#like I know it's a joke I just don't care for it
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astonmartinii · 2 days ago
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put it all on red (bull) | max verstappen social media au
pairing: max verstappen x fem russell reader
her brother won the race? does she know? does she care?
MASTERLIST | TIP JAR
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yourusername
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liked by alexalbon, georgerussell63 and 204,300 others
tagged: maxverstappen1
yourusername: VIVA LAS VEGAS
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user3: this is fucking hilarious
user4: her whole ass brother won the actual race and there's not a peep of him on the post
user5: i mean her boyfriend did win the championship...
yourusername: exactlyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy i mean my instagram is for pretty girls only
user6: do not erase george's beauty
yourusername: nothing to erase girlypop - FUGLY!
user7: the way the guys are in the media pen and can't see that y/n is coming for their necks in instagram comments
user8: i fear she's already started drinking...
user9: in the back of the sky broadcast she hands max a drink and i'm starting to suspect that it was not water or red bull
user10: LMAO HELMUT TOOK A SIP AND LIKE NEARLY FELL OVER
yourusername: i've never claimed to be good at mixing drinks
maxverstappen1: WHERE WAS THE TONIC ???
yourusername: i don't believe in tonic 💔
maxverstappen1: YOU GAVE ME STRAIGHT GIN?
yourusername: straight 🤣
maxverstappen1: Y/N THAT'S ATTEMPTED MURDER ON HELMUT ???
yourusername: free me i did nothing wrong !!!
user11: these people kill me
user12: sign of a healthy relationship is making gay allegations about each other
yourusername: ALLEGATIONS ???
yourusername: george is lucky that he was the first russell carmen met ...
georgerussell63: RIGHT, I HAVE HAD ENOUGH
georgerussell63: thank you for the congratulations but STOP flirting with MY girlfriend
yourusername: congratulations??? for what?
georgerussell63: WINNING THE RACE?
yourusername: boring!
georgerussell63: you are so lucky we're family because you are a few cards short of a deck
yourusername: CARDS? that reminds me ... time to gamble!
maxverstappen1
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liked by oscarpiastri, charles_leclerc and 1,342,988 others
tagged: yourusername
maxverstappen1: winning without the fastest car isn't for everyone
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user13: this caption has y/n russell written all over it
yukitsunoda0511: i sat here and watched them giggle to themselves for a good five minutes while posting this
user14: tell max to post more pictures like the second one
yukitsunoda0511: they are not safe for innocent eyes and they are not taken with a locked door :/
user15: why are you there ???
yukitsunoda0511: they're very generous when they're drunk !
user16: so real
yukitsunoda0511: it's also not just me :(
user17: just how many people are using the bar tab?
liamlawson30: me!
oscarpiastri: me!
charles_leclerc: me!
landonorris: me!
pierregasly: me!
alexalbon: me!
yourusername: broke bitches
carlossainz55: you do not have a job?
yourusername: gambling and being pretty is more of a job that what you will have next season 🤨
carlossainz55: has anyone ever told you you're a really mean drunk
yourusername: just george about a billion times, you get used to it (we just don't invite you out)
user18: she is just dragging anyone now
user19: hold on that is her boyfriend's work boyfriend's enemy
user20: girl is 90% of lestappen twitter's source and you think she's not gonna have a problem with sainz???
yourusername: you're so sexy i actually can't even function
maxverstappen1: gotta put the trophy in trophy husband somehow
yourusername: jokes aside i am super duper proud of you, this year has been insane and you've proven that you are the bestest eva
maxverstappen1: couldn't have done it without my fave cheerleader
yourusername: i'll wear the uniform and everything ....
schecoperez: STOP
georgerussell63: still no congratulations? i know you won the title or whatever but we're going to be brothers soon SHOW SOME RESPECT
yourusername: literally suck his dick
yourusername: wait no
yourusername: suck my dick
yourusername: WAIT NO
yourusername: choke ❤️
georgerussell63: i have no words at this point
maxverstappen1: so romantic hehehehe
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yourusername: put it all on on red (bull)
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user22: ma'am why is there a cat?
user23: i think we already know the answer
user24: oh i know the answer i just wanna know the batshit explanation
georgerussell63: exsqueeze me ???
yourusername: don't speak like that about your nephew ??
georgerussell63: tell me you're not keeping it??
maxverstappen1: IT? HE JUST LEAPFROGGED YOU IN OUR WILL
georgerussell63: 1. you have a joint will ??? 2. why am i on it ??? 3. what is a cat doing with a monaco penthouse ???
maxverstappen1: i thought you could use the money ? i know toto ain't paying you what he promised me
yourusername: george your weird sugar daddy is more broke than you think sorry xx
georgerussell63: once again, what is stopping me taking the monaco house from a literal cat ?
yourusername: caesar will be very aware of his rights string bean - just because you talk in an uppity accent doesn't mean you actually know anything
georgerussell63: i cannot tell who corrupted who but i am sick of being your victim :(
user25: yes as fun as watching them dog george is i do want to know caesar's origin story
user26: i have a very bad feeling i know where he got his name
alexalbon: HE'S NOT NAMED AFTER THE CASINO IS HE?
yourusername: ding ding ding we have a winner, always knew you were the smarter half of galex
maxverstappen1: your gambling is getting out of hand
yourusername: did i or did i not win us a cat ?
maxverstappen1: AND £250,000 ???
yourusername: didn't want to promote gambling too much
yourusername: KIDS DO NOT GAMBLE IT IS DUMB
yourusername: look at me i literally have a child now ???
user27: we have lost the original plot of the movie
user28: you must be new, we stopped trying to make sense of these two years ago
lewishamilton: i can assure you it does not get any easier when you know them personally
yourusername: we aim to be sexy and mysterious
lewishamilton: that's strange because you guys dance like little boys and overshare at any given opportunity
maxverstappen1: guilty !
georgerussell63
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liked by alexalbon, landonorris and 873,409 others
tagged: lewishamilton, yourusername & maxverstappen1
georgerussell63: i won the las vegas grand prix and all i got was this lousy cat
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user29: i am sensing a y/n and max meltdown incoming
user30: maybe they're too hungover to argue?
yourusername: NEVER
maxverstappen1: LOUSY CAT? FIRST OF ALL HE'S NOT YOURS SO KEEP HIS NAME OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND ALSO I WILL KILL YOU WITH A GUN
georgerussell63: excuse me?
yourusername: do NOT threaten my boyfriend !!!!!!!!
georgerussell63: do you have selective sight or something?
yourusername: no i just like him more than i like you
georgerussell63: you only met him because of me?
maxverstappen1: i have faith we would've found each other regardless we have a SOUL TIE
yourusername: EXACTLY
georgerussell63: i give up.
yourusername: this is exactly why you don't have a championship ... no drive (pun intended)
georgerussell63: NOW THAT'S IT
maxverstappen1: are you threatening my girlfriend?
georgerussell63: OMG LEAVE ME ALONE
user31: their commitment to never letting george have a day of peace is really quite charming
user32: they're going to give him grey hairs before he even turns 27
alexalbon: i gotta say georgie, i'm not with you on this one - caesar is THE dude
georgerussell63: are all my eggs falling out of the basket at once?
maxverstappen1: that's called karma for calling caesar 'it' and a lousy cat
georgerussell63: i can't lie i am missing your honeymoon phase you guys were a lot nicer
yourusername: we never left the honeymoon phase we just like annoying all of you
maxverstappen1: makes you people leave us alone :3
landonorris: you don't have to be mean to do that
yourusername: YOU JUST GOT OFF OF THIN ICE NORRIS WATCH YOUR STEP
user33: they can make excuses all these want but they just like annoying everyone else
user34: i mean based on their vegas shenanigans i think they would be super fun to be around
yourusername: oscar literally came to stay while he 'looked for a flat' in monaco and hasn't left... it's been three months. face it we're a HOOT
oscarpiastri: they are fun! the secret is to not be annoying sorry george!
maxverstappen1: they grow up so fast :')
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maxverstappen1
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maxverstappen1: took a gamble when i went for the lanky posh dude's sister and i can now say it was definitely worth it
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user37: bro says snug as a bug in a rug once and now he's labelled as posh HE'S FROM NORFOLK
user38: it's also the way that y/n never gets the posh allegations
georgerussell63: it's because she's scruffy as fuck x
maxverstappen1: literally outside your house with a knife, keep talking
georgerussell63: i'm a grown man, max, you don't scare me
maxverstappen1: so i'm free to do a little gardening while you hide inside?
georgerussell63: you wouldn't...
yourusername: GO FOR THE PEONIES MAX
georgerussell63: NOT THE PEONIES I BEG HAVE MERCY
user39: so i'm supposed to read all of this shit and take them seriously when they get in the car
user40: it's part of the charm i think
user41: it's all fun and games until you remember they are full grown adults who can vote who are arguing over flowers
yourusername: i'd go through the strenuous task of growing up with george thousands more times just to be with you
maxverstappen1: i've been in love with you since i was 14, there has never been anyone else for me and there will never be anyone else for me
yourusername: ugh why didn't we just get married in vegas ?
maxverstappen1: because even though i did just harm his flowers, i do want to marry you in front of our families
yourusername: i guess you're right
georgerussell63: you know what? based on how you usually talk to me... i'm touched
yourusername: if i'm feeling generous i'll even let you do the seating chart
georgerussell63: I LOVE YOU BEST SISTER EVER
user42: only a declaration of love between max and y/n could end with george proclaiming his love for charts
user43: how does one procure an invite to this wedding ...
yourusername: be cunty
yourusername: @zakbrownceo YOU'RE BARRED
yourusername
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tagged: maxverstappen1
yourusername: i'm the sibling who can't drive and yet i'm the one with four championship trophies in their house... george, step your pussy up x
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user44: omg queen who can't drive, she's such representation
yourusername: george says i'm so mean all the time but really i'm generous, i clearly gave him all the driving genes
user45: have you even tried driving?
yourusername: i went on max's sim once and got motion sickness and i'm also with the best driver in the world and siblings with an okay one - i'm surviving
alexalbon: he's already texted me about your language on this post
yourusername: just because he's a boomer in a string bean's body does not mean i must censor myself - he should know what stepping his pussy up means by now
georgerussell63: i will not be stepping on any pussy, i respect both felines and women
maxverstappen1: you called caesar 'it' so PLEASE
georgerussell63: i respect women?
maxverstappen1: you called y/n scruffy?
georgerussell63: that's y/n it doesn't count
maxverstappen1: that's not very feminist of you george. i am disappointed
yourusername: i agree, i really think the GDPA should reconsider the type of person they're letting run it
georgerussell63: huh?
yourusername: not once have i been invited to a grid meal ....
georgerussell63: well you're not on the grid that's why
yourusername: FEMALE EXCLUSION
maxverstappen1: you know we have attachment issues, you're so heartless george
georgerussell63: what is going on ???
yourusername: you CLEARLY don't care about me
maxverstappen1: and you CLEARLY don't care about the wellbeing of the grid
georgerussell63: I'M SORRY???
user46: george is unbelievably easy to rattle
user47: it must be so fun
yourusername: oh believe me, we have way too much fun
maxverstappen1: we once convinced him that it was a social faux pas to shake hands in japan lol
georgerussell63: IS THAT WHY MERCEDES WERE TOLD THAT EVERYONE THOUGHT I WAS REALLY RUDE ???
yourusername: LMAOOOOOOOO
maxverstappen1: so so so easy bro
user48: i guess a couple that plays mind tricks together, stay together?
yourusername: 4eva
maxverstappen1: til death do us part
yourusername: quite literally you're not leaving me alone with GEORGE
georgerussell63: you know what: DIE
yourusername: GASP
maxverstappen1: @fia get his ass
fin.
note: HAPPY MAX VERSTAPPEN CHAMPIONSHIP DAY TO ALL WHO CELEBRATE. IE. ME LOL
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retiredteabag · 3 days ago
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Nobody yearns like Satoru yearns.
I mean this in several ways. Satoru will long for something in a steadfast fashion. Unwavering, undeterred, if he loves, he loves to the point of loss. And after that loss, he will continue to love some more.
When I say nobody yearns like he does, I also mean it to say, you would never know. He would hide his adoration behind playful jokes and bold smiles. He would pretend, perhaps embarrassed by the intensity of his affection, that his care for you was nothing more than platonic.
He would tease you and make funny quips, badgering you about your day or something he found equally interesting, and once he would finally get you going, have you sharing little bits and pieces of yourself, he would really, truly, listen.
I believe many people would see Satoru as a poor listener, he had a habit of speaking over someone and thinking his opinion was gospel, but when it came to those he cared for, he wanted nothing more than to sit with them, listen and watch them talk.
"What?!" You would eventually have to say, incredulous.
His eyes would widen, but a grin would fill his face, "Whaat~~?" He would question, alarm bells shooting up his spine at being caught. He had been lost staring at you and now you were uncomfortable.
"You're being creepy! How come you're not saying anything?" You would point at him dramatically and wait for a response.
Satoru would sit up, sarcasm rearing to go, "Ahhhhh I see~" He would start leaning in, "You just like to hear me talk, huh?" Poking at your cheek, his hand was swatted away. "I don't blame you, my voice is verrrrrrry attractive."
A highly disturbed expression crossed your face, "What are you- Is that what all your lady friends tell you?"
Finally leaning back, he would feel his heart race, using it as a faux show of offense, his palm would feel every frantic beat. But he would keep his cool.
"Don't feel bad for recognizing it too, I'm irresistible, I know. Look at you, all flustered because I was looking in your direction." He would hide the growing blush in his ears by haughtily huffing his nose to the sky.
