#like ''goddamn u were kinda ass to me but my kid likes u and u arent ass to them so ig its fine. why werent u like that w me tho :(''

[sk-yay-sk]

Athena, Odysseus, and Telemachus are that thing where your mom is nicer to your kids than she ever was to you

[thatdeadaquarius]

Heyo, Idk if you still do sagau but I hope you do 🙏🙏 anyway, this is lowkey wholesome but imagine one of acolytes were trying to communicate with a child but then they realize the child is deaf but reader so happened to be nearby. So then, whatever the character is saying the reader translates into sign language and its just a wholesome sight to see. Btw srry if this isn't what you usually write 😓 add anything to this if you want

OH NO THIS IS EXACTLY ALL THAT I WRITE RN ANON DW MY LOVE 😍

(*update: im so stupid i thought ur sunglasses pfp was a anon and didnt look any closer💀i aint livin this one down)

(Spoiler: i do plan to do imagines for other fandoms bc i have such niche AUs or ideas for them, a lot like this whole language stuff for Genshin Sagau :D )

IVE WANTED TO LEARN ASL FOR SO LONG BUT I HAVENT GOTTEN THE CHANCEEE theres no classes for it where i live ;/

THAT IS TO SAY I LIVEEE FOR COMMUNICATION STUFFFFF

Also srry its kinda short i just could only think of this cute little scenario- 😗

Rest in peace bc i have a whole fat post i wanna make about neurodivergence + general accessibility issues in Teyvat and their countries

Like where r the ramps babe

Where r the non-narrow ass doors

Why r we just constantly made to hike up mountains when we dont have to

And dont come at me with that,

"Theyre in their medieval age! They cant make stuff like that!"

Yeah, u right, they cant.

If they dont be ✨️creative ✨️and they dont use their fucking ✨️magic ✨️

Liyue got floating rocks and they cant make a goddamn disability elevator?? Bitch tf?

THAT IS TO SAY IN A VERY RANTING COUGHPASSIVE AGGRESSIVE AT GENSHIN COMMUNITY FOR NOT REPPING DISABILITIES MORECOUGH

WAY OF SAYINGGGG

Literally almost no one gets sign language in Teyvat

(despite the fact that in my perfect teyvat, sign lang. is superior bc everyone could make it the universal lang. ESP if we go by the cool AU of diff countries have diff languages, like Germanish lang for Mondstadt, Frenchish for Fontaine, etc.)

Off topic again srry-

◇

But you took a class once!! Or even checked out the alphabet and casual convo on ur own time :D

So u just chillin with Kazuha, Thoma, Sara, Gorou, and Kokomi (they vistin the main island to see u!! :] )

Meanwhile a little girl is walking around nearby, and is kinda going in circles

Almost like shes scared to go too far one way or the other,

So being the caring soul he is, (rlly all these boys here rn would notice and help lol)

Thoma comes up to her and squats down trying to talk to her :)

...

Yeah, she didn't say anything, just kinda,,

Motioned with her hands??

She looks like shes doing some kind of code to them..

Oh!

Thoma finally recognized this, its that hand language!! lmao hes got the spirit

so he asks Kazuha to try and see if he knows it or can even figure it out-

Nope. Nada de nada.

Then Kokomi, Sara and Gorou (whos a sweatin nervous mess he doesnt know how to act around kids esp kids in distress he seems like the type lol)

They all fail, Kokomi looks concerned bc she thinks the kids lost, but there no frantic parents nearby, Sara is trying to slowly understand what motions mean what i.e. points to a rock = learn sign from child etc,

Kazuha is trying to get the wind to help locate upset guardians nearby, and Gorou...

... is just 🧍‍♂️

LMAOOO

◇

So after a minute of this (bc u had originally been away at a street food vender, hey those dango were rlly good dont judge urself)

U come back, and see this mild flavor of chaos-

And are just like

"Oh ffs- just shoo, i got it guys"

And just, slowly, go thru some signs with the little girl to get the keywords at least

She lights up and is like bouncing, she goes hella fast at first but slows down when she gets ur hearing

Either way, she looks a lot happier now

U explain for her to the others to confirm her parents got seperated from her

She got lost and where she last saw them

u finally help escort her to the street she last saw her parents on :] !!

◇

Meanwhile the whole allogene group, shopkeepers, and Inazumans around you:

😦😯🥰🥺💓💞💘💖

Kokomi is holding back a squeal, shes gotta keep up her image, ahem-

Sara is like,, minutely vibrating?? Lmao

Kazuha is watching u like a fireworks show, intensely and yet fascinated

GOROU'S TAIL IS KINDA WAGGINGGG AW LOL

And Thoma just looks like a puddle of affection, just absolutely melted (he loves kids + he secretly loves you = dead Thoma)

Other people look weirdly, proud? Like theyre like "yeah thats our god, fuck yeah, knowing diff languages, go off, Your Grace 💅 " LMAO SORRY COULDNT RESIST and also some fascination

♡

Anyway, 2 very stressed looking dads see yall and the girl and one of them run up to hold each other

She starts rapidly signing, explaining to her dads the adventure she had and the cool people she met <3

The dads look at u and r like 🤔😶😱 "YOUR MAJESTY??!!" (VIGOROUS HAND MOTIONS)

They sign like,

"We're terribly sorry about you seeing us like this, we usually are much more together than this, a crowd just swept her off, its very busy today. Thank you so much for helping our girl, my Lord!! 😭😭"

Theyre like almost crying, oh geez, u reassure them and sign back that it happens to any parent at some point and that is matters more that they tried to get her back :]

◇

Meanwhile the rest of the group and the citizens are just watching yall like its the most amazing Olympic level tennis match in the world LMAO

Heads all in sync, watchin yall like 👋👍🙏LMAO IM SORRY

AW IT SUCKS ABOUT WRITING BC I CANT RLLY DEPICT SIGN LANGUAGE AS COOL AS I CAN IN COMICS OR THRU ART

THE EMOJI HANDS NEED SIGN LANGUAGE DAMMIT-

♡

🎵 Hi, it's me. I'm the problem, it's me. 🎵

That is to say none of yalls asks r eaten up, at least im pretty sure? Dw abt it im chugging along having the time of my life hehe >:)

Yall are fEEDIN ME TONIGHT!!

Hope yall r having a good weekend and have no hw if ur in school, or i hope ur shift goes good tomorrow! :]

Love yall!!

Cheers,

🌒🌧🌊Aquarius♒️🌌🌘

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist

[goth-mami-writer]

A post about my life lately.

(If you fucking care ✌️🫠)

⚠️Tw: There's some mentions in this that may stir certain emotions regarding✨️pro-choice✨️mindsets (abortion) and vomiting. So if you think that's gonna upset you, don't interact pls. Thx.⚠️

Soooooooo-

I've been away. And here's why without being theatrical - I found out I was pregnant again. And....I wasn't happy.

I'm a mom to 1 already and...I knew that I couldn't do it again. It's hard, to be as frank as I can. The physical effect of pregnancy on the body is something...I despise? I had awful, TERRIBLE sickness the first time anddd fuck, it was the same this time.

Yeah, no. You can go ahead and count me out.

Well- Were you using BiRtH CoNtrOl?!, you may ask?

Yes. Abso-fuckin-lutely. I had an IUD inserted two months after I had my first kid. Cause FUCK THAT. I knew I didn't want another. My son's awesome. Being his mom is my reason for living. But pregnancy is not for me.

So- this being the decision, I fucking called the one person I goddamn trust and that's Mera. ❤️ @short-honey-badger

And bitch, did we plan a trip. We had to drive OUT OF OUR STATE TO RECEIVE THE CARE NECESSARY. (That's a topic for another day tho t-.-t )

✨️Anyways,✨️ Mera is a badass and drove me to said appointment as I'm fighting the most debilitating nausea. All I could stand to eat without vomiting was fucking popsicles and slushies. So yum at 5 am, BTW.

~But here's where shit gets wild~

I show up, ready to have this done. Get on with my life. Maybe start writing again because I know that I'll feel better. The nurses and staff were incredible and sweet. But there was one problem.....my IUD was out of place, they tell me.

Okay? I knew that, right? Obviously, that's why it didn't work and I got pregnant. Makes sense.

NONONONO. I'm laying on a table out of my home state, laughing gassed out of MY FUCKING MIND, with a lady doctor telling me in the calmest demeanor that she can that I need FUCKING ✨️EMERGENCY SURGERY✨️

LIKE. HOW DO YOU REACT...TO THAT?

So...the staff is obviously letting me recover from the procedure- THE ONE I JUST HAD. and now I'm being fed all this medical jargon basically saying that if I didn't receive surgery, this IUD was gonna tear its way into my other organs because it was already embedded in the muscle tissue of my abdomen.

Fucking AWESOME.

Luckily, all these people were contracted to the local hospital in this city and they were going to let them know I was coming over and all that good jazz, but I basically needed to get over there. Like...now. RIGHT NEOW. 💀

So then it's me and Mera just navigating parts of a city that we just DO NOT fucking know, trying to get me to said hospital where this surgery needed to take place. It wasn't far but goddamn this hospital had absolute SHIT parking. It was a monster to fucking navigate as well. Luckily, I was on some good pain meds that were keeping me kinda stable, but ooohhhh, not for long.

We get checked into the ER and yeah, I started HURTING. Not to mention also, viciously nauseous once again. But this time, because I hadn't eaten anything since 5am and I was told that it would basically be fucking ILLEGAL for me to eat again until I got off this operating table.

Fucking. AWESSOMMEE.

(I thought you said it was an emergency, why didn't they have you in OR yet??)

I HAD TO WAIT FOR THESE MFS TO GET THERE, HOLD ON.

My particular case needed staffing of crazy ass doctors to oversee this procedure. I swear to God, I met like 5 people in the four hours that I sat in the emergency room before being prepped for surgery.

