#like am i going to look at every interaction they had in the earlier seasons differently now?

[multifandomangel]

yesterday i saw an edit of early seasons hotch and jj to the song “teacher’s pet” by melanie martinez and… i don’t know how i feel about it… like am i mildly interested in this ship now? maybe… BUT IT FEELS WRONG CAUSE THE EDIT THAT GOT ME ONTO IT WAS LITERALLY TO A SONG ABOUT A SUPER MANIPULATIVE AGE GAP RELATIONSHIP

[lemotmo]

Okay I'm going to partially tell on myself. I am new, as in the Buck/T kiss showed up all over my dash, as did all of Oliver's interviews and I just thought he was the yummiest most delightful human being I had ever seen and heard (my god is accent is heaven) new. And I thought that first kiss was really well done. It was a great scene. Now, that being said, I didn'twant to jump into a show that was seven seasons into the story with zero context, except the stuff I had been seeing on my dash for years. So I started from the beginning, with the full intent and excitement of getting to T in season 7. Imagine my surprise when he popped up occasionally in earlier seasons. His only good part was when we were supposed to believe that Chim could lift him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, haha. That was great.

Anyway by the time I made it to season 7, it was too late. I had just watched 5 seasons of Buck and Eddie. There was zero room for T to compete on any level. Which is why the behavior of some is so confusing to me. Let me say first that I do not think the show always intended to put Buck and Eddie together, I don't think that's been the intention since the beginning. There is however a very good case to make that Eddie's introduction was Buck's actual Bi bell ringing moment though (*what a man plays in the background*). I do however agree that the writing has trended, increasingly so, in that direction. The writers do not hold all the blame however, Oliver and Ryan have kind of acted them into a corner. There are several scenes, multiple scenes, where the acting choices the two of them made were interesting, to say the least (looking at you 'go for the title' kitchen scene I love. Buck was flirting on every possible level in that scene).

Sorry, I got off track, back to my point. The people like me, who came in after the kiss popped up everywhere, being all in on T is somewhat fine. The problem would be the ones who are deliberately refusing to go back and watch the entire series before pontificating on B/T being destiny and all that other nonsense. There is an argument to be made that they're avoiding it because they know most of the history dismantles their current ship fixation. So as a result those people can be easily dismissed because they have zero context to any of their opinions. The ones who were with you all for 5 seasons though, yes I've seen their posts, who lost their shit over 2 pairs of lips touching, is what I cannot wrap my brain around. I completely understand the excitement behind that first kiss. It was a much anticipated moment for BUCK. He was the important person in that scene.

But confusing, or deliberately misinterpreting, Buck's revelation and sigh of relief at finally figuring out something pretty significant about himself, as being about him finding T is a gymnastics act I did not expect to see from so many long haulers. I mean, it should be obvious but T wasn't important in that scene. His gender was what was important. Which is why they have barely bothered to show him since that episode. And the interactions they have shown, minus the hospital kiss, that they made sure to show Eddie's reaction to btw, have all been red flag scenes. Little things that show this relationship isn't really that different from his previous relationships. Buck may have figured out the gender part but he's still making the same relationship mistakes. It's why the few scenes they've had together, and it's the bare minimum of effort, have been about Buck trying to initiate some level of communication and emotional connection and him being dismissed or having it turned into a daddy kink joke. I also think Oliver's enthusiasm dipped drastically by the end and it showed.

Which brings me to Eddie. The show, and more so, Oliver and Ryan have already done the hard part. The emotional connection, which is way more difficult to pull off than a physical connection, is already there. Their chemistry is already established.They're partners in every way but physically. As a result it is not a huge character leap to eventually bring a physical relationship into it as well. That will not be a shocking character development for either character. It goes back to the way the two have been written and they way Oliver and Ryan have interrupted those scenes. I won't touch their interviews because I think it's pretty clear, at this point, they seem to agree it's the way to go. There's more story to explore with them learning how to navigate an actual relationship than there is in bringing in other, lesser characters, to firstly try to compete with that connection, and then try to establish endgame status. I don't know. It's not about any two pairs of lips touching it's about the right two pairs of lips touching. Because when it's the right couple the characters get that sigh and exhale of finally! But the audience gets their sigh and exhale of finally as well. That is the point.

Sorry this got looooong 🤣

Ooooh Nonny, you speak right to my heart.

First of all, thank you for going back all the way to season 1 to actually sit down and watch the show. We aren't just making up Buddie. It has been there since the beginning. I'm so glad you got to witness their beautiful history together and that you realised just how right they are for each other.

I can't speak for the people who suddenly turned 180° and dropped Buddie for BT. I have been shipping Buddie from season 2, so I don't understand their reasoning or motivation either. It like you said so beautifully:

"It's not about any two pairs of lips touching. It's about the right two pairs of lips touching."

And that is what it comes down to. We can be content with a lackluster, meaningless relationship for queer rep. Or we can be exhilerated with an amazingly complex and years in the making relationship, which will be so much better for queer rep. It will be revolutionary in so many ways to make a slow burn queer ship canon.

(Before anyone comes at me for talking about queer rep. I have slowly been figuring myself out over the last couple of years and, looking back at my life and relationships, I've come to realise that I definitely belong somewhere on the ace spectrum. Not sure where exactly, I'm still searching for the right label, but it feels right to me. This is actually the first time I said this on a public forum for people to read. Kinda scary to be honest.)

I know what I would choose for myself if I was faced with these two options. Why wouldn't we automatically choose this for Buck and Eddie as well? It's mind-boggling really.

So yeah: queer Eddie and Buddie canon in season 8! All the way!

Don't apologise for your great post. I loved reading it. Feel welcome to drop in whenever you want. :)

[eddiediazismyhusband]

hey everyone

just getting on here to have a conversation about some things that i need to clear up.

so for starters, i’m going to come right out and say that i’m taking a break from tumblr… lately i have been subjected to seeing multiple thinly veiled posts about me floating around and i cannot sit by and allow myself to be treated like that

that being said, i am taking this break to focus on my mental health; 911 used to be a comfort show to me- somewhere i could just go to and watch whenever i needed to be picked up, because even if the show was still forcing certain storylines/arcs, they at least made some sense for the characters and didn’t rely on completely rewriting and ignoring their history within the narrative.

911 is no longer that for me anymore. tim minear and the writing team have ruined any and all enjoyment i got from earlier seasons due to continuing KR’s trend of completely retconning the narrative while simultaneously blatantly dragging us along by dangling buddie canon over our heads with a stick only to immediately snatch it away at the last second.

today’s “first look” article only further confirmed my suspicions that tim had no intentions of leading to buddie canon.

i see the takes/theories about what the article could mean, but we have made theories such as this every year only for it to not go anywhere; nothing had indicated that s8 will be any different.

for starters, tim is bringing back a known problematic actor to play a problematic character that tim continues to retcon, despite the fandom being outspoken about how insane this is. instead of listening to the fandom, instead he has them continuing to develop their chemistry-less relationship saying that they are going strong.

secondarily, tim wrote out a beloved poc character in order to keep this problematic character around- something that i think the fandom has moved on from a little too quickly

thirdly, we continue to be told that eddie will be making progress each season, yet we never actually see that progress happen, and if we do, never in a way that is actually in character; on top of that, we have fans begging for his character to be ruined simply so that his character arc will be sexualized due to it involving two conventionally attractive men.

this fandom no longer feels like a safe space for me mentally and i hate that… i am devastated at the thought of no longer interacting with my mutuals, but i cannot engage with content that showcases the real-time decline of a show i used to adore before the creators decided to ruin that enjoyment.

so i am taking a bit of my break; i dont know how long nor how permanent of a break this is, but i need to put my mental health first.

until next time (whenever that may be)

[technicalthinker]

I feel like debating who Loki was talking to when he said "For You" in the last episode, is missing the point of the scene. And people referring to it as "cowardly" and a "no-homo" moment is just?? Baffling to me tbh because like;

First of all, it is obviously intended to be to both of them? If they only wanted to make it about Sylvie, Mobius wouldn't be there. If they only wanted to make it about Mobius, Sylvie wouldn't be there. If they wanted to make it about everyone they would've just framed it more equally, he does do it for all his friends ("for all of us"), but they have that scene to highlight these two specific relationships. The framing is quite clear, they have him take a last look at all of his friends before going down the stairs, but Mobius and Sylvie runs after him to have a final significant moment.

Which absolutely makes sense and is consistent with the show we have seen so far, s1 and s2 combined, which is what I love about it. And it was to be honest a surprise! Going into this season, I had little hope for Loki/Mobius interactions, just didn't want to expect too much since S1 had a lot of their connection, but that could've been it. I was shocked when s2ep1 was full to the brim with Loki and Mobius scenes? And then they kept reinforcing every week that they care about each other, is a funny duo to watch, and are important to one another.

