#lib nico

[jeanniecrush]

LIB Nico Moodboard 🎬

Face Claim：Mario Ermito

[lilmeowmeowsagelesath]

Blaze | Nico | Danny

Kieran | Zayid

[redspacewriter]

moodboard: nico tarantelli

“if slowing down means getting to marry you— i’ll do it.”

[jackal-202]

Sorkin when I get you

[cupidbedsy]

𝗳𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗶𝗿𝗹 | 𝘯𝘩13 ♔

➪ summary: in which y/n has a huge crush on nico and lets it slip during a couple of interviews or 2 interviews where y/n talked about nico and 1 interview where he spoke about her

➪ warnings: gross foods, gagging/throwing up

➪ word count: 2.4k

➪ file type: fic

➪ sunny's notes: the first ever nhl fic i posted on tumblr. this holds a special place in my heart <3 thank you for everyone who has been here from the beginning (editing this was rough)

© cupidbedsy (sunflower-lilac42) ; do not copy, repost, or translate my work and designs on any other website or here

nh13 masterlist || nhl masterlist || taglist || navigation

⟹ Interview One: Jimmy Fallon - Mad Libs Theater -> reference video: mgk mad libs

“Welcome back, I’m hanging out with y/n y/l/n! Her new album is streaming everywhere, Apple Music, Spotify, you name it. Uh, y/n I want to do something fun with you and act out a dramatic scene, but first, we have to fill in the blanks. It is time for Mad Lib Theater.”

The intro of Mad Lib Theater plays and y/n readjusts herself on the seat to look at Jimmy, “Alright. So here’s how this works. I’m going to ask you for some silly words - nouns, verbs, adjectives, et cetera - and they’ll all be written onto our cue cards here, as we’re doing this. And then we’re gonna act out a dramatic Mad Libs scene. Are you ready for this?”

“Thank god I went to fourth grade.”

Jimmy laughs along with the audience and uncaps the marker, “Okay. Here we go. I want a noun that starts with a C.”

“Candle.”

“Candle’s good. Adjective.”

“Sweaty.”

“Type of bug.”

“Mosquito.”

“Animal.”

“Elephant.”

“A chain restaurant.”

“Chipotle. I used to work there.”

“Chipotle?”

“Yeah.”

Jimmy continues, “Noun.”

“Jersey.”

“Like New Jersey or a sports Jersey?”

“Oh, uh New Jersey.”

“A kitchen appliance.”

“Spatula.”

“A plural noun.”

“Buildings.”

“Sophisticated.”

“I know right.”

“Another animal.”

“A yack.”

“One of the Seven Dwarfs.”

“Dopey.” She looks into the audience and winks.

“Celebrity name.”

“Sabrina Carpenter.”

“Name me a number,”

“13.”

“Just 13, 13-”

“1386.”

“Type of profession.”

“Hockey player.”

“Hockey player? Okay.”

“Wow! Speed round. Here we go. Another plural noun.”

“Mooses?.”

“Uh, okay. Body part. Watch it.”

“Elbow.”

“Phrase that you would say if you bumped into Leonardo DiCaprio on the street.”

The audience starts yelling, lots of fans of y/n knowing how much she loves this movie as it takes her no time to come up with an answer, “Why did you let go, Jack? You should have stayed on the door. You should’ve got on the door.”

“Why did you let go, Jack? There was room for you on the door.” Y/n repeats herself for the man as he writes down her answer. 

“Another noun.” Y/n’s flustered, “You do this one.”

“Burrito.”

“Burrito, okay.”

“Type of drink.”

“Bloody Mary.”

“Another celebrity.”

“Elizabeth Olsen.”

“Verb ending in i-n-g.”

“Slaying.”

Jimmy busts out laughing, “Slaying. This is fun doing Mad Libs with you.”

“What would you shout if you sat down in a wet seat?”

“Fudge that’s wet.”

“‘Fudge that’s wet?’ I love you.”

“First concert you ever attended.”

“Madonna.”

“Wow. Madonna. You know what, that makes sense.”

“A professional athlete.”

Without any hesitation, y/n blurts out, “Nico Hischier.”

“What?”

Y/n hides her increasingly growing red cheeks, “He’s my favorite hockey player. He’s the captain of the New Jersey Devils.”

There were some hockey or Devils fans in the crowd and they let out a couple of cheers. Jimmy wiggles his eyebrows at the girl before continuing, “Another verb ending in I-N-G.”

“Blushing.”

“Yes, very good. You’re blushing right now.”

Y/n laughs, “Two words that rhyme.”

“Swiss. Kiss.”

“A long, silly word.”

“Iridocyclitis!” A man shouts from the audience.

“What?!

“Is that a disease? Is that an actual-” 

“Yeah, what is that?” 

Jimmy attempts to spell out a word. 

“Iridocyclitis. Yeah, of course. Alright, now, we’ve filled out the words for our scene. Good look to our cue card. So sorry, Roman. Are you ready to perform our scene?”

“I don’t know now.”

“Let’s go, let's do this.” 

『••✎••』

Jimmy and y/n stand on the building after coming out in superhero costumes, “Am I green?”

“No, yeah, you’re green. Yeah, you’re green. I’m red.”

“Candle girl! What are you doing here?!”

“Oh, hello, Captain Stinky.”

“Please call me by my nickname, Mr. Mosquito.”

“I’m here for the same reason you are here - to rescue the elephant stuck on the roof of this Chipotle.”

“I knew there was trouble tonight when I saw my signal in the sky- a light projected in the shape of… New Jersey.”

“Well, using our powers this rescue should be simple. I’m faster than a speeding spatula, and everything I touch turns to buildings.” Y/n says before Jimmy responds, “I have the agility of a yak. And when I get really dopey, I turn into Sabrina Carpenter.”

Y/n starts laughing, unable to control herself, “Wow. I must tell you, my back story is complicated. When I was 1386 years old, I was… I was once bitten by a hockey player.” 

She then spits out more laughter and doubles over to hold her stomach, “Oh my- Oh my god. And ever since, I’ve been able to emanate mooses from my elbow.”

“Why did you let go, Jack?” Jimmy holds his hand out before y/n places her own on his shoulder, “I know. It’s amazing, but with great power comes great burrito.” Both of the two laugh before controlling themselves and continuing the scene. 

“Your story reminds me of my own. I became a superhero after I fell into a tub of radioactive bloody Mary. But listen. We must complete this rescue. In the trapped elephant’s collar, there’s a USB drive that contains images of Elizabeth Olsen slaying.”

Y/n snorts and covers her mouth quickly before laughing, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I thought it’d be much worse.”

“And as a warning, I do have one weakness.”

“What is it?”

“Madonna.”

“That’s okay. Just remember what Professor Nico Hischier told us. He said if we’re ever in a situation like this,” Jimmy pulls out a gold button, “You press this button, and we will both immediately start blushing. Here we go.”

Y/n laughs and the two start slapping their cheeks for them to redden, “Our blushing is causing the elephant to be saved.”

She looks at Jimmy and then the cue cards and shakes her head, “Swiss kiss! We did it!”

“Yes, let’s high-five and say the secret superhero catchphrase on ‘three’. One, two, three.”

They both squint in an attempt to read the word, “Iri-dira-calaptus.”

“Dude!”

“Yeah!”

“And scene!”

The two laugh as the scene ends and Jimmy tries to get his words out, “My thanks to y/n y/l/n.”

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

⟹ Interview Two: James Corden - Spill Your Guts or Fill Your Guts -> reference video: sygofyg w/ ewan mcgregor and niall horan

The theme music plays as the camera cuts to James, Ewan, Niall, and y/n sitting at a table with a rotating top and a bunch of food laid on it.

“Okay. so let’s take a look at the food that we have here.” James proceeds to spin the top of the table to showcase the food, “We have a salmon smoothie. A beef tongue.”

Ewan sticks his tongue out and makes a noise causing y/n to laugh as she holds her napkin up to her face, “This is disgusting.”

“Bird saliva.” The audience yells in disgust and Niall makes a whiffing motion with his hands, “The smell just gets stronger and stronger.”