"I'm not!- Satoru!- You- Ugh!" You would swat at him again and he would let his infinity down to feel you.
"No need to feel embarrassed, I'm used to it!" He would lean back, grinning.
Yes, for better or worse, nobody yearns quite the way he does.
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boomstab-papa · 2 days ago
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Oh absolutely, giving misogynists captive girlfriends/wives isn't going to fix anything. Being a little more misogynist to try to appease misogynists won't work.
But "giving any credence" is such an interesting phrase to use here, because it's so ambiguous and also accusatory. What does "giving credence" mean? Who has been doing it? What have they been advocating for? Who, for example, has been saying leftists should be more misogynist, and how?
I'm not alone in this confusion, either, there are several comments on the tweet who are equally perplexed.
The fact is that the left DOES NEED a better approach to people who are feeling lost, angry, and scared.
Alt-right "self-help" authors and programs are hugely popular. These predators target lost, scared, and angry people. They're cults, really. And no matter how much the left discusses things like "can we stop parroting bioessentialist bullshit because hey, men aren't destined to be misogynistic assholes"... these alt-right cultists don't ever even have to TALK TO a leftist to repeatedly hear "leftists hate you for being born white/male/rich/etc". I really can't get over how Rush Limbaugh popularized the term "feminiazi" and told an entire generation that feminists were angry man-haters when they literally are not. But that's exactly how the grift works!! I should know, I grew up in exactly this Rush Limbaugh kind of house!!
"Don't blame the hyper-wealthy for ruining the economy, blame women and foreigners for taking all the jobs! Don't blame the ruined economy when nobody wants to have kids anymore, blame the women! Don't blame patriarchy and all the misogyny it taught you when women avoid your misogynist ass, blame the women! Remember, the feminazis hate you!!"
So what to do?
On an interpersonal level, sometimes it can be really easy. This is a comment made to Innuendo Studios's video "How to Radicalize A Normie" on this exact topic (which I highly recommend watching).
"Hey, ex-alt-right member here. First, really like this series. I feel like you’re validating the radicalization that me and my male friends experienced. Putting it into words and showing us how we got tricked, exposing the magician and their tricks. Second, I vot out not through argument and discussion but actually through feelings. I was very edgy and would use the n-word in jokes all the time. My male friends would not call me out on it. But a female friend of mine said it made her uncomfortable and that she didn’t appreciate these jokes when we played fortnite together. That shook me to my core as I cared for my friend and that’s how my deradicaliztion started. Just wanted to add in this personal story, keep up the great work :)"
If this is someone you know, tell them their behavior is not cool.
THIS GOES DOUBLE FOR THE MEN READING THIS. Misogynists are more likely to listen to you than they are to listen to women!! If someone is being a shithead in your vicinity, consider: are you gonna let it slide? Or are you maybe, possibly, going to be the one thing that yanks them out of a hatespiral and prompts them to re-examine their hateful worldview? Tell them "hey not cool".
This might not work the first time. This might not work at all for some people. But if the situation is relatively safe, then it's worth trying.
And this does not mean that you personally are responsible for "centering men in your conversations" or "marginalized people putting in even more emotional labor" or "if a man is misogynist it's because you failed him" what the fuck ever like I've seen in this discourse. Come the fuck on.
It means you can probably try saying something to somebody you know. And if it doesn't work? You can say you tried.
On a policy level, we have more work to do. It shouldn't come as a surprise to any leftist that the current economic and political system in the USA exists to separate and exploit people. I think we all agree it really sucks to live in a system like this. Your average reactionary misogynist also thinks the system sucks, but as explained above, they've been trained to place the blame on some convenient scapegoats instead. Immigrants. Women. Queer people. Muslims. Anybody who's not white. Et cetera. "Government needs to get out of the way of smart people and then Elon Musk will build a utopia for The Faithful (which includes me) on Mars" or some shit.
These people need to hear that their anger is justified, but that their blame is misplaced. They need policies that will hold the responsible parties accountable. They need policies that won't leave them impoverished and isolated and exhausted after working a 40+ hour work week. They need to realize the system isn't sorting people into "the worthy rich" and "the unworthy poor", rather, that it's exploiting everyone except the wealth-owning class. They need to realize it's their politicians' biggest campaign donors that are doing this to them.
The Democratic Party needs to actually talk about this. I'll be dangerously pithy here: the Democratic Party needs to sound more like Bernie Fucking Sanders. Politicians need to oppose health insurance companies and get Medicare For All going. Politicians need to stop voting to give the military two fucking billion dollars every single day and fund free college and trade schools. Politicians need to tell business interests to fuck off and get a livable minimum wage AND a universal basic income passed, which will severely undercut employers' ability to exploit and isolate us.
And we need Citizens United repealed. Badly. I'm not trying to imply the problem is only with Republicans' campaign donors, because Democrats' biggest campaign donors are also often the same people exploiting us. But look at how Democrats did a tiny little bit of pro-union and anti-trust work these past 4 years and they screamed bloody fucking murder. If Democrats are relying on these people's money to get them elected, I think it's going to be really hard to get policies passed that will actually make USAmericans safer and happier (ie. address Republicans' economic fears that they keep blaming on various scapegoats).
Although with Republicans controlling the entire Federal government for the next two years minimum, this feels more distant than ever.
That's what we need to be taking seriously. If you don't give any credence to the fears and insecurities underlying the horrifying reactionary politics, you're not actually addressing anything. If you can't admit that capitalism fucks all of us over and makes all of us miserable and looking for a remedy, are you even a leftist?
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wonhes · 2 days ago
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ᝰ RII7E AND HOW THEY ACT WHEN THEY’RE JEALOUS
PAIRING: riize x reader
GENRE: fluff, maybe angst if u really squint and tilt ur head and turn ur phone to the side
WARNINGS: none that i can think of
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ᥫ᭡ SHOTARO
— stop because I genuinely believe shotaro wouldn't care. but like definitely not in a bad way! he just seems like the type to be so reassured in your relationship. he knows you wouldn't do anything to hurt him and vise versa. if he spots someone flirting with you, he would honestly just find it amusing. because can he really blame them? look at you! he would sit back and watch the scene unfold. I feel like he also wouldn't have an issue sharing you with his members either. like I feel like the boys would go to you for advice and would love having you around and he would love that! he only ever draws the line whenever he's trying to get some alone time with you and his members keep butting in. he wouldn't be super jealous, but he would more so be annoyed with maybe just a tad bit hint of jealousy. I can see him getting up from his spot and rolling his eyes before pushing away his members. he would shake his head at them before mumbling, "go away! my yn, it's my turn." as he shuts the door on their faces. he would turn back to you and let out a big sigh of relief with a playful smile on his face.
ᥫ᭡ EUNSEOK
— guys, eunseok to me seems like the type that gets jealous but is in complete denial about it. he teases you whenever YOU get jealous so he cannot show you that he gets jealous. bc he doesn't get jealous! fr fr! like pft him? eunseok jealous? no way! or at least that's what he keeps telling himself. but god whenever he sees someone is standing a little too close to you for his liking he swears he feels his eye twitch. and you keep smiling at them. why are you smiling? and did you just laugh? why are you laughing? so many thoughts would raise eunseok's head but he would shake them away and tightly grip on to whatever item he was currently holding. you would then spot him, run up to him, and place your arms around him but he would shake you off. he would mumble something along the lines of "go back to your little boyfriend" and you would immediately smirk at his words. seeing your smirk, he would quickly shake his head at you. he's not jealous! he doesn't get jealous! he really doesn't!!
ᥫ᭡ SUNGCHAN
— oh mf doesn't hide it nor does he try to. he trusts you 100% but he doesn't trust others. he seems like the type to never leave you alone in a gathering but if he has to, he would make it so quick. if he has to leave you and he sees someone else talking you up, he would glare at the other person from across the room and quickly come back to you. he would instantly place his hands on your waist and bring you closer to him. he would without a doubt insert himself in y'alls conversation as well. fake laughing along before sending the other person a tight lipped smile before asking, "what are we laughing at?" he makes sure everyone knows that you two are dating. oh and he would definitely kiss you in front of the person that was flirting with you. kinda in a way to tell them to back off without verbally saying it. but if he has to verbally say it, he definitely will. don't test my man. and please, he acts the exact same when you're talking to his members. he simply just doesn't want to share you.
ᥫ᭡ WONBIN
— ... I feel like there's two sides of jealous wonbin. on one hand, he seems like the silent jealous type. like as soon as he sees someone flirting with you, you best believe he's huffing and puffing. he would scoff at the sight and would clench his jaw as he would see the person continue to try and flirt with you but he wouldn't do anything about it. he would just silently stare daggers at them. and on the other hand, he "jokingly" acts like he's jealous but in reality, he's not joking. this side of him only ever comes out when you two are hanging out with his members though. like he always, and I mean always, has to have an arm, a hand or literally be around you when you two are hanging out with the boys. the boys would try and have a conversation with you and there wonbin was placing a quick kiss on your cheek causing you to revert your focus back to him. and that's why he does it. because he doesn't want you focusing too much on them.
ᥫ᭡ SEUNGHAN
— seunghan seems like the jealous type but the type that doesn't get jealous easily you know? he's the type to not care too much when someone is flirting with you but god when he sees you spending a little too much time with one of your friends that's where he draws the line. you two would be on the couch and then you mumble something about having to leave soon to go meet your friend. and seunghan would not be for it at all. he's immediately pouting and shaking his head. and instead of letting you go and telling you to be safe, like any other normal person would, seunghan hugs your figure tightly and places a leg over you to stop you from leaving him. when you giggle and tell him to let go, he immediately says no and continues pouting at you. "wouldn't you rather spend more time with your amazing, awesome, handsome boyfriend?" he would ask, offering you his best puppy dog eyes causing you to giggle and realize what was going on.
ᥫ᭡ SOHEE
— god sohee would get jealous but literally just the pouty jealous kind. he wouldn't know how to act or react to someone flirting with you. he wouldn't know what to say when he feels like you've been hanging out with your one of your friends a bit more either. he would literally just pout. he would be so pouty and often times would overthink things which would cause him to get a tiny bit insecure. all sohee ever wants to do is please you so if he sees someone else flirting with you or if he feels like you're spending more time with one of your friends he would simply sulk. and you knew of this too. so whenever you would see him pouting, you would immediately go up to him and place your lips against his while mumbling a soft "I love you." a wide smile would quickly replace his pout and he would instantly kiss you back before mumbling an "I love you more" and just like that all his worries and insecurities would quickly vanish.
ᥫ᭡ ANTON
— anton gets jealous over the little things but here's the catch, he doesn't actually realize he's jealous until he finds himself catching an attitude about it. you two would be hanging out with his members and he would see you getting a little too close to sohee and anton would immediately start losing it. he would act like if he didn't care but as soon as sohee is standing near him, he would purposely bump into him and offer him a lame ass "sorry" before continuing to walk to god knows where. he also seems like the type that would just completely shut down. the boys would try and get a conversation out of him but anton could quite frankly not care less. it wouldn't be until you would see him actively avoiding the members that you would go up to him and he would mumble out a quick, "what? is sohee busy now?" when you finally catch on to his jealousy, you would playfully ask if he's jealous. laughing you would wait for him to deny it but would be in complete shock when he shyly nods while avoiding your eye contact. ironic that he's tall because at that very moment he would feel so tiny and vulnerable. and silly, god he would feel so silly.
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zosan-secondchances · 3 days ago
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The Pirate King of the North: Part 2 with Concept Art
Main Themes: Villain Sanji, Alternate Universe, Zosan Ship
Warning: Long post ahead and some One Piece spoilers. Contains strong language.
Part 1 | 2 | 3
Let's go back a touch to when old Sanji reunited with his Zoro after the arm incident.
Sanji
I'm back Marimo-kun~! Sorry I was gone for so long!
Zoro
What the–? How the fuck did you get into my house?!
Sanji
Turns out I got this genetically-modified body so my limbs are practically replaceable! This isn't normal, right?
Commander 1
My Liege, we still need to attach the rest of the flesh.
Sanji
Oh, shush it now. I know it's just for padding at this point.
Anyway! This means we can keep fighting! Isn't that wonderful? I know your dad doesn't fight with that red-head anymore because of it.
Zoro
Dad? What are you…? Forget it. You're a freak. Get out. Now.
Sanji
Is…is it the hair? I thought I'd try something new…. I spent so long fixing it up for you. Do you not like it?
Zoro
Wait, what is that?
Sanji
Oh! This thing on my hand? It's a get-well-soon gift from my dear Doffy! He said I should at least try and make the fight fair for us so you won't get bored of me. What do you think?
Zoro
Fair? What do you mean fair?! And who the fuck is Doffy–?
Sanji
So many questions! Marimo-kun, I'm actually just here to propose. Let's go and get married!
Zoro
This…this must be some kind of a sick joke.
Sanji
I'm plenty serious actually. Come now, it'll be fun! If you marry me I'll give you all the sake you want~!
Zoro
You're barking mad if you think I'd agree to that.
Sanji
Commander, please present the dowry.
Darling, do you accept sea cows or do you prefer gold?
Zoro
Get the hell out of my house!!
Sanji
Hmm…you're right. I'm not doing this properly. Hey, is your dad still at Kuragaina? And was that a yes to sea cows?
Zoro
OUT!!!
This is Sanji's first of many marriage proposals.
---
Later in the week, a certain captain is over at Zoro's.
Law
You don't have to marry the man. Just get on his good side enough to get the information. I don't care how you do it.
Zoro
You ask too much this time, surgeon.
Law
Oh, for fuck's sake–you owe me. And I'm cashing in.
Zoro
Fine. But I'm only doing this for Luffy. What do you need exactly?