And despite this, I expected the rug to at some point be pulled, especially compared to Loki's relationship to Sylvie. No matter people's personal viewing on the show, she is still cited as a love interest by showrunners and is just portrayed as that by the narrative a lot of the time. Sidelining that, even in s2 when the romantic hints are more vague, she's still a very important person in Loki's life. She played a central part of the plot and Loki's own character development of understanding himself.

So to me, I was surprised seeing Mobius and Sylvie side by side in the end. Both being framed as The important people in Loki's life. Then, however you wanna see in what ways they are important is up to you, but they are the people he keeps coming back to for advice and self-reflection. You can frame it as "oh it should've been only been Mobius and they added Sylvie to downplay it", which, I just disagree with (If they wanted to go for explicitly canon Lokius they needed to set that up even more earlier in the season but that's a post for another day). Sylvie is still like, a constant in the narrative and driving force of s1, even if s2 changes things around a bit, and imo it would be inconsistent if she just vanished here. I guess I am used to media that downplays a meaningful dynamic between two dudes in more aggressive ways, which they absolutely could've done, and would've taken me out of the story to be honest... but they didn't, Mobius and Sylvie got to be side by side in the end and that imo validated the Loki/Mobius dynamic way more than downplays it.

TLDR; The "For you" was for both Mobius and Sylvie because why would you frame it that way otherwise, and having them side by side like that validates Lokius way more than downplays it in a "no-homo" way considering the full context of the show.

[stars-n-spice]

Thoughts on s3 ep 12!

Ooh boy, finally got the chance to watch this baby, y'know how it goes: spoilers and inconsistent, incoherent screaming under the cut-

Ayo when the FUCK are we going to get a Clone X reveal HUH???

TANTISS BASE I HATE YOUR UGLY ASS OHHH MY GOD

Emerie seeing Omega again :(

"For what it's worth, I'm glad you're safe" - "Am I?" FUCK

PUTTING OMEGA IN THE VAULT?? okay but I want to see her interact with all the other kiddos :(

Emerie is so going to do something to help the kids and I'm so scared it'll end with her sacrifice

THEY STILL HAVEN'T EXPLAINED LIKE,, EMERIE AS A WHOLE LIKE, HELLO??

SO MANY QUESTIONS?? SO LITTLE EPISODES LEFT???

Hemlock I hope you choke

EUUGHHEHH so happy they didn't time skip so upset that they didn't show us the conversation Crosshair had to have with Wrecker and Hunter about what happened to Omega but like,, I'm disappointed but not surprised

The angst potential and then it was just,,, Wrecker being grumpy and Hunter being like, "okay, well let's just move on and figure something out"

I mean, I guess I'm happy they aren't fighting or whatever but still

fuck,, Crosshair's hands,,, I was just waiting for one of them to like,, grab them or something like,,

Crosshair not telling them he knew somewhat how to get to the base because he's terrified of going back

baby what the FUCK did they do to you there???

aaahh,, that whole conversation was painful

ALSO IS IT JUST ME OR IS HUNTER GETTING SMALLER??

Every time he's in frame with his brothers he seems to shrink?? Like after this episode I went back to watch random clips from the earlier seasons in Korean and Hunter didn't look as small/short as he does now???

Tell me I'm not going crazy,, I swear this man gets shorter everytime I see him and his waist gets skinnier

PHEE AND CROSSHAIR INTERACTION FINALLY!!!

"Sparkling personality" IM-

HEY THOSE HIDDEN PASSAGES WOULD'VE BEEN NICE TO KNOW ABOUT FUCKING LIKE,, THREE EPISODES AGO!!!!!

waauughhh I love Phee's ship,, the colors the shapes,, it's like a little fishy or something,, fucking love it

FUCKIN ADMIRAL RAMPART!?!?!? i was not expecting that

Burst out laughing when they showed his face though,, and for some reason I thought he looked like Jordan Klepper

Was absolutely cracking up over all the interactions between Rampart and the boys,, fucking,, manhandling him like a rag doll?? The banter between him and Cross? fucking gold

PHEE'S PILOTING??? OMG - Hera would've loved it

Also love how she gave them like,,, zero warning,, not even a "Hey, you might wanna strap in" I love her

I love Phee I love her I love her I love her

My jaw was like,, on the floor the entire time they were in that transport,, the fucking animation,, the action,, all of it aaggghh

Even my mom's cat who is an absolute menace stopped biting me for once to sit and watch that whole scene

"Wrecker, remember plan 55?" - "*silence* OH yeah!!" - WRECKER MI VIDA

wonder what the fuck Rampart is yapping about

I MISS ECHO SO MUCH WHAT THE FUCK

BRING HIM BACK WE'VE GOT LIKE. WHAT?? THREE EPISODES?? FOUR EPISODES LEFT??? AND HE'S HAD LIKE LESS THAN TEN MINUTES OF SCREEN TIME??? FCKING HELL WHAT THE FUCK I'M AAGUUGHHHH

this episode wasn't as painful as I thought it was going to be and idk if that was a good thing or not

Disappointed, yet not surprised, but I still had fun <- could literally be applied to a lot of TBB episodes

but like,,

auughhhhhhh

I can't believe it's almost over

[most-canon-non-canon-ship-poll]

they're toxic + mike is gay and in denial

Why Mileven is shit - a submission-based essay, part 1/3

Mileven - a currently canon het ship from the Stranger Things fandom between Michael (Mike) Wheeler and Jane (Eleven) Ives/Hopper/Byers/IDK

12 years old girl raised in a lab is thrown in a relationship with the first boy she ever meets. They constantly fight, lie to each other and develop a unhealthy co-dependent bond. The boy has a close ambiguous relationship with his male best friend which leads a good part of the fandom thinking that he is actually gay. People who stan this ship constantly throw homophobic slurs to this male best friend and some even argue that they hope he dies of AIDS next season

Where do I even begin. I do not care what anyone says the chemistry is not there. Another cog in the Should Have Never Been Written As A Couple machine. What made them cute in earlier seasons was their platonic dynamic and Mike's kindhearted nature to help her. It is hilarious this is apparently their "flagship" and "main" couple when they have the least amount of chemistry and the poorest written out of the others. They are not their best selves together, not only hurting themselves, but the people around them. Mostly Will, which is clear as day in Season 4. At the end of Season 4 I am so to the nth tired of the same shit different shovel with them. I am probably too gay to see The Vision fans of them see, but I do have eyes and it looks to me like they've been slowly crumbling. There is no foundation for their relationship they were barley friends a week before Mike kissed her and then she vanished for a year. They maybe had a little bit of interaction between closing the Gate and Snow Ball. Kissed again. Then spent all summer making out and ditching their friends until El comically broke up with him. Their relationship is exhausting to watch. The drama eats up too much screen time. I am tired of watching them hurting themselves staying together. There is no meaningful conversations since maybe Season 2. In Season 4 what could have been one ended poorly and the other interrupted comically. They've dragged out the Mike saying "I love you" story line, seemingly concluding it while El was being strangled in a Mind Scape trying to save Max who was also in said Mind Scape being slowly to tortured to death. Said confession prompted by using Will's own veiled confession disguised as El's an episode earlier. Plus Will using his own words to encourage Mike to help her. He did to help her, but that was painful to watch there was so much going on! Then they expect me to believe they're better than ever afterwards when there is nothing to indicate that? I need them to break up please free them. Free me. I am over it bro.

My propaganda is *drum roll*. Season 4. That's it. I am putting faith in the other haters to submit something coherent. I do not have the energy unfortunately. It is shit now, but would be even more shit if they finish the show endgame. I do not care about them. I want focus on the supernatural plot!! I want focus on characters and conversations that don't revolve around or circle to their relationship! I don't want to see another character to become a mouth peice for Opening Their Eyes and What Really Matters and they'll "Work out." I am exhausted of third parties putting more effort into Mileven than Mike and El themselves. I want them to be their own people because they come off miserable together. They both vocalize their pain and no one that ships them cares! I have never in my years of watching shows have seen such a terrible,boring and annoying couple championed as much as Mileven. Every other canon couple in the show is miles better, yet are over shadowed. They are holding together by Elmer's glue and popsicle sticks. Them being boyfriend and girlfriend means nothing to me when the chemistry is not there. Final propaganda- Most of the more vocal fans are homophobic and go out of their way to harass others.

Two incredibly written characters that have so much potential outside of a relationship. seriously their relationship is absolutely erasing all and any personality that the show gave them separately. That and they're just incredibly toxic, el literally met mike almost first thing after living in a lab her entire life, she has no reason to start a romantic relationship, especially at that age. mike is also super insecure, and using el's love towards him to ease said insecurities. incredibly unhealthy on both sides how this became the main ship of the show absolutely BAFFLES the fuck out of me

[purpledaisiesthings]

CAMERON VO AND SCOTT FORRESTER

Warning: I deeply apologize for all the bad quality GIFs you're about to see.

