#let’s just say…. Eliot Fucked Up Big Time

[bunnykitty13]

sorta cleaned up a doodle from earlier this year as a cool down from comms …. back to my melodramatic furry oc roots

[thirteenashmctrash]

okay so i have gained a new species of spore for my collective brainrot and i have found the perfect selling pitch to drag everyone i care about down with me. if you know the show this is hilarious. if you haven't watched it pay attention:

the show's called leverage. you know how there's those crime serials that aren't good at all but we've all watched a little too much of at least one of them even though they are blatant copaganda which is morally terrible? take your favorite one of those, but remover the copaganda. all the characters are criminals but their only victim is capitalism. every cop in the show is stupid at best and blatantly corrupt to a disgusting level most of the time. there is just as much genuine and intelligent social commentary as this premise demands.

i sense i already have you hooked. i can make this better. stick with me for a minute on this: the character dynamic is a muppet movie but also the Scooby gang

stick with me here!

You have Parker, who fit into the Scooby gang as Scooby and would be played by Gonzo. her crime thing is that she is a cat burglar and she is very good at it. her skill with it is borderline slapstick (hence Scooby) and she is very autistic coded and misunderstood (hence Gonzo)

You've got Eliot, who is the Shaggy and is played by Sam Eagle. He is the brute force of the team and he wants you to think he is all serious and grimdark. but he loves making the employees and victims of their capitalist targets aware of unions and he is a big himbo. i say he is shaggy because he plays Parker's straight man, he has the second most cartoonlike abilities, and he has a passion for cooking

Hardison is Velma as played by Kermit. he is a geeky hacker with a passion for orange soda and he is the heart of the team. he gets overlooked as leader even though he is the driving force of everything they do. like Velma. he also has that trademark Kermit brand of slapstick and deadpanned humor in balance.

Sophie is Daphne as played by miss piggy. she is basically the world's best grifter, she usually the front man interacting with the target the most. she has that crazy streak and the self defense capacity that miss piggy and Daphne (when she's done right) both have. she also has the confidence and style.

Nate is Fred and he is the human character. Fred has "let's split up gang" and Nate has "then we have to steal *fill in the blank with something comedically unfit to finish the sentence*" Fred and Nate are both flat characters with the main trait "i think I'm the leader but my smart friend does all the work" and the main interest of "trapping and screwing over capitalists" he mainly gets to call himself the leader because he's the idea guy and he has an apartment. his role in the muppet analogy is the peak of my pitch if you're still here. because while this is definitely not the Christmas Carol, Nate is the human character because he is Ebenezer Scrooge if instead of being a capitalist, Scrooge was an alcoholic and instead of character growth he was just steadily losing his mind. his moral compass and general intelligence are on a roulette wheel that is spun at random intervals lasting from seconds to the occasional few hours. also he and Sophie have divorced parents of grown children syndrome and the other three are said children. in vibes, of course, they aren't actually related.

if anyone stayed with me through all of that you should seriously watch it. even if i sound like i pulled this all out of my ass. it's so good.

it's an actively anticapitalist, copaganda free crime show where you get to see fun characters beat up every thing bad in society and fuck it all over. it balances fun comedy and wild characters with serious topics and moments in a way that is very natural and genuine. it also has one of my favorite autistic coded characters, a positive and healthy relationship that develops in a way that feels natural to the characters (as well as a rockier one if you're into drama) and it is in the midst of what looks to be an actually well handled revival series with the original cast. i haven't caught up yet but I'm so excited for it. the original had 5 seasons and the revival is waiting to be renewed for season 3.

please go watch leverage. it's so good and it deserves more fans. also i want more fic and that next season

[fixated-on-something]

I think about the magicians too much so here are some of my favourite quotes

Silly ones

Julia and Quentin: DO WE NOT AMUUUUUSE?

Julia: We made up that dance and it was TERRIBLE!

Quentin: oh god

Julia: It was so.. white.. and BAD.

Penny: I like your sweater

Quentin: Are you saying that to be cruel?

Penny: No. I like your sweater, I saw no reason not to share

Quentin: Well then, shall we go fuck some shit up?

Penny: Yes.

Margo: Yes.

Eliot: Yes definitely. Definitely yes.

Penny: Agreed. Feelings are bullshit.

Alice: Is that a traveller thing?

Penny: It’s a hearing voices thing

Alice: Well at least it beats whatever you were snorting

Penny: Marginally.

Kady: Ok, Mindslut?

Quentin: I don’t know you EITHER, except that we just summoned a killer MOTHMAN from another WORLD!

Marina: Did you figure you wanted to learn magic at your blow dry last week?

Penny: You’re welcome. (Blows kiss)

Quentin: What does that mean????

Quentin: you really don’t have to try to make me feel better we basically just met

Eliot: Well, I bond fast. Time is an illusion…

Eliot: How about I find you, and I don’t say magic is real, but I do seduce you and so lift your spirits that life retains its sparkle for decades…

Quentin: …yeah that sounds nice thank you

Dream Alice: If you would shut up for 2 seconds this sex dream could pass the Bechtel test, Quentin

Eliot: Once one of them offered to blow me for a spell. It was barely worth it.

Quentin: Is someone being creepy on purpose?

Margo: that is…. Not super consistent with the books

Quentin (genuinely very distressed): no!!! It’s not!!!! And I find that devastating!!! ☹️

Quentin: You can’t possibly want to be a dick more than you want to live!

Eliot: Oh yes very pristine, it’s been taken over by a kiddy diddling mutant.

Penny: The hell are you drinking?

Alice: I don’t know- triple sec?

Penny: What did Quentin do.

Margo: So we are fucked without grease

Quentin: Sounds like us

Eliot: Must be a Monday. Onward to glory.

Penny: Whoa WHOA WE ARE NOT. NOT. Killing a U.S. senator. But we will commit a felony… almost as stupid.

Eliot: IHEREBYDECREE! Rulers… done gonna rumble.

Margo: Ps we still hate you, but it’s the 21st century it shouldn’t be this hard for a girl to get an evil demigod abortion.

Niffin Alice: what’s this bitch doing in my room?

Margo: By agreeing to marry a stranger on the spot?

Eliot: I did it!

Margo: That was different.

Eliot: You’re right. This would only really be equivalent if Ess was a girl, and you found pussy you know, interesting in a ‘sometimes you like Thai food’ kinda way and now it’s all Thai food forever TILL YOU DIE.

Eliot: Hooolyyy shit the walking plot twist returns

Penny: Hi I need something

Eliot: Shocker. Hey Fen look it’s Uncy Penny! That’s right, I knocked her up. No big deal.

Penny: Uh- congratulations?

Eliot: like I needed more people calling me daddy but yes, thanks, we’re… thrilled.

Eliot: I am in way over my head. I’m not even in control of which of my bodies is awake and my sexually aggressive wife- she could wake me up at any moment in Fillory and-

Fogg: There are certain student teacher boundaries which I prefer not to cross.

Penny: “Let’s go hunt the white lady?” People like me get SHOT for saying shit like that.

NOW THE HEART SHATTERING ONES

Eliot: Do you think it’s real?

Quentin: Some of the good parts have to be. At least I hope so.

Eliot: Things aren’t usually worth caring about

Margo: Eliot he’s gone. why are your torturing yourself?

Eliot: Because he’s gone. And it’s my fault. And of all the people in the world who don’t understand, somehow you top the list.

Quentin: Every book every movie… is about one special guy. The chosen. You know in real life, for every one guy there are a billion people who aren’t.

Margo: I'm a king. Not a goddamn princess. A king.

Julia: I think it’s because it happened. And there’s nothing… magic about it anymore.

Emily: I don’t blame myself. Except for when I first wake up… and when I go to bed, and all the time in between.