I was rolled out for testing like four different times! All kinds of shit just being shot into my IV while I'm still fucked up on the first dose of morphine that's still whooping my ass in and out of consciousness as Mera is at my bedside like,

"O.o u okay?" (Bc she's an angel that stayed with me during the entirety of this fucking insanity like T-T)

FINALLY. I got into my fucking surgery. It went fine, everything is fine. But goddamn, I'm exhausted. Mera was exhausted. We'd been up for almost 24hrs at this point in the day and now I'm finally being admitted into an actual room for post-op recovery.

That next morning before my discharge, I was let know the gravity of my situation and things like that. I was reassured that nothing I did caused this IUD to move. And that meant one thing-

It was never inserted correctly in the first place.

✨️So✨️ let me be the first one to tell you- please. For the love of FUCK. Go get your IUD checked. Via fucking ultrasound.

Don't let that sassy nurse stick a speculum in your fuggin hoo-haa and tell you she can see the strings so you're good.

Guess what? EVERYONE SAW MY STRINGS TOO.

Check your IUD!!! Or you're gonna be knocked up, getting a little pregnancy✨️deletion✨️ in a strange state where a really nice lady doctor is gonna tell you that you're like weeks away from internally bleeding and need dire abdominal surgery to prevent that. And all you're gonna have is your bestfriend who you feel terrible for bc she didn't sign up for any of this bullshit. But there you are, passed out on morphine, hungry, confused, nauseous and WAITING FOR SURGEONS.

GO TO THE GYNECOLOGIST. NEOW. 💀

[theangelsheardyou]

At the hospital rn so here are some headcanons of bsd men with cats

Chuuya:

- *cat meows* *he meows back*

- likes cats that are chubby

- if someone so much as says "heck" in front of his beautiful little baby he will go on a rampage

- "WHICH ONE OF YOU MOTHERFUCKERS HAS BEEN SWEARING IN FRONT OF MY LITTLE GIRL"

- absolutely spoils the shit out of his cat

- BTW it's a black one with elegant green eyes and she's a total bitch but that's why he loves her

- same spoiled rich bitch energy

- they were made for each other

- he def rants about dazai to her

- idk abt a name yet but I'm thinking he'd name her something fancy like a type of wine or an author of an old book he likes or smth

- they look like they judge people together

- they absolutely do

- if you think ur safe no u are not

- she does not like dazai AT ALL

- whenever he sees her he tries to be friendly and even give her treats but she just hisses or ignores him

- *dazai enters chuuyas apartment (uninvited)* heya Eleanor!

Eleanor: *hisses*

Dazai: okay! :D

Dazai:

- ohhh dazai's cat would absolutely despise him

- it's not really his cat, it just kinda keeps coming back to him for food

- whenever he tries to be affectionate with it it just hisses or bites him

- but it still keeps coming back the next day

- hmmmm sounds like a certain someone

- he also gets the shittest cat foods ever

- "heyyyy I hope you like this new tuna I got ya!!! It's chocolate flavored :)"

- the cat will def vomit on his shoes

- it's happened more often than u think

- BTW it's an orange tabby that he likes cause it's mean and orange and reminds him of someone

- GEE I WONDER WHO

Fyodor:

- fyodor has the most spoiled snooty ass little Persian cat in the whole entire world

- it looks exactly like the ones you see in cartoons

- she's all white with pretty blue eyes and a nice little collar that costs like 10,000 in usd

- I can also see him with a cat like chuuyas, u know the ones villains in movies usually have

- tje black pointy slender ones

- you'd walk into his lair or smth and it's all dark and it's just him in his chair facing you and caressing the cat on his lap

- me next me next ME NEXT ME NE

- it also acts like his own personal spy, by lurking around his enemies (dazai) and finding out all sorts of dirt on them (his love for chuuya) and bringing them to fyodor for him to exploit (putting a hand on his forehead and eyes going "the gays are at it again")

Nikolai:

- your friendly neighborhood animal abuser😝

- u know that cat from the start of princess and the frog???

- the one that lottie had when she was a kid???

- yea it's like that

- bro torments the SHIT out of that poor kitty (mine next please please)

- he would come home and just throw it into the air as a greeting

- his ceiling is covered in cat scratches from every time he's done it

- atp he would just randomly go "Hey where nikolai junior???" Like he's Phineas and Ferb looking for perry meanwhile his poor tortured cat is hiding from him somewhere

- he would bring that thing everywhere

- airport, barbers, hospital, restaurant, PRISON

- "sir you can't have pets in here" "awww why not :((((" "because this is a correctional facility"

- he'd be with the gang😎 and sigma jus goes "nikolai....what's in your shirt???" And he's like wdym?? And sigma goes "it's...meowing?? What have you got in there???" And nikolai has to answer very carefully bc of all the times fyodor has told him NOT TO BRING HIS GODDAMN CAT INTO THEIR MEETINGS so he just smiles sweatily and says "drugs" which for him is honestly way more believable but fyodor just sighs

Anyway that's all I got for now wish me luck at the hoptal guys :DDD

[servicpop]

ZO THE BRO :D

SOME CALLAHN DRABBLE CUZ I DREAMT OF GETTING BACKSHOTS FROM HIM 😋

this man is probably in his like late 30s going to 40s and after many failed tries at relationships in his 20s he probably decided to dedicate his life to being a detective only using his hand for relief when it's really necessary ( he thinks lust is a distraction 😪) so when he was put on a case to catch you he stopped for like a few months till he caught you, sure yeah you were pretty and everyone was eyeing you like a piece of candy or wtv but dude just wanted to introgate you so they put you in a cell till they got their schedule free but you being the best criminal in the area breaks free👌👌 he tracks you down to a...motel??? at first he thought it was a trap till he dug around some more only to find that it was kid of a hideout spot for some criminals including you it also had a casino and strip club which made sense to him kinda? NOW THIS CAN GO BOTH WAYS

FIRST : You went there cus you had no cash n u needed some so what better way to do it then rob some money off of old nasty guys :3 so being the pretty little thing you are you work your ass off in a firly bunny outfit yk the classic leather one with the ears and clip on tail that barely hides anything, and like always you were a hit everyone loves you getting more than 1000 as tip from one guy, callahan walks in ready to bust your ass and some other criminals thinking you were some prevert like the other men here only to find that you in fact were not a watcher you were the whole show yourself and damn the second he saw you he forgot why he was doing this whole thing, of course you spotted him and walked out to him after the show he let you go this once only if you never utter a word to anyone about him not being able to move an inch after seeing ( and the tent in his pants as well )

OR

SECOND OPTION : he tracks down your location to the hotel or motel wtv and goes to the lobby pointing a gun to the receptionist head asking which room were you in, they give him the room with the keys telling him which floor you're on, he goes to the room breaking the door down expecting you to have a gun or be armed he was ready for shooting anyways but you were no where to be found?? your stuff was there but you weren't, he was gonna go and yell at the receptionist before he heard soft humming from the bathroom, bingo, he breaks down the door (mans got an obsession with breaking down doors like a badass cop, cannon I was the door )

only to find you showing catching you (and him) off gaurd, all sounds stopped registering and you swear you sww him drooling, zoning out taking I every inch (sorry its a bit freaky :3) he only focused again when you stopped the water and approached him slowly with the classic "how about I help you out and you let me go this time ?" looking down at his not so obvious tent, you offer him a blow job and goddamn he saw white like pure white man couldn't even comprehend what was happening silently cursing him self for missing out on this much pleasure, he felt drunk but off of blow jobs?? he didn't even think that that was possible, he let you go ofc cuz he's a man of his word only after filling your throat for 20 times :] hands? what wandering hands? Well yeah maybe he did let his hand roam your body focusing here and there but hey that's only to hear your pretty noises while they try to come out but all they could heard as were muffled moans and sobs as you choke on him, sure he made you cum 3 times but taht wa sonly to see your reaction ! can you blame him? he did all that to help with the bj, hey you're the one that offered he's just adding little touches

I MIGHTVE GOTTEN CARRIED AWAY A BIT I APOLOGISE 🙏 BUT WHAT DO WE THINK DOES THIS HAVE POTENIAL TO BECOME A FANFIC???

take my job nonnie !! this is so delicious ... and yes this will probably be the plot of the next Callahan fic ( maybe after awhile cuz I have a Callahan domestic au drabble in the making and I wanna give Adrien some love again )

[emptykhr]

Twisted wonderland as lana del rey songs

Riddle ( Wildflower Wildfire)

im sorry but THIS SONG ITS SO HIM honestly is most because him relatioship with his mother

the part where lana sang about her mother in the hospital. SO HIM

either, all the stuff about flowers warm and things like that remind of him!!

Here's the deal My father never stepped in when his wife would rage at me So I ended up awkward, but sweet Later then, hospitals, stand still on my feet Comfortably numb, but with lithium came poetry

Trey (Chemtrails over the country club)

So, trey and cottc, the same vibe.

yknow, all the peace and normal life stuff in the lyrics reminds me trey plot

im truly can see trey playing this song with his wife in a beutiful afternoon.

Washing my hair, doing my laundry Late night TV, I want you only Like when we were kids Under chemtrails in country clubs It's never too late, baby So don't give up

Cater (beautiful people, beutiful problems)

I gonna be honest, lust for life its so cater vibes!!

i confess that was hard to think in a song who matche cater plot, cause i wanna something kinda pop bu it still about him second face

The i just came bpbp.

We get so tired and we complain 'Bout how it's hard to live It's more than just a video game

Ace (Diet mountain dew)

Ace has to be born to die and i fight with u if you disagree.

BABY YOU NOT GOOD FOR ME

to be honestly this song is how i feel about ace

Diet Mountain Dew, baby, New York City Never was there ever a girl so pretty Do you think we'll be in love forever? Do you think we'll be in love?

