#like am i someone or am i no one perceived to be someone

[hintze-of-bird]

I’ve not been around for a hot second, but posts surrounding physical nonhumanity keep surfacing in my dash (which is always a joy to see; it’s nice knowing there’s a good talonful of us around).

I will not be sharing my opinions regarding the current debates, as I’m not entirely confident I’ve acquired enough context, but I will be sharing my own experience of physical nonhumanity — just in case someone finds solace in any similarities!

I perceive my physicality as subjective. That is to say, I am certain that my body is not a human body, regardless of its occupant, but this is not a widely recognised sentiment, especially through the lens of biology, and biological definitions of species. While I am confident that my perception is a correct one, I realise that it is not something I can prove, and something that could be debated against.

My outward presentation is not typical to that of a raptor. I lack feathers. I have no beak. Ultraviolet light is not something my eyes can perceive. I’d even go as far as saying my internal anatomy is unlikely to be as avian as I’d like to hope. These are all observations even I have made. However, no one has ever analysed my genetic material. No one has looked at me at theart level and deemed me human. I hold a Schrödinger’s cat attitude towards my genome because of this — we don’t know for certain that my DNA is human, so I’m choosing to be optimistic about it. I have bird DNA, because it has not been proven otherwise.

My phenotype can be reasoned by the silencing of genes. Cells do not express all the genes they contain — processes can prevent them from doing so — by hindering transcription, for example (in the case of methylation). There’s nothing that proves I do not have raptorial genes that are simply just not expressed. (Well, not entirely, at least.)

I know this belief is somewhat pseudoscientific, but it is a comforting thought. ^v^

Additionally, I choose to describe my physical identity as being paravian. It’s a little bit of wordplay, seeing as it vaguely translates to bird-adjacent, but is also a testament to the non-biological nature of my identity.

Seeing as my bird-ness isn’t recognised by science, there’s no reason for me to be scientifically precise about it. There are select species that feel particularly close to my body, such as several birds of prey and Sinornithosaurus. I do use them to represent myself a lot of the time. However, exclusively describing myself to this degree of specificity feels disingenuous, especially since I don’t qualify by species definitions.

The use of an entire clade (Paraves), which encompasses all the potential species my body could be, feels far more fitting.

[teh-nos]

deleting tumblr posts because i only wanted to vent to about 12 people not get into stupid fights with an entire website for the rest of my fucking life.

[kittykatninja321]

See the reason why I will always be down with the poc Jason headcanon is because I look at the way his lashing out as a grieving child gets interpreted/demonized as “anger issues”, and the way Bruce at times projected “anger issues” onto him that weren’t actually there and also immediately assumed that Jason was bound to become a dangerous criminal unless he intervened despite the fact that Jason was just trying to survive and said himself that he “didn’t wanna be a crook” and didn’t show violent inclinations until AFTER he became Robin and I go “idk, sounds kinda racialized to me buddy, hitting you with the melanin beam”. Now we know the real reason for this is classism but classism and racism are right next to each other on the periodic table so it doesn’t not fit yknow?

[eyewyrm]

noel and identity loss...

trying to articulate why it feels wrong to call him charlie, because thats still him but at the same time not.

he's changed and things cant go back to the way they were, noel took up a new name one to remember but also to move on

i don't think noel is a fake name to him more so just a new identity he's taken up as an extension of himself. or at least someone he's rebuilt himself as after the dreamlands. i don't think he's discarded charlie as an identity but that he just has two names that are both very real to him, however just one of them is more in the forefront than the other so he'd be unused to his old name being used.

but i also think that he'd feel extremely disconnected to his old life and name that it would be uncomfortable and feel wrong for him, might feel that his past is catching up to him or maybe he'd be afraid that if he stops using noels name he'd be abandoning him in some way

or just using the name as an escape from the king in yellow who likely would've called him by his original name

i recognise this is like probably nothing at all but it is rotating in my brain and i need to get it out, i love saying shit and being completely incoherent

[kaiserouo]

i need more rhino heirloom art

[torchickentacos]

do you have any pokeani fic recs for the classic vibe (read: the content is unhinged and wild)

Referencing this post- long reply but I give a few pointers in these fics' direction at the end!