Then obviously any quite related to 3x05 and pretty much the entirety of The Mountain Of Ghosts

I missed a bunch and these are mostly season 1-2 because that’s when I was taking notes during my rewatch

[madstronaut]

PSA: i am an absolute sucker for meet-cutes

ya know what's funny? every time I have the passing thought wondering if I'll run out of fic I've bookmarked to (lovingly) rant about, my moots/cod writers never fail to deliver new bangers after bangers... at this rate my bookmark folder is bursting at the seams and threatening to explode into a big flaming glorious ball of confetti and words and emotions and tears (mine, my tears, those are all mine-)

I have also had the most exhausting past few weeks and seeing memes crop up about "becoming important at work is ruining my life" hit a little too real for me to laugh without crying a teeny bit but you know who i know got me? FANFIC WRITERS MY BELOVEDS THAT'S WHO 💖💖💖 (whom? fuck idk anymore how did I even get my job when I fuck up basic grammar lol)

I have been listening to Posty's new country song with Dolly Parton and it feels incredibly gaz-coded to me... I recently went karaoke-ing and let me tell you I would flirt hardcore by alternately winking constantly/making deep unblinking eyecontact into kyle's baby browns while singing this song anyway sorry totally sidetracked by daydreaming about making out with gaz and then wearing nothing but his hat while i ride his d- [rest of sentence drowned out by dolly parton's bridge]

ok fuck THE FIC WHERE WAS I BACK TO THE FIC

Reading: Firefighter!Kyle by @stellewriites

ok to start mister mistoffelees!!!!!!! what a name I swear cat owners give their pets the wildest names (I met someone who had two cats named porterhousesteak and shakeandbake - both names were pronounced like one word) (also on the off-chance charlotte if you're reading this, let's pretend we are two ships passing in the night and you can ignore my videogame military men thirstblog and i'll ignore the names you chose to bestow on your pets)

and even before stelly described him I KNEW HE WAS AN ORANGE CAT 😂

also I have not read or seen Cats the book/musical/movie prior to reading this fic but this made me want to so that I can flirt with stelleverse!kyle

“please misty, my arms are tired and my neighbours have probably already lost all respect for me,” you groaned. it turned into a huff when he turned away to clean his paws, ignoring you again. “you win! there, happy? you furry little orange devil, you fucking win!”

🤭🤭🤭 ok but let's be real we've all been there pleading with pettos and having full-on one-sided conversations with em

you pulled out your phone and skimmed the articles you’d pulled up advising you on how to get a stuck cat out of a tree.

*running to google* also is this not the most millenial/gen-z thing to do!!!! lmao the things I have googled....

“ah that looks like a job for our best man, don’ya agree, si? think this requires garrick’s expertise,” the man said again, smirking at the man sat next to him up front.

we stan a man who sees someone and goes "that's my mate's type" i feel like soap would be such a good wingman

“oi! i’d be happy to help the bonnie thing with their pussy, but ah thought you might appreciate stretching yer legs,” ‘tav huffed from the window.

irl men saying this to me: mace to the face first, questions later

fictional video game men saying this line to me: *practicing deep lunges so I can open my legs for them even wider*

“ahh ok,” kyle nodded. he tested the balance of the ladders against the tree. “musical or book?” my mum used to love t. s. eliot, so i know probably more than i should about it,” he joked, slowly reaching his hand out for misty to sniff at.

NERDY MAMA'S BOY THEATER LOVER CAT WHISPERER HIMBO KYLE MY BELOVED (seriously stelly just took all my fucking weaknesses and rolled them into firefighter!kyle)

“it’s what we’re here for,” kyle said easily, shrugging as he came to stand before you. “plus, it’s always easy when the callers are so pretty.” “hah! right, yeah he’s a cutie,” you said and wiggled your fingers at misty, letting him bat at them. kyle waited for you to look up before replying. “i meant you,” he said a little sheepishly.

"he said a little sheepishly" that cat better get back in that tree to make space cos I'd be taking a running leap into his arms after rizzing me up like that

“like, how? on the emergency number?” you hinted. “ah fuck,” he swore and patted at his pockets. you heard the scotsman laugh from the truck and hid your own teasing smile behind your hand.

SCCREEEAAAMMMING

I would be remiss not to include this cute little challengefic stelly wrote that I have daydreamed about multiple times after reading (I usually picture gaz or soap here when I read about college/uni!141)

the fic also reminds me of the large lectures I attended in college (I was a solid sit near the middle or 2/3 up the room but never allll the way in the back student) where I observed in no particular order:

several randos watching various LOTR movies on their laptop

watching Pirates of the Caribbean and Dragon Ball Z was also super popular

also anime porn! FUCKING WHY THO SIT AT THE VERY BACK IF YOU'RE GONNA DO THIS YOU FUCKING DEGENERATE I DID NOT NEED TO SEE THAT IN MY SOPHOMORE LINGUISTICS LECTURE

also re: chronic anime porn purveyor -> seeing a girl straight up go over and unplug his charger from the wall socket AND his laptop and just WALK AWAY WITH IT 😂🙌 (my queen I still think about you from time to time after all these years, I oft pray to match a thimbleful of your energy)

girl playing Pokemon Red on an emulator on her laptop (I was riveted and also went to search and download the same and got lost in the sauce burning through all the pokegames for a hot minute too...THANK YOU ARIA!!!!!!!!)

guy playing tetris on his comp at an INSANELY god-tier speed level; i'm positive he did it for an audience because i swear i saw people attempting to look for and sit behind him to observe him during classes to watch his ass play (noooo this wasn't me who said that also he was kinda cute in a 'you are very competent in this weirdly niche area and i find that kinda hot' way)

girl dropping $800+ on topshop website (am I dating myself mentioning topshop lol is it still around?!?!)

guy speedwriting a paper for another class and turning it in - all during a totally unrelated class, honestly was impressed

girl flawlessly applying liner, lipstick, and a glitter topper without spilling or getting the glitter everywhere (btw at a 9am lecture? slay sis)

anyway can you tell i went to a very large uni lol OK WHERE WAS I BACK TO FIC BACK TO FIC

you stared at the screen unblinkingly, thoroughly distracted from your course and the discussion around you until a hand holding a slip of paper appeared at your shoulder in your peripheral. you flicked your eyes up and found the professor busy facing the board and took the chance to swivel in your seat to look up at the one above yours and the handsome man that currently claimed it.

I can physically feel my pupils popping til they engulf my eyes as I read this - also I loved the premise of this challenge (cali my beloved making bangers as usual @the-californicationist) with people having to guess who the chara was! one of the verrrry first fics I read in cod fandom was an insert-blorbo-of-your-choice-here x reader that I looooooooooved; I find the fill-in-the-blank aspect verrrry titillating✨

“i could maybe think of some way you could thank me,” he acquiesced, smile turning sly. “better concentrate on the front of the class for now though.” he nodded forward.

can also physically feel my pupils turning to heart eyes at this line 😍UNFFFF YES YES LET'S HAPPILY BRAINSTORM THE MANY MANY M A N Y WAYS I COULD THINK OF THANKING YOU GOOD SIR

i met some of my best mates (and earned some wild stories to boot) at uni, as they say over on the other side of the pond, and all the fun cute chaotic little moments of serendipity sprang back up when I read stelly's works and made me feel incredibly nostalgic 🥰🥰🥰 going old school and pulling out my 2008 neutrogena lipgloss out of memory lane for my chef's kisses for yooouuuuu mwahmwahmwahmwah😙👌😙👌😙👌😙👌

[fluffypotatey]

Leverage 2x01

Yo ✌️ been some time since I’ve watched this show, but I am here!!!! New season new heists idk what I am getting into

Episode calls itself “the Beantown Bailout Job” 👀 so someone will be going to jail??? We’ll see I guess

the hell is Nate doing at an office??? no heist???? 🥺🥺🥺

no wait y’all they got back together end of s1 right????

the cut off at the finale was a fake out right???? my criminal found family are still in touch with each other right????

NATE IS NOT GETTING AN OFFICE JOB NO

lmao he did a batman (and yes!!! you would have hated it there Natty-boy)

ooooh ok and here we have our new poor souls for the episode 

????

Oh he’s the banker????

What are you doing dude listen to your daughter 

NATE NO

OH SHIT

ok if they hit Nate that will be a little funny

what a way to meet a new client lmao

DAM

OH SHIT

oh no the dad is gonna die

shit

Stressed

Leverage stop stressing me out challenge 

Oh hey! Dad isn’t dead

WE HAVE AN INTRO?????

Oh it’s so dated but I love it

Ok ok I think I see where this is going

Boss is so shifty. How dare you be so judgmental about alcoholics to Nate >:( he has just placed you on his shit list

awwww poor babygirl 🤧 

SOPHIEEEEEEE

SHE IS IN SOUND OF MUSIC

OH MY GOD

OH MY GOD

OHHHHHHH MY GOF

REUNIÓN

THEY 

THEY

REUNION

TO SEE SOPHIE

y’all I’m crying 🤧 so bad 

how dare they give Sophie bad reviews >:((((( 

Eliot 😂😂😂😂

“That’s very….Catholic” HELP 💀

Parker I love you

Hardinson I love you

ELIOT NO

“Not me!” Says the most criminal of them all

“I am not a thief” says the biggest thief of them all

OH SHIT

Sophie what accent was that???

