#coors lite
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mateo-skywalkersmom · 9 months ago
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My heart😍💙
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papas-majadas · 2 years ago
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carpwood · 7 months ago
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all yall talk about wanting to breed him i just wanna hold his hand and bring him flowers
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uhuraisgay · 2 months ago
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@lesbianlizzybennet tagged me in a describe yourself with 9 images you already have saved meme and i had to log onto my PHONE to do it. i hope this is funny i ijboled the whole time
tagging anyone who wants to im bad at remembering urls and the tagging system is ass on here
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toiletwipes · 2 years ago
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Oh so the funniest part of going to a funeral on your dad's side is telling your moms side of the family what happened. Not that funerals are funny and I love my dead grandpa but he's dead and I am not normal.
I'm telling them "so yeah we got up super early and had to go make sure dad didn't need an ice bath for the funeral."
One of my aunts: "I'm sorry.. an ice bath?? What do you mean??"
Me: "you know, when you wake him up by throwing a bucket of ice on his bed"
Another aunt: "why would you need to do that"
Me, realizing this is a whole can of worms I never opened for them: .... "just in case, you never know."
Me: "so anyways they kept saying he looked good and I was normal about it but I gotta be honest he looked like a wax figure in a museum and they had a presentation on loop for 30 minutes. Awful, I tell you."
The first aunt: "you don't go to funerals often do you?"
Me: "not really. Is it-"
Her: "-because it's standard yeah."
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cal-is-a-cryptid · 1 year ago
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Somethings that makes me happy #13:
A cold beer on a Friday night
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limoneads · 1 year ago
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the opening scene in cobra kai where it zooms in in johnny lawrence writhing on the ground and then fades into him sleeping in his bed with the chip bag to show he LITERALLY peaked in highschool and hasn't emotionally gotten up from that moment. art. i need 800 more of these thank you
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beerstore · 11 months ago
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Craft Beer St Kilda
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penpoise · 1 year ago
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Coors Light Calories: Sip Smart, Stay Light
In a world where health-conscious choices intersect with social indulgence, understanding the caloric content of your favorite beverages becomes paramount. Among the array of beer options, Coors Light stands out not just for its refreshing taste but also for its low-calorie profile. I. Introduction A. Brief overview of the significance of calorie awareness In a society increasingly focused on…
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maybankswhore · 10 months ago
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𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐍𝐄.
SUMMARY: you didn’t mean to fall in love with jj maybank. you knew how it would end. and yet his charming smile and blonde hair blinded you from the ugly truth and now you were engaged to rafe cameron , and stuck with jj’s love in your soul.
WARNINGS: arranged marriages , mutual pining , reader with daddy issues & mild language.
PAIRINGS: rafe cameron x reader + jj maybank x reader.
“ oh i can’t , stop you putting roots in my dreamland. my house of stone your ivy grows , and now i’m covered in you. ”
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“I’m JJ.”
You had remembered the first time you had met him like it was yesterday. You could close your eyes and feel the cool breeze on your skin and hear the waves crashing against one another. Your stomach still fluttered the exact same way , the skin of your cheeks turning a similar shade of red as you pictured the way he had stood in front of you. Cut of jean shorts , a old and tattered Coors Lite t–shirt with the sleeves torn off.
He had a boyish grin on his face when he approached. Smelling of stale weed and spearmint— a scent that had become your favorite mix.
You were reluctant. You tried brushing him off , giving short answers. You weren’t even supposed to be on the cut anyway. Sarah had convinced you to sneak out with her , something that was unusual for you. Just by the look of him made your heart pitter patter in a way that just felt . . . wrong. JJ Maybank was nothing but trouble for you and you knew that. But you couldn’t fight him off. You couldn’t shake the feeling of him away , the desire to know him and the girlish bubble of warmth that encased you that night was hard for you to ignore.
That night was only the beginning. You had found yourself sneaking out more often. Your father started to annoy you more , and every time he’d try and talk to you about what was to happen in six months , the quicker you tried to avoid it.