Ok, so I do understand Scott had a thing with Kellet (and they're probably gonna bring up that storyline again 😒), but tbh I'm not really a fan. I'm not big on off-screen romance development and theirs was developed off screen🤷🏾‍♀️ plus honestly I just like seeing Scott and Cam together on my screen Lol 😄 (they're hot 🤭). I'm always glued to the screen when they show up.

Also, Raines and Vo are cute but I'm also not a fan. Sorry 😬

Anyways, the moment these characters were introduced I saw something there. They had an immediate chemistry that set the tone of their future interactions. They butted heads in the beginning. Then he disregarded the advice of her previous FBI superior and kept Vo in the team. In that first episode, I already learned so much about Scott's character and his leadership of the team because of his interactions with Vo. And as the episodes came, we saw more of the depth of their scenes/interactions together and how much similar they actually are.

I definitely harbored (and still do harbor) a desire for them to get together romantically, but it was just me in my shipper heart having my usual shipping delusions. It wasn't until S01E16 that I feel like my shipping of them was validated. I don't care what anyone says, that was a Vo/Forrester ship episode Lol 😄

That episode was a Vo centered episode.

It was an episode where Vo was dragged into a case by an old friend Nick who she later found out to be involved in the very crime they were investigating.

Now, Vo was obviously questioned and had given all the info she could on this guy. But Scott still chose to ask again which ok, it makes sense as he is her boss.

But then he chooses to ask her again. This time, he asks directly if she had a romantic relationship with Nick. Again, I guess since he's her boss he would need every single info on their connection in order to determine if she's compromised. Right? I get it.

Side note: After asking her, he moves closer to her (2nd gif) and then that stare down he gave her (3rd gif)? ooof...that was hot sorry 🔥

Earlier in that episode he was telling Raines that he didn't have to trust Nick because he trusted Vo. But then what did he do again? He's talking to Nick this time and tries to get info on whether or not him and Vo had dated, even after Vo had told him nothing like that happened. Bare in mind that Vo already discussed Nick with him three times. THREE times.

Too much? Just to know if Vo was romantically involved with this dude? If he wanted to know if Vo was compromised with Nick, aren't there other reasons aside romance that she would be. Like maybe she's returning a favor. The funny thing is Vo had actually mentioned earlier that she owed him a favor because he's saved her a few times in the past. I mean, that would also be a good enough reason for Forrester to follow up on if he actually thought she was compromised. If she feels she owes him, she might also feel obligated to cover up for him, right?

I thought this was all so suspicious 🤔. That episode definitely solidified my shipping for them. Also, I'm sorry but the storyline for Vo and Forrester being together will be so much more interesting. I'm not even going to dive into that discussion and the different romantic tropes that could come from that lol.

Bonus GIF from the episode: their stares.

Look at the first GIF below, and just watch how Forrester watches her get up and follows her with his head as she walks out 😆. Then the second with them staring at eachother just oozing hotness 🔥😜

I must admit I haven't caught up to the latest episodes from season 2, but I do know there's a new character that has joined the team, Damien Powell. He happens to be an old friend of Scott's and also Vo's new love interest. I don't think Scott knows about them hooking up yet but I am very curious to see his reaction to this in season 3. Hoping I would get some sort of concern from his end. But at the very least, I should get a scene with just them two talking about it.

Can't change my mind, these two should be together.

Again, I am sorry for the bad GIF quality. I tried Lol.

[sporksaber]

I really like the idea of korra running away earlier than she does in the show, but first, I want to talk about how fucked her situation kinda is.

[I'm going only off season 1, I don't like 3 or 4. Just wasnt my thing. I am going to bring up the red lotus stuff tho]

First off, when the white lotus show up to see if she's the avatar they are 100% looking down on her family. They seemed like they disliked being in the southern water tribe at all, and like they were completely dismissive of the idea that the avatar would be there.

Korra is then taken from her parents and confined in a fortress far away from away of the villages (as you can see when she goes on the run with nala and how far away the mountains are) [headcannons further down]. She can only leave with permission and there isn't anywhere for her to go if she wanted to leave.

They bring in bending masters to teach her, and talk up the importance of who she is. She has to stay because it's her duty, just as it's their duty to protect her. She is the avatar, that's her entire being.

Headcanon time

1. The fortress would've taken time to construct, but not long enough that korra could of moved there for training once she got older. This is proven bc the first kidnapping attempt by the red lotus happened 13 years before the events of book 3, so korra would still be 4. So either A) they forced her to go as soon as it was constructed, or B) they convinced Korra it was her duty (it's very easy to manipulate an excited 4 year old) and had her convince her parents to let her go.

2. The white lotus were always very cold to korra. She was a very energetic kid who did not match who they wanted to be and they hated it. And, much like teachers who hated when students got perfect scores despite not paying attention in class, they weren't happy when she excelled at every bending test they threw her way.

3. Sokka and zuko hung around for awhile after she was first discovered and katara was called to be her teacher. Korra really liked them, but they were always kind of off around her. But following sokka's death shortly after the battle with the red lotus, Zuko no longer came by.

4. Katara was an amazing teacher. She had taught hundreds of students and knew just how to cater to Korea's needs. The red lotus didn't like how lenient she was. Eventually, to try and prove that katara was not teaching the right way, they told her to teach korra healing. They didnt think she'd be able to as she'd never shown any spiritual aptitude. But korra still excelled. After that, they decided she didnt need any further water bending training.

^everything above is I think two years old.

A note on number 3, this would've been when korra was 4, so she doesn't really remember it. Nor does she really remember anything before being discovered as the avatar.

I really do think a lot of korra's aggression can be explained by the white lotus basically trying to make her "learn her place" and making her training more and more forceful.

Also, I think korra should have been wierder. Besides maybe some guards, no one around her is her age and she's never had a friend before. Like, they really couldn't have even arranged for her to meet with her cousins? Just completely cut off her interaction with everyone but her teachers, I wouldn't be surprised if the guards weren't actually allowed to talk to her.

[monzamash]

just don’t understand why u keep saying you’ve gone off daniel because of ‘what he said/did earlier in the season’ yet ur perfectly happy to write for lando who also made questionable comments idk just feels hypocritical. what made landos comments ok but daniels so horrid lol it makes no sense 👍 if u want to be a daniel hater just come out and say it instead of being all coy about it and pretending like ur not being weird about it cause u say u won’t write for him and then u update ur layout and put up a picture of it lmao so which is it

i don’t know if this is the same anon that’s been sending me shit every second day for months about this - i’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt and say it’s not because of the way you’ve typed this out but the message is still the same and this is the last straw.

i don’t hate daniel. if you look at my last post i said that he’s a big part of why i fell in love with f1. he was also the reason i started this blog so just because i’m not writing for him now, doesn’t mean i hate him. it’s not as black and white for me as it seems to be for you.

writing doesn’t define my blog - its something i do when i feel like it and most of the time i’m either chatting with you guys on here or supporting other writers. it was a fun escape but lately it’s been the opposite of that.

people may not like this but in my opinion daniels comments were significantly more damaging than landos vague response to a question that nobody could factually corroborate. i don’t think i’m alone in thinking that. daniel straight up said the one thing i personally hate the most when someone’s defending an abuser which is, “well [insert name] has always been good to me so…” that’s what upset me the most and now i have no desire to write for him. that is simply how i feel and if you don’t agree/understand, it’s all good. try and find other blogs who do share your views. makes life a lot easier.

anyway, did daniels comments make me want to erase every trace of him from my blog? no but i made it clear that i wouldn’t be writing for him for the foreseeable future and if anything changed, i would give people the heads up. what i absolutely won’t be doing is caving in to bullies who hide behind a shadow on the fucking internet who say i that i should delete my blog and myself while i’m at it.

so the context of why i made a header with daniel in it was that i thought including him would allow people the chance to bounce if they don’t want to read any daniel fics or interact with a blog that had a lot of daniel content in the past - people hate him and have made sure to tell me how fucked i am to still have his fics in my masterlist. thats the sort of hate that really gets to me because i’m so proud of some of those fics and spent a lot of time on them. that’s one reason why I won’t ever delete them but it’s also because there are daniel fans out there who hopefully feel like they can still interact with me even if we don’t share the exact same opinion. i don’t want that to change.

another thing to note is that this header was up for like two seconds and the fact you saw it must mean you’re just stalking my page? are you checking in to call me out the second i do something wrong? and you think i’m weird? alright lol

lastly, saying i’m being coy and weird isn’t fair - i’ve been honest about where i stand and even when i’ve been unsure, i was still being upfront and owning the fact that i didn’t know what direction this blog would take after all that. so if what i’ve said in this post or in the past isn’t enough for you, then just leave please. literally leave me alone because i don’t want to do this anymore.

[midnightpillsnacking]

[Loulou*di S3V2 L 3-9] Hana-Doll 3rd Season THINK OF ME:ARK Translation

Translation below the cut. Google Drive link | Listen to the album on Spotify

Project Archive: L 3-9

Setsuna: Hey, what did the situation earlier mean? Do you know?

