#like even just comparing them to the hobbit movies the differences are clear

[werewolf-transgenderism]

the LOTR movies are just genuinely so fucking good. type of movie that we probably will never see get made again because sooooo much of it is just extremely detailed and intricate practical effects and real costuming like the armor!!! the sfx makeup!! the sheer number of people and horses!! and also it is focused on just doing a good job of adapting the source material rather than milking a franchise forever and ever which of it were made today would simply not be the case. movies of all time

[strawwritesfic]

Bard x Female!Reader: Angst

Summary: Victory, though sweet, can always be tinged with the bitter taste of despair.

Rating/Tags: T (Soap Opera Disease; character death; during canon; not canon compliant; not anti-Bard’s canon wife; reader is not Bard’s canon wife; The Hobbit; human reader)

Challenge: “160 Collective Drabbles” challenge by BobaPop on Lunaescence Archives.

Tag List: @imaginesfire​

Notes: Please take note that I wrote this long before -- Oh. The Hobbit trilogy started coming out in 2012? Well, it doesn’t matter when this was written as compared to the movie releases, because I never saw the second or third movies anyway. The point is, I’m sure that things were portrayed very differently in the movie than I have portrayed them here.

Angst

It was over. At last Bard could release the long-held anxiety that burned within his lungs. It was over. All was quiet, save for distant crying. All was still, save those already sifting through the rubble. All was peaceful, save for the fires that continued to lick through broken windows. The dragon was slain. Laketown was safe. It was over.

Ash continued to drift from the slowly clearing sky, sticking to his dark hair and lashes as Bard stood in what remained of the town square. The taste of smoke and soot hung heavily in the air. No helpful breeze blew through to clear it, nor to cool the sweat beading his brow. He could have moved, perhaps, and felt something other than heat against his skin, but he did not. For the time being, he could do little but allow his mind to reel.

“Bard!”

The voice of the town healer stabbed through the haze like a dagger. Bard turned to see the man running toward him, stumbling on fallen boards as he went. There was something about that and his tone of voice that Bard did not like. His heart thundered, though he knew not what could be more terrible than staring down a dragon.

“You must come now,” said the healer, and Bard heard it for certain this time: panic.

He was falling into step beside the man to race back the direction he’d come from before Bard even thought to ask, “What is it? What’s the matter?”

“It’s…” the healer hesitated, then finally finished with a quiet, “[Name].”

There was no need for further explanation. Bard’s heart gave a great leap once more, then seemed to fall dead inside his chest. Unthinking, he picked up his already considerable pace still further. “Is she worse?”

“Considerably so. All the smoke and the excitement. I-I do not believe she will be with us much longer.”

They had reached Bard’s home. It was not your home, but the building was closer, and it was there he had sent you earlier that evening when you had so boldly strode into the midst of the battle. He pressed his hand against the door, but found he had not yet the courage to step inside. 

“There is nothing you can do?” he asked quietly.

“Nothing more.”

“Then leave us,” said Bard. “I will send for you when…when I am ready.”

“Of course.”

Bard did not wait to see his orders followed. They would be, he was sure of that. Already the people of Laketown were treating him differently. It was not exactly what he had envisioned for his simple life of smuggling, but face the change he would–and face it as he always did: alone.

Grim-faced, he slipped through the house’s narrow dark halls. He ought to have been grateful that this building continued to stand, that you could be comfortable in your final moments now that your home was in flames. Grateful was the farthest emotion from Bard’s person just then, however. All he could think about was that blasted dwarf king and that cursed dragon.

“You made it,” came a hoarse voice from inside the bedroom.

Bard entered to find the snug room lit with the last scrap of candle wax to his name. So be it. He could think of no better use for it, and, if he had his way, that so-called King of the Mountain would be paying enough to have Laketown swimming in the stuff in due time. But that was a thought for a different time.

“I made it,” he agreed as he settled into the empty stool the healer had pulled up by the bed. “Did you think I would not come?”

You smiled the same soft smile he had fallen for at first sight, the same smile that had made him wonder if love could come twice into his life somehow. Even now, it reached your eyes. 

“How is everything?” you asked.

That was not an answer to his question, but Bard didn’t push. Instead, he reached for your hands that rested on the covers. Already your fingers felt cold. 

“The battle is over,” he said as he rubbed his thumb across your knuckles. “Smaug is dead.”

“The town?”

“Still standing. Most of it.”

“And the children?”

“Safe,” he answered. It hurt his heart to think about them. Sigrid, Bain, and Tilda had already lost their mother. Now on the cusp of finding someone to fill some of the hole left by her, that someone, too, passed on. Bard knew Tilda would take it the hardest; he dreaded telling her the news. “They will miss you.”

“I’ll miss them. And you. Most of all you.”

“You should not have come into the thick of things.” Perhaps Bard shouldn’t have said it. What was done was done. There was no changing your decision now, and you knew even better than he the fruits of your effort. “You were becoming well. Had you stayed put–”

“And burned alive without seeing you again? While the rest of the village died defending the town without me?”

“Smaug has been vanquished without you, and yet you lay dying,” Bard answered hotly.

He should not have been feeling so angry at your deathbed, but Bard could not help himself. Only now was the cold horror of seeing you out of bed, eyes blazing brighter than the fires the dragon spewed out, sinking in. There was nothing he could have done once he saw you; your death had been imminent from that point on. Only the thought of killing Smaug had distracted him.

Bard bowed his head. “Is this to be my reward? Losing you when everything should be rescued?”

A rough laugh spilled from your throat. “Maybe you’re right,” you said. “Maybe I just wanted one last adventure.”

Had you not seen him weep before? The tears had not yet sprang to his eyes, and still it was hard to force them up again. You smiled. Had Bard not watched you waste away these past months, he would not have known the pain you were in, would not have understood how close you were to fading away from him entirely. Your smile sweetened.

“I didn’t have much time left anyway. I’m glad to have spent the last of mine helping you, Bard. Not dying quietly in my own bed.” Slipping your hands out of his, you lifted one to cup his face. “You will be a magnificent king.”

“I never wanted the title.”

“I know. But now it is yours. I love you. I shall pass your love on to your wife when I see her.”

One of his hands lifted to hold yours against his cheek. He could not blink his tears away now, though his eyes were merely wet. Missing seeing you go would be unacceptable.

“I love you as well, [Name],” he said softly. “And I thank you. For everything.”

Grinning, you brushed your thumb against his skin. Over and over, and over and over, and over…and…over. Then nothing. The spark in your eye disappeared.  His breath came slowly in and out as he looked on, still grasping your hand. All warmth inside it was gone now. Bard closed his eyes before slowly lowering your hand to the bed. 

But he could not stay as he wanted. He could not even take the time to mourn. As you had reminded him, there was much work to do, and he was now the one to do it. He would not let your final words to him echo in his mind in vain.

[anneangel]

Controversy: The dwarves are better characters in The Hobbit trilogy, than in the book.

Although much criticized by fans for differences comparing to with the book, it is agreed that the highlights the movies gave to the dwarves was welcome. Ok, the book has deserved public love, I love the book, but that did not stop me from having criticism about parts of the narrative either.

In the book, the dwarves were much of my discontent: (1) starting with their number, 13, practically unnecessary when it is clear that none gain true development and are usually referred to in plural. (2) They are quite inappropriate for the journey, since they carry musical instruments and, when their combat skills are needed, are mediocre, they can not overcome any obstacle on the way, needing to be saved all the time (by Bilbo, Gandalf or others). (3) They are more greedy, there is no voluntary noble attempt to recover the kingdom, are more focused on the treasure that will recover than in the kingdom itself. (4) They do nothing really useful along the way, besides being grumpy, talking about treasure, music, doubting bilbo and needing to be saved. (5) Thorin is a petty leader, there is no real vocation, only his royal blood, if the narrator not inform us who he is, would not stand out at all, his character does not kill Azog (in Azanulbizar) not even Bolg (in BotFA), it only serves as a moral to show the evils of greed, to be able to recover and apologize with Bilbo in the end. (6) Their "plan" is that Bilbo steal how much of the treasure could be possible so that they could retain and then leave, if there are no miracle that kill the dragon, and even Smaug mocks this. (7) The dwarves have no plan, at no time in the journey, and not even against Smaug, they do not even see the Dragon, they are all the time hidden on the mountain depending on the service and salvation of third parties, Bilbo is the only one that values courage to go to Smaug (3 times) and the only one who encourages all of then to continue. (8) Bilbo becomes the "leader" in the end having to make decisions that would be expected of Thorin (by the way, Thorin was never a leader but in the title).

In short, it is not possible to like any dwarves in the book. Not even form a development paragraph for each of them, their acts are tiny and their amount unnecessary. When three of the royal family die in the end, the only consideration I had to regret was about the age of Kili and Fili, but despite that I didn't feel their losses like characters to whom I had attached (they had to have development for this).

On the other hand, the movies had ridiculous decisions: how to relive Azog solely to give Thorin a plot and various scenes of action, persecution, escape and unnecessary combat. When only Bolg would be enough...

...it is obvious that Thorin being much younger and less bearded, and Thorin, Kili and Fili being heartthrobs is just an attempt to please Hollywood and people who watch only for the aesthetic standard. It honestly doesn't bother me that they are aesthetically different from what they are in the book (but it might bother fans more focused on what the characters "should" look like). Lmao...

...it is also obvious that the producers and screenwriters only highlighted Thorin because they believed a badass character, warrior and with a sense of purpose (everything that Bilbo is not as an archetype of protagonist), soon the films transformed Thorin into a “second protagonist”, giving him many scenes, differing from what he is in the book. Are hollywood standards and commonly used in diverse plots dictating the rules of cinema again...

...However, heroes, bumbling and comic as the dwarves are in the movies, there is a greater prominence in each of them and their different personalities, as well as there is a greater sense of nobility and dream to belong when their desire is to "return and conquer the kingdom" (all the thing about Arkenstone like necessary to rule was stupid, but at least they had a better goal than "stealing from the Dragon and leaving if no miracle happens as the prophecy says"), and the fact that they are more prominent fighters in the movies is good too (although the overkill of the nonsense action scenes and the absurd CGI spoiled many of this scenes). They plot a plan against Smaug (even if it was a ridiculous plan, after all who throws hot gold in a fire dragon that loves gold? Ridiculous!).

But these are flaws of the movies and the book, as there was an attempt to cover very silly, too childish or unfounded holes in the book.

The criticism made here about the book, for example, are common in reading groups of The Hobbit: (1) bad development of secondary and supporting characters. (2) Dragon premature death (four pages). (3) Battle of the Five Army summarized. (4) Absence of female characters. (Note that these are points that the trilogy tried to remedy, but in a mistaken and misunderstanding way, unrelated with book, scenes that were pure filler rather than good Extra Canonical contains which would be more preferable).

* And even a child complains about these points in the book!!! So the justification "is a book for children" does not support itself.

* Much of the errors of the trilogy was in script, script decisions badly thought to the scenes (a pity, because I love the cast, the soundtrack, the costume, setting and lease).

I Would follow more the dwarves of the trilogy than the Hobbit's book dwarves.

Do I have criticism of the movies? Yes. Most of them because I love Trilogy, but the criticism comes because I know it could be much better than it was if the amazing parts of the book had been used more carefully and devotion. But I am also not extremist to the point of thinking that the book is perfect.

@anxious-alien-overlord , fantastic conversation we had about this, I owe this post to you ❤️

[sunnyrosewritesstuff]

The Marali Festival Commentary Part 4

Nearing the end! I hope you guys have enjoyed reading these as much as I have enjoyed making them.😊

**SPOILERS FOR THIS FIC BELOW**  

Chapter 10- Cooking For Each Other

Today was meant to be the least stressful day of the Marali Festival. The passion for your family. A day to spend together doing various activities where Thorin wouldn’t be required to be ‘King Thorin’ or to have to put on airs, but could just relax with the people who genuinely loved him. And then his sister ruined it.

I am the oldest of three myself. I have plenty of experience to pull from when it comes to writing sibling interactions. (This includes making one super melodramatic over minor issues.)

“Personally, I think you deserved a lot worse.” Dis sang.

On second thought, maybe Thorin didn’t want to celebrate the Passion for Family at all because at this rate he was well on his way to the ‘Passion for Ignoring People Altogether’.

Relatable. When my siblings and I get together, it is always 1 vs. 2 with the 2 picking on the 1. Fili slid in as a perfect substitute for Frerin to keep up the dynamic.

Thorin tried to remain neutral at the offer. On one hand, he wanted to accept the truce flag and try to get back to normal with the hobbit. On the other hand, he hated cooking. It wasn’t that he was particularly terrible at it, but he had grown up with cooks to do the work for him. Even after the fall of Erebor, it was easier to let someone else provide meals or to get a meal from the inn where he stayed than to get ingredients to make it from scratch. Bilbo, he’s come to learn though, loved to cook.

So I certainly lean into the fanon HC from time to time of Thorin’s inability to cook. But I actually HC that the few ‘spoiled prince’ habits that stuck with him through the years was he doesn’t want to cook. So he messes up on purposes sometimes so people won’t ask him to do it.

“I’m sorry.” Thorin stated.

“You’ve said that.” Bilbo remarked, but his tone seemed lighter than yesterday at least.

“I’ll say it as many times as necessary until I feel forgiveness is deserved.”

I sometimes worry that I make Thorin ‘too’ much of a jackass when he flies off the handle. So I sometimes feel like I overcompensate Thorin feeling guilty about it for days, weeks, months later. He’s a bit of the self-punishing type.

Chapter 11- Picture Time

There is NOTHING better than when your siblings enter a serious relationship, and you can pull out the baby books. This chapter was the Middle Earth equivalent.

“It is a high honor indeed.” Thorin stated gravely, his arms crossed. “None of your kind have ever been invited.”

I need it to be noted that, I love Thorin accepting Tauriel fics! I just like to play with different versions of him sometimes, and Thorin just had so much animosity in the movies that I couldn’t see him getting over it completely. He’s getting better though!

“Actually, Kili mentioned he learned his bowmanship from you, Your Majesty. I would be most interested to compare techniques as your nephew is quite skilled.”

If Thorin knew he was being played, he said nothing of it as he immediately launched into what seemed to be a well told lecture on the difference between dwarven and elvish bows. Bilbo had to hide a smile at Fili’s relieved expression and Kili’s over the moon eyes. Yes, this was quite a big step for the dwarf king, and Bilbo couldn’t be more proud of him.

See? Also, I need like...SO MANY MORE FICS talking about Thorin’s prowess with a bow.

He flipped to the next page, and Thorin couldn’t be much older than nine or ten, and while it was clear he was trying to sit still, you could see the mischief dancing in his eyes.

And in the category of ‘things no one ever asks me about, and I don’t offer up information even though I should’, so I actually mathematically calculated the relationship between hobbit, man, and dwarven ages. So when Bilbo says ‘nine or ten’, he means for a hobbit. Which is about 5 years old for a man, so 11-12 is Thorin’s actual age.😅 Why am I so extra?

Also, yes. I 100% believe that Thorin was a holy terror as a young child.

She heaved a large sigh. “I won’t do his job for him if that’s what you’re getting at, Master Baggins. No matter how much I worry he’s too thick to get it right. But, I wanted you to know, to me and my sons you are already family. And always will be.”

Bilbo felt an unexpected prickle at the corners of his eyes at the dwarrowdam’s kind words. He had always considered the Company his family, but it was nice to know the reverse was true as well. Especially from someone he did not meet until after Erebor had been reclaimed.

I love Bilbo and Dis interactions. Heartfelt included.

Chapter 12- Giving/Receiving Gifts

And FINALLY! The misunderstanding comes to light...

Bilbo even found the desire to wear just a small amount of jewelry in the form of a handsome silver brooch and ear cuff.

I like to believe the Company helped Bilbo pick out pieces in the treasury that would make him more ‘dwarven’, and Bilbo 1. being a bit of a clothes horse and 2. knowing the importance of fitting into society’s expectations would relent.

“Being king means he has a lot of apologies to pass out.” Bofur teased.

Bofur was clearly not exaggerating as the line of dwarves in front of Thorin was nearly out the door, and the dwarf looked positively thrilled with the development.

I imagine Thorin has to deal with a lot of people during the year, and he’s probably not as cordial as he should be.

Bilbo’s smile slipped almost immediately.

“That’s it?”

Thorin froze, and Bilbo could almost physically feel everyone suck in a breath.

Can you imagine what all these other dwarves are thinking? Like ‘oh what Shire custom did the king forget with his apology gift?’ or ‘Had he disrespected the Company’s Burglar twice?!’

“Master Baggins, Bilbo.” Tabor amended. “You…you have always been very kind to me, and I just want you to know that…you are a gem greater than any the Halls of Erebor have seen before.”

Bilbo was smiling the whole time until that last line. It rang with a vague sense of familiarity until it settled like a rock in his gut. He knew exactly where that line was from, and he could feel the blood draining away. No, no it couldn’t be.

The LEVEL of secondhand embarrassment here. Bilbo’s just like ‘please don’t do it, dwarf I see as a small child’.

“I would be the luckiest dwarf in all of Erebor, if you would consider courting me.”

What was Fili and Kili’s back-up plan if Bilbo had accepted just out of sheer awkwardness?? An AU for later consideration...

