#like Alfred coming out to Arthur and admitting he’s had a crush on him since forever

[fireandspiceland]

cw: buildup leading to cousin incest

Alfred and his brother and parents visiting family for holidays or whatever and his aunt tells him his older cousin Arthur, that he’s always though of as the cool one compared to his other even older cousins, is upstairs in his room so Alfred runs up the stairs and barely knocks on the door too excited that he’s finally seeing Arthur again except he runs into Arthur hunched over in his desk chair one with one earbud in hand frantically pumping his cock while theres a gay porn video playing on his computer

[hetalia-has-a-secretary]

Can you write something where the shyest boys finally kiss their crush at a party in a human au. But then some other mischievous character catches it on camera. Then they try to show it to everyone to tease them? (Not really maliciously more playfully. More like a trickster.) Sorry, but I am a sucker for shy characters since I am shy myself.

So my shy boys in my human AU are Japan, Canada, Russia and England (I'd put Romano but he's just a lone wolf who tends to bite when he's disturbed. Metaphorically.)

A/N: I HIT ONE OF MY NOTIFICATION POP UPS AND IT FORCED ME OUT OF THE FIRST DRAFT! I had to redo Japan and Canada's scenerios •́ J ,•̀

Human AU: Shy Boys kiss their crush! On TAPE!?

Japan:

He wasn't really enjoying the party Alfred was throwing. The only reason he was there was over the fact he promised to record some footage for a homemade music video, and he knew his crush was going to be there.

At some point he found himself watching his crush as they danced away with their friends. Was it kind of creepy? Yes. Did Kiku realize this at the moment? No.

He just about jumped out of his skin as his crush made eye contact with him, and his heartbeat quickened as they started dancing towards him.

"Hey Kiku! I thought you didn't like parties?"

"H-hai! I do not usually partake in such events, but I promised Alfred I'd get footage for one of his YouTube videos..."

His crush's head tilted, not hearing him through the loud music and talking. Even with him shouting he wasn't loud enough. So naturally he had them follow him to the porch.

He could have sworn that every star in the night sky was reflecting in his crush's eyes as they were waiting for him to repeat his anwser.

"I have to admit to some urges that have been occuring..." (Not what he was hoping he'd say)

Kiku cringed at his wording, and cursed himself for cramming so many english classes in before he transferred to America. He only calmed back down after hearing his crush laugh and egg him on to continue.

"I... kisu si te ii desu ka?" (Can I kiss you?)

Even though he was rather nervous, he was pretty close with his crush. During their lunches they asked him to teach them japanese so they can help him with translations. Even after two years they still had trouble with it.

"... What about a kiss? oh! Did you kiss someone at the party!"

His face turned red, and he shook it rapidly.

"No! You!"

"What do I have to do with a kiss and you- Oh!"

Kiku covered his face as his crush slowly caught on to his question. Soon enough they had taken his hands away, and lightly pecked his lips.

Flash.

That looked like the flash of a camera. Sure enough Alfred and England were standing at the doorway, polaroid camera in hand. Al being his usual loud self.

"I saw you bring them out here and just KNEW something was going to happen! Didn't I tell you, you had it in you! Now the whole class must know of your bravery!"

By the time Alfred finished his speech, Kiku was already after him. Sadly he was no match for Al's speed due to tripping over everyone, and everything.

Canada:

It wasn't like he was exactly shy, but he didn't have many friends since not many people in his class had much in common with him. His only real friend was his crush, so of course he was terrified to ruin that friendship. Though the constant jokes the others at the party made didn't help, since most of it revolved around them dating.

He was also getting more and more frustrated with the amount of attention his crush was getting. Some of it they welcomed with open arms, some of it not so much. The thing that really annoyed him was seeing Alfred himself flirt with them.

This was the final straw that gave him the courage to walk up to him, and accuse him directly.

"Why are you flirting with my date?"

"Date? I thought you said they were just a friend?"

Mathew had turned his head towards his crush, and planted a light kiss on their lips.

"There. Now we are!"

Matt's face went pale as he realized the scene that was playing out got the attention of some party goers. Phones already recording in case a fight broke out. Leaving no possibly way to get everyone to delete those videos.

Not realizing his crush had a hold of his hand to prevent any conflict, he tugged them out the door, trying his best to shield his face.

Once outside they both sat on the stone slabs of the sidewalk. Matt's crush clearing their throat to help stop the akward moment.

"You know... If you wanted to kiss me, you should have just asked..."

"Oh maple leaf! I am so sorry! I didn't even know I had it in me!"

His crush shook their head, chuckling, then leaned in for another kiss.

"There. Now we're even."

All matt could do was repeat their words with a dreamy sigh.

"Now we're even..."

Russia:

Ivan was already pretty shy, but he really wanted to hangout with his crush. So he let them rope him into going to the party Francis was having. It was a small party, so it wasn't all bad. Other than no one wanting to talk to him due to his lack of English.

His crush was certainly doing plenty of talking through out the night though, and they eventually pulled him aside to ask him something.

"Hey, Ivan? You okay? You don't look like you're enjoying yourself much".

His crush knew to keep sentences as simple and short as possible since he struggled with English. But he still managed a good enough response.

"Da. I am... Not good at the parties. Not one person, speeches? To Ivan..."

His crush smiled, reaching up to playfully ruffle his hair, earning a small giggle.

"You mean to say 'no one speaks to me'. I'm sorry. It can be hard, da?"

He nodded at them. Giving a smile knowing his crush at least tries to conversate with him. But there was something else on his mind. The more they talked, the more he seemed to stare at their lips. He was struggling more and more with hiding his blush. Eventually his crush took it as a sign he was overheating and they dragged him to the bathroom to splash water to his face.

"It is too warm for a turtle neck and scarf! Your face is very warm!"

Ivan shook his head, face getting redder from the embarrassment.

"Nyet!"

His crush gave a look of confusion, and Ivan took this as a sign to try and explain.

"You do much of the talking. I... Do much of the seeing. Nyet. I do much of the-"

He gestured his gaze to his crush's lips, unable to convey his message and when it still didn't sink in for them, Ivan did the next best thing out of pure frustration.

He kissed them. It felt like forever, but it was cut too short as the sound of a gasp interrupted them. Breaking away he spotted Francis standing at the door that was left wide open. A phone with the light on, signalling it was recording them.

"Oh ho ho! This is quite the confession! A love that goes beyond language barriers is just as strong as love itself!"

Ivan couldn't seem to follow Francis' words, especially because he was more concerned with the phone footage.

"You take video for just us, da?"

Francis gave a smirk and took off without another word. Ivan wasn't dumb when it came to body language, and he took off after him. Taking no time at all to corner Francis, scaring everyone else as the two of them bickered over the phone.

"Throw out the phone!"

"I will do no such thing!

"I will throw you instead!"

It took his crush snagging the phone and deleting the video for everything to finally settle back down.

England:

He was kind of popular in the sense everyone knew him as the punk kid who could play the electric guitar. But so did others students so he wasn't exactly special. So yeah, he was wicked shy and insecure about how everyone viewed him.

But his crush seemed to treat him differently, and honestly? He was secretly hoping that meant they really liked him. Maybe even more than liked!

The best part is, he wasn't even expecting his crush to show up at some random person's party. He, himself, was only there to help a band entertain. But there they were, his crush, dancing and bopping along to the music.

He found himself making a lot of eye contact with them, and when the first break came around, he bounced off the makeshift stage. His crush immediately walking over to him to pester.

"That was amazing! I didn't know you played so well!"

Arthur pulled at his bangs.

"Thanks love. It means quite a lot coming from you. Especially because you didn't expect to see me here, of all places..."

"Actually I-"

Before they could continue, they were dragged off by some of their friends to be introduced to someone. He decided to follow, wanting to know what the fuss was about. And of course his crush's friends were trying to hook them up with... Francis...

He gave a verbal sigh, watching his crush shift uncomfortably as Francis did his best to act all suave. His crush looked back at him with pleading eyes. This gave him an idea.

He walked over, slinging an arm around their shoulder, speaking up and over their conversation.

"There you are darling! I've been searching the whole bloody house for you! Oh, hello Francis. I didn't see you there!"

Things got intense, and before anyone knew it, Francis and Arthur had gotten into a fist fight. There wasn't a particular winner, but Arthur certainly left the fight with the only bruised lip. Sitting at one of the spare couches, his crush tended to the bruise.

"I can't believe you did that! Are you nuts? Why do you two fight anyway!"

"I'm sorry love... It's just... He gets in the way is all".

"In the way of what? Some male pride?"

"...you"

Silence filled the space between them, only to be broken by the chaste and airy kiss from his crush.

"I didn't know..."

"Part of me didn't want you too..."

Neither of them knew someone had recorded them until the day they returned to the college. Someone had thought it was funny to make a "fancam" of Arthur "fighting for his loved one". The only words his new lover could mutter was:

"At least no one is going to have to ask us if we're together now..."

[hetalia-high-school-au-ask-blog]

Introduction!

This is all the information you need to know for this AU thingy!

So this AU is gonna be huge. All the hetalia characters I can think of will make an appearance. Now this will be mature, so if you are not comfortable with DARK topics, do not read it. This is my warning. 

Ships that will be in this (in no particular order):

Alfred x Arthur

Matthew x Gilbert

Ludwig x Feliciano

Lovino x Antonio

Yao x Ivan

Kiku x Heracles

Roderich x Vash

Feliks x Toris

Matthais x Lukas

Berwald x TIno

Emil x Li

Vladimir x Milen

Romeo x Anthony 

Some ships may be added or removed.

World Academy is a school in Washington D.C. It strives to be very accepting and very open, having many different people from many different countries. It has amazing sports programs, as well as art and drama programs. It's a huge school filled with different people, all with different interests. Because of this, the school has many sports from all over the world, such as soccer/European football, American football, and Australian football. The school has the highest grades in the area, and most students are well behaved, thanks to the high discipline by students and teachers.

Now I will give a little blurb about each character in the context of this AU.

Alfred F. Jones(America)- Alfred is an energetic young boy, your classic jock. He is a big sweetheart, with a heart of gold, and would die for his friends. He loves to cook, but enjoys some good chicken nuggets from McDonald's every once and awhile. He is also a VERY big fan of American football, and loves to play with his buddies. Despite being a popular jock, he would never bully someone for anything, especially for their sexuality, since he himself was bi. His life seems perfect, but is there something dark under the surface?

Arthur Kirkland(England)- Arthur is a prim and proper young man, with a bright future ahead of him. He is the student council president, and is feared throughout the school, since he holds the power of a staff member when it comes to punishing misbehaving students. He also has a secret sporty side, not playing on the school's official teams, but for fun on club teams. No one knows about this side of him, and he'd prefer to keep it that way. Very very gay for all the jocks in the school but refuses to admit it.

Matthew Williams(Canada)- Matthew is timid. You could tell from a mile away, if you could spot him. He was shorter than his older brother, Alfred, and is outshined by him in every way. The one thing he had a better grip on were his grades, which mattered very little to his parents. He too had a secret that even Alfred didn't know about, and he knew if he revealed this secret, Alfred would be pissed. Likes to refer to himself as demi, but is more gay than he realizes.

Gilbert Beilschmidt(Prussia)- Gilbert is a very loud and obnoxious boy, constantly harassing both boys and girls about numbers and flirting relentlessly. He hated following rules and would often disobey dress code, and be disruptive during class. Sometimes he'd straight up ditch class and waltz back in the food with no care in the world. He's protective though, especially of his little brother, and who he thinks needs it. He's pansexual, like the entire BTT.

Ludwig Beilschmidt(Germany)- Ludwig is serious and tough, not taking shit from anyone. He is the student council's vice president. He doesn't hold as much power as Arthur, therefore is less feared, but he makes people aware that they shouldn't break rules. He's a hunky man, and attracts many suitors, but he only has his eyes on one boy. A certain art student with a cute curl, and adorable smile. Demi sexual (or felisexual)

Feliciano Vargas(N. Italy)- Feliciano was an art student with an uncontrollable love for pasta. He is a bubbly and happy boy, and is rarely seen without a smile. He is one of the best artists in school and is commonly tasked with making murals and posters for events. He is quite popular for it. His best friends are Ludwig and Kiku, though he feels guilty about Ludwig. He won't deny that Ludwig looked a lot like his old crush from middle school, and kept him around for the fuzzy feeling. Though, he loves Ludwigs company either way. Gay for Ludwig, but doesn't really know yet.

Lovino Vargas(S. Italy)- Feliciano's meaner and more aggressive brother. He is considered by many to be an "evil twin," since his and his brothers personality clash. He does have a few soft spots though. He loves tomatoes, and his love for pasta is almost as big as his brother's. He is outshined a bit by his brother's artistic skill, and his ability to speak to others. It made him feel he was lesser, and he lashed out because of it. He still loves his brother, despite the fact he feels inferior to him.

Antonio Fernandez Carriedo(Spain)- Musical nerd. He loves the classic musicals, and the new musicals as well. Often found singing in the drama room and will no doubt perform any musical song you ask him too. He can play the guitar, and likes to learn his favorite songs and Lovino will play tambourine along with him. One of the happiest and positive boys in school. Pansexual, like all of the BTT, but really likes Lovino.

Yao Wang(China)- Secretary of the student counsel so he is very serious about rules. One of the oldest kids in school, but pretty short. Most people know not to mess with him though, because he takes karate classes, and already has a black belt. He's kind of a neat freak, and wants everything to be perfect. Spends most of the time in the library organizing books and gossiping with the librarian.

Ivan Braginsky(Russia)- Ivan is one of the tallest and scariest guys in school, but is honestly very sweet. He doesn’t try to scare people, but ends up accidentally doing so because he is bad at anything social. He has a few issues, but is genuinely trying to fix himself, and understands people’s views of him. He has a big attachment to his sister, Katyusha, and keeps the scarf she made for him when they were children.

Kiku Honda(Japan)- Kiku is an odd boy. He has a fascination with art and mythology of all cultures. He also values his own life and culture and will happily tell people about it. He is the treasurer of the student council, and is pretty closed off, thanks to his massive love of anime. He tries to not let it bother him too much. His favorite mythology to learn about is greek mythology, since it is so far from his home country and is so different .

Heracles Karpusi(Greece)- A quiet and reserved boy, but incredibly horny all of the time. Often thinks of his friend Kiku in sexual ways, but is often unfazed by it. He quite enjoys these thoughts. He is Kiku’s main source of mythology information, since he himself is greek and they share a mythology class. He hates this guy named Sadik, and has hated him for a really long time because they were an item at one point. He doesn’t like to think about it.

Roderich Edelstein(Austria)- One of the most snobby rich kids you’ll ever meet. He thinks he’s better than everyone else and really only cares about himself. He was the previous president of the student council, but lost the election to Arthur this year. He is still upset about it. Now he spends most of his time playing the violin and piano. At this point he is only concerned about his image to colleges and nothing else.

Vash Zwingil(Switzerland)- Gun crazy, and very protective of his adoptive little sister. He has been in love with Roderich for years, ever since they were children, but has started to hate the person that Roderich has become, but is still madly in love. No one except his sister knows, and he would like to keep it that way. He does get it through to Roderich that he should treat people a bit better.

Feliks Lucasiewicz(Poland)- Very… comfortable with himself. His family is very christan, and he knew he was gay from an early age, and knew his family wouldn’t be supportive. So to give a gainate middle finger to his family, he began to cross dress, and ended up really enjoying it. He often gets mistaken for a girl, and is flirted with. He finds this cute, but usually tells them there’s no point. He is quite desirable among gay boys in his school.

Toris Laurinaitis(Lithuania)- The main writer of the newspaper club, and very shy. He was abducted by Feliks, and has grown a weird crush on him. He thought he was straight for the longest time, but this boy confuses him. He is slowly opening up more because of Feliks, and they go horse riding together a lot. He loves these rides because it’s an excuse to get even closer to Feliks.

Matthais Kohlar(Denmark)- A literal crackhead. He is often caught either in the middle of something bad, or about to do something dangerous. Whether he is always high or just reckless is never clear. He has broken practically every bone in his body, at least once. He is a massive headache to take care of but he's a pure hearted guy who loves his friends. Like this dude should jump off a cliff for the sake of friendship.

Lukas Bindevik(Norway)- Reserved and closed off. He is very mysterious and is often caught talking to himself. He grew up without siblings or friends, and his parents are divorced. He had no contact with his father, and only grew up with his mother, and therefore grew mother-like tendencies. He can be very protective, and is good at talking people through their problems, even with his minimalistic speech.

Berwald Oxenstierna(Sweden)- The tallest and most terrifying guy. He's 6'4 muscular and has this resting bitch face that could strike fear into the hearts of WWE wrestlers. But he is actually a giant teddy bear when it comes to the people he cares about. He's big and buff, his hugs are great. He likes to sing to himself while he's working or lost in thought, and many find this charming, earning him many suitors in the process. He's too dense, and too gay for a certain Finn to realize how popular he is.

Tino Vainamoinen(Finland)- One of the most positive and loveable boys in the world. He is only 5'2, and a little on the cubby side, but he is very confident, not afraid to show off his body. He may seem innocent, but on the inside is one of the most kinky shits. He loves a good pounding and will let you know. He will go into heavy detail about his sex life when he's drunk, making people laugh, or be uncomfortable. He's got his eyes on a certain Swede though. He’s also on the hockey team.

Emil Stielsson(Iceland)- Emil is a new kid. He had lived with his single father since he was an infant, not knowing anything about his mother. His dad never told him. But he came to this school this year. He was very awkward around new people, but found comfort on social butterflies talking to him. He is lowkey kinda emo and is stuck in his emo middle school. He is learning how cringy he had been.

Li Xiao Chun(Hong Kong)- A social butterfly. He somehow ended up being friends with every clique in his school from his broad range of interests and friendly personality. Though he does sometimes get fought over because of just how loveable he is. All the different cliques he's friends want to hang out all the time, but because he has so many friends, his schedule is usually filled. He never fails to make time for his newest friend, Emil.

Francis Bonnefoy(France)- The. Biggest. Man. Whore. He has been with practically everyone in school. Most notably his friend with benefits for 2 years, Arthur. Francis had fallen in love, but Arthur never returned the feelings. He always pressed a bit, to see if there was a chance Arthur changed his mind, but never forced him into it.

Alory Kirkland(N.Ireland)- In college. He’s the oldest of the Kirkland siblings (26). He’s very annoyed most of the time, the simple sound of people talking can make him angry. His little brother, Arthur, is the worst. For some reason that boy in particular could be breathing too hard and it would annoy Alory. He’s so glad to have moved out, away from his loud chaotic family. He loves them but he prefers it quiet.

Allistor Kirkland(Scotland)- The second oldest of the Kirkland siblings (24). He's also in college, but constantly visits, unlike Alory. He’s also much happier and peppy. He was never a role model though, always getting in trouble when he was a kid. But, he was the fun one for sure. He also likes to take his siblings golfing, since that is something that he does love to do. He can get competitive with everyone there.

Reuben Kirkland(Wales)- The most chill of the Kirkland siblings. He’s 22, and will visit every once and awhile. He doesn’t talk a lot, and really only spoke after he turned 16. He and Allistor got into all kinds of trouble as kids. He is an actual role model though and would apologize. When he doesvist, he likes to cook for the whole family, since he’s the one who can do it correctly in their family.

Dwight Kirkland(Hutt River)- He is LOVED by his grandparents and aunts and uncles because he sucks up to them when he’s with them.Because of this he is always sent piles of money, and ends up with about ~1000 dollars a year. He loves to flaunt his money in front of his other siblings and spoils himself with it. This is why no 16 year old should have this much money. They’ll use it on stupid things.

