#like gagging and exclaiming “argh!”

[tiny-chubby-bird]

So like a normal person I got kind of curious and looked at the names of the petrified drow so I could try looking for possible name meanings, but I'm no drow expert. I could only look at the Drow Names site and hope for any similarities. These are my best guesses:

Dhourn (Dhaun: infested, plague. Houn: magic, trail, way)

Izwae (izz: hidden, mask, masked. Wae: heir, inheritor, princess)

Moy (May: beautiful, beauty, silver. Mol: blue, storm, thunder, wind. oj: aura, cloak, hide, skin)

Arcagh (word arc: curve, bow. Akor/Alak: beloved, best, first. agh: breaker, destruction, end, omega)

Tecothy (like Timothy? Teb: blade, sharp, sword)

Artimezt (Inspired by Artemis maybe? zt: finder, hunter)

Important to note that some of the similar words/names I found and used here are the feminine versions, and I remember seeing a detailed post somewhere in which someone took Kar'niss' name and tried to translate it, in which they also mentioned what it means if a male drow uses a feminine name version, but I forgot...

[xxiamtiebrousxx]

Chapter 11 "Three Days" (Head-Shots | Sniper x Reader)

I woke up drooling on Mundy’s shoulder. His hat was covering his eyes and his shades were neatly tucked in his shirt pocket. Everyone was wounded and tired. Some were passed out. The van hit a bump, jolting anyone who wasn’t asleep, awake. I smacked my lips together, sitting up straight. I yawned and stretched out my arms. Heavy and Scout were still up front, though Scout was passed out. 

“Hey,” Mundy said. He wiped the drool off my face. “Sleep well?” he asked. 

“Yeah,” I replied. “Road’s been a bit bumpy. I think I need to see a chiropractor.” I leaned back on Mundy, who slouched against the wall between the back and front of the van. We hit another bump and possibly ran over a can, making a sharp turn. Hopefully it wasn’t an animal or anything. Soldier interrupted a conversation Scout and Pauling were having over a video chat. “How far are we from the base?” I asked.

“Not that far, we’re almost there,” Spy said. He lit a cigarette. Pyro watched the lighter go out. The van went up a small hill and made a hard right, pulling into the garage. We were back at RED Bread. We got out of the back when a body dropped off the roof. I screamed, clinging on to Mundy. Soldier walked around the van and kicked the body.

“Where’d the body come from?” I asked, nudging it with my foot. Sniper walked to the front of the van. Sticking out from under the hood was another body. I shivered. “Let’s just move over here,” I said. I followed Mundy to the table. :Hey doc, hey Engie,” I said as the two entered the room. I took a seat next to Mundy. Scout tossed the keys at Medic and Engineer, which they let fall.

“Nice catch,” he said.

“Yeah. Listen now,” Engineer said. “We've been running some experiments on the Teleporter.” Soldier joined us. 

“What about it?” I asked. “It seems to be working fine.”

“Well yeah,” he replied. “Y'all ought to take a look at this.” He turned on the teleporter. It spun around and bread appeared. 

“That is big news,” Scout replied. “Um, is the Demo back with the beer yet? Cause I…” Medic breaks the bread in half to reveal nasty, green lumps and white things sticking out. I yelped, giving out a gagging noise.

Ewwww! It’s moldy!

“Whoa! What the heck is that?!” Scout exclaimed. 

“Tumors!” Medic replied cheerfully. I looked at Mundy.

“Why did he say it so happily?” I asked. He shook his head. Engineer adjusted his helmet, looking at us concerned.

“Y’all know what this means, right?” he asked. Soldier, out of the blue, grabbed poor Scout by his neck and slammed him against the table. I stood up.

“Woah, Solly!” I exclaimed.

“Argh! We cannot teleport bread anymore!” he yelled. 

“Whoa! Whoa!” Engineer said, separating them both. “Not exactly, Soldier.” Smiling, he placed his hand on Soldier. “You teleport as much bread as you like.”

That doesn’t sound well.

Yeah, it doesn’t.

Engineer’s smile faded and he took off his helmet. “That goes for all of ya,” he said. “If there's something any of y'all wanted to do before ya… Well, died. Now would be a good time.” 

Wait, death?

“How long before these tumors kill us?” Spy asked. I was shocked! Killing? Death??? What happened? Do we all have tumors inside of us? Was it the bread we ate? Of course it was! I had some too! 

“Vell, let's see,” Medic replied. “Ve all use the teleporter, let's say six times a day. Times four years. Minus ve're not bread. Hmm.” I bit my thumb. Even though I haven’t been here for four years, we used teleporters practically for everything! I even tried one out on my first day. Medic turned around. “Three days. Yes, we all have three days to live.” 

My gut dropped and so did my jaw. Three days until our worlds ended.

Soldier tried to count his fingers while all of us took time to process our expiration dates when Demo came out of the teleporter, wearing a sombrero, glasses and holding a case of beer. He looked at us, confused.

“What?” he asked. 

“Now’s not the time, buddy,” Scout said. “We have um, three days to live.” I stood up from my seat, looked around at everyone, and walked away. 

“Goodnight,” I called out, walking into the hall. Footsteps followed me behind. I turned around. Mundy was the one following me. He had a smile, a worried smile on his face. “What is it?” I asked, stopping in my tracks. 

“Oi wanted to ask you something, but Oi don’t know how to say it,” he said. “Oi guess it’s the fact we’re closer to death than we all thought.”

“That’s fine,” I said, approaching him. “I guess we’re all in shock to know our death is right around the corner.” Mundy rubbed the back of his neck. 

“Do you uh, have any plans for spending the last bit of your time?” he asked. I twiddled around with my fingers.

You could spend it with him. It’s not like he’s going anywhere. 

I’m not going anywhere either.

“Um, if it’s okay with you, could I spend it with you?” I asked, turning a bit red.

“Sure,” he replied. I smiled a bit. “Come, you can stay with me tonight,” he said, taking my hand. We walked out of the building, through the garage, and outside. His van was parked next to Engineer’s truck. There was a red sports car. 

I wonder who it belongs to.

Maybe Spy. He’s rich enough to afford it. Mundy held open the door and let me in first. I turned on the lights. Same old room, nothing changed from the last time I was in here. I sighed. Maybe this would be the last time I ever saw this van. 

Maybe this would be the last time I ever talked to Scout or Pyro. Maybe this would be the last time I ever saw Mundy. I felt sick in the stomach and I was ready to break down crying. The tears welled up in my eyes. 

“Mundy,” I said. 

“Yeah?”

“Do you ever think about what lies in the afterlife?” I asked.

“No,” he replied. “Why?”

“Well, I was just thinking about it,” I said, turning around to face him. “Maybe heaven exists and we’ll all go there a-and we’ll be together.” I started to cry. 

“Oh Y/n,” Mundy said. He hugged me. I buried my face in his shirt. 

“I don’t wanna die!” I exclaimed. “I wanna live long enough to have kids! I wanna see my grandkids grow up!” Mundy ran his fingers through my hair. He held me tight. It felt comforting. I sniffed and looked up to face him. “Are you worried?” I asked. He smiled.

“Course Oi am,” he replied in a soft tone. “Oi don’t wanna die either. That’s why Oi’m gonna spend the rest of my time with you.” I smiled. 

“Thanks,” I said.

“For what?” he asked.

“For being the best guy I ever met,” I replied. I stood up on my toes and kissed his cheek. Mundy turned bright red, looking away. I chuckled. “Seems the cat got your tongue,” I said. There was a knock on the door. Mundy let go and opened it. Scout held a bucket and pen in his hand.

“Hey,” he said. 

“Hey,” I replied.

“Spy wants us to write the last things we wanna do before we die and put it in this bucket,” he explained. He handed us a card from the bucket and the pen.

“Give us a minute, will ya?” Mundy asked. He walked over to the counter and started writing down his last minute wish. My eyes never wandered over to read his paper. It was a respectable thing to do. “Here,” he said, handing me the pen. “Scout and Oi will be inside,” he said. 

“Okay,” I replied. “I’ll be out in a bit.” Mundy nodded and closed the door. 

So what are you going to write?

Not sure.

What do you wanna do with these three days left?

Spend it with Mundy.

Okay, so that’s the deal then. I started to write down my last request.

What’s it say?

“I wanna spend my time with the man I love most,” I replied.

[yeongwvnhi]

》Troublemaker《

Superpowers AU, College AU, Poly AU

Taglist (send an ask if you want to be added): @twancingyunhoe @biaswreckingfics @donghanies @moonshineboyz @soleilsuhh @trashlord-007

Genre: crack, fluff, angst, suspension, suggestive

Rating: 16+

General Warnings: rituals, lots of fighting, language, injuries, weapons, detailed descriptions of fights and injuries, some mature themes, lots of kissing and teasing

Chapter Specific Warnings: teacher and headmaster being overly rude, cussing

Pairing: The Boyz x fem reader

Synopsis: in a world where superpowers are nothing special and everyone is gifted with some kind of special ability, you and your friends quickly grow tired of it and all the rules. So when one of your friends brings up a certain ritual, with which you can travel into another universe, it sounds like heaven, but you quickly realize it's harder to adapt than you'd like.

Word count: 2.7k

》Next《   》Masterlist《

It's fairly early when you leave your home for college, around 7am something. The air around you is still fairly crisp and cool, but you're not bothered. Others would be shaking if they went outside in just skinny jeans and a simple sweater when it's 0°C outside. 

But you? You're not bothered in the slightest as you calmly walk down the street and towards the giant building. 

It's metallic cover reflects the sunlight, slightly blinding you in the process. It makes you squint and avert your eyes. 

"Y/N!" 

Your head turns in the direction of the call and you see your best friend jogging towards you with a bright grin. "Oh, hey." 

"Good morning!" He beams, way too enthusiastic for your liking at this hour. 

A demonstrative yawn escapes you as you lazily wave at him. "Morn'..." You mumble and wipe the tears out of your eyes which gathered due to your yawn. 

"Aren't you gonna give your bestie a hug?" He pouts and his dimples make an appearance. "I'm disappointed." 

A chuckle escapes you before you turn towards him completely and give him his desired display of affection. 

A happy sigh escapes him as he tightly slings his arms around you. "I'm never letting you go, it's too cold!" He whines when you move to break the hug. 

"Wear warmer clothes then, you buffoon." You mumble, struggling to push him away and ultimately just giving up. 

"Nahh, why would I do that when I have my personal heater right under my nose?" He teases. 

"Shut up and let me go, we have classes soon." You whine and push at his chest again. 

He relents with a high pitched laugh as he watches you stumble back, his arms letting go easier than expected and making you lose your balance for a few seconds. 

"You fucker" You hiss while taking big, fast steps towards your destination. 

"My baby! Don't be mad!" Your friend whines while jogging to match your pace. 

"It's not even 8 yet and the two of you are already having a quarrel." A new voice joins the two of you. 

Startled by the sudden intervention, you whip your head to pinpoint the source and find another guy of your friend group. 

"Sangyeon? Where did you come from?" You ask, eyes moving up to meet his.

"You must have forgotten that I always meet you at this section in the road, tsk." The older one answers and shakes his head. 

"Sorryyyy" You say with a chuckle, "but Changmin here decided to be an ass first thing in the morning! It's his fault" 

"HUH??" The culprit screeches in surprise, "Excuse me??" 

"Be quiet you two, I don't need a headache right before classes." 

"Sorryy" Changmin and you chime in unison, "dad." the former adds and snickers, earning himself a glare from Sangyeon. 

The three of you continue on the rest of the way in silence and you couldn't be more grateful. Your mind is not yet in the right place for any intellectual conversation. 

The enormous college building towers in front of you all as you reach the campus. 

"Ohh look, the others are already here!" Changmin happily points out, proceeding to skip towards said friend group. 

Sangyeon and you exchange an amused glance before also walking towards them. 

"Morning everyone." You wave at the guys and they all greet you back. 

"Y/N my love!" Your other best friend exclaims and jumps to hug you, "I'm so glad you're finally here! Please warm me up, I'm freezing!" 

The other guys laugh at their youngest friend's antics, you included. Nonetheless you proceed to hug him around his middle and make use of your powers. Your skin immediately heats up to a nice and cozy temperature and the guy hums in relief. 

"You're such a baby." You chuckle and pat his broad back affectionately.

"Classes start in about 10 minutes, we can go inside now." 

"Oh, look who decided to show up." Sangyeon teases. 

"What? Why would I show up half an hour before classes?" Said newcomer replies. "I can take all the time I need, unlike you guys~" 

"Stop being arrogant, Hyun." The oldest playfully scolds. 

"Now now, don't fight." Jacob intervenes, voice clearly expressing his worry. 

"Hold on, what class do we have now?" You suddenly realize and look up to meet Sunwoo's eyes. 

"Uhh I'm pretty sure it's chem." He replies, now looking at Younghoon for confirmation. 

"Yeah" he nods. "We should go, it's all the way on the top floor of the building." 

Sunwoo and you groan in unison, totally not thrilled on having to walk up 10 flights of stairs. 

"I actually also have chemistry, but in another course." Jaehyun says, "It's on the same floor though." 

The three of you guys look at your friend with hope. 

"Urgh, fiiine." He groans, already knowing exactly what you were all going to ask of him. 

"Yay!" You beam happily and peel yourself away from Youngjae. "Sorry hun but you gotta get inside quickly to stay warm I guess." 

He grumbles something inaudible and you immediately attach yourself to Jaehyun's arm instead and give him a smile. "You're the best, Hyunnie!" 

He can't help the amused smile to crawl onto his lips. "I know." 

You hear Sunwoo make a gagging sound, prompting you to laugh. "Let's go now." 

"Sure, sure." Jaehyun hums and within a second the four of you are up on the top floor. 

"Thank you~" You happily chime and stand on your tiptoes to press a quick kiss to the man's cheek. Then you turn around, link arms with Sunwoo and Younghoon and drag them into your chemistry classroom with a content smile on your face. 

Both men exchange a glance at that interaction and internally behead Jaehyun for having his useful ability. 

When Sunwoo turns his head to look at the older guy, Jaehyun shows him a priggish smirk and waves before disappearing. 

"He really-" 

"Good morning you three!" Your teacher greets and Sunwoo immediately stiffens, startled by the voice. "Class starts in 5 minutes, find your seats!" 

"Yes ma'am!" The three of you reply and give a quick bow before scurrying to your seats. 

"Miss Im is so scary…" Younghoon shudders and you nod. 

—

Your teacher had given the class an experiment to work on in groups of three. Funnily enough, a student had broken one of the school's bunsen burners, so now your group was without one. 

"Great, just great" Miss Im angrily says under her breath. 

"Miss" You say and raise your hand. She looks at you and nods. "I can use my power instead for fire-" 

"Under no circumstance will you do that!" She immediately shoots down your idea and raises her voice. "What if you set fire to something in here? You could hurt us!" 

You don't know what to say, feeling at a loss for words at her sudden outburst. Sunwoo and Younghoon notice your shaking hands and glare at the teacher. 

"Did you really have to lash out at her like that? She just suggested it!" Sunwoo angrily replies and stands up from his chair, smacking the table. "We all here have been living with our powers ever since we were 5! We have them under control! Y/N would never hurt someone on purpose!" 

Younghoon had hugged you close to calm your anxiety down while everyone just watched and listened to Sunwoo's outburst. 

Then it was quiet for a moment, Miss Im too stunned to say anything back and the rest of the class only agreed with him. 

Sunwoo was quite literally charged, you could see little lightning bolts dancing all over him. 

"Sunwoo…" You quietly say and he looks at you. "It's okay." 

He takes a deep breath and shoots the teacher another sharp glare. 

She clicks her tongue angrily and just ignores this incident, instead opting to not grade your group on this one. 

—

After class ends the three of you quickly make your way downstairs and onto the campus to meet the others. Sunwoo was stubbornly clinging onto your arm with an annoyed pout on his face. 

"Hey Sunwoo." you speak up and nudge him so he looks at you. "Thank you for interfering." 

He gives you a tight-lipped smile and says "No big deal."

"Thank you too Hoonie." you turn to the older guy and give him an affectionate smile which he returns shyly. 

"Oh look, the troublemakers are coming." Someone teases when the three of you proceed on your way towards your friend group. 

You turn to glare at the person, your red eyes flaring dangerously and they immediately look away, visibly flustered. 

"Hey hey, we already heard you guys got in trouble." Jacob says first when you are within hearing range. "What happened? Are you okay?" 

"Don't worry, we're fine." You answer and wave him off, but the way he eyes Sunwoo tells you that's not what he wanted to hear. 

"Miss Im went off on Y/N after she offered to use her powers for the experiment because a burner was missing." Younghoon explains and you feel Sunwoo tighten his group on your arm even further. "A- Sunwoo what's gotten into you?" You exclaim to him and prod at his arm to give you some room. 

"I'm sorry Noona, I'm just still mad at Miss Im." He mumbles and hides his face on your shoulder. 

"Stop being a baby." Juyeon speaks up and pries the younger one from you… well he tries. "Argh, let go already! Chanhee, come help me out!" 

"Wha- Hyung what am I supposed to do??" The younger one replies incredulously. 

"Just help me get this walking taser off of Y/N!" 

You snort at that exclamation and Sunwoo gives Juyeon a pointed look. "Did you really just call me a walking taser?!" 

"So what if I did?" 

"Unbelievable." Chanhee shakes his head, but an amused smile plays at his lips nonetheless. 

Your eyes basically scream 'help me!!' As you look at Youngjae, the youngest out of you all gives you a laugh before nodding. And suddenly Sunwoo's grip on you loosens and you quickly peel yourself away and hide behind the culprit. "Thanks Jae." you snicker against his arm as you peek out to look at a confused Sunwoo. 

"Yah!" He literally screams, making all of you flinch besides Changmin. "Youngjae I swear-" 

"Enough now, kids!" Sangyeon finally steps in and silences Sunwoo quickly. He pouts and crosses his arms in front of his chest. 

You move from behind Youngjae to stand to his left, now in between him and Changmin. 

"Ohh guys!" The latter suddenly speaks up with sparkly eyes and everyone looks at him. "How about we have a sleepover at my house this weekend? We're free next week so we can have some fun together!" 

Everyone quickly makes eye contact with the others. "Sure!" Haknyeon nods and adjusts his choker. "I'm itching to take this thing off, it's really weird to be as close to normal as it can get here." 

You all laugh at that, remembering how he has to wear it due to his powers. His hyperawareness is a very useful power, but also hard to live with, since he gets easily overwhelmed in crowded places. He had someone in his family create that ability dimmer for him so he could live without being constantly overwhelmed. 

"You over there!" 

All of you turn to see who called, finding it to be your headmaster. "Kim Sunwoo and L/N Y/N, come over here." 

You give Youngjae a panicked look and he shoots you one right back. That can't be good. 

The two of you slowly walk towards the man, stopping about a meter in front of him. "Do you know why I came to speak with you?" 

"No, sir." You shake your head, not daring to look into his eyes. Out of the corner of your eyes you see Sunwoo trembling slightly. 

"Well, I came here because Miss Im told me about what happened during her chemistry lesson. Shall I remind you, Miss L/N, that it is strictly prohibited to use your powers on campus grounds, unless they're unable to be deactivated?" 

"N-No, I know that, sir." You reply quietly. "But we were missing a burner, so I thought-" 

"You thought what? That it would be a good idea to use your powers instead and to risk hurting your classmates? Hm?" 

"I'm so-sorry. It won't happen again, sir" 

"And now on to you, Mister Kim." The headmaster turns to Sunwoo instead and you try to calm your racing heart and keep your anxious tears at bay. "You're really cocky for a 2nd year, just raising your voice at a teacher like that AND using your powers in a classroom." 

"Miss Im has started it." Sunwoo replies through gritted teeth, "She could've calmly explained it, but instead she decided to humiliate Y/N Noona in front of the whole class! Was I just supposed to watch?!" 

"Sunwoo-" You hiss, scared for him. 

"Excuse me?" 

"You heard me right, sir." 

"Don't make me call your parents." The much older man threatens. 

"Oh, go ahead then." Sunwoo replies, "I don't care." 

"Sunwoo!" You say with big eyes. "Stop it!" 

"You should listen to your little friend, Mister Kim." The headmaster sneers, "I'll let you off the hook since you never did anything before. You better behave." he clicks his tongue and leaves. 