PARKER

WHY ARE YOU A NUN

Hardinson already hacking shit my beloved

HARDINSON MY HACKER MY BELOVED

Eliot looks so excited saying he nabbed a briefcase

THEY ALREADY HAVE A PLAN I LOVE THEM

“What, you think she dresses like a nun for no reason?” “….she’s Parker.” no yeah that’s valid

Y’all we cannot just be 15 minutes in help me

This is such a nice apartment for one guy

Poor Eliot, always the guy (child) caught in the middle of the Nat/Sophie disaster affair

HARDINSON

OH MY GOD

fucking dying Parker the nun and Hardinson the priest help me

“I did look for you” NOBODY TOUCH ME

Parker are you flirting 👀👀👀

They just made his apartment their new office lmao

Love how Hardinson knows how to play Nate

“Oops,” says Hardinson because he, in fact, did see Eliot before he left and sent him to go look for more shit which just so happens to be in mob territory :)

YES ELIOT

LETS GO!!!! FUCK EM UP

Parker I love you

Nate :) it’s ok :) don’t hold yourself back :) help them out :) just this once yeah?

He can’t even help himself it’s so funny. He has to speak. He must share his knowledge 

I love how they all are like “yeah of course, Nate. Just one last job. Of course.”

YES HARDINSON AND PARKER FBI DUO BACK AGAIN (they aren’t playing fbi rn but you know what I mean)

Eliot & Hardinson my beloved

“Jimmy Ford’s kid” oh? They know his dad?

Love you Sophie <333333

Ohhhhhh I get it

Wait so is the dad going to die?????

Nate’s fatherly behavior coming out my beloved

NATE’S FATHERLY BEHAVIOR ACTIVATING HIS MOTIVATION FOR THIS SEASON

ok so I just know they did some extra shit we didn’t see which will tie this heist up nicely but AGH I WANNA KNOW

“There’s a problem” oh no! how will this interfere with the heist! i sure hope they have many contingencies 

Oh shit wait ok this is a big problem

“Make this up as we go” oh fuck 

Wait this guy sounds sO familiar

ELIOT!!!! ELIOT DAMGER

man, i sure hope Nate recorded all of that 👀

Eliot will not die 

WHO

NO 

WAIT HE IS FINE THO RIGHT???

Oh ok he’s fine it’s just Sophie

Sophie what are you planning 

Aw poor O’Hare

Love how Hardinson changes his voice for intimidation 

You are going shoot the dad in a hospital. Where the gunshot will be heard. As if no one will catch you. Yeah, sure go for it banker man

HAHA

LMAO THEY DID ROB IT

Awwwwww happy ending 🥰

“Still your last job?” Lmao 

Sophie you fucking liar you do not have a boyfriend

No 🥺 (y’all she doesn’t right?)

NO NATE >:( stop being dumb (ok fine just sniff it like a weird person i guess)

Well at least he paid 🙄

YES!!! APARTMENT OFFICE

THE GANG IS BACK

General thoughts: 

THE GANG IS BACK :D 

My only hope is that they don’t separate ever again in the future. Please. They are so lonely without each other. The fact that a Hardinson looked for Parker 🥺 and how he has probably looked for the rest of them. Just to keep tabs. Also how Hardinson knows a lot about Pakistan through White House emails and Eliot was in Pakistan!!!!! My ot3 heart 🤧(Yeah I am totally believing Hardinson checked the White House emails to keep tabs on Eliot. what about it?)

And how Sophie invited all of them to her show as a way of reuniting them, and her and Parker may have stayed in touch since they seem to have planned a surprise like 🥺 idk just the fact that Sophie and Parker are close gives me the warm and fuzzies

Omfg and the fact that their new office is Nate’s apartment and how everyone just falls into their roles so nicely. Like they never left it. As if it they’re all meant to be together 🫠

Love this show

[clarajohnson]

the magicians s1e12

guys i'm having so much fun with this rewatch (recap reminds me that richard killed his son through neglect and q betrayed alice with the threesome and julia's about to get duped by a fake goddess) um

this kitchen reminds me of the season 4 apartment but i'm having fun so i'm not gonna think about season 4

such a small thing but i have beef with the dude imbuing kady with faith by doing something for her like. i guess we disagree on what faith is!

you can't unring a bell so be certain when you call, julia!

poor penny getting stuck babysitting three neurotics and one alice (not neurotic relative to everybody else In This One Thing)

cannot get over q being the one who initiated it. i just can't.

jesus christ jason ralph is so hot

in 2015 you could sell an audience on the badassery of a line just by including the term patriarchy

please alice drinking triple sec :'''-)

we talk about alice's style being sexy librarian but it reads much more to me as a girl who knows she could fall at any second into twee oblivion so she's styling it in dark colors. i'm waiting for an owl necklace.

ooh! dionysus, okay!

i did NOT remember her hooking up with richard. but. i'm fine with it.

mannnnn i love julia wicker so much she is the epitome of the girl with an inch-thick tough exterior filled with love all the rest of the way through she is so special and good

fucking "didn't think you had that in you" go to hell quentin! oh MY cheating is okay YOUR consensual sex outside of a relationship is BAD! again this is why i hated him the first time around

How I was feeling about Quentin would have got us all killed. :l

i kind of feel like if he was a real person i would have bullied quentin coldwater or at least been very rude to him. sorry quentin!

lol the "janet" "actually it's margo" "this time" joke went over my head last time

I PLANNED MY WHOLE OUTFIT AROUND THAT BOTTLE !!!!!

truth serum is toxic and banned? interesting

"oh i was kind of poking around in the dark with that one" lollll my baby

quentin WOULD always bring up groundhog day. also he's actually stronger than me because if fogg told me i'd been killed in these exact circumstances 39 times i would absolutely lose all hope and try and beat the beast to the punch

penny has chemistry with everybodyyyyy

i'm in love with julia's pier one ass apartment

julia and q's reunion gets me so good !!!!! so bad !!!! "you smell the same" wow you guys should be friends forever for your entire lives and you WILL be!

julia calling god magic "some pretty eclectic shit" like it's a limited run pressing of a neutral milk hotel b-side

cool, useless, kind of gross

julia's destiny is to find a whole new kind of magic. do we think this happens? what is this referring to do we think?

the LOOK q gives julia after "richard gave it to me" so much immediate understanding and shit-stirring delight

it's crazy, like, not crazy but crazy that eliot stays so torn up about mike

"yeah, no, it still sounds bad."

JOSH HOBERMANNNNNNN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

please i did not remember that they were all going to fillory in like fucking ren fair cosplay

MAGIC IS FOR FIXING THINGS JULIA SAYS (also "if fixing things was easy everyone would do it" because somebody needs to fucking validate quentin now and then)

despite my indignation on julia's behalf i do love the choice of isolating her from the academic environment of brakebills, i think it adds a new dimension and texture to her knowledge and understanding and engagement with the world around her and i like that so much

it's fucking crazy that q and jules just... do horomancy. like horomancy is such a big fucking thing the rest of the show and in this ep they just do it!

alice's light bending feels so much like a superpower, it's so rare that they let magic seem that magical but they let it happen there and i love that

margo hanson i love you and your gun forever

the moment jules and q step through the telephone booth always kind of gets me it's so much of what the promise of the show can be it's so lovely

[spiders-hth-is-an-outlier]

now I'm curious, can you tell us more about writing Flourish out of order? what made you decide to try writing it that way? what was agonizing about it??

I think honestly I decided to do it that way as an experiment, because so many other writers say it works for them, and on paper it does seem like a good strategy for keeping your interest focused over a long project. It's something I'd been interested in experimenting with for a while, and Flourish seemed like the right story for it because of the structure.

If your memory is good or you've read the author's notes recently, you'll know that Flourish began life kind of as a stunt -- a bunch of people on Tumblr were laughing at Rudy Giuliani, as one does, and saying that "landscaper next to the dildo store" should become the new fandom trope to replace "flower shop next to the tattoo parlor." I often get ideas by hearing something stupid and thinking, okay, but if you did want to do that for real, how would you? And I got really hooked on this idea of Quentin running this super nerdy, Ivy League sex shop, and Eliot, who comes from this canonically working-class background, struggling to find some kind of balance between his origin story and his artistic temperament in a way that was more complex than just fucking off and pretending to be someone else.