Law
I need to know if someone's still alive…. It's only a rumour but it would kill me I'd I don't find out for sure. And only he might know it.
Zoro
A friend of yours?
Law
You can say that.
Zoro
What's the name?
Law
It's…the Marines call him Corazon.
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Notes: I'm still exploring how to do dialogue the way my brain lays it out in my head. I've written scripts for storyboarding purposes before but Tumblr layout won't let me do what I need so bullet points it is. Oh well! Depending on feedback I might change it up.
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becausebuckley · 2 days ago
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michelle's buddie fic recs: week 47!
...plus a very special non-buddie fic!! an excellent reading week, once again. the 911 fandom has so many incredible writers!
this is a mix of fics with all ratings, so some include NSFW content. please take a look at both the ratings and the fic tags before reading! some might also contain spoilers for season 8.
if you come across something you like in this list, remember to show some love to the author by leaving kudos and a comment!
and i need you more than want you (and i want you for all time) | dykeries/@buddiesbian| 25.9k | E
Buck and Eddie's relationship changes over a series of phone calls. Along the way, their family finds its way back home to each other. there's something about phone calls for buddie that just hits so hard... doesn't matter if they're sex calls or emotional calls. this fic is so good, i devoured it!!
ball games | thesquinky | 8.4k | T
buck takes eddie to that lakers game, after all. buck and eddie at the lakers game!! kiss cams!! i was crossing my fingers someone would write a fic exactly like this and it did not disappoint <3
been there, done that (once or twice) | kaistinlove/@kaistinlove | 21.6k | E
the one where Buck wants to make a boudoir album and enlists Eddie's help as a photographer. i clicked on this SO FAST when i saw it!! so good so hot so perfect
DIAZ | mandolare/@confessionseddie | 3k | E
Buck wears the wrong jacket. buck needs to always wear the wrong jacket imo <3 so lovely!!
hold me like water | singomuse7 | 6.3k | T
Eddie's not the most oblivious person in the world and instantly understands what that closet joke meant, and instead of crashing out and blowing his life up about it, he gives Buck sensible advice and breaks up with Marisol. Cue 6k words of gay crisis during madney's wedding. i love love love this fic's eddie so much <3 so good!!
i belong with you, you belong with me (you're my sweetheart) | Distressed_Ladybug15/@cadiebug | 1.4k | GA
For a second they just stand there, staring into Chris’ room, then Buck tips his head back and to the side so he can meet Eddie’s eyes. “Hi,” he mumbles, voice hoarse and overused from work. i needed a little hurt/comfort like this a couple of days ago and it hit the spot perfectly <3
jee- yun's big day | rainbow_nerds/@rainbow-nerdss | 6k | GA
“So, Jee,” Mommy says. “You remember how we visited Daddy at work before?” Jee-Yun nods. “Captain Bobby says you can come to work with me for a whole day!” Daddy looks excited, and Jee thinks about it. Daddy’s work is pretty fun, she thinks. Captain Bobby cooked some really yummy pasta, and Uncle Buck is always there, and so are Aunt Hen and Uncle Eddie. THIS FIC. this fic is the non-buddie inclusion of this week but honestly i don't even care, i need everyone to read it immediately. the loveliest cutest jee ever, and such a lovely ensemble of characters around her <3
make a spark (break the dark) | prettyunhinged | 4.9k | E
Eddie is gay. Tommy sucks. Buck and Eddie frot about it on the couch. this fic is how i realised that there's an ao3 tag especially for eddie's couch and honestly, she deserves it <3 so hot so buddie so good!!
my home is your body | coldbam/@coldbam | 16.6k | E
Buck and Eddie have vastly different nights at Pride. Then very similar summers. this was a reread and it still hits so very hard. the ultimate buddie fwb fic!!
my man says he loves me (never says he loves me not) | colonoscopys/@colonoscopys | 9.7k | GA
croakett: I don’t know what to do tubbalubb: me neither He stares at the screen. Is this the correct time to bring up Buck’s abs? buddie online friendship AND irl friendship?? sign me right up wow i love this!! they're so silly and they love each other so much <3
please, please, please | bookinit/@bookinit02 | 8.7k | E
buck doesn’t touch eddie anymore. eddie’s losing it, a little bit. honestly eddie i'd lose it too. this fic combines pining and getting together and touch-starvation so basically if there was a venn diagram of my favourite fic tropes this would be right in the middle <3
red + white + boom | onlythemessenger | 3k | T
Unexpected fireworks catch Eddie off guard after a bad week. Buck and Bobby help him through the aftermath. bobbyeddie friendship my most beloved <3 love how this fic portrays them!!
this mortal coil (shuffle) | eirabach/@eirabach | 20.1k | M
Maddie was never supposed to be Buck’s mother. Eddie was never allowed to be his anything. But three minutes and seventeen seconds later, here they are. this fic hurt but in the best way. love maddie here in particular <3
this world turns over | dottie_weewoo/@dottie-wan-kenobi | 4.8k | T
Before Buck stands up fully, Eddie reaches out with his good hand to pet Christopher’s hair, pushing a few strands out of his face. “Goodnight, mijo,” he whispers, getting only a mumble in response. A soft smile steals over his face, his eyes moving from his son to Buck. “Hey, Buck?” domestic and wonderful <3 this was a lovely morning read on the bus earlier this week!!
we are bound | EiraLloyd/@unlifeira | 7.2k | T
Every human was born with a prophecy. That was the deal, or so they taught at school. But Evan knew better. He wasn’t born with a prophecy. He’d asked and asked and asked, but his parents shrugged every time, and eventually, Evan stopped asking. Why bother when he already knew the answer he’d get? i love the style and structure of this fic so so much, it's gorgeously written!! a true treat <3
you're looking like you fell in love tonight | devirnis/@devirnis | 1.1k | GA
There’s an arm slung across his waist, a head on his shoulder, soft hairs tickling the underside of his jaw. He breathes in, the cobwebs of sleep slowly dissolving in his brain, and he smells — Eddie. i did fall in love tonight and it was with this fic <3 so so lovely!!
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buck-star · 1 day ago
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Marshmallow lover | B.B & S.R
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>> Bucky comes home from a mission, flashbacks are brought back. But luckily you know what Bucky needs to clam down. Not only you and Steve but also hot chocolate. <<
Pairing: Boyfriend!Bucky Barnes × Boyfriend!Steve Rogers x Girlfriend!Reader
Wordcount: 2.852 Words
Warnings: poly-relationship, m/m/f, established relationship, anxiety/panic, mention of punching), nicknames (babydoll, princess, majesty), fluff
Authors Note: Reposted because I accidentally deleted the other one. Dedicated to @mercurial-chuckles. Cause you asked for Stucky, hehe. I had another idea but I just haven't had enough motivation or ideas to write it. So I hope you like that one anyway. Divider made by me.
Events: Stucky Bingo [SB6010 | B3 | Writing Format: second person + November Prompt: Home I @stuckybingo], Steve Rogers Bingo [SB4054 | C3 | Free Space | @steverogersbingo]
Masterlist | Stucky x Reader Masterlist
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It was one of these early winter days, where the weather wasn't too cold but you could already feel the breeze the winter was bringing with itself. The air was cool; your hands would have been ice blocks already, but luckily your boyfriend was holding one of them, and the other has been stuck in your pocket since the two of you left the house.
Actually, the two of you thought about staying home until Bucky came home — from the mission — in the evening. But when Bucky told you that he wouldn't be home before the late evening, Steve decided to force you in a loving way to go shopping with him. He knew you loved decoration, so it was the best opportunity to make you leave the house and have some fun with him. Otherwise, you would have sat in the hallway, watching the front door until Bucky walked inside.
It happened once, and both of your men made sure that they would distract you if the other one was on a mission and came home late. Of course, they understood why you acted like that; it was weird to have one of you not in bed at night or missing at the table during meals. Even watching television was different if one of them was on a mission — which didn't happen often anymore.
But after the last time you refused to leave the spot in the hallway unless you had to use the bathroom, Steve took you shopping this time. And luckily, he managed to get your mind off of the fact that Bucky could be injured when he came home. Even though you seemed distracted, Steve felt a little restless; he knew you felt the same, but he just hoped the decoration was distracting enough for you. Little did he know that you hoped the same for him, because deep down, you wanted to return home to make sure that Bucky was fine once he came home. But you tried to calm yourself; Bucky could call you once he was home, and he could take care of himself for a bit too. Plus, he sometimes even enjoyed having a moment just for himself after some missions.
When you had some items you wanted and were happy with, you and Steve made your way back home. It was just a short walk, but the later it got, the colder it was. You were shivering, and Steve's strong arm around your waist and his muscular body pressed against your side didn't help much to warm you up. “You know, my tooth...” you chuckled softly, moving them inside your shoes even though you didn't really feel them because of the cold anymore. “They are pretty cold. Guess they would fall off if I bumped them.”
“Then we get you home pretty fast. Don't want your toes to fall off. Bucky wouldn't like that either," Steve joked, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your hair. The two of you didn't talk much; there was no need. It was just the closeness to one another, the happiness and love that you felt whenever you were close to your boyfriends. So you just walked quietly along the streets with him, the sky slowly darkening, and you were glad you were almost home already.
After a few more minutes of walking, you finally walked into the warm house. It was almost a burning feeling on your skin, and you hissed softly. Steve had to shove you into the house, or else you would probably have walked backwards and out of the warmth back into the cold. He chuckled behind you, his calloused hands holding you by your waist before pushing you further into the hallway so he was able to close the door behind you.
“It's warm, isn't it? Maybe it’s because you're surrounded by such hot men.” Steve laughed softly, taking your jacket, before he took off his own jacket and shoes. You narrowed your eyes when you walked further into your house, looking around to find Bucky. You were sure he was home; his shoes were in the hallway where they belonged. But instead of your boyfriend coming immediately to greet the two of you, he was nowhere to be seen. Steve's voice interrupted your thoughts before you could even start to worry. “Maybe he's in the bedroom; he loves showers after a mission. While you look for him, I'm gonna make some hot chocolate for us.”
You nodded, pecking Steve's lips softly, before you turned away to walk to your shared bedroom. You didn't hear any noises, neither the shower nor Bucky looking through the wardrobe to find something comfortable to wear. You tried as best as you could to not worry about him. Bucky was sometimes pretty quiet, especially after missions. It was almost like he had to get used to home again to know he wasn't on a mission any longer.
The door of your bedroom was almost closed, but you saw a little part of the bed, the small bedside table, and a hint of something else — feet. Or it was more the toes that were curled, like they were the only part that was holding him grounded. You pushed the door open, looking to the side where Bucky was sitting. Your eyes widened as you saw him curled up into himself. His knees were pressed against his chest, his hands properly bruising his skin already, while his eyes were unfocused. Bucky was just staring into the air with a fearful expression on his handsome face.
You slowly walked closer to him, unsure what to do. Sweat was running down his forehead; even his hair was sweaty, and his clothes were stuck to him like a second skin — soaked in sweat. You're not sure how long he was sitting there like that; his teeth gritted, his jaw clenched, and you noticed his other muscles being more visible than usual through his clothes. Bucky was tense like he was still in a fight, and in a certain way he was — but instead of fighting against some people like Hydra, he was fighting his own battle with himself, with his fear in his mind.
“Bucky?” You asked softly, your voice just above a whisper when you kneeled down in front of him. There was still some distance, so he wasn't able to reach you if he would punch or kick. You have seen Steve in such situations with Bucky before; he had to take the one or another punch already — which caused Bucky to feel even more guilty after. But Steve always assured him that it's not as bad as it looks and that it would never change anything about the way he feels for Bucky or sees his boyfriend. And even though he never hurt you, Bucky was always sorry that you had to see him struggling so much with his nightmares and flashbacks from the past — you never judged him; you only loved him more when he couldn't love himself.
Bucky didn't react when you called him by his name. His fingers only tightened around his legs. You wanted to reach out, but you know you shouldn't. Bucky once had his hand around Steve's throat the moment his fingertips brushed along his lover's leg. And you knew Steve was stronger than you; he had struggled to get the other super soldier off of him, so you were pretty sure Bucky would crash you before you could even call for Steve. And both told you to never call Steve for help; they trust and love you, but they were too worried about you — and Bucky would never be okay with himself again if he would hurt you. And you understood it.
After another time calling him by his name but getting no answer, you sigh softly. Tears slowly formed in his eyes, rolling down his cheeks, and everything inside of you screamed to wipe them away, to pull him into you, but you were too afraid to scare him even more. So, you decided to make the only thing that came as an alternative solution to your mind — Steve.
From the time you walked into the bedroom to the moment you got up to walk to the door and shout for Steve, only a few minutes passed. But for you, it felt like at least twenty minutes, not being able to help Bucky and not wanting to leave his side while you tried to come up with something that could help without Steve's help.
You opened the door of your shared bedroom a bit more, looking out into the hallway. “Steve!” You shouted, earning immediately a soft ‘Yes.’ from him. He was still making the hot chocolate, but he was worried the moment you shouted his name instead of coming into the kitchen with Bucky. “I—I need you here. Or Bucky needs you... WE NEED YOU.”
Steve would have chuckled about your wording, but he knew that this wasn’t a situation to laugh about. He immediately turned off everything that could burn. His footsteps were loud and heavy when he walked to your shared bedroom. He noticed you looking out of the door, narrowing his eyes when he didn't see Bucky close to you. The big grump was actually holding you close, hugging, carrying, or kissing you the whole time. But right now, it was only you who waited for him to come to the bedroom.