Deuce (How to disappear)

WAIT I CAN EXPLAIN

well, in the lyrics lana sang abou that guy who lost in himself and fight every night

and we know that deuce is a ex deliquent

and idk, this song is sweet like deuce mas match with him a lot

just read the lyric and you will understand

Joe met me down at the training yard Got cuts on his face 'cause he fought too hard I know he's in over his head But I love that man like nobody can He moves mountains and pounds them to ground again I watched the guys getting high as they fight For the things that they hold dear To forget the things they fear

Leona (Norman fucking rockwell)

OMG FINALLY

guys, nfr its SO LEONA

the part where "goddam man child' yknow? period.

You guys can say "but leona is more ultraviolence" MY ASS

nfr king i said so its true.

Goddamn, man-child You fucked me so good that I almost said: I love you You're fun, and you're wild But you don't know the half of the shit that you put me through Your poetry's bad, and you blame the news But I can't change that, and I can't change your mood Ah-ah

Ruggie (god know i tried)

Now we have a honeymoon dude!!!

nothing to say, the song say itself

i even need to explain?

Sometimes, I wake up in the morning To red, blue and yellow lights On Monday, they destroyed me But by Friday, I'm revived

Jack (wild ate heart)

Jack my baby.

this song. jack. the same.

its just what how a imagine jack

I left Calabasas, escaped all the ashes Ran into the dark And it made me wild, wild, wild at heart The cameras have flashes, they cause the car crashes But I'm not a star

Azul (money power glory)

I kinda always think in azul when mpg starts to play.

could be million dollar man tho but mpg is better

the chore is him.

I want money, power and glory I want money, and all your power, all your glory Alleluia! I wanna take you for all that you got Alleluia! I'm gonna take them for all that they got

Jade (old money)

omg my ultraviolence guy is here!!!

he SO lana del rey vinyl

old money makes my cry everytime

My father's love was always strong My mother's glamour lives on and on Yet still inside, I felt alone For reasons unknown to me

flyod (doin time)

I LOVE HOW FLOYD HAS THE SAME VIBE WITH THE DOIN TIM GURL

fuck even THE SAME MBTI

yeah he´s a bitch and we love it!!

Evil, I've come to tell you that she's evil, most definitely Evil, ornery, scandalous and evil, most definitely The tension, it's getting hotter I'd like to hold her head underwater (Summertime) (Ah, ah, ah)

so, english its not my first language so you probably will found mistakes. maybe i do a second part

[xoxojisu]

MY THOUGHTS ON THE FINAL HASHIRA TRAINING ARC THAT NO ONE ASKED FOR BUT I WILL BE SHARING

first of all.

why did they animate muzans walk for SO GODDAMN LONG. like okay ik big deal bc KIBUTSUJI MUZAN 👹👹 is here and like suspense is rly important and yadayadaya but like BRO. i could've baked a wedding cake in that time like WHAT. i wanted to just press the +10s button so bad the whole time but i convinced myself the suspense would like add to my experience and i needed to sit in my anticipation bc this is how ur supposed to watch it but i got so impatient like bruh its not that hard just WALK.

secondly!

idk why but the hashira desperation to run run run was so entertaining. like after i finished the ep i rewound it just to see them like running to the mansion. i have no idea why i js rly thoroughly enjoyed that part for some reason. like the "get there in time!!"' and "oyakata-sama!"' stuff was just so fun to see like yesss run run run (do i have a problem)

same thing applies for when gyomei was like "THIS BITCH IS HIM" and they all went like *widened eyes* 😳THATS HIM?!?!?!!!?!😳 like it was just so fun to see

same for like when they all started releasing attacks on him?? like they all went ___ breathing, ___ form!! and i was like YESSS GET HIMMMMMM. so upset they didnt js like kick his ass. like ik it would've been a terrible way to end everything and stuff but like. i kinda js wanted a simple clean like 40 minute fight scene with js like all the hashira + tanjiro vs KIBUTSUJI MUZAN DUN DUN DUN!! but like obvi that'd be kinda anticlimactic and muzan cant go down that easily but like still. WHOOP ASS. WHOOP ASS. WHOOP ASS.

thirdly!

muzan is rly fucking hot im ngl

KIDDING WHAT?!?!?!?!?! crazy why would u think that... (ik u agree dont try to lie to me rn.)

fourth point!!!!

idk why but i had no idea amane was oyakata-sama's wife. anyways.

fifth point!

i was lowk kinda let down?? like ik this ep was like an essential transition and stuff but when i saw 40 mins as a non-manga reader i was hyped bc i thought it would be this like rly cool episode full of fighting and important details and while yes it was like rly important i was kinda sad that there wasn't more conflict and fighting. like yeah oyakata-sama died and all but he was dead like 10 yrs ago bro

sixth!!

i am so hyped for the next arc but like they said its gonna be a movie?!?!?! bruh. ARE U FR. listen im like not the type of girl who could like go out to her local theater and see the freaking demon slayer movie like no. (im shy) which means im gonna have to dodge spoilers for MONTHS and then wait for MONTHS for it to come out so i can watch it at home in the safety of my bed. its gonna be the hq movie all over again (if anyone has any good piracy websites for hq movie + the demon slayer movie once its out lmk!!)

seventh noteeeee

that whole end credit scene with rengoku?? was it like a casual dead-mentor encouragement thing or was it like foreshadowing that he'll be rly important in the next arc

eighth note!!

i thought that *angry sanemi running noises* were so funny i was literally giggling

that is all goodnight

[borathae]

chapter 15

Can’t you like it for me?” he says with big puppy eyes.

You look away.

“You’re being emotionally manipulative here.” shut up girl im loving u too much i cant

“You are playing with fire here, Bunny. Try not to burn yourself”, you grumble.

He chuckles and pecks your cheek.

“I like the burn”, he rasps against the shell of your ear, turning to the front afterwards.

SHUT UP IM CANT TAKE IT. try not to lose your shit challenge- mission failed successfully

He treated you so goddamn fucking well that sometimes you still felt the urge to punch him in the face and run away jk in the corner, i'll take that as a compliment

Lately the latter have become more and more. YAY

“Hey kiddo. How are you doing?” he says in a surprisingly deep voice for such a small frame. me with felix and taehyung

“for half a million bucks I expect to have the painter constantly working on it in a metal cage in the middle of my living room or something.” - ........ - a few bystanders had heard you and were now looking at you with weird eyes. SHUT UP THATS SOO ME except my voice would be low and nobody would hear but could be loud too cuz universe makes it louder at times when u dont want anyone to hear shit

although he was stressed and exhausted he never once smelled of alcohol. AHHHH IM SO PROUD OF HIM *gives a big ass hug and a smooch

WHY DOES NERO'S SHOULDERS LOOK FAMILIAR TO HER AND WHY DOES SHE LOOK FAMILIAR TO HIM AHHH STOP I HATE IT THIS CHAPTER IS A ROLLERCOASTER

again a fluffy moment after the tense thank you, her threatening to buy green and purple pillows PLZ that sounds like me trying to threaten my parents by telling them im gonna marry a cat crazy dude

“I’m not asking for it. I am very much anti punishment uwu i love this stupid noodle

He swallows heavily, “a-are we going to make out now?” he asks, grasping for your hips. he is such a cute and horny noodle pls and no u are about to cringe for the rest of your office time

FUCK GET YOURSELF A MAN WHO CAN FIGHT FOR YOU IMMEDIATELY

“don’t say that what the hell my cock twitched.”

“I am not going to apologize because I am way too turned on to care.”

He looks from side to side with the tip of his nose rosy.

“What’s with the sudden horniness oh my god?”

“It’s just that I never really saw you work before and it’s kinda doing things to me.” SAME HERE IM FEELING IM WATCHING SOME HOT CEO FROM KDRAMA BUT EVEN BETTER AAAAH

It makes his ass cheeks tense up and forces a quiet whimper from between his lips. SHUT UP SHUT UP HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO MOVE ON FROM THIS MOVE ON WITH MY DAILY LIFE????? VANESSA HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LIVE LAUGH LOVE IN THESE SITAUTIONS ??

I REPEAT HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LIVE LAUGH LOVE IN THESE SITUATIONS??? JIWOO SOUNDS SIERIOUS OH SHIT NOW SHE KNOWS AAAH

WHY IS SHE CONNECTING THE DOTS SOMETIMES CHARACTERS SHOULD BE DUMB PLEASEEEE also why is there a group of people surrounding kook??? 👀

the whole thing was soo tense i sweated through my shirt now im a stinky kid -_- BUT WE LOVED IT the emotions was captured soo well and he was supportive yet very unsupportive if your brain's going haywire with an anxiety/panic attack

Twirling him threw him straight into subspace. *insert meme i hope i dont fall, her: twirls him kook : oh no mommy

the mom is sweet AND I CANT STAND THE DAD UGHHH

i prayed for her to not go to the mirror AND SHE DID NOO its really the worst thing to do during a panic attack :(

that was soo scary even i felt the uncontrollable demons while reading and thanks it ended on a good note and it was cute.

anyways i wish her a great day next morning(tho the story has ended) cuz them muscles be hurting like a bitch oof

Me reading through all your reactions:

hahahahha I love how you went on an emotional rollercoaster with this chapter jfdjsf also you quoting so many parts is my weakness hehehe thank you so much for doing that

BROORORORO THE TWIRLING PART WAS THE ONE OF THE FIRST TIMES I WENT "oh fuck i have a mommy kink" LIKE IDK IF YOU GUYS KNOW BUT AAOL WAS MY MOMMY KINK AWAKENING FADSFAHH

[flannelepicurean]

Had a dream where I was standing around in a park in the Cobra Kai universe, watching the kids under Johnny Lawrence's tutelage do something REALLY awesome. Naturally, I was like, "Wow, that's fuckin' awesome." And then Johnny looks over at me, all perplexed, and goes, "WTF, who are you?" And I was like, "...uhhh...you can see me?" And he was like, "...Yeah??? Who are you? What's your deal, dude?"

