#lighthearted & cute y'all

[the-haven-keepers-collective]

Sometimes being a canon-divergent fictive is "I have seen endless years and no one knows. I hide what and who I am even to myself. I grasp for what I'm missing in silence and absolutely no one realizes because it was somehow missed when my story was written. Even the supposed omniscience of the viewer is blind to my secrets."

And then sometimes it's

"I need to find a way to gently tell our friend that if they misgender me because I don't use the pronouns I do in source, I'll bite them." /Silly

- Xiao (they/them, hence my threat to bite) with Neuvillette (He/she. Technically not canon either but at least the canon pronouns aren't WRONG lol.)

[peachpety]

** FIC CLAIM**

Playing for Keeps, by peachpety

H/D Career Fair 2023 || G || 6.6k || A lighthearted get-together fic feat. Owl Postmaster Draco Malfoy, Man of Leisure Harry Potter & OoUSs*

When a delay in parcel delivery brings Harry Potter face-to-face with Draco Malfoy six years after Hogwarts, Harry’s convinced the mercurial postmaster is up to something. Or the one where Harry Potter loses his marbles and gains a boyfriend.

written for @hd-fan-fair Career Fair 2023 for @drwhoisginnyholmes. big love, as always to my beta & cheerleader @mystickitten42. i adore you. special shout out to the fest mods, @phoenix-acid & sassy_cissa for allowing me time to finish. i'm deilghted to finally have a fic in the fest!

*Owls of Unusual Size

READ ON AO3

[fluffs-n-stuffs]

Pokémon said bisexual rights 🫵✨✨✨

[hwanghyunjinenthusiast]

Technical Difficulties | lsk x reader

Seokmin's computer breaking shouldn't make him as happy as it does, but who can blame him when his favorite IT person always comes to the rescue?

Rating: M (18+) | WC: ~1.1k

Warnings: suggestive, implied size kink, implied semipublic sex, seokmin thinks ur an angel, i don't know anything about computers

Reader Notes: hands are smaller than seokmin's

Seokmin sits back in his chair and beams at the blue computer screen in front of him. It’s covered in error messages and lines of code he doesn’t understand, and for once, he’s pretty sure it’s not his fault. It also means he’ll get to see his favorite person in the office: you.

You work in IT and you’re usually the one they send to help him because the others tend to lose their patience. He asks a lot of questions and can sometimes forget about respecting personal space, but you never get angry with him. You explain what you’re doing as you do it, and you always have an answer for his questions. If you don’t, you look it up later and email him. His computer has been breaking less and less because of your tips, and he’s even excited to come into work just on the off chance he’ll see you.

Today must be his lucky day, because you’re already knocking on his door.

“Come in!” He calls out, a smile obvious in his voice and unmistakable on his face. You push the door open and poke in your head, greeting him with a grin of your own as you enter his office and take the chair he gives up for you.

You look beautiful with your bright eyes and compact case of tools, and your ability to multitask is always impressive to him, your fingers typing away at the laptop you plugged into his computer even as you keep up an engaging conversation with him.

Seokmin loves to watch you work, and his eyes are especially drawn to your hands. He thinks a lot about them; everything he’s seen them do, and everything he’d like to see them do. He thinks about how much longer his fingers are than yours, and how if he bent you over his desk and put his hands on top of them, they would be completely covered.

He doesn’t think about you like this on purpose, per se, but he also doesn’t exactly try to push the thoughts from his mind when they appear. They’re like a little treat he gets to have throughout the day, a wonderful break from the monotony of office work, and if they also happen to make his crush on you even stronger, he’s not going to complain.

“Hm, I think I’ll have to get into the tower itself. Can I take this back to my office? I have a spare you can use in the meantime.”

Your voice makes him jump, and Seokmin realizes with a guilty heart that he was thinking these thoughts with you present. He’s used to indulging in them alone and behind a closed door (not like that (okay once)), but he usually at least makes an attempt to keep his mind out of the gutter when you’re around. Partly because his poker face is nonexistent, mostly because he already gets a little bit turned on when your attention is devoted to him.

The most he can manage in his current state is a nod. He’s positive his expression betrays everything, and if his worst fears have come true, his dick might even be pressing against his slacks.

“Can you show me to the supply closet on this floor? I want to take the computer on a cart so I don’t damage anything further.”

Seokmin hums in affirmation and turns on his heel, snagging his suit jacket off the hanger to hold in front of his hips just in case. There’s a closet just down the hall, but he’s pretty sure it’s not big enough to hold a cart. He’ll have to take you to the one by the stairwell; if he’s remembering correctly, there’s something roll-y and large in there - he’d banged his hip on it last week looking for a staple remover.

It’s a bit more out of the way, and Seokmin can’t stop his heart from racing as he leads you down the hall. He’s not sure why, but he’s feeling more and more nervous the closer he gets to the closet, like there’s something waiting for him there.

The door comes into view and he jerks it open for you, the resistance of disuse making him pull harder than he expected would be required. You enter first, your hand roving over the wall as you look for the lightswitch. Seokmin knows where it is, but from experience, he also knows it doesn’t work. He flicks it up and down a few times, just to be sure, and you must register what the sound means because you heave a sigh and get out your phone flashlight.

The cart appears immediately, the bruise on Seokmin’s hip throbbing angrily as he glares at the offending piece of office equipment.

“Perfect,” You breathe, placing your phone face down on the surface so the small room is illuminated in icy white light. “Now, let’s discuss why your crush on me is such a poorly kept secret. You know your assistant, Chan, told me about it?”

Seokmin’s heart jumps out of his rib cage into his throat, sirens sounding in his ears as he processes your words. He thinks about trying to laugh it off, but he knows his face will look too pained. There’s no point in denying it either, not when Chan told you in such clear terms. He has no choice but to admit it, apologize, and hope you won’t report him to HR.

“I’m really sorry, I guess I’m not exactly good at hiding it. I don’t tell people, but they might be able to figure it out on their own,” he sounds so terribly guilt-ridden, it’s a miracle he’s not already on his knees.

His mind flashes back to when his computer last crashed. He’d flown out of his office in search of gum and words of affirmation, and Chan had supplied him with both. Seokmin supposes he should have thought more about why Chan knew exactly what kind of affirmation he needed.

“Seokmin, I’m not upset with you, I just wish I’d known. We have a lot of lost time to make up for.”

“Lost time? What do you mean?”

“I mean, I like you back. And there’s a lot we could get up to in this very hidden, very untouched supply closet.”

You raise a brow, your eyes darting over to the empty workbench on the side wall. It’s the perfect surface for many things, things like kissing you and maybe getting his hands on your soft skin and perhaps sliding his fingers between your plush thighs and, if he’s really lucky, possibly feeling your perfect walls wrapped around him.

Seokmin has a feeling he’s going to be experiencing many more technical difficulties in the future.

AN: posted first on my patreon! written for one of my patrons as a wooahae tier benefit 💖

[gracefuldisasters]

Y'all Brothership is so cute and lighthearted (so far) and it's an adorable addition to the M+L series

Apparently I can only draw characters who are Tired™, but that point still stands

[causticsunshine]

okay moving on !

[lxxiezz]

Solace in the fields

Shadow the hedgehog x fem!mobian!reader Reader is a fem!mobian lynx! (My cute lil idea) Not proofread, sorry y'all

It was a quiet evening in your home, you peacefully lounged on your living room couch, having some soft background music playing as you read a novel you found randomly in your bookshelf earlier, your partner, Shadow was away on a mission that he didn't specify much about. You didn't bother to push for more information about it anyway, you trusted him. You hear a sudden 'whoosh!' from behind you, as your ears twitched at the sound and you whipped your head around to see Shadow, causally approaching you and placing a kiss on your forehead. "Back already?"

You ask, not expecting him to come back so soon. "Sounds like you didn't miss me." He teased, circling around the couch to sit next to you. "(Name), I would like to show you something I have found while I was away." He spoke, as you placed a bookmark into your book and quickly switching off the background music you had playing, then turning your head towards him to give him your full attention. "What, now? It's almost 11.30 pm, Shads."

You lightly protested "Trust me, my love. It will be worth it." He offered you the smallest smile, before standing up, pulling you up along with him. "Alright, alright."