"Where's Buck? Are you okay? Did he… What's wrong?” Steve asked, not even letting you a moment to answer. You brought your hand to his cheek, stroking it softly before giving him a slight, soft smile. He knew you didn't feel like you tried to show, but he knew you did it to calm the two of you down. It wouldn't help any of you to freak out or be more worried. After a moment, you take your hand away, taking a step to the side, and letting Steve walk into the room.
“He doesn't react when I talk to him. I-I don't know what I can do, but you... You trailed off, watching Steve's eyes widen as he saw your boyfriend looking like a lost puppy. You watched him walk over to Bucky, pulling you with him before Steve pushed you to sit down on the bed, and he kneeled down in front of Bucky. Steve was way closer than you were earlier, and you pulled your knees up, hugging them while you watched your boyfriends intensely. “You know what to do, right?”
Steve nodded, smiling softly. He turned his head back to Bucky, placing his hand on the brown-haired man's knees. Bucky hissed; his metal hand shot up to place a punch into Steve's pretty face, but he caught Bucky's hand. Steve held Bucky's hand tightly, trying to force his hand back down, and after a moment it even worked. You watched them with slightly parted lips; when did Steve find out how to catch Bucky's hand — especially his metal hand?
“Buck, it's me. It's Steve. You're home; do you hear me?” Steve asked, his voice soft. He ran his thick fingers slowly up and down the side of Bucky's thigh. He leaned a bit closer; his other hand was still holding Bucky's metal hand, and you wonder if Bucky was trying to punch him with his other hand but he didn't. “You're home, with me and our princess. You know, your babydoll.”
Bucky gasped softly, his eyes wider than before. His hands made grabbing motions, and Steve smiled softly, feeling Bucky being less tense than he was just a moment ago. Steve let go of his boyfriend's metal hand, using his hand to wipe away some sweat from Bucky's forehead.
“Hi, Buck,” he chuckled. Bucky slowly calmed down, noticing his surroundings. Bucky was slowly letting go of his legs, stretching them slowly between Steve's legs while his head fell forward against Steve's shoulder. “You're home; we are home. We got ya. Scared our princess a bit.”
“My babydoll?” Bucky's voice was hoarse and quiet, but Steve understood him anyway. He slowly nodded, caressing Bucky wet strands. Steve then turned his head to you, nodding at Bucky and mouthing that he just asked for you before he even asked anything else. “My babydoll, my Stevie.”
“We’re here, Buck. Do you want her to come closer as well, or do you need a moment?” Steve asked softly. He knew — you both knew — that Bucky was still pretty shaken up and that he could use some time to calm down or that he needed to feel the two of you, to smell the two of you, and to see the two of you to calm down completely.
Since the brown-haired man didn't really trust his voice, he only lifted his hand, making a grabby hand into the direction of the bed where you were still sitting. His other hand was interlaced with Steves, holding him close to Bucky. You slowly moved down from the bed; your knees were cracking softly when you stretched them out, and Steve laughed softly.
“Thought we were old, but you're cracking just like we do,” he told you, smirking before he moved a bit to the side to make space for you in front of Bucky. You rolled your eyes, moving closer to Bucky, but before you could have even said anything or moved another inch, he pulled you into his lap. You were straddling his thick thighs, your chest pressed against his.
Bucky hid his face in the crock of your neck, pulling Steve against his side so the two of you — the two people he loved the most, who meant everything to him — were as close as possible to him. After a moment of comfortable silence, he lifted his head. He was still sweaty, but his ocean blue eyes were brightened, and the sparkle you and Steve loved so much were visible again. A soft smile was tugging at Bucky's lips, causing you to smile as well. He leaned closer, pecking your lips before he did the same with Steve, sighing softly.
“Hi,” he chuckled, resting his head on your shoulder once again. “Missed you two. Do I smell hot chocolate?”
Both you and Steve laughed softly. When it came to hot chocolate, especially with marshmallows, you had to be faster than Bucky, or else he — accidentally — drank everything before you even reached the kitchen.
“Mhm, it’s probably cold again, but I can warm it up while you get a shower, sweaty,” Steve teased, using the nickname on purpose instead of ‘sweety’. Bucky rolled his eyes, growling softly, but he then nodded. Steve wasn't wrong; he felt like he had already taken a shower, but this time with his own sweat. “We got some marshmallows, and our princess got a lot of decorations.”
You nodded; your eyes lit up as you opened your mouth to start and explain what you got and why you got it. Bucky chuckled, loving your excitement. But he wanted you to show him and explain it while the three of you would be sitting wrapped up in a blanket on the couch with hot chocolate and marshmallows. So he pressed his lips onto yours before you could even start to tell him more about it.
“But I'm taking my babydoll to take a shower with me,” Bucky grumbled, and there he was again. Your Bucky, the love of your and Steve’s lives who never let go of you, who needed to be close to you, needed to kiss you and just show you all the love and affection. Of course, he did the same with Steve too, but he had another task, so it was you who was going to join him in the shower. “Plus, need her to wash my hair. Feels so much better when she massages the shampoo into my hair with her soft hands.”
“Of course you do,” Steve chuckled, pressing a soft kiss to Bucky and then your forehead before he got up to get the chocolate ready. Bucky opened his mouth, but Steve turned around, smirking at him. “Yeah, with as many marshmallows as you wish, my majesty.”
“Good boy.” Bucky grinned at Steve, who suddenly blushed and turned away. “Mission completed, making Stevie blush. Now, my next mission is to get you into the shower with me. Mhm, missed you. I love you so much, babydoll. And you too, Steve, I know you're standing in the hallway.”
“I love you too,” you say in unison with Steve, who then made his way down the hallway back to the kitchen. Bucky got up, keeping you in his arms before he walked with you to the bathroom, getting the two of you into the shower. It wasn't just cleaning him; it was a lot more Bucky being possessive and touch-starved, and you were his solution — you were gladly his way to get touches and be happy when it meant kisses, hugs, soft touches, and all the compliments you loved so much to hear from your boyfriends.
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Taglist: @pono-pura-vida @sergeantbarnessdoll @rogersbarber @kimmie113080 @sebastianstanisahotmf
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mrgrimreaper1 · 2 days ago
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Dude this is sick, reminds me of this cool different Undertale multiverse idea I've made one day.
[this whole Multiverse happens like, years down the line, pretty much a time skip AU causing error and ink to be much stronger for some reason, there's a reason why I scrapped it a lot of the story is me making a scenario in my head and struggling to explain why it happens the way it does.]
In it error sans finally managed to end ink, and once he does it he regrets it later on because of the boredom that come from no one on his level to really attempt to fight back against him destroying things, and since there was no one making Another AU protector for so long, he needed to slow down on destroying the AU's because of [reasons that don't really make any sense for his canon character to do, because he would probably destroy them all regardless of how he would feel about it afterwards, which is why I've made this a completely different multiverse altogether AND scrapped it.]
Because in this MV (MultiVerse) he would die of absolute boredom if he actually destroyed everything in one swoop, so he needed to balance destroying things and then wait for creators to create more anomalies for him to destroy, which he finds really annoying, so in his absolute bored out of his mind state, he makes the choice to create something himself.
A replacement for ink that could rival him and force creators to work overtime and make more anomalies for him to destroy, he takes a pen and paper and sketches a sans design heavily based on ink, which is why this version of "ink" is named "sketch!sans" with nicknames like "sketchy, sketched, sketchup." [Ketchup joke, made by either classic sans or fresh sans, haven't really chosen who did it, could be any Sans', really.]
Then to bring this character to life error after a while of trying he would get really frustrated, because he doesn't know how to do it, making him throw the drawing away.
Causing it to fall down to the bottom of ink's doodle sphere where the remains of the destroyed AU's remained or something causing sketch sans to actually be created...
[...This only works here because I reworked what happens once you destroy an au, in this multiverse once you destroy an AU, the Portal to said AU in the doodle sphere turns into magic ink and it remains at the bottom of the doodle sphere for the rest of eternity, but thanks to how many AU's we're destroyed they accumulated and mixed together, making a huge mess.]
Thanks to the ink being mixed together this version of ink sans would come out with a lot defects, he would come out of the ink "colorless" or just "black, white and grey." Being straight up a blank Canvas, a husk of what the real ink is supposed to be, so a lot of his emotions were muddled and he didn't act like what you'd expect ink to act like...
...Causing sketch sans to be very insecure? Maybe, his whole character arc that I've had planned for him is him trying to live up to error's expectations and straight up trying his damnest to act like ink would, causing a lot of identity crisis's until he met the star Sanses and they explain to him why he simply can't get his whole attempt to imitate ink right, so they introduce him to the vials ink used to act the way he did, then sketch would start going after said vials to act more like ink, as he kept finding and drinking more of these vials he would slowly and surely becoming a lot more like ink and he would regain his colors with each vial, with error constantly encouraging this to make him keep going and get the real ink back, thanks to error's inability to care for sketch's whole identity crisis causing sketch to reach his breaking point when he meets Cross!Sans and his whole thing and experience with identity crisis's and making him realize how abusive this relationship with error is, causing him to either cut ties with error or just become his own person and completely ignore error's wishes, and just deal with him without the pressure of having to act like ink, or whatever, I don't have a proper ending to it.
It was nice getting this off my chest and head.
ERROR!INK (ASYNC SANS)
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ok so, finally came with a full idea of this character:D an error version of ink. i'll be listing some facts and clarifications about him to prevent any kind of confusion, just under the cut!
i wanted to write his entire backstory on here but it ended up being a little too much longer than i expected so maybe i'll make a comic about it- or no (wheheh). but basically everything started when he also tore his soul but appeared in the anti-void instead of a normal void that would eventually become his doodle sphere
now, his design choices
he's wearing the first ever clothes he used in His Story comic
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his eyes colors were chosen thanks to their inverts, those specific magenta and blue are the opposites of green and yellow, the first colors he experienced in his original story
the marks on his body are white to represent the meaning of the few white garments in his original design: "The white layer underneath says how he attempts to hide who he is, but his emptiness sometimes shines through."
his "tattoos" are no longer illegible when he turns into an error, they become common binary codes (the font used for these is Note This, ink's official font)
the red (magenta) eye is on the right side to somehow symbolize the blood his "scar" would cause
there is no yellow on his clothes to show how secretive he is, as he constantly hides half his face in his scarf
personality traits and extra facts!
as said before he is someone incredibly reserved, mostly because while being in his 5 senses he is afraid of his self without his doses of paints and tries to not attract attention
nonetheless, he likes being around people, he would probably travel across universes to hang out hidden in crowded places
the "specific situations" mentioned on the first part of the sheet refer, for the most part, to self-defense. but there may be other situations where he simply creates stuff that people ask for from time to time
compared to his original counterpart, he will take much longer to drain as he'll rarely use his powers
if he talks for too much time he'll glitch for an instant and forget everything he was saying. that is one of the reason he doesn't enjoy talking so much
when he's in the doodle sphere he often has momentary traumatic hallucinations, so he tries to leave that place as quickly as possible
these previously mentioned hallucinations also happen in panic situations or as a sign that the ingested paints are no longer effective
okie dokie i think that's all for now<3 if anything comes to my mind later or anytime i'll try to post it or smth! hope you like it🫶
ink sans by @/comyet
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leehslvr · 3 days ago
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˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ Fans ship you with another member
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── when you've been dating in secret but the fans think you look good with his bandmate
pair ⟢ enhypen x idol!reader
genres ⟢ fluff, one shot, humor
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HEESEUNG
Heeseung was not new to the concept of shipping. Getting involved involved in multiple cases himself, he's already come to the point where he has gotten used to all the edits and theories. So seeing his s/o get involved in some of their own was not really a shock.
Until he came across a few tiktok conspiracies of you and Sunghoon after the two of you hosted together for a music show. Comments were flooding with statements of how you both had good chemistry and that you two would make a good couple.
"Should I request the company to get us to MC together for the next show or..." Heeseung suggested, rewatching the edit on his phone.
"You could. Then you could kiss me as part of an adlib too if you want" You joked, knowing too well how that would get the both of you in a lot of trouble. "Don't test me" He replied with a smirk growing on his face
JAY
Award show season was a field day for fans. Other than the awards and performances, people always looked forward to the interactions and stage reactions. And it wasn't any different for the Heeseung and Y/N shippers.
As you were seated in the audience watching your boyfriend, Jay perform his part of their performance with Heeseung, you couldn't help but enjoy yourself with the stage they just put up. But of course, the fans thought differently. Shippers online were talking about how you were gushing and cheering for his bandmate rather than him, which Jay thought was absurd considering that there were two members on the stage at that time.
"I was right there, how could they get it so wrong?" He complained while scrolling through the tags causing you to laugh at his reaction. "If it helps, I could start smiling when you start singing your parts in the next show." "Please"
JAKE
"So care to explain why the internet thinks you and Sunoo would make a good couple?" You turned your head to meet with your boyfriend's face who was pouting while trying to show your ship name trending.
Hundreds and hundreds of tweets talking about the compatibility of you and Sunoo would have has gone wild. So much, that even an article was written about it. 'Not a couple, but we wouldn't mind if they were'
"I don't know. You tell me" You replied as you reached out to grab the phone from his hand to see the edits of you and his bandmate. Most of which talking about how your visuals compliment each other and how you have a lot of similarities. "Hm...we do look cute don't we?" "Hey!" Jake protested, grabbing his phone back. "Individually, yes. Together? No way. You're mine"
SUNGHOON
"You won't believe what I just found" Ni-ki stated as he entered the living room. You were staying over at the Enhypen dorms for the afternoon before you head over for you comeback practice. "There's this fanfiction of Y/N and Jungwon going around"
Sunghoon quickly straightened his back and grabbed the phone from Ni-ki's hand to see what he was talking about. And there it was, a fanfiction of his s/o and bandmate with tons of likes. "Jungwon!" He shouted causing you to grab his wrist. "Oh calm down, it's not like it's true" "Yeah well I'm just saying, if it was about you and me, that story would've been published on bookstores"
"I have nothing to do with this by the way" Jungwon protested as he looked over the maknae's shoulder to see what the commotion was about.