Rui: It’s nothing to concern yourself over.

Setsuna: I’m curious. After all–

Rui: That was just an impulse from the mention of Anthos*.

Setsuna: But…

Rui: Ageha speaks the truth. The flower is not much of an outside threat even during the window when it is at its most potent. Furthermore, internal wounds are barely noticeable when the situation is stable.

Setsuna: Internal…wounds?

Rui: Take care that you head off in the right direction. But that aside, the tea must have scalded you earlier on.

Setsuna: Not at all. Anyway, Mahiro–

Rui: That conversation ends here.

Setsuna: …

Rui: There’s no need for you to mention Yuuki Mahiro the next time you see Ageha.

Setsuna: Is it okay to break my promise with Ageha then?

Rui: Why did you even make such a promise with Ageha in the first place?

Setsuna: Hm? ‘Why’?

Rui: You’re not plotting something with Ageha, are you? As far as I know, you two had no interaction when we were at the training academy.

Setsuna: Are promises something you only make with people you’re close with?

Rui: Considering the risks, the question is why would you make a promise with someone you don’t know and what can you hope to gain from it? It’s beyond my comprehension.

Setsuna: Risk?

Rui: You let slip a job that has yet to be publicly announced. If anybody knew that word of it reached Ageha, you’ll be first one to be suspected by Anthos*. Are you okay being branded a traitor?

Setsuna: A traitor? Will Mahiro doubt me?

Rui: Likely.

Setsuna: I don’t want that.

Rui: That’s why I’m telling you to stop.

Setsuna: Okay, I understand. Thanks.

Rui: No need to thank me.

Setsuna: Huh?

Rui: ?

Setsuna: Just now, you looked just like him. Like Ryoga.

Rui: Kagekawa Ryoga?

Setsuna: Your aura is a little similar to his. When I talk about Mahiro to Ryoga, he makes a face like he’s kind of irritated.

Rui: I… don’t really care about Yuuki Mahiro, or Anthos* for that matter. Besides… (winces)

Setsuna: What’s the matter?

Rui: No, it’s nothing.

Setsuna: Hmm… Then, I’ll be going.

Rui: Setsuna.

Setsuna: I didn’t get burned so I’m okay. Bye-bye.

(Setsuna leaves.)

Rui: (winces in pain) What is this…? I don’t care about Anthos*, yet… why do I…

(Sound of a device being activated.)

Staff Member A: Medical team. What’s the–

Rui: Why was Yashiro Setsuna here?

Staff Member A: …The notification didn’t arrive on time. I apologize for the inconvenience.

Rui: Please answer my question. Why was he here?

Staff Member A: I apologize.

Rui: The application for all personnel to be vacated should have been accepted.

Staff Member A: You’re right.

Rui: Then why?

Staff Member A: I will explain shortly. Please calm down. He sometimes is allowed to be away from the facility as part of his retreat. His cultivation programme is different from the other members.

Rui: In other words, he’s more of a guest than we are.

Staff Member A: We made sure that his schedule wouldn’t allow him a chance to meet you. Apologies.

Rui: He mentioned that he came for maintenance that was scheduled earlier than usual. Does that have something to do with Anthos*’ appearance on Dream Drama Festa?

Staff Member A: Yes, we were doing some adjustments for his condition.

Rui: My understanding is that Dream Drama Festival is traditionally held every year outdoors. Am I correct?

Staff Member A: Yes.

Rui: For the sake of clarity, how about Loulou*di’s offer?

Staff Member A: For the time being, none has been made.

Rui: It would be better to have an understanding with a head start.

Staff Member A: We have not received any information in detail since yesterday.

Rui: Understood, doctor. Thank you.

Staff Member A: Don’t mention it. On another note, has he given you any trouble lately?

Rui: Not particularly.

Staff Member A: Then, has anything happened the past few days that has caused you distress?

Rui: Why do you ask?

Staff Member A: The medical research team has been carefully monitoring your brain waves. 

Rui: I think I heard about that being possible through the seed implanted in the body.

Staff Member A: Exactly. Over the past few days, your ERP[1] has been showing waveforms that have not been observed until now.

Rui: That’s…

Staff Member A: ERPs are thought to halve when facing inhibitory stimuli and secondary stimuli. The measurements recorded from the seed are still somewhat of a mystery to unpack, and with the possibility of noise…

Toki: (in the distance) Rui-san?

Rui: Toki-bou.

Toki: Oh, there you are. I thought I heard you talking. What are you doing here? …Who is this?

Rui: A member of the emergency staff from the medical facility.

Toki: Oh. One of those people butting in just because I’ve been complaining that I haven’t been feeling so good lately, right?

Staff Member A: As mentioned, you appear to be doing well.

Toki: But of course. Rui-san and Ageha-san are with me here, after all. Right, Rui-san?

Ageha: Just what are you all gathering here for?

Toki: Ageha-san!

Ageha: I leave for a minute and come back to this… (to the staff member) Hello, thank you for your hard work. 

Staff Member A: You look like you’re in high spirits as well.

Ageha: Thank you. It wouldn’t have been possible without such a serene environment.

Staff Member A: About… Yashiro Setsuna’s case–

Ageha: I don’t really understand what’s the point of this meeting, but could we just end the correspondence once and for all? Actually, this is the first time the three of us have seen each other today.

Toki: Exactly. We finally got to get together, so please don’t get in our way.

Ageha: I was just thinking about enjoying some precious time with this modest happy few.

Staff Member A: Heard loud and clear. We hope for nothing less than the best for both your body and mind.

Ageha: Thank you very much. Then, please excuse us. 

(Ageha ends the call.) 

Ageha: (sighs) Seriously. Those fools from the research facility… How many times must I tell them to stay out of this?

Toki: They don’t even respect Ageha-san’s instructions. They should all just be sacked.

Ageha: You’re being lively as always today.

Toki: Right? It’s ‘cuz I took a nap and rested up a lot!

Ageha: Mm. It’s good that you’re following instructions.

Toki: (giggles) 

Ageha: If you’re well enough for it, let’s go have a meal. Go and change.

Toki: Okay!

Ageha: Rui bought some souvenirs this afternoon. The sweet things are what you requested, right?

Toki: You managed to buy them? Yay! …Rui-san?

Ageha: Rui.

Rui: … Sorry, did you say something?

Toki: Ageha-san said you bought souvenirs for me.

Rui: Ah, of course. Cake, pudding and macaroons, right?

Toki: Eh? All of them?

Rui: I wasn’t sure which would be the best choice. I couldn’t pick just one. Do you not want all of them?

Toki: I’ll eat everything! Rui-san, I love you!

Ageha: Toki, before that, go freshen up.

Toki: Got it, I’ll go change my clothes now! (leaves)

Ageha: Let’s head back to the living room. 

Rui: Ageha.

Ageha: I don’t need an explanation or excuses. I knew you were sneaking behind my back and talking with the medical research team. For now, just focus on humoring Toki. I’ll take responsibility for–

Rui: Ageha!

Ageha: What’s with that face?

Rui: Right back at you. Why are you looking at me like that?

Ageha: Ah. Unfortunately, I can’t see my own face without a mirror.

Rui: Ageha would never turn around for me. He would move forward even if it meant trampling me. He wouldn’t normally cross paths with me, much less turn my way. Up until now, there wasn’t a single time when those things–

Ageha: You… Do you really want to be stepped on so badly? You truly are a freak. Listen well, Rui. This isn’t reality. It’s the inside of an ephemeral dream.

Rui: Ageha…

Ageha: It won’t be long before we will leave. We have to take up our responsibilities as Loulou*di. But now… in this moment, we’re inside a special dream. Peering from inside an isolated illusion. This is a nice, relaxing dream.

Rui: Stop it.

Ageha: Listening to the sound of the wind, feeling the ebbs and flows of an invisible stream… In the arts, such a serene feeling would be poured into music, written onto a music sheet with the heart still weighing heavy. If I think about all the smiles the sound I create will bring, I believe that even now, I will be able to leave behind my greatest song. There won’t be a second for–

Rui: Ageha!

Ageha: (sighs) Your wish will surely be granted soon. I will disgracefully flail and struggle to breathe, and then finally die. My body will cease as a beautiful corpse, mounted on a magnificent frame, and placed as a grave marker[2]. That’s what you want to see, isn’t it?

Rui: That’s…

Ageha: I will wait for that day. This must have been the path Chihiro sprinted on.

Toki: Ageha-san, Rui-san! Let’s have tea!

Ageha: Let’s go, Rui.

Translator’s Notes:

ERP likely refers to ’Event-related potential’.

Ageha’s word of this album is ‘bohyou (墓標, meaning gravestone)/bouhyou (妄評, meaning unfair criticism)’. Unfortunately I was unable to discern which is which between this drama track and the previous one where he mentions it again in his long monologue in the art museum. I don’t believe the context changes a lot but I thought it was important to highlight this recurring word used.