“A scorpion. Fish head. Hot sauce. “

“Is that safe to do hot sauce?” Ewan asks as he looks towards James, “We’re gonna find out.”

“And finally, bull penis.”

“Yay!” Y/n claps. 

“So here’s how this works. Ewan and I will be asking questions to Niall and y/n. Now if someone on your team chooses not to answer their question, you both will have to eat the disgusting food. Have we got it?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay, Niall-” y/n cuts in quickly, “I’m already mad.”

“You’re up first. Niall, I am going to give you-”

Niall points to one of the foods, “Please don’t do that. My acid reflux will freak out.”

“Please don’t. Not the scorpion.”

“The salmon smoothie.” Y/n squeals. 

“Here is your question, So if you answer the question you don’t have to eat, if you don’t answer the question, you both have to have a big glug of the salmon smoothie.” Niall laughs, “I don’t know what I’m more nervous about, the question or the smoothie.”

“Well, I’ve just seen the question and I think it might be the question. Niall, who is your least favorite member or One Direction?”

Niall swears but the bleep covers it as he goes to clink smoothies with y/n. Y/n looks at him, “I think you should drink, I am not your publicist, but I don’t know that you should.”

“I think I might just take the daily mail hit tomorrow, and throw out a crap answer. I’m trying to help y/n.” The said girl laughs and hits him, “If it’ll help you out, I’ll drink it.”

“Don’t think of your teammate, think of your life.” 

“What do you think, Niall are you going to go salmon-”

Y/n places the napkin around Niall’s neck to make a bib, “Yeah for future life, yeah, I think I will go with this.” The two pick up smoothies and drink them, well attempting to drink them. 

James hands them spoons and they both put them in their mouths. Y/n immediately gags and goes to spit it in the trash, getting some in her hair. James and Ewan immediately burst into laughter as they watched the two. 

Ewan looks at y/n, “Are you alright?”

“It is not so much the taste, it’s the texture. It's like having salmon yogurt.” James looks at y/n, “Oh and there is some in the hair to keep for later. Right, so now y/n, you will ask your question to me.”

“Oh well, well, well.”

“Which would you like me and Ewan to have?”

“Have a look at the question first.” Niall leans over to help y/n, it was honestly like having a brother and sister team up against someone. 

“Oh, wow. Getting tactical.”

“Oh, he is going to eat. I know– Scorpion.” Y/n turns the table so the scorpion sits in front of the two men on the other side. 

“Scorpion. I think that is the easiest one.”

“Well, yeah, you say that until it is in your face.”

“Your question is, James, name one artist who you have turned down for carpool karaoke.” The crowd lets out a bunch of oos, “How long have you got?”

“Cheers mate,” James cheers with Ewan, and they eat the scorpions, seemingly without any problem. 

“What is y/n going to eat?”

“I think I’m going for the tongue.” 

“And it’s one each. You have to eat the whole tongue.” Y/n looks at him in disbelief and he just shakes his head, “I’m just kidding.”

“Oh, this is quite a cute one. Y/n you once said you had a favorite hockey player, Nico Hischier, is it true you might have a crush on the Swiss man?”

Y/n immediately blushes and places her head in her hands as everyone laughs, “Oh come on, this is an easy one.”

“Oh shit.” The bleep censors the word as y/n looks at the tongue, “Yes, it’s true. I do have a crush on Nico Hischier.”

The whole crowd goes wild and Niall playfully hits her on the arm, “Niall what would you like to give Ewan?”

“Ewan you’re up. Truthfully, all I’ve been thinking about is that saliva. Surely the question gets better.”

“It does. Sorry, boys.”

“Jeez, again, back to the bird saliva.”

Y/n looks at the boys, “How do they get it?” James and Ewan playfully try to mimic what they think happened.

Niall pulls out the card and y/n reads it, immediately bursting into laughter, “This is the greatest question ever.”

The Irish man looks up at Ewan with a grin on his face, “Ewan, have you ever shit your pants?”

Everyone laughs uncontrollably for at least 30 seconds, “The show is only an hour, Ewan.”

“I mean I could lie, there is only one or two people that would know.”

“I am really enjoying this.”

“Well, I guess, yeah.”

“Hang on, wait how old were you?”

“Well, I was very young at the time.”

“No, no there didn’t have any age in there, did it?” Ewan defends.

“Well, we’ve all technically shit our pants as babies.” Y/n looks at the man. 

“That is all I was referring to. I might have shit my pants in the 90s one time.”

“Ewan McGregor. Spilling it.”

“Okay, Niall I am going to give you guys.”

“Please not the hot sauce.”

“Some beef tongue, are you ready? Okay.”

“I’m going to have to eat this, aren’t I?”

“Niall, you have dated both Selena Gomez and Ellie Goulding. It is your last night on Earth, who would you rather spend it with?”

“Just it doesn’t hurt anyone.” Y/n says, “Y/n’s going ‘it doesn’t hurt anyone’.”

Niall places his arm on the girl’s chair, “I’m afraid it does, love.”

“The trouble is, it’s not really your last night so someone’s gonna be upset tomorrow.”

“Okay, I would, 'cause it’s the last night on Earth, Ellie is a big fan of Planet Earth by David Attenborough so I would sit and watch that with her, and for that reason, Ellie Goulding.”

“Y/n it is your turn, you now will ask me a question and select a food.”

“You know what, you guys seem so keen on the beef tongue, giving it to us time and time again, so we will get revenge. James, you are definitely going to eat that, so have you got your knife ready.”

“Yup.”

“Which Late Night Host do you prefer, Kimmel or Fallon?”

“That’s tricky. Oh, dear are we eating this?” The two bite into the tongue and y/n gags as she watches them. 

“That was Spill Your Guts or Fill Your Guts. Big thanks to Y/n Y/l/n, Niall Horan, and Ewan McGregor, we’ll be right back, everybody!”

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

⟹ Interview Three: Nico Hischier - Postgame Interview

“So Nico, I hate to ask you about this but there have been these videos floating around about y/n y/l/n talking about you, have you heard about this?”

Nico nods his head as he looks at the interviewer, “Yeah, actually I have. Jack actually showed me this video and let me tell you, that was the last thing I was expecting.”

“Everyone is dying to know after she came out and explicitly stated that she liked you, do you like her, or at least have a tiny crush on her?”

“Yeah, well you know, I haven’t actually met her so I can’t say I like her but I do think she’s cute and that’s all I’m going to say about this.”

The interviewer nods, “Thanks Nico.”

[toskarin]

my curse is that I actually really enjoy those nico-style jcore shitpost songs where the joke is that they're bad and full of incoherent ad-libs that don't even really work as denpa. keeps the mind sharp. keeps the soul alert.

[inneedofsupervision]

Roll Call

Summary: Hajime is making his daily roll call when he notices that one of the Inmates of Cell Thirteen is missing. It is always troublesome dealing with them, and the prison director doesn't know what will happen if he gets his hand on Number 15 when he finds the teen. But he can promise one thing. Inmate 15 will regret running away again. (Re-upload) (also edited)

Lee! Jyugo / Ler! Hajime

"Cell Thirteen, roll call!"

Hajime walked over to unceremoniously knock with the back of his hand against the heavy iron door before promptly kicking it open. Black boots stopped in front of a heap of bodies lying motionlessly on the ground. His eyebrow twitched in annoyance, and he kicked against the nearest person, earning a tired groan. The pile of libs twitched and began moving.

"Number 69!"

"Yes, yes. I'm awake. No need to scream like that."

The tall young man with the number 69 tattooed on his forearm rubbed the sleep out of his eyes before getting up from where he had been lying. The man walked past the door, mindlessly raking his fingers through his colorful mess of hair that could rival a bird's nest.

"Fix your bed hair," commanded Hajime, fist clenching when Inmate 69 rolled his eyes at his words. Deciding to not waste more time on the American, Hajime continued the most disliked part of his morning routine.

"Number 11!"

"Huh?"

A blanket gets shoved to the side, revealing the face of Inmate 11.

"Oh, hi Hajime," said Uno, not bothering to get up. He threw the prison director one of his trademark smirks as he began brushing his hair. Hajime's eyebrow ticked in annoyance as Inmate 11 began braiding his hair in insouciance as if owning all time in the world.