But that was really all I had, going in! There was absolutely nothing like a plot involved. I knew it would have to take place over a year or more, so I kind of broke it out seasonally and did a bunch of research about gardening in Pennsylvania specifically and the landscaping industry generally (my Kindle Unlimited algorithms were bonkers for a while). I noodled around with the concept of plants and blooming where you're planted. I came up with a huge, detailed backstory for the Waugh family, since I knew it was going to have to be his connection to his family that drew Eliot there at all, and I knew I really liked the idea that Eliot and Ted became garden buddies before Eliot and Quentin were really a thing. I had a general sense that there was going to be a culminating conflict between Julia wanting to leave the business and Q feeling betrayed by that. And at the point where I signed up for the Big Bang, that was more or less all I knew, and I thought, okay, maybe what I do is just put these characters in rooms and let them bounce off each other until I figure out what I really want the story to look like.

And honestly, that part wasn't too disastrous. I wrote a lot of the Eliot stuff first, since I had a stronger sense of his conflict, and I let Quentin's Whole Deal emerge gradually -- which is why I think his arc is a little more messy, but you can get away with messy in Quentin's case, it's Quentin.

I got to the point where I had about 30k of fiction and I was like, okay, I get this story, I can explain it to myself. I wrote an outline. And that's where I fucked up, because what I should have done is backed up to the beginning and wrote like I always do, filling in the gaps chronologically and editing completed scenes where necessary. But I was still into this idea that I was Letting the Story Lead Me or some fucking thing, who knows, and I started just tackling scenes from my outline whenever I thought of something cool to do with them.

And that was a disaster, because what I should have realized about myself is that for me, the pleasure of writing is in the momentum of it. When I write, I do generally have a sense of what the third act will contain, but the fun of it is kind of -- building the deck or laying out the game board. I spend a lot of time setting up People With Problems, and then as I'm actually writing, I'm solving their problems, and the biggest component of that is letting them talk long enough to figure out what they think their problems are, which is rarely what I think their problems are, but to me the most interesting thing about any human being is where they're wrong about themselves. So as I write, I'm always using the things these characters say and think to build the conflict, I'm basically starting out with my story and learning as I go why they're not already doing what I think they should do -- what I will eventually get them to do.

This may all seem a little abstract, but trust me, there's a click that happens when the story shifts gears and I'm no longer setting things up, but now I'm writing to address what's in motion, not to Create Problems On Purpose anymore, but to drive those problems to a head and then solve them. And with Flourish, I never felt that click, I was never able to Win the Story, because big chunks of the first act still weren't in place until very late in the process.

And on a practical level, it meant that certain late things were supposed to be a bigger deal, but I wrote it so slowly and with such frustration that I just didn't have time to set them up as much as I imagined I would -- Quentin's contentious relationship with Marina was supposed to be a thread, and when I wrote the later scenes it was theoretically resonant that Julia says "you both made me carry this as a secret from the people I love, you both let me down." But then the way the story evolved, that just got squeezed out because there wasn't an organic spot for it and I didn't have time to create new scenes for it. So stuff like that, where if I'd been writing Act Three with complete knowledge of what actually had and hadn't happened earlier, I'd have approached it differently. And that was super frustrating and made me feel like I was fucking it up.

In retrospect, I do like Flourish a lot. I think I made the story work, mostly just through brute force. But when I look at it, I can definitely see the seams, where the transitions seem abrupt and random, where certain things still look to me like responses to events that never actually happened in the story. It's fine, it worked out mostly. But I truly never enjoyed writing it in the way I usually enjoy writing, and I absolutely think it's because I didn't have a strong, completed first act pushing me through to an ending that felt like a justified payoff to Page One.

Anyway, thanks for the ask, this was cathartic! And, uh, people should read Flourish, which I think is a pretty decent little novel about taking the hand you're dealt in life and trying to turn it into something you're proud of. It's so AU that I think even if you've never seen a Magicians in your life, it's completely readable.

[error404vnotfound]

JANE AUSTEN RANKED BY YOURS TRULY

hi :]

it is done. I've read it all (*kicks Lady Susan under a rug*) what was that?

anyways

after seven whole months i come to you with the objectively correct ranking of JA main novels, heroines, and heroes

i will not be taking any criticism

let's begin then

on the line today we have

Northanger Abbey with contestants Catherine Morland and Henry Tilney

Sense and Sensibility's Elinor and Marianne Dashwood, Edward Ferrars and Colonel Brandon

Emma's own Emma Woodhouse, George Knightley and Frank Churchill

Persuasion bringing Anne Eliot and Captain Wentworth

and Mansfield Park's Fanny Price, Edmund Bertram and Henry Crawford

v what do you mean Frank and Henry they aren't Heroes why are you ranking them?

well because I can and want to

v what about Pride and Prejudice?

i can't be objective about it or Darcy or Lizzy. it would be unfair to everyone else. tho you are right I will be ranking Charles Bingley I have things to say about the man

cool? cool

THE NOVELS

yes i will only be ranking the main novels (and no lady susan because i dont want to reread it)

LOVED THEM TIER

EMMA

i did not want this book to end, i was having the time of my life. it's just. so good

reading it knowing what is going on was a delightful experience

i love emma and knightley so much

maple grove should burn to the ground. for my sanity

NORTHANGER ABBEY

Catherine carried this book that's all I gotta say

coming of age story but make it the 19th century

below Emma because I can take reading about Maple Grove but not hearing the Thorpes speak

I JUST THINK THEY ARE NEAT :]

SENSE AND SENSIBILITY

I just. think it's neat

I really have nothing else to say. I was invested, I felt for Elinor, and Marianne's evolution was 10/10

fuck John Dashwood for cutting down that tree

IM SORRY JANE (aka the Fail Love Interest Syndrome)

PERSUASION

i was a little bored ngl

did like Anne well enough tho

also. that piano scene. thanks I hate it. it will haunt me for the rest of my life

MANSFIELD PARK

Mary and Edmund ruined this for me in the way that they represent everything wrong with the allos and in the way that i wanted to slap them both out of their nonsense

i also didn't connect much with Fanny so :/

HEROINES

no tiers, just ranking them :]

EMMA (Emma)

I LOVE HER I LOVE HER I LOVE HER

Emma never change

she's so wrong all the time and I love her so much

<3

CATHERINE (NA)

MY GIRL

she's aggressively 17 (affectionate)

a DELIGHT

she grows so much 😭😭😭 im so proud of her

she will be an amazing adult

ELINOR (S&S)

it's the eldest daughter hardship for me

she puts up with so much bullshit from everyone around her

deserves a paid vacation, the right to murder people, and a nap, not necessarily in that order

lowkey carried

MARIANNE (S&S)

I will be the first to admit that I disliked her at first because she was aggressively 17 (derogatory)

but she !!!!! grows so much !!!!!! im so proud of her

always championed her older sister when no one else would and for that i gotta love her

ANNE (Persuasion)

suffers from FLIS (fail love interest syndrome)

girl it's been 8 years supéralo

also puts up with so much the sad bitch I do love her

FANNY (MP)

FLIS

had the chance of marrying Henry but didn't take it (like. I get why. but I'd respect her more for being a I Can Fix It Girlie than settling for the piece of wet bread that's Edumnd)

did not connect with her at all sorry bestie :(

HEROES (and then some)

i will put them into tiers. because I have Issues with most of them. also im judging them solely on how they relate to their Heroine that's the only worth they have to me

FAULTLESS

KNIGHTLEY (Emma - Emma)

what can I say he had impeccable chemistry with Emma

they were married from page 1

he truly cares for her and to make her improve as a person and I love him

COOL DUDE

EDWARD (S&S - Elinor)

my guy

had a scene with big brother energy with Marianne and I was sold

could use a little bit more Standing Up For Your Future Happiness but it's in character so I'll give him a pass

HENRY (NA - Catherine)

he's said to be the best Austen men and while I get why I just. he just wasn't giving to me

but yeah good to Catherine, amazing brother to his sister, knows feminine interests, amiable, etc

suffers from NA was the first book i read back in may so i dont remember much of his moments

LITTLE SHIT <3

CRAWFORD (NA)

my fail boy

the one plot point I enjoyed

let's point and laugh at the flirt that falls in love with the mildest girl ever who dislikes him and then when he's refused has an affair with a married woman

way to go bud ily

FRANK CHURCHILL (Emma)

he's such a piece of shit

was very fun to read

Jane should dump him tho he doesn't deserve her

I'LL BE WATCHING YOU, BUD

BINGLEY (P&P - Jane)

DARCY'S NOT THE BOSS OF YOU, MAN

can't be mad at him for long because of the puppy energy he has tho

BUT MAN THAT WAS ALMOST A YEAR'S ABSENCE YOU GOT AWAY WITH

COLONEL BRANDON (S&S - Marianne)