Shadow held your hand as you trudged through an unfamiliar forest with him, it was pretty peaceful at this time of night, only hearing the rustling of leaves and the chirps from cricket around. "Are we nearly there yet?" You nag in a lighthearted manner. "Almost, love." He says, holding your hand as he lead you through the forest, suddenly coming to a stop. You walk forward to stand next to him, looking at the landscape in awe. The lush of the forest stopped blocking out your view, as you see a small patch of grass and pretty prairie flowers, with an outline of rock deviding the grassy patch and the edge of a cliff that Shadow brought you to. "It's beautiful.." You murmur, upon seeing the gorgeous scene. The night sky was almost cloudless and clear, the moonlight shining bright, the silvery rays of light gently illuminating the two of you. You turn to look at him with a small smile. "Not as beautiful as you." He said, voice barely above a whisper. You stifled a short laugh from the overused phrase you hear often, finding humor in how it's considered corny. "Sure, honey." You said, walking forward to sit down on the grass patch, admiring the scenery. "I mean it." You hear Shadow say, as you feel him sit beside you, you lean your head on his shoulder. "(Name).." He began, as you turn your head to look at his pretty crimson eyes. "I wanted to show you this view, because I wanted to share the beauty of it, but to also remind you how much you mean to me." He spoke, intertwining his hand with yours. Offering you the slightest ghost of a smile. "And i love you, (Name)." You offer him a sweet smile leaning in to share a kiss with him, his lips soft and tender, feels like home.. you'd think. "I love you more, Shads." You reply, as he pulled you in closer.. In these moments, you loved him for the way he made anything feel so safe and peaceful.

THERE WE GO FIC NUMBER TWO LETS GO LETS GO im also finding my writing style and the banner thing ;3

[whateverisbeautiful]

♥️Reveling in Richonne - TOWL

#44: The Family Gifts (1.05)

I love that they have this scene take place in a souvenir shop. 😊 Rick already turns the whole world into a gift shop when it comes to finding things to gift to Michonne so it’s only fitting that he’d find the perfect thing to get her in this place.

But what's extra special is now Rick's history of getting Michonne gifts has expanded to thinking about gifts for the son she gave him too - with RJ being the ultimate gift for them both. And seeing these two converse as parents in this scene was super heartwarming 🥰...

The scene starts with Rick knocking on the shop's door and then they open it and have the cutest little look exchange before entering the shop. It’s so subtle but I love it. 😊 They’re in such a good, peaceful, lighthearted mood and I always love those moments where it’s so clear that on top of being husband and wife, Rick and Michonne really are best friends. And yes I got all that just from a quick playful look. 😋

They enter and when Michonne walks pass those touristy license plates she taps them with her stick and keeps walking. I love that when she hits the rack Rick immediately looks over at her wondering what that’s about. He looks like if the license plates did something to her then he's gonna have beef with them too lol.

gif cred: @nat111love

Michonne says, “Never did like those” and I love that Rick immediately knows why as he says, “No 'Michonnes,' huh?” Michonne says, “Not even once” and I like that in TOWL we’re even just getting these tiny insights into the characters from the world before.

I know so many with unique names could relate to this license plate moment. And 'Michonne' really is such a unique and pretty name and uncommon as Okafor noted. 'Michonne' is also Rick’s favorite word. I’m convinced. 😌 And ever since this scene, my headcanon is that Rick, RJ, and Judith definitely work together to create some type of 'Michonne' license plate and gift it to her. 

gif cred: @nerd4music

As Rick continues to look at the license plates he stops and sees one that says 'Junior.' And y’all, the second I saw the junior license plate my heart was already bursting knowing exactly where this was going.

I love that they make it a point to show that there are Rick and even Richard license plates available too but the one that catches his eye is 'Junior.' It just shows how Rick is already so proud that his son is his Junior. 🥲

And then my heart just does flips and leaps hearing Rick say RJ’s name for the first time as he so sweetly asks Michonne, “Is this a terrible gift to bring to RJ?” Y'all, I'm smiling and crying at the same time. 🫠 Like how precious is this. 😭

You just know on this road trip home Rick and Michonne have been talking a lot about their kids and I love that Rick is thinking about his son and wants to bring him a gift. Especially because, as I mentioned in an episode 4 breakdown, they have a book they're bringing to Judith so I'm sure Rick wants to make sure they have a gift for RJ too.

I knew after episode 4 we were going to be seeing Healthy & Alive Rick all through episode 5 and that was so clear in this scene. Cuz this is the real Rick right here. Being a whole father. Being his affectionate gift-giving self. I love to see it. 😌

gif cred: @kris-lulu

There’s also something so sweet about him wondering if it would be a 'bad' gift. It’s bittersweet because it’s a reminder that Rick hasn’t had a chance to know his son or what he'd like but it’s great knowing he soon will have the chance to learn it all. 

Michonne smiles and then informs Rick that “No one has ever once called him Junior.” I love that when so many of us heard that we immediately decided that this means Rick will be the only one to call RJ 'Junior' and it’ll be their father/son thing. 👌🏽

gif cred: @krislulu

Rick says, “Ah okay” and puts the license plate back, and then Michonne smiles at him clearly finding him so cute in this moment and knowing the father of her child is the best man on earth.

And then she has the warmest kindest tone as she tells Rick, “You’re bringing yourself back. That’s more than enough.” I love this so much. 😭

gif cred: @kris-lulu

It's so touching that Michonne wants Rick to know he’s the gift. The gift that’s more than enough too. 🥹 Like truly their family is going to be so much more whole with his return.

The wording of 'bringing yourself back' also always makes me think of how he’s literally coming back but also he’s been acting like himself again, so it’s like Rick is bringing his true self back rather than burying it. And that’s also more than enough.

I love that Michonne is always reminding Rick of how cherished he is. And it’s also this reminder that him being with them is the best thing he can do. Just like when she said I only feel safe with you, Rick is again getting this confirmation that his presence is as needed and valued as his protection. 👌🏽

Rick says, “The Brave Man, huh?” and I like how this shows that Rick has been thinking a lot about who he is to his kids.

This got me thinking about how when Rick decided to die he had to surrender the idea of ever seeing his wife and daughter again. He accepted that all he’d ever have is the fading memories and just the honor of having got to love and protect them at all, even if for far briefer a time than he’d hoped. So now, it has to be pretty surreal for him to know he really will be back with them and with the son he wanted but didn't know he had.

gif cred: @nat111love

And if he’s at all worried if he’ll live up to his kids' expectations of him being The Brave Man, Michonne so wonderfully quells those doubts when she again so sweetly and sincerely says, “You are. More than ever.” 🥹🥹🥹

I know I’ve said it 1000 times but I adore the way Michonne believes in and uplifts Rick and this line right here might be my favorite example of that.

gif cred: @nat111love

I love how Michonne can always sense Rick's subtext and underlying feelings and then address them in the perfect way. Because she can sense that Rick is nervous about meeting his son for the first time and maybe worried about how it’ll go just showing up in his life after all these years. But Michonne saying this is reminding Rick that by choosing to come home, especially when he had been so convinced prior that he couldn’t and shouldn’t, is a brave thing and very commendable and he really is the great man his kids think he is.

It’s so precious too that Rick gets to see that it’s not just his kids but his wife who truly views him as The Brave Man. Like even tho Rick said last ep that he’s not the brave man, Michonne wants him to know their babies got it right with that title. 💯

And by pushing through all the fear that was keeping him chained to the CRM, Michonne thinks he’s the bravest he’s ever been for doing that. 🥹 I appreciate how Michonne and Rick find so many ways to say 'I love you' even without saying the three words directly. And this was 100% that. They really breathe life into each other with every encouraging word and gesture.

gif cred: @nat111love

As Michonne turns around we get even more adorableness as Rick spots a name bracelet and thinks what he thinks when he sees most any item, “this could be turned into a gift for Michonne.”

gif cred: @coolpartytimefan

So being cute and sneaky trying to not get caught with the jewelry since he wants to surprise her with it later, he grabs the 'Michelle' bracelet and breaks it so that it becomes an M bracelet.

gif cred: @nat111love

Can my extra self break down all the reasons I adore this real quick? 😋

One; I absolutely love that because Rick notes every detail of Michonne he knows she’s missing her signature M necklace and so, as he’s always been so good at doing, he finds a way to essentially replace the one she lost.

Two; I love that Rick said if this place doesn’t have ‘michonne’ gifts he’ll find a way to make one.

Three; Something about him making the M bracelet on his prosthetic felt symbolic to me. He literally lost that hand because he’d choose being with Michonne over his own limbs. And now after doing everything he could to be with her, he has her and is still finding ways to give her every good thing he can.