[ariminiria]

I'm curious, but may I ask what the major issues of the Hobbit trilogy were, please?

ohhh boy I could go on for ages... in fact, I think I previously made a whole post about it, let me see if I can find it

okay I couldn't find the exact post, but the two I rbed below me are a couple reasons. but, I'm going to be visiting the discord for this one bc I know I've definitely ranted about it there

but first, I want to start out by addressing an attitude I've seen since Amazon's fanfiction came out. a lot of people have started to point to the Hobbit trilogy and say, "see! it wasn't so bad! aren't you grateful for them now! we trested it so badly but we didn't know!"

to which I say: absolutely not.

more below the cut because this is gonna be loooong

that's like trying to excuse a turd in comparison to a post-taco bell night mess. one is more disgusting than the other, but at the end of the day, they're both terrible pieces of shit.

the Hobbit films didn't magically get better just because the Fanfic came out. it being worse didn't suddenly erase that trilogies flaws.

so with that clarified, let's get into what actually makes the Hobbit films so bad.

I actually think the first one is pretty good. It had potential and is easily fixable.

but movie two... it was all downhill from there.

where to begin... ah, the writing.

so, it's clear that the writing was attempting for the same tone as the original LotR trilogy. and while that may seem like a good idea on the surface, The Hobbit was written for children. the tone of the book is overall more light-hearted and adventurous. therefore, trying to force the more despairing-yet-hopeful, dark tone of the original trilogy already starts the story on the wrong foot. you get conflicting messages from the subtext because the film writers' vision is so different from the basic intent of what Tolkien wrote.

I like to say it this way: they were more interested in making a "LotR prequel" than they were in making a "Hobbit film adaptation". the Hobbit should've been one film, maybe two. but they clearly only painfully stretched it across three films like butter scraped across too much bread for the sole purpose of having just as many movies as LotR - but that one actually makes sense because the book is divided into three volumes providing natural breaking points and content enough for for three movies

now I own the extended editions of the Hobbit, literally just for the sake of owning them, and.... the first one? hardly "extended" at all. I'm pretty sure the extended Unexpected Journey is literally still shorter than the shortest THEATRICAL cut LotR film. it felt like the only material they cut was cut for the sole purpose of being able to sell an extended version.

also pardon my French but it genuinely makes me so angry-- there's this one fucking joke. this stupid. Fucking. Joke.

why would you hire a COMEDIAN to be in an epic fantasy like Tolkien?? Tolkien has funny moments but not Modern Comedian Funny.

this stupid. motherfucker. I am SO angry about this, he looked at a candelabra and fucking said MADE IN RIVENDELL??? I literally yelled over the movie for two solid minutes about that one, three word, throwaway line. it pisses me off more than the entirety of love triangle plot (we'll get to that later, don't you worry)

anways, I am taking deep breaths, I am calming down, we are forgetting about The Joke...

*ahem* now, let's talk about how the films look. first off, they filmed in 30 FPS. for context, the standard Frames Per Second is 24. 30 is typically only used for special effects such as slow mo, and even then youre better off using 60, so its essentially pointless in the end. this results in a weird, subconscious "off" feeling as you watch the movement on screen. everything just looks... not-quite-right, even if you can't put a finger on what it is.

the main visual issue is overuse of CGI. one of those posts I rbed below this has visual examples, comparing between the trilogies. namely, comparing between Lurtz and Azog the Defiler (who wasn't even in the books, btw. he was named dropped once, to say "oh yeah and Bolg, the orc leading the Orc army was the son of Azog the Defiler" and that was it).

the atrocious CGI sabotages any goodwill you mightve had for the production value.

the LotR trilogy was believable because of the well managed practical effects, with minimal and careful use of CGI. Peter Jackson said it was made like "a Kiwi indie film", and that simplistic yet passionate charm shines through The Hobbit, on the other hand, shot like any major hollywood production with approximately Zero indie charm, said "computers can do anything and everything, right?" and they just. Did That.

all the backgrounds are NOTICEABLY green screen. they're fuzzy and just. weird. im talking noticable green screen. there's even a behind the scenes set photo of Ian McKellen with his head in his hands, weeping, because he's surrounded by nothing but green fabric, without even another human actor across from him.

remember how I mentioned Azog? the orcs look like these weird, clay models that somebody ran through a computer program, and it's very distracting. not to mention, most of the orcs' acting is lost in the motion capture translation because CGI tech is constantly changing, whereas practical effects are what they are. theg stay the same and hold up consistently, making them far superior and able to last far longer, because CGI will inevitably evolve and be left in the dust (isn't that right, original Jumangi?) I once found a side-by-side gif of the original Azog actor in the motion capture suit vs the end product and I was absolutely gutted at how much of the intensity was lost. that same man, in a prosthetic effects costume? I have full confidence it would've been beautiful. but alas...

and i promised earlier that we'd talk about it, so its time to address that love triangle.

holy bad idea, Batman. you don't add OCs to someone else's work outside of fanfic period, but especially not to works like Tolkien. you just don't. heck, I even have issues with Legolas being in the Hobbit movies since he wasn't in the books! however, that could have been excused because he legitimately is Thranduil's son, and it would have been a neat fan service cameo, but with what they did to his character, it would have been better off not to have him at all. he had no business being so involved in the Plot, a simple popup in Mirkwood would've been enough

and then

then...... they had to do That. with Tauriel. Tauriel..... look, I get it, they wanted Female Representation™️, but. No. a multi billion dollar trilogy made to get money from nerds is not the place to crowd test your Dwarf/Elf/Elf love triangle fanfiction. that whole arc was also clearly time padding to have more material to justify 3 movies lol.

but, in addition, because of the love triangle/unnecessary Azog subplot combo, they ruined the depth of certain character deaths. Fili and Kili were meant to fall defending Thorin, and Thorin died three days later of his wounds, which is a huge part of his change of heart in forgiving Bilbo.

one thing that makes me laugh more than makes me angry is Kili's death. they try to make it all dramatic, like "oh no, Bolg has thrown the Strong and Dexterous Female Elf Warrior to the ground, and now he is going to kill Kili in slow motion" but like. she could have gotten up. she wasn't gravely injured, and she's like. an elf.

and it would have been so easy to fix this too, ignoring the fact that she shouldn't even exist. watch this, I'll fix it right now: she has almost fallen off the cliff, hanging on by her fingertips just the same way Gandalf did in Moria. she struggles to regain her grip to get to Kili, but before she can even get back up onto the ledge, Kili has been killed.

instead what we got: she's just like slowly writhing on the ground as Bolg deadass pauses for dramatic effect before slow mo shanking Kili with this giant spear that should have killed him instantly, but like he has enough slow mo time to gasp and groan and then finally mouth "i LoVe YoU!1!1" before mercifully perishing and escaping this trash movie. it's hilarious.

and don't even get me started on the weird sexual undertones they put between Gandalf and Galadriel, like??? that's a married woman my dude, why are she and the wizard making eyes at each other

anyways I'm sure there's more I could talk about but this is long enough as is. maybe someday I'll take all the footage of all 3 movies and edit it down into one single-film extended cut of What Could Have Been but until then I'm just going to keep rightfully trashing on this movie

[captainsspnanon]

C2E67 - Beyond the Eyes of Angels - rewatch

Fair warning, this one is loooong and rambly.

Well, while I still greatly enjoy CR, it’s clear that my hyperfixation stage of it has passed. It lasted a good two years before it calmed down, so that’s good! But it means that these rewatches end up going a lot slower, because I’m not binging 2 to 2.5 episodes a day. It also means that I jump between lots of media now, which is fun. :) I’ll be starting my re-read of The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings soon. I last read the Hobbit probably around 25 years ago? And LoTR was 21 years ago. I loved the Hobbit, my mom read it to me as a child. LoTR was a big struggle for me at first, I kept trying and giving up within the first book of the first book. I only ended up finally reading it all once the Two Towers movie was released, and binged them very quickly. Turns out it’s ONLY the first book of the first book that was a struggle for me, the rest was easy. So I’m really looking forwards to seeing how my interpretations of the story will change after two decades. (not going to be posting it, don’t worry! That’s just for me)

Oh wow. So this is the ad bit where Sam says he’s too depressed to do a bit, so they have a pre-recorded generic version – which is him acting like he’s dead and it’s his will. And after, I don’t know if I noticed this before!, Liam actually got hit pretty hard emotionally! I actually went back a few seconds to check, and it doesn’t look like he’s playing it up? I wonder if he had other stuff going on behind the scenes, or if this is just Sam’s particular ability to always seem to grab Liam by the emotions. (If I remember, he gets choked up both during the five year song, and the pandemic welcome back.)

It’s been a while since we’ve seen Codependent!Caleb. Even though Nott ended up still being invisible so the scene doesn’t work, I do like Liam having Caleb looking panicked and stressed flicking between Nott and the team, Nott and the team, until he goes after Nott. As much as I joke, I do wonder why Caleb is so stressed about Nott being separate at the moment. We know that he has faith in her, and she’s gone on ahead before a number of times. Is it because of the atmosphere of the tomb? Is it because Nott is sober, so he thinks she’s more likely to make bad decisions? I wouldn’t call it a regression in behavior, but it is a bit jarring compared to how he’s been interacting with the entire team for a number of in game months. ...Well, maybe not. The last time, I THINK, was in episode 54, when they split up the rooms and Caleb didn’t realize that he was going to be separated from Nott. Looking at critrolestats, I think that’s only a difference of 20 in game days.

OH GOD THIS IS THE SPIDER ROOM ISN’T IT I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT THIS AAAAAAAAA (i’ll find out in a few minutes if I’m right, but Matt describing things stuck around the wall, and one of the words he used was ‘sacks’, so I’m pretty sure I’m right) Interestingly, I WAS actually just the other day thinking about rogues in dnd – I’d seen some post talking about how rogues actually were bad at dealing damage unless the sneak attack critted, and I remembered Nott’s exciting sneak attack crit that basically took out the entire baddie. Of course, I couldn’t remember what the baddie WAS, but this brought all the memories rushing back.

One BS comment I have seen way too much of online is Laura being ‘entitled’ with her spells, being ‘whiny’ when things don’t go her way with spells, and trying to get as much out of Matt as possible. And here we are – with Laura specifically bringing up to Matt that the Bless that she cast would have faded by now and so not have been present with initiative. Something that had she not brought up, Matt might not have caught. No whining, no complaining, just playing fair. *sigh* I’ve gotten off of those places (aka reddit forums), but still some of the shit I saw just DIGS.

Poor Travis. I am very lucky that while I am thoroughly freaked out from bugs, I’m not bothered by situations like this. The figures don’t bother me, nor do the descriptions. I’m pretty good with seeing them in movies and such as well. It’s only 1) in real life, especially if they’re close to me or move fast, 2) if they are ON ME – my actual literal phobia is them somehow getting inside me (nose, ears, mouth), and 3) some of the really freaky videos you can see online where someone brushes a dark clump and it spreads out into a million spiders.

Beau attacks, misses, Matt barely starts to speak before Marisha rolls again, then she apologies and gives him the go ahead, he gives her the go ahead, and then she tells him he can do his description, which he then does, but keeps it short. A good sign of a good table, a player recognizing when a DM wants to speak and giving them the space to do so, AND a DM recognizing that a player may want to just get the attacks out and is willing to forgo the usual flavor speech. You love to see it! Mutual respect!

(coming back to this at the end of april) wait I’m only half an hour in? I thought I was way further than that!

OH WHAT. We have the red Ashton lopsided 6-sided dice here with Tal!!! I totally thought those were c3 only, I don’t recall seeing them before! Clearly he’s had them though.

ROGUE CRIT!!!!! I love how Sam is so astonished by it too. Are rogue’s the best class to get a crit on? I’d assume paladin would be up there as well with smite…. 20th level rogue can get 60 sneak at max, so 120 per CR rules, then plus weapon damage. Divine smite has a max of 6d8, so max of 96 plus weapon damage on a crit. Wait, does improved divine smite and another d8 on top of that? So 112? but do smite spells add to a smite, or replace? Like, if it was banishing smite, would it add 5d10 on TOP of that? Or INSTEAD of that? I’m thinking way too hard about this, especially considering I prefer spellcasting to melee for my own personal play. EITHER WAY – badass moment!

...I got distracted just watching it. There’s something so comforting about the humor in C2, the feel at the table is different than it was in both C1 and C3, and sometimes I prefer it. Don’t get me wrong, the balls to the walls punchiness at the table in C3 is great and leads to a ton of laughs, but there’s a nice balance in C2 that almost lends itself to the PCs as much as it does to the cast. I’m doing a horrible job of explaining it, but it’s pure comfort food for me.

Anyhow, yay for spell scroll for Caleb, but also I’m glad that it’s not some super amazing spell. It’s something where Liam wouldn’t feel like he was missing out or punished if he never found it, but it’s a nice bonus to have to where he feels rewarded for looking.

Once again my grumbles about the table attitude towards a rogue though. Caduceus wants to move forwards, but Tal/Cad has to tell Sam/Nott to search for traps. Jester wants to open the door, but Laura/Jester has to tell Sam/Nott to search for traps. There are times that I really would like to get into Sam’s head and see what his choices were for this. If he’d known how it would have gone, would he have picked a different class for Nott? Was he deliberately making a rogue who wasn’t particularly good at what she did, not because she couldn’t but because she forgot and didn’t care a lot of the time? It would fit with the housewife picture, but it’s a sense of almost spiting the class for the roleplay. I feel like with C1 and C3, Sam was able to explore his roleplay within the confines of the class, whereas C2 it feels like the roleplay just has the class slapped on top of it. *shrugs* It’s hard to say, because she does do a lot of sneaking around during combat, but it always feels a little forced. It’s much more Liam/Frumpkin doing early exploring than Nott, a lot of the time.

I really love how they discovered the stairs going down (this is the lightning one where Matt uses an hourglass, I think?), and I also love how they were able to so quickly and smoothly give the marching order. In the weirdest way, I do think the Nein ended up being the most smoothly combined group, which is very surprising considering they started out the most fractured. (also in fairness I really don’t have much recollection of this aspect of C1, so I could be totally wrong here)

LOL I love that Laura stands up and hits the mic, then Taliesin stands up and hits the mic, and then Sam stands up and hits the mic. They talk about how it had to be so loud for the audience, but either Chris the sound guy is REALLY good at his job, or no it’s not that loud at all.

(wait is this the episode where they have three encounters/maps and sam gets short [humorously] with the last dwarvenforge sponsor bit?)

(omg I’m only an hour and forty three minutes into this, we’re now in May. I don’t know why I’m watching this so slow, it’s SUCH a good episode!)

In the span of five minutes, Sam hits the mic AGAIN and Marisha, while bending down under the table, cracks the back of her head against in while coming up.

I have no recollection of the mist/wind spirit! I thought this was the electrical pulse! (I still think it is, and that’s what the timer is for, which honestly is a great method of using it. I know Matt used it a few times in C1, and I think this is the only time in C2, but I appreciate that while it’s punishing in an effect, it’s not massively punishing like they LOSE or FAIL if they can’t accomplish what they are doing in time. Especially because them asking Matt for clarifications eats away time, as well as Matt’s own turns. I’ve seen some detractors online wish that Matt pulled out the hourglass more, as a way to get the players to make decisions faster, but all I can think is that pulling out the timer means that it becomes even HARDER to think because now you have the external pressure as well as whatever circumstance you’re in. I can’t fully pooh-pooh the detractors as there have been a few circumstances where I have found that the players really dithered, either consistently during combat, or having ooc conversations during a quick event that took way longer than I thought Matt should have allowed, but I see people claiming this for so many things, including encounters where there may have been minor dithering but then moved smoothly, or one or two players turns took long but everything else was smooth.)

Beau jumping down = so fucking hot. Especially because she’s the first to break from the ‘run down and maybe action’ format which reveals the bottom tier allowing other players to start having more creative movement. (polymorph of eagles coming in five, four, three…) Hm, I trying to think now of how often Marisha is the red-button pusher. We know that Travis and Sam will go for it, Ashley’s pretty decent at button pushing, is Marisha the next one? ...I’m struggling to think of examples in all three campaigns, which could meant that no, she’s not, but it also could mean that I have a very shitty memory (well confirmed at this point).

Matt allowing Beau to both investigate and yank out the power source of the electric crystal is something that I think is a very table-specific decision. On the one hand, I love that he allowed her to do essentially two actions because she is a monk and able to do things very quickly (such as step of the wind, flurry of blows [I typed bleaus without even thinking what the fuck]), but on the other hand that can definitely feel bad at a different table with another player being allowed two actions where you may only be allowed the standard one. I genuinely am unsure of how I’d feel about it at my table, though that’s also because I have a really shitty attention-grabbing player at the table. If they were allowed the double action I’d probably be pretty annoyed, but if the really nice good player at the table were allowed it, I’d feel better about it. Breaking the action economy for a cool moment really only works when you have full trust at a table. Here, it’s a moment done well, with a group of players who fully respect the choice and decision (and are glad not to take additional damage XD), at a table like mine? ….I’d rather have taken the damage, tbh. (side rant, but last game I got to do some exploring as a water skimmer, DM describes to me what I see, players immediately start going off of the description and I’m like….alright, I guess I went back and transformed, lost my wild shape, and told them. Fuck me if I had other things I wanted to do, or even if I’d wanted to roleplay the moment.)

(also off topic, I read a chapter update today of a shadowgast fic that I’m enjoying, but Caleb is SO OOC it’s ridiculous, to the point where I’m like his canon backstory must not have happened in this fic, and coming back and watching canon Caleb is DELICIOUS. We’re not in an rp moment, but even the way Liam portrays using shield, the facial expressions and body language, it’s like YES this is the caleb I crave.)