And I was hit with a conundrum, because I was clearly not in MY universe anymore, so there were good odds that my cell phone would not work (it didn't), and damn sure my credit cards were a non-starter. And I was shooketh. So I was like, "Uhhh...it's kind of a long story, man. But...I guess I'm kinda...stranded here...and I don't really know where I am...and I kinda have...nothing...and I don't know how to get back home...fuck...Gonna level with you, sensei, it's lookin' pretty bad, here."

And he, being Johnny Lawrence, just kinda nodded stoically and was like, "I know that feel, dude. I got u bro. We're gonna fix this. EAGLE FANG, FALL IN!"

And my heart soared JUST LIKE an eagle, and I thought to myself, "Oh. Ohhhh, this is amazing, this is HAPPENING, I am the luckiest boy in the world, this is gonna be a DUMPSTER FIRE, and I get to ride it RIGHT INTO THE SEA..."

No clue how Johnny Lawrence was gonna mastermind an inter-dimensional portal crisis for my chaotic goblin ass, but good goddamn, there is not enough popcorn in the world, and you KNOW for a stone-cold FACT that I was gonna "yes, and" every single choice along the way. Because I love him just that much.

[4dtk]

anon: “hewoo !! umm can you make nct ideal type like age , apperance , height , cute or sexy etc 🌬️” let’s fuckin GOOOO. i’ll be using gender neutral terms for this! please tell me if i used she/her for any part as i’m more used to writing for fem readers!

sorry this took like almost a week i’ve been really busy lately, i apologise! under a cut because its so long lol

disclaimer: tons of “i feel”s and “i think”s; plus, this is just my headcanons of the boys! remember that all of you are beautiful and lovely and special in ur own way!! <3

TAEIL

i feel like taeil would want someone closer to his age (+/-), unless,,, UNLESS he finds someone he really clicks with (like haechan for eg) if they’re at a younger age

if he really does then taeil will 100% make the effort

ngl taeil would love a person taller than him, would worship the shit outta them 

if he gets teased for being shorter he doesnt care LMAO this man will have his hand around your middle and eye the other person mockingly

would love when you own your appearance with confidence, he likes to be by your side to admire how comfortable you feel in your skin

see him being a more traditional man by dating a korean person, but if he’s attracted to someone not of his race, i can see him making the effort

appearance? maybe someone who cleans up well, in a sense who’s a bit proper in their hygiene and like hair or accessories ig. he doesn’t mind what you wear tho, personally leaning more towards the comfy styles of cardigans and baggy clothes.

JOHNNY

either wants someone younger or older… i’m leaning more towards a younger s/o though bc he naturally has a “taking care” kinda vibe, and it’s sweet to see since he naturally takes care of the younger members like mark and haechan

wants to SMOTHER his s/o so i also think he’d want someone shorter than him. the man is a fucking skyscraper lawd

generally likes to give love A LOT since he’s an only child and wants to share that affection with someone who aren’t his parents or the members

but, but, like taeil, i see him really liking being held by his s/o, not just in a small spoon but laying on your chest, lying in between your legs with his head on ur tummy… so cute

i feel like johnny wouldn’t care much for appearance, nor your race since he kinda has the freedom to engage in english conversation. likes a cutesy positive vibe that can share the positivity and happiness he radiates normally!!

TAEYONG

feel like he would go for someone a tad bit older than he is, bc he likes to be taken care of

looking over the members can become really tiring and he needs some sort of solace to relax in

honestly if you’re younger too, he wouldn’t mind, he just needs to be babied LOL

likes tall people… ngl…

would like someone more in tune with their emotion and just not afraid to speak their mind? he likes confidence tbh

can see him going for a foreign person if he’s really passionate about them, would learn english/your native language 

taeyong likes a person that likes their outfits and doesn’t care what you wear out as long as you feel comfortable in it

would prefer more of a calm s/o, but easy-going and fun when they want to be

YUTA

doesnt really care for age tbh. if you’re able to bring him happiness and love him he doesn’t mind whether you’re older or younger

shorter 100%. wants to hold you very much, big spoon, the one holding you in the relationship

would go for a foreign person, but honestly, would want someone he can speak japanese with too. even he has shotaro now, he wants like just a closer person to confide in and also just share lil cute inside jokes with <3

yuta just wants his s/o to be themselves. just. yes. (i mean unless your personality is shit but he doesnt want someone to put on a front with him)

although he also likes cute people… he just wants to pamper u and make u feel like you’re the only one

KUN

goddamn, six kids plus three pets? this man is hanging on by a thread, but he would like a younger and shorter s/o

what’s one more right? 

also naturally has the taking care vibes like johnny, but there’s just something so… dom… about him AHASHFHEHR

would lean more toward a chinese- or korean-speaking s/o but

doesn’t mind a foreign s/o IF they make the effort. he would if he knows you would too. 

kun is lowkey energetic tbh and would want someone who can read the room of whether he’s comfy enough to let loose and remain the ‘parental’ figure

cute people i think will attract him, but oh my gosh when you’re self-assured? WHEW he really likes that, how you’re uncaring of people’s opinions regarding your appearance or personality

DOYOUNG

doesn’t mind older or younger or the same age, although i seem him gravitating toward an older s/o

this man is also 100% stressed. needs to be held, there’s a balance though in your relationship of who holds who though

would stay dating a korean/korean-speaking person i feel. not saying he wouldn’t make the effort but he takes his idol life very seriously and the outcomes if he were to get together with someone who doesnt speak his native tongue

he would want someone proper, like taeil, and would prefer his s/o to be cute and stuff

doyoung needs to know what you want though, so you’ll need to be sure of your choices basically

would like it more if his s/o was calm and just collected bc like taeyong, he needs a haven to relax in when he’s done for the day or when he needs to recharge

TEN

same age or older s/o !!! wants to be taken care of, this man also has a lot of love to give, altho they’re towards selective people like his members, pets, you

would gravitate towards tall people i feel

you need to love leon and louis. period. bella is a hot second.

ten would want an s/o who supports him wholeheartedly, seeing as he has so many talents that sometimes he gets caught up in showing talent for his idol life as opposed to creating things for himself. it’s easy to get lost in the pressure of the media to put out content that he feels is half- assed.

ten knows of his worth, but sometimes he just needs a bit of confirmation and support from the right people to truly create and post what he wants to

he would date a partner who doesn’t speak korean/chinese. he has english and thai and basic japanese baby!!! but yea, he def wouldn’t mind a foreign partner AND would go search up on resources to learn your native tongue!

another person who doesn’t care about how you dress. nor how you look as long as you’re being yourself!

JAEHYUN

oh, younger definitely and a shorter s/o

definitely doesn’t mind an english speaking s/o, although he would prefer someone who can speak korean as well. with s/o’s of other languages, he wouldn’t mind learning your language, although give him some time

the language barrier will be a bit awkward a first tho, but if you know minimal english, i think that’s more than enough for jaehyun to at least steer the convo!

jaehyun is the guy to always give me first love, love from high school vibes so he’s usually the one to embrace you, but LOVES it when you’re the one to initiate contact and affection

jaehyun knows he’s good looking, but he does want an s/o who loves him for who he is, who sees all his good traits as equal to his looks. he would also like an s/o who has a live in the moment mindset, bc he spends a lot of time in his idol life, that a carefree s/o to take him away from the stress of idol life would really help

a sucker for a cute style ngl, pastels and clips in your hair and stuff. 

WINWIN

wouldn’t mind someone a tad bit older, although i can see him with a younger person/same aged person too

shorter s/o!

sicheng wouldn’t care much for appearance, but he likes it when his s/o is confident, or in general confidence attracts him like the other guys in this post. that confidence would allow for him to be ‘guided’ in the relationship

would lean more towards a chinese/korean speaking person, but would try forming a r/s with someone of a different race to see how the language barrier would work

someone who is respectful of his space 100%. winwin wants someone who knows their boundaries in a context that there’s this sense of “i know when he’s feeling upset and wants to be left alone”, something like unspoken exchanges that the other just understands

sicheng also likes when his s/o is a little playful and cheeky, but not to the extent of the boys. just the right amount of outgoingness i guess haha. he would accommodate a bit of wildness, but sometimes it tires him out so you’ll need to know when to tone it down

JUNGWOO

feel like he would lean to an older s/o, but not necessarily needing to keep him in check because you’d be on the other side entertaining his antics lol

jungwoo uses up a lot of his energy tho, so sometimes he tends to go quiet and just likes to slump in your embrace

when he’s not quiet tho, he’s pretty cheeky in a sneaky kinda way and would want someone to reciprocate that.

jungwoo would also like an s/o who cheers him on a lot. he’s a bit insecure naturally, so he would want someone who doesn’t miss a beat to tell him that he’s doing good that day and would like a random compliment sometimes

would like to be held more than holding someone tbh

he wouldn’t care much for appearance, but does lean more towards cutesy appearances

LUCAS

younger and shorter s/o

would want an s/o to just calm down and rest with at times. sure he likes to have fun with his members and with his partner, but most dates with his partner has him in their arms and usually involves a calm activity

i mentioned this in chenle’s one as well, but the happiness he feels with his members is different from the one he feels with his partner, although lucas’ one is more of a blur where chenle’s a bit more distinct. does this make sense

wouldn’t ask much in an s/o, tbh. even if they’re just doing nothing, as long as lucas know he’s making you happy then he’s content with that. like when you’re smiling and loving him, then that’s all he really needs to be honest

lucas would not mind taking up an r/s with a foreign s/o, although he would have trouble with language barriers. would prefer a chinese/catonese speaking partner bc then he’s able to practise his dialect. he’d have a korean-speaking s/o too, although he sometimes stumbles over his korean a teeny bit

would love a cute style definitely!!!

