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chobunz · 3 months ago

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── only if you say yes. ( psh ) 🪽

๑ When trying out a dumb trend online with your best friend turns into something neither of you were very much experienced in at all..

pair: best friend!sunghoon ㅊ f!reader | warnings: smut, pwp, fluff, lots and lots of kissinggg, you’re both virgins lol, kinda subby!hoon, dry humping, hoon cries a little bit, surprise ending ?? | words: 2.1k

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

“uhh.. y’sure best friends are allowed to be doing this ?” sunghoon murmurs against the heat of your skin as you got dangerously closer. you boldly straddled his lap, telling him that you want to plant kisses all over his face with a fresh coat of pink gloss adorning your lips.

the idea randomly sprung into your head as you were watching some tiktok video about ‘covering my boyfriend’s face with lipstick kiss marks to see his reaction’ but… you didn’t have a boyfriend. you never really liked any of the gross, annoying boys at your school nor had a crush on anyone before. well, besides for one boy— the only boy you ever really cared about was sunghoon, who’s been your best friend since childhood and shared almost everything with.

the two of you were just casually sitting on your bed like usual, both your parents were gone as they had some important business meeting to attend to, leaving you both bored out of your minds with absolutely nothing better to do. you’ve always thought about kissing your best friend and how he’d react if you did it, would he be surprised ? upset ? angry ? turned on ? who the hell knows, but one thing you knew for certain was that you wanted to share your first kiss with him and only him.

“i don’t see why not, i mean.. unless you don’t want me to ?” your round eyes sparkle up at sunghoon as you ask him for permission.

the boy was far too flustered to speak, blushing softly as he gets shy and looks away, his eyes scanning the perimeters of your room. he looks at the soft pastel pink walls, your shelf full of books, random stationary, and the stuffed plushies that you’ve collected over the years. sunghoon knows practically everything about you, he knows that you’ve always liked cute things and how you’re so obsessed with all things pink and dress on the hyperfeminine side. he loves how innocent you are and how you still believe in the tooth fairy or the fact you have to sleep with a star projecting nightlight because you’re too afraid of the dark. he quite literally thought you were the most adorable, precious little thing to have ever graced this earth.

“uh, of course i want to..” “just wanted to make sure is all.” he replies awkwardly, the more cool and collected response in his head didn’t go quite as planned…

with that, your pink tinted glossy lips scattered kisses onto his rosy cheeks. the feeling of your breasts brushing up against sunghoon’s chest making him whimper, the only thing covering your nipples being the thin camisole you wore. your lips start to mark him on every spot of his face, kissing his little moles one by one. you especially loved the mole near the bridge of his nose and the one under his eye, everything just screamed perfection about him from head to toe.

you start to giggle as you find it funny that your lip marks are printed all over your best friend’s face. the way your warmth from your body heat combined with your cinnamon scented perfume only becomes stronger whenever your lips are near his face, it makes his mind all frizzy. he couldn’t think straight, he couldn’t even believe this was happening. he truly thought he was dreaming; but it was too lifelike to feel like a dream.

“you look s’cute !” you smothered a dozen more kisses along his jaw through your words.

you smiled like a giddy teenager as you pull away from sunghoon’s face, bringing your hand mirror to his face so he can see all the kiss marks you drowned him in. for some reason it felt natural to him, he was happy to have your marks on his face; he’d walk around in public with your kiss marks on his face and wouldn’t have a care in the world of what others would say/think. there’s no one else he’d rather be doing this right now with than you.

“what’s on your mind hoonie ?” you ask all innocently, wondering why he’s been so quiet this whole time.

sunghoon doesn’t say much of anything in return, instead he grabs your face and crashes his lips against yours. you didn’t know the first thing about kissing, neither did he to be honest, but he’s watched enough romance movies and k-dramas to get the gist. your eyes widen at the fact that your own best friend you’ve known since birth has his lips on yours right now. they felt soft, so plush, and molded so perfectly with yours. you never wanted this to end, you simply could kiss his pretty lips all damn day. you were caught off guard when he abruptly pulls away, he opens his eyes and sees how in shock you are. he panics at the idea of you getting mad at him but he doesn’t say a word. he’s not exactly sure what to say..