You grab Sunwoo by the collar and pull him to match your height. "Are you out of your mind?!" 

"Hey hey…" Jacob quickly makes an appearance and gently touches your shoulders with nothing but worry all over his face. "Please calm down Y/N." 

"You idiot, he could have expelled you or something! Don't do stuff like that!" You practically beg him with teary eyes. 

The younger one's eyes soften. "I'm sorry Noona, I won't do it again, but please don't cry." 

Jacob takes a step back and just watches, mostly relieved that you weren't angry and that he wouldn't have to break up a fight. 

"Give me a hug you idiot…" You grumble and wipe your eyes. Sunwoo gives a panicked wheeze, locking eyes with Changmin and Youngjae. They both just wave him off. 

"Okay okay, don't cry." He says and gives in, pulling you close and patting your back. 

The others watch from a bit away, soft smiles on their faces, almost forgetting why you two are in that situation in the first place. 

But then the bell rang, snapping you all out of your thoughts. 

Changmin drags you by your wrist, Chanhee on your other side as they lead the way to your next class. 

"Are you feeling better now, Y/N?" Chanhee softly asks from your left side and you turn to look at him. 

"I feel okay now, thank you for worrying." You reply and flash the taller man a quick smile. 

Changmin intertwined his fingers with yours. It's nothing new, the two of you used to do that ever since you became friends. 

"Chanhee Hyung, where is the literature classroom again?" 

The oldest of you three thinks for a moment and looks at the numbers next to the doors. "It's room 371." 

"Ahh thank you~" Changmin happily replies and you guys make your way into the room. 

—

Chanhee stretches his long limbs after the bell chimed, indicating the end of the class. "Today's lesson was pretty intense, don't you guys think?" 

"Yeah, there was a lot." Changmin frowns a little. "Y/N how were you holding up?" 

Your head shoots up in surprise, caught off guard while packing your stuff. "Uh- It was alright. I understood most of it actually." 

Both men give you weird looks. "You never understand stuff in literature, what happened?" Changmin says with furrowed brows. 

"I think it's because she actually paid attention this time." Chanhee adds with a chuckle, "She looked so concentrated, it was cute." 

You feel your body heating up and avert your eyes. "Whatever, let's go." 

The two men exchange amused glances but don't speak on it any further, opting to just follow you out of the building. 

You didn't expect to run into this particular person when you exited through the large glass doors. 

After all, he got expelled for using his powers on campus and a few other things. 

"Hyunjun?" 

[starstruckmyths]

Steve/Jason Wilkes?

Not sure how they would meet. Maybe a modern day AU? Or in the alternate timeline, our Steve rescues Alt Steve fairly early and Howard introduces them?

Oh my god this is why I love rarepairs. I never would have thought of this!!!

(For the unknowing, Jason Wilkes is a character of the "Agent Carter" series, season 2)

Okay okay so, I think a "Steve Is Rescued Early AU" fits nicely, but for what I wrote a Modern AU could fit just as fine.

As we saw in episode 2.01, he likes to play around with alcohol, and I always thought that was endearing. So, here you go. Jason gives Steve a sip of his latest experiment😌 I hope you enjoy💙

xXx

Various colored liquids bubbled in their containers, softly murmuring their secrets as they slid and slide through the glass. Pumps moved up and down, guiding the liquids to their destination.

"Prepare to be... thunderstruck."

Jason reached out his hand, turning a small tap at the end of a spiraling glass tube, and a bright orange liquid dripped into the transparent beaker beneath it. It wasn't just any orange, it was poison orange. As if he had stolen a poisonous frog from the rainforest, smashed it to a pulp and then poured its essence into his complicated structure of glassware to try and brew magical potions with.

Steve waited patiently, watching as Jason turned the tap off again and then picked up the beaker, taking a quick whiff himself and nodding, clearly pleased with himself, before holding it out to Steve.

"Taste this."

Hesitancy jumped to Steve's mind right away, mixed with a healthy dose of suspicion upon trying to remember what exactly Peggy had told this guy before they met. Something something super soldier something.

He bit his lip, casting his eyes up at Jason as he shifted his weight to his other leg. "Hmm, you aren't using just me as your lab rat because I'm a super soldier, are you?"

Feigning complete and utter shock like he had just been slapped in the face, Jason dropped his jaw and put his hand on his chest, gasping as he still held the green goo. "Steve, how could you even think that?"

Pushing back the urge to roll his eyes, Steve took the beaker from him. No big deal. Jason liked to experiment with things, and none of what was actually in the machine was poisonous (especially not to him), so he figured it would be alright... right?

With a small sigh, Steve lifed the beaker to his mouth and took a sip. He held it on his tongue, trying to work out the taste and the feel of whatever he had just taken.

Oh whoa. It was...

...the most disgusting thing he had ever tasted in his life.

Steve clenched his jaw, straining himself to try and keep a straight face as he hummed something in response, nodding his head a few times as he swallowed the concoction like it was made of razorblades.

"Oh... urmm... mmhmm, delicious."

"It's terrible, isn't it."

Looking quite sheepish, Steve put the beaker back on the table, trying to stay polite by not gagging above the bin with his tongue out. "Uhmmm..."

"Argh! I really thought I had it this time!" Jason exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air. "Orange juice and ethanol, manipulating the oxygen in the manic and succinic acids, tweaking the pH balance..."

He scratched his head, frowning at his experiment as if to will it into telling him what went wrong.

Steve put on a sympathetic expression, nodding along pretending he understood how and why that should have worked. Orange juice and alcohol, not normally quite so bad. He leaned in a little closer.

"Well, we can always go get another drink?" He suggested nonchalantly, "So you can gain some inspiration, of course."

That had his attention.

Leaving the experiment be without a second thoughts, Jason lifted his head, eyebrow slightly quirked and with a look intrigue on his face. "Steve Rogers, are you asking me out?"

Steve blinked innocently. "For science."

"Well, I love science." Jason grinned. "Among other things. Shall we?"

[zoya-nazyalantsov]

Pirates of The True Sea Chapter 1

(pirates of the carribbean inspired zoyalai fic lmao)

Nikolai Lantsov, aka Sturmhond, has a problem. Cursed by the fearsome pirate, Morozova, Nikolai must seek the one treasure that can cast out his demon: The Sun Summoner. 

Zoya Nazyalensky wants power. Aboard Morozova’s ship of extremely questionable morals, she joins him in a quest to search for an object of legends that bring power to all who wield it. 

As Nikolai and Zoya’s search for the mythical Sun Summoner endures, time pressures them both into an uneasy alliance, one that leads to sword fights, betrayal, small science, and… romance? Of course not, that would be ridiculous. 

Ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29546391

“To the gallows with this filthy pirate!” announced the governor who hovered waspishly above the crowd. His bulbous nose and ballooning figure glared down from the balcony to said pirate.

“Privateer, actually,” said Nikolai Lantsov with a tight voice as he struggled against the coarse rope that burned around his neck. Death by hanging was not the way any pirate should go, especially one as respected as Sturmhond. Stormchaser. Prince of the Seas. Demon Prince. He had many names, but that was beside the point. The gallows were no respectable place to die, especially not with a murderous demon trapped inside one’s heart. 

Release me. Nikolai felt the creature stir inside the chambers of his chest, scratching lightly at the sinew and muscle. 

No. He knew that if the monster was released, it would kill everyone in the square. He glanced around quickly, estimating about one hundred people. One hundred people were waiting for him to break like a pathetic little twig. Unfortunately, the monster knew this as well and he felt it grin. His traitorous heart jumped as the claws tightened around it. 

Let me take control and I can save us. I can save you, it said. Nikolai gritted his teeth, ignoring the call of darkness and evil. 

I hate you. At this, the demon smiled. 

I am the pirate and the pirate is me, Sobachka. 

“Any last words, Sturmhond?” growled the executioner. Trying to remain human, Nikolai answered thoughtfully, banishing any indication of a curse out of his mind. He missed the cerulean waters, the taste of fine liquor, and the salty smell of the ship. His undignified week in the cellars had dulled his golden skin and his disguised red hair became almost a reddish gold. Not to mention it left him smelling like old rainwater left to dry in a stable cleaned with manure. It was not one of his finer moments. 

“Got any kvas?” he asked and was silently thankful to hear a few snickers from the crowd. “I’m rather parched.” 

“Argh.” spat the executioner at his feet. Nikolai spotted several gnats and mosquitoes caught in his gnarled peppery beard. “Death to the pirate then,” he said, placing his hand on the lever. Nikolai felt the anticipation of the people and prayed to his Saints. 

I didn’t think it would end like this. Nikolai closed his eyes, waiting for the snap of the lever and the subsequent snap of his neck. 

Suddenly the executioner cried out in pain and a shriek followed from somewhere among the masses. Nikolai’s eyes shot open and he was met with two stormy blue eyes. The figure was hooded, dressed in black and gold, flew across the platform wielding a silver sword. The mysterious savior struck down the executioner with swift ease. Nikolai watched wildly as the townspeople darted like guppies to avoid the falling bodies of soldiers onto the square. He took in a sharp inhale as the feral eyes of the stranger faced him, sword raised over their hooded head. He forced himself not to flinch as the figure sliced the sword over him, severing the rope that suspended him in two. 

Nikolai dropped to his knees, gagging, and felt a small but firm hand grip his shoulder. He was free. The figure jerked him to his feet and thrust a sword into his hand. He grabbed his hat back from a petrified soldier and placed it upon his head. 

“I’ll take that back, thank you,” he said. He took off sprinting along with the figure, boots slapping against the cobblestone street. He set his gaze ahead to the ocean, the only place he’d ever known freedom. The path was clear and straight. 

“You’re coming with me, Sturmhond.” said a smooth, feminine voice from under the veil. Nikolai squinted closer at her robes as she dragged him running through the town. A patch was sewn onto the sleeve: an eclipsed sun. The dreaded symbol of Aleksander Morozova. A mix of fear and disgust rolled through him and he snatched his arm away from his captor. 

“What does Morozova want with me?” he hissed, running towards the docks. He glanced back to find an angry group of soldiers chasing them. “That wretched pirate was the one who got me caught in the first place!” he exclaimed. The figure’s hood fell during their escape, revealing a mass of dark tresses and healthy brown skin. Her bright eyes flashed towards him. 

“Follow me and I will explain”, she said, gesturing to a gargantuan ship leaving the harbor. My ship? Nikolai blinked at the magnificent wooden ship that moved quickly towards the open waters. The crazy woman tracked down my ship. The deck of the Kingfisher called to him like the call of the open sea. He spotted the frantic waves of his crew, shouting and howling at him. 

They raced towards the dock, dodging and deflecting the stray bullets that flew around them. The rotted wood creaked under his feet as he approached the Kingfisher. The woman jumped with effortless strength and grabbed the rope that dangled patiently from the side of the ship. 

“Come aboard, Sturmhond!” cried a scar-faced woman with red hair. Nikolai brightened at the sight of her. Genya. She threw down a second rope and he grabbed a hold of it, pulling himself up. 

“Let this be a lesson to you all,” he shouted triumphantly to the soldiers who gaped at him from the edge of the dock. “No governor alive can ever catch the great Sturmhond!” 

“Curse you, Sturmhond!” shouted the Governor with a fat fist thrust into the air. One curse is enough to deal with, Governor, he thought bitterly. He laughed as he swung himself onto the deck and tipped his hat in the direction of the reddening Governor. He landed gracefully in front of the woman who saved him, face hardening into a mask with ease. 

“Now what to do with you?” he contemplated aloud. “You who wear the colors of Morozova.” The woman faced him defiantly, unbothered at his words. 

“Peace, Sturmhond,” she said. She cast off the black robe, uncovering a weathered blue kefta. Typical. Morozova’s whole crew was made up of people like her. The most powerful grisha flocked to him like how sailors were lured by sirens. He promised them riches and power and worst of all, they always believed him. Nikolai was thankful for his band of grisha that knew the truth. Some had even escaped the clutches of Morozova’s ship, The Merzost, like Genya and David. 

“Stormwitch,”  murmured someone among the crew. 

“Stormwitch indeed,” he echoed, folding his arms. “What is your business in saving me from a most unfortunate fate?” he asked with curiosity. “Not that I’m ungrateful, of course, but I do wonder…” He leaned closer, awaiting her answer. A slight crease formed between his brows upon studying her expression. She seemed bored. Bored? We just escaped flying bullets without a scratch and the woman is bored? 

“I escaped from the pirate Morozova and went to find the greatest pirate in the True Sea. I followed whispers, rumors, stories, all to find that the great Sturmhond is hanging from a noose on some obscure island in the south,” she said with disdain. You have your former captain to thank for that. But of course, he couldn’t say that. One more person who knew about the curse was another person who knew of a weakness he possessed. “Obviously your reputation precedes you. Apologies if I’m a bit disappointed,” she added. Nikolai felt a sense of tension stir within the crew. He saw his friends, Tolya and Tamar, place a cautious hand on their respective weapons. 

“No, no,” he said, forcing an easy smile on his face. “I apologize for not living up to your expectations Miss…” 

“Nazyalensky. Zoya Nazyalensky,” she replied sourly. 

“Miss Nazyalensky. I swear I’ll spend the rest of your stay on this ship making it up to you. Sturmhond guarantee.” he said, throwing in a wink. Zoya rolled her eyes but he didn’t miss the slight lift in the corner of her mouth. Interesting. He walked to the upper deck, her piercing gaze trailing his movements. The wind rustled his red locks as he placed his hand on the wooden steering wheel, painted with chipped gold. “So you’re looking to join my crew I suppose?” 

“Yes,” she said. “Morozova has grown power-hungry and mad. I will serve no evil madman.” She seemed disgusted as she said his name and Nikolai knew how she felt. Maybe he could use that to his advantage. 

“Who said I wasn’t mad, darling?” he joked. His crew laughed along with him. “No worries, we are not evil here.” 

I would say otherwise, said the demon. 

“And what do you have to offer us?” chimed in young Ivan. 

“Yeah!” 

Zoya whipped around towards the crew which recoiled at the movement. They’re scared of her, aren’t they, thought Nikolai. She looked wild, standing in the middle of the ship with her ebony hair whipping in the breeze. A wide berth had formed around her, leaving a large clearing between her and the rest of the crew. 

“What can I offer you?” she said, a small smile on her beautiful face. “The winds belong to me.” she declared, closing her eyes. A gust of air rocked the ship, rustling the creamy white sails. The sailors on deck made sudden grabs for the nearest steady object as dark waves churned around them. Nikolai, however, made a point to stand his ground. He planted his hands at his sides, fingers digging into the fabric of his coat. Zoya lifted off the deck like a saint ascending to the heavens. She opened her eyes, glowing a deep royal blue. “I am the Stormwitch.” Power. The woman was raw power, both literally and figuratively. Nikolai clapped politely when she finished. 

“Thank you for that lovely demonstration, Nazyalensky,” he said, leaning onto the railing of the balcony. “But we’re missing one important question.” He let his words linger in the air for a moment. “It’s perhaps the most important question of all, the one that will determine whether you stay on this ship or not.” He forced his eyes away from Zoya, who looked at him with a sense of utter disbelief. He studied his nails, ignoring the muffled laughs from his crew. 

“Spit it out, Sturmhond,” she said with some annoyance. 

“Why should we trust you?” he asked. 

“You can’t,” she said. Nikolai let out a hearty laugh.

“I’m not sure you’re helping your case,” he said. He narrowed his eyes at the girl, standing in her cerulean robes. 

“I’m simply being honest, Sturmhond,” she said. She smirked slightly as if she knew he’d already decided upon her future with the ship. “An honest pirate is hard to come by these days. And I believe that I am worth my weight in gold.” Saints, she was good. Perhaps it would be interesting to have her aboard. She was a curiosity, a mere person of interest. Yes, that was it. 

“Let me consult with my colleagues,” he said. “Genya, David, Tolya, and Tamar, if you would meet with me here please?” He nudged open a mahogany door behind him that led to the captain’s quarters. The four of his friends followed him inside. 

It was just as he left it. A messy pile of maps was scattered across his simple wooden desk like sand on a beach. He eyed the numerous swords leaning against the wall and picked up his favorite: a silver sword with a violet gemstone embedded into the pommel. It was a gift from a fellow pirate, a much better one than he was. He knew the Wraith was out there somewhere, being a hero to those in need. 

“I say to let her stay,” said Genya, tying back her flaming red curls. “She came to us with a way to get you out of the gallows after we’d been struggling for weeks. Granted, she didn’t reveal herself to us.” Tolya and Tamar nodded, although they exchanged a worried glance. 

“I agree with Genya,” said David while Tamar rolled her eyes. 

“Oh, of course, you do!” she said. “Nikolai, I’m not saying she has to leave, I’m wondering if we can trust her.” Nikolai palmed the sword in his hand, considering her words. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t wondering the same. Zoya Nazyalensky’s sudden appearance and motives were not as she presented them to be, that much was obvious. She could have let him swing for all she cared. And the part about him being the ‘greatest pirate in the True Sea’ was all just flattery, as much as his ego denied it. The woman was playing a game and he wasn’t sure if he wanted to be part of it. 

“Tolya?” he asked. 

“Let her stay,” he said in a low voice. “And if she tries anything she’ll face the consequences.” 

“Alright,” said Nikolai. “Seems like we’ve made our decision.” He replaced the sword back on the wall and turned to the door, bursting through. The crews’ eyes snapped up to him. He made his way down to the lower deck, stopping just in front of Zoya. Her face was fixed into a frown, her lovely blue eyes boring into his. It was as if she dared him to refuse her passage aboard the ship. She possessed the passion, skills, and nerve it took to be a good pirate. And her abilities as a grisha could come in handy on his search for the Sun Summoner now that he was free. Nikolai met her with a confident smile. 

“Well then Nazyalensky,” he said, pausing for dramatic effect. “Welcome aboard the Kingfisher.” He extended a rough scarred hand out from his teal pirate coat. Her hand clasped his and the deal was done. 

[green-eyed-whumpster]

My OC Universe: Rowan 126

Chapter 126 Summary: William learns very quickly that Peter isn’t going to let him get away with talking as much as Rowan did. (Tags: @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi, @much-ado-about-whumping, @abitefullofeverything, @whump-me-all-night-long, @sky-or-something-idfk and @tears-and-lilies)

Trigger Warnings: PTSD whumpee, reference to previous abuse, threats, violence

Rowan was asleep when Peter gently propped open the door and glanced in, he did as he promised and left a bowl by the wall, on top of a flat stone he had pulled from the fireplace that would make sure it hopefully wasn’t cold when he woke up.

He sat with his back against the dining table, facing the creature he swore to watch. Common sense told him the food wasn’t bad, but it felt like sediment crushing between his teeth and mud sliding down his throat. Even looking at William was an effort. Depictions of the King had always been regal and dignified, but looking at him now, he looked like a leper so diseased no one would even risk tossing him a coin.

William woke up before midnight, sadly Peter was beginning to nod off and the sound of a man grunting awake startled him out of any sleep he could have ever hoped to achieve. He watched as William’s head bobbed weakly, face obscured by tendrils of dirty and oily hair, he was waiting for proof that the captive was truly awake.

“Argh…fucking bitch,” The gravelly voice seemed to whisper in the large space of the room and Peter’s eyes narrowed at the clear anger towards Rowan.

“Your head hurt?” He spat. “You feeling a little sore after getting cracked in the skull?” William forced his gaze up and blinked a few times to clear them of the bleary film blocking Peter’s face from him. He certainly thought Rowan sounded weird when he spoke. But of course he recognised the stern face of the hunter that choked him unconscious and knocked him out soon after.

“Oh, fantastic,” He groaned. “You’re back so soon? And I thought Rowan and I could talk more.” He smirked at the furious reaction his comment earned and winced at the effort.

“If I had the stomach I’d torture you the same way you tortured him, but I only kill animals, I don’t abuse them.”

“Oh, how clever, I suppose I’m the animal?” William mocked. “That must be where Rowan got that eloquence from. He sounded like an idiot every time he spoke in my presence.”

“I’m not in the mood to listen to any more of your poison than I have to.” Peter scowled, shaking his head softly. “You keep making noise and I’ll gag you with an ember.”

“I thought you didn’t hurt animals.”