Life with JJ was different. It was different but good. He was adventurous , always helping push you to do things you wouldn’t have normally done. The way he saw the world , how he lived it , brought a sense of longing to you. His eyes were like the ticket to freedom and it was easy to forget with him.
Falling in love with him just happened. It was silly and cliche to think that it was love at first sight. You felt childish thinking that way but every time you replayed that night in your head , something in your chest just knew. It knew that JJ was the boy that you had always dreamed about. The boy all girls wished to find , to love.
It was the fourth month when things got harder. Your father had plans. Big ones. And the closer it got to your eighteenth birthday , the faster he tried to push the process.
“You know the Cameron’s are a great deal around here.” Said your father during a Sunday dinner. “Wards boy would take care of you.”
It had been so silent , you could hear a hair pin drop. Everyone’s eyes were on you , awaiting to here your answer. Your heart was beating so loud , you were afraid it’d beat out of your chest and fall out on the dinner table. Your fork scraped against the expensive china with distaste.
“Well?”
“I’m not—” you opened your mouth to protest but you just didn’t know how. You were so used to being the best girl for him. Always done up to look pretty at his business dinners. Making the best grades so he could boast about you and make his ego inflated. That is what you were taught and that is what you were to do. “I mean , can’t we wait a little bit longer?”
“Rafe isn’t going to wait around for a wife forever , Y/N.” He told you sternly. “You’ve known about this since you were sixteen. Your mother and I need this. You need this. You won’t have to want for nothing in your life.”
God , your stomach had been so sick. You tossed and turned all night , soaking your pillow with tears. There was this ache in your chest you couldn’t shake. A dull pain that lingered throughout the day. None of it was sitting right with you. And the inability to change it.
Another month went by and Midsummers had came. The day left a dry socket in your mouth. JJ had promised to be there , kissing you goodbye the night before and telling you he’d find a way to sneak in at least one dance.
You should’ve told him then.
This big secret , this big lie , hung over your head like a bad dream. You just thought that you could ignore it. That it’d go away. You wanted to tell him. You knew you needed to break it off with him— but you were selfish. You were selfish and just a girl in love with a boy you couldn’t have.
What were you to do?
It came as a surprise when Rafe had cornered you. A sly smirk on his face as he approached you cowering away in the corner with a bad stomachache. “Well don’t you look gorgeous.”
You could only force a smile so big. Swallowing the harsh lump in your throat as you muttered a small: “Thank you,” in return.
“I’m sure you know what our parents have been talking about all summer.” Rafe hummed at you. His eyes drinking you in. You shifted uncomfortable under his gaze and your eyes refused to meet his. “I’m a man of my word , Y/N. And I never let my father down.”
You grimaced. “I’m aware.”
Rafe had leaned in so close that his breath fanned at this skin of your ear. You bit back the need to push him away and only hid the expression of disdain.
“I know your little secret with that dirty Pogue. . .” his words were icey. The tone of his voice caused a sinking feeling in your stomach and a swirl of panic within you. “I don’t like to share what’s mine and I don’t plan to start. You tell him or I will.”
And with that Rafe had backed up and left you alone to rush into the bathroom in tears , with nothing but overwhelming hopelessness. You weren’t his. You never would be.
Not when JJ Maybank had already implanted himself inside of you , tangling up with your soul so tightly that it was hard to breathe without him.
When the time came to finally tell him. He had already knew. Word got out and Kiara had gotten to him first.
He stood in front of you on the beach. The very same beach , the very same spot that he had first met you.
You bounced over to him ready to see him. You had missed him. But the smile on your face fell when you were met with a teary eyed JJ.
“You’re marrying him?”
The look on your face said it all. You stammered out something that resembled a response but all it sounded like was blubbering. A humorous , dry laugh escaped JJ’s throat as he looked away from you. Hands tugging at his hair. “No fuckin’ way.”
“JJ please— you don’t— you don’t understand.” You tried reasoning. A lump already forming in your throat as you tried to find some way to ease the situation.
“How long have you been seein’ him?” JJ fired the question at you. His emotions on fire as he shifted between anger and hurt and most of all— betrayal. “What the fuck was this?” He motioned between the two of you. “Was I just a stupid fuckin’ game? Something to piss off daddy?”
