#like don't fucking touch him. you can't
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i have so many thoughts about his gender and how he's kind of textually a woman and/or abinary (read tags if interested)
#i dont stand for cis rust cohle. that's not real. come on...#like... super dissociated from his body and his desires. and he has to keep a tenuous hold on his identity via various forms of self control#('contemplating the idea of allowing his own crucifixion'#being sexless#being able to compartmentalize his identity to fit a need)#says himself that relationships between men and women don't work and are only fit to procreate#says his daughter's death spared him from the sin of being a father#the act of being a man or being a woman are two extremes that are too harshly defined for him#edges drawn too sharply and not allowing for any flexibility which he needs#to be a man is to be the executioner and to be a woman is to be predestined to be the martyr that is what he believes#these are choices too difficult for him to make so he leaves them unmade vague up in the air for other people to stare sneer and interrogate#and it's worse yet when his body is equal parts weapon and a stress relief mechanism to others#gets his bodily autonomy stripped so often it's second nature to him. uses barbiturates like a 50's housewife#he cleans up real fuckin' prettyâ hisself and the messes he's roughly shoved into#he's tired of talking to other people like a human beingâ he speaks another language entirely. one more visceral and raw#one that says the truth and nothing but.#if i think about the scene in episode six with maggie and what it meansâ#if the two of them are women#or if one of them is something that isn't exactly a manâ#i think i will lose it#rust's looser swagger (or lack thereof) in contrast to marty's prevalent machismo btw... fascinating#his kind of deer-like charm. he Looks vulnerable only he's protected by an impermeable barrier#like don't fucking touch him. you can't#rambled so MUCH. sorry. but if you understand you understand#rust cohle#true detective#disasterpiece.png
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the to the point of distraction au is incredible and i have so many thoughts,,, is tatooine working on taking down any of the other hutt systems, and are maybe trying to like, seduce the jedi and the sith back to see who will help their anti-slavery quest??? is kitster like, making fun of anakin in the evenings while they watch their coruscanti day time holos together? is obi-wan gonna be the jealous one this time?
oooohoho good thoughts!! to address in order,
i think any new kingdom of tatooine is going to have to eventually take down the other hutt systems, but also they'll need to strengthen themselves first - which is probably why shmi is entertaining both the jedi and the sith right now for sure. if neither faction feels good to her, she'd be fine going alone, it'd just be quicker to allow one to help her.
kitster and anakin definitely get together at night and kitster drags anakin for filth over all the shit he's said or done with darth solence because it's genuinely hilarious. kitster's never really seen anakin like this with anyone. half the time he's mooning over solence and the other half he's trying to stab him with a knife. kitster was half afraid anakin would stab him with a knife during a banquet where darth solence had, apparently, remembered his mission and was showering kitster-who-is-pretending-to-be-prince-skywalker in attention and flirty asides
which brings me to the last point where honestly i think my understanding of anakin's character in general is that he's jealous. or greedy. or possessive, which is why it shows up in my works so much. i think he's irrationally jealous a lot which then sneaks into his narrative when i write things from his perspective. im sure people are sick and tired of this facet of my anakins, but honestly it's one of the things that, for me, make his character read as a version of anakin skywalker, despite the crazy situations i put him in. sorry!
at the same time i really don't see obi-wan kenobi's character having that same nugget of irrational jealousy or greed or possessiveness that i see anakin skywalker having and that's why a lot of my fics have elements of jealous anakin but not jealous obi-wan - jealous/possessive obi-wan is more au dependent than essential to the character for me
that all being said, for this au i do think obi-wan would be jealous or possessive - after all, he's Fallen! He's dark! he can allow his jealousy to run rampant! now...how many situations crop up where he can really be jealous or possessive? like it's not kitster the manservant that anyone's trying to seduce, it's the prince! obi-wan's kitster isn't in the line of fire, so to speak, so while i'm sure there are moments where obi-wan feels that sweet sweet green-eyed monster, the plotty identity shenanigans really thwart more openly jealous obi-wan here
#asks#to the point of distraction au#NOT that i want to say anakin's irrational jealousy is always a bad trait#or inherently Dark or evil or something#i see it as like on a sliding scale#where sometimes its at the end thats 'i don't wanna share my toy with someone :( '#and then other fics it's at the 'i will choke my pregnant wife because she is clearly fucking my master'#not to like. bring canon into it or whatever#but like take my last fic a more perfect union#where BOTH anakin and obi-wan are jealous#obi-wan's jealousy is like. eruptive for that chapter where he has to see padme and anakin together#but mostly it's simmering and or overcome by his heartache/guilt#anakin's jealousy of obi-wan's time and attention is rampant#but it's not evil or dark#it's just codependent#and irrational#more on that 'i'm NOT sharing MY toy' end of the scale rather the 'oh you touched him? ok i will take your hands so that can't happen again
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oh! oh </3 oh!! okay!