“o-oh sorry.. i just really wanted to know what it’d feel like to have your lips on mine. you’re making me.. feel all these strange things inside..” god, he feels like such an idiot. he feels as though he’s blew any chance of redemption but is quickly surprised when you pull the collar of his t-shirt to reel him back in for another passionate kiss. he doesn’t even hesitate to melt into you, you were like a drug to him, more addictive than any substance could ever be.

๑ ๑ ๑

it wasn’t long until you found yourself back on sunghoon’s lap, making out with him for what seems like hours. you didn’t know what the hell you were doing but you were doing what your natural instincts were telling you and so was he. you felt an odd sensation throughout your body, something you’ve never felt before.

all you knew was that you needed some more friction, so you rocked your hips against sunghoon’s clothed erect, feeling him grow under your thin little shorts. it felt so weird but so good at the same time, the way he ruts his hips to be in sync with your movement, how it makes your whole body tingle, your pussy was throbbing, aching for more. both you and sunghoon made the most needy, whimpering sounds against each other’s lips.

“can we do it more ? can.. can you rub yourself on me again ?. it feels so so good y/n, i can’t take it ! i need it.. need to feel you on me please please please,” sunghoon’s whines were making your heart flutter. he was just so cute ;( he may be a couple years older, taller, and a lot stronger than you, yet he was always so soft and gentle towards you.

“mm.. of course hoonie, just be good for me m’kay?” you wanted him to be a good boy for you, you wanted him to let you take care of him.

he obediently nods at your words before you quickly get off of his lap and signal him to lay down flat on your bed. you shove the millions of sanrio plushies out of the way and make sure sunghoon’s head is comfortably laying on your fluffy body pillow, it was a must to have sunghoon feeling well at all times. it definitely wasn’t in the ‘women are made to take care of men!’ bullshit kind of way but in the way that even though he’s older, taller, and stronger than you he’s still your baby. he’d do anything for you, as you would do the same for him, so that’s why he obeys so easily, he knows you’ll take good care of him.

“you look so beautiful” sunghoon whispers as you begin to slowly take your clothing off, you were left in just your white camisole and your floral panties with a cute pink bow on the front.

“lemme take your shirt off hoonie,” he nods so you take off the oversized black t-shirt, leaving him in just his sweatpants.

you could tell sunghoon wasn’t wearing any underwear especially because you can see the outline of his bulge so well, so one tug of his sweatpants and his cock will be exposed. you eye his beautiful body, how toned and muscular he was… not to mention how defined his abs looked, you’ve seen them before many times, but not like this. your manicured fingers drag across his abs, he attempts to hide his face by turning to the side but you softly grab him, cupping his chin so he could face you once again.

“don’t— i wanna look at you hoon, and you want me to do that thing again, right?” you ask him sweetly as you tilt your head, not wanting to make him feel uncomfortable.

“please. i don’ wanna sound rude but stop talking and do it again… i like feeling you so close to me.” a pout forms on his lips, so desperate and horny for you that he was sure he’d nut the second you grind on him again.

it wasn’t long when you crawl on sunghoon’s laying figure. you’re now on top of him, your core pressed against his bulge that was harder than before. you feel your lower area grow excessively wet, it was clenching around nothing. you look down at sunghoon, his eyes giving you the most pleading, innocent look. you smile at him before you start to move against him, the whines slip out of his lips so easily. you see the way he closes his eyes, the way his lips part open as he lets out soft moans for your ears to drown in.

his hands fly to your hips and slightly grips them, something tells you he wants you to move faster. you plant your hands on his chest and move your clothed pussy against his hard faster, your teeth sunk into your bottom lip as you moan at the way your clit was being stimulated by the friction. it wasn’t long until you and sunghoon both felt this strange feeling bubbling inside your stomachs, it was like a fire in your lower abdomen.. a good fire.

“hoon.. w-what is going on.. i feel weird— oh my god!” you screech as you felt yourself release warm liquid out of your pussy.

sunghoon saw the way you were slightly shaking on him, how your face twitched, how beautiful you looked when you reached your climax. soon sunghoon felt himself cream in his pants, his eyes teary from the pleasure. he sniffles as you wipe the wetness from his face.. he’s so cute. at first he thought he pissed himself until he realized it was the same liquid that comes out when he thinks about you at night. what did they call it.. cum ?? he searched it up before but he really didn’t understand it much, maybe he’ll ask you to look it up with him tomorrow.