There’s so many good tactics on display here. Fjord jumping with his held Misty Step, both polymorphs with Jester going back to grab the other party members, Beau investigating the door and finding the slot! There are small bits of metagaming that I just...eh. Would Jester have gone back for Nott and Caduceus if the hourglass had still been going? Maybe not, but that also can be explained by her seeing that the glow has stopped. Caduceus thinking that there’s no monster now? ...Honestly that just feels like Taliesin thinking ‘well we beat the encounter so we’re good now’. Usually I’m not too heavily bothered, even if I notice metagaming, but that bothered me just a little bit. I’m a tiny bit nastily pleased that the creature attacked again shortly after. ….I have a petty side, okay?

OH GOD IT’S THE START OF MAKING MY WAY. (I think someone found that it technically started in a one shot before this, but this is the first in game of a very very long running gag)

Interesting that Caleb flying down triggered an attack of opportunity from the creature, with Fjord, Jester, and Beau not triggering one. I wonder if Matt had specific ideas of where the creature was in the tower and this really was the first, or if he’s just been blanking because he was focusing on the electrical charge and this is the first time he remembered.

…..why does Sam want to know if goblins have tails? I want to know what he’s thinking! I can’t think of any mainstream depiction of goblins with tails, so it’s certainly a bit of an out-there thought.

For what it’s worth, while we all know and love Veth’s Big Naturals, I greatly appreciate and am entertained by Sam’s insistence that Nott also has Big Naturals, despite every piece of official artwork (presumably signed off by Sam) depicting Nott as smaller-busted.

I’m sure this was speculated about by the fandom at the time, but I wonder if Jester being so preoccupied with making sure that everybody gets out of the mist tower before she will leave ties back into her getting left with the young dragon back in the happy fun ball. I know Laura has talked about the impact that moment had on Jester, but unless I’m forgetting stuff (super entirely possible) I feel like this is the first time we’ve really seen Jester make an effort, putting herself at risk, to ensure that everyone else is safe.

Sam just did his usual bit when Matt went to get the map for the zombie room. I wonder what the section I’m thinking of is? To be fair, *I* don’t actually remember it, but I saw a post talk about it. AH – thank you CR Transcripts! It’s episode 79 “It's a fantastic company that makes a fine product and if you don't go to their fucking website, I'll kill you.”. Searching “kill you” under Sam worked. Based on context, rather than it being the ‘holy shit a third encounter’ that I thought it was going to be, instead it was just the pure stress and time crunch with Obann and the tree. Understandable.

I admit, I’m a bit exhausted with initiative. As much as I enjoy this episode (and I really really do!) three back to back combats, regardless of the tactical aspects of them, is just tough to watch. It’s the same thing for me for the really big episode long fights (Lucian, Vecna, etc). Four plus hours of combat is a LOT. I’m usually good if it’s two or less.

When Matt decides to just ‘roll with it’, it works out fantastically at the table. Jester casts Turn/Destroy Undead, which he has just impact the five undead that he had minis out for. After a bit of ooc clarification about the slopes and creatures on them, Laura asks if her destroy undead would have worked there too. In terms of the encounter, I’m pretty sure Matt saying yes or no wouldn’t have impacted the main combat at all, but he acknowledges the legitimacy of her point, rolls some rolls, and has a total of ten more get destroyed. Does it make the encounter any easier? It does trigger Caduceus seeing the glowing heart, but that would have happened fairly soon anyway, I’m sure. What it DOES do is it has the table let out a cheer at Jester being badass and destroying thirteen enemies with a single spell. It’s a feel good moment, rather than a numbers game moment, and even as a viewer it does exactly what it should do, it Feels Good. In comparison to the other GMs I’ve watched (Brennan on ExU and a number of D20 shows, Aabria only on ExU so far), he does roll with things a lot less, as he is a bit more of a stickler for the rules, so I notice the moments more. With Brennan a few times, and with Aabria in ExU a lot more of the time, I’d see Rule of Cool moments where, for my tastes, I would have preferred a harder RAW/RAI ruling. (again, no judgment to Aabria in Misfits and Magic or A Court of Fey and Flowers, I still have not seen those though I want to! Especially because I’ve heard her GMing style is very different in those other systems.)

Coming right off of Jester’s Feel Good, we’ve got Caleb’s Feel Bad. Very smart to do a fireball into the massive pit of undead, but then immediately after it fails to have any true impact at all. While I can understand the choice not to have it impact the number of undead spawning, I could see having that area be considered difficult terrain due to the flaming corpses, or simply just having no undead spawn at that specific area until the next turn – instead have them spawn on the other side. There was no actual benefit to Caleb casting the fireball, which is just a sucky feeling – especially with a third level spell. Especially because Caleb is the only one targeted by two undead, with anyone else only being targeted by one.

Double Feel Bad of Matt not letting Nott at least try to give the door a physical tug after expending her action using Mage Hand. It’s some inconsistent DM decisions this episode, considering Beau being allowed to inspect and grab and pull out the rod from literally just the previous encounter.

Granted, I don’t think any of the players are taking issue with this, or I’m sure they would always speak to Matt about it after game if it bothered them, but it’s things that I’m noticing that just feel just a bit sucky.

Off topic, but I’ve been seeing some complaints about C3 with the group talking over whoever is making the action in combat, and how rude it is and how it’s so bad in C3 and it was never this bad in previous campaigns. Meanwhile I’m watching the gang non-stop chitchat during the combats, I literally think the only difference is that C3 has better mic pickup than C2 or C1. I don’t think the group is being any more or less than they usually are, it’s just now sometimes we can hear them more clearly which covers up the audio of the main player at the moment.

LOL Marisha saying she’s never playing a wizard after seeing Caleb basically being the only one actually hit by the zombies. Double lol at Liam saying he’s only playing bloodhunters from now on.

It’s fun to see Sam clarify that Nott is running low on bolts, only six left! because we really only had one ranged combatant before with Vex who never needed to keep track of arrows – but only because she bought a thousand of them before the stream started. (I’m not counting Percy because he had to make his own ammunition versus being able to buy it in a shop.) I actually don’t think Nott ever runs out though, what with being able to collect them back after combat. Also interesting looking through the transcripts now that Nott/Veth always seemed to buy bolts in amounts ranging from 10 to 40. I’m not sure if Sam’s thought process was that Nott/Veth didn’t have a bag of holding for the bolts, or if it’s just the Mighty Nein vibe of buying what they need, as little as possible, versus the Vox Machina vibe of buying what they need and want in larger quantities than they may use. I love this little dnd-broke group so much. (also with all the transcript searching, bolt/bolts no longer look like actual words.)

...Did we ever figure out what caused the glowing hearts versus grey hearts? Critrolestats doesn’t know. I’m wondering if it was just DM fiat based on an estimated frequency.

One thing that I really love about M9 versus both other campaigns, this group somehow seems to perfectly convey that exhaustion and despondency. VM had a lot of grief, but it was always intense emotions, always a 9/10 or higher on the scale. M9 I feel is perfectly able to capture those days where you are deep in your feelings but it only shows as a 2/10. That’s such a horrible way of explaining it. It’s High Fantasy versus gritty realism, in a way. BH has it’s own frequency of emotions XD

IT’S BEEN SO LONG I literally forgot there’d be a Talks Machina after this!!!!!!! AAAH SO HAPPY.

[7spaceace7]

By Fireflies’ Glow (Bagginshield)

Soooo I made a Bagginshield fic based off of this post and it’s on my Ao3 if you prefer to read it there, but here it is! The firefly scene didn’t make it into the movie’s cuts, so I made it myself and made it gay for good measure.

Word count: 2237

Warnings: None, unless you count unreasonable amounts of pining

Rivendell’s magnificence only extended into the evening, after the last light of day passed over the mountains surrounding it. Streaming waterfalls cascaded over the cliffs below, leading into rivers and streams down past the elven borders. Dusk crept up on Eastern skies in parallel to the setting sun, until the moon above followed its path high into the sky. Where there was sunlight cast into the water, silver moonlight now shone upon its surface. Bilbo had never seen an evening so beautiful, not in all his years. 

The beauty of Rivendell had so captured him that the hobbit had spent nearly all his time wandering about the kingdom. While his dwarrow companions dined together, Bilbo explored the main halls of Rivendell, and the hobbit was quick to continue his self-guided tour just after Thror’s map had been translated. There was no doubt that Bilbo had fallen in love with the Valley of Imladris. He had to see as much as he could before their journey picked up once more.

At least, that was his excuse to distract from the real reason he had put distance between himself and the others. In truth, he did not feel welcome at their table. Bilbo was acutely aware of his outsider status to the dwarves; he may have been a contracted burglar of this company, but the hobbit knew he was still viewed as little more than a burdensome stranger without any experience of the larger world. The worst part was that he couldn’t blame them.

It was no secret he was inexperienced. What he had in his skills of gardening and baking (the best cakes from scratch in the Shire, you see), he lacked in the practical adventuring repertoire of sword fighting and travelling across Middle Earth. He was a Baggins of Bag-End after all, such respectable hobbits didn’t just up and leave on journeys with strange dwarves who ate his pantry stock.

But then, Bilbo supposed he wasn’t a respectable hobbit anymore. He had left that title behind as soon as he grabbed his signed contract and rushed out of his rounded door all that time ago. Instead, he was a member of a perilous quest to slay a dragon and reclaim a dwarven kingdom. However, the title of “adventurer” didn’t seem to belong to him either. 

Another rounded corner of the path led Bilbo to find himself back where his exploration had started in the gardens. He hadn’t meant to come this way again, but it seemed his feet had started wandering on their own when the hobbit became lost in doubt. Bilbo didn’t mind, though. 

The gardens of the elves were some of the most enchanting he’d ever seen. Hedges encircled the area, trees sprung up their lanky limbs that seemed to welcome all who ventured there. It was well-kept, organized, and filled with flowers of all colors he’d only ever seen in books. The colors seemed to glow by moonlight as well, transforming into translucent blues, purples, and greens. Bilbo used to daydream about places like these from reading his books, wondering what it would be like to live in a place where such beautiful things can grow. Lord Elrond’s offer of staying in Rivendell returned to his mind.

“Master Baggins,” Came the rough voice of Thorin Oakenshield, pulling the hobbit from his thoughts in surprise. Bilbo’s head turned to see that the gardens had already been occupied by said dwarven king, who sat upon the backless, stone-carved bench alone. He held an expression that Bilbo could not place. At the least, it was not a glare or look of disdain toward him as usual. “I was beginning to think you’d run off. You made quick leave after reading the map. You weren’t at dinner, either.”

“You’re right, I was..”The hobbit shifted to his other leg. The words didn’t find him to explain that he didn’t think himself welcome in their company. Exploring didn’t seem much like a Baggins pastime either, so Bilbo’s sentence hung unfinished. “I didn’t realize someone else was here. I expect you wish to be left alone, I’ll take my leave-”

“The others are resting,” Thorin said before Bilbo could take even a step away. His gaze turned away from the hobbit and back to the open trees. “I couldn’t find sleep.”

“...So you came here?” 

Thorin bowed his chin in a nod. The halfling recalled many sleepless nights of his own being comforted by the fresh air found in his garden back home. He allowed himself to wonder if this was something he and the dwarf had in common.

“I never took you for a lover of nature.”

Perhaps on better terms, Thorin might have seemed amused. “I assure you, I am not. The gardens just happened to be far enough away from the sounds of Bombur’s snores.”

“I see. It is rather peaceful. In the gardens, I mean.”

“Indeed.”

Moments of silence stretched between the unlikely pair while the two admired their surroundings, even if Thorin wouldn’t admit to elvish work capturing his attention. Bilbo remained awkwardly at the steps of the garden where he was first stopped. He didn’t mind standing since Hobbits had more resilience in being on their feet for long amounts of time, but to Bilbo’s surprise, Thorin made room on the bench beside him. 

The halfling’s lips twitched in figuring what to say, should he say anything at all. Finally he decided that he ought to try and test the waters. If Thorin was offering him a place to sit, he would take the opportunity and see where it took him. The Tookish part inside told him that this could be his chance to reconcile their strained first impressions. Bilbo walked over and took his seat at the far end of the bench.

“I have my own garden, back in Bag-End,” He started, after the silence became too heavy to hold any longer, “You might have seen it when you arrived that night. It’s certainly not as impressive as this, but then I’m just one hobbit compared to many elves. Besides, it has all the flowers I really need, all of my favorites. The Shire has perfect weather for my hydrangeas best of all.”

The dwarf didn’t speak as he watched him ramble. Bilbo didn’t think Thorin much the type for listening about gardening techniques and therefore spared the details, but a quick glance over to the dwarf proved that he was, indeed, listening. Still silent as ever, but this was a bit different. The exiled king seemed at peace for once. Like he was grateful to hear of a hobbit’s silly affinity for plants instead of a mountain kingdom to be reclaimed.

It was a sight Bilbo found himself having trouble looking away from. He willed himself to focus on the fireflies gathering around the bushes instead. 

“Gardens were not to be found in the mountain,” Thorin’s voice softened at the mention of his old home. He always regarded the Lonely Mountain with careful, almost protective, thought. Bilbo’s eyes settled back on the dwarf and clung to every word. “Nothing grows underground, of course. No grass or soil to grow it, and there was no true light, save for the forges and fires burning.”

“None at all? Did you never go outside..?” Bilbo asked. He had known dwarves were the type to mostly stay underground, but such a concept still seemed so foreign to him. Hobbits were known to spend practically all of their time outdoors, and there was light everywhere he could remember. Thorin, however, shook his head.

“Dwarves in that time were born into the darkness of caves. They grew used to seeing rock instead of sky, and I was no different. From the moment I could walk, my time was devoted to training, watching my grandfather as he ruled so I could one day take his place. Learning of the kingdom and its people, of how to protect and serve them, everything a young prince must know,” Thorin explained. His eyes cast toward the ground as he hunched over, deep in thought. It seemed a painful memory sprung from his words without his meaning to. “There was no time for anything but such duties, especially as my grandfather’s health began to fail...” 

Thorin trailed off with regret held in his eyes. 

“There was little I knew of the world outside of Erebor’s halls, and that’s how it would have stayed were it not for the snake residing there now,” The exiled king finished with bitten words. Bilbo shifted uncomfortably.

“I’m sorry to hear it.” 

“I have no need of your pity,” Thorin’s words were said without malice. Instead, they were filled with shame, like he believed he did not deserve sympathy. Like this horror was his fault, somehow. “Especially from someone who knows a very different life.”

“Actually, it doesn’t sound completely different.” 

The dwarf’s taken aback look was all he needed to continue.

“I mean, I certainly wasn’t an heir to a kingdom, but in the Shire you didn’t go much of anywhere else. Sometimes to Bree if you were the type, but that would get you odd looks from the rest of town, and by no means were you considered the respectable sort. In fact, I’m sure by now I’ve probably been declared mad beyond all reason, going off on adventures with strange dwarves and a wizard.”

The light brown curls framing Bilbo’s face bounced when he chuckled. Thorin found himself wondering why he noticed this. 

“Hobbits simply don’t care much for learning what outside the Shire borders holds. We don’t get visitors, and we don’t do any visiting of our own. So..I suppose in that regard, I understand not knowing much else but what expectations you’ve been born to,” Bilbo finished with a hesitant smile. It was a smile simply for Thorin in that moment, reserved for his eyes and his eyes alone. And yet, the dwarf looked away, startled by its intimacy.

“I see both our clans have deemed us mad, then,” Thorin said, clearing his throat to hide the sudden topic shift.

“How do you mean?”

“The other dwarrow leaders called our quest a fool’s death sentence. I made mention of it before we left your home, but in truth they did not use as-- encouraging-- words as I led the others to believe,” The words of mockery bounced back bitterly to the forefront of his mind. “They believe we won’t make it alive to even reach the mountain. It is why we take on this task alone.”

Bilbo’s mouth twitched in thought again. “Well,” He began, “Perhaps they’re right.”

Thorin’s shock bubbled up instantly, paired with a list of insults in Khuzdul that he had half a mind to repeat from the aforementioned dwarrow council. The hobbit knew that look and raised his arms in defense.

“What I mean to say is, yes, perhaps you won’t reach the mountain, perhaps that’s how we’re fated to finish, but,” Bilbo took a breath, calmed his nerves, “It is still a noble cause to see through the end. And I know each of those who’ve followed you this far would agree. Anyone who doubts you hasn’t got the courage to see it as such.”

Thorin’s eyes softened. He looked down at the smaller creature, such a curious thing by anyone’s standards. A hobbit of the Shire, fond of books, green gardens, and the comforts of home, and yet it is he who has remedied his doubts of his birthright. 

“...Thank you.”

Bilbo simply nodded. Even if he himself wasn’t fit for this journey, he truly did hope these dwarves would succeed. They’d all lost so much when their home was taken from them. Especially Thorin. Thorin Oakenshield, who’d braved unfathomable death and destruction and still stood, facing up against an almost impossible task. And here he was, thanking a small hobbit for mere words. 

Their lives could not be more different-- and still, they were familiar. 

A soft, shining glow from the middle of the garden grove brought their attention away from one another. Dozens and dozens of fireflies had snuck their way closer and completely surrounded the pair on the bench. Their patterns blinked and glimmered for all to see, with shimmering water nearby to exemplify the view. Thorin, surprisingly, was the one captivated most. His cobalt blue eyes shimmered from their reflection, trained on their light.

“Perhaps you were right. About us being raised too differently,” The hobbit mused. A smile tugged at his lips as he watched the king become a prince again. “I don’t remember being so enthralled by the nightly fireflies.”

Thorin chuckled. A small, but genuine, bout of humor. Honestly, it almost shocked  Bilbo into the next age.

“Forgive me. I suppose I just never stopped to notice them before. Not in all my journeys across Middle Earth,” His smile lingered. Bilbo’s brightened. 

