in California and it’s a little too early for lunch on the other side of the country.

Tony sends him a picture of a suspiciously shaped sausage, and Bucky doesn’t know what he did to deserve this.

It only gets worse when Tony actually does eat. Bucky checks his phone while Clint pouts over losing the latest round of Super Smash Bro’s, and finds several new messages.

‘The only thing rearranging my guts right now is this kale smoothie, and it’s just not the same as your dick.’

‘My mouth is sadly empty of your cock. This hoagie just ain’t cuttin it baby.’

Bucky sputters and accidentally says out loud “what the fuck Tony, just eat your lunch.”

Clint shoots him a sideways look and demands “why can’t you people be normal?”

Bucky only makes it halfway through the afternoon. The final straw is the short video Tony sends him, must have been taken when Tony got dressed that morning because Bucky recognizes the background of Tony’s Malibu bedroom. He also recognizes the white lace panties that Tony is pulling on, has extremely fond memories of carefully removing them with his teeth, in fact, and the video ends right after Tony lets them snap into place and leaves just enough time to show the way his ass jiggles with it.

Bucky falls down the stairs.

“I can’t lie to you,” Bruce says, looking down at him and shaking his head, “I am going to be telling everyone about this.”

Bucky flips him off, pulls himself to his feet, and locks himself in his room to call Tony. “I am on the other side of the country!” He hisses in lieu of any kind of greeting, face still red and pants still uncomfortably tight.

“Are you? Must have slipped my mind,” Tony says, all faux innocence, and Bucky lets out a miserable groan. “You been thinking about me, baby?” Tony asks, and Bucky can just hear the way Tony is fluttering his eyelashes obnoxiously.

It still sends a bolt of heat straight to Bucky’s gut, has his slumping lower on his couch and groaning out “you know I have, fuck, even before you sent those messages. ‘M always thinkin’ about you.”

“Sweet talker,” Tony accuses, but his voice has taken on that breathy edge that Bucky loves.

Bucky is about to make some very filthy promises about exactly how sweet he’s going to be when Tony gets home, when the alarm goes off.

“Please tell me that’s not what I think it is,” Tony says with a miserable whine.

“Duty calls,” Bucky says, and he can’t quite hide his own misery behind his attempts to sound smug as he says “that’s what you get.”

“Okay, but I just want you to know,” Tony says, and nearly has to shout to be heard over Bucky’s protests as he finishes “I am currently hard and leaking all over this nice lace and I could really use some help getting out of it!”

“You’re the worst,” Bucky groans as his own cock gives a hard twitch, and he’d swear the alarm gets pointedly louder.

He ends up on a stupid top secret mission, because of course he does. Bucky isn’t allowed to have nice things, like phone sex with his boyfriend. He’s also not allowed to have his phone on him, radio silence and all that, but no one said anything about his secret phone that no one knows he has, so Bucky keeps that.

Tony made it, especially for times like these, and no one is going to be able to hack it. Bucky very nearly wishes he hadn’t, because every time he checks the phone there’s at least one new text from Tony.

‘Fun fact: studies show four of my fingers are smaller than three of yours.’ Tony texts him, and then a line of winking faces that Bucky really did not need, he can picture what Tony means perfectly well.

During a spare moment between fire fights, Bucky gets a text that says ‘My throat is sore and it isn’t because I choked on your cock.’

‘SEE A DOCTOR TONY’ he texts back, hitting the screen a little more aggressively than needed, and then has to move as the gun fire starts up again.

Three days in they get half a night of peace, because even super soldiers need rest occasionally, and the first thing Bucky does is find a bathroom to lock himself in, pointedly ignoring Steve’s glare.

“Baby you gotta stop,” he says as soon as Tony answers the phone, “my dick has been hard for three days and it’s starting to hurt.”

“You know what doesn’t hurt?” Tony asks without missing a beat, grin practically audible.

Bucky sighs and resists the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose as he says “don’t say your-“

”My ass!” Tony declares, loudly, and Bucky definitely hears someone groan miserably in the background on Tony’s end before a door slams shut.

“‘M gonna make you regret this,” Bucky growls, pressing the heel of his hand against his cock through his pants because oh, he has such a long list of things he’s going to do in the name of payback. “Remember when you came back from that couple days overseas?”

“Fuck,” Tony groans in response, nearly drowned out by the sounds of him rapidly shedding his clothes and yeah, he remembers.

“Gonna do worse to you this time, sweet thing,” Bucky promises, smirking viciously when Tony lets out an uneven moan, distinct sounds of him jerking himself off coming in even through the spotty connection. “Thought it was bad when you couldn’t sit for a week? Gonna keep you in that bed so long, fuck you so hard, you’re not gonna be able to move by the time I’m done with you. ‘M gonna have to carry you everywhere and everyone’s gonna know it’s cuz I fuckin’ broke you an’ you loved it.”

“Bucky,” Tony moans, his every breath a keening whine and the slick sound of his hand moving over his cock sounds almost painfully fast, desperate in a way that never fails to set Bucky’s blood on fire, has him frantically tearing open his own pants to get a hand on himself.

“You wanna tease me all fuckin’ week?” Bucky demands, equal parts frustrated and furiously turned on, “I’m gonna make you come so many times you forget words, not gonna know anythin’ but sobbin’ for it.”

“Fuck, fuck,” Tony gasps, and the comes with a drawn out moan that pushes Bucky over the edge too, has him biting down a low groan as he spills into his hand. “Hot damn,” Tony sighs, sounding breathless and smug, and Bucky can’t stop a soft, fond laugh from slipping out of him.

“You gonna stop distractin’ me now?” Bucky asks although yeah, he can admit he’s way less grumpy about it now that he’s covered in the warm haze of orgasm. ”Got me thinkin’ with my dick all the damn time, gonna get me killed,” he adds, just in case Tony has forgotten he’s on a dangerous mission.

“I’ll behave,” Tony promises, in that tone that means he absolutely won’t, and Bucky can’t help another soft huff of laughter.

He has another text waiting for him when he wakes up.

‘Sitting on the couch watching bad tv WITHOUT your dick in me? Just not the same. 2/10 stars.’

Bucky maybe accidentally breaks the phone. In the interest of his own sanity and survival.

[weeklyfangirl]

Frat Boy Pt. 19

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7 (1), part 7 (2), part 8, part 9, part 10, part 11, part 12, part 13 , part 14, part 15, part 16, part 17, part 18

You’re a gal on a mission in this one. And you’re determined to get answers one way or another ;) Share this with a friend and drag them them along for a roller coaster ride too! xx 

“This is a bad idea,” Renny muttered. We were parked a street away from the frat house, waiting for the boy who’d been ignoring me the past week to appear and get in his car. Granted, I’d only reached out once, but still. He’d never replied. Never reached out. It was the radio silence that scared me more than any gang tags. Ignorance might be bliss, but conscious ignorance was hell.

 After our dinner, I’d woken up to my car in the driveway. The windshield clean. Spotless, even. He must’ve hardly gotten sleep. 

 “Why is this necessary again? Do you think he’s cheating on you?” Renny asked. 

 I shook my head too quickly at the word cheating, because even if he was seeing somebody else it wouldn’t technically be cheating. We’d never even defined this. The only thing I hated more than knowing I was in the dark were gray zones. I shook my head too soon, though. What else could I tell her? I couldn’t exactly tell her the truth - that I think I’m being targeted as a cause of Harry’s random association with a gang and that we need to follow him to confirm my crazy conspiracies so I can affirm that one, I am not crazy, and two, I can reach a decision about whether I should talk to the cops. 

 That was too complicated.

 “Actually, you’re right. I think he’s seeing someone else.” I let the lie slip from my lips.

 “Shit. You think he’s seeing Viv?” 

 I wanted to smile at the edge in her voice. The first evidence she didn’t really like the girl either. “He already told me they slept together,” I said casually, as though I’d mentioned I ate Cheerios for breakfast again.

 Renny almost spat. “Ew!! Seriously? I mean, I guess we kind of already thought that. But still…-” she shivered “-GROSS.” 

 “Yeah. Gross,” I agreed. Something stirred next to the bins, and I clutched her arm. But it wasn’t Harry. The random associate walked on, blissfully unaware of the two girls watching his every move and so completely disappointed by his presence. We both sighed. 

 “Wait, he’s behind him!” Renny screeched. 

 Sure enough, Harry emerged, trailing behind the associate. His hair looked damp. He’d probably showered after practice, then. They did some sort of weird bro handshake and parted ways. 

 A beep of an alarm and Harry slid into his Maserati. Let the chase begin.

 “Still can’t believe he drives that thing to school,” Renny muttered. “I mean I would if I had one, too, but … cheating prick.” 

 I had to hand it to Renny. Even if someone was the most likeable person in the world, if they’d done something to cross her friends, she’d find a way to make them the most detestable. At least in her eyes. 

 We waited as he revved the engine and pulled out. He drove fast, but thankfully Renny’s VW could keep up. Grandpa would’ve been a different story. 

 “Where the hell are we going?” 

 “I don’t know.” I fought the urge to add ‘that’s the problem.’

 We travelled towards the coast before he senselessly veered inland again, ending up somewhere I’d never been before. We trailed him slowly, past locked up storefronts, and tagged alleyways, until he turned into a gritty-looking neighborhood. We slowed around the corner, making sure to keep several streets between us. 

 Around the bend, Harry suddenly slammed on his brakes. Renny lurched forward. 

 “What the fuck-” Renny ducked lower in her seat. “Do you think he saw us?”

 In the split two seconds I had, I wagered our chances of reversing and getting through this unseen. But my split two seconds were up, and I hadn’t moved. 

 The motor ran as he got out of the car, calmly, not bothering to shut the door. He’d known. He’d known all along. Time slowed when he faced us, arms crossed, squinting as his judgement penetrated through his Ray Bans all the way through the windshield. He stalked towards our car. No one was around in the rundown neighborhood street to yell at us to get our cars moving. No one could save me from this eternal embarrassment slowly mounting with each step of his black Chelsea boots. 

 The gig was up. 

 I rolled down my window when he tapped on the glass.

 “Go home,” he ordered. 

 I scoffed. “Really? You haven’t talked to me all week and those are the first words you’re going to say to me?” 

 He stepped backwards, acknowledging nothing. “Go. Home,” pointing the direction whence we came. 

 “We weren’t even following you. We were already in the neighborhood asshole!” Renny yelled. 

 I couldn’t have it end like this. I couldn’t have another week of silence, of questions unanswered. The plan was to follow him and see where he ran off to, not utterly expose my desperation. But now that plan was obliterated. Was this it? Was this seriously how he wanted to end things so… pointlessly?

 I opened the car door, running after his sulking frame. The second I placed a hand on his shoulder blade, he whipped around. I cowered. 

 He hadn’t needed to bare his teeth or shout at me to be intimidating. This oppressive darkness rolled off of him in waves, knocking me down repeatedly just when I saw the shore. Like a tired sailor, I’d return to the ocean, knowing the damage it could cause, but knowing it was worth it. It would be worth it… if I could only see beneath the surface. 

 He flinched as I pulled the shades off, but he didn’t look at me. My hand went along his jaw, against the slight stubble that’d made its way through. He relented.

 His pupils were blasted, almost shadowing the outer ring of green. 

 “I changed because of you,” I breathed. Something flashed in his eyes. Something beneath the darkened surface. “I’m not the same as I was before. And I don’t know even know how to… express it. I don’t even know if that’s a good thing,” I admitted. He opened his mouth, but I raised a hand. “I need to know what you’re not telling me. The old me could’ve gone without it, but who I am now? I can’t.” 

 But it was like he only heard half of what I’d said. “I never asked you to be in my life, Y/N.”

 “No, that’s right. You just swindled me into it by pretending to be dumb. You’re a little too good of an actor.”  

 It was his turn to scoff. “No one’s making you run after me.” 