SUNOO
It was widely known about how amazing of a dancer you were. It was one of the things Sunoo loved about you. But it was also one of the things the internet saw as something you had in common with Enhypen's maknae.
When the year-end show's were beginning to be announced, fans rushed online to request a special stage with you and Ni-ki, with some even going as far as calling it a "couple dance".
"Couple dance? What are they talking about couple dance? Just 'dance' is where we draw the line" Sunoo protested with a pout on his face. Amused to see the jealous look on his face, you couldn't help but smother him in kisses. "You're so adorable, you know that? And besides, that just means I have more excuses to visit your practice room"
JUNGWON
It was comeback season for both you and your boyfriend's group. Of course, you couldn't pass on the opportunity on doing a tiktok challenge with them. This time, the task of doing the challenge was going to be with Jake. But it wasn't a problem for you or Jungwon. He still made sure to support his s/o and his bandmate as he watched them film for the video.
That was until they were up and posted, and the comments started talking about how the two of them looked cute and that they were beginning to ship them.
"Okay, from now on, I'll be doing all your tiktok challenges"
"But what if-"
"I will do all of them"
NI-KI
You probably lucked out because it wasn't everyday that you got the chance to film a variety show with yours and your boyfriend's group.
Everyone was having a blast. The whole cast was laughing and joking around, Enhypen and your members seem to be very comfortable around each other, and you get to spend the whole day with Ni-ki.
When a part of the game asked you to pair up with someone else from the lineup, and Jay just so happens to be the person available to the job.
When the show was aired, the shipping was almost inevitable. The edits and the conspiracy theories were everywhere! Contrast to popular belief, I don't think Riki is the type to get jealous over something as silly (as what he describes it) as fans making ship edits, but he will make it a topic at the table.
"Jay hyung, I heard you and y/n-"
"Whatever you have to say, I don't want to hear it"
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tarosunshine · 2 days ago
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희승⠀﹕ 𝒟ESIGNATED DRIVER⠀﹐
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﹕⠀it seems like he doesn't like you.⠀✦
lee heeseung female reader ⊹ fluff one shot ﹙1658﹚ . . . shelf ! not proofread
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today, one of your friends organized a small reunion/sleepover, so you arrived on time with a bag on your shoulder, with some snacks and some clothes in there. and the one who opened the door was nothing more than lee heeseung, wearing black sweatpants and a white t-shirt, with his red bangs over his eyes as he was holding a joystick with his free hand.
“hey” he didn't look at your eyes for more than a second, letting you some space to come in. you just greeted him the same way with a tiny smile.
after that, he seated again on the sofa to keep playing with sunoo on the tv. so after saying hi to the younger one, you made your way to the kitchen, where jay and jake were washing and drying some dishes. scaring them from behind, you also greet them, leaving your bag on some chair.
“okay, i need to ask you a favor..” jake begun to talk without turning to look at you. and you hummed, waiting for him to continue. “so, i thought i bought the tomato sauce to make the pizzas, but it seems like i didn't, so..”
“so, you want me to go buy it” you sighed, piercing the back of his head. he smiled, knowing you couldn't look at him.
“i would go, but since i have this injury on my knee.. i can't drive” jay says as he keeps washing. jake nodded in agree, now looking at you, trowing you his puppy eyes.
“and i'm helping him to dry this..” now jake says, excusing himself immediately.
something of all of this was kinda suspicious, but you didn't care so much, so you just nodded as you looked at both of them.
“yeah, but i can't drive, remember?” a wide smile appeared on jake's face.
“and thats why hee is gonna be your chofer. and before you ask, he don't know anything about cooking, so that's the reason i didn't tell him to go” you looked over your shoulder and heeseung was invested on the tv, laughing about something with sunoo.
you get back your eyes to your friend, who was wide smiling. “all right then.”
“great, you're the best! now take the money from my wallet, that it's over there” he made a head movement, pointing you his wallet so you went grab it.
“hey” you hear another voice from behind you, and after you can turn, you feel an open palm over your head, messing your hair a little.
“hey, riki” you smiled at the taller boy who was also smiling at you. then he greeted jake and jay before going to the sofa where heeseung and sunoo were.
after some minutes of chatting with the old ones, you remembered that you needed to go to buy what jake asked minutes ago.
you just accepted your destiny, which was to stay alone with heeseung. and you were so sure that he didn't like so much.
“okay, then we'll be back in a bit!” you started walking to the sofa, where niki and sunoo were now playing, as heeseung watched the screen.
you tap his shoulder from behind, and he raises up his face to look at you. “you're my designated driver.” heesung looks at you with curious eyes, but he got up anyway, following you till the door.
“i wasn't aware of this..” he murmured as you two walked through the hallway to the elevator.
“ah, you don't want to drive me?” you joked with a smile as you looked at him behind you over your shoulder. he slightly shakes his head.
“it's fine.” you nood in response as your two entered the elevator.
something seemed off each time you spoke with heeseung. he always is awkward around you, giving you fast and short responses, not looking at you and even putting a considerable distance between you two. even now that you were on a small elevator. at some point a few months ago, all that it kinda hurt you.
it was silent until you reached his car, entering and putting your seat belt. and heeseung made the same, after he put some music. thank god, or the trip would be more awkward.
you agreed with this, yeah, but how could you say no to jake?
“i heard that now you're the basketball captain, congrats” you tried to make some conversation because you were about to die because of this situation. he just nodded, slightly curving his lips in an almost inexistent smile.
“yeah, it was the last year of my senior, so he recommended me as the captain.”
“well thats great. it means you're good at it” you said, watching from the corner of your eyes his side profile. he chuckled, and it was the first time you saw heeseung reaction in that away around you.
“i think so” he shrugged his shoulders as he kept his eyes on the street.
after some seconds of silence, he asked, “your never came to one of our games?” you were watching outside with your chin resting on your hand, so you look at him by the corner of your eye again.
“nop, sience jay and jake, play on the soccer team. i just go to watch them” you simply respond without looking at him properly. “i don't go to the games if i don't have someone to go for.”
“and what about me?” his question took you by surprise, making you slowly turn your head in his direction. his eyes were fixed ahead and his lower lip between his teeth.
“what about you?”
“why you don't go to see me too?” his tone was lower. you almost believed that he was.. complaining?
“yeah? well, i thought that you didn't like me” the words came out like an affirmation, making heeseung frown his eyebrows.
“what? why do you think that?” he turned the steering wheel, watching you from the corner of his eye. you two were almost at the parking of the supermarket.
“it's obvious, heeseung.. you barely speak to me. you avoid me like the plague. you don't even want to stand beside me.” now you look outside, preparing yourself to take off your seat belt.
it was so embarrassing to say that out loud. admitting that you cared about how he treated you, or well, doesn't treat you.
heesung finally parks, turning off the car. and when he was about to speak, you opened the door, walking to the supermarket. the red-haired boy just rushed to your side, walking a few steps away from you in silence.
the next 15 minutes, all it was between the two of you were silent and an awkward tension. so when you finally came out with the bottle of tomato sauce, you just entered the car in silence.
you put your seat belt again, waiting to heeseung to turn on the car, but all he do is stay in silence for a few seconds, like thinking about something. then he finally turns his body in your direction, meeting your eyes, making you feel nervous.
“it's not that i don't like you” he sighed, lowering his eyes to his hands, “actually.. it's quite the opposite” you frown your eyebrows, trying to understand his words. “i like you, like really like you.”
the bottles of sausage clink on your arms as you blink a couple of times in his direction. his eyes meet yours one more time, and your heartbeat increases.
“i know that maybe you don't believe me because i do all what you said, but it's because i don't know how to act around you. i start to be completely useless. an idiot when you even talk to me.” he chuckles with suddenly shyness.
“heeseung i..”
“it's okay. you don't have to feel the same way. i just wanted to tell you this so you don't have to think that i hate you or something.” his big eyes were staring yours with such brightness that you never ever seen before, or you didn't notice.
“i know, but..”
“and don't worry. if you are uncomfortable after this, i can leave you some space or whatever you want.” he keeps interrupting you without even notice.
“heeseung!” you exclaim softly. he stares at you with his surprised bambi eyes, opening his mouth to speak, but you interrupt him. “if you like me, like you said.. then why didn't you notice that i feel the same way?”
“what?”
at this point, your heart was about to jump out of your chest. but you simply nood. “yeah, you dork. sience last year.”
“what?” he babbles still with his eyes widened.
“stop saying that..” you chuckle, carefully leaving the bottles on your lap, so you could face him properly.
“i'm sorry. it's just.. i thought you had a crush on jay or something.” you shake your head, holding your laugh.
“that's impossible. he's like my older brother” you roll your eyes, and after thinking about it a couple of seconds, you reach his hands with yours.
“i like you since last year too..” he murmured, looking at your hands and grabbing his. “i feel like an idiot now.”
“then we're two.”
he raised his face to look at you again, and a wide smile finally appeared on his lips, making you smile too. “then i can take you out on a date?”
you pretend to think about it, making heeseung's heart stop, but seconds later you nood. “yeah, of course.”
“all right!” the two of you let go of each other's hands, sitting straight up in your seats.
heesung finally turns on the car after putting his seat belt. but after he started driving, he froze for a few instants, and you look at him with curiosity. his fits over the steeling wheel as he bite the inside of his cheek.
“what's—”
he interrupted you with a short kiss on your lips. and after you can reciprocate, he is back to his place, starting to drive. you look at him with surprise as you blink.
then you start laughing when you see his side profile again, especially his ears. “hee, your ears are the same color as the tomato sauce. no, even brighter!”
“they're not!” he replied, embarrassed.
“they are!” you keep laughing and mocking him, finally making him smile too.
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lost-romantique · 20 hours ago
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The Needs of Both these Messy Gays~
I just want to make a point and state that I'm not attacking or pitting both these guys against each other. They're dumbasses, the both of them.
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Blitz is someone that is going to need constant reassurance when he's in a relationship.
Being told the words "I love you" scares the fuck out of him because he doesn't trust those words of love.
At the same time, romantic gestures don't work on him because he's always going to assume the worst.
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"And then, he'll call me to see how my day was! And he'll pretend to care about me, and comment on my photos, and LAUGH AT MY JOKES—"
Blitz is someone that has used his body and sex as a way to get what he wants. But his relationship to sex is one of the reasons why he's unable to trust those romantic gestures.
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Blitz constantly seeks reassurance, and he asks Stolas for that reassurance a LOT throughout Full Moon and Apology Tour...
"Am I not, like, fucking you good enough? Because I-I can always- I can always do better--"
Blitz immediately asks Stolas for reassurance that he's good enough, and that if he isn't good enough, he makes it a point to tell Stolas that he can do better.
Stolas responds to Blitz saying he cares very deeply for him, but being told he's cared about doesn't give him the reassurance he needs.
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Blitz asks for reassurance twice from Stolas in Apology Tour...
"This whole thing we had going... I'm- I mean you're a fucking prince. How could you ever actually care for an imp... Me? How could anybody?"
"Stolas, you are better off without me. 'Kay? You deserve so much... I don't even know why you would want to be with me."
Stolas never says anything really wrong in his responses to Blitz, and I think Blitz himself needed to here that. BUT if Stolas were to make one mistake, it would be that he states that he wants somebody / anybody.
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Blitz doesn't reach out to Stolas because of his issues in intimacy, and because Blitz himself hasn’t been given the reassurance that he's the one Stolas wants.
Do you know who does give Blitz the reassurance that he's needed? Millie.
Millie is able to give concrete examples to Blitz on how he made an impact on her life.
In fact, Millie states that Blitz is the reason that everything she has in her life is thanks to him being unapologetically himself.
"He gave me so much: a career, a husband, a future, and now... he's my best friend."
The moment Millie gives Blitz the example of how much she values him as a person and as a friend, Blitz immediately asks for reassurance...
"You... you don’t hate me?"
And Millie automatically says, "Nah, never."
The moment Blitz is given the reassurance that he isn't hated by Millie, he opens up, he becomes vulnerable.
Blitz allows Millie to comfort him, and Blitz initiates that intimacy with Millie to which she obliges.
What's beautiful about this exchange is that there isn't anything remotely sexual about it. This is just one friend comforting another friend in need.
Blitz asks for reassurance again in the form of a question...
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And the moment Millie reaffirms that sentiment, Blitz opens up and shows Millie the real him.
Not the fuckboy facade, not the mask he wears... this is the REAL Blitz...
Blitz also shows incredible growth by not deflecting to jokes like he usually does, but instead by being honest with Millie...
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Blitz promises to Millie that he'll stop impeding on her marriage
Blitz states in the most subtle way that he has feelings for Stolas
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Stolas needs to be told that he's cared for and that he's loved by someone.
He's also someone that seeks romantic affection in the form of compliments, and big and small romantic gestures mean the world to him as well.
Blitz unknowingly makes Stolas’s romantic fantasies come true...
A rogue assassin comes into his bedroom to "scale the walls" and he acts like he wants Stolas a lot.
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This man is attractive, he is literally the protagonist of a romance novel. His boldness and confidence is alluring. He is a dream come true and he's here to take what's his.
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This man just literally sweeps Stolas off his feet, and he still does this while giving you the most smug grin.
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Blitz throws Stolas to the bed, and gives him ultimate rizz in the form of this shit eating grin.
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And the moment Blitz bites his neck, Stolas is so fucking into it he creams himself.