They held such a gaze for some time in comfortable silence. At first meeting, Thorin had sized up the simple hobbit for a commoner, unfit for the wilds of the journey the company had planned to cross. And perhaps that was still the case. Only time would tell if Bilbo was truly a loyal member of this quest, but for now, they had this moment to share.

That is, until Gandalf’s voice was heard passing along the bridge mentioning the dwarven king by name.

[telemna-hyelle]

Beef u say??

Do tell

Eh, it's mostly that most of the dwarves in the hobbit don't feel like the ones in the book. Like, I get there's the struggle of trying to make 13 different characters distinct, but I felt like they a) made a bunch of them more hobbit-like than dwarf-like in appearance (in my opinion anyway) because everyone loves hobbits (WHERE ARE THE BEARDS. WHERE ARE THE BEARDS, I SAY) and then b) realized their dwarves didn't really feel like dwarves anymore, panicked, and said "oh i know how to make anything more dwarvish! let's make them ridiculously crude"

Like seriously.

Take Gimli for example--he might be a bit grumpy and even belligerent at times, but in the book he's one or more of the well educated and well-spoken manners of the fellowship, in his own way.

Compare this to, oh let's say, DAIN IN THE MOVIE. Or just how the dwarves comport themselves in Rivendell. Just because Dwarves and Elves have issues doesn't mean they'd treat their host's house with disrespect! What about the laws of hospitality???? It's completely against their culture and their nature. It's poor worldbuilding. Worse, it's ripping off good worldbuilding and substituting it with poor worldbuilding for a couple cheap laughs.

To be clear, I don't dislike the movie dwarves as characters. I think they're great characters. But I don't think they really make good dwarves, at least not all of them all the time.

[with-the-same-tattoos]

I think the fundamental difference between the hobbit and lotr is the target audience. The hobbit was written for kids with this slight cyclical undertone, bilbo comes off as quite naive to me at least, kinda for kids to project themselves onto, and becomes a story about reevaluating the trust between yourself and the people around you, even if you care for them, which is a pretty good thing for kids to learn.

Lotr however was written for cynical adults, and the purpose for me at least was to allow downtrodden adults to add a bit of whimsy and joy back into their lives. You get beat down a lot when you’re older, and when you’re younger, everything seems great, both books aim to restore a bit of balance in their target audience, which reflects through their adaptations.

As someone who watched the hobbit first, it’s a lot better viewing experience when you’re a young kid huddled into the local cinema with your entire family (seriously there was like fifteen of us for all three movie releases, my grandma was fuckin hype), I fucking loved the barrel scene, and I still do. It’s probably one of my favourite fight scenes ever.

However, I wish the movie had worked a bit harder on goofy aspects, tonal dissonance is definitely a bit of a problem on reviewing for me, and also just not dragged poor Orlando Bloom back. Legolas does not need to be there. He’s not there in the book. It’s just weird.

I love the Hobbit movies, they’re flawed but I feel like people compare them wayyyy too much to lotr. They may be in the same universe and contain linked characters, but the books are fundamentally written for different people in different stages of their lives, and that shines through the movies.

Kinda like how the Silmarillion is written for people who want to suffer.

^^^^^ i think you have a lot of good points here!!!! Again, I DID ENJOY the hobbit movies. They were fun!!! I think Thorin was a lot of fun- I wasn't expecting to enjoy him as much.

I haven't read the books yet so I can't be too specific what I think abt the difference- ill get back to that when I have but itll take a while to finish, I think 😭💞

I havent, this far, however felt like lotr is cynical????? I think it might be like a difference between how we two see the word!!! Not sure. To me cynisism feels like that "well, nothing matters, things are shit for the sake of being shit" type of nihilism, and Hobbit comes to a lot closer to that w SOME of the characters, specifically in the water-town-whatever. I think i just mainly didn't like the town leader & Alfrids inclusion. It might be unfair of me to compare, but it is. Seriously such a stark contrast to having Théoden (cursed to silence and afterwards hindered by doubts of his own power and of loyalty, feeling alone) and Grima (clearly desperate for something; approval by others; coniving and cruel but made so by desperation) vs. dude likes gold & dude likes gold.

I might be hanging onto this one point bcs of my. MASSIVe crush on Grima, but 👁 — 👁 im not a professional movie critic I'm a dude w a crush on fuxkinh Grima Wormtongue from Lotr.... 💞💞

Anyways, yeah, idk, that just felt OFF to me. Idk id the books will have the same thing, but if they do, I gta say, not super into it? Maybe im being pretentious askinh for more complex characters in childrens media but AgAIN. The reason I was so enamored w Grima as a kid was. He was complex. That was interesting.

And you defi get that w the dwarves in hobbit!!! I'm just never a big fan of drawing clear lines between the enemy & the protags. I don't like othering evil characters, m a big believer in that seeing them as someone like us makes us understand that anyone can make bad choises, and makes us concider our own choises more?

I think the comedy to both of us is the issue. The baddies were mostly used for comedy, and the comedic parts were the least fave for me in general :( dunno.

I also have a mild weird thing for uncanniness and weirdness in movies. vISUALLY im more into Lotr; the weird constant fake moon light, older cameras, and i love the orc makeups..... augjdjj.. just more for me. But hobbits were fun!!!!

Sorry im rambling this is incoherent but u had fun thouthts so i thought id share some of my own ; v ;

[cristalknife]

On Comments, feedback anxiety on both the writer and the reader’s side

 If one could look into  my WIP draw, or take a glance at the fics I’ve actually posted, it becomes clear misunderstandings based on miscommunication is something I seem have a thing for. In all honesty is more of a lifelong study and recurring theme I keep stumbling on or consciously walking into. Preface: I am only human and mistakes can happen, but usually I try to handle the detailed label (also referred as Read the Tin or as written on the tin) of major warning with my writings that is usually missing in any other aspect of life, sort of a lovely user manual/preview so one could know to walk away before getting invested or worse triggered. 

Or at least know exactly what they signed up for.

Is it perfect? No but at least it’s there, as a writer I did all I could to avoid unpleasantness, the rest it’s up to the reader’s discretion. Which leads me to the heart of this post: comments, feedbacks, criticism, politically correctness, manners and the anxiety they produce in both the writer and the reader. 

The picture is big so I’ll divide in sides, but remember that people are made of multiple sides, and sometimes those sides are at odds or outwardly warring against each other. That’s pretty average for any irrational human being with emotions.

From the POV of an overthinking anxious writer:

1)  Ao3′s Kudos are sort of like a watered down thumbs up, after about 4-5 fic posted (or ~15K words of stories out there to be consumed), they became the kind of anxiety triggers feeding thoughts of why so many people/guests left a kudo but the story wasn’t good enough to warrant the time of a comment/review 2) Comments are lovely reminder someone found something in your words that made them react so strongly they felt like sharing that reaction with you was worth their time. 

2.1) Comments are also the cause of anxiety about their content before you have the courage to read what they says...

3) Criticisms and feedbacks can be a wonderful tool to improve your writing for the next story. But not if they are laced with insult, personal attacks in that case they are the kind of black hole that pushes people to stop writing all together, or at least stop sharing what they write. 

4) single emoji (♥), 2 char long (<3) comments takes years of effort and a lot of conditioning to remember to slip in reader mode and appreciate the effort it took to stop and do even that, instead of allowing doubts to gnaw at the back of your head with waaaiiiiit that’s all? was it good? was it bad? arrrghhh what does it even mean??? 

5) Statistics and numbers, those are the evilest of the most buggering things and the most vile tempters that will push you to compare your stories against others (a futile exercise in frustration and pointless reason to shred one’s own self confidence to the tiniest of pieces for literally nothing)

5.1) Especially when you have two writing mind frames: 

 writing the stories you want to read (and usually it is either a niche where you’ve already consumed all you could find so you write it because duh, more content might ignite back the fire please, or you haven’t found yet someone to say it how you want to read it) vs what I simply call 

 exorcism writing (the kind of free therapy exercise when something is bugging the heck out you and not leaving your mind so you put it down to words and then let them fly free, instead of trapping them on a diary you’d just return to read and start the vicious cycle all over again)

5.1.1) and your exorcism stories become more popular than the stories you want to read, because at the end of your raw ranting exorcism you managed to write something that would end up falling within mainstream tropes. Which just makes you sad because those were not the result of love and planning and endless hours of writing and editing that you put in your other stories.

6) I’m not writing fan fiction to be an educator, it is possible that my day job is being an educator, but unless I’m there writing textbooks, as a writer it is not my responsibility to teach the reader something that has to be authentic, realistic and a good practice. I’m just here to tell a story.  Or are you really telling me that you watch superheros movies and series and expect them to appear outside your window? If you just laughed then why are you looking at fanfic smut with the expectation of finding a more interesting and alternative way to have a sex ed lesson? If you subscribe to the school that a story has has to make sense... Let me ask have you ever read some of the greatest literature works like Frankenstain, Moby Dick, The Hobbit, Journey to the center of the Earth, Alice through the looking glass, Aeneas, if you did and subscribe to “fiction as to make sense” then please please enlighten me I’m rady to sit back and hear all the points you can make how any of those are realistic representations of how things go. If you  says that those are just stories told oh so long ago... Lets pick more recent ones, the Harry Potters books, Goosebumps, Twilight, The Shadowhunters Chronicles, 50 shades of , all those are listed as fiction  which yes sadly too many used as a portrait of theme touched in there as realistic because the story was not set in a fantastical world and made the mistake of treating a work of fiction as a documentary... Sorry people I’m a writer, choosing the right words matters, words meanings and definitions matter please  learn to think critically, and learn your words, there is a difference between fiction and documentary  6.1) At the same time it might be that I am the kind of writer who loves to add factually authentic things in my writings, someone who actually had spent hours and hours on research to make sure that what they have been writing is not utter and complete made up rubbish, and that’s ok too. I do not expect readers to assume it is correct or that it is purely made up, and if someone is curious they could use the comment to ask a question, I’ve never turned out a curious question, even when it was difficult to answer it

7) Just because I am writing about something, it doesn’t mean I support it...  Again those are stories, not a scientific report on a lab experiment, I can write about abusive relationships, doesn’t mean I support them, I could write about self harm or depression, doesn’t mean I am encouraging those behaviors, in fact those usually come with a Trigger Warning, why? because a reader should have the option to walk away from what should be just a moment of pleasure and relax, not finding themselves triggered because I didn’t want to spoil the surprise of what was going to come in a story posted on the internet... 8) This far I’ve personally chosen to not push for comment, no beg necessary, I decided years ago to be the kind of self centered bad ass who writes for themselves, who’s not going to dangle the promises of more chapters in exchange for comments, I dislike the practice, and I find too exhausting shouting left and right hey hey I’ve written this read it read it... So I do get why my stories do not have such a large audience, it doesn’t help I’ve actually posted way less than what I’ve written over the years. I do welcome comments, though I have no clue on how to respond to short ones, or a single emoji/<3 to all chapters to those I end up answering only to the most recent one of that person and thank for their support. Longer comments are easier to answer because it gives me something to say back or comment/thanks for, though it becomes weird for me when someone speculate on future developments in what they wish to see, and since I’ve recently adopted the policy of posting only completed stories (even for the chaptered ones that will not be posted at the same time, the number of total chapter is not an estimation it is exactly the number of files I’ve divided the story into for reasons) because I do know whether something of that sort will happen or not, and I don’t want to put someone out of my story if they are too invested in see what they imagined happen... Though as I do write stories I’d like to read I’m quick to encourage aspiring writers to feel free to take that what if and work with it, just to please mention that my story inspired theirs and that I’d love to see what they come up with. Constructive criticisms, I do not have a beta for most of my works, I do not work too well depending on other people’s time, I confess even in the past I received criticisms that were not constructive if we push the boundaries and call those criticisms rather than just plain old complains, which is sort of the reason why I stopped explicitly encouraging communication. Because I do expect respect, you don’t know anything about me or what I believe in, you might make some guesses from my profile because I haven’t been shy and pretty open on them, but I won’t accept being personally attacked or talked to in a disrespectful manner just because you didn’t like what I wrote. I have no problem accepting criticisms, as long as they are criticisms and not just whining. You cannot come to me with “I hate your story” and leave it at that, you already took the time to express your opinion instead of simply walking away, the least you can do is explaining why... Otherwise I seriously don’t get why you wasted both of yours and more importantly my time and energies... From the POV of a spoonie reader who barely has the energy to read: 1)  Ao3′s Kudos are a life saver that allows you to show your appreciation (even if you are allowed only one as registered user) with only a click (and some times even that click takes so much out of you) instead of relegating you to invisible reader, barely visible number (*coughs*ff.net*coughs*)  or forcing you to make a story a favorite/followed 

2) Comments are the source of anxiety, because you might want to show support but would they get that or would it sound strange? will the author understand that a a ghsafdgsakdjfh (read: key smash) happened with excitement and love and you’ve no other words to express it? 2.1) also trying to put your support in words when you are in your pj cozily being a blanket burrito and reading from your phone in bed because there’re no more spoon left for the day it’s hard 

3) The author asked for R&R, or welcomes comments and constructive criticism. You loved the story enough to spend energies to

point out things that were plain plot hole or downright inconsistency or lose ends, pointing out botched translations from your own mother tongue and offering correction that were not google translated, in ao3 case pointing out lack of some appropriate tags, which would have 1 improved your story’s visibility and 2 allowed the reader to choose whether they wanted to read it or not both points that would have benefit you as author...

Only for the author to react: 

- badly with a why are you such a nitpick hadn’t anyone told you that you should just stay silent if you have nothing nice to tell me? - Excuse me you’re the one asking for my opinion not my adoration, I gave you exactly what you asked for, if you cannot handle your work being nitpicked or the holes in your plot being publicly poked then there’re fabulous people called Beta reader who will give you the needed dose of though love in private get one..

- badly with a don’t like don’t read -  legit reader’s counter point is  I wouldn’t have read it if you had given me a way to know then what I discovered now  [personal addendum, on a not that well low energy day it takes me less about 3 mins and half to read 1.5K words don’t came at me on your 1k long story and tell me I could have stopped reading when I noticed it wasn’t that good for me...I was done with it before I could get any warning]

- dismissively because a meet cute  clearly is an AU  - Bless your heart if you need me to point out to you that there is a difference between an Alternative Universe (AU) and a Canon Divergence and the fact that   meet cute is a trope  which in fandoms usually implies different circumstances within the fandom’s canon world  of the first meeting between the characters in the main relationship but doesn’t automatically include different premises for the character example: 

in canon: characters from a magical supernatural fandom one a wizard with magic, one a fighter with superhuman speed and holy weapons, in their first meeting the fighter saved the wizard’s life. 

in a meet cute:  a wizard and a fighter with superhuman speed and holy weapons meet in the middle of the forest where the fighter was hunting for food failing miserably and the wizard took pity on the fighter and offered to share their dinner, if the fighter dared to step inside the wizard’s home

in a No Power/Human AU meet cute: where there is no magic, one of the two is a barista who uses flirty coffee jokes lines to call the other’s person order, and finally discover they are an accountant so instead they start using math puns to get the accountant’s attention. 

Those are all valid stories but as an author don’t came at me believing that just because you mention a trope that is enough to distinguish between the 2° and 3° examples, or that having mentioned the trope gives you the standing to look down at me if I do have my own reasons that you do not know about  for wanting to read only stories like the second pitch and get upset but still tell you in a polite way that there are missing tags in your story, especially when you’ve falsely advertise your 3° like pitch as if it was a 2° one and I get upset and let you know about it and do so with the curtesy of signing it with my name rather than leave an guest/anonymous comment 

- shrugging off issues with the tags with a Oh but I’m bad at tagging  -

then I have 3 things to say to you buddy one) that’s not an excuse if you haven’t learnt how to do it yourself get a beta, get a friend, read more and compare what your story tells with a similar one and how that one is tagged, there’re ways Ignorance is not an excuse; 

two) you can’t claim you’re bad at tagging but then refuse to listen when someone is pointing out to you more tags for your story, dud learn how search engines work, searching by tag is basically having a filtered search, the more tags your fit your story the more venues your story can appear in reader’s search for something to read... which means visibility for your work, are you really telling me that you dislike to have that and would prefer less people reading what you post? then sorry but I think you’re doing it wrong and should get a diary instead, not post them on the internet.

addendum: still claiming to be bad at it after having posted over 40 stories and all posted in recent times in the span of a couple of months, just suggest you lack the intelligence to learn how to do things. Which only encourages me to never ever get close to your works, certainly to never promote or share them if not actively discouraging my friends from spending their time on them.

three) and guess what?  there is a frikking I'm Bad At Taggingtag for that too!!!

As a reader I might be ranting in this post, but the long effect of those is a growing apathy and increased unwillingness to spend my energies for commenting unless I’d really really really really liked or loved a story, or I have something more than a one liner to share, which while I intellectually know it might be unfair to let the whole pay for the disrespect of few, my own survival instinct is glad I’m not spreading myself even thinner...

truthful disclaimer: in all fairness it has been my experience, that those reactions usually come from authors with already quite few stories or a decent word count out there. 

New authors are still very much enthusiastic and happy about even the smallest crumbs of recognition or encouragement, which in return is lovely because it recognise that my own time and energy as reader are worthy, that it does take effort to share an opinion or encouragement or suggestion.