Hajime just rolled his eyes and continued.

"Number 25!"

"Mhhh?"

The teen branded with said number was still lying on his futon, not moving an inch.

"Stop sleeping!" Hajime was growing angry.

He stomped into the cell, ignoring the protest of Inmate 11 as he kicked a bunch of the blond's hair products to the side to slap the green-haired teen on the back of his head, which made Number 25 finally open his eyes.

Inmate 25 blinked slowly before his eyes focused on the bald man.

"Ah, it's Hajime-chan," chirped the teen with his usual cheerful voice, suddenly full of energy, which made the man roll his eyes. It's always the same with these idiots.

"Only one is missing," thought Hajime, taking a deep breath as he couldn't catch a glimpse of Inmate 15.

"Number 15!" he called out.

The three other cellmates continued their morning routine, not minding the man who checked under every futon and even under the sink, his expression turning sinister with every second he couldn't find the teen.

"Number 15!"

He scanned the cell with his eyes, frustration growing.

"Ah, you're searching for Jyugo?"

Rock turned around, catching Hajime going through their heap of dirty clothes piled in a corner, now furiously checking everywhere for the youngest inmate.

"I woke up in the middle of the night, and he wasn't there. He might have sneaked out in need of a little midnight snack? Did you check the canteen already?"

"You're the only one here who would break out for food in the middle of the night, Rock." Uno laughed and playfully slapped the taller man on the back. The blond wriggled his eyebrows, a playful smirk growing on his face.

"I bet he sneaked out to see a girl~."

Uno clung to Rock and made some silly kiss movements in his direction, which made the purple-red-haired man snicker as he playfully pushed Uno's face away.

"I don't think that Jyugo would break out to meet someone. Maybe he wanted to get some new manga?" Nico grinned brilliantly as he shared his idea. The other two wore thoughtful expressions as if actually considering that nonsense as possible. Hajime clenched his fists, a vein popping out on his forehead, feeling the rage boiling in him as he listened to the pointless chatter between inmates 69, 11, and 25.

"How can you all be this dense?" he asked, shaking his head. He tramped over to the door before turning around.

"Seitaro will take you to the canteen while I search for your stupid friend. If one of you decides to try something funny, then you can prepare yourself for a punishment. Am I clear?"

"Yes!"

Uno, Rock, and Nico answered quickly, swallowing aloud as Hajime threw his infamous death glare at them.

"I hope Jyugo will be okay," said Rock, flinching as the door slammed shut with a bang. Nico and Uno could only nod in silent agreement. Hajime could be very scary when he grew angry.

In the meantime, the man had reached the control room.

"Supervisor! Inmate 15 has escaped again!" cried Seitaro, who had been waiting for him and was close to bursting out in tears as he ran up to his chef. Hajime rubbed his hand over his face, done with all the commotion. Couldn't he have one single morning where everything follows the routine? He sat down at the desk where a wall of monitors was set up, eyes scanning over them. The digits of the alarm clock above them go up, reminding them that they earned another minute with one of their inmates missing. Hajime banged a fist onto the table, a cup with stale coffee cluttering at the power he hit the desk.

"Seitaro!"

"Y-Yes, Supervisor?" asked the younger man, straightening up at the sharp call of his chef.

"You go bring the inmates from Cell Thirteen to the canteen. I will find Number 15 by myself."

"Yes, Supervisor!" cries Seitaro loudly and salutes. He nearly stumbles while hurrying out of the room to fulfill the orders. Hajime sighed again. Days like these made him question if it was worth the trouble. He considered calling the prison directors of the other buildings to inform them of their runaway. He quickly decided against it. Scenarios of what he would have to listen to if one of the other directors would catch his Inmate, Number 15 of all people, run wild in his head. He would be reminded of it at every meeting. The director's face pulled into a grimace. Dealing with these idiots of Cell Thirteen brought nothing but headaches and masses of paperwork. Hajime deactivated the sirens. The sound didn't help his growing headache. The man sighed before checking the cameras. It didn't matter how much security feed he skimmed through. Number 15 was nowhere to be seen. If Hajime wasn't so pissed, he might have been impressed by the sixteen-year-old for breaking out of his cell with such ease. He puts his hat down and runs a gloved hand over his head in thought, trying to think of where the teen could have disappeared.

His head tilted as a weird noise reached his ears. Turning in his chair, Hajime raises an eyebrow.

"What are you doing there, Kuu?"

The feline in question, which had been scratching at the door leading into the break room, stops to meow before trying again to get into the room.

Hajimes frowned when he stood up and walked over to the door, wondering why his cat would want to go there. Kuu had never shown interest in the break room before. Opening the door, Hajime is greeted by darkness, which Kuu doesn't seem to mind as the cat strides between his legs into the room, heading for the direction where the bed for the staff stands. Hajime was about to turn on the lights when something made him stop mid-movement. It was the sound of soft snoring. His eyes narrowed.

Turning on the lights and stepping into the room, the prison director of Building Thirteen had to take a deep breath, refraining from throwing something as the fury was about to boil over. On the bed right in front of him laid Inmate 15, whom he had so furiously searched for just seconds ago, sleeping peacefully. The vein on Hajimes forehead grew before he stomped over to the sleeping teen and promptly ripped away the blanket Inmate 15 was clinging to.

"Hmm, it's cold," muttered Jyugo when he suddenly got pulled out of his sleep by the feeling of cold air hitting his skin. His hands searched for the blanket but stopped when they couldn't find it. Mismatched eyes opened only to look right into Hajime's angry black ones.

"Oh, hi Hajime," muttered the still sleep-drunken teen, not sensing the dark vibes that evaporated from the jailer. He lazily rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, blinking as a gigantic yawn passed his lips.

"Don't "Hi" me, you idiot!" shouted Hajime, promptly kicking the drowsy teen from the bed.

"That hurt!"

"I hope it does."

Jyugo pouted as he sat up and rubbed his side where the kick had hit him. Hajime glanced over his shoulder at the clock display, eyes narrowing. He couldn't believe how much time he had wasted on this idiot already.

"Stand up. We have to bring you to the canteen, although I doubt you earned a breakfast," retorted Hajime, waiting impatiently for the teen to move.

"Don't wanna," said the black-red-haired boy, who was now sitting cross-legged on the ground, pouting. "I'm not hungry."

"I don't care if you don't want to or not. You gonna move your ass. Now!"

"I don't care if you care or not," remarked Jyugo, squinting at the man.

Hajime clenched his fist. Jyugo looked up when he noticed a movement, and his stomach tightened when he saw Hajimes expression as the man stalked over to him with his fists tightly clenched. The teen instinctively moved backward, only to jump when he felt the cold stone wall of the room pressing against the thin fabric of his clothes. He should have refrained from provoking Hajime, aware of the man's remarkably short temper, but now it was too late. Jyugo might be the best at breaking out of jails, but out of this situation, he couldn't escape. He should have kept quiet for once. Jyugo swallowed as Hajime came closer. When the director stood before him, his boots only inches from touching his leg, the boy couldn't help but squeeze his eyes shut in fear of a strong punch awaiting him. And so his surprised yell was even louder when he suddenly got thrown over a board shoulder.

"If you don't want to go, I will make you."

Jyugo, who was still too shocked from being suddenly carried like a sack of potatoes, needed a few moments before he started squirming in the director's hold.

"Let me down!" protested the teen as he struggled and kicked in the hold. Hajime grimaced at the screaming and cursing next to his ear but continued walking down the corridor, not giving a damn about the kicking and protesting inmate hanging over his shoulder.

"Hajime," whined Jyugo after noticing that shouting didn't help and tried to pray the arm and hand off. He despised the thought of Hajime carrying him to, and even worse, into the canteen. He knew that the man would even go as far as to only let him down when they arrived at their table. Jyugo could already hear the teasing he would receive for it, causing a dark blush to creep up his neck to the tip of his ears. He had to get Hajime to let him down, and that fast!

"This isn't funny, Hajime! I mean it. Let me down!" cried the teen, and his struggling increased again as his frustration grew with every step the guard made.

