#let's fuck up the friendship
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Fuck It Friday!
tagged by @eddiebabygirldiaz, @lonelychicago, @fruchtfliege, @diazheartsbuckley, @hemlocksandfoxgloves, @theotherbuckley !!!
so i still haven't been writing much, the drawing haze is real man but here have some of the fwb buddie fic that i'm pretty sure i've already shared so weee! see it again!
Buck did a double take when he saw the pancake mix and said, “Absolutely not. I don’t even know why you have that, Eddie. If we’re making pancakes we’re doing it the proper way, from scratch.”
“But that’ll take longer,” Eddie groaned. “I’m hungry.”
“Good things take time,” Buck scolded, before pulling out the ingredients to make pancakes from scratch.
Now that the coffee had been poured Eddie took over, making them exactly like they liked them. Wordlessly he passed Buck his coffee and Buck hummed in thanks. Eddie took a seat the table and sipped his coffee while he watched Buck move around his kitchen with ease. God, this all felt so fucking domestic and Eddie loved it.
In no time Buck had whipped up enough pancakes for the two of them and they sat down to breakfast. “So, what do you want to do today?” Eddie asked. “I have to pick up Christopher from his friend’s tonight but we have the whole day.”
“That sounds good— oh shit, I just remembered I promised Maddie we would go to lunch,” Buck said apologetically, looking at Eddie with a pout on his lips. “We’ve been so busy lately I haven’t really seen her.”
“Oh,” Eddie tried not to let any of his disappointment show. “That’s okay! You guys have fun.”
“Do you want to come?” Buck asked, pulling out his phone. “I can check with Mads to see if that’s okay.”
“No, no, don’t worry about me,” Eddie waved him off. “You two need some sibling time together.”
tagging: @bigfootsmom, @monsterrae1, @thiamsxbitch, @buckera, @devirnis
@sleepywinchesters, @queerdiaz, @queerdiazs, @spagheddiediaz, @jeeyuns
@roy-kents, @mustachediaz, @father-salmon, @underwaterninja13, @spotsandsocks
@beyourownanchor6, @maygrantgf, @dorkydiaz, @ksbbb, @epicbuddieficrecs
#let's fuck up the friendship#buddie fwb#jess.writes#my wips#buddie wip#buddie#eddie diaz#evan buckley#911#911 abc#911 fic#911 wip#fuck it friday
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all worked up with nowhere to go
alternate title: stuck in the middle with you. >:3 Asher deserves to be the jelly in a dom sandwich, okay.
redacted audio: david/asher/babe, rated explicit 18+ (read on ao3)
“Show him how much you want it, puppy.”
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A deeper exploration of what happened during 'that night'
--
all worked up with nowhere to go
“I’m all yours.”
David’s dark eyes are on him as he says it from where he’s standing in the open door of the bathroom, his silhouette backlit, emphasising the lines of him, a glittering intensity in his gaze.
They have all night. And Asher would be lying if he said he hadn’t been thinking about this for longer than he can remember - idle thoughts and fantasies fuelled by hormones, waking him up in the middle of the night with ruined sheets.
He can still feel the shape of David’s mouth against his neck, the pressure of his teeth against his skin. He wants more. He wants to taste him, to feel the weight of him on his tongue, swallow him down until he’s all he can taste, see, feel.
It comes out even without him thinking about it, “I want to taste you.”
A low growl erupts from David’s chest, deep and possessive. His gaze flickers over to his mate, a question there that is quickly answered by the curl of their smile, their fingers trailing through Asher’s hair, soothing as they tangle their fingers in the strands.
“Go ahead.”
READ THE FULL VERSION ON AO3
#redacted audio#redacted asmr#ej writes redacted#david/asher/babe#let's fuck up the friendship#david/asher#look I am still here in the ashvid agenda#this is smutty as all heck heheheh#LOOK WE GOTTA PRACTICE OKAY#ENJOY <3#mdni#writing
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i've been so used to the online space where if you like a series or fictional character that someone else hates they will openly berate you and cut you out of their life and tell you to Go Die so when i got into a thing that a friend really didn't like and their only reaction was "i do not like it" and left it at that with no over the top reaction or lecture on Why The Thing They Don't Like Is Bad, honestly i felt like i met god
#i am often reminded my irl friend group is made up of people who act like actual mature adults and every day i am so fucking grateful for it#when i see people going on like: if you like xyz fandom or character you are blocked on sight yes i will kill a friendship over this#my reaction is always something along the lines of: well okay let me just preemptively make sure you and i don't interact ever again ???#and it's NEVER THE TEENS MAKIN THESE POSTS!! WHICH IS WHAT TERRIFIES ME#it's always grownass adults that should be more concerned with idk!!! taxes!! work!! the news!!! LITERALLY ANYTHING THAT ACTUALLY MATTERS
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"You said you love me exactly the way I am"
#theres a reason im this queer /j#silly stuff pls ignore#anyway little ramble time but. i think those two clowns have quite literally given me one of the best gifts i could ever ask for#and that is community#they've given me confort. a constant source of entertainment. friendship with some of the sweetest and most supportive people i ever could-#-have met. they've given me a chance to share one of the things that give me the most joy - my art - to people that are interested in seeing#it. and people like it! people enjoy seeing my stuff for even a second! and they share their stuff with me!!!#falling in love with the daycare attendant is one of the best things to ever happen to me and i will never shut up about it#because i have never seen this much love#and i hope the universe knows how much i love it back#im gonna be an emotional mess moots pls deal with me#anyway who let me be insane about them for [checks calendar] LIKE TWO FUCKING YEARS NOW#sunshine draws#dca fnaf#dca fandom#dca sun#dca moon#beloveds#doodles#self insert#a gift for myself