Jett Kirkland(Australia)- The athletic one of the family. He loves to swim, surf, and to play australian football. He has broken too many bones to count and has almost died multiple times thanks to being reckless. Kaelin had to perform CPR one time because he almost drowned. He still continues, even if he almost dies. He is quite dumb and will tag along with Alfred. They have many… misadventures. Let’s hope he doesn't die before he goes to senior year (hes 18)

Kaelin Kirkland(New Zealand)- One of the only people who can keep Jett from actually killing himself. He is a movie review youtuber, and spends most of his time in his basement, researching and recording for videos. He is also lowkey obsessed with sheep. His entire room is sheep themed, and it has caused every friend he’s invited over to laugh and call him cute. He doesn’t like being called cute. Acts older than he is (17).

Peter Kirkland(Sealand)- In middle school(12). He is still obsessed with disney and princes. He is convinced that Alfred is a hidden prince and will try to expose him. Also crushing hard on Alfred. He tries his best to be recognised by his peers, but his efforts are futile, since he just annoys the people around him.He trie ]s to ot let it bother him but he’ll be the first to admit that it did hurt him a bit. 

Wendy Kirkland(Wy)- She is quite aggressive. Jett taught her different ways to pin someone to the floor, and she’ll test these ways on Peter. Arthur tries to stop them, but Jett and Kaelin will make bets on these kids. Wendy always wins, because Peter doesn’t know how to fight back. Other than that, Wendy is very artistic and draws a lot in her free time. She impressed the people around her.

Romeo Vargas(Seborga)- Similarly to Matthais and Jett, he can’t keep himself out of trouble. He got stuck in a tree, and the fire department had to get called to get him out. He may have done this on purpose just to get carried by buff firemen, but that’s unclear. He’s the youngest and most reckless Vargas brother, but spends his time volunteering at the middle school as an assistant, and met Peter and Wendy through it.

Im Yong Soo(S. Korea)- He’s sorta a perv. He can get a little touchy at times, and will constantly flirt with any living breathing human. Kiku finds this annoying,but he knows Soo means nothing by it. He has a tendency to grope when drunk, resulting in a hard slap to the face from Kiku, who was not so nicely touched. Soo apologies\es profusely after he sobered up, knowing that what he did was wrong.

Natalya Braginskaya(Belarus)- Very creepy and has… incestous tendencies towards her brother. She is the one personwho can scare him and is constantly pestering Ivan to date her in secret. She hates Yao’s guts since she knows that Ivan has a crush on him. Thankfully weapons aren’t allowed on campus, otherwise Yao would not be alive. Seriously the girl is unhinged and needs help.

Katyusha Braginskaya(Ukraine)- She’s a very loving and caring big sister, but after a long series of events, she barely speaks to Ivan anymore. She knows he still loves her though thanks to him wearing the scarf she made for him when they were kids everyday. They are slowly working on rebuilding their relationship, but it’s a slow process. She desperately wants that relationship with her brother back.

Sadik Adnan(Turkey)- He absolutely hates Harecles’s guts from some stuff that happened in middle school. They constantly fight, usually behind the school, but sometimes find hospitality while bathing. They have normal conversations in the showers, but are at each other’s throats any other time. He breaks the dress code a lot by wearing a hat to hide his face most of the time, and refuses to take it off.

Gupta Muhammad Hassan(Eygpt)- Selectively mute. He can hear just fine but he doesn't talk at all, preferring to speak over text and emojis. Even then, his monotone personality shows through his texts, where he gives single word responses only. He's very reserved and all that's known about him is that he had something to do with the Heracles and Sadik drama that happened. He refuses to talk about that, text and all.

Lillia Zwingil(Lichtenstein)- Vash's younger sister, and the light of his life. She is very loving to her brother, making food for him every day and seeing new clothes for him in home economics. She also likes to go hunting with Vash, despite her dainty and cute persona, she has a wicked aim, thanks to Vash teaching her. She's also the only one to know his crush on Roderick.

Eduard Von Bock(Estonia)- Hacker man. Well sorta. He likes to work on computers but he'll admit that it's hard for him to work. Not necessarily because he's bad at it, but because his internet is slow. He does his best, but sometimes downloading a file tha tag takes three days only to be told you don't have enough space makes you want to punch a hole straight through the computer.

Ravis Galante(Latvia)- He small and just pushed around by the bigger boys a lot. He is often bullied for his height and shy stutter, and had no way to stand up for himself. He'll begin to speak, but either get shut down or chicken out. So he spends most of his time in the library, sitting in the loneliness. He did like friends, it just made it hard when the entire school hates you.

Gianna Bonnefoy(Monaco)- She's Francis's half sister and is just as flirty. She loves to make everyone around her blush in her presence, either by radiating beauty or making inappropriate comments. Francis will tell her to stop, which is really code for, keep going it's entertaining. She liked to braid people's hair, weather they're boys, girls, or anything in between. If you had hair she wanted to do it up all nice.

Vladimir Popescu(Romania)- Obsessed with everything paranormal. 100% believes in ghosts and likes to go out ghost hunting. He will go to abandoned asylums or hospitals to try and find spooky activity. He can get extremely jumpy and scared when it comes to ghost hunts, and has screamed like a girl on multiple occasions. When he's not doing that, he plays D&D, and is very good at it. He DMs.

Milan Hinova(Bulgaria)- He really likes yogurt. He and Vladimir go on ghost hunts and he is actually very calm. He doesn't believe in ghosts and will brush any sort of paranormal activity off as wind or the state of the building they're in, and is like Vladimir's protector. They'll often record and post videos of these ghost hunts. He doesn't play D&D, but will come to the sessions to hang out with Vladimir.

Anthony Gunner Jones(Molossia)- A sweetheart around his parents and when he's alone, but foul mouthed and angry with his friends. Alfred and Matthew's cousin, who they really like. He will get very flustered and embarrassed if he's complimented, and will punch people in the arms when he feels it's appropriate. He also volunteers at the middle school as a gym assistant, and has a GIANT crush on Romeo.

Thank you for reading.

[the-observant-frisbeetarian]

Chapter 1

Meanwhile, Across Town by George deValier

Chapter saved by ocean-babyblues ♥

INTRODUCTION

.

Once, not all that long ago, the streets of Hetalopolis were ruled by greed and tyranny. Rival gangs roamed both alleyways and corporate boardrooms. Citizens huddled afraid in their homes, the night belonged to the darkness, and evil held the city in its iron fist. 

Then rose up the superheroes. Humans born with inhuman powers, who chose to fight the dark with the powers of virtue and right. For a time war raged above and within our fair city, the supervillains and the superheroes locked in an age old struggle of right and wrong, good and evil, light and darkness. 

Until finally there rose five. Five heroes from the north who vanquished the ruling villains of the east and drove the remainder into hiding. And the streets became safe once more. The villains faded into obscurity and the heroes found themselves unneeded, discarded, forgotten. Some moved on, took jobs, lived quiet, little lives. Others, unable to reside in normality, clung to their past dreams, their past glory. And for a while, all was well on the streets of Hetalopolis. 

But for some, peace is uneasy, and of those born with power some will always use it for darkness and gain. Evil now lurks in the shadows once more. But where there is evil, good will always rise to fight it, and where there is despair, hope is never far...

"Are you nearly done?"

"...huh?"

"Well, it's just, I mean, I asked you if you'd heard any news lately and you've been droning on for about ten minutes now, it's getting a bit tiresome."

"Some people can't appreciate a good bit of dramatic history."

"Some people don't have three years to stand around chatting in alleyways."

"Fair enough. You want to know what news I've heard? Read your local newspaper. The articles by Arthur Kirkland. He's the only one who seems to have a clue."

"I travel all the way here to the scummiest side of town to speak with you and you tell me to read the newspaper? What happened to the informer, the AlleyCat, the guy who always knows what's going on?"

"You asked. I answered. Go pick up your local newspaper. And remember my words."

"What words, aru?"

The AlleyCat shrugged, threw another handful of crumbs to the dozens of cats that always congregated around his feet. "'... where there is evil, good will always rise to fight it.'"

CHAPTER ONE

.

"Just what do you expect me to do with this?" shouted Ludwig Beilschmidt, chief editor of the Hetalopolis Times, throwing the small pile of paper down on his desk. Arthur winced and prepared himself for an outburst. "This is pathetic. Your last story was just as pitiful, but do you really think I will stand for this twice? What is this even…" The editor in chief picked up the papers again and stared at them incredulously. "'The Perfume Villain Strikes Again.'. That's your headline? No one has even heard of this 'Perfume Villain!' How can he 'strike again' when we didn't even know about the first strike?"

"Sir, he's actually robbed a few bank vaults by now, and I really think…"

"No, you don't think, Kirkland, that is your problem. You used to be brilliant. Your articles about The Nordic Five versus the Sunflower Posse were some of the best I have ever seen. They won you the damn Journalist of the Year award. But no one cares about superheroes anymore. Ever since the demise of the Posse, they're old news. Frankly, your work is slipping. And this," the editor threw the papers back down on the desk again, "Is trash. So get out there, bring me a great story, or I am going to have to think quite seriously about letting you go. Now get out of here and do your job."

Arthur picked up the papers and stormed out of the office, almost feeling smoke coming from his ears. He was fuming. He was furious. He was... he was a god damn writer and he couldn't even think of another synonym that started with 'f'. No wonder he no longer wrote the front page articles. Foul! There's a word. He was in one hell of a foul mood. Arthur stomped past rows of identical desks and identical tapping at keyboards and ceiling length windows that looked down on the sprawling city below. He fell into his chair and threw the papers onto his desk even more violently than Ludwig had done. And Ludwig was a champion at throwing paper angrily onto desks. He could compete in the bloody angrily throwing paper on desks world championship. Arthur was just thinking that at least things probably couldn't get any worse when Francis Bonnefoy, fellow journalist, fashion editor, and fabulously irritating thorn in Arthur's side, spun around from his desk in front, smiled revoltingly, and practically sprawled across Arthur's desk. "Well?" Arthur snarled at him. Things could always get worse.

"Same old bleeding bloody buggery bullshit." Arthur realised he seemed to be a fan of alliteration when pissed off. Francis flinched and sucked in a breath through his teeth.

"Language, dear, sometimes you conjure up the most horrific mental images."

"What the hell does he expect me to do?" asked Arthur angrily, loudly ignoring Francis. "I can't create stories out of thin air! I'm a journalist, not Stephen bloody King! How can I be constantly expected to produce five star, gold material when the most interesting thing that has happened this week is that Miss Katyusha from channel five news busted her top open live on air Wednesday night?"

"And the gossip department is already all over that one," nodded Francis sympathetically.

"Do you know what I mean though?" Arthur was nearly shouting now. "No one else gets this sort of pressure put on them. Look at Feliciano." Arthur gestured to where the Italian food critic was currently sitting ON his desk, making paper planes and throwing them at the sports department. "What has he published, two articles in the last month? And he's not getting called into Ludwig's office every day."

"Well, he is, but for an entirely different reason I think."

Arthur groaned and dropped his head onto the desk. "This is so unfair! What am I supposed to do?"

"Come up with a brilliant story," said Francis brightly. Arthur resisted the urge to stab him in the eye with a pen.

"There are no stories, I've already told you." Arthur spoke through gritted teeth. "The town is running better than it has in years. The supervillains have pretty much disappeared and the only heroes left have nothing to do but get kittens down from trees and help little old ladies cross the street. So, pray tell, where am I supposed to find this brilliant story?"

But Arthur knew where the stories were. He was convinced that the only reason no one cared about superheroes anymore was because most of the popular ones had retired. If only there was someone new, someone fresh and interesting that people could get excited about. And if this new superhero had an adversary, well, there was Arthur's golden ticket to journalism popularity. The glittering awards shows, the lavish dinners with heads of state, the prestige that came with having the rich and famous under the power of his pen. It could all be his again. Arthur already had the villain of his story... true, a rather smalltime, unknown, pathetic villain, but what was good journalism without a little embellishment... so now he just needed the hero. But where the hell was he supposed to find...

"Here's your coffee, Mr K!" Arthur looked up to see Alfred Jones, resident copy boy and coffee maker, stumble towards him like an out of control steam train. Arthur pushed his chair back just in time to avoid the cup that smashed and spilled over his entire desk.

"Bloody blasted hell boy, watch what you're damn well doing! And I asked for tea!"

"Sorry about that, Mr K," said Alfred apologetically, leaning over the desk in an eager, dementedly happy attempt to clean up the mess.

"No," said Arthur, trying to salvage what he could of the soaking papers, "Just leave it."

"I am sorry, honest, I'll get you another one just as soon as I've cleaned this..." Alfred pulled a handful of crumpled tissues from his pocket and used them to wipe down the desk. "Oh man, I even spilled some in your lap, lucky it wasn't actually that hot, here let me..."

Arthur shot out of his chair like a rocket. "Hands, watch the hands!"

"Sorry sorry!" Alfred backed away, hands in the air. Arthur sighed in exasperation. How did they even hire people these days...

"Look, listen, Allan..."

"Alfred," corrected Alfred, sounding a little hurt.

"Yes yes of course. Just... look, just go away, will you? I'm incredibly busy right now."

Alfred's face fell and he nodded. "All right, Mr K, I really am sorry though." He walked away slowly and Arthur grumbled as he turned his attention back to saving what he could from his coffee soaked desk. Francis stared at him through narrowed eyes.

"You are too harsh on him."

"Well he's a walking train wreck with impeccably bad timing. Why did you even suggest Ludwig hire him?"

"Well, look at him. He's so... energetic. And cute. Just look. I mean really, look now, while he's walking away, he's got a really cute butt."

Arthur refused to admit that Francis was right on that last point. He forced himself not to look. "He's a bloody nuisance is what he is."

"He has a crush on you, you know." Francis waggled his eyebrows. Arthur felt himself turn red.

"Don't be ridiculous. And stop bothering me, I'm busy! Don't you have your own work to do? Just look at the time. Oh bugger off!" Francis just laughed as he turned back to his own desk.

Arthur stayed late at the office, trying to work on the dregs of this nonexistent story he had. A small time villain whose power appeared to be a nerve paralysing fume he used to render guards and law officers unconscious. Nothing special, but he had so far managed to make off with a few million dollars worth of diamonds and jewellery. But no deaths, no battles. Nothing much to draw the publics attention. Now if only there was a hero to set out, fight, and defeat the guy... now that would be interesting. That would make a story.

By the time Arthur finally left the office the building was empty, and the dark alley he exited onto was silent and unlit. He'd always hated that the staff exit led to this horribly narrow and smelly and sinister alleyway. It was bad enough in the middle of the day. But at this time of night… Barely paying attention to his surroundings, but walking a little faster than usual, Arthur only made it halfway to the main street before the lane was blocked by two huge men before him. Arthur froze and took a wary step backward.

"Little late to be leaving work alone, isn't it?" asked one of the men unpleasantly, stepping forward as Arthur stepped back.

"Well... uh... you know how it is, deadlines and such..." Arthur turned to look behind him but another man, even bigger than the first two, stepped out of the shadows to block the way. Arthur swallowed the rising fear in his throat.

"Now we don't want to make this any more unpleasant than it has to be," said the third man, cracking his knuckles and making Arthur shudder. The other men laughed as they advanced. "Oh wait... yes we do."

Arthur stood frozen for a moment before adrenaline pumped through his veins and he attempted a brash, futile escape. He was swiftly grabbed by the shoulder and slammed against the wall. One of the men pulled his laptop case from his arm and the other tore his briefcase from his grip before rifling through his jacket. "Wait, no..." Arthur couldn't believe this... it was like it wasn't real. His pulse thrummed hazily in his head. Wasn't this just his bloody luck... right when the damned city was getting safe, he gets mugged in the street. He tried for another escape but received a stunning blow to his cheek for the trouble. The men were laughing. Their hands were like iron. Arthur couldn't escape. He started to panic.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, a red, white and blue tornado descended before Arthur's eyes. A few surprised shouts, a grunt, a flurry of fists and limbs and garish colour and before Arthur knew it the three men were lying unconscious on the ground. He blinked dazedly in surprise and looked up at his unexpected saviour. He wiped his eyes and shook his head, but the strange vision before him remained the same. The man was dressed in an awful blue Lycra unitard, enormous boots that looked like they had been spray painted red, and what looked suspiciously like an old bed sheet tied around his shoulders. He put his hands on his hips and stood before Arthur in an impossibly ridiculous stance.

"Are you all right, fair dams… uh… citizen?"

Arthur squinted. Sure it was dark, and he was a little shaken, but he was fairly sure that the guy standing right before him was… "Alfred?"

Alfred's eyes darted and he laughed nervously. "Who is this Alfred you speak of?"

Arthur rolled his eyes. "Alfred, I know it's you."

"I know nothing of this Alfred. For I, fair citizen, am…" Alfred took a deep breath, thrust out his chest, and tossed his bed sheet behind his shoulder. "America-man!"

Silence. Arthur swore he could hear crickets chirping. "No you're not, you're Alfred Jones, the copy boy who spills my tea every day."

Again Alfred looked around nervously. "I swear, fair citizen, I..."

"Alfred, you can't just take off your glasses and wrap a sheet around you and expect it to be a credible disguise."

"Oh." Alfred deflated somewhat. Arthur tilted his head as he studied him. He didn't know whether to laugh. Alfred almost looked like a little boy playing dress up. A rather tall, oversized, very muscular actually through that Lycra...

"Not thinking that! I mean, uh, so you're a superhero then?"

"Yep!" At Arthur's skeptical expression, Alfred's brave smile fell a little. "Okay, so I've only just started, and I don't have a copyright yet, or a proper uniform, really, or a, uh..."

"Clue?" supplied Arthur.

"I suppose, but hey." Alfred brightened and thrust out his chest again. "Did you SEE the ass kicking I gave those guys?"

Arthur looked down at the unconscious would-be muggers. There were a few superhero wannabes around... those who had a lot of enthusiasm but no actual powers... but Alfred had certainly done a number on the three men. Plus he had a certain something, indefinable, an attitude that made it seem like he really could take on the world. Maybe there was something there after all. Maybe Arthur could work this to his advantage. "All right. Alfred?"

"Yeah? Oh, damn it..."

"Listen here."

"Okay."

"You want to be a superhero?" Alfred nodded eagerly. "So, now I'm just guessing here, you can't fly."

"No."

"You can't turn invisible."

"No."

"You don't have super speed?"

"Uh… no."

"Forgive me for asking, but what exactly is your superpower then?"

"Well, I can do this. Follow me." Arthur picked up his laptop and suitcase and followed Alfred out of the alley, taking care to kick his unconscious attackers in the head as he went. Then he watched as Alfred walked over to a car parked on the side of the road, grabbed it by the bumper, and in one fluid movement lifted it over his head. Arthur raised an eyebrow.

"Super strength. Well that's something. Very well, Alfred Jones..."

"America-man."

Arthur paused only briefly. "As I was saying, very well. I believe there may be some hope for you after all. But first thing is first. We are going to have to do something about that outfit of yours. Now you, follow me." Arthur turned and headed down the street. Alfred hurried to follow. "Alfred."

"Yeah?"

"Put the car down."

"Oh. Right."

Alfred wanted to be a superhero. Arthur needed a story. He smiled to himself. He may have just found the answer he was looking for.

.

Meanwhile, across town…

.

The third security guard fell to the ground, motionless. The masked villain smiled as he passed. No one could withstand the assault of his nerve paralysing perfume. Years of exposure had left him immune, but when others smelled it they dropped like little old ladies who got in his way in the after Christmas sales. With none left to obstruct him, he strutted calmly and purposefully to the locked room at the end of the hall. He held up the key, recently obtained from a helplessly unresisting bank manager, and placed it into the lock. The doorknob turned with a satisfying click and the masked man stepped into the undefended room.