MY DUDE. WHY DIDN'T YOU SPILL THE TEA SOONER

oh yeah I'll let this Confirmed Rake keep courting the woman I'm in love with while everyone expects them to be either engaged or about to be as I know he's literally the worst, make sense

i just can't wrap my head around it

BOOOOOOO (FLIS)

CAPTAIN WENTWORTH (Persuasion - Louisa Anne)

more like captain failworth

people love this man and I just don't get it

MAN IT'S BEEN 8 YEARS. GET OVER IT

he's spiteful and resentful towards Anne when she did was she had to idk dude grow tf up

almost gets trapped in a marriage with a silly girl because he's dumb (good thing the girl is silly and jumped off a cliff so he could run back to anne) (that's an exaggeration but basically)

your only point of redemption is that by marrying you Anne gets out of the toxic environment she was in

EDMUND (NA - Mary Fanny)

imagine a glass of water. imagine that glass of water under the sun. not just any sun, no, a good midday August Spanish sun. imagine now a piece of bread. good. put that piece of bread inside the glass of water. that's this guy to me

all holier than thou but then spends 98% of the novel thinking with his dick

i. hate him.

takes fanny for granted

marries fanny because it's convenient (AND IN LIKE. THE THIRD TO LAST PARAGRAPH WHEN IN THE PREVIOUS PARAGRAPH HE WAS STILL COMPLAINING ABOUT MARY!!!!!! DUDE!!!!!!)

he's the worst

everyone that sucked gets punished but him

i want to personally kill this man

and that was basically it thanks for coming with me in this journey wow that was fun

hi @my-cursed-prince

[sgtjamesrogers]

one line, any fic!

tagged by @novasforce :)

some no pressure tags for- @marnz, @dicktective, @shhhenanigans, @fromcainwithlove, @transhorrors, @antagonistenthusiast, and @spector27.

pick any 10 of your fics, scroll somewhere to the mid point, pick a line, and share it! Then tag 10 people.

i'm only slightly afraid to revisit some of these. and i probably will not do all ten, because some of these don't need to be looked at again.

MASOCHIST - published to lj (!!) in 2010, ao3 in 2011.

"So, this is your big idea of fun? Sitting in the humidity watching snot noised brats play on dangerous metal playground equipment? I think you have the mistaken impression that because I foolishly told you my sob story last night in a fit of insanity that I secretly adore things like frolicking kittens and sparkly vampires."

"Like there's anything actually fun that you'd rather be doing," Luke tossed back at him, making a dismissive noise at him with a crooked grin. 

"I'd rather be having a drink," Reid says in an undertone, resisting the urge to put his head in his hands, feeling a dull ache building behind his eyes.

TO LOVE A BEAST - published to lj for the lurebigbang in 2010.

And then there’s the gentlest of touches through his hair, long nails just lightly skimming his scalp. That’s so nice that Luke makes a contented little noise, burrowing back into the arm that supported him. The arm the supported him. Luke sat straight up, suddenly wide awake. Reid’s arms still held the position Luke had been lying, almost across his lap, supported by one arm like a child. He looks at Luke a little sheepishly, letting his arms fall into his lap.

QUALITY PROGRAMMING FOR CHILDREN 101 - first fic published only to ao3 in 2011.

“Jack, we talked about this.”

“No, you talked about this, using your patented long winded, ‘beat around the bush and also my head’ style of conversation, all I did was grunt noncommittally when you finally finished,” Jack responded with a smile at Eliot as he clapped along, and generally had the time of his two year old life. It was almost enough to make David feel guilty about outlawing Barney, except when he looked back at the tv and saw the wide moving mouth and crazily spinning eyes, and nope, absolutely no regrets.

SAME OLD LANG SYNE - published very, very pre-catws, if you can believe it.

The Soldier is gone now, but this man who wears James's skin, he's still not Steve's Bucky either. He no longer has the urgent need to dispatch with Captain America at any means necessary, but neither does he retain any of the memories before that long and terrible fall. It ties Steve in knots that Bucky doesn't even remember his own favorite color, or how he liked his burger cooked, or the way he used to wake Steve back in their Brooklyn; yanking the blanket off him with a mischievous grin and pulling him by his ankles to the end of the bed, where he'd meet Steve's grumbling mouth with his own. 

A BEAST OF BURDEN. - published 2013.

"Fuck it," he says finally, ripping his side of the blankets off of himself and stalking over to the door and slinging the door open hard enough for it to bounce back off of the wall protector. The kitten automatically scurries in, leaping up onto the bed of the bed, and Louis follows it like he's approaching the gallows. He flops face down into bed, and falls almost immediately asleep.

When he wakes up, sleep grit in his eyes and mouth and reaches over to check the time the lockscreen of his phone is himself, asleep with Audrey Hepburn perched on top of his head, but that's honestly par for the course at this point.

KEEP BURNING ME UP (WITH ALL OF YOUR LOVE) - published 2014

"But you don't have paprika," she says, eyes closed.

"I have paprika," he groans, like he knows what's going to come out of her mouth next.

"But not real paprika," Barbara answers with a satisfied smile, as if that settles it.

SHOULD'VE BEEN HOME YESTERDAY - published 2/2020, in progress.

The lamp is tragically grotesque, with four taxidermied mice holding miniature instruments clustered around the stem leading upward under the lampshade; a splash picture of a mountain range. Roy thinks that one of the mice has a mustache. 

“But wait, look—“ 

Roy gave the pull chain a tug, and a muffled speaker hidden on the base plays a tinny ‘ Born To Be Wild ’ by Steppenwolf. He grins at Jason’s immediate revulsion; it’s almost cartoonish in the pout of his mouth as Roy sings along tunelessly, using the purple gatorade in his fist as a mic. 

AIN'T THAT A KICK IN THE HEAD? - published 6/2022

“I… can’t get over how good your quads are, dude,” Chris whispered finally, clearing his throat. “You could really crush somebody’s head between these.” Adrian slid back down over Chris’ hips, beaming. 

FOR THE LONGEST TIME - published 10/2022, in progress.

With the pack safely in his back pocket again he crouches and curls one firm hand around the back of Hughie’s neck, kissing him sweet and deep. 

“See? You wanna taste like that every day?” 

Their lips brush as Butcher speaks, and Hughie feels his body starting to light up again. 

“Mmmmaybe?” He sighs out, just barely opening his eyes and giving Butcher a malevolent grin. “You better kiss me again so I can be sure.” 

[astralscrivener]

for the book asks: 3 4 5 6?

3. What were your top five books of the year?

oohhh i love this question!! i read a Lot of good books this year so this is hard to narrow down so i will do my best

1. the darkness outside us by eliot schrefer rewired my brain chemistry entirely. i think the marketing leaned a little too hard into “haha cute gays in space” and did not prepare me for the existential space horror and the romance of it all. i’m NOT a reread person generally but we’re approaching the time of year that i read it (early january) and i’m really feelin a reread this year. my tbr stack is so big so i shouldn’t but i’m just 👀👀👀

2. babel, or the necessity of violence: an arcane history of the oxford translators’ revolution by r.f. kuang everyone is raving about this and i am one of them!! it tackles colonialism and white privilege so well, and i love the way r.f. kuang set it up like an academic paper with the long title and the FOOTNOTES. and i love that in general she gives us. a bibliography in the back of the book. you can FEEL how much research goes into her writing. i’m also a little biased because i was a classics major and i miss doing translation, and the book made me look at translation from a new perspective!! also i cried

3. the fifth season by n.k. jemisin this has been on my tbr for so long and i finally read it for my queer lit class and it fucks SO hard. i love the worldbuilding in this one, i love the use of narration and perspective, i love the characters, i’m emotional about syenite and alabaster, and i NEED TO READ THE NEXT TWO BOOKS. as soon as the semester is over and i get thru a couple of the things i’m reading rn, i’m hopping on it

4. the city of dusk by tara sim a lot of people say this should be YA because the characters are early 20s and act like people in their early 20s but i loved it. the entire time i was reading it i was just like. this is something i want to write. this is something i would write. this has the vibes of stuff i am writing right now. just a book handcrafted to appeal to me, personally. entirely queer main cast but it didn’t feel to me like some of the other books that came out in the last couple years that are queer, if that makes sense? i feel like some books hinge on the “look at our diverse cast!” marketing but have no substance, but this was FUN. very much dark d&d campaign vibes. the main character is unhinged. the gods are in a broken-ass marriage. i just loved it so fucking much but also that’s from a personal basis

5. ocean’s echo by everina maxwell another one that’s more personal bias than anything! i adored winter’s orbit last year and was very excited to read this one. it’s a milSF/romance (shelved as SF) and i love the main characters so much. everina maxwell keeps writing family fuckups who use bravado to cover up the fact that they hate themselves falling in love with characters who are so duty-driven and anxious that they’ll let themselves get hurt over and over without standing up for themselves and i will eat it up every single time

4. Did you discover any new authors that you love this year?

i knew i would love r.f. kuang and n.k. jemisin, i just hadn’t gotten the chance to read them before this year but holy shit. holy fucking shit. both of their writing is so good. the poppy war is another fave read of the year, and i said it up there but i’ll say it again, i’m SO excited to continue the broken earth trilogy. i also have the city we became and i’m really looking forward to it!!

i also read the seven devils duology by laura lam and elizabeth may, and i love the way they wrote their characters. it’s an ensemble cast and i think they handled it so well. there were some characters that were more main than others, but none of them ever felt like caricatures just meant to fill a role/trope, yknow? laura lam has a new book coming out and it’s got dragons in it, and i am Looking

5. What genre did you read the most of?

i read just about an equal amount of fantasy and SF! i think fantasy just wins by like, one book. this doesn’t surprise me!! those are my favorite genres to read. i like it when characters can punch the physical manifestations of their problems. in the face. with enchanted swords. or shoot them with laser guns. yknow?