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I wanted to join idk
sharing is caring ffs Riley 😒😒 (read tags psst)
#art#fanart#my art#original art#concept#bro I was like how tf do I interpret egotism and then I remembered one of the girls in my schools#such a fucking pick me and actually an egoistic ass person#she manipulates everyone and ripped friendships apart because she came in and started being the queen around#ofc she doesn’t tell me what to do. doesn’t even come close to me lol but I still hate her like respectfully just disintegrate please#so yeah let’s not say her actual mame. im gonna call her Sophia. this character is based off of her#inside out#inside out oc#onside out envy#envy inside out#envy#inside out fanart#inside out art#inside out 2#inside out egotism#Sophia actually will envy the shit out of other people bc there’s this really cool guy in my classroom and he has ONE SINGLE HOODIE THAT SHE#ALSO HAS. AND IT LOOKS BETTER ON HIM and she’s like ‘is he gay? he’s using a girl’s hoodie’ SHUT UP SOPHIA PLEASE#LMFAO#please excuse the mistakes with the spelling and stuff I’m on my tablet and it’s the worst thing ever
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kacchan there is actually a way you and izuku can be together forever i have this crazy inventive solution for you it's called a marriage license
#trust me look it up it's real#it's easy it's not free but it's worth it trust me nothing can go wrong this plan is flawless#bakudeku#bkdk#manga spoilers#mha leaks#bnha spoilers#mha spoilers#listen to me i know what you're thinking gabstar this is a shonen the only way two males can be inexplicably linked forever is a rivalry#how are we supposed to be together forever without constructing intricate rituals in order to be closer to each other than anyone else#i hear you i understand you i get you#JUST MARRY HIM ITS 2024 YOU DONT HAVE TO PLAY CHICKEN WITH YOUR FEELINGS I PROMISE ITS OKAY#hori listen to me the next chapters can just be a bkdk shoujou BL we are all seated we are here we are ready#no one is gonna complain if we're just in bakudeku making heart eyes at each other land and slowly repairing their friendship#while kacchan tries his best to convince izuku that he loves him through his actions but inevitably has to use his words to be like#LISTEN NERD I LOVE YOU CAPITAL L CAPITAL O CAPITAL V AND FUCKING E LOVE YOU GOT IT#and izuku s like did i die did shiggy kill me am i in heaven#and kacchans like FOR THE LOVE OF GOD LET ME HOLD YOUR HAND
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also also the way yeah simon and wille got to be together yeah 1000% but sara and felice!! god it’s so rare for any media to portray friendship and platonic relationships as just as important if not more important than romantic. but!!!!! they were also in that car!! they were endgame too!! it just brings me such joy that this silly angsty little romance can also put such value in friendship too <3 oh young royals writers just kill me
#that car. that last scene with car.#ofc ofc ofc them being the most adorable thing in the universe in the back#but sara and felice in the front!! sara got her driver’s liscense!! felice said fuck new york!! she had her feet up!!!!!!#and while we’re talking about yr and the value of platonic friendship can we talk about wille and felice for a moment?!?!?!!!!!#all throughout i’ve been obsessed with their friendship#i mean just look at them her looking after him through it all#even more cus they’re a boy and a girl!!! more platonic friendships between boys and girls in media!!! boys and girls can be friends#and that is just as valuable as boys and girls being in romantic relationships!!#kicking my feet over the friendships in this show on their own#let’s normalise going insane kicking feet twirling hair climbing walls gnashing at bars over platonic shit yeah mhm#young royals#young royals season 3#young royals season three#young royals s3#yr s3 spoilers#young royals spoilers#young royals s3 spoilers#kori shitposts#felice#felice ehrencrona#sara#felice young royals#sara eriksson#sara young royals
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dream and hob are really just that post that was like 'introverts only make friends when an extrovert forcibly adopts them'
#hob picking dream up by the scruff of his neck: you're my friend now and we're having soft tacos later!#that was death's goal she was like hob is powerful and outgoing enough to rope dream into a friendship. i'm sure of it#dream's never had a friend because he never approaches anyone or tries and no one approaches him because he's scary and intimidating#except hob who doesn't give a fucK!!#hob: me and the best friend i pulled by not knowing when to quit!#little does hob know once he wins dream's favor dream will never let go of his hand and be completely obsessed with him for the rest oftime#that's how it works#dreamling#i feel u dream i've never initiated a relationship ever either
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Halenthir scenario where they get married for tax benefits (in a platonic good friends sort of way) and fall in love long distance via sending each other letters with ideas on how to best leverage their marriage for tax evasion.