Peter pushed himself to his feet and stepped towards William menacingly, he was fully prepared to silence this creature so he didn’t find himself caught in a conversation again. As he loomed over William, the man realised how utterly defenceless he was and attempted to backpedal.

“All right, all right, I’m sorry.” He exclaimed and Peter stopped. The shadow of firelight flickered over his face as he glowered at William’s tightly bound form, he wanted to continue forward and hurt him but, he couldn’t now that the victim had conceded. Part of him hated how weak he was.

“The next unsolicited sound from your mouth will be the last you utter for a long time,” He promised roughly, turning around to sit down again. “And if you speak to Rowan again, I won’t hesitate to break your jaw.”

That was a threat Alexander had not thought to use against him, and the idea of his teeth cracking apart with the force of whatever blow that would be dealt to him thoroughly intimidated William. He knew the hunter would have an axe lying around somewhere, at the very least. There were no doubt many weapons that could fracture bone within the vicinity, even while waiting for Rowan to bring him water he noticed the cast iron pots and cooking utensils, that would do more than enough damage to him.

“I only asked for some water,” 

While he wouldn’t be quite as brazen as before, he still couldn’t help his attempt to defend himself.

“Then why was he in tears when I came home?” Peter snarled, turning on his heel. “I left him alone with you less than an hour and yet you still managed to upset him so much he managed to knock you unconscious!” He shook his head angrily and scrunched up his nose in distaste. “He’s so innocent he can’t even bear to watch me prepare one of my kills, he’s never killed an animal in his life, and yet you managed to enrage him enough to risk killing you. Don’t you dare try and play innocent with me. Because I don’t play well.” He sat down again in his space and glared at William, eyes flashing with hatred.

“Now not another word. Unless you’re ready to be silenced.”

~ The bedroom door creaked open slowly just after dawn and Rowan poked his head out to glance at the room before him. Peter’s head was balanced back on his shoulder as he slept, his hair tousled around his face and supporting his skull, it didn’t look comfortable, but Rowan was afraid of trying to help him and waking him up. He already felt bad enough for making Peter sleep against the dining table as it was, he didn’t want to risk upsetting him.

Olivia grumbling softly from her place on Rowan’s bed and he glanced over his shoulder to make sure she was all right. She had been really quiet during the night, it was almost as if she suppressed her pain for the sake of Rowan’s wellbeing. She knew that Rowan would get upset if she was in pain.

Rowan slowly shut the door again and rested against it, hugging the bowl of food he found left for him to his chest. It smelled really nice, even though it was beginning to turn cold so he picked up the spoon tucked into the potatoes at the bottom and lifted it to his mouth. He always liked Peter’s food, it wasn’t ever particularly flavoursome, but it was so much nicer than the delicate portions of high-class meals or scraps that the kitchen would begrudgingly give him at the castle.

He had never been one to dream of lavish lifestyles with feather beds and fine wines. Even with William that dream turned to a nightmare. When he was young all he wanted was his father to be kind to him, then when he was on the streets he wished for a safe place to sleep and food, when he was in Lord Borin’s manor he only wanted somewhere to hide, he never wanted anything with Peter, and when he was with the garrison, he just wanted freedom, in whatever form it took. But his entire life all he wanted for his future was somewhere safe to live and a full belly, didn’t matter if the house was small or the food was poor, just some form of consistent safety.

Thinking about how safe he felt now, even with William only one room away from him, Rowan shuddered gently and relaxed against the wall, clutching the bowl tightly. A whole new wave of gratitude swept over him like a gust of wind and he had to push down the needy desire to see Peter and thank him again.

Then the memory of asking for a hug the night before reminded him of the source of his newfound sense of security. He was ashamed that he asked for something like that, that he savoured the feeling of Peter holding him, that he kept mimicking the sensation of Peter’s lips on his skin. He really was a whore. It’s not been more than a few months, and already he’s forgotten how deceptive those touches can be, and already craving more of them. William was right, it doesn’t matter who, he’s always looking for these people to support him.  William, then Cordelia, and now Peter.

Stop it. Please, just stop it. William isn’t right, he’s a bully. Peter’s right, he’s a bully.

Rowan took a deep breath and put down the bowl to run his hands over his hair. He needed another bath, he was dirty. That thought only upset him in another way and he shook it from his skull.

When he managed to clear his head he realised how the ice from outside was creeping into his skin once more and quietly scrambled back into bed, curling up in the residual warmth that the quilts had retained. It was an entertaining thought to imagine William tied against the wall while Rowan was wrapped up in warmth with food and his companion. He wanted to see William be hurt, but he couldn’t bear to risk being caught in another trap.

It was going to be a very long week.

[slimy-vore-bog]

Alright... Here’s the story I’ve been so hesitant to post.

It was written sometime before... hmm... Definitely Taste Test. So it’s old, but I have edited it a tiny bit.

Warnings are... Well... Really really graphic vomiting scene, unwilling prey, painful vore (for the pred) it’s also really just an odd and uncomfortable story. At least for me. I don’t think I would write anything like this again. Also, it’s makes me cringe in more ways than just being uncomfortable. It’s just edgy.

Pred Amity and Prey Luz.

Word Count: 2.3 k

***

"Amity? Is something wrong?" Amity hadn't even noticed she had been staring at Luz, before the human girl spoke up. "You seem a little distracted?"

"I'm fine, Luz," she didn't want to her the truth of how she had been feeling; and not in the romantic way. "I just..." she zoned back out, thinking back to her oh-so-delicious taste. Her mouth flooded with saliva in a matter of seconds. She wished for another taste, but Luz wasn't shrunken down like she was the other time.  Not yet she isn't. The thought echoed in her brain. Could she do that? She had only tried the spell once before...

Luz snapped her out of her thoughts, "You just... what? Amity, you're making me concerned..."

"uh..." Amity look away from her. What to say? What to do? She couldn't tell her the truth... But what else could she do? "I don't know." In reality she really didn't know what was driving her so crazy about her crush's taste. It was just fruity, and she didn't even enjoy fruit that much! Maybe it was the idea of it being her crush, but that didn't make much sense either. Why would that make her so... irresistibly delicious? What made her that way?

"Hey, Amity, you're drooling again..." She could hear the nervousness in her friend's voice. Luz's eyes widened. "It's not because of me, is it?"

Amity looked over to her in shock.

"You have been acting like this ever since I had a look into your mouth." Realization soon filled Luz's eyes. "You... You weren't kidding, when you said you wanted to eat me, were you?"

Amity stayed quiet; not because she didn't want tell Luz, but she couldn't speak. At all. Too many thoughts were running through her head.

"Amity?" Luz called out, and that was when Amity lost control of herself.

She casted the spell, making Luz shrink down. Luz stared in disbelief, before Amity's hand reached out for her, and she ran.

But not long after, her fingers locked around her chest. Luz bit down into her fingers.

Amity lost her grip on her, making her fall onto the table. Hearing Luz's whine, immediately made her snap back to her own self.

"I'm sorry, Luz! I don't know, what happened!"

Luz's eyes were filled with fear. "Turn me back, Amity!"

She hesitated. She wanted to have another taste, but she didn't want to accidently do something she would regret. "Give me a second." She tried to cast the spell, but... it didn't work. What was wrong here? Was she not concentrating hard enough? "Hold on just a moment..." She was starting to get anxious, making it even harder to try. She was not going to betray Luz's trust like this.

"Amity, I'm serious, turn me back!"

"I'm trying, Luz! Give me a moment!" She yelled at her out of panic. She drew in a deep breath, before trying again, but it still didn't work. "Something's wrong!"

She lowered her hand, sitting back down. She ripped into her hair. "I'm sorry, Luz, I really can't figure it out." She pulled her hair harder as the thought of Luz's taste hit her again. I'm not eating her! Her breathing sped up in her panic. She panted with her mouth wide open, feeling her world spinning. Her. Breaths. Were. Too. Short... She felt like vomiting, as she clenched her stomach too tightly. She couldn't breathe. What was happening to her?

She could barely register Luz's voice, even if she could sense she was yelling. She's yelling, she's yelling at me! She cowered at her voice, not really knowing what she was saying. Without even realizing it, she had lost control of her body again.

She slammed her hands down, one on each side of the tiny human, drool dripping from the corners of her wide-open, panting, mouth and off her chin. EAT HER! her brain screamed at her. It was getting harder to disobey with every passing second. She felt her stomach roaring for the human to fill it. Her ears faintly caught Luz yelling her name, but she wasn't in control of herself anymore.

Luz turned around to run, that turned out to be the wrong thing to do. Amity snatched her fingers around Luz's leg, provoked by her running. Luz managed to catch herself on her hands, just before she would have slammed into the table.

Amity dragged her back across the table, like a cat playing with a mouse. She stuffed her into her mouth, as soon as she could. The flavor was almost too overwhelming; yet she still shoved more the human in. She could already feel Luz's hair tickle the back of her throat. She stopped for a moment, pulling her out a little. She had to enjoy her taste longer. The fruity aroma made her drool more than she thought was possible. Luz's clothes were soaked in seconds. She swallowed a mouthful of spit, wanting more of her taste.

There was another faint yell from inside her mouth, as Luz tried to push herself out, but Amity wasn't letting go off her food. Still, she was careful not to chomp down on her. Deep inside her mind; she didn't want to hurt Luz. But still she knew she wasn't quitting, before the girl was in her stomach.

Amity prepared to shove more of Luz in, but as she brought her hands up to her mouth; Luz did the work for her. Her kick, albeit short, shoved her straight forward into her throat. Amity took advantage of it; immediately swallowing her head.

It felt... horrible. The pain from her throat stretching, combined with the need to gag, made tears well up in her eyes. Yet, she wasn't stopping; she swallowed once again, ignoring the pain.

Luz didn't budge at all, but Amity wasn't giving up. She grabbed a hold of the human's legs, feeling them fighting against her fingers, as forcefully shoved her farther down. Swallowing again, the pain was even worse. She had, at least, gotten past her shoulders.

She felt Luz's tiny nails trying to dig into her tongue, but it was only a light tickling to Amity.

She shoved her even deeper in. She tasted good enough for Amity to ignore her pain.

She felt Luz lose her grip on her tongue, as her torso disappeared down her gullet. It was getting much easier to swallow the shrunken girl down.

She tipped her head back; ready for another big swallow, when Luz's voice finally reached her. "AMITY! PLEASE LET ME OUT!" She swallowed, out of surprise, as she snapped back again. She lost her grip, confused for a second, as her throat begged her to swallow her up. She looked down seeing Luz's legs sticking out of her mouth.

Her eyes widened, before she tried to gag her back up, but nothing happened. She grabbed a hold of her and tried desperately to pull her out, but with each pull it felt like her throat was going to rip open. It didn't help that she couldn't breathe at all.

Her lungs were painfully begging for another breath, but, with Luz in her throat, that wasn't going to happen. In her intense panic, her body decided for her that Luz wasn't coming back out. She gulped greedily; feeling Luz descent down her throat. Soon, nothing but her lower legs and feet remained in her mouth.

She felt tears build up in her eyes, as she realized what she had done. Swallowing once more; her tears prickled in her eyes, it was too late to spit her out. Luz's feet were the only thing that hadn't disappeared into her throat yet.

She felt her throat dragging on the last part of Luz, while her head spun from her lack of air. Once again, her body forced her to swallow, yet she wasn't quite able to breathe. Her vision was blurring, mostly from the sense of panic, and she felt lightheaded. She could still sense Luz's body painfully making the descent into her core. Agonizingly slow, and yet, terrifyingly quick.

She swallowed sickly, trying to just get it over with, so she could breathe. Her disgust with herself grew as she felt the lump, she knew was Luz, moving farther down into her. She felt the tears she had been holding back, starting to run down her cheeks.

When she could finally breathe again, her mind was too distraught to even appreciate it. She felt Luz slipping into her belly, filling her up in a way nothing ever had. For a moment, the feeling made her fall back into her trance. She placed a hand over her stomach, licking her lips. It was only when a purr escaped her, she snapped back. NO! You’re getting Luz out right now!

She was trying to vomit, but nothing was coming back up. Nothing other than a mouthful of puke. She got up on her feet, unsure what she was going to do. She had to find somebody to help her get Luz back out.

She heard Luz scream for help.

Again, she tried gagging this time pressing in on her stomach. She felt a little movement, but not nearly enough for her to get back up. Calm down, she told herself. You're not finding a solution while panicking. There had to be some way... magical or not. She heard Luz's voice scream out again. "Amity, let me out!" She felt her kick against her insides. "I don't... I don't want to die!"

Amity felt a new stream of tears coming on. She couldn't speak as she began running to find help. "Somebody, I need help!"

She ran, trying to figure out what was the best course of action. "Luz, I'm sorry!"

It was quiet from her gut; she hoped it was just because she didn't know what to say. Don’t be dead, don’t be dead, don’t be dead- Her mind raced, as she did, before she ran straight into Willow. “Argh!” she exclaimed, before falling onto the floor.

Willow rubbed her own back. “Amity, what’s wrong?”

There was a wild panic in her eyes. “I need help!”

She gave her a quick look up and down. “with what?”

Amity didn’t hesitate to tell her. “I ate Luz, and now I can’t get her back up! Is there some sort of plant that can make me puke?”

There was a spark of anger in Willow eyes, but she seemed to push it down. “Yes, there is, follow me.”

For a second, Amity wondered what made Willow believe her so quickly, but then again… why would she lie about this? She ran after Willow.

Willow shoved something into her hands. The smell alone was enough to make her feel sick. “Chew on it.”

(Graphic vomit scene)

Amity didn’t hesitate to do as she was told. Immediately, her stomach reacted, as she out a nauseating burp. It was followed quickly by another, as a bit of bile came with it. She got down on her knees not wanting Luz to take the drop from her full height. I’ve done enough to hurt her…

She could feel Luz making her way back up into her throat, as even more puke followed with. It was even more painful than it was when she swallowed her. She heaved and gagged, finally feeling it working. She was still begging inside her head for Luz not to be dead.

She hated the fact that there was no movement from the lump rising up her esophagus. Her tears burned as badly as her throat, as she cried. What kind of pain could she have put Luz through? It must have been a hundred times worse than what she was going through.

Slowly, yet surely, Luz was making her way back up. Amity could feel her head reenter her mouth, as her own vomit ran down her mouth covering her uniform. Another hurl of puke came up as more of Luz did too.

She brought her hands up to her mouth, as the first half of Luz was out. She was ready to grab her, when she slipped out.

She felt her throat let go of her, but her body was still not done trying to expel whatever was in it.

(end of graphic scene)

She took a moment to let her body rest, still heaving. But she was finally done puking. She looked down, realizing that Luz didn’t have a single burn on her, but also that she wasn’t conscious.

She was shaking, gently holding Luz. Luz grimaced, waking up in Amity’s hands. “Luz, you’re okay…” It was more to reassure herself than to tell Luz.

She looked over at Willow, before looking back to Amity. She looked like she wanted to say something, but chose not to. Amity carefully put her down on the floor, once again trying to cast the spell that would turn her back. She had realized what had been wrong last time. My mind wasn’t in it…

Luz immediately turned back to her regular size. “I didn’t mean to hurt you,” Amity spoke. Luz still stared at her. “I don’t know what happened.” She knew Luz would never forgive her, but she still needed to apologize. “I’m so sorry…”

Luz stared at her, before backing away. Amity couldn’t look her in the eyes anymore, as she got back up on her feet. She turned around, leaving the room, she was going to have to come back to clean up. And both of the students would need a change of clothes.

 ¨¨

When she had found what she was looking for, Luz and Willow were gone. She decided not to focus on it and just clean up the mess. It was the only way to keep her tears from making a reappearance. Why did I do that?

***

Did the ending with Willow just having a random solution make sense? Probably not... But it’s what I wrote.

I’m not sure I’d want you to have enjoyed this, so... Thanks for reading, I hoped you didn’t enjoy the story? xD But actually thanks for reading!

Have a great day/night! <3

[fifielady]

Bourbon Choco and a Jealous Not-Boyfriend

Rating: T

Ship/s: USUK

Day 1 of @usukweek || Mistake | Canonverse

Note/s: I reaally hope this hit the prompts well-- Have fun reading, you guys!

At least the taste of bourbon on his tongue was comforting.

Canada sighed at his brother's sour attitude. "All I'm saying is that you don't have to look at it if you don't like it. The chocolates aren't even yours so you don't even have a say on mauling them."

"Easy for you to say. You weren't there when some girls blocked the hallway just to give your almost-boyfriend some chocolates. I swear, one of them had this pleased look on her face when she gave hers to Arthur." America turned to scowl at the offending confectionery sitting innocently on the meeting table. Ugh, Arthur didn't even try to hide the chocolates unlike how when America gave him a ship sculpted from dark chocolate, England's favorite flavor, on that year’s Valentines' Day. "I bet it's all melting and totally gross when he opens it."

"With the way you're glaring at it like the desert sun, I'm sure it will. And, stop sulking will you? Other nations are starting to arrive at this meeting you're hosting." Matthew lightly smacked his brother's head, moved his brooding stare in the opposite direction of the chocolates, and pulled him down to sit beside him. America tsk-ed and opened his briefcase to sort out his documents, giving dirty side-glances to Arthur who was bickering with Francis.

America wasn't sulking. He wasn't sulking about England getting three boxes of chocolate from a few people they passed at all. Nope. Nuh-uh. Not. Even. A. Bit. However, America really wished he could fling those very probably delicious sweets out the window in the rooftop of the building. Victorious cackling erupted beside him and he can't help but give England a look expressing his disapproval when he deliberately bragged about his prizes directly on the indignant face of France.

"Bah! That is injustice! Injustice, I say! Why would they even spare those renowned bourbon chocolates for someone like you? You never liked bourbon in even the littlest bit, much less bourbon-flavored chocolates." Francis exclaimed, all the while dramatically pointing a finger to England's direction. America silently agrees though he'd wonder more why anyone would even dare to give England expensive chocolates when he was around. That's just in bad taste.

"Shut up. It would be rude to refuse these after the trouble those girls had just to even find a shop that hasn't run out of these 'limited edition' chocolates." England caressed the packaged gifts as he said this with a wry smile, almost crooning to the box. Beside him, America mock-gagged and vehemently gestured at the appalling look of happiness on England's face to his brother. Canada only rolled his eyes and continued to read his papers, much to America's annoyance of being ignored while he rants about the struggles of his love life.

France harrumphed and looked down at England with disdain. "Ah, of course, I seldom forget how much of a complete gentleman you are to accept such gifts filled with devotion from someone other than your beau-- in front of him, no less! Just look at him, filled with too much melancholy to even give you attention."

Exactly! Even France gets it, you stubborn grandpa! America crossed his arms on the table and hid his face. Why can't England be more perceptive at times like this?! America screamed in frustration on the sleeves of his suit jacket. It was muffled, though, and only Canada heard him. He felt the reassuring pat of his brother on his upper back as he continued to mull over his 'petty' problem.

Yeah, America knows he and England had an 'almost-relationship' label and it wasn't really 'official' official but it was still a relationship! They eat their lunches together most of the time, had dates, visit each other's houses for months at a time. They sleep in the same bed and everything is so frustratingly wonderfully domestic, he might as well slip a ring on each of their fingers and no one will notice except him, and he and England still wouldn't have a definite description of their relationship! ...Well, maybe it was both their fault for still not saying those very-much-should-be-said three words (It's been a century, dammit! When will England finally get off his high horse and confess to him!).

His seat neighbors on his other side were still fighting. Somehow, the conversation went from the chocolates to a completely different subject and both were now insulting one another so loudly people from the other floors could hear them arguing about tablecloths. Was this how Canada felt whenever he visits him and begs him to play the newest horror game he brought with him?  America shook his head. Nah, his brother must've been over-exaggerating.

America started to ignore their conversation until France said something that was maybe too out of line because the slighted man released his very much unimpressive curses (spending too much time with England made America immune and impassive to his sailor's tongue) to redeem his ass and proceeded to pull on France's most-likely designer tie. "--Care to repeat that, you snail-eating no-good-amphibian?!"