The perfume villain walked over to a small safe on the back table, pressed in a simple five number code, and smiled when the little black door swung open. He pulled out a blue velvet box and held it up to the light, inspecting his nails as he did. He frowned. He'd already chipped one. And he'd only just had a manicure. He placed the box in his exquisitely tailored jacket and turned on his red varnished heel. The steadily approaching sound of sirens did not bother him. He would be gone well before they arrived. He giggled to himself and gave a tiny wave to a security camera as he passed.

"Totally killer. Seriously, that was, like, way too easy. Classic."

To be continued…

.

Next Chapter

Disclaimer: This story belongs to George deValier. Hetalia belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya. I own nothing.

THANK YOU OCEAN-BABYBLUES FOR SAVING THIS CHAPTER!

[alitaimagines]

request: “could i have a punk! arthur imagine? maybe she’s a little quite country, being friends with Matthew, Raivis, Toris, etc and Arthur sees her and he’s immediately in love with her and when he introduces himself to her, she makes him all blushy and he actually wants to take her out instead of doing what he usually does and she’s kinda the reason why arthur goes back to his gentlemen ways. THANKS!”

punk! arthur kirkland x fem! reader

fandom: hetalia

note: so my personal hot take on punk Arthur was during the rise of bands like Blur, Franz Ferdinand, Oasis, etc. All of that was during the late 90′s and early 2000′s so that’s the era I’m using. Although the song the reader is singing in the imagine is Play That Song by Train and I know it wasn’t written during the early 2000′s but I really don’t care. I thought it went well with the imagine. 

The nations were holding an un-formal meeting to tie up any business negotiations that they had with any countries. It also gave those a chance to start business negotiations if they needed too. 

You had already finished your business deals so now you were just talking to your small group of friends. It was an odd bunch of countries considering nobody really ever seen Matthew, Raivis, Toris, and yourself interacting but it got you away from the loudness of the other countries. 

The four of you were sipping on wine on the farthest table of the field. Considering it was a warm summer day in Alfred’s country, he decided to have the meeting on a field filled with fairy lights and other aesthetically pleasing views. 

“So, on the topic of countries, where is Estonia?” You asked. “I haven’t exactly seen him around here.” 

Toris laughed, “He’s off doing work for his country and he wasn’t able to make the meeting. I’m just glad that Mr.Russia isn’t around us. I haven’t seen him since we’ve gotten here.” 

“Oh, he’s over there with Arthur!” You exclaimed as you pointed to the drunken Brit who was pestering Ivan. “I haven’t seen Artie this hammered since the late 1950′s!” 

Arthur upon hearing his name being said lifted his head up and scanned the field to see who it was. He looked over the countries until his eyes landed on you. Arthur had never seen you before. He didn’t have strong connections to anyone that wasn’t Matthew at your table but when he immediately seen you, his face was covered in a blush. You giggling cutely to them and he immediately felt his stomach flip.

You were wearing a white summer dress as you were sipping your wine innocently. He wasn’t exactly in his best formal attire considering he was wearing a black leather jacket, ripped jeans with the Union Jack bandana on his neck. 

“Alfred, Alfred! Who’s that!” Arthur asked as best as he possibly could. Alfred turned around and smiled at you. “That’s ( your name / country name ), she’s really close with Canada, Latvia, Lithuania, and Estonia. Why?” 

Arthur tried to make up a reason, “My boss wants me to start a new business deal and I’ve never seen her before. 

“Well bro, she’s really nice and has great resources in terms of agriculture and technology so go for it. She’s kinda quiet though so don’t expect too much conversation.” 

Alfred finished the conversation by going back to drinking with Gilbert and Mathias. Arthur on the other hand didn’t want to drop it but by the time he started paying attention to his surroundings again, he noticed Raivis and Toris were looking at him. 

“I think Arthur might have a small crush on you.” Toris said teasingly as you turned your attention to Arthur. “Toris stop it, I doubt it. I’m not a big enough country to be politically together with someone of his status.” 

“No one ever mentioned a political relationship.” Matthew inserted. “I will admit, you are way out of his league but he hasn’t stopped staring at you for the last ten minutes.” 

You hid yourself behind the flowers on the table but before you knew it, Raivis spoke it, “Hey, he’s coming this way!” 

You looked at them in panic as they tried to hide their laugh. You slowly sunk into your seat but it meant nothing as he was already at your table. 

“May I have this dance, love?” Arthur asked. You looked over to your friends and they nodded in approval. You slowly got up from the chair and took Arthurs hand.

The song playing was “Play that Song” by Train. It wasn’t exactly a song to be dancing too but you didn’t bother to call it out. 

“Play that song, the one that makes me go all night long. The one that makes me of you, that’s all you gotta do.”

“Thanks for asking me to dance.” You whispered as your put your hands around his neck.”No one has asked me to dance in so long.” 

Arthur had nothing to stay and didn’t want to look like a complete idiot, “N-no problem! I’ve never seen you around.” 

You smiled which made Arthur want to melt right into your arms, “I’m not that much of a party person. I do a lot of negotiations back home so I never have a reason to go to these things. I can’t say the same thing about you though.” 

Arthur raised his eyebrow in confusion, “Whatever do you mean, love?” 

“Well, other countries talk. You come off as quite the party animal to all us quieter countries.” You said genuinely. “I’m not judging nor am I trying to come off as rude but we’re complete opposites. I would have never thought you’d ever come up to me and ask me to dance.”

Arthur didn’t know how to respond. You did have a point though. He was quite the party animal. Whenever he got into any shows, he did have a tendency to rage and sleep with anyone he possibly could but he didn’t want you to know that. 

“Countries might talk but that doesn’t mean it’s true, sweetheart.” Arthur said as you immediately laughed again. “I went to see Franz Ferdinand in London. I remember seeing you there and if I remember specifically, you were in the middle of the moshpit blacked out drunk.”

Arthur cringed knowing exactly what day you were talking about, “I don’t remember seeing you there.” 

“I was with my ex husband and we had VIP seats.” You mentioned as you tried to save Arthur the embarrassment. “Ex boyfriend, mind if I ask who it was?” 

You shrugged, “It was mostly a political marriage so really didn’t end in bad terms but if I have to say, it was Basch. He helped me economically and I helped him with military resources. We ended mutually as realized that we didn’t really need each other anymore.” 

“YOU WERE MARRIED TO SWITZERLAND?” Arthur screamed as you covered his mouth desperately. You shushed him and he nodded as you removed your hand from his mouth. “You took Swizterland to a rock concert? Who paid? You must’ve paid.” 

You nodded, “I did and since we had to be publicly seen together, we went to see Franz Ferdinand in London.” 

Arthur regained his composure and continued to sway with you but the song finished up much to his dismay. You slowly pulled away but he grabbed your wrist. 

“W-would you like to go out soon?” He asked as his shyness finally kicked in. “You don’t want too, it’s completely okay.” 

You smiled and grabbed the sharpie that was inside of the dress pocket, “Call me tomorrow and we can go out for dinner.” 

And with that, you let go of his hand and went to join Raivis and the rest of them again. Arthur looked down at his arm and seen the number written on it. For whatever reason, he wanted to shield you away from the life that Arthur was living and didn’t want you to see him blacked out drunk ever again. 

Arthur knew that if he asked you out, he was going to be dressed as proper as possible. None of that punk rock shit and truthfully, he didn’t really mind it. 

-ALITA

[brahms--heelshire]

Truth or Dare! (USUK)

(A/N): Listen. I just love them as awkward childhood friends who secretly like each other. Also, does this count as a very early birthday fic for Alfred? Also, if any of you remember my fic Stars, the ending of this one is practically a direct opposite of the ending of that one, which was not intended, just a happy little accident.

Arthur Kirkland was peculiar to most of the other kids in his class. He had an accent that all of the girls fancied and an aura to him that said for no-one to come too close. His bite stung just as much as his bark. Strangely enough, lovable Alfred F. ‘Can’t Read the Mood’ Jones, was his best friend. No-one really knew how it happened, but those two were as close as friends could get. And since Alfred got along with almost everyone, Arthur stopped getting into too many fights once they got close.

Arthur’s main problem was feeling different. When they got to that age when Alfred started noticing girls, Arthur didn’t exactly feel the same way that Alfred did about them. Arthur thought that girls could be nice friends, but nothing more. But Alfred saw practically every kid in class as possible dating material. Well, practically every kid besides Arthur. And that annoyed Arthur more than he liked to admit. Alfred was everything that Arthur thought would be good for a possible husband. Alfred was funny and charming and good with younger kids. He also got along well with Arthur and was strong.  And that wasn’t even mentioning Alfred’s outward appearance.

So when it came time for Alfred’s birthday party, Arthur sighed when he reached the door. Alfred wrote the invitations all himself and, for the first time, his mom said he could have a party with boys and girls. Arthur knew that meant that there would be uncomfortable truth or dare. Possibly something worse. They were only 9th graders, so Arthur doubted that Alfred’s mom would let them play Seven Minutes in Heaven, but Arthur didn’t know that for sure. Just the thought of being shoved into a closet with some girl who would inevitably want to make out with him gave Arthur the chills. It just felt wrong to him.

“Arthur! I’m so glad you came.” Alfred opened the door and gave Arthur a quick hug.

The chaos behind Alfred made Arthur’s stomach churn, but he swallowed his fear, choosing to walk in with Alfred.

“It’s your birthday party. I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” Arthur stayed close to Alfred. Having Alfred, Arthur had never found a reason to make friends with anyone else. When he ended up having to go to parties, Arthur greatly regretted that decision.

“Okay. We’re playing truth or dare right now. Come on! Let’s go back to everyone else.” Alfred grinned at Arthur and grabbed his hand to pull Arthur into the other room.

Arthur felt his face go red when Alfred grabbed his hand. He tried to think of terrible things in his mind to make him not look as flustered as he felt, but nothing worked.

There were more people than Arthur thought that there’d be. Arthur left Alfred’s gift on the table by the hallway.

“So where should I sit?” Arthur asked, not wanting to end up near anyone he didn’t know.

“Well, you can sit next to me if you want,” Alfred offered, patting the floor next to him for Arthur to sit.

“Thanks,” Arthur mumbled, all but gluing himself to Alfred’s side.

“Whose turn was it?” Alfred asked, glancing around at the group.

“It was yours, Alfred!” A girl- unfamiliar to Arthur- said, letting out a laugh.

“Okay! Well, everyone, Arthur’s here now. So Arthur... truth or dare?” Alfred gave Arthur a grin.

“I’m not some scaredy-cat like you, Alfred. I pick dare!” Arthur stuck his tongue out at his best friend, practically challenging him to say something bad.

“You still won’t tell me who you like, so you’re just begging for me to do something related to that,” Alfred announced.

Arthur’s face flushed.

“And since you didn’t pick truth, I dare you to kiss whoever you think is cutest in this truth or dare circle.” Alfred gently shoved Arthur’s shoulder.

A round of ‘ooh’s went around the circle, and Arthur felt sharp tears prick up behind his eyes. He didn’t want to lie. He didn’t want to lose his first kiss to someone he didn’t even care about. So he leaned over to his left and gently kissed Alfred’s lips. It was nice. Alfred’s lips were chapped, but that didn’t matter to Arthur. His heart felt like it was soaring.

“I- I really have to go, now.” Arthur slung his backpack higher on his back and practically ran out of the room.

“Arthur, wait!” Alfred shouted.

But Arthur didn’t care. There were two options. Arthur was going to leave or he was going to die. There was nothing else. Those two choices ran through his head as he ran down Alfred’s street.

He hadn’t been planning for anything like that to happen. He’d been planning to stay the night at Alfred’s after the party was over. Alfred was his best friend and he’d ruined all of it. He’d be an outcast and even Alfred would call him slurs.

Arthur ended up halfway down the street, sitting on the ground and sobbing into someone’s plants.

Arthur didn’t even stir when someone shook his shoulder.

“You know… I wouldn’t have an objection to kissing you again. Why do you think I’ve been trying to get to know your crush all these years? I wanted to know your type.” Alfred’s familiar voice was like honey to Arthur.

“My type,” Arthur muttered, slowly getting off of the ground, “is you!”

“Well that’s good, because you’re my type, too.” Alfred gently wrapped his arms around Arthur’s waist, nuzzling the other boy’s nose.

“So are we boyfriends now?” Arthur asked, adjusting his necktie.

“Do you wanna be my boyfriend?” Alfred  asked

“Of course. I haven’t done all of this to just be your friend.” Arthur pouted.

And they held hands even after they walked into Alfred’s house, laughing all the way.

[astralastrid]

I'll Be Home For Christmas

Hi @snowfairy909 ! I was your @usuknetwork holiday exchange Secret Santa! Happy holidays and enjoy!

Title: I'll Be Home For Christmas Prompt: Arthur coming over to London to surprise Alfred for Christmas Summary: Separated by distance, both Alfred and Arthur long for each other. Rating: general audiences Warnings: n/a Holidays were always a magical time for Alfred. He loved them as a child, and loved them still. He loved the certain feeling everything would get, the quiet serenity that came with snow, the holiday songs, the food, exchanging gifts, and the warm atmosphere of family. And even as everyone got older and went their separate ways, he still enjoyed calling everybody and seeing what they were up to. Unfortunately, this year, Alfred found himself spending these special days alone. 

His brother, Matthew, lived in Canada and couldn't make the trip, and he rather not bother his parents, even if he knew they'd always welcome him with open arms.

But mostly Alfred found himself longing for his boyfriend, Arthur. Alfred had met Arthur in a café, and the two had kept running into each other, which had sparked a friendship. The two texted back and forth, and even started to hang out, sometimes at the very café where they had first met.The two would discuss all sorts of things, often complaining about work. And while Alfred's own work stories were subpar, Arthur's, on the other hand, were extremely entertaining, and Alfred always looked forward to Arthur's latest tirade about his French co-worker. Over time, Alfred and Arthur became close, and friendship soon turned into love. 

 Unfortunately, Arthur had been working in London for the past year, and because of this, the two had rarely seen each other in person, Arthur visiting only when he could get the vacation time, and often he would just stay in England. Alfred dearly missed the sound of his angelic laugh, his rare, small smile, his doting yet brash personality, and especially his embrace. Webcam could only capture so much. 

Alfred decided to call Arthur. The phone rang and rang, but there was no response. His boyfriend's voice usually brought him joy, but this time, Arthur's familiar voicemail only added to the pang of loneliness he felt.

Alfred sighed, deciding to call his brother instead, who thankfully picked up. "Hey Al, everything alright?"

"Yeah, yeah, just relaxing you know? Anyway what's up bro? Have you put up your decorations?" Alfred looked around at his house, all decked out in holiday garb. His eyes lingered on the tree, and he felt a new wave of sadness come over him. Decorating was one of his favorite things to do with Arthur, and it was the first year in a while that they hadn't done it together.

"Well actually we're doing that now." The sound of a grunt came over the line as Matthew probably picked up something heavy. 

"Oh" Alfred said dejectedly. "Is now a bad time to call?" 

"No, no it's fine! It's always nice to hear from you, especially since I know you're busy this time of year." Matthew was too polite for his own good, and wouldn't admit that it was probably a hassle to balance the phone on top of putting things up. 

"No Mattie it's fine, I can call you back." There was a pause, and Alfred could almost see the worried expression on his sibling's face. 

"Alfred, I know you miss Arthur, but try not to let it take over your life eh? Order some pizza and watch a Hallmark movie or something. You love the holidays. Don't let this ruin it." 

alfred tried to smile. "Your right Matt, thanks. Love you."  

"Love you too. Talk to you later." Matthew had a point. Holidays were supposed to be fun! And by god, he was going to enjoy them! Alfred ordered a pizza, putting on "Elf," one of his favorite Christmas movies, and watching the snow fall. Maybe he'd make a snowman later... 

Over the next few days, Alfred tried to not think about Arthur too much, but it was hard when they did almost everything together during the season. It was strange to not smell burnt food coming from the oven or hear scathing remarks on the "cheesiness of American movies," (even if Arthur secretly enjoyed them.) Everything reminded Alfred of Arthur, and the holidays were going to be hard without the other half of his heart. 

                                                       *** 

 Arthur Kirkland had mixed feelings about holidays. He despised the commercialism of it all, the same bloody songs playing over and over, and above all, the crowds. And yet, he did enjoy the general giving spirit mankind was prone to at this time of year. Everyone and everything seemed a little brighter and a little kinder. Even his brothers seemed to tease him less during the holiday season. 

But this year, Christmas was turning out to be a little different. His job has asked him to work abroad for a year, and Arthur had happily accepted, eager to return to his homeland after years of being away from it. The experience was incredible: so much was the same, yet everything was a little bit different. So many of the shops he had known as a child were still there, but unfortunately a few had been closed down or demolished. Despite being busy with his work, Arthur had taken the time to "sightsee," refamiliarizing himself with the joys of his younger years, even taking the time to see his parents and catch up with them.

However, while it was great to see it all again, he found himself missing Alfred a lot, and the conversation he had with his parents didn't help. They were overjoyed to see him "across the pond," so to speak, and Arthur was thankful that they were so supportive of his relationship with Alfred, but it soon because all that they wanted to talk about: 'How was Alfred?' 'When was the last time you saw him?' 'Have you called him recently?' 'Don't you miss him?' 

 And yes, Arthur missed him dearly. London seemed much more gloomy and quiet than he remembered. He used to enjoy that aspect of London, but after meeting Alfred it was strange to go back to a less boisterous life. Everything seemed colder and lonelier without Alfred's warm touch, his larger-than-life laugh, his brighter-than-the-sun smile, and his overall sunny personality that filled whatever room he was in. Alfred had become a bigger part of Arthur's life than he realized, and he cursed the fact he couldn't always afford the plane ticket to see him. 

 Admittedly, Arthur had been so busy with work lately that he had missed numerous calls from Alfred, forgetting to call him back and mostly replying to him via text. It was all going to be worth it, but he still felt immensely guilty and decided to give Alfred a ring. 

 "Hello? Alfred?" 

 "Artie!" He could clearly picture the smile on his boyfriend's face. "Is everything ok? You hadn't called in a while..." His words were like a stab in the gut. 

 Arthur coughed awkwardly. "Yes, sorry about that love. I've been busier than I anticipated. But I'm fine I promise. Anything ah, new over there?" 

 "Nope! Just the usual: ice, snow, hot coco, and the "overly cliché" movies you love to hate. Oh and the oven isn't on fire for once." 

 Arthur reddened. "You leave me and my perfectly fine cooking skills alone!" 

Alfred laughed. "Whatever you say." There was a pause. "Hey Arthur?" 

 "Yes love?"

"It's really good to hear your voice. I really miss you." 

 Arthur smiled. "I miss you too poppet." They said their goodbyes and it was really hard for Arthur not to tell Alfred that he'd see him soon. See, the reason that Arthur had been so busy is that he had been working hard so that when he requested to go home for the holidays, it would seem like a reasonable request. It had taken a bit of wheedling on Arthur's part, but his boss had agreed to let him go. Arthur was scheduled to arrive on Christmas Eve, and he couldn't wait to surprise his boyfriend.

                                                       ***

Alfred had been watching "The Polar Express" and eating ice-cream when there was a knock on the door. Strange, he hadn't been expecting anyone... He paused the movie and put the ice-cream down, opening the door carefully. Seeing who it was, he swung the door wide open and crushed his boyfriend in a bear-hug. "Artie!" Arthur, while a little irritated at the lack of a warning, hugged back tightly. "I missed you so much it hurt Arthur!"  

"Merry Christmas Alfred. I missed you too. Now can we please go inside before we catch out deaths out here?" Alfred laughed, quickly letting him go and helping him with his belongings. 

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming home? I would've prepared something special!" And wouldn't have left the place in such a mess, Alfred added silently in his head. 