#he KNEW that apologizing in the nest was futile but when he thought riko was back he STILL APOLOGIZED#HE DIDNT EVEN KNOW WHO WAS TOUCHING HIM BUT HE WAS ALREADY APOLOGIZING#his genuine confusion makes me SO SAD#heâs been through so much but he's still like. so...innocent#his ânormalâ is so fucked up. he canât even fathom how wrong the things that happened to him were#he knows firsthand that apologizing does nothing to break his fall and he's like... âis this a trick?â#like âwhat do you mean youâre not going to beat the shit out of me after i accidentally hit laila in a triggered state?â#âwhat do you mean there are ways to solve problems without violence?â#and him saying âi can't promise it wonât happen againâ (lashing out when triggered)#as in: when it happens again i am expecting to be punished#as in: i will apologize if that's what you want. if that means you won't hit me. if it pleases you.#as in: but when it happens again-do what you must. i will deserve it.#heâs been hurt so often so badly that protecting himself is second nature#he has never been around safe people#his first instinct is fight or flight#his body is protecting him before his brain can catch up#and he obviously does not want to hurt them#but its so fucking HEARTBREAKING because he KNOWS he won't be able to control it when fight or flight kicks in#and if they are going to be around him it is inevitable he will resort to violence. it is all he knows.#but he still cares enough to prepare them for that reality#like. âi can't promise i won't hurt you againâ and âi don't mean toâ and âpunish me as you see fitâ#he's giving them permission to HURT HIM for protecting himself#tsc spoilers#tsc#the sunshine court#all for the game#aftg#jean moreau#the foxhole court#tfc
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get it Kim has a lot to unpack do you get it
it's imperfect I'll never polish it just take it as it is I should have put aerostatics not airplanes...
#I don't know how the hell to draw kim#PLEASE gib me feedback#pretend the dialogue is better this is all I can do lol. but you get the gist of it#aaa give me constructive criticism. the other post about kim secretly being a loser made me think about what his apartment would look like#and this popped in my head I had to draw it#is this in character?#there's no eyebrow battle because in my head this happens some time in the future where kim opens up a little more easily#at this point he trust him with his secrets more (but not completely. harry's not touching the blue box today)#but it's a mixture of ''maybe if I tell x he will stop asking for more'' and real trust#but like do you see that happen#it's a secret because he doesn't want other people to learn that insisting can work#like I said in the tags of the other post I think he never lets anyone in to the point of avoiding calling the plumber even if the sink#has been broken for months#addition: fuck I should have putted more machines in there. I couldn't think of anything else other than radio controlled airplane#and a sewing machine. he must have more stuff like the camera.#he'd have some dangerous thing to warm the room#and nerd stuff. I'm not sure if he'd display it or keep it boxed somewhere#disco elysium#that's a convertible couch-bed if you can't tell. half covered with the Pile#pointless microblogging#it's so hard to draw them right they look different in every official thing#believe me I have tried#idk how to put more of the skills here :/#I have achieved peak kimharry brainrot I can't go back
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hey has anyone ever considered doing shinjiro smut for after the fade to black but he lays you across his lap, like has anyone ever considered the canon praise kink with him moreâshinjiro who scolds you, calls you trouble and tells you to stay close to him like a "good girl", shinjiro who acts tough, pretends to be fed up with you pushing him around (he loves it, but that doesn't mean you're not gonna hear about it), ignoring what he wants, so two can play that game, and you think, god, he's not holding back anymore, he's going to kiss me, finally, we're going toâ but no, he settles on his bed and pats his lap and tells you that you need to "take responsibility" for teasing him like that, messing with his feelings â "be a good girl." remember, you started this.