Argh! He slammed both of his hands on the meeting table and got everyone's attention. "Okay, everyone, we've got a lot covering today so we should really begin this meeting!" America nodded to Germany to begin his routine of reminding everyone that maiming another nation is strictly not allowed, even if someone used the distributed plastic folders again. And so, the conference began and America continued his silent battle of heatedly glowering at the displeasing display of chocolates that were now placed England's lap. His lap!

After the hours of squabbling and inactive criticism whenever anyone presented, it was finally time for their first break. America watches in his peripheral vision as he yawned, stretching his arms and hearing his spine crack as a ploy to observe his not-really-but-it's-serious-lover check his watch and muttering something about going to the 'loo'. England removed the chocolate boxes from his lap and stood up, placing them on top of his documents as he trudged his way to relieve himself.

America peered at his left-side neighbor, "Psst!" Canada groaned and looked pointedly at him, raising an eyebrow when America tilted his head to the boxes and boxes of chocolate. America looked around the room and noticed the other nations left and only the brothers were left in the meeting room. "Let's eat it."

"... What."

The American already reached for the topmost box and began to unravel the ribbon and tapes. "You gotta eat all these with me. C'mon, Matt, help me out once in a while, okay?"

"Wha--No! Alfred, you do realize Arthur will only get mad--"

"Fuck, look at this man. Hearts? They're giving him heart-shaped chocolates? Screw it, I was planning on eating these but these will look better outside the window." He raised up the appalling thing to Canada's face. "Look at it, it's so damn tacky, ugh."

His brother only scrunched up his nose, irritation rising, "It smells like one of your bourbons-- And put it back. Those aren't yours, and don't waste them!" He shoved the box back to America who was still scrutinizing the chocolates. Suddenly, America's eyes went wide.

"Wait, really?" He took a whiff. And another. "Oh, hey, it does smell like genuine American Bourbon," and just as quick as he held his positive interest on the confectioneries, America deadpanned, "I'm not even gonna let Arthur even see these boxes again."

"God, Alfred! I know you're jealous and all but you've got to stop--"

It was too late, America had begun swallowing down the little pieces of heart-shaped chocolates, never stopping even when a few dropped down onto the carpeted floor of the room. America doesn't care if England yells at him for touching and eating something that wasn't meant for him. He won't even blink if the other would ban him from the bed. In America's eyes, it was England's fault, to begin with. Who deliberately ignores and rejects affectionate cuddling from their not-really-but-actually-lover when they haven't even seen each other personally for three months!

America felt his eyes warm and tore open another box, while still chewing the chocolate in his mouth, against the insistent 'No!'s and 'Al, stop!'s of his brother. Not even Canada tried to understand his woes.

At least the taste of bourbon on his tongue was comforting.

-----

Arthur expected something like the loud chattering of people in a room, a few shouts here and there, and maybe America goaded enough to finally confess to him. And maybe a little bit of broken furniture out of passion. But he didn't expect America trying to squeeze the immortality out of him while looking down with such an adoring expression with those blue eyes of his when he opened the doors to the conference room.

"Aaart, Aarthuuur, Sweetheart," America was nuzzling him like a child does when given their favorite toy. "My sweetheart, darlin', you're heeeeere! I dun'... I wanna, wanna kish-- mwah!" He planted a wet one on England's cheeks, beginning to flush pink to the openly drunk affection from America and from his embarrassment. Giggling much like a child, America proceeded to hug him by the waist and slurred his words on the other's expensive vest. He was leaning against England with such an adorable look on his face. Hmm, this wasn't unwelcome at all.

It wasn't often that America got drunk. From eating alcohol-laced chocolates, at that.

"You should have brought the bourbon chocolates with you," Canada reminded him quite heatedly. "You know how he is when you receive romantic gestures from other people...!"

"Yes, it was my mistake to leave behind sweets where Alfred is sure to find them," England smiled oddly, already dragging America and himself out of the room, he paused but didn't look back, "I'll be sure to properly escort him to the hotel."

He never said when and to which hotel though.

[returnn-of-the-mac]

Fallout 4 companions react to Sole finding out (the hard way) that skunks are still a thing. And now their spray is radioactive, so it’s even worse! Bonus points if the companions were also sprayed.

Radioactive skunks? That’s bad news. I had fun writing this, please enjoy! 😊

FO4 Companions React: Getting Sprayed By a Radioactive Skunk

Sole and their companion were scavenging for junk in the wilderness surrounding Outpost Zimonja when they heard rustling in a nearby bush.

Weapons drawn, the pair walked toward the noise, preparing for an ambush.

When they were just feet away, a small skunk came scurrying out from the bush.

Deacon:

“Aww, It’s kinda cute,” Deacon giggled, “Maybe this thing would make a better pet than Fluffy the deathclaw!”

Despite Sole’s desperate pleas, Deacon crouched in front of the animal and held out his hand.

“Who’s a good boy! You are!” He cooed, “Aren’t you, buddy?”

The annoyed animal turned around and sprayed an unsuspecting and an irritated Sole.

“OH GOD; IT BURNS,” Deacon cried, “I take that back! Fluffy is my one and only!”

Danse:

“Isn’t that a skunk?” Danse asked, confused, “I thought those went extinct shortly after the war.”

Danse began to approach the animal with caution.

“Maybe we should collect a sample of its DNA for Scribe Neriah,” Danse suggested before shaking his head and backing away.

“No,” he revoked, “I am fully aware of what these creatures are capable of. Disturbing it would be foolish.”

Unfortunately, the pair had already encroached on the animal’s territory. The irked skunk turned around and sprayed them.

“This stench is putrid,” Danse coughed, “Retreat— now!”

Piper:

“I’ve seen pictures of those animals in some of the burnt magazines Nat and I have collected over the years. Can’t remember what they’re called though,” Piper thought for a moment, “Ferret?”

The animal turned around and sprayed the unsuspecting reporter.

“What the—urrp,” she she retched, desperately trying to suppress vomit. Unfortunately, the powerful stench overwhelmed Piper, who ran to a nearby bush and hurled.

Maccready:

“What is that thing!?” MacCready gasped, taking a few steps backwards, “Is it some kinda hairy molerat?”

Unfortunately, he and Sole were both unable to avoid the putrid stench emitted from the radioactive mammal.

The pair gagged, tears streaming from both their eyes.

“This is the...worst thing...” MacCready tried to choke out, gagging, “...I have ever...smelled.”

Nick:

“A skunk?” Nick inquired, “I wasn’t aware they still existed. That’s unfortunate.”

The creature tensed up, and the detective immediately sensed the impending spray.

“I think we may have overstayed our welcome...”

The skunk suddenly turned around and sprayed the companions.

“That smell is even more revolting than I remember,” Nick choked, “The rads mixed with it’s natural stench pack a damn punch.”

Curie:

“I believe zat ees a zkunk, non?” Curie asked, “I know zey ‘ave powerul anal glands zat release a ‘orrible oder. We zhould be careful, [Madame/Monsieur].”

Just as she said that, the skunk turned around and sprayed the pair.

“Oh my...!” Curie cried, “Zat ees ze worst stench I ‘ave ever ‘ad ze displeasure of experiencing!”

Strong:

“What this thing, human?” Strong asked. “Taste good?”

Sole begged Strong to leave the animal alone, but the supermutant ignored his friend. He picked up the animal, which prompted it to immediately spray him.

“WHAT THAT STINK!?” Strong cried, violently chucking the skunk into an eternal nap, “SMELL WORSE THAN HUNDRED ROTTING MEATS.”

Hancock:

“Oh shit,” Hancock exclaimed, ”That a skunk?”

Sole nodded and the ghoul chuckled.

“If we could collect some of it’s gas, we could craft a damn powerful chem...I think we may be onto something.”

Sole protested, and Hancock frowned.

“Is the stench really that bad?” the ghouls laughed, “I mean I huff Brahmin shit out of an inhaler. How much worse can it be?”

Before Sole could reply, the skunk turned around and unleashed it’s vile spray upon the two companions.

“Oh God—“ Hancock chocked, “Much worse. This is awful. Bail!”

Preston:

“General, I’ve heard about these creatures, skunks?” the Colonel asked, “We should leave while we can.”

As Sole and Preston began to slowly creep away, the Colonel stepped on a stick.

The snap startled the skunk and it drowned the two companions in it’s gag-inducing stench.

“Oh god—“ Preston coughed, “I’m so sorry. I didn’t see that stick.”

Gage:

“A new species, huh? It’s fur and teeth could be sold for a lotta caps, boss,” Gage laughed.

Sole tried to shut down the idea, but Gage remained firm.

“Easy target,” Gage said, scrutinizing the creature, “Ain’t too big. Don’t see any sharp teeth or big claws or nothin. It’s free fuckin money.”

Gage crept up on the skunk, despite Sole’s desperate pleas.

“Come to daddy,” Gage rasped, “Oh man, we’re gonna be high rollers, boss.”

Just then, the skunk turned around and sprayed the raider in the face.

“MY OTHER FUCKING EYE!!” he screamed before falling backwards, “ARGH. IT SMELLS LIKE SHIT, TOO!”

Ada:

“I am not sure what this creature is, [sir/ma’am], but I can tell you that it is probably dangerous. Our best course of action would be to eliminate it.”

The robot approached the skunk with her electrified arms, and went in for the stun.

Unfortunately, the skunk evaded her attack and unleashed its spray upon Ada and Sole.

“I have detected a sudden jump in radiation, [sir/ma’am],” Ada obliviously announced to a gagging Sole, “Perhaps you should take some Rad X to combat the chemicals.”

Longfellow:

“New game. Wonder if the meat’s any good,” Longfellow stated, raising his rifle.

Before Sole could protest, the Harborman chuckled.

“I’m just kidding ya. I’m no fool,” he stated, “I have a shelf full of encyclopedias of Pre-War game in my cabin.”

Unfortunately, the skunk did not respond well to all of this commotion. It turned around and sprayed Old Longfellow and Sole.

“Blargh!” Longfellow heaved, “Gotta drown out this stench.”

The old man whipped out his trust bottle of whiskey and chugged.

“Nothin a bottle of liquor can’t fix.”

X6-88:

“Careful, [sir/ma’am],” X6 warned, sticking his arm out to prevent Sole from walking any further.

“The Institute’s BioScience division created this creature to use as a weapon,” the Courser explained, “It’s glands have been infused with nuclear material to make its spray radioactive. This one must have escaped.”

Before X6 and Sole could evacuate, however, the skunk turned around and sprayed them.

“Shit! Radation,” the Courser cursed, “That’s not good. We have to get out of here right now, [sir/ma’am].”

Codsworth:

“S-Skunk!” Codsworth gasped, backing into Sole, “I don’t have any tomato soup on me to mask the stench either!”

At that moment, the skunk turned around and sprayed the pair.

“OH MY! The oder is much more offensive than I recall!” Codsworth coughed, “We’re going to need a swimming pool full of tomato soup to eliminate this ghastly stink!”

Cait:

“What do ye suppose that is, darlin?” Cait asked, “Some sorta ugly cat?”

The unprovoked skunk turned around and sprayed the pair.

Sole gagged violently, as Cait watched on in confusion.

“What ye gaggin for? Ye get food poisoning from those molerat chunks I cooked up earlier?”

Sole stared at her in confusion until they were able to recuperate from the attack. They then asked the redhead if she smelled the spray.

“Oh no, I didn’t smell a thing,” Cait cackled, “Me nostrils are clogged to the brim! After all, it is ragweed season and I have allergies!”

[kiminicricket]

Swords and Opals Part 11

A Ruthari fic based pre-show. adventure. friendship. bad-assery. fluff. angst. romance. and of course, Ruthari. What else could you need?

Need to catch up? From the Start Previous Chapter

“Truth or dare!” Tiadrin challenged Runaan. The four of them had had their tea with the instructors this morning and were out in the meadow for their celebratory bonfire. It was still early in the day so they were just relaxing and taking in the beautiful afternoon. 

Runaan rolled his eyes but nevertheless replied. “Dare.” He said. 

“Argh!” Tiadrin cried out in frustration, “Why do you never pick truth! I want to KNOW things!”

Ethari chuckled at his friend. Runaan just raised an eyebrow and Lain was staring at her, a dreamy expression on his face as he played with the braid she had given him. Tiadrin slumped back in defeat.

“I don’t even know what to dare him to do, it’s not like he’s scared of anything.” She muttered. 

“Oh, I know!” Lain perked up and turned to face Runaan, grinning. “I dare you to tell us about your first kiss.”

Tiadrin sat back up. “Ooooh good thinking!”

Runaan glared darkly. “That’s not a dare.”

Lain smiled back smugly. Ethari tried not to look too interested in the answer.

Runaan sighed. “Fine. It was a kid named… I think Miller. Fourth grade. Very forgettable.” He darted a quick glance at Ethari, but returned his attention quickly to the pair grilling him. 

“Oh, what was Miller like?” Tiadrin turned to Lain, “Do we know a Miller?” She turned back to Runaan, “You’re not lying are you?”

Runaan just crossed his arms. “That’s all you get. Lain’s turn.”

Lain grinned lazily. “I’m pretty sure Miller’s family moved to the clan by the North sea.” 

“That’s not what I meant.” Runaan growled. 

“Do you miss him?” Tiadrin asked.

‘What? no. I barely remember. We were kids.” Runaan sighed, “Can we please move on?”

“Fine. Lain? Truth or dare?”

“Dare.”

Tiadrin sat and thought a moment. “Ok, I dare you to go get me a melodaisy.”

Ethari and Runaan raised their eyebrows. 

“That’s it?” Runaan asked.

Tiadrin shrugged. “That’s my favourite flower.” 

Lain got up and loped away. 

Tiadrin turned back to the other two and hissed “Plus he’s still recovering remember. I can’t exactly dare him to do a triple flip over a lake of snapping toads now can I?”

“He’d do it.” Runaan said, shrugging. 

“I know he would which is why I told him to get me a flower.”

“The only reason you told him to get you a flower?” Ethari chimed in with a grin.

 Tiadrin blushed but did not back down. “Maybe not but what of it?”

“Why didn’t you just dare him to kiss you?”

Tiadrin turned bright red and Ethari felt a little bad for his questioning.

“Maybe I will,” she said. 

“He’d do it.” Runaan said again. 

Tiadrin spun to him. “What?”

Runaan shrugged. “He really likes you. I’ve never seen him like this with anyone.” 

“Like what?”

“Like I don’t know, like this,” Runaan gestured helplessly in the direction Lain had gone. 

Tiadrin stared at him with wide eyes, as if unsure how to take this information. Runaan frowned and stood up. 

“I’m tired of this game, I’m going to get some firewood.”

“Need a hand?” Ethari offered.

Runaan shook his head. “Thanks, I’m ok.”

He walked off into the forest and Tiadrin turned her wide eyes to Ethari. “Do you think he’s right?” There was a charming blush on her cheek and Ethari smiled.

“He knows Lain the best. It’s very possible.”

Tiadrin smiled in the direction Lain had gone.

***

“That’s not flirting dude.”

“What are you talking about? I walked next to him the whole way here! I sat next to him in that stupid truth or dare game. What else do you want from me?”

Lain shook his head, almost in defeat. “How are you so dense about this? You have to show affection not just respect or friendliness.”

Runaan frowned. “How do you do that?”

“Well for starters, when he offers to help you with the firewood, you let him.”

Runaan’s frown deepened, “But I didn’t need help with the firewood.”

“Its not about the firewood” Lain took a deep breath. “It’s about spending time together. Getting to know each other. You like this guy yes?”

Runaan bit his lip and nodded. 

“Well you do little things. Compliment him, not just his work, but him. Spend a lot of time together. Find out his favourite colour and wear it.”

“Is that why you are wearing your only green tunic for the third time this week?”

Lain grinned, “Now you’re getting it.”

“You need to get some more clothes. You are going to repulse her with your stench.”

Lain sniffed at his tunic and pulled a face. “You might be right about that. Can we stop by the creek on the way back?”

“I don’t think the creeks going to be much help at this point. Plus, you haven’t even found this flower yet.”

Lain turned and surveyed the field. There was no music coming from any of the flowers. He stooped down and plucked one from a group. 

“There, got the flower, you’ve got your firewood, let’s get back!”

“I don’t think that’s a-”

“I know, but they’re not singing at the moment so I can’t tell. It’s pretty enough right?”

Runaan eyed the yellow petals with small pink fluffy balls coming off stems in the middle. “It looks lovely. I’m sure she’ll love it.”

Lain grinned and his expression went dreamy. Runaan shook his head and started leading the way back to the others.

***

After a quick freshening up at the creek, Lain and Runaan made it back to the others in short order. Tiadrin and Ethari rose when they saw them approaching. Lain bowed low, presenting the flower to Tiadrin, who laughed. Lain looked up.

“What is it?” 

“That’s not a melodaisy.” Tiadrin giggled. 

Lain looked at the flower a little helplessly. “None of them were singing, I couldn’t tell. What is it?”

“Take a sniff,” Tiadrin suggested. 

Lain cautiously sniffed the flower, which exploded a cloud of gas into his face. 

Tiadrin and Ethari laughed and even Runaan was wearing a grin as Lain gagged and coughed at the stench of the flower. So much for freshening up. 

“Eugh. Why is that even a thing?” He threw the flower away.

“I don’t know, but that was better than actually getting a melodaisy!” Tiadrin wiped away a tear of laughter and reached up to Lain’s shoulder.

“You made a friend though,” she grabbed the adoraburr who purred and chirped, bouncing in her hand. 

Lain raised an eyebrow at the small creature but couldn’t help but smile as Tiadrin cooed and petted it. 

Ethari turned to help Runaan finish building the bonfire, leaning back in satisfaction when it lit, flames dancing and letting sparks fly high into the sky. 

“Full moon tonight.” Runaan mentioned, staring at the sparks as they floated upwards.

“You know what that means,” Lain came up behind them, swinging an arm each around Runaan and Ethari, who glanced at him questioningly. 

“Dancing!” Lain let out a howl up to the moon, rising in the dark sky and started dancing around the fire, grabbing Tiadrin’s hands as he passed her and drawing her into the dance. They laughed and twirled going the full circle around the fire. Tiadrin grabbed Ethari’s hand on their next pass. Unwilling to be drawn in alone, Ethari reached out and grabbed Runaan’s hand, dragging him into the dance as well. The four of them danced and sang, swayed and twirled as the flames danced with them, reaching into the sky.

About an hour later the four collapsed into a laughing heap, having exhausted themselves in the dance. 

“I’m starving!” Tiadrin exclaimed, rummaging through her pack to see if they had brought any food.  

“Me too!” Lain agreed. Tiadrin pulled out a handful of nuts. She and Lain looked disappointed to say the least. 

“Did we not think to bring anything?” Lain looked around at the others. Ethari shrugged and Runaan just raised his eyebrows. Lain threw a stick at Runaan. “Go catch us some dinner.”

Runaan frowned. “Why me?”

Lain flopped back dramatically. “I’m still recovering. That’s why.”

“Also, you are the only one who brought a weapon.” Tiadrin chimed in with an impish grin on her face. 

“Uh, I actually brought one too.” Ethari mentioned. 

“So go together then. More chance of a good meal that way!” Lain sat up and made big eyes at Runaan who flushed and looked away. He glanced over at Ethari who was grinning, a little bashful.

“I’d probably just mess things up, but if you need a hand I’m happy to help?” He said, his expression open yet hesitant. 

Runaan glanced over at Lain one more time. Lain gestured encouragingly. Nodding towards Ethari Runaan stood. 

“Let’s go then.”

Ethari stood up quickly and fumbled with the small bow he had brought. He quickly fell into line behind Runaan, waving to the other two who grinned conspiratorially as they waved back. Ethari felt a moment of unease before turning and following Runaan into the forest.  

The pair trekked silently through the woods, coming to the nearby stream. They paused for a moment on the bank. 

“This is a good spot.” Runaan whispered. Ethari glanced around, not seeing any game. Runaan put a hand on his shoulder and pointed to the water. “Look.”

Ethari watched for a moment and sure enough he could soon see swarms of bioluminescent fish swimming through the stream. 

“Oh they’re beautiful!” He breathed, kneeling down to get a better look. 

“Great taste too!” Runaan said, already notching an arrow. Ethari quickly backed out of the way and watched as Runaan speared three fish in a single shot, sending the others scattering throughout the water. Runaan glanced at Ethari before wading into the stream to collect his catch. 

