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#like 'broken'
atxxzist · 1 month
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spring in our hearts | c.s (preview)
summary: the spring where you finally fall in love and experience everything that comes with it; the good and the bad
pairing: choi san x f!reader
genre: angst, slice of life, suggestive, romance, fluff?
release date: sometime around next week, idk
and he probably didn’t push too hard because it’s almost like he knew you’re gonna be there; waking up before it’s even 7 and sitting at the same table from before, watching guests go in and out of the room hoping to catch the boy that sent you the text last night.
his face lights up the same as you when he enters, waving in the air and heading your direction, you really shouldn’t feel so nervous but excited at the sight of him walking.
“hey!” he greets cheerfully, sliding into the seat across with a smile.
“good morning,” you return, hands curled in your lap and happy he can’t see them because you wonder what he’d think.
“how you’d sleep?” he ask the same time he combs over his morning hair, never in your life has someone looked so good doing so, you didn’t even think it was possible.
“good,” you manage to answer with composure. “and you?”
“alright.” he shrugs. “wooyoung was just mostly drunk and annoying from last night’s dinner.”
a small giggle also laced with empathy escapes from you. “well i’m sorry to hear. i hope today will be better.”
he nods. “hopefully.” then realizing you haven’t even gotten your food, talking in a concerned tone, “don’t tell me you were waiting for me.”
“i was,” you say. “don’t worry about it. i’m not that hungry. the dinner last night kept me filled plenty.”
“if you say so…” he lingers a bit before continuing, “should we go now?”
“sure.”
you also get close to the same thing you got last time, with the exception that they’ve switched out pancakes for waffles, getting a question from san after sitting down about your food choices.
“well, i really only eat korean foods,” you tell him. “i’m not too fond of anything else besides what’s on my plate right now.”
“ahh. so you’re a picky eater?”
“somewhat. that’s why yeosang hates going out to eat with me.”
san lets out a quiet snicker, something more mischievous bubbling in his eyes that you don’t read into.
“you talk about yeosang a lot… does yours and his relationship ever bothers your other friend?” he asks, the question stopping you from sipping your coffee.
the friendly and harmless tone still in the air but you can’t hide the fact the question flusters you a little.
“well, me and yeosang have known each other for a while… even before grace, so she understands that we don’t see each other like that at all.”
san quirks his lips and nods, taking your words for it.
“why?” you speak again. “do we give out that kind of vibe?” you ask worriedly, because you would never want to unintentionally (or intentionally) hurt grace in any ways. on your life you have never seen yeosang for more than the annoying middle schooler you couldn’t get rid of.
but as san shakes his head, you feel a sense of relief, watching as a light smirk creep up on his face.
“just wondering,” he says, so calmly but eerie at the same time, you can’t quite grasp the intention. but then something else comes over, and you forget all about deciphering san’s answer; not really wanting to but letting the intrusive thoughts win.
“and that girl you were with yesterday? you guys together?” you ask, no menance in your voice; just a natural curioisity because you wanna know… not for any reasons deeper.
“she’s a friend,” he answers fast and casual. “i know her from my previous school because we were under the same program and have similar interests and whatnot.”
“i see,” you mumble, a light smile anyone would’ve missed because you don’t wanna admit to anyone why the fact brings you a sense of comfort.
but it doesn’t cut it with grace.
“that’s what they always say!” she cries dramatically, after storming into your room when she was finally done sleeping past noon and the events of yesterday hit her.
but you don’t have any reasons to doubt san, even if you love your best friend and wanna take her words for it, you don’t think it’s fair to assume someone you barely know is trying to take your man that isn’t really your man.
“for all you know, they could be fucking behind doors.”
“grace!” you yell your friend’s name at such accusation, your ears turning red at even the thought of it.
“sorry,” she mutters, but barely meaning it, only shrugging off what needed to be said.
“i just don’t want you to be hurt in the end,” she says, voice a kind of sympathy you didn’t even know you need.
because yes, you think san is handsome. he is kind and unusually attentive to you for whatever reasons, and seeing someone else by his side made your stomach queasy all for the wrong reasons… but you don’t feel justified in feeling a certain way just because your friend says you should.
you’re not with him and you still don’t even know if you wanna be with him.