“we should.. do that again more often..” sunghoon says to you, your body collapsed besides his, hugging him from his side. he hugs you back, he feels so close to you.. like you two are one.

your lips found their way back onto his again, subconsciously rubbing up against him again. sunghoon couldn’t help but smile to himself at how much you wanted to feel him, although he was a bit worn out he wouldn’t be opposed to going another round with you on top of him again.

you and sunghoon were enjoying each other’s company, living in the moment as you embraced one another. what you hadn’t come to realize though, were the 4 adults that happened to be both of your parents standing utterly still in shock at the door.. completely dumbfounded.

“sunghoon ? y/n ?? what are you two doing ?!” your eyes widen along with sunghoon’s as you both heard the sudden loudness of your mother’s voice.

“my baby isn’t a baby anymore, oh my gosh !” sunghoon’s mother squeals, she knew that he’s had a crush on you but he never told you. this little kiss you two shared has now basically confirmed that you were also just as much as in love with him as he was with you.

you look at your doorway and see your father, no emotion on his face whatsoever.. he doesn’t seem angry or sad he just seems… unamused ? your mother had her hand over her mouth, sunghoon’s father trying not to burst out laughing and sunghoon’s mom was over the moon that her son is finally experiencing adulthood with a girl.

you’d expect scolding from both of your parents but really they knew this was bound to happen between you two one day, they were childhood best friends themselves, hell, they all used to be friends and now they’re married with children.

guess it was safe to say, you’d be able to give sunghoon kisses all over his face without having to hide it from anyone !

admittedly this isn’t my best work buttt i rlly thought the storyline was cute so i hope some of you enjoyed it nonetheless >-< ♡︎ ♡︎ also here’s a qt little visual of what y/n was doing to hoonie pie in the beginning ehehe <3

#enhypen smut #sunghoon smut #enhypen x reader #enhypen scenarios #enhypen imagines #sunghoon x reader #enhypen drabbles #sunghoon hard thoughts #enha smut

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zombiekombi-if · 6 months ago

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Zombie Kombi

An interactive story by @josru

DEMO TBA | CHARACTERS

The cities are barren.

Not a soul has been seen navigating North America's metropolitan landscapes in years.

The undead are considered soulless, anyways.

In the late 2040s, zombies have overtaken the greater part of North America. You live on the outskirts of San Francisco, in an old, beat-up, secondhand Volkswagen Minibus. Also known as a Kombi (not sponsored).

You've been alone for as long as you can remember. Your elderly parent is long gone, and you have yet to meet another person, let alone one you're sure can be your ally.

Play as male, female or NB/GNC.

Choose your hunting level. Pick between amateur, alright, and advanced.

Romance one of four potential options (or keep them as friends, adversaries, or enemies, depending on your choices)

Choose your path:

Discover what happened to the world, causing it to be filled with the undead, by traversing to the city.

Find out about the first owner of your Kombi. (#??? videos found so far.)

Navigate conspiracies about a local settlement that seems too friendly.

Howard "How" Ngam

A mid-thirties, quiet, skeptical Thai-American man, How Ngam hates everyone and everything that's happened to him. He's the previous (read: not the first) owner of the Kombi- imagine his surprise when he stumbles upon you, living in a place he was sure he left locked and empty, meant to be his personal solitude.

He isn't the easiest to talk to, but his bristly attitude has it's purpose in this world. He's discovered a lot about the city, and How could take you there, but he's protective of those he cares about, which might include you.

Appearance: Tan-olive skin, deep-set eyes with wrinkles and dark circles, wide nose, prominent lips, shaggy, ear-length black hair, brown eyes, and stubble/mustache going on. About 5'8", fairly lean, some muscle. He's usually wearing a hand-me down, dark green jacket, and a copper-toned beanie. Heavy worker boots. Non-descript pants and shirt.

Dylan Chase

A late twenties, Half-Irish woman, Dylan is always searching for a greater purpose. She's scared, but determined to find herself in the midst of the apocalypse. You could worry that she's read too many self-help books, but she knows herself. Even if she can be a bit harsh about it.