4) The author might never know how that day I posted that single emoji, or two character <3,  it was one of those bad days when even opening a small water bottle to swallow down the painkillers was too much, when using a finger to scroll down the page to reach the end of the story had wiped out more energies than I could really afford and yet I still pushed myself to leave a sign that I was there and appreciated their story

5) readers should be allowed to have the “if you thought writing was hard, try commenting other people words” tag...  because sometimes especially on older platforms (yes ff.net I’m looking at you) as a reader I can’t find the energies to wipe up something to say so I become a silent invisible reader. And sometimes it’s really that I am able to stand only stories with certain characteristics, personally for example I do not have the emotional fortitude to read more a certain amount of Work In Progress at the same time across multiple fandoms because my brain can’t recall all the details and I might not feel to rereading the story from the beginning every single time there is a new chapter... 6) Maybe it’s because I’m way out of my teens, maybe it’s because even in my teens and before stories were my safe place, my escape, I do not expect things to be factually correct in stories, but I am a logic driven person, I will see those plot holes and I might even poke through 'em if I find your story good enough that I feel it would be a pity not pointing those things out. You cannot tell a classic vampire story (not the twilight kind of sun sparkling vampires but the sun burn me to ashes kind) and have your group of vampires prancing about at noon of a clear summer day without some sort of reason for that to work. I promise you, I’m not picky, I will accept ridiculous reasons like they were standing under and umbrella covered from head to toes and none of their skin was exposed to the sunlight, but do put the effort to give me a reason why I should believe it was intentional, or do not cry and complain if I do decide to point out dude you’ve normal vampires that are sunbathing and did not become piles of ashes that’s not plausible... 7) Stories are just that, something to listen to, they don’t have to have a moral for them to be worthy of being shared, they don’t have to be a mirror  of your thoughts, or they could be a mirror of your beliefs, and if I am commenting on them I’m commenting on the story itself not your connection to it. And I do need you to advertise in advance if there’re things that might be triggerish, because what might be  just a mental exercise of stepping outside your shoes, if not done might result in me walking into a panic attack while maybe I was just recuperating for one and trying to find comfort or a distraction. While I as a reader cannot know you author and where you come from, unless you want to make an ass of u and me do not assume you know where I am or what path I’m walking in my life as a reader.  8) I despise people telling me what to do, especially if I didn’t ask for an opinion... If someone (who doesn’t have an economical or authorative position over me) demands me to do something the chances I’ll be do it, especially if I was going to do it before, become nil instantaneously. I’ve been running and lurking in writing circles and fanfictions for closer to three decades at the time this is being written, and from the very beginning I found disgusting and deplorable the practice some authors adopted of bargaining reaching certain numbers of comments/kudos in exchange for the next chapter. I can respect an author saying I don’t want to get this or that, but the final result is that most likely I would walk away without commenting even if it would have been a story I would have otherwise supported. There’re few authors I do know personally, at least superficially through other channels, that have this kind of disclaimers and I still comment. But that’s because I have an appreciation and will to support the person themselves who also happened to be authors. 

[agirlunderarock]

How I accidentally wrote 20 page paper on Boromir for one of my Final Ever University Papers PART 3

 Okay folks so I think we’re a little more than halfway through? I think??? I don’t freaking know this is the exact same feeling I had while writing the paper-

Will I ever come to an end? 

We just don’t know

If you missed Part 1 and Part 2  just click the text and it’ll take you to the link

So where did we leave off last time?

I told you exactly how academics where taking a crap on the goodest boi and so this time I’m going to explain why Faramir is the better character foil. Because instead of using Boromir as foil for say Aragorn or Sam, I say they should be using Faramir. I think specifically I left you guys with this lovely little picture I made myself of their character arcs:

If you can’t read it, I’m sorry its pixilated, thats just how the program gets when you try to make an image that compact to fit on a large presentation poster with an already large image. But anyway the important thing in this image isn’t whether or not you can read the damn thing, no, its that Boromir and Faramir’s character arcs are nearly exactly the same.Boromir and Faramir face political, and familial pressures, and faced with the question of what to do about Frodo and the ring. Both brothers are introduced in places that are supposedly out of their element. Boromir is seemingly described as more prepared for battle and fighting, yet we meet him in a council meeting of all things, and Faramir who is supposed to be #intellectual we meet after he and his men have just conducted a raid on an enemy patrol. They’re later both faced with questions of doubt and what they feel they need to do to protect their people. Denethor asks a lot of them and it takes a toll in some way shape and form. but the main points of their character arc ultimately come down to the conflict of family, country, and the fellowship.

like okay I’m not gonna lie, I really just want to put this picture in here and I have a funny story about how this picture made it in the research project but basically even the movie backs up that Boromir’s real foil is Faramir.

shit what was I saying?

Oh yeah

so basically in this flashback from the two towers we get a good side by side comparison between the brothers. Clearly they look alike, but look at how they’re dressed. Boromir’s in full armor my dudes, sword looks like its partially out of the scabbard- but really the main thing you need to focus on is the costuming in this shot, because the costuming here is, of course a reflection of their roles as military leaders, but also a major reflection of their personalities and really how their character arcs play out as a whole. Boromir is usually on the defensive (note I say defensive not ready to throw down) not just in battle because Mordor is like constantly like “Knock Knock can we come in?” but when he gets the Rivendell too, he’s being defensive because it almost sounds like these people half way across the world are going to forsake his home and the people he loves. So yes, I’d say my boi gets to be a little abrasive and wear emotional armor. He’s got a lot of feelings and he doesn’t get to talk about them because either 1. he’s with his troops or 2 he’s surrounded by people he doesn’t know that well i.e. the fellowship early in the story.

Faramir on the other hand is wearing some pretty light armor. He’s more open than Boromir, and if I remember correctly its said in the book that Faramir had taken to talking with Gandalf often when he was young and stuff- I don’t remember tbh I’m at that point where I haven’t read a book in a year cause I’m so damn tired, and I get canon and fanon mashed up sometimes. But what I’m trying to get at is, Faramir lets himself be open to more ideas, to more people, he’s more trusting of people’s intentions probably that numorian thing that he and Denethor have tbh. So basically what I’m trying to say is the main difference between the two brothers is how they deal with fear and anxiety.

Again Boromir tries to hide and swallow his fear and anxiety- he has to as a military leader shit happens. Faramir, looks for as many plans as he can to relieve some of his fear and anxiety- he’s also a leader shit happens.

So remember back when I said that Aristotle said some bullshit about how betraying your father is like the shittiest thing a person could ever do ever? Or when I said the heroism through obedience is absolute bullshit? If not too bad that was your reminder, though I genuinely don’t remember if I talked about the latter.

Denethor becomes the focal point of how these characters are compared. I say this because there is never a moment in the books were we actually have a conversation with all three of them present, but we know that he makes the same demand of both of his sons, that being find out what Isildure’s Bane is and then find a way to protect Gondor by any means. Not necessarily a bad request, its just HEAVY and the way its delivered in Return of the King is heavy and hurtful. I sir I know your mad stressed but also

YOUR SONS ARE MAD STRESSED SO CAN YOU PLEASE NOT HAVE CONVERSATIONS LIKE THIS:

“‘Your bearing is lowly in my presence, yet it is too long now since you turned from your own way at my counsel. See, you have spoken skillfully, as ever; but I, have I not seen your eye fixed on Mithrandir seeking whether you said well or too much? He has long had your heart in his keeping.

‘My son, your father is old but not yet dotard […]

‘If what I have done displease you, my father,’ said Faramir quietly, ‘I wish I had known your counsel before the burden of so weight a judgement was thrust on me.’

‘Would that have availed to change your judgement?’ said Denethor. ‘You would still have done just so, I deem. I know you well. […]But in desperate hours gentleness may be repaid with death.’

‘So be it,’ said Faramir.

‘So be it!’ cried Denethor. ‘But not with your death only, Lord Faramir: with the death also of your father, and all your people, whom it is your part to protect now that Boromir is gone.’

‘Do you with then,’ said Faramir, ‘that our places had been exchanged?’

‘Yes, I wish that indeed,’ said Denethor. “For Boromir was loyal to me and no wizard’s pupil.” (Return of the King 794-795).

Like thats a big load for two dudes to carry man

Like I get it but thats heavy and I cri for both my bois having to deal with this war their whole life

 But you see what I’m getting at here. Theres a lot of expectations for these boys, and really they just need hugs, and I need a hug rewriting this part into non academic language because it makes me BIG SAD

But whats interesting about the expectation that his sons only be loyal to him, is that in attempting to obey their father, THEY GET FUCKING WRECKED. Boromir ends up scaring Frodo to the point the Fellowship breaks up, and Faramir ends up like almost dying and gets his men wrecked. Now I’m not saying Aristotle is full of bullshit, but he’s full of shit, and I’m gonna learn you why.

So before I say which critic actually puts everyone else to shame by praising two hobbit bois, let me make this clear: Boromir does not die trying to obey his father, he dies actively disobeying him. Instead of trying to find Frodo and still get the ring like Denethor would have wanted, Boromir goes dies defending Merry and Pippin. HE COULD HAVE LEFT THEM IN FAVOR OF GOING AFTER THE RING BUT HE’S A GOOD MAN WHO WANTED HIS HOBBIT CHILDREN WHO ARE TECHNICALLY JUST AS OLD AS HIM TO GET AWAY AND BE SAFE AND HE DIED. Faramir on the other hand nearly dies while trying to carry out his father’s orders and thats tragic but again- shit happens.

According to no braincells Aristotle, one of these is right, even with the tragic outcome and one is wrong and deserved to die.

WRONG

In Ian Romuald Lakowski’s, "Types of Heroism in The Lord of the Rings," he acknowledges that through Merry and Pippin there is heroism in DISOBEDIENCE. For Boromir and Faramir this means obedience or disobedience is not a simple right or wrong choice, and in both of them being disobedient to their father is a more sure sign of their heroism.

I mean think about it, the very action every critic characterizes Boromir for is based off of his obedience to his father. He’s villainized for trying to take the ring from Frodo, when the reality is, the man was struggling with trying to figure out what the right course of action was. ITS THE SAME REASON FARAMIR TAKES SO DAMN LONG TO FIGURE OUT WHAT TO DO WITH FRODO AND SAM. THEY DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO.

So what ends up happening? Faramir is praised a good guy for disobeying, and really in the end the real Boromir comes back when he disobeys Denethor too.

But we’ll come back to some of that in a bit,

Because STRESS is not enough to bind these two as better foils than other comparison that can be made. Because again, critics like to praise Faramir and elevate him and I’m not about to put them against each other.

Like despite their differences Boromir and Faramir’s relationship with one another isn’t characterized by fear or power or even that #stress but genuine love for one another. And this is important, because though no critics ever sighted a page for their reading of Boromir as a greedy little shit, I believe their interpretation comes from second hand accounts of his character. Instead of actually looking at what he says and does to be his true self.  They characterize Boromir by his single action of trying to take the ring from Frodo instead of looking at him as a whole.

Boromir’s relationship with his brother is incredibly important because given the circumstances and everything that they’ve been through and even though they have very different thought processes, they should have a rocky relationship, but  they don’t. They have a very good relationship.The appendices give a nice description of the things we never got to see happen in the book

“…there was great love, and had been since childhood, when Boromir was the helper and protector of Faramir. No jealousy or rivalry had arisen between them since, for their father’s favour or for the praise of men. It did not seem possible to Faramir that any one in Gondor could rival Boromir, her of Denethor, Captain of the White Tower; and of like mind was Boromir” (1032).

Actually

I take it back

Never say never get to see because in the council of Elrond, Boromir literally shows us his relationship with his brother and what kind of person he is. 

“ Therefore my brother, seeing how desperate was our need, was eager to heed the dream and seek for Imadris; but since the way was fully of doubts and danger, I took the journey upon myself,” showing that he willingly put himself in danger to protect his little brother (The Fellowship of the Ring 239).

The reason I bring this up is because I don’t think critics look at what Boromir actually says and does through out the book. I literally don’t understand where or how they would even perceive this as an ulterior motive or that he does anything with ill intent. AT THIS POINT THERE IS NOTHING THAT SUGGEST HE MIGHT BE. BECAUSE LITERALLY EVERY ACTION BOROMIR TAKES IS TO PROTECT SOMEONE ELSE

 Like maybe they take the first description of Boromir to be negative:

“a tall man fair and noble face, dark-haired and grey-eyed, proud and stern of glance,”

But none of these are inherently negative. Proud and stern aren’t negative words. Proud doesn’t become negative until you pair it with the action of taking the ring from Frodo and THATS ASSUMING that he’s taking it for himself to use and that he himself wants power.

BUT HE DOESN’T- and we’ll get to why later

OR maybe they’re trying to take what Faramir has to say about his brother to the extreme end: 

“‘And this I remember of Boromir as a boy, when we together learned the tale of our sires and the history of our city, that always it displeased him that his father was not king. “How many hundreds of years needs it to make a steward a king, if the king returns not?” he asked. […] Alas poor Boromir. Does that tell you something of him?’

‘It does,’ said Frodo. ‘Yet always he treated Aragorn with honour.’

‘I doubt it not,’ said Faramir. ‘If he were satisfied of Aragron’s claim, as you say, he would greatly reverence him. But the pinch had not yet come. They had not yet reached Minas Tirith or become rivals in her wars” (The Two Towers 655 ).

Which I’m gonna be honest is fair assessment.  But like Boromir’s asking these questions 1. as a kid, and as I myself was a child who hated incompetency, ITS CONFUSING AND FRUSTRATING TO BE DOING ALL THE WORK AND NOT GET THE CREDIT? (RIGHT NOW I’M LOOKING AT PEOPLE WHO REPOST FAN ART WITHOUT THE CREDIT- I WILL FIND YOU AND SMITE YOU)

but anyway, yeah you know what that question about kingship tells me- HE WANTS TO KNOW WHERE THE FUCKING KING IS???? Like thats not inherently a greed thing- Only if you’re looking at it from like a religious standpoint and blah blah blah Catholic teachings about- but again

Then good boy Frodo looking out for him, I’m gonna cry, points out the obvious- that Boromir respected Aragorn, and Faramir has the nerve to say- yeah but wait until the group project falls apart- then see what happens

and let me just say

Faramir

sir

my boi

YOU CLEARLY HAVE BEEN LUCKY ENOUGH TO HAVE A GOOD TEAM FOR YOUR GROUP PROJECT BECAUSE LET ME TELL YOU. IF ARAGORN WENT IN THERE AND THINGS STARTED GOING WRONG AND PEOPLE STARTED DYING OF COURSE BOROMIR WAS GOING TO BE PISSED- LIKE THEY WAITED HOW LONG FOR WHAT????

It’d be like if someone you didin’t know came over to your house told you not to make dinner in your own house, that they knew their way around the kitchen- WHEN THEY DON’T KNOW YOUR’RE ALLERGIC TO PEANUTS, proceed to start a fire while trying to fry up some chicken, and then saying they’ve got it under control, but the fire dept can’t put out your oven. I mean thats worst case scenario.

I’m sorry but just the thought of someone I know/am related to coming into my room and touches my goddamn light switch gives me anxiety- BOROMIR HAD TO TRUST THIS STRANGER WITH HIS COUNTRY 

But like the movie tries to get you to agree with the line of thinking, that Boromir is about himself and doing it to glorify himself. take THIS SCENE

You know the one, that shot in Rivendell and Boromir is exploring on his own and casually picks up the sword, you know THE SWORD and kinda low key plays with it for a hot minute- you know, the way you walk by the nerf swords at a walmart and you pick one up to wack your bro with it, but then you remember you’re 23 and he’s 18 and taller than you now so he’ll beat the shit out of you if you start shit. But anyways, Boromir picks up the sword and cuts his finger, is amazed that its still sharp, and then puts it back only to have it teeter off and he walks away quickly like nothing happened. If you’re a small brain critic you’ll see this scene and say “Ah yes, in picking up Narsil Boromir displays a desire for power for himself, and in cutting his finger it shows that this desire is his ultimate demise. He might think he’s ready for power and deserves more, but by walking away he shows that he’s actually irresponsible guffaw” I demand you go back and read that in your guadiest accent. But hear me out. Remember that nerf sword you picked up in the toy aisle, instead of being the grimlin you know you are deep in your soul, you take a few practice swings for your audition fantasy and put it back and start walking away just to realize that the walmart employee had been watching you the whole time and the whole bin of plastic and foam swords comes tumbling down bring with it a Hot Wheels track and collectible cars, and you just look at the employee, and they just look at you, and then you brain just short circuits  and so you keep walking down the aisle away and laugh cry across the store because you don’t know what the fuck just happened. And thtas the energy that scene gives to me.

But I’m getting away from it all because the real arguement against the way this scene is framed is one question he poses right before he attacks Frodo:

“What could not Aragorn do?”  ( The Fellowship of the Ring 389). 

He makes a big speech here about Frodo giving up the ring, but he doesn’t talk about him using it himself, instead he wonders, What would Aragorn be capable of?

Does that sound like a question someone crazed with a drive for power would ask?

I don’t think so

Why even mention Aragorn if he wanted it for himself right?

We’re dissect the fuck out it in the next part don’t you worry.

I think I’m almost done

[thegreatdivorce]

There and back again...

This post is about a lot of things, but it’s mainly about my love for Faramir and Eowyn… and about how the book is always better than the movie. But we have to go back a lil before we can start. 