I'm gonna be so honest anon, I'm not sure I want to actively rec some of them 😭 A lot of them are very of-their-time (usually 2007-2013) and, while HILARIOUS, often contain things that I really don't want to 'recommend' (homophobia, sexism, a lot of slutshaming, some REALLY out of pocket stuff that is not properly warned for, etc). OBVIOUSLY I am not reccing the yikes of things so much as the rest of it (the hilarious unhinged side), but the current fandomscape leans bad-faith and assumey and I'm just not keen to fuck around and find out tbh. Ye olde fic reccing takes a level of understanding of other time periods and attitudes and customs in fandom and on FFN that I'm... not sure that all of tumblr is always very good at tbh lol. If you guys really want me to and if we can all understand that it was a different time and that enjoyment of batshit insane fics does not equal agreement with everything said or depicted in them, then come back and I'll consider it again. But for now, I'm MORE than happy to tell you guys the best ways to find them on your own lmao. It's not hard once you get it down, and anything I'd rec, I've found through this method.

First off, FFN's search system is just frustrating imo. Between a less-than-intuitive UI and people not bothering to tag characters and ships and genres properly, using it the same way you'd filter stuff on Ao3 is a fool's errand (unless you're doing it by word count/completed/etc, which is objective and automatically tallied I think). You're better off using key words. I usually ignore the filters. The only thing I filter by is fandom at the start page (all of Pokemon is under 'games' in FFN and I don't bother narrowing it down to animeverse personally due to aforementioned mistagging or an entire lack thereof).

So, what key words do I use? When looking for that specific brand of insane campy 2000s kitschy wild unhinged stuff, I usually default to searches like "PS CS IS" (poke contest ikari, there's a lotta stuff in there, sometimes there's ORS/LGS/OS/ES/AS etc and you won't always know the acronym and it's just a surprise tbh) or trope related searches like "Assassin" or "High school" or "Vampire" other words you might find in a summary. You can also search by character names (in the search bar and not in the actual filters, which are not reliable in my experience). I'd say to go for tropes and AUs as far as keywords go. I'd ALSO say to not filter by completed, because that'll filter out a lot of two-week-passion-projects that someone dropped as soon as it got flamed, and there's some fun ones in there.

That's about it, but if you find one good fic then it's worth checking the rest of what the writer has. A lot of them have a bunch of unfinished fics and there's some hidden gems. Have a good time reading, and the search is half the fun! Come back with any funny lines you find if you want :)

[gleppy]

i wish people misunderstanding and misinterpreting my words wasnt as bad of a stress trigger for me as it is but holy fuck there are few things that make me fly off the rails more lmao

[kaisollisto]

“How long have you been here?” She prods, bumping her gently with her foot still keeping the couple of inches of distance between them. The storm had passed 20 minutes ago and Ava had insisted on exploring as much as she could before nightfall.

“Does it matter? There’s no use dwelling on the passage of time.” Beatrice can feel bitterness lingering on her tongue. It feels like rejection, it feels like Ava has peeled back the layers of Beatrice, glanced at her and decided no thanks. They’re sat on a lumpy rock, Beatrice can feel how worn it is and wonders when she started feeling the same.

Ava pauses, before bringing her gaze from the space below them to Beatrice’s eyes. “It does to me.” Ava has a soft look in her eyes that makes Beatrice want to lash out. She looks away, she doesn’t need this, whatever it may be, whatever Ava chooses to wrap under the word ‘care’.

She takes a deep breath, hoping to still her emotions of misplaced anger. It’s not like Beatrice to get emotional, but after years of isolation, she supposes it’s bound to happen. “Days, years, maybe decades, it’s been a long time.” Beatrice gazes deeply into the horizon, how many times had she wished for this, someone to share the sunset with?

Ava hums and Beatrice turns to look at her. Her face turns to the direction of where Beatrice was once looking, admiring the view. Ava’s face is illuminated by the setting sun, she doesn’t have any blemishes or bumps on her skin. Ava is probably what humans would consider perfect. Beatrice doesn’t know what to think of her, doesn’t want to dwell on it either. She knows better than anyone what that could mean for her.

“For a such a shitty planet you’ve got a nice view.” Ava quips, Beatrice isn’t quite sure what she wants her to say. So she breathes, she closes her eyes gripping the rough stone beneath them and exhales.