 “No one’s making you be a complete and utter asshole right now, either. Besides yourself. Can you just-” I pushed his chest- “PLEASE. I’m clearly tired of getting nowhere.” 

 Harry looked at his watch, and his jaw clicked. “You know for someone so concerned with their life, you certainly don’t seem to have much of one.” His eyes bore into mine. 

 I swallowed, hard, unmoving though it stung. “I know Viv’s in on it.” 

 It was a stab in the dark, but it worked. He nearly growled.

 I heard Renny open her door behind me.

 “She’s involved in a lot of parts of my life, Y/N. But at least she doesn’t ask too many questions. And she sure as shit doesn’t overstep,” he growled. 

 “We both know I’m not Viv.” 

 “Yeah,” he chuckled. “You’re right…” His eyes levelled with mine. At least she actually fucks me.” 

 I felt like he should’ve stayed, watch the awful betrayal fill my eyes. But he walked away as the air was ripped from my lungs. I wanted to scream, I wanted to run up to him, push him to the ground and tell him-! 

 ...tell him what? 

 It was true. 

 He paused at the car door, not even trying to face me. “Get yourself home.” 

 I didn’t see him drive away. I just heard the slam of the car door as he left me, halfway up the hill. 

 Renny pulled the car up next to me, and I suddenly felt dirty. Like I needed a shower. A very hot, scalding shower, that would burn every inch of him off my body forever. 

 “What’s the plan?” she asked.  

 Clearly, our plan to trail the subject in very deep question had turned out very deeply miserable. 

 In a close encounter, the sailor realizes fairly quickly that the ocean holds all the power to kill them. But the second they acknowledge that, they don’t abandon what they’re looking for. 

 “Can you drop me off at a friend’s?” I asked.

 They just get a bigger ship. 

 -----------

 The just-built senior apartments were the envy of everyone on campus. Modern architecture and sleek interior made it THE choicest option for the upperclassmen - especially the athletes. It was the next best thing for those not living in fraternities or sororities.

 It was also the most expensive on-campus housing available. You could live there if you were rich enough, but more importantly, if you were lucky enough. There was one other way you could live here, though. Chapman held a raffle to “make our housing opportunity equal for everyone.” Which, was bullshit, considering the apartment only reserved four out of sixty rooms for those “raffle winners.” Four raffle winners, out of four THOUSAND upperclassmen.  

 Felix and Zayn had some pretty insane luck. 

 I knocked on their door, antsy as I thought of their probable reaction: “Why is Y/N standing beyond our door on a Thursday night without Renny?” She was my strongest link to them. I’d begged her to come up with me, but she wasn’t budging. Though she wouldn’t admit it, she was a little annoyed at spending the whole day only to have found no other woman and to have been told off by Harry - who she now deems worse than Lying Panty Tossing Baby. 

 A tall athletic-built woman eyed me as she carried their trash down the hall. 

 Felix opened the door. 

 “Oh, hey.” It was the awkward I remember you but we aren’t friends dance. “S’been a while. Come in.” 

 I noticed he was at least 6’ 2” as I moved past him into the foyer where Zayn and Andre paused the video game. They had a whole tech center set up around the T.V. and dull EDC music came from their speaker system. 

 Andre waved and Zayn’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Hey! What’re you doing here?” He moved a pizza box out of his way to head to the open kitchen. Before I could answer, he returned with a cracked beer, handing it to me. 

 “Thanks,” I said, taking a sip out of politeness. Old Da Vinci maps hung on their walls along with tasteful sketches of nude women, and a framed vintage Star Wars poster was in the hallway. 

 “Where’s Renny?” Felix asked, arms crossed as he sat on the arm of the couch. He’d meant it to be casual, but it wasn’t quite casual enough.

 I didn’t want to be the one to break his heart and tell him about Niall if he didn’t already know. And something told me Renny wasn’t cruel enough to rub it in his face. “Uh, not sure. She had to buzz off somewhere though.” To Niall’s bed. I looked between the three of them. “All of you got so. Lucky. With this place. I almost didn’t believe it when Renny told me.” 

 “Not me!” Andre lifted his beer and dramatically pounded it, slamming it down on the table next to the other four beers.

 “Woah-ugh! Pa! That’s mahogany!” Felix spluttered. 

 “You found it at a garage sale!” 

 “It’s still mahogany!” he squeaked. His gangly arms flailed before adjusting his collar. “Either I’m never donating furniture to this apartment again - or you’re not allowed back in this apartment again. Or both.”

 Andre didn’t answer, just fell flat on the couch. Something was off with him. The energy shifted in the room as the guys eyed Andre. I’d clearly come at a wrong time. 

 “I can swing by later, I know you guys were in the middle of a... game…” 

  Zayn swatted his hand. “No, you’re fine. He’s just…” 

 Andre perked up, awaiting Zayn’s next words. 

 “You want to tell her?” Zayn finished. 

 Andre let out an awkward moan. “You know how date night is coming up?”

 My brows stitched. 

 “No??” He cleared his throat, surprised he had to explain. “So Sig Chi’s date night is coming up and basically we just bring a date, and… party. There’s a theme and everything. You really haven’t heard about this?”

 I shook my head.

 “Huh. It’s kind of a big deal that’s why I’m kind of... huh.”  

 “When is it?” I asked.

 “Tomorrow.” 

 “Tomorrow?!” I paused, thoroughly confused. Had Niall told Renny about this? And if it was Sigma Chi then… Harry must already have a date. For tomorrow. My blood boiled thinking that could be part of the reason why he’d dropped off the face of the Earth this week. So he wouldn’t have to take me as his date. 

 “Mine cancelled on me,” Andre said, running a hand over defined black coils. 

 “Dude, for the hundredth time, it’s not that big of a deal.” 

 “You’re not the one in a frat, Felix!” He laughed humorlessly before landing in a pile on the couch again. In a rare moment, I laughed with him. It was slightly ridiculous how important parties were.

 “Oh-kay,” Felix muttered. His blonde hair flopped on the couch next to Andre. He looked up to me, shrugging. “He’s helpless. Without the distraction of video games. Absolutely helpless.” 

 Zayn gave me a once-over. “You’re in the sorority with Renny, aren’t you?” 

 “Uh, yeah. Kind of. Not officially official yet. Kind of in the process of everything right now. Uh, but” -his eyes narrowed from my rambling- “Yeah. Yeah, I’m in it,” I settled on. 

 Andre came to life again. “Would you go with me?” 

 “Oh! Uh…” 

 “You don’t have to,” Zayn offered. 

 “I can do it. I wasn’t doing anything anyways.” The Netflix I was betraying threw a tantrum in the back of my mind. This weekend I’d been wanting to do nothing but lay low, and preferably, in bed.  

 But if today taught me anything, it’s that my plans clearly never work out too well.

 “Seriously?! It’ll only be a couple hours, I won’t make you stay the whole time. Actually, you can leave whenever you want. Just walk in with me.” 

 “Excuse me?” I asked, half-smiling. 

 “Okay, that sounded bad.” He let out a breathless laugh. “What I meant to say was, thank you. You’ll have a great time.” He threw up the finger guns. 

 Zayn nudged my shoulder with his beer. “Want to go on the balcony?” His eyes bore into mine, and I knew that he knew this wasn’t just a friendly visit. A slight chill ran through me at his perception. It was unnerving how he always seemed to… know. But I guess I shouldn’t judge him for having a keen sixth sense. 

 I let him lead me to the sliding glass door.  

 “Oh, the theme’s James Bond, too! So dress like a Bond girl!” Andre called after us. 

 “Like heels?” I asked. But Zayn slid the door shut behind us. It was dark out, but inside I could see Andre give me a thumbs up before resuming the video game with Felix. 

 “Saved his life. Mate wouldn’t stop gabbin’ ‘bout how gutted he was.” Zayn muttered. The flick of a lighter grabbed my attention. The slight orange illuminated dark features and hollowed cheeks as he took a drag. There was no denying he was handsome, especially in this mood lighting. He probably could’ve been recruited for any fraternity off looks alone, but something told me he wouldn’t step near the place. His vibe was too… anti-organization. He blew the smoke over his shoulder. 

 “Very tortured artist of you,” I noted.

 His head tilted at tortured as if throwing the title back to me. “Artist, maybe. Tortured, no.” 

 “What’s a yes for you, then?” 

 “Yes to whateva you’ve been plannin’ on asking me,” he smirked. “Must’ve been important if you didn’t find me in the studio.” 

 I looked down, then out at the city. Thousands of little people scattered everywhere. Students crawling from late-night classes on the fringes of campus looked like ants. I held my thumb up for scale. Verified ants. Maybe smaller. 

 “I came here to find a different perspective.” My hand fell. I faced him square. “Your perspective.” 

 He took another drag, letting the smoke fill the space between us. “On?” 

 I was a little surprised he didn’t know.

 “Harry.”  

 If he didn’t know, he also didn’t seem too surprised. He leaned against the railing, hazel eyes undressing desperate thoughts. “What do you want to know?” he asked, voice barely above a whisper.

 The ash from his cigarette floated down to his feet, but an unseen wind carried it up again, rolling over and down like dirty snowflakes to the street below. 

 “I know he doesn’t like you.” 

 Zayn’s laugh was light, soft, but carried the same fullness as Renny’s. “Perceptive girl, ya? S’not what you want to know though is it.” 

 “Why is he so scared of you?” His brow arched, and I could tell I was losing him. “What do you know?” I clarified. 

 Another drag and his shoulders straightened. “Thought you were flatterin’ me there for a second.” Something glimmered in his eyes, something just beyond the surface, and I looked away before I could see anything more than friendly. “Can I ask you somethin’ in return?” 

 I nodded. 

 “Why do you want to know?” he murmured. 

 “I just want to understand.”

 “Mm,” he hummed, the treble of his voice like slow-spilling silk. “Curiosity killed the cat.” 

 I swallowed a little too loudly, but his words hit a little too closely. 

 “S’all right,” he continued. “S’human nature t’want to understand.” He cocked his head a little. “I actually met Harry before school started during the summer. I was working at Hilltop Resort.”

 “Really?” 

 “I was his server.” He let out a short breath as if he couldn’t believe it happened. “Tipped well, actually.” 

 “I remember you working there!” Faint summer memories of Renny whisking us away for lunch on our treat yourself day came back, stirring faint feelings of happiness. It seemed so long ago. I felt like I’d aged five years in three months. “So let me get this straight. He doesn’t like you because you’re in the service industry?” I spat.

 He winced. “No, s’more like…” He took a breath. “There was a coworker of mine. He wasn’t mean, but he wasn’t exactly nice either. Kept to himself on breaks, never really chatted with any of us except to flirt with the bartender. Anyway, I used to see Harry a lot there, but when Jack got promoted Harry’d only sit in Jack’s section.”

 I crossed my arms, the night time air finally sinking in. 

 “I didn’t think too much of it at first,” he admitted. The cigarette moved in his mouth, hand fiddling with the lighter. “But one night I was running out to give a guest the card they’d left behind, but I saw them together instead.” 

 Before I could picture Harry and Zayn’s coworker making out against the wall, he continued - “He was giving Harry stacks of cash.”

 Flashbacks of Viv trying to pass Harry money in the Catalina Island bar played out like a movie in my mind. 

 “What’d you do?” I pressed.

 He shrugged. “I saw Harry slip something else in his pocket. It looked like a little bag. Must’ve been a bonus.” He muttered the last words. 

 “A bonus for what?” 

 “I didn’t know then. I just thought he’d somehow found a way to steal from the manager’s safe and was splitting the profits.”

 “Why give it to Harry though?” 

 “That’s what I couldn’t figure out.” He leaned in. “I saw them together a few more times. The second was an accident. Third, not so much. Harry saw me that time. Then before I left for the night, I searched his locker. Took me a while, but I found some pills. Little bag of coke, too. He came in right when I was putting it back.” 