MARK

same age, probably. he would feel more comfortable in terms of affection and conversation i feel!

equal amount of who holds who, but loves when his s/o initiates and cuddles him first 

likes baggy clothes on you tbh, likes to match appearances and styles with you

wouldn’t mind an s/o of any race. he’s dedicated to learning your language if anything, the man likes to learn about new things

mark just wants someone fun to be around who returns his laughter and jokes, kinda like how johnny does

he’s suffered enough from johnny though (“ah, mark! the smell!”) and would probably like it if you defend him instead LOL (sometimes you poke fun tho)

he would also want his s/o to just reciprocate him in terms of laughter and happiness level. mark is always so bubbly that he wants someone to smile at him and laugh with him

XIAOJUN

would like an older s/o ngl, i feel like he would want to be guided as well

doesn’t care if you’re tall or short tbh

but would like an s/o who brings him out of his shell like the members do.

he wants to be able to laugh without trouble around his s/o and let loose. xiaojun sometimes gets annoyed, mostly feigned annoyance, so it would be nice for an s/o to fit in like the members: making fun of his angry face and rolling eyes and then having some light banter

he’s also gonna need an s/o who’s not afraid to pull him back whenever he says out of pocket things. they’re not necessarily harmful just extremely blunt at times that makes you cringe and you have to pull him back to tell him of his comments LOL

xiaojun would... not go into an r/s with a foreign partner i feel, but he will TRY if the conversation is not too awkward, save for like activities and such. like others in this post, he’ll make an effort if he’s committed to you, and only if you’re sure of dating him as well

xiaojun loves a cute style lawd!

HENDERY

same age, younger, older, tbh i don’t think hendery cares that much

he would want a shorter s/o though, i feel

wants a fun and playful s/o, someone who’s just so enjoyable to be around that he sometimes forgets himself and gets lost in the happiness you two give out

he does also want an s/o who can make him shy and basically challenge his personality, but not in a headbutt way where it’s your same two personalities against each other. it’s rather two variations of the same feeling like your playful aura against hendery’s playful aura, which would be honestly quite fun to watch and experience bc you’re just trying to one-up each other

and idk, because he’s talkative quite often, he feels like it would be nice to be the flustered, eyes-wide one for once

hendery in a foreign partner relationship... he would try, but i think he’d be a little intimidated at the languages that he has to have some time to warm up. he would commit and make the effort if he was willing to, though

oversized fits are his shit!!!! he also doesn’t mind seeing you explore with your appearance and style, esp in the goth or rebel kinda style 

RENJUN

same age or younger, wouldn’t mind if you were taller since he knows his height is not THAT high

renjun loves for you to hold him though

the cheeky lad wants a laid back s/o, who doesn’t take life so seriously as well and like hendery, would like it if his s/o was a bit goofy and playful

would also want an s/o who’s deep about the universe and stuff, kinda intelligent to debate alien life and what not, he wants to be able to talk to you about anything and keep the conversation going even if you’re talking about something simple and dumb like snacks

i also can’t exactly see renjun go for a foreign s/o, mainly because of the language barrier, but i can see him trying if he’s able to get help from mark hyung and if the situation allows for you to meet frequently

renjun would definitely like a cute style on his s/o, but also would like more flashy or out-of-the-box outfits. as long as you’re comfy then he’s fine

JENO

same age. he likes to be taken care of though, would maybe be a 60/40 split of you taking care vs him taking care of you respectively

i feel like jeno would like a shorter s/o!

cute s/o, maybe matching up to the personality of jaemin since he was his longest friend from before. enthusiastic while he takes the back seat and admires you

while jaemin loses his social battery over time, jeno wouldn’t mind if you were a literal menace like haechan bc he feels that would make the r/s really fun

see him preferring a korean-speaking person. kinda like doyoung but not quite, he’s more careful than serious (?) about his idol life, and he wouldn’t want to take the risk

HAECHAN

same age or older i feel. equal split of who’s the embracer in the relationship though 

wouldn’t mind a taller person, although he’d prefer if you were around the same height bc he doesn’t want to be teased by his members lol

i feel like haechan would rlly like y2k outfits on his s/o? a mix of baggy outfits as well as cute ones

his natural outgoing personality allows him to get together with a foreign person i feel, bc he’d suggest things that don’t need talking like bowling or an arcade y’know? he struggles a bit with native languages tho, bc he’s so used to speaking korean

btw please egg him on, he loves it when you do it and also do dumb things with him. he would want someone who doesn’t take life so seriously while also possessing the ability to think deeply i feel, but mostly someone who can keep smiling and strong even through hardships. kinda a happy-go-lucky personality

JAEMIN

younger, i feel. like johnny he has a lot of affection to give like he usually does to jisung…. jisung is grown up alr tho so :”(

loves giving the cuddles, big spoon, etc. he just wants you to feel loved no matter what size you are

he also would love tall people ngl! although sometimes he can’t decide between short and tall people

jaemin would appreciate an affectionate s/o who’s committed to him and also a person who’s just naturally shy i feel

they don’t necessarily need to return the energetic bursts of aegyo or stuff (he’d love it though) and also someone who just enjoys life and the small little things in general

would not mind dating a foreigner, would love to learn about your native language actually!

he likes cutesy appearances i reckon, a bit of oversized styles but overall likes the pastels

YANG YANG

same age or older, likes to be taken care of tbh

yang yang is also someone who doesn’t care if you’re short or tall, and likes you either way :)

does not mind a foreign person, plus he’s moved countries a little and could maybe find solace in the fact that his homes are sometimes not fixed, esp with how many languages he speaks as well

yang yang would want an s/o who lives up to his excitement in jokes and memes. he would feel a bit down if you happen to not understand a joke although he cant blame you, but he would want someone almost identical to him? 

create chaos together and then fall asleep together

can see him liking a cute style tbh, and also reaaaaally likes to match outfits with you in your own respective styles

SHOTARO

same age, def.

i think being in nct has made him a little shy as compared to before when he was in a dance crew, so he’d need someone to encourage him while also taking care of him!!

talking to a non japanese- or korean- speaking person might scare him, so he would settle just for that. shotaro wouldn’t mind in a sense if he knows the other person is committed, but the language barrier for the first few dates would be awkward

ooohhh likes it when people are confident definitely, comfortable in their own skin. shotaro is another person i feel would really be attracted to y2k fits

like i said earlier, shotaro just needs a little push, which would help with an outgoing s/o and someone who’s not afraid to try new things. he feeds off your confidence and uses that to boost his!

CHENLE

doesn’t mind an s/o who is the same age or a tad bit older, i’m not sure if i see him with a younger s/o

doesn’t care if you’re tall or short as long as you give him his damn hugs!!!! 

outgoing personality? check. he would literally befriend anyone, and wouldn’t mind a foreign s/o who doesn’t speak korean or chinese. with his limited english, he could probably make an outing fun by doing activities together and will learn your language!!

an s/o who can calm him down. chenle uses up his energy a lot and can get worn out and just wants someone to embrace at the end of the day. i wouldn’t say its similar to taeyong who’s sometimes tired from taking care of the members, but rather in a way where it’s a little playful and bubbly in your own little circle.

it’s a different kind of happy that chenle feels with you as opposed to the joy that the members bring him.

chenle also would want someone who’s sure of themselves, more so in personality rather than apperance. he likes all sizes and colours and styles, altho leans more toward the oversized sector

SUNGCHAN

sungchan is bit mischievous, so i feel like he naturally lean towards an s/o who can kinda be the “mother slash partner” of him: either the same age or younger, leaning more toward a same aged s/o

lawd this man is so tall. i think he’d want a shorter partner, sometimes a bit awkward with the affection but overall likes to give it. plus point: he likes to see you struggle wrap your body around his to get all of him in your cuddles

he wants to be able to relate to them and wouldn’t want awkwardness, so i don’t think he would go for a foreign person as of now

sungchan likes someone to have fun with him, ofc he’s aware that he can’t take away all their problems but he would want his s/o to feel relaxed and content around him with his goofy personality

sungchan likes a cutesy style, maybe, BUT i always see him being really drawn to y2k fits!!!

JISUNG

leaning more towards the same age (+/-1). i think a noona would make him shy and a younger s/o would just feel weird to him idk. 

this man is also very tall, so probs a shorter s/o,,,,, would not mind if you are tall though!! he just likes to have you in his arms instead of the other way round (so you can’t see his flushed face)

not sure if he’d commit to a r/s that is foreign, but he would try with the help of mark-hyung or something. the reason why he’d take it was because the members would help me, but if not, he wouldn’t take the risk with his idol life at stake.

jisung wants someone who’s self-assured as well, strong in mettle and who has a strong character that helps him build up his drive. seeing you in your element helps him achieve more and he appreciates that you are able to provide him with a source of motivation

jisung likes cute stuff, but he does like oversized fits!

[ririsann]

YOO BACK AGAIN HAHAHAHA WOAH WHEND I GET HERE WOAH HAHA VAN I ASK FOR A RAN X READER FLUFF WHERE THEY PLAY WITH HIS HAIR YEAHH YEAHH OR NOT U DONT HAVE TO THANKS BBY💋

「 𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬 」

playing with ran’s hair while hanging out.

⊳　 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠... haitani ran x gn!reader

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 - mentions of violence (it’s literally ran what do u expect 💀), cursing (a lot of it), rindou slander, suggestive (a little)

𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒 - the way i wanted to do this anyway... we really are soulmates 😍😍 anyways ran > rindou anyday 

𝐑𝐀𝐍 tends to have a lot of time on his hands. he didn’t attend school anymore, though he probably didn’t need to in the first place. who needs a degree when you can murder people and hire people to rob banks?

with all of this free time, he usually spent it with his loving s/o. 

you were honestly drawn to him after seeing him beat the living shit out of some kids that wanted to beat the kings of roppongi or something. it was quite the sight, but ran just looked. really fucking badass. 

of course rindou saw you first, but you weren’t interested in his bald ass head. who told him that was a good idea in the first place anyway. ugly bitch!

you like to bring this up, and how ran should convince his brother to change his hair because he looked like absolute shit. your boyfriend would laugh and say “do it yourself”, though if you did you would get your neck snapped.

“say, if i--”

“i don’t think i like where this is going, doll.” you slumped into the couch that you were both on, doing your own individual things. he was... doing whatever haitani ran does and you were making some plans for whatever maniacal deed ran wanted to do in the very near future.