His words were like knives. You shook your head at him quickly. “JJ no! Of course not. I love you. I haven’t been seeing him— I haven’t!”
“Yet your marrying him!” JJ shouted. “I gotta say , Y/N. You really got me good. I thought. . .” the crack in his voice only made you cry harder. “I thought you were different.”
“I didn’t have a say! I didn’t have a choice!” Your own voice scared you. It was loud , raw. Your eyes chased his pacing body around the beach desperately. “I tried talking my father out of it. He’s had this arrangement in the books for years and I didn’t know until before I met you. Before everything changed for me. I—”
“Then why? Why did you keep coming around? Why did you keep seeing me if you knew. . .” JJ felt like a pussy. He was so angry. So mad at the world and the circumstances. His friends told him not to go and fall in love with you. They told him to leave you alone. But he was too hard headed and infatuated to listen. You had made him feel things he never even considered feeling before— he loved you without even knowing what love was.
“I tried JJ.” You reasoned. “I tried staying away but I just couldn’t. I—” you shook your head as you tried to find anything you could to make it better but you knew there was nothing. “I love you so much.” You told him breathlessly. “And I hate that I wasn’t honest with you but I just thought I could change it. That it wasn’t real.”
JJ couldn’t stand anymore. He feel to his knees , dropping onto to the sand as he felt that organ in his chest slowly come to a stop. Everything was happening so fast. He had just got you and before he knew it , you were leaving. JJ didn’t know if he could recover from this. He fell for you too hard , too fast. “I can’t watch you marry him. I just can’t. Not when. . .” he sighed deeply and looked up at you. Eyes glazed and sad. “Not when I’m the one you should be with.”
You kneeled down in front of him. Sniffling a bit as you tried calming down. You reached out to touch his face softly and JJ let out another cry , absentmindedly leaning into the palm of your hand. “I am so sorry , JJ. I’m just so sorry.”
JJ was quiet for a minute. His eyes were screwed shut hoping that when he opened them again , everything would just be a bad dream. Though it wasn’t. And he was met with your sad eyes looking back at him with regret.
“You don’t have to do this.”
“I don’t have a choice.”
“Bullshit.” JJ scoffed. “There’s always a choice.”
You shook your head at him gently. Bursting with everything but what you wanted. Happiness. JJ gave you all of that and yet , you weren’t allowed it. It wasn’t fair. Nothing in this life had seemed fair. “I tried. I begged and begged him not to make me do this but he won’t listen to me. He only cares about money.”
“We could runaway.” JJ said suddenly.
The thought was immediate. Everything swirling in his mind as to how to make it happen. It wasn’t ideal but it was a solution. The only solution.
“JJ—”
“I’ve got some money saved up. We could take the boat and leave. Just you and me.”
“You love it here.” You told him softly. “Your friends are. . . your life.”
“I won’t love it anymore without you.” JJ argued. “Even if you did marry him , I’d leave. I couldn’t stand the thought of it. I can’t—” JJ shook his head and swallowed harshly. He brought a hand up behind your neck and brought your face closer to his. His forehead rested against yours as his eyes fluttered closed. “Please just. . . leave. Leave with me.”
You weren’t sure how this would go. There were so many uncertainties. So many people would be hurt. You’d be leaving behind the only life you ever knew for a boy you had met on the beach. But picturing life with Rafe Cameron wasn’t the way you wanted to spend the rest of your days on this island. Just the thought made you feel sick.
So before you could think it , your mouth opened and your heart spoke before your head got the chance to argue.
“Okay. I’ll go with you.”
part two?