[conjured-osteon]

Hiatus

{-Kicks rocks an mumble grumbles- I SWEAR this account was fully intended to have more activity but I'll be going on a Hiatus till further notice. If curious, I've added more under the cut but to keep it short'n'simple; Rough start to the year that only continued hasn't helped my creativity an instead stressed me out. (Triggers in the Tags, just in case.)}

{Starting this explanation on a softer note, I find myself having a hard time focusing on my lovely characters an this blog. Not to say I'm intending to get rid of it! But when you get nervous trying to reach out to others or don't get responded to it can be a bit disheartening an I never know what to do as a plan B. (Plus I know we all have lives outside of this. I'm just an unfortunately nervous person an sometimes the Logical Thinking gets bopped by the What If's) But I also have Bouncing Interests so at times my drive will go from full throttle to Zero without any warning because something else has gripped me like a vice.

I have been desperately wanting to work on the blog but as mentioned above, lack of interaction kills the motivation an leaves it kinda stressful cause I dunno what I can do to do better, especially when not wanting to be a pester or bother anyone. Otherwise I HAVE met some wonderful people who are a delight to chat/plot with and I am so, so, so sorry I've been inactive the past month :'D I take responsibility for that radio silence of mine.

And onto rougher notes... New Years Eve I had to say goodbye to my childhood dog. She lived a good, long life an it's still upsetting not seeing her around after nearly 15 years. Holidays already grate me so the addition only made it worse and then some other details surrounding it just, made it especially bitter for me. I've suffered depressing/anxiety fueling dreams involving her almost every night since. Following as a few days ago; one of my cats passed away. Another example of old age but losing a pet never comes any easier over the years.

Around December is when my mental state really started taking a nosedive, one I thought was going to be a temporary thing seeing as I was working odd hours for events from my usual shifts, not resting or eating properly Truth be told I'm bad at that in general bUT, grieving over the approaching vet visit on top of other stressors that came during the Holiday season. A part of the mindset I was thinking it would pass was due to the fact I don't register things that have happened/are happening immediately, an so I just guessed I was having one of my delayed responses from other things and handling present stress... Cept, it continued on in waves for several weeks in comparison to a day or two. Aaaand earlier today while I was working, I got so stuck in my own head, so tightly wound up by meaningless thoughts, arguments with not purpose and physically over stimulated into self directed aggression by getting MF'in' hiccups that I ended up reaching out to a Cr!s!s Hotline when I found I couldn't even make myself contact friends/family. My strongest Rational and Logical Thought was I needed to talk to someone before my predicament made itself truly hazardous. Immediately after, I called my partner so he'd be aware. I'm doing better at the current moment, quite chilled out actually an I fully intend to bring this all up with my Therapist this week.

I hate worrying others and I falter to express what's going on due to the always hovering thought of I'm just looking for attention, or I'll be ruining another person's day because I'm being a child. Something I've struggled with for a long time that I'm hoping-- Trying, very hard to work through.

Soooo yeah- I guess this is me saying I need to step back for my mental health. I'm still so bummed out by having to do this but I really, really want this to be a fun space I can look forward too at the end of my day without my own nagging negativities getting in the way of it.

DMs will continue to be open but I'll be much more MIA from here than I was prior, this time with reason behind it.}

[john-barkston]

gonna talk about RWBY because its my blog and i can do what i want!!

LOL Anyway, ITS SUCH A SHAME THIS IS HAPPENING! (Like okay, take all of this with a grain of salt because it's rwby and literally every other media already does this, but rwby hasn't normal dialogue and interactions between the main 3 girls since V3 so V9 is refreshing and I am enjoying it- HOWEVER - the biggest issue is that this should have happened WAY earlier in the show! If you also like to torture yourself like i do, you have kept up with RWBY and understand that while this is a fun romp and episode 3 specifically had some fun and experimental scenes for the show, the tonal dissonance is deafening. We just watched the Main Protags lie to a man who had only good intentions, (the VERY thing they LITERALLY SAID OUT LOUD THEY WEREN'T GOING TO DO in the season before) which turned this man into a murderous dictator out of literally not where, which in turn gets TWO cities swallowed by water, and have those city's populaces possibly fall to their deaths because of the stupidest plan by the MCs which also gets ANOTHER MC killed because the writers have no idea what they're doing with this show (don't worry it doesn't matter she has died already and was brought back to life only to die ~for real~ this time so this was the least impactful death in a show ever). AND NOW They're in "wonderland purgatory" following the plot of the book to possibly get back home?? EVERY PROBLEM THAT HAS HAPPENED SINCE V7 IS LITERALLY and i mean LITERALLY the main characters' fault and were supposed to just be like "Oh yeah, love those silly girls who don't get any repercussions for their actions besides the main girl being #depressed because her friend that she spoke to three times died -AGAIN. I'm sure they'll cut back to whatever the fuck is happening in the real world BUT ALSO they might not! This team has proven time and time again that they're on to something good in this show then they FUMBLE IT MASSIVELY. I like RWBY. It's VERY BAD most of the time but loads of fun and enjoyable when they get things right. There's so much potential here but it seems like they just write as they go instead of having the plot all lined out and boy does it show. Anyway, looking forward to where this train wreck goes and also the " give Weiss 'angel' wings" shot was for me :)

[nothingneverforever]

Marcella (Season 2,2018) and Dead to Me (Season 1, 2019): The flipside of two sympathetic, explosively volatile women and what it means for me

Before Season 3 of Dead to Me was released earlier in November, I rewatched seasons 1 and 2 and saw a crucial parallel to another series I’ve rewatched multiple times over: Marcella (only seasons 1 and 2 because season 3 wasn’t real tbh). I’m not reviewing these shows today, especially not Dead to Me because I can imagine that everything good to be said about it is already out there, and Marcella, well, because season 3 kind of made me not want to talk about the show ever again. But there is a small connecting thread between the lead characters Jen (Dead to Me) and Marcella (Marcella) that I’d like to talk a little about, especially because of how it relates to me and my expressions of self. 

I believe one of the three people reading this blog has not seen these shows, so for some context, I looked for some description of these two characters where their anger or more socially unacceptable demeanors are described as their key traits: 

Dead to Me 

So, every aspect of the show is absolutely fucking phenomenal, but the writing and acting in particular are off-the-charts flawless. Christina Applegate and Linda Cardellini play Jen Harding and Judy Hale, an unlikely pair united by a web of tragedy and bad decisions made by good people. Free-spirited Judy befriends cynical Jen at a grief group after Jen’s husband is hit and killed in a hit-and-run accident, and chaos ensues.

[...]   I think the thing in Dead to Me I connect to more than anything else though, is Jen Harding’s unfettered rage. [...] She’s just generally over people’s bullshit and expresses it in ways most of us either can’t or won’t. I mean, at one point she literally bludgeons someone to death when he pushes her too far with his woman-hating bullshit. Is there a woman out there who hasn’t entertained this fantasy? Jen’s honest, naked fury is the reason I think so many have fallen in love with the show and with this character in particular.

https://www.scarymommy.com/jen-dead-to-me-unfiltered-rage-queen

Marcella 

DS Marcella Backland, played with coiled spring intensity by Anna Friel – isn’t the chirpiest of characters. And nor is she all that fun loving or easy going, either. In fact, it’s a small wonder anyone in her life likes her at all, really.

Actually, come to think of it… No one really does. Her soon-to-be ex-husband Jason has now moved out properly and is due to marry his new girlfriend. Her children seem to tolerate more than love her. And she still runs about her place of work, barking at colleagues, undermining her boss and harassing suspects. Even her on/off boyfriend, colleague Jamie Bamber, seems to have a few issues with her behaviour.

In a way, it’s kind of reassuring to see that Marcella the person is still just as thoroughly brusque, surly and uncivil as ever. Just as reassuring as it is to see that Marcella the TV programme is still just as thoroughly dark, distressing and downright depressing as ever.

https://www.deadgoodbooks.co.uk/seasons/marcella-series-2-review/

So it is precisely in how ‘unlikable’ Jen and Marcella are that they charm and engage, where it is a welcome experience to bask in the fantasy of uncouth (yet highly successful), seething (but understandably so), feminist women. Aside from how they are generally in their day-to-day interactions and in their perspectives on the happenings in their lives, I am speaking specifically about how this ‘anger’ (generalising here because I can’t be bothered to explain all the way this manifests or all the different undercurrents, all the layers of the submerged iceberg beneath this anger, so just imagine a very very very deep and complicated and moving and sad and hurt compounded anger) led these two characters to committing irreversibly tragic actions. Jen, in a fit of misdirected hurt/rage/annoyance kills her best friend’s ex-boyfriend (as bolded in the text above), and Marcella, whose anger mostly seems self-directed, smashes the head of her loving, warm (and handsome hehe) colleague who had moments before just stopped her from attempting suicide, chains him to a toilet stall, cuts all her hair off and slices through the sides of her mouth (think Joker-but cooler idk I’ve never seen Joker or Batman lol), before living under a bridge for weeks in the cold. (See pic below for the shocking, terrifying iconicity of Marcella’s self-harm.) While the manifestations of these unprocessed, unmanaged unhelpful emotions are different, both Jen and Marcella are clearly volatile, “unhinged” women. 