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Blitz is so good actually, extremely good in being bold, confident, and sexy. He knows how to unravel Stolas. *cough*
In fact, the moment Blitz catches him, Stolas is smitten and he is down bad.
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To Stolas, this is a big romantic gesture. This is a motherfucking dream come true for Stolas because, "OMG THIS HOT ASS MAN JUST FUCKING SAVED ME!"
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But Blitz isn't a romantic, he's not good at showing romantic affection in small ways, and that's what screws him over.
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Stolas wants and actively seeks the smallest bit of reassurance and comfort that Blitz can provide, whether it be through text and or in other small ways.
This motherfucking birb, this dumbass Prince, even when he has every right to be angry at Blitz for the shit he said to him, still wants Blitz to hold him. In fact, he makes him hold him.
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Stolas is so fucking cute, being all like, "I'm mad at you, but I still demand you hold me."
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"You wanna know what I want? I want to know what it's like, to not be alone. I want to be someone's someone. I want to feel wanted. But like, in a romantic way, like I'm standing out in the rain at a train station and someone is shouting: “Harriet! Don’t get on that train, it’s going to London and I cannot be without you!”
Harriet the Train is a big romantic gesture. Stolas likes big romantic gestures, and Blitz is really good at doing actions that are big and bold.
Blitz has made Stolas feel wanted in The Circus and he makes him feel protected in Seeing Stars. Blitz knows how to be big.
Stolas doesn't need Blitz to perform Harriet the Train, but can he? Oh fuck yes he can.
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"The point is, I just... want someone to care if I stay or go. I want someone to want... me! To want to see me. To hold me. To look at me and think "You're the only one I want!" [sheds tears] "I desire to hold you and talk to you, and never let you feel so..."
This is what Stolas wants from someone right now. He wants to feel wanted in the small ways, he wants to be held, he wants someone to talk to him, to make him feel not so alone.
Right now, at this very moment, Stolas needs the small stuff. He needs the small bits of intimacy that Blitz is not in the right headspace to provide in Apology Tour.
Do you know who gives Stolas what he needs at the moment? Better than Blitzo guy.
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He's smooth and charming in a different way from Blitz. He doesn't even look at Blitz, actually, his eyes are only on Stolas.
"Great song earlier. You have great pipes."
He compliments Stolas on his singing, and Stolas is happy to be given a compliment.
BTB than asks Stolas to dance, and Stolas is both surprised and in disbelief.
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Stolas is so happy and genuinely has an amazing time dancing with BTB, he even goes out of his way to use his wings to give Stolas a spin.
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BTB even performs a big romantic gesture of pulling Stolas into a sloppy wet kiss, to which Stolas happily reciprocates.
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I think both these idiots have the potential to be what the other really needs, and I honestly think with proper communication they can have the most beautiful relationship.
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vidavalor · 1 day ago
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Fun observation! 😊 I feel like I get this or have some ideas on it anyway so I had a bit of a go on it below, if you're interested.
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I think these are two scenes that are contrasting parallels to one another that are not really about Aziraphale's personal feelings regarding touch or his experiences with it but show him being thrown a bit by having more context than the other person in the scene, who is in emotional distress, and being unsure what the best way to care for them in that moment is.
In the Gabriel hug scene, half of Aziraphale's reaction is just shock. He's as floored as we are. Aziraphale doesn't have a problem being touched; he's just like wtf is happening right now??, which is the expression on his face.
This is Gabriel. While Aziraphale has seen hints of Jim before in Gabriel, they've only ever just been hints. The Gabriel that Aziraphale mostly knows wears his suit like it's a suit of armor and is obsessed with crafting his image as someone who is powerful and in control. He does all of those things to stay alive in Heaven. The man in front of Aziraphale in this moment in 2.01, though? He is the complete opposite of that.
Gabriel is stark bollocks naked. In the middle of the street. He's openly friendly, overjoyed to see Aziraphale, vulnerable, and as emotionally naked as much as he is physically so.
By taking out his memories, Gabriel has forgotten Heaven. All his toxic masculinity bullshit and the like is tied up in trying to survive Heaven so once that's been trauma-blocked for him to a point that he can't remember any of it, all that is left is who Gabriel really is at the core-- and that's the guy who has shown up at Aziraphale's door that they name Jim.
Jimbriel is emotionally available and open to a point that was almost unimaginable the last time we saw The Archangel Fucking Gabriel, right? Don Draper has turned into an amnesiac version of Buddy the Elf.
Where Gabriel's political shrewdness ("there are no back channels, Michael") and his sarcasm showed an awareness of social dynamics, those are just gone with Jim, who is earnest and direct with his emotions. Jim says and does what Gabriel has always felt and wanted to say and do but felt he could not without giving away what little power he was trying to cling to in Heaven to stay alive.
Jim was seen in other moments before Gabriel had lost his memory. There is a lot of Jim in the Ineffable Bureaucracy flashback, when Gabriel is able to let his guard down around Beez. Aziraphale has seen hints of Jim's existence when Gabriel carefully joked with him in the bookshop and protected him from Sandalphon. It's those hints that allow Aziraphale to recognize the guy at the door as being Gabriel in distress and let him in.
Before that, though, we just get to enjoy the lunacy of this scene with Aziraphale, and no part of it is as wild as when Gabriel drops the box and gives Aziraphale a big ol' squeezy hug. Why does Aziraphale freeze, unsure what to do with his hands?
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I don't think Aziraphale's response has anything to do with him being unaccustomed to touch. It had to do with him being in shock as to what the actual fuck??? is happening and, even more importantly, his concern over what the best way to care for Gabriel in this moment would be.
First is the shock of what is happening: there are several hundred people watching and filming this. Gabriel is vulnerable here in a way that the person Aziraphale knows would never, ever want to be. His memory appears to be gone and he's full Hamm in the middle of Whickber Street. This is in addition to Aziraphale himself being a private person and introverted and, even if he weren't, this is all just completely bonkers. Gabriel is a person that Aziraphale perceived as having a lot of power in Heaven. He doesn't really know that Gabriel is as trapped as he and Crowley are, though he suspects it a bit. His and Crowley's last encounter with Gabriel was less than pleasant and now Gabriel's here, after something terrible has clearly happened to him, hugging him on the doorstep in front of the entire neighborhood.
Aziraphale isn't just considering what might happen if Gabriel got his memories back, was embarrassed by this, and took that out on Aziraphale. Being Aziraphale, he's more concerned about the fact that Gabriel is hugging him but doesn't seem like he's in a place, emotionally or mentally, to really be able to make a call on whether or not this hug is something he truly wants.
I feel for Aziraphale here because I think that he did have issues in the past with being held, if not exactly with giving other people a hug. (He didn't usually volunteer those hugs but could awkwardly return them.) He struggled with thinking he didn't need it because he should be above it. Crowley helped him with that, though. Aziraphale sometimes has issues with anything that feels like it's about him because he's excessively self-sacrificing but we've seen that he is comfortable about touch with Crowley. He reaches out to him several times in S2 in a way that shows they have an understood, mutually consensual familiarity where that's concerned.
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Crowley might be a little unaccustomed to being petted in the pub lol but that's just because it's a public setting. In a bit of a twist to the kiss scene you're talking about where Aziraphale takes that moment before he puts his hand on Crowley's shoulder, there are a whole bunch of other scenes in S2 where Aziraphale keeps touching Crowley's shoulder or his arm with a casual intimacy that shows he does it all the time. (Not to mention the comfort with one another that The Wall Slam in S1 shows.) They also each mime a kiss at different times at one another in S2 (Aziraphale after "very nice" and The Apology Dance; Crowley in the back room after "don't you want to hear my plan?"), showing that kissing is not new to them.
Aziraphale takes Crowley by the shoulder in the magic shop in 1941; he holds him up and helps him walk in 1827 (also reaches for his hips to try to steady him earlier in the minisode); he reaches for him in 2.06 in the above gif; and, in the scene below, Aziraphale reaches with intuitive, practiced ease to touch Crowley-- while standing so close to Crowley that it makes it apparent that Aziraphale is very used to being that much into Crowley's personal space when they're in the bookshop.
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Crowley only leans back away from it because, as we can see from his darting eyes, he's not sure how he feels about them being that open in front of Gabriel. The fact that there's even this scene, though, where Aziraphale is shown to be so used to being so close to Crowley that, if Crowley hadn't leaned back, he would have basically been in his arms, is showing that they are allowed by one another to touch and hold each other.
So, Aziraphale's response to Gabriel hugging him isn't about touch in general-- it's about what was happening in that specific moment. This is where it gets into areas relating to boundaries and consent.
Even though it's Gabriel who initiated this hug, there's something so off about Gabriel that he doesn't appear to be in a mental place to really be making this decision. Gabriel is in obvious distress in a way that is so at odds with what Aziraphale knows of his personality that while Gabriel, in this moment, is expressing that he wants to hug Aziraphale, Aziraphale doesn't really know that Gabriel, on the whole, would want to do that.
This is why I think Aziraphale doesn't even really sort of try to pat Gabriel's shoulder or something. He doesn't know what to do with his hands because while his heart sees Gabriel and says, around the shock of what's going on that, whatever has happened to Gabriel, the poor guy probably does really need a hug, the rest of Aziraphale is concerned that he doesn't have enough context about what's happened to Gabriel to be able to judge whether or not Gabriel is in a good enough headspace to be making this call.
One rather enormous contextual clue to that is the fact that he's buck ass naked in the middle of the street 😂 which is clueing Aziraphale into the fact that maybe Gabriel isn't in the best place to be making decisions about stuff like this right now.
It's also been Aziraphale's experience that Heaven takes memories of angels who have fallen through the ranks or fallen to Hell and that, while they don't know exactly what's happened, odds seem good that this might be what's happened to Gabriel. It seems wild to Aziraphale because Gabriel is The Supreme Archangel but it's possible and, whatever's happened to him, it's clear that he ran afoul of The Metatron in some way and has been harmed in the process.
Gabriel has experienced something traumatizing, in other words-- maybe even so traumatizing that it's the reason why he can't remember anything. He's naked and acting unusual and unusually emotional so Aziraphale knows Gabriel's not really in a place to be deciding whether or not he wants touch or not. He might very well really want to be hugged-- I think he did, as his day was pretty shit so far and Aziraphale is cuddly lol-- but he and Aziraphale have exactly zero prior understanding where boundary lines are around touch-- in general or when one of them is distressed-- are concerned.
He doesn't touch Gabriel or lightly hug him back because he feels he doesn't really have Gabriel's permission to do so, and he's correct. He doesn't. Gabriel isn't in a place to decide whether or not this hug is something he's going to want to have happened down the line.
I think that the Gabriel we have as of the end of 2.06 is probably appreciative of the fact that Aziraphale didn't touch him during that hug because it showed that Aziraphale cared about Gabriel's comfort and didn't want to touch him without that being something that Gabriel, when of sound mind, had permitted. I'm sure that Gabriel is also embarrassed about having just glomped onto Aziraphale. Not even just because of the whole naked, vulnerable, Jim-ness of it all but because he put Aziraphale on the spot and was too out of it to consider Aziraphale's comfort level with what was happening.
Gabriel really should have asked Aziraphale if he could hug him but, mixed up from his missing memories, he assumed they already knew one another and that, since he just knew to come to the bookshop, that it must be because he and Aziraphale already knew each other well. What makes this situation different from the one in 2.06 during The Kiss scene with Crowley is that Aziraphale and Crowley have a completely different level of intimacy and familiarity than Aziraphale and Gabriel did.
Crowley and Aziraphale have body swap-levels of intimacy and have preestablished understandings of what is permitted between them and in a state of distress. I did a post about what I think is happening in The Kiss scene, in terms of why Aziraphale reacts the way he does, and there is context to the happenings in that scene that Aziraphale had that Crowley was missing that I think impact Aziraphale's response to the kiss. You can read about in that post, if you're interested. In addition to that, though, Aziraphale isn't sure about responding to the kiss because Crowley has been so emotionally up and down over the prior few minutes that, kind of like with Gabriel in 2.01 but in a different way, Aziraphale isn't sure that Crowley is in a headspace to have decided this kiss is really what he wants.
From Aziraphale's perspective, Crowley was missing all night. He came back trailed by archangels and Aziraphale doesn't know what happened the prior night. Aziraphale has seen behavior that is very off for Crowley since he returned, which I also looked at in that post. Crowley not going with him with "The Metatron" and Crowley not seeming to see "The Metatron" as a threat are things that are way, way off for Crowley and indicate that, while he might otherwise seem fine, he's really not fully in a good mental state.
This is all before they even start talking in That Scene and then Crowley is all over the place, emotionally. He was in tears just prior to this kiss. Aziraphale thinks he understands, intellectually, why Crowley comes back to kiss him (he gets about half of it-- the emotional reasons why but not the plot reasons why and, yeah, there's a plot reason) but he's not sure about returning this kiss for similar reasons to why he wasn't sure about returning Gabriel's hug.
Crowley has permission to touch/hug/kiss Aziraphale so he's not violating any preestablished boundary here by doing so. He is doing so while distressed, though, and Aziraphale is concerned about doing the right thing by Crowley in this moment. He wants to kiss him; he's just not sure that Crowley really wants to kiss him right now and isn't just doing so because he's upset. When Crowley holds on a bit, Aziraphale has to decide what to do and he eventually sort of gently responds. He kisses him a little; he runs a hand over his shoulder. It's because he wants to comfort him and he knows from their long history that he has permission to gently do that-- their car and their bookshop and all that-- but he won't turn this thing into some wild, passionate kiss because, to Aziraphale, that would be taking advantage of Crowley.