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tightjeansjavi · 7 months ago
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The Rite of Movement | drabble
“Daddy’s not bluffing, baby love”
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A/N: you know you’re super dedicated when you find yourself at home ✨practicing✨ just so that the smut makes sense and is easy to visualize 👹 and just when I thought that Joel and baby love couldn’t get any nastier…😮‍💨 oh, and just in case anyone gets confused with the addition of Ellie, this is after she’s adopted (spoilers, but not really bc she’s Joel’s kid in every universe let’s be real)
~word count: 2.0k~
Summary: Ellie is away at Dina’s for the weekend leaving you and Joel with the house completely to yourselves
Pairing | pornstar!joel x pornstar!female reader
Warnings: smut, established relationship. reader and Joel are pornstars, Joel is in his 40’s reader is in her 30’s, big ole fat daddy kink, fingering, unprotected piv, big dom energy from Joel, baby love is acting like brat, sexual punishment, spanking, degrading language but it’s hot, okay?, use of slut, brat, etc, semi-public sex, voyerism (Tommy), language, mentions of alcohol, Ellie exists in this universe!!, reader has no physical descriptions, readers nickname is baby love, +18 minors dni!
series masterlist
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Ellie was away for the weekend with Dina and her family leaving you and Joel with the house completely to yourselves…which was a rare occurrence these days.
You and Joel have since then moved the home studio back to the Miller-Co office. You aren’t doing much filming these days, anyway. This was a mutual decision, and this also gave Tommy the opportunity to show Joel that he could handle the business on his own come the day that you and Joel would eventually retire. But with Ellie gone for the weekend, you and Joel had the time to relax and that’s how you found yourselves spending the morning by the pool.
Joel was comfortably laying poolside, cheaters perched on his nose that was buried in the book he was reading that Ellie had recommended to him. Artemis was laying by his feet, bathing in the sun while you were lounging in the pool. You had discarded your bikini top to the pool's edge to avoid any tan lines while you were lounging on your stomach along one of the extremely comfortable, and extra durable inflatables.
Artemis had grown curious of the water as she watched you float by, and before Joel could stop her, she hopped down from the chair and trotted over to the pool's edge. She was an agile little thing, having no problem jumping right onto your bare back and curling up against your warm, sunbathed skin.
Joel shook his head, muttering under his breath as he reached for his phone so he could take a picture while you reached one hand behind your back to give her a few gentle pets.
He posted the photo to his instagram with the caption: my two sun babies 🌞💓
Ellie had texted the family group chat immediately when she saw the photo:
I hope you’re disinfecting the pool before I get home 🙄
Joel: shouldn’t you be off your phone and paying attention to Dina, kiddo? 🤔
Ellie: u text like an old man lol
Baby Love: lol. He does
Tommy: where was my invite?
Joel: I do not text like an old man 😡
-to Tommy: inappropriate
Ellie: do too 🤭
Tommy: inappropriate that I wanna come over and swim?? Get ur head out of the gutter lol
Joel: do not
Baby Love: you’re not gonna win this one, baby.
Ellie: see, even mom agrees!
Joel: there’s too many gals in this household 🙄
Ellie: yea, man! Ur outnumbered lol
Joel: don’t I know it
Tommy: I’m coming over
Joel: no you’re not
Baby Love: can you bring a case of Modelo’s?
Ellie: I don’t think Tommy knows what those are lol
Joel: how would you know what those are? 👀
Ellie: did I say something?
Tommy: why can’t u just be normal and drink Coors Lite lol
Joel: don’t start gaslighting me young lady
Baby Love: because unlike u, I have taste
Ellie: ooooh burn
Tommy: ouch 😓 I thought we were friends!
Joel: 😒
Ellie: I’m more of a Modelo gal myself
Joel: ELLIE
Baby Love: that’s my girl!
-to Tommy: we are friends 🩷 you just have shit taste in beer
Joel: where are u getting beer from
Ellie: that’s none of your beeswax
Joel: Ellie Miller, I will ground your ass so fast the second you get home
Baby Love: it was me. I’m the culprit
Tommy: I don’t forgive u
Ellie: don’t punish mom! She said I can drink as long as I’m safe 😇
Tommy: lol I’m not coming over, I changed my mind!
Baby Love: but my Modelos :(
Joel to Baby Love in a private chat:
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“Who the fuck do you think you’re callin’ a pussy?!” He growled from the chair, completely sitting up now with his legs swung over the side just as you quickly tucked your phone underneath your left boob and looked over your shoulder at him with a faux innocent expression on your face.