"I wanted to surprise you. Plus I knew you'd be all overly extravagant about it, and while I appreciate it, I rather just spend a few relaxing evenings with you." 

Alfred nodded. "I understand, but promise you'll let me take you out for New Year's! If you're staying that long. When are you going back? Are you here for good?" Alfred became frantic. "Or are they making you stay in London for good? Please don't tell me it's true Arthur! This year has been hard enough already! Another second without you and I'd die!" 

 Arthur scoffed. "Stop being so overdramatic." He gestured to the various trash scattered about. "You seem just fine. You sure you'd missed me?" At Alfred's indignant look, Arthur waved his hand dismissively. "I'm just joking. I'm home until after New Year's and then I have to return. But after that I should be wrapping up everything and returning for good before the month is out, promise." He went over and kissed him on the cheek. "But we can worry about that later. It's Christmas Eve! Let's just relax." 

 Alfred beamed. "You don't have to tell me twice!" Alfred made popcorn while Arthur brewed his tea, and the two soon returned to the couch, continuing to watch movies and cuddling up to each other. It didn't take long for them to fall asleep in the other's embrace. 

The next morning, Alfred shook Arthur excitedly. "Wake up Artie! It's Christmas!" Arthur groaned, trying to go back to sleep, but Alfred insisted, pulling the blankets off. 

 "Fine, fine, I'm up!" Arthur grumbled. 

 Alfred was smiling sheepishly as he handed him breakfast."I'm sorry I couldn't get you a proper gift this year. I wasn't expecting you to be home and frankly, I didn't know what to get you regardless. You have plenty of mugs and tea, and all your knitting stuff is in working condition-" 

 "Oh hush." Arthur interrupted. "It's okay love. Being with you is already the perfect gift." 

 Alfred smirked. "I thought you hated cheesy lines like that." Arthur scoffed and hit him playfully. "Seriously though. I'll make it up to you."

 Arthur smiled. "It's fine, don't worry. And don't you want to know what I got you?" He went over to his suitcase and brought out two wrapped presents. "I know how much you love Harry Potter, so I got you a robe, a wand, chocolate frogs, and Bertie Botts Every Flavor Beans." He explained as Alfred opened the presents.

 Alfred hugged him tightly. "Oh I love this! Thank you thank you!" Alfred put them out of harm's way. "So what now?" 

 "I just want to spend the day with you dearest." And that they did. They baked and cooked together, (Alfred being careful to watch Arthur's every move,) ate together, and Alfred even convinced Arthur to have a snowball fight with him. After that, they warmed back up with hot drinks and spent the rest of the evening snuggled up, watching whatever was on tv. 

 And later, Alfred did fulfill his promise to make it up to Arthur, taking him out on New Year's Eve and buying whatever he wanted from the stores that weren't closed, (despite Arthur's protests.) They went ice skating, and walked around town eating ice-cream. At night, they toasted to each other, sharing a kiss at midnight. And staring into each other's eyes lovingly, they both knew that their holidays would always be complete, so long as they had the other at their side.

[mayumi-sato]

Ocean... gems?

Summary: The answer part to @not-aph-england’s ‘Ocean Gems’ fanfiction written for the @usuknetwork​ valentine’s day event! I’m suuuper-late but well, I’m always late, sorry. hjklj You really have to read littlemaple’s part to have fun with this one so please do this now! 

Did you do that? Okay! Now, you can read this story!^__^

As soon as Alfred opened the letter that someone had left for him in his locker, he recognized his best friend’s handwriting in it.

How would he NOT recognize it? Arthur had been his friend for years. Of course he would immediately know that Arthur was the one who wrote that letter. Of course, it did help that Arthur’s handwriting looked almost like the signature of some poet from the 19th century.

It was a little strange to have Arthur send a letter to him instead of simply talking to him, but Alfred assumed that this was just, you know, Arthur’s style. That guy had a flair for the dramatics. He tried not to let his imagination fly high and simply assumed that in the letter, Arthur would invite him to a sleepover or something.

However…

There’s something I need to tell you, but I can’t tell you in person… I have admired you for a long time, and the more I can be around you, the more I’m sure of it. I love you. I know it’s strange, and weird, and I’m sorry.

…

Okay... Maybe that was just… a bro thing…  Maybe Arthur was just admitting timidly how much his friendship meant to him...

I love your chubby cheeks, mostly when they’re blushing, and I’d love to hug you, and kiss you.

Oh right, that definitely wasn’t looking platonic now. Alfred felt his whole face burn as he read this line. He had to cover his mouth with his hand in order to not scream a loud "whaaaat?" in the middle of the hall.

Holy crap. Arthur liked him! Arthur liked him back! That was aweso...!

And again, I’m sorry if this is all too weird… I wish I could tell you all this in person, but I know you don’t like guys, so I settle for an anonymous letter in your locker.

Wait, what?

From your secret admirer.

What the…

Was that a joke?

Had Arthur just confessed to him as a SECRET ADMIRER???? What could Alfred do with that information now?! That was bullshit!

Now he knew that Arthur liked him, but he couldn’t even say "hey, I like you back" because there was a slight chance that that person who sent the letter wasn’t Arthur and if Alfred confessed that might lead to a disastrous outcome in their relationship!

Why had Arthur signed as a secret admirer? Knowing that there was a chance they liked each other, without him being able to say anything about it, was so much worse than being resigned with the idea that Arthur would never give him a chance!

What Alfred could do now?

Later that day when Arthur was getting ready for his next class, Alfred pulled him by the shoulder.

“Hey, Artie. What is this?” he asked, trying to sound very casual and not at all jumping of excitement inside.

He showed Arthur the letter from his ‘secret admirer’. He wanted to ease the situation for both of them by giving Arthur a chance to tell the truth.

“Uh… a… letter?” Arthur sounded almost robotic as he asked that, making the fakest confused expression in the history of mankind.

“Well, yes, but you know what kind of letter this is?! Read it!” Alfred shoved the paper in Arthur’s hands.

For a moment, it was as if Arthur had forgotten how to read. He took such a long time to read that letter and his eyes seemed to be pausing over every little word.

“It’s a love letter?”, he finally answered.

Oh gosh. Some progress, finally!

Alfred nodded enthusiastically. He didn’t want to give away everything that he knew on a nice plate to Arthur just yet. He couldn’t just ask, "Is this your letter?" with Arthur pretending to be an idiot like that. He had better play it safe as well.

“Yeah! Isn’t that cool? A love letter!”, Alfred exclaimed, trying to pretend he was just really excited about love letters in general.

Arthur's reaction to that was of legitimate puzzlement.

“Why are you so happy?”

“Because someone’s got a crush on me?” ‘and this person is probably you?’ Alfred thought to himself.

“But… it’s a guy?”

Alfred had no idea where Arthur had come to the conclusion that he was straight. Apparently, Arthur had world views as heteronormative as a Christmas special made for television.

“I know!” Alfred spoke in a slightly impatient tone.

He knew it, he knew it! He knew it was a guy! He knew it was Arthur! It was so frustrating to have to walk in circles that way! Still... Tsk. If that was Arthur's pace to come in terms with his feelings, Alfred had to respect him. He had to patiently introduce the idea to Arthur that he was more than welcome with the idea that his best friend was his secret admirer.

Pulling himself together in a matter of seconds, he added with a big smile:

“I like girls better, but boys are cool too.”

Boom, there it was. The big revelation. Now, would Arthur finally be brave enough to admit his feelings?

“Oh.”

... That was all Arthur had to say on the subject. Oh, man. That sucked.

Wouldn’t he say anything else about the subject, really? What was holding Arthur now? If his only fear was that Alfred was straight, then there were no more obstacles ahead. He should simply throw himself into Alfred's arms and say, "Oh, Alfred, I've always loved you, and to be honest, I think you're more handsome than Chris Evans!"

Seeing Arthur's reaction made a small murmur go through Alfred's thoughts. Perhaps… Perhaps his secret admirer really wasn’t Arthur. Perhaps there was another person who embodied a Victorian ghost while writing something. What if Alfred made a mistake?

“So, I was thinking you could help me try to find out who it is? It’d be cool,” he ended up proposing to Arthur. That seemed like the best solution to the situation.

In the best of scenarios, Arthur would eventually muster up the courage to admit that the letter had been written by him. In the worst of scenarios, Arthur would help him find out who his true admirer was.

It was a win-win situation.

Arthur had accepted to help Alfred find his secret admirer, but one day later, he hadn’t done anything about it yet. He was completely silent on the subject, as if that conversation had never happened. So Alfred ended up having to push him a bit on the topic while they were walking  home after school.

“Who do you think it is?” he asked, giving Arthur a side glance.

His friend, oddly enough, reacted as if Alfred had just stepped on his foot, making a resentful face with slight remnants of pain in it.

“How am I supposed to know?” he asked in a louder voice.

Sheesh. Did he have to come to the attack like that? What was his motive for acting like that? Was it possible that his secret admirer wasn’t Arthur and he was jealous now?

Ahhh, it would be totally great if that was the case.

“I dunno,” Alfred laughed fondly and joyfully, “just, what do you think from what you read? What kind of person do you think he is?”

Arthur's reaction at that moment was quite incriminating.

He gave a long sigh and replied, blushing, his hands in his pockets and his eyes turned to the ground:

“Uh, it looks like it’s someone who really likes you… but is kind of shy… and who… really pays attention to all you do…”

Good lord. His admirer had to be Arthur. Why on earth would he feel so shy about someone else? That dummy. He was such a terrible liar. Alfred had to laugh about it, man.

Arthur got suspicious of this reaction so Alfred just shook his head and patted Arthur on the back.

“Oh, nevermind, I just remembered that video I sent you last night… what were you saying again?”

Alfred couldn’t even get upset when Arthur muttered that he was being stupid. Honestly, who was the one being stupid there?

More days passed and Alfred made further attempts to make Arthur admit that he was his secret admirer. He even arranged a list of several people he suspected could be his admirer just to see if jealousy would make Arthur react.

Well, in a way it worked. Arthur seemed a bit grumpy looking at that list. However, his words on the subject remained distant and ambiguous. "Oh, I don’t know. It can be anyone." It was so frustrating to hear that.

There was a limit to how much Alfred could pretend he was an idiot. That same afternoon, he noticed Arthur staring at him as if he were almost mesmerized while they were doing homework in the library. It was ridiculously obvious. Arthur was not subtle at all. Even his letter hadn’t been subtle either.

In fact, it can be said that Alfred could be much more subtle than Arthur since, despite knowing the truth about what was going on, he wasn’t letting Arthur notice that he knew.

Then came the second letter and it had a “Arthur wrote it” feel all over it, even more so than the first one. Seriously, that guy was a complete sucker in disguising himself. He mentioned the way Alfred's eyes flashed when he won a game when Arthur was the only person with whom he played anything personally. Could he be any more obvious?

After reading this letter, Alfred wanted to run to Arthur, hold his shoulders and scream in his face "I like you back! Can’t you see that?!" He couldn’t understand how could Arthur, who was usually so clever, not realize something that obvious.

Once more, he brought the letter from his ‘secret admirer’ for Arthur to see and asked what he thought of it.

Arthur simply shrugged.

“It’s kinda sappy and abstract… but you know what? I dig it. It’s nice,” Alfred said and seeing the little smile that appeared on Arthur's face when he heard it, he couldn’t resist teasing him a bit, “I don’t get how my eyes can be both oceans and gems but I don’t get poetry so whatever,” he joked, but then added in a more serious tone, giving Arthur a meaningful look “I think it’s cute.”

He wasn’t just talking about poetry when he said that.

Arthur, however, paid no attention to this. He seemed lost in his thoughts and almost as if he was choosing what emotion he should feel at that moment. Alfred took advantage of the fact that he was distracted to take a good look at him. Arthur was so adorable. It was almost unfair that anyone could be that cute.

Alfred really wanted to be able to kiss those thin, rosy lips, pressed against each other because of Arthur's level of concentration. It was getting harder and harder to be patient and wait for Arthur to admit his feelings on his own.

“You know, after the first letter I asked Gilbert to check my locker because I was sure I’d get a second one… ” he bluffed, trying to push Arthur into action.

“Yeah?” Arthur asked in his robotic voice again.

“Yeah, and Gilbert said he saw you around my locker…”

That was a total lie but it did manage to get a reaction out of Arthur. Not a good reaction, though.

Arthur didn’t look adorably embarrassed, as Alfred guessed he would. Instead, he seemed about to faint. All the blood seemed to drain from his face and he gave Alfred a look of utter terror.

Alfred felt guilty. He didn’t want to see Arthur like this. Arthur maybe wasn’t ready to reveal his feelings yet and it was wrong of Alfred to keep pressing him... He didn’t know why Arthur didn’t confess directly to him but he could have some valid reasons for it. Therefore, to force a confession out of him would be the action of a villain.

“… But, duh, I mean, your locker is close to mine, of course you’d be nearby. Gilbert didn’t pay enough attention…” Alfred said, trying to calm him down.

However, at that point, it was too late. The damage was already done. Artie was clearly pissed at him. He grimaced at Alfred for the rest of his walk home.

Alfred wasn’t sure of how to fix the situation.

“So… what do you think about coming to my place so you can help me narrow my options as to who sent me the letter?” he suggested with a smile. Maybe if they were alone, he could explain himself to Arthur and…

“I’m tired, why don’t you go ask someone else to help you? How about Kiku?” Arthur snapped. Oh, man. He was seriously pissed off.

Maybe Alfred should just go straight to the point.

“Nah, we don’t need that, do we?” Alfred answered, and then he winked.

So Arthur would see that they didn’t need to run in circles. It was mutual! It was…!

“No, thank you,” Arthur said and ran to his house.

Everything seemed absolutely fucked.

“ ... so that's why I was happy to see you here today. I thought I was so screwed, man,” Alfred finished explaining his point of view of the last days to an awe-struck Arthur.

It was Sunday, it was raining, and Arthur came, almost out of nowhere, to confess that it was him who had written the letters. The way he'd said things, it seemed that he was expecting the worst possible scenario. Alfred couldn’t understand at all how he assumed it when Alfred had clearly shown in the last few days that he was available and willing to go out with guys.

“That doesn’t mean anything!” Arthur exclaimed after hearing his version of the facts and his argument which, by the way, made perfect sense. "You liking men wouldn’t necessarily mean that you would like me!"

“Come on, Arthur. Any guy our age who is attracted to men would be attracted to you,” Alfred replied, rolling his eyes, and Arthur immediately blushed in response. He was so adorable. So freaking adorable.

"A-Anyway... Everything could have been solved much easily if you had said that you knew about the letters!”

"Well, everything could have been solved so much easily if you had just confessed directly to me from the start!”

Arthur had absolutely no argument to rebutt Alfred, so he just grabbed his face and pulled him into a kiss to distract him. The worst part was that that dirty tricky actually worked. For the rest of that rainy afternoon, Alfred completely forgot what they were discussing before and focused only on feeling Arthur’s touches.

[magic-magpie]

I’d Give Anything to be the One You Love

I haven’t written anything in a while. Well, I have, but they’re kinda larger fics that take a bit more time. And I wanted to write something quick and easy, so I wrote this. I like writing these kind of letters. Also, I’ve been considering a career in journalism in case I don’t get good enough grades for medical school, but I’m really disappointed with the annual salary. I mean, I live for money and aspire to be one of those people who live in manors, and journalism just wouldn’t let me do that. Which is sad, because I like writing and journalism really does sound interesting. Anyway, you’re probably not interested in my career woes, so here’s the story. UsUk, as per usual.

Word count - 2,093

Dear Alfred,

I finally succumbed. I finally gave in to Francis' constant pestering.

I'm finally writing this letter to you.

I'm not going to send it, of course. I mean, what sort of idiocy would THAT be?! I've worked so hard for two-and-a-half years to keep my feelings a secret – do you honestly think I'd just throw all that away in a hastily-scribbled letter?

Okay, well, I'm lying about the hastily-scribbled part. I'm using my best cursive here (the type of cursive that you can actually read, because I know you and your problem with my copperplate), along with the parchment I bought from the Harry Potter Studios that time we went together, and my best ink and quill. This letter is a work of art that shall never see the light of day, but shall forever be locked away in my easily-accessible drawer.

Perhaps I should invest in a padlock.

Francis would call it a shame, locking this letter away. He'd tell me to send it to you, to slide it into your bag one day when you're not paying attention (which, let's be real, is a lot of the time). But... that's easy for him to say. Remember when he confessed to Matthew with one of those Valentine's Day roses school did, and Matthew accepted? Francis has never been rejected before, he doesn't know what it feels like. Nor do I, for that matter... you're the only one I've ever had feelings for.

But that's beside the point; the point being that Francis is so sure of himself, so sure of his charm and irresistibility. He knows he's conventionally attractive, and he knows that people have had crushes on him. Me, on the other hand? My hair's wiry and messy and the kind of blond that nobody writes about. It's not platinum blond, not golden, not dirty blond. It's just... my hair. And who on Earth would find THAT attractive? More importantly, why would YOU find that attractive, when you have golden hair that shines distractingly in the sunlight? And then there's my eyes. Sure, they're green, which is interesting I suppose, but they're not the brilliant green people fall in love with. My eyes wouldn't remind you of a forest on a summer's day or some such romantic shit; they'd probably remind you of murky waters or empty wine bottles.

Your eyes, on the other hand... God, your eyes. This probably sounds strange, but from the very first moment I met you your eyes have captivated me. Not in a romantic way (at first), but... there's just something about them that makes me feel I can get lost in them. They're so blue. And they sparkle. And shine. And shimmer. Like an ocean on a sunny day, or a night sky out in the countryside. They're two widely different blues, but... you have them both. And you also have these little flecks of green. I first noticed them a couple of years ago (when I'd just realised that I'd fallen for you) and... they made me absurdly happy? Like... there was a little part of my eyes within yours. Honestly though, the green in your eyes looks so good. The flecks are like little leaves drifting across a wide, shimmering ocean.

In case you hadn’t already realised what the subject of this letter is about, I'll go ahead and state it.

I, Arthur Kirkland, am hopelessly in love with you, Alfred Foster Jones.

I don't even know how it HAPPENED. One minute we were meeting in English class in Year Seven, then we became good friends, then REALLY good friends, then I suddenly realised that the thoughts I'm having concerning you aren't entirely friend-like. I started craving your company more and more, wanting to sit opposite you in the lunch hall before anyone else could, looking for excuses to spend time as just the two of us. At the time I just thought that you'd become a really close friend, but then... I don't know when exactly it hit. All I know is that I started thinking about how fun it would be to go on a date with you, to hold you in my arms and stroke your soft blond hair as we lament over exams and watch 'Harry Potter' and discuss Shakespeare but in space.

I think other people noticed how much I thrived on your company – Francis noticed to the point that he figured out that I like you. When you were absent for one reason or another our friends would be quick to remark how I looked 'lost' without you. Personally, I don't think I looked lost, but I can't deny that I was quieter when you weren't around. Still am, apparently. And, well, I kind of FEEL a little... lonelier? It's as if there's something... missing, when you're not around. Of course, I never feel like this when you're not supposed to be there. My free periods without you, for example. I never miss you then. But lunchtime when you're not there? It's fun, but I definitely feel the difference. And it's not a nice difference. I like having you around; you make me want to try new things, you make me want to be daring, you make me want to put myself out there without worrying about the consequences. I suppose... I suppose you make me want to improve myself into someone who stands a chance with you.

Then there’s the matter of, well... of me. Oh God, this feels so awkward to write, but you’re, well, you’re bisexual. Which means that you... like sex. And me? I don’t.

I really don’t want sex.