The point is that, even though Crowley and Gabriel have wildly different levels of intimacy in their different types of relationships with Aziraphale, both Gabriel and Crowley are reaching out for different types of physical touch while in distress after being harmed and Aziraphale, both times, is just trying to figure out the best way to acknowledge their pain and provide comfort while also not crossing any lines that might make either of them feel later on that they were taken advantage of when they were vulnerable. It's why Aziraphale is a very trustworthy person-- he is sensitive to and cognizant of this stuff with everyone.
Something that I’ve noticed, and I don’t know what it means. But did anyone else notice how Aziraphale’s (present day) opening scene in season 2 involves him being embraced and he has no idea what to do with his hands:
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…which is then mirrored by his (almost) last scene where he is being embraced and he doesn’t know what to do with his hands:
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WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?!
I mean, in the last scene Aziraphale does grab onto Crowley for a brief moment (and I’ve written more about why that may be here). But just putting these two scenes side by side is making me wonder what deeper meaning there could be.
Would love to hear your thoughts on the matter! What does everyone else think this means?
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angelpuns · 2 days ago
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“ I've eaten bigger birds than you for lunch, is that all you got?” Leo chuckled, hopping backwards as one of the thugs slashed at him. A lie, since he quite literally had run away from said ‘bigger guy’ just a little bit ago, but these mutant thugs wouldn't know that. 
He’d stopped running when he realized those guys weren't following him, hopping down into an alley to see if he could find something to wear for the time being. It was still chilly, even as the sun was rising into the sky, and he wasn't sure how long he'd be out here. 
After all, he'd yet to come up with a good plan. 
All three of thugs were some kind of birds, though obviously Leo didn’t have the time or care to identify them. 
The one attacking him screeched and slashed at him again with knife-sharp claws, barely missing his plastron. He could probably take these guys, but he had also just woken up, been ran out of his home and was fucking freezing. 
Time for plan B. 
“ As pheasant as it was talking with you, this is starting to get hawk-ward,” 
He dodged another swipe and opened a portal, giving the oversized birds a quick salute as he stepped into it, 
“ so I'm gonna go ahead and duck out while I still ca-”
He was cut off by a screech and the painful tug of one of the thugs grabbing his leg just before he made it into the portal. 
It wrenched him out with a grip far stronger than he thought it'd be, the creature flinging him into the nearest wall with a CRACK!. 
His shoulder burned with pain, a thin line of blood oozing down from a scratch there. He barely had a moment to cover it before he was slammed back into the wall, face pressed into the gritty bricks. That was gonna leave a mark for sure, especially because he was missing his mask. 
His swords were on the ground, just next to his feet but still just a little too far too reach. 
“ H-hey, don't get your feathers ruffled, guys!” He chuckled, fear creeping unto his chest. This felt a little too familiar. Like the leftover sensations of his nightmare were creeping into reality. 
The thug holding him scoffed and pressed harder, sharp talons pressing into his scales. 
“ all turtles this fuckin’ talkative or just you?” 
Leo swallowed. Shit, what was he gonna do? No swords, and he was never really good at hand to hand combat. If he could just…
“ Hey, I'm the only talkin' turtle out there,” he tried to sound convincing, even if then hulking creature in his bedroom had been vaguely turtle-shaped, “ your whole flock as fowl-mouthed as you?”
That earned him another slam into the bricks, and a harder squeeze. Blood trickled down his face and into his eye, Leo blinking hard to try and clear it. He inches his right foot closer to his sword, if he could just distract him enough to break free…
He was starting to feel a bit lightheaded, though, and one more slam could easily be a concussion if he wasn't careful. Or worse. And trying to get home like that would be…yikes. So he had to time it just right. 
“ Hey, what do you call-”
The joke has barely left his beak when something slammed into the thug, taking him down in an instant. There was a flash of red, purple and orange, and Leo quickly grabbed his swords.  Whatever it was, they acted so fast he could barely keep up. Shit, maybe he already had a concussion. He hated treating those, keeping himself awake through’em was like torture!
He hurried to make a portal, turning to thank whoever it was, only to see the same hulking creature and the only slightly familiar faces of the two other guys from his room earlier. 
He went cold from head to toe, falling backwards into the portal and letting it take him wherever it took him. He couldn't go home, they were following him. 
Tracking him! But how - he has portaled, he had- 
Leo swallowed as he landed firmly on his bed - despite not wanting to go home - and a new dread filled his stomach. 
They must have put some kind of tracker on him while he slept. He sat up, the motion making him dizzy. 
How the hell was he gonna get out of thus one?
-----
More of this unnamed au :)
I don't like writing fight/action scenes so this one ended up being pretty short, but I hope y'all like it nonetheless ;)
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
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the-real-dannix · 1 day ago
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Honestly, I know I'm late to the party but the Bats are legit scary. They push their bodies to inhuman extremes and have no powers to speak of. Like, we joke about Dick being boneless but the kind of flexibility he had requires hours of daily upkeep. And most of the other Robins and former Robins aren't actually that far behind him.
They can all hack some. Oracle is the best obs followed but Tim, but they can all do it. And they're ok is better than most of the others on their teams.
They all know enough biochem to survive Gotham and then some.
Their first aid is almost as good as or better then your average EMT.
They're quiet. Doesn't matter if we're talking Daddy Bats and Hood or Wing and the Robins. They can and will sneak up on supers on a regular basis regardless of their size.
And honestly? The no-kill line? That's so much harder than just killing because you don't need the same level of control if you don't care about your opponent surviving. But if you do, you have to know your limits and know the human body and know exactly how much force you need and how much you're using. Which is so much harder.
Losing a super to mind control or just straight up frenzy is scary. Losing a bat is defcon 4 because bats have actively trained to take down supers and metas.
And the worse part? All the suppression tech and kryptonite in the world won't stop them. Even the most secure facility can't hold them.
The Bats are fucking terrifying.
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theealbatross · 2 days ago
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Headcannon: Sebastian takes care of people
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Tags: fluff, kinda low self esteem, kinda unhealthy codependency, short read had to get it out of my head
He takes care of strangers
Like silly little first years lost in the moving stairs, albeit with a frown and a sharp lecture about the dangers of walking around the castle and being too prideful to carry a map when they could barely locate their dorm rooms, firmly putting a quick end to older students' teasing when their jokes cross a line, and even ending up as the reluctant volunteer tutor (live training dummy) for Defense Against the Dark Arts after Professor Hecat assigned him the role to complete his detention.
This, in turn, makes him surprisingly popular with the kids to his bewilderment as they gravitate toward their grumpy but reliable senior.
"Have a good day, Sebastian!"
Both of you frown in confusion at the gaggle of cheerful first-year Hufflepuffs who eagerly greet him as you pass the halls. One even waved at him before they turned into a corner.
"What was that?"
He shrugs. "Hell if I know."
He takes care of his friends
"Amitt! Watch out!"
The Ravenclaw could barely turn to the familiar booming voice before he was shoved to the ground.
"Hey! You aren't allowed in the field!"
"Are you alright, Amitt?" He realizes the concerned voice of his friend, Sebastian, brought him out of his stupor. And in his hand is the bludger that nearly had an intimate interaction with the back of his head.
"Oh! Sebastian! Many thanks! I didn't know Slytherin practices ran this late. I was on my way to the top of the bleachers -- the best views of the summer night sky, I tell you."
"Thakkar, you don't have permission to be here!"
Sebastian rolls his eyes, feeling Amitt's anxiety rising as Slytherin quidditch players land one after another, looming over him. "Back off, all of you. He nearly got hurt. I'll handle it."
"But --"
"My apologies everyone! I truly meant no harm --"
"The captain's right, Sallow. Who knows if those Ravenclaws are using this nerd over here to spy on us --"
"I said back off, Thorncrest," Sebastian turned his back on Amitt to face all of his teammates, daring any of them to take another step. "The next time you ignore my orders, I'll stop using words since they can't seem to penetrate through your skull. So you either learn to play nice or I won't let it pass that it was because of your subpar performance that a bludger almost hit my friend."
Sebastian and the other Slytherin student glared at each other until Imelda smacked Thorncrest's head, cutting through the tension. "Listen to your Vice-Captain," he turns to Sebastian with a nod. "I'll take care of him, you get Thakkar out of here."
Sebastian nodded back at Imelda, ensuring everyone was back in the skies before turning to a guilty-looking Amitt.
"I'm sorry, Sebastian. I did not think I would cause such a disturbance."
Sebastian just waved him off with a friendly chuckle and a comforting hand on his shoulder. Amitt can't believe his fellow Ravenclaws don't believe him when he tells them Sebastian is a warm person, laughing to his face was just quite rude. To be fair, they could barely believe they were friends at all. "Don't worry about it, athletes are assholes during Quidditch season."
He looked sheepish, "Can I still go up the bleachers?"
Despite his subdued character, Sebastian can see that Amitt has all the determination in the world when it comes to achieving the things that interest him the most. Maybe that's why he liked the Ravenclaw boy so much. "Yeah, go ahead, Amitt. Just don't let any prefect see you."
"Ah! Thank you, my friend! I shall be as quiet as a mouse!"
Sebastian waved as Amitt haphazardly said his goodbyes.
"If anybody bothers you tell them to talk to me!"
He takes care of Ominis
Despite his great interest in the dark arts and his pure-blooded status, Sebastian will take any and every opportunity to fight Ominis' family. He hates them simply because they hurt his friend, which is unforgivable in his eyes. He had every opportunity to get in their good graces but he blew all of that to pieces when he got in a crude fight with the eldest son of the Gaunts the moment he called Ominis a 'useless cripple'.
From then on, Sebastian has been banned from the Gaunt's estate indefinitely.
"Yeah, they better fucking ban me or I'll burn that haunted house to the ground and lock that prick inside of it."
Despite himself and his pacifistic tendencies, Ominis couldn't but scoff out a laugh while Sebastian nursed a bloody lip, glaring at the gates of the manor as it closed on them. "You didn't need to do that."
"I don't think I did enough," he sneers, blood boiling at the fact that Ominis seemed used to their cruel words. Not wanting to fester on their cruel treatment, he throws his hands across Ominis' shoulders. "Who the hell wants to spend Christmas there anyway? Feldcroft is way more cozy."
Ominis smiled, patting Sebastian's back, the closest 'thank you' he could show now that he knew he had found a true friend. "You're right," He thinks of Anne, Solomon's bland stew, and the blinking lights of the Sallow home.
"Are you alright?" And Sebastian -- kind, true, painfully loyal. His first friend.
Ominis nods.
"Let's go home."
He takes care of his family.
Even though Anne no longer communicates with him after 'the incident' Sebastian still religiously sends letters to Beauxbatons Academy along with whatever trinkets he finds that remind him of her. And even though he detested Solomon and barely felt bad about his death, he still made a point to clean his grave, knowing the old man didn't like it when things were messy, and even emptied his favorite whiskey on his birthday.
"Seb?"
He blinks as you slip your hands into his. He squeezes it, letting the heat on your skin ground him as the two of you stare at the gravestone. Just as remorseful guilt creeps into your heart, he cuts it off. "I don't regret it, you know," he mutters firmly. "He almost ... he was hurting Anne. He was going to hurt you."
You nod, leaning your forehead on his shoulders, trying to comfort him through his quiet struggles knowing words or pieces of advice won't help.
"But I know he did his best. It wasn't enough but it was his best," he empties the other half of the whiskey on the grave, and his grip on you tightens. "I owe him this much."
He takes care of you.
"Avada Kedavra!"
Sebastian flinches awake at the recent memory, his breath shaky as he looks around the dim light of the Room of Requirement.
He did what he had to do, he knows this. Solomon has been eaten up by his own anger, if he didn't stop him ... Merlin knows what would've happened.
If the three of you had gotten out of that fight alive, with your participation in his insipid plans, it wasn't unlikely that Solomon would ship you off to Azkaban with him. That can't happen, he dragged you into that hellhole, he had to get you out of there unscathed.
No matter how high the cost.
"S-Sebastian?"
He sits up from the couch, surprised to see you awake on the open door that leads to your personalized bedroom. The two of you had holed up in your safe haven after the events of the night but it would seem rest evaded the two of you.
"I can't ..." you sigh shakily, biting your lips. "I can't sleep. I'm scared."
As if your fear had overpowered his own, he swiftly set aside the last traces of his fear and guilt, extending his hands, which you eagerly took. Sebastian pulls you in his lap, preceding any thought of impropriety as he curls himself around you, letting you bury your face in the crook of his neck while he covers the two of you in your blanket.
"It's all going to be all right," he promises, pressing his lips on the crown of your hair. "I won't let anything happen to you."
And takes care of you.
"Hey, Sebastian is waiting for you in the common room."
"Sallow said he'll pick you up after class."
"She's not coming, Sebastian's got her."
"Your hound is here."
You turned with a frown from Imelda to what she was staring at with a mischievous grin and by the door stood Sebastian, smiling when your eyes met.
"I --"
"-- have to go," Imelda playfully rolled her eyes. You gave her a smile as you gathered your books.
"Same time next week?"
"Maybe let's hide somewhere your hound can't sniff you up?"
"Get your own witch, Reyes," a deep voice from behind proved her point. Sebastian grabbed your book and satchel from your hands, hooking it on one arm, and the other gently offered his free hand to yours. "This one's mine."
And wants to take care of you forever.
"You should marry me."
Your next step faltered as you turned to Sebastian on the shore of the Black Lake, the setting sun illuminating his face and the vulnerability and determination written across it.
"W-What?"