Dylan wants more than anything to be caring, to prove to others that she's not a bad person. She lives in a well furnished settlement, where lack of resources seems to never be an issue. The guilt of being there, when everyone else is suffering, eats at her, but you could soothe her feelings, if you wish.

Appearance: Pale, warm toned, freckly-orange skin, hooked nose, sharply defined, thinner lips, deep red long hair past her shoulders, (basically think of a tomato), green wide eyes. About 5'6", very skinny, long runner legs with muscular calves. Despite the cold of San Francisco, Dylan runs hot and wears jean shorts, cropped shirts, or athleisure like hoodies and leggings.

Gloor

He's a zombie. Gloor's skin is a pallid green-blue, with splotches of beige that reminds you he was human at one point. There are chunks of skin and flesh missing from his body, but he persists on, in the way the undead always do.

He can barely hold a fully fledged sentence with you, but you can tell he doesn't mean any harm. There's something lifelike in his eyes as he stares with you, a strong purpose held in his pupils, untouched by the typical fog that zombies carry. It's even more obvious in the way he seems to still have fine motor skills: he's capable of writing a few letters for you, if you want him to.

Appearance: Green-blue skin, brownish-grey hair that's mostly all fallen out, brown eyes. No nose, lips receding. 6'2", surprisingly wide in the middle due to his ribcage. He's wearing an old, dilapidated suit, and a wrinkly dress shirt, and torn up pants.

Alia Jacobs

Named after Saint Alia of the Knife, Alia is a mid-thirties, black woman that absolutely adores pop culture and trivia. She's a massive, optimistic nerd, and maybe one that's a bit obsolete in this current time- nobody really cares to get into escapist fantasies the way she does. Either way, she's got a cabin filled with comics, old video games, and DVDs. You wonder where and how she's collected so much paraphernalia, and mainly why- and she's willing to share that with you if you don't judge her.

Appearance: Deep cool toned skin, natural loose afro to about the end of her neck, brown eyes, slight smile lines, prominent lips, straight nose. 5'3", pear shaped, hourglass body. She wears billowy, silky tops, and well structured cargo pants. She wears a lot of jewelry like rings, bangles, and earrings.

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brodygold · 2 months ago

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The Golden Haunted House

Collaboration with my bro and our head recruiter @polo-drone-009. Thanks for the pics bro! Also yes this is like my fifth Halloween story I can't help it.

Cody and I had been best friends for years, and for almost as long, we’d been dating. We were two nerdy, scrawny guys who shared a love of video games, comic books, and the thrill of exploring every weird, haunted house attraction we could find each Halloween. This year, though, we’d heard rumors about a haunted house set up by a local soccer team, the Golden Army. The place had garnered a strange reputation, with people saying it wasn’t just any haunted house, but an “experience you’d never forget.”

Naturally, our curiosity got the better of us, and on Halloween night, we found ourselves at the entrance to the haunted house in our standard mummy costumes, staring up at a large, ominous banner that read “Golden Army Haunted House: Enter If You Dare.” Cody chuckled, nudging me in the ribs. “Guess these jocks are trying to get in on the spooky season. Should be fun, huh?”

I smirked, tugging my hoodie tighter around me. “Yeah, probably just a bunch of dumb jump scares. They probably spent more time on their uniforms than the actual setup.” Cody laughed, and we both shared a knowing grin. Jocks weren’t exactly our people, and the idea of a bunch of soccer players putting on a haunted house seemed almost comical.

But as soon as we stepped inside, that lightheartedness faded. The air was thick with a strange smell—a mix of sweat, leather, and something almost earthy, like the smell of grass after it rains. Dim lights illuminated a fog-covered floor, casting shadows that seemed to writhe and move. I felt a slight chill creep down my spine. There was something intense about the space, something… different.

Cody leaned close, squeezing my hand. “Guess they’re taking this more seriously than I thought,” he whispered, his voice tinged with nervous excitement.

We took a few steps forward, venturing deeper into the dimly lit corridor that seemed to stretch on endlessly. The shadows played tricks on our eyes, shifting and flickering. Then, out of nowhere, a figure burst from the darkness, lunging at us with a terrifying snarl. Cody and I both shrieked, clutching each other in surprise before dissolving into nervous laughter. Our reactions were way more intense than I’d expected.