“I am, pussy.”
“Wanna say that a third time?” He challenged you, standing up with his hands planted on his hips as he approached the edge of the pool. Even Artemis sensed the tension rise so she quickly hopped off your back as soon as the raft was close to the pool's ledge.
“Artie.” You frowned, “come back. Daddy’s only messing! He’s not actually gonna do anything!” You grabbed your phone from under your boob and carefully placed it on the pools ledge so it wouldn’t get wet, and just as you were about to push the raft back to the middle of the pool to float away, Joel hand crouched down and grabbed ahold of the corner of the raft, yanking you towards him.
“I said, wanna say that a third time?” He snipped.
Oh he’s mad now, alright.
You let out a huff, rolling over onto your back so your bare tits were on full display with your arms languidly crossed behind your head as you peered up at him through your sunglasses, smirk plastered on your pretty lips, “daddy’s a pussy and he’s not gonna do anything about it.” You chimed.
“Fuckin’ little brat.” He muttered as he pushed your raft away from the ledge before he dove in underneath it.
You quickly flipped over onto your stomach, pathetically attempting to paddle away just as he resurfaced with his face inches away from your dangling ankles. You let out a playful squeal when he nibbles on your calf as his big hands and broad arms easily slide up your thighs, thumbs looping through the flimsy strings that are barely holding your bikini bottoms together. Even in the deep end of the pool, Joel is standing, more like…looming over the raft and casting a dark shadow over your bare back.
“Don’t think ya heard me the first time, baby love.” He rasps, yanking your bikini bottoms down swiftly over your ass and thighs, “said that you had ‘bout five seconds to take these flimsy ass bikini bottoms off before I did it for you.” He tuts, grasping the outside of your thighs as he pulls you further down the length of the raft as if you’re just a measly rag doll. “And then what do ya do?” He asks, not needing a response.
“You call me a fuckin’ pussy.” He bends over, harshly biting at your left cheek, leaving visible indentations in your skin from his canines, “slutty little brat my girl is, hmm?” He teases, biting down on the right cheek as you let out a squeal.
He pulls back, marveling at his work before he brings the palm of his hand down against the meatiest part of your left cheek hard enough to send your back arching in surprise. He watches your plush skin recoil before he does it again, and then the same to the right cheek.
“I’m—I’m sorry, daddy! You aren’t a pussy! Not even close to being one!”
“You ain't sorry, baby love. Cus’ this is what you wanted all along, right? Wanted your daddy to come in here and teach his bratty little slut a lesson? Well, your wish is comin’ true!” He chuckles, using his thumbs to spread your cheeks apart before he spits a glob of saliva between them, watching it drool and drip between your ass and thighs. “Show me your fuckin’ pussy, baby love. Be a good girl now for daddy.”
“Yes, daddy.” You mewled, “you got me. It was my plan all along.” you suppress a giggle, lifting yourself up on your elbows as you spread your thighs apart, arching your back further so he had a clear and direct view of your pussy. “You gonna give my pussy a kiss daddy? I’m really sorry.” He doesn’t need to see your face to know that you’re pouting.
He scoffs, dropping his hands down from your ass to spread you open further. He intently watches the way your little hole pulses under his harsh stare, begging for any form of stimulation. “You think I’m gonna give your pussy a kiss, baby love? Think you deserve that?” He snickers, leaning in to drag his nose right through your slick folds, inhaling deeply before he pulls back, “think you oughta just take whatever daddy fuckin’ gives ya, sweet girl.”
“Oh, fuck.” You whimpered, dropping your head between your shoulders, “Daddy, please. I’m so sorry for calling you a pussy! I’ll—I’ll never do it again, I swear!”
“Hush up, baby love. Quit your whinin’ and take what daddy fuckin’ gives you.” He growled. It was a miracle that even with his added weight to the float, the damn thing didn’t pop from the pressure as he wasted no time to slip two of his thick fingers inside of your pussy till they were knuckle deep with his palm pressing flat between the apex of your thighs. You felt the weight of his chest and shoulders pressing into your back while his fingers shallowly thrusted inside of you at a merciless pace, scissoring you open with each thrust, creating ripples in the water below the raft.