I read Lord of the Rings for the first time when I was 14 years old. It took me a long time to get through it. I think a whole year, maybe more. I had trouble for a few reasons: one, it’s a big story for a young reader, and two, my motivation was probably in the wrong place. I grew up on a healthy diet of C. S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkien, my dad read the Chronicles of Narnia series to me as a kid and I read The Hobbit (on my dad’s special collectors edition) not long after that, but I never made it to Lord of the Rings until the films came out. And I only really read the books then because I loved the films so much. Let me repeat that with more emphasis, I loved. these films. so. much. I could recite lines from the movies, yes, but I could also recite lines from the commentary the cast created for each extended edition. I can still recall the jokes, pranks, and memories the cast hold dear almost as if I had lived through them myself as the 10th member of the fellowship. I still call David Wenham ‘Daisy Wenham,’ and if the word ‘wig’ appears in conversation my brain immediately goes to, “your hair changes dramatically from short to long… do you wear wigs?” If you don’t know what I’m talking about, you are not a true fan of the film series. It meant so much to me when I was younger that I think I started the books as a way to stay in that world a lil longer. And I guess constantly comparing the books to a beloved film series is not the best way to read because I didn’t enjoy them as much as I thought I would. To be clear, I didn’t dislike the books, Return of the Kings marks one of the few books to make me cry (Theoden’s death got to me), but the books didn’t impact me in the same way the films did. 

Fast forward some 13 years later and something, I’m not exactly sure what, convinced me to read the books again. I have a long book list, one that I am sorely behind on, so choosing a 1000+ page saga (one that I’ve already read before) while other books are waiting to be cracked open for the first time was probably not the most productive decision I’ve made, but I regret nothing. I still own the same copy of LOTR I owned when I first read the series and man, there’s something about the smell of a book that can bring you right back to where you were when you first opened it because that’s exactly what happened when I started re-reading it. There is something nice about feeling like you’re 14 again… feeling like your whole life is ahead of you, but the only thing you have to worry about is reading this one book. 

Although the smell of the book felt the same, other things felt different. Aragorn does not struggle at all with the idea of his kingship like Viggo does in the film, Sam feels a bit more of a simpleton in the books, and Frodo seems older and wiser than the 19-year-old Elijah Wood feels in the movies. All of these things are small differences and as I was reading book one and book two, I found I still liked the movies for what they are and tried to be (although that scene where Frodo tells Sam to leave just before Shelob’s lair, that he doesn’t need him anymore, will never make sense to me), but for the most part I liked both film and book fairly evenly. But entering into book three, I realized how certain characters got the short end of the movie stick. Particularly Eowyn and Faramir. I’ll be frank, I don’t know how you would have written more of them into the story without bogging down the pacing of the rest of the movie, but that’s kind of my point, Eowyn’s story is so good she needs her own dang movie so everyone can discuss how amazing and complex she is. And Faramir too, but we’ll get to him in a moment. 

Eowyn in the movie is played wonderfully by Miranda Otto. Seriously, the casting of this series is pretty near perfect. Her part is relatively small, but they touch on all the main points of her character. She’s a fierce warrior, but she feels stuck in a cage staying at home having to care for her people and the man she considers a father all by herself, she falls for Aragorn, he doesn’t return her love, she wants to ride to war, she does so secretly, she kills the Witch-King, she receives the honor and valor she has always wanted, she marries Faramir, bada bing, bada boom, done. It’s a nice lil package, but it’s the highlight reel because there is so much more to Eowyn than that...

So to know Eowyn, we have to know the people of Rohan. Faramir does a nice job summing them up when he refers to them while talking to Sam and Frodo in The Window on the West, “If the Rohirrim are grown in some ways more like to us (the people of Gondor), enhanced in arts and gentleness, we too have become more like to them. For as the Rohirrim do, we now love war and valor as things good in themselves, both as a sport and an end. We esteem a warrior, nonetheless, above other crafts.” Faramir continues to talk of war “as is the need of their day,” a necessary evil, but you can tell... he’s really not into it. This is shown in a few different ways throughout the books (his relationship in contrast with his brother/father as one example), but the place it really hits home happens earlier in the same chapter when he states this zinger, “War must be, while we defend our lives against a destroyer who would devour all; but I do not love the sword for its sharpness, nor the arrow for its swiftness, nor the warrior for his glory. I love only that which they defend.” (Side note, Faramir is the best and I know everybody loves fawning over King Viggo Aragorn, but y'all are sleeping on the best man in the whole series! Faramir is where it is at. He’s far more complex than Aragorn and I will fangirl over him more later on, but we’re still on Eowyn, so I’ll continue.) So the people of Rohan are a proud, fierce, war-loving crowd. They actually sing songs as they are killing people in battle. Think “whistle while you work,” but fiercer and more insane. But Faramir is not dissing them; he is not implying they are war-hungry, or war-mongers, simply the Rohirrim believe proving themselves in battle is a right they deserve. 

Enter Eowyn. In contrast to Faramir, who seems to have a sober understanding of war and battle, Eowyn finds her worth in it. We can see this most obviously in her attraction to Aragorn. In the movie, their attraction seems to develop in a natural, innocent way. I vaguely remember Miranda Otto mentioning in some interview for the DVD special features that part of the reason why it’s so tragic that Aragorn turns Eowyn down is that he knows they would make a good match. Essentially if Aragorn hadn’t met Arwen first, Aragorn and Eowyn could be together. Honestly, with how the movie presented their relationship, yah, I get it. Except that’s not how it is in the books. Aragorn, in The Houses of Healing, looks to Eomer and says, “I say to you that she loves you more truly than me; for you she loves and knows; but in me she loves only a shadow and a thought: a hope of glory and great deeds, and lands far from the fields of Rohan.” Eowyn desires the great deeds of war, not like Faramir does: as a means to protect a people, but as a way to prove herself. Faramir seems to find an honor in all crafts and positions, but Eowyn, although protective of them, talks lowly of her own people, consistently stating she is not a “dry-nurse” or a “serving-woman” but higher above them as a member of the House of Eorl. Eowyn speaks of a hierarchy within Rohan, consistently placing herself above the other women who are care-takers or mothers. What makes this even more tragic is that it’s not entirely her fault that she has come to this thinking. Gandalf, again in The House of Healing, explains to Eomer, “Think you that Wormtongue had poison only for Theoden’s ears? ‘What is the house of Eorl but a thatched barn where brigands drink in the reek, and their brats roll on the floor among dogs?’ Have you not heard these words before? My lord, if your sister’s love for you, and her will still bent her duty, had not restrained her lips, you might have heard even such things as these escape them. But who knows what she spoke in the darkness, alone, in the bitter watches of the night, when all her life seemed shrinking, and the walls of her bower closing in on her, a hutch to trammel some wild thing in?” It’s tragic. And what’s worse is Eomer’s shock in thinking about his sister in this light. He never really knew her. No one did. Eowyn has always been fighting alone. Which is what makes her conclusion so satisfying... 

Eowyn rides into the Battle of Pelennor and kills the Witch-king (with the help of Merry). As I mentioned before, this is covered very well in the film, there is the great “I am no man” line which is taken from the book and although Eowyn is injured it seems she finally got her chance to defend herself in battle, like the other able-bodied men, so we’re meant to rejoice at her triumph, which I did when I saw the film. Except, again, that’s not the point in the book. Obviously, it’s great that the Witch-king is dead, but that event is the rising action leading into Eowyn’s healing, not her resolution… because Eowyn still wants to die in battle. She survived the Witch-king, she is being forced to heal her wounds in the House of Healing, but all she wants to do is die. Die as King Theoden has just done in battle (crushed by the body of his own horse) because this is the only way she can achieve the honor she feels she deserves. Because, again, Aragorn won’t give her that honor. And Faramir challenges this notion directly to Eowyn when they meet each other in the House of Healing, “You desired to have the love of the Lord Aragorn. Because he was high and puissant, and you wanted to have renown and glory and to be lifted far above the mean things of that crawled on the earth. But when he gave you only understanding and pity, then you desired to have nothing, unless a brave death in battle.” And it is only here, with Faramir, the first person to really see Eowyn and challenge her openly, does she acknowledge the truth, and her darkness (her desire for death) passes. It’s so beautiful. Eowyn exclaims, “Behold, the shadow has departed! I will be a shieldmaiden no longer, nor vie with the great Riders, nor take joy only in the songs of slaying. I will be a healer, and love all things that grow and are not barren.” And if you find a sadness or a disappointment in Eowyn’s proclamation of a life of peace than you are not paying attention to what Tolkien is putting down.  

This is important because I’ve heard this complaint before… Tolkien is not saying that it is wrong for Eowyn to participate in battle, to be a shieldmaiden, because she is a woman, (there are multiple instances in the book where Eowyn is described as a worthy warrior alongside her male companions. Hamma, may he rests in peace, nominates Eowyn as the person to manage the. whole. kingdom in place of the king when Theoden and Eomer leave for Helms Deep. So there’s that.) Tolkien is saying it is wrong to glorify battle, death, and destruction. full stop. No matter who you are. It is a point that is continually being made time and time again throughout the whole series by almost every character. And it should be no surprise coming from a man who fought in the first world war and then lived through the second. “I will not take joy only in the songs of slaying,” is really what Tolkien is trying to drive home here. Eowyn is still a warrior. Right after she accepts Faramir’s proposal and Aragorn is crowned king, Eowyn is like, “Faramir, I love you. I’m gonna marry you. But I have some important business to take care of back in Rohan with my brother, so I’m gonna leave… I’ll be back in like a month probably. Bye.” Yes, girl! That is the moment we should be applauding. Not the moment where Eowyn kills the Witch-king, but the moment where Eowyn realizes herself as a warrior but also a healer and there being a time and honor in both of those crafts if they have a proper foundation. It’s the moment when Eowyn finally sees and knows herself. And you know what Faramir says in response to Eowyn’s leaving? Nothing. He lets her go to do her thing because he is the best and I love him.

On to Faramir!

Ok. So. I’ll be brief here. Or I’ll try to be. One, because I think I’ve already shown a fair amount of Faramir’s great qualities, but also because I think his character in the film shows a stronger resemblance to the book than Eowyn’s. If we can all ignore that scene where Faramir drags Frodo and Sam to Osgiliath (because that never happens *eye roll*), and focus on the dialogue dealing with his dad, we’re getting pretty faithful Faramir content as pretty much all of the Faramir - Denethor dialogue is taken directly from the book, and it’s all golden. And when I say golden, I mean deadly. The, “‘Since you were robbed of Boromir, I will do what I can in his stead. If I should return, think better of me, Father.’ - ‘That will depend on the manner of your return.’” exchange between Faramir and Denethor is brutal. To say that Faramir has daddy issues is an understatement. But that brings us up to an important point. Faramir is just as broken as Eowyn is and their meeting is not so much so Faramir can save Eowyn but for them to find healing in each other. 

Faramir’s dad is insane. Literally. By the end of the book, Denethor loses his mind and tries to kill both him and his son by burning them alive. Faramir is not fully aware his dad is trying to kill him because by the time Denethor is building a funeral pyre, Faramir is slipping in and out of consciousness due to his battle wounds (to clarify, Denethor thinks his son is already dead, which is why he wants to share the funeral pyre with him. It doesn’t make it better, but it’s the facts). So the last thing Faramir hears, in full conscience, is that his dad wishes that he had died in his brother’s place and the only way he can prove his worth is sustaining victory in battle. Which he knows he cannot do. So Faramir goes to battle, is injured, and ultimately wants to die. Sound familiar? But he doesn’t. Aragorn calls him back to health in the House of Healing and he meets Eowyn. 

Faramir likes Eowyn from the moment they meet but can see she is struggling and doesn’t know the exact cause of her pain. So he talks to the best wingman in Middle Earth, Merry, and puts all the details together that Eowyn is still pretty hung up on Aragorn, and for all the wrong reasons. Faramir decides to gently pursue Eowyn which, if you think about it, is quite the courageous thing to do considering Faramir’s past. Faramir’s whole life consists of being left behind, the man that is not chosen. As we established above, his own father chose and loved his brother, Boromir, over him. Boromir was chosen to join the Fellowship of the Ring, not Faramir. It’s even in his job description to be picked over. Faramir is a Steward of Gondor, he’s to hold court until the proper king appears and then literally step out of the way. Here is another area where potentially someone is going to choose someone else in place of him. Faramir questions Eowyn about her love for Aragorn asking, “[I’m assuming] you cannot choose between us. Eowyn, do you not love me, or will you not?” Ugh, tragic. She admits, “I wished to be loved by another, but I desire no man’s pity.” Faramir clarifies, “I do not offer you my pity. For you are a lady high and valiant and you yourself won renown that shall not be forgotten; and you are a lady beautiful, I deem, beyond even the words of the Elven-tongue to tell. And I love you. Once I pitied your sorrow. But now, were you sorrowless, without fear, or any lack, were you the blissful Queen of Gondor, still I would love you. Eowyn, do you not love me?” 

It’s actually nerve-wracking when you leave out Eowyn’s response to this question; to know Faramir is asking someone he loves dearly for love in return, something he was rarely afforded in his life, especially in the beautiful way in which he asked it. He sees Eowyn for who she truly is, someone even she doesn’t fully recognize yet, and who she can be: a valiant queen. And not just any queen, Faramir says the Queen of Gondor, Aragorn’s wife. Faramir basically admits, “I know there’s a chance you could still be with Aragorn, but even if you did, I would still love you regardless.” It’s so courageous and beautiful, and in a lot of ways, the ultimate test to see if Faramir has really healed over the wounds his father has left. The wounds of being left unchosen. But Eowyn does choose, she chooses to be with him, and they ultimately provide healing and understanding to each other. 

And that’s all left unsaid in the films. None of it is really in there which is such a bummer because it’s so good. And this whole story has been waiting for me to re-discover it on my shelf for the past 13 years and I’ve finally made my way back. Can’t believe I almost missed it.

Anyhow, thank you for coming to my TED Talk on why Faramir and Eowyn are the best and why reading books is cool. 

I probably could write more, but I’ve taken a brief break in reading the dang book to write this essay and I still have a few more chapters to go to finish the whole thing. 

Good day.

[legolaslovely]

A Very Good Thing Part 2

A/N: Hello! Thanks for reading! All the parts will be on its own masterlist on the link in my bio. Hope you enjoy!

Pairing: Thorin x Reader

Word Count (this part):1,052 

Warnings (for series): fluff, some angst only in one part because I literally CAN’T DO IT

Summary (for series): (Y/N) is sick of her life in a modern city and wishes to live with the characters in her favorite book, The Hobbit. When her wish is granted, will it be all she dreamed of, or will everything fall apart? DUN DUN DUN.

You were shown to a room that was to be all your own. It was vast and beautiful, with delicate etchings in stone pillars and dark wooden beams. There was a bed in the middle of the room that was larger than any you’d ever seen. It was covered in pillows and multicolored furs. Light streaming in from the great windows told you the room was built into the face of the mountain. The view revealed the deep valley and you could just see the roofs of Esgaroth.

You walked over to the mirror that almost reached the ceiling to admire the clothing that had magically appeared on you. You peeled off the heavy coat and saw protective leather cuffs wrapped around your forearms. You were sure you wouldn’t need them tonight and set them next to your coat.

All that was left was a decorative vest that covered the tunic and your trousers, held up by another thick belt. You spun to the side and peered at yourself, squinting. “Did you make me shorter?”

You saw Gandalf grin through the mirror. He had followed you to your chambers, but remained in the doorway. “Only dwarfs live in Erebor, my dear.”

“So you shrank me?!” You weren’t angry, but amused. You laughed together and it dawned on you that you were actually talking to Gandalf the Grey, the wizard you had read about and adored so deeply. You smiled with soft eyes. “Thank you.”

He nodded. “You should rest. Realm hopping is tiring business. I will not be far away.”

He closed the door and you were left to wrap your head around your new reality. You laid on top of the bed, stretching out on the furs. After only a moment, you sat up and leapt for the door. What am I thinking trying to sleep? I’m in Erebor!

You struggled to open the tall wooden door and stuck your head out into the corridor. When you saw no one, you slipped out of your chambers and tried to decide which way to go. You saw the torches lead to multiple staircases with elegant engravings and statues. You guessed that was the way to the throne room. That was the last place you wanted to go, you hardly deserved to see that.

So you turned a corner and followed the bright light that led you to the front of the mountain. Everything was so different than you had thought it to be. Even the movies got it wrong, the kingdom wasn’t dark at all. It was stunningly gorgeous. Every corner was well lit from the massive torches and chandeliers. The light waved on the walls and showed the detailed etchings of stories, legends, and names. Handsome heads with long, braided beards were carved into the pillars. The sunlight itself was shaped by the elegant windows and doors of the corridor. You admired it all until the sun led you to where you had first seen Gandalf.

You looked out onto the valley as it was cleared. The orcs were unceremoniously tossed aside and burned while the dwarfs were gathered and brought to their resting place until the kingdom could properly mourn and say goodbye. You had never seen anything like it, the only war you had ever seen was in movies and books. The life you had led until now seemed so simple compared to this.

“One day we will look over this valley and smile. We will always remember those we lost today, but someday we will no longer mourn.”

You turned and saw a familiar face next to you. “Fili.”

“You know me?” he asked.

Your stomach turned and you hurried to pick the correct response. “Everyone in the kingdom knows you.”

He breathed out a laugh and sent a kind smile. “Sadly, I do not know you. Though I wish to, I hear I owe you my life.”

Your gaze returned to the valley and shame rose inside you.

“How did you know where I was? Where my brother was?”

“I saw you both when I was running to- I had heard Thorin- the King- and then saw you both,” you struggled.

He leaned forward to steal your attention from the valley. When you finally met him, he thanked you. “You are very loyal and true hearted to care for us so. It will not be forgotten.”

You nodded and watched the sun set behind the mountains. You did care for them. At least, you cared for the characters you knew, and weren’t they the same?

You turned to leave. “Goodnight, Fili.”

“Wait, what is your name?”

“(Y/N).”

“Goodnight, (Y/N).”