“are you sure? we’ve never done it before so--”

“we’re definitely not doing it.” 

“i just wanted to play with your hair,” you mumbled. one half of you wanted him to hear it, but the other hated the idea of him knowing.

“hm? what was that?”

you shake your head while writing the words electric chair? (affordable???) in the notebook in your lap. he glances over to see what you wrote, nodding his head like he’s been waiting for you to write that down. yeah, as he should.

～　灰谷蘭 　～

“i’m tired.”

“well try getting your face out of my fucking thighs and i’ll let you sleep on them.” your boyfriend immediately sat up and waited for your next request. goddamn simp.

you patted your lap, now giving him the permission to lay in it. for some really strange reason, he liked to poke your stomach, specifically your bellybutton. and he did this a lot so you kinda just became immune to it, except for the fact that it would get annoying after a little while.

“i’m gonna push you off if you don’t stop.” you can feel him frown, disappointed that he couldn’t annoy you or else he’d be evicted from his very comfy headrest. “you said you were tired, so go sleep.”

he groans, flipping his body so he faced upwards. he closes is eyes and soon passes out due to pure exhaustion. the life of haitani ran, everybody.

you noticed that his braids her extra tight today, and sleeping with them in would definitely hurt his scalp when he tries to take them out when he wakes up.

“jeez, why’d you do them so tight today? just ask me next time...” you whisper to yourself, afraid of waking up the man in your lap.

as you undid his hair, you realized that his hair was unusually soft today. did he do something to it? and it was really nice to the touch. he didn’t feel sticky, so he probably didn’t sweat while doing whatever the hell he was doing at 3 am in roppongi.

as you undid his first braid, you massaged his scalp. he let out a hum. so he liked it, did he? you stopped massaging him and undid his other braid, releasing the rest of the tension on his scalp.

“spoiled brat...” you couldn’t help but laugh. this guy, who basically made a living and more off of beating people up, getting home and acting like a small child. who knew that haitani ran, the elder haitani brother, would act like this behind closed doors?

“you’re lucky i love you, ya know.”

[love-amihan]

| ʜᴏᴍᴇ | ᴊᴊᴋ | ᴀᴏᴛ | ʜǫ | ꜰɪʟᴏ | ᴛᴀɢʟɪsᴛs | ᴍɪᴍɪ |

AS YOUR CLASSMATES // TOKYO JUJUTSU HIGH STUDENTS

amihan's note: here's how i imagine them as the type of classmate based by my friends' chaotic energy. i don't make the rules, they radiate this energy big time, happy reading!

additional note: thank you to the person who reminded me of hakari's academic points, i owe you one 😁💛

-itadori yuji

deadass copies your homework the same day of passing

"oh we had homework?! can i copy yours" cue his puppy dog eyes

half of the time listening to the lecture, half of the time just doodles in his notebook

if you're his seatmate, oh my good luck

he will try and converse with you every single time during discussion

got called by the teacher, finally pipes down

though, gotta say he will be the type to excel in quizzes!

unexpectedly did well and one of the highest score in class

overall, you like him but hate him at the same time

-fushiguro megumi

oh boy, this guy straight up sleeps at the back of the class

will make you sit in front him so that the teacher won't notice him

[based on true event] came prepared, opens notebook, pen in one hand his head leaning on his other hand looking like he's writing down notes but in reality he's deep asleep

he's just tired, let him be

if you're paired with him, he def cooperates

the goat of groupworks

overall realiable classmate, he's just sleepy

-nobara kugisaki

always comes in class looking pretty!

you forgot your lash curler? she have one. oh you also need mascara? no worries she got you.

will gladly apply light makeup for you

pretty handwriting!!!

she listens attentively during discussion

don't start a conversation with her cause she will not stop once you do

the type to lend you her notes

overall, a sweetheart. love you kugisaki 🥺💛

-zenin maki

she's definitely a braid expert

during break time, you will always see her braiding someone's hair for them

active participation during discussion

top student

always excel at everything

also, always part of the honors list

the one who the teacher's call whenever no one answers

will willingly teach you the lesson you have a hard time understanding

oH the student who lets you copy during quizzes (kids u gotta study for quizzes, don't just copy others... but if you didn't, just ask them)

overall, would make a great study partner and most likely the source of many students

-panda

that one loud ass kid

always yelling during break time

but he's the fun one, will initiate playing a game if no one was doing anything

if he's close with the teacher, he will not answer the question asked seriously instead coming up with something witty and unrelated

ends up getting a warning, but after class the teacher is not really mad at him

vibes with so many teachers

will always make the class laugh with his wittiness

overall, the class clown

-okkotsu yuta

you know the good looking quiet kid that everyone secretly has a crush on? yeah that's him

surprisingly good at drawing, got his time to shine when arts were presented in front

i just know that this boy always carry a handkerchief with him

he always hold it in his hand fiddling with it

sits in front of the class

always being persuaded by the teacher who organizes pageant for the school but always says no bcs he's shy

fun to tease and tell jokes to

when you talk to him he's always laughing

"i didn't even say anything funny" he just smiles fidgeting with his handkerchief, say sorry and tell him a joke now!

overall, a quiet and average student

-inumaki toge

now this bitch, a menace

definitely your friend

"toge can you get my glasses?" this mf will purposely get it by the lens

you have your hair up in a bun? he never fails to miss a moment smacking the top of it and will have the guts to make buzzing noises while he's at it

doesn't take down notes saying he can just photocopy yours

also copies your homework, every goddamn time

but gotta admit that he effortlessly excels in one subject where you greatly struggle with, so it's kinda a win-win ig

worst type of tutor, he sometimes forget to tell you important details

also, the type to get reviewers from you

overall, i love you toge but i wanna strangle you sometimes

-hakari kinji

you don't see him often

teachers remember him but not in a good way

if ever he's in class, he sits at the back corner

doesn't participate much

if you're grouped with him he just agrees with whatever the group suggests, once in a while giving his own suggestion

his bag you ask? none.

only has a pen

will ask his seatmate for a piece of paper if ever he feels like taking notes

don't really have anything to say about him other than he's barely passing

will probably end up repeating a year due to his tardiness

overall, though he's mia once in a while he will still make a great classmate have group works with since he easily cooperates

copyright © 2021 by love-amihan all rights reserved. do not repost in other platforms. reblogs are welcome and highly appreciated! <33

[spicytrashthe1st]

Obey me boys reaction to a demon hunter Mc

Lucifer

When he first finds out he's like "pft, how can this weak bitch like u take me down?", and then he sees u get into a figth w/ one of ur classmate's. Lucifer now finds u a bit intimidating, but only a bit, he totally hasnt squeaked when uv entered his peripherals like a phantom.

Mammon

Guess whoes on bodyguard duty? Yeah buddy, its u!

But for realies. Mam's is confused as to why he's been set up to be ur protector when ur clearly capable. Kinda feels usless in a way bc of this, not that he'd admit it. One time u catch him "sulking" n ask whats up. Once uv wrangled it outta him u have to laugh, but when u see his sad ol' Mammon eyes u become somber n tell him "of course i need u, who else is gonna watch my back?". Are u sure Mam's is a demon cause he's shining like the fuckin sun right now. Will he brag to everyone about this? U bet ur goddamn ass he will.

Leviathan

He thinks its cool. Keeps comparing u to anime characters which gets annoying at times, but he's so cute when he gets excited so u let it pass.

Considering he's a Lord n everything i dont think he'd get bullied, however, no one hurts ur otaku waifu, no one.

Satan

Gee 20 question sure is a longer game then u remember.

Might ask u to fight him for science. Might do some other things for science to 😉

Asmodeus

Will make euphemisms about ur weapons.

Loves to be carried around by u, makes him feel like a princess.

No one touches ur beloved w/ his say so lest they lose they're hands. Not gonna lie, he finds it extremely attractive when u go all protective n shit.

Beelzebub

Loves to spare/workout w/ u, its rare to find someone on his level. U make him a smoothy bowl one time n he loves it so much that he has to hug u.

Belphegor

Thinks its a joke. The brat is arrogant up until the point where he tries to kill u, yes u heard me right, tries. U hug him bc hugs r great, then he goes to squeeze u n like nothin is happening. He tries again, still nothin. He pulls away n has a tantrum about it before goin full demon. U hulk smash "puny demon" his ass. Once hes got the fight outta his system u thow him over ur shoulder n take him downstairs to see the fam.

Sometimes when ur bored u hover over him in his sleep to see him startel when he opens his eyes. Never gets old.

Diavolo

Pick him up please. The man likes to be held.

Also likes to spar, altho its more like play fightin most days.

One time at a social event u see that he's in detress as the nobles corner him so u just push past them w/ zero fuck, pick him up, and then take him to get sundaes.

Another time ur just staring off into space when someone makes an assassination attempt. U wait for anyone to spot them but apparently demon cant see 'em. So u sigh n kick their ass, rippin off the amulet they were wearin to reveal it was old man rivers the entire time, good job Scooby-doo.

Barbatos

Loves to have u around when doin chores. "Would u be a dear and hold this?" Is a common occurrence, does he say it about himself sometimes just so ull hold him? Yes.

Sometimes he catches a brief glance at u while ur sparing w/ the young lord. Hes looking respectfully of course.

Simeon

Thinks its cute

Has to drag u away from Luke most of the time bc the kid keeps askin when ur gonna kill the demon lords in a not so subtle way.

Solomon

"Is that so?"

Uv peaked his curiosity, run.

[foreverpearl]

the umbrella academy season 1: live reactions

ok i'm starting this show for five

i'm real curious abt ben

what's... what's up with allison & luther

OMG five is 13?!?!?!?