A few nights ago I was in the car giving my colleague a lift home after work, and it’s a long drive so we usually have good time to start and finish serious topics before she gets off, and this is a part of my week-day routines I have come to enjoy very much. So on this particular drive, my colleague gave a recent stressful experience in her life as an example of how anger does not sit well with her, both in her personal and professional selves, and how sadness is something she’d much rather languish in. And I commented that I am very much the opposite, not that I am avoidant of sadness, but rather anger feels comfortable and nature and very much like something core to who I am. I have thrown cups and bottles on the ground and my phone more times than I can remember, I have smushed my pen-tip into my diaries since I was a teenager causing ink to bleed out, and slamming doors is something so easy for me to resort to, any day any time. And I know that certain media makes it seem empowering for women, otherwise discouraged from expressing non-warm/loving emotions, to start showing these types of behaviours as a supposed reclamation of that which we have had to abstain from with much intentional restraint, but we know honestly that there are not healthy or respectful methods of coping / managing. 

Back to Jen and Marcella, being me watching these two beautiful, strong, epic, swaggilicious women behave in the ways they do without thinking twice.... of course that’s immediately inspiring and relatable, right? Because it’s something I can already see myself doing, see myself being if given free rein. But my post today, the important point that has been on my mind for months, is why this isn’t okay. Doing the work that I have done (just for 2+ years but hopefully many many many more to come!!) and also just generally maturing as a young adult has shown me that it’s not cool for anyone to cause distress in others through such expressions; it’s not cool to “lost control” (itself a myth mostly), and it’s not cool to ummmm murder haha or to attempt it... 

Which is precisely why Jen and Marcella had to go to such extreme lengths. Let’s imagine that these two women continued about with their lives as the cool, iconic, irreverent, highly intelligent, brave legends that they are, and express themselves with the rudeness/disrespect/”craziness” that they do, save for killing someone/attempting to kill others+themselves. If that was it, then it would really have been so, so so easy to continue to pedestalize them as the women most of us other women dream to be. It would be so easy to think hey I could be like that too, and in fact I should because I deserve to! And this is not wrong either. There are a million ways in which women can act that would likely benefit all of society, with such freedom of expression. But the peak of the mountain (murder, to generalize) should never be reached; that is not a height to be scaled and I think that’s why it was so important that it was.  Do you know what I mean? What I mean when I say the shocking brutalities* are necessary is that audiences needed to realise that there is always a flipside to being this ‘cool angry bih’. And sometimes that can include awful awful awful tragedies. Me most of all, I needed to realise it too. 

* - Dead to Me invested a lot into showing the hurt caused by Jen’s murderous action, where the shock and realisation of how immoral and unacceptable it was doesn’t come all at once, but slowly through the impact shown on many many lives. And ultimately we (and authorities) forgive her for it, but the weight is always known. 

I might come back and add on to this in a while, but it’s a Sunday night now and as always I’m anxious about starting the work week because more often than not it includes weights I am not prepared to carry. But I’d like to say most importantly more so than the non-revolutionary singular point I’ve made in the too-many words above, that I love love love love love both of these shows. Finishing season 3 of Dead to Me last week, I cried on the way back home a few days later suddenly thinking about how sad and vast and simple it was. 

Love you all! 

------------------------

Update:

Omg I just realised something hilarious hahahaha I was scrolling through my few-and-far-between old posts and saw that I had very roughly talked about Dead to Me in May 2021, and omg... I am part of the fucking problem guys!!! 

This is so funny omg.... ignore everything I said pls hahahahaha.... Killing an innocent man is not ok wtf!! Maya wake up!!!! 

Ok but saying “you can die” when someone asks you what they can do to help is still quite iconic ngl. 

[bahamutgames]

AFTERTHOUGHTS - ROUNDUP ROUND 14

August 2024

As I'm writing this. It's 12 AM on September 1st. So I think it's fair to assume I prooooobably won't be beating any other games in August unless I decide to bumrush something RIGHT NOW... But I don't wanna do that.

Usually when there's so few games for one of these posts, I'll save them and combine them with next month until I have a chunkier collection... But I don't wanna do that. Guys. This is the SpongeBob one. I'm finally gonna talk about SpongeBob.

Stardew Valley (February 26, 2016) - PC

OH MY GOD YOU GUYS IT'S STARDEW VALLEY! Yeah, farming games aren't usually my thing, but this one was a little different and required my attention for personal reasons. For starters, it's my mom's favorite video game of all time! She plays any farming game she can get her hands on, but this one is absolutely her #1. So I had to check it out for her. And also, because she loves it so much I took her to the Stardew Valley Festival of Seasons concert a month or so ago. I had only played a little bit of the game to get familiar with what music I could the day before the concert, but I enjoyed what I played and loved the music at the concert so much, I decided to go ahead and keep playing. Now, these games don't really "end" in a traditional sense. But I figured my goal for SV would be Grandpa's Review because my mom and people on reddit suggested it's the closest thing the game has to an ending.

And, ultimately, yeah I loved this game! Where to begin with the positives? I think it has some REALLY lovely sprites, the game never has a screen that doesn't look good (certain beds exempt). Environments look great, some scenes and areas are genuinely gorgeous like the jellyfish festival, I think a lot of the characters have really cute designs, and the whole game just feels nice to look at. Like I said earlier, the music is FANTASTIC! It's all very pretty and every season's music is wonderful to listen to. My favorite songs are probably from the mine though, they're all so somber but really nice. And my personal favorite song over all being 'A Golden Star is Born' from the Community Center quests. Speaking of the mines and community center, I actually think these things are what made this game so approachable for me. Farming games are great and cute, but I've never made this much progress in any of them (the closest being A Wonderful Life on GC maybe.) But I think having some surprisingly in depth combat with multiple weapon classes, equipment, and fucking parrying?? In the farming game??? Okay... And also having something of a story mode with rebuilding the community center and trying to find the perfect ingredients for each bundle really helped me press along in the game rather than getting stuck. Like, it gave me a goal to work towards whereas most farming games are truly endless. If that makes sense? I'm also shocked by the sheer amount of content in this game, I barely scratched the surface of what there is to do over the 2 years I played it. The characters are all cute (for the most part I don't fw Shane), I love seasonal cycles, I love all the hidden easter eggs and stuff, I love Korbus, I loved the cute festivals, I loved Leah my hot artist wife. There's a lot to love in this game.

But like every game it isn't perfect. Just the way it is. And I have 2 specific issues with this game that come down to how you interact with NPCs. The first issue: Your Dog. Why can't I do ANYTHING with this damn dog? I can pet it, and sometimes he gives me things. But I can't play fetch, or take it for a walk, or even buy it presents? IT'S MY DOG!! I think even potentially having heart events as you become better friends with your pet could be super cute. Though I guess they don't do this because there's a lot of pet variety. The second issue: Your Partner. I've seen other people complain about this and I TOTALLY agree. Your partner just doesn't do enough. When you ask them out or propose there's basically no fanfare (maybe that's how it is irl too for all I know lmao) And once you're married, they are just GONE. They don't have a daily schedule anymore, you very rarely see them working, and there isn't much you can do together. Sometimes they make you coffee or feed the animals but it's just so sad to me! I think they should have some sort of daily schedule that just incorporates being at your house MORE rather than doing nothing. Maybe having more dates would be nice after you're married? Maybe having you two go to the festivals TOGETHER??? Mayhaps? Idk I just do kind of feel like marrying Leah ruined her life lmao. I probably would've changed her story specifically so that she still occasionally goes to her house to use it as an art studio for work.

But that's pretty much all I have for Stardew. Yeah, I get it now. This game is adorable. And I will certainly come back to continue playing it eventually (there's still ONE LAST community bundle left to do). But for right now, I'm happy to call it here. If you're interested you can see my farm here! And if you're curious, I finished the game with 4 candles on Grandpa's Shrine! Neat!

Spongebob Squarepants: Battle for Bikini Bottom (October 29, 2003) - Gamecube

GUYS CAN WE TALK ABOUT SPONGEBOB I'VE BEEN DYING TO TALK TO YOU ALL ABOUT SPONGEBOB!! OKAY HERE WE GO:

So, recently I said to myself "man it's been a while since I've watched the Spongebob movie." That was a dangerous start to a larger rabbit hole. For context, I ADORE that movie. And even though I like Spongebob, I wouldn't consider myself to be a huge fan of it or anything. But then I thought "well, why not watch Season 1-3 all the way for the first time so I can watch the movie as a finale?" Which lead to "man it's been a while since I played the Movie game. I loved that as a kid. Which led to "holy shit don't I own Battle for Bikini Bottom on gamecube? Why haven't I played that yet?" And... well, now I've done it all, boys. I'm a regular spongebob expert. And you're gonna read my thoughts! Basically the way I consumed it was SpongeBob seasons 1-3 > Battle for Bikini Bottom > SpongeBob Movie > Movie Game. But I'll start with the game afterthoughts, then I'll treat you all to a rare afterthoughts about a show, rather than a video game.