 “No.” 

 “Yeah. He didn’t say anything. Just stared at me like he was going to kill me. I got my shit and got the hell out of there. Next day, the boss said they received a tip to check my locker and they found the drugs in mine. You know the fucked up bit? I was fired.” 

 “But it wasn’t yours!” 

 “Doesn’t matter. Still found it there.” Zayn stamped out his cigarette, blowing away the last smoke. I guess pity was etched in my face, because he suddenly turned defensive. “Don’t look at me like that. I work at Javier’s now. I’m fine.” 

 Javier’s was the fancy Mexican restaurant overlooking the Pacific. He was doing more than fine.

 “That’s still not fair to you,” I muttered.

 “I didn’t want to be involved, anyway. S’better I left one way or another.” 

 “What was his name again? Your coworker’s?”

 “Jack.” 

 Jack. Why did that sound so familiar? 

 “He’s not sound, you know,” Zayn added. 

 “Well clearly if he gave you murder eyes.” 

 “No, not Jack. Harry. He’s not…”

 “Sound,” I repeated. The word felt heavy on my tongue.

 Zayn nodded, tucking a cigarette behind his ear.

 “I can’t believe Harry got you fired.” 

 “Well, I don’t exactly know. Jack must’ve been the one to move the drugs into my locker.”

 “Yeah, but who told him to?”

 Zayn didn’t answer. The facts had been there this entire time, but I didn’t want to see it. I still didn’t want to see it. But Zayn was here, undeniably linking them together for me. Harry and drugs and money were three things that’d been circulating in the same place much longer than I could know. For some reason beyond me, Harry was a dealer. Or ran as head of them. Which meant his association with the men who’d assaulted me was… what? A business deal gone wrong?

 “England’s a small country, you see the same faces everywhere. Like here, if you’re perceptive enough. And in each, he’s jus’... involved in something bigger, while at the same time trying to hide. S’like he’s a magnet for infamy to his own detriment.” 

 “Are you referring to his adoption?” 

 He twisted the cigarette behind his ear, realizing I didn’t really need an answer to this question and that now I was just testing him for what he knew. “Contrary to what he may believe, I don’t know everything.” 

 But I couldn’t fight the feeling that he was talking about me. Smooth artist’s fingers fiddled with the lighter again, but he didn’t light the second cigarette. He knew more than what he was telling me. 

 But even the new me didn’t want to hear much else tonight.  

 “You don’t want to stay?” he asked.

 I didn’t realize I was walking towards the door ‘til his words stopped me in my tracks. Disappointment tinged his words. I felt a little guilty, heading out the door as soon as I’d gotten what I’d needed. 

 But I was tired. And sadly, unless there was a sketch pad in front of him, I didn’t know what else we could talk about. I didn’t know what else he’d see. 

 I shook my head, and he lit the cigarette, not bothering to walk me out. 

 ------

Racing down the spindly halls, my heart pounded out of my chest. I heard the cries above the whispers of the Watchers, and they grew louder with a sickening urgency. A gutteral wailing meant for me. 

 I looked down the hall, awaiting the dark shadow to appear from the walls, when he’d creep closer, suffocatingly closer. 

 The door wouldn’t open, not past an inch. 

 But he called for me, this time. My name fell from unseen lips.

 “Y/N,” he called. It was hoarse. He was scared. I’d never heard that cry before. This time it wasn’t solid air the door was against - it was pills. Tiny pills, hundreds of them, thousands of them, multiplying on top of each other until they filled what I could see of the room. Until they were spilling out the crack. 

 “Y/N!!!” His voice was panicked, but muffled. It was muffled now. Why wasn’t he opening the door?? Why couldn’t he reach me?? The shadow drew closer. It surrounded me, outside, every inch of the hall covered by darkness. 

 My heartbeat was the only sound. 

 A waterfall of pills. The glint of a knife. 

 I couldn’t reach him in time. 

 I couldn’t save Harry. 

 I couldn’t even save myself.

part 20

[nobody-knose--archive]

well, today i figured i didn’t have anything better to do & liveblogged the pingry ep. it’s probably a better stepping stone further into the tally void than incomplete demos, coming right off of complete demos, at least.

-from what i know this one basically includes all the mmmm songs that weren't on complete demos (andrew singing ones wahoo) & the expected demos that didn't end up anywhere else + just a friend. i also believe this one was recorded similarly to complete demos so i really have no clue what to expect for taken for a ride's vocals. anyway here i go

-the bidding sounds impressively professional to start things off, but i suppose humming isn't a terribly complex technique anyway. the intro feels a little longer th

-whoah there if that aint a marked difference in audio quality here we go

-guitars also sound different & i don't remember if this album has steve or ross on it i now realize

-goodness the mixing is wonky for rob's segment. the backing vocals do not need to bounce between channels

-why do they have kinda weird voices for the chorus. sounds like they're trying an accent or something. i can barely recognize who's singing

-the keyboard backing in zubin's segment sounds the same as usual, as in, it sounds so stupidly similar to the questions answered backing music that i'm offended i couldn't pick up they're the same for so long

-less echo on disappear actually. at least they still had the brass section

-still a weird sound on the chorus but maybe i can chalk that up to different mixing & more red

-outro sounds not super different. still very good drumming on display which will give me the push i need to decide it's ross drumming

-however i don't hear him shouting out the auctioneer stuff, and given that it was presented as a video during the mmmm recording, i might assume it was done specially for the mmmm releases, so maybe he didn't drum for this album after all

-it does have a greater similarity to the live performances even if the keyboarding is using a different synth

-well now. that's a real piano

-and as any piano will be when played that low, it's out of tune. very

-and everyone's singing? i can't hear andy in the slightest. this is interesting

-i mean i can certainly hear him doing plenty on the piano. but. it's interesting

-i suppose given the ep's hallmanac description, as a compilation of acoustic/one-take recordings i shouldn't be surprised taken for a ride is this different. but boy is it jarring. sounds incredibly different without the heavy synthesizing and complementary instruments

-barebones certainly. not much more of a way to describe it. that's what i expected just not in this way. i like the sound of this bridge though

-do very much wish i could hear andrew's actual voice. even at acoustic live performances he would sing at the very least. then again, that was years later i suppose.

-and it's only now at the final chorus that i realize, somehow, this is a piano-only song. no guitar, no drums even. that's really interesting. even the album version had some drums & bass

-red's singing isn't as impressive here. not as many high notes. understandable. bitch

-different rhythm on the quick part! bet steve feels lucky he didn't have to drum this part although i am hearing some sort of. pants-slapping? now that would be a sight to behold irl

-and that's the end

-goodness. be born. considering how this song was always & every time performed acoustic live i really expect to hear nothing here i haven't from concert recordings

-we're missing whatever the hell that skittery little shaker is called. alas i am not a percussionist & do not know the name of every auxilliary instrument ever

-rippin it up on the melodica bay be. a suitable replacement for whistling considering that never was all that good live. nobody can compare to bora karaca at whistling

-there's extra bass harmonies on display here. swell

-also no percussion i'm realizing

-da-da-da!

-but yeah normally ross uses brushes on a box/seat drum (also don't know what that's called!) for some good gentle percussion & it's not here. really hoping this won't be a trend because i'm fond of drumming even if it's from stebev himself

-bah (chorus) bah

-wait a minute that's not a bah! that's a doo! big difference! what are you doing rob

-i can tell it's one-take because rob has to take a breath in the middle of that final long bah there

-ooh dropping off the guitar there real quick are you? and not even doing the full outro too. good way to spice things up at the end.

-honestly maybe the reason i & so many other th fans dislike be born so much isn't even the country sound and weird subject matter, it's the fact that this song lacks a whole lot of the variability that might separate it from other music. in the album versions there are violins/fiddles, and the live versions... don't have that. maybe some halfway decent whistling at best. it just is what it is. especially compared to the rest of mmmm- g&e could often be more faithfully recreated on stage, but mmmm got to mix things up most of the time, except for be born. food for thought

-anyway. of all the songs i would expect to be absolutely completely identical (other than be born) the whole world and you definitely takes the cake. a delightful song. i should listen to it more.

-but yeah it was a toy orchestra piece long before a tally hall piece, and toy orchestra was & is nothing but silly little live performances. how on earth could they make this one completely different

-other than. the "punk rehearsal" i've heard of from incomplete demos. that's just. a thing i think

-oh hold on i didn't even listen to the end of be born there was a tiny outro with chat at the end oh that's adorable

-hey i can hear andrew's voice! nice!

-starting off with a full ensemble vocals, all sorts of harmonies in action, and a normal piano instead of a toy piano, so already i'm being proven decently wrong on this song's inability to be greatly altered

-other than that. i kinda like how it sounds as if they're stumbling over their words at points

-boy has andrew's voice changed hasn't it. i know i haven't listened to the solo albums so i'm not exactly one to speak but he really developed his singing a lot over time

-clapping live & not in a studio sure sounds a lot worse, especially when it's like 4 people max doing it and not a whole crowd

-zubin (i'm pretty sure) flexing on us all at the end there. good for him

-ayyyyyyy

-it's the song that's sure to invoke an emotional response out of me >:}

-it's also the song i was convinced had andrew vocals in the background (the badadum's between verses) for a good while. still not 100% certain it's rob instead but it's not like i can ask them themselves

-yeah i'll admit it right here this is the song i listen to when i'm going through emotional turmoil. not this version of the song, and no, i don't mean i listen to i'm gonna win or even the tally hall rock version of this one. i mean i listen to the cover of it from we think we're playing in a band. and that's enough on this subject!

-however given the above information yeah i am pretty familiar with this song already. not a new experience right here

-i greatly appreciate the heavy piano work. it's one of my favorite parts about the song

-oh and i should stop talking about that subject right there as well. actually i think i should just say nothing about this song in general. you'll see why in about uhh pauses video

-this friday or so? damn that's sooner than i thought lucky me

-everything will be fine! i'll be making it through!

-oh hello there. "ALBUM" is not a word beamed directly into my brain with great volume thank you very much

-so. it's the outro to good day done with weird haste. looping. no actual chord pro-

-this is. is this some sort of radio performance? what the hell is going on

-steven!!! hello there thanks for the confirmation & god is it surreal to hear his name truly uttered in the context of red rob zubin andrew. wow

-pingry school spring fling. how the hell have i never heard about whatever the hell this track is before

-wait- is it over? song listed as good day but it's in fact the outro to good day done on. a radio program maybe. and now it's a really strange sounding performance of yearbook

-i genuinely can't tell if there's a filter on rob's voice or if the micro- shit that's loud

-what in the hell is going on is this another radio performance or something? like ok yearbook at least was on songs about girls by listedblack but i really want this to be made clear soon

-all i really think i need to know about yearbook is that it's another rob "heterophobic homophonic" cantor angsty boy band song and. listening to it for the first time her. that impression sure isn't going away

-at least i get to hear andrew twinkling those ivories in the back. got a good sound. even if the mixing here is all sorts of wack. a song this complex should not be performed live with only like one microphone

-alright rob i get it you were in love with a girl- and it's over? ok

-live performance of just a friend holy shit hell yes hell yes hell yes for some reason i thought this would be the studio version but no

-i cannot imagine what this song will sound like with steve on the drums hell yes oh will there be banter will rob forget his lines will red say some random 4-syllable phrase will zubin be the best singer in the whole damn band give me an answer now

-already hearing some banter :}

-they're moving weirdly fast and andrew's already got the piano playing even in the beatboxing part. wowie

-ooh kick it andy do those riffs hell yeah

-"that sounded fishy... zubin sedghi!" i'm in love

-KICK IT ANDY

-AND ZUBIN

-and there's the drums! go stevie. go stevie

-good ness andrew just will not let up on the sick as hell keyboarding will he fukc yeah bro kill it

-rob sounds unbelievably tired for this i'm half expecting him to trip up the lyrics at any moment

-"i don't buy it" "don't gimmie that!" you say it boys. oh classic zubin line right there preserved on an official tally hall recording for all eternity, what a treasure this is

-hm isn't this a bit early to go into the pseudo-breakdown chorus? no it works. andrew still rippin it up of course

-and there's the tambourine bay be!