#shinjiro aragaki#suggestive#i also like the idea of asking him to do something and he outright scoffs like fully has an attitude about it#tries to remind you what he said about ignoring his needs and asks you what makes you think he's gonna pay attention to yours#you think you get to ask him anything? that's cute#i love playing into that though like i know everyone is all in on the 'i ain't holding back anymore bit' but sorry#man says 'you think you can just push me around? ignore what i want? yeah. well. two can play that game' in that VOICE too? whew boy#like i think he should get to do that a little bit i think he should put me over his lap until i behave#fuck i think it should be more than that though like imagine him lifting you and just. like. tossing you onto the bed.#trying to sass him about the noise and he's like 'you think i give a shit about those guys when i got you right here?' like#i want him to take the wind out of me ya feel i want to talk shit get bit#hit a little too but like open handed#or maybe he tosses you on the bed and you're like 'oh shit oh shit' and then he sits at the foot of it and fucking#PULLS you onto his lap and rucks up your skirt just like that and there are a few moments - a hitched breath#'under negotiated kink' i don't CAREEE that's part of the fantasy like how hot would it be to just have someone tick those boxes untold#either way whether he gets wild or not (preferably yes but maybe needs time to warm up)#it's like. god. he should get to y'know. like (some of) my autonomy being taken from me without him ever overstepping is hot. hot. hot.#he should bend me over his lap and make me keep count while he very tenderly very lovingly mocks me#condescending about the great leader letting herself be treated like this and enjoying it literally makes you turn around#and finally finally touches you properly but he fucking laughs and you're red-faced and he goes 'isn't that embarrassing' and ramps up#so you can't even answer him#god should i try to write this#i think i'm too much of a perfectionist to do this sometimes because i'll stew and never get it done ugh#anyway.#filth#pure filth#thank you#i think we outdid that suggestive tag#smut#(for safety)
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Ugh I was excited for today until I found out I'd have to spend it with people that actively make me hate being alive hate the future and drain me off all energy physically mentally spiritually like a vampire I can't stand to be around her she is the definition of stupidity and even then that's generous as fuck this bitch has filled her brain with so much garbage I watch her brain cells die at alarming rates every single time she uses her vocal cords her giggles make me want to jam a sewing needle into my ear repeatedly so I can never have to hear it again its a friendly reminder that my parents decisions this time my dad's constantly makes me want to die
#i cant even shes just so dangerously stupid#she thinks energy drinks with natural caffeine are safe to give people who have been told by doctor doing take caffeine with thia meds#ahe thinks of a child is CHOCKING to lie them face down n rub their back#she has the evangelical woman voice worse then women I've met n that cult ahe giggles constantly and behaves like the stereotype lil german#boy just got a lollipop over.... everyone and everything whe acts likw an 11 year old I just got the first boyfriend and all they could talk#is how perfect their boyfriend is and they're so pretty good for that I pulled a boyfriend is and it's like a God thing that they met how#SOOOOOOOOOO in love while constantly nonstop touching ahe has to be touching him her hand on his thigh her atm linked with his her heaf on#his chest she has to be in her lap they make out all over the place IT'S DISGUSTING AND EMBARRASSING STOP SWAPPING SPIT#she started a i. hwr words 'love diary of their love journey' they hadn't been dateing 2 months her kids are spoiled fake Instagram bitches#with such shitty views on politics SHE'S A TRUMP FAN GIRL SHENLOVES TRUMP MY DAD BROUGHT IN A TRUMPIE#there's so much i cant even say because even admitting it on tumblr is too embarrassing i wanted.to.likw her i liked her the first day but#THE MORE I GET TO KNOW GET THE MORE N MORE N MISS RED FKAGS#she threw away all my siblings clothes school books toys uniforms for sports their in toys i bought them that week make up jewelry#in the disguise of helping clean house#while i was at the hospital the kids call me in tears i call her beg her to wait and nope.ahe didn't