So, Battle for Bikini Bottom. I know this is the one that EVERYONE loves... And honestly, yeah I love it too lol. I think it's a SUPER cute game that captures the chaotic energy and feel of the show INCREDIBLY well. The original plot is really cute and absolutely feels like a special they would've made, and I'm glad they bothered making an original plot at all because they easily could've just made it... idk, nothing? And even for a bit of a SpongeBob newbie like me, the novelty of actually getting to run around all the locations is not lost on me. Like actually seeing stores from Spongebob in downtown, or even visiting stuff from one episode like Rock Bottom (even though I thought the level sucks imo, I just liked that episode a lot lol). And seeing them replicate gags from the show genuinely got a lot of laughs out of me. Like a bridge falling from the plane, or the bus coming out when you go to the vending machine. It's cute and is clearly filled to the BRIM with love for the show.

And the gameplay is just fun, simple platformer goodness! I liked having 3 playable characters with their own unique abilities, though I do wish Sandy could've been fleshed out more. It's got nice collectathon energy, the visuals are bright and colorful, and the soundtrack is surprisingly killer. Particularly the main theme to the hub world has been stuck in my head since beating it and the Poseidome theme rules. Probably the best aspect of this game though to me is the boss battles. They're all great (except maybe having to hit robot plankton with the homing bubble, he's SO FUCKING TINY STOP MOVING-) But seriously I think the way they handle the bosses are great and having the talking fish commentate over the bosses RULES! And like, was actually a little insightful. I remember getting hit trying to deal damage to the first boss and when the fish was like "I don't think Spongebob will be winning that way" I immediately knew I was doing it wrong. Idk, it's small and maybe would be annoying in other games but it works here.

So yeah they game is lovely and filled with that wonderful Spongebob charm. But it's not perfect. Particularly they couldn't get all the voices, which wouldn't be the end of the world if the replacement voices weren't insanely off lmao. Mermaid Man in particular is just nuts. Some of the levels aren't that amazing either. Like the Kelp Forest is REALLY dark and hard to see. Rock Bottom was INSANELY confusing and I'm still not sure how to navigate most of it. And the audio mixing in this game could be DEMENTED! Idk how to show it to you but if you ever get near a waterfall in this game... Good lord. The sound of that waterfall will be SO LOUD and completely drown out all other noise. It's filled with weird super loud ambient noises like this. And while I think Spongebob's health being underwear is funny, idk why health is even in this game because getting hit by an enemy once just sends you FLYING. A single hit of damage is basically a guaranteed death because you'll be knocked back so insanely far and fast that you almost always fall off the stage. It's nuts. The game also just isn't super polished in every area, and I think the sequel really improves on some aspects like how special moves are done as well as how it handles its generic collectibles. But, like, this game was so cute and so well done and so funny. I couldn't stay mad at it. What a surprise treat this was!

The Spongebob Squarepants Movie (October 27, 2004) - Xbox

But, the whole time I was playing BfBB I kept thinking "oh man this gets recycled in the movie game and it's SO much better there." I played this one as a little kid and I ADORED IT!! Just like I adore the actual movie. So after rewatching it, I was stoked to come back and play my old childhood copy of it again :)

And boy howdy was I wrong, this game is not as good as Battle for Bikini Bottom. Yes, it certainly does do the things I said earlier better. I like that it has RPG elements where you can actually upgrade special moves and health, that RULES. And I think making the generic collectibles work like EXP rather than currency for more of the main collectibles is cooler. But... idk man, this one is rough.

So, this game was made in like a year. And it shows. Instead of the charming in engine cutscenes from the first game, this instead uses stills from the movie where the narrator tells you what happened over it. These are worse than you remember. By the time you reach the ending, they full on don't even have screenshots from the movie and have to make their own using stock assets and what seems to be drawings done in paint? Take a look, it's bizarre.

Particularly that last one. Notice the stray pixels inside Spongebob's eyelashes. Is that where the fill tool failed to color in the edges? Or how about the miscolor around SpongeBob's mouth. It's INSANE this is in the final game. Again though, this game was made in a year. This is almost certainly Nickelodeon's fault for not giving them access to the movie for... some odd reason.

And it's not just this, cutscenes that do use animated models tend to just have them idling while occasionally moving to talk. I don't think Mindy even has a full model cause she's only ever seen over her magic mirror. The game is also full of a lot of repeated missions, like enemy fights or platform challenges or ring challenge and time challenges. And the first game had this too, but it had a LOT more missions to do so you could better pick and choose your battles. But here you need basically every goofy goober token. Which forces you to do a lot of the game's worst levels.

There's other oddities too, like Dennis using a seemingly scrapped design during his rematch. Hasslehoff obviously not being able to return for it. But let's move onto some of its positives because no game is truly awful.

Aside from the Patty Wagon stages, the actual levels themselves are good. The platforming levels are a lot of fun, the tub slide levels are okay, and the bosses are generally all good and creative I'd say. I think there's also some other polish made over the first game like tons of hidden extras like concept art or alt costumes. I also think Goofy Goober Tokens are a cleaner mcguffin than golden spatulas if that makes any sense at all. It's improved visuals and they actually got back EVERY voice actor. Including Mindy. Which doesn't mean much cause most of the cast never talks in this game. But it's cool they pulled it off! Music is fantastic, the final boss theme is genuinely such a banger. The desert theme rules. This games OST still really holds up and I may prefer it over BfBB still honestly. I also think the enemies are a little less annoying than BfBB.

Yeah it's odd. I don't think it's a TERRIBLE game. But man I'm shocked I finished it as a kid. It's clearly rushed and didn't get the time that BfBB did. And ultimately I think being more polished can't save it from the slideshow cutscenes and the annoying amounts of grinding you have to do to beat it.

Spongebob Squarepants (May 1, 1999)

Okay, so that's the games. But what are my thoughts on the show? I've seen some episodes of it as a kid. I had some VHS tapes I believe and we would rent episodes from the Library. But I didn't have cable so most of these episodes I hadn't seen before. And certainly not all at once like this. Which was very interesting to finally do. Again, I watched the first 3 seasons and then the Movie.

Thoughts? Yeah SpongeBob is a funny as fuck show! I think it has a great premise that's actually very unique. Taking place completely underwater with aquatic characters. The cast is all great, I love Spongebob and sometimes I really fuck with Patrick. Sandy is great, and Plankton + Karen may be some of the best characters but they're not in it enough, especially Karen. And personally I kind of don't fuck with Squidward (he's responsible for his own problems 99% of the time don't let revisionists tell you it's spongebob and patrick fucking with him he's not relateable) and Mr. Krabs is basically a straight up villain. They're still funny. And it also has some nice visuals, the animation is great and I particularly think the skylines with the flowers are super cute. And they do a lot of odd things I wasn't expecting like a TON of live action and really surreal junk.

Actually, one of the most surprising parts of the show to me is how WEIRD it is. It's a BIZARRE series. With lots of weird closeups, some INSANELY weird visuals and surreal(?) jokes. To a true SpongeBob fan that's probably a really weird thing to notice but. Idk I just wasn't expecting it to be so random. But it does it well. Like the seahorse episode where randomly for one shot SpongeBob has a mustache and it's never addressed. And the fucking Gorilla. You know the one.

But my favorite kinds of jokes from the series, with pretty much no contest. Is when SpongeBob gets mad at people. When he snaps it creates the best scenes in the series. Like him getting mad at Squidward when he's jobless, or when he cusses out Mr. Krabs when he's crushing on Ms. Puff, or the absolute best and probably my favorite scene in the whole series: LISTEN HERE YOU CRUSTACEOUS CHEAPSKATE!! SQUIDWARDS BEEN LIVING AT MY HOUSE- ect ect. It's so good. And they save it, they don't use it often so when it happens it's out of nowhere and so funny. The show is just so funny and there's very few moments where it's boring or not hitting.

But yeah it's certainly not perfect. I can't remember exact moments but there are some jokes that feel oddly mean spirited or even inappropriate like a few suicide jokes. And sometimes the characters can be so stupid it's nerve-wracking. But it's a kids cartoon that's par for the course lol.