#Haleth has never paid taxes before moving to brethil#And is FUMING about the idea. So she sends a letter to Caranthir who mentioned something about *evading* taxes#In this setting I guess they part on good friendship terms#She visits him for a crash course in tax evading and they get drunk and someone mentions marriage giving you tax benefits#They wake up the next day and decide “you know what. Let’s actually get married for tax evasion purposes. It would be hilarious”#Up to you whether they get married in the elven way or just in the human way#Haleth fucks off back to brethil with a bunch of gifts from Caranthir like “bye bestie” and he’s like “👍. Bye bestie.”#And they strike up a proper correspondence#Because they’re married obviously#not because they’re having fun talking about loopholes in the tax code#That would be ridiculous. Obviously they are writing each other erotica.#All of Caranthir’s brothers find out because Caranthir ticks married on his tax return#Maglor voice: YOU GOT MARRIED? AND YOU DIDNT INVITE US?#Caranthir voice: It was pretty low-key. Now tell me. Did Fingolfin cry upon seeing how I leveraged my marriage for tax concessions.#Literally all his brothers: various sounds of sudden realisation this is a tax scheme#half of them don’t even believe haleth is a real person. She might have just been made up for tax reasons#Obviously this leads to a comedy of errors and classic finwean snooping#at one point Haleth hits one of Caranthir’s (half) cousins with a shovel for snooping#claims her name isn’t haleth (despite all her people calling her Haleth) and dares them to call her out on it#they can’t btw she is terrifying#silmarillion#the silmarillion#tolkien#caranthir#morifinwe#haleth of the haladin
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Overall I do think things would've gone significantly better for Martha if Donna had accepted the first offer she got from The Doctor and been in season 3. Donna would absolutely be the Number One member of the Martha defense club and would've constantly been like "SHE'S SO FUCKING COOL AND BRILLIANT AND SMART AND BEAUTIFUL AND IF YOU DON'T CHEER AND CLAP FOR HER I'M BLOWING UP THIS BUILDING" like Donna IS her living breathing hypeman. Also I think Donna would've killed the master so that whole year that wasn't? Never happened.
That being said. Rip to Martha Jones because I think she would've had a disaster bisexual moment where on either side of her is an incredibly attractive person that is ruthlessly teasing her for her crush on the other. Neither of them have figured out she has a crush on them. She is not subtle about it.
#doctor who#martha jones#tenth doctor#donna noble#tennant doctor#TO BE FAIR#i think Donna would eventually pick up on it#and she'd genuinely be so fucking nice about it#she would let her down in a way that was gentle but incredibly clear#like oh i absolutely adore you but I don't tend to feel romantically about people who are#significantly younger than me#it really is through no fault of your own im just in my late 30s#and i hope that we can still have our wonderful friendship i genuinely really love your company#whereas ten. is a fucko.
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🙊!
“I can practically hear you thinking,” Buck murmured, his breath warm on Eddie’s neck. “Are you freaking out?” “No, I was wondering what you wanted for breakfast,” Eddie said back, keeping his voice just as soft as Buck.
make me write!
#let's fuck up the friendship#buddie fwb#jess.writes#my writing#buddie#eddie diaz#evan buckley#911#911 abc#v tag#insecuregodcomplex#jess gets mail! 💌
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yes i'm rooting for m*leven breakup because byler is neat but mostly? i'm rooting for m*leven breakup for the sake of el and mike.
to me, their romance was always a puppy love born out of a combination of social pressures, naïve curiosity, and a lack of true understanding regarding intimacy and romantic love and what it really is. it was real in that they do truly, deeply care about each other and they are close friends, maybe even shared an attraction, but a maturing romance is so much more than that. they've grown up and out of being boyfriend/girlfriend, and that's okay! i think television/film needs to show more often that most of us don't have definite "soulmates" or first childhood loves that we spend our whole lives with. it doesn't mean these relationships meant nothing and didn't impact us, it just means they've run their course and that something else is in the cards, and this is part of life!
i've always felt el was at her best and most confident self when broken up with mike, discovering who she was and what she liked alongside another girl her age instead of just relying on mike for mentorship on how to live in the real world. she deserves more of an opportunity to find herself, her autonomy, and her independence, and to love who she is, and she's made it clear she's felt insecure in the relationship with mike because she isn't being loved and understood the way she wants, needs, and deserves from someone who is her partner.
also, it's okay if mike doesn't love her in "the way he should". he is not obligated to love her romantically and stay in a relationship with her just because she's a girl, because she "needed someone", or because he cares about her a lot. he shouldn't be pressured into a romance if it's not truly coming from his heart. he deserves freedom to find out and honour who he is, too, instead of just staying in his non-functional first relationship — one he got into as a child, essentially — and defining himself that way because it's what's expected when a boy and a girl are close. he loves her in some way, yes, but it's okay if he doesn't feel comfortable or secure being her boyfriend anymore, for whatever reason that is. he's felt insecure too, and that's valid and it matters.
they are their own people and are steadily growing and changing every day. they need time to figure out who those people are, and it's become clear (at least in my opinion) that those people aren't meant to be a couple at this stage.
they deserve freedom. they deserve to grow up and be authentic to themselves and not feel like they need to lie for the sake of a relationship. they deserve to move on from this version of their relationship that isn't making them happy and rekindle the best part of their bond: their strong, beautiful friendship. they don't have to be a couple if it doesn't make them stronger and better and happier people.
i think it would be healthy and wonderful for a show, especially one consumed frequently by young adults, to show a relationship starting, progressing, and ending on good terms in this way. sometimes things don't work out, and that is okay.