-buildup to the "oh snap" isn't as intense as it could get in later performances which i will gladly blame in its entirety on steve <3

-boy oh boy does rob's voice just sound generally different here. so young so so young

-shooby-doo-wah. well i had low expectations which were not quite fulfilled but it's technically more than what we got on the studio recording so. i won't complain

-THERE IT IS

-BARBEQUE SAUCE BAY BE

-what a fool i was to pause the moment he said it. silly old me <3

-no, no, thank you for coming! but hold on one second. is there not... one more track? technically not a song, technically something i think i've heard before, but if i take a step over to the tally archive...

-cell phone call.

-circus you say? if i had to guess it's the whole world & you given the 08 version of the song but that's a vague guess. can't think of anything better but my current answer isn't that good on its own

-ah! it's joey jo joseph. this wouldn't happen to be that phone call spoken of that, like, invited joe into the band in the first place, would it? i remember that story from an old bio or something, but it doesn't seem like the type of thing that'd be recorded & put on an album. hard to say

-pj? like a certain rob cator frat dude voice JP!?

-well well well now. i'm not sure what to say. i don't recognize that song they're playing as the outro. it could either be some vague listedblack or miscellaneous early tally hall song lost to the void or a demo. i wouldn't exactly know. anyway that ends the pingry ep. shorter than i thought it be, lucky old me. hope you enjoyed!

[mischiefandspirits]

Iron Legion (11/?)

Never let it be said that Tony Stark ever does things by half. He might have grown up with little family, but he wasn’t about to keep it that way.

Tony Stark was seventeen when his first child was born, and that was just the beginning.

For Masterpost, AO3, and Fanfiction

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Big Buff Uncle, Part 2

“What is going on?” Loki snapped.

“The arc reactor has gone dead. The drain must have been too much for it,” Selvig said.

“No, the reactor was supposed to be the key.” Loki turned away from the man, staring out at the city. “Someone else is in the building,” he said after a short time. “Find them.”

“Yessir,” his men called out before marching away.

“You two,” he turned to a pair of scientists. “Get the reactor back on!”

They nodded and rushed off.

He grabbed one of the communication devices they used and marched down into the building. He came into the hall that looked out onto the balcony and held the bar. He started to pace, tapping the staff against the floor every so often.

The lights flickered on and he smirked. “Tell me what you’ve found!”

“Scout team one reporting in. Nothing on our levels.”

“Scout team two reporting in. Nothing on our levels.”

A few more teams sounded off until the man who had taken charge in Barton’s place gave the all clear.

“What about the scientists that were sent down to the reactor?” he asked, not having heard from them.

“They didn’t have comms, but my team checked the level personally and they’ve done their job.”

“Then -”

“Scout team ten reporting in, we’ve got -” the man cut off with a yell.

“Scout team ten, what’s your status?”

There was a moment of silence, then, “Scout team ten reporting in, false alarm.”

Loki rolled his eyes. “Selvig, the device?”

“Powering up as planned.”

“Good.” Loki turned and saw Iron Man approaching. He smirked. “Let the show begin.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I’m in range, sir.”

“Great. Mute comms.”

The comms muted just as F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s voice rang out. “Boss!”

“There’s my girl. Where are the others? And can one of you shut down the arc reactor?”

“The baby-bros are safely hidden. Star-Sis is currently engaged with one of the teams searching the building. Correction, she has just defeated them. She’s been systematically taking down all the invaders since Mini-Bro accidentally revealed there was someone in the building.”

“Is she okay?”

“She has taken no damage and her actions have gone unnoticed for now.”

Relieved Tony flew up so he was level with Selvig.

“Sir, the arc reactor has been switched to manual control, I can’t shut it down,” J.A.R.V.I.S. announced.

“Keep Nebula off the top floors,” he ordered before opening up the line. “Shut it down, Dr. Selvig.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Boss instructed me to keep you off the top floors.”

Nebula turned to see F.R.I.D.A.Y. draped over a holographic couch in the penthouse living room, watching the news.

“Outside communication’s working then?”

“Yup.”

“Are you going to stop me?”

The video changed to a soap opera. “Would you listen if I tried?”

Nebula smirked and continued up the stairs to the roof.

“I should probably warn you, it’s going to blow up in a few minutes.”

She turned to glare at her sister. “Why?”

A milkshake appeared in F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s hand and she drank it instead of answering.

Shaking her head, Nebula ran up the stairs. She looked over the roof and saw that the only things up there were a man half-unconscious on the ground and a device connected to the wormhole above the city that started to shake and spark as she watched.

She marched over to the man and picked him up. “Time to go.”

“The scepter… Loki’s scepter.”

“No idea what you’re talking about, nut job.”

“You need it to close the portal.”

“Doubt there’s going to be a portal in a few minutes when that device goes boom.”

Nebula was halfway down to the next level when the explosion knocked her off her feet.

Groaning, she picked herself up and then did the same for the man, carrying him down into the living room before laying him on the bar to check him over.

“You need to go,” F.R.I.D.A.Y. said, appearing at her side.

“Why?”

A smash had her turning to see a man lying on the balcony. A second later the Hulk jumped up to grab the man and smash through the windows into the living room.

Nebula drew her gun. “Please tell me the Hulk’s on our side.”

“He is.”

“Stay down,” she ordered, pointing her gun at the normal-looking man.

“Enough!” he shouted, getting to his feet. “You are, all of you are beneath me! I am a god -”

Nebula fired and the god was knocked backwards by the arc-powered blast. Then the Hulk had his hand around the man’s legs and repeatedly slammed him into the ground.

“Puny god,” the man scoffed once he’d finished. He turned to Nebula and she lowered the arc-gun with a nod.

“Pleasure to meet you. You’re cousin’s said great things. Please don’t let the aliens kill Mr. Stark.”

The Hulk narrowed his eyes and marched up to her. When she stood her ground, he pointed a finger into her face. “Like you.”

Then he was back out the window.

“Well that was terrifying,” F.R.I.D.A.Y. giggled before moving over to stand over the god. “Hello Mr. Loki. You are under arrest. Say, aren’t your eyes blue?”

He just whimpered.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y., don’t torture the prisoner.”

“I swear his eyes were blue in the pictures S.H.I.E.L.D. gave Boss.”

“Just go check on the idiots. I know they’re still in the building.”

F.R.I.D.A.Y. shrugged and disappeared.

Nebula marched up to the man and set her foot on his chest, pointing the arc-gun right in his face. “Stay down this time.”

His green eyes met her own and he nodded.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What was that explosion?” Captain America called out just as Natasha landed on the still smoking roof. “Was that you?”

“No, I don’t know what happened,” she answered, looking around.

“The device exploded,” Tony growled.

“Clearly,” she responded, raising an eyebrow at his angry tone as she searched the wreckage.

“Isn’t that a good thing?” The captain pointed out. “We didn’t exactly have a plan to get through the barrier.”

“Of course,” he said, his voice strained. “I’ll reward the ones who did it as soon as I’m done punishing them for messing with the reactor when they know they’re not allowed near it.”

“I have so many questions,” Clint said.

“Later, ” the captain said with a grunt. “Why’s the portal still open?”

“The tesseract absorbed some of the energy from the explosion,” a female voice said and Natasha drew her gun and spun around to see a young woman standing behind her.

“Who are you?” she said.

“Who was that?” Clint’s voice echoed her own.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y.,” the woman and Stark said together. The woman pointed down near her feet where the tesseract sat half-buried.

It was glowing much brighter than in any of the pictures or video she'd been shown and a trail of energy led up from it to the portal.

“The energy is allowing it to keep the portal open without the device, but it’s draining quickly. It should lose the connection soon and then the portal will close.”

“Great so we just need to keep this contained until then. After that it’s just cleanup. F.R.I.D.A.Y., be a dear and have Nebula grab something from the lab to contain the tesseract,” Stark said before giving a hiss.

“She’s currently restraining Loki, I can -”

“She’s WHAT!?” Stark shouted and Natasha’s eye twitched at the volume. “She shouldn’t be anywhere near him.”

“It’s alright. Jenny’s cousin gave him an up close meeting with the floor. He’s thoroughly knackered,” she snickered.

“Jenny?” the captain muttered.

“Knackered,” Clint added in a terrible Irish accent and F.R.I.D.A.Y. scowled.

“Seriously, Stark, who is this?” Natasha asked.

“Nevermind that. Fri, sweetie, how long do we have until the portal closes?”

“Sweetie? I thought his girl was called Pepper,” Clint muttered.

“I’m his daughter,” F.R.I.D.A.Y. said and Clint gave a choking sound. “I can’t be sure, there’s no tell- Wait!”

“Stark has a kid!?” Clint shouted as F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s eyes widened.

“Boss, no! It’s too dangerous!”

“What’s going on?” the captain asked.

“I got a nuke coming in, it's gonna blow in less than a minute. And I know just where to put it.”

“This is ridiculous! Bring the suit down! Big-Bro can pilot it!” F.R.I.D.A.Y. pleaded.

“No time. Besides, J.A.R.V.I.S. would lose contract the moment the suit’s through the portal.”

“Stark, you know that’s a one-way trip.”

“Jay, mute comms.”

Natasha turned when she heard footsteps and saw Parker had come onto the roof. “F.R.I.D.A.Y., get him out of there!”

“I can’t,” she whispered, staring off into the city.

Parker growled and pulled out her phone as it began ringing. “Don’t you - No! No, you can’t do - Please!” She fell to her knees and F.R.I.D.A.Y. knelt next to her, though she didn’t reach out. “I-I will, but you’re coming back! I’ll go out there and get you if I have to!”

Nebula saw F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s lips move, but she made no sound. She heard screams coming from the phone, though they didn’t sound like Stark.

Then the Iron Man suit shot passed them, flying up into the air and through the portal. Parker dropped her phone. “Please.”

The light connecting the tesseract to the portal flicked and thinned.

“Come on, Stark…” Natasha whispered as the portal began to shrink. The explosion went off, but Stark still hadn’t flow through.

“Boss, Dad, no,” F.R.I.D.A.Y. whimpered.

The portal shrank and shrank, until it closed.

Iron Man slipped through just before it could.

“He’s okay,” Parker’s voice said shakily before she grabbed her phone and put it to her ear. “He’s okay!”

“The suit's not responding,” F.R.I.D.A.Y. said, not sounding nearly as relieved. “Someone needs to catch him! The systems must still be rebooting!”

“Thor!” the captain shouted, but then Hulk was flying through the air to catch Stark, tearing into a building to slow their fall.

“I-I need to go,” Parker said, getting to her feet. “The prisoner’s downstairs. Should probably check on him.”

Natasha nodded and turned to F.R.I.D.A.Y., only for her to be nowhere in sight. She frowned, but turned back to where she’d seen Hulk and Stark land. “How is he?”

There was a moment of silence, then the captain reported in. “He’s alright, making jokes and everything. We’re headed your way.”

“Roger that, meet you there,” Clint agreed.

Natasha sighed then let her feet carry her to the stairs and down them. When she reached what appeared to be a living area, it was to see Loki sitting on the ground in a him-sized hole alongside Parker, both nursing glasses of amber liquid.

“Are you old enough to drink?” Natasha asked and the girl flipped her off before downing the rest of the liquid.

When she turned her focus on Loki, he ignored her.

Parker stood up and poured herself another glass before offering some to Natasha.

“I’d prefer Vodka.”

She nodded and grabbed a bottle off the shelf, handing it to Natasha as she passed on her way back to Loki’s side.

“Who’s this?” Clint asked, coming up beside her shortly later. “Why’s she buddy-buddy with him?”