JSJDHDHDH technically he's 50 and somehow it's easier for me to crush on that than to accept that he's physically a 13y boy LMAO

OMG KLAUS IS SIMON FROM THE MORTAL INSTRUMENTS

i'm looking forward to the five-vanya meme lol

timeskip, i'm in the middle of ep5 now and this whole family is so deranged and dysfunctional... i'm so sorry to everyone in it

omfg i knew leonard was a yandere psycho ass mf

i needa know what happened to ben

poor dave. poor klaus.

also i'm puking my guts out at luther and allison... my dudes you're siblings

i. i hate it.

i hate the day that wasn't

they were gettin closure n shit :(

five just kinda undid all of their character development...

OMFG HAROLD JENKINS

hazel and agnes... please they need to be happy

fuck if cha cha fucking kills him...

(around ep7) y'know what i bet it's vanya who ends the world

protect harold jenkins bc he's the one who enables her powers

their father knew abt it or sumn and that's why he's suppressing her

also he tries to stop five from time travelling lest he discovers the apocalypse/vanya's powers

anyway

did klaus just fucking die <3

ok he just undied <3 but wtf mr hargreeves

well that's one mystery solved ig. wtf tho

omfg vanya just broke her mf neck

hazel best boi himbo <3 how very kind we love this assassin

did allison just fucking die

i hate this show

who's next who are they killing off next huh >:(

omfg. ok vanya u murderer. literally all of humanity. oooooh i'm so angsty and depressed i'm gonna kill 7 billion people (plus a lot of flora & fauna) because of my childhood

her coping mechanism is... genocide???

after-show thoughts!!

is ben alive again? love him, would love to see him soon

so proud seeing him all octopussy in that theater!! lov u babey!!

i'm so happy for hazel and agnes <3

fuck this whole family bro

i understood luther and felt sorry for him at first but i don't think he's been a good leader at all, like... ever lmao... i think he's just number 1 bc he's loyal

five is cute <3 also diego is hot but i'm sure he stinks ass, he never washes that outfit of his

allison's i heard a rumor that you loved me... oh my god.... aaagghhhh... :'(

BEN SHOW ME BEN

klaus and dave D':

klaus and dave............

this whole family sucks not a single happy moment. dysfunctional asf

i'm gonna watch s2 asap i needa know what happens!! also omg r they all kids now

also also fuck vanya again, not to invalidate her but dude leave the rest of humanity out of ur family drama. literally causing dinosaurs 2.0 goddamn

btw what time period is this... like they don't have phones or sumn i think? love the aesthetic

what's diego's power again? is it literally just knives

bonus: hotness tier (also kindness is hot)

five, diego, mommy grace <3

allison, patch, handler (she sucks but she's so attractive so no she doesn't)

klaus, hazel

agnes <3, luther

vanya, pogo (??!!)

cha cha

[maddiewritesstucky]

Ok ok ok so this isn't exactly jock 'verse related but it also kinda is & I need 2 tell u or I might explode 🤣🤣🤣 its legit a perfect fanfic trope but irl

So, my university has fraternities like a lot do BUT there's this dude (he's in a few classes with me) & this dude is just a Frat. Bro. thru & thru. He loves his frat & would likely die 4 those boys. Idk literally anything else about him besides the fact that he knocked a girl up his freshman yr & now, just, brings his kid everywhere. 2 zoom meetings & 2 in person classes (according 2 my friend) when we had them 😅

but wait

it gets Better.

I learned today when we were sharing about ourselves that his "frat name" (idfk how that shit works😂) has transitioned from a pun on his last name 2 just- D A D D Y

All the other dudes just. call. him. daddy.

YES HE IS A LITERAL FATHER BUT Y?

y are so many frats so straight that they loop back 2 being gay?

NONNIE I AM BESIDE MYSELF 🤣

Literally everything about this is fucking incredible!?

Being one of those dudes who probably ends up getting matching ‘bros in, bros out’ tattoos with The Boys™️ by the end of college? Impeccable 👌

This very same bonafide FratBro rocking around with a baby? DELICIOUS 👏

You already had me, Nonnie, but then you go and heap on the fact that there’s a group of young adult men casually walking around referring to this man as DADDY?!?

T R A N S C E N D E N T 🙌

This might be the best story I’ve ever heard to be honest. And you know what, as for the relevance to JockVerse? I think this fits right in, and I’m gonna go ahead and tag my girl @rainbowsandcoconut here because you’ve probably just made her day by prompting me to write this, Nonnie.

Consider, if you will:

Bucky having to take care of his 6 month old niece on short notice, on a day when he can’t afford to skip class. It’s a short day for him, only one morning lecture then a team meeting, so he just...brings her with him

In a baby carrier, strapped to his front, so he can still carry his backpack and have his hands free

He doesn’t make a big deal about it, and no one in his lecture takes issue because she sleeps pretty much the entire way through

But when he walks into the meeting and his teammates clock his situation?...

“I knew this day would come! I knew Barnes was gonna knock someone up!”

“How could you not tell us you had a spawn? I thought we were friends, man!”

“Jesus, she looks exactly like you.”

(That one’s accurate - this kid is all Barnes, dark hair and slate eyes and perfect little Cupid’s bow)

“Nah, this is our new linebacker,” Bucky lifts her out of the carrier and grabs her blanket out of his backpack, spreading it on the floor to let her stretch her little body out

She’s a pretty chill little person so she’s unconcerned by the bunch of jacked up football players all kinda crowding around, she just looks at them all in turn, babbling a quiet assessment of the situation to herself

Steve and Coach Fury walk in at the same time, and they both do a double take - Fury, because “why is there a goddamn baby on my floor?” and Steve, because Bucky’s hands - those grabbing, pinning, shoving, spanking hands that he’s so intimately familiar with - are now very gently slipping a tiny sock onto a tiny foot

“Barnes is playing Daddy!” Clint oh so joyously informs them, and Fury just kinda shakes his head and mumbles something about how he’s ‘been waiting for some bullshit like this’

Bucky explains his situation, and Steve doesn’t say much of anything, but his face is doing a whole lot of something. There’s no time to examine that though, because Fury is getting the meeting underway

It all goes pretty much as normal, except this time when Bucky’s running his mouth about how they’re gonna fucking obliterate the opposing team at the upcoming playoff, he’s doing it with a baby in his arms and his fingertips drawing soft, absent patterns over her belly; occasionally cupping his hands over her teeny ears when his verbiage gets a little more colourful

Steve does not know what to do with the duality of this

Since when does Bucky know how to do shit like one-handed prep a bottle of formula? Where the fuck is this soft-ass smile coming from? Why is Steve’s gut doing weird swoopy flippy stuff every time Bucky quietly coos “oh, you think so?” to his niece’s incomprehensible little sounds?

Crisis 2.0 comes when Clint insists on referring to Bucky as ‘Daddy’ for the entirety of the meeting, even after Bucky points out the inaccuracy, because in Clint-logic it would apparently be “way too fuckin’ weird to call you ‘uncle’”

This is not a kink Steve has ever considered before, it’s certainly not one he and Bucky have played around with, but fuck if his body isn’t doing some Thangs at hearing that title used on Bucky. His throat gets inexplicably dry every time, and a few strangled sounds make their way out when he’s not quick enough to catch them

He knows it’s not lost on Bucky, he can feel Bucky looking at him every time Clint drops the D word, but Steve can’t bring himself to return that stare

It’s a miracle Steve survives this maelstrom at all, to be honest. It’s making him think entirely too hard, and he doesn’t want to think when it comes to Bucky. The whole point of them is that they don’t have to think

He disappears pretty quick after the meeting, and it doesn’t go unnoticed, but Bucky decides to be gracious this time and let it slide...

...At least, he does until the next time he’s putting Steve through the headboard, when he just can’t help but tuck his smug grin right up against Steve’s ear, and purr “...gonna come for your Daddy?”

[batarangsoundsdumb]

yet another ask dump yeehaw!

do you ever think that jay's mother was one of those bitch who believes in horoscope and tarots and things like that and so he believes in these things too, or it is just me projecting?

sheila haywood took one look at jason's birthchart said 'nah this won't do' and left.

Wait, but what happens when the justice league does find out that Bruce and John fucked? Lmao it sounds like it would be hilarious, really, I don’t want a justice league that doesn’t make fun of Bruce for like his entire life.

barry runs out of the meeting immediately and comes back with an entire sti testing kit. diana fully seriously wants bruce to get tested while bruce is sitting there like 'come on guys, you're being ridiculous, i already checked twice'

john is standing in the corner clearly offended while bruce is just like 'don't even say anything, constantine, you fucked a shark'

tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.

on the one hand, good for him, on the other hand, bro, how do you still have a secret identity when your superhero name is just your last name,,,,

Your fic on ao3 was GOLD PLEASE CONTINUE I loved Dinah's cameo btw ( @purple-vixen

thanks so much! i already continued but this ask is like 10 years old because i'm a notorious procrastinator (also yes! i love dinah so much aahhhhhhhhhhhh)

I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.

bruce internally: holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit bruce externally: get out of my city, alien

AHHH ur multimedia fic is the only thing that brings me happiness anymore continue it forever pls

uhh thanks, but can't continue it forever because my attention span is that of a toddler on crack on a good day and i can't function without at least 10 things going on at the same time and music in the background

Oi, so I'm getting into dc and watching batman the animated series, and they use fruitcake a lot. Which I thought was very funny and wanted to share w you - Denilla

wait like fruitcake (food) or fruitcake (derogatory) ?

young justice 🤝 teen titans slut shaming batman

tim drake and dick grayson to their respective teams 'you guys stop it, that's my dad'

Happyhoganon: If an eighty year old Batman had fought crime in Gotham City for decades and the only threats to him and the city lately are a wheel chair bounded Penguin, your usual purse snatchers and a few con artists popping up every now and then, how well could the Dark Knight do in maintaining the peace in Gotham despite him being just somewhat fit to do that as an elderly man (which says A LOT given how old he is)

uhh he'll probably do what my grandpa does and that is ruthlessly prank them until they die of shame.

in the death in the family interactive movie there's an ending where Jason is tasked with raising Damian and he decides he's gonna raise Damian to take down the waynes and al ghuls which uh maybe isn't great BUT the idea of Jason raising Damian... PRICELESS. CHAOTIC. I just need more people to know about this :)

yes i saw that wow holy shit but jason would accidentally drop damian on his head one (1) hour in and jason just yeets him into the lazarus pit.