You smiled at him before you returned to your bed chambers.

You decided to stay hidden and lay low for a while. You had to get everything straight in your head before anyone else asked you any questions. Surely Gandalf could help you.

You readied yourself for bed and realized you had no pajamas with you. Consequences of realm hopping, I suppose. You set your coat, vest and cuffs on the chair next to the bed and found a comb in a drawer of the dressing table. Looking again in the mirror, you realized that besides shrinking you, Gandalf also made your hair much thicker and longer to help you blend in. You turned and admired the intricate braids that had magically appeared in your hair that morning and groaned at the thought of duplicating them. How you wished you had your phone to snap a picture.

Then, there was a knock at the door. After struggling again to open it, you saw a young dwarf holding a large, flat box out to you. “A gift from the King, my lady. He wishes you to come to the celebration in the great hall tomorrow night.”

You took the box. “Thank you.”

“Thank you, my lady. Goodnight my lady.”

You grinned. You could get used to having a title. You turned and closed the door behind you before setting the box on the bed. Inside, was a blue velvet gown with a silver waist and trimming and laid on top was a necklace of silver loops and knots. Both were clearly made by hand and both were stunning.

A party tomorrow with the King? So much for laying low.

[tearlessrain]

I’m about to watch Arthur and Merlin, which is free on youtube and came up in my suggestions randomly. I have no idea what it is but I am hungry for the arthurian Content so Imma watch it and see how it goes

update: it was way better than I expected and accidentally SUPER gay. that merlin tv show everyone loved was amateur hour compared to how gay this was.

“there is magic in the air, and in the water, but it has been forgotten by many in these lands” wow why does that sound familiar I wonder

the funny thing is I watched fellowship of the ring literally yesterday so this will be hilarious

but there is hope [extremely unsubtle cut to a baby who is definitely important]

now I think... and I could be wrong... but guys I suspect this baby might be the chosen one.

oh god there was no father he was conceived by midichlorians

THE SKYWALKERS HAVE INFILTRATED THE CELTS

okay place your bets is it arthur or merlin

it’s Merlin. or Merddyn rather, in a surprise twist this movie was written by Fucking Nerds

so far mild cheese aside this is surprisingly watchable

“your crops fail and so you ask the king for help, but do not help yourselves! where are your alters?? starvation is punishment for your lack of faith!” THE RNC HAS INFILTRATED THE CELTS

okay so near as I can figure out the mark is from the old gods but there’s a druid who I guess speaks for the king or something who wants them to worship different old gods and now he’s demanding the villagers make a human sacrifice and it’s gonna be Smol Merddyn.

aw no they killed Celtic Shmi. Merddyn got away though and is now wandering the Forbidden Forest

I’m mad this is actually a solid movie so far. absolutely nothing unexpected has happened but I didn’t click on a movie called “Arthur and Merlin” to be surprised

oh wait that kid who freed him was Arthur

fifteen years later arthur is... a military leader who looks strangely like one of those romans played by obviously white actors in older movies

I honestly can’t pinpoint when this movie was made on aesthetics alone

ooo some Roving Misogynists™ are here to cause trouble and assault random women for being christian. by order of the druid no doubt.

“you mock us!” “I do.” okay I’m starting to like this arthur.

oh my god is that. he just fucking. tripped over excalibur while wading in like a two foot deep pond to get this woman’s cross back for her. best interpretation ever.

wait Olwen??? as in Ysbaddaden’s daughter Olwen?? once again I assumed they’d go with Guinevere or make someone up but I forgot, this movie was made by Fucking Nerds.

okay I know insisting everything is gay is a constant thing on this site but I want to point out that Arthur has showed nothing but very platonic friendship to Olwen but this is the face he makes when he sees Merddyn in a vision

and I mean to be fair to him this is what Merddyn looks like now

goddamn

oh no they’ve immediately made it very clear that he’s Romantically Involved With Olwen In Secret Look They’re Kissing Nobody Is Gay

so now I really want to know who wrote this movie because what I’m seeing here is people who intentionally chose to use the name merddyn, and know that olwen exists, but then decided to pair her romantically with... king arthur. and culhwch just doesn’t exist I guess. not that this is the most off the wall welsh mythology ship I’ve encountered but still it’s a weird one for this kind of media even if it’s an indie film

who are you people. how did this movie get made. I mean I like whatever it is but for real how and why did you do this.

I love how there’s just this trio of random dudes who don’t even have names who are arthur/olwen’s friends. and yet somehow they’re likable and I’m rooting for them. whoever they are.

so the only real problem with this movie that’s denting my enjoyment is that nobody has names and they all have the same haircut so I lose track of who’s doing what. see these are arthur’s friends:

and these are bad guys:

and Olwen is the only person in either screenshot who has a name

if any of them ever changes into a new outfit I’m screwed.

I’m gonna be real with y’all I love me a cursed forest

in an ironic twist, excalibur is now firmly stuck in a tree trunk and arthur cannot get it out

why is this movie GOOD what the heck. I mean the druid and king situation is blatantly ripped from wormtongue and theoden but I still like. care about the king. they’ve done it well.

“I’ve already told you, I am no longer a man.” “are you so sure???” see I know nothing will happen since this is a movie not a fanfic but that line is the quintessential hate-makeout segue

THIS IS VERY HETEROSEXUAL they’ve had most of the argument while approximately that distance from each other

oh god what the fuck arthur’s friends got sacrificed by the druid just to make a point to olwen. this is the opposite of a Sacrificial Girlfriend.

they do not need to be this close to each other to argue but they keep on doing it

they’ve been on screen together for less than five minutes y’all

arthur: maybe you’re right, you are no longer a man

merlin: [conjures an entire patch of flowers for him to make... some kind of point I guess?]

okay now they’re arguing again but there’s all this “I thought I knew you” talk (which, again, it’s been five minutes) and the actors have clearly decided that their dynamic is based entirely on constant, roiling sexual tension

why does every single thing they say scan like dialogue from a slow burn enemies to friends to lovers fanfic

“the girl in the village, did you love her once?” “I know little of love” “Surely a man who can control the growth of a flower must be able to make love blossom” JUST FUCK ALREADY

this is how they’re having this conversation by the way

there was only one shrub hollow

“to control nature is one thing, but only the most powerful sorcerer could control the mind of a man- OR WOMAN,” he said, heterosexually.

y’all I’m gonna be honest I thought I was just projecting at first but this is the gayest thing I’ve seen since the baseball song in high school musical 2. this is just absolute beleg and turin levels of probably unintended but utterly blatant homosexuality. I’m so glad I decided to watch this movie and youtube was right to recommend it to me.

this movie really speaks to me because on a spiritual level I too am a mystical but irritable and socially stunted forest hermit with sexy hair just waiting for a brash but pure-hearted warrior who looks like a roman statue to draw me out of my cave with homoerotic banter. 

oh it’s not excalibur it’s... nuadu. which I guess in this movie is not the king of the tuatha de danann but a sword forged by them? see my first impulse would be to assume that the way they’re mangling everything, the writers knew nothing about Celtic folklore, except that they’ve chosen such weirdly specific things to mangle. they know their shit, they’ve just deliberately chosen to go absolutely buckwild with it.

THEY’RE DOING IT AGAIN THEY ARE INCAPABLE OF ARGUING WHILE STANDING MORE THAN TWO FEET APART

for real though character-wise this might be one of my favorite interpretations of merlin/merddyn I’ve ever seen. I feel like everyone involved was genuinely super passionate about the subject matter they were working with. like all jokes aside he’s really honestly well acted and well written.

STOP IT NOW YOU HORNY SIMPLETONS

uh oh they’ve been captured by... bandits?

oh it’s olwen’s uncle

“TO GOOD WOMEN... WHY DO YOU NOT DRINK, MERDDYN”

it is a mystery, olwen’s uncle.

a mystery.

this motivational monologue could have been so cheesy but like. I’m here for it. I would follow arthur into battle.

aw come on. olwen’s uncle betrayed them. I kinda saw it coming but dammit.

again, the druid should be absolutely stupid but he’s kind of a cool villain.

yay olwen’s uncle unbetrayed them. probably so would I if I’d seen what merddyn just did to the druid’s guys.

so the druid is trying to sacrifice ten thousand souls to raise a god from the underworld and merddyn is on the fucking warpath. and olwen’s uncle is ON BOARD HELL YEAH.

THE HOBBITS THE HOBBITS THE HOBBITS THE HOBBITS TO ISENGUARD TO ISENGUARD

arthur and merddyn have escalated to clutching each other’s clothes during their heated two-feet-apart discussions

olwen is a badass in her own right like she has her own whole thing going trying to save the king from basically his own literal dementia and the druid who’s taking advantage of it, which is somehow way more compelling than just magical mind control.

“I thought the cave taught you fairness” “well... you taught me fighting” JUST KISS.

okay let’s see how they pull off this dark god on the shoestring budget they definitely have, at this point I honestly believe in them.

by avoiding showing the god entirely apparently but they made it work even with that.

aw the king has named him his heir. which again we all knew would happen but it’s still so well done.

and we end on merddyn placing the crown on arthur’s head while lovingly quoting his own words back at him, while olwen looks on with the kind of approval that implies they’ve ended up with some kind of road to el dorado situation. solid.

so I was expecting this to be absolute garbage with bad actors and checked out writers just trying to make another mediocre coattail-riding medieval fantasy movie and what I got was some weirdly good actors and writers who are clearly obsessed with celtic folklore and desperately wanted to just run amok with it for an hour and 45 minutes. and they did. they poured every ounce of their hearts and souls and tiny, tiny budget into it. and it was beautiful. 10/10

[sugar-petals]

Wow! Your analyses are amazing and so well thought out - each post I read is so full of passion and care! Unfortunately, when I hit the ‘keep reading’ bar for your hogwarts sorting post, I couldn’t find the rest of it. Do you think you could share what their houses are again? I’d love to know what you think about their sorting!

Someone finally says something about the sorting I—

Jimin - Slytherin | ♦ Charming

“What will you be like in 10 years?” - “I’ll be on the world news, what else… I’ll be a man that the whole world wants.” That’s Slytherin aspiring to greatness. Like he wanted to be the #1 swordsman after watching One Piece as a kid and picked up fencing. That easily excludes cautious Hufflepuff who wants to be loved but only in their frugal sphere without bold ambitions. And Ravenclaw who’d be in analysis paralysis before they even thought of going global. Jimin lacks most aquiline traits in particular. Like he made fun of RM’s convoluted existential philosophy in AHL. Doesn’t mean he has intellectual disdain, consider how much of an ace in math/chemistry he was. But it wasn’t for curiosity. More like Jimin’s trademark goal-orientation, concealed behind this planet’s most charming smile. He hides a lot of fraternity bias, too, with a mask of Hufflepuff’s altruism. But inside, he is motivated by praise for personal gains. He goes about it in a perfectionistic way and won’t bother with Gryffindor’s cowardice issues… which points to Slytherin. Career comes first at all cost. He wants power over the audience, the applause. Not much adventure or savior complex going on. While daredevils Tae and Hobi always say after practice/filming how fun it was despite the challenge (Gryffindor heroism focus), pragmatic Jimin - just like JK and Suga - sees the shortcomings to work on (Slytherin competency focus). He wants to avoid public humiliation, see weight and voice struggles. Gryffindor would boldly say: suck it up, haters. But Jimin is different, too dark and vulnerable below the surface. He can’t handle malicious critique or being overshadowed. I was born in Busan first! Greed to dance center! Look at me only, or else I get angry. Slytherin claiming the top spot there, not afraid to threaten. He will change his manners, looks, or complete objective to achieve. No other house is that adaptable. And with his level of smooth like a snake flirting, without a doubt he has plenty of sexy cunning.

Taehyung - Gryffindor | ♦ Daring

Power or wisdom he does not crave. It’s a decision between Gryffindor and Hufflepuff, and I argue for the former. His goal when he was young and couldn’t afford things was to have a “fabulous” life, to provide for himself and everything his relatives lacked. HP translation: chivalry and fighting for the underdog. He said he admired the heroism of his dad, or the sacrifice of the protagonist in one of his favorite movies, “A Wolf’s Temptation”. V wanted to become a singer because of the positive feedback from his peers when he was on stage. Disclosing his core values, he states wanting to be confident and not giving up. That’s Gryffindor’s will, social adventure spirit, and valor. Consider the wild things he does on live television in general. He eats things he shouldn’t eat, endlessly teased his pet dog by blowing on it, nae nae’d for KBS and the entire world, danced in stilettos, and once left in the middle of broadcast to go to the toilet walking through the entire venue. For me as a Slytherin: unfathomable, and Yoongi thinks the same since Tae’s Cypher performance. You probably spotted a Gryffindor when the Slytherins are not having it. It’s boldness mixed with a lax attitude that rubs snakes the wrong way: ”Grades are not that important”. I don’t see a hard-working, decency-loving Hufflepuff. It’s the impulse of Gryffindor that will not micro-manage or conform. There are some other few moments that made me think Gryff. In Run BTS Ep.32 he did not play fair at all, first protected Jungkook, then bluffed to betray him for the fun of it. Too much hilarity for consistent and just Hufflepuff. “Rescuer house” Gryffindor is a lot less focused on loyalty even in jest. Last but not least: Last time I checked, the “V” sign stands for victory so we really have a lion here.

Yoongi - Slytherin | ♦ Goal-oriented

No doubts about this old soul. The day Agust D finished everyone, the minute Min Yoonji entered the room, the moment Suga broke down receiving the 2016 daesang, his house was set. Need more evidence? “You need people like me to point your fuxxin’ fingers and say ‘that’s the bad guy’”. Verbatim from the mixtape cover. No Ravenclaw nor Hufflepuff would EVER promote that. Gryffindor is eliminated, too. He rather cares about the power behind the throne, the respect, the skills and resources that he will keep secret if he has to. He’d even want being feared which practically no other house desires or has use for. Yoongi operates in the shadows, literally at night. Slytherin loves the dark, the common room would be so perfect for him. 200+ songs a year? That’s what I call ambition. He knew what his purpose was ever since, too. No surprise he loves trophies, it was all in his past vision. His sharp tongue, “I’m a genius” antics, and stance of observation signify Slytherin’s cunning braggadocio style. All mixed with shrewdness, as does his fixation on the past. If you go through the house traits, yeah. He does have them all. He gets along with actual living snakes just fine as well, just like Jimin. I mean, Suga is so Slytherin he could straight up hang out with Merlin himself to talk about what it means to be at the top. If he wasn’t busy producing - read: goal-orientedness and self-preservation -  he’d be a leader candidate. Suga has a lot of boss qualities and can guide things to success without disclosing everything. Confer his Festa hosting, he keeps the members on track. Most clear-cut Slytherin in Bangtan.  

Jin - Hufflepuff | ♦ Caring

Loyal, hardworking, practical, cheerful, family-oriented, traditional, anti-competition, friendly, slept on. Jin meets each criterium to a T. He always seems like he just came to chill with his favorite people. Hufflepuff is often compared to the homely Hobbit culture, I find it absolutely dead-on and reminiscent of Jin’s mentality. He once stated that he envied his father’s “well-regulated life” and complained about such an ordinary lifestyle being difficult as he grew up. If that doesn’t ring a bell. Hufflepuff does not fit into the KPop industry at all, but they are the ones who really keep it running. Huff takes out the competition from Gryffindor/Slytherin social structures. Look at EatJin (Helga Hufflepuff also introduced food enthusiasm to Hogwarts). “252,031 people are watching me eat. Great. It can’t get any more uncomfortable than this.” Not much risk-taking or fame-seeking involved there. Worldwide handsome you say, he’s really digging it and shows all that confidence? I say that’s Jin getting with the program of what others say about him and projecting it outward to get their support - Hufflepuff first and foremost wants love. Yet it’s in a tug-of-war, it wants to be heard but also politely restrains itself so when they get a chance to self-advocate, of course, they take it! It’s to feel secure and to adapt, not because he’s arrogant or not modest. And Namjoon put him in Gryffindor. The rule-breakers and fighters. You had one job. But I bet it was to be in the same house with him or to give him some credit. If someone does not get the lines they deserve it’s Hufflepuff, because unlike Slytherin or Gryffindor, they don’t push their talents forward because they value a cozy and less eventful life much more.

J-Hope - Gryffindor | ♦ Passionate  

Q: “How does it feel to be having this global success?” - JH: “Woo! It’s nice!” Gryffindor loves fame. Our Hobi did not hesitate to answer one bit there. He has a whole lot of nerve and boldness, fits perfectly into America’s very Gryffindor culture, did you notice? Don’t let the flinch game or horror clip reaction fool you. What he values is daring. The rest is just exercising what he is good at - expressing emotions, and you can be sure he amps it up for the entertainment. If there is one house who likes an uproar, it’s the lions. They’re just not into snakes, that’s all. Also, Gryff heroism - “I was so afraid, but I survived!” style. At the beginning, he was confident since he wanted to test himself. And then it backfired. Like on Corden he exclaimed “Wow!” and danced toward the glass when it was his turn, then got caught by surprise. Classic: Gryff’s volition overriding all planning or foresight. It lacks Slytherin’s or Ravenclaw’s consideration and cautious Hufflepuff’s comfort mentality. He always goes straight ahead to combat boredom for everybody while the other members would be too embarrassed or slow. His room apparently is the noisiest. Is it a Gryffindor trait that they are very loud? I do think so. Partly because it ties to their traits of being people-oriented, temperamental, and talkative, which definitely applies to Hobi. It’s a good point to attach similar Hufflepuff values to him. But he still has that one edge of chivalry and glee in winning that makes him a lion, while he is neither very grounded nor unafraid of toil. In fact, he’s not into the sturdy badgers’ extra hard work, Slytherin’s ruthless pursuit, or Ravenclaw’s intellectual experiments and projects. Guess why Suga (S) and Joon ® have their mixtapes out while he doesn’t. J-Hope excels more using a whim and scattered energy to charge into the situation at hand.