#eve text#elmike#stranger things#byler#only tagging byler because i feel like yall will like this take lol#tagging tagging tagging WHAT ARE EVERYONE ELSE'S THOUGHTS#god i can't believe i'm making a post about stranger things. this feels like poking a bear#i'm not particularly anti m*leven but like... they'd have to do something pretty special at this point for me to feel like it's viable#i'm seeing the bts of s5 and it's got me Having Thoughts#elmike friendship is something i am so passionate about#even before i ever liked byler (didn't ship at all until s4 even though i knew it was a thing before) i've felt this way about elmike#i always believed they were close friends at heart and needed to break up#the romance part of them felt very distinctly young and very much “he was a boy she was a girl” to me#and it hasn't deepened into anything more mature and i don't see how it could based on the current state of the writing...#the fact that lumax exists — a young relationship that is actively maturing and is healthy — makes that clear to me#and the “love confession” in s4 and how disingenuous and miserable it felt was just the nail in the coffin#also the fact that will (who is IN LOVE with mike) was instrumental in making it happen? ... uh... okay... interesting choice…#fucked up and reductive if they make it another queer unrequited love sacrifice for the sake of pushing the heterosexual agenda YUCK#so i really hope the speculation about a m*leven breakup is real!! i think it just makes sense for their characters but who knows#i don't believe in the notion of love at first sight or one true love and i think the writers don't too???#love to me is an accumulation of experiences and we inevitably choose it at some point rather than fall into it... but idk#tv is so fixated on keeping couples together... sometimes it's just not reality guys especially with young people... LET IT GO...#like i said though i'm not 100% sold that they're going to give up their “golden couple” LMAO#stranger things hasn't historically subverted too many tropes if i'm being honest#anyway i seriously need this season to come out quickly... i'm so bored and getting my master's is crushing my soul#i need frivolity#ALSO btw i won't respond to hateful messages about this so please don't bother. it's not that serious. this is a netflix show
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Hey not to be a person with opinions who sticks to them (i know ugh right) but i liked what watcher was producing. The editing was crazy good the cinematography beautiful, all things i enjoyed much more than two boys sitting behind a desk. I have adhd bitch, half the time I'd zone out during bfu cus there was nothing but talking. Aint anyone the same so don't Speak For Me motherfucker. Weird and or Wonderful is a big budget project that I love. You can love the charm of youtube videos all you want, but I can like it when shit looks fucking clean, with great cinematography, and overarching plots/ideas. I guess y'all just weren't Watcher fans. Just bfu fans. And even then i think you just wanted a friend and projected that onto shane and ryan, lol
#watcher#shane madej#ryan bergara#i liked bfu#but i wasnt gonna follow some random men online#unless i Actually Liked Their Shit#i was skeptical but man they proved me wrong and everything they've produced ove watched#EVERYTHING ON WATCHER#Multiple times#i love that channel and what i creates#NOT BECAUSE OR SORELY CUS OF THE TWO BOYS FUCK#yall are the parasocial cus i wanted this business to succeed for future artists#not to think im a third in the shane and ryan friendship#and then feel Betrayed???#when i realize we have a quid quo pro relationship with them#whoda guess#fucking hell and these are 20 year old adults acting like this#shut up you have a breakdown from a college essay#let alone running a business
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The Hazbin Graduate’s Guide to Homicide (3)
HAZBIN'S MIDSEMESTER STUDENT REPORT Student: Vox Vanhal Supervising Staff: Professor Enoch Leviathan Sponsor: Not Applicable To the Board: Vox Vanhal may be one of the most brilliant students this school has seen in decades. In all my years of teaching at Hazbin, I have never met a student more insanely ready to learn and apply their skills- due in part, of course, to said student's own possible insanity. I mean this in a jovial way, of course, but I will admit that when young Vanhal's true identity was revealed to me that my first thought was along the lines of 'is this student insane?' Whether or not my student's reason should be called into question is something myself and my fellow professor Asmodeus have discussed in length, but there is one thing that we can definitively agree on: If there is any one student in this school who I would choose to place my bets on, it would be Vox Vanhal. There is nothing more to say at this time of report evaluation. Sincerely, Professor Leviathan.
May God's blessings be with you now and at the hour of our deaths, Amen.
[ 1 ] / [ 2 ] (<- read these first for context and more murder academy radiostatic content!)
Though Alastor may have thought that Vox was much more knowledgable in how Hazbin's Institution for Homicide worked, the truth was, Vox was still fully flying on the seat of his own coattails.
He had no damn clue what he was doing still, and although it'd been two weeks since he'd arrived, part of him still felt like how he did when he'd first arrived: hesitant, scared, not knowing where to go or what to do besides the want to make his boss suffer as he killed him.
That level of animosity might sound strange to anyone not a Hazbin student or alumnus, but it was perfectly normal for any student enrolled in the academy to have such feelings. After all, there was quite a rigorous process involved in the application, and for Vox, this application process (and what led to it) was perhaps more intense than most.
There had once been a time where Vox had dreamed of becoming a Hollywood starlet, one who lit up the silver screen and was blessed by hundreds of thousands of cheering, dedicated fans who would fawn over his every move and action. He'd wanted to follow in his mother's footsteps, at one point. But after taking on his first roles in Carmine Studios, the glamour of Hollywood had shattered like fine glass.
"Miss Vesper! Would you please look over here for a second?"
"Miss Vesper, when is your next movie coming out?!"
"Miss Vesper, is it true that you and your co-star on Anna Karenina, Valentino Vega had an affair-?"
"Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck! That- fucking bastard!" Vox rushed into the privacy of his and Val's shared apartment, slamming the door behind him as he collapsed into the couch, head cradled in his hands. He couldn't even begin to start detailing the number of ways he'd wanted to fucking butcher and rip apart his boss.
Andrealphus Goetia was no stranger to the spotlight, naturally. One of Hollywood's top directors, the man had been an influential cornerstone in the history of movie-making, a real legend to light the days. But behind that picturesque platinum reputation laid a monstrous piece of shit.
It had been a complete accident that Andrealphus had found out about Vox's identity.
Vox himself hadn't even really planned out what to do about himself at that point, only that he'd known that the dresses he wore on screen were far more suited to his best friend than they were for him. Knew that the copious amounts of makeup flattened on him everyday made him feel more like a clown than a princess, that it was the most uncomfortable feeling to have to sit and play the pretty face for the audience's sake.
But he persisted, telling himself, one more year, one more year til my savings account has enough to supply Val and I with a comfortable life and we can leave.
But of course- of course Andrealphus had to ruin it for him.
The man had found out and immediately proceeded to blackmailing Vox with the information, holding things such as promotions, media gossip and rumors over his head. And now... now... Vox stared down at the script he held clutched in his hand, his knuckles turning white as he grasped it with an iron grip.
"Dieser verdammte bastard," Vox muttered under his breath.
Though he'd never loved the spotlight that came with his first taste of fame, he had loved acting. Had loved being adored for his skill, applauded for the emotions that he could evoke in crowds of people and the way he could twist people's hearts. He had wanted to be one of the best, a household name.
And now, he stared down at the script for a movie that Andrealphus knew would tank his reputation. It was absolute bullshit. The plot was held together by thin strings and a bit of glue, despite being an adaptation of one of the past decade's best selling books. Not only that, but the moment he left the safety of the apartment once more, he would also have to contend with the rumors that were steadily piling against him and dragging his loved ones and friends into it too.
All this, because Vox had refused to sleep with his shitty boss.
He could still hear the fucker's voice- come on, don't you wanna say that you got a piece of me? I'll even leave out the part about you being a transvestite, darling, just the fact that I got a piece of you is enough.
God. If only.... if only he could see that bastard's face when he crushed his fucking skull in between his hands. He wanted to see Andrealphus' stupid face contort in revulsion and terror when Vox finally did the deed, wanted to bathe in the the fotze's inbred blood. He'd do anything for the chance to just kill that piece of shit-
"Amorcito?"
Val's voice makes Vox jump on the spot, quickly shifting to hide the script from view. His friend comes around the corner, eyebrows furrowed with concern, and it's this that makes Vox break his composure, a single tear falling down his face as Val frowns, taking a seat next to him on the couch. "Voxxy, amor... tell me what's wrong."
And because he can never keep his mouth shut when it comes to his best friend, Vox tells him everything. Val nods along, pauses at the right moments, all of that stuff that friends do when they're trying to let you know that they'd rip apart your shitty boss if not for the law.
But- and perhaps this is something that Vox knew deep down to be true anyway- Val was a bit different in that aspect. He'd met the man under... less than legal circumstances, after all, and he knew that Val was the heir to quite the illustrous cartel career.
So when Valentino stops him with a firm hand on the shoulder and hands him an application paper for Hazbin, telling him to think it through, Vox barely takes even a second glance at it before filling it out.
Now, two months later and sitting in the auditorium of Hazbin's famed Music Hall, Vox doesn't find himself regretting the decision. Sure, it's a bit lonely without Val's supporting presence by his side, but the students he's met so far have proved to be some of the friendliest people he's had the pleasure of knowing: ironic, considering the kind of school they're studying at. And he's even managed to make a friend! Not that bad a start, altogether.
Vox absentmindedly doodles on the edge of his notes as Professor Leviathan's soothing voice lectures them on the importance of a proper alibi. "If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, looks like a duck, but it has an airtight alibi, it is...?"
"Not a duck," the auditorium echoes back to the professor, who nods, looking satisfied with the class's response. "So, then! The first step to alibi making is...? Miss Velvette, perhaps you'd like to answer this one for us?"
The girl sitting beside Vox shoots up in her seat, looking as if she'd just fallen asleep and was awoken by the professor's question. "Uh... the..."
After a moment of silence and stuttering, Vox takes pity on the girl, sliding Velvette over a slide of paper that she squints at before reading. "Make sure you're in a different place from the crime?"
"And how would I do that?"
"I... uh. Use an accomplice...?" Velvette stutters.
Professor Leviathan shakes his head, looking disappointed. "Not quite. One thing you will have to learn at Hazbin's is that you should never rely on any other person to carry your deed out for you. No hiring accomplices- after all, paid personnel's loyalty is shaky and they have no honor code preventing them from taking you to the police- and absolutely no committing crimes as lovers, unless you can guarantee that neither of you will be snitching. Would anyone else like to take a try?"
Vox raises his hand hesitantly. "Move the crime scene or otherwise obscure the culprit?"
Professor Leviathan snaps his fingers, "Yes! Absolutely. One of the best ways to make yourself an iron clad alibi is, if the pope is shot in the church at midnight, make sure that you are seen halfway across town in the bar at midnight; so drunk that you cannot even leave until your wife comes to pick you up at two- and no one will suspect you, even if he was actually killed right outside the pub and moved to the church instead. By moving the crime scene, you can make yourself an ironclad alibi. Obscuring the identity of the perpetrator and making it someone who couldn't possibly be you also works splendidly. After all, if the police believe the murderer to be a six foot tall adult man, then the actual perpetrator, a four foot tall young woman, would be able to pass by completely unnoticed. Thank you for that input, Vox. Now, onto the actual creation of such an alibi..."