6. Was there anything you meant to read, but never got to?

SO MANY. so many books, not enough time in the year. i meant to start the wayfarers series by becky chambers, the strange the dreamer duology by laini taylor, finish the villains duology by v.e. schwab, and finally get through a full reading of the iliad and the odyssey. i’ve read most of them, but i haven’t ever actually read the full thing, because there are simply some passages my classics professors saw and said “y’all don’t need to know this <3″. i will get to you one day, catalogue of ships 😔

end-of-year book ask!

[antianakin]

I don't particularly care for your patronizing and condescending tone, but fine, let's discuss this.

I get to use Lucas quotes to back my own argument up because he's been contradictory on this apparently.

"Anakin can't be redeemed for all the pain and suffering he's caused."

Anakin has an OUNCE of good left in him and he uses it to save Luke. Yes, that's a good thing. But is it not, in some ways, still self-serving? He does it for HIS SON, he wouldn't have done it for anybody else. The only thing that makes it even slightly selfless is the possibility that he won't live through the attempt to kill Palpatine, so he's willing to die for Luke I guess, but like. Does this get to count as redemption?

I don't know that I'd say Anakin "turned back to the Light" honestly. Like I know that that's what happens in canon, but Anakin uses that tiny ounce of goodness in him to save someone he personally cares about from dying. Big whoop. It's not honestly all that different from the last time he decided to cause a regime change to save someone he personally cares about from dying aside from the fact that he's going to die, too. Saving someone he cares about from dying by personally murdering the people in charge doesn't make Anakin Light because it's exactly the same thing he does when he goes full Sith, too. The galaxy just got lucky that Luke was stupid enough to throw away his weapon in front of the fucking Sith Master, making himself completely vulnerable and forcing Anakin to make a choice that ultimately led to the fulfillment of a prophecy almost by accident.

This is why it doesn't feel like redemption to me. Nothing is truly fixed, nothing is changed. Anakin himself hasn't even changed all that much. Anakin didn't kill Palpatine because he recognized that he should've done that in the first place, he doesn't do it for the sake of the galaxy, he doesn't do it to make amends for anything he's done, and he never would've even done it for a random stranger Palpatine was crispy frying.

The whole "children bring out the best in you" message doesn't work for me with Anakin because the personal connection to Luke is part of the problem here. Anakin has ALWAYS been perfectly capable of murder for people he considers family. He massacres a Tusken village for Shmi, he commits double genocide for Padme, he murders Palpatine for Luke.

I haven't removed any nuance from the story from my perspective. You can go read my post about redemption via Eliot Spencer from Leverage where I discuss my feelings on redemption in more detail. You can be irredeemable and still choose to be a better person. Or, more accurately, you can do irredeemable things and still choose to be a better person, but those things you've done are still irredeemable. And that's how I choose to view it for Anakin, too. Anakin's not redeemed, he's not redeemable, the things he's done are too big and too unfixable for redemption. Those Jedi can't be brought back to life, the trauma the few who have survived have undergone can't be erased, the Temple can't be un-desecrated and defiled, their history can't be remade. There's no redeeming that. But of course he can choose to make better choices from this point out. Of course he can choose to be better today than he was yesterday. That doesn't change how irredeemable he or his actions are.

Choice is important in Star Wars. Anakin can always make better choices, he's just choosing not to do so right up until the last possible moment where he makes the smallest of better choices by saving someone he personally gives a shit about via murdering a dude who is not so great generally. But the choices he made before still matter. And the things he's done still matter.

I think it's OKAY for someone to be irredeemable, personally. Maybe you're the one who lacks some nuance here. Because at no point have I ever argued that just because Anakin can't be redeemed doesn't mean he can't be better or make better choices. I'm just divorcing the concept of redemption from the fact that he can make better choices. That's not what redemption means to me.

I don't think Anakin can be redeemed. I do think Anakin can always choose to be a better person and I think he makes one final "better" choice at the end of his life. I don't think that means he "turned back to the Light" because quite honestly I think if he'd survived ROTJ and been forced to keep living with the consequences of his actions that he wouldn't have suddenly been a fucking angel who shit roses and rainbows out his burnt up asshole. That man is still someone who was fully a fascist while "in the Light," who 100% believed in dictatorship as a good form of government so long as the right person was in charge while "in the Light" (and we see no sign of that changing, just that his opinion of Palpatine being the right person has probably changed), who is fully willing and capable of murder to protect the people he cares about while "in the Light." Anakin post ROTJ is going to struggle a LOT with still being someone fully immersed in darkness and whose first instinct is NOT going to generally be the better one. I don't see Anakin doing well in a world where he survives ROTJ, honestly. There's just not enough goodness left in him to do well in that world. One ounce isn't enough, it just isn't.

So at this point, yet again, we're at a semantic stand still. Your definition of redemption seems to be about just whether they've made even one better choice. Anakin makes one singular better choice and so he is now redeemed. That's what redemption means to you. More power to you. My definition of redemption is about how well a person can actually make up for what they've done, how much they can fix the mistakes they've made. And it's separate from whether someone can make better choices going forward. So by my definition, Anakin isn't redeemed, regardless of whether he's made a single better choice or many better choices, because there's no undoing what he's done and no fixing any of the damage he's caused. There's no redemption for that available.

But there's no real arguing over semantics. If your definition of redemption differs from mine, I think you're just going to have to accept that. If that bothers you, you know where the block button is, no one's forcing you to read my posts.

"You can't tell me Vader isn't redeemed at the end when he regains his autonomy to save his son."

Ho boy, YES I CAN!

You know why? Because multiple ENTIRE CULTURES are still eradicated.

There are a HANDFUL of Jedi left alive when Anakin dies. Out of THOUSANDS. Think about that one again. Literally only a few that we can confirm are actually alive when Anakin kicks the bucket (Luke, Ahsoka, probably Ezra). Most of the rest were killed during Order 66 (a LARGE number of which Anakin was directly responsible for killing) or were hunted down BY ANAKIN in the last 20-odd years. Or were turned into Inquisitors that Anakin personally tortured for years, forcing them to live among the frozen remains of the Jedi just for extra shits and giggles, until all of them were killed off, too.

There are TWO clones we can confirm are left alive when Anakin dies, out of MILLIONS. Two. I'm counting this one as a second genocide that Anakin helps commit during Order 66 since that's effectively what it ends up meaning for the clones.

And this doesn't count the number of planets we know were devastated by the Empire that Anakin helped put into place and keep in power like Lothal, Ryloth, and Mandalore.

So you know what? No. I don't honestly give a shit that he saved one person that is related to him in the end. I don't care that it meant he had to make a personal sacrifice to do it. I don't care that he had to finally grow a fucking spine in order to kill Palpatine. There is nothing Anakin can do here that will EVER redeem him for the lifetime of absolute atrocities he has committed. There is no sacrifice Anakin can make that wipe out the oceans of blood he lives in.

The Jedi are still dead. The clones are still dead. Mandalore is still glassed. Ryloth and Lothal will take generations to recover from the decades of war and oppression they've lived through. Anakin's death means NOTHING because the people he's ACTUALLY hurt with his actions aren't the reason he decides to kill Palpatine. He can't kill Palpatine in order to save people he doesn't know, or because it's the right thing to do, or to provide the tiniest bit of justice to everyone he's hurt. He does it specifically to save someone he already loves and considers family.