“We’re drinking to his defeat,” Parker muttered.

“She works for Stark,” Natasha explained, handing him her bottle so he could have some.

“What’s going on here?” Stark said, coming into the room. “Why is everyone drinking my alcohol? I’m not even allowed to drink my alcohol unless it’s a special occasion!”

“I’d say you nearly dying should count as a special occasion, but you do it way too often,” Parker snapped.

Stark pointed at her. “You are not allowed to drink. Besides the fact you’re underage, you’re also on the job.”

“I’m taking vacation time.”

“Don’t you have two scientists to round up before they decide to blow something else up?”

Parker stood up and walked over to him. She looked him in the eye and downed her glass before shoving it into his hand. “Vacation. Time. I’ll be back in a week. Two. I’ll be in Hawaii. Don’t call me.”

She marched out without a second glance.

“Fri, make sure she has everything she needs,” Stark sighed.

“Got it, Boss!”

Natasha and Clint spun around to see F.R.I.D.A.Y. standing directly behind them. Clint, reacting on instinct, sunk his hand into her stomach.

Emphasis on into as his hand seemed to pass right through her.

F.R.I.D.A.Y. groaned, doubling over. “Ow! Oh, that hurt!”

“Stop teasing the super spies,” Stark snorted. “Go track down those two idiots and make sure they’re somewhere safe. And by that, I mean far away from the reactor.”

“Aye aye,” F.R.I.D.A.Y. said, straightening up and saluting her father before vanishing.

“What on earth?” the captain wondered, looking around.

“She was an illusion, obviously,” Loki scoffed.

“Hologram, but close enough.” Stark pointed at him. “Now shut up and stop drinking my alcohol.”

“You offered me a drink,” the villain said before taking another sip.

Stark shrugged. “Fair enough.”

The captain gave them both an unbelieving expression.

“Midgardian alcohol is weak, by the way,” Loki sniffed.

“He’s got a point,” Thor agreed quietly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“But I was supposed to stay with you for the whole week,” Harley whined as he packed his bag.

“Should have thought of that before you decided to play demolition expert with my prototype arc reactor,” Tony snorted. “Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if your mother never lets me see you again.”

“She wouldn’t do that, would she?” Peter asked. “It’s not your fault the aliens attacked here!”

“I should have gotten you kids out of the city as soon as I knew it was in danger.”

“But then you couldn’t have fought the aliens,” Harley said, sitting down on his bag so he could zip it closed easier.

“You kids are my priority, not aliens.”

“But we were fine! Nebula said the reactor room is like a bunker! Nothing could have gotten in as soon as we sealed the door,” Peter objected.

“You mean the reactor room with the dangerous prototype you two aren’t supposed to be anywhere near?” Tony asked, crossing his arms.

“We closed the wormhole!” Harley huffed.

“That was some good thinking, but you should have told Nebula your plan and let her take care of it instead. You guys are ten! You need to leave these kinds of situations to the adults.” He set one hand on Harley’s shoulder and the other on Peter’s head. “Please, you kids and your siblings are the most important things in my life. If something were to happen to any of you… I need to know you guys are safe. If I’m worried you’re getting yourselves into trouble then I can’t focus on doing my job, alright?”

“Okay, Dad,” Peter said.

“Yeah, alright,” Harley agreed.

“Thank you.” He pressed a kiss to both of their foreheads, which made Harley squirm away with a groan.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce hadn’t honestly believed Tony was being serious when he’d offered to let him stay at the Tower, and yet here he was in a temporary lab the man had set up for him while construction on Stark Tower finished.

A temporary lab that was still more advanced than any other he’d worked in.

“Look at you stepping up in the world.”

Bruce turned to the door with wide eyes. “Jen? What are you doing here?”

“Stark flew me out. Practically forced me to come. He seems to think we need to talk.”

He flinched. “I’m sorry about that. I’ll talk to him. If you want to leave y-“

“Bruce,” she said, holding up her hand. “I wasn’t the one that ran off after the transfusion.”

“I figured you’d never want to see me again,” Bruce mumbled.

She came up to him and took his hand. “You saved my life. Of course I wanted to see you again. I’ll admit, it was a bit scary at first, but I’m handling it, same as you. If anything, it might have done me some good. Stark seems to think I needed the, in his words, backbone upgrade.”

He chuckled.

Giving him a wry smile, she continued, “Of course, it might have been easier if you didn’t take off without a word. I get it, though. You thought you had ruined my life. And if you’d stayed, Ross might have tracked you down again. You could have at least said goodbye.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I know.” She pulled him into a hug. “But if you ever do it again, I’ll kick your butt. I will. I might not be as strong as you, but I’m way smarter.”

“Sure,” he chuckled and she pulled back to glare.

There was a shuffling sound in the doorway and they both turned to see a kid staring at them with wide eyes.

“Oops!” Jen said, blushing. “I forgot, sorry.” She came up to the kid’s side and set her hand on his shoulder. “Bruce, this is Peter. He’s the son of a client. His family’s in town so I offered to bring him over.” She gave a wink. “He’s a big fan.”

He gave an uneasy smile as the two approached. He’d seen some of the people talking (“fanning”) about the Hulk online. Usually it was young kids who liked the destruction he caused (he chose to ignore the other fans). “Hey.”

The kid was still staring up at him with those big doe eyes. “Y-you’re -”

“The Hu-”

“BRUCE BANNER!”

Bruce blinked and looked up at Jen, who was smirking.

That was not what he expected.

“I’ve read all your papers! Your work is so cool!”

That was really not what he was expecting.

“You… read my papers? Could you even understand any of them?”

That came off more condescending than he intended and he flinched. Then he flinched again at the look Jen shot him.

Peter didn’t notice as he’d ducked his head. “Some of it,” he said, blushing.

As if he should be embarrassed at being able to only understand some of what Bruce talked about in his pages at such a young age.

“Kid you’re… How old are you?”

“Ten,” he said, then tacked on, “But I’ll be eleven in August!”

“You’re ten! And you still managed to get through my papers! You must be really smart.”

Peter beamed.

“I’ll just leave you two to your science,” Jen chuckled, moving over to a table in the corner and pulling out a tablet.

“So what fields of science are you interested in?”

“A bunch! Physics, engineering, biology, chemistry is my favorite, especially biochemistry, but don’t tell Dad because he says we’re an engineering family.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So 12 has been revealed as... Kid Loki! It's actually kind of hilarious that it got found out just before this chapter, all things considered. Keep guessing for 8 and 9.

To respond to a few incorrect guesses that have come up a lot (meant to do this last chapter but forgot):

Ultron also isn't a kid because F that guy. I have more reasons, but that's the main one and the rest will come up later on.

Riri is not one of the kids, unfortunately I just don't know all that much about her. Her story or her characterization. However, while researching Viv, I did find out that apparently she has a crush on Riri and kissed her in the comics, so I might look into introducing Riri when Viv's time to shine comes along. She still wouldn't be Tony's kid, though, and she also wouldn't be Ironheart until after Endgame's over at the very earliest because I've already got too many Iron Men flying around in this AU as is (even if you don't count Vision, Vivian, Iron Spider, and Nebula's repulsor cybernetics) so I wanna wait until a few have left before bringing in more. If it does happen though, it will likely be closer to Far From Home since she (as well as a few other characters I've been thinking of bringing in like Miles Morales, Kamala Khan, and maybe Gwen Stacy) could fit into the plot line I have planned for that arc.

[dan-vaverick]

Through the Sound Proof Glass (A Loud House Fanfiction) Chapter One

A Voice Reborn

"Catch you dudes later!" Luna exclaimed, waving back to her friends.

She grabbed her guitar from her locker and made her way to the music department of the school. Nothing like jamming on some sweet tunes after a long boring day of school. She was about halfway passed the choir room and halted to muffled keys hitting the piano followed by vocals just behind the doors. She peeked through the door's slim glass window to see who was inside.

Sitting at the grand piano and tapping at the keys was Jamie. A few inches shorter than her, he wore a grey hoodie with a white t-shirt underneath, navy jeans and black sneakers. His hair was slightly tall and curly in a light brown shade. Over his eyes were a pair of dark orange glasses with light blue lenses. Luna knew him from their music class last semester. Most of the students who took music knew that he was exceptional at playing the piano. In fact, most of the music he played for everyone were covers of rock songs despite the teacher's more sophisticated taste in music. Luna admired that. She was good playing the keyboard, but she had to admit, she wasn't as good as him. She kept spying through the glass. He tapped the keys while his upper body shifted back and forth as if a demon of rock possessed him. He was playing with a deep passion.

Her eyes squinted. Hold on. Were his lips moving? Luna raised her brows with intrigue. Could he sing too? She reached for the knob and turned it carefully. She bit her lip, closed her eyes tight, and prayed that the door wouldn't make a sound. Once it was turned all the way, she pushed the door inward. Even a tiny crack of the door let out a blast of music in Luna's face. She slipped herself in, undetected by the high volume in the room. She hid behind the choir stands and watched Jamie. Inside, she recognized what he was playing. An old classic and one of her personal favorites; Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody. He had his laptop on top of the piano, hooked to the main speakers of the room to play along.

Jamie softly hit the keys to the next part of the piano solo. His lips moved as the late Freddie Mercury's voice echoed from the speakers.

Luna sighed. I guess he's just lip-synching. She thought.

Next to his laptop was a microphone sitting in front of him. He was most likely pretending to sing into it. But looking at Jamie, Luna noticed the voice matched him perfectly, as if he was singing exactly like Freddie. But what were the chances of that happening?

Too late, my time has come...

Sends shivers down my spine…

Body's aching all the time…

Goodbye everybody, I've got to go…

Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth…

The legendary voice swooned many people, including Luna herself. She too felt herself lost in the song. Her hips swayed back and forth to Roger Taylor's steady beats on the drums and cymbals. Then came her favorite part. She took her hands and air guitared to Brain May's solo. He was one of her role models when it came to playing the guitar along with Slash and Eddie Van Halen. In her spare time, she would practice the solo in the garage. She struck the imaginary strings with a passion, imagining herself performing the solo on stage in front of a roaring crowd.

Then came the upcoming climax of the composition with the start of the piano, Jamie repeated hitting two keys just before he started to lip-synch again.

I see a little silhouetto of a man.

Scaramouche, scaramouche, will you do the fandango?

Thunderbolts and lightning, very very frightening me!

The suspenseful operatic section drew Luna in. She wanted to join the fun. She approached Jamie from behind stealthily. In her luck, her footsteps were drowned out by the track. She ceased her steps just one foot away from him. He continued to hit the keys with the beat as Luna kept air guitaring. She joined in, lip-synching for the background vocals.

Easy come, easy go. Will you let me go?

Bismillah! No! We will not let you go! (Let him go!)

Bismillah! We will not let you go! (Let him go!)

Bismillah! We will not let you go! (Let me go!)

It was coming. The coup de gras of the composition. The flames of rock lit within the two, playing with a burning passion. Luna raised her arms high and rocked her head forward. She joined Jamie in the song's climax as he pounded the keys to follow.

Oh mama mia, mama mia!

Mama mia, let me go!

Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me!

For me!

FOR ME!

To the last verse, Luna let her voice out, singing in a great falsetto with the background vocals.

A sudden chill ran up Jamie's spine as he heard a voice behind him. The burning passion became a frozen pick and struck him still. His piano playing and lip-synching came to an abrupt halt. The song went to it's jamming of the guitars and drums just as he turned around to find Luna behind him, whipping her hair. He let out a girlish yelp and jumped. Along with the bench, he fell on his back.

Luna heard a loud thud and stopped whipping her head. She gasped as she looked down to Jamie, staring up at her with startled eyes and panting heavily. "You okay, dude?!" she shouted over the music.

"W-what are you doing in here?!" he exclaimed.

"Just rockin' your jam session, bro!" She chuckled. She offered a hand.