Four; if I'm not mistaken, I believe it was said by Danai that the initial M necklace was from Michonne's mom and so I love that Michonne’s two M pieces of jewelry came from two of the people that love her most. 🥲

Five; After all those years of Michonne wearing that wedding ring with her necklace, I love that her husband is now with her and getting her new jewelry…and he’ll also be giving her some even more meaningful jewelry by the end of the ep. Amen. 😏

Six; It’s just so romantic and thoughtful. It’s so Rick to do this. And I love all these heartfelt gestures that add to Richonne’s epic love story. 

gif cred: @coolpartytimefan

Rick pockets the bracelet, waiting for the right moment to gift his wife. Michonne then says, “He might be ready for this” as Rick turns around and sees Michonne holding a hatchet, similar to one of Rick's signature weapons in TWD. I adore that she saw that weapon and was like this would be a good fitting gift for Rick’s mini-me. 😋

And then something I always appreciate so much is hearing Rick ask, “Is that who he is?” I think it’s so sweet and such a sign of what a good dad Rick is. Of course, he’d be flattered if his son followed in his footsteps but the question shows that he also wants to know who RJ is regardless of him. You just know he’s prepared to love RJ whether he’s like him or not and I just love that he wants to know all about what RJ is like. 

And then it’s great that Michonne gets to tell him just how much she meant it when she said their kids are some Richonne kids when she says, “Judith has a sword. They’re us.” Hearing her say their kids are her and Rick never fails to elate me. 🥰 It’s such a true statement.

I love imagining that now that they’ve reunited Rick has got to see firsthand that Judith doesn’t only have a sword, she’s a whole pro with the sword just like her mom. 😌

I love how proud Michonne is of her kids. She raised them to be survivors while still giving them a childhood. And seeing Rick and Michonne talk as RJ and Judith’s parents in this scene was everything. The best mom and dad. 💛

But they’re also the best husband and wife and I love how that got to take center stage in TOWL.

So after this lovely parents moment, Rick is back to reminding us why he’s Husband of the Year ever year when he spots the absolute perfect minty fresh gift to give his wife.

And y’all, I gotta do a part two because this next part has Rick saying one of my favorite things of all time and it needs its own post. 😇

But as for this moment, Rick and Michonne are such a gift to each other. And their kids are such a gift to them. And this scene is such a gift to me. 🥰 And honey, because we’re spoiled rotten with this miniseries, this gift of a scene just keeps on giving with what comes next. 👌🏽😌

[l1v1ngd3dgrrl]

pleaseee can you make some daisuke x fem!tradgoth reader (you can make it nsfw i don't mind) i can't find anything and i think it would be soso cute

Daisuke x fem! Tradgoth Reader [sfw+nsfw]

an: I heart Alt x Normie couples so much ashaslkfja. I'm not exactly Trad goth but I love love love the style.

[MDNI because I'm an 18+ account, and there's some nsfw in this.]

mdni banner: cafe kitsune

cw(s): fem reader, some stereotypical alt x normie scenarios, not full on porn but sexual situations.

SFW (pre-dating)

You made the first move! You saw his little happy sunshine ass and was like "oh yeah, i need him."

He was a regular at his local arcade-which just so happens to be the same place you work at! It's one of the few places that didn't have a strict dress code, so you didn't have to de-gothify yourself too much for work.

You would watch him when he came in, his main games being those dancing rhythm games, or the space shooters. He was fantastic at dance dance revolution but sucked at space invaders. It was cute honestly, watching him fail and come up the counter for hours on end to get change to try again at the games.

Most customers were a little put off by you, intimidated by your fashion choice. Not Daisuke. He appreciates fashion, even fashion he doesn't quite understand

He found your style unique, there weren't many goths-let alone full on trad goths in your area so you stood out. He asked you about goth stuff when he could, interested in why you dressed the way you did.

Not maliciously! he's just curious.

He (in a lighthearted way) gave you the nickname Wednesday after you wore a similar dress on one of your more laid back days.

SFW (Dating)

Like I said, you made the first move. While he was the one who probably fell first, he cannot talk to women (or anyone he's attracted to) for the life of him. When the relationship was still fresh he was constantly stuttering and fidgety.

Somewhere within the first few weeks he confessed that part of the reason he was attracted to you was because of some cartoon character he had a crush on as a kid. Obviously your personality was the main thing-that was just an added bonus.

You introduce him to a few goth bands, it's not his favorite genre but he does give each song you recommend to him a listen. ( I have a feeling he would like some of The Cure's music, Maybe a couple of The Sisters of Mercy songs too.)

He lets you do his makeup sometimes, but he loves watching you get ready on your more elaborate days. Has tried to do your makeup for you but his hands aren't as steady so your eyeliner ends up crooked.

Thrifted you a bunch of cool fishnet shirts and various black clothing pieces for your wardrobe.

For an anniversary gift one year he managed to find this really badass Victorian vanity for you. It's now happily sitting in your bedroom.

Loves going to goth clubs with you, the dancing makes him feel so free AND he gets to spend it with his smokin' hot goth girlfriend? fuck yeah!

He doesn't use any super gothy nicknames for you, though he secretly likes it when people say you're like Morticia and Gomez.

Will passive aggressively defend you from any of those 'goth dommy mommy' freaks who try hitting on you.

NSFW

a She Wants Revenge song has played at least ONCE while y'all fucked. (i've seen a few memes about this and thought it would be funny to include)

Secretly likes it when you still have your makeup on, especially black lipstick. Seeing it smudged after you two finish making out or you sucking him off?? hot, like really hot.

bonus points if you leave hickeys on him and a trail of lipstick marks.

he loves seeing you undressed, but seeing you in some dark lingerie really really gets him going.

he worries about making you feel objectified so he doesn't do the whole "oguhgh big tiddy goth gf" shit ( unless you're into that wink wink)

[nosyp]

Spending New Years w/ the Generation of Miracles + Kagami

A/N = I actually forgot KISE WTFFFF... sorry y'all... :( thank u to the person who mentioned it... ilysm

Akashi Seijuro

He plans a refined and quiet evening just for the two of you.

Organizes a fancy dinner, making sure every detail is perfect. It includes flowers, music, lighting and food.

After dinner, you share a peaceful moment, maybe watching the fireworks from a balcony.

At midnight, Akashi pulls you close, softly kisses you, and wishes you a calm, sincere "Happy New Year."

Kagami Taiga

Chooses a lively and fun way to celebrate, like a New Year's party or late-night basketball game.

Keeps everything lighthearted, always making sure you're having a good time.

At midnight, he picks you up in a big bear hug, spinning you around with excitement.

Yells “Happy New Year!” with that energy of his, completely enjoying the moment.

Kuroko Tetsuya

Keeps it simple, maybe watching fireworks or stargazing on a quiet rooftop.

He’s not the type to plan extravagant things, but he makes sure it’s meaningful.

At midnight, Kuroko quietly hands you a small, thoughtful gift, like a handwritten letter or a charm.

He softly wishes you "Happy New Year" with a rare, gentle smile, feeling content just being with you.

Midorima Shintarou

Insists on starting the year off right with a visit to a shrine, ensuring good luck for the both of you.

You both make wishes, and he makes sure you do everything by tradition.

At midnight, he hands you a small token, like a lucky charm or a keychain, for good fortune.

In his usual serious tone, he says "Happy New Year," wishing you success and happiness for the year ahead.

Aomine Daiki

Keeps the night laid-back, maybe playing basketball or watching a late-night game together.

He’s not big on big celebrations, but he enjoys the casual vibe of the night.

As midnight strikes, Aomine leans in with a smirk, giving you a quick but sweet kiss.

He casually says "Happy New Year," and then immediately relaxes into his usual easygoing attitude.

Murasakibara Atsushi

Prefers a cozy night in, filled with snacks, TV shows, and relaxation.

He enjoys the calmness of the night and feels comfortable just being with you.

At midnight, Murasakibara lazily pulls you into a warm hug, his tired eyes half-closed.

He mumbles a sleepy "Happy New Year," not needing anything fancy to make the night special.

Momoi Satsuki

Loves excitement, so she suggests a fun night out—maybe a lively celebration or trying new activities together.

She enjoys making things feel festive and will be sure to keep things cheerful.

At midnight, she’ll give you an excited hug, her eyes sparkling with happiness.

Gushing with excitement, she says "Happy New Year!" and spends the rest of the night showering you with affection.

Kise Ryouta

Bro plans the MOST exciting, picture-perfect New Year's celebration, likely taking you to a party or fireworks show.

He’s all about making the night memorable, taking plenty of selfies and posting cute couple moments.

At midnight, he wraps you in a tight hug, spinning you around dramatically for maximum romance.

Wishes you a super enthusiastic “Happy New Year!” with a big, radiant smile, promising to make the year amazing for you both.

[vaspider]

It seems like you might be having a bad day? That AITA post was a really lighthearted promo and faux links ala Rick Rolls are an established part of internet sillies. It wasn’t malicious and the subject they linked to is free.

You’re generally a more level headed person so I was surprised to see how aggressive you got. But based on your reaction the author is getting doxxed which does feel unfair given the nature of the post.

Okay, no. Absolutely not.

First of all: This is the last thing I'm saying about that post. Anybody trying to continue this conversation with me in any way after this response will be blocked.