But as the adrenaline rushed through me, I felt this weird, pulsing warmth spread across my chest. My laughter sounded different, almost… deeper. I shrugged it off, trying to brush away the lingering heat in my veins. Cody looked at me with a raised eyebrow, his own face flushed, but he seemed more amused than anything.

“Did you hear that?” he asked, smirking. “You sounded like a full-on dude-bro.”

I laughed, though the laugh rumbled deeper than I expected. “Hey, you did too, bro.” The word slipped out easily, like second nature. It felt strange, yet also oddly natural, and Cody didn’t seem to notice or mind. He just grinned and shrugged, looking almost proud in a way that felt… new.

We walked hand in hand into the next room, where mannequins lined the walls, each dressed in a golden soccer jersey. They were posed as if frozen in the middle of a game—muscular arms flexed, powerful legs braced for action. The figures looked so lifelike that I almost thought they were breathing. For a moment, I felt something in me stir, a strange sense of admiration and envy. These mannequins looked strong, confident—everything I wasn’t. Cody seemed just as transfixed, his gaze lingering on the broad shoulders and chiseled forms of the mannequins.

The silence was abruptly shattered by the blare of a whistle from above. Both Cody and I clapped our hands over our ears, groaning at the piercing sound. “Man, that’s intense,” Cody muttered, his voice sounding… different. Lower, more solid. I glanced over, my eyes widening slightly as I noticed his jawline looked more defined, his cheekbones sharper in the dim light. It was as if his face had taken on a rugged, more mature edge.

“Did you… did you do something with your hair?” I asked, half-joking, though a small part of me wondered if I was actually seeing things. He just chuckled, brushing off the comment, but I noticed him roll his shoulders back, as if feeling the weight of his own frame differently.

Moving into the next room, I felt my own body tingle, a subtle hum of energy that made me feel… stronger? The dim, eerie lighting made it hard to tell for sure, but I could swear my own shoulders looked broader, my chest more solid. I took a deep breath, feeling my shirt stretch slightly across my pecs in a way that it hadn’t before. A flicker of excitement bubbled up in me, unexpected but welcome.

“Come on, man,” I heard myself say, my voice carrying a hint of confidence, maybe even cockiness. “Let’s keep going. This place is kinda awesome.” I felt a strange sense of pride just being here, like I belonged in this place. Cody nodded, and for a moment, he looked at me with something like admiration in his eyes. It felt… good. Like we were equals in some unspoken way.

The next room was pitch black, except for a spotlight illuminating a pair of cleats on a pedestal. Voices whispered all around us, chanting “Golden Army… Golden Army…” over and over, echoing in my mind. The words seemed to sink into me, filling me with a strange warmth and pride. I wanted to be a part of this, to belong to something powerful and unbreakable.

The chant grew louder, and I felt the muscles in my body tensing, like they were coming alive. Cody grabbed my shoulder, giving it a squeeze, and I could feel the strength in his grip—a grip that felt more solid than it had before. His eyes met mine, and for a brief moment, it was like we were connected on a deeper level, bound by something unspoken.

“Golden Army…” he murmured, almost as if the words were a prayer, a mantra we’d both known all our lives. It made sense. We’d always been part of this, hadn’t we?

By the time we moved to the next room, we both felt different—stronger, bolder. A large mirror covered one of the walls, and I caught my reflection. My shoulders were broader, my shirt tight against my chest, showing off a physique I knew I hadn’t had when I walked in. My arms were thicker, veins standing out faintly beneath the skin. I glanced over at Cody, who seemed equally transformed. His posture had changed—more confident, almost cocky, and his arms looked… huge.

“Whoa,” I said, though the sight didn’t alarm me. It felt… right, natural. I flexed my arm, watching the way the muscle moved under my shirt. Cody did the same, his eyes lighting up with pride. We looked at each other, sharing a grin that held more than a hint of competitive energy. “Looking good, bro,” he said, punching my arm playfully.

“You too, man,” I replied, my voice carrying that same pride. It was strange, but it felt like I’d known this version of Cody forever. Like we’d been teammates, brothers on the field, for as long as I could remember.