Jamie went to reach for it, but his ears caught the song already to the point where the next verse should've been sung. Mercury's voice wasn't there. Looking at Luna, she noticed it also.

"Crap!" He bolted up from the floor and reached for his laptop, tripping on the bench and landed his chest on the piano keys. Music notes rang out of proportion. A finger pressed the touchpad and paused the video, silencing the room. He closed his laptop and sighed with exhaustion.

Luna tilted her head with puzzled eyes. "Hold on. Was that an instrumental?" she asked, pointing to his laptop.

Jamie's eyes widened as he stood up in front of his laptop. A wide and awkward smile grew on his face while a drop of sweat rolled down his cheek. "Uh, no! W-what makes you think that...?" He squeezed his hands tight behind his back, almost twisting his fingers off. Luna peeked over to his computer, but he leaned in to block it from her view.

She crossed her arms. "I've been rocking to that song since I was seven. I know an instrumental when I hear one."

More sweat rolled down Jamie's face. "Don't know what you're talking about…"

Luna raised a brow and smirked. "C'mon, Jamie. You can't lie to me."

"I'm not lying!"

"Dude, you got a smile so big, it's about to tear your face in half."

At that point, the bottom half of his face was straining to keep the smile up. His heart was about to burst from his chest. He was losing the fight, but he was determined to win the war.

"T-this is my normal smile." he replied. "Nothing happening here, so there's no need for you stay here any longer."

A more devious smirk grew on Luna's face. So that's how he wants to play it, huh? She thought. She reached for the knocked down bench and put it back up on its legs. She took a seat and crossed her arms, staring up at Jamie smugly.

"Sorry, brah. I ain't going nowhere. I'll stay as long as I want until you talk."

His smile finally broke and slumped over. His cheeks puffed. He let out a heavy sigh and opened his laptop. Luna looked over her shoulder to a YouTube video titled Bohemian Rhapsody (Instrumental). Jamie looked away, crossing his arms with a huff. He glanced back at Luna, who gestured him to sit next to her. He hesitated, but sat down anyways. His eyes faced the floor, fidgeting his thumbs. A silence filled the void between the two. He didn't know what to say next. Maybe she didn't either.

Luna took a deep breath, breaking the silence. "I just got one thing to ask."

The lack of emotion in her voice made him tremble, almost afraid to hear her question. He gulped nervously, unable to look at her. "And what's that…?" He suddenly felt his upper arms grabbed and pulled towards her. He was now faced with a pair of widened eyes and a big smile surrounded by freckles.

"Why didn't you say you could sing?!" she squealed excitedly, shaking him back and forth.

Once she stopped, Jamie composed himself, brushing off his arms. He took another look at her: did her eyes just get brighter? She held her hands up to her chest. She was jumping up and down in her seat. Jeez, it was like looking at a giddy schoolgirl. He cleared his throat. "I uh… I never bothered to..." he replied.

Her jaw dropped. "What?! Dude! Why would you hide such an amazing talent like this?! Do you realize how great it would be if you were to sing that well in front of people?!"

Jamie blushed and scratched the back of his head. "I don't think I want to even try…"

A small frown took over Luna's smile. "What's the matter with you? Did you suddenly get stage fright? You seem pretty confident playing the piano in front of the class last semester."

"I don't get stage fright." Jamie replied. "Look, playing the piano in front of people is no problem. I love entertaining people! But singing, it kinda goes deeper than that. Puberty kinda hit my voice pretty hard."

Luna winced slightly taking in a sharp inhale. "Did you voice crack a lot…?"

He nodded. "Before then, I could sing very well without any problems. But when my voice started cracking, a lot of people laughed at how I sounded. So I didn't want to imagine what they would think if I tried singing. It doesn't crack anymore, and I can sing much better than I did. Don't get me wrong, I love to sing, but I'd rather do it when no one's around."

Luna slowly wrapped an arm around his shoulders. "Sorry, brah… I didn't know it was like that."

"Thanks. It kinda helped talking about it."

She smiled and stood up from her seat. "I'm always around if you need someone to talk to or play music with." She winked. "Oh, and sorry for scaring you earlier. I... never pass up a chance to listen to some Queen when it's convenient."

Jamie chuckled. "Who doesn't?"

"You know, you almost had me fooled." she said, grinning. "I thought you were just playing and lip-synching to the song."

"Sorry about that." He laughed.

"No no! Don't be sorry! I think it's great that you can sing so well! It's just... for a minute there, I could've sworn your singing sounded exactly like-"

The thought hit her hard like a wrecking ball to the face. Her eyes widened and her jaw dropped once again, letting out a quiet long lasting gasp. She didn't have a reaction like that since she saw Mick Swagger at the Family Fun Fair last summer under his disguise.

Aaand now she knows the other thing… Jamie thought. He bit his lip with a shy smile, snickering at Luna's expression.

"You can sing like Freddie Mercury?!" Her voice echoing in the room. Luckily no one else heard it.

Jamie shrugged his head at her sudden use of her loud voice, rubbing his right upper arm. "M-maybe…?"

She was left dumbstruck to his response. "Maybe?! Maybe?!"

"W-what more do you want me to say…?!"

Luna remained speechless. Such a discovery would've left anyone in awe. But was it true? An occurrence like that was very rare. She needed to know. She was determined to find out. She wiped her stunned expression off from her face and cleared her throat.

"Sing."

A veil of confusion covered his face. "W-what?"

"I want you to sing. We need to find out right now." She was never more serious in her life. And her eyes were damn scary when she was serious. "Play and sing the last five verses of Bohemian Rhapsody."

Jamie's heart skipped a beat upon her request. He fidgeted with his fingers and looked away.

"I-I don't know if I can…" he whispered.

Luna sighed. "Come on, dude. This is big! If everyone knew you can sing like that, they would be blown away! No one would dare to laugh at you!" She saw doubt eating at his face. Perhaps a more gentle approach would get through to him. She took a knee before him. "Jamie, imagine this as the first step of getting over your fear of singing in front of others. Let me be the first step." Her voice was soft and nurturing. She cupped his hands into hers. "Will you sing for me? Please?"

Jamie eyes met with hers. Deep down, he could see his reflection in her dark brown irises. He saw himself trapped in a bubble of self-discontent. He wanted to sing, but his experience from puberty kept him from that. But then again, he saw himself in Luna's eyes. A girl who was all about expressing herself through music. He had seen her perform. Such confidence and passion. Nothing stopped her from doing what she loved. He used the piano to show his passion. Perhaps it was time to let his voice express it even further.

He took a deep breath, and returned the smile. "Okay. I'll sing."

"Attaboy, luv!" Luna replied, using her British accent.

Jamie turned around to face the piano keys. He reached to open his laptop, but Luna's hand covered it.

"Without the instrumental." she implied. This made Jamie swallow spit nervously. "Let the pianist within you finish the song. I take it you practiced it enough to remember?" He nodded. "If it'll help. I'll play the song with you too. Wait here."

She jogged off to the back of the choir stands and grabbed her guitar. She quickly set it up, plugging it into the closest amp she could find. She turned it on, strumming a few practice chords and a short solo. Jamie tapped on the microphone in front of him, hearing the echoed taps from the other speakers. Everything was in working order.

"Alright. I'm gonna pick it up right after the rock interlude and go into the ritardando and then the outro. Got it?"

Jamie nodded and took a deep breath. His fingers ready. It was the moment of truth.

"One, two! One, two, three, four!"

Luna took her pick and struck three ascending guitar runs. Jamie followed up with his right thumb and ring finger jumping around the keys, playing b-flats to the build up of the outro. Luna lent her voice to the next vocal section before Jamie would get to his.

Ooooooh!

Ooh yeah, ooh yeah!

Luna continued with a soft guitar melody while Jamie played gentle keys to his finale. A tightness grew in his chest, but he intended to push it out. His unique voice filled the room.

Nothing really matters

Anyone can see

Nothing really matters

Nothing really matters… to me

Jamie ended the vocals with a soft and fading vibrato. He concluded the song with softer taps on the keys with Luna strumming one last melody just before he sang out the last verse.

Any way the wind blows…

He struck one final chord, imagining a gong ringing in the background.

The room grew silent. There was a slight discomfort in Jamie's chest, but it was lighter than how it felt a minute ago. He stared down at the keys, exhaling softly. He did it. He sang in front of a person after a long while of vocal solitude. He licked his bottom lip, wondering what Luna's response would be now that she heard him.

"So Luna… how did I do?" He turned to her and let out a soft gasp.

Luna's eyes were flooding with tears. They ran down her cheeks mixed with her mascara. Her hands covered her mouth, but were too small to cover a smile so big, it looked like it hurt trying to keep it on. All that could be heard from her were soft whimpers and sniffles.

"Luna…?"

Out of nowhere, she let out a high-pitched squeal that echoed throughout the room. Jamie jumped in the bench with the crap scared out of him. Forget the schoolgirl remark. At that point, Luna was jumping and acting like a crazed fangirl. But based on her reaction, she loved every second of his performance. Jamie's cheeks turned red and he averted his eyes. Once the room was silent again, he looked back at her. She wiped her eyes clean, but her cheeks were left with faint smear marks of her mascara.

"Dude! Do you know what this means?!" She just locked eyes with him, her hands hanging out and trembling. "You can become the next Freddie Mercury!" She let out another loud but softer squeal. "We gotta tell everybody!"

Jamie bit his lip hard and shook his head fast.

"Oh no!" Jamie replied, gesturing the same answer with his hands. "Just because I sang to you, doesn't mean I'm ready to sing in front of everyone! I need time to adjust!"

Luna let out a disappointed groan. "Sorry, man! I'm just super-hyped about this! Think about it! With your voice, you'll be famous! Hell, you could be Queen's new frontman! You already play the piano, so it's like you're Freddie's reincarnation! Adam Lambert's got nothin' on you!"

Jamie smirked with a chuckle to follow up. "I know you're excited. I am too. But this is just a lot to take in right now. And I need to take it slow if I want to get over this anxiety. So now that I sang to you with no problems, what would be the next step?"

"The next step is to sing in front of a few more people." Luna replied. "We'll just keep adding more and more at a time until we get you to sing in front of maybe... a rock concert's worth of people. Is that a reasonable goal?"

Jamie looked down, pondering Luna's suggestion. She was no psychologist, but she certainly took the role as one for him, figuring out a treatment for his illness. He spent a minute before making a decision.

"Before I reply, let me ask you a question."

"Shoot." she said.

"Why are you doing this? Why are you putting so much effort into helping me?"

Luna grew a gentle smile. She put down her guitar and took a seat next to him.

"Because I know talent when I see it. You're so talented on the piano, and you're even more talented with that voice! But it bothers me to see you let that talent go to waste if you don't share it. Music means everything to me, and I can see that it means a lot to you too. I want to help you reach to your full potential as I let others did for me. And since we barely know each other, I'd like us to be friends."

Jamie returned the oral gesture. "I'd like that too. In that case, I should properly introduce myself." He offered a hand. "Jamie Maverick."

Luna chuckled and shook his hand. "Luna Loud, a pleasure ta meet ya, mate." she replied in a British accent. They exchanged quiet chuckles. "So... does that mean you're up to the challenge?"

He nodded. "I'm in."

"Great! Because I've got the perfect audience for the next step. Will twelve people be okay?."

"Sounds like a lot, but I'm up for it."

Luna smiled back and gave him a firm pat on his shoulder. "Perfect! If you're available, come to my place after school tomorrow and I'll have your audience put together." She tore a piece of paper and scribbled on it, handing it to Jamie. "Here's my address and my number." She put her guitar back in her case and made her way to the door. "I'm looking forward to our next jamming session, Jamie! Stay cool!"

With one door shut, she was gone. Jamie followed her example and slipped his laptop into his backpack. Throwing it over his shoulder, he looked down at the piece of paper one last time before slipping it into his pocket:

1216 Franklin Ave. Royal Woods, MI

(XXX) XXX-XXXX

[bastardtravel]

August 11, 2018. Manchester, New Hampshire.