We're not doing that nonsense up there. We're not doing the "Spider is responsible for someone else's behavior" thing. I've been very, very clear that I don't endorse harassment or doxxing, and I've also been very clear that I'm not responsible for what other people do. Saying, "I don't like deceptive links, and this has done the opposite of interesting me, it's upset me and made me not want to read this; heads-up, y'all, this isn't a legit AITA post," which is all I ever said, really, isn't in any way an incitement of doxxing or harassment, and it's absolutely shitty of you to try to lay that at my feet.

Are deceptive links (commonly called "RickRolls" even when they don't link to the Rick Astley video) a fun and hilarious part of internet culture? Not really, actually. Most links on the internet that don't lead to where they say they lead aren't fun and cheerful little "memes" (the post wasn't a meme, but we'll use the word the OP used) inviting people to read a free queer book: they're usually part of social engineering phishing campaigns.

What makes the original RickRoll sometimes acceptable is a) the fact that you immediately know you've been "got" because an Original RickRoll is unmistakable after the first time you experience it, b) the link serves as a punchline to a specific kind of internet joke, usually along the lines of "click this link for news that seems too good to be true," which reinforces the idea that you have to be careful about believing what you see online, and c) it's unique. It actually isn't funny, cute, or cool to put deceptive links up online, with the possible exception of a well-executed Original RickRoll. That's the entire point of why Original RickRolls work.

Deceptive linking is a behavior that is illegal in some jurisdictions & is also grounds for banning from a lot of sites, including, wait for it:

Deceptive or Fraudulent Links. Don't post deceptive or fraudulent links in your posts. This includes giving links misleading descriptions, putting the wrong “source” field in a post, setting misleading click-through links on images, or embedding links to interstitial or pop-up ads.

Tumblr.

Got that? It's actually against the fucking rules here. It's really, really clearly written in Tumblr's User Guidelines section of the Terms of Service. You know, the rules everybody is supposed to be following to be here?

So, no, I'm not "having a bad day," except that people keep being asshats to me for saying, "I don't think it's cool that you did this thing (that breaks the ToS on the site and uses a technique commonly used for spearphishing) to promote your book, actually," doubling down on it by trying to shame me by using the fact that it's a queer book as an emotional lever, and now I've got this ask both trying to make me responsible for other people's behavior and acting like me saying "hey, this isn't cool, and no, that response isn't cool either," and then blocking the person and moving on with my life is somehow not "levelheaded."

tl;dr:

Deceptive linking is against TOS, actually.

I'm not responsible for other people's bad behavior. I did not invite or incite that behavior. I just said "this thing you did isn't okay."

I have expressly disavowed doxxing and harassment for years, both because it's shit and because I've been a repeat victim of it.

How dare you, actually.

I blocked the OP after my second response. I'm not going to talk about this anymore. Anyone sending me any further asks about the subject whatsoever or attempting to continue this conversation with me in any way will simply be blocked.

Fuck's sake.

[yourheart-inmyhands]

Yesss I can finally request!!1!!!

Sorry I just wanted needed to know this 😔

Yan!Archons with a s/o who acts like a mother. Like with Zhongli, the s/o treats Xiao and Qiqi like their children. I feel like most of them would take advantage of it 💀💀

i'm pretty sure i've said it before but i don't particularly want kids but y'all give me awful baby fever D:<

Warning: this post contains yandere-themes, including delusional behaviors, uh honestly there isn't much in this one either, other potential topics. Please read at your own risk!

Yandere!Venti thinks it’s cute, seeing the way you interact with the little kids around town. Diona and Klee adore you, loving that you always bring them snacks and treat them with such kindness. It especially warms his heart because he knows how absent their real parents are so he doesn’t mind letting you out of the house more often for their sake. He also won’t deny the absolute baby fever it gives him, the sudden urge to have children of your own taking over his mind entirely. 

Venti couldn’t help the smile on his face as he watched you play around with the two girls. They had insisted you help them with their hair, them having messed it up after playing tag in the city. He couldn’t deny the sudden urge to have a child of your own, a sweet little thing that was the perfect mix of the two of you. Archons couldn’t have children with humans though, so for now he was content to watch you interact with the local Mondstat kids, dreaming of the day you could have your own.

Yandere!Zhongli would find you parenting Xiao and QiQi to be quite humorous. He had spent many years trying to parent the angsty boy himself and yet you made much faster progress in a month. QiQi could also be quite the challenge and yet you had the patience of an Archon themself with her. A true gift to him and both the kids.

Zhongli watched as you scolded Xiao for getting hurt again, leaving QiQi to find him and bring him back to BuBu Pharmacy. It was quite funny to see the boy get so flustered, hands fiddling with his polearm. Zhongli had gotten on the boy's case many times about this and he never seemed to take it to heart, but you had a different effect on the male. Even QiQi seemed to naturally trust your judgment despite her forgetful nature. It warmed Zhongli’s heart to see you getting along so well with the two, loving her naturally you seemed to fall into the parental role. 

Yandere!Raiden doesn’t see any use in children, after everything with Kunikuzushi she simply has no desire to be in the parental role. She also believes it to be unnecessary for you as the two of you will never have children together. Despite this she will still allow you to interact with the local children, namely Sayu.

Raiden sighed as she saw you playing with the young girl in the courtyard, a lighthearted game of tag being played amongst the two of you. Sayu often came here to hide out from Kano Nana, enjoying the sunlight naps that you two would take or the fun, simple games you’d play. Tag was her favorite but she was also fond of hide and seek as well as eye spy. While Raiden would never outright tell you that she disapproved, she’d never join you either, making it known her opinion from across the way. Her subtle glare and cold shoulder all the proof you need. 

Yandere!Furina doesn’t like kids, she thinks that she should be the only one to get your undivided attention and that she’s plenty fun and entertaining. Why do you want to hang out with kids when she's already baby?

An annoyed huff left Furina’s as you continued to interact with the Melusines. You two were supposed to be out on a date together, not hanging out with the Melusines. It was Neuvillette’s job to look after them, not yours! You should be paying attention to her, giving her your love and time and focusing on what she has to say. She’s certainly going to throw a fit if it continues, and even more so if you just try to brush it off. You are Furina’s partner and you should be giving her all your love.

[reveluving]

Damn ive never seen you earlier, you write graves just amazing :(

Idk if you are still taking requests but how do you think graves approached his shy gf/wife in the first place? Is he persuasive?

Aww babe!! That is so nice of you to say! 😭 Sorry it took a bit of time ‘cause I admit, I’ve never thought of this, not deeply, at least! Please enjoy ‘cause I know I did 😘💗

Includes: tooth-rotting fluff!

COD x shy!wife thots closed! Thank you, everyone, for your time & amazing minds! I sincerely hope I can do this again with y'all soon! 💌

Come & check out my COD m.list!

The possibilities of meeting Graves for the first time are endless, but I have two in mind!

The first scenario is a typical but well-loved meet cute at a café, or a bookstore or better; a book café! With you and him standing in one corner of the counter, waiting for your drinks. Graves has zero problems in offering you a polite smile, only for his amusement to grow when you return the smile, albeit a smaller one, before immediately averting your gaze. 

The barista’s taking a while to make your drinks, so after some time, he thought of just striking up a conversation.

“They’re sure takin’ their sweet time.” Was the first thing he said to you. A lighthearted comment—you would’ve been more worried if he was more gruff about it, and you weren’t even a worker there.

You nod, huffing in amusement while looking at the dishevelled teenager, “They don’t usually take this long.”

Graves nods along and though he asks you some things, such as if you were a regular customer or if you had any recommendations, regardless of whether it was sweet treats or any novels you may have stumbled upon (even if he’s not a fan of reading, he may or may not like the way you slowly yet surely open up with him), he keeps them a bare minimum. He doesn’t want you to feel forced, especially since he began the conversation.

Soon, the barista finally completes your order, but unfortunately, it’s prepared wrongly. 

Yours were hot while Graves was iced. The complete opposite of what you and he asked for.

He was perceptive, seeing you grimace but also ready to just accept whatever was offered, Graves spoke up.

“Excuse me, kid, but I’m pretty sure you got our orders mixed up,” You would’ve panicked if it wasn’t for his cordial approach. Disappointed or not, he had no problem hiding it. And even so, you couldn’t help but feel bad when they heard the dreadful words. They must’ve faced a harsher customer in the past. 

Graves was quick to reassure them, even telling them to take the mistaken orders and share with a colleague, much to your surprise. Of course, you weren’t expecting him to lash out, not right away, at least, but you weren’t blind to his… lifestyle. Just from the way he carried himself, you knew he must be some kind of a ‘man of the hour’. That, and the way he dressed/his items i.e. his laptop bag, phone. 