There's no redemption in that for everything he's done. How could there be? Everything he's done is completely irredeemable to begin with.

[neighbours-kid]

sterling doesn‘t know. at the end of 515 he doesn‘t know that nate and sophie retire

he catches on to the con early, much earlier than we‘re explicitly told. when nate shoves him and turns him around so eliot, hardison and parker can enter the server room unseen, sterling gives nate a look, and he knows. he lets it happen, let‘s nate win this one time. he lets nate have the one big score

when they go down to the garage to hand nate over to his lifelong sentence in a secret prison, sterling asks him i don‘t suppose you‘re done and nate just goes what do you think? and then sterling asks about his acting skills and they talk about sophie

he knows sophie is picking nate up. sterling lets them go. he accepts his role as trojan horse when nate pushes him and lets it all play out. nathan, you and i are not the same, we don‘t believe in the same things. and yet. he lets them go. because in the end, justice is always easy

but he doesn‘t—sterling doesn‘t know. despite knowing nate for the longest time, or maybe because he‘s known nate for the longest time, he does not even remotely consider the possibility that nate might ever retire. it‘s just,,,, ridiculous to even consider. nathan ford, the nathan ford? retiring? psshhh never

so sterling goes on. does the work, plays Mr Agent Man at interpol and tries to not think too hard about what letting nate and sophie go means. what it says about him that, this once, he chose their side. that, after all, justice is always easy, and nate is always right, in the end. he packs that away, deep down, better not examine that one, better not think too hard about it

sterling does the work. climbs the metaphorical corporate ladder in the firm as he‘s always done

and then, like it always does, his senses start tingling. works his current case and Something is making him pay more attention. a familiar name maybe, or a routing number he thinks he might‘ve seen before. or maybe it‘s just,,, A Vibe that this particular case has. so he does the job, investigates, does what he‘s good at, excellent at

and a blurry security photograph, eleven espressos and a redacted number of scotches later, he‘s sure. and maybe despite himself, he spreads out the file and smiles. there it is again, finally. took him long enough

so sterling makes the call, files the plans, gathers the agents, gives the briefing, and off they go

but. they‘re not there. not them. sterling arrives at the scene of the crime con and it‘s just three. he shows up, having mentally rehearsed his entrance and the perfect delivery of the hello, nate, and he‘s just,,,, not there. there‘s eliot, glaring at him while finishing off a goon, ready to drop him and put all his angry attention on sterling. there‘s hardison, sticking his head out the van, glaring too. clearly still not forgetting or forgiving about the offices. and there‘s parker, obviously dressed like she played the part of the roper and exuding a confidence after a heist well planned and executed he‘s so far only seen on one face before. so sterling simply stops dead in his tracks

no. that‘s just,,,, wrong. and he‘s disappointed, almost. and very tired all of a sudden. and before eliot is even halfway across the lot, he just turns around and walks away. this is not what he signed up for. where‘s the fun in hunting these thieves if neither nate nor sophie are there to be prickled by his presence. fuck that. fuck the job

and so sterling retires. if nate ford can retire from being a fucking con artist then he can retire from interpol. and so he does. spends some time with olivia. takes a trip that isn‘t work related for the first time in ages. and by the gods he is bored out of his skull. and one day olivia tells him if he doesn‘t find something to do, she‘ll sign him up for some random ass activity for retirees (he‘s not that old, olivia, sweetheart, please)

and late one night over a glass of scotch he‘s mindlessly zapping through the channels on the tv. until he stops suddenly on a rerun of old magnum pi episodes. he used to be obsessed with this when he was younger. and nate teased him about it endlessly

now there‘s an idea

and so he pulls up some pages on his computer and the next day tells olivia he‘s got a new job, he‘ll be back for dinner, he‘s gonna go look at some office spaces downtown

[party-gilmore]

And now I'm laughing at the idea of like... Nana letting these idiots slow play it over family holidays for eight fucking years, smacking at The Cousins whenever they'd tried to give the trio a little nudge, saying "They gotta come to this in their own time, no matter how slow we think they're going. It can be a big leap for some people, and we don't want to push anybody into anything they're not quite ready for."

And maybe the last couple years Nana hasn't been sure if they still weren't Together, or if they were and just weren't ready to talk about it yet, so even though she was starting to get nervous about the length of time it was taking she was keeping her mouth shut. Unless they eventually hit ten years, of course. She was willing to give them time, but a decade? A decade was pushing it.

But they were cutting it close.

Anyway let's say that Hardison made it back stateside for a few days for Thanksgiving with the fam and she answers the door to greet him and Parker, and after their hugs she looks around and is like

"...where's your boy, Alec?"

And Parker's face goes all stormy and she closes up and Hardison chuckles, but it's a little bit sad, and he holds out a sealed crockpot and says "Eliot's, uh, doing Thanksgiving with his new girlfriend this year, you know, that whole uh... exciting stage where you want every minute together you can find an excuse for, right? Haha... anyway, he uh, he sent his chilli though, so..." he trails off as he watches his foster mom's face grow tight, a sudden fire lighting in her eyes.

Even the grandkids playing outside who have never been yelled at a day in their life stop with a jolt and go stark still in an evolutionary fear response as the entire house rattles with the force of Nana's resounding

"Alec Ezra Hardison!!! Have you lost your m-"

Holidays At Hardison's Masterpost

[kookicat]

The Stay Down Job

"For fuck's sake, Quinn," Eliot growls. "Let me up!" 

"No," Quinn says, and shifts his weight just enough to let Eliot know he means business. Normally they're evenly matched, but Eliot is mildly concussed at best, sporting a dislocated knee and a wrist that's rapidly swelling to twice its size. "They're safe, Eliot. Stay down," he says, trying for soothing, but the best he can manage is breathless, because Eliot is squirming like an eel under him. "Parker got Hardison out while we were taking care of the guards!" 

"Get the fuck off me, you bastard," Eliot snarls, with enough venom in his voice to make Quinn recoil a fraction. Quinn has Eliot's good arm pinned under a knee and a hand on Eliot's injured arm at the elbow, and he's damn glad, because otherwise he knows he'd be counting teeth. 

"If I let you up, do you promise not to do anythin' stupid?" Quinn asks, and makes the mistake of looking away for a split second when he hears the conference room door open. Eliot uses the distraction to twist his hips, almost throwing Quinn off but the younger hitter hangs on. 

"What in the hell is going on here?" Hardison asks. 

"Are you guys fighting?" Parker adds, and boosts herself to sit cross-legged on the big oak table. 

"Yes!" Eliot snaps, glaring at Quinn through tangled, sweat soaked hair that's just starting to curl. The bruise on his temple is dark and deep and spreading into his eye socket. It looks sore as hell, and Quinn winces in sympathy. 

"No!" Quinn says and relaxes his grip a fraction, hoping like hell he's not going to get thumped in the face. I like this shirt and blood is such a pain to get out, he thinks, and lets go of Eliot altogether when the dark haired man relaxes. "This dumbass wanted to go back for you guys despite the fact he can't walk!" 

Parker hops down from the table and drops to the floor, shoving at Quinn until he moves. She holds out a hand to Eliot. "Everything is fine. Let's go home."

The fight leaves him in a rush and he slumps against the floor, good hand lifting to cover his eyes, because his head is throbbing. "That sounds like a marvellous idea," he says, then peels one eye open to glare at the other hitter. Starting to fuckin sound like him now, Eliot thinks. 

"I'll get the van," Hardison says. It's not Lucille and it's not half as well stocked as her, but it'll get them home. 

"Want me to tag along?" Quinn asks, flexing his fingers, the smirk on his face just the right side of obnoxious. 

"You stay," Parker says and pulls an instant ice pack from her pocket, activating it and handing it to Eliot who presses it against his forehead. "You put Eliot on the floor, you can help me get him up."

"He did not!" Eliot mutters, the annoyance coming through just fine, even if he can't manage much volume, but he also doesn't complain when Quinn grabs hold of his shoulder and helps Parker haul him to his feet. 

They're all sweating by the time Eliot is upright, an arm over Parker and Quinn's shoulders. It's slow going, hobbling to the elevator, and when the doors finally open, Eliot laughs so hard he almost takes them all down. 

"What?" Quinn says, honestly baffled, trading a look with Parker who is just as confused. 

"I won," Eliot says. "There's blood all over that shirt. It'll never come clean." 

"Fuck," Quinn sighs, because the mirrored walls of the elevator show the stains off nicely. "I did like this shirt," he says, "but that doesn't mean you won." 