I like... the IDEA of sex. As in, bondage is cool. Handcuffs and blindfolds are fucking hot, let me tell you. Humiliation play? Magnificent masturbation material. And don’t even get me started on the notion of slowly dragging a riding crop down someone’s body. But that’s the thing. I like all this, but in THEORY. I like the idea of it, the notion. Actually doing all this, though?

No thank you.

And, well... I worry that if, by some sort of miracle, you actually love me back, you’ll... get bored of me. I wouldn’t be able to sexually satisfy you. I’d probably try, but I wouldn’t be able to. I know that you’re not the type to cheat, and I’d never say there was even a possibility, but... look, I know full well that you wouldn’t ever even think of falling out of love with me (or anyone, for that matter) just because I’m asexual, but I can’t help but worry, you know? I don't like the thought of being dropped because I can't give you everything you want. Rejection, I... I don't like it. It was bad enough when my father left us all, claiming that he couldn't deal with such a large family because there were 'too many mouths to feed'. I get where he was coming from, but if he had kids he should've been prepared to look after them all their lives. But no, instead he leaves us, leaves me just a few months before my GCSEs, leaves me feeling like shit and wondering if he would've stayed if I, as the fourth and last child, hadn't been born. It was a situation out of my control, but it still left me with a bitter sense of inadequacy. And if you leave me just because I can't make love to you... it'd hurt like hell. You're not that type of person, I know you're not, but you can't fault a bloke for worrying, not when he's already had a sense of inadequacy planted in him.

...All this worrying over a non-existent relationship. Wow. I’ve sunk to a new low.

Also, as a point of interest, I just read this letter back to myself and now I’m blushing heavily because I just told you my kinks. Who even has the stupidity to write their kinks in a letter?

Moving on from kinks...

So... yeah. I’m not entirely sure of what else to write. I’ve already said that I’m hopelessly in love with you, haven’t I? God, you don’t make it easy to fall out of love with you, do you? You laugh in such an obnoxious, sincere way at my sarcastic quips and dry humour that makes my chest feel funny. Your laugh, it’s... it’s kind of cute. It starts off with this loud, sudden ‘Ha!’ and then you dissolve into raucous giggles, having to steady yourself on the nearest solid thing you can find, the corners of your eyes crinkling and your glasses sliding down the bridge of your nose. When you’ve got a bright idea it almost... takes over you. In a good way. You almost... shine. You talk about it as if it's an idea you’ve been passionately advocating for since forever, as opposed to five minutes ago. And when you’re talking about your latest achievement? God, you’re adorable.

And then sometimes you wear tight tee-shirts that emphasise your rather impressive physique and my mouth goes dry and I momentarily forget how to function. On other occasions you wear baggy hoodies with floppy sleeves and I still momentarily forget how to function.

I think there’s just something about you which makes me momentarily forget how to function.

Also, you’re cute when you’re sleepy. You sort of forget that I hate being touched (by anyone but you, but I’ll never admit that anywhere but here) and just... flop all over me. Sometimes it’s your head in my lap, sometimes it’s your legs. Sometimes your head’s on my shoulder, sometimes your arm’s draped around them. I act disgruntled, but honestly... I like it. I like the fact that I’m the person you flop all over when tired. I like the fact that when something exciting happens, I’m the first person you tell. I like the fact that, well, you value me so much. It feels... nice.

Honestly, I know these unrequited feelings are going to kill me one day (not literally, don’t worry). I can picture myself forcing smiles at your wedding to a beautiful stranger with bright eyes and soft hair, see myself drinking myself silly whilst you’re on your honeymoon and making love to the person of your dreams, see myself letting envy consume me as I wallow in self-pity and wonder where I went wrong in not managing to gain your romantic affections.

But... that’s my headache. I’ll never let on that I love you. I’ll only tell you if you tell me that you return my feelings. Because I know you. You’ll feel bad about rejecting me. And the last thing I want to do is make you feel bad.

Just know, Alfred, that whoever you fall in love with, I’ll support you through the ups and the downs of your relationship. You can cry on my shoulder if need be. I’ll help plan your wedding, if you want me to. I’ll only try and end it if your partner is abusive, or an arsehole, or treats you like shit, because you don’t deserve that. You deserve someone who will love you as wholeheartedly as you’ll love them.

...Marvellous, now I want to give this to you so that you see my nice supportive messages. But no, I won’t. Because then you’d see everything else, and that would go against every single one of my morals. So, I just hope that you know all that already. You should, theoretically. I can’t imagine you would keep me so close to you if you thought that I’d ever stop being supportive of you.

So, well, here ends my letter. My letter that I’m just going to stuff in my drawer and hope that none of my brothers ransack it. I suppose I feel a little bit more... at ease about all this.

I love you, Alfred. I hope you know that. Even if you just think it’s platonic.

Love,

Arthur.

P.S. Is it bad that I’ve imagined what our first date would be? I imagine that we’d go to a theme park and ride all the rollercoasters, then we’d go to McDonalds. Then we'd go back to your house and we'd hang out in your room and drink hot chocolate with marshmallows and rainbow sprinkles in our favourite mugs and play video games and board games and watch films on your bed until we end up falling asleep on each other.

P.P.S. God, I'd give anything for you to love me back.

P.P.P.S. Anything.

[gallifreyanlibertea]

Sweet (2/2)

click here for part one 

“In this round, you will be given a recipe to recreate.” Arthur paused for a smile, “However, there is a catch.”

This elicited impatient groans from the two competitors left remaining.

“You will be given extra ingredients to incorporate into the deserts, and you will have ninety minutes to complete this task.”

Arthur waited as the recipe cards were delivered to the two remaining contestants. He would do a voice-over later, but as of now, he would pause and give them a moment or two to read what was given to them.

See, this was the sad part. With round seven, there were only two contestants left, and Arthur liked to think he knew them. He liked to think the weeks he’d spent hosting them had softened him a bit, just a little bit, yes.

However, with this case in particular- Arthur cast a glance in Alfred’s direction as the man looked up from his instructions, a beaming smile spreading slowly on his features-

Arthur decided Alfred Jones had softened him up more than just a bit.

“Ready, set, bake!”

The two contestants scrambled to begin the recipe and Arthur found himself biting back a sigh.

What would come of him if he let himself be swept away by any man who considered him slightly attractive? It was ridiculous, really, that Arthur had forgotten the extent of his homosexuality until Alfred Jones happened upon him.

Sigh.

Arthur could still remember it now... he doubted he’d ever be forgetting it, not soon, at least.

“The theme for today is beauty.” He had remembered saying, not too long ago, to a room of four contestants, “You will be given ninety minutes to embody this theme through the desert of your choice.”

Arthur had been excited to see the results of that round in particular, seeing as one of the contestants had told him he would be making edible roses, and god, did Arthur love the idea of that. He was a man that knew to appreciate the beauty of things. That was why he’d asked to include the theme for this season, yes, despite not being able to eat the actual creations.

“What do we have here?” Arthur had said inquisitively, peering into Alfred’s station.

“I’m making a cake.” Alfred said, with a boyish smile.

Arthur paused, waiting for elaboration. There was none. “And what shall I expect from you in this round?”

“I think you’ll like it.” Was Alfred’s sly reply and he turned his back. “Or, at least, I hope you will.”

Nothing in that exchange of words would have led Arthur to even thinking about what Alfred had ended up presenting at the end of the round, nothing at all.

After all, why would Arthur even expect Alfred’s idea of beauty to center around… well, him?

“I decided to make a cake based on someone I’ve admired since I started to watch this show. From its very first episode.”

Francis’ lips had quirked up in a smile, because, well, who else could it have been but him? He was the head of the show, the judge, the celebrity with an international reputation for exquisite cakes and pastries, so naturally, anyone aspiring to enter the field would adore him.

Yet “Arthur Kirkland” was the name that fell out of Alfred’s lips, and Arthur wasn’t the only one whose lips parted in a gasp.

“That’s right, Arthur Kirkland.” Alfred called with a point, “You’re beautiful, baby!”

Francis seemed taken aback, “Oh!”

Alfred continued, “Yeah, I’ll admit I’ve had a crush on you for a year now, going strong.”

Every single person and camera in the room turned to Arthur for a witty reply. They received a sputter- “Um, well, uh- wow, I… wow.”

Arthur then straightened up, clearing his throat with a smile for the cameras, “Well, then, I suppose I should be involved in tasting this.”

“There’s a reason I’m the judge and not you.” Was Francis’ reply, with a laugh from the competitors.

“A cake representing Arthur Kirkland, wow.” Francis had then turned down to the plate, carving out a piece of the cake to taste. He paused, then tasted the mint ice cream next to it. He looked back up. “I’m sorry, but I just don’t get this.”

Alfred’s expression went slack.

“This cake is far too sweet and delicious to represent a man so salty and bitter.”

“Oh, can it.” Arthur had snapped in reply, cheeks aflame, and Alfred’s lips spread in the brightest smile known to man.

“Come, Arthur, see how you taste.” Francis had said.

That memory in particular didn’t help the fact that Arthur felt his heart drop as he saw Alfred leave his dessert in the oven for too long. Arthur wasn’t completely devoid of feelings, especially not to a man who’d crafted a whole bloody cake in Arthur’s honor, one that had tasted absolutely divine, by the way.

It had tasted so divine that, despite not being prompted to, he had stepped away from Francis’ side that day to reward a laughing Alfred with a hug and a slight peck to the cheek.

“Thank you, Alfred my dear, the cake is lovely.”

“That’s it, I can go home now.” Alfred had said, bright red in the face. He’d then turned to the camera. “Can you believe it, mom? A kiss from Arthur Kirkland?”

He was absolutely charming. It was why Francis turned to Arthur with worry in his eyes, at the smell of burning cake. Arthur then turned to the clock. “Thirty minutes left!”

It was times like these that made Arthur hate his job.

Well, not quite. Sometimes, he absolutely loved what he did. Just two weeks ago, he’d gone to the contestants’ houses for a personal interview! It was interesting to see how a personality was reflected in the interior of a house, and he’d gotten to meet lots of beautiful pets, it was quite easily heaven.

“Oh!” He’d gasped as he was greeted with a bark upon opening Alfred’s door.

Alfred’s house had been something Arthur had, with shame, looked forward to for the entire day, going as far as cutting the other interviews just a tad bit short.

The producers had let it slide with smug smiles, but, see, Arthur’s intentions were nothing of that sort. He was only looking out for the show! There was no doubt viewers everywhere wanted a closer look at Alfred Jones, come on! He was practically a ray of sunshine in the kitchen- not to mention, a ray of sunshine in the looks department as well- and Arthur had definitely just been looking out for the show.

“Sorry about that.” Alfred had said with a laugh, “Hero’s a sweetie, he’s just excited.”

“Well, nice to meet you, Hero.” Arthur had said with a polite smile.

“Come on in, I made you some tea!”

Oh. Arthur turned to the cameras with an incredulous look. It’s not as if he’d never been offered food at this stage of the interviewing process before. It had always been, well, sweets. That was the whole point of the show, really, and people often took this as a chance to impress Arthur with biscuits or cupcakes.

“Don’t worry, I know just how you like it.” Alfred had said with a wink, sliding the cup across the dining room table, “I couldn’t find the cookies you normally drink your tea with, so you’ll have to settle for the ones I just made.”

Arthur turned to the cameras with a laugh. “Alfred Jones, where even did you get all this information about me? Are you in some sort of fanclub of mine?”

“Am I in a fanclub?” Alfred had said, “Baby, I run ‘em all.”

And those biscuits had been delicious. Arthur had practically inhaled them, to which Alfred had laughed, “You’re getting crumbs all over yourself!”

Arthur didn’t like to think of what had happened next, because frankly, he’d spent days trying to forget about the warm hand that had come to cradle the side of his face, thumb sweeping at Arthur’s bottom lip. “There, all gone.”

Needless to say, Francis and the producers had both had a field day viewing the footage, cooing and blowing kisses at a flustered Arthur who’d taken to burying his reddened face in his palms.

Although, Arthur would’ve rather had Francis taunt him to no end than to have him look at Arthur with those furrowed brows of his, lips turned down in an expression Arthur found himself mirroring.

Alfred just hadn’t been on his game today. That was all. The boy had managed to make it to the semi final round, for hell’s sake!

But that cake of his was positively burnt.

“Ten minutes left!”

The other contestant seemed to be doing better, and Arthur wanted to curse. He wanted to yell, he wanted to dip his hands into the immaculate frosting on her cake and scramble it all up if it meant Alfred would move on to the final round against Francis himself, because if Arthur knew anything, it was that Alfred had the potential to be so great.

He supposed that thought was a bit biased. “Step away from your creations!”

Alfred hung his head in shame and Arthur found himself having to look away.

This was the sad part.

It took years of training for Arthur to be where he was, yet no amount of training could take the part away from him, or from Francis, or anyone for the matter, that let them feel for the blue-eyed man who’d been eliminated in the semi-final round.

“I guess I was just being too ambitious.” Was Alfred’s final comment, “I tried to do too much and neglected the basics.”

Francis had nodded sympathetically.

And Alfred had turned to walk out of the door.

Of course, he wasn’t actually going anywhere, no, he would just be led into the interview room. But it was definitely the end for him. Arthur tried not to think about it as he turned to the final contestant.

“So, as the remaining contestant, do you think you have what it takes to claim the Sugar Daddy title from our reigning Sugar Daddy, Francis Bonnefoy?”

The cameras would stop rolling after the contestant’s reply, because unlike what showed up on television, there was a nice, long break for recovery after every round. This was to Arthur’s benefit, seeing as he desperately needed to sit down for a while.

“What a bummer.” He whispered, and Francis nodded.

“I saw a potential in that Jones boy.”

Arthur had nothing to say in response.

He supposed one could call him impartial, but that was definitely not the case. Despite the fact that Arthur was… well there was no use denying it now, he supposed. Arthur was attracted to the man, and despite the fact that one could have every suspicion of finding him impartial, it didn’t take much to tell that Alfred Jones was sweet and deserving of some sort of prize. There was real talent in the boy.

Arthur walked out the doors with a fleeting smile at the one remaining contestant that met his gaze. He then turned and halted, knocking against the door where the interviews were being conducted.

A cameraman peeked out from behind it. “Yes, Mr. Kirkland?”

“I, um, figured I should say something.” Arthur stammered, thinking to add you know, for the ratings? But there was no need. The man smiled and Arthur was allowed in.

Alfred glanced up with wide eyes, standing almost immediately, brushing down the wrinkles in his shirt, “Oh, hey there!”

“You should be proud of yourself for making it this far.” Arthur said, and Alfred paused, meeting Arthur’s gaze with a slight smile.

“Thank you, that means a lot.”

“Uh-”

Arthur had been heroic in storming into the interview room, but he found he had nothing much else to say. He glanced behind the cameras to find a camera man gesturing.

Go on!

“Uh, I... come here-” Arthur didn’t do this much, and it was pretty apparent on his face as he inched in for a hug. It’s not as if he didn’t want to hug Alfred, no, definitely not, seeing as the last time he’d done it, he’d been too reluctant to break away from that warm embrace.

A bit too reluctant.

It was just the way he seemed to fit right between Alfred’s arms. Arthur didn’t like to parade around the fact that he was on the smaller side, but it was made obvious in situations such as these, where he found his face buried into the crook of Alfred’s neck, for all the viewers to see.

Although, this hug was a bit different from the last one. It didn’t quite involve the awkward-back-clapping, and Arthur wasn’t sure what that meant.

“This right here, this is all the winning I need.” Alfred said with a laugh and Arthur pulled away with a polite smile, trying not to think about the muscle he’d felt behind that shirt or the fact that Alfred smelled like cake.

The cameramen were having the time of their lives, of course, beckoning behind Alfred’s back for Arthur to continue with something, anything.

Alfred liberated Arthur from having to think of a dialogue. “I’m so honored to have finally gotten to meet you.”

“The competition’s over, lad, you don’t need to keep buttering me up.” Arthur said with a tight laugh, by which Alfred didn’t seem to be humored. Not one bit. Arthur let the laugh subside into a rather nervous smile, one uncharacteristic by a trained host, but he found that there was not much else he could do with himself.

“I mean it.” Alfred said. “I’ve watched every show you’ve hosted. You’ve got such sparkling wit, you just light up the room... you’re- god, I can’t speak, you’re so hot.”

Alfred had laughed to punctuate the compliment, but Arthur found himself beyond numb.

He was used to this! This wasn’t the first time a contestant had called him ‘hot’. It had, however, been the first time one had said it to him after losing, having no reason to do so for their own personal gain.

Perhaps that was why Arthur kissed him.

It was only a tiny peck on the lips, but the camera men were delighted. “And we thought you had no heart, Kirkland!”

Arthur parted his lips for a snarky reply, and he’d almost delivered it too, hadn’t it been for the warm hands that pulled his face back into a kiss. Arthur didn’t know when he’d imagined it happening, but he found that it was just how he’d expected it to be. Alfred positively devoured him and Arthur had nowhere else to put his hands but to cup Alfred’s face, finding Alfred smiling into the kiss in response to the action.

Arthur pulled away with a pop and an incredulous part of his lips, and Alfred’s smile melted away.

“God, I have no idea what came over me… I’m so sor-”

“No, it’s… I’m-” Arthur said, no, Arthur stammered. “It’s fine! I’m, um, fine. I’ve got to shoot in a few minutes, though, and-”

“What he means to ask is if the production crew could give him your number.” The cameraman urged, to which Arthur cleared his throat.

“Yes, I’ll… I’ll call you... um, can I? Can I call you? Uh-”

“You’ll call me.” Alfred echoed, as if he couldn’t believe the words.

“Better yet-” Francis began, and when did he even get here? Perhaps while Alfred was snogging Arthur like no tomorrow- yes, Arthur vaguely remembered a door creaking open, but, well, he had other things on his mind that took importance over figuring out the source of the irrelevant noise. Clearly.  “After shooting, we like to go out to dinner. How about you tag along and keep Arthur company? Since he’s too good to talk to any of us.”

Damn it, Arthur was a trained host! He made money off of talking, yet he found that his lips preferred to stay shut as blue eyes bore into his.

“Do you think that’d be okay?” Alfred asked, blue eyes inquisitive.

Arthur nodded.

Alfred’s grin grew along with the smile on Arthur’s lips. 

“Sweet!”

[ellana-ravenwood]

Fate is a bitch (2) - Bruce Wayne x Reader

Well, originally this story wasn’t suppose to have a second part but tons of people asked me so, here’s a second part :-). I hope you will like it : 

FINISHED SERIES : PART 1

My master list blog : @ella-ravenwood-archives

_________________________________________________

Destiny. 

You strongly believed in Destiny. 

No matter what people could say, how many arguments against it they had, and how much they were sceptic about it…it wouldn’t change your mind. You strongly believed in Destiny.

Because it was impossible only coincidences brought you were you were now…At your wedding with the famous Bruce Wayne. 

************

It all happened about four years ago, when your son, Billy, somehow ended up getting caught by the Justice League and you almost used your elemental powers on them and punched Superman and...it was kind of a mess. 

Basically, you ended up being part of the League. 

Which was something, for someone like you, who was from a poor neighborhood, who had so many struggles in life and who found a kid once, a kid who was living in an abandoned station of the subway (you don’t even remember what brought you there...well, Destiny obviously), a kid who changed your life, and that you just had to adopt. 

At barely 25 years old. Oh the struggles were no where near to end. 

Then you met that guy, that dark and broody guy who stood up for your son when everyone else wanted to “fire” him from the League because he was but a ten years old child.

And that always seemed to smile when you were in the vicinity, though according to everyone else, the Batman never smiled. It was weird right ? And you caught yourself more than once wishing he was smiling because you were there, but it was impossible. 

Sure you and him always seemed to be able to talk about anything without any restrain, like you felt you could tell him everything on your heart, and more often than not, he talked to you about his own troubles and fears...The Batman, talking to you about his troubles and fears ! But it was impossible.