After seven hours on the road, pausing only to explore an Old Ones cult site, storm a terrible castle, and eat distressingly dry corned beef at a Greek diner that still advertised one of their menu items as “Michael Jackson’s favorite grinder”, we were in dire need of respite.

Establishing a forward operating base was our first priority. For my part, I can sleep anywhere. My bonfire days in the Frozen North frequently necessitated pitching a $10 K-Mart tent over gravel, then drinking bottom-shelf whiskey until you didn’t realize you were sleeping in a puddle of rainwater and broken glass. That’s not a knack you lose. It’s like riding a bike. The Girl was always more discerning, and became doubly so after our experience in Phoenix with the inept criminal front halfway house hotel. We agreed that she can veto any of the lodgings I book. Sometimes, late at night, I’ll hold a flashlight under my chin and tell her spoOoOoky stories about hostels in Ireland.

She insisted on the airport Super 8. I was hoping to stay in a quaint deep woods motel called “Unsmiling Jed’s Sleepaway”, attached to sister business “Unsmiling Jed’s Discount Plastic Surgery Silo and Chili Kitchen”.

If I can’t protect it, I don’t deserve to have it. That goes double for life.

A friendly foreign woman checked us in at the Super 8, then proceeded into utter bafflement when I asked for a first aid kid. I chewed myself up pretty good climbing Bancroft’s Castle, and I’d spent the last half hour bleeding into an oily dog blanket to avoid ruining my upholstery. I’m pretty sure that’s how plagues start.

There were no band-aids here, or antiseptics, or possibly medicine as a concept. There was a three gallon tub of hand sanitizer. I thanked her for the offer but gently declined.

We went up to the third floor. The hallways were lined with people sitting on the carpet outside their rooms, shouting and smoking cigarettes. The room itself was clean and the air conditioning worked. All my boxes were checked. The bathroom reeked of weed, which some would interpret as a bonus. I scrubbed my wounds raw in the sink, tucked away the precious cargo of wine and peaches, and set out to investigate downtown Manchester.

Streetlight technology has not yet made its way to Manchester, so we spent twenty minutes missing exits in ocean-floor darkness. It looked worryingly like Wilkes-Barre, which is not where one would choose to vacation, were one sane.

Downtown erupted from nowhere like graphic pop-in on a video game running at its lowest resolution. One second you’re in leatherface country, with nothing breaking the abyssal darkness but the occasional half-broken Jiffy Lube sign. The next, you’re on vibrant neon market strip, replete with hipsters and the homeless.

We knew we had hit downtown proper when we passed by the “craft grilled cheese bistro”.

only programmers will understand!!!! like and reblog if u get it

Since I am an adult man, grilled cheese cannot be dinner. Both “gastropubs” we tried, despite their bitchin Greek mythology names, offered generic terrible burgers and a draft list that consisted of Coors Light.

“I’m so hungry,” the Girl told me. “I’m gonna die.”

“We all will,” I assured her. “Soon.”

Yelp claimed there was a brewery five blocks away. We walked off the only lit street, into absolute, encompassing blackness. It would’ve been spooky if I didn’t always kind of hope some Putty Patrol mook would lunge at me from the dark while I’m far away from home, having told no one where I’m going and left no paper trail.

There were no incidents. No one was murdered in self-defense. No one knows what we did last summer. The Stark Brewing Company was in the basement of a grim looking office complex, and it was vacant save for two other wanderers.

We sat at the bar and ordered a flight and an imperial stout. I was pushing for finding an actual restaurant, but the Girl ordered “Penne with vodka sauce”, which was not the right color, flavor, or texture to be anything but penne bolognese. The Girl didn’t seem to mind. I ate a pulled pork sandwich.

The beers were warm, but I didn’t care. It didn’t matter what the beers were, so long as they were beers. And not Coors Light. The brewery themed all of their beers off of dogs, for some reason, which I believe to be the ideal business model. According to the bartenders, the brewery had been open for 25 years, but hadn’t yet received their big boom. I was outraged. The beers were excellent, and would probably be even better if they weren’t room temperature, and the taps were not only named for specific dogs, but also provided pictures.

To say nothing of the bathroom, which was covered in sharpie beer lore.

The bartender and waitresses swore a lot more than you would normally expect in this context. The Girl maintains they were swearing at us. I disagreed.

“They were swearing <i>with</i> us,” I mansplained.

“We weren’t swearing,” she countered.

“But if we HAD been.”

As I’ve grown larger and more sinuous, I’ve tried to cut back on how often I cuss at strangers. Cultural relativism is the understanding that not everyone grew up among the coalcrackers, and good-natured oaths like “how the hell are you” or using the fuck-word as a conversational placeholder, while subjectively soothing, can set off fight-or-flight in the small, soft, and bourgeoisie.

I try to maintain direct proportionality between my barbarism and my well-heeledness. Neither the wait staff nor the other two customers shared my bond, and the middle-aged guy on my right proceeded to tell me how his hometown of Denver, Colorado is the greatest fuckin’ city in America, next to maybe Southern California. Which is not a city.

We talked about our homes and travels for a while, then I got my pulled pork sandwich and they left. The sandwich was slightly warmer than the beer, which beat the alternative.

An armada of children came into the bar.

“Oh, shit,” the woman tending bar said. They were visibly teenagers, and on the wrong side of it. They had that gangly awkwardness you get around fourteen or fifteen, and if they were trying to play it off, they were woefully bad at it. There were also nearly twenty of them. It looked like a field trip.

People in their twenties don’t travel in packs of more than six. It’s hard to transport a throng, unless you have a party bus, and why do you have a party bus when you’re twenty-eight? You’re twenty-eight and party buses have always been sad. Get a job. Also, it’s hard to get that many adults to agree on something.

It can be done. You can say, “Hey, adults, you want to do some drugs?” And in a sufficiently sized crowd, you’ll manage to pull twenty or so who will follow you to your house or whatever. This is called an “afterparty”. It doesn’t go to bars at 9pm.

Have you felt out the social zeitgeist recently? Look at a random handful of current memes and it’ll be pretty clear that most adults consider socialization to be a required burden, like paying emotional taxes. “Going out” is the price of living in a civilized society. You’re not going to scare up twenty people, then put them in a party bus, then take them to an abandoned bar half a mile outside of where the actual nightlife is.

“Hey, we’re just about to close,” the bartender said.

A reedy blonde in a top that seemed to consist mostly of straps screeched, “But your WEBSITE said you were open til ONE!”

Screeched.

The bar fell silent. Well, more silent. The Girl and I traded looks, her horror for my delight.

“Uhhhhhh,” the bartender said, but with excellent elocution, as though that were the word she had deliberately chosen. “Okay.”

They sat the itinerant mall food court in an enormous corner table, whereupon they requested shots.

The waitress who had sworn at/with us the least came back to the bar and said, “You guys said you were from Pennsylvania, right?”

We nodded.

“Can I see one of your licenses quick?”

She compared mine against the obviously fake ID one of the tweens had given her. After a moment she said, “Yeah, you can see, the font is different. And the picture looks like it’s photoshopped.”

“Yeah, no one’s license picture ever looks this good,” the Girl said, studying the fake ID.

“Except mine,” I added. They ignored me. I didn’t take it personally.

The waitresses disappeared into the back. Five minutes later, the only dude working at the place was gendered into being the bad cop. He sulked over to the teens.

“You guys gotta leave,” he said. “We know your ID’s fake. We’re not trying to get fined. You gotta go.”

For maximum accuracy, imagine this said in Toby’s voice from the Office. Shamefaced, the flash mob of children dispersed.

We paid for our room temperature beers and left the poor, foul-mouthed brewery to close at 9:30 on a Friday. The Girl and I accidentally stalked the battalion of teens through the street, but only because we were all moving back toward the only lights in the city, not unlike moths. They turned a corner and vanished, presumably to find an arcade or laser tag or some sort of large carousel.

The Girl and I followed the sounds of some obnoxious bros announcing, “It’s like a fahkin sketchy ally, dewd”.

It was, in fact, the least sketchy alley I’d ever been in. Cat Alley was the best lit venue in all of New Hampshire. It was clean and well-maintained, and it was covered less in graffiti and more in an outdoor art gallery dedicated to cats.

There were more, but they didn’t all warrant a picture.

Portland Pie Co loomed from the endless darkness like a beacon in the night, hearkening back to those days lost in Maine during the Great Lobster Drought of 2017. We split a bourbon barrel ale which did me in. It was bedtime.

On the way back, toward the end of the main drag, a man made of pure light rode by blasting EZ-Listenin from his Tron bicycle, also made of pure light.

I can’t prove he wasn’t Jesus.

Heartened, we returned to the hotel, where no one was smoking or yelling in the hallway anymore. Excellent.

Next stop, Portsmouth.

Love,

The Bastard

Into the Abyss August 11, 2018. Manchester, New Hampshire. After seven hours on the road, pausing only to explore an Old Ones cult site, storm a terrible castle, and eat distressingly dry corned beef at a Greek diner that still advertised one of their menu items as "Michael Jackson's favorite grinder", we were in dire need of respite.

[megsblackfirewrites]

My Golden Obsession: Chapter 13

Chapter 13

“UNCLE JACK!”

“Hana-bunny,” Jack laughed as he scooped his niece up and spun her around over his head. “You’ve gotten so big! Are you eating all of your green vegetables like a good bunny?”

“Yes!” she laughed and reached her arms out to hug him. “I missed you!”

“It’s all she’s been talking about for weeks,” Jazz laughed as she kissed his cheek. “It’s great to see you, Jack. You look great.”

“Thanks, Jazz,” Jack smiled. “I’m glad you’re doing great out in Indiana.”

“Just as many gigs out there as there are in L.A if you know what to look for,” Jazz smiled. “And you look great, baby bro. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so filled out.”

“Well, I’ve got someone watching out for me,” Jack said as he set Hana on his hip. “Does my bunny want some carrot sticks?”

“Yes!” Hana grinned up at him. “I love carrots!”

Jack carried Hana into the kitchen and set her on the counter. He retrieved his container of premade vegetable sticks from the fridge and set it down between him and Hana. He knew that Hana adored her vegetables; a little strange for someone her age, but he knew Jazz wasn’t complaining; so he had cut a lot of fresh veggies to meet the demands of a growing kid. They solemnly tapped their carrot sticks together before biting into them with relish. Hana giggled as Jack’s big teeth chomped through the carrot with ease, covering her mouth as Jack wiggled his nose like a rabbit.

“You should have adopted,” Jazz teased as she brought hers and Hana’s luggage into the house. “You’re so great with kids.”

“My schedule wouldn’t have been good for a kid,” Jack smiled sadly. “And I have Hana-bunny for all of that.”

“You had Hana-bunny,” Jazz corrected as she picked up a piece of celery and chewed on it. “Now you’re halfway across the country. We only ever see you in video calls.” She smirked. “If you are decent, anyways.”

Jack stuck his tongue out at his sister as she headed upstairs to the spare bedroom. He was always decent; it was just whether or not he was covered in hickies across his chest and shoulders that determined if he was going to go on video chat with his sister and her kid. He did not want to have to explain why he was covered in bruises that looked like teeth marks to his young niece. He looked back at Hana and smiled, kissing her forehead.

“Have you been having fun at school, Bunny?” he asked.

Hana nodded happily. “I love math! The teacher says that it’s natural for me; what does that mean? Mommy gets mad when I say that,” she asked.

Jack sighed heavily. “Well, Hana, you know how Mommy picked you up at the airport when you were a baby?” he asked. She nodded. “Well, a lot of people say that the people from where you were born are inherently good at math.”

“Inherently?” she frowned.

“Naturally, sorry, honey,” Jack smiled. “I forget sometimes that you don’t know the same big words that I do. You’re such a smart girl, though. I know you’ll be baffling me soon enough with your list of big words.”