---

Then there's the movie. This is a whole separate beast. The finale to the series (or at least the first 3 seasons.) And it's pretty much the perfect movie. It keeps all the same funny and chaotic energy. But it's somehow not too over the top, like it's still respectful for the big screen while still being insane. And I of course love stories with big stakes in universes you wouldn't expect and this absolutely delivers. I love Plankton being an ACTUAL threat, and Karen gets some nice jokes here too. I love SpongeBob and Patrick being heroes and actually dealing with some crazy threats. Dennis is cool. The whole premise with the crown and Plan Z is great. And even though the movie is constantly jumping between multiple stories it doesn't feel scattered or weird or poorly paced. It's really well done. And I LOVE that they do some of the different animation styles by actually going to live action places towards the end and even fighting a live action enemy. And the whole scene with the tear of the goofy goober is so sad and so well done. And I love SpongeBob having a real adult problem where he wants to be manager and no one takes him seriously.

But in particular the ending of this movie is so special. SpongeBob realizing that being a kid is fantastic and him gaining insane power from it is so goofy and him becoming a guitar wielding wizard who uses his music to free everyone is SO RANDOM AND CHAOTIC AND SO SPONGEBOB!! And the whole Goofy Goober rock scene just absolutely rules and the speech before hand makes me so emotional. I fucking love this scene it's one of my favorite "final battles" in a movie I guess you could call it. Please watch it if you haven't seen it in a while. It's better than you remember.

And having SpongeBob prove himself and become manager, it's basically the perfect ending. I love it. The series is good, but this movie is perfect. It's the perfect finale. And it's still my favorite SpongeBob thing in the series even now.

But yeah, that's my thoughts on SpongeBob. I honestly never considered that I'd do something like this so this was a real surprise and treat for me. But I loved doing it. SpongeBob is really good and I basically haven't stopped thinking about it. Not helped by the fact it turned out to be the series 25th anniversary this year, so I cannot escape the series at the moment. Idk. SpongeBob was good. I enjoyed this. But I don't think I'll be doing this for any other shows, at least not any time soon. It was all just a delightful coincidence that I had access to all this media without even needing to pirate it all at the same time. But again, I'm glad it happened. Happy Birthday SpongeBob!!

[salesflying]

THINGS NOT TO SAY WHEN YOU QUIT A JOB

The saying “The Only Constant Thing is Change” also implies on your professional life. The saddest part of life is that when it is changed it doesn’t prompt you with a message like “Do you want to save changes”? It would have been so convenient! Right?

Unfortunately, that’s only in fantasy and in practical life you need to be smart, clever and honest with whatever you do and whoever you deal. You can’t keep a temporary relation with people you spend your whole active day with. If you haven’t guessed it I am talking about people from your workplace. I started this topic with the word “Change” as you change your job due to several reasons but can’t undo the changes you have done in the past. So you need to maintain a congenial relationship with the company and the management even if you are quitting the job.

Embrace change in your professional journey with wisdom and grace.As a seasoned Business Consultant, I understand the intricacies of navigating transitions. Learn the art of leaving your job on a positive note by avoiding common pitfalls.

Whenever you decide to quit a job, never behave like you getting freedom from a place you never going to return. Your previous company is like an attachment to your life. It will always show-up on your resume and your skills and capabilities will get verified only through your previous companies for any kind of job you are looking for. So whenever you are quitting the current position, choose your words wisely.

So, let’s make a checklist on ‘THINGS NOT TO SAY WHEN YOU QUIT A JOB’

This is my last day

Remember, when you play a game for days n days on your gaming device but suddenly quit it due to boredom. That thing doesn’t work in professionalism. You need to be fair and give your company a suitable time to find a replacement for you so the company’s routine is not disturbed and everybody is happy. Instead, interact more with your management and colleagues leaving the company on a good note.

The Management here is bad

This is a negative statement and it directly puts you and your company in a bad spot as management is like two sides of a coin. It co-relates on the manager-employee relationship.

I was never appreciated

You were getting a paycheck and that was your appreciation. If only you were getting de-motivated by your boss then that’s a different issue but if you were looking for special treatment like announcing and praising you in front of the team or pats on your back, then you should have discussed that earlier. Appreciation is not necessary to be mentioned when you present, always keep that in mind

The thing wrong with this profile is

Hold your horses and stop acting like a donkey! You are quitting the job but that doesn’t certify you to become a designation critic or a free advisor. Just thank your boss for the opportunity he/she gave you and found you eligible for the post

This company is going nowhere

This and relevant statements like these are actually classified as ‘nasty’. It is like you had a great time on the ship and now running away when it began to sink. Just have a contrast approach and wish all the success to the company in the future. This makes a good lasting impression instead of a frown on the face of your employer whenever your name is mentioned after you have gone.

To be honest I know that every employee who leaves the company gets diplomatic and becomes ‘politically correct’ about their answers. You just need to remember ‘Never say Never’ as you don’t know at which point of your life you need your company to be referenced or you may also need to join it again so always be good enough and don’t burn the bridges.

As a commitment to your success, I offer free consulting services to guide you through this pivotal phase. Whether it’s crafting the perfect resignation message or strategizing your next career move, I’m here to assist you. Embrace change with confidence, maintain fruitful relationships, and step into the future with the assurance that every move counts. Your career is a canvas – let’s paint a picture of success together.”

[indigodatum]

More Evidence!

As we got Orange back into the mix a few episodes ago I had a theory, and every time they're around I get more convinced that I am absolutely right.

Orange is not in Deerland after the events of Season 1.

From Season 2 Episode 4 as they talk with Mrs. Frye she's clearly discussing Larks and Birdsong and their response is that it sounds bizarre. From the beginning of Season 1 Larks seemed to be a known quantity to all of the Department. The fact that they have no idea what any of the implications of this could be says to me they're in a much earlier point in time

Now as we see them again they mention that they're now sure that there's Department business in Deerland. Sure everything that we've seen of them suggests that they operate on instinct and intuition, but that doesn't sound like they know anything about a Jasmine Control to know she's the same as the missing girl they're pursuing.

In new episode there's a reference to the movements of the thin-head or earworm as looking odd "in the twin moons' light".

Then, after running into the earworm, they want a coffee, an espresso, but cold and nicotine and are unfamiliar with the fact that iced coffees are totally a thing and vapes are a bit of an alien concept to them and Lena, our waitress, still labors under the belief that she can use vapes to actually quit nicotine, all of which tracks with my memories of about a decade ago.

Everything about this episode really seems to confirm that idea concretely, but I bring it up because my theorizing up there is nothing but a foundation for my real speculation. Olivia had always been a part of this group going out to the State Park in Scarlet's memory.

Back in Season 1 when Scarlet first mentioned that she had some kind of history with variance she brings up that she was out with "A close friend, Darryl, and... someone else." First time I heard it I thought she was just unsure of how to describe the 4th member of the party, but the second time I think I thought that she was trying to hide their identity. But after we got into Season 2 I started a relisten, and I don't think that she properly remembered who was out there with her.

Then when Jasmine went on her first Jaunt she went into Scarlet's memory and she *knew* that she saw Scarlet despite never having met her, and then the second person she later confirmed was Violet, then she was convinced that Ivory Torment, the doppleganger, had followed her into the narrative pause of the Jaunt because someone with her face stepped out of the Jeep. We're told this is all impossible, but this is a job where everyone regularly interacts with fictional and semifictional entities. With all else occurring this slipped through the cracks of discussion. (Besides, there was flirting to be done)

When we get Scarlet's view of sitting in this memory, she says it feel like she'd always been friends with Jasmine. Now given the way nostalgia plays high in the powers and effect of Birdsong and the Larks I thought it was just how everything plays with your memory, but what if she's just accessing memories that'd been fucked with before pushing them aside.

As Jasmine got trapped and we ended Season 1 I wondered how she was going to act in the past now, but we discovered she's actually in a memory, but not like on a jaunt where she's watching from afar and not interacting. With that revelation I started racing my mind to figure out how the memory, the dream, was going to explain her introduction to this group

Later, again in Estranged from Grace, when talking with the garage band the response is not to say that she's so much older, a "decrepit twenty something" in the words of Nadia. They discuss how she was a prep and "in different social circles". This implies that she's somehow the same rough age cohort as the kids. Same as Nadia and Alex.

Almost identically, Lena has her own thoughts about her. Lena's been putting together the breadcrumbs of variance that get things grabbed out at the State Park. She notes that the "gay girl" was one who went totally missing. So did the teen from Guatemala, but I don't think we've run into them yet.

I think all of this means we'll get to the end of the season where our Trio and Orange will meet up. Jasmine/Olivia will find a way to conceal the exact nature of how much interaction Alex and Nadia had with all of it, and so that only she gets the full mind wipe, while Alexa and Nadia are just made to forget how they knew her because she works out that's how it always had happened. Orange clearly didn't report much of it, though, but Orange doesn't seem one who loves paperwork and reporting. We know this because Olivia is grabbed as an example of someone with zero exposure to Variance. Which, considering both how Scarlet mentioned that queerness is its own form of Variance and Jasmine's line, "She's bi, I'm bi, everyone is bi!", suggests that even more of her life has been concealed from Yellow's plan. The question is whether Orange intended on messing with the plan or if the universe just enjoys messing with her.