“Good shot!” Ethari said when he returned. Runaan nodded toward him. 

“Your turn.”

“Oh, uh, I mean sure.” Ethari grabbed his bow and notched his own arrow, taking aim at the school of fish that was slowly regathering.

“You normally shoot like that?” Runaan asked. 

Ethari’s gaze shot up to him. “Like what?” His bow drooped toward the ground.  

Runaan had a gentle smile on his face. He pushed off of the tree he had been leaning against and approached until he was standing behind Ethari. 

“Take your aim.” 

“What are you doing?” Ethari asked, every sense suddenly very aware of the body standing so close behind him.

“I’m helping. Take your aim.” Runaan’s voice was patient and Ethari tried to relax, pulling his bow back up and aiming towards the fish once more. He waited for Runaan’s next instruction, and nearly jumped when he felt a pair of hands on his shoulders, pushing down gently.

“Your shoulders are up around your ears. You need to relax them.” Runaan chuckled. 

Easier said than done at the moment. Every one of Ethari’s senses was on high alert. Still, Ethari took a deep breath and managed to lower his shoulders. The gentle pressure of Runaan’s hands remained. 

“Take a wider stance. You’ll be better balanced.” One of Runaan’s feet nudged one of Ethari’s until he was standing with his feet about shoulder width apart. 

“Good, now, steady with this hand.” One of Runaan’s hands came off his shoulders as one arm came out to steady Ethari’s bow hand. 

“Pull back.” 

Ethari pulled the arrow back.

“Both eyes open, watch your target. See how they are moving.” 

The glowing fish came back into focus. And Ethari watched for a moment as they darted through the water.

“Breathe out and release.” 

Ethari released the arrow and watched as it speared two fish. He turned to Runaan, an exhilarated grin on his face to see a matching one on Runaan’s. He was caught in Runaan’s gaze for a moment. Was it just the moonlight or was one of Runaan’s eyes ever so slightly darker than the other? Ethari shook himself a little and took a step back. He turned to wade into the stream to collect his catch.

“We better catch at least three more, Lain is likely to eat half of what we’ve caught by himself.” Runaan commented, staring at their small pile of fish as Ethari made his way back to shore. 

“Probably a good plan. Tiadrin’s an eater as well.” Ethari grinned, “I’m also pretty hungry.”

Runaan smiled wryly, “Me too.”

They both took up their bows once more.

Part 12 now up!

[thejoeisthejoe]

Greatest Car Chase Ever

@getacluedrew is probably going to shoot me or throw something at me, but it’s almost 2am and I’m not sleepy ... I’m posting crap, may as well post our awesome amazing giant ass cross over that we wrote in college together. 

Episode: Hollywood Phantom Guest Stars: The Outsiders Original Characters: Kiba @getacluedrew and Sarah (me!)  Plot - Joe's been kidnapped and an awesome car chase follows.

This is probably going to be mary sue as hell but it was written this way on purpose. The goal is to rescue Joe. 

I promise, it’s worth it. It’s fucking hilarious. 

She woke up on the cold ground feeling her elbows burn from being dropped onto the pavement. Then she looked around and saw she was alone. "Joe?" Slowly she stood up and glanced around nervously. "Joe are you ok?" 

Silence answered her and she felt tears stinging in her eyes. "Oh god…." She began running back towards the hotel hoping she was freaking out about nothing. Sweat ran down her face as she realized the potential of something actually happening to Joe.  

This wasn't like the books, this was really happening.  

This was reality. 

The hotel came into sight and tears ran down her cheeks. She wiped them away with embarrassment as she walked towards the entrance. The bellhop opened the door for her and she tried to straighten her shirt as much as possible. Then she caught her reflection in one of the windows. She sighed and gave up trying to make her self look presentable. 

"Um, sir?  We have a problem! I need to speak to Nancy Drew or Frank Hardy as soon as possible, do you know where they could be?"

"They are in a meeting with the Lieutenant about the situation, is it urgent?"

Her green eyes widened and she gave him a frustrated look. Not wishing to make her cry he walked out from behind the desk and took her by the arm. "Now, now, everything will be alright. Come, I'll show you the room." 

"Thank you," she whispered. 

When she got closer, she realized that she'd have to tell Frank his brother was missing - or she thought that was what had happened. So far he wasn't here, but if he were here, he'd be with her reassuring her that everything was ok.  Her mask she'd been hiding behind broke at the entrance to the room. 

The desk clerk opened the door  and as 

Sarah stood in the doorway she was unable to make eye contact with Frank.

 "Nancy…," Sarah whispered.

"Sarah? Are you alright? You look like you were in a fight?" exclaimed Nancy.

 Frank was up quickly and put his arm around her shoulders, comfortingly.  "Are you hurt?"

Sarah felt another presence appear behind Frank.  She could only shake her head slowly trying not break down. "Sarah, where is Joe?" 

That did it! 

The flood gates opened and she began sobbing, "He's not here? Oh God, they got him." 

"Who?" 

"The man…the person….I don't know. I woke up on the pavement and Joe wasn't there. I was hoping he'd be here…Oh Frank, I'm so sorry!!" 

"It'll be alright, Sarah, it will be." Nancy reached out and pulled her close. "Don't worry, right Frank?" 

A slight nudge in the side made Frank jump slightly and respond with "Yeh, of course…" 

*~*

 "I think we're lost." 

"Gimme the map!" 

Kiba and the boys were driving to meet Sarah at the hotel, it was dark around 8 pm now and seven people in one red Chevy was not going well. 

Darry strained his eyes trying to focus on the road in front of him. He could see the red lights of another car, meanwhile the argument over the directions behind him ensued. 

Darry slowed the vehicle down realizing it was a squad car. He watched the car lights letting his mind drift to the conversation. Then it faded when he noticed something strange. 

"So where are we?" 

"We're here." Kiba sighed surrendering the map to her companions. Maps never were her forte. 

"Hey," Darry said, pointing still keeping his hands on the steering wheel. "There's someone in that trunk." 

The conversation ceased and Soda Pop leaned over to the dashboard of the truck to see. Sure enough, the trunk wobbled a little and someone's face came into view. "Is..is that...?" He looked, "Isn't that Joe Hardy?" 

Kiba pushed past Two Bit and Steve who were sitting on the floor boards. She leaned between the two front seats to see and her eyes widened. "Oh my God, it is! It's Joe!" 

Everyone bolted up. 

"Drive, Darry, DRIVE!" She shouted shaking his shoulder. Darry punched the accelerator and the chevy took off. 

*~*

His eyes painfully opened and he realized with discomfort that one, he was moving and two he was tied up. He was still groggy from whatever had knocked him out as he tried to figure out where exactly he was and why he was moving. 

Then his mind went back to Sarah, was she in here as well? No this place was to small for both of them to be in here.  Then a car horn and shouting was heard out side, teenagers on a drive? Wait…a drive? He was tied up in a trunk?

Terrific. 

Slowly he maneuvered to where his hands were at the end of the car. If he was right, there should be a way to get out.  His fingers grabbed the latch type thing and he pushed. Out of no where the top flipped open and the wind was rushing through his hair. He had to get out of here, alive and find Sarah. 

The bright lights of the teens car was beginning to annoy him, if only he could get their attention.  Then the car he was in bumped up and he was able to turn his head around. Behind the bright lights he saw Kiba in the head space between the two seats. 

Kiba was Sarah's friend, he was saved. 

Now he just had to find a way to get out of here with out killing himself. He leaned forwards and twisted to where he was laying long ways with his head on the wheel covering. Dizzyness was still taking him for an entire different ride of his own. 

Then he heard his father and his brother's voices in his head. 

"Just stay calm."

"There is always a way out." 

Easy for them to say, he said to himself. Ok, I can do this. Another bump came and he felt his gag loosen and the string around his ankles got caught on something at the other end of the trunk and this time Joe yanked hard with all of his might. Finally the string snapped and his legs were free. 

Next he got on his knees steadying his back up against the popped trunk hoping another bump wouldn't send him flying out of the trunk. He tried to hurry and began rubbing his wrist bands against the corner of the trunk. 

After they got weaker Joe tried to pull them apart. His third time trying the car he was in went around a steep turn and he was thrown to the opposite side flat on his face. He lay there for a few seconds feeling the throbbing of his head from the impact then he pulled one more time.  They broke and he pushed himself up slightly. He undid his gag and coughed up the dust. 

Now what? 

*~*

In the meeting room Sarah had somewhat calmed down. She was sitting beside Nancy who was holding her hands tightly in her own. Frank was pacing the tiny room as he worried about his brother. 

Finally Nancy spoke up, "Lt, you don’t understand, Joe could be seriously injured and if we don't act now he might not get the help he needs!" 

Frank was speechless as what Nancy said swarmed around in his head, she was right. He watched as tears began streaming down Sarah's face. 

"Miss Drew, we have been over this there is nothing out of the ordinary, I'm sure the boys just lost and is on his way home. Either that or it's a practical joke!" 

"Practical joke?" Nancy exclaimed fuming. Before she could offer a rebuttal the desk clerk came in. 

"Um, excuse me, Miss Drew you have a call. It sounds urgent. You can take it here." He said pointing to the phone on the desk. 

Nancy nodded towards the LT and he pressed speaker phone. "Hello?"

"Nancy?"

"Kiba!?!" 

"Nancy, we found Joe he's been kidnapped in the back of a trunk of a squad car. We.."

"We're in hot pursuit! We're in hot pursuit!" 

"Two Bit give me back my phone! ARGH! We're on a one way street in the mountains. Get the cops! We're on Route 95 west. We'll follow 'em for as long as we can but they've caught on! You'd better - ahhh! JUST GET DOWN HERE!" 

"Kiba, how does Joe look?" Sarah exclaimed jumping from her seat. 

  "He's untied but he looks slightly…"

"He looks drunk."

"Shut up, Steve." 

"I'm just saying." 

"Shut up! Anyway, yeh route 95 west! Hurry! It's getting' pretty tight around here." Nancy turned back to the speaker phone, "Alright, we're on our way!" 

*click*

"Route 95? That's the worst road out there and in the dark." 

Sarah and Nancy watched as Frank's eyes widened with fear and he ran out. They got up and ran after him. "Frank, let us come with you." 

"No."

"Why not?! You can't take care of him all by yourself!" 

"There is no way I need two more people to worry about."

"Two people to worry about? We'll see about that!" 

"Look, Nancy just take the van's keys. I'm taking the dirt bike so maybe I can catch up faster. Follow carefully."

Nancy sighed and nodded. 

*~*

Joe faintly heard the sound of a motorcycle coming their way. Great. How many other people were going to join this crazy chase? He leaned over the side of the trunk to look to his left and see a drop of pure darkness below him. 

His mind reeled as he realized he was on a one lane road, in a trunk, going up a mountain. 

*~*

 The squad car swerved dangerously around the ever tightening curves as the red Chevrolet kept close behind it. Darry jerked the wheel, rocks skidding and dust flying then punched the accelerator and bumped the car trying to make it stop. 

However with the sheer rock face on one side and the guard rails next to the 100ft drop off made this stunt almost suicidal but there was no other way. He pressed the gas again ready to ram the squad car again but the squad car veered around another tight curve just before he could. 

"Shit!" Darry muttered jerking the wheel hand over hand turning the car. The tires squealed as rubber burned, the car grazing the guard rail as they skidded around the curve. 

Kiba screamed and the boys hollered as the truck tipped then revved up again.

"I think I'm gunna be sick," Ponyboy gurgled, cupping his hand over his mouth. 

"Don't you dare throw up in this car Ponyboy Curtis, don't you dare!" Steve ordered. 

Pony burped hunching over, then opened the car door only to gaze down at a sheer drop. His eyes widened and he felt someone grab his shirt then pull him back into the car and shut the door just before they rounded another curve. 

"What the hell is the matter with you?" But before Dallas could finish the car jolted and the Chevrolet slammed the squad car again. 

*~*

Frank geared the bike to go as fast as he could get it. He had to reach his brother before something happened, especially if Joe was as bad off as they said he was. 'He looks drunk'. That probably meant Joe was just slightly conscious with a possible concussion, he had to get Joe out of here. He slowly reached up and pressed the side of his helmet. His built in radio turned on. "Nancy can you read me?" 

"We read you Frank." 

"Call back down to the hotel and ask them to have medics sent up here."

"Already done, Frank." Sarah's voice answered a little stronger than he'd expected. "Just get him out of there alive."

"I will, Sarah, he'll be fine." Then he neared the next turn and saw the red chevy. Then he said "Call Kiba." He heard a dialing sound as his helmet's phone dialed Kiba's number. 

"Yes?" 

"Kiba, there is a truck safety stop not one mile away from here, see if whoever is driving can push the car into there. Make sure not to hurt Joe. He sounds already beat up."

"Darry.. is ….driving, Frank…. we're…. fine. Of course….. I ….wouldn't."

"I never said you would," Frank replied telling Kiba exactly what she was thinking. 

"They wouldn't either. They don’t want to face Sarah's wrath."

"Oh and let your friends know, once Joe is safe-" A smile crossed Frank's lips. "They can beat the crap out of the bad guys. Just keep 'em alive."

A round of cheers were heard and Kiba laughed manically, "Don't worry Frank they've done this before! And yes that is a good thing." She answered for him knowing he was puzzling over that fact. 

Frank held back and let the car do its work. "Just hang in there, little brother. We're coming." 

*~*

The cars bumped into each other waking Joe up slightly from his pained half coherent state. Why were people running into them? 

The next two bumps weren't as horrible as the next one. The fourth ram sent Joe backwards into the car, his head cracking against it. He slumped forward unconscious.  

*~*

"What did Frank want?"

Kiba grinned, "Frank says we can beat the crud out of the kidnappers once we save Joe!" 

"Hell to the yes!" Two Bit exclaimed. 

"I could go for that!" Dallas agreed. 

"Ok, boys, lets get these suckers!" Kiba said that evil crazy glint in her eyes, a maniacal grin slithered across her face. 

Darry pressed the accelerator and rammed the car, HARD! The squad car was no match for the Chevy's greaser power. All of a sudden. 

BANG! BANG! 

"Holy Hell, they're shooting at us!" Soda exclaimed as a bullet ricocheted off the top of the car. 

Two Bit nudged Johnny aside and leaned his head out the window. "hey give us back our friend you mother-" He ducked back inside just as bullets went flying by. 

"Two can play at this game." Dally muttered. Then he pulled out his 45 and jammed the cartridge in. Leaning out the window and began shooting. 

The squad car swerved, then Soda had a brilliant idea, "Aim for the tires Dallas! Aim for the tires!" 

~*~

BANG! BANG! 

Frank's eyes widened as he realized he was getting shot at. His eyes caught sight of a dirt path leading up the mountain, probably the hiking trail. He veered off on to it and began to climb the mountain dodging trees and other things in the way. 

Finally the forest cleared and he saw a drop. He pushed his foot down on the accelerator and hoped for the best. 

*~*

"Um…Kiba.."

"Kind of busy here!"

"I didn't think Motorcycles could fly.."

"What are you talking about?" 

Silently  pointed up above them as the motorcycle grew louder. There was a loud crash on the hood of the car and then Frank rolled down their windshield and out in front of them. 

"Holy," Kiba began. 

"Shit." Johnny finished. 

"That was AWESOME!" Two Bit shouted.

"I think I'm gunna be sick," Ponyboy whispered. 

*~*

Dallas squinted one eye, "Keep her steady, Darry!" He called as Kiba gripped his brown leather jacket so he wouldn't fall out the window. Darry gritted his teeth as they wound down the road, his eyes totally focused on the car in front of them as he tried to steady the car. 

A straight away appeared just ahead, Dallas' fingers twitched on the trigger. "Not yet, not yet…" Kiba muttered to her self."

*~*

The next time Joe woke up he heard gun shots. Wait, Gunshots? He opened his eyes now curious to know why and HOW exactly these guys had gotten guns. 

Frank looked up and saw Joe was moving again.  "JOE! NEXT TURN JUMP OUT!"

Was Frank crazy? This car was going at least 50 miles per hour. There was no way he'd survive.

"JUST TRUST ME JOE!" 

 His brother had never let him down before. Joe took a deep breath and got prepared. His head was still reeling but he knew he could do this.

"Now Dallas! NOW FIRE!" Kiba shouted. 

"That ought to slow him down!" Steve said trying to stand up so he could see. 

The one aimed shot pierced the right tire. The car swerved and slowed down just enough for Joe to jump out.  

 The next turn came and Joe jumped landing in the dirt rolling far away from the road. At first was afraid he would do down the steep cliff but then he realized he was rolling the opposite way.  The last thought he had was "Frank, that hurt." 

*~*

Frank slowed down his bike and veered off into the emergency landing watching anxiously as his brother weakly jumped out and landed in a heap of limbs near the mountain side. "Joe?" The bike screeched to a stop and Frank threw his helmet off running towards his younger brother.  "Joe, answer me." 

The red chevy pulled over for a split second, "Frank, is Joe ok?" Soda asked hanging out the window. 

"He's fine, keep going! I've called the cops, they said keep going up the mountain and they'll cut you off." 

"You got it!" 

The car sped off and carefully Frank knelt down and turned his brother down over onto his back. Nothing looked to seriously injured, they'd been lucky.  Slowly Joe's face contorted in pain as he came back to reality. "Frank," He croaked. 

"Yeh, it's alright. You're safe!" 

Joe relaxed into the ground this time in a more painful state of unconsciousness. Frank busied himself with getting the bleeding to stop on Joe's arm. 

[prurientpuddlejumper]

Runner, a Todd the Wraith x Reader smutfic [18+]

UMMMM what can I say about this? I’ve been reading a lot of slasher x reader smut lately, and I’m rather into the trope where they “hunt” their s/o but instead of murdering them they do sex >_> 

So. 

Here’s that. But with Todd. 

You are pulled from sleep by a deep voice that echoes in both your mind and your ears at once. A wraith voice.

“Now this is remarkably unwise,” it says.

You slowly blink open your eyes. In the low firelight of the cave you’ve called home for all of a day, you see him—long straggly white hair and a single tuft of beard. The left half of his face is hidden in shadow, but you already recognize which one this is. The star tattoo. Out of all the hunters who have pursued you, he was the best at evading your traps, and always seemed closest behind, yet somehow he always let you slip away. At first, dozens of wraith would show up on whatever planet you lingered on too long. Then it was just him. Always just him.

In a clawed hand, he holds up the device used to track your subspace transmitter. A blinking green dot represents your life. “Staying in one place will get you killed. I thought you were more clever than that.”

You grunt lazily and pull your blanket up over your chin. The wraith stiffens sharply, taken aback at your nonchalance.

“You should be running now,” he warns.

You give a heavy sigh, and sit up on your elbows. “I don’t feel like it.”

“You don’t feel like it? Do you wish to die?”

“Maybe,” you breathe.

His face falls.

“I’m just so tired. All I want is to get a full night’s sleep again. Just once. My head is always aching, and I’m always looking over my shoulders. I’m tired. I just want to rest again. If that means I have to die, I don’t care anymore.”

He growls. “How can you give up so easily?! You’ve been such an entertaining hunt—always outwitting us, out-fighting us despite great disadvantage, coming up with the most elegant plans. I admit I have even come to admire you, for a human. The chase cannot end with an anti-climax. You must fight for your life!”

“You already took my life away when you made me a runner! Sorry, but I don’t care if you’re disappointed. Anyway, I’m not convinced you are going to kill me. The wraith had the chance to kill me when they first culled my village. Instead, they implanted this tracking device in my spine and set me free. So why kill me now?”

“Because that is the game. And if you do not run, there is no game. Then your usefulness has ended.” He steps toward you, feeding hand raised in threat. You’re not afraid. You don’t feel much of anything anymore.

“So be it.” You defiantly lock onto his yellow slit eyes. “If you want your entertainment to be over, go ahead and kill me. But I’m not going to run again until I’ve had some rest.”

With a snarl, he sets his hand on your chest. The feeding slit quivers against your skin, reading it, bonding to it. You wince as it draws little pricks of blood making its connection, and squeeze your eyes shut, waiting for the end. You expect the pain to be sudden and violent as the life is sucked out of your body, leaving you a shriveled, grey husk. But the pain doesn’t come, beyond the initial incision, which feels no worse than a scraped knee.