And yet, you never saw him as one of those unapproachable degenerates. Thinking they were high and mighty, maybe even cause a ruckus and gain some kind of benefit out of it. He was confident, sure, but he could’ve just ignored you the whole time, much like now. 

“Thank you.” You thanked him softly when the barista, with the weight seemingly lifted off their shoulders, went back to make you and Graves’ orders again. 

“It’s no problem. Thought y’might need a little help.” So he did notice. You wanted the floor to swallow you whole for not hiding your emotion better, but something about his smile, his lack of judgement, it didn’t make you feel too bad about it all. 

Plus, you couldn’t lie and say he wasn’t easy on the eye, either.

Bonus if you decide to take a leap and accept his offer of sitting together at the window seat, especially if it’s during the lunch rush! The two of you may become regulars at the café and soon enough, you exchange numbers!

The second scenario is actually part of a mini-series that I’m working on (read: collecting dust), with you being a florist! While I won’t spoil a whole lot, it involves our beloved Shiba Inu. By now, we all know Kai is extremely playful, borderline mischievous if it means being a loving pain in Graves’ ass. 

So, after looking away for a moment, only to find Kai making a mess out of some flower shop owner’s potted flowers, he’s initially more disappointed (but not surprised) than worried. But nothing a little Southern charm and a bit of reimbursement can’t solve. 

That is until he sees you.

And while this revelation wouldn’t leave him to tuck his tail between his legs, I can see him going like ‘oh’, turning away for a second to swear under his breath before putting on his award-winning smile. But in all honesty, there’s a tad bit of guilt in it, especially after he overhears you forgive Kai, who, surprisingly, is whimpering in front of you, despite your soft tone.

Oh, how Graves could never forget your voice. 

Upon approaching you at the front door, he immediately apologizes, and unlike other times where he’s trying to rush the conversation so it could all be said and done, he’s very patient with you, partially praying that you were with him, too. There’s just something so magnetic about you that he doesn’t want the conversation to end so soon. But with your bashfulness, he knows not to overwhelm you either, which was funny, since he never particularly thinks about that with others.

And from there, he has an inkling that you may be one of the few people he’s willing to learn more about while considering his own personality. So, while he doesn’t shy away from showing you his romantic side, and spoils you a whole lot, too, he also lets you know about his more ‘disliked’ personality. On days when you and he are more heart-to-heart with each other, he tells you about the side of him where he has to play offence to be the person that he is. He wants to be as transparent with you as possible, so you won’t catch a ‘whiplash’ with how he treats you versus how he treats others.

Whichever the cases may be, while he is persuasive, knowing that you’re one of a kind, he knows this is something he has to be patient about, and frankly, he’s more than fine with it. If you have a history of bad dating experiences, then you best believe that he’s willing to show you just how much you mean to him, and hopefully, vice versa. Graves isn’t one to think about a committed relationship, mostly because he never found one and with his line of work, it’s a lot to think about, but he is more than willing to adapt to the new changes (and finally spoil ‘the one’) for you.

˚ · . f i n . · ˚

[anincompletelist]

[ vol i | vol ii | vol iii | fic rec fridays ]

hi all! :D I have slowly but steadily been knocking things off of my tbr list, a few classics and a few newer fics, and they've been AMAZING! as per usual I wanted to share before the list gets too long for next time!

as always, please remember to leave kudos and a comment if you enjoyed the fic or show support in other ways, and be kind! mind the tags and if you come across something you dislike, please kindly (and quietly) move on.

happy new year and happy reading y'all! <3

Have you ever been alone in a crowded room? | @hgejfmw-hgejhsf | T+ | 5k

When the Legendary Balls-Out Bananas White House Trio New Year's Eve Party is interrupted by a security threat, Henry, Pez, Nora, June, and Alex find themselves locked in the White House library for their own protection with nothing but time, a few bottles of champagne, and some lighthearted conversation, until a single question threatens to change everything for Henry.

(+ read their first au fic here ahh!)

muscle memory | @dumbpeachjuice | E | 30k

It's been ten years since Alex was in London to stage a PR friendship with Henry after ruining the royal wedding. It's also been ten years since Alex dropped to his knees in front of Henry in a Kensington Palace kitchen. But now Henry's in the Hamptons for the summer, and who should he bump into? None other than Alex Claremont-Diaz, who happens to be working in New York all summer long.

You Are the Wave I Could Never Tame | bleedingballroomfloor | E | 12k

That should be it. Henry is doing his job; the pool is getting cleaned, and Alex shouldn’t think anything more of it. Then why does he feel the slightest bit of disappointment when he walks back to the pool house and Henry isn’t there? Or, the pool boy Henry AU that I couldn't stop thinking about until I wrote it.

if evil, why so cute? | @everwitch-magiks | E | 5k

Alex’s cat hates Alex, but loves Henry, the Bookstagram influencer who’s on vacation in Alex’s quiet seaside town. And while Alex is pretty salty about his grumpy cat’s inexplicable affection for a complete stranger, he must admit he can see the appeal; Henry is fucking gorgeous. It’s why Alex follows him on Instagram in the first place. It's just, Alex had never thought he’d be officially introduced to Henry by his own goddamn cat. Or: Henry takes a two-week vacation to a seaside cabin with the intent to read a lot of books. Instead, he has a lot of sex.

Just like that | @myheartalivewrites | E | 10k

When Henry comes home from a date frustrated by the guy’s lack of expertise, Alex starts having thoughts. And then, because he’s Alex, he sticks his big foot in his even bigger mouth.

(@myheartalivewrites listen I fell down a rabbit hole ok and if I could rec your entire ao3 here I would -- OH WAIT I CAN)

In His Wildest Dreams | @myheartalivewrites | E | 11k

Set in and around the Henry bonus chapter, this is a story about Henry and Alex’s hectic schedules, family appearances etc. pulling them apart, and about what starts to happen between them, in the quiet of night: their sleeping bodies turning to each other, finding their sweet spots and opening up. And Alex and Henry learning a lot about each other in the process

Be Worthy Love, and Love Will Come | @sparklepocalypse | E | 30k

"For Christmas this year, all I would like is a best friend who doesn’t mind too much that I’m a prince. Most of my classmates poke fun because of who I am, or treat me like I’m too special to be their friend. I want a best friend who knows me as much as my family does and still likes me. I know that you can’t wrap a best friend up in a box and put it under the tree, but you’re magic so you know the best way to bring one." (Movieverse canon divergence; Prince Henry, age 8, writes to Father Christmas wishing for a best friend. A few weeks later, he finds one.)

A Picture on Your Corkboard | bleedingballroomfloor | M | 23k

It happens on a random morning in May when Alex, age fourteen, pads into the kitchen to greet his mother and steal a waffle from June's plate and sees a man sitting at their breakfast counter, reading a newspaper, a cup of coffee raised to his lips. Like he belongs. Like it's the most natural thing in the world. June doesn't seem to give the man a second thought. She merely flicks Alex on the forehead and takes back the waffle. Ellen isn't worrying, either. In fact, she's talking to him. Asking what his schedule is like. Making plans for dinner. Alex has never seen this man before in his life.

I want to mark my skin (it is paper thin) | @violetbaudelaire-quagmire | M | 10k

To: alex@biconicink.com From: hjfox@rocketmail.co.uk Subj: Tattoo Reference Attached: 1 file (orionsketch.jpg) Hello, Attached you’ll find a line art drawing of the constellation Orion. The shoulder blade is the intended location. Best, H.J. Fox [OR: It's a Tattoo Shop AU!]