O—oh—oh fuck! Fuck! Fuccck!” You cried out, lurching forward as his fingers pistoned inside of you, “daddy, please! Please! I’m sorry!” Your eyes rolled back in your skull when he crooks his fingers, curling them against the spongy spot inside of you that has you seeing spots of stars cloud your vision.
He’s leaned over you completely now in a possessive manner. His lips at your ear, teeth nipping and biting anywhere they can, “if you’re a good fuckin’ slut for daddy, maybe he’ll reward you with his cock, because you and I both know that’s what my girl wants is her daddy’s thick cock splittin’ her in fuckin’ half. Ain’t that right, baby love?”
“YES!” You yelled, voice strained and on the verge of cracking as you started to roll your hips back against his hand, meeting the harsh thrusts of his fingers just as the back gate opened—
“Hey! I brought the Modelos—OH FUCK!” Tommy yelled in surprise, nearly dropping the case of beer in his arms at the sight of you coming undone around Joel’s fingers.
“GOD DAMMIT, TOMMY! I FUCKIN’ SAID YOU COULDN’T COME OVER!” Joel snapped, thrusting his fingers faster as he briefly glanced over his shoulder at his brother, “can’t ya damn well see I’m a little busy punishin’ my girl for bein’ a fuckin’ brat?!”
You weakly waved in Tommy’s direction, before completely giving into the pleasure with a blissed out look plastered on your face, “pass me one of those when we’re done! I’m parched!”
“Yeah, you’re fuckin’ parched alright.” Joel growled against your ear.
“Some things never change, ain’t that right Artie?��� Tommy snickered as he attempted to crouch down and pet her, but she hissed and swatted at his hand.
“TOMMY!” Joel snapped, using his freehand to push his swim trunks over his hips so that he could replace his fingers with his cock. “Make yourself useful and gimme one of those beers, would ya!” He spit into his palm as his cock sprang free and slapped up against his stomach. He gave the base of his cock a few quick pumps before he slipped his fingers out of you, your pussy made a wet squelching noise as he slowly fed you his cock, inch by inch, stretching you open till he was bottomed out with his hips firmly pressed against your ass. The float had deflated considerably, but man, it was a trooper.
Tommy walked over, beer in hand, doing his best to not smirk at the scene unfolding before him as he held the beer out in Joel’s direction. “What did she do this time?” He mused.
Joel snatched the beer from his hand, twisting the cap off with his teeth before he took a swig, bringing his freehand down against your ass.
“I called him—fuck.” You moaned deeply, lip harshly taken between your teeth when he stretched you open. God, did you love your man’s cock.
“She called me a fuckin’ pussy.” Joel snapped his hips forward with his hand acting as an anchor around your hip. He took another swig from the bottle, blunt fingernails digging into your skin, “now fuck yourself on daddy’s cock like the good little slut that you are, baby love.”
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clearexpertarcade · 1 month ago
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Mike stood shirtless in the dimly lit garage, staring down at the belly that had crept up on him over the past few months. He ran his hand across the soft curve of his stomach, feeling the weight of his choices—mostly beer and late-night snacks. Around him, empty cans of Coors Lite were scattered across the table, each one a reminder of their hope that light beer would keep them from getting fat.
Beside him, Jason was in the same boat, his shorts visibly tighter as his own gut rounded out over the waistband. Neither of them had ever been fitness enthusiasts. They didn’t have chiseled bodies or six-packs—never had. But they had held onto the belief that switching to light beer would somehow stop the inevitable.
Mike chuckled, giving his belly a jiggle. "So much for the light beer keeping this in check."
Jason glanced down at his own expanding midsection, smirking. "Yeah, it’s still beer. Guess we were hoping for a miracle."
They both laughed, the sound bouncing off the walls of the garage. Jason popped open another can and took a long drink, feeling his stomach push out even more as he leaned back against the table.