Namjoon - Ravenclaw | ♦ Intelligent

So he sorted himself into Gryffindor. Technically, you can’t say anything against that. You go where you want to go since it shows what traits you like the most. But in his case, come on. He has no Gryffindor qualities nor do his choices in life effectively show Gryffindor values. There is a reason why he always envies Suga’s trivia knowledge. Why he’s the only one in BTS who likes to spend time in the bookstore. Why he had his “Problematic Men” show. Why Namjoon raises the LGBT+ flag so high. Why his rap and puns show great wit and second thought. Why he goes on a galaxy-level tangent any time a deep topic comes up. Why ignorance is vitriol to him. He values Ravenclaw traits. Not that his high IQ would place him there, but rather how he expresses it. All for knowledge’s sake. He prefers to be in his intellectual sphere like a scholar which clearly distinguishes him from Gryffindor and Hufflepuff. He’s formal, well-conceived, caught off guard when confronted with his fame. What’s quite interesting is that he represents the humanitarian slant of his house, Ravenclaw isn’t all books and no heart, “callous” as its main flaw is described. It’s about acceptance and conscientiousness for Namjoon. He’s an iconoclastic, wise romantic who loves to learn, and sophisticated as this house suggests. It shows whenever he writes letters for SNS. Yeah I’m all for going into the house you want to be the most - RM wants to be a Gryffindor - but if he has not one reckless bone in him and effectively does not choose courage by all means, it’s Ravenclaw which reflects him perfectly.

Jungkook - Slytherin | ♦ Self-Preserving

Typical Slytherin introvert. Shy, but determined. That sets him apart from Gryffindor in particular. If he had to choose between asking IU for her number or impressing her with his skills indirectly, he chooses the latter. Gryffindor wouldn’t even think about that and dive in head first even if the odds of rejection are high. Slytherin estimates their chances instead, looks for the best way to use their resources successfully. He’s tactical, economical, but doesn’t want to accumulate knowledge like Ravenclaws who can be equally calculating. Look at his shrugged-off responses to math questions on air. The only book he’ll ever pick up is a comic or manga. Given how much self-preservation he demonstrated so far, how much he emphasizes ambition, Slytherin is a no-brainer. Social house Hufflepuff would reach out to bond, meanwhile, Jungkook: showered alone in the early days, stays in his room, goes to Hongdae by himself, few tweets, mutes the group chat… On the other hand: Piano Tiles, wrestling, bowling, working out: JK comes out of his shell and gives it his all when he knows his efforts will be valued. He’s hypercompetitive even with small things, was not above shoving J-Hope aside mid-air to claim his title as #TheBunny in Run BTS Ep.33. If he’s forcibly pigeonholed as the baby maknae, then he’ll make it a freaking success. Delegate Slytherin an assignment that they are sure of tackling and they get active. Without a goal, what’s the use? Finally, there’s a pretty salient reason behind why he loves G-Dragon and was inspired by him to become a star in the first place. GD is the King of serpents. Slytherin family allegiance and aristocracy much? It also ties to how he treats his parents, this guy is on another level.

“♦” indicates a core quality for that specific house. 

I wrote this ages ago oh my 😂Updated the link. 

[morgana-greenleaf]

Tower of Tomorrow - Chapter 2

Tower of Tomorrow Masterlist

One year after TWS, Sam and Steve finally track Bucky down and bring him back to Avengers Tower.

Of course, there's still lots of HYDRA bases to be taken down, and Bucky finds himself actually enjoying the Avengers' company, and making friends.

Fury cleared Bucky to access the rest of the tower late the next morning, and the moment he stepped out of the lift he was accosted by Tony, holding a tablet that was projecting a hologram.

“So, I was thinking, since you’re stuck in the tower for a while, you’d need your own floor. There’s an empty one sandwiched in between Steve and Clint that should be fine. And it’s already got the basics – bedroom, bathroom, living room, plus a kitchen and laundry, although JARVIS can order you takeaway if you like, or you can use communal kitchen, that’s what most of us do, but it’s there if you like. And there’s a chute you can put your laundry and it’ll be back clean and dry within twenty-four hours, although you can do it yourself if you like. But that’s not what I’m here about, I need to know if you’d like anything special put in. Bruce wanted it extra-reinforced to survive the Hulk, and Natasha wanted it super-duper secure for all her secret spy stuff. And Clint has his set up so JARVIS can still send him warnings and whatnot if he hasn’t got his aids in. And for a dog.”

“I-I don’t need anything. You don’t have to-” Bucky began.

“Damn right I don’t have to. But I’m gonna. I need a new project to work on, and redesigning your floor might keep me amused for a few hours.”

Bucky hesitated. Did he really deserve his own floor? “Yeah, okay. But you don’t have to do anything special.”

“You must have something you like doing. Something to amuse you all day instead of moping around the tower like Steve’s been doing,” Tony protested, poking the hologram. “Look, there’s a huge empty spot here. We’ve gotta put something there.”

“A library? Maybe?” Bucky had always loved reading, although his family hadn’t been able to afford many. He must’ve reread The Hobbit dozens of times.

Tony smacked a hand into his forehead. “I’m so stupid! I didn’t build a library level! JARVIS, cancel my plans. We’ve got a library to design. Why didn’t I think of this before?”

“Because the reading you do is usually on an ebook?” JARVIS suggested.

“That-that’s not the point, JARVIS,” Tony huffed, fingers already flying across the screen.

“If it’s too much trouble, I can just use an ebook thing?” Bucky offered, but Tony dismissed him with a wave of his hand.

“No, this is fun. Plus, physical books are better. Just stay out of your level until dinner while I get the builders in.”

“What am I supposed to do until then?”

“Ummm.” Tony looked stumped. “I dunno. Explore. Go online shopping. Just don’t kill anyone.”

“Online shopping?” What the hell was that?

“Just ask JARVIS to order anything you like in. Clothes, shoes, books, knives, whatever you like.”

“I don’t have any money.” And speaking of which, was he supposed to pay rent? Because he’d rather just squat in abandoned buildings.

Tony looked shocked. “You’re on my money now. And I have a lot, so there’s no need to worry.”

“Okay, thanks.” Bucky turned away, but Tony caught his wrist.

“One more thing, JARVIS, scan him.”

A blue light ran up and down his body, and then JARVIS announced, “All done, sir.”

“What was that?” Bucky demanded.

“Most of the tower uses fingerprint ID or retinal scans. JARVIS is giving you access,” Tony explained, shoving past and into the lift.

Bucky wandered over to the kitchen benchtop, and glanced around to make sure there was no one else there. It was clear. He looked up at the ceiling.

“Building? JARVIS?” he asked, sceptical.

“Yes, Sergeant Barnes?” JARVIS responded.

“Can I eat this? The food here? Or do I need to buy my own?” he asked.

“All the food for here is in the communal area, and therefore, in theory, for anyone. However, I might advise against eating prepared food that someone might have saved for later, or Ms Romanov’s chocolates.” JARVIS informed him.

“Thanks.” He opened the fridge, and found a large tub of yoghurt. That would do. Even a year on from HYDRA, he still preferred to eat softer foods, closer to the consistency of the gloop they’d fed him. He filled a bowl, and then added in some berries from the fruit tray. He settled on the lounge nearby, and switched on the television.

It showed a report on the HYDRA base he’d destroyed just yesterday. “-believed to be the work of a vigilante group comprising of at least a dozen members,” some politician was saying at a press conference. “While their efforts are appreciated, we must reiterate that it is not their responsibility, but rather the job of the Army and Special Forces. We ask them to stand down. Anyone with information on the location of HYDRA bases should call the hotline 1300 655 506, where it will be dealt with by the appropriate authorities.”

The number flashed on the screen, and then changed back to the studio. “And just in, the notorious Winter Soldier has been detained in relation to the events last year in DC, as well as two dozen assassinations and several more suspected assassinations. Thought for many years to be just a ghost story-”

The screen switched off. Clint chucked the remote onto the ottoman and dropped down beside Bucky. “Don’t look at that. It won’t help.”

“Who told them?” Bucky growled.

“None of us. Things get leaked. It happens. Trust me. My home address got leaked, and I could barely get out the door the next day there was so many people. But Tony’ll get his press people onto it. They’ll sort it out.”

“That’s what Steve said about the lawyers. Sounds like Tony doesn’t do much, he just pays people to sort everything out for him.”

Clint snorted. “Guess that’s an advantage of being so rich no one can actually put a value on you. But seriously, they’ll sort it out. You might have to give a few statements, do some interviews, talk about what happened, which sucks, but then you’ll be fine.”

“I can deal with that,” Bucky said, “What I can’t deal with is sitting here all day with nothing to do.”

“Want to come to the range with me?” Clint offered.

“Am I allowed?” Fury had said he could go anywhere in the tower, but surely thing wouldn’t allow him to shoot things.

“Course you are. And anyway, the guns only have blanks on the range. Although I use real arrows.”

“And I can use a bow. How do you know I won’t shoot you with one?”

“I don’t,” Clint grinned, and lead the way to the range.

Bucky had a surprisingly good time at the range. He spent half an hour destroying the bullseyes of the four targets in his lane before Clint showed him how to on the fight simulator. The two of them spent hours fighting off wave after wave of holographic projections shooting holographic projectiles at them. As time progressed, and the simulator got harder, the walls started shooting jets of water at them, trying to knock them off their feet, or tipping piles of foam bricks on their heads (to simulate falling buildings), and then the wind machines turned on at full power. Bucky was just gland both he and Clint had had the presence of mind to fit as much ammo as was physically possible on their person.

Then the floor started shaking. Apparently Tony had found a way to simulate earthquakes. The man was a genius. And completely mad. Foam balls started rolling along the floor at them. A blue blip hit Clint in the head, and it took Bucky a few moments to realise that the simulator had ended. They stood there, in a room empty except for water and foam blocks and balls, with arrows and the blank bullets littered around. They were both drenched.

“Hey, you’re pretty good,” Clint said, clapping Bucky on the shoulder. “We should do this more often.”

“You’re not bad yourself, Hawkeye,” Bucky said. “JARVIS, what’s the time?”

“It is currently three forty-nine, Sergeant Barnes.”

“I’ve got to go and see the doctor for some assessments. Thanks for…this,” Bucky said, turning to leave.

“You’ll come to dinner though, right? 6 o’clockish, the kitchen. Everyone’ll be there. And we’ll probably have a movie night, after.” Clint began picking up his arrows.

“Sure,” said Bucky, and headed back out.

He managed to sneak into Steve’s floor and have a quick shower (once JARVIS informed him Steve was in the gym) while he dried his clothes in the drier.

It was one minute to four when Bucky stepped into the lift, and the clock flickered over to four o’clock as he stepped out of the lift into Bruce Banner’s lab. He swept his gaze over the lab, cataloguing everything in sight, every piece of equipment that might be used on him.

“Hi, Bucky,” Bruce said, setting his glasses down on desk.

“Hi,” he gritted out. This was a bad idea. The doctor would run tests on him. Experiment on him. Use him as a labrat. He tried to back away, but his back hit the wall, blocking his escape.

Bruce followed the movement. “Nothing that I’m going to do will hurt you, or alter your body in any way. I’m not a HYDRA doctor. I won’t do any of this without your permission, although I strongly advise you to do this.

“All we’re doing today is some scans, mainly focused on your brain and arm. For your brain, we would like to compare your current scans to the ones in the files from HYDRA, to see how the healing is going. The other thing we would like to look at is your arm, and how it is attached to your body. Tony will probably want to have a look at it at some point, if you’re willing.”

“The files said how it was attached,” Bucky mumbled.

“The files showed several versions, which I assume means different arms?” Bruce asked, and with a nod from Bucky, continued. “It also showed that a lot of your bones have been either replaced or reinforced with metal to support the weight. It’s anchored quite deep into your chest, I believe.”

“Why do you need to scan, then?” Bucky asked, dreading the answer.

“We don’t think that it’s particularly good for you, with the way it’s done. If it’s left the way it is, there might be permanent and serious damage to your spine and back.”

“I managed for seventy years.”

“Yes, and did a lot of damage.”

“Okay, fine. I’ll do the scans,” Bucky said. Better get it over and done with.

Bruce led him over to a gurney. “If you’d like to hop on here, I’ll put you in the machine. It’ll take at least an hour and a half to fully scan you, so feel free to sleep or something.”

Bucky took a deep breath, and climbed onto the gurney. He squeezed his eyes shut as Bruce wheeled him into the scanner and turned it on. It was cylindrical, just like his cryofreeze chamber. It made whirring noises, just like the cryofreeze chamber just before it froze him. He dug the fingernails of his right hand into his palm, and tried to focus on that instead. He couldn’t sleep like Bruce suggested, because who knew when he’d wake up? But he could survive an hour and a half in there, if it helped Fury clear him. He’d survived worse.

Ten minutes by his count into the scan, Bruce settled into a chair. “How about I put some music on?”

“Sure,” Bucky said. It came out barely audible, and weirdly high pitched.

There was a moment of silence, and then music began to play. “This is the Beatles,” Bruce said, “Rubber Soul.”

“Okay.” Bucky settled back and focused on the music.

The ninety minutes passed in a blur. The scanner switched off just as Help! finished, and Bruce pulled him out.

“Would you like to stay and see the scans?” Bruce asked.

“Yes, please.” This was a luxury never afforded to him by HYDRA doctors.

Bruce pulled the scans up on a holoscreen, and then pulled up the HYDRA scans next to it.

“This is the most recent scan, from July 2011. There’s minimal difference between that and the scan from 2004, so if we assume that nothing major happened between 2011 and 2014, we then compare it to your scan you just did.” Bruce pointed to an area on the brain. “This is your hippocampus, where memories are stored. If you look at the two scans, you can see it looks a lot better than it did in 2011. So we can assume that your brain has been healing very quickly. I’m guessing you’ve got a lot of your memories back?”

“Yeah. I think I remember pretty much everything, expect for what a normal human forgets. But I remember my family, and growing up and moving out, going off to fight. And fighting in the war, and getting captured. I remember all the experimentation and torture…from Azzano and from later.”

“Do you remember when everything was? The order of memories? Or are they just…there?” Bruce asked.

“I think most of the order of the memories I’ve worked out is from books than my memories. But every day, they make more sense,” Bucky said.

“That’s a good sign, Bucky. I’ll let Fury know, send him these and explain them. Is that okay?”

“Yeah. What choice do I have?”

Bruce looked guilty. “I wish it were otherwise.”

For some reason, Bucky believed him.

He left the lab feeling considerably better than when he’d entered, and took the lift up to the kitchen, where Clint, Natasha, Tony, Steve and Sam were loading platters of food.

“Help yourself,” Clint said, shoving a plate at him. Bucky grabbed it reflexively, then followed Clint over to the benchtop.

Clint filled his plate with pizza, which Bucky ignored in favour of the spaghetti bolognaise.

“Who makes this?” he asked, sitting down between Clint and Sam.

“Whoever feels like cooking, and then we just order takeaway for the rest,” Clint said around a mouthful of pizza.

“The spag bol’s mine, by the way,” Sam said.

“It’s very good,” Bucky said honestly.

“Oi! Terminator!” Tony yelled.

“What is it,” he said. One conversation with Tony had proved exhausting.  He wasn’t sure he could cope with another.

“So, it’s movie night tonight. Have you seen Star Wars?”

“No, I’ve been a little busy.”

Tony gasped dramatically. “Okay, we’re watching A New Hope tonight.”

“A New Hope? We have to watch The Phantom Menace first,” Sam said.

“A New Hope came out first,” Tony said, “Therefore you watch it first.”

“The Phantom Menace is first chronologically. It makes sense to watch them in the order they happen,” Sam argued.

“All in favour of original trilogy before prequels?” Tony asked. He raised his hand, followed by Clint, and after a moment’s hesitation, Natasha. “Sorry Sam, you’re outvoted.”

“You didn’t ask Bruce,” Sam said, petulantly.

“JARVIS, please ask Bruce his opinion on the order to watch the Star Wars films,” Tony said.

“Don’t you think you’re taking this a bit seriously?” Bucky asked.

Tony looked scandalised. “No! This is an important part of your cultural education.”

“Excuse me sir, Dr Banner believes A New Hope should be watched first,” JARVIS interrupted.

“Argument settled. A New Hope it is,” Tony announced smugly.

Sam huffed, and looked away.

After they’d all finished eating, and worked together to wash up and clean the kitchen (which Tony managed to get out of by setting up the movie and making popcorn), they sat on the lounge (except for Clint, who sat on a purple beanbag, with a massive labradoodle lying on top off him, trying to steal his popcorn) and watched A New Hope. And when that ended, Tony put on The Empire Strikes Back straight away and no one argued, so they watched that, and then they decided they may as well finish the trilogy, so they watched Return of the Jedi as well.

By the time Bucky trudged out of the lift and into his new home, it was past midnight, so he didn’t get the chance to explore, instead just lay down on his bed without even undressing, and fell asleep.

All things considered, it was a good day. No one had tried to electrocute him, the doctor actually seemed okay, and the Avengers hadn’t treated him weirdly, and actually seemed to accept him, although he wasn’t convinced that would last. It was probably because he hadn’t spent that long with them yet.

Still, maybe tomorrow would be a good day too.