(Dil)Do It Yourself | @happiness-of-the-pursuit | E | 16k

“Listen,” Nora starts, turning her body once more so that she’s sitting sideways in the chair with her legs thrown across the armrest. “I did the math. There’s a 79% chance you’re gonna become a slut to the power of the prostate, and while we’re not dating anymore, it’s my duty as your fellow slutty bisexual to get this party started.” Or, when Nora drags Alex to a holiday dildo workshop, he doesn’t expect to find someone to use it with.

just a figure of speech | @congee4lunch | E | 17k

“Like I said: Alphas really don’t know how to fuck.” “And like I said,” Alex sets down his mug and steps closer to Henry. “I can fuck and I know how to fuck you so well, you’ll see stars, baby.” [henry, an omega, hasn’t had good sex in a long time. as his alpha roommate and friend, alex can help with that. in a totally platonic bro way, of course]

+

saving some for next rec, I'll see you all then! enjoy, and remember to show support if you did! <3

xx

[cowboyfromh3ll]

hiii! i love love love your writings! i was thinking of something cute and i knew you would be the best person to write it! so what about fem!reader who joined the gang recently and its so obvi to everyone at camp she has a big fat crush on arthur! maybe shes too shy to say anything to him so the gang often tease her and him and are all like “when are y’all gonna date!?” i find it so cute imagining then two being so flustered around each other ESPECIALLY reader… shes just so shy around him!! imagine her doing some sewing with the girls and she doesn’t even realize shes repairing a tear in arthurs fav blue shirt! maybe abigails like “aww thats so nice of you repairing arthurs shirt” and shes like HUHHH🥺(im sorry this is so long i got carried away hehe)

Somethin' Stupid 

(Arthur Morgan x Fem!Reader Fluff)

I'm working around the clock for y'all 🫶

Warnings: none y'all r just cute

You’d found it mildly absurd how when you first came to camp upon the rear end of Arthur’s horse, how shortly after you had integrated yourself in with the camp girls, they had begun teasing you over your proximity to Arthur. When he had first saved you from a group of Murfree Brood, you’d been weary of the man before you; convinced the devil himself had sent another of his minions your way to continue brutalizing you as some sort of unscrupulous punishment. You’d nowhere to go, and nothing to call yours except the squalid chemise on your back; you hadn’t even a pair of shoes, forced to run through the woods of Roanoke Ridge on bare foot. Though upon offering you food and shelter, with no trace of forcefulness or malicious intent in his voice, you’d slowly warmed up, hesitantly allowing him to pull you up onto his horse. By the time you arrived, your arms were wrung around Arthur’s waist tightly.

You’d explain to Arthur how your family was traveling up north until you’d been ambushed, your parents being murdered and left behind, while they took you and your wagon as a prize claim. Besides the other women at camp, you had been hesitant to trust anyone of the other men besides Arthur. You often spoke to him, scarcely with the others. It was easy to find comfort in the man who had saved you, and you revered him the same way one would revere their lifelong hero. He held a reassuring aura; it told you that he’d never allow anything to happen to you again as long as he was around. 

Upon the first few days of your arrival, a few men in the camp would pass by the tent you were resting in, ogling awfully long at you with the same astound interest as a child in a zoo. You’d taken things easy, allowing yourself to rest and recover your aching body while the women took care of you. Susan Grimshaw, the motherlike figure in camp, would tend to you meticulously. She’d shoo away any men who got too close to you, including Arthur, insisting that he would be tiring you out by talking to you. 

In the small windows of time where Grimshaw wasn’t circling you like a hawk, you’d invite Arthur over and entertain lighthearted conversation. Socialization proved to be one of the most healing things, and within a few weeks you’d broken out of your withdrawn and tense state. 

The initial allegations over your sweetness for Arthur were uncalled for, almost downright insulting. The basis for such claims made no sense to you, and you argued that it only made sense for you to find so much comfort in the man who had saved you. That, much to your dismay, only fueled their teasing. Your counterpoints that you had just experienced terrors beyond comprehension fell on deaf ears, and they instead said it just made all the more sense you’d cling to Arthur. Your biggest teaser, Mary-Beth, swooned over your supposed love story, insisting she write something based on the two of you. 

Your interactions with Arthur did not help either. What you thought was normal, was picked apart by virtually everyone in camp who watched you interact. Their main point of contention was the way Arthur allowed you to leaf through his journal, even drawing you from time to time and bashfully handing you the drawings; apparently no one else was allowed near it. Whenever you spoke of a particular flower you saw, or an animal you found cute, Arthur would coincidentally happen to have a drawing of it. There were a few pages Arthur did not allow you to look at. Initially, you thought perhaps they were far too emotional or dark, but he’d already allowed you to read every dark entry in his journal already. You’d begun having your suspicions, but out of respect for him, and not wanting to break his trust for you, you did not read certain pages. Arthur would find it far too embarrassing for you to read through his pages full of sweet nothings about you.

A few of your accusers in camp were shared by Arthur, one of which being Uncle. You could practically hear him hollering at Arthur from across camp about how he needed to fess up to you and ask you out already, to which he’d receive a grumbled “shut up”. The obnoxiously loud interaction had you blushing and fidgeting uncomfortably as people looked over at you knowingly, their gazes intensifying when Arthur would walk over to you, greeting you with an embarrassed “Hey”. 

As your affections for Arthur grew, so did your coyness. You’d fidget with your hair, twirling strands around your finger. The two of you would trip over your words in a painfully kittenish attempt at conversation. Arthur would listen patiently as you tried to gather yourself after failing miserably at delivering a simple sentence because of how much you were trembling around him. And you’d grant him the same level of patience when he’d anxiously ask if you’d be okay with posing for him for a drawing. 

Sometimes you’d practice certain things to say to Arthur, fantasizing over how scenarios would play out in your head and giggling as each and every time the fantasy would end with Arthur professing his love for you. It was your main form of entertainment whenever you carried out the mundane, everyday tasks that the camp required of you. Seemingly lost in your own world, you’d think up of a million ways how you and Arthur would come to a union. And as you became engrossed in your daydreams, you’d lose focus and end up pricking yourself with your sewing needle. Your fingertips were littered with pin pricks at this point.

You’d heard a thousand times “Why don’t you ask him out already?!”. 

You could ask yourself the same things. Perhaps it was the crippling fear of rejection. Or the foreboding thought that perhaps you had misread all of his gestures towards you as romantic. But whenever he would hand a rock to you, stating that it reminded him of you, you could not help but believe ‘Wow, he really does think of me!’. You had an entire box full of small shiny rocks and pebbles next to your cot already. 

“Sure would be nice if the men could help with the laundry once in a while.” Tilly chided, watching as a few of them sat around a table drinking. 

“Don’t count on it.” Karen scoffed, laughing dryly, sewing together one of Sean’s torn trousers. “Some of ‘em don’t even do anything around camp, and they say our jobs are easy.”

The girls giggled amongst themselves. You sighed in relief over the fact you weren’t the topic of today’s conversation for once. You sifted through a basket of freshly washed and dried clothes, making your pick as to what you’d patch up today. You pulled out a bright blue button up, looking at it with a familiarity you couldn’t quite place your finger on.

Regardless, the blue called to you, and you got to work. You’d slumped over next to Abigail, surrounded by the rest of the working girls. You fell into another fantasy between you and Arthur, drowning out the spirited chatter between the girls. The tear in the shirt wasn’t a hard task, and you found the motions rather repetitive. In the months you had been there now it was a chore you had mastered. 

You held the shirt out in front of you, studying it with pride as you admired your seamless work on the repair.

“Aw look at you, so sweet on the guy that you’re fixing his clothes for him!” Abigail teased, nudging you. 

“Huh?!” You blushed.

Suddenly, the shirt was taken from your hands, and you looked up to see Arthur. 

“Thank you, sweetheart. I appreciate it.” He told you gently, before walking off with it.  

“Oh!... You’re uhm… welcome.” You choked on your own words, glad that Arthur didn’t stick around long enough to hear. Naturally, you felt every single girl look at you, the levels of their giddyness felt even by you. Once Arthur was out of ear shot, they squealed and nudged you. 

“He called you sweetheart!” Mary-Beth crooned. 

“Did you see the way he was looking at you? COME ON! He wants you!” Karen laughed. 

“You can’t argue with this one!” Tilly added enthusiastically. You couldn’t help but giggle and go along with their teasing, cupping your cheeks as they heated up. If you could, you’d fall to your side and kick your legs while squealing about how much you liked him. 

Your mind couldn’t explain it, or make it go away. You were in love.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Somethin' Stupid - Frank Sinatra

[xelasrecords]

Tea! Would You Like Some?

Han Jumin x Reader

Jumin Week 2023 - Day 3: Quality Time @juminweek2019

High-quality time shared between two people highly stupid about their feelings. And for each other.

My x reader comeback after so long! Had a meet cute recently so y'all get a lighthearted crushing stage fic for once :)

Words: 3.9k

Masterlist Read on AO3

How soon you could come had no correlation to Jumin's expectation of seeing you materialise in his living room. At least, that was what he told himself. His traitorous fingers told a different thing. They had typed out a message asking where you were, if there was any problem with your ride, if you had input the correct address in your map, and if he needed to send out a search party if you didn't reply in the next five minutes, but that, he felt, would be too drastic.

Jumin erased the last part and sent the text. He sighed, fingers drumming on the arm of his white sofa. Contrary to Zen's belief, he was not one to blow things out of proportion. He always did just enough and everything else was simply a precaution.

Perhaps a five-minute grace was not precaution enough. Four minutes. He could wait for four.

The second his doorbell rang, Jumin leapt to his feet. He never considered the distance from the living room to the entrance too far, but now he doubted the interior design of his penthouse. Large spaces allowed him to breathe—until you took it away just by not reneging on your promise to visit. You were someone he had only met a handful of times, always with the other members and never at his own place.