"You bought this on yourself," reminded the man coldly, which led to Jyugo angrily hitting with his fists on his back while chanting, "Let me down, let me down," and kicking his legs.

"God, can't you just stay still for a moment?" asked the taller man and tightened his grip around the teen's waist just in case but stopped in his tracks when he felt the small body on his shoulder jump at the touch.

Jyugo managed to hold the squeal in when a finger dug into his sides, and he quickly muffled the sound by pressing a hand over his mouth.

"Number 15?" asked Hajime when the struggling, hitting, and shouting stopped abruptly, and the body on his shoulder stiffened. A frown appeared on his face at the lack of an answer. Hajime loosened his hold around the teen's waist, lowering him carefully to the ground.

"Are you injured?"

"N-no," answered Jyugo while avoiding eye contact, causing the man's frown to deepen. The prison director of Building Thirteen took pride in controlling his strength. The more it confused him how the teen had reacted when he fastened his hold on him. The kick from earlier couldn't have caused such an injury, and Number 15 also wasn't one to hold back complaining if something bothered him. The teen hadn't said anything about being hurt, causing Hajime to grow frustrated with not knowing what in the world caused that violent flinch.

"And what's with that jump just now?" asked Hajime, clearly not believing the boy, a bit suspicious about No.15 unusual behavior.

"It was nothing. Didn't you want to bring me to the canteen? Then let's go," tried the teen to change the subject, and was about to go when a hand gripped his wrist and held him back.

"If you aren't hurt, why flinch like that? If you are injured, we're going to the prison doctor," said the man and was about to drag the teen in said direction when Jyugo began to protest.

"I don't need to go to the doctor. I'm fine!"

Hajime sighed at the stubborn teen before he stopped and turned around. Number 15 had the nerve to glare at him.

"If you don't want to go to the doctor, fine, but I will not let you out of my eye without checking if you are unharmed. I am obligated to prevent you and your cellmates from getting harmed. If there is a suspicion of injury, I must act on it."

"Why aren't you believing me? I said I'm fine!"

Jyugo had almost been touched by Hajime's words, not used to the man talking this openly about trying to keep them from getting hurt, if it weren't for the fact that the man was still about to look at his waist, undoubtedly needing to touch him and thus exposing his until now, well-kept secret.

He tried making a dash for it. He must have given away his idea somehow, as a pair of arms blocked his way before he could do one step. Jyugo's eyes widened, and he tried to stop from running straight into Hajimes arms but failed spectacularly. In his attempt to slow down, he stumbled over his feet, falling face forward, and crashed into a muscled chest.

"You are not making this easier on yourself, Number 15."

With these words, Hajime pinned Jyugos wrist with one hand against the wall behind him and promptly started to strobe the teen's body in search of injuries or bruises.

"Hey, get your hands off! You cannot just touch me. That has to be against more than one law."

Hajime stopped at that, glancing down at the teen, almost impressed. The corner of his mouth pulled up.

"You are right about that," he calmly stated.

"Then get your hands off me, you perv," growled Jyugo, waiting to be freed, only to stare shockedly at the man as the other just kept going.

"What are you doing? You just said you're not allowed to do that!"

"In case of allegedly keeping weapons, Guards have the permission to search inmates at all times."

"Weapons? I don't have any weapons on me," protested the teen, not believing what he just heard. "That's a bad excuse!"

Hajime ignored his protest and continued looking for hidden injuries, not caring for being called out on him, bending the rules as he pleased. Meanwhile, Jyugo had to bite his teeth together so he wouldn't make any telltale sounds. His jaw clenched, and his body was tense as a bowstring as the finger fluttered over the soft textile of his uniform. It came close to impossible as his upper ribs, sides, and the front of his stomach got thoroughly prodded and touched. If Hajime found out that he had flinched because it had tickled, then Jyugo was sure he would die of embarrassment. No one knew he was ticklish, and Jyugo would like to keep it that way. It was already hard enough to avoid getting involved in the tickle fights that seemed to break out permanently between the other three members of their cell. Jyugo knew that he would be screwed when his cellmates found out just how ticklish he was.

So, one could imagine why the teen wasn't eager for Hajime to find out about his little secret first. It seemed he didn't have to die jet as Hajime looked to have finished his examination. Jyugo relaxed and noticed that he had been holding his breath the whole time the older man had looked for bruises or broken bones.

"Ah, wait, I haven't looked at your lower ribs yet," said the taller man. Before Jyugo's brain registered just what came out of Hajime's mouth, fingers were softly digging into his sides and lowest rib. The teen couldn't suppress his body from violently flinching away. The tiniest giggle escaped him, and Jyugo prayed to God above that Hajime didn't hear it, but luck wasn't on his side today.

"What was that?" asked Hajime, surprised. He looked at a now furiously blushing Number 15.

"N-nothing. You're done with examining me now, aren't you? No weapons, no injuries, or whatever you searched. You can let me go now." During his nervous speech, Jyugo had pulled at his wrists to underline his point.

"Did you just giggle?" asked Hajime, who didn't let himself be fooled by the younger man and poked experimentally at Jyugo's side.

"Come on, Hajime, let me go. There is no point in STOP IT!"

Jyugo shrieked and tried to bend his body to the side as the older man playfully poked his sides a few times, trying everything to avoid the hands. Hajime's lips curled into a sly smirk as the realization hit him.

"You're ticklish."

Hearing these two words was enough to drain all color of Jyugo's face. It got worse when he registered that it hadn't even been a question. Hajime knew. Their director knew he was ticklish. It would only be a matter of minutes until everyone would know.

"Oh my god."

The whimper came over his lips before he could stop it. The paleness got chased away as a bright red blush crawled onto the teen's face.

"That's what you have been trying so hard to hide, huh?"

The tone in the director's voice sent shivers down Jyugos spine, and he knew by the gleam that was glinting in the man's eyes that he was screwed.

"Me being ticklish? No, that would be way too childi-hmpf!" Jyugo had tried to play the question off with a sassy remark but barely managed to hold in a high-pitched squeal. Hajime pulled his hand away from where his pointer had reached out to poke the teen in the middle of his stomach.

"What's wrong, Number 15? Are you certain that you're not hurting anywhere? Maybe I should look at your ribs again to make sure?" asked the prison director with mock concern before he pretended to check Jyugo's ribcage. He poked and prodded between the sensitive bones, making it difficult for the black-red-haired teen to hold still. The higher the fingers wandered, the more Jyugo twitched and squirmed under the touch, tightly pressing his lips together, trying to prevent the giggles from revealing his poorly kept secret. He was so embarrassed by this whole situation. The teen couldn't give Hajime the satisfaction of breaking him. When Hajime reached his highest rib, the teen couldn't help the snicker that made it past his lips.

"Hmm, did I find a bruise here? Let's better check that, right?"

Hajime would never admit it, but this little discovery of Number 15 weakness is entertaining him immensely. With a grin, he wiggled his fingers at Jyugos outstretched armpit. At this point, the professional jailbreaker couldn't hold it in anymore. Bubbly laughter sputtered out of him like water without the fingers even touching him.

"Not ticklish. Of course, that's exactly what not ticklish looks like."

Hajime smirked, switching places and tickling the young teen's unprotected tummy. Jyugo's knees bucked under him, his legs barely holding his widely squirming body upwards when he threw his head back, loud childish giggles and shrieks escaping him.

"Nyahahah, Hajihihimehe don't," cackled the young man as fingers dug into the soft sides of his stomach, sending ticklish sparks through his body and making him jump as they hit a sensitive spot. He had a lot of those. Jyugo pulled at his wrist, trying to lower his arms and protect himself from the tickling. Once again, he had to accept that their director would always be the stronger of the two whenever it came to bodily strength. The man was just too strong, and Jyugo couldn't do anything but laugh and contort helplessly when Hajime mercilessly attacked his upper body with tickles.

"Don't what? I thought you weren't ticklish," mocked Hajime, smirking as he pinched the spot right under the teen's armpit and over his highest rib, which made Jyugos legs give in. He was now only being held up by the Hajime's grip on his wrists.