You open your eyes. He is leaning over you, his own eyes closed in thought, half a scowl turning down the corners of his lips. His eyes snap open and lock on yours. Finally, you feel something from his feeding hand, but it’s not pain. It’s more like… the opposite of pain—a bright, blinding light spreading out through your chest, warming your veins, like a hot cup of tea in the morning at your old home, in your own village, before the wraith came. Your headache is gone.

He disconnects from you, and even the drops of blood he made on your chest seem to heal magically as he withdraws.

“Wh-what was that?”

“The gift of life,” he smiles. “Just a taste. Enough to help you feel like yourself again.”

You do. You can’t remember the last time you felt okay—like you could smile, or laugh, or paint a picture. You almost want to grab a rock off the floor and start etching scribbles onto the walls.

“But, I don’t understand,” you whisper breathlessly.

He brushes a strand of your hair that had fallen out of place. “Perhaps… I am not ready to see you dead yet.” He stands, and turns to leave. Before he departs, he glances back over to your makeshift bed. “Sleep well. We will meet again soon.”

***

Your blood burns in your veins as you run all-out, lungs heaving like bellows. You hear the pounding of your heart even over the pounding of your footfalls on the forest floor. You leap over a fallen log, but miscalculate in the dusky twilight—your foot slips on the bark, and you come crashing to the ground, scraping your elbows on a pile of sticks.

There’s no time to wince or catch your breath. As you pick yourself up, a glance over your shoulder tells you the wraith is close behind.

Just a little farther.

A blue streak of stunner blast sails over your head, urging you onward, ducking behind trees and bramble to keep him from getting a clean shot. You race through a small clearing with a leaf-covered floor, and just dart out the other side when you hear it—SSHHWIK!

“Argh!!” the wraith cries out, swept off his feet and suspended upside down after triggering your spring snare.

You saunter back into the clearing, victorious, and can’t help but snicker at his appearance. His arms and hair dangle below his head, a few feet off the ground, and the long tails of his dark leather coat have fallen over him, exposing a sliver of green-hued belly that you’re very tempted to tickle.

“Well, well, well,” you taunt, circling him. “Looks like somebody made the mistake of chasing me through an area I’ve had enough time to trap. Didn’t your little tracking device warn you I’d been through this way? How unfitting a commander to make such an obvious blunder.”

He growls sulkily at you. “Yes, yes, well done. Now cut me down.”

“I don’t know. Such humiliating failure must be punished first, I think.”

His eyes narrow suspiciously and he snarls, “You would torture me? I have spared your life out of sentimental weakness—and at the first opportunity you turn on me. I thought…” his voice softens with a slip of genuine sadness, “I thought you enjoyed our new arrangement.”

Your heart aches so sharply it catches you off guard—you really have grown fond of him—but you stay in character. “Come now. I finally caught you this time,” you say in a low voice, crouching down to his level until you are close enough to feel his breath on your lips. “I deserve a reward.”

“Ah,” he exclaims in a long breath, understanding. His lips twist into a devilish smirk. “What sort of punishment did you have in mind?”

You lower your mouth to his, and he greets you, familiar and eager, sharp teeth nipping at your lower lip, tugging at it as you slowly pull away.

“I have a better use for that mouth of yours,” you say, standing. You unfasten your pants, skin prickling and face flushing as you work them off, while the wraith watches, narrow pupils flaring open with desire. A throbbing between your legs aches to be satisfied. You stand over him. “I can’t help thinking, it would be a shame not to take advantage of your being stuck at exactly the right height…”

“Well, if I must earn my freedom,” he purrs. “Whatever your highness commands…” His clawed hands grab your thighs for leverage, digging into your skin as he pulls himself toward you.

He eases his mouth over your heat, tongue teasing your tender flesh. You give a sharp gasp as he makes contact, feeling the warmth begin to spread between your legs. He chuckles softly at your reaction before sucking eagerly at your arousal, drawing an even louder moan. Your back arches almost involuntarily.

“Th-that’s good,” you whimper, trying to sound commanding.

He’s caught in your trap, beneath you, making wet noises as he licks and strokes to please you, yet you still feel like you’re at his mercy. You rock your hips against his warm tongue, wrapping your arms around his hips and burying your face to stifle your cries as you’re flooded with sensation. As you cling to him, you feel his hard bulge growing against your cheek.

“That feels so good… you deserve a reward too.”

You free him from his pants and take his length into your mouth. He moans into you, a hiccup in his rhythm, but keeps working you dutifully. You can’t believe how arousing it is having his cock fill your mouth as he licks you—its head is covered in small barbs that look sharp, but are fleshy and soft, massaging the inside of your mouth as you lap at his shaft, bobbing up and down, taking pleasure in each muffled grunt and whine you can draw from him, feeling him grow even harder. The taste is musky and not quite human, but familiar. There is something powerful in the taste of a wraith’s cock that makes you powerful in taking it.

You can already feel yourself close to the edge. Though you try to keep up a rhythm, it’s hard to focus on his needs when his tongue is hitting you in just the right places to make you oblivious to anything but the waves of tension building inside you, threatening to break. He slides a hand up under your shirt, feeding organ contracting and expanding like kisses against your skin. He circles around your chest until coming to rest on a nipple. It latches on like a suction cup, and hits you with a euphoric shock that surges through the hardened peak and spreads under your skin like warm electricity. You scream, gagging around his hardness, and come hard into his mouth, unable to hold back. He keeps licking and sucking you mercilessly, riding you through each spasming wave of your orgasm until you’re completely spent, and have to push him away, panting hard and nearly sobbing.

“Did you enjoy that trick?” he flexes his feeding hand. “I thought it might put you over the edge, and my jaw was beginning to get tired.” He’s been swinging like a pendulum since you pushed him. “Now will you let me down?!”

“Oh! Yes, of course!” Your cheeks heat.

You pull a hidden knife from your boot and quickly saw through the snare rope. Instead of crashing comically on his head like you’d half anticipated, he flips to his feet with feline grace. On the ground again, he towers above you, reclaiming his physical advantage—the superior strength and healing power of the wraith. Your heart flutters instinctively, preparing you to run.

Then he wrings the slippery fluids out his beard, and suddenly you forget he was ever intimidating. His hair is a mess framing his well-fucked face, saliva dripping up it, too, toward his eyes.

“Did I satisfy you, my master?” he smiles, eyes glinting with false obsequiousness. But it’s enough that he plays along for you.

“You did exceptionally well today, servant.”

He nods in approbation. “Then perhaps you’ll allow me to take my own prize? Only if you permit it, of course.”

“Hmm, I don’t know,” you tease. “Maybe I should make you chase me again first. There are rules to this, you know.”

Without warning, he sweeps your feet from under you and has you pinned to the ground before you know what’s happened. “Caught you,” he smiles.

“Hey, no fair!”

“That must be record time.”

You’re about to pretend to protest, but he’s already kissing your neck, his hot breath in your ear turning you on all over again. You nuzzle into his silvery hair.

“Very well, then.”

[ice-cream-nekogirl]

Rotten Spaghetti Noodles and a Stranger Things Marathon (Izuku Midoriya x Reader)

Not gonna lie lol Bob’s Burgers inspired me with this one XD

Summary: Poor Deku is forced into a wild goose chase with Reader-chan after a prank goes horribly wrong on the most volatile classmate in 1-A...

Featuring: Precious Cinnamon Roll!! 

You can find this story here too on ao3!: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17545592/chapters/41570912

You sighed heavily as you sat on the couch of the common room, staring at the girls who were just chatting frivolously with each other as per usual. At first you thought about going over to join in on their conversation, but they talked about the most boring topics sometimes that you decided to just sit and be bored by yourself.

Kaminari was pretty much your partner-in-crime when it came to doing fun things but he was hanging with Kirishima, Sero and Bakugou. Typical boys. But the more you thought about it, the more you realized you probably should have gone with him, even though Bakugou wasn’t crazy about the fact that you were friends with ‘Deku’. Well, that was understatement, he didn’t like that at all, he never had been in fact. Truth was, you grew up alongside him and Izuku, but you met Bakugou first, only to get closer to Izuku and remained his only friend even when Bakugou picked on him and always threw smart-ass comments his way which he hated. You assumed it was jealousy, but that was just your pride talking.

However, the more you thought about Bakugou, the more Izuku started popping up in your mind. Making you sigh in content, smiling fondly at the thought of the sweet, green-haired dork. How you adored him, he was almost too pure for this world to the point where it was almost REALLY annoying because you had a mischievous streak he often fretted over.

“Oh Izuku… you make me wish I was a better person.” You said quietly as you blushed a little bit, looking around and making sure no one could hear you going into ‘lovey-dovey’ mode. So to distract yourself, you finally got up off your ass and headed into the kitchen, maybe eating something could take away some of the boredom.

But you didn’t expect to see Izuku passing by through there, and he perked up upon seeing you. “(Y/N), Hey!” He quickly greeted you with that adorable smile that easily lit up your day every time you saw it, hell it practically sent you in one of your dazes as you smiled shyly and waved. “Hey Izuku…”

“Are you okay?” He asked you, concerned when he saw how ‘out of it’ you appeared, and you blushed warmly as you tried to downplay it.

“Ah yeah! Totally… hehe, I’m just hungry so I’m gonna… get something to eat that’s uh… why I came in here!” You stammered and laughed nervously, quickly opening the refrigerator as if to emphasize your point, even though Izuku looked a little confused by your odd behavior. He smiled at you anyway though, thinking you were cute.

But he flinched when you gasped suddenly, and loudly at the refrigerator.

“Oh Sweet mother of All-Might…” You said in pure awe as you stared wide-eyed at one of the containers you found in one of the deeper parts of the fridge. Carefully picking it up, you brought it out and placed it on the table, but the old, gloppy contents with some black spots and furry looking specks that stained its corners disgusted your friend a little bit.

“Wha… what in the world is that…?” Izuku nervously asked, but at that moment he realized he probably shouldn’t have asked that.

“It’s spaghetti! Remember a month ago when Kaminari suggested that we try foreign food for dinner, so we went with Italian and we decided to save some of the leftovers because it was so good that night?” You reminded him and the memory instantly hit him once it came back to him. “Oh right! I remember that… that was a month ago…?” Izuku asked, making a face. There’s no way that spaghetti could still be good at all if it’s a month old.

Going against your better judgment, you opened it up and the pungent stank quickly hit your nose as you turned away with a small gag, seeing Izuku cover his nose once the smell got to him too. Despite your disgust, you were extremely amused too. “Ohoho WOW… we totally forgot all about this because this stinks to high-heaven… it’s beautiful…” You snickered, and Izuku saw wheels turning in your head…

“You know what we gotta do with this right?”

“Throw it away?”

“Nope~! We gotta drop this on someone outside a window! We might NEVER get another chance like this! When you have rotten spaghetti noodles, you HAVE to drop it on someone. I mean you can’t NOT use it for that kind of thing. We have an opportunity of a lifetime…!” You explained as if it were the simplest idea in the world, but such a terrible idea made Izuku tremble and look panicked. That was practically a death sentence.

“W-What?! Y-You can’t be serious…! A-Are… Are you… are you crazy?!” He asked you, whisper-yelling as he looked around very nervously to make sure that nobody was around to hear this.

“Haha I’m totally off my rocker dude… you know this… now c’mon… it’s not like we’ll get caught. As soon as it hits somebody we’ll run like hell! It’s so easy!” You giggled almost like a mad-woman at the thought, and Izuku just shook even more with a terrified whimper. It wasn’t in his nature to pull pranks like that, and he didn’t really like anyone being mad at him.

“I-I don’t know… i-it sounds like a really bad idea… I mean, for one it’s really mean… and second, if we hit the wrong person, this could lead to some seriously bad consequences… it just… it’s a bad idea… in fact, it’s a horrible idea… we can’t do that…” Izuku thought outloud, hoping that somehow he could talk you out of this. He thought about how it could all go wrong, and who they could end up hitting. Classmates like Kaminari, Kirishima, Sero, Ashido, Tsuyu and Uraraka might be a little more forgiving if they got spaghetti’d. The rest like Iida, Yaoyorozu and Tokoyami would be pissed but not hold a serious grudge, and then there was Todoroki and Bakugou. The worst people to prank…

Todoroki would definitely be pissed about it, but maybe he’d be forgiving if he explained it to him enough. Bakugou on the other hand… would never, ever forgive that.

Izuku shuddered at the mere thought.

“Izuku… I can’t pass up this opportunity… besides, I’m not gonna hit anyone like Todoroki if that’s what you’re worried about. I like the guy. If I’m lucky I’ll hit Kaminari or Iida. I’d love to see the looks on their faces.” You grinned widely and laughed somewhat wickedly as you carried the container, spinning around ever so slightly, much to Izuku’s discomfort.

He couldn’t find it in him to say no to you though. The truth was Izuku would follow you wherever you went, including to yours and his death because he was sure this was going to get you both killed somehow by the wrong classmate. Meanwhile, you were grinning happily as you were taking him up to the balcony of your room and looking downward for some potential victims, holding the container of disgusting, old food in your hands. Smiling widely, almost crazily and giggling so hard you could barely contain yourself.

“Hee-hee Izuku~. You and I are about to do something the world should have done a LONG time ago. This right here is going to make history. Just give me the signal when you see someone.” You grinned wide as you held the now open container of rotten spaghetti noodles as Izuku looked down to make sure nobody like Bakugou or Todoroki were coming.

“Uh…” His better judgment kicked in though, this was a terrible idea and it was going to happen soon as he saw a few heads coming out the door, two blondes, a brunette and one redhead. Oh no.

“Uh oh…! (Y-Y/N)!” He tried to alarm you, but apparently THAT was the signal for you to start.

“Someone’s there! Here we go!” You cheerfully poured down the container, letting the gloppy, thick red sauce and stringy, stale noodles rain down to the earth much to Izuku’s absolute horror as you both stared down, a broad smile across your face while Izuku’s was a look of horror as he shouted.

(insert slow-motion) “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!”

With a loud, squishing plop, the spaghetti noodles finally hit your victim in all it’s disgusting, stinky glory, staining his school uniform shirt with its foul, red and moldy sauce and decorating his blonde, spiky hair with a wreath of stale, wet noodles as he shouted in shock at the random onslaught.

“ARGH!!! What the fuck?!”

“Ewww dude…” Kirishima cringed and backed away slightly when his friend got splattered by old, moldy food, crinkling his nose in disgust when the smell hit him.

“Gross! What… what the hell is that…?!” That was Kaminari’s voice, and he shamelessly covered his nose as he forced himself to not snicker at his unfortunate classmate’s incident.

“Hey that’s… the spaghetti from last month…” Sero figured it out, and he looked a little nervous once he saw their friend’s look of shock quickly turn into an enraged expression as he looked upwards to see the identity of who they assumed would be his murder victim.

“K-Kacchan…!” Izuku froze up like he was hit with a paralysis quirk once he saw that it was Bakugou that you had ended up hitting. Now he was a hundred percent sure that this was going to be the end for you and him.

“Oh shit… is that Bakugou…?” You peered downwards a little bit to get a better look, but instantly regretted that once Bakugou’s seering, crimson red eyes looked upwards and made contact with your now wide, shocked (E/C) eyes as Izuku promptly freaked out and trembled like a leaf.

If looks could kill, you would definitely be dead. You could practically hear his feral growling as he clenched his fists.

“Hide. Hide. Hide! Hide! Hide!!” You and Izuku both exclaimed in alarm to each other, trying to back away as much as you could to avoid being seen by the explosive teen, but it was too late. He already saw you both.

“Deku! Shitty girl?!” Bakugou was livid, and looked ready to kill the two people he’s known since childhood and his friends could see it as they backed away a little bit. Seeing Bakugou angry wasn’t a spectacle, but after that trick. He wasn’t going to let neither of you get away.

However, as scared as you were, you couldn’t let Bakugou terrify you into submission since this was an accident. “Ohohokay… look dude… that was a total fluke on my part… that was supposed to be for Kaminari.” You attempted to reason with the pissed-off blonde, ignoring the indignant ‘Hey!’ coming from the former. “You don’t have to go all Lord Explosion Murder-y on us…” As calm as you were, you should have known better than to try to reason with Bakugou when he was this pissed. To make matters worse, you were snickering the entire time and trying to cover your mouth to quell them.

“Bullshit!! This is your way of getting back at me! And don’t fucking lie to me I'm right aren't I?!” He angrily wiped off the sauce and noodles off himself as much as possible despite how disgusting it felt on his hands and the smell was horrific. Bakugou didn’t believe a word you said. Ever since Izuku acquired One For All, and even after he found out the truth about it, him and Bakugou still weren’t exactly friend-ish yet. And with your own improvement of your telekinesis quirk getting stronger ever since you got to this school, Bakugou assumed that you and Deku were somehow in cahoots together to try and take him down a peg. He wasn’t wrong on YOUR part though.

“N-No! Kacchan we swear we would never!!” Izuku was going to make a vain attempt to reason with him, but you quickly took the floor to protect him.

“He’s right. Leave Izuku alone, besides Bakugou, if I wanted to get back at you, it would have been a LOT worse than this. Though in hindsight this is pretty brilliant. Since that’s rotten spaghetti noodles you’re covered in. I recommend taking a shower though I can smell you from up here!” You explained but didn’t make yourself sound any better as you took the moment to tease him a little bit, wafting your hand for emphasis even though it wasn’t an exaggeration. You can literally smell that rotten spaghetti from up here. And it pissed him off to no end.

“What the hell was that?!”

“Stop taunting him…!” Izuku advised you worriedly, since he knew better than to make Bakugou madder if he was already mad. You didn’t listen.

“I said take a shower because you stink Noodlehead! Get it?!” You snickered and laughed, tears in your eyes when seeing Bakugou practically turn red from such vicious rage. “H-Hey c’mon man… s-she’s just playing…” Kirishima trembled slightly when seeing how pissed his friend was, and he wanted to save you from getting killed by trying to calm down Bakugou but he just ignored him.

“Why you fucking bitch! Don’t you fucking laugh at me! Wait til I get up there I’ll kill you both!!” He declared and quickly made his way inside the building and now you and Izuku couldn’t help but panic a little bit.

“Why did you say that?!” Izuku frantically asked you, looking at you like you had to have been insane to provoke a dragon-tempered boy like Bakugou.

“It was funny!” You gave your rather weak reasoning, but that didn’t matter now that you were both pretty much doomed. At least you would die alongside Izuku, the boy you loved with all your heart. However, a sudden idea came to your head as you grabbed his hand and lead him out of your room.

“W-What are you doing?!”

“I have an idea! But we need Yaoyorozu!” You stated, quickly rushing over to the common room where you thankfully found Momo among the girls. “Momo! Momo we need your help!” Rushing over to the tall girl, you clasped your hands together in a begging manner, much to her shock and confusion.

“What’s the matter?!” She asked in worry once she heard the urgency in your voice. However, once you explained it all quickly to her, she wasn’t very amused at all by how you childishly pranked Bakugou, but she helped you both anyway with what you needed because she wanted to help you and Izuku stay alive.

…

Bakugou was on the prowl as he marched inside the building, resembling an animal hunting down prey with Kirishima, Kaminari and Sero meekly following behind so they could hold him back in case he really did try to kill you and Izuku.

He knew where your room was, but he assumed the two of you were going to hide somewhere like the ‘cowards’ you were as he went up the first floor. Some of his classmates, quickly backing away when seeing how pissed he was, and at how smelly he was since he couldn’t get the spaghetti stink off of him.

But he didn’t pay attention to all the damn extras, all that matter was finding you and Deku so he could kill you both for making him look like a fool and daring to prank him like that. And he was surprised when he saw you both just lounging on the couch of the common room without a care in the world as he growled like a wild animal.

“You idiots! So you both want to die huh?!” He barked aloud in the once-quiet room, aggressively grabbing yours and ‘Izuku’s’ shoulders roughly only for the bodies in front of him to suddenly collapse, revealing two headless mannequins wearing your blazers with soccer balls bouncing to the ground which acted as the heads as they adorned wigs of Izuku’s messy green hair and your (H/C) (H/S) hair.

“D-Did their heads just fall off?!” Kirishima asked, his eyes wide with horror as he began trembling, having not seen that the bodies were just dummies and not really you or Izuku.