“Yeah,” she can feel something rise in her. It balloons from the tips of her toes and forces it’s way up her throat. It curdles on her tongue bitter tasting, everything tastes bitter to Beatrice now. She swallows hard, wallowing in the silence procured between them.

“So, you’re like a MILF or something?” Ava jokes, Beatrice misses the uneasy expression on Ava’s face when she chokes and the smile that follows.

She hacks up spit from her lungs and feels the pressure in her throat loosen, “What?” Beatrice breathes raggedly as she clears her airway. “What could have led you to believe that?”

Ava has the nerve to look sheepishly as she shrugs her shoulders to her ears, “I mean DSP9 is basically your child? And you’re, uh,” Ava flushes as she frantically waves her arms between the two of them. “Yanno, um, h- attractive for your, um species? Race? You’re just pleasing to the eye, at least my eye. But not just pleasing! You’re like plenty smart! Living here on this desolate planet with so little you must be very fit, and survival-y.” Ava trails off blushing a profuse red.

Beatrice would be more concerned if her translator wasn’t struggling to decipher the speed of her words.

[todayisafridaynight]

YOU MAKE THAT POST AND DON'T SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON EVERYONE'S OPINION ON SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG???

I MEAN IT'S SUCH A NICHE FUCKING TOPIC LMAO I DIDN'T THINK ANYONE WOULD CARE

but anyway here's the Egregiously Simplified version of Everyone Is Forced To Play Ten Routes Of Shadow The Hedgehog And Has To Give Their Opinion Afterwards

[uchiha-gaeshi]

I’m calling off my SI/OC fic.

[thevegetablewhichnoonedaresname]

.

[thefrogdalorian]

Having of those moments where I wish to yeet the like button into the sun or maybe make it so there was setting you could turn on so that people can only reblog posts (even better with the minimum requirement of adding at least one tag)!!

It's kind of absurd that one of my fics is getting close to 500 notes while simultaneously being one I've had the least actual human interactions come from. Like...... come on, that's now how it should be AT ALL!

Don't get me wrong, I'm so thrilled people are clearly finding it and I guess enjoying it(??) but just having endless likes without people letting me know what they enjoyed about it or even if they liked it kind of makes me sad. That's not why I want to share my writing here!

I love having those little human connections with others. I don't ever want my writing to feel transactional. I would love to talk to more people about things I've written. It's truly one of the best feelings and I would hate to lose that, the more I write or the more notes my fics get. Please don't be shy!! I get the social anxiety, but there is no reason to be. I am truly just a Din Djarin obsessed loser.

Anyway, whine over. I don't want to focus on the negatives here and I appreciate every single person who has ever left a positive interaction with something I've written. You are truly a light!

[emcads]

I’m not sure how exactly to phrase this but let yourself be genuine about your interests. not everything has to be ironic you can be cringe fail and wholeheartedly obsessed with something and it’s a lot more charming than the sardonic false coolness. we are all here for a short time and a good time and liking weird stuff with other weird people is one of life’s rare pleasures.

[stargazerdaisy]

I'm so overstimulated, have been the past couple of days, and I can't put my finger on exactly why. I feel like I shouldn't be, because it's not like I've had an overwhelming amount of stimuli. I'm definitely super tired and feel like I haven't gotten enough quantity or quality of rest, so that's probably the culprit - my threshold is really low. I have zero patience, I'm yelling, and I'm on the verge of tears. I can't stand people talking to me, I don't want to think about anything extra, I am feeling a hard core urge to run away and check into a hotel. I want quiet, I want no demands or questions or tasks, I want to watch what I want on TV, and I want to breakdown in tears and then just stare at the walls with white noise playing. I do not want to be a partner, parent, or employee right now.

[f1owermoon]

thinking abt the ways ive heard people describe me and going 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹💘💘💘💘💘🫶🫶🫶🫶

[genius--built]

yknow it is the internet and all, so I can’t really say I could’ve expected better. but the last drawing I posted was not intended to be ship art. I would’ve been up front about it if that had been my intent. I’ve gone and tagged it at the request of a few people, but this is not a blog where I will be posting stuff that should result in genuinely threatening asks, so I’d appreciate some civility. I’ve been here less than 2 weeks, you don’t even know me.