Oh you fell for him pretty fast, and hard, so so hard...But you thought it as impossible. He was older, he was clearly a man with tons of issues that couldn’t hold a relationship (according to his Bruce Wayne persona), he was the goddamn Batman...It just couldn’t be ! 

And yet. Yet. Your sons set you up. Damian and Billy. They tricked you into coming to dinner to the Wayne Manor and...Then Bruce fucked everything up. He avoided you. He stopped talking to you..Because he was afraid to drag you into his dark life. 

But when you almost died, and stayed in a coma for three months. When he just had to take care of your son and make sure you were gonna be alright...He realized that, well, destiny. 

And that’s when things started to get crazy. 

************

All the media could talk about was that “mysterious woman” who seemed to have caught Bruce Wayne’s heart. 

You have no idea how, but they knew everything about you (which made you wonder why they called you “mysterious woman”...what the hell ?). They knew Bruce was twelve years older, they knew you already had a son, they knew you were almost poor (with an emphasis on this because of course you’re after the Wayne fortune !), they knew you were originally from Gotham but went to live elsewhere later, they knew;..they knew everything ! 

It was difficult at first, especially when all the questions you received were about how you were with the man you loved just for his money. After a while though, you got tired of it and started to answer things like : 

-Oh yeah. In fact, I tried every single billionaires in Gotham and in New Jersey in general, just to see who was the best, and well, I guess Bruce won. 

-What do you mean “tried” ? 

-Well, you know...Tried. How expensive the gifts they gave me were, how many times were we going on date nights, if they were really taking me to the best restaurants...Oh, and if they were decent in bed ! If they knew, for example, what the clitoris was you know ? Important things really. 

The look on the journalist’s face when you said that, and the panicky movements she made, the gestures to make the cameraman understand that he should film elsewhere. 

As soon as you said that though, you regretted it. Yeah sure most people would understand that you were being sarcastic and all, but there was definitely gonna be a percentages of people that were going to believe your words to be true. 

You didn’t care much, but you did care about Bruce’s reputation, and you were a bit mad at yourself that you probably just embarrassed him there...Oh he was totally going to realize that you were too immature for him and leave you. Damn you and your big mouth...Especially since those little outburst of annoyance were a recurrence with you...

************

You had nothing to worry about though. When you joined Bruce, a bit worried what he was going to say, he just smiled widely and said :

-Well I’m glad you set your eyes on me after...”trying” that many people. 

He winked, and wasn’t able to stop himself from laughing, because it was the first time he saw someone making a gotham’s journalist uncomfortable...usually, it was them who found the perfect words to make someone feel clumsy and embarrassed with their words ! 

With a loving kiss to your forehead he said : 

-You’re the best. 

And all worries about ever being an embarrassment for him were gone. You always cracked him up when you were being a sarcastic little shit, and more than once tv cameras got him bursting out in a genuine laughter after you talked back to a journalist that was asking you a too personal, or stupid question. There were even compilations on YouTube of you saying one of your famous punchline, and him just starting to laugh like crazy (you suspected Billy and Tim to make those video compilations). Oh, and memes too...

***********

Yes. Destiny. It was real, it couldn’t be otherwise. Almost four years after the League discovered you and your son, it was Destiny that brought you here, with Bruce, on a beautiful starry summer night, as he was taking you for a discreet date out. You believed in Fate more than ever. 

A hot dog at your favorite food truck in Gotham, wearing only casual clothes so no one would recognize you (and no one did, for most people, it was impossible that Bruce Wayne would go out in a plain t-shirt, cargo shorts and sneakers), a walk on the docks, which was your favorite place ever...And a knee on the floor. 

-Br...Bruce what are you doing ? 

-Hum. I...isn’t this how you’re suppose to do it ? I’m not sure I never done it before...and I don’t want to do it again after. 

You’re silent, as he takes a little box out of his cargo short’s pocket, take his cap off, and opens it in front of you...A ring. Not an extra fancy one. A white gold band with just a little diamond on it. Oh that man. He knew how expensive things always made you a bit awkward and uneasy. 

Not to say that this ring wasn’t expensive, but it was...Simple. 

Your heart stopped as he said : 

-(Y/N) (Y/L/N)...Will you marry me ? 

There was a few agonizing minutes of silence that almost drove Bruce crazy until you said, in a very weak voice, barely a whisper : 

-...Yes. Of course, of course I will. 

People around applause, unaware that they just witnessed the marriage proposal of the most famous persons in Gotham ! 

Bruce got on his feet and took you in his arms, crushing you on his strong chest, and all you could do is laugh stupidly. Laugh because you were so happy. You were about to say something, and to kiss him when : 

-YES YES YEEEEEEES !! Hey Dam...Robin, now we’re really brothers. 

You and Bruce turned around and glared at your son, fortunately, no one noticed the grown ass man and the kid, standing on a boat down the docks. No one noticed Shazam and Robin, just standing there, and cheering you up. Or rather, Billy was cheering, his arms slung around Damian, and Dams’ stayed stern and stoic. As usual. 

For a few seconds, you got scared that the one you came to call your son wasn’t happy that you’d marry his dad, but when he said : 

-Tt. Don’t be a fool Shazam...We already were brothers. 

It kinda melted both you and Bruce’s heart. And you could have sworn you saw tears in your boy’s eyes at his brother’s words. When Billy, still in his adult form, took Damian in his arms, you couldn’t help the little laugh escaping your lips as your little Dami’ was trying to not suffocate at the force of his brother’s hug.

************

And here you were, the day of your wedding, about to get hitch with the love of your life. 

It was a small and cute reception, only close friends and family. 

Alfred cried. Clark cried. Arthur and Hal cried. Barry cried. And Diana rolled her eyes at their over-sensitivness, though she had to admit, seeing the Bat and you getting married was very emotional. 

The amazon too, strongly believed in Destiny, and ever since she first saw you and Bruce interact, she just knew you were made for each other. 

She even asked her “half-sister” Aphrodite once, and when the goddess told her : “Oh I haven’t seen a love so pure and true since...Since ever, really”, she knew she was right. 

Your wedding was perfect. Your sons got really excited. 

Dick, Jason, Tim and Damian were the happiest boys ever, that Bruce found you, and that you always accepted them as your sons (ever since the beginning). Those last four years had been the happiest since a long time they had, and they really felt like they had a family. They were already all calling you “mom”, but this wedding...it made it all official. That morning, you had signed their adoption papers, and they now really were your kids. 

Billy too, was overly happy. Because now, he had the best mother ever...But also the most awesome father, and four amazing brothers ! Just like you accepted Bruce’s children as your own, Bruce had been nothing but great to Billy, and never did a difference between the five boys. They were his, and that was that. Billy sobbed like a baby in his dad’s arms when Bruce signed the official adoption papers...

Yes. That wedding was perfect. 

************

It was Billy’s seventeenth birthday, and you ended up having the best gift ever for him. You were just waiting for the best time to say it. 

Seventeen. You couldn’t believe that your baby boy was turning seventeen already. Damian had turned eighteen that year, and oh let’s not talk about Tim being already nineteen, almost twenty, Dick twenty four (the age you were when you and Bruce got together !) and Jason twenty two. It was too depressing for you to even thing about your kids growing up that fast.  

It was rare to be able to get all the family in one place. Five busy kids, your two oldest not living in the family nest anymore (you cried, when they moved into their own apartment, but their hugs and soothing words to you, the way they made sure you knew how much they loved you and how you’ll always be their mom, it made you feel better...just a bit). Tim still lived at Wayne Manor, and would until he was done with College...he was trying his hardest not to go crazy as his younger brothers made it a mission to annoy him. Oh but he loved those little buggers (that were not so little anymore), and would forgive them anything. Or rather, almost anything. 

As Alfred brings the cake in, and Billy jumps excitedly on his chair, you can’t help but smile, and snuggle against Bruce who was sitting next to you. 

He throws an arm around your shoulder, an brings you closer, smiling at his son as Billy blows on his candles. 

Damian spends the next few minutes trying to get his brother to say what his wish was, but no, Billy won’t say it because it means it won’t happen if he does ! But as each year, he ends up saying it anyway, and gets mad at himself because : “this is why none of my wishes ever happen !”. And this time, Damian seems to regret making him say it, because it was also something he wanted : 

-A little sister. 

The words made you stiffen in your husband’s arms, and at his worried look...yeah ok you had to say it : 

-Hum...Well...I don’t know about a little sister but...hum...I wanted to wait until after you opened your gifts but I guess now...Hum...

They all understand of course, but they want you to confirm it with your words. Well, scratch that, it seems like they all understand, but your husband. He pulled away from you slightly and looks at you, a mix of curiosity and hope in his eyes. 

You talked about having children of your own, though you never really tried because...Well, five teenage boys was a lot of work. And now...What were you saying ? 

Not looking at any of them, and especially not at Bruce, you blurted out : 

-I’m pregnant ! I’ve known since last week but thought that waiting for all of us to be here was best. I still don’t know what the gender is though and...

Your husband’s lips crashing on yours shut you up. 

Alfred lets out a high pitched scream and goes to literally tear away Bruce from you, and takes you in his arms. You respond to the hug, and the tears your adopted father let slides on your shoulder melt your heart. 

Dick jumps on his feet and is already blabbering about how he’ll teach him or her everything about gymnastic and how to be flawless and good looking at all time (oh that boy). Jason, after rolling his eyes at Dick, comes to hug you too (after Alfred finally lets go of you), and whispers a heartfelt “congratulations” in your hear. You hug him back, squeezing your now grown ass man of a son against your heart. 

Damian and Billy are...dancing a gig ? Billy because he won’t be the baby anymore (oh but he’ll always stay the baby, they all will), and Damian because...oh he was just so excited. The more the merrier. 

The only one that seemed a bit reluctant was Tim. And when you looked at him with a questioning look in his eyes, he simply says : 

-...I hope to god it’s a sister, I can’t deal with more boys right now. 

And the laugh that takes you over quickly spreads to your entire family. And of course, quickly after that, Tim reassures you, he’s also excited to have a new sibling. 

That night, you fall asleep in your Bruce’s arms, with his hand splayed protectively over your stomach. 

************

Your boys took a bet about the gender of the baby. Most bet on a boy, because...Well, they all wanted a sister, so of course they’d get a boy ! Bruce was sure it was a girl, so was Billy. 

Turned out, their guts were right, and when you told all of them that they were going to have a little sis’, the burst of joy that took over them was the best thing you ever saw. 

You felt a tint of jealousy for the little girl growing inside you...she was going to have the best brothers in the world, and an amazing father (who was already freaking out about so many things...Him and Alfred child proofed the entire mansion, and it was the most hilarious thing to see EVER). You grew up without a family and oh, you were just so glad that this little one you already loved to death was going to be lucky and have all the love you never had as a kid. 

************

Of course, there was NO WAY that, now that you were pregnant, your husband, your sons and even Alfred (especially Alfred) would let you go out on patrol, or on any missions. 

It was alright for you, you didn’t want to put your child in any danger...But as you approached the term and was full on pregnant, danger came to you. 

You were so tired lately, the baby was due for only a week after and oh this third trimester was hard on you. 

Your hormones had been playing tricks on you...Hell, this morning you cried because Billy asked you if you needed anything, and when Dick came by from Bludhaven to check on you, you bursted into tears in his arms, unable to stop. Your oldest son just held you in his arms and waited patiently for you to calm down and...the fact that he was so understanding made you cry again ! 

It wasn’t helping that Bruce, against his will, had so much work as Batman. Major world threat were acting up lately, and the League was busiest than ever...You wished you could fight by their side, make sure your family and friends were safe and all...

Yes, you just couldn’t wait for your daughter to come. 

Alfred was baking you your favorite cookies and making some tea when it happened. 

You were half-asleep on the couch, when you felt...Something was wrong. You didn’t had time to react, you didn’t had time to use your powers, you were too weak...The last thing you remember are masked men knocking you out. 

************

But of course. You were the famous (Y/N) Wayne. You were pregnant with Bruce Wayne’s child. Of course it was a great idea to kidnap you. 

How those guys went pass Wayne Manor’s security system was a mystery...that they explained to you. By hacking. They hacked into the system and annihilated it. Or rather, showed the cameras and such that everything was good. So they were smart...Because Tim was the one that set this security system up. 

Oh. Smart criminals. They were the worst. 

************

Alfred was frantic, and felt so so guilty. But Bruce reassured him, and didn’t allow himself to panic. He needed to keep his cool if he wanted to find you in one piece. 

He stayed cold and detached, as he was trying to get any clues. Oh those guys weren't amateurs, they planned all that, because the clues were few...but there. 

************

You started to feel the first contraction about an hour after the kidnapping. Your kidnappers were...strangely civil and nice. They didn’t tie you up or anything, they just wanted money. Though they did knock you out, one of them apologized as he gave you a pack of ice. 

And when your water broke, they slightly panicked. 

They didn't get any time to fully enter : “panic mode” though, as your husband and sons charged in. 

You almost felt bad for them and the severe beating they got. Almost, because you could feel your daughter wanting to come out and...Oh my god of course, she was a Wayne, she heard the fight and was resolute to come RIGHT NOW. 

When Bruce got to you, he freaked out. The baby was coming. And the nearest hospital was too far...

But that was not counting on Billy. He told them to join him afterward, and left flying, speeding through the sky.

************

Of course, all the media knew that (Y/N) Wayne arrived in Shazam’s arms to the hospital to give birth to a long awaited daughter in the hour you arrived. 

But also, Bruce made sure none of them could actually access the hospital. An army of private security was shielding the clinic’s doors, letting go only people who needed doctors in. 

A few journalists tried to sneak in, but the entire floor where you were had been privatized. Of course. Bruce did NOT want pictures of you and his daughter in the news the next day. The only pictures the media will get, was the one he would give them and that is it (because of course, a public figure such as Bruce Wayne kinda had to give said pictures...). 

Billy went to a closet when he got you there and was sure doctors were taking of you, and after a “SHAZAM !” he went back to his seventeen year old self, and waited patiently (but also very worried) for the rest of the family to arrive. 

************

When Bruce held her for the first time, he hadn’t been able to hold his tears. 

She was so tiny and perfect. 

She was so beautiful and precious. 

His little girl. His daughter. She wasn’t even three hours yet, and Bruce just knew he would give her the World if he had to. 

They all held her. A bit clumsy and afraid to hurt her. But whenever she was placed in their arms...Their eyes were shining with so much love that, yes, you knew your little girl would always be loved and protected.

Billy cried...Well, they all cried. Even Damian. 

A little sister. They had a little sister. 

You fell asleep that night, your daughter in a deep slumber in her cribs, your husband wrapped around you, and your sons asleep all around the hospital bedroom. Because you were the famous Waynes, your family was allowed to stay the night, and you needed them there, this was perfect. 

(Your daughter’s name) didn’t cry that morning, but she was already awake, making small sounds that woke your husband up. He unwrapped himself from you, and you were so tired that you didn’t even move. 

He looked around, Damian though he was now an huge eighteen year old, was slumped over Dick, Tim and Jason. They were all sitting on uncomfortable hospital chairs, asleep, their head on each others. Damian was laying across their laps, his legs, too long, falling at the end of the chairs in a mess. Billy, though he was also a rather large and tall teenager, was sleeping on his brother’s back, and Bruce couldn’t help but smile at the way all his sons seemed to always have to sleep close from each other in time of crisis and worries. 

But the crisis was avoided. The worries were gone. You were safe, and so was the baby...Well, Bruce was kidding himself if he thought that the worries were over. It was only starting, with his little girl about to start to grow up ! 

He walked to the crib and, there she was, eyes wide open, a tiny little bundle of curiosity...Already so curious, though she couldn’t really see anything. 

She reacted to his voice, and seemed to have decided already that her father’s voice would always be the thing that would soothe her the most. 

He took her in his arms, delicately, lovingly, tenderly, and with a small kiss on her forehead, he swore to her that he would always be there for her, that he would always be there...

-I love you so much already, my little one. I love you more than life itself. You’ll see, your brothers will too. They already are. And your mom...oh you lucky one, you have the most amazing mom ever, and I know she also already loves you so much...(Your daughter’s name), my child, my tiny baby girl, you are so loved, and though right now you’re too young to realize it, you’ll see one day. Welcome to the Wayne family, we’re not always the best, except for your mother and Alfred, but we’ll love you forever. 

Fin ?

__________________________

Are you disappointed ? You are disappointed aren’t you ? Oh my writing second parts to things always stress me out, cause what if it’s not good ? It’s probably not that great, I tried. ANYWAY. 

[bluesfanfiction]

The Prince’s Diaries - USUK FF - Part One

Happy August birthday @gallifreyanlibertea! I know your birthday is not in August but let’s pretend it is ahahaha -cries- I’m so sorry this is so late and it’s not even finished I promise more parts will come but for now I wanted to present you with part one at least I hope you like it (u totally guessed it though i was too careless on snapchat)

Pairing: USUK Summary: guess who fucking did this lameass crossover of the princess diaries 2 movie. this is based off the movie not the books, most of the plot is similar with just a few changes to things like dialogue and stuff

Part One:

It’d been some time since Arthur had made his decision to take over the throne from his grandmother. The time when she would step down was coming soon, and then Arthur would accept the crown and take place as Queen of Spadian. He sighed once again, something he had been doing rather increasingly since arriving in the country. It was something his attendants had noticed very much as well and, in response, would cast him worrying or concerning glances. His grandmother only scolding him for taking up such an attitude in public. Arthur couldn’t help it he supposed. Despite his royalty, he hadn’t been raised as one until very recently. And living with his brothers hadn’t helped his personality very much either. He was rather crude and had too much of a fighting spirit for his grandmother’s liking. She hadn’t seen it as very proper for an omega, especially a royal omega. It had taken a lot of work from her and many others to get Arthur to present as a prince and as a future Queen to Spadian.

For the country, the gender had little to do with the titles. Arthur had been confused at first, but had learned from his lessons that all omegas who took to the throne were deemed Queen, all alphas King, and betas would be decided upon their gender. He had felt it was a rather old and outdated tradition, but it wasn’t like he had any say in it, or any power to change things. It made him shiver to think of the power and responsibility he soon would hold. It was a serious weight that pressed down on his shoulders and made him slouch too much and made his grandmother chide him too often.

“We’re here,” Berwald said from the front of the car. Arthur looked through tinted windows, the press gathered around, a guard stepping up to open the door to his car.

“Do I have to go in?” he mused, more to himself.

Berwald chuckled from the front. “Unfortunately so. It would not be a birthday party without you, would it?”

“We must tell them they’ve gotten the date wrong,” Arthur responded.

“I think you’ll find it to be less excruciating than you’re making it out to be, Prince Arthur,” he said.

“True, but princes must be ones for drama, right?” he joked a bit. Arthur smiled at Berwald as the door opened and thanked him. He wished he didn’t have to arrive to events in such a showy manner though, but this was his 21st birthday party after all. It would be rude of him in the public’s eyes to avoid them. Arthur shifted and managed to get himself out of the car without falling flat on his face. A queen never slides, his grandmother’s words rang out in his ears. Camera flashes and chatter reached Arthur. Berwald knew his dislike for this part and was quickly at his side, helping to escort Arthur inside to where the rest of the guests were.

His suit was elegant and Arthur didn’t even want to know how much money it costed. If he did he’d probably leave to take it off right away or sell it. Before, they had tried to offer him a suit the color of Santa’s clothes and Arthur had immediately turned it down. Now he and the rest of the guests could see him in his dark blue suit, aligned with a silver pattern along the collar, as he was announced to the party, his arrival made blatantly apparent. He wished he could say all the royal parties he’d attended beforehand would have made him less nervous and more used to them, but no matter how many he went to, he always got those butterflies in his stomach. It brought back memories of his first party- setting a man’s sleeve on fire, eating frozen ice cream and causing a scene, and accidentally launching food across the table. An embarrassment he would unfortunately never forget. At least, somehow, these people had still accepted him as their heir. Although he wasn’t exactly sure how much of a choice or say they really had in the matter.