i found the bags by the curb i brought#my dad sided with hwr because 'she didn't mean any harm she didn't know sje was throwing them away'#my mom hasn't bsen dead a year he started dating right after ahe died#hes talking about marrying this woman this woman who has never had an honest educated thought once in her life#WHO ASLO SPEMDA MONEY LIKE A DRUNKEN SAILOR AHE CAME FROM A WITCH FAMILY HER LAST TWO HUSBANDA WERE TOUCH SHE HAS NO KNOWLEDGE OF THE COMMON#SHE SPENDS LIKE SHE STILL HAS MONEY WHEN SHE DOSE NOT AND IT'S LIKE YOU DID NOT JUST SPEND OVER 180 DOLLARS N PASTRIES GOD#SHES SO FUCKIN STUPID AND EVERY HOLIDAY SINCE MY MOM DIED WVERY FAMILY GWT TOGETHER BECAUSE WE DON'T TALK OR.DO ANYTHING WITH MOM'S SIDE#OF THE FAMILY ANYMORE SHE'S THERE EVERY WINGLE MOTHER FUCKIN WEEKEND SHES HERE I'M EXHAUSTED SHES PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY DRAINING TO BE ARO#OUND SHES LIKE IF SOMEONE TOOK A GOLDEN RETRIEVER ON A DIET OF JUST FUCKIN COCAINE LITTLE GERMAN BOY WITH LOLLY AND CRUELLA DEVILLE AND FUSE#THEN TOOK A STRAW AND DRANK ALL THE SMARTS OUT OF THAT BEING#UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGH MY DADS GOIN TO NARRY RHIA BITCH SHES GOIN TO TRY TO BE A MOTHER TO ME AND MY SIBLINGS AND THEY'RE GOIN TO#be so fucked up because her kids are not ok SHE FUCKED THEM OVER BAD SHE HAS FOUR KIDS ALL ADULTS THEY'RE JUST WOW#I HATE MY LIFE I HATE WHAY FUTURE MY FAMILY IS GOIN TO BE THE GOOD THINGS IS I WON'T HAVE TO STAY I CAN GO N MAKE A NEW ONE WITH MY WIFE#FOR ME BUT MY SIBLINGS ARE FUCKED AND ANYTIME I WANT TO VISIT MY FAMILY YANDERE GOLDEN RETRIEVER BITCH WILL BE THERE WORMING HWR WAY IN#SHES CONSTANTLY CALLING N TEXTING MY DAD NONSTOP OF SHE'S NOT NEXT TO HIM AND IF HE CAN'T RESPOND INSTANT SHE FREAKS OUT N BUGS ME
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When someone tells you they don't like hugs, that's not an invitation for you to "cure them". It is not a "you" thing, although sometimes it might be. You thinking "they have to get used to it" because "your hugs are different" and "that's how you show love" is not a valid argument. Hugging them out of the blue as a goodbye is not cool either. Fuck off.
#ok to rb in case someone is in the same boat but thinks the post is too personal#this friend of mine...#pretends he's great but can't respect one basic thing#he's lucky I have grown to control my emotions and not lash out#i hate it#don't hug me or touch me end of line#i am honest to god feeling sick#this dude and I have history where I borderline felt incapable of saying no and had sex with him#afterwards I told him how I felt#yet he still pulls this shit#hugs make me sick to my stomach I don't even hug my family#and I really don't wanna hug a man who pretty much made me hate sex (for myself) as a whole#i feel disgusting rn#twice he hugged me and got mad when I refused to hug him again#even after I already told him I hated it#then asks if I'm scared of him because of that like you piece of shit I wanna rip my skin out where you touched it#I may pretend to everyone that I'm a strong confident man but good lord#sometimes I wish I had an over protective boyfriend so he could kick him in the teeth over this shit#it's ridiculous I know but fuck#apologies if you read all these tags but I over drank after this and none of my friends are awake and I needed to vent#garrett.text
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they lied. im not going to college to get more knowledge. im going to college on jupiter to get more stupider.
#good nice drawings go in the spiral sketchbook bad evil drawings go in the UNIVERSITATEA DE VEST DIN TIMIČOARA college fair free notebook#sigh once again the shitty doodles of last week compiled for your viewing pleasure#i need to be able to sit down with tablet and do something for serious.#delete later#it's 1:30 am now i still can't sleep. i need to. do something that employs a form of mass destruction#it's beyond sick and twisted and ill how soft blonde hair is it's genuinely immoral you know like wrong and unright it's nonsensical#i don't hang with blonde people usually i am very rarely in a position where i am reminded of this. i touched blonde hair maybe 4 times in#my life at most. pushing his sunglasses up and having a few strands brush my fingers i was overcome with a kind of. tenderness. i have to#kill him.#IT'S 2 I CANT FUCKING SLEEP
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Sometimes I see Supergirl gifs of Lena and Lex and I get kind of... disappointed that they made that relationship so horrible?