“Y-You really killed them?!” Kaminari exclaimed in the same terror as Kirishima, since he didn’t see the dummies or the soccer-balls either.

Bewildered and wide-eyed, Bakugou picked up the soccer ball with Izuku’s hair, squeezing it hatefully until it popped as he let out an extremely irritated growl. That was the second time you made him look like a fool, he was SO going to kill you both now.

“DEKU!! SHITTY GIRL!!” He screamed so loud you swore the entire building shook. It was definitely loud enough for you and Izuku to hear from downstairs as you ran down to the bottom floor.

“AH! Kacchan figured it out!!” Izuku started to panic again as he ran with you out of the building, although you couldn’t help but snicker because you wished you could’ve seen the look on his face.

“Duh Izuku I heard him! I’m pretty sure the whole fucking country heard him too! Come on! We can’t be here, not while he’s in that mood, I know where we can hide!” You said as the two of you started to run away from Heights Alliance, passing a few of your confused classmates as they watched you run.

However, neither you or Izuku expected Bakugou to show up so soon as you both heard the door slam wide open.

“You two aren’t getting away that easy! You can run but you can’t fucking hide from me!!” Bakugou shouted, immediately chasing after you both. He instantly knew that you were both going to try and hide from him, just like you two always did when the three of you were children.

You both shouted in shock, and Izuku reluctantly turned to see Bakugou coming for you guys with bloody murder in his eyes. “He’s already caught up?!” You asked in shock, confident that your dummies would have distracted him for longer than that. “You dropped spaghetti on him!” Izuku exclaimed matter-of-factly, not that surprised that Bakugou had caught up this fast.

“I know I did Izuku! But I swear my plan was fool-proof!”

“You know Kacchan is no fool! And he was the fastest in every grade in elementary and middle school!”

“Well I guess that means we’re fucked huh?!” You asked while you two kept running, and you couldn’t help but feel a little bit scared that you were going to be fucked if you didn’t think of something fast. However, you and Izuku nearly perked up upon seeing someone from afar, but the red and white was all the indication you both needed to know. And as soon as you saw Todoroki up closer, you grinned and immediately called for help.

“Help us Todoroki!!”

That certainly surprised him as he stopped with a bewildered expression as you and Izuku ran past him fast enough to send wind through his hair. “Midoriya? (L/N)? What’s going on?” He was calm in spite of the fact that you and Izuku were both freaking out as you both took a moment to stop for a minute.

“W-We’re kind of running from someone…” Izuku started off, panting a little bit as you finished his sentence. “It’s Bakugou! And he’s going to kill us! Build a wall of ice or fire fast!” You kind of begged since Bakugou was getting closer.

“Don’t even think about helping them IcyHot! Or I’ll kill you too!” Todoroki paid him no mind though, he heard you call him for help and he did exactly that. In the blink of an eye, Todoroki raised his right side and created a giant wall of ice to block his volatile classmate from getting to you and Izuku. “DAMMIT!!!” Now all three of you heard Bakugou’s enraged shouts, but it didn’t take too long for you to start hearing explosions as he began carving through the wall to get to you, Izuku AND Todoroki. That was three on his hit list now.

“Thank you Todoroki! I think you saved our lives!” Izuku was extremely grateful as you couldn’t help but sigh in relief. That wall would definitely buy you three some time.

Although he was confused, Todoroki started to run with you and Izuku but he was clearly looking for an explanation. “Why is he chasing you two?”

“Oh, he’s just mad because I accidentally dropped some rotten spaghetti on his head. It was hilarious! You should’ve seen his face, I thought he was going to literally explode like a volcano..." As you snickered, Izuku quietly whined a little bit since as much as you found it funny, he wasn't crazy about the fact that yours and his already complicated childhood friend probably hated you two even more now.

"Why would you do that?" Todoroki asked you, his voice sounding somewhat incredulous since he saw no rhyme or reason to doing such a childish act. Because you were friends with Izuku, he had gotten fairly used to your presence and steadily became your friend too, but he found you very strange due to your behavior and penchant for mischief and juvenile jokes.

"Because it's funny! And besides Todoroki, life-lesson, when life gives you rotten spaghetti noodles, you dump it on someone!" You exclaimed and gave your reasoning, but of course Todoroki wasn't amused at all.

"That sounds like nonsense." He stated bluntly, but you just stuck your tongue at him. "So you're telling me that if life gave you rotten spaghetti noodles that you wouldn't dump it on your shitty dad if you had the opportunity?" You raised a brow at him, and that somewhat silenced him a bit as he thought about that. And you laughed a bit when you saw him give the smallest smile when he clearly envisioned that and started to see some of the comedy in that. Including the idea of Bakugou getting spaghetti'd, he was starting to wish he had seen that now just a little bit.

"Not you too Todoroki!!" Izuku exclaimed in slight shock, since dumping old pasta is why they were even running in the first place, and yet you and Todoroki were clearly amused by it.

"DAMN YOU YOU ICYHOT BASTARD!!" Bakugou finally broke through the wall, and you three were far enough now but he could still see you, and the three of you turned to see the same murder in his eyes.

"RUN!!" You shouted as both your friends followed you, and Todoroki seemed to tag along without complaint. He wasn't scared or anything, but he felt that he should probably stay with you and Izuku as long as Bakugou is that angry with you both. He wasn't letting up, and somehow he managed to get closer even though you three were all running as fast as you could thanks to adrenaline as shocked and confused classmates and students alike stopped and stared.

"We need to throw away dead weight!" You suddenly said to Izuku and Todoroki, who both looked at you in slight shock. "WHAT?! You're not talking about one of us are you?!" Izuku asked you, wide-eyed and really hoping you wouldn't go that far.

"What are you nuts?! I ain't throwing away neither of you guys!" You said, and as soon as you saw one classmate you quickly used your quirk.

"D'AH! Why am I floating?! Have I died and gone to heaven?! Why are all the girls still wearing their uniforms?!" Mineta asked loudly, before he saw you and you smirked evilly at him as he shrieked in horror. He let out another pig-like squeal as you sent him flying right towards Bakugou whose eyes slightly widened and he quickly raised his palm to blast away that little punk into the atmosphere as you each heard a scream and a little 'ding'.

"You're bad (Y/N)..." Izuku said with a tremor of fear in his tone as you laughed happily, "I know!!" Cheerfully, you used your quirk to use anything else in your vicinity to toss and block Bakugou from getting any closer, and you did manage to succeed when some of the items, including books, trash-cans, and a few other students to slow him down as you snickered again when you heard Bakugou's enraged roars.

2 Hours Later

After 2 hours of running around and playing wild goose chase with Bakugou, you, Izuku and Todoroki finally outran him and came to the best hiding place you knew he wouldn't find you at. The comfort of your house and in your (style) room.

“(Y-Y/N)… you know that we can’t hide in your room forever right? Kacchan probably remembers that you and I would always come over here to hide from him whenever he was really mad, and not only that, but we still have school to attend even if he’s still going to be mad about what just happened. There’s just no way we can avoid him unless we-”. You stopped Izuku as he started mumbling, looking rather nonchalant as you sat on your bed and turned on Netflix.

“He’s not going to find us here… and even if he does, he can’t get in…” You said breezily, not really worrying about Bakugou at the moment as you relaxed on your bed. “Sit with me Izuku. C’mon, let’s just figure out what to watch.” Patting your bed and gesturing him to sit, Izuku blushed as he nervously made his way over and sat beside you, his face beginning to redden as you scooted closer to him with a content smirk.

Much to Todoroki’s discomfort, whom you had invited into your house on your run from Bakugou. “This feels odd... to see you and Midoriya like this..." He said very awkwardly, even though he was oblivious to how you and Midoriya felt about each other, he just knew that the atmosphere was a little awkward. Especially since he and Midoriya were in a girl’s room, and he didn't quite understand why Midoriya suddenly began to blush like that. Nor did he quite know that this what it meant to be the third wheel.

“Ah. Todoroki. C’mere. Sit with us. Plenty of room.” However, you weren’t going to leave Todoroki out. Izuku was the one for you, but you were a bit of a pervert at heart and didn’t mind a very attractive boy like Todoroki being close to you too.

That surprised the boy, and he appeared unsure for a moment until you patted the free space for him to sit down. “C’mon. Right here it’s cool.” You gently coaxed him, and with that Todoroki slowly made his way over to sit down on your bed, next to you while Midoriya was on your other side. You looked extremely pleased and content as you sighed happily.

“You know. You two are my favorite classmates.” You admitted, which earned a bright blush from Izuku and a light flush of surprise from Todoroki.

“Y-You’re just saying that…” Izuku got rather bashful, avoiding your gaze as his face visibly turned red which you found absolutely adorable.

“Why me?” Todoroki sounded more confused, he was strangely flattered but he didn’t know why you liked him.

“Todoroki. I like you because you’re powerful, and you’re not annoying. Plus you’re a lot nicer to me now! You were a total jackass at first until Izuku got to ya.” That came out rather blunt but cheerful as Todoroki nearly expressed some guilt for his past behavior, since he didn’t treat you with much regard before befriending Midoriya. “And you’re cute so that’s a bonus. The other guys are such guys…” You added, and Todoroki looked almost more surprised when you called him cute.

“Izuku. I like you because you've been my friend since we were both really little. I might have met Bakugou first, but I liked you a lot better. I've always liked you a lot better." You admitted as Izuku began to blush even harder, his green eyes widening as his mouth formed in an 'oh' shape as you continued to speak, blushing warmly, "And not only that but you've stuck with me... even though I'm no better than Bakugou. I always drag you into crazy shit, like today, and yet you still stuck with me. I'm a loser." You chuckled and rolled your eyes in a moment of self-loathing. 

"But you never once said 'no' to me. You knew what you were getting into, you knew all my ideas were insane... but you stood with me the whole time... Izuku you make me wish I was a better person... that's why I like you so much... in fact... that's why I... I like-like you so much..." Your face burned red as you grinned shyly once you finally admitted your feelings for the boy you've known since childhood. Izuku's blush deepened, his look of shock not fading as Todoroki also blushed at the sincerity of your words, he wasn't good at reading feelings but based on the way you were talking to Izuku, it seemed that you liked him as more than just a friend.

"You... like-like me?" Izuku asked shakily, obviously still in shock at the mere idea that someone actually liked him as more than just a friend.

"Duh." You smirked and chuckled, thinking that your feelings were pretty obvious since your other classmates, especially Mina and Asui picked up on it fast and had actually encouraged you to tell him. And you did!

"I-I... w-wow I..." He was smiling wide, trying and failing to conceal his grin as he couldn't stop blushing, but he did look you in the eyes as you smirked and put your arm around him. "(Y/N)... I-I... I like-like you too... I kind of... always have... I kind of always thought you like-liked Kacchan though... since you were always making fun of him..." He admitted, even though part of him also knew that you didn't like Bakugou that way even if you did tease him in a manner similar to how girls taunted boys they liked.

"Nope! Hahaha! That porcupine might be fun to mess with, but I don't like-like him... not even sure I like him either though." You shrugged your shoulders as Izuku tried not to snicker, but he squeaked and blushed crimson once he felt your lips peck him on the cheek. And now Todoroki really felt like the third wheel, this was very awkward, and yet at the same time he was also kind of happy for you and Izuku.

"Do you like me?" He suddenly asked you and you and Izuku looked at him in confusion. However, Izuku wasn't jealous because he knew Todoroki didn't think of you like that. At least he seriously hoped he didn't.

But you couldn't help but smile wide at the heterochromatic boy. "Oh Todoroki of course I like you! I just don't like-like you." You affirmed and that reassured him a little bit, relieved that you liked him. "

"You're both saying 'like-like'. When you say that, does that mean when someones likes another person beyond friendship?" He asked, and you and Izuku both nodded with smiles, and Todoroki seemed to get that now.

"That's it bro. Now... Todoroki, new boyfriend, let's do a Stranger Things marathon." You grinned, putting your arm around your new boyfriend whom was smiling and still blushing, especially when you called him 'boyfriend'. Izuku couldn't believe it, he was ecstatic! Even if Bakugou was still angry and out there looking for you both, he was actually your boyfriend now, and you were his girlfriend! There was nothing that could spoil this feeling...

“(Y/N)!” Suddenly, your mom called you and you groaned in annoyance because you had to sit up from your comfortable spot.

“Yeah Ma?”

“Your old friend Katsuki is outside!” Your’s and Izuku’s eyes widened with shock, horror more evident on his face as he looked ready to freak out again, “AH! I knew it! I knew he’d remember!” He exclaimed, getting up off the bed and peeked out your window, flinching once he saw the still pissed blonde walking towards your house.

“Don’t let him in mom! MOM!!" You pleaded for your mother to NOT let Bakugou in, and although she listened to you. He wasn't going anywhere until you and Izuku came outside.

"He's not going to let this go..." Izuku muttered fearfully as Todoroki sighed at just how vindictive Bakugou could be. Obviously he himself wouldn't have been happy if he got spaghetti'd, but he wouldn't really stake someone out just to beat them bloody.

"I've got a plan..." You said deviously, bringing out your phone as Izuku and Todoroki looked at you, not knowing exactly what your 'plan' was but it was probably something underhanded.

"Don't tell me... you know someone...?" Izuku asked you with a small sigh and you smiled at him and blew him a kiss. "Izuku, I'm not letting Katsuki ruin this for us... sure it might be my fault, but still! I know how to get him to leave us alone..." You said sweetly, and Izuku decided to let you take care of it. You were his girlfriend now, and he trusted you.

"Hello Shinsou?" You smirked as soon as your call went through, and Izuku flinched at the knowledge that you knew Shinsou, and well enough to have his phone number...

"Yeah... I'm gonna need your help..."

There you go again. But Izuku adored you with all of your heart, and you adored him with all your heart too. It was all worth it, even if it was at Bakugou's expense of being spaghetti'd.

In fact, that made it all the more worth it to you. You got Izuku's heart, and you got to dump rotten pasta on Bakugou. This was pretty much the best day of your life.

[elenatria]

Thor Ragnarok is about Space Viking Orgies, in the very best way.

Ok then, quick headcanon.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17409986

Loki didn’tland on one of Sakaar’s dumps like Thor. In true jumping-through-DrStrange’s-wormholes fashion, he ended up on the floor of the Grandmaster’sbrightly coloured Living-dolls-room; a fitting name for the place where hecollected all his prized possessions, his beautiful people, his “livingpleasure dolls”. 

He wasplaying “My sugar baby just cares for me” on the piano when a creature of sinfulbeauty and exquisite grace fell flat on his face out of nowhere, messy darklocks all over the place, big blue eyes staring up at him in utter shock. Shockbecause somehow he was still alive and hadn’t been spaghettified by thewormhole that brought him there, or was it because he was suddenly surroundedby a colourful and scantily dressed cortege of faceless socialites with poutylips and obscenely long and slimy tentacles?  The Grandmaster didn’t know (andhe probably couldn’t give a toss right now given the fact that he had twocollared boys on their knees with one hand wandering under his robes and theother jerking each other) but he surely gasped in contentment at the look ofperfect fear and abandonment in his captive’s eyes. 

“Captive”?

Without adoubt. There was no way this god-like vision would choose to stay in his courtof his own free will. The stranger would learn to love it there even if orgiesweren’t his thing but, in the meantime, this heaven-sent “guest” would probablyneed more than a little persuasion. The Grandmaster drew a gun from underneaththe keyboard and shot him, planting a small glowing disc on his neck. Loki, nowon his knees, flinched with a pained “ARGH!” and reached for the disc.

“Ah-ah-ah, Iwouldn’t touch that,” the Grandmaster warned raising his ringed hand, “itstill burns, you know.”

“It’s burningmy neck too,” Loki hissedunder his breath trembling slightly as he stood on his feet.

“Yeah, well,your neck will get used to that,” the Grandmaster waved indifferently, “but wewouldn’t want those beautiful digits getting burned, would we? Lovely, longfingers with such perfect nails, so full of potential, let me… let me take alook at them.”

He tookLoki’s hands in his inspecting them, brushing a varnished thumb over their paleknuckles and veins with sensual playfulness. “A pianist’s hands!” heexclaimed and turned to his guests who were ever ready to applaud their masterand host as they eagerly awaited the delicious surprises he had in store forthem.

Loki shiftedhis eyes from one corner of the room to the other spotting the luscious chaiselongues, the crux decussatas on the walls, the spanking benches, the slaves in funnelgags, the cages. He also noticed the cameras hanging from every corner; so manycameras, so many angles, and people moving lazily among them as if used tobeing monitored and filmed.

“Now now,there’s nothing to worry about,” the Grandmaster soothed him flashing hisperfect teeth as he pushed Loki’s chin with his finger to face himagain. “You see, a fine specimen like you has two choices when he ends upin my court. Prisoner?…” 

He pointedtowards the far end of the room at a tank that was almost filled with water.The naked young man who was floating in it, chained, struggling to keep hishead above the surface, was coughing in agony while his jerking feet didn’t domuch to improve his situation. A group of aliens with huge fist-like knobsinstead of dicks were sitting around the tank, working their cocks or eachother’s and occasionally staining the unbreakable glass with their fluorescentcum as their animalistic grunts signaled their successive orgasms.

Before Loki hadtime to register the suffering in the young man’s pleading eyes the Grandmasterturned on his heels and with a dancing gesture he pointed at a half-nakedcouple on the nearest chaise longue. One could not tell if they were male orfemale but for all their heavy make-up they barely seemed of age. 

“Or pet?”suggested the Grandmaster as he nodded towards the pair that kept fondling eachother as one of them shoved his tongue down his partner’s throat, earningdelighted moans and sneaking naughty glances at their petrified guest. “Yousee, it’s always the two P’s in here, Prisoner or Pet, Penis or Pussy, onecan’t decide, can he?” the golden clad host joked moving his tanned hands likea scale. “So what is it gonna be, sweet cheeks?”

Loki cockedan unimpressed brow and with his nail he checked the thickness of the disc andthe length of its claws buried in his skin as if fiddling idly with anearring. 

“I would saypet,” he shrugged, causing the Grandmaster to break a tiny anticipatingsmile. “but I have a third P for you, my dear friend. How about… prince?”

“Prince?” theGrandmaster narrowed his eyes with joyful curiosity. “Now that’s a newone.”

“A prince,”Loki nodded as he seemed to grow more confident with each word, with each newtwinkle in his captor’s eyes. “A prince who would do anything to please his king as long as he’s treated as royalty.”

TheGrandmaster’s fascinated smile grew even wider. “OoohI love this game!” he cheered rubbing his hands. “And what should theking do to win his prince’s favour?”

“Well I don’tknow…” Loki replied leaning on the couch as he crossed his legs, pushing backhis jacket to reveal his crotch in a promising posture that made the leather creakbetween his thighs. “Buy me new clothes for a start because I can’tpossibly be seen in your court in these filthy Asgardian tatters, can I?” heurged his new friend looking up at a camera drone that was hovering over him,its lens attached to a phallic extension reaching for his face like a hornytelescope. “I’m guessing you have a multitude of fans waiting anxiouslyfor your next broadcast, haven’t you?”

“Oh newclothes for sure,” the Grandmaster murmured as he flicked the tip of his tongue. “Bluewill look so good on you, my sweet sweet boy, Sakaarian blue, my favourite. So so good…”

Loki took twosteps towards him, looking him up and down and resting his eyes on his groinfor a split second, blinking as if intrigued by what lied underneath thatexceedingly long red belt. “And another thing,” he cooed as hestraightened the Grandmaster’s collar and let his fingers slip down therim of his robe.  

“Anything youwant,” the Grandmaster offered with half-closed eyes, delighted at his new prisonerwho was slowly but surely turning into an honoured guest.

“Maybe helpme get rid of… this?…”

Loki draggedhis hands over his ribs and pecs, his thumbs twitching slightly as they passedover where his nipples should be, finally reaching his neck. A light groan ofdiscomfort escaped his lips as he knitted his brows and wrapped his longfingers around the side of his neck massaging it with deliberately slow movesthat evoked even longer moans. That little display had the silver-haired man staringwith huge wet eyes and a hanging jaw as he seemed to have forgotten all his otherguests, even the collared boys at his feet who had stopped jacking off and werewaiting to see if the newcomer was about to be the giver or the taker in thisestablishment.