The next room was a replica of a locker room, complete with golden jerseys hanging neatly in open lockers. Each jersey bore a different name, but I felt drawn to a specific one, like it was calling me. The name on it read “Jake.” Cody seemed to gravitate toward a different locker, his fingers brushing over a jersey labeled “Dan.” We exchanged a look, a silent understanding passing between us. Without hesitation, I pulled the jersey off the hanger and slipped it on. It fit perfectly, hugging my chest and shoulders like it was made just for me. Cody did the same, pulling his jersey over his head and smoothing it down over his muscled torso.

For a moment, we just stood there, taking each other in. We looked like different people—no, like the same people we’d always been, just… more complete. More right. The jerseys felt like they belonged on us, like we’d been wearing them forever.

Suddenly, a towering figure in a golden jersey stormed into the room, barking orders at us like a drill sergeant. “You boys think you’re Golden Army material?” he growled, his eyes intense and challenging.

“Yes, sir!” Cody and I shouted in unison, our voices filled with pride. We didn’t even think about it—the words came naturally, with conviction. We felt honored to be here, like we’d earned our place. I glanced over at Cody, no longer thinking of him as my boyfriend but as Dan, my teammate, my brother on the field. And I knew, deep down, he felt the same about me.

We marched into the final room together, feeling powerful, unstoppable. Every step was steady and assured, each movement purposeful. I glanced down at my arms, now sculpted and muscular, veins prominent under the skin. Cody looked just as transformed, his once-slight frame now radiating strength and confidence. We weren’t the nerdy couple who’d walked in just an hour ago; we were Jake and Dan, proud members of the Golden Army, ready to crush it on the field.

As we left the haunted house, the cold night air hit us, but it didn’t faze us. Our only thought was that we were here, together, as teammates, as brothers. The last remnants of our old selves faded, leaving only pride, loyalty, and an unbreakable bond. All that mattered now was the team, the game, and each other.

#golden army #thegoldenteam #golden team #male transformation #soccer tf #jockification #male tf #jock tf #gay #halloween tf

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kiwi · 3 months ago

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I love Joe Cool Cat!! Question: did you use a particular pattern as a base or follow any specific set of design principles?

omg thank you for letting me talk abt puppets, i have been rabid

i followed this video to make the head shape and mouthplate (joe cool cats head is just flatter than the example, and i shaved down the jaw mouthplate a bit so that he has sort of an overbite, which left room for me to add fangs)

youtube

for the rest i winged it! its all stuff i found around the house so some of the materials arent ideal. the skin is felt which doesnt move well and makes him kinda stiff, so next time i definitely want to try fleece or fake fur

however the felt worked really well for the hands! its two flat hand shapes sandwiched together with a wire skeleton in between so theyre posable, like kermit the frog's. if you plan to make posable fingers though you should really use armature wire instead of random wire lying around like i did :( one of his fingers is broken already but it had a great grip before it busted. his other hand isnt attached to his vest at all, the fingers are just strong enough to hold it on his own! this leaves space for movement as the middle of his arm flaps around and makes him more lifelike

his body is just a simple rectangle of fabric made into a tube (like the sleeve of a shirt) and his arms are attached by safety pins so that they can be removed and replaced. the pins are hidden by his vest, which is also detached so that it can move naturally and allow for repairs. i learned that by looking at the notes from the jim henson team on display at the puppet museum in atlanta! :•) definitely a must visit if youre able

design wise, hes based on the vibes of the band The Stray Cats, especially their songs Stray Cat Strut and Nine Lives. id like to add more patches and buttons on his vest (the little pin he's wearing is made by covering a sewing button with fabric). the vest itself is a single piece with holes cut out for the arms because i was not about to follow a clothing pattern

things i would replace or do differently next time:

- more flexible fabric on the head. stiff felt doesnt work well!

- use stronger wire specifically meant for posing in the hands

- make the arms a little shorter and attach the pole by the wrist instead of the elbow. i wanted him to be kinda long and skinny but overdid it, and i thought i was clever by making the stick come out of his elbow. his movements look cool but hes tricky to maneuver, especially when trying to raise his hand to his face (arms too long and the stick often gets in the actual puppeteer's way)

- try using a little less hot glue and a little more sewing for ease of movement and repair

anyway yeah ive been super into learning about this stuff lately and im working on a blinking puppet next! i might be doing a small puppet show next month if i finish the other members in joe cool cat's band. if anybody has questions or wants to talk puppets dont be shy pls! im already talking my roommates ears off about it lol

#puppets #joe cool cat

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girldriveroscar · 2 months ago

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Parasocial Oscar and Landoscar analysis ahead u have been warned.