"Nahaha Hajimehe I-I canahahn't," whined Jyugo through his laughter and chortled as fingers started wriggling in his outstretched armpit before they wandered down and gave his hipbone an experimental squeeze. The teen nearly kicked Hajime against his shin at that.

"I hope you learned your lesson for breaking out of your cell and sleeping in the night duty room again," said Hajime calmly while reaching for the teen's leg, giving his knee some good squeezes, which made the boy scream in laughter.

"YEHEHEHES. I-I PROHOHMIHIHSEHE! NAHA, STOHOHOP PLEHEHE."

Jyugo couldn't even finish the sentence anymore. Tears of laughter started gathering in the corner of his eyes while his body twitched and bucked under Hajime's touch.

"You're sure?" asked Hajime, teasing the teen to ensure he learned his lesson.

"Yehehess!" was all the cackling boy could bring out between shaky giggles before the other finally let go of him. Jyugo tiredly slid down the wall, panting hard as he wiped a tear from his cheek.

"You nearly killed me," complained the panting teen as he glared tiredly at the guard.

"That wouldn't have happened if you would sleep in your bed. At the next roll call, I don't want to see you anywhere except your cell. Did I make myself clear?"

The guard turned his head sideways as the corner of his lips turned up in amusement. He had never seen Number 15 like this. The teen was thoroughly spent, head resting against the wall with his eyes closed, almost as if he was ready to go back to sleep. Jyugo gave him a tired note, too drained to verbally answer.

"That's how one gets to shut you up, huh? I need to remember that. Get up now. I won't listen to your complaining about getting hungry later when you missed breakfast."

At that, Jyugo lifted his head, a challenging gleam in his eyes.

"I could break out and get myself something to eat any time of the day."

He regretted the words as soon as he said them, as the next moment, he found himself back on Hajime's shoulder.

"Hajime, let me down! It was a joke! Seriously, let me down. Hajime, please, they will make fun of me!"

"You should have thought about that before being mouhty."

"Hajime!"

Hajime shook his head at the protest. God, how he hates roll calls.

[andromedasummer]

Hello, I just saw an ask you sent abnerkrill about f1. I'm very new to the sport (I'm on s4 of Drive to Survive and have just begun following the current season), and doing some research into f1 history for a project I'm working on. Do you have any resources on the history of f1? And do you know where I can find the Senna documentary? No pressure to respond, of course, and thanks for sharing your insight in that ask.

Hell yeah I can help! DTS is docudrama which means it will make a storyline outta nothing, so you've probably been given a very warped view of the sport. Which isn't to say it isn't good fun! Its just not helpful to understanding the sport.

I've been into motorsport coming up on 4 years now and I've read/watched a bunch on the history of F1 and motorsport. I'll list some of that stuff here:

MY RECOMMENDATIONS:

One: Life On The Limit (documentary)

Free on youtube. Interviews tons of drivers. Got me into the sport. I mean it when i say it interviews a ton of old drivers/important people from multiple eras and paints a real picture of the danger of the sport. Fair warning: it contains footage of fatal crashes and if you find that upsetting I totally understand and won't blame you for skipping it

Lauda (Documentary)

Eveyone should know about Niki. I say this half-ironically. Hes my fav driver so I'm biased but his impact on the sport cannot be overstated. His story, from his championship to his horror crash and full body burns to his next two championships and his fight for driver safety is incredible. He was half of the pair that organized the famous driver strike! Whole grid locked themselves in a bedroom instead of driving to protest the lack of safety!

Rush (Movie)

Again Niki Lauda related, however this is THE motorsport movie. It's very accurate to the battle between James Hunt and Niki Lauda for the championship, along with their friendship. It's great and even non-motorsport enjoyers loved it.

Biographies/Auto-Biographies (Books)

Tons drivers have tons, some have multiple (like Senna or Schumacher) and you can get the more well known ones from the more well known drivers off Z-Lib or annasarchive pretty easy (use a vpn and go to r/piracy and navigate to their masterpost of piracy links. if you dont have a vpn dw they list a really solid free one) you should also be able to find a host for the senna doco through there. I would recommend reading about figures like Prost, Schumacher, Lauda, Hamilton obvs but also non-drivers in the sport like Ross Brawn and Sid Watkins.

Life on The Limit (Books)

Two books by Sid Watkins (doctor who made f1 safe) that were released in tandem with the doco I mentioned and go into great detail about his friendship with past drivers. Really funny at multiple points and then absolutely heartbreaking when it comes to the things he saw and lost during those days. Highly recommend.

My friend Laura who has been watching since infancy also recommends:

- "In general for freebie resources, overtakefans as a site has a Ton of resources and history archived"

- "and if you search for 'F1 season reviews YouTube' you will usually find the short season round ups they used to do that provide you with some basic history and that can be really good if you want to know more about certain eras but don't know where to start."

Silver War (documentary)

It's abt nico and lewis and their lifelong friendship into bitter toxic rivalry into. whatever the fuck it is now. is on youtube, (I personally haven't seen it.)

Grand Prix: The Killer Years (Book)

About the deadly years of F1, I believe. (I haven't read it.)

Enzo Ferrari: The Man and The Machine (Book)

from Laura: "even though it starts WAY WAY WAY before f1 and is probably too heavy for a newbie to handle it is a VERY detailed look at not just Ferrari but early Motorsport in Europe and how that eventually led to the creation of F1 and why Ferrari has always been a presence in it"

The book also touches briefly on fascism in the sport which I will be talking abt under the readmore because I do feel it's an important disclaimer.

So, I put this under a readmore cos it's a bit long. But the one last thing I wanna say is that I think it is important when looking at F1 both in the current day and it's history to discuss the grim realities about why Motorsport is so elitist, and how that has been ingrained since it's founding.

A big thing to know about F1 history is that is was founded by the wealthy, juuust pre (late 1920s) and then post WW2 (paused during the war). It was the wealthy of this era who could afford to buy and race motorcars. From there, it was only those wealthy who could fund and form those teams. It was a rich mans hobby. And unfortunately, more often than not, those very rich men had fascist ideals (which were very, very popular in England and Italy and Europe in general and up until WW2 which made it a more distasteful ideal, although enough people certainly persisted with these beliefs more quietly).

Nazis raced in it. Nazi sympathizers raced in it. Ferrari had to work for Mussolini and Mercedes had to work under Hitler making weapons during the war, some members of these companies more willingly than others. Hell, one of F1s most famous circuits it raced on is the Nurburgring. A massive stretch of track that was made on the orders of Hitler, next to a small town where the small Jewish population had been purged. It was built to show off German Engineering and with the hopes to show off to the rest of the West (they lost against the English in the inaugural race and threw a fucking fit abt it loser fucking nazis).

These echoes of facism and elitism do still exist in european motorsport to this day and, like fascist ideals, have expanded into other continents. I don't think I could name a Brazilian driver who doesn't support Jair Bolsonaro. The Piquets are personal friends with him, Nelson (4 time world champ, prolific racist) drives him around for political rallies. Emmerson Fittipaldi (another old champion, Brazilian) ran as an MP for the Italian fascist party. Bernie Ecclestone (owned the rights to f1 for a WHILE) believes in fucking insane conspiracy theories about Jewish people and described Putin, who he is friends with, as a "good man" on national television when questioned abt the invasion of Ukraine. Max Mosely, who was head of the FIA until the late 2000s, was a youth fascist who handed out handwritten leaflets on "racial inferiority". His parents wedding was attended by Hitler himself. He was the nephew of Oswald Mosely, who was done for treason during the war for his loyalty to the Nazis and belief in Nazism. Max was still in charge when Lewis, the sports first black driver (one of two ever now, out of 70+ years of history), came into the sport. And that's not even going into the morality of some of F1s sponsors (Armco, etc) and the places they race (too long to list)

This is uncomfortable, yes, but it's not often talked about when recounting F1's history. Certainly not in documentaries or books. The creators of which who, frankly, dont even know how to touch on the subject or think it's fine to skip over. But it is a reality of the sport and it does intertwine in an irremovable way with its history, especially when you look at the people who both competed and still do compete. When you look at its current day classism, its racial inequality, sexism, homophobia, ableism etc.