Here was here now, though, descending the staircase, aware of how many eyes were on him and how many people he would have to stop to greet and make small talk with. He wasn’t paying attention as much as he should have been and mostly blamed the nerves, but found himself accidentally stepping on someone’s foot, and quite harshly too. He heard a grunt of pain and reached out to them. “I’m so sorry,” he fretted. “Is your foot all right?” he asked as he and the stranger both looked up, their eyes meeting.

“Oh that’s quite all right, your Highness…The fault was entirely my own...”

“Are you sure your foot will be all right?” Arthur asked again, the man’s polite smile charming. Arthur felt flustered. This was just another embarrassment he could add to the forever growing pile of things he wished he hadn’t done.

“I’m sure- I barely felt a thing.”

Arthur smirked a bit. “Are you holding back those tears in your eyes then because of seasonal allergies or something else, hm?”

The man laughed but the two of them were swept away from each other before they could further their conversation.

After that of course it was time for the many rounds of dancing. The dances flew by in quite a rush, Arthur being tossed about by one man like he was pizza dough, to craning his neck and back just to help guide along a child. Could nobody in this country dance decently? True, he shouldn’t be one to speak, his dancing wasn’t anything to boast about either. Still, he felt rather tired with his current partner twirling him so much he was beginning to become dizzy. He couldn’t help but think of the man he’d met earlier, wondering if he was still at the party, or if he’d already found a partner to dance with for the night. Fortunately, the world stopped turning as another person cut in to take their place as Arthur’s dancing partner.

After Arthur’s eyes stopped spinning around he looked up, finding himself in the arms of the man from before, beautiful as ever. He hadn’t noticed it earlier but now he could see in that polite smile of his a dimple on the right side, somehow making him even more charming than before. Arthur could now notice him more clearly. He could detect alpha on the man’s scent as well as other comforting and warm scents that had Arthur fighting to keep his own interest at bay. He was always a sucker for the good looks, he knew this to be true from his stupid high school crush on an alpha that only used him for the fame, and knew he had to take into account personality over appearance for the future.

“May I?” the man asked.

“Haven’t you already?” Arthur replied, the two of them beginning to dance together anyway. Arthur found his face growing hot, not necessarily because of the proximity between them, but more so at the loss of what to say. He felt his tongue was tied up. “I’m sorry for earlier…” he said, the only thing he could think of to talk about.

“And earlier I said it was really all right,” the other chuckled. “I’m Alfred, by the way.” Arthur was happy to have his name although now aware he had yet to ask for it before then.

“I’m-”

“I believe everyone here knows who you are.”

Arthur frowned a bit. “I’d rather it not be that way.”

“Not one for the crowd huh?”

Arthur shook his head. “And you?”

“I don’t mind it, I suppose. I’ve been to a lot of these events and I don’t think you have much to worry about Your Highness.”

“Please call me Arthur.”

Alfred smiled. “Arthur it is then.”

“What do you mean I don’t have much to worry about? At least you haven’t gone around and broken someone’s foot yet,” Arthur said, although feeling like he was complaining too much now.

“Is my foot broken now?” Alfred asked, laughing and drawing the attention of those around them. “No what I meant was that a few years ago Duke Beilschmidt had a bit too much and by a bit I mean way too much to drink and caused a scene that everyone will never forget. So, if you don’t do worse than that…”

“It sounds like you’re daring me or at least jinxing me now.”

“If you keep dancing with me not much worse can happen right?”

Arthur flushed, pleased with the idea that Alfred had brought up the idea of continuing to dance only with him for the rest of the evening. Even if his legs grew tired he thought he wouldn’t mind it at all. He didn’t like how easily charming Alfred was and how easily taken he was. His upbringing from his brothers had always made him one to not trust alphas easily and to challenge them, to show that despite being an omega, he was just as good. But now, Alfred wasn’t trying to be an alpha, he wasn’t trying to boast or prove himself to Arthur. It was… nice.

“I could send your other foot to the hospital you know,” he prompted, wondering if Alfred would find it funny.

The smile he got told him it had been. “Would you come visit with flowers?” he asked.

“Of course. You like Rafflesias, don’t you?”

“Hey now,” Alfred said. “At least the smell would overpower the smell of my feet.”

Arthur found himself bursting out in laughter at that. “Is that something you feel you should admit aloud?” he asked, the two of them laughing at Alfred’s comment now. Arthur felt a hand on his shoulder, Alfred going a bit stiff, the two of them stopping as a woman stepped in, asking for Arthur’s hand to dance.

Alfred stepped away, allowing the woman and Arthur to dance. Arthur wasn’t able to say anything more to Alfred as he slipped away into the crowd. He felt a sense of disappointment that he didn’t let show, not wanting to offend the woman. He had wanted to speak with Alfred longer. Besides a few others, there weren’t very many people around that were close to his age. He didn’t know Alfred’s age but he had looked, acted, and seemed young enough to be close to Arthur. He wondered if he would get to see him again at the party that night, but unfortunately he wasn’t given that chance.

Back at the palace a week later Arthur was waiting for his grandmother, who was currently in session with parliament. He found himself antsy and still unable to settle down or forget Alfred. He didn’t want to ask around, not wanting to pry into Alfred’s personal life. And also he didn’t want anyone else to know why he was so curious about Alfred. He felt embarrassed to admit the attraction he’d felt at such a short meeting. Now, he was tired of being cooped up in his room any longer when he wasn’t in more lessons, and he didn’t feel like going out to the gardens even though he quite loved them so instead, he decided to explore inside the palace today.

After some walking and time he found himself in an area that appeared to be a historic part of the castle but also one not many people seemed to go to. He found books and old figure heads. He reached up to dust one off, wondering who it was, but his touch caused a switch to go off which opened a wall to his left. Arthur gasped. He should have expected a castle would have secret rooms but he didn’t think he would find one so easily and so quickly. He wondered if anyone else had been to this area before, although it didn’t appear they had for a long time. He went down the secret passageway, the stone walls dusty and old. He rounded the corners until he found a small vent in the wall that he could peer through. Voices reached his ears and as he looked longer he realized he could see and hear into the current parliament session. He could see his grandmother talking although she looked rather unhappy.

A member of the parliament spoke up. “There is another eligible to assume the throne. My nephew should take place as the rightful King of Spadian,” the man said. “We all know that under Spadian law, it states that an omega must be married before they can take the throne. This has always been the law.” Arthur’s gasp this time was louder and he immediately clapped a hand over his mouth, backing away from the vent a bit, hoping no one would think to look or check there. He seemed to be unnoticed.

“This law is old. My grandson, even as an omega, should be given the same rights as any alphas.”

A debate ensued over the laws between members of parliament and the Queen. Arthur’s grandmother stood up for him and Arthur found a sense of anger at parliament for thinking he needed to marry to be “eligible” for the throne. Ruling a kingdom was not about marriage, it was about devotion and responsibility and- and who was this nephew anyway? Who was trying to take away Arthur’s eligibility to the throne? Why was he more deserving than Arthur just because he was an alpha? Did they really find Arthur so unfit to rule?

The decision was made though. “In order for Arthur to assume the throne as Queen, he must be married within 30 days or he forfeits the throne to the Viscount’s nephew, Lord Jones.” Arthur stormed away from the vent, angry tears in his eyes at their old traditional laws that were always setting omegas back. Of course, sometime later, his grandmother came to deliver him the news he had already heard. She seemed to know though somehow that he’d been peeking in on the session and most likely she also know about the secret passageway and vent.

“It’s not fair grandmother, can’t you talk to them again?”

“Their decision is final, Arthur… I’m sorry.”

Arthur hugged a pillow to his chest, feeling miserable. He and his grandmother knew that 30 days was not long enough- not long enough to fall in love anyway. He wanted to scream into it and toss the rest of the pillows all around the room. He wanted to run away from the castle and back home to his family and cry. He wanted to do so much that he couldn’t do- but… If he wanted to become Spadian’s Queen, he would have to stay and get married. The decision caused conflict within him, tearing him between his duty to his country and between the desire he’d always had to find the perfect alpha for him that he would fall in love with and marry…

“It will have to be an arranged marriage, won’t it?” he murmured into the pillow. His grandmother hadn’t said anything but she looked at him now and nodded. Arthur sighed. He didn’t want to talk about this or think about this now… He got up, kissing his grandmother on the cheek, and headed out of the room.

About a few days or so later, when Arthur had more time to really process what had been decided and what he had to do, there was a meeting set up between him, the Queen, and the Viscount’s nephew, Lord Jones. Arthur wanted to, and didn’t want to meet the alpha responsible for trying to steal the throne from him. Who was he to come in now at such a last moment and take this from him? All Arthur could picture Lord Jones as was this old and balding man who wanted to take the throne just for the royalty and power. Arthur’s grandmother had been such a wonderful Queen and Arthur wanted to protect the Spadian royal line. He didn’t want to hand it over to someone who would easily abuse it or bring the country misfortune because of carelessness.

“Why is he staying here?” Arthur complained, following his grandmother through the palace. Lord Jones was set to arrive at any minute and despite Arthur’s desires to punch the man into the ground he had to stay polite and hospitable. “Is he just inviting himself to check out his ‘future home’?”

“I invited him,” she said, and Arthur gaped at her.

“But why?”

“Because if there’s any mischief going on, I want it to be aware of it. Having Lord Jones closer to our side is for the better. Now straighten up,” she said, patting on Arthur’s slouched back. Arthur huffed and did as she said reluctantly.

A guard came in to announce Lord Jones’s arrival. Arthur’s eyes waited on the door, trying to burn a hole into it and hopefully catch Lord Jones on fire as well. An older, short and fat man stepped into the room. Arthur felt a lump in his throat, anger boiling in him. “The Viscount,” the guard announced, as the older man stepped aside for another person to come into the room, “and his nephew, Lord Jones.”

Arthur’s chin nearly dropped to the floor. Had he known the whole time? Even back at the party? Had he been planning for this moment, to announce himself and his intentions like this? Arthur’s piercing gaze fell on Alfred and he wanted to do nothing more than march up to him and chew him out. He knew that kind of behavior would not help him in assuming the throne, and would definitely leave a bad impression on him and his grandmother, so he refrained.

The Queen stepped up to greet the Viscount and Lord Jones. Alfred. Arthur wanted to spit at him. Their eyes met but Alfred’s held no emotions. Arthur felt played by him. He felt he’d been an absolute fool for thinking such nice things about Alfred, and cursed him for being so charming. He supposed he would never learn, always falling for men who had good looks but twisted personalities.

“Lovely to meet you, I’m Alfred Jones, Your Majesty” Alfred said, bringing the Queen’s hand up for a kiss and bowing. Alfred then came over to Arthur, reaching to take his hand and bring it for a kiss. “And a pleasure to meet you too, Your Highness.”

Arthur couldn’t react for a moment, wanting to yank his hand away from Alfred. “The pleasure is mine as well, Lord Jones” he finally said, keeping his voice steady. He smiled at Alfred politely before raising his foot up and bringing it down right onto Alfred’s foot, the one he’d stepped on before. He heard the Queen and the Viscount gasp, Alfred’s face scrunching up in pain, a sound coming from his lips. Arthur hmphed at him, turned, and marched out of the room.

End of Part One

[hetalia-has-a-secretary]

Can you write a human au of the stray trio, where a super shy s/o tries to confess but starts crying since they are so nervous? I think it could end up being super fluffy in the end.

Awwwwwww! Poor shy buddy~ QwQ you will get the fluffiest of fluffs!

Stray Trio: Shy S/O cries when confessing!

America:

His S/O was shaking. Their body felt warm, and heavy. Even still, they were hellbent on telling him their feelings. Walking over to him at a quick pace got his attention Pretty easily, making their heart beat faster than thought possible. He looked at him with concern in his eyes, already giving them his undivided attention.

"Hey S/O! What's with the racecar speed walk? You need a hero?"

His hero remark made them inwardly smirk, but it didn't stop the lump in their throat forming as soon as they went to speak. Moments went by, and he started to get more worried for them.

"Are you okay? Seriously starting to freak me out a bit here..."

That was it. The tears started to slip and they could only blurt out-

"DATE ME!"

Quickly covering their mouth they started to silently cry. That was not at all what they wanted to say, and the shocked look on Alfred's face didn't help. Especially when that shocked look turned into a frown. All S/O could do was look down, and try to bite back the flow of tears.

Warm, strong arms wrapped around them as they sobbed into his shoulder. Soft apologies mumbled against his plaid fabric. The only thing that calmed them down was the loud laugh coming from their source of affection.

"Why are you apologizing? I'm supposed to be the one to admit their feelings first! Then again... That was kind of hot- ha!"

S/O very quickly went from sobs, to beat red and flustered.

England:

It was a rare occurrence to see Arthur out of his element. He'd usually spend time at the library but today his S/O caught him at the craft store. Originally S/O themselves needed some small miniature figures for a school project, but hanging out with him sounded more fun. He jumped as soon as they touched his shoulder.

"O-Oh! S/O! What a pleasant surprise to see you here, I'm just uh..."

It was very obvious what he was doing considering he was standing right in front of the embroidery section. His S/O had spotted a heart shaped design and they were immediately reminded of their feelings towards him. Completely unaware of the scrunched up face Arthur was taking as a disgusted one. Quick to correct him when he asked them about it, they decided to be more honest. Then came the jitters.

Arthur had zero ideas on what to do with the tears that had started falling from their face.

"Darling, Why are you crying-"

He immediately covered his mouth, never really using endearments like that before. His S/O whipped their head back up at him, a soft smile pasted on their lips.

"D-darling? Does that mean you like me too?"

"Was that what all the crying was about? Oh, love... Come here-"

Being immediately held by the British gentleman, catching his soft cologne, calmed them down immediately. He eventually admitted to wanting to make them an embroidered confession. But this was just as good.

Japan:

They were just two shy beans in a pod, and his S/O knew it. So they felt like they needed to make a move if any were to be made. Did not make it easier however.

They had taken a lunch break together, and S/O had promised to make them a bento box, saying it would be like having a slice of his home. He was pretty excited about it actually. He hadn't stopped talking about all the different ways to prepare bento, meanwhile his S/O was growing more and more nervous over their confession. When Kiku finally realized their discomfort he took it as him being annoying.

"I am sorry. I did not mean to keep talking."

"No! It's not that I just- uhm..."

There was silence between the two, and the longer it lasted the more emotional S/O was getting. Japan had shyly, whilst shaking, placed a light hand on their shoulder.

"It is okay. Whatever it is, I am here for you..."

"Can.... We.... Date?"

His hand immediately withdrew and his face turned red. But nothing stopped the happy smile he wore. In the end he gave a fast couple of boss, now officially lost for words at his crush liking him back.

Later on that day his S/O was surprised to hear others talk about it. Apperantly he was so ecstatic about it, he told his close friends immediately, and it spiraled out from there. Not that they minded!

[ask-the-magic-nations]

Wow I really like Franny & Artie in Ravenclaw!!

Thanks!!

((Warning: I got carried away. Like... really carried away. Basically explaining how they came to start dating in this AU. Sort of like a fic, but not really.))

Arthur really didn’t want to follow in his family’s footsteps and be a Slytherin, but he also didn’t want to be with any of his older brothers, so Ravenclaw was the only option. Plus, y’know, the studious and smart house seems like it will have pretty sane and tolerable students?

So he’s really pretty pleased underneath all his embarrassment when he hurries to the table, and he sits in the first empty place he sees, which happens to be next to Francis. And Francis doesn’t really know anything about Arthur, and he is trying to be nice, honest, and he says something along the lines of: “You must be Fingal and Tadgh’s little brother!” 

(He forgets about Dafydd. Everyone forgets about Dafydd.)

And this really annoys Arthur because literally the very reason he came to Ravenclaw was to get away from his brothers, so he says something pretty snappy and rude. And Francis is just sitting there shocked like. How dare this little firstie talk back to ME, a second year???

So Arthur kind of forgets about it (and Francis) over the next few days, partly because he and his family are always just rude to each other and he thinks nothing of it, and partly because he’s busy fending off Fingal and Tadgh, along with getting to know his subjects and the other first years (plus he and Francis are in different years, so they don’t share any classes). Then one day he’s in the common room, maybe a week after he arrives, and he says something to Francis (maybe asks him to pass him something), and Francis is like, ahaha!! Revenge time!! 

Like he doesn’t do anything bad he just gets all high and mighty and says something mildly rude back, in return for Arthur’s rudeness. They probably would have had a proper argument because if there’s one thing Arthur can do, it’s argue, but Gilbert arrives and Francis is busy.

But Francis gets to feeling kinda bad? He thinks how afraid Arthur must be, being a newbie, and he decides that since he’s the grown up one, at the mighty age of twelve, that he’ll make sure he didn’t actually upset Arthur. So he goes back to Arthur and gets ready to apologise, but Arthur thinks he’s being sarcastic? So he snubs Francis and Francis decides that’s that, he’s done being nice to the brat, and Arthur is pissed that this second year keeps annoying him, and basically it all goes downhill from there.

But they do get kinds fond of each other - like Arthur does sometimes think Francis is pretty funny when he and the BTT act up, and Francis kind of admires the fact that Arthur will fight with literally anyone including Snape. Plus they dedicate a lot of their time to annoying each other, aka Francis sure he knows Arthur’s habits in order for optimal pranking and Arthur always wanting to know what Francis is doing so that he has something to hold over his head. But they’re both way to stubborn to ever admit it.

Then in fifth year Francis doesn’t come back after summer (he’s sick or something, nothing too major but he doesn’t want to be sick at school), and Arthur’s like. What the fuck. Where is Francis. He badgers Gilbert and Antonio and even ends up writing Francis a very pissy letter. Not because he likes the Damned Frog, you understand. It’s just boring without him to fight with.

And everyone’s like. Huh. Hang on a sec. Something fishy is going on here.

Dafydd figures it out first, because Dafydd does actually keep an eye on his younger brothers and he’s fairly sensible (for a Kirkland), and he’s sat in the Hufflepuff common room one evening and just gives this huge sigh because he knows well that there is no possible way that Francis and Arthur will manage to be rational about all of this.

Yekaterina overhears him and is like, u ok? So Dafydd tells her, because he’s got a bit of a crush on Kat and he doesn’t want to upset her by not telling. Khulan also overhears, and although she doesn’t care she ends up mentioning it to Kiku when they’re talking one evening, and Kiku thinks it’s cute, because he likes Arthur and Francis.

And since Kiku knows, and since he’s under the (generally accurate) impression that Khulan would only know if it was common knowledge, he tells his roommates Mathias and Sadiq. They think it’s funny, and Mathias asks Gilbert why he didn’t tell him, since they’re cousins and all, and Gilbert’s like OOOOOOHHHH. Because this explains not only Arthur’s relentless badgering of him and Antonio, but also all those letters from Francis that all seem to be Very Interested in what Arthur is doing.

And of course Gilbert tells Antonio, who tells Lovino, who tells Feliciano, who of course tells everyone.

Fingal and Tadgh think it’s really really funny, but are also like. Proud, almost? Because the Kirklands do love each other really. Plus, Francis is a muggleborn and if Arthur falls in love with someone who’s both a muggleborn and a guy it’s going to REALLY annoy their grandparents. So they take Arthur aside and give him this painfully earnest How To Date and We Support You talk, and Arthur’s like NOOOOOOO.