Sure, Lex and Lena's relationship in comics is not the best. Their currently story is that he left her to live with her aunt and never spoke to her again after not being able to help her when she got sick. Then when he did he tried to hide her from the world of fear of not being able to protect her. She grew resentful of him after that and tried to kill him (which was so valid of her actually).
But it sucks to see that Lena so alone because besides all that, Lex loves Lena, she was once referenced as the only person Lex was truly capable of loving, and it sucks that they didn't let her have that.
Like, sure, he deserved to get shot for crying his ableist tears everytime he said he couldn't stand to see her in a wheelchair because he failed or wtv. But at very least he does lover her in his Lex Luthor way.
(then there's also the fact she's not disabled in that series, and as far as i know she also doesn't have her telephatic powers either so i wonder who that Lena was ever supposed to be lmao)
#oh so your greatest shame is your failure to make your sister walk again??#have you tried throwing yourself off a cliff?#not opening your mouth ever again may also be helpful#i hate that it's actually in character for him to feel ashamed for not being able to cure her but really???#hiding her from the world bc you can't stand to see her in a wheelchair??#again#have you ever tried throwing yourself off a cliff#lex luthor#lena luthor#dc comics#im rating bc i love them actually#he loves her so fucking much i just wish this wasn't the storyline they decided to go with#she could've at least have some incurable comic illness or wtv#but alas#still better than him having that awful beard and being so fucking weird around her for no reason like that series seem to have done#again i have never touched it and i don't think i ever will but still
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almost 4am can't stop thinking about the meaning of the idiom 'to have blood on [someone's] hands'âto be responsible for a person's deathâcombined with the fact that Zach is the one we are specifically shown with Daryl's actual blood on his hands (once for real and once in a dream)... Not Josh who had been holding the sword Daryl fell onto, but Zach who took the sword out.
#super dark times#+ part of it that's insane to me is: Josh COULD have easily ALSO gotten (literal) blood on his handsâwe see him go to check for a pulse#after Zach did... but we don't see his hands during thatâthey're left out of the shot! we just see his face. and when we see his hands next#there's no visible blood on them (if any got on he theoretically wiped 'em off ig? similarly Zach's hands when seen AFTER the shot of him#touching Daryl ALSO don't rlly show blood anymoreâwe see his hands in the leaves tho so it prob went there) BUT SO there was a CHOICE made#to give us a close up shot of ZACH pulling his hand away from the wound with blood on it... but to NOT do the same/smthn similar with Josh.#and yet ZACH is the one who CAN'T ACCEPT THE ROLE HE PLAYED IN ANY OF ITTTTT!!!!!!! GAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!#this post brought to you by me rewatching the Zach + Charlie on the phone scene and needing to just. stop and scream at Zach being#like 'Joshâ or fucking somebody elseâ they went up there and if they found Daryl aliveâ' LIKE BRO. YOU *KNOW* HE WAS DEAD.#YOU KNOW. YOU KNOOOOW. YOU WERE THERE. YOU KNOW HE WAS ALREADY DEAD. the denial. the trying to find any fucking way that#there could be even a sliver of a possibility that it WASN'T even PARTIALLY his fault.... shifting the blame entirely onto Josh...#[plus like. the 'somebody else' only added in after Charlie was giving him shit for trying to complicate this moreâat first he was#straight up saying Josh was the one that fucked with the body]... aghghghsfd he makes me INSANE#also fwiw. i'm forever a 'Josh didn't harm anyone on purpose until AFTER his fight with Zach at Zach's house' truther. that provides#at least SOME sort of motivation to push him over an edge into... the shit that happens. anything before that just fuckin' doesn't make#sense. To Me. ive already written a lot on my thoughts about all of that though [uhhh in the tags of my gifset of the fight at Zach's house#anyways. im also NOT trying to say 'ah so we should Just Blame Zach' because nah nah this whole thing was a fucked up accident. they're all#to blame. plus Josh did horrible shit at the end On His Own there's no way of getting around thatâbut the messiness of how Zach handled the#initial incident and how that ripples out across the whole movie is simply soooooooo... ghghGHGhghGHGhghghgh. To Me.#in conclusion: im soooooooo normal about the characters in this movie (<- lying)
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Just leaving this one here - spawn Astarion's dialogue after a long rest.