Just because its easier to hide these days through weak statements, a stance of individualism on drivers political views and co-opting of activist language without actual moves towards change, certainly does not mean it isn't there. And while things have absolutely improved in terms of diversity and will hopefully continue to improve with the presence of people like Lewis Hamilton and Susie Wolff, F1 and European motorsport is and was unfortunately, founded in an era of fascism and elitism and it will be a while until those parts of the sport can be removed from its structure.

[driftycities]

Can we talk about the absolute SHIT SHOW LIB ended up being???

Spoilers if you haven’t completed today’s chapter:

I had two different Scarletts at my dress fitting, one of them was upset with me for some reason, and it never got resolved. The other one was my bestie, which made more sense, but still??? Why were there two of you?? The whole thing was bizarre.

Zayid cheated on Eve, which was a huge deal for about 5 seconds, then 5 seconds later they’re friends. Okay!

The wedding came out of NOWHERE. Like I cannot emphasize that enough. I felt like I barely had any time with Kieran and we’re suddenly married.

Nico wanted me to stop his wedding and run away with him - he clearly HATED Autumn but they still got married. Okay!

No explanation about the other couples - I never saw Scarlett and Blaze again, which was weird because they’re supposed to be my “best friends”. At the bachelorette party we were all celebrating how in love we are and half of them didn’t get married.

There’s apparently another chapter but I don’t know if Kieran is enough for me to finish this. This whole thing felt so rushed, it started out sorta strong but the quality diminished so quickly after that. The writing all around was eh, and terrible at the end. I had high hopes for this since Netflix was making it, but I was disappointed. Kieran was the only good thing about this entire shit show I put myself through.

[lesbiankoby]

i saw this fic where garp threatens nico robin into watching his kids a while ago and i didn’t like it from what i recall but that dynamic between garp nico robin and aokiji entrances me. need that old lib to grow on her like mold while robin has a mostly-stable seven years to properly grow up but the things and stuff happens and canon mostly progresses as it does and she will NEVER EVER forgive him for what happened to ace

if i was gonna do anything with that idea it would be 80% robin and garp anyway. need garp to show kuzon a picture of his four grandkids <3

[justaboutsnapped]

tag game time!!

thanks wifey <333 @pitayyaaa

Last song: a dagger through the heart of st. angeles by alexisonfire

Favourite colour: been digging cool red lately

Currently watching: n/a

Last movie: rewatched saw on halloween. MY homosexual titanic movie

Currently reading: binge read chinese web novels （见凶+末日乐园）that objectively have little to no substance as a coping mechanism... i got through 500+ chapters in the past two days i don't even like them that much. send help

Sweet/Savory/Spicy: savory rules but sometimes it really depends on the mood tbh. i'll eat something savory/spicy and start intensely craving sweet things + vice versa.

Relationship status: single. platonically married though (copy-pasting pandi's text because yeah <333333)

Current obsession: f1. more specifically nico rosberg. yeah. once again apologising to the prev fandom mutuals who haven't abandoned me yet you guys have incredible resilience

Last google: navajo-churro sheep (for lib class lol)

Currently working on: school assignments because this major is killing me. trying to find time to finish the damn nico rosberg gif set that i promised i'd make uhhhhh months ago

Current game: no. 1 loser thing about me: i don't game at all... no. 2 loser thing about me: technically if anything counts then my last game is the fucking bézier curve practice game

Tagging @onconstellationstreetmp3 @manykinsmen @luckysheikah @ambientoast @earthdoves if you guys wanna participate... no pressure obv

[jeanniecrush]

OMG, Nico is so hot, I am almost obsessed with this man!💋😍

[lilmeowmeowsagelesath]

Blaze • Danny

Nico • Zayid

[joseopher]

HELLO, LADIES, WORMS, HOMOSEXUALS

As we know I check the novacaine tags daily.

AND SCREAMTOBEHEARD IS BACK!!! TO BLESS US WITH A NEW CHAPTER!! AND SCREAMTOBEHEARD IS ENGAGED???? CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GO READ IT HEEEERREE: god complex

WHY YOU SHOULD READ THIS FIC:

FRIENDSHIP DYNAMICS

Sex or something?

Pathetic Callum

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY

Spoilers! Spoilers! Spoilers! Spoilers! Spoilers! Spoilers! Spoilers!

I'm serious about the spoilers, this will make no sense if you haven't read it, IT'S SO GOOD, YOU WILL LOVE IT!

We open scene!

Callum is in extreme pain and...

"He wondered if he could ask Tristan to massage his legs. He’d like him to touch and have his fingers on his skin."

And we love him for it lol

"But that would mean admitting he was in pain and after yesterday’s embarrassing fiasco, he would do anything besides admitting such weakness."

Patheticness trumps horniness!

"Callum was still thinking about massage victims when his bedroom door opened without knocking."

Callum can't possibly, ask for help, noooo he must find victims instead. Yes, yes, very normal thought Callum.

I love how he is written so much

“Wanted to check if you were breathing,”

“Disappointed by the result?”

“Terribly.”

THEM <3 <3 <3

“Good morning to you too, my love,” 

THEM BUT IN A DIFFERENT WAY <3 <3 <3

"It was interesting to know Tristan wanted his attention, in one way or another. It made denying him said attention even sweeter."

Gideon, in the last two chapters: Callum is lonely and wants someone to care about him

Callum, literally a few sentences ago: I want Tristan's attention

Callum, when Tristan gives him attention: I WILL DENY HIM ATTENTION, I AM GREAT AT THIS!

LOVE HIM LOVE HIM LOVE HIM (EVEN THO I'M LOVELESS ARO)

“Who on earth put condoms in the fridge? I thought it was one of those little jam packets at first, what the fuck. Seriously, Libs, have you seen Gid-,”

OOOO CALLUM YOU LITTLE SHIT /affec

"It would be another way to get under Tristan’s skin, which was more important than anything in the end."

CALLUM HAS HIS PRIORITIES IN CHECK

“Don’t try to make them jealous, sir,”

TRIIISSSSTAN CLAPPING BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"At least hatred was a strong emotion. Much stronger than indifference."

My boy has so much trauma, he flops around like a fish out of water

"Tristan wanted Callum Nova dead. Literally, hypothetically, wishfully. In any way there was."

My little murder child <3

"Tristan hated how the fantasies could never go without that. How he subconsciously would long for Callum’s interference, even in his homicidal daydreams."

"If you say so," he said with a wiggle of his eyebrows. Nico kicked Tristan’s shin and got up."

EVERY SINGLE FRIENDSHIP DYNAMIC IS PERFECT

"Are you influencing me right now to do this?"

Callum found a loophole. He can be horny AND pathetic at the same time!

“Yes, I’m insane, my legs hurt. Will my dear Tristan Caine please be kind enough to massage my legs?” 

HA HA HA MY BOYS

"Make him show him just how good his hands were to wipe that smug look off his face."

"He wanted to kill Callum. He wanted to..he wanted..he wanted"

"I hate you,"

"Uh huh," Callum just said before Tristan connected their mouths again." 

Then SEX!!!

I know nothing about sex because I am a sex-repulsed asexual with a low libido.

BUT I WILL READ IT FOR MY BOYS

*a few minutes later*

I READ IT!

IT IS GREAT AND SEXY! <- doesn't understand what the word sexy even means

BUT I CAN SAY THE CHARACTER DYNAMICS ARE ON POINT! AND I LOVE TRISTAN BEING LIKE "I hate you" BOOOYYY YOU ARE LITERALLY FUCKING!

"You’re never interrupting," Callum told her. He surprised himself with the truthfulness of that statement."

I LOVE THEEEEEEEEEMMMMM

"But none of that mattered more than the permanent place Reina had in his life."

I LOVE THEEEEEEEEEMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

"But now that it had actually happened, Callum wasn’t sure if he wanted to brag about it. What was there to brag about? That he had taunted Tristan until he finally broke and kissed him?"

Callum is so scared of attachment <3

"For someone being asexual and sex-repulsed, Reina had probably seen him in more stages of undress than anyone else in the palace."