Contextually, 2020 Oscar was finally pushing open the door to the world of F1 as a potential driver (Mark Webber management, Renault Sport Academy, Eurocup Championship, etc.) and that fact combined with still being a schoolboy, surrounded by mates who actively followed his career and were his personal hypemen definitely made Oscar a bit of a hotshot to gossip about. Sure, he's kinda a nerd who games and races but also he's got great grades and a pretty girlfriend and he's coworkers with max fewtrell, best friend of emerging F1 heartthrob, lando norris, so really the cards were lining up in his favor. And yet none of that success (both socially, as it appeared to his peers, and personally, career-wise) went to Oscars head. Rather, he oozed this dorky endearing confidence that planted the seed of cool self-certainty that'd follow him into his F1 career. I mean from the very start, we can witness how Oscar took everything in stride, building a strong sense of self over easily inflating his ego.

This got kinda long so the rest goes under the cut for organizing sake!

Then, observing his Prema years, Oscar was newly thrust into a whole new team vibe. And in response, he outwardly tried time and time again to be a team player with the hazing/embarrassing bits (insert multiple clips of him dancing and singing despite initial hesitation, easily accepting very personal race vlogging into his daily regime, making hundreds of silly gifs for every occasion (heavily encourage everyone to take a look bc there's genuinely so many))

NGL watching Prema vids was what initially helped me understand Oscar better/made me like him bc we get the most clear display of his lack of ego. There seemed to be a general understanding coming out of this content: the media took an exorbitant amount of energy and wasn't at all conducive to developing his racecraft. buuuuuut regardless Oscar maintained an attitude of these people are my closest thing to family out here, they care about my wellbeing and my success and god damn it if they wanna take photos in matching Christmas PJs then hand over the damn PJs. And that was all of course bolstered by his growing success and notoriety on twitter. Just as he'd established a strong sense of self from the very start, now his public identity took it's shape in a way that felt honest and lifelike <Insert Clip of Angelina pointing out his messy clothes and Piastri Shrug>. He managed to carve out a niche amongst the Prema cast and it's not that he needed to be funny but if people memed him and laughed then hey if it gets me popularity I'm all for it.

Honestly when people dog on Oscar, saying he's got no personality it makes me crazy because it's the total opposite! I think the charm in observing his growth from Renault Academy to Prema to F1 is catching how quickly he established an unchanging confidence in not only his racecraft and wheel knowledge but also in his personality- and how that personality shines through in subtle ways. When Lando does his negging, everyone just heard Oscar sing for the first time in McLaren, am I a funny teammate, Oscar takes it in stride. He doesn't blush, nor take insult, because he has no complex - he's confident about who he is, even if people don't find it amusing. Oscar knows he's not too shy to burst into song, it's just that there isn't anyone who needs him to, so why should he? He knows Lando doesn't think he's funny, but it's not like he was trying to be anyways, so what's it matter? On the flip side too, the rare times we get an outward expression of his confidence are GEMS. The Pool Promo, where he *unprompted* shows off with a trickshot and wins, THIS VIDEO where he eggs on Lando to call lies on his confidence, calling out Carlos/Lance when they interfere with his driving, does it please you greatly that you've won before Lando, is max the best driver on the grid, the whole cricket video, etc etc.

(LOL because I write about fashion outside of this blog and someone might appreciate the connection, in my brain I kinda liken Lando and Oscar's respective confidence to loud/quiet luxury. Lando's a OOAK Hot Pink Birkin and Oscar is a Helmut Lang black slack lolol) (Not a diss btw both items have social connotations/importance that we could unpack for hours but I digress. this point is additionally funnier because id trust lando to know loewe while gucci and supreme are definitely the limits of oscars fashion insight)