“trust me, grace,” you assure her, a confident smile settling on your lips that she only frowns to. “i’ll be fine.”
and as much as she wants to believe it, it’s hard not to doubt knowing the way you are.
how, though you’ve navigated through life barely getting romantically involved with boys, it wouldn’t be difficult for someone like san to get you wrapped around his fingers if he wants to.
the guy way too charming; how he just casually checks all criteria from looks to personality, the girl herself rooting for you and him initially, but quickly rethinking the choice after last night.
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bajoop-sheeb · 7 months
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PLEASE for the love of the universe read anti-colonial science fiction and fantasy written from marginalized perspectives. Y’all (you know who you are) are killing me. To see people praise books about empire written exclusively by white women and then turn around and say you don’t know who Octavia Butler is or that you haven’t read any NK Jemisin just kills me! I’m not saying you HAVE to enjoy specific books but there is such an obvious pattern here
Some of y’all love marginalized stories but you don’t give a fuck about marginalized creators and characters, and it shows. Like damn
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dappermouth · 2 months
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Strange and silent angels came to meet you in the field — to circle darkly overhead, to show you where to kneel.
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pangur-and-grim · 7 months
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I’m too gullible with people. I’ll have encounters and be like “aw they seemed nice ☺️” and then everyone around me will be like NONONONONO THAT WAS THE DEVIL!!!!!!!
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notherpuppet · 5 months
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Young Seraphim
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orcboxer · 2 years
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No amount of pain made anybody stronger. Strength is built, not fuckin carved.
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pbnmj · 1 year
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also by the way i am always obsessed with how spider-people just click and can work together without anything being said in spiderverse . mcu spiderman being like "omg ive never worked in a team” “how are we going to work together” “well im on a team so i’ll lead us" like that was the most boring way to do it . spiderverse instead saying "we just know how to work together because our histories and lives are so linked, its like knowing someone your whole life. seeing the self in the other. our lives rhyme.” LIKE I LOVE YOU GUYS
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skunkes · 3 months
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the restrained sniffer
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strawmaguchi · 2 months
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She’s just like me…. SHE’S JUST LIKE ME FR!!!!
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me, my boyfriend, and the 8 foot hole in the sand i dug for him because i love him
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uncanny-tranny · 1 year
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Amatonormativity has destroyed so many people's understanding and acceptance of themselves, and it's heartbreaking.
Yes, it is normal to be in your 20s, 30s, or older and not have lost your virginity, had a first kiss, or a partner. It is normal to say that you aren't ready for those things, too! It is normal if your life doesn't follow the "college graduate -> engagement -> buying a home -> 2.5 kids and a dog" trajectory that so many people have idealized.
So many people associate maturity with losing your virginity, or having a first kiss, or a serious relationship, and I think that's a dangerous association. Maturity isn't gained through those things, and you don't have to have those experiences to be considered "mature" or "grown." It is not a bad thing to go at your pace. Nobody else can live your life but you. If you end up having those experiences, that's great! But it should be done because you want to experience them, not because you feel "broken" and "immature" without them.
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imaveryevilenby · 1 month
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your dream ended. because of woke.
you laughed. because of joke.
frogs make noise. because of croak.
tree. oak.
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spearxwind · 2 months
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STRATOSPHERE CHASE
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vaguely-concerned · 3 months
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are. are you telling me that if the romanced mage warden dies and alistair is king, he deadass stares greagoir down over her dead body and grants the circle of ferelden its autonomy after ordering it rebuilt somewhere safer. first you have to deliberately leave him behind so he won't die for you and then he does that for you once you're gone, even when you're broken up??? absolute and literal king behaviour of the highest order????? the actions speak louder than words of it all??????? I think I hauve covid
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datcravat · 3 months
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I LOVE KAY
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bubblybloob · 3 months
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I find it very funny that supposedly every time our voices bicker and argue, the princess is just left there, totally unaware.
She seemingly acknowledges this too! After a while of back and forth in our mind, she’ll pipe up because she’s noticed we’ve gotten lost in our thoughts. She must think we have trouble with zoning out. She’s not necessarily wrong, I guess.
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