Until Loki’sfinger started tapping on the disc.

“Oh no no, sweetie, that can’t be done,” theGrandmaster answered widening his eyes in fake concern. “That’s for yourown safety. It’s dangerous out there, we wouldn’t want you to get lost oranything, people on this planet are cannibals! I know the disc can be sometimespainful but in time you’ll learn to love it, I promise you.”

“Oh I don’tmind the pain…” Loki said giving him the most seductive smile he could wearunder the circumstances as he slid his palm over the arm of the sofa, slowlyfanning out his fingers to squeeze deep and hard and making sure theGrandmaster noticed every single move. “I have an uncanny resistance to it,it seems. It’s just that-” he paused licking his lips as if trying to find theright words. 

When heraised his eyes on the Grandmaster’s face again every trace of hopelessness wasgone. He bent over the older man’s shoulder, caressing his ear with his hotbreath.

“It’s justthat I’m not into electrostim, my friend. Not really my thing,” he shook hishead casually. “I can perform better when I’m not forced into things, you’lllike me better when I’m more… welcoming.”

His blue gaze,heavy with desire, now belonged to a man eager to beg, eager to please. Eagerto forget his previous life and whatever complications had brought him there.

“Is that so?”the Grandmaster asked with glazed eyes drinking in Loki’s scent as soft ravenhair washed over his cheek like a breeze.

“Try me,”Loki whispered his provocation pushing his knee between the Grandmaster’sthighs, rubbing the growing hardness over the fabric.

“I will,” thetyrant reassured him as he slipped the fob device out of his pocket and pressedthe button, deactivating the obedience disc on Loki’s neck. “In every possible way.”

[professional-anti]

City of Bones: Chapter Two

Chapter Two: Secrets and Lies Clary’s drawing and experiencing some Frustration. And like…..ya girl I gotcha. I know the pain. Clary wishes she could be more like her mother which is kind of sweet but super cliché. The phone rings, and it’s Simon being That Lovable Dork��� and pretending to be one of the guys she saw carying a knife. It’s a little funny, ngl, but Simon…come on. Clary’s upset rn.

Clary’s mom was apparently upset they were home late, and we get this:

“I am the bane of her existence,” Clary said, mimicking her mother’s precise phrasing with only a slight twinge of guilt.

…That was her mother’s precise phrasing? Clary, don’t feel guilty mimicking that. Your mom called you the bane of her existence! This is just bad writing, y’all. Jocelyn Fray is set up to be this loving, kind mom…and she says something like that? It makes sense that she’s angry, like, fine, let her be angry. But Cassandra Clare has absolutely no sense of extremes. This is just a li’l too much, babe. Tone it down.

OH GODD. I forgot. Simon has a band. Of course he does, bc this can’t get any more cliché. Simon invites Clary to a poetry reading one of his bandmates is doing. So far, it seems like all of Clary’s friends are boys, which really urks me. Let girls be friends! Let girls take care of each other! A girl isn’t “cool” just bc all her friends are boys. A girl who says “I don’t get along with other girls?” Take care of her. There is some deep internalized mysoginy going on. (Don’t @ me!)

Apparently Eric is really bad at poetry, which, like, mood. They agree that even though Clary’s mom is mad at her for going out the night before, Simon’ll still pick Clary up and bring her to the poetry slam. Not so nice of Simon, but I get the appeal of dragging someone along to a terrible poetry reading. Sometimes you just need support.

There’s a picture of Clary’s dad over the mantel. Apparently he was a soldier who died crashing his car into a tree before Clary was born. Even someone who has never heard anything about these books before and is experiencing them for the first time would be able to tell that Clary has clearly been fed a pack of lies. Apparently Jocelyn never talks about him but has a box with his initials (JC, gonna come up later 100%) with his medals inside.

Clary hears someone coming and grabs a book bc “Jocelyn recognized reading as a sacred pastime and wouldn’t interrupt Clary in the middle of a book, even to yell at her.” Ummmm,,,, sounds like a bad policy, Jocie. Clary should have walked in the night before with a book glued to her face.

A guy called Luke comes in holding folded cardboard boxes, and all I can picture is this:

And that’s how we’ll be thinking of Luke from now on. There’s some dumb background info:

“Hey, Un—hey, Luke,” she said. He’d asked her to stop calling him Uncle Luke about a year ago, claiming that it made him feel old, and anyway reminded him of Uncle Tom’s Cabin. Besides, he’d remind her gently, he wasn’t really her uncle, just a close friend of her mother’s who’d known her all her life.

I’M SCREAMING. This is bad writing, folks. This is bad writing. Have any of you guys braved the steaming shit pile that is Handbook for Mortals? This reminds me of that. Totally unnecessary detail that just detracts from the action. Besides being unnecessary, it’s really fucking awkward. Nobody talks like that. “Hi, Uncle Luke!” “Don’t call me that. That reminds me of Uncle Tom’s Cabin, which for some reason Cassandra Clare won’t italicize. Besides, I’m not really your uncle, just a close friend of your mother’s who’s known you all your life.” Umm, Luke??? That’s what people call close friends of their parent’s. It’s a known thing that people do. Also, most people do not think of Uncle Tom’s Cabin after hearing “Uncle Luke”. So calm down, Uncle Luke.

There’s some banter. Apparently Clary’s mom is parking the truck. (Do you guys know how hard it is for me not to type Clare instead of Clary?? It keeps happening.)

Apparently the book Clary grabbed from the side-table was The Golden Bough. Now, spoiler alert: Jocelyn has had Clary’s memories of magic all wiped, which I know from the first time I read this hell book. So why would she purposely put books about mythology and magic in the house??????

Clary asks Luke if he’s ever seen something no one else could see, and he reacts totally unsuspiciously by dropping his tape gun. He spews some bullshit about hallucinating being okay bc she’s “an artist” and “sees the world in ways that other people don’t.”

Jocelyn walks in, and ofc, she’s super gorgeous blah blah blah. This happens:

People always told Clary that she looked like her mother, but she couldn’t see it herself. The only thing that was similar about them was their figures: They were both slender, with small chests and narrow hips. She knew she wasn’t beautiful like her mother was. To be beautiful you had to be willowy and tall. When you were as short as Clary was, just over five feet, you were cute. Not pretty or beautiful, but cute. Throw in carroty hair and a face full of freckles, and she was a Raggedy Ann to her mother’s Barbie doll.

#letgirlsknowthey’repretty2018!!!! Alternatively, stop being fucking cowards and let your MC not be classically beautiful. Bc I’m sorry, we all know Clary is supposed to be gorgeous. Her biggest flaw is that she’s short??? Honey, I am 4 feet 11 inches, and I’ll be that tall until the day I die (unless I do one of those old-lady shrinks). Being short isn’t actually a fucking flaw, Clare’s just pretending it is. I’m just sick of this. Girls have to be beautiful, but they can’t know they’re beautiful. And they can’t be beautiful if it’s not in a thin, white-girl way. Here’s what I want: fat girls who know they’re gorgeous. Girls of color who know they’re gorgeous. Jewish girls and Muslim girls who know they’re gorgeous. Alternatively, I want girls aren’t gorgeous and aren’t described in such a way that we’re supposed to know they’re actually gorgeous. I want girls who don’t pass judgement on themselves at all. I want girls who can just be without having to fulfill some vision of beauty.

Bc here is what we’re supposed to take away from Clary’s description: she has striking red hair and pretty freckles. She’s short and slender. She’s cute and pretty. She just doesn’t know it. Gag me.

Ughhhh. Clary’s also clumsy, her second “flaw”. This isn’t a real fucking flaw!! A flaw is something that is actually detrimental to you, okay??? When you say, “Oh, this character is clumsy,” you’re really saying, “I’m too lazy to think up some actual flaws.” And Clare’s been known to plagiarize, which is a lazy person’s sin.

Jocelyn drops the bombshell that they’re, um…going on vacation. Jocelyn, Clary, and Luke are going to a place called the “farmhouse” in upstate NY for the rest of the summer. As any well-read YA reader knows, this is code for OH FUCKING SHIT WE’RE ABOUT TO DIE THEY’RE ON TO US THROW YOUR CLOTHING INTO A SUITCASE AND GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE.

Clary flips shit bc even though she earlier said school is only a few weeks away, the rest of summer is apparently really long now. She demands to know what could happen if she stays behind. Apparently the only way Clare can show that somebody is startled is by them dropping something, so Luke drops some picture frames. Ugh, totally not worth being startled over, Uncle Luke. He says he has to go, and Clary hears him and her mom whispering about someone called Bane. From now on, this is Bane:

I promise he’s more badass than anything Cassandra Clare could come up with.

There’s some more Shady Conversation between Jocelyn and Luke that Clary is too dumb to follow, and Luke tells Jocelyn to talk to Clary. It’s really weird that after years of protecting Clary they’re just gonna argue right in front of her, but Clare does what Clare wants.

This happens:

The door flew open. Jocelyn gave a little scream. “Jesus!” Luke exclaimed. “Actually, it’s just me,” said Simon. “Although I’ve been told the resemblance is startling.” He waved at Clary from the doorway. “You ready?”

;lasdlajlkajldljl So much happening here. For one, Jocelyn screams. Why is it always the woman who screams? Why was Isabelle the one shrieking? Why is it possible for female authors to be mysoginistc? Why does the world suck?

But my main point is that I think Simon is supposed to be likable? But honestly he’s just coming over as a real douchebag, so jot that down. Anyway, Clary and Simon fuck off. It’s a little weird that Jocelyn is just letting Clary go, but as we all know, Clare does what Clare wants. Oh, and Clary’s super rude to her mom as they’re leaving. The usual.

Oh, God. Another wonderful Simonism. As they’re going down the stairs, Simon says, “Jesus, woman, don’t rip my arm off.” I love, love, love when a female character is referred to as “woman”! Hahahaha nope. Not even as a joke. I think it’s dumb and sexist and argh. Simon is just proving himself to be a real treat. 

We learn that Clary lives in a brownstone that’s been divided into apartments and she and her mom share the building with a psychic called Dorothea.

“Nice to see she’s doing a booming business,” Simon said. “It’s hard to get steady prophet work these days.” “Do you have to be sarcastic about everything?” Clary snapped.

Hate to say it, but I’m with Clary on this one. Also, once again, Clare shows that she really doesn't understand moderation. Simon making a crack once in a while? Okay. Probably funny. ALL OF SIMON’S LINES BEING THESE ANNOYING JOKES?? NOT FUNNY. KILL BILL SIRENS EACH TIME. I’M TIRED.

WAIT, THIS IS NOT A DRILL. I THINK MAGNUS JUST WALKED OUT OF DOROTHEA’S APARTMENT??? YASSSSSS, HERE WE GOOOOO. Clary does the annoying thing where she’s like “am I remembering something?” but then doesn’t remember anything at all. Anyway, that’s the end of Magnus for this chapter.

We rejoin our intrepid assholes at a Mexican restaurant where Clary is angsting about her mom and Simon is cracking jokes. Clary talks about how she knows nothing about her mom’s life before her mom had her. It’s page 31 and nothing interesting has happened yet I swear to God. Simon’s like, “Haven’t you see all those scars your mom has?” and Clary’s like “What scars?” which we all know is bc she’s been mind-whiped or something. Clary ignored a call from her mom, which is exactly the thing to do when your mom is acting erratic and scared!!

They leave the restaurant and Clary thinks she sees a doll’s wings flutter. Simon complains about being the only boy in his band without a girlfriend. Save yourself, Clary! You suck, but save yourself from the Nice Guy™ anyway!! There’s a low-key homophobic joke:

“Pretty soon the only people left without a girlfriend will be me and Wendell the school janitor. And he smells like Windex.” “At least you know he’s still available.” Simon glared. “Not funny, Fray.”

And then Clary gets even worse:

“There’s always Sheila ‘The Thong’ Barbarino,” Clary suggested. Clary had sat behind her in math class in ninth grade. Every time Sheila had dropped her pencil—which had been often—Clary had been treated to the sight of Sheila’s underwear riding above the waistband of her super-low-rise jeans.

(source: https://tenor.com/view/batman-donotwant-animated-gif-4668582)

Look. I am not a nice person. I’ve been known to commit lashon hara, which is the Jewish way of saying being a big ol’ gossip whore. But I would never slut-shame. And I expect better of my female protagonists. This book is just so filled with girl-on-girl hate. And I hate girl-on-girl hate. I want girls building each other up. I want girls loving each other. I want girls supporting other girls, not tearing them down. I don’t want girls who only make friends with boys and then slut-shame other girls with them.

Oh, it turns out Eric the poet is dating Sheila. And we’re on our way to the poetry reading. Great! I bet we’ll meet her, and it’ll be slut-shaming goodness. Clary calls Eric a sexist pig for telling Simon to “just decide which girl in school had the most rockin’ bod and ask her out on the first day of classes.” I am totally in agreeance that Eric is a sexist pig. So why, perchance, is Simon FRIENDS WITH THIS ASSHOLE? This is the CLASSIC Nice Guy™. They always have a coterie of sexist pig friends to show how Nice they are in contrast. Fuck that. Actual nice guys, who aren’t Nice Guys™? They have nice friends.

Clary ignores a call from her mom and thinks about how much she’ll miss Simon while at the farmhouse even though she’s been nothing but annoyed at him since page one. The chapter thankfully ends.

[gensou-no-toshokan]

Hello. i was thinking What if azazel was secretly really good at singing and mugaru is tge only one that knows. But nina finds out :0 Do you think you can make something out of this

I think I can, but it’s gonna have to  be on a AU scenario.

“Goodmorning Mugaro!” He heard right on time - which was actually 5 to 10 minuteslate after opening - and he nodded at her, reading himself for the onslaught ofattentions from her.

This time is what just a ruffle on hishair and a tiny peck on his cheek which always had him feeling a little warmeron the neck, not that he ever thinks of Nina that way, but it was nice to be coddled on.

“I’m so sorry to be late again! But Istayed up late-”

“Sending texts, playing videogames andeating junk food I’m sure.” 

Mugaro didn’t have to turn to know whohad interrupted Nina so suddenly, it was the same person who was always thereto chew her on whatever fault she presented in any form or way. And as usual,Nina practically stomped, after blowing some smoke from her head and facedAzazel with all her unimpressive height to him.

“Grrr, No I didn’t! I was actually uplate catching on some reading for school!” She yelled at him on his face, andMugaro felt a bit guilty because even on her tip toes she could barely reachhis chin and it was funny how he had to hunch over to be at her eye level.

Mugaro never understood why they seemedto set on such a weird routine, or why while Nina was always cheery and readyto get along with anyone she always dropped this whenever Azazel was concerned,then she became petty, grumpy and in certain occasions, her language becamereally colorful.

Azazel on the other hand, most of thetime he was happy looking at most people as if they were something lowly hefound at the bottom of his boots or something equally gross, he loved to teasebut he rarely got worked out on anything they threw back at him.

“Why do you even care what I do in myfree time!”

“Because everytime you run late orbecome careless here, I’m the one who has to pick up your messes!”

Part of it was true: Nina was not themost… diligent of workers, she wasn’t terribly irresponsable to the point of norepair, but she tended to forget important details and her cleaning andorganizing skills were below par.

*DING-DONG*

“Good morning.” Mugaro heard from thedoor: It was an old lady, and she looked around almost as if she was lost, hishead turned to the still arguing duo but he didn’t have to do anything becausein one second Nina had shoved Azazel out of the way and she skimped happily tothe old lady, greeting here, asking how her day was and how he could help her.

That was truly her best asset as anemployee of this antique books store; someone could be just being curious orasking for directions and somehow ended up buying something or even in somecases became regular customers.

Azazel took care of inventory, cleaning,organizing, keeping the accounts in order and in some rare cases of dealingwith difficult people and providers, but his temper and selling skills weresomething dreadful.

Not for nothing he was the youngerbrother of the owner, if Azazel had terrible people skills - Half of the timebefore Nina was hired, he ended up scaring people off for the dumbest ofreasons - then Mr. Lucifer’s were non-existent.

How did these two convinced his motherof renting the building in the first place had always been puzzled him -although her words sometimes alluded to some unspoked agreement or favorbetween them - especially when they kept terrible track of paying the rent andproperty damage.

“It’s ready! Here’s your copy of thesecond edition of ‘Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland’, hardcover and pictures!”Nina called out and made the transaction with that huge smile of hers.

Nina maintained her pleasant face rightuntil the woman was out of eye sight just to turn around and sigh, 

“So lucky she had to go somewhere else,I feared that she would stay and chat for another hour.” She said dropping herface on the desk.

“She did?” Mugaro asked. 

“Oh right you weren’t here Mugaroright?” She said. “She was already leaving until I blurted out somethingabout never having a boyfriend and she started trying to set me up with hisgrandson!”

Azazel finally rose up from the placebehind the counter she had shoved him into, he looked a bit disheveled and asusual a frown on his face.

“Meddling old hag…” He muttered but Ninadidn’t seem to listen and kept talking.

“I mean I would’t have minded if thegrandson had been good-looking but…” She made gagging face and he giggled atit. “… I had to turn it down, I was afraid she would ask me again.” 

“Right, because you’re such a goodcatch,” Azazel snorted from behind her. “She obviously doesn’t know that behindthat ridiculously wide smile, there’s a lazy, dumb girl, with a sewer mouth,bad manners and who loves eating junk, can’t cook to save their lives, one whois so shallow ask to reject someone based on looks.” 

“You idiot… what’s so wrong about meknowing what I want in a boyfriend?” 

And there it went another fight betweenthese two, that turned into some shouting off and it either ended up with Ninacrying, Azazel locking himself on the storage room and pretend she didn’texist, or her slapping him hard enough to echo on the place. 

“I don’t have a problem with that, youdummy; I just can’t believe someone would think about you likethat.” 

Mugaro felt himself frowning, Azazel wasalways so nice to him, helped him with his homework, asked about his day,listened to him practice with the ocarina, slipped him some extra candies thathis mom had vetoed after dinner and even got him something for his birthday,then why couldn’t he be nice to Nina too?  For that matter why wouldsomeone who claims to not stand another pay so much attention to everythingthey do? Mugaro liked Nina very much, but even he knew that what Azazel saidheld some true to it. 

“Argh! What? You’re saying I’m hideous?!Just because you’re good-looking doesn’t mean you can say things like that!”

There was a heavy silence when Ninablurted this out and she was now covering her mouth with her own hands, herface looking like a huge tomato, Mugaro looked then at Azazel, dreading that hewould start poking fun at her or just tease her.

Instead he was looking to the side, thecorners of his eyes were stealing glances at Nina, and if Mugaro didn’t knewbetter he could swear there was a blush growing from the base of his neck.

‘What?…’ And it was like there was a beacon of lightilluminating this new angle for him, because now it all made sense… sort of,for people like them at least.

“…See? I knew you were shallow…” Azazelmuttered, but it was without any bite and he turned his back on both of them,pretending to be organizing a pile of books.

“…Pffft, If I was like that, then why Idespise you and your awful personality so much?” She said, looking equallysomber, and started to clean the counter, and Azazel gripped one of the booksso tightly that it almost looked like it would break, cover and all.

“Nina.” He raised his voice slightly andshe smiled at him again, but she looked sad. “Um… what type of personwould you like as boyfriend?” He asked and from the corner of his eyes, he sawAzazel froze in place.

“Mmmm,” She seemed to think about it fora while. “He would have to be good-looking yes, but he would also have tobe nice to me, I don’t even want some expensive gifts, he would just have tolike… help me study, ask me about my day, hug me and tell me I’m pretty.” Shesaid looking dreamily to the roof.

“I see,” Mugaro nodded in agreement, andfelt even more puzzled by why couldn’t they just see it, it was right there!

“…He would have to have a nice voice andknow how to sing!” She said perking up. 

“If I tell you I know a person just likethat would you believe me?” He asked.

“Of course! Tell me! Tell me!” She saidjumping up and down on her spot.

Mugaro felt a little brave and threw atiny smile at Azazel who had a panicky face right now. 

“It’s… a secret!” He exclaimed and thetwo of them face faulted on their spot. “But I’ll tell you… If you twotake me to the karaoke after closing, and you have to sing at least one song.”

Mugaro could feel Azazel’s eyes boringeyes behind his head, but he could not care less.

They would both thank him tomorrow.