"You know," Mike said, grabbing another beer from the table, "we switched to this stuff thinking we wouldn’t have to change anything. Thought we could just keep drinking without getting fat."
Jason nodded, wiping his mouth. "Exactly. But now, here we are. Same love for beer, just with bigger bellies."
They clinked their cans together, a shared toast to their failed plan. They weren’t upset about the weight they’d gained—they had never been the kind of guys who worried about hitting the gym. But they’d hoped that light beer would be their way out, a way to keep enjoying their favorite drink without paying the price in pounds.
"I don’t think we ever stood a chance," Jason said, eyeing his reflection in the window, his belly pushing forward more than ever. "We weren’t exactly sporting six-packs to begin with."
Mike chuckled again. "Yeah, man, I don’t think we were ever gonna be ripped. But hey, round’s a shape, right?"
Jason grinned, raising his can. "Round is definitely a shape."
They both took another sip, settling into the reality they had slowly embraced. They weren’t hitting the gym anytime soon, but they weren’t giving up their beer either. The light beer hadn’t saved them from gaining weight, but neither of them seemed to mind. They were content, comfortable even, in their bodies—bellies and all.
The light beer hadn’t done its job, but it hadn’t taken away their enjoyment of life, either. And as they stood there, with another round in hand, they knew this was just part of who they were.
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andavs · 6 months ago
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Beers of 9-1-1
Updating my post on the beers of 911 to include the rest of s6 and all of s7! A few more got added because either the show added more, some got used a couple more times, or I just finally managed to figure out the names that have been haunting me.
All of these beers are fictional prop brands, and many have been used in other movies and shows. They come from prop vendors, not the 911 prop department itself.
The show uses a lot of brands of beer! Different brands will peak and get used a lot in one or two seasons, and then they tend to get relegated to background extras, or occasionally a non-main character will drink one. It adds variety and a little realism, so not everyone is always drinking the same beer.
There's been many more beyond these, but they've either been used once, they're only in the background, or I can't read the labels—yet.
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Alexander’s Famous Ale This beer was mostly used in season two. Chimney was drinking it in Chimney Begins and then Athena and Hen each had one while discussing the bank heist in Oceans 911—the only time they’ve had beer during their chats. Since then, it’s become a background beer that extras drink, but Ramon was drinking one during Eddie’s homecoming party, and Red was drinking one when he and Buck first met. There was a can of it on a table at the bachelor party in There Goes the Groom.
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American Colonial A new beer with season seven that so far has only appeared in There Goes the Groom.
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Blind Fox Ale This was the most used beer before Genuine took its place in season six, but as of 7.10 they're tied. It was used the most through seasons two and three. Buck has had it the most (six times), but Chimney, Hen, Eddie, Tommy, and Michael all drank it too. It hung out in the background a bit, and then came back when Eddie and Buck drank it at the bachelor party in There Goes the Groom.
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Brenner’s Black Cat Brew This is a mostly background/set dressing beer. Buck, Chimney, and Maddie each had one while talking about the call center takeover in The Taking of Dispatch 911, but otherwise it mostly shows up in the background or in fridges (usually Buck’s).
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Cerveza Extra This is a Corona Extra dupe that was mostly used in the third season. Chimney was drinking one in the party for Buck in Kids Today, and he drank several at the bar during Seize the Day. Buck was drinking one when Eddie dropped off Chris in The Searchers, he had one at Eddie’s party in Seize the Day, and then he served one to Connor in Peru in Buck Begins. There were also a couple around Eddie’s house in Seize the Day.
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Curson Light This is a Coors Lite dupe that’s only popped up a few times. Buck and Eddie each have one in Fallout, when Buck’s apologizing for not being there during the lawsuit. Eddie has another one in Fools while he’s talking to Buck about Chris, while Buck has a Grand Ale. It was also used for extras in the bar scene in Seize the Day.
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Genuine Genuine first popped up in Hen Begins; Hen drinks one while she’s out with Athena for the first time. After that, it didn’t show up again until Hen and Chimney’s reunion in Fear-a-Phobia, but in season 6, it became the most used beer of the whole show.