Today was special. Today he decided to ignore his fear of being left behind by his loved ones and let you in.

You could be someone he loved. You could be the one who stayed.

Jumin composed himself and opened the door, and there you were, standing with your hands deep in your pockets, waiting for him.

Nothing could have prepared him for the sight of you. Despite being mussed by the wind, your hair fell beautifully around your face like a divine frame that accentuated your features. Your eyes were bright, your smile was wide, and you were wrapped in a coat that must be your favourite. He never saw you without it. He wished he knew more about your fashion sense so he could gift you clothes that you would like. He also wished he was close enough to see himself in your eyes' reflection, but that time would come later. Everything had its order, and patience was a virtue that had been drilled into him since childhood.

"I have been waiting for you," said Jumin, not bothering to hide the relief in his voice. "Did anything happen on your way here? You didn't reply to my text."

"I was rushing." Your smile turned apologetic. "Didn't check my phone, sorry."

Jumin stepped aside to let you in. The fact that your hand could have grazed his had you walked nearer to him did not escape his attention. "No matter. It's all right now that you're here."

Leading you to the white plush sofa where he had waited with perfect calmness, he felt tense and oddly exposed, like he was anticipating a foreboding that might come to pass. He did not feel like Han Jumin. This was an iteration of him that he had not been acquainted with.

"Did I make you wait too long?" you asked.

"No," Jumin said. "You didn't have to hurry. You were not yet late." He hoped the sofa would be good enough for you. He had asked his housekeeper to clean off every speck of dust he could detect, twice over.

You sat down and stared at him with a look that he couldn't discern. "I wanted to be early."

Jumin took a seat beside you, careful to maintain a respectful distance despite his heart's protest. "You possess an excellent sense of time management. We will get along well." Compliments flowed out of him easily when it came to you. If you let him, he would graciously point out your strengths one by one.

But was that disappointment on your face?—though it disappeared before he could probe further. "Yes, I love time and managing stuff." You sighed. "That's why I'm the assigned party coordinator."

Now that you were at the spot where he had cast secret spells to summon you, Jumin wasn't sure what to say. He was desperate to know if you shared his jitters. You were motionless, spine straight and hands clasped on your lap, studiously watching the black television screen. There was nothing save for the blurred reflection of both of you sitting in a similar position. He had been imagining all sorts of exciting conversations with you, but your presence had flung them out of his head. This had never happened before. An MRI scan was in order after you went home.

It was possible that you were growing bored, though your affable expression had not indicated so. But it might not mean anything, for you always seemed pleasant. You were very, very pleasant to look at. It was also possible that he was the only one with an insatiable curiosity towards you. For all he knew, you could be with a partner and merely accepted his invitation to hang out with him as a newly anointed member of the RFA. And you were a member. This was a friendly meet-up, nothing more.

"Tea," said Jumin suddenly. His voice echoed in the silence.

Startled, your head snapped to him. "What?"

"Everyone in my family learns to brew tea," Jumin explained. "The tea leaves in my pantry are directly imported from China, obtained from the only six three-hundred-year-old Wuyi trees in existence. The legend of this tea can be traced back to the age of emperors and dynasties, and it has become extraordinarily rare over time. It has the best quality in the world."

"How did you get it if it's so rare?" You were trying to hold a smile back, but it was not a mocking sneer. There was a certain fondness in it that made him want to let all his guard down and pull you into his arms.

"Auctions," Jumin simply said. "You ought to try it. It will keep you warm." Only then he noticed that you still had your coat on and was promptly filled with horror. "My apologies. I seem to have lost my manners." He outstretched his arm. "Leave your coat with me. It can't have been comfortable sitting in that."

"Shame." You handed it over. "I was planning to take a nap in this."

"Is that how people normally sleep? Or is it a tradition unique to you?" Jumin folded your coat into a perfect half over his forearm. "I'd appreciate it if you could teach me your ways."

"I was joking, Jumin. Should I teach you how to make one?" you said, in a tone so kind that he was taken aback. People tended to laugh at his face or look away politely when he failed to understand a joke.

"There is no need. I already have a handbook for it." Jumin was unable to keep smugness out of his voice. "It includes a list of one hundred jokes that you can make to both family and work colleagues alike. I have made good use of it when I need to break the ice."

"But does it include learning how to take one?"

"Unfortunately, I have yet to encounter a book for it."

You squeezed his shoulder, and the warmth of your touch penetrated all layers of his clothing that he had carefully planned. Navy blue suit, black tie, complete with a beige waistcoat and white striped shirt. Everything was new. "Don't worry," you said. "It just means the joke isn't funny to you. A good joke will make you laugh naturally."

"I see." Jumin fixed his tie. "I promise to laugh at your next joke."

"I said naturally. Honestly, Jumin. Please don't plan for it. You're going to give me performance anxiety."

"Then I look forward to your performance." He smirked, and you groaned. Something about you brought out the childlike side in him that he didn't know was still alive. "If you would wait here for a moment. I shall brew you a cup of tea. It won't be long."

Without waiting for your response, Jumin stood up, hung your coat on the silver coat rack by the hallway, and headed to the kitchen. Something was wrong with him. A smile kept threatening to break out of his face and there was a palpable beating in his throat when it should stay underneath his ribcage and he felt giddy about something. He was sure that this was abnormal. Was he finally living up to Zen's senseless claim that he was a strange creature? Jumin stowed these additional symptoms away for his next doctor's appointment. Forget MRI, he needed a full-body checkup.

Jumin heard a soft padding behind him as he turned on the kettle. Your footsteps were quiet, almost drowned by the gurgling of the boiling water and it reminded him of the elegance of Elizabeth the Third. He'd introduce you to her when she decided to make an appearance. The thought of the two of you getting along put a smile on his face.

"I thought you would've offered me wine before tea. Are you really Jumin?" you teased, peering from behind him. He was scooping oolong tea leaves into the strainer in a precise measurement when his muscles turned rigid. Your chin was nearly perched on his shoulder. He regretted that you didn't.

But Jumin dearly wished he knew either. He paused and looked over at you. Now he could see himself in your mischievous eyes. Now he saw how happy he was. The opportunity came sooner than he was prepared for. His breath hitched. "Would you like some wine instead?" he asked, keeping his gaze steady. "I have a wide variety you can choose from in the cellar."

"Tea is fine," you said. "I'll take anything you give me, really."

"Beware," Jumin said dryly. "You have not known me long. There could be poison in your drink."

It took a second for his joke to register, but when it did, you started to laugh. Jumin was stunned, then relaxed when he realised you were not under any pretences of politeness. He felt as if he got a high score for a competition he had unknowingly participated. He never used to put high importance on winning. As someone who consistently broke his own records, achievements were just another thing that his office and father would hold a customary celebration for.

But you were different. Your laughter was a prize he wanted to win all the time. He liked seeing you in joy, and liked that he was the source of it. It was a high that he never wanted to come down from.

"Did you copy that joke from your handbook?" you asked.

"I came up with it on the spot," said Jumin proudly, and your grin widened.

Your eyes flitted to the only china cup laid out on the marble countertop. "Aren't you making another for yourself?"

Jumin shook his head. "I'm not in the mood for tea."

You lifted a brow. "I am so surprised."

Jumin's forehead furrowed in genuine confusion. "Why would you be?"

You flailed your arms about. "Is tea not your passion?" you said. "You were fired up when you talked about it. That's all you've talked about. If I didn't know you better, I'd think it's your favourite drink in the world."

"I merely wanted to keep you warm, and a cup of tea was the fastest way to do it." Actually, Jumin thought being embraced by him would be faster, but he doubted you would accept his advanced advances. "You're the one who has been on my mind, not tea."

"Not tea," you repeated.

"It's nothing compared to you," Jumin affirmed.

"Oh." You pressed your palm against your cheek. "That's nice. You're nice." You gave a perfunctory sweep at his polished monochromatic penthouse, sparse but efficiently filled with the essential household items. "Your place is also nice."

But you were looking at everywhere but him, and that didn't feel as nice. "You might be the first person calling me nice besides V," Jumin said, deciding to focus on the positive. "And V is exempted as he is my closest friend. I'm not sure how to feel about this, to be honest. I'll have to think about it later."

"Take your time," you said, finally looking at him. "I'm not going anywhere."

Quietly, Jumin poured hot water into the teacup and stirred sugar into the steaming amber liquid, allowing the clinking of the teaspoon to fill the space he couldn't. For all his desire to have his interest in you reciprocated, he could not picture the reality if you did. He wouldn't know what to do with himself. He wanted to invite you into his mind, yet was frightened by the thought of you being repelled after knowing him.

"Careful, it's hot," Jumin warned as you lifted the teacup to your lips. "Tell me, how do you find it? Is it to your taste?"