When class ends, Vox is the first to leave his seat and head for the door, intending on leaving and getting to Track with Professor Satan as quick as possible when someone stops him in his tracks with a firm grip on his shoulder.
"Hey. Vox Vanhal, right?"
"That would be me, yes," Vox turns to face the person he's talking to, only to be met with the young woman that Professor Leviathan had called out in class earlier. "You were... Velvette?"
"Yep, that's me," the chipper young woman responds. "Listen, I know you don't know me at all, but I really need to get through this school year. Like- look, okay, I'm in a little bit over my head right now. I still want to go here and do what everyone here does, of course, I'd love to just go and plunge a damn butcher's knife into my cunt of an ex-friend's neck, but... well, you saw how I did back in class- look, what I'm trying to get at is I need someone to help me. And you're like, Leviathan's star student. So- I don't care what I have to do, I'll-"
Vox holds up a hand to stop her.
"I don't need you to do anything for me, unless you've got any tips on how to kill my boss and make him suffer during it. But I'll help you with whatever you need to study during your courses. Just..." He pauses, taking a moment to think out what he's about to ask. "Could you teach me how you did your makeup on your own?"
Velvette blinks, clearly not expecting that response. She laughs, a shrill, sharp bark and grabs his hand to shake it firmly. "Yeah, 'course I can. So, do we have a deal?"
"We do," Vox smiles. "Pleased to make your acquaintance."
#it would probably have made more sense for val to be the mean boss but i couldnt make myself go there#valvox friendship is still so dear and true to my heart im sorry villain val enthusiasts i couldnt do it#sorry andrealphus im sure youre not as bad a guy as im making you (i still have not watched hb)#there's not really much radiostatic in this installment sorgy#but on the brightside: i get to write vox and hes batshit insane and only keeping it together by the flys of his pants soo#Oh right. final thing to address voxs inner dialogue is VERY different from how he speaks proper bc hes used to covering up his feelings on#screen already so its really just like playing the role with everyone around him. but yeah he curses a lot and speaks german quite a bit#vals the only one (So Far) who he actually lets the mask down around and the relationship they have is soooorta weird cause vals gay but in#the way where he doesnt see vox as a 'real man' even tho he accepts and affirms his gender. so yeahhh thats complicated but it is the 50s#they do love each other but its not romantic. its like a qpr except one of them (val) sees it more as a lavender marriage#radiostatic#hazbin hotel#chai writes#ran rambles#EDIT FUCK I FORGOT TO TAG IT#the hazbin institution for homicide practitioners
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Jasico Bingo Challenge: Boyfriend Sweater
When Nico walks into the dining pavilion wearing a golden yellow sweater, Percy does a double-take. Actually, it’s a triple-take: first, he thought it was a new Apollo kid, then he realized it was Nico, then he realized it was Nico. Wearing a color.
Is the world ending again? Was there something really wrong with the milk in his cereal? What in the everloving Hades was going on?!
Nico sits down at table 13, unbothered as ever, and pulls the sleeves of the hoodie up. It’s way too big on him, like Big Bird shed and some poor fucker decided Nico di Angelo needed the empty muppet skin in his wardrobe.
(Is it Nico? Maybe some changeling creature kidnapped their resident son of Hades and has decided to take his place? Maybe Percy needs to go over there and test him out, y’know, knick him with some iron or something to see if he burns. If it’s an imposter, though, they’re doing a piss-poor job. Is it an intentionally bad job? Gods, it’s barely eight AM on a Tuesday, does he seriously have to go save Nico from somewhere and kill a monster wearing his face? That does not sound like his ideal Tuesday, if he’s really real. He’ll totally do it, but he won’t like it, and maybe he should start planning how to take out a creature like-)
“I can see the mountain you’re building,” Annabeth says, popping Percy’s strangely detailed daydream of hunting down and killing a weird, half-Nico, half-demon gremlin creature. He blinks the image out of his eyes and looks up at her, her hip resting against the edge of his table.
She looks amused. He squints. “Nico’s been bodysnatched.”
“Mm, no,” she says easily, with a shake of her head. “Nico’s wearing a jacket.”
“A yellow jacket.” Percy looks at the son of Hades again. He just- can’t wrap his head around it. He hasn’t seen Nico willingly wear a color since the guy was ten years old. “A yellow jacket that’s, like, twice his size.”
“It’s a molehill, seaweed brain. A jacket’s just a jacket.”
“But it’s yellow.”
“What was your nightmare about?”
Percy physically recoils at the non sequitur, tilting back in his seat incredulously. His- what? His nightmare? What does his nightmare have to do with a jacket, anyway, that’s got nothing to do with this.
He folds his arms on the table and makes a face. “That’s unrelated.”
Annabeth’s mouth raise at the corners, her eyes watching him like an all-knowing hawk. An owl, three-sixty vision and nothing but questions, who, who?
She pets through his hair and pushes her weight back up. As she draws her hand back, she taps his cheek, then his chin, and says, “just leave him alone, then.”
Percy watches her walk back to her table. When she sits, he buries his face in his arms and groans.