For being asexual and sex-repulsed, I have probably seen him in more stages of undress than anyone else in the fandom <- rereads smutty fanfics because I NEED novacaine content no matter that I am grossed out by sex (also, like in all fics by this author, they have brilliant characters and brilliant story)

"Callum had to bite his lip to hold himself back from laughing at the way he said the instead of your. Oh, those fools."

CALLUM YOU ARE ALSO A FOOL AND NEED HELP IN THE BRAIN

“What did I just say? Go left Libby!”

“I did go left! You’re just too slow to anticipate and react to it!”

“I shouldn’t have to anticipate if you’d just listened to what I said.”

“If you’d just for one second listen to anything I’d have to say, maybe we wouldn’t be having this conversation to begin with!”

SIBLINGS! SIBLINGS! SIBLINGS!

"I don’t know, whenever someone mentions him having to interact with you he looks like he’s about to keel over." Callum refused to let that statement hurt. Even though he did. "

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWW </3

THEN SEEEEEXXXXX

Today I am going to study them like a sports commentator <- knows nothing about sports

OOOh it's a big game tonight boys! Tristan and Callum are about to have a rematch!

Last time it was unclear who won! Likely because they both need therapy!

Letss see oh, Tristan is making the first move!

But Callum makes his own move with "Did you use it?"

BUT TRISTAN IS DOING THE SEXY THINGS

NOW CALLUM IS DOING THE SEXY THINGS

AND THE WINNNER ISSSSS...

Me, who is eating garlic bread >:3

Now they are going to shower :)

“Please, dear Tristan, will you make me coffee?”

“Well, of course, your majesty, anything for you.” 

MYYYYY BOOYYYYYSSSSSS <3

SO AMAZING!!!!! FANTASTIC!! BEST UPDATE YET!!!!!! SO GOOOOD!!

[this-week-in-rust]

This Week in Rust 496

Hello and welcome to another issue of This Week in Rust! Rust is a programming language empowering everyone to build reliable and efficient software. This is a weekly summary of its progress and community. Want something mentioned? Tag us at @ThisWeekInRust on Twitter or @ThisWeekinRust on mastodon.social, or send us a pull request. Want to get involved? We love contributions.

This Week in Rust is openly developed on GitHub. If you find any errors in this week's issue, please submit a PR.

Updates from Rust Community

Project/Tooling Updates

Solving the "floating point precision" problem with... floats?

Sniffnet v1.2.0

Bevy + WebGPU

rust-analyzer changelog #182

Update-informer v1.0.0

Pavex, a new Rust web framework - #4: Performance is a feature

Opensourcing Whichlang, a fast language detection library for Rust

Observations/Thoughts

How Much Memory Do You Need to Run 1 Million Concurrent Tasks?

Open sourcing our Rust crate audits

Rust & Nix: Parallels in Complexity Management

[audio] PyO3 with David Hewitt

Rust Walkthroughs

The magic of scope guards

Mocking in Rust: Mockall and alternatives - LogRocket Blog

Compress-a-Palooza: Unpacking 5 Billion Varints in only 4 Billion CPU Cycles

Resilient LL Parsing Tutorial

ESP32 Embedded Rust at the HAL: Timer Ultrasonic Distance Measurement

A guide to closures in Rust

Guide to parsing with nom

[video] N-Queens Puzzle (PART 2) - Rust - Codurance Screenkata

Research

[video] Nico Lehmann, Flux: Liquid Types for Rust

Miscellaneous

RustConf 2023 Schedule

Crate of the Week

This week's crate is whichlang, a fast no-dependencies OSS natural language detector.

Thanks to Brian Kung for the suggestion!

Please submit your suggestions and votes for next week!

Call for Participation

Always wanted to contribute to open-source projects but did not know where to start? Every week we highlight some tasks from the Rust community for you to pick and get started!

Some of these tasks may also have mentors available, visit the task page for more information.

bilge - Allow others to define their own -Bits derives

Hyperswitch - Implement CardsInfoInterface for MockDb

Hyperswitch - Implement DisputeInterface for MockDb

Hyperswitch - Unite payment intent and setup intent in stripe compatibility

If you are a Rust project owner and are looking for contributors, please submit tasks here.

Updates from the Rust Project

314 pull requests were merged in the last week

CFI: fix encode_ty: unexpected Param(B/#1)

diagnostic: wrap parens for ref impl trait param

resolve: only disambiguate binding key during define

add --remote-time flag to curl for bootstrap

add a conversion from &mut T to &mut UnsafeCell<T>

add creation time support to FileTimes on apple and windows

add derive for core::marker::ConstParamTy

always fall back to PartialEq when a constant in a pattern is not recursively structural-eq

better diagnostic for use Self::..

debug format Const's less verbosely

do not recover when parsing stmt in cfg-eval

don't expect normalization to succeed in elaborate_drops

don't inline functions with unsized args

don't skip inference for type in offset_of!

don't use inner macro in marker_impls

dont check must_use on nested impl Future from fn

erase ReError properly

erase regions of type in offset_of!

exclude inherent projections from some alias type matches

fix dependency tracking for debugger visualizers

fix doc comment for ConstParamTy derive

fix duplicate arcinner_layout_for_value_layout calls when using the uninit Arc constructors

fix local libs not included when printing native static libs

fix overflow in error emitter

fix recursion depth handling after confirmation

fix: emit error when fragment is MethodReceiverExpr and items is empty

get current target config from --print=cfg

give a more useful location for where a span_bug was delayed

give better error when collecting into &[T]

handle error body in generator layout

improve cgu merging debug output

keep only the trait when emitting the error for MyTrait + 'a

merge return place with other locals in CopyProp

merge some query impl modules into one

move rustc_middle/src/ty/query.rs to rustc_middle/src/query/plumbing.rs

only depend on CFG_VERSION in rustc_interface

optimize next_chunk impls for Filter and FilterMap

process current bucket instead of parent's bucket when starting loop for dominators

recover impl<T ?Sized> correctly

rename {drop,forget}_{copy,ref} lints to more consistent naming

replace QueryStruct with arrays local to rustc_query_impl

shorten backtraces for queries in ICEs

shorten even more panic temporary lifetimes

specialize ToString implementation for fmt::Arguments

specialize query execution for incremental and non-incremental

support PGO on custom project

support RISC-V unaligned-scalar-mem target feature

suppress "erroneous constant used" for constants tainted by errors

use error term in projection if missing associated item in new solver

add the weak-intrinsics feature

stabilize feature cstr_is_empty

stabilize feature nonzero_negation_ops

constify slice_as_chunks (unstable)

use code with reliable branchless code-gen for slice::sort merge

ascii::Char-ify the escaping code in core

hashbrown: add NEON backend for RawTable

hashbrown: add support for allocator-api2

regex syntax: fix overflow for big counted repetitions

cargo: lints feature

cargo: pass -C debuginfo after weakening if explicitly set

rustdoc: hide repr attribute from doc of types without guaranteed repr

rustdoc: include strikethrough in item summary

rustdoc: Only keep impl blocks from bodies

clippy: add minimal_cfg_condition lint

clippy: SpanlessEq improvements

clippy: match_wild_err_arm: do not lint in const contexts

clippy: redundant_pattern_matching: check for single-arm match

clippy: dbg_macro: don't remove dbg! in arbitrary expressions

clippy: don't suggest unnameable types in box_default, let_underscore_untyped

clippy: enhance needless_collect: lint in method/function arguments that take an IntoIterator

clippy: fix invalid_regex not recognizing new syntax introduced after regex-1.8.0

clippy: fix some suggestions generated by the option_if_let_else lint

clippy: ignoring let_underscore_untyped warnings in code from proc macros

clippy: rename integer_arithmetic

rust-analyzer: consider block impls in lookup_impl_assoc_item_for_trait_ref

rust-analyzer: expand format_args! with more details

rust-analyzer: add moved-out-of-ref diagnostic

rust-analyzer: highlight used trait assoc items when cursor is on trait import or trait bound

rust-analyzer: render hover actions for closure captures and sig

rust-analyzer: support C string literals

rust-analyzer: consider all tokens in macro expr when analyzing locals

rust-analyzer: fix preorder_expr skipping the else block of let-else statements

rust-analyzer: fix evaluating negation for floating point types

rust-analyzer: handle match scrutinee in closure captures

rust-analyzer: introduce new type var when expectation for ref pat is not ref

rust-analyzer: place type inlay hints after the item and without left-padding

rust-analyzer: process macro_use prelude in semantic scope resolver

Rust Compiler Performance Triage

There were a few regressions, but most were expected, and one in particular (PR #111807) is expected yield gains in object code performance at the expense of a slight compile-time hit. There are a couple PR's that need future followup, namely PRs #111364 and #111524.