I digress I digress I digress. Going back to the Prema assigned humiliation rituals. In a way I think Oscar's ethos regarding embarrassment/lack of ego heavily simplifies down to this story. His mom goes on to explain how after winning an award she gave him a big kiss in front of the whole school and, contrary to how most kids would be embarrassed or angry at the sudden loud affection, Oscar just brushed it off like no matter! "He's just resigned to it" <- literally the most OP81 psychoanalysis of all time thank you Nicole Piastri. For Oscar, the implied embarrassment he should be feeling does not register, as he simply receives love without any grievances, and hasn't the mind to worry how everyone else perceives this exchange. I swear I have a point pls stick with me. So, reiterating, this is the Prema treatment, sitting in front of the camera, Oscar resigns to producing content that's at least moderately enthusing because at the end of the day, the love for his team and the people he's working with is what's worth sacrificing mystery or "cool-ness" for. And even that's a bit of a misstep because I don't think he views it as a sacrifice so much as 'being perceived' doesn't fall on his radar of important things at all. Which! is what makes Oscar SO effortlessly nonchalant in an objectively cool way! (like this is where the more surface-level likening to Kimi Raikkonen <certified Ice Man> comes from) (The real Oscar freaks know he's not any cooler than his indifference and he's actually an incredibly endearingly awkward guy. He just doesn't take himself too serious, idk you get it.)

Now continuing down this timeline, F1 Oscar, who's got exponentially more eyes on him and a humongous team of people who's names he is still learning- comparatively, who is the one guy he can definitely remember the name of. In this transfer of teams and people, all this “I love you even if its kinda objectively embarrassing for me” energy Has to go somewhere and where else would it go than the one guy who’s name he can remember; the one guy in the same exact position as him; the one guy who he’s followed and idolized since 14! YEAH YEAH. And now Lando himself is hardly an extrovert like Oscar’s old prema friends/coworkers, so instead of yes I'll do a stupid dance so you can have good content and make your job easier Oscar -Acts of Service- Piastri has kinda got the most easy job in the world of loving Lando —I just want to make eye contact and know you hate/love this as much as I do— Norris. Like they genuinely match each others freaks in the sweetest introverted mutually beneficial way.

When you really dissect Oscar's Prema content, he’s equally expressive to everyone! He stares holes in the heads of Fred/Logan, doubles over laughing at Arthur/Robert, blushes over Angelina's teasing; it's a sanction of his care and attention divulged to each person in his sphere, one slice of the Oscar cake. Now take Lando? He's been treated to the whole Oscar Cake with a side of ice cream and a cherry on top. Like imagine if you had 10 glasses of water and you poured all of that water into one glass. Suddenly it’s overflowing and there’s water all over the table and the mess is apparent to everyone and the waiter is bringing over towels and someone's grandma just fucking slipped in the puddle and there's a baby crying and- right? right. Oscar’s love language that was distributed across an entire team of people now has nowhere to go but Lando. And not only is it love in respect to the game, it's I've known you years before you knew me, I fell asleep to your voice, watched you grow into the man you are today type love. Oscar is folded at the waist drowning Lando, staring at him with the force of 10x one man's ration of love and we are all god's honest witnesses! Yea no wonder he want that cookie so effing bad tf!!!!!

And it’s such a compelling dynamic because Oscar has been ready to transfer that quiet affection since the very beginning (had old pics of Lando on his phone up through his first year of F1 rightttt right) and since the start of it all, we just get front row seats to Lando reacting to this unconditional respect/love. WHICH IS EVEN GREATER FOR THE FREAKS AND THE WEIRDOS BC LANDO IS SUCH A WEIRDO AND HIS COMPLEXES TOWARDS OSCAR ARE SO COMPLICATED. Basically like. idk. I love when they beef bc Oscar is like I love u I love u I love u and landos like idgaf I’m cheating on u actually no I’m sorry come here I will give u silly nicknames reserved for only me to call u, but actually fuck u and ur talent I’m not spraying u w champange but also oh my god I’m a mess come be freaky w me about it,,,,, the put Lando Norris in a scenario versus his own mind agenda is great. (Bringing back the og tag to just say not ln4 hate, i just like to observe him like a bug in a jar and shake the jar hard bc he is a millionaire and my silly wabbit who I experiment on) anyways. Yea. Lando is complex. Oscar is cool bc he doesn’t care if he is cool and yet simultaneously he's so uncool bc having a crush on a guy for 8 years before being his mclaren arranged failhusband has never been easier nor sexier. OKAY. NO MORE. for now.

#woke up with even more to say this is too long I'm so sorry #did someone say parasocial?#ln4 meta #op81 meta #814 meta #landoscar #lando norris #oscar piastri #essays

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