You took your time sipping the tea. He suspected you did it to keep him on his toes, and had to admit that it was part of your intrigue. Jumin could never guess your next move. Anything he predicted you would prove him wrong in the most delightful way possible.

You looked up from the rim of the cup. "What if I say it isn't?"

A connoisseur in understanding your jest now, Jumin replied, "I shall melt into a puddle and lie on the floor until you give me an honest review."

"I will mop your puddle and wring it out the window."

He looked at you thoughtfully. "I'd say I'm offended, but I heard that committing murder is an expressway to one's heart."

"Sometimes even literally," you agreed.

Jumin's eyes widened. "The double meaning escaped me. You are a genius."

You set your cup down on its saucer with a delicate clink. "But is murder the only way to your heart?"

Jumin forgot the mechanism of speaking. Due to his years of experience with women whom he never spared a glance for, he could detect the act of flirting when he saw one. And you were flirting. With him. He was eighty-nine per cent sure of it. You deemed him worthy to be flirted with. Jumin almost slid down to his knees.

"No." He managed to get a full sentence out. "No," he tried again, "but you don't even have to try. Whatever you're doing, you are doing it well." Two better sentences. Magnificent.

"That's too bad," you said. Jumin noticed that your hand was still wrapped around your cup, steam unfurling on the top of it. You must still be cold. "I've been waiting to hack through your chest with an axe."

Jumin walked towards the heater controller and turned it on. "Is homicide the only thing in your mind?"

"It's more of an ad break from the thoughts of you."

At that, Jumin turned around. You had been thinking about him. He knew how impossible it was to stop thinking about you, and your admission was making him lightheaded. Did you ever dream of him and then scramble for your phone the first thing in the morning just to hear his voice? Did you ever yearn to talk about him to your friends the way he did, except his only friend was doing his habitual disappearance and the loneliness was more profound now that you were his constant excitement but he had no one to tell it to? Did you have anyone you hold dear to your heart? Were you open to considering him as one someday? It was not yet appropriate to be so upfront with his questions, he knew.

But one question should be fine. "How long have you been thinking of me?" Jumin asked.

You leaned against the counter and crossed your legs. "I talk to you every day. So, every day." He wondered if your composure was a facade, the way his was.

Jumin nodded. "We share the same habit. I can't quite recall what I used to think about before you entered our lives."

"Your darling white cat, the cat projects that generate a steady loss for your company, and some new cat-friendly inventions? Jaehee's nightmares, basically."

Jumin chuckled. "You know me well. I must say I'm surprised." It wasn't so bad to be known. He could get used to the feeling. "Assistant Kang doesn't appreciate the fine things in life. It's a pity that Elizabeth the Third is hiding somewhere right now. If you see her, you'll understand why I do all those things for her."

"You love her," you said kindly. "I understand that enough."

Jumin stared at you. You kept saying the right things and he kept falling, falling, falling.

"You've finished your tea," Jumin noted, but not without regret. He dreaded having to let you go.

You studied the empty cup. "Wow, I think I inhaled it. You were right, it was the best tea I've ever tasted. Thank you."

"I hope you will stay longer. Do you have other arrangements for the evening?" Jumin, who had arranged his whole weekend around your visit, calmly inquired.

"I don't," you said, with just as much calmness.

"My collection doesn't stop at drinks," he said. "I have a brand new record player and an array of classic vinyls. You can peruse them if you'd like. A three-star Michelin chef will be flying in to prepare dinner and you can request anything you want, provided that you do it three hours prior. There's also a gym on the second floor, though exercising is probably not the best activity since you don't bring a change of clothes." He paused. "You don't happen to bring one, do you?"

"Jumin, I—no. But I could wear yours if I so desperately need to shower here."

He thought he saw your eyes suspiciously glittered, but it was gone when you blinked. "I don't have clothes that would fit you perfectly." He frowned. "They're all tailored to my body, you see. I'm afraid you wouldn't find much comfort in them. Now, would you like to sit down? I've made you stand for too long." He guided you to the kitchen island, fingers light around your wrist, and pulled out one of the brass bar stools. "Please excuse my bad manners today. Something must have come over me. I don't tend to be like this."

You settled in your seat only to swivel back to meet his towering figure. Your knees nudged his legs, and Jumin was stunned, unmoving. He thought an attraction was supposed to burn him alive, to light him up from the inside. What he felt now was akin to petrification. It crept up on him from the ground he stood and incapacitated his ability to form coherent thoughts.

"Jumin," you enunciated his name with great care. He had never thought his name was beautiful until it lulled out of your mouth. He wanted to brand it into his memory.

"Yes," he said, because it was the only thing his mouth could form.

"Your house sounds like a treat."

"That's because it is. You can entertain yourself here. Whatever you want, I will do my best to provide it for you."

"Other guys could give me those too. There have been some, you know," you confessed, and Jumin was torn between wanting to know more about your past and quelling down the illogical jealousy it spurred. "Gold-dipped bouquets with diamonds, fancy restaurants where they ordered for me without asking about my preferences, jewellery that I wouldn't pick for myself." Your voice was tinted with slight distaste, but it was gone in the next instance. "Do you think I was swayed by them?"

Now Jumin's gaze turned sharp. This was a test, he realised. Your intention was not to compare him to other men, nor was it to flaunt how desired you were. Jumin knew the latter well without needing you to prove it to him. He felt the torrent of his desire all the time. It threatened to wash him ashore and pull him back into the raging sea, never letting him be at peace until he could be certain you wanted him back. So what would you get out of your question? Whatever your goal was, he knew what he was supposed to do. You favoured honesty, just as he did. That was one of the many things he respected about you.

"I doubt you were," Jumin said. "Your affection isn't the kind that could be bought. I may not know you intimately, but I know you would not budge under insensitive bribery, and your tale reeked of one. What they did was foul and not driven by the best intentions. That's not how you, or anyone, should be treated."

Your expression softened as you reached for his hand. "I know you're not trying to impress me with your wealth. I'm sorry if I made you think so. I meant to show you that I'd be here even without you throwing those things at me. You called me just to meet up and I came right away. If I stay back, it's because I want to spend more time with you." You averted your eyes. "Did you have to make me say all that?"

Emboldened by your hold that you hadn't let go, Jumin tilted your chin and you leaned forward by a fraction. "You enjoy my company," he said, assessing your earnest face. He could hear his racing heartbeat in his ears. "But will you stay?"

"You'd really like an encore to embarrass me," you grumbled. "Didn't you hear what I just said?"

"You phrased it as a hypothesis. I cannot be sure that staying with me is what you want unless you state it clearly," Jumin pressed. Though he was always surrounded by people, no one had ever bothered to stay. Not for long. Not for the person he was.

His fear and desperation must have shown on his face, for you let out a small breath and gently squeezed his arm, before trailing your sight to the empty cup waiting on the counter. "I think you should refill my tea," you said slowly. "I need more if we'll talk into the night, won't I?"

The warmth from your hold spread throughout his body and a smile broke through Jumin's face, his uncertainty receding. Someone as beautiful and brilliant as you, a gem rarer than his tea—for those tea leaves could be reproduced but you were one of a kind—wanted him as much as he wanted you. It was the first real smile he wore in a while. "We can switch to something stronger after dinner," Jumin suggested.

"Wine," you guessed. Oh, how he loved that you could read his mind. "I knew it. You always default to wine. Farewell, tea. His affair with you has been short but memorable."

Jumin was all too eager to agree. "Farewell."

Jumin hoped it would be a long, long time before his relationship with you could end. If it would ever end.

-

The footnotes that I thought would be an occasional extra but they just won't go away:

This fic is inspired by good dates and bad dates and that early crush feeling when you don't quite know the person yet so everything feels exciting and scary.

Don't worry, Jumin's tea rambles didn't deviate from canon. On day 8 he wishes you to learn tea brewing since all his family does it. I thought it'd be fun to highlight his nervousness by making him do something unexpected, especially since he's the type who would randomly do something out of pocket while still maintaining his gravitas.

The tea's legend is based on Da Hong Pao, a very rare, government-protected Chinese tea that you can only get if the president honours you some and from auctions. I didn't think I'd research that deep for accuracy for a mere fic but what am I if not committed.

The header is made to seem like a cheeky ad in the spirit of Jumin's tea endorsement. Contemporary fun with a touch of antiquity is what I was going for to capture the fic's mood and Jumin's preference. The challenge was to make a dynamic animation without looking flat or too complicated but still fit the time, format and size constraints. People still need to be able to immediately read the text, which means no over-the-top entrances and transitions. Truthfully, I die a little bit inside whenever I have to sacrifice aesthetics for function but it is what it is!

Youtube | Goodreads | Letterboxd | Pinterest