“Jason has also been bodysnatched,” Percy hisses to Annabeth during pottery class.
“What makes you say that.” She throws her lump of clay at the pedestal in front of her and gives Percy the same look she gave him this morning.
Percy decides to ignore that look, because that is the look of reason and he is far beyond that now. “He was wearing this black jacket with, like, skulls in hourglasses and weird skeleton butterflies and shit during Latin.”
“He is related to Thalia, you know,” Annabeth hums. She wets her hands as the plate before her starts to spin. “Maybe he’s going through the family goth phase.”
Had she not just leaned in to start forming something magical and incredible out of clay, Percy would slouch over Annabeth’s shoulders and plead with her to at least consider that something weird is going on. Maybe it’s not bodysnatchers or changelings, okay, but something is strange! Jason Grace does not just decide to wear emo shit! Jason Grace once had a panic attack because the Aphrodite Cabin stole a pair of his jeans and cut them into shorts! This is a man who has a stricter sense of style than Nico, who, fucking hell, don’t even get Percy started on that. The yellow jacket has remained on all day and it’s haunting him.
Annabeth dips her thumbs into the top of her clay and does not respond.
Percy slumps down into the stool beside hers and huffs, more for himself than anything.
Change is okay. Change is fine. But change like this, with no reason, is the opposite of fine. Change like this is a low-blow stink bomb in an otherwise perfect Capture the Flag game, impossible to get out of his clothes and his skin and his hair. Change like this is how people die.
He claws his hands up into his hair and listens to the steady whir of the pottery wheel, the sound of wet clay being molded and shaped in different ways. There’s a lull of conversation from other campers in the class, kids from all different cabins, because to them this is any other day.
Maybe this should be any other day to him, too. No, not maybe. It should be. This should be a regular Tuesday, full of regular classes with his regular friends who are ordinary in whatever ways they can be, but instead, Percy’s brain has to go and mix up everything, make everything feel- out of control.
HIs next exhale shakes too hard for his liking. His shoulders are too tense.
Beside him, Annabeth keeps calmly shaping her pot. She dips her hands into the water every so often, probably executing some flawless plan of action she drafted the night before. She’s not always delicate with her hands, with art like this - Percy knows that’s something she’s self conscious about. She never thinks she can be good at finer things.
That’s normal. That’s normal for her. Ordinary, to think that Annabeth Chase would tackle arts and crafts in the same way she would a war strategy, devising the perfect approach for a flawless result. Executing it flawlessly.
She pinches too hard pulling up the walls of the pot. It crumples, then swings off the wheel entirely with the force of it’s motion, splattering wetly across Percy’s arms and the other campers at the bench.
Percy watches Annabeth glare at her failed creation. She sticks her hands in the dirty water to scrub the clay off, wipes her hands off on her shirt, and pulls on Percy’s sleeve.
“I hate pottery,” she mutters as they rise together.
Percy grins. “I think it knows that,” he teases, and follows as she stomps toward the exit.
When the answer slaps Percy in the face, it feels more like a gut punch in the way it makes him breathless and off-balance.
“You’re…huh?”
Annabeth clicks her tongue. “You two couldn’t think of a better way to do this?” she gestures between Nico and Jason, standing awkwardly side by side as if they don’t know what to do with themselves.
They’re still wearing the wrong jackets. Each other’s jackets.
Percy makes a face, then realizes that might not be the best response to his two friends telling him their dating, so he tries to make a different face.
The world’s not ending. They’re just…together. Sharing jackets, like couples do.
“We didn’t want to make it a big deal,” Jason says. He keeps glancing at Nico and chewing on the inside of his lip. Nico, with the golden sleeves of apparently-Jason’s-jacket pulled over his hands once more, looks stubborn. Like he’s ready to fight about something.
Percy wipes his sweaty hands off on his shirt and gestures, though he’s not sure at what. “But Nico’s wearing a color?”
He feels more than sees Annabeth’s disapproving glare at the side of his head. Jason draws himself up, then seems to falter. His head cocks to the side and he shakes his head.
“What?”
“That’s a big deal,” Percy reiterates. “Nico doesn’t wear colors.”
“Nico is standing right here, wearing a color,” Nico grumbles. He shoves his hands into the pocket of the sweatshirt and gives Percy a glare that is far more familiar than literally anything else happening right now. “I’m allowed to wear whatever I want to wear, for the record.”
“But you don’t!”
“Well I do now. If you have a fucking problem with it-”
“I never said I had a problem with it,” Percy snaps back, immediately on the defensive. “I was fucking worried about you, you little shit, I thought something was wrong. I thought- I don’t know what I thought! I thought you two were swapped with some other versions of yourself, I thought you’d been- I don’t know- abducted by aliens, or fairies, or something!” He throws his hands up in the air, then drops them back onto his head, staring sort of at the middle point between the two of them. “You can’t do that shit and not expect- I mean, because, come on, guys, you’re you, you two fucking freak out if someone so much as touches your clothes. What were we supposed to think?”
The hearth crackles. It’s too pleasant a sound for the sick Percy feels.
Annabeth takes his hand, at least, and squeezes. His face burns with the shame of yelling like this, over this, it just feels so fucking stupid all of a sudden. He feels so stupid. Annabeth tried to tell him it was nothing, and he let it all get away with him, he let that nasty part of his brain win and win and win, and now he’s taking his losses out on them.