#astarion#baldur's gate 3#holy shit#I can't believe this is real#I avoided spoilers about his dialogues prior to playing it myself now#and OMFG#I have no words#the mirror of him saying this is a gift I won't forget it just like he did when you let him drink from you the first time#the entirety of this game is poetic cinema#I'm emotional don't fucking touch me#baldur's gate 3 spoilers
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retconning stroud out of the deep roads so i can shove laure amell and the hawke siblings and varric and anders all into the same little camp. they would all have such a bad time
#carver: dying of blight. with an inferiority complex. but mostly dying#danie: MY BROTHER!!! MY BABY BROTJER HELP HIM!!!!!#anders: oh god oh fuck. wait a minute. i recognize this area. isnt this where the commander should be? oh hell#varric: we are all going to đŞŚdieâ°ď¸ in a đł hole. not even a GOOD hole#warden commander laure amell of ferelden and amaranthine: oh. anders. glad you're not dead or a darkspawn but Why The Fuck Are You Here#anders: oh hell. uh.#warden commander laure amell of ferelden and amaranthine: actually shut up. darkspawn incoming. its too open here so follow me to camp#'uh- commander-' 'shut it. there are shrieks about. this is a nasty area to be in with non-wardens' [glaring disapprovingly]#they awkwardly walk to camp. sigrun and a couple other wardens are there. they all sit down & drop their stuff#amell sits on a stump and pulls out a corked bottle. pops the cork. sniffs it. takes a swig. her white hair almost seems to glow?#she coughs then asks anders 'so why *are* you this far in the deep roads with a band of nonwardens? how'd you even get here?'#anders pulls out the map and hands it over. she looks at it. her expression darkens. she rolls up the map and says 'Anders.' he looks up.#she whaps him on the head with the map and gripes 'do you have ANY idea how long I spent looking for these fucking maps?!' whap 'you dick!'#she whaps him one more time then stuffs the maps into her bag. 'that still doesn't tell me WHY you're here. out with it.'#varric speaks up: 'my asshole brother locked us in a thaig. we came down on an expedition and found an idol that he betrayed us for'#amell frowns. 'a *thaig*? there aren't any records in the shaperate of any out this far. this isn't even a main branch of the deep roads.'#'it could be ancient!' sigrun offers 'or an unsavory secret the shaperate 'lost'. like Caridin?' amell nods & turns back to varric.#'so you're looking for a way out.' they nod. 'and just happened to come by this way?' anders says 'no commander- we need your help.'#amell takes another swig of her bottle. her hair is definitely glowing slightly. 'who *doesn't* these days. but for a pair of old friends-'#she winks at anders. 'what is it you need?' danie interrupts. '-please- my brother is sick- if you can't help him he'll die!'#amell looks at hawke then at carver. gets up and steps over to him. kneels in front of him and unceremoniously grabs his face#tilts his chin up (carotid + jugular blackened) peels his eyelid back (sclera greying and bloodshot) pries open his mouth (tongue greying)#then releases his head and stands shaking her hands. 'oh yeah. that's blight for sure. this is why you sought me out?' anders nods.#'we'll take him. but you know- he may not survive the joining.' 'any chance is better than letting him die!' 'i agree.' amell says coolly.#'youre lucky. we can do it here but the prep will take time. rest. eat. be on your guard. and DO NOT touch my whiskey if you're not a mage.'#it takes like a day of prep. also no one has used amell's name so they havent figured out the Cousins thing yet#eventually amell pulls carver over to the fire and hands him a cup of the joining potion and says 'you get one warning. *don't flinch.*'#he drinks it. he lives. but he's unconscious. amell sends the party on their way#to anders: here. i found this not long after you left. *hands him the phylactery* you and justice be careful. it's getting chaotic out there#to hawke: for what it's worth im sorry. if ever you need the wardens' assistance i grant it under the authority of warden-commander amell
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good fucking food