Eddie and Buck drink it the most (Let the Games Begin, Recovery, Mixed Feelings) but so do a lot of other characters and extras. The guy who blew up his neighbor in Crash & Learn was drinking one, Buck gave one to Connor in Recovery, and Chimney and Maddie had a bunch in their fridge in Lost & Found. A number of the extras around the poker game were drinking it, and they were sprinkled around the hotel room in There Goes the Groom.
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Grand Ale Grand Ale was pretty much only used in the third season. Chimney drank it while he and Maddie discussed having kids in Kids Today and during the poker game with Josh in Fools. Buck also had one in Fools while he and Eddie were talking about Chris and the skateboard. Michael had one with dinner in Athena Begins. It got used in the background a couple times, and Rita/Jeanine was carrying one at the beginning of What’s Your Grievance? in season four, but as far as I can tell, it hasn’t come back.
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Heisler Gold Ale Heisler didn’t appear in the show until There Goes the Groom at the bachelor party, and so far it hasn’t been used since.
This is such a well known prop beer that it has a cult following. You can get it on shirts. It’s been used in How I Met Your Mother and New Girl and probably hundreds of other shows and movies.
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Isla Tropical This is mostly a background beer for set dressing, but Lucy was drinking one in Love is in the Air when Buck and Natalia ran into her at the bar. It showed up a few times in What’s Your Fantasy?, scattered around the college house where Darius lives.
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Meichtry Lite & Draft We have yet to see anyone actually drinking these beers, but they are used for set dressing, specifically in Buck and Chimney’s fridges (Recovery, Starting Over), and at the frat house call in Animal Instincts. It’s also a pretty common prop beer that’s been in a lot of shows. (Note the Brenner’s Black Cat in Buck’s fridge on the left behind the ginger beer!)
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Mendoza Lager This beer showed up mid-season five in Outside Looking In. Buck was drinking one at the bar, and he had another in Starting Over on his balcony with Maddie. Hen drank a couple on her first date with Karen in Tomorrow. It was also on the counter behind Ramon in Hero Complex.
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Penn Pavel’s This beer has only been used twice. In Kid’s Today, Buck had a couple open on the counter when Eddie came to get him out of bed, and then Eddie was drinking one at Buck’s loft during Treasure Hunt.
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Rio Negro So far, Eddie’s the only main character who drinks Rio Negro. He and Lena each had one at the junkyard fight in Rage, he had a couple at the bar in Seize the Day, and he had a couple at his parents’ house in Hero Complex. As far as I can tell, this is the only beer that’s this character-specific.
This beer comes up regularly with background extras, usually in bar scenes, and extras were drinking it during the party at Eddie’s house in Seize the Day. In Step Nine, Herman was holding one in the photo on his dashboard.
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Samuel Jacksons This is a fairly new one and a Samuel Adams dupe. It first popped up in Boston, while Chimney and Eli were talking in Eli’s basement and there were a couple scattered around in the bagpipe rescue scene, and then it came back in season 7. Buck opened one before Tommy kissed him in Buck, Bothered, and Bewildered, and then he and Eddie were both drinking one when Buck came out to him in You Don't Know Me.
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Tux’s Red Ribbon This beer is a Pabst Blue Ribbon dupe and has only been in two episodes. Chimney had one at the party he was hosting at the end of A Whole New You, and then it was the only beer anyone drank in In Another Life. Buck and Chimney each had one, and Buck, Daniel, and Phillip all had one together on Buck’s couch—which is notable as something being off because Phillip is usually drinking scotch. I don’t believe it’s ever been used as a background beer.
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arcanefox207 · 4 months ago
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bottom-lexa · 1 year ago
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Also what’s the deal with most of y’all’s beer being Lite or low calorie? Like Bud Lite and Miller Lite and Coors Light and?? Why what’s the deal with that? And these beers don’t have a regular version either?
Americans, what beer do y’all drink? Or rather, what beer does your dad drink coz that’s sorta the demographic I’m looking for.
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assigning a bat three somethings every day
day 2: dick
the song tightrope from the greatest showman
footie pajamas
Coors lite
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