"I've thought about it," he swallows, walking closer until he is right in front of you, the cold shallow water above your ankles a welcome reprieve from your burning body at such an announcement. "I've thought about letting you go, letting you find someone better than me. "
"Sebastian --"
"But I figured that I'm a selfish man. I always have been. And I want you more than anything else," you shudder at his fervor. "I love you more than anything else in this world."
Gently, as he always does, he took your hand, placing it on his warm cheek. "I can't offer much, I know, but I ... I will make you the sun my world will revolve on."
He presses a kiss at your palm, a warm tear falls from your eyes.
"Marry me," he begs. "Let me be the one to make you happy."
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junedenim · 2 days ago
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wrap my head around it all
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a whole new thing
warnings: it's just fluff
word count: 3k
You're eating a bagel. He's drinking a cup of coffee. There's an ache that's been relieved. It feels this way whenever he comes home and he's been home for a month now but he still feels just how good this is, looking across at you as you scarf down a bagel so quickly he fears you'll choke.
"It isn't going anywhere." He chuckles at his own joke. He's ashamed of himself, you don't have to tell him.
And you know that. You wipe your hands on a napkin and throw your head back with a groan. "I'm so hungry."
He grins. "Do you want me to get you another one?"
You hum in thought, taking your time like you're concentrating on solving world hunger. Then, you sigh, your shoulders slumping as your hands return to what remains of your bagel. "No. I'll spoil lunch."
He chuckles and rests his head in the palm of his left hand. His gaze is soft and relaxed, focused on you. "I hate to break it to you but we're way past noon. That is your lunch."
You whine and rub the cream cheese off the corners of your mouth. "Fine. Then, I'm spoiling dinner. How would your parents like it if I didn't eat anything?"
He laughs at your worry and picks up his cup of coffee, dragging a sip from it. "I think they'll understand. Plus, I highly doubt you won't be hungry by dinner time."
Your shoulders slump as you chew the remains of your bagel. "I know, it's dreadful. This constant state of hunger I've been forced into."
"We all appreciate it," Alex assures, hiding his amusement from your frustration. "At least you're not retching every 20 minutes."
You lean back in your chair and drop the dirty napkin with the rest of your bagel's trash. "Small favours, huh?"
"Do you want me to get you another one?" Alex offers again. His attentiveness to you has only grown through the years. Perhaps, now, it's at an all-time high. But he likes being able to take care of you. It's the least he can do.
You shake your head. "No, I'd like to walk around a little now." It's cold, windy, and slightly raining. People are rushing into the cafe from the cold, but you want to walk around in it. He supposes there is where you lose him but he'll tighten his coat, put on a hat, and slip on some gloves if it's what you want. Besides, if it'll stop you complaining about how hot the cafe is then he can't complain.
He fixes the askew hat on your head and opens the door for you. As you two walk down the street, he places his hands in his pockets, forming a loop of his arms. You slip your arm through it, tugging him close, brushing your side up against his. "It's going to rain all week," Alex comments on the weather patterns.
"I like it when it rains." You are smiling through the gloom. In that smile, there's a lifetime of love and it is so strange that it feels so normal for him to feel this way. It was never a gradual thing. It was sudden the first time you talked to one another and he felt that he could reach out to you and you would never push him away. Silver lining is cheesy but all that tension he builds throughout his life is somehow relieved in the glimmer of your teeth.
The mundanity is the craziest. Everything felt like it had to be a big show of things. He had to slick back his hair and play make-believe in every moment but now, it's a sigh of relief. To come home to someone—to come home to you and not have to play pretend anymore. To roll out of bed and not have to decide who to play today, instead, decide where to go for breakfast.
Maybe it's getting older, but he thinks it lies in learning the importance of caring for someone else. He always has with his friends and family and past girlfriends but there's something different here. It's him relinquishing himself to that, allowing you to look after him. To wake up and find you've made coffee or come home and find you've bought him a new shirt. It's simple. Doing the laundry, cooking dinner, grocery shopping. It's so dull but in fact the greatest thing ever. That feeling has only grown as of late.
"Where are we walking to?" He asks.
You shrug and look over at him. "I don't know. We could...window shop or...," you think, tapping your finger on your chin, "go to the park or—"
"In the rain?" He questions, an eyebrow raised.
You smile and lean closer to him. Something you know gets him all twisted up around your finger, and you are willing to do anything you decide. "Why not?"
"Because I don't want to," he reasons, but the grin is already playing on his lips and light chuckles ripple through him as your lips grow closer and closer until you're hovering over his.
"Fine," you decide, shocking him.
"Really?"
"Yeah. I'm cold," you declare. You cuddle closer to him all pouty. It's the way you've been as of late whether the cold of winter or your hormones. "Let's go baby shopping."
"Baby shopping?"
"Yeah, we haven't really done it yet and we could look for cute itty bitty baby clothes," you reason.
The baby is new. Or rather the pregnancy. It's the reason for dinner with his parents. It wasn't planned but it wasn't unplanned. You'd been together for years, married for two, and, well, you, him, and baby makes three. 
You found out a couple of weeks ago. It's changed things for him with the whole caring thing. He's always cared, obviously, but now he finds himself interested in every little aspect of the pregnancy. He'd never thought he'd be that guy who reads the books and talks to your stomach (which you don't know about, he's too embarrassed to do it while you're awake), but things change and he'd never thought he'd be a father but here he is walking into a baby clothing store to buy clothes for his—well, your—baby. 
He still hasn't processed the whole "baby" part of things. He knows there will be a baby but he can't yet imagine having the baby. You being pregnant doesn't even quite feel real yet. You're barely showing and he only feels it might be real when he talks to it. That feels weird to call it it. But he's tried calling it he or she but that's a mouthful. You don't like him calling it it so he started calling it names. 
First, it was normal. "Mary," "John," "Elizabeth," "James," but you didn't like that either because the baby didn't have a name. The baby hasn't even developed that part of them yet. So, he calls it "tot," "bug," "pumpkin," and his personal favorite, "the fetus." You're not sure why but he makes him laugh. Maybe it's the boyish part of him that still thinks boobies are the coolest thing ever.
"Should we really buy clothes if we don't know the gender yet?" He asks as you search through the girlish items.
"A baby isn't modeling for the cover of Vogue. We just need to find an outfit to take the baby home in. A hat and a onesie." You pick up a cute pink one with little pink bows printed across it. "Look how cute and small this one is."
"What if it's a boy?"
You roll your eyes. "Real men wear pink, you know that better than anyone."
He chuckles. "Touché."
You point the onesie back and state, "Besides, we're probably going to have a girl anyway. My family is filled with girls."
"Well, my family has guys," Alex points out.
"What? You?" You laugh at him. "Yes, statistically your parents did have 100% guys."
"Shut up," he mutters as he comes closer and lands a kiss on you. There are the moments that count, that are embedded and embossed deep into his mind. They are small but mighty. It's right up there with shopping for a new shower curtain. It's stupid but it's real. Arguing over whether it should be flowers or ducks (he really wanted the ducks for some reason). You compromised with polka dots, not that that part matters much. It was more doing it with you. He doesn't know why other than it's fun and he loves you. 
You move further down the aisle, looking through bees, princesses, and truck designs. "The baby will be born in August. What screams August to you?"
"Sweat," he replies.
"Be serious," you urge him, your eyes staring strongly at him. He can feel the pupil blaze through him like a laser.
"I am," he says, "I think of sweating, the heat, sun."
"Aw," you coo as a smile grows on your lips. "Cute little suns and if we have a son then it'll be like son and sun. Get it?"
He smiles down at you, struggling to process all of this. "Yeah, I get it." A son, a daughter, a child. It knocks him off his feet. He gets hit with these waves. It's nerves but it's also excitement. The idea that a baby will be in that small onesie. A part of him will be in the world, running off, getting into nonsense. He has a few years until that. Hopefully, he'll catch up by then.
You buy the onesie with suns on it and leave after that. There will be plenty of time to spend plenty more money at the store but for now, you head to the bookstore next door. It's small with aching floors and dusty shelves. You're just trying to kill time until dinner and this seems like a good place to start.
You drag him by hand to the children's book section because despite it being another few years until the baby can read, but you like the idea of reading to the baby every night, even if they can't understand a word of what you're saying. Between Madeline and The Giving Tree, you say, "You know, these are the last couple of months of our lives, it'll be just the two of us."
He picks up Curious George, distracting himself by looking through the pictures. "You say that like you want me to panic."
"No," you assure him, placing your hands on his shoulder, giving them a squeeze. "This is such a special time in our lives. We'll never experience something like this again. Shopping for our baby, nervous, scared, anxious, happy, excited. And I get to do it all with you."
He shakes his head and puts Curious George back on the shelf, turning to you. "You really have a gift."
"What?" You ask eagerly.
Alex takes your hands off his shoulders and squeezes them. "Nothing. You just always know how to make me feel better."
"I know it's hard for you to believe but it goes both ways. I'm panicking too, you know? I have to push a whole human being out of me."
"I know. How selfish am I to be the one who's scared."
"No. It's perfectly reasonable. It's a life-changing thing that'll cry, poop, pee, and spit all over you. I guess, I just take comfort in knowing I have you to hold my hand."
He takes a deep breath and tries to let the stress go. "You're going make me cry next to Harold and the Purple Crayon."
"Well, this is my way of guilting you into changing all the diapers so it works out pretty good."
Alex then gets carried away by a Batman Lego set and despite the knowledge that it can't be anywhere near a child until it's no longer a choking hazard. Perhaps, it's more for Alex than the baby. He doesn't get it because he doesn't want to carry it around for the rest of the day but he's not saying he won't come back for it.
You leave with Harold and the Purple Crayon for memory's sake. The rain has stopped but the wind is still cold and the pavement is soaked wet with puddles. You huddle close together once again.
Alex asks, "Are you cool with the whole giving birth thing?"
You laugh at him. "I don't have much of a choice. Why? Do you want to try?"
"If I could, I would."
"No, you wouldn't, but I appreciate the sentiment. Besides, it's kind of cool. A special thing that only I get to experience. I mean, the thing is growing in me, that's crazy but cool."
"Yeah, the tot is a part of you."
You hum. "I want french fries."
He smiles. "Okay. I could go for a burger."
Fast food being on every corner does have its conveniences. McDonald's is warm, separating you from the world's chill. "My mother had short labours. How long was your mother in labour for?"
"I don't know. You can ask her at dinner."
"I'm definitely getting an epidural. I don't care if it slows the process down. You know I'm in pain from just a headache. I wouldn't survive natural labour."
"Good thing for modern medicine."
"If it was the 1800s you could just give me a bunch of morphine and knock me out."
"I'll tell them to have some ready for you."
You sit in a booth that is mildly sticky but he'll ignore it if it'll ease your feet. He bought the large fries with the intention of it being shared between the two of you but instead, you take it for yourself. He enjoys his burger.
"We should have gotten a Happy Meal," you joke, dipping the fry into the ketchup pile. 
He smiles because despite being freaked out 99% of the time, the 1%—the idea of doing things like this, buying a Happy Meal for his kid—outweighs it all. "Yeah, would've gotten a cool toy too."
"Well, as long as you eat your apple slices." You smile up at him and he blushes. He's been with you for so long and yet he still gets flushed under your gaze, lost in your eyes, falling in love over and over again. It's cheesy and cliche, but that doesn't make it untrue.
He steals a fry away and asks, "What should we name the tot?"
You shake your head. "No clue. Is it weird that that is what terrifies me the most?"
"No, they're going to carry it around with them for their whole life. It's the first major life decision we’ll make for them. Well, after, you know, making them."
You giggle at him with a mouthful of fries. "Yeah. If it's a boy should we name it after you?"
"God no." There doesn't need to be another Alex Turner in the world. That would make things far too confusing.
"What about for a middle name?"
"Nah, the kid is already getting my last name."
"Should we go away? Like a babymoon or whatever it's called?" You ask.
"Sure, if it's anything like our honeymoon." You went to Bora Bora. You didn't see much of Bora Bora. It was your hotel and the water pretty much of which Alex insisted on giving an equal show of things, which you'd be mildly embarrassed by if you weren't so turned on by it. Besides, you came back with no tan lines.
"Shut up," you wish upon him.
He laughs because he really is just a teenage boy who still finds sex to be funny. But it's a lovely sight to see with the crinkle by his eyes and the smile lines forming. You always like him like this. He can be moody and pensive a lot of the time. When he laughs, it feels like he fully lets go, if only for a moment. 
"Where would we go?" He asks.
"A cottage in the woods or something. I don't know. I might be too pregnant to fly by the time we do it."
"You're going to be so cute with a belly."
"Please don't turn into some pregnancy fetishist, Alex," you warn him.
And, no, he won't be going up to pregnant women on the street and asking to touch their bellies but there is something inherently attractive about you being pregnant. It's probably some biological design.
"I can't help it if I want to fuck you."
"Alex!" You scold looking around the McDonald's in shame. Much wilder things have been said in places like this but you still turn red whenever he gets suggestive, especially in this vulgar way like some need has overtaken him and he needs to have you right now. Like he'll take you on the red paint-chipped table. 
He chuckles and bites into his burger. So nonchalant in every way like nothing affects him. It's easy for him to be casual about these things. He's pretty sure a corner of his brain is thinking about things like that all the time. He's pretty sure he thinks of your boobs every night before bed and wakes up thinking about your ass. Again, he's pretty sure it's that inherent biological man thing.
"In a couple of months, you'll be so pumped full of hormones you'll want me to fuck you in the bathroom of this place."
You reach across the table and start smacking him but he just laughs more and more, getting a real kick of this. "Will you shut up?" Truthfully, you kind of want to go jump his bones now.
*
a/n: sigh, just a little something for now. trying to write more but my finals have been a bitch. but winter break is soon...
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