#tomgreg#OH GOD OH FUCK#greg has agreed to do whatever tom has asked every time and this is the first time he's been like#no actually i'm gonna go to the bros myself despite the fact that tom told him not to#and tom's already taken the hit of nate being invited to the party which is still a sore spot#bc it was supposed to be his and sh*v's party just like it was supposed to be his and sh*vs wedding yet nate is there. again.#so he's like. ok greg let's strategise [i find strategy sexy] make me feel secure with you#and when greg does in fact not do that... oh man. tom's face he's noooot happy about it!!!#his voice goes all high pitched and he does an expression actually similar to sh*v lol#like FINE WHATEVER I DONT CARE DO WHAT YOU WANT [narrator voice: he did in fact care a lot]#but then he touches greg's back!!!!! aaargahrga! tom you are so transparent!!!! he's so very clearly attached to both sh*v and greg#like atp i don't care. he feels similarly to greg as he does to sh*v i've seen enough evidence this season to prove that to me#as in. feelings. romantically. when they hurt him he still loves them and is gentle with them until he can't take it any more.#i don't know when we'll see what happens with greg maybe next episode GOD#if the firing thing does happen which i don't want!!!! god!!!!! maybe THEN we'll see it#maybe an argument somewhat like his and sh*v's tho obviously not to the scale but like. WHO HAS HAD YOUR BACK THIS WHOLE TIME#WHO HAS EVER LOOKED AFTER YOU IN THIS FUCKING FAMILY#god. i need to seeee that. don't just leave it hangin jesse i'm begging you bestie#but like he is soooo bpd it is actually insane. i shake his hand#also ''team kenro'' probably wasn't grea tfor him to hear adksjds#WDYM TEAM KENRO DONT YOU MEAN TEAM NERSPOR >:(((
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Did anyone want to tell me that the talking phase of dating feels like 5d chess, and a bunch of tiny knives, and causes stress induced illness????
#okay im being dramatic#BUT#im analyzing every single text and every single interaction trying to figure out what he actually might mean#and where this is going#and for the LIFE of me i still don't know if he actually wants to date me or just fuck me#and as has been Well chronicaled due to my complete inability to NOT post my most personal details on Tumblr:#i am not interested in sleeping with him any time soon because i have like 100 problems with it that cannot be explained#but im also not Not interested in it at a later time. its just not right now#and yeah i would love to go hangout at your apartment and watch tv and cook dinner#together but if you put even the slightest pressure on me to sleep with you i am prepared to throw everything away#and thats not good either! i know that I cant be this avoidant but fuck i can't shove it down either#if you touch me gently i might throw up and i might also cry#i absolutely am not interested in taking this further right now#FUCK#ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh#vent post#pointless posts
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Every single Cigarettes After Sex song makes me so stressed because I get so many fic ideas, and I can't write any of them cause I'm going to be writing vampire johnny for the rest of my life
#Why are all of their songs so moz and johnny#The smart idea would be don't listen to them but in the meantime I can't stop listening to them#I just need 13 more sets of hands and 5 other brains to write all my little weird snippets#Johnny all drunk and coyly acting like a moz is his headmaster and wanting to be bent over and have his ass beat#Johnny sending Moz racy pictures throughout the day of him in a pair of lace knickers#Like where you can just barely see them over his jeans#Johnny too fucked up on coke to do much of anything but moz sits on his lap and touches himself and comes all over him#Meanwhile i can't do anything other than rewrite giant chunks of vampire Johnny#aaaaaaaaaa#And of course my stupid ass is like oh hey we should write a book#If only i could write faster#marrissey fic ideas#marrissey thoughts#fic things
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did u lick the aki card
I DON'T HAVE IT YET BUT DON'T WORRY WHEN I'VE GOT IT IN MY HANDS I'LL BE GIVING IT A NICE GOOD LICK!
#mmmmmm aki cardboard#just getting that shit is getting placed straight in a toploader and never getting touched again so it can stay pristine forever#as insane as I am I'm trying to make this into a family heirloom#many years from now when the price of aki cards has raised astronomically#I will sell my card for a large fortune and use it to retire and put me and aki's five kids through college#can't have saliva damaging any surfaces#ugh.... don't make me wonder what it tastes like..... I'll want to do it#I definitely licked my screen when I saw that art of him the first time tho I'll tell you that#ask mags#*kidding not getting...#why did I say the same word three times the aki is really rotting my fucking brain and you can clearly tell
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