Headcanon: The Penguin has a really hard time fighting any of the Robins because of his avian obsession means there's always a small part of his mind that's like "Birb. Child. Protect" ( @subspacecadet )

as soon as dick becomes nightwing the penguin is like 'you know what, fuck this dude' and shoots at him.

Y'all talking about King Shark dating Constantine, let's not forget about John literally hooking up with Satan

listen there's a clear difference between monsterfucker and satanfucker in that king shark is literally a shark and satan still looks like a normal dude

Does everyone in Gotham think Batman is a teen dad?

everyone in gotham thinks batman has been around since gotham was founded, but they do think that bruce wayne is actually a teen father and dick grayson's biological dad.

why. why would you do that fancast when you know it will only hurt people

what? i loved my fancast it was really well done. i did it with good representation in mind and i really managed that with alfred pennyworth being ✨italian✨

Seeing james charles a jason gave me psychic damage how dare you i need to wash my eyes

well that's a you problem isn't it?

do you think dick grayson thirst tweets about nightwing just to annoy his family/cause problems on purpose in general?

he thinks nightwing is hot, next question.

holy jiminy cricket batman, its as cold as the good lords ass crack in here!!

i- what? this is why i don't fuck with english expressions it's way too goddamn weird

Brooooooo, your teen dad!Bruce au is soooo good. I've got brainrot.

Honestly if you ever write anymore, I'd read that shit twice. Sign me the fuck up. Good stuff, Good Stuff.

uh yeah i'm thinking about writing a fic, but i have exams coming up and i don't wanna fail because that would suck. but after i'll certainly be writing more tho

your teen dad AU is so great! bruce acting like a big brother for all of like a week before he's telling everyone about his son. what if in the AU dick meets the JL because they need to rescue him? maybe he's in trouble/kidnapped at a gala and bruce starts calling for JL. clark finds him and has to fly with dick to bring him home - that's how dick and clark meet and superman becomes dick's fave hero. he goes around the manor thinking he can fly with a red blanket draped around him like a cape.

actually- if you want a young dad! bruce fic with like that kinda stuff(just with damian) go check uhh- in for a penny by cdelphiki. it's really good and bruce is like 24/25-ish. (and dick's there!!!)

This account has solely convinced me that Tim is a trash goblin ( @hamilcat-and-magic-turtle )

because he is. that boy has slept in dumpsters on multiple occasions even if he is the son of a billionaire.

Okay but when you said victory dance I did think of the whole justice league defeating the big bad and then they all start flossing

well that's exactly what hal jordan does and that's why batman uses a gun now. no but the victory dance in my opinion is like the 'we're all in this together' dance from high school musical.

The horrors in Invincible s1 was nothing compared to the comics, I cant wait for s2

oh well okay, i mean i personally react to horror and violence by laughing awkwardly so i can't wait to be called a monster for accidentally laughing at a mass murder.

I'm currently watching Batman: The Brave and The Bold and- Bruce is just talking about Oliver like he's an old love (@nightwings-kid)

okay im going to watch that lmao that's totally and completely in character for him tho.

The invincible comic is like super gratuitous with its violence so much so I'm shocked the show was able to adapt it in a faithful way! Anyway had the show been live action it absolutely wouldn't have the same impact as it does as an animated show and I'm so glad so many people agree with me on that

also because a live action casting would've been like uhh amanda stenberg for amber, the dude- the guy from the supernatural but with a mustache for omni-man, and scarlet johanssen for debbie grayson

Debbie grayson is a milf, yes. You're welcome for the invincible propoganda, now you can questions your life. Bruce def seems like the perfect father next to Omni-man. Like they really took a rip off justice league and I was like well, now I'm attached even tho I was like hah I know who they're supposed to be. And then bam- death gore death gore gore gore sad Mark grayson just had to have daddy issues. Why does every character have daddy issues. I'm sick of the attacks

because daddy issues make a person arguably funnier, that's why i'm not even remotely funny (haha good dad flex). i liked that it was dark contextually, but not in the colouring, bc i hate when it's like 'uh yeah graphic murder and now a shot so dark you have to sit in a dark room and squint at the screen to faintly see the characters. (like dcau ugh)

About the Wayne insurance, for a moment I thought you would put the video with moans over the waves.

i mean- i could've done that, but rick rolling seemed more family friendly.

Its the first time in forever that im surpise rickrolled, i usually expect it. Congratulations (i really should know better this is tumblr)

i get rickrolled so often but i actually like the song so i dont really give a fuck

Actually, my information about Damian and John's kids is outdated because it was revealed that the old men telling the kids stories about the Supersons were actually Jon and Damian the whole time. I was blinded by my thirst for Grandpa!Bruce Wayne but I was wrong... I liked my version better, tbh (@artemisa97)

fair enough. but i'd honestly like to see damian and jon getting together, just because it's a really fun dynamic and their friendship was really cute when they were kids. (also idk maybe it would be nice to have one (1) main batfam/superfam character that's not cishet)

How am i JUST finding your blog skdskfkd you're so fucking funny and ur takes are hot

i thought u were calling me hot :( but youre not :( crime detected (but lmao thanks)

So I have depression and I swear that your memes are one of the few things that have made me laugh so thank you 💛🥺 (@katekanebadass)

aw you're welcome, and i hope you're doing okay!

The metropolis memes are so funny, I love them 💀😌

i think metropolis is also so fucking funny it deserves more attention imagine having your entire police force being upstaged by an alien from kansas and his kids

as an american i feel your complete lack of knowledge of us geography is just so sexy (platonic) ❤️

thanks so much (i also don't know any other geography, i'm not kidding, like you can tell me you're from hungary and it will just blank, there will be nothing that comes to mind)

In the DC universe they don't say "Can't have shit in Detroit" they say "Can't have shit in Gotham"

this just reminds me of that guy whose porch got stolen like the steps to his door, and i'm thinking of people living in gotham and waking up without a front door and going "can't have shit in gotham"

honestly all i know about chicago is the bean, so. what would gotham's famous sculpture be?

gigantic gargoyle statue in front of one of the police precincts because a villain thought it was a smart way to keep the police inside, but it's too heavy to move.

why tf do people go on about how batman "works alone" or how he's the "lone wolf" when he like 38290202 members in his family

bc people think it's cool that a grown man in his 30s has no friends or family instead of calling it what it is (sad)

Bruce is gotham's sugar daddy

why would say something so controversial yet so brave.

my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context

dick: gerard way are you in position, gerard way are you in position

tim: for the last fucking time, my codename is 'totally not count olaf' this week, abbafan 3000

dick: shut up my codename isn't 'abbafan 3000'

dick: it's 'abbafan number 1' and you know it

I have a feeling Tim drake is ur favourite batfamily member but okay u don't have favs if u say so ok

i mean he is, i won't deny it. but i love each and every one of the batfam just the same, i just have a weak spot for short dumbass nerds, because i'm a short dumbass nerd.

Omg i fuckin love boy meets world too fam shsjkfk

bro boy meets world was the shit!!! it was just fire and awesome and so fucking great like bro. it was so good im not even going to be accepting criticism

you know I find the whole "joker completes batman" thing a bit disgusting considering the horrendous stuff the batfamily went through because of the joker and let's not get started on the "joker has a point" thing like yeah he's this cool complex villain but he's absolutely batshit crazy

like yes! i get what you mean the joker just fucking sucks man he doesn't do shit for batman's character or the batfam he's literally just annoying as fuck. like the joker has a point' shit is so stupid. i will accept 'magneto was right' because he fucking was and i think he didn't do anything wrong, but joker? he's just like that. he's not even cool and complex he's just a weirdo with a bleach kink at this point.

ALSO YOUR RACISM POST- SO TRUE BESTIE

thanks bestie, i'm glad you agree.

in today's essay of why I think cass should become batman- I was thinking Tim would probably be the most efficient batman in many ways but I also think he wouldn't want to be batman tbh none of the batfamily members would want to be batman because they're trying to outgrow him but cass is the one who wants to represent the symbol that is batman

absofuckinglutely i will say it again and again that cass represents the batsymbol more than anyone in the batfam, in batgirl (2000) she literally didn't care about anything else than bruce's oath to not kill, she thought the batsymbol was more important than anything in gotham. she's just an excellent character because her motivation to not kill is not 'i'm scared i can't come back from it' or 'well my dad says no murder so i'll go along with it' but that she's killed somebody as a young child and she never wants to kill a human ever again and that's so fucking beautiful for a new batman like yes.

need more cass, duke and tim inclusion in gothamite memes

yes yes, a tall order of cass, duke and tim coming up in 1-14 business days

oldest to youngest batfam members cus I'm confused as shit

okay order of being taken in: dick, jason, tim, cass, damian, duke order of age: alfred, bruce, dick, cass, jason, tim, duke, damian (though cass and jason are around the same age general consensus is that cass is a little older)

I'm so confused Steph is a redhead?? like how was it that hard to get this right? the source material is literally right there and free

cw is jared, 19

do you receive anon hate? if so, how do you deal with it

uh no, i'm not remotely popular enough to get anon hate and i also don't say a lot of things that would attract anon hate, but i do send anon hate to @the-real-peter-parker because he forgot about the specialists from winx club

Wait how many languages do you speak??

uhh- 5 if you include latin, but that's a dead language and i'm really bad at it. but english, my native language, german, and french also, tho german and french not fluently.

You can mix aguaepanela with aguardiente 😈 and is tasty

okay but now i'm curious if the liquor deserves the 😈 emoji or if that's a you problem. but i googled it and it looks like something you'd take one sip of and then not remember the rest of your evening.