Triage done by @pnkfelix. Revision range: 3ea9ad53..cda5becc

3 Regressions, 2 Improvements, 5 Mixed; 2 of them in rollups 51 artifact comparisons made in total

Full report here

Approved RFCs

Changes to Rust follow the Rust RFC (request for comments) process. These are the RFCs that were approved for implementation this week:

No RFCs were approved this week.

Final Comment Period

Every week, the team announces the 'final comment period' for RFCs and key PRs which are reaching a decision. Express your opinions now.

RFCs

[disposition: merge] eRFC: single-file packages ("cargo script") integration

Tracking Issues & PRs

[disposition: merge] Stabilize inline asm for LoongArch64 (editor's note: "LoongArch" is not a typo)

[disposition: merge] Uplift clippy::invalid_utf8_in_unchecked lint

[disposition: merge] Uplift clippy::cast_ref_to_mut lint

[disposition: merge] Uplift clippy::undropped_manually_drops lint

[disposition: merge] Make pointer_structural_match normal and warn

[disposition: merge] [mir-opt] SimplifyLocals should also clean up debuginfo

[disposition: merge] Remove structural match from TypeId

[disposition: merge] Fix docs for alloc::realloc

New and Updated RFCs

[new] RFC: #[export] (dynamically linked crates)

[new] Generic Futures

Call for Testing

An important step for RFC implementation is for people to experiment with the implementation and give feedback, especially before stabilization. The following RFCs would benefit from user testing before moving forward:

No RFCs issued a call for testing this week.

If you are a feature implementer and would like your RFC to appear on the above list, add the new call-for-testing label to your RFC along with a comment providing testing instructions and/or guidance on which aspect(s) of the feature need testing.

Upcoming Events

Rusty Events between 2023-05-24 - 2023-06-21 🦀

Virtual

2023-05-25 | Virtual (Charlottesville, VA, US) | Charlottesville Rust Meetup

Practical Monads

2023-05-25 | Virtual (Ciudad de México, MX) | Rust MX

Proyecto "Taller de Rust"

2023-05-25 | Virtual (Karlsruhe, DE) | The Karlsruhe Functional Programmers Meetup Group

Stammtisch (gemeinsam mit der C++ UG KA) - various topics, from C++ to Rust

2023-05-25 | Virtual (Raleigh, NC, US) | Triangle BitDevs

Rust for Bitcoiners

2023-05-25 | Virtual (San Francisco, CA, US) | Data + AI Online Meetup

D3L2: Discussing Rust, Ballista, Ray SQL, DataFusion with Andy Grove

2023-05-30 | Virtual (Dallas, TX, US) | Dallas Rust

Last Tuesday

2023-05-31 | Virtual (Chicago, IL, US) | Chicago Healthcare Cloud Technology Community

Rust for Mission-Critical AI: A Journey into Healthcare's Safest Language

2023-06-06 | Virtual (Austin, TX, US) | WebAssembly and WasmEdge

Monthly WasmEdge Community Meeting - Run Rust Warp in WasmEdge -- Alan, Poon Yong Quan

2023-06-06 | Virtual (Berlin, DE) | OpenTechSchool Berlin

Rust Hack and Learn

2023-06-06 | Virtual (Buffalo, NY, US) | Buffalo Rust Meetup

Buffalo Rust User Group, First Tuesdays

2023-06-07 | Virtual (Indianapolis, IN, US) | Indy Rust

Indy.rs - with Social Distancing

2023-06-07 | Virtual (Stuttgart, DE) | Rust Community Stuttgart

Rust-Meetup

2023-06-08 | Virtual (Nürnberg, DE) | Rust Nuremberg

Rust Nürnberg online

2023-06-13 | Virtual (Dallas, TX, US) | Dallas Rust

Second Tuesday

2023-06-20 | Virtual (Berlin, DE) | Berline.rs / OpenTechSchool Berlin

Rust Hack and Learn

2023-06-20 | Virtual (Washington, DC, US) | Rust DC

Mid-month Rustful

2023-06-21 | Virtual (Vancouver, BC, CA) | Vancouver Rust

Rust Study/Hack/Hang-out

Asia

2023-05-25 | Amsterdam, NL | Frontend Developer Meetup Amsterdam

Svelte Frontend Meetup (signup required) - Building a Svelte-Rust app using Tauri

2023-06-10 | Kuala Lumpur, MY | GoLang Malaysia

Rust Workshop/Hack and Learn Malaysia June 2023 | Event updates Telegram | Event group chat

Europe

2023-05-24 | Lyon, FR | Rust Lyon

Rust Lyon Meetup #4

2023-05-25 | Barcelona, ES | C++ Programmer Meetup.

Rust for C++ Developers.

2023-05-25 | Copenhagen, DK | Copenhagen Rust Community

Rust metup #36 at Adapt Agency!

2023-05-25 | Paris, FR | Rust Paris

Rust Paris meetup #59

2023-05-30 | Barcelona, ES | BcnRust

10th BcnRust Meetup

2023-06-03 | Plovidv, BG | AeroRust

Space Conference - Plovdiv

2023-06-04 | Plovidv, BG | AeroRust

Space Conference : Nanosatellite embedded workshop

2023-06-08 | Aarhus, DK | Rust Aarhus

Rust Aarhus meetup #2 sponsored by BRØLSTÆRK

2023-06-08 | Zurich, CH | Rust Zurich

Unsafe, Miri, SIMD - June Meetup

Oceania

2023-05-30 | Canberra, ACT, AU | Canberra Rust User Group

May Meetup

If you are running a Rust event please add it to the calendar to get it mentioned here. Please remember to add a link to the event too. Email the Rust Community Team for access.

Jobs

Please see the latest Who's Hiring thread on r/rust

Quote of the Week

I guess the nicest example of this phenomenon is shared mutability. Programmers have been arguing for decades whether it is sharing xor mutability that causes memory safety bugs:

"It's threads!" – shouted JavaScript and Python, and JS remained single-threaded, and Python introduced the GIL.

"It's mutability!" – screamed Haskell and Erlang, and they made (almost) everything immutable.

And then along came Rust, and said: "you are fools! You can have both sharing and mutability in the same language, as long as you isolate them from each other."

– H2CO3 on rust-users

Thanks to Jacob Pratt for the suggestion!

Please submit quotes and vote for next week!

This Week in Rust is edited by: nellshamrell, llogiq, cdmistman, ericseppanen, extrawurst, andrewpollack, U007D, kolharsam, joelmarcey, mariannegoldin, bennyvasquez.

Email list hosting is sponsored by The Rust Foundation

Discuss on r/rust

[wistcrias]

WHEN  DO  YOU  GET  YOUR  SOFT,  ITALICIZED  “OH”?

                            ––––––                  𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐒𝐒  .        

you typically wait until the last second to believe the truth--because it would destroy you to believe it, and then find out it was a lie. you are someone who has never wanted to want, but has rarely been able to do anything else. the idea that you might have to break down your walls for the sake of someone else, someone who could easily decide they don't like what is on the other side, is harrowing. why let people get close enough to be rejected? you are enough for yourself. and you will tell yourself that every time you catch yourself staring at their mouth, smirking at their joke, finding a reason to flick their shoulder. until the kiss. that's when the flood of want, want, want bowls over you and you realize that you are torn between two ways of living. oh, you think. because despite how complicated you have made it, the moment you kiss, somehow, things seem incredibly simple. they won't be once you start thinking again, but for now, for this moment, you live in the quiet peace of revelation. oh.

tagged by.        @vanitys​ ( thank u sm love )  tagging.        @dvarapala @amillixnvoices ( vax ) @vexahlias @likedetective @beguilcd ( kash ) @magaprima and whoever else wants to!