"Yeah, it does," Eliot insists, as if he's not standing with his weight on one leg, one eye so bruised and swollen he can't open it, with a wrist that's more black and blue than anything resembling flesh tones. 

"It was a draw at best," Quinn says, and cocks an eyebrow. 

"There's duck tape in the van," Parker says, and smiles, like Sophie showed her. "Don't make me use it." 

It's a remarkably quiet ride home after that. 

[prerodinu]

Artem was exhausted, setting up deals always made him so, plus he never actually slept good away from home. He always sent Katia to do things so he didn't have to worry himself half to death.

Now that he was noticing the time, he was worried. Castor hasn’t called and he wasn’t expecting a glowing review but he was expecting SOMETHING at least by now. He noticed that Dacian and Aurel were busy and that was fine. He had enough time to call Katia to let her know and give her approval.

She didn’t care just like he didn’t. Money wasn’t s big deal to them at least not currently. Maybe in millennia they could worry about it.

“Probably being a menace.” Castor was a particular brand of warmth. He talked a lot and not always when he should but Artem trusted him and that was enough.

It was only when Toshiro scaled him, looking for the window that he realized what was happening.

Artem was slow to get outside, blinking several times as Castor came up behind Wyatt with a sheepish smile on his features.

“Hey Artem!” He was gonna wave but a glare from Aurel who was standing behind Eliot kept him from saying much.

“You can say his name. Castor. It’s respectful. Just as your name is Wyatt and I won’t be insulting you either by calling you an asshole who needs to get laid.” He grasped onto the back of Toshiro's shirt shoving him behind himself. He wasn’t going to let the other get hurt cause Castor couldn’t remember details.

“Now, Toshiro and I were getting to know each other and I don’t particularly care for others insulting my own or Toshiro. Or interrupting me when I am getting to know someone as handsome as Toshiro. So Wyatt-” Artem laced his fingers with Toshiros leaning himself against the doorframe with a slow-growing smile.

“Shall we talk like adults, so I can make you a lot of fucking money and solve that vampire problem? Or you wanna burn the forest down which I’m sure is going to go well since it’s spelled to protect Toshiro and the pack even if it was your brand of magic I don’t think murdering an Alpha or attempting to would get you anywhere safely out of here.” He raised an eyebrow before his gaze went around to everyone who seemed to be gathering now to watch whatever was going to happen.

♚ — @prerodinu ;; in which Wyatt does nothing normally.

   Toshiro was attempting to balance Pack duties on top of negotiating with Ceto and Chyrvin, on top of court duties, on top of his restless wolf that wasn’t communicating very well with him on what the damn problem was–when he felt a jerk in the Pack bond and was suddenly filled with anxiety. It took him a whole two seconds, in which part of that was him physically climbing over Artem to get to the window to figure out why. 

   “Where is your witch?” Toshiro shot at the Alpha behind him before yanking the front door open and heading outside. He got a whole of two steps out of the Pack House before Wyatt shot a ball of fucking light at him and took out one the support beams on his house. Toshiro dodged to the side, rolled across the ground before it fell on him and quickly climbed back up to his feet. In that time Elliot had come running out of his own house and was currently looking like he was going to maul Wyatt. “What the fuck Wyatt?” 

   “You don’t have a doorbell.” He shrugged. 

   Shrugged–Toshiro was going to rip his throat out with his fucking teeth. 

   The Witch took a few steps forward, rolling his index finger and thumb together on his right hand, the other tucked behind his back. He inclined his head slightly and let his daze dart around, lingering a few minutes on Elliot. “I think you’re working tonight. Maybe keep the murderous look to a minimum or I’ll stick you on upstairs cleanup.” He shifts and drags his gaze back over to the man behind Toshiro. “You Artem? Had a visit from one of your dogs, fucking annoying chihuahua with a rambling personality.” 

   He’s closer now, enough that Toshiro’s wolf is telling him to go for his damn throat. He can feel a growl forming in his throat, claws digging into the palms of his hands. Wyatt meets Artem’s gaze, completely dismissing the angry rat dog near him. “What fucking Vampire are you trying to make a deal with me over? Because if it’s one fucking Reid, I’ll burn this damn forest down with you in it.”

   And Toshiro finally lunges for him.

[fluffypotatey]

Leverage 2x02

This show is so good why did it take me so long to come back T^T

Tap-Out Job they say… wonder if that’s bdsm or boxing. ELIOT EPISODE???👀👀👀👀please 🙏 please be an Eliot episode

ooooh Nebraska

IT IS BOXING

idk shit about boxing but my guess is that there’s steroids involved

Oh he looks drugged

Yikes

He’s fine

Maybe dead

Probably dead

God this intro 😂 so cheesy I love it

Oh so he’s still alive

Hmmmmm plant closed, Rucker something…..dots connecting

Ok so Rucker is a big deal wrestling ceo? He want a monopoly 

Awww Eliot geeking out over boxing 🥺🥺🥺 he better play. I want him to. For reasons

He’s been teaching Parker 🥺

Rip Hardinson

“Pilates or yoga?” Nate is so good at playing the ditzy asshole. Like he already is an asshole so it’s fun to see him play it up for cons

Hardinson talking about his special golf balls is so sweet but I have no idea what some of the words he is saying means but please keep talking sweetie

Rucker talking all polite but oh you can feel the anger in it 😂😂😂

ELIOT

YESSSSSSSSSSS YESSSSSSSSS

Jesus Christ what the fuck Rucker

YEAH ELIOT FUCK THEM UP

Parker’s little disguise 😂😂😂

Sophie :( chicken fried steak is good

“I can see you’ve had some training.” “…..some.” yeah some is right 

That’s a nice headshot, Sophie

Awwww Eliot 🥺 he needs to stop acting all soft and nervous I wanna squish him

ELIOT EPISODE! ELIOT EPISODE! ELIOT EPISODE! 

Sophie >:( pork rinds are good

ELIOT MY BELOVED!!!! He needs to stop being so sweet 🥺 Hardinson watch out

“White people doing white people things” 💀💀💀

Ok and how are they gonna steal a concert 🤨

Jesus, dude can’t you be nice :(

HEEHAW??????

Hardinson needing to check his name tag 💀💀💀

is that how tv works???? <- genuine question 

JIMMY YOU SNITCH

JENNY YOU SNITCH

ah shit

Tank, aka the dude who almost killed Mark. hmmmmm ‘spicious

oh come on, Rucker, playing your cards so soon??? you are going to let the con men know you know????  rookie mistake

Ok wait were they actually going to hurt Sophie >:(((((

Ugh Nate stop doing that!!! You didn’t have to let them know about Parker or Hardinson (BUT HE DOES IT BECAUSE HE CARES AND I KNOW THAT BUT NATE!!!!!)

Rucker really wants Eliot lmao

Rucker >:( 

Yessssss I believe in you Eliot (<- just wants to see him fight)

Ok uh, Eliot, I don’t trust this gym 

“I can take the punishment. It’s what I do.” Eliot what the fuck does that mean?????

I swear if they try to drug Eliot

BET IT ALL????? RUCKER????

Rucker that doesn’t sound legal

IF HIS WATER IS DRUGGED IMMA CRY

man I’m stressed

I want Eliot to win actually 

HE IS BLEEDING

NOOOOOOOOOO

I FUCKINH KNEW IT

is Tank dead????? 

OH SHIT 

ELIOT NO

NOOOOOOOOOOO HE IS SO SAD

of course he’s running lol

Ok but what if Tank isn’t dead and this was all a ploy

IS IT??????

I fucking knew it

PARKER

AND A SAX???????

I fucking knew the bet was through Hardinson!!!!!!

“Where’s your cousin Jinny now?” I LOVE HIM

AWWWWWWWWW happy ending 🥺🥺🥺🥺

YAY SHE LIKES PORK RINDS

General thoughts

ELIOT EPISODE!!!!!! It’s kind of sweet how we sort of know when each episode will focus on each character. Like Eliot is when they go rural, and Nate is if there are children. So I can now check off boxer after horse girl with Eliot ✅ and it’s interesting how can still see a strain on Sophie and Eliot’s dynamic but this time doesn’t have to do with betrayal but just understanding now. 

And ough the way Eliot plays the skittish dude who works under Nate out of debt for the com was just *chef’s kiss* I would have fallen for that persona instantly if he played THAG on me. The way this team would have conned me so bad if I was their target lol 

But yeah, this episode was so fun and I can’t believe I was fooled into the “Eliot got drugged” scene because these guys are smart!!!!! They would know he would play this and they just pretended like Rucker fooled them and AGHHHHH 🤧 lmao on to next episode