(Dafydd and Seamus decide they have enough drama on their plates without all of this nonsense, so they skip out, although Dafydd does give Arthur a sort of awkward pat on the shoulder one morning which is somehow almost as embarrassing as Tadgh and Fingal’s talk.)

Of course nobody says anything to Arthur, because even if it is now widely regarded as fact, everyone’s pretty sure Arthur himself wouldn’t appreciate it being brought up, and nobody says anything to Francis either.

So he gets back to school in October, and everyone’s acting weird? he puts it down to one of those unexplainable Hogwarts phenomena and thinks nothing of it.

Except he seems to keep getting accidentally locked into cupboards with Arthur, or assigned jobs with Arthur, and it’s Really Weird.

Then the Tri Wizard Tournament starts, and obviously it’s way less dramatic and Extra without Harry being there, but Arthur has to deal with the ballad of his friend Vasilica and that Durmstrang student he Totally Hates, along with Lukas ‘what do you mean I like Mathias what are you talking about why did he talk about me?’ Bondevik. So as the Yule ball comes up he’s a bit frazzled, and decides he wont go.

But by now Francis has got wind of things and thinks that Arthur has this massive crush on him (which he does) and that he really wants to go to the Yule Ball together (which he does, but won’t ever admit to). So Francis waits for an invite, which doesn’t come. So he figures Arthur’s just shy, until he overhears Arthur talking with Abel and Erzsébet, and she’s insisting they should both go because it’s the biggest and best party they’ll see at the school.

Arthur and Abel don’t really like parties that much but they see her point. So Arthur turns to Abel and is basically like: “You wanna go together, since neither of us want to go with anybody else?”

(Abel’s aro ace and not all that sociable.)

And Erzsébet’s shocked because she’d thought Francis and Arthur were Meant To Be, so she’s like: “Arthur you’re sure there’s nobody you want to go with?” Like really heavily hinting.

Arthur does want to go with someone (Francis), but since he doesn’t realise just how widespread the knowledge that he’s crushing on Francis is, he doesn’t want to say, so he’s just: “Nope.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yes.”

“You’re ABSOLUTELY POSITIVE???”

“Yes???”

Erzsébet’s aghast because she’s got a lot on her plate trying to convince Ivan and Alfred to go together, and to get Berwald to ask Tino, plus trying to get someone - RODERICH - to ask her, so she really doesn’t have time to try and act as matchmaker for Francis and Arthur too.

And Francis is like. Heartbroken. Like he surprises himself with how upset he is. He’d got to really like the whole idea of him and Arthur.

So he’s moping for days and either stays in his dorm or the Hufflepuff common room and Arthur’s like omg why is Francis so upset? Not that I care for he is My Mortal Enemy. And even Lukas and Vasilica are like, bruh, and try to gently spell it out for him. But they’re not great with relationships either and don’t quite like to just say it.

But in the end disaster is only averted because Fingal and Tadgh are like. Annoyed. And they spend like every evening in the Gryffindor common room trying to come up with ideas, helped by Erzsébet and anyone else who’s interested. Then Seamus happens to come in with Siu Chun and Emil one day so Siu Chun can get a book from their Dorm and as he’s waiting with Emil he hears what his brothers are talking about and he’s like. Omg. no. this is so embarrassing.

All of which he says to Emil and Emil just says, “But I thought they were asking you about it to? They’ve been doing this every evening? I think they invited some of the slytherins over tonight.”

And Seamus is horrified because HE is a Slytherin. This, he decides, has gone on long enough. So when they arrive at their study group he gets Lilli to take him to the Ravenclaw common room, where Arthur is sat with Lukas and Vasilica but it’s otherwise empty and basically demands that Arthur FIX THIS AND STOP EMBARRASSING HIM.

Arthur’s mortified that Seamus knows about this, and Vasilica and Lukas have to carefully tell him that everyone knows this, and Arthur’s literally horrified, especially when he finds up what Fingal and Tadgh have been doing.

But before he can go and kill them, in an uncharacteristic display of social intelligence he finally realises what’s got Francis so upset, so he barges upstairs, slams open the fifth year dorm and basically yells for Francis to go to the ball with him. Unfortunately he’s with the Hufflepuffs right now and Arthur ends up screaming at Gupta, who’d managed to successfully avoid most of this bullshit so far, but he ends up finding Francis with Yekaterina’s help and the long and short of it is he asks Francis out. And of course Francis keeps him hanging for a few days - which gives Arthur a nice amount of time to go and have a blazing row with his older brothers - but eventually says yes the night before.

(Abel’s fine with it. He ends up going with Kiku, since the Tale of Yong Soo and Kiku is even more ridiculous. They have a good time.)

So they go to the ball, and it’s a bit awkward at first, but they end up realising that they do actually like each other, and it basically snowballs from there, although they often annoy each other because old habits die hard.

((I’m sorry, I really didn’t intend for that to be so long! Well done if you managed to read this far though lol))

[notwithoutsincerity]

Southern England: ‘Tis new to thee’

One would think that someone who had both taught Shakespeare and written a dissertation on the Globe playhouse would have made an early visit to England to know what he was talking about. Not I. Instead I waited about 25 years to visit, and not for a professional reason, but for the opportunity to visit Chris, a friend from my undergraduate days, and Adrienne, his wife.

Chris is one of those rare people who have the ability to “speak the truth in love,” as if he can both see something troubling in a person and still see the person. In other words, my blind spots do not create his own blind spots (and this observation refers mostly to our undergraduate days, if, as I hope, the blind spots are diminishing).

(What follows is a map of the places we visited, leading to an in depth description of the places—basically a travelog that could save you a journey to Southern England or, may I humbly suggest, make your journey richer.)

Adrienne carries on domestic duties in a conventional way while Chris is raking in the money teaching English. Both of course could imagine spending their time differently, but the arrangement apparently suits them both. While Adrienne is good at being flexible, she could, if pushed too far, trounce a person...it was something about the way she swims in the English Channel year round without a wet suit or drinks apple cider vinegar, garnished with crushed egg shells, that earned that recognition. She sometimes teaches at the English school, gardens there and at home, and, as she calls her wanderings through nature, "forages" whenever possible. Not wanting to disrupt the obvious balance of their lives, I behaved my best while in Southern England, staying at their home in Bournemouth when we were not driving or biking to various sites, mostly historical or, better, those that combine something ancient with natural beauty.

  English Channel, Bournemouth -  looking toward Purbeck

           Part of Chris’ job is being a tour guide to his students who come from around the world and have an interest in learning England as well as English. A trip to Oxford University, Chris has found, is about as far as a day trip should be, and that was as far north as we strayed. One way (motor vehicle) or another (bicycle), we had five outings, listed approximately from north to south:

  (1) Oxford      (2) Winchester      (3) Downton | Stonehenge | Old Sarum | Salisbury (4)  Wimborne Minster      (5) Isle of Purbeck | Corfe Castle | Wareham

   Oxford

Oxford University, like Hamlet and the Grand Canyon, is so familiar to me through reading and photos that I cannot separate what I saw recently from what I expected to see, and at the same time I admit a truly superficial knowledge of the place and its traditions. It's hard to imagine spending one's time studying in a place like the college of Christ Church: On one hand, the ambience seems perfect for a cloistered scholar, while on the other, the pressure of succeeding, coupled with the long leash allotted between exams, could lead some to sabotage the situation.

Of special interest to me was Magdalen ("Maudlin") College, where C.S. Lewis taught for most of his life: In spite of the beautiful grounds and his noted accomplishments at Magdalen, Lewis wrote to Tolkien, “I am certainly a much, and perhaps an increasingly, hated man"[1]. In the words of a former student of Lewis, "Oxford dons objected to Lewis, not for becoming a Christian, but for advertising the fact. His way of putting intellectual and moral pressure on people in print for the purpose of converting them was an offence against academic etiquette. Unspoken rules of academic decorum required one to be decently secretive about religious convictions."[2] Within a year, no doubt encouraged in part by these conflicting sentiments, Lewis moved to Cambridge. There he taught at Magdalene (with a final "e") College, remarking that his new Magdalene at Cambridge was the redeemed and consecrated Mary Magdalene (unlike Oxford's). It's a nice ending to the story, except similar prejudice met him in Cambridge, but this time he wore his rejection with a difference: he had been unanimously elected as a full professor, something Oxford had failed to do.

While on the topic of Lewis, let me mention our related stop at The Eagle and Child, the Oxford pub renowned for the meetings of the Inklings, where Lewis, Tolkien, Charles Williams, and others spent time reading their manuscripts aloud: Inside the pub, a quote from C.S. Lewis appears at least two times, once in chalk and once in paint: "My happiest hours are spent with three or four old friends in old clothes tramping together and putting up in small pubs . . . ." It surprised me that Lewis', and not Tolkien's, was the name most obviously being capitalized upon. No doubt, the "hated man" quote does not appear in the pub, while if I had poked around, I would have uncovered references to Tolkien, making currency of his name, too. The writers did, at any rate, put the pub on the map permanently and unregrettably. It was quite busy by our mid-afternoon visit, our small party finding a cramped table where, in order to shift seats, we spilled only a part of a beer.

One Oxfordian treasure that Chris led us to was a college, Keble, whose grounds and buildings are gloriously maintained. It is, by English standards, relatively new, being Victorian. In an anteroom of the chapel hangs "The Light of the World"—an allegorical painting by William Holman Hunt. The chapel itself, with a student playing the organ, awoke in me a hint of the attachment that many Christians (and others) feel for such chapels and cathedrals.

The cumulative effect of standing in this chapel that day and several others the next week was that I thought, "Here, I could believe in God." Next, as the thought lingered, I added, "Except I already do believe in God, the God with no boundaries, and I belong to church, the church without walls." Even then, a peaceful, easy feeling accompanied me beneath those high ceilings built who knows how by men that risked their lives for an ideal and enough food to keep their families fed.

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Winchester

To my guide I owe, among many other things, these two facts: (1) to be a city in England, the community must house a cathedral, and (2) "chester" as in "Winchester" refers back to the Roman occupation of England (43-410AD), derived from the word "castrum" for military camp. Accordingly, although Bournemouth has over four times the population of Winchester, it is a town, and Winchester, with its Cathedral, is a city. The military aspect of Winchester presents itself several ways, including through the two medieval gates still standing (Westgate and Kingsgate), as well as a castle and other fortifications.

Most of these buildings originated in the 12th and 13th centuries, many of them having been restored, modified, and expanded up to the present. Below is the outside of the Great Hall: Inside the doorway (where the person is standing) one can enter the Great Hall (except when it is closed, such as when we showed up, our visit coinciding with a memorial service). Peeking in we could still see what is called King Arthur's Round Table, hanging high on the wall like a giant archery target, painted alternately white and green. The table dates to the 13th century, placing it much later than Arthur (5th-6th century) and a little later than the Arthurian Legend (12th century). Its current paintwork dates to the 16th century, which the Wikipedia article considers "late" relative to the table itself. The obvious giveaway for the date of the current paintwork is King Henry VIII's image at the twelve-o'clock position, seated in Arthur's chair.

Winchester Cathedral dates to the 11th century, remains the longest Gothic cathedral in Europe, and holds the remains of Jane Austen. What captured my imagination and respect, however, was the bust and story of William Walker: His fame arose from the fact that, around 1905, it was discovered that the foundation of Winchester Cathedral was degrading quickly. Sitting on several feet of peat, the building was sinking and tipping as the peat was saturated by ground water. From 1906 until 1911, six hours a day, six days a week, Walker put on his clumsy diving suit and descended into the mud, in complete darkness. He would remove boards and peat, replacing the old material with bags of concrete (25,000), concrete blocks (115,000), and bricks (900,000). Once he finished his work, the ground water was safely pumped out and the cathedral sat (and sits) on a solid foundation. One should remember that all this underground work was performed where bodies had been buried for hundreds of years. William relied on a smoke from his pipe every time he emerged in order to disinfect himself. Kudos, William the Conqueror of Faulty Foundations.

The "close," or the immediate area, surrounding Winchester Cathedral contains other historic buildings that come in quick succession. One passes Winchester College, which, according to Adrienne, is, "the oldest continually running school in Britain. It was built during the black death to give an education to poor scholars. Now it's for the very rich - about £60,000.00 per year!" A few yards away lie the ruins for Wolvesey Castle, also known as the "Old Bishop's Palace" (12th century). In Shakespeare's The Tempest Miranda, who has been stranded on the island since infancy, seeing men swimming to shore—the first men she's ever seen beside her father, Prospero—proclaims, "O brave new world," to which Prospero replies, "'Tis new to thee." So I noticed that this England was a new world to me, and that the older the architecture, the braver and newer the place seemed. While the Great Hall sits on the high end of High Street, a statue of Alfred the Great (849-899AD) guards the low end of High Street. Whether it was for defending Britain against the Danes, reviving learning and monastic life, or establishing a code of law, Alfred's fifty years on earth and twenty-eight as King of Wessex justify that title.

Little do I remember of Beowulf, the 11th century poem that might glance back to Alfred's reign, albeit indirectly (since Beowulf defends that Danes against Grendel the monster). One relatively trivial line, however, somehow entered and never left me:    Hylde hine þá heaþodéor --hléorbolster onféng   eorles andwlitan Loosely translated:    The war-bold one [Beowulf] lying down, the pillow received the earl's head. It's memorable because of the active role assigned to the usually passive "pillow"—it receives his head instead of his head touching the pillow. This grammar echoes Christ's, "upon this rock I will build my church; and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it." Again, the usually passive "gates" are the agents of the sentence, instruments of offence, not of defense, as though there's something quite impatient and indiscriminate about hell. Words, as do buildings, transport me to the past, to a world that I couldn't predict, even though it all already happened.

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Downton | Stonehenge | Old Sarum | Salisbury

Having read William Golding's The Spire (1964), a novel about the building of the spire at Salisbury Cathedral, I told Chris that this was one place I wanted to visit (being generally agnostic about our itinerary). On the way there, we stopped in Downton, about an hour's drive from Highclere Castle where the television series was shot. Downton's St. Laurence Church struck me as more of a church and less of a tourist attraction. Perhaps for that reason, the woman—a church worker who arrived just as we did—admonished us to read the writing above the alter, which we then saw as we entered: The writing was elegant, but when I realized we had been directed to read the Ten Commandments, I felt knocked back to my teenage years when I was long-haired and untrustworthy. And I wondered just how irascible I still appeared.

As we arrived in Salisbury and headed toward the cathedral, Chris made a last-minute executive decision half-way through one of the many multi-lane, high-speed, clockwise roundabouts and torpedoed us north toward Stonehenge. He was right to take advantage of the sunny weather (not unusual for my visit). Once we arrived, I was fine with Chris' unconventional yet legal backdoor approach to the ruins. Even if we had paid, we would not have been able to walk right up to the immense stones—although my friend Howard used to climb on them fifty years ago before things got out of hand in that respect.

Just outside Salisbury sits Old Sarum on a hill. Old Sarum was the first Salisbury ("Sarum" being a possible corruption of "Salisbury"). On a hill top, it was protected by large ditches that were dug around it, putting an advancing enemy at serious disadvantage. In the following photograph, the hill on which the castle stood is seen from the ground upon which the old cathedral stood. (Model of how it used to look) In 1226, the cathedral was moved to Salisbury (giving the clergy some freedom from the watchful eye of the castle). Along with the cathedral came the Magna Carta, which remains housed in wonderful condition in the Salisbury Cathedral. Here Salisbury Cathedral can be seen from Old Sarum:

The Magna Carta, a major concession from floundering King John to the nobility, clergy, city of London, Welsh, free peasants, and other entities, marks a portentous power shift when the king could no longer ignore the interests of others.[3] It was annulled by the pope the same year, but as soon as King John died the following year, it was reinstated. When King John's son, Henry III, heir to the throne, came of age, he issued a substantially revised Magna Carta (1225), which became the standard version.

While the Magna Carta alone would merit a visit to the Salisbury Cathedral, so would many other features, including the spire, which was closed to visitors when we arrived, the massive organ pipes, the oldest working clock, and the recent font that is both beautiful and allows full immersion baptism (which is what "baptism" originally meant).

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Wimborne Minster

During my stay, Adrienne had been diligently picking up chestnuts from a nearby grove, cross-ing, cooking, and then shelling them. The day we set out for nearby Wimborne Minster, we stopped by some public space for more supplies. It was replete with wild horses (their hoof prints betraying their presence) and apple trees. Chris climbed trees that defied physics in supporting his body weight, all the while chiding me for letting apples fall to the ground instead of heroically diving for each falling apple as though a small bruise would end the world a day sooner.

Well, we worked through that apple patch and visited Wimborne Minster, the church. It famously contains one of the few remaining chained libraries in the world. As I recall, the librarian said it was one of four. The definition is slippery.[4] As one can see, the chains—employed to prevent theft of what were truly expensive items when handwritten, as well as at the dawn of the printing press—are affixed to the covers of the books, to prevent damage to the spine. As a result the books are shelved backwards, and only an index allows one to find the desired book without pulling them all from the shelves:

The librarian, speaking to some strangers, also allowed us to handle a few books (not on chains):

She was a tolerant librarian:

A recipe for the ink that lasts nearly a millennium (to date):

The church itself was characteristically laden with history, including the tomb of the brother of Alfred the Great, as well as the tombs of John Beaufort, 1st Duke of Somerset, and his duchess, the maternal grandparents of King Henry VII. High above the alter hangs an intricate astronomical clock. This photo of the exterior I like in particular because that gentleman could be my late dissertation director, John Murphy, if I didn't know better:

Kingston Lacy

Afterward we went to Kingston Lacy, an estate that was inhabited by the Bankes family after they, being Royalists in the 17th century, were forced out of Corfe Castle by the Parliamentarians.

The estate included gardens and foxes:

And apple trees that were being trained to grow horizontally...Chris says this is common. I suppose it makes them easier to pick:

We planned to end the outing at Vine Inn, a small pub that Chris knew, although it wasn't in reality as impressive to Adrienne as it was in his rendition. The bigger problem was that it was closed, but the bathrooms were open (yay): So we went instead to the Olive Branch, where I learned that the four pounds a friend had given me for the trip were officially obsolete by the end of the weekend in order to make way for the new twelve-sided, harder-to-counterfeit £1 coin.

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Isle of Purbeck | Corfe Castle | Wareham

And those pounds, my friend, bring us close to the end. The next day I straightway handed them to Chris in order to pay for the "chained ferry" that would take us and our bikes across Poole Harbour, so that, after a brief stop in a phone booth, we could continue on our bikes toward Corfe Castle.

Probably the highlight of the entire visit, this day involved everything an outing should: a peninsula named "Isle of Purbeck," sheep, cows, a beautiful ruined castle and a town made out of its stones (those practical Parliamentarians), the nicest chapel by my rustic standards, coffee, beer, and a final shish kabob before a train ride home—a time not unlike "three or four old friends in old clothes tramping together and putting up in small pubs." Another view of Corfe Castle: And another: Not our train in the distance: We instead rode our bikes to Wareham. Chris caught this fiery light of the setting sun coming through the windows of St. Martin's Church: Eating, we waited for the train:

And that was that. Next morning, I flew home, grateful for one of the best weeks in, as Shakespeare's John of Gaunt says, This royal throne of kings, this scepter'd isle, ... This blessed plot, this earth, this realm, this England, This nurse, this teeming womb of royal kings...

     _____________________________Footnotes_____________________________

[1] "Lewis on Tolkien: 4"

[2] "Against the stream: C. S. Lewis and the Literary Scene," Harry Blamires, 17.

[3] English translation of the Salisbury copy of the Magna Carta, with images.

[4] According to Wikipedia there are five. Moreover, Marsh's Library in Dublin has no chains, but instead has cages for the readers (not unlike the rare book rooms I've visited).