“I’m happy for you two,” he makes himself say, when no one else speaks. “I think I just also need therapy.”
Finally, Annabeth snorts. It’s a noise Percy knows, one he can ground himself with, same as her palm hot in his, her weight tilting into his side as her head bonks into his chin.
The stress he’d held bundled up in his spine and his shoulders and his stomach all day releases in an instant. He slouches back in against her and laughs against the top of her head.
“Jesus Christ,” Nico mutters, when Percy can’t stop himself, dissolving into a fit of hysterics over his own bullshit. “This is why I said we should just tell them. He’s laughing at us.”
“I think he’s laughing at himself,” Jason says. He sounds uncertain.
Percy hugs Annabeth tight, and laughs himself hoarse.
EXTRA
Nico stares at himself in Jason’s mirror, with the sweater hanging halfway down his thighs, sleeves hanging off his hands, the peak of his collarbone through the freaking collar. He narrows his gaze into a glare.
“I look like a toddler,” he says derisively.
Jason, still getting dressed himself, laughs. When he appears in the mirror behind Nico, looking far more proportional in Nico’s sweatshirt (which is frankly fucking unfair), his grin softens into a smile that’s- something. Sweet.
Nico twitches his nose.
“I look like I’m six years old,” he says, grabbing the hem of the sweatshirt and yanking down. “Why are we doing this.”
“‘Cause it’s silly,” Jason says. He presses a kiss against the side of Nico’s head and hugs him loosely from behind. “You don’t look like a baby, either. You just look your age.”
Nico looks down at himself. Maybe there’s a point there, a point to be made about how he dresses for practicality, dresses to blend in, but never to express himself. Maybe there’s a point to be made about how his discomfort isn’t really for how he feels about this, but how he thinks others will feel about it.
He tugs at the hem again, and looks back up. Jason’s eyes in the mirror are bright, as if taking in the sight of Nico in his hoodie like this is something to savor.
Nico likes when Jason looks at him like that. He likes how it feels to be looked at like he’s attractive. He likes how it feels to be wanted.
“I guess,” Nico concedes, leaning further back into Jason’s chest. Immediately, Jason’s stance is more solid, sturdy, holding them both up as easy as breathing. He holds Nico like it’s a promise that he’ll never let go.
He looks at the pair of them in the mirror, a cohesive unit rather than two separate halves. Jason in black is definitely something Nico wants to see more of, especially with the way Nico’s clothes fit snug over him, just a little tight at the biceps and chest. He looks good, not that he doesn’t look good otherwise. Different.
With Nico his contrast in yellow…maybe it isn’t so bad. Maybe he likes being the counterbalance, even.
Jason squeezes him again. Those damn eyes in the mirror are making Nico too warm, like his stomach is full of hot jell-o.
“Okay, fine, let’s do this,” he huffs. The difference in his tone must be audible, though, because Jason perks up and grins, his eyebrows up, face aglow. Nico can’t look at him for too long. It’s still strange knowing he can make someone feel like that. He doesn’t know what to do when Jason turns the full puppy-love thing on. “And stop looking at me like that, you’re going to give me cavities.”
“Okay,” Jason says in a voice identical to his expression.
Nico grabs his hand and squeezes it twice.
Jason squeezes back, so tight it aches. Nico’s heart swells with bright affection.
Alright. Maybe yellow isn’t so bad, actually.
#jasicobingochallenge2024#boyfriend sweater#fanfiction#okay so this is mostly actually about Percy and Annabeth BUT BUT BUT. it's the Jasico that matters.#Jasico is the heart of it the crux of it.#so it still counts#I think Percy has a lot of trouble dealing with things that he doesn't perceive as normal from his friends#I think the switch really fucked with him in that regard#He feels like if all of a sudden the people he knows aren't doing the things he knows them to do then maybe he's losing his memory again#maybe something fucked up has happened and he hasn't realized it yet#maybe nico wearing yellow signifies he's grieving because the last time Nico's style drastically changed overnight was when his sister died#i think percy is also WAY too attuned to Nico in general when it comes to his own mental health#I think he immediately jumps the gun on ANYTHING NIco is involved with (hence him immediately arguing when Nico assumes wrong)#I think he and Nico have a fucked up weird friendship where they both hate that they need to know each other the way they do#idk. Annabeth and Jason are holding Percy and Nico's leashes while letting them meet in the most controlled of dog parks#Percy bites first but Nico bites harder kinda deal#ANYWAY#pjo#jason grace#nico di angelo#percy jackson#annabeth chase#jasico#percabeth#hoo
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... Made myself legitimately, physically sad thinking about Kory's place on Earth post NTT /in modern comics generally.
#i have so much catch up to do#but from what i understand/ have seen?#she's either still on whatever incarnation of Titans but like. babysitting. or in TT's Titans generally being ignored#or in RHATO where you could argue she finally snapped but honestly its not even the same character#and it's just ... so sad?#i genuinely hope there's stuff I'm missing and will find out later#because she has no family on Earth except the Titans and it feels like they all either died or moved on#and maybe she's working with the next gen#but who gives a damn about her as Kory?#it makes the writing between her and Roy in RHATO that much worse#because yeah he SHOULD have been fucking worried when she showed up claiming amnesia#and lets be real its not like she's getting respect on earth- dc wont let her#Koriand'r#there's at least a decent friendship with Vic in JL Odyssey from what i remember#but like#... i hope she gets better than i think she does
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