Hana smiled and stuffed another piece of carrot into her mouth. Jazz walked back into the kitchen just as the door to the house opened. Jazz looked over curiously and tensed, her eyes going big.

“Oh,” she said as Gabriel pulled his beanie off of his head and ruffled his curls. “Jack…damn.”

Jack grinned at his sister before he walked over to his boyfriend and kissed his cheek. “Hey, sweetheart,” he greeted. “Come meet the family.”

“Well, this is clearly your sister,” Gabriel smiled as he held his hand out. “Jasmine, correct?”

“Yes,” she said with a faint blush on her face. “But everyone calls me ‘Jazz’.”

Gabriel nodded his head as he shook her hand. “And this must be little Hana-Bunny.”

“Yes!” Hana grinned at him. “You’re really tall! Even taller than Grandpa!”

“Dad’s 6’1’’,” Jack chuckled.

“Ah,” Gabriel chuckled as he walked forward. “You aren’t scared, Bunny?”

Hana shook her head. “No! I think you look cool! You look like Matt from my class! He’s dark skinned too!” she grinned happily.

Gabriel chuckled as he leaned on the counter beside her. “I’m glad you aren’t afraid of me, Bunny. A lot of kids find me scary,” he said.

Hana shook her head again. “No! You aren’t scary!” she laughed. She paused and squinted at him before giggling. “Okay, maybe a little scary. But you’re nice, I can tell.”

Gabriel smiled and kissed her forehead. “Your Uncle Jack thinks so too,” he teased.

“Are you going to get married?” she asked. “Terrance’s daddies just got married! He wore a suit and everything! He carried their rings down the aisle and he said that his daddies were crying the whole time because they were so happy!”

Jack felt a blush creep up his face as he stared at the back of Gabriel’s head. Jazz, the traitor, was laughing behind her hand, grinning viciously at him. Gabriel chuckled and glanced over his shoulder.

“Well, I think Jack needs more time to decide,” he winked. “But I wouldn’t mind telling people that I married the most beautiful man in existence.”

Jack was definitely as red as a tomato. He wanted to die right then and there. He wanted the ground to swallow him whole so that he didn’t have to deal with his sister’s teasing. His parents were going to have a field day with this; little Jackie finally got himself a man that wanted to marry him. He was growing up. Why did you have to feed them, Gabriel? Why?!

“Yay! Can I be the flower girl?” Hana asked.

“There won’t be a ceremony!” Jack shouted before he could stop himself. “I’d rather just go to a court office and sign the papers!”

“That’s fine; I’ve done the whole rigmarole of marriage once before,” Gabriel said with a wave of his hand. “I’m glad I won’t have to do it again.”  

Jack pursed his lips, but he couldn’t stop the smile from sliding across his face. Gabriel winked again before he munched on carrot sticks with Hana. How had he managed to find such an amazing man? This was unbelievable!

Gabriel helped set up the streamers outside, smiling as Jack chased Hana around the backyard. He couldn’t believe how happy Hana made him; she may as well have been his kid rather than his niece. Jazz loved the help she got from her brother, gushing about how good he was with kids and how she wished he’d adopted his own so that someone could truly appreciate it.

Privately, Gabriel felt he was too old to really appreciate kids anymore. Sure, he liked Hana and thought she was cute, but having a kid demanding all of his attention at his age? He’d already gone through that once with Jesse and once was enough for him. He didn’t need to go through it all again.

He got the last of the streamers taped into place and stepped back to admire his work. He didn’t think he’d ever seen so much pink in one place before, but Hana was all about the colour. He’d seen Jazz try to get her to wear a different colour once or twice, but she always refused until her mother put something pink into the ensemble. It was adorable and slightly intimidating; girl was already stubborn.

“Uncle Gabe!” Hana laughed and latched onto his leg. “Uncle Jack told me to say thank you!”

“For what?” Gabriel chuckled.

“For hosting my party! He said that you have very important work to do, but you put it aside for me!” Hana grinned up at him.

“Oh, did he now?” Gabriel smirked towards Jack as his boyfriend sat down at the picnic table and waved. “Well, Jack likes to ruin surprises, apparently.”

Hana giggled before she raced back over to her mother. Gabriel walked over to Jack and sat down beside him, wiping the layer of sweat off of his forehead. Jack smiled and leaned over to kiss him, drawing a soft purr of approval from Gabriel.

“Hey,” Jack murmured.

“Hey,” Gabriel smiled as he ran his fingers through Jack’s hair. “How’s my favourite person?”

“I don’t know; I haven’t talked to Jesse since yesterday,” Jack teased.

Gabriel let out a soft laugh as he kissed his love again. “Smart-ass,” he teased.

Jack smiled at him and snuggled in against his side, smearing his sweaty face against Gabriel’s shirt. Gabriel rolled his eyes in amusement before he got to his feet to start putting supper on the barbeque. He didn’t like that he wasn’t able to enjoy Jack’s presence more, but he knew that hungry kids were holy terrors. Hana was racing around the backyard again, grinning widely as Jack trotted after her. Kid needed a dog or something to wear her out. She had a lot of energy.

He started grilling, smiling as he watched the Morrisons play with little Hana. She was a lucky kid to be so loved and cared for. Was this what other people saw when they saw him and Jesse growing up? A father giving his kid everything he could possibly give in the hopes that he came out okay? He hoped so, because, more than anything, he wanted people to see Jesse and not him. Jesse was the important part of the equation; Gabriel wouldn’t be the man he was today without his son.

He flipped the burgers as he heard Hana yelp. He winced as she started crying, turning around to see what had happened. She had tripped over her feet and landed on the ground, but he couldn’t see any damage done to her. Jack rushed over to her immediately and picked her up, walking over to the picnic table to have a look.

“How bad?” Gabriel asked.

“She’ll need surgery,” Jack said sternly. “That leg will have to go. It’s no more good.”

“No!” Hana whined and shook her head. “It’s fine!”

“But you fell on it,” Jack said. “And you were crying so it must hurt. It’s probably broken. We’ll have to amputate, I’m afraid.”

Hana shook her head and Gabriel chuckled. That was a good way to stop a child freaking out over a small amount of pain. Probably crying more from embarrassment anyways. Hana argued with Jack for a moment before he kissed her knee and let her run off.

“She’s fine,” Jack mentioned as he walked over to Gabriel and leaned on his arm. “Not burning anything?”

“Of course not,” Gabriel smiled. “You’re really good with her.”

“Yah,” Jack smiled sadly as Jazz chased Hana around the yard. “I…used to want kids.”

“Not anymore?” Gabriel asked as he flipped the burgers over.

“I just…I missed that wagon, you know?” Jack shrugged. “I’m in my thirties now and when I think about having kids of my own, I know it’s not the thing for me.”

“You can help me whip Jesse into shape,” Gabriel teased. “I need all the help I can get now that he thinks he’s a big boy.”

Jack chuckled and leaned forward to kiss his cheek. “I’d like that,” he said. “A full grown kid that I don’t have to worry about fucking up.”

“I already did that for you,” Gabriel teased before he tipped Jack’s chin up to kiss him a little deeper. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Jack smiled up at him before he helped Gabriel get the buns ready for the burgers.

They carried everything over to the table and Hana eagerly piled pickles and ketchup onto her burger. She chirped her thanks before devouring the burger, stuffing so much into her mouth that Gabriel was worried that she was going to choke. Jazz and Jack gave similar sighs of “Hana” and she slowed down, grinning as she swallowed what was in her mouth.

“That was delicious,” Jazz smiled as she wiped her mouth clean. “Been a while since I’ve had a decent barbeque.”

“Well, it’s always barbeque weather in L.A,” Gabriel chuckled. “Move up here and I can barbeque whenever you want.”

“Don’t tempt me,” Jazz grimaced as she helped herself to another burger. “But I’m in a good neighbourhood back home and Hana’s getting to see her birth culture in action. I can’t beat what I have.”

“Well, I won’t twist your arm too much then,” Gabriel smiled. “Wouldn’t want to uproot Hana from a good place.”

“No,” Jazz smiled as Hana finished her burger. “Want another one, sweetie?”

“Yes please!” Hana grinned widely. “Uncle Jack, why aren’t hamburgers made of ham?”

Gabriel smirked as Jack pulled out his phone to look up why they were called hamburgers. Smart man; he was lucky he had a means to alleviate the child’s curiosity. He had to rack his brain for answers when Jesse was small. Hana giggled as she started eating another hamburger, listening to Jack answer all of her questions.

Gabriel winked as he got up and went inside to get the cake out of the fridge. Jazz smirked after him, clearly enjoying the delight he was taking in watching Jack “suffer” Hana’s questions. He checked the cake to make sure everything was in place before he set six candles into the top and lit them. He carried the cake outside and smiled as Jack and Jazz started singing happy birthday.

He set the cake down in front of Hana and she squealed as she stared at the bunnies bouncing around on the top. She took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and then blew out all the candles. They cheered for her before Jazz started cutting the cake up. Hana bounced excitedly before cramming her piece in her mouth, much to her mother’s exasperation.

“Hana, small bites, please!” Jazz said. “You’re going to choke.”

Hana shook her head as she swallowed. “No way! I can eat everything!”

“Polite people take small bites,” Gabriel said as he spooned a piece of cake into his mouth. “Okay, that’s amazing,” he groaned and covered his mouth. “Jack, you have to try this.”

Jack shook his head as he peeled a cupcake. “I hate mocha,” he said. “It’s so…bitter.”

“But it’s good,” Gabriel teased as he wiggled his spoon towards Jack’s mouth. “Please, sweetie, just one bite?”

“Will it make you leave me alone afterwards?” Jack teased back.

“Maybe,” Gabriel grinned widely.

“Fine,” Jack sighed. “But just one bite.”

Gabriel purred his approval as he popped the spoon into Jack’s mouth. He watched the wave of disgust roll across his love’s face as he pulled the mouthful off of the spoon and swallowed it. He gave a full-body shudder, earning a laugh from Hana as she watched him.

“Oh, you really don’t like it,” Gabriel pouted playfully. “Well, so much for keeping most of the cake.”

“I told you,” Jack stuck his tongue out. “You just set yourself up for disappointment.”

“With you? I’m never disappointed,” Gabriel smiled before he ate another bite of cake.

Jack touched his chest and smiled at him. They shared a soft kiss, earning a giggle from Hana as Jazz got up to bring the presents outside. They pulled away as Jazz set the humble pile down, pointing at Hana to make her sit down. She waited patiently as Jack handed her one present at a time, tearing it open and squealing with delight.

She got a few new dolls, a set of play-tools, a video game designed to help her with her basic educational skills, and an adorable set of bunny ears that moved with her mood. She giggled happily as she set the bunny ears on her head, grinning as Jack helped her to get them to move based on her thoughts. Gabriel’s gift was last; by design, no doubt; and Jack handed it to her.

“This is from Uncle Gabriel,” he said with a smile.

“Thank you,” Hana said pre-emptively before she tore the packaging off of the box.

She lifted the lid and stared at the bunny in the box. She picked it up in awe, staring at the pink and white felt stuffed toy. She sniffled before hugging it close, nuzzling into the soft material with a soft whimper.

“I love him!” she said. “Thank you so much!”

“I’m glad, Hana-bunny,” Gabriel smiled. “I worked very hard on him.”

“Huh?” Hana frowned at him. “You made him? By yourself?”

“Of course,” Gabriel smiled. “It’s my job to make toys like this. They’re very popular.”

Hana bit her lip to keep from crying as she rubbed at her eye. “Thank you, Uncle Gabe! I’ll love him forever,” she promised.

Gabriel smiled as he leaned past Jack to kiss her head. He was glad that she liked his gift so much. She deserved all the sweet gifts for being such a sweet girl. Just like